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#Actually I made myself cry while writing this post
sailorsally · 6 months
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What if one evening Dean found 'queering the map' while getting drunk to numb his pain of missing Cas and read some of the stories on there and then the next time missing Cas got unbearable he went back and one by one started adding his own lil snippets to the map, as if he was talking to Cas.
📍"This is the barn where we met for the first time (on this plane anyways). I stabbed you. You smiled at me. I knew nothing back then"
📍"I took you to this Den of Equity. In reality it was an excuse to spend the last night on earth with you."
📍"This is where I came up from purgatory, without you. Did you know I kept seeing you everywhere? Did you know I was thinking about coming back to find you?"
📍"We had some mean burgers here. Or rather I did. You ordered your usual - coffee, not to seem too suspicious. I don't know if you realized but you drank a sip or two that time. Little human things. It made me smile into my own cup. It made me hopeful"
📍"Once again you touched me to heal me and I thought to myself I could take any pain, even hell, if it meant I could feel your tender touch again"
📍"I buried your ashes here. There was a brook with a windmill nearby, a field full of forget-me-nots. As if I could ever forget you"
📍"There is a haunted house here. Or rather was (me and Sam took care of that) I killed myself here today. Briefly. But maybe I wanted it to stick this time."
📍"This phone booth is my favourite place in the whole wide world now. I still see you in its faint glow. So real, so solid, alive."
📍"You died here. After you told me I was the one thing you wanted and couldn't have. But you had me, sweetheart, you did, you do."
📍"Tomorrow we'll open a portal here. All the ingredients are gathered. The spells are ready. Tomorrow I'll get to kiss you for the first time."
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noxtivagus · 2 years
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>< it is 4 am i will sleep soon but
#🌙.rambles#it's not easy to just stop being confused and lost & stop worrying but#i feel a lot better tonight after remembering a lot of things n crying did help >< i think it's fine for me to do more tomorrow instead#regrets are hard to deal with but i know i'm stronger than them. so i'll prove it and rise above all that#oh yeah there's some stuff in particular that's weighing me down that r too personal for me to share with anyone but#i think i can handle that better now. in time.#we're all still so young n there's so much we have yet to learn and experience. we're still developing.... n that's part of being human.#GOD WAIT THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT TO WRITE WHEN I MADE THIS POST BUT YEAH POINT STANDS#i've just been listening to music for the past few hours i think while writing n doing other stuff#wait my mind is wandering;;;; i barely ate anything today.... just breakfast then some pastries then. half eaten lunch?#i'll take better care of myself tomorrow. this weekend. and next week especially when sembreak ! yes#i'm really gna have to sleep soon though oh my god how do i survive weekdays when i never get enough sleep unless i'm sick 😭😭#anyways. wait. music ! KINGDOM HEARTS.... FINAL FANTASY XV#started both in 2019 n finished in 2020 summer when i picked them up again.... wait.... my mind is wandering#i find it really interesting how the way we help others really says a lot about us ourselves as people#i've analyzed that a lot before n i am again now at 4 am oh no . i realize though that. for my own self#i'm actually rather affectionate at heart huh;;;; it makes me a bit shy thinking about that . i blame the stories and the final fantasy#compliments from the heart. how much i value you for who you are. and what you mean to me. i love to be direct about that#advice as the sort of person i know you are. because i love you. i'm romantic ! but not in a relationship way or wtvr here ok .#on that thought sometimes i realize i may often come across as aroace but goddamn i really just get shy n hide with that sort of topic#i will Deny till the day i die </3#i cld ramble more about this but it is now 4:20 n BACK TO KINGDOM HEARTS#hmm i was barely a teen when i played kh3/ffxv. thinking abt it n especially the latter really influenced me for life#earlier while listening to her ost i was thinking about how since i only played kh3 i don't know too much about the series' lore#& xion. but i find it interesting how. her theme is my fav from the charas. i really loved her name (i used it for the protag in a short#story back in gr9 for school). i never really knew too much about her but god i feel like. idk just a connection that's. hmmm#older now thinking more of her character she really really appeals to me. from her design n personality n it seems like fate. we're similar#wait this is so fucking dumb i searched up noctis n i immediately smiled . damn . he. 🥹 still so special to me#i shld replay kh3 n ffxv soon. my childhood. anyways it is nearly 4:40 holy shit i have to wake up at 5:30 GOOD NIGHT
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81folklore · 2 months
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heaven - OP81 - part 4
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pairings: oscar piastri x private!fem!reader (fc: gracie abrams)
summary: oscars winter break as seen through social media
type: social media au (smau)
authors note: THEYRE BACK BABYYY!! ive missed these two so much so here 🤲 i spent a while trying to decide what i wanted to happen with these two (already have some plans) but i needed to post and my current wip is so frustrating 😕
authors note 2: its official theyre my favorites, i had sooooo much fun writing this, just two babies in love!!!! requests are always open and feel free to come chat!! (also i wrote this at 6am so sorry if there are any typos🫶)
heaven masterlist masterlist
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yourusername
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liked by oscarpiastri, logansargeant and 9,289 others
always dressing up 🖤
📸 oscarpiastri
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yourfriend3 actually insane
yourfriend7 you are so lovely
oscarpiastri how are you even real
yourusername babyyyy☹️
oscarpiastri 😍😍
yourusername 🤩🤩
user5 ur outfits are always unreal
landonorris is thought u were staying in tonight??
yourusername we are..i dressed up for fun😁
user7 THE WOMAN THAT YOU ARE
user18 SKWKZIWJJS
user93 my jaw DROPPED
yourfriend2 my favorite outfit of yours!!
user54 biggest question is if we’ll get winter break content😕
yourusername
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liked by oscarpiastri, yourfriend1 and 13,279 others
my favorite time of year💫
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oscarpiastri weenie waits for no one
yourusername heyy he likes sleeping in the warm☹️☹️
oscarpiastri still steals my seat😕
user54 oh my god
user3 DID OSCAR TAKE THOSE?!
yourusername yesss🫠
yourfriend6 see you soon!!
user68 the outfits NEVER disappoint
user2 im so ok
user26 THE FOURTH PHOTO??
user63 THE LAST PHOTO??
user5 you are so so pretty
yourusername thank uuuu🫶
oscarpiastri
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liked by aussiegrit, yourusername and 436,742 others
life without racecars☀️
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user54 OH MY GOD
user77 i may never recover
yourusername weenie and back photos oh i won *liked by creator*
landonorris ?!?!!?!
user2 LMAOOOO
user4 i feel ill i cant cope
user32 i need someone to love me the way they love each other
yourusername ☀️☀️
user9 the third photo..the THIRD PHOTO
user44 don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry
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yourusername
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liked by oscarpiastri, landonorris and 14,281 others
oscar oscar oscar
i hold so much love for you i often feel like its about to spill out of me, unable to be contained, and when im with you i let it. i let it fill the room and cover you until you really feel how much i love you
every day i wake up thinking about how lucky i am that i get to love you, that i get to live with you. its a blessing and im the luckiest girl in the world
ill never be able to fully explain just what you mean to me, just how much youve impacted and improved my life. everyday i find myself thinking of you and finding bits of you in places i least expect and then i get filled with this happiness that i only experience with you
you are the light of my life oscar piastri and i will love you in every universe, i promise
tagged oscarpiastri
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oscarpiastri i love you more than words can describe, you have made me the happiest man alive
oscarpiastri i am in awe of you every single day and i cannot believe i get to spend them with you
yourusername 🩷🩷
op81priv
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liked by yourusername, ln4priv and 37 others
the love i feel for you is infinite and is strong enough to keep me alive forever
you keep my heart filled with a love that ive never felt before and i will only ever feel for you
you’re my forever person, my bestfriend and i will love you until i cant love any more
comments on this post have been limited
yourusername oh oscar i love you so much
yourusername forever sounds perfect to me
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yourusername added to their story
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711 notes · View notes
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D-RIDING?! PART TWO (18+)
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‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎PART ONE | PART TWO | PART THREE
GENDER: FTM READER (M!READER FRIENDLY)
SUMMARY: You, a famous YouTuber, got noticed by idol crush, Bang Chan, from an "accidental" drunk tweet you made when he was in BuzzFeed. Now you are waiting in your house to make that tweet into a reality.
GENRE(S): Smut (mercy on me yall), Explicit, Fluff, comedy (cringe because I need one mentally)
SEPARATE WARNING(S):
‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ READER:
Role(s): Submissive Bottom. You are a versatile bottom because I said so.
Genitals: I made it separate since there are people out there who do have a bottom surgery.
T-dick section: So one will have you having a t-dick (mentions of squirting).
Dick Section: While a separate one in the same post will have you having a Penis.
(I don't want y'all feeling uncomfortable/Gender Dysphoria as a TransMan myself)
Names: Pretty boy, Baby boy, Handsome, Cutie, Sweetheart
‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ CHAN:
Role(s): Dominate Top. Made him Versatile too.
Genitals: He has a big dick because of the big nose theory.
Names: Chan, Chris, love, pretty boy
OTHER WARNING(S): You both are virgins, Oral (Reader receiving), Mentions of Vagina/T-Dick(Mentions of squirting) for the reader along with a separate one of you having a Dick. Nipple play (Reader receiving), Reader getting Manhandled kinda, Choking? Not breathplay. Cum licking, Mentions of your chest scars (or just chest) Fingering. Anal sex. Beggingish?. Praising. Different words for Dick and Vagina. Crying (reader)
OTHER(S): y'all, please have mercy on me! I never wrote smut before so this might make me leap over a bridge!
Please like, reblog and/or comment for my dignity.
Tags: @braveangel777 @1s3v3n1 @kodasstar @webwanderer @coralblook @ironhyacinth @bitchyzombienacho
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IM BEING SO FR, I CANT WRITE SMUT- I CANT WRITE SMUT! HAVE MERCY ON ME AHHHH!
(I DIDNT PROOF READ OR HAD GRAMMAR CHECK, YALL GOT IT!)
It was refreshing.
You lay yourself down on your bed wearing your pajamas, silk pajamas, covering your naked body. The silk only stops at your thighs.
You waited for Chan to message you as you scroll through your fans' comments; requesting collabs, games, or other content to record.
You keep on scrolling, almost forgetting about the whole sexual situation going on until you hear a knock from your front door.
You walk out from your bedroom, holding your phone out and texting him if he was the one behind the door of your front entrance.
CB97: Why don't you find out, Cutie?
You sighed, as you slowly unlocked the door then slowly opened the door to check it was actually him.
A white hand pushes the door fully, revealing the man himself, smirking at you. He was wearing a black shirt, compressing his muscles with baggy sweatpants.
He was checking you out, blushing a bit from the silk pajamas going nice with your figure and skin color.
"Don't you look lovely, pretty boy?" Chris comments, his eyes still lingering in your body.
You felt yourself getting flustered, shy even just from him staring at you. He steps closer to you while closing the door behind him.
"Can I touch you?"
You nodded and just by that Chris leans into you, kissing your soft lips while his hands roam around your waist, while one hand grips your butt.
You moaned softly around his mouth.
Your arms around his neck as your hands slowly reach to his shirt, gripping it as you push your face away from Chris.
He looks at you confused, giving you almost puppy eyes.
You thought it was cute. Yousmirked as you took him to your room.
He looks around, admiring your room until you smash your face into his lips again, catching him off guard but quickly kissed you back.
You both feel impatient, as you take off Chan's black shirt as he pushes you down on the bed, prying off the silk pajamas.
"You are already naked underneath, you were really expecting me, huh?" His accent, his voice raspy, making you want him more and more.
‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎WARNING: T-DICK SECTION
For the people with no bottom surgery/testosterone:
He had you trapped, both of his hands holding your waist as he leans into your chest, giving a few kisses on your chest scar (or chest)
"So handsome..." He mutters as he continues on kissing you as you feel his hands reaching up to your chest, caressing your nipples as the other hand reaches between your thighs.
You moaned, feeling his fingers playing around your folds.
"You are so wet for me, baby boy. Do I really get you this wet? I'm so flattered..." He whispers into your ear.
All you can do is moan, nodding your head as you feel your thighs parting from each other.
You look down to see Chan giving a few kisses on your left thigh then giving a few more kisses, almost getting closer to your wet folds.
"I want to taste you so bad, would you let me taste you, sweetheart?" He looks up at you, waiting for your response.
"Please, Chris! I need you.."
He smiles, leaning his head towards your t-dick, immediately licking and sucking your folds. Even getting closer to your small dick, giving a few licks.
You moaned, as you moved your bottom area getting more pleasure, almost riding his face. You even felt his nose touching your dick, sending more pleasure into your body.
Chan lets you as he continues on licking and sucking, moaning a bit, sending vibrations through your body.
You continue on moving your body, feeling yourself getting close. Your body is twitching, as Chris raises his fingers closer to your t-dick, rubbing quickly as you moan even louder.
"Chris—a~ah, I'm cumming! F-fuck!"
He sucks harder and even rubs even faster until you finally cum, squirting.
Chan licks one more time as he moves his face away slowly as he stands up, admiring your sweaty figure.
You sit up as your legs twitch a bit.
"Damn, I squirted. This kinda embarrassing..."
Chan just laughed as he leans closer to your face giving a few kisses to your forehead and cheek.
‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎WARNING: DICK SECTION
For the people with bottom surgery/has a dick:
He had you trapped, both of his hands holding your waist as he leans into your chest, giving a few kisses on your chest scar. (Or chest)
"So handsome..." He mutters as he continues on kissing you as you feel his hands reaching up to your chest, caressing your nipples as the other hand reaches between your thighs.
You moaned, feeling his fingers playing the tip of your dick.
"You are so hard for me, baby boy. Do I really get you this hard? I'm so flattered..." He whispers into your ear.
All you can do is moan, nodding your head as you feel your thighs parting from each other.
You look down to see Chan giving a few kisses on your left thigh then giving a few more kisses, almost getting closer to your hard cock.
"I want to taste you so bad, would you let me taste you, sweetheart?" He looks up at you, waiting for your response.
"Please, Chris! I need you.."
He smiles, leaning his head towards your dick, immediately licking and sucking the tip. Pushing his head down, giving you a good suck.
You moaned, as you moved your bottom area getting more pleasure, almost riding his face. Chan lets you as he continues on licking and sucking, moaning a bit, sending vibrations through your body.
You continue on moving your body, feeling yourself getting close. Your body is twitching, as Chris raises his hands closer to your balls, fumbling around as you moan even louder.
"Chris—a~ah, I'm cumming! F-fuck!"
He sucked harder and faster until you finally cum, some hitting his face.
Chan licks one more time as he moves his face away slowly as he stands up, admiring your sweaty figure.
You sit up as your legs twitch a bit.
"Damn, that felt weird...."
Chan just laughed as he leans closer to your face giving a few kisses to your forehead and cheek.
"But, you enjoyed it didn't you?" He questions, as he continues on kissing your face.
"I did, but let's get into the main event, shall we?" Chris chuckles as you stand back up, holding between his baggy pants, pushing it down and throwing it to the side.
He looks down at you while chuckling again, smirking from how impatient you were.
His dick flings up, standing a bit straight and even dripping with pre-cum.
You licked your lips, your mouth just watering from the sight of his dick, however, you felt yourself getting kinda scared since it looks big.
"Chan, how big is your dick? I mean I knew it was big because of the nose theory..."
"Huh, what nose theory?"
"Focus on the question and not the nose theory—I'll tell you that later."
You look up at him as he thinks, then shrug.
"I don't know, I never measured my dick before..."
"Fuck you mean you never measured your dick? You know what, wait right here. You grab the lube and the condom from the cabinet next to my bed."
Chan did exactly what you said while still looking perplexed that his dick size really bothered you that much.
You came back, holding a measuring tape.
You sat back down on the bed as you told Chris to come clover to your face. You felt his dick touching your cheek.
You licked your lips as you raised the measuring tape. Chan just chuckled on how focused you were.
"Is it really that serious...?"
You just nodded until you reached the top of the tip.
"Damn, 8 inches? I guess OT8 is for life, huh?"
Chan groans, as he smacks on top of your head softly. "Don't ever say that again..." He jokingly said, shaking his head, smiling.
"Anyways, let's continue."
"Gladly." He says as he pushes you down, putting you into a mating press.
You hear a bottle cap opened making you shivered in anticipation.
He squirts a generous amount into his fingers.
You felt his fingers circling around your rim as his other hand gripped your neck, holding you down.
You whimpered, shaking your butt for him to just insert in already.
"P-please Chris~ Fuck, hurry up!" You whined.
"Sorry baby boy, let me give you what you want~" He teases you as you feel one of his fingers inserting in.
You hiss in pain, not used to the feeling at all. Chan shushes you as he tries to calm you down, giving you a few kisses in your back.
"It will feel good, I promise..."
You calm yourself down, moving your waist side to side.
He gently plays with your rim as he slowly inserts another one. You hissed a bit but you could slowly feel the pleasure going through your body.
He continues on fucking you until he hits a certain area making you moaned along with your toes curling.
"Found it..." He whispers, hitting your prostate while inserting the third finger in.
You moaned, sending Chris's dick even harder; throbbing and aching in pain. He was getting hot and bothered—impatient—but he didn't want you to feel uncomfortable so he continued on. He adds a fourth one just in case after finding out his dick was 8 inches.
"Chan, love, just put it in already!" You whined.
You didn't need to tell him twice.
He quickly rips the plastic out with his teeth then taking the condom out and putting it on his dick.
He quickly takes his fingers off as he lines his dick up your hole, tapping it a few times until he slowly inserts the tip in.
You hissed again. Even though his fingers were thick, nothing could beat his thick cock (corny).
He apologized softly, while he hissed too from the clench.
"Fuck, so tight. I'm going to push in more, okay sweetheart?"
All you can do was whine while he slowly pushes in more. You both hissed again as you felt tears coming out of your eyes.
Chris hands both made it to your waist, going in circles.
He inserts more until finally he fills you whole.
He waits as he groans, your hole tightening around him as he tries not to cum just from it. He bites his lip as he caresses you again.
You felt warmth in your chest, loving the care from Chris and the fact he even was waiting for you to get used to his size.
You smiled softly as you shook your butt, making him grip your waist.
"You can move, love~"
Just like that, he pulls his dick out and slams back into you making you moan. He was already going rough, almost like a crazy animal.
He keeps on going, angeling himself a bit as he slams again and again, hitting your prostate.
You moaned even louder, gripping the sheets.
"F-FUCK~♡ CHRIS A~AH!" You cried out in pleasure as he continued on abusing your prostate. You felt overwhelmed by the amount of pleasure he was giving you.
You both moaned out of pleasure feeling yourself getting closer. He was getting closer as well, you feel his dick twitch inside of you.
He leans in, his chest on top of your back, whispering sweet words to your ears making you shiver.
"P-pretty boy~ I'm about to cum...Are you about to cum as well? Hmm?" He whispers.
You repeated the word 'Yes' as he continued slamming until finally you both released. Chan's cum filling the condom whole.
He steps out, taking the condom out and tying it then throwing it away into the garbage bin.
You turn your body around, laying flat, your back facing the bedsheets as you calm yourself down.
Chan walks up to you then lies down next to you. "I never did this before so I wanna know (Knaur) if I did good?"
You smiled, feeling horny all of sudden from his sweet voice. His duality from being all dominant to almost submissive—You kinda wanna ride him until he breaks.
"it's my first time as well, Chan and you did so well for me, love..." You said to him, kissing him all over his face.
He chuckles, smiling widely from your praises until he yawns, clearly drained.
"I'm tired, my body is tired. Maybe we should've had sexs not around the performance. Haha!" He laughs, not noticing your eyes staring into him like you were going to devour him.
"Yeah, but, I'm quite disappointed..." You sadly said—well pretending to be sad—using your fingers to trace around his neck.
"h-huh? Why? You said I did good?" He sits up, looking at you like a sad puppy. (There is no pet play)
"of course! You did so well, but my tweet. You remember it don't you?" You said calmly as you continued on looking at him.
He thinks for a second until his face turns red.
"O-oh."
Oh indeed.
"B-but, aren't you tired, I'm quite tired myself..." He rambles until you shut him up by placing your hands around his mouth.
"But you promise you want to make that tweet into reality, right? I want to ride your dick until you cry. Calling my name. Plus, I'm doing all the work. You can just lay down and look pretty, my pretty boy~"
His face turns even more red, all of sudden turning shy and weak. His cock going hard again, throbbing in anticipation.
"Even your dick seems to agree with me~"
You can't wait to actually make that tweet into reality.
TO BE CONTINUED...
Ending (myself) in part three.
YALL IMMA KMS, I CANT WRITE SMUT WTF AHHHH
443 notes · View notes
ponderingmoonlight · 6 months
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Heyyy, i love ur jjk fics so when u posted abt writing for aot i SCREAMED bc ik you'll do it justice 😩❤❤
Do u reckon u could do like a levi post rumbling fic bc i need the confort rn and SO DOES HE I NEED HAPPY LEVI PLSS ❤❤❤🙏🙏🙏
When I tell you I had to write this IMMEDIATELY <3 Please let me know if you like it, this is my first AOT fic EVER
Levi finally getting his happy end with (y/n) after the rumbling
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Pairing: Levi Ackerman x fem!reader
Word Count: 2k
Synopsis: When he met you after first stepping a foot at Marley, Levi didn't forget you until the very end. But while he thought you died through the rumbling, he meets you again for his happy end.
Warnings: this is the comfort I needed, I actually had to cry while writing this, not proofread because I wanted to publish this asap
Tags: @sanicsmut begging on my knees, please I hope you like this
You’ve been on his mind ever since he met you on that fateful day at Marley. So gorgeous that he couldn’t take his eyes off you, a smile so sweet it could melt even metal. Yes, you were so different from what he expected to find across that ocean, a truly pleasant surprise to say the least.
“Oh, you are quite small for a grown man!” you commented, giggling so effortlessly that Levi wasn’t able to even react to your rude comment.
“But to be honest, I’m a little small myself. Well, not all of us can be tall, right? Where are you from, stranger?”
“None of your business.”
His voice sounded harsher that anticipated, making your joyful face drop in an instant. Why…Why the hell did it even bother him to see you like that, that sad glow that formed in your eyes?
“I’m not from here”, he added.
“Oh, I see! Don’t worry about it too much, it’s like everywhere else!”
Oh, if you only knew how wrong that statement was.
His eyes landed on your right arm and the star that covered the sleeve of your blouse. Why would you wear such a badge? Upon closer inspection, he noticed your shattered clothing, the hem of your earth coloured dress completely torn.  
Before Levi was even able to react two men ran into you, forcefully pushing your body into the dirt of the streets.
“Get out of the way, scum”, one of them hissed towards you.
Anger rose inside his veins immediately. You were just standing there, minding your own business. Why on earth did they push you?
“Watch your step”, his voice suddenly called towards the men.
“Please, it’s alright. Don’t get into trouble because of me.”
And then your hand rested against his shoulders, making his heart beat so loud that Levi swore you could hear it. What was this? Why did your little innocent touch turn him all flustered?
Something about you just seems different. No, despite the fact that it is so wrong, despite being here only for a mission, his mind wanders to you every free second.
Even though you might be dead by now.
“I will leave after tonight”, he announced into darkness, your moonlit features making it hard for him to focus on staying serious.
Your lip began to tremble, glossy eyes darting towards him.
“What? But why do you have to leave? You just arrived…”
“I came here because I have a mission to accomplish, (y/n).”
“But you will return when you’re done, right?”
The hopeful tone in your voice killed him from the inside. Oh, how much he wished he could just take you with him, how much he’d love to have more time with you. But this is simply not possible.
His cold eyes glared at you through the darkness, desperately trying to keep his composure.
“I might never return to this place, (y/n).”
You felt like someone pulled the ground from beneath your feet. Within the last few weeks, you learned that Levi’s hard façade isn’t more than a trick. No, in fact, he carries a character made of pure gold.
You started to like him.
“Then I’ll find you wherever you’ll go.”
And you did. You never missed to write him letters. Levi can’t help but wonder how you did that, your elegant handwriting following him through the darkness of the night, lighting up his mood despite the situation he’s in. Yes, he looked forward hearing from you every single day.
Until the rumbling started.
Until he didn’t receive any letters from you anymore.
It broke his heart, waking up from his coma with all that was on his mind being your stunning smile.
“Did I receive any letters from her?”
“You mean (y/n)? No, not until it all started. She lived in the northern area of Marley so it’s very likely that…”
His heart shattered into a million pieces, dead eyes staring into the distance. Your beautiful smile, that promise you gave him the night before he left. The thought of you getting trampled to death…
“Don’t say it.”
“Hey, maybe she did it somehow. (y/n) is a smart woman. I’m sure she found a way out.”
“Don’t be ridiculous, shitty four-eyes. She’s dead.”
He has seen it all, countless people died in front of his very own eyes. Why would it be different this time? Why shouldn’t you of all people be taken away from him? A little spark of luck, a minor ray of sunshine in this sheer darkness.   
He leans back in his wheelchair, darkness consuming him all over again. You deserved so much better, your whole life was still ahead of you. In a world that never wanted you, you always kept your smile as bright as the sun. Despite the fact that they treated you like the dirt underneath their feet, despite how poorly the circumstances were, your smile beamed brighter than anything else.
“What would it give me to burry myself in sadness? I only have this one life, why not making the best of it?”
The best…
“Fuck!” he cries out, slamming a nearby book against the wall in frustration.
Why you? Why out of all the people, you are the one who had to lost her precious life? He never had the chance to tell you how he feels, how you turned his world upside down, that he survived for you.
Dear captain Levi (I love to call you that),
How are you? I hope your mission is going well and that you’ll return soon. I have some exciting news to share with you! After working so much over the last few weeks, I was finally able to buy myself a new dress! Although I wanted to get a white one because I know you love the colour, I bought a dark green one in honour of you. When you come back, we’ll be matching!
I miss you and our conversations late at night. Please tell me you and the others are okay.
In love,
(y/n)
That dark green dress he never got so see, the joy you fuelled inside of him despite being hundreds of miles away from him. God, how much he misses you. How much he fucking misses talking to you through the darkness of the night, to hear from the world through the unwavering veil of your optimism. What would he give to stretch out his hands after you for once, holding you tightly against his chest? It truly kills him from the inside, knowing he will never be able to hold your hand or kiss your lips tenderly, that you’ll never tell him old fairy tales anymore.
You were special. An angel in a world full of devils. Your word alone should have been enough to end every war in the blink of an eye. It definitely was enough to end the war inside himself.
“Captain Levi, will you assist me?”
“Stop calling me that, Onyankopon”, Levi mumbles, silently following the taller man into the heart of the city.
The war made the remaining 20% realize how precious being alive is only after their lives hanging on a thread. While the others carried on with their lives, Levi himself got stuck in this cursed city, the city he last saw you in. Returning to Paradis would mean giving up on you, giving up on the spell you put on him. And he simply can’t take it. Even though the whole town got destroyed by the merciless feet of titans, despite numerous people telling him than no one was able to escape, he always looked out for that dark green dress you described to him.
“Thank you”, a little girl giggles at him, eyes widen at the delicious sight of the lollipop in her hands.
All he can do is stare at the ground in front of her tiny feet with empty eyes. How nice it must be to have something to hold onto in times like these, after losing everything and everyone.
“Hey, can I get another one?”
“Don’t get greedy, young lady!”
That voice, that angelic voice almost reminds him of you. How long has it been since you last spoke to him? So long that the sound of your speech slowly fades in the back of his mind.
But that woman, that woman almost sounds like you. His gaze wanders up her dirty shoes, the hem of her green dress…
A green dress. Dark green, to be exact.
“Levi?”
His eyes widen, his heart stops beating.
No, this can’t be. Is it a dream?
“Levi Ackerman? Is that you?”
His gaze darts towards your face, time stands still. Your facial features, your joyful eyes. It’s you, it has to be you. Without any doubt.
“(y/n)”
He can’t catch his breath, his orbs lingering over your delicate figure, your dark green dress.
That dark green dress.
Before he can stop himself, his eyes get glossy. It is really you. You’re standing in front of him, uninjured, just like you did before.
“Levi!”, you cry out.
In the matter of seconds, you kneel in front of him, hungry arms holding onto his frame for dear life. Oh god, how much you prayed to see that man again, how much you longed to finally be able to hold him in your arms.
“I never gave up hope. I always believed in your abilities and that you’ll return to me someday”, you mutter against his chest, your salty tears soaking through the fabric of his shirt.
“I thought you were dead.”
His voice isn’t more than a fade away whisper, hand running through your soft hair. He always wondered how it would feel against his fingertips. And now you’re here. In his arms, alive.
You are alive.
“I’m fine. I did leave this town just in time because I wanted to see you again. It was a close call, I almost got crushed but…I made it. I couldn’t leave after telling you the fairy tale about the fox and the rabbit, right?”
Silent tears stream down his face like a waterfall while you cry rivers against his chest. His whole life Levi was haunted by loss and grief. As if he was cursed, everyone around him seemed to die in front of his very eyes. Just after letting himself fall, after trusting someone, after gifting them his feelings…They just lost their lives like flies.
But you’re safe and sound, you look just like you did in his memory.
“I love you, (y/n). I should have told you this way sooner and I did all of this just to return to you.”
Your heart sinks in your chest, body overflowing with feelings. Without thinking twice, you press your lips against his scarred ones, letting yourself sink into his lap while your hands hold onto his face for dear life. This man right in front of you, the man who never left your mind, the man who risked his life to save yours. He survived. He survived and came back to you just like you always dreamed of.
“I love you too”, you shriek, smiling at him so widely with tears overflowing in your eyes that you make his world whole again.
“But as you see, I’m not the man you met back then…”, he begins, looking down his disabled body.
You shake your head vehemently, gently taking his hands into yours.
“All I see is the man I love and waited for”, you reply.
You wipe away your tears and a trail of snot in the most unladylike and precious way Levi ever witnessed before standing up and straighten your skirt with trembling hands.
“So now, what do you think? How do you like my now old new dress?” you croak.
You twirl around, making his life complete. This. This is exactly what he fought for, why he never gave up even after Hange dedicated her life. You standing in front of him in that dark green dress, smiling widely after he told you that he loves you.
This is all he ever wanted.
“You look lovely. Absolutely lovely, (y/n)”, he replies.
And for the first time since forever, a genuine smile is formed on his face.  
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olichat-reads · 2 years
Text
Confession
Bakugou x shy!reader
Summary: going out of the way to confess to your crush for the sake of confessing didn't go the way you thought it would.
A/n: I write for myself quite a bit but this is the first proper oneshot I've actually completed & deem okay to post hehe. VERY SELF INDULGENT BUT WHO CARES. I love this gremlin a lot & I hope the characterization isn't too off (ノ´ヮ`)ノ*: ・゚
🌟
Y/n blinked at him blankly. Not being able to process what was happening.
"The hell you looking at me like that for? Was that confession of yours a fucking joke or somethin-?!" Bakugou growls out, voice raising as annoyance took over his features, clearly misinterpreting your stunned silence.
I mean, you had reason to be shocked. Not your fault.
"You've got some guts to play with me," Bakugou spits out in his growing anger, quirk sparking to life in his hand.
That snapped you out of it.
"Wait, wait! Eek!" You squeaked out, fists protectively shielding your head from the blonde boy's growing rage. Forcing your eyes open to meet his glare as you trembled in place.
"I-I meant it! I meant every word! I was just so shocked you didn't reject me!" You cry out fearfully, eyes wide as you watched Bakugou's face scrunch up in confusion at your admission.
"Hah?!???"
"Eek! I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I-"
"Shut up for a fucking second won't you," he cut you off with a growl making your mouth snap shut, wide, terrified eyes staring at him, quite clearly regretting all your life choices that led up to this moment. Bakugou let out an exasperated sigh at your reaction, rubbing a hand down his face.
After a moment of eyeing your trembling figure, Bakugou slowly began to make his way over to you, like a predator stalking its prey and it took everything in your willpower to stay rooted in place and not run away squeaking.
He stopped once he was right in front of you. You could feel yourself freezing up at how close you were together, finding interest in the ground beneath your shoes all of a sudden, not able to meet Bakugou's burning gaze.
"Oi. Look it at me."
The request made a whine of embarassment bubble up from your throat but you slowly lifted your head anyways, doing your best not to flinch away at meeting Bakugou's red eyes.
Pretty red eyes.
Bakugou wore an blank look on his face as he looked down at your much smaller form. He had his hands in his pockets as he watched you squirm for a heartbeat before speaking.
"Asking for my response and immediately assuming my answer was stupid, don't you think?"
"I-" you started but immediately shutting up when he narrowed his eyes at you, daring you to even try going on another nervous tangent.
"Did you want to get rejected, dumbass?"
Your eyes widened at his question. Where on earth was this going?
"Uh. Um- n-no. Of course not. I just-" you cut yourself off before you rambled again. Wringing your sweat soaked hands nervously.
"So. If given a chance, you'd want to date me?" He intergorates, eyebrow raised.
What is happening. What is happening. What is happening-
"..yes?" You manage to squeak out.
You almost faint at the smirk that overtakes Bakugou's handsome face. Slowly, he leaned into you, leaving mere inches between your faces. You could feel your face absolutely burning at his close proximity. He could probably hear your heart threatening to pound out of your chest.
Oh my god. Too much, too much!! Was he trying to kill you?!?
"You sure? No take backs," he drawls out teasingly.
You could only nod in repsonse, words failing you at this point.
"Words, bunny."
Your heart fluttered at the nickname, cheeks flushing hot.
"Yes, please," you managed to choke out, your voice barely a whisper.
His smirk grew wider. Out of nowhere, you felt a hand ruffle your head, making you jump in surprise. Your wide eyes never leaving Bakugou's as he slowly leaned back, getting out of your face, all while staring down at you smugly.
"What- what just happened?" You stuttered out. All this was too much for your poor head to process, much less with having your crush's undivided attention on you for so long was making you dizzy. You brain is mush at this point.
Bakugou rolled his eyes at your question.
"You got yourself a boyfriend, dumbass," he states matter-of-factly as if its the most obvious thing in the world. Hand leaving your head, he began to stroll back towards the school block. Looking back at your unmoving form still frozen in place, he paused to call out a "you coming?"
Blinking back at him dumbly, you barely found your voice to respond. "I, um. I don't think I can move right now. Y-you go ahead," you replied, genuinely feeling like you might collapse if you tried to move a muscle at this immediate moment.
"You need me to carry your ass back or something-"
"OH MY GOD STAY BACK OR I WILL FAINT. MY HEART CAN'T TAKE ANY MORE THAN THIS. HAVE MERCY-" you blurt out in a panic, making the blonde bark out laughing at you outburst.
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mrswolffs-blog · 1 month
Note
Heyy!!! I was wondering can you write a one with Lewis c black reader Toto? Like Toto and reader are married and poly and they have a secret relationship with Lewis and one day Lewis gets injured in a race so she goes to check on him and they assume she’s cheating on Toto until he confesses that there all in a relationship with each other! I don’t know it’s up to you!
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The fun part of being in a polyamorous relationship with two of the most popular men in the United Kingdom, is the fact that it was kept a secret from the world as we snuck around; playing hide and seek.
Today is the second to last race of the season as both of my partners prepare themselves for the hectic race ahead. The cars were checked over and both drivers were inspected as to be sure they were fit to drive out in the sun today before everyone started getting dressed and heading to their cars.
I for one always stayed by my husband's side as to not draw suspicion with Lewis; I had a bad feeling about thus race and so I kinda just sticked myself to his side, leaving my husband with George and the computers with analysis that I will never understand.
Walking along the corridors, Lewis and laced ourselves together in a tight hug as he swayed me from left to right. "Promise me you'll be careful?" I asked low but loud enough for him to hear. "I'm always careful sweetheart. I would never be careless when I have you to return to" he said softly as he kissed my forehead.
Time passed and all the drivers were now line up on the grid waiting for the green light that came sooner than I wanted. The race went on with me being extremely anxious, feeling the need to puke everything Lewis had to take a sharp turn in the narrow corners.
TOTO'S POV
Lewis had been going good for the most part, George looks to be a bit struggling and honestly this has been our reality for a while. Y/n has been jerking anxiously beside me as she had made her concern about the race earlier and I'm honestly concerned with her state.
Turning in my seat to speak to Bono, after a minute I heard shouting. Spinning around, I realised that my wife is being held back by some mechanics as she begged them to allow her go out. Swiftly running over and taking her from them, she broke down in my arms crying. "He crashed Torger, I told you we should've had the reserve driver go in today." She referred to Lewis who was just getting out of the car.
Allowing her to go out, she walked straight to the entrance where the safety car would arrive with Lewis, as I went to check on George.
LEWIS' POV
The safety car stopping at the entrance and allowing me to exit, I spotted Y/n running straight for me as she landed in my arms. Hearing her sniffles, I ran my hand over her curls instead of risking to knot my hand into her hair.
Whispering calming words into her ears, I kissed all over her face, stopping at her lips. Unbeknownst to us, camera had actually followed her 6here and the moment was spread live.
Upon returning to the garage, everyone stared as Toto engulfed us into a hug. The post race interviews came with everyone questioning what happen, and for a while I said nothing so everyone's best guess was that Y/n wad having an affair with me and Toto was allowing it.
Fans started trashing her online within seconds and Toto and I could not have that happening so we went to the last inter view together, finally responding to the question "My wife is not having an affair, the three of us are in a polygamous relationship- not that it's any of your business but I would like for y'all to stop slandering my innocent wife's name" Toto answered, stunning everyone as I just stood back and smiled at Y/n who I could see had fallen asleep on the couch at the garage's entrance. Overtime the fans came to term with it and eventually loved seeing all three of us together; there were no more problems.
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lixxpix · 3 months
Text
happiness looks good on you- lee felix
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summary: you love felix, but he doesn't love you back.
warnings: sad ending, angst!
author's notes: hi everyone<3 this is my first fic, kinda wrote this at like 3am on a whim instead of sleeping but like😭 idk why i made this so sad (is this a sign im depressed or something) but hope u enjoy!! please to comment ur user if u want to be tagged in this or my future posts<3
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"happiness looks good on you."
raging storms and unshed tears.
"happiness looks good on you."
heartbreak and rainy days.
"hurry up lix, we're going to be late," you complained, brow furrowed as you stuck your bottom lip out in a pout.
"if you really want to go to school that early just walk there yourself." felix taunted, knowing you were scared to walk alone. he was your long-term best friend, inseparable since kindergarten 'til today.
the two of you argued and bickered on the way to school, throwing insults at each other. by the time the both of you had gotten to school, you were both given a scolding and told to sit down. you glared at him as you were being scolded while he just snickered.
the audacity of this man, honestly . 
by the time class had finished, you had cooled down, just like felix knew you would. otherwise, he could just stick out his bottom lip while you huffed and pretended to be mad. 
"y/n!" he gasped, clutching at your arm, "areum just looked at me!"
he squealed, like a little kid at the toy shop, over his long time crush.
if only you looked at me in that way.
because i do.
"nah, she probably was just looking at someone else." you lied through your teeth, feeling your heart sink.
"hey, stop being mean!! she clearly looked at me," he pouted.
you sighed.
i've loved you for years and you've never noticed.
"well just confess to her already then."
it was painful watching your own crush and best friend fall for someone else, someone that wasn't you. 
you wished, rather selfishly, that areum would reject him. then you could be the shoulder he would cry on. not her. but honestly, you couldn't bring yourself to hate her. what was to hate? she was pretty, got good marks, and was friendly and easygoing. not to say you yourself weren't pretty, but you just weren't as pretty and hardworking as her. 
and you weren't the one he wanted. 
maybe the pain would end if they just ended up together and you were out of the picture. it was obvious she liked him too. 
"you really think i should? but what if i get rejected..."
you're so blind but i still love you.
"yes, how many times do i have to say this, she likes you. it's obvious." you rolled your eyes.
"should i just confess tomorrow? better late than never..." he trailed off, worrying at his bottom lip with his teeth.
gods you look so cute when you do that.
"yeah. get her some flowers and write her a note."
why were you breaking your own heart? you didn't know why. maybe you just wanted to end your own heartbreak. 
"good luck with that, anyways i need to go to s house for a project." you actually didn't, but you would do anything to just escape from this.
"why~~are you really just going to leave me alone to plan my big confession by myself," he whined.
"sorry lix, but you'll figure it out." ruffling his hair, you walked out the classroom.
you did, in fact, go home. then sat on your bed and cried until you couldn't  physically squeeze any more tears out of you.  so this was what heartbreak felt like. you had known him since the both of you were ten. you had have multiple crushes here and there, but they were just passing, fleeting moments, nothing of importance. until him.
you didn't know when you had first started to like him. maybe it was that time in the library where he was helping the librarian stack books. maybe it was that time in the rain where he danced in it for hours. 
maybe it was one summer day where your world just exploded in colours. 
and now it felt like it was fading back to grey.
the next day, felix came bouncing up to you.
"i got her peonies, do you think she'll like it? i told her to meet me in the garden."
"yeah, she'll definitely like it. i would've too... " you muttered the last part all to yourself, turning away and blinking rapidly as tears threatened to prick your eyes. you offered him a smile of encouragement. 
"good luck."
when lunch came, you watched as the nervous australian carried the peonies and went to the garden.
then you watched as they walked in ten minutes later, smiling bashfully and holding hands like schoolchildren in love. 
because they were.
you went home, not even bothering to call in sick. you just grabbed your bag and went home. you would deal with the consequences later. 
your heart hurt.
you were numb.
you were hollow.
you were crying.
you hated everything.
the next few days were spent at home. you called in sick. felix texted you countless times but you ignored him.
lixie&lt;3
y/nie?
where r u?
she accepted!!!
im so happy>.<
read at 2:03 a.m.
yeah, right. good for you. but what about me?
lixie&lt;3
...hello?
y/n?
can u please respond...
im worried...
what happened???
why didn't you come to school today??
read at 3:46 p.m.
you turned off your phone then turned over and cried again. you hated this. why did you have to fall for him in the first place?
finally, after four days of missed calls, texts, and school, you had to go back. its not like you had a choice anyways. you missed your parents. they lived overseas though, so you lived alone. but you really couldn't continue living like this for the rest of your life, even if you wanted to.
"y/nie!!!" felix exclaimed, running up to you. "why didn't you respond to my texts? are you okay? it's unlike you..."
"im sorry lix, i was just under the weather. im ok." you offered him a tight lipped smile. "congrats by the way." you closed your locker door and rushed off before he could ask you anything more.
"huh? thats unlike her... why is she acting so weird lately?" 
and so you avoided him, as much as you could. you kept your conversations short and brief, not talking to him as much as possible, and even switching seats to sit far away from him. you watched his hurt face the day he walked in and saw you sitting somewhere else, but then cheering up as areum sat next to him. you watched as he laughed and held hands, ate tteokbokki and ramen with her in the cafeteria. that should've been me.
but honestly, it did nothing to fill the felix-sized hole in your heart.
you drifted apart. he barely texted you now, barely said hi to you, barely even saw you in the hallways anymore. 
then exams were finished, and graduation started to roll around. 
you watched as they attended prom and twirled around on the dance floor giggling.
you watched as they broke up on the doorstep of his dorms, watching as felix's face fell when she dumped him for another guy.
you didn't have the heart to tell him i told you so.
so you busied yourself in your exams, earning a scholarship to your dream university. felix tried reaching out to you several times to rekindle your old friendship, but you would always politely decline, preferring to be detached instead of going through more heartbreak.
you still loved him, but the once burning passion had now been reduced to a soft flicker every now and then, sparking ever so slightly whenever you saw him in the corridors. your own felix-shaped hole in your heart hadn't decreased over the years, but your heart became bigger, expanding so that other people could fit in it. the hole would always be there, but at least there was space for healing.
you turned around in the backseat of your friends' car to see the campus you had once called home fading away into the distance and felix along with it.
goodbye, the wind whispered.
"happiness looks good on you, lix. i hope you make the best of it."
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planefood · 6 months
Text
Autism and Isolation, discussing my experience and my characters
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I think i've said here before that my robot characters represent my experience growing up disabled where I live. My characters being robots specifically were made to represent feelings of being made to feel less human in some way due to it. While all my characters in that story are on the spectrum and represent different parts of my experience, I used Mikey as the cover of this post because he represents a certain part of myself that makes me incredibly attached to him (there's a reason I say I like writing him so much, despite him not being the main protagonist). He's the part of me that understands I need help with things but is too afraid to ask leaving me in horrible positions, he's the part of me who screams in public when I feel trapped, he's the part of me that could probably never live by myself, he's the part of me who's scared and vulnerable. Among other things. But also he's the part of me who, like many of my peers, feels isolated in everyday spaces and autistic spaces alike due to peoples perceptions of what autism "should" be, these same people welcome fidget toys and stimming with open arms turn around and think its okay to call me the r slur or infantalise me or make fun of until I cry. But I only cry because I thought i'd be welcomed in those spaces with my autistic peers and I cry because I told my younger self it would get better and people would be nicer to us once we were an adult with like minded people. These same people who, despite being open and proud about supporting neurodiversity still think its okay to use the word autistic as an insult against me. I feel like while people appear so much more accepting of disabled people with these small gestures than I was when I was growing up, I still feel like an outsider in these spaces but this time it feels like I've hit a wall. Like a, "who will support me if the people who are meant to don't?" it leads to a lot of insecurity and self loathing, it makes me feel like I'm not autistic in the "right way" and there's just something wrong with me as a person. I wrote these into Mikey, which makes him seem like he has a 'thin skin' to people like Tandy. Mikey, in my story, is often left behind or teased by other characters in my story even the ones who are also on the spectrum. They also struggle with their own battles with facing ableism and self hatred due to it but don't realise the first step to tackling that is unpacking how they treat others around them. You'll never be able to love your true authentic autistic self if you throw ableist rhetoric at people around you. That includes saying shit like "I'm autistic and I don't act like that guy does whats their excuse" or "I'm not making fun of them because they're autistic they just act weird" I'm low support needs autistic, I've seen how people treat high support needs autistic people and its even more sickening, other low support needs autistic people like to pretend they don't exist or throw them under the bus to make themselves more appealing to ableists: "See autistic people don't actually act like that, support me because I can mask" or even trying to say autism isn't a disability. My characters and writing while being a representation of myself being disabled is also a scathing criticism of the cruelty I see in the world at large, the cruelty I see in other people in ND and disabled communities and the cruelty I see within myself. I get scared about my future with how people treat me, but when I have characters I can write these struggles into it makes it a little easier. I know there's people who love me for who I am and there's people out there who love you guys for who you are too.
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Note
aita for telling someone they're a horrible person and making them relapse?
trigger warning: self-harm, suicide(?)
so im, like many teenagers online, an avid participant of fandom spaces and my current favorite is genshin impact. if you've ever interacted with the genshin fandom you may guess where this is going but i happened to find myself liking a ship that is the big nono ship in this fandom (aka the incest ship, kaeluc) but since i mostly stick to my space and don't really interact with anyone that doesn't already have content of this ship on their account id never gotten into any hot water over it.. until recently.
this person, ill call them rick, suddenly liked a bunch of my (non-ship related) posts. normal interaction, i didn't think anything of if and moved on. (i didn't even notice at the time, but they unliked all of the posts before what happened next, i assume as they realized i was a proshipper and didn't want to associate with me.) next thing i know, the same user is in my askbox, sending me the most vile, hate filled messages i have ever seen.
ok... no biggie. i delete the asks, block them and move on with my life. but it doesn't stop. i had never in my whole life received hate online, but now for the first time ever, i had a dedicated hater, sending me anonymous asks at all times of the day. death threats, dox threats, telling me to kill myself, calling me a degenerate and all that, all with the same consistent writing style. now, one could say that maybe this wasn't rick, and maybe not even all the same person but i really feel like this is the only reasonable explanation considering i have like 6 followers and my most famous post has 3 notes. i don't think im important enough to have that many haters.
so, i did the only thing i could think to do: turned off anon asks. then the asks started coming from random throwaway accounts. ok...turned off asks. then it was dms. turned those off too. THE FUCKING COMMENT SECTIONS OF MY POSTS.
dedication isn't enough to describe this. at this point it's actually becoming distressing to me and im considering closing my whole account cause i just wanna get away from all this. im 16, i don't have the mental capacity to spend all day policing my social media because someone wants me to die for liking fictional incest.
so i very reluctantly unblock rick and send them a dm. i very gently ask if they are the person who has been sending me asks/dms/etc and if they are, if they could please stop because it's become genuinely distressing to me and i just want to be silly on a website. they block me.
alright, im now out of options. everything on my profile is blocked at this point and i don't even want to post anything else so i just kind of leave the account behind for a while. when i come back, i discover that someone HACKED into the account and defaced the whole thing (changed pfp, deleted posts etc etc) so now im genuinely bummed. i go to rick's profile and guess who has been unblocked? i ask them if they can please answer my question. they don't answer but instead tell me i deserve everything ive gotten and i should choke for all they care.
i tell them they're a terrible person and go absolutely off the rails like the dumb, upset teenager i am. i didn't say anything particularly horrible (mostly i just tell them about how awful they've made me feel over fictional shit that really doesn't matter and how i just wanted peace) but i definetely wouldn't like to receive a message like that. and rick didn't either, because they blocked me.
well, since im sure you're wondering where this comes in, here's where i kind of feel like an asshole:
i continued to stalk rick's account on a different blog (because i was bitter. ok?) and they've been posting about how they relapsed into self harm because of a message they received from a stranger and how they've been crying non-stop and this is the worst relapse they've had in years and etc etc and i just got this pit in my stomach. this person's bio says they're 15! i don't want to ever be the reason a fifteen year old is hurting themselves! i've been feeling like a piece of shit ever since (esp since i also deal with sh) and i just feel like the worse person ever. i honestly don't know if i was just acting like anyone else and this was an unfortunate consequence or if i need to go pray for god to forgive my sins or something.
aita?
What are these acronyms?
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galvanizedfriend · 7 months
Note
HIII if you don’t mind sharing, what are your fav klaroline fics? New and old, I’m in need of new reads 🙏
I'm probably not the best person to be doing new fic recs. 🥲 I have sadly not been reading that much Klaroline myself these days. When I do read fic, it's for other stuff. So my recs are either old or new-ish. 😂 But hopefully you can find something to your liking that haven't read yet here.
Buckle up because I took my sweet time with this list, nonnie.
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. Inertia Overcome by @avari20
The first KC fanfic I remember reading the reason why I finally got pulled into the fandom after years of watching TVD as a reasonable spectator (so rly, if you guys can't stand to see me around anymore after all this time, it's this fic's fault for being so good). Honestly one of this fandom's statement works. If you haven't read it yet, please do.
. Timeless by @marvelouskatie
Same as the above. One of the most iconic KC fics of all time imho. The canon AU to end all canon AU. When I first decided to come out of the shadows and create a tumblr and actually start interacting with folks, this was the first fic that was recced to me. I was very grateful then, and now I'm here to pass this knowledge on.
. Picturesque by @supernutellastuff
Honestly of the sweetest, most heartwarming fics I've ever read! It's a human AU that's a How I Met Your Mother sort of adaptation, and honestly the first time I've ever enjoyed HIMYM. I love a good ensemble fic and this is just it! Supernutella is so talented.
. Quiet Light by @definedareasofuncertainty
This fic was WRITTEN FOR ME because of how much I pestered my friend Luiza about Carolijah and this will forever feel like a trophy to my heart. 🥰 It made me feel ALL THE FEELINGS. I hated Caroline, I loved Caroline, I loved my baby Elijah, I hated him, I also hated Klaus (he's such a fucking asshole omfg), but then the end was just DHAGHDDASAS!! You think you're in for a certain kind of story and it turns out to be so much more. It is, deep down, about the brothers, how selfish they are, how they can hurt each other more than anyone, but how they love one another above anything else, even when they want to kill each other (and fall in love with their brother's girl!!!). It's beautiful, like everything Luiza writes, and it genuinely made me cry.
. long limbs and frozen swim by @definedareasofuncertainty
I saw a discussion the other day about how whoever wrote this fic JUST GOT IT, and I have to say I completely agree with the person who made that comment. Luiza just NAILS Caroline's grief and loneliness after her mother's death, how isolating and gut-wrenching it is. Klaus being the person who finds her, who knows exactly what to say without her ever having to spell it out, the one who can truly see her, is so honest too. This fic is sensitive and absolutely beautiful. Luiza's writing is perfection and this is for sure one of my all-time favorites.
. Whisper to me, Help me remember by @lalainajanes
This story reimagines the plot with the "villains" of TO S3 in a way that proves my point that the premise of that season was good, but execution was absolute crap. All of the potential the De Martels had to be incredible antagonists was completely destroyed at the hands of the show writers - but explored to perfection by Laine's much more capable hands. Klaus is freed after 10 years in captivity to find that Caroline had been working with Tristan this whole time in order to take him down - except something is not quite right about that. While you're at it, please read all of Laine's fics! It's a delight.
. Into the Woods by @jinxedwood
I wept when I read this because it's the post-TO canon fic I didn't even know I needed. Caroline's search for a way to stop her twins' merger ends up leading her to someone who's been watching over her on the Other Side. 😭 I thought I'd always rather live in denial when it came to how TO ended, but this fic made my heart so full! Also, jinxedwood's use of fae mythology here was incredible.
. All I Need by @euvixen
This story is HOT. It taught me things about the werewolf AU universe I was not prepared to learn, but I am a much happier person after reading it. It's a canon mates AU that will leave you 🥵🥵🥵🥵 I speak as though the story was merely about the smut, but it's actually much more than that. A TVD S3 reimagine of sorts that is incredibly satisfying. That's my favorite season of TVD, but this is still even better.
. the birth and death of the day by @little-miss-sunny-daisy
Anyone who's known me for a some time knows how this fic was my entire personality for a while there. I'm obsessed with Kelly's writing, and I have this fic on a freaking pedestal. I first started reading it when it was on a six years hiatus, and I was *so* into it I didn't even bother me that it might never get updated because it was so good I was just happy I'd found it. But then my silly comments inspired Kelly to come back to it, finish it, and it has honestly been my greatest accomplishment as a part of this fandom because this is a masterpiece. It's a TVD/Supernatural crossover where Caroline is a step-sister to the Superbros. It's truly, truly epic, with beautiful writing. This could genuinely be a show. It's amazing, just read it.
. this is a harvest by @highgaarden
This, right here, is the perfect Klaroline-within-canon story. This is the story that put my revolt to rest and gave my spirit some much deserved peace where those two are concerned. This is exactly what canon should've been like. I'm not even joking, this is IT. If you'd asked me what I thought the perfect Klaroline development should be like I probably would've said something very vague because I couldn’t explain it, I’m not that great or creative a writer, but now I can just show you this story and let you bask in the amazingness of a fantastic read that will not only keep you thoroughly entertained, but will also be the answer to all the questions you didn't even know you had.
. Paradise Lost by Borzoi
When i grow up, I want to learn how to write like Borzoi. All of their fics are incredible novella-like reads. It's addictive. And this is probably my favorite (it varies though, sometimes I'm in a Parisian Deal era). What happens after Klaus and Caroline sleep together in 5x11, and how they eventually find their way back to each other. It's just one of those stories that you can't stop reading after you start. It's so rich, so deep, so perfectly IC. One of those fics to end all fics.
. The Stubborn Grace of Being Loved Regardless by @helpless-in-sleep One of the modern day classics, if you will. This fic is such a stunning, vivid and delicate picture of Caroline's mind as she was dealing with the consequences of the abuse she suffered at the hands of Damon. She's still human, but she's probably more IC than we've seen her ever on the show when it comes to this. The bond she forms with Klaus is truly incredible too, and speaks a lot of how the two of them really do have a lot in common (even with Caroline still as a human), but it's really the Caroline study part of the story that touches me. The writing is absolutely beautiful as well.
. it takes a while to settle down by theviolinist
This story is a punch to your stomach, but it is PERFECTION in 8k words. It's hot, it's bittersweet, it's SO in character and, in my head, I kinda like to pretend that this is what happened before Caroline married Stefan. lol
. Wanderlust by @bellemorte180 Anybody who was a part of fandom around the time this story was being published can tell you how much of an EVENT it was. There were discussion groups about the mystery. It was so entertaining. Erica's attention to detail and how she wove the little clues throughout the chapters made this a genuine thriller. I particularly some of the side-characters here. It's honestly another fandom staple I think everyone should read.
--
In terms of newer fics that I can rec you, I have two that are on my TBR. One of them is a WIP that I've been slowly going through, and the other one I know was recently finished.
. make them bow by @stars-and-darkness
This was recced to me by two friends recently and I started reading it a while back and thought it was incredible! I have sadly been awful with keeping up with stuff, but just based on the raving reviews and the five chapters I read, I fully believe it to be just as awesome as it seems to be. The writing was so good, and I was just in love with Klaus' voice in this story. It was so reminescent of early-days TVD Klaus, which is by far my favorite Klaus of all. Sexy and dangerous and so smooth. I loved it! Need to get back to it.
. Wolf Club by @Radioactive79
Listen, if you like kid fics, this is absolutely for you. The whole story is narrated by an eight-year-old OC, the daughter of Ray Sutton, the first werewolf Klaus kills when he's trying to start his mass-production of hybrids. She's a little wolf herself, and a while little thing who was subjected to her fair share of child trauma. Klaus has no idea what to do with her, but ends up taking her with him as continues on his journey, and ends up forging a bond with the little girl. I cannot tell you how delicious this story is. It has Klaroline, yes, but for me the little girl is the absolute star of the company. I usually hate OCs, especially children, in fics, but this one is AMAZING. Seriously. The way this story is written is glorious. I can't recommend it enough.
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goodluckclove · 21 days
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Hey It's Me!
How are you? I've realized that I've taken up a habit of just forcing my way into the inboxes of other writers, so it would probably be helpful if I had a pinned intro.
I'm Clove Gardener! I'm a writer-type! I've written for fifteen years, and in that time I've made novels, produced plays, published short stories, written a column in an online arts website, ghostwritten a bunch of nonsense, and worked as a copywriter for a miserable marketing company. You can say I'm a working writer, and boy business is okay, I guess.
My new job is self publishing, specifically starting with the first book in the Songbird Elegies, coming out this summer. I actually started this blog to market, and to an extent I'm still kind of doing that sometimes. But there's a chance that's now the side-hustle to my true passion of directly befriending and talking with struggling word-handlers (writers) until they are able to properly handle their words (write).
A while back I went as far as to give my real email address to the internet so you can either send me what you're currently writing or like hack my accounts or whatever. If you chose to do the former, I would respond with praise, stray insights, and honest curiosity about your work. Guess what? I'm still doing that. But in the name of maybe not giving too much away, I've changed the email to the very classy [email protected]. If you send your current writing that you need a shot of motivation on, send it there and I will read it with my eyes and heart. I will talk about it more than you are probably prepared to handle.
My inbox is also fully open! If you reblog one of my writing call-out posts and I spot some nonsense about how you don't think you can write or share your writing, I will probably message you and ask why. But if you want to message me directly, skip the small talk and get straight to business. I'm down to party. I'm also down to give insights on what I know of indie/trad publishing, as well as starting a career in professional, non-fiction writing. Both technical and lifestyle! The latter makes much less money than the former, but the former also isn't as boring as you might think!
So yeah - I'm Clover Gardener. Read my books when they come out if you want. Scroll through and you'll find excerpts from what I'm working on. If you draw fanart I will cry and die and pee myself in that order. I love you.
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Wait; I don’t remember much about some arcs, but the foxy the pirate arc was fun; if you’re willing to do anything with this it would be much appreciated!❤️
It’s about on child lucky/reader during the foxy the pirates where they take the reader during one of the games, trying to win her back. Since she’s a child and has no idea what’s going on, she starts crying and stuff, but once they win her back that she’s so clingy and won’t let go of them to the point where she just holds onto on their legs when they win her back and if they lose again; she starts fighting tooth and nails to not let go.
Or something else. I just want to read more child lucky stuff if you have any! Thank you for reading, have a good day author!
I keep telling myself that I’m not going to spoil Lucky Break… but y’all keep giving me these plot bunnies and I keep caving instantly
When I wrote Get Back Here! I’d only imagined the deaging to be temporary, but now this ask has me thinking about it being permanent and now Lucky has been factory reset into a four year old. It’s a very interesting dynamic to think about. I’m gonna have to write about this some more… I’m hereby calling this the Little Lucky AU
I’ve written something like this about the Foxy Pirates before actually! It was just a short drabble, here, but it’s got a similar vibe. The davy back fights do not mesh well with yanderes, and considering that normal, regular-ass Zoro suggested just killing them and leaving in the anime, I think I underplayed how dangerous yandere Zoro would be tbh
Ok so into the spoilers for Lucky Break. They would not get Lucky at all. Period. Why? Because they couldn’t have come in at a worse point in the story. Don’t get me wrong, the Straw Hats wouldn’t take it well at any point, but by this point in Lucky Break they are unhinged. Skypeia is a really bad time for Lucky, and it really messes with adult Lucky so child Lucky is going to be severely traumatized by it. Enel winds up being the tipping point for the Straw Hats going from low-key yandere to full on yandere. Everything post Skypeia takes on a darker tone to match it and the yandere elements of the story go from subtle to very intense.
By the time they get to Long Ring Long Land, Lucky is looking like she got thrown down a flight of stairs, electrocuted, and strangled. This is concerning to see on an adult, and is horrifying to see on a literal preschooler. The Foxy pirates aren’t even really being malicious when they try to take her, they’re genuinely concerned (and also suffering under the effects of Lucky’s amulet which becomes much more potent post Skypeia). They have a team meeting beforehand and are all like “so we’re gonna take the baby and leave the rest of them behind, right?” and no one disagrees.
But needless to say, all of the Straw Hats are on edge and fucking feral so this concern is not taken well. This was supposed to be a drabble, but as per usual I have no self control and wrote a whole ass chapter basically.
3.9k words
Resisting the urge to pick at your scabs was hard on a good day, but when you were feeling sick to your stomach with nerves, it felt impossible not to do. Not wanting to make Chopper upset, you move your hands to grasp at the brim of Luffy’s hat. Partially to keep your hand busy, and partially to keep it from falling over your eyes again.
You guess it made sense that they wouldn’t let you participate, but that didn’t make having to be separated from your friends any less nerve wracking. Luffy had tried to bring you onto his boat regardless, only relenting when Nami bitterly admitted that they had a point and you would be safer on land. 
Terrified at the idea of being alone, you immediately began to tear up and protest, but Luffy made a compromise with you. Since the race was going to be so dangerous, he needed someone to look after his hat and keep it safe. So, if you could be brave about being by yourself for a little while, he would entrust this task to you. Part of you still wasn’t happy about this, but you didn’t want to let Luffy down, so you put on a brave face and accepted. 
Now you were left to sit on the cliffside overlooking the start of the race, waiting for it to begin so it could be over already. At least not everyone else will be in the games after this. From your perch, you could see your friends frantically scanning through the crowd. Oh, they were probably looking for you.
Standing up, you maintained your hold on Luffy’s treasure with one hand and waved to them with the other. Sanji was the first to spot you and pointed you out to everyone else. They all swiveled their heads in your direction, and the relief on their faces was palpable. Everyone waved back at you, and Luffy stood up, rather shakily on his raft, to call out to you, “Don’t worry, Lucky! We’ll win this no problem!”
There were some chuckles coming from the audience, and the weird looking announcer guy felt the need to comment on this, “Oh! What’s this? The Straw Hat’s captain thinks they’ll win this no problem? A bold claim to make from someone who has never seen the might of! The! Foxy! Piiiiraaates!”
You winced at the sheer volume and noise of feedback, not able to resist the urge to cover your ears. Luffy’s hat fell over your eyes, blocking out the view but doing nothing to block out the noise. You already didn’t feel good, and that was not helped by the roar of applause and cheers coming from the crowd. 
The breath lodged in your throat. The onslaught of noise felt like it was coming at you from all angles, melding together and ultimately amping up into an obnoxious ringing in your ears. Your knees buckled, making you fall onto your behind as you struggled to force yourself to remember how to breathe.
It’s too much! It’s way too much! It’s-
“Hey!” Two familiar hands fell onto your shoulders, snapping you out of the downwards spiral you were falling victim to. One of the hands moves to lift the brim of the hat just enough for you to make eye contact with your best friend. He smiled, and just seeing it was enough to soothe you a little, “It’s going to be okay! Don’t listen to them, we’ve got this!”
“Y-Yeah, of course you do,” you choked out.
Luffy brought you in for a quick but tight hug, smushing your face into his red shirt, “That’s it! We’ll be back before you know it!”
“Luffy! If you’re not in your boat by the start of the race you will be disqualified!” The announcer shouted, causing you to flinch again.
His grip on you tightened, and while you couldn’t see it, you just knew that he was scowling. His neck snapped towards the announcer furiously, “I will be! Stop being so loud about it!” Gently, Luffy pulled you away from him, offering another smile. His voice was quieter than usual, “Don’t worry about it, we’ll beat them and be out of here before you know it.” 
With a quick pat to your head, he rocketed himself back to his raft, nearly flipping it over in the process. While the exchange had eased your fears a little, there was still an overhanging discomfort about the situation. What would happen if they didn’t win? Who would those other pirates take? You shook your head. No. You’re not gonna think about it! Luffy will win, you just know it.
The distinct sound of grass crunching beneath feet made your shoulders tense up. Hesitantly, you turned to identify who was coming up behind you. It was two people. One of them was the captain, you think Luffy said his name was Split-Head? Yeah that sounds right. The other one was some big monkey-looking guy. You’re pretty sure his name was Hamburger, a funny name but who are you to judge?
Split-Head grinned at you, but it was not providing the warmth and comfort that Luffy’s gave you. It reminded you of a sleazy salesman that your mother yelled at in the mall one time for being too pushy. Maybe he’ll go away if you ignore him? You hope so.
“Why hello there, young lady! Your captain didn’t include your name on the roster, can you tell me it?” Split-Head was now crouched down next to you, much too close for comfort.
You kept your head down and shrugged, “I’m not supposed to talk to strangers.”
This didn’t deter him in the slightest, “Aww, come on! You won’t make friends that way, kid. You can trust me! I’m captain Foxy of the Foxy pirates!” From your peripherals you could see him puffing out his chest in pride. His name is Foxy? Split-Head is more fitting in your humble opinion. He must think really high of himself. “There, now I’m not a stranger!”
It seems like this guy isn’t going away any time soon. You dug your heels into the dirt anxiously, wishing he would leave you alone. “Yeah, well… you’re still strange,” you mumbled.
Split-Head-Foxy let out an offended gasp, then fell to his knees with a gloomy aura looming over him. Wow. He’s pushy, full of himself, weird, AND dramatic. You rolled your eyes and took a decisive step away from him, looking out at the ocean as the race finally started. 
It was then that it dawned on you that this race went around the whole island, meaning that you’re going to have to run to try and keep up. Emphasis on the try. Without a word to the two pirates bothering you, you ran after your friends’ boats. Both of your hands were tightly grasping the hat on your head to prevent it from flying off. Sure, there was a string attached to it around your neck, but you didn’t want to risk it.
Immediately, it became obvious that you were not going to be able to keep up. Even if you were at your best, you wouldn’t be fast enough. But with how injured you were, everything was sore and the pain of your muscles pulling on your scabs made your run more like a trot. The Straw Hats’ boats were getting farther and farther away, and you could feel frustrated tears prickling at your eyes.
There was the sound of… galloping? Yeah, galloping behind you. Pretty soon, Foxy pulled up next to you riding Hamburger like a horse. Man, this guy just keeps getting weirder.
“Looks like you need a ride there, kid. Why don’t you hop on so we can watch this race together, hm?” Foxy held out his hand to you, smiling smugly. Memories of your preschool teacher telling the class to never get in a stranger’s car came to mind. A monkey man isn’t exactly a car, but you think the same idea applies here.
You shook your head vigorously, “No, I don’t wanna go with you.”
Foxy’s smile fell, and his hand drooped. He plastered it back on his face after a moment, “Kid, you’re not going to be able to keep up, just come with me. I’ve got some candy! I’ll give you some if you hop on!”
A stranger offering you candy to get in their vehicle was another thing your teacher warned you about. Yeah, this was definitely a bad guy you shouldn’t talk to. You doubled your effort to run a little faster to put some distance between you and them, “No! Leave me alone!”
They sped up, closing the gap in seconds. Instead of saying anything, Hamburger simply reached out and plucked you right off your feet then dropped you onto Foxy. Naturally, you started thrashing and screaming, “Let go of me! Put me down! Stranger danger!”
Hamburger laughed at your terror, “What a feisty child.”
“Quit laughing Hamburg, she’s kicking up a storm,” he was frantically trying to get a good hold on you. “Calm down! We’re not going to hurt you, we’re help- OW!” You managed to land a good kick to his face. Despite that, he was able to hold onto you. He spun you so that you were facing away from him.
His hand grabbed your face and turned it to gaze out at the ocean, “Look! We’re caught up now!”
True to his word, you could see the contestants. Your face scrunched up in confusion, not seeing Luffy and Sanji’s boat anywhere. Or Zoro and Chopper’s. Were they that far ahead? Yeah, that was definitely it, had to be. You could still see Usopp, Nami, and Robin at least. Seeing them made you feel a little calmer.
“See? We were just trying to help you out,” his smug grin was back. “Now how about you tell me your name?”
As much as you didn’t want to, he probably wouldn’t shut up about it until you did, “It’s Lucky.”
“Lucky? Is that supposed to be a nickname or something?” “It’s my name! You asked and I told you, stop bugging me about it,” you grumbled. You want to get down, but you get the feeling they wouldn’t let you do that. At least you get to follow the race now.
Foxy fished around in his pocket and pulled out some brightly colored objects, “Here, I bet you want some candy, don’t you?”
It’s bad enough that you’re riding with him, you’re not gonna take any candy from this weirdo, “No thank you, I don’t want any.”
He sighed and stuffed it back in his pocket. You hoped this would be the end of his chattering. Unfortunately, it didn’t appear that luck was on your side today. Or this week, really. Foxy held out your arm, scrutinizing all the scabbed over burns on it, “How did this happen, Lucky?”
“It’s none of your business, I don’t wanna talk about it mister,” you huffed. You didn’t want to even think about that ever again. About him. About how cold and uncaring his eyes were. About how much it hurt. Your shoulders started to shake and your lip trembled.
“Whoa, hey it’s okay! You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to!” Foxy brought you in for a hug, but you really didn’t want it. You squirmed and tried to get away from him, but he wasn’t letting you.
“What’s this?! The last remaining Straw Hat boat has broken into first place with incredible speed!” The announcer shouted.
Wait. Last remaining?! How was there only one boat left?! You looked out to see Usopp, Nami, and Robin barreling towards the finish line. They were going to win! They needed to if they were the only ones left.
Foxy cursed under his breath, “Hamburg, you need to hurry to the end goal!”
Hamburger only nodded and sped up. You were kinda impressed by how fast he was able to go. Despite being pestered by these two so much, you were smiling and kicking your feet in excitement. They were going to win this race! And then they would win the other two races, too!”
A little ways before the finish line, Hamburg came to a halt, and Foxy hopped off. You took the opportunity to scramble off him, too. You rushed to the cliff and called out, “You can do it! You’re gonna win!” If they heard you, they didn’t react.
“I wouldn’t count your chickens before they hatch, Lucky,” Foxy stated ominously. He held out his hands and made some weird shapes with them, like he was trying to make shadow puppets. All you could do was eye him curiously, trying to figure out what that was supposed to mean. You don’t have any chickens, why is he talking about counting them? Weird. 
His fingers were pointed right at your friends and then he said something about a slow-slow beam. Your friends, who were previously rocketing towards the finish, abruptly slowed down to a crawl, seemingly unable to move. Your jaw dropped as the other boat with the pointy nosed girl on it took the lead and then, much to your horror, won the race.
You whipped around to Foxy, who was looking quite proud of himself, “What did you do?!”
“I put my devil fruit to good use, that’s what! I can slow down anything with my slow-slow beam.”
“That’s cheating! You’re a cheater!” You stomped your foot angrily, pointing an accusing finger at him.
“No it’s not. I said there were no rules in this race, didn’t I? That means I’m allowed to help my team from the sidelines if I want.” He tried to pat your head, but you slapped his hand away.
“But that’s not fair!”
“Life isn’t fair, kid, you should get used to it and be a good sport about your team losing,” Foxy had the audacity to try and scold you for your behavior. Who does he think he is?!
“I hate you! Stupid Split-Head!” You kicked his shin before running off to try and find your friends, you need to tell them about this. 
Due to how large Foxy’s crew was, it was difficult to find one of your friends. Especially when everyone was trying to get you to stop and talk to them for some reason. Finally, though, you spotted the red shirt that you would recognize in a heartbeat. 
“Luffy!” 
That catches his attention, alright. He whirls around and then runs to meet you. Knowing the drill, you lift your arms so he can pick you up. He does just that, holding you out in front of him, “There you are!” His clothes were wet and water was dripping out of his hair, he must have fallen into the ocean at some point.
Your first order of business was to return his prized possession to him. You pulled the hat off your head and placed it onto his, albeit a bit crooked, “I kept your hat safe for you!”
“I knew you could, good job Lucky!” Luffy pulled you in to balance you on his hip and used his free hand to ruffle your hair.
Now onto the big thing, “Luffy, that Split-Head guy is a cheater! He’s got a devil fruit that makes stuff super slow and he used it on Usopp, Nami, and Robin! He uses his fingers to do it!”
“Is that what happened?!” The grin he was previously sporting dropped and he looked surprised.
You nodded, “Mmhm! I saw it myself!”
Luffy mimicked your nod, humming in thought, “Well now that we know about it, we can look out for it in the next game. We’ll figure out how to beat it, don’t worry!”
You looked away, picking at his shirt nervously, “Are you sure? You said the same thing about winning the race, but…” 
He tensed up from that, “Hey, come on! Have some faith in me, in all of us. We’ll win the rest of the matches for sure!” Luffy knelt down to put you on the ground, “Now how about you go stand with the others, okay?”
“Okay,” you didn’t really want to leave him, but you needed to listen to him. He probably had important captain stuff to do. It only took a second to spot some of the others. They weren’t far away and were watching your interaction with Luffy. You hurried over, squeezing yourself in between Robin and Sanji.
Sanji dropped onto his knees and brought you into a tight hug. He was also soaking wet. “Were you okay being on your own, princess? No one bothered you, did they?”
“I’m okay. Some people did bother me, but I gave them the slip after I kicked one of them in the shins,” you declared proudly.
Sanji’s face pinched in fury, “Who?”
“Um,” you took a second to remember their names again. “Oh, Foxy and Hamburger!”
“Hamburger? Do you mean Hamburg?” Robin asked, stifling a chuckle. Oh yeah, Foxy did call him that, didn’t he?
“Yeah, that. They kept trying to talk to me and made me come with them to watch the race. I didn’t want to, but Hamburger- I mean Hamburg, picked me up and made me come with. Oh, and Foxy tried to give me candy but I didn’t take any.”
Sanji was scowling and looked ready to go on a rampage. Forcing himself to take a deep breath, he let you go and stood up while digging his cigarettes and lighter out of his pockets. He was muttering about caving their heads in later.
The announcer and captain were standing on a stage and said that it was time to announce who they were taking for their victory. Your heart sank and you clung onto Robin’s leg nervously. Who were they going to steal? Would Luffy really be able to win them back? What if they won all three rounds and stole three of your friends? Robin pet your hair reassuringly.
“We have decided on who is becoming a Foxy pirate! It is none other than,” there was a pause for dramatic effect. Your stress was climbing with every second. The announcer took a deep breath and finally finished the sentence, “Lucky!”
Everyone fell silent, but for only a second. Then chaos erupted.
“Absolutely not!” Nami shrieked.
“You said she was too young to participate!” Sanji interjected.
“We said she was too young to participate in the fights, not that she was off the table for this part,” Foxy pointed out with a smirk.
“She’s four years old! What could you possibly want from her?!” Sanji was already mad before the announcement, but now he was furious.
“That doesn’t matter, you need to hand her over now, lest you want to break the rules,” Foxy reminded him.
Sanji was distracted from his argument as he heard a sob behind him. From you. Robin was quick to scoop you up, cradling you in her arms and trying to calm you down. “Now look what you did! She’s crying!” Sanji barked at them.
“I don’t wanna go, I don’t wanna!” You wailed, clinging onto Robin like your life depended on it. Which, as far as you were concerned, it did.
“Pick someone else, Lucky isn’t going to go with you,” Luffy spoke. His tone was cool, but the words were sharp.
“Don’t tell me what to do, straw hat. I’m making the rules here, not you. She’s a pirate, is she not? She needs to learn not to be such a crybaby. Besides, once she’s with us she’ll see how nice we are!” Foxy crowed proudly. 
“This is cruel, she’s just a child!” Robin chimed in, clutching you to her chest even tighter.
“Quit complaining so much, it’s not like we’re going to hurt her any worse than she’s already been hurt. We’re probably better suited for protecting her than you are,” the pointy-nosed woman was now approaching you and Robin, looking annoyed. “Now give her to me. Come here, Lucky! Do you want to go get some cotton candy with me?”
Her reaching for you only made you scream louder, “NO NO NO! I’m not going!” She tried to grab you anyways, but Robin was quick to put a stop to that. Arm sprouted from the woman’s body and immobilized her. 
Robin backed up by several paces, “Get away from her, you’re just going to make this worse!”
At this point, tears were pouring down your face and you felt like you couldn’t breathe despite how frantically your lungs were working. You coughed and hacked between hysteric breaths and sobs. Your heart was pounding out of your chest and your head hurt. They were going to take you away. You were going to be taken away from your friends again. Just like in Skypeia.
They were going to steal you.
They were going to hurt you.
“Don’t let me get taken away again!” You wailed at the top of your lungs.
Foxy scoffed, “This is getting ridiculous! Fine, if you won’t give her to us then I’ll tak-”
His sentence was ended abruptly by Luffy’s fist connecting with his face. A sickening crunch cut through the air. Before he even hit the ground, Luffy’s hand grabbed hold of his jacket and pulled him close. As soon as he was in range, Luffy was on him. 
He climbed on top of him and as Foxy was raising his hands to defend himself, Luffy grabbed them and snapped his fingers before he could put his devil fruit to use. Then Luffy began wailing on him, furious, raw screams erupting from his throat.
Everyone was frozen in place, shocked at the display, but then the crowd rushed at Luffy to save their captain. They couldn’t even get close, though. Zoro leapt into action, cutting them down like paper. You weren’t able to see anything else after that, as Robin snapped out of her own state of shock and buried your face in her neck. “Don’t watch this, Lucky,” she whispered.
A hand landed on your head, gently stroking your hair. It feels like Sanji. He confirmed this by speaking lowly, “Robin, get Nami and Chopper and head back to the ship. Prepare it to set sail, it looks like we’re not going to be finishing these games after all.” He peaked around her shoulder to be able to look you in the eyes, “Don’t worry Lucky. We will never let you get taken away again, I promise.”
Many Foxy pirates swarmed around you ready to attack, only to get sent flying by Sanji. He didn’t even look back at you and Robin, “Go! I’ll protect you so just focus on getting the others and going back to the ship.”
“Right, let’s go Lucky,” Robin held you securely in her arms and ran. “Navigator! Doctor! We’re leaving, follow me!” They didn’t need to be told twice, cutting through the crowd to run in tandem with you and Robin. “We need to free the ship and get it ready to sail!”
“Should be easy enough,” Nami said. She caught your eye and switched to a softer tone, “When we get back to the ship, I need you to go hide in our room until one of us comes to get you, okay?”
“O-Okay,” you sniffled pitifully. At least the tears had stopped now. You chose to nestle in closer in Robin arms for the duration of the sprint back to the Going Merry, eager to leave and for this to all be behind you.
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ohbo-ohno · 7 months
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omgomgomgomggggg u mentioned reader locked in a cage watching her stuffed bear through the bars and my mind immediately started racing. do u think when they have her locked up they sit just outside the bars teasing her with her stuffed bear shaking him around just outside her reach? taunting her and cooing when tears slide down her cheeks😭they throw a blanket over ur cage and leave u there for “puppy’s nap time” i’m actually shaking
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oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my
this is a little long one because both of these concepts have killed me and i lost control of myself
im shaking. hyperventilating. quivering. i am an unrecognizable person after reading these asks.
forced into a cage fucking GETS ME!!! noncon puppy play you will always be famous. both of my noncon/dubcon ghostsoap puppyplay things (say that five times fast) have johnny falling into a type of subspace really quickly so i haven't actually gotten to write a lot of a forced puppy reacting badly and i want to so MUCH!!! might do it with ghostsoap in a follow up to the thing i just posted honestly. it's so fucking delicious
but anyways. in this au the cage you get shoved in isn't johnny's cage, it's one they made for you so you can keep them company during their murderous free time. that means the cage is small, you-sized :( you can't sit up straight in it, can't stretch your legs out the whole way, can't even really kneel straight up. a tiny little space for a tiny little girl oh im going to be SICK
i like the idea of reader having a little nest of her own in their cabin, filled with soft things for her to relax into (and, of course, a hook for them to leash her to) so i feel like her cage in the basement is probably a little ugly. probably no blankets or pillows, shoved in the middle of the room somewhere so there's no place where you can hide (aka press yourself against the wall), leaves you exposed and vulnerable and cold. poor little puppy :( crying and sniffling and begging them not to force you in, but they just chuckle and ruffle your hair a bit, force you to your knees.
all that being said: your little bear johnny and bear simon are in the bad cage with you <3
the stuffy (im calling it a bear but fill in an animal if you'd like) is a total comfort object for you, something that has gone through every bad thing right by your side. when they fuck you, you almost always have the bear in your arms. when they force you to their torture dungeon, the bear is either in your arms or in your eyeline. maybe one of the times they hunt you simon slips the little bear into your arms while johnny is fucking you in the dirt, smirks a little when you thank him and hold it tight to your chest.
if you get really worked up from what they're doing one of them throws an old blanket over your cage. it makes everything so much worse - you can't see anything, you're left alone in this cold dark space, and you can still hear every sound of pain and the tools your kidnappers are using. but for some reason you feel more vulnerable in the dark (like a bird lol) so you go quiet, hunch down real low and squeeze your eyes shut so you can't see the bloodstains on the blanket. simon on johnny think they're helping you cause you don't sound nearly as scared when you can't see anything <3 gives them horrible ideas involving blindfolds but that's another thing
johnny keeping your bear from you. it's like the two of you want me dead. “do you wanna come out now?🥺” “you want your bear??🥺” “are you gonna be a good girl now???🥺🥺” and "teasing her with her stuffed bear shaking him around just outside her reach? taunting her and cooing when tears slide down her cheeks" like im so fucking GONE it's actually not even funny.
you get real puppy-like when they make you beg for your bear. little paws held out, eyes all big and teary, panting and wiggling around cause you want your toy so badly. simon telling you to take the stuffy with your teeth, and you whine because you don't want to bite your bear!!!! but he says johnny and i bite you all the time, puppy, if you can take it so can your bear so you finally lean forward, get a little loose hold on the stuffy's leg where johnny's holds it out
but he's so mean, because he doesn't let it go :( just smiles real big at the sight of you on your knees, little puppy toy between your teeth. go on, he'd say take it, lass. and you try!!! you tug it a little, shake your head a bit, but he won't let go!! he won't give you your bear!!!
until simon tells him to, a gruff that's enough tug o' war, johnny, she's been a good girl. hand it over. and then the stuffy is yours again, finally. you'd tuck it up right in your arms, hold it close to your chest and bury you nose in the soft fur with your eyes squeezed shut. you ignore the little coos from above you, fully throw yourself into loving on your bear
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justcallmenikki7 · 3 months
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Hi, it’s Nikki.
I’m writing this to give you all, the ones who are still here even tho I’ve been basically hiatus for a while now, with some posts here and there. You probably all, also, saw this coming, but I’m sadly done writing.
God, im crying lmao.
Anyways, I realized after constantly trying to write something, outline, everything, I couldn’t write anymore. Maybe it’s because I went through a severe abusive relationship at the beginning of April 2022 to the end of November of 2022, and it completely changed me as a person. I lost a lot of love, likes, whatever you may call it, from that relationship. It changed me, and one of the things it changed in me was my love for writing. My spark isn’t here anymore, and I’ve been trying to hold on for the last possible year and a half for you guys, but it hasn’t happened. I’m afraid of change, I’m afraid of letting go, and have a bad time of accepting the fact that i mayve grown out of a phase, you know? My love for the boys will always be there, always.
What has also caused me lots of stress, and is a sign of losing my spark, has been trying to write and come up with ideas, and creat stories for those who have messaged me privately, and I feel terrible for not being able to do that, and I hate breaking promises/not keeping my word because I wanted to make you guys happy, and I’ve failed those individuals. I’m sorry for not finishing those requests, and I’m sorry that I never actually started them because I didn’t know what to do. I wanted to make you happy, but I couldn’t get anything out and so I sat for the longest time, trying to get a good paragraph, or in a general a sentence out, but i couldn’t and I didn’t.
And I’ve sadly relapsed the other night after almost 2 years of being clean from s/h. My depression has been in the dumps, and even tho I have so many positives going on in my life and such amazing people, and an amazing partner, my mental health is deteriorating and I need to focus on myself.
I know I’ve once done a short hiatus before and came back because sometimes a small break is good to have, but sometimes all things must come to an end, and I’m officially closing my chapter with tumblr and writing for good.
I’ve made a couple of friends on here, and those friends I want to address real quickly and say my peace.
@wickizer , girl you know everything and ily
@minniepetals . My gosh, I remember reading your story String of Fate when it first came out, and I swore up and down, still today I do, that it’ll be published in the hall of fame. Despite it being on its hiatus, it’s still the best story so far. You deserve an award for your writing, and your story Cry Me A River is such an amazing masterpiece. I’ve been meaning to read it all, but life has gotten in the way and I’m so proud of you. Even tho we haven’t talked in the longest time, I’m still cheering you on, on here and outside of tumblr.
@aft3rhrs . Love, you’re amazing and I hope you take care of yourself and take time for yourself. Self love and self kindness is a priority and make yourself a priority. Your writing is beautiful and I’m glad we befriended each other. I’m cheering you on, and always will. Thank you for being a kind person.
And every other writer that I bonded with on here, I love you and will be a huge cheerleader for you. To those who I reached out to when I was still new for advice, or for me to fangirl to, thank you for being kind and helpful.
And to my followers, the ones who cheered me on to keep writing when I first joined tumblr, thank you for being kind and supportive. I love each and every single one of you. You made this place a safe place for the longest time, and I’m thankful for all of you.
I’m sorry for the longest apology and me basically dumping my issues on here, I just needed to be honest with you all. I didn’t want this to sound like a ‘poor me’ ‘feel sorry for me’ but I needed to, like I said before, be honest with you.
This is scary for me, but this is me saying goodbye.
Love forever and always, justcallmenikki7.
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beckbucket · 1 year
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♦ just following orders ♦ (jedi! reader x wrecker)
summary: when wrecker's chip activates on bracca, he lunges for you instead of one of his brothers
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warnings/tags: angst, order 66, inhibitor chip activation, choking, crying, pain all around, jedi! reader, no use of y/n, gender neutral reader
author's note: this was heavily inspired by this post by @zoeykalluss ! i haven't written in a very, very long time... but i couldn't find any satisfactory wrecker whump, so i guess i had no choice but to write it myself ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ un-beta'd, so be kind!
Ever since the painful day that your squad of troopers turned on you, you hadn’t truly felt safe. Constantly looking over your shoulder and constantly moving forward had become the routine- until you met the boys of Clone Force 99. 
You barely escaped your ship after Order 66 with your life. After a lifetime of living on Coruscant with the Jedi Order, you found yourself on shady Ord Mantell with no credits and extensive injuries. In exchange for a discreet place to sleep, you’d agreed to research missions for Cid to pursue. Your whole body constantly ached, but it was better than having to fight for scraps in the street. She never asked you to be involved in the action. That is, until Cid suggested one day that you should travel as backup with her “team”. Funnily enough, she never actually mentioned that the team was made up of clone troopers...
When you were first introduced, you nearly bolted from Cid’s bar on the spot. Somehow, the unexpectedly kind words of their largest member somehow convinced you to stay. You honestly never thought you’d ever be able to look another clone in the eyes, let alone work a mission with them. Over time, though, you came to appreciate the many quirks of the team- especially of one batcher in particular. 
Though he looked brutish, Wrecker was the most caring soul you’d ever met. He didn’t have the exceptional intellect or enhanced senses of his brothers, but Wrecker had a special gift for reading people. If you didn’t know any better, you’d think that he had a midichlorian count off the charts! His joy bled over to everyone around him. After your life as a Jedi had crumbled, you finally felt hopeful. Falling in love with him followed easily. You’d agreed to join them permanently, which led to your latest mission. 
You and the other batchers tried to get some rest, while Tech piloted the Marauder down to the surface of the junk planet. You could feel Wrecker’s large form behind you in your shared bunk, strong arms curled around you. Something in the air felt off, but it wasn’t worth disturbing anyone’s sleep over. You cracked a bleary eye, and through your blurry morning vision, you could see the other batchers safely sleeping. You nuzzled back against your partner, enjoying the few quiet moments you had before the team had to move out. After all the pain that had happened in your life, Wrecker was the one person you felt truly safe with. 
Wrecker’s force signature was bright and warm, a constant anchor in the back of your mind. But since you dropped into Bracca's orbit… something felt strange in your connection. While Tech had done extensive research on the Jedi order, none of the boys really understood what it meant for you to be connected with the Force. You didn’t want to panic the team based on a hunch, so you tried to keep your feelings to yourself. Those days, with all the suffering throughout the galaxy, something always felt wrong in the Force. 
-
Hunter and Rex led your team down the dim hallways of the ship’s wreckage, Omega and Echo following close behind them. Wrecker followed up the rear of the formation due to his larger stature. Ever the gentleman, he always insisted that you stay safely in front of him. 
The sounds of your feet hitting the metal flooring was the only noise to be heard on the abandoned starcraft. Rex’s insistence that the chips needed to be removed created a tension that the group couldn’t seem to shake. The knowledge of the inhibitor chips loomed like a dark shadow over the team, just like the dark shadows obscuring the path to the ship’s medbay. 
A quiet grunt broke the silence, coming from the large man behind you. 
Every head whipped around to look at him, and Wrecker paused, rubbing the side of his head. 
“-’ts just a headache”, he awkwardly chuckled. His attempt to break the tension didn’t set anyone at ease. He’d never been much of a liar; it was clearly bothering him more than he was letting on. 
The rest of the group continued moving forward, but you paused to look back at your lover’s face. He met your eyes and tried to smile, but it was more like a grimace. Looking at his tanned face, you felt a disturbance in the Force. 
You started to speak, but the feeling was gone as quickly as it came. You wanted to wonder if it had anything to do with the inhibitor chips… but you quickly shoved that thought to the back of your mind.
"There’s no reason why the chips would suddenly engage for no reason", you thought to yourself, shaking your head. Trusting too heavily in Force visions and hunches was foolish. Wrecker’s eyebrow crooked in confusion as you hesitated, but you tried to give him a reassuring look.
Rex’s muffled voice broke your thoughts, calling you both to move forward. The rest of the team had already ventured forward to the next room. As you walked forward to cross the threshold, a cool shiver ran up your back. You tried to shake it off, and continued to rejoin the group. 
The faint red emergency lights around the floor provided just enough illumination to make out the layout of the large room. Clinical furniture and medical equipment had been toppled and cast around the room haphazardly. In the center of the room was an older med chamber, dusty but largely undisturbed. Despite the room’s eerie appearance,
Rex stopped and nodded at the group- that dusty equipment could do the job. Hunter spoke up first, his gruff voice addressing the group. 
“Which one of you wants to go first?”. A sea of awkward and anxious expressions looked around at each other. After a moment, the smallest batcher stepped forward. 
“How do we know that this surgery is safe?”, doubted Omega. 
“Just because Rex’s surgery went well doesn’t mean that you all will be okay”, she added, the worry clear in her voice. Her eyes flickered to Rex, but he didn’t provide any reassurance. 
Tech started to speak, but a low grunt interrupted him. 
All eyes were on Wrecker, who was again holding the side of his head. Unlike earlier, he remained silent, his closed eyes slightly twitching. 
You could feel the pain start to roll off him through the Force, as he held a tight grip on his head. 
“Wrecker?”, you worried, nerves creeping up into your throat. 
You took a step towards him without thinking, reaching for his face, but he didn’t move. Something was very wrong for him to be so quiet. 
You cradled the smooth curve of his jaw in your hand, running a thumb across the side of his cheek. He let out a low moan, clenching his jaw but otherwise remaining motionless. 
Suddenly, another cold chill ran up your skin. A deep sense of danger surged through the Force. It startled you into drawing your hand back, your heart jumping up into your throat. 
Louder, you tried to coax an answer out of the larger clone. 
“Wrecker…,” you ask, concern shaking your voice, “What’s wrong?”. 
Wrecker’s warm presence in the back of your mind was gone in a split second, replaced with a null, dark void. Sharp panic ran through your veins as another disturbance rippled through the Force. You stepped back, watching how Wrecker’s form became even more still. 
His vode around him tensed, watching your reactions with caution. From the corner of your eye, you could see Hunter step in front of Omega to shield her. Your clouded brain didn’t understand- what would he shield her from? 
Wrecker’s arms dropped lifelessly to his side as his eyes slid open. You could sense the other troopers starting to move, but you couldn’t bring yourself to look away. Those deep brown eyes that you loved had glazed over, no sign of the laughter they usually carried. 
Like a droid powering up, Wrecker straightened to his full height while looking around the room. You were reminded of just how imposing he really is, towering over you and the other clones. His gaze finally fell on you. You both stood at a standstill, a few seconds seeming like an eternity. 
Without warning, Wrecker suddenly reached for his blaster. Your breath caught in your throat, fear bubbling up in your chest. Hunter was one step ahead of him, rushing forward to pull the weapon from his hands before he could wield it against you. 
His deep voice was gruff when he grunted out against his brother, but his gaze didn’t leave you. 
“Jedi are traitors”, Wrecker growled. 
He lunged for you, but you were able to jump back just in time. Hunter called out before Wrecker could reach for you again. 
“Wrecker, stand down!”. The leader brandished his blaster, stepping forward to provide you some cover. 
“This isn’t you,” he protested. 
“That’s just the chip talking. You don’t really believe that”. The large clone hesitated at the sound of his brother’s voice. For a moment, you could feel a small flicker of Wrecker’s Force signature in the back of your mind. 
You froze, searching for any sign of the man you loved behind those dark eyes. A deep snarl cut that hope short as a warning left his mouth. 
“Good soldiers follow orders”.
--
another chapter soon to follow! please enjoy and share your thoughts :) i will finish posting this work here, then clean up the final product for ao3 :3
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