#▚ EVENT:\\ DEPTHS PT 1;

[2kmps]

PERSIMMON & INK ; PT ONE OF TWO

yakuza!getō suguru x tattoo artist!reader| 1/2 | wc; 12.9k

story summary; you're a tattoo artist hidden amidst the bustle of shinjuku city and renown with tourists. due to a misstep of your shady employee, you're visited one night at closing by an eerily beautiful man in a disheveled suit and no tie requesting an intricate back piece done traditionally. the undertaking slowly begins to unthread your life piece-by-piece the closer you get to him until there is no way out.

story warnings; dark content, yakuza au!, details about tattooing, traditional tattooing (tebori), money laundering, injuries to mc, implied death of oc, manipulation, power imbalance, a bunch of cultish shit, mc doesn't fuck around and is a hardass + sort of a bully to their employee, sex w/ injury, getō smokes, mc dogging on foreigners, implied stalking, prose + detail heavy, explicit sexual content, heavily implied homicide, graphic details of violence + wounds.

read the warnings! + mdni! events within this story are not indicative of my personal viewpoints.

thank you @ceruleansol for your earlier proofreading efforts! appreciative, as always!

a/n: this is part one of two. i strongly implore that you reblog & interact with this post! it helps out authors tremendously when you do!

A silvery peal called out to the little shop stifled in past-midnight silence. During regular business hours, it was a good sound to hear; it meant that your next client had parked their feet through the threshold behind a closed door and jittered a bell hanging by a red string. In this case, you hadn't been fast enough to flick off the neon signage anchored into the building outside, nor set the deadbolt to signal the shop had retired for the night.

You were still hard at work wiping down your workspace, the last appointment of the night having taken several hours longer than intended with a squeamish foreigner who couldn't bite his knuckles long enough for you to finish linework on his ankle.

"It's past midnight. Come back some other time," you said, inflectionless, unwilling to be deterred in your task. It didn't occur to you to even give this newcomer the time of day by looking at them. "I have all my information online. Email for appointment bookings."

"Oh, really? That's too bad," replied the stranger, voice traceless of the frustration you were accustomed to when turning people away at odd hours. "I was told this would be a better time to come by for a consultation."

That made you jolt upright, swiveling toward the man standing inside your shop. Strangely, you hadn't anticipated the way he sounded when he spoke—affable, syrupy, and an elegant, fluid stroke on glazed canvas—to be so different from how he looked—tall, lean, refined with a sort of edge to him that'd intrigue anyone in a room he walked into.

Apart from his appearance, something you couldn't be sure was real with him bathed in the faint neon-red glow from flickering bulbs filtering in through the windows, you were drawn to the somewhat disheveled suit he wore. It looked like something a salaryman uniformed himself in while sitting on his ass for twelve hours in one of Tokyo's skyscrapers.

He doesn't have a tie. That stood out to you at this late hour.

"I didn't tell you that." You suspected who did and let your voice rise above the pitch of the checkered wall clock and drone of an oscillating ceiling fan directly above you. "Kōji! Get out here!"

From the depths of your little shop, tucked away in the furthest corner behind a door painted the same morose gray as the walls flanking it, there was a great ruckus—a chair tipping over, a body smashing to the floor, and feet fumbling over and over again until a weaselly fellow skittered out into the parlor.

"Ye-yeah? What's up? Time to—"

"Get this guy scheduled for a consultation for next month." Nothing prepared you for the way Kōji's color sank out of his cheeks and neck when you turned toward him. You pushed onward boldly, "I'm booked out for the next few weeks. Since you told him he could come by whenever, take responsibility and get him out."

Kōji's eyes were so much bigger, the whites of them showing, knuckles turning stark when his hand grasped your forearm, and he hinged forward at his waist, bowing so low you thought he'd fall forward.

"Thank you so much for your patience." Kōji sprung back up, feet popping into the air as he whisked you away into the back office, still repeatedly dipping his head to this man. "Please, give us a couple of minutes, and we'll be right with you."

"No worries." The suit guy smiled at you, catching your gaze before the gray door was pulled shut in your face. "Take your time."

Inside the dinky space, surrounded by unsteady towers of boxes brimming with all the things your second-floor apartment couldn't handle without making the walls burst at the seams, Kōji still had a hold on you. This time, however, both his hands gripped your arms, hot and clammy on your bare skin.

"You can't tell him to leave." Kōji hesitated to take any stance against you, any tone that could be implicated as threatening or domineering. Even through his quivering breaths, he tried to sound firm.

You looked at him incredulously, neck craning back in hopes it got the message across. It was easy enough to sweep away his hands. "The fuck, I can. It's my shop. Tell him to get out."

Kōji let his posture sag, whittling deep into himself as his fingers came together to pick at minuscule slithers of skin that left raw spots around his nails. He shook his head. "Not someone like him."

"Kōji—"

He was trying hard not to stick the underside of a fingernail between his teeth. A couple months ago, he had told you he wanted to kick the habit because he couldn't stand looking at his hands. This job and his natural disposition worked against him—long hours pouring over finances and bookkeeping, tucked away in a tiny room with a humming desk fan and no windows, would be enough to drive anyone's anxiety through the roof.

It wasn't ideal for him, you knew that, and suggested that he move his workstation around the shop or to the front-end counter as long as he didn't disturb the flow you kept going with clients. Worse than the isolation was his aversion to handling any potential customer interaction.

That's what made this so odd to you, so strange that he simply reiterated time and time again, "We can't kick him out," anytime you'd try to get anything else in word wise.

You had to back up, put some pressure against the new pulse in your temples. Kōji let his gaze flutter around the room, never steadying on your face for long enough for you to get a better read on him. His hair and neck were soaked with sweat. Beads of it dripped from his brow onto his shoes, leaving glistening, branching paths behind that never quite dried before more took their place.

It came to you then, just as a guess but one with enough certainty that dread wound itself against your spine and made you fidget.

"Is that—is he part of a gang?"

Kōji did a lot of work to keep his eyes off of you, still, lips thin and wet with sweat that he lapped away.

No confirmation was a confirmation—you launched yourself at him, wringing fistfuls of his stiff button-up until it was tight against him. You felt the heat of his body through the fabric wrapped around your hands.

He was shorter than the man in the parlor, but still taller than you. His feet stayed planted on the floor as you brought his face down to your height. "Did you fucking tell the yakuza about my shop, Kōji?! Is he here because of you?!"

"No, no! Not me! Not me!" Kōji wailed, crumbling beneath your bulbous stare. "Not on purpose! I swear! I swear! It was an accident. I was at lunch with… some friends, and I mentioned that I was working here. I guess word got around!"

"So, you're having lunch with criminals now?!" You wanted to wring his neck. It was physically impossible to bring yourself any closer to him without tasting the salty drops on his skin. "Are you insane?!"

Since the start of Kōji's employment years ago, you knew that he was a leery character, and having him on board to handle the more mundane, unsavory parts of running a business wasn't your best call to judgment. Still, he was efficiently organized in a way that made sense. He was fast and dedicated enough in doing things right that you stopped asking yourself questions about what antics he did on the side.

Up until now, he had never brought anything from the outside in to disrupt your status quo, the fine-tuned, well-oiled gears that kept your business running and clientele coming around like revolving doors. This was an entirely different ordeal, though, and you didn't know how to handle it.

You let Kōji whimper around your fists for a while longer, releasing him only once you were ready for a deep breath.

"I don't care." you said, taking a wide step away from him as your fingers scouted through all of the pockets on your person. There was one stick of gum left in your hoodie that went straight into your mouth. "I don't care. Stop being a fucking wuss and fix your mistake. Get him out of my shop."

Kōji gasped, scuttling closer to you just as his skinny, knobby knees bent inward and trembled. The weight of his body nearly toppled you when he went down to the floor, hands on your clothes. "No, no. Please. If you—if you turn him away, he'll tell the others, and who knows what'll happen to… us."

The selfish little imp actually meant himself.

It killed you to acknowledge that he wasn't wrong. You knew as much about the movements and customs of crime syndicates in Japan as anyone else, probably even less than the regular citizen, but they were still criminals with tight fists on the economy and underground.

All it would take is one bad remark and everything you had worked for would be razed to the ground.

"Who is he?" You pushed him off by the shoulders. "Who is that guy?"

You didn't like his silence, how his face warped, and his eyes fell to the white tips of your shoes. "Kōji."

Slowly, he answered, "He's the kingpin of the Uzumaki-kai."

"Goddamnit."

He stayed sniveling on the floor while you scrambled around the back office, turning over boxes and water-stained folders for particular papers you needed to go forward. Once you had them, you blotted the tip of an ink pen on your tongue, ripping a piece of white printer paper out from the tray and beginning a frantic scrawl that you weren't even sure was discernible.

You weren't in that room with Kōji for more than twenty minutes, reemerging into the parlor to find him—Getō Suguru, boss of the Uzumaki-kai—still waiting for you exactly where you'd left him. Only now, the smile he greeted you with was smug, shoulders lax against the door with one foot hiked up on it.

He had heard the entire thing, all of your shouts and Kōji's perilous pleas. The walls weren't as thick as you wished they were.

"You should find a different artist who specializes in the kind of work you want." you said, spreading your array of papers out on the front counter. The pen dotted your tongue once more before touching them, a messy signature left behind on black condemning lines.

"I've looked at your portfolio online." He had come closer, eyes set on the motions of your pen flying across paper. "It's the best I've seen in Tokyo."

There was something in his words that rang sweet and untrue. With Tokyo being one of the foremost tourist magnets in the world, attracting domestic business and foreign intrigue, competition amongst tattoo shops during peak seasons was staggering. You were part of the cluster of shops preferring to bring in international clientele because they were lured with anything quick and easy and cheap.

Simply put, they were your revolving door. Kōji monitored your shop's social media presence well, eyeballing analytics, trends, and patterns in the algorithm, so you stayed a persistent pest on the front page most days. Whatever moves he pulled worked, filled the books until you were writing in last second, twenty-minute appointments against the seams in your spiral bound to keep tabs.

You'd see anywhere from eight to twelve clients on the worst of days, most of them coming from overseas to tour the city or countryside. Every one of them chose premade designs from a catalog you kept nearby, all work you had committed to muscle memory and knew so well you could do the line work without a stencil and let your mind float somewhere else.

These foreigners wanted memorability, everlasting art imbued with stories from their exotic balmy summertime getaway where they stayed in air-conditioned hotels and shops and harassed the locals because it gave them a swell of adrenaline, a sense of adventure from the belief that they were in possession of more culture now than they had been before.

They tried to talk to you about those things because when they'd first see you, stepping under the chiming little bell, there was a brightness in their eyes of knowing you weren't someone who belonged—just like them. After so many years in the business, you were conversationally fluent in several languages but pretended not to be for all of two or three.

"I'll do it, but—" You pulled yourself from that reverie, pen flipping through your fingers for him to take. "You have to sign a bunch of waivers and there are conditions."

Getō had waited for you in well-tempered silence for several minutes and maintained that even now with a neutral expression. "Can you explain them to me?"

"The waivers are pretty standard," you said, shifting your weight against the counter. "The first three are making sure you understand the risk of scarring, infection, colors bleeding together. Fourth one is a liability waiver."

When you reached the final piece of paper buried beneath all the rest, the one you had handwritten and hastily signed, his eyes were gleaming with intrigue.

"What's this?"

There wasn't much to it, really, just a single paragraph on a bleach-white background, one blank line below your signature with enough room for a timestamp after it.

You made sure it was in his hand before you spoke again. "This is a rigid waiver agreeing that if I do your tattoo, you can't tell anyone you're associated with about this shop.

Getō wore an aloof smile. "What are you implying? I never said—"

"Stop trying to make me sound fucking stupid." You winced after the fact, not intending for it to have come out so aggressive. "Either sign it or leave, please. If anyone finds out you came here, it could ruin my business."

All but the ticking wall clock, a jarring neon against a backdrop of dark walls, and the ceiling fan with its monotonous beat from spinning blades had kept your shop from catapulting into silence.

You hadn't realized it until now, not until Getō had taken many long moments to examine the papers you'd given him and wordlessly signed them, that your chest was starting to ache from how hard your heart rammed your ribs.

You couldn't believe this was happening.

A snare formed in your throat once he finished printing the date and time on your special waiver, pen aside, papers stacked together as he tapped them on the countertop so they were neat.

He held them out to you, still with a beguiling smile that betrayed everything he represented. "Could I get copies? I'd like them for myself too."

You smeared sweaty palms down the back of your sweatpants, flexing out your fingers over and over until you felt sure enough that you could handle those papers without trembling. This must've been how Kōji felt when he had walked in earlier.

"I'll be back." Your bow was stiff and slight, probably an affront, but he let you go, turning to find a home on one of your low couches in the corner and started perusing the pages of your catalog displayed crookedly on an acrylic table in front of him.

It was all you could do to not slam the office door behind you, to intentionally scare the soul straight out of Koji's ass for putting you in this hard spot. If he weren't such an integral part of keeping this place afloat, you'd have fired him ages—years ago.

"I need copies," was everything you needed to say to make Kōji rifle through his arsenal of ridiculous expressions. He shrank under your stare, sliding deeper into his seat behind his desk. "You still need to be back here at eleven."

"Yes, I know." he mumbled, handing you fresh copies after stapling them together. You let the warmth sit on your hands for a while. "Do you want me to leave?"

Truthfully, you didn't want to be alone with Getō. You wanted to yell at Kōji a little more.

"Yeah. Get out of here."

And he ran.

A part of you hoped that Getō would've gotten bored with how long this entire process had been just to sign some flimsy agreements and listen to you pitch a fit at your employee. You prayed that the fleeting glance Kōji had made to the corner of the room was to check, not to confirm.

You stepped out into your workspace, boldly expecting to see it bathed in nothingness and shadows—but he was still there.

Getō let the tip of his shoe, a pointy closed-toe, jerk with the sounds of your wall clock. His leg was crossed, your catalog still splayed across his thigh as he looked at your preset designs, work made to appease the masses and feed into their fiction of Japan. You had half the hope that he'd be turned off by them and change his mind.

"What you're offering here and what's on your website are completely different."

This guy was observant.

You didn't like that.

"I get a lot of travelers." It crossed your mind to rip the book out of his hands. "They're the ones who make up the bulk of my business. My website hosts my professional work. It's what I prefer to do."

He didn't look up, continuing to leaf through the pages with long, lithe fingers. "So, you cater to foreigners, then?"

"My shop is small. It's just me and Kōji here. This place has to stay running somehow." You weren't sure why you were explaining yourself to him. "If that's something that bothers you, I can shred these papers, and you can find another artist."

Getō let his smile return, closing the catalog to drop it back onto the table. As though to challenge your stubbornness, he took the copies from you and skimmed them one more time.

"Thank you." He moved those aside too, now wholly focused on you. "Do you have time tonight to hear out my ideas?"

You were facing the wall clock now; it was almost two in the morning. If he wanted something more complex, it would take hours to work up a sketch for him. And that was being so bold to believe he'd like it on the first try.

"Got a deposit?" you asked. "Nonrefundable, of course."

He paid you what you wanted right then and there, to your complete astonishment. The price you had given him was astronomical, an act of spontaneity that you decided you'd pose to him as a joke if he got mad or guarded with severity.

No questions.

No doubt.

Just the warm clip of folded yen from his pocket that he didn't even look over. The yakuza were historically a stingy bunch, but he didn't even do a second sweep, didn't try to double back on you, and didn't seem to care.

"Let me get my stuff." You left the cash off to the side on the acrylic table. It was your equivalent of a cat showing its belly good-naturedly.

The money was still there when you returned with a tablet stuck under the sweat of your armpit and two mugs of tea, an act of hospitality you didn't often invoke mostly because you didn't care. These were dire circumstances, though, and you couldn't put it out of your mind (or nerves) that you were walking on thin ice laden with eggshells.

"It isn't anything fancy." You put your things down before handing him his mug. "It's from some random box I grabbed at the store."

Getō gave his thanks and took it from you, first sips coming as soon as he could bring his lips to it. He made no mention about the flavor or quality, didn't look at it with any amount of suspicion. It simply rested there against his palms while he waited patiently.

He was defeating every stereotype of yakuza that you had adopted from the movies and media. If it weren't for Kōji being a scummy little rat who liked hanging around trash in his off time and believing all of his reactions from a while ago, you'd be convinced that Getō wasn't affiliated at all.

A businessman with questionable practices, maybe, but not a greater part of the underbelly of society.

"It's a sort of complicated idea." He rearranged his legs so they were spread wide, back sinking into the worn green leather. Another sip. "Tell me if I should slow down."

True to his word, the tattoo he wanted was ambitious, terrifyingly ambitious, and something better left to a specialized skill set, not someone who bounced around between commercialized brand characters and bastardized interpretations of The Great Wave by Hokusai.

"I'd like the dragon to be white." Getō was partway through his explanation, now sitting forward on the edge of the couch, an elbow pointed down on a thigh to cradle his cheek. He was invested. "The eyes, hm, yellow or gold. You can choose what'd go best for the inside of its mouth. I want the head of it in the top left—"

"Hold on." You sighed, managing a lukewarm drink from your tea. "So, to go about the white, there are a couple of options: we leave that space empty, so it'll be your skin tone. Most people get dragons that are red or green or black. It'd be better to try that if you—"

"It has to be white." He looked at you the same, but his words were razored in a way so slight yet unmistakable. "What else can be done?"

"Well"—the leather creaked against your back the deeper you dug into it—"I could do white ink. I could get it opaque, but the problem with it is that it fades drastically; you'd need it retouched every couple of years."

"I see." His smile was wider. "I like that idea. Let's go with that."

You frowned. "You do know that white ink is expensive, right? So the price is going to jack up, and there's more pain involved since I'll have to apply more pressure."

"That's fine with me."

More specifics for the work he wanted flooded in: He wanted to start with his back, covering every bit of surface from his neck down to his tailbone. Afterward, he would branch out to both arms and finish the design over his breasts. It certainly aligned with artistry you've seen done by yakuza tattooists; the entire point of them was to be seen by those who mattered, easily concealed to those who didn't.

Most of the real estate was going to the white dragon with gold eyes first, the rest of it going to freestyle characters from fiction such as kuchisake-onna and religious iconography that he pursued with quite a bit of insistence.

You sketched until four in the morning, arranging characters and wispy, dreamy clouds. Long whiskers floated away from the dragon's snout, while the teeth you gave it were more comically blunt and human-like rather than jagged and threatening, a detail he seemed particularly delighted to see.

"What's with the Buddhist symbols?" You had to bring out your laptop to research those, settling on a few he gave a nod to. "Are you some kind of priest? This is a pretty specific scene you're giving me."

"It came to me in a dream." he said.

What a weirdo. Your fingers ached and cramped by the time you finished the draft, stylus leaving deep impressions in your skin that you were sure had knocked bone a few times.

From up close, you weren't too partial to how it looked like an amalgam of things surrounding all of the labor you put into specifics of the dragon, but when you moved it away, it came together like some hazy dreamscape.

"I should tell you why I chose you in the first place," was what he said when you spun the tablet around for him.

You had the device facing you again, pen notched through your fingers to apply some simple colors to the design. "I thought it was because you were enamored with me and my online portfolio."

Getō stared at you, humoring your joke with a smile even though you didn't see it. He stayed slouched over his thighs, fist moving to the side of his head to keep him upright.

"I'm looking for this to be done traditionally."

The tablet flattened on your lap, stylus rolling off of it onto the floor. You couldn't believe you didn't think of this. If he really was part of a crime syndicate, of course he would want all of the work done traditionally.

"That's going to bring in a whole host of problems." You let your thumb hover dangerously close to the trash bin button in the top right of the screen. "First of all, the overall cost of this is going up by twice what I've already quoted you."

"No worries." Getō shrugged his shoulders. "I've done my research."

But you weren't done. "Healing time will be reduced, but some of my clients have told me it's more painful than a machine."

"I'm not 'some' of those clients." he rejoined.

You were suddenly wishing your tea wasn't cold so you could disappear into it for a while. The tablet ran hot on your thighs, dragging your eyes back down to the drawing, thoughts flitting through what it'd mean for business, expenses in versus expenses out, and how committing to this would solidify you as a yakuza artist.

It would be inescapable and follow your reputation into the ground if Getō ever spread word about it.

"This back piece is going to take me a really long time to do for you. A machine cuts that time in half." Maybe you could beg him to change his mind.

He wouldn't budge. "Yes, I'm well aware."

"So"—fine then, you'd give him something to reconsider—"you know for the sake of longevity that traditional isn't going to be the best? Machines are able to apply more force into the skin and move faster. Because you'll be relying on me instead of a machine, your line work will start to bleed within a few years and your color is going to fade pretty significantly, too."

If he was dissuaded, Getō never let on because he grinned. "You were the right choice, after all."

That ended the discussion and your night. Your eyes felt dry in their sockets, rolling them towards the wall where you read a big black number “5” on its clear plastic face. Getō didn't share that same urgency. He hadn't even checked a watch or a phone the entire time he was with you.

"Remember," you said, your tone daring, "you signed an agreement to not tell anyone about this place. I expect you to keep your word."

"Of course. I wouldn't consider breaking it in my wildest dreams." Effortless and gentle, he said this to you with fondness that felt oddly misplaced. "After all, we prefer choosing our artists. And, now, you're mine. I'll see you soon."

You locked the door after him without saying anything, losing track of his body through the window as he went somewhere under the shadows cast by taller buildings close by.

This time, you made sure to flip off the neon signage that had been glowing outside all night long.

━◦○◦━◦○◦━━◦○◦━◦○◦━━◦○◦━◦○◦━

The Uzumaki-kai had started out under a different name in the forties, one seemingly redacted from all publications shortly after the change. It had a tumultuous history with frequent power shifts and internal disputes that had left it nearly eradicated by the seventies until Yorimitsu Asahi climbed to the peak of the hierarchy. Within ten years, membership tripled, revenue increased into the billions, and nearly all records of their exploits had dropped off the edge.

Kōji had hit a dead end in his research for you, an attempt to give you some peace of mind in what you were dealing with. The idea was to hit the ground running, so when Getō came back around, you'd have some vague notion of what to expect. But all you were able to do was skim the surface of an, allegedly, power-hungry and morally depraved bunch of men and women.

The most recent details of their movements dated back two years ago, whereas the more credible sources haven't reported anything for nearly seven. In the earlier articles by a journalist gone undercover, they had a significant hand in the economy, mainly through casinos, prostitution, and ties to religious institutions.

You had to let out a groan because Kōji hit a wall—again. All of the latest news you could find were just sensationalist reprints about how they were actively scouting people, or giving charity to orphans, and where the yakuza ranked in the world amongst other crime syndicates.

"Hey." Getō was standing in front of you, just on the other side of your counter. "Ready to get this started?"

Snapping shut your laptop had been an instinctual response. A flush of adrenaline in your veins was chased away by the cold creep of fear reaching up your spine. This wasn't the same as mom catching you watching porn or a teacher hovering close enough to see you cheat.

This was the chill of knowing you were digging into things you shouldn't be.

"Wel—welcome back." You didn't mean it but bowed your head low anyway. "I never got a chance to schedule you in. It'll take me a while to set up, if you'd want to come back another day."

Getō had his hands in his pockets, posture relaxed just like the last time, and looked around the small square footage of your shop. It was big enough to arrange a few compact pieces of furniture in the corner, give breathing space for a couple of bodies in the middle while you worked on them, and the front-end counter where you sat.

You made use of decorative shelving to display all the things that customers wanted to see: bottles of ink, strange art, little trinkets to give the place some interest so you wouldn't have to be. Everything else was shoved into the back office to clog up Kōji's space or upstairs in your apartment where you could fit it.

"No." Getō took a walk over to one of the shelves, a collection of inks you had arranged by color family. "I'd like to start today. I can wait for you to set up."

"Okay." You licked your lips. "Yup. That's fine. Kōji!"

With Kōji's help, what would've taken you close to an hour to prepare for Getō was whittled down to about thirty minutes. Just one look and the smarmy guy took on a more diminutive attitude, convincing you that if you were to walk away and come back, he'd probably be spit-shining the tops of Getō's shoes.

At least he wasn't sweating all over the floor again. You could watch the fragile flattery without completely twisting in disgust.

"One thing you didn't do last time was confirm that you were happy with the sketch." You had Kōji fetch your tablet and bring it up to show him. "Also, I refuse to start unless you have payment upfront. That was something else we didn't discuss."

"Th–that's a joke." Kōji sputtered.

You looked straight at Getō. "You're yakuza asking me for an extremely elaborate piece done traditionally with a lot of white ink. I have a right to want to protect my time and resources."

"I agree. The sketch is perfect." Getō said, fluid strides bringing him less than a couple of feet away. "Do you prefer cash or card?"

You were seeing him in the daylight, not awash in flickering neon or shrinking away into shadows, and he was absolutely breathtaking. It made you think how easy it'd be to lure someone into the Uzumaki-kai by his looks alone.

Payment had been seamless enough, a quick transaction that Kōji verified before scuttling out of the shop for the evening. You were left with this man, this dangerous, handsome man, to undress in front of you, casually peeling layers of his suit away until the first slithers of pale skin sent your gaze to the instrument in your fingers.

Getō only removed his jacket and button-up since his back piece alone would take months to complete, a damning thing to realize once you thought about it.

This just felt too real.

This was really happening, and all you wanted to do was blame Kōji for putting you in this position.

"So, what you're going to do is lie down." You slipped on a pair of disposable gloves and gestured to the massage table behind him. A white sheet had been placed over the black leather underneath. "If you need extra padding, let me know. Since we're building this entire piece around the white dragon, that's what I'm focusing on for now."

He leaned his weight against the table, hands back in his pockets. You tried keeping your eyes off his chest, off of his defined pectorals and abdomen, away from the thickness of his arms. The knowing smile inching onto his lips proved that you had failed.

"I'm going to be using a projector to position the image on your back, draw it out with a marker, and start with the needles." You could finally show him the thing in your hand. It was a long glazed stick with a metal ferrule attaching a row of sterile needles at the tip. "You'll feel me stretch your skin and start poking. It makes a weird sound because of how it needs to be angled, how it goes into the skin."

You took a breath, and he actually laughed.

"That was a mouthful." He hinged forward, bringing his face closer to the rod. "Not quite as 'traditional' as I thought it would be."

"There are modern adaptations to everything. It used to be bamboo, this is made from persimmon." you said, lowering the instrument onto a silver tray next to all the others of varying sizes. "What makes it traditional is the technique applied. I guarantee your buddies aren't going to back-alley places in Japan and having someone stab their backs with unsterilized needles tied to a piece of wood."

His dark eyes followed your path to the projector, watching you flip the switch and cast an image of the dragon on the table. "You never know. Some of them just don't know any better. They don't always have the best show of judgment. They need guidance."

You had something to say to that but thought better of all your organs and didn't. "Cool. Get on the table so we can start."

The landscape of his back was as defined and lovely as the front of him. You waited until the white dragon was scaled down to the appropriate size and positioned over him to touch his skin, letting your fingertips soak up all his warmth.

"We'll see how far I get today," you were saying, dragging a narrow marker tip across the broad sprawl of him. "It's going to take me longer than it usually does, and I don't really go longer than eight-hour appointments."

"There's plenty of time." This guy had infinite patience, it seemed.

And when the time came for the first prods with your needles, you paused to ask, "Need a break? Want some background noise?"

"I'm talking to you," he said, pulling a few straggling pieces of ebony hair over his shoulder. "That’s enough for me." It sounded ridiculous when he said it and worse when it replayed in your head. "What made you want to practice traditionally?"

You were already in several jabs, wiping down between them to keep a visual of what you were doing. "My mentor is one of the best traditional artists in Japan. I learned everything from him. He used to work in Osaka, I'm not sure about now. I lost contact with him years ago."

"That's too bad." he said. "Have you thought about looking for him?"

The last thing you were interested in was talking about finding people with yakuza, so after a few more pokes along the middle of his back, dipping into that pretty region that made his waist look so waspy, you decided to flip the script.

"What about you? Did you just dream about joining a gang, or…?"

He shifted his cheek to his arms, looking along his nose at your hunched shoulders. "Would you believe me if I gave you an answer?"

You dabbed his skin. "Probably not."

There wasn't much of a lull in conversation before he was onto the next topic, steering away from the niceties onto the real things he wanted to ask. You had been around the block a time or two; you knew the look people got when they had certain questions stewing inside their heads.

The only thing that ever stopped them was the devastatingly desperate aversion to kicking up dust and drama in public, and probably because they weren't yakuza.

Getō was the opposite in this scenario, so you lost.

"Where are you from?" There it was.

You sucked in a breath. "Gifu prefecture."

"That's not what I meant." He was still observing you with all the self-possession of a saint, but also unflinching obstinance that you couldn't get out of by hijacking the conversation again. "You weren't born in Japan, were you? Isn't it pretty bold of you to play off foreigners' lack of awareness for profit?"

As you swiped at the traces of ink and blood that coalesced into a single ugly bead, you noticed he hadn't winced once the entire time you pushed ink.

Would he if you stabbed him a little harder?

"That's a long story." Stab. Stab. Stab. His expression remained beautiful and pristine. "I don't feel like answering it."

He smiled. "Hm."

━◦○◦━◦○◦━━◦○◦━◦○◦━━◦○◦━◦○◦━

The game of twenty questions spilled over from one session into the next, weeks apart, yet Getō always remembered where you both left off like he was troubling himself to commit all the contents of a crumpled-up list to memory. Sometimes, between a peaceful interlude that rendered conversation bare, the flawless terrain of his back stretched between your fingers as your needles sunk deep, you'd think to yourself that had he been any other man—you'd be impressed by the effort.

Unlike other scenarios that leaned in your favor, boorish foreign men left unanswered when they'd talk about your body—where were you hiding tattoos? Under your clothes? Can we see? They'd laugh with one another because they almost always traveled in groups. Questions morphed into ugliness when they translated silence to incompetence; quips turned lewd and derogatory, but you no longer existed to them because you couldn't talk back.

That luxury of feigning ignorance wasn't packaged with Getō, having had lured that nugget of trivia out of you by the end of his first session. He never said those things about you, never let his inquisitiveness or eyes roam like you already had him. It was disgusting how being beneath his stare made you feel so vulnerable, stripped down to nothing but your underwear without that ever happening, without him ever having touched you.

You told yourself you'd be relieved the second this piece was finally finished, and he'd be gone from your shop for good.

"How long have you been a tattoo artist?"

But, still, for now, this little game with him continued, and he led the way.

"About ten years." No one had asked you that before, so it took you a few seconds for you to respond. Even then, you weren't entirely certain that was right. "Yeah, probably about ten years."

"Hm." Getō was in the habit of making that sound to quite a few of your answers. "You don't look it."

You jolted upright in your chair, fingers lifting away from his back just as you gave your tongue a reproachful click. All it would take would be one hard open-palm slap right against the sorest spot on his back to put him in a world of hurt and permanently fuck up the ink under his skin. You'd absolutely have your throat slit or neck snapped at the gallows, but it would be well worth the risk at this moment.

"What the hell is that—"

Getō's mellifluous laughter made your anger whittle to heat behind the ears before any words even made it out of his mouth. He tried keeping his back still. "Haha, sorry, that came out wrong. I meant: you look too young to have been doing this for ten years."

Good recovery. Smooth man.

You weren't nearly as amicable. "Aren't you too old to be playing pretend with a bunch of other guys?"

He let air out hard through his nostrils, lips pulling his smile wide enough for you to see the wet glisten on his white teeth.

"Fair enough."

Time crept along like that for the pair of you, multiple sessions coming and going with inconsequential banter that was always more upsetting to you than it ever was to him. Somewhere along the way, you had been convinced that Getō was unflappable—impossible to rouse to anger, regardless of the times your clap-backs had taken a personal edge, aiming to bury deeper than any of your needles could reach.

It was enough when he'd frown, his pretty mouth pressed firm and drawn down. Oddly, when he'd look at you like that, it was reminiscent of something wholly unsettling, pulled from some deep recess in your memory that you couldn't quite put a finger on until it happened again one evening.

You had taken things a bit too far, reminding yourself that it was better to keep your distance from him. All it would take was one wrong comment on one bad day for this rapport to come crashing down on you with every bit of the same force as a tsunami, ruining everything you had built.

Getō had decided he needed a break, something uncharacteristic in the months you had spent with him as your client, and got up from the table. He couldn't go far without covering his back, so he stayed wedged between the inside and outside, trapped in the door and setting off the delicate, jangling bell overhead more times than you were comfortable with.

He had looked at you before walking away, though, that frown marring his visage, weighing down his beauty with cavernous shadows around his mouth. You acted like Kōji in that moment, feeble and pathetic, withering into a smaller version of yourself so maybe he'd show mercy.

Between those tense minutes, until he returned to the massage table, you figured out what made his disapproval so familiar.

It was like burdening the weight of a disappointed parent, like knowing you had failed another test in school, and your teacher was delivering results with that same sort of dissatisfaction while peeking over their glasses at you.

You felt like you were being reprimanded in the way only someone with influence on your life could have.

It really rubbed you the wrong way.

"Sorry." It was a hard word for you to say. Getō was on his stomach again, cheek pressed atop his arms so he could look at you. "Sometimes, I get carried away. Guess that's what I get for spending all my time with Kōji."

Cue a loud sneeze from the back office.

His placid smile was a relief to see. "You should get out more often and see other guys."

There was no disputing that fact. Besides your mainly male clientele, Kōji was the only man you were in any regular contact with. Life had a way of keeping people apart, widening the gaps of time from months into years, wearing away at those delicate threads of friendship until they were all but frayed and irreplaceable.

It was simply the natural progression of adulthood, and it was boring and terribly lonely. Tattooing made your life easier, numbed you to becoming just another downtrodden drunk hunched over a glass full of glowing gold, lusting after the bare minimum of affection from anyone.

This job kept your head above water, just enough so you could forget all of that and spend your time exactly how you wanted to—

"Do you have a boyfriend?"

His question hit you full throttle, stealing the breath from your lungs as though he had landed a fist into your gut. It was just a few nonchalant words, an easy way to keep the conversation flowing, yet it had set your heart aflutter. You heard the rhythm of it ricocheting in your skull. It was suddenly so much harder to hold his skin taut, fingertips slipping inside the nitrile gloves you wore.

"A boyfriend?" A word that sat heavy on your tongue, unfamiliar, flustering you. "I don't have the time for that."

Getō shifted on the bed, something he usually didn't do without warning you beforehand. You let him get situated, taking that moment to also change your gloves beneath the table after patting them dry on your thighs. The skin around your fingertips had swelled and indented from moisture, further augmenting agitation.

He was gazing ahead now, narrow chin cradled in a slot made by his fingers. You couldn't tell what he was looking at since you kept so much stuff mounted on the walls to detract attention from you. It could've been anything.

You did think his vision aligned with your catalog of preset designs, though, leaving you just a little more self-conscious than his question had already made you.

When he did say something, his smile didn't quite reach how despondent he sounded, "It seems like no one has the time anymore. We've all lost our way."

━◦○◦━◦○◦━━◦○◦━◦○◦━━◦○◦━◦○◦━

Getō came by astonishingly early one day with the earthiness of a good brew wafting all around him. The shop had been open less than an hour, giving you just enough time to unlock the entrance and flip on all the signage before he walked in.

The little bell signaled him, both your eyes and nose lured by the cheery sound of it as well as the scent. You had expected to see Kōji at first; it wasn't unlike him to show up before his scheduled shift. Years of cubicle servitude had a way of battering people into automated drones. Workers like him might as well have been walking on conveyor belts their entire lives—going somewhere without actually getting anywhere.

Kōji also only survived off of his thirty-two-ounce thermos sloshing with coffee. Sometimes he'd share with you so you wouldn't need to deplete the shop's supply or climb two flights of stairs to your apartment to make some, but more often than not, he was halfway through that gigantic flask by midafternoon.

So to see that it was Getō taking languid strides up to your counter with two coffee cups, palms wrapped around slithers of cardboard to keep his skin from blistering, you had to correct a grimace.

"Getō." You used his name tentatively, always sparingly. It tasted unwelcome on your tongue, like the smoky bitterness of charred meat or the tang of vomit that burned through your nostrils and made your mouth salivate. "I didn't have you down for today. I have other clients coming in later."

"I'm sure they don't mind rescheduling." He smiled as usual, but the finality behind his words sent quakes down your spine. "I don't know how you take your coffee, so I just asked for cream and sugar. I'm more partial to tea, but sometimes it just doesn't give the kick I'm looking for."

You meticulously avoided his fingers as he handed over one of the cups. The lid was marked with your initials, an act of thoughtfulness you would've been moved by had he—once again—been anyone else.

For Getō, he simply watched you with a tired, satiated smile as though the very notion of buying you coffee was worthy of some ovation. For you, seeing those black lines smear and spear outward across the white lid as dainty wisps of steam escaped wherever they could felt damning.

"How is it?" he asked, lips caressing the lifted rim of his own beverage. "You can be honest."

He sipped at the same time as you, pacing himself so your cups tilted simultaneously, eyes locked on tight, evaluating your slightest flinch. A hot trickle reached your tongue and crawled down your throat, feeling as though it were blooming out into your lungs and veins. It was known by him as well, like sharing the same experience, tipping the same cup and tasting those faint traces of one another, emulating warmth against your lips and in your mouth, lessening whatever uneasy longing he had started to spur inside of you.

You didn't know if the shudder that rattled down along your back came from the penetrating depths of his dark eyes or the bitter drink sinking into your cheeks, making you pucker.

Time forwarded for you again after that. The wall clock continued its eternal rotation, bustling bodies passed your shop, and you had lost those few seconds as though trapped in a dream.

"Did I add too much sugar?" Getō acted the same, perfectly pleasant smile seeming more like a fastened feature to you these days. "You sort of winced."

You set the cup down, ducking away from the front counter to collect your things out of the back office.

"It was actually too bitter for me."

Kōji came through the threshold about an hour later with some semblance of urgency, nearly knocking the door wide enough for it to slam into the wall. All of the color bled out of his cheeks, leaving his face a ghostly hue once he realized he was on the receiving end of Getō's stare. You were hunkered over his back, hands at work with the long stick and needles.

"If you break something, it's coming out of your paycheck." you drawled, so thoroughly enveloped by the black tracks left behind from your ink that you didn't notice Kōji's uneasiness turn into dewy skin and a beading forehead.

"I—can I talk to you in the back for a second?" Kōji hung onto every word, testing the sound of them while gauging Getō's quiet expressions. "There's—you need to see something."

"Kōji, seriously?" You didn't think you needed to point out Getō, or the fact that you were pulling ink from a glob on your glove. "Just tell me later, dude."

His face stretched as though wounded. "It's important. I swear. I wouldn't be asking if—"

"Is there a reason why you can't say it in front of me?" Getō had his nose pointed at Kōji, arm turned red beneath his cheek as he simpered. "Nothing's stopping you from telling us both right here, right now."

The scrawny man melted into himself, fingers fiddling together in a brave attempt to keep his teeth off of his nails and open sores on his cuticles. Whatever thing he had wanted to say was abandoned in that moment, stifled in his throat by a few words from the man on your massage table.

Your fingers halted, hovering over Getō's back as you took in the tone of his remarks to your employee, contemplating with a frown to threaten to throw him out.

"Don't talk to him like that." The leather underneath you groaned as you sat up straight on your stool. "This is my shop. You're not going to disrespect my employ—Kōji!"

He had already rushed away behind the somber gray door into the back office.

"Kōji!" You swiveled away from Getō, instrument an afterthought on the silver tray at your side. Seconds later, you swung back around. "You need to leave."

Getō, who had watched the entire thing from his arms, suddenly lifted his head and shoulders up, face weighed by surprise.

"What?" His eyes were wide. "Come again?"

You didn't falter. "Get the hell out of my shop. We're done for today."

His confusion mellowed into something undefinable, an expression you couldn't read with eyes that tracked across your face as though trying to catch a bluff. Nothing familiar remained in his gaze, the cold snare he held you in for several seconds, the depths of him black as coal and empty. For those few beats, until he looked away, you had held your breath without realizing it and heard blood gushing in your ears.

"You live in the apartment above here, right? On the second floor?" Getō still had his back to you, fingers fussing with the buttons on the front of his white shirt. "You should be careful."

Every ounce of courage you had gathered just moments before was suddenly sucked dry, stolen from your bones and spine, making your posture crumble on the stool. Dread wrapped around you like freezing, creeping tendrils that made the fine hairs on your neck stick out, put a knot in your throat that might as well have been his fist.

"How—how do you know that, Getō?" You were halfway out of your seat, fingers resting against cool metal and close to your arsenal of needles mounted to persimmon dowels. "Are you watching me?"

"Mm, not quite." He turned around while finishing the last buttons, expression void of that easygoing smile and mirthful glint in his eye that you had come to rely on from him. Without it, it was like you were freefalling into the unknown without a net to catch your back. "You should fire that assistant of yours soon."

"Kōji?" You had thought that same thing many times, but hearing it from someone else was an insult. "He's been here for years. He does his job. Who do you think you are to come in here, harass my employee, and tell me to fire him? This is my shop. Before you're anyone, you're a client who I have every right to refund and turn the fuck away."

"I suppose that's true." Getō said, rounding the table, coming into such close proximity to you that you could smell faint remnants of coffee on his clothes and breath, saw the late morning glow filtering in through the windows give his eyes a golden glint. "It's only a suggestion, but you should take it. I don't want to see you take the fall for things he meddles in."

You frowned. "What does that mean?"

He showed you one of his good-tempered smiles instead of answering, an easy way to stop the conversation before it could snowball into something else, dragging you deeper into his world more than what you already are.

There was a part of you convinced that he wanted to submerge you into that gross underbelly with him all the way, steal you below the surface, take you away from everything you'd ever known. But when the light would return to his eyes, just like now, and he looked upon you with such fondness, trying to smother your inquiries with lips pressed thin and tight so as to seal all his secrets behind them, you weren't so sure what his intentions were.

Some of his weight was suddenly on your shoulder, collected in the palm of his hand cradling the roundness of it. His fingertips pushed into the fabric, pressed divots into your skin and burned where he squeezed.

"Take care of yourself." Getō said, surprising you one last time by using that same hand, the very peaks of his knuckles to skim your cheek on his way past. "I'll see you soon."

━◦○◦━◦○◦━━◦○◦━◦○◦━━◦○◦━◦○◦━

Firing Kōji was never an option, no matter what he involved himself with after work. There would be no business for you to spin signage for in the mornings, a studio to keep tidy, leather chairs to polish and preserve, and no stuttering neon light to bask under in the late hours of silence before returning upstairs to your bed.

Long ago, you had decided it made more sense to simply not see what didn't involve you directly, what didn't benefit you, because it was easier than acknowledging that the person you'd chosen to run everything in the background probably wasn't ideal. You'd known for years that his dealings outside your shop erred on the wrong side of the law, most likely, but it didn't matter as long as you didn't have to know exactly what it was.

As long as no one found him out, traced his employment to your tattoo shop, and turned your revolving door of clientele into thin, dwindling trickles, you'd force yourself to forgive him for whatever misdeeds he committed. He came into work on time every single day with his coffee flask and messenger bag, made no complaints about his workload and worn-in swivel chair that sometimes squealed when it turned, and didn't try to usurp the business from you.

He was the perfect employee and still was, even weeks following the incident with Getō. Every attempt you had made since then to get information out of him about that day was thwarted, distracted by numbers, stock invoices, client bookings, and asking if you wanted yakisoba from the little old lady down the road for lunch.

Kōji had decided you were untrustworthy now, a fact you were well aware of and unsure of how to handle. Less because he was your only employee—and, regrettably, the closest confidant you had in your life at all—but more that the entire ordeal left you uneasy and bothered.

He was doing something he shouldn't be, and Getō already knew about it and where you lived. Things weren't adding up, and you were the only one left in the dark.

One Sunday afternoon off left you with plenty of time to mull it over while packing around armfuls of groceries. A mid-autumn breeze was fabricated by cars passing through the city, throwing your hair in disarray, catching crisp bursts of air under your collar to leave you colder than you had been seconds ago. Your body was lulled into a relaxed state from the wind rocking your body left and right, pulled by the invisible force of it.

Your eyes stuck to the crosswalk sign, waiting for it to turn green, for the cluster of scuttering bodies to trot their way across and clear the area so they weren't stranded there until the next rotation. Their idle chatter hardly registered to you while you stood there next to them—colors of clothing, small domes of umbrellas, the drone of passing car engines felt so far away and surreal to you.

Everything seemed to vanish except your heartbeat when the light finally changed, eyes drifting down toward something that had an inexplicable pull on you, first as a slither of all black that grew tall and eventually into the shape of a body. You felt like you were searching through a sea of pines for that one glimpse at something that had caught your attention.

It was then that you realized what had you so engrossed was the unfaltering stare of another. You nearly collided with a man in a beige coat two feet ahead of you when you saw that it was Getō standing at the other end of the crosswalk.

Why is he here? Is he following me? You didn't give yourself the time to ruminate before ducking low behind a group of teenagers eagerly discussing their new idol obsession. A couple of the girls were in gyaru fashion, something you'd expect on a day trip to Harajuku, not on the west side of Tokyo near Shinjuku.

They paid little mind to you lingering entirely too close to them, using the shelf of a boy's shoulder to hazard a peek out at the scene until you had reached the end of the crosswalk with them. They dispersed in all different directions, sharing casual partings before you could think of where to go next, legs suddenly snared to the concrete when Getō called out from nearby.

"Hey, what a coincidence to see you here."

"Is it, really?" You tried remembering where you were in Shinjuku.

The red-light district, Kabukichō, the typical yakuza stomping grounds, wasn't far from here. It was one of those things that was easy to forget once the novelty of living in the area wore away, but it always meant something to someone else. That group of kids flashed in your mind briefly. It might've been their first time exploring a place like Shinjuku by themselves.

Getō came closer with his hands buried deep in his pants, the other half of a black sweatsuit that was too large for his frame. You tried to keep your eyes moving around a thinning crowd, steeped in uncertainty of how different interacting with him on the streets would be to piercing his back with needles.

"Are you heading home?" He saw your discomfort before the bags on your arms, his tone softening in the same way you expected it would for a frightened animal. "Do you need help carrying—"

"Hey, Suguru!" Another man showed himself through the intermix of bountiful bodies, his shape hidden beneath similarly slouchy, loose folds of clothing. His voice carried a similar pitch as the other, albeit inelegant and insouciant, with a head that was fully white and eyes so terrifyingly blue you guessed he had to be mixed with something.

For those few seconds you spared him a glance, you were set awash in a sensation of familiarity—a distant type of it. The same sort you'd expect to have while watching a movie with the appearance of an actor that startled you because you knew you had seen him from somewhere, but you couldn't place just exactly where.

If it hadn't been for his petulant seeming disposition on arrival and slothful bearings that ruined his posture and any semblance of class based on his bizarre, exotic beauty—you would have thought he was a model or someone of status, at the very least. His voice was annoying, however, and somewhat nasally as he complained about being left behind when Getō had noticed you skulking from afar.

Getō handled him benignly, almost disinterestedly, despite all of the speaking that coalesced into something even you stopped caring about. You made up your mind to use the distraction as a way to get out of this brush in public, spun on rubber soles, and almost began away until Getō broke apart from him and took the straps on one of your bags.

"Hold on"—he didn't let go despite how your features purposefully deformed from his nearness, a brazen attempt to look ugly to him—"you're a long way from home. Let me carry a few bags to help you out. Gojō, I'll see you around."

"Whaaaaat?! Seriously?" complained the other, making a whale of a noise that didn't match his relaxed stance. His bones seemed to collapse into the heaps of fabric he had stuck his arms through that day.

You tried putting opposite pressure on your bag to reclaim it from Getō, though he got what he wanted in the end. "I don't want to trouble you. I can carry these myself."

"It's no trouble." Getō insisted, still with obscene patience that overwhelmed your dogged determination to avoid causing an awkward shift between the two men.

As it was natural in Japan, jumpers and coats and pretty umbrellas wove through your motley bunch without being too distracted by the scene. They all had somewhere to go, somewhere to be, however truly inconsequential their destination was. It would've demanded too much of their concentration and willpower to look at everyone who made a ruckus in the streets of Shinjuku, but maybe they paid a little more attention because Getō and Gojō were beautiful, and you were like the hapless protagonist in a drama.

In that moment, however, you felt equal parts unfortunate that Getō bunched his long fluid strides to shorter ones to mime the pace of yours as he walked away from Gojō alongside you, all but two of your bags on his arms, and equal parts secretly enthralled by the experience and that you had been chosen over whatever former objective the two men shared.

"What was the point of us coming to Shinjuku if you're just leaving me here?! You suck!" Gojō's voice was carried by the false autumnal breeze whirled up by cars and gas exhausts, loud and strange because the urgency behind it had dropped off long ago. Now, it just sounded like he was calling after you both in casual parting like someone would from their doorstep down the road.

On that same fake wind, somewhere farther away but still close enough to see the uneven tips of Gojō’s white hair fluttering out away from his scalp, you could've sworn you heard the shape of your name—the pronunciation of it unmistakable—with all the same inflection Getō uttered when using it with you, weaponizing it so your ears would perk and be forced to hear him.

"I'm not doing any more of your tattoo until next week. I hope you know that." You had walked most of the way with him back to the studio. Seas of somber, dark concrete crosswalks with white lines and faceless beings in sometimes nice clothes had shrunk from a hearty basin of converging intersections to a gentle downstream trickle of interweaving streets that housed residences and hidden businesses. "Sunday is my only day off. I don't make exceptions for anyone."

Getō stayed with you the entire time, his movements a little more sluggish than you were used to seeing since you didn't have the same leg reach as him. He could probably open up his arms and touch buildings on either side of the street with the blunt nails on his long fingers.

You wondered, briefly, to your shame, if he could wrap himself around you twice if you were to do it first.

"I know," he said, an affable smile in his eyes and curved onto his lips. The look of him grew even brighter when he noticed you were staring, your face blemished by creases and lines and uneasy, fluttering eyeballs that conveyed your distrust and intrigue all at once. "What? You don't believe me? My back is still healing from the last session. I think you went deeper with the needles than previous times. It's taking longer."

You probably did bury ink deeper into the pretty flesh on his back because he upset your employee—your only employee, your safeguard to a successful business.

"Remember, you signed a waiver about infection. If there's too much redness and swelling, you should get it looked at." It wasn't often any interest to you to give unsolicited advice outside the shop, but Getō was your special exception. "I'm not going to touch your back again until that's completely ruled out. Besides, the dragon is done, so now we're just adding all your weird folklore and buddhist iconography."

"Hard to believe we've made it all these months." he said, now standing with you outside the building you rented for your studio and second-floor apartment. Despite the nylon straps on his arms digging cavernous divots into his black sleeves, he didn't act as though he were carrying around bags of lead like you felt you with yours. "I couldn't have chosen a better artist. I wasn't lying when I said your online portfolio was one of the best I'd seen in Tokyo, by the way."

What he said still sounded so sweetly untrue, but you unlocked the old door with a grimy brass key and let him inside to take his shoes off in the entryway and climb the stairs behind you to the second floor.

"I never have guests, so I don't really have anything for you. Coffee? Tea? Water? I may have some orange juice left." Every inch of tiny countertop and kitchen floor was swallowed by plastic totes and your bodies. It didn't occur to you at that moment to try putting some things away first to make more room, so you stumbled through the mess for your one-cup coffee machine that doubled as your tea kettle. "Sorry for the mess, I guess. I spend most of my time working, so I don't get the chance to clean up very often."

Getō betrayed no emotion, didn't seem afflicted in the slightest by the state of your apartment, and kept the curl of his smile fastened all the time. "Tea is fine. I'll just take whatever is easiest for you."

Minutes later, he politely sipped from the rim of your favorite mug, one hip implanted into the edge of the counter, staved off from helping you unload your groceries because you told him it'd be weird for a yakuza boss to do that. He still tried to take some boxes of stuff and stick them in your cabinets when you weren't looking, though.

“Did you tell that guy about me?” The sound of your voice, sudden and suspicious, was enough to startle Getō into a wide-eyed stare. He asked you what you meant, so you told him, “That guy back at the intersection you were with. Who was he? He knew my name. I saw him. Is he one of your gang friends?”

The alarm sank out of his expression, tension in his shoulders along with it. Despite the severity of your questions, he barely seemed to register them seriously and resumed stacking things on shelves to clear the countertops.

“Getō.” you pressed.

“No.” He closed the cabinet once he finished and came to you, undaunted by the obstacles spaced out on the floor. “I didn't tell him about you. I've kept my word. He's an annoying shit who likes snooping around my business.”

“Then, how did he…”

You receded into your thoughts, now trying harder than before to recall who that man was. His identity was tilted there on the edge of your memory, one word or phrase or image away from awestruck revelation. When it finally happened, seconds later, Getō was in front of you, heavy hands on your upper arms as though keeping you upright, and face bright with intrigue.

“Wait. Wait. Wait!” You cried out. “Gojō as in financial Gojō? As in one of the richest families in Japan, Gojō? Gold spoon baby Gojō?”

Getō gave a jubilant laugh as though delighted by you figuring it out on your own. His hands rose higher on your arms, capping your shoulders in warm weight that felt as refreshing as it did unusual. You couldn't remember the last time someone had touched you like that.

“He's my best friend—my only one. I'm not surprised he was able to figure out I was getting work done at your shop.” He said lightly, but doing nothing to assuage your doubt. “I know you don't believe it, but he's good to know if you need help. I'll give you his number so you—”

“I don't want it.” you said with feeble resolve. “It’s already a pain in the ass enough to have yakuza hanging around all the time. I don't need some trust fund baby to know where I live, too.”

Your heart wasn't in those words, finding that all you could concentrate on was the space of his palms encapsulating your shoulders, deft fingers leaving marks in your clothes as though trying to feel your skin through fabric. He didn't allow himself to roam you, but the taut muscles in his hands revealed a sort of composed restraint that was close to snapping.

He said your name once; a low, raspy sound in his throat that seemed so much like him yet unlike anything you had heard leave his mouth before. His eyes were darkened by his lashes, mesmerizing you in some dreamlike haze that only intensified when he stooped his head to kiss you.

His lips found rhythm with yours; slow, at first, to test the feeling and how much either of you actually wanted this. You responded with quiet sounds, a sigh and a moan, followed by the spread of your arms reaching around his neck to bring him closer, feel him more.

Getō backed your body against the countertop and leaned forward on his hands behind you to press down harder into the kiss. The blunt edges of your fingernails dove through black downy hairs on the back of his neck, trailing further down the ridges of his spine, molding to the ridges of his vertebrae that pushed up below the surface of his skin.

Goose flesh marked him all over, breath stuttering in your mouth like he was stifling pleasurable sounds of his own. You expected more self-control from a man of his status, yet there he was melting into you and sucking the air from your lungs while tasting your tongue with the roughness of his.

There was an ache between your legs, unabated heat which you had forgotten could be stimulated by another person. You weren't ashamed to take care of yourself when the need arose, although even those instances were far and few between and lacked this same urgency—this need to have another person wrapped up in you, touching you, devouring you.

You thought about how bad of an idea this was, how Kōji would react if he knew how weak your willpower truly was. It made sense to expect someone like Getō to exert his influence over you like this, for him to give into his every impulse without fear of consequence because there simply was none for him. He was above needing to restrain his inhibitions if that's what he wanted in the end.

“I can make you feel good.” He said apart from your lips, now pressed into the underside of your jaw after stretching out the neckline of your shirt. “Tell me what you want. I'll do it. I've wanted you since the beginning.”

What would happen if you told him to strip off your pants and get on his knees? Would the kingpin of the Uzumaki-kai obey someone lesser and bow and swallow the nectar from your body? Would he laugh at your brazen attempt, call you a wretch and drag you away for trying to make a mockery of him?

“Just… touch me.” Those words were not your own.

“Where?” Getō’s hands left the countertop to pile underneath your shirt, hands a light caress against the skin on your lower back. The heat of them made you flinch. “Here? Tell me where you want me.”

Something about this was too surreal, stirred unease in your chest and hundreds of quivering butterflies in your gut. It had come on as suddenly and dimmed the lust in your groin, lifted the fog from your eyes and cotton in your brain. It left you pliant in his arms, yet far away in mind as you searched those deeper recesses of yourself for an answer.

Getō noticed the disconnect and passionless kiss, your lips barely taking shape against his, and lifted his hands off of you.

“What's wrong?” He asked.

“I—” Something about you. “I don't know. This is just unprofessional. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done it.”

There was still darkness in his eyes, emotions shimmering through them despite an effortless smile he secured on his face. It was an eerie mask this time around, but your vulnerability and reddened, bruised neck kept you from saying anything on it.

“I should be the one apologizing.” Getō said with that unshakable calmness of his. “I didn't have the intention to push myself on you. I just thought…” He tilted his head a little left, tempting you to lean with him. “I thought we wanted the same thing.”

You couldn't answer that truthfully because then this would never end and he'd wind up in your bed. Had he been any other man, you'd have stripped him down to nothing and let him ravage you as he said he would.

But, you couldn't because he was your client.

You couldn't because of who he was.

You couldn't because he liked to keep his secrets close to his chest, and while you had your neck exposed—warm, sucking lips at your jaw and on the small swells in your throat when you'd swallow—you realized you couldn't trust him not to sink his teeth in and rip out gore and stringy sinew and let you bleed out on the floor.

He knew that distrust, had probably seen in everyone he’d ever known, yet he kept that smile which had grown stiff.

“It's not a good idea, Getō.” Because there's something off about you. You're a wolf masquerading as a shepherd. “Of all people, you should know that.”

Getō said nothing else as he was led downstairs and let out into the brisk evening air. Briefly, you worried he would feel the chill through this baggy sweatshirt and had to think better of fetching him a scarf for the trip back to wherever he belonged.

You stayed behind the door near the stairs, leaning through it far enough for him to reach out and stroke your face with the peaks of his knuckles. It was a fleeting touch, perhaps an attempt to not overstep as he had before.

And then, just before he pulled away, he said something familiar, “I'll see you soon.”

━◦○◦━◦○◦━━◦○◦━◦○◦━━◦○◦━◦○◦━

a/n: so i started this project late last year, i think. i put it aside after i started working on my original android x reader oneshot (which is posted and y'all should read it *hint**hint*) but i'm picking this back up to finish it.

originally, i was going to post this in its entirety once it was finished (est. 20k-22k), but decided just to get this out of my face and do the other half separately. if y'all wanna see the second half and conclusion to this please reblog and interact with this!! if i don't really gauge any interest in it, i don't really see the point in putting my time into finishing it.

the second half has the sex scene and all the drama and stuff.

anyway, deuces!

#getou x reader #getou suguru #geto x reader #jjk geto #geto suguru #jujutsu geto #getō suguru #jjk suguru #getou suguru x reader #suguru x reader #suguru geto #suguru x you #suguru x y/n #suguru geto x reader #suguru geto x you #suguru geto x y/n #jjk x you #jjk imagines #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen #2k writes #writing #reader insert #reader interactive

[secondhandsorrows]

Some Vital Scenes to Include in a Romantic Subplot, pt. 1

I’ve been in the plotting stages of a novel I’ve been working on for some time now. It’s not a romance novel, per se, but the romantic aspect is very prevalent… dare I say important. Anyway, so as I was working on my scenes and character arcs, I began to realize that I didn’t have enough fleshed-out about romantic arc, nor deepened the protagonist’s love interest or their connection, for that matter. This led me to devise up some scenes that I felt were crucial to the story if I wanted to keep this romantic angle to it, and now that I’ve most of them arranged, I find now that I’m way more excited about my characters’ love story. 

These tips will be unnumbered because, obviously, the sequence of these events and how they will fall into your storyline will probably be different. Also, you don’t have to use only one scene for every suggestion that will be mentioned, as you can have multiple scenes of flirtations or deep conversations, for example. They usually blend all together into the narrative at this point. Just remember that there should be some relevance to the plot at hand in some of these scenes as to not derail completely from the main narrative or other conflicts.

I was going to post this all at once, but decided it was too long and wanted to split it into two parts to go more in-depth and for easy reading. /-\ Enjoy ~

- The meet-cute, or the meet-ugly:

Ah, yes, the first encounter. Or, as we sometimes like to call it: the meet-cute, or the meet-ugly if you’re feeling a little unconventional or perhaps mischievous. Though we may enjoy setting up our star-crossed characters in a whole range of moments from awkward to swoon-worthy, the initial meeting is what’s important (if your characters haven't already met before the beginning of the story, ofc, but this is useful to have in mind). Let us quickly define the two:

Meet-Cute: A charming and serendipitous first encounter between the characters in question that sets a positive, memorable, and oftentimes romantic tone.

Meet-Ugly: An unconventional, awkward, or disastrous initial meeting that adds a unique twist to the start of the romantic connection, often leading to unexpected chemistry and an added intrigue on whether or not they’ll get together.

You don’t have to nail your characters’ first encounter into a label or bubble such as these two examples, but I like bringing these up for a general idea. 

- Bouts of flirting and/or banter:

Just as the title suggests, these are scenes containing the flirtaious communication between the two characters. These kinds of interactions will, of course, develop over time and deepen the bond or relationship. Playful interactions, gazes, and witty exchanges between the characters can create a lighthearted and flirtatious atmosphere that hints at their growing attraction.

The way they might flirt or tease can reveal their personalities. For example, one character might be more sarcastic, while the other responds with quick wit, or quiet bashfulness. There’s an element of subtlety, as flirting lets the characters express their romantic interest without explicitly stating it (unless one of your characters lacks subtlety in general and prefers to shout their undying love from the rooftops, which would make for an interesting dynamic, but I’m only spit-balling). 

Banter, teasing, and romantic tension underscoring heated debates or loathsome gazes suit just as nicely, especially if you’re writing with enemies-to-lovers or rivalry tropes in mind. But be careful! A little goes a long way: too much all at once can repel any growth for the characters or narrative.

- Initial conflict or struggle:

Depending on your story’s big-picture conflict, the introduction of challenges or obstacles can create tension between the characters, adding depth to their relationship and making their eventual connection all the more satisfying. This might include cultural or class differences, opposing goals or values, history of past heartbreak, personality weaknesses such as stubbornness, or external pressures that threaten to keep the characters apart. Even a nosy family or a disapproving mother can be considered. How the characters navigate and resolve these conflicts contributes significantly to the overall emotional impact of the romance subplot, as well as allowing for some exploration of each character's strengths, weaknesses, and resilience. 

- Shared vulnerability:

This kind of scene involves the characters opening up to each other about their innermost fears, insecurities, past trauma, or personal struggles. Shared vulnerability goes beyond surface-level interactions. It involves characters revealing their authentic selves, exposing their emotional vulnerabilities, and allowing the other person to see them in an honest — and sometimes new — light.

This is a symbolic gesture of commitment we’re talking about, here… something that requires trust. As characters share their fears or past traumas, they are entrusting the other person with sensitive information, fostering a sense of trust and emotional intimacy. It might be scary, it could be out from left field, but they will end up learning something new about themselves, their situation, or about the other person, and thus deepen their connection, little by little.

#writing advice #creative writing #fiction #writing #writing tips #character #on writing #story tips #story conflict #writing process #writer stuff #writer #writeblr #writing help #how to write #writing resources #writing tips and tricks #writers on tumblr #writers and poets #writerscommunity #subplot #romance #writing romance #writing characters

[vintagenahbi]

Finding Out You’re Pregnant

Ot7 x Reader- BTS Reactions Pt. 1

JHope, Suga, Jimin

Summary: How each member reacts to finding out you are pregnant.

Warnings: mentions of miscarriage, feeling overwhelmed

Authors Note: I may or may not post the second part. I am trying to see what I want the focus of my blog to be about. I hope you enjoy and sorry if it gets deleted :(

JHope

I took a deep breathe as I opened my eyes. My body went completely numb. I quickly slammed the test back on the bathroom counter. I picked it up once more and tossed it in the trash. I flushed the toilet, walking out as if nothing happened.

Hoseok was lying on the bed scrolling through his phone. He looked up at me and smiled.

“Rough in there?” I stood there staring at him not knowing how to respond. In a daze from the events that had taken place in the bathroom only moments ago. I silently prayed that he did not notice the change in my behavior, but my mind was racing to the point that I couldn’t even- “Baby?” He said. I shifted my attention in his direction.

“Yes.” I knew in the moment he could tell something was bothering me. I walked over to the bed and slowly laid down next to him. He watched my every move.

“Was it rough in there?” He repeated.

“No, no.” I awkwardly laugh. “Im a little out of it. I don’t know, I- I shouldn’t have eaten all that food.” He stares at me blankly, not believing a single word that I am saying. I don’t blame him. I have never been good with hiding things, especially when it came to Hoseok. The thought of even having to tell him what I know scared me senseless. I wasn’t tired, but I knew I could no longer take this one sided awkwardness that I had created.

“Goodnight.” I blurted as I turned pulling the covers over my head. There was only two reactions that could come from Hoseok after that- laughter or what’s gotten into you. As usual it is the latter.

Hoseok shifts his body against the headboard. He lightly shoves my shoulder. I don’t budge, hoping he believes that I am asleep. Again, he lightly nudges my shoulder.

“I know you’re not asleep” Hoseok quietly said. I sigh and sit back up. “What’s bothering you”. I know that I can tell Hoseok anything, but in this moment I wasn’t ready, but I would be wrong if I kept this a secret. He has dreams and a career that he loves. I on the other hand, was just getting started.

“Y/N?” I looked him in the eyes. With the little courage I had I softly blurted it out.

“I’m pregnant”

“You’re pregnant? How do you know? How did this happen?” Every question came one after another. I know Hoseok loves me, but I took offense to nearly every question he had. It felt like my world was slowly caving in and I was left to figure it all out on my own.

“I missed my period and took the test- positive.”

“Where is it?” I looked at him confused. “Where is the test i want to see it.” I pointed to the bathroom door.

“In the trash.” Hoseok swiftly got out of the bed and darted into our bathroom. I heard him open the lid of the trash can and it close within seconds. I wasn’t surprised that it happened quickly. I made no tempt to hide it from him- yet I still felt disappointed in myself. He stood at the doorway holding the test. “I mean… I don’t know really know what to say Y/N”.

I looked away from Hoseok with tears forming in my eyes. For some reason this situation was breaking my heart. I felt that I was in the wrong and Hoseok wasn’t making me feel any better. He’s always been known as his happy chipper self, but deep down there was much more depth to him. He wasn’t mean or anything- he was complex which was one of the many reasons why I loved him, but in this moment I needed him to be happy to take my mind off of the fact that I was about to have a baby. My baby. Our baby.

“I’m sorry.” I quietly whispered. Hoseok looked up at me and rushed over to my side. He kneeled down in front of me as the tears slowly flowed down my cheeks. I tried to discreetly wipe them away before he could see.

“No, no, no. I’m not upset. I’m sorry. I’m surprised is all. We weren’t planning for a baby right now, but we’ll be okay”. He puts his hand on my stomach. I start to chuckle a little because there is absolutely no bump present as I continue to wipe my tears away. He rubs my stomach and I stop- just watching him.

“We’re having a baby Hobi.” I place my hand over his.

“We’re having a baby. I’m gonna be a dad.” He holds my hand tightly “I’m gonna be a dad.”

Suga

It was a late night and I was not feeling well at all. Yoongi was starting to notice more as he finished cleaning up the kitchen from our dinner earlier. I heard the water running and my head started to pound immediately. The sound alone was making me feel worse by the minute. A type of headache I had never experienced before in my life. No hangover compared to this.

“Stop!” I blurted out. Yoongi looked at me perplexed. He turned off the water.

“Are you okay?” He said in a concerning tone.

“Everything seems so loud. I really don’t feel good Yoongi. I don’t know what’s going on.” Yoongi walked over to me. He grabbed my hand gently, running his thumb across the palm of my hand. A tear slowly fell down my cheek. I felt like I couldn’t control myself. “I don’t feel good.”

“Okay, let’s get you to bed and in the morning we will go to the doctor, okay?” I shook my head yes. I got up from the couch and went into our bedroom. I turned off the lights and snuggled up under my favorite peach blanket with my Hello Kitty plushie in my arms. Even though I was grown, I was still a child at heart which Yoongi admired about me. But he loved when I was tough. In this moment, I felt bad for not being tough and pushing through the pain because I know he hates to see me this way.

I jolted up from my sleep in the middle of the night abruptly. A sharp pain ran across my lower abdomen. I couldn’t help but to yelp out grabbing my stomach in the process. Yoongi woke up and placed his hand against my back. I could see the panic on his face.

“I think we should go to the hospital” He nodded his head and we headed to the hospital. The car ride was painful and felt like it took an eternity to get there.

Once we arrived, I got out of the car and could feel something damp on my butt. That is when I noticed blood on the back of my pants. Yoongi had seemed to notice too. Suddenly, it hit me what was happening. Everything from that point went in slow motion.

I was sitting in the hospital bed as they explained everything. I had been seven weeks pregnant and had a miscarriage. I was pregnant and in the same day I found out I lost the baby.

Yoongi and I thanked the doctor- then sat in silence. My mind was racing. It felt like it was my fault but how could it be when I didn’t know. No morning sickness, no symptoms, just me not tracking my period. I looked over at Yoongi who was trying to be strong for the both of us.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t even know.” I broke the silence.

“It’s not your fault. We will try again. I can’t believe we were even going to be parents.” He quickly swiped under his eyes. “You would’ve been a great mom Y/N. We will try again.” His voice trailed off.

Jimin

“Y/N, I’m not sure about kids now.” My heart dropped. This was not the best time to be hearing this. It was our third anniversary and now he is telling me he’s not sure about kids. Well, there goes my big surprise.

He takes another bite of his food. I was looking at the crowd of people on the other side of the restaurant. Jimin made sure to reserve the balcony space for the two of us. I saw the waiter coming over with my surprise dessert and I motioned for him to go away.

“What are you doing?” Raising his eyebrow. I smiled.

“Nothing”

“You know I am so glad to have you in my life. It’s nice having someone to share life with. I used to be alone. I spent most of my days quietly, then you came along and everything changed.”

“That’s sweet Jimin” I got quiet for a second. “Why don’t you want kids?”

“Honestly, I’m scared. I’m not sure if I’m ready”

“I don’t think anyone is ever ready when they have kids Jimin. I think you’d make a great dad and I’d be the mother which is even better. And-” He looked at me and smirked. I stopped myself from rambling off more than I had.

“Let me guess, you’re pregnant.” All the blood in my body rushed to my feet. I went cold. I stared at him surprised by his comment. He started to chuckle. I didn’t know how to react.

The waiter came over and placed the dessert in front of him. It was a layered crepe cake with the words “congratulations mom and dad.” It was cheesy, but the best I could come up with. He looked at it and smiled.

“How’d you know?” He starts to laugh.

“Y/N it was so obvious. I was waiting for you to tell me. You left the test in the bathroom not to mention the random morning sickness that was because of my “cooking”. The signs were everywhere, but I wanted you to tell me.”

“Then why make that comment Jimin? You scared me!”

“You were taking too long. Of course I want to be a dad to our children. I’m still scared, but I know as long as I’m with you, we will do anything to make it work.” He grabs my hand and kisses it. He gets up from his seat and gets on one knee. He pulls out that small blue box and opens it. I can’t help but start to cry. Overcome with so many emotions. “Y/N will you be the mother of my child and my wife?” I shake my head yes. He slips the ring on my ring finger. He gets up and goes back to his seat.

“So the wedding before or after the baby comes?”

“Before hopefully. 5 months to plan is manageable.” He said.

“I’ll be seven months by then”

“Wait you’re two months pregnant?” I shook my head yes. He sat back in his chair. In that moment I knew it hit him. He was about to be a dad.

#bts #bts suga #bts jimin #bts jhope #jhope #min yoogni #park jimin #bts imagines #bts reactions #bts x reader #bts fanfic #bts reader #suga imagine #jimin imagine #jhope imagine #jhope x reader #suga x reader #jimin x reader

[bloomingdayswithyou]

hey!! I loved your obey me fic, could you do the same for simeon solomon barbatos and diavolo?? ik the limit is 3 but still🥺🥺

How would they flirt with MC (pt. 2)

Author’s note: thanks for the request! I will do the 4 of them.

You can check pt. 1 here

1. Simeon:

Simeon’s interactions with mc would be all about kindness, compassion and a gentle demeanor.

Since he’s from the Celestial Realm, his flirting style is refined and respectful. He would often offer words of encouragement and support, acknowledging her efforts and accomplishments in the demon realm.

His affectionate gestures would reflect his caring nature, as he seeks to protect and guide her during her time at RAD.

He might offer to accompany her on excursions or help her with her studies, aiming to make her feel comfortable and at ease in unfamiliar surroundings.

His compliments would be sincere and heartfelt, focusing on her pure heart and inner strength. Simeon would be drawn to her ability to see the good in others, admiring her compassionate nature and genuine desire to help those around her.

He might write poetry or compose songs dedicated to her, expressing his admiration and appreciation to her presence in his life.

His gentle yet unwavering affection would serve as a guiding light, bringing comfort and solace during challenging times.

2. Solomon:

In Solomon’s case, his interactions would be intriguing and enigmatic.

His flirting style would involve a blend of charm, mystery and wit. He enjoys teasing and testing mc, all the while displaying a captivating charm that draws her in.

He would engage her in playful banter, demonstrating his vast knowledge and understanding of magic. He might share tales of his adventures or challenges, aiming to impress her with his skills and accomplishments.

In his company, mc would be drawn to the thrill of the unknown, finding excitement in the unpredictability of her interactions.

His compliments would be clever and eloquent, praising her intellect, adaptability and bravery. He would also value her ability to face challenges head-on and admire her curiosity for the unknown.

He might offer her magical trinkets or artifacts, personalized to suit her interests and strengths, as a way of expressing his appreciation for her presence in his life.

As their relationship progresses, Solomon’s guarded exterior will soften, revealing glimpses of vulnerability and sincerity.

He would gradually share more about his past and emotions, allowing mc to see the depths of his true self.

In this moments of intimacy, mc would witness a side of Solomon that few others have experienced, creating a unique and profound connection between them.

3. Barbatos:

Barbatos’ interactions would be marked by a sense of elegance. He would be attentive to her needs and preferences, often anticipating her desires before she even expresses them.

His filtration would involve thoughtful gestures, such as arranging her schedule or organizing special events tailored to her ability to inspire and lead others to her interests. He might prepare tea or snacks for her, ensuring that every detail is perfect.

His compliments would be subtle yet sincere, focusing on her grace, charm and unique qualities.

Barbatos would admire her ability to inspire and lead others, acknowledging her natural charisma and the positive impact she has on those around her.

He would hold her in high stem, viewing her as an important and valued presence in the Royal House of Devildom.

Beyond his professionalism, he might offer glimpses of his caring caring nature and concern for her well-being. He would be discreet and respectful, creating a sense of trust that allows mc to confide in him.

His calming presence would provide a sense of stability and security, creating a strong bond between them as she navigates the challenges of her role in the demon realm.

4. Diavolo:

His interactions would be marked by a sense of warmth, charm and royalty. He takes an active interest in her progress and well-being, seeing her as a potential ally and friend.

Diavolo’s filtration would be a delicate dance of compliments and playful banter. He would engage her in lively conversations, showcasing his vibrant personality and genuine interest in getting to know her.

He might invite her to various events and activities, ensuring that she experiences the grandeur and splendor of the Devildom.

His compliments would be grand and genuine, focusing on her potential and unique abilities.

Diavolo would see her as a beacon of hope and potential for unity between Celestial Realm and the Devildom, acknowledging her role as a crucial figure in the story of the realms.

While his royal duties might sometimes keep him busy, he would always make time for mc, expressing his care and appreciation for her companionship.

He might seek her counsel on important matters, valuing her insights and opinions.

As their relationship deepens, Diavolo’s affections would become evident, creating a sense of camaraderie and trust that spans beyond the realms they inhabit.

.

.

.

#obey me #obey me fanfic #obey me imagines #obey me headcanons #obey me x reader #obey me simeon #simeon x reader #obey me solomon #solomon x reader #obey me diavolo #diavolo x reader #obey me barbatos #barbatos x reader

[thementalshawty]

Hayyyyloooooooww I’m back back back! Been awhile since I’ve done readings for tumblr (*Deleted my last page) Anywho I’m back and better than ever! Soo let’s get back to business babies!!

Free PAC Readings

📕📗📘📙📕📘📗📙📕📘📕📘📙📖📓📒

Love Readings

.

.

Fs Series 18+ (I use explicit language in all readings 🤷🏽‍♀️ you’ve been warned)

Who’s Your Future Spouse? Introducing them Pt .1

Who’s Your Future Spouse Pt.2

What’s their current energy?

What’s their shadow side?

Messages from your FS

Meeting them?

Impressions?

How will they ask you out? (Confession)

How will they pursue you (woo you).

Your first date?

Your first kiss

Early Stages Dynamics

Serious Relationship Dynamic

Problems in your relationship?

Favorite things to do together!

How will they make you feel?

How will you make them feel?

Proposal

Your Vibe As A Couple

Your Wedding

Life After Marriage!

What Their Family Thinks Of You?

What your family thinks of them?

What’s the soul contract with them?

Words to describe your relationship, Traits of your FS or Ultimate Person & A Quick Message

Where are you??

Letter From Your FS/Soulmate ❤️🪽😠🌸

Your Connection With Your Spouse

10 Facts About Your Spouse

Facts & Deets About Your Wedding Day

FS Series Sexual Readings 🤤 18+

Your First Time Together

Your Sexual Dynamic

Your Sexual Chemistry

Favorite Sexual Activities Together

Your honeymoon

Sex Life After Marriage

What Turns You On About Them?

What Turns Them On About You

Sexual Messages From Your FS

Their Naughty Dreams About You?

Random PAC Readings

Yes/No

Messages from Ancestors

Your current energy

What’s that feeling mean?

What’s coming in?

Tough love from spirit!

Your Past life Story

Your Cosmic Origins 🌌

Your Mythical Origins

Your Gifts & Abilities

What Couples you Vibe like?

What songs sum up your connection

Your crush

You and your next partner

I Will Try To Get Them Done Not In Order Sooooo 🤷🏽‍♀️

💰💵💶💷💴🤑💷💰💶💷💸💰

I do offer paid Readings for more in-depth specific answers based on you specifically remember the general readings are for the collective soo take what resonates let the rest roll off!

Cashapp & Paypal (PayPal is a dollar more because of fees so keep that in mind please babes)

Love package readings you can choose 2 to 3 questions from the masterlist or ask up to 3 questions of your choice- 25$ includes sexual questions

Career Package Readings -25$ 1-3 Questions.

General Questions Package 15$ 2-4questions not about career or love.

Combo packages. It can be a combination of general, love or career questions 1-3 questions.-45$

Love Question- Only one Question off the masterlist or one question of your choice -5$ Includes sexual questions, Disclaimer: THIS LOVE QUESTION IS A ONE CARD PULL ONLY!! *Expect a short reading from this. (One paragraph type short).

General Questions: 1 card pull 3$, 3 card pull 16$, 5 card pull-20$, 8 Card pull-35$

If you want extra cards pulled from custom decks for any reading it’s 5$ extra. (So many custom decks)!

I also accept subscribing to my music and me on all platforms as a form of payment for personal readings, it counts as a one question 3 card pull reading.

NEW VOICE READINGS! This is a new feature, I will get in so much detail in your personal readings through a thorough and detailed voice recording.

1 Min- 1 card pull- 2$

5 Min- 3 Card Pull- 10$

15 Min-5 card pull- 25$

30 min - 8 card pull- 40$

1Hr- 10-15 Card Pull- 80$

🖊️ 🖊️🖊️🖊️🖊️🖊️🖊️🖊️🖊️

Exchange Game

Tarot Events

Celebration Event

🎵 🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵🎵

My music: ⬇️⬇️⬇️

TICC TOCC IS OUT YALLL

Here

Here

Here

Here

Here

Here

Here

Here

💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞💞

Follow me on IG:@thementalshawty

Subscribe

To my YouTube:

My Linktree

My patreon as well!!!!

Thanks babessssss 💋 see ya there!

Tips are always appreciated for your favorite 😍!

Welcome me back now!!!!! 💋 I know you missed me! 😂 😝

#pick a card #tarot reading #pick a pile #tarot cards #pac reading #tarot pac #psychic #tarot community #tarotblr #love tarot reading #tarot tumblr #tarot #witches #tarot witch #pagan witch #divination readings #divination #paid readings #thementalshawty #musician #lgbtq musicians #new music

[waywardsou2]

Bad Batch content Master Post

My analysis of the finale - an in depth deep dive at the events of Season 3 Episode 15

Official Master Post - this is an updated list of content for the Summer of Bad Batch prompt challenge

Future Head Canon Poll

General Head Canons Pt. 1

Tech Head canons

Shirtless trans cuddles head canons

Waking from a nightmare head canons

Open and Awaiting arrival - request information here

General Tech Head Canons from autism bugs

Sleeping with the Shooter - A platonic Crosshair x GN!Reader / M!Reader comfort

[All of my bullshit from watching the Bad Batch to the aftermath]

Unpolished Wrecker Head canon

Gushing over the clones

A Tech / Emery theory

The Clones are people first

Fic poll

Echo and Rex

Man, I miss Tech

Tech fans, I see you!

May The Fourth Art

Bad Batch ask game response

Crosshair quote got me in a chokehold

Crosshair was a goodie

Post The Bad Batch finale rant

Silly Omega crossover head canon

Platonic / Romantic Rant

Young Crosshair and Hunter dynamic

Fanboy-ing over DBB

"Mothers" Day

Rex is blonde?!

Thinking about fives hour

Modern AU Clone names

How do you feel about Darth Maul

I finished watching the Clone Wars for the first time

My Bad Batch ask game

My head canon about Tech and Wrecker

Is Omega trans?

Hunter's fall vs Tech's fall

Star Wars ask

Poor Wolffe

Warning about content stealers

[Content under this banner is either advertising for my ao3 content where I will write actual fics or one-shots that are continuing on, which will also be on my ao3 as well]

Our brother (a Tech fix-it fic)

Summer of Bad Batch all content!

Official Master Post

Week 1 - Main prompt pt. 1

Week 1 - Main prompt pt. 2

Week 1 - Alt prompt

#master post #master list #head canons #requests #one shots #reader x character #masterpost #navigation #headcanon #headcanons #my head canons #my head canon #head canon #the bad batch #tbb #bad batch #the bad bad master post #bad batch content master post #requests open #request open #request #reqs open #requests are open #fanfiction

[ekowolf]

Strong for Someone Else Pt.1

She only had a little farther to go. One elevator ride. A few more steps. She could picture it, she just needs to get there and then she can close her eyes. The darkness haloed around her vision, a tunnel closing in on her.

Almost there.

She feels the elevator lurch to a stop, an ear splitting sound that was probably not even loud but made her flinch, the doors sliding open. It took an incredible effort to pull away from the cold steel wall that was holding her upright.

Almost there.

The warm snake of blood made its long journey down a scorching pathway of her exposed back.

Her feet were barely holding her upright anymore as every step she took almost made her cry out trying to make it to her destination.

She knows why she was unceremoniously dropped on the cracked concrete steps of this particular building. She knows she is a bomb. Not a real one by any means, unless her brother had more up his sleeve. No, she was an emotional bomb, the shrapnel rigged to explode as soon as she made it to them—to her. But right now she couldn’t seem to care that Lex was once again using her. She just needs Kara.

Almost there.

The door was just ahead of her as she gripped the hallway with all her might as she used the sturdy walls as a crutch. The bloody smears she was leaving in her wake adorning the off-white walls like a trail of breadcrumbs back—back to where her brother had once again tried to destroy her. Maybe ‘tried’ is no longer applicable here.

Not after today.

Not after…

Her last few steps seem to feel longer than every previous step combined. Heavy. Everything was heavy. She was beginning to slide into the darkness that was waiting in the depths to consume her. Her chest was on fire with every heaved breath.

Last step.

She could hear the lively commotion of Friday night game night even though the sounds sounded like they were underwater. Or was she underwater? Still?

She couldn’t tell anymore. The cold wet strands of her hair laid limply against her equally frigid skin as a reminder.

As she reached out for her favorite door a whimper escaped her lips bloody, swollen and bruised. She let it’s wooden structure catch her as if it had arms to reach out for her.

She held onto it, her bloody forehead falling forward against its cool wood. She could feel a tear pool on her lashes and fall away—even its weight she couldn’t carry.

Her hands were stained red and bracketing her head, unfurled fingers outstretched in a type of surrender.

What she was surrendering to she didn’t know.

Was there anything left of her broken body to surrender?

Was she late to game night? Kara was probably texting her to see if she lost track of time working on her latest aquifer project. Kara cajoling her to leave the rest for tomorrow, that it would be there in the morning.

She imagined the adorable wording and string of emojis she always received when she was late for game night with her friends. The offer to fly and pick her up would usually come after the emojis that sent her heart fluttering, “what’s the fun if you can’t use Air-Kara every now and again, Lena!” She felt herself smile at the memory. She let another small whimper as even smiling was painful now.

She knew she was going to taint this event—game night is sacred—possibly for all time but it was too late, Lex had won this time.

Her standing here broken was his victory lap.

#had to get this out #supercorp #supergirl #lena luthor #kara danvers #katie mcgrath #ao3 #no sleep club #supercorp ficlet #SoundCloud #trauma #supercorp fanfiction #supercorp fanfic #fanfiction

[technologyculturedneo]

SOS: Poison In My Mind (Pt 1)

PLAYING NOW: Season 2 of SOS: AM I ALIVE

“We met in the worst circumstance possible, but yet, even if we had to meet in different circumstances, I’d still fall for you.”

SUMMARY. A series of events following the aftermath of the break in/hostage situation has everyone feeling tense. The Zhong family is torn with disappoints, from Yezi deciding that she wants to keep the rape baby, to Dae leaving the family wanting something else from her life. With months and years treading by, the family is met again in uncanny situations with the same old boys who can’t seem to get away from them.

PAIRING(s). Delinquent!Mark, Felony!Haechan, Boyfriend!Jeno, Brother!Renjun; Policeman!Jaemin, Jisung; Husband!Chenle, Boyfriend!Jaehyun X OC Dae, Yezi (original character)

GENRE. Angst. Longshot. Slow burn. Crime. Strangers to lovers. Smut (non-consensual/consensual). Family.

WARNINGS. Drugs abuse (Alcohol, smoking, marijuana, cocaine, heroin). Sexual content (consensual, child abuse, pedophile). Slow burn (unlike the first book filled with edge and action, here’s a more toned down and summary filled action after the aftermath, lots of convo.)

S2: EP1-7 The moment the judge hits the gavel, Dae unknowingly lets out a sigh of relief. Laying her head against her dad's shoulder, some tears pouring out of her eyes causing her to hiccup, sniff and fall into a breaking emotional state. Her dad, Chenle hugs her tightly. He feels such an overwhelming amount of pain. He doesn't even know what to say when he watches the police handcuff the boys and makes them line up against the opposite doors, preparing them for their new prison life.

Dae gets her head off his shoulder and with her eyes smudged in tears and nose running just as badly, her face red and voice barely above a whisper. "Dad, I can't breathe," She hiccups terribly struggling to say.

Chenle is attentive and assists her up as he navigates her outside of the Court room. With his arms around her shoulder, he walks with her steadily and his eyes peer around trying to find a specific door, which was right next to the court room. Entering into the room whereby his wife and Yezi are, his heart grows heavy upon seeing Yezi in a similar dreadful position crying her soul out.

Yezi upon seeing her dad gets up as well and runs into her dad's arms. Chenle holds tight, embracing them generously the same way when they cried that he and his ex-wife were splitting. His lips kiss the top of their precious heads just as his eyes shut by the overflow of tears bluring his vision. His daughters sadly crying only causes his heart more pain that as their father he couldn't protect them against the evil of the world. Chungdae, Chenle's wife gets up slowly and makes her way towards her family. She moves behind Chenle and back hugs him, her own tears building up.

Yezi and Dae stretch their arms in sync backwards to wrap around Chungdae. No matter how much she was reminded of being their step mum, no matter how much she fought with Yezi, no matter how much Dae was nice to her without actually allowing her to know her real feelings, and no matter how much Chenle tried to always make her feel a part of his family even though deep down she knew she had a long way to acceptance with the whole family, right now being here with them somehow feels like a new level of depth.

The fact that she cut her trip half way- once her plane landed and Chenle called her to tell her the details she booked the next flight back- and came to serve as support for the girls as well as her husband who continuously blamed himself. It's like she had unlocked a new sacred bound with each and every one of them- although it was because of a traumatic experience, she’s somehow happy to feel included in their suffering of the moment.

Chenle loved his kids, and as Chungdae loved his kids as her own only made him love her more. And right now, as Chenle has all the loves of his life around him- it only tears him down more. If only this was a much pleasant occasion instead of a horrifying one.

Meanwhile, in the courtroom similar feelings and emotions are being done. However, it's only directed at Renjun and his mum.

Renjun is an incoherent speechless dreadful mess as he’s plunged in tears. He wants to shout and cry out loud but he can't even express his overwhelming pain as his own physical state hurts him with every move he makes causing him so much discomfort. All he does is sink his head into his mother's shoulders and shudders as the tears furiously plunge out of his one good eye.

His mother with immense loving arms tightens her embrace- shielding him from the emotions of right now. Her scent sips into his nostrils and despite the ache, he appreciates this comfort which in all his life has always sought out for. The sincere and dear love of his mother. Her heart shreds due to how she failed to protect her son from the boy she gave birth to. Her eyes have sprinkles of water, and her head throbbing with the new forming headache from holding in a load amount of tears. From the moment she took in this lost little Chinese boy as her own son, for the first time in her dark miserable life she could say that she had hope. To see her hope of a son bearing his soul out for a crime he did not commit, stains her soul of feeling like a failure again. She failed with her first son. But right now, she didn’t want it to be the case of her second son. And so she holds in her voice of agony, of pain and whispers with strength. "You're going to be alright okay? I'm not mad at you. You did what was right and I swear it’ll all pay back some day. It looks dark now, but I promise you Renji that…everything will work out.” Her eyes let out some tears before she sniffs. “I promise that I’ll be waiting for you when you come out. Don't be scared my boy, be brave in there. Don’t let them break you. You are my hope and I know this world doesn’t deserve you, but come back to me in one piece okay? I love you so much Renji, so so much you have no idea. Just stay strong for me okay?"

“Okay,” Renjun hiccups out trying to hold it in but the devastation is too much to bear.

Standing in line behind Mark, Donghyuck watches vulnerably.

It pains and even hurts to see his mum in tears and wrapping all her love upon Renjun. Even when the guards break them apart and Renjun gets back in line behind him, he prepares himself for the hug that he knows his mum always gives. He's expecting for his mum's love and attention, even though she might be angry at him, Donghyuck knows that she always gave the best hugs of comfort.

But when she looks at him…

Donghyuck is only able to make out the look of humiliation. Disappointment. And so much sadness as though she’s failed with him. In her eyes that were so full of adoration and affection for Renjun, he gets her capital look of sadness as she covers her mouth and closes her eyes filled with tears and turns away.

Donghyuck sucks in a sharp breath, his glossy eyes stinging from how much tears he's holding back. He gets pushed out of the court room by the police and he follows them to a waiting room. Upon waiting they get taken in for their final prints. Still with cuffs around his wrists, he’s aggressively assisted in getting his finger prints inked and pressed on paper. He does his signature, gets a court mug shot and then initially given a see through plastic bag of a blue standard prison uniform. Mark gets the same color.

Yet, upon seeing Renjun walk out of the prints room with a bag of orange prison clothes… he can't hold in his tears. Renjun sits on the other side of the hallway but still in front of Donghyuck, when he sees that his older brother’s shoulders are sagged so low and he hears sounds of anguish, sounds of agony, does his heart remind him of how much he’s put up with Donghyuck. All he wanted was to be his brother’s friend and getting to know his brother. Unfortunately, trying to get to know his brother would mean becoming him and that’s not something Renjun ever wants again. And so, also silently he weeps again out of his one good eye.

Meanwhile Jeno and Mark have such emotionless looks towards one another. Unlike the other bags, Jeno’s see through bag had a green prison uniform. Mark is so distorted to reality and unfazed with his brother that when Jeno gets ushered out by a new guard he finds himself speaking. “Good luck bro,”

Jeno, in his own unfazed and worn-out actuality mummers. “You too.”

In honesty, for Jeno everything was one big blur. The fact that it was night and he was in the car with his brother, to somehow him waking up in a hospital 3 weeks later with minor burn patches just chaotically threw him off everything he knew as reality. And then he hears that he’s being charged with breaking and entering into a wealthy mansion. It’s the most absurd nightmare he’s ever woken up from- everything was one big drunken blur of memories popping up here and there, but he has no recollection of actually living in those memories. To say he was beyond confused was an understatement. He was just numb yet puzzled that all this happened. All he remembers is being drunk and waking up in a hospital bed weeks later.

The one thing he can remember lividly, was when he entered into the girl that he has admired, when he entered her room and saw his brother forcing her to mouth fuck his crotch- that felt like something he would never ever be able to forget. That is a spare moment that he can’t get out his head. So walking into a prison statement with the least amount of knowledge of why he’s being sentenced, Jeno sucks it up and follows.

Donghyuck can’t stop crying at this point. Even if his voice is low, Renjun and Mark can hear it. Although it’s awkward for Mark, for Renjun it’s a painful and pitiful reality that shit hits hard. Donghyuck’s eyes are shut, as painful reminders of how he not only disappointed his mother and brother, but he also proved Yezi’s words to be true. The words of her telling him how worthless he is. Because truly, he feels like a worthless, filthy, cheap, vain, unlucky, useless, pathetic, miserable and pain for his whole family.

Donghyuck is in tears and can't even say anything when they take Renjun away to his respective bus leading to the county jail center. Renjun can't even say anything when seeing Donghyuck's head hung so low as his shoulders shake and light sounds of grief in emotions are heard from him. In fact, in this moment where he looks at his brother…there’s a slight mounting anger of how he should’ve never tried so hard to get his approval in anything. Donghyuck never ever cared about him. And as he leaves the court and gets into his bus, a slowly fueling hatred grows in him.

It’s only left Donghyuck and Mark in the corridor as they wait for the arrival of their bus that would probably be filled with returning criminals going back to the same prison. At this point, Donghyuck knew the cycle all too well.

He knew that there would be new second time offenders, old gang cliques who committed hard crimes, gang members who’re coming in to deliver a message to one of their old boys in prison, crime offenders who somehow always get away with petty charges instead of life sentences and lastly the guys who had nowhere else to go but prison…and so committing a petty crime to be charged at least 5 years would satisfy their life- these were the people that Donghyuck knew were going to be with him. Donghyuck knew of the type of people he’d see again, and how ecstatic they’d be to see him. Prison life was his home. The only home that welcomed him with open arms every time, with ‘friends’, people who protected him, the officers who alarmingly treated him ‘well’ and the all-time shelter and food that was provided to him each and every day.

If anything, he should’ve been happy to be going back to a place of ‘rest’, but there’s a weight on his chest that’s anchoring him down, there’s a heavy burden on his shoulders that’s sinking him. The fact that it’s not a thought but it’s now his reality. He always joked that one of these days he’d come back as a rapist, but now the dawning weight of his reality sets him in such a dark hole. He has added onto his record something that once hurt his mother. He has added onto his record a pain that’s deep and unfathomable, something that would define him as an ‘experienced criminal’. Donghyuck shudders and blurts out another cry as he sinks his head in between his hands. His own mother couldn’t even stand to look at him. Donghyuck feels so shut out right now. Enraged at himself for being such a fuck up. He can’t believe that he crossed over to a side he’d never thought himself of crossing.

When he feels the harsh hand of the guard, he knows that this time as he’s going to prison it won’t be the usual years of rest, but instead a commencement time of guilt and punishment. He deserved punishment for all that he’s put his family through. For all that he’s put everyone that he has hurt through.

He sucks up his tears but keeps his head down with his jaws locked. Unlike getting in the bus and always going to the back and greeting the old timers who joyously call unto his name- he takes the front seat close to the window. Mark, not obliged to follow, feels in him that his partner in crime isn’t himself and so he takes a seat next to him after acknowledging some of the returning inmates. Mark seated beside Donghyuck feels uncomfortable but can only endure it. Donghyuck has his head against the window his head pining on him. It doesn't sit right with Mark and all he can do is lay his hand upon the ladders shoulder. He had no words because he didn’t understand why he was moping.

Donghyuck can't take his eyes off his mum as she stands outside waving her hand towards Renjun's bus. She's crying, holding onto some tissue papers and looking defeated. Donghyuck's eyes sting when he sees her crouching down still in tears.

She used to look at him like that. She'd cry for him like that. But now she can't even stand to look at him.

As the bus begins moving out the court parking, Donghyuck’s eyes unconsciously catches onto the news crews and reports all withering and surrounding the court as they try to get to the ‘Zhong’ family. His eyes don’t mean to, but they go to the girls who are rushed into such a high class, superior and posh maroon looking car.

It all started with a car, an envious yet spiteful car that seemed in hands reach and just for him. A car that was a whole Pandora’s box. If only Donghyuck could go back in time, to the time that stupid spoilt car carrying those fucking high social brats passed his own rusty faded red car, if only he could go back and peal his eyes off that car and to his brother who only wanted to go home. He would’ve never lusted over the car if he knew what he knew. He would turn to his brother and agree to just take him home- far away from the lives of the rich people. Far away from the life of chaos. And far away from the life he was living.

•

After a decent and mouth sovereign dinner in a luxurious five-star restaurant, Chenle and his family quietly went back to their respective rental guarded home whereby their new life would begin.

Sitting around the living room, Chenle explains that the insurance company that insured their house will finish in about a month's time. But he wanted to know whether or not they felt safe moving back into that neighborhood or wanted a new place.

It's basically nonnegotiable for them all as they all want a change of scenery. Ever since the incident, the Zhong family were the communities most talked about family for (not only) the outrageous verdicts that the boys got, but also for how 4 lowlifes managed to break into such a secured residential area and well-guarded home. Few of the neighboring families moved out immediately, while others were already preparing to move out, most enhanced their security, so it only made sense that the people in the area didn't feel safe and were contemplating on leaving or staying.

"Another thing we need to address," Chungdae starts, laying her hand on Chenle’s knee, sensing his hesitancy. "Yezi,"

"Yes?" Yezi nervously squeezes Dae’s hand having an idea of what the conversation would be about.

Chungdae silently sighs looking at Chenle before focusing her attention on her step daughter, who had sadly and traumatically become pregnant but had said nothing ever since the confirmation at the hospital. "It's been a month and some days since you've been pregnant-"

"I know." She counts the days every day. "Can we not talk about-"

"And every time we bring it up you try to turn it down. Chungdae has got some pills you can take now to neutralize the thing moving in your stomach. Tomorrow is Wednesday and we’re taking you to the hospital to get it removed." This time Chenle speaks, his voice not too welcoming as if he has an idea of what his 16-year-old daughter is thinking. "If you're thinking about keeping it you can forget it."

Yezi's head strikes up at her dad with wide saddened eyes. She sits on the edge of her seat with prompt and firm lips. But the thing that speaks most to Chenle is the look of fortitude, of resilience of some sort of willpower. "Dad-"

"Absolutely not.” Chenle springs back in distaste of high disgust. “Not in my house. You are not-”

“Dad you didn’t even give me a chance to speak-”

“Speak about what?” Chenle’s got his eyes bulging out of his socket. “This is not a discussion we’re having. You’re going to remove-”

“No!” Yezi suddenly cries back and gulps back holding in her tears.

“You can't tell me you've been seriously thinking of keeping that damned thing-"

"Dad-"

“Yezi that’s enough!” Chenle never yells, but when he does it catches everyone off guard. “Have you gone stupid?”

“Honey-”

“No have you gone mad? Retarded maybe? Yezi this is not up for discussion. You will not have that thing grow in you!”

“Why? It’s my-”

“Have you fucking gone retarded-”

“Dad this is my child!” It takes Chungdae holding Chenle back by his arm when he shoots up from the couch, while Dae holds tightly onto Yezi’s hand when Yezi bursts out in franticness. The tears now streaming out. “I’m not going to remove it. It’s mine.”

“Yezi,” Chenle and Chungdae both call out in a morphed sadness filled with disappointment.

"Yezi," Dae calls in bafflement. Ever since the accident, they hadn’t left each other’s side. They slept in the same hotel room, despite there being enough rooms. They had late night talks whereby they felt comforted in each other as sisters for the first time. Their bound had never ever been like this before, whereby they hardly spoke to each other yet felt distant in their experiences- but at the same time they wanted to protect each other, they wanted to love each other more than ever. But not even Dae could understand the sudden twist and burst of emotions from her little sister. In Dae’s mind when looking at her little sister- after all the talks they’ve had she would have never thought that an idea of even keeping the child was valid. "You want to keep it?" Dae asks quietly.

With the question hanging in the air and all ears attentive to Yezi, while their brains are in astonishment of the seemingly new revelation, Yezi presses her hands to her stomach and nods her head slowly. There's a long pause in the air causing Yezi's heart to beat rapidly and she's afraid to look up. She already knows what her dad will say, what Chungdae will say, what Dae will say, but she doesn't care. “I want to keep it, I need to keep it.”

There’s such a strong tensed silence that moves around the room. Chenle’s chest is mounting with such boiling anger when looking at his daughter.

“Why?” Chungdae asks in confusion, distress and fear especially when feeling her husband’s hand bulging. “Yezi-”

“No.” Chenle is seething through his teeth. The ‘no’ serves as a mind snapping effect for Yezi. She looks up to her dad with tears in her eyes, her jaw trembling.

“Dad.”

“No.” Chenle is firm when saying his final verdict. It doesn't matter that Yezi full of sadness attempts to speak- Chenle doesn’t want it. "No. You are not keeping it. No daughter of mine will-"

"But dad-"

"I said no Yezi." Chenle shakes his head again trying to calm himself down. "You're not keeping it. You're not keeping that bastard of a child. You are going to take the pills now and tomorrow-"

"Dad I'll never forgive myself for killing it-"

"Forgive yourself? You're not at fault here." Chungdae adds with confusion seeing that Yezi shakes her head and seems determined. "And it's not alive yet, you're not killing it. You're removing it."

"Mum please." Yezi sits on the edge of her seat looking desperate. “I can’t do it. I can’t go on with allowing this little thing in me to die. I don’t have the heart to go through with the abortion. I would never forgive myself-”

“For fuck- Yezi!” Chenle can’t believe what he’s hearing. From the corner of the room, the little Daegal is quivering and shivering by the uproar of Chenle’s voice. “No-”

“Dad you’re not carrying this so you don’t understand.” Yezi finds herself breaking free from Dae’s hand and standing up with her arms covering her womb. “You don’t understand how long it took me to get to this point. I’ve thought about it ever since I found out. I will keep the baby. Not because I am excited to have it, but because I don’t want to kill it. I cannot square it with my conscious. It's also a living being and has a right to life, and I shouldn't decide whether it gets to live or not. I don’t have that right and it’s heartless and inhumane even thinking about taking away-"

As Yezi hits nerve after nerve Chenle is so close – a pinch away from forcing his daughter to have no choice, the words that she’s saying only make his blood boil. Her words render Chungdae silent as her thoughts are suddenly on her past mistakes. Not only Chungdae, but Dae as well knows that whether it was intentional or not Yezi was hitting on and referring to the reason her parents split and that was because of Chungdae and her ‘babies’.

“Do you know what pain I’m feeling at just the thought of giving it up-”

Dae can feel the tension slowly rising in the room, and if Yezi didn’t choose her words correctly then most assuredly she would be in big trouble. “Yezi-”

But Yezi’s already so hot with her words and can’t back down as she speaks over Dae shaking her head. “I’ve read the damages that abortions can have on a woman’s body. Dad you should know far better than anyone what abortions can do-” Her jaws tremble glaring at her dad now with such overwhelming anger. “What if I’ll never get a chance like this again? Huh? You and Chungdae have been trying for a really long time but nix and zilch have been the results-”

Chungdae feeling jabbed shakes her head. “That’s not- Sweety please let’s not-”

“You can't even give birth anymore because of all those abortions you’ve had while having an affair with my dad behind my mum’s back. You both took the right away and now you want me to make that same fucked up decision as-”

She’s not expecting the rough hand of her dad gripping onto her wrist and dragging her with such force and strength. “Honey please-” Chungdae has to suck up her pride and wipe her eyes when trying to follow Chenle.

“Where are those pills?”

“Honey please let’s just sit and talk-”

“No.”

"No?" Chungdae follows rapidly behind Chenle who busts opens into different drawers around their room while Yezi yells for her dad to let her go. “Honey please, she’s crying and-”

“Where are the pills?!”

Chungdae is taken aback at Chenle shouting when directing his attention to her.

“This is my daughter! There’s no way in fucking hell will I ever allow her to even consider keeping that thing in her womb! It’s not hers and we’re not raising that thing!” Chenle’s jaw locks when his eyes take notice of the sullen look plastered over her features.

“That ‘thing’ was in my womb too, and I…” The look of guilt coats Chungdae’s face, dampening his mood when seeing how teary and weary eyed she gets. At this point it’s by instinct how he always tries to wipe the tears off her eyes before they fall off. Letting go of Yezi instantly just so he can attend to Chungdae only leaves Chungdae in a remorseful crying mess as she covers her face with shame. “If I hadn’t had all those abortions then maybe we would’ve been… I would’ve been able to give you the child you wanted-It’s all my fault, I’m sorry honey-”

“No, no.” Chenle’s voice simmers down into a low tenderly octave when hearing how broken and crushed his wife’s cry is. He walks carefully towards her, his hands holding onto her shoulders looking just as vulnerable. “It wasn’t your fault. Don’t do that baby, don’t,” Straightaway he wraps his arms around her securing her from the emotions that have resurfaced. “Baby… we made that decision t-together. It’s not your fault.. You didn’t…I don’t blame you at all my love. Please, don’t cry,”

“Yezi’s right-” Chungdae whimpers, not being able to stop the tears as well as remove her hands from her blotched crying face.

“She’s not right, don’t listen to her. She will not disrespect you like that and-”

Chungdae shakes her head, knowing exactly what Yezi meant. Chenle would never understand what it’s like to live with that conscious memory of having done an abortion, only for it to affect everything years later. He would never get it because he refused to come to terms with the fact that she took away the one thing he was really excited about, and that was to have kids with her.

The first few times when they found out she was pregnant was in their mutual decision to remove baby after baby in hopes of Chenle’s former wife not to find out, but after the cat got out the bag and Chenle came clean to his wife of his affair did Chungdae unintentionally decide to remove the baby thinking that this would’ve been the last time she’d see him ever again. Little did she know that it would’ve been the last time she’d ever be able to conceive again.

Her tears are all over the place, loud enough for Dae to even hear. Upon seeing Yezi frantically walk towards the door- Dae stops her. “That was a low blow Yezi. Did you really have to?”

“But it’s true.”

“Just because it’s true it doesn’t give you the right to just bring stuff like that up. You know Chungdae is sensitive to -”

“She’s sensitive because she fucked up-”

“You think you’re not being a fuck up right now?” Dae yanks Yezi by her arm when she opens up the main door. Forcing Yezi to look at her they both look at each other intensely. “Look, I probably don’t have much of a say in you and wanting to keep it but don’t drag mum down-”

“You keep forgetting she’s not my mum,” Yezi rips her arm away from Dae. “And plus. I already spoke to mum- our real mum. She said I can keep it.”

Dae has a puzzled almost annoyed face. “You’ve been talking to her? Yezi do you even know-”

“Just because she used dad, and you didn’t get along with her doesn’t mean she’s not my mum anymore. She’s still a mother to me, I love her more than I ever did you and dad, she’s still my mum and she gave me enough clarity to decide for myself.” Yezi doesn’t look hurt, but her eyes do look somber upon talking about her mother.

Dae can only try to breathe in as she finds the right words to say despite her anger slowly rising. “You’re forgetting that she’s the one who asked for that divorce not dad. She’s the one who left us for her new free life. She didn’t take us with her because she didn’t want us- so what could she possibly tell you about child birth that would make you consider even keeping that thing? The mother that I know would’ve never even allowed you to keep a rapist’s child.”

“You’re wrong, our mother- just like dad loved kids. And it’s not a rapist’s child, it’s my child.” And with that Yezi opens up the front door and bangs it. She has no real destination when leaving the house- all she knows is that she needed to clear her head. It’s past 10pm and she doesn’t even-

“Going somewhere?”

She stops, being startled for a second. Standing by a black vehicle, she spots the Officer Na Jaemin. “Officer Na,” Her gaze being fazed by his presence. “What’re you doing here?”

Jaemin simply stares at the girl. “Patrol work. Your father wanted tight security while being here in the rental house.”

“Tight security by yourself?”

Jaemin shifts his weight a little displaying the black tinted window of the car. He knocks twice on it, causing the window to roll down displaying a shy smiling Officer Jisung. “Yes?”

“Jisung and I are here, there’s two at the back, two on each side, and two at the gates. We’re tight if the time calls for it.” Jaemin points out. “Once again, are you going somewhere? If so we’ll escort you.”

Yezi shakes her head. “No, it’s fine.” Being pissed by the sudden securing of protection she walks back the path to the house but stops midway with a nonstop chaotic mind and walks back towards the Officers. Jisung’s window is rolled back up while Jaemin has his head down within his padded jacket. He blends in so well with the car being black and everything he has on being black- including his hair.

“Officer,”

He peeks up again, and Yezi can see that under his eyes there’s faint marks. He looks tired. “What.” He doesn’t seem the least bit interested in what she has to say, all that he wants to do is sleep.

Yezi however pants in and out looking like a fish caught in water. “I… I want to keep it. I want to keep the baby that’s growing in me.” Yezi’s eyes water. “But I don’t want anyone to hate me for it.”

Jaemin can stare as his ears adjust to the words coming out of her mouth. “You… Did you just say you want to keep it?” How old is she? It’s probably the reason she’s even outside, maybe she wanted a clear head to think better. And if so, Jaemin had to stop her because he was the wrong person for this type of conversation. “Should I call your dad?”

“No-” Yezi shakes her head before hanging it down with trembling lips.

“Look, I’m only 23. I’m a male. And I’m not a part of your family, so you can’t just tell me all these things,” He’s 23, a male and an officer with no family as he was an orphaned boy. There’s nothing that he could say that would be of any assistance to this girl who’s 16…7 years younger than him. However, when she doesn’t move and her shoulders shudder, he grows uncomfortable in his padded jacket and inwardly cusses. He was always the worst when it came to giving some sort of relief. He turns his head to the car just in time seeing Jisung look away.

After a long silence, it takes Yezi blurting out a little cry does Jaemin breathe out his nose and licks his lips looking at her. Yezi tries to contain herself by remaining silent and sniffs back her tears (which made Jaemin feel tight in place) while wiping the back of her sleeve over her eyes. She doesn’t look up, but her body turns around and she begins walking away. It only takes a few steps before Jaemin’s voice comes out. “I can listen.” He speaks out. “If you want to… talk,”

If she came outside, it’s because she most likely had an argument with her family. And the last place she probably wants to go is inside.

That makes her stop in her tracks, and ever so slowly she peers up into Jaemin’s eyes. He looks nervous and almost worried. Nervous to the point that he even stands straighter and gets his hands out his padded jacket. “I don’t think I’ll be of any use,” He shrugs his shoulders scratching the back of his head. “But, I can listen,”

Yezi turns her body around in a slow manner, her eyes are slightly teary but upon gazing into his sincere eyes does she fully turn her body around to face him.

“So,” Jaemin clears his throat uneasily. “You want… to keep it?”

“Yeah,” Her voice is low and shaky. “Because for the first time after the accident, I saw a glimpse of light.” Her hands pressing onto each other as she slowly inhales and exhales looking up slightly to the stars that are a few in the night heavenly sky. “We were in the hospital with my mum and dad, and they did an ultrasound.” A gloomy look gets on her crestfallen face, but Jaemin’s eyes are on the watery glaze that coat her eyes making them crystal clear as if they’re twinkling. “On that screen I saw… this tiny little pea. That little pea in me was so small… and this was the darkest time in my life, but looking at that little dot on the screen I felt…hope. Strangely. I felt something come alive in me again. Like a light in a dark tunnel. And I remembered thinking that, I couldn’t protect myself, you know.” She sniffs and her hands gently cup her abdomen. “I fought and I really tried to stop him from, you know. I fought so hard and I tried. I tried but… there was nothing I could do. So looking at the screen, seeing that there was something moving in me, that this tiny ball was moving around as if it already had life… I knew that even if I couldn’t protect myself, I could protect that baby, because it’s my baby. It’s coming from inside of me, this little pea will somehow become something, will somehow bare it’s own life.”

Jaemin blinks slowly no expression on his face except an honest concern for the girl. “You want to keep the very thing that’s come from something so painful?”

“I don’t even like kids that much, but I don’t want to remove this baby in me. This doesn’t feel like the trauma of rape…but this is me protecting this baby,”

“Protecting it from what?” Jaemin whispers. “What’s your reason for keeping it?”

“It’s the fact that it’s a life-”

“It’s not a life,” Jaemin lowly inputs making Yezi shake her head.

“It’s in me Officer Na, I can feel that there’s something in me.” She breaths out. “Because it’s a product from something so painful… doesn’t give me any right to take away something as precious as life from it, that’s not even born. I… Do I really need a reason in order for me to keep it? Why do I need a reason that will be good enough for anyone to listen? This…” Yezi’s eyes flattering with tears make Jaemin alert in getting his back off the car and stepping forward to the girl. “What would make me any different from a person sitting in a prison cell because they murdered another person? Murdered another human being?”

“That doesn’t count,”

“The only difference is that taking an unborn baby’s life away is somehow legal. That’s not fair. Officer Suh didn’t deserve to be killed like that, but because he was gunned down by someone who intentionally wanted to kill him made that person a murderer. And I would be one too if I took away this baby’s life intentionally- other people can get rid of it if they want, but why is it wrong for me to want to keep it?”

“Hey,” Jaemin’s hesitant and alert when the tears won’t stop falling from her eyes. He carefully lays his hand on her shoulder and clears his throat. “Hey, don’t cry about it.”

“I just wanted some air, I just wanted a break. I don’t want my dad to take this little baby away from me,” Her tears don’t stop pouring out, resulting in Jaemin hesitantly stepping forward and wrapping his arms around the girl. He sighs quietly when she takes another step forward and wraps her arms around his torso crying out.

“It’s okay, just cry it out,” Jaemin finds himself soothing and consoling her. “Hopefully everything will be okay,” He mummers out.

But 3 months later…prior to what Jaemin said, everything was not okay. In fact, things kept falling apart.

Yezi lingers by the doorway of the house hearing the commotion erupting from inside the house, mostly likely Dae’s room. Chungdae who’s standing next to Yezi closes the door and sighs. They just came from another ultrasound from a private hospital and just after receiving good news from the doctor and a lovely sonogram picture of her beautiful looking baby, she walks into the chaos of her family. She thought that after the first month her family would be ‘normal’ again. But from her dad purposely ignoring her presence because of wanting to keep the baby, to Chungdae often being left in the middle of choosing her husband and step kid, to Chenle getting intense stress not only at work and with building the new house (which would be far away) but also from Dae’s excessively new lifestyle- Yezi can only see her family going down a spiraling hill of dismay.

The only thing that’s been uplifting or of any sort of good news, is the media outlets dying down and Yezi being able to continue her homeschooling with Doyoung without getting bombarded by some news crew. Another good thing that Yezi kept looking forward to is surprisingly her new ‘friendship’ with the Officer Na Jaemin. At this point, with her sister turning into somebody else, and Chungdae becoming more motherly towards her, the only person she would truly and freely chat to about everything falling apart and a way to clear her mind was Jaemin. For the most parts he only listened and barely looked like her cared, but Yezi knew better because he’d always be ready to listen to her, and Yezi found it caring that aside from getting Boba coffees for himself and Jisung, he’d also get for her as well (and sneak in some of her pregnancy cravings that Chungdae wouldn’t approve of).

But right now, it’s 5pm in the afternoon and already she can hear the back and forth arguments from her dad and Dae.

Lately, it’s become a habit of her dad and older sister fighting back and forth. Dae found refuge in going clubbing with her friends, getting wasted, getting drunk and coming back home dumb out of her mind, out of her senses. Dae, under the overwhelming pressure of everything; from dropping out of college and getting paid lessons online, to being forced to work with her dad, to getting intense nightmares about being sexually assaulted that night by Mark, to getting pressured from her friends to let loose and party with them- to Dae ultimately deciding that her life is nothing but one big joke.

Slowly, right before their eyes, Dae was becoming an addict to a lifestyle that was highly frowned upon in their family. The once head strong girl of the family was crumbling and numbing her senses to intoxicating alcohol….and worst of all drugs.

“For hell’s sake you’re not leaving the house dressed like a whore!”

“Don’t touch my stuff-”

“Dae- What’s this?”

“Dad I said don’t touch my stuff-”

“Where the hell did you get this?” Yezi slowly walks in the house watching Chungdae disappear behind some walls, probably going to try and calm down the situation. But from the sounds of it, Yezi can hear how her dad is slowly losing his temper.

“Give it back!” Dae yells and a few seconds later she hears Chungdae.

“Dae, what the hell is going on through your head? How could you-”

Yezi jumps a little when hearing a door slammed shut. Next thing a fazed and alert looking Dae stomps into the hallway with the most daring of outfits in the shortest black dress that hardly covers her exposed rare and yet has a spilt on both sides, paired together with fishnet stockings and clicking heels. Upon seeing Yezi, Dae’s enraged face that’s coated in hardcore makeup freezes into one of shame. Her eyes wither and she lightly puts down her skirt while a nervous smile coats her face as she walks to Yezi. “H-hey? You’re back,”

Yezi only has a sad smile on her face hugging her sister and smelling yet again the most nauseating smells of alcohol. “Hey,” She pips. “Are you going ou-”

“Oh what’s this.” Dae completely cuts off taking the picture out of Yezi’s hand and looking at the ultrasound. “Wow. It’s so big now.” Yezi’s eyes water a little while looking at her sister. Her hair which is curly to the extreme makes her look like a mess, her eyes are wide with joy but Yezi knows that her sister’s struggling and to make it worse she’s been losing weight like crazy. “Do they know it’s gender yet?”

Before Yezi can respond she hears heavy footsteps trudging down the stairs and Dae’s anger peeking out of her eyes before she stiffly mummers. “We’ll talk later.” Was a common phrase that she’d say regularly but she never held up to her word and they’d hardly talk.

And just like that Dae stomps away in her high heels, yanks the front door open and slams it just as Chenle in fury steps into the living room with several packets of white substances and needles. He pants and curses before going to the door and pulling it back and storming out.

“Cocaine,”

Yezi looks back when hearing Chungdae leaning by the hallway entrance.

“It was cocaine.”

And because this situation has become far too normal in their house, Yezi moves over to her mum and lays down the wall next to her and comforts her crying frame.

“What are we doing wrong?” Chungdae asks while sniffing in. “Our Dae,”

And so the days go by, with Chungdae and Yezi growing their bond through their mutual love and interest for the coming baby. Going to the hospital together, seeing the ultrasound in high-frequency and hearing sound waves of the baby’s heartbeat create in Yezi a desire to keep pushing despite the pain she feels in her heart of her family falling apart. Chenle in the house becomes scarce, just as much as Dae. While Dae publicly drinks and drowns away her life, Chenle shuts himself in private bars drinking during the night and working during the day. The house felt so lonely, and reminds Yezi of the first few days of how it was like when their mum left them. The house was void without a motherly touch until Chungdae came around. And up till now, Yezi without a doubt aspires to be the light that Chungdae is, smiling despite the pain and remaining strong for everyone.

Chungdae comforts Chenle whenever he lays in bed with her, she comforts Yezi in all times whenever Yezi calls, and she tries so desperately to be there for Dae- who has completely shut down. It’s hard to believe that Dae is her sister, she’s become unrecognizable in the family. It doesn’t help that slowly she started looking like a stranger, skinny form from all the intake of cocaine and alcohol, shaved eyebrows, dyed bleach blonde hair, cutting her hair so short, piercings and a slow growing tattoo kink all over her legs.

6 months later, still with their new house being built and them still living in the rental house Yezi thought their situation would’ve calmed down. However, it just got worse. One too many times she’s spotted Hendery leaving their house while scrambling to put on his clothes after having a steamy night and disrupting everyone from sleeping. She’d only do this whenever dad was not in the house- and if ever dad was in the house and he heard such, he’d be on full defense mode and barge into Dae’s room with repulsion. Of course this would erupt another fight from them with Dae leaving with Winwin, sometimes Yang Yang, but a lot of the times Hendery would be guilty at the scene- soon becoming Chenle’s worst human beings.

“And she keeps sleeping with them in the house. I feel bad that I can’t do anything to even help her out,” Yezi mutters while eating on a secret pack of chocolate balls that Jaemin bought. Jaemin, leaning against the car while watching Yezi (who is seated on the hood of his car) and dipping his fingers in the pack of chocolate balls while listening to her.

“Do you still speak to her?”

“It’s hard to,” Yezi responds. “She’s barely in the house, and when she’s in the house she’s occupied with some boy locked up in the room- but it’s only for a moment before mum or dad barge in and she storms out,”

“Damn,” Jaemin mutters. “Your parents must be the most stressed people in that house right now.” Jaemin acknowledges.

Despite not being on duty of being on night patrol, he’d always come for his weekly chats with Yezi. In some way, he ordained himself as her therapist. Maybe it’s because he wanted to simply be of help to the girl, but in some distorted way…he enjoyed having a ‘friend’ in Yezi. It was odd calling their late night talks as some sort of stress relieve, but Jaemin felt that there was no other way to describe his new found friendship with her. He didn’t have any friends aside from Jisung, but yet when it came to Yezi he found it easy to be around her and just not try to force anything. All he had to do was listen, and she’d do the rest. It became interesting when she’d do the same for him and allow herself to listen to all he had to say.

“Speaking of which, any progress with your dad?” Jaemin asks.

“It’s been months since I last spoke to him. It feels even awkward being in the same space as him. Even if there is an issue between us, I still believe that as a healthy parent he’ll discuss the problem openly with me. Silence is not a solution, but it somehow sums up my relationship with him now.” Yezi mutters and shrugs her shoulders. “He doesn’t even look at me,”

“I’m sorry about that,” Jaemin says sincerely.

“Mum says I should just give him time, that he’ll come around. But I doubt it. Whereby I would talk to him day and night, all we do now is say good morning and good night, at times we go a full day without even greeting each other.” Yezi sighs and puts her hand on her stomach, which was a healthy looking bump after 6 months. “I’m just afraid that the day I give birth to my child, my dad will- oh my god.” Yezi’s eyes grow in brightness her hand quickly pressing and feeling onto her stomach. “Officer Na-”

Jaemin is alarmed and panicked by the smile on her face. “What happened? What’s wrong?”

“Feel it,” Yezi’s mouth is left agape as the wondrous joy surrounds her. Jaemin doesn’t even need to put his hand on her belly to know that it’s kicking. The way her stomach flamboyantly moves creates a smile to grow on his face. “Feel it,” Yezi urges as her mouth grows wider in joy. “Oh my god, look,”

Jaemin is hesitant when lifting his hand since he sees that even the layer of the shirt is moving up and down from the bumps on her stomach. She’s not even focused on him, but Jaemin’s smile is radiant when seeing how happy she is. The only times he’s seen her happy was whenever they’d talk about the baby- and seeing how her face lights up makes him drawn to her smile.

“Look, look, look,” She presses her shirt down so that her bump is revealed more and so that Jaemin can see how flamboyantly the belly bulges are- the baby kicking or punching and being free with the belly of it’s soon to be mother.

“Wow,” Jaemin chuckles. “That’s a boy right?”

“I don’t know yet,” Yezi smiles and looks up to Jaemin. “Feel it,”

Jaemin lifts his hand up to her stomach and wonders where he should put it on, but then Yezi points to a spot and Jaemin gently lays his hand down. He doesn’t press or remove his hand when in a flash where his hand is that’s where he feels several bulges popping out- beating him. “My fucking soul- Doesn’t that hurt?” Jaemin is startled in shock but laughs nervously when Yezi starts laughing.

Chenle, from his room on the second floor carefully looks out the window when hearing his child laugh. He felt the most pain in him for neglecting his children. Lately, he’s fallen on his path of drinking more wine than he should. He couldn’t help it. He had two daughters who were out of his reach now, and there was nothing he could do to bring them back to him. And just like now, he can only stand and watch from afar how one laughs, while the other is nowhere to be seen but is for sure having a good time.

“Hey,” Chenle doesn’t shift his eyes off of Yezi’s smile. Even when Chungdae wraps her arms around his waist and lays her head on his shoulder. “You know it’s not too late to reconcile with her,”

Chenle sighs and closes his eyes and leans on the window frame as he lifts his arm around Chungdae’s shoulders. “I don’t think she’d want to reconcile with me,”

“What are you talking about honey, you know she’d love to talk to you,” Chungdae whispers while looking up to Chenle. “It’s all she ever talks about. About if you’ll ever forgive her,”

Despite Chenle respecting Yezi’s decision by not interfering in a forceful manner, he believed that silence between them is the only way.

“You know if she was somehow pregnant with someone she knows and wanted to keep the child at this age, I wouldn’t be as hard, but this… It’s an omen. A bastard’s child.” Chenle whispers only for Chungdae to lay her head on his shoulder.

“I know, but a child isn’t an omen,”

Chenle shakes its’ head. “Forget what the media is saying, that bastard child will grow up and will look just like the person who raped her. How do you think the child will feel knowing it’s a product of rape?”

“How do you think the child will feel in a house that’s unwelcoming?”

“It doesn’t belong here,” Chenle whispers. “It’s difficult to wrap my head around her wanting to give birth to that damned child.” He mutters and opens his eyes looking outside again. When he hears another loud laugh from her and the Officer Na rapidly removing his hands and flapping them, a meek smile grows on Chenle’s lips as he whispers. “When she was still in the womb, she’d kick like crazy. It terrified the shit out of me,”

“She needs you the most right now honey,” Chungdae whispers back before turning her gaze outside.

“And I need my daughter back too, but it’s clear she’s not coming back,” Chenle mummers. “That girl right there is going to be a mother to a bastard child, and I don’t think I want to be a part of that life.”

And so it is. The 9th month mark hitting on the calendar alerting Yezi to being ready for any day that her surprise child would come out. She’s saddened that both her dad and Dae are nowhere near her during those days. The new year passes and days progress with Yezi, barely being able to walk with her stomach on full display of the big pregnancy she has. While being small- despite the little weight she gained, she still looked so young and to think she’d bring in life to the world encouraged her to carry on.

February comes along with Yezi getting nervous that she’s not going into labor even when the month is close to ending. Already being worried and terrified, even when sitting on top of Jaemin’s car and expressing her worry- she’s not expectant at all when feeling wet and water dripping from her uterus. “Jaemin?” She nervously calls while having her eyes wide open.

“What? What’s wrong? Yezi, calm down,” Jaemin doesn’t know what’s going on when her face is drained of blood, but when she struggles to get off the car and holds unto the bottom of her stomach- looking shitless scared Jaemin takes a wild guess to know; “Don’t tell me it’s time now? Is it time?”

Yezi can’t speak or produce coherent words when she squeezes her legs together and bends trying to hold under her belly trying to maintain the weight that feels like it’s going to fall out. “Mum! Jaemin call mum! Mum! Oh mu god! Oh my god! Mum it’s coming out!” She implores when the pain kicks in her stomach.

With Chenle not being in the house and Chungdae not knowing how to drive, is panicked when hearing Yezi crying out for her life. Jaemin thankfully is alert and eager to assist when taking both Chungdae and Yezi in his car driving them. Yezi is on the verge- panting and moaning in pain in sweats and looks like any time soon she’ll faint. Chungdae is panicked and in heats of trying to calm down while also telling Yezi to breath and relax. Thankfully even despite the roads being hectic, Jaemin uses his siren and police advantage to cut the stop signs and traffic lights trying to get as fast as he can to any hospital nearby as the one they retained to was too far. It’s close, with Yezi almost collapsing in the backseat does Jaemin eventually get to a hospital carrying Yezi and lunging to the doors.

Triumphantly, the nurses don’t give them any problems and instantly assist when seeing the blood staining her pants and Yezi crying out for her dear life. Chungdae is inside the hospital room with Yezi, while Jaemin is outside reminiscing on such an experience. He’s never felt as heavy weighted as he did and hearing as well as seeing Yezi succumb to pain terrified him.

Jaemin is awakened by a jolly nurse who comes out with all smiles. “It’s a girl.”

Yezi, at 1 a.m. on a Sunday morning of late February, almost having driven herself to the brink of death when assertively pushing out of her tiny body- weighing 5 pounds and 8 ounces (2,500 grams) a beautiful miniature and petite baby girl.

Yezi is in heaps of sweat, her legs shaking in pain and uterus throbbing yet a gleeful and prideful smile lights up her entire face even when she cries after holding onto the little baby girl in her arms. She can’t stop crying for the reasons of both joy and sadness. The little, healthy, bundle of radiance in the baby girl shines so bright and takes away her family not being present. Yezi can’t believe her eyes. A tiny little thing with eyes pressed close and body rigid yet having it’s arms out and gripping onto her hair only overwhelms her, and the joy spreading all over her makes her cry blissfully.

“My baby.” Yezi whispers upon kissing the top of the fragile little head of the baby girl. “Oh my god she’s so tiny. I’m gonna protect you okay, mummy’s gonna protect you and you’re safe now okay? My beautiful baby girl, my baby,” Yezi cries holding tightly onto the baby- and even in return as the nurses gently try to take her away to clean her up- do her tiny little fingers grip onto Yezi’s hair crying when they try to pull her away. The scene is surreal and makes Yezi cry even more.

No amount of happiness that Yezi has ever felt in her life can ever top this moment of paradise and bliss.

“Everything went well,” Chungdae smiles with tears running down her face, while watching the nurses take care of the baby and the doctors closing Yezi’s uterus. “It’s a baby girl,”

Chenle despite not being present still feels in his heart pain for the departure of his daughter upon the new arrival of her daughter. “I’m happy they weren’t any complications,” But despite it all, he still smiles when Chungdae speaks so highly and positive of the baby.

While Chungdae chats with Chenle in a peaceful manner she laughs when watching the nurses change and hand the baby to Jaemin who’s panicked at how Yezi passes out with a smile on her face.

Meanwhile, downtown (2 a.m.) in a local club that’s drowning its customers with music, Dae grinds her body friskily all over Hendery’s toned body blurring out the world around her. The music is loud, the music is bold with slurs and ideologies scowled upon, but that doesn’t stop the others or Dae or Hendery from drunkenly dancing and dry humping on each other singing and cursing along to the songs. It’s when she heavily starts making out with Hendery does she heavily feel the weight and strong sense of someone staring at her- even as she’s drunk she can’t shake that feeling off. Ever since she walked in partly sober, all the way till she heavily inducted herself in the drinks and stashed drugs Hendery had- did she feel as though she was being watched.

Not paying mind to it, her and Hendery take it over to the co-ed bathroom having a rash and messy quickie with both of them barely conscious of their actions. Dae is sloppy when sucking off Hendery and Hendery is lacking when it comes to thrusting with power- but they’re both so high that they barely care and yet still cum to the thoughts of sexual pleasure and having a good time. They’re drunk and high out of their mind when returning back to the dance floor to have another go at wasting their lives away.

Jeno, being sober and cleaning on the counter after the spilt drinks of the dozens of intoxicated bodies, finds it hard to believe that the girl he’s looking at is the same girl he had a crush on. As time goes by, his eyes are only hooked to her in uneasiness and at times even revulsion as she’s not in her right senses and doing things that he’d never thought she’d do. From grinding with one too many men, to making out with anyone that puts their lips on her, to some point even groping and gripping on her like a ragdoll- Jeno can only watch in shock that this lady with short bleached out blonde hair, bright red bra and tight exotically short red leather skirt, dancing her life away is supposedly the same person that he saw in court 1 year ago.

Back then she had a strong persona, charismatic eyes, bountiful personality and good physics coated in her rich glory. The lady he knew had strangers looking at her all the time because of her rich lavish life, as well as good healthy appearance as people wanted to be her, as well as wanted to be friends with her. The same lady he knew made him see rich people in a different light, a light of being beautiful yet so self-absorbed and selfish. However, upon looking at the dance floor at 3 am, seeing a skinny deranged lady dancing like a drug addict commoner makes him worriedly curious about what happened.

There’s no way this was that same girl, there’s no way this unhealthy looking skimpy dancer is Dae. There’s just no way.

He was just in prison for 12 months, yet upon coming out and managing to get a job as a cleaner in a bar- he’s shocked out of his mind at how much a year can change a person. He only started working some days ago, but the moment his eyes landed on Dae and he began seeing her every single night at the club.

And for 2 weeks of Dae not being in the house, and Yezi being discharged and being the happiest she can be when being around her child, no one can take away her joy- not Dae’s messy life, not her father’s absence and lack of response to her- nothing can take the smile off her face. Even when her own baby cries.

“Areum you’ve got the most gorgeous smile, I have ever seen in my entire life, so tell me why, why are you crying so much? Is it because you don’t like your nappy being changed?” Yezi playfully plays with her child while changing the pampers and applying the medicine on her baby’s umbilical cord. Despite the baby girl, Areum crying, Yezi still coo’s cutely and playfully plays with her child while hurriedly changing her and giving her new pampers.

Chenle, who can’t stand the wails, goes into his room where Chungdae is ironing the baby’s clothes. “The baby’s crying.” He proclaims in irritation.

“Be a grandfather and help your daughter,” Chungdae sneakily answers with a mischievous smile. “Come on honey, there’s a first time for everything.”

Chenle despondently rolls his eyes and walks out the room going to the living room continuing to watch the news informatics while he works. He puts the volume louder blocking out the sounds of the whining crying child. In the room, Chungdae can only chuckle as she finishes ironing and walks back to Yezi’s room and coo’s. “Oh oh oh oh oh, why is my Areum crying? Why is my beauty beauty little girl crying huh? Does she want to be warm? Does she want to be warm?”

Truly speaking, this child, Areum brought a wide smile to her face. There’s a first time for everything, and helping Yezi look after her child felt like such a huge privilege for her. She never had this opportunity of caressing and even holding onto a baby- but yet Yezi gave her that integrity and honor of being there as a mother to her child. Chungdae more than anything loved the idea of having children, but when she found out that she was unable to, it crushed her. But now, being a premature grandmother gave her a glimpse into the life of what it’s like having a child. And she so badly wanted to have this experience with Chenle. Which is why when Yezi nervously questions, “Is he mad?”

Her answer is always. “Leave him, he’ll come around sooner or later. He can’t be too angry at our little Areum, hm,” Chungdae brushes her face on the little baby’s belly causing the dressed baby girl to squirm in delight and joy. “Look at that smile, look at that smile, my baby, my little Areum,”

Chenle shakes his head when for a spilt second the silence that consumes the living room from the pause break on tv, Chenle hears both the ladies dumbing down their intellect to speak in foreign baby voices and act cute.

Having the full support of her mother, Yezi is at peace when living her life around the house. Not only does she feel the weight and responsibility of being a mother, but she gracefully embodies and embraces a whole set of accountabilities. When waking up next to her baby, she’s always reminded of how she so badly wants to change her life and make sure that she’s a good, fit, role model and mother for her child. It pushes her to study to the best of her ability. She wasn’t born with a smart brain, but she has been applying herself and trying. And in the same way the nurses cared for her during her whole stay at the hospital, she also wanted to be a nurse who’d help people.

It seemed laughable at first, but when talking with Doyoung (her tutor) and he encouraged her to pursue her growing passion- her life seemed to be heading in a tremendously great path. Every day her face glowed brighter because of her Areum who would always look at her with the most caring of smiles. Her smile reminded her so much of Dae. Although it was annoying at times to see a smile on Dae’s fac, Yezi can now see how much a smile (a genuine) smile costs. Seeing Areum smile, is equivalent to seeing Dae smile. But despite missing her big sister, seeing her little baby girl always made Yezi remember how she wanted to protect her child from any bad omen projecting in this world.

And that means not even letting her drunk and high older sister near her child.

“Why won’t you let me see her?” Dae asks. With big gleaming and jittery eyes, as well as bad breath and coughing consistently, tragedy is all over her, and she’s shaky and has a nervous stance while scratching on her arm- this always alarms Yezi. Her sister was no longer the same. The mere fact that she looks like she’s on drugs doesn’t even sit well with Yezi or even convince her to allow her sister to be anywhere near her child.

Dae, for the worst, turned into the lifestyle that she hated, she smokes weed, sniffs on cocaine, injects heroin in her system on most days, drinks on heavy substances and looks like a completely different person especially with her no eyebrows and that god awful ugly bleached blonde and damaged short hairstyle. This wasn’t her loving sister anymore- this was a corpse living in her sister’s body. And there’s no way she’d allow for a skeleton with no soul to see her baby.

“She’s sleeping and I don’t want to wake her up,” Creating excuses and avoiding her sister has become such a huge burden for Yezi. All she wanted was for her sister to come back, but in this state of drowsiness and confusion only scares her that her sister will never get back.

Everything about her moved differently, her brain started working inversely, even her words weren’t giving life but breaking down and slowing down her speech, her posture was altered, her eye contact was unalike and her lips were always dry, even when she’d lick them they’d always turn white and cracked rapidly. It’s like her sister was morphing into something else, and sadly it wasn’t even a transitional phase, it was a reality that Dae couldn’t escape and Yezi’s heart was in pain seeing her sister like this, every day, without even knowing what she could do.

“Stop lying!” Dae yells and alarms Yezi. “You’re ashamed of me and don’t want me near your fucking child! Who cares anyway, she’s nothing but a pathetic resemblance of the fucker who raped you! You bitch. You dumb fuck always refusing me to see that fucker-” Yezi holds her ground when watching her sister break down all types of slurs. She turns around when hearing her baby crying in the room and ignores Dae shutting the door in her face just as Dae barks louder and emits all types of curses. “She’s also a huge fuck. She’s gonna rob houses, take advantage of people, she’s gonna hate- just like I hate you-”

“Dae? No, stop it.” Chenle holds onto Dae, but Dae thrusts her arms off her father and pushes him back.

“Everyone in this house should just fucking die already! You’re all looking at me like I’m a mess? No, I’m not- you all are!” Dae chuckles, but it’s so sad for Chenle to witness it all happen right before his eyes. “So what if I’m a mess- you all are fucking caged to this fucked up life! Fuck you all!”

Dae shuts her room door still slurring out. Chenle shakes his head, and turns to Yezi’s door. He carefully knocks on it and moments later, Yezi opens it up cautiously, but when seeing her dad she opens the door a little bit wider. “Are you okay?”

Yezi nods her head gulping down a little lump. Chenle nods his head looking in the room towards the bed where the child was, and after looking at her for a bit he nods his head again and walks off.

Not a minute later, Dae opens up her room door and throws middle fingers to both Chenle and Yezi. “Fuck you guys.” Before running out the house in the shortest black mini skirt and nothing on but a leopard bra.

However, Dae, much to her own disliking, feels as though she’s hit rock bottom and is far from any sort of compassion and saving. She’s empty when falling into a darker pit of shame and misfortune night by night. And being out of the house every night only to travel into self-destruction seemed like her only remedy.

With no arms at savings rich, and no family to care for her, Dae cries alone while consuming the drugs and dances every night alone or either with friends, but mostly alone hoping that she’ll just die. Even though the pattern continues every day, the will to die grows the strongest in her.

Her prayer is answered when one night she gets to the club and begins dancing her life away before getting into a petty fight with Hendery (on who gets the bill), to storming out the club in a wobbly unsteady dizzy mess only to be hit with her whole lanky body flying up and knocked off her feet straight into the pavement ground with such crude force, rendering her knocked out and unconscious, almost like death.

They always say that the few seconds of death, you’ll get a 7 second flashback of your entire life flashing before your eyes. Dae is convinced its death because within the seconds of her death she sees a face… a face of a memory she tried so hard to forget by taking in deadly drugs. Gauging down her throat his heavy loaded dick, Mark made Dae feel numb to everything that night, even while she heard her sister crying and yelling when Donghyuck was raping her, Dae can remember Mark cumming in her mouth and she felt so worthless and like a failure for her whole family-

Despite her mind in pure intoxication and dejection, Jeno from the club rushes out to the scene when seeing the car drive away after it swept Dae and knocked her off her feet and brutally against the floor. Jeno as he’s running to Dae on the floor, gets a flash memory of how he recalled seeing her the same way in her room. Despite being a rich girl, she seems to be caught in these situations of being lost and broken.

Instantly he cradles her up and looks left and right to see who can help, but there’s no one in sight or on the street or sidewalk- just the club full of ignorant dancing fools who ignore her and him outside. She’s breathing slowly, her face covered in blood pouring from her head, her eyes shut and body trembling rigidly. He pats her cheek lightly. “Dae? Dae? Come on, come on,” He begs before cursing when feeling her bleeding from her sides and he gets up on his feet with her weak body. He puts her on his back and makes sure her hands are around his neck while his arms are over her legs as he begins running as fast as he can.

Dae doesn’t even hear a thing when feeling the wind blow past her face- looking into Jeno’s side, her vision is blurry and all she can see is death. She hiccups but to Jeno that’s assurance that she’s alive and not dying.

“Stay with me Dae, just a little bit longer.”

Chenle can’t explain the discontent he’s been feeling with his new reality of life. In a normal life, he’s with his wife and two daughters who go to school, come home, talk about their future, ask him to buy things for them, eat all that they can eat, talk to him and ask for advice or even life lessons. In his dream he’s even gone as far to marrying them off to good men who have wealthy families and he knows that their generation will be able to sustain his wealth and inheritance. He even used to envision his grandchildren and how they’d be and how happy he’d be when dying of old age surrounded by his perfect family.

Yet in some distorted way, Chenle wakes up every day to his real reality being everything he loathes. Falling behind on work, being slow to building their new home because his mind is constantly wrapped around his daughters and all the chaotic decisions they’ve been making.

First it was Yezi and her bastard child, now it’s Dae and her spiraling life going into flames. Truly as a parent, he tried everything that he could to at least even get her to talk to him. Because that was always the first step into redemption; talking. But talking to Dae was impossible. His daughter had shut down in the worst way possible, and he didn’t know what to do.

The longest that Dae has stayed away from home was 4 days, but with a turn of events the longest that she’s stayed away from home is 2 weeks.

“Where could she be?” Chenle grows particularly concerned and troubled. He tries calling, texting but to his disappointment she doesn’t answer her phone or text back, it hardly gets to ‘seen’ and all calls go to voicemail. Chungdae tries calling, Yezi tries calling and emailing but still no answer. They call on her friends, especially Yang Yang, Winwin and Hendery who last claim that the last time they saw her she was in the club.

Before Chenle could take it a step further into filing and reporting her as a missing person, he felt bad as a parent and wondered where he went wrong. It came in an email, of Dae announcing her departure from his life. She made reference to how she didn’t want to carry on the family business, how she hated living her life like nothing happened especially after the aftermath of the accident. But what broke Chenle’s heart the most, was how she begged for him not to look for her or reach out to her, that she didn’t want him as a part of her life anymore, that she wanted to cut all ties with family and go her separate way.

The fact that this was a personalized email only sent to him and not her mother or sister, made Chenle believe that he was at fault for Dae coming to this decision. He didn’t even know where she was.

All he knows is that two months have passed and he hasn’t heard a word from her. If this is what she wanted to pursue then he didn’t want to hold her back.

That’s what he thought, but to Chungdae seeing her husband deteriorate and morph into a gloomy glum man made her miss the fluffy, peculiar, mischievous man she married. There was no light in her husband anymore. He just went to work, came home, ate in his study and fell asleep and repeated the same things everyday but like a droned out machine with no means of survival. Even when finally moving into their enlarged mansion and away from the rental home, he seemed the most distant.

The move in took about a week to settle in as the women were pampering around the house making it more suitable to their liking while at the same time modernizing it to their taste. Despite its beauty on the outside as well as inside, the house was very lonely for Chenle and he hated spending time with his family. And that was because of how they drifted apart. Chungdae and Yezi loved the baby, and Chenle didn’t.

That’s until 4 months later. He gets an off day and decides to spend it at home instead of the office. As predicted Yezi’s with her baby and Chungdae nearby Yezi. Chenle has the first layer living room all to himself and catches up on the latest informatics, however he gets up from his seat deciding to get his laptop and wor while watching the news. It’s on his way walking through the wide hallway does he get to the staircase and sees a little body bag on the floor dressed of a crocodile onesie.

It’s Yezi’s child. She’s on the top of the staircase, seemingly getting her way down by crawling on each step carefully. Chenle, like usual whenever seeing her, pays her no mind and climbs up the long flight of stairs and ignores her getting into his study room and getting his light weighing laptop as well as gadget bag before going back down the stairs. Expecting to see her still at the same spot his heart jumps out of his chest when seeing her on the last few steps but somehow tumbles and rolls down the remaining steps before smacking her head on the tiled ground.

“Shit-” He rushes down the steps and looks at the little girl who’s flat on the floor. He gets near her and gets stunned when she’s kissing the floor. Upon seeing him, she laughs joyously and crawls to sit up on the floor. He sighs in frustration. “Honey! Come get the baby.”

He walks past her and heads outside the backyard porch. He takes a seat on the veranda table with which had a serene view of his large backyard. Sometimes the thought of being rich made him feel better about his problems, as long as he had money he was okay to provide for himself any vacation he needed. With his iPad channeled to the news, while his laptop focused on the project and the tablet on notepad mode, upon seeing nature and the sky Chenle’s able to work effortlessly and soundly with no disruptions.

But he speaks too soon because Areum (being somewhat around 8 months) creeps her way outside on the wooden floor before scrambling out on the grass. Chenle has his eyes on the screen but yet after spotting her he exhales in annoyance. “Honey!” He yells out hoping that she can come and take this baby back inside. “Reckless.” He hadn’t set any barricades for the baby because the baby was always with Yezi, so he didn’t feel the need to secure any areas in the house.

And because of not securing the baby crawls on the grass outside of the shade and explores around. She’s a walking and falling mess- but with a joyous and jolly laugh, whenever she falls down she gets back up and carries on walking. In her onesie she’s playing on the floor by laying down, scampering around, attempting to stand up- she’s like a dog and it doesn’t help when Chenle notices Daegal too surrounding the baby and playing with her.

Her loud squeal in pain causes him to snap his head away from the screen and to her. She wails out after stomping with her hand on the sprinklers and the water splashes on her, and Daegal joins in barking at the sprinklers when it starts spluttering out water. Chenle tsks and ignores her crying, placing his air pods on focusing on his work. That wasn’t his problem… but at the same time he can’t help but be cautious of her moves. “Chungdae!” He yells out.

With no success in getting Chungdae to come and get the baby, Chenle continues with work and ignores the child almost entirely. It’s not until she finds her way back in his line of vision under the shade and sitting down on the wooden floor playing with things, assembly Daegal’s toys does he sigh out. He doesn’t care about her, he only cares that the baby was disturbing his peace and has somehow been set free to move around the house. Where’s Yezi? Where’s Chungdae?

Meanwhile Areum in her own world attempts to stand and walks a few steps only to tumble on the ground in her onesies, what catches his eyes is that every time she’d fall there would be a smile on her face, and unknowingly a smile would also be on his face for a spilt second. He tries as best as he can to overlook the little baby girl, but she makes it so hard, when slowly but surely she moves closer to him.

The next to time he looks away from the screen, she’s standing by leaning on the table bouncing to inaudible music. Upon getting his attention, Areum smiles and moves by hurriedly walking to the chair where he’s sitting and leans on his leg.

“No, no.” Chenle scolds. “Don’t touch me.” Chenle shoves her hands off his thighs.

Areum can only sit on the ground while looking up to the older man with wonder in her eyes. Her eyes that are just so precious and almost melt Chenle’s heart, but his quick in shifting away. In shifting away she only gets closer to him before yawning and rubbing on her eye in a messy state.

She gets back up and holds onto his thigh while minding her own business and playing with Daegal’s toy. Chenle tries not to shove her away, afraid he’ll hurt her but at the same time his eyes constantly move to her wondering if she’s okay.

She’s banging the toy on his thigh and making gurgling sounds while playing with herself, leaving Chenle to simply work and not mind her.

However, after some time, she grows quiet, and still while balancing on Chenle, she slides down his leg and leans her head on his leg. Chenle notices this and tentatively shakes his leg. “Hey,”

Areum looks up, her eyes blinking and wipes on them before making herself comfortable again on his leg. He leans back on his seat after a certain time and looks at her. Her posture looks bent and surely uncomfortable but it doesn’t stop her from sleeping. It’s when her neck starts wobbling and craning does he find his arms stretching down and his hands carrying and lifting her fazed sleepy state.

“You’re heavy,” He mummers before she hurriedly fixes herself comfortably in his hands by laying her body on his chest and her head against the croak of his neck. Chenle is stiff for a minute, and snaps out of it when feeling his dog by his foot. Looking down he sees Daegal wrapping herself in a ball and making herself comfortable. Chenle leans back on his seat and gently rests his hand on the baby’s back, the other arm holding her in place.

He soon finds himself dozing off after listening to the commentary with ear pods in his ear and his vision blurring while he succumbs to the sleep.

“Mum? I can’t find Areum anywhere,” Yezi looks panicked when waking up her mum. Chungdae blinks in haziness but after hearing Yezi’s concern she’s up on her feet.

“She was sleeping with me,”

“Well where is she?” Yezi in heaps of fright dashes out the room and continues to search all over the house, calling her name. She even gets upset that the house is so big. The only place she ever spent time with Areum was on the second floor where her room was- but after searching the entire second floor her heart is in frantic panic when looking all over. “Areum?”

In seeing Daegal stretching by the outside porch door and entering the house- Yezi scampers towards the door being breathless hoping to see her child. But her eyes are too stunned to move when she takes in the sight right before her. Right underneath the shade of the veranda, she sees her dad carrying her baby. The sight itself is wholesome with her dad’s eyes closed and embracing her child in such a manner of protecting her. Her heart fills up with an overwhelming longing. Seeing this sight only enlightens her.

Despite having non-verbal communications with her dad, Yezi had a slight assurance that her father still cared about her every time he paid for her private lessons with the tutor, every time he gave Chungdae money to give her, or even the little moments when he’d stoke up on her favorite foods whenever they’d run out. Despite not talking, Yezi knew that her dad still cared for her. And seeing this sight of him holding her child, gives her some sort of hope. Ever since Areum was born, Chenle never ever held her and refused to do so even in private when Chungdae would ask for help.

But now seeing how comfortable her baby is sleeping on her dad makes her smile. Deciding not to interrupt them, she moves back in the house and informs Chungdae that Areum is safe. After an hour or so, Chenle is awakened when Chungdae lightly tries to get Areum off his sleeping figure. He finds himself holding tighter onto the little girl, but eventually slowly let’s go, nodding his head when Chungdae states that her nappy is full. However, much to Areum’s distaste and drowsy state- refuses to let go of Chenle and holds tighter even whimpering out for the touch of the man who rarely holds her.

“What do you wanna do again?” Chenle asks, while removing his earphone and seemingly looks a little more awake then before. Especially when noticing that the child doesn’t want to let go of him.

“I want to change her diaper, it’s full and she’s gonna get rash,” Chungdae tries again to pull Areum off and Chenle gently tries to stretch her towards his wife, but Areum cries only resulting in Chenle holding onto her again.

“Okay, okay, it’s okay, let’s go,” Chungdae is surprised when seeing Chenle stands up with the child and they both embark inside the house going up the stairs. All this while Chenle holds onto an awake yet sleepy Areum and pats her back lightly. “Where’s Yezi?”

“Studying in her room, we can just go to our room,”

Chenle nods his head and upon getting to their room, he carefully lays Areum down while assuring the little wailing baby of his presence by playing with her hand while Chungdae begins removing her clothes and changing her. Her whimpers die down when Chenle holds onto her hand and playfully tells her it’s okay. “It’s okay, it’s okay, it’s just a nappy change,”

Chungdae hurries on to changing and cleaning the baby, but at the same time she pays attention to how Areum watches Chenle in awe and silences down whilst smiling and being entertained by him. When she’s done and dresses Areum in another onesie, Areum being tired yet awake and seemingly just staring at Chenle warms Chungdae’s heart.

“What’s wrong with her?” Chenle gently asks while lying on the bed and looking into the young baby’s black eyes. “She’s tired but she doesn’t want to sleep,” Chenle whispers.

“She can’t stop looking at you, at her grandfather,” Chungdae whispers back.

Despite Chenle not liking that word especially used for this child… his heart can’t help when he sees just how much curiosity is in the little girls’ eyes. “Sleep,” he smiles lightly when her features get into a drowsy sleep but her eyes are quick to open to make sure that Chenle is still in front of her. “You won’t miss anything. I’ll still be here. Sleep okay,” Chenle adjusts his posture on the bed to be at the same level as her while he also makes himself comfortable. Soon enough, after much ogling Areum falls asleep.

In Chungdae’s head, the little girl just wanted to take in this special moment of her bonding with her grandfather and didn’t want to miss out on seeing his face close to hers.

And for a few more days, although its scarce to see Chenle with Areum, Areum feels a tad bit comfortable in always approaching him. Whether by running to him whenever her mum would chase her and tell her it’s time to bath, or even by following Chenle around once she’s spotted him. In all honesty, at first it was annoying for Chenle to be followed by the miniature creature bastard child. However, he got used to her petite figure and he’d always be cautious of her movements. Chenle purposely acknowledges her and on other days it seems like he’s almost waiting for his chance to pick her up. And always waits for the signaling. It can be Chungdae asking for help with the little girl, and Chenle simply carries her and holds her while Chungdae works. Other times it’s when he gets back from work and already sees the baby crawling on the floor but when seeing him she attempts to stand and scampers in his direction.

Yezi only having seen the sight once, is surprised when one day, a Saturday, her dad is at home instead of being at work. And it so happens that when Chungdae leaves the house to go to the market, Areum won’t stop crying while Yezi is studying.

“Areum, please stop crying.” Yezi slightly raises her voice being upset. She stands up and bobs on Areum while holding her notebook in the other hand and tries to study, but Areum carries on crying. “Areum!”

That only makes Areum wail out more even going as far as hitting her mum wanting to get down.

“Areum what do you want!? I just wanna study-”

“Hey, hey, hey.” Chenle opens up the door stepping into the room cautiously. “What’s wrong?” He asks while struggling to hear through Areum’s screeches.

“I just wanna study but Areum keeps crying, I gave her milk and food, gave her bath but she won’t stop crying, I don’t know what to do and mum isn’t here-” Yezi herself also looks like she’s on the verge of crying, both from stress of the exam as well as her crying baby. She’s so overwhelmed by her emotions that when her dad offers to watch over Areum, she agrees without a second thought and continues studying while her dad shuts the door and disappears with Areum. It’s only when she’s calmed down and easily studies does she realise that her dad actually spoke to her in a somewhat decent conversation and even offered to take Areum.

Her heart, for a second, seems like it stops beating because of the shock that just happened. Carefully, no longer being interested in studying and wants to see with her own eyes, she walks out her room and tries to spot her dad with her child. She moves all over the house and even outside, but when she doesn’t see her dad, she panics and before she can even call out to them both- she’s surprised when seeing Chungdae block her mouth looking ecstatically pleased and happy. Gently pulling Yezi to the kitchen, they’re both caught in a trans of watching Chenle and the baby.

Chenle is holding on Areum on one side of his hip while holding a piece of a pineapple on a fork. He nibbles only a little and then moves the fork towards Areum. Areum sucks on the fruit and backs away with a sour look on her face just as Chenle moves the fork back silently laughing at her reaction. However, when Areum pounces on and eagerly tries to grab the fork from Chenle’s other hand with extreme force.

And it seems that it’s through that one little moment that a serene feeling of joy passes through the house for everyone. It’s through Areum that somehow the sense of ‘family’ began making sense again. As days pass, it seems like all the family wants to do is build their life and remain connected and not look back anymore. They each continue to strive in building a better life for themselves, Chungdae as the joy of the house continues to encourage as well as bring the family together, Yezi as a persistent graduate embarks on a journey of making her dad proud as well as herself and her baby, Chenle rightfully taking the head in making sure that this time his family is safe and that nothing can hurt them. At the same time, Areum grows in the love and embrace of all her family.

And Areum’s first word much to all their surprise is “Gwanpa”. Chenle never knew the excitement he’d feel when hearing the form of words leave the little girl’s mouth, his little bean. And hearing the word from her mouth, makes him wish that his whole family be together and that he’s willing to reconcile with Dae. No matter what. Which is why, when he sends her an email years later, he’s heart is open to accept whatever the outcome is- but he mostly leans onto the best. He hopes that his daughter Dae, will come back to him.

Especially since she approves his email and accepts his invitation, asking if she can come with her boyfriend who’s helped her get back into shape. Chenle at first is surprised with joy to hear from his daughter, but his surprise turns to stun when he learns who she’s been dating and spending time with for the past years. But all in all, he figures that it’s time to let bygones be bygones, especially within their 5th year, a parole letter from the court comes in and asks whether or not they’ll accept Donghyuck’s appeal for parole.

“Do you think that’s a good idea?” Chungdae asks while sitting next to her husband on their bed late at night, as they stare at the email together.

Chenle inhales in deeply, re-reading his email before nodding his head. “We’ve moved passed the past and all I want to do is move on. I’m sure from his appeal he won’t be a bother to us. And I sure as hell don’t want to receive emails about them anymore. Granting his parole as well as accepting never to receive emails like this again, will allow our family to finally have the peace we’ve been seeking for. Nothing bad will happen,”

Once Chenle sends in the email, the receivers are prompt to already writing up Donghyuck’s release paper’s and setting up for him to leave within a 5-day notice.

S2:EP7-14

[5 days later: Thursday 9h30 a.m.]

Donghyuck is up and refreshed before anyone else in his cell. His eyes are trained on the barred windows to the light pouring out of the clouds. This is the day he would step foot outside of this damn prison in hopes never to return again.

“Can’t believe you’re leaving so soon,” Mark mumbles looking up to Donghyuck from his bed. Still being under the covers he watches his friend who’s got bruises on his nose, chin and cheek bone, but still his enthusiasm spreads all over his face. “You’re a free man but you’re already looking so beat,”

“Fuck off Mark.” Donghyuck runs his hands through his head taking a seat on his own bed. His head running free and wild with thoughts. But the one thing that’s pressing his head is that he never wants to come back to prison again. He misses his mum (who has not been sending in her letters to him), he misses Renjun who he heard from the ward guards that he was released 3 years ago. He misses his family, and he knows that they might not be too excited to see him when he gets back, but he wants to show them just how much he’s changed in his mindset. He wants to try and be the son his mum has always wanted, and he wants to be a big brother to Renjun, but most importantly, he wants to live his life the right way. “Even though I’m fucked up, I want to live honestly,” He whispers out.

Mark scoffs and rolls his eyes. “You’re all talk but, you’ll be back here before you know it. There’s going to be something that will just piss you off and make you go crazy,”

Donghyuck tries not to pay attention to Mark and only focuses on the positive, and he gets relieved when he hears his prison cell buzzer ring and looks up to the door that has a square space with bars. Seeing the officer Park Jisung call his name, Donghyuck eagerly stands up placing his hands behind his head as procedure. Officer Park Jisung gets in the cell accompanied by another guard (who stands like a guard dog and watches Mark and the other prisoners making sure that they don’t try and move). Jisung pulls Donghyuck’s hands down and into handcuffs. “Good morning Lee Donghyuck. My name is Officer Park, I’ll be in charge of settling your release papers and getting you out of here. Any questions you have will have to wait until we get to the holding center.”

Donghyuck feels relief wash over him that his appeal had been approved and that he can hear his freedom being doors away. He thought surely that he’d be rejected, but much to his surprise they granted him freedom.

“Why’d they say yes?” Donghyuck asks regardless of what Jisung said.

“Any questions you may have will have to wait until we get to the holding center.” Jisung repeats sternly.

This makes Mark snicker a little while watching his friend being taken away. Donghyuck looks back to Mark with a formidable smile. “Good luck Mark,”

“See you soon bro,” Mark winks his eye and breathes out when their door is banged shut causing the metallic locks to seal up the door again. “I’ve gotta get out of here,”

The metal gates containing the prison facility closes after Donghyuck steps out. He takes a look back to the buildings that enclosed him and kept him for 5 years. He rubs his wrists looking up to the hot sun taking in the air of his new freedom. Finally, he’s out.

He expects to see his mum as usual, yet when there’s no sign of humans around the area he hangs his jacket behind his back before looking left and right and beginning his walk.

By the time Donghyuck’s legs wear out and he’s tired both physically as well as mentally, he stops by a gas station hoping to make a phone call. He barely has enough coins to make a calling, but he manages with the little he has. He leans by the wall and taps on the memorized phone numbers calling on his mum.

Thankfully the phone clicks. “Hello?”

“Mum,” Donghyuck’s voice is raspy but it can’t contain his own happiness when hearing his mum’s voice. She doesn’t sound sick.

“Oh,” Her voice fades. “Donghyuck is that you?”

“Yes, uh, I got released today,”

“I was aware.”

There’s a moment of silence that passes between them, with Donghyuck waiting eagerly to hear her voice but yet she doesn’t reciprocate his enthusiasm. Sensing that she’s not going to speak he speaks before his minutes run out. “Uhm, I was wondering…if you could let me stay over at your place…” He scratches the back of his head, feeling small and crushed that his mother doesn’t sound pleased to even hear him. “Just until I can find a place to stay,”

Her silence lasts long only causing Donghyuck to worry.

“Please…please mum?” He begs. “I… I won’t stay long. Please, I promise to be on my best behavior, I-”

“You have less than 1 minute.” The operating voice cuts in between, causing Donghyuck to curse. When the line connects again, he waits a bit to hear from his mum, but she still doesn’t speak.

“Okay fine. Just for tonight.” Donghyuck lets out as a last resort. “I’ll be gone in the morning.”

Just when Donghyuck isn’t expecting his mum to accept, she does. “Fine. But we changed the address. Right now, I’m at work, Renjun will arrive in an hour or so, you’ll have to wait outside. We no longer live in 84 Guryong. We’re in Estate Pent Thirty-f-”

“Shit.” Donghyuck tries to look for pocket change to carry on the call, but it hangs and he curses. “Fuck.” A few seconds of rest leads to him looking at the street map outside the gas store to find the address the his mum mentioned. “Estate Pent…” His eyes widen slightly seeing that the new residence is in an area whereby he’s never lived in.

It’s also quite far from where he is. He takes a deep breath and begins walking…

“Need a lift?”

Donghyuck’s ears are alert when hearing a voice. He looks behind him to a guy smiling at a girl. The girl continues walking minding her own business and not focusing on the guy who tries desperately hard to get her attention including whistling. Donghyuck breathes out a chuckle. “Still a dick.”

Jungwoo much to his own dissatisfaction rolls his eyes when the girl ignores him. “Fine. Go away with your flat ass,”

“I gotta advice you bro, chasing chicks decades younger then you will lead you to prison,” Donghyuck speaks loud enough to get the attention of the male in the car. Jungwoo peers to the voice and instantly a smile coats his face.

“Ehy, the boy who went to prison,” Jungwoo stops his engine and gets out the car just as Donghyuck walks over to the man. They get into a bro hug doing a little handshakes before Jungwoo goes all in for a hugr causing Donghyuck to stand in shock before he pushes Jungwoo off him. Jungwoo laughs it off fixing his cow boy hat on his head looking jolly. “Man, how the hell are you out? Did you escape? ‘Cause I know for sure your sentence was much longer then this? Where’s your other half by the way? You hungry? I was heading to lunch, come on. There’s a new joint that opened up serving amazing lobster- you know what it can be my treat, order and eat as much as you like. It’s good seeing you, the streets have been crazy with this boy by the name of Shotaro being all over the place causing havoc on every territory. Thank goodness you’re back, you can teach him a lesson. Wait, did I actually tell you about Sungchan? He was sentenced life in prison just yesterday, but wait that brings me back to you, how are you out? How-”

One thing Donghyuck liked about his old friend Jungwoo was how he always did the talking and never really allowed anyone else to talk but himself. He’d not only ask questions, but he’d answer his own questions and most of the time Donghyuck thinks that Jungwoo doesn’t really care about anyone’s opinion because he’s always talking and likes hearing his voice. So Donghyuck simply sits in the front seat, resting out his legs and allowing his seat to recline backwards so that he can take time to breathe in from his heavy walking. Hopefully when done eating, he’ll set the street address of his mum’s new place.

After a heavy and amazing meal, Donghyuck is seated outside on a bench in the park under a tree facing in the direction of a clean and solid apartment building. Not only did it reside in a well off area, but the people themselves walking in and out of the apartment looked stable. At first he wanted to go in, but seeing how he was dressed in dark clothes from the night of the accident, he knew that the guards wouldn’t let him in. So now he sits outside, waiting for Renjun or even his mum to show up.

He waits for a really long time until his eyes squint a little by the appearance of a person which resembles Renjun. However, this person has got short black hair, looks angry and is dressed in all black clothes… well his jersey is a mixture of black and white stripes, but it sure as hell makes him look so different.

“Renjun!” Donghyuck yells out the name of his brother. There’s a fleeting happiness that gets upon Donghyuck’s heart when seeing the boy. Just two days ago, he reminisced on the feelings of how he felt for disappointing Renjun. So seeing him causes him happiness. He stretches his legs and begins moving towards the exit of the park going over to Renjun who stands frozen looking at Donghyuck as if it’s a horror movie. “Hey,” Donghyuck greets with a wholeheartedly.

However, Renjun is anything but cheerful. Up close, there’s a permanent resting scowl on his face, and with the short hair Donghyuck can see the faint lines of wrinkles which help to make Renjun look even more angry. “What are you doing here?”

Donghyuck is confused by the tone tilting his head with a confused face. “What’s up with the glum face?”

“You didn’t answer my question.” Renjun remarks looking closed off. “What are you doing here?”

“Mum gave me the ad-”

“The hell she did.” Renjun says distastefully. “Why’re you out? Didn’t you have a full sentence of 15 years?”

Donghyuck tries not to get angry, by holding in his tongue and poking it on the corner of his lip. “You also don’t want me here?” It’s clear how from his reaction that he also didn’t want him around. And to be fair, Donghyuck can understand why, but the fact that Renjun doesn’t even look the least bit fazed makes Donghyuc upset. “Well I called mum and she said I could stay here for-”

“You’re not gonna stay here. Her health’s been good for the past years now, she doesn’t need stress in her life anymore. Neither do I, so go back where you belong behind bars and out of everyone’s hair.” Renjun gives Donghyuck a dirty look before walking past him.

Donghyuck is quick in stopping his brother by the arm before looking to him. “Look Renjun. I’m sorry-”

“Save it. And leave me alone.” Renjun yanks his arm away. “I don’t care if she gave you the address, you’re not getting in. Find another place, in fact consider yourself cut from our lives. We don’t want you here.”

Donghyuck is about to comment out he has no right to speak, but he holds his tongue shutting his eyes tightly when thinking of just how much he tried his best to change in prison. If he continues to allow his tongue to be the master of everything, he’ll end up in prison again. Which is why he lets Renjun go. He stands in place and sighs, before going back to the park and sitting down on the bench with his brain raging but seemingly trying to remain calm. He reminds himself, that he deserves Renjun’s anger. But mostly Donghyuck fears just how much prison has changed his brother. Not only appearance wise, but internally as well. The Renjun that Donghyuck remembers was timid and always on edge, was always looked down upon and was a whining coward. This Renjun is gritty, unwavering, strong minded and angry. Donghyuck can blame it on the prison experience and also with the fact that he may or may not be his brother’s favorite person right now- but damn he’s changed so much. Was this his behavior everywhere, or was it only because Donghyuck was there. Whatever it is, Donghyuck hopes that it’ll pass.

With all the time he spent in prison trying to change his ways and character, he can’t come home to everyone already given up on him. He wanted one more chance, to redeem himself as well as prove that he wasn’t an unlucky fuckup. He needed just one more chance.

And so when the afternoon rolls in and the sky changes colors from blue to a cream shade of orange, Donghyuck gets up when seeing the all too familiar posture of his mother. Donghyuck can already tell that so much has changed. He’s not only happy to see her walking strongly and with a smile on her face, but also she looks really good. She’s dressed in a beautiful floral dress and her back is actually not hunched over. She looks strong. And that makes Donghyuck’s emotions flatter. Seeing his mother after so long causes him to be slightly emotional. Because he knows that soon, her smile will fade when looking at him.

It doesn’t even take a second for her smile to disappear upon noticing him crossing the street over to where she is. Her smile instantly vanishes when Donghyuck’s gaze meets hers. He tries not to break down, but the tears are already building up. His mum hates him. He can’t even look at her, as his eyes blur and he hates on himself for ever using her to the point where he takes away her smile.

However, when Donghyuck’s head hangs and he stops walking, his mum sighs sadly upon seeing her son. She slowly makes her way to him. When standing in front of him, her hand lands on his shoulder. He doesn’t look up and neither does she try to get him to look up. Honestly when he called, she just wished that she changed her number because she didn’t want to speak to him. And seeing him now, she thinks of how much worry he’s put her through. In all the times that he went to prison, she would work her hardest to try and help her son. Everyone called her names, called him names, and it tore her image not only as mother but a woman. Her son was her greatest embarrassment, but he was all she had. And despite the humiliation she’d go through, she still tried, she would drain herself day and night to get some sort of money to bail him out, some money to feed him, cloth him, help him start afresh because this was her son whom she loved so much. At some point, she even became religious and prayed for her son to change. She believed that he would change someday.

But that day, 5 years ago at the court room, she realized just how far gone her son had gone. He seemed beyond saving, and there was nothing she could do. When Donghyuck led Renjun to prison, something in her snapped. She didn’t want to be mother who failed. She knew she did nothing wrong and always corrected him, but his behavior was not a character she raised. So upon Renjun, beaten, in cuffs, accused, mocked and even humiliated- she saw herself in him. That day, her heart broke in ways that her abusive husband had never broken her before. Enough was enough. She needed to break free from the chains of being broken. All she wanted was strength and chance to set her life straight, so when they both went to prison, she was left alone and had been granted a chance to change her life. And when Renjun finished serving his sentence, she made sure that she would be strong for the son she didn’t deserve. She tried to be the mother she had always envisioned herself to be. And thankfully, day by day with a grateful son in her corner she slowly regained the strength she had lost, she became into a better and healthier version of herself.

With a good son in her corner, who always took care of her, reminded her everyday why she was special, she knew that her life was finally making sense. Life was supposed to be this way. And she never wanted to let this moment go. But now standing in front of Donghyuck, her son, her past- she’s expecting to be warm and welcoming to him, but she can’t find it in herself to even smile for her son. But as a way of moving on, she rubs his back. “You’re staying for tonight. You leave in the morning.”

Donghyuck tightens his jaw and nods his head. His heart broken. But he can’t say anything as he feels the lump clogging his throat. He ends up walking, following behind her. The guard is alert when seeing Donghyuck, as hours before Renjun warned him not to let him in. “Good afternoon Mrs Lee,”

“Hi Chanyeol,” She smiles warmly. “Any letter for me?”

The man smiles and shakes his head, always being kind and friendly to the middle aged woman who had nothing but a big heart whenever seeing him. “No, your son took them up,” Chanyeol clears his throat motioning to Donghyuck. “He informed me that, I shouldn’t let the gentleman in.”

She looks back to Donghyuck who still had his hand holding on his leather jacket. Sighing, she turns back to Chanyeol and shakes her head. “I’m guessing he was upset right?”

“Very,” Chanyeol smiles politely. “Haven’t seen him that angry before.”

“Hopefully it’s short lived,” She motions behind her. “This is a guest, he’s only visiting for the night, so don’t worry,”

It’s more than a blow for Donghyuck when he hears his mum calling him a guest. Did he really lose her trust? He tries not to say anything and follows behind his mum who makes her way to the elevator of the polished looking apartment.

Donghyuck doesn’t look around and simply keeps his head down, his own thoughts weighing him down. There’s a feeling of loneliness that engulfs him in anger, but he refuses to display or manifest it. He’s so deep in his thoughts that he doesn’t even hear his mother who speaks. “Have you eaten?”

Hearing the silence, she’s reminded of how her son barely even spoke to her decently in the first place, and so she doesn’t even try to create small conversation with him when entering the elevator. They make it to the 7th floor and Donghyuck follows behind until his mother stops by a door.

Before even opening the door, Donghyuck’s nostrils sniff the scent of a delicious aroma. Hearing his mother laugh, he looks up when seeing the door open revealing a delighted looking Renjun. “Guess what I made? Come in quick before it gets cold, I just took it off the stove now,”

She unlocks the gates and walks in, allowing for Donghyuck to follow in the lively lit home. It feels like a home with all the warmth and love. Already he feels out of place, but there’s nothing he can do but follow in. His mum closes the gate behind still chatting on with Renjun who disappeared somewhere. Donghyuck turns his head to the walls, seeing portraits and pictures of just her and Renjun. There are some medals hung on the wall and trophies as well. “Wow,” He mutters underneath his breath.

The entrance of the house is a narrow hallway, leading to a living room and there’s a door on the side for the kitchen. Donghyuck follows his mum who enters the kitchen. He stands by the doorway watching his mother walking to the stove where Renjun is. The kitchen is large enough that it even has a table and four chairs around it.

Donghyuck wants to walk in- but the moment the lively chatter stops between his mother and Renjun- he looks up. And just as he guessed, Renjun has stern cold eyes fixed on him. “What the hell.” He mutters and peaks at his mum. “You let him in?”

“Just for tonight sweety, he said he’d be gone by the morning,” She gives him a pat on the back.

“But why’d you let him in?” Renjun’s shoulders slump and he crosses his arms. “I thought you said you’re done with him?”

“Renjun, please,” Donghyuck notes how she tries to calm Renjun down by holding onto the sides of his arm. “I know what I said, but it’s just for tonight-”

“I hate to break it to you mum, but that’s how it always starts. You let him stay the night, and the next thing we know he’s out and about causing trouble and continues hiding out here until we’ve got a whole bunch of unwanted debt collectors and police officers barking down on the door-”

“Renjun.” She calls earnestly. “Don’t talk like that, stop it. He’s your brother you-”

“He’s your son, not my brother. He never was.” Renjun drops his arms and turns back to the stove causing for Donghyuck to poke on the side of his mouth with his tongue, while he watches his mother look nonchalant. “I only made enough for you and me.” Renjun turns around and begins plating his meal as well as for his mum. Before he takes a seat grumpily eating on his food.

“You’ve gotten awfully comfortable-”

“And you’ve outstayed your welcome and family privileges.” He sharply remarks glaring at Donghyuck. “You’re making everyone uncomfortable, do us a favor and just-”

“Renjun.” A warning tone leaves their mum’s lips. “Eat your food.” She inhales sharply running her hand through her hair. “Are you hungry Donghyuck?”

He only ate the meal that Jungwoo gave him in the morning, and even if he kind of felt hungry, he didn’t want to. He shakes his head. “It’s okay you can enjoy your food. Uh, while moving did you take any of my stuff-”

“Yes-”

“I threw them out.” Renjun cuts his mum off. Her gaze that penetrates the back of his head is strong in shock. “They were an omen and reflection of bad luck.”

“Renjun-”

“You know what,” Donghyuck grates his teeth before biting on his lip. “Fuck this. I’m leaving.”

“Donghyuck-”

Donghyuck shakes his head pulling his leather jacket back on and moving the door. He opens it only to be stopped by the gate.

“Donghyuck don’t leave.” His mum carefully holds onto his arm looking disheartened. “You said you’d stay for the night-”

“I’m not wanted here anymore, clearly, so just fucking open the gates and I’ll be out of your life forever. You wanted me gone anyway, so I’ll do you a favor and leave.”

“Donghyu-”

“Mum please.” Donghyuck stresses out through his teeth closing his eyes feeling the tears. “You’re clearly fucking healthy and you look great. I don’t want to fuck things up again, so just please open the gates. I’ll go and I promise not to fucking disturb you again.”

For some reason, that only makes her heart hurt. “Just for tonight- I’ll make dinner, please-”

Donghyuck shakes his head and wipes his eyes before forcing his arms out of his mother’s hands and walks back to the kitchen. “Come fucking open the gates or else I’ll break it open.”

“No need to tell me twice.” Renjun grumbles leaving his chopsticks and digging into his pockets bringing out keys. Renjun moves to the gates ignoring his mum who gives him upset eyes. Once he unlocks the gates, Donghyuck pushes past him and leaves.

“Donghyuck.” She calls once, but it’s useless when he turns the corner and instead of using the elevator takes the stairs all the way down.

The security guard, Chanyeol notes that Donghyuck is leaving and he doesn’t say anything.

Donghyuck is angry. Enraged by the stupid tears that clog his vision as he keeps walking away. He wants to hit something- to punch someone- to scream- to shout- to find some way to let his anger out- any other way except through tears. He finds his way back on the park bench underneath the tree as he holds his head in between his hands and stays silent. He sniffs here and there but he doesn’t cry. He allows for himself to feel the emotions of frustration. It’s the fact that there’s a whole in his heart and that he can feel it bleeding- it’s the fact that he wants to let it out but he knows that he can’t let it out without harming someone. But he doesn’t want to harm anyone- he doesn’t want to prove to Renjun or even Mark that he’s the same. Which is why when the first few come out, he doesn’t hold back and allows his shoulders to shudder and his voice to croak as he let’s out his emotions, his tears, his cry.

The whole night, Donghyuck covers himself in self-pity while contemplating on what to do in his life, where and how to try and live an honest life. Unlike when he was in prison, seeing his mother again made him realize that she’s always been there through thick and thin, even though he let her down she was everything a mother could be- he just never cherished her enough and that she was the only one. In her soul she would sacrifice for him to have the best in life…and because he took her for granted, he needed to let her know that he wants to make it right…he wants to touch her soul again, to at least bring a smile on her face. So before the early morning, he’s up from the bench and walks around the area. He cleans up his face in the public toilet washing his face and looking himself in the mirror giving himself some encouragement.

“I look so pathetic.” He mutters before leaving the bathroom.

Donghyuck doesn’t fret when the nearby stores don’t have any positions open, he doesn’t fret when he gets approached by some the old friends he knew who used to steal and sell on the sides of the roads, he walks away from them and persists on his journey to find work. It would’ve been easier if he didn’t get many employers asking for paperwork, degrees or even cv- it was even worse when they recognized him as someone who had a prison record, much worse when they didn’t know and they asked and he had to be honest with them. It’s hard work looking for a job, but just thinking of his mother allows him to try.

Day in and day out, Donghyuck finds himself barely making it through. On the first night he slept in the park opposite his mother’s apartment, but after much nights of sleeping on a bench- welcoming arms came from another homeless man who told him about a shelter that took in ‘straymen’ like himself. A nonprofit organization that helped to feed the needy and gave water once a week. He somehow got attached to the group of stray kids… homeless stray men who stuck together and would share everything they had with each other. Donghyuck didn’t fret when within a week, he found himself sleeping under bridges, on street corners and even sleeping standing up against a building. It wasn’t much, but he got work as a car washer. It wasn’t much because it wasn’t even professional as they’d randomly go up to cars by a traffic light and offer to wash windows. Not only washing cars but he got multiple side jobs; handing out newspapers, collecting any forms of plastic to get recycled and even helping people carry bags that were heavy.

It’s the most humiliated Donghyuck had ever felt, but as long as he was making money- he endured it. He just needed to reach his goal, to at least go to an internet café and forge out documents with his qualification. He didn’t make it far in school because of lack of funds, but Donghyuck did do side programs and got some degree. Even though forging out documents was wrong, Donghyuck had enough of being humiliated.

Together, on most days, he found himself attending ‘church’ with the group of stray kids who would go to pray.

When he thought of religion, he only thought of his mother. There was no one else committed like her when it came to going every day, praying every day and even giving in money she didn’t have. Donghyuck only came because it felt as a way to be close to her.

So he wasn’t expecting when one Sunday after the service he’d see a bright eyed woman waiting for him. His heart felt heavy for a second when seeing his mum standing and smiling. The automatic tears that seemed to only come when he acknowledged her. He looks behind him, wondering whether Renjun was around, because ever since he came out of prison she never smiled at him- so it wouldn’t make sense that 2 months later she’s outside with a warm smile.

Donghyuck scratches his neck and looks away already disqualifying himself from her gaze. Yet he freezes when hearing his name being called. “Donghyuck,”

His head slowly turns back to the spot whereby he saw his mum. His shoulders hang when he notices that she’s approaching him. He can’t even look at her in the eye knowing that he can’t contain the tears just as much as he can’t contain the anger.

Her eyes take in his appearance. He’s dressed in the same clothes that she last saw him in. Although his pants looked faded and bit dirty, his leather jacket was worn out and had some leather falling out. His hair was messy and looked combed down only with his fingers. Even though she’s not able to see his face, she can see how much weight he lost. Prison must’ve fed him well because when she last saw him he looked in good physical shape, but now he looks starved with his jaws smaller and face small. Her son…

It took one tiring, long and so heartbreaking conversation with Renjun, for her to feel so much anguish and guilt for neglecting her son. Despite all that he has done, he was still her son, and if she could protect one and groom him well, then surely she could try again with another. Especially when acknowledging that something was different about him.

“How was the service?” She asks warmly, her smile radiating joy as it covers her sadness.

Donghyuck clears his throat and looks back. Despite it being a welcoming place, he could sense the stares of the people around him and even with a message and word so strong, Donghyuck has never felt so empty before in his own life. His eyes turn back to the ground and he shrugs his shoulders not uttering a word.

This break his mother’s heart. Her son… “Are you hungry?”

Donghyuck sniffs back, blocking out the tears that attempt to fall. He hated how glum and gloomy he’s been feeling and he especially hates how his mother is here. “Uh, I actually have to get going.” Donghyuck doesn’t look to her when he turns around and carries on walking without stopping, even when she calls out his name on repeat. He shuts his ears and even runs- it hurts so much. His heart hurts so much, but he doesn’t allow himself time to grieve as he carries on his walk getting to the back of the shelter where he spent most of his days when he had nothing to do.

He busks on the ground sniffing and wiping his eyes trying to compose himself.

“Donghyuck-”

His head snaps up to the panting woman who holds onto her side bending down trying to catch her breath. “Mum? Did you follow me?” Donghyuck asks, panicked as he moves towards her but doesn’t touch her. “Why did you follow me? You could’ve hurt yourself,” Donghyuck stresses.

“I was trying to talk to you, but you just ran away from me.” She breathes out still hunched and trying to catch her breath. “I wanted…to talk to you, let me catch my breath,”

Donghyuck meekly stands back and watches her. She’s got on a long dress that end by her ankles, it’s black and she has a white cardigan over her dress. Her grey hairs are neatly tucked in a low ponytail. It brings Donghyuck, some form of happiness, when seeing that her health was booming and despite being tired, that she had strength. His only form of happiness was seeing his mum being well. Without him in the picture and with Renjun being by her side she regained the health that he had taken away from her.

“I can’t come back to you mum,” Donghyuck finds himself saying. “I’ll only cause you stress, and you’ll lose weight again, and you’ll get sick again because of me, and i… I don’t want to be responsible for your unhappiness and misery. All I’ve ever wanted was for you to be okay…and now that you’re well, I need to find my own way…you don’t need me holding you down,”

These are words to her ears. Hearing her son being so vulnerable causes her to recall of a time when she cradled him in her arms when he was just a child. She vowed that no matter what, she would protect him. Little did she know that his own way of doing things, were for her and not out of selfish reasons. She limps forward and holds her hand out. “Are you hungry?” She asks calmly looking up to him who still had eyes for the ground. “We can talk after you’ve had a meal. Are you going to deny my request to spend time with you?”

Donghyuck visibly hesitates and gulps before shaking his head.

When his mother takes him to a causal diner serving pastry, Donghyuck’s eyes light up when seeing all the meals but his eyes don’t linger long on the food as he focuses on the table. He was so hungry, he only ate once a week during a Thursday when the shelter people would come, but otherwise he lived on water from public fountains.

“What would you like, I’ll pay for it,”

Looking at the menu, Donghyuck looked for the cheapest bun which was a doughnut. “T-the simple doughnut,”

“Are you sure?” His mum asks looking at the menu seeing that it’s the cheapest and most plain. “Come on son, don’t be afraid. I’ve got more than enough,”

Donghyuck chokes up on the word ‘son’ but still shakes his head. “I’m not that hungry though. It’s alright you can eat,”

“The son I knew loved eating,”

“I just don’t want to waste your money. You can use it on something else,”

“I want to use it on you,” She tries to ensure, but the look on Donghyuck’s face showed that was adamant. Even though he didn’t say anything, she could see right through his façade. Something surely changed in her son.

The afternoon he left her house, she couldn’t shake off the guilt she felt for letting him leave. Even though she had a piece of mind without him, it’s the mere fact that he came to her and she turned him away. As his mother, her soul still ached for her son.

“We’ll have the lunch brunch,” She says when the waiter returns. Donghyuck’s ears perk but he says nothing. He waits for his mum to speak, but his nerves get the better of him and he’s legs begin to shake by the heavy silence.

“The pastor told me, that he had seen you a couple of times wandering the streets,” She speaks when noting his anxiety. “He asked me, why I had neglected you.” That makes her pause to take in her son’s fragile and vulnerable state. He looked neglected and deprived of a mother’s love. “His words hit me straight in the heart because he reminded me of all the prayers I made for you. Prayers for you to change, to become my son again, prayers for God to help you find your way. His words, reminded me why I shouldn’t give up on you.”

Those are words to Donghyuck’s ears, they even make him turn red.

“We can start over,” She proposes. “We can put the past behind us, and try again. Are you willing to try again? To rekindle our relationship?”

Donghyuck feels his neck growing hot, but he still manages to clear his throat uttering out a tiny ‘Yeah’ but he’s even afraid of confessing the words out loud just in case it’ll jinx his luck.

“I’m happy to hear that,” She smiles warmly again leaning over the table trying not to push his nervousness. “A position recently opened up in the place where I work. They’re looking for a janitor and security guard, two wedged type of work. I know it doesn’t sound like much, but it’s a private kindergarten school and they pay very well. If you’re interested, I can arrange the necessary documents for you, and put in a good word for you. I’m well-respected in the school, so I believe that despite your record, I can put in a good word and it’ll be enough to cover your past,”

- 2 Weeks later.

Donghyuck picks up the heavy green plastic of trash consisting of used but not limited to dirty recyclable materials, and walks out the classroom and onto the hallway that would lead to the playground field where all the different sets of dumpsters would be. After dumping the trash inside and closing the lid he digs into his pocket to his buttoned phone to check the time.

15:29.

Thirty more minutes until he could knock off. Upon walking back to the classroom, his eyes squint into the playground distance to the empty entrance gate- well not so empty. What catches his eye, is some sort of homeless looking guy in dirty black sweatpants and a faded out red coca cola t-shirt with holes, walking towards a child sitting on a bench. Donghyuck sighs and walks towards the entrance. His whole presence alone causes the homeless guy to deviate and part away crossing the street. The vulnerable child isn't even aware that she's been spared from danger as she continues humping on the bench. Getting a bit sexual and seemingly trying to reach her pleasure.

Donghyuck scratches his neck wondering if he should be stopping the child or tell his mum once again. Even though they still weren't on good terms, he promised to be on his best behavior if it meant his mum helping him out. Getting out of prison with a warrant wasn't easy at all, but not as much as it was to get a job of any kind with so many prison charges. Thankfully, Donghyuck's mother came to his rescue. She worked as a day care teacher assistant and their school was in need of a cleaner. It wasn't a luxurious position, but Donghyuck took it just to prove to his mother that he was serious in mending their relationship.

So being a 'janitor' his main responsibilities included getting on the school grounds early, cleaning up classes when students were not inside, disposing of trash and waiting until the school day was over and all the kids went home to clean again. Those were his responsibilities, but it became tough when parents didn't pick up their kids on time at 13.00. Donghyuck hated when parents would fetch their kids late. Reason being, because he'd need to make sure that the school was 100% empty before him to go home. And if it was not 100% empty, then he wasn't allowed to go home.

Getting closer to the bench, Donghyuck notices the child seating down yet rocking her hips back and forth on the bench- almost grinding herself on it. The sight is perverse. However, for Donghyuck, he'd gotten used to only one of the day care students who was consistent in grinding on anything and everything when she was bored. Areum.

Making himself more visible to the young girl, Donghyuck sits on the bench next to her. Her motion stops and she peers to the elder sitting next to her, a bright smile coating her lips. "Hi Mr Sunshine!"

"Hey Kid." Donghyuck greets in a mumbling tone making the girl chuckle. “What?” He asks when looking down at her.

“I have a joke,”

“Go for it,” Donghyuck sighs, already knowing she’d bring another terrible pun joke. She loved doing that for some reason.

Areum giggles and looks up to Donghyuck. “A book fell on my head when I was in the library. I guess I only had myshelf to blame.” She begins giggling. “Did you hear the joke about the little mountain? It was hill-arious!”

“I’ve got one,” Donghyuck finds himself saying. “What do dogs do when they need a break while watching a movie?”

“What?”

“They put it on paws.” Donghyuck shakes his head smirking when the little girl begins dying of laughter. A little back and forth of her terrible puns fills the silent, but after some time she becomes silent. With his hands in his pocket and peering down at the girl who slowly continues to grind herself again, Donghyuck sighs. "Where's your parent?"

The child blinks causing Donghyuck to internally roll his eyes groaning lowly. This job really tested his patience especially when talking with kids.

"Where's the person who's going to fetch you? You mum or dad or guardian?"

"Oh! Mummy's at work." She says nodding her head. "Uncle Jung is going to fetch me."

Donghyuck nods his head allowing the silence to take over. However, his attention draws to the girl once again when she rocks her hips back and forth again. It's not the first time she's done this, however, every time that she does it, Donghyuck feels slightly uncomfortable. He's caught her on this bench all by herself on multiple occasions grinding for pleasure, not only the bench, but sometimes in class as well, on her chair. Donghyuck just wonders what exactly is going on in her head, while she literally dry humps the bench.

"Why are you doing that?" Areum peeks up and blinks her eyes. Donghyuck breathes out. Not wanting to say foreign words or words she's never heard before, he motions with himself and dry humps the bench similar to what she was doing. Areum catches on and smiles.

"It's a secret!" She leers. Despite her words, she seems excited to share the so called secret. And Donghyuck takes advantage of that, throwing his best cunning and charming personality.

"Can I know the secret?" Donghyuck asks with a pretense stunned face, being cunningly friendly. "I thought we're friends?"

"Okay." Areum looks around skeptically. "It's a secret." And laughs. "Uncle Jung said I should tell no one, even if its nice."

Donghyuck's brows furrow. "What's nice?"

Areum laughs covering her mouth frantically. In Donghyuck's head she looks the happiest while trying to be cryptic. She stands up and jumps up happily before her fingers begin to move. Donghyuck's eyes widen when she lifts up her white skirt revealing her yellow panty. He hesitates for a second until he realizes that her hand fumbles and makes its way inside her panty. He's quick to taking her hands out while having a morbidly shocked face.

She giggles, being way too excited. "Let me show you."

The secret? The secret has something to do with an uncle and a child? This only makes Donghyuck widely panic. "Fuck,"

"Oh oh." She covers her mouth in sudden surprise. "Do you also play fuck like Uncle Jung?" Before a smile latches onto her face. A chill runs down Donghyuck's spine. "Uncle Jung said fuck is a game. It's my favorite game." She whispers out.

His eyes widen. In all his years of being in prison, he sorta had the chance to reflect on where he'd like to be once he's out. And right now, talking to this girl feels dangerous. It's a problem. And this is not what he wants at all. If he tells his mum, there might be a high case of him being in a feud with the family of the young girl's parents. At the same time because the daycare already don't like him, he and his mum might both be fired from god knows what- Donghyuck is aware of how much they're waiting for him to slip up. But yet, he can't stop himself from asking. "Can you tell me more about his game? I don't know it."

"Don't tell anyone. Not even Mrs Chittaphon. Or mummy. Only Uncle Jung and I play this game," She nods her head and smile. "It's a nice game. I get to sit on him and ride the horsey!"

Donghyuck's eyes burst out of their sockets. Just as his lips become dry. He clears his throat asking. "Does he remove your clothes?"

She shakes her head. "No." She smiles. That sort of makes Donghyuck cool down again, however he's still in edge by the word horsey and what exactly she rides or what exactly has he shown her. "Can I show you?"

Donghyuck shakes his head with a tight smile, feeling bad for the little girl who seems brainwashed. "It's fine, I don't want to play the game today,"

"Uncle Jung likes to play it after work," Areum smiles. And that literally breaks Donghyuck's heart. Such a small, sweet and innocent little girl being manipulated by a ravaging uncle wolf.

"What does he do in the game?" Donghyuck asks after gaining her trust by sealing his lips shut with an invisible key.

"He tickles me here." Areum points to a part in her skirt and that makes Donghyuck mad. The urge to telling his mum growing. "And does like this," using her middle finger, she surprisingly rubs it on her yellow panty causing Donghyuck to quickly hold her hand.

"Your fucking uncle is raping you." He can't hold himself back when he glares into her eyes while shaking his head.

"My playing uncle is raping?" She asks with a puzzled face. "What's raping?"

Donghyuck sucks in a breath, and with distress he runs his hands through his hair. Before he turns back to Areum his eyes latch onto a black vehicle pulling up on the street. "Shit. Hey sweet cheeks, I need you to listen alright. Don't tell Uncle Jung that you told me, okay?"

She instantly nods his head. "I won't tell him. He'll be angry with me. Don't worry Mr Sunshine, it'll be our little secret."

The black vehicle parks right in front of them, with Donghyuck creating some distance while Areum can't stop giggling at her secret. A man, smartly dressed in a suit with parted hair, steps out the car with a charming smile growing on his lips when Areum jumps from the bench running to him. Donghyuck stands up with his hands stuffing in his pocket.

"Uncle Jung!" Areum cheers hugging him by his legs. Upon hearing the name, Donghyuck's eyes do a double take towards the man. The man squats all the way down with an antagonizing friendly smile, and puckers his lips allowing for Areum to kiss his lips before she giggles like the naive little girl she is. She begins jumping up and down in place while the man stands. "Did you buy the toys?"

"My little puppy, I bought you so many toys for you to enjoy. They're gonna make you feel real good ," Hearing the voice of the older male, his underlying tone of condescension and how much authority he has over the little girl, Donghyuck can't help it when his fists tighten into a ball. His jaw clinches when the male with a charismatic smile grins his way. "She wasn't a bother was she?"

Donghyuck's jaw locks and he looks away, only making Jaehyun continue as if he didn't get ignored.

"Either way, thanks for keeping her company. "

Placing Areum in the backseat and placing her bag in the boot, the man known as Uncle Jung gets into his driver's seat and begins driving away. Donghyuck can only stand with his fists balled up as he watches the car stride away. In his head, although the situation was sickening, he already told himself he wouldn't get involved. His mum's reputation, as well as his own reputation was on the line.

"Poor girl." Donghyuck sighs walking back in the school to lock it up.

•

"Jaehyun, thank you so much for looking after her," Yezi smiles giving her boyfriend, Jaehyun, a peck on his lips looking up into his eyes while picking up Areum from the floor and positioning her on her hip. "I hope she wasn't a bother,"

"She's never a bother to me," Jaehyun smiles placing his finger over his lip causing Areum to giggle hiding her face in her mother's neck.

"Did you have fun baby?" Yezi asks with a dashing smile making Areum cheerfully nod her head.

"Yes mummy! Uncle Jung and I played together!"

"Yes we did. She's so obedient," Jaehyun has a proud smile looking at the little girl in her mummy's arms, before he looks back to her mummy. "Are you sure you don't want her to spend the night with me while you're on your family dinner? I don't mind, it's Friday."

"I really wish I could leave her with you, but my sister's coming for the first time in such a long. She'd really love to see Areum,"

"That's alright, my darling," Jaehyun pets on Areum's head puckering his lips waiting for her to place her lips on him and she does.

At first for Yezi it used to be weird that Areum allowed for Jaehyun to do that when she was very conservative with people, but after some time and after getting used to it, she found it adorable how Areum opened up to Jaehyun in so many ways. "Have fun alright my little puppy,"

"Okay Uncle Jung," Areum grins and waves her hand. “Bye-bye uncle Jung,"

"Bye puppy,"

"Mummy is your sister really coming?" Areum asks with hopeful eyes, causing Yezi to frantically nod her head. "I can't wait to see her! I have a joke for her?”

“Let me hear it,” Yezi laughs slightly while walking.

“What do dogs do when they need a break while watching a movie? They put it on paws.” Areum begins laughing hard when her mum laughs as well.

“That’s a good one,”

“Mummy are you happy?" Areum asks.

Yezi laughs and places Areum down so they can hold hands and walk in the house. “I’m so so happy,”

•

18:50

"How do I look?" Jeno asks for the upteenth time, nervously adjusting his long sleeved shirt into his fine ironed black suit pants. He clears his throat testing out his voice with the syllable 'ah'. Dae, standing in front of him with her hands on his shoulders, peers into his wandering eyes waiting for him to relax. "How do I look? Do I look good?"

"You keep asking me the same question?" She lightly smiles, finding his whole nervous state funny.

"That's because you haven't answered me," Jeno inhales and exhales.

"Well, the first time I said you look good, the second time I said you look charming, and the third time I said you look handsome, the fourth time I said you look spot on, and for the tenth time, I said you look, just fine babe." Dae ends up holding onto his fidgeting hands, giving her best smile radiating joy as she leans in close and embraces her lips upon his. Jeno freezes, yet he meekly indulges into the kiss. After a minute, she parts from him. "Baby, relax. It’ll all be alright."

He takes in a deep breath holding onto Dae's waist as he closes his eyes. Taking in another breath, he tries to calm down his nerves. Feeling Dae's hands against his chest, he feels reassured that nothing will happen today, because she is with him. “You look beautiful as always, but tonight you look really happy. I’m happy that you’re sharing this happiness with me,”

After several years- specifically 3 years of them dating, and of them living together and encouraging each other- Dae's father had finally had a change of heart in wanting to see and reunite with his daughter again, and meet the man she chose to love.

Although it happened about 5 years ago, the sight was deeply plunged into Dae's father, Zhong Chenle's mind. It's something that made him feel guilty and responsible for his children’s sufferings. The works of his hands, enclosed and trapped his daughters inside of a hell hole. But as years progressed, and Yezi's child, Areum, grew, he found his stone cold hateful heart slowly melt. The little baby girl looked so much like Dae. Despite being a child of a rapist, she inherited features of the family. Chenle couldn't help but warm up to the little girl whenever she called him 'gwanpa'. With his heart melting by the innocence of the child, he slowly got the strength to look his daughter Yezi in the eye and talk to her. The first few days were tough, as she had been longing and praying for her dad to finally notice her, but eventually she took the same pace as him and slowly they rekindled their relationship of father and last born. And this evening, Chenle was ready to open up his heart again, for his eldest daughter Dae and her new...boyfriend.

The first born, the first daughter of his family, the daughter which always shared her worries and joy with utmost elevation to her father, his first love ever since his ex-wife walked out on him. He wanted to reconnect with her, and never let her go again- even though she chose the path that she was on, he wanted to stand by her and at least try to be in her life again.

So as the sun sets and Chungdae walks around the dining room table adjusting the utensils and making sure the table was set and ready to eat, Chenle buttons up his traditional outfit and fixes his hair in the mirror.

Areum bounces around the room playing with the little dog Daegul, and from time to time looks up to her grandfather. "Gwanpa?"

"Yes my little bean," Chenle responds carefully pressing his hands down his clothes.

"You look nice." Her smile enlightens on her face when he turns around with a smile and picks her up.

"What did I tell you about that word ‘nice’?”

Areum giggles and stands straight. “Nice is dead. Gwanpa you look smart, and rich!” She cheers causing Chenle to smirk with pride.

“Thank you, my little bean." He tickles her stomach. "You don’t look too bad yourself, you look like a royal queen going to a ball,"

"Thank you gwanpa! Gwanpa I have a joke I want to tell mummy’s sister." She circles her hands around her grandfather’s neck as he carries her outside his room and down the stairs.

“She can’t take jokes easily,” Chenle suppresses a laugh when remembering how bad his daughter’s jokes used to be.

After the whole incident that went down and his house burning up, he made arrangements and building construction started again before he instantly moved from the secluded area and settled into a stronghold of fortification that was suitable for his status- in other words, he moved far away into a house of more wealth and power. Just like his previous home, it was situated on a barricaded hill, however instead of it being guarded within a residential gate, he hired his own secretary to look over the massive barricaded land that enclosed his mansion.

So as Jeno and Dae are driving along the road following the GPS signal of the new address of the Zhong Chenle residence, Dae instantly feels little, very tiny when coming to see her father. All that her father was able to achieve in his life time, all his inheritance, fortune, wealthy, position, status, level, money, all of it belonged to only him. A great man, with great power and authority.

"You have reached your destination." The GPS lady says.

Both Jeno and Dae's eyes are enlarged, dazzled and awestruck by the large high-end white concrete border building. "T-this is the house?" Jeno meekly asks. "Fuck me. We literally drove parallel to this wall and you're telling me, that this is the place?"

"There's the gate there," Dae notices the gate a distance away.

Jeno starts his little polished wagon and drives forward to the black high gates. He washed his car and polished it so many times, and even took it to the car wash and had it washed more than 5 times, all so that he could impress Dae's father and have him see himself as a suitable partner of his daughter. But now driving with his red wagon towards the gate, he feels worthless and poor all over again. Who did he think he had become? Just because he loved a rich girl and a rich girl loved him back- didn't make him rich all of a sudden. He was still a poor boy from nowhere.

Dae, seeing the distraught and down casted look shadow on Jeno's face, sets her hand on his thigh that nervously bounced up and down. He takes in a deep breath and presses his lips together when reaching the gate. The gate is completely black and doesn't give any view of what's inside.

Looking at the white wall that has a little black tinted window view, Jeno rolls down his window and awaits for the tinted window to open up. He sticks out his hand and presses on the little poll that had a little intercom.

"Hello?"

No response. Upon waiting for a response Jeno turns to Dae after a while. "Should I knock on the window?"

"No, wait, let me try and send my sister a message and see what we should do," Dae says, bringing out her phone and texts Yezi for the first time in 5 years, stating that she's outside. Yezi responds in a heartbeat making Dae feel much more relieved about there being no hard feelings between her and her family. No longer feeling awkward for being outside for more than 5 minutes. "Yezi says we should tell him our names and that we were invited by Mr Zhong."

"Alright," Jeno nods his head and takes a deep breath. "I suddenly don't feel like wanting to see your family,"

"Me too," Dae replies honestly chuckling lightly.

Living with Jeno, in his world, has really casted some kind of spell on her. From recovering from her overdose and intake of drugs, to being thankful for the hospitality she received from Jeno… the beauty of enjoying life at the expense of very little, is something she grew into. For so long, being away from a prestigious lifestyle, she got to appreciate and adore the simplicity of everything (even though she really had to adjust to many things, she enjoyed the simpler life). "I feel so small,"

Jeno opens up his palm looking into Dae's eyes with assurance. Dae places her tiny hand in his and he lightly squeezes it. They sit silently simply looking at the daunting gates of riches in which resides Dae's family.

"You know," Jeno gently speaks. "On that night, the night Mark, Haechan, Renjun and I invaded your house, we were actually sitting outside, in the car. We came when the sun was slightly still in the sky. We sat outside and watched your house as the sunset over it..."

Dae listens. To think that of all people to save her, Jeno would be the one who helped her escape a deadly fate only made her appreciate the good that was hidden in the rough. As much as she'd like to forget that horrible incident, she knew just how much more guilt Jeno felt every time he brought it up. It still kept him up, and as much as you wanted to heal from the night, Jeno as well wanted to heal from everything he had done that night. And it’s in moments like these when he speaks, you listen and allow him his moment to reflect, just as he allowed you to freely use him as much as you wanted so that you could heal. As he speaks, even though Dae has told him countless of times that she forgives him, Dae knows that every ounce of him wants to move on and feel forgiven. So she quietly sits, and listens. If he was going to forgive himself, she needed to always listen.

"The house, your house...was everything my brother and I always wanted. It was a palace, a fortress, four stories high, huge balconies, large veranda and just so homely. It was modern and even the air itself was something I'd never breathed in before. It was a home we've never had before." Jeno acknowledges. "I just wanted to see how it looked inside. I really wanted to know how the inside of a rich house looked like." Dae turns her head to him, when feeling his eyes on her. She moves between his left and right eye and he smiles. "You left a house that had more than 5 massive rooms, 2 spaciously large bathrooms and enormous backyards to literally cramp up with me in a one-bedroom apartment?"

"Spaciously is not a word and yes," Dae smiles lightly. "I left it all because it was all just material,"

Dae softly says smiling when Jeno leans closer and plants a kiss on her forehead. "Do you want something like this? Do you want materials again? Because I am promise you that I'll-"

"I only want you Jeno," She smiles when whispering softly. "I need you more than anything to survive in this world that was cruel to me. You're my home, and I really mean that. No materials on his earth can replace a soul that saved another soul,"

This time their breathing is in sync when they both embrace in a warm kiss, breathing in and out together allowing this moment to settle in. With their hands still clasped together as Jeno looks out his window to tell the guard who they are he’s stunned when the black metallic gates crank open in a slow manner and Jeno's head snaps to Dae who has her eyes on the road ahead. The gate is wide open with another path to follow, but Dae and Jeno are still in shock.

Jeno turns his head when a voice comes from the intercom. "Please move your vehicle inside the premises, Miss Yezi is waiting by the house."

“Miss Yezi?” Dae has a playful smile on her face. “Wow. I bet you she’s been treated like a princess,”

Jeno snickers while slowly driving his car past the gate and into the premises. The first thing that the couple takes note of, are the lights that are shining down on the pathway. Jeno and Dae's eyes are widely opened and are all over the large sets of trees that enclose the drive way- the long drive way with various gardened plants and flowers. It's absolutely breath taking watching the garden bloom with so much colors of wealth prosperity. In between the curvy path on the driveway, Dae's eyes look out by Jeno's side of his window to the slight view of the mansion that they were soon gonna get inside of.

Finally driving into one straight path, their view gets sidetrack by the large fountain statue of two angles pouring out water. Not only the fountain, but after passing another set of black gates that are already opened and rounding their car past the fountain, the lavish sight of the ever green garden with white little flowers enclose the garden really making the mansion seem like a heavenly fortress.

The houses theme is white. There are high pillars towards the front entrance of the house as well as arched pillars on each side that lead to different roads. Behind the pillars stand 3 large structures of the fortified mansion. The middle portion is the largest with a high double deck structure where all the windows are top to ceiling and are covered with gossamer curtains. The side building structures that are still connected to the middle portion are identical in terms of design and the layers of floors.

Stopping the car right by the side of the path, Jeno's mouth hangs open, not closing at the slightest. "At this point, your dad is trying to show off,"

"You don't say," Dae is marveled by the sight, that she doesn't notice her sister who walks down the lit up stairs heading towards their car.

Yezi's eyebrows furrow when neither of the people in the car get out. She stands there for a bit before walking towards the passenger’s door and knocking twice on the window- knocking both Jeno and Dae back to their senses.

Dae removes the seatbelt and laughs lightly. "This is it,"

"This is it," Jeno nervously says. "Best of luck to us,"

"We need that," Dae leans close to her boyfriend placing a light peck on his lips before opening up her door.

"Finally." Yezi states with a snickering laugh and a smile that eagerly begins to grow. "What was taking you guys so long? After I sent the message and you didn't come right in, I had to check with the gateman and he said the car was just there. But of course knowing you and your ever stubborn behavior, I knew you wouldn't tell the gateman anything,"

"Why should I? I'm my father's daughter, I don't need to introduce myself as a guest," Dae jokes being happy to see her sister. The tears sit on the brim of her eyes, and just like Yezi they instantly embrace each other in a tight hug. Yezi whimpers and holds even tighter.

“Dae,” She sniffs and can’t stop the tears from pouring out. “You look so good, I’m so happy toyou’re your beautiful eyebrows and hair being a beautiful black,” This only makes Dae laugh.

“Don’t remind me of those times,” Dae can’t stop laughing when hugging her sister. “Seeing you, seeing this house, dad outdid himself this time in making me feel bad,"

"Oh please, don't fuel up his ego," Yezi chortles shaking her head but still holding tightly onto Dae with her eyes closed. "He barely leaves the house now,"

Dae laughs at that patting Yezi's back. "Your poor freedom is gone,"

"Oh please, I can leave the house whenever I want," Yezi jokes out laughing with Dae. "I just need to take a bodyguard with me,"

"Bodyguard?" Dae's eyes widen and leans her head back still enclosing her sister in the hug. "Fuck, things have changed,"

"Language." Yezi's eyes widen. "We now refrain from cursing, I don't want my little girl latching onto that stuff,"

"Ncawww, Areum, right?" Dae squeals getting into the hug again as they both scream like little kids. "I can't believe I finally get to see her,"

"Dae! You have no idea how much I've missed this, missed us,"

Dae leans her head back with loving eyes looking into her sister’s teary eyes. "Don't cry bitch, if you cry you know my tears will flow out as well,"

"I know, but I can't help it," Yezi chuckles before sneakily landing a kiss over her sister’s lips. Dae is stunned for a whole minute before laughing out and squeezing Yezi into a greater hug again. After a minute of laughing and saying out their 'I love you', they finally part and Yezi's eyes go down her sister’s attire. "Oh my soul you don’t know how amazed I am by your eyebrows and your hair, and your body and your health! You look nourished and healthy and soo soo good! My sister is finally back!"

Complementing Dae's healthy figure, her black hair in curly waves tucked behind her ear to show off her twinkling earrings, stunning legs in a white tight dress that ends mid-thigh, matched together with a black long sleeved turtle neck inside, white daring heels and finally a tiny white purse.

Dae's hand goes down her dress and she models for Yezi with a joking tone. "I know, I know, I tried," Dae laughs acknowledging her sister and nodding her head. Jeno can only stand by his car smiling at how gorgeous Dae looks. This was the Dae that he always admired, and now that she recovered she looked as stunning as ever.

"I'm not even one to look at, you're wearing designer? Vera Wang?" Dae's eyes marvel at the designer black sleeveless dress that showed off her toned arms and a bit of her belly. And finally the black see-through flowing skirt that has a little tight black skirt inside and is long yet has a long slit up to her thigh.

Yezi also playfully models out and flips her hair. "I knew my sister was coming today, so I had to dress to impress," Yezi laughs.

“You killed it!” Dae encourages with sass making Yezi laugh.

“No you killed it!”

“I just wish I was somebody else to admire how we both killed it,” Dae flips her hair dramatically before Yezi holds onto her sister’s hand and leading her forward.

"Wait till you-"

Dae grips onto Yezi's hand tightly before motioning back to Jeno who is calmly standing like a doorman. When noticing the eyes of the girls on him, he quickly bows his head nervously, making Dae smile brightly. “My person here inspired me to kill it. Come on Jen baby,” Dae marvels and walks to him bravely intertwining their hands. “This is my sister, Yezi,”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you Yezi,” Jeno bows again maintaining a positive smile.

"Oh, hi," Yezi's tone simmers down but she tries to maintain the forced fake smile on her face. While Chenle was ready to give Jeno a chance, Yezi wasn't too fond of allowing her sister to be with a lowlife and someone who was involved in keeping them hostage. But aside that, she bows her head as well. "Wow you guys are matching." She takes in the view of Jeno's elegant face that comes out dashingly with his styled and parted hair that gives off a sense of superiority. His style of clothing consists of a white buttoned down long sleeved shirt and black suit pants with his polished dress shoes, and Yezi notes how he's standing and how humble he looks. He can try to look like them as much as he wants, but Yezi still had bitter feelings. "Well, welcome. Come on in," She smiles and stretches her hand out to the stairs leading to the mansion and eventually the people inside, that are awaiting them.

Dae stands close to Jeno, abandoning Yezi's hand to securely wrap it around Jeno's bicep. "Babe, you've got this. Just relax okay,"

When dressing up for the occasion, he thought he went overboard with the dress pants as he never wore suits too much- but seeing how Dae followed his lead and decided to dress up as well, he praises the heavens that they didn't second guess their outfit. What would've happened if they dressed in normal clothes?

Climbing up the lit up stairs together, Jeno and Dae are finally in front of the door.

The double doors are wide open and upon entering into the new ambiance of the home and removing their shoes, replacing them with the white slippers available, Jeno rubs his sweaty hands over his black pants and swallows a clump of saliva in his throat to give it some moisture. He felt like he was going to die, by the pace his heart was beating.

"Babe, you've got this," Dae encourages and holds onto the sides of his face massaging his neck. Jeno nods his head, suddenly feeling selfish. Here Dae was, giving him some air and encouragement, even though she's the one who walked out on her family and was also seeing them for the first time after years.

"You too," He holds onto her hands on his neck and smiles lightly.

Yezi watches from afar, seeing how strangely, adorable they both looked. Her sister, who she never thought could fall in love with someone who had no money, is suddenly looking up into the eyes of her lover with so much care. And the lover, Jeno, who Yezi once thought was just a sick criminal, looks like a little cute boy under the embrace of his mother. Even though she doesn't say it, and refuses to acknowledge it, deep down, they look happy and peaceful together.

Walking over to Yezi with their hands together, Yezi leads them in the house and Jeno has to keep himself from ogling at the house for too long. After passing a long corridor and walking into the entrance of the living room, Jeno's heart stops beating.

In the living room, Chenle and Chungdae stand side by side, with little Areum clinging to her grandmother's hand. When entering the living room, the first face that lights up instantly is Chungdae when seeing her gracious step-daughter who she loved the most. Her teeth are bright and so inviting that Jeno feels at peace when seeing a friendly face. Chenle on the other hand looks composed and modest- but his face morphs into shock when both Jeno and Dae get on their knees and bow down completely with their heads touching the floor.

He and Chungdae share eyes of surprise. Chenle tries not to laugh maintaining a sincere face again, just as Chungdae speaks up. "Oh, much appreciated," She says as Jeno stands and helps Dae up on her feet. The loving eyes from Chungdae and the warm smile, makes Dae want to cry by how familiar her mother's face was.

"Hi mum," Her own smile brightens up her face as she bows again, this time her head lowers slightly. Her mother is dressed in an elegant traditional styled hambok, and Dae's afraid to wrinkle or mess the dress, but when Chungdae steps forward with loving open arms and embraces Dae- Dae's can't help but wrap her arms tightly around her mother's frame "Mum," she lightly cries, laughing a little when her mother kisses her ear.

"My sweet," Breaking up the hug, Chungdae squeezes Dae's cheek and let's her go before looking to Jeno.

Jeno awaits for the smile to wither from her face, but is surprised when it's still there. "Good afternoon madam," Jeno bows down in a 90-degree angle, thinking that when he looks up her smile would've disappeared, however, when it's still on her face, he's completely stunned.

"Welcome," Chungdae bows her head as well patting his shoulder. "And you can call me, Mrs Chungdae, you're welcome here. It's good to finally see the both of you,"

Chungdae steps back and turns to Chenle. Dae and Jeno fix their positions to look at Chenle. Dae is hesitant, when looking into her dad's eyes, but regardless still tries to do so. Her smile is shaking and all she feels like doing is crying. The last time she saw her dad, a lot of harsh words were exchanged- she was not even in the right state of mind for most of those times. Her smile is rocky and her eyes blur up with tears that she can't even look at her father anymore, she hangs her head in shame. Jeno from the side, feels his heart wear down when watching her silently break down in front of her dad. He breaths in and gently slides his fingers in her hand before squeezing it, for comfort and strength.

He then turns to Chenle, who still has his somber eyes on his daughter. "Good afternoon sir. Thank you for your invitation. For allowing your daughter to bring me here." Jeno bows down in a 90-degree angle humbling himself completely. Dae follows as well, bowing down with her eyes closed to maintain herself. Standing up straight again, Dae clears her throat.

"Hi dad. Thank you..." She softly speaks and her voice shakes again not being able to meet his eyes and thus bows down again- and Jeno willingly follows. "Thank you for your invitation. And I'm so sorry for everything I've done. Please can you forgive me, for all the words I’ve said, the stress I caused you and mum, the hate I spread in the house, please forgive me dad. I truly apologize for all that I’ve done, and I beg you to forgive. I said a lot of things to hurt you, but I didn’t mean any of them and I’m sorry for how I left. I’m sorry dad."

"My daughter," Chenle meekly raises his hand laying it on his daughter's head. Feeling his hand on her head, she squeezes her eyes shut to not break down again. Chenle's face is holding back so much on emotions, but it slips out when he feels the head of his daughter. "I forgive you, please don't cry. You know I don't like it when I see you cry,"

"Thank you, for this invitation," Dae stands up straight again with a smile on her face and her eyes still watery. Chenle's hand retreats but he’s taken aback by the wave of emotions that pass over him when Dae engulfs him in a hug so dear and deep. Chenle can’t resist and sets his arms over her shoulders in protection like he had always done. Finally, his daughter has returned.

Smiling when feeling her dad’s arms around, she nuzzle’s her head a little more on his chest, before she separates from him and bows her head down again. Chenle’s face is glowing with pride and excitement and he turns to Jeno who also stands straight. Chenle bows his head quietly acknowledging Jeno.

"My name is Zhong Chenle, you can call me Mr Zhong." Chenle addresses Jeno in a fluid tone, with no harshness or strictness, simple and calm. "What's your name?"

Jeno bows lightly. "Thank you Mr Zhong. My name is Lee Jeno,"

The name makes Chenle tense but he nods his head. If his daughter chose him, then he’d need to get down to the bottom of it and see why. It was up to Chenle to see how serious they were. "It's a pleasure to meet you Lee Jeno," Chenle greets and turns his head to the side, down to the little girl who just looked up with an erratic smile. "This little bean right here is Zhong Areum,"

Chenle introduces them to Yezi's daughter, making Yezi smile. Ever since Areum was born, Chenle refused for the baby to have his surname. So seeing the love traverse from him to her daughter, a flow of content joy washes over her.

"Hi mummy’s sister!" Areum chirpily greets, brightly before shyly leaning on her grandfather when Dae puffs her cheeks in delight. Chenle picks her up patting her back telling her to carry on. She waves her hand to both Jeno and Dae who wave back with big smiles.

"Areum, this is Dae, your aunty," Chenle speaks in a soft cradling voice making Chungdae laugh. "And this is Mr Lee, your aunty friend,"

Jeno doesn’t feel any jab from Chenle referring to him as a friend, but Dae does. She was hoping that her dad wouldn’t diminish Jeno into that position.

"Areum what do we do when we greet people?" Chungdae questions calmly watching Areum.

"Gwanpa, can you put me down, so I can greet?" Areum asks cutely with big eyes. Chenle sets her down patting her head.

"Of course, my little bean,"

Areum places both her hands over her stomach and dress and bows down. "Hello Miss Dae and Mr..." she quickly looks up and looks to her grandfather.

"Mr Jeno," He assists patting her head again as she returns to bowing.

"Hello Mrs Dae and Mr Jeno." She finishes her bow and does a little curtsey with her dress gaining an applaud from Chungdae, Yezi and Dae- automatically making Jeno clap his hands. In his head all he can think of is how she looks like Dae…but as a little girl. “I have a funny joke, what does a clock do when it's hungry?”

“What?” Dae smiles.

“It goes back four seconds?” Jeno asks but gets surprised when Areum begins laughing and giggling suggesting that it’s correct. That makes the family clap again, making Jeno shake his head with a little smile on his face. Chenle coo's in a baby voice.

"Aigoo, my little bean sprout is all grown up," He picks her up again with a dashing smile, before turning to Jeno and Dae. "Make yourselves comfortable, you can follow me to the dining room,"

Jeno turns to Dae squeezing her hand tighter. His nerves were still high, but upon the warm welcome and the tension sliding down because of the little baby girl, Jeno feels slightly relaxed. "This is it,"

Dae nods her head, following behind Chungdae and Yezi, who follow behind Chenle who is still carrying Areum and whispering into her grandfather's ears. "Gwanpa, is that really really mummy's sister?"

Chenle nods his head with a smile. "Yes, she’s your mummy's sister,”

"Gwanpa, if I’m a queen would that make her a princess? I wanna make her a queen because she looks nice- beautiful,” Areum corrects herself before charmingly complimenting Dae. “Why does she look beautiful?”

"Because she's my daughter," Chenle cackles a little, he never got tired of the endless questions that left her mouth or how much of a chatterbox she was. It's moments like these, where he hopes that his little granddaughter, didn't inherit any bad or foul manners from the savage rapist. She was such a passionate young and vibrant soul that Chenle easily found intriguing and alluring.

“Gwanpa, Mr Jeno looks like a prince, I think he likes her a lot and wants to become a King,”

"You should ask him if he wants to be a king," he pats her nose still answering to her questions, meanwhile thinking of all the questions he wanted to ask Jeno.

"Do you think daddy will go hard on Dae and him?" Yezi asks calmly to her mother.

"Let's hope not," Chungdae replies. "I feel like he might want to embarrass him a bit. He kept talking about that nonstop all through the night, but he did also mention how he wants to reunite with Dae again,"

Yezi groans. "Fingers crossed, it doesn't get awkward."

Meanwhile Jeno holds onto Dae's hand like he's on life support. Dae wraps her fingers tightly against his as well. "No matter how intense it gets, just answer honestly. My dad will try everything he can to belittle you, but remember what I said back in the house, don't let him break your spirit, he hasn't walked a mile in your shoes, so don't mind if he doesn't understand." She says, words that always made Jeno feel more drawn to her.

The dining room is large, and has an extremely large round circular table, with various of decorations and platters of food on a rotating stand. Areum waves her hand to her mum as one of the servants walks away with her. Jeno and Dae, wait for the family members to take a seat before finding themselves next to each other and sitting. Chenle acknowledges that and is impressed.

Dae smiles secretly, knowing that her dad loved order and discipline. And if Jeno could at least show that he was capable and worthy to dine with him, then Chenle would ease up a bit on him. He simply wanted to see how well-mannered the boy was, since he was groomed by misfortune, Chenle wanted to test out how well he could be for his daughter.

Yezi is seated on the right of her father, while Chungdae is seated on the left of her husband and Jeno and Dae sit next to each other- being in Chenle's direct eyes vision. "Shall we eat?" Chenle asks and they all take in their utensils ready to feast.

As the rounding table makes the rounds and the servants walk around the table adding little side dishes here and there, Jeno feels much more overwhelmed then starved. From the many utensils on the table, to the little plates the servants put with tiny looking leaves, Jeno places his hand underneath the table lightly placing it over Dae's leg.

She turns her head to him, seeing him panic. Calmly she leans in and begins explaining that he can eat whatever, which plates he has to put the food in and which plates he dumbs the bones and what's not. Her whispered words of encouragement don't go unnoticed by anyone at the table, especially Chenle who picks up his chopsticks and watches the pair while he eats. Much to his distaste Jeno snickers and Dae does so as well- he ignores it and clears his throat gaining their attention.

"Dae," Chenle starts.

Chungdae nervously turns to Chenle. His first target. Dae looks up and adjusts her sitting position before smiling. "Yes, dad,"

For some reason, Chenle's heart feels a little touched when hearing her say the word dad. It's been a while, a really long while. “It’s wonderful seeing you in strong health. For how long have you been clean?”

Dae clears her throat with a little smile. “2 years now.”

“Rehab or self-rehabilitation?”

Dae answers honestly. “Self-rehabilitation. Actually, the night I left home and went clubbing, I was hit by a car,” This causes all of them to look at her in worry. “I, uh. I broke some ribs and nearly lost my life because I barely had enough blood in my body. A blood transfusion was done, and when I woke up… I felt as though, a second chance of life has been given to me,”

Chenle’s heart aches hearing the story. “Why didn’t you come home after that?”

Dae briefly looks to Jeno, who offers a somber smile before rubbing her thigh. “I didn’t want to live my life like before. I felt trapped, and it wasn’t because of you,” Dae immediately clears up, holding onto Jeno’s hand. “I just, wanted to live alone for a bit.”

“A bit turned into years,” Chungdae speaks sadly but a smile regains on her face. “May I ask you this, this blood transfusion you did that saved your life, was it the young man’s blood?”

Dae nods her head with a smile. “He’s the one who helped me that night. Paid the bills, gave me blood, offered me a place to stay, he was always by my side,”

The warm tone settles upon Chungdae seeing her child look so bright and happy. “Well thank you Mr Lee for that. Otherwise, we wouldn’t have been able to see our beautiful girl.” Chungdae smiles. “Pleae enjoy the food,”

Once again, everyone begins eating in a calm atmosphere. Jeno has never eaten so slow, as well as tiny bites in his whole life, however seeing everyone eat in a slow and paced manner, Jeno adjusts himself. This doesn’t go unnoticed by Dae as she snickers here and there covering it with a little cough.

Subsiding his friendly character, Chenle has his eyes on Dae who constantly looks to Jeno. "Dae,”

“Yes?” She instantly looks away from Jeno and to her dad feeling caught. She gulps, just as Chenle prepares himself.

“I’ve tried deviating from my culture merely because I didn’t want my daughters to be bounded by tradition. I’ve given you a good life, good education and have paved a way for a future that you can maintain. The family business of architecture as well as our lifestyle, you left it all for your own self satisfying pleasure because you felt ‘trapped’. I’m assuming you have a lot to showcase for your disobedience. Have you made a name for yourself by walking over our tradition?" The question alone brings Jeno into a front line of defense. Even though Chenle was her dad, Jeno wouldn't allow her dad to walk over how hard she had worked to get to where she was now. She worked extremely hard and Jeno was ready to defend. Unconsciously. However, Chenle unaware of the set eyes on him, continues on. "How's that going? What do you do?"

Dae feels heavy by the sharp arrow that was aimed for her heart by his words. “First of all, I am grateful for all the opportunities I was able to get while being here. Second of all, I never intended to disobey you dad. But I needed to do it for a clear mindset in what I wanted to do, in where my heart felt good. And lastly, I'm a Junior Editor."

"Editor? Junior?" Chenle poses in disbelief. "That's in the writing field. Meaning you don't get paid much, as for junior, you probably don't do much. What do you write about?"

Dae breaths in and nods her head looking up to her father. "I write articles on and for the youths of today and the struggles they face."

"That's like freelancing work." Chenle sighs out trying not to make it a big deal, but he's disappointed. His daughter. His first daughter scrapping by. He glances at Jeno. "And you Mr Lee. What do you do?" Chenle slurps on the fresh vegetable in a bowl, looking already bored.

"Photography."

"Wow, another freelancer." Chenle sounds dishonored much more then disappointed, and he continues to eat his dish of food. Yezi savagely tries to hold in her laugh replacing it with a cough and quickly looking down when Chungdae shoots her a glare. The couple of Dae and Jeno briefly glance to each other in hesitancy, but regardless they eat.

Just as Chenle is about to say something else, Dae along with everybody else get surprised by Jeno's voice. "You know Mr Zhong, not to be rude, and I say this with 'respect'-" only Dae catches on to his mocking tone, and gets worried for him. "Since you brought up your culture and tradition, according to the Zhong's line of history as well as your own private company's humble beginnings, small beginnings was were you started. So pardon me if this comes out rude, but truly I don't think you've got any right to be pissed off, you also left your family to please your own self satisfying pleasure-"

Dae's eyes widen and she places her hand over his thigh. "Jeno-"

But nonetheless Jeno still continues to speak. "To be pissed off at her career would mean neglecting her small beginnings. I don’t know much about your family, but what I do know is that your family’s legacy only grew into millions of because of you. What if Dae’s small beginnings allow her to reach your peak-"

"Comparing my family's legacy and personal company with Dae's quote on quote small beginnings sounds radically obscure. Do you even know who I am? My small beginnings lasted within a year, and I've been making millions ever since. Dae's small beginnings are small beginnings on a scale of failure," Chenle starts while setting his dish down, taking the next set of food while Chungdae grumpily adds some soup for him. She didn't like how his words sounded too harsh. Meanwhile Yezi has wide eyes glancing with a shocked face at her dad and then Jeno. “So tell me Mr Lee-”

Jeno breaths out, feeling Dae sinking in shame when she looks at her food and quietly eats. "You're talking about me as if I'm not here," She mumbles. “And my small beginnings aren’t on a scale of failure, you don’t know how hard I work-”

"Your lover is the one who started with the comparisons and small beginnings. You want to be mad at the truth? Suck it up and continue to embark on your sma-"

"Honey." Chungdae warns looking at him.

Chenle sighs. He nods his head whilst eating as if he's not having the conversation. "Do you believe that she'll make it big in her field Mr Lee?"

"I believe in her."

"I didn't ask if you believe in her. Because I also believe in her. And I much more believe she has a brighter career elsewhere, but what's important now is do you believe that she'll make it big in her field?"

"Yes-"

"Dae who never ever pays attention to the news, the same girl who barely gives an ear to those less 'fortunate' then her? My daughter? That same daughter who would never be interested in anything if it wasn't about her? The same daughter who got involved in hardcore drugs- that same girl caring for people seems unusual. A journalist? On top of that a youth journalist? Youth? Smart mouths with foul brains, those youth? Those same youth? Maybe she gives you a speck of patience, but I know my daughter. Does she really love what she does or is it just some passing want from feeling trapped? Does she have tolerance and patience for others? For you? My daughter wants to do journalism? That doesn't make sense to me," Chenle states out nonchalantly yet sternly. "I've seen her writing. And although phenomenal, she'd need a spark of light in her to empathize with youths. Regardless of what you say, I know my daughter much more then you. I know she's merciful, but in the field of journalism, it'll be used against her. With her temper, she'll easily get frustrated and allow for anyone to walk over her. I can't see, or even bare my daughter within a career where she constantly has to fight,"

Dae's stunned by his words. Never ever had he ever told her why he refused for her to be a journalist, he simply had a strong distaste towards any career that had a lack of funds. "Dream crusher much dad?" Dae chuckles sadly to cover up the pain.

"Dae, are those even dreams? To waste yourself away behind a screen writing for others? Dae. I'm…” Chenle refrains from using the words disappointed, but he’s already hinting at it. “I’m trying to understand. Why- why, why a journalist?"

Dae looks up to her dad in disbelief. "Because I’m a spoilt rich girl who’s gone through an experience that fucking changed my life forever. I left a house of riches to dwell in a place where it’s dark with no light. Why a journalist? Because in that dark dwelling place, I fucking saw a light and I wanted to fucking empathize-"

"Language Dae." Chungdae softly peeps being uncomfortable by all the slurs.

Dae stops and takes a deep breath. "I'm doing this because it gives my heart peace knowing that no one, especially a youth has to feel like they’re alone and that their futures are jokes. I’m saying the truth of my life to reach people in dark-"

"Truth?" Chenle scoffs. "In the world we live in? Truth and people don't go together, because this world loves to be blinded. It’s why the rich are rich and the poor are poor, those who have eyes don’t help those who can’t see. Today a journalist would rather break an untrue story and say an apology later, they could break thousands of hearts, but one apology and everyone forgets. You're telling me you haven't seen those cases?"

"I've noticed that lately."

"You can spend years putting together a story to help someone see the light, only for some toddler with a social media account to just tweet it out, with low grammatical words. As for professional objectivity, try maintaining that while competing against teens dancing at the news, or on TikTok and what not, and in the rare case let's say you do get a real story, you will be backlashed because all you did was your job. The truth hurts and rubs on people the wrong way."

"So what are you saying dad?" She asks seriously trying not to be discouraged. Jeno, places his hand on Dae's thigh, running his hand up and down as a way to calm her down.

"I'm saying." Chenle stops setting up his bowl to look at his daughter. "As my daughter, it's really my desire that if there is anything else you see yourself doing, do that instead." Chenle ends the discussion without much say, getting his next bowl. "You’re smart and if you want people to see the light, use your intelligence to-”

"Mr Zhong, I really do apologize if I'm being rude," Jeno interrupts not being able to be calm anymore, especially after noticing Dae's sagged shoulders. Truly Mr Zhong was a businessman with ideals and head on strong facts. However, that could never beat how much effort and change that Dae has put in. Which is why, Jeno with resilient courage speaks up for Dae. "I hate to break it to you, but the Dae that left your house years ago, isn't the Dae sitting in front of you. Her intelligence has changed and she’s adapted to street smarts too. I agree that Journalism isn't possibly the career that you invasion your daughter in, but she's similar to you in many ways. You started out with a master’s degree in Research, you left Research to join your family’s legacies of Doctors, before leaving it all together and had to dump it all including your family to finding out what you really wanted to do. But I digress, how can you put her down when I read that you even went as low as being a brick man and laying bricks for a living? You eventually decided you wanted a career in construction. Humble beginnings should never be neglected. If you didn't disqualify yourself, why discourage her, your own daughter? And if you're talking about money, then let me I’ll say it now, she makes money more than me-"

"Are you giving me street psychology now?"

Jeno breaths in deeply smirking a little when seeing a challenging look in her father’s eyes. "Street psychology makes you learn lessons the hard and painful way. Being rock bottom teaches you of success that being rich can’t. I've been with her ever since she left your home, so I know what I'm talking about when I say she's had a fall from your grace. But look at her now," Jeno turns to her, throwing a little smile and lightly patting her cheek (causing Dae to smile a little) before turning to Chenle, who even stopped eating to firmly be attentive to Jeno after publicly displaying such a manner. "I too, worry about the giant dumpster fire of twiddling toddler's, but I also don't care about that and I know she doesn't care about that. She writes for a living you know, she's always been writing and has tweaked her personalities here and there to adapt to the life that she's wanted. And if she can write a piece that has touched an orphaned boy's heart and stopped him from spiraling down into a dark path of drugs, then I know and have the belief that she's broken through the noise you’re projecting. I don't know why she isn't saying it now, but she always says, she wants to make a difference in all the ways that she can. That’s a fucking huge commitment if you ask me. And I'm not trying to take your place or anything like that, but even if she does fails in her projects, I’m here for you no matter how many times. You haven't been there for her, so you don't have that right to criticize or be disappointed in her achievements so far. I’m saying all this respectfully. I don't mean to sound rude or come of impolite, but the truth is the truth, and it can rub you the wrong way, so swallow it like a bitter pill."

“Well said, you’re the one living with her.”

Dae has a warm look in her eyes when looking to Jeno, her boyfriend, her choice, her messed up but one of the many right choices. How passionate he's been in defending her, whether it was to someone he never knew or someone she knew, and not allowing anyone, not even her dad, to walk over her. He's made it clear, time and time and time again, how he won't let anybody ever talk down on her or disrespect her. And its kind of alarming for Dae that Jeno just said all that while being ‘respectful’.

It's tensely silent with Chenle paying mind to his food instead, Chungdae and Yezi holding in their breaths, Dae smiling while eating on her meet- and Jeno returning back to his senses and freaking out. "Fuck." He mumbles, but instantly feels Dae's hand on his thigh. He turns his head seeing her reassuring smile. She mouths out a sweet thank you. It's enough to subside his irrational thoughts and focus on how calm she is.

Chungdae smiles when noticing the adoring look in Dae's eyes. Chungdae faces Chenle and picks up another bowl of rice before placing it before him. He looks to her, still eating his own bowl of meat and soup, and as if being summoned by the rice Chungdae lightly grins, and nudges her head towards Jeno and Dae. Chenle takes a look for himself, his eyes catching a sight too traumatic and so heartbreaking.

Dae looking at Jeno, the same way she used to look at him as a child. As a father, his child will always be his child. No matter how irrational, no matter how unclear, no matter how confusing she might be, even when she's falling in love with a foe, she's still his daughter. His first daughter. His first love whom he loves with all his heart. He doesn't know what's the name of the emotion that covers his whole heart when seeing Jeno, an unknown peasant briefly gazing at his precious daughter with stars in his eyes. And his daughter equally having eyes of fierce approval. He doesn’t like it, but he can’t put down how real it looks. He looks at Chungdae the same way too. And that scares Chenle because he doesn’t want her to marry such a guy.

She just came back home. His heart doesn't want to see her go just yet, especially not to a man who he still isn't too sure about. "Mr Lee."

Jeno peeks up and sits up. "Yes sir- I mean Mr Zhong,"

Chenle breathes out. "Are you treating this such as an interview?"

"Interview?"

"Seeing as though you've read my biography and probably Wikipedia, you seem to think that you have an understanding of my background," Chenle drinks a glass of water, firmly gazing into Jeno's stunned eyes. "Is that true?"

Jeno clears his throat, fumbling with his lips before nodding his head. "To be honest sir, I've known your work. The apartment my family and I lived in when we were little was actually designed by you."

"You could afford it?"

"Dad." Dae's shoulder slump.

Surprisingly Jeno chuckles. "It's okay babe- Dae, I mean." He quickly corrects himself, before turning back to Chenle. "I couldn't afford it, but my old man could....sort of. We lived with another family, so although tightly cramped, we all fit in together. To get back to you, being in that complex for a very short period of my childhood was sincerely the most mind blowing experience of my life."

"How so?" Chenle tilts his head. "And which complex was it? Situated where?"

"It's was called Clearview Water Hill. Situated in Goum NC."

Chenle nods his head. "I recall, it was amongst my first private building going public for government uses. It was labeled to be for the rich."

"To be honest, I felt rich as a young boy. The walls, corridors, rooms, even the water was so different. Not only that, but my dad was a construction worker so we watched a lot Construction channels. I had seen you appear time to time on tv. So regarding to me researching about you, I didn't have to do much except read it from Dae's pieces. The things I know about you are actually words Dae had written in her article pieces. She spoke extremely highly of you, it even gave off an impression that being in your presence is surreal. And it is… if I’m being honest."

Chenle is astonished (just when his mind slowly began to wonder if his daughter wanted to replace him), as his quick mind reflex suddenly pauses. His eyes turn from a sharp stare, to being enlightened. "You wrote a biography about me?"

"You used dad for clout?" Yezi laughs a little.

"What's clout?" Chenle asks, causing Yezi and Dae to snicker.

"It's slang dad," Yezi giggles.

Dae runs her hand through her hair swinging it back. "Not necessarily a biography, but advice on how to solidly build a future, brick by brick. I paid almost all my references to you and how successful you've been in paving the way brick by brick for your future,"

Chenle's face remains unchanged, yet Chungdae is in awe because she knows that Chenle is catching butterflies. Yezi is the one to voice it out. "Dae I told you not to boost his ego,"

This snaps Chenle out and he begins laughing. A sound which jolts Jeno out from his crave for the meat. His reaction makes Yezi laugh inwardly.

"Before I feel too honored. I still have to read what you wrote," Chenle remarks. "Word count?"

"2,500."

"Blog?"

"No, it's an article."

Chenle nods his head, shuffling in his seat bringing out his phone. "Name of website?"

"NationsWide,"

"Hmm," Chenle nods his head in approval. He's silent when scrolling through his phone, going through the about page and finding out the ratings of the website. Although it has a 8.8 out of 10 rating due to faulty writers and time consuming management, it has a high rating when it comes to work pieces. "It's a big shot company."

Dae finds herself smiling gladly turning to Jeno who pats her head- forgetting one of the rules that Dae put in place to not make any unnecessary physical contact. But she's happy non the less. “What’s the title?”

“I’m bad with titles, by it’s called Future Bricks Are Better Then Past Bricks.”

“It’s too long girl,” Yezi comments.

“I told her that too,” Jeno remarks smiling ligtly.

“Hey, I like it sounds good,” Dae cutely puffs her cheeks tempting Jeno to kiss her cheek, but he refrains from doing so.

Chenle searches up the title and immediately is impressed when seeing 5 stars in gold next to her article. That's his girl. He nods his head, as a smile crawls up his lips. "5 stars Dae, good job."

Her heart feels good. If it took Chenle simply reading from her article, then it would’ve saved time from Jeno backing her up. It's always difficult to get a reaction or compliment from him, so getting an actual reaction makes her feel joyous. Especially for something that he complained about minutes ago. In his silence of taking interest and suddenly reading his daughter's piece, Chungdae takes it as a cue to speak to Dae and Jeno.

"Are you two living together?" She smiles, causing a smile to grow on Jeno's lips as well.

"Yes,"

"Oh," Chungdae is a very traditional woman and always counters culture over modern society. So hearing that Dae and Jeno live together without having gotten married is a bit...it makes her feel uncomfortable for them. "Living together is such a huge commitment. It requires both of you to have an entanglement that you'll never leave each other,"

Jeno already being informed by Dae that her mother had the tendencies of being culturally educated, clears his throat in answering. "If it sets your heart as ease, we sleep in different rooms...to prevent us going too fast,"

"In going too fast, I assume you're talking about children?"

"Mum?" Yezi chokes on her food. "Please not that conversation, people are eating."

Okay," Chungdae nods her head letting out a little laugh with a hint of ease settling over. "That does set my heart at ease. I'm sorry if this makes you feel uncomfortable but, may I inquire about your financial status Jeno? You mentioned photographer, right?"

"Right," Jeno nods his head.

“Could you tell me more about it?”

"Uhm, mainly I work as an advertising photographer, so I range from models, to houses, to products even nature. So as a whole, I guess that’s stock photography. I have side jobs here and there as part time so yeah," he nervously peeks at Chenle wondering if he'd get pissed. However Chenle isn't even looking or paying attention to them, but instead continues to read, paying his whole mind to the article he's reading. He’s nearly done reading, but his ears also give an ear to hear the conversation.

"Hm." Chungdae nods her head. "Well, it's something. Who supports financially?"

"I pay house rent and Jeno buys our necessities," Dae mentions. But is unaware of Chenle's sharp gaze.

"Excuse me?" He suddenly perks up. "You're paying the rent?"

"Our apartment is under my name so-"

"Because of his felony charges?" Chenle perkily asks to which Dae shakes her head.

"Felony exceeds one year, so no. And he doesn't have a felony charge. It's because of his prison record of 10 months."

"And you're proud to say that?" Chenle mumbles doubtfully while shaking his head, continuing to read. Whilst Chungdae continues to ask Jeno, some more basic questions such as if he's religious, has siblings, has parents, if they know about Dae and his relationship- so on. Some questions Dae had never heard the answers to, as Jeno would completely ignore her or change the subject. Questions pertaining to his family. She never knew his dad died...no wonder he always made dark jokes about not having any.

"Meaning you're much closer with your mother right?" Chungdae questions with a sympathetic smile.

Jeno throughout all the questions that he doesn't want to answer he kept his head down and occasionally looked up from his food- even going on to eating more just to avoid the question or staying silent to ignore. But not knowing Chungdae, he isn't expecting her to nag on and on, and not wanting to make Dae's mother upset or cause Chenle to pin him out again he answers. "She kicked me and my brother out when we were teens."

"Now we’re getting somewhere." Yezi mumbles while folding her arms. "Who's your brother again? Was it-"

"Mark." Jeno stuffs his mouth again. Dae knowing that not only is he (slowly) getting enraged by the endless questions, she also knows how much he hates talking about his family.

So being alert she clears her throat. "Okay, mum I think you've got a pretty broad idea of who he is now,"

Chungdae smiles meekly. "You know Dae, when I first met your dad-"

Much to Yezi's disappointment, who hated this story with a passion (due to the fact that in her mind Chungdae was still considered a side woman) gets up going to look for her baby. "I'm going to check on Areum."

Meanwhile Chenle sets his phone down when he's done reading. Impressed with what he’s read, he approves by giving it a rating.

"As I was saying. When I first met him, he was already self-made, financially stable and had a big job. Everything was already there. However, he didn't tell me any of that. And I, didn't have a clue on who he was at the time. Meaning to say, I didn't have a pretty broad idea of who he was until I found out the basics as: what his beliefs were, what his priorities were, what his family thought of him, what he thought of himself deeply and what flaws made him human. Only when I found out all those things, was I... almost ready to be with him." A masked smile comes on her face. The type of smile that's ready to offend but not wanting to seem blunt. "Jeno, you seem like a fine young man right now. However, I'm worried that it might not be who you are when you're outside of our house. I don't know how you treat my daughter-"

"Mum-"

"Let your mother talk." Chenle blinks once turning back to Chungdae. This was supposed to be a grilling session for him to get to know Jeno. Yet with the way Dae gazes upon Jeno's face, worries Chenle. His heart isn't used to seeing this gob struck look of so called love on her face. Especially since he just met her. It's been years, so he doesn't want to cause tension that'll make her leave again.

It's better Chungdae does it and Dae listens, rather then him doing it and never seeing Dae again.

Up till now, and with the way that Jeno spoke on Dae's behalf on something that she was 'passionate' about, Chenle just doesn't like the idea of his daughter already being tethered to a man.

She still has a long life ahead of her, however being in a relationship limits her life and choices- oh gosh especially on her financial status. He wants his daughter to enjoy life to the fullest. And Jeno can't give her all that.

All that he can give her is words wrapped in love. And he doesn't want that for his daughter. His daughters deserved much more than cheap love and words.

"She has a point. The least you can do, is listen." Chenle says again a bit softly when looking into Dae's eyes. Dae inwardly groans, yet when turning her gaze to Chungdae she sighs with an upset face.

"Even though I didn't give birth to her, I know who she is. And I'm not trying to poke holes in your bubble but I am saying that you're from two different worlds. Two completely separate worlds. You won't clash on a lot of things. And right now, as happy and giddy as this relationship has been, remaining faithful together or even growing together won't be that easy. Jeno, judging from your lack of family touch, and your upbringing from your brother, I'm not too comfortable with my daughter being down below with you. I do see your passion and will to have a better life, but it might not be enough. Right now, I can most likely hope for your future to be filled with growth. Because I don't think it'll be easy. Based on your foundation, of how you both met, I'm still a bit... hesitant in accepting you. I just don't want this to end in foulness."

The silence lingers in the air with both couples, Chenle and Chungdae gazing at both Jeno and Dae. Jeno sets his empty bowl down having being full and listening to all the advice. Dae places her hand on his knee and he sighs. "If I'm completely honest Mrs Zhong, you're right."

Dae peeks her eyes to Jeno, hoping that what he’d say would contradict his statement.

"I do feel out of place at times when I'm with her. I feel that she deserves much better than me. Much much better than me. When driving here I even said that she left a mansion to cramp up with me in a little apartment. Look, I can't understand this, but I really really like your daughter and think that... she can do much better than me." Jeno nods his head agreeing. "But every time I think about her, or me, or, of us being together, I think of how much we've been through. It's true we met in uncanny circumstances but... The fact that she made the biggest sacrifice to stay with me, even though I gave her countless of reasons to leave, she still wanted to be with me, and that gives me the chills. Because she left your world, her world to be...in my world. And I can see where your concerns are, believe me when I say we've had this talk one too many times, but we always come to the same conclusion." His hand securely holds onto hers on top of his knee. "Only time will tell, if really this will work out, but I believe that when I stopped comparing her life before and her life now, it's made my head clear. And when she stopped seeing me as just that guy who broke into her house, we gathered a mutual understanding."

"What conclusions have you come to?" Chenle asks softly, his eyes on Dae yet he asks Jeno, because Dae's eyes are still on him.

Jeno clears his throat. "The conclusion that we're both humanly real and not perfect. And we can't be perfect, but if we keep trying to understand and love each other than yeah. I never knew how to manage my account and all that shi- stuff, but Dae's been really adamant on teaching me. I never knew how to cook. I only lived off by water and bread, but she knows and has taught me so many great dishes, especially the Chinese ones. I never mediated or did yoga before, but with her, every morning we're both up and yoga-ering as a way to restore our mental health. I've never been good at getting attention or knowing how to market, but Dae's a real professional at that and has helped me market my work. Not only to say she's an important aspect of my life, but she came from recovering from overdosing, not that I helped much but I made sure she worked out, ate healthy, spoke her thoughts, gave her a change of scenery, made sure she always saw the sun… I mean, if I also have to list the bad stuff, I can just say, she doesn't know how to keep her stuff organized. Always cluttered, everywhere and plain right messy- respectfully messy-"

"That's true." Chungdae chortles.

"But she's been improving, she now puts the toothpaste back in its case, instead of living it open and on the toilet seat. Not only that, but she used to stress so much so that she never slept, always up at night and working, but along the days I used to show her that she's got enough time to drop he shoulders, breathe, to unclench her jaw, to meet people who will understand her instead of being a kiss ass, to rest without feeling guilty, enough time to try as well as fail, to change paths, to close her eyes, to sleep and rest, to do so many things that she wants to do, her life is long. Another thing, she never knew how to be active, she's ambitious, but lacks the effort to actually move to get things done, she's always online. Yes she does yoga, but she always sat down behind her screen or desk slouching and writing, but now I can genuinely say she's keeping fit by constantly jogging, she exercises as well, and can throw a punch for self-defense, not to say I taught her how to be violent, but for a lady in her form I'm pretty proud that she can throw a man twice her size over her shoulder."

"I did it to him," Dae marvels cheerfully.

"I simply taught her what I know and she taught me what she knows. We're both taking the good in our lives and presenting it to each other trying to make our lives better and throwing the bad away. We read the newspapers together, watch the news, read psychology books and talk to each other and learn about each other. Because I love her and just want her to be happy without any restraints. We are both new to this love, so we're learning with each other not only how to receive love, but also how to give love. You know, she expresses herself through writing, she always writes, she struggles in speaking up for herself or formulating the right words for the right moment, thus it's why she used to be condescending and using her privileges to walk over people. But now, I don't know why she's not doing it now, but she gradually speaks and pushes herself to be genuine and understanding. Mrs Zhong, I understand that you don't trust me with your daughter, but I'm telling you honestly that I'm careful and gentle with her. I don't want to hurt her again, or even allow myself to lose her to a successful man who's got everything. I want to be everything for her. I'm working my ass off in getting to where I want to be, and making sure that she's happy and securely in her field. I don't have it now but I know that I'll get it. I'm trying my hardest, I'm putting my all and investing literally my whole life into this. I don't know what you want, but your daughter is here and she chose me, I can promise you that I won't put your family to shame."

Mr Zhong's ears are perked at Jeno's whole plea. He can see the ambition and drive in his eyes.

"Can I be honest with you right now." Chenle starts being equally respectful as Jeno has been. "I disliked you because you were poor and seemed unable. But. After reading what I've read, I can say that the Dae sitting before me, isn't the Dae with qualities that the world would reject like before. I'm still not for this relationship. But if I can at least have my daughter willingly help others, as well as herself, it gives you, Mr Lee, a mark in my books. It shows me how much you're invested in her. And another thing, if you, Dae, can't be pushed away from following your dreams, I think you'd be an excellent journalist."

"Thanks Dad," Dae smiles looking with admiration at her dad, causing Chenle to return the genuine smile.

"Keep writing pieces about me though," Chenle grins.

"Don't boost his ego," Yezi chuckles covering her face.

"Are you still hungry Jeno? Don't be shy if you want another round," Chungdae speaks up when seeing Jeno look at all the empty dishes. "There's plenty casseroles in the cuisine."

"Oh, no it's okay." Jeno smiles shyly. "Thank you Mr Zhong, and Mrs Zhong for the food. It was delicious,"

"I'm surprised you complimented Dae's cooking." Chungdae laughs before turning back and calling one of the maids names to come and remove the food. "Dae fights a lot when it comes to spices, especially with chili,"

"Well mother," Dae has a smug face. "Jeno here doesn't mind the spice or chili. He likes it hot,"

Jeno teasingly mumbles for only Dae to hear. "We're still talking about the food right?"

She playfully hits his thigh before turning to her mum. "I know what he likes to eat,"

"Honestly if you ask me, I still find it weird how you're with him." Yezi comments when the laughter dies down. Dae's jaw clinches but she eats on her rice (that she asked one of the maid to leave for her) remainign silent. But that's not the case for Yezi who glances up at her sister. "It's strange because I know you, and I know that this is not the type of guy you'd quote on quote fall in love with."

"Yezi." Chungdae calls out calmly, with intentions of warning her.

Chenle nods his head setting down his chopsticks when he's done swallowing a lump of meat giving his plate away to the maids. "No, Yezi's right. It's strange to see this, no disrespect to you Mr Lee, but it seems like Stockholm syndrome."

"That's so unfair. We just finished that discussion." Dae mumbles glaring at her sister and dad. "It's not-"

"I know," Chenle nods his head with a gentle smile. "With the way he's spoken about you, my ideas of him shifted. Perhaps it's not a forced love. I just need to get used to the idea of seeing you with him. That's all,"

"You can't force him down our throats, we still have to get to know him," Yezi comments.

"So Jeno, how about I get to know you more. If it's possible, drop me an email on your availability and I'll set up a date for you to come to my company."

Jeno's eyes widen. "Really?"

"I wanna see how good you are at your work of photography. There's some houses that will be completed within a week from now and I need some photographs. Will you be interested?"

Jeno gulps nodding his head. "Yes sir- I mean Mr Zhong."

"Good. Now if we all may, there's a resting area waiting for us,"

•

S1: EP14-16

22:48

"I can't believe you lied to my mum that we sleep in different rooms," Dae chuckles when entering the comforts of their shared room turning around to eye Jeno who unbuttons his shirt.

Jeno has a smug look on his face before tilting his head. "I mean, it's sorta true. I told you to take the other room, but somehow you’re always here even though your stuff is there,”

"That’s because it’s lonely sleeping alone.” Dae smiles when kissing his lips. “But still, I don’t know if she bought that.”

“If she did, then it’s best if we keep it under the wraps of how much of a freak you are in my room, in bed.” Jeno lightly chuckles, watching Dae walk backwards while running her hands up her body giving him teasing eyes.

“Regardless, I'm glad it went well.” She notes as she removes her shoes and gathers some wet wipes to clean off her makeup. “Gosh I'm so happy it went well. Seeing my dad and mum and Yezi and Areum was such a serene moment that I’ll never forget.”

Jeno removes both his blazer and buttoned down shirt turning to Dae who’s removing her makeup. “They were welcoming, I’m glad you invited me to experience this experience with you. Seeing you with your family only brought peace to my soul. At least you’re reunited with your family again, your mum, dad, sister…and even that little child. Although, I won’t lie, I’m surprised that your sister…kept that child,” Jeno tries to say without saying it. “It’s just odd,”

“I know,” Dae finishes cleaning the makeup off her face and applying some cream before she stretches her arms moving to the night stand lamp turning it on. “But you know what, she’s still my baby sister’s baby and I’m a proud aunt who gets babysitting rights.” Dae smiles brightly. “I just can't express it in words. I'm so happy right now." Dae smiles and bites her lip innocently. "Hey. Can you help me undo my dress?" Dae moves to the bed sitting down a little bit too exotically but Jeno still makes his way towards her.

Holding onto her calf, he kisses on her knee smiling before trapping her in between his body as he gets on the bed. “You’re so happy you’re getting turned on, I think this will be a problem,” Bending his head down, he softly smudges plentiful kisses along the side of her neck, licking and biting on her soft skin. He groans when Dae's hand secretly finds its way down his covered member and palms him soothingly.

"You forgot to tell my dad how good you make me feel,"

"Is that so?" Jeno rhetorically asks leaving envelope kisses on her collarbone whilst undoing the back of her dress. "Should've told him how well you suck me off,"

Dae giggles when her dress becomes loose, allowing her freedom to remove her arms and then her turtle neck- only resting in a corset and bra. Her lips crash onto his as he mouths his way down her neck undoing the strings of her corset. Having his warm fingers on her skin arouses her body to beg for him. She feels his big hands going behind her back unclipping her bra.

"Is this okay?"

"Mmh," She whispers. “Just do it,”

He continues to mouth his way up her body, her warmth on his tongue when he kisses her again. He strokes her heavy tits. Just as her lips find his again, the taste lingering of the wine present making her suck more on his tongue as he unbuttons his pants and lowers them together with his boxers already revealing his hard on. “I’m happy it all went well, because it means that they’ve given me permission to take you all the time,”

In one swift move he picks her up placing her on his shaft, as they both stare into each other’s eyes strings of moans leave their lips. Upon giving her time to adjust to his member, with her eyes fixed on his own lustful eyes give him the go that she’s ready, and he pounds himself hard once into her core earning him a blissful moan. He comes out slow before, going in hard again and then coming out slow. It becomes a cycle of himself going in and out until he’s sure that she’s okay. Within a second after ensuring, his body presses into her own skin loving the bounce of her breast. His eyes never leave hers, just as his slow passionate thrust becomes heavy and more impactful. His hips bucking into her, rampaging inside of her, her wetness invites and envelopes him with every coming in. Her eyes shut, with her hands on his shoulders, allowing him to do all the heavy lifting. She feels as though she might fly off him with every thrust he engraved into her.

She’s breathlessly moaning out at the top of her lungs, her head thrown back, just as his arms grip onto her waist, humping and grunting every time. She’s moaning out his name, calling out to him eagerly and passionately only making him grow harder inside of her. “Jen- fuck Jeno don’t stop, ah don’t stop~” He’s panting, holding her tight while his stamina takes over him and he holds her into him, allowing her movements and his to be fluid, going up and down, moving together.

She was his first and every time he’d get at it with her, he always felt the same as the first time. Special. He loved being inside her, how she made him feel. Under her skin and inside his head, he can’t help but press her into him hugging her tight as he pounds into her, his eyes on solely on her. Even though the struggle to keep her eyes open, his eyes are on her loving her every expression. She was so beautiful that he didn’t even know what to do.

When they both cum into each other, she’s left shaking on his member from the pleasure and that makes Jeno laugh. “I love when your legs do that, was it good?”

“Mhm,” She moans and slowly rides him circling her hips and bouncing lightly on him again. It goes on for another round, until they're both panting on the bed fully naked with steamy smiles. Jeno groans and curses out when Dae disappears underneath the blanket with a giggling laugh. “Fuck, are you not tired?” Jeno pants, feeling her mouth wrap around his shaft. “You don’t have to do it-”

Aside from having intercourse, the one thing Jeno didn’t ask for was blow jobs. Not only did it remind him of what his brother did to her, but he was afraid that her mentality consumed the behavior from the trauma she dealt with when Mark made her suck him off. Continuing to suck and blow, Dae doesn’t stop bobbing her head and taking him whole. For her, it allowed her to have control over the situation, rather than thinking that she had no power of her own. Jeno's muscles tense with pleasure before his legs are shaking again and she swallows his release laughing out in delight. Aside from them getting together, another thing that solidified them was how she broke his v-card and that for every time that they’d do it, he always felt attached to her and allowed her all the power she wanted with him.

"I'm going to shower," Dae gets off the bed being breathless, skimpily jogging seductively to the bathroom before peeking at Jeno who's eyes latch with adoration, she speaks up. "You should join me,"

"I'm coming," he smiles tiredly. Getting up from the bed stretching his arms, he picks up his own towel walking towards the bathroom however stops when hearing a faint knock on the door. He checks the time, frowning when it's late into the night.

He walks quietly to the door wrapping his waist with the towel. His eyes searching through the peephole. His eyes widen when noticing a familiar figure lighting up a cigarette.

Jeno ducks from the door when the figurine sends his fist flying to the door knocking on it. "Hello?"

Mark?

The person knocks for a while on, still smoking his cigarette. Jeno still ducked is confused and gets startled by Dae walking into the living room with a grin. "They you are,"

"Shh," Jeno mumbles with a panicked voice.

Dae's brows furrow. "Who's there?"

"Uh, I'm looking for someone,"

Dae suddenly hears the voice outside. She was asking Jeno, but hearing the answer come from outside she's perplexed. Looking back to Jeno who's chest goes up and down, she moves closer carefully. It seems he's hiding from someone. "Who're you looking for?"

"Does Lee Jeno, Lee Jeno live here?"

"Uhm.." Jeno sharply shakes his head in panic and Dae catches on. "I'm sorry but it's past midnight, and Lee Jeno doesn't live here,"

"Are you sure about that? Hey, please can you open the door. I'm a relative of his."

"I said Lee Jeno doesn't live here. Can you please leave before I call the police."

It's silent on the other hand before the man speaks again. "Fine, I'll come back in the morning. Let him know." Dae's about to speak in confusion but the person speaks again. "Tell him Mark came by. His brother. Alright. I'm going."

"Brother?" Dae quietly whispers and her eyes enlarge. Feeling exposed as though being ripped of her robe, Dae securely grips on her robe trembling back. "Jeno..." She pants out. "Was that, M-Mark?"

"I went to the address you gave me. Some woman was there, said he didn't live there." Mark yawns laying back on the ground next to Donghyuck who's looking up to the stars. "And what're you doing here bro?"

Laying down on the green freshly trimmed grass Donghyuck groans and opens his eyes. "I'm not your bro man. You shot me and my brother."

"You're still at that? Let the past be the past. Now that we’re both out, we should be looking out for each other," Mark chortles.

Donghyuck shakes his head. “I never got a proper apology from you,”

Mark fidgets around trying to find a good position. "I'm sorry for shooting at you and your bro. I keep saying that I thought that maybe it was the end for us. You weren't moving and we needed to go. At least shooting at you would permit them to focus on you while I escaped."

Donghyuck turns to Mark with frisky eyes. "You fucking say that with confidence."

"I'm sorry man." Mark apologizes lowly having a smirk on his face. "Should've had your back."

"Whatever." Donghyuck mumbles and sighs out. "Anyway. I saw that address in Officer Park’s visitation book. It literally said Jeno's residence, so I assumed it's where Jeno lives."

"The apartment looks too fire for Jeno. I don’t even think he lives there.” Mark scoffs. “Then again, it wouldn’t be so bad crashing with him.”

"Your brother seems to be in good terms with the police, he occasionally speak to his Parole Officer, Officer Na. So, I don’t wanna crash there." Donghyuck shrugs his shoulders not interested in talking about Jeno. "D'you find a job yet?"

"None. I just came out last week and am not willing to go back, but my patience is wearing thin on doing things the quote on quote right way." Mark sighs. "It's why I'm out here sleeping with you in a park like a homeless kid."

"I’m actually homeless dude." Donghyuck snickers lightly.

"Nah, your mum can take you back any time. You're just choosing not to go. Stubborn."

Donghyuck scoffs. “The day I stepped into prison was the day my family and loved ones began their ‘prison’ time as well. My bad decisions caused me to be separated from my family for years. Life for my family still went on and they had to learn how to navigate through the ups and downs without me. The harsh reality of losing my freedom was that I could not truly help my loved ones in times of need compared to as if I were present. It was a bitter pill to swallow knowing that I had also sealed their fate by my own hands. When I was there with them, I felt so out of place. I don't know how many years have passed, but her and Renjun are like an oil machine. They're so tight together and it makes me feel honestly like a fuck up son and brother. A fucking loser who only goes over when he’s hungry. I..Just left." Donghyuck finds himself honestly opening up. "Life would be better if I wasn't around them. And besides, I see her at work..."

After coming out of prison, he honestly tried to get back in his mum's good books, but it seemed really pressuring. Especially with Renjun ignoring him and pretending he doesn't exist. Donghyuck could feel the tension in the air whenever he was around them and he hated that. Even though he didn't want anything to do with Mark ever again, they surprisingly found each other again. Mark came out of prison by probation and was constantly kept on a leash. So obviously when he found Donghyuck under a large oak tree in a secluded park, he knew that his friend had been staying out of trouble, and joining him wouldn’t be so bad.

“But come one man, don’t you miss having a bed?” Mark asks. “We could crash at Jeno’s place until we get some shit together,”

“You do that. He’s your brother.” Donghyuck mutters. “And judging from the fact that he hasn’t contacted you should tell you that he may not be looking forward to reuniting with you. You said you heard a chick?”

“Yeah,” Mark mumbles. “She was like, Lee Jeno doesn’t live here. But I knew she was lying,”

Donghyuck chuckles lightly. “Well if that’s the case, and he’s got a girlfriend or something, he won’t let you back in easily,”

Mark groans. “I’m his fucking brother,”

“That’s what I said about Renjun, and he hates my guts,”

“Nah that boarder jumper-”

“He’s a citizen now,”

“Wow,” Mark snickers. “Either way, he was never your brother to begin with,”

For some reason that hurts Donghyuck, because he slowly started considering Renjun as a brother and everything he did was always for his mother as well as Renjun’s wellbeing. And despite being in okay terms with his mum, he also wanted to get back on Renjun’s good books. “Well if you wanna get back with your brother, I suggest getting him to sympathize over you because if he’s anything like Renjun, he won’t let you in his house,”

“That’s some brother,” Mark shakes his head. “But it’s cool, I’ll stay with you,”

Mark doesn't want to say it, but it's evident that they only have each other. While Mark didn't want to lose the friend he had, Donghyuck wanted to stay away as far as possible from him. “I thought maybe getting myself in an accident, like breaking my arm or starving myself, would have them take me in easily. But no, they’ve got stone cold hurts. But the little I know of Jeno, if you hurt yourself he could take you in,” Donghyuck plants the seed into Mark’s head. Now he’s just hoping Mark will take the bait.

It's why before dawn, before the sun comes out of its blanket, Donghyuck awakes early and gets ready for his day by simply wearing his leather jacket. His eyes go over to Mark before getting up and heading to his day job.

His mum was kind enough to buy him 2 extra pairs of trousers as well as 2 clean shirts, and Donghyuck kept them in the school’s janitor closet. He knew it wasn’t professional, but it’s not like the school would know- since the school also offered him janitor uniform which was a grey shirt with the school’s logo and white pants. So after cleaning his face in the male washroom, he heads into the tiny janitor’s closet to change up into his work uniform. The choice in color not only made him look approachable, but it singled him out as the cleaner.

Most of the time Donghyuck didn’t have to do much cleaning since the young kindergarten students would always clean up their home room classes early in the morning. Donghyuck only had to handle the staffs’ resting room, bathrooms, hall ways and occasionally cleaning outside the jungle gym. The kindergarten school was a moderately rich school with a big yard and no other buildings around. It had students from the age of 5 to 7, and only 7 staff members (including his mum), 1 principle and 2 janitors- in total 10 workers. The school had 6 working days, so Donghyuck worked Thursday’s to Saturday. With only a number of staffs team, the school wasn’t that big, but it was decently strong in the education department of training young students. One thing Donghyuck liked about it, was that it was a private school, meaning the young students were taught much more than the average kindergartener.

Donghyuck had students politely greet him, had some helping him with picking up trash and throwing it in the bin, and even (on some rare days) shared with him some of their merit sweets. But none of the students were like the little female student known by the name of Areum.

While she was like the rest of the students, politely greeting him, helping him after school when all her friends had gone and even giving him some of her merit sweets- ever since that day that they spoke on the bench, she was attentive to him.

“Hi Mr Sunshine,” She greets in a tiny voice that echoed loudly with a big bright smile.

Donghyuck turns his head down to the little kid, just as his mother who’s walking down the hallway towards him notices the little girl. “Hey kid,” Donghyuck greets noticing she has a basket and opens it up revealing some creamy cupcakes. She digs her hand inside and picks up one with a glittery label on a toothpick that said, Mr Sunshine. Donghyuck’s brows furrow with a little smile. “What’s this?”

“Today is my birthday,” She smiles brightly.

Donghyuck takes the glittery cupcake bending his knees and crouching down to be almost at eye level with the little girl. “You’re a leap year baby? How old are you now?”

“I’m now 6 years old,”

Donghyuck tries not to laugh. “Technically, you’re 1 years old because this is the first leap year in years, but I’m not gonna judge.” She smiles. “Well happy birthday kid. Did you make for your whole class?”

She nods her head.

“You’re a very kind little girl,” Donghyuck lightly pats her head smiling before he stands up. “Thank you for making me a cupcake. I don’t have a present for you now, but I can tell you a joke,”

“Okay,” She gets excited.

“Why did the clown go to the doctor?”

“Why?” Even before Donghyuck can finish, she already starts giggling.

“He was feeling funny,” Donghyuck puts emphasis on the funny as he moves his hands in a wave manner- and of course she loses her mind and topples over while laughing. Donghyuck pats her head cautiously. “Why don’t you head on to class. The bell’s about to ring, hurry,”

“Okay, bye Mr Sunshine,” She cools down from her laugh.

“See ya,” Donghyuck gets back up and drags the rest of the cleaning supplies back into the janitor’s closet. While opening up the door and goes inside, his mother (who stopped walking to watch the interaction) begins walking to the janitor closet only for her to freeze in her steps when noticing an all too familiar face…faces.

“Areum, don’t go too quick,” The lady in a navy nurse uniform turns into the corridor and finally sees the little girl. “Hey, wait up,” She walks with one large brown bag as well as a covered cake in the other hand just as a little girl, the same little girl Donghyuck was talking to, comes over and walks alongside her.

“Sorry mummy,” She smiles. “The bell’s going to ring,”

“Don’t worry about the bell, you’re going to mess up the cupcakes and doughnuts if you run too quick,” A man, standing next to them in a police uniform smiles down at the little Areum.

“Okay, I was just excited,” She bounces up and down. “I wanna give everyone a cake already,”

“Then let’s not keep you waiting,” The man has his hands filled with several plastic bags but still managing to hold onto the little girl’s hand. Donghyuck’s mother blinks twice and has to turn away while the pair and little girl walks past her.

His mother is in shock after recognizing that the police officer was Na Jaemin and the nurse looked exactly the same as the girl that had her house broken into by her son and friends, her name was Yezi. After they pass she quickly goes into the janitor’s room but stops midway when Donghyuck pulls the door open and dusts his hands while eating and chewing on the cupcake, being surprised to see his mum.

“Mum?”

“H-hey,” She greets with a tight smile, but then grabs his arm and quickly dashes outside of the building holding him tight.

“What’s wrong? What happened?” Donghyuck asks as he’s being dragged out the building. “What did I do?”

“Donghyuck, who’s that little girl that keeps talking to you?” She asks when they’re outside taking in one big breath.

Donghyuck tries to think for a second when trying to get this mum’s question. “I don’t know, Areum, why? Is it because of the cupcake? It’s her birthday and she gave me one,”

“That’s not what I’m asking, I’m asking whether you know who this girl, as in her parents?” His mother tries to calmly ask out.

Donghyuck furrows his brows and shakes his head while shrugging his shoulders. “I don’t know her parents. Why? Did she get hurt?”

Donghyuck’s mother can only stare at him with wide eyes feeling her heart beat fast. Her son just got out of prison and had been doing fairly well for some weeks now. She can’t allow anything bad to happen to him. “Look,” She breathes in nervously. “This little girl, just like all the other girls and boys have parents and families who are stacked with money and power. I just want you to be careful whenever you talk or engage with them. I doubt any of them would approve that an ex prisoner is a janitor at this school, they would lose their minds. I know these people. Which is why, I’m saying this. I don’t want any problems so I’m asking you, please Donghyuck, do not- and I repeat, do not find yourself in a problematic situation involving these kids. Okay?”

Donghyuck nods head when seeing how serious his mum looks. “I won’t. I promise,”

“Especially that little girl who’s always around you.”

Donghyuck nods his head again.

“In fact, I want you to stay as far away from her.” She pats his arm slightly and heads back into the school allowing her hand to massage her neck that became slightly stiff. “I hope he listens,”

Donghyuck doesn’t even have to think of the situation, especially regarding that little girl. If his mum was warning him, it only meant that this girl had parents who would cause havoc in his new path. So continuing to eat his cupcake he walks to the corner of the building and connects the hose pipe to begin watering the grass.

Yezi has to do a double take when seeing the man. Of course she can’t see his face but his backside has her in wonder. Especially since he’s eating a cupcake.

“Are you coming?” She snaps out of her thoughts when hearing Jaemin.

“Yes I am,” She smiles when buckling her seatbelt. “I hope Areum has fun today,”

“Me too,” Jaemin notes and starts up his car. “Hey, I wanted to ask you something,”

“Sure, as long as you’re still taking me to work,”

Jaemin begins driving turning his gaze lightly to Yezi before looking back to the road. “I was taking Areum to school the other day, and noticed something weird,”

“What? She picks her nose? Tells bad puns? Laughs and talks alone? I was worried too, but dad said it’s a natural thing for kids so it’s okay.”

Jaemin’s ghost smile fades when recalling what Areum was doing. “She was...” Jaemin sighs deeply as he himself didn’t even know how to say it. The sight was unusual and made him question what was going on in her head. Yezi takes note of his chilling tone, and watches him. “She’s an odd child, but I worry about her. I know it feels like I’ve pushed the boundary between work and your family, but I really do worry about her,”

“I’m grateful that you’ve always been there for me and my family whenever we called. And ever since Areum was born you’ve almost become like family to me. So I appreciate you so much Mr Na,” Yezi acknowledges Jaemin by meekly smiling in his direction. He was 7 years older then her, but whenever looking at him she always got butterflies. Much to her family, Jaemin was just an officer, but to her- he was like her best friend. “So to have you worried about her, makes me kinda feel anxious. What’s wrong? What did she do?”

“It’s not what she did… more like where did she learn it from,” Jaemin licks his lips peeking at her. “How active are you with your boyfriend? Sexually speaking.”

The question makes her cheeks and neck glow in warmth. She even shifts in her seat trying to remain calm. “Uh, Jaehyun and I… don’t really…we haven’t gotten on that boat yet,”

That’s news to Jaemin’s ears. “Really?” Yezi nods her head. “You haven’t had any inter-”

“It’s kinda hard thinking about sex when I was raped as a child.” Yezi mutters. “Did Areum say something odd?”

“No, no,” Jaemin runs his hand through his hair. He tries to be respectful considering Yezi’s history. “I’m just asking. A-actually, tell me about him. Jaehyun.”

“Pardom?” Yezi has to blow air out of her mouth when finding the atmosphere warm and a little bit too much for her. “You hate when I talk about him,”

“That’s because he’s 9 years older than you,” Jaemin mutters covering up with a cough. “I mean, I don’t have anything against the guy other than he’s 30 and you’re 21. He’s a great guy, has a good looking face, egotistical personality-”

“Jaemin,” Yezi drags out a sigh with her smiley face. “He’s nice to me. But what does asking about him have to do with what Areum did? What did she do, tell me?” Jaemin’s nonchalant face doesn’t budge only making Yezi much more adamant. “Jaemin?”

“I’m just looking out for her,” Jaemin says. “I know you work over time, and your dad doesn’t get back until late and your mum started attending some afternoon yoga classes- but really is there no one else you can trust Areum with? Nanny even?”

“The last time I trusted a nanny, I found her hitting Areum as a form of discipline. I’m not going down the nanny line again. Plus the one’s we have at home only work for my dad and mum. They can watch Areum, but I don’t want them too. She’s my little girl and I don’t want them to pontificate her mind,”

“Come on Yezi, and Jaehyun?” Jaemin’s eyes widen. “He’s a 30-year-old man. Just because he’s got a lot of free time doesn’t-”

“I trust Jaehyun because he makes Areum happy, she doesn’t get nervous or scared around him. And because he’s older he takes his responsibilities seriously. It’s not his responsibility, but he’s passionate about her and that makes me feel some form of safety.”

“The best I can do is drop her every morning to school while you go off to work early in the mornings. If I could look after her, after school, would you allow me too?”

Yezi has an unknown sad frown on her face, but subtly nods. “She doesn’t open up much to people and with you she’s afraid because you have a gun and deal with ‘bad people’, but if it’s what you want to do, I can consider it. But you already have so much on your plate,”

“Trust me Yezi, Jaehyun’s great. But there’s something off… maybe it’s not even Jaehyun. Maybe it’s her friends at school,” Jaemin begins second doubting himself.

“Jaemin what did she do, that has you so worked up?” Yezi pleads this time feeling worried.

Jaemin sighs. “It’s not a big deal, just…” Jaemin’s eyes brighten. “What about your sister? You said she’s clean again, can’t you ask her-”

“I’m not gonna ask her until you tell me what happened with Areum?”

“Fine.” He rolls his eyes, before the nerves kick in again. How would he tell her that he caught her daughter bouncing and even dry humping herself on the backseat of his car? She would be in a frenzy state. But then again, Jaemin could be over thinking it and Areum wasn’t doing anything scandalous and he could’ve saw wrong….no he couldn’t have saw wrong for 18 weeks now. “She humps her seat every morning I take her to school.” Jaemin reveals. “And she does it excessively, like she’s trying to pleasure herself. I, I could be reading too much into it but I can’t help but wonder why she does that. I’ve tried asking her but she stops and then says nothing.”

“So, you’re suspecting Jaehyun of-”

“No, I’m not. I just.” Jaemin stops himself before finding the words. “She’s a little girl and takes things in easily. In a way, if he’s the one watching her afterschool, don’t you think she’s learning things from him? Plus I could be wrong about him, and it’s not him but instead it’s the students at her school. Maybe some male student or even the female students, I don’t know Yezi. If I’m reading too much into it, then there’s nothing wrong and it’s nothing to worry about, but if it’s something true then I think you should check on the people around her because she’s learning some bad things for her age. She just turned 6 today,”

Yezi is in silence as well as astonishment from everything Jaemin says. “Humping her seat how?”

Jaemin doesn’t say anything but then his body starts awkwardly moving back and forth before he starts bouncing lightly on his seat. The scene is erotic and has Yezi’s eyes widening. “Like that,” Jaemin says before stopping and resting back on his seat.

Yezi sharply intakes some air and looks away. Her cheeks are flushed and the tempo of her heart changes. However, for the rest of the ride, she says nothing until Jaemin reaches the hospital in which she interns in. “Have a good day,” Jaemin says, a small smile sipping onto his lips just as his eyes look guilty for causing her tension so early in the morning.

Yezi stiffly smiles and unlocks her door stepping out. She shuts the door and heads to his boot to bring out her work bad- afterwards she goes back to the window and knocks on it. “I’ll call Dae and see if she’s available. Uh, do you mind picking me up afterwards?”

“Time?”

“Half past six,”

“Sure,” He nods his head but he can’t help when asking. “Will Jaehyun be with Areum?”

She stiffly nods her head and tilts her head to the side looking anxious. “I’ll talk to him during my lunch break. Thanks for telling me.”

For the next coming of days, Yezi is highly cautious of Areum. She tries spotting or even catching Areum when ‘humping’, but just like Jaehyun said perhaps Areum wanted to pee on those days that Jaemin picked her up. Jaehyun assured Yezi that Areum only acts like that when she really wants to use the bathroom. Her suspicion died down when Jaehyun assured her that Areum is a good girl and doesn’t know things like that- and if she did, then he would put it down immediately. And even when Yezi tried investigating by talking with teachers at her school, and with her dad and mum- they were confused by the brass topic. ‘How could she know such?’ They’d ask. Even when Yezi would hump the floor and ask Areum what was happening- Areum didn’t seem to know what her mother was talking about or even doing. So while Jaemin never brought it up again, Yezi was able to relax and hoping that indeed Jaemin might’ve seen Areum in her pressed state and in need to use the toilet.

However, for Donghyuck who constantly watches Areum rub herself on the bench when everyone’s gone gets bothered by it. Like his mother said, he tries to stay away from Areum as much as he can. But he can’t help it, when day by day it really looks scandalous. This little girl was being sexually abused and mind fucked by her uncle.

Donghyuck doesn’t know the depths of it, of how much the little girl knows, but it surely gets on his nerve every time he’d see the smirking uncle touch the girl. Areum, even though Donghyuck didn’t know her, was a sweet little girl who loved making friends with everybody. She was a little class clown who brought smiles to everyone’s faces. Donghyuck remembers when on one assembly, while the students were watching their entertainment of the week by some dancing clowns, Areum got up as well and began dancing- challenging the clowns, bringing smiles and laughter to everyone’s faces. Donghyuck even acknowledges how smart she is, from always getting golden sticker stars on her forhead to the amount of merit sweets she’d get- this tiny little girl was oblivious to the fact that she was being used by her uncle, all in the name of playing.

And so when approaching her after school past 3pm on a Thursday, he notices how tired she looks when dragging her pelvis slowly on the bench.

“Hey kid,” He pipes up with a tiny smile, causing her little drained face to meekly smile.

“Hi Mr Sunshine.” She tries smiling but she looks so tired.

Donghyuck takes a seat next to her on the bench taking a look at her. “No joke today?”

She stops humping hanging her head down.

In her lack of response, Donghyuck clears his throat speaking again. “Waiting for your uncle?”

She looks up and nods her head. Donghyuck feels strange watching her look so drained of energy before her gaze goes back to the ground. It’s silent for a little while before he speaks up again.

“Do you still play that game with your uncle?” The question itself makes Donghyuck itch the wrong way, but when Areum tenses up his face thickens with anxiety. “What’s wrong?”

“I don’t like playing fuck with Uncle Jung anymore.” She murmurs out. “But he likes playing it.”

Donghyuck’s jaws lock before he tries asking another question. “Why don’t you tell your mum? Or dad?”

“Mummy likes him too much,” She answers. “And I’m scared she’ll be angry with me,”

Donghyuck finds himself feeling bad for the little girl. She must not have a father, and her mother might be a strict rich parent or something along the lines- Donghyuck thinks to himself. “I think you should tell mummy. If you tell her what uncle does to you, she’ll tell uncle to stop.”

She shakes her head timidly and looks nervous. “Uncle Jung will punish me. He told me to never ever tell mummy or else fuck will become harder,”

Donghyuck’s brows furrow in distaste. That fucker, he thinks. “How about this,” Donghyuck breathes in. “I can tell a teacher and then your teacher will tell your mum-”

“Nooo,” She shakes her head looking petrified. “Uncle Jung doesn’t like bad girls. If I’m a bad girl, he’ll punish me.”

Aside from her outburst in stress, Donghyuck can tell that something has changed in her. Whereas the first few days she looked content of the ‘game’, she now seems more reluctant. “Do you like playing that game?” He asks lowly.

Areum shakes her head before getting up from her seat when a black vehicle stops in front of them. Donghyuck is deep in his thoughts until a car comes. He bites his lip to hold back his anger, but he gets up and walks with Areum until her uncle is out the car.

“Hey puppy,” He greets with the pet name. Donghyuck’s ears are sharp when hearing the ‘happiness’ sip out of Areum. Poor little girl is so afraid that she even fakes her happiness. “She wasn’t a bother was she?”

Donghyuck’s head turns to the man and he shakes his head. “She never is. Hey uh, sir.”

“Yes?” Jaehyun peers back at the man after shutting the door when Areum gets in the backseat.

Donghyuck can’t find the words to say when looking at the little girl in the backseat. He only feels anger boiling in him. She’s trapped in the car with an abuser. “Whatever game you’re playing with her you should stop.”

Jaehyun’s head tilts to the side and he blinks. “Excuse me?”

“You heard me.” Donghyuck turns in his step and walks back to the school.

Little does Donghyuck know when Jaehyun gets back in the car he turns back to Areum who has her head hanging low. “Areum were you a naughty girl today at school?”

Areum looks up and shakes her head.

“Are you lying to me?”

She shakes her head again.

“Does that guy know about the game?”

Areum hesitates a little and her eyes look down. Jaehyun starts his car being angered. He doesn’t say anything except plays his jam as he drives back to his house whereby he’d stay with Areum until 18h30 and take her back home. Upon getting to his house, he helps Areum undress into the spare clothes her mother left over at his house, and begins assisting her with her homework. When they’re done, he allows her to watch tv while he works on his laptop. Initially, they’d have ‘play time’, but Jaehyun is heated with anger that he denies her request of play time and goes into his room. Not long after, Areum knocks on the door and pushes it open.

“I’m sorry Uncle Jung.” Areum apologizes when standing by his door. “I won’t tell anyone again.”

Hearing that, Jaehyun exhales lowly. Recently he started doing things a little bit different with her, perhaps it was too much for her. “What did you tell him? And don’t lie to me.”

She keeps her head down, being scared to look up. “I don’t know.” She admits. “That I play fuck with you and that you touch me here.” She points to her lower part.

(You can skip this part and go straight into part 2- it's overly gruesome and i felt disgusted writing this part. I'm not projecting that Jaehyun would ever do this in real life.)

PLAY: Season 2: Part 2

Jaehyun rolls on his chair and faces her. It took him only a few conversations for him to convince Yezi that he wasn’t doing anything inappropriate with her daughter. And truly speaking he wasn’t…he only liked to show Areum how her body worked and what she should do to relieve herself. He liked to touch…and see how she liked it. Aside from that, he didn’t think that he did anything wrong. She would soon forget about it as she grew up, but for now he was aroused at how the little girl’s body worked. Despite being so young, she reacted pleasantly to all the games they’d play together. He didn’t want to stop, and he surely enjoyed himself while playing with her- if anyone else found out about this, they’d have him imprisoned. “Do you want to see me go to prison?”

Her eyes widen and she shakes her head. “No Uncle Jung.”

“Do you want mummy to stop us playing together?”

She shakes her head.

“Then next time, don’t tell anyone. If you don’t like the games anymore, tell me and I’ll stop. But never ever tell anyone again, or I’ll be forced to punish you, and you don’t want to be punished right. Now come to me like a puppy if you want me to be good to you,” Jaehyun gives her a little grin before patting his thigh. She hesitantly gets on all fours and begins crawling to him. Upon getting to his feet she looks up to him sticking her tongue out looking just like a little puppy.

Jaehyun coo’s lightly and carries her over his lap before rounding his chair back to the laptop. “Did you try and relieve yourself today?”

She shakes her head. “No,”

“Bad girls don’t lie my puppy. I’ll ask one more time, did you relieve yourself today?” As Areum sits on his lap, he continues on typing out on his laptop of some orders that needed to be made from his car dealership store.

“I was trying, but I couldn’t.” She shyly admits. “Can I play on the horsey Uncle Jung?”

“I’m a little busy right now, but I’ll let you ride the horsey and then we can play okay?”

She eagerly nods her head, before Jaehyun man spreads his legs allowing Areum to scout over his crotch, she sits on his sleeping manhood and begins grinding on him slowly. Jaehyun grunts lowly and shifts his hips slightly up to give her better access. His member begins waking up when her tiny hips begins to grind faster. Areum closes her eyes, as her fingertips grip tighter onto his thighs as she feels the horsery waking up. She parts her legs a little to see the horsey bump. “Look Uncle Jung, he’s waking up.”

“He likes it,” Jaehyun mutters, now scampering to finish the package details and deals so that he can attend to Areum.

Meanwhile Areum’s body vibrates when it seems like she’s finally hit that spot that was always in need. She let’s out a cute tiny moan, just as Jaehyun hits send and shuts his laptop. “Good Girl.” He encourages when her humping weakens. “Do you wanna play the game now?”

She looks up and eagerly nods her head. Jaehyun picks her up and carries her out his study and into his room. He places her gently on the bed while he moves under the bed to pull out a box of his pleasing toys. He get’s out a pink dildo as well as pink vibrator. Areum’s eyes are already glistening with eagerness and she adjusts herself on the bed.

Jaehyun sets the toys on the bed and kneels down on the floor, pulling Areum to the edge on the bed. She smiles when he gets his hands underneath her skirt and over the strap of her panty. He slowly starts pulling them down while Areum as expected lays on the bed and bucks her hips up to help Jaehyun remove her panty quick. He lifts up her skirt, allowing him the full view and access of her tiny clean and hairless vagina. He stretches her legs seeing her it was slightly wet. He gets the lubricant and squirts out the lube.

Areum shivers by the cold slimy liquid pouring on her lower half. Even though Uncle Jung said that this liquid would help in easing his fingers inside, Areum thought it wasn’t working, since she’s been feeling so much pain. “Uncle Jung?”

Jaehyun snaps his head up being snapped out of the hypnotizing view. “Yes my puppy,”

“Please can you not put your finger inside me again. It hurts,” She mummers.

Jaehyun’s hands move up her small little legs before his thumbs play with her folds by opening and closing them. She was so beautiful, Jaehyun couldn’t wait until she became a teen, she’d have the most striking and juiciest of pussy’s. His thumbs play over her pussy lips mixing and spreading the lube everywhere. His face comes close and he looks up to her who has her eyes on the ceiling while biting her skirt that’s over her mouth. “Because you were a bad girl, I wonder what I should do to you,” Jaehyun mutters as his lips hover over her pussy. “Since you don’t want me to put my fingers… Should I eat you out?”

She disliked having him eat her, but it was better than his fingers. So when she feels warmth over her area she tenses up and squeezes her eyes shut. Jaehyun’s tongue laps over her pussy and he twirls his tongue over her little bud. He’s not soft at all when sucking in her bud and continues to rub his tongue over her whole core. She whimpers while hearing Jaehyun slurping down on her like some kind of meal. Jaehyun grips underneath her butt as he positions her closer to his devouring tongue. He makes her wrap her legs around his neck as he continues to lap at her quickly. The strawberry lubricant mixing with the slightly sweet taste of her own nectar. Jaehyun moans out, when her tiny whimpers begin to pick up and her own core pushes more into his mouth.

“Uncle Jung,” She gasps while getting closer to her edge, but like always Jaehyun stops and she’s forced to let out a whine by the unfinished arousal. Jaehyun smirks and unwraps her legs from his, his lips being wet and coated with lube and her own nectar.

“Because you were a bad girl, I won’t let you enjoy this,” Jaehyun smirks and picks up the vibrator. He switches it on watching it shiver as it begins vibrating. Jaehyun places the triangular shaped vibrating vibrator over the little whole. He carefully sticks it in- causing Areum to squeal delightfully as she bucks her hips into the vibration of the vibrator.

He places a finger over it and glides over her bud enjoying her exasperated faded stare. Since he couldn’t get it from her mother, then Areum was the next best option. Her expressions where fluid with passion. She held nothing in. She looked especially arousing that it just pushed Jaehyun over the edge a lot of the time.

Picking up the soft dildo (which he bought just for her) while his other hand holds onto the vibrator. While she gets closer and closer to her edge Jaehyun prepares himself for when he has to remove it. With one hand he places the lube over the tip of the dildo. And just as her legs shake he stops the vibration. She whimpers like a little puppy and Jaehyun smiles. “Uncle Jung,” She whines but he shakes his head with dark lustful eyes.

“If you didn’t tell, then maybe I was going to go soft on you, but because you told you’ll be punished.” Jaehyun states and directs the soft male dildo penis over her little whole. “Do you wanna ride the horsey?”

Despite being zooted out she still nods her head lazily and shuts her eyes again, preparing herself. Jaehyun prepares to place the dildo’s tip insider her like usual, but something comes over him when seeing the young girl being vulnerable with her eyes closed.

“Don’t open your eyes okay my little puppy,” At that she shuts her eyes tighter, just as he shifts himself and unbuckles his pants. Very slowly he slips his pants and boxers down before standing up and adjusting his cock that’s already rock hard. Using one hand, he places his palm over her eyes covering them from seeing anything, before groaning and grunting when setting his tip over the warm squishy hole. “Ah,” He lowly grunts. “Just the tip,” He whispers to himself, when together with the lube over her core, he gently pushes himself into her warmth.

Unlike the skinny dildo penis, his tip is slightly bigger and thicker causing her to gasp in pain. She tries to get up, but Jaehyun keeps her down, when he continues to slowly stretch up her walls and entering just the tip. He watches as his pink tip struggles to squeeze into the little girl’s hole, but he doesn’t stop as he continues on.

Areum at this point is grunting and squeezes her eyes shut her toes curling and the newfound pain. “Uncle Jung,” She barely manages to get the words out her mouth into a loud audible phrase as the pain consumes her.

What was supposed to be the tip, happened to be half of his dick slowly being riled in and out of her. Jaehyun can tell that she’s passed out because her body is non-responsive to the pain, but he’s not worried because it’s not the first time she’s passed out. And so without having to worry of whether she sees or not he removes his hands from her eyes and continues thrusting in a slow pace until her tiny whole that wraps around him invites him in to slide easily. He only places his dick by half inside of her watching the bulge form on her belly with each and every new thrust.

PLAY: Season 2: Part 2

(i'm truly sorry for that whole scenery.)

[Taglist: @rizykim | @sexygrass | @jenjaemjam | @lvmarfc | @haechanistfriends | @markleefuckme ]

#Donghyuck imagine #haechan imagine #nct dream imagines #jaemin fanfic #jisung fanfic #mark imagine #mark fanfic #nct mark fanfic #nct mark #lee jeno fanfic #chenle fanfic #renjun fanfic #nct angst #nct longshot #nct slow burn #donghyuck long shot #na jaemin fanfic #nct x oc #oc x nct #nct jaehyun #nct jaehyun smut

[five-bi-five-mind]

Lost at Sea (Pt. 2)

Fandom: Criminal Minds

Pairing: Jennifer Jareau x fem!Reader

Word Count: 4.4k+

Summary: Things haven’t exactly gone your way since you got released. You weren’t happy with the turn of events and with each passing moment you were getting more scared. Not for your own safety, but for the woman you love. 

Warnings: Mentions of guns; mentions of cults; mentions of religion and religious indoctrination. 

Series Masterlist | Part 1 | Part 3 

Shallows

Things were not going your way. After being released, the whole team was circling you. No one was letting you out of their sights, JJ especially. You thought about taking off again, telling yourself that it would be better, to keep everyone safe. For some reason, you thought that wouldn’t work that well this time. Maybe it was the fact that if JJ wasn’t by your side, someone else was. It felt like they all put everything on hold for you, and in a way they did. Another reason you thought fleeing wouldn’t work is because you were starting to really understand the depth in which JJ had feelings for you. There was this nagging feeling in the back of your mind that if you took off, she would go to extremes to find you again. Your safety was her top priority and she made that incredibly clear every single day she was glued to your side. 

Meanwhile, you were torn between two choices with a fear that they’d have the same outcome. If you did decide to actually try to leave again, she would follow you. You had a good reason to believe she’d try to go to the cult, guns blazing, without any rationale until she found you. And that’s just one extreme length you could think of. There were about ten other scenarios similar to that one that you could see JJ enacting. None ended well for her when you ran those scenarios through in your head. The other option was you let her stay by your side. The cult was watching you and you knew they had a habit of breaking people down. Even if you were currently trying to give JJ the cold shoulder, it didn’t take a profiler’s skills to know she meant something to you. They’d catch on, they’d catch her, and that wouldn’t end well for her either.

The fact of the matter is, you were stuck. Your only game plan was to try to push JJ’s buttons until she pushed away from you. It wasn’t working though. If you were being honest, it made your heart go crazy, seeing the way she was so devoted to you. She might not have said those three words yet, but you knew. It was in the little things she would do for you. The way she knew what comforted you. It was in her gentle tone when you seemed shaken and the quiet intensity she had around you. At all moments, she was ready to lay down her life for you. You could see it in her eyes. It made your heart ache. What was worse is that, deep down, you knew that she could feel the same kind of love for her coming from you. As much as you tried to hide it, as much a you tried to push, you knew she could feel the underlying reason. Before this whole thing blew up, it wasn’t like you were exactly hiding how head over heels you were for her. But now things are different, she’s in danger because of you and she’s just not buying a word you’re saying. You needed to step up your act. 

So you came up with a little… well, you were calling it a “performance.” When JJ came home from the BAU that night, she was following your every move. It was like she was more on edge than usual. If you went to the kitchen, she followed. If you sat on the couch, she sat next to you. If you so much as tensed for a second, her eyes scanned the room for incoming threats. It was honestly a little too much for you, which helped your plan along. 

At this point in the evening, you had had enough of her overbearing behavior. You were going back and forth, trying to urge her to let you stay elsewhere. The believability of it all was helped by the fact that you were starting to feel suffocated, stuck even, in this house with JJ. Where once you were comfortable here, now it was starting to feel almost like your jail cell did. Small, cramped, with absolutely no privacy. You missed your home, you missed going out, you missed how things were. Of course, even if JJ did let you roam free, you’d still be looking over your shoulder everywhere. Honestly, at this point you’d take even so much as one single day in a different place than hers. But that wasn’t the goal, the goal was to permanently get away from her. Or maybe not permanently, if this crisis could be solved. You didn’t think that would happen any time soon though, and if it did the damage between you two might already be too great. So, if you could just convince her to let another team member help you, maybe it would work. Maybe she’d be just safe enough. Hopefully. There were plenty of other people you could’ve stayed with even. But of course, when you were released and the team was going over their next moves and how to keep you safe, JJ immediately  jumped at the chance to have her eyes on you. She insisted and everyone agreed. It was infuriating. You tried to protest, but you didn’t want to give away too much about your… history with JJ. As far as you knew, no one else on the team knew what went on between the two of you behind closed doors. Maybe they had some idea, but no one had confronted you about it, so you had hopes they remained in the dark. The less people who knew what JJ meant to you, the better. But then that unknowing from the team meant you couldn’t exactly argue your case to not let her win here. So why wouldn’t they agree? And that’s how you found yourself stuck. 

It had been a week since then. You both were running in circles, not just in the fights you had but in the case as well. With each passing minute, though, you got more nervous. “Things are just… complicated between us, Jennifer.” You sighed, stopping the little dance of avoidance you were trying to do. “Do you really think it’s healthy that I stay here?”

“You’re safer here,” she insisted. 

“This is hard, JJ. It’s hard for me, it has to be hard for you too.” 

“I can manage.” She was really standing her ground. “Look, I know you want to be more involved. I know you feel stuck inside all day. It’ll work out.” Her firm stance held strong, but her tone was gentle, reassuring even. “Just stop… Stop fighting me on this. Please.”

“It’s not that I don’t want to be stuck here. It’s not about being stuck, JJ. It’s that I don’t want to be stuck here with you.” You were going for the gut punch now. Maybe with those words out there she would finally back off for her own good. Of course, they were blatant fucking lies, but you tried your best to make it sound as sincere as possible. The look on JJ’s face told you that perhaps you actually struck a nerve. 

JJ looked taken aback. Her jaw clenched and she took a minute to just stare at you. So many emotions flashed through her eyes. Hurt, disbelief, disappointment, but then finally they settled on anger. “I’ll stay out of your way then,” Her voice was low. “But I’m not going anywhere and neither are you.” 

Damn it. Of course she was too fucking stubborn.

“Just switch with Alvez,” you pleaded. Anything to get JJ away from you at this point. If your hurtful words didn’t work, you didn’t know what would. “This is too hard for us, JJ. He can watch over me just as well as you can. I’ll be safe with him.” 

“You’re. Staying. Here.” JJ was seething. How dare you doubt her ability to protect you? How dare you doubt her ability to separate feelings from work? You didn’t want her, fine. But she still loved you with her whole god damned soul and she wasn’t going to let you out of her sight until this situation was taken care of. She wasn’t leaving you alone. Maybe you didn’t feel the same way about her, maybe what her gut was telling her was wrong, but that didn’t stop her from loving you with her entire being and to see you hurt would kill her. She lost you once and the way she shut down scared the hell out of her. She wasn’t going to lose you again, even if it meant she’d only have you in her life as a friend, or hell even just a business associate. JJ knew if she took her eyes off you for one moment and something happened, her whole world would come crashing down. So, she was going to stand her ground. She wasn’t going anywhere. 

Of course that posed a huge problem for you and for her own safety. “You need to give me space, JJ. I want- No, I need space.” Your choice of words needed to be harsh. Whether you meant it or not, you had to get through to her. “Why are you clinging so damn hard?” 

“Because I love you for fucks sake!” And there it was. The room stood still and you both just stared at each other, your eyes wide in shock, hers burning with rage. For a moment you forgot everything but the sound of those three words. 

“I love you,” she said again in a quieter voice after a couple deep breaths. You couldn’t help your reaction, you had longed for those words back when things were more simple. After all this, though, you had accepted that you would never hear them. Yet, you knew JJ was persistent so you shouldn’t be surprised. Your eyes softened as she stared back at you. She put her whole heart in those words, you could see it in her eyes. “I love you,” she said again, a little more firmly. 

JJ took one step and then another until she was in your personal space. You made no move to stop her, forgetting for a moment why you were pushing her away in the first place. She was in increasing danger every second she spent near you, but your mind was totally blank. The only thing you were aware of was your heart pounding in your chest and the shell of her perfume as she stood mere inches from you. Her hand reached up slowly, before placing itself softly on your cheek. Those three words echoed in your mind again over and over again and all the control you had this past week, trying to resist JJ, was just slipping so easily. You were utterly disarmed.  

JJ leaned forward, you stayed frozen. She paused for a moment, the distance between you two barely non-existent. She was looking for any signs that you wanted her to stop, but she didn’t find any. When her lips finally touched yours everything melted away. She had kissed you countless times, but this time it was the most intoxicating feeling of them all, rivaling the first time she leaned in for a kiss.

She kept her lips pressed against yours in a steady, but still breathtaking kiss. The hand on your cheek moved to press to the back of your neck, pushing your lips all the more firmly into hers. And then your hands had a mind of their own, grabbing onto her waist to pull her closer. Whatever ounce of control you had left was utterly gone at this point. You forgot why you weren’t allowing this amazing feeling to take over you anymore. All thoughts of keeping her away disappeared and the only thing flooding your mind was JJ… JJ… JJ.

God, the way she kissed you felt amazing, you craved this, your very soul ached for this. Her lips moved against yours in an ever growing need to feel you close to her once again and you met her with just as much hunger. But then the anxiety creeped back in, starting as a whisper in the back of your mind but turning into a scream. As much as the part of your brain that desired her tried to push it down, it started to overpower. It started to drown you. She could get hurt because of you. She could get killed because of you. Stop. Stop.

“Stop!” You used your grip on her waist to try to shove her away. Her hands immediately dropped from you and you instantly saw all of the hope fizzle from her eyes. Both of you stood there for a moment, breathing hard, the air in the room filled with that tension again that made your skin crawl.

“I don’t want this, JJ.” Again another lie, but what else could you do? Except, this time you had no doubt in your mind that JJ could see right through.  

You kissed her back. Not only that, but JJ could feel the emotion pour out of you from it. She knew, as much as you tried to hide it while under her protection. JJ knew. 

“I got carried away,” JJ mumbled. “I’m sorry.” 

“I think… I need to be alone for the rest of the night.” Your eyes dropped to the floor. Not wanting to see how JJ was taking your words. She didn’t believe them, you knew that deep down. But it didn’t mean you would stop trying to push her away. It was for her own good. 

JJ just nodded in response and watched as you turned to leave. You hid yourself away in the bedroom for the rest of the night. The kiss replayed on both your minds. You longed for more, but each time you re-lived it the feeling of dread creeped up in your chest. For JJ, however, it felt like a reassurance. She confirmed what she had suspected. She would get you to admit your feelings, she’d get you to see she can handle the situation that you pulled her into. She will fight for you, she will stay. And that’s exactly what you were scared of. 

—————————————————————-

JJ was gone when you heard a knock on her door. She wasn’t gone often and when she was it wasn’t for long. You were barely left alone, but the team was stretched thin with this case, on top of others too. JJ needed to pull her weight as well so she opted to go to the BAU to grab some files, only problem was that no one could fill in for your “watch duty.” Reluctantly, JJ deemed it safe to leave you for no more than 30 minutes. No one was going to snatch you from her house in broad daylight. At least, that’s what she tried to convince herself. What made it worse was the security detail that staked out her house for your safety only came at night so she could rest somewhat easily. But you’d be okay, it was okay she told herself. This was important, so she had to leave. 

When you heard the knock you were immediately alert. Your eyes took in your surroundings, as if the knock signaled someone was already in the house. But you were safe, so you decided to scope out the visitor. 

With care, you tried to quietly creep up to the door. Upon reaching it you slowly leaned forward, your eye zeroing in on the little peep hole. And when you saw who stood on the other side your heart stopped. 

There he was, Tyler Anton in the flesh. The man who ran the cult, the man who’s paper trail you had been chasing. He stood there, a meek smile on his face, posture relaxed as he patiently waited. As if he wasn’t hunting you down, as if he wasn’t the very reason your life and everything around you that meant anything to you was threatened. 

He knocked again, checking his watch nonchalantly after he did. You weighed your options. Call for help? He might get arrested and then there’s two outcomes: His followers come for everything you hold dear in revenge or he gets released and you just royally pissed off a powerful man. 

You could just not answer the door. Pretend no one is home, but then what? Were there others waiting, hidden around the corner. What if they don’t leave? If they don’t snatch you, would they snatch JJ?

You could… open the door. That was a crazy idea, an obvious move that plays right into what he wants. But if you didn’t, did you risk her safety? 

Option three it is. It was crazy, it was definitely crazy. Your hands trembled as you reached for the door. You turned it ever so slowly, holding your breath for what might come. Someone could jump you, shoot you, who knew. Although, you imagined if he were on your doorstep, murdering you in public would be a bad look. He was more calculated than that, you knew that about him. 

When you pulled back the door, he didn’t look surprised at all. “Hello,” his tone was shockingly polite. “I’m Tyler Anton. You may know me from-“

“I know who you are,” you cut him off, your voice stern. Trying as hard as you can to show no fear you crossed your arms and gave him your best intimidating glare. It didn’t phase him at all.

“I suppose you do. May I come in? I’d like to have a chat.” His smile was charming, inviting even, but you knew everything about this man. He was a wolf in sheep’s clothing and the minute he stepped foot inside, you knew he wouldn’t be leaving without you dragged behind him. In fact, you weren’t sure why he even asked or why he was on your doorstep like it was the most unthreatening, natural thing in the world. You assumed if they came for you, they’d come as a group, breaking in at night, blood and gunfire everywhere, as you were dragged out by your hair, being prepared to be their next victim. 

“You can stay right where you are,” you said as your eyes darted around the area, searching for some sign of an impending ambush. “What do you want?”

“Just to talk,” he said, holding both his hands up as if to convince you that he was harmless. He was far from harmless. 

“What…” You couldn’t fathom why he’d waste the time to talk to you. Was this some kind of big villain speech? Was he going to reveal his evil plan to you before whisking you away to your impending doom? “Why do you think I’d want to talk to you?”

“Now, child,” His smile stayed plastered to his face, but you saw in his eyes the bubbling frustration caused by your less than friendly greeting. “Is that any way to greet a guest?”

You just huffed and quirked your eyebrow at him. Guest? More like intruder, attacker, or better yet, monster. “I’ll say it again,” you hissed. “What. Do. You. Want.”

He snorted at your rudeness, only finding your venomous tone annoying rather than threatening. “I’ve come to ask you to consider joining the congregation of The Chant. I think it would be most beneficial of-” 

“Join you? Are you out of your damn mind?” You interrupted. “I’d sooner sell my soul to the fucking devil than join your fucked up little cult.”

“We’re not a cult,” His smile cracked at that and you could see the muscles in his cheeks twitch as he held back a scowl. “We’re an institution to better the lives of our members along their spiritual journeys.” 

“You kill people.”

“We do no such thing,” Mr. Anton said, his voice finally showing the frustration you could see in his eyes. His mask was cracking with each response from you. You imagined that this man was not used to being told no. “Those deaths were tragic and unfortunate, but they were not proven to be connected to us.”

“Well, I think the answer is clear,” you leaned in to drive your point home. “I’m not joining you.” 

“I wouldn’t be so quick to shut us out. Was it not but a short while ago that you were accused of the same thing we were?” He looked at you as if he had you right where he wanted you with that, but all you did was meet him with an eye roll. “You of all people should understand the… incompetence,” his face turned in disgust as he uttered the last word, “Of this country’s government and law.” 

“I don’t blame them for my arrest, I blame your group.”

“Us?!” He held his hands to his chest in mock surprise. “Whatever misunderstanding there was with your arrest, it was not caused by us. A rogue group of misguided followers, perhaps, but that is not who we are. You would see that we have been mislabeled as you had if you just took the time to get to know us.”

“Mr. Anton, you and I both know that I know your institution,” you put air quotes over the word, “very well. That being the case, why would you think I’d ever want to join? Why would you want me to in the first place? Remember, I know what happens to those who know even a small percentage of what I know. I’ve seen your handiwork. So why haven’t I ended up like one of them?”

He let out a small chuckle, shaking his head at the audacity you had in speaking to him like that. He knew you well, knew that you held all the secrets of his organization in your hand. He knew you were a liability, but he was glad to see you hadn’t figured out your purpose yet. “You’d be a powerful asset to our cause. The great religious scholar come to join The Chant. Surely, people would drop their negative view of us if a trusted expert in her field became an avid member of our institution.” His toothy grin was back full force, but rather than an inviting smile, it felt more like he was bearing his teeth to his prey. “And you do know more than most, I’ll admit, but that’s all the more reason to join us. Surely, if you are so enlightened, you’d understand our ways. You should understand why we do what we do.” 

“I’ll never understand why you brainwash innocent people and convince them to do horrible things.” Your hand reached for the door and you took one step back. This conversation was over. You already entertained it far too long. Without a doubt in your mind, you knew they’d come for you again, this time not so quietly, but that didn’t mean you’d go with him so easily today. “I think it’s time you leave.” 

“Please, if you could just give me-”

“She said it’s time to leave.” JJ’s voice came from directly behind the man. That’s when you both noticed her standing in front of the door steps, gun drawn and pointed directly at the man’s back. “So, I’d suggest you go now.”

The man turned slowly, hands up in surrender as he did. “I’ll go,” He nodded towards JJ, before turning his eyes back towards you. “But please consider what I’ve said.”  And with that he walked away, JJ’s gun not once lowering until he was out of sight.

“I leave for five minutes and you put yourself in danger.” JJ’s voice was strained as she lowered her weapon. “Why did you even open the door for that man?” 

You stayed silent, not really wanting to hash this out with JJ right now. What would you say? You’d tell her it was to protect her and she’d tell you it’s her job to protect you. That conversation has been overdone between the two of you. 

Giving JJ a brief look of frustration, you simply turn and head back inside. JJ followed behind you with an aggravated huff. Both of you immediately went to the window to peak and make sure no car was waiting outside on the street that looked suspicious. You knew JJ well enough to know that you both were thinking a surprise attack was on the table.

There were no signs of danger though, yet when JJ left the window you still lingered. He came to her house. He actually came to JJ’s house. This wasn’t good.

Your body was shaking and you hoped to god JJ wouldn’t see. The fact of the matter is, she was in danger. Never mind the delusional desires and dreams that man had for you. JJ had a huge target on her back, you knew that, but did she know just how much danger she was in? 

JJ watched as you stared out the window, your body tense as could be. Her heart ached for you. She misunderstood your fear. She vowed silently to never let you out of her sight again. Whatever needed to be done, she can do it from home. Whatever couldn’t, she’d phone in the team for help. If she told them that the leader of the very cult hunting you walked right up to her doorstep, they’d all understand. None of them would let you be alone after that, they all would be too protective to chance it. 

JJ was just going to be more intense in her efforts to protect you. As a result, you feared she would be more reckless too. You couldn’t let that happen. It was time to take action. You made yet another plan. The last time you left JJ’s side you failed miserably, but this time would be a little different. There might be a security detail on her place for you, but with finesse you could figure out something. Tonight, you’d leave. When she was dead asleep, you’d slip out. And when night fell, that’s exactly what you did. 

She might follow you. Your gut said this plan really would not work. It's been saying it for days. But you had to try, right? You had to see this plan through. It was different, you tried to convince yourself, it had to be different than last time.

When you slipped past the FBI car staking out your place, you knew where to go. You made your way to your place, your mind set on the gun locked securely away in your small, personal safe. You were going to do something crazy.

A/N: song inspo for this fic was Shallows (as the title suggests oops lol) by Daughter.

Taglist: @geekyandgay98 @daddy-carpenter @prettygirlsincorporated @mmmmokdok @demonicbaby666

#jennifer jareau x reader #jj x reader #jennifer jareau x you #jj x you #jennifer jareau #criminal minds #lost at sea series #reader insert #wlw #five-bi-five-mind

[simp-ly-writes]

Meet the Doctor pt.8

Pairing: Stardew Valley Harvey x Reader

Summary: The year is going by and what does Harvey think about the reader throughout it all?

Warnings: angst, mentions of drinking, implied personal relations.

A/N: almost there people, almost there I swear.

Masterlist | Taglist | edited.

Meet the Doctor Series (pt.1) (pt.2) (pt.3) (pt.4) (pt.5) (pt.6) (pt.7) (pt.8) (pt.9) (pt.10) you are here

The smell of coffee excites Harvey more than ever, allowing himself to get up every morning and start his day, it also reminds him of his farmer. He has noticed all your little marks of help throughout the clinic thanks to your green thumb, from your work on the plants both inside and outside of the clinic never had they looked healthier in the medical facility. 

Maru had seemed to be showing up less and less during the early mornings to help him prepare for the day since you started to come by, but anytime you had the chance to spend time together, Harvey would never complain about it. Though Maru compensated by sharing the later evenings taking virtual calls from neighbouring communities in order to get more income running through the clinic with the Doctor who was struggling to make ends meet. 

Yet as the weeks went by with coffee and muffins, he couldn’t help but feel that he and the farmer were becoming more colleagues than friends or the most valued something more that would never happen. He would never see you in the saloon throughout the weeknights and even barely on the weekend, your evening self seemingly disappearing into the depths of the Valley. This made Harveys imagination kick into hyperdrive as he thought of all the possibilities while twirling the wineglass he held at the bar. Maru by his side chatting to him like usual. 

Looking around he noticed that Elliot began to never show up at the Saloon as well, and that is all Harvey needed to think to even know what was going on between the two of you. Taking another sip of his drink, Maru and the Doctor fell into old habits. 

--

Weeks rolled into months; the schedule you and Harvey made never differing, at eight o’clock you would show up to help the clinic and chat to leave back to your farm at noon, if he was lucky he would find you at Pierre’s during the early evenings before rushing back to the farmhouse. 

Holidays rolled through the slows in time throughout this schedule and Elliot was always seated beside you at every communal gathering. Harvey saw you in that white flowy shirt paired with a flower crown that bloomed with the colours of your cheeks in the sun during your birthday at the saloon. He felt his heart flutter with the fake butterflies that flew and landed on your crown and painted atop your fingernails as he put that white dress to memory. He later sees Elliot looking at you fondly and seemingly doing the same while taking a quick glance to Mayor Lewis.

The fall scavenger hunt organized by Penny has the kids running and screaming, the noise echoing through Harveys apartment window as he looks down to see everyone setting up for the event. You wear a pair of embroidered overalls and a toque, he watches as Elliot snaps photos of you chasing after the kids, you all falling over into a stack of hay as he picks the pieces out of your hair and watches as your eyes close in the motions. Harvey finds himself ringing his fingers through his own hair and heading downstairs to talk with the community members, doing his best to keep his back toward you. 

Next comes the dance of the moonlight jellies, you wear an all too familiar red jacket that night on the pier as Maru huddles closer to him as they sit on the edge of the pier, feet swimming back and forth off the docks ledge. He can feel himself being transported back to the bar all those nights ago, and wonders to himself where all the time has gone, the wind wizzing past his ears; it screams. 

Soon the fall fair rolls around and you are walking with a large stuffed bear on your back as Elliot carries a basket of goodies from vendors far and wide, smiling ear to ear at your candy covered lips and sugar-hyped self to only change gears during the spirits eve maze as he hears you and Elliot go off into the distance of the spirits eve maze.  And the Doctor vividly remembers your soft smile to Elliots small but expensive gift on last years feast of the winter star, as he looks down at his own for you in his hands.

--

The smell of coffee breaks Harvey’s heart every morning more than ever, he struggles to get out of bed and ready for the morning, the smells reminds him of you and seeing you in that jacket that smells of the sea and green tea. 

As Harvey walks around downtown, underneath all the multi-coloured holiday lights that frame the tops of roofs and wrap themselves around every lamppost on his way to the museum; the holiday season in full once again. He thought that the resolve within himself would be grand enough to withstand this moment, but how wrong would he be…

This novel is dedicated to my love, Y/N and our shared writing nights that have ultimately made this book and me a better man. Elliot read the most personal of thoughts into a sea of people and here Harvey was, drowning.

--

The door chimes and the cold nips away at Harveys wet cheeks, fresh falling snow crunches underneath his boots as he wraps his green jacket tighter around his frame. Flashes back to that red coat cloud his mind as he makes his way back downtown and into the clinic as he prepares for appointments later that day in the room he met you all those months ago; tears falling and meeting his reflection in the clear tiles. 

To be continued.

Meet the Doctor Series (pt.1) (pt.2) (pt.3) (pt.4) (pt.5) (pt.6) (pt.7) (pt.8) (pt.9) (pt.10) you are here

#stardew valley harvey #sdv harvey #sdv harvey x farmer #sdv harvey x reader #harvey stardew valley #stardew harvey #stardew valley #stardew valley fanfic #harvey x reader #fanfic #fanfiction #simp-ly-writes #simp-ly

[soulsxng]

If my oc's were misinterpreted by fanon, pt 1:

Abbadon

First of all, he's big and intimidating, so you know people would go rabid with anything and everything sex-related with him. People might try to say he's a himbo even when he's not, because muscles--

Outside of that, he would have little to no personality (Because obviously quiet = no personality, duh. Alternatively/additionally quiet because dumb). He's pretty much just one of the demon prince's brothers. He doesn't exist without one of them around, and it's pretty much as a yes man.

Another part of the fandom would almost definitely fall into the "He likes fighting, and he's big and quiet, so he's probably secretly abusive and cruel!"

There would also be too many people that would ship he and Mammon together orz

Baphomet

Trauma? He doesn't know her, he's too silly-goofy for all that.

Male Only, unless it's for sexy things.

"Contracts? :3c " 24/7 with literally anyone he comes across.

Touchy-feely, so that means he's had sex with or wants to have sex with everyone. Alternatively that he's a creep that can't respect anyone's boundaries.

He and Enoch are together and love each other, or are going to end up together once they realize that they're "still in love"/have been in love this whole time, vs. Any time Baphomet does something bad, it's because Enoch is manipulating him. Actually, Enoch is always manipulating him.

Kei told me to add the "omgeeeeee, he does magic and he's mysterious, and that's sexy so he can do no wrong" thing

Ber

This one is easy. They'd give him the good ol' "Just a slut" treatment. Either severely downplays, or severely overplays his scheming and manipulativeness, because of this.

Also would probably be hated on a lot because he's not nice to most people, and isn't apologetic about it. Gets immediately stamped with the "Problematic" label, and if you like him, then you're problematic for it, too.

Those that do like him would probably also stick the "Love will fix him!" tag onto him, and would ship him with literally any buff, attractive male character that he interacts with for more than 5 seconds. The same people would also give him the "He's She's so misunderstood!" treatment.

People on both sides would also probably think that all of the big moves that he's made that have effected events to the point that Creation had to step in to help fix it, weren't actually him. He can't be that smart, he's definitely working for someone. Or was framed.

Darrow

Do I even have to do Aro's? We know it's all going to boil down to "big, sexy fox man". Oversexualizes him to the extreme, ruining any character depth that he might have. Probably makes him a lot bigger/more built than he actually is, for some reason???

He can do literally nothing wrong. He's lawful good and has absolutely no inner conflict with that ever-- they'd probably also erase his more trickster-y traits because of this.

His backstory would also be twisted by a lot of people because obviously nothing bad he's ever done was actually his fault!

There would also be the group that would lean into the whole "feral" thing though, and make that his entire personality. Because they think it's sexy. Probably so they can ship someone (probably Sachi) with him and spin it as "Oh, that's the one person who can make him snap out of it, he can't control himself otherwise!"

Enoch

He would be someone that people either love, or hate. There would be very little in between, and the two groups would probably be fighting about it constantly.

Another that would be overly sexualized. Sadly, a lot of people would paint him as immediately trying to jump into bed with anyone he met from the get-go, just to get what he wants and manipulate them.

A pack of smaller things that come to mind: Bro-con probably (especially with Ellie, Zi, and Ahki), "He's just like his dad", Only thinks about himself, A "pick-me" girl--

Enoch and Baphomet are together and love each other, or are going to end up with each other when they realize that they're "still in love"/have been in love this whole time, vs. Enoch keeps Baet around to manipulate him, and do his dirty work for him. Doesn't care about Baphomet at all.

Don't ask me why, but I feel like he'd get stuck in the "hates/belittles women" club?

#[Abbadon -extras-] #[Baphomet -extras-] #[Ber -extras-] #[Darrow -extras-] #[Enoch -extras-] #There's two more parts to this that'll post soon! #I was cringing while typing some of these and laughing during others asldkfna

[pxrxcxa]

Opposite Ends

Chapter Twelve | My girl

C1 | C2 | C3 | C4 | C5 | C6 | C7 | C8 | C9 | C10 | C11 | C13 pt 1 | C13 pt 2 |

Chapter Thirteen pt 1 is out now, enjoy Sunflowers x 🌻

Pairing | Eddie x Female reader 18+. Steve x Robin x Female reader platonic friendship

Series summary | Dustins older sister got brought into the group during the events of Starcourt mall, 3 months on she's in her senior year and the kids are starting high school. After everything that went down she feels that she has to keep them safe at all costs, that includes keeping them way from the charismatic 'freak' Eddie Munson that runs a club based on their favourite game. They've both hated each other since freshman year -with good reason-, but when keeping distance between the kids and Eddie means putting herself in the firing line, boundaries get blurred, intentions get lost & the heart speaks louder than the brain.

The story is told from both Y/N & Eddies point of view.

What to expect | Slow burn enemies to lovers, Angst - with a happy ending (fix-it-fic if you will), fluff & smut (in the later chapters). 18+ to read this story.

Series Warnings | Mentions of abuse, drug use, 18+ smut content

Chapter word count | 10 K Word Count

Chapter warnings | Light smut, vivid violent description

Authors Note | I literally had to go into work off shift to use my computer for this :( I'm really hating not having my laptop rn *cries violently* - anyways, I hope you enjoy it ;)

As always, any & all comments/reblogs are most appreciated - Thankyou, P. x 🌿

Y/N | March 1986

Drowning.

It was the only word I could think, the only thought that flashed through my mind as I swirled deeper under the crushing wave of darkness.

I’d drowned once before.

I was a freshman, and as someone who had recently joined the cheer team, I’d been invited to the exclusive end of year party as the upper classmen celebrated their impending freedom of adulthood. 

An endless supply of warm beers hand been handed out amongst the rest of my squad as we lounged around the water’s edge of Lovers Lake, sunbathing, and drinking in the looming enjoyment of finishing another year of school.  As the sun set deeper behind the horizon, and I sunk deeper into my cup, the idea of joining the older boys screaming in glee as they jumped off the nearby cliff face, seemed better and better the more my head clouded from the alcohol.

As I’d stumbled up to the rock face, spilling the dark liquor from my red cup as unseen hoots cheered me on in the nearing darkness, I’d hesitated on the crumbling edge as I peered into the intimidating depths below. A wolf whistle had distracted me, and I’d lost my balance, slipping off the slanted rock face and spiralling into cold water. I hadn’t felt it at the time, but I’d smacked the soft flesh of my forehead into the sharp jagged rock as I’d tumbled off it, the blood and my hair blinded my vision as I plunged into the freezing abyss.

The silence was deafening as I over spun, kicking out against the heavy water. It was too dark and suffocating to tell which way was up, the fall had knocked away what little breath I’d had in me and the hit to my head had disorientated me further than the alcohol already had, as the panic set in, smothering blackness wavered in my blurred vision. Every nerve ending in my body was screaming for some sort of relief as the darkness won out.

As I came to, relieved laughs had been yelled far too close to my ear as someone wrenched me up right and smacked my back to bring up at least half of the lake up out of my lungs, as I sat shivering on the cold sand surrounded by drunk seniors, someone else slapped a fresh beer into my shaking hands and gave me a thumbs up. I’d tried to hide my terror behind a hesitant sip.

But the violent fear that choked me as I nearly drowned, was nothing compared the thrill of trepidation that floored me now.

I was vaguely aware, through the layers of thick haze, of large, warm pulsing fingers pressing painfully into my arms and shaking me roughly. It was dark when I opened my eyes, eerily as the darkness pushed in on me from all sides. Something unnatural that lingered in the air sent an electrified tingle up my spine as I shivered, slowly turning in a whole circle as I stared out into the blackness. The pressure of the unseen pair of hands was still there but lessening as a ringing screeched through my ears.

My breathing hastened as heavy footsteps echoed from all corners in my vision, fighting against the loaded clock chimes that sounded in the distance. I swung my head around wildly as tears sprung to my eyes and my entire body shook on the edge. Terror froze me to the spot as my name reverberated through my skull, silent but deafening as it was spoken into my mind, pounding into the soft flesh behind my aching eyes.

I gasped and snapped my eyes shut as an image of the ‘flayed’ me shot across the distant void space in front of me, crawling backwards on her snapped knees and hands. Even though those that had actually fallen victim to the fleshy monster, hadn’t exactly been so grotesque in real life, my nightmares, and paranoid feelings towards what happened last summer, manifested in the horrors that plagued me during my waking hours until they appeared more terrifying than anything that the Upside Down could spit out at us.

I know what you are

Like my name, the animalistic growl didn’t speak out loud but rather to me, straight into my soul as if it had unwarranted access to parts of me I’d hidden even from myself. I wanted to scream as I felt the unfamiliar presence lap at the festering sores in my mind, tearing through them until it found one it liked and put it on display for me to relive.

I’ve seen you. The real you

My breathing turned to gasps as I felt it move behind me, its presence felt larger than a skyscraper as the world around me as I knew it, changed. If it hadn’t been plaguing me since the fire, I would have thought the scene around me was an actual memory.

As it was, it was my dream – or more accurately, nightmare – that had ruled my life and every decision since it had first woken me with a petrified scream. Billy was spread wide as the monsters’ sharp tentacles stabbed in and through his torso, soaking his white sleeveless shirt with gut wrenching crimsons stains. A chorus of agonized screams erupted from the distance, and as I recognised my own amongst them, my stomach turned.

Too much.

As Billy’s own dying scream rained painfully down on me, my eyes travelled along the length of the deadly monster arms, shivering as I watched them come closer and disappear behind me.

No not behind me, from me.

Before the nightmare could completely take on its usual cruel twist, I snapped my eyes shut and spun around as I watched blue eyes melt into deep brown ones, short wavy hair growing out into long curls and Billy’s taught muscles deflating into lean skinner ones.

It was all too much. Not him. Please Not him.

I wasn’t sure when my begging became available for anyone but my own previously safe thoughts, but the creature responded.

I’m coming for you

For a split second, black rage overpowered the crippling fear as the reminder of what I had to fight for, what I would never stop fighting for replayed through my mind.

The warm embrace of Eddie’s laughter, his sweet secret smile as he handed me my mix tape, the first night he’d snuck into my home, his fragrant, intoxicating scent that was signature to him only, the day at his house when he’d hesitated on the word that I’d been waiting to hear for months – it all flashed through me in a moment like a movie reel of the happiest moments of my life.

But even that wasn’t enough to hold me from shattering into pieces as I turned to face whatever terror haunted me. 

A humanoid monster with black skin and movable vines that protrude from its entire body, resembling a desiccated corpse missing imperative parts of its body, was covered in distinctly creepy details —veiny skin, jagged edges, toothy appendages.

My stomach rolled and my knees buckled, I wasn’t strong enough to form the words out loud, but whatever psychic connection allowed it into my mind, seemed to work the other way.

What do you want?  The scream was impressively deafening inside the walls of my skull pounding with blood. It cocked its scaly head to the side as its dead eyes appraised me, it’s tone almost – but not quite – cordial.

I want you. To join me

Its words didn’t make sense as they jumbled my thoughts, but the monster took my silence for defiance, and it turned angry. It raised a large, deformed hand as its claws inched towards my face, tilting my head back as its sharp nails pinned against the sides it. My breathing became laboured, inhaling the rotting stench of its flaky skin as it stepped closer.

Max might have escaped me this time, but I’ve got you

I choked out puffs of breath as I was lifted to the balls of my feet, my eyes rolling back as excruciating pain set my network of nerves throughout my entire body on fire.

I’m coming for everybody

Its slimy hand crowded my vision as the mixed faces of my loved ones and fleeting memories spurred past, mixing in with the awful end that rushed towards me like a freight train.

I’m coming for him

Eddie.

My Eddie. The danger was here with me, and Eddie wasn’t. The safest place for him. I’d always known I’d die at the cursed hands of Hawkins, ever since I’d first been told about the upside down, deep down, I knew.

As certain death – or something heinously horrendous that the thought made me violently ill – loomed ever closer, I expected regret and anguish over not being able to fulfill childhood dreams, or fear at the unknown or remorse over unsaid words to those that meant more than anything.

But all I felt was a warm, comforting peace as I let my eyes flutter close and succumbed to the pretence of the only thing that brought me consolation.

Because maybe in the end, I got what I wanted.

I got Eddie.

And a short life lived with him was worth a thousand times more than any lengthy one devoid of his warmth and goodness.

I dug deep through walls of stone to dredge up the feelings I had vaulted away after I’d sworn to myself to protect him, I’d fought as far as I could, it was up to our friends now to save him.

For whatever remained of my life, I would spend it with him.

A soft smile played on the corner of my mouth as the feeling of Eddie’s strong hands wrapped around me, came back into focus.

My headache pounded heavier than ever before but like he always had, Eddie’s soft voice broke through the gurgling from deep within the chest of the monster and I tightened my eyes, focusing on the sweet octaves of Eddie’s voice as it wove through the sonnet of my favourite song. My smile deepened because I knew bliss must be close, he’d never sung it to me before – I doubted Eddie had paid much attention to learn it off by heart as he struggled to keep an interest in genres’ he wasn’t super passionate about.

Even though he loved teasing me about my ‘awful music taste’ he’d still let me listen to it in his van sometimes when he’d drive us home from school, and that’s how I must have imagined him singing it now because this surely was my own figment.

I scowled as Eddie’s hands tightened painfully around my middle, shaking me against something solid as the beauty of the song reaching its peak was interrupted by panic seeping into his voice, my name laced and dripping in sheer terror as his urgency broke through the veil.

“Y/N” My neck snapped back painfully as Eddie’s hands moved to my shoulders and shook me beneath his pinching fingers, slamming me against his chest as sweat dripped off his brow.

I collapsed against his quivering frame as my legs betrayed me, feeling the last vibrating hum leave his centre as his singing ceased and a relieved gasp left his lips. I slammed my eyes shut as a wave of nausea washed over me, breathing in the earthy scent of him as I buried my face against the soft fabric of his shirt, heaving sobs began to make me shake as I clasped my fingers around the collar of his shirt.

Eddie crushed me to him as hysterical cries ripped out of my throat, switching to a desperate plea of his name as he traced a careful touch up and down my back, muttering into my ear over and over that I was okay.

“It’s alright, I’ve got you.” He pressed a messy kiss to the sweaty strands of hair plastered to the side of my head, pulling back slightly but tightening his hold around me. Panic was flamed in the taught lines of his forehead as his eyes searched mine, I tried to keep them guarded as I focused on evening my breathing, not ready or wanting to tell him what I’d seen, concentrating on the surreal feeling of being back grounded in the boat house and away from grey decaying monsters, seemingly – at least for the moment - alive.

A flurry of high-pitched words screamed through the casted aside walkie, making me jump in fright under Eddie’s firm hold. He crouched down between us to snatch it off the weathered floorboards beneath us, bringing it close to his lips as he answered Steve’s hurried question.

“She’s okay, I’ve got her.” Eddie stepped closer as he wrapped his arm around my waist, his concerned dark eyes boring into mine. “Yeah, I thought to so, my singing wasn’t exactly oscar worthy, but I guess it worked enough.” He shot me a half smirk that made my heart flutter, even under the heavy threat of imminent danger and death, Eddie’s natural carefree attitude still didn’t fail to place a small shaky smile on the corner of my lips.

The warmth radiating from him burned into my side comfortably as I clenched my fingers harder into the fabric resting against his chest, refusing to let go of him as he rubbed small circles against my back. The very real feeling of him caused a last slow sob to bubble in my throat as my eyes burned with fresh tears.

How could I keep him safe?

It wasn’t a question anymore, I’d felt what it would be like to lose him, I wasn’t willing to be a risk to Eddie’s safety for much longer. I smashed my lips together as he glanced back down at me to hide my thoughts as my resolve hardened.

His eyes flickered across the slight waves bobbing above the surface in the hole of the middle of the room, following the movement as he listened intently to Steve, his tone had turned apologetic.

“No, it’s okay man. You guys take care of Max, we’re good here.” Even after everything that had happened in the past few days, everything that Eddie had seen and been told, he’d accepted me back into the pattern of ‘we’ just as easy as I’d fallen into it.

His eyes softened as I reached up to caress the stubble of his jaw line, swallowing the lump in my throat as I pushed away the thoughts that ate at me, Eddie caught my hand as it brushed past his cheek, holding it to his nose as he inhaled against my tingling skin.

“You’re pale.” He broke away suddenly, linking his fingers through mine as he tugged me off from where we both leaned against the back wall. Only then, as my head swam dangerously and my eyes crossed, did I realise how weak and fragile I felt. Eddie ran his eyes over me doubtfully, in a flash he swung my arm that he still had in his grip, over his shoulders as he wrapped his free hand around my waist to pull me close.

Eddie ignored my protest as he herded me towards the slightly ajar door, nudging it open with the toe of his dirty sneakers.

“We have to stay hidden Eds.” I raised a trembling hand to shield my eyes from the sudden onslaught of the blaring sun.

“You need to eat something” He fixed his grip on me as he practically half carried half dragged me up the uneven slope towards the darkened doorstep of Reefer Ricks house.

I shook my head as another rush of nausea passed over me at the thought of what Eddie considered ‘food’.

“Water then.” He argued, flashing a worried look at me as the rest of the blood drained from my face and I lolled heavily against him.

Eddie | March 1986

The back door of Rick’s place that led down to the waterfront of Lovers Lake, banged against the panelled wall loudly. I shot y/n a quick glance at where she laid peacefully against the aged pillows of the rickety couch before rushing over to snap the door shut slowly, cringing as it creaked out into the morning air. I spied a couple of elderly neighbours swaying lazily on a rusty fishing boat in the middle of the glistening water, nursing their poles as they glanced over in our direction. My hand hesitated on the door handle as jealously floored me, what I would have given to be enjoying the weekend in a similar fashion, as opposed to harbouring as a fugitive for a crime I did not commit.

The reminder had me slinking away from the door and pulling the curtains shut tighter to avoid drawing anymore attention, dousing us back in filtered darkness as dust particles swirled in the sunlight that snuck through the slack in the window curtains. Her breath fanned across the pillow where she had her hands stuck under her chin, her lips falling apart in a relaxed pout as I leaned against the doorframe to watch her.

It was silent for a moment before a muted moan reverberated in the space between us, I froze as I waited for another to confirm I hadn’t imagined it. After a long held in breath, y/n muttered again.

My name.

My dull heart ached as my stomach churned, was she dreaming of me? In the months I’d spent with her in my arms, she’d never once spoken in her sleep. I wondered now if it was a pleasant dream, doubtful considering the horrors we’d both suffered over the past few days, but a man could dream to, right?

Her hand shot out across the grizzly fabric to clench around thin air as her brows knotted together.

“Eddie…mmm. M’sorry.” A mixture of anguish and affection rushed through me, rooting me to the spot as I waited for more. I’d been wrong and angry the first night when I yelled at her that she wasn’t who I thought she was, because truthfully it didn’t matter to me that she’d lied, in her own opinion, to protect me, deep down at her core she was good and kind and selfless, my girl.

Nothing she ever did or anything that happened would ever stop her from being my girl.

I jolted as she shivered, spurring across the space between us with light, hurried footsteps to tug up the withered blanket that pooled around her waist to tuck up over her shoulders. She smiled and sighed my name once more in content, like she sensed me near as she bundled down gratefully under the covers.

I brushed the stray hair from her eyes, letting the warmth of her breath send a longing shiver up my spine as I forcibly tore my hand away from her, arguing with myself that right now wasn’t an appropriate time to give into my more basic urges. I spun on my heels and headed to the barren kitchen to play house husband as a distraction.

The top draw clattered as I wrenched it open a little too roughly, my frustration seeping through as my male needs distracted me. I slammed it closed in annoyance as it revealed only rusted metal utensils and moved on to the cupboards beneath.

“Nope.” I muttered under my breath as I snapped those closed as well, the overhead shelf above the oven homed dusty cans of mixed soups and pastas. I snorted as I pictured y/n’s face when I presented her with a bowl of mushed food with absolutely zero nutrients.

“You’ll do.” I muttered as I snatched a cylinder of ‘SpaghettiOs’ and slammed down a semi clean pot onto the top of the stove, turning up the gas to high heat. It sloshed around in the metal as I bit my tongue between my teeth in concentration, no reason this shouldn’t be the best on-the-run meal y/n had ever had. She was sitting cross legged against the couch pillows as she rubbed her eyes sleepily when I sauntered back into the living room, balancing the two shared bowls of the food in one hand as I brought the walkie to my mouth in the other. I glanced away as she stretched her arms above her head with a yawn, the thin fabric of her shirt exposing the dip just before her pant line, a different kind of hunger churning within me.

She looked up with a with a sheepish smile and accepted the bowl I handed her without complaint, mouthing the word ‘thankyou’ as I spoke.

“Hey, Dustin, this is Eddie the banished and your sister with her mister, you there?” The radio clicked out as y/n let out an small, amused giggle, slurping up the food with haste. I tried not to let my relief show too much at the fact she seemed much better than yesterday, looking far more alive at least.

Silence

“Dustin, can you hear me?” The spoon froze in her hand as her eyes flashed up to meet mine and I turned on the spot, trying not to let the lack of a response send me into a panic.

“Dustin?” I dragged out, my chewing slowing as my stomach dropped, y/n let her spoon clatter against her bowl loudly.

“Earth to Dustin?” The walkie crackled promisingly.

Hey it’s Nancy

“Wheeler! Hey.” I shouted back happily, a little loudly as y/n winced. I switched the walkie to my other hand as I strutted over to the window, peering out into the blinding sun that filtered through the leaves of the swaying trees.

“Um, we’re gonna need a food delivery.” I glanced down at the mushy carbohydrates at the edges of my bowl as my stomach growled in distain, y/n shared a similar displeased look as she set her own half eaten meal on the coffee table in front of her.

“Like really soon, unless you want me going out into the world.” My empty threat was cut off as Nancy’s voice flowed back through and y/n shot me a frustrated glare.

No. No, no, no. Don’t do that. Stay where you guys are, and we’ll be there as soon as we can.

“Yeah yeah. Listen, um… can you pick me up a six-pack?” The couch groaned in protest as y/n rolled her eyes and shot up from it, coming to stand beside me.

“I know it’s stupid as shit, drinking right now.” My words were meant for y/n as her shorter frame stood flush against my chest to stare up angrily at me.

“But a cold beer would really calm my jangled nerves.” Y/n hung her head back as I smirked at her.

Hey, I’m gonna have to call you back.

“No don’t you dare- Wheeler? Wheeler?” Y/n shot me her own gleeful look as the line cut out and my face screwed up.

“You really think drinking right now is a good idea, Eddie?” She cocked an eyebrow at me as she sighed, crossing her arms. I gulped and looked away from her as she pushed her breasts up even closer to my face, my cheeks reddened as my eyes flashed back down without my permission.

“I think it’s a great idea y/n.” And truth be told I did, I could think of a hundred different ways a night of drinking with y/n could end right now, and I was a happy man in all of them.

She sighed and smacked my chest lightly like she knew was I was thinking. “I’m gonna take a much-needed shower.” I clenched my jaw as I watched her hips sway as she disappeared around the corner, trying very hard and failing, to keep my thoughts away from her as I heard the creaking tap turn on and the steaming water rushing down against the floor of the bathtub. With a grunt I turned away and readjusted my jeans against the growing pressure inside of them.

The sun was setting, making the frayed ancient furniture of Reefer Ricks living room look like it was on fire as they shone in the orange glow. I had my back pressed against the far wall across from where y/n sat cross legged again on the couch, absentmindedly toying with the hem of her jacket as she stared out the dirt crusted window above the kitchen.

I could watch her for hours like this, semi relaxed as she was lost in her own thoughts, unaware of anything else around her. She chewed on her bottom lip hard enough to make me jealous as a flash of anger flared in her eyes and her hand came away with threads of fabric she’d torn from her jacket.

She glanced up to meet mine as a laugh slipped past my tight lips, shaking my head as I flicked a non-existent speck of dust at her.

“I just hate this. The waiting.” She half growled, launching up to the middle of the floor as she wrapped her arms around herself, unsure what she was hoping for. She glared daggers at the silent walkie sitting on the coffee table between us.

“So impatient.” I grinned, loud enough for her to hear me but she ignored my teasing.

“It’s almost night, and their last update was hours ago. They should have found something at the creel house by now.” She let her arms hang by her side limply as she pouted again.

“No news is good news.” She sighed at my cryptic response, scowling at me as I held my hands up in innocence.

“We have to do something Eddie, we can’t just sit here and wait for the danger to come and find us. It’s too open here.” Her eyes filled with a distant look as she moved to the window, gripping the ledge of it as she peered into the encasing darkness like the monster was out there lurking right now. Hell, maybe it was.

I leant forward slightly, pulling the full bottle of whiskey that I found rummaging through Ricks nightstand like a creep, from behind my back, letting it balance on my knee as I cleared my throat. I half expected a snarky comment or disappointed shake of her head, but y/n’s face was blank as she considered my offer.

“Fuck it.” With quick strides she crossed the thin carpet, snatching the bottle from between my fingers and folding herself down next to me. I watched her from the corner of my eye, pressing my lips together as she pushed into my side to make herself comfortable as she stretched her legs. My skin beneath my jacket burned from where she’d rubbed into me.

“Easy there sweetheart.” I smiled, reaching out for the bottle as she tipped it back dangerously.

“I think I’m old enough to say when I’ve had enough Munson.” She snapped, flexing her hands wrapped around the lip of it as she glanced at me like I had razor teeth. Her face was filled with unrelenting fear as she relived something I was not privy to.

“That’s not why, I just want some left over for me.” I flashed an uneasy grin as I waited for her to laugh at my joke, the sweet sound didn’t tinkle into the air, but the corners of her lips did lift and as palmed it off to me.

We sat in a loaded silence for a few minuets as we passed it back and forth, watching the shadows crawl across the floor and wiping our mouths on the backs of our hands as we shivered at the burning liquid dripping down our throat. I held out as long as I could before the muted sounds drove me crazy, with the warm tingling of the alcohol finally kicking in and filling me with a new confidence, I broke the thin wall between us.

“You know, this is usually a lot better with games.” I held up the now half empty bottle in the dwindling light as she scoffed.

“Games? Like what?” She humoured me and offered a small smile as she nudged my shoulder with her own, it sent a thrilling zap up my arm.

“Well, how about truth for truth?” I let my eyes drop as hers became guarded.

“I’ve never heard of that game.” Her tone was even warier than her face as she took a hesitant sip.

“I just invented it.” I shrugged, that earned me a booming laugh as she shook out her hair, her cheeks reddening.

“Okay fine. You first.” She insisted.

“What happened with Carver?” I held my breath as I waited for her response, suddenly unsure if I wanted to hear her answer.

Her reply was quick and flowed easy like someone telling the truth, like she was reciting a fact rather than creating a story. “After I was in the bathroom, I had to leave. Clear my head. Him and his team found me after the game, walking laps on the field. I thought it would help clear my head. It didn’t. Anyways when they offered me their celebratory drinks, I figured if fresh air wouldn’t do the trick, getting blind drunk probably would.” I shook my head at her, not knowing what I was more pissed at.

“You looked like a mess when I found you.” The words slipped past without permission, and my stomach clenched painfully as she glanced at me with knowing pity.

“I’d tripped like a hundred times. Pretty hard to see through the tears Ed.”

“Carver’s a dick and a liar.” She promised, sitting forward so I was forced to look at her. Something further released inside of me, relaxing me to the point that breathing no longer took effort. The bottle went slack in my hand resting against my leg as she glanced up expectantly at me through her thick lashes.

“What do you wanna know?”

“Chrissy… you said it was just drugs, was that true? Nothing happened between the two of you?” I’d wanted to scoff at her, be angry with her for thinking so little of me and that I could have moved on so fast and easily, but as I glared back down at her I could see my fault, because as new tears brimmed in her eyes and her lips quivered, anguish washed over me at the fact that if there was ever a doubt in her mind, then I had clearly failed in showing y/n how much she meant to me.

I slid the bottle into her hands so I could reach up to cup her cheeks between my stern fingers, holing her with a feather light touch, being ever so careful not to break her as I turned her face towards mine.

“It’s you. It’s only ever been you. It’s only ever going to be you.”

The tears overflowed and ran down her pink cheeks as her eyes fluttered closed. I let the rough tip of my fingers wipe away the stray drop that met the corner of her lips, wishing it was my touch on her mouth instead but not wanting to push it too far. I’d seen and touched intimate parts of y/n that she never would, but still I felt like I had to start from the beginning. My lips had just formed around the question when she pulled back sharply, sniffling, and wiping her nose with a humourless laugh, bringing the bottle back to her lips.

I let my hands fall back to my lap as I watched them clench.

“On the field.” She cut me off, spinning to the side and sloshing some of the dark liquid down her front, she barely noticed as she faced me with a frenzied, pleading look.

“It killed me, Eddie. To say those things, I know I already sort of explained this, but I need you to know. I – I…” She sighed, leaning back and tilting her head against the wall as I sat up, wanting to rip the words from her mind as she held them back from me. I slipped her cold hand into mine as I traced a soft circle pattern against it. At my touch, her eyes flashed open again.

“You were the best thing that ever happened to me Eddie, it was like my life was this grey, meaningless repeat of the same day – no, nightmare – until you came along. Even when we weren’t friends – “She stumbled over the underestimation of the word as we both shared a knowing laugh, no doubt her mind flashing to same angry memories we shared over each other.

“My point is, nothing had any meaning before you Edward. You – you aren’t like anyone I’ve ever met, you’re good and kind and make me laugh and I’ve never felt safer than when I’m with you.” She choked up slightly as my throat burned, unable to meet her eyes as her words made my heart sing and practically leap out of my chest. She took another long chug of the whiskey like she needed it to continue.

“I never meant to hurt you or lie to you or drag you into all of this.” She gestured her hand widely around the empty room, staring daggers like this Vecna character was lurking in the shadows behind the couch.

 “I think I kind of got myself into this one y/n.” I scoffed, taking my own deep scull as I shook my head with self-deprecation as y/n trembled with anger.

“No Eddie, it’s me. I would have dragged you into this at some point or another. I’m cursed.” I knotted my brows together and readied myself to argue before she shot to her knees, tossing away the bottle as she kneeled in front of me and trapped my face between her hands.

“But I promise, I swear to you on everything that after we get out of this... I’m never going to put you in danger again.” Her face shone with, albeit, a more fiercer look than the one she had on when we met in the woods near school and I’d planned to sneak over to her home for the first time, but the trace of bad news still brewed under her pretty features, exactly like last time.

I couldn’t do it, not again, I wasn’t losing her again. Not after I just got her back.

With her pupils blown wide and her lips parted as her sweet, alcohol filled breath washed over me as her chest heaved in the dim light, I couldn’t help myself.

“Can I kiss you?”

Y/N | March 1986

After coming face to face with what was stalking me, threating everyone I loved and killing teenage Hawkins High students, it wasn’t a hard decision as I realised what needed to happen to keep Eddie safe, what I’d always known but just chosen out of selfishness to ignore.

Eddie would be in danger for as long as I was apart of his life, pretending that I didn’t love him and trying to stay away of my own accord, had failed. He’d been dragged into it all anyway. The others, my brother, Steve, and Robin, it wasn’t the same, most of them knew about the upside before I had, we were past the point of return of trying to save ourselves.

But it wasn’t too late for Eddie.

I knew what I had to do, but that thought didn’t make it any easier as I physically felt my heart slice into delicate pieces as my resolve hardened.

It’s why I didn’t hesitate as Eddie’s intimate and soft-spoken question hung in the heavy air between us. If I didn’t plan on letting my presence besmirch Eddie’s life for much longer, then I figured I may as well indulge myself right now while I still could, my throat closed around my answer painfully as the thought how much more it was going to hurt after this hit me like a boulder.

I nodded as the heat rose to my cheeks, gasping as Eddie’s hands wrapped around my thighs and pulled me into his lap. He gripped the sides of my face as I tried to crush myself to him, breathing in deeply as a whine built in my throat, his thumb ran over my cheekbone as he sweetly and softly brought his lips to mine, moulding against me with hurried intent as I responded with a moan, melting against the hard lines of his chest.

A mixture of salty tears that belonged to both of us helped our lips glide together easily as I ripped my mouth away from his, moving to the soft under skin of his jaw as he moaned my name, twisting his hands in my hair as I bit at his neck, trapping, and suckling at the skin until I left raw marks in the shape of my mouth, making Eddie shudder beneath my touch.

I felt his excitement grow as a pressure struggled against his jeans and his cheeks filled with embarrassment, avoiding my eyes as I pressed my smiling mouth against his exposed collar bone.

“First time?” I teased, rocking my hips down onto his hard cock.

“I just don’t want to push this – you.” He clenched his jaw under my touch but tightened his hands along my hips as they rocked back and forth, locking away his emotions as his guarded stare met mine, a rant of unsaid words glaring behind his heavy brows.

My heart clenched as I read the pain behind his eyes, even now after all of the reassurance and mounds of begging for forgiveness, my words on the field still stung deep.

Without breaking my eyes from his, I wrapped my hand around his wrist and guided his fingers under the fabric between my legs, a satisfying shiver rolling through me as his lips parted and his eyes visibly widened at the wetness there, all for him.

“I want you.” The sultry demand was dripping and laced with need as we both clashed together, all tongue and teeth, as pure desire overpowered me. Our moans and sounds of flesh smacking together could have burned holes through the walls as I threw my head back, loosing myself in the feeling of Eddie’s fingers working away at my release, his soft finger tip flicking faster over my clit as the moans tumbling from my mouth became shorter and quicker.

I shot up from Eddie’s lap like an electric current had zapped us both apart as the close sound of doors slamming broke through our heavy breathing, we were to distracted in the feeling of each other’s’ bodies and missed the growing sound of their engine.

Eddie shoved past me in panic as he vaulted himself over the back of the couch as he gripped at the window, cowering beneath the sill as he tried to stay hidden. His hands – reflecting slightly in the setting sun from my slick that coated his fingers – flexed angrily as he swore.

I was still frozen on the floor, half turned as I leant up from the floor. My blood ran cold as Eddie spun back to me with a frenzied look in his eyes, his face still flushed as the dark marks from my teeth showed no sign of fading along his neck.

My stomach lurched as Eddie ripped me to my feet, pushing his hand against my lower back to urge me forward as I planted myself and demanded an explanation.

“Carver and his cronies.” Eddie choked out, unyielding terror beginning to seep through his voice, the urge to protect him overwhelmed me but he was staring down at me with panic and concern like his safety was the last of his concerns, he had swerved in front of me to shield me with his chest, blocking me from view of the window as his fingers dug in painfully.

“Boat shed.” Eddie half growled, fed up with my icy hesitation as he dragged me across the quicky darkening living room floor towards the back door, my stomach dropped as I spotted Jason, Andy and Patrick storming down the uneven brick stairs straight towards where we were scarcely hidden, menacing crowbars swinging at their sides as they flexed their hands around the cold metal.

My worst fear was dressed in black tie, it looked like the inevitable man hunt had originated at a funeral. From the deranged, lifeless look in Jason’s eye’s, it seemed they had finally put what remained of Chrissy, to rest.

The alcohol that had warmly clouded my thoughts before, tangled my feet together as pure adrenaline shot through me and tightened my muscles, a metallic taste swirled on my taste buds as I roughly shoved at the back of Eddie’s jacket, yelling out a stream of profanities in a hushed tone as I tried to figure out a plan. He flattened himself to the side as he shoved open the creaking wire door, touching my lower back lightly as I shot out past him and down the stairs, slowing down at the water’s edge as I turned back to make sure he’d kept up with me. I flinched as his closeness caught me off guard, blocking out the slim slither of light that peaked through the curtains of the swaying tree branches.

“Shit shit shit, what are we gonna do?” I screeched, pressing my face into my hands as I considered our options. Eddie pulled out the walkie from inside of his vest, and I let out a deep relieved sigh that he’d had the forethought to grab it.

My stomach rolled as I watched the dark shadows pass the dirty windows of Ricks place, chewing at my raw nail beds as I sent a prayer out to anyone that might hear it that we wouldn’t be noticed anytime soon, I crouched down next to Eddie as the wind picked up and he brought the walkie to his mouth, spit flying between his teeth as he clenched his jaw.

“Hey Dustin, you there?” My teeth chattered and I jolted, burrowing down further against Eddie as clanging resounded out from the open front door of Ricks place.

“You remember us, right?” The radio line dropped out with a crunch as we were met with stone cold silence.

“We might be in a bit of trouble here. Wheeler? Anybody?!” He slammed the antenna down angrily as my eyes slipped past him to an aged fishing boat that barely looked big enough to hold one person. My nails dug into the leather of Eddie’s jacket as he followed my stare and nodded, shaking under my touch as he waved his hand out for me to go first.

With a quick glance at the where Jason and the others tore Ricks place apart as they searched for Eddie, I ran in quick little leaps across the wet grass, my shoulder burned as I let it reach out behind me, refusing to let go of him for even a second, afraid that without my eyes on him, he’d disappear into the oncoming darkness.

The water rippled against the head of the boat, making it sway and throb lightly as I lifted my leg to take a careful step, Eddie’s hand flashed out to support mine as I slipped against the wet metal flooring, helping me take a seat against the strip of wood baring down the middle of the boat. Dark stains splashed across Eddie’s jeans as he pushed us off from the shoreline, jumping in beside me as the boat rocked dangerously beneath us. I shivered into the night cold air as the fresh moonlight broke through the heavy clouds, shining a luminescent blue onto Eddie’s stressed face as he tried to form a smile and shoved a heavy oar into my hand.

I sucked in my cheeks and leant over the side, grimacing against the resistance as I dipped my paddle in the dark water and swung back, with Eddie’s combined strength we shot forward into deeper waters, rocking us in our seats.

I bit back a yell as an angry scream floated out across the lake’s surface, bouncing off the swaying trees the surrounded the edges. I watched a muscle in Eddie’s jaw clench and his eyes blow wide as we both spun around at the sound. Jason and the others were gathered on the shoreline, stripping off their clothes as they shouted out more profanities at the sight of us.

Eddie’s eyes snapped to mine for an instant before he shot up from the seat behind me to tear at the cord attached to the ancient motor.

I held my breath with him as his motions swayed us, ripples of miniature waves spiralling out from where drifted into larger circles.

Silence

“Come on, Fuck.” I gripped the wood besides my thigh painfully as Eddie swore under his breath, laughing at the dim hope I had that it would start. I glanced at the boys as they leant down to untie their laces, listening to Jason’s curt demands as he snapped at them and convinced them to swim out after us.

My legs shook like crazy as I stared at Eddie’s forearms tensing with each long, purposeful stroke as he spoke and begged to the engine like it wasn’t an inanimate object. I jumped to my feet as Jason ran towards to waterline, sending up loud splashes of water as his eyes trained on me, a revealing ferociousness flaring in them as his lips pulled back in a snarl.

Eddie’s sneakers kicked up and dislodged the layer of dirt the coated most of the surfaces as he flashed past me, yelling out a jumbled stream of directions as he didn’t pause for breath, shoving the oar back into my trembling hands as he leant over the helm, paddling furiously.

I was slow to join him as I refused to tear my eyes away from where Jason shot through the water with easy strokes like a shark as he closed in on us. A white foam filled the choppy waves that pulsed out from the boys naked chests.

“Eddie!” I cried out, stumbling away from the ledge of the boat as Jason’s pale arm reached for it.

Eddie shoved me the side roughly as he pushed forward, shielding me behind his shoulder as he brandished the dripping oar. “Hey stay back man, Stay back!” His eyes were unfamiliar to me as a rage filled strength seemed to overpower him.

All at once the water seemed to settle as a loaded silence filled the air in between our heavy breathing and slow laps of water slapped against the metal sides and the bright moon broke through the mixed clouds, shining down on the horrors beneath.

“Hey man we’ve almost got them.” Eddie’s arm lowered slightly like he already knew, the boat levelled beneath our feet as all sounds of the natural nature around us, vanished.

“Patrick?” Jason failing arms traced across the water as he shook out his hair and spat out accidently swallowed water. The younger and slower boy, Patrick, was gasping for breath as he swung his head around widely, his pupils blown wide as he searched for something that the rest of us couldn’t see or hear.

If I’d blinked, I would have missed it, Patrick’s head shot under the water entirely, disappearing under its black depths as the blank reflective surface calmed almost immediately. I turned to stare at Eddie to see my own panic and confusion reflected in his gaze as his eyes swept the water.

I shut out Jason’s shouts as my body tensed, the seconds ticking by at an agonizing pace as I waited for a glimpse of something. Cold droplets splashed against my cheek and damped my jeans as a roar echoed around us and Patricks body shot up from the water, hanging limply in the air with his eyes rolled back as Jason’s call died on his lips.

I didn’t need to see the colour drain from Eddie’s face or his muted gasp of ‘no’ to know that this was what he had struggled to describe about Chrissy as he held back tears. My stomach clenched as the first sickening snap rang in my ears before the boat lurched under me and Eddie’s back moved alarmingly closer to my face, slamming into me, and knocking my breath away as we both tumbled as one into the freezing water, plunging deeper as the cold bit into my skin and pounded on my ears, drowning out the next quick snaps as Patricks body dropped back into the lake a few paces from me. Through the air bubbles that ruptured around me as I kicked back towards the distorted image of the moon reflecting through the wavering surface, I watched the bloodied, empty eyes sockets and cracked slack jaw of Patrick disappear into the black water.

Eddie | March 1986

I had to remind myself to slow my pace again as y/n swiped a branch out of her way with a frustrated sigh, tripping over undergrown roots as she swore.

“Sorry.” I mumbled, stopping in my tracks, and reaching for her elbow as I held the low hung branch away from her scratched face. Her clothes were nearly dry now, same as mine save for my t-shirt plastered to my skin, hidden from the blaring sun under my leather jacket. We’d been walking – well running- all night, sweat dripping down the napes of our necks as we shared very few words between us. There was an alight moment after we’d dragged ourselves to the shoreline, soaked to the core and shivering against the mud before she nudged me, and we took off running before we stopped out of breath to figure out what the hell our next move was.

Y/n’s face had fallen as I patted my wet, empty jacket pockets, shaking my head with my lips pressed into a thin line as she asked about the walkie.

“I just got lost in my thoughts. I won’t go so fast.” I tried to muster up a small smile to soften my curt tone as she glanced up at me through heavy lashes, reaching up to squeeze my cheek as I let my eyes flutter close at her touch.

“I get it.” She murmured, tracing the thin membrane of skin across my cheekbone and across my nose, letting it rest at the corner of my mouth as my heartbeat raced.

Ridiculous, even here, on the run from supernatural monster alike, I couldn’t keep my thoughts off of her. The flash of Jason’s teammate body being snapped, burned behind my lids as I pulled away from her hand, running my own through my knotted locks as I spun away, looking up through the green canopy of treetops to the blaring blue sky as a flock of birds flew overhead. The woods were teeming with insect life as the groaning and ticking filled the silence between us as y/n chewed on the inside of her cheek.  

“We need to contact the others. Tell them what happened, find out what they know.” She just started to suggest sneaking into her place when she was cut off by a resounding screech and rock clutter that scared a squirrel scampering up the trunk of a nearby tree.  

“Come on.” My words were lost as I reached forward to take her warm hand in mine, linking our fingers as I dragged her through the tight woven branches behind me as I took off towards the tell tale sounds of a construction site, my idea taking root as a glimmer of hope twisted in my chest. I was back to square one, racing through the woods as I ran away from some unseen force that was snapping kids apart.

Except this time, I had y/n with me, and even though it shouldn’t have, because the thought made my chest warm and sent a sturdiness through me, I was grateful for it, but the stakes were higher this time. I might have had a sense of survival, but I would happily lay my life down for hers if it meant I could get her out of this.

I should have been the one putting on a brave face, coming up with ideas to save the day, but as she tightened her hand around mine and broadened her steps to keep up with me, her face full of determination, I couldn’t help being filled with awe.

I’d reverend her before, but seeing her like this now, lips parted as she panted, brows narrowed as her eyes darkened towards any sound that scurried underfoot. She was a force to be reckoned with, and for a moment, as her probing gaze met mine and the sunlight bounced across her face, deepening the colour of her eyes, I knew things would be okay as long as I had her with me.

I squeezed her fingers as the bush thinned, exposing piles of dust that clouded the hi-vis shirts of workmen that carried loads twice their weight and shouted back and forth at each other over the sounds of whirring machinery. I crouched down behind a berry bush, pulling her with me as I watched the movement of the construction crew dart between the open beams of the new building. There was a digger twice as tall as me and a port-a-potty close by, I shot down further into the shrubbery as a laugh echoed and beamed closer, one of the younger guys I vaguely recognised from the ‘Hideout’ had slung off his belt, leaving it along a bench as he went to relieve himself.

Before she could argue, I dropped y/n’s hand, shooting out into the open as my sneakers crunched against the gravel, with a quick look up at the group of men huddle around something in the middle of the concrete slab, groaning and rubbing their bald heads as some of them pulled their hats off on frustration. I bit down on my tongue as I freed the radio from its pocket, with a grin of success I took off running back to the woods, slamming into the portaloo as I stumbled. I left the angry, muffled shout of ‘hey’ from inside of it behind as y/n yanked me down beside her.

“Eddie!” She hissed, digging her nails in. “don’t do that again, you can’t just go rushing off.” She threw her hand around wildly before letting it fall to her lap as I held up the radio between us with a smirk.

“What’s the station?"

“Dustin, can you hear me? Wheeler?” I stared up at y/n’s slightly quivering form as we waited for a hopeful response. I’d offered her a seat along the aged mattress under Skull Rock that was littered with beer cans and cigarettes and had seen more teenage antics than King Harrington himself. She’d shot me a disgusted, disbelieving look and opted to stand against the smooth rock face, watching the shadows linger across from her.

“Eddie! Are you guys okay? Where’s y/n?” She jolted at Dustin’s voice, running to my side as I pumped my fist in success.

“Nah man, pretty goddamn far from okay.” Y/n pressed her lips together as I rubbed mine.

“Where are you guys?” I could hear a mixture of voices and a strange clicking as y/ns face stared back at me with the same questioning look.

“Skull rock. Do you know it?”

“Uh yeah.” The line dropped out as someone spoke over little Henderson.

“Hold tight. We’re coming. We’re coming.” It crackled back up as Dustin let out a hurried and rushed assurance before the static spiked and then silenced completely.

I let the radio fall between my feet as I rubbed my eyes, shielding it from the hammering sunlight as I felt y/n move beside me.

“Ugh, more waiting.” She groaned, pressing her fingers against her temples as she rubbed slow circles, her hand shot up to hold a finger in the air at me as my snarky remark died on my lips.

‘And before you say, ‘so impatient’, how do you suggest we pass the time Eddie?” She raised her eyebrows at me sarcastically as a slow grin spread across my face.

Disbelief and shock made her drop her hands as I nodded my head at the mattress, cocking my brow in a suggestive question as she stared back at me, resting birds took flight quickly as the sharp octaves of her laugh reverberated across the trees, slinking down my back to warm my core as I watched her relax with a small smile on my face.

“Let me know if I need to sing again.” Her smile sobered up as it slid from her face at my words, paling as the clouds shrouded together heavily over head, blocking out the warming sunbeams as engulfing shadows slid between the cracks of Skull Rock.

Chapter Thirteen Part one

➢ Eddie Tag List } @dotslabyrinth @chanaaaannel @lem0nb0iii @xcarabear @projectcampbell @munchabunch @grungegrrrl @sammararaven @ches-86 @alinepichi @halbhohehalluzination @kalalikalas @thetrashqueen23 @bruh-tato-chap @sagittariughs @c0rroded-coffin @averagemisfit03 @eddiesgffff @churchmuffins @mrsdollardog @ms1oftheboys @pearlsyeaaa @hanahkatexo @bex-tk1 @thatonecluelessbitch @briasnow-blog @aftermidnightwriting @blue-eyed-lion @@figmentofquinn @brittanyyydamnit @edsforehead @ick90

Copyright © 2022 by P.McCann.

All Rights Reserved.

#eddie munson #eddie munson fan fiction #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson x reader #eddie smut #eddie x reader #eddie munson headcanon #eddie stranger things #eddie munson one shot #eddie x y/n #eddie slow burn #eddie munson slow burn #eddie enemies #opposite ends #eddie fanfic #stranger things 4 #eddie fluff #eddie munson smut #eddie imagine

[revenant-coining]

Thewellrypt

[pt: Thewellrypt /end pt]

[id: a rectangular flag with a dull green background. in the center are three semi-ovals, each one being part of an oval that is taller than it is wide, with each semi-oval being smaller than and positioned lower on the flag than the last. from largest/tallest to smallest/shortest, colors are dark green, black-green, and black. /end id]

Thewellrypt: a chokrypt gender connected to the game “The Well” by Yames. this gender may be connected to lovecraftian body horror, depths, spirituality, and/or religion, but doesn’t have to be.

etymology: the well, (chok)rypt

for day 1 of @radiomogai’s event; for the prompt: “chokrypt”

not a xenogender, please don't tag as such!

tagging; @thecoffeecrew404

[id: a blue-to-light blue-to blue rounded line divider with a break in the center, with a "blue raindrop" magikarp from magikarp jump in said break. /end id]

#🪼 creations #thewellrypt #gender #neogender #chokrypt #liom #mogai #category: genders #radiocoining #event creations

[narcosfandomdiscord]

narcos october masterlist i

This masterlist is for days 1-10 of the @narcosfandomdiscord's october prompt event, which you can read about here and join in!

For days 11 onwards, check out the second masterlist and the third masterlist.

(Note: character x character indicates a romantic/sexual relationship; character & character indicates a platonic one.)

October 1 — Day of Firsts

Create a fanwork about a canon character you’ve never written about/used before.

↳ fanart by @tofuwildcard — Javi smoking, digital art

↳ Claro Que No by @drabbles-mc — Chepe x gn!Reader, 462

↳ Waiting Red by @narcolini — Isabelle x Chepe vampire AU, 600

↳ Depth Over Distance by @proceduralpassion — Mika & OC sibling backstory, 2.2k

↳ For Old Time's Sake by @garbinge — Carrillo x Reader, Steve and Javi & Reader, angst, 3.5k

↳ In the morning by @artemiseamoon — Marta x Amado established relationship, 2.8k

↳ Vengeance For Me by @kesskirata — Gustavo & Tata angst, ficlet

↳ what we do now by @ashlingnarcos — Feistl x Van Ness post-canon, 1k

↳ Tu cómplice by @hausofmamadas — Mayo x Benjamín pining, 2.8k

.

.

October 2 — “Porque No Los Dos?” Day

Create a crossover for the original Narcos show and the Narcos: Mexico show, featuring at least one character for each.

↳ Looking On by @drabbles-mc — season 3 og DEA & season 2 mx DEA, unite! 3.5k

↳ How Do You Do This Shit For Fun? by @proceduralpassion — Walt & Javi crossover, 1k

↳ Late nights, early mornings by @artemiseamoon — Javi & OFC, Mayo x OFC, 1.8k

↳ two tests by @ashlingnarcos — Carrillo & Trujillo & Calderoni ficlet

Anything involving polyamory, ex: a fic about somebody who has two or more partners.

↳ Aggressive Negotiations by @kesskirata — Javi x Steve x Connie, 1.1k

.

.

October 3 — Day of Music

Create and post a playlist for fic/wip of yours OR your favorite episode and explain why each song resonates for that fic/wip or episode.

↳ Three playlists by @rerorero-my-cherry — for Ramon x OFC fic Sola con mi Soledad

↳ Playlist for episode 2.1, Salva El Tigre by @artemiseamoon

Put your favorite playlist on shuffle and whatever song comes up first, that’s your prompt.

↳ Tainted by @drabbles-mc — Carrillo & Steve angst, 3.1k

↳ I need you tonight by @artemiseamoon — Amado x OFC, 1.1k

↳ on your mind by @narcolini — Javi x gn!reader ficlet

↳ Amado fanart by @tofuwildcard

↳ Foldin' Clothes by @garbinge — Steve Murphy x F!Reader, 3.2k

↳ Promise by @proceduralpassion — Carrillo x OFC smut

.

.

October 4 — Day of Conflict

Many people seemed to combine both prompts for this day! Ambitious day.

Anything involving a fistfight or a gunfight.

Quote prompt: “What the fuck is wrong with you?”

↳ Who You're Dealing With by @drabbles-mc — Steve & Javi & OFC, 3k

↳ Luna de Lobo by @artemiseamoon — Ramón x OFC, Barron x OFC

↳ Country Store Cherry Chocolate by @garbinge — Steve Murphy & Reader (his sister), 1.9k

↳ Unwritten by @proceduralpassion — Carrillo x OFC, 1.1k

.

.

October 5 — Day of Visual Art

Visual fanworks: post a screenshot, meme, gif, gifset, video, or other non-fic visual fanwork.

↳ a glitchy Pachito by @tofuwildcard — fanart

↳ NUGGETS OF BENJAMAYO by @hausofmamadas — gifset + commentary

↳ If Narcos Had A Group Chat by @proceduralpassion — video of groupchat texts

↳ If Narcos Had A Group Chat pt ii by @proceduralpassion — video of groupchat texts

Create a fanwork about a character interacting with a piece of art (e.g. buying decoration for a new home, stealing a piece, hitting on a stranger at a gallery, creating art themselves, etc)

↳ Things I Should Have Said by @garbinge — Javi x F!Reader, 2k

.

.

October 6 — Day of International Relations

Write non-English language fic.

↳ Dos Opciones by @proceduralpassion — language: Spanish, Maria Elvira x Miguel, Maria Elvira x OFC, ficlet

↳ ¿Qué? by @ashlingnarcos — language: Spanish, Eduardo x OFC, ficlet

Use a random country picker and utilize that country in your work in some way: a character is from that country, a food from that country shows up, there’s international politics, etc. You get two rerolls if you don’t like the first or second country you get. If you get the United States, reroll automatically.

↳ House Special by @drabbles-mc — county: Japan, Walt x F!Reader, 3k

↳ Lespwa fe viv by @artemiseamoon — country: Haiti, Chepe x OFC, 1.3k

.

.

October 7 — Day of Darkness

Make something centered around non-death dark topics (we have a specific death day already). Morally or emotionally dark topics/themes.

↳ The Oil Has Run Thin by @proceduralpassion — Walt x OFC ficlet

↳ Twenty-Four Hours by @drabbles-mc — Carrillo & gn!Reader captivity 1.4k

One-word prompt: Blackout.

↳ Control pt 1 by @artemiseamoon — Verdin x OFC smut, 1.6k

.

.

October 8 — Day of Light

A day of pure fluff: anything insanely, unambiguously, self-indulgently, luxuriously enjoyable.

↳ Moving Day by @drabbles-mc — Steve x Connie fluff, 1.1k

↳ Happiest I've Ever Been by @proceduralpassion — Steve x Connie fluff ficlet

.

.

October 9 — Day of Gay

Create anything devoted to an LGBTQ+ character.

↳ Watching Time by @garbinge — Chepe x Pacho ficlet

↳ Bisexually-lit Dina by @tofuwildcard — fanart

Create anything with a queer and/or trans original character or reader insert.

↳ Down in the 305 by @drabbles-mc — Steve x M!Reader

↳ Would You Kill For Me, My Love? by @proceduralpassion — Pacho x OMC ficlet

.

.

October 10 — Day of Tough Shit

Write a fic whose exact wordcount is divisible by 500 (500, 1000, 1500, etc).

↳ The distance between you & me by @artemiseamoon — Calderoni x OFC post-divorce 1.5k

↳ Four People You Meet by @drabbles-mc — Carrillo x Juliana, Carrillo & Martinez, 500

↳ Talking Heads by @ashlingnarcos — Arellano family humor, 500

↳ The Bungalow by @proceduralpassion — Amado x Reader, 500

Make a fanwork in a medium you’ve never used before. If you make GIFs, write something. If you write, draw. Etc. As long as it’s uncharted territory for you!

↳ Hi, I'm a Slut (Amado's Version) by @tofuwildcard — fanvid

.

.

↳ narcos october masterlist ii with prompts from day 11 onwards

#narcos fanfiction #narcos imagine #narcos mexico fanfiction #narcos #narcos mexico #narcos mexico imagine #narcoctober

[mammons-lover]

Unexpected Arrival: Pt.4

Introduction: This is the story of the obey me brothers and an unknown child who appears on their doorstep. tw: children, and parenthood. Pt.1 Pt.2 Pt.3

As the first rays of morning broke through the curtains, Lucifer walked to Mammon's room and down the steps of Mammon's bed. What he discovered there stole his breath away: Mammon, the Great Mammon, holding Amir in his arms, radiating parental love and care. Amir slept on Mammon's chest, little fingers wrapped around the fabric of Mammon's shirt, their breathing in sync as they slept soundly.

With a heavy heart, Lucifer approached them, gently rousing Mammon from his slumber. "Mammon, it's time to wake up," he murmured, his voice tinged with regret.

Mammon breathed in frustration as his hold on Amir tightened automatically. "Just five more minutes," he said, his eyelids jerking open as he saw Lucifer's presence. But when the fog of sleep cleared, he was startled awake, Amir still in his arms.

"What the hell...?" Mammon's voice trailed off as he looked down at the sleeping infant, confusion clouding his features.

With a soft sigh, Lucifer reminded Mammon of their upcoming encounter with Diavolo, asking him to prepare himself and Amir for the day ahead. Mammon reluctantly moved from the bed, Amir clutching to him like a lifeline. After a brief breakfast, the brothers left to Diavolo's, prepared to face whatever obstacles were ahead at the castle. Barbatos welcomed them with a kind grin and took Amir from Mammon's arms with experienced ease.

"Diavolo is waiting for you in the garden," Barbato's informed them, his expression unreadable as he disappeared into the depths of the castle.

With a sense of trepidation, the brothers made their way to the garden, where Diavolo awaited them with a smile that faltered upon seeing Amir's absence.

"Where is the child?" Diavolo inquired, his tone laced with concern.

Lucifer explained that Barbatos had taken Amir, prompting a nod of understanding from Diavolo. But the concern lingered in his eyes, casting a shadow over their meeting.

As the brothers relayed the events of the previous night, Diavolo's expression grew increasingly somber. "We must exercise caution," he cautioned, his voice grave. "The presence of an angel in the Devildom is cause for concern, and we must tread carefully until we uncover the truth of Amir's origins."

Diavolo gave a serious nod and swore to seek answers from the celestial realm, his dedication unflinching in the face of doubt. As the conference came to an end, the brothers couldn't help but feel a sensation of dread wash over them. 

#obey me shall we date #obey me imagines #obey me #mammonobeyme #lucifer obey me #beelzebub obey me #belphegor obey me #leviathan obey me #asmodeus obey me #satan obey me

[tryslora]

What I'm Reading Wednesday...

On the Duck Prints Press reading server, it’s What I’m Reading Wednesday where we all share what we finished in the last week, what we are currently reading, and what we think of these books.

I figured hey, why not bring that to the rest of the world for myself. Because I love yelling about my current reads. And I’ve always got several things in motion at one time, between physical, audio, and ebooks, plus things I’m reading for specific reasons.

Here’s the summary from the last week in visual format (the actual discussion is behind the read-more):

Fiction

I am currently reading Many Drops Make a Stream by Adrian Harley (from Duck Prints Press). There are so many things to love in this book. The world building packs so much into such a small space. The culture clash between human and shapeshifter is wonderful (and Harley’s shapeshifters truly have a culture all their own). I thought it was going to be a quick read because it’s short, but the language and depth of information have me going slower and savoring every word. That said, I’ve also reached the point where I want to take it in faster, so I find myself spending a little extra time every time I pick it up, just to get a few more pages!

Manga & Graphic Novels

I have one manga and one graphic novel in progress.

I’ve been reading The Complete Elfquest, volume 1 by Wendy & Richard Pini for a little over two weeks now. We have several of these volumes, and my intention is to read one chapter/issue a night, so I am able to savor them slowly, but also get through them. Reading this first volume is like coming home into a fandom from childhood. The first chunk of it was also collected in the original Warp Graphics compilations, and I can’t remember how often I read those back in high school. I’m reaching the parts now where I probably only read the individual issues once or twice, so it’s familiar, but not to the point where I’m like oh yes, I remember gazing at that panel for hours. I still love these elves, and this story, and I cannot wait to get home each day and be allowed to read a chapter. I’m looking forward to when I reach new-to-me material.

I watched the 24 episode anime The Apothecary Diaries and I wasn’t ready to let it go when it was over, so I started reading the manga by Natsu Hyuuga and Nekokurage. I finished volumes 5 & 6 this past week and am currently reading volume 7. I have the remaining already published volumes waiting for when I’m done with this. I adore Maomao and Jinshi, and am incredibly excited to get to the point where canon moves past what is in the anime. That said, getting to revisit events I already watched on TV and linger over what was said and the exact expressions has been soooo good. (And yes, I know the light novels also exist and will be rolling into those in ebook form after the manga; I might be a tad bit obsessed).

Audiobook

A while ago I thought “I should read some TJ Klune” so I checked the library list I had for audiobooks, and the first of his Extraordinaries trilogy was available in audio. I listened to it. I was addicted. I’m now on the third book—Heat Wave—and I find it very very hard to put it down. I can’t listen while working, only while commuting, walking, or doing chores—things that don’t require me to actually think so I can multi-task. But hey, it’s a GREAT way to get me to do my PT since it means fifteen minutes more of audiobook listening! Nick, the POV character, has ADHD and I flail a lot over pretty much everything he thinks and does. I love every character in this series. I love how Klune is using superheroes as an allegory for the queer experience and for racial issues, but at the same time, is actually addressing those issues explicitly. I both want to listen faster to find out what happens, and linger so it doesn’t end.

Ebook

I have been reading Wayfinder by CE Murphy, which is the second in a duology. This is a romance, yes, but it’s another fun culture clash book, this time between humanity and faerie, and I am so here for that. Murphy is an author I used to read a lot from, and I’m trying to work my way through her back catalog slowly because I’ve always enjoyed her style. Accessible and fun. This series is about a woman who has always been able to hear lies (a Truthseeker), and how her talent develops, and how she works with the faerie kingdoms to try to help them (despite some of them not wanting help, and the original situation not being the one she’s actually needed for).

Non-fiction

I have been working my way through three non-fiction books.

One is A Year of Zen by Bonnie Myotai Treace. I had been looking for a journaling prompt book, and decided to give this one a try. I made the difficult decision to write directly in the book itself, then the additional decision to let myself fail if needed. So if I don’t get to answer a prompt on a day, I just answer it the next day. One prompt per day. It’ll take me more than a year to go through it, but that’s okay. The idea is to have me think and write a short paragraph every day, and not feel guilty about messing up. It’s working surprisingly well. Learning to let myself fail has been a big part of my process this year, and hopefully I am learning to let go of some of the anxiety about things needing to be matched and rigid.

The one I am stalled on right now is The Happiness Trap by Russ Harris. It was recommended as a book that therapists like to use for themselves, not merely recommend to their patients, and it reminded me of the radical acceptance I’m supposed to be practicing (and apparently am, despite myself, according to my therapist after she listened to me). The problem is, it has exercises (doesn’t everything?) and I stalled out because I didn’t have time.

Time is a theme, y’know? And that’s what happened with the last non-fiction book. I’ve been working through The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron, taking it as a self-guided 12 week course. I’m currently on week 5. However, I did a week of just doing morning notes before I really got started, then I took a week off when everything went haywire in my schedule because of the power outage. So it’s been about seven weeks so far. This week, as I worked on exercises, I found myself really digging in to my emotions about this book. And in the end, I decided that while I can see the value in some things, the book itself is giving me more anxiety about everything to do with my writing, while at the same time making it impossible for me to find time TO write (while following the advice it gives). So. I am no longer doing it as a course, with exercises, but I will finish reading it. And if an exercise appeals, I’ll do it. It’ll still take time, because I’ll probably still read one chapter each weekend, but I am already feeling WAY less stressed and I only made this decision last night.

So…

That’s it for me! What are you reading?

#what i'm reading wednesday #duck prints press #reading #books