#we arrived there at like 10pm and we left 8 the next morning | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ikeromantic · 3 years

Text

First Day

This is an Ikemen Sengoku coffee shop AU. Approx 1700 words. Nobunaga, the owner of Azuchi Cafe, hires a girl to work in his coffee shop alongside his other oddball employees.

Pastry Chef and little rain cloud: Ieyasu Tokugawa

Head Chef and irredeemable flirt: Masamune Date

Dining Room Manager and rule-master: Hideyoshi Toyotomi

Barista and most popular kid in your class: Ranmaru Mori

Barista and coffee disaster: Mitsunari Ishida

Accountant and walking bad-boy vibe: Mitsuhide Akechi

I have never written a coffee shop AU and I have no idea what I'm doing.

Nobunaga unlocked the back door at 3am. It was so early most people would still call it night, but he enjoyed the peace and quiet at this hour. As if he were the sole living human in a world of stray cats and blinking traffic lights.

He flipped on the lights and began morning prep. As the owner of Azuchi Cafe, he didn’t need to be the shop opener, but he was the kind of man who’d never ask his employees to do something he wouldn’t do himself. This meant he often worked from opening until close, cleaning the kitchen at 10pm. It was something he was proud of, even if it was exhausting some days.

Ieyasu arrived a few minutes later, along with the morning shipment. Fresh fruit, cream, some new coffee bean varieties, and other items he stocked daily. The blond was quiet as he helped unload. Not a morning person, not by a longshot.

Once the crates were inside, Ieyasu made a beeline for the espresso machine and had two cups on the counter before Nobunaga completed his inventory check.

The blond downed both cups and then got started in the kitchen. He was too smart for a cafe job - easily one of the best bakers Nobunaga had ever met. And this cafe was blessed with two, though the other man was a polar opposite of the silent, serious Ieyasu Tokugawa.

As if thinking of him summoned him, the back door swung open and in swaggered Masamune. “Good morning!” His voice was loud and vibrant, as always. He never needed caffeine to feel awake - Masamune was naturally caffeinated.

“D’you have to be so loud?” Ieyasu glared.

“Do you have to be such a grouch?” Masamune raised his one eyebrow. His other eye was covered with a pirate-style eyepatch. The look wasn’t just for effect. He’d lost his left eye to a childhood illness, but that hadn’t dampened his spirit or enthusiasm.

Ieyasu held up a dough covered middle finger in response and went back to making croissants.

Masamune put a hand to his heart. “Such cruelty.”

“Stop bickering and start cooking.” Nobunaga tried to sound stern but couldn’t help the little smile on his lips.

The two of them did, though the grumbling and sniping never really stopped.

While Ieyasu handled bakery items, Masamune was in charge of the grill. Hot sandwiches, soups, and whatever else he decided to put on the menu. Nobunaga had given up trying to restrain him. The man was a genius cook, and whatever he made sold, so it made sense to give him his head.

Akechi showed up next. Mitsuhide was an accountant by trade, with a law degree besides. He didn’t technically work at the shop, but he did the books and didn’t charge much for the work. Nobunaga wasn’t sure why he spent so much time at the cafe, but he’d become a fixture. Showing up before opening to do Azuchi’s books and then sitting in the dining area, working on his laptop for hours.

“Anything I should know about,” Nobunaga called, before Mitsuhide disappeared into the cafe office.

“If there was, I’d tell you. Probably.” Mitsuhide gave him his trademark smile, sly like a fox.

“It’s that probably that worries me.” Nobunaga frowned. He didn’t actually believe Mitsuhide would sabotage him. Not after so many years as a client. But with that man, you never quite knew where you stood.

Akechi shrugged. “I can’t think of a reason not to - but you never know.” He disappeared into the office, and soon the only sound from that room was the clacking of a keyboard.

The sky to the east was beginning to lighten, the stars fading from view. It would be time to open soon. As if on cue, Mitsunari showed up with Ranmaru in tow. They were the baristas, taking orders, making coffee, and serving the sit-down diners.

“Isn’t it a beautiful morning?” Mitsunari said this to Ieyasu’s back as he passed him.

The blond snorted. “It looks like every morning. Literally, exactly the same.”

“And every morning is beautiful.” Mitsunari Ishida smiled. “I am so lucky to work with such wonderful people. It will be a great day. I can feel it.”

Ranmaru laughed. “Absolutely. Just ignore old grumble-pants here. We are going to have an awesome day.”

“I am not old,” Ieyasu snapped.

“You are compared to me!” Ranmaru was the youngest in the crew, and he liked to remind the others about it.

“That’s enough. Get up to the front and prep the display. Both of you.” Nobunaga pointed toward the front counter.

Ranmaru gave him a pouty look, but did as he was told. Despite his penchant for causing trouble in the kitchen, he was great with customers, and pretty reliable.

Mitsunari didn’t seem to realize he’d been in the middle of the bickering. He just smiled and followed Ranmaru to the front.

That one, Nobunaga thought, was dangerous. At first impression, Mitsunari Ishida seemed like an airhead. Cheerful to the point of being vapid, and clumsy as well. But he could take orders faster than anyone else, remember which customer had which preference, and quote the menu without a glance at the board on the wall. He was great, so long as you didn’t ask him to pour the coffee.

At opening, Hideyoshi finally sidled in. He was the dining room manager, in charge of the servers, and everything on the front end. Nobunaga trusted him implicitly. Most cafe owners had to worry about theft and inattention from their cash-handling employees, but not him. Not with Hideyoshi Toyotomi at the counter. That man was a veritable saint, if sometimes a little melodramatic about his service.

“I know you told me I didn’t need to be here until 10, since you open. But I couldn’t let you handle everything alone.” Hideyoshi’s version of ‘good morning’ as he tied his apron on.

Nobunaga sighed. “You are my closing manager, Hideyoshi. You’re going to be stuck here until 10 or 11 tonight . . . and you realize, I do have employees here, helping, right?”

Toyotomi nodded. “Sure, sure. But extra hands always help with morning rush, right?”

“Right. And that’s why I have a new hire coming in at 8.” Nobunaga sighed.

“A new hire?” Mitsunari’s violet gaze lit up. “Will I get to train them?”

“Don’t be stupid,” Ieyasu grumbled. “We want them to make coffee, not learn how to dump the pot on the floor.”

“Stop being so mean,” Ranmaru sniped back, defending Mitsunari.

“Hey, hey! The new employee isn’t gonna get trained by any of you. Clearly, the boss is going to put them with me. To pass on my culinary genius.” Masamune’s one eye sparkled.

“No, no, and absolutely not,” Nobunaga said, raising his voice. “Hideyoshi and I are going to train them. If the lot of you don’t terrify them into quitting on their first day.”

And that was the end of that discussion. It was 5am and the door opened. The steady stream of customers kept everyone busy for the next few hours. Lattes and cappuccinos, americanos and macchiatos, and decaf for those in denial. The flow began to slack as 8am approached. Most people were at work now, coffee in hand.

Clean-up started in the kitchen, and Hideyoshi began on the dining room.

The glass front door opened at 8am sharp. The new hire walked in. This wasn’t Nobunaga’s first time meeting her, but he still felt a twang in his chest as she smiled brightly at no one in particular.

“I hope I’m not late!”

Hideyoshi eyed her up and down, nodding to himself. Flat shoes, cute but practical. Hair pulled back sensibly - stylish, but not overdone. Professional clothes, fitted and comfortable. He hadn’t been part of the interview but he was feeling pretty positive about this candidate. He gave Nobunaga a nod.

“No, you’re right on time,” Mitsunari replied, leaning on the counter. His angelic smile was fixed on her.

The impact was obvious. One did not face the pure, focused joy of Mitsunari and not feel it. She blinked for a moment, stunned, her cheeks flushing. “Oh. Well that’s good, right?”

“Sure is,” Ranmaru said, coming around the side of the bakery display. He wiped his hands on his apron and held one out to her. “Welcome to Azuchi!”

“Hey, that’s my line,” Nobunaga grumbled.

“Yeah, but I’m cuter when I say it.” Ranmaru’s cheek reply got a chuckle from Masamune.

The one-eyed chef came out from the kitchen to observe. He wasn’t looking for whatever qualities Hideyoshi had, but what he saw made him grin. “Well, lass, I’d say welcome again but that’d make me look like an idiot. How ‘bout I help you put on an apron and show you around the place?”

“Again, my line,” Nobunaga said tiredly.

Ieyasu poked his head out from the back and sighed heavily. “Great. Another fluff head to train. Look, when you get bored listening to these idiots, come find me in the kitchen. I’ll try to teach you to bake. I’m sure you can manage a simple recipe. Probably.”

The girl looked unsure how to respond. She finally shrugged. “Yeah, ok! I’m here to work, so whatever you want to teach me, I want to learn.”

“You’d be better off learning how to keep the books,” said an amused voice behind Ieyasu.

The girl’s eyes darted up as Mitsuhide came out from the back. “Not that I’m hiring. I don’t do internships either,” he continued. He stepped out from behind the counter and closed in on her like a stalking cat. His golden eyes slid down from her face, over her chest and hips, down her legs, and back up, slow as syrup. “Though I can think of some reasons to make an exception.” He handed her a business card. “For when you tire of this service job.”

“Ah, thanks?” She glanced at the card and by the time she looked up again he was gone.

“Everyone, get back to work. I’m handling the new hire. You’ll all get a chance to train with her. I want her to work swing, so she’ll need to know a little of everything.” Nobunaga clapped once.

The workers all got back to it, though not without plenty of backward glances.

Hideyoshi handed the girl an apron. “Good luck!”

#ikemen sengoku #ikesen nobunaga #ikesen ranmaru #ikesen mitsuhide #ikesen mitsunari #ikesen masamune #ikesen ieyasu #coffee shop au #fanfiction #fanfic #otome guys #otome #fluff

71 notes · View notes

escapewithbts · 3 years

Text

“Just Benefits?”(Part One) - Jungkook

————————————————

You stretched out your arms and shielded your tired eyes from the morning sunlight peaking through the curtain. Upon sitting up you noticed the space in the bed next to you was empty. You wrapped the sheet closer around your almost naked body as it had gotten colder without another human lying next to you radiating warmth. You rubbed your eyes and yawned before grabbing your phone from the nightstand. An array of text messages were waiting for you.

7:34am From Jungkook: Hey y/n

7:34am From Jungkook: Sorry I’m not there, I had an early meeting

7:34am From Jungkook: Stay as long as you like

7:45am From Jungkook: Also I just want to say I had a good time talking with you last night

You locked the phone without responding and pulled off the covers. Then you got out of the bed and searched the floor for something to put on over your underwear. You only had jeans and a blouse, so you opted for Jungkook's oversized black t shirt from last night and a pair of his shorts. They were massive on you but you were comfy. You picked up your pants and shirt off the floor and folded them neatly on the bed as memories from the night before appeared in your mind;

8:10pm from Jungkook: I had such a rough day. Want to come over?

8:10pm to Jungkook: I’m at work

8:11pm from Jungkook: Ok, after?

8:11pm to Jungkook: Sure. I’m off at 10.

8:12pm from Jungkook: I’ll be at the dorm, text when you get here so I can buzz you in

You sighed and clicked off your phone. This was the third night this week he asked you to come over and it was only Wednesday. You weren't necessarily complaining, it was better than going to your own apartment where you lived alone, but you couldn't help but wonder why he was asking so much.

You guys kind of had an unspoken arrangement; to spend the night at each other's places when the other felt stressed or in need of companionship. You would have sex, of course, sometimes cuddle a little bit after, and then go on about your days the next morning.

You had met through one of your close friends, Kim Namjoon. He was in the same band as Jungkook, the famous k-pop group BTS. You had known Jungkook through RM for years now, you wouldn't have said you were friends, but you were always friendly and liked hanging out with him in a group. This part of your relationship with Jungkook however was relatively new.

It had all started one night when you were hanging out at their place with all of them, watching movies and drinking... maybe a little too much. All the other guys had gone to bed, leaving you and Jungkook alone and tipsy. Jungkook had always been shy, just like you, so when the two of you ended up kissing on the couch it took you both by surprise. One thing lead to another and before you knew it you were both naked in his bed. The sex was good, no great, so great in fact that you both knew you wanted to keep having it. And that's what lead you to this unspoken agreement you had. That first time was months ago now, and the two of you hadn't even talked about the future, nor the present for that matter. You were enjoying each other's company and not putting any kind of label on it... but you knew that always seemed to end up in a mess.

After work, you drove straight to the boy's dorm, notifying Jungkook of your arrival via text. You pressed the call box and waited for the front door to open. Jungkook answered after just a few seconds. He was wearing an oversized black t shirt and boxers, his long black hair was tousled about his head, and his dark brown eyes looked tired, his cherubic face slightly puffy. You had to admit, he looked very sexy, yet also adorable, and it caused you to feel butterflies in your stomach. You ignored them.

"y/n..." his big smile and your name in his soft voice made your knees weak, "I'm glad you're here."

You smiled at him slightly.

"Is anyone else home?" you asked quietly.

"Jimin and Namjoon-hyung, but they're asleep."

You nodded in response and he stepped closer to you, pinning you against the now closed front door. He wrapped his long arms around your waist and buried his face in your neck, kissing your weak spot. It made you moan. How could he do that so quickly? You felt him smile against your skin and it sent a shiver down your spine.

He took your hand and lead you down the hallway to his bedroom. It was basically a routine now. As soon as he shut the door, you were pulling off each other's clothes, kissing passionately between each layer removed. You never got tired of looking at him naked; his perfectly toned arms and thighs, his six pack and deep v hip muscles, the sleeve of tattoos that lined his hand and arm. He had a beautiful body, and that was something you had no problem admitting to yourself.

For being the youngest member in the group, he sure knew what he was doing. He was extremely shy on the surface, but that all disappeared in bed.

When you both had finished (you multiple times thanks to Jungkook), he laid down behind you and wrapped an arm around your waist and the other under your head, like a big spoon and little spoon. He lazily ran his fingertips along your bare side and it gave you goosebumps.

"You've asked me here a lot this week," you stated matter-of-factually.

You felt him sigh softly.

"Yeah, work's been kind of tough."

You traced the purple heart tattoo on his hand with your finger gently, then moved to the ARMY symbol to do the same.

"I'm sorry."

You wanted to know more, but you didn't want to pry.

He sighed again and buried his face in your messy hair.

"Your hair smells so nice." he said muffled.

You smiled.

"Thanks."

There was a pause before he spoke again.

"Plus, I like having you here. In my bed."

That made your heart skip a beat, but you had to ignore it.

"I like being in your bed." you replied shyly.

He scooted himself closer to you, if that was even possible, so close that you could feel his pounding heart in the middle of your back.

"Um.. h-how was your day?" he questioned.

The two of you didn't usually talk much after, hardly at all actually, but this was nice.

"It was okay. Just went to work. Pretty uneventful," you shrugged, "How was yours?"

Jungkook removed his arm from under you and turned so he was lying on his back, his arm resting under his head. You did the same.

"Aishh, it was okay. It's been a little stressful lately. It's different with everything that's been going on. We haven't even really experienced anything like it, obviously."

You nodded in understanding.

"But.. you still enjoy it?" you couldn't help but wonder out loud.

He ran a hand through his messy hair.

"Yes, I love it. I get to work with my 6 hyungs every day. But..." he paused, "It's hard sometimes, too. We are constantly busy, constantly booked. Album after album, performance after performance, always filming something, doing press, shooting videos... it can be a lot. We're coming out with a new album in a few weeks, as I'm sure Namjoon-hyung has mentioned, so we've been trying to put on the finishing touches. It's a great album, I was able to write a lot of it and share my ideas and we're really proud. But there are other things I want to do, too."

"Like what?"

He scrunched his face in thought for a moment.

"Release my solo mixtape. I've been working on for literally years. It hasn't felt good enough, but maybe I'm also too picky. And direct more videos. I like directing a lot. I love taking photos and videos, especially of the people and things I love. So I don't know... stuff like that."

He shrugged.

"I'm sure you will find time," you tried reassuring him.

"Sometimes it feels like there isn't enough time in the world."

He paused before turning his head to you.

"Sorry, for ranting about it," he blushed shyly, but gave you a shy smile.

You smiled back.

"I don't mind."

He stretched out his arm, creating in opening between his shoulder and upper arm. He patted the space above the pit of his arm with his other hand.

"Do you... want to lay your head here?" he asked cautiously, hoping it wasn't too bold of a move to ask.

You nodded slowly and moved closer to him, resting your head in the nook he had made, laying your arm across his chest. You felt nervous, as this wasn't a position you two had ever laid in before. You couldn't believe how well you seemed to fit together, and how warm and comfortable he was. You closed your eyes and felt the rise and fall of his chest with every breath he took. It made you sleepy.

"Thank you for coming over tonight." he mumbled, kissing your forehead softly.

"Mmmhmm..." you responded sleepily.

He caressed your hair gently over and over, lulling you to dreamland.

Before you were completely out however, you heard him say,

"I wish you'd just stay over every night..."

You left Jungkook's room and was met with the bright sunlight coming in through the large windows that looked over the city of Seoul. You desperately needed some coffee so you made your way into the large kitchen.

"I thought I saw your car here when I left for my bike ride this morning!"

Namjoon's back was turned toward you upon you entering the kitchen, but he still noticed your sudden presence. He was pouring coffee grounds into the machine preparing to make a pot.

"Good morning, Joonie," you responded groggily.

You pulled out a stool from under the kitchen island and sat down, leaning your arms on the countertop.

"And how was your night with our golden boy JK?" he asked teasingly.

You blushed. You had told Namjoon when you guys had first started hooking up, but it was still kind of embarrassing having everyone know about it.

"It was fine..." you mumbled back, fiddling with your fingers.

Namjoon turned around and you were met with his dimpled smile.

"Ahhh, I can't believe our maknae is all grown up... and with one of my best friends nonetheless!" he chuckled, "Life sure is weird."

You rolled your eyes at him.

"I wouldn't say he's with me exactly," you corrected him.

He cocked his head.

"No? Then what would you call it?"

You shrugged, avoiding eye contact with your friend.

"I'm not sure..."

He stared at you in disbelief.

"You guys have talked about it at least, right?"

Your silence was all the response he needed.

"Oh my god, (y/n), come on!" he threw his hand up to his forehead and ran it through his brown hair.

"What, Joonie?" you protested, "It's not exactly an easy conversation to have."

"Well of course not, but it's a conversation you should have."

You sighed. You knew he was right.

He leaned in front of you, placing his elbows in his palms.

"He likes you, (y/n)."

You scoffed.

"No, no," you waved your hands in disagreement, "he doesn't. Not like that."

He raised his eyebrows.

"He's constantly asking me about you, (y/n). Wondering what you're up to, what things you like, how he should respond to you."

You looked at him in surprise.

"He is?"

Your heart started racing.

"Yes," he continued, "You're older than him so it's intimidating. I think he's worried about saying the wrong thing, or coming off too strong towards you."

You couldn't believe what you were hearing. Why hadn't Namjoon told you this before? Were you that unobservant that you hadn't noticed Jungkook had feelings for you? Or was Namjoon exaggerating? Your mind was racing. You put your head in your palms and rubbed your face, overwhelmed with this new information. You groaned.

"I'm sorry, (y/n) I thought you two had talked about it." he paused, "So what are you then... like friends with benefits?"

You shook your head and shrugged.

"I-I don't know... just benefits?"

It was Namjoon's turn to groan.

"Ahhhhh shit, that never ends well."

"Well what do I do, Namjoon-ah?" you asked in concern.

He thought for a moment.

"Do you like him?"

You felt your stomach flop. It was a question you had been avoiding asking yourself. And now here was Namjoon asking you for an answer.

You ran a hand through your hair.

"I really don't know..."

And that was the truth. Though you had idea of the answer, you weren't sure you were ready to admit it to yourself... or anyone else for that matter.

"Well, I encourage you to try and figure it all out," he stood up straight and turned to grab two mugs out of the cupboard, "I love you and I love Jungkook-ah, I really don't want to see either of you get hurt."

"Yeah..." you agreed quietly.

He poured both you a cup of coffee then opened the refrigerator.

"Now, what should I make us for breakfast?"

69 notes · View notes

definitelyseven · 4 years

Text

deal | nine

summary: when your step-mom unexpectedly offers you a deal you can’t resist, you decide to give her a taste of her own medicine by seducing her potential suitor, Im Jaebum.

You quickly grabbed your bag and ran downstairs. It was 8:45am and you had work at 9am. You’ve overslept.

“Running late?” Eunbi asked with a smirk.

“Where’s Jaebum?” you asked while putting on your heels.

“He left already. Please don’t tell me you’re expecting a ride from him everyday. He’s a very busy man you know,” she said with her arms crossed.

“You can’t give it a rest, can you? You’re bitchy every second of the day,” you commented as you walked past her and out the door. You quickly caught a taxi down the street, but even with no traffic you were going to be 30 minutes late.

“You’re late,” Anna spatted at you as soon as you walked into the office.

“Sorry,” you said trying to catch your breath and straighten out your clothes.

“Come on, there’s a meeting in 5 minutes. You need to get the conference room set up,” she said handing you a box of files to lay out on the table. You didn’t have time to change your heels this morning and running around to get to work made it worst but you sucked it up and did your job. Just as you were about to finish setting up, Jaebum walks in the meeting room. He completely ignores you and sits down at the table.

“Mr. Im, can I get you something to drink?” you asked professionally.

“Anna, will you please get me an iced americano?”

You let out a small sigh before moving on to the next person to take their order. You did nothing wrong and if he’s going to treat you like this so be it.

Another handsome looking man walked into the conference room - he looked familiar. He was the guy that taught at your gym. You’ve taken his classes before. He smiles at you before sitting down next to Jaebum.

The whole day was no different from the conference room. Jaebum did nothing but ignore you. Whenever he needed something, he would ask Anna to take care of it.

“Working late?” someone called from behind. You quickly turned around to see the same guy at the meeting. “I’m Jackson,” he smiled as he extended his hand to you.

“Y/N,” you replied, reaching out to shake it. You looked at your watch, it was already 10pm. You got stuck with all the bitch work towards the end of the day again, but the only thing different was that Jaebum wasn’t here to help you.

“I saw the lights still on and wanted to see who was working so hard,” he teased.

"I was just leaving,” you laughed as you picked up your purse.

“We’ve met before, you know?”

“I know,” you smiled. “You used to teach at the gym I went too.”

“Can I give you a ride home?”

“Oh...that’s alright. Thank you though,” you politely declined before walking away.

The bus schedule showed the next bus was supposed to arrive in 10 minutes, but you’ve been waiting for 30 minutes already. As you were able to give up and call for a taxi, a black car pulls up next to the curb.

“Get in.” It was Jackson. “Get in, it’s late.”

You nodded and got in the car, “Thank you.” You buckled your seatbelt as he drove off. “My address is...”

“I know where you live,” he interrupted. You looked at him confused.

“How do you know?” Jackson doesn’t answer but only smiles at you. The question wanders in your mind during the whole ride home. He didn’t seem like some kind of stalker, but thirty minutes later, he was pulling up to the front of Jaebum’s house. “Thanks,” you said as you unbuckled your seat belt.

“Did you know we have security cameras inside the training rooms?” he randomly asked. You looked at him confused again. You paused, rethinking what he just said.

“Oh God...” you let out as you feel your heart drop down to your stomach. “Oh my god...” you repeated before running out of the car.

“Y/N...” Jackson calls after you. You sighed and turn back to confront him.

“Do you still have the footage?” you asked biting your lip.

“Don’t worry. I deleted it.”

You nodded. “Thanks,” you awkwardly said before walking away again. You didn’t get far before you turned back around. “I’m not his girlfriend,” you explained. “I’m kind of his step daughter,” you gulped, nervous to see to his reaction.

“Hey, it’s okay. I’m not judging,” he smiled while rubbing your arm.

“Eunbi married my dad and then he died and moved onto Jaebum. She doesn’t know about the gym thing and I’d like to keep it that way,” you hinted.

“Are you sure she doesn’t know?” he asked.

“What?”

“Everyone on that floor is one of Eunbi’s spies. Everyone secretly reports to her because she’ll be their boss’s new wife.”

“I didn’t know that but thank you for telling me,” you smiled.

“Don’t worry. Your secret is safe with me,” Jackson reassured.

“Thank you,” you sighed in relief. He was Jaebum’s friend, he wouldn’t tell his secret to everyone. You were sure of it. “I should go inside now.” Jackson nods, waving goodbye.

As soon as you walked in, you see Jaebum waiting by the stairs with his arms crossed. “You’re home late.”

“Yeah...work,” you replied softly before walking past him.

“Y/N,” he called. He’s been ignoring you all day and now he wants to talk.

“Yes Mr. Im,” you responded with a fake smile.

“Don’t be like this,” Jaebum said grabbing your arm.

“Be like what?”

“Petty and bratty.”

“No I was being professional. You were being petty,” you clarified. You were annoyed and pissed at him. He was the one who ignored you. He was the one who wasn’t acting professionally. Jaebum pins you against the wall in frustration. “What? Am I wrong?” you pointed out. Jaebum reaches under your dress and towards your panties. “What?” you scoffed. “Now you want to be with someone like me?” He looks at you confused. “Come on Jae. We both knew what you meant last night. A slut like me right?”

He stands there shocked at your words. There was no denying he implied it last night. He was overwhelmed at you questioning his marriage and his way of taking care of his son.

“Daddy!” you hear Minguk yell from outside. As quick as he pushed you against the wall, Jaebum lets go of you and walks towards the door while you straighten out your clothes. “Daddy!” Minguk screams again jumping into his arms.

Minguk’s interruption gave you the perfect opportunity to slip away upstairs. You weren’t proud of your actions - sleeping with someone’s man but this was different. At first you wanted Eunbi to suffer, to make her feel what you felt when she married your father; when she stole everything from you. But now, you wanted to show Jaebum that Eunbi wasn’t the woman she made herself out to be. She won’t be a good mother to him and you couldn’t let that sweet little boy get used like that. However, Jaebum didn’t seem to mind. He seemed convinced that Eunbi would take care of Minguk like her own, but you were the perfect example; even with money, she abandoned you.

“Meet me at the wine cellar,” Jaebum texted. You contemplated on whether to ignore him or meet him downstairs. You didn’t have the energy to argue with him or convince him otherwise, but you missed his touch. You made your way downstairs to the wine cellar. Jaebum was already there waiting for you with an open bottle of wine. “I didn’t think you would come.”

“I just wanted to clarify something,” you said walking towards him. “I’m not proud of what I’m doing but I’m no slut. I didn’t force you to sleep with me. You wanted it just as much as I did so don’t make this my fault.”

“I’m sorry,” he apologized.

“No you’re not. You’re only sorry because I’m hurt by what you said,” you explained.

“I didn’t ask you to come down here to talk about this,” Jaebum said, sipping his wine.

“Right...” you nodded slowly. “You called me down here to fuck.”

“I...” he tried to explain.

“What she can’t satisfy you anymore? I wonder what’s going to happen when you get sick of me,” you snapped before walking away. Jaebum grabs your wrist and pins you against the wall again. You groaned at how rough he was being with you. “Are you going to keep doing that?”

“Are you going to keep talking back to me?” he whispered with his lips close to yours.

“What are you going to do about it?” you argued. He smirks, lifting your legs up to wrap around his waist. He pushes his lower body up against yours. You let out a small moan once you feel his hard member poking at you.

“Not talking back anymore, huh?” he snickered.

“Shut up and kiss me,” you tell him as he slams his lips against yours. He was rough with you as if he was taking out all his anger on you. Jaebum’s hands roams up and down your body. Your core was already wet at the thought of him fucking you. His fingers quickly found your panties, pushing it to one side before slipping his digits in between your wet folds.

“Look at you, so wet for me already,” he whispered in your ear.

“Are you going to keep talking or are you going to fuck me?”

“Shh...what a filthy mouth you have,” Jaebum said giving your neck a light suck while rubbing your clit in circular motions.

“Jae!” the both of you hear Eunbi scream as her footsteps grew closer and closer.

“Fuck,” the both of you whispered. Jaebum drops you to your feet before walking away from you.

“What the hell are you guys both doing down here?” Eunbi asked, angry.

“Relax Mother. I’m here to grab a drink and then I’m leaving,” you said calmly. You grabbed the glass of wine on the table and walked away. You let out a sigh once you got back to your room - that was close.

You woke up earlier this morning, afraid that you’d be late to work again. You also didn’t know if Jaebum was going to give you a ride or if you’d have to take the bus.

“I can take you to work today,” Jaebum called from the living room as you put on your heels. “Have breakfast with us,” he calls again. Just as you were about to respond to him the door bell rings. You went to open the door and see Jackson smiling at you.

“Ready for work?” he asked.

“What?” you responded, a little taken back at what he said.

“I’m here to drive you to work so you don’t have to take the bus,” Jackson clarified. Jaebum comes up from behind you, staring at his best friend.

“What are you doing here?” Jaebum asked.

“I’m here to take Y/N to work so she doesn’t have to take the bus. Let’s go,” he urged.

“Actually I’m taking her today,” Jaebum said reaching out to grab your wrist. You stood there frozen and confused.

“Don’t be ridiculous Jae. Enjoy your breakfast with Minguk and I’ll take her,” Jackson smiled sweetly before reaching for you.

You didn’t expect Jackson to show up this morning nor did you expect them to fuss about driving you to work.

a little note from jennie: hello loves! sorry i didn’t post last week. i’ve been really busy at work and needed to take a break, but i’m back! hope you enjoy! :)

217 notes · View notes

sdmnluvs · 3 years

Text

Home Town Glory- Minishaw

Disclaimer!! I know that Simon is in a very happy relationship with Talia! It’s just for entertainment purposes and to let me practice my writing. This is also posted on my Wattpad!

28 years old and he misses home more than ever. That's why he's walking the streets of Hemel Hempstead at quarter past 11 on a Friday night.

It wasn't his plan when he woke up this morning. But he had fucked up, told Harry he loved him and when Harry just stared at him he fled the flat in record worthy time.

Got back to his own flat with ignoring Harry's missed calls and texts. Grabs a bag and packs a weekends worth of clothes as Jj enters his room confused.

"You alright there Simon?" He asks dumbly as the taller runs to the bathroom to grab his toothbrush. "I-I fucked up, going home for the weekend!" He says, pulls out his phone to call an Uber. He doesn't care if it's expensive, would spend every dime in his bank account if it meant he didn't have to look at the pity his friends would throw him when they found out what he had done.

"Did something happen with Harry? Did you guys break up?" Jj asks shock evident in his voice. Everyone was sure that they were a stable couple. Maybe looks really can be deceiving.

"I need to clear my head for a while Jide, if Harry comes please don't tell him where I am," Simon says before grabbing his bag and leaving Jj standing in bedroom. Heard the door close and the younger doesn't know what to do.

But he listens to what Simon said. When Harry shows up half an hour later with tears in his eyes it takes all of his might to say that he doesn't know where Simon is. Says me might have gone to visit Josh.

It's evil really, Jj decides when Harry leaves his sitting room with a look of determination on his face. He's sending the poor boy on a wild goose chase for what? Jj doesn't even know what happened between the both of them. For all he knows Simon could be in the wrong here. He had said that he fucked up.....

But by the time he comes to the decision that he should ask Harry what happened the brunet is long gone and he curses to himself. Feels even worse when he realizes that Josh will probably send Harry to Tobi's to check, then Tobi will send him to Randys and Randy will send him back to the flat.

Simon calls him 2 hours later. He's sat in his old room and trying not to cry. "So what happened?" Jj never did have the best patience, Simons surprised he's waited this long.

"I overreacted I guess," the blond sighs. "I told Harry that I loved him. He just stared at me for a straight minute. I couldn't deal with it Jide so I ran. I ran as fast and as far away as I could. Sure I only made it about 27 miles away from home but I couldn't deal with the pity when I told you. I just thought, it's been a year and I've loved him for long. But I guess that it was too soon".

Simon explains it all and Jj listens. Doesn't interrupt just let's Simon talk and it feels nice. Once he's finished talking Jj comforts him. Tells him to go for a walk even though it's 8pm and the sun is going to set soon. Also tells him that Harry definitely loves him back. "He was probably shocked Simon. Give him time. Just go relax, hey go to that park you used to drag me to every Sunday!".

And Simon follows his advice. Tells his mum that he's going to pub to see a few of his old friends. He doesn't need her worrying about him anymore than she already is. So he heads out. Goes for a walk around the town.

Meanwhile Jj sighs when he hears the door knock again. Knows that it's either Josh about to give out to him for sending Harry round his when he knew exactly where the blond was because Tobi had already called him and gave out to him. Or it's Harry back, probably just as deflated as he was this morning.

Opens the door and he's not shocked to see Harry stood in front of him. Bit more shocked that Ethan is stood with him. Arm wrapped around the youngers shoulder. He's smiling sadly and Harry's a puddle of tears.

Jj opens the door wider and rushes both of them in. They all sit down on the couch and Harry won't let go of Ethan's arm as he re-tells the story of his day.

"I-I was shocked Jide, I didn't expect him to say it. I called him back, must've called his name 20 times but it was too late. He was gone. Cal wouldn't let me go until I had told him that happened. I never got the chance to tell him that I love him too. I got to yours as fast as I could. Then you told me to go to Josh and he wasn't there.

Freya convinced me to have a cup of tea and some breakfast. I didn't want to tell them why I was there but you know what Freya's like. They gave me some comforting words and then Josh said that he might be at Tobi's. So I went to Tobi's but he wasn't there. I stayed for a while, talked to Tobi to calm down.

Our last resort was that he was at Randys. But he wasn't. Randy made me eat again, told me that he'd probably of gone back to the flat by now. But that I should maybe leave him until tomorrow. I agreed and was heading home but I couldn't face it. The thought that I'd lost Simon forever. Like our relationship had started and ended in my flat.

Ethan was the closest person to me at that stage. Told the taxi driver to turn around...," he trails off tears falling faster and harder. Ethan throws a comforting arm around him and finishes the story for the younger.

"I tried to calm him down but it was no use. That's when I realized that maybe big man knowledge, strength, Integrity would know where Simon is by now!" Ethan says his eyes cold and narrow when he says Integrity and Jj knows that he's in for it.

He loves Simon he really does, he's his best friend but Harry's sat in their living room crying an actual river and Ethan's glaring at him as much as to say "Tell him the truth or else".

"He's away home for the weekend. I'm sorry Harry, I promised him I wouldn't tell you," but Harry isn't even mad. He lets go of Ethan for the first time since he entered the flat and hugs Jj as tightly as he can.

"Jide please, we have to go. I'll do anything, I'll, I'll-"

Jj stops him, the least he can do is drive the three of them to Hertfordshire as an apology to Harry. Even though it's 10pm and he has a meeting at 8am tomorrow. The things he does for his friends.

So here Simon is. Quarter past 11 on a Friday night. He had actually popped into the local pub. Met a few of his old friends and downed 2 pints. Laughed and laughed and laughed as they re-told childhood stories. Listens as they catch him up on everything he had missed the past 8 years not living at home.

Sure his mum had kept him up to date and he had come home every so often but he'd never found the time to catch up with old friends. Looks around the room and wonders if he had never left what would life be like?

Would he be sat here with the same group of friends every Friday night making memories to last a lifetime. Would Jide be KSI or would he be sat here right next to him. Would he of met a nice girl from the town and be married already. Would he of made memories?

Thinks and remembers that he's made memories to last a lifetime. He's met people, he's met his friends, he's met Harry. The love of his life and suddenly it's all too much. The walls of the pub are closing in on him. He thanks them for the laughs and memories but he's gotta go. Promises them that he'll come home again, with Jj this time and they'll make even more memories.

He looks back and smiles seeing them all doubled over in laughter over something one of them had said. He wants to say that he escaped but there was never really anything to escape. Everyone that stayed is happy. They're all content with their lives. And so is he. He took a different route that's all.

Left the pub and heads off in the direction of the park Jj had mentioned. He had wanted to leave it for last. Let's his mind wander as he wanders around the streets.

Passes by a group of teenagers shrieking in laughter, empty bottle of vodka in their hands and he has to smile. Because that used to be him, running through the same streets when he was younger. Drunk, young and free.

He's so engrossed that he almost walks into a woman. She asks if he's lost because she's never seen him around here. He shakes his head, tells her that he's not lost, just wandering around home. She leaves him be and he keeps going.

Arrives at the park and heads straight to the field. Lies down and watches the stars. Let's the day wash over him and he can't help but smile as he remembers the first time he ever went star gazing was with Harry.

Jj knocks on the door. Simons mum opens the door and she's so happy to see Jj. Welcomes him inside but Jj asks if Simons around. She can hear the desperation in his voice and tells him that he went down to the pub to met a few of the lads.

So the 3 of them leave. They enter and nobody bats and eyelid at them. Jj instantly spots the group of people that Simon should be with, it's just, he's nowhere to be seen. Swears under his breath as he approaches the table.

Taps one of the boys on the shoulder and he turns grinning. "When we told Simon to hurry back with you we didn't mean this soon!" The man laughs and stands up to hug Jj.

He laughs weakly "it's really nice to see you James, but do you have any idea where Simon is?". The man now known as James to Harry and Ethan shakes his head. Explains how he left 20 minutes ago, adds that he looked like he had been doing a lot of thinking. Jj thanks him and they leave,

"So we're back to square 1?" Ethan asks as Harry lets a sob rip from his mouth. "This is all my fault, I shouldn't of been such a prick today," he cries as Ethan hugs him.

"It's ok Bog, let's just head back to his, he'll be home-," Jj starts but then stops. He has a shit eating grin on his face. "I know where he is!".

They all pile into Jj's car once again and 5 minutes later they're pulling up to a park. "Simon used to drag me here every Sunday, I told him to visit here when I was talking to him earlier as a joke," Jj explains as they exit the car and head to the field.

And that's where they spot him. Lying in the grass eyes closed and mouth turned upwards in a smile. Harry walks closer as Ethan and Jj hang back.

"Si?" Harry asks shyly and the body shoots up. Looks around and all air leaves his body because Harry is inching closer to him with a nervous smile on his face. Simon can't take it, not whilst he's at home, in his safe place.

"Harry, please not-," but Harry cuts him off. "Simon please, just listen to me I beg. You don't understand what I've done to get here!". So Simon stays quiet.

"Si I was shocked when you told me that you loved me. Ever since I met you I was convinced that I'd never be enough for you. I was just a 17 year old kid with insecurities that would've drowned me when I first met you. But you, as cringy as it sounds you taught me how to love myself. I was finally in the shallow end when I moved in with Cal and Cal and I started drinking a lot, when the drugs started.

But you were there. Every single time I relapsed you where there. On bad nights that I was tempted you made me watch a shitty movie with you. And even though I hate movies I watched them with you. You supported me when I came out. And then you kissed me when we where in Vegas for Jides fight. A week later we had our first date in London and you weren't embarrassed of me. You held my hand as we walked home and you asked me to be your boyfriend and I said yes. Because I loved you. You kept me afloat, Simon I have loved you since I was 18, too young to know what love is as mum always said. But I loved you. And I still do.

And I'm sorry that I left you standing there waiting for an answer today. I just couldn't wrap my head around the fact that you loved me, you love me just as much as I love you! And I would've been able to tell you all of this this morning but Cal held me back and then Jide sent me on a goose chase like a whole twat.

So I'm sorry Si, I love you. A lot more than the moon and stars combined,". And Simons stood staring at him, tears falling down his face. Because holy fucking shit. Harry loved him as much as he loved Harry. Didn't even think as he tackled him into a hug. Kissed him deeply and had every unspoken word added to it.

And Harry seemed to just know because when they pulled away he hugged him tighter. They turn to their 2 cheering friends before Simon leans down to kiss him again.

Because he had Harry. Harry was his, the love of his life. "I even love you enough for the first time I tell you to be in Hertfordshire," Harry giggles and Simon grins at him. "Hometown glory I guess,". And then Simon kisses him again

#harry lewis #wrotoshaw #simon minter #miniminter #Minishaw #w2s #fanfic #tumblr won’t let me #break up the paragraphs #sorry it’s all a blob

49 notes · View notes

crystalsmentalhealth · 3 years

Text

Talking about the Brattleboro Retreat in Brattleboro, Vermont

I recently spent two weeks at the Retreat and wanted to share my experiences both good and bad about it.

I arrived at the Retreat in mid-June of 2021 after a four day stay at the Emergency Department of my local hospital. Originally I had not wanted to go to the Brattleboro Retreat because it was such a big campus and I equated that with busy and loud and impersonal. The Retreat would challenge my assumptions.

Getting There

I didn’t drive myself. As I said I spent four days in the ED of my local hospital and so I arrived via ambulance. The ride was stressful and nauseating. I was already stressed and nervous and the mountainous winding roads did absolutely nothing to help. I didn’t lay in the stretcher, but sat in a back-facing seat with no arm rests and with a blood pressure cuff around my left arm.

The trip took about an hour and except for a few questions from the person riding in the back with me, it was spent in nearly complete silence, which again, did nothing to help my nerves. There was no reassurance or even light conversation.

My Arrival

When we got there, they grabbed my bags for me, probably because I wasn’t allowed to have them yet, and with one person before me and one person behind me, lead me up the stairs to the admissions office. We were met at the door by an admissions person and I was dropped off like an Amazon package. The ambulance personnel left and I was officially at the Retreat.

I was first led to Security. They dropped off my bags with Security, and asked me to empty my pockets. I had none and told them such. Then I was led to an exam room where the woman who was with me found a gown that would fit me and held it up in front of her. I was then told to strip completely. I balked, but obeyed. First went my shirt, then my bra, then I stepped into the gown. Then with that covering me, I wiggled out of my pants and underwear. She gave me a pair of hospital pants to put on so I wasn’t completely bare. Then I was shown a chair and given a pair of huge grippy socks to wear. One size fits all, I guess.

After that the lady took my blood pressure, my pulse, and checked my oxygen levels. Then she took my temperature. My clothes and shoes were sent to Security with the rest of my things. I had off-brand crocs as shoes so I had no idea what they needed to check for, but off they went.

After the clothing change I was led to an office. I felt so awkward standing in a grey hospital gown, blue hospital pants, no panties, and those huge grippy socks, in front of two nicely dressed office personnel. They let me have a seat and the questions and paperwork began.

What was my insurance? Did I know about the extra inpatient days allowed? Who was my primary care physician? My therapist? My psychiatrist? My case worker? Did I have an Advanced Directive? What are the addresses? Did I want a male or female provider? There were so many questions!

Then it was sign here, and here, and here, and here, and here.

After that I was given a green folder that said Welcome to Tyler 2 which contained various information that I would need during my time there. My patient Bill of Rights, how to file a complaint or grievance. That sort of stuff.

Then it was off to another area and now they wanted a urine sample. I had already done two at the hospital and really didn’t need to pee, but I tried. I assume it was for a drug test, but I have no real clue.

Then I was sent off to another exam room, this time for a full physical. She asked me all about my medical history, whether I was having normal bowel movements or not, all about my diabetes, my family history (cancer, cancer, cancer, cancer, heart disease, cancer, kidney failure, cancer), she even checked my reflexes. The ARNP that examined me had the neatest notebook. It was electronic and I was fascinated by it.

(At the time of writing this I’ve only been home for two full days and I still have a very clingy cat who is currently laying on my left hand so if you catch a typo that kitty has caused me, please let me know.)

After the physical I was given one outfit to wear back, sans bra because my bra was underwire, and I was sent to a seat to wait to be sent to the unit.

The lady who watched over me offered me something to drink while I waited and when she offered milk I took her up on it. Unfortunately it was 1% milk, which I really hate, but hey, milk, so I drank it while I waited.

I didn’t have to wait long. Before long a Security guard and a nurse from the unit I would go to came down and led me down one corridor, in one elevator, through a cafeteria, up another elevator, and finally I was on the unit.

Tyler 2

The first thing I noticed when I got on the unit was that the bedrooms were singles. Yes! I hate sharing my bedroom in hospitals. At the worst, I’d once had to share with three other people stuffed into a two person bedroom. Two poor souls had had to sleep on cots. So I was very happy to see that I would have my own room.

I was shown into an interview room for yet even more paperwork and questions. All this is the business of the psychiatric hospital and it comes at the literal worst time of your stay, the beginning. When you’re scared and your nerves are raw, and your mental health is at it’s worst.

A three question questionnaire was first. Why are you here? How can we help? What are your coping skills? Depression, anxiety, suicidal ideation. I don’t know. Reading and journaling.

Then there was a check list of things that helped when I was feeling bad. I was fascinated to see that laying down in my room was one of the options. Most hospitals I had been in forbade that, with some going so far as to lock the doors to the bedrooms during the day so people didn’t sleep the day away. It was a pleasant surprise, and I checked that off along with a few others that I felt applied.

Then, the nurse, and we’ll just call her Rose, asked me if I was hungry and told me that they always had sandwiches on the unit and that the kitchen which held milk, orange juice, flavored water, cold water, hot water, coffee, teas, and various snacks was open 24/7. I declined both sandwich and snack.

Finally, I was left alone for a couple of minutes and I had a moment to just breathe. It was a Thursday according to the giant whiteboard that had the day’s schedule on it. Most of the groups were over with.

A little bit later a bag was brought up with my clothes and another with the few things I was allowed to have: my Bible; two coloring books; two books (A Street Cat Named Bob and A Wrinkle in Time); my toothbrush, my hair brush, and my composition notebook; were given to me. The clothes I wasn’t given yet. I was told by a nurse that because of COVID they washed everything that came on the unit whether it was clean or not and I would get my clothes once they were dry.

I was then shown my room. Number 219 was to be my home for the foreseeable future. It was a fair sized room, the walls painted hospital blue, the floor had boring brown patterned tiles, There was a plastic chair, a twin size bed with a single pillow, and brown blanket, and bottom sheet. There was no flat sheet.

There was a set of built in shelves and a small alcove with an unbreakable mirror and large shelf where I put my green folder as well as my other personal belongings that I was permitted to have. I hung around in there for a few minutes before wandering back out and awkwardly looked around.

It was soon 8:30pm and Rose, who was my nurse that night, offered me my bedtime medications. I accepted and went to bed.

The Schedule

I slept fitfully that night. I was scared, they checked on me every 15 minutes, and it wasn’t quite dark when I went to bed. I woke up obscenely early the next morning, which is very unusual for me, but I attribute it to the uncomfortable mattress, the lack of my comfort item; a stuffed cat named Fat Cat that I sleep with, and the fact that my room had a double window that faced directly East. The sun rises at about 4:45am right now, so it woke me up at around 5:30am that morning.

I wandered out, thinking it was much later than it actually was, since it was fully light out. I sleepily blinked at the analog clock and tried to decipher it. Inwardly I groaned at the time. To kill time, I awkwardly wandered around the unit again, and I think I laid back down for a little while.

Eventually I left my room again and it was 7:30am. Shift change. I can’t remember who my nurse was that morning, but by 8am it had become quite the busy place with the morning nurses, the mental health workers, the social workers, and the group leaders milling about the nurses station.

I noticed that the whiteboard had changed with the day, and so I glanced at the Friday schedule.

8am - Breakfast 9am - Community Meeting 10am - OT Movement 11am - Psychotherapy 12pm - Lunch 1pm - Courtyard (yellow level) 2pm - OT Activities 3:30pm Shift Change 4pm - Courtyard (yellow level) 5pm - Supper 6:15pm - Game room/small courtyard (yellow level) 7pm - Wrap Up 8pm - Free Time 9pm - Relaxation 10pm - Phones/computer/TV off

Yes, we had a computer. Some guy we’ll just call J tended to hog it, but so long as it wasn’t group, before morning shift change or after 10pm or 11pm on Friday night and Saturday night, anybody could use it. Of course Facebook and YouTube were blocked, but Vimeo wasn’t. Can somebody please tell me the difference between YouTube and Vimeo?

I didn’t really go to groups that first day, and I was on Red level, so I wasn’t allowed outside even if I had wanted to. I did however see the Social Worker, a very nice woman we’ll just call M. and my doctor via ZOOM, Dr. L.

All of the staff was really nice to me, and the unit, which at that point had a census of 19, was actually fairly quiet for the most part.

When 8am hit, and the breakfast trays arrived, I asked where I should go to eat. I was told I could eat on the porch, the day room, or in my room. Eating in peace alone in my room. Yes, please. I took my tray, got a carton of milk, and walked down the hall to my room.

When I pulled the lid off my plate, I discovered eggs, home fries, and a corn muffin. I also had some fruit. I cautiously tried the potatoes and found them to be quite good, but couldn’t eat anything else so I took my tray back.

I hovered awkwardly around the schedule board until somebody brought me a chair.

Then it happened. My stomach began churning. I went to the nurses station and told one of the three nurses that I had a bit of an upset stomach and could I have something for it? She looked up something and told me I could have some Tums. She sent me to the med window and used some fancy machine to dispense the Tums. I stuck them in my mouth and chewed. I swallowed. It was then that I knew I had made a mistake. I literally felt the Tums hit my stomach, felt my stomach cramp, and then I was vomiting.

After that experience and the cleaning up thereof, I got my morning meds at around 9am, and soon found myself back in the interview room, this time with a nutritionist. At least I think that was Friday. It could have been Monday. Regardless, I talked to her about being sick (it wasn’t the first time, I had gotten sick back in the ED as well), my lack of appetite, my diabetes, the medication for diabetes I was on (2000mg of Metformin and .5mg of Ozempic). She gave me some information the nutritionist I had talked to from my doctor’s office had already given me, then ordered Glucerna for me three times per day.

Glucerna is the diabetics version of Ensure for those of you who don’t know.

I slept a lot that day, and I’m pretty sure I refused lunch and maybe supper. They checked on me - and everybody else - every 15 minutes, but otherwise didn’t pester me.

The next day, of course, started the weekend. I can’t remember the exact schedule for the weekend, but it was far, far more boring than then weekday. There was just Community Meeting which I wandered into but didn’t participate in, a couple more courtyard opportunities than on the weekdays, more free time, Wrap Up and Relaxation. Relaxation happened at 9pm, but I already considered that bedtime as that was when I got my bedtime medication.

Sunday was just a repeat of Saturday with one bright exception. Sunday Sundaes. At around 2pm we got ice cream with sundae toppings that we could have on it. I don’t think I got it that first Sunday, but I can’t quite remember.

Monday doesn’t bring any particular memories except that that’s when I started attending a group here and there.

Meeting Nathan

Then Tuesday came, and I met Nathan. Nathan was a Psych intern who is now no longer there, so I’m not afraid of using his name. Nathan did 11am Psychotherapy, but had been on vacation the week before as well as Monday. I liked him instantly. He spoke quietly, thoughtfully, gently, and never pressed for answers if the person didn’t want to or couldn’t.

At first, we only spoke in group, but after one group disintegrated into chaos he ended it early and offered to speak to me one-on-one. The one-on-one time I got with Nathan, which eventually became every weekday, became the best, most helpful part of my stay at the Retreat. Some of his questions were hard. They were either highly thought provoking or brought on strong emotions, but he was very skilled in not pushing too hard and always bringing me back to the present if I got too lost in the past.

I think I opened up more to Nathan in the week and a half that we spoke than I ever did in the two years I’ve seen my normal therapist.

The Nightmares

I’ve suffered from nightmares for a very long time. In my nightmares I’ve been raped, had my home invaded, seen demons, had my parents stolen away by a dragon (that one happened twice. Same stupid dragon too.), been kidnapped, been chased around Wal-Mart by paramedics with a stretcher, and so on and so forth. The nightmares I suffered at the Retreat were something else entirely.

The dream I remember most, and let me list off some trigger warnings real quick: blood; abortion; abuse; infant death; decomposition; bad parenting; bad medical professionals, was about this young woman who tried to do some sort of home abortion that got botched. She went to the hospital and they sent her strait to surgery where they cut her open with no painkillers or anesthesia. The baby was tiny, but healthy and viable, so they took her out of the young woman’s womb, and haphazardly stapled the woman’s abdomen back together.

Then the dream began to focus on the baby, but not in linear time, but rather in snapshots. In the first snapshots the baby was fine. Pink, perfect, beautiful little girl dressed in frills. Then the next day’s photographs and the baby’s face was turning black in places. The next; her eyes turned murky and there was more decomposition. Mind you, while she’s decomposing, she’s still alive. Then her little fingers turn black and fall off, and it continues like this until the fifth day when the baby finally dies.

The mother, who was recovering from her own trauma, couldn’t have cared less about her baby.

The nightmare turned weird after that and I don’t remember what happened next, but I continued to have vicious nightmares during my stay there.

Dr. L tried to treat them with Prazosin. but I found that it made my nightmares more vivid. Then she tried to get me in a deeper sleep so the dreams wouldn’t wake me up, but that only got me caught in the nightmares and unable to wake up.

We never did figure out how to ease the nightmares and keep me asleep at the same time. Right now we’re trying a higher dose of Gabapentin, also known as Neurontin. I guess we’ll see how it works out.

Strange Characters

There were some...interesting characters at the Retreat. There was one guy who we’ll call J. You may recall him from my complaints about him being a computer hog. He suffered from delusions of grandeur and I believe psychosis. One time I was in the open area near the nurses station he began staring at me suspiciously. Then, after a couple of very awkward moments he asks me, “are you an Imperial or a Rebel?” I told him I had no idea what he was referring to. Miss J who was sitting near by goes, “she’s an imperial, she’s a good girl.” Then J nods and says “I know she’s my sister in Christ, so she must be good.”

I still have no idea what he meant by Imperial or Rebel. Is it a Star Wars thing? If so I thought the Rebels were the good guys. I’m so confused.

Miss J was a homeless woman who had been there for nearly nine weeks. She was very nice to me, but she mumbled a lot and I had to keep asking her to repeat herself.

M was a strange old lady. She would sit at the nurses station and laugh and laugh and laugh as loudly as she could, then all of the sudden she’d be declaring one of the housekeepers an angel on earth and how he should be protected and how everybody else was basically garbage. She eventually got taken out via ambulance.

A was another strange woman. Having been there since May 27th, 2021, she was there involuntary, She talked to herself a lot, drank loads of coffee, walked in and out of groups, and was best buddies with a woman who liked to be called Rabbit, as her real name, the same name as A, triggered her. A and Rabbit were thick as thieves and fed off of each other’s chaos.

Rabbit liked to sing at the top of her lungs when she was happy and when she was angry she would file a grievance, announce loudly that Obama was her father and that you (the nurse she was screaming at) aren’t her boss. She was nice enough to me, but I went out of my way to be as non-intrusive as possible.

Then there was D. D was 30-years-old, claimed to have 12 children. D was volatile, a substance abuser who enjoyed “a drink, some weed, and some coke”. Pretty sure she didn’t mean the soda. D had a shadow who had to write down what she was doing every five minutes. I don’t know exactly why, for the most part, volatile or not, she was pretty chill. She dressed provocatively and the first time she spoke to me it was early morning and we were on the porch.

She asked me why I was there. I told her depression. She asks my why I was depressed. I admitted that there was a lot of trauma in my past. She tells me she’s been (tw:rape) raped all her life, and then proceeded to tell me that I shouldn’t be depressed because I was pretty and thin. Now. I’m smaller than D was, because I’ve never had children, let alone 12 of them, but I’m 5′3″ and 210 pounds; thin is not an adjective I would use to describe me.

She then proceeds to tell me that I needed a better bra. I was wearing a soft low support sports bra, so yeah, my chest area was very un interesting. I told her I was just wearing something I could sleep comfortably in. She told me to shop at Victoria’s Secret for some better bras and I’d feel great.

After that, D decides to mention the gray in my hair. She says “you should get extensions to make your hair long and pretty, or better yet, shave your head and wear wigs. It’s what the black girls do.” She then went on about how wigs could really look good and how I’d have so much fun with it that I’d forget all about being depressed and how there were some sites where you could buy some good wigs for really cheap.

As I recall, I was fairly unresponsive during her spiel and walked away as soon as it wasn’t rude to.

The Really Bad Day

I don’t recall exactly what day it was, time blurs for me on a good day, and I wasn’t having any good days while I was at the Retreat, but one day was really bad.

TW: Suicide TW: Self-Harm

I was really, really suicidal, and I told the nurse I was talking to that. She asked if I had a plan, and for the first time I really did. I told her I would wait until right after a check - remember we got checked on every 15 minutes - then I would take a pair of my pants and wrap them around my neck and strangle myself.

Then she asked if I intended to follow through with the plan. I wanted to, I really did, but I also didn’t want to cause trouble, and that’s a huge issue with me, so I told her no. And that was the truth. I was suicidal, I did have a plan. I had a detailed plan actually. But I didn’t really intend of following through.

As you might expect, she had to report that to my doctor. Dr. L. spoke to me about how I was feeling and later, about five minutes after I had gotten on the computer to use Duolingo to distract myself, (See, I was using coping skills.), the nurse I had spoken to, and who I liked quite a lot, came to me and said that Dr. L wanted them to temporarily confiscate my clothes and take the sheet and blanket off my bed. It was to be replaced by blankets that couldn’t be ripped. Nurse E told me it wasn’t a punishment, it was a safety precaution, but I was so embarrassed and felt punished. I was allowed to keep the weighted blanket they had let me borrow, and my pillow, but other than that they took every bit of fabric in the room.

I don’t know if it was a good move or not. I just know that I wanted things back to ‘normal’, as though anything in a psych hospital could be normal, but the next day I lied to Dr. Lambert and told her I was feeling better. She said I could have my stuff back, but for some reason when I asked a nurse later on, she told me that there were no orders about it from Dr. L.

I asked again the next day and was finally able to get my linens and clothes back. I even got an extra pillow, for which I was very grateful for as my original pillow had been quite flat and hard.

The Road to Discharge

I was originally supposed to have been released on June 29th, a Tuesday, but I had to admit to Dr. L that I just didn’t feel like I could be safe at home yet. Not to mention that we were still trying to deal with my nightmares and sleep issues.

Dr. L and M, my social worker began giving me assignments to do. I was to fill out a safety plan, which I did. M had me write a letter to my regular therapist about the changes I needed her to make to improve our sessions. I am terrified to read it to her, but I really need to. I was given a huge stack of DBT (Dialectical Behavioral Therapy) information and worksheets to fill out, Nathan had me write something about a cousin of mine who had passed away due to an overdose of Fentanyl, and so I wrote her a letter telling her how much I missed her, how I was angry she was gone, disappointed that she couldn’t tell me she was back on drugs, how I was angry at her mom for getting her hooked on drugs in the first place, and ways I could have helped if she had just let me.

Meanwhile, people found out that I could make things out of the Model Magic that they had in the Contraband/Sensory room. I made I can’t even remember how many cats for people. I also made roses, and one dragon.

I was also writing dark poetry, just trying to purge my dark thoughts and get them out on paper.

Nathan continued to have one-on-one therapy with me each weekday, even if he only had half an hour.

I was meeting with my social worker daily, which they normally didn’t do, but when she realized that I wouldn’t go to them if I needed something, she decided to head it off, and meet with me, even if it were only a couple of minutes, each week day.

Finally, we decided on a day. Friday, July 2, 2021. I was so nervous, but so excited to come home and see my furbaby, Loki.

When the day came, I dressed in the nicest clothes that I had brought, which was a pair of elastic waist jeggings and my pink Cat Mom t-shirt which everybody loved. I only went to one group that day, and that was Psychotherapy, and I had my meeting with Nathan. I had one last meeting with Dr. L. and my social worker. My nurse that evening gave me my treatment plan which had my diagnoses. (Major depressive disorder, severe; Borderline Personality Disorder; and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder)

Just as supper arrived I got the word that my ride was there.

Final Thoughts

Being at the Brattleboro Retreat was a difficult experience, but it was also a positive experience. In the beginning I was mad I wasn’t at the place where I had wanted to go, which was the Windham Center, but by the end of my first week there, I had decided to make the best of where I was. I didn’t like all the nurses, I definitely had my favorites and those I dreaded, not that they were ever mean to me, but I’m not sure, there’s just people you don’t like, you know?

I was on a great schedule while I was there. I was up no later than 8am and went to bed around 9pm, I ate at specific times. I got my medicine at specific times, and that routine was very comforting. Did I keep to it when I got home?

No. It’s currently 12:26 in the morning and I’m working on this still.

I’m still drinking my Glucerna, no matter that it costs me $40 a week for three a day, but I just don’t want to eat. Oh, I nibble. I’ve eaten some chocolate graham crackers and sipped on a 20oz Vanilla Coca Cola over the last four days. I just don’t eat.

I learned, while I was there, that it’s okay to speak up, to take up space, to have a voice, even if it’s quiet, I learned that it’s okay to get angry or ask for help. I can ask people for what I need. I don’t know how well I’ll be able to apply what I learned, but that’s always the hardest part of learning any new skill.

I know that this has been a huge amount of reading, but I wanted to give you a detailed example of what a psychiatric hospital is like. I hope that it informs you and I hope that if you’re heading to a psychiatric hospital or treatment center that maybe after reading this you’ll have less fear and anxiety because you have some clue as to what to expect.

I would also like to let my readers know that these are just my personal experiences in an American psychiatric hospital. I have no idea about British hospitals or European hospitals or even hospitals in other parts of the United States. My experiences in hospitals in Florida is a stark contrast to my experience in Vermont hospitals. I find Vermont’s response to medical care and psychiatric care in general is substantially better than Florida’s. I’ll do a post on that later.

Ask for help. Take up space. Use your voice.

National Suicide Hotline: 800 273-8255 Crisis Text Line: Text START to 741741

By the way, if you need me to tag another trigger word, please just send me a message and I’ll edit the tags to take your trigger word in consideration.

9 notes · View notes

3monthsineurope · 3 years

Text

September 13, 2021

Monday was an earlier day. Haley and I got up around 7:30 and she did a little packing. We went over to Mom and Dad’s room around 8 and then all walked to breakfast. It was another hot day! For breakfast I had some French toast, cereal, and hash browns. Of course we all had coffee and water, and Mom had an omelette. We didn’t spend much time at breakfast, because we were getting picked up at 9 by Lomas Travel.

We went back to our rooms and finished packing and I washed my face. Haley and I both went without makeup, then brought all our stuff over to Mom and Dad’s. They filled up half of my medium Away suitcase, and we called it good. Haley found a frog in their bathroom, haha! We grabbed all our luggage and rolled down to the lobby. Mom and I checked out for our rooms, and they cut off our all inclusive bracelets off. Overall, I really liked the Allegro Cozumel! The service was amazing and the hospitality was unmatched. I would definitely stay there again.

Lomas Travel picked us up right at 9, and we headed into town. I had the great idea of parking Dad at Starbucks, with all of our bags, so we weren’t carrying around five roller bags. Dad was okay with the idea because his back was still not feeling great. Our driver dropped us off near the Starbucks and Haley treated us all to coffee, thanks sis! We met another guy from Lomas, who gave us our ferry tickets to Playa del Carmen. We left Dad with his paper and a magazine and all our bags, and the three of us set off to explore the town.

We saw a “Cozumel” sign and a tour guide took a really cool panoramic photo for us! We spent about an hour and a half walking around the shops. I got a visor to wear at the pool and Mom got some stuff for her friends. Haley got a little purse and we got a few things for Dad, too. It was really hot, so around 11:15 we went back to Starbucks to meet up with Dad. We all used the bathroom and Haley got a snack.

Next up, we rolled our luggage down the street to the ferry dock. This ferry was much busier than our first ferry, almost everyone had luggage! We waited in line for a while, then started boarding at noon. We dropped our luggage and got tags for them, then found a row to sit together inside. I blogged some, but it was a pretty short ride, about 40 minutes. The water was pretty choppy, though. We grabbed our luggage and tipped the guy who helped us once we docked at Playa del Carmen, then headed to our meeting point to meet with Lomas. Our guide helped us to the place our taxi was picking us up, to take us to the Krystal Grand Hotel in Cancun. We had to wait a few minutes, because our ferry actually arrived late, due to the choppy weather. Mom went into a convenience store and bought us some water and peanuts for a snack. After a bit, our new Lomas driver arrived.

This time we were traveling in style, we had a large SUV with “The Luxury Collection by Lomas Travel” on the side, which was pretty cool! I sat in the back with Mom, and blogged a bit. Dad enjoyed talking to the driver, who was really kind. I was starting to feel a little weird, so I stopped blogging and then we arrived at the Krystal Grand Hotel! Cancun definitely had a different feel than Cozumel did, we were in the touristy area with tons of hotels and restaurants. Our driver helped us with all our bags, then we headed to check into our rooms! Thankfully, I was feeling better after getting out of the car.

We checked in and found out that our rooms were separate (much to Dad’s dismay), but they were right next to each other! This hotel was a huge circle with a hollow inside. Mom and Dad’s room was ready, so we went up to the ninth floor. Their room was really nice! We hung out there, then Mom, Haley, and I went downstairs to see if our room was ready. We were met by a hotel employee named Arturo. He helped us cut the line and get our keys, which was really nice! Haley went up to our room to shower, while Mom and I talked with Arturo about some plans we would like to make. I really wanted to go to Chichen Itza, which is old Mayan ruins. He ended up giving us a speech about getting a “membership” to their VIP hotel, Altitude. Mom and I really weren’t interested in that, so we ended the conversation and headed upstairs.

I checked out our room, and Haley told me Dad was supposed to be in his room. I knocked for a bit and he wasn’t there! I got a little worried because of his hurt back, I didn’t want him to be laying on the floor in pain! Mom and I looked around the hotel and found him coming in from the pool, phew. Turns out he went for a swim and checked out the ocean. I’m just glad he was okay! We stopped at the cafe in the lobby and grabbed us all some bottled water and a few snacks to tie us over to dinner. The three of us went back to our rooms, and Haley and I put on a little make up. I booked dinner for us at the Asian restaurant, for a teppanyaki style dinner (also called hibachi, like when they cook in front of you at Benihana).

The four of us headed down to the pool for a few hours before dinner. Haley and I went to the swim up bar and we just lounged around the pool for a while. There were umbrellas and waiters getting everyone drinks and it was just really nice out. Mom left before us to go shower before dinner, then Haley, Dad, and I went up and changed before dinner.

We all headed to dinner and had such a fun night! We had a waiter who kept Haley and I’s wine glasses full, and a chef that really entertained us while cooking at our flat top table. First up we were served miso soup, then sushi. Both were super tasty! All the while, our chef was putting on a show, cooking up fried rice and then pork, beef, and chicken. He really chatted with Dad, and kind of flirted with Mom, making a heart out of fried rice for her, hahah. Next up was the meat, and all the food was so tasty! There were some sauces for us to try, and none of us could finish our whole meal. We had some ice cream for dessert, I had green tea which was really good! While at dinner, Dad went to the bathroom and Arturo found him! Oh no, he wanted to sign us up for the “membership”. He had waited for hours to find all of us. Dad told him we weren’t interested, but told him Mom and I would talk to him in the morning—ugh.

After dinner, we decided to walk around the touristy area, outside of the hotel. We ended up walking down the wrong street, but it was nice to walk around and see some of the other hotels. It was still really hot out! We decided that the next night, we would go down the other way, which seemed to be more touristy. After our walk, we went up to the rooms. Dad iced his back, while Mom, Haley, and I went to hang out. Haley and I got a few glasses of wine and the three of us hung out in a cool bar, looking outside. Someone was even teaching a dance class out there, at like 10pm! The three of us had some really funny conversations, then called it a night, around 11. We got all the way up to our room, when I realized that my key had slipped under the chairs we were sitting on! Woops! We went back to the bar and Haley had to crawl through the wall to get it for us, hahah! We all said goodnight and Haley and I watched some TV while we were falling asleep. Unfortunately, I realized that I had lost my small stuffed turtle, Flipper. Ingvar got him for me for our first anniversary, from Hawaii. I looked through all my things and realized I probably left him in the sheets at the Allegro, Cozumel. I was really sad, but I couldn’t do anything about it. Haley was really sweet and cuddled up to me since I was missing Flipper (and Ingvar, hahah). It was still a great great day in Cancun, though! :]

2 notes · View notes

sunsetfanfics · 4 years

Text

All I Want

(Jadon Sancho x Reader)

Jadon imagine where he really likes you but knows you won’t be with him because of his fboy lifestyle and you always joke about it and he tried to get you or something along those lines please if you can x

Warning: a bit of harsh language

You drag yourself into the break room, feet aching. Tom, your coworker, watched in amusement as you plopped down into the chair across from him, a sigh escaping your lips.

"Tired?"

You look up to see him smile, which you can't help but reciprocate.

"A bit, yeah."

"Only an hour left now, then you get to go home." He replies, to which you nod.

"Yeah, only an hour. You say that as if it'll magically make me feel better."

He shrugs. "It should. You've already worked for seven hours. Plus you have off tomorrow."

"I guess, can you get me a water?"

He chuckles and nods, getting up and walking over to the mini fridge in the corner.

"So, do you have any news on you-know-who?" He asks, receiving a groan in response.

"I think he knows, to be honest. It's not like I'm blowing him off or anything, but his lifestyle just,, isn't for me."

Tom nods, walking back over to hand you an ice cold bottle.

"Thank you." You mutter, receiving a nod in response.

"Well, do you like him?" He questions, sitting back down.

You twist off the cap and don't hesitate to take a swig of cold water.

Once you feel somewhat replenished, you put the bottle on the ground and twist the cap back on.

"To be honest,,," you pause, "I do. I really really do. I just,, I wish he wasn't such a fuckboy. Because underneath that layer is a really kind individual.

"I would date him if he didn't play this,, character. I just-"

But you didn't get the chance to finish as the bell rang outside.

You threw your head back, "fuck my life!"

Tom giggled as he watched you stand up and hurry back out to the desk.

━━━━━━━━━▲━━━━━━━━━

As the last hour wound down, there wasn't much to do, but you still managed to keep yourself busy.

Once your shift finished, you went back into the break room, saying goodbye to the few coworkers that were in there on your way out.

Nobody knew about this whole 'situation' with Jadon except for a few people, each of whom you trusted with every fibre of your being. You trusted them to keep this within the group, knowing that if it got out your name along with 'Jadon Sancho's girlfriend' would be everywhere.

As you walked out to your car, you got a text from Tom.

'Did you see his new post on ig?'

You instinctively rolled your eyes. What new flex would it be this time?

'I'll look at it when I get home' you replied as you dug your keys out of your pocket and unlocked your door.

On the whole ride home, you couldn't help but think about him. Even if you tried to think of something else, your mind would somehow twist whatever you were thinking about to always go back to him.

Pulling into the driveway, you had finally managed to stop thinking about him, since you were now thinking about what to eat for breakfast, seeing as it was only 7:18am.

You turned the car off and opened the door, practically hauling yourself out of the driver's seat.

Today was the most difficult 8-hour shift you've done to date, which meant you were beyond worn out.

Your sore feet somehow carried you into the house where, no surprise, your best friend was nowhere to be found.

You both typically worked opposite shifts, so you rarely saw each other, but sometimes you could catch each other just as one was returning home and the other was leaving.

Though it defeated the whole purpose of owning a house together, it was kinda nice to have the space all to yourself after a tough shift.

As you sat down, rather forcefully, on the couch, you flipped your shoes off and grabbed the tv remote sitting on the coffee table. You fully stretched out as you turned the tv on.

This was the routine you had grown accustomed to: you got home, let yourself relax for a bit, then got to work doing something else for a while, then went to bed.

As you pressed the button to turn on Netflix for perfect background noise, your phone went off.

You ignored it, deciding to wait till you had the show set up to check it.

DING! DING! DING!

Notification after notification piled up until you couldn't take it anymore.

You angrily dug your phone out of your pocket and looked at it, the screen lit up with even more texts from your coworker group chat.

You roll your eyes and groan, shifting your attention back to getting The Great British Baking Show on.

Once it started playing, you finally read through the texts.

'Y/N!'

'HAS ANYTHING HAPPENED WITH JADON'

'PLS TELL US'

'omg look at his latest post'

'DAMNNN'

'yall did y/n look @ the post'

'idk but 👀👀'

'he looks like a fboy to me tbh lmaooo sorry Y/N'

You couldn't help but laugh at the last one.

Switching to instagram, you check to see what all the fuss is about.

The post in question? No surprise, a few photos of him shirtless on his friend's expensive yacht.

You roll your eyes, "my god Jadon."

Despite posting classic fuckboy photos on instagram, you couldn't help but get a few butterflies in your stomach.

You double tap on the photo, then go back to the groupchat, only for a new text to pop up.

Jadon ⚽🔥 hey 😛

Another eye roll.

'hey Jadon'

'I saw you liked my recent 👀👀'

Uh oh. This won't end well.

'yeah'

'do you like what you see? 😜'

There it is.

'eh, ig. cr7 has better abs, though.'

'sure, for now.'

'right. I'll hold you to that.'

'wish you would hold something else, if you know what I mean 😉'

Jesus Christ.

'haha. what were you even drinking in that photo?'

'something exotic 🍹'

'yeah, it looks it.'

'haha yeah. anyways, wyd?'

There it is. The holy grail of fuckboys. The three letters everyone dreads. Oh no. Oh god.

'relaxing, I just got home from work.'

'really? it's almost 8 in the morning.'

'mhm. I worked 11p-7a. I'm tired.'

'are you still working @ the hotel we met at?'

'mhm'

'niceee. I'll be in town tm if you wanna meet up'

'yeah? who's the new lucky girl you'll bring this time?'

'no one. it'll only be us.'

'right. that's what you said last time.'

'this time will be different. I promise. you off tm?'

'yeah'

'ok. meet me at our café.'

'I have things to do too, you know, it's not all ab you Jadon.'

'damn, ok. well, if you decide to come, I'll be there at 12:30.'

'ok.'

'see you then, boo 😘'

━━━━━━━━━▲━━━━━━━━━

12:15, you showed up early, as per usual. You were sitting at the table you and Jadon would sit at every time you came, aka the closest to the window.

12:30. You were watching out the window, not taking your eyes away. He was nowhere to be seen.

12:45. He still wasn't there. Why were you even surprised?

1:00. Still no sign of him. You were almost finished with your coffee, and you were getting restless.

1:15. Everyone who had been there when you arrived were long gone, all the tables filled with new customers. You probably looked pathetic.

1:30. An hour after he said he would meet you, and you were fed up. Why did you even bother?

1:35. Nothing. No new messages or anything. You were done.

You walked out, trying your best to conceal your anger. You should be used to this. You should've known. Over an hour of your life wasted.

Just as you get back to your car your phone goes off. With a quick glance, you can tell it's Jadon.

'hey! sorry, something came up. can you do next week? I wanna make it up to you.'

You couldn't believe your eyes. You wasted over an hour,,, for that.

'no, I can't. I'm actually busy next week, and the week after that, & every week for the rest of my life.'

'haha, thats funny. what day can you do next week?'

'I just told you, I'm busy. I just wasted an hour of my life that I could've used doing literally ANYTHING else just for you to say that something came up,, & it was YOUR fucking idea!

'I like to think I'm a patient person, but that just sealed the deal. my god Jadon, I knew you were a fuckboy, I mean, we both joked ab it, but I didn't think it was this bad.

'stop dragging me out like this. just say you're using me for sex and go. I'm sick of getting my hopes up just for you to let me down again. I'm over it, and I'm over you. please fuck off Jadon'

It was marked as read the second it was sent. The three dots would pop up, then disappear, then pop up again. It went on for 2 minutes.

The final result?

'I'm sorry. I never meant to hurt you.'

You left him on read.

━━━━━━━━━▲━━━━━━━━━

The next day you were back at work for a 3pm - 11pm shift. You had told everyone what happened, and they were angry and upset for you. A few were tempted to text him, but you told them that it would only escalate the already tense situation.

Around 10pm, you were winding down. There was only an hour left in your shift, and you had had a relatively slow day for once. And it seemed like it was going to be a normal shift.

You were sitting in the break room with some of your coworkers, watching a rerun of a golf game which you were, for some reason, invested in.

The bell rang outside, and although you were a bit upset to have to abandon the game, you weren't that upset, considering this was the slowest day you've had in a while.

As you walked out to greet the patron, your heart stopped and your stomach dropped.

It was Jadon, standing there with a white box and a teddy bear.

You glared at him, and a part of you filled with hatred, but the other part gushed at his gesture. He really was going to be the death of you.

"Hey, y/n. I'm really sorry about yesterday. I didn't mean to keep you waiting for over an hour. The reason why I didn't come was because I wanted to get you this."

He paused, gently setting the small box down on the desk, "I tried to get in quickly and pick this up, but the line was so long, I wanted to come and give it to you, but I figured I had kept you waiting long enough, so I called it off."

You're not convinced, but you wanna be. Every part of you wanted to forgive him,, but your stubbornness wouldn't let you.

He sees your shifty glance and sets the bear on the counter as well.

"I'm so so so sorry. I know I fucked up, and you have every right to be angry at me. But even if you never wanna see me again, can you please open it? Just for my sake?"

"If it'll make you leave faster." You respond, intending to sound bitter, but instead sounding shaky.

"I will. I know I can't keep promises, but this one I will. If you don't want to talk to me anymore, I will respect that."

You bite your lip and nod, looking down at the box and undoing the red ribbon. It looked very professional and well done.

As you lift the top off, your eyes widen and fill with tears. You can't help but slap a hand over your mouth.

Inside were all of the polaroids you've taken, ranging from the first time you hung out together, to a few months ago. There were ones of him playing football, and of you in various places doing a gesture that soon became an inside joke. You used to travel together all the time, you miss those days all the time.

The light blue camera used to take all of these photos was inside as well.

Jadon watched as you looked through the photos, a shy smile forming on his face.

"The camera still works, if you want to try it out." He said, voice barely above a whisper.

"Jadon, I-" you hesitated, and for the first time in your life, you were truly speechless.

"There's a, uh, there's a note on the bear." He muttered, looking down and scratching his neck.

You looked at him, and couldn't help but smile a bit. Only Jadon would do this.

Your attention turns to the bear, and sure enough, there was a note attached to its paw. Gently removing the handwritten note stuck to the paw, you read it carefully, clinging on to every word.

'Y/N,

I'm sorry if I hurt you yesterday. And I'm sorry if you feel that all we are is friends with benefits. I've always wanted more with you, but was too afraid to act.

I put up this fboy facade hoping I would attract someone who would be into,, that. But the one thing I didn't take into account was if I fell for someone.

Because my whole life changed when I met you.

I kept this act up, thinking you would be into it and fall for me, but that's not what happened. In fact, when the exact opposite happened, I was shocked.

Nobody liked the real me. That's why I started doing this, because that's what brought people in. And it worked, because it seemed as though everyone else fell for it, everyone except the one person I wanted.

And if I'm being honest, let's talk about the elephant in the room: we both know that I've loved you from the moment we met in this exact building 3 years ago.

You're all I've ever wanted. You're all I will ever want. I'm in love with you.

I'm willing to do whatever it takes to be with you, but it's up to you on whether or not you'll accept.'

A grin appeared on your face as tears streamed down your cheeks.

You looked up at him, a soft yet nervous expression on his face.

You came out from around the counter and threw your arms around him, burying your face in his neck.

"I'll take that as a yes, then?" He joked, making you laugh.

You look up at him. "On one condition."

"And what's that?"

"Stop being such a douche."

"Done. I don't need the facade when I have what I want."

------------------------

thanks for reading! this was my first footballer fic & im actually really proud of it! requests are open, and feel free to use one of the prompts I posted before!

this was for you anon, hope you liked it ;)

#jadon sancho #jadon sancho fanfiction #jadon sancho fanfic #jadon sancho fic #football #soccer #football fic #football fanfic #soccer fanfic #borussia dortmund #dortmund #fanfiction #fanfic #mine

42 notes · View notes

kirishwima · 4 years

Note

Hey! Can you do Valentine's day with Jumin x MC, except this time is she who had to work that day? She comes home and finds Jumin sleeping in the middle of all the surprises he prepared for her, pretty please? Thanks!!!

Sure, this is such a cute idea! I took a bit of liberty and went with an MC that’s working as a doctor because well, I’m a little biased ;u; hope that’s okay!

* The night before 14th of February, MC was lounging on the couch with Jumin, content to simply sit besides him and lay her head on his shoulder, Elizabeth the 3d taking her rightful place on his lap.

* He had one hand around MCs’ shoulders, rubbing soothing circles on her skin, his other hand stroking Elizabeth’s fur. The ideal night, if you asked him.

* “My love” he started, turning to place a quick kiss to MCs temple, “You’ll be home tomorrow night yes?”

* MC hummed, a teasing smile on her lips “Hmm...why, is there something important going on tomorrow?” she teased, giggling at the sudden frown on Jumin’s lips, the furrow in his brow his tell-tale sign of confusion.

* “Of course I’ll be free tomorrow Juju” she smiled, giving him a peck on the lips, “I’ll be working until evening, and I only have a couple surgeries scedhuled in the morning, so I’ll be home to celebrate our first Valentine’s together with you.”

* Jumin hummed in content, a small smile on his lips. Of course MC knew her husband would’ve a grand plan for their first Valentine’s day together, and she was eager to find out what it’d be-but even more so, she was eager to give him his present, a box skillfully hidden in the back of the closet for a while now.

* Happy with their plan, they both greeted the morning of the 14th with glee, Jumin singing a song under his breath as he got ready for work, MC hiding her smile behind her mug of coffee at the sight.

* They both tried to travel to their works together whenever possible, and today was no exception-Jumin sat with MC in the backseat, bidding Driver Kim a good morning as they entered the car, their fingers intertwined. MC tried to sneak some hints about tonights plans from Jumin, but to no avail-his lips were sealed shut, and he’d only give her a knowing grin whenever she asked.

* She even tried asking the rest of the RFA if they knew anything, bribing Seven with photos of Elizabeth the 3d-but as much as he’d begged for the photos, he genially knew nothing either, so MC was left to pout, folding her arms over her chest.

* Jumin laughed at her adorable gesture, kissing her as they reached her workplace. “You’ll find out tonight my love, and I promise you’ll be happy” he promised, bidding her goodbye as she exited the car to enter the hospital doors.

* Jumin was cheerful all through the day-which freaked Zen out, as he of course broadcasted his excitement for the day in the RFA messenger, posting significantly more emojis than usual.

* By 6 o’clock, he’d already finished all the work he had for the day, telling Jaehee she could take the day off too before heading out of the C&R building and rushing to get back home (Cue Jaehee dashing out of the building before he changed his mind, shocked she might actually get a full 8 hours of sleep tonight lmao)

* By 7 o’clock, he had everything said-a specific menu he asked the chef to start preparing the moment MC stepped home, reservations to a late night screening for a movie he saw MC gushing about in the messenger, a dozen gifts adorning their bed so she could open them after the movie, bouquets of her favorite flowers in every part of the house-he had everything set, along with his final gift, his big surprise that awaited them on the buildings terrace.

* Now all that was left was for MC to come home. He knew her job was demanding, and didn’t think much about her not being home yet, even though he was a little upset she hadn’t contacted him at all throughout the day. He was patient however, content to take this time to freshen up for their night, finding his best suit and putting on the cologne he knew MC loved on him.

* The final rays of sunshine were already leaving the sky, the pink hues giving way to darkness, and Jumin still awaited, a glass of wine in one hand, the other anxiously running through his hair.

* By 10pm he was terrified, all his calls to MC left unanswered. There was a gnawing worry building up in the pits of his gut, rising up like smoke all the way to his lungs, getting lodged in his throat-a million bad scenarios ran through his head like a nonstop cinema film, making him pace around the penthouse with furstration.

* Eventually he caved in and called the hospital, stating who he is and asking if MC was there, if she was okay-the secretary asked him to hold for a moment, the longest one in Jumin’s life, before telling him she’d connect him to the OR’s phone.

* He waited, confused as to why she’d do that, when a famiilar voice, the one he loved filled his ears.

* “Jumin, baby I’m so sorry!”

* MC’s voice was loud and frantic, yet it brought such relief to Jumin, simply to know that she’s alright, that she’s safe.

* “I was going to call you but I didn’t have the time to-we had an emergency come in, a multiple cars accident, with so many patients needing surgery and there weren’t enough people in the hospital since so many got the day off and-I offered to help but I should’ve contacted you I’m so sorry-”

* “Darling, it’s okay. It’s okay I’m-” Jumin sighed, sinking down on the couch, his legs suddenly weak, “I’m just glad you’re alright. Of course I’d want you to be right here next to me right now, but I know that you’d never rest unless you offered help to those that needed it. It’s okay just-come home soon. I miss you.”

* His brow furrowed when he heard a commotion on the other line, even a few giggles and whistles as MC shushed them.

* “J-Jumin, baby...I’m still in the operation room, the phone’s on speaker.”

* He felt his face redden, but couldn’t bring himself to be entirely flustered over this situation-at least now everyone in that room knew MC was his and his alone.

* “Well...just come home soon my love. I’ll be waiting for you.” he said before hanging up, enjoying MC’s flustered sigh as he did.

* With his mind at peace, he sank further on the couch, his heart beat slowing from its previously frantic race, his muscles unclenching, his eyelids dropping-it’d be alright if he closed his eyes for a moment right? MC wouldn’t be home for another hour at least....just for a moment....

* He woke to the sound of the door closing, his eyes snapping open. He looked around, bleary eyed as he turned to the clock on the wall, noticing it’s nearing midnight.

* MC tiptoed near him, holding her shoes in one hand, surprised to see him up.

* “Baby, no..” she sighed, coming to stand before Jumin, cusping his cheek in her hand. “Why didn’t you go to bed? You must be exhausted.”

* Jumin nuzzled his face in her hand, placing a kiss to the pulse point on her wrist. “I said I’d wait up for you, and I’m a man of my word” he huffed, “besides, our bed is covered in-” he halted that thought, noticing MC’s confused expression.

* “Well, nevermind that” he sat up, tugging MC onto his lap, “I’m just glad you’re here.”

* She kissed him, running her hands through his hair, massaging his scalp as he hummed in appreciation. “I’m sorry I made you wait so long. I should’ve contacted you first at least. I completely ruined our first Valentine’s didn’t I?” she said, an ironic smile on her lips.

* Jumin simply shook his head. “Never” he said whole-heartedly, “Just you being here in my arms makes me the happiest man alive. However, I’d like to show you something, before allowing you to rest from your tiring day. Is that okay?”

* MC nodded and Jumin sat up, holding her hand tight in his as he led her out of the penthouse and up the stairs to the terrace, opening the doors to the gardens, illuminated only by strings upon strings of fairy lights, making the flowers around them glow other-worldly. He led her all the way to the edge of the terrace, the view of the entire city beneath them, few buildings as tall as this giving them a perfect view of the night sky.

* Jumin checked his watch with a smile, bringing his arms around MC to warm her up from the winter air, resting his chin on the crown of her head. “You arrived home just in time darling. Please look to the sky...now” he said, and his final word coincided with a loud boom, before an explosion of colourful lights highlighted them both, filling the night sky with colour.

* “Fireworks!” MC beamed, looking to the sky with bright eyes. “Jumin did you-” she took note of the pink and red colours of the fireworks, how some formed hearts before sprinkling into coloured dust, “did you plan this?!”

* Jumin kissed the crown of her head, his hands tighter around her frame. “Of course”, he admitted, “It was to be the grand finale of the night, a sky full of love just for you but well, it’ll be the starting point of our night instead.”

* MC turned, ignoring the fireworks for a moment to lean up and properly kiss her husband, laughing between kisses. “You are absolotuely ridiculous, a wonderful, beautiful loving goof. I’d be happy with just you, like this, nothing else at all was necessary.”

* Jumin smiled into the kiss. “I promised you I’d make you happy, and as I said-I never go back on my word.”

* MC rolled her eyes, biting her cheek as she moved to hold Jumin’s hand in hers. “Speaking of happy...I also have a gift for you, and I refuse to end the night before giving it to you.”

* Jumin let her tug him back to the penthouse and into the bedroom, stopping for a moment to register all the gifts scattered on the bed, rolling her eyes with exasperated fondness as she turned to open the closet and dig the hefty box out and into Jumin’s hands.

* “It’s um, it’s a couple of things-definitely not on the same level as all of this” she said nodding to the bed-turned-Toys-R-Us, “but I hope you’ll like them nontheless.”

* Ignoring his protests of “but I’d love anything you give me”, she led him to the couch and sat cross-legged across him as he opened the box, bringing out the gifts one by one.

* They were all things that made her think of him, or things she heard him mention he’d wanted-a vintage edition of the necromicon, an introductory book of witchcraft and its history, a delicate glass lamp that when turned on would illuminate star alignments onto the walls and ceeling-items and trinkets that Jumin equally showed excitement and love towards, kissing MC as thanks for each one. And then, at the bottom of the box-a flyer for a local animal shelter.

* “I know how much you love Elizabeth the 3d” MC started to explain, fiddling with her hands in worry, “and-I love her too! I adore her, but I gave some thought to the circumstances of how we met, how you felt towards Elizabeth and-I thought maybe you’d like us to adopt a little kitty brother or sister for her to play with, together. An addition to our family that you can learn to love just as much as Elizabeth and-” she blushed at that, “-and me.”

* Jumin didn’t say anything. Instead he let the flyer down onto the table gently, leaning forward to take MC into a tight embrace.

* He couldn’t wait to make their little family just a little bigger.

* “Happy Valentines Day, my love.”

I went a little overboard with this hahah sorry ^^’

-send me mystic messenger headcanons/prompts for the characters to react to!-

#asks #anon #mystic messenger #mysme #mysme prompts #mysme headcanons #mystic messenger prompts #mystic messenger headcanons #mysme fic #mystic messenger fic #jumin han #mysme jumin #jumin x mc #Anonymous

77 notes · View notes

greencurry-tabeta · 3 years

Text

Good evening

スラマッマラム

遅くなったようやく落ち着いた^_^

英語で書く。長い1日やったけど単純。複雑なことは日本語に甘える。

We had a electricity shut down today. From 9-10am and 8-10pm

Thus, last night I planed to get up early and run and go out in early morning.

I woke up at 6am with my alarm. But I couldn’t go running. I went back to sleep.

And then I woke up at 7.30am and then prepare myself.

Then, nagetto-Chan texted me whether I go down while we cannot use the electricity. I didn’t want to tell her that I was plannning to go out. So I replied her, we don’t have to go down. I think everyone is sleeping. And then she went back to sleep. なんでこうなるかというと朝から放送で何時から電気使えんから降りてくる人は降りてきてってゆうアナウンスが15分おきになっとったから。

And then Ibhave registered the light refreshment. Therefore I down stairs at 8am. But still there was nothing . I waited 20min.

I could eat this with free. It was so nice😁😁

And I left campus at 8.20 and walked to the station. I got my personal best 20min.

And I got the train. Today I supposed to go to see around the campus. So yea.

First, I went to the university which I wanna take my degree. I arrived and I talked to the security guard and asked whether I can see around the campus. He answered no cuz it is holiday. since then I have forgotten about that.

I just walked around the campus. I drank teoh ice for the first time

It was too hot so 👍 good

And I decided to go back. I waited for the bus around 15min. But my cards balance was zero. I was told bus driver to top up my card somewhere. So I couldn’t get ride this one. I went to the 7-Eleven and top up .

After that I have little bit time until the mext bus will come. So I went to the Chinese restaurant to get something eat. I have heard that we can eat fresh pao in the morning. So w bought a pork one

It was good.

And I texted the counselor of the university when I can go and I will go next week.😇😇😇

Then, Inokanned to go to the other one. I waited to the bus stop . But the bus ignited me what a hell.so I decided not to go

I visited bassar because I wanna eat roti. But when I went to there everyone close the store so I couldn’t get anything

Then I got massage from my friend

Do you wanna go somewhere

I answered

I am already in somewhere.

And we decided ti meet.

W hole I wait for her I ate toooooo expo tentative ice cream the owner was not good and also the price was not good

I am regretting.

After that I felt hungry. Therefore I went to the local restaurant

I ate roti Chanai for the first time. It was only 1.4ringgit. So nice la

After We met and went shopping. I got this clothes in 30rm area. And decided to buy, but it was 50. I went to back to the shop and check, the place was more than 30. I learned to check the price before I buy.

Anyway, this is so cute. I will wear this everyday 🥲🥲😅😅😭😭😭😭😭

Okay.......

And we went back to the station. And went to the grocery store. I bought some vegetables and fruits and spaghetti. I used too much money so I will save money this week.

After I reached campus, I cut my watermelon. Then suddenly light was turned off.

Oh no. Cuz according to the announcement it supposed to start at 9.....

I was in the pantry and the elderly woman came here and sh started to eat her dinner. She ate outs meals. She gave me this. It was sweet. After that we went down and talked

We could get free meal today due to this. I got three rice. I ate two already and the last one I will eat later.

この間すごい楽しかった雷すごかった今まででトップに躍り出るくらい。

そして早く終わるのかと思ったらそれが4時間つづぎした。

Like this.

つかれたた。。いろんな人とはなしたけどけつぎょく最後までこの人らになって、いろんな人集まってきてなしてました。

科目の英語が話す英語になった実感はありました。意識せずに理解もできるようになったし前よりも上達は感じる。きっと次のステップは惹きつける喋り方をすること。私はいろんな人に話しかけるけど結局基本情報しか言えん、自己紹介で終わるみたいな感じ、、面白みのない人間なんやろうなって、今日会った子は上手くみんなを惹きつけとってすごいと思った。次の目指すは彼女です。4時間暑い中待ってこれはすごおんです。

そして友達同士が亀裂入ってるのにもしる、今日ひとつも口聞いてない。はははは

そんで一時前にようやく、、、！！シャワー久々に浴びたやく2日ぶり、アホよな、、、洗わんかったらどうなるか、、、、わかりました。

眠いので寝ます。明日は、、、^_^

おや

1 note · View note

adolanables · 5 years

Text

The City - Chapter 9

Warnings: Mentions of violence

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Why the hell had you let this happen to you? Like – actually – what the fuck? You had made this giant move into the city with all the confidence in the world and you had actually let a stupid BOY fuck the first two months of your time here up SO much. The main reason you had moved here was to make some boss bitch career moves. Admittedly, things at work were going okay, but once you got home, the sadness and prominent anxiety overwhelmed you. The skin on the edges of your fingers was bloody and scabbed over as you constantly picked at your skin to calm yourself down.

It had been TWO weeks since you had seen Grayson. TWO. You hadn’t gone this long without at least hearing from him since the two of you had met and you had convinced yourself that it was finally over. Maybe he was truly too embarrassed about the drug thing to ever face you again – or maybe something bad had happened. You really weren’t sure. The Ethan sightings had also been few and far between, but you figured this was probably because of how much time you were spending at work. Since your social life was failing, you had no problem putting your all into your work – and people were noticing. Although you were ecstatic with the new recognition at work, you just couldn’t shake the horrible feelings when you were alone at night. It was like as soon as you shut the door to your apartment a dark shadow wrapped itself around you, only leaving when you stepped back outside.

The weekend had finally arrived and you were dreading it more than a Monday. At this point, work was where you were thriving and having the most fun – the last thing you wanted was a weekend completely alone. The point of the week that was specifically designed for spending time with friends and relaxing. Two things you were absolutely incapable of doing. You had purposely stayed late at work, trying to minimize the time you had to spend alone, but eventually you were forced to go home. This was so strange for you. Your entire life you had been an introvert – someone who literally recharged by being by herself. But the last two weeks made you feel like the only thing in the world you truly wanted was someone to come home to.

The train ride home was too quick for your liking, and because it was so late you decided to catch a cab from the station back to your place. It was only about three blocks, but you weren’t willing to risk it. By the time you pushed open the door to your apartment, it was almost 10pm and you were grateful that you were already exhausted and ready for bed. Quickly heating yourself up some chicken and rice, you turned on a YouTube video and curled up on the couch. These moments in your life had become a part of your routine and having a routine was important to your sanity. Something you once found so rewarding and calming, you were now forcing yourself to do to retain a sense of normalcy.

Plate and utensils washed, couch tidied up, showered, lotion rubbed in, and it was finally time for bed. Thankfully, you still found peace in the softness of your comforter and the way your mattress hugged itself around you. The moment you lay your head on your pillow, you were out. -

*BANG BANG BANG*

The loud noise reverberating through your apartment woke you suddenly. Looking around, confused, and in complete darkness – your heart was racing and you weren’t sure if those were gunshots or you were dreaming. Honestly, living in a city you really just never knew.

*BANG BANG BANG*

This time it registered with you that someone was knocking – no, pounding – on your door. You waited a few seconds before the loud knocking started happening again and you knew you had to do something. Quickly gathering your fluffy white comforter up around your body, you tip-toed up to the door and peeked through the peep-hole. You were fully expecting to see a scary blonde haired man with an entourage of other large men by his side through the small opening. Instead, you didn’t see anything? Just the hallway. You were so confused, maybe whoever was doing this had walked aw-

*BANG BANG BANG*

Closer to the door, you realized the knocking was coming from the bottom of the thick piece of mahogany wood between you and whatever was out there. Tip-toeing over to the kitchen counter, you picked up the pepper spray that was on your keys and yelled through the crevice near the bottom of the door, “WHO IS THERE?”

The banging stopped, but was quickly replaced with small, spread out knocks. You thought you even heard a small whimper, but you weren’t sure. To be honest, you really wanted whoever this was to screw off so you could get back to sleep, but you had to know what was going on. Taking a deep breath, you opened the three locks on your door and quickly flung the heavy door open. A small scream escaped your mouth as the person who had been leaning against your door fell completely into your doorway. It took all of two second to realize it was Grayson at your feet. Relief and anger came over you at once, but when he slowly rolled over to look up at you, everything turned into heartbreak.

His sweet, perfect jawline was covered in bloody gashes and what looked to be the beginnings of a deep set bruise. His eyes were no different, starting to swell shut. Dried blood covered the tip of his nose and a trail down his mouth and the front of his neck. His lips were both bloody and swollen. The shirt he wore was covered in blood and dirt, there were holes tattered all over it and his jeans looked no better. He wore no shoes – only his socks. “Grayson, oh my god wha-“ You couldn’t find the words to say as the man you saw to be so strong and sure curl up into a small ball on the floor of your apartment and start to shiver.

You weren’t expecting him to be able to respond to you anytime soon, so you shut the door – re-locked everything and kneeled down on the floor next to him. “Grayson, can you stand? We need to get you into the shower.”

He only very weakly nodded, starting to push himself up off the floor, but grabbing onto your shoulder for balance. You helped the large man as best you could get to a standing position and into the bathroom. He rested against the counter top as you helped him remove his ruined clothes. You shut your eyes tightly as the red marks and cuts on his chest made their appearance. God, you wanted to kill whoever did this to him – he looked so weak. Your heart was banging against your rib cage at the sight of him – oh did it hurt you to see this strong man so defeated.

Deciding to leave your underwear that you were sleeping in on your body, you started the hot shower and helped him in. He sat down on the floor of the shower, letting out small moans as the hot water ran over his open wounds. His bruised hand slithered around your ankle, gripping onto the only piece of you he could find.

Getting to work on rinsing off the dirt and dried blood, you moved quickly. Rubbing a calming hand over his broad shoulder – a part of him that wasn’t injured. You shampooed his hair and lathered body wash over the areas he could handle it. His hand never left your ankle and the grip only seemed to be getting tighter. As you finished bathing him, you leaned down next to the broken boy and pulled his hand from you – placing a soft kiss to his tattered knuckles.

Getting him out of the shower proved to be much more difficult with the added factor of water and that he weighed at least 100 pounds more than you. With a few slips and readjustments, you managed to get him out and dried off. “Do you think you can drink some water if I help you?” You ran a towel through your damp hair and tied your fluffy pink robe around your body, leaving your damp undergarments to soak the fabric.

He nodded at you again softly. He had managed to get his eyes open just slightly and you could see the pain in them. Yes, you had been incredibly angry at him, but you couldn’t deny him right now – he needed you.

Once Grayson had fully dried off, you had helped him into your bed – there was no use in trying to get him into clothes at this point. There was nothing sexual about what was happening. He was severely hurt and every small bump or movement was painful to him. He managed to drink a glass of water with you pouring it into his mouth, but the contact of the water to his busted lips made him let out a throaty scream. “Shh, shh, Gray. It’s okay.” Your soothing hand once again found it’s place on his broad shoulder – making circular patterns into his soft skin. He subconsciously leaned into your touch and closed his eyes at the soothing motion.

When the glass was empty, he threw his head back into your pillow and shut his eyes tightly. You had managed to patch up all of the open cut wounds, but you were fully expecting your perfectly white bed set to be stained red in the morning and you really didn’t care. You helped Grayson swallow a Tylenol PM and held his calloused hand as he slowly drifted to sleep.

#grayson #ethan #grayson dolan #ethan dolan #grayson dolan imagine #grayson dolan x reader #grayson dolan ethan dolan #grayson dolan smut #grayson dolan fanfic #grayson dolan fluff #grayson dolan mad #adolanables #the city #fan fic #fan fiction #dolan twin #dolan twins #dolan twin smut #dolan clan

113 notes · View notes

maorane · 5 years

Text

Encounter - I.M (Changkyun)

Chapter 6 : Hesitation

Prologue - Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 - Chapter 4 - Chapter 5 - Chapter 6 - Chapter 7 - Chapter 8

I opened my eyes, looking around me to grab my phone. It was 3am and Changkyun was still sleeping. I sat on the bed and looked at him. What happened few hours ago looks like a mirage. I shook my head and went out of the bed slowly to not wake him up, put my clothes on and left the room. There was still 2 weeks left for that tour and I just put myself in the most uncomfortable situation.

-Few hours later-

It was early in the morning when we all arrive at ABC studio for Good morning america. Today was really a busy day and for once I was happy about it, because i didn't have time to think much about last night and ever better, I had less time to spend with Changkyun. We were in the same building, same room, but there was way too much people and things to do. After the show, everyone got permission to take some time off since the next concert wasn't before 2 days. My teammates decided to go on a road trip and visit the city and for the first time i didn't think twice before accepting their offer. I needed to stay busy to not think about him. Was I trying to avoid him ? Yes..Was I proud of it ? No

1:15pm :" hey..where are you ?" 1:20pm : " Can we meet ? I need to talk to you" 2:10pm : " Sorry I'm out with my teammates...talk to you later 'kay ?" 2:12pm : What's wrong ? - no answer-

I was feeling bad, I didn't want to act like that toward him but i didn't know what to do. During the rest of the day, i tried to enjoy my time with my friends, did some shopping , and food tour. Until one of the girl show the pics that the members took under big screen, exclaiming how we barely meet then since we also went there. But i couldn't really focus on the conversation, too busy to look at his face on those pictures. They all had neutral expressions but somehow his looks darker, sadder. I was probably overthinking but my guilt feelings came back at me.

It was finally 11pm when i went back to my hotel room. I was exhausted after that long day of walking and all i wanted to do was to take a long shower and go straight to bed for the rest of my life. But my plan got avorted when I heard knocks on the door. "A minute please " I removed my bathrobe and put my short and t-shirt on and went to open the door, my hair still wet from the shower. I wasn't surprise to see Changkyun standing in front of me. It's not like i could avoid him for the rest of my life. I moved on the side and let him enter, before going back to tidy my room a bit since all my new items i bought were all over the place. After a long silence I was about to ask him if he wanted a drink but his voice was the first one to comes out "Are you trying to avoid ?" I remained silent, not sure that the answer i would give him was the best idea. Changkyun came next to me and made me turn so i could face him.

"Andrea ? What's wrong ? Do you regret what happened last night ?" I shook my head trying to avoid his eyes, no matter the fact that i was older than him, i felt myself so small, so vulnerable having to face the truth. I closed my eyes and he cupped my face and put his forehead against mine, i could feel his hot breath on my lips and it didn't help me at all. "So why ? Why did you just leave like that ? Why did you ignored my texts ?" "I...I told you...This shouldn't happen..We can't happen Changkyun..not like that" those words were harder for me to say that for him to hear but he didn't let go on me, instead his lips went on mine.

" But i love what we have right now. Even if it's for a short time, let me have this, let me have you." Again, his lips went on my neck and the spell started to work. Reason and logic left the room letting desire and passion take control. It was bad, but it felt so good.

#changkyun scenarios #changkyun #changkyun smut #changkyunxreader #monsta x smut #monsta x scenarios #monsta x #monsta x fanfic #monsta x angst #i.m smut #i.m x reader

33 notes · View notes

y4s2-20192020 · 4 years

Photo

Phase 3 : Drawing a crowd

in order to know more about the city within the city, in the previous phase, I have talked to several people who take parts either big or small in the context of Silom. From the residence to the police officer, and to the salary man working day to day in this urban context. However, there are one thing they have in common is, they all have experience the time when once a year, the ancient city open its gate to welcome the believers from everywhere to come and pay respect to a festivities dedicated to the prime goddesses of Hinduism. And that festival is called, the Navratri festival.

Link to full resolution

The last night of the Navratri festival parade occupies the inner 4 main roads along the context as hilighted in brown from 6pm-2pm closing the traffic coming from all sides and turns the whole chunk of city into a pedestrian path. Chronologically, the timeline of the event starts right here at the corner of Pan rd. To Silom rd. During the late noon of the day people will start to come into the premisses around the blocks to find a seat or prepare for a worship table. Before around 5, the ceremony inside the temple will commence including getting the carriages ready, and prepare the god’s statue and prepare the medium. After all is prepared the parade will start to travel out along the road. It is consist of 8 parades mainly on worshipping gods. 3 of them are a god’s medium and another 5 is a carriages with god’s statue. The parade and crowds will occupy the 4 main streets for the night. Then, disappear without a trace in the next morning.

Due to the circumstances I have took the advantage of the situation to describe the events using the overlaying technic onto the context to show the coexsistence of the city and the ceremony. Each of the picture shows the streets and pedestrian and how the line of that had been blurred out by the festivities. Each of the location are obtained from the people that I’ve talked to, as a memoirs or remnant of the context to them.

From the interview and the footage from many sites that I will show later in the presentation, I am able to calculate the crowd intensity into this dotted diagram.

The timeframe that I have set in between the intensity plotting is the first one is between 6pm-8pm the second one is from 8-10pm and the third one is from 10pm to around 1 am. On the first phase you can see that the crowd clutters along the transportation hub BTS or the furtherest other kinds of tranportattion can go such as this Silom intersection and this intersection. Also people circulating mainly on Pan rd to get ready for the ceremony.

The second time frame shows how the crowds are being put to the side of the street right here. Since the parade is coming this way, the people and the authorithies are starting to get ready for the parade. In contrary to the other side which the parade arrives later, are still chaotic. The last timeframe shows most of the crowds are being put aside but we can see the intense cloud of people right back to where it start to see the grand finale. Also the intersection and the BTS are getting crowded as well due to the people travelling back.

The proposition of the project as follows. In short, the most crucial moments as seen from the accumulated information is the moment the crowd get to meet the god. Which in this term is a popular figure that people gravitates to. By study that moment. Of the festivities might allows us to understand more the regulations and how a set of rules can be applied to facilitate the festival futher.

I then take a step back to study the other popular figure and how is their moments with crowds look like in order to further continue mine. Here are some of the other encounters from a different time. This one is in 1961 so you can see that as the time passes, the ideas of security towards the figure change as well.

As you can see clearly from the pope one that with the similar title as queen, the proximity of the encounter had changed a lot throughout the age.

So i started to look into several moments of the festival, each is from when the crowd meets the mediums or the carriages. The density of crowds and the way they approach each figure are somehow different due to the vast popularity on several figures.

Seeing better from the section for example, the right corner is the medium of the Kali goddess. One of the ,most fierce in Hindu beliefs, the reaction of the people towards the medium when compared to the one on the left side or the one below is drastically different.

From that i divided the character I’ve seen in the crowds into 6 groups with 16 personnas which represents the main characteristic of the crowd.

youtube

In this video, it shows the choreography of each personnas and to make it more convincing, where to find them in the crowd.

The next video shows the moments when as seen in the elevation shown before, but are graphically moving to gives the sense of movement and choreography.

youtube

From the crowd videos and diagrams I have started to disected each moments of meet into a more detailed diagram. For now i have studied a few below. The first one is the moments when crowds meets medium. You can see that the force is pulling the crowd forward. Minimising the diagram helped me see the movement clearer and once being overlayed can gives the sense of a structured movements.

The second one is the interaction of crowds to the moving carriages. As you can see the carriages are moving forward so that there’s not much interaction towards the carriages. But from the side, you can see in the documentary that people are aiming to throw a garland. It might be a random action but it has the objectives and had to be done at a certain distance.

The last one is the interaction to the still carriage. Which is the combination between the first two. People have more interaction to it and are circulate around the carriage as seen to gives offerings to gods.

So from the first two you can see that the digram retained can be a bit chaotic and out of order. So I’ve tried to look into the set of rules that could be apply to this situation. Maybe the different walk path could be set around the carriage so that the act of approaching can facilitate more people. So that the the the movement can get as many more people to be close to the figure as possible.

#9 Saimai Thanjira Vimonanupong #tijn van de wijdeven #Phase 3

3 notes · View notes

hoopdiddies · 5 years

Text

I'm Not Over You //Ben Hardy x Reader (Part 9)

A/N: All the fact checking had me reeling to be honest and this is one long-ass chapter, longer than the one where I said 'it's the longest I've written' but actually this wins the competition. I've used some lyrics from the song Photograph cos I felt like it would go nicely with the flow plus I am weak with hospital scenes because of the distresses that occur within it but I tried ya know ¯_(ツ)_/¯ It's a little messy and dramatic on a side note because I had to deal with some outside disturbances as well and my mind was on other things 😔 But again, thank you guys for supporting this series! Your feedbacks mean a lot ♥ Tag list is always open!! (seriously, I need more people to tag xd)

Summary: You had always loved Ben ever since you the two of you met in university and became the best of friends. That feeling went out like a candle flame when you parted ways until he re-entered your life...but this time with someone who has already occupied his heart.

Warnings: That angst from 8? Yeah, it just upgraded, fluff if you, like, use a microscope, explicit description of blood and injuries, swearing but I kept it to a minimum, mentions of death but there's actually no death. Melodrama, ig? Sorry, I had a hard time writing consistently this week ^^'

WC: 6.5k (Someone got carried away.)

Tags: @haendel-me-with-care

@mrsdoradominguez-barnes

@mickmoon

@lakef

@mrsmazzello

@valeriecarolinaw

@queen-turtle-boiii

@loveandbeloved29

@hardzzellos

Parts: 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

"Someone please help! Help us! "

"Bloody bastard just drove off without even stopping! "

"Are you fu- you left your phone?! He's barely clinging on to life!! Ask a random person to dial 911!"

"Oh god, what- what do we do- his head, his freaking head! There is so much blood right now!"

"D-don't move his neck! He's critical!"

"Rosy. Rosy. Calm down...he has to be fine..he should be... "

"An ambulance is on its way!"

"His head is fucking bloody! Do you even want- fuck! Someone help here! Someone, please help! "

"Is he even breathing?! "

"Oh god, Y/N! He's not- he's not! "

"You better not be joking around!"

"Joe! He is bloody dying and you think I'm fucking joking?!"

"He has no pulse as well..."

"I got to- I have to make an attempt to resuscitate him. "

"Are you sure?"

"We're not waiting for that goddamn vehicle! If I don't do it, he's going to die!"

"Wake up, Ben! Please, wake up..."

Blur. That's what everything was. A huge, uncoordinated, focal blur. A sea of people had crowded the scene like a flock of sheep ready to graze on the pasture, except the only green they had for their eyes was the sight of six, dreadful friends taking it in their hands to keep the seventh one grounded while they wait for professional help.

The ones with flashing cameras hoisted up high to document the scene disgusted you down to the pits of your stomach and you had wished for them to scatter away. You all, especially you had to bear the agony of seeing him motionless on the asphalt ground– without breath, skin drained of color while the only color highlighted in the spectrum was the copious but graphic amount of blood that had tainted the spot he was lying in– his hair coated in the sticky, sanguinary puddle, creating a traumatizing mix of blond and deep red that you now couldn't forget. The tears pricking from your eyes when you had given him mouth to mouth mingling with his bleeding forehead.

He had lost all consciousness at a maximum.

You had ached to cradle his body right there and then but had you acted on impulse; it would've worsened the situation.

Medics had filled in the scene seconds after you had given Ben a well-thought out CPR undeterred by your raging adrenaline. He was then brought into the ambulance with Rosy tagging along to be there when they rush him into the ER. You had gone after with the others in Gwilym's car, your shaking hands coated with drying blood -his drying blood- as you made your way to the hospital in a blistering cruise.

You're still in your dress, only topped with Joe's designer blazer to shield you from the cold and a warm, half-empty cup of brew situated between your palms partially substituting the natural heat of your skin, waiting quietly in the lounging room. They had transferred Ben to a private room after performing an operation on his head and scanning him afterwards. One of the emergency doctors remarked that if it weren't for your initiative to follow first aid protocol and give him immediate resuscitation before help had arrived– he would have gone ten minutes early.

You've been waiting an hour and a half for the doctor to step out of the room and deliver the news about his condition. And while you do that, Joe and Lucy have gone off to collect a fresh pair of clothing from the hotel for you to change into. Rosy is stood at the entrance making some calls, Gwilym and Rami have gone back to their respective hotels to change clothes and come back for the news.

You felt light hearing that comment but it's nothing compared to the aftermath of the accident. It was a hit-and-run and the driver didn't even step on his breaks or bother to stop to take responsibility.

Rami's blazer that had been used to delay Ben's bleeding has been given back to him for dry cleaning. To complicate the situation, you're supposed to be boarded on a plane back to England eight hours from now yet that's something you have to cross out from the bucket list, entirely. You're not going anywhere unless Ben heaves out a single sigh of life.

Not a single step out the fucking institution unless he opens those eyes.

Unless he parts his lips.

Unless he says your name.

You owe it to him for saving your life, nearly costing his.

And it's just 2 in the morning.

You put down the cup on the space next to you, bringing your hands up to your lowered head, underneath your eyes watering from all of that's happened tonight.

"We're back." Two figures stand before you minutes after your eyelids have fluttered shut in despair. You lift your head to be met with Joe and Lucy in their casual clothes, smiling sadly at you with paperbags in hand.

You return that smile with a much weaker one. They settle the bags down and Joe sinks down on one knee in front of you, taking your face in his hands gently while he peeks up at you. "I see the news isn't out yet. You can change, we'll take care of it."

"You sure?" You mumble quietly. He nods and you prolong a sigh as you sit up, getting tenderly lulled into a hug by Lucy. "He's gonna be okay." She expresses definitely as she rubs your back. You thank her for the reassurance before taking one of the bags that contains your clothes.

Pulling the hem of your sweatshirt in place, you couldn't wait to escape the lavatory. It smells of newly applied bleach and the pungent odor is plain nauseating. You close the door with the bag in hand on your way out but freeze in your spot as a certain, exclusive news breaks out in the TV screen above you.

"Just 10pm tonight, Bohemian Rhapsody and EastEnders star, Ben Hardy, has reportedly been gravely involved and injured in a hit-and-run just outside of Wallis Annenberg Center during the ongoing Vanity Fair after party. Sources said that he had dashed headlong down the traffic-jammed streets to what they said was an attempt to save co-star's, Joe Mazzello, date from an incoming vehicle– which he had succeeded in as he failed to save himself–" The rest of the news anchor's words go unprocessed in your head as you hurriedly trace your way back to the lounging area, unwilling to hear recurring reports at yours or anyone's expense.

It already hurts enough that you think it's partly your fault for acting so careless.

By now, the attending physician should be out and conveying the news to Lucy and Joe and as you arrive– he is, hands in his lab coat pockets, informing them in the most serious of tones.

They see you approaching and you ask immediately, words stumbling out of your mouth like perceivable beats. "Doc, how is he? How's Ben?"

With Lucy and Joe already informed about it, the doctor decides to tell you himself to save them the hassle. "He should be fine soon. However I must be frank with you, miss," your heart loses a beat for a fraction of a second at the suspense rising, "he flat lined twice in the ER. It took three sets of defibs to get his heart beating again." Hearing him break to you that Ben was a simple step away from death as they tried to treat him drains the warm color palette in your face, even with the affirmation that he's going to be alright; knowing there were two moments in which he had slipped in and out of life at the same time just upsets your stomach.

The doctor continues with his report, telling you that he's suffered from a mild to severe head trauma caused by the blunt force when he had his scalp dragged along the asphalt. Apparently he fissured the the near front of his skull and underwent neurosurgery for it. You quickly get the idea, having studied a series of medical topics of course, but it doesn't invalidate the fact that it still sounds like a bad thing.

The doctor sighs and adds. "Although he bled internally at a minimum, he's lucky to have bled externally for the most part."

Forming a steeple of your fingers and stealing a quick glimpse of Lucy and Joe, you gulp hard. "How long 'til he wakes up?"

"I'd say in about 48 hours. His scan results after the surgery showed promise for a stable recovery though he might wake up a little dazed at first due to the moderate concussion," at least you're getting the assurance that he's waking up, "your friend has a thick skull. He'll recover in time, but with short-term effects."

48 hours. Not enough time for you to stay or leave.

"Can we see him? Right now?" Setting your expectations to the highest, you ask with a glimmer of hope and the doctor approves, minding you to turn down the lights in the room as Ben would likely be sensitive to it by the time he wakes. "A nurse will come by and check on him every once in a while as well."

You nod weakly, thanking him professionally as you gradually hang your head in disappointment. He wishes Ben a speedy recovery before turning on his heels, leaving you to it.

Lucy brings her short hair up in a pigtail, asking as she lifts up her share of the paper bags. "Are we going in now? I mean, the doc said we're able to." She vaguely points at the door of the room and you and Joe swap looks before deciding on it. You collect your items from the seats and draw in breaths as you follow suit, stepping into the room and being welcomed by the almost odorless whiff of paint and medicine; along with the light to moderate blow of the air conditioner.

As the door clicks close, you stand motionless yet internally trembling at the heartbreaking sight of Ben lying unresponsive, surrounded by various machines working to keep him alive. Flanking his bed are the heart monitor -fully functional- and a medical ventilator from which he is breathing from. He's hooked up to an IV bag with a breathing tube put into his mouth, his left arm is propped upon his abdomen but protected around a plaster and supported within a blue arm sling and lastly, his head is wrapped in a layer of roller bandage– the giveaway of his major injury.

"Y/N..." Joe cooing breaks you off from your vacant gaze but you hand him a forlorn eye as bring yourself to Ben's side, glancing over his limp body. He's taken quite a hit to have fractured his arm like this. His complexion didn't appear as livid as it is now and marking his bottom lip -which has lost that luscious red tint as well- is a small bruise, parted from his upper lip as he involuntarily breathes through the tube in his mouth. You don't hear his slow exhales but the normal rise and fall of his chest consoles a small part of you; the stable beeping of the heart monitor being the only occuring noise in the room. Concerned with how awfully quiet you've gone, Lucy and Joe give each other fitting looks as they share the same thought on the situation. As one of them begins to step close to ensure you're taking it well, you pipe up before them, your once honey-laced voice diminished to a monotone. "It's...not my fault."

"Of course, it's not," Lucy, being the one who has taken that step close, tenderly agrees but you add.

"It's not but it feels like it is."

Now Joe steps up next but stop as you add once more.

"And I told him I wanted to forget him and for him to do the same." Now some tears are inevitable.

"Y/N-"

"As impractical as it is to think about it now, but what if he does?" your hand has now hovered over him, the nerves of the pads of your fingers itching to skim themselves over his free hand, "I don't want to go. But I have to and he's still not gonna wake up by the time I leave."

His condition just yearns for your touch but you don't want to lay a hand on him just yet, out of the fear that you might hurt a small part of him.

Joe sighs softly as he puts his hands on your shoulders, rubbing them with ease. "Why don't you just email the institution about it? Tell them you're gonna have to delay because of an urgent matter."

"I can do that, but only a day after. I can't take long."

"Rami and Gwilym are on their way," Lucy reminds as she gets off her phone from messaging them, "with some food and water."

"None of us are burning the midnight oil then," Joe stretches his limbs and returns to the couch to take a moment to relax, eyes snapping wide as he remembers something. "By the way, Y/N. If you spilled your heart out to him earlier, did you include the bit where our relationship was all but pretend?"

Surely the stare you and Lucy are sharing towards him could render the atmosphere painful but you answer regardless of the topic, shaking your head as you turn your attention to Ben once more. "No. But he's bound to question it. That is if he remembers what happened."

Lucy rests her hand on her hip as she glances at the heart monitor, the waves tempting her eyes to follow them. "Doctor never implied anything about amnesia."

The three of you fall silent again with you locking your gaze at the man who didn't want to let you go. Who chased you down a busy highway knowing he'd bite the dust if he did and ended up saving you at the expense of his own well-being.

And life.

And his own soul.

He'll recover in a short period, yes. But when you had gently grazed your trembling hand over his bloodied head in the middle of the street, it was as if he was bound to never wake up. A visual you want to shake off for the sake of composure.

Joe and Lucy take notice of your stilled silence again, their expressions low-spirited. Taking small steps towards you, Lucy wraps her arms around your shoulders from behind and pulls out a certain object from her back pocket, slipping it to you. "Found this in the inner pocket of Ben's tainted blazer when the doctors gave his clothes to us."

You cast your gaze to what she's holding and hear your heart shatter at what it is. You slowly take it from her and sweep your thumb over it.

Ben's share of your Homecoming picture.

And behind it, the same date and continuation of what was written on your half.

You piece it in your mind and feel your eyes cloud with tears, a droplet making a small patter as it lands on the polaroid.

He kept it. In his blazer. He brought it along with him.

_I'm not going... anywhere at all. _

"But I am." You mutter as opposed to the words in your head. For as long as you love him and he doesn't in the way you do, distancing yourself is something that needs to be done to make sure you finally let go. You'd stick around but it would further fragment your soul.

Just in time to tear you from reaching your breakfing point, the door creaks open to two men and a red-haired woman, two of whom are grasping paper bags containing some food and water and one with an overwrought look, respectively.

Lucy leaves your side and walks over to Rami's, kissing his cheek and helping them unload their items on the coffee table. Gwilym gives the three of you, and Rosy who had followed in behind them, an individual hug– asking you about Ben's condition as he lays eyes on him.

You assure him of a smooth recovery and it unknots the lump of worry he's under.

"Oh, Ben, baby... " Breaks down Rosy, who whizzes past you to tear up over her injured fiance. She gazes down painfully at the man before her and delicately fondles his blanch cheek, eyes narrowed to the point where her face has contorted to a scowl which she throws directly at you. "This is all your fault. "

Your brows crease at her in absolute confusion. "What are you talking about?" Sensing that an altercation is about to take place, the rest stumble quiet in preparation for the worst. Joe readies himself to butt in in case it escalates further.

"What did you say to him?" She asks you in a form of a hiss.

"Nothing! I-"

"He chased you down! You must have said something that set him off!" Her demanding voice echoes off the walls, overlaying the beeping and whizzing of both the heart monitor and ventilator. You begin swearing to her that you didn't say anything of the sort but trail off as you realize that what you had actually said, was something that indeed hurt him.

You draw your lips between your teeth and clench your fist, unable to respond with the truth, fearing it might just fuel the fire.

"That's- that's not important now." You shake your head dismissively and turn around.

"It is. You led Ben out into the street, agitated."

"Rosy, please. Can we not talk about this now? We're squabbling in front of an unconscious man-"

"Okay girls. Our boy is out cold but that doesn't mean he can't hear, right?" Eager to quench the growing conflict, Gwilym slides in between the dangerous proximity you've put yourselves in and you huff an apology.

On the other hand, Rosy does the complete opposite. "No, Gwilym. He has been acting strange for weeks and to think tomorrow's supposed to be our wedding! And this is all because of her."

Gwilym turns to her firmly and tries calming - or rather shutting her up for the sake of the peace Ben needs to heal- her down. "We're not throwing fingers here. I know tomorrow's the day and you don't want to put him under pressure, right? I don't think he's going to succumb to waking up if this goes on."

Rami, Lucy and Joe have remained unbelievably quiet but are as keen as Gwilym to prevent something unnecessary as this. It's barely 3 am in the morning for the love of God and you're all in a hospital room. Sleeping patients could bang their fists on the walls from the other side any time.

You, on the other hand, have already made four steps towards the door, ready to leave the room to be alone with your thoughts for the night but you're unable to twist the knob as Rosy snaps once more with the hint, distressing with a clenched jaw.

She's unrelenting.

"Please Y/N, you're overstepping and frankly it's getting in the way of my relationship with Ben."

"You have no idea what I'm trying to do," You mumble in the most bitter of intonations for Rosy to get the message, your fingers clenching around the knob and producing a faint chink. "But he's my best friend. Let me be the person I've always been to him, " you whip your head at her -a stare you're certain could equal to a pelted javelin- and draw your brows together, pleading on account of choosing to be present in a crisis such as this, " he's all yours anyway."

With a strong swing of the door, you march angrily out of the room, making your way outside the building to blow off steam – the smooth rub of the polaroid between your fingers surrendering you to tears.

You give yourself exactly 48 hours to stay before heading back to England to board your flight for Spain.

10 hours

Ben's accident was a clean hit-and-run. Apparently some bystanders had snapped a shot of the license plate the moment the car slowed down and accelerated afterwards. It was then delivered to the police to be given further investigation. His parents have flown in from England to visit him and you badly wish you could greet them but some things are just too heavy to do right now. Back at the hospital, Ben's been given hourly checks and assessments, with each desired result constant. He's not responsive to any physical contact but the doctor is certain that he can perceive sound and sound only. His body is asleep but his mind isn't.

The rest will be visiting him at dusk while you're going in late with Joe.

After sending an email to the university about your 24-hour delay, you spend the entire day just waiting to go down there and be by his side. Regarding your solitude in the hotel room, Rami had Lucy stay in with him for the meantime and being initially worried about leaving you, she had asked for your permission to which you said yes to.

Sometimes in the day, you can't hold back a few tears at the flashing memory.

17 hours

Loving can hurt

Standing in front of the private room, you clutch the collar of your shirt anxiously, hearing incoherent but distinct murmurs on the other side of the door. Joe looks down at you and squeezes your hand lightly to relieve you of pressure. He knows how much this is affecting you, and though not visually shown, he's taking it hard too.

Loving can hurt sometimes

The door opens to a couple you've familiarized yourself with for so long. Ben's parents.

"Y-Y/N?" Says his mum, unable to believe that it's you standing before her. Your breath hitches as you grin sadly, being pulled into her embrace. "It's been so long."

"It has, Mrs. Jones."

Joe shakes hands with his father as he introduces himself politely. Mr. Jones greets you in with a light hug as well and you can't help but spill a few tears.

But it's the only thing that I know

They give you full access to the room

as they themselves have to leave for a while, thereby trusting their son to his closest circle. Knowing how tight you and Ben are, they give you much of their trust on this one and you'd want nothing more than to make sure he'll wake up without any further complications. They obviously know about Rosy but witnessing how long you and Ben have grown on one another, they trust you the most.

They bid you and Joe goodbye, leaving access to the room exclusive.

When it gets hard

As you begin closing the door behind Joe, he insists that you have some alone time with him. Though it may feel weird but he feels as if you need this the most with time going against you now. Touched by his thoughtfulness, you give him a quick embrace before he leaves you to it.

You know it can get hard sometimes

The sight before you hasn't changed that much.

The same monitors and the same person.

Same feeling.

However you'd rather take everything

in a different light and situation.

You fiddle with your fingers as you accumulate the strength to swallow the lump in your throat, drawing yourself to his side. The mild, incessant whirring of both the air conditioner and ventilator occupies the silent atmosphere along with the steady beeps of the heart monitor, blocking the huge gulp you've taken.

It is the only thing that makes us feel alive

Slowly taking a seat on the stool positioned beside the guard rails of the bed, you let out a quavery sigh– the byproduct of all the tearing up you've done today. You take his free hand in yours and stroke his pale knuckles with your thumb, leaning in to plant a kiss on it.

We keep this love in a photograph

"Ben? It's me. Can you hear me?"

One-sided conversations are helpful according to experts and this is the perfect opportunity to tell him everything without having to bear the flits in his expression.

But you beg to differ.

We made these memories for ourselves. Where our eyes are never closing.

You continue, allowing every crack and quiver to manifest in your voice no matter how relatively pathetic it will make you sound.

"Ben, please, you gotta wake up. You're leaving us in a hot mess here, bud. Hell, you gave your parents the scare of their lives. I know I'm starting off rough with this, but it's all cause you had to leap in like that. But then again, it was- it was not your fault. This- all of this is not your doing. I should've been more careful on that road. Would've been better if I had cut back on the melodrama, huh? Haha..."

You lick your lips and resume, owning the patters your tears have soiled on the tiled floor.

Hearts are never broken

"I'm sorry if I had to hide it all from you, " you build it up slowly, tears tenacious to leave your eyes, "it's just that I was afraid you'd soon forget me once you've married and I wouldn't be part of your life anymore. To make matters worse, I have always loved you, Ben. On every level and aspect, I still do. Sticking around to see you spend the rest of your life with someone else when that feeling is still present is just toxic. And to think you're supposed to be wedded tomorrow, "you sniffle, taking a few seconds to form your following words, "that's why it would be easier if we- if we...oh god, I'm actually much more of an actor than you are..." You want to chuckle for it, but nothing resembling a chuckle mopes out of your mouth. Just...short breaths.

Time is forever frozen-

"But I truly am happy for you. I really am. But I can't be happy myself when you've taken a huge portion of my heart and I'm just...I just want to make sure nothing will ever ruin your happiness," You close the distance between you and the bed, your hot tears dripping on his arm sling, the cloth absorbing it. You're really taking advantage of his inability to respond.

"I'm s-sorry, Ben. I don't know how long I can stay by your side like this. Literally like this. But as long as I am able, " you lower your head onto his chest, now shamelessly sobbing like you haven't broken down in centuries, squeezing his free but chilly hand like it's the only thing that'll give you warmth tonight, "I'm sorry if I'm going somewhere."

And still

Despite promising to give you a moment alone with him, Joe -having recurring, inquisitive tendencies- has acted as opposed to his promise and eavesdropped on your unrequited talk due to having to wait too long, not realizing that after hearing all your words exit in sobs, you've fallen asleep with your head on Ben's chest.

Joe glances around the hall before budging the door open, careful not to disturb you as he sees you out cold next to him. He presses his lips into a hard line and chuckles quietly, amused as he grabs an available sheet from the couch and drapes it over you. The moment he notices a tear droplet stuck in the corner of your eye, he wipes it away with his thumb, sighing profoundly.

"Rosy's gonna flip when she gets back and sees this. So, " Joe, mumbling on his own, tumbles back down onto the couch and kicks back, "I'll be here just in case."

20 hours

So you can keep me

A nurse opens the door with a tray and clipboard in hand to conduct an hourly assessment of his condition, not minding your head placement on his chest. He's still unresponsive to anything external.

I**nside the pocket of your ripped jeans **

As the test ends and the nurse closes the door on her way out, his finger twitches.

30 hours

Holding me closer til our eyes meet

Joe wakes you up softly with a bowl of soup in hand– something he bought from the cafeteria upstairs. You lift your heavy head from its recent spot and blink your bleary eyes at him, giving away a wry smile and telling him you'll eat later on.

You won't ever be alone

"By they way, this slipped from your pocket." He slips something off the table and hands it to you with a knowing look, that something being the dual polaroids you've taped together the other night. You take it from him deliberately and turn your head to Ben, before staring down at the joint pictures, nostalgia ever so sudden like a whiplash.

Wait for me to come home

35 hours

Loving can heal

Rami and Lucy have stopped by to visit and take your 'shifts' considering Rosy is still absent and you and Joe had to return to the hotel to change. The attending physician and a nurse come in to replace his breathing tube with a nasal cannula, since the assessment done hours prior has shown that he's already capable of breathing on his own.

39 hours

Loving can mend your soul

"Funny how today is supposed to be his wedding but we're getting a funeral instead. " Morbidly comments one of Ben's visitors and closest friends. Every single person in the room who has come by to visit Ben shoots a death glare at him for making that joke within a two feet radius of Ben who is sure to give him a bop on the head the minute he gets up.

41 hours

And it's the only thing that I know

Meanwhile Rosy had spent the entire day rescheduling the wedding and the once volatile reactions she's had do a 360 and is brought down to one, constant look as she bumps into you on your way to Ben's room.

42 hours

I swear it will get easier, remember that with every piece of you

You both don't say a word until you've settled down on the couch as she strays to Ben's side and wipes the glistening speckle of sweat on his cheek with her thumb, the silence coming to a close as you pry the words out of your mouth.

"Rosy, believe me. I have never harboured the thought of coming between you both. I'm only ever there for him as a friend."

And it's the only thing we take with us when we die

Giving you an impassive eye, she ignores your words entirely and turns her attention back to her fiance.

45 hours

We keep this love in a photograph

You don't leave the room with the hours progressing to the moment he's timed to wake up. A lot of people have paid him a visit, cracking jokes and talking to him notwithstanding the fact that he's utterly unresponsive. They've done all they can to lighten the mood in the room, hoping all their antics and bliss would lure Ben out of his induced insensibility. But he's nowhere near the edge.

We made these memories for ourselves

47 hours

With Rosy snuggled up against his side, Ben retains immobility and it's a sight you're not used to since he's one of the most fidgety arseholes who's ever graced your life. You know you'd be bombed by her if you do this with her close by, but you had given yourself exactly 48 hours to stay before heading back.

Where our eyes are never closing, hearts are never broken

And so you wander to the opposite side of the bed and peer at down your wristwatch for the time.

Time's forever frozen and still.

48 hours

"Ben?" You whimper close to his ear. He's not responding. You know he wouldn't wake up that quickly at the strike of the exact hour but you're impatient to say goodbye to him with his forest, green eyes on full display and wandering around your (Y/E/C) ones to bolster you up.

"Hey." You coax into his ear again, still no response. The racing beat of your heart has matched the beeps of the heart monitor. His heart beats. The similarity is sketchy but nearly symbolic. You're leaving in the morning and he's not up and lively for you to fervently crush in a parting embrace.

"Bud, please. I can't force you to wake up but I'm leaving tomorrow. You have to help me...here." At this point, though how eager you are to, you can't let some tears stream down from your eyes since the possibility of Rosy waking up to you catching sobs is feasible, but Ben's involuntary stillness is not helping you with that ordeal. Losing all hope for a night, you straighten up and collect your things from the couch, deciding to come back one last time tomorrow prior to your departure.

You quickly open the door to the attending physician who's about to step in to take physical tests but you whisk past him without taking a second look.

Easy to say you didn't have a good night sleep with all the stresses weighing down on you that night. Either you hyperventilated in your slumber or remained asleep but with tears seeping from your half-closed eyes.

You've sent Lucy a text in the early hours of the morning notifying her about your departure today. She hasn't responded yet.

"Just a 24-hour delay? Are they that heartless?" Leaning on the door frame of your hotel room with a bitten donut in his hand, Joe questions as he watches you prop your luggage against the open door. "I had to reschedule the flight thrice last month, this one being the latest. It's only reasonable," You huff as a matter of fact, fixing the scarf that has dangled loose around your neck and staring into oblivion barely a second after going tight-lipped.

Finishing his donut, Joe pokes you out of your momentary trance. "You alright?"

You shake your head.

"I don't even know if he's awake now. It's past 48 hours and what if he-"

"There's only one way to find out," appeasing your elevating worry, he grabs you by the shoulders and looks you square in the eye, silently guaranteeing you of his recovery.

Since he'll be driving you to the airport, your things are neatly stored in the confines of the backseat but of course, you have to see Ben one last time, setting aside all the excruciating anticipation.

You scurry into the entrance with Joe by your side, out of breaths by the time you arrive at the door of Ben's room. Taking precautionary measures, you knock firmly on the surface expecting someone or Rosy to answer. But nada. You swap some looks with Joe and twist the knob gently, finding the room free of visitors and medical staff. Perhaps they've assessed him an hour prior.

"No one's around."

As you begin slipping a foot through the ajar door, Joe puts a hand on your shoulder, stopping you mid-step.

"Lucy's on her way."

His update on her reply makes you smile and you continue into the room, seeing the curtains that had blocked the sunlight for two days cast aside, spilling some sunlight into the room.

You take small, wobbly steps along the floor, unable to accept that until now he hasn't fluttered open those orbs you loved staring into so much. You suddenly fear that a complication has risen and is causing his extended unconsciousness but that must be the least of your worries.

So you can keep me, inside the pocket of your ripped jeans

He has to hear you. He has to. He has to.

He's gone really pasty. Dark circles under his eyes despite being asleep for two days. He has grown a scruff and looks painfully unruly, but still a face of an angel. You crouch and take his free hand in yours– careful not to disconnect the IV tube from his wrist, caressing it and drawing in a sharp inhale to free yourself of any doubt to speak up. "Ben. It's Y/N. You're scaring us, you know. The doctor said you'd wake up earlier but why? Why haven't you? What are you doing in there?"

This being the end of the long haul for you, you're not forcing anything at bay anymore– not your tears, not your peeves and certainly not your feelings. You interlace your fingers around his and kiss the back of his hand, your cheeks growing scarlet and wet with tears.

Holding me closer til our eyes meet, you won't ever be alone.

You get up from crouching and throw your arm around him in defiance of the possibility of applying a lot of pressure on his chest. It feels so different holding him that way. For the time you have left, an overly emotional, one-sided conversation should make up for the lost times that would've been great for those.

And if you hurt me, that's okay baby only words bleed

"You really kept that Homecoming picture, didn't you? Coincidentally I did too, just forgot it was there as well. But I pieced it back, by the way. Ironic that we both made a promise on those polaroids the night before graduation. I-I have it with me here, just so you know. Just thought I'd bring it out since...I'll be going soon." You pull the pictures out from the pocket of your coat with trembling hands, eager to wave them in front of him. Once out, you place it on the bedside table for him to keep once more but with your share of the picture.

Inside these pages you just hold me, and I won't ever let you go

You lay your forehead on his, your tears dripping onto his closed lids as you sob his name to get him to wake, at the same time feeling his soft exhales brush against your chin. " I told you I'd be strong and I'm trying to be. I know it sounds like a selfish thing to do but you have to trust me on this one. I want to move on, Ben. You're bound to be wedded soon and have a family of your own. I want to be there for that. I want to be that aunt who'll spoil your kids and make them fight you for the craziest demands. Those things I'd gladly do...if I wasn't this hopeless for you," Little by little, your voice comes out as broken whisper– losing your strength to add any more things to say in the process. On the other side of the door, Joe is finally joined by Lucy who has arrived not a minute late and they can't help but tear up a little at how uncontrolled your crying is slowly turning out, it's become audible enough to be heard from outside.

"Ben, buddy. Come on." He huffs against the hardwood as he and Lucy are tempted to barge in.

Burying your face into the exposed column of his neck with your arm slackening from being draped across his chest, you utter a voiceless but heartfelt statement.

Wait for me to come home

"I love you, Benjamin Jones. Be happy for me."

Your words hang thinly in the fragile air as you pull away from that proximity and leave a long kiss on his forehead, walking back sadly to the door with your hand outstretched ready to grab ahold of the knob.

"H-how could I be..."

The words released sound like a mere memory resonating in your head but you are proved wrong once you turn around.

#borhap #queen #ben hardy #ben hardy imagine #ben hardy x reader #borhap cast #borhap cast x reader #borhap imagine #ben hardy fanfic #imagine #fanfic

123 notes · View notes

avengerofyourheart · 6 years

Text

Flour Girl {8} (Bucky x reader AU)

Characters: reader, Bucky (Jimmy), Wanda.

Summary: Discovering the cute guy you just flirted with is the heir of a rival bakery, you suddenly find yourself running into him all over the city. Can your small boutique bakery compete? And how do you deal with the guy who seems determined to make your life a living hell? Luckily you’re distracted by a secret admirer…But who is he? (Inspired by “You’ve Got Mail”, Enemies to Lovers)

Warnings: none! Mild swearing?

Word Count: 2.9k

A/N: *incoherent screaming* I’m really looking forward to your thoughts on this part!! :D Any and all feedback is appreciated!! I love you guys.

<<Part 7 Part 8 Part 9>>

Flour Girl Series Masterlist

Full Masterlist

_________________________________________________________

“No,” you muttered to yourself in disbelief. “No, no, no, no!”

Having reached the bottom step of the staircase leading to the cellar, you stared at the empty spot on the shelf with despair. Your legs seemed to collapse on their own as you took a seat directly on the step.

You were out of flour.

Dropping your head in your hands, you thought it over and remembered the broken bag of flour that you had neglected to replace when Sam offered the previous week. You would receive several 50 pound bags the day after tomorrow, but that did you no good in your moment of desperation. Business had been going well, thankfully, but that also meant you had been making larger batches of items that required more flour. With that, on top of your savory pastry experiments, you must have used up most of your last bag without realizing.

You were 2 pounds short on the recipe you were currently making and there was still so much left to bake until the flour arrived. If you had to wait, it would be disastrous. Allowing yourself to wallow at the decisions of your past self, you leaned your head against the wall a few minutes before climbing back up the stairs and formulating a plan.

_______

The morning had started off so well and it had the makings of a spectacular day. After agreeing to meet B in person, much to your jittery nerves, you set up plans for coffee the following afternoon. He left all planning up to you, so you thought it over before replying.

It had to be somewhere public and during the day, for safety reasons. You wanted to trust this man you had begun to fall for, but that Stranger Danger sense of self-preservation still lingered. Your dad would be proud. Finally you settled on somewhere familiar and comfortable that was also close enough to the bakery, should Wanda desperately need you. You pecked out a reply and nervously hit send.

FG: How about 4pm tomorrow? There’s a great cafe called the Hawk’s Nest. Do you know it?

B: I know it very well, actually. Wouldn’t it be crazy if we had passed each other there without even realizing? 4pm sounds perfect!

Reading his reply, butterflies gathered in your stomach. You hadn’t thought about that. What if you had seen B in person before without knowing that it was him? Part of you thought you might instinctively know him, but with no idea what he looked like, it was highly improbable. You had been to the Nest hundreds of times since moving into the neighborhood. If he was a frequent visitor…could he possibly live nearby?

Your mind was jumping to conclusions again, so you blinked a few times to clear your thoughts and focused on the screen in front of you.

FG: I’ll be there. :)

Three dots appeared as you awaited his response.

B: Wait! How will we know each other?

Thinking for a moment, you came up with a solution and smiled. This air of mystery was still kind of fun and you surprisingly didn’t want to know what he looked like beforehand. Well, you did, but maybe it would be best to reveal your identities to each other at the same time. An idea popped into your head with a smile so you typed out your thoughts and hit send.

FG: I’ll be wearing my Beatles t-shirt. ;)

A laughing emoji popped up almost immediately.

B: Deal! And I’ll be representing the Stones. I’ll see you tomorrow, Franny. :)

You laughed at the nickname, feeling anxious that in roughly 24 hours he would know your true name. And what you looked like. Nervous energy flowed through you once again, so you locked your phone and took a deep breath. A wide smile stretched across your face and suddenly, you couldn’t hold it in any longer. Practically skipping toward the front of the bakery, you grasped Wanda’s hands in your own, causing her to drop the towel she was using to wipe down the counter but you didn’t care.

“I have a date!” you shouted with glee. “Well, I think it’s a date. Maybe. I don’t know, but he’s the sweetest and funniest and I’m so excited!” you finally paused to take a breath. Wanda looked at you in shock at first and then shared your excitement with a toothy smile.

“That’s amazing, Y/N! You have a date! With who?” Wanda asked enthusiastically.

You paused a moment at her inquiry. “Well…it’s kind of a funny story…”

______________

After your long chat with Wanda in between customers and baking more items for the pastry case, she was almost as excited for your “date” as you were. A few years ago, it would have been crazy to meet a stranger in person that you barely met, but with the internet and dating apps, it was now the new normal. Well, technically, you knew less about him than you would on a dating app, but you were cautious in your plans and felt like it was about time you two met.

That entire evening, you couldn’t stop smiling and practically danced through the cleaning and dishes while helping Wanda close the shop. Not even a call from a tenant at 10pm about a noise complaint could dampen your spirits. Luckily, the noise-makers were willing to turn down their music without any more drama. You didn’t know why the complainers couldn’t solve it themselves, but whatever. People were strange.

The next morning, you hopped out of bed at the first ring of your alarm with a smile on your face. You didn’t want to think that this guy was the sole reason for your smile, but after working almost constantly since your bakery opened, for once you had something to look forward to outside your job. It was a nice change and that spark of joy carried throughout your morning of baking and even as you made your deliveries.

Jimmy was at the counter at the Nest when you arrived and, of course, he had the closest parking spot, but even that couldn’t dull your shine.

“What’s got you grinning so early in the morning, Y/N?” he asked with a skeptical gaze.

Smirking in his direction, you just kept on smiling. “That’s none of your business, Barnes. Can’t I just have a great morning that’s worth smiling about?”

Jimmy scoffed. “I rarely find anything amusing before 9am, personally,” he said, taking a sip of his coffee.

“How sad for you,” you mocked, then accepting your signed paperwork from the cafe’s owner. “Thanks, Clint. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“See ya, Y/N,” Clint replied as you offered one more amused smile to the brunet before exiting.

Arriving back at the bakery, you dove directly into baking with enthusiasm. You were trying to get as much done as possible early in the morning so you might actually have some time to freshen up before your coffee date later. It was during your second recipe that you discovered your flour dilemma.

Upon returning from the cellar, you took a deep breath and ran through a few options in your head. You could buy small bags of flour from the grocery store, but it would be ridiculously expensive and also the chance that it would be organic were slim to nil. Not to mention the change in gluten content, which would mean you’d have to alter each of your recipes. That would be low on your list of options. Next, you went to your office and got a list of bakeries in the area that might have your brand of flour.

Six calls later, you were unsuccessful. One was gluten-free, and therefore had no wheat flour, a few were sympathetic to your cause, but were on the same delivery schedule as you and couldn’t offer their flour for fear of running out themselves. Two of the bakeries flat-out laughed at you for even suggesting they help out the competition. They better hope they never need your help in the future, you thought as you scribbled out the last bakery on your notepad with a pen.

You sat at a table out front as you had made your phone calls, since service was spotty back in your office. Wanda helped out a few customers and as they walked out the door, she came to sit across from you.

“I think you really only have one option, Y/N. I know you’re not gonna like it, but…” she pursed her lips in sympathy. You had told her your problem and apparently came to the same conclusion you had.

Groaning out loud, you finally picked up your phone and found the number you hoped you would never need to call. You hit the green button and the line began to ring.

“Barnes Bakery, how may I help you?” a female voice answered.

You let out a breath that you didn’t know you held, feeling like part of you expected Jimmy to answer. Other than deliveries, you didn’t really know his responsibilities, so it’s possible he answers the phone. Thankfully, that wasn’t the case.

“Yes, this is Y/N calling from City Sweets Bakery? Could I speak to the owner, please?”

____________

The drive out to Brooklyn wasn’t bad, actually. It wasn’t often that you made your way across the Brooklyn Bridge and it was actually nice to get out of the 5 or 6 blocks of neighborhood that you only seemed to frequent.

Pulling up to the building on the address the girl shared, you parked at the nearest corner where the retail shop was found. There was an awning that displayed the Barnes Bakery name and also a vertical neon sign attached to the side of the building that presumably lit up at night.

Stepping in the front door, a bell jangled overhead and the heavenly smell of bread overcame you. The counter was in an “L” shape along the left wall with racks full of all types of breads and rolls and bagels straight ahead, each bagged by the dozen or half dozen and ready to be purchased. What truly caught your eye was the large picture window set into the right wall that allowed spectators to watch the enormous production factory in action.

Your eyes widened as you took in the giant dough mixers and large metal tables where people in aprons and hairnets shaped huge blobs of yeast dough at an incredible speed. No matter what your feelings were toward the Barnes’, business-wise, you couldn’t help to be impressed by the efficiency and size of their bakery.

“Well, look what the cat dragged in,” a familiar voice called out from behind you, causing your shoulders to tense.

Turning around, you spotted a smirking Jimmy behind the counter wearing an apron. No hairnet for you to mock, unfortunately, but he was wearing a backwards baseball cap, which was amusing. Taking a deep breath, you had to remind yourself that they were doing you a favor, so you tried to paint on a pleasant smile as you approached the counter.

“Hello, Jimmy. I spoke to your father earlier about borrowing a bag of flour?” you asked, placing your hands on the glass display case.

“Yeah, he said something about that. Our delivery guy just got here so I’ll go check with him. I’ll be right back. Don’t miss me too much,” he teased with a wink as he walked through a door into the cavernous factory. You couldn’t help but roll your eyes behind his back.

When you spoke to the owner, George Barnes, he was more than willing to help you out, much to your surprise. You half expected him to be just as cocky and prickly as his son, Jimmy. Thankfully, that wasn’t the case. Lucky for you, his bakery was on a different delivery schedule, and in fact they were expecting more flour that very day. Their facility was large enough that they could store a surplus of flour and it was likely they never ran out, which made you envious. They also happened to carry the same organic wheat flour you used and Mr. Barnes was perfectly pleasant about the whole thing. It almost made you wonder how he could be related to Jimmy, who seemed to make it his mission in life to be a thorn in your side.

You heard voices getting louder as two men rounded the corner and to your surprise, you knew them both.

“…borrow a bag, so if you’ll just take that out to her car, that’d be great, man,” Jimmy finished as the second man wheeled a bag of flour on a hand cart with two wheels, often used for moving boxes and other large items.

“Sam?” you called out in shock.

“Y/N, hey!” your regular delivery driver said with a smile. “I guess this is for you, then? For that broken bag last week, shit, I’m sorry about that.”

You waved his apology away, know it wasn’t his fault. “It’s okay, I worked it out, thanks to the Barnes’,” you smiled with your eyes flickering to Jimmy’s.

“Well, I’m glad for that. Which is your car?”

“It’s right out front, here, I’ll pop the trunk,” you said as you hit a button on your keychain.

“Alright, I’ll be back,” Sam said, giving a two-finger salute.

Turning back toward Jimmy, there was a beat of silence before you spoke up. “So…do I need to sign something, or….”

“Oh, right! Yeah,” Bucky suddenly remembered as he slid the paper over to you.

Scrawling quickly on the paper, you gathered your keys and prepared to leave.

“Full signature, please,” Jimmy requested with a smirk as he looked down at your scribbled signature. “What does that even say? Doesn’t look like your initials…” he trailed off with a furrowed brow, squinting at the paper.

Accepting the paper and pen again, you answered while you signed. “It’s not. It actually says “FG”, but it’s a habit signing that way,” you sighed, sliding it across the counter one last time.

“What did you say?” Jimmy asked in a quiet voice, which brought your gaze up to his. He seemed to be confused at that, so you went on to explain the initials quickly.

You huffed out a mildly annoyed sigh. “It’s a nickname. My dad calls me Flour Girl cause when I was younger, he would come home from work to see me covered head to toe in flour from baking. It’s silly, but I like having the connection to him while I’m far from home. Happy?” you uttered in a short tone.

Jimmy continued to stare down at the paper as if his gaze might burn a hole through it. “Um…can you…stay? For a moment? I just need to…check on something,” he stammered, seeming to have lost his usual boastful nature for the moment.

Glancing at your watch, you bit your lip in impatience, but nodded anyway. “Okay, fine.”

Jimmy disappeared around the corner then, so you leaned your elbows on the counter and watched the team of employees making bread through the window. It wasn’t that weird to have a nickname like that, right? You loved having that reminder of your dad and had even gotten used to signing the initials at work, too, like labeling containers in the fridge along with the date and what was inside. Labeling was extra important to avoid spoilage and it was also required for when the Sanitation Inspector came around. Any infractions reflected poorly on your business.

You also made the initials your text signature because on the rare occasion that your dad texted, he loved to see that reminder pop up. That you were still his little Flour Girl, no matter what.

Lost in your thoughts, your phone chirped and you fished it out to see a text on your screen. Unlocking the device, a message from B brought a huge smile to your face.

B: Franny!! I’m withholding all my coffee consumption today until I can share it with you. :)

Chuckling at the message, you typed out a reply and hit send.

FG: Well, that’s a high price to pay, but I appreciate it. I’ll see you soon. :)

As soon as the message sent, you pocketed your phone and saw Jimmy return out of the corner of your eye. He seemed to be…not like himself. He still carried the signed paper and had one hand in his pocket as he reached you.

Quirking an eyebrow, you finally addressed his behavior. “What’s wrong with you? No witty remarks today?”

Jimmy blinked at that and shook his head quickly. “Um…nope. Guess I left my wit in my other pants,” he muttered, gaze still on the paper.

You let out a snort, to your surprise and he finally looked up. “Yeah, well…am I good to go? Plenty more work to be done,” you said in anticipation.

“Yeah, sorry. All good,” he nodded with a faltering smile.

“Okay. Tell your dad thanks again,” you told him, shouldering your bag. “I’ll see you around, Barnes.”

Sam had reached the outside of the door as you approached, so he opened it for you. “You’re all set, Y/N. Guess I’ll see you in a few days?”

“Thanks, Sam. Yup, I’ll see you later,” you replied with a wave as you reached your car.

The drive back into the city took a little longer than you hoped, but you felt that nervous excitement fill you again while entering the bakery. Opening the new bag of flour, you channeled your giddy nervousness into productive energy as you watched the clock until your date.

_________________

Part 9>>

__________________________________________________________

Hoooooly crap, you guys!!! Go ahead, scream at me. I’ve been expecting it. ;) I know, we’re not quite to the meeting but SO MUCH STUFF IS HAPPENING!!!! Did you pick up on the clues?? We got to see Sam for a few minutes! And a visit to Brooklyn, what was that about?? heh. Some of you suspected that missing bag of flour would come back to bite her and here we are....oops. Sweet Wanda is so excited for her! And just keep in mind, we’re only halfway through this series. ;) I adore you all!! Any and all feedback is appreciated!! Thank you. <3

Permanent Tag list and FG tag lists are CLOSED!!

Permanent Tags:

@pietrotheavenger @thisismysecrethappyplace @part-time-patronus @feelmyroarrrr @ria132love @interestedbystanderwrites @abovethesmokestacks @hymnofthevalkyrie @spideypnw @badassbaker @janeyboo @palaiasaurus64 @dustycelt @mylittlefandomfanfictions @officialcaptain-marvel @maryehudson @sebbytrash @bionic-buckyb @sebastianbarnesandchrisrogers @jaybird6232 @bemystucky @averyrogers83 @beccaanne814 @eyesofgoldenambers @missmotherhen @bunnieandcrow @mizzzpink @buckysberrie @imaginingbucky @deathbyarabbit @avengersandchill @timeladylaurel @indominusregina @queen-merc @vaisabu @1800-peggys-orange-lipstick @piensa-bonito @msshadowboxer @coffeeismylife28 @withahintofpestoaioli @cant-decide-at-this-moment @jaderbugz @blue1928 @jbarnes87 @whothehellisbella @captainrogerss @sebseyesandbuckysthighs @themcuhasruinedme @ilovebeingjoyful @maririn @hello-sweetie-get-the-salt @girlwith100names @writingruna @lokiandbuckyaremine @hufflepuff-ish @pixierox101 @supernatural-girl97 @stay-wokke @airixaram @buckyssxxhair @buckys-newarm @lostinspace33 @poealsobucky @buckyofthemyscira @joannie95 @4theluvofall @im-a-light-child @1999yanira @escapetheshackles @lbouvet @black-eyed-bucky @finhabastos

FG tags:

@yallneedtrek @lexie-mo @flowercrownsandmetallicarms @kingcarterprince @snuggleducky @acunningstargazer @zadyalyss @satans-knitting-club @honey-bee-holly @just-add-butter @captainradicalpassion @chook007 @peekingsunshine @odinhson @chrisevans1fan @fangirlwithasweettooth @angryteapot @srhls @jurassicbarnes @livingoffsavvyillusions @ahufflepuffbitch @sebbystanlover-vk @thisismyfriend-tree @susmita121 @fandom-addict-aesthetics @lowkeybuckyb @jitterbuck @lunarcajun @aligatorinavest @isnt-the-blog-youre-looking-for @lilyblack78910 @uservalkyrie @hawaiiantozier

#bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes fic #bucky fluff #reader x bucky #bakery au #bakery fic #bucky au #avengers au #avengers fan fic #marvel fan fic #reader x bucky barnes #reader x james buchanan barnes #bucky imagine #baking #bakery #you've got mail

683 notes · View notes

borrowedbackpack · 5 years

Text

Nepalin��

Namaste from Kathmandu, Nepal, and welcome back to Borrowed Backpack. We are Borrowed Back-Back, if you will. Ha. Ha. Ha.

So anyways, yup I decided to go to Nepal. I don’t really know why, since I don’t care about mountains or anything. But so far it seems nice. Also I’m probably as surprised to be here as you, my loyal followers, are surprised that I’m here. See, after my last trip, I was heckin broke. So I then I made some money. But then I went to uni and spent all my money. Just as I was resigning myself to a year of no international travel (how tragic), a generous old lady decided to give me a bunch of money for writing a couple paragraphs about how much I love managing natural resources. I think this money was intended to help finance my continued education in managing natural things, so of course I came to Nepal to do some experiential learning about mountains, yaks, stray doggos, sub-par water quality, and carbs. Lots and lots of carbs.

We arrived last night (yup, we – Borrowed Backpack found a travel companion) at late o’clock after the longest combination of flights of my life (but a limited amount of those signature Borrowed Backpack 19 hour layovers, so that was nice). Ya’ll probably don’t care about my flight itinerary, but I’m going to discuss it anyways because it’s my blog and I think it’s interesting:

· August 17th, 4:45am: Christopher’s mother drives us to YXE. I told her we could take an Uber, because 4:45 is a very early o’clock, but she insisted on driving us so she could say “one last goodbye” (she thinks we’re going to die on Everest. I’m not sure if she knows that we’re not actually climbing Everest. But that’s okay).

· 6:30am – YXE – YVR. Not much to say. I watched a documentary about Fyre Festival. It was good.

· 7:33 am (YVR time) – we arrive at YVR and eat French toast. I buy 6L of hand sanitizer.

· 10:30am: this is where shit gets real. We embark on a 13 hr and 20 minute Hell Flight* to Hong Kong. Christopher sleeps for 8/13 hrs. Anna sleeps for 15 minutes/13 hrs. I watched all of season 10 of Modern Family, Crazy Rich Asians (to get pumped for Hong Kong), Bohemian Rhapsody, and something about the making of Back to Black. Also I listened to a podcast about Not Complaining. Which I think helped.

· ***this was not actually a hell flight. It would have been a Hell Flight on any other airline. I will exclusively be flying Cathay Pacific from here on. Around hour 7 I started to feel some moderate despair, mostly because my entire body was sore from canoeing a bunch of 8-10 year olds around all day the previous day (weird flex, I know). It was at this point that I realized that the free alcohol on the flight was, in fact, free, and not a Trick. This was a turning point – I went from “I am never flying again. If we ever reach Hong Kong, I will stay there and start a new life as a ground-dweller. I do not care” to “oh heck yes. I love being an adult. I am a Fancy Adult Traveller. Nothing hurts anymore and I roam the skies as I please.” And then they brought out gelato! What a time.

My sweet canoeing look. Oddly, a large part of my summer job was “canoeing instructor”. Which is terrifying, considering a came in with about 45 minutes of canoeing experience. Anyways, last week I was finally able to rescue a blowing away canoe full of children without assistance so hooray for personal growth.

· August 18th, 2ish pm HK time: we finally land in Hong Kong. Flying into Hong Kong is very beautiful. Everything is lush and green. There are a lot of boats. Also I saw the beautiful rainbow sustainable social housing project. No one else on the plane cared L

· Slightly after 2ish pm: HK customs. A wonderful time! I was greeted by the customs agent with a cheerful “Hey lady!” then when I handed over my passport he looked at it and said “almost it is your birthday! Have a very happy birthday!” AND THAT WAS IT. No questions. 10/10. Then we were free to roam the HK airport. Initially, I was very nervous about flying through HK due to the protest action earlier in the week. Fortunately, there was absolutely no sign of any sort of Situation by the time we arrived. We were greeted with many moon cake samples and more people toting around designer leather goods than I have ever seen in my entire life. Also a sign that just said “octopus”? idk. I was very sleepy and mildly grumpy at this point. Next we decided to look for food. As a person who does not eat meat, this proved to be extremely challenging. We walked 5,474 steps back and forth through the international terminal trying in vain to find something that didn’t have any belly, neck, or knuckles in it. Finally, we found vegetable miso ramen! Hooray! The quest was over. Except not. When I attempted to order this dish, the girl at the counter was like “okay, it has meat though. Is that okay?” and I was like actually not really but thanks. So then we walked and walked more and found the best noodles and seaweed ever and I was a Happy Traveller again. Then I slept on a bench for an hour because I felt the need to return to my Airport Hobo Roots.

My noodles! My seaweed! My weird (delicious) fried peanut cabbage stuff!

· 7:00pm – our flight (mostly empty) attempts to embark for Kathmandu. Unfortunately, it was extremely rainy by then so we had to wait on the tarmac for an hour-ish. I slept for most of this and also for most of the 4ish hour flight.

· 10pm (KTM time) – arrival in Nepal. I’ve heard a lot of horror stories about the Kathmandu airport, the visa process, and the general immigration system there so I was prepared for the worst. Luckily, I found this whole thing to be extremely quick and easy. My backpack (the NBF) came zooming off the carousel very quickly. Christopher’s took a long time so I left him to deal with that and stood off to the side to eat some spicy nuts I picked up from first class during the de-planing process because I am nothing if not a resourceful gal.

· late o’clock, idk: we took a taxi to our hostel and a very nice person showed us to our room. I tried to pay him and he was like “oh no. You’re very tired. You can just pay when you feel like it.”

This morning we woke up after a restful sleep on the World’s Hardest Bed. I had a shower, which was a big step for me because I fear the water here like I fear being struck by lightning, being involved in a shipwreck, and geology 105. So far I am fine. Then we went for a long walk, during which we went to some temples, saw a picture of a guy’s baby, almost got suckered in to buying some art (it was very beautiful art, to be fair), unsuccessfully looked for a bank, got #blessed, met a lot of dogs, almost got hit by cars/motorbikes/rickshaws x infinity, got pretty lost, saw a lot of plant life, and ate some delicious (and cheap) food (this country is the light at the end of the non-vegetarian friendly tunnel that was the HK airport).

Overall First Impressions:

· so hot. So humid. Not raining all day err day as advertised.

· A little bit…filthy. But like I understand it’s a developing country and they just don’t have the infrastructure to deal with pollution/garbage, etc at the moment so that’s okay. If anyone knows of any reputable environmental/clean up Nepal type of charities please hit me up.

· A lot less dusty than advertised. So that has been nice.

· No tourists. Or at least no noticeable tourists. Our hostel is mostly empty at the moment, presumably due to the current monsoon season situation

· Very beautiful! Very culturally rich and diverse! Very lovely people! And so many doggos!!

We at Borrowed Backpack love a good roof view.

#nepal #travel

1 note · View note