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wandasaura · 1 month

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GOLD THATS IN YOUR EYES

summary — you’ve known natasha romanoff since she first defected to shield, but it’s taken you years to realize that you’ve loved her since then too

warning(s) — fluff, mentions of the ohio mission, hurt/comfort

prompt — finding excuses to be alone with each other x noticing their individual quirks

song — mood ring by kira kosarin

🌞⊹ ˚ . 18+, men/minors dni ⁺ 𓈒 ꒰🧺꒱ 🌷 ･ mommy maximoff ✧

Natasha Romanoff was not a very sociable person, in fact, she was quite the opposite. Most people would be surprised to learn that the infamous ex assassin was admittedly somewhat of an introverted homebody, preferring the chosen silence of isolation over bustling crowds where judgment ran wild. For a woman with such a bold way about her, she was admittedly rather soft. She was soft in the way she moved around the kitchen when nobody was around to watch her frolic through cabinets on the balls of her feet, arches deep and perfect, and heels exquisitely raised above the floorboards. She was soft in the way she spoke, too. Her words were always calculated, always direct, and blunt enough to be chalked up to dry humor, but if you listened closely, if you closed your eyes and let the weight of her spoken sentence weigh on your heart in the way she’d never intended for anybody to actually do, you’d notice the soft hitch to her tone that was endearingly Russian, and the way her nose twitched whenever she wasn’t sure how a comment would be received by the masses. Natasha Romanoff was a lot of things, but an arrogant agent was not one of them; not that she’d ever admit that.

You supposed that she felt a crippling need to assert herself as if she were in a position of calculated authority. Some could say that she was in a stance of power, having been deemed not only a level six agent but also an Avenger by time she was twenty-nine, yet even with the moniker of being the only reformed Black Widow to escape Dreykov’s grasp, Natasha was never the authoritarian she prided herself on being when others were around. Granted, you were never one to challenge the way she raised her chin when she was at the center of a room full of men, and you were never one to comment on how her shoulders squared defensively whenever someone took a step to close for comfort. She radiated confidence and certainty, but beneath all of the hurt that she had turned into defensiveness, she was merely a woman that had been wronged and burned by every bridge she’d ever dared to build. You saw her as such, she knew that you did, so maybe that was why she never tried to act that way with you. It was an unspoken mutual understanding that all bets were off when fate brought you two together.

Natasha Romanoff played a lot of games. She liked the challenge of breaking down her opponent before they had the chance to break her down themselves, but the second anyone got too close she pulled a mask over her features and her bleeding heart became a loaded gun. You’d never met someone so guarded in your life, and yet she placed all cards face up on the table whenever she got you alone. Natasha Romanoff was not the sick and twisted woman she allowed the general public to believe she was. She woke up screaming from nightmares bi-weekly, the rasp in her gravely tone not natural but consequential. She closed her eyes whenever she washed her hands in fear of the clear water becoming red with the blood of her innocent victims. She stepped only on the tiles that she knew were silent, scared to make ripples in the water and alert attention. People who didn’t know Natasha Romanoff would say she was something similar to the atrocities that occurred beneath the midnight sky, but you would say she was the shadow of sweet flowers that disappeared after sunset.

You noticed every miniscule detail there was to know about Natasha Romanoff, but you know that she noticed every detail about you as well. She noticed the way you avoid going out in the rain when it’s cold, and how none of your socks ever seem to match even on missions. She noticed how you migrate down to the kitchen in the ungodly hours of the morning just to bake pastries for the team to eat at breakfast, usually cinnamon rolls or blueberry muffins with a crumb coating that Wanda particularly is a fan of, but eventually, she’d unraveled that your little habit wasn’t merely because you wanted to be hospitable toward the people you fought alongside with when extraterrestrial disasters fell to earth, but rather because your mind needed something to focus on when the nightmares of human travesties became too paralyzing and suffocating to handle alone in the dark. The first time her attention to detail became apart was a gloomy day in November, the leaves not all fallen from trees but the air frigid enough to belong in a barren January day. At that point, you’d fallen into a routine of going out for a run through central park each morning, always returning with not only a coffee for yourself, but one for her as well, but with the downpour of raindrops the size of nickels, you’d chosen the lower level gym as your route that day. Natasha wasn’t much a fan of the rain, but she never minded freezing temperatures. She found you in the debriefing room that early afternoon, her hair sodden and crimped from pallets of rain that fell overhead, but in her hands were two cuts of still steaming coffee from your favorite little cafe. She’d tried to say that she was just in the area, but you knew that she had gone out of her way to assure that at least part of your morning remained unchanged throughout the storm.

Your relationship with Natasha had been an unspoken arrangement for as many months and years as you could remember, but recently things had changed. You’d always found yourself alone in a room, two friends existing within the same space naturally, but lately even that hadn’t felt so innocently charged, and you were as much at fault as Natasha was. The Russian lingered in the kitchen just to watch as you mixed together batter for muffins that Tony would eat half of, but you hung around in the lower level gym just to hand off a water bottle when she completed her workout. Any excuse either of you could grasp onto just to spend a few uninterrupted minutes together had been abused and properly overused, but there was no admission of feelings anywhere close to the tip of your tongue.

There were some days that passed, even now years later, where when you looked at her beneath the kitchen lights, or against the punching bags, you only ever saw the broken woman that Clint had brought in from the KGB. She’d been merely a shell of herself at that time, fiery red hair matted with knots and the blood of her targets, face smeared with dirt and gunpowder. You hadn’t been on base when she’d been dragged in wearing heavy metal shackles and dehumanizing cuffs, but Maria had filled you in on everything prevalent regarding Fury’s newest asset. It had taken you three weeks to run into her when you returned, traumatized from the loss of your team and spiraling into shallow thoughts of death and finality, but from the very first moment you’d never seen her as a threat, and she’d never seen you as the lucky survivor that walked away from a raid. Her eyes were soft, softer than the wings of a newly hatched butterfly, and when she stood beneath the sunlight on the deck of the helicarrier, accent thick and sweet like the spring breeze that carried pollen beneath its current, you’d seen the daintiest twinge of gold within the green of her eyes. Maybe it was at that moment that you’d known you wanted to spend your entire life at her side, or maybe that had come much later, but what you’d definitely realized in that first month of knowing her, was that she wasn’t as complete as she wanted everyone to assume she was. There was so much despair and longing beneath her mask of confidence and casualty, so many agonizing emotions that she’d never fully overcome. There were times where you wondered what could be missing from her life that even now, deemed a hero and residing amongst people that just wanted to do good by the world, but you always circled back to the heavy acknowledgement that aside from you and Clint, nobody truly knew Natasha Romanoff. She’d spent her entire life beneath the thumb of power hungry generals, and when she’d gotten a taste of freedom and self identification, she’d conformed to be the woman that everyone else wanted her to be.

Some days however, you saw someone entirely different beneath her eyes that still held specks of gold when the sun fell upon her the right way. You saw a woman that was confident albeit flawed, painfully witty although reserved enough to hide within the walls when she didn’t want to be seen fully. But sometimes when you looked at her, you saw a woman yearning to love in the fullest sense of the word, and that broke your heart the most. She had never been shown unconditional love, never been held softly yet tightly, never been allowed to love back. Natasha Romanoff had been taught that love was the greatest weakness any woman could surrender herself to, and yet she was finally at a point where she wanted to experience the tragedy of loving something temporary. Death was unavoidable, she’d learned that young, but love transpired through isolation even if it never felt entirely complete again. For the first time since you’d met Natasha, she wasn’t scared to submit herself to the experience of loving someone to a fault, even though it meant she could very well lose it all tomorrow. Even if it didn’t seem like it to others, you noticed the subtle ways that she made progress as the years progressed, and each time you looked at her and saw a willingness to explore emotions rather than suppress them, you wanted nothing more than to squeeze her tight and be the one to teach her how to love.

“Hi.” Your voice was soft, delicate as it filled the otherwise silent kitchen. You’d heard her sneak up behind you minutes ago, but only now did it feel like the right time to greet her. She was close, but too far, pressed against the island in the middle of the kitchen whilst you stood beside the sink, hands full of strawberries that Tony had asked you to turn into something delicious. You’d rolled your eyes at the billionaire who had made a habit of soliciting you for pastries, but here you found yourself in the kitchen anyways, trading hours of sleep for muffins that would be gone by the early afternoon. “Wanna help me?” You laid the freshly washed strawberries on a clean kitchen rag, falling into the process of patting them dry without much thought or intention. All of this came so naturally now; she came so naturally now.

“I, um, I could actually just go for a hug. If it’s not too much trouble for the busy, Chef.” Her voice was hoarse, scratchy and thick as it fell onto your ears. Without the running tap, you could hear the quiet hitch in her breathing, wheezing exhales falling out into the space between your warm and yearning bodies. Your eyebrows furrowed, hands abandoning the strawberries in an instance. In all the years that you had known Natasha Romanoff, in all the years that you had seen her in the aftermath of a nightmare, she had never asked for a hug. You could count on one hand the amount of times you’d ever hugged her, and they’d all been for your own selfish reasons. You spun around to face her, palms dragging across your pajama bottoms and riding the water that clung to your palms so you could embrace her fully.

You hadn’t spared her a single glance when she’d first entered, wanting to give her the chance and time to make herself known by her own judgment and comfortability, but now that your eyes traced the delicate shadows across her face, you could make out the unbridled tears brimming in her eyes. She was ghastly pale, a fitful sleep indicative by the deep bruising beneath her eyes. You’d never seen her so distressed, but for a single second you thought about how she’d chosen to seek you out instead of trailing down to the gym and bullying a punching bag like she’d gotten into the routine of doing.

“Can I touch you?” You asked carefully, not wanting to make any sudden movements and spook her back into her shell of isolation. This was progress, and selfishly you wanted any excuse to pull her in close and hold her tight. When she nodded, a weak and fragile incline of her head, you closed the gap between your bodies and melted into her chest. She held you protectively, like she’d needed to feel you to ensure that you were safe and real. A single hand reached up to cradle the back of your head, and her lips found a home on the crown of your head as she inhaled your scent deeply. “You know you can always ask for hugs. Not just because you had a nightmare, but whenever. I mean that.”

Natasha cleared her throat, though she simultaneously tightened her grip around your waist as if whatever she wanted to say would be enough to make you either run away or disappear entirely. You didn’t comment on it, letting her have the time she needed to get her thoughts in order. You grabbed onto her sleep shirt, tight fists bunching up the material and holding it possessively. Natasha felt the motions, felt the way the cotton shirt hugged her belly tighter now that most of the slack was taken up by your grip, and you smiled softly against her chest when you felt her breath out evenly. “Today’s the day we left Ohio.” She started, and immediately your head shot up to search her blue eyes. You’d heard little about Ohio, even littler about the little blonde haired sidekick Natasha found herself protecting for three years, but you knew that what had happened had ruined her. You knew that something as little as moving away was never as simple as it sounded for her. “It was spring break. I left without being able to tell anyone I wouldn’t be coming back. They- They ripped Yelena out of my arms. I– I will always come back for you. You’re the first place that has ever felt like home outside of Ohio. I just– I needed to tell you that I’ll always come back to you.”

“I will always come back for you.” You meant every word that you said, but you could see a cloud of disbelief hanging over Natasha’s gaze as she let your eyes meet again. There was something different about ehr now, something softer and smaller than you’d ever seen. It wasn’t unpleasant, but you couldn’t bear the thought of her so distraught, you especially couldn’t bear the thought of what she had looked like at only eleven. She’d been so young and the world had been so cruel, you just wanted her to know that she was loved, and she was cherished now. She wasn’t just another soldier anymore. “Nat, can I kiss you?”

She froze for a minute, arms slackening around your waist as she stared deep into your eyes, an onset of fresh tears threatening to fall from her own, but before you could withdraw your question, before you could backtrack and excuse your vulnerability as simply being exhaustion, she was pulling you impossibly close, settling both of her hands on your cheeks as she cupped your face and settled her forehead against yours. Her touch was familiar and foreign at the same time, a coming of age to all the daydreams you’d fallen into with her at the center of them all. You’d thought about this moment for months, thought about how her calloused palms would feel against every inch of your skin, her she was always cold but not uncomfortably so. Now, beneath the kitchen lights and her greenish-gold gaze, you realized that you’ve wanted her since the very first moment you met her. “I thought you’d never ask.” Her lips, still impressionable with sadness, curled upward into a smirk, but you didn’t waste a second to kiss it away and show her the truth about love and connection.

Natasha Romanoff had kissed more people then she could keep track of, but never had any of those intimate encounters come voluntarily. For so many years her life had been a means to the mission, but she was free now. Finally, she was entirely free. In so many ways, more than you could even contemplate, you were her first, and desperately you hoped that you would each be each other's last.

#natasha romanoff #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff x avenger!reader #natasha romanoff fluff #natasha romanoff comfort #natasha romanoff fic #natasha romanoff oneshot #collection: spring fling

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vagabond-umlaut · 1 year

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⁙ six seeds, like rubies...

... and the flowers find themselves blooming in decay...

▸ trueform!sukuna x wife!reader; 0.5k wc; inspired by the hades and persephone story; warning: sukuna is sukuna, so expect the expected [mentions of blood & implied violence – not towards the reader]; spicy & fluffy; hints of reincarnation(??)

▸ this was written for the ask submitted by the amazing @heresan as part of my 100 followers celebration. ty tina!! also, i own neither the characters nor the gif nor the divider used. please don't plagiarize or translate or repost this. enjoy reading! ❤️

Ruby is the sky when Sukuna sees you, the very first time.

Strands of hair fluttering in the summer breeze and a pleased smile playing on your lips, whilst you watch your companions frolic in the meadow – you appear an oasis to his parched eyes. Elixir disguised as your frail body, the curse reckons – nay, he knows – it is fated to be drunk by him. To be devoured by him.

Ruby is the earth when Sukuna touches you, the very first time.

Velvet-soft skin cradled in one of his calloused palms while the other cards through your hair, marring them with the blood of your kin – the very same dripping down the weapons in the curse’s other two hands. Your eyes stay wide as you gaze upon the sight before – a vision certainly too ghastly for a delicate maiden as you – yet Sukuna makes no move to conceal. Instead, he tilts your chin up with a finger and inquires, mouth twisted into a sneer, “Like what you see, pet?”

Ruby is your kimono when Sukuna kisses you, the very first time.

It isn’t tender; he knows. Nor is it loving; he knows this too. Yet, despite the knowledge, the curse finds himself pressing his lips to yours with increasing force; an attempt to draw out your taste and engrave it within himself. So new, so sweet, oh so, so addicting – a satisfied hum leaves him as he parts from you and lowers you onto the bed, a dishevelled mess in lieu of the composed woman you’ve always shown to be – until tonight, your wedding night, that is.

Ruby is your wine when Sukuna vows to you, the very first time.

The chalice falls onto the ground below, rendering it a deep red – not unlike the scene he created three summers ago. Amusement makes its way onto his features, a smirk paired with a huffed chuckle, before beating a hasty retreat – you’re staring at him, stunned, staggered, breaths fast and shallow while your dainty hands reach out to cup his cheeks.

“Say that once more, my king,” You urge him in a whisper – a request Sukuna decides to deny, choosing to instead drag his sharp teeth across your pulse point – before a quiet whimper floats into the air and the curse feels his resolve weaken.

Raising his head from where it lies at the juncture of your neck and shoulder, he brushes the moisture away from your eyes and laughs. A cacophony – greedy, cruel, selfish – yet your expression might as well portray it as a soft melody to one, your husband muses.

Sukuna decides to indulge his Queen, just this one time.

“I’m never letting go of you, woman. Hate me, love me, I fucking don't care. You’re stuck with me. For good. For now. Forever.”

Ruby is the gaze you find on the other bank of the river, that fated summer evening – the forbidden hue to your screened palette.

And ruby is the gaze you find on the other side of the room, this fated summer evening – eons and eons later – the only hue you know you’ll ever need to paint your greyscale life.

▸ masterlist

▸ taglist: @afortoru, @guccirosegold, @heresan, @luckimoon, @megu-meow, @nanamikentoseyebags, @pupkashi, @ritsatoru, @softsatoru, @sweetdreamssatoru. :))

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thatsdemko · 10 months

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the story of us - m.verstappen

part two (good riddance)

Taylor swift inspired works masterlist

masterlist

requested: n

pairings: max verstappen x driver!reader

warnings: angst??? idk

a/n: HAPPY SPEAK NOW TV!!

And we're not speaking and I'm dying to know

Is it killing you like it's killing me yeah

I don't know what to say since the twist of fate

When it all broke down and the story of us

Looks a lot like a tragedy now

the crash. it was a simple overtake, one Christian warned him about. you were on your way to p1, your first pole position in formula 1 and max verstappen—your boyfriend and teammate— just so happened to have the nerve to take it away from you and leave you into the barriers.

“what the fuck is your problem?!” you wip your helmet and balaclava off in an instant. the second the Marshalls take him and you back to the garage you’re fighting. this is why Christian warned you two of mixing your pens in the company ink.

“my problem?!” he whips around at the sound of your voice crashing into his ears. he hates when you yell.

“you saw me coming! christian told you!”

max starts to rebuttal, but Christian puts his hand up to stop him. max knows Christian and you are right. he was warned you had DRS and were flying right into pole position— his position.

“leave her alone.”

“you don’t tell me what to do with my girlfriend.”

— next chapter —

it’s been two weeks since the incident. two weeks since he sent your car flying into the barriers, and you haven’t spoke since.

he hasn’t called to apology and you haven’t made any efforts to show him you’re over the fight. you just want your damn boyfriend back.

you’re situated on the end of the couch, he’s in the middle between Charles and lando, happily engaging in gossip and conversation while the interviewer starts to ask you questions. typically, max would pay attention, he’d smile and nod along like a proud significant other, but he could care less in this moment.

“have you two made amends since the attempted overtake?” the interviewer looks up from his cards in his lap. his eyes scan max, who’s busy in conversation with Charles, and then back to you. it’s quite obvious no attempt of amends have been made.

you’re nervously playing with the ends of your hair. you’re nodding along to the questions and trying to keep track of what needs to be answered, but of course he goes off on a tangent, and asks the question you didn’t want to answer. were you two going to be okay? was formula 1’s it couple going to survive this fight? the answer was quite simply, no.

“umm,” you pause for a moment and look over at the other Red Bull driver. that’s what he was to you now, you weren’t even sure if he was your boyfriend anymore.

“we’ll get there.” you fake a smile and set the microphone into your lap allowing the questions to flow to the three boys.

Oh, I'm scared to see the ending

Why are we pretending this is nothing?

—

“and that’s pole position for y/n y/l/n! her first win in formula one!”

the crowd is erupting in cheers. the radio hasn’t stopped buzzing with excitement, and while you’re excited, and happy, there’s someone who’s voice you’d want to hear on the other end. there’s someone you want desperately congratulating you.

in the winners room, he doesn’t even bat an eye in your direction. Charles is playing middle man trying to please everyone with his jokes and lighthearted humor, but it’s no use. the tension is bubbling between you two.

“congrats, by the way.” max says rather briefly. he’s looking at the television in the room that’s replaying your overtake on him. the one that didn’t fail and alter your relationship. he wonders what would be different if he didn’t push you off the track. would you be kissing right now? would you cry in each others arms?

you don’t even get the chance to say ‘thank you’ or ‘I miss you’, because by then you’re being called up for podium and the distance between you two is so very obvious. the love and happiness Red Bull used to have, was a flame that was dying.

I don't know what to say since the twist of fate cause we’re going down

and the story of us looks a lot like a tragedy now,

the end

read part two here

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fiyaa-xoxo · 3 months

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Theres something different about receiving a handwritten letter......

✧˚ · .Spring has sprung as the NCR students walk through out the NRC campus. With spring here and the flowers blooming, and most important of all valentines day right around the corner. NRC launches lockers for students to anonymously give someone something for valentines day. Surprise, Surprise the prefects locker was the one with the most letters. Lets see what some of them wrote, will u find out who wrote what?....

From: A crimson flower...

My Crimson Rose,

In this whimsical realm where time dances to its own curious tune, I find myself enchanted by the notion of Happy Unbirthdays and the delightful chaos that ensues in the shadow of the Queen of Hearts. It is within this peculiar Wonderland that our paths have crossed, and my heart, typically bound by the rigidity of rules, has succumbed to the joyful mayhem of your presence.

Oh, how the tea parties unfold in blissful disorder, each cup raised in celebration of the nonsensical day that is every day but one! The Queen of Hearts, with her regal decree and whimsical demands, presides over these gatherings where laughter echoes like the most harmonious of melodies. In the mirthful company of jesters and creatures, our souls intertwine, and the rules of reality bow to the capricious whims of Wonderland.

As the Queen commands the cards to paint the roses red, I am reminded that the essence of love in this fantastical realm is as unpredictable as the ever-changing hues of Wonderland's flora. In the intricate dance of courtly affections, I find myself waltzing with you, my partner in this splendid, topsy-turvy masquerade.

From: An Inky Dealer...

And so, my heart, once bound by the rigid laws of reason, now surrenders to the whimsy of Wonderland and the joyful rebellion that accompanies it. With every unbirthday tea party we share, I am reminded that true happiness lies not in conformity but in the enchanting chaos of love.

To my Siren,

As the currents of fate weave through the whimsical waters of Twisted Wonderland, I find myself drawn to you like a siren's call echoing in the depths of the Monstro Lounge. In this ocean of magical mayhem, your presence is a beacon that lights up the darkest corners of my heart.

The glittering allure of Ursula's domain mirrors the shimmering depths of the feelings that swirl within me. Much like the ebb and flow of the tides, our connection resonates with a rhythm that transcends the ordinary cadence of everyday life.

In the enchanting embrace of the Monstro Lounge, where secrets are exchanged like treasures and laughter dances upon the waves of conversation, I am captivated by the spell you cast upon my existence. Ursula's wisdom echoes in the whispers of our shared moments, and I am reminded that love, much like the sea, holds depths yet to be explored.

So, let this letter be a testament to the enchantment you bring into my life, a tale woven with threads of magic and mystery. In the embrace of Ursula's sanctuary and the symphony of the Monstro Lounge, my heart finds its rhythm in harmony with yours.

From: The oasis in the hot sands...

Dear, sunshine

With the boundless energy of a desert breeze, my affection for you grows, and the tapestry of our shared moments becomes a mosaic of joy and laughter. Your smile, a treasure more precious than any gem in the sands, illuminates my world with unparalleled warmth.

In the vibrant oasis of love, I find solace in the melody of our shared laughter and the dance of our dreams under the twinkling stars. With each passing day, my heart beats in rhythm with the magic you bring into my life.

So, let this be a simple testament to the love that blossoms like a desert rose within my chest—a love as boundless as the endless sands of Twisted Wonderland.

From: A loyal knight

My dearest Everglow,

Amidst the tapestry of my own existence, I pledge my loyalty to you with the same unwavering devotion that I offer to the illustrious Malleus Draconia. To serve him is an honor, and in his guidance, my loyalty becomes an intricate dance—a choreography of duty and affection.

In this realm where loyalty is both a shield and a key, my heart beats with the rhythm of a promise made not just in service but in love. Your understanding gaze, a refuge in the labyrinth of obligations, is a testament to the deep connection that transcends the boundaries of duty.

So, let this be a tender acknowledgment of the magic that binds me to both my fae heritage and the loyalty I extend to you and Malleus—a love letter written with the ink of allegiance and sealed with the embrace of my heart.

Writers note: Hello everyone! Were u able to find out who's who? Let me know if u want more writings like this!

Requests are open!! ^^

───────⋆⋅☆⋅⋆──────⋆⋅☆⋅⋆────────⋆⋅☆⋅⋆──

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adamsrcnan · 1 year

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When it comes to Rin and Kitay's legacy in the aftermath of tbg i believe Nezha will allow people to tell whatever stories they like. I think he will let the people spin their own tales, myths, rumours about what happened so everything just remains speculation, exactly how it did with the red emperor and the trifecta.

He will allow people to say what they need, and believe what they believe, in order to bring stability to the country because thats what they died for. That's what Rin asked for. He won't deny or confirm any details of what happened, of their story. He will keep the details of their twisted and doomed friendship close to his heart and bear the punishment of their story forever being tarnished by altered version of the truth.

I like to think at the end of it all Nezha will have a secret room, his own treasure trove full of things that belonged to his friends. He would keep Rin's blade made from speerly steel, he'd have a lock of Kitay's unruly hair and documents scrawled all over in his writing, maybe he'd even stumble across Venka's bow abandoned in Arlong. He'd have a bottle of sorghum wine and 4 glasses. Every time he'd go down there he'd pour a fresh drink in each one each time and have a vigil, where for that brief moment he would allow himself to grieve and mourn and drown in the resentment of what could have been. Then he'd hide it all away tightly into his chest again and carry on playing the cards he had never asked for, but had been dealt anyway.

And then when it was time, and when he inevitably returned to that grotto he would take the knife with him that material symbol that ended it all. The thing that killed his friends, the only divinity he truly believed in, and sealed his fate, and take it with him to die too. Because if he couldn't have them in this life, then no one could have what took them away from him either.

#idk idk i'm rambling #but god i feel so much #just the thought of nezha's grief and life long torment it aches in my chest #and i just want to imagine that he's allowed this one small soft gesture #bc they loved each other goddammit and i won't have anyone or anything deny it #yin nezha #fang runin #chen kitay #sring venka #rinezha #the poppy war #rf kuang #tpw

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differenteagletragedy · 3 months

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Can we pretend it's still Valentine's Day?

Because then you have Baxter, who spent so much of his life trying to convince himself that Valentine's Day is completely and utterly charming. The romance, the pinks and reds, the hearts, the cupids -- it's all so cute and the kind of thing that, in his heart of hearts, he loves, but he's not a sentimental guy, remember? He doesn't like showing that part of himself. Until he does!

He didn't have friends for so long growing up, and he never had any that went to school with him, so baby Baxter would have no one to exchange valentines with, and if he did then it would be some forced thing by a teacher. He'd watch other kids shyly give each other sweet little cards with nice little messages on them and know, even as a kid, that he'd never get to be part of something like that.

There might be a Valentine's Day dance event he could attend, and maybe he and the Boys Club jokingly give each other Batman cards or something, but the tender little sweetheart that he is, he can't help but think that it would be just so nice to get something a little more.

When he gets older, it might be easy to imagine him being bitter about the holiday, but I don't see that happening -- he's fine planning weddings for a living, I don't think he'd get catty about one day a year dedicated to love. And with how many people choose to get married on Valentine's Day, he doesn't really have an option to openly dislike it.

Instead, he does what he always does and locks away the part of himself that would love nothing more than to get a single cheesy red rose on that day. Grocery store full of flowers and boxes of candy? No it's not, he doesn't notice anything different. There are some decorations at the office of a red and pink variety? How nice, he will pay it absolutely no mind whatsoever. Heart-shaped cookies at Xake's when he stops by in February for planning purposes? Very cute, not at all representative of anything special.

BUT THEN you come back in his life. A little bit of magic, just for him, a beautiful twist of fate that swung your paths together once again. And it's hard at first, of course it is, because he doesn't do relationships but at the same time, he's so in love with you it hurts.

Months go by, summer turns into fall turns into winter, and suddenly it's February again. He'd never put any expectations on you -- even at this point, he's still a little nervous you're going to realize how broken he is and leave, and he wouldn't blame you for it -- but still, things feel a little different this year. Instead of compartmentalizing everything about this sweet little day of love, he find himself feeling a tinge of hope.

Shower him with love on Valentine's Day, please. Send him flowers at the office so everyone knows (like he would ever shut up about you in the first place) that his heart is taken. Make reservations at a nice restaurant. Wear something fancy because you know he will. For the love of god, take that man dancing. Dance with him after breakfast in the kitchen, dance with him after you do your shared skin routine before bed.

Please just never stop dancing with him.

#baxter ward #our life valentine's day

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discotenny · 5 months

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Lost you once

After your death, Akechi struggles to make the right choice.

Goro Akechi x Reader <3k words, angst, P5R spoilers, acceptance of death, Akechi cries a lot>

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It’s the first time he sees you in months and it feels just like the first time he ever met you.

You’re lost in the station, looking around in confusion as you try to decipher signs that don’t look familiar. You accidentally bump into him and Akechi has to stop himself from letting out a yell, to stop himself from unleashing the culmination of a bad day onto some unsuspecting stranger.

Besides, you were already terrified enough, having gotten off at the wrong stop with little to no money left on your train card.

You chided yourself while explaining the situation to him- rambling self deprecating thoughts about being stupid for not refilling your balance, for falling asleep on your original train ride, and for bumping into him from behind.

He thought you were pathetic at the first meeting. A bumbling idiot, sweating with every word you rambled out- he had to hold himself back from letting his inner annoyance leak into his eyes.

Something about you sparked something strange within him. You reminded him a little too much of who he once was. And maybe that’s why he helped you that day. Why he bought you a ticket to Yongen-Jaya. Why he sat next to you on the train. And why he let himself accept your thank you gift of a half finished pack of gum.

Akechi made a joke that just one piece would have been less sad than a half eaten pack and he could see your lip tremble at his words. Akechi chose to ignore the strange guilt that came with the sight.

Following that, you promised one day you’d give him a proper thank you gift the next time you saw him. Akechi didn’t really believe there would be a next meeting, but it didn’t hurt to entertain the thought.

It’s the first time he sees you in months and it feels like the first time he saved you.

In another stroke of bad luck (or maybe fate), you find yourself falling into the Metaverse as you run away from some creeps trying to rope you into a ponzi scheme.

You’re terrified, shaking at the surreal and unfamiliar setting of a twisted version of Shibuya. From the corner of your eye you see running figures of blacks and reds. Out of instinct you hide, afraid of whatever monsters this strange world possesses.

That’s where he finds you. Hiding in an alleyway from sentient ATMs and shadowy businessmen. You’re just as scared as the first time he saw you, even more so in fact.

Once again he finds you pathetic, shaking like a leaf in the wind. But the sight of someone like you alive in the metaverse is a fascinating one he can’t help but admire. Deep inside he wonders if you’re different from others, but he squishes that thought.

He would have just killed you there, had you not immediately jumped into his arms when he first spotted you. Even worse- you had somehow guessed his identity under the mask- claiming the surprised sound he made was the exact same as the one from the train station.

He had every reason to kill you then and there, end your existence as he continued his mission to run away from the thieves, and no one would be the wiser as to where a pathetic nobody like you ended up.

Yet he didn’t. And that might’ve been the worst mistake of his life.

Because maybe if he killed you he wouldn’t have gone to dinner with you after. Maybe he wouldn’t have taken you home. Maybe he wouldn’t have spoken more and more with you.

Maybe if he killed you then he wouldn’t have fallen in love with you.

Maybe he wouldn’t desire your touch through every hour of every day. Maybe he wouldn’t go to sleep drifting to dreams of you. Maybe he wouldn’t live the rest of his days craving your form.

And maybe if he killed you, he wouldn’t have lost you.

It’s the first time he sees you in months and the way you run into his arms has never felt so wrong.

The last time he held you, he knew it would be the last. He spent the day showering you in love, kissing you all over, holding you as to savor everything you had to offer. He wanted you to feel safe in his last moments with you, how you always felt when you were by his side.

Going into Shido’s palace, he had every intention of never coming back.

He expected you to be devastated. Spend days crying in your bed over his disappearance. Be upset, maybe even angry at the thought of him abandoning you for his selfish goals. He expected you would be devastated, but he also expected you would move on eventually. That maybe your anger towards him would turn to hate, that your upset would turn to disdain. That you would look upon his imprint on your life as a dark part you would never long for again.

It’s for the best, he said to himself. As always, he ignored the guilt that came with knowing he would cause you turmoil.

But Akechi never expected you to come to Ren, begging him to help him. He never expected you to force them to take you, for you to venture willingly into the dangerous world of the metaverse- just for him.

Akechi looked into your eyes through his red mask and saw a flash of bravery that was never there before. The spark made him stop in his tracks, pause in his monologue, freeze over as he realized the best of you only came when he was at his worst.

But the guilt is squashed as soon as Ren opens his mouth. And all hell breaks loose.

The battle between the thieves and himself is something he wishes you never saw. Seeing his humanity break, letting loose the feelings he tried to keep you safe from, his desperation to prove he was worth living-

He tried not to look at you throughout the struggle. If he did, he knew his resolve would fall apart and he’d do nothing more than cry in your arms.

As he stands beaten and defeated in front of you and the thieves, he still doesn’t meet your eyes. Even as you try and comfort him with words of love and assurance the ringing in his ears tunes them out. He doesn’t hear your chiding, your cries, and he certainly doesn’t hear the first “I love you” towards him that slips past your lips.

As he accepts his defeat and his own inferiority, he notices a familiar presence creep out from the shadows.

The foul words that his shadow spits out make Akechi want to claw out of his own skin. Towards the thieves, towards himself, towards you- horrible words and terrible truths fill the air. Things he tried so desperately to hide from you.

His killings, his past, his life as a living puppet for Shido to toy with as he pleases- all of it is laid out for you to hear.

He notices the pistol attached to the shadow’s waist and recognizes the glint in his empty eyes. He swallows the defiance that rises from his throat, the part of him that wants to prove the monster in front of him wrong. Through it all Akechi realizes this is where he dies.

Acceptance is what causes him to raise his own gun towards the him in front of him.

And when his gun raises, you run.

It happens in a flash.

Two gunshots.

One towards him, one towards the button to raise the wall that separates him and the thieves.

Two people move.

You push him out of the way, he falls to the ground.

One wall.

And he can’t see you anymore.

Laughter in a mockery of his own fills the side of the wall inaccessible to him, descending in tone as they slowly disappear into the floor along with the source. Your shocked gasps and painful winces follow in turn.

He screams until his throat is raw, pounding at the wall as he tries to claw his way to the other side. He promised your safety, not this.

You speak to him the best you can, over the pain in your stomach and the agony in his heart. Shakiness lines your voice as you chide him, telling him to shut up and listen to you. Through your sentences you cry. And you let out the second “I love you” directed towards him, and the first “I love you” he actually hears.

By the time he can reply with his own declaration you don’t have it in you to answer. And despite his acceptance of his own death just seconds prior, acceptance at his own survival makes him want to do nothing but scream.

The months that follow leave him hollow, an empty shell at who he once was. He watches from the sidelines as the thieves save the world. He watches from the streets as Maruki makes a mockery of Tokyo.

And Akechi watches as you cry into his scarf, scared and terrified just as he remembered you to be the first time he met you. He holds you and he knows this isn’t supposed to be. He shuts his eyes tightly, squeezing your shaking form.

Akechi brings you to Ren because he doesn’t know what else to do.

But Ren’s changed. There’s a new sense of melancholy that’s settled in his soul, different from the overwhelming grief that’s taken over Akechi’s. The first words he speaks explain everything about this ‘new’ him.

“So this is what he meant.” Monotone. Void of all the underlying confidence and ego he used to carry himself with. Filled with nothing but acceptance of something the two of you cannot comprehend. Ren urges the two of you to come inside Leblanc and sit with him at a booth.

Akechi takes the inside of the seat and you grasp his hand as you sit down. After a moment of silence you’re the one that chooses to speak first.

“Why am I here?” The crack in your voice makes Akechi want to shatter.

You look up at Ren and your eyes plead in desperation for an answer. Akechi can’t help but look away, staring at the table as he refuses to bear witness to the cruelty of your situation.

Ren sighs and twiddles his thumbs on the wood. “Maruki came by yesterday. He offered me something in exchange for allowing him to merge mementos and reality together. I-”

Akechi sees red and stands up, letting go of your hand, pointing an accusatory finger towards Ren. “So you let this happen? You allowed him to do this?!”

“I didn’t! But I woke up this morning and everything… Everyone was different. All of my- our friends are somehow in these idealized, contradictory lives. It doesn’t make any sense… And I- I don’t know how to fix this.”

“And why aren’t you the only one affected huh? He offered you something but you’re still here-”

“It’s this. He offered me this.”

The walls of the cafe seem to dissipate as you soak in the information Ren just revealed. Akechi quiets, eyes widening as his hands fall to his sides. Ren looks away, a grimace finding itself on his features.

“I just wanted you to be happy, both of you. All of us. You shouldn’t have been involved from the start y/n. I- I shouldn’t have brought you with us and I regret it every single fucking day. It was my fault, I’m sor-”

You reach over the table and place a comforting hand on his own. “Please don’t apologize.” Despite the sadness that laces your words you’re smiling.

Ren returns your smile with a solemn one. He turns to Akechi, “When you disappeared after it felt like that dream was as good as gone. I didn’t know you were even alive until today…”

“So by bringing me back Maruki thought that would…”

“Fix us…” Akechi cuts in and his hands are shaking. The anger that claws up his body is familiar. It’s visceral, and he still refuses to look at you. “That bastard…”

The two of you leave Leblanc shortly after, accepting an invitation to come back tomorrow to discuss the situation further with Ren. The streets are quiet as Akechi leads you home, holding your hand but not looking at your stare.

“Goro…” He doesn’t need to meet your eyes to know you’re looking at him in pity. “I…” Your hesitation makes his throat close. Are you scared of what he might do? Are you thinking back to the last time you saw him angry? The last time you saw him ever?

“I… don’t want you to accept this reality.”

“What?” The smile that finds itself on his face is a front for his disbelief. His eyes are closed despite turning towards you and that makes you frown.

“Look at me, Goro.”

He doesn’t want to. The last time he stared at you up close was the morning of your last. The last time he looked in your eyes was moments before your passing. The last time he looked in your eyes was the day a part of him died.

But your hand gently grasps his chin and forces him to drown. He can’t stop the tears that fall from his eyes as his eyes finally meet your own.

“Reject this, please…”

Akechi doesn’t say more because if he does it’ll be a verbal acknowledgement that you weren’t supposed to be here. He doesn’t say more because if he does he doesn’t know what’s going to happen to you.

He was supposed to be your protector, but he’s reduced to a shaking child desperate to cling onto the one source of love in his life. The more you take him into your hold the more he crumples, letting out sobs in a reply he can’t bring himself to speak. He must look pathetic, he thinks to himself.

“I-”

Your hand comes to his head, caressing his hair as he cries. Through sniffles and hiccups he allows himself to hug you back.

“I’m so, so sorry,” His voice is lined with water as he feels himself begin to grovel.

“I know,” your voice is soft yet all it serves is to intensify his turmoil.

“I don’t want to lose you again, I-”

“It’s alright.”

“Is it selfish that I want to say no?”

You pull away from him, holding him by the shoulders and looking up at him with your wonderful, shining eyes.

“It’s not selfish Goro. It’s just love.”

You kiss him, and your lips are just as soft as he remembers them to be. The same lips that would bring him out of nightmares and darkness. The same lips that would manifest a sense of love for himself that never existed without your presence. It’s innocence that lines your movements, just like the innocence that has followed you since the first day he ever met you.

When you draw back to take a breath he finds himself chasing after you in desperation. His hand comes to your chin as he tries to pull you closer to him, to try and merge your souls so yours can’t escape from his again.

There’s a sick feeling in his stomach that if your lips represent innocence, his represents the ever growing darkness seeping out from within him. With the merger of your love, Akechi doesn’t want to know if the product is something that can withstand what has to come next.

His lips supplement all the words he refuses to say. They pour apologies into your being and with every movement he hopes you understand just how much he missed you and how much he needed you.

When you part you’re panting, staring up at him in awe and wonder and it makes him want to sob.

“I…” Akechi wants to move away from your gaze, from any possible judgment he feels you may let out. Ironically, it’s the intensity of your look that keeps him chained to eye contact. “I cannot live in a world without you.”

“But you have to.”

He can’t bring himself to say that he knows but you know it’s there anyways.

“It’s going to be okay Goro.”

“How do you know that? It hasn’t been okay since… I haven’t been okay since.”

“I know because I believe in you,” your thumb rubs his cheek, red from the cold and tears. “I know you think that what happened is your fault but it was my choice Goro. You can’t take that away just so you can deny yourself the chance to live.”

The shine in your eyes is unmistakable. The same look you gave him before he never saw you again, bravery. Akechi grabs your hand because he knows what’s going to happen next.

“You can’t do this,” he chokes up, “You can’t sacrifice yourself again for me.”

You take a step back, still holding onto his cheek and looking at him with those incredible, shining eyes. “I love you, Goro.”

“I love you too. I love you, I love you, I-” He hopes if he repeats it enough it’ll convince you to stay.

“And because I love you, I can’t stand to see you this way.”

You kiss his cheek for one more time and whisper in his ear.

“Live your life Goro. Help Ren and save the world. And when we see each other again, tell me everything,” your lips leave his cheek so gently it's like you were never there.

“I will, I promise, I promise you I will,” his gaze glosses over as he takes in all of your form. Your warmth, your eyes, your kindness, your lips, your bravery, your smile, all of you. Akechi closes his eyes and there’s a silent I love you that doesn’t need to be said.

The embrace of your arms dissipates, his hand closes around nothing, and all that’s left in your wake is the glitter of sparkle and shine. It’s the last time he ever sees you in this life, but it’s nothing like the first time he lost you.

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RAHHHHHHh !!!!! I hope you guys enjoyed this !!!! I enjoyed writing this GOD I LOVE MT BAB TGEFUWHFIWEHFJQI !!!

#persona 5 x reader #persona 5 royal x reader #goro akechi #goro akechi x reader #akechi x reader #persona 5 x reader headcanons #persona 5 x reader imagines #persona 5 imagines #persona 5 headcanons #persona 5 #persona 5 royal imagines #persona 5 royal #akira kurusu #ren amamiya #persona 5 x reader angst #angst #goro akechi x reader angst

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sandbees · 10 months

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What I think the Dark Mirror would say to my different AUs of Yuu's:

Disney Fanatic! Yuu - The nature of your soul is bright, such as a shooting star. I sense no magical power within this one, but your soul is imbedded with imagination stronger than any bestown upon me. Therefore, they belong to no dorm.

Blot! Yuu - The nature of your soul is...shapless, but a dark ink has surrounded this boundless soul. You have potential, but it is blocked by the fog around your soul. There is no magic, therefore, they belong to no dorm.

Addams Family! Yuu - The nature of your soul is...a darkness that streches out beyond your body. It reaches for those that attempt to harm you. It protects you, becoming a beast that would die for you. Your soul does not fit any dorm, therefore, no dorm would be appropriate.

Gem Hybrid! Yuu - The nature of your soul is...a pink rose, healing and calming. Your soul glistens like a diamond, however the pressure upon your soul dulls the potential you have. Your magic is purer than those in this room. Therefore, no dorm shall be assigned to this one.

Harry Potter! Yuu (Griffindoor) - The nature of your soul is...brave. Red and gold, your soul screams for adventure, willing to rebel against those who oppose you. The magic within you has shaped your soul to a Griffin, one that gives a cry that has already sorted you. Since you have already been sorted, I shall not assign you a dorm.

Harry Potter! Yuu (Ravenclaw) - The nature of your soul is...wise. Blue and bronze, your soul has settled to seek knowledge, your magic shaping it to a raven. The raven caws, a knowing look in its eyes, and it already knows that once you've been sorted. Since you have already been sorted, I shall not assign you a dorm.

Harry Potter! Yuu (Slytherin) - The nature of your soul is...cunning. Green and silver, your soul plans for the future fate has handed you. Your magic within the soul is strong, twisting it to a snake. The snake hisses, defensive as you have belonged to another. Since you have already been sorted, I shall not assign you a dorm.

Harry Potter! Yuu (Hufflepuff) - The nature of your soul is...loyal. Yellow and black, your soul can feel that this year will not be like others. The magic within you shifts in this world, forming a badger. The badger huffs, welcoming, but stern that you shan't be sorted. Since you have already been sorted, I shall not assign you a dorm.

Card Collector! Yuu - The nature of your soul is...interesting. Very, very interesting. The magic you possess is akin to Unique Magic. However, your soul is unable to wield it. The shape of your soul is boundless, nothing, unless you learn to wield it in the future. Therefore, your soul is fit for all dorms once it is shaped. Otherwise, there is no dorm that fits in the present time.

#some aren't included because I think that the Dark Mirror would say the same thing as canon #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland imagine #twisted wonderland yuu #twisted wonderland headcannons #disney fanatic! yuu #blot! yuu #yuu addams #gem hybrid!yuu #might make a part 2?#who knows #harry potter! yuu #card collector!yuu

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fernandezology · 1 year

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fernardezology’s recommendation list

series:

invisible string by @invisiblestringmm

where one night fling with mason turned into something impactful. he is unaware that you have a daughter together,but fate has a plan for you. it’s one of the best pieces i’ve read here and while you read it,you cannot feel immersed with story.

just pretend by @gavisuntiedboot

this should be turned into a netflix show. while you wait for an update,you will definitely want to reread it.

worlds collide. by @blubffsd

so much drama. listen to the great war by taylor swift while reading.

juno! by @jesssssssssica

it’s gonna be impossible not to fall for jude after you read this. also very impossible not to check her other work😉

we’ll be allright by @footiehoemcfc

mason angst at it’s finest. very rereadble.

champion’s league’s nights by @yungbludz

there is no better crossover,even marvel doesn’t come close to this. my personal multiverse of madness.

sunshine becomes you by @oh-saints

never knew i needed grumpy martin x sunshine reader before i saw this.

to have and to heal by @yellowkitkieran

where martin navigates the ups and downs of parenthood all on his own, and he’s struggling. that’s not to mention football, life and... love? her other stories are also 10/10.

envolver by @pedriscroquettes

loved every single word here.

a mountain to climb by @mountttmase

you will go through every emotion with this one.

his girls by @pulisicsgirl

is there anything better than christian in general? yes and it’s dad!christian.

almost always by @greykitkepa

thank you for your service and spreading kepa propaganda by writing🫡

one shots/headcanons

can’t sleep (without you) by @julianalvarez9

leandro is the cutest sleep deprived thing and it’s safe to say she did him right with this one.

headcanons by @starsshoppin

i couldn’t choose just one,all of them are masterpieces. head of headcanons and probably one of the first accounts i followed here.

silent treatment by @masonspulisic

angst with mason by her never disappoints.

pretty face,pretty boyfriend too by @masonmtxo

jelaous mason>>

dating pablo gavi by @i9messi

exactly how i imagine dating him would be like.

the great war by @mounts89

as if this already wasn’t my fav song from midnights..

comforting words by @mqsi

if barca losing means we get masterpieces like this,we won after all.

red card by @pedrisbanana

i will never see the barca lockroom the same way.

mornings with you. by @luvgavii

prime example of “how is this her first imagine?”

mistletoe by @ktsfootballff

the twist at the end?? love love this and her work in general.

the 5 times he knew by @888bear

who doesn’t love good old childhood friends to lovers?

wherever you are by @swimmingismywholelife

so so beautiful.

headcanons by @minnlix

again,it was hard to choose just one because all of them are *chef’s kiss*

nsfw alphabet by @footballfeverr

mindblowing. that’s all i have to say.

mornings by @20-th-centurygirl

i think this is also one of the first blogs i followed and i lovee her work!

insta au’s

needed some space by @ithinkimokeei

queen of insta au’s as far as i am concerned.

flashing lights by @gavislover

oh my god.

oh,baby! by @kepamount

pure entertainment.

#fernadezology’s fic rec #feel free to sent me fics you love in inbox!!#i’m so sorry if i forgot anyone i’ll update this again #fic rec

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sp00kygoddessxx · 5 months

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In the depths of the Hellsing Organization's imposing headquarters, where the atmosphere was perpetually steeped in shadows and secrets, the infamous vampire Alucard reigned as an enigmatic and malevolent force. His insatiable appetite for chaos and destruction had long become his calling card, yet there was one individual within the organization who had managed to capture his attention in a different, more intriguing way—Y/N, a dedicated agent and a trusted comrade.

On one fateful night, the moon cast its pallid glow through the small window of Y/N's quarters, illuminating the modest space. Dressed in their Hellsing uniform, Y/N had just finished a particularly grueling training session and decided to take a moment to freshen up. The room was dimly lit, and the air was heavy with the mingling scents of candles and old leather.

In their haste, Y/N had forgotten to lock the door, an oversight that would prove to be a significant one. As they slipped out of their sweat-soaked uniform, their focus was entirely on the task at hand. The crisp fabric fell to the ground, revealing their lithe form. Y/N was well aware that privacy was a rare luxury in the world they inhabited, but they assumed, as any person might, that their room was a haven of solitude.

Unknown to Y/N, the malevolent presence of Alucard was always lurking, his crimson eyes watching over the organization and its agents. His hunger for chaos was undeniable, but an equally undeniable desire had taken root—a fascination with Y/N, who had managed to pierce through the layers of his dark, twisted soul.

As Y/N stood before the mirror, oblivious to the world beyond their room, they took a moment to appreciate the reflection of the scars and bruises they had acquired during their training. It was a ritual of self-inspection, a reminder of the sacrifices they had made in the name of duty. Their focus was solely on themselves, unaware of the lurking danger.

The sound of a creaking door caught Y/N's attention, and they froze, their heart pounding in their chest. Before they could react, Alucard, cloaked in his blood-red coat, had stepped into the room. His presence was as sudden as it was imposing, and the air seemed to grow dense with a mixture of astonishment and fear.

Y/N's eyes widened, and a rush of adrenaline coursed through their veins as they realized the impossible situation they had found themselves in. Alucard's gaze, which had been filled with curiosity, had now transformed into something more sinister—a predatory glint that sent shivers down Y/N's spine.

In a moment of panic, Y/N hastily attempted to cover themselves with a nearby towel, their cheeks burning with embarrassment. "Alucard! What the hell are you doing here?!"

The vampire's lips curled into a wicked smile, his eyes locked onto Y/N's form with undeniable interest. "Oh, my dear pet, it seems I have stumbled upon quite the feast for the eyes," he purred, his voice dripping with unbridled sensuality.

Y/N's heart raced, torn between embarrassment and frustration. They had seen Alucard at his most malevolent, but this was a side of him they had not expected. "Get out! This is my room, and you have no business being here!"

Alucard's grin only widened, his movements predatory as he slowly circled Y/N. "I have every right to be wherever I please, my dear. And it just so happens that I please to be here."

Y/N, now fully aware of the danger Alucard presented, let out a growl of frustration. They swiftly moved to the other side of the room, away from the persistent vampire. "This is a breach of privacy, Alucard. I demand you leave at once!"

Alucard's laughter echoed through the room, the sound tinged with amusement. "You forget, Y/N, that in my eyes, there is no privacy, no boundary that I am not free to cross. You are mine, and I will always be wherever you are."

Y/N clenched their fists, the frustration and humiliation of the situation mounting. "That's not the point, Alucard. Even you should have some respect for personal boundaries."

The vampire's grin began to fade, replaced by a more contemplative expression. "Very well, my dear pet, if you wish for privacy, I shall grant it, though it pains me to do so."

Y/N watched with suspicion as Alucard turned to leave, his cloak swirling dramatically as he moved towards the door. However, just as he was about to exit, he paused and looked back at Y/N over his shoulder. His crimson eyes held a hint of amusement.

"Though," he added, his voice dripping with suggestive intent, "I cannot promise that I won't return for another unexpected visit. After all, you are quite the temptation."

With those parting words, Alucard vanished into the shadows, leaving Y/N with a mixture of frustration, embarrassment, and a lingering sense of unease. They knew that, with Alucard, nothing was ever as it seemed, and the boundaries between them had been irrevocably blurred in a way that neither of them could fully comprehend.

#alucard x reader #hellsing alucard #alucard imagine #alucard hellsing #hellsing #hellsing ultimate #hellsing imagines #integra hellsing #seras victoria #alucard

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laurenairay · 2 months

Text

comes back to me, burning red - F. Andersen

Summary: Kendra Lee and Freddie Andersen lost touch after he was traded from Anaheim – will a surprise encounter bring back their friendship? And maybe more?

I’m jumping in as a pinch hitter for @misshoneyimhome for @callsign-denmark’s Luck of the Puck fic exchange! I haven’t written about Freddie in a little while so it was fun getting back to him – and thanks for answering all my questions! Such a lovely twist of fate after receiving my own fic from her today.

Flashback sections are in italics.

Words: 7.9k

Warnings: discussion of Freddie’s injuries, light angst, friends to lovers, cheesy flirting

Title from: Red by Taylor Swift

“Good morning Kendra Lee!”

Kendra grimaced, shutting the door to her yoga studio behind her, her long blonde hair swinging as she turned.

“Full name, first thing in the morning? What did I do?”

Her colleague and friend, Mimi, just snickered, shaking her head.

“Nothing bad, I promise,” Mimi said, smiling.

“Still ominous,” Kendra mused, swiping her staff card to log her as present in the building, “What’s going on?”

“Okay so you know how you moving over to Raleigh with me a month ago was to give you opportunities to do more yoga rehabilitation work?”

“Yes…?”

It was true, as vague as her friend was being. Having worked across yoga studios California for nearly 11 years, Kendra had jumped at the chance of diving more into rehabilitation work within yoga. Being made co-owner with Mimi and her sister Celeste was just the cherry on top.

“I was staying late last night to finish up the stock check and I got a call – specifically for you to do yoga rehab for an athlete needing conditioning to make his way back to playing. I know it’s right up your street, kind of exactly what you want to do more of, so I said yes.”

“You said yes already?” Kendra asked, surprised.

“I know, I know, but this is a huge opportunity. I said yes, with the caveat that I would double check timings with you this morning and let them know your availability for today,” Mimi explained.

“For today?” Kendra gasped.

“Yes, I know, but the guy organising it all for the athlete was insistent – the athlete chose you, off a list of yoga instructors based on feedback from other clients you had, and that’s huge,” Mimi said, wincing in apology.

Kendra took the time to think over her friend’s words, throwing her long blonde waves up in a twisted bun, her typical work hairstyle.

“You’re right. That is huge. Surprising, but huge. I guess, uh, just see what I’ve got this afternoon? I know I’ve got a couple of classes this morning already,” Kendra eventually said, “including…damn it, one that start in 15 minutes.”

Pregnancy Yoga, affectionately known as Moms who Move. Not women to mess around.

“Alright, you go get set up and I’ll call them back. Thanks, Kendra. And sorry for it being so last minute,” Mimi smiled.

“Hey, it happens. Let’s stay positive with it!” Kendra grinned.

As sudden as the work was, it really was where her heart lay, so this could only be a good thing right? Everything she’d been working towards?

“That’s the spirit I love! Get it girl!”

Kendra just laughed her way into Studio Two, her usual room, ready to make sure her class was set up in time.

By the time the afternoon rolled around, Kendra was pleasantly tired. All three classes had run smoothly so far today and there had been no major hiccups (or incidents) with any of her students. Even the Grooving Grandmas class (the adorable name her group of 12 senior ladies gave themselves) had behaved today, which only left her in a great mood.

So great, she lost track of time, until Mimi poked her head into the room.

“Hey, Kendra, your 2pm is here.”

“Oh damn, the athlete?”

“Yeah that’s the one. I’m just finishing up his intake forms if you want to join us,” Mimi said with a smile.

Kendra smiled back, nodding as she followed her friend out to the front desk. If she was being honest with herself, she would’ve liked a bit more preparation time, or even a name to start with. Hell, even the sport the athlete played in would’ve been useful, so she could start thinking of a program for them. Hopefully the athlete would understand the last minute nature of the set up. Hopefully.

But standing there in the lobby was the last person she expected to see. Just as tall and gorgeous and imposing as she’d last seen him in Anaheim, before he left over 7 years ago. He was her athlete?

“Freddie?”

“It’s been a long time, Kendra,” he murmured, smiling.

“You two know each other?” Mimi said, confused.

“How are your teaching hours coming along? You can’t have many left now before the next level, right?”

Kendra smiled up at her boss brightly. After her initial 200 hours training, she knew that teaching yoga was going to be her life’s work, even though she was only 21. Having worked insanely hard over the past two years, she was nearly ready to lead classes all by herself rather than as an assistant, and wasn’t that a heady thought? “No, not many left at all. As of yesterday I actually have 990 hours logged.”

“So you’re nearly ERYT 200?” her boss, James, grinned.

The third level of yoga instructor, after two years and 1000 hours of teaching.

“Just 10 hours left!” Kendra said brightly.

“That’s kind of perfect, if I’m being honest. We’ve been contacted by the Anaheim Ducks to run a conditioning class for a portion of the team. There are 20 players who’ve signed up, and the idea is that those who find it useful will sign up for more classes.”

“20 ice hockey players. My God. Will they take it seriously?”

She’d seen plenty of jocks in her 21 years and she knew exactly how much they goofed around when they didn’t care about things.

“Oh yeah, this is mandatory for these players and I’ll be evaluating them to send it back to their trainers. It’s serious – and it’s a big opportunity for the studio too.”

“Yeah definitely. And it’ll be good to see a different type of client for a change,” Kendra nodded.

“We love our yoga moms, don’t front,” James mused.

Kendra just grinned. She did love her beginner’s yoga mom class, he was right.

“It’ll be a big opportunity for you too, to work with them. If enough sign up, I’d like you to take on at least one for solo instruction the moment you have those 1000 hours done, to give you that experience. But if any of them give you any trouble, you let me know, okay? I won’t stand for it, regardless of who they are.”

“Thanks boss.”

“Any time.”

By the time 11am rolled around, Kendra was nervous. Not a bad nervous though, more like butterflies. She was so closed to her next stage of yoga teaching that she could almost taste it. She just hoped that this giant group of giant men would be a positive experience. They arrived in a herd, filling up the room quickly, and Kendra waited at the front of the room off to the side while her boss waited for them all to be ready.

“Alright, thanks for joining us today. I’m James Fields, owner and lead yoga instructor here, and this is Kendra Lee, who will be running this class alongside me,” he started.

She just grinned at the curious looks sent her way. Let them underestimate her, that was fine.

“As you all know, this class is mandatory and I will be evaluating you for your conditioning staff, so pay attention and we’ll all have a great time.”

Kendra watched a few disgruntled expressions popping up and fought not to laugh. Hockey players. She should’ve known they wouldn’t be any different. As her boss continued to talk, Kendra’s eyes drifted across the room, eventually landing on the man in front of her. Well, man was pushing it – this guy couldn’t be more than a couple of years older than her. A broad-shouldered redhead, pretty face, serious expression taking in her boss’s words. This one was paying attention. This one wanted to learn. Good. Even from here she could tell he would tower over her, although at 5ft2 that wasn’t really a difficult barrier. Maybe 6ft4? Maybe? Either way, this guy was going to be a good student, she could already tell.

As if he could sense his eyes on her, the man glanced over, catching her gaze. She froze, a little embarrassed to be caught staring, but he just smiled. Oh what a lovely smile that was. It was all she could do to smile back.

“If you’re all ready then, Kendra will lead you through Sun Salutation to warm up.”

She broke out of her thoughts, waving cheerfully at them all and earning a laugh. “I’ll be gentle, I promise,” she grinned.

“Yeah Freddie used to come to classes at my first studio, back in Anaheim about 10ish years ago. It’s been a while,” Kendra nodded, forcing a smile on her face.

Mimi raised an eyebrow but smiled politely at Freddie. “If you head on into Studio Two, Kendra will be right with you. I just need her to sign a form.”

He nodded, following the instructions with a smile sent Kendra’s way, leaving her alone with her colleague.

“Okay what the hell was that?” Mimi asked, wiggling her fingers in the direction Freddie went.

Kendra sighed, hands on hips.

“That was an old friend who I haven’t seen or spoken to in over 7 years. Him coming here out of the blue just threw me off, that’s all.”

“Is he going to be a problem? Because I have no issue with kicking him out if he doesn’t deserve a moment in your company,” Mimi said firmly.

It was times like this that Kendra really loved her friends.

“No, no it’ll be okay. There was no drama, we just drifted out of contact. Sure it sucked, but it was a long time ago? It’ll be fine. Besides, like you said, this is a big opportunity for me to do more with yoga rehab, right?”

Mimi pursed her lips but nodded. “Alright, if you’re sure. But let me know the second that you change your mind, if you need to.”

Kendra just gave her a quick hug, nudging her friend’s hip with her yoga mat, before heading resolutely towards Studio Two.

“So you enjoyed the last group class then?”

“I did. Anything to keep my flexibility up as good as it can get, right?”

Kendra just smiled, nodding. “Not that you seemed to have a problem with your flexibility.”

“Well I certainly haven’t had any complaints.”

He froze the moment the words left his lips, looking mortified. It was all she could do to burst into laughter at the horror on his face.

“I am so sorry. That was so unprofessional,” he groaned.

“Honestly, I don’t think I’ve laughed so hard since I’ve started here,” she said, still giggling, “You have nothing to worry about Mr Andersen.”

“Please, call me Freddie?” he asked, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly as his cheeks flamed red.

“Sure thing. Now let’s talk solo session scheduling – what works best for you?”

Kendra took a shaky breath as the memories of her first solo yoga session with Freddie washed over her, before steeling herself, pushing open the studio door. Freddie was sitting cross-legged in the middle of the floor on the mat he’d brought with him, and immediately smiled up at her, loosening a bit of tension in her chest. She could do this. She could totally do this.

“Hey, Freddie,” she said, unrolling her own mat.

“Hey Kendra. It’s good to see you,” he replied as she sat down opposite him.

“Good to see you too. I won’t say it isn’t a surprise because that would be a lie, but it is good to see you after all these years.”

Freddie winced a little, making her grimace inside. Was that too much?

“About that…”

He trailed off, rubbing the back of his neck, so Kendra quickly shook her head. Their past wasn’t what this was all about, and it would do neither of them any good to hash it up now.

“You’re here now,” she said firmly, “So, yoga rehab. Do you know much about what it entails or if there’s anything your team specifically wants?”

“Uh, I only know the basics really. Obviously I’ve done it a lot before for conditioning, which is what my trainer said this mostly will be as my injury was a blood clotting issue rather than muscles or joints?”

Blood clots. Damn. And for someone only in their 30s?

“That must’ve been really scary,” she murmured.

His eyes widened a little in surprise, but he nodded, smiling sadly. “I genuinely thought my career was over. I’ve been out for stretches of time before, but never for anything like this. I felt…helpless,” he admitted.

She could only guess he was being so vulnerable because of their history but she still appreciated his honesty. It can’t have been easy to admit such a thing.

“I can imagine you would, yeah. But the team are figuring it out, right? They wouldn’t be signing you up for yoga rehab if they didn’t have a plan in place?” Kendra said, trying to be positive.

“Yeah, yeah you’re right. They’ve tried a few things and they seem to be happy with the results anyway – they’re looking at about a month if all goes well,” Freddie nodded.

“That’s fantastic. I’m glad I’ll be able to help you get back to where you need to be. I’ll do a bunch of research after today, to make sure I’m not pushing you too hard, to make sure I’m doing the best I can for you,” Kendra said, smiling.

One month. One month with a rehabilitation she’d never come across before. This was the exact kind of challenge she wanted – and it would be with Freddie?

“I know you will, Kendra. I trust you completely. I just…”

He trailed off, chewing his bottom lip, his hesitation making her chest ache.

“What is it?” she prompted, trying to be gentle.

“I don’t want this to be it. I’m not ready for my career to be over. I still want, no, need to prove myself,” he said softly.

“Your talent and reputation precede you, Freddie. Everything that you’ve achieved with the Leafs and now with the Canes? How beloved you are by teammates and fans? You prove yourself, every day.”

“You’ve followed my career?” he asked, clearly surprised.

To be fair, she didn’t think she would’ve been able to keep following him after he left Anaheim, but it was Freddie.

“How could I not? We were friends,” she shrugged, trying to keep her voice light.

A wave of sadness washed over Freddie’s expression, making her heart clench in her chest, but before he could speak, Kendra cleared her throat.

“You’ve got this, Freddie Andersen. We’re going to get you back to where you need to be, and you’re going to kick metaphorical ass. Maybe even literal ass if you need to,” she said firmly.

Freddie managed a small smile, nodding.

“Let’s do this then.”

“Hey, Kendra. Thanks for today. I really enjoyed the session.”

She looked up at Freddie as she took her hair out of the twisted bun she put it in for working, letting her hair cascade down her back in blonde waves.

“You don’t have to thank me every time, you know,” she mused.

After that fateful first group class, Freddie has eagerly signed on for more conditioning classes at her studio, and her boss had happily signed him on as her first solo yoga client the moment she reached her 1000 hours milestone. It had been intimidating, if she was being honest, but she was thriving under her own steam, leading all on her own. It didn’t hurt that Freddie was a willing student, keen to increase his flexibility and core strength. And it didn’t hurt that he was absolutely gorgeous either – but that was just for her own thoughts.

“I want to thank you though. The team, management in particular, are really noticing the work I’ve put in as full-time backup, and that’s all down to you,” Freddie said with a shrug and a smile.

“Well in that case, gold star for me,” she grinned.

Freddie barked out a surprised laugh, making her giggle as she rolled up her mat.

“Did you, uh…do you have any more classes now?” he asked, awkward enough for her to pay attention.

“No, you were my last of the day. Why?”

“There’s a new smoothie bar that’s opened up down the road and I was going to go after this – if you want, come with me? I’d love to learn more about how you got into yoga instruction so young,” he said hopefully.

Kendra eyed him for a moment, trying to read any implications or anything untoward in his words. The last thing she wanted was to give off the wrong impression, especially in her first adult job, but Freddie just looked so genuine that she couldn’t help but to smile. A friend couldn’t hurt, right?

“I could go for a smoothie,” she said after a moment or two, nodding.

“Great! Um, I’ll shower, change, and meet you in the lobby?”

“Sounds like a plan,” she mused, “See you soon.”

Within no time at all, Kendra had changed into a cute little cropped lilac sweater and black jeans, leaving her hair down her back to dry in waves. She hadn’t packed any makeup with her, annoyingly, but Freddie saw her all the time without makeup so she guessed it didn’t really matter. Even if she would’ve preferred a dashing of mascara and a swipe of lipgloss. Maybe she’d have to leave a spare of each in her work bag, just in case any future hangouts after work happened.

If today’s smoothie run wasn’t awkward, of course. Damn she hoped it wouldn’t be awkward.

“Ready to go?”

“Let’s do this!” Kendra said cheerfully.

Freddie just smiled down at her, easily towering over her 5ft2 frame with his 6ft4 one – yes she’d looked up his height to be certain, she was curious – opening up the door for her to walk through first.

“Such a gentleman,” she teased.

“I aim to please,” he drawled.

Kendra snorted, immediately covering her face in embarrassment, but Freddie grinned like a cat who got the cream.

“Cute snort,” he smirked.

“Ass,” she shot back, sticking out her tongue to let him know she wasn’t actually mad.

Freddie just laughed, a clear beautiful sound that sent butterflies in her stomach going overdrive. No, this was not the time. Be a professional. Don’t be a giggly idiot. Damn it.

The walk to the smoothie bar couldn’t have taken more than 5 minutes, the two of them staying in a comfortable silence – something that Kendra found difficult with people she’d known for years, so for her to feel such at ease with someone she barely knew? It was strange. Nice, but strange.

“Okay, what’ll it be?” he asked, looking up at the board, “My treat.”

“Are you sure?” she frowned.

Sure, this was her first job and she’d only been in it a couple of months, but that didn’t mean she couldn’t pay her way.

“Absolutely sure. I insist,” Freddie said firmly.

The intensity in his eyes, warm but solid, made her inhale sharply and nod. If he insisted…

“I’ll have almond milk, pineapple, kale, and mango, with a dash of honey. Thanks, Freddie,” she said, smiling up at him.

He just smiled back down at her, sending those butterflies into overdrive again, stepping forward to repeat her order as well as giving his own. When their smoothies arrived, Freddie walked over to a table in the corner so she followed, sitting down with a happy sigh.

“Oh man that’s good. Thanks for inviting me out,” Kendra said, after taking a sip of her smoothie.

“You’re welcome. It’s nice to actually meet someone near my age that as interested in yoga as I am,” Freddie said simply.

“Yeah? Not too many friends or girlfriends wanting to join you?” she asked, somehow managing to stop herself cringing to hard at the wording of her question.

Freddie just smirked slightly but didn’t call her out, thankfully. “No friends who want to do yoga with me, no. Most the team only do yoga when they absolutely have to. And no girlfriend either.”

“That’s a shame,” she said lightly, ignoring the zing through her body, “Yoga is fun and a great stress-reliever.”

“Is that why you got into it then?”

Kendra relaxed back into her seat, taking another sip of her drink, before starting to talk. Over the next hour, the two of them exchanged life stories, getting to know each other properly. Freddie talked about his career so far in the Danish league, how different and difficult it was to move over to Anaheim in August, how he’s just trying to make his mark now he’s been with down with the AHL team most the season and only up for a week. In turn, Kendra talked about how she’d always lived in California, having moved from her hometown in Santa Monica to Anaheim after meeting her now-boss at a training course, how she’d seen her mom doing yoga with her friends and fallen in love with the flow and peacefulness of it as well as the strength it gave. Talking to Freddie felt like they’d been friends for all her life, something she’d never experienced before, and she could only hope this wasn’t the last time they got to do this. Freddie was special, that was clear as day, and she felt lucky to see this relaxed side of him that she doubted many were privy to.

Eventually though, once their smoothies were finished, they had to leave before they overstayed their welcome, and Freddie walked her back to her car.

“I’m perfectly capable of walking across the parking lot on my own, you know,” she mused, jerking her chin in the direction of his car, all the way on the other side.

“And if some weirdo stalks you to your car when I can prevent that, I’d rather avoid you being alone,” he shrugged.

“Aww are you my knight in shining armour, Mr Andersen?” she teased.

Interestingly, his cheeks dusted with a blush.

“I’ll sweep you off your feet any time you need, Miss Lee,” he smirked.

Kendra just burst out laughing, shaking her head at his banter flirting. Ridiculous guy. This was going to be a fun friendship, she could already tell.

“Give me your number? We can sort out another smoothie run,” Freddie said, smiling.

She ignored those traitorous butterflies and nodded, unlocking her phone and handing it over. It could only be a good thing to have more friends in Anaheim, right?

“You think you can handle seeing me outside of the yoga studio?” she mused.

“Oh I know I can.”

Kendra and Freddie settled on three yoga sessions a week for his rehabilitation, 12 in total, to give him the conditioning build up he needed while still taking care to manage his recovery. She’d spent all night after that first meeting researching and planning the best course of movements and flows for him, making it challenging but helpful, eventually dragging herself back to bed at 4am, satisfied that what she’d planned would help him.

With any client, she would want to make sure she was satisfied, but with Freddie? She needed it to. Even after everything, she didn’t want to let him down.

Their first two sessions went well, the first mostly easing Freddie back into the swing of things, assessing where his strengths and weaknesses were, and the second session left Freddie groaning but smiling, happy he was able to push himself. Their third session, which Kendra was preparing for, would be another mild push, nothing extreme but still to see where she would need to adjust any plans.

It was all a process, but one she was enjoying immensely. Not just because of her student.

“Knock knock.”

Kendra jolted out of her thoughts, hand on her heart as Freddie walked into the studio with a grin.

“You are the worst,” she groaned.

“So you don’t want the smoothie I picked up on the way?” he mused.

He brought her a smoothie?

Her lips parted in surprise, but she stuck her hand out anyway, Freddie just laughing as he passed it over. The moment she took a sip, a wave of nostalgia ran over her. All she could think about were the smoothie runs and coffees hangouts and even the occasional lunch they used to go to together. Two and a half years of memories all flooding through her system, and it was all she could do to keep her face calm and neutral as the memories of conversations and vulnerability and laughter swirled through her thoughts. This wasn’t fair. This really wasn’t fair. She wanted to be mad at him for daring to dive back into their past like him leaving meant nothing, but how could she? How could she be mad when those memories still brought her joy?

“Almond milk, pineapple, kale, and mango, with a dash of honey. My favourite. Maybe you’re not the worst. You really remembered this?”

“Of course I did. I loved our smoothie dates,” Freddie nodded, smiling.

Dates?

“Dates?” she said, raising an eyebrow.

“Figure of speech? I don’t speak English?” he offered.

“Yeah nice try, I’m pretty sure your English is better than most people I know,” Kendra mused.

Freddie blushed but laughed.

“How could I forget anything about the girl who got me doing the best Bridge pose of my life, hm?”

She tried valiantly not to think about how good Freddie looked bent over in a backwards arch. Valiantly.

“Alright, but don’t think this means I’ll go easy on you, Freddie,” she said brightly, “We’ve still got a lot of work to do.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” he grinned, “Give it to me rough.”

Kendra took a moment, trying to hold in her laughter, before she gave in and cackled.

“Oh man that was so bad, even for you,” she grinned.

“Not my finest, I’ll give you that,” Freddie shrugged, a light blush on his cheeks, “Still made you laugh though.”

Well he wasn’t wrong there.

Kendra sipped on her drink while Freddie laid out his mat, leaving the cup in a safe spot as she moved to stand in front of him.

“As always, let’s start with Sun Salutation,” she grinned.

The next hour flew by. As she promised him, Kendra did push him hard – some of the poses he wasn’t quite ready for, she could see that, at least even for the length of time they were trialling today. His natural flexibility hadn’t left him, that much was obvious, but there was still work to do. At least she could take pride in being part of rehabilitation that would never push him further than he was ready for. His safety, physical and mental, was the most important thing.

But he could do this. She knew that he could do this, and that excited her.

“Alright, that’s us done for today. Thanks, Freddie,” Kendra said softly.

Freddie opened his eyes, practically floating from savasana, face flushed from exertion.

“Thank you, Kendra. I feel awesome. Tired but awesome,” he grinned.

“Not aching too much anywhere?” she asked, standing up gracefully.

Freddie groaned as he stood up, rolling his shoulders as he checked in with himself. Kendra smiled wryly at the action – at least she could trust an athlete to know his own body.

“No, not too much,” he said.

“Are you sure?” she frowned, hands on hips.

“I promise. I know the difference between aching from a good workout to aching from injury and pain. This is good,” Freddie insisted.

Well alrighty then.

“That’s what I like to hear,” Kendra said happily, rolling her neck from side to side to loosen tension, “Take a shower, Andersen, I can smell you from here.”

Freddie barked out a laugh, shaking his head in amusement.

“Care to join me?”

“In your dreams.”

Freddie just smirked, sending a shiver down her spine. There. That was it, the spark she’d been missing for so many years.

“See you on Wednesday?”

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world,” Freddie nodded.

From: Freddie I have a return date March 7th

From: Kendra That’s amazing! I told you that you could do it! These last eight sessions have really paid off! Do you feel ready?

From: Freddie As always, I should’ve trusted that you were right lol I think so? My body does for certain

From: Kendra And your mind? If you don’t feel mentally ready, Freddie, please don’t let them push you

From: Freddie Thanks, I appreciate that I think it’s more nerves than not mentally ready? Like, I don’t want to let the team down. And I don’t want critics to call me washed up

From: Kendra You could never let the team down They can see your passion, see how hard you’re working And screw the critics. They don’t know you or your body You are the furthest thing from washed up, so don’t talk about yourself like that

From: Freddie I’ve missed your fire. Yes ma’am

From: Kendra Damn right you have. That’s more like it

From: Freddie Can I still finish off my course of session with you? And maybe carry on for a few more afterwards? Just to make sure I still have that confidence?

From: Kendra As many as you want I’m here for whatever you need

From: Freddie Whatever I need? I like the sound of that

“So today’s your last official yoga rehab session with Freddie. How are you feeling?”

“Yeah, it’s all gone really well. It’s been nice reconnecting with him, as well as seeing him grow back into his conditioning and confidence. You were right, Mimi, this was a great idea,” Kendra grinned.

Mimi and Celeste both smiled at her, but the smiles quickly turned hesitant. What? What was wrong?

“Has he said something? Have the Canes said something?” she asked, starting to worry.

Had she done something wrong and he hadn’t had the guts to tell her?

“No, no, god no. Freddie’s had nothing but high praise for you since he got here and I have no doubt he’ll be saying the same to his team,” Celeste said quickly.

“He talks about me?” Kendra asked, not knowing whether to ignore the butterflies in her stomach or not.

“He does. And he always has a smile on his face when he leaves here, same as you. We just…”

“Just what?” she prompted.

“We just want you to be careful,” Celeste said, finishing her sister’s sentence.

What the hell?

Mimi winced at Kendra's expression before clearing her throat.

“When I met you, it was obvious that part of you was missing,” Mimi said softly, Celeste nodding.

What?

“What do you mean?” Kendra frowned.

“This fun flirty side of you? These beaming smiles? It’s great, don’t get me wrong, but seeing you around Freddie makes so much sense,” Mimi explained.

Okay that was crazy.

“We really are just friends,” Kendra said, shaking her head.

Mimi and Celeste send her matching disbelieving looks.

“No, really,” Kendra said, shrugging, “We always had this flirty banter but it was never anything more than that.”

“Never anything more?” Celeste said, raising an eyebrow, “Not even once?”

“No!” Kendra laughed, “He would come to my yoga classes, we’d get coffee or smoothies occasionally, sometimes lunch, but never anything more.”

“I really don’t think you see what we see. What no doubt everyone sees when they watch the two of you,” Mimi said.

“You can’t fake that kind of chemistry, Kendra. He clearly has feelings for you,” Celeste added.

What?

He had feelings for her?

And everyone saw it?

Mimi and Celeste watched her obvious turmoil with soft pitying smiles.

“Think about it. Just think about it. That’s all we’re saying,” Mimi said, her voice warm and reassuring, “And be careful?”

“You’re our girl, okay? We just want you to be happy,” Celeste said, smiling.

“Uh yeah, sure. I’ll think about it,” Kendra murmured.

It was all she could do to walk in a straight line for their staff kitchen, desperately needing a cold bottle of water to sip on while she sorted through her thoughts.

She’d always found Freddie attractive. That was something she could admit to without hesitation. But it was something she’d buried deep, knowing she could never act on it. Bringing that acknowledgement back up to the surface was terrifying, because it wasn’t just a physical attraction – it was everything about him. If she let herself think about how attracted she was to him, let herself think about his laugh, and his kindness, and his terrible taste in coffee, and his soft smile when he talked about his family, and literally everything else about him…she felt like she would explode.

How was she supposed to behave normally around him in their last scheduled yoga session, when all of these dangerous feelings were bubbling at the surface?

No, she had to find a way. She couldn’t ruin everything, not when she’d just got him back into her life. She just couldn’t.

Somehow, she managed to keep a lid on her emotions for her entire day until Freddie’s session at the end of her evening, running through the most challenging routines that pushed him to his limit, but left him with a smile on his face. He was ready. He was really ready for his return to play in two days time.

So why did it feel like everything was ending?

Freddie had stayed mostly quiet, focusing on his movements, but there were times in between flows that she caught him staring at her as if he was thinking. Thinking hard. It was almost off-putting, if it didn’t make her feel giddy. Were her friends right? Were her feelings really reciprocated?

Whatever was going through his mind, she didn’t know, but even she could feel a trembling intensity between the two of them that she couldn’t put a finger on. It felt like…anticipation.

When their class was over, Freddie insisted on waiting for her to grab all of her things, Mimi and Celeste just smirking as he waved goodbye to them, escorting her out to her car. This time he apparently hadn’t parked that far away from her, so he was insistent on walking her properly, although it could definitely be classed as more of an extremely slow stroll rather than a walk.

Like he was drawing this out as much as she was.

“You must be freezing,” Freddie murmured, “Here take my jacket.”

Before Kendra could form a word of protest at his sudden words, Freddie was slipping his jacket off and placing it over her shoulders. The warmth immediately hit her body, thrumming through her veins, and she knew without a doubt that her burning cheeks gave her thoughts away.

“There. Better?”

It was all Kendra could do to nod, staying silent as Freddie made a grunt of approval. Why was this affecting her so much? It was a just a jacket. It was just a jacket, right? It didn’t stop her sinking into the warmth though, picking up the scent of his cologne, ignoring the way her heart started beating that little bit faster.

She had to say something. She had to say something.

“Freddie…I need to ask you a question,” she said softly.

“Go for it,” he mused.

“Did you know it was me when you agreed to do a yoga rehab course?”

“What?”

Kendra exhaled a little shakily, but shook her head. She needed to know.

“When your team suggested yoga classes as part of your rehab treatment plan, how did you pick a teacher? Did you know I would be running this for you?”

“Ah.”

A single word. How ominous.

But Kendra just stayed silent, unwilling to say anything else before he did. She needed to know. It would change everything.

“The team gave me a list of options, with short descriptions about the teacher and any feedback from other clients. And…the moment I saw your name on the list, I didn’t have to think any further or look at anyone else,” he murmured.

“What?”

Freddie let out a shaky breath, halting his walk, so Kendra stopped next to him. What did he mean by that?

“I took it as a sign from the universe that I finally had a chance to make up for letting our friendship fizzle out. You were one of the best parts about Anaheim for me, and I was so wrapped up in my head in Toronto that I was stupid enough to let our friendship go. To let you go. I wanted to see you again. I knew that you would be amazing from the yoga side of things, but to get the chance to say that I’m sorry? I couldn’t pass that up.”

As he spoke, his words clear and his expression more serious than she’d ever seen, her heart started racing like it never had before. He really meant all of that, didn’t he? He really chose her?

“You have nothing to apologise for,” she eventually said, a little more breathless than she would care to admit.

“Yes, I do,” Freddie replied, huffing out a laugh, “You deserved better than I treated you.”

He looked relieved, like her being mad at him was even a possibility (not with them, never with him), but she just shook her head. Yeah, it had hurt at the time, when she finally resigned to losing contact with him – but that was over 7 years ago. With time, that hurt had faded into an ache, which in turn faded to occasional wistfulness. She could never hold a grudge against him for a trade, and certainly not for following his dream. That just wasn’t who Kendra was.

She started walking again, Freddie wasting no time in joining her, even though their steps were practically glacial in speed.

“Maybe I deserved a little better communication but it was so long ago, Freddie. I’m not holding onto past grudges. And honestly, the fact that you chose me because you wanted to reconnect? That’s all I needed.”

“Really?” he asked, voice hopeful.

“Really really,” she grinned, “Although I’m sure you can think of something to make it up to me.”

A grin spread across Freddie’s face too, making her feel a little giddy.

“Anything you wanted, Kendra Lee.”

“That is a dangerous offer, Frederik Andersen,” she shot back.

He just shrugged, grin not leaving his face. “You know I’m good for it.”

This, these flirty exchanges, served to do nothing other than light her blood on fire. Why was it always so easy to slip back into this with him like nothing had changed? That was a good thing, right?

“Come out with me on St Patrick’s Day night,” she blurted.

He raised an eyebrow, looking unimpressed, but she just laughed.

“I’m going to a karaoke bar with Mimi and Celeste – join us,” she explained.

“That’s what you want? Out of all the things you could’ve asked for…you want me to join you for karaoke,” he said incredulously.

Kendra inhaled sharply at the implication in his words but nodded anyway, hoping she wasn’t making a huge mistake.

“I do. It’ll be fun, to see you outside of work, and to do something with you that we’ve never done before. We already have a little booth booked and it’ll be better than cramming into a regular bar for St Patrick’s Day,” she said firmly.

He laughed softly, shaking his head in disbelief, before eventually nodding.

“Alright, I’ll be there. Text me the address,” he mused.

Kendra just grinned, ignoring the butterflies in her stomach as they finally reached her car.

“Thanks for lending me your jacket, Freddie.”

“Any time.”

By the time the evening of the 17th March rolled around, Kendra was buzzing. She'd not seen Freddie since his debut back on the ice, him having given the three of them tickets to say thank you. Watching him win? It was everything, and she couldn't have been prouder of him. But with his schedule and hers, he hadn't scheduled any more classes like he'd said he'd wanted to, so Kendra had been limited to text messages, hoping that her daydreams weren't just silly fantasies.

Kendra, Mimi, and Celeste had been in O'Malley's for an hour, and Freddie still hadn’t arrived. The longer that time went on, the more disappointed she felt, not wanting to believe that after everything they’d regrown between them that he would just ghost her. No, that wasn’t Freddie. It couldn’t be Freddie.

“Breathe. Have a drink. He promised he’d be here, right?” Celeste said with a sweet smile.

“He did. But that doesn’t mean he couldn’t have changed his mind,” Kendra sighed.

“Hey, no sad faces. It’s St Patrick’s Day and we’re having a good time!” Mimi said cheerfully.

Kendra just groaned, taking a big gulp of her beer, her friends just cheering. They were right. She couldn’t dwell on this. If Freddie was going to come or whether he wasn’t, she was still out with her friends to have a good time. That was what she needed to focus on.

“Up next, Kendra singing Red!”

“Ooh girl that’s you, go!” Mimi squealed.

Kendra took a deep breath to steel herself, sliding out of their booth with a confident smile. If anyone could make her feel better, it would be Taylor Swift, she knew that much. As the intro music starting playing, she focused on letting it flow through her, tapping her foot in time with the beat.

“Loving him is like driving a new Maserati down a dead end street, Faster than the wind, passionate as sin, ending so suddenly, Loving him is like trying to change your mind, Once you're already flying through the free fall, Like the colors in autumn, so bright, just before they lose it all.”

As if summoned by magic, the door to the pub opened, and Freddie walked in. Within seconds he saw her standing on the karaoke stage and stopped in his tracks, offering her a small stunned smile. He came. He didn’t ghost her. Freddie actually came as she asked him. That had to mean something, right?

“Remembering him comes in flashbacks and echoes, Tell myself it's time now gotta let go, But moving on from him is impossible, When I still see it all in my head, In burning red, Burning, it was red.”

She found herself pouring her emotions into the words, pouring everything she felt about Freddie into the song, not able to take her eyes off him. By now, Mimi and Celeste had noticed how she was performing just for Freddie – she could see their grins from across the room – and a few other patrons were starting to notice too. But she couldn’t stop herself. Her body felt almost out of control, singing her heart out to the only man who’d ever truly held it.

“Oh, losing him was blue, like I'd never known, Missing him was dark gray, all alone, Forgetting him was like trying to know, Somebody you never met, 'Cause loving him was red, Yeah, yeah, red, Burning red.”

His eyes were almost wild, locked onto her like she was the only person in the room. It was a heady feeling, giving her the confidence she needed to finish the song with a smile.

“And that's why he's spinning 'round in my head, Comes back to me, burning red, Yeah, yeah.”

She curtseyed dramatically to cheers and applause as the song ended, a wide grin on her face, and she moved to step off the stage, Freddie was already there with a hand extended to help her down. She took it silently, inhaling sharply as Freddie didn’t let go – instead her guided her across the room to the bar, the crowd parting with whatever intensity was on his face, so much so that they were served immediately.

“Two baby guinnesses,” Freddie asked politely.

The barman just laughed, nodding as he poured the shots, Freddie not letting go of her hand even as he paid for their drinks. He passed her one of the shots with a hopeful smile, the sweetness in his eyes intoxicating, so she clinked the glass gently with his, the cool liquid sliding down her throat smoothly.

“I wasn’t sure if you would make it,” Kendra said, offering him a small smile.

“I was thinking. Thinking about a lot of things. And I have something I need to say,” Freddie murmured, voice barely audible above the rumble of the room’s conversation.

“Oh?” she said, breath caught in her throat.

“I need to be honest with you, Kendra. I don’t think I can do any more classes with you.”

Oh. Everything in her chest felt like it was crumbling, Kendra barely able to get a breath in.

Wait, what?

“It would be incredible unprofessional of me,” Freddie added.

“Unprofessional? Freddie, if I’ve done something-”

The last thing Kendra was expecting was for Freddie to cut off her words with a kiss.

And not just any kiss. A toe-curling, melt into his arms, curl her fingers into his shirt kind of kiss. As his hands cupped her face and his lips moved with hers, it was all she could do to let out a soft little moan, interrupted only at the chorus of cheers and whistles around them. Freddie broke the kiss with a soft laugh, Kendra just feeling dazed, but his shy smile just made her giddy all over again.

“I’ve wanted to kiss you for so long. I just didn’t think I could,” he admitted, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

They were right. Mimi and Kendra were right.

“What changed?” she managed to ask.

“We changed,” he said. “We’ve both grown so much in ourselves since I left Anaheim and I am proud of both of us for taking what we need to make ourselves happy and successful. But I don’t want to lie to myself any more, thinking that I don’t need you too.”

“You need me?” she said, surprised.

“I do, in every way. I was an idiot for so many years, Kendra. I don’t want to waste any more time,” he said seriously.

“Jesus, Freddie, knock a girl for six why don’t you,” she said, huffing out a laugh.

He froze at her words, clearly fearing the worst, but Kendra just grinned. How could she be anything but excited?

“I’m yours, Freddie Andersen. I always have been,” she said happily.

The smile that spread across his face was worth a thousand lifetimes. This was what she had been waiting for. Exactly this.

“Now, buy me another drink and sing a song with me, and I’ll consider kissing you again,” Kendra grinned.

He laughed in disbelief but grinned so widely in response that it made her giddy. “One blue moon pale ale, coming right up.”

Her favourite girls night drink? How did he remember everything she’d ever said? They were really doing this. They were finally doing this.

“You’re going to be trouble, aren’t you?” she laughed.

“Probably. You love it though.”

That she did.

#my writing #frederik andersen fic #luck of the puck exchange #frederik andersen imagine #frederik andersen x oc #frederik andersen fanfic #carolina hurricanes fic #hockey fic #hockey imagine #nhl fic #nhl imagine

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