#truly that sam art is the gift that keeps on giving i love to hear people saying kind things abt sam wilson in my notifs

[kayvsworld]

Hi! Do you mind if I use this art of yours as my phone wallpaper?? I love it so, so much I want to see it every day

!!!!! please feel free, this makes me so happy, i'm glad you liked it!!! everyone deserves to see sam wilson every day <3

#truly that sam art is the gift that keeps on giving i love to hear people saying kind things abt sam wilson in my notifs #thank u for asking first!!! it's ok to use any of my art as backgrounds/wallpapers/etc/etc #i just ask that if it's an icon or a header or something u credit in your bio etc. but for wallpapers??? full speed ahead thats delightful #kayvswords

[winchestershiresauce]

Be a Good Girl

Summary: After Dean finds out that you drank the last of his good whiskey, your boyfriend Sam decides he knows just how you can make it up to his brother.

Dean x Reader, slight/implied Sam x Reader (no wincest)

2215 words

Tags: NSFW, smut, kinda looks like dub-con, oral sex (male receiving), bondage, language, mild degradation, mild praise kink

A/N: I have so many more ideas for this, so please let me know if you’d like more/a sequel. <3

My Masterlist

--

You knew you shouldn't drink Dean's nice whiskey, even after the way it called to you. However, with the brutally long day you'd had and the boys asleep, it just looked so inviting. Admittedly, it probably had something to do with the way Dean had warned that anyone other than him who'd touched it would "seriously friggin' regret it." You knew being his brother's girlfriend allowed you some freedom from consequence but certainly not all, and part of you wondered if you could get away with it. Maybe you'd even wondered what would happen if you did get caught.

As Sam crawled under the table in the library to check the knots holding you in place, you thought to yourself that while you’d expected some sort of punishment or having to make it up to Dean, you were a bit surprised at the situation you’d found yourself in. This wasn’t the first time Sam had tied you up (and it definitely wouldn’t be the last), but the way his rope work had you spread eagle on the library table was very new. Sam emerged from under the table, satisfied that his knots would hold you in place, and stood to admire his work. Despite the chilly air, heat blossomed within you with the way he raked his eyes over your wholly exposed body. 

“You’ll be a good girl, won’t you?” Sam asked as he lightly ran his finger down the center of your chest and to your navel, leaving goosebumps in its wake.

“Yes, sir,” you answered. Before stripping you bare and positioning you as a work of art in the library, Sam had hinted at what would be happening. He’d mentioned that Dean was upset about the whiskey and that you’d be making it up to him somehow. You’d thought maybe you’d buy him a new bottle, or wash Baby, or something like that, but Sam had something much more exciting in mind. You felt yourself getting aroused at the thought, just anticipating what would happen when Dean got back.

To put the final touches on his masterpiece, Sam stuck a bow and a gift tag to your lower belly, just above your ever-so-inviting pussy. ‘Dean, take what you want. - Sam’ the tag read. Sam nudged your thighs further apart and placed the brand new bottle of Johnnie Walker Blue Label on the table between them. He smirked and pressed it firmly against you, rubbing it slowly between your lips and over your clit before he pulled it away and positioned it for display. You lifted your hips, seeking more pressure against your now-aching clit, and let out a small whine.

Sam tsked disapprovingly, reminding you that you were to be seen and not heard. “Be a good girl, Y/N,” Sam warned. “Remember that Dean’s in charge. He knows your safe words and that you’re just desperate to make it up to him for finishing his whiskey. Be good.” He placed a chaste kiss on your lips before slipping the black satin blindfold over your eyes. You groaned internally -- you wouldn’t dare do it out loud -- knowing that not being able to see would only increase your anticipation and drive you crazy.

--

You heard the large metal door of the bunker slam closed and your body tensed. While the likelihood that it was Dean was incredibly high, you hated not being able to see what was around you. Footsteps echoed through the library as they approached.

“Well, well, well, what have we here?” Dean’s voice asked directly behind you. Some of the nervous tension in your body relaxed, leaving only the tension of excitement and anticipation. You felt a tiny gust of air on your face and you guessed that Dean was waving his hand over you to test if you could see through the blindfold. When you didn’t react at all, there was a quiet chuckle just inches away from your right ear.

“Looks like Sammy left me quite the gift, didn’t he?” Dean continued. You knew you weren’t supposed to talk -- you were just a fuck toy today -- so you didn’t answer. You heard him approach the opposite end of the table, feeling his eyes on you as he moved. When he picked up the gift tag, you felt his warm and calloused, but somehow soft, fingertip ghost across the exposed flesh below your belly button.

“‘Take what you want’? Oh, sweetheart, you shouldn’t have.” His laugh was a bit dark and, though you couldn’t see him, you could sense his arousal. Your own excitement began to really bloom and you felt yourself getting wetter by the moment. When he picked up the bottle of whiskey between your thighs, you wondered if he could see how soaked you were, just imagining what he might do to you. You heard him open the bottle and take a couple swigs. “That’s the good stuff,” he sighed. “I wonder how well it pairs with this sweet pussy of yours, princess.” He ran his finger along the inside of your thigh before gliding it through your slick folds. You writhed in your bonds, wishing desperately that you could get more, or even just touch him, but you knew it was no use. Sam knew how to tie a knot and you weren’t going anywhere until he or Dean decided to free you.

You heard the wet ‘pop’ as he pulled his finger out of his mouth and groaned. “Shit, Y/N, that’s divine. You’re sweeter than a 15-year single malt.” You could hear the smile in his voice and fuck, you wanted him. Talent for the art of teasing must run in the family. He moved to the head of the table and you couldn’t help the pleading look you gave him when he removed the blindfold. He slid his hand gently down the side of your face and pushed your hair away so he could get a better look at you. Though you bit your lip to keep yourself from making a sound, a small devious smile made its way across your face. Dean mirrored the expression before pressing his lips against yours. It started gentle, maybe a little tentative, but didn’t take even a moment for the kiss to escalate to rough and full of want. You kissed him back hard, lifting your head off the table as much as your position would allow, and Dean slid his hand under the back of your head. Using his grip, he pressed his mouth against yours like it was the only thing he’d ever wanted. He licked into your mouth and sucked and bit your lips with such fervor that you were sure you were dripping on the table.

He pulled away with that devilish grin back on his lips. For just a moment, he paused to drag his eyes over the sight before him. Your pleading eyes staring up at him, your ruddy kiss-swollen lips, your gorgeous hard nipples… He groaned, knowing that everything before him was his for the taking. You let your eyes wander from his face down his body where you could see his erection absolutely straining against the denim containing it. You thought it looked so desperate to be freed, to be touched, that maybe it was almost as desperate as you were. You closed your eyes and took a deep breath to try to calm the lustful need bubbling up through every fiber of your being, but it didn’t do much good. 

Dean dropped his red plaid flannel to the floor and tore his t-shirt over his head. When he pulled his belt through the belt loops of his jeans, you couldn’t stop the low, desperate groan from escaping your throat. 

“What? You want this cock, sweetheart?” Dean chuckled. He dropped the belt and undid the button on his jeans, and every move he made to lower the zipper and push his pants and boxer briefs over his hips was so slow and deliberate that you tried with everything in you to press your thighs together. 

“Yes, sir. Please,” you whined, knowing any punishment for talking would be worth it at this point. You needed him and you needed him to know that. Luckily, Dean seemed to enjoy when his fuck toy replied, because he bit his lip and smirked. He dropped his jeans and underwear to the floor and stepped out of them. He wrapped one large, perfect hand over the hard, thick object of your desire and took deliberate, purposeful steps to approach you again.

“Open up, princess.” You obeyed immediately, opening your mouth and letting your jaw muscles slacken. He grinned and teased the tip of his cock around your lips, and your tongue reached out to taste him. Your tongue caressed the needy red head of his cock and lapped up the bead of precum leaking from his slit. Dean let out a low groan that came more from his chest than his throat and reached up to stroke your cheek. “Be a good girl for me,” he whispered before he thrust his hips forward to shove all of himself between your lips. Once the briefest moment of surprise passed, you greedily took him in, engulfing his throbbing cock with your wet, hot mouth. 

You hollowed your cheeks, sucking him down and running your tongue along the underside of him as he found a rhythm. It didn’t take long for him to begin truly fucking your face and you wished so much that your hands were free so you could touch yourself while he did so. With every thrust, you felt him hit the back of your throat and you couldn’t help but think how good it’d feel to have him pounding your pussy like that. Your clit throbbed and your pussy clenched around nothing, both so eager and needing to be touched. 

His grunts were sinful and you swore you could feel them in your core. He held the side of your face in place as he used you, used your mouth like he deserved to. Your mouth had been what disobeyed him, giving in to the temptation of taking something that didn’t belong to you. In return, he got to take something that didn’t belong to him. You were the prize that Sam Winchester had to offer, and you loved it. Tears escaped your eyes as Dean slammed into your throat, sliding hard and fast between your soft lips. You gagged a bit when he went deeper and you felt his rhythm falter. You hummed around him, and only you knew that it was a sound of disappointment, as you’d been wishing, despite how well he was fucking your face, that he’d slide his beautiful, throbbing, delicious cock into your pussy and thrust into you with every bit of force he could muster. 

“Just like that, baby,” Dean grunted when you hummed, “Such a good girl.” You hummed again, only this time the praise swept over you and you wanted to make him cum by any means necessary. You could be a good girl and you’d show him. You let your jaw hang slack as he slammed into your mouth, as the subtle vibrations of your humming threw him over the ledge into his climax. With one hard thrust sending him impossibly deeper into your throat, he came. His gentle hold on your face was no longer gentle as he pushed you toward him, keeping your head in place as thick ropes of his sweet release spurted down your eager throat. When he finished, he loosened his grip on you and pulled his softening cock out of your mouth slowly, like despite the post-orgasm sensitivity, he never wanted to leave the perfect warm cavern beyond your lips.

He sighed, taking a deep breath to bring himself back to Earth, and you licked your lips to get the stray cum that had smeared there when he pulled out of your mouth. He grinned and you grinned back at him. 

“Sam was right,” he started, “You really are an even better fuck toy than you are a hunter. I didn’t know that was possible.” You blushed, but couldn’t take your eyes off of him. He may have gotten his release but you were still aching and needy for yours. However, you knew that this was about making your transgressions up to Dean, so you wouldn’t say anything. This would make incredible fodder for the next time you played with yourself, or you’d think back to it when Sam took you to bed and reclaimed you later like he did after every time he’d shared you.

“Mmm,” you hummed, “Glad I could be of service. Did it make up for stealing and finishing your good whiskey?” 

“Oh we’re nowhere near finished, princess. I haven’t even gotten to feel that tight, pretty pussy squeezing around me.” He smirked and your cunt clenched, pulsing with arousal, excitement, and anticipation. 

“Are you gonna fuck me good and hard, Dean?” you asked, your expression a combination of puppy dog eyes and a sly grin. Dean ran his fingers through his hair and groaned.

“You have no idea, sweetheart. I’m gonna fuck you til you’re not sure you can cum anymore and you can’t remember your name. We’re just getting started.”

--

tags: @hobby27 @akshi8278 (Wanna be tagged?)

#dean x reader #spn fanfic #spn smut #lemon #dean winchester x reader #supernatural fanfiction #supernatural smut #dean winchester smut #smut

[lovelyirony]

“Did you just hit me? With a pillow? Oh. It’s on now.” for Sam and Bucky aka the weiner club

Sam has seen some questions floating around on the internet about the worst thing that came out of World War II. He has a lot of answers. 

But he thinks he has the final answer as to the worst thing that came out of World War II: 

James Buchanan Barnes. 

What a dumbass. 

For one thing, absolutely wrecked his credit score when he ripped his steering wheel right out of his car. It was a new car too, just gotten and Sam had gotten a fancy car-freshener, not one of the trees that was labeled Black Ice. You know, the scent that every guy-in-his-twenties had. No, he was getting fancy in life. Upgrading, as it were. 

And then this absolute goddamn travesty of a human being with a metal arm that was more indestructible than that one spoon that keeps getting stuck in the garbage disposal and somehow makes it out. 

Steve brings him back. And now Bucky--which is a very stupid name--is currently stealing all of Sam’s fancy oatmeal and he knows he’s doing it. 

Bucky is having a lot of fun at Sam’s expense, and Sam can’t say shit about it because Bucky goes “oh boo I’m a traumatized war veteran who had to go to Russia for like fifty years. Let me eat your oatmeal you stupid bitch” and Sam has to let him. 

So Sam decides that he will just refuse to ever interact with Bucky on any level except Enemy. 

Sharon tells him he’s being a tad dramatic. 

“That oatmeal cost me seven dollars every week and he fucking eats it.” 

“Not all of it,” Sharon says. “He’s not bad, he’s just messing with you. Steve is still treating him like he’s one of those glass figurines that Bruce collects.” 

“Bruce collects glass figurines? What?” 

“Yeah. I think he finds them in thrift shops and just collects them. I can’t decide if it’s an intimidation tactic for the Hulk or for Tony.” 

“Tony is scared of glass figurines?” 

“He’s scared of breaking stuff. Don’t ask, it involves Pepper.” 

“Oh. I think it’s weird that you know him on such a personal level.” 

“Why?” 

“I was literally just telling you the last time I went grocery shopping and you told me, and I quote, ‘stop telling me all this personal shit I have limited memory storage in my brain’.” 

“It’s because I do. I don’t give a shit about your grocery purchases unless any of it is for me.” 

“Very self-centered.” 

“Quite. But give Bucky a little leeway.” 

“Absolutely not.” 

- 

Bucky absolutely knows what he is doing. He really and truly does. He’s been texting Maria Hill about the whole thing, who finds it absolutely hilarious. 

In fact, everyone knows what he’s doing. Except for Steve, which makes it even funnier. 

Steve is under the impression that Bucky has no idea that that was Sam’s oatmeal, or Sam’s favorite coffee cup. 

He most definitely knows it. But Sam has funny reactions, and in all honesty, a lot of it isn’t that big a deal. 

And then Sam wacks him with a pillow. 

“You hit me. With a pillow.” Sam wacks him again. 

“Oh, it’s on now.” 

The Pillow Wars commence. 

There are three rules: 

1.) No headshots. Those are mean and stupid and bad. 

2.) You cannot use any of the pillows that Tony or Pepper bought. Both are incredibly enamored with their own interior design and decoration choices, and will not be messed with. It took Bucky only once to learn this. He was threatened to be launched out by an arm, and it wasn’t gonna be his left. 

3.) Steve and Bruce cannot know

This is mainly for humor purpose. Steve--maybe--would be fine with it. Bruce knows too much about how brains work and how maybe Bucky gets hit with a pillow and Something Bad happens. 

So begins the Secret War. 

Sam ditches an official interview to sneak on a plane and absolutely wreck Bucky with pillows. 

Bucky stealth attacks from ceilings. 

The most entertaining is when other people are in the room and the AI Friday informs of “Dr. Banner’s” or “Captain Rogers’s” imminent arrival. 

“Hey Steve-o,” Bucky says, just casually draping his arm over Sam’s shoulders. (And potentially maybe holding him quite tightly so as to not have him escape. He’s made the mistake before.) “What’s going on in the world with you?” 

“Nat and I are going to practice parkour,” Steve says. “You guys have gotten...closer?” 

“Yeah,” Sam says, grinning. “Best buds, us two. Peas in a pod.” 

“Or more,” Steve teases. “I’m right, right? The hugs, the way that Sam was on top of you earlier, Buck...my two friends dating?” 

They freeze. 

They can’t tell him no, because then Steve is going to know that they’ve been fighting. 

“Yes,” Bucky answers. “Sam asked me out a couple weeks ago. We’ve been trying to take it slow, but you know how modern men are. Too quick for their own damn good.” 

Sam wants to fucking murder him. 

Because this? Exactly what he wanted to avoid. 

“I hate you.” 

“Love you too. Baby.” 

“Oh, ‘baby’? That’s the one you’re going with? Listen you fucking asshole--” 

“Nope! Sorry!” 

- 

This leads to dating. And even more lying. 

Because Sam has to keep it up and pretend like he’s been sharing his oatmeal. They have to go out on actual dates because Steve “checks in” on his runs that he takes (he takes multiple because he’s insane) and they have to be in love. 

It is disgusting. 

Bucky has had to use hard-earned money to get Sam stupid shit like flowers and “just thinking of you” gifts and a birthday present. He had to spend money on a nice shirt and a cute plant that Sam will like. 

This is what changes things, by the way. 

Bucky was not supposed to be thinking about how Sam has been wanting a peppermint plant for a while, but he won’t fucking shut up about it and he won’t stop telling Bucky about all the cute pots that he wants to put it in and Bucky was not supposed to go to the nursery and go get it. 

But he did. Because Sam wouldn’t shut up and Bucky wasn’t gonna be a basic bitchy boyfriend and get him flowers and a dinner. That is for losers. Which Bucky most certainly is not. 

Sam is surprised that Bucky is listening. 

And then they realize that it’s not exactly that they’re mad that they’re dating. In fact, Sam kind of likes having a special someone to go to breakfast with, even if Bucky kind of hates the diner he keeps choosing. 

(To be fair their muffins are dry but also to be fair Bucky will simply not order an omelette, which is their best option.) 

Maybe Bucky likes remembering fun little facts about Sam, like how he hates red petunias because his old neighbor always had them everywhere, or how he secretly thought that Captain America was literally just a media project meant to consider how well propaganda worked on the American people. 

(If Bucky hadn’t remembered that Steve was literally just That Stupid, he probably would’ve agreed with that theory.) 

So now they have Stupid Feelings. This Sucks. 

Also? Sharon is laughing at Sam, because she’s a terrible gay best friend. 

“You’re gay too, so that makes us just friends. Cancels all that shit out. But it doesn’t change the fact that you’re stupid and didn’t recognize that you liked him. It literally took Steve assuming you were a couple to get this whole thing rolling.” 

“Wait, so you knew? Why didn’t you tell me?” 

“Sam I’m sorry you have to hear it from me, but I had a hell of a lot more faith in you than I should have. Is that a sin? That should be a sin.” 

“I will literally write you out of my will just watch me.” 

“Who else is going to take your ugly paintings, Sam? Who? Steve? He went to art school for a year. He knows quality.” 

“I hate you.” 

“Yeah, just like you hate Bucky,” Sharon says, laughing. “Have fun with that, by the way. Hope you confess your feelings soon!” 

- 

Sam is not having fun with this. No, not at all. 

It’s mostly because Bucky is still stealing his oatmeal and they’re in Public and he can’t confess his feelings. It’s just not convenient. Also Bucky is having a lot of conversation with a certain guy that Tony knows in one way or another, and they’ve hit it off. 

Steve is looking at Bucky. 

“Huh, he seems to like that guy a lot, they’ve been talking for a while. You know him, Sam?” 

“No,” Sam says. “But I’m sure everything is fine.” 

(Well everything is probably fine on Bucky’s end. Sam is trying Very Hard to not be jealous at all. People talk all the time. He’s talking to Steve right now. It doesn’t mean he’s going to do anything to Steve.) 

(It’s not working, if you wanted clarification. The whole “I’m not actually jealous” thought.) 

- 

He hits Bucky with another pillow. 

“What the hell?” Bucky mutters, flicking on the light. 

“Come to bed, asshole.” 

“I hate you,” Bucky grumbles, shrugging off his tuxedo jacket. “Let me get into my pajamas first before you start a pillow war.” 

“Surprised you came home at all. Thought you and that guy were getting awfully cozy.” 

“Ain’t my type,” Bucky answers, “and his wife wasn’t my type either.” 

“Then who is?” 

Bucky looks at him. 

“You seriously wanna know?” 

“If you’ll answer, yeah.” 

“Sam, my type is someone who is an absolute asshole who I hate a lot.” 

Sam blinks. 

“You wanna know what my type is, Barnes?” 

“Who?” 

“Someone who keeps stealing my fucking oatmeal.” 

Bucky stops and pauses. Then starts shaking with laughter. 

“We really are the worst, aren’t we?” 

“In a sense, yeah. We have an early breakfast tomorrow with Maria and Pepper, by the way. So come to bed.” 

“Yes, dear.” 

Doesn’t matter if it’s said sarcastically. Sam still likes it. 

- 

There’s a part to this story you should know: 

Steve’s absolutely not stupid about this certain situation. He knew Bucky was a little shit who kept stealing oatmeal. He also knew that Sam liked him, even if he didn’t recognize it himself. 

By him insinuating that he thought they were dating, he knew they would never crush his dreams. He’s secretly a manipulative genius like that. 

(It also helps that Maria owes him about a thousand dollars or five favors, give or take a couple.) 

#surprise surprise sam and bucky are too busy acting like assholes to realize they like each other #steve rogers #sam wilson #bucky barnes #sharon carter #maria hill #lovelyirony writes #anyways sam is cool

[kirathehyrulian]

🎅2019 SPN J2 XMAS GIFT EXCHANGE🎅

🎁Gift for Themegalosaurs🎁

(Please do not repost or alter. At the very least, please give me credit.) |LJ community: spnj2xmas |Giftee: @themegalosaurus | LJ Post

​Gifter: kirathehyrulian Title: Don’t Play With Your Food Rating: G Pairings: Gen Warnings: None

Summary: Witch!Sam isn’t playing with his food, honest.

For more art from me please check out my “myart” tag here on Tumblr. 👇 (Bonus Doodle and Artist Notes down below) 👇

Artist Notes:

I’m still new to it myself, but for those that don’t know what this fandom activity is, it’s a gift exchange where instead of buying gifts you use your artistic skills to create a work based on one or more of the five prompts while keeping in mind the wants and dnw’s of the giftee. Your chosen giftee is handpicked by the mods based on your can do’s and can not do’s that you listed on your sign-up sheet. It’s a great way to encourage creativity and community in the fandom.

I signed up as a pinch-hitter. This means that in the unfortunate event someone has to drop out, I will be asked to fill in for them. I won’t participate in the main exchange, but I will be able to ensure someone will get their gift for this event. Which is a role I feel more comfortable with.

Anyways, I was asked a few days ago to fill in. I said yes and got started right away. I wanted to make it for the pitch hitter deadline, so the past few days were dedicated to this. Lol, I told the community rep that I was busy with two other projects and I couldn’t make anything complicated. But, that went out the window when I got crackin.

It’s like artist masochism or something. First, it was just going to be a simple drawing of Sam, then I wanted to add the fox, then I wanted to add a background and foreground, then shading, till finally, I decided to add color. x_x  I guess I was just wanted to make a good gift worth gifting. I’m happy with how it turned out, so I think I did so, but that is truly up to the giftee to decide.

I took a literal approach to the prompt list instead of the metaphorical one that was probably supposed to be intended. I know that the giftee likes Sam and the prompt said hocus pocus. So, witch!Sam. The prompts mentioned a heart, robin eggs, hearing, a skeleton in a closet, nothing wasted, nature, and young.

So, we get recycled food, drying herbs, young witch Sam, a skeleton in a closet, a nest with robin eggs, ears and a heart in jars. Also, the likes listed cracky subjects and Sam’s hobbies. So, we get Sam experimenting with raising zombie food, keeping a bunch of books like the bibliophile he is, and drying herbs.

Sam’s known for his relationship with yellow eyes, but I’ve always thought that if Sam had a natural power/aura it would always look orange or copper. Plus, Jared has fox eyes, so instead of the typical dog, wolf, or cat familiar I gave Sam a cuddly fox instead. Lastly, I don’t really like using the child actors as references when I draw young Sam or Dean. So, I was trying to use the very few child pics of Jared I found to make a young!Sam.

Now the bonus for those that made it this far:

Witch!Sam isn’t playing with his food, honest. He was playing with Dean’s. Haha.

I really love the cute zombie food. That tomato eating the peach.^u^ The half eaten hamburger is also a fav.The grumpy banana peel is upset that he doesn’t have his banana no more. The freshly risen bread had a good sleep and is ready to feast on the flesh of his brethren. And poor orange didn’t get reanimated right so he’s a little sick.

Enjoy, if you can!♥♥♥

Musical Inspiration (Things that I listened to this time to get in the mood to draw, but not meant as an accompaniment to the fic):

I didn't listen to anything specifically for this work, but I did frequently listen to Billie Eilish- Lovely, Billie Eilish- Bury a Friend, Aquilo- Silhouette, Billie Eilish- Everything I Wanted

#supernatural #spn #sam winchester #spn fanart #spn art #young!sam #witch!sam #spn humor #sam winchester appreciation #dean winchester #in the bonus art #myart #christmas #spnj2xmas exchange #2019 #spn event

[imaginationintowords]

Not Good Enough *part three*

Avengers x Reader miniseries.

Avengers x reader angst.

word count: 2169 

Plot: The Avengers discover the reader has left.

Part one [x] Part two [x]

Tagged: @firstonetoleave @nerdy-jelly-art @const4ntines @coldfacedwarf @mrs-hemmo1999 @l0kisbitch @lula132 @thetimidsarcasticcat @1awesomeash @littlephoenix-fire @xxxxnovagalaxyxxxx @inumorph @babymintuniverse @ohmygoditsanthonyedwardstark @thefridgeismybestie @strangersstranger

Permanent tagged: @purplesatinsheets @definitelynotafangirl @1awesomeash @princess-evans-addict

__________

[still at the Avengers compound]

[third person POV]

"Did she leave anything else?" Steve asked Bucky.

"She also left her laptop and phone." Bucky tells them.

"F.R.I.D.A.Y. call everyone to the common room now, please." Tony says.

A few minutes later all the Avengers were sitting in the common room, not really knowing why.

"What's going on Tony?" Wanda asks.

"[Y/N] left." he tells the group.

"What do you mean left? Like for a vacation?" Bruce asked, confused.

"No. She's gone. She left this note in her room." Steve explains, handing the note over to Bruce to have a look at.

"I told you two, were too harsh to her about the accident." Thor says.

"It was only a suspension. We've all had them. It's not like we wanted her gone." Tony defends.

"Let's not fight about how we handled that situation. We admit our mistake and regret the way we handled it. We impulsively acted on our anger." Steve speaks up, trying to keep everyone at bay.

"When was the last time anyone saw or heard from her?" Tony asks the room.

Everyone paused to take a moment to think.

"Wanda, what about you? Your room is right next door."

"I haven't heard her any noise from her room in a long time. Last time I heard anything was probably a week ago. I didn't give it much thought. I wouldn't think she would just leave." Wanda sadly says.

"Where would she go?" Bruce asked, handing the note back to Steve.

F.R.I.D.A.Y's voice cuts through the room, before anyone could answer.

"Sorry to interrupt, but there's a Norman Osborn on the phone for you, Mr. Stark."

"Of course he is." Tony rolls his eyes.

"Patch him through to my phone please." he says pulling out his phone.

"Norman." he says stoically.

"Tony. Lovely to hear your voice!" Norman chirps.

"I can only imagine why you're calling." Tony says trying to maintain his anger.

There's no one he hated more than Norman Osborn.

"Oh, I bet you know exactly why I'm calling." Norman smirks through the phone.

“Cut the shit and tell me.” Stark said, getting more angry by the second.

“I just wanted to call and thank you.” Norman said.

“For what?” Tony asked.

“For letting go your best employee.”

“What are you talking about?” Tony asked confused.

“Wow. I can see how much you truly appreciated her.” Norman quipped.

“Who are you-” Tony began, thinking about who Norman is possibly talking about, then it all clicked.

“[Y/n]?” Tony asked, everyone turned their heads towards him.

“Ding. Ding. Ding.” Norman remarked.

“[Y/n] is working for you?”

“Yes. She just called, asking for a job. Was very surprised to hear you had let her go. Didn’t know you could make dumb decisions.” Norman continued.

“Well I just wanted to call and thank-you. Expect a gift basket soon. Bye Tony.” Norman smugly said, before hanging up on Tony.

“Son of a bitch!” Tony yelled.

"What's the matter?" Steve asked.

"Is [Y/n] okay?" Bucky asked in unison with Steve.

"That was just Norman Osborn, informing me that [Y/n] is going to be working for him." Tony said through gritted teeth.

"What? Why would she do that?" Bruce asked, confused.

"Because apparently I fired her."

"All we did was suspend her" Steve said, "Why would she think that?"

"I mean you did treat her like complete shit." Thor said matter-of-factly.

"You need to fix this. Now." Bucky told Tony and Steve.

"She's one of the best members on this team." Bucky continued.

"I think I might know where she could be." Tony said grabbing his jacket off of the chair.

"I'm coming with you," Steve said, "We both need to fix this mess."

They both left quickly.

"I don't know why you guys are bothering. She clearly doesn't want to be a part of this team." Natasha remarked, rolling her eyes.

"Because she thinks we all hate her. She thinks we wanted this." Bucky tells her, trying not to get angry.

"But maybe it's for the better."

"What the hell are you eve saying, Natasha?" Sam asked.

"I mean maybe this is what she wanted. She's the one that left. Maybe she thought it was for the better." she tried defending herself.

"She only thought that because she thinks we all hate her." Bucky says.

"She at least needs to know we don't hate her, and we didn't want this." Bucky finishes before leaving the room.

"What the hell is even his problem? If anyone should be upset at her, it's him. She almost cost him his life."

"She made a mistake, Nat. You've done the same. Plus, Bucky was really close to [Y/n]." Wanda speaks up.

"Let's just hope Tony and Steve can bring her back." Sam says before leaving the room to check on Bucky.

__________

{[Y/n]'s POV}

"Are you sure this is correct? I don't want to be mixing up chemicals and having everything exploding in my face." Peter asks me.

It was after dinner and I came over to help Peter with his chemistry project.

"Yes, it's going to work. Trust me, I do this for a living." I rol lmy eyes at him.

"Fine. I'll write it down, but if this explodes in my face, expect a phone call from Mrs. Johnson." he says writing down the formulas.

"Please, Mrs. Johnson loves me."

All of a sudden my ears picked up the sound of a very familiar car coming from outside. I jumped out of my seat and rushed towards the window in Peter's room.

And there it is, Tony's car.

The doors opened and out came Tony and Steve.

"Shit." I whispered.

"What's wrong?" Peter asked, walking towards the window.

"Woah. That's Iron Man and Captain America." he said, surprised to see the two heroes walking into our building.

"Yup, that's them." I said, feeling sick to my stomach.

"Are you okay?" You look like you saw a ghost." Peter asks.

Crap. I forgot Peter doesn't know. All he knew was I had a lab job upstate. It was for his own safety that he knew nothing about my avenging life.

"Well, I haven't been totally honest with you." I swallowed, anxiously looking around his room, afraid Tony and Steve will find me in here.

"What do you mean?"

"You know that job I had, upstate?"

"Yeah?"

"Well, it's a bit more complicated than that."

"How so?" he asked confused about what was going on.

I was having an internal battle about how much I should tel him.

I mean it's Peter, I can trust him.

"For starters, I used to work for Tony Stark." I tell him.

"Wait, what?"

"Well it was more like with him, instead of for him."

"Wait. With him? Wha-" he was cut off by me opening the door telekinetically.

"Surprise." I awkwardly said.

"You-you just opened that with-without-" Peter was at a lost for words, trying to peace everything together.

"Yup." I said walking out of the room, Peter following close by.

"Wait! You were an Avenger!" Peter exclaimed.

"Shh. Yes, I was." I shush him, moving to the front door, to listen out for Tony and Steve.

"Woah. That's so cool!" Peter gushed.

I could hear the elevator door ding, followed by Tony and Steve's walking.

"I'm going to need you to be quiet for the next couple of minutes okay. Tony and Steve cannot know I am here." I tell him, telepathically.

"What the-" Peter was caught off guard, I quickly threw my hand over his mouth.

I can read minds also. Now shush.

"What if this doesn't work Tony?" I heard Steve say, as they passed the Parker's door.

"It has to. We need her to know this was just a giant misunderstanding." Tony tells him.

Misunderstanding. I thought.

"Are they talk-" I quickly covered Peter's mouth, and pointed to his head.

Steve has super hearing. Talk to me through your mind, as if you were talking to me out loud. I tell him.

"Sorry. This is all new to me. Are they talking about you?" He asks, I shrug my shoulders, going back to listening in on them.

I can hear them knocking on my grandma's door, then the door opening.

"Tony? Steve?" I heard my grandma say.

"Hi Evelyn. We were hoping to speak to [Y/n]." Tony said.

"I'm afraid she's not here. May I take a message." I heard my grandma protectively say.

"Is there any way we could wait up for her?" Steve politely asked.

"I'm afraid that's not going to happen. I'm not going to let you two ambush her. If you need to speak to her, I will tell her you stopped by, and let her make that decision on her own."

"We understand why you want to protect her. But there was a big mistake." Tony begs her.

"The only mistake that was made was thinking I could trust you to take care of my granddaughter." my grandma bitterly said.

"Wow. You're grandma's a badass." Peter said to me in his head.

"We're sorry Evelyn. Can you please let [Y/n] know we stopped by, and that we really need to speak to her." Steve asked.

"I will tell her."

"Thank-you. Have a goodnight. Sorry again for causing any trouble." Steve apologizes one last time, before my grandma closed the door.

"Well that didn't go as planned." Tony sighed, as they began to walk back to the elevator.

I stopped listening after that. It was a lot to take in.

"Can I talk now?" Peter whispered.

"Yes, you can talk now." I slid my back down the door, and sat in front of it.

"Do you want to talk about what happened?" Peter hesitantly asks, sitting down next to me.

"Not really. At least not right now." I tell him.

"Okay. Well if you need to talk, I'm here." he said, placing his hand on top of mine.

I felt a weird buzz sensation coming from his hand.

"Thanks Pete." I said, cautiously moving my hand from his.

What the hell was that...

Peter's eyes were wide.

"Can you read my mind?" he asked.

"Yes and no. I can read your mind, but only when I want to. I can control when and when not to read minds. So don't worry, I'm not currently reading your mind. That'll be a total invasion of your privacy." I tell him, he let out a sigh of relief.

"Okay. Good." he awkwardly said.

I continued to stare at him, he was acting weird all of a sudden.

"Are you okay?" I ask him.

"Yeah. This is just a lot to take in. You can move things with your mind, you can read minds, and you're a freakin Avenger." he says.

"Was. I was an Avenger. Not anymore." I correct him.

"Right." there was an awkward pause.

"What are you going to do?" he asked.

"I have no clue." I shrugged, completely unsure of what to do.

"Can't you just go back?"

"It's not that easy Pete. Plus, I already got a new job." I tell him.

"You did?" he asked surprised.

"Yeah. I start a new lab job at Oscorp tomorrow."

"That's cool." he says, with much less enthusiasm than when he found out I was an Avenger.

"Do you still talk to Harry Osborn?" I ask him.

"Haven't talked to him since Uncle Ben's funeral." he tells me.

"It's hard to keep in contact when we don't really run in the same circle anymore. He's at that fancy private school, and I'm here." he explains.

"At least you have Ned." I say.

"Yeah. Ned's the greatest." he smiles.

"Yes he is." I say, standing up and brushing my pants, Peter following suit.

"It's getting late, and I have my first day at Oscorp tomorrow. So I'm going to head home." I tell him.

"Okay. Thanks for the help. Also, thanks for trusting me with your superhero secret." he smiles, giving me a hug.

"You were going to find out eventually."

"Yeah, sure." he remarked, opening the door.

"Night Peter." I say stepping out.

"Night." he says closing the door behind me.

__________

"[Y/n] is that you?"my grandma called out, as I walk through the front door.

"Yes. Who else would it be? Tony? Steve?" I tell her, walking into the living room where she was seated at.

"Ah so you heard?" She raises an eyebrow.

"Yup. Even told Peter about it." I say.

"Oh really?" she asked surprised.

"Yeah. Couldn't really hide it that well when I heard Tony and Steve arrive."

"One less secret to hide." she says.

"Exactly."

"So, what are you going to do?" she asks.

"No idea. This day has already been stressful enough, I just want to go to bed and figure this all out another day." I tell her, feeling the pressure.

"Then do that. Go to bed, and take some time and figure this out." she lightly smiles.

"Plus, you have your first day at Oscorp tomorrow. Give it a week, see how you like it there, you might like it, you might not." she continues.

"Yeah, you're right." I give her a small smile.

"I always am." she says getting up and walking over to me.

"Now, go get some rest." she places a kiss on my head before lightly pushing me towards my room.

_________

As I laid in bed my thoughts were racing around in my head.

Am I making the right decision. Maybe I should call Tony and Steve and find out what they wanted. Maybe my grandma is right and I should just give it some time. Figure out my life outside the Avengers. Maybe this was meant to happen. Maybe I was meant to work at Oscorp.

Maybe I'm not meant to be an Avenger.

#AVENGERS ANGST #avengers x reader angst #avengers x reader #avengersxreader #Not good enough update #not good enough miniseries #avengers fanfiction #avengersxreader angst #not good enough part three #not good enough one shot #not good enough angst oneshot #avengers oneshot #avengers one shot #Avengers #marvel oneshot #marvel angst #marvel imagine #marvel angst oneshot #MCU angst #mcu imagine #mcu oneshot #mcu angst oneshot

[writingfromkitchenator]

I Promise

Drawn/Written for the 2019 Louden Swain Fanfic/Fanart Project run by the amazing @mrswhozeewhatsis!  (Check’m out.  Seriously.)

Characters: Gabriel x OFC, Castiel x OFC, Dean, Sam, Adam, Bobby, Lucifer, Michael

Words: 2,577

Warnings: Character death, angst, depression, some fighting

Based on the song Worlds Collide by Louden Swain

This is the first time I’ve done art for a fic and realistically, the first art peace I’ve done in a long time.  Hope you all like it, it was a blast to build in photoshop.

As always, feedback is highly welcome!

This wasn’t her world.

It all felt different, strange, like she belonged here but didn’t. The air tasting faint, but nature still calling to her as it always did, but this was more out of curiosity now than familiarity.

She blinked, staring at the sun through the leaves, looking at the paleness of her hands, feeling a little exposed.

How did she get here? Had someone saved her?  She knew her world was crumbling, but she had been trying to put it back together, thought it had been working, she was starting to restore what had once been.

“Hey there little lady.”

Making you stay these glory days

Why do they have to end?

She blinks and looks around to the golden eyed man standing before her, his eyes twinkling with mischief and curiosity as he gave her a quick sweeping look.

“What are you doing in a place like this?”

“I wish I knew that myself.” She said softly.  “It seems that I’ve gotten a little lost and stumbled upon an angel.”

He grins widely.  “Ah, so we are gifted too, doesn’t that make things interesting?  The name’s Gabriel.”

She nods, but doesn’t return hers.  “Where are we exactly?”

“In a bit of pickle actually,” Gabriel said, probably a little too sincerely, but he holds out his hand.  “Can I help you get away from here?”

With you my friend, making your way

The older I get harder I fit

A smile reaches her and she nods, taking his hand.  “I’d like that Gabriel, thank you.”

It was the start of something between the two of them, hardly knowing each other but feeling more connected to someone than they had in years.  It didn’t take him long to convince her to stay and it didn’t take her long to get herself acquainted with this world.

Keeping it, saving face

Keeping pace

Making the grade

She started to love this world more than what she had her own, it felt more pure, less corrupted, and Gabriel certainly helped those feelings.  Day by day she felt herself falling deeper and deeper into love with him but unsure how to express it, having never encountered it before, too used to being alone, only having nature around her.

Gabriel protected her, kept her safe and made her laugh at every chance her got.

It's funny how worlds collide

It was strange, she expected regret the first time she really thought back and remembered that she didn’t truly belong here, but was only ever overcome with a sense of peace, that she could look back and reflect without worry.

Taking it all in stride

Gabriel didn’t want to admit that this was what he’d always wanted, some days drawing himself away from it, both to protect her and to give himself time to think.  He knew she thought this world was mostly at peace, that there wasn’t any real danger, and he knew that he was partly to blame for this.

He also knew that she was not stupid.  She would figure things out eventually.

Seemingly satisfied with this divide

He had a bad feeling, so he did the only thing he could think of.

He introduced her to the Winchester’s.

They weren’t happy, keeping someone with her talents in the dark, especially now, but they were quick to understand why, they knew the look in Gabriel’s eye when he talked about her. The way he moved closer to her when they talked about the fight to come, his arm wrapping around her when she talked about helping.

He knew what she had come from, she had told him of what her world had been, and he didn’t want anything like that for her again.  He didn’t want her to be alone.

On the quiet, he asked Castiel to watch out for her.  He knew what was coming, ultimately they all did, and he wanted to make sure that she would be okay.

 “Why do you have to go?” She asked him one morning, wiping her dirt covered hands on her favourite floral dress, looking at him curiously from the middle of her garden, her favourite spot.

Gabriel gives a small smile. “Someone has to go save these losers, right?  I can’t let them have all the fun.”

She frowns at him slightly, feeling worried.  “I don’t want you to get hurt Gabriel.”

He chuckles lightly and comes over to her, pressing a kiss to her forehead.  “I’ll be fine sugar, just…if you don’t hear anything, call Castiel, okay?”

“But-”

Gabriel kisses her deeply for a long moment, hoping it wouldn’t be the last time he could hold her in his arms.

“I’ll be back soon, I promise.”

She watched him go, an ache in her chest, the flowers reaching up for her, curling around her gently and she sighs deeply.

From that first day, deep in the lake

Why did it have to end?

Castiel went looking for her.  He’d expected to hear from her but after two weeks, it had been nothing but silence, leaving the three of them worried, hoping that no one had found out about her.

She hadn’t moved from her garden, her hair wet from the recent rains as she stared at the damp earth, the garden dead, petals floating in the air around her, the only sign of life left.

He kneels in front of her, her eyes red and unfocused and he sighs, feeling her pain.

Carefully, Castiel picks her up and carries her inside her home, the petals finally drifting away in the wind.

With you my friend, floating away

The highest of highs, we'd improvise

“Castiel?”  She asked quietly after some time in silence, wrapped in blankets in front of a fire, her eyes coming up to meet his.

“I’m here.” Castiel moves closer, passing her a glass of water which she takes and slowly drink.  “It’s going to be okay.”

She nods and blinks slowly. “I…I want to help.  Next time.  I want to be there when you face him.

Castiel had nothing to say to that.

High fives and fights like this

On nights like this I long for that day

She was there when it all came to a head and no one got in her way after Castiel got Michael out of the way.  Even though it was now Sam standing there, they had already had this discussion, and she could see past the physical being standing before her.

The flowers on her dress sprung to life, curling around her around her arms and legs, roots bursting through the ground around them all, Castiel, Dean and Bobby all moving quickly away.

Her eyes burned with fury as the ground shook beneath them and Lucifer could do nothing as the vines and roots took hold of him.

It quickly became clear that she was stronger.

It's funny how worlds collide

Michael reappeared, going for her, but he too was quickly bound up.

No one could really believe that she had two archangels now at her mercy.

Taking it all in stride

“I’ve watched one world fall already,” She snarled.  “I’ve had another broken because of your selfishness, I will not sit by and watch you two fools make a further mess of things!”

With a clench of her hands, the vines wrapped around the two throats, cutting off any response that either angel had.  It started cutting into their skin, glowing underneath.

“You’re going to kill them.” Dean said, stepping forward, eyeing her carefully.

“No.”  She snapped, her eyes locked onto the two.  “If they want to survive this, then they will have to leave their vessels lest I wipe all memory of them from the Earth!”

This seemed enough for Michael, ejecting himself from Adam, only to suddenly find himself trapped in the above, Adam passing out quickly.

“I didn’t say you could go anywhere.”  She said coldly, walking forward as the ball of light struggled in the air, her gaze now locked on Lucifer, his red eyes burning as he remained still within her trap. “You two are going to work this out where you can’t hurt anyone.”

Lucifer’s lips curled in a defiant snarl, even as the cuts to his skin started to grow wider.

Dean was now being held back by Bobby.  “You’re going to kill him!”

“Don’t think I can’t force you out of Sam,” She said quietly, standing over Lucifer, her eyes cold. “Gabriel didn’t want to keep me out to protect me, he was trying to protect you.”

Somehow, Lucifer managed to talk.  “This…isn’t…over…”

With that, he left Sam’s body, trapped in the air like Michael.  There was a click and a vine throws something the ground, the two angels being thrown in, what sounded like shrieks cutting through the air, and as the portal closes, all the vines and roots suddenly vanish, petals filling the air, an unearthly silence filling the space as Sam and Adam slowly look up.

Castiel hurries forward and catches her as she collapses.

Seemingly satisfied with this divide

Things took time to settle after that, after all, there were a lot of angry beings that the apocalypse had been stopped.  The Winchester’s and Castiel parted ways for a while, Sam and Dean wanted to sort out things with Adam, and Castiel had a promise to keep.

He took her somewhere new, away from the rest of the world, surrounded by nature where he hoped that she could grieve and recover.  He knew that she normally didn’t use her power like that, that it was more for growing and lifting life back up than for harming others, and that too was now plaguing her.

Her flowers had turned dull and she was seeming more out of place now than what she had ever felt.

“The pain will pass,” Castiel would always say softly to her, particularly on the very bad days.  “I promise.”

“He promised too,” She would reply.  “But he still hasn’t come back.”

“Stranger things have happened.”

It's funny how worlds collide

Castiel did his best to keep her going, checking in when he could with Sam and Dean.  He’s closest accomplishment after several months was to finally get her to stop growing things with thorns.

They all knew it was would take time.

Taking it all in stride

A part of her felt wrong when she would laugh at something Castiel would do. It was innocent enough, and it helped, but it always reminded her of the laughter she would share with Gabriel, often sending her into a melancholic spiral.

Castiel, in more recent times, had found himself holding her when these happened, gently rocking her, trying to do his best to help her through the worst of the pain that the conflicting emotions would bring.

“The pain will pass. I promise.”

Seemingly satisfied with this divide

After just over a year, Castiel happily reported colour returning to some of her flowers.  The boys didn’t understand, but they believed him about the progress, especially when she found Castiel on the phone, joining their conversation and checking in with how they were going.

It's funny how worlds collide

A routine was starting to develop between the two of them, they moved with ease around each other in the house with ease.  She would teach him about the simple things of life, of being human.  He would teach her about the stars above and what Heaven was really like.

Taking it all in stride

Sam, Dean, Bobby and Adam visited, stunned to see the two of them living so easily together.

“You know, I don’t think I ever though that Cas would pass as a human,” Dean said, grinning.  “But looks like you’ve trained him pretty well.”

She smiles, even as Castiel flushes slightly.  “It just takes time Dean, it’s not like it’s impossible to do.”

Dean shrugs.  “Well, it’s good to see you doing better at least.”

Her smile falters slightly, but she shakes her head.  “I’m getting there.  That’s all I can ask for.”

She stays in the room for a little while, but it was hard to miss the slight distant look in her eyes still, eventually excusing herself and heading out into the garden.

“Is she really doing okay Cas?”  Sam asked. “She…still looks pretty beat.”

Castiel sighs heavily. “I don’t think she’ll ever be truly there, what her and Gabriel had…it can’t be replaced, nor would I hope to, but I can be there in the darker moments, help her through those.”

“You’re in love with her.”

They all looked at Bobby, Sam and Dean go to deny it, but Castiel quickly averts his eyes to the floor.

“Dude…” Dean’s voice was quiet as he stares at Castiel.  “Seriously?”

Castiel sighs and stands, moving to the window, where he can see her in the garden, working away.  “It happened before I even understood it and…we’ve had this discussion.  She feels the draw as I do, but we are both under no illusion as to where her heart truly belongs.”

“Cas…she does understand that Gabriel is gone?”  Sam asked. “I mean, there’s no way that he can come back, right?”

He is silent for a long moment.  “I always tell her that stranger things have happened, but the way things look now, two archangels dead and two locked away in the cage without any hints of it changing, and still no sign of God, it doesn’t look like it will.”

“So tell her that man,” Dean said.  “Tell her that and move her on.”

“It’s not that simple Dean.”

“Of course it is!”

Castiel shakes his head and goes to answer but is cut off.

“It would break her, wouldn’t it?”

He looks at Adam sadly and nods.  “She used to talk about finding a way to go back home but…there’s nothing left there for her, her world died long ago and she was the only thing keeping a small piece of it together.  If I took away that hope, she’d go there and she’d die.”

A silence falls amongst them, all silently agreeing that they don’t want that to happen, but not really sure that this is the best course of action either.

Bobby breaks the silence. “Well, for now, until we can think of something, you keep doing what you’re doing Cas, it’s keeping her happy, for the most part, I think that’s the best we can hope for at the moment.”

Castiel nods.  “I’m trying.”

“Good,” Bobby nods and stands.  “Make sure you keep us informed of any changes, I’d hate to think of something going wrong, which it sadly tends to do.  Come on you lot, we’ve stayed our welcome today.”

She waved goodbye to them, not coming free from her garden.  Dean clasps Castiel on the shoulder before moving to the car and he waits for them to disappear amongst the trees.

Castiel had barely stepped into her garden when she was there, falling into his arms as sobs leaves her.

“I’m sorry,” She sobs, clutching at him.  “I’m so sorry Castiel.”

He holds her close.  “Hush now, it’s okay, you did well today.” She continues to cry and Castiel plants a gently kiss into her hair.  “Come on, let’s get you inside and warm.”

“It hurts so much.”

“I know it does.”  He rests his head atop hers.  “But it’s going to be okay, I’m not going anywhere, I promise.”

Seemingly satisfied with this divide…

#supernatural #2019 Louden Swain FanFic FanArt Project #gabriel x ofc #castiel x ofc #dean #sam #bobby #adam #lucifer #michael #Season 5 #character death #angst #depression #fighting

[verobatto]

Destiel Chronicles

(Vol. XVIII)

It was a love story from the very beginning.

Offended (part II)

(6x03/6x06/6x07)

Hello my friends! This is another volume from my Destiel Chronicles. The second part of "Offended".

I want to give special thanks to my dearest friend @agusvedder , this time she couldn't make the gifs, but she helped me with the discussion! Thank you girl!

Ok, now... Let's go straight to the point.

Castiel in angel soldier mode

Coming back to episode 6x03, Dean is witness of Castiel's soldier mode behavior.

The angel moves fast appearing and disappearing (we need to recall this chapter was written by Edlund, and he loves to write angels as dynamic forces, and make Dean yelling FREAKING ANGELS! Everytime he is in the middle of this) So Cas was moving around, fighting with some angels, and being very risky with a kid, touching his soul for information. That was an alert alarm for Dean.

Sam is soulless, so, he can't understand the concern about hurting a kid, and he is more on line with Castiel's soldier mode behavior. In the middle is Dean that can't believe CAS is doing such a thing to a boy.

Cas is so accelerated that Dean needs to stop him somehow. The angel gave just a little of information to their friends.

CASTIEL: It is simple: Raphael and his followers, they want him to rule Heaven. I -- and many others -- the last thing we want is to let him take over. It would be catastrophic.

SAM: You're talking civil war.

CASTIEL: Technically, yes. Which is why we have to find Balthazar and his weapons before Raphael does. Whoever has the weapons wins the war.

So he didn't explain the details, but it was enough there...

Pointing here the fact that Dean is seeing Cas in his soldier mode, is a behavior he will have the whole season, and he will repeat I'M AT WAR a lot of times, as an excuse.

And I'm not forgetting this manner...

CASTIEL: If the angel we seek truly bought this boy's soul, when a claim is laid on a living soul, it leaves a mark, a brand.

Now... This topic had been analyzed a lot here, it would explain the handprint in Dean's shoulder and it also would explain why Sam was pulled out from Hell without a soul by Cas... He couldn't claim his soul (bc it was very difficult to do it by himself). Just a Destiel observation.

Let's jump now to the next episode.

Dean is mad at Castiel bc he doesn't pay attention to their problems

In episode 6x06 "You Can't Handle The Truth", we had just one scene with Castiel but with a huge intensity.

First of all... The episode begins with Bobby and Dean and this question...

BOBBY: Did you call Cas?

DEAN: 'Course I called Cas. He's not answering. Screw him. I can't wait anymore.

Dean is worried about Sam's behavior. He doesn't know what is going on with his brother and he just saw him how he waits for him to be turned into a vampire by a monster. So he had been calling Castiel. And Cas doesn't answer.

This is new for him, bc till now, Cas was there for them. And he was helping them. But since he returned to Heaven, things changed. And Dean felt he was let behind. And he can't understand why Castiel isn't there for him. Or why he isn't worried about Sam. He's so mad at Castiel bc of that. Bc he isn't there for him. Remember season 4? When they first met as I wrote in one of the first chronicles... Dean was pushing Castiel the whole time asking him for help, and he got mad when CAS didn't help him. And they just met! So this time is worst, bc they already are best friends, and Cas isn't there! So yes, Dean is mad at him.

And when Castiel finally appears... It shows...

DEAN (drains a glass of whiskey.) Castiel? Hello? Possible loose nuke down here, angelic weapon. Kinda your department. You hear that, Cas?

The way Dean is calling Cas is like if he wouldn't expect for the angel to show... But Castiel appeared... Bc Dean named an angelic weapon. Useful to the war.

CASTIEL appears. Hello, Dean.

DEAN: Are you kidding me? I have been on red alert about Sam, and you come for some stupid horn?!

CASTIEL: You asked me to be here, and I came.

DEAN: I -- I've been asking you to be here for days, you dick!

Look how mad is Dean. And Castiel's answer doesn't helps. The hunter feels like Cas is avoiding him about Sam's soul but, by the other hand, he mentions an angelic weapon and Cas is there. And Dean is calling Cas dick! He is very, very angry with him.

Now... It comes the excuse...

CASTIEL, abashed. I didn't come about Sam because I have nothing to offer about Sam.

DEAN: Well, that's great, because for all we know, he's just gift wrap for Lucifer.

Ok, we have one important matter here... Cas had pulled Sam out of hell... But the boys don't know that, so... Cas is avoiding this bc he is lying to them. (Yeah.. beautiful Gamble's plot... Transforming an ALWAYS HONEST CHARACTER into a LIAR ONE).

So... Now Cas is seeing how distressful Dean is about his brother's behavior and about him not paying attention to his prayers... And he decides do something to calm him down...

He refills Dean's glass with whiskey while he explains Dean's biggest fears about his brother being Lucifer is imposible.

And why am I so sure about this gesture was made with that intention? Because we will have the parallel in episode 6x09 "Clap your hands if you believe" (Edlund's) in which after being kidnapped, Dean returns to find his brother with a woman in the bed. So he was so mad at him, that Sam decides to give him a glass of whiskey.

The difference here is the huge sexual tension between Dean and Cas.

Dean misses HIS CAS

When Dean was more calm, he tries to talk with CAS...

DEAN: What happened to you, Cas? You used to be human, or at least like one.

CASTIEL: I'm at war. Certain... regrettable things are now required of me.

Is obvious Dean misses HIS CAS. The one that was there just for him.

And the excuse "I'm at war" is there again. And then... Castiel disappears again!

This made Dean get mad again...

But Cas appears again. And he sees Dean is mad at him. So he tries another strategy.

He promise he will help him.

This was a lovers fight, my friend, right in front of our eyes... Because you'll see... Dean is the husband that reclaims more attention from his husband and Cas is trying to please him with flowers and chocolates...

"Sorry babe, I know I wasn't at home these days, the work is demanding me more hours but I will take you for dinner next Sunday! It's a Promise!"

Is so hilarious but so accurate...

But it seems that Cas didn't take Dean for dinner and this is what we had in episode 6x07...

Dean bossy with Cas

In episode 6x07 "Family Matters" Cas is trying to make a diagnosis about Sam, and he discovers he's soulless...

But we will talk about the Destiel fight here...

Dean is being so bossy with Cas... Like if he was his servant or something. And Cas is being submissive, of course... because he didn't take Dean out for dinner... And Dean is mad again.

Not just this but... When they went to see Samuel, their grandfather, this scene...

SAMUEL: This Castiel? You're scrawnier than I pictured.

CASTIEL: This is a vessel. My true form is approximately the size of your Chrysler building.

DEAN: All right, all right, quit bragging. So, you were dead, and...

Dean is cutting Castiel out, and is hilarious... But after this... Castiel has to come back to Heaven, because "he's at war", and Dean gave him a last order... In a bad way...

Cas is being sarcastic here... And we have another parallel with Bobby in episode 6x04. Bobby scolded the boys because they put their problems first. And is exactly what Cas is saying here.

So... Another lovers fight. And Dean being a jiltter offended husband.

And I'm keeping the "taking off my belt while liking my lips and watching you SUGGESTIVELY" scene for another chronicle...

To conclude

Dean was mad at Cas because he was putting the war over his problems.

He misses HIS CAS, the one that was always there for him. And he is disappointed about the way Cas is behaving.

Castiel tries hard to be in two sides at the same time and to please Dean helping him when he can, but he's also aware about Dean's selfishness.

I hope you like this meta! C-u in the next one!

If you want to be tagged just let me know.

If you want to read the previous Chronicles, here's the links...

Vol. XV/Vol. XVI/Vol. XVII

Buenos Aires July 3rd 2019 10:31 PM

Tagging @metafest @magnificent-winged-beast

@emblue-sparks @weirddorkylittlediana @michyribeiro @whyjm @koshisekisen @legendary-destiel @a-bit-of-influence @thatwitchydestielfan @misha-moose-dean-burger-lover @lykanyouko @evvvissticante @savannadarkbaby @angelneedshunter @trickster-archangel @dea-stiel @poorreputation @bre95611 @thewolfathedoor @charlottemanchmal @neii3n @deathswaywardson @followyourenergy @dean-is-bi-till-i-die @hekatelilith-blog @avidbkwrm @anarchiana @mishka-the-angel-of-saturday @dickpuncher365 @vampyrosa @xsghn @foxyroxe-art @authorsararayne @anonymoustitans @mybonsai1976 @love-neve-dies @wildligia @dustythewind @wayward-winchester67 @angelwithashotgunandtrenchcoat @trashblackrainbow @deeutdutdutdoh @destiel-is--endgame @destiel-shipper-11 @larrem88 @charmedbycastiel

#destiel chronicles #supernatural meta #destiel meta #season 6 meta #vol. xviii

[cthayers]

hiya it is sam back at it with another muse already ... so as you will soon find out i have little to no will power ... and i had no idea we’d be able to take up second muses so soon but i literally was already working on this beotch because i knew i wanted to bring her in eventually ! camila is a v old muse of mine that i have never had the opportunity of playing in a group but i figured this was the perfect opportunity and so here we are . 

did you hear how CAMILA THAYER is applying to columbia university as an ENGLISH major ?! the TWENTY year old is living in the WATT HALL. i heard that they got in because they are + CREATIVE and + PASSIONATE, but honestly i think SHE can be - RESERVED and -ARROGANT. they’re a real ACADEMIC. oh well, only time will tell if the SOPHOMORE will make it til the end.  

full name : camila allen thayer

nickname : cam , cami 

birthday : june 15, 1999

zodiac : gemini sun, cancer moon, aquarius rising 

nationality : american

ethnicity : 1/2 ashkenazi jewish, 1/2 english 

religion : atheist  

sexual & romantic orientation : bisexual , biromantic

hometown : hampton , new hampshire & cheraw , south carolina 

accent : twinge of a southern accent , but mostly a posh new england accent

languages spoken : english , conversational french

major : english 

minor(s) : latin & french

hobbies : reading , horseback riding , tennis , piano playing 

aesthetics : plaid skirts and knee socks , clawfoot bathtubs , sylvia plath poetry books , thin framed glasses , pink highlight , wandering through the met , film cameras , hand written letters + PINTEREST

character parallels : astrid sloan ( the politician ) , camille preaker ( sharp objects ) , amma crellin ( sharp objects ) , camilla macaulay ( the secret history ) , serena vanderwoodson ( gossip girl ) , donna sheridan ( mamma mia here we go again )

personality & headcanons 

camila has always been a quiet individual , especially around those she doesn’t know . calm , cool , collected , many people’s initial impression of her is that she hates them due to her resting bitch face and the lack of acknowledgment she gives before she’s truly comfortable around a person 

she does not open up easily , and doesn’t really know how to handle being loved . so she typically doesn’t let anybody get that close . 

major abandonment issues and daddy issues . so she seeks validation from men and also if she lets you in be prepared to fucking stay 

doesn’t party much because she prefers to stay in and study or be with her closest friends , she drinks but prefers small social gatherings with those she’s close to 

has a nasty cigarette habit and shows no signs of stopping 

her favorite season is the fall , and her favorite holiday is halloween 

i think she’s v mysterious sort of ? like , this really pretty girl that keeps to herself mostly , and her small group of friends , but she’s got this alluring aspect of her that draws some near .. v greek mythology siren esque 

very soft , but also not at all ? like wears skirts and knee socks and berets and flow-y white dresses and sits in coffee shops while it rains reading poetry BUT , she can be dangerous . seductive , arrogant , selfish , and quite emotionless at times . v ice maiden type , will use beauty to get what she wants in the most subtle of ways 

so basically she comes off as this sweet , elegant woman with a soft smile who spends her weekends at museums , but when you get closer to her ( if you get closer to her ) you might see a much darker side to her 

kind of into that witchy shit , so

background

camila was the second child born to marianne allen, though her older brother has a different father. her brother was born when marianne was just seventeen, running away from her perfect new hampshire home and her perfect new hampshire family to raise the child with his father in a small town in south carolina 

they had planned to run away and meet in south carolina , though the father never showed . so it was just marianne and this baby boy , but it wasn’t long before marianne found herself pregnant again , another local farmer boy , thomas thayer 

so camila was born , and it was the four of them in this tiny home that barely fit all of them , and marianne was just shy of twenty and didn’t even want to be a mother , so life wasn’t all that great for the thayers . 

camila’s mother was never very maternal , and her father was a drunk . he didn’t truly love marianne , nor did he love camila very much . he especially didn’t love her brother , who wasn’t even his child . 

camila and her brother stuck together , a dynamic duo of sorts . they were best friends and had each other’s backs through anything . at night , when they could hear their parents fighting , they would cuddle up in bed together and talk about their happiest thoughts , the lives they wished they had , so on . 

at seven , thomas thayer decided to call it quits . he left in the night without so much as a goodbye , and though he had never felt particularly close to camila , camila felt close to him . it was her father after all , and she craved his attention , his validation . 

at nine , her grandparents in new hampshire were finally able to locate them . getting cps involved , they were granted full custody of the kids , and camila and her brother were taken away from their mother and put into a new , grandeur home with these old people they’d never even heard about before . it was not a welcomed change , though it would soon be . 

the first thing she discovered at her grandparent’s home was her grandfather’s library . he was a retired professor at dartmouth , and had an entire room full of literary classics , academic journals , and other first edition books . as a child , camila was not allowed in without his supervision , though she often snuck in without permission . 

she was put into private school where she was expected to achieve excellent marks and commit to extracurriculars , though she was so behind in her schooling due to the underprivileged education system she’d faced in south carolina , that it took her a while to get back on track . though once she did , she excelled . they found that camila was incredibly gifted in creative and liberal subjects , such as art , english , and history . still , she excelled in math and science , though had to put forth a little more effort . 

she took up horseback riding and tennis , but nothing could replace the comfort she felt in cuddling up with a good book from her grandfather’s library , in front of their grand fire place with a mug of her grandmother’s hot cocoa , or playing the piano in her grand parents’ grand hall

though she lived a life of luxury , her and her brother spent two - four weeks every summer going down to visit their mother . each year , as she got older , she began to realize just how broken her mother was , and truly began to understand why her grandparents felt the need to take her children from her . 

camila , though not necessarily a tomboy , had always surrounded herself with boys . all her best friends were boys , and she hardly ever got along with her girl classmates . perhaps it had something to do with growing up so close to her brother , and often befriending his friends . 

when she was sixteen , though , her guy friends started seeing her differently . boys , in general , began to really notice her . this was the first time she realized she was closed off to love . she had a boyfriend during her junior year of high school , and on the night he told her he loved her , she simply responded “ no , you don’t . ”

anyway ! getting accepted into columbia was a dream come true , though no one was all that surprised . she’d also been accepted to dartmouth ( her grandparents’ alma mater and where he taught , and where he’d urged her to go ) and brown , but something about new york city was enticing . she’d always lived in small towns , under twenty thousand people , and moving to a big city with millions seemed like a nice change of pace 

she has made one close knit group of friends during her freshman year , though she’s still only a sophomore and we know how those things change . nonetheless , if you weren’t one of those people , you probably wouldn’t know who she was , because she didn’t get out much ( mayhaps she was seen around campus though ) 

wanted connections !

alright enough about camila if you got through all that i’m so sorry KJAHKSJGH but ! i have quite a few connections i’d love 

the close friends she made freshman year . these would be pretty much the only people camila hung out with last year , and though things can change , the only people she’ll hang out with at the start of this year . i imagine this group to be mostly guys ( though not necessarily exclusively ) , because she tends to befriends boys as opposed to girls ? i’d say about 5 people ! ( 1 / 5 )

her number one best friend . this would have to be a male or male presenting muse , as camila has never found herself that close to a girl , reasons unknown tbh , she just gets along with boys better IDK inspo : ( x , x )  ( 0 / 1 )

close girl friend . that being said , every girl still needs her girlies . so she’d be fairly close to this girl , even if she doesn’t open up that much , perhaps the girl feels like she can open up to camila ? this can all be plotted out ! i feel like camila is a v good secret keeper , she doesn’t talk all that much so you can expect her to keep anything safe lmao ( 0 / 1 )

toxic relationship . sooo tbh this gotta be with a muse who is not a good guy , because camila is not that good of a gal ? . i see this being sort of on again , off again ? i’m not sure if either of them truly feel anything for one another , but they must feel something that keeps them going back to one another . though camila doesn’t really open herself up to love , she’s not necessarily closed off from relationships . ya girl needs to be satisfied and she ain’t the type to sleep around ok ? anyway i see them being really possessive of one another and having p explosive fights , definitely not right for each other and yet !!! also just to be clear , i see them as mutually bad for one another it’s not one sided ! just give me this angst pls . inspo : ( x , x , x , x ) ( 1 / 1 ) lukas tozer

unrequited crush . this would be unrequited on the other muse’s behalf . open to m/f/nb and whether or not camila knows there is a crush there can be plotted out ! basically this just goes along with the hc that camila is very mysterious and allurring from afar , and that those who don’t know her all that well tend to be drawn to her and a lot of times will romanticize her ? but also for extra angst i am possibly thinking that the two are v close and camila does know and won’t let them like her buT we can figure it all out . lmao .  anyway ya inspo : ( x , x , x  , x ) ( 0 / 1 )  

also just general plots i’d love to see : someone she tutors in english or journalism or literature anything regarding that sort of subject , bad influence / someone determined to get her out of her shell ,  enemy plots !! gimme girls who think she’s a snob or boys who think she’s a bitch or everything in between , study buddies , girl crushes because camila is bi and thinks every girl is pretty , give me anything under the sun tbh i’m open to so much 

#columbia.intro #this ended up getting so long i M so sorry #just give this a lil like and ill come hit u up on discord or ims !

[xoruffitup]

AITAF’s Broadway Show

WHERE DO I START? Okay, at the beginning, I guess - Deep breaths!

First, I want to describe the beautifully diverse group that came together for this extraordinary evening. It started with me and two amazing girls I met at SNL. (One being @reylonly <3) We sat together during the SNL dress rehearsal, exchanged phone numbers afterwards, and we’ve had the best group chat going ever since. My veteran dad came for me and @reylonly’s military ticket admission, while our third SNL friend had managed to connect with a colleague’s mother, who was an army nurse. The vet nurse loves theater and brought her husband as well, so we were a pretty inspiring group of all ages and backgrounds, and shared amazing conversation throughout the night.

The evening started with a very classy reception. We saw Joanne floating around talking to people and she looked stunninggg. The reception area wasn’t that big though, so we soon went down to the theater to find our seats.

We sat in the 5th row!! So when Adam came up to the front of the stage to give an introductory speech at the beginning about the inspiration to start AITAF, their 10-year anniversary, and to thank everyone who made the performance possible, I was just sitting there basking in awe and the fact that he was really THERE. TALKING. SO CLOSE. No, I would not get over it even at all for the following 2 and a half hours... :’)

I’ve read a bit of Sam Shepard but never seen True West performed live, but wow you could not ask for two better actors to play the main characters: Brothers Austin (Adam) and Lee (Michael Shannon). They said before they started the reading that they’d only rehearsed that afternoon, which is nothing short of INCREDIBLE, given how well these two played off each other. This play is full of furious, dark humor and there’s an edge of potential violence undercutting almost every scene, building the tension more and more until Austin finally tries to strangle Lee in the final scene. These two pushed and pulled at each other, getting in each other’s faces and needling each other with sharp words and insults. It was like the actors had been playing off each other for months; They knew just how to drive each other to the breaking point, and they were each brilliant in depicting the moments of rupture.

Adam highlights: There was an amazing section when Austin gets very drunk. Adam sang twice, the second time a hilarious mix of singing and shouting. He started the play wearing a blue t shirt with a grey sweater on top, but during this scene he pulled the sweater over his head, dragged it off, then bundled it up and stuffed it under his shirt. He walked around like that for a good five minutes. He half-fell against a wall and dropped to the floor, only to do a handstand and kick his feet up against the wall. (!!! This was AMAZING ahaha) At some point he did an INCREDIBLE coyote yelping noise. Another point, he talked with an entire mouthful of water and it fountained everywhere hilariously.

Lee bets Austin that he couldn’t steal any household appliances even if he wanted to, not even a toaster. (Lee steals a television early in the play.) This results in Austin stealing the entire neighborhood’s toasters and collecting them in their kitchen. (“There’s a lack of toast in the neighborhood this morning!” “You need breakfast... How about some toast?” “I love the smell of toast in the morning... it makes me feel like anything’s possible.”) All of Adam’s toast-related jokes were just killer. :’)

Obviously, Adam always looks stunning in person, but this time the highlight was unquestionably THE HAIR. The lush, long, majestic hair. There was a portion in the play when he knelt down at the front of the stage and put his head down on the floor, and !!!! THAT HEAD OF STUNNING STELLAR HAIR WOW. There was also A LOT of pushing his hair back with his hands and it got me every. single. damn. time. Be still my beating heart. (it never does when Adam’s involved...)

After the play ended, the cast stayed on stage for the Q&A, joined by the Director. Adam facilitated some discussion among the actors on their previous participation in AITAF events, and the differences between acting on stage and in film. Then he opened it up for questions from the audience.

Q&A highlights:

Someone asked how Adam manages to create a sense of intimacy in all his scenes, even when working on big films. The title “King of micro-expressions” was used, asking whether that aspect is intentional. Adam first reacted with his typical “what-me-talented?-crazy” look of skepticism, but then LOL he just bust out into every ridiculous face he could think of, to show off those micro expressions. It was SO PRESH AND FUNNY.

A few questions later, someone asked what advice he would give to his younger self while he was in the Marines, if he had a chance. Adam’s initial joke response was just: “Microexpressions” and everyone lost it.

Okay this was hands down the purest moment! The cast on stage couldn’t really see up into the balcony because of the lights, so at first Adam shaded his eyes and squinted real hard when a woman in the balcony started her question with “Hi Adam, we crossed paths back in Mishawaka a few times.” Then Adam saw who it was, grinned, and told everyone it was his high school drama teacher!! As she then began her question, she suddenly got extremely emotional and I couldn’t see it, but heard in her voice she was already or would shortly start to cry. After a moment she managed to finish her question - Whether the people Adam meets and performs for when he travels to military bases talk to him afterwards to thank him for sharing his talent and the gift of his craft. It made me a little choked up too, not gonna lie, to hear someone who knew and had some role in Adam’s earliest forays into theater, be overcome by seeing how far he’s come and all the manifold ways he puts his singular talent to use to better the world around him.

I ASKED A QUESTION AND I WAS SO CLOSE THAT HE AND I TALKED DIRECTLY TO EACH OTHER, HE LOOKED STRAIGHT AT ME AS HE ANSWERED AND IT WAS LIKE HAPPY FIREWORKS GOING OFF IN MY WHOLE BODY AHHHHHHHH. I asked him about how he’s seen attitudes change towards AITAF’s work throughout its whole 10-year journey, and I’d like to think he appreciated the question for his reflections back to their first performance and how far they’ve come since then. Video here because my friend is amazing!!!!

A SECOND BULLET DEDICATED JUST TO MY AMAZED DISBELIEF THAT ADAM SPOKE TO ME. Like, he responded to words that came out of my mouth and I somehow managed to speak said words while speaking directly to him?? SLAP ME IM DREAMING :’’’D How did I actually manage to keep myself together while in close proximity to him?! Let alone speaking directly to him?!!! I SURPRISE EVEN MYSELF. But then again, Adam seems to make the impossible possible :’)

I frequently watch theater, but tonight was really a thrilling surprise. I KNEW Adam would be stellar, of course, but I didn’t know if any of the play’s power would be lost with it just being performed as a reading. To the contrary, the performance style may have even made it better! There’s a lot of raw, angry energy in this play, and this stripped-down reading was performed with an immediacy and visceral energy I’ve rarely ever seen on stage. The movements weren’t all blocked out and planned; There was no shuffling of people or props on or off stage; There were no protracted pauses or fancy stage effects to build an atmosphere around the actors; They created everything with just their voices, words, and bodies.

I’m so, SO immensely grateful I got to attend tonight, because this might have been even better than seeing Adam in a full play. Tonight was unfiltered and instinctive, Adam just going for it and throwing everything into the part for a solid, uninterrupted 2 hours. It was equally stunning to see him just remove himself from the whole 2-hour buildup of angry tension as he started the Q&A. (Though there was a laugh among the audience when Adam turned to Michael Shannon for the first time in the Q&A, like “sure you guys really don’t want to strangle each other?”)

Tonight was wonderful and wholesome, moving and inspiring from start to finish. From the people I shared the evening with, to the frank dialogues that occurred during the Q&A about negative stigmas sometimes attached to the arts within the military, to testimonials of how AITAF’s programming guided military families into shared engagement with the arts. It was wonderful to hear the military audience around me responding with genuine enthusiasm to Adam’s initial introduction, applauding and voicing agreement. I appreciated the chance to hear Adam speak so candidly and enthusiastically about his passion project; Just as much as I appreciated slapping @reylonly’s leg and whispering “Why are his feet so cute?” and “Look at his HAIR.” :’)

TL;DR TAKEAWAY: Adam is truly insanely talented and his selfless commitment to AITAF’s goal of bringing theater to military audiences as an enhanced outlet of self-expression is so, so admirable. This man is never in it for himself, and only puts himself in center stage when there’s a larger utility for doing so. You could see that tonight, when he’d realize he was the only one answering two or three questions in a row and would look around self-consciously to his fellow cast members and say “I feel like I’m monopolizing the conversation” or “Feel free to stop me anytime... jump in anYTIME, GUYS, ANYTIME.” (<Increasingly anxiously)

SOMEHOW, Adam succeeded in the impossible tonight: Making me love him even more. But perhaps having him gazing right at me as he spoke to me was sure to have that effect :’D

Nope, still have no fucking clue how I managed it or how I survived. :’’’)

#Adam Driver #AITAF #Sorry for the grainy pics but I still wanted to use them #Please feel free to ask me anything at all about the event! #Would love to talk about it moreee : D #Would love to talk about it forever!! #Arts In The Armed Forces #driverdaily

[almaasi]

Thank you SO MUCH to the 2,000 people subscribed to me on AO3 (and my 10,000 followers on tumblr)!!!

Thank you for your endless kindness, and every comment ever sent my way. Thank you for getting excited about what I make. You’re all wonderful.

In celebration, here’s some art, which is based on a dream I had the other day. Plus!! Under the read-more: A fic rec of people’s favourite 15 stories, which you guys voted for in my recent survey. ♥

★ A list of the many ways YOU can support my writing and art !!

★ All my Destiel fics on AO3

★ Subscribe on THIS PAGE to get an email when I post a few fic~

Top Voted Destiel fics (written by @almaasi​)

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Try-Something Tuesday · 48k · NC-17

Human AU. Dean Winchester teaches a third-grade class. He’s new to this whole ‘bisexual’ thing - but by pure happenstance, he meets Castiel: a particularly dapper male librarian who moonlights as a substitute teacher. Dean’s curious and Castiel is willing, so why the hell not? Except, fate never intended it to be one-time-only…

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Of Shampoo and Fruit Flies · 17.6k · M

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☆

A Postcard for Castiel · 4.7k · G

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p.S. will you Be my Boyfrend ?

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When Dean’s engagement breaks off three days before Christmas, he’s left with nobody to accompany him on a road trip to his family’s mountain log cabin. His best friend Castiel happens to be available, and is willing to help him through a tough time. But when Dean’s mother and brother arrive, expecting to meet the person Dean plans to marry, they understandably assume Castiel is Dean’s fiancé. After a weekend of comfortable domesticity, sharing clothes, intimate conversations, and definitely-one-time-only therapy sex, it feels almost too easy for Dean and Cas to fake a loving, romantic relationship. The hard part is going back to being friends afterwards. They can’t keep their hands off each other, and they’ve discovered some fun things to do together which they’d never tell another soul about. And, oh boy, feelings. Now being ‘just friends’ is so impossible, it seems as if fate had another plan for them all along…

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☆

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Nine Times We Met (And One Christmas We Parted · 58.4k · NC-17

On the last day of school before Christmas vacation, Mr. Castiel Quinn discovers that one of his young students has smuggled male pornography into the classroom. Upon being told that the photos belong to the boy’s uncle, Castiel vows to himself that he will keep the other man’s preferences a secret. It’s 1947; a man experiencing attraction to another man or fantasising about his sexual touch are transgressive faults, which could potentially result in imprisonment - or worse. But then the uncle walks in. The photos are of him: Dean Winchester, a rogue with an empty pocket and a child to feed. Castiel doesn’t know it yet, but his life is never going to be the same again. Years pass between chance meetings, but even though they live their lives apart, Dean and Castiel’s story is proof that absence truly does make the heart grow fonder.

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Angelhawke · 407k · NC-17

A Dean/Cas Fantasy-Drama AU, set in a medieval world where two men are separated by a curse: every sunrise and sunset, both are eternally bound to transform into animals. Every night when darkness falls, Dean Winchester becomes a wolf, and his human mind is lost until the dawn. As the sun rises, his lover Castiel becomes a hawk. Their story has been the same for five years - until the day that a young thief named Sam stumbles into their twisted lives. Without even realising it, he becomes a part of their destiny, their paths entwined in prophecy and fate. Together with a few old friends, they set off on a journey to break the curse, but it won’t be easy. To pass the time, Dean and Castiel take turns to recount their past to Sam, narrating the tale of how they met, how they formed their profound bond, and how they found themselves wanting what no man should ever want: the touch of another man.

‘Angelhawke’ is a saga of forbidden love, friendship, and magic - but above all, family. Partially based on the 1985 movie ‘Ladyhawke’.

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Sharing the Rain Dog · 19.8k · M

When some asshole hits a dog with his car and drives off, the first two people on the scene are Dean and Castiel. Castiel’s an FBI agent with a plane to catch, and he doesn’t have time to take the dog to the vet. Dean’s a musician, and he doesn’t have the money. An agreement is reached: Dean goes, Castiel pays, and they’ll exchange details and meet again to work things out. But who gets the dog? Sooner or later they’re going to realise that having shared custody of one pitbull isn’t ideal. She needs one home, not two. One stable, loving home…

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Our Garden Home · 36.3k · G

Flower fairy Dean has caught a thief in his trap. As it turns out, it wasn’t a mouse stealing his food. It was Castiel: a hissy, bitey bat sprite with one wing and a forlorn, lonely heart. Dean offers a warm space in his nest, where Castiel can stay until Springtime comes around again. However, Castiel becomes more than just a guest. With a little effort, he helps make Dean’s nest a home.

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#Destiel #Destiel fanart #Destiel fic rec #DeanCas #Elmie writes things #Elmie draws things #Elmie makes things #post of postiness #the dream was way angstier tbh #there were no clouds.... but there were balloons #and dean crying while singing #i might write a fic based on it?? just gotta ponder on it for a while longer #tagging with the title just in case: #Lost Night #* #milestones #ao3 #subscribers #<3 <3 <3 #I LOVE YOU GUYS THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR EVERY LITTLE BIT OF SUPPORT YOU'VE EVER GIVEN ME #I'M SO GRATEFUL ;U; #edit: put the fic rec under a read more because nobody's reblogging??? D:

[mercedesbarnes]

Come Home Soon

summary: Bucky’s away on a mission during the holiday season, and you hope he can make it in time for your Secret Santa exchange.

pairing: Bucky x reader 

word count: 1,867

warnings: tiny bit of angst if you squint, holiday fluff

a/n: Merry Christmas to all those who celebrate today! I hope you enjoy this cute lil story, and have a good day with your loved ones.

I wish I could be there

We’ll do a rain check and exchange when you’re back

Bucky takes a minute to respond to your text, and you know he's running a hand through his hair.

It’s okay, Y/N. You can open the presents without me. I’ll get mine later.

Later is too long

A few weeks is too long?

Yes

“Patience” -Steve Rogers

Hahaha very funny Barnes

Who am I supposed to decorate with now?

:(

Save a snowflake for me?

I will. Come home soon, Buck. I miss your interior decorating.

You don't miss me? Ouch.

Nah.

......

Ok, maybe I miss you a little.

I miss you too.

You can't stop the giddy feeling that arises in your chest at his message, doing away with a small part of your worries. Until your phone chimes again.

Gotta go, doll, duty calls. Ask Steve to help you. He’s got an eye for the lights.

Okay, I’ll try him. Be safe.

See you soon. x

Mindlessly swiping across your home screens without looking, Bucky's message bounces around your brain like a game of ping pong.

Soon. Soon. Soon.

Bucky has been gone 4 weeks and 3 days, an absence only made bearable by his daily texts and weekly FaceTimes. When he calls, his display picture really does light up your screen. The low quality photo of Bucky frowning had been his attempt at intimidation, but he had been trying not to smile at you behind the camera so he wasn't very successful.  Something about the memory makes you hide your own goofy smile behind a hand until you can get it under control enough to accept the call, every time.

Any sound of the catchy ringtone gets you retreating to the nearest empty room so he has your focused attention while you describe your days or if he needs to talk to you in the middle of the night.

But even with the contact you miss him, and it is hard. You miss him like crazy. You miss him in a way that you aren't quite allowed to, because you and Bucky are simply the best of friends and nothing more. Except somewhere along the line you started to see him in a different light, and there are moments, like the display photo one, where you wonder what he's thinking when he looks at you. Though, you don't push it since you'd rather have him as a friend than not at all.

Either way, soon isn't coming soon enough.  

“Who you texting?” Steve asks as he enters the room to see you seated on the brown L-shaped leather couch. His voice startles you out of your staring contest with the burning fireplace in front of you.

“Bucky,” you say with a sigh, locking your phone sadly. “He’s not going to make it for our Secret Santa exchange.”

“T'Challa and him must be working overtime in Wakanda.”  Steve settles beside you and cracks open a water bottle, propping his legs up on the ottoman to warm his sock-covered feet.  "It's supposed to take six weeks, so the project should be done soon."

There's that word again. Soon.

“I know," you exhale, rubbing at your eyes. "I just miss him, is all.”

"Me too."

A peaceful silence settles over the two of you as you watch the flames.  Your thoughts keep wandering back to Bucky, and Steve's reaction means your face is probably doing something to express who you're thinking about.  As he takes a swig of water Steve fixes you with a look you can’t quite place. It's some mixture of curiosity and sympathy and it's going on far too long. For someone who is, as Bucky repeatedly tells you, an oblivious punk when it comes to relationships, you're sure that Steve will figure out what's going on in your mind if he keeps this up.

So you poke his toned stomach. “Wanna help me decorate this place?”

"Let's do it."

"Woah."

"Woah indeed."

After hours of Mariah Carey and Michael Bublé , the room is finally decorated. Bucky was right:  Steve does have a knack for the aesthetic. Thank goodness for the art student in him.

Long strings of tiny fairy lights hang on the walls and around the doorways, casting a soft white glow over the common area and making it seem like snow reincarnated.  A tall fir tree in the corner gives the room a pleasant smell and is similarly decorated in silver tinsel and ornaments, reflecting the light of the stone fireplace nearby. Above the flames hang red stockings with each Avenger's name stitched on them in green.  Steve even tied a bow around the handle of Mjolnir, who had been left on the coffee table. The whole scene truly is picturesque, more homely than ever, and it already feels like the holidays.

You bump your hip to Steve's. “Doesn’t look half bad, Rogers.”

"Not bad, Y/N, not bad at all," he says, admiring your work on the snowflakes taped to the walls. He nudges you again and with a teasing smile begins to sing, "It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas..."

"Everywhere you go!"

TWO WEEKS LATER

"Okay! Who wants to open first?"

Natasha's the quickest and she digs excitedly in her bag after checking the gift tag to see who it's from.  "Aw, new scarf, thanks Y/N!" She wraps it around herself and revels in the fabric, and you smile at your present being well-received.

Some presents are practical, like Thor's to Bruce (pants made out of the finest Asgardian stretchy fabric with “The Revengers” on the butt), while others are just practical jokes, like Sam's to Steve.

"I'm never going to live this down, am I?"

"Hey man," Sam says with his hands up and a wicked grin, "I just heard you were wondering about fondue so I thought I'd educate America's favourite senior citizen."

"A fondue kit is very thoughtful, thank you," Steve chuckles as he carefully puts it back in the bag. "Y/N, go on next."

You tug at the red silky bow to make it come loose, laughing at Sam's high fives to the others as you rip off wrapping paper to reveal a simple black jewelry box. The hinge makes a satisfying crack as you open it and your eyes widen. Inside, on a black felt backing, rests a shiny silver chain with a heart hanging from it. It's beautiful and takes your breath away.

“Who...” you whisper as you lift the chain from the felt, your trembling fingers cradling the precious gift. “who is this from..”

Even though you aren’t looking at him, you know Steve’s half-smiling when he answers. “You know who.”

Of course it's from him. Who else knows you like this, better than you know yourself? Tears prickle in your eyes and threaten to fall onto your upturned lips when you admire the heart, because he remembered you preferred silver jewelry over gold.  This present...it seems far too intimate to be exchanged between friends, but you quickly shake away that thought. Anyways, he always treats you with the utmost respect and dedication, so why should this be any different?

“Bucky really wanted to give it to you in person,” Steve reassures you quietly with a hand on your knee. "But if he couldn't be here he still wanted you to open it today."

You nod. Taking care not to have the clasp stuck in your sweater fabric, you put on the necklace as the hustle and bustle of the exchange continues. Its weight is comforting.  Somehow, having the cool chain on your skin also gifts you the knowledge that Bucky is here for the holidays in spirit, and you feel yourself getting excited at the prospect of seeing him again to thank him, whenever that may be.

It takes a moment before you realize you can thank him now.  Grabbing your phone, you search to find Bucky's name in the FaceTime app. You're a second away from pressing the call button when the door swings open.

In steps a very windswept Bucky, still in his gear and a duffel bag in one hand.

"Hi," Bucky says. "Am I late?"

And the whole room goes silent.

Maybe everyone is still talking, calling out seasons greetings. Maybe they really did stop. You don't know, since all you hear is the slow click of your shoes as you get up and make your way across the room and over to him.  The lights in the doorway have him stand out from the now-blurry background and make him the only real thing you can see.  

Bucky's arms open with a relieved smile, his bright eyes trained on yours the whole way. In them there's a new look when he notices that you're wearing his necklace, something like pure, unbridled adoration. It's this look that makes you ignore his hug and gently touch his biceps, chest, neck, before pulling him down to meet your lips.

Bucky groans and immediately drops the bag. His hands are warm as they find your hips, tugging you impossibly closer while you cradle his face in your hands. He is kissing you back, soft but insistent, and you are dizzy. Your fingers randomly tug at the ends of his hair since your brain can't think straight, and warmth consumes your chest when the kiss is deepened and you both sigh like you've been waiting a lifetime for this.

Nothing in this universe can ever feel as good as his slightly chapped lips do overlapping on yours, because every movement makes your heart soar.  You don't ever want to stop.  You want to keep kissing him for the rest of your life.

When you finally pull back, not even trying to control your goofy grin as you catch your breath, his cheeks are so flushed and he looks as dazed as you feel. A tiny part of your brain registers the cheers coming from the other people in the room. You don't pay them any mind, for your forehead is still on Bucky's, and he's beaming at you.

“Bucky....” He must be giving the breath of life to your lungs, because you've never felt this alive.  “Thank you.”

He wraps his arms tight around your waist so you can't move away from him. Not that you want to. "For what, doll?"  

"For the necklace and being here."

"I wouldn't miss this for anything. Especially now that I get to kiss you whenever I want." And he does, again, to more whoops from the audience.

There are a few more small kisses before Bucky finally lets you go to change into something more comfortable.  He returns in a nice grey sweater and jeans, and the celebrations can continue with the entire team together.

Steve gets to him first. "Happy holidays, Buck. Welcome home. "

"Yeah, you too. Thanks, Stevie." They hug, clapping each other solidly on the back before joining you on the couches. He winks at you.  "It's good to be home."

You kiss his cheek and he snuggles an arm comfortably around your side.  You can't help but think about how right he is.

Bucky on your left. Your friends on your right.

Feels like home.

Tag List (open!):  @parkerstcr ,  @buckys-fossil , @fxckmebuck , @langinator , @seeyainanotherlifebrotha , @secondstartotheright-imagines , @the-renaissance , @miraisnotavailable , @winchesterandpie  , @whyisbuckyso  , @supernatural-girl97  , @aekr ,  @bootypoppinbarnes , @sebashtiansatan ,  @engineeringgirlcve  , @sanjariti , @rotisserierogers , @feelmyroarrrr

#bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes oneshot #bucky barnes drabble #bucky barnes holiday fic #holiday fic #mcu one shot #mcu fanfiction #writers on tumblr #my writing #thewinterswimmer #come home soon

[green-eyeddragonfanfiction]

Running from the Past: Epilogue

(NSFW, 18+ Version)

Summary: Female!Reader is a mutant who was experimented on by HYDRA. Due to her unique powers, she escaped a year and a half ago without being seen when the Avengers attacked the Hydra compound she was kept in for 5 years of her life. Her mutations and Hydra experiments allow her to blend in with her surroundings (like a chameleon/cuttlefish/octopus) and change her appearance in minor ways (such as hair, skin, and eye color), though the changes are only temporary. Some time has passed since she and Bucky reconciled and she’s regained all of her memories as the infiltrator and most of her life before Hydra meddling. Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader Warnings: Language, violence/fighting, traumatic past, torture/experimentation, angst, slow burn, FLUFF, smut 18+ Word Count: 4,411 A/N: Alright, friends. I hope you enjoyed the ride. This is the NSFW, 18+ version. I ask that if you’re under 18 you read this version. Sorry for the delay, I’ve been painting my friend’s birthday gift. It’s kept me quite busy. (Y/Full/N) = your full name A VERY HAPPY 35TH BIRTHDAY TO SEBASTIAN STAN (August 13th, 1982)

Masterlist // Previous Chapter

One month after the events of Chapter 12

“Cloaking tech working well, then?” you asked, leaning against the doorway to the gym, watching Bucky and Steve spar.

They paused their practice, both smiling when they saw you. You noticed that most of the women and some of the men in the room had been watching the pair go at it with rapt attention. You couldn’t blame them. At some point they had deemed it necessary to take their shirts off. You were surprised Steve’s modesty allowed for it.

“Workin’ great,” Bucky said, beaming at you. Tony had come by earlier that day to outfit Bucky with tech that would cloak his cybernetic arm. It was an enormous show of good faith after the events following the Sokovia accords. You’d missed it, though- you’d had an important mission across the country. Now, to the naked eye, Bucky appeared to have two completely normal, fleshy human arms. “We were just stress testing it. Wanted to see if it could hold out against a pummeling,” he explained to you.

“Are you sure you two don’t just like to beat the crap out of each other?” you asked, smirking at them.

They exchanged a quick glance. “Well I suppose there is also that,” Bucky said, punching Steve in the arm, shit-eating grin plastered on his face.

Steve punched him back good-naturedly. “All in good fun, though, of course,” he said, smiling at you.

“Your definition of fun scares me, Stevie,” you said, chuckling at their antics. He ducked his head sheepishly which only made you laugh harder. After a moment, you sobered. “Can you turn it off?” you asked Bucky, biting your lip nervously.

He gave you a knowing smirk. Without doing anything you could see, the tech flickered off and you could once again see the metal arm underneath. “Of course,” he said, eyes darkening at the look on your face.

“Alright, so, I’m gonna go now,” Steve said awkwardly, reading the sexual tension between you. He walked away, shaking his head, and smiled. You made his best friend happy, which is what mattered most to him.

“See ya,” you both said distractedly to him. Bucky sauntered over and pulled you into his arms, placing a tender kiss on your forehead.

“Welcome back, (Y/N). Things go well?” he asked, pulling back enough for you to look up into his eyes.

“Of course,” you said, smiling. You looked him up and down, admiring him. He was truly a work of art, your Bucky. Cybernetics and scars included.

“See something you like, Doll?” he asked, smirking down at you.

“Ah, damn. Did the obvious staring give it away?” you asked, laughing.

“Something like that,” he said as he leaned down to kiss you. It was hot and rough, his adrenaline still going from his spar with Steve. Heat pooled between your legs and you kissed back hungrily. You’d missed him. It’d been a week since you saw him last.

Without warning he lifted you up and tossed you over his left shoulder, metal arm keeping you secured by holding onto you behind your knees, and walked out of the gym.

“Bucky, what-” you began indignantly, but he silenced you with a quick slap to your rear with his free hand. You hissed. The sting felt good. You were facing the wrong way, but you could tell you were headed back towards your shared room.

“I can walk, you know,” you said, rolling your eyes. Your lip earned you another swift slap to the ass. You gasped softly, heat creeping up your neck and intensifying between your legs.

He nearly ran to your room. You waved bashfully to people you passed. The sight of you thrown over Bucky’s shoulder earned a wolf whistle from Sam. You flipped him off and stuck your tongue out at him. Bucky turned the corner before Sam could escalate the interaction. You tapped his back in mock impatience, pretending to check a watch for good measure. He threw you a dirty but sultry look over his shoulder. You pantomimed zipping your lips shut and shrugged helplessly.

“You’re ridiculous,” he growled, slapping you hard on your ass once more. You gasped a little too loudly at the mingled pain and pleasure. You’d probably have bruises tomorrow.

Finally, he turned to the door of your shared room and punched in the combination. He marched into the room. You had just watched the door click closed before the world spun. When it righted itself, you were laying face up on the bed. You glimpsed the ceiling for only a moment before Bucky filled your view.

“I missed you,” he said huskily, crawling on top of you, legs between yours.

“I missed you, too,” you whispered. He leaned down and crushed his lips against yours, kissing you greedily. His metal hand slipped under your shirt. The cold metal against your skin made you shiver. You moaned, but it was swallowed by the kiss.

He broke the kiss long enough to smirk down at you and whisper, “I love the noises you make, Doll.”

Then he went back to kissing you. He licked your bottom lip in asking and you opened your mouth, allowing him entrance. Your tongues danced together, breathing growing heavier as you both got more excited by each other’s touch. He pressed himself against you, thigh parting your legs as he ground his leg against your core, causing you to moan lewdly into the kiss. His hand snuck under your bra and rolled one of your hard buds between his fingers, causing your back to arch in surprise and pleasure. He let out a low groan when you ground against the erection straining his pants.

His lips left yours to trail hot kisses down your neck, nipping and licking as he went. He bit the junction between your neck and shoulder particularly hard, making you gasp, before he soothed it with a lick. When he got to the hem of your shirt he growled his displeasure. He lifted you up enough to yank your shirt off of you and throw it over his head. After a brief moment it was followed by your bra, his deft hands working to quickly free you of its confines. Before your lust-hazed brain could catch up, his kisses trailed down to your breasts. He licked around one of your nipples, flicking and teasing the other with his hand. He popped a nipple into his mouth, tongue grazing over the bud tantalizingly before he bit down gently.

“Oh, god, Bucky-” you moaned, tangling your fingers into his hair. You gave a sharp tug and he groaned into your chest. He gave one torturous, slow grind of his hips against your core. You could easily feel him through his pants. “Bucky, please,” you moaned, hands moving to his back, nails digging into the broad expanse. He hissed in pleasure and moved his free hand down between the two of you. Your stomach coiled in anticipation. A second later, his fingers slipped experimentally over your shorts, caressing your folds through the fabric. You bucked up into his hand, searching for friction. He smirked and, with a wet pop, released your nipple from his mouth. He kissed your neck and jaw before claiming your lips with his. As he moved, he found your clit with his fingers and massaged the sensitive bud gently, causing you to moan lewdly into the kiss.

“Please what?” he asked, pulling back from the kiss. His voice was husky and his eyes were dark with lust. His finger danced expertly on your clit, causing you to buck against him, body needing more.

“I need you. Please,” you whined, sitting up to plant needy kisses on his neck and lips.

“Be more specific. I want to hear you say it, (Y/N),” he breathed, breath tickling your ear, causing you to shiver.

“Please, Bucky, I want you to fuck me with your mouth and fingers,” you pleaded, too turned on by the man you loved to even consider being ashamed of your begging.

Without another word, Bucky moved back on the bed, quickly pulling off your shorts and underwear. They got tossed to the wayside as Bucky admired the view laid out before him. He ran a single finger up your slit, making you shiver and whimper. He leaned down, planting light kisses up your inner thigh. The occasional nip made you gasp, and you could feel his smirk on your skin. His stubble only added to the sensations. He took a moment to admire your soaking pussy. “So wet for me, Doll,” he whispered reverently. His hot breath on your sex gave you goosebumps. He licked one long stripe up your folds and your hips bucked involuntarily when his tongue grazed over your clit. He wrapped an arm around your leg, keeping you in place as his tongue began to dance in your folds.

Needing more friction, you tangled your fingers into his hair and pulled him closer, silently begging for more. He obliged, tongue spearing into your depths. “Oh, fuck, Bucky. Yes,” you moaned, fingernails scratching his scalp, which earned a low groan from him. Wordlessly, he switched a metal finger with his tongue, moving his tongue up to lick gentle circles around your clit. He pumped his finger in and out of you slowly, admiring how you writhed under his ministrations. He knew how much being touched and fucked by his metal arm turned you on. He added another finger and began sucking lightly on your clit. You moaned loudly, fingers clenching in his hair. Heat coiled low in your belly- you were getting close. His fingers curled up inside of you, stroking your g-spot slowly, and it was all you could do to keep yourself from coming undone then and there. “Bucky, I’m- I’m gonna-” you whimpered. He must have sensed it, because he pulled his fingers out before you even finished saying his name, mouth almost reluctantly leaving your clit behind as he trailed kisses up your body.

He quickly stripped his pants and boxers off, letting you drink in the sight of him standing at attention. You licked your lips hungrily as you watched him move over you, his thick cock rock hard, swaying between his legs. He leaned down, kisses trailing from your cheek to your ear, and whispered “What do you want, Doll?” He bit your earlobe, pain and pleasure spiking through your system.

“You, Bucky. I want you to fuck me with your cock.” As you finished the words, his lips were on yours, muffling your cries as he carefully lined himself up with your entrance and thrust forward, slowly burying himself inside you.

You both groaned as he bottomed out inside of you. He was still for a moment, letting you adjust to his size, before he pulled nearly all the way out and thrust back in again. The brief pause between him working you with his mouth and now had been enough to bring you off the edge, but you were fast approaching it again. After a few experimental thrusts, he set a steady pace. You pulled him down and kissed him deeply, both of you moaning into the kiss. He hooked an arm under one of your legs, pulling it up, allowing him to thrust deeper into you. You moaned loudly; the new angle let him penetrate you deeper than before. But it still wasn’t enough. You wrapped your other leg around his back, pulling him closer while you angled yourself up. He found your sweet spot, ramming into it with every thrust.

“Fuck, Bucky. That’s it. I’m so close- fuck,” you moaned out. His pace increased, his own orgasm closing in.

“Me, too. Come for me, (Y/N),” he groaned into your ear. His free hand reached between you and rubbed circles into your clit, sending you over the edge.

“James, I’m- oh fuck, I’m coming,” Your walls clenched around him as you screamed your orgasm, calling his name, unable to form proper sentences. Between your pussy clenching around his throbbing cock and the use of his real name, Bucky couldn’t hold out any longer. His hips stuttered, pace growing erratic as his own orgasm overtook him. He buried his head in your neck as you rode out the throes of your orgasm on the waves of his. His hips slammed hard against you, burying himself inside of you until, at last, he came deep inside of you, coating your walls with his release. He groaned, collapsing after a moment.

“Hell, Doll, you’re gonna be the death of me,” he mumbled, smiling into your skin. You simply smiled and ran your fingers through his hair, other hand absentmindedly tracing the scarring along his cybernetic arm. After a moment he pulled out, both of you gasping slightly, mourning the loss of him inside of you.

“You’re amazing, Bucky,” you said, placing a kiss on his forehead. He smiled almost shyly at the compliment before kissing you sweetly on the lips.

“So are you, (Y/N),” he said as he cupped your face and ran a thumb along your cheek. He smiled down at you before kissing you once more on the lips. “Now, let’s go get you cleaned up.”

Some time later (months)

According to the clock on the bedside table, it was 3:14 in the morning when the door to your and Bucky’s room opened, Bucky stumbling inside.

“Hey, babe, how did the mission go?” you asked, sleep making your voice deep and hoarse. He didn’t respond, so you were immediately concerned. “Bucky?” you asked, a little more alert. You sat up against the headboard, looking at him in the gloom as he approached. He didn’t respond again, instead crawling into bed next to you. He rested his head on your chest and you wrapped your arms around his shoulders, holding him close. You placed a kiss on his head as he pulled you into a tight hug. “Is everyone okay?” you asked. A tight nod. Good, so no one was hurt. The mission seemed to have gone south, though. “Do you wanna talk about it?” you asked quietly.

He shook his head. “Tomorrow,” he said softly, planting a kiss on your neck. It must have been bad if he wasn’t even willing to talk about it yet. He usually liked to talk the missions out with you if they went south.

“Alright, sweetheart. Get some rest,” you said, scooting the both of you down so you wouldn’t have to sleep sitting up.

“Mm, yeah. Love you,” he said sleepily, already drifting off in the safety of your arms.

You smiled down at him. “Love you, too,” you whispered, kissing him between his brows. You watched him and half dozed while you waited. If it was as bad as you thought, then-

Sure enough, the door to your room opened again a short time later. You glanced over your shoulder at Steve who was standing in the doorway, looking a little unsure.

“Come on in, Stevie,” you said just loud enough for him to hear you. Bucky stirred beside you, but didn’t wake. Steve’s shoulders relaxed a little in relief as he entered the room. He walked over to the bed, taking off his shoes as he went. He was already in his pajamas. With a little difficulty, you pulled an arm out of Bucky’s vice-like grip on you. You laid on your back and pulled the blankets up on the other side of you. “Hurry up, then. I’m letting all the heat out,” you said, smiling up at him.

He returned the smile sheepishly and crawled into the bed beside you. “Thanks,” he said cuddling up next to you, mirroring Bucky’s position by resting his head on your shoulder. “You were expecting me, huh?” he asked, blue eyes bright in the darkness.

You nodded. “Bucky’s attitude gave it away. Figured I’d see you in here sooner rather than later,” you whispered, reaching over to pet his hair. He closed his eyes against the touch, throwing his arms over you and Bucky both.

You didn’t know when this particular arrangement came to be. It had just happened one day after an extremely brutal mission went awry. Steve hadn’t wanted to be alone, so you all passed out on your and Bucky’s huge mattress together. Since then, whenever they went on a particularly bad mission, you’d find yourself with an extra Steve in your bed at night.

“Sorry for intruding,” Steve said quietly.

“It’s no trouble at all, Stevie,” you said, smiling at him.

“That depends on if he keeps talkin’ all night or not,” came Bucky’s groggy and slightly miffed voice from your other side.

“The lady said it wasn’t any trouble, jerk,” said Steve wearily, his light-hearted, joking tone falling flat due to exhaustion.

“Get your own girl to cuddle with, punk,” Bucky said, pulling you closer to himself.

“Both of you go to sleep right now before I make you regret it,” you said, giving the both of them light smacks against their heads.

“Yes, ma’am,” they said in unison. You smiled at them both absentmindedly, rubbing circles into their shoulders with your thumbs. Before long their breathing evened out, and it was only a few more minutes before you followed them into blissful sleep.

Some time later (months)

You paced the bathroom in Wanda’s room, mind going a thousand directions at once. When was the last time you took it? How could you forget? Between missions and training, you supposed it wasn’t that surprising that you’d forgotten somewhere along the line. But then you realized one day that you hadn’t had your period in a while. The longer you thought about it, the longer you’d realized it had been. You’d gone discreetly out to the closest town from the base, picking up a few boxes of pregnancy tests. Wanda had caught you coming back and sensed your trepidation before you’d even said hello and immediately asked you what was wrong. You spilled everything to the woman, and she immediately whisked you away to her room.

“Everything alright in there?” she asked through the door, worry lacing her tone.

“That depends on your definition of okay,” you said, stopping your pacing to stare down at the test on the sink. A single, accusatory line stared up at you and you renewed your frantic pacing. Two other tests with the same result laid in the trash can already.

“Are you decent?” Wanda asked through the door.

“Yeah, why-”

She bursts through the door, eyes immediately latching onto the test on the sink. “So?” she asked, looking expectantly from you to the test.

You weren’t sure if you wanted to say the words out loud. Saying them out loud would make them all the more real. After a moment you huffed out a sigh. “Positive,” was all you said.

Wanda squealed, pulling you into a huge hug. “Do you have any idea how far along?” she asked, pulling away to look at your stomach.

You felt heat creep into your cheeks. “I think maybe two months? But I can’t be sure...” you said, thinking back once again on when the last time your period was. “I suppose that explains why I thought I had the flu, but didn’t have any of the other symptoms... God, I’m dense sometimes,” you said, grumbling at your own obliviousness.

Wanda looked at you seriously. “You have to tell Bucky... assuming it’s his, that is. I am assuming it is,” she said, almost asking you to confirm.

“Of course it’s his, Wanda,” you said, rolling your eyes. She beamed at you.

“Alright then, you have things to do! Namely, telling your boyfriend you’re pregnant with his kid!” she said much too happily as she shoved the test into your hand and practically threw you out the door.

You spun to yell at her, but the door shut in your face before you could get a word in.

“So much for solidarity between sisters. Didn’t even give me any advice on how to say it,” you grumbled loudly and angrily at the door.

“Say what?” asked a voice behind you.

You spun, hiding the test behind your back.

“Bucky,” you said, eyes widening. “Uh, fancy meeting you here.”

“Well, I do live three doors down. With you,” he said, eyeing you suspiciously. “What’s up, Doll?” he asked, reading the tension rolling off of you like he would read a book.

“Nothing,” you said a little too quickly. He raised an eyebrow at you.

“Nothing?” he asked, disbelief clear in his tone.

“Yup, nothing,” you said, cursing Wanda for throwing you out and Bucky for his timing; you’d had no time to prepare at all.

He sighed heavily, eyes searching yours. “Look, Doll, if you don’t want to tell me, I won’t pry it out of you. When you want to talk about whatever’s making you act like a paranoid squirrel on coffee, I’ll be there for you,” he said kindly, leaning forward to place a kiss on your forehead before turning to walk towards your room.

All at once you made up your mind. You sprinted forwards, grabbed his hand, and dragged him into your room.

“What’s that?” he asked, spotting the test in your hand as you punched in the code to your door.

Without responding, you flung him inside, running in after him and slamming the door behind you.

He turned and looked at you, confusion and concern lining his face. Wordlessly, you held out the test to him. He raised an eyebrow at you as he took it from your outstretched hand. He looked down at it, brows furrowing deeper each time you saw his eyes flick from “pregnant” and “not pregnant” to the little indicator that clearly indicated you were in fact, pregnant.

“This... is yours?” he asked dumbly, still staring at the test, brain struggling to process the information.

“Yes,” you breathed. This was the moment of truth.

“I’m reading this right? You’re pregnant?” he asked, finally looking up at you.

You nodded, tension mounting, barely daring to breathe. “Yes. It’s yours,” you said, needlessly specifying, wanting him to know for sure he’s the father. You hadn’t been with anyone but him in years.

“How long?” he asked, glancing between you and the test, feelings unreadable.

“I think about two months,” you said, voice almost apologetic. “I didn’t know until today,” you said quickly, motioning to the test. “About fifteen minutes ago, in fact.” You studied him closely, trying to get a read on what he was thinking.

Without warning, his legs seemed to give out. He landed on his butt on the floor with a thud, sitting up and staring at the test in his hands, then at you. You rushed over to him, kneeling down next to him.

“Bucky?” you asked, unsure.

“I’m gonna be a dad?” he asked, eyes wide with wonder, searching yours.

Tears sprung up in your eyes- stupid hormones- and you nodded your head vigorously.

In the space of a heartbeat, he pulled you into his arms, crushing you against his chest, test forgotten on the floor.

“You’re not... upset?” you asked, voice muffled against his chest.

“No, Doll! Never! I’m ecstatic,” he whispered, peppering your hair and face with kisses. His enthusiasm had you smiling, hugging him close. When he released you, you noticed a couple tears had escaped his eyes. The sight nearly sent you into tears again.

“Damn hormones,” you said, blinking them back as best you could. He chuckled, kissing you softly on the lips.

“I love you,” he said, cupping your face in his metal hand.

You smiled at him. The moment was perfect- everything you’d hoped it would be. He wasn’t only accepting of the situation, he was happy. He’d long since gotten past the insecurities of his past as the Winter Soldier around you- he’d learned early on that blaming himself for the actions he committed while brainwashed wouldn’t be tolerated with you. Still, you’d thought that something as delicate as this might bring up those old bad habits. Raising a baby and being an Avenger as well as a wanted man didn’t go hand in hand. However, he made no notion that he was worried about that. His confidence boosted yours.

“I love you, too,” you said happily, kissing him softly on the lips. He smiled into the kiss and ran his fingers through your hair before breaking it.

“Look, this was supposed to be a surprise-” he said, seeming almost... embarrassed? “-and it was gonna be a huge thing. The whole team was in on it- but now seems like the right time, and-” he dug around in his pockets for something. You quirked an eyebrow at him questioningly. “-deep down I’m just a boy from Brooklyn in an era long past, but some of those values have weight-” you leaned back now, giving him more room to search as you stared at him in confusion. What on earth was he talking about?

At last he seemed to find what he was looking for. He pulled it out with an “Aha!” and you swore you stopped breathing. It was a tiny black velvet box.

His eyes locked onto yours. His expression to open and vulnerable and earnest it made your heart ache. He opened the tiny box, revealing a simple yet beautiful diamond ring. “(Y/Full/N), would you do me the honor of becoming my wife?” he asked, love for you clear in his voice.

It was your turn to be struck dumb. You didn’t know how long it took for your brain to catch up, but before you knew it you’d thrown yourself at him, both of you tumbling backwards on the floor.

“Yes,” you said breathlessly.

“Yes?” he asked, almost as if he didn’t believe his ears.

“Yes, Bucky! Yes yes yes!” you said, each yes punctuated by a frenzied kiss to the lips. “Yes, I’ll marry you,” you said, grinning broadly down at him.

It was like his time as the Soldier never happened. It was like James Buchanan Barnes had never gone to war. He looked like the kid from Brooklyn again. His face was bright- brighter than you’d ever seen it.

“I love you,” he said, smiling up at you. He slid the delicate ring onto your finger.

You smiled at it then leaned down to kiss him tenderly. “I love you too.”

The End

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#Bucky x Reader #bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #winter soldier #Winter Soldier x Reader #marvel fanfiction #steve rogers #captain america #wanda maximoff #sam wilson

[urscottsdale]

1-100 😌

1:when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk? i rarely eat cereal but i think i usually balance them pretty equally or try to lol

2:do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a wintery day? i love it as long as im all bundled up

3:what random objects do you use to bookmark your books? usually the closest piece of paper i can find

4:how do you take your coffee/tea? with lots of sugar 😏

5:are you self-conscious of your smile? very

6:do you keep plants? nope

7:do you name your plants? nada

8:what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings? writing and music

9:do you like singing/humming to yourself? sometimes

10:do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach? all of the above

11:what’s an inner joke you have with your friends? no friends, no jokes other than maybe im the quiet one

12:what’s your favorite planet? pluto

13:what’s something that made you smile today? my dog

14:if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like? my room: messy, theirs: clean

15:go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is! uranus is tilted on its side 😉

16:what’s your favorite pasta dish? spaghetti

17:what color do you really want to dye your hair? blue

18:tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up. idk tbh

19:do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it? i dont

20:what’s your favorite eye color? brown eyes 😍

21:talk about your favorite bag, the one that’s been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces. who comes up with these questions? bc i dont have a favorite bag

22:are you a morning person? no i hate mornings

23:what’s your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations? listen to music

24:is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets? theres a couple, one doesnt know it tho

25:what’s the weirdest place you’ve ever broken into? never broken into anywhere lol

26:what are the shoes you’ve had for forever and wear with every single outfit? vanz

27:what’s your favorite bubblegum flavor? mint

28:sunrise or sunset? sunset

29:what’s something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing? randomly checking up on me and actually meaning it when they say they care

30:think of it: have you ever been truly scared? a handful of times yes

31:what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks. love socks and wearing them, dont sleep in them and i have an assortment of colors bc white is boring

32:tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends. there was this time i went out drinking with my friend after graduation, these two guys were hitting on her after she called them gay (even bought us drinks), my friend is gay so that was interesting lol

33:what’s your fave pastry? doughnuts

34:tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it? winnie the pooh and hell yes i still have it

35:do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often? love them but never use them

36:which band’s sound would fit your mood right now? backstreet boys

37:do you like keeping your room messy or clean? i like keeping it clean but it tends to stay messy lol

38:tell us about your pet peeves! i have too many pet peeves tbh

39:what color do you wear the most? blue and maroon (not together tho)

40:think of a piece of jewelry you own: what’s it’s story? does it have any meaning to you? cross necklace is self-explanatory, dog tag necklace i got from my parents so it holds a special meaning to me

41:what’s the last book you remember really, really loving? to kill a mockingbird

42:do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it! starbucks…

43:who was the last person you gazed at the stars with? lol one of my friends back in like 5th grade

44:when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything? summer and winter breaks in high school

45:do you trust your instincts a lot? yup

46:tell us the worst pun you can think of. sex while camping is fucking in tents ;)

47:what food do you think should be banned from the universe? most kinds of fish

48:what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today? being alone, and yes actually

49:do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought? yes but i cant remember tbh. most i have were gifted to me.

50:what’s an odd thing you collect? keys

51:think of a person. what song do you associate with them? @thisvanessa - count on me by bruno mars

52:what are your favorite memes of the year so far? im pretty sure ive never seen a meme i didnt love so. the spongebob one is pretty good tho.

53:have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them? i wish i could tell u

54:who’s the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face? my dog lol

55:what’s the most dramatic thing you’ve ever done to prove a point? idk im pretty passive aggressive so i do a lot lol

56:what are some things you find endearing in people? same as earlier, randomly checking up on me and also saying they miss me

57:go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics? nope

58:who’s the wine mom and who’s the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why? my ex friend is the wine mom and idk maybe im the vodka aunt lol

59:what’s your favorite myth? the earth is flat

60:do you like poetry? what are some of your faves? yess langston hughes and edgar allan poe

61:what’s the stupidest gift you’ve ever given? the stupidest one you’ve ever received? cant think of any tbh, maybe the dancing chicken that used to be passed around for years in my family

62:do you drink juice in the morning? which kind? orange juice and cran-grape juice

63:are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be? i just leave them be

64:what color is the sky where you are right now? gray

65:is there anyone you haven’t seen in a long time who you’d love to hang out with? yes

66:what would your ideal flower crown look like? idk not big on flower crowns

67:how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel? i love them so much

68:what’s winter like where you live? hot with a random cold day here and there

69:what are your favorite board games? wahoo/marbles, sorry, candyland, pretty much all of them lol

70:have you ever used a ouija board? nope

71:what’s your favorite kind of tea? sweet tea

72:are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you’ll forget it? yes but im also too lazy to note things so i end up forgetting a lot

73:what are some of your worst habits? procrastination

74:describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns. beautiful, bubbly, cute, always smiling even tho i know they r sad deep down

75:tell us about your pets! small, black fur ball full of energy

76:is there anything you should be doing right now but aren’t? so many things

77:pink or yellow lemonade? pink

78:are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub? neither im a minion dc club

79:what’s one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you? idk told me i give them butterflies or get nervous when talking to me

80:what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why? i think they r an off white an bc my apartment landlord wont let me change them lol

81:describe one of your friend’s eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of. dark pools of chocolate

82:are/were you good in school? i was alright could of been better if i wasnt so lazy

83:what’s some of your favorite album art? never thought about that maybe something justin bieber has done

84:are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones? i want to but im not sure tbh

85:do you read comics? what are your faves? nope

86:do you like concept albums? which ones? yes theres a lot

87:what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives? high school musical

88:are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy? yes

89:are you close to your parents? yes

90:talk about your one of you favorite cities. im pretty sure i could never get tired of nyc

91:where do you plan on traveling this year? i successfully did not travel anywhere this year, thank you bank account ur the best

92:are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch? drown it in cheese

93:what’s the hairstyle you wear the most? short hair, short on the sides and longer on top

94:who was the last person you know to have a birthday? me

95:what are your plans for this weekend? lazy days

96:do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot? procrastination is my middle name

97:myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house? INFP, scorpio and hufflepuff

98:when’s the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it? i dont think ive ever been hiking but i want to

99:list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them. over and over again by tim mcgraw, make you miss me by sam hunt, remember when by alan jackson, unhinged by nick jonas, chainsaw by nick jonas, untitled by simple plan and welcome to my life by simple plan

100:if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why? damn thats a really hard one. probably the future tbh.

#thisvanessa #answered

[mysmolchildrendeservehappiness]

they say you’re gonna tear me apart (but darling you’re the one holding me together)

They’d been having a good time. The bar, apparently owned by Thor’s younger brother -Loki-, was a hole-in-the-wall establishment with a good combination of vintage and sleek decorations. It made it feel somewhat homey but with an underlying sense of darkness. 

And even though the clientele seemed shady at best and straight-up murderous at worst, Thor assured them that this was a ‘free-conflict’ space, and should something occur his brother would take care of it, which should not be as reassuring as it was, but well, the guy had something about him that warned you not to fuck with him, or he would find no trouble electing a river to throw your corpse into.

Bucky found it reassuring in an odd way. Like finding a kindred spirit. 

So here they were celebrating nothing in particular, just their weekly going out night -it was Thor’s turn to choose-, and Sam had invited Rhodey, since they’d been going steady for 3 months and he’d grown tired of hearing Stevie nag him about meeting his fella, who’d in turn invited his best friend Tony; he was a snarky little shit who thrilled on making Steve blush and couldn’t go more than a minute without sneaking a pop-culture reference in. Bucky loved him from the get go. Steve, well Steve resisted for about 3 minutes until he caved under Tony’s caramel orbs and overenthusiastic stories about his bots, with plenty hand gestures emphasizing his points "no, I’m telling you it was a small fire, but there goes Dum-E dousing me with foam and extinguishing my experiments" “you were on fire Tony” “a small one!“ , and started in on his mother-hening routine.

The kids’ wide eyed look would’ve been funny as hell, had he not been dealing with the same since back when they were kids and the blonde was as thin as a rail, but even Steve going through puberty and gaining what seemed to be double his weight in muscles hadn’t managed to save Bucky from his friends well-meaning nurturing, so with a swig of his beer he wished luck on the brunette. 

It all seemed to be going well, Rhodey (he wasn’t going to call him James) was a great guy and he looked at Sam like he hung the stars, so the group gave his non-verbal approval and continued to have a good time.

Tony had just finished talking on the phone with his boyfriend Peter-who Tony said was going to pick him up from the bar since it was getting late and he hadn’t brought his car- when he stood up and made his way to the bar in order to talk with Loki, and hadn't that been a surprise, the kid was apparently a regular, and for all that he looked about 17 in a sea of late 20’s to 30 year olds he fit in surprisingly well. 

The only reason Bucky saw the guy going up to Tony was because he’d been keeping an eye on the blokes table, -they’d been taking too long looks at Natasha and Tony apparently-, the guy slid in next to Tony interrupting whatever conversation he was having and ordered a drink from a blank looking Loki, who proceeded to make the drink with forced coolness.

After receiving his drink the fellow lifted a brow at Loki in an attempt to make him leave, it only earned him two dangerously raised brows in return, which made him back off hurriedly and instead concentrate all his advances on poor Tony. 

The guy proceeded to invade Tony’s personal space causing him to lean back so fast he almost fell off the stool, leading the other guy to grab him by the waist in order to steady him. And not taking his hands off when he was finished.

Bucky could tell that the brunette was uncomfortable with the attention, if his subtle and then non-subtle attempts at getting the guy to let go of him were any clue, but the other seemed to be ignoring any hints thrown his way and instead appeared to be taking a firmer hold on the smaller man’s waist. 

Loki had gone off to the backroom minutes before hissing in some foreign language to whoever was on the other side of the phone, but the whole bar seemed to be keeping an eye on the situation, already he had seen a tall man, with what looked like a pair of katanas on the seat next to him stand up and make his way to the pair.

He turned to his friends, but no one but Clint and Natasha seemed to have any clue to what was going on.

He nudged Steve with his elbow and when he saw him turn he motioned to where Tony, Katana Guy, a returned Loki and the other dude seemed to be having a confrontation.

The blonde made a sound on the back of his throat which got everyone’s attention, Rhodey almost jumped out of his seat when he saw Tony looking a little disheveled and holding an ice pack from somewhere to his midriff, but Sam managed to hold him back, Steve was a little trickier (all that bulk had to weigh) but he managed with Natasha’s help in the end.

Thor was frowning in their direction, but seemed to be happy to let it be dealt with it "Aye, it’s nothing to worry about my friends, I am sure Loki will take the proper measures to deal with the situation in a satisfying manner”, Nat and Clint appeared to be content observing the situation first. 

The rest of the guys that came with The Groper decided it would be a good time to give their friend some backup, that prompted the other bar denizens to stand up as well and come up behind Tony.

One of them, a guy who had some serious sideburns going on and was holding a cigar with his teeth ruffled the brunettes hair and proceeded to put on some spiked knuckle dusters while a slightly taller guy who bared some resemblence to sideburns guy sent him a wink and evoking a smile before striding to the front of the crowd and letting loose a feral grin, bringing his rather prominent fangs -the fuck- to light. 

 The view gifted by the two crowds pitted against each other would be quite hilarious in any other situiation, considering it was most of the bar against 15 guys on the other side, if it weren’t for the bloodlust rising through the air. One guy had Katanas and fuck me but were those guns!? 

As it were it was gearing up to be a fucking spectacular bar-fight (read:murder-spree) and it all came to head when some big group arrived. A dark skinned woman with green highlights in her hair was at the front of the assembly, followed by a heavily tattooed guy who was built like a shit brick house and a duo on completely different sets of the spectrum when it came to height, with the tallest one approaching 7’ and the shorter one having an uncanny resemblance to a… raccoon of all things. An angry raccoon. 

Bringing the rear was a rather tall, brunette male sporting a beard and wearing a well-worn red leather jacket, who while handsome enough to warrant a second look, caught Bucky’s attention by the way his gaze was searching through the crowd, methodically looking at everyone and then dismissing them, until finally a rather messy head of hair popped out from behind the multitude that was hiding him and the gaze snapped up to him, going through a range of emotions, from giddily overjoyed, to worried when he saw the look on Tony’s face and finally furious at the state the shorter male was in. 

Huh, Bucky thought, that would be Peter then. 

The rest of the mish-mashed people in the group approached Tony and while the giant and the tattooed guy appeared to be comforting him and checking him over for injuries while the short one picked up an argument about car engines, which seemed to lift his spirits a little bit, his boyfriend had a silent conversation with the gruff sideburns man, through facial gestures alone, by the time the exchange was over, Tony’s lover was sporting a truly menacing scowl and was picking through the crowd like a man on a mission with the dark-hued lady following on his trails and exuding a deadly aura that sent chills down his spine. 

In the future, when Bucky remembered this day, he would still tell you that things went from 0 to 100% in less than the blink of an eye. 

One moment he was watching Peter standing tense at the forefront of the crowd blink and next thing you know there was a yell and The Groper was lying on the floor with a broken arm in a gruesome fashion; Natasha was watching avidly as the woman took out three of the guys’ friends in less than 30 seconds; and the tattoed guy jumped into the fray inciting a full scale bar-brawl to take place at the center of the club. 

Tony appeared next to them with “Groot and Rocket, they’re friends of mine”, and took a seat at the table, allowing Rhodey to fuss over his best friend, while rolling his eyes and getting out an amused huff. 

He was looking into the center of the fight where his boyfriend was executing a maneuvre that managed to make him raise his brows and tilt his head, with too much fondness for that much blood. 

He was about to turn to Steve when he saw a flash of blonde hair through the corner of his eye, and lo and behold, his friend was now in the focal point of the scuffle. Gazing at the empty seats around the table it seemed like the only ones that stayed put were Sam, Rhodey, Tony and his friends. He could even hear Thor’s bellows in between all the ruckus. 

Standing with a sigh, he cracked his knuckles. 

Idiots, he thought fondly while throwing his first punch of the night. 

Hey! This is the second MCU fic I’ve started, though it’s the first StarkQuill I’ve done. Though I have SO many self-prompts for this ship, but this one fought it’s way to the top and wouldn’t leave me alone until I wrote it, so here you go guys.

Hope you enjoy it, feedback is appreciated :))

Love ya peeps, xoxo

I’ve also posted it on AO3 

This is the blog I’ll be using to post my fics and art, but I’ll also link my posts to my main side blog which is @creepingsoul

#starkquill #my fic #my writing #mscdh update #avengers au #creepingsoul #tony stark #slash fanfic #tony stark x peter quill #gotg fic #some x-men thrown in there as well #they came outta nowhere #meh #starklord

[blisshealthcollective]

Self Inventory

There is an increasingly palpable sense of urgency that pervades our world right now, an insistence that seems inherent to the times we live in. Keeping up with daily demands alongside ongoing injustice and ignorance: the enormity can feel overwhelming. Being alive in these times asks so much of us, collectively and individually. It often seems that I can never do enough, that we can never do enough. And there is no discernible destination, no resting place, no clear point of arrival. Only a constant insistence that we continue.

These times demand diligence and persistence, an unyielding eye toward justice and an acute level of self-awareness that hasn’t been valued, let alone cultivated, by a culture built from the ground up on distraction and avoidance. The times we are in demand tireless creativity and dedicated attention. But they also require that we take the time to care for ourselves. The story given us by the current paradigm says that our worth is defined by our productivity.

What we have “to show for ourselves” is more important than how we show up. Colonialism gave us white supremacy and institutionalised oppression. It also gifted us the Protestant work ethic, which tells us that our very salvation is wrapped up in the obligation of work.

This is the same mentality that measures the worth of a forest by the board-feet of timber that can be harvested, rather than by the health of the ecosystem, the biodiversity of life that it encompasses, the oxygen and clean water that it allows. It’s the same mentality that measures the worth of a country by gross domestic product, rather than by the health of its people, the vibrancy of its culture, the beauty of its art.

In order to deconstruct this mentality, we engage with the arduous but liberating work of identifying and dismantling it as it shows up in ourselves and our lives. We must refuse to let our worth be defined by what we do, even as there is so much that needs to be done. When approached from this perspective, we can recognise that the very fact of caring for ourselves is in itself a revolutionary act.

In this, we say: I am an ecosystem, not board feet of timber to be sold. In this, we say: I refuse to let my life be mined for profit. I am not a resource; I am not a machine. I am a human animal with a soft and tender and beautiful living body that needs rest and movement and sunlight and laughter. “I am a soulful, emotional, social creature and I refuse to reduce myself to a commodity.”

If we are dedicated to dismantling the pervasive structures that serve so few and take so much, then the very acts we take that nurture our souls are themselves microcosms of a new way of being. In this, we might recognize that how we care for ourselves is how we care for our world. And the ways that we care for ourselves matter. Numbing out, avoidance, and escapism may feel like “self-care” (this is what I often tell myself when I’m on hour five of Netflix or eating yet another chocolate chip cookie) but often serve not to nourish us but to drain us, all the while perpetuating the very systems we seek to dismantle. The times we are in demand much from us. They demand diligence and perseverance, yes. They demand unprecedented courage and relentless compassion. And that courage and compassion begins with each of us learning how to truly care for ourselves. So if you want a revolution...

1. Feel all the feelings. Allow yourself to feel the sadness, anger, grief, and despair evoked by the realities of this moment. These emotions are not only valid responses to the madness in our world, but are themselves evidence of your connectedness with others beyond yourself. Patriarchy and white supremacy culture centralises the individual, tells us that our emotions are a personal pathology that reflects our weakness. Hyper-individualism personalises these emotions as a personal ‘issue’ rather than a healthy response to the injustice, destruction, and ignorance that we face. Tears are medicine.

2. Practice gratitude. In a culture that profits from perpetuating an internalised narrative of ‘not enough,’ gratitude is a revolutionary act. When practiced with intention, it is not a ’silver lining’ panacea, or fodder for toothless complacency. It speaks to what is sufficient and abundant. It allows for a solid foundation from which to act. It also offers a framework to explore the unearned privileges and comforts that you may enjoy—which is work that is deeply necessary right now—without getting mired in the swamps of guilt and shame. In the words of Sam Keen, “the more you become a connoisseur of gratitude, the less you are a victim of resentment, depression, and despair. Gratitude will act as an elixir that will gradually dissolve the hard shell of your ego—your need to possess and control—and transform you into a generous being. The sense of gratitude produces true spiritual alchemy, makes us magnanimous—large-souled.” We need large-souled humans in this time.

3. Practice self-compassion. Be kind to yourself, even as you are allowing yourself to feel the full weight of this moment. Even as you are doing the fierce work of dismantling the systems of privilege and oppression within yourself, and potentially experiencing deeply discomfort in this. (And also, when five hours of Netflix and innumerable chocolate chip cookies happen). Be kind to yourself. Expectations of perfection, self-judgment, and shame are forms of internal violence that we perpetrate on ourselves, and which are a quiet and spectacularly awful form of internalised oppression. They divide us against ourselves, which diminishes our strength and capability. You are a beautiful and flawed human. Offer yourself some grace in this.

4. Connect to your community. Be with your people. Develop and foster your relationships. Surround yourself with loving, compassionate, dedicated humans who are doing the work. Give each other the space and support and encouragement to process everything that is happening right now. Hold one another accountable, and encourage one another to rest. Do not let each other fall into complacency. Prioritise laughter.

5. Develop or maintain your spiritual practice. What we need now more than ever are the teachings of interconnectedness, compassion, and grace. Spirituality can provide a sense of belonging to something greater than yourself that can be a deep well of strength. It provides a foundation upon which to build the world we wish to see, the deep-rooted connection to source that can give us the strength to do that which we think we cannot do. Finding spiritual community serves to doubly reinforce the nourishment and replenishment that this allows.

6. Spend time in nature. There has been a lot of conversation after the election about getting out of our digital "echo-chambers,” places where our pre-existing ideas and beliefs are amplified and reinforced by repetition and agreement, which creates a false version of reality, and which disinvites the diversity of opinion that is actual reality. Most of us, especially those of us who live in cities, live in an echo-chamber of the human species, in which our interactions and experiences are limited to the human world. Being in the natural world is inherently grounding and calming. It can also offer humility. When we decentralise humans from the top of the hierarchy, we have access to the immense wisdom of billions of years of evolutionary learning. If we are to craft truly sustainable societies that foster diversity, we must honour this, and listen.

7. Ingest conscious entertainment. We are creatures of story. There is something deeply human about narrative, and stories have the power to evoke emotion, foster empathy, or inspire action. Stories also have the power to disempower, to perpetuate stereotypes and reinforce oppressive structures. Through the work of many over the preceding decades, it is possible now more than ever to hear the voices of those that have historically been marginalised and silenced. Rather than using movies and TV and novels as a form of mindless escape, we can choose to expose ourselves to stories and perspectives that allow a more encompassing version of what it means to be human. Seek out these voices. Read them. Watch them.

“When we take on a wider lens, we can see how the acts that nourish the deepest parts of ourselves are the very acts that give us the strength, courage, and skills to keep going, even as they are opportunities to practice the very ways of being that we want to bring into the world. Caring for ourselves allows us to care for others from a place of rooted grace, a place of grounded awareness. In this time of great urgency, we must give ourselves permission to slow down.”

Michael.P.Sheehan 

[donniedonkov-blog]

Fans’, Artists’ and Musicians’ reviews! (09.06.2017)

Hey....Your tracks are just great and I believe your music

inspires a lot of people to follow you. I wonder how come I didn't know about you earlier.

Please never give up makin such a great music for us!!! a BIG thank you!!! btw my fav is It's a beautiful day to start over Hey, I personally think that it shows that you are more musically gifted if you can bring us different kinds of music than just playing the same thing tune after tune. I like your music very much because of its diversity and you are not tryin' to repeat yourself or any artist out there. I appreciate the creativity you put into your music style. From a true fan of all your music. Hey I did share your e-newslletter in my newsfeed on facebook and I promise to share it each time you send me your news. I have more than 400 friends on my facebbok, I want them all to know about your music. That's how I will show my support. Dennis Hi!!! Now I'm definitely looking forward to the new songs, UP ON MY TOWER IS A MARVEL. Hi love your music need the album asap I'm listening on No.1 to your music right this second! I LOVE it! I'm going to get it from itunes! Great music. Thanks for continuing to make music so we don't have to listen to Idols music! ROSHEL i wanna let you know that i started my day with IT'S A BEAUTIFUL DAY TO START OVER, your music is always with me! Hi, I like your tunes very much, first time I heard, I want to buy the cd soon Very modern. Up On My Tower. I like it. Up on my tower... my favorite tune of yours! I love your music! You have an amazing talent. Thank you for sharing! hi think I've listened 30 times already.))) gone forever is a very good song. I don't have much money at the moment so i can't buy your album and I wonder if you could send me just one this tune as a gift? I promise to spread the word about you! Well, i like It's a Beautiful Day to Start Over. Thank you for your message and it's really great to be a part of your life! Music connects people worlwide and it's just amazing. LOVE YOUR MUSIC! KEEP IT UP hi!how to buy your album which includes it's a beautiful day to start over on google play?? I've been searching... but could not be found. or maybe you can upload more tunes here, I'm eager to hear more...

Hi!!yyour music is absolutely awesome and reflects my mood for today. i will follow your updates here and spread the word as much as i can..all the best!! While I'm thankful for your music here on numberonemusic I want to pay for the album on itunes you deserve my money. Im gonna search for it right now. cheers! Crank it up! love every song. happy blessed day!! If I got the money I would buy it. It is more than a pleasure to listen to Free Without You daily. Thank you for being there and making such a great music for us! COMING BACK TO YOU sounds soo great! Walk Beside Me this is the best one I heard on N1M so far, don't forget to let me know bout any music updates there!!! Hi! I think this phrase would express how I connect with your music "If I were the boss at major record company, I would definitely sign a deal with you immediately!" alll the best to you and God bless!!! TOP CHEF

your music I play on Repeat repeat repeat your tunes are simplistic. Easy to digest. Radio friendly. I am a huge fan and have been since I discovered you. I will continue to support you and recommend you to friends. I appreciate the hard work you put forth. Free Without You just added to my favs on n1m and followed u, you're awesome! Gone Forever is just unbelievable! hi I just have to say that you create a very good music and it appeals to a lot of people. I'll be listening to you, I've just added your n1m page to my faves. Good Luck Donnie! I can’t stop listening to coming back to you again and again! I’ve heard it like 30 times already! coming back to you is the Best song I heard recently!!! Best of the Best! Donnie, your voice is pure gold! Cyril if i ever see your promo in my list i'll recommend it in first place on my fb page. peace & respect

wow Gr8.. I simply love your music, ever since I found your profile at n1m, when I heard Coming Back To You, I knew I'm going to listen to all the songs u sing, your voice is just so amazing. WOULD LOVE to see YOU LIVE! keep it up Donnie....

Have a great holiday, Donnie! We'll be going into the studio soon to record some "real songs" for a change! Much luck in the future, your friends from EvilTone!

I can listen to your music all day! Great work here!

One word sums up the creativity, style, and music...AMAZING!!!!!! :)

Hi Donnie great somgs, I like your sensitive voice and interpretation very much

Fabulous voice and wonderful songs with great lyrics! Cant wait to visit again!

your music is worth buying it and it's like suddenly nothing else is worth listening to, personally I still like buying the physical copy )) I have just shared your n1m page with all my friends on fb. Sell at least a MILLION!

helloooo there..is there any way to download Around the moon? please let me know, I'd really appreciate this much!

Listened to your superb music on my train trip today . ))) Jules

Hey I must tell you that I am so impressed with your music. Are you going to upload new tunes anytime soon? ��� Minnie Bono

Thank u for the music, very good songs. East17au

Brilliant tune ���� Peter Henry

Thank you, I like it a lot! Aleksey Zarudniy

thank you Donnie , God bless you and your music Jocelyn Zubeldia

Thank you, because magic may not be real.. but your songs are truly magical! Irma Geiger

live the dream play the music of your heart and mind KEEPn it comin KALI-Fonia-EnErgy-Poductions-K.E.E.P.n it comin

Hi, a big thumbs up from me. I'm glad I've found your page on here, I've been enjoying your music for quite some time. I bet you hear this all the time, but I was genuinely amazed when I first heard one of your tunes online.

Nicholas Waagen

I checked it out. Great song and video. Very emotional- i feel it!

Stephen Thomas

Very Nice Grant Maloy Smith

Hi! I just stopped to show my support for your music. Thanks for creating great music that we(fans) want to play over and over.

Mollie

ALWAYS ON TOP <3

Kamran Akbar

hi. i'll admit, i just stumbled upon your music by referall from my friend's post on facebook...I like it! i look forward to listening to the rest of your music.

Megan

Gone forever ，I hope you're in heaven....nice song Donnie Donkov Crazzielovely Anderson

An excellent composition and dramatic production Donnie.                                     (Hope and Disappointment)

Alan Hamilton

Mesmerising performance ! (Up on my Tower)

Halftime Cornet (Mike F)

Great ..... Donnie all my respect and support (Hope and Disappointment)

joan nogueira farrés

I wish you and your loved ones Joy, Happiness and Peace: May the Lord bless your life now and forever!

Parole di Vera Vita

hey i was browsing for some new good music and came across your wonderful sounds! I've just joined your network to recommend your music on my facebook and earn blincoins. Keep in touch!

Gregory

You are amazing! (Hope and Disappointment)

Music Bear

You're awesome!

Literary Titan

HI! FIRST, I REALLY LOVE YOUR MUSIC! SOMETIMES I THINK MUSIC SHOULD COME WITH A WARNING: CAN TAKE OVER BODY & MIND!

Herschel

This is very good! ('Gone Forever' Official Video)

Georgi Angelov (Om Art Formation)

I LIKE IT!!! ('Gone Forever' Official Video)

Степан Щербюк

Thank u for the music!!!

DisneyFan

I'm really sorry Donnie... Take care My Friend! ;( ('For Robbie') (by the way you gotta hear the song to understand this) - Donnie Donkov

Jadwiga Kramarska

I'm proud to know you! You are a great artist and person ('On the Other Side')

Dimitar Andonov, Kapka Dimitrova

Incredible track, awesome video - I'm rockin' right now :) ('All my Love')

Dimitar Andonov, Kapka Dimitrova  

Thank you, Donnie. The song is so cool and the photos are properly arranged! ('All my Love')  

Ivelina Draganova (the girl from the video :) )

This touched my heart ('I Will be Waiting for You')

Max Benton

AWESOME!!! ('Purgatory')

Freddie

nice! you could put it in some type of film! ('Purgatory')

jgidd

Very Cool! ('The Way to the Stars')  

Dimitar Andonov, Kapka Dimitrova  

Great Composition ('Through The Gate and Beyond')

Sam

- what is the name of the theme played at 4:53 ? ('Through The Gate and Beyond')   madruga - This is "The Gate", the first original song which was 3 min long. Donnie Donkov - Nice!   madruga

You know I'm a fan of yours! Every time when I listen to your songs I feel like lying and I'm far away from our gray life! ('The End')

Dimitar Andonov, Kapka Dimitrova

AMAZING!!! ('Around the Moon')

GeorgeG

"You're unique! One of the best musicians., composers, songwriter we have ever known!!! We are so proud of you!", "My extremely talented cousin! So proud to call him my cousin!", "You are something Else!", "All your stuff are so goo I can't believe it", "We're just looking up to you"..... and many more Margarita Lazova (cousin), Bojidar Lazov (cousin), Mariana Lazova (aunt)

#Donnie Donkov Project #donnie donkov dobrin donkov #donnie donkov #dobrin donkov #reviews #fans