#the only way through it is through it

[keets-writing-corner]

Thinking a LOT about Lucifer in the latest Hazbin episode. Idk what I was expecting but not this??

As I was watching my immediate thought was just "huh... Lucifer is kinda of weird..." but as the episode went on I realized the issue

the dude is off the chain depressed, like he says it as a joke but holy cow it is SO BAD

He's manically just creating rubber ducks cuz his daughter really like it that one time but it's empty, it's never good enough but he keeps doing it, maybe cuz he doesn't know how to pass the time otherwise.

like I get the feeling he HAS better things he SHOULD be doing than making rubber duck after rubber duck. At first I was like, "Bruh why isn't the king of hell doing anything?" aaaaand then it became clear...

The dude is disassociating so bad he can barely hold a conversation let alone remember information. He clearly WANTS to, he wants to be involved with his daughter so bad, he wants to care about the things she's doing so bad, but his depression keeps interfering. It's like he can only hear every other word and he grasps onto the ones he does hear semi-out of context. Like you can see every time he catches something that he hadn't before and he just "well shit I didn't catch that part"

and that's why he reacts so weird when people talk to him. He is struggling so bad to engage with the conversation he's only getting 50% of it

does that look like the face of a man who knows what the hell the conversation is even about??? he is STRUGGLING

like Charlie spent so long telling him about the hotel, and he STILL didn't understand what she wanted. Yeah it comes off as ditzy but literally I've been in that position where your brain just "nope, not doing this right now" and nerfs your conversation comprehension. So as someone who's BEEN in that position, to me it feels exactly like what he's dealing with. He's sorta engaged with the conversation, but only as much as his brain will allow

For example, when I'm dealing with this, this is what someone talking to me feels like this where the crossed out parts are what I missed and bold is what I catch, "Hey! You know I was thinking for dinner we could either make some chicken with rice? But if you don't feel like cooking, pasta is super easy and you love that right? What do you want to do?" you can kinda get that someone is trying to talk to you about dinner, and towards the end you get the impression that they asked something that needs your input so you can decently put 2 and 2 together and try and pass off, but crucial bits were left out, I would have no idea that either chicken or pasta is in the conversation only having heard "rice". When someone is just talking at me, I can decently pass off as being engaged but the second I'm required to participate in the conversation I'm screwed. Seem familiar? At which point I have 2 options, try to give a bullshit answer, or admit that I missed what they were saying and ask them to repeat

Lucifer, unfortunately, is trying so damn hard to hide that he's dealing with like 24/7 dissociation, so he can't admit that he's missing entire chunks of the conversation, hence his really weird replies. He does eventually get the full picture and then he and Charlie start having the real conversation

Also, the Alastor/Lucifer rivalry was hilarious but also really indicative of more of what Lucifer is dealing with

Alastor is, unfortunately, really good at picking up people's insecurities, and thanks to Charlie's description earlier and watching Lucifer clearly trying to overcompensate, he immediately picks up on the fact that Lucifer KNOWS he struggles to be a good dad (we know cuz it's cuz of the depression, hard to be engaged when your brain keeps turning off) and decides to rub salt in the wound by pretending he's been acting as a surrogate father to Charlie. Now why Alastor decided to pick a fight with the king of hell is beyond me, I do not understand Alastor (and I LIKE IT) (maybe it's cuz Alastor thinks he's hot shit and was expecting Lucifer to at least have heard of him but Lucifer just treats him like a nobody? who knows)(why would Lucifer listen to radio anyways when he can't even pay attention to a conversation it'd just be white noise)

But yeah I just was expecting someone who oozed either charisma or presence and instead I got a depressed dad who's dissociating so bad he can barely function and be present in his life. The only thing it seems he CAN do is make rubber ducks cuz his daughter really liked it that one time

Idk Lucifer is tragic to me. Whatever the full details of what heavan did to him absolutely broke him and he can't deal with it. He's aware of it, and he doesn't know how to fix it, so he tries to over compensate and sorta makes an ass out of himself but no one says or does anything cuz this guy is supposed to be THE king of hell

Suddenly it's making a lot more sense why he just rolls over and lets heaven do what it wants and even told Charlie to go in his place the start of the show. He's not in any headspace to hold a basic conversation let alone negotiate! He didn't even know who Alastor was, he's been so out of touch

idk I like him, he seems sweet, I hope Charlie brings some light back into his life. He really needs to get out of that rubber duck room

#hazbin spoilers #hazbin hotel #lucifer #lucifer morningstar #analysis #dissociation #look idk what to tell you all #I watched the episode and everything makes so much more sense #when you realize he's only intaking like 50-60% of the conversations #he's not bad at listening his brain is literally preventing him from getting everything #literally I've been there #the difference between him and me tho #is that he can't show it #he's the king of hell #he has to bluff his way through conversations #but yeah literally rewatch the episode with this in mind #and watch him reply to the things he DID catch #anyways #NEW BLORBO???? #who'd've thought I would go into Hazbin Hotel #and come out with freaking LUCIFER as my favorite character #I love him #he's so sad

[rosielindy]

Sunday Surrender

Deep inner work yesterday. I haven’t written for a long time. These raw emotions tumbled out of me yesterday in the just a few minutes.

Revisiting demons Cluttering my mind Paralyzing its peace

Guilt Sorrow Shame

Freudian slips Had one today As if to remind me

Loss many years ago My paths diverged Taking the easier one Led me away from me

Many twisted turns Avoiding the pain Denying the blame

Anything not to feel Substrates of betrayal Loss of illusory innocence

Tracing back Where is the core When I first chose Ego over humility

#my writing #soul searching #deep inner work #stop the cycle of pain #the only way through it is through it #my words #avoiding only makes it worse #being human

[ink-the-artist]

Rabbits

Some bonus art, I initially started making this in a totally different art style but changed my mind about halfway through lmao, here are the parts I finished

#edit: terfs fuck off #this is literally about people like you #flashing #pulsing light #eye strain #(only under the read more cut) #art #comic #colored pencil #Illustration #I realized like halfway through making this that this is just the leopards eating peoples faces party joke lmao #im glad i abandoned that original art style bc the way it gets compressed when converted to a gif is so bad 😩 #actual reason i abandoned the original style was it was taking super long #especially if i wanted it to actually look good #but i still liked how it came out so i wanted to post it anyway lol

[nerdpoe]

Dick gets his drink mixed up with another persons in the library while visiting Barbara.

He was drinking some kale smoothie thing, for health and stuff, and he set it down to grab a book from the shelf. There was another guy next to him, who also had a smoothie in the same kind of shake-n-go bottle.

They swapped by accident.

Dick checked out his book, said goodbye to Barbara, and took a sip of his smoothie.

That's the last thing he remembers.

He wakes up two days later pinned down by a practically feral Jason, who's eyes are glowing a sickly Lazarus green, with Bruce, Tim, Cass, and Duke all showing signs of losing a fight. He's sore everywhere, and Damian is nowhere to be seen.

"Uh...." his voice cracks, and he's suddenly aware of how fucking painful his throat is. "Hi? What's going on?"

"...Is it really you, Dickwing? I swear to God if it isn't and this is another-"

"Jay I really don't know what's going on, man."

Jason doesn't believe him. Dick is cuffed with anti-meta cuffs and escorted to the cave, where Bruce demands test after test and Dick tells them the last thing he remembers.

Apparently, after taking that sip, his eyes had turned to Lazarus green, and he had beelined for the mansion. Along the way there, he had run into the Riddler.

He had broken most of the Riddler's bones.

That was when everyone had been called in to subdue Dick, who for some strange reason kept gunning for Damian. Hence, Damian was upstairs and not allowed down until they were sure Dick was okay again.

It's concluded that Dick drank some alternate form of Lazarus Water, lost his mind, proceeded to take everyone out with enhanced strength and speed except Jason, who had entered a Pit episode just to keep up, and worked through it two days after consumption.

But who the fuck transported a material as dangerous as modified Lazarus Water in a fucking shake-n-go bottle?

Danny, however, is a little sad that his ecto-shake was stolen by some rando at the library.

Their kale smoothie was pretty good though.

#dpxdc #dcxdp #dp x dc #dc x dp #phanfic #story prompt #dick kept gunning for damian because he wanted to take damian somewhere safe #his parental instincts mixed with ghostly obsession for a bit #ironically if they'd let him reach damian no one would have gotten hurt #he'd have just taken damian to his apartment and made him eat cereal #but the bats kept getting in the way #so he got territorial and saw them as a threat #jason went toe to toe with him only because he was raged out on the pit #bruce got his ass handed tp him because he tried to hold back and only restrain #dick needs some recovery time because human muscles weren't meant to exert that much force #also if the bats hadn't fought him the ecto would have been in his system for a week #but it sped up going through his system because of the fighting

[aroaceleovaldez]

Nico referring to his mom as "Mama" implies he most likely at least used to refer to Hades as "Papa" and i 100% headcanon he still does but mostly in the manner of him having the entire Underworld wrapped around his finger for being the baby of the family

#pjo #riordanverse #nico di angelo #headcanon #my art #nico flexing youngest child privilages by pulling out the most pitiful expression he can manage #anyways i find it fun to explore character word choices #cause yknow no two characters are going to select their words the same way #or even necessarily think about it to the same degree #i like to think Nico thinks about his word choice a lot #so of course every time he uses ''papa'' he fully knows he's pulling the Baby Of The Family card #Hades definitely knows this too but falls for it every time anyways #cause Nico hasnt called him ''papa'' regularly since getting his memory wiped - just detached ''father'' or at best ''dad'' #so it just reminds Hades of How Much He Just Wants His Children To Be Happy Like The Old Days #and how much poor Nico has been through and he's just the baby of the family and- #cue Nico smugly staring at the camera cause he knows how much power he holds #also i say Nico is Hades' only son cause mythologically even when Zagreus *is* Hades' son (rarely) he's. dead. #a major part of Zagreus' mythology is that he died #and im p sure every other deity said to be Hades' children are all goddesses and also are like 50% of the time not his #theres also only like 3 of them. and as far as we know in riordanverse canon one of them is implied to not be his daughter #so Nico is Hades' only son and also youngest in the family (cause Hazel is older by a month chronologically or 1 year biologically) #(and everybody else is a deity if children of hades at all)

[itslucyhenley]

the creators of Ted Lasso really said we’re going to make a football show using every rom-com trope and beat not about an actual romantic pairing but rather to tell a story about grown ups becoming better people through love, openness, mutual support, and therapy.

#they said fuck toxic masculinity #they said fuck toxic sports culture #they said fuck winning being the ultimate goal #we’re playing the game of life and being better is the only clear way through #ted lasso #ted lasso spoilers

[smalltownnights]

Chris Pine went full eldest daughter dissociating at family events and you know what good for him

#he’s literally in a different dimension or thinking about what to eat for dinner #it’s pretty much the only way to get through #from experience #dwd #dont worry darling #venice film festival #chris pine

[welcometogrouchland]

[ID in ALT] I've made posts before about Talia/Dick co-parenting Damian moments (will never happen but let me dream) and this came to me in a vision. Took me ages to finish for some reason 😭 and then even longer to post

#dc comics #dc #damian wayne #dick grayson #talia al ghul #batfamily #dc robin #nightwing #anyway. yes im a self-indulgent ''dick as damians secret third parent'' truther #like i DO think it's way more complex and nuanced than the schmoopy affectionate fan portrayal of it #they're brothers they're father and son they're partners they're the dynamic duo except only in past tense etc etc #but consider! I'm not immune to schmoopy affection in fanworks. it compells me despite itself #anyway it's technically not that crazy when it comes to dick and damian. they hug! often! at least they did #it's not as big a leap to these types of scenarios #also talia ''somewhat absent for complex reasons on both her and damians part but very loving and loved by her son'' al ghul #you will always be famous to me #son of the demon origin...bwahhh #anyway. someone made a comic kind of like this/like a post i made abt this topic #but way funnier bc dick and talia starting trying to beat each other up #so go look at that as well #anyway. it's been a somewhat difficult few weeks so I'm. desperately trying to take it easy #i got some reading with me (first vol of kevin smiths GA run that i found second hand and jaimes BB run vol 2!) #so we'll see how far i get through those. considering there's demons in my head telling me to re-read things (LET ME OUT!!!) #when i finish GA and BB i do plan on rereading robin 2021. as a treat to myself #it's a run I've really warmed up to as time went on #I'm keeping up w/ the current b&r run even though it is. admittedly very slow w/ some weird dialogue #i read it for the damian content more than anything. also nikas back so that's neat :] #idk I have a feeling that after absolute power shakes out we might get some more creative team switch ups #so if anyone at dc is interested in taking over the reigns on b&r...that could be very neat #(it's me they should hire me. please DC i have ideas listen to my red hood pitch PLEASE-)

[somnimagus]

My page for @sheikahzine; about Impaz's duty to her village, empty of people and full of memories.

[id in alt text]

#legend of zelda #loz #twilight princess #loz tp #i'm still reeling that someone sent me an ask about this one.. that they took the time to find my tumblr and tell me they liked it #it really meant a lot; thank you to anyone that stops to leave comments like that. they make me happy #but yeah! here's the usual symbolism ramble: #i thought it'd be cool to have the 'spirits' flowing one way and the cats walking through them the other way #to kinda show the difference in life inhabiting the village in the past and present #link's face is covered because impaz was just waiting for 'the hero' so his clothes are what matters; not his face #and it (hopefully) gives a surreal and intangible sense to 'the hero' she could only hope would actually show up #you can feel free to interpret the glowy blue sheikah as ghosts or just as memories of the past! i couldn't decide either way #the one on the bottom left is oot impa since she's implied to be the village founder. so i guess she would be a ghost actually? #fan art #my art #project stuff #and ahhh the book-- everyone's stuff is so beautiful!! #especially the writing. some of the fics made me really tear up and some were so fun and clever. i really love them #a lot of them captured the sheer burden of the role of the sheikah; all of the time and grief and doubt #i know i always say this stuff about every project but. the people i get to work with in these are truly so skilled every time

[stil-lindigo]

patchwork canary.

a comic about two girls, fate, and a powerful man who felt entitled to something that wasn’t his to own.

support me on patreon (if you’d like to see more comics like this one)

#cw: blood and implication of gore #lgbt #sapphic #comic #lesbian #nea and nary are meant for each other #its just that halfway through i realised a slowburn type romance suited them more #hence the fact they dont do any kissie smoochie stuff in this #not that physicality is the only way you can show romantic love #but i did just want to mention it in case it wasnt clear #theyre not /just/ friends basically #horror #just a little #id love it if this became my brand #slightly unsettling queer romantic stories #i struggled with this one quite a bit #just perfectionism #pushing and pulling to see where i could go with it #i hope you enjoyed it #and as always #thank you for reading #stillindigo art

[mipexch]

stupid big ass eyeball

context(???)

#ultrakill #this makes no sense. i dont care #king minos #minos prime #gabriel #im in the minos trenches #only way i can express that is through shit like this #minosgabe #I FORGOT TO TAG IT #gen art

[lowpolysonic]

drew these sillies ages ago and forgot to post them...

#i only remembered these bc i was going through my priv ig n saw 1 of these in a post from september n i was like WAIT. i never posted these. #i was trying smth different i think w the way i drew them n i dont like some of it anymore but these made me giggle enough to let u all see #sonic the hedgehog #shadow the hedgehog #knuckles the echidna #miles tails prower #sonic #shadow #knuckles #tails #sth #munna's art

[bulldagger-bait]

I've always been curious to know this about the people around me. Most people have been in severe pain, but in my experience few have had what they would say is their 10/10 experience. I guess it's just something I find fascinating, as I had my 10/10 experience quite young and I sometimes forget that not everyone has. In my opinion it changes your relationship with pain and how you engage with it afterwards. If you answered yes, feel free to elaborate on your circumstances in the tags!

(reblog for a bigger sample size etc)

#I was 13 and mine was after spinal fusion surgery for scoliosis. T6-L4 fusion and when i woke up in spinal shock it was agonising pain #they had to give me ketamine before the pain died down and even then it was only 9/10 #i was on a fentanyl drip for a few days afterwards and ever 5mins and 50sec id be dosing myself #my dad would take over my button while i was sleeping and set a timer on his watch to push it at those intervals #it was the only way i could rest as without it id wake up in blinding pain #definitely the hardest experience of my life. sometimes i forget that i went through that and came out the other side. #polls #chronic pain #disability #spoonie #cripple punk #cripplepunk #the tags ive chosen kinda skew the balance in favour of the yes but idk what else to tag it with. #it would be interesting to see if other disabled people have also had a 10/10 and how common that is

[foe-paw]

YOU THOUGHT THAT YOU COULD OUTSMART THE VERY THING THAT RUNS THE BLOOD OF YOUR KIND?

#starkid #black friday #team starkid #hatchetfield #uncle wiley #wilbur cross #foe art #my brain disease re. this weasel guy in full denim continues #in Mine own headcanon he was very similar to john mcnamara when he entered the portal - a strongly moral person and a patriot #but wiggly manages to establish that the only way for wilbur to get what he wants (to help his country even though it is sick and militaris #and poisoned with consumerism and the chase for money above all else- #(wilbur cross is an anticapitalist is what i'm saying) #anyways yeah. wiggly sells despair and wrath and convinces him that the Only Way to save the world is through wiggly's ways! #no hope otherwise! #so....... why not become a comically evil double-crossing full-denim satan archetype! #also fun fact it took me two whole watches of black friday before realizing wiley wasn't meant to be literally satan #he's only figuratively satan! #the anticapitalist activist we deserve :]

[lotus-pear]

dazai stop rizzing up the enemy challenge go!!

#i'm convinced the whole meursault arc is just a massive hangover dream fabricated by dazai💀 #when your friend group is small but you're all gay and mentally ill #literally all i could think about watching dazai waltz around with sigma and flirting with him nonstop was fyo and chuuya just going :/ #while watching them through the security cameras #honestly they slayed sokouku could never #no better way to spend your last thirty minutes alive than ballroom dancing with the enemy against their will #dazai and sigma's interactions are the only thing keeping bsd fans (me) sane atp #bungo stray dogs #bungou stray dogs #bsd #dazai osamu #sigma bsd #nakahara chuuya #fyodor dostoevsky #sigzai #soukoku #skk #lotus draws

[orionsangel86]

You know every single fandom ever has done the merman AU. There is a mountain of fanfiction and fanart out there for merman AUs. You think of a popular ship, I guarantee you there is merman AU fanworks of it.

OFMD just decided to bring the merman AU to canon for a hot moment. A bold move. A batshit crazy move. A fucking power move in my opinion. Anyone doubting this show was for fandom can no longer doubt it. Call it cringe or embarassing all you like, but I am so fucking impressed they did that. Amazing. 10/10 no notes. Sorry to any Kiwi's present but Rhys Darby makes for a very hunky merman too. They fully dedicated themselves to getting New Zealands funny uncle into a proper silicon merman tale, complete with pretty flowy fins and actual GLITTER and made him swim up to Taika Waititi underwater in a recreation of that scene from Splash. No one is doing it like them. I think the only way a show could top this is somehow bringing omegaverse to the silver screen... but that is perhaps a tad too far across the fandom/canon divide!

#ofmd #ofmd s2 #ofmd s2 spoilers #blackbonnet #our flag means death #rhys darby #taika waititi #stede bonnet #edward teach #there is only one other person alive willing to cross these fandom boundaries #and that person is neil gaiman #i hope he watches ofmd and takes it as a challenge #the only way to top this is to put david tennant and michael sheen through just as much carnage in gos3 #i dare him