#same affirmation as last month | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

hoshigray · 4 months

Text

𝐋𝐈𝐅𝐓 𝐌𝐄 [& 𝑭𝑼𝑪𝑲 𝑴𝑬] 𝐔𝐏!! | tōji fushiguro

𝐒𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: It's bad enough you got a crush on your gym instructor, Toji; however, it gets worse when things become too close and personal for this relationship...But who says you shouldn't get a little praise for your hard work?

𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬: personal trainer! Toji x fem! reader - explicit contents; minors DNI - unrequited/crushing » mutual pining - sex in a public space (gym locker room + showers) - shower sex - thigh riding - oral (m! + f! receiving) - ball massaging - face + throat-fucking - breast fondling + nipple play - against a wall + upstanding citizen + standing 69 positions - praise - clitoral play (swiping and pinching) - cervix fucking - pet names (angel, baby, doll, dollface, good girl, princess, sweetie, sweet thing) - unprotected sex (doesn't shoot inside tho) - overstimulation - cameos: Haibara and Ino (gym manager and employee) - the reader accidentally walks into the men's locker room (they're a bit dumb, forgive them, lol) - mention of sweat spit and tears.

𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐂𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 8.4k (i'm about to lose my mind, bro.)

𝐀𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐍𝐨𝐭𝐞: mannnnnn, the way this draft has been collecting dust, it was supposed to be released on Dec!! ofc my first fic back would be for toji lmao. anyways, i hope you enjoy, and tysm for 4.7k y'all are so sweet ;;w;; and thank yeww @ramonathinks for beta-reading, mwah mwah

“That one was weak; do another three.”

“Gahh– …You’re such an asshole, Fushiguro.”

“Heh, like that’s anythin’ new. C’mon, let’s go!”

We’re counting down to the last weeks of the year, and so many people have already promised affirmations for themselves in the upcoming year. In terms of this year, you can’t say much. You’ve done your work, hung out with the same people since last year, and probably learned to spoil yourself more. Maybe another thing you can be proud of is that you crossed some TV series off your “get-to-watch” list, so go you!

Although, besides those minimal things, there is one change in your life that you’ve committed yourself to. One thing that you didn’t expect to be so in tune with throughout the past half of the year. It started as a forced challenge because your friend Miwa needed someone to motivate her to maintain her gym membership. What was once something you’d thought a one-time thing gradually became something you enjoy — something you felt proud doing!

Not only has your knowledge of your body and how to keep it in good shape improved over half a year, but your love for the community has grown more and more. The gym you go to feels like a second home, with many people you’ve gotten to know and befriend along your journey. Even the manager, Haibara Yu, practically treats you like a sibling after seeing you every other day. The same goes for the front desk associate, Ino, who is the goofiest goofball you’ve ever met (not to mention the best drinking buddy).

But – if you really had to pick – there is one person who has made this experience more enjoyable and worthwhile. “Hahhh!! There, I did them! Aren’t you supposed to be my spotter, not a shit-talker?”

“I’m doin’ my job, aren’t I?” Toji Fushiguro, your gym instructor for the past few months, has been a driving force in your physical journey. With his help, you’ve been disciplining yourself in and outside of the facility, maintaining a good diet, and keeping your body active in a balanced fashion. The gratitude you have for him supersedes all. But above all else, throughout the years, the two of you have gotten pretty close and know a good chunk about each other to call yourselves friends – at least, that’s what you’ve been doing. “Alright, that’s enough lifting for today; time for stretches.”

Aside from a friend, there is something else you refer to him as – something you’d rather die than admit out loud. Toji, your trainer, is your gym crush. Well, your crush in general.

Can you really blame yourself, though? Look at the man! When you first look at him, his physique alone is enough to keep you staring at him for hours and hours on end. Strong, bulky arms that look like they could pick up five treadmills in one sitting and with veins that decorate up to his forearm can effortlessly grab the attention of the normal eye. He’s wearing his black fitted tee, so tight that it was as if it was vacuum sealed to perfectly showcase the outline of his abdomen, ribs, and pectorals. And it doesn’t help from the back view either; you can’t count how many times you fell into a short trance from admiring his gorgeous back, from his trapezius to his waist. Every time the man flexes his biceps and triceps, all you can do is internally thank the gods for sculpting such a man to be in front of you. And those beautiful thighs and calves shaped from his black leggings and shorts? Damn.

But the thing about him that has you squeak more than a mouse are his eyes. Forest green orbs that can shift into a stern concentration whenever he’s working on a machine or when he’s observing your form and finds whatever needs correcting. Then there are times when they are mellow and soft when you’re speaking with him or when he’s deep in thought about something until you catch his attention. Then he’d throw a small smile at you — your biggest weakness. The scar on his lip being lifted to a curl never fails to put your stomach into knots.

He’s such an attractive man from the first moment you ever laid your eyes on him. You were bound to fall in love with him one way or another. It just sucks that it’s under such a professional relationship that you have to keep this little unrequited love to yourself.

Which is getting harder and harder every day, especially now when the guy is so close to your face when he’s helping you stretch. Oh, dear lord.

Every time you are done lifting weights, Toji will have you do stretches. He has you do them before and after a workout as they give your muscles time to warm up and straighten from the stress you put on them. So now, as you’re laying on your mat, Toji puts one hand on your right leg to keep it grounded on the floor and his other hand on the back of your left to push it up to your chest. The position has the two of you so close, him being situated between your legs and observing your breathing; it’s so wrong of you to dwell your mind into other things – other raunchier things.

And when he brings both your legs up to your chest, how the fuck are you supposed to calm your heart from exploding!?? You have to close your eyes during all this to not be pulled in by the examination of his gaze under his raven bangs. This is, without a doubt, the best worst part of the workouts. Thankfully, this is the last workout of the week, and the gym is about to close within an hour and a half.

Toji breaks the suffering silence between you two. “Y’re still stiff; take deeper breaths f’r me.”

Oh, if only he knew how your dirty mind took that sentence. You chew on your lip with a gulp, “Maybe I still have a little energy in me that still wants to exercise.”

That made him chortle. “Is that so? Well, maybe after your stretches, you can get on the stairmaster for a few minutes.”

You gawk at him, only furthering the smirk on his face. “Are you serious!?? You promised we wouldn’t do any cardio until next week.”

“Well, next week is around the corner,” Toji moves your knees a bit to the left, bending them further down to your chest so his face could be a little closer to yours. Your brain almost short circuits at the movement, trying to distract yourself from the fact that his groin is mere inches away from your shorts. “So, since ya got the spirit, be a doll and do a few minutes on the machine, okay? Five minutes.”

Your breathing is so slow that you’re too scared to move. Your lips pressed to a thin line to conceal the quiver, and your eyes don’t dare venture down. You already know your body is going through its own internal turmoil, a throbbing sense occurring in your lower regions the more you keep looking at Toji, who lifts a brow from awaiting your response. Oh, this man is going to kill me.

“…Five minutes.”

“Atta girl.” With a scoff, he finally straightens himself and places your legs on the mat. Toji then stands on his feet and grabs his bag. “Gonna head for the showers; finish up those stretches and head for the stepmaster. See ya later, Y/n.” And you watch him leave for the men’s locker room, finally having room to breathe. Before you can conclude your stretches with a cobra and child’s pose, you grumble to yourself in a whisper.

Why the hell did I have to fall in love with such a snarky, gruff, older guy like him…

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

You enter the locker room after completing the instructed exercise. Your mind is dizzy from walking on the step machine for about fifteen minutes, and your legs are mere minutes from turning into jelly. You curse Toji internally for the insufferable torture you’ve stressed on your poor limbs.

No matter, though; you’re finally done for the evening and can head home to your soft bed. The gym will close soon, so perhaps you could use the locker room showers to freshen up. But then again, after the strain you’ve put on your body for almost two hours, all you want to do is be home and listen to your favorite music. I don’t feel like cooking today…

Further into the room, you can hear the sound of someone using the showers, indicating you had picked the right idea to head home. You head for the locker side to grab your items to put in your bag before leaving, and it’s then that you hear the water stop running from where the showers are. Oh, shit, make this quick, Y/n!

In front of you is the locker with the number you’re familiar with — where you always leave your things, like your own spot. You open it only to find….nothing is in the locker? Huh? Where are my leggings? And my phone??

Come to think of it, where’s your duffel bag that you usually leave on the bench against the lockers? You’ve never had a problem with people stealing from you in this place, so how does a bag full of your stuff magically disappear? There is a bag in here, but it’s definitely not yours. And now that you get a good look, you start to notice that the color of the lockers is of a different, darker shade than what you’re usually accustomed to. Wait a minute, am I in the wrong—

“Y/n?”

You go still at the familiar voice. Oh no, please, God, no. There’s no way. Your eyes teeter to the corner as you ever-so-slowly turn to the direction where that voice was coming from. And, of course, it was your personal trainer, who is—OH MY GOD!!!

Toji stands afar on the opposite side of you from the showers, without clothing, his body and hair completely drenched from water. The only thing that covers him is a white towel wrapped around his lower body. His body, which you’re used to seeing being snug tight by his gym clothes, is out for you to see as water trickled down from his clavicle, pecs, ribcage, and abs. For a split second, you take in as much of the image as you can, storing this as it’s a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity in your mind (maybe to fuel more of your erotic fantasies when you go home). But you avert your gaze when your eyes travel down his abs, counting each one until you reach below his belly button, where strays of dark hair become more prominent with a trail down his pelvis and—Okay, stop looking, stop looking!!

“M–Mr. Fushiguro!?” You croak, eyes wide with realization at what you’ve just done. Your dumbass just walked into the men’s locker room without checking first. And to add salt to the wound, your crush is the first person to catch you in the act, “O-Oh my goodness, I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to walk in here! I’ll get going—“

“No, no, Y/n, calm down,” Toji walks to where you’re standing; a mini-heart attack was about to be deployed until the older man turned to the side to grab for something in his bag. He pulls out a smaller towel. “Ya walked in here on accident, right?”

You gulp, seeing the steam from the shower still leave from Toji’s nude body. “Uhm, yeahhh, I don’t know where my head was at. Sorry…”

The gym instructor scoffs at your apology. “It happens; must’ve been a bit light-headed from the exercise and forgot where y’re at. Heh, guess those five minutes did more damage than I thought.”

“Ahaha, yeah, it was…pretty….dreadful……” Were you distracted? Yup. Because Toji used the towel he pulled from his bag to wipe off the water from his arms and face. You couldn’t help but survey the man’s movements, watching the small white towel brush on his triceps and glide down to his torso. You continue watching the small towel until your eyes drift to the happy trail on his pelvis. Your breathing goes uneven, thinking of more indecent things that connect with the trail of hair and the limb that’s shielded by the towel around Toji’s waist.

“…–ou there…Y/n?” Your name said to you snaps you back, realizing where you are and what you were doing. Your eyes crawl back to Toji’s face, who throws a small smile at you. “Eyes up here, sweetie.” Sweetie?!? If the floor could give way and swallow you, that would be appreciated. “Is there anythin’ else you need to tell me while y’re here?”

No, I’m in the men’s locker room, so I need to hurry and get the fuck out! “Uhmm, n-nope, nothing at all! So…I better get going now. See you later, Mr. Fushiguro!” You turn on the heel of your foot to head for the door, only able to take about five giant steps before Toji stops you again.

“How was it today?”

Oh, for fuck’s sake, what now!? You look over your shoulder. “Excuse me?”

“The workout. How was it?”

“It…It was, umm, alright, I guess. I feel like I could’ve done better on the weights.”

“And why is that?”

Your body turns to have your front fully face him again. “Well, I mean, I was struggling at the last few reps…I’m sure you noticed, too, since you scolded me about it.”

He hums. “Ya know I correct you because, I know, you can do better, right, Y/n?” It was rhetoric, but you humor him with a slow nod. He brings the small towel to his head and dries his damp hair. “I’ve had many clients who come at me with everything they got or burned out before the first two months. But don’t worry, Y/n, I can tell you take pride in what we’re doing, and it’s good to know…”

His words drown out from your ears. You didn’t mean for it to – you really didn’t. But while Toji was fixing his hair, you snuck more peeks at his body, enjoying his side profile. Admiring the way his arms move and flex, following the rocky silhouette of his abs that lead down to the towel again, you gasp at the dent of something that appears to be between Toji’s legs. Good lord, even with the cotton material covering him, you can still see it and—

“….Y/n.” Oh no, I did it again. You gulp with eyes venturing back to Toji’s face; the grin grew broader than before. “That's twice, sweet thing.”

“S–Sorry, Mr. Fushiguro. It’s just that you have a...uhhh…” The heat in your ears makes it hard to concentrate on looking at the ground, anything to avoid your instructor’s gaze. “…..areallynicebody—“

“Hmm? I didn’t hear that, sweetie,” Sweetie? Sweetie!? Why'd he call me that? What you should be questioning is why that nickname made your stomach flip. But who are you kidding — if anyone had a crush on their instructor and were called a cute name like that, of course, they’d be as hot as a volcano. “Didn’t catch that, say it fr’ me again.”

“I–I said that,” Oh for fuck’s sake, this is so embarrassing! “You have a nice body…An attractive body, really…” The heat on your cheeks and ears is reaching heights that would have you combust at any moment. It’s what you’d hope for, honestly. It’s bad enough you’re stuck in the men’s locker room for not paying attention; now you’re here admitting to your instructor that you got the hots for him. God, please strike me here and now!

Toji says nothing after you say that, and it has your nerves at an all-time high, wondering if you should wait for his reply or just dash for the door and hope no one sees you leaving the men’s locker room. However, his voice breaks the silence, “I can say the same fr’ you.”

Oh, stop it. “Oh, please, no need to butter me up, Mr. Fushigu—“

“I’m serious.” He shuts down your argument down your argument before you can even finish. “C’mere.”

Why did you do what you were about to do? You could’ve just declined, exited the facility, and headed straight home to wallow away about this entire interaction, maybe find a different gym to form a membership with. But you didn’t. Instead, with downcast eyes, you slowly approached your instructor, who stood behind the locker bench. “Closer,” he says, noting how you’re about two arms length away from him, which you meekly decrease to one. “You don’t think ya got a nice body?”

The adjacency between you two was too much for you, your face minutes from imploding. Too shy for words, you settle for a nod to give.

“How come?”

For God’s sake, this is not a conversation you want to have now with your crush instructor in the middle of the men’s locker room. “I…Well, Mr. Fushiguro—“

“Toji,” he cuts you off, discarding the small towel to the top of his bag. “Y’re over here tellin’ me I look good when you’re the one lookin’ like you could strike any guy that walks up in this place. Doncha think so?”

Again, your eyes avoided his toweled figure, focusing on the tiled floor beneath your sneakers. “I guess, but…Toji, when compared to you, I—“

“Then that’s what ya shouldn’t be doin’, who told you to compare y'rself to others?” Toji brings a hand to your chin to make your avoidant peer placed on him, a move you were not mentally strapped in for. “I’m me, and y’re you, right?”

“Right…”

“And that’s a good thing,” the hand on your chin slides down to the inside of your hoodie, his forefinger sneaking under the band of your sports bra. It makes your breathing stop. “But ya know what else I think?”

“What?” You sounded so low – so tiny – you didn’t know if he could hear you. He then brings his face close to your ear, and you could’ve sworn you almost felt your heart jump out of your throat. His free hand comes around your waist, pulling you even closer to him. The cotton of the towel now brushed your leg, and you could sink into a pool of embarrassment at the gasp you let out.

His voice was hoarse and low, the air from his nostrils grazing the skin of your ear. “…I think y’r body is the sexiest thing I’ve seen.”

The sentence hit you like a truck, your heart almost giving in to a complete shutdown. “Huh–Ohhhh, wait,” Toji takes a nibble of your ear while his hand slithers your hoodie off of you, freeing your arms and covered chest where he creeps his hand inside next. You whimper at his fingers on your nipples that harden at his grinding touch. “Toji, wait, please wait…Do you really mean—“

“Mhmm, I do,” He coos, and a kiss to your neck nearly has you give way and lose balance; lucky for you, Toji was smart enough to have a leg between yours. “Now that I have you here, I’ll prove it.”

“We’re—Ahhnnn…But we’re in the men’s locker room,” Toji brings his face up to look at you, your half-lidded eyes locked with his emerald orbs. “Someone could see us…”

Your worries are taken with a caress to your cheek. “Don’t worry about other people when y’re with me. I gotcha, baby.”

“And I’m…Ohooo, really sweaty…”

“Nothin’ a shower can’t fix.”

And before you refute him again, Toji places his scarred lips onto yours, a shocked moan muffled as he kisses and sucks on your bottom lip. The hand in your bra now positions to the back of your neck, positioning you for him to deepen the kiss once you allow him access to your mouth. And once you kiss him back, all the reins of restraint have been discarded along with your hoodie to the floor.

The sounds of lips smacking get louder by the second, the passion in the kiss unraveling when you bring your hands to cup his cheek and have his face practically glued to yours. And Toji complies, shoving his tongue to tease and play with yours. The hand that was on your waist comes down to your ass for him to grope with the flesh, urging more of your sobs to be taken from him. Is it possible for your brain to turn into mush from a kiss? You’re finding that out now, breaking the kiss to gather whatever air you can before Toji claims your lips again.

The leg you’re riding on is nestled between your thighs, rubbing against the groin of your shorts. With every kiss and hump comes a grind on his leg, and it alleviates the growing ache that’s flourishing in your panties. Shivers travel up your spine and heighten your horniness, this elated feeling so dangerous that you could turn into putty at any second.

Toji lets go of your lips with a heavy pant, breathlessly snickering at his work; turning his cute client into a mess flipped a switch he’s been dying to indulge with. “Mmmm, y’re too fuckin’ cute, baby,” he wipes your mouth before letting you go; you hold back a whine when he removes his warm figure from you and steps back. It’s then that your instructor finally removes the towel that’s been shielding a now-discernible tent. The white towel meets the floor, and you follow his happy trail to meet with his erection, a sight that makes your jaw drop. The older man takes a seat on the bench behind him, and his legs spread out for his dick and balls to be ever-so-present and seen.

“Ya see how crazy you and y’r body make me?” He bites his lip, getting more turned on with you marveling at him and his length. “C’mere, angel, lemme see what you can do.” It takes a good mental slap to snap out of your frozen state and look at the thing you’ve been imagining all these months. Now, when the chance has finally been brought to you, how could you pass this up? Following Toji’s command, you come close and go to your knees between his legs.

The sheer size and girth of his length nearly put you in a trance, your eyes taking every detail of his erection before your eyes. Every dent and curve, the prominent veins from the underside, and the oddly pretty pink tip where bits of precum dare protrude from the urethra. Your raised hand has hesitance, yet Toji is quick to assuage your unease, taking your hand with his and wrapping it on his cock. The rough skin on your palm hitches your breath, “Hmmm, oh fuck. Yeah, just like that, princess.”

And there he goes again, egging you on with more cute pet names. Your hand slides up and down along his shaft from the tip to the base, and the sensation of its veins is so raunchy for your overwhelmed fingertips. Toji’s gruff hums to your touches stick to your ears the most, a sound you never in your wildest dreams thought you’d be lucky enough to hear. You want to keep hearing them, want them to be stored in your memory for as long as you can. And when you meekly tease his glans with a tiny lick, the hiss he expresses turns you on even more, so much so that you take the tip with patience and start to suck.

Toji throws his head back to the lockers behind him; the feeling of your tongue rolling around his girth as you inhale his cock is crazy. Fuck, it felt so good – he has to fight the urge to rut into your hollow cheeks and puffy lips. “Hahhh…Mmmm, damn….Ahahaha, ya know how to use that mouth of y’rs, Y/n. Keep suckin’ me off like that, and I’ll—Ohhh! Shit, shit, shiiiit,” he wasn’t prepared for you to take in his entire erection to the hilt. The tightness of your throat around him sends shivers, having to use the bench to grip onto.

You bob your head along his length, a hand accompanying the motions to further the exhilaration. Spit and come wet your palm, yet you’re too focused on the task to care, the haze of your brain increasing every time your lips meet the pubes of his pelvis. The jerk of his hips entails that you’re doing a good job, Toji bringing a hand to the back of your head when you kiss and lick on the head of his cock. You take note, assuming that it’s his weak spot, and continue to suck and tease the tip some more, massaging his testicles which almost had him choke.

“—Hnnmph! Fuckin’ shit, I can’t…” Toji then has enough of this ribbing pleasure, unable to hold it anymore. With a careful hold on your skull, he stands from the bench and plows your face with his member. The harsh hit of his hips propelling his dick down to the deep crevices of your throat was sudden; the assault on your uvula results in your gag reflex; however, Toji was here to calm you down, “It’s alright, angel, breathe fr’ me.” He caters to you with a mediocre rhythm to the hips, the movement relieving the abrupt stress to your throat as you hum on his cock. You find purchase on his thighs to stabilize yourself while he plays with you orally, dialing up the pumps to your mouth until it reaches an erratic mood. Fuck, it has your head ringing, but the growing twinges and throbs between your legs practically excite you for more. Goddamn, it feels so good. So fucking good. “Jesus Christ—Y/n, I’m ‘bout to cum. Keep swirlin’ that tongue…Nnmmm, fuuck, right there, right there—Ahhhck!!”

His release comes with a few rough hits to your lips, his balls hitting your chin until they’re pressed against it. He pups his load into you, and you take it like a champ, letting the fluid venture down as the girth pulsates around your walls. His choked breathing eventually simmers down, giving it a few long seconds before he steadily removes himself from your warm cavity. The last remnants of his white substance paint your tongue, your saliva coating him. And with a voluntary swallow, you open your mouth again to showcase your clean change.

“Heh, didn’t even have to tell you,” Toji chortles, bringing a thumb to wipe your chin. “Good girl.”

KA-CHA! CREEEEK!!

Wide green eyes shoot wide along with yours, and the both of you go frozen rigid. That was most definitely the sound of a door opening. The door to the men’s locker room, where you are on your knees, in front of your personal instructor, with his dick out for the whole world to see. The blood in your body runs cold, and your stomach drops to the chilly floor. Oh, it’s over. It’s done. Your life is officially coming to an end. Welp, it’s time for me to think of a good suicide note when I get home and—

Pause on that. Because one moment you were thinking of your demise from this discomfiting situation, next you’re being dragged by Toji to the other part of the locker room, the showers. He swiftly opens a curtain and throws you both inside with a close, and the wet tiles soaked to your socks have you cringe, so you take them off.

“Hello?” It’s a guy’s voice, of course — Ino’s. The young man is probably inspecting the male locker rooms before they close for the night like usual. You don’t dare speak so much as a letter when the footsteps draw closer to the showers, your heart rate spiking to a nervous high, and your breathing shallow. This is worse; now you’re in a confined space, face-to-face with Toji, who is utterly nude, towel left back on the bench. Your eyes locked with his, and your ears to the sounds of shoes entering the plane. “Anyone here? Saw some stuff at the front.”

“Yeah, I’m here,” your expression turns to sheer terror, wide orbs looking at the raven-haired man who spoke. No! Why would you say something!?

“Hmm? Toji, that you?” Ino’s voice comes closer, in front of the shower curtain that shields you from his field of vision. Your heart is on the verge of dropping to your intestines. “You’re still here? Figured you’d be home by now.”

“Nah, I’m still here. Just about to finish up and head out.” Toji then turns on the faucet, cold peeps of water hitting your sweaty skin, panties, and sports bra. And, of course, it catches you off guard. OH FUUUUUU— You don’t scream. You can’t. Instead, you shield your mouth and turn your back to Toji after giving him the most outstanding death glare of your life, which the older finds amusement in. You wipe your face from the water, cursing internally at this entire predicament.

“Oh, okay, cool. I was just worried someone left their stuff on that bench over there. Carry on, and have a good night!” Ino dismisses himself and leaves the showers, and you exhale a silent sigh of relief. Oh, thank goodness…

Toji, on the other hand, sees your relieved state, and he can’t help but grin to himself with what he’s about to do. Moving closer to you, he brings his wet hands to your sports bra and immediately goes to fondling your breasts. A moan sneaks past you at the contact, prompting him to grope you even more. “T–Toji,” the water gradually gets warmer, juxtaposing with his cold fingers. “Stop, we have to leave, this is—Ohooo…” He tweaks your nipples with his forefinger and thumbs, and a leg sneaks in between yours.

“Relax, dollface, it’s just you and me here,” Oh, sweet Lord, you almost fell to your knees when he whispered to your ear and a teasing lick to your helix. “Got ya all to myself, now…” Toji kisses the crook of your neck, his wet hair brushing your cheek while he snakes his hand down into your panties. The way his fingers graze your clit again has you arch your back to him, another hushed shriek when he bullies his way between your folds.

“Hey, Toji?” Ino’s voice again. Back to anxious stakes now that Toji’s toying with you. Goddamn it, Ino! What are you still doing here!? “I noticed you left your towel on the bench over there. But I also saw Y/n’s hoodie there.” Oh, fuck me!! Shit, shit, shit—"Ohhmph!!"

With quickness, you covered your mouth before your moan caught the ears of the front desk employee. And the reason for that is that Toji pulled down your soaked underwear and gave your chasm a sudden lick. If Ino weren’t back here, you’d give your personal trainer the nastiest kick to the throat you could ever do. But when he inserts a finger inside you, your aggression withered away in seconds.

“Huh? Ohh, yeah, ‘bout that,” Toji stands back up and continues to finger you, chuckling at the sight of your trembling figure using the wall as leverage. “I saw ‘em before headin’ to the locker room. We talked for a while, but then they said they needed to change and told me to hold their hoodie for ‘em.” He says it so casually, all the while scraping your inner walls with the tip of his forefinger, summoning hushed cries that turn to silent screams when his free hand comes down to playfully pinch and press on your clitoris. God, this is too much torture for one night.

Ino keeps questioning. “Really? I had someone check the other locker rooms, and she said she didn’t see anyone or anything except for a few personal items and leggings in one of the lockers. I’m guessing those would be Y/n’s, but where could they be?” Little did he know that you were just a curtain pull away from being found, chewing hard on your lip to quash your screams from the erratic swiping on your clit and the curving hits of his digits in your wetness.

“Mmmm, they probably are at another part of the gym or waitin’ for me at the front.” He lies effortlessly, yet his attention is still on you as he removes his fingers from you, the pleasure subsiding from the removal. Instead, he brings his erection in between your folds and humps you, and the feeling of his dick on your lips worsens the throbs in your awaiting cunt. With the heat coming from the shower and your uneven breaths, you’re bound to faint at any moment.

“Ahh, makes sense. Alright, I’ll try and find them then,” you don’t say anything, just hesitant breaths when you feel the tip of Toji’s cock align and lightly push to your slick-coated entrance. Holy fuck, this is actually happening! Your lips quiver when Toji comes down to your ear to tell you to relax your body from tension, quietly maneuvering you by pulling your lower half to him. You do big inhales and exhales while the man pushes his cockhead to enter your cunt, wincing at the few seconds of pain that accompany each push. “See you later, Toji, and I put your towel on the hood next to your shower for when you’re done. Good night!”

“See ya.” And with Toji’s dismissal, Ino’s footsteps draw farther and farther from where you two are. And the moment you hear the locker room door slam close, Toji pushes the entire cockhead inside of you. Finally, you can squeal out to your heart’s content, balling your fists on the shower wall while your personal trainer wedges his length inside of you and stretches your walls. The girth was definitely something you knew would be an obstacle to accommodate, and it’s worse when your slit keeps clamping around the foreign limb invading inside. Tears begin to swell from the stinging touch, not that they would be distinguished by the shower water hitting behind you and Toji.

“Haahh, ahahhnn, mmmm,” Your wails seep out from your system right as the base of his cock kisses your lower region lips. And after a few seconds, he starts with a slow pace. Knowing that you can feel every dent and vein within you is insane to comprehend; the heat across your cheeks cranks up due to the euphoric sensations. “Ohhhh, my God, Tojiii. I’m so full…”

Toji pecks on your shoulder, “Yeah, sweet thing? I bet so. Just be a good girl and keep grippin’ on me like that, alright? Gonna start movin’ now…” His hips rut into your vagina, pulling his shaft slowly outward and rushing it back inward. Holy shit, it felt so dreamlike — having him actually move inside of you. But it was very much real; having his pelvis meeting the flesh of your ass was proof of such.

A hand snakes down to your clitoris, and a gasp leaves your lips at the brush of his thumb rubbing against it. Your legs tremble at the flick of his finger on your bud, and the pace of his thrusts crank up in speed, making it hard to concentrate on one thing. So many senses are being activated all at once; the shower water raining down on your back, the exhilarating combination of Toji’s dick grinding down on your insides, and the swipes and pinches on your precious clitoris. God, it was all too much.

“Arch some more fr’ me, princess,” Toji gets up to push your back further down, the walls of your chasm clinging onto him as the more exposed opening gives room for you to be plowed. “Hnnmm, shit, feels so good…Hey, let’s try somethin’ different.”

By the time the last bit of his sentence could be registered, he already had you turned to face him, folding your arms around his neck. You didn’t know what for until he hoisted you up, and then you instinctively grabbed hold for dear life before your back hit the wall, your legs wrapped around him while he held you by the thighs. Toji brings his member back to your labia to insert it back inside, and you two moan at the contact again. Oh, this was different – never have you been lifted like this. And to be elevated by your gym crush, in this connotation, is enough to have you appalled.

But what made your breath hitch the most was Toji’s face being up close and personal. The bangs stuck to his forehead thanks to the shower water; his jet-black hair was wet and slicked. Trails flow down his face, drops of water plummeting from his nose and chin. And – oh, sweet Jesus – those green eyes of his, so striking as if they could pierce right through you. They were piercing through you. He took in your expression just as you were his, eyes filled with wanton desire, and it was all directed towards you – for you. He flashes a small smile, teeth peeking from beneath his scarred lips.

Oh, my God. You turn to the side to hide your face from his gaze; it definitely wasn’t the water that was making your cheeks and ears hot at that moment. But that didn’t fly with Toji. He sneaks into a rut that has you jump on his cock, the new position giving his dick an angle to hit your cervix. Because of that, the jab erupts a shriek you had no preparation for withholding.

“Heh, aht, aht, don’t do that,” Oh, he knows he’s in control of this entire situation; you can hear it in his patronizing chortle. “Don’t hide that pretty face from me, doll,” he kisses your cheek and trails down to the crook of your neck. “Let me hear you—Aiishhh! Oh, fuuck…”

Once Toji begins to jerk his hips to you, you dwell into a pleasure that you never knew existed. Toji’s length scrapes your inner walls like crazy, like a euphoric itch. The fact that you’re bouncing on the cock of your personal trainer is scary to comprehend. Having him see you like this, hearing you moan and wail for him, you never felt more exposed in your entire life. And also, him holding you like you weigh nothing and fucking you in the men’s locker room showers?! What the actual fuck!? This is actually so embarrassing – I could die!

But why would you? The commotion between your legs feels way too good to bring this to a stop – you two are already joined in a union, so why stop? Every stroke to your slit sends a shiver up your spine, clamping onto him every time he brushes up on your sweet spots that make your nerves tingle. And the occasional jabs to your tender cervix? Damn, the stimulation was enough to have you faint with the heat growing tenfold.

“Mmmff, hoohhh, ohhhhh,” your cries are drowned out by the shower, only heard by Toji. Speaking of, this position gives you proximity to observe his expression. His eyebrows furrowed, eyes shut as if he’s in the zone. The huffs of breath he takes with every roll of his pelvis are so hot to the ear that you wouldn’t mind listening to them all day. Anytime the walls of your wetness clamp onto him, he moans and hushed curses at the feeling of you wanting him. He’s an attractive man, but, holy fuck, this was a sight you thought you’d never see in a million years.

“—Khhhh! Hnmph, ahhhh,” Through the gruff pants, Toji opens his eyes half-lidded, catching you in the moment of staring right at him. You clench onto him; why does this man have to look so fucking sexy!? He smirks, “How we feelin’ now, baby?”

“Hahhh, I–I’m—Ohhh!! Fucking shiiiitt,” you cry out when he slams deep into you, making your toes curl, and your words come out in slurs. “It’s too muuchh, Tojiii, ughhh!! T–Tooo muuuuch…”

“Ya gettin’ close?” Oh, yes, you were. You could feel it through the trembles climbing up your fibers. Your brows trench at the high, and Toji was mean enough to sneak a pinch to the clitoris without you noticing. Your legs tighten around his waist, and you shake your head hurriedly. He chuckles, releasing your clit from his rough fingers and putting his forehead to yours. “C’mon, angel, I won’t know what you want if ya don’t say it.”

Fuck, he’s such a meanie. You love it so fucking much. You mewl to him, “Pleaseee, Tojiii, I want it so bad!”

He lifts a brow. “Want what?”

“—To cum!! Pleasepleaseee, I wanna cum on you, I want it—Ahaahhnn!!” Fuck, it’s coming. Almost there.

That’s all he needed to hear, the grin on his face broadening at your response. “Cum on me, then. I’m right here to catch ya, princess.” His hand returns to your clitoris, pressing down on the delicate button to the point where all he can hear is your sweet screams of lust. His thrusts now get erratically fast, having you rebound to the hilt of his length, the smacks of skin slapping against each other fill the confined space of the shower. And the climb of your aroused high increases until it comes crashing down; you let out one last howl as the electric shocks course through your body, and your release is freed. Your walls squeeze hard onto Toji as you indulge in your climax; him pistoning his cock to your sensitive labia adds to the chilling sensitivity. Your cunt flutters around his cock while you experience your crescendo, your eyes screwed shut to enhance the experience, not aware of Toji watching you ride out your orgasm on him.

The trembles calm down, the shocks subside, and your breathing descends into a steady rhythm. Throwing your head back, you rest your back against the wall while still in Toji’s hold, using this time to indulge yourself in this moment of clarity.

Toji lets out a tiny laugh, bringing his face to your neck to suck on it. “That felt good, sweet thing?” You sigh out of breath, nodding to his question. “Hmmm, good. But ya know I’m not done, right?” Your blood ran cold, your body rigid still. Wait, huh? “I let you have your fun, so be a good girl, and lemme have mine.”

The involuntary twitch of your slit should give you a clue as to how the news hit you, and you can't tell if it'll be him or the shower that will have you melting like a puddle by the time this is over...

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

Haibara walks out to the front desk, where Ino hurriedly stuffs his phone back into his pocket, away from his superior’s eyes. Fortunately for the younger man, the older one didn’t see his device. “Hey, Ino, I got a question.”

“Yeah, what’s up?” The associate fidgets with his brown hair under his rolled-up ski mask.

“Have you seen Mr. Fushiguro and Y/n today? Toji told me he couldn’t make it for Monday night, but I haven’t seen Y/n that day or Wednesday.” The older brunette looks around to find any resembling cues, but his eyes see nothing that sparks familiarity.

Ino blinks before answering. “No. And now that you mention it, I haven’t seen or heard from them since last week…”

Haibara leans on the desk and sighs. “Hope Y/n’s doing all right. Usually, they’d call or shoot a text telling me they couldn’t make it for their appointments with Fushiguro. But this is twice where neither of them show up.”

“Hmm, can’t say I have an idea.” The other shrugs at his superior’s concerns. “I didn’t get a call or text from Y/n either, so maybe I’ll give ‘em one after my shift. Heh. Let’s hope they didn’t replace us with another gym.”

With trenched brows, Haibara took offense to the younger brunette’s words. “Cut that out, man! I’d be pretty upset if they just suddenly stopped showing up here. Half a year of coming in and out and getting to know each other, only for them to just vanish like that…At the very least, they could give a call!” He passionately bangs on the front desk, giving Ino a startle.

RING-RING-RING!! RING-RING-RING!!

The two froze at the sudden ring of the desk phone as if Haibara’s fist magically granted them a call. And by the exchanged glances they shared before Ino picked up the phone, they better hope it wasn’t the call they were expecting. “Hello, this is Golden Gate Gym. My name is Takuma Ino; what can I do for you?”

“Hey, is that you, Ino?”

“Hey, Y/n!” Ino turns to Haibara, whose eyes share the same perplexity as his. “It’s good to hear from you; where’ve you been? You’ve been MIA for almost a week.”

“Yeah, sorry about that. I had a little accident and sprained my ankle; I couldn’t come to the gym on Monday and Wednesday.”

“Oh, shit, for real?” Haibara watched the younger man’s tone change to concern, which didn’t help his nerves either. “Sorry to hear about that, but it’s a good call not coming here and taking care of yourself.”

“Yeah, thanks. Is Haibara there with you by any chance?”

“Uh, yeah. He’s right next to me, actually.” Ino takes the initiative to give the darker brunette the phone to speak with the one on the other side of the line. Haibara outstretches his arm to take the phone and put the receiving end to his ear. “Yo, Y/n!”

“Hey, Haihai. I meant to call you Wednesday, but I’m letting you know that Mr. Fushiguro and I are still doing our weekly appointments.”

Haibara sighs in relief internally, giving Ino a thumbs up. “Oh, thank God! You two had me worried there for a second. We didn’t see you guys here and thought you’d be a no-show again.”

“Yeah, sorry for the scare. Mr. Fushiguro found out about it and decided it would be….Haahhh….best for me to do my regimine at my apartment instead…”

“Well, that’s nice of him to look out for you with your ankle. I’m sure he’s doing what he can to—“

“Ahaahhnn!!”

A sudden yelp pops into the call out of nowhere and completely takes Haibara aback from the phone as if it was so out of place for the topic that was taking place. Ino notices it when the darker brunette gives him a brief perplexed look, which the younger shrugs at. “Uhh, Y/n? You busy right now?”

Oh, you were busy, all right. You’re at your apartment right now. Your ankle? Absolutely fine, nothing wrong about it in the slightest. The only change, however, is not being at the gym for this entire week and staying home instead. Why?

How about asking your personal trainer who has you propped upside down, standing up with his hands holding you by your ass, stuffing his face to your exposed cunt which he licks and sucks on. The feeling of his tongue digging through your labia has your hips jerking, but his strong arms exhibit unmoving effort in keeping your wetness in his mouth. His pants down to his knees, and his erect length in your hand and brushing your cheek. This is most definitely not the at-home exercise that Haibara is thinking of.

“…Hello?…Y/n, you there?”

Oh, shit! “Y–Yeah, I’m here! Sorry, my ankle is acting up on me—Ohhhh…Fushiguro’s looking at it for me…” Oh, please, he’s not checking shit; fucker indulging himself between your asscheecks, ravishing your folds like a sweet fruit to his tastebuds.

“Oh! So you two are exercising together right now?” Toji nibbles on your vagina and grazes with his teeth, having you gasp and twitch. His tongue surprising your clit prompts a choked whine. “That’s good to know then! Alright then, see you guys when you’re ready to return to the gym. And tell Toji not to put too much on you, ya hear?”

“—Khhhh, mhmm…I’ll give him an earful for you. See you later, Haibara…”

“Great, see ya. Happy Friday!”

And with that farewell, you can finally toss the phone down and coo to your heart’s content, biting your lips at Toji stuffing his mouth on your bare chasm; his muffled groans vibrate your lower half like crazy. “Ohhooo!! Ohhhfuckkk, I’m gonna cumm,” your words slur with a suck to your clitoris, your hips bucking involuntarily. “Lemme cum, Tojiiii, I wanna—Ahaaaa!!”

He removes his face from your ass with an exhale as if he was dying for breath. But based on the grin plastered on his face, he wouldn’t mind being in this position for a little while. “Oh, I don’t think so, doll. I don’t think ya deserve to cum in my mouth.”

That was the last thing you wanted to hear right now. “Ahahnn!! You’re such an asshole, Toji…”

He chuckles crudely. “That’s where I’m gonna play with next if you don’t stuff my dick in that pretty mouth of y’rs already. Suck me good; then maybe I’ll let the princess cum all over me.”

Broad strokes from his pelvis rub his dick on your cheek, a reminder of your part of this endeavor that you must partake in. The smell of him overwhelms your nostrils into a pornographic trance, your head pounding just from looking at it. You gulp and take the tip into your mouth, sucking and licking the precum off while your hands glide up and down his shaft. “Good girl, good girl…” Toji goes back to smacking his lips on your folds, moving his tongue in whirlpool motions that have you moaning on his cock. God, it feels so good, so fucking good. You can see yourself becoming addicted to this, and that’s a bit scary seeing this professional relationship drift to something more touchy and personal…

…But then again, there’s nothing wrong with that, right?

7K notes · View notes

moonlightsapphic · 10 months

Text

Releasing Nimona on the last day of pride month 2023 was such a great move because it’s a really needed piece of media right now. Lots of countries that legalised gay marriage years ago have been grappling with this rising TERF narrative of “if you’re gay it’s whatever but if you’re trans, non-binary or gender non-conforming in some way you’re a PERVERT! A MONSTER trying to GROOM CHILDREN!” The outrage against simple things like pronouns and drag events, and the movement against gender affirming healthcare have reached a terrifying peaks for contemporary times.

So a kid’s movie set in a fictional country with controlling government officials with personal agendas, with an openly gay couple but also a shape-shifting kid who cannot even be afford to be out is our reality in the US today. Nimona’s feelings about her vibe, body and form, her insistence that she is only “Nimona” no matter what she looks like and her aversion to “small-minded questions” together forms such a beautiful allegory about trans, genderfluid individuals.

Ballister asks her to be a girl, but for whose sake? It’s only for the comfort of people who refuse to understand her, and would rather see her die than let her be herself. And it’s this widespread rejection and loneliness that has eventually made Nimona indifferent to pain, that makes her feel suicidal.

In the end, it is another member of the LGBTQ+ community that truly sees and accepts Nimona for who she is. And that should be a reminder that we cannot let them divide us. Trans people stood up for the rest of us and made historical change happen, and we need to do the same for them. Besides, cis queer people are only the “good ones” until they’re done with trans people and then will turn on us.

7K notes · View notes

moonchildstyles · 6 months

Note

angel getting high for the first time 🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾

cw: drug use! its only weed, nothing heavy but if that makes you uncomfortable please skip :)

wordcount: 11.8k+

—————

(Y/N) kicked her legs in the air as she laid tummy down on her bed. She listened to the ringing from the phone pressed to her ear, waiting for a familiar voice to answer.

In the middle of the third ring, her hopes were answered when a click sounded. Muffled background noise started through the speaker, accompanying a honeyed drawl.

"Hi, lovebug," Harry murmured, his speech seemingly slower than normal.

"Hi," she chirped through her smile. Her feet kicked in the air, free hand coming up to twirl her hair around her index finger. "What are you doing?"

A random burst of laughter bubbled through the other line, distant from the phone though it was still loud. "'M on the phone, be quiet," Harry reprimanded, voice far from the receiver before he returned with a decided softer tone, "Nothing, jus' trying to watch a movie with Mitch. What about you, baby?"

"Just in bed," she mused, "I wanted to call before I went to sleep. Did you want me to let you go since you're with Mitch?"

Since deciding on moving in together once their respective leases expired, (Y/N) had been making a point to spend more time with Sarah while she was still so close. She didn't want to get in the way if Harry was trying to do the same.

"No, no, I wanna talk to you, 's alright," he assured her, "How was your day?"

It was still sweet to (Y/N) the way that she could text him all day long, telling him everything about her day, and he still would ask her a question like this. He told her once that he likes hearing her voice, even if he already knows what she's telling him.

"It was alright," she said, rolling to lay on her back, looking up at her ceiling, "I turned in that paper that I was working on last weekend, so that's all done. The library was super quiet today, though, I almost fell asleep in the philosophy section."

A small laugh sounded from Harry. "Did y'really?"

"Yeah," she sighed, a smile curling her lips, "Elizabeth had to come entertain me. But, what about you? You did that big piece today, right?"

"Yeah, the thigh piece," he said, voice thick, "She was a nice girl, but I had a headache by the time we took the first break. She liked to talk a lot. M'hand's been cramping since lunch."

A pout landed on (Y/N)'s lips. She hated hearing about those kinds of details from Harry's job. She had always figured it was so fun and glamorous, easy and fulfilling. She had never thought about the physical toll of drawing and shading and designing all day long.

"Oh, no," she hummed, instinctively rolling her wrist and curling her fingers as if she could take his pain from miles away. "Did you take anything to help?"

"Kind of. Mitch and I have been relaxing since he got home."

She knew exactly what that meant. Though Harry tended to keep this specific hobby of his separated from her, set on the back burner away from the time he spent with her, she knew better. Besides, she had found that little bag in his dresser months ago, she wasn't completely clueless (of course, he did have to explain what she had found to her, but that was a different story).

That would explain why time seemed to be moving a little bit slower on the other end of the phone, and the boisterous laughter Mitch was sharing in the background.

"Have you been smoking?" she asked, voice quiet. She always felt a bit silly bringing this up to him, unsure of what terms to be using and what meant what exactly.

"A little bit, yeah," he affirmed, "Sorry. I didn't know you'd be calling. I wouldn't have if I knew you wanted to talk tonight."

Shaking her head despite the fact he couldn't see her, (Y/N) rushed her protests. "No, no, don't be sorry. I don't mind, you know that. As long as you're happy and you guys are being careful."

"Always am, baby."

A heat bubbled in her chest at his words. While he never did it around her, there were times that she called him or he FaceTimed her before bed when he was under the influence and his voice drawling just a little deeper, sitting heavier in his chest, hit her just perfectly. She could imagine the way his eyes were a bit hooded, his tongue sticking around his words, the easy smiles that spread across his face for no other reason than he liked the feeling.

She wondered what he looked like in the act. Was it like the movies with lavender smoke and pieces of blown glass with intricate details? Or did he make his own little rolls, hanging from his lips like a cigarette?

Mitch's loud laugh on the phone brought her back to reality, blinking her back to her room and Harry's static on the other end of the phone. Harry gave a muffled response before his own laughter joined his best friend's, the sound drawling and breezy.

When he returned to the phone, she could hear the lingering smile in his tone. "I think Mitch found a movie for us to watch, love."

"What is it?" she asked, feeling the end of the phone call nearing. She would have to settle for spraying the stuffed bunny he gifted her for Valentine's Day with a sample of his cologne for her to cuddle for the night.

"I don't even know," he laughed, "but, I think 's gonna be funny. I think 'm gonna have to make us food, though, so I don't think I can talk for much longer."

"That's okay. Have fun with Mitch and I'll talk to you tomorrow, right?"

"Right," he affirmed, voice soft, "Sleep well, lovebug. I'll call you during my lunch."

"Okay," she sighed, fitting her cheek against her pillow, "I love you."

"I love you more, baby," he cooed, "Goodnight."

An exaggerated kiss noise sounded through her phone, pulling a loud peal of laughter from (Y/N)'s lips. He never really did that when he was around his friends, only putting on the show when he was calling her in private. She thought it was very sweet.

"Goodnight," she laughed, pressing the red button before she became too spoiled with his shenanigans and tried to keep the call going.

Setting her phone on her nightstand, she snuggled into her comforter, a throw blanket covering her body instead of her duvet. Pulling her studded bunny from the fringes of her bed, (Y/N) nestled her cheek against the soft fluff. The sown still smelled of Harry's house from the last time she had spent the night, bringing her back to what he was doing in her absence.

The mystery surrounding his activity of choice for the day is what flicked her curiosity. She'd seen a few movies with marijuana being an uncredited character along with a couple of books with the high feeling being described, but she had never been exposed to anything substantial in real life before she moved away from her parents. Even then, she still hadn't experienced more than the herbal scent that inevitably clung to apartment complexes so close to a university campus and the few bleary eyed classmates she had to work with.

Specifically, she wondered what Harry was like when he was in that state. Those classmates of hers always seemed disconnected, tired, and in their own head. Was Harry the same way? Did he act the way he did when he drank a little bit too much wine? Or was he wild and excitable like those in the movies? Or sleepy like she had read in her books?

What would she be like?

The idea followed her behind her shuttered eyes, her mind going a bit floaty the closer she sunk into sleep.

—————

"Sarah, have you ever... smoked weed before?"

The words felt silly falling from (Y/N)'s mouth. Was that even the correct term? She didn't know, but she kept her attention on the food she was making in front of her, hoping Sarah wouldn't notice.

"Yes," she answered with a suspicious drawl, sweeping through the apartment with a laundry basket on her hip, "Why?"

(Y/N) only shrugged. "I don't know. I've just been thinking about it." She paused, tipping her head. "What does it feel like?"

"Smoking?" Sarah pressed.

"Yeah," (Y/N) chirped, feeling shy that she was even breaching this conversation. "Or, like, being high. Is it like the movies?"

"A little bit," Sarah mused, folding her laundry on the dining room table into neat piles. "It's not as dramatic or crazy, but it can feel that way sometimes. It depends on the person. Everyone's different."

Rolling her lips, (Y/N) nodded her head. She chanced a look over her shoulder at her friend, slowing her stirring. "What are you like?"

Sarah shrugged, a crease between her brows as she thought. "I haven't smoked in a while, but I used to get really tired. It always depended on what kind we had, but I usually got really tired."

Is that what Harry did? Did he get sleepy, like some of her classmates? Did he nod off during the movie he and Mitch watched the other night?

"When was the last time?" (Y/N) asked, hoping Sarah didn't cut her off. She was genuinely curious, she hoped she wasn't prodding and poking past her welcome.

"Maybe a year ago? Could have been longer," Sarah answered. "I was with Mitch so it wasn't too long ago."

Fixing her attention back on the stirring of the soup she was making for their dinner, she tried to act casual as she spoke. "W-Was Harry there, too?"

"Harry?"

(Y/N) could hear the smile in Sarah's voice as she realized where (Y/N)'s curiosity was stemming from. She never tired of teasing just a little over how in love she was with her Harry. (Y/N) only hummed a confirmation, keeping her voice to herself.

"He wasn't there the last time, but he did used to smoke with us sometimes," Sarah explained, sounding a little too amused as she spoke, "Why?"

Shrugging, (Y/N) pretended as if she wasn't intrigued at the info Sarah could share. "No reason really. Was it fun? With Harry and Mitch and all?"

"(Y/N)," Sarah sighed, her voice floating through a smile, "C'mon."

Stopping her distracting task, she turned to face Sarah who was looking at her with that knowing smile she somehow always had when it came to (Y/N)'s secrets. She was an open book as her friend could tell.

"What?" (Y/N) feigned nonchalance as if she hadn't already been caught.

"Did Harry say something? Is that why you're asking about all of this?" Sarah poked, her features set in a gentle tease.

Worrying her bottom lip between her teeth she canted her head, eyes dropping to where Sarah's hands had stalled her folding. "Not exactly," she started, "He just... I don't know, I called him the other night and he was with Mitch and they had been smoking, he told me. I know he's done it a few times since we started dating, but I've just been thinking about it since then."

Sarah hummed, nodding her head as she listened. "I get it," she said, "I know he doesn't do it around you or anything, right?" (Y/N) only shook her head. Popping her hip with a furrow appearing in her brow as she cast her mind back in search of answers for (Y/N)'s previous questions. "I wouldn't say it's exactly like the movies," Sarah continued, "But it depends on the person and the strain, and things like that. I usually get pretty tired and hungry, Mitch is like the movies sometimes—loud and everything is funny—, and Harry gets really lovey and lazy. None of us really make much sense, though."

(Y/N) tried to picture it. Lavender smoke in the air, Harry lazing about with hearts in his eyes, Mitch laughing about nothing, and Sarah passed out in the corner with a pillow under her cheek. A pinch appeared between her brows as she tried to see where she would sit amongst those characters.

"What do you think I'd be like?"

Blinking, Sarah brought her gaze to her friend. She pursed her lips as she took in (Y/N).

"I don't know. It's not the same as being drunk, so I don't know if you'd be as excitable." Sarah contemplated for a moment longer. "I don't really know, honestly. Are you thinking about finding out?"

She could only shrug. A similar anxiety she felt around alcohol before she broke that barrier still surrounded this, if even a bit heightened given the fact the substance was still very much taboo in her life. There were so many scary, over-exaggerated out there about marijuana, along with the fact that it was still very much taboo in (Y/N)'s life. The use of it seemed to be something that was only done in private and kept as a secret for some people. She was worried that if she found out why, she would regret it.

Though, there were those puffing thoughts in the back of her mind that begged to differ. It couldn't be that bad. Harry, Mitch, and Sarah were three of her favorite people in the whole world. They weren't devilish burnouts with a one-track lifestyle taking them down the drain, like horror stories and PSA's liked to project. They were good people who sometimes indulged in extra relaxation when they had the chance and the mindset to do so. There was nothing wrong with that.

"You could ask H, if you wanted. You know he'd answer anything you wanted to know."

"I know," (Y/N) drawled, unsure despite the fact she knew Sarah was telling the truth. "You don't think he'd be annoyed or anything? I know he keeps it all separate from me for a reason, so I don't want to make him upset."

Sarah leveled her gentle gaze on (Y/N)'s face. "I think he does it because he doesn't want to make you uncomfortable or anything. It's different than drinking wine with him and things like that, so I bet he just doesn't want to scare you."

(Y/N) shook her head, "He couldn't scare me, though. He's too nice."

"To you," Sarah clarified, her smile soft and teasing, "You know he just worries about you and all of that. You wouldn't upset him if you wanted to know more about anything he does."

He did love teaching and showing her things, she knew that.

"I'll think about it," (Y/N) settled.

"Good," Sarah smiled, grabbing her stacks of folded laundry, "Is dinner ready?"

"Almost," (Y/N) chirped, adding a little bit of extra seasoning to the pot, "I just need to add the noodles. It'll probably be ready by the time you're done putting everything away."

Sarah gave a small cheer, stacks of clothing now rehomed in the laundry basket to be returned to her room. "Thank you," she sung, "We should watch that yacht show when we sit down, don't you think?"

Perking up at the suggestion, (Y/N) quickly nodded her head. "That sounds perfect!" she smiled, mellowing some as she turned her attention to her swirling soup base, "And, thank you for answering everything, by the way. It always helps me."

"I know, that's why I do it," Sarah settled, reaching out to squeeze (Y/N)'s arm gently before she swept away.

Left in the silence of the kitchen with only the simmering soup, (Y/N) felt a little bit lighter. Some of her questions were answered even if she had more she wanted to hear from Harry directly. More than anything, she was a little enamored at the idea that Harry was loving and lazy under the influence. She already had a small idea given that she had seen how easy and bubbly he became when he drank, but she'd never seen him really slow down the way she pictured it in her head.

She wanted to see just how lovey he became, if she was being honest. She already had the privilege of experiencing the affectionate side of him, she wondered just how much higher that volume would be kicked to if he had been smoking. What if he really did have hearts in his eyes?

The thought brought a quiet smile to (Y/N)'s face.

Maybe, she really would have to ask him.

—————

"What are you thinking for dinner, my love?"

(Y/N) puckered her lips to reciprocate the small kiss Harry gave her as he traipsed by the couch. Her eyes followed the broad of his back as her made his way towards the kitchen. With her hands folded on the arm of the sofa, she rested her cheek on her forearm, kicking her legs up behind her as she watched him.

"Whatever you want, I'm okay with," she told him, voice soft and easy.

"Yeah?" he prodded, looking over his shoulder as he washed his hands in the sink, "Even if I didn't feel like making dinner tonight and decided to order sushi instead?"

"Sushi?" (Y/N) bubbled, "From the new place?"

Harry nodded, dimples thumbed into his cheeks. "I figured we could try it out tonight, if that was alright."

"Yes, please," she beamed, her grin only widening when came around to join her in the common area after drying his hands.

His lip ring bobbled as he matched her smile, using a gentle hand to push a stray strand of hair from her eyes. "Why don't you pull up the website for us while I put my sketches away, and find what y'like. Then we'll order, yeah?

Despite the long hours he worked at the shop this past weekend, he looked as gorgeous as ever to (Y/N). He lacked eyeliner after wiping it off as soon as he made it home, but his eyes were still the star of the show against his creamy skin. A fresh bee tattoo stood out on the column of his throat, the mosaic wings following the line of his jaw amongst the rose bush filler he had inked across the skin. With the way he stood over her, she got the perfect view of his spiraling curls and the cut planes of his face complete with his glimmering nose stud and lip ring.

She nodded her head in a lovey daze. "I can do that."

Amusement flickered in his eyes as he looked down at her. He dipped to her level to press a lingering kiss to the tip of her nose. "Thank you, baby," he murmured, moving away to gather the art supplies he was working with, "I'll be right back."

Pulling out her phone, (Y/N) searched up the restaurant up while her mind was still on Harry.

While the questions she had for him were still in the back of her mind, it was too easy to become distracted with him. They weren't apart for a long time by any stretch of the imagination, but even spending a long, four-day weekend away from one another allowed enough fondness to grow between them to keep her mind from wandering very far from what was right in front of her. Besides, Harry barely let her get a word in since she stepped foot in his home, having tugged her to his bedroom with his lips pressed to hers, only breaking for breath.

She'd ask him at some point, she was sure. If she had the mind to after dinner.

Browsing through the menu for a few minutes, (Y/N) found the rolls she was interested in, picking things she had a feeling Harry would like and finding other little gems on the website that she would mention in hopes of getting his opinion on. She searched through the site, trying to find an option to order online with no luck, the browser rerouting her to the main page every time she tried to plug into the ordering site.

"H?" she called, realizing he still hadn't come back from resetting his utensils.

"Yes?" he answered back, still in the bedroom, "What do y'need, love?"

Instead of responding, she stood from the couch and moved towards his room, brows knitted and phone screen bright in her hand. "The website isn't working—it won't let me order," she explained, stepping over the threshold to his room.

Lifting her head, she saw him standing at his dresser, back to the door with his head angled down and hands fiddling across the top of his dresser. He looked over his shoulder at her, his hands slowing.

"Give me a second, and I'll take a look," he told her, "I'm still cleaning up—forgot I left some things out."

"Oh?" she sounded, stepping towards him with her phone being slid back into her pocket, "Do you want any help?"

Growing close enough, she peered around him to see what he was working on. Instead of spotting the graphite and colored pencils she figured she'd find, she instead saw tiny green buds splaying across the wooden surface with a pair of loose pieces of thin paper and a tall black canister. Harry worked quickly to clean up the mess, majority of the green flakes having been scooped up and replaced in the container though he was struggling to wrangle the remains back into their container.

"'S alright," he murmured, shifting just enough to cut her view of the space, "'M almost done."

Rolling her lips between her teeth, she rocked on her heels as she stayed put. Before she could think better of her words, they were already spilling from her mouth:

"Is that weed?"

She cringed at the sound of her voice wrapping around something so outside of her vocabulary. It sounded better in her head.

Harry's hands slowed, stilling before he looked over his shoulder at her. A sliver of his workspace was once again revealed at the small shifting.

"What was that?" he pressed, his question seemingly heavy between the two of them.

She said the wrong thing, didn't she? (Y/N) dropped her gaze from his, settling on the new bumblebee on his neck instead.

"I ask if that was your... you know," she trailed off, hating the sound of her floundering almost more than just saying the word outright, "That's weed, right?"

Feeling Harry's gaze trail over her, (Y/N) tried not to squirm.

"It is, yeah," he muttered, "I didn't realize I left it out. 'M sorry."

Darting her eyes up to match his once more, she tipped her head to the side. "Why are you sorry?"

Turning away from the dresser entirely, Harry faced her directly. He gave her a small shrug. "I don't like leaving it out when you're here. I meant to clean it up before y'came over, but I forgot."

"You know I don't mind," she reminded him, "You don't have to be sorry."

A gentle smile curled his lips, only a single dimple in his cheeks as he looked at her.

"Thank you, love," he started, "Let me clean up, I'll wash m'hands again, and then I'll—"

"What does it feel like?"

(Y/N) could feel her skin simmering in embarrassment as her tumbling question fell from her mouth before she had a chance to police the words. Everything she had been too distracted to ask him came flooding back then, unable to be stopped now that she saw the opportunity.

"Sorry," she peeped, realizing how abruptly she had cut him off.

He waved her off, "'S alright." He watched her with attentive eyes, catching each of her expressions and minute movements. "What does what feel like?"

There was no going back now, she figured.

"Being high," she peeped, "What does it feel like?"

While he didn't seem to understand where her line of questioning was coming from, or understood her sudden curiosity in his private hobby, he didn't dissect any further.

Harry rolled his neck, pursing his lips. "It's different for everyone," he started, much the same as Sarah had, "It depends on the kind you smoke, too."

"But what does it feel like for you?" she rattled off, her words coming quick. Her hands were a busy bundle at her waistline, looking at him with curious eyes.

A small tug on the corner of his lip had a lopsided smile sparking on his mouth. "It depends, like I said, on what kind, but I usually like it best when m'hands hurt. It helps numb it long enough for the cramping to go away," he mused, "But, other than that, it makes me tired—but not enough to sleep. I jus' want to do nothing but sit and eat. I also get very touchy; lots of cuddling with pillows and whining about not being with you."

He had to have known that his last comment would get her lips splitting into a sheepish smile, (Y/N) dropping her head to fix her gaze at their feet. It was still a little wild to her that Harry thought about her as often as she did him, even when she wasn't right in front of him.

"You feel like that every time?"

"Mostly, yeah," he shared, "Sometimes I feel like sketching, or I fall asleep right away. Back when Mitch and I would go out a lot, I used to be really hyper—doing stupid shit because I wasn't afraid of anything. I've definitely calmed down since then."

"Oh," she sounded. (Y/N) couldn't imagine Harry being reckless, getting himself into trouble that way—but, this was the same man that apparently received his first tattoo at a mechanic's garage by a very amateur artist. He was capable of anything, she guessed.

"Why do you want to know, love?" he asked, tipping his head with a spiral of his curl falling over his shoulder.

She attempted to act as nonchalant as possible, giving a shrug of her shoulders despite her lips being rolled between her teeth. "I don't know," she answered, "I've just been thinking about it, I guess."

"Yeah? Is that all y'wanted to know?"

While there had to have been hundreds of questions that could come to mind, everything from what he and Sarah meant when they specified reactions were based on the strain or kind of weed that was being consumed, to what skunks vs. dank meant when it came to the herb, she didn't know where to start. Though there was one thing she was wanting to know, beyond just the details of what it would be like to see a clingy, lovey Harry.

"What do you think I'd be like?" she asked, her words coming out in a rush before she could rethink them.

Harry's gaze was warm on her face as he examined her. Amusement sparked in his eyes.

"I don't know, but I have a feeling you'd be a little bit like Mitch," he explained, "I think you'd be excited about everything. But, I'd hope you'd be a little like me just because I like the idea of you being clingy and warm, too."

She liked that idea, too. It was easier this time to add herself to the picture of Harry, Mitch, and Sarah, superimposing herself at Harry's side with her own hearts in her eyes and her hands tangled with his. (They could sneak kisses, too, if she caught the bug of no fear like he used to have).

"Could—Can I—... I think I want to try, if that's alright," she stuttered, unable to find the right words before just letting something roll off her tongue.

Harry's silence was heavy between them, the lilypad of his irises setting on her. "You want to try smoking?"

Starting with a soft nod, she tried to find that reckless bubbling that had carried her this far. "I think so, yeah." A beat passed. "If that's alright."

When he didn't immediately say anything, she chanced a peek up at him to find his eyes fixed on her, gentle and melting as he took her in. He opened his arms for her when he caught her eye, his features softened and warm. "C'mere."

(Y/N) all but fell into his arms, his chest warm and solid under her cheek. She looped her arms around his middle, her eyes fluttering closed as she relaxed into him. He worked like a shot of lavender incense and chamomile tea for her, the perfect thing to settle her in moments like these.

His hand spanned over the planes of her back, fingertips massaging the knots of muscle and ladder of her spine. He rubbed over her form in a soothing circuit between her shoulder blades, his opposing hand an anchoring weight on her waist.

"Y'really want to try it out, love?" he prodded her gently, his voice rumbling under her cheek.

"I think so," she mumbled, finding it easier to speak now that she was there to hold her instead of watch her.

"When did y'decide that?"

"The other day, I think," she explained, "After we talked on the phone."

He hummed, the sound reverberating in her ear. "What made y'think y'wanted to try something like this?"

Harry always liked to talk her through things like this, she found. It made it easier for him to understand her thought process, he'd said, helping him be honest with her if he worried she was making a choice that might hurt her later. He never lacked patience when it came to guiding her through new experiences.

"I don't know," she answered honestly, "I just want to know what it's really like. I've only seen a couple of movies and read a few books, but I want to know what it would feel like for me. I don't think it could be so bad if you like it."

Nosing at her hair, she could feel the smile that had spread across his lips. "'M not always the smartest though, baby. You know that."

She let out a small laugh at his griping. "I know, but I trust you. If you really don't think it would be good for me, I know you would tell me."

A pause settled between them.

"You don't feel like you have to, right? Jus' because 's something I do sometimes, I don't expect you to feel comfortable with it or want to do it with me."

"I know," she responded, voice resolute, "I just want to try it at least once. If I don't like it or anything like that, I won't do it again."

After a lingering moment, Harry drew her away from him, peering down at her with a soft gaze. "If you're sure, then we can try it whenever y'want. Jus' let me help you, and I'll be there."

An impulsive flicker lit through her system. She was on a roll, why stop now?

"Can we try it tonight?"

Harry looked at her with widened eyes. "Tonight?"

(Y/N) nodded her head. "I don't have class until the afternoon tomorrow," she started, a plan coming together, "Do you have to go in early tomorrow?"

His smile was lopsided as he shook his head, likely following where she was going with this. "No, I don't."

"We could stay up, then," she rattled off, "I could try tonight, and if anything goes wrong we can sleep in a little in the morning."

Amusement filtered through his gaze. "I didn't know we were having a sleepover," he teased her, dipping his head until his nose nudged against hers, "Y'want to stay the night with me, baby?"

Her skin hummed as (Y/N) fought the urge to hide herself in his neck. (She acted as if he hadn't been fingers deep in her just a few hours prior, their mouths welded together and her legs around his waist)."

"Harry," she whined, curling her fists in his t-shirt to keep from pulling away, "I'm trying to be serious."

"I know," he crooned, tipping his chin to peck a soft kiss to her pouted lips, "And, 'm listening. We can try it out tonight, if y'really want to. But, I think we should eat first, yeah?"

"Yeah," she repeated, giving a slight nod of her head, "I still need help with the website, though."

"Right," he murmured, pulling away, "Since I don't really need to clean up anymore, let me take a look."

With that, (Y/N) handed him her phone, telling him about the confusion she felt with the links and the rerouting and all, but her mind was somewhere else. Flicking her gaze around his shoulder, she saw the mess he was leaving out for them to take care of later. The small green buds sparked that familiar kind of nervous excitement that she'd grown accustomed to when it came to new things Harry was planning on teaching her.

She just hoped she didn't make a fool of herself.

—————

"What did you think, love? Good, right?"

Taking their dirty utensils—including the pink chopsticks he gifted her for Valentines—Harry spoke over his shoulder as he made his way to the kitchen.

(Y/N) sat pliantly on the couch, tummy full of the variety of sushi rolls they sampled for the night, along with a new favorite miso soup that she was surely going to be craving as the week went on. "So good. I think my favorite is still the spicy salmon one with that seaweed salad on top."

Harry laughed from where he stood, surely remembering the way she had practically taken that roll for herself, hoarding the pieces to allow only one bite for him. "I really liked that one, too. We'll have to go back again soon, yeah?"

"Yes, please," she chirped, looking over the back of the couch as he made his return.

While the food was a delicious distraction for the night, (Y/N) had still marinated in the idea of what would be coming once she finished and they were settling for the night. The mess he'd left on his dresser was waiting for them, loose papers and all.

"Ready?" he asked, coming to stand at the end of the sofa.

Was she? She wasn't sure, honestly. But that uncertainty was outweighed by the curiosity and bubbly jitters she had since Harry had agreed to help her.

Before she had a chance to answer and take his hand, Harry spoke up again, "Jus' to get ready for bed first, baby."

"Oh," she sounded, nothing more intelligent coming to mind at the moment, "Um, yeah. Then we'll...?"

He cracked a smile at her hesitancy to name the activity that she had brought up. "Yes, we'll do that afterwards. You'll probably feel more comfortable in some pajamas and your face clean."

Though she felt a bit silly at the way she had built up a moment that hadn't quite arrived yet, she understood his logic. Besides, if she turned out to be like Sarah, she wouldn't beat herself up in the morning if she did all of her skincare now, and not when she was already inches from sleep.

Taking Harry's hand, she followed after him as he led her to his bedroom, a small duffle bag of hers that stayed here was already sitting by the bathroom door. A change of clothes, and minis of her most essential skincare needs were packed away inside, making it easy for her to spend the night impulsively when she wanted to.

(Just then, the reminder that she wouldn't be confined to a single bag when they moved in together made her more giddy than before. Soon, she'd be sharing a whole closet with him, a bathroom, and a home. She couldn't wait).

(Y/N) went through the motions of getting unready with Harry standing behind her in the mirror. More often than not, as she brushed her teeth or patted a balm into her skin, her eyes wandered to his reflection. Once or twice, when she was caught, he gave her a sly smile with glimmering eyes. But, when he didn't catch her, his attention on his own task, she was left to allow her mind to gill with imagination.

She was reminded as she ran her eyes along the cut of his jaw, the plants of his features, and the high points in-between, that he would be stepping behind the lavender veil with her. His previous conversation with her had only revolved around her and what she wanted out of this experience, straying her mind away from the fact that he was going to be a part of the package.

What would he look like with smoke pluming from his mouth? Would his lilypad eyes go glazed and red? She wondered if his hands would feel any different gliding over her skin, if his lips would still feel as pillowy against hers.

The thought had her cheeks warming, a sheepish smile forming around the toothbrush between her lips.

Harry finished before her, stepping out of the bathroom to give her privacy to change into her pajamas. "I'll wait for you out here," he murmured, pressing a gentle kiss to the side of her head.

Closing the door behind himself, she was left alone with the chilled tile under her socked feet. Glancing at the mirror, (Y/N) found herself fresh-faced with wide eyes and a slight swell to her lips from the amount of times she rolled them between her teeth. Blinking, she wondered if she would look any different to Harry after she pulled the smoke into her lungs.

It was with rushed hands that she dressed into her sleep clothes (really nothing more than a pair of tiny shorts she would inevitably kick off in the night, and a shirt she had stolen so long ago from Harry that it was hers now), almost slipping her top on backwards before she righted herself in the mirror. Stepping out of the washroom with her laundry being dropped atop her duffle for later, (Y/N) saw Harry once again at his dresser.

This time, he looked to her with an easy smile, his hands working over the surface before him.

"Better?" he smiled, lip ring bobbing.

"Mhm," she hummed, moving towards him in slow strides, "What are you doing?"

Turning back to face his hands, he told her, "Jus' getting our things ready. Do you want to watch?"

A pinch creased her brows as she went towards him. Peering around his shoulder, she saw him working with one of the loose papers from before and a small pile of crushed up greenery.

"What do you have to do?" (Y/N) only had a vague idea of what all went into preparing for a session like this.

Smiling down at her, his ministrations slowed now that her attention was placed on his hands. He sidestepped just enough to allow her an unobstructed view of his work. "I figured we'd stick with a joint this first time, so I've got to roll one up for us to use."

Looking at it now, while she didn't have much knowledge of any of this, she could see familiar pieces forming. The paper would be rolled and twisted with the bud inside, Harry flickering a lighter at the end like a cigarette when it was ready.

"How do you do that?" she muttered, stepping that much closer, feeling as if she were a child pressing their nose against the glass separating them from gallons of ice cream.

A huffed laugh fell from his lips then. Lifting his arm up, he beckoned her to stand between his chest and the dresser. "C'mere."

Slipping into the small space he freed for her, the heat of his chest could be felt against her back. Though she caught whiffs of it before, now the herby, earthy smell of the bud was right at her nose, wafting through the air and clinging to her skin. Right in front of her, Harry worked around her, his fingers deftly working through his supplies.

"First," he started, "You've got to keep the paper flat out and put one of the filters at the end." She watched as he pulled a tiny white piece from the canister, setting it at the middle of one of the short ends of the paper. He kept it stable when he reached for the ground up weed that he had piled in the lid to the container, a small mound he pinched at before sprinkling the chunks in a line across the paper. "We've got to fill it up enough so there's not any air bubbles between," he explained as he worked, his arms hovering above her shoulders as he created their joint with the ease of experience. "This part’s always a little hard for me," he told her, to her surprise.

"What do you mean?" He could have fooled her.

"'S hard to pack it in like this," he elaborated, his voice dull as he concentrated, "M'fingers are too big, so I've got to be extra careful that I don't mess it up."

Honing her gaze in on his digits, she had to keep herself from tipping her head to the side and falling victim to the sight. She could see it then, she figured, watching as he tried to pat everything as tightly and precisely as possible. His fingers definitely were too big.

"Oh," she sounded.

A breathy laugh came from behind her, the exhale twisting through the hair on the top of her head. "Would y'do something for me, love?" he asked, finally packing enough in as tightly as he could before he started folding the ends of the thin paper.

She gave a nod, now too transfixed on his hands to speak with an even tone.

"Would you give this a lick for me?" he asked, "We've gotta seal it up before I can twist it all up."

"Like, the paper?" she clarified, eyeing the open flap he was presenting to her with the joint grasped carefully between his fingers.

Harry hummed a confirmation. "There's glue on this edge like an envelope. Gotta make it sticky, then I can close it up for us."

"Um, okay," she muttered, placing a steadying hand on his wrist as he brought the almost-joint to her lips.

Parting her mouth, she swiped the tip of her tongue along the very edge of the paper. It didn't taste quite as artificially sweet as a regular envelope, but then again, everything was coated in that dusky scent that the herb folded inside held.

"Thank you, baby," he told her, pulling the joint from her lips as he did the closing motion of sealing the edge to the roll. She watched as he did the final step, twisting down the free edge into a tight swirl before he presented it with the filtered end between his fingertips. "All done."

In front of (Y/N) was the stereotypical joint that she had seen in the few films that showed as much. The paper was translucent in the way that she could clearly see it was filled from the inside with dark, green flakes. The filtered edge was tapered down into a small funnel, leaving the head of the roll trumpeting out, thick with the ground up weed.

"That was fast," (Y/N) muttered, wanting to reach out and touch, but too scared.

"I've gotten pretty good, I can't lie," he joked with her, pressing his lips to the back of her head. A paused settled again before he spoke to her, his head still dipped down as he murmured, "Y'still feeling alright, darling? Still want to, or do y'want to go to bed and watch a movie instead?"

Examining the joint in front of her, the thick scent of the weed surrounding her with the heat of Harry's chest at her back, she nodded her head. "I still want to."

Dropping an arm to wrap around her waist from behind, Harry hugged her to him for a moment. "Grab a jacket then, and we'll go out back for a second, yeah?"

"Outside?" she asked, turning in his hold.

"Don't want it stinking up the house, right?" He looked at her with a raised brow, already stepping towards the closet in search of his own coat. "We'll be fast, baby, 's alright."

(Y/N) supposed he was onto something, realizing that she had never been struck by the heavy scent like she would figure if he had smoked in his bedroom. As long as no one complained, it wasn't a bad idea to head outback for a second. It would be nice to take in deep breaths in between the smoke too, she figured.

With a set of slippers on her feet, and a thick hoodie on her body, she followed Harry out the back door, ending on the back patio. He sat on the stoop at her feet, patting the space next to him.

"Warm enough?" he asked, moonlight waning above their heads.

Snuggling closer to his side, she nodded her head. "I'm alright, thank you. Are you warm?"

Despite the unzipped jacket on his form and the thin t-shirt underneath, Harry gave her a small smile. "'M good, baby."

Flicking out a lighter and the joint from his pocket, he sparked the flame with a flick of his fingers.

He ran the spark over the trumpeted tip of the joint, his face warming in the firelight glow. "We'll take it easy tonight, yeah?" he murmured, concentration on his hands, "I don't think it'll take much to get y'there, so we probably won't finish this but we'll save the rest for another time if you want."

She watched as he rotated the edge of the joint over the flame, evenly burning the tip. "Are you not going to have any?"

"I will," he assured her, "But, I want to make sure I can take care of you. I won't be having too much."

Having a deja vu moment, (Y/N) was reminded of how it felt to be sitting in his lap as he fed her wine, keeping his own head clear while he let her run wild.

With the end of the joint glowing a warm orange, Harry put the lighter away. He ashed the very tip away, revealing cool lavender smoke twisting through the air with a heady scent clinging to the particles.

"Want the first go?" he asked, tipping the roll towards her in an offer.

"No, no," she answered immediately, "You first."

His smile was lopsided as he agreed, pulling the joint to his mouth. She watched as he tucked the filtered end between his lips, taking in a shallow inhale with the fiery end glowing to life. His chest expanded as he inhaled. He only pulled the roll away from his lips when his chest was puffed with smoke, a lingering second passing before he exhaled, plumes of dancing smoke drifting through the air. The heavy, thick aroma of the weed surrounded them.

(Y/N) couldn't pull her eyes from him as the smoke seeped from between his lips, a thin, violet filter hazing his features. The moon above seemed to catch each particle, drowning the scene in cool toned shades, muted and closed.

She waited for something to change in the way he looked, the way he acted. When the only thing he did was turn to her with a blink, once again offering the joint to her for a try, she wasn't sure what she had expected.

"Do y'think y'can do that?"

Her brows creased. "Do what?"

Amusement molded his features as he tipped his chin towards his offering. "Taking a hit," he stated, "Inhaling, and everything."

"I-I think so," she answered, carefully pulling the roll from his fingers. She hesitated before taking it to her lips, nervous to replicate his actions while he watched. "Do you feel any different?"

His smile was warm as he shook his head. "No—probably won't be too different tonight. I've built my tolerance pretty high, so I'll be fine."

"Oh," she sounded, feeling the slightest bit disappointed knowing that she wouldn't get the full experience of seeing him for what he was under the influence. Maybe sometime she could convince him to let it go. Focusing back on the joint, she stared intensely at the thin ribbon of smoke falling from the tip. "How do I inhale?"

"Jus' breathe in, baby," Harry laughed, throwing an arm across her shoulders. He tucked her against his side, warming her through her layers. "Only take a little bit at a time, though. And, if y'need to cough, jus' let it happen. You'll be alright."

Though it was only a few tiny rules, it felt like so much to remember, to keep track of while she was trying something so foreign.

"Wh-What if I take too much?" she muttered, worrying now the longer that she let it keep burning. She hoped she wasn't wasting everything he'd done for her.

Harry paused, rolling her question around his head before answering. "You'll be alright," he assured her, "Jus' don't want you to take too much, or anything, that's all."

The idea of taking too much scared her more than the other rules. She didn't know what too much was; how would she know if there was too much in her lungs, how would she know if she needed to pull back?

"Can you help me?" she murmured, worry lacing through her tone.

"I can hold it for you if you want?" he offered, though his option didn't seem so concrete as she had hoped.

"You can't do more?"

A small silence sat between them when he didn't answer right away. She looked to him, finding him looking at the joint between her fingers with a contemplative crease between his brows.

"I might have an idea that we can try," he started, flicking his gaze to match hers. "Y'trust me, right?"

Her nod was immediate.

A small smile folded his lips as he took the joint from her hand. He brought the roll to his lips, taking in another deep inhale with his eyes fluttering as his chest expanded. The cherry brightened as he pulled in the smoke. As soon as he pulled it away from his mouth, he spoke to her in a muddled voice, a small streak of smoke escaping through his nose.

"C'mere."

(Y/N)'s eyes rounded out in confusion. She was already right here, right?

The arm Harry had thrown across her shoulders slithered around her form until his palm came to a cradle on her cheek. He pressed forward then, his lips parting just enough for (Y/N) to get the hint.

He wanted to kiss her.

Fluttering her eyelids to a close, she leaned forward in an attempt to meet him halfway. Harry, with his hand on her cheek, stopped her short, a small distance left between them.

With her eyes opening to slits, she found him looking to her with his own gaze trained on her lips. His tender hand on her cheek shifted until his thumb was resting in the full of her bottom lip. Tugging just slightly, he parted her pout into a small gape. Harry ripped his head, leaning just that much closer with his pursed lips.

(Y/N) held her breath, her own mouth parted open as she felt soft plumes of smoke fan over her lips. His lips just barely grazed her own, pressing against the soft pillows as the smoke ghosted over her tongue, heady and thick.

Pulling away just enough with smoke still twirling around his features, he told her, "Breathe in, baby."

His voice was still heavy in his throat, emulating the way he spoke in the morning. The detail gave (Y/N) something to focus on as she instinctually closed her mouth as if biting down, the smoke now contained to a thin veil between them. He kept his hand steady on her cheek as she inhaled the way she saw him do, her chest bloating as she filled her lungs with the gifted smoke.

While she didn't feel the burning in her chest that she thought would accompany the smoke, she instead felt a thick heat in the back of her throat. She tried to mimic what she had seen Harry do, keeping the smoke in her lungs for a moment before exhaling, but she couldn't keep up when she felt her eyes begin to water.

Unable to handle it much longer, (Y/N) released her breath in clumsy pants, embarrassed to be reacting so intensely right in Harry's face. Though, all he did was stay steady in his spot by her, thumbing at her chin and coaxing her through it.

Tipping her head down, she finally coughed into her sleeve, eyes watering as she went with his hand falling to the slope of her neck.

"'S alright, baby, jus' let it out," he murmured, his voice a gentle soothe, "You'll feel better in a second, love."

By the time she regained her breath, there was a slight glaze over the back of her throat—not quite a tingle, but not entirely normal. Harry tipped his head down by then, pressing a soft kiss to the corner of her mouth with his palm spanning the shelf of her collarbones.

"Y'alright?" he murmured, ever patient when he pulled away to match her eyes.

Nodding her head, (Y/N) swallowed around her odd throat. "Was that alright?" she croaked, wet bottom lashes grazing the height of her cheekbone.

A fond smile molded Harry's features into soft curves. "Y'did jus' fine, lovebug. So proud of you for not getting scared," he praised her, thumb running over her warm skin, "Feels a little weird doesn't it?"

(Y/N) didn't have to think before she nodded her head, watching as he ashed the joint they had probably let burn for just a touch too long. "Really weird," she told him earnestly, "My throat feels funny, but that's all so far."

"Yeah? Want to keep going?" His eyes skated over her features, taking in every reaction, every minute stretch of her muscles.

While she was sure there was something that would hit soon, she still felt comfortable enough to take a little more from him. (Y/N) answered with a small nod.

"Same way we did before?"

Remembering the feel of his lips glancing across hers, the faint brush of the tip of his nose over hers, she could feel her skin simmering. "Yeah," she answered, hoping he thought the breathy quality of her voice was a lingering side effect of her coughing.

He didn't look entirely fooled when that sly smile touched his lips. "Alright," he said, bringing the joint back up to his lips, "We'll do a couple more, then I think you're done, baby. That alright?"

"That's alright," she murmured, "Thank you."

This time, watching him taking in the long drag, (Y/N) knew what to expect when he turned to her. She allowed him to hover close enough that he was almost kissing her as he blew out another plume of smoke for her to inhale. When she took her time filling her lungs with the smoke, Harry tipped his head and smeared his lips over her cheek, kissing down her neck.

She had more confidence this go around, coaxing herself through as Harry held her. That thick feeling in the back of her throat intensified as she closed her eyes, her chest expanding under her borrowed hoodie.

"Doing good, baby," he murmured into her ear, pulling away to match her gaze, "Go ahead and breathe out, love. I think you're good."

Following his direction, the lavender smoke twirled between them. Sucking in clean air, she filtered out her lungs. This time around, opening up her eyes to look up at the moonlight and the stars blinking over the inky canvas, things felt different. There was a bit of lethargy to her movements, even in the darting of her gaze. Her limbs felt as if there was extra weight attached, something heavy that slowed her before she even had a chance to move.

It was an odd feeling, something that she'd never experienced before or had anything of comparison to, but it wasn't unpleasant. She'd even say she liked it so far.

Harry seemed to pick up on the fact that she was edging into new territory as he watched over her, eyes sparking from amusement. "One more?"

"Yeah," she settled, her lips feeling looser the more she sunk into the moment, "One more."

"Wanna try by yourself?" he asked, taking his own small puff from the joint before he was angling it towards her.

"Not by myself, no," she argued, still scared to be in charge of her own dosing.

"I can hold it for you if y'want—take it back when you've had enough," Harry offered, letting a cloud leave his lips as he spoke.

"Okay," she nodded, taking on his offer.

"Open," he instructed, setting the filter of the joint between her lips, "Then jus' suck in, okay? You'll be able to feel it in the back of your throat, so stop if you've had enough and I haven't taken it back yet."

(Y/N) wrapped her lips around the filter, taking in Harry's directions with absent ears. She couldn't imagine he wouldn't be able to catch herself and her intake before he did.

Emulating what she'd seen from him before, she sucked in, her cheeks hollowing just enough to show off the shape of her cheekbones. The back of her throat warmed, embers igniting in a low burn. This was more than what Harry had given her before, but she didn't mind. This would be just enough,she figured.

At the perfect moment, Harry pulled away prompting her to breathe out the final cloud of smoke. He asked the joint once more, a small pile of grey dust having collected at their feet.

A few huffed coughs fell from (Y/N)'s lips, unused to the feeling of gathering the smoke directly from the source. Harry wrapped his arm around her, tucking her into his side as she eased through the final intake.

"How do you feel?" he asked her, voice low under the moonlight.

Looking around, (Y/N) tried to find the answer to the question.

It was an odd feeling, she decided. She felt both light and heavy at the same time, her head in the clouds with her body entirely anchored to the ground. Prickles poked at her skin, her limbs their own entity as she brought her hands into a bundle in her lap.

There was no other way to describe it other than the fact that she felt high.

"Good," she answered simply, "Different."

"You'll get used to it, my love," he murmured into her ear, pressing a soft kiss to the space just before.

"Do you feel different?" she asked, her voice heavy in her dry throat.

"A little," Harry explained, stubbing out the cherry of the joint, "But, I think 's time we get inside before either of us freezes, don't you think?"

"Yeah, yes."

It was when Harry let out a small huffed laugh that (Y/N) couldn't contain her own laughter. A loud peal fell from her lips. She wasn't even sure why she was laughing. That only made her laugh harder.

—————

"That is so funny," (Y/N) giggled to herself, clenching her hands in the fabric of her top lest she forget they were there. "Harry, did you see that?! It was funny!"

He was back in the kitchen, working over the stove with a pot of noodles boiling away and a cheesey sauce working on the other burner, leaving (Y/N) to watch this movie all on her own.

"Which part, baby?" he asked, his rumbling voice sounding farther away than she remembered.

(Y/N) blinked, watching the brightly colored animated characters go across the television screen. "The one that was just on! With the cat on the piano!"

How could he not have been paying attention? (Y/N) had never seen something so entertaining before, if she was being honest. This had to be her new favorite movie—she just needed to remember what it was called.

"Oh," he sounded, "I did see that, sorry, lovebug. It was very funny."

"Good," she responded absently, craning her neck to look over the back of the couch towards where he stood in the kitchen, "I'm so hungry, H."

"I know," he laughed, looking at her with his skin seemingly glowing and the smile of a prince. "'M almost done, okay?"

"How close is ‘almost’?"

His smile only widened at her line of questioning. (Y/N) mimicked that look without a thought.

"About five minutes. Can you wait that long?"

"I'll try." She couldn't help the pout that took her features. She had told him she was hungry what felt like hours ago, and she still was waiting for food. He wouldn't even let her help either, but she could argue that she would have eaten already if he just let her follow him to the kitchen.

Raising his brows, Harry fixed his attention back on the television screen. "Oh, look. The little cat is back, baby."

(Y/N)'s attention took a one-eighty as she did the same to face the TV once more. Harry was right, the kitten was back on screen. She didn't want to miss this.

The high had hit her at full force only minutes after Harry had taken her inside, setting off a firing squad of so many different feelings (Y/N) had never experienced before. She had so much energy, but at the same time she wanted to sleep. She wanted to kiss and hold her boyfriend, but also had to make a point to remember where her limbs were. She wanted to eat and drink as much water as she could, but couldn't find the attention to do either of those things. In the back of her mind, she even debated on writing some for the course paper she needed to work on before the midterm exam next month—her mind swirling with ideas, but they were all out of order.

How she decided on watching a movie instead of any of her other raucous ideas, she wasn't sure, but she was happy with the choice. This way, she was able to wrap up in the soft pink throw blanket that she left in his bedroom, sink into the new feeling, and make out with Harry when he was done cooking.

(It had really been Harry's prompting and prodding that led her to the conclusion that yes, she wanted to watch a movie and cuddle up with him while she ate, but he was happy with letting her assume it had been her own choice).

Time moved in mysterious ways since the high had hit, making it hard to decipher if it had been five hours or mere five minutes before Harry came to her with bowls of pasta and a buttery warm sauce poured over top.

"That looks so good, H," she bubbled, overjoyed at the sight of food, "Thank you so much!"

"You're welcome, baby," he smiled, "Do you need more water?"

"No, just—Hold on." (Y/N) stumbled over her words, organizing her thoughts as steadily as she could and ultimately failing in favor of reaching towards Harry.

The second he settled into the cushion at her side, she had his jaw cradled in her palms, lips puckered and pressed against the corner of his mouth. A laugh bubbled through his lips, his smile felt under her kiss.

"I missed," she laughed along with him, pulling away to watch his eyes light up and creases form around his smile, "Sorry."

"'S alright," he beamed, cheeks still cradled in her palms, "Jus' slow down and try again."

Though she didn't exactly have the wherewithal to follow his directions, she definitely tried her best. This time, she felt as if she went slower as she leaned in, pressing her lips to Harry's. He reciprocated her affection in soft kisses, (Y/N) melting the longer she reveled in his touch.

Her skin practically sang everywhere he touched her, taking her back to her wonderings of if there would be something extra to their affection while under the influence. That prickling that she had felt in her limbs just when the smoke started taking effect, now only occurred when he ran his fingertips over her skin or held her hand in his. The buzzing made her smile into the kiss, the pinpoint tickling under her skin.

"What's got you so smiley, hm?" Harry asked against her mouth, pulling away despite the tender hold she had on his cheeks.

She beamed up at him with an easy grin, a rose colored glaze over her vision of him. "I just like touching you," she told him, "It tickles."

He raised his brows in reaction, biting back a smile. "It tickles?"

Watching the clear amusement on his face, (Y/N) couldn't help her own smile from turning into bubbling laughter. "Uh-huh," she barely answered, everything else dissolving around her laughter.

"Now, why are you laughing?"

Harry's investigation only proved to make the entire moment funnier to (Y/N) as she doubled over. Snuggling into his chest, she clung to him with her laughter muffled against his shoulder. "I don't know," she giggled, barely sure that the words even left her brain.

"Oh, lovebug," he crooned, wrapping his arms around her, "What am I going to do with you?"

A contented smile landed on (Y/N)'s features as she settled down. She burrowed against him, smushing her cheek on his shoulder and bundling her arms between their bodies. "Love me."

The tip of Harry's nose skimmed the top of her head. "I already do that," he told her, words fanning across the strands of hair crowning her.

"I love you too," (Y/N) answered simply.

The cryptic sense of time she held struck once again when Harry drew away from her. Her body had relaxed into his as if she had napped on him for hours, but she could have been nestled in his arms for a max of three minutes for all she knew.

"Are y'still hungry? Or do y'want me to save your noodles for later?"

With that, (Y/N) swore her mind had been blown. "You brought me food, I totally forgot!" Twirling too fast for her brain to keep up, she was almost dizzy by the time she saw the bowl of pasta Harry had set in front of her, complete with salty cheese layered on top just like she asked. "That looks so good, H! Thank you."

Harry gave her a small smile. "You're welcome, baby."

A minute sense of deja vu niggled in the back of her head for just a second, but (Y/N) chose to ignore it in favor of twirling her fork through the spaghetti noodles.

Had cheese always tasted this good?

—————

"Harry, are you listening? This song is beautiful."

"I know, love. 'S perfect, huh?"

The drawl of Harry's response had (Y/N) peeking up at him. She found him lying with his eyes closed, mouth parted in a small gape, though his hand on her back never slowed the soothing circle he had curated.

"Are you tired?" (Y/N) whispered.

A slight smile touched the corner of his mouth at her question. "A little. Are you?"

(Y/N) paused, evaluating herself to give him an honest answer. "Yeah. A little." His heartbeat was set to a soothing pace under her ear, slowing into a steady rhythm as if urging him to sleep. "Are you almost asleep?"

Though she could see his eyes were closed and his breathing was coming in soft puffs, Harry didn't slack on the duties he had taken on for the night. Since pulling her to bed and setting a playlist to softly sing through his bedroom, he had kept his cuddling hold on her firm and anchoring. He answered her every time she spoke to him and even crawled his way to the bedside table to skip the song whenever she started to whine over the melody.

"A little," he smiled, his voice a deep rumble, "Are you?"

Another pause. "Maybe," (Y/N) answered honestly. She could fall asleep right now if she wanted, but she also wanted to keep listening to music.

Harry hummed, his chest vibrating under her cheek. "Is there anything y'want before y'get sleepy? More water or a snack?"

What did she need before she could peacefully fall asleep?

Blinking her gaze up at him, she took in the tip of his nose, the curving pillow of his cupid's bow and the creamy texture of his skin.

"A kiss? Please?"

At that, Harry cracked his eyes open to peer down at her. "Y'haven't had enough of those yet?"

"Never," she answered, completely honest. Harry still plucked a smile onto his lips at her response.

"Can't blame you, darling—me neither."

Shifting between the sheets, Harry used his free hand to cup (Y/N) cheek and tip her chin as he dipped down. He sealed his lips over hers in a loving kiss, nothing more than a soft pressing of their lips. She swore she could feel every ridge, every dip, every plane of his touch, catalogued to her memory though she hoped she would recall it in less fuzzy detail.

"Love you," she murmured between breaths, immediately planting her lips across his once more.

Harry smiled into the contact. He broke the rhythm of her kisses even further when he drew away, ignoring the way she chased after him with a craned neck and puckered lips.

"I love you too, lovebug." His eyes scanned over her features not for the first time that night, though something softened in his gaze. "You had a good time tonight?"

Walking through the lavender veiled events, everything was just a bit hazy and herbal, (Y/N)'s smile only grew.

"Uh-huh," she beamed up at him, feeling herself settle into him that much more, "Thank you for showing me."

Thumbing at the height of her cheekbone, Harry surged forward to press a delicate kiss to the bridge of her nose. "'M happy y'feel good, darling. That's all I want when we try new things."

"I'm always happy when I'm with you."

(Y/N) blinked as she saw his face light up with a bubbly smile, creases appearing by his eyes, dimples thumbed into his cheeks, and a slight flush over his nose.

Had his smile always been that pretty?

—————

eeeek! so happy I could get a new aster blurb out for everyone this year! thank u sm for reading, sorry for any mistakes, and lmk if yu have any ideas for anything you'd like to see!

2K notes · View notes

ktgoodmorning · 1 month

Text

Silent Communications

(love language series- physical touch)

Mapi Leon x Reader

Inspired by the love language physical touch- The team doesn't know you and Mapi are dating and you struggle to keep it hidden throughout your away game travels

Words of affirmation felt too obvious of a choice for the Mapi fic. I swear that eventually I will manage to write something shorter and less fluffy but today is not that day. Anyways, I'd love any feedback or requests any one has, my inbox is always open.

The rest of the love language series:

Perfect. A.Bonmati x reader. Quality time.

Let me spoil you. C.Coll x reader. Giving and receiving gifts.

Broken. P.Guijarro. Acts of service.

You know I love you. A.Putellas. Words of Affirmation

Masterlist

The team was unaware of your relationship with Mapi. Everyone knew you had been best friends for most of your lives and attributed your closeness to that. They knew you tended to be touchy and cuddly together but still never thought much of it because the two of you had always been that way. It also helped your case being Spanish. They were completely unaware that your relationship had turned romantic. They’d occasionally tease you for your closeness, but it didn’t bother you. You knew they meant no harm and often you were willing to join in joking.

Eight months ago, you and your best friend confessed your feelings for each other. Growing up together, you had only become closer as you got older. It didn’t surprise you. From the time you were a teenager, you knew your feelings for Mapi were different. For a while you couldn’t pinpoint why, it wasn’t until teammates would tease you about how you were “basically dating” that you realized it was true. Or at least you wanted it to be true. You learned to ignore those feelings, trying to preserve your friendship. It was more important to you to keep her close than to act on your feelings. However things changed when you had caught on that she might be feeling the same way. You’d catch her staring at you, looking at you differently than she used to. She’d always be doing little things to help you out- bringing you coffee, carrying your bag for you, buying you dinner. There were little touches here and there that just felt different. It was always small things but felt so big.

The longer you noticed your best friend acting this way, the more it drove you crazy. One day when you were out to breakfast with Alexia, you decided to get her opinion on the matter. You were tired of trying to ignore your feelings. She knew Mapi just as well as you did, and you knew she’d be honest with you. When you asked her if she thought there was any chance of Mapi sharing your feelings, the older woman looked at you like you were crazy. “Isn’t it obvious?” she said. “I thought you already knew, that girl’s crazy about you.”

From then on, your world changed. You left your breakfast date with Alexia to go straight to Mapi’s house- a place that was basically your second home. The two of you had a long conversation, spilling your hearts out to each other. You discussed what you wanted to do, how to move forward. Ultimately you had both decided you wanted to try dating but planned to take things slow, making sure you weren’t doing anything that could risk your friendship in the process.

Things couldn’t have gone better. Your friendship transitioned seamlessly into dating. It was better than either of you could have imagined (and you both spent plenty of time imagining it). In the last eight months, you continued to grow closer in ways you hadn’t even known possible and were happier than you had ever been before.

You had decided not to tell anyone about your relationship. It just seemed easier that way. If people knew about your growing romance you’d have to deal with the media, the criticism of teammates dating, the fans, and any outside opinions that didn’t matter to you. Neither of you wanted any of that, you just wanted each other. You didn’t intend to keep it a secret for this long but somewhere along the way you became accustomed to it and it just felt easier than breaking the news.

A few of your closest friends, as well as each of your families, knew but that was it. It felt like it was only fair to tell Alexia since she had been the one to confirm Mapi’s feelings. Other than her, Patri and Pina were the only other ones on the team to know about your relationship. Before you had gotten better at sneaking around, they had walked in on you mid-makeout session on the middle of your couch. You had forgotten they were even coming over when you and Mapi had gotten a bit distracted. It’s safe to say, after that happened the pair of you were much more careful. Even though it wasn’t part of the plan, it was helpful having the three of them clued in. The group of five spent a fair amount of time together so not having to hide around them gave you a chance to relax.

Typically, you and Mapi were good at sneaking around. Because of how close you had been prior to dating, nobody questioned most of the things you did. As long as you weren’t outwardly kissing or saying anything too cheesy, nobody thought much of it. The only time things became harder was when you were traveling as a team. When you traveled, unless you got roomed together, there was no solace of coming back together when training was over and getting to spend time with just the two of you. It was almost harder when you were around each other so much yet never in the way you wanted.

You had been stuck on the bus far longer than you would've liked. Sometimes you were excited to join the other younger players, playing games and turning the bus ride into a social event. Today wasn't one of those days. You weren’t sure where it was you were even going to be playing, you just knew you were exhausted and cranky. You took a seat by yourself in the front, not really interacting with anyone. Mapi was with the much louder group having fun in the back. She could tell you were tired and wanted to give you some space to sleep. She also knew you enough to know that if you were in a bad mood you were going to be clingy and she didn’t want to accidentally let everyone in on your secret. When there was a lull in conversation, Lucy questioned your girlfriend, giving her a suggestive look, “Mapi, where’s your partner in crime? We don’t usually see you two apart.” It was clear Lucy was teasing but also was genuinely curious as to why you weren’t hanging out with them.

“She’s just taking a nap, probably trying to get away from you, idiota,” Mapi rolled her eyes, trying to cover up that she too was a bit concerned about you. It was unusual for you to isolate yourself. She sent you a quick text to check in with you but when she got no response, she decided she needed to come check on you herself.

When the defender stood up, she knew more quips were coming her way. “Ooooh Mapi? Gotta go check on your girlfriend?” The way Mariona sing-songed this made it clear she was joking but Mapi still couldn’t help but panic. She awkwardly laughed and turned away from the other girls, hoping to hide her blush. Patri and Pina shared a quick look as they knew the comment from Mariona would leave their friend panicking. They did everything they could to hold in their giggling while Alexia glared at them, hoping to make them stop. Nobody else seemed to notice this as they went back to their karaoke and left Mapi alone to join you.

You felt someone sit in the seat next to you, immediately recognizing the scent as your girlfriend. Your eyes were shut, trying to sleep, but failing. The side of her leg pressed up against yours and she gently placed her hand on your knee. It was clear to her that you weren’t asleep because of how much you were moving around, trying to get comfortable. “Hey,” she spoke gently, rubbing her thumb against your knee to get your attention. You slowly opened your eyes and Mapi greeted you with a soft smile. “You okay? You don’t seem like yourself.” she spoke softly, voice full of worry.

You nodded, “yeah, just tired. I didn’t sleep very well last night so I was hoping to sleep on the bus.” You rubbed at your eyes, starting to accept that it wasn’t going to happen.

“Here I’ll stay with you,” you couldn’t help but be grateful at the offer.

Still, you tried to protest, “Maps, no. Go have fun with your friends, I know you like to keep busy on the bus. I’ll be okay.”

The look on your girlfriend’s face made it clear she’d be staying by your side, “Hmm no thanks. We’ll put some headphones on, you can snuggle up against me, it’ll be great. It’ll put you to sleep in no time,” the way she spoke made it clear it was a statement, not a question. It’s not like you would complain, it did sound pretty great. She took your silence as agreement and pulled out her headphones, passing one to you. By the time you had put it in, she had put on a playlist that the two of you had made together. Her arm wrapped around you so you could place your head on her shoulder and use her as a pillow. You couldn’t believe how quickly you fell asleep. Mapi had that effect on you, always putting you at ease.

At some point, your girlfriend had also drifted off. You woke up, still snuggled into her, with her head resting on top of yours, her one arm still around you, and her free hand interlocking yours. This was by far the most comfortable you’d ever been on the bus. You carefully grabbed your phone so as to not wake up Mapi. You had some texts in your group chat with you, Mapi, Alexia, Patri, and Pina. First was a picture from Patri taken from the back of the bus where you could see the tops of your heads lying against each other, you shared earphones hanging between you. It was followed by a text from Pina, “better be careful if you want everyone to keep thinking you’re ‘just friends’ ;) “. You smiled to yourself, knowing she was right, but being too happy right now to care. All you could do was close your eyes and drift back to sleep.

When you eventually got to your hotel and got off the bus, the two of you seemed to be the hot topic of discussion. Everyone was teasing you, first for Mapi giving up her precious social time for you, then for how closely the two of you had cuddled up, and finally for the way your hands remained interlocked as Mapi led you off the bus and into the hotel lobby.

The only downside to Alexia knowing about your relationship was that she knew better than to let you two be roommates on trips like this. You were paired up with Bruna which you really couldn’t complain about, and Mapi got paired with Mariona. With neither of your roommates knowing about your relationship, finding time alone together was about to get much more difficult.

At breakfast the next morning, you went to sit down next to your girlfriend. She stood up to greet you with a hug and a soft kiss on the top of your head. It was likely a bit too long of a hug to be considered friendly but somehow no one commented. Alexia just shook her head, smirking to herself at how obvious you were being. Sitting down at their table, you tried to leave space between you while you ate so as to not raise suspicion, but you should’ve known that it wouldn’t work. Mapi always had to have a hand on you in some way. It was usually subtle, but it sure didn’t make hiding things any easier. You appreciated it though. You liked how she could be talking to anyone and you still knew she was thinking of you. That’s what was happening now as she settled into conversation with Alexia. The silent communication between your touches was better than any words could express.

Your next chance you got to be together wasn’t until after training, back at the hotel. Patri and Pina invited you both to come hang out in their room with them. That’s how you found yourself, laying against Mapi’s chest while she and Patri played FIFA. Her arms wrapped around you tightly while she held her controller in front of you. “Ay, (y/n), did you only come over so you could have time to be all cuddly without the rest of the team around?” Pina quipped at you while you both continued to watch the game, she was somehow both joking and also entirely serious.

Before you could respond, your girlfriend spoke up for you, “hey just be happy this is all we’re doing. We could be making out right now if we wanted to.” She somehow managed to hold you tightly while still playing a close game with Patri. You giggled at how she kept moving under you the more involved in the game she got. “Amor sit still! You’re blocking the screen!” Mapi whined at you, only making you giggle more at how quickly her tone changed. You ended up moving further down to cuddle into her leg so that she could still see. She shot you a glance to make sure you knew she wasn’t actually annoyed with you but relaxed when she saw your soft smile. “Comfortable?” she chuckled lightly at how you burrowed into the side of her leg.

“Did you really have to ask, amor?” you smiled at her before turning back to watch the game she was playing.

All of the sudden you heard the sound of the door opening, making you jump. However when you saw Alexia’s blonde hair round the corner, you quickly relaxed again. “Ooh the lovebirds are here, are you guys just here so you can makeout?” She shot you a smile knowing that you two would always spare them from seeing you be too handsy.

You rolled your eyes playfully at your captain, “you guys always say that but we’ve really only made out in front of you once and it wasn’t even on purpose. And you weren’t even there, Ale!” You sat up a little more so you could see her face.

“Gracias a Dios!” the blonde shot back at you, mirroring your smile.

Deciding to have some fun with this while also taking advantage of this limited time to show affection, you decided to try something. “You know, Ale, if you wanted us to be like that, all you had to do was ask. We sure can…” As you said this, you moved back up in Mapi’s lap and started to slowly leave kisses along the side of her neck. You didn’t want to distract her too much from her game but you also knew how much she’d be enjoying it. Plus you loved a chance to annoy your friends. This time, it was Alexia who started the retching noises. You felt your girlfriend tilt her head to the side to give you more room to continue down her throat, clearly having fun with this. Pina quickly joined in the sound effects when she saw that you weren’t planning on stopping. Finally Patri wanted to know what was going on and took a quick look over at you. Of course she had no choice but to join her friends in their shouting.

What you hadn’t planned on was that the whole scene had distracted Patri just enough to allow your girlfriend the opening she needed to win their game. “Yes!! I won!” You broke apart from her throat as she suddenly shouted. The two of you high fived and shared a real kiss in celebration of your unplanned teamwork. Everyone else in the room just groaned at the two of you, Patri flopping back onto her bed, cursing in Spanish in protest of her loss. You just settled back into Mapi, sharing a couple more short pecks as you did so.

The next day was your match. When you did your morning walk as a team, nobody seemed to notice the way you and Mapi had linked pinky fingers as you went. You wanted to be close and to spend it with her but you knew that holding hands on your team walk would be too much. The pinkies worked perfectly because nobody else could see it past the long sleeves of your jackets.

The match didn’t go as easily as everyone hoped it would. The score was tied 1-1. Barcelona had been winning most of the game but around minute 75, the other team equalized and both teams had been fighting hard for a winning goal ever since. Exhausted was an understatement. You and Mapi were both starters and were in the entire game. All that was on your mind was scoring. You had to. It was 2 minutes into injury time when Aitana made eye contact with you. She was running the ball up the field and you could tell exactly what her plan was as she did so. She slotted the ball through three defenders and directly to your feet. With one touch you sent the ball sailing past the keeper and into the back of the net. The crowd erupted and before you even had time to process, Mapi had run straight to you, beating everyone else as they all headed your way. Immediately Mapi scooped you into her arms, picking you up as she hugged you in celebration. You knew your other teammates had also surrounded you, but to you, it felt like just you and your girlfriend, alone in the middle of the pitch. She continued to hold you up, kissing your cheeks repeatedly. Your other teammates almost got bored of trying to celebrate you because of how much Mapi was keeping you to herself as the game wrapped up. You all made your way around the pitch to thank the fans, while your girl kept you at arms reach, overwhelmed with pride for you.

The two of you were the last ones to enter the changing room, walking hand in hand pulled into her side. Lucy noticed this immediately and couldn’t help but comment, “Jesus, Mapi are you ever gonna share her with us?” You could already see your girlfriend starting to blush as you made eye contact. “Do we get to celebrate with her at all tonight or is she all yours?” The rest of the room laughed and added their own comments but you and Mapi were lost in each other’s stare, having a silent conversation among yourselves.

You gave her hand a tight squeeze, encouraging her to do what you knew you were both thinking. “Alright you caught us,” the defendender sighed, “we’ve been dating for almost eight months now.” You held up your joined hands as if it were proof to show everyone (not that anyone needed it at this point). The room immediately interrupted into cheers. Of course it did, everyone knew how perfect you were for each other. If you had been best friends almost your entire lives, of course you’d make a great couple too. You and Mapi just smiled at each other, giving her hand another squeeze, trying to communicate that this was the right move. You didn’t even notice everyone around you until you were tackled into a group hug with you two at the center of it. It was exactly where you wanted to be- holding onto your girlfriend tight while all your best friends piled in around you, celebrating your love. It was everything you could ever imagine. Mapi was everything you could ever imagine.

The rest of the love language series:

Perfect. A.Bonmati x reader. Quality time.

Let me spoil you. C.Coll x reader. Giving and receiving gifts.

Broken. P.Guijarro. Acts of service.

You know I love you. A.Putellas. Words of Affirmation

Masterlist

Feedback and requests are always welcome! :)

#barca femeni #barcelona femeni #woso imagines #fcb femini #woso one shot #woso #espwnt #mapi leon #espwnt x reader #woso x reader #woso imagine #mapi leon imagine #mapi león #mapi leon x reader #maria leon #wosoreading24/7 #wosoreadingmapi

496 notes · View notes

flawless-peach · 1 month

Text

change your life ✨️

feel free to join me in this. I'm going to try to post every day about how I did <3

- get at least 7 consecutive hours of sleep. I've found if I go to sleep and then wake up back for a couple hours and then finish the 8 hours I feel I incredibly unrested. I keep myself accountable by using pokemon sleep which has a great alarm, so I'm looking forward to trying this instead

- read or listen to an audiobook for 30 minutes. literacy is a muscle, and using it is important, but sometimes I can't just sit down and read a book, and audiobooks are great for when I'm cleaning or cooking or folding laundry

- get sun daily. humans are a lot more like plants than you would think and so it is important to get some sun, even when it's a wintery sun that's cold or when it's a blazing furnace. Since I have some mental health issues and am unable to go outside im going to at least open my curtains, and if possible, crack a window to get some fresh air

- start a hobby you can enjoy. this one can be difficult because a lot of things require some sort of financial investment. for me, my hobbies for these six months is going to be writing and annotating books. but being creative is great for the human mind.

- learn to be comfortable alone. honestly this one will be difficult. personally, I live in a studio. privacy is nothing i experience, butthe little moments where you find yourself escaping with TV playing or music pause it and sit with yourself, how else can you learn to love someone if you avoid them 🥰

- meditate daily. this will be something I struggle with so much, but I'm going to try in the mornings since that's my peak time <3 and that's when I plan on doing a yoga flow during the sunrise

- eat healthy nutritious food. I hate cooking and I hate eating. having autism can make these really difficult for me to do, but I'm really really trying. I started the week before last to work on figuring out what snack foods I can prep, and now i just need to work on planning out some meals.

- positive affirmations everyday. I really struggle to have positive self talk because it feels so awkward and uncomfortable because I've been pessimistic for so long, but I want to change that ^^

- reduce screen time. this is going to be specifically targetting mindless scrolling for me. I have a tiktok account that I use for motivation, same with my tumblr account, and I also read on my phone and use my sleep app that I need to keep open at night.

- practice gratitude. my goal is to at night reflect on the day to try and find the good. I already reflect on my days and pick a mood, but I want to create lists of things i am grateful for, especially while I'm in between jobs.

#aesthetic #clean girl #motivation #vanilla girl #photo collection #routine #self care aesthetic #self healing #self improvement #self impowerment #self love #peachy days #that girl

462 notes · View notes

monzabee · 11 months

Text

the name game – cl16

masterlist

Summary: The one where you and Charles try to get through one of the first hardships of parenthood.

Pairing: charles leclerc x reader

Word Count: 2.8k

Warnings: pregnancy (and pregnancy symptoms), crying, angst but also tooth rotting fluff

Request: “Can I request Charles and his girlfriend or fiancé having a baby? And they are talking about names and she suggest her ex boyfriends name to piss him off and he gets really upset and mad. And they then tlak about last names and she tells him she wants their baby to have her name and he is not happy about that or hyphenating as he feels strongly about his family name”

Author’s Note: hi, hey, hello!! i’m so happy to be back after a month of exams, and what better way to kick it off with a charles fic?? the whole concept was extremely cute and i loved it so much, but i kind of wanted there to be a chaotic aspect to it?? thank you anon for your request, and i hope you guys enjoy this one! good morning, noon or night wherever you are, xoxobee

Please also note that all of my works are protected under copyright, and not available for reposting on other platforms.

Some people keep saying that the hardest part of pregnancy is the first trimester, some say that the hardest part is actually giving birth because, well – it’s quite literally pushing a baby from right there. But to you, the hardest part is not the nausea, or the possible pain of giving birth, or the sleepless nights to come, no. To you, the hardest part is deciding on what to name your baby. Everyone around you seems to have an opinion on what to name the baby, of course, and with the increasing amount of (sometimes uncalled) suggestions coming from you from all around, you and Charles find yourselves in the middle of a never ending game of name the baby.

“Alfred?” Charles suggests, raising his head from his phone.

The suggestion gets a groan, you shake your head to let him know that it’s definitely not the name. “Excuse me, are we about to raise Batman’s butler?”

“Good point,” he nods his head, “we are Marvel people anyway.”

“You guys are useless at this, you know that right?” Arthur scoffs, raising an eyebrow at the two of you. “Why don’t you wait until the baby is actually born? Many people say that it’s easier to name a baby that way.”

“And how do you know these people?” Charles asks, eyes narrowing at the edges.

Arthur raises his hands on the either side of his face in mock surrender. “Touché.” He takes a moment to think, “Why do you only looking at boy’s names? I thought you didn’t want to learn the gender until the birth.”

“We don’t,” you affirm, slowly perching yourself on the barstool next to Charles, “Charles just thinks that it’s going to be a boy.”

Arthur watches as his older brother nods while smiling proudly, then shares a look with you which screams, He knows there’s a fifty-percent chance, right? You shake your head as you shrug, turning your attention back to your phone. “Oh, oh! What about Luka?”

“Luka,” Charles repeats, and tests the name coming out of his lips, “Luka Leclerc?” His watches as you give him a bright smile as you nod repeatedly.

“It does have a nice ring to it,” Arthur comments from his place on the couch as he abandons the book filled with baby names in his hands.

“Luka.” Charles repeats the name again, but as he looks into your expectant eyes, he can feel a nudging at the back of his mind. Luka, Luka, Luka – has he met someone with the same name before? Well, probably, he thinks. He does meet a lot of people during his day to day life, not to mention the race weekends. He decides to let go of the worry, establishing in his mind that he probably met a fan with the same name– “No, chérie! We can’t use Luka!”

“What?” You ask him with a small pout on your lips, “Why not?”

“You dated a guy named Luka, remember?” He reminds you, expecting you to catch onto what he’s saying. “Chérie, it was right before we dated!” You look at him in confusion as you try to piece what he’s saying together, but Charles just looks at you in disbelief, “I can’t believe you want to name our baby after a guy you dated!”

“But–” You start, eyebrows furrowing together as you try and make yourself remember. “That can’t be true.”

“I’m telling you,” Charles turns to Arthur, raises his eyebrows as he looks at his brother for support, “Arthur tell her that I’m correct.”

Arthur chooses to throw him the pillow he takes from behind him. “How should I know the guy she dated before you, you idiot?”

“Would it kill you to be on my side for a change?” Charles deadpans.

You tune out the rest of their argument, still trying to remember whether Charles is actually correct or not – the pregnancy hormones definitely not helping you on your case. “Wait!” You exclaim, making both of the brothers to turn towards you. “I never dated a guy named Luka,” you raise a finger towards Charles to shut him up before he even gets a chance to speak, “let me rephrase that. I never dated a guy named Luka, because the last guy I went on a date with before we got together was Lucas.”

Charles’ voice is tentative as he asks “Lucas?”

“Yes, you idiot.” You roll your eyes at him, “Why would I try to name our baby after a guy I went on one date with?”

Arthur nods in support of you, “You have to admit you overreacted, Charles.”

“Okay, you? You zip it.” Charles snaps at his brother and then turns to you. “I’m sorry, chérie, but I thought it was Luka.”

“Well it wasn’t,” you cross your arms over your chest, “and don’t tell your brother to zip it, he’s right!” You let out a chuckle as you share a look with Arthur as Charles watches the both of you let out chuckles at his expense.

He lets his eyes narrow and he silently watches as the two of you make fun of him for his outburst. He only talks when your laughter is dying down, “Are you guys done?”

“Oh come on, darling, it was cute.” You lean towards him to link your fingers between his.

He raises one of his eyebrows as he asks, “So you wouldn’t react the same way if I just did that?”

“Oh, Charles, don’t–” Arthur warns him, but you quickly stop him.

“No, no,” you bite back a smile, “continue, my love.”

“As I was saying,” Charles gives his brother a pointed look and then turns his attention back to you, “you wouldn’t react the same way if I wanted to name our future child ‘Charlotte’?”

“Excuse me?” You stutter, frowning as your expression turns into a pout. You wait for a moment for Charles to realise what he’s just said, but when he fails to do so, you prompt him by asking, “How is that similar to what just happened? And why would you bring her into this in the first place?”

Charles shakes his head in disbelief, “How is it not?”

Arthur gets up from his place on the couch and pretends to yawn as he stretches his arms over his head, “You know what, I’m feeling kinda tired maybe I should go home.”

“You sit right back down on that couch, Arthur Leclerc.” You point a finger at him despite having your attention solely focused on your fiancé sitting in front of you, and not on the poor boy who tried to get away from the inevitable fight you and Charles are going to get into.

He lets himself fall back on the couch as he groans and presses a pillow over his face as he mumbles, “Here we go again.”

“I hope you know that these two situations are not similar to each other – like at all.” You emphasise for Charles, “I can’t believe you would even say that!”

There is a clear look of bewilderment in Charles’ eyes as he asks, “You dated ‘Lucas’, I dated Charlotte, how is it not the same?”

“I went on one date with the guy, didn’t date him for three whole years, that’s not the same, you idiot!” You exclaim as you quickly press your hand against your chest as you glare at Charles. “I can’t believe you couldn’t see that, God, Charles! You do this, you always do this!”

Maybe under different circumstances, Charles would have acted a bit smarter. He is, after all, a smart man, he prides himself of being one, but being the absolutely stupid man he is, he asks, “Do what?”

Arthur turns back from the couch, almost breaking his back in the process as his eyes widen in shock as well as he gives his brother a look which screams, How more stupid can you be, you dumbass? In an attempt to diffuse the tension, which is building between the two of you, he recommends, “How about we focus something other than the baby’s name, like the theme of the nursery?”

“Fairy tales,” you answer at the same time Charles chimes, “Racing cars.”

“Okay I take that back.” Arthur mumbles as he watches you and Charles throw glares at each other. “Let’s just stop talking about the baby? It’s clear that the two of you are set on having all the fights you didn’t have before deciding to have a baby.”

Charles lets out a supportive sound. “We clearly suck at discussion right now, this is starting to turn into the argument we had about you taking my surname.”

“Are- are you serious right now?” You stutter once again, eyes widened with surprise. “You are so obstinate, Charles! You refuse to see the right when you’re in the wrong and you refuse to compromise!” You voice is coming more of as a groan now that he’s opened that door. “We didn’t need to have that argument, because i’ve been telling you that I am hyphenating my surname.”

He lets out a similar groan, as he tries to reason, “I just don’t understand why–”

“So our children can have your name, but they can’t have mine?” You raise an eyebrow in warning, eyes narrowing on the edges as you look at your fiancé with suspicion.

“No,” he retorts, trying to defend himself, “I never said I didn’t want the baby, or our future children, to have your surname, I said I just wanted them to have mine.”

You let out a humourless laugh at his reasoning, “So I’m just supposed to lose a big part of myself when we get married, is that it?”

Charles immediately feels a wave of guilt wash over him as he realizes the impact of his words. He jumps up from his seat and rushes over to you, kneeling down in front of you as he gently takes your hands in his. “Well, no– I didn’t mean it like that–”

“I think I know what you’ve meant, Charles.” You voice is shaky as you mumble the next words, “Can you just help me get up, please?”

“What?” Charles asks, motioning his brother to stand back. “Why?”

“Because I can’t stand up on my own, I’m six-months pregnant!” You exclaim, the tears finally start falling down your cheeks. “And it’s all because of you!”

In hindsight, Charles should’ve foreseen the way his words would cause such a commotion in your relationship – given the fact that the two of you have talked about it before. As the weight of his insensitivity settles in, a new wave of panic washes over Charles – he just couldn't shake the thought that his thoughtless words might push you away. And he knows he should’ve listened to Arthur’s warnings before, and probably should have used better words to express his feelings instead of saying things he didn’t mean in the first place; but then again, he’s never been too good at it in the first place. After receiving a very lengthy lecture from Arthur what to say, or rather what not to say, to a hormonal pregnant woman, he left the apartment the two of you share in a hurry to find you. Despite the logical side of his brain constantly remind him of the fact that you know the city well enough to not get lost, the nagging voice at the back of his mind reminded him of the worst things that could have happened both to the love his life and his baby. So imagine his frustration when you don’t answer any of his calls as he frantically rides around the city in hopes of finding you and apologising like he should’ve before you got out of the door.

After dialling your number for the umpteenth time that night, he releases a relaxed breath when you finally answer his call. “Mon amour, I am so sorry, I didn’t mean–”

“Charles?” He hears your voice play through the car play speakers, “Oh, Charles, I did something bad.”

“Y/N.” Charles can swear his heart stops for a moment, he pulls the car over quickly to give you his undivided attention. “Talk to me, love, what’s wrong? Where are you?”

“I didn’t mean to do it, it was an accident–”

“Chérie, please tell me what happened.” He pleads, hands gripping the steering wheel tighter with anxiety. “Where are you? I’ll come to get you.”

He hears you take a shaky breath as you mumble your next words, “I accidentally ordered both raspberry and lemon ice cream, and I can’t finish both.”

“I- darling,” Charles lets out another relieved breath, “I’m coming to get you now, okay? Just wait for me.”

Your voice is sheepish as you mumble, but the small sniffle Charles hears through the speakers is enough to make his heart clench. “Okay, can you please bring me my blanket?”

“Of course I will, just stay there okay?” He mumbles as he starts up the car again, “I love you.”

“Thank you, darling, I love you too.”

Some of the anxiety he has been feeling about your brief disappearance ease with the enlightment as Charles begins to drive towards the small ice cream parlour near your apartment. Of course, you were right around the corner when he was looking for you throughout the entire city; and of course, he should have known you’d crave ice cream after eight o’clock. Thankfully, it doesn’t take him long to get to you, and he remembers to grab the blanked you keep in the car for when you get cold during night drive the two of you go on frequently.

He finds you sitting at one of the tables right near the door, sitting by yourself as you eye the cup in front of you with a small pout on your face. “Chérie.”

“Charles.” You mumble, meeting his eyes as you exhale a deep breath. “You found me.”

“Well to be fair, love, you’re right around the corner from our home.” He drapes the blanked across your shoulders before settling next to you. A small smile forms of his face when you push the small cup towards him. “You got lemon ice cream?”

You sigh sadly as you wrap the blanket around you tighter, “I couldn’t get far because the baby wouldn’t let me, and she wanted ice cream – and it’s habit, Leclerc.” You scowl at him, quickly adding, “I’m still mad at you.” You let out a frustrated groan when you find him smirking covertly, “What?”

“You called the baby a ‘she’.” He points out, grabbing the spoon and getting some of the ice cream on his spoon, “You think it’s going to be a girl.”

“I- I- no!” You gasp as you watch him bring the spoon to his mount and gives you a dimpled smile, “You stop that right now, Charles Marc Hervé Perceval Leclerc!” You reach over to hit his arm lightly, “I’m still very much mad at you.”

“I know,” he responds grimly, “we have to talk about what happened.” He laces his fingers against yours as he takes your hand on his arm in his, “I didn’t mean anything I said, I am so sorry.”

You let out a deep sigh, eyes softening around the edges, “I need you to understand that I don’t want to lose a part of myself just because we are getting married and starting a family, Charles.” You shake your head lightly as you give him a sad smile, “Do you know how it makes me feel when you say that you want our children to have only your surname?”

“I do.” Charles replies, but after receiving the look from you, he adds, “I mean – I do, now.”

“Charles,” you begin, “I love you, and I love that we get to go on this journey together, but I am not giving up my name. And I want our children to have both of our names.”

“I’m sorry, chérie, I don’t know why I said that.” Charles looks at you with a sad look.

“Your feelings are important to me,” you tell him, “I need you to know that.”

His eyes widen in surprise, “I know that, oh God. I do know that, Y/N.” He presses a small kiss to your conjoined hands, “And you have to admit, love, Y/N-Leclerc sounds great.”

“Thank you,” you let out breathily, eyes brimming with tears, “I love you.”

“I love you too, chérie.” Charles’ smile turns into a mischievous one, “So you think the baby is going to be a girl?”

“Shut up, Perceval.” You bite back a smile as you bring your hands on your belly, “I just hope she has your dimples and not your anger threshold.”

#monzabee #requests open #f1 fic #f1 fanfic #f1 smut #formula 1 #fanfic #f1 x reader #f1 x you #f1 x y/n #charles leclerc #charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc imagine #imagine #fluff #angst #smut #charles leclerc smut #charles leclerc fluff

2K notes · View notes

saturnianautist · 9 months

Text

Astro Notes pt. 4

Disclaimer: not a professional so take with a grain of salt but I do my best to use my discernment and base them off of my experience with multiple people and seek out patterns.

Note for you guys: currently working on the 8th house stellium in the signs post but it might take me a little while since I’m the only one I know with one so just piecing together my research for the other signs, thanks for your patience! <33

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

🧚 Gemini placements/Gemini stellium/mercury in Gemini are prone to talking with their hands a lot or can be one of the main ways they express themselves. If you’ve seen Aurora the artist sing live before, she’s a really good example of this and she has a mercury stellium, one of those placements being mercury in Gemini. Her chart ruler is also Venus in Gemini.

🧚 Not so much of an Astro note but just something I noticed. If you’re favorite artists or the artists that you really relate to or feel on a deeper level in their music doesn’t have the same moon sign as you they might have the opposite sign of your moon sign. Also check the degree on theirs and yours bc it could correlate as well.

🧚 I noticed that all of the people I’ve known with more severe lactose intolerance have either had cancer placements or the moons influence in their chart.

🧚 From my experience if you have Virgo and Leo influence in one chart you most likely are an acts of service and words of affirmation girly.

🧚 Neptune in the first house might take a while to find themselves (Neptune=confusion, distance) depending on the other placements in the chart they might already know who they are or have an identity but they are easily thrown off track from it or forget who they are/lose themselves until they manage to establish strong boundaries.

🧚 Whatever is aspecting your north node might tell you one of the things you’re meant to do in this life. for example, north node-mercury might be meant to use their voices, thoughts or expressions in some way. The houses, sign, and degrees might tell you more specifically how this might manifest. Beyoncé’s mars In Leo is conjunct her north node at 29 degrees (the degree for long term fame) Mars in leo is a natural performer and Beyoncé is known for being an all around performer besides her singing. Her mercury is also in libra at 2 degrees (a Taurus degree, Taurus rules over the throat) also sextiles her north node which explains her vocals and becoming one of the most known singers worldwide.

🧚 Your 12th house could show you what you dream about. Mines in sag and I’ve coincidentally had one where I used a bow and arrow. (Should I make a post about this?)

🧚 4th house placements with harsh aspects can grow up with lots of family wounds, they’ve really gone through hell and back.

🧚 Virgo risings really care about getting dressed in a nice outfit every single day, even if it’s simple it will always be very put together. It’s a form of self care for them and they feel good when knowing they look good (Virgo’s are often into taking care of themselves in some way and this is in the house of self). They love buying clothes and going shopping too especially if Jupiter conjuncts the ascendant here, seriously they have like two wardrobes and call it one. Because they are so detail oriented as well I’ve noticed that they might really be into accessories when creating outfits and caring about how every little thing meshes in the right way.

🧚 Moon-Mars aspects will not hesitate to let everyone know how they feel about something (Mars has very straightforward assertive energy while the Moon rules over our emotions). ✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

Thank you for reading :) my heads been elsewhere the last couple months so my bad for not posting for a while, I hope to get back on track, thanks for all of your patience <33

#astrology #astro notes #astro observations #zodiac

1K notes · View notes

y0urzayn3 · 3 months

Text

Genshin Men finally Confess

For everyone who’s still single, (like me) enjoy valentines with these Genshin men

Characters - Zhongli, Ayato, Wriothesley, Diluc, Alhaitham x GN! Reader (separately)

Tw- Kaveh’s is suggestive, but the rest are fluff

⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣ ‧₊˚✧

He was the lord of geo, and you assured him throughout the course of the archon war. You helped him carefully strategise and plan his attacks, just as a good adviser should. Like Zhongli, you too dawn a geo vision, one that is tied around your neck with an amber ribbon made of nothing but the finest silk in all of Liyue.

Of course he was aware of the day known as Valentine’s Day, that celebrated nothing but love and bonds.

This, he thought, was the perfect day to confess to you the secrets he had held for so long.

On that day, he calls you to a cliff overlooking the entirety of Liyue, right at the time of dusk.

“Y/n,” he says holding a bouquet of your favourite flowers and a box of chocolates, “will you make me the happiest man alive and become my significant other?”

He was prepared for rejection, but what he didn’t expect was for you to jump into his arms with an excited squeal and a loud yes.

As the sun set in the background, you two shared your first kiss.

⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣ ‧₊˚✧

As the Yashiro Commissioner walked down the familiar roads of Inazuma city, he noticed the heart decorations and couples roaming around, evidently on dates. He tried to picture himself and you, his assistant, as some of them but quickly snapped out of it when he noticed what he was doing. Then he thought, why shouldn’t he spend Valentine’s Day with you? So, as soon as he finished his patrolling, he rushed to you. “Y/n, clear my and your entire schedules for tomorrow, we’re going on a date.” He then practically ran out of the room in embarrassment and left you blushing. Everything after that happened so fast that he didn’t even realise it and now here he is on his first ever date with you. You are at a small boba shop and Ayato decided to tease you by stealing some from your lips. Ayato knows that work is going to pile up after this, but seeing your flustered face makes so worth it.

⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣ ‧₊˚✧

Kaveh, a masterful achietect, whose only formidable opponent in the field was you. Although everyone knew you two despised each other, the acting grand sage decided having you two work on a project together might just help you get closer. (He had enough of Kaveh cribbing about something you said or did) To make matters worse, he had you two share the same dorm! Thus, the tedious project began. As you started working with Kaveh, you realised he wasn’t so bad after all. The insults you threw at him each other soon turned to words of affirmation and some flirtatious lines in private. At last, after many months, the project was completed on Valentine’s Day. The two of you decided to go out for a drink to celebrate. The night ended with lipstick marks and hickeys, looks like you two got a lot closer than the grand sage intended huh 👀.

⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣ ‧₊˚✧

As the Duke of the Fortress of Meropide, Wriothesley occasionally makes his visits to the surface, to ensure that everything is in order. On one of his visits, he came across your small cafe. As he entered, he was greeted by a homely decor and you, who were standing at the counter. Blissfully unaware of his post, you casually asked him what he would like. It was love at first sight for him. After the incident, he often visited your cafe and the two of you became good friends. He actually loved the dishes you served him so much, he asked you to teach him. So here he was, on the day before Valentine’s, helping you prepare what you would need the next day. Unbeknownst to you, he only insisted as he wanted to whip up a little something for you too— a box of macaroons iced with hearts.

⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣ ‧₊˚✧

Alhaitham often looked down on people, he found them to be much less intellectual than he preferred. That was until he met you, someone who was on par with him in academics. But what he truly loved about you, was your bubbly nature. He found himself looking forward to your untimely visits. Then it hit him. Like a downpour of bricks on his head. He liked you, romantically. Luckily for him, he’s read countless romance novels, and already had something in mind. On Valentine’s evening, he took you to Mawtiyima Forest for some stargazing. As the two of you admired the intricate constellations, he whispered a subtle “Isn’t the moon beautiful today?” in your ear. He knew you understood.

⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣⌣ ‧₊˚✧

a/n- for those confused, the phrase “isn’t the moon beautiful today?” is a poetic way of saying I love you.

belongs to @y0urzayn3, please don’t steal my work.

#zhongli x reader #ayato x reader #alhaitham x reader #kaveh x reader #wriothesley x reader #genshin x reader #genshin fluff #genshin wriothesley #Genshin ayato #genshin zhongli #Genshin Kaveh #Genshin Alhaitham #Wriothesley fluff #ayato fluff #zhongli fluff #kaveh fluff #alhaitham fluff

405 notes · View notes

leilakisakabiri · 11 months

Note

heyy, can u write one where gavi is obsessed by reader's smell?

Surprise (Gavi)

Summary: You and Gavi are in a long-distance relationship and you go to his game to surprise him, but he catches you.

Warning(s): None

Requested: Yes

A/N: Hey anon! Thank you so much for the request and thanks for being patient. Hopefully, I did the prompt justice! Not proofread.

Word Count: [1666]

Masterlist

You had reached out to Pedri a week ago asking him to help you surprise Gavi at the final La Liga game.

You were in university studying in America, and the two of you had been doing long distance since last summer. It was now early May and you had finished your exams just in time to be in Barcelona for the final game.

You had lied and told Gavi you wouldn’t be done for another week, before wishing him the best and making yourself scarce, telling him you were busy studying.

In the meantime, you had set up a plan to surprise him with Pedri and booked your tickets.

Once you landed in Barcelona, Pedri came to pick you up. You both smiled at each other warmly, telling each other about your lives since you’d been apart.

“I haven’t seen you since December. How have you been hermana?” Pedri questioned.

You laughed, telling him about your school and all the things you and your friends got up to.

“That sounds so fun. Now I’m jealous I never got to go to school in America!” He exclaimed.

“Mm. It’s probably not as fun as being a famous footballer.” You shrugged playfully.

“Yah I guess that’s cool too.” He remarked.

Before you knew it, you were pulling up to the stadium, and the nerves were beginning to set it in. You hadn’t seen Gavi in almost six months and you were a little nervous to see him again. Did he look the same? Would he be excited to see you?

Pedri could tell that you were getting in your head, and he placed a comforting hand on your shoulder.

“Don’t overthink it, he’ll be happy to see you. He was so sad you couldn’t be here.”

You looked up at him, “Really?”

He nodded affirmatively and you felt yourself loosen up, “Thanks Pedri.”

He gave you a smile, ushering you out of the car and into the stadium.

“Ok so we only have a few minutes before the rest of the team gets here so we have to be quick.” Pedri spoke leading you into the locker room.

The plan was that you would leave a note in Gavi’s locker telling him to look up into the family section of the stands, and he would glance up before the game and see you standing there wearing his jersey, cheering him on.

You didn’t want to mess up the before-game ritual, or the meeting with his team, so you opted for seeing him after the game as opposed to before.

You had just placed the note in his locker when you heard the locker room door open, male voices filling the air.

You looked up at Pedri in horror, his facial expression mirroring yours, as you both froze.

He snapped out of it first and pushed you towards the showers, “Oh shit, go hide!”

You had just snapped the shower curtain closed when you heard a voice, “Pedri, hey man. Why are you here so early?”

You heard Pedri let out an awkward laugh, and you cringed, poor boy was never a good liar, “Oh hey Ansu. Uhm- y’know just like to be early.”

A new voice responded, “Really since when?”

You breath caught in your throat, it was Gavi.

It had been so long since you heard his voice in person, it sounded so real, and so close. You felt a wave of emotions hit you. Hearing his voice made it ten times harder to keep yourself hidden, and only amplified how much you missed him.

“Ehh big game so wanted to start now.”

The boys seemed to accept his answer, continuing their conversation.

You silently prayed that they would move toward the other end of the locker room so that you could make a quick escape.

But it seemed like luck was not on your side today.

Gavi was in the middle of a sentence when he abruptly cut himself off.

“Do you smell that?” He asked, pausing to inhale.

“Did you just sniff the air?” Pedri asked him, trying to hold back his laughter.

“Shut up, it smells like Y/n.”

You felt your blood run cold. Oh shit. You had totally forgot about your perfume.

You had bought the perfume months ago, back when you were still with Gavi in Barcelona last summer. You had been looking for something that smelled like warm summer nights and when you found it you bought it instantly. However, it wasn’t just you who loved the smell as just twenty minutes after you wore it for the first time Gavi had you spread out on the couch, lips planting kisses all over you, hands exploring every inch of your body.

“You smell so good.” He groaned, kissing the column of your neck.

Your breathing was unsteady, and you found it hard to concentrate, “Thanks, I just bought it. It’s supposed to smell like summer."

“Well whatever it is, I love it.” Gavi murmured, his words caught between his mouth and your skin.

Since then, it had become your everyday perfume, and you spent the rest of summer wearing it and driving Gavi crazy.

He said it smelled exactly how he imagined you to be. Sweet and intoxicating.

Now you were wearing the same exact perfume, having forgotten about Gavi’s obsession with it.

You were scared that you had just outed yourself, but you were also impressed that the perfume had lingered for that long.

Guess it was a good buy.

“What?” Pedri asked him pretending to be confused, his voice pulling you out of your thoughts.

“She always smells like coconut and jasmine, and the locker room smells exactly like that.”

“I think the dirty socks are getting to your head. Go get ready.” Pedri retorted, trying to steer the conversation away from you.

Gavi shook his head, “Pedri I swear. Am I going crazy?”

Ansu spoke, “Nah bro I smell it too.”

That was all the confirmation Gavi needed, “Where is it coming from?” He asked as he set his bag down beginning to move around the room.

You could hear Pedri shuffling as well, presumably following the boy, “C’mon this is stupid. Let’s focus on the game. The rest of the team will be here any minute.”

Gavi sighed, “Ok yah.” He resigned, moving to go change into his uniform.

“Be honest Pedri, did you have a girl in here?” Ansu asked playfully.

You heard Pedri sputter, and you let out a small gasp, not being able to hold back your laughter.

“What was that?”

“What?” Pedri asked, his voice rising unintentionally.

“Swear I heard something over there.” Ansu stated.

You bit your lip, moving back into the shower, cursing yourself for making noise.

It was quiet for a moment, and then a second later you felt the shower curtain being ripped open.

You were greeted by a very stressed-out Pedri and a confused Ansu.

“What the fu-“ You desperately held up a finger to your mouth, pleading with him to be silent.

“What?” Gavi asked coming over.

Ansu quickly shut the curtain again, “Oh nothing. Just thought I saw a spider.”

They all moved away from the showers, and you let out a breathe. You couldn’t believe how close you were to being caught.

All you had wanted to do was surprise your boyfriend, but that was turning out to be much harder than you thought.

You heard more voices begin to fill the locker room, and you wondered if Pedri was going to come and get you or if you were on your own.

A moment later, the shower curtain slowly opened and Pedri popped his head inside.

“That was so close!” He whispered.

You stepped out of the shower, “I know! Now get me out of here.”

“Ok, most of the guys are in the main changing area, waiting for coach. We’re going the other way, so just walk in front of me and we’ll be good.”

You nodded, feeling Pedri walk behind you as you took a left out of the shower area.

You had your sights fixed on the door and were just steps away when a voice interrupted. “Pedri, do you know anything about this no-“ You heard Gavi ask before his voice faltered,

“Who’s that?”

You squeezed your eyes shut, knowing your cover had officially been blown.

You felt Pedri freeze behind you. He began to speak without turning around, scrambling to come up with something.

You cut him off, turning around and finally revealing yourself, “Surprise!”

Gavi stood there in shock staring at you for about five seconds, unmoving, before his body caught up to his brain and then he was colliding into you, arms wrapping around you and pulling you into a tight hug.

“Holy shit. Y/n? What are you doing here bebe?” He asked his voice rising in excitement.

You giggled as he picked you up, spinning you around.

You looked up at him once he put you down, reaching up to caress his cheek, “I wanted to surprise you! But you kind of ruined it for yourself.” You admitted.

“I don’t even care. I’m so happy you’re here.” He spoke, grabbing your hand and intertwining your fingers.

You smiled, kissing his cheek as you promised you’d find him after the game.

He walked you to the door, as you basked in each other’s presence.

You gave him one last kiss before pulling away.

“I knew I smelled you!” he exclaimed.

You giggled, “Yah I forgot about that. Can’t believe you sniffed me out.” You teased while ruffling his hair.

He gave you a playful glare before fixing his hair, “Oh c’mon you know I love it.”

You smiled, “I know.”

You gave him one last wave before turning and walking through the tunnels towards the seats.

You heard him yell after you, “Nice jersey!”

You turned around, a grin on your face, “Thanks. It’s my boyfriend’s.”

2K notes · View notes

angelltheninth · 6 months

Text

There is More in You

Pairing: Miguel O'Hara x Fem!Reader

Tags: fluff, hurt/comfort, struggles with self-worth, kissing/making out, words of affirmation, grinding, suggestive towards the end

Word count: 1.1k

Flufftober Day 30: Self-Worth / Self-Love

A/N: Have to have one last bit of angst with this flufftober and who better to have it with then Miguel. Also... should I make a spicy version of this?

For the past few months you've seen Miguel go from normal sleep, to few hours of sleep to you not even seeing him sleep at all. He claims he does sleep, but it's always a few hours he gets in his office chair, which isn't the most comfortable even for him with his powers. Worst then that his injuries have been getting more severe, from little scratches to bruises to his hands trembling when he'd put them in ice to stop the bleeding. It was self-destructive, dangerous, reckless, you knew it and so did all of his friends. But he doesn't listen to them.

"He'll listen to you, he always does." Lyla droned on as she hovered around you. "I tried talking to him and he shut me off, can you believe that guy? Me! His best ever assistant!" You've never seen a hologram so offended before.

"You don't think I tried? He tells me not to worry, that he's got this, that he's fine." Frustration kept building inside you for all those times when be brushed your concerns off with a smile and kiss. "Where is he anyway?" You've only seen him briefly when you ate together and even then he didn't say much to you, not like he used to.

"Where do you think?" Lyla pointed in the direction of his home office, where Miguel spent a lot of his time lately.

With a heavy sigh you thanked her, "I'll go and talk to him. Thanks Lyla."

"Any time. Good luck sweetheart." At least she still called you that. You missed hearing it from Miguel's mouth.

Opening the door you didn't find him at his desk, but on the floor doing push-ups, his hands wrapped up, still healing, same with his ribs, "Oh hey. Time to eat yet? I'll be out soon, I just got to-"

"No Miguel, it's still noon. Do you even know how long you've been in here?" His quick glance at the clock told you he had no idea, "Since dinner. You didn't even come out for breakfast. You… for gods sake Miguel, you spend more time in here then you do anywhere else." You wrapped your arms around yourself and looked at him, "Then you do with me." Your voice came out small, hurt, insecure.

He jumped up, ran his hand through his hair and looked at the mission reports on the desk, "Ah, I know I've been busy lately. But you… it's important that this… I really need to make sure everything is perfect."

"Perfect for who? Because I can tell you that everyone is worried about you. You don't sleep, you don't eat, you're throwing yourself into dangerous situations all the time and then you expect me not to worry. In case you for got, I'm your wife, so I don't get to stop worrying about you." He briefly looked at the wedding ring and photos on his desk, then back at you.

"You don't get it. I have to-" He paused, lips pressed together in frustration.

"Then help me understand. You hardly even talk to me anymore. I know your work is important and I don't have crazy superpowers like you and your friends, but I'm always here for you." The look in your eyes softened when you stepped closer to him and pressed your hands gently against his chest, feeling his rapid heartbeat.

Miguel shook his head, frowning, "I know, and it's because of that… I need to do better. If I can't keep you safe, if I can't keep my team safe, if I send them on the wrong track, if I can't protect them…. if I can't do that then… what is all this for?" He gestured around the room, the inventions, the pictures, at himself, the bruises he has, "What am I for if I can't make sure you're safe?"

Rarely did you see him on the verge of tears. Frustration yes, stress, but not this distraught. "You work hard." You kissed the right side of his jaw, "You take care of your friends." The other side, a bit longer of a kiss, "You make sure to give them time with their loved ones." One kiss on his shoulder, "You're there if they wanna talk." Then the other shoulder, "You make sure to leave me messages when you leave." A very long kiss on his neck, "You can be such a romantic." You needed to raise up on your toes to place a kiss under his ear, "There is so much more to you then being a leader." Another kiss on his chin.

Miguel's eyes fluttered, big hands grasping at your hips, pulling you close. He all but melted against your affections. "I love you. I'm so sorry I haven't been showing it like I should have. You're right, and I can do better. I promise to do better."

"Haven't you been listening? You have to relax more, lean on other people, why not let Peter do a few things? Or that detective guy? Or… I don't know the one with the cool cowboy hat? You don't have to do anything alone. You can rely on me too." He half huffed, half chuckled before he kisses your lips, "And you know what else you're really good at?" You leaned in close, "Something that you've been neglecting lately…" His eyes dropped to your lips, no, even lower, "You're a damn good kisser, Mr. O'Hara."

"I am? I'm afraid I don't remember that? Could you please remind me, Mrs. O'Hara?" The grins disappeared off both your lips when they came together, pushing, pressing against each other like it's been years since they touched. Miguel's hands went up your body, against your smaller shoulders, holding you close to him while you pressed yourself further up, hands around his neck.

Changing the angle you sought to deepen the kiss, licking past his lips, against his fangs. Miguel groaned into your mouth, a sound that you haven't heard in this context for a while. You found yourself walking backwards, hitting the door, trapped against him. His lips left yours, but not your body, seeking the skin of your neck to latch onto as he hoisted you up, your legs hooking around his hips.

It's been so long since you felt him like this you couldn't stop yourself from moaning, seeking friction, rolling your hips against him, kissing every inch of him that could. How long has it been since you've had this? According to the ache between your legs, way too long. At least this time he was ready to do something about it.

#miguel o’hara x reader #miguel o'hara #miguel o’hara imagine #across the spiderverse #spiderman across the spiderverse #miguel x reader #miguel o'hara fluff #miguel fluff #marvel fluff #spiderverse x reader #atsv x reader #atsv imagines #miguel o'hara imagine #miguel o’hara #marvel x reader #marvel imagine #marvel x you #x reader #flufftober

448 notes · View notes

socialistexan · 1 year

Text

What's missing from the "regret rate" number is the reason people regret it. It overwhelmingly usually due to aesthetic reasons or social pressure.

It's extremely rare that a person gets some form of gender affirming surgery and then later realizes they are not transgender and fully detrans (and these people deserve all of our love and support, if anyone knows what it's like to live in the wrong gender it's us). It's even rarer that one of these detrans people go on to join a reactionary movement to try to eliminate trans people, yet they get amplified more than anyone else in society. That 1% of a 1% of a 1%? That's who is being listened to.

I really need cis people to understand how difficult it is to get gender affirming surgery in this country. It takes literal years to even be considered for it.

Cards on the table, I'm in the process right now for getting bottom surgery. I have been hormones for over 2 years. The minimum requirement is 1 year, but that rarely happens. I've had to be evaluated by two different psychiatrists and I'll need to see them again to get a letter saying they cleared me (and they're only good for 1 calendar year). On top of that, I contacted a surgeon for my first initial consultation, but isn't scheduled until October. And that's just the first visit! It takes months after that to even schedule the surgery.

You don't really go through that whole process unless you are extremely sure.

No one, especially not a child, is walking into a gender clinic and walks out same day with hormones, a hysterectomy, a membership card.

But I'll meet this Republican congressman halfway through. You can ban transition related surgery for people under 26 is you ban any and all surgery or medical care that can permanently alter someone in any way. No heart surgery. No life saving amputations. No chemo. (I would say no vaccines, but this is a MAGA Republican we're talking about). Did you know Tylenol if taken too long can cause stomach bleeding and damage you long term? So no Tylenol.

But why stop there? Shoes can give you long lasting foot or back issues, so that's gotta be banned, too. Sunscreen? You're applying a chemical your child so they'll """be healthier"""?? Yeah, right, groomer.

Ugh. I'm just so tired.

#trans #transgender #nonbinary #lgbtq #lgbt

2K notes · View notes

1nyourdr34ms · 2 months

Text

100 days of mark

+18, MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!

pairing: mark x fem!reader

synopsis: just before your wedding, karina convinces you to go on a 100 day trip to europe where you meet mark lee.

warnings: unprotected sex; p*ssy eating, doggy, missionary (guys, always. ALWAYS PROTECT!).

a/n: 1) jonas is fictional. 2) do you need a part 2 of this? then pls let me know ✍️🏻

"I'll miss you so much," you murmured, clinging tighter to your fiancé under the blanket. The dimmed light of the room reflected off your face, your cheeks almost crushed against your fiancé's chest. You felt his lips in your hair. "Me too, sweetheart," he replied in almost a whisper.

You and Jonas had been engaged for 6 months. You met at a software development company where you both worked, 2 years ago. He had much more professional experience than you and introduced you to the workflow. Right from the start, he fell for you.

He was taller than you, with a sweet smile, doe-like eyes, and a muscular build. He was always kind to you, mostly taking care of you when you felt misunderstood or rejected by others. With him, you could share your sorrows, whether they were work-related or personal. You knew he was always there for you.

Three months after your first acquaintance, he confessed his love, and after eight months, he proposed. He was quite determined... You knew everything was moving too fast, but you surrendered to him. That's just how it was in your relationship: Jonas knew what was right and guided you through life, and you trusted him completely. With him, you felt like a winner.

Karina, your childhood friend, watched as your life changed rapidly. You were 25 and on the verge of becoming a married woman. She was happy for you, yet at the same time, she was sad that she wouldn't see you as often as in the old days after the wedding. She believed Jonas wouldn't allow it.

Naturally, you found the idea absurd. Jonas wasn't the type to forbid you things or limit you, but maybe Karina wasn't entirely wrong... You feared that after the wedding, you wouldn't be able to experience your old freedom anymore.

So, you came up with the idea to join your old scholarship group from university on a 100-day trip to Europe: London, Vienna, and Brussels. Jonas - and especially his mother - were initially skeptical about this idea, but somehow, you managed to convince him at least.

"Did you remember your ticket? And you have provisions too? Very good... Ah, what about your phone credit, do you have enough?" Jonas pressed, as he checked the necessary documents for your flight.

Karina rolled her eyes as she hurried along beside you and Jonas. You kept nodding and assured Jonas that you were perfectly prepared.

"Take care of yourself, love, and call me as soon as you arrive at the hotel," he reminded you with care. You gave him an affirming smile and a final kiss before heading off with Karina to your plane.

"Finally, you can breathe again. It's okay to still feel sad, but as soon as we're off the plane, you're switching off from all that stress, promise?" By stress, she meant Jonas. You rolled your eyes, "Yeah, whatever."

Karina glanced at your hand and frowned, "And take off that stupid ring," she noted. "Are you crazy? I can't just take off my engagement ring!" you protested. Karina sighed, "You can't fully enjoy the trip if you're constantly reminded of Jonas every time you see your ring. These might be the last 100 days we spend together as friends. Take it off," Karina urged encouragingly.

You felt uneasy about it, but ultimately you followed Karina's advice. After all, these were indeed the last times you would spend unmarried with your best friend, and a little break from thinking about your relationship might do you good.

Day 1 to 33 in London

A trip organized by a scholarship foundation is not quite a real vacation at the end of the day. That means you sometimes get assignments to explore the history of the city and present it to the other participants in the form of a lecture, or to participate in discussion rounds.

Despite this, the trip was a lot of fun for you because it didn't really feel like school. It was much more relaxed, and you weren't obliged to do anything you weren't interested in.

In the first few weeks, solid groups formed. There were a total of 40 participants. You and Karina were initially always assigned to the same people during group activities: Johnny Suh, Mark Lee, Nakamoto Yuta, and Wendy.

Therefore, it was no surprise that you continued to stick together in the following days. Most people were quite likable and easy-going. The evenings were always full of laughter, fun, and joy. You also met a few times just the six of you without the other participants, which helped you get to know each other better.

With Johnny, Mark, and Yuta, it was never boring. These guys always managed to make you laugh. You found it particularly funny when Mark became the center of the jokes. He was such a naive, genuine boy that you always had to laugh at, even when he did nothing special. Just the fact that he would burst into laughter at every little thing Johnny did was hilarious to you.

You even created a group chat, which was also always filled with laughter and silliness.

Mark: dude, I'm serious ㅠㅠㅠㅠ

Wendy: you're in the same room

Wendy: but can't manage

Wendy: to communicate

Wendy: ´_´

You: hahahhaa

Johnny: the thing is

Yuta: I'm telling you

Johnny: we don't want to go

Yuta: I can go

Johnny: -_-

You: hahahhaa

Karina: ahhahahaha

Mark: soooo?!

Wendy: okay okay

Wendy: who wants

Wendy: to accompany Mark?

Wendy: not me

Yuta: ME!

Johnny: nope

You: I can go too:)

Karina: too exhausted

Yuta: yesss, so Mark, y/n, and me??

You: okay:)

Mark: 👍🏻

"Geez, what’s taking him so long?" Mark muttered as you both waited outside for Yuta. It was 11:11 PM, Mark couldn't sleep and wanted to buy something to drink at the hotel's café.

By chance, you couldn't sleep either and didn't mind the idea. Mark sighed as he read the message on his phone, "Yuta canceled." You nodded, "Then it's just the two of us. Come on, before they close the café," you called out and started walking ahead.

You had never been alone with Mark before. It felt odd to be with him without Johnny and Yuta around. You got a cup of cappuccino while Mark ordered a cup of black coffee. "You know that's going to keep you up even longer, right?" you suggested. Mark shrugged, "I can't sleep anyway," he clarified. You both thanked the waiter. "Why not? Are you suffering from insomnia?" you asked. "I'm not sure. Since college, I haven't been able to sleep properly."

Mark looked at you for a long moment, "It's more than just insomnia. Sometimes... sometimes my mind is just too loud. Too many thoughts, too many worries keeping me awake at night." His voice was softer, more reflective.

You took a sip of your cappuccino, letting the warmth spread within you as you studied Mark. The contrast to the Mark you knew was striking. The ever-cheerful and carefree boy in front of you suddenly seemed vulnerable, almost fragile. "I never got the impression that something was weighing on you so heavily," you said gently.

Mark forced a small smile, more sad than joyful. "Well, guess, I'm good at hiding it."

You pondered over Mark's words, wondering what could be troubling him so deeply. Just as you were about to delve deeper into your thoughts, Mark broke the silence.

"You know what's weird? I read somewhere that if you can't sleep, it means…um… you're awake in someone else's dreams. Well… Maybe someone is constantly dreaming about me, and that's… y’know… why I can't sleep. Imagine it's a total stranger taking me on weird adventures in their dreams," Mark said with a crooked grin.

For a moment, you couldn't believe he had just said that. You stared at him, unsure whether to laugh or shake your head.

"Are you serious?" you couldn't help but ask, trying to suppress your grin. "So you're saying, somewhere out there, someone dreams about you every night, taking you on imaginary adventures, and that's why you can't sleep?"

Mark's smile widened as he realized how absurd his statement must have sounded. "Well, when you put it like that, it sounds pretty crazy, right? But…. who knows, maybe it's true.", his voice cracked.

Both of you burst into liberating laughter. What was going through his head to come up with such nonsense?

You didn't know why, but you liked his quirky ways. It was like a breath of fresh air to talk to someone who could freely express his thoughts without worrying about how they might come across.

The next day, a trip to Regent's Park, one of London's Royal Parks, was on the agenda. You were quite excited to visit this place known for its beautiful gardens, expansive green spaces, and sports facilities. You, Karina, Johnny, and Mark naturally formed a group as usual.

The day was sunny and warm, perfect for an outing. Mark was unusually energetic and seemed to particularly enjoy the sunny day today. He was almost hopping with excitement and made charming comments about everything encountered on his way.

"Yo, see that dog over there? We had one like that at home when I was a kid. They're known to be brave. Kind of crazy, because they don't look brave... Reminds me a bit of myself," Mark said, pointing to a dachshund chasing a squirrel.

"Dude, if you're already identifying with animals, what kind of bird would you be then? A parrot does not sound bad, right?" Johnny teased.

During your walk through Regent's Park, you encountered a particularly lively squirrel that approached you curiously. Mark looked fascinated and began talking to the little creature,

"Hey buddy, what's up? Come here, buddy," as if it would understand him. He didn't notice that he started to dance with his feet unconsciously while his entire focus was on the squirrel.

You watched him from behind and couldn't help but smile when you noticed Mark's unconscious foot movements. You quietly pointed it out to the others – Johnny and Karina – who also couldn't help but giggle as they watched him.

While Mark was still occupied with the squirrel, you carefully stepped closer behind him, directly into his field of vision, and began to mimic his foot movements.

When Mark turned around and saw you directly in front of him, imitating him with a charming smile, he burst into a heartfelt laughter, delighted and surprised by your attention.

However, the sudden closeness and your smile made him momentarily nervous, which he hid behind a smile. Despite the nervousness that arose within him, he wasn't overwhelmed by it; he shook his head laughing and continued on.

During the days in London, your bond with Mark deepened increasingly.

It seemed as if you were magnetically drawn to each other, whether you were participating in a guided tour through London's historic quarters, relaxing in one of its numerous parks, or exploring the local cuisine in small, hidden restaurants.

It had almost become a matter of course that you always sat next to each other; your places were always side by side.

During group meals, you instinctively sought out Mark's proximity. You shared dishes, tasted from each other's plates, and exchanged glances and smiles that was sus to others.

You believed you had found a good male friend who understood you just as well as Karina did, maybe even more. And you had never had a male friend before, so the whole friendship thing with Mark was entirely new to you.

Jonas texted and called you regularly to ask how you were doing and what new things you had seen or learned. He mostly talked about his day-to-day life but also listened to you now and then. You decided not to tell him about Mark, unsure how Jonas would take the news that you got along so well with another man. Besides, it was unclear when you would see Mark again after the 100-day trip was over.

In the evenings, when the group settled into cozy pubs to wind down the day, you and Mark often found yourselves in deep, personal conversations.

The topic unexpectedly turned to fairy tales, perhaps inspired by the historical settings of London you had explored earlier. Mark, with a thoughtful look in his eyes, leaned back and played with the rim of his glass.

"You know," he began, choosing his words carefully, "fairy tales have this incredible way of fascinating us, no matter how old we are. They speak of courage, adventure, and, of course, love. But I…um.. often wonder, like… how much of that is really transferable to our real lives."

You nodded as you absorbed his words. "Fairy tales have always fascinated me. The romance, the heroics, the happy endings... but somehow, they seem too good to be true. Real life is more complicated, unpredictable."

There was a brief pause as both of you took a sip of your drinks, contemplative about what had been said.

Then, with a crooked smile you had come to like about Mark because it always brought a certain lightness, he posed an unexpected question.

"Do you believe in the prince on a white horse?" His voice was gentle, almost cautious, as if he didn't want to stir your innermost feelings.

You paused for a moment, taken aback by the directness of the question.

"I'd like to believe that there's such a thing as a 'prince,' yes. But not in the literal sense. More like someone who's there for you, who understands and accepts you as you are. Someone you can team up with."

Mark's eyes lit up as he heard your words, and it seemed like he had wanted to hear exactly that. But then, almost hesitantly, he asked another question that changed the atmosphere.

"Have you ever thought that there could be such a 'prince' in your life, or might be?" His voice was softer now, almost whispering, as if he was intruding too closely.

This question caught you off guard, and for a moment, you felt as if the ground beneath you was giving way. Your heartbeat quickened, and you felt a knot forming in your stomach. Thoughts swirled through your head—Jonas, your engagement, the expectations, and the uncertain future.

You tried to keep your emotions in check. Your gaze lowered, and you nervously played with the rim of your own glass. The silence between you was oppressive.

Finally, with a voice quieter than intended, you shook your head. "I... I'm not sure." Your words were a whisper, almost lost in the noise of the pub. "I thought I might be certain... but now, I'm not so sure, to be honest."

Mark's expression shifted from curious to contemplative, perhaps even concerned. He leaned in closer, his presence strangely comforting. "It's okay not to know everything," he said softly, finishing the alcohol in his glass in one gulp.

The days in London flew by, and with each passing day, the bond between you two grew stronger, woven from shared experiences, shared laughter, and quiet moments of closeness.

On the evening after another eventful day in London, the group gathered in a cozy cabin, somewhat secluded, to wind down the evening. The atmosphere was lively, with music, laughter, and the sound of glasses clinking. You played various games, from card games to truth or dare, and everyone seemed to enjoy the moment to the fullest.

Mark, in the midst of one of the games, suddenly became the center of a challenging task that led him to sing spontaneously. His voice, surprisingly soft and emotional, filled the room, and his eyes half-closed as he immersed himself in the song.

In that moment, as you saw him like this - vulnerable, authentic, and completely in his element - you felt your heart beat faster for the first time. It was as if the world around you fell silent for a moment, and all that remained was the melody of his voice. An unfamiliar twinge shot through your stomach.

Without really understanding why, you suddenly felt the urge to leave the room, to escape the loud voices and laughter. You quietly retreated to your room and sat on your bed, gazing out the window into the night sky. The stars twinkled as if they were harboring a secret that was simmering inside you.

Your grasp on your phone, an attempt to cling to the familiar, led you through the gallery of shared moments with Jonas. Yet, as you scrolled through the photos, you felt a strange distance from these memories, as if they were part of another life. The images no longer seemed capable of filling the emerging void that Mark's unexpected performance had left in you.

On the last evening of your stay in London, the group decided to come together once more to drink, play, and fittingly conclude the time you had spent together. The mood was lively and cheerful, a perfect ending to the unforgettable days you had shared.

During the evening, as music played and the group was in high spirits, the idea suddenly came up that everyone should take a turn dancing. Naturally, you were chosen.

At first, you hesitated, as you weren't usually one to take center stage. But the others, led by Karina, cheered you on with shouts and encouraging calls. Even Mark's expression, full of anticipation and an infectious smile, gave you the final push you needed.

Finally, with a deep breath and a tingling feeling of excitement, you stood up. The song "Nobody Knows" by KISS OF LIFE was playing. Thankfully, you could dance the choreography from start to end and were even quite good at it, having danced extensively in your past. You began to dance, initially with hesitation, but with every move, you became more confident. Your movements started to become more sensual and alluring.

Mark, who had been cheerful and boisterous until now, felt as if he had been struck by the sight. Each of your fluid movements enchanted him, making his heart race. A dry feeling spread in his throat as he tried to hide his reaction from the others. The way you moved to the music was mesmerizing, and he found it increasingly difficult to look away from you and your body. He suddenly saw you in a completely different light and was scared of the feelings and desires that had been stirred within him.

As the dance ended, the energy in the room was electrifying. The group stood up, cheering and applauding, impressed by your unexpected performance. Mark, forcing himself back to reality, began to clap slowly, nodding in appreciation while he tried to sort his thoughts and emotions. His heart was still beating faster than usual, evidence of the effect you had on him.

You, now back in your seat, tried to calm your breathing and ignore the rising blush on your cheeks.

Your eyes met Mark's. You noticed that his expression had suddenly changed, and his gaze seemed to penetrate deeply into you. Without knowing why, it sparked an inexplicable warmth within you that you relished. At the same time, you felt proud of yourself for having such an effect on him.

Days 34 to 66 in Vienna

As the group arrived in Vienna, a new chapter of your European adventure began.

The city, with its rich history, magnificent buildings, and cozy coffee houses, provided a perfect backdrop for deepening the bond between you and Mark.

You felt freer in Vienna than ever before. You could be yourself, without restraint, and Mark seemed to appreciate every facet of your personality. It was as if you could unleash your inner child in his presence, without fear of rejection or judgment. Something you hadn't experienced in a long time.

Since meeting Jonas, you had been trying hard to stay on his level, to be mature and not disappoint the image he had built of himself. Vienna unleashed the exact opposite in you. Mark, for his part, just went along with it, his lightness and humor often made you forget there was a world outside your little bubble.

On a rainy evening in Vienna, the group decided to gather in the cozy lobby of their hostel to play games. The atmosphere was warm and inviting, with the gentle pattering of rain on the windows and the dim lighting creating a cozy mood.

Someone suggested playing Twister. The group enthusiastically agreed, and soon the Twister game mat was spread out on the floor, colorful and inviting.

Mark and you were both players in this round, along with a few others from the group.

As the game started, Mark and you quickly found yourselves in precarious positions. Each spin of the wheel added another layer of closeness and intimacy to the game. You felt your cheeks flushing every time you had to bend or stretch, feeling Mark's warm body so close to your own.

Mark's breathing was calm and focused, and despite the humorous and light-hearted atmosphere of the game, there was a certain tension, an electrifying feeling in the air, every time your hands or feet found touchpoints.

In a particularly memorable moment, as Mark tried to place his left hand on green while simultaneously maintaining his balance to avoid falling on you, your eyes met. In that brief, silent exchange, there was an unspoken question, a curiosity, and perhaps even a hint of desire.

Suddenly, Mark stretched out his right leg, positioning you beneath him with his lower part pressing against your abdomen.

The intense impact of his body made your heart pound loudly in your chest as if it were the only sound you could hear over the laughter and cheers of your friends. The warmth of Mark's body, separated only by the thin layer of your clothes, sent a tingling through your entire body that you hadn't known before.

When the game finally ended, amidst general laughter, you felt oddly dizzy, almost as if in a dream. Mark, returning to his usual boisterous self, gave you a broad, irresistible smile that made your heart skip a beat for a moment.

The next day, as the clouds cleared and the sun began to shine over Vienna once again, the group decided on an outdoor game to enjoy the free time.

Dodgeball was the chosen activity. In a nearby park, which offered ample space, two teams were formed. You and Mark naturally ended up on the same team, again.

Mark, proving to be surprisingly agile and skilled, quickly became the central player of your team. With his quick reactions and clever handling of the ball, he managed to eliminate opposing players multiple times.

You noticed how safe you felt when you were near him. Instinctively, you began to position yourself behind him to shield yourself from the incoming balls. Mark quickly seemed to notice this and almost naturally assumed the role of your personal protector. He strategically positioned himself to shield you with his body while still keeping an eye on the game.

Every time a ball flew in your direction, Mark was there to deflect it or catch it skillfully. His protective instinct was impressive, and you couldn't help feeling a bit flattered.

You noticed your teammates and even some opponents chuckling as they saw Mark repeatedly shielding you.

In the shade of the trees, as the group relaxed and talked about the funniest moments of the game, you found a moment to quietly thank Mark.

"Thanks for being my personal bodyguard today," you said with a mischievous smile. Mark returned the smile. "Anytime," he replied, his voice full of unspoken promises.

After the successful day playing dodgeball, the group planned another game for the following day to promote camaraderie and fun among everyone.

This time, they decided on a game of Capture the Flag in a larger park in Vienna, which was perfect for it with its many hiding spots and open areas. The group was divided into two teams again.

During the game, you often found yourself alongside Jaemin, Mark's cousin, who proved to be a skilled strategic planner.

You worked well together, carefully planning your moves and supporting each other in defending your flag as well as attempting to capture the opposing team's flag.

Your collaboration was purely platonic and focused on the game, but from the outside, it could appear differently, especially in moments when you leaned in close to consult or patted each other on the shoulder to congratulate on a successful play.

Mark, who was on the opposing team, noticed the close cooperation between you and Jaemin. Even though he knew it was just a game, he couldn't shake off an uncomfortable feeling.

Watching you laugh and devise plans together, he felt an unexpected pang of jealousy arise within him. The obvious chemistry and shared laughter with Jaemin caught him off guard and awakened a deep-seated insecurity in him.

Days 67 to 99 in Brussels

Upon arriving in Brussels, you sensed a noticeable change in the group's dynamics. The city provided a perfect backdrop for many adventures. Yet, despite the breathtaking surroundings and numerous new experiences, you increasingly felt uncomfortable with the evident changes in the behaviors of Johnny, Yuta, and especially Mark.

During communal meals or while exploring the city, Johnny and Yuta made insinuations and exchanged meaningful glances that obviously concerned Mark and you. It was as if they were hinting at a subtle connection between you and Mark, one you hardly dared to dream of yourself.

The situation came to a head one evening when the group gathered in one of the cozy Brussels cafes to play "Truth or Dare."

The mood was relaxed, and the game seemed a welcome distraction from the day's exhaustive explorations. When it was Mark's turn, he chose "Truth" after a brief hesitation.

A tense silence fell over the group as Johnny posed the question: "Mark, who in this group do you feel most connected to?" All eyes were on Mark, and you felt your heart skip a beat.

Deep down, despite knowing about your engagement and the inappropriateness of such feelings, you hoped he might mention your name.

Mark was silent for a moment, his gaze sweeping over the faces of those present, and it was obvious he was wrestling with himself. Finally, after a deep breath, he mentioned the name of another female participant, Giselle. His answer came as a surprise and raised a few eyebrows in the group.

Johnny and Yuta couldn't suppress a giggle, as if amused by Mark's attempt to conceal his true feelings.

Their reaction only added to your confusion and discomfort. Deep down, you felt hurt, even though you knew you had no right to.

After all, you were engaged, and any hope for something more between you and Mark was nothing but an illusion.

Despite the sharp disappointment that threatened to overwhelm you, you put on your best smile and continued to participate in the game as if nothing had happened.

It's incredible how much change 50 days have stirred within you. You hardly recognized yourself anymore.

The following days in Brussels were marked by a subtle distance you built up towards Mark.

Although you remained part of the group activities and Mark was always friendly and accommodating, you couldn't help but wonder what was really going on behind his facade.

Was his answer in the game a conscious decision to hide his true feelings, or did it actually reflect his sentiments?

You increasingly spent time with other group members to fill the growing void left by Mark's distant behavior.

Among these was Jaehyun, a likable and charismatic participant who proved to be pleasant company. Your joint outings and conversations offered you some comfort and distracted you from the simmering emotions.

Mark, observing the growing closeness between Jaehyun and you with increasing unease, found himself in a whirlpool of conflicting feelings.

His eyes betrayed a mix of irritation and concern every time he saw you laughing or discussing together. You, unable to ignore Mark's glances, felt a growing restlessness in your heart.

You missed the ease and depth of your earlier interactions and longed to bridge the gap.

Determined to break the silence and bridge the unexplainable distance, you summoned the courage one night to call Mark to your room.

With trembling hands and a heart full of hope, you typed a message to him: "Can you please come to my room? I need to see you."

After sending the message, you lay awake, clutching your phone tightly, staring at the screen, half expecting, half fearing his response or the lack thereof.

Minutes passed like hours, and a part of you started to believe he would ignore your request, that the gap between you had grown too wide.

But then, you heard a soft knock at your door. Your heart skipped a beat, and for a moment, you hardly dared to breathe.

With hesitant steps, you approached the door and opened it to find Mark standing there.

You and Mark sat next to each other in silence on your bed. Despite the tension between you, you felt a deep longing to be even closer to Mark than mere physical proximity allowed.

Your thoughts were running in circles, caught between what was wrong and what you secretly desired.

Mark broke the silence, his voice fragile and hesitant. "You know, sometimes, when I see or think about you, thoughts come to my mind... thoughts that feel wrong."

His words hung heavily in the air, laden with the fear of the consequences of his confession.

Your heart pounded in your chest, your nervousness mixed with an unexplainable excitement.

You turned your head to him, your eyes seeking his, as you quietly asked, "What kind of thoughts?"

Mark's gaze met yours, filled with an intensity that shook you to the core. "Instinctive ones... the kind of thoughts that one should think twice, if not three times, before indulging," he confessed.

You felt the air around you start to vibrate. It was clear to you, what he was trying to say.

With a lowered gaze, barely audible, you whispered, "And what if I... would like it, when you just do?"

Mark was taken aback from your response, his "What?" was a whisper, fearful he might have misunderstood you.

You swallowed hard, your throat felt dry, your eyes fixated on a point at the window behind Mark, "I… I want to experience something new, Mark. Something... special?." you confessed.

Your eyes didn't move away from the point you were fixated on.

Mark searched your face for certainty but was even more confused than in the beginning, he frowned, "I need more words, y/n. What… what do you want to experience? Tell me."

"I… I don't know. Kinda emotional, physical intimacy, I guess. I want someone who accepts me as I am. Someone I don't have to pretend with to be someone, who isn't me. Does it make sense? I... I just want to let go and... feel, without thinking about whether it's right or wrong."

"Do you want it now?"

"What do you mean?" you asked, confused. You were disconnected from reality for a moment, sharing your deepest desires with him, that you totally forgot, that he was actually listening to you.

Mark shifted his position on your bed to face you fully. "I mean… what if I can give you the emotional… and…" he cleared his throat, and even in the evening light, you could see a hint of pink on his cheeks. "…the physical intimacy. Here and now."

"Here and now?" Your eyes widened.

"I can give you all of that if you want it. I mean… I'd like to… very much."

"So you're willing to accept me as I am?"

"Yes."

"Trust me completely?"

"Exactly."

"Not judge me for my weird choices?"

"Of course not."

You pondered for a while.

"If that's the case… then… would you like to… kiss me?"

Mark chuckled, "i’m dying to, actually."

He slid his hand to the back of your neck, before leaning in, while you looked down at his lips.

Your eyes closed right before the small gap between you two closed. Mark sighed as though he had just sunk into a hot bath after a long day.

You dropped your hands to his thigh, feeling the solid muscle below his denim. Marks free hand came to rest on your hip, his fingers dripping under your shirt to graze your bare skin.

The contact made you shiver slightly before he slid one of your hands up his thigh. You couldn’t help but smile into the kiss as you felt him shiver too.

You fell back onto your bed, pulling Mark with you. Your mouths opened simultaneously.

Mark groaned as his tongue slipped into your mouth. His grip on your hip thightened while his other hand pushed up into her hair.

He pulled gently your hair, making you moan as your kiss broke.

Mark used this opportunity to kiss your buttom lip, then your cheek, down your jaw and setlling into your neck, where he left opened mouthed kisses, allowing his hand to glide further up under your shirt until his fingers were resting underneath your bra.

„Mark“, you whispered and he mumbled into your neck, the vibrations pulling a soft moan from you.

„Do you... want to have sex with me?“

Mark pulled away from your neck and pulled his hand out from under your shirt, both of his hands were now cupping your face.

He gently pecked your nose, revelling in the little giggle you made before leaning his forehead against yours.

„You remember, when you had danced in Vienna? Then I knew, I wanted to have sex with you, but was too afraid, since I thought, you would reject me."

You remembered that day. Even then, it was clear to you that there was more between you and Mark, but you were too afraid to dig further and admit to yourself that you were attracted to him.

"Jesus, I want to give you everything you need, y/n.“

"What about you? Why don't you tell me what you need?", you said while your voice trembled. You couldn't believe you were in this situation, in Brussels, in a hotel room, with Mark Lee.

You felt inwardly relieved that you had insisted on staying alone in a room from the beginning. Without Karina or another roommate. Otherwise it would be very difficult to have him on your bed right now.

„You. I need you.“ Mark sucked the side of your neck lightly. Your lips lifted at the gesture, though your eyes remained shut. „Do you like this?“ he asked.

„Mmm…“ you hummed.

Mark moved his mouth to the opposite side of your throat. „I want to give you pleasure, y/n. I wish to make you cum today, does it sound good?“, he asked to reassure.

You swallowed at his choice of words. The abrupt change in him surprised you a bit, but at the same time, you were excited about what was about to happen.

You coaxed hum down with a twitch of your fingers, bringing his mouth to yours. The kiss was softer this time.

Your mouths barely parted and lips slowly caressed each other, and only parted for the cruel necessity of verbal communication.

„How can I say no to that?“, you said, stroking his face. „But, please… be gentle. Take your time.“ You shyly remarked.

„Gentle. I got you.“ Mark confirmed. Then, he pulled away.

You made a small noise of protest, but that didn't stop him.

Mark grasped your breasts and groped you tenderly, rolling the flesh within his palms and brushing your erect nipples with his thumbs.

You gasped at his light touches and he could smell sweetness of your cunt as you started to become wet.

With mooth, broad sweeps of his hands, he moved down your belly as he inched lower and lower. He kneeled between your legs, parting them, so he could rub circles into the insides of your thighs.

Above him, your breath quickened.

„May I-„

„Just do as you like.“ You stated.

Mark kept his approach gentle and slow as you wished, lapping at the outer folds, his tongue only incidentally dipping inside your clit.

You groaned and tried to close your knees around his head but he kept them still, forcing them back down on the mattress.

He kissed at the tantalizing mound until your muscles once again unwinded; then he resumed, this time licking into the dripping source of your torment.

When he focused his attention on throbbing bud at the apex of your inner folds, passing the flat of his tongue over it again and again, your hands weaved into his hair and begin to tug it.

He ignored it at first but then he heard a breathless, “Mark,” which made him lift his head immediately.

You gathered his face up in your palms, thumbing away at your juices on his chin.

Your eyes became dark and heady, pupils blown wide and skin hot as fire.

Mark wiped the liquid out and hovered back on you so that you were face to face.

„Mark,“ you moaned into his mouth as he kissed you hungrily while his hands were busy playing with your breasts.

„Do you want to try out a certain position?“ he whispered in your ear before nipping at that turn on spot just below your ear. Earning another moan from you before you nodded your head enthusiastically.

„Can I help choose one?“

„Of course“ Mark assured you as he pulled out his shirt and placed it out on the floor in front of you.

„Can we do this position, where…“ you tried to form a sentence, but were too taken aback from the sensation the situation gave you.

„What position?“ Mark queried as he climbed back onto the bed with you, now both only in your underwears, before kissing your neck tenderly.

„I want to try that…um.. you know which one.“ you were too try to speak it out.

„No, I don’t, tell me baby,“ Marks begged as he kissed you again just under your ear before returning his kisses to your neck as he lied on top of you.

He could guess which position you wanted but just wanted to hear the words roll off your tongue and out your mouth first.

„The… doggy… style one,“ you murmured, making Mark grin as he allowed his hand to snake back up your body.

He gently started to kiss down your neck, over your collar bone then down the valley in-between your breasts bevor kissing over your stomach.

„Do you want to take off my boxers or shall I?“ he asked before he kissed the top of your thigh.

„I want to do it,“ you breathed out as you sit up and him wathching you how your hands slowly slide down the hem of his grey boxer shorts until his hard member appeared.

„Arch your back a bit,“ Mark murmurrd into your ear before you could admire his member any longer.

You did as told and wihtin the next second he had your bra unclasped and thrown on the floor with the rest of your clothes.

„Are you sure you want to try this position?“ he confirmed with you and you nodded as you sit up and allowed him to put you in the position.

Mark got you to kneel in front of him with your back to his, and your legs opened enough for him to enter you.

„Ready?“ Mark asked to make sure, you were prepared.

„Just fucking do it already, Mark.“ you plead unpatiently.

Mark thrusted into you, revelling in the wetness and warmth of your dripping pussy.

After enjoying the sensation for a few moments, Mark beginned to pump in and out of you until you both found a speed that you could enjoy.

Marks cock was definitely enjoying itself as it slided into your wet folds and proded your g-spot every time.

„Oh, Mark, oh… god-“ you moaned out as you started to move back against him, making him groan in response.

„Ah- fuck, you’re doing so well, baby,“ Mark groaned but before you could answer, he thrusted into you with some force making you shout out in pleasure.

Just as he felt, you were beginning to get close to your release; he stopped moving in you.

Before you could protest, he had you lying on your back on the bed. All that before he plunged his throbbing cock back into you.

„Sorry, darlin', I want to see you climax. I want to see your face when you go over the edge“, he murmured in your ear before nipping at your neck.

You easily adjustee to the new position as you began to meet hum thrust for thrust, as well as rocking against him.

With each thrust, Mark went deeper and deeper into you until you both meet your end.

Mark kept moving in and out of you until you have both come down from your highs.

Once that has happended, he moved so he was laid down next to you on your side. He started to softly draw random patterns on your stomach as you both tried to catch your breaths back.

„Dude, that was…“, he to form the correct words, but there were just so many that he couldn’t think of the perfect ones to say.

„Explosive? Mind Blowing?“ you filled in, making him chuckle as he rolled you on top of him before connecting his lips to yours.

„Gosh, am I fucking glad, that I listened to the boys and agreed to this trip. Where else would I have met you instead?“ Mark mumbleed as he looks at you with lovely eyes.

You forced a smile to his words. Calm and worried at the same time. Calm because you will by no means regret that you have this thing with Mark, and worried because you will probably hurt him if he found out about Jonas.

So for tonight, you decided to enjoy his presence next to you and dive into a worryless sleep. At least, that was an important motto, you got from Mark.

To your surprise, he was also be able to sleep safe and sound next to you, showing no signs of insomnia. Guess, someone out there forgot about taking Mark on an adventure that night - while you had your best, you could ever wish for.

#nct #nct mark #mark lee #mark lee imagine #mark lee x reader #mark lee x you #nct mark x you #mark lee imagines #nct 127 #nct dream #nct u #nct fics #nct mark smut #mark lee smut #nct smut #mark lee x y/n #nct mark y/n #kpop #kpop smut

208 notes · View notes

sluttywonwoo · 1 year

Note

In the mood to be ravaged by Minsung 😩😩

um. idk where this came from. goodnight.

word count: 1.2k

details: smut (mdni), threesome, oral, degradation, frat!au, toxic behavior

“hold her down,” minho sneers at his best friend, watching you with his arms crossed over his chest.

jisung mutters something under his breath but complies anyway, straddling your hips and pinning your wrists above your head on the mattress.

minho seems satisfied enough with that and squats down next to the bed so that he’s at eye level with you. you refuse to look at him, knowing your bratty behavior won’t get you anywhere, but you’re too proud to give him what he wants.

you’ve been fucking minho for, oh, a couple of months now. on and off. he’s good in bed but doesn’t want to be tied down, etc. etc. like every other frat guy you’ve ever met. except for jisung. unlike minho, jisung actually did seem to want to get to know you. he took you out on dates. he texted you goodnight. he didn’t have a snapchat account.

“i didn’t know he was your best friend,” you insist bitterly, glaring at jisung.

the only person who could’ve known and likely knew you were sleeping with both men was jisung. you’re trying to get a read on him, which is why you’re staring him down, but he maintains eye contact and stays stoic, not giving any indication as to whether or not your suspicion is correct.

minho snorts. “i don’t believe you.”

“he’s way too nice for anyone to assume he’s associated with you.” well, the position he had you in now wasn’t very nice but it was turning you on.

minho full-on laughs this time which gets you to finally turn your head in his direction. “nice? han jisung?”

“is that his last name?” you ask, looking back to the man in question who nods in affirmation. “then yes. he’s perfectly nice.”

“would someone perfectly nice fuck you behind their best friend’s back?”

“sure,” you say, shrugging to the best of your abilities with jisung on top of you. “i’m not anyone to you. we’re not exclusive, we’re not even a ‘we’. you text me when you’re horny, sometimes i respond. and vice versa. how could jisung have known we were sleeping together unless you told him? and even then, how could he have known how weird you’d get over it?”

“she ever talk back to you like that?” minho asks jisung, completely ignoring your little monologue.

for the first time, jisung looks nervous. he opens his mouth to speak but you cut him off before he does. “he likes it,” you say.

jisung’s cheeks flush even pinker and he averts his eyes from his best friend’s, all but confirming what you’ve just claimed.

“he likes being bossed around,” you continue, as if the poor man’s grave hasn’t been dug deep enough. “why do you think he spends so much time with you?”

minho makes a sound in the back of his throat, annoyed. “so you like having it both ways? being used like a slut and having one of your own?”

“see, you get it.”

“oh, i get it, alright,” he spits, standing back up. “ji, take your pants off.”

“wha- right now?”

“unless you don’t want to fuck her?”

“no i do, i do…”

he scrambles up and starts unbuckling his belt, fumbling with the clasp. you reach out to for him, your hands now free, and touch him gently.

“don’t feel pressured to do anything, baby. we can do this later, just us if you’d rather.”

jisung lifts his head to meet your gaze, smirking. his eyes, usually so bright and sparkly, have gone completely dark. it catches you off guard. “and let him have you all to himself? yeah right.”

you shake your head adamantly. “that’s not- i was just-”

“undress her,” minho interrupts, his voice echoing out from the corner of the room.

jisung finishes getting his own jeans off before moving on to you. you make it easier for him by lifting your hips so he can pull your pants off and then do the same with your arms for your shirt.

minho undresses himself, depriving you of the sight as he does it while you’re distracted by his best friend.

“min…” jisung murmurs when joins you both on the bed.

“hm?”

“can i… taste her?”

minho smirks and you fight the urge to roll your eyes. of course he was loving this. sure, doing this with jisung meant he had to share you, but it also meant he had another person to dominate. figures the power would go straight to his dick head as soon as he learned jisung would listen to his commands.

minho cocks his head to the side, pretending to think about it. “how badly do you want it?”

jisung gulps before answering, eyes falling between your thighs. “so bad.”

“fine, you can.”

“thank-”

“but only over her panties.”

jisung’s eyes go wide. “but-”

“take it or leave it.”

jisung whines, barely audible, but doesn’t protest further.

“sorry, baby,” he says to you, pouting as he parts your legs and lowers his head between them.

your hands fly to his hair the instant you feel his tongue on you, pushing his face further into your pussy. jisung moans against you which makes you moan in turn.

you don’t remember closing your eyes but when you open them, minho’s got his cock in his hand, squeezing it gently as he watches the two of you. he notices you looking at him and grins lazily.

“feel good?”

“uh huh…”

“jisung’s good at that, isn’t he?”

“mhm…”

“better than me?”

you blink at minho and frown. “i don’t—”

“i mean, he doesn’t seem to be making you scream right now so i can draw my own conclusions.”

“you’re an asshole,” you scoff.

he shrugs. “an asshole that can make you cum really, really hard.”

you want to point out that he’s purposely put jisung at a disadvantage by making him eat you out through your underwear but you don’t. instead, you focus the feeling of jisung workig you closer and closer to the edge with his tongue.

“don’t let her cum, ji.”

you both groan at that.

“no, no, no i’m so close. please don’t stop,” you plead, trying to trap him in place with your thighs around his head.

jisung freezes, unsure of who to listen to.

“please, baby, i’m right there,” you try again.

timidly, jisung nudges your clit with his tongue a couple more times, just enough to send you over. but minho yanks his best friend away as it washes over you, effectively ruining the orgasm and making you cry out in frustration as you clench around nothing.

“‘m sorry,” jisung mumbles.

“save it. get her on all fours.”

“i can do it myself,” you say defensively, pushing yourself up onto your elbows just for you to immediately lose your balance and fall back into the pillows.

minho doesn’t so much as blink at you. “like i said.”

jisung does end up helping you. he even holds you upright with his hands on your hips as he positions himself behind you. minho opted for the front, citing something about being the only one who could shut you up properly.

“ready?” he asks jisung as he taps his cock against your lips.

jisung nods, presumably, because you can feel the head of his cock push in just slightly.

“this time, don’t let her cum for real.”

“and if i do?”

minho just scoffs and shakes his head, muttering brat under his breath. “then we’ll just have to edge you as many times as we edge her.”

#coincidental #lost control and next thing i knew it was angst #answered #anon #stray kids smut #skz smut #lee know smut #han smut #han jisung smut #lee minho smut

1K notes · View notes

fullhalalalchemist · 1 year

Text

🚨🚨🚨Congress hiding behind "protecting" LGBTQ+ to push for censorship bills that would harm us

May 8, 2023

The EARN IT Act isn't the only bill Congress is rushing through this session that's secret goal is to censor and surveil Americans, especially queer ones.

KOSA (s.1409), or the Kid's Online Safety Act, is being hailed across the mainstream media and congress as the best bill to "protect children online from algorithmic harm" by essentially, blocking content that gives minors anxiety, depression, eating and substance abuse disorders, online bullying and harassment, sexual exploitation and abuse, suicidal behaviors, and addiction. It's gives the FTC, who are politically appointed by the president, and all 50 state attorney generals enforcement power to do this. As long as they can justify a website 'harmed' a minor by having content that leads to 'anxiety, sexual exploitation, and suicidal behaviors', they will push lawsuit over lawsuit to that site until it censors that content for the minor.

Oh, but that's not it, either. HOW will websites determine who is and isn't a minor? Well don't worry, because the bill says "age verification isn't required". That however does nothing to stop websites from pushing age verification. When they're about to be held liable and sued for millions, when there's an age verification lobby that has pushed these bills successfully in half the states, when websites should know "reasonably" that theres a minor, they are GOING to go for age verification. Multiple experts agree that this would happen.

Last year, nearly 100+ LGBT and human rights orgs sent a letter opposing KOSA. They were ignored and Senator Blumenthal (same guy who is pushing the EARN IT Act) met with different orgs to "update the language". Except nothing in the update language changes any of it's impact. Sure, they removed "grooming" from being a target of this bill and instead are focusing on "mental health". Except, the Missouri Attorneys General, in his emergency order banning gender affirming care, cited a number of medical studies effectively claiming that access to gender affirming care is causing young people to experience mental health issues. They will use ANY excuse to censor content.

This is the tumblr purge 2.0 but for the entire internet. It's just as bad as the EARN IT Act. And it has IMMENSE levels of support. You have the national Eating Disorder Coalition, child advocacy orgs, the freaking American Psychological Association, LIZZO!!!! supporting this. It needs IMMENSE levels of backlash from us, the grassroots, the people.

The best way to fight back is to CALL YOUR SENATORS. It's now going to go to the commerce committee for markup, after it will head to a vote. This is going to be fasttracked and most likely voted on this month or June. It's all hands on deck.

Link to call script to read off alongside numbers to call:

A bunch of petitions you can sign (takes less than 5 min)

Open Letter Against KOSA

Petition 1

Petition 2

Petition 3

Petition 4

Resistbot: Text PHJDYH to 50409

And more information here: Linktree

This is a great TLDR article to read: Vox Article

TLDR; Congress's new bill KOSA that has an immense amount of bipartisan support will lead to internet censorship by giving all state attorney generals, even the ones in Texas and Florida, power to sue websites for "harmful" content and decide what is "dangerous" for minors, force websites to make you upload your govt ID online, and lead to widespread abuse of queer youth. We have to fight back NOW or else we will see an internet-wide purge of any adult and queer content online, globally.

#earn it act #KOSA #kids online safety bill #internet censorship #restrict act

1K notes · View notes

leclsrc · 1 year

Text

reciprocate ✴︎ mv1

genre: 18+, pwp, very very filthy, fem!reader

word count: 4.5k

You have trouble maintaining your vow of Max celibacy when you’re on vacation together. (part 1 here)

nsfw warnings under the cut!

18+ because… sexual tension like tons, dirty talk, masturbating, descriptions of sex, kissing, SEXUAL TENSION.

hope you like it everyone! :) req’d and i was gonna make this a drabble, but it kinda grew. kind of gives way for a part 3, so lmk if u would wanna read thaaat...?

You’re bored more than several times over the dry, chilly stretch of winter break.

With not much to do, you’ve taken to traveling before you settle back into reporting on what different teams are doing to prepare for March. It’s all car prep, helmet design, new advancements, some drama on budget breaches. But that all comes in the condensed end of February, so now you’re wandering around, aimless.

The invite comes after Christmas and before New Year’s. It’s also last minute, and you would’ve normally rejected it, but Lissie had managed to convince you despite yourself, so you text Daniel a thumbs-up, greenlighting his proposition to jet off to Monaco.

“I’m starting to think I should’ve just said no,” you mutter, dumping a bundle of clothes into your suitcase. Across you, equally busy, Lissie scoffs.

She looks up from where she’s busy folding something, then, “In what universe would anybody want to pass up on a free Monaco trip where we can spend the entire week drinking our body weight in cocktails and swimming it off?”

You laugh, nodding in semi-agreement. It’s not Monaco, you want to tell her. It’s because everybody’s going, even Max. “You’re right,” you say instead, making a show of being excited.

It didn’t seem the slighest bit sane to be going on a non-work trip where Max was going to be around. Your first tryst, barely a month ago, before the grand prix in Abu Dhabi, had given way to three days straight of retiring to his room, foregoing afterparties, and then, after deciding to go to one, sneaking back off and fucking in his room after just an hour of dancing.

Max is just as insatiable as you are, and it scares you—because it took every ounce of resistance from you to sit him down and affirm the statement that the constant sex was a bad idea. Outside of his room, outside his bed, you two still maintained the same caustic relationship, but the sex became like clockwork, and you could tell it wasn’t the best idea.

“We need to stop the sex,” you’d said, setting it down firmly. “It’s—it’s getting in the way of work.”

“It really isn’t. You still have no problem calling me out after races and then getting fucked less than an hour later,” he said.

“I’m serious, it is. And if not now, it will.”

He’d shrugged. “Fine.”

“It’ll be easy,” you’d said sharply. “For me, at least.”

It feels like cosmic karma, then, when you’re told by Lissie that Max’s room is beside yours.

—

Almost funnily, Max’s is the first face you see after you’ve settled in your hotel room. You see him first, and then notice he’s joined by Daniel and Lando, at the bar near the beach where everyone else in your little group is hanging out. You make eye contact that you tear away from instantly, willing yourself to ignore him.

Daniel notices you first when you show up to order yourself a drink. “Swam yet?”

“Nope,” you say. “Think I’ll join the girls and tan today.”

“Just glad you finally accepted the invite,” Daniel comments. “Lissie told me you almost bailed for some weird reason.”

Your eyes dart over to Max, who’s drinking whiskey. He’s already looking at you, gaze cutting. You clear your throat and look away. “I thought it wouldn’t be the best idea, but I’m about three drinks away from loving it here.”

The small talk continues, and you even get your drink, but eventually Daniel and Lando are too enticed by the sunset water, running off and yanking their shirts off on the way. You shuffle nervously on the barstool, just two seats apart from Max.

“You’re here the whole week?” He asks, not looking at you.

“I am,” you say, leveling his tone of nonchalance.

He makes a noise of petty disapproval, leaning back. From where you sit, you get fleeting glimpses of how he looks, and it isn’t helping your vow of celibacy. He’s big, which, while you knew this, still sends a throb of arousal through you. The tight tee he wears does nothing to hide what’s underneath, and his arms give you the impression that he could just throw you onto a bed or slam you against a wall like it’s nothing.

(Two things you could personally attest to, but that’s besides the point.) You’ve only just begun to get used to not having sex with him, but you’re starting to think you should get on the next flight off, because the thoughts creeping into your head of his hands, his tongue—

A cry of your name grabs your attention, and you blink, turning your head. Farther up the beach, Lissie and Lily are waving their hands around, calling you. “Let’s swim!” Lissie orders. “Now!”

“Bit busy there, were you?” Max asks, smirking.

“Don’t know what you’re talking about,” you say, downing the rest of your cocktail and jogging over to your friends. Absently, you hear him chirp another teasing remark behind you—hope you drown. The abrasive remark lets the remainder of your scandalous thoughts filter out for the time being. You’re positive, though, that they won’t be gone for the whole two weeks.

You stop in front of Lissie to undo the clip in your hair when Lily asks nonchalantly: “Why’s Max staring at your ass?”

“Lil, oh m—” You swat her playfully. “Don’t just say things like that!”

“Sorry! Jesus. It was a serious inquiry. Guy’s eyes are glued. Don’t you hate each other?”

You resist the urge to turn around and maybe get in a dig of your own, but clear your throat and shrug. “You’re hallucinating. I’m sure he’ll have some random girl in his hotel room later tonight, anyway.”

You don’t miss the way Lily’s face is still etched with lack of conviction, but you tug her toward the beach anyway, splashing around and playing frisbee with the Daniel, Charles, and Lando. At some point, talk of clubbing arises through the six of you, and at Lando’s insistence, you all agree to meet up somewhere to get hammered later. A warm Monegasque welcome, Charles had dubbed it.

A sluice of nerves slide across you when you hear Charles relay the idea to Max, and the latter reply with a fuck yes count me in.

You learn a few short hours later that Monaco lives up to its predestined reputation as a nightlife beast, greeting you with vigor and sophistication. You’d been here before, but mostly for work—the immense drinking, dancing, and occasional drug is still a novel experience. Evidently, though, the drivers have little trouble settling into it, accepting and ordering shots and extravagant bottles like they’re nothing.

You’re off work, you figure, and you have no concrete responsibilites tied you as of the moment, so why not join in?

Lissie is drunkenly slurring something into your ear, about how some guy is flirting with her but he’s a 6 at best and maybe I should just make out with him to make him feel better hey wait maybe he’s an 8 actually no 9, maybe 9.5 max—no he’s a 10 I’m fucking him bye, and Lily is pissed, likely being taken care of by Alex.

Charles had upheld a promise to remain sober, but said nothing of bringing a girl home, which he’d successfully pulled off just twenty minutes ago. Lando’s obviously busy spinning the tunes at the DJ booth behind you, howling with excitement every time he plays something he likes. Which, you realize, leaves you with Daniel.

You fix the hem of your tiny dress, throwing back another shot. Your tolerance doesn’t allow for alcohol to permeate fast; it goes slowly, and never results in too much of a headache, thank the Lord. You’re pleasantly buzzed, but you want more courage, more gravitas. A timely wish, considering you haven’t quite learned how much of a party monster Daniel is.

He leans in closer. “I bet you three shots of vodka you’re not kissing someone tonight.”

“I’ll take the opposing side,” you say, laughing. “Nobody here is doing it for me.”

“A gentleman’s agreement!” He hollers, waving a passing waiter over and ordering shots for people to share.

Although you’re in a roped off area of the club, there are still people walking around and crowding the area, including a girl who’s seated on Daniel’s lap. She whispers something mumbled and low into his ear, and you roll your eyes at his equally flirty response, pinching her thigh and kissing her neck.

He turns back to you after, like it’s a casual conversation. “How can nobody ‘do it for you’ in a Monaco nightclub, man?”

There’s a question you can answer, but woefully won’t. You change the subject instead, cupping two shots. “How about you and I just do three shots each?”

“Make it four,” he says challengingly. “And take a hit.”

“Already did, Danny,” you refute. You’d smoked half a joint before drinking anything, not wanting to get too caught up in the crossfade. You’re half sure somebody in the group took molly, but your mouth is zipped all the same. “Come on, four shots.”

“Up, up,” he pauses, thinking. “Two shots of Patron vodka—and two of Clase Azul.”

Agreeing, you search for the liquor on the lit-up table, throwing the vodka back with relative ease and then standing up to do the last two. You stumble when you place the glasses back on the table, shaking hands with Daniel and moving about to shake off the alcoholic taste in your mouth.

You pass by Lando, and he flips you off from his place at the DJ booth, but eventually you meander your way to the bar instead, wedging yourself into an empty alcove that only houses a storage room door. It’s quieter, and here you can start to feel the alcohol in your system. You lean back against the wall, and just as you wished, a guy eventually approaches you.

He’s cute(ish), tall(ish), and charming(ish), and even in your hazy mind he registers as passable and definitely way too drunk and overconfident to be approaching somebody as hot as you. His arm wraps around you, toys with the flimsy strap of the minidress you’d worn today. His accent is clearly touristy and American when he asks, “What, bored tonight?”

“Little bit,” you say lowly, leaning back and letting your lips curl up into a smile. “Nothing is really exciting.”

He hums drunkenly. “I could be exciting. Show you something exciting.”

“Oh, I’m sure,” you say, playing into him. “Tell me more.”

“I could tell you lots of things in my hotel room.” He smiles. “Don’t you want to have fun?”

“She’s had plenty, mate,” a voice unmistakably Dutch says, and pride wells up in you for having had your plan succeed so beautifully. You blink, reaching an arm out to gently push the guy out of the way—and meet eyes with the one behind him. Taller, broader, and evidently more sober than either of you, Max looks pissed (more than usual, at least.) “Piss off.”

“Christ, had I known she had a boyfriend, I wouldn’t’ve approached, man. Let’s all be calm.”

Max waves him off dismissively and approaches you, a glint of concern shadowing the irritance in his eyes. “This some kind of plan of yours?”

The alcohol has begun to rush through you. You’re hot, flushed all over, thinking of all the times you’d been in this position, purposely testing Max’s limits so he could test yours, albeit differently.

“Dunno what you mean,” you say. Your gaze slips downward, to the big, rough hand wrapped around the glass of whiskey. You want them on you. Then they meet his again.

“Sure,” he says, unconvinced. “You’re having a lot of fun prancing around like you’ve no responsibilities.”

“Lighten up,” you insist boredly. “It’s called a vacation. It’s for letting loose.”

“Are you letting loose enough?” He asks, suggestive.

“Max.” You lean forward, and the movement lets him see more of your chest, or what your dress allows. He coughs.

“No.” But despite himself, he’s leaning downward, too, his gaze stuck on your lips. “You told me yourself. It gets in the way of work.”

“This isn’t work,” you say, nerves hammering through you.

“Been looking after you all night, it might as well be.” His voice is cold and serious. He steps forward, effectively caging you against the wall with how bulky his frame is. “You need to be careful. I had to pry that asshole off of you.”

“What if…” You trail off, tilting your head back so you’re making searing, unbreaking eye contact. “That’s exactly what I wanted?”

You’re both frozen in place, staring up at him with the kind of coy you only get when you’re tipsy like this. Wide eyed, lip bitten, and dress riding up—this is exactly how Max likes you. Ready for him to wreck. One jerk of his knee in between your legs and you’re his. He considers other options: a light grip around your neck, or even just a hand on your waist would render you weak, too.

“You test me too much, Y/L/N.” You feel hazy from the way he says your name, in the way he always does—formal, professional, like you’re in the paddock interviewing him again. You can feel yourself growing wet.

But you’d gotten yourself into this mess. You wore this dress, took those shots, let that guy flirt with you in hopes that Max would come over and give you his time of day. Deny as you might, you know deep down this is exactly what you were waiting for. You press a palm to his stomach, feeling the hard surface there, fisting it in his shirt.

He grunts, lets his hand cover yours. “Schatz,” he says, guttural.

He lets your lips meet, but when you lean in for a proper kiss, he stands back up to his full height. One look in your eyes lets him realize you’re sufficiently sober, and he turns and walks away.

—

A volleyball hits your shoulder for the third time today.

Prior to that, it’d hit your forehead twice, putting an effective end to your beach volleyball winning streak. Beside you, Lando lets out a strangled cry of defeat.

“The volleyball legend is tapping out!” Daniel hoots from a nearby lawn chair, mimicking the racing commentators you’re all familiar with.

“Piss off,” you say. “I’m off my game, too tired.”

You wave a dismissive hand to Lily and Alex and they flash thumbs up signs. You squeeze a bottle of water into your mouth, needing release from the thoughts plaguing your mind. The events of two nights ago weigh terribly heavy, annoyingly so, on your mind.

Not Max himself, you argue. His voice. His touch. They’re so irresistible to you. The way he’d grunted out the pet name he reserved for sex, the way his hand was so much rougher, bigger than yours.

Absently, you wonder, if he hadn’t stopped it—what would’ve happened then? He must’ve been resisting his strongest demons to put an end to the flirting like that. Any other time, you think, it would’ve gone differently.

He’d crowd you against the wall, press hot, whiskey-flavored kisses to your neck. He’d drop his glass, uncaring if it shattered; he could pay for fifty of those and then some. You picture his big hands roughly feeling you up, pressing against your panties, asking if you wore them just for him. Mumbling about wanting to taste you, get on his knees and have your pussy right here, for his tongue only. You picture his fingers, nimble, yanking away the lace and pushing into your cunt, kissing your jaw, moving, moving, until you’re fully in an open-mouthed kiss, messy and dirty, just how he likes you. He’d say something mean. Do you enjoy being a slut, letting all these people watch me take care of you? You’d nod. It’s true, you do, humping his fingers and chasing release. You picture his dick, hard and thick, big like the rest of him, pressed against your bare thigh, and—

“Your gelato!” Lissie hollers crankily, waving a cone of coffee ice cream in front of you that’s begun to melt and stick to her fingers.

“Thinking of sum’in, mate?” Lando’s amused, sunglasses-clad face comes into view.

You flip him off and apologize to Lissie, attempting to enjoy your ice cream before you descend into a state of craziness. The beach day passes with additional moments of blank stares, though none to a worrying degree. Most of your friends chalk it up to you waking up late or spacing out thinking of work, thankfully.

But, at least, you think. At least this just proves that you and Max can stick to your vow of celibacy. Right?

—

Max is never usually one to eavesdrop, but when he learned from Lily earlier in the week that your room was adjacent to his, he couldn’t help but become more conscious of it. Two days of silence, the occasional TV noise, and some stumbling provide nothing, so he’s since stopped paying attention. Between you two, you’re the one always out on the shore anyway, so there’s nothing much for him to listen to.

Tonight is different.

You don’t usually make noise—and he’s generally speaking here. You’re not a loud person. Even with the aid of a mic, your voice is composed, on the edge of quiet, during paddock reports. So why can he hear you so clearly now? The walls are a bit thin, sure, but something else contributes to it.

Something else, like maybe you’re doing all this on purpose.

The shuffling on the other side of the wall grows louder, then he hears your faint, breathy whimpers. He pauses, sitting a bit more upright on his bed, curiosity piqued, anticipates something else. Your whimpers grow louder, passing through the walls with relative ease.

He could totally tune this out, maybe put on a movie, hell, leave the room for a late night walk or a drink somewhere.

But he’s rooted to his spot, listening intently, wanting to hear more of you. He hears it then, so breathy at first he almost doesn’t. Max.

Your moan. He blinks, feeling himself grow hard. Maybe he didn’t hear it right, but then he hears it again: Oh, Max. Please. Wanna, wanna—

He palms at his dick through his sweats, swearing under his breath. You sound exactly like you do when you’re underneath him, two lithe hands wrapped around his wrist, begging for release, for his tongue, for his fingers. You’d been so sure, so high and mighty when you sat him down and demanded the sex stop, but here you are fucking yourself on your fingers, moaning his name.

Barely even ashamed, he tugs his dick out, already drooling with precum. He uses it to ease the glide of jerking off. Max, you say again, louder this time, higher. He remembers your conversation clearly, your solemn voice when you told him you couldn’t ever have sex again with the way it interfered with your jobs. The way you slid in a snide remark about how it’d be an easy challenge for you.

He can’t help but be amused, fucking his fist and listening to your moans, growing in volume as you near your climax. He wants to ask if your fingers are as good as his, as his tongue, his cock. He knows you’ll say yes but think the opposite. You’ve always grown so weak around him.

Gonna cum, he hears again.

He pictures you writhing on your bed, eyes rolling back, fist half-bitten to try and silence yourself. Your thighs are probably shaking, brows knitted together, tongue lolling out—he jerks himself faster, panting, chest sweaty. It’s your last, loud moans that send him over the edge.

I’m cumming, Maxie, fuck—! He swears under his breath, cum spurting out all over his fist. He catches his breath, pursing his lips, squeezing his eyes shut. Tries to purge himself of his thoughts of how you might look right now and retreats into his bathroom.

It doesn’t work.

—

Lando personal phone 30s ago

Lissie wants her own bacardi and could you get doritos too x

And a box of condoms pls mate xx

“One more Bacardi and a bag of Doritos,” you dictate boredly. Who knew a high profile, all expenses paid vacation in one of the richest countries in the world would still entail the mandatory grocery run? “…And condoms.”

Max turns from where he’d retrieved the rum, a brow raised in question. “Sorry?”

“Lando, not me,” you defend, holding two hands up. You two had been the unlucky pair who drew short straws and were thus stuck with a long list of niche items in an empty convenience store not far from your hotel. Outside, the sun’s already gone, leaving behind traces of orange in an otherwise dark sky. The group had decided to stay nearby and drink instead of going out tonight, since you’d all been at a club basically every other night anyway.

You review each of your baskets. “Seems like this is all,” you conclude, “except the condoms, which we’ll get at the counter.”

“Did Lando specify a… brand?” Max asks, pacing to the cashier. There are already some on display, with varying features and sizes.

You recheck your phone. “Nope. Just get anything.”

“Alright, then.” Max picks up an XXL condom box and waves it around. “For Little Lando.”

Irritated, you roll your eyes. “Be reasonable, Max.”

“You said get anything!”

“You’re so annoying,” you fume. You catch sight of the cashier looking uncomfortable with the tension between you and Max and figure the situation needs to deescalate. “Okay. Fine. Whatever, just get something reasonable. Put that back.”

“I don’t know what you mean by ‘reasonable,’” he says teasingly, clearly trying to push your buttons.

“Just get a standard condom box.”

“What is a standard co—”

“Get the ones you normally use,” you say, realizing the words after they leave your mouth.

The cashier coughs.

Shrugging, Max grabs the familiar box off the shelf and tosses it, emptying both your baskets right after. His face is amused when he turns and you see him again, but you’re both wordless while the payment goes through and you exit together. The car ride back to the hotel is quiet, stuffy, and tense, your arms crossed over your chest and Max’s occupied with both of the plastic bags.

“I’m surprised you remember what condoms I use.” He says with a smug smile when you’re both in the elevator. He’s parked his car on the basement floor, so you need to get to the lobby. You watch the lights signify what floor you’re on, waiting desperately for the ground floor button to glow yellow.

Still annoyed, you humor him despite yourself. “Why’s that?”

It dings yellow right as he responds. “You’re always begging for me to cum inside you, anyway.”

The doors open but neither of you move. Max watches you grow flustered and take a deep breath. “You’re a sicko,” you declare, walking out. He follows you with a laugh, knowing he’s right.

You meet the group outside the lobby, where they’re already piling onto a yacht, big enough for everyone. It’s ridiculously huge and expensive-looking, bobbing softly by the dark water. Charles emerges from the upper tier and waves to you and Max with a goofy grin.

After you help spread and deposit the groceries on the table, you walk around, finally detaching yourself from Max’s side. Eventually drinks ebb around the group, shots and crude cocktails that are fed to you like water. Buzzed with warmth and courage, you move to the back of the boat where there’s a ladder to swim, grunting when you find Max already there.

You clench your cocktail. “What’re you doing?”

“Preparing to swim, what’s it look like?”

“Oh.” You pause. “I didn’t know you could swim.”

You down the rest of your drink, leaning against the side of the boat and watching as he sheds his shirt and jumps into the ocean. Some of the water splashes onto you, and it’s cold, sending goosebumps throughout your body. He surfaces, hair darkened from being wet and smile dopey. A few strands of hair stick up.

“Wanna join?”

“Over my dead body,” you say, taking a seat and dripping your legs instead.

“The water’s nice.”

“It’s frigid,” you counter. “You should be wearing a snowsuit, dumbass.”

“How mean,” he says, diving underneath and surfacing again. “You’re too chicken, is all.”

Emboldened, by the buzz of alcohol maybe, the music, or—most likely of all—Max’s teasing, you nod. “Chicken?”

You get up, legs dripping, and pull your shorts down, tugging your tiny tank top off right after. You’re left in your bathing suit, and watch as Max’s eyes lock onto your tits, spilling out of your bikini top. His gaze is slow on you, like it’s his first time seeing you like this.

You step onto the cool ladder to avoid jumping, your back turned to Max’s as you feel more and more of your body submerge into the freezing water. You turn, taking a seat on one of the rungs. Max swims toward you, wiping a hand over his face.

“Not a chicken. But I’m not going any lower,” you say firmly, in the water from the waist down. “It’s too cold.”

“I’m fine having you like this,” he says lowly, his voice thick with desire. He cages you in, two big hands on either side of the ladder. For leverage, your legs wrap around him. You’re so close together. After days, weeks, of resisting.

You release a shaky breath, staring at him, his shoulders, his hands.

“How’s your vacation been?” He asks, lips near your ear.

“Fine,” you say. “Fun.”

“Bring anyone to your room?” You shake your head; he persists. “So you’ve had no luck there, then?”

“None at all,” you say blatantly.

“S’that why you’ve been…” A hand leaves the ladder to squeeze your thigh. “Moaning my name while fucking yourself?”

Your eyes widen, blinking, undeniably caught. You open your mouth to formulate a defense but you can’t. “What are you talking about?”

“Aw, don’t be shy, schatz. You were the one who kept insisting we swear off sex, but I think you’re starting to miss me.”

He presses two fingers to the crotch of your bottoms, rubbing softly. It’s enough to let you whimper. “Max—”

“You keep prancing around in tiny bikinis, skirts, tops. Is it on purpose, hmm? I can’t stop thinking about claiming you. On my bed, my balcony, over any surface.”

He quickens his fingers, and you whine. It feels so good, reminiscent of how wicked he is in bed. You picture it—being bent over the side of the boat, his hands big on your waist, cock sliding in and out of you.

“Feels s’good, Max,” you breathe.

“Does it?” He asks, egging you on. You nod, gripping his wrist—your hand’s still circled around it when he yanks it away.

“But remember what you told me? Before the break?”

“I—fuck,” you mutter, frustrated. “Please.”

“They were your words, not mine, schatz,” he says, easygoing as he dives back underwater, leaving you alone and sexually frustrated. You curse lowly. It’s going to be a long rest-of-the-week.

#f1 #max verstappen #max verstappen x reader #max verstappen imagines #max verstappen drabble #max verstappen smut #max verstappen fanfic #f1 x reader

2K notes · View notes