#my sister scream “GAY?!” when she saw me draw this

[postalrue]

God I wish I were him (both)

#my sister scream “GAY?!” when she saw me draw this #she's says it's cause she thought they were hugging??? #she's literally a first grader 💀 (yes I did correct her and explain why you cant just say that) #dRUE #postal 1 #postal 1997 #postal 3 #postal dude

[bumblesimagines]

We All Have Secrets

Part 2

Request: Yes or No

TW: Homophobia, transphobia, biphobia

~

(Y/N) opened the fridge, taking out the orange juice. Maria watched him with a small smile, head resting on her fist as she took in the smell of bacon and eggs.

"I love having an aspiring chef as a boyfriend." Maria cooed, giggling softly as she watched him. (Y/N) chuckled, pouring her a glass of juice and placing it infront of her.

"These are the basics everyone knows how to do." (Y/N) reminded, turning off the stove and putting the plate infront of her. He sat across from her, handing her a fork. (Y/N) looked at his phone, picking it up and answering the call from Isabela.

"Yeah?" He asked, getting a bacon strip and taking a bite.

"Remember the hacker shit? Natalia, Raul, and Gerry were the assholes who betrayed me. They chose me." Isabela told him, huffing lightly. (Y/N) heard Isabela zipping up her bag. (Y/N) looked at Maria, licking his lips. Maria blinked, eyes widening as she stared at something on her phone.

"The hacker asked if I wanted revenge." Isabela said softly. (Y/N) put down his fork, rubbing his forehead as he sighed.

"Let's talk more at school. I'll see you there." (Y/N) said, hanging up and going on instagram. He saw the posts from the hacker, watching them. (Y/N) scoffed as he watched Pablo's video.

"What a piece of shit." He whispered, scrolling down to Natalia's video. Maria put her phone down, gaze flickering from place to place. She quickly ate and finished her juice, standing up and going to (Y/N)'s bedroom.

"Princess?" (Y/N) called out, standing up and following her. Maria glanced at him, changing out of (Y/N)'s clothes and into some clothes she had left behind from previous visits and nights over.

"I-I should be there for Natalia. God knows what she might be going through." Maria said, picking up her bag. (Y/N) nodded, changing as well and grabbing his keys.

"Come on." He smiled softly, grabbing her hand. They left the house, getting into (Y/N)'s car and driving to school. Maria's leg bounced from nerves. She anxiously nibbled on her bottom lip, looking out the window.

"Who do you think is Hunny Bunny?" (Y/N) asked, staring at the road. Maria blinked and turned her head, looking at him. Her lips parted as she shrugged.

"I'm not sure." She breathed out. (Y/N) hummed, a sigh leaving him as he shook his head. He drove into the parking lot, pulling into a spot and getting out. He could hear people talking about the videos, wrapping an arm around Maria's shoulders as they headed inside. Maria immediately spotted her sister, quickly approaching her and giving her a hug.

"What they said.. Wasn't true, right?" Maria asked, pulling away and placing her hands on Natalia's shoulders. Natalia scoffed, rolling her eyes and pushing Maria's hands away.

"Of course, Maria." She crossed her arms, glancing at the other students. (Y/N) noticed Isabela walking in, heading towards the lockers.

"I'll see you in class, gorgeous." (Y/N) said, pecking Maria's temple and jogging over to Isabela. He caught up to her, gently grabbing her arm. Isabela turned her head, noticing him and sighing softly. She pulled him into a classroom, arms crossing as she leaned against a desk.

"Natalia, Gerry, and Raul were behind it. I can't believe them! They sacrificed me to save their owm asses." Isabela shook her head, tapping her foot on the ground. She bit her bottom lip, eyes watering.

"They were supposed to be my friends. I wouldn't have saved my ass. I would've had my own secret revealed to save them. I guess the truth's out. Natalia's a thief, Rauls dad is a corrupted politician, Gerry's gay, and Pablo is a cheater." Isabela shook her head, sighing deeply. She looked at (Y/N), eyes softening.

"I know you love Maria. You can stick by her and Natalia-"

"No, Isa. I've known you longer than any of them. I love Maria but she'll support Natalia like always. I'll support you. You know Maria supports you as well. She just doesn't want to hurt her sister." (Y/N) shrugged lightly, running a hand through his hair. He placed a hand on Isabela's arm, giving it a gentle squeeze.

"You'll always have my support, Isa. Don't listen to what these nosy fuckers have to say." (Y/N) said, pulling her in for a hug. Isabela hugged him back tightly, sniffling softly. They pulled back and gave each other smiles. Isabela took out her phone to check her makeup, making sure it wasn't running.

"You're the person I can trust." She mumbled, fixing her hair. They headed to class when the bell rang, entering and getting their lab coats. (Y/N) sat down beside Maria, gaze briefly locking with Javier. He looked away, sighing softly. The classroom was mostly silent, tension high in the air. A lot of things had been revealed over the span of two days.

"Jeez, why is everyone so tense? The only who should be tense is Natalia." Rosita said, chuckling as she motioned towards the irritated girl. The boys snickered, earning glares from Natalia. Isabela didn't spare Pablo a glance, simply looking forward. Maria glanced at (Y/N), reaching over and taking his hand. The teacher, Gabriela, walked in, greeting the class as she walked towards the front. She noticed the silence and sighed.

"Look, I know all of us are a little nervous after what happened but let's try to stay focused in class today, alright?" Gabriela looked over them.

"Let's start by brainstorming ideas for the science project." She tugged on the bottom of the projector, letting it rise to reveal a drawing on the whiteboard with 'Pablo's giant dick' next to it. Snickers spread across the classroom. Gabriela scoffed, beginning to erase it. Pablo got up to help, mumbling things under his breath. Isabela rolled her eyes, tapping her pen on the table. (Y/N) snorted quietly, earning a nudge from Maria.

"You've never seen one that big?" Pablo asked, dusting off his hands and looking at the others.

"Why are you doing it? Why not let her do it? It's her dick." Gerry said, motioning to Isabela. (Y/N)'s small grin dropped, sitting up and glaring at Gerry.

"Shut the fuck up, Gerry." (Y/N) sneered. Maria gave his hand a squeeze, shaking her head lightly. Isabela scoffed and raised her hand.

"Gabriela, can I change partners? I don't want to work with Pablo." Isabela said. Gabriela nodded.

"You can work with Natalia. Maria can work with Pablo-"

"I don't want Natalia either." Isabela crossed her arms, avoiding Natalia's stunned gaze. "Can I work with (Y/N)?"

"Isa! I already told you I didn't steal anything!" Natalia huffed, frowning and glaring at her classmates. Gerry raised his hand, looking serious.

"Can I make a suggestion?"

"What is it?"

"I think Alex, (Y/N), and Ismael should work together. They'd make a diverse and open-minded project." Gerry said, shrugging as students laughed. Isabela stood up from her seat, walking towards Gerry. Gerry quickly stood and backed up.

"Isabela! My name's Isabela, asshole." Isabela snapped, glaring at Pablo when he got between them. (Y/N) got up, walking towards Gerry and grabbing him by the collar.

"(Y/N), baby, calm down!" Maria stood and went after her boyfriend, pulling on his arm. She glanced at Javier who tried pulling him back as well. Isabela pushed Pablo back, stepping away from him.

"(Y/N), let him go. Do it this instant." Gabriela ordered, glancing at Isabela and Pablo. (Y/N) let him go, turning and looking at Isabela as she pushed Natalia back as well.

"Don't touch me!" Isabela glared at them, continuing to back away from them. Gerry was pushed away from (Y/N) by Gabriela to keep them apart.

"Calm down your bunny, dude!" Gerry told Pablo. Isabela scoffed, eyes watering as she rolled her eyes. Gerry feinged surprise, hand covering his mouth.

"Oh my god. That's right! Ismael isn't your bunny, right?" Gerry asked. Isabela grabbed a testing tube, throwing it at Gerry with a frustrated scream. Gerry ducked, letting it shatter behind him. The classroom went silent.

"And that's Ismael!" Gerry laughed as Gabriela grabbed him, pushing him towards that door.

"That's enough! All of you to the principals office!" Gabriela shouted at them, pointing towards the door. Isabela took off the lab coat, tossing it to the side and leaving the classroom. (Y/N) followed after, walking out of the classroom. Natalia, Pablo, Gerry, and Javier followed after.

"Miss-"

"You stay here, Maria." Gabriela breathed out, pushing her red curls away from her face as she panted softly.

(Y/N) plopped down beside Isabela, hands in his pockets. He sat up and scooted closer to her when Javier sat beside him. Javier noticed, jaw clenching but he stayed silent.

"That's one way to skip class." (Y/N) muttered, tilting his head back. Isabela sighed, arms crossed and shoulders tense. Lulu, Quintanilla's secretary, looked over them with a disapproving head shake. They silently waited to be called into Quintanillas office. Sofia joined them, sitting beside Javier. Quintanilla opened his door, motioning to Pablo. Pablo pushed himself off the wall, entering his office. (Y/N) scoffed at the flirtatious look Lulu gave him when he passed by her.

"I always knew she had a loose screw." (Y/N) mumbled, toying with his hoodie strings. Isabela glanced at him, lightly shaking her head.

"Bet it's drier than the Sahara down there." Isabela mumbled with a small grin, earning a chuckle from (Y/N).

"(Y/N), can we talk later?" Sofia asked after leaning forward. (Y/N) looked at her, nodding. He glanced at Javier before looking forward again. Sofia shifted her gaze onto Isabela. The two quietly spoke before Isabela was called in. Sofia stood and took her spot, giving (Y/N) small smile.

"It's been a while since we've hung out." Sofia said quietly. (Y/N) licked his lips, shrugging as he gave her a small grin.

"Yeah, we haven't had a depressing conversation on the roof in forever." They chuckled. Sofia smiled and sighed, running a hand through her short hair. (Y/N) wrapped his hoodie string around his finger, gaze drifting to the ground.

"What do you want to talk about?" (Y/N) asked, brows furrowing. Sofia looked at him, licking her chapped lips. She glanced at the others, leaning in slightly.

"The hacker's identity." She explained quietly. (Y/N) hummed, nodding slowly. He glanced at Javier when he stood up to get a cup of water.

"I don't think you'd do something like this." Sofia said, giving him a small smile. (Y/N) looked at her, cocking a brow.

"And why not? Am I not smart enough to be a hacker?"

"Yeah, basically." Sofia nodded, laughing when (Y/N) scoffed and gently pushed her. He looked up when Isabela left the office, letting the door slam behind her. She mumbled things under her breath as she passed by. Javier sat down, watching her walk away. Quintanilla called for Natalia but Lulu reminded him of a meeting.

"Luis mom is here cause her son's backpack was peed on." Lulu explained. (Y/N) immediately looked at Gerry, scoffing and shaking her head.

"You've got to be a certain type of breed to pee on people's stuff like an animal." (Y/N) said under his breath, leaning forward and resting his arms on his knees. Natalia entered Quintanillas office as Sofia stood up to get water. (Y/N) stared up at the ceiling as he waited to be called. Natalia quickly rushed out of the office, earning odd looks.

"(Y/N), come in." Quintanilla called, nodding inside.

"Finally." (Y/N) whispered as he stood, walking into his office and sitting down. He rested his arm on the armrest, watching Quintanilla sit down.

"I'm surprised to see you here. You're usually a well behaved student. Now, I know Isabela is a good friend of yours-"

"Is Gerry gonna face any consequences? What he's doing can be considered bullying." (Y/N) cut him off, tilting his head. Quintanilla licked his lips, giving a small nod.

"Well, as far as I'm aware, this is a one time occurrence." Quintanilla shrugged.

"With Isabela, maybe. What about Luis? Gerry and his ass kissers always bully him. They peed on his fucking backpack. You would've made time for his mom. What kind of principal lets a bully get away with no consequences? Oh, wait... I know. The type who just wants to suck up to the parents of the rich kids. You know, I really hoped you were better, Quintanilla. You're just as incompetent as Lulu." (Y/N) shook his head, looking towards the window. Quintanilla cleared his throat.

"Where is this attitude coming from?"

"From exhaustion. When Luis finally snaps and does something stupid or Gerry decides to impress his friends by doing a shitty thing, it'll be entirely on you." (Y/N) stood, chair scratching loudly against the floor. He walked towards the door, opening it and grabbing the door handle. He pulled on it, making it slam loudly. (Y/N) dug his hands into his pockets, walking away. He glanced at the four remaining, giving a small shrug.

"Today's a great day." He grinned, heading downstairs. (Y/N) blew a raspberry, walking towards a water fountain. He drank some water, leaning back and wiping his mouth with his sleeve. He looked at Maria as she approached him. She wrapped her arms around him, gazing up at him.

"(N/N), what happened? What did you talk about?" Maria asked, frowning. (Y/N) shrugged, wrapping an arm would her waist and walking beside her.

"We talked about conversing before escalating things." (Y/N) replied, giving her a small smile. Maria relaxed, leaning against him and wrapping an arm around his waist.

"Isa probably already told you but Nati stole her phone and let the hacker have it." Maria said softly, still in disbelief.

"I can't believe my sister is not only a thief but a terrible friend." Maria looked up at him, giving his side a squeeze. (Y/N) looked down at her, smiling softly.

"I'm thankful I got with the better sister." (Y/N) grinned, laughing softly. Maria rolled her eyes playfully, giving him gently.

"Maria, I need your help!" The couple looked at Natalia with furrowed brows. Natalia looked between them, a frown on her face.

"Help me look for my purse. I think I left it in science class but.. I-I don't know." Natalia grabbed Maria's hand, pulling them along. (Y/N) sighed, letting go of Maria when they entered the science classroom. The three searched for Natalia's bag.

"How do you lose a pink bag?" (Y/N) asked, glancing under some seats. Natalia shrugged, continuing to frantically search.

"I'm not sure." Natalia breathed out. (Y/N) dusted off his hands on his jeans, standing beside Maria. The two watched Natalia, sharing a glance.

"It'll appear again, Nati. We need to focus on the Nona thing." Maria reminded as she faced her. (Y/N) wrapped his arms around her from behind.

"Maria, focus. Do you know how much that purse costs?" Natalia asked, frustrated. Rosita entered the classroom, letting a grin slip.

"Are you okay, Nati?" Rosita asked, tilting her head. Natalia spun around to face her.

"No! My purse is missing!" She huffed. Maria sighed, leaning back against (Y/N). Rosita clicked her tongue, pouting.

"Too bad they stole your purse. I'm sure you had to save up a lot for it." Rosita said, the fake pity clear as day. Natalia looked at her, slowly approaching her.

"You know where it is?" She asked quietly.

"What's the matter with you? Not everyone is like you." Rosita said. She grinned widely, blowing her kiss.

"See you around." She turned and walked away.

"Fucking bitch!" Natalia screamed after her, earning a look from Maria. (Y/N) chuckled, shaking his head and looking away when Natalia glared at him. He pecked the top of Maria's head before stepping away from her.

"So, where else have you been?" (Y/N) asked, tilting his head. "Maybe you left it somewhere else."

"I already checked my locker and the lunchroom. Rosita fucking stole it. She's such a bitch." Natalia muttered. (Y/N) took out his phone when it vibrated, looking at the text.

Javier W.

We need to talk.

#x reader #x you #x y/n #x male reader #x male!reader #control z #control z x reader #control z x male reader #control z x y/n #control z x you #Quintanilla #isabela de la fuente #isabela de la fuente x reader #isabela de la fuente x male reader #isabela de la fuente x y/n #isabela de la fuente x you #raul leon #sofia herrear #javier williams #natalia alexander #maria alexander #maria alexander x reader

[shewholovestoread]

Fear Street Trilogy Review

Beware, spoilers ahead.

I love horror movies but good horror movies are so hard to come by. Fear Street grabbed my attention as soon as they released the first trailer, it looked like a call-back to the slasher films of old, back when they were still good. And the best part was the apparent presence of lesbians, count me in!

Fear Street is based on the books by the same name by R. L. Stine, a lot of us remember Stine for another horror classic, Goosebumps. The Fear Street novels were aimed at older audiences and were way more bloody than Goosebumps- lots of teenagers dying. The films don’t adapt any particular book but rather the tone and rough setting and I think that works to its advantage.

The Setting:

Fear Street is based on the fictional town of Shadyside, the poorer and more unfortunate twin of its sister-town Sunnyside. Sunnyside is sunny, wealthy and where nothing bad ever happens. Shadyside in contrast is poorer, the homes more run-down and where, every few years, some resident snaps and goes on a murderous rampage, killing their own friends, family or whoever they can get their hands on. There are those who believe that Shadyside is cursed by Sarah Fier, a witch who was hanged in the 1600s when she cut off her hand and used it to curse the town.

Fear Street Part 1:

1994 functions like the introduction and set-up for the trilogy. It introduces us to the characters, Deena (Kiana Madeira), Sam (Olivia Scott Welch), Josh (Benjamin Flores Jr.), Kate (Julia Rehwald) and Simon (Fred Hechinger). They unwittingly trigger the curse when they stumble across the bones of Sarah Fiers, soon killers are chasing them, killing-machines powered by the curse and who can’t be killed. Deena, Sam, Josh, Kate and Simon have to put aside their differences and work together to survive the night.

Fear Street Part 2: 1978

1978 opens with the survivors of 1994 going to C. Berman (Gillian Jacobs), the lone survivor of the Camp Nightwing massacre. It provides insight into the massacre that saw dozens of Shadyside kids being killed. 1978 takes us back to the day leading up to the bloody night. We meet the Berman sisters, Ziggy and Cindy (Sadie Sink and Emily Rudd respectively), Alice (Ryan Simpkins) and Tommy (McCabe Syle) When an axe-wielding murderer starts butchering the camp residents, Cindy and Alice, while trying to escape, stumble into the cave system that runs under the camp and discover Sarah’s hand and that the only way to break the curse is to reunite the hand with her body. However, they are unable to break the curse when they realise that the body is not buried where they thought it would be. Alice, Cindy and Ziggy are killed by the cursed murderers with only Ziggy being revived thus being labeled the lone survivor. In the present day, Deena and Josh dig out the hand from where Ziggy and Cindy left it, when Deena reunites the hand with the body, she sees visions of Sarah Fiers, leading us into the third and final film.

Fear Street Part 3: 1666

1666, the year it all started. We see the events play out leading up to the hanging. Deena is inside Sarah’s body, seeing and experiencing her life as if it were own. We learn that it was never Sarah’s curse, but in fact it was the Goodes who had made a deal with the devil, securing power for themselves (their descendants are the mayor and sheriff in 1994) Sarah Fiers was just the scapegoat. Every time someone saw a vision of Sarah, she was trying to show them the truth and un-dead killers hunted them to keep them from exposing it.

The films work individually but their impact really hits home once you’ve watched all 3. Leigh Janiak crafts such an intricate story and links 3 time periods, weaving them through each other seamlessly. With 3 films, she also has the time to invest in these different time periods and the characters that inhabit them.

The story, both in terms of individual films as well as the trilogy as a whole, is engaging and engrossing. It keeps the audience on their toes and the edge of their seats, waiting and dreading as the bodies pile up. Janiak also grounds the story so that it feels real even as the characters are fighting off un-dead killers, adding to the nail-biting tension.

There’s plenty to admire for a horror film buff, from the Scream reference in 1994, to Friday the 13th in 1978 and The Witch (or VVitch) in 1666. There’s also a good amount of gore to be found along with some really inventive ways of killing, who knew bread cutters/slicers could be so menacing.

There’s so much attention to detail in terms of costume and production design that you really feel like you’re in 1994, 1978 or even 1666. All of these work to draw you in as the viewer, adding to the authenticity on screen. The clothes and places feel lived-in. The song choices are amazing with popular hits from 1994 and 1978, the soundtrack definitely elevates the visuals. The original score in 1666 was absolutely gorgeous, especially Deena and Sam’s theme.

The sequence of the films with 1994 being the first, followed by 1978 and finally 1666 was a great choice with each film revealing a little more of the puzzle till all the pieces are revealed in 1666. It keeps the tension alive and keeps the characters and the audience constantly guessing. It also allows Janiak to sprinkle just enough subtle clues that become apparent when rewatching the films.

The characters are one of the best things in the trilogy, they are so well written, and I mean that for almost all of the main cast which is rare. One of the best things that Janiak does is repeat actors, especially the principle cast. For instance, a lot of actors we see in 1994 and 1978 appear in 1666 playing different roles but with a similar dynamic. It helps tell the story without worrying about too many new faces and worrying about whether or not the audience will be able to keep track of them. The return of old faces also ensures that the audience is already a little invested in them and their well-being.

Small side-note: I really appreciated that there was no sexual violence. It always worries me when I start a horror show/film and it was such a relief that they did not go that route. There is a lot of violence and a lot of people and kids die but it’s always just slightly campy enough that keeps it from being genuinely disturbing.

One of the things that always irk me with slasher films (especially the old ones) are how white they were, no characters of colour and if there were any, they always died. There were also no queer characters. Fear Street undoes that beautifully, all of our main characters are outsiders, they are people of colour, they are queer. In another film, they would have been nameless characters, among the first to die. Here they are the heroes. I loved all of them and I hated that Alice, Kate and Simon died, to be honest, I expected the core group to survive, Kate especially.

Fear Street is also unapologetically feminist and Janiak does this without it being too obvious. The central conflicts in the story are between women (sister/ friends/ ex-girlfriends) but they also band together and fight for each other. It’s worth noting that most of the core relationships are between women (Deena-Sam, Ziggy-Cindy-Alice, Sarah-Hannah) and those are not coincidences.

I loved how gay this trilogy was, Deena and Sam’s love for each other was the driving force and was at the heart of the story. Even in 1666, Sarah’s crime was not so much witchcraft as it was daring to love someone you’re not supposed to and fighting back against the proprietary nature of the men who sought to control them. Sarah and Hannah loved each other fiercely and we see that same love reflected hundreds of years later in Deena and Sam who fight for each other relentlessly. I also appreciated that Deena and Sam were exes instead of a new relationship. It meant that they already had history, they shared a familiarity and comfort with each other that a new relationship would have had to build onscreen.

The Fear Street Trilogy is one of the best horror trilogies I’ve seen in a while, each film is consistently great and delivers gore and violence coupled with immense heart. It has one of the best queer relationships I’ve seen on screen and spoiler alert, they get a happy ending. I’m sick and tired of lesbian women dying or separating because of realism. Damn realism, give me happy women loving women and who live through their traumatic ordeal. Watch Fear Street for them if for nothing else. Now excuse me as I prepare to rewatch the trilogy.

#Fear street #fear street trilogy #fear street spoilers #fear street part 1: 1994 #fear street part 2: 1978 #fear street part 3: 1666 #leigh janiak #fear street review #fear street netflix #Kiana Madeira #Olivia Scott Welch #Benjamin Flores Jr. #Julia Rehwald #Fred Hechinger #Gillian Jacobs #ziggy berman #cindy berman #Sadie Sink #Emily Rudd #Ryan Simpkins #Elizabeth Scopel #sarah fiers #Samantha Fraser #deena x sam #Deena x Samantha #Deena Johnson #josh johnson #Kate #Simon #wlw

[livsoulsecrets]

Kit Herondale Fic - Am I Enough?

Summary: Kit wonders if he has what it takes to be the big brother Mina deserves and goes to Alec for some advice, which proves to be really useful.

-

It was funny, Kit thought as he got up from Magnus’ fancy couch, leaving his parents happily chatting with Jace as he retold some of his favorite memories with Alec. Everyone saw Jace as this untouchable hero, an example of glory and fierceness, even Jace himself thought that, Kit was certain, but nobody was more worth of admiration to Jace than Alec, that much was clear in the way he looked at his parabatai for affirmation every time he spoke in public, the anchoring hand he would always lay on Alec’s shoulder before battle and the softness of the words whispered between them.  

Alec was Jace’s hero in every sense of the world. Alec was everything Kit hoped he could be to Mina, little Mina that would hang on to his finger like her life depended on it, who would smile at him every time he picked her up, Mina, who he would die for and live for and do anything and everything for. His light and wild rose, she was so much more than he deserved, but Kit was determined to be exactly who she needed.  

That determination is what kept Kit going as he walked into Magnus and Alec’s kitchen, finding the Consul of the Shadowhunters, the highest authority of their people, one of their most skilled and wisest members, with glitter all over his hair and a well-intended, but still tragically messy rainbow on his cheek, courtesy of his son, Rafael, who looked quite proud of himself.  

— Yes, now you are ready for the party! — Rafe announces, putting the paint-brush down.  

— Thank you for that, I am sure I look... — Alec stops, looking over to Kit, noticing his presence. — Interesting? — He completes, hesitant.  

— That is one way to put it. — Kit answers, barely containing a laugh.  

— He looks gay! — Rafael says, fiercely, crossing his arms.  

— I look what now? — Alec asks, confused, but still entertained.  

— You heard the kid. — Kit is laughing now, not being able to help it.  

— Gay, dad. Papa told me gay means happy as well! He said you would be gay twice if I made you happy on your birthday! — Rafael explains, looking offended his point wasn’t understood. — I know how much you like my drawings, so I made you a gay one, like the flag we bought last week. — Kit feels like he is intruding a lovely family moment, but he is too touched by Rafe’s dedication to miss the scene. Alec smiles and bows down to kiss his son’s forehead.  

— Gracias, hijo. — He says, messing his hair up in sequence. — I do love your drawings and I love you even more. — Rafe smiles back to his dad, pleased with himself. He gets off the table, where he was sitting to be able to paint his dad’s face, and runs to the living room.  

— He is adorable, you know. — Kit says and Alec smirks.  

— Yeah, he really is. I’m lucky. — Alec’s words are simple and direct, like many things about him are, but they stick with Kit. Before he met his family, he used to think love was a complicated, painful and disastrous thing, like what his dad seemed to feel for his mom and for Kit himself, like the lies and betrayal he saw in the Shadow Market, like the tricks he pulled as well. It was only after getting to know Tessa and Jem that Kit noticed love was quite simple, that good, real love was calm and peaceful and felt like home. The trust and the care he learned from them made Kit understand that loving somebody is not about the big gestures and dramatic moves, it is about knowing someone inside out and still staying, not because you desperately needed them, but because you desperately wanted them.  

Alec’s love for his family was a lot like the one Jem and Tessa had, the love they shared with Mina and Kit. That is what prompted Kit to come after Alec today, seeking some guidance in how to present this very same type of love to his little sister.  

— Alec, could I ask you something? I know it is your birthday and I don’t want to bother you, but I promise it will be fast-  

— Kit, just ask it. You’re not bothering me. — Alec cuts his rambling off and Kit is grateful for that, not even understanding why he is so nervous. Ever since he moved in with Tessa and Jem, he had met Alec many times and grew quite close with his family as well, since Tessa was one of Magnus’ oldest friends. If there was one thing he knew, it was that Alec could never be anything other than kind towards him.  

— Okay, sure. Good. — He answers, eyes casting down. — This is probably a weird question, but... How did you make sure you were the brother your siblings needed? Because, honestly, Jace and Izzy adore you and it seems so effortless to you that it blows my mind. I have known Mina her whole life, which is not much, you know? She is only one. But, for her, it is a lot of time! Still, I don’t know what I’m doing.  I feel like- By the Angel, like she needs so much more than I can give her. That is insane, I get it, her favorite word at the moment is poop and she adores to scream it at the top of her lungs every time we’re out, of course she doesn’t have great expectations right now, but she  will someday and I don’t think I will be able to be who she needs me to be. Will I even deserve all the trust she puts in me? All the love she gives me? Will I even-  

— Kit, stop. — Alec firmly demands and Kit is so shocked by the action that he finally turns to look at him. It is quite astonishing to find a sly smile on Alec’s lips. — Just stop, okay? You’re overthinking away too much, trust me: I have been there. It was never effortless to me, quite the opposite. I spent most of my life doubting I could be the right person to keep my siblings safe. When Max-  

He stops, swallows dryly, seeming to gather himself for what he is about to say before speaking again.  

— When Max died, I was destroyed. I felt like I failed him. Somedays I still do, so does Izzy, so does Jace. Still, I know Max would never think that of us, he knows Sebastian is the only one to blame for what happened. —  His expression softens for a moment and Kit hopes he didn’t bring out any hard memories on such a happy day. — What I’m trying to say is that you will never feel like you’re enough or like you know what you’re doing, it will always be hard and the idea of letting Mina down will always be scary. There is no running away from that.  

— So, I will just feel this terrified forever? — He is well aware of how disturbed he sounds, but can’t help it when Alec just dropped this bomb on him.  

— No, not if you learn one little thing, that took me many years to understand. — Alec’s voice is soft now; the tone Kit only ever saw him use around his family.  

— And what is that?  

— Mina already thinks you’re the everything she needs. She already thinks you deserve all the love and trust she gives to you. You know why? — Alec questioned and Kit just stared blankly at him, not knowing what to say. — Because, every single day, you get up and choose to try your best to make her happy and keep her safe. That is all she needs from you: to never stop trying. She doesn’t want you to drive yourself crazy or sacrifice anything for her. I once thought the same, I was sure I could never be myself or be happy, if I wanted my siblings to be proud of me. I thought that was the only way I could protect them. Angel, how I was wrong. All they ever wanted was for me to be exactly who I am. — He glares at Jace laughing loudly in the living room, Izzy rolling her eyes at him, but still smiling softly at her brother shortly after, and something shifts inside of Kit.  

That is what he wants for his and Mina’s future. He wants her to laugh at him until they are both out of breath, he wants her look at him with the just right combination of exasperation and affection, to still grab his hand when she is scared and run to his arms when she is happy.  

— So... You are saying that I should just be myself? — Kit queries and Alec nods, as if he just asked him if the sky was blue.  

— Yes, as cheesy as it sounds, just keep doing what you’re doing and I’m sure you will be fine.  

— But what if who I am is not enough, Alec? — His voice cracks and he hates how obvious his uncertainty is, but Alec doesn’t shudder.  

— Kit, you are more than enough. The fact you even question it already shows you are, that is why you care so much. Still, I know, better than most, that I can’t be the one to tell you that. Any words will fall flat if you don’t believe in it. Look, I wouldn’t worry too much about Mina if I were you. She already adores you. Maybe just focus on believing in yourself, make sure you see why she does. Do that, kid, and I can assure you all these doubts will vanish. — He lays a hand in his shoulder and squeezes it, dropping it shortly after.  

— That was really... Wise. — Kit blurted out, trying to absorb what he just heard.  

— Don’t sound so surprised. — Alec jokes and Kit can’t help but fell an overwhelming sense of gratitude settling in his chest.  

— Thank you for saying all of that. It really helped, like, you have no idea how much. — Kit thanked him; glad he had gone to Alec with his questions.  

— You’re welcome. — He calmly responded, just as Izzy entered the kitchen with an empty glass.

— Alec, where do you keep the wine? Because I’m sure Magnus is hiding the good stuff from me! — She claims, coming to rest against the door way.  

— If I told you where he keeps it, I will probably have divorce files on my desk by morning. — Alec playfully provokes his sister, that just waves his concern away with a hand.  

— Fine, for the sake of your marriage, I will just have you ask him for me. — Then, upon realizing Alec’s lack of interest in the idea, she pouts, moving to hang on Alec’s shoulder. — Please? — He looks down at her and sighs.  

— As you please. — She claps in excitement and kisses him in the cheek.  

— I’ll be waiting! — Izzy announces, before leaving the kitchen.  

— Are you good? — Alec asks Kit once his sister disappears into the living room.  

— I will be. — Kit answers and he is only half faking the confidence in his voice, so he takes that as a win.  

— Yeah, you will. — Alec confirms as he walks away, Kit on his tow. He drops himself back in the couch, deep in thought. He is startled when a tiny hand grabs his left leg. Once Kit looks down, he finds Mina holding on tight to him to push herself up. He smiles down at her as she stands, her grip on Kit so strong he wonders if that is some sort of Shadowhunter-Warlock baby superpower.

— Min-Min, you are getting though. — He proudly states. Mina giggles, as if she understands what he’s saying and puts both of her hands up, a common indication she wants to be picked up by him.  

Kit gladly does so, placing his sister in his lap. She wiggles her little feet up as she rests her head against his chest, one of her hands coming to grip the collar of his shirt. She must probably be tired, her nap time coming up, but Kit tells himself he’ll soon put her down in Rafe’s bed like Magnus offered, even though he knows he most likely won’t. He holds her against his heart as she dozes off, feeling her hand relaxing the grip in order to rest against his heart, her five little perfect fingers going up and down with every heartbeat beneath them.  

In that moment, he’s absolutely sure they’ll be just fine, not because he’s perfect or sure he will never make mistakes, but simply because he loves her away too much to be anything other than his very best self.  

#Kit Herondale #Kit Rook #kit herondale fic #Alec Lightwood #Jace Herondale #izzy lightwood #max lightwood #mina carstairs #jem carstairs #tessa gray #rafael lightwood bane #the shadowhunters chronicles #my fics #the dark artifices #the mortal instruments #ghosts of the shadow market #fluff

[hello-yue-here]

About your atla ship songs, I have a couple of questions (sorry if my phrasing comes out wrong, english isn't my first language and I worry it might across as accidentally defensive): how did you end up with the choices for zukka, jetko and yuekka (note: I haven't seen the great comet, so feel free to obsess over it, I'm intrigued now and the hype is appreciated!)? Sidenote: I think the mailee choice is HILARIOUS and the tokka one just make me sad, I didn't expect to be attacked like this😭

kdjfha;s i love you im gonna obsess SO HARD over great comet now. you may regret this

this is gonna be so long so the rest is under the cut whoops

yuekka: no one else from great comet

where do i even begin. WHERE DO I EVEN BEGIN

okay so background information on this show: it's based off of a 76 oages excerpt from war and peace and its centered around a woman named natasha (and this guy pierre but he's irrelevant to this song so we wont worry about him) and natasha's bethrothed is off fighting in the war right now. she hasn't seen him in a while but she is in love with him.

every single lyrics of this song SCREAMS yuekka to me. the innocence and purity of their love. the love at first sight. and even the melancholy ending just- i go apeshit for this song. i love this song so much. and denee benton's voice??? kljsdhflwksugf please listen to this song if you haven't already. listen to the whole show. your life will be changed forever.

onto the lyrics (i stg this is ab to be the whole song whoops)

"the moon"

THOSE ARE THE FIRST WORDS ON THE SONG. natasha and andre (her bethrothed) met underneath the moonlight. Sokka and Yue first spoke to eachother at night and always met each other for their most intimate moments under the moonlight. also yue is LITERALLY the moon so like: right of the bat with those two words it's yuekka.

"and i saw your eyes / and i saw your smile / and the world opened wide"

sokka fell in love with yue the moment he saw her in the canal. she literally enchanted this motherfucker. everything about her made his heart go crazy. and 'the world opened wide' to me is from yue's perspective. Yue had never left the north pole and sokka had seen a good chuck of the world at the point. He took her on appa, he told her about his adventures. he saw the world yue wished to see and you know damn well that Sokka would have done anything to give it to her.

"oh the moon /oh the snow in the moonlight / and your childlike eyes and your distant smile / ill never be this happy again / you and i and no one else"

natasha sings fondly about the moon and the snow, seeing as it was where she fell in love with andre. yue and sokka LITERALLY fell in love in the same place: in the snowy nothern water tribe under the light of the moon. childlike eyes: THEYRE CHILDREN!!! distant smile: this is where it gets a little sad. theyre both children with way too many duties during a world that has known nothing but war for the past century. they want to be happy but yeah, theyre smiles are distant and far away because happiness seems out of reach for them most of the time. i'll never be this happy again: the moments yue and sokka shared together were probably the happiest either of them ever were. they were able to ignore the war and the world in the moments they shared together. and with no one else. no one else would be able to give each other this sense of peace and happiness and love.

"joy and life inside our souls / and no body knows just you and me / it's our secret"

Yue and Sokka had to sneak out in secret at night to go and see each other. Yue and Sokka couldn't be together for real because Yue was already engaged, but they were literally in love so she decided to see him anyways in secret. kasdjfhklasjd im losing my mind over them at this point.

"this winer sky / how can anyone sleep / there was never such a night before / i feel like putting my arms around my knees / and squeezing tight as possible / and flying away"

these are my FAVORITE lines in the entire song. yue and sokka had never felt this strongly about anyone before and that's why they are so drawn to each other. they had never experienced love before and they wanted to hold onto it for as long as they could even though they knew they couldnt. Sokka takes yue up on appa and she is wistful and wishes she could live like he does every day: ie flying away. oh my god these two deserved so much better. so much fucking better.

now for the saddes part. the saddest fucking part.

"maybe he'll come today / maybe he came already / and he's sitting in the drawing room / and i simply forgot"

natasha misses andre so intensely at this point. when i first listened to this show and heard this song i was like "wait a min... is andre like... dead?" and im sure i wasnt the only person who assumed that this was why natasha felt so sad by the end of such a beautiful song. (spoiler alert andre is fine)

but this line really exemplifies how sad natasha is, and hints at the fact that andre may never come back. it implies that their relationship is doomed (at least in my opinion) and that's all yuekka. Sokka misses yue intensely when shes gone. Yue accepted her fate almost immediately but sokka was in denial. he thought there had to be another way. but in the end it wasn't meant to be. and sokka will go on, loving yue, wishing for her back, even though it's not possible.

fuck im gonna cry.

zukka: all i've ever known- hadestown

"i was alone so long / i didn't even know that i was lonely / out in the cold so long / i didnt even know that i was cold"

sokka is from the swt so theres where the cold comes in. also in the gaang (initially) it was just him katara and aang. and katara and aang were much closer to each other than sokka was with aang and the two of them were benders so sokka was kind of an outsider with the two of them. He also represses a lot of his emotions and feels the need to do everything himself so i do see a lot of loneliness in sokka. and the fact that so many people in his life have left him (his mom, yue, his dad, suki briefly, etc...) he is known to keep people at an arms length. i see a lot of loneliness in sokka.

zuko's loneliness is a lot more obvious: he has literally been cast out and abandoned by everyone except iroh. and even then he still feels the need to be alone (remember zuko alone? thought so) these boys look after themselves and push others away and revel in their loneliness in order to keep themselves from getting hurt. at least in my opinion on canon and also some fanon because id be a liar if i said fanon didnt influence how i view ALL my ships (not just zukka)

"all ive ever known is how to hold my own / but now I wanna hold you too"

COME ONE MANNNN, they just wanna hold each other. theyre both very big protectors as well and kljhflkasdhg they wanna protect eachother like kljdhfl im gonna lose it rn.

"You take me in your arms / And suddenly there's sunlight all around me / Everything bright and warm / And shining like it never did before / And for a moment I forget / Just how dark and cold it gets"

SUNLIGHT SYMBOLISM. zuko is literally powered by the sun. i don't think i even NEED to elaborate on this one anymore lol. They find comfort in each other away from all of their trauma. when they're together nothing else matters and i personally love that for them. they both deserve love.

"I knew you before we met / And I don't even know you yet / All I know is your someone I have always known"

these two are extremely similar in canon. many parallels. older brothers overshadowed by their prodigy little sisters. longing to make their fathers proud (granted one dad is good and one is fuckin evil), both are pretty bad with emotions. both are seen protecting others before themselves (sokka protecting suki during the serpant's pass, sokka protecting toph on like multiple occassions, zuko protecting katara in the final agni kai), the list goes on. they know who the other is because they see themselves in the other person. they already know each other because they are each other (in a way, not entirely, but the similarities are strong in my opinion)

"I'm gonna hold you forever / The wind will never change on us / Long as we stay with each other / Then it will always be like this"

i just think this line is so cute and sweet (ignoring all the symbolism and foreshadowing that comes with the last line in the musical itself. im gonna pretend this is nothing but happy) and i think these boys deserve happiness so yeah. this song is zukka to me lol.

jetko: thrill of first love- falsettoes

if you've never listened to this song go an do it now. you will know INSTANTLY that it is jetko because of the dynamics alone. marvin and whizzer are pure jetko and i take no crticisms.

marvin and whizzer are both extremely stubborn, and they don't always get along, and they fight a lot, and they get mad at each other a lot, and they are both passionate as hell, and they will bring this passion into everything. they love each other that is without a doubt, but they arent perfect and they are once again stubborn and determined as fuck.

sound familiar? it's literally jetko.

the lyrics aren't what remind me of jetko, but the dynamic itself. the lyrics are too on the nose for a gay couple in 1970's america so that rlly cant apply to jetko all that much. but the way these two characters bounce off of each other and get annoyed with each other and argue with eachother reminds me of jetko. because let's be honest: these two are the most stubborn characters in the whole show. they will fight for what they believe and it will take literally everything to change their minds.

i love jetko but i think they would have petty arguments all the time and get aggravated by one another so easily. and this is even seen in canon: they work so fucking well together but they did not even HESITATE to fight one another after neither of them would give in and let the fight about whether jet was right or wrong about zuko being a firebender. like i cannot say it enough they are stubborn as fuck.

but underneath all that stubborn pettiness and bickering: marvin and whizzer still love each other. and jet and zuko would still love each other. because even though they are stubborn when it comes to arguments, they are even more stubborn and determined when it comes to each other. these two passionate motherfuckers are in love.

(now when i chose this song i decided to ignore the fact that this song literally spells out the fact that marvin and whizzer's relatinoship is doomed because they literally say passion dies. thats the difference between jetko and whizzer and marvin because i dont think passion dies. i chose this song strictly for the bickering lmao)

and i know you didnt ask about tokka but,,,,

i rlly wanna talk about the tokka one

so im going to

tokka: on my own- les mis

look. i KNOW this song is about unrequited love and i love tokka as a couple but,,, the unrequited love in this song just SCREAMS unrequited tokka to me so thats what i went with.

eponine is a girl who has neglectful parents who lives life by her own rules: toph. eponine is shown to be tough and confident and spunky to others but behind all of that she has emotions, she feels love, she hides her vulnerability so much: toph. she is in love with a guy she cant be with because he loves someone else: TOPH

eponine is toph to a t and toph is eponine to a t. this is not up for debate lmao

"without him i feel his arms around me"

toph is always seen grabbing onto someone (and its almost ALWAYS sokka) when she's somewhere where she can't use her feet to see. FEEL and ARMS cmon. look at it.

"and i know / i know that he is blind"

COME ON. IMAGINE TOPH SINGING THIS LINE. this line is already powerful enough in les mis but having toph, a blind character, sing it just makes the symbolism even deeper. toph sees the potential relationship they could have together. toph sees that sokka is oblivious to this. toph is not blind to the truth or the potention, but sokka is blind to her feelings. im about to lose my mind over this line.

"I love him / But every day I'm learning / All my life / I've only been pretending / Without me / His world will go on turning / A world that's full of happiness / That I have never known"

i need to sit down for a moment. toph grew up in a household where her parents did not understand her. she has learned to hide her true emotions and vulnerabilities from everyone. and its the fact that toph knows that she and sokka will never be together and the fact that she still loves him in spite of that is what makes this even more heartbreaking.

"but only on my own"

TOPH AND EPONINE SWEETIES I LOVE YOU

thank you for indulging my theatre kid nonsense. you are very sweet and kind and lovely and awesome and i hope you have a lovely day bestie :) <3

ask me why i think these songs go with these ships

#asks #liv is a theatre nerd #liv is an atla nerd #yuekka #zukka #jetko #tokka #ask me about my ship songs

[mytwilightimagines13]

Life (Part Three)

Masterlist Pet Masterlist Rules

Headcanon requests: Open Imagine requests: Closed Taglist: Open

Taglist: @aro-is-gay-af @vamp-army @raindancer2004 @like-rain-or-confetti @volturidoll13 @kpopgirlbtssvt @avyannadawn @alexavolturisblog @alecvolturiswifeforever @imaginetwilight2704 @develin13 @wallwriterstuff @volturiwolf

Once again, Maeve could be found in a beautifull meadow, playing around with flowers. It had been almost 50 years ago since Maeve was changed. Maeve was forever gratefull for the power Hilda had given her. And she had used that power well to get her revenge. Furthermore had she used her gift to let flowers grow, or kill them off. She found her gift beautifull yet at the same time dark. She could give something from nature life, or kill them just by her own will. She had never tried it on a vampire, she was scared she might hurt one of her sisters if she tried. Slowly the sun was setting and Maeve decided to make her way back home. She had told her sisters she would only be out for a hunt, but then she came across the meadow and she couldn't help but to play with her gift. Maeve almost reached their small cottage when she felt something was off. She hid behind a tree and saw many vampires dressed in dark cloakes confronting her coven. "You are being accused of drawing too much attention with your large, savage coven." A blond vampire said, his red eyes gleaming with bloodlust. "Your accusations are false." Hilda said as she offered a vampire with long, dark brown hair her hand. The vampire took her hand and it stayed quiet for a moment. "I am affraid my dear that the accusations are true. Your coven has drawn too much attention and we can not let that past." The man said, a maniac smile forming on his lips. Hilda pulled her hand back fiercly. "Liar!" but that would be her last words as soon two Guards ripped her arm off while the blond vampire ripped her head off. Maeve gasped, quickly covering her mouth. "Heidi, my dear. Join us and you will be spared. Along with your dear sister Maeve. Where is she if I may ask?" the man with dark brown hair said. "She left the coven a few months ago." Mary said trying to defend her younger sister. "Tut, tut. It is not very nice to lie. Jane, go ahead my dear." Soon Mary's screams could be heard. Victoria glared at the Volturi. "Run! We have to get away!" Maeve didn't had to be told twice as she quickly began to run away, away from these monsters that killed her sister. Maeve ran for days until she was sure no one had followed her. She fell down to her knees, shaking and the grass below her turned black. Why did this had to keep on happening to her. She dry sobbed for quite a while until a sweet scent hit her nose. A vampire. Maeve quickly got up and glared at the stranger. His skin was pale and he had brown hair. His eyes where a blood red and looked at her like she was prey. "W-who are you?" Maeve asked. "My name is Demetri. I am the Volturi's tracker." Demetri said as he smiled at her. Yet this smile was sinister, and not friendly in any way. "Y-you killed my coven!" Maeve shouted, feeling more couragious than she truly felt. "They broke the rules. But my masters are quite forgiving. Join us and you shall be spared." Demetri offered. "Never." Maeve spat. "Pity." was all Demetri said before lunging at Maeve. Maeve easily dodged his attack. "Come and get me." Maeve said before running away. Demetri smiled. "Game on, darling." And that is how their little cat and mouse game began. For many centuries to come, Maeve would be on the run.

#alec volturi #demetri volturi #volturi #twilight

[isa-renee]

Secrets And Lies (And Quite the Surprise)

Alexander Gideon Lightwood, years deep in the closet and months deep into this particular lie, has approximately five minutes to find a fake girlfriend before this all blows up in his face. Enter one Clary Fray, friend to Magnus, stranger to Izzy, and the perfect candidate to fool his family. Really, it’s the perfect plan. So what could go wrong? 

read it on Ao3:

 Alec was in trouble. Major trouble.

 “So, big brother,” Isabelle started, sitting down across from him in the coffee shop. “How long until I can finally meet this mystery girl of yours?” She smirked as she took a sip of her latte.

 And there...well, there was the trouble. Namely that there was no mystery girl, that Alec secretly was gay as hell, and that there might in fact have been a mystery boy (not that his sister knew about Magnus of course).

 “Uhm well…” he started, trying to think of some answer that she might accept but drawing a blank. Oh no. This was not good.

 It had all started the month before when, fed up with his siblings’ constant pestering about his love life, he had caved and told Jace that he had a date one night. With a girl. This of course was a lie. (Well, the girl part. He actually had had plans to see Magnus.) And as lies are bound to do, it soon spiraled far out of his control. Jace had told Izzy, and Izzy, naturally, had not let him off the hook quite as easily as their brother had.

 The solution to his predicament? More lies of course! (What else?)

 So for the past month, he had pretended to have a girlfriend, carefully evading his siblings’ questions about her. And somehow it was working.

 Well, sort of. Partially. Maybe. A little bit. Okay actually the entire situation was getting way out of hand and it was not working at all.

 The good news? He’d had plenty of reason to sneak off and be with Magnus. He just had to tell Jace he was seeing his girlfriend and the blond would smirk and wish him luck. That bad news? Izzy was getting suspicious. And no good ever came from Izzy being suspicious.

 Which led Alec back to the coffee shop, and his now dire situation.

 “Alec?” he heard Izzy’s voice, a slight undercurrent of laughter. “Are you alright there? You spaced out for a second.”

 “Sorry,” he smiled sheepishly. “Just nervous,” he blurted out. Oh no.

 “Oh yeah? What about?” This was not good. “Are you actually going to let me meet Mystery Girl? Or at least tell me her name? Jace and I have started calling her Meg, you know. MG for Mystery Girl but that still took too long to say. But it would be nice to have an actual name.”

 “Uhmm…” Alec knew he had to say something, but his mind was blanking.

 Izzy smirked again. “Unless there's a reason you’re keeping her secret of course. Is she a professor? Are you dating one of your professors? You know I would have expected that from Jace but not you Alec.” She grinned at him, sensing his discomfort and hoping to lighten the mood, and he gave a weak chuckle. “Or hmm is she an undercover FBI agent? Secret service? Maybe she’s—”

 “Actually she’s on her way here right now.” Wait what?

 “Really?” Izzy asked, surprise evident on her face, but with a delighted look in her eyes. Oh God, what was he doing?

 “Yeah of course. I thought it was time you two met.” Crap crap crap crap crap. This had to be his worst idea ever. Why wouldn't the words just stop leaving his mouth?

 “She’ll be here in five minutes.”

 Oh, he was so screwed.

 So there he was, in a coffee shop with his sister, about to be caught in one of the biggest lies he’d ever told. Unless he thought of something in the next—he checked his watch—three minutes. Oh this was not good.

 Isabelle was talking to him still, something about a new friend she’d made, an artist or something? Honestly, he barely caught a word of it, caught in his worry spiral, desperately trying to find a way out of this hole he’d dug himself into.

 Izzy was still saying something to him, and he turned his head and saw a flash of bright red hair out of the corner of his eye. Clary, he remembered her name was, a friend of Magnus’ who he’d met a few times.

 And suddenly, he had an idea.

 He stood up, cutting Izzy off in the middle of her sentence. “Sorry,” he said, “One second and I’ll be right back.” He left the table and moved over to the line where Clary was standing. He tried to walk casually, though inside his head he was screaming, absolutely utterly freaking out at the sheer stupidity of his desperate plan. But, well, this was the only option he could see.

 He approached Clary with a wave, hoping she remembered him from Magnus’. She saw him and smiled as she waved back, so he really hoped she might be willing to help him out. If not, well, this would all be over sooner than he expected.

 “Clary,” he said as he approached her in the line. “Hi. I know we don’t know each other that well, and I’m really sorry to ask you for this, but I kind of need you to pretend to be my girlfriend for the next twenty minutes.”

 And she must have sensed the desperation in his eyes, because she leaned in close to him and grabbed his arm in the way a girlfriend might, obviously confused but trying to play the part. “Okay, explain.”

 And so he did. “So I’m here with my sister and it’s kind of a long story but she thinks I have a girlfriend and I sort of panicked and said she could meet her today. And the problem is that I don’t actually have a girlfriend. Because I'm dating Magnus. Because I’m gay. Which my sister does not know. And I know it’s a lot to ask but please I could really use your help here.”

 “You're dating Magnus?” And she sounded excited at the idea. “Oh I’m so glad, you two are always so cute together, and I had wondered, but he never mentioned it.”

 “Yeah,” he answered, color slightly coming to his face. “I’m not exactly out, which is the whole reason for all of this, and why he hasn’t said anything. But he and I have been together for a few months, just keeping it quiet for now.”

 “I’m so happy for you two! And yes, Alec, of course I'll do this. In the spirit of gay-lesbian solidarity of course!” She laughed as she said the last, and huh, Alec had never realized she was gay too. He had always assumed she was dating that boy she hung around. Simon? Was that his name? But apparently not. Whatever her reasoning, Alec was just glad for her help. “But I was actually here to see my girlfriend, so let me just text her that I’ll have to take a raincheck.”

 “Thank you!” he said, and wow did he mean it. He could have kissed her for gratitude. Well, if it weren’t for the gay thing. He supposes if he could have kissed her, that would have led to a very different afternoon. “This might actually work.”

 And, well, he should have known that it was too good to be true.

 He and Clary arrived at the table where Isabelle was sitting, though she seemed a bit hesitant to sit down there. Izzy, too, looked surprised, probably that he actually did have a girl here to meet his sister. He seriously could not believe how well his plan was working.

 He turned to Isabelle to introduce her. “Izzy,” he started, gesturing towards Clary. “Meet Clary, my girlfriend.”

 He pulled out the chair next to him for Clary to sit, only she didn’t move to sit down, just staring silently at his sister. And this did not bode well. Izzy was also just staring at him now, some expression on her face that he couldn’t quite place. And this was definitely not good.

 Isabelle turned from him to look at Clary, and the two locked eyes for a second, and he seriously could not puzzle out the expression on his sister’s face. Clary made some sort of noise to his left, evidently surprised by the sight of Isabelle for some reason.

 “Um, do you two know each other already?” Alec asked, by that point very confused.

 Izzy stared at Alec, then at Clary, then back at Alec once more. “Something like that,” she responded, and then she turned to Clary and. Winked? At her?

 And suddenly Clary just burst out laughing. She was doubled over in her laughter, and oh no this was so not good. What was going on?

 Izzy seemed close to laughter herself, though she tried to compose herself as she turned to Alec, doing her best to put on a serious face, though her grin managed to slip through nonetheless.

 “Alec,” she began, Clary laughing even harder as she tried and failed to use a serious tone. And oh this was not good, not good at all. Alec didn’t know what was wrong, only that something was, and that his plan somehow seemed to have failed pretty epically. How did they know each other? What was that wink for? Izzy continued, regaining herself after a pause. “Why, exactly, are you pretending to date my girlfriend?”

 And, huh. Well. He really hadn’t seen that one coming.

 Clary was still laughing, and Izzy had joined her too, by the time Alec had realized he should really say something. He opened his mouth to do just that, only he really had no idea what to say. Was there any way for him to fix this? Or would he finally have to admit to the truth, after his months of carefully constructed lies?

 He was so caught up in trying to find a way to fix the situation, that it didn't hit him until a few moments later, by which time Clary and his sister finally seemed to have calmed down.

 “Wait, girlfriend?!”

 Finally, after what felt like years but more likely was only about a minute, Alec found himself sitting at the table once again, with his sister across from him, and her girlfriend next to him, the two finally quieted down after his last comment had set them off laughing again. And it was official. There was absolutely no salvaging this lie. Oh, Jace was going to be unbearable when he found this out.

 “Yes, Alec, my girlfriend. The person I have been telling you about for ten minutes. And who came to this coffee shop to finally meet you, though it turns out you two are dating?” At this she turns to Clary. “You know, I could have sworn you said you were a lesbian. And now you’re dating my brother? Really?”

 Clary giggled at that, though thankfully it seemed the two were finally finished with their uncontrolled fits of laughter. “Oh I don’t know, Izzy,” she started, continuing in the joking mood Izzy had set, definitely no longer trying to actually pretend to date Alec. “He’s just so handsome.” She patted his cheek. “I just had to make an exception. I’m sure you understand.”

 “Well, good looks do run in the family after all.”

 The two started giggling again, and Alec knew he should say something, but found then he was having the opposite problem from earlier. While before, he couldn't stop words leaving his mouth, then, he found that he could not think of a single thing to say.

 Izzy seemed to notice how uncomfortable he looked, though, and she stopped laughing and turned to look at him, actually serious now.

 “Alec…” she prompted gently. “Okay, you obviously weren’t trying to make a joke, or you’d be laughing right now with us. What’s going on?”

 Clary sobered up at that too, realizing abruptly that, as funny as the situation was—and even Alec could tell, objectively, that it was pretty hilarious, though he was having a hard time feeling that to tell the truth—their plan had failed, which meant that Alec now had to find not only a new fake girlfriend, but an explanation for all of this, or else he would be outed to his sister, something he very obviously was not ready for.

 “It’s actually a really funny story,” Clary began, sounding surprisingly sure for someone thinking on the spot. “I’m good friends with Maia, who Alec is actually dating, and she wasn’t able to make it today, at the last minute, but she had realized that you and Alec were siblings and she had this great idea and–”

 “Clary,” Alec cut her off mid-sentence. She was doing a surprisingly convincing job of covering for him, and he was grateful for her in that moment. But he realized, as he was sitting there with his sister and the girl she was dating, that he really had nothing to worry about. And as he heard this new lie starting, he could so easily see himself going on with it, and getting deeper into it once again. He realized then that he didn’t want that. He didn't deserve that. He thought about lying again and realized that, for the first time, he was ready to tell the truth. “Clary, thank you. But I think I’m finally ready to do this.”

 So he turned to his sister. And she looked back at him, and he wondered why he ever worried about telling her. It was Izzy! Izzy had always supported him, in everything. Sure, she had always talked to him about cute girls, but finally he realized that that wasn’t her shoving him back into the closet, that was her coming out of her own. He could do this!

 “I’m not dating Clary. Or Maia. In fact, I’m not dating a girl at all.” He could do this. He could. “I’m dating a guy. I’m dating a wonderful man, and his name is Magnus Bane, and I really like him a lot, and I think you will too.” And it was done. He was out. (To Izzy at least, but he was out!)

 As he finished, the biggest smile came over his sister’s face, and she got up from the table and rushed around to give him a big hug right there in his chair. “I’m so proud of you,” she said softly into his hair, before pulling away to slide away and back into her seat opposite him. He looked up and saw Clary just beaming at the two of them, and was struck by the gratitude that his sister was dating someone so kind and, honestly, perfect for her.

 The plan may have failed epically, he thought, but everything still worked out alright in the end. He couldn’t wait to tell Magnus about it all.

#my fics #my writing #shadowhunters #tmi #malec #clizzy #i dont like tagging things but in case yall have stuff blacklisted #i finally finished this fic! which i started like two years ago lmao #this started off as humor but became pure self indulgent fluff by the end #anyways! thats all from me! i hope yall enjoy this! #also okay tumblr highkey broke the formatting so just pretend there are scene breaks here #or like just read it on ao3 lol #i did my best! but tumblr is confusing

[thiswaycomessomethingwicked]

I'm curious about "a history of dead women in the city" (and also the Wellington one, of course)

Yusss! 

“History of dead women in the city” - oh man one day I will write this. It's part of this world I'm creating called Babel and it follows this woman as she tries to figure out what happened to her sister who died years ago. 

 A long excerpt: 

Here is a scene from our childhood: It’s a sunny day. Dappled. Portrait worthy sun. It brings out freckles. We are in the courtyard, my sister drawing and me watching her draw. On a large blanket by the well sits our parents. Our mother is laughing, her arms entwined with our father’s, they are so in love. They do not notice us. It’s one of those loves that perfumes air, that is intimate and consuming, where only they exist and nothing else.

‘That is what I want,’ Bellefrey says to me. She’s drawing my round face. Squinting, holding up her thumb, making a show of it. ‘I want a man who makes me feel sublime.’ 

‘Don’t you mean loved?’ 

Oh no, she means sublime. She wants to be a thunderstorm. A tsunami. A hurricane. Something you stand in awe of. 

‘The word awesome is overused,’ she explains. ‘We use it too much. Everything is awesome. The food-stalls at the mid-summer carnival are awesome. The paintings by George Dier are awesome. The play at the Round was awesome. I’m awesome. You’re awesome. Everyone’s awesome. Awesome, awesome, awesome.’ Her voices becomes mocking at the end. 

‘But I am awesome,’ I protest. ‘I know how to make a penny appear from behind your ear.’ I sit up to perform the trick and she lets me fumble through it. 

That was over thirty years ago when Bellefrey was seventeen and me, a mere ten. 

Bellefrey wrote to me a week before she died saying that she hoped her daughter Lyra would make up her mind about the name for her daughter. The child was two weeks old and still no name. How was that to be countenanced? 

Lyra was Bellefrey’s third child, though second to survive. Perhaps she thought you should have all these things planned. Bellefrey was a great believer in organization. She planned out all the names for her children. Lists tracked down the side of commonplace books next to recipes and almanac predictions. Boy names, girl names, names that could go for either. 

As soon as she missed her third course she was to the local midwife to read leaves over her stomach so she could prepare properly. Will it be a boy? Will it be a girl? Will it die and so there is no need to prepare a name? 

Johan is her son, first born. He followed his father into the merchant trade and sells all manner of fabrics and spices. He visits me, aunty I’ve black tea pearls for you laced with lavender, hounded by dried ginger, protected by saffron. We brew fragrant drinks and he shows me his art. All those drawings of places I will never see but he has and oh isn’t that wonderful. 

Havel was her second child, a boy, but he died at three weeks. One of those deaths where the babe goes to sleep and doesn’t wake up. Gay in the morning, dead by dinner except there is no fever to blame this on. 

Lyra is three. First daughter and pulled out a screaming child with spindly legs and a too-large head. Her hair is the thick curls that is our mother’s inheritance, her grandmother’s inheritance. Married to a lawyer who aims to one day be well connected through the inns of court, she means to make herself into something. Daughter three was named Belle. She wagged a finger at me, never a word about beasts and fairy tales. 

I don’t tell her that a woman I knew said that fairytales are our collective neurosis born out in repeating tropes. Patterned to go down forever and on. 

The fourth had no name because the leaves read by her midwife told her not to bother. It was born early and without heartbeat. 

Guilluam is fifth and last. She swore he was conceived ready to escape her belly. He patted the inside of her stomach as soon as he could move. Once born he clung to her then didn’t anymore, running away at sixteen. A year before she died. 

What would her most difficult child make of all of this? I remember his sneering face. Where Johan was gentle kindness, Guilluam was sharp. He cut with a look. He cut with a laugh. He could be a harsh, cruel boy. Probably is a harsh, cruel man. 

Or maybe he’s softened. Maybe as he ages he’s gentling. Some people do that. But in all honesty, I don’t think Guilluam the sort. 

What am I trying to do? I’m trying to introduce a woman. A girl. A child. A person whom I have loved all my life and will continue to love all my life. Though I am so angry with her for leaving us it wasn’t her fault. 

See, I’m guilty as all of us are guilty. 

Bellefrey got caught up in something bigger than her death. She was hidden in the shadows of a great anger and a great brutality. 

Bellefrey died and was found months and months later wearing a green dress and purple shoes with pearls on them. 

No one knows what she was caught up in and no one knows about this great brutality, this great anger that once stalked through our less than fine and noble city. 

I do not have my sister’s blood on my hands. But I do have her gravedirt.

 --- 

 The Wellington one! I completely forgot about this one. It's part of the ridiculous Woodford Napoleon AU where Napoleon ends up in England and there are murder fairies. In this story, things are starting to come through a mysterious mirror that someone shipped to Napoleon for unknown reasons. Arthur shows up to investigate. 

 Another long excerpt:

In the drawing room rests the mirror. It was received a little over a month ago wrapped in brown paper with no information on sender or purpose. It is a heavy, old thing. Age-spotted, warped, the frame is heavy, gilded wood. Napoleon says that for him it’s Tuileries. Has he told Arthur about Tuileries? The sacking of it? 

‘Only that you said vive la revolution and someone asked if you were from the south and you said yes and that is what saved you.’ 

‘Southerners have to stick together,’ Napoleon’s sphinxian smile. Then he goes into himself, how he does when he’s formatting a memory — twisting it into some form of narrative that will make sense to those who were not there. Bertrand told Arthur once, It’s the revolution, we can’t really explain it. How we went about our day but also checked this list that was kept of everyone taken up as enemies. You went every morning to make sure your friends were still alive. Then you had breakfast. 

Napoleon shrugs at Arthur’s patient waiting. ‘It was messy. There was a man’s head on a pike. He had a beard, brown hair that curled, blue eyes. And the floor was scattered with torn drapes, rags that were once kingly gowns, shattered statues, remains of old portraits. A lot of broken glass. Windows and mirrors.’

And as for this mirror? With its growth that says: come come come. Nothing happened the first little while. Oh yes, various and sundry people of the neighbourhood came to view the mirror — to see if they recognised it.

‘And did they?’ Arthur asks. 

Yes and no for all who saw it. Mrs. Topsom said it reminded her of a beautiful manor in the Scottish highlands she once visited as a child. She did not seem comfortable with this recollection. Mrs. Phillips said it brought to mind a book she once read which told the story of a young woman trapped in a tower whose uncle froze time. Lady Preston said it was something from the Assembly Rooms in Bath. 

‘And your household?’ 

Napoleon shrugs. What is there to say on that? Nothing. It was the revolution and it was abdication and it was family homes that are no longer homes of families. 

Arthur shifts his gaze from the pensive face of Napoleon back to the mirror and he looks at it for a long moment. Studies the carvings of the frame — the flowers, vines, mischievous eyes peeking out from behind leaves. ‘I suppose it’s something from Spain, if I think on it long enough. A wealthy home we stayed in, during the campaign.’ 

‘A bit of something for everyone.’ 

‘Yes,’ Arthur agrees. Then he adds, ‘and no.’ 

The main issue with the mirror is this: that there is a staircase growing out of it. 

When Arthur approaches he can hear whispers crawling through his mind. Slithering down the back of his head.  

‘How long have the steps been here?’

‘Week and a half. It formed slowly, so we were able to document it in a thorough manner. Bertrand will give you his notes.’

Arthur hums as he inspects the object, pondering cause and effect. And, more importantly, who sent it to the exiles and to what purpose. There is nothing behind the mirror, only the wall it is propped up against. The stairs themselves are made of oak, and descend as three steps out into their world. Within the mirror they meld into an old stone walkway that climbs into a forest and is lost amongst trees and brush and forest fog. 

There are leaves on the floor. And dirt. Detritus of autumnal life. They crunch beneath Arthur’s boots. Everything smells of decay. 

‘Has anyone touched the mirror?’ Arthur asks. ‘Seen if it’s solid?’

‘We had Sir Hudson Lowe test it.’ Napoleon replies with an air of innocence. Arthur casts him a look. ‘What? Would you rather him disappear forever into the mirror or my good self? And no need to answer. You can save your blushes, we’re alone.’

‘You’re incorrigible.’

‘It’s one of my finer points.’

‘And? Was it solid?’ Arthur asks.

‘Yes and no.’ Napoleon approaches and touches the glass. His palm rests against it for a beat, then it begins to go through to the other side. Napoleon lets his hand sink through up to his wrist before withdrawing. ‘No one has walked through yet.’

With this touch the whispering decreases. Though, there remains the feeling of being watched. It is not that they are hunted, Arthur thinks, but rather they are being inspected. Something is curious about them. 

Reaching forward, he places his palm where Napoleon’s had been. The glass is cool to the touch and when his hand begins to sink through his skin buzzes with frisson of magic, that unfurling warmth crawls up his arm as his hand enters the other side where the air is cool yet humid. That sticky feeling of late winter.

He pulls his hand away.

‘What are your orders?’ Napoleon asks.

‘To investigate.’

The whispers return. Arthur rubs the back of his head. Such an unpleasant feeling, something else in your mind speaking a language you cannot understand in a collection of voices none of which are your own.

‘Maybe we should put a sheet over it,’ Arthur suggests after a moment. ‘Just in case.’

Going over to the window seat Napoleon opens a cupboard beneath to pull out a heavy blanket. He holds it up showing the shredded fabric. 

‘We tried,’ Napoleon says. ‘Mrs. Phillips recommended salt so we put a circle around it but found strange footprints in it the next morning. We tried the blanket, but it was clawed through. We collected iron implements and made a circle around it with those and that seemed to work better than the other options. I still think they got out, though.’

‘And you’re just keeping it here in your house?’

‘Oh yes, it’s fine.’

Arthur rolls his eyes. Trust Bonaparte to think it’s fine keeping a mirror-doorway to the land of fairy in his house with potential creatures coming and going out of it at all hours.

‘We leave food out for them.’

‘They’re not pets!’

‘No,’ Napoleon pats Arthur’s cheek with a warm smile. ‘But that’s what you’re supposed to do to keep fairies happy. Come now, you should know this. Milk, bread, sometimes a brandy.’

‘I give up!’

‘Young Napoleon Bertrand has suggested names for them —‘

‘Good lord.’

‘Ferdinand, Finnegan, and Felipe.’

‘Christ’s blood.’

‘Excellent,’ Napoleon enthuses. ‘You’re cursing like a Catholic. I knew I’d be a good influence on you. Come, we shall have a late supper.’

---

Thank you so much for the ask! <3 <3 

[das meme]

#ask #reply #writing #ask meme #napoleon #napoleon bonaparte #arthur wellesley #duke of wellington

[bellakitse]

Have you considered any Tarlos Au's yet? What if Owen took the job in Texas when TK was 18 so he went to college there and met Carlos and Iris. He and Carlos are BFFs who pine over each other for years, and when TK returns from visiting his mom in NY with a tongue ring, Carlos' life gets a lot harder (pun intended). Best friends to lovers ftw

Flashes of Silver

Carlos is fine with silently pining away for his best friend TK until the boy comes back to campus with a new accessory that makes Carlos’ brain melt with desire. 

nonnie, you should know that this request made me scream with delight, thank you for the idea!!

@shippingsailors

“Are you even listening to me right now, Reyes?”

Carlos Reyes looks up from his phone across the small table wherehe sits with Iris Blake, to find her giving him an unamused look as she muncheson her chips.

“You ask me to have lunch with you here in the courtyard, just soyou can ignore me and stare at you’re phone?” she questions, making him winceat her tone. “I could be in the library; I have papers due.”

“We all have papers due, chica,” he shoots back, even though he’sseconds away from being in the doghouse with his friend, he’s never been ableto keep from poking the bear. His family has always said that for such amellow, quiet kid, he’s always had a reckless streak. “Besides you needed toeat, and not in the library, you know Mrs. Powellhates that.”

Iris rolls her eyes at him, but there is a hint of a smile on herface. “Goodie-goodie, no wonder that old bat loves you so much.”

Carlos gives her an unconcerned shrug. It’s true, the university’slibrarian, a grumpy sixty-eight-year-old woman with grey-blue hair, loves him.“She just wants you to respect her books and the sacred space they are held in,is that so hard?”

Iris gives him another roll of her eyes, scoffing at his words asshe bites into her turkey club. “What’s TK saying?” she asks through a mouthfull, pointing at his phone.

“He’s got a surprise, said he’s joining us in a few – “ Carlostrails off, he looks up to see a smug smirk on her face, and Carlos goes redrealizing that he never actually said that he was texting with their friend TKStrand, Iris just figured it out. “How did you –“

Iris snorts loudly, drawing the attention of a few people aroundthem. “Your face, of course,” she starts, pointing a delicate finger in hisface as she waves it around in a circle. “You had ‘TK’ face; it’s verydistinctive. All soft and lovesick, kind of like when someone shows you a puppy,and all you want to do is snuggle it close and love it forever. TK is the puppyin this analogy.”

Carlos’ face is so hot; he’s sure he’s going to catch flame. “Shutup.”

Iris lets out a laugh at his words; her delight is unmistakable.“Great comeback, Reyes,” she says, still chuckling, though her expressionsoftens when he says nothing. She sighs as her laughter trails off. “Carlos,when exactly are you going to do something about the massive crush you have onour friend?”

Carlos feels his pulse spike at her question, his mouth going dry.“I don’t have a crush on TK.”

Iris raises an eyebrow at him; she looks both unimpressed andsympathetic all at once. “No, you’re right, it’s not a crush. It was a crush senioryear when he moved to Texas and flashed those pretty green eyes at you. Afterthree years of secretly pining, never dating for long, moping when he startsseeing someone and being overjoyed when it only lasts a month, I think we cancall it what it is, so…. When are you going to do something about being in lovewith your best friend?”

Carlos opens and closes his mouth, not sure what he wants to say,when they hear their names being called out. Looking across the yard, they seeTK waving at them with a wide smile on his face as he quickly walks towardsthem.

Carlos looks back at Iris panicked. “Please, don’t say anything,”he begs, feeling his hands sweat.

“I would never,” Iris says quickly, just as TK gets to theirtable. She flashes a smile up at the new arrival. “Hey, TK! How was New Yorkand your mom?”

“Crowded, dirty, and fun,” TK laughs as he leans down to hug her.“Mom was in top mom form,” he continues turning his smile towards Carlos.

Carlos gets up to hug him too, letting out an oomph when TKall but slams into him as he hugs him.

“I missed you too, needy,” he chuckles softly when TK doesn’t letgo of him right away. He catches the raised eyebrow Iris gives him and feelshimself blushing again, but he doesn’t loosen his hold on TK until the boy letshim go first.

“I just really missed that handsome Texan face of yours,” TKteases as he steps out of his hug, taking the empty chair at the table.

Carlos tells himself not to react to the comment. TK doesn’t meananything by it; he’s never meant anything by it. TK likes to flirt andtease; he’s a happy-go-lucky guy who knows he’s beautiful and likes to jokearound with everyone, especially his best friend. It means nothing.

“So,” Carlos clears his throat, hoping the smile on his face isrelaxed, and not an awkward mess the way he always feels when TK is around.“You said in your text you had a surprise?”

TK grins at him, his green eyes sparkling with mischief, and withoutsaying a word, he sticks his tongue out.

“Holy shit!” Iris exclaims in amazement, leaning forward to get abetter look. “That’s hot, TK!”

“Thanks,” TK smirks pleased, before looking over at Carlos. “Whatdo you think? Do you like it?”

Carlos hears the question, but he can’t answer. How can he whenhis brain is currently melting, and will at any second, ooze out of his ears.TK Strand has a tongue ring, a silver little round stud that was made with thesole purpose of ruining Carlos’ life.

“I – I, yeah, looks good,” Carlos croaks out.

Out of the corner of his eye, he can see Iris biting down on herlip, probably to keep from laughing at how pathetic he is.  Looking over at TK, he feels a pang of guiltas he sees the previously bright smile on his face has dimmed, and he looks atCarlos with an unsure expression. He wants to say something, anything to bringthat smile he loves so much back, but he feels tongue-tied and silly. Hisstupid feelings feel right on the surface, ready for everyone to see, and hejust wants to hide.

“I should go,” he says, standing up, ignoring the sound of protestTK and Iris let out. “Gotta study,” he gets out, gathering his things haphazardly.

“Carlos,” TK says his name quietly, looking up at him with a smallconfused frown, his eyes a little cloudy.

Carlos flashes him what he hopes is a smile and not a grimace. Heplaces his hand on TK’s shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze. “I’ll see youlater, okay?”

TK looks at him a moment longer before giving him a nod, though hedoesn’t lose his frown. “Okay.”

With one last awkward wave, he turns on his heel and hightails itout of there, away from the boy he’s stupidly in love with, and his damn tonguering.

֎֍֎

He hides out in the library like a coward. He gives Mrs. Powell awave, getting one back, and even gets half of a smile, which is the most anyonecan usually get from the older woman, before heading for the back to his usualtable.

The thing is he knows that hiding won’t help for long, not when itcomes to TK Strand. Where Carlos likes to be cautious, TK is bold. He stillremembers the boy when he first arrived in Austin, their senior year of highschool. It didn’t take long for it to get out around school that TK was gay,and it took even less time for people to try to mess with him for it. The boyhad a slimmer frame back then, dressed in tight skinny jeans, and had softpretty features. The guys they went to school with thought he was an easytarget, and TK quickly proved that line of thinking was incorrect. He wouldfight back like a hellcat, giving zero fucks about bloody knuckles as long ashis bullies were bleeding worse.

People learned not to mess with the boy quickly after that, andCarlos has been smitten ever since. Becoming his friend had given him thecourage to come out himself. After that, though at the time TK was almost ahead shorter than him, the boy had turned into Carlos’ own personal guard dog,glaring at anyone who even dared look at him wrong for being gay.

Between his sisters, the Blake girls and TK, Carlos never had toworry about anyone saying a single bad thing about his sexuality. No, TK neverbacks down from a fight, so really it’s no surprise when half an hour afterhe’s arrived at the library, nose deep into his forensic science textbook. Thechair across from him scrapes loudly against the wooden floor as it’s pulledout, and TK sits.

Carlos looks up at him, rolling his eyes as TK makes as much noiseas he can, taking out one of his books. “This is why Mrs. Powell hates you somuch; you’re so damn loud.”

“She hates me because she loves you, and she thinks I’m going tocorrupt you with my deviant ways,” TK flashes him a broad smile, and with it, Carlosgets a peek at a hint of silver.

Jesus fuck, that tongue ring is going to be the end ofhim.

“What she doesn’t get is that I have been trying to corrupt yousince the second I saw you, to no avail,” TK shakes his head sadly. “No matterhow much I try, no dice.”

Carlos rolls his eyes again at TK’s dramatics. “You act like I’msome saint, and you’re the devil here to lead me astray, calm down thetheatrics, Tyler,” he says, smirking when TK pouts at him at the use of hisname. It amuses Carlos to no end the way TK always reacts to it but yet nevertells Carlos to stop the way he does with others. Carlos tries not to give itmore importance than he does, it’s not a big deal that he’s one of the very fewpeople who knows and is allowed to call TK by his full name. It’s nothing.

They study quietly for a while, or well, TK studies,absently playing with the ring in his mouth while Carlos stares, his hand itchingto reach out for TK every time he sees the flashes of silver.

“Are you going to ask or just keep staring,” TK murmurs, his focusstill on his textbook even as Carlos spots the hint of a grin on his face.

Carlos clears his throat, feeling himself go pink at being caught,he’s had years of practice staring at TK, you would think he’d be better at it.

“Why?”

TK looks up from his book, he closes it and puts it to the sidebefore leaning in, elbows on the table as he smiles at Carlos, obviouslypleased that he caved. “Because I felt like it, and thought it would look good.”

Carlos nods; he can’t argue with the fact that it looks reallygood on TK, but then again, everything does. “Did it hurt?”

TK tilts his head to the side, thinking about it before wrinklinghis face. “Not as much as I thought it would. Afterward, it just felt weirdhaving something in my mouth.”

“Thought you’d be used to that,” Carlos mutters, smirking when TKlets out a dramatic gasp before he laughs, his green eyes dancing with amusement.

“I am curious about that,” TK comments, a mischievous glintentering his eyes. “I haven’t even kissed anyone since I got it, they say you’resupposed to wait three weeks at least.”

Carlos swallows hard as he does the math, TK’s been away for amonth. “When did you get it?”

TK looks at him as he leans back on his chair, a slow lazy smileon his face as he looks at Carlos knowingly. “The first week I got to NYC,” hesays softly, his eyes hooded as he stares at Carlos before he lets the littlesilver stud peek out again.

Carlos takes a sharp breath, his pulse spiking as he stares backat TK and reads the clear invitation on his best friend’s face. He’s not surewhat his face is saying to TK, probably all his love and the naked lust he’sfelt for him since he was seventeen, but whatever it is, it makes TK smile backat him bright and happy, his eyes dancing.

“Finally,” he breathes, never losing his smile. “I wasbeginning to think I was going to have to hire a skywriter.”

“You –,” Carlos licks his suddenly dry lips, feeling his stomachclench when TK’s eyes drop to his mouth, and he licks his own as he watchesCarlos.

“Since I met you,” TK admits softly, his face going gentle as helooks into Carlos’ eyes. “For such a smart guy, you’re so slow, baby.”

Carlos looks at him with wide eyes; he obviously has to bedreaming. His best friend in the whole world, the guy he’s been crazy about foryears now, can’t be telling him that he feels the same. There is no way he’s thatlucky.

TK’s expression softens even further, reminding him that TK canread him pretty easily. “I have to find a book,” TK starts, pointing towardsthe back of the library where no one ever really goes. Carlos watches him as hecomes around the table, holding his breath when TK runs his hand over the backof his neck, his fingers sending shivers down Carlos’ spine. “Maybe you canhelp me,” he says softly as he walks away, never once looking back to see ifCarlos is coming.

Taking a calming breath, it takes Carlos less than thirty secondsto make up his mind and stand from the table, following TK to the back. He’sfinally been given a chance to have the one thing he’s wanted forever. There’sno way he’s letting it slip through his fingers now.

He finds TK at the very end of the library, sitting on anotherreading table; this one a little dusty from lack of use. TK is biting on hisbottom lip in that nervous way of his, and when he looks at Carlos, gone is thecocky guy from a few minutes ago, and in his place is the not so confident boythat lies beneath his usual bravado. It’s the TK that always sparks Carlos’more protective instincts. He walks up slowly to him, stepping in between hisparted knees.  

With TK sitting, it puts them at a height difference that leavesTK looking up at him. Carlos brings his hands up to cradle TK’s face, tiltingit up even further, making sure TK is looking straight into his eyes.

“Are you sure you want this?” he can’t help but ask. The last thinghe wants is to lose his friend for a momentary case of hormones.

“Do you want this?” TK asks back; instead of answering, itcomes out more teasing, but Carlos can still see the hint of nerves.

“I have always wanted you,” Carlos confesses, finally letting itout. His heart beats hard against his chest as he gives life to his secret, butthe way TK’s eyes widen makes it worth it. “Every second of every day, I wantto be with you. I want to kiss you, hold you, have sex with you.”

“Carlos,” TK lets out breathlessly, his hands coming up to gripCarlos’ arms.

“But I want more than that too,” he continues, now that it’s outhe can’t hold back. “I have feelings for you. I’m in love with you, TK.”

TK tightens his hold on him, pulling him closer. “You never saidanything.”

“I was afraid to lose you,” Carlos whispers, now feeling unsure. “Irather have your friendship than not have you at all.”

TK closes his eyes, smiling as he shakes his head. “Idiot.”

“Hey,” Carlos starts to grin, moving forward when TK bringshis hands to the back of his neck and pulls him closer. Letting go of TK’s face,he places his hands on his waist, pressing his forehead against TK’s as the boylets out a soft laugh, and Carlos feels the same kind of giddy joy.

“I’ve had feelings for you since I met you,” TK says quietly, hisbreath touching Carlos’ face. He aches to close the distance between theirlips. “Back when I was so pissed that my dad dragged us here from New York, andI hated everything about Austin. You were the only thing I liked about it, andthen as we became friends, you became the person that made it feel like home.”

“Can I kiss you?” Carlos pleads, not being able to take it asecond longer, not when the boy he loves is telling him he feels the same way.

Carlos feels TK’s smile against his mouth instead of seeing it; hesighs into the kiss three years in the making. He pulls TK by the waist andgroans into the kiss when TK answers by wrapping his legs around Carlos’ waist,bringing their bodies flush against the other, and Carlos can feel how much TKwants him, his own body reacting to it the same way.

“Ty,” Carlos gasps out before TK slips his tongue inside his mouth.He moans helplessly not just at the taste of TK’s mouth, but also at the feelof that smooth silver stud pressing against his tongue as TK takes his time, makingsure he pulls Carlos apart with each flick of his skilled tongue.

“Carlos,” TK whispers back when he pulls away to take abreath. Carlos can’t stop touching or kissing him, and he trails a path withhis mouth from TK’s lips down his jaw, to his neck, kissing and sucking on anystrip of skin he can, instantly addicted to the taste of TK Strand.

“I knew it would be like this between us,” TK moans, his headthrown back as Carlos sucks at the pulse point under his jaw. His hand’s gripat his shirt and Carlos pulls back long enough to pull it over his head.

TK looks at him, his usually bright green eyes darkening as hetakes in Carlos’ bare chest, the piercing on his tongue peeking out as he curlshis tongue and makes an appreciative sound. “Fuck, baby, you’re a workof art.”

Carlos feels himself go hot at the compliment, and the heated wayTK looks at him, he feels it from the top of his head and down his chest.

TK makes another noise, smiling up at him wickedly as he sees hisskin turn pink. “Oh, that’s pretty,” he says softly, his hand reaching out totouch Carlos, his thumb rubbing gently over one of Carlos’ nipples. He shiversat the touch, not being able to stop the whine that escapes his lips. TK’s eyesflicker back up to his, and his smile softens. He uses his legs, still aroundCarlos’ waist to pull him back in.

Hands cup his face, and Carlos closes his eyes as TK brushes hislips across his. “We’re going to be amazing, aren’t we?” he asks against hismouth, and Carlos nods, swallowing hard as he pictures what being with TK isgoing to be like.

Yes, they’re going to be incredible, starting right now.

Carlos goes to kiss him again, more than ready to get theincredible parts started when someone clears their throat behind them, causinghim to freeze.

TK looks over his shoulder at their unexpected guest before helooks back at Carlos; his eyes are wide, but there is a twinkle of amusement inthem when he mouths ‘oops’ at him, like the little shit he is.

“Hi, Mrs. Powell,” he says brightly. Carlos closes his eyes withdread, something tells him after today he isn’t going to be the librarian’sfavorite anymore. “Carlos was helping me find a book.”

Carlos looks at TK incredulously, finding a bright smile on hislips as he looks back at him with zero shame, and shakes his head, but in theend, he can’t feel anything but happiness. This is the crazy boy he chose tolove.

֎֍֍

“I hear congratulations are in order,” Iris calls out as she walksup to them on the quad. Carlos looks up from where he’s been spending timekissing TK’s neck.

“Hey,” TK greets her back as he presses himself to his side, flashingCarlos a bright smile when he throws an arm over his shoulder and pulls himcloser. “Thanks, I honestly can’t believe we’re finally together and that ittook me sticking a metal rod through my tongue to get this going.”

“Hey, that’s not true,” Carlos protests as TK rolls his eyes.

“Don’t even try to deny it,” TK points at him. “I have beenthrowing hints forever and nothing. It took me getting a piercing, and honestly,me being tired of waiting for this to happen.”

“I didn’t know you were throwing hints!”

TK rolls his eyes again before leaning in to kiss him on the cheek.“I know,” he says gently. “It’s a good thing you’re pretty because you’re clueless.”

Carlos goes to protest again, but TK stops him by giving himanother kiss, this time on the lips. Carlos sighs into it, ready to get lost init when Iris clears her throat loudly.

“Yeah, still here,” she says sarcastically, giving him an eye rollof her own. “I knew you’d be annoyingly cute once you finally got your shittogether.”

Carlos blushes at the comment, while TK laughs delightfully.

Iris smirks back at them. “By the way, that’s not what I wascongratulating you two on.”

“Oh?” TK raises an eyebrow at her, and Carlos feels dread again asher smirk seems to grow.

She pulls a flyer out of her bag, passing it over to them, andCarlos feels his face turn bright red as he takes in both his and TK’s faces onthe sheet of paper, with the words ‘banned from the library until further notice’under their faces.

“Apparently even though she hates everyone, it takes a lot to getMrs. Powell to ban someone; you two are now legends,” Iris tells them with agrin, wagging her eyebrows at him.

“Oh my god,” Carlos groans, dropping his head into his hands. Heturns his head to the side when he hears a snicker and finds TK smiling wildly.

“You find this funny, Tyler?” he questions dryly, and though TKmakes his usual face at his name, it doesn’t diminish the smile on his face, orthe affection shining in his eyes.

“Hilarious,” TK grins.

Carlos shakes his head, unable to stop his own smile. “Why do I likeyou?”

“Love,” TK corrects, biting down on his own smile. “Yousaid you love me, you can’t take it back now.”

Carlos smiles gently at him, bringing his hand back up to cup hischeek. “I’m never going to take it back.”

TK starts leaning in to kiss him, when Iris groans, forcing themto stop.

“Once again,” she shakes her head at them. “I’m still here.”

Carlos flashes her an apologetic look, knowing it doesn’t come offas sincere when he can’t stop smiling; he’s just so happy.

“Whatever,” she rolls her eyes as she stands back up. “I’mleaving to let you two be gooey and in love, try not to get banned from all ofcampus for indecent exposure.”

They watch her leave before TK draws his attention by tugging onhis hand.

“She’s got a point you know,” TK starts, giving him a dirty smirk.“If I don’t get you alone soon, I’m going to jump you right here.”

Carlos smiles back, his stomach clenching with anticipation. “Luckyfor us, I have an apartment, and I live alone.”

TK curls his tongue, and that little silver stud meant to driveCarlos crazy peeks out. “Then what are we waiting for?”

#911 lone star #tarlos #tarlos fic #911 lone star fic #tk x carlos #my writing #anon #Anonymous #college au

[emy-loves-you]

Useless Gays: The Prequel Chapter 2

Thick as Thieves

Chapter 1 | Masterlist | Chapter 3

So this chapter is divided into 3 flashbacks: The first one has Roman at 5 years old, 10 in the second one, and somewhere between 20 and 24 in the third one (after high school, before WNaUG). For those of you who are reading this and not WNaUG (which makes no sense but okay), Rebecca/ReeRee is Remus' deadname. Remus and Roman are fraternal twins, with Remus being slightly older. Remus will be using the name Rebecca and she/her pronouns because: 1.) Remus didn't realize that he was a boy until he was 13, so he wouldn't use male pronouns yet. 2.) This chapter is all in Roman's POV. Roman never knew that Remus transitioned, since he ran away before telling Roman. So, until someone tells him, Roman will always use she/her pronouns when describing ReeRee.

“Come on, Ro! It’s not that high!” She laughed, striking a dramatic pose.

“Yes, it is!” 8-year-old Roman yelled, balling his hands up at his sides. She knew he was afraid of heights! Roman started crying, and he glared at the bottom of the tree. He was such a crybaby. Why couldn’t he be brave like her?

She stopped laughing. Roman looked up and saw her smiling softly at him, no longer teasing. “(Sigh) Here, give me your hand. We’ll go up together.” She crouched on the tree branch, using one hand to steady herself and lowered the other one towards Roman.

Roman frowned, eyeing the hand in suspicion. “You’re not gonna drop me, right?”

She raised her arm to place over her heart. “I swear as your big sister-”

“By six minutes!”

“I won’t drop you. Or pretend to drop you. Or shake the branch. Or drop down and leave you up here-”

“Okay, I get it!” Roman yelled, stomping his foot.

She smiled again, the type of smile that Roman wishes he saw more often. It was the smile that said I love you. You mean the world to me. I will always protect you. “I would never use your fear for my own amusement. You know that, Ro. And if you fall, I’ll catch you. I promise.” She extended her hand again. “Now get your butt up here! I have somethin’ to show ya!”

Roman grabbed her hand, and there was a scary woosh before he was in the tree. He buried his head in her hair, so scared. We’re so high up and we’re gonna fall fall fall fall fa-

“Shh,” her hand rubbed against his back, grounding him. “We’re fine, we’re safe, nothin’s gonna happen I swear.” They sat like that for a few minutes, Romans sobs slowly turning into sniffles. She slowly pulled away, using her hands to keep Roman steady. “Better?” He nodded. “Good. Now look.” She pointed somewhere off to his left. He forced himself to look away from her face, his fears resurfacing. He took a deep breath before turning towards his left.

“Woah.” There, on the neighboring branch, was a bird’s nest. There were two eggs, and Roman watched as cracks slowly formed along the eggs. The two birds were nearly identical, with the bird on the right hatching seconds before its sibling. “They’re so pretty.”

“That’s us.” She relaxed on the branch, her back leaning up against the tree. “Birds of a feather flock together. And we’ll stay together, even when our wings are plucked and our dreams are shattered. Twins forever, right?”

He opened his mouth to respond. “Righ-”

“WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING?!” Roman shrieked in fright, suddenly losing his grip on the branch. He screamed as he started to fall.

“Ro!” Suddenly, arms were wrapped around him, and he landed on top of her. “Ah! God that hurt! Are you okay Ro!”

Ro nodded. “Yeah, I’m okay.” He got up and gasped. “Your arm!” Her arm was twisted from where it was crushed underneath him.

She went to move it and hissed in pain. “I think it’s broken.” She smiled, but Roman could see tears in her eyes. “At least I caught you! I told you that you’d be fine!” Before Roman could respond, his mother marched up to them. Momma immediately began to scold them, only noticing her broken arm when she went to grab her and she screamed in pain.

Roman was told to clean his room while they went to the doctor. When they returned, she had a lime green cast on her arm. Momma took away their favorite toys (her dolls and Roman’s foam sword) before telling them to clean up the kitchen. Roman grabbed a red sharpie, signing his name on her cast. She smirked. “Your ‘m’ looks like a ‘v.’”

“Does not!”

“Does too!”

“Does not!”

“Does too!”

“Does too!”

“Does not!” She realized what had happened an laughed. “Good one, Ro.” She used her good hand to ruffle his hair. Her special smile was back, the one that she only gave him.

He giggled, leaning into her touch. “Thanks, ReeRee!”

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Boom!

Roman shrieked, pulling his blanket over his head. He could hear the heavy rain against his window. He loved rain (he stomped in puddles while she made mud pies) but he hated thunder. It was so loud and he could never tell when it would-

Boom!

He shrieked again. He flushed in embarrassment. He was 10, for God’s sake! He shouldn’t be afraid of something as silly as thunder! His sister had gotten over these stupid fears years ago! His mind wandered to his sister. Can I?

He shook his head. It’s really late at night, she’s probably sleeping. When they were younger, Roman would go stay in her room during thunderstorms (he’d tried going to his parents room once, but they yelled at him and sent him back to his room). But that was when they were younger. They were 10 now, and she kicked him out last time he went into her room uninvited.

Boom!

Roman jumped, falling off of his bed. That’s it! He quickly grabbed his Dragon Witch (a stuffed animal that Uncle Terrence gave him for his 7th birthday) and ran out of his room. He made his way down the hall until he reached the pink door. Roman scrunched up his nose. His sister hated pink. She had asked their father if they could repaint her door green, and he yelled at her. He opened the door, stepping into her room. Since their parents never went into their rooms anymore, she had redecorated it. The pink walls were covered in drawings of green tentacles. The floor was filthy, with dirty clothes and torn drawings strewn about. Roman was surprised to see his sister awake, sketching a new tentacle drawing. “Thought you might show up.” She said, setting down her sketchpad. She patted part of the bed next to her. “Come on, I don’t bite.”

Roman hurried over, diving under the blankets. He shrieked as another clap of thunder hit. He felt a hand in his hair and tensed. The hand paused for a moment, before slowly rubbing Roman’s scalp. He relaxed, leaning into the touch. He always loved his sister, but he loved this version of her the most. When she realized that he was actually scared, not startled or mildly uncomfortable. She wouldn’t tease him or ask unnecessary questions. Sometimes she would twist together a tale from nothing, concocting a story of pain and hardship, of love and trust. Other times she wouldn’t speak, offering silent comfort and protection against the world around them. He sighed, finally drifting off to dreamless slumber. The last thing he knew before darkness took him was the press of her lips to his forehead as he drifted off. “Goodnight, Ro.”

Goodnight, Ree...

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Ro, you gotta wake up!”

Roman woke up with a gasp, his chest heavy. He forced himself to breathe, shaking like a leaf. He felt a hand in his hair, and he immediately lunged, burying his face in her shoulder. He sobbed, listening to the gentle shushing sounds as he was rocked back and forth. He felt a second hand on his back, and he started babbling. “ReeRee, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I should’ve listened to you. I should’ve trusted you.”

“Oh, sweety.” Roman jerked up. Patton stared back, tears running down his cheeks. He felt the hand on his back retreat, and he grabbed it, bringing Logan closer. Patton’s hand pressed against his cheek, and Roman suddenly realized that he was crying.

“’m sorry.” He muttered, wiping his eyes.

“It’s okay, sweety.” Patton assured him, pulling Roman into a side hug. He felt Logan do the same on his left. “Do you wanna talk about it?” Roman shook his head, still feeling slightly despondent. “Okay. Do you wanna stay up and cuddle?” Roman nodded, sighing when he felt Patton’s fingers in his hair. In less than an hour, they would all drift back into a dreamless sleep. A few hours from now, they would each go to work, a cheerful facade in place. But for now, they stayed there, silent tears streaking down their faces. For Patton and Logan, it was for the pain their lover was going through. For Roman, it was for the sister that he had pushed away,

You said you would always be there to catch me, ReeRee. But I pushed you away. Now I’m so scared that I’ll fall again. What am I going to do without you there to catch me?

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Taglist: @bisexualdisaster106 @self-taught-mess @itawalrus @arodynamic-enby @sanderssides-angst @whatishappeningrightnow @idont-freaking-know @cute-and-angsty-princess @artsy-enby09 @girl-who-reads @drarrymalecsolangelo @count-woe-laf @im-an-anxious-wreck @ent-is-undecisive

#useless gays #sanders sides fic #roman sanders #remus sanders #logan sanders #patton sanders

[hogwartsambientfeverdream]

The story of a flower

H used to hate her freckles. Tiny little specks of colour splattered all over her face an her body. They always reminded her of how much she looks like her dad and not her mom. Her mother have them too, but not like her father. People would call her by her dad’s name when younger for fun, to point out how much they look like each other and how cute this is... She never really blamed or disliked him for that, she just really wanted to look like a different person.

It wasn’t the resemblance that bothered her though... She loves her dad. Besides, calling the kids by their parents names when younger to insinuate how much they look like them was quite frequent in her big family. Both her older cousins had the same fate with their father; But why did it botherd her so much? 

Her family is huge. She especially loved the summers because everyone would gather at their grandparents’ for at least 2 weeks. She loved it! Lots of cousins running around playing and screaming. Sure, they were not allowed to use magic but they would secretly hide from the parents and try out some stuff. The older ones would always show them new tricks and especially after starting to join Hogwarts. One time their grandfather caught them and he laughed proudly. She remembers that he started shedding some tears but no one else remembers that... But she could swear she saw it... 

She especially loved her older cousin. She loved him maybe as much as her sister. She was his protégée. He would always share secrets with her under the bedsheets long past bed time. He would always tell her the new spells he learned at school and would give her advice for when her time would come. He was the first one to talk to about the houses in Hogwarts. After her sister was sorted in Ravenclaw and her other cousin in Slytherin, she started fearing that she would not be sorted in Gryffindor either. Everyone anticipated for the kids to be sorted in Gryffindor, since there was a huge tradition with Gryffindor in their family. But everything changed with them. And then she started fearing about not sleeping next to her family at night. That Cristmas holiday, she told her cousin about it and that she had it for granted that she would sleep closely to him or her sister so that they could protect her if she had any bad dreams. He laughed in the most sweet way possible and hugged her.

“I’m pretty sure you will be sorted in Gryffindor don’t worry...”, he said

“But how do you know? We said the same for everyone else and now what?”, 10year old H answered.

“The thing is though, that after entering Hogwarts and understanding how things work, I personally never anticipated for them to be sorted in Gryffindor.. I was sad that I would not play Quidditch in the same team as my brother, sure, but he does indeed belong to Slytherin. And the same goes for your sister.. She does indeed belong to Ravenclaw... Even your mom did, i think, but that’s another story. But you are different that them.. You are truly brave.. You haven’t realised it yet but you are...”

She felt better at that time and she slept very well... For once she didn’t have any nightmares that night. But then she started thinking about it... But why? Why was she brave? And how can you tell from an 10 year old kid that they are brave...

The summer before entering Hogwarts she realised what her cousin was talking about. It all came together. Being annoyed by the resemblance to her dad, relatives calling her by his name, the nightmares... And then for the first time, she expressed to her mom something that never made sense to her.

It was around June. Her sister and cousins had not yet come back from Hogwarts. It was Saturday. She remembers because her mom wasn’t at work. She was home cooking, while she was there at the kitchen with her drawing. Her dad was not there... She doesn’t remember why.. Maybe something to do with his job... The sun was very bright and their home was full of light. She, as always, was drawing her mother’s colourful plants.

“Mom, why am I not named after a flower?”, she asked while finishing the small lavenders at her drawing paper.

“What do you mean, sweetheart?”, her mother turned to her quite confused..

“Well, you know... Both Lily and Rose are named after flowers, right? Why not me?”

“Because, you are a bo...”, Hermione stopped her phrase almost scared. But not scared of what H meant, but scared that she would harm her own child... “What do you mean by that, love? James and Albus are not named after flowers...”, she said smiling while she approached her and holded her little hands gently.

“Well, yes I know that... But, I am not like them... I am like Lilly and Rose... I am like my sister, right?”, H answered.

Hermione looked at her child with all the love she has ever felt for anyone and smiled at her.

“Yes love, your are like them”, she said and hugged her.

That night H couldn’t sleep. She got up and left her room. At first she went to Rose’s room and laid down on her bed. She often did this when Rose was away at Hogwarts. Her room calmed her. It was like she was there hugging her and reassuring her that the nightmare was only a bad dream and nothing else. But even then she couldn’t sleep. 

She got up again and decided to go to her parents’ room to sleep with them like how she would snuggle in between them when she was a little kid. As she was approaching the room she saw the light turned on and she heard someone crying soflty. When she finally approached the half opened door she saw her mother crying and her dad holding her compassionately.

“It’s ok, we love her and she knows that! Everything will be fine! As long as she has us by her side everything will be fine!”, her dad said

“No, it’s not that easy... You don’t understand! The Wizarding World is sooo closed minded and ignorant! I had to fight for elves rights only recently in the ministry! We had to fight for blood purity only 20years ago Ron! You know I love our world but muggles are far ahead in those things! James and his friends were ridiculed when they joined Wizarding Pride in Hogsmeade! And even that only happened 5 years ago! And let’s not start thinking about the absence of laws relevant to these matters! They will make her life a living hell!”, Hermione said in pure agony still not able to hold her tears...

Ron was looking at her troubled, realizing how true everything that Hermione said was true. Memories of his, words, jokes, weird looks... Everything... The wizarding world was extremely ignorant in those matters... Even he was, before spending time traveling in the muggle world with Hermione. She was right... Things were getting a little better and that’s all thanks to new muggle-born kids entering the community, but still... Maybe for gay people sure, but not for trans... And especially not for trans kids like H. 

“What are we going to do?”, he said with a sad face while his eyes were beginning to tear up.

“I trust no one here.. Believe it or not... I am going to London first thing on Monday... I’ll start making calls tomorrow morning in case we know any specialist in London already familliar with our world... If not, then I don’t care even if I am arrested for accidentally revealing myself... Right now we have no time searching if anything like that is possible the magical way... I don’t trust it... I am going back to where I am more familiar with...”, she answerded, and for the first time H saw an unfamiliar determination in her mother’s eyes... Her mother was always driven and vigorous in what she wanted to do, but this time was different. "And it's not just that... We also need to find a way even for us.. For the whole family. We need to talk to your parents, your siblings... Everyone.. This is not going to be easy you know...", she continued.

“I know. I think Rose is already there... Long before H talked... The same goes for James, too. I think the bigger part will be my parents. They will need some time but I think they will understand and accept the situation.”, Ron said and looked at Hermione with love and realisation. “But either way, we will make it! We will make it together, as we always did! And as for the laws you mentioned, that means we have a new fight ahead of us! But we will make it! Things will change no matter what! There are already people out there talking about these matters. Ideas are already been pushed forward... We will help to make the change happen!”, her dad answered equally determined.

She want back to her sister’s bed feeling sad but happy at the same time... Sad because she couldn’t understand what the problem was and because she saw for the first time her mother crying and even almost her dad; but still happy, because she felt more loved than any other day, even though they didn’t tell her anything, they didn’t even realise that she was listening to them. She laid down under her floral sheets and looked outside the window. Hugging her purple teddy bear, she peacefully fall asleep while gazzing at all the hortensias, roses and azaleas on the ledge. 

The next few days were busy. Her parents were all over the place and they often called her grandparents to take care of her while away for business. At first they acted a liitle strange for some reason she could not understand... Although she was finally happy to hear them call her H and not by her birth name. After around 10 days or maybe 2 weeks, her mom told her that they would go to London together.

And so they did. She always loved going to the muggle world. Grandpa always talked about how fascinating muggles are, her mom was muggle born and even uncle Harry used to live there when he was younger. Her, James and Lily would have the best time exploring the muggle world.

She was so excited! Her mom said that they would visit a friend of her’s and have a picnic outside in the sun. She wore her favorite pink curduroy trousers which Rose gave her and her favorite little backpack, on which she had embroidered litlle lavenders with her grandma. 

The day was amazing and it passed without her realizing it. They had rasberry juice and fruit salad. They discussed a lot of fascinating things and she really liked her mother’s friend. He was a doctor and he was very sweet and funny. He even gave her a little bracelet which he made with seashells that he had gathered from his travels around the mediterranean. 

On the way home her mom picked some pretty flowers for her.

“Did you have a good time today?”

“Yeah! It was really nice actually! And your friend was really funny! I really liked him!”, H answered with a calm smile on her face.

“That’s really great to hear, you know. We will be seeing him in the future for quite some time, if that’s ok with you”, Hermione smiled back relieved that she made a good choice. Luna is always trustworthy in those matters.

“So, about the conversation we had earlier... Does that mean I can have a flower name too?”, H turned to her mother full of anticipation.

“Of course! This is the first thing we will take care of!”, Hermione answered happily. “You can pick any name you like, sweetheart! At any time. No rush.”, she said as she caressed her little hand lovingly.

The following September she boarded the Hogwarts Express holding hands with James and Rose. They sat side by side in the cabin with the rest of her cousins and she didn’t even realise when they had arrived. This was the first day that she met so many new people, which she loved because she got to introduce herself with her beautiful flower name. 

And then, it was time for the sorting ceremony. She was quite afraid, but then she remembered what James told her last year. Besides, Weasleys nowadays were sorted all over, not ony Gryffindor, which meant that even if she was not sorted where she wanted, she would at least be with family. 

“Hortensia Granger-Weasley”, the professor announced and she immediately rushed to the stool while looking at Rose, who was looking at her nearly crying of how proud she was of her little sister.

“Hah! We have the younger Granger-Weasley! Hmmm!!! The decision is quite clear, yees! I think GRYFFINDOR will learn so much from you and your bravery!”, the hat yelled and she ran straight to James’ open arms.

Years later and she eventually came to terms with her freckles. Nowadays she loves the fact that she looks like her dad, whom she objectively finds quite handsome. Nowadays she knows why she hated the freckles in the first place, and the resemblance, and the fact that everyone called her “Little Ron”.

Thanks to her parents and the new found community of people like her, which in a way started considering a second family, though, she can be the girl she is. It wasn’t without struggles, however. It took her parents’ and uncle’s power fuelled by a huge wave of protests of queer wizarding people to pass new bills. And she was lucky that her family is so influential. During the time that her mother was raging in the ministry trying to find files that she could use, she found a lot! Suggestions for equality bills, for gender recognition laws, for abolition of gender dormitories in Hogwarts, complaints of mistreatment of younger queer wizards, accusations of violence and other similar records. Nothing had passed. The wizarding community in the U.K was so conservative in those issues that had even caused individuals or even whole wizarding families to move somewhere else, more friendly and accepting of their loved ones. Even gay people of power (most of them closeted) kept their mouth shut publically so that they would not lose their influence. And that was sad to say the least, her parents thought, especially considering the impact their voice could have in the wizarding community. 

The wizarding world was finally changing, but not without important losses. It took so many years but queer wizarding people could finally start to breath more freely. The fight was not over, but at least they had hope. And hope gave them strength to keep on fighting!

P.S.: The idea for a trans character in my fanfiction pieces was formed when J.K.Rowling first retweeted some problematic stuff, back in December. I wanted to right it back then, but hey.. laziness... hehe... I always wanted to implement more queer characters (Adrianne is one) but I never had clear ideas of who and how. 

If you think that what i did is offensive to the source material, truly, i don’t care. If you did not like it just leave. This is not the fanfic for you. I am not here to debate trans issues with people who don’t get it. All I want is to celebrate LGBTQIA+ people, and i will be happy to discuss with queer people who have thoughts. 🦋💖

As for the whole J.K.Rowling recent story, i have this to say. The wizarding world does not belong to J.K.Rowling anymore! It belongs to everyone! The Harry Potter universe is so alive because of the fans and no one else! The fans preserve the spark with their art and fanfiction! And this is evident, since no one listens to what Rowling says anymore about the lore! The wizarding world was made quite conservative due to its author but the acceptance, inclusivity and change comes from the fans. We are the ones who wrote fanfics about gay couples and characters of colour, we are the ones that imagined ourselves in the story, not J.K. . Wizarding World is not Rowling’s anymore, it’s ours! So no matter what she says and what she believes we will continue to do what we do best! Expand the boundaries of the consrvative world she had once created and make it fully our own. 

Happy Pride Month everyone

Love 💖🧡💛💚💙💜

#Harry Potter #harry potter fanfiction #Harry Potter art #wizarding world #hogwarts #Gryffindor #ron weasley #hermione granger #granger weasley #hand drawn #hand drawings #story #fanfic #fanfiction stories #Fanart #trans pride #pride month #lgbtq #trans lives matter #happy pride 🌈 #pride #lgbtqia #queer pride #j.k. rowling #queer harry potter

[they-call-me-the-fomfather]

Quarantine Fic Rec

So I decided to do a Sterek fic rec of some of my favs because it’s quarantine and I’ve literally re-read these sooooo many times.

Please heed the warnings! I am an adult and thus read E, if that’s not for you, no worries, there’s other fic on here and out there! DO NOT READ E if you shouldn’t or don’t want to. Let’s all be cool consenting adults, yeah?

Leave a comment on AO3 if you like any of them!

Fly a Little Faster by mirrorkill (32,052 | 1/1 | T)

Everyone knows when you go back in time, you shouldn't step on an ant, just in case you accidentally kill your own grandparent or something. But what happens when you go back in time and, uh, accidentally interrupt the one event that apparently made the Grumpiest Alpha in Town into a ball of mindless manpain?

Well, if Marty McFly can do it, so can Stiles Stilinski. All he has to do is get Derek and Paige to fall in love before he gets pulled back to his own time. And before he makes anything worse. That's easy as pie, right? Right?

Now as Ever (All That Is and Has Been) by venis_envy (52,270 | 16/16 |  E)

Stiles can't remember what happened to rearrange the time-space continuum, or how he ended up being pulled into the past. All he knows is that he's there now, in 2003 Beacon Hills, with a teenage werewolf and a possibly-crazy veterinarian as his only allies.

Play It Again by metisket (63,206 | 3/3 | T)

In which Stiles goes along with one of Derek’s plans and ends up in an alternate universe as a result. He should’ve known better. He did know better, actually, and that means he has no one to blame but himself.

“Laura wants to lure the kid in with food and kindness and make a pet of him, like a feral cat. Derek wants to have him arrested for stalking. They’re at an impasse. (And the rest of the family is staying emphatically out of it in a way that suggests bets have been placed.)”

Misfire by mothlights, unpossible (28,804 | 6/6 | T)

“The debt must be repaid,” she says, and it has the weight of a vow. The words resonate through him, ringing through his ribcage and the bones of his jaw, and Stiles loses his breath and maybe his grip on reality because she draws herself upright and where there had once stood a supermodel-level MILF now there is Galadriel’s much hotter older sister, a Presence of unmistakable power in their ordinary, smells-vaguely-of-Thai-takeout hallway.

“Oh shit,” Stiles says.

Help Wanted (But Not Really) by reillyblack (26,097 | 9/9 | M)

"Stiles, I'll clear up your confusion about the position. Derek here needs someone to live with him. He's a difficult person to live with, so I won't sugarcoat that. But his responsibilities at the company right now make it impossible for him to actually take care of himself and his home. That would be your job," Laura explained.

Both Stiles and Derek objected at the same time.

Wolves in the Timber by adeepeningdig (17,217 | 3/3 | T)

Stiles had always thought that Derek would understand, maybe. If Derek had been around to talk about it. He would know what it was like to think that maybe it wasn’t a fluke, maybe there’s something in you, something twisted that pulls blood and betrayal and death to you, like a remnant of your mother’s disease, her monstrous confusion, still encoded in your genes. Stiles still dreams of that day in the loft, the water lapping at his ankles and the dirty light. Derek’s stricken face. He wonders if there are days when Derek wants to tear his own hands off too. But Derek wasn’t around, and now he’s a wolf. So.

He’s 28 years old, it’s been years. He’s past all that. He should be past all that.

There’s a black wolf panting on the floor of his apartment like an accusation. Stiles knows that there’s nothing that Lydia can say or do. He’s not projecting, it’s the truth, it’s the kinship he’s always felt with Derek, and if he could curl into his animal self, he would, and maybe he would stay there. It would be easier that way.

Good News, Bad News, Very Good News by clotpolesonly (2,088 | 1/1 | G)

Bad news: Keys locked inside. Good news: Experienced lockpick Stiles Stilinski, at your service. Worse news: Boss-man might think he was a juvenile delinquent. Better news: Cute deputy totally saw him being badass. Worst news: Deputy already knows he's a total loser, it is Too Late. Best news: Deputy doesn't seem to mind.

Constantly on the Cusp by alisvolatpropiis (40,884 | 13/13 | E)

Stiles is gay, out and proud, and a Beacon Hills deputy. Derek is a firefighter and war veteran who thinks he's straight; or, Derek and Stiles have lots of semi-public hatesex on the road to Love.

A Knight in Shining Flannel by elpie (horribibble) (3,650 | 1/1 | T)

When a frantic phone call from his daughter sends him speeding across town, Derek Hale is prepared for the worst.

What he finds instead are the Stilinskis.

-

An AU featuring tiny werewolves, awkward single dads, and one bad babysitter.

Strut on a Line, its Discord and Rhyme by xiaq (61,811 | 21/21 | T)

“Carry me,” Stiles says.

“No.”

“But I’m injured.”

“You have a rash,” Derek says. “On your arm. Your feet work just fine.”

“Please?”

“No. You weigh almost as much as I do. And you ate a pound of chicken at lunch.”

"Well, yeah, but I pooped like an hour ago, so.”

“You’re disgusting.”

“Don’t play, you love me.”

I do, Derek thinks, relatively horrified. I really do.

Wolf in the House by joelawson (33,481 | 1/1 | T)

“What? It’s totally an improvement. He’s not scowling, or dating bad guys, or slinking around in unsanitary places. Still a bit paranoid, but what can you do. At least he’s a lot easier to get along with when you can buy his affections with ear rubs.”

“And you always wanted a dog,” Sheriff added wryly.

“And I always wanted a dog.”

Suspicious Minds by hellhole (sweetfanfics) (40,105 | 1/1 | E)

“Don’t feed Balto your pizza,” Stiles mildly warns his daughter.

“Derek.”

Stiles pauses, mouth open and cheese sliding off the pizza as he parrots, “Derek? Who’s Derek?”

His daughter rolls her eyes, like Stiles has just asked her the dumbest question ever. “The wolf, Daddy!”

“You changed his name?” Stiles asks in surprise. Usually she’s pretty set about naming things. Her doll’s name was decided two seconds after receiving it, the car has been Alonzo for three years now, and the toaster ‘Pop’ for the last six months.

Meg nods, prodding the sliding cheese back on top of her slice. “Yeah. He told me his name is Derek. And that he doesn’t really like Balto.”

“Is that right?” he asks, eyeing the wolf who seems far too interested in watching a pair of animated moose arguing. It’s official. This wolf is weird. This whole situation is weird.

-- Separated from Laura after being cornered by some hunters, an injured Derek finds himself being rescued by Stiles and his young daughter. In more than one way.

Our Lives are Changing Lanes by grimm (47, 537 | 1/1 | E)

There's a lot of screaming going on inside the first house Stiles visits. He isn't really worried, because it sounds like kids, but then the door opens and hi, says his dick, because the dude in front of him is gorgeous, built like a god with a face like thunder. Stiles wants to lick that solid jaw line. Hold the fuck on, says his cop brain, because the dude's got kids hanging all over him; one's on his back, skinny legs looped around his waist, and another two hanging off one arm, toes barely brushing the ground. There's a tubby toddler clinging to his leg like a koala, and he's got a baby tucked into the crook of the one arm that doesn’t have kids hanging off it. Stiles' mouth drops open.

"How many of those kids did you kidnap?" he asks before he can wrangle his brain into submission.

The man gives him a look that says what the fuck is wrong with you and snaps, "You think I'd subject myself to this on purpose?"

"Oooh," says one of the kids hanging off his arm. "I'm telling Mom."

There’s hella more where these came from, I’ve literally got a list of over 3,000 fic I’ve read, so if anyone likes, I can do another!

Stay safe but don’t stay bored,

Fomfather

#sterek #fic rec #wolf!derek #deputy!stiles #time travel #teen wolf #Derek Hale/stiles stilinski #alive hale family #feral derek

[eyeslikefoxglove]

Episode 5 - WangXian flirts & The fucking lake does fucking what?

Welcome to episode 5 commentary. I should very much be packing my flat but I am a fucking mess so... also, my cat seems intent on blocking my hands from writing.

LWJ don’t give a fuck about “strange noises” lol.

Hhhhggghhhhhhh is the Library scenes. Wangxian/WuJi is playing and I’m living (we are barely three minutes in, brace yourselves).

Anyone who can do Chinese calligraphy and with a brush has my forever admiration. Holy shit it looks like the most nerve wracking time, I write with a quill (fountain pen? Ink pen? Idk google translate says all three fit) and I already favour thin tips so my handwriting is crisp and legible, I can’t imagine writing with something that’s flexible with pressure.

Btw, my fan girl ass got herself a black bamboo quill as a graduation/Christmas present because I could not pass the opportunity of having my very own ChenQing in a manner of speaking. Sorry, back to the commentary.

Bitch don’t scream in the library.

He doesn’t hate you, he wants to kiss you stupid but *vaguely gestures at the fact that LWJ is a whole ass repressed gay teen mess* that.

(Again, what the fuck, calligraphy brushes lol nope)

“May I have the honour of getting a glimpse of you?” Hooooooly shit, so that was smoother than I expected.

IT’S BEST BOI WN!

I understand not bothering to translate things like “Shijie” because “senior martial sister” sounds hella weird. But doesn’t jie/Jiejie mean big sister? WN calling WQ sister or big sister is not weird.

Wait, not only is their love song playing, he’s also sneaking looks al LWJ so he can draw him accurately and grinning like a fool.

This charming idiot.

“Extremely boring” yeeeeees sassy LWJ come forth.

I honestly did not see him switch the books and I’ve replayed that bit time and time again.

“Don’t tell me you’ve never read a book like this.” WWX, darling gremlin, you’re talking about Lan “Whole Ass Repressed Gay Teen” WangJi.

But LWJ looks like he’s going to rip his throat out with his teeth.

WWX is so upset his gay porn got shredded (and this sounds dirtier than i meant it to)

Speaking of dirty, I know that that special book chapter exists, but I also know it’s uncomfortable for a bunch of people (myself included) so I won’t mention it past this point. But when I say anything about LWJ wanting to tackle WWX onto the nearest flat surface and do him, I mean in a very enthusiastically consensual way.

All this to say, LWJ’s crush just showed him a gay porn book and LWJ is a teenager, the self control this dude has is hilarious (bc I’m pretty sure if he’d kissed WWX right then and there Wi-Fi would be like: you mean we could’ve been doing this the whole time?).

I know that WWX is Oblivious(tm) but I swear Xiao Zhan plays him very much like a disaster (bi) trying to flirt with someone he actually has a crush on and he can’t? Because his usually suave bullshit doesn’t work? And he wants to see LWJ all riled up? I mean, he’s oblivious to LWJ’s monster crush on him, but I’m pretty sure he knows/suspects he’s into LWJ himself.

Ooooohhh LWJ is spitting mad. I love how Wang YiBo can make facial expressions without actually moving his face.

One Braincell Trio gossip sessions are the best. And I saw at least one translation of JC’s “nobody will save you” that was “nobody will bury your corpse” which I find fucking hilarious.

Ngl, I was mildly worried that they were going to try and use WWX as a red herring this early in the tv show when LXC asks LWJ who he’s seen creeping around the back of the mountain and he answers that he’s seen WWX, but LXC is co-captain of the ship (the other captain is Shijie, NHS is Second-in-Command) and he didn’t disappoint.

Uuuuughhhhhh it’s that bitch Su She. If you see random bouts of screaming just assume Su She is on screen and I don’t want to deal with his bs.

I can’t believe they changed Water Ghouls to Water Ghosts. Ghouls is cooler.

[We interrupt this broadcast to inform you that all that commentary above ^ is from a few days ago, so if the following looks like I’ve lost the thread in some places... I did lose it]

Yooooo JC’s stupid grin and his awkward attempts at talking to WQ give me life. I NEED FURTHER WQ&SHIJIE INTERACTIONS! THEY MUST BECOME FRIENDS.

What a cute gremlin my god.

You can see the moment LXC decides to be both the best wingman and a shit to his little brother.

WN IS HERE HI WN WE LOVE YOU.

LXC and all his baby chicks lol.

(I just checked on my cat, he’s drugged to the gills, so his inner eyelids are half closed and he’s doing the mlem, it’s hilarious)

WangXian: the fucking lake does fucking what?

I love WWX in detective mode.

THANK YOU. WWX’s alcohol thing is driving up the wall. One, bc he’s a damn kid in here, two bc he’s about to go night hunting, and three bc I’m pretty sure he’s 👌this close to forming a habit.

Ooohhh I hate this. I’m not scared of large bodies of water or anything, but the second you tell me something bigger than a trout may be roaming nearby I’m nope-ing right the fuck out.

He just saved your ass dude, don’t call him boring!

I swear LWJ almost had a Qi deviation when he told WWX to stay away from him, and the the gremlin just came suuuuuper close to him and bent down... to get his sword. You know, like a normal human being would do. Not.

Nooooope. Wait “aqua demon” that better not be Netflix’s translation of Waterborne Abyss.

Su She’s whole damage is bc he thinks LWJ looks down on him just for wanting to be like him. But LWJ clearly said get tf on your swords and fly, not “send your sword into the lake like a dumbass” so Su She is a moron.

I know in an adaptation WWX ends up in the water when trying to save Su She, are we sure that he didn’t kick him off the sword? Bc he is That Bitch.

WN NO.

THE COMB.

LOQUATS! (Btw are they any good, how do they taste?)

That is all for this episode. Thank you for reading!

#the untamed #cql #mdzs live action #mdzs #foxglove watches cql #foxglove watches the untamed #wangxian #wei wuxian #lan wangji #commentary #episode 5 #foxglove has a cat #well foxglove has four but only one lives with her

[dredshirtroberts]

Hooooo boy we are feelin some EMOTIONS today, folks.

this is not a happy post, if you’d like to skip I entirely understand, and in fact encourage doing so.

I’ve been needing to do a one of these for a lil bit because I’ve got Thoughts and Feelings and they are complicated and I can’t accurately parse them in my head so we’re gonna air it out on Tumblr like a sheet on the line during laundry day.

here’s the thing.

I got some complicated family feelings in my chest places and it fucking *sucks*.

I was kept from spending time with my family by various means over the past several years to the point where I wasn’t attending holidays - which, in my family, is just not done. You can skip a holiday but you have to make it up on another occasion and I...wasn’t doing that anymore. Two separate people had me convinced I was not loved by my family, that they did not care for or appreciate me like *they* could and that I was better off not being around my family.

And maybe they had some valid points. Which I hate admitting because they used a lot of “valid points” to get me to be completely isolated in life without anyone but them and any time I branched out I was, for lack of a better term, “punished” for having denied them my attention or time or whatever. (this is of course not as nuanced a take on it as I would prefer but this is already going to be long without me going through the whole...everything, again. You can search the captain rambles and life post tags on my blog for more on this topic).

Anyway...so I’m no longer with people who are actively trying to keep me from talking to other people/being around people who are supportive of my own efforts and goals, etc. And I was welcomed back into my family with open arms and that was...honestly unexpected. After everything I’d had told to me about how they were and how they should be and what I should feel about them...I wasn’t expecting them to love me.

I rode that rose-colored wave for a *while*. But as the world descends into chaos and I learn more things about myself that make me feel more like *me* than I have...possibly ever now that I try and think about it, I am seeing things that I had hoped had been exaggerated or made up by those in my life who had hurt me.

My parents raised me in a very right-wing conservative household. The evangelical style of christianity didn’t come until I was already an adult but the building blocks must have been there or it wouldn’t have happened so...extremely when it finally did. There were a lot of...really shitty attitudes towards other people that I didn’t recognize growing up in it - I didn’t recognize it until a lot later, in fact.

They’re...They don’t see anything wrong with the way they are. Which, you know, *sucks*. 

There’s going to be a lot of dismissive phrases littered throughout this because I’m trying to be...i don’t know. I do it as a thing to lighten the mental load on myself - dismissiveness and joking around, exaggerating for effect, etc. - which i know might come off weird but like...this is really fucking bothering me guys and I...I’m doing my best.

Cause here’s the thing. I was raised believing the world was one way and that we were *right* about things. We had the answers and anyone (liberals) who didn’t agree with us were wrong and would either see the light and come to our side or were too stupid to know how wrong they were so we wouldn’t have associated with them anyway. (reasons why i’m currently frustrated with the political opposition to Republicans/Conservatives/The Right #1 actually)

And then I grew up and I saw the world was not that way. And I expected that my family would be able to see the world with the insight I had gained, and..they just...don’t.

I’ve excused a lot of their shit beliefs recently. not like, trying to defend them to anyone or anything but I don’t confront them. Mostly because I know while they won’t say it to my face, I know how they think about people who think like me (because I was there for those conversations, I was there and I thought like them and now i don’t and that makes me one of those idiots they talked about, a stupid person who can’t see the truth they believe so fully that they think is backed up by facts and figures but their facts and figures are *flawed* - mine aren’t better but I can acknowledge that and extrapolating data from all the things and coming to a conclusion is what I was taught to do but now that I do it for the wrong side what must they think of me? What must they say behind my back?)

I have...a lot of kinda fucked up shit about my family. Nothing overt, nothing that immediately screams to me “Hey fuck-o, this shit isn’t a universal experience and something is wrong here!” but it’ll be small things that I’m like “Ah, okay. Not everyone had this experience and those that did are currently working through the *trauma* of it by going to *therapy*. Hm.”

I’ve done some work in that respect and that’s good. Doesn’t make my issues go away but makes it so I can handle them a little better. Most of the time anyway.

I’m trying to make several things that are true but contradictory work together in my brain and it’s not going well.

1) my family cares about me and wants me to do well.

2) my family has hurt me in the past and is currently hurting me (though not intentionally and not maliciously - please dear god let it be unintentional and non-malicious). 

3) My family does not “agree” with LGBTetc people.

4) My family do not believe that there are systemic issues inherent in the government we live in/under and the society we must participate in (Because it benefits them, and they have not had to challenge their thoughts on this before).

5) My family are kind of racist.

6) My family was my only support system when I was leaving an abusive situation.

7) ...My family might have abused me a little.

I go back and forth on point seven a *lot*. See point 2 about the intentionality/maliciousness factors. If they didn’t mean to do it, does it still count? 

Does it matter if it still hurts?

My sister outright told me that she doesn’t agree with trans people (meaning she doesn’t believe you can be trans, really). But I’m okay because it’s me, and now I can be her gay best friend when we’re drinking at family stuff.

She didn’t understand why I was hurt by that. I attempted to explain it and she got defensive and angry so I just...didn’t fight about it. Just played the part. I’m her brother when it benefits her but otherwise I’m still her sister. I’m still mom and dad’s daughter. Even though I told them I’m not a girl. I told them I’m a guy.

Dad’s response was the most favorable initially and I think...he might eventually come around to it (he’s always wanted a son. he has a boy dog and has also imprinted really hard on his lawn roomba about it). He also might...not.

I’d like to transition further. Eventually. If it’s feasible. But also, right now it’s not. Right now it’s me cutting my hair short and not wearing dresses or skirts (even though they’re super comfy) because I want to avoid being misgendered as often as possible. It’s binding for uncomfortable and unsafe lengths of time because I am a MAN dammit, and I will be a man at this family function in whatever way I can. And when I go to the length that I do to be seen the way I want to be seen and I am *ignored*....

fuckin’ hurts you guys. I just fuckin’ hurts. 

And I want to correct them. I want to stand up and say STOP YOU’RE HURTING ME. PLEASE. I AM NOT A GIRL. I HAVEN’T BEEN THIS WHOLE TIME I JUST DIDN’T KNOW WHY I DIDN’T FEEL RIGHT AS A GIRL. PLEASE JUST CALL ME A BOY, USE MY PRONOUNS, USE A NEW NAME OR AT LEAST THE NICKNAME THAT ISN’T MY FULL NAME. 

but i don’t.

because I’m scared of losing them again.

And it’s fucked up because they’re *already* lost. They’re Fox-watchers and Trump-supporters and they don’t want to listen to science or facts or *anything* outside of what’s presented to them by pundits and talk show hosts, and the fucking EIB network with their political propaganda for anything that isn’t what the liberals want.

And I don’t know that I can get them back because they’re *real* far down that particular rabbit hole. And I’m...I’m just trying to figure out what I want in life. What makes me happy. And part of what I want is what I always wanted and never had.

I want my mom and dad to look at me, see me, see what I do see how I try and what I love and care about and tell me that I’m enough. That they love me because this is who I am and I am enough for them. Even if I wasn’t accomplished and didn’t try they would still love me because I’m *me*. and I’m their *child* and they *love me*.

And GOD it is so FUCKING painful to know that’s not a realistic thing to hope for. Because I’ve been trying for 28 GODDAMN years doing ANYTHING and EVERYTHING I can to be enough for them. I played good, christian, conservative little girl for SO goddamn long, even when I wasn’t Christian or conservative anymore, even when I saw the cracks, I wanted to be what they wanted.

And even now that I *am* what my dad wanted (a son) I’m not enough because to him i’m still a girl, to my mom I’m the failed daughter the one she didn’t do enough for so now it’s about how she fucked up and not about NO. This is ME. Stop. Stop LOOKING at me like that WHEN YOU DON’T SEE ME. YOU SEE SOME IDEALIZED VERSION OF ME WHO WAS NEVER GOING TO EXIST BECAUSE SHE WASN’T ENOUGH EITHER.

...

This is a lot more than I thought it would be, pain wise tonight, guys. My bad. 

I’m still struggling with my eating habits, I’m still struggling with my self-worth, and finding what makes me feel fulfilled. I’m getting better at some of it though.

I’ve smiled and laughed more in the past week or so than I have since I came out to my family. I wouldn’t have done that without my very very good friends who are very very kind to me and god I wish I could do more than draw stupid pictures and write stupid stories for them but it makes them happy too? so i’ll just do what I can and maybe it’ll be alright. 

Gonna try not to fall too deep down the abandonment issues pit tonight folks. I’m already upset enough. 

Good talk.

#I was fine and then all of the sudden I was no longer fine #whoops #lol #processing trauma'll do that to a guy i guess #the captain rambles #LIFE POST #haven't tagged that in a while heh #not feelin so great tonight babes but i'll be alright eventually #i love all of you very much and if you ever feel lost or alone or are hurting (esp because of family) please know i am here for you #i don't want any of you to feel that way about it #come to my DMs send me an ask whatever you need #i love you be safe be healthy and most of all be kind

[gvbejvmes]

Task: Adjective

Title: Artistic Rating: PG-13 Characters: Gabriel James-Michaels, Francis James, Nancy Conrad/James/Scott, Georgiana James Adams, Cesar “Flaco” Rodriguez, Bella James, Jonathan James-Michaels, Other family referenced Pairings: Implied Gabriel James/Nancy Conrad, Gabriel James-Michaels Warnings: The usual Francis James warnings for child abuse/endangerment and homophobia. Summary: 5 times someone saw the artistic side of Gabriel, and 1 time he saw himself as artistic. 

Artistic [ahr-tis-tik], adj: 1) conforming to the standards of art; satisfying aesthetic requirements, 2) showing skill or excellence in execution, 3) exhibiting an involvement in or appreciation of art, especially the fine arts, 4) of art or artists, 5) of, like, or thought of as characteristic of an artist.

1980

This was the last place in the world Francis James wanted to be. Needing to close the store early to go to the elementary school was pretty low down on his list of priorities, but it wasn’t like he had a choice in the matter. The school had insisted on this parent/teacher conference, and there was no way in hell Maria was going. She was pregnant and had a two year old to take care of; home was where she belonged. Besides, if he sent Maria to this meeting, she was likely to miss something important. His wife was an above average homemaker, but she wasn’t the sharpest tool in the shed. This was something he needed to do, and if it was important, he’d tell Maria about it later. 

“Gabriel is a very special boy.” The kindergarten teacher began. She’d told him her name at some point, but Francis couldn’t be bothered to remember it. Anyone who taught kindergarten wasn’t a real teacher anyway; they were a glorified babysitter. He didn’t like the way she talked about his son. Sure, his son was a bit on the special side, his bizarre relationship with his sister being a contributing factor, but who was this woman, this stranger to call his son special? He knew what that meant from the way she phrased it. 

When it was clear she wasn’t able to figure out what to say next, Francis decided to take pity on her. “Are you trying to tell me that my boy’s r***rded?” That wasn’t something Francis would have guessed. He was a bit of a sissy, but that was his mother’s doing. She babied him and allowed him to get away with bullshit like playing with her make up. It was behavior that could be corrected with a good belt. He wouldn’t consider being a pansy the same as being a r***rd. 

The teacher seemed flustered all of a sudden. “No! I didn’t mean special like that Mr. James.” She tried to soothe over, looking as out of place as Frances felt. “What I should have said was that Gabriel sees the world differently than the other students in my class.” The teacher continued on before pulling out a couple of what he assumed were his son’s drawings. 

One of them was a coloring sheet with the outline of an apple. It was only half-filled, the color only filling the edges. The other drawing was black crayon with white circles pressed into it. 

“Gabriel hasn’t been able to complete a single one of our art assignments. And when it’s time for art to finish, he refuses to stop. This piece-” She gestured to the apple. “Took the entirety of art. When I asked him why he didn’t finish coloring it in, he told me that apples are many colors and that he was trying to get the reds just right. And this one-” She gestured to the black drawing. “Was supposed to be a star. We were practicing our shapes, but he didn’t want to draw a ‘fake’ star. He only wanted to draw what they really looked like. Mr. James, have you thought perhaps about homeschooling Gabriel? There are plenty of art classes where his talents will be fostered.”

And there it was again. This art bullshit. It was the constant scribbling and coloring he insisted on doing. Boys weren’t supposed to be artistic. They were supposed to be strong and masculine. His son was supposed to be playing sports and playing in the mud. This shit was not what little boys were supposed to do. 

“I’ll take care of Gabriel.” Francis promised. “Don’t worry about him.”

1990

“Is it just me or did Gabriel James get hot over the summer?” It was the first day of school and Nancy Conrad was taking inventory of how summer treated everyone. If she wanted to continue to give the senior girls a run for their money, she needed to know everything about everyone in the junior class. There were a couple of girls she needed to keep an eye out for. Girls who left sophomore year with no boobs and who were entering junior year with boobs. There was a chance they could try to compete with her, and she was not going to allow that to happen. 

She leaned against the bank of lockers as Rachel Gilroy stuck pictures up. To their right, Tiffany Owens leaned against the lockers as she filed her nails. These were her girls. They made the cheerleading team together, and next year they would absolutely be the girls ruling that squad. There was no one Nancy trusted more in the world than Rachel and Tiffany. They’d been friends since they were kids and would continue to be friends; Nancy just knew it.

Tiffany made a dismissive sound. “I think you’re barking up the wrong tree there, Nanc. I don’t think you’re his type.” She continued shaping her nail for a moment, but Nancy was convinced that Tiffany was just leaving her to stew. “I sat next to him in English. He’s… artistic. He spent the whole time doodling.”

Rachel closed her locker and shot Tiffany a confused look. “What’s wrong with that? I doodle in my English notebook, too.” And it was more or less along the lines of what Nancy was thinking.

The sound of the nail file stopped, and Tiffany looked at both of them. She looked frustrated, like Nancy and Rachel weren’t getting what she was trying to say. “No, I mean he’s artistic. You know, like… artistic.” When it became very clear that Nancy and Rachel still didn’t understand, Tiffany rolled her eyes. “I think he’s a f*g.” 

Nancy froze. She’d never met anyone who was gay before, but she’d seen movies. She knew what gay was supposed to look like, but Gabriel didn’t fit that stereotype. He was hot, and he played Varsity baseball. If Tiffany thought he was gay, well, then, maybe that wasn’t a friend she needed in her life after all. 

“I bet you he’s not.” She smirked at her friend. “I can guarantee that by the time I’m through with him, there won’t be an artistic bone in his body left.” 

2000

There was something about watching G paint that had always been mesmerizing to Georgie. It was like he went off to another place every time. The new No Doubt CD echoed throughout the garage as G knelt on the ground, pouring melted crayon onto a canvas. He worked quickly, moving the colors around before they set. When a color set too soon, he would stop, hold his lighter over the spot, and move the wax around until it did what he wanted. He was so focused when he worked, and it was like watching someone dance with the way his arms moved about the canvas.

CJ was hitched up on her hip, watching as her dad worked. The toddler was quiet, watching G with the same intensity as she watched Beauty and the Beast with her sister. They were supposed to be calling him in for lunch, but it was hard to interrupt him when he was in the zone like this. A part of Georgie couldn’t help but to wonder if this was how people felt when they watched Picasso or Michelangelo work. Her brother was going to be a big name one day. She just knew it. With his talent, he deserved so much more than the life he’d been given.

“Are you guys just going to hover or did you want to see what I’m working on?” And G always did seem to know where his kids were whenever they were in the same room. He always seemed to know where Georgie was, too, but she pushed that thought aside and instead brought her niece closer to where her brother was working.

She blinked as she finally was able to get a better look at what he was working on. It wasn’t a canvas like she had thought. It looked like he was using the easel DJ had broken last week as a canvas. He’d sanded it down and it was the easel that he was pouring the paint onto. She’d never seen anything like it before, and she swore one of the figures he was creating almost looked like -

“Aunt G, it’s you!” CJ screamed out in absolute delight. She touched the melted crayon, and G let her, using his daughter’s pudgy fingers to pat down the wax just right. “Daddy, you draw me, too?”

G laughed as he put his tools off to the side. “Not today, princess. Another time.” He promised before scooping CJ out of Georgie’s arms. “Is it time for lunch?”

CJ nodded. “YES! Grilled cheeses!” And she announced it like it was the best food ever.

As they retreated back into the house, Georgie continued to stare at the painting. Her fingers lightly traced the outline of her own face. She would never understand the language her brothers seemed to be able to speak - Eli with his machines and G with his ability to turn normal objects into, well, this. She didn’t understand how they could just look at something and know what it could be. It wasn’t a skill she had been gifted like them.

“You’re not supposed to touch art, you know.” G drawled from where he was leaning against the doorjamb, CJ no longer in sight. “Do you like it?” He asked softly as he wandered back over to the painting. Next to the figure of Georgie, another figure was in the early stages of being sketched out. 

She nodded slowly, her fingers never leaving the canvas. “You see me differently than I see me.” Georgie’s voice was soft. “You see something feminine and I see something that’s not.”

G’s hand slipped into hers. “Georgie…” He started out, but she shook her head - stopping him.

“I know what you’re going to say. It’s the same damn thing the doctor said, and D said. Being infertile doesn’t make me any less of a woman. Yeah, yeah yeah.” She huffed out a harsh breath. “Men can procreate. Even Satan herself can have kids and I’m just… broken.”

It was quiet. G was either waiting for her to say something or he just didn’t know what to say. With him, it could be either. She couldn’t always read him.

“Who are you going to put here?” She slipped her hand out of her brother’s and instead stepped even closer to the drawing, trying to make out what his stray marks meant. The bodies looked like they were coming from the same crayon, from the same body. Like they were born the same. “Not D.”

G shrugged. “I haven’t really planned that far ahead. I’m just letting it happen.” 

Georgie nodded. “That explains all the marks. You’ve always hated painting yourself. This is how you see me, right?” She took a step back. “Paint you like I see you.”

2010

“I don’t get it, man.” Of all the places Cesar had wanted to go while he was in New York, the MET had not been on his list of priority sites. He wanted to go to all the baseball stadiums near the city, and to Coney Island, and to Ellis Island, but a museum hadn’t been on his list of places he wanted to go. Hell, he wouldn’t have even known about the MET if Michaels hadn’t told him about it. It had taken a lot of pushing to get James to bring him to the MET, and when he did it was kind of scary. The staff acted almost like they were afraid of him, and they roped off the section of the museum Cesar had wanted to see .And it wasn’t like James was being a bitch. He was nice; they just knew who he was and wanted to be accommodating. It was insane. 

There were other pieces in the room they were in, but not many. Cesar’s only focus was on the metal structure in the center of the room anyway. He walked around the cage, a replica of the cell they’d shared when they’d been incarcerated. “Why would you want to be reminded of that shit? The second I was out, I pretended like it never happened.” Sure, his wife brought it up from time to time when he was bugging her too much, but he didn’t give prison a second thought. 

James pushed on a bar which gave way, allowing for Cesar to climb inside. “Lay down. If it makes you feel any better, I’ll get in there with you and we can pretend it’s old times.” He sounded sarcastic about it, but Cesar knew it was a real offer.

As soon as he laid down and looked up at the ceiling, he couldn’t help but to stare. He’d slept on the top bunk and had spent many nights counting the cracks in the cement. This was definitely an upgrade. The way James had painted it, he felt like he was outside. Not laying in a replica of a cell he’d once shared. “James… Hot damn.”

The other man laughed, and squatted down to his level. He didn’t crawl into the cell with him, but Cesar figured it would always be more difficult for James than it was for him. “It’s not about remembering where we were, Flaco. It’s about seeing the possibility - even in the worst places.”

He didn’t know if it was what he said or if it was how he said it. All he knew was that it had him laughing his ass off. “I thought you were gay in LA. Dude, New York has made you extra gay.” He managed out between laughs.

“Guess I’m not showing you where Dodgers stadium used to be then. No Ebbets Field for you.” James managed out, pulling a face.

Cesar scrambled out of the cage, still laughing. “Don’t you dare. It’s the Mecca man. Holy ground. I need to take some dirt back to Mama.” He said, before sobering up. “James… how come you didn’t want me to know that you made it? You’re a fixture at a world famous museum. Why aren’t you screaming it from the Empire State?” 

His friend shrugged. “It just happened. It’s not a big deal.” But he could tell from his face that it was definitely a big deal.

“We are very different people.” Cesar said with a shake of his head. “Very different people.” 

2020

Bella James mostly liked going to school. She liked the days she got to go to art school with GG best. Even if he was the teacher and she had to share him with the class. Regular school was okay, too. She guessed. They got to play a lot and sing. She liked to sing. It reminded her of Mommy. And it was the same as her cousins. And sometimes they did art too. She didn’t like that art as much. It wasn’t as fun as GG’s art. The teachers didn’t like when she said that though.

Today was a day they had art, and she was coloring and coloring. Daddy’s Day was coming up and they were supposed to draw a picture of their daddies for a present. She didn’t have a Daddy to draw anymore, but she had a GG. And his real name was Dad so he definitely counted as a Daddy. 

The white piece of construction paper sitting in front of her was perfect for what she wanted to do. She picked up a blue crayon and started coloring. She tried to do big swooshy lines like one of GG’s pictures. After the blue, she added green swooshes before picking up a black crayon and drawing a box around her swooshes. Her tongue stuck out of her mouth as she evaluated her work.

Drawing GG was always the hard part. Sometimes he had hair; sometimes he cut it all off. Sometimes he had whiskers; sometimes his face had a big beard like Santa. Even still, sometimes his face felt like skin. That one was weird; she didn’t like that one. Right now he had hair and some whiskers, but not a Santa beard. 

With a nod she started drawing his head first. Black hair. Then gray over top. Gold eyes. A nose. A mouth with his ciggy pop. Then she did a black shirt and drew jeans. No shoes. GG didn’t like shoes either. Then, his arms. His arms were hard to color. He had too many pictures on his arms.

Once she was done, she smiled. GG was going to like it. She just knew it. The teacher didn’t seem to like her drawing, but she knew GG would. It was him and one of his own pictures. If Billy could draw his Daddy riding a bike, then she could draw her GG making art. She couldn’t very well draw him making kissy faces with Grandpa Jay. That would be weird. And he only ever did two things.

When she gave the picture to him later he really liked it and even said the words Mommy said she wasn’t supposed to copy. He even hung it up in the room where he made art. He said art should be surrounded by art before tickling Bella’s face with whisker kisses. She liked when GG was happy. It made her happy, too.

Present Day

Currently there was a bridge in Gabe’s home studio. It wasn’t like it was permanent or anything. Just semi-permanent he supposed. It had wheels that locked in place when he needed them to. It was high enough where he could sit above large pieces for better coverage, but low enough that he was actually able to work from it. Usually he used it for pour pieces, or if he was building something and needed a little extra height. Today he wasn’t entirely sure what he was doing. 

He was laying on his stomach, hovering over his current project which had accidentally taken up most of his studio. It was so large that he was going to have to figure out how he was eventually going to get it out of his studio, but that was a problem for another day. A large piece of plywood was on the floor, pieces of wood lining the edges, like he was pouring concrete. On top of it was a six foot by six foot canvas (okay, a couple of smaller canvases carefully superglued together) lay in the middle of the room. On the bridge with him, he had a container with carefully layered acrylic paint, a container of an oil and additive mixture, a container of white paint, and a container of bleach. 

The corners had been where he started. He saturated the canvas in bleach, wanting to see how it would affect the next step. Then he had poured the oil. He wasn’t sure how well the oil would do, even with the additives. The goal was for something solid, but translucent. After the oil, he poured the paint mixture. The colors had spread nicely, and he was sure that when he looked at the cameras mounted in the corners of the room, he would have some good shots for YouTube and TikTok. 

Now, he was pouring white paint into the spots where paint hadn’t settled yet. Currently it was just a wet mess, but there was potential. If his drying experiment worked, it could turn out nice.

As he worked a white light began to flash by the door. It had been a compromise for having his home studio in the house. A light in the studio was rigged to flash one color when someone rang the house doorbell, and another color when someone hit the buzzer outside the studio door. It was the only way he wouldn’t be scared out of his fucking mind when someone was trying to get his attention. He’d destroyed more than a couple potential pieces due to getting so caught up in his work and not realizing someone was there. This system worked better than anything else they’d found. He’d always responded better to light than sounds anyway.

He probably looked insane. His hair was sticking in every direction. His glasses were in his hair somewhere. The parts of his face not covered by his respirator were dotted in paint. Hell, his respirator had more paint on it than was probably healthy, too. He was wearing pink dish washing gloves, but his arms were still covered in paint, as were his ancient jeans, and his bare feet. He probably should have put on his coveralls on, but he actually hadn’t realized how messy this project was really going to be.

“Wear a mask if you’re coming in. The paint fumes are pretty bad. The additives attached to the paint molecules and it’s pretty toxic up in here.” He warned. Due to the materials he worked with, the studio door was always locked when he was in here. If it was Bella at the door, she would have an adult with her, but she knew if the door was closed, she wasn’t supposed to bother him anyway. 

A couple of minutes later, his husband walked into the room, snapping the baby gate in place behind him. Bella knew not to come into the room, but if the door was open, the dogs would try. The baby gate had definitely helped with that. 

“You were not kidding about the smell. How are your eyes not watering?” Jay blinked a couple of times before coming over to the bridge to get a better look at what Gave was working on. “Is it bonding?” He slid his hands up the back of his thighs as he stared at the paint for a couple of minutes.

“No.” Gabe admitted, sounding too sullen for his own good. More often than not his art experiments didn’t work, but he had done a few smaller test pieces and thought this one would work. Maybe the canvas and plywood combination wasn’t strong enough for all the paint. “I have a combination of sealer and resin I’m going to pour, but I think it needs to set before I try that.”

There was a quick swat to his ass as his husband pulled away from him. “Good. The girls made dinner.” He must have pulled a face because Jay continued on. “It is, unfortunately, inedible. Juliet just got back with pizza.”

He wanted to be surprised that he lost six hours, but it happened when he got pulled into a project. “Oh thank fuck.” He sat up and pulled his gloves off, dropping them onto the bridge before shimmying onto the ground. “I’m starved.”

His husband didn’t respond. The other man was watching the colors shift under the soft light lamp in the room. It didn’t surprise Gabe at all. He could always tell if a piece was worth continuing by the look on Jay’s face. All the critics in the world could fuck off. The only reaction and feedback he ever needed was from Jay. He swore that he could live off his reactions to his art alone. 

Setting his glasses down on one of his work stations, he picked up another piece of plywood. “Help me put this over the frame? Juliet’s asshole cat keeps figuring out how to get in here.” He’s pretty sure it wasn’t until he moved around that Jay noticed the state he was currently in. 

“Yeah, you’re going to need to shower before you come anywhere near the dining room.” 

Gabe laughed. “You gonna come in with me and make sure I get all the paint off?” He wagged his eyebrows at him.

“Briel, the girls are right outside.” His husband replied, but he could see the amusement on his features.

He huffed, but he probably would have been more surprised if he’d said yes. Grabbing his paint splattered phone, he started towards the door that led into the wet room, instead of the door Johnny had come in through. “Hey, Jay?” The second his husband looked in his direction, he snapped a quick photo. “For the reference folder.”

As he closed the door to the wet room, he heard two things. The first was his husband muttering something about him being incorrigible. The other was the sound of the wood being shifted. It was the last sound that put the smile on Gabe’s face. 

Even if he couldn’t get the paint to set, this piece was a winner.

#drabble #CJ tasks #pairing: Gabe/Johnny #pairing: Gabe/Nancy

[alitaimagines]

request: “Hi! I just saw your Gaara X reader and got excited because this is a chance to ask for a Gai X female reader! I just recently rematch naruto and noticed there's not many X reader for him. So what I was thinking of a Shy artist that likes to draw hair secretly. Gai has a crush on but gets jealous because Kakashi can easily talk to her. Or something along those ideas I just thought a shy reader would be a cute idea for a guy like Gai.”

might gai x fem! reader

fandom: naruto

You were an artist for Konoha. You never really aspired to be a ninja so you decided to open up a a small art shop after you finished schooling. The business was thriving as much as it possibly could.

After the war, your shop gave light to a lot of those who lost loved ones. Many families had came in to ask for a painting of those who they had lost as well as family portraits. You did it at no cost and you were more than happy to paint it for them. Your family had not perished in the war but you did have a few friends who did pass and while you were grieving, you knew others had lost husbands, wives, brothers, sisters, etc. It was the least you were able to do.

Once everything was returning to normal, you found some solace in Kakashi. He was as quiet as you were and while you did know him prior to the war, the two of you became a lot closer after it. He was the quiet friend you’d rely on when you needed a break from work or life in general.

Being that you were close with Kakashi, it came in a deal. You were introduced to the quirky Might Guy. The complete opposite of Kakashi but you found him endearing whenever he got flustered around you.

You had seen Guy in passing a few times. You heard him and his mentee, Lee, constantly screaming outside of your shop. Whether it was about training, learning about the power of youth, whatever that meant, or wondering what to eat, you heard them at least one a day.

Kakashi would roll his eyes whenever he heard Guy screaming but you did like seeing Guy but it was a different story when it came to Guy himself. He was constantly at a loss for words when you were around. Your beauty and elegance always made him nervous and lose any train of thought. He was jealous at Kakashi because unlike himself, Kakashi was his usual smooth self.

//

You were closing up the shop for the day. You were cleaning up the brushes and putting away any supplies that needed to go in the back. You were working on a painting for Uchiha family. Sakura had came into your shop a few weeks ago and asked for a painting of the three of them. It was an easy job but it was hard to work with considering the picture was old and a bit rusty.

Just as you were about to lock the door, you noticed Guy approaching it. You opened it and gave him a small smile.

“Good evening Guy.” You said as you ushered for him to come in. “I hate to be that person but I’m closing in a few minutes.”

Guy felt the embarrassment rush to his face, “I’m sorry! But I was busy all day and-and I needed to give you this!”

He shoved a photo in your hand before continuing his speech, “I was wondering if you could draw this! Thank you!” Before you could respond, he was already running out the door. You chuckled to yourself and took a look at the picture.

It was a photo of him and his father. It looked considerably old since Guy looked like he was still in the academy when it was taken but you didn’t have time to question it. You put it in the to do immediately pile and walked towards the back to grab your purse.

//

The next morning arrived and you were walking considerably slower than usual. You had stayed up late watching a movie and now you were feeling the repercussions of it. You had found a coffee shop not too far from your shop and ordered their biggest cup.

Just as you were opening up the shop, you noticed Kakashi walking your way. “Good morning. I’m surprised to see you here so early in the morning. Did you need me to draw something?”

“No but I’m here on Naruto’s behalf. He was wondering if you were able to get a drawing done for him.” With that, Kakashi handed you another picture. This one was of Naruto’s two kids. “Of course, does he need it done right away or?”

“Deliver it to him whenever you can. It’s a present for Hinata’s birthday.” Kakashi explained. “She’s been wanting a drawn picture from you for quite a long time but her birthday isn’t for another two weeks. When you’re done, you could deliver it to me or have it delivered to his front desk.”

You nodded as you shoved the money back into Kakashi’s hand, “Tell Naruto it’s on the house. Just make sure to have Hinata hang it. I don’t really trust him with house decor.”

Kakashi laughed as he felt a presence not too far from him. He knew it was Guy. Kakashi knew about the school girl crush Guy had on you so whenever he was around you, he could feel Guy’s jealous aura.

“So I assume you got Guy’s picture last night?” Kakashi asked as you immediately began to laugh. “I did. He came in five minutes before I closed. He seemed in a hurry because he was stuttering everything he was saying and ran away before I could even say anything back.”

He shook his head from second hand embarrassment, “Yeah, of course he did. I need to head out now. This is my only time off for next few hours. I’ll see you around.” You waved him goodbye and entered the shop.

The store was not too busy nor empty. You were busy drawing Guy’s painting for most of the day. By the time night rolled around, you were putting the finished touches on Guy’s painting when Sakura walked in.

“Good evening Sakura, I’ll run and grab your painting for you!” You said as you left your stool and walked in the back. You dusted off any small dust that had gotten on it from the night before and walked back outside. “Here you go, I hope it’s everything you wanted!”

Sakura smiled, “I love it. It’s going in Sarada’s room. She seen your paintings and wanted one of all three of us. Who’s picture are you painting now?”

You turned around Guy’s painting and she was immediately mesmerized, “Wow, you have serious talent! I had no idea Lee came in here.”

“No, it was Guy who wanted the picture done. It’s a photo of his father and himself. Quite endearing, isn’t it? And I have to say, the picture is in great condition.”  You said as you had a smile hinting at your face.

Sakura was able to tell your feelings for the optimistic instructor right away, “He likes you, you know?” You gave her a flustered look as she laughed. “Anyone in a 10 mile radius is able to tell. You should give him a chance. He’s a great instructor and an overall sweet person.”

With that, Sakura walked out and left you to your own devices. You questioned what she said and took it into consideration. You knew that your shy nature wouldn’t have let you ask him out right away but you also knew that considering how shy Guy got around you, he’d never confess on his own.

//

You had sent one of your assistance to run and tell Guy that his painting was finished. He was surprised at how little time it took. He made sure that he didn’t look like a complete clown when he got to you.

When he reached your shop, he noticed that it was only you inside. You were already working on Naruto’s painting when he stumbled in. You heard him walk through the door and laughed as he tripped walking in.

“I have your painting done and ready.” You said flustered as you went towards the back. You grabbed the black paint that was on standby and did the only thing possible. You inscribed your number on the back of the painting. You made sure that the section you wrote the number was removable but noticeable.

You walked back out to see Guy looking at the paintings you had hung on the wall. He had left the money on your desk and you laughed knowing you hadn’t even given him an amount that was due.

“You should give it a few more hours to dry out.” You instructed. “It should be dry by the time you get back home but when you’re done, make sure to hang it as soon as possible.”

Guy nodded and just as he was about to leave, you did the only thing you were able to think of. You got on your toes and kissed his cheek. As soon as you pulled back, Guy was as red as a tomato. You were the same way and immediately went back to your paint station. Guy felt like he was walking on cloud nine as he left your shop.

When he got back home, he did the things you told him to do but he felt an envelope like feeling in the back. Turning the painting around, he did see an envelope. He ripped it from the back and opened it. It was your name and number written in black paint with a heart at the end. Guy’s heart racing a mile a minute made him sit down as he realized his crush had finally realized his cryptic feelings.

He was walking on air for the rest of the night to say the least.

-ALITA

#naruto #naruto imagine #naruto x reader #might guy #might guy imagine #might guy x reader