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heliads · 2 years

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harry potter x reader where reader has a reputation of being selfish or heartless and harry wants nothing to do with them until he sees them comforting a first year and pranking or threatening the person who hurt them and then harry just keeps pursuing the reader

just keeps pursuing them, anon?

masterlist

Harry Potter is in a spectacularly bad mood, and the school year has barely even begun. He’s supposed to be having a fresh start this year, like if he just funnels his attention into doing the things that he at least halfway enjoys, Harry will be able to avoid the other things pressing at his attention, such as the fact that the Dark Lord is back and no one seems to believe him.

It is, however, far easier to fly into a rage because of something as simple as Quidditch as opposed to spending his hours fretting about where Voldemort is now, so Harry latches onto this latest irritation with great haste. Nothing is trying to kill him at the moment, so he’s free to do as he pleases. That’s how it usually works around here, at any rate.

For everyone else, however, Harry just appears to be annoyed with something yet again. He makes his way into the Gryffindor common room after arguing with the Fat Lady for far too long (she swore that he was mangling the pronunciation of the latest password so badly that it was wrong, he believed otherwise) and slumps down into the nearest plush armchair.

A voice interrupts his morose staring contest with the fire. “I take it Quidditch practice didn’t go well today?”

If there’s one person who has never had the time to be intimidated by Harry’s various spurts of anger, it would be his closest friend. Hermione Granger barely spares him a glance from above the pages of their Transfiguration textbook, even though they have no homework thus far requiring her to read through such an abundance of pages.

Homework is, however, the last thing on Harry’s mind right now, just as it always is. “That’s the problem, Hermione, there was no Quidditch practice. I didn’t think any of the teams had booked the field yet, but when I went to sign up for the timeslot I wanted, there was already a name there.”

Hermione frowns. “Who was it, then? Don’t tell me Slytherin’s already started putting their players through their paces. They don’t even need to try out new students to fill the empty slots on their teams, we all know everyone just buys their way in anyway.”

Harry chuckles at the venom in her tone. Looks like Harry’s fervent house-based Quidditch superiority has started to leach into Hermione as well.

“It wasn’t Slytherin, actually, it was another student. They wanted the field booked so they and a group of friends could practice for fun, not even for the Quidditch cup.” He complains.

Hermione looks at him with a meaningful grin. “Why do I get the feeling I know exactly who that person was?”

Harry rolls his eyes. “Yeah, it was Y/N. Stop looking at me like that.”

Hermione spreads her hands casually. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

They both know that’s not entirely true, though. See, Harry’s been having troubles with Y/N L/N since their first year at Hogwarts. They’re known around the school for being vindictive and cruel, barely a shard of heart left beating in their chests. Y/N may be another Gryffindor, but Harry feels no more connected to them than a Slytherin.

In truth, Harry isn’t acting on much except rumors to form his opinion of Y/N. That’s why Hermione keeps teasing him about them, anyway. She thinks he’s being ridiculous to judge someone based on the gossip people tell for fun. As a victim of the grapevine himself, Harry knows that most rumors aren’t true, but from the few glimpses he gets of Y/N, he hasn’t seen anything to prove those whispers wrong.

Plus, he now gets to blame them on the lack of practice time, so Harry grouses with pleasure. “All the same, I really needed that field. If we’re going to win the Quidditch cup, we need to be ready. I could have used some extra practice time before we start tryouts for the year.”

Hermione gives a rather exasperated sigh and returns to her textbook. “We all know you’ll be fine, Harry. Besides, I’d wager that Y/N has just as much desire to practice with their friends as you do.”

Harry can’t exactly argue with that, so he switches the conversation to safer subjects and does his best to let the morning fade from his mind. Hermione even manages to cajole him into studying, a miracle of its own accord.

In fact, Harry ends up being so productive that afternoon that he breezes through the homework he has left. When Sunday rolls around and the entirety of Gryffindor House panics about all the work they’ve procrastinated until the last minute, Harry is left sitting around as he waits for everyone to cram in their essays and exam prep before Monday morning.

He wonders if this is how Hermione feels all the time, free to sit around and watch as her fellow students frantically scribble out sentences on everything from the beneficial properties of mandrakes to the educational exploits of Maeve, the famed Irish witch.

At last, when Harry’s impatience gets the best of him, he slips out of the common room, the door to the portrait hole thudding shut to the tune of dozens of scratching quills. He ambles aimlessly down the stone corridors, not entirely sure where he’s going, only that he’d like his journey to take up quite a good bit of time.

Harry would be content with passing his hours doing nothing at all, a rather well regarded tradition in every Hogwarts house but especially Gryffindor, yet when he emerges from a dusty stairwell near the eastern side of the castle, he discovers that this may not be the case.

There aren’t that many students out and about at this hour, which means that the scene unfolding before him likely wasn’t meant to be witnessed by anyone, least of all Harry. A small, somewhat mousy first year student was walking down the hall when he was accosted by a trio of much older students, perhaps fifth or sixth years that haven’t yet graduated from the thrill of tormenting younger kids.

They’ve cornered him in a less traveled part of the castle, one holding a wand to the poor boy’s throat while the other two casually search through the pockets of his robe in the hopes of finding something interesting. As Harry watches, one of the older boys holds up a golden Galleon that winks in the light, and pockets the coin with a grin.

Harry’s just made up his mind to do something about it when someone else storms onto the scene. Of all the people to rescue this trembling first year, Harry can freely admit that he wasn’t expecting it to be Y/N L/N, yet here they are, rolling up their sleeves in irritation and pointing their wand at the offending boys.

They call out hexes without a second thought, and moments later, the older boys are clutching faces that have suddenly broken out in intense hives, or fingernails that won’t stop growing. The bullies take off in the opposite direction, practically tripping over themselves in their haste to get away.

Y/N stows their wand away once more, then pauses to retrieve the Galleon from where it had fallen to the ground in the kerfuffle.

“I think you’ll want this back,” they say calmly, and hold the coin out to the younger boy.

He blinks at them in surprise, then carefully tucks it back inside the pocket of his robe and murmurs a quiet thank you.

Y/N just smiles. “Don’t worry about it. Those boys are nothing but trouble, honestly. The good thing is that those spells won’t wear off for quite some time. I’d like to see them finish their homework with nails so long they can’t hold a quill, wouldn’t you?”

The younger boy laughs tremulously, but seems to be doing better, especially when Y/N offers to walk them back to their common room. Neither the younger boy nor Y/N seem to have noticed Harry from where he still stands, half hidden in the shadows of the stairwell, so he’s free to gawk as he pleases.

He remains there for a few minutes longer, stunned over what he’s just seen. Harry thought that Y/N was supposed to be totally heartless, but heartless people wouldn’t go to the trouble of protecting and then comforting first year students.

He shakes his head to clear his mind of the troublesome thoughts and continues on his way. It appears that Harry might have misjudged Y/N after all. This is especially true given the rumors circulating around them with such frequency. There’s no way Y/N hasn’t heard the gossip, but they couldn’t care less about what others think of them. In all honesty, Harry’s kind of envious of their unflappable demeanor.

Perhaps that’s why he’s thinking about the encounter hours and even days later. Harry starts to keep a more careful eye out, and soon he’s noticing even more things than before. Y/N talks happily with their friends as they go to class, they pay attention even when facing down a blathering Professor Binns, and they enjoy practicing on their broom even though they’re not on the Quidditch team.

Harry doesn’t know how he didn’t notice it before, but he can’t escape the all-encompassing evidence that Y/N L/N is actually a really great person. It practically rocked his world, and he must not be doing as good a job of disguising his shock as he thinks, because barely a week after seeing Y/N in that hallway, Ron confronts him about it.

They’re sitting at the long Gryffindor table in the Great Hall, eating some breakfast before they start the day. Harry is sneaking the occasional glance at Y/N, who he can just make out farther down the table. His surreptitious surveillance is interrupted, however, by the sound of his own best friend calling him out.

“Listen, mate, are you actually going to hear a word I’m saying or just keep staring at Y/N?”

Harry blinks in surprise and dimly remembers that Ron had been talking about something, perhaps the Chudley Cannons setting a record by winning one game out of the last seven.

He does his best to sound present in the conversation. “Of course I’m hearing you. Chudley Cannons, right? I’m glad they’re doing well.”

Ron sighs. “We stopped talking about the Cannons ten minutes ago. You really are distracted by Y/N, aren’t you?”

Harry freezes. “No, I’m not. What are you talking about?”

Ron exchanges a significant glance with Hermione over the front page of her newspaper. “See,” she says matter-of-factly, “I told you.”

Harry frowns. “Told you what?”

Hermione arches a brow. “That you’re lost on Y/N, obviously.”

“I’m not lost on them,” Harry protests, although it sounds weak even to his own ears.

Ron and Hermione exchange yet another glance, which is starting to irritate him.

“Of course you’re not,” Ron says, although Harry gets the feeling the boy doesn’t actually mean it, “you’re just a little sidetracked. How about you talk to them or something instead of just staring? Seems like it would be a much healthier approach.”

Hermione bites back a laugh at Ron’s choice of words. “I think what we’re trying to say is that Y/N would definitely be open to talking to you if you just approached them. See, they’re leaving the table now. This is your chance.”

Harry stands up impulsively. “Yeah,” he says, “I think it is.”

Before he can stop himself, he hurries out of the Great Hall after Y/N. He catches up to them after a few seconds, and Y/N turns to greet him at the sound of his approaching footsteps.

“Hi, Y/N, how are you?” Harry asks, wondering why on earth he can’t seem to have a conversation past basic parlor conversation.

Y/N, however, seems or simply chooses not to notice. “I’m doing pretty well, actually. Same with that first year from the hall, by the way. I think I’ve had success with chasing off those boys.”

Harry nearly chokes on his own surprise. “What?” He asks, trying not to sound suspicious.

Y/N has the audacity to grin. “I know you were there last week, by the way. I did see you moving to stop them, sorry I got there first.”

Harry wonders if they think he’s weird for watching the whole encounter. “I’m glad the boy is doing well,” he offers, and they nod.

“I think he just didn’t know how to stand up to people. It turns out most everyone around here isn’t nearly as scary as they seem. All you have to do is talk to them.” They say.

Harry nods solemnly. “I’m starting to figure that out for myself.”

Y/N laughs, and Harry can’t help but smile along with them. “I’m glad to hear it.”

They’ve reached the base of one of the moving staircases right now, and Harry realizes with a panic that if he wants to say something, he’d better do it now.

He calls out to Y/N before he can stop himself. “Do you want to go out with me? You know, just to hang out sometime.”

They pause with their foot on the first step, then turn back with a grin. “I’d like that quite a bit,” they say, and Harry feels his entire chest lighten.

“Alright, then,” he says, “how about tomorrow night?”

Y/N’s eyes spark in the light from a nearby window. “Tomorrow night sounds wonderful.”

Harry waves goodbye, then heads back to the Great Hall with a smile on his face. As it turns out, he’s got a date.

harry potter tag list: @rogueanschel, @cameronsails, @neewtmas, @lovesanimals0000, @with-inked-solace, @sher-lokid7, @amortensie, @frenchgirlinlondon

#harry potter #harry potter imagines #harry potter x reader #harry potter oneshot #harry james potter #harry james potter imagines #harry james potter x reader #harry james potter oneshot

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cursedvibes · 6 months

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Where is this story going?? What is happening

I really hope kenjaku isn’t actually dead

I hope so too because that would be very dissapointing. All it took was to distract Kenjaku and cut off their head? I would've accepted it (kinda) if it was Takaba who killed them. Given Kenjaku's words, they would've preferred that too, expected it even to some degree, but having Yuuta barge in there and do it is so anti-climactic. He never had any real connection to Kenjaku that would give this move any meaning and the way he did it there was no way to form one either. Anyone could've stood in his place and done it, there's nothing special to it.

All the possibilities for how Kenjaku could "survive" don't seem very good to me either. Cursed Spirit makes no sense because Yuuta is right there, he could just destroy it again, stomp their brain to mush. Plus it would remove a lot of nuance from Kenjaku. Other option is that Kenjaku's CT reforms them somewhere else. The theory that more of their original body is left could be true and they come back through that somehow. Don't like that either because that version of Kenjaku would inevitably be different from the Kenjaku we knew before and I just don't like there being multiple versions around. The character development of the last chapters would've been for nothing. Even if the new Kenjaku is the exact same with the same memories (despite the brain not being the same or even missing? or can Kenjaku create little parasite brains that activate when the main one dies?) I don't like the implications for their cursed technique. Why take on vessels at all if they can regrow? I'd need a very good explanation to believe that.

Last option would be someone else finishes Kenjaku's plan, but I don't know who. Sukuna would feel weird because he has no passion for it at all, although at least he has a connection to Tengen. Yuuji being some sort of sleeper agent would be weird too and take what little agency he has away. He doesn't care about Kenjaku or their plans at all, so that would be very out of nowhere. I'd like Yuuji to step in Kenjaku's footsteps, but only if he does it consciously and I'd also like some actual conversation between them before all that happens. Could also be that Tengen gets freed now that Geto's body is dead for good and spreads chaos. Probably the option I like most? Because that means at least something came of that.

My main problem is that as far as I can see there will be no meaningful connection to Yuuji. They won't meet and they won't talk. With the positive development through Takaba I could've seen Kenjaku be more open and honest about their intentions with Yuuji, but Yuuta's actions ruined all that. Instead Kenjaku dies somewhere far away, while Yuuji is busy with Sukuna and doesn't spare a second thought about it. He wasn't even at the meeting discussing the plan for how to kill Kenjaku. No struggle of what being complicit in matricide would mean to him, he doesn't have to face his last close family member at all, doesn't have to deal with all his family issues and more importantly doesn't even get one good conversation with the person who is responsible for all his suffering. Sukuna hurt him more directly, but Kenjaku is the reason Sukuna is even here and used to be inside Yuuji. They birthed him just to be a vessel, an experiment. They dehumanized him and while they do care about him, Yuuji doesn't know that. That would've been very important to make his thoughts on Kenjaku more meaningful. To him they're just some person he met once, who attacked him with centipedes, told him confusing stories and then dipped with the Prison Realm in hand. Just some mad scientist he abstractly knows is responsible for his trauma and what his half-siblings went through. Plus a weird dream he once had and that he seems to want to forget.

He could still find out more about Kenjaku and their intentions and past (through Sasaki for example), but that will mean a whole lot less without Kenjaku actually being around.

Idk, maybe I'm looking at it too pessimistic, but I don't see a whole lot of good coming from this. We got proof that Kenjaku is capable of caring about people, even now, even ones they haven't known for very long, and it all seems to become meangless. Giving them depth just to cut them off when it becomes most important is such a weird decision. Depending on how Kenjaku's "will" manifests in the future, I might change my mind, but right now it just saps a lot of tension from the story. All they need to do is kill Sukuna and that's it? Well I guess they still need to stop the Culling Game somehow because with "Geto" dead the conditions for it to end won't be fulfilled. They could destroy the prime barriers Tengen errected, which will also destroy jujutsu society as is, but...idk Kenjaku succeeds in a way, but if that really is the end for them that makes this even more unsatisfying.

Anyway, we'll see...

#jjk spoilers #jjk 243 #kenjaku #jjk leaks #asks

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auronira · 2 months

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Being someone who is allo (just learned about the existance of this word) and cis, I want to talk about the hot topic of Alastor being shipped romantically and sexually by the fandom of Hazbin Hotel.

I understand that the topic I'm about to delve into may require some patience and open-mindedness. As a young individual seeking understanding, I implore you to hear me out before forming any judgments. English isn't my first language, so I apologize if my expressions seem weird, also it may take a while to get what I am saying here, I took a lot of time to get my point across so please give me a little bit of your time - especially if you are aroace or anywhere among that spectrum.

First of all, being cis and allo is obviously one of the most comfortable shoes you can wear within society. I am aware of that.

For instance, as someone who enjoys immersing myself in various forms of media such as books, movies, and video games, I often find characters and narratives that resonate with my experiences. This familiarity allows me to connect deeply with the stories and derive genuine enjoyment from them. I've never had to grapple with the challenges of feeling unseen or misunderstood in this regard, and for that, I am privileged.

Contrastingly, I recognize the struggles that members of the LGBTQ+ community often face. The need to repeatedly explain one's identity and preferences, the constant battle for visibility and acceptance – these are realities that I've never had to confront personally. My identity has always been accepted without question, and for that, I'm grateful. However, I'm eager to learn and empathize with those whose journeys differ from my own so please try and be patient with me.

To my fellow cisgender and heterosexual individuals who may be unfamiliar with what I'm about to explain: Consider the concept of "comfort characters" and why they hold such significance in our lives. For me, growing up, Katniss Everdeen served as my comfort character. Reflecting on her impact on my childhood development, I realize the profound influence she had. During a time when I was grappling with personal challenges that I wasn't yet ready to confide in my family about, my connection to Katniss provided solace. Through her character, I found the strength to envision myself facing adversity head-on, overcoming obstacles with resilience. It may seem trivial to some, given that she's a fictional creation, but the bond I forged with her played a pivotal role in shaping my identity.

I believe many of us can relate to forming such deep connections with fictional characters as we navigate through the complexities of adolescence and young adulthood. These characters serve as guiding lights, offering solace and inspiration during times of uncertainty. Even if you haven't personally experienced such a connection, I encourage you to consider the profound impact that representation can have on shaping one's sense of self and belonging.

Representation matters because it validates our experiences and identities, providing a sense of visibility and validation that is essential for personal growth and empowerment. Just as we find comfort and inspiration in the characters we admire, so too do marginalized individuals deserve to see themselves reflected in the stories they consume. It's through diverse representation that we foster empathy, understanding, and inclusivity within our communities and society as a whole.

Representation matters because it gives people characters they can relate to and admire. But not every character needs to be relatable for everyone to like them. For instance, I really enjoyed watching the relationship between She-Ra and Catra in the show She-Ra. Even though I'm straight, I can imagine the profound joy it brought to members of the LGBTQ+ community who could see themselves represented in a meaningful way. They relate to those characters differently than I do, and that's totally okay. Sometimes, fans want to see their favorite characters in certain ways, even if it's not exactly how the creators intended them to be. They create their own ideas about the characters to feel a deeper connection. While it's natural to want to connect with characters, it's also important to respect the original story and the creators' intentions.

While it's natural to seek characters with whom we can personally identify, it's equally important to appreciate the diversity of perspectives and experiences that representation brings. It's through this diversity that stories become richer and more inclusive, resonating with a broader audience and fostering empathy and understanding across different communities.

So what does that mean for aroace people when it comes to Alastor?

For this to understand I'm just gonna try and picture myself in a different pair of metaphorical shoes, but when it comes to being ace they may not even feel like shoes at all, but more as if you are running barefoot over the nastiest lego pieces in existance.

Imagine going to a bookstore and struggling to find something that aligns with your tastes. Maybe you spend hours searching, only to come up empty-handed. Perhaps you end up settling for whatever book is popular at the moment, feeling left out because there's no variety that speaks to you. Or maybe you turn to the internet, hoping to find your perfect book match online, but even that proves to be a challenge. In the end, you might resort to reading fanfiction because there, at least, the chances of finding representation are higher.

This struggle isn't limited to books but extends to movies, TV shows, and everything else. Constantly feeling like you don't belong can be painful and isolating. I wouldn't wish that feeling on anyone. Unfortunately, society can't change overnight, so we have to work with what we have for now.

The bottom line is, everyone deserves to see themselves represented in the media they consume. It's not just about personal preference; it's about feeling seen and valued in a world that often overlooks our differences. And until that becomes a reality, we'll keep pushing for change, one step at a time. Finally, there's that one character – in this case, Alastor – and for the first time, asexual individuals can feel that sense of connection I've been talking about. They feel seen and acknowledged, just as we all do when we find something or someone we can relate to. This is what books, TV shows, and video games are all about – providing us with enjoyment and a sense of validation, especially in a world that can be tough.

Representation of diverse sexualities in media isn't just important for LGBTQ+ individuals; it's beneficial for everyone. It helps broaden our understanding of each other and breaks down barriers without anyone having to change who they are to fit in. This is the power of art and the stories we consume – they have the ability to blur the lines between people and foster greater empathy and acceptance. Ultimately, it's about making everyone feel like they belong and have a place in the world.

I'll be honest – I don't really think about labels much anymore. I've found that they can sometimes divide people even further, which isn't what I'm about. It's not that I have anything against labels in general; I just personally don't dwell on them. However, I do recognize the subtle influence they can have on me, even though I consider myself quite open-minded.

I've come to a point where I've found peace in the idea that everyone should just be allowed to be themselves, as long as they're happy. I didn't actively choose to be straight; it's just who I am. And I don't expect anyone else to have to "choose" their sexuality either – they should just be able to exist and be happy. I've reached a mindset where I don't really give much thought to someone's sexuality when I see it portrayed in media. They're just who they are, and I'm just who I am. But I understand that for many people, having those labels is important for representation and visibility. Perhaps, initially, society needs those divisions in order for certain groups to feel seen and acknowledged. And while I may not personally identify with those labels, I can still appreciate their significance to others. At the end of the day, it's about acceptance and understanding, regardless of labels.

Returning to the topic of Alastor, now that there's this ace character, the fandom takes him and sometimes decides to change him to fit their own desires. It's similar (I guess) to the disappointment some feel when an author keeps a protagonist's appearance vague, only for fans to imagine them as the perfect, conventionally beautiful princess. This can be hurtful to people who don't fit that idealized image because they ask themselves "would the story be any different if she would be smaller, or chubby, or (insert whatever you want)?"

What's crucial to recognize here is that some fans might struggle to accept Alastor's sexuality because they feel like he has to be different for them to enjoy certain content without feeling guilty or needing to justify their actions. Our minds often try to protect us with such a mindset so we can feel good about ourselves and our choices. For some, that means trying to impose their beliefs on a character so they can comfortably engage with them in their own fanworks.

It's important to acknowledge that everyone interprets and engages with media differently. However, it's also important to respect the creator's original intentions and the representation they've provided. Trying to change a character to fit one's own desires can be disrespectful to both the character and those who identify with them.

Ultimately, it's about finding a balance between creative freedom and respecting the integrity of the source material.

Here are two key considerations that both sides should bear in mind, (if I even have the right to say anything as someone who is clearly underqualified when it comes to topics like that as a cis and allo):

On one hand, it's important for ace individuals to understand that people often enjoy engaging with characters in various ways, including through shipping and fanfiction. Characters may take on different traits or orientations in these creative outlets, and that's part of the fun and freedom of fan culture. However, when it comes to representation in canon material, it's crucial not to impose personal viewpoints onto characters solely for the sake of recognition. While it's acceptable to explore different interpretations in fan works, it's essential to respect the original portrayal of characters, particularly regarding their sexuality.

Reflecting on my own feelings on this matter, I've realized that I don't necessarily take issue with individuals changing the sexual orientation of straight characters in fanfiction. However, I become uncomfortable when there's an attempt to forcefully alter the canonical identity of a character. This discomfort arises from a sense that being straight is portrayed as incorrect or undesirable. This realization has deepened my empathy for the struggles faced by members of the LGBTQ+ community in seeking authentic representation in media.

This also brings me to the main point – the same principle applies to ace individuals when the community tries to forcefully change a character's sexuality, refusing to acknowledge their ace identity as portrayed in the show. Finally, ace individuals have a character to look up to who is even quite popular, only to see that representation invalidated or ignored because some people refuse to accept it – essentially, refusing to see them.

This kind of rejection can make ace individuals feel as though they need to conform to certain expectations in order to be considered "interesting" or "popular," just like Alastor. It's confusing and disheartening to see a character's identity denied or dismissed, especially when it's a rare instance of representation that could provide validation and visibility for ace individuals.

It would be VERY confusing for me, making me feel like, despite getting represented, I would not be enough.

I'd like to take a moment to clarify that while I enjoy engaging in fan works involving Alastor - some even portraying him romantically or sexually with another character, I wouldn't want him to be portrayed differently in the series. Changing his character in the serie itself in such a fundamental way would completely ruin the essence of who he is for me, much like what happened with characters such as Wednesday, Sherlock, or Loki. Despite my love for these characters, I felt that some of them should have remained as they were without delving into romantic or sexual storylines, as it would feel out of place, just as it would feel strange to me if Alastor suddenly showed romantic or sexual interest in anyone.

It's important to recognize that enjoying fan works doesn't necessarily mean wanting to alter the original outcome of the show or the character themselves. Sometimes, it's just for fun, without any deeper implications.

I don't have a definitive conclusion or a perfect solution to make everything peaceful – I'm not sure such a thing even exists. However, I believe that listening to each other and trying to understand one another, despite our differences, is crucial. I can only imagine how deeply hurtful it must be for ace individuals to see so much fan art of Alastor that conflicts with his established sexual orientation, but recognizing it as people having fun and drawing a line between canon and fanon is as important as it is for those who engage in such content to understand why ace individuals might feel upset about it, and to recognize that their feelings are just as valid.

We need to communicate with each other respectfully and without hostility.

I'm open to listening to anyone who might feel offended by anything I've written here – my goal in sharing these thoughts is simply to foster understanding and empathy. I never wanted to hurt anyone with my words, sorry in advance if someone feels triggered because of this.

#hazbin hotel #alastor #hazbin alastor #alastor aroace #aromantic #asexual #aroace #alastor the radio demon

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oshiawaseni · 1 year

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The deal with Togachaco

There was a little bit of confusion about what’s going on with these two and why Toga can’t use Shiggy and Dabi’s quirks. This is what I came up with about Toga's situation.

Disclaimer: this is all only theorycraft and any or all of it could be wrong of course!

My theory here is what’s lacking is not Toga’s love for them. She admits to caring about them. But their inability to love her. They lack any real connection. The two people who we know she has used quirks of are Twice and Ochaco.

Twice is obvious. They had a pretty close relationship and Twice felt very cared for when he died and told her that. Her heart broke for him so their feelings of love were reciprocated ones that had formed a strong connection and we aren’t talking romantic love, just love in general for another person. That’s what they had.

"But Ochaco didn't love Toga." True... but she did by proxy! One of Ochaco's key cornerstones is wanting everybody to be happy and smile. I think this was brought up again this chapter because it’ll be a very important theme for Toga’s arc to circle back to later!

During MVA, Toga’s love for Ochaco was reciprocated in a way - simply by default. There’s three points we should take note of here.

1. Toga was being loved back through proxy of Ochaco’s wide compassion for all of society.

2. Toga, someone who’s life has been utterly ruined from birth by her suffering of being excluded from society, is a *VALID* PART of society and is deserving of compassion, according to Ochaco's feelings.

3. Toga’s own quirk itself acknowledges Toga as a part of Ochaco’s “people," or "everyone," or "society." Even her own quirk knows she is valid and should be included in Ochaco’s compassion for everyone. (And now she genuinely cares for her too.)

And the deal with Dabi and Shigaraki: I really do think Toga’s quirk is affected by mutual love. Dabi and Shigaraki don’t have any love left in their body. All they are capable of right now is hate. They live for their hatred. This series is stacked up with parallels that juxtapose both love and hate against each other and this is another one. Those two will set themselves on fire in the name of hate. So Toga was unable to form a meaningful love connection with them. She can’t fully become them. Her quirk is the worst match with people like them.

Another interesting thing about Toga’s love is that Froppy (Hori) refers to it in Japanese quotation marks. I think this is more commentary of Toga not understanding what love means, and it’s like saying “love” to refer to it more as Toga’s concept of love. Something she obsessively fantasises about and thinks she understands, but doesn’t really.

Izuku also said to her: "If you love me, why don't you also want to share the same heart as me?" (values, morals, and protecting instead of hurting those she loves.) And this only made her think of her sad upbringing...

Toga never received any real love while growing up to form the basis of it. Not from her parents or her peers. Her quirk affects her personality a lot and is a factor in this too. So Toga-chan doesn’t really know what True Love is and I think that’s something Ochaco is going to help show her.

If her quirk works like this then her destiny was never meant to be a villain at all, as LoV are all bound together by hate for quirk society and they don’t know what love is either, which hinders her connection with them. So the only place her character can truly shine in, is when she is being surrounded by people she loves who can also love her in return. Like the condition to lift the beast’s curse in Beauty and the Beast.

I think Toga finding out what rule is affecting her ability to truly become people will be pivotal in saving her from all this mental pain she’s grown up with. This is her burden she's been baring all alone for years, and I believe whatever it is she has going on with Ochaco, will surely put some light into her heart, maybe for the first time ever.

#togachaco #Bnha 382 #kana writes #toga himiko #himiko toga #LOV #league of villains #bnha meta #i had this in my drafts hope it was interesting to read !#what do you guys think?

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kingdimitrx · 2 years

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Douma - A Rant

MANGA SPOILERS AHEAD. (This isn't my first rant and won't be my last.)

Okay fuck it all. I'mma rant about this man and say everything I want to say. Read it or not, ignore me or not, I'm doing it, sorry. Douma is canonically nuerodivergent. While it's not stated what his condition is, it's likely he might be affected by a very severe form of alexithymia. He knows and acknowledges that he's very different from other around him and has known this from a young age, however he puts up a very friendly and overly polite and kind facade so that he feels somewhat normal. He also overexpresses many emotions as he doesn't know how to feel them, what they should feel like, or how to understand them. (I find this very sad and relateable, and I think he's hella misunderstood as a character.) He was also raised as a devine being since he was very young, his cult (Eternal Paradise Cult) actually having been formed by his parents. They believed that he had connected to gods and could speak to devine beings, and so he was forced into the role of a cult leader/front since before he could talk. Contrary to popular belief that he's egotistical and a narcissist, this image was not one he created himself and it was forced on him by his parents.

He has known since he was very young that he didn't actually have connections to the devine, in fact he doesn't even beleive in gods, heaven, or hell. He belives death is death, there is nothing afterward. And he takes pity on those "desperate enough" to believe otherwise. He has also known since he was a child that he was nothing like anyone around him. Douma is clinically apathetic, meaning he is not neurologically able to experience or understand any emotion. He knows this about himself, however he is very, very good at masking it. Despite the fact that he doesn't know how to express emotion and often portrays too much of certain feelings, many don't know that he's different than them. Due to his clinical apathy, Douma is unable to form or hold meaningful relationships with people around him, which is likely why he was (seemingly) very unaffected when he witnessed the brutal murder of his father by his mother, and then her suicide.

While he didn't feel affected or care about this, I think it's likely he does have deep-rooted trauma related to this, but that's not stated or canon. Just knowing what I do about the human brain. Anyway, Douma became a demon at age 20. It is unknown what his reason was, but knowing Muzan and how the demon lord works, he was likely targeted by Muzan for his lack of identidy. Douma is not his real name; his human name is never revealed. It's unknown if he even had one. But Muzan is known for targetting and manipulating damaged, weak, naive, and/or desperate people to turn them into demons. It's likely that Muzan targetted Douma knowing that the man was deep down desperate to have an identidy. This is true, Douma's deepest desire is to expereince emotions, to be someone. He believes his life to be pointless, because he can't appretiate or fully experience the things around him. Do it's likely that the idea of not only becoming a demon, but becoming one of the extremely powerful Twelve Kizuki offered him a false sense of identidy. Even so, he still didn't feel like those around him. He had no one who loved him, and no one he could love. This left him feeling empty, as no matter what, he's unable to form social connections. He doesn't understand emotions or other people. Now. Enter Kotoha Hashibira; Inosuke's mother. Kotoha was a woman who had been forced to give birth to her son around 17-18 to a very abusive husband, along with a mother-in-law who bullied her daily.

One day while her husband was attacking her, she bit him and tried to escape on foot with Inosuke, who was less than a year old. She ran and ran, her abusive family chasing after her, until she eventually came upon the Eternal Paradise cult; i.e. Douma's home. When she arrived there, she ran to Douma, begging him for help and explaining to him that she had no parents, no siblings, no where she could go. Despite his lack of emotional understanding or empathy, it's known that Douma considers himself to be kindhearted, given he has multiple times "saved" humans who seemed to need help. (Saving could mean turning them into demons, killing them out of mercy, offering them advice, offering them shelter.) In Kotoha's case, he allowed her to stay with his cult, and she eventually became a follower and worshipped him. (It is worth noting that Douma murdered her ex-husband and his mother, deeming them too noisy and evil to keep around. He never ate them, he thought the were below that and left their bodies in the mountains.) Kotoha was very, very fond of Douma. He had saved her life and was very kind to her; the two were very close and spent a lot of time together. However, by the time Kotoha discovered that he was truly a demon who was consuming his female followers, she felt betrayed and accused him of being manipulative and a liar. She had again fled with Inosuke, this time running from Douma. And again, she was chased.

While the reason Douma chased after her isn’t really confirmed, I see it as being because he knew she loved him, and he had managed to grow somewhat fond of her. He enjoyed her company, he liked having someone around who loved him. Anyway he chased after her, Kotoha eventually cornering herself on a cliff. It was here that she threw Inosuke into the river in a desperate act in attempt to save him, and Douma killed her. However, it was not a cold-hearted murder. Douma claims to have eaten Kotoha down to her bones, which is very out of character for him. Normally, he consumes human flesh and saves their remains, usually their skulls. (I don't fucking know why he does that.) But Kotoha, he ate every last peice of her. I think it's probably because he had grown to love her without knowing it. Due to his lack of emotion/understand of emotion, I don't think he recognized that he loved her. Anyway, fast forward several years. 16 to be exact, as that's how old Insouke is by now. We're skipping to his last moments; his death. By now, Douma had become Upper Moon Two of the Twelve Kizuki, which basically means he was the third most powerful demon of all time beneath Upper Moon One, and Muzan himself. And yet, he still felt empty, and pointless. He still had no sense of emotion, no close relationships, no sense of self. He reveals this as he dies, after Shinobu's poison had finally destroyed his body and Kanao/Inosuke was able to remove his head. In death, he knows that he has no one who will remember him fondly. He will be known by humans as one of the most powerful demons, and the man who killed the Hashira Shinobu... But that's it. Even after he realizes there is in fact a heaven and hell (and that he's going to hell, which FUCK I think that's unfair, anyway), he knows there's no one waiting for him on either side. On his way to hell, he actually encounters the spirit of Shinobu, whom he in fact killed minutes before. He has a conversation with her, in which she insults him, calls him disgusting, expresses her regret that she wasn't able to deal the last blow to kill him. And he finally, finally feels some sort of emotion. He starts confessing his love for Shinobu, calling her cute and begging her to go to hell with him. She ultimately refuses and literally tells him to go fuck himself, and he goes to hell. But see, I don't think he actually fell for her. I think that was actually a desperate attempt at feeling something in his last moments. After a century-long life of feeling like a waste, of feeling pointless, I think he wanted something to make himself feel as if it wasn't all for nothing. So I think he tricked himself into latching onto Shinobu, since she was close, she was the only one around him. And in the end, he still had nothing. No one who loved him, no one he truly loved. ...That's all for now, PFT, enjoy my way-too-long rant about why I feel for Douma, why he doesn't deserve the hate he gets, why I feel he's extremely misunderstood, and why he's my favorite character.

#douma my beloved #douma #thoughts #my rants #rant post #sorry for rambling #sorry for the rant #demon slayer #kimetsu no yaiba #kny #machigai rambles

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umichenginabroad · 2 months

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Madrid Week 7: Viva Italia (not america..?)

Hola a todxs :). Niko back here again with week 7’s blog of my study abroad experience in Madrid! Like I mentioned in last week’s blog, this last weekend I traveled to Italy, and this past weekend I was in Sevilla, Spain. My trip to Italy was particularly transformative and jam packed with personal reflection. Read on for the reflection, stay for the photos (and Italian food p*rn). This blogpost probably took the longest for me to write, and was honestly pretty difficult for me to put in words. I hope I captured my thoughts well, and I always welcome feedback and discussion to any and all readers (at any point in time!).

Argentina (but aren’t we talking about Italy?)

As I’ve mentioned before, the summer after freshman year, I studied for 6 weeks in Buenos Aires, Argentina. One particular weekend, I took a trip to Iguazu Falls — the largest waterfall in the Americas by volume, and one of the 7 natural wonders of the world.

Long story short, I got onto a tour bus with a bunch of strangers from around the world, drove 15 hours across Argentina to get to the falls, randomly selected hostel room groups based on who was sitting nearby on the bus, and ended up in a group with 4 girls from Mexico, my travel buddy from the USA, and 1 girl from Italy.

We spent a wonderful weekend together seeing the waterfalls (barring a short-lived but intense spout of food poisoning after eating something funky at a Brazilian buffet), and formed the foundation of what could turn into lasting friendships. But, come Monday, we parted ways, not sure whether we would ever see each other again.

This trip was the first time I went into a travel situation without a true support system, and an important exercise in “trusting in the process” — and It helped me realize that I was capable of forming meaningful connections across language barriers, cultures, and in un-traditional social situations.

If it wasn’t obvious already, you might be able to see where this little backstory fits into my recent trip to Northern Italy. Before I departed for Spain in January, I sent a text to Gaia — the Italian friend I met in Iguazu — that I would be in Europe for the semester, and would love to see her at some point if the logistics work out.

Now we actually talk about Italy

Flash forward a few months, and well, the logistics worked out. Although our original plan was to go skiing in a small village in the Alps, we ended up being unable to due to weather issues. Instead, Gaia, her friend Camilla, and I took a tour of Northern Italy, visiting Turine, Asti, Moncalvo, and Milan.

In a way, this trip was an even bigger exercise in trust — although this time, it was my gut I was trusting, not the process. I hadn’t seen Gaia in nearly 2 years, and the only other time we had met lasted just 3 short days. I was about to spend another 3 days with her — but this time, nearly every waking moment would be spent together.

For some reason, the thoughts of “what if we didn’t get along?”, “what if it was awkward?”, “what if we got on each other’s nerves?” — normal things to think in this situation — never crossed my mind. I trusted my gut: that Gaia was someone that I got on with in the past, and I had a feeling that the people we grew into over the past two years would mesh just as well.

So, I didn’t worry. And I was right not to. After a short period of hesitancy, we clicked. We spent the weekend learning about each other — both from a personal and cultural point of view.

And by the end of this trip, I felt culturally enriched. There’s a level of cultural intimacy (is that a term? Well now it is, I just coined it) that can only be experienced by being someone who has lived and breathed that culture for their whole life — something that I feel like I’ve never had the pleasure of experiencing in my own heritage, first or second-hand.

A short aside on heritage in the USA

Ethnically, I am half Italian, half Greek. My great grandparents immigrated to the USA from the south of Italy through Ellis island, raising my grandmother, who gave birth to my mom. 4 generations later, I feel more comfortable calling myself Italian-American than Italian.

My mom’s side of the family was raised in northern New Jersey. I was raised Roman catholic, and I have 11 first cousins. Family gatherings are loud and boisterous, and people talk with their hands. My grandmother makes delicious Italian cookies called Pizzelles, and we call dish towels Mopinas (which isn’t even in the italian dictionary — it must have evolved on its own. Call it Englitalian [Italinglish? Coined.] ).

And that’s about all I’ve got to hold onto of Italian culture. Although I have more contact with Greece through the Orthodox Christian community and my direct-immigrant grandparents, I’ve never felt particularly connected to either culture. I don’t speak either language, and up until this past summer (when I visited Greece), I’d never been to either country.

People from the United States of America — especially, I think, those in the Northeast — place emphasis on their ethnic heritage that those from other countries around the world do not. Ask an American, and they’ll probably know where their blood comes from — if the records of their ancestor’s immigration do exist. Ask an Italian, or a Spaniard, and they probably will not. Odds are, in fact, that their blood will be just that: Italian, or Spanish.

The USA is a country built on immigrants, and it continues to be so to this day — and to me, it somehow feels wrong to not know anything about your cultural background.

This is a weirdly complex topic — one that I’ve thought about a lot —but bear with me here (and keep in mind, this is all from my personal point of view, and I welcome all new perspectives! Feel free to send me a message to discuss🙂). I think that, in the more liberal sphere of American adolescents, it’s almost “bad” to not know anything about your heritage — especially among white people, which is a label that I identify with. The USA has done a lot of messed up stuff in the world, and I think this is true to an extent that young Americans feel a desire to distance themselves from their nationality.

Instead, we grasp on to what we have that sets us apart from it — where our parents, grandparents, or great-grandparents come from. It gives us something to point to in conversations, something that lets us say “see, look, I’m not just a white-washed American, I’m cultured”, something to help us feel like we have more depth — especially in a country where everything feels like it comes from something else.

This is why I mentioned above that this is more common in the Northeast — although I can only truly speak on what I’ve experienced in Northern Virginia and in the University of Michigan. When I think of the term “melting pot”, I think of places like New York City. Southern states, and perhaps those in the West, have developed a culture that feels more unique, more distinctly American, and this is why (from my outside perspective) it seems like something more people feel proud of and claim as their own.

As I mentioned, this perspective comes from personal experience. And this is all something I’ve felt as a white American, at least 2 generations removed from my “mother countries”. After spending a weekend in Italy, I finally got a piece of that contact that I had always craved.

Italo-

Italian culture is just that — uniquely italian. Food, history, architecture, art — not only is it unique, but it is rich. From the first day that I spent with Gaia and Camilla, it was apparent that they felt a deep connection, pride, and understanding of their culture — and this is something that they graciously and enthusiastically shared with me.

I now have a greater — albeit limited — understanding of what it means to be Italian, in Italy. I learned about Italian espresso, when to have it (spoiler alert — any time of day is game), how to prepare it, and how it tastes. Some of my favorite moments of the trip were peacefully spent over the breakfast table in Gaia’s home, enjoying a light carb heavy breakfast and freshly brewed coffee.

We ate simple, delicious food at every restaurant we went to. The food was less extravagant than I expected it to be. Most of the meals were simple, with a focus on the ingredients and their preparation. Pastas, pizza, Milanese, Ragu, more pasta. Tiramisu, and gelato, too.

We had a night out — first to aperitivo, then to dinner, then to a bar that was built in an old desecrated church, then to a cheesy karaoke bar where the whole place was singing old Italian songs at the top of their lungs — with a group of 12 in Gaia’s hometown, which was made up of friends stemming from her high school days. The biggest difference between the Italian dinner party and an American one — we took our time. There was a feeling of ease at the table. Nothing was rushed. We enjoyed each dish, each glass of wine, and over everything, enjoyed each other’s company. The focus was on the people and the conversation, not on what was to be ordered and how fast it came out. I hope to bring this rhythm back to Ann Arbor with me (but that may be more difficult than I think. See footnote 1 below*).

We explored multiple Italian cities, and walked a TON. I learned an interesting perspective of Milan (which was a beautiful city) from Camilla’s boyfriend — Milan is Italy to Europe, and Milan is Europe to Italy. (See footnote 2**). The architecture was beautiful, and after a rainstorm, Milan looked magical. The ground was sparkling, reflecting the dramatically lit buildings of the city center in the puddles that gathered on the ground. I saw the Italian countryside, picturesque rolling hills backdropped by an epic sunlit cumulo-nimbus cloud.

I even learned a base of the Italian language (I probably said “Come si dice” 100 times) that will serve me well if and when I want to learn it in the future — or if I ever get my Italian citizenship and decide to move there. Guess only time will tell.

-americano

3 days is not a long period of time, but I can confidently say now that I understand a little better what it means to be Italian. I feel more connected to my cultural heritage — and in turn, I feel more connected than ever to my native culture in the USA.

It’s true that the USA has done a bunch of messed up stuff in the world. Imperialism, war crimes, political and economical extortion — the list goes on. But the longer I spend in Europe — the more I come into contact with different cultures, and understand foreign perspectives on the USA — the less these things feel like they’re inside a black box. Instead of avoiding these hard truths, I can face them head on — allowing me to acknowledge the bad and the good that comes with US culture.

A big critique I’ve heard abroad is that the United States has no culture of its own — but I don’t think that’s true. The USA is a place where global cultures collide, providing its citizens the opportunity to experience bits and pieces of the world and giving rise to unique elements born from this fusion.

Over the past 2 months, I’ve slowly shifted away from the feeling of shame that comes with being an American in Europe — and that’s thanks to a willingness to learn, adapt to, and accept cultures that I experience while I’m abroad (re: cultural humility, blogpost coming soon). Now, I’ll proudly say that I’m 50% Greek, 50% Italian, and 100% American. With my continuously evolving understanding of my individual parts (and all of the other cultures I come into contact with, especially Spain), I feel like I can better understand and contribute to that fusion, both in the melting pot of the United States, and as an international citizen in Europe — enriching the lives of myself and those I come into contact with.

Such is becoming “cultured” — a concept that has a bit of a pretentious connotation (IMO), but is worth striving for. I’ll be returning to Italy for spring break (Rome, Florence), so hopefully I’ll continue to develop this connection then. I also bookmarked in Google maps here all the places I visited in Italy this trip (and will do so in the next one) if you're considering taking a trip and want recommendations!

I planned on writing about Sevilla this week too, but I think this post has gone on long enough. I thoroughly enjoyed the different vibe it has from Spain, even through the rainy weather we experienced.

As always, check out the image descriptions for more details on each one. I hope everyone has a great rest of their week, and see you back here next soon!

Hasta luego,

Niko Economos

Aerospace Engineering

Universidad Carlos III de Madrid

Madrid, Spain

* In Italy, and the rest of Europe, servers get paid fair wages. In the USA, it’s not required, because it’s expected that servers will make up the difference in tips. I worked as a server for 2 summers, and made $3.50 an hour. The amount of money I made in a night was directly correlated to the number of tables I turned over. As a result, I did my best to get orders in fast, food out faster, and clear the table as quickly as I could so that I could make more money. Until this fact changes, I think it’s hard to have the same no-rush Italian experience over dinner unless you’re really conscious of it. Personally, if I’m not feeling pressure from a server to leave quickly, I’m likely feeling a sense of guilt for staying too long and reducing their nightly wage, no matter how well I tip. Maybe home cooked meals are the answer, which I’ll hopefully be well practiced with next semester :)

**To Europeans, they look at Milan and see what they think of Italy. The world capital of fashion, beautiful architecture, prosperous and well known city. Italians look at Milan and see what they think of as Europe —highly international, intercultural, and as a result more gentrified and expensive. I found this to be really interesting. Is there a US city that fits this bill?

#UmichEnginAbroad #IPEUC3M #NikoEconomos #IPEWinter24 #Spain

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gerardpilled · 2 years

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how's it feel to a be a lesbian on mcr tumblr? I know a lot of trans ppl are fans and have those kinds of connections to their music. is it any different for you?

This is a real interesting question thank you for asking!!!

Hm. okay, so I'm not going to pretend being a white gay person in the mcr community is difficult, but i feel like the best way i could sum up any form of negative i might experience is "isolating"? It's been a journey, I guess. There's also positive.

Positive first: When it comes to their music, honestly i've never really had trouble relating to a perspective Gerard has taken in terms of identity. Gerard has mainly written about relationships with women, but also i never feel like i need to relate to a song 1 to 1 when it comes to singing about love and heartbreak if the song is good. plus i have always enjoyed using music as a means to empathize with different experiences rather than having it describe my own experience perfectly.

When it comes to being online -> as a teen i more or less identified as bisexual but even then i felt like i was missing something when i saw how people talked about the mcr members. I feel like i was just thinking "i'm not like other girls, I don't like mcr because i want to sleep with them". I would receive asks like "who would you rather fuck - gerard or frank" and i remember thinking "wait do people actually want to sleep with them..."

Nowadays it feels a little different. I don't know. It's complicated to explain my emotions towards this. Like, that confusion i feel when people seriously talk about wanting to fuck any of them is still there. But then there's Gerard. [full stop]. I am not saying I view Gerard as a woman or transfem (a label i feel like Gerard should give us before i feel comfortable seriously using it), but recently i've felt more of a connection to him and his identity. Personally, I have always kinda vibed with the idea that 'lesbian' is both a sexuality and a gender. I consider myself attracted to women and whatever fellow lesbians identify as, and have always kinda leaned towards more neutral-presenting people. Gerard is someone i have never met and probably never will meet in any meaningful capacity. To me, when looking at photos he is more or less an outer shell (which sounds insulting and dehumanizing but trust me it's not). I feel like any form of attraction i may feel towards him is with 25 different layers of mental filters and imaginary-versions-that-live-in-my-head. If I was in the room with him and was given the serious option to sleep with him, the answer would probably be no lol. BASICALLY I explained all that to say -> i feel almost like I have to watch what i say when making posts about how I think he looks hot or else i'm going to be accused of 'bad lesbian rep' or misgendering, and, idk. maybe it is breaking some kind of lesbian code. it's such an imaginary scenario that i don't really care.

But yeah, idk if any of that made sense. to be honest i don't really read a whole lot of theory or whatever surrounding the nuances of sexuality. I should also say all of this has been very theoretical LMFAO. I only really started going on dates last year and had my first kiss at 22. Was never really interested in hookups or anything like that. I am in a relationship now, but in general I have just not lived what people might consider the typical lesbian experience.

#long post #lesbianology

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canonicallysoulmates · 2 years

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J2 Main Panel DCCon 2022

The boy's chair spins so Jared starts playing with it and spinning, he's adorable.

Kicking off the questions is: How is the brewery doing? It's still kicking. Jensen says they were able to just keep their heads above water throughout the pandemic which was not easy but they're now doing fine and they just signed a distribution contract so they are growing. x

Since Crowley started feeling human emotions again after the trials and he redeemed himself do they think Jack would allow Crowley into heaven to be friends with the boys? Jensen jokes no, that he’s the King of Hell that's like being the coach for the other team. Jared says "maybe?" Jensen he doesn't think that was in the cards but with SPN anything can happen you never know. He starts to say if and when then changes it to when he and Jared decide to put the boots back on - which btw the boots Jared was wearing during this con panel are Sam's boots that he took from set - he hopes both Mark's are along for the ride. Then Jensen brings up Walker: Independence saying we’ll be seeing Mark be somebody else pretty soon and that Crowley found himself in the old west.For those that may not know Mark Sheppard is going to be in the Walker prequel, Walker: Independence. I find it so sweet that Jensen's the one who brings it up and he turns towards Jared to silently encourage him to talk about it; if we're proud of Jared for this new project I just know Jensen's feeling 10x prouder. x

Have their fans ever done anything really meaningful for them that they remember? Jared says many times, that he read something on twitter once about the money the fandom has raised for charity, and he also mentions the AKF candles from 2015 SDCC says that he still has his on his desk.

Also says that it's just as meaningful to hear from people about how much his work means to them and has impacted them it doesn’t have to be about money raised or candles just about human connection.

Jensen says the most meaningful thing to them is people showing up, and being invested that it's far beyond any material thing they could hope for but at the same time there are some pretty cool materialistic things they’ve been given; for example, Jensen had changed into a Soldier Boy shirt that by the sounds of it was gifted to him by a fan, he also mentions somebody had handmade him an spn blanket which was on the couch in his trailer for almost the whole run of the show that he would nap with; Jared jokes that it would freak him out, that he would tell Jensen "that's us" and Jensen would reply, all snuggled up in the blanket, "I know". Jared, you made it a habit to be there when Jensen took his naps? 👀 (that question is rhetorical I already know the answer to it; before we continue join me for a minute in imagining the two of them snuggled up together under a blanket to take a nap)

Anyways because the husbands were not husbanding enough Jensen acts as if he's snuggling the blanket and says "you're softer than I am for some reason I don't know why". No comment.

He also mentions there was a fan whose father made Christmas light strands out of old shotgun shells, and she gifted them some and he would hang them up in his trailer every holiday season they were filming. But that the greatest gift fans can give them is being there and showing gratification in any way, shape or form. x

If they could write each other a character and a role what would it be and why? Jared answers that as someone who has known Jensen for many years through many points in his life and seen him outside of filming situations he'd like the world to see Jensen play a dad.

Jensen would want to see Jared play a character that's intellectually driven, something like Neo, someone that breaks reality wide open and is kind of a thinking man in an action role. Because he thinks Jared is incredibly analytical and he can turn that aspect of his own personality into a great performance which is something he brought to Sam and did so well, and that's something that elevates the craft that he has, and Jared is really, really smart about how he does things, plays things, and presents things so Jensen would wanna make some sort of smart action figure for him. That's such a sweet, thoughtful answer ❤️

What quote inspires them? Jared's favorite is "pain is mandatory, suffering is optional." Jensen goes with "who let the dogs out?" 😆

In the episode Sympathy for the Devil, Jensen does some gun twirling and gun work how did he do that, how hard was it to learn? And did Jared take any of that or did he already know and took those skills to Walker? Jensen says due to the nature of the show and what their characters did they spend a lot of time handling a variety of weapons so they got pretty comfortable with them. He remembers there was an ep Phil Sgriccia directed and there was a motel scene with expositional dialogue, and it wasn't in the script but Sgriccia came up with the idea that he wanted Dean to be cleaning his and Sam's pistols and the shotgun and he wanted Jensen to do it without looking at them; so when you involve props in any capacity that's another element, another layer to remember because you have to do it the same way each time for continuity. You have to remember what you're doing, when, and how but also remember lines and give the performance so he would spend time in his trailer leading up to shooting that scene taking apart the guns, cleaning them, and putting them back together with his eyes closed.

Says they got exposed to that kind of stuff quite a bit which made them become pretty comfortable, and those skills and confidence is something that has certainly helped him since then; Jared agrees and adds that he grew up handling firearms and knowing fire safety basics so he was already comfortable enough but he believes in knowledge and safety when it comes to something like a firearm so he has spent time with specialist talking about what to do and how to handle it so it's certainly helpful. x

There was a non-question a fan just wanted to give Jensen a unicorn plushie which he named Barks because he went to pick up the plushie there was a doggie in the audience who started barking x

Have they brought their shenanigans into their other sets or has it been more serious? Jared answers that the Walker set is absolutely full of shenanigans, and can I just say that I love how Jensen's response to that is to go "yeah, it's Mitch, it's Keegan, it's you- me showing up to direct didn't help things" not only does it make me smile that months later he's still mentioning and talking about directing Walker so positively like he truly had such a positive and fun time but I also love the tone in which he says it like he knows the cast, and crew, and environment so well that to him it should be obvious that it's full of fun and mischief.

Anyways, Jared continued on to say that part of the reason they have so much fun is that they started filming in Oct 2020, still going through the pandemic everybody was kind of scared but they needed to get back to work so it was a friendly atmosphere but there was also tension and feeling like they were standing on thin ice so a good way to cut that tension was to have fun and remember they're not curing covid, they're trying to entertain people who might be affected by it and the pandemic. So they brought a fun, humorous, friendly atmosphere to Walker.

Jensen says Jared has more of the opportunity to set that tone on Walker because he's the big cheese over there while he has been more of a guest in other people's homes. But when he's given the opportunity to keep it light, and joke and have fun he has seized those opportunities, he has also found the people in the cast most likely to do that and quickly build a rapport with them; says he and Karl Urban quickly build a rapport that left everybody else going "oh, no", and that one time when they were on the bus being driven to set Laz Alonso told them "you're like the good one, and you're the bad one" but he didn't point at them so they had to ask him who was who. Jensen's the good one and Karl's the bad one because Jensen tells Karl the bad things to do 😂

Which is different than with Jared because with Jared he just instantly knew and they would jump into shenanigans together immediately. x

Out of all the performances they've done which has been their most challenging and they were most proud of? Or which of their other castmates performances were they most impressed by?

For Jared he mentions Mark Pellegrino as Lucifer, he thought he was amazing. And, once again, says his favorite version of Sam to play that wasn't Sam was soulless!Sam. But that once he got a grasp on what he was going to do as soulless!Sam it became easier than trials!Sam. Trials!Sam taught him a lot and really spoke to him as a person with what Sam was going through, and that remained challenging to the very end so that was probably the most rewarding on a personal level.

Jensen didn't get to go outside the box as much as Jared did with Sam but his favorite version of Dean that he got to play was scared Dean that it was a lot of fun to play a character that has faced so much and doesn't get scared very often being afraid of everything.

Other castmate that he has been impressed by is Ruth Connell, says anything he was on set with her he turned into an audience member that she's phenomenal and he would watch her do anything. x

What thing that they think might be unattainable do they wish they could do? As an example, the fan would like to swim with a blue whale in the open ocean which is next to impossible due to the marine mammal protection act. If the highest power on the planet told him he wouldn't die or get injured, Jared would base jump in a squirrel suit all the time. After joking around about flying squirrels, Jared says he wants to be flying Jensen and I need y'all to go see how he says it, and their reactions because this was flirting. x

Moving on to Jensen's answer he doesn't have one off the top of his head, says swimming with sharks and swimming with giant animals would be incredible, that flying with a suit and a bushy tail sounds fun 🤣. He thinks anything exhilarating and dangerous is always appealing but when you stop to consider if it's worth the risk it's like 'I don't know'. He always thought he'd wanna go swim with sharks but he's seen those cages collapse. He would probably put on that list traveling around the world like what Ewan McGregor did with his friend Charlie Boorman, getting on some motorcycles and going around the world the way they did that's something that's probably never gonna happen but would really be fun. x

When they leave this world how would they like to be remembered?

Jared wants to be remembered as somebody who cared about people. He doesn't care if anybody knows whether or not he's an actor, he'd like to be remembered not for what you can write down on paper about his life but as a nice guy who cared about people🥺

Jensen answers something similar, he says his grandmother used to say that the things that you do or the things that are done to you sometimes you can or cannot control but you can always control your character and you can control how you present yourself. Being remembered for the things he has done, whether professionally or personally, the milestones he's hit or the accolades, that's great but like Jared, he would wanna be remembered for having a positive influence on people in his life and knowing he's touched people in a way that made the world for the better. x

Between SPN and the shows, they're on now, which is more fun to play the characters in? They got 15yrs on one so they got to have a lot of fun and never got bored on the set. Jensen points out that it's a different experience that they're having right now because Jared's in a similar position on Walker as he was on SPN but he's not he's being a guest so for him he's sitting back and patiently observing what's going on and trying to figure out what he thinks he can bring to the mix that it might be missing while Jared's kind of creating the mix over in his world. But they had so much time on SPN to play and enjoy themselves, they grew up on that show and he doesn't know if they'll ever have the experience they had on it again but the great thing about it is they can always go back to it.

Jared concurs and also mentions he's having a ton of fun on Walker and he loves Cordell who's quirky and has a more available sense of humor than Sam did since Sam was more stoic, and that they're both parts of him. That he also learned a lot, that he jokes that if he had played Cordell Walker when he was 22 it would have been a totally different guy because he hadn't worked so much with Jensen and seen firsthand how to find humor in certain situations and how to while remaining true to the character express to the audience what the character was thinking. He feels it's hard to gage because he committed to Sam when he was 22 and he didn't play Walker till he was 38 and a lot happened; if he started playing Sam tomorrow for the first time ever it would be a more fun experience because he spend a couple episodes or seasons still trying to learn who he was and who he wanted to be so he feels more comfortable as Jared Padalecki and having a certain type of fun with Cordell while as with Sam he was still figuring things out so very different but both incredible. x

Who did Sam end up with? Oh boy, mistakes were made when answering this question.

As Jared tries to think up an answer Jensen asks the crowd if this is a discussed topic and what the general consensus is to which this particular crowd filled proceeds to shout Eileen. Jensen pretends they said that they don’t know but the crowd does not accept that and shouts again Eileen. I will take a second to divert and say that no that answer is not the general consensus those who think that speak for your fucking selves don't drag the rest of us into it.

Jared after realizing he has no other option, reluctantly goes with what the crowd wants. He also says some very nice things about, Shoshannah, the actress that plays her.

Jensen asks if not Ruby, or in this case Ruby's meat suit, to which Jared replies it's got a big hole in it from him (Jensen). It turns into a whole thing and really they should have quit while they were ahead instead of encouraging the crowd but like I said mistakes were made.

And the biggest mistake was Jared asking who Dean would have ended up with because he did not have the necessary information to calculate that some in this particular crowd would shout C's name. Poor Jensen looked like a deer in the headlights, he acknowledged the screams of Lisa but still some in the crowd kept shouting C's name. At which point Jared pretended that he heard someone say Ruby, acted like he was jealous about it and forced things back on track. Boys be smarter next time, don't entertain these things 🙄 x

Moving on: would they rather have finger-sized legs or leg-sized fingers? Much like Jensen, I wonder what kind of question this is but anyways, Jensen doesn't even know how to react to this question and Jared says leg-sized fingers cause you can just have them cut to size. The question came about because this fan was at a con in 2018 where Stephen Amell got asked this so the boys ask her what he said and she's pretty sure he said leg-sized fingers so they joke a bit about that. x

Last question! In their travels have they ever stopped at the towns that are listed in the episodes ie. the towns where the events take place? Jensen has been to Lawrence, Kansas, and Stull Cemetery, as well as someplace else that as much as I tried I couldn't understand what he said but a lot of the towns on the show are small towns so they've been to very few. Jared can't remember if he has or hasn't but says he's dying to go to Lawrence. x

And here's a timestamp to the boys with their arms around each other waving goodbye 💕

J2 Main Panel DCCon

#anti saileen #anti destiel #anti destihellers #j2 tinhat #mine #the panel started okay and then at the end got off the rails and didn't fully recover

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the-cat-and-the-birdie · 10 months

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I vibe with hyperfixating w/ characters. To varying degrees I’ve fixated on: Armin from AOT for a while, 1D had a DEATH GRIP on me for a few years, (SEVEAL book characters through my teen years)I had an Alucard from castlevania fixation for maybe 3 ish years (‘ending’ only recently) and now Hobes lives in my head rent free ngl.

I get the “being sad cuz you can’t meet them” part, I’ve felt it. I try to not daydream TOO much cuz otherwise it takes over my life and I’m doing a considerable effort to live OUT of my own head, but BOI do I LOVE just daydreaming about my blorbos of choice.

I don’t speak too much about it (mostly the daydreaming) cuz to an extent it feels like a “me thing” (like something I don’t wanna share with anyone cuz it’s special to me), but if given the chance I DO info dump on my fixations.

I don’t think it’s cringe, not at all. These things are stuff that helps us process the world and our experiences with it. I believe everyone has sensitive weird shit that they don’t talk about, but if there’s something Ive learned is that we hardly ever have completely unique experiences. Most people just hide their oddness. Fandom being a prime example of how much our blorbos can mean to us. I think it’s okay and normal. (Until it goes overboard and people send idk violent messages to others because they headcanon something differently idk, the unreasonable stuff imo)

Can’t believe our of everything people would dare to make JOY and INTEREST the things with negative connotations. Being mean should be cringe, being a bully should be embarrassing. But unashamedly enjoying stuff?? That’s wonderful.

Anyone too embarrassed of their own vulnerability that they deal with it by making others feel bad about their interests are the most immature out if all of us.

Joy is everything that’s good with the world.

Even just seeing the letter 1D makes me wanna scream (in a good way!!) cause it takes me back to high school lol 1D was a bit older than me so my grade had Mindless Behaviour (does anyone remember them, where they even popular) but I remember the days where 1D was like the definition of summer songs

And I can totally understand the 'me thing'. Like I never really spoke about it but I felt like I knew my daydreams were more substantial or vivid than the 'average person' so to say.

Or when I spoke about characters to other people, I understood that neurotypicals likes characters, but they often didn't see them as fully formed 'persons' in the way I do - as to say, they didn't speculate or see emotional backstory, connections, or their behavior the way I did.

I never really shared any of my daydreams because like - I can't even get into it that's like asking someone to explain Star Wars to someone who doesn't even know space travel exists.

I grew up in a time on the internet where self-inserts and OC were seen as cringe, and someone would be very quick to call out 'Mary-Sue's (or flawless OCs) whenever they could.

It's not like that now - but in juxtaposition to canon x canon shipping, that bias is still there I feel like. Like it, as a work of fandom art has less 'value' that art or fics of canon only characters

It kinda bums me out still.

I think OC and daydreams and self-indulgent inserts are all the best part of fandom because it's the purest way of fans connecting with content on a personal level.

I'm happy that I see more people pushing back on that lately. Like after years of seeing people viciously hate furries when most of them seem like very nice, fun people, it's refreshing for people to be like 'nah, actually this thing is cool. and im gonna spend of time and/or money on this thing cause i makes me happy;

like you remember when the new Star Wars movie trailers came out and that dude reacted to it and he was moved to tears and people made fun of him??

yeah fuck everyone else that dude knows whats up.

Like yes, openly cry to your faves. Fantasize deep meaningful daydreams that help you process your feelings. Draw your OC with them, or learn every single thing their is to know about them.

That's why I wanted to talk about this. Because I've never heard it spoken about before. Maladaptive daydreaming, yes - and that can be harmful. But I hardly ever hear people talk about the basic mundane experience of it - or even how it can enrich our lives and help us emotionally develop of neurodivergent people.

When I think of it that way, it's something that makes me happy. I don't think I'll ever be able to describe it fully, and that's the point. Our stories are private to us, not because theyre embarrassing, but because they're so us that to even describe it would like describing a new world top to bottom

I love it. It's what makes humans humans.

#Thank you for this!!! Reading this is like living on planet Earth for once like yess!!! You get it!!#neurodivergency #neurodivergent #actuallyautistic #actuallyaudhd #actuallyadhd #adhd #autism #audhd #character fixations #hyperfixations #cringe culture

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granulesofsand · 10 months

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I don’t know how to feel about the phrase ‘trauma dumping’. We’ve been in therapy and therapeutic programs for years, and collapsed boundaries was one of the first lessons we were taught.

It’s uncomfortable to have strangers lean on you. I don’t love the lack of consent when people share out of the blue. But if they didn’t, if we didn’t, people would be dead.

Nobody has a responsibility for anyone else’s happiness, but there is a level of compassion I expect that is all too often missing.

We almost died, we’re brought back from the brink, several times in our childhood. We could have told someone. Nobody encouraged disclosure, but plenty enforced silence.

I’ve sat with strangers on the train while they told their life story and I was barely living. I would rather repeat that a thousand times over than have them step onto the tracks instead. Seen that too.

I can respect that not everyone feels the same. It’s not fair to expect a person to prioritize another’s wellbeing over their own. But I see the assumption changing to ‘not my problem’ when maybe it should be.

I’ve had mental health counselors tell me they didn’t want to hear about sh or suicide attempts. There were teachers who told us to look the other way with a pedophile coach.

Sometimes it is your problem. Even people who refuse to see homelessness and disability, who insist that abuse is rare or exaggerated. That’s not okay. Why do they get to turn away from our suffering?

It is an active injustice to gloss over us so they don’t have to be uncomfortable. I don’t want their discomfort to take precedent over our safety.

I don’t understand where the line is, when it’s self-care to create distance versus when there’s a social duty to help. I don’t want to hurt bystanders, but I will die if this continues.

It’s not a distant possibility. We are never more than two missteps from fatality, and we are not alone. I want to scream, but I don’t know if that behavior is allowed.

Is it morally acceptable to fight for my life? How close to the edge do we have to be for us to be considered endangered?

And past that, our whole external life is trauma. Any aspect that we could cast in a positive light must be filtered. Even talking about my internal life is some shade of lie.

I can’t make connections without common ground, I don’t have any common ground without my trauma. We’re learning to watch current media and navigate social settings, but it takes so long to form any meaningful bond. It’s disingenuous without the past seeping in.

Is that normal? We’re still working on friendship without trauma-bonding. We’ve never done that before. All of our friends knew early on. People don’t like us without the context, we are weird. The ones who can already know, the way like knows like.

I don’t know when life will stop being trauma. It seems like it won’t. I’m walking a wall in the dark. I can grasp that I’m being dramatic, but this applies to every part of our life. I don’t want to be alone again.

#trauma #trauma recovery #traumagenic system #osddid #did osdd #dissociative identity disorder #did system

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multiplicity-positivity · 1 year

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hello. ive been pondering things and decided it cant hurt to ask. so in short, i feel like i have some degree of separate parts, however if i feel like ones up its still technically overall "me", i just feel different. they have names, pronouns, etc. that go with them, and for one in particular i had to type in caps or it was genuinely uncomfortable not to, and with one currently up its uncomfortable to talk to people. i dont have any real communication with them other than feelings, but thats also just kinda how my brain works. i think it might just be the way my brain deals with things and likes to sort stuff, but i like discussing stuff so i want to bounce it off someone else. thank you!

Hi there! This definitely sounds like it could be a plural experience. There are systems out there who are made up entirely of copies of the same person, so having separate parts with little distinction between them can still totally be a plural thing!

We think what’s most important is finding language that works best for you. If you feel like the framework of multiplicity/plurality can help you find peace, joy, and understanding in your life, then congrats - you’re plural! Plural enough to be a part of our community and the plural community at large.

Have you spoken internally to your other parts about this? How do they feel about the concept of multiplicity? Do they feel like it might apply to you and what you’re going through? Even if they can just send you general vibes, that may be enough for you to get a feel for what they think!

With any system, communication takes time, effort, and patience. So just because you don’t have excellent communication with these parts yet doesn’t mean that you’re not plural at all. It might just take some time for them to come around, or for y’all to form meaningful connections and understand each other.

Of course, if it turns out you don’t feel plural after all and your parts don’t make up a system, that’s okay too! It’s good and healthy to question and learn more about yourself/selves. Feel free to bounce ideas off us at any time, and good luck with figuring this out! ^^

🌸 Margo and 💚 Ralsei

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folkoreluvr · 1 year

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Return of the dragon | chapter four: it’s a wonderful lie

Thomas Mann was proving to be a real pain in the ass. He was supposed to be a nobody, someone she spoke to once then never remembered but he was intent on sticking around. They had gone on a few dates and he was a nice guy just not for Grace. In truth she found him boring and mildly irritating. He rarely elected to aske her questions due to him being too busy dick riding her father. I fucking hate my dad she thought. She found he lacked passion and adventure and creativity, he was quite content to stay where he was born and live the same life as his dad and never be original. There was nothing inherently wrong with Thomas it was just that she could never even picture herself liking him let alone be her husband, if she would ever want one.

So when he called her on a Wednesday afternoon and said he was taking her to a diner he likes she was intrigued. Fancy restaurant dates were never her thing and she loved American diners. He had rolled up in a red Lamborghini and driven her to a small diner on the outskirts of Manhattan. It had dark blue walls and shiny leather boots. Memorabilia of all decades decorated the walls and in the corner was a mahogany jukebox. Grace was ecstatic, this is what drew her in. she couldnt care less about fancy dinners and expensive gifts, she wanted individuality and she found it far more meaningful if someone learned what she liked and made a charming date she would adore them forever. He led her to a booth In the far right corner and sat across from her. They made small talk about their weeks until their food arrived. When grace was halfway through her burger he cleared his throat and looked at her expectantly. She glanced back confused and put the burger down with a small frown on her face.

"I actually brought you here to talk about something, away from the paparazzi and listeners." Now she was even more confused.

"is everything okay?"

"my dad wants me to marry and expects me to have kids in the near future and well I know yours does too and I was hoping we could work out an arrangemen-"

oh her heart dropped. He didnt actually like her and had no interest in actually forming a connection. why would he Im me.

"Im sorry but no. I have no interest in any of this" she watched his face drop and his hands fall to his lap awkwardly before she put the pieces together. "who is she?"

"what?" got you the look on his face confirmed her suspicions. He didnt look shocked he looked caught and mentally she patted herself on the back for being so smart.

"the girl youre in love with. I take it that if you marry her your cash flow stops because your dad wants you to marry someone higher up, someone like me."

"yes but be honest grace your dad expects the same. Have to marry someone he approves of someone he picked. Were both stuck in this I thought you might help me. We would be married only to the public and our parents but in private we could do as we wished."

"I dont want to marry you or anyone"

"but-"

"look, we could pretend to be together for our families sake and find a way to convince our parents it wouldnt be good for us to marry. Ill get my dad off my back and you can search for a woman in a similar predicament to you, Im sure there are many"

"thank-you Grace really"she smiled at him for a second then sunk her teeth back into her burger

Fuck my life

At dinner that Saturday night Grace told tony about how she and Thomas were now in a relationship and watched him nearly jump for jump for joy, she probably would have felt bad about lying to him if he wasnt such a dick. She had a feeling Pepper already knew however, she didnt exactly seem convinced and was oddly quiet the rest of the night. She had walked grace to the elevator to their pent house and kissed her on the cheek..

"I only want you to be happy" she said quietly and Grace just smiled back and hugged her goodnight.

———

"alright now that the boring shits over I have something to announce" tony stark had said to the team, some looked exited like Sam, others grimaced like Bucky or Nat or simply sat their bracing themselves, like grace was. If her father decided to announce her new relationship status in front of the team and in front of Loki especially she would probably punch him straight in the jaw and hope it breaks. "the avengers team is having their first every pool party. An actual pool party and not a few drunk people swimming in their underwear like its high school again"

"who did that in high school" Steve asked with a confused look on his face forgetting not everyone on the team went to high school in the 1930s

"I did" Grace smirked.

"you were home-schooled?" tony said with a look of confusion.

"and yet I was invited to every teenagers pool party in Manhattan"

"moving on" he mumbled "its an avengers thing for team building but Sylvie is welcome to come she was now officially living in a spare room at the compound" Grace still couldnt get the strange sense of déjà vu out of her brain every time she looked at her.

"could I bring Thomas, he would love this sort of thing" this was her key to selling their relationship she mentioned casually that he swam in high school and loved the pool and did her best to pretend like she hadnt read that in an interview article at 3 am the night before.

"of course you can" she caught Loki rolling her eyes as she smiled at her dad.

"I thought this was for avengers not riff raff" he really was a ginormous prick.

"the stark family always makes exceptions for things like boyfriends" and she paused and looked him up and down "psychopaths apparently too" a satisfied smug grew on her face as she watched Thor hold his brother down to prevent him for leaning across the table with a dagger in hand. She truly loved pissing him off and since he often started most of their fights Grace felt he deserved it. She only wished he would look less attractive glaring at her.

"perhaps,"Steve interjected "we can all use this as a way of working out our grievances with each other and stop trying to kill each other" the last part was said in emphasis as he glared at Grace and Loki, both of which did not seem pleased.

"oh come on its hardly my fault hes got such a rod up his ass."

"nor is it mine that the only person willing to be with her is the most dull man in the universe"

"fuck you Loki"

"Kunta" he mumbled at her in old Norse

"LOKI" Thor bellowed at his brother.

and thats meeting adjourned Thor marched Loki out of the room and grace watched and rolled her eyes until she stormed out too.

———

A loud rummaging awoke Grace from her sleep, it was coming from the bathroom and for a second she debated leaving it and hoping nobody killed her in her sleep. Begrudgingly, she got out of bed and slowly walked towards the bathroom. She opened the door as quietly as she could but to her disappointment it was only Loki. He looked up and saw her in the mirror and glared at her reflection.

"oh goodie youre back" she murmured sarcastically, he rolled his eyes and continued dabbing his arm with a rag. Upon further inspection she saw that he had injured himself which was odd because it was nearly impossible but she only took pleasure in his suffering. He removed the now crimson rag and she saw just how grim his wound looked. “that is disgusting” she cringed and Loki looked impossibly more irritated.

"Im perfectly well stark dont you worry"

"isnt that disappointing. You woke me up and I find out our not even dying"

"its 10am why were you asleep?"

"fuck off I had a late night" he rolled his eyes again and threw the bloody rag in the bathroom bin.

"out with that boring man again stark? You may be you but surely theres someone else who wants to be with you." She walked out of the room and slammed the door shouting "bye asshole I hope you bleed out"

#loki fanfic #fluff #loki #smut #gracielle stark #loki x stark ofc #loki x reader

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theowritesfiction · 6 months

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alright, this looks like a fun list to put together, thanks for tagging me @juniperhillpatient <3

10 characters 10 fandoms 10 (ish) tags!

Katara / ATLA – yeah, gasp, no Azula, I always say I love them both equally, but I’ll go with Katara this time. A lot of the times, I will find the good girl too plain or boring, but that couldn’t be further from the truth with Katara. Katara has too many good character traits for me to list, but she also comes with plenty of flaws, painful childhood trauma and some unresolved anger issues. Put together, it makes for the kind of complex character that I always become deeply attracted to.

Adora / SPOP - again, no Catra, gasp, but I wanted to continue with the good girl vibe, and Adora definitely has a lot of similarities with Katara, good girl with issues. I would say that Adora is a lot more patient than Katara, and it takes a lot more to push her to the breaking point. Also, Adora has the kind of martyr complex that’s not very obvious in Katara.

Dawn Summers / BTVS – okay, I’m cheating a little here, normally I would go with Faith or Buffy here, but @juniperhillpatient already picked Faith, and Buffy is such an obvious choice. And I do love Dawnie because I always stand up for the underdog. Coming into the show the way she did, having all this conflict with established characters, turned many (horrible and wrong) fans against her, but I want to say that every issue she ever had was totally valid. Just thinking about what this kid was put through in S5 is still crazy.

Elizabeth Harmon / The Queen’s Gambit – okay, maybe it’s just me, but watching one of my favorite actresses portray a stunningly beautiful young woman who destroys the patriarchy at the chess board meant everything to me. She also has one of the worst, if not THE worst childhoods on this list, and even the foster family that took her in treated her so coldly. Raised with no love in her life, Beth struggles with empathy and finds it very hard to form relationships.

Aeryn Sun / Farscape – for the crime of conceiving a child out of love, her mother was given the choice to kill her lover or her child. She killed Aeryn’s father so that the child could live. Aeryn was then brought up by the state, in a heavily militarized society, pretty much bred for war. Over the course of the show, Aeryn slowly and reluctantly learns the value of forming genuine emotional connections and experiencing all these ‘weak’ feelings.

Susan Ivanova / Babylon 5 – first openly (or at least very heavily implied) lesbian – or bi – character that I came across in any TV show. Her romance with Talia is deeply tragic and captivating. Susan is an unflinchingly loyal and courageous character, but I also remember really appreciating her snarky sense of humor (as well as her stunning looks, ofc)

Angua von Uberwald / Discworld – I had to include Angua because her character concept is just so fascinating. The City Watch books are my favorite in the series, and while I love all the characters of the Watch, Angua is a personal favorite. It’s always fun to watch her balancing her werewolf nature with the demands of her job and just fitting into human society and having meaningful relationships. She also has very tense relationship with her family who are way more into traditional werewolf lifestyle of hunting humans for sport.

Shadowheart / Baldur’s Gate 3 – it wasn’t easy to decide between the BG3 ladies, but it had to be Jenevelle. It’s so hard to summarize her, because you have to first establish which Shadowheart you’re talking about. Taken as a young child, Shadowheart had her memories erased by the worshippers of Shar, twisting her into a disciple of their cruel deity. This is why when you begin traveling with Shadowheart, she will usually respond well or at least won’t denounce evil and cruel choices, but even then, you can see occasional glimpses of another, gentler personality underneath, one that someone has tried very hard to erase. Helping her denounce Shar, allowing her to reclaim her memories and find redemption is maybe the most rewarding experience I’ve had in any video game. She’s also beautifully voiced and has an amazing sense of humor, even if she doesn’t verbally obliterate people the way Minthara does.

Audrey Horne / Twin Peaks – I guess Audrey would be the femme fatale of this list. She’s the spoiled brat with the rich daddy, used to get whatever she wants. She’s pretty manipulative and enjoys toying with people. Audrey’s big flaw is that she thinks she’s more mature and cleverer than she actually is, so she occasionally will get herself into a lot of trouble by not thinking things through. She is a really fun character, though, especially when she’s at her spoiled worst at the start of the show.

Rachel Amber / Life is Strange – I wanted to put Rachel after a character from Twin Peaks, because Rachel is so obviously inspired by… no, not by Audrey, but by Laura Palmer. Both of them have this outward glamor girl appearance, but underneath it, there’s a dangerous fascination with the ugly and filthy aspects of human experience. Rachel is also taught by many to be extremely manipulative (which I don’t necessarily agree with). It’s true that Rachel needs attention as much as she needs air. In many ways, Rachel is like a social chameleon. She just effortlessly makes people see in her whatever it is they want to see.

Anyway, I’ve rambled way too long already, have a great day and I’m sorry if you read through all that!

#tag games #I probably forgot someone important #oh well

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missnight0wl · 1 year

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Heyo, hope you're well! Since the recent posts have talked about the adult models, I feel it would be kind of fitting to talk about career options after Year 7.

Since Year 1, we have always had to choose among three options, and it looks like we'll have to choose among three styles of furniture and three locations for our flat (they may or may not be connected, but that's a separate issue): this leads me to believe that our career options will ultimately be narrowed down to three.

I personally believe our final choices will be Auror, Healer or Curse-Breaker, which I think represent each of the Attributes in that order.

Thoughts?

Hello! I hope you’re well, too!

Hm, your proposition sounds interesting. And it does make sense! However… I feel like it might be too much work for Jam City, to be honest.

See, while you absolutely have a point with the three options concept, I have to point out that usually, it’s basically a cosmetic thing. Let’s take a look at our Animagus form. Sure, an eagle might have different animations than a dog and a cat (which are also not exactly the same, I believe), but overall, all of the forms are used the same in the same situations. The flats we’re getting have the same floorplan. When we choose our companions, the differences are relatively small and it’s mostly about dialogues. Even if you look at dates, they’re not that different, no matter who you choose to date (the exception here are mini side quests you get before deciding about exclusive dating).

To be fair, it wasn’t always that way. JC used to be a little less lazy about it. For example, we had House exclusive side quests. Very simple but totally unique for each House. Another great example is the “Egg Hunt” SQ. I believe you don’t play the game since the very beginning, so you might not know about this one. But, without spoiling anything, there is a part where MC and Charlie have to earn some money, so you get three options: to help Rosmerta, to help Bilton, or to help Tulip. And all of these routes are totally unique. Well, maybe not totally because the end goal is the same, after all. However, I’m pretty sure that if you removed the scene where MC chooses one of the options, you could put all three routes one after another – and it wouldn’t be odd at all. It was really cool because it felt like everyone actually played a little different side quest. But sadly, I don’t even remember when was the last time JC put this much effort into… anything, really.

Now, my point here is that having three separate careers feels quite complicated to execute. Sure, we can have some parts that could serve as a “template”. For instance, an Auror interrogates a witness while a Healer takes care of a patient while a Curse-Breaker talks with someone about the cursed artefact. On top of that, we probably already have all the necessary locations. But in general, I think that these careers would require a more individual approach. And again, it means work and time.

I guess it’d be a bit easier to execute if the careers were made the same way as the classes, meaning that they’re kind of separated from the main story. But then again, shouldn’t a career be a rather big part of MC’s adult life? I don’t know… Admittedly, it’s hard to make any predictions since we don’t even know what JC might be planning as the plot of Y8, but I imagine that the career would be almost like a force putting everything into motion. Or at least that a lot of things will happen around our job. And of course, you can come up with a plot that will fit all three careers in a meaningful way. But I think it’s simply harder, and JC doesn’t like to make things harder for themselves, usually.

Another issue: what about other careers? We’ve been hearing about MC being good with creatures since forever, and I’m pretty sure that more than one person suggested that they’d be a good Magizoologist. It’s a quite prominent theme in the game, so it’d be weird to abandon it now. In fact, during the O.W.L.s TLSQ, we could express interest in many careers. What about becoming a teacher? I know it’s basically impossible to please everyone, but still, I think it’s worth pointing out.

Personally, I suspect that the most likely scenario is that we’ll be forced into one career… kind of. Here’s what I’m thinking:

MC will be hired by the Ministry because that’s probably where we spent the most time, Moody mentors us for years now and whatnot. It’s also possible that we’re gonna save the Ministry from R. However, MC will be hired as a Curse-Breaker. It won’t matter much anyway because they’ll still help Aurors, at the Department of Magical Creatures and wherever any help is needed. They’ll occasionally stop at St Mungo’s to save the day, too. In other words… they’ll basically keep doing what they’re doing right now.

I know it doesn’t sound super exciting or ideal. But to be completely honest, I feel like it might be the best compromise for everyone. Nobody will get their dream job, but most people will get some part of it at some point. JC, on the other hand, will have an easy job creating a linear story.

So, here are my thoughts at this point. To be clear, I don’t think your idea is bad. In fact, I quite like it. However, I’m also trying to look at it a bit from JC’s perspective, I guess.

By the way, my belief that we’re probably gonna get a very linear story is actually one of the reasons why I’m not enthusiastic about Y8 in general. This game always had its limitations and it rarely ends well when JC tries to push them, so I just honestly think it’d be better if it was left to our imagination.

#hogwarts mystery #hphm #hphm datamine #year 8 #jam city #ask #wannabeeliana

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