#idk i can kinda see her in dumbass but not as much as her husband and the nosey cops | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

weirdcat1213 · 9 months

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fuck

here we go

vol 10 thoughts

chap 1:

-IMIMIMIM NOT READY FOR THISSSS

-nooo dont make me read it, im too broken already

-NOOOO SHUT UPPPPPP

-delusion oh dear geesus

-DONT ASK THAT WHY WOULD ASK THAT :C

-stfu wolfwood please, ik you love him and admire him but stfu pls

-huh

-oh right....this is how...yeap

-please leave wolfwood just fucking leave

-although yeah thats interesting, im not sure if he thought vash or someone would come for him but yeah, if he actually thought that was the end he would have taken the vials...hmmm

-or maybe not. maybe he was ready to defend the orphanage and be done with it

-ouch

chap 2:

-HE TOOK NO DISCIPLE THAT WAS KIDNAPPING BASICALLY FUCK YOU

-livio ill say this with love....rn i do not fucking care about your self worth/attachment issues. he can go to hell, he and his stupid fucking gun

-OH NO THE CHILDREN

-LMAO HER PLAN WAS GOOD AND THE CHILDREN WERE LIKE "YEAH NO"

-go to FUCKING HELL CHAPEL SHUT UUUUP

-SHUT UP YOU KNOW HES SENSITIVE ABOUT THAAAAAT

-FUCKER

-well this is fucked this is so fucked (may i remind the people this is my 2nd reading)

-ah yey, the tears are here

-"we could have done this as a team" then WHY DID YOU LEAVE YOU FUCKING DUMBASS. NOW YOURE IN THIS FUCKING PAINFUL AND STUPID POSITION. YOU KNOW WHATS SHES FUCKING RIGHT, YOU NEVER LISTENED TO HER NOR VASH AND WENT TO DO SHIT ON YOUR OWN, AND NOW YOURE HERE. YOU AND YOUR FUCKING NEED OF DOING EVERYTHING ALONE CUZ THATS WHAT YOU HAVE BEEN DOING FOR YEARS. YOU CARRIED YOUR LONELINESS FOR YEARS, BUT YOU ARE ABOUT TO REALIZE YOU WERE NEVER ALONE, BUT ITS TOO LATE NOW ISNT IT??? YOU PRECIOUS STUPID DUMBASSS

-this is literally where the fun ends (kinda)

-OH THANK GOD YOURE FUCKING HERE FINALLY

-oh this is when i start to cry like a baby oh geesus

chap 3:

-WHY DO YOU THINK HE CAME YOU DUMBASSSSSSSSSSSSS (ily)

-wolfwood i fucking swear-

-razlo can you not, youre scaring the children, the readers and me

-also the ultimate pacifist vs the ultimate "what if i make a hole in your head for funsies"

-silly me thought the 1st time"oh vash is here so literally nothing can happen"....ja

-yeap, theres also that

-if the book club survives this i would love to buy everyone virtual drinks actually. the people who dont drink can have a nice lemonade

-SPIN THAT FUCKER WOLFWOOD :D

-NOT THEM NOT TRUSTING HIS ANGEL ARM PLSSSS

-"im a friend of nicholas" i may throw up out of sadness

-oh thats cruel for you? really?

-good fucking riddance old man

-razlo stop i dont want to sympathize with you rn

-VASH QUICK DO SOMETHING-

-THE ULTIMATE FIGHTING COUPLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

-"they switched to fighting as a team" im gonna eat glass

-i love how this chapter ends. thanks for the goofy moment before you pluck my heart out in front of my eyes, nightow

-also if you dont see how thats the face of someone trying to confess something really important but failing idk what to tell you

chap 4:

-"death omen" SHUT UP NIGHTOW

-YOU FUCKING DUMBASS

-AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH :c

-[side note but if orange animates this is gonna hurt like HELL cuz they have highlighted a lot wolfwood's thing with survival so...yeah]

-STOP MAKING YOUR HUSBAND SAAAAAAAAD

-oh...oh no

-HE SAID THE THING HE SAID THE THING NOW SHUT IT

-THE FUCKING. FUCKING. TOUCH

-OW

-those fucking eyes damn hes pissed

-OW RIGHT, HIS NOSE...AH

-oh..oh honey no pls dont leave pls dont leave him alone ik you understand whats gonna happen but please dont please come back-

-oh that blank panel, oh geesus

-YA BRATTTTT

-FUCK OFF RAZLO AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH

chap 5:

-i dont get much about this fight ngl

-razlo's eye is so cool but also FUCK OFFFFFFF

-FASTEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEER

-OHOHOHOH YEAH LETS GO LETS HIT IT

-DAMN

-PUNCH IN THE FACE BITCH

chap 6:

-not the...not the fucking parallel with vash and razlo....nightow why

-HAHGSYU NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO THE BLOOD

-wait what-

-VASH TO THE RESCUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

-nononononononNONONONONO NO

-right right, i fell for it again

-THATS IT WE WIN- AH NO SHIT FUCK

-i told you he was a cunt razlo

-oh shit thats, thats beautiful

-i dont mean this as a negative thing against nightow/the story...BUT DID LIVIO'S FUCKING IDEA HAD TO BE THIS FUCKING LATE????? YOU ARE FUCKING WITH ME

-yey...hes back

chap 7

-for the love of geesus pls dont make me read this

-this is more from a personal standpoint but it makes me so fucking sad he felt guilty at the idea of going back to the orphanage cuz no matter what that was always his home, a place he could have come back to. not everyone has one of those. but alas, now its too late

-.....no. he doesnt care that you are a killer or that you have one of the coins, that you were gonna betray him anytime. he doesnt care wolfwood so fucking stop trying to be the villain here.

-ik fucking know why wolfwood doesnt wanna go....but fucking damn it

-this chapter is so quiet. the 1st time i was listening to mr bluesky but the chapter's lack of music just fits.

-maybe YOU are alright but im not. ill never be alright with this

-when i get my own place im not buying a couch and thats a promise

-"smile needle noggin" [crying pause]

-IF I DONT TURN THE PAGE I DONT HAVE TO SEE IT IF I DONT TURN THE PAGE I DONT HAVE TO SEE IT IF I DONT TURN THE PAGE I DONT HAVE TO SEE IT IF I DONT TURN THE PAGE I DONT HAVE TO SEE IT IF I DONT TURN THE PAGE I DONT HAVE TO SEE IT

-god literally has never made vash any favors ever and the ONE TIME he needed someone bigger than everything else...nothing happened

-"and we can celebrate" WHY DID NIGHTOW PAINTED HIS FUCKING DEATH LIKE A CELEBRATION??? YES, HE GETS HIS FREEDOM BACK, HE GETS TO GO HOME, TO SEE HIS FAMILY, TO SHARE A DRINK WITH HIS SOULMATE BUT I CANT STAND IT I CANT

-ofc you did, wolfwood has never been good at lying

-and there it is, til death do them part as they say idk

-...............................................................................................................

chap 8

-im gonna eat my hand, glass, my computer, my house, the world-

-so...do we think that grave was just laying around or...

-DONT YOU FUCKING ASK THAT (IKIKIKIK BUT STILL, LIKE LOOK AT VASH'S EYES HE GETS IT)

-CALL ME STUPID BUT I GENUIENLY FORGOT ABOUT THE HAIR

-literally "stay away from him asshole"

-imagine knowing for a fact you broke something really important inside your brother and laughing about it

-baby oh my baby your hair, your little and stupid blond hair

-orange you have hinted at this so many times and let me tell you one thing, if you do it it has to hurt in the best way possible because this scene deserves nothing but the best

-i respect and wonder how nightow is so good at comic relief. its still a sad scene, everything fucking hurts, the reader will never be the same again...but he can put bits and pieces of comedy that make you chuckle or at least smile to then continue to hit you with a bat

-NOT THE JESUS ALLEGORY CARRYING A FUCKING CROSS, go to hell nightow

-and thats his cross?....to survive?????? im dead

-oh so he doesnt take it? ngl after this my first reading turned into a blur, god knows what i was thinking

im..........yeah. i fucking hated that, as i thought i would

#trigunbookclub #trimax #trigun maximum #literally no one gets to leave after trimax im sorry

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wench-and-jezebel · 1 year

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The Musketeers Reaction: The Challenge

Jezebel (@typicalopposite) reacts [with occasional asides by Wench (@scripted-downfall)]

Now with BONUS: meta analysis :) (But Wench might post that separately later too... she hasn't decided)

[Oh, no, a prisoner transfer! That always goes badly; just ask CTU (from 24)]

Well shit

Well…. SHIT THIS MAN A BEAST [Yup!]

“Stay out of this, damn you” Let us get our asses kicked by one man.. on our own [Red Guards be prideful dumbasses]

Wot? WOT?! WHAT!?! [Tenth Doctor-coded, you are] ☠️☠️☠️ [But also, agreed. They explicitly warned the Red Guard. And then tried to help. Not their fault the RG didn't listen 💀] Right!?!

No one asked you, man child

WHAT, ARE THEY ALL CHILDREN??? [Yes]

OOOP- awwwwww [Dangerous for him and Constance to do that in broad daylight tho]

Well their relationship has escalated

[OH, LOOK, HER HUSBAND; WHAT. DID I SAY.] ☠️☠️☠️☠️ [Awkward, that is.]

Blech

Sweet lord [Indeed]

Do they not get paid? [Kinda but also... money got spent… It's not much, I don't think]

[They're Tinder-ing in church ☠️] Im dying [Porthos swiped right on the widow alkdsfj] Trying to say something and these two are distracting me [I adore them] Ok, so anyway… I’m guessing D’art does it, wins, and then becomes a Musketeer

Poor d’Art

Y’all two really trying to swindle money from grieving women… MEN [Only one was grieving. The other was having an affair, since those are highly common] ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️

Imma. Oooop… Second-hand embarrassment [She's covering for him :)] ☠️☠️☠️

☠️☠️☠️ Oooop she ain’t grieving too hard [I'm sorry, but they're kinda cute] They are

“You’re cute”

☠️☠️☠️ Aramis is gonna get the money and Porthos is gonna get a wife [adslkfjlksadjf]

Candle sniffer? Is that a person? ☠️☠️☠️ [Candle snuffer, dear] I know 😂

["Too often, you let your emotions get the better of you" "Can we just get on with it" Sir, that. Proves the point] ☠️☠️☠️

Oooop, I see what you’re doing, Athos

Blech

[I love Peter Capaldi]

Oooop. That might not go well

[Love lines like "I can see you are a man of quick intelligence"... they’re always passive-aggressive digs]

How did he not see him? Or hear that? They are quite incompetent

[OH SHIT I REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENS AFTER THIS]

Oooooop

“You killed my father” [he’s making a habit of this] “I mean, burned down my farm. Prepare to die”

Well damn [This has gone badly for young d'Artagnan] d’Art, how do you really think this is gonna play out

[Of course Athos had to save him ☠️] ☠️☠️

Awwww [They turned it in a different direction, but I usually detest "I'm not like *you*" statements]

“Get some rest!” How about dry off?

Bruh where did the rain go?

Bitch (Milady), why ain’t you ded?

[This is what I meant by “I remember what happens after this” btw] Let me breathe on your mouth for a moment [Shut up]

“Leave me alone, Athos” Ma’am you came to him??? Womennnn

“I thought you had brains, but clearly not.” Athos, what has he done for you to think that? [alskdfjlsakdjf This is a valid question]

– – –

Jezebel: Welp! First off the level of ack I feel about friends having to fight each other in a competition is like…. Skyrocketing. Idk if it’s gonna be as awkward (they each think they will win, disappointment if they don’t) but I feel awkward about it lol!

Wench: You underestimate their loyalty, dear… I'm reasonably — like 90% — confident that they're only, like, half-competing. Because this is the current main way they know to get d'Art his commission and he's running out of time. And these three are, it's heavily implied, the best of the regiment so it’s kinda foolish to send a new recruit unless it’s more about getting him the commission.

Jezebel: Ohhhh they letting him win?

Wench: I suspect they've already gone to Treville and been like. “Don't consider us for the tournament.” I don't know for sure, but that's always been my interpretation. Also, it's less "letting him win" and more "nudging him in the right direction and giving him sway with Treville." Buddy's from Gascony and got that hot-headed pride thing going; he wouldn't accept their charity any more than he'd accept their money

Jezebel: Ohhhhhh! I see!! I love them! 🙂

Wench: At least Athos, since he's heavily training d'Art to compete. I'm less sure about Flort because they seem to kinda need the money 💀

Jezebel: ☠️☠️☠️☠️ Gonna be another: (Athos) “We weren't gonna try to win” -> (Porthos) “Weren't we?” -> (Aramis) “Next time let us know” things

Wench: aslkdjflkadsjf Exactly!!!

Jezebel: It feels like as of rn they have put Milady in the ep…. Just so she’s in the ep ☠️ Not that I’m complaining she’s aight but she just seems random

Wench: You ain't seen shit yet. Also, in case you missed this, they're Heavily paralleling Athos and d'Artagnan in this ep. Her being there is definitely intentional.

Jezebel: Yes! I have 😂 Athos even said it ☠️

Wench: Ma'am. He said one overt "you're more like me than you know"; that is not paralleling ☠️ And, if it were, it’s not the extent of the paralleling either

Jezebel: Aight lay me out the parallels 😂😂

Wench: I'll tell you in endpoint; it's easier to avoid mincing my words

Jezebel: Speaking of tho! I LOVE ATHOS TRAINING DART SM OMG!!! And Flort are just fucking chaos. ☠️☠️ I love them! Porthos trying to talk to the widow tho was fucking adorable

Wench: I adore them all

Jezebel: Ready?

Wench: Yup!

– – –

Ooooop

Ma’am!

She is so pretty tho 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨

Oooooop! Oooooooooooooop!!

No, she didn’t

Oh nooooo ["Who else is just going to walk up and hand me 30 livres" Well, ya see-] THIS IS WHY YOU ARE DUMB [Constance was]

PORTHOS!

OOOOP she’s giving him that look

[never trust "it doesn't matter"s]

HE BRUSHED HER HAIR BACK WITH HIS PINKY!? THAT WAS ADORABLE

Ooooop!

[I kinda adore them; sorry to your Portamis plotting ☠️ ] (Porthos) “What was I supposed to be getting again?” (Aramis) “….. NOT THAT”

[Shocker, the marksman won the shooting competition alksdfj] Aramis and that damn hat ☠️☠️☠️ [Oh, and the close-combat dude won the close-combat skirmish; who knew? :)] OH THIS GIF SET!

Athos watching all proud [*simultaneously* Also, in point of fact, I'm not actually sure Athos is competing at all]

Angry face

HE DIDNT FLINCH

“No control….” Buddy. You knew this. Ahead of time. Why are you acting like it's new???

I see what you’re doing… Le gasp! CARDINAL YOU ARE INSANE!

PORTHOS!

Dawwwww

Ma’am! SO ARE YOU

Okay, not the last one. But two out of three isn’t bad!

[Whoops]

Ma’am… It- Y’all- Sir. THEY ARE SO PERFECT FOR EACH OTHER [Because they're so dumb? :)] Yes

OOOP

He gone beat the hell out of herrrrr… Those things were allowed back then

Oooop

OOOOP

[Protective!Athos unlocked asldkfj] Ooooop!

Treville knows he’s letting the guy fight huh? [Not saying :)]

POOR DART! [Poor Constance] I KNOW

💔💔💔💔 The break in his voice when he said I want you

POOOR CONSTANCE

“Her name’s Alice” Oooop- [Callback to your earlier “Aramis is gonna get the money and Porthos is gonna get a wife” !!!] Jealous Aramis

The Musketeers are like WOT

[Bruh. Swordsman??? It's a. Sword contest. I know Athos didn't seem to be competing in the initial bracket. But also. If the point is to win. ???]

They look like guard dogs ready to attack

[Once again, a very Doctor Who score… (Again, same dude, but it especially shows here)] lol!

There goes the hat

[Also, gotta love Athos getting ready to throw hands the second Treville's arm got injured alksdjf] Yes!!! [Man was taking off his cloak in 0 time]

Welp ok. King making up for all the childish behavior

[d'Artagnan needed to have his heart broken to not let it sway his actions ☠️] 💔💔💔💔

Ooooop! He’s doing the thing! The thing Athos did! [:))))]

Whoooop whooooop! [I must say. It's. It's kinda biased. To have the King. Judging an assessment. Involving the King's Musketeers] ☠️☠️☠️☠️

Oooooo! Whoooop whoooop!

[Adore the fact that Athos gets to give it to him]

Ooooop! She’s been had! [Why is she surprised that the scheming, manipulating, control-freak Cardinal was being a scheming, manipulating, control-freak??] ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️ [Also, I'm sorry, but the Athos/Milady storyline is something that is so delectably twisted I can't even... I'll explain some in endpoint] ☠️☠️☠️☠️

“d’Art is the key” ‘Cause he’s dumb

Sighhhh, womennnn

💔💔💔💔💔

Ack! DON’T DO IT

HE DONE IT

HE DIDN’T DO IT

OOOOP! She’s confused!

– – –

Jezebel: Basic summary: Poor d’Art! But also YAY D’ART! But then poor Constance. No really 💔💔💔💔 POOR CONSTANCE. But Miladys face when he didn’t get in the carriage? stunned 😀

Wench: Indeed

Jezebel: Also I didn’t absolutely hate the king this episode. He seemed competent ☠️☠️ I retract my earlier statements about him 😂😂

Wench: Ma'am. He was still being the same childish king he's always been; he just happened to be childish in favor of the protagonists.

Jezebel: ☠️☠️☠️ ok fair

Wench: He just threw a competition as a way of proving that his men were better than the Cardinal's, and then he rigged that competition, and then he took the prize money on top of that laksdjf

Jezebel: This… is also true 😂😂 Anyway 😂 ummmmm… oh yeah! Porthossss 💔💔 he was so soft and non-tough-guy with Alice it was adorable. And the “Who’ll look after you?” to Aramis???? 💕💕 (When she leaves)

Wench: Yeah :)

Jezebel: And Papa Treville! And how they all was like yeah fuck the competition soon as he got hurt! I love it! And I did mention up there the look on Milady’s face when the lil dummy she was so sure she could seduce didn’t take the bait ☠️☠️ Now that may change I guess! But that was satisfying that he wasn’t like “well, bye, Constance; hello, Milady!”

Wench: This is true, and it's nice that he's not fickle... Fits in with his character, though, for the most part, so I'm not horribly shocked

Jezebel: Athos tho! I loved him this whole episode! And his little "get down there before he changes his mind" (with a smirk)

Wench: Yesssss

Jezebel: Uhhhhh… the only thing I can say about Athos and Milady’s scene together was already said in the react, but how she was all “lemme stalk you” and then all “HMPH stop stalking me”... Like!?!?

Wench: You still don’t see the parallels?

Jezebel: Nope ☠️☠️ Just tell me

Wench: *sigh* Okay

Jezebel: 🙂

Wench: For reference, btw, we only have two more s1 episodes left. Now, first, some contextual parallels: Have you noticed the running theme of scarring/binding/tying in Athos' and Milady's backstories?

Jezebel: Um. I- no? Maybe? You say that and all I think is her being hanged but I can’t remember where else it is happening or do you mean figuratively

Wench: Yes and no. That’s the obvious example. She was hanged. She still "bears the token of [his] love" in the scar that remains. She covers it up with a fine necklace --- a choker --- to obscure her past. But less obviously... He still wears her locket. She says that he gave her a necklace, and he still wears the chain that represents her around his neck. Half the time he's drinking, his head is literally bowed by it. Also, in his intro, the locket is the first real thing we see of his character. He's hungover and drinking first, yes, but the second he gets his bearing/sits up, he pulls out the locket. And that's before he even gets dressed/does his wake-up ritual. Within that locket is a pressed forget-me-not (or an icon of the flower, but the point remains... a forget-me-not). Additionally, the first time we see her, she's manipulating things so that he gets imprisoned --- weaponizing justice the same way she feels was done against her --- and quite literally manacled in the process. Et cetera, et cetera.

Jezebel: Ok, so see! This is what I mean by I may see a parallel but would never see it that deep! I would see he wears her locket with a forget me not inside and be like ohhhhh he is like tormenting himself. And this I would not think about it again. I would have never caught the choker being symbolic just that she needed something that fit to her neck… or she couldn’t hide the scar

Wench: And that's shown in their interactions too… In "Commodities," for example, when they both are back at Pinon: after she’s knocked him to the ground, she literally pulls him up to meet the dagger by the locket chain.

Still Wench: And yet it’s also why she can’t go through with killing him; she's so distracted by it that she takes too long and d'Artagnan shows up.

Jezebel: ☹️☹️☹️☹️ see now I caught that that threw her off ☠️☠️ I’m not fully unaware! 😂

Wench: Not surprised by this, but the scene still means more in context of the larger symbolism. Then you've got the episode we just watched, where you have the alley scene, in which she literally tugs him closer via the chain.

Once again back to Wench: But even beyond the literal symbolism that's emphasized overtly on screen, it's their literal storyline… They're each orbiting the other, unable to let go completely but unable to forgive and forget and move on either. Tied together by their mutual scarring --- whether literal or metaphorical --- and the literal ties that bind.

Jezebel: ☹️☹️☹️☹️ that is so sad and makes so much sense once pointed out omg

Wench: So. Why have I spent so long yapping about this? Because all of this context boils down to Milady deciding to sponsor d'Art. And what does she do for him? She gives him money, BUT. Attached to that money. Is nothing less than:

Still Wench: A necklace. More than that, a forget-me-not pendant on a chain.

Jezebel: I meant to mention that more! I think I was like oooop or something but at first I thought it was THE locket! Like i thought she’d got it off Athos

Wench: It's not, but what it is is a cheaper-quality pendant. It's not a locket; it's just an oval with a carving. It's stark and cold, harsh and engraved. Molded. Like, one might say, a woman who's been through shit and decided to embrace the role of criminal she feels shoved into. Athos', meanwhile, is a locket. It's got the actual flower, soft and natural and encapsulated in time. A happy memory encased in pendant form. But it's also not intact. It's old and withered and slightly tarnished: the necklace equivalent of that warm and happy glow they always use for the Athos/Milady flashbacks.

Jezebel: I am sitting here reading this like…. Bruh, these are blink and you’ll miss them moments and here she is just pulling full detailed parallels out of her ass…. But they make sense and make the characters so much deeper and sadder… ack

Wench: I'm boutta add a bit more, whoops :) Because this shows up in the context of Milady offering to sponsor d'Artagnan, right? She's offering him money. But the chain comes with the money. Her influence comes with the money. They have to go together, or they don't go at all. If he takes that money, he becomes even more indebted to her than he already was. And he does take it. And he takes the necklace (her "care," her influence, his debt to her) too. AND… this is what gets him and Constance in trouble. It's Bonacieux seeing d'Art and Milady together and discovering that necklace that prompts him to follow d'Art. It's Milady's meddling influence that keeps screwing things up for them. BUT it’s not all bad because, when the necklace goes missing and Constance asks about it, he dismisses it --- her influence, his debt to her --- as unimportant. He lets it go. She does it again --- not with a necklace, but still --- at the end: she offers him a ride in her carriage, and it’s just a simple offer, but with strings --- literally --- attached

Jezebel: (I was waiting cause it seemed you were gonna add more to that! Since he declines the offer)

Wench: Oh, no. Nothing immediately attached. But I will say... The more I (re)watch, the more I realize that she's got a lot of the archetypes of the devil figure. (That's the character who offers a temptation but gets control of you in return)

Jezebel: Oooooo! 👀 I can see that

Wench: She consistently offers things to people --- love to Athos, power to the Cardinal, a hodgepodge of things for d'Art --- but it's not as easy as it seems. With the sole exception of the Cardinal (because he's an unstable force that she can't fully manipulate), she gets nearly interminable power over the people who take her up on it

Still Wench: Anyway, that's the main but extensive parallel between Athos and d'Artagnan in this episode. Athos outright says, "you're more like me than you know" (paraphrased), and they show it, bit by bit, with this running symbolism. They're alike, but not the same. They have similar necklaces --- similar ties to Milady --- but not identical ones. d'Art hasn't and never will have the same opportunity to be influenced by her as Athos did --- he first met her when she framed him for murder, so he's not quite as inclined to trust her as Athos (who met her when she was either not the same person or pretending to not be the same person, depending on your interpretation) --- but he's nonetheless swayed by her. Similar, but not the same. See?

Jezebel: Yes! I do! 😂 though I never would have before! So thank you 😂😂😂

Wench: :) np! Any overall responses though? ☠️ I kinda took over

Jezebel: More of a question… Am I just seeing her look confused he didn’t get in the cart, or is that gonna play into this little “she can sway Dart to come to the Cardinal men” thing she had because she doesn’t have the hold over him she thinks?

Wench: Wot

Jezebel:

Wench: Hellooooo?

Jezebel:

Wench: Good night, dear

-- -- --

*the next morning*

Jezebel: I was falling asleep ☠️ but I can’t remember if you ever commented on if there was a point to be made about him not getting in the cart with her. Like he can resist her and she didn’t expect that, or something. And because it seemed like you hadn’t responded I was asking basically if I was looking too deep into it. Like sure maybe she was like: oh ok then. But to me she looked legitimately shocked, as this came right after her telling the Cardinal it would be easy to sway him in their favor. If that makes more sense ☠️😂

Wench: It does a bit, yeah, and, to answer… I kinda adressed it, but only a bit, with the "She does it again --- not with a necklace, but still --- at the end: she offers him a ride in her carriage, and it’s just a simple offer, but with strings --- literally --- attached.” It's another way of drawing him closer/getting him under her influence. And she's feeling Really Confident --- as you said --- about her skill at influencing him. But what he does is a) show loyalty and b) show love. (Both for Constance, but still). This is particularly important because, if you think back to the pilot when they *coughs discreetly behind my fan* laid together, he saw the scar around her neck, asked about it, and, upon hearing that her husband had her almost killed, offers to kill said husband for her. So what we have here is a conflict between her influence and the other people in d'Artagnan's life, and she's been counting on her influence being strongest. (Which is partly because that's how it worked with Athos... even now, buddy can't move on.) But she just got proof that it's very clearly not. He just prioritized Constance (someone who'd just broken up with him, too, and seemingly very cruelly, even if Milady didn't know that) over her, and that's a sign that maybe she's too used to her own allure working and she's misjudged d'Artagnan's character, But it's just a minor thing, so it's not panic yet, just confusion. Does that make sense?

Jezebel: Yes! 🙂

Wench: Good... I feel like half of this shit is not what it is in my head laksdfj

Jezebel: ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️ doubt it, because everything you say makes so much sense

Wench: ☠️😭

Jezebel: The emojissssss

Wench: Shut up But I have had months to think about this. And more since the book.

Jezebel: That was all I had for endpoint though! I just really wanted your two way more than two but I love it cents on that look

-- -- --

Wench edit, many days later: It's occurring to me that those "oop"s are very incomprehensible but idk what they referred to, so I can't put in signal phrasing... sorry :] (Blame Jezebel)

#jezebel (pr)#musketeers #the musketeers #bbc musketeers #bbc musketeers reactions #athos #porthos #aramis #d'artagnan #portamis #<very heavy this time #s01e08 #the challenge

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boyfhees · 2 years

Note

ITS ME AGAIN !;£:£;

I see what u mean with mr choi bc he is a capitalist fiend 🥺 that man is married to the money </3 HOWEVERRR .. when he saved our girlie from getting her ass whooped made me smile, idk why he didn’t come earlier though.

Inhye is gonna see heLL if she keeps acting this way im sorry but her dumbass rlly smelt the orchid when the woman said it’s poisonous and it can killl u??? yet she still smelt it ???? What ?? I rlly hope she gets good character development bc rn she’s so naive </3 the preview for the next episode looks so good !! (side note farmer boy reminds me of kita 🫶)

IM ZAD !! I’ll be in ur inbox every Saturday and Sunday 🙈🙈🙈 and then some 🙈🙈🙈

-zad :>

HI I AM SO LATE SORRY I JUST GOT TIME TO SIT AND RESPOND HELP KSDJDS

honestly ykw i get choi there bc the society is very much driven by money, and the way it's depicted in drama certainly proves that money is that primary factor in the world where they live in ( and irl too, actually ) tho i hope he doesn't lose the bits of morals he has or else i will yell . PLS THE SCENE WHERE HE CAME TO RESCUE ok i am not a fan of the actor per say ,,,, but whenever choi gets screentime i smile like smth has to be wrong w me ,,, MAYBE BC HIS PRESENCE IN THE DRAMA IS SO HEAVY

WHEN INHYE SMELLED THE ORCHID I WAS LIKE IDK AB U BUT I SMELL A DUMBASS LIKE CMON IF SOMEONE TOLD ME THAT THE FLOWER IM HOLDING IS POISONOUS I WOULD DROP IT AND GO WASH MY HANDS ,,,, and i kinda panicked when that guy w inkyung ( sorry i still dont remember the name of character he's playing ig it was jungho or smth ) smelled it too ????? OMG YOURE RIGHT FARMER BOY = KITA esp w the way he knows how to cook >>>

i am sorry this is long but i need to talk ab how annoying hyorin's mom is . HER VOICE TICKS ME OFF HSDKJHD but the actor def did an amazing role ,,, no opinions on her husband ive hated him enough in penthouse this ain't new to me or him ( im honestly concerned ab his public image like someone give him a good role, esp since he's a v versatile actor )

AAAND HI ZAD IM CAELIN / CAEL / LIN WHATEVER U WANT TO CALL TBH IT'S SATURDAY AGAIN SDJHDSSKJ looking forward to interacting more w you !! damn for once i have smth to look forward to on weekends other than classes and the drama thank u

#visitor. — vantaegism.

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thefanficmonster · 3 years

Text

Hidden Powers

Corpse Husband x Reader (Female)

Warnings: Abuse allegations, Swearing, Mild melancholy

Genre: Humor, SLIGHT Angst, Fluff, RPF (Real Person Fic) - Sorry the genres are all over the place

Summary: A misconception or misunderstanding turned rumor threatens to bring down Corpse’s entire career, but luckily, Y/N knows better than to stand aside and let it happen.

Requested by Anon. Hi darling! Thank you so much for your request and I’m so sorry for the long wait but here it finally is and I hope you enjoy the fic if you happen to come across it. Love, Vy ❤

“Fuck this game!“ Y/N yells out in frustration as she is met with the screen informing her of her failure - aka death - for the fifth time in the past hour. “Has anyone ever even passed night four? I’m sure the king of FNAF Markiplier has but I’m also sure he hasn’t done it one a livestream! And my big mouth really had to go ahead and swear not to end this stream until I pass this God forsaken night, ughhh!“

Typically, Y/N’s quite the fearful rat when playing horror games, especially when home alone like right now, but this FNAF game has gradually turned her into a raging gamer instead. Not raging as in kicking ass at the game but as in the game kicking the ass of her sanity. She’s been struggling with this specific night for a while - the better half of her previous stream and an hour into today’s. Well, seeing how little progress she’s making with each try, it’s gonna be way more than an hour into today’s livestream as well. She’ll be lucky if she manages to get past it before hitting the three hour mark or just rage quitting which she’s bound to do eventually if her gameplay keeps going at this rate.

Another try later, she’s once again jumpscared into a failure screen that’s practically mocking her at this point. Throwing her arms above her head, Y/N sighs heavily, the frustration she’s harboring becoming more and more evident in her body language. “You know what, I need a break. Lemme see what you guys are saying in the chat.”

Scrolling through comments upon comments greeting her, sending her compliments and some trolling her with some hateful remarks she comes across a question which makes her brows furrow. That same question is repeated by a few other people but they fly by so quickly she doesn’t manage to catch the people’s usernames.

“A bruise on my arm? Where?“ She says out loud as she inspects both her arms, looking for what her chat had been talking about. That’s when her eyes eyes land on the purple mark on the skin just above her right elbow. She laughs, “Oh this? I know I’m a clumsy person but Corpse is to blame for this one.“

Little does the girl know, her boyfriend, who’s currently in his own apartment instead of camping out at hers, is watching this very stream, laughing his ass off remembering how that bruise came to be.

His laughter is cut short though when he catches glimpse of Y/N’s chat which suddenly floods with concern from her fans - assumptions and allegations of him being an abusive boyfriend starting to pollute the previously cheerful comment section. His stomach turns, for many reasons, each reason making it tighten in a worse and more painful knot.

The first blow comes from people actually coming up with such a thing. How could they even allow their minds to wander to such a dark and disgusting place where he’d be even remotely an abuser.

The second blow to his heart is delivered by the fact that people believed it. How and why could people believe such an absurd idea?! How low did these people think of him? What kind of piece of shit did he come off as to some people?

And the third is the mental image the idea gives him. It’s such a fucked up scene, he can’t even conjure it up, he can’t mentally picture it. Hell, he could and would never even raise his voice at Y/N. He’d never dare upset her or hurt her feelings let alone hurt her....like that!

“Whoa, whoa, whoa!“ Y/N’s gasp reaches him as though it was meant to fish him out of the downward spiral he started going down with these overwhelmingly dark thoughts, “What’s with this nonsense some of y’all are spewing in the chat?!“ She sounds downright angry and irritated, ready to fight whoever will continue spreading these rumors about her lovely boyfriend whom she absolutely adores. “Guys, I mean, seriously?! Do you have any idea what you’re talking about and WHO you’re talking about? Do we have the same Corpse in mind here? I doubt we do - you have some villainized, abusive version, and I have the loving boyfriend who tried to teach me how to handle a lightsaber so we can have a lightsaber fight and my dumbass used my own weapon against me. Yeah, I was pretty salty Corpse laughed his heart out while I was cringing in pain, but man, you guys take it farther than the farthest.“ Seeing his sweet, kind and non-confrontational girlfriend who always avoids conflict at all costs turn into this protective lioness because someone is talking shit about him is heartwarming and scary at the same time. “Y’all better shut the hole where these fucked up rumors surfaced from before you get one of the most innocent, loving and caring individuals in hot water for the BS you came up with! Copy? You better.“

Corpse has never in his entire life seen the topic of a stream chat change so quickly, the rumor never once getting brought up again.

That’s some serious power right there - power he never knew Y/N possessed because of her cute and soft exterior. Now he knows what kinda beast of a woman he’s dating - one prepared to do anything to protect him, no matter who from. And damn does that make him feel emotional and loved despite the shit that just happened. She can make him forget all the bad within the blink of an eye - that too is another superpower of hers, but this one he’s known about from the very start.

@maat-the-prescriptive @simonsbluee @save-the-sky @itsminniekat @hacker-ghost @bi-andready-tocry @imtiredaffff @jazzkaurtheglorious @hereforbeebo @fandomgirl17 @chrysanthykios @maehemscorpyus @loraleiix @letsloveimagines @annshit @i-cant-choose-a-username-help @enigmaticmaze @divine-artemis @waterlilypat @idontknowwhatthisisfam @evi-ka @classyandfabulous00 @redperson58 @lilysdaydreams @solowheein @mythicalamphitrite @axen-gers @luckygirl144 @nj01 @buddyemily @the-albino-lioness @stardream14 @gdhdkfnn @nomadicgypsyy @preciousskye @fluffysuicideunicornsworld @o-kaelin @manacharlotte @awkward-youtube-trash @lolalee24 @bonky-beerns @meme-lord-and-savior-sebastian @strawbrinkofdeath @teenloves @tams0527 @browneyespinkhair @starstruckllamapuppy @daisychains012 @y0ulooked @tinytacosuitcaseflap @supernatural-is-my-only-life @jula-pauline @melodykitty @just-that-bi-girl @crazybutconfidentaf @lowellshade @alphakees @bellero @weallneednamjesus @starryhanji @boiled-onionrings @husherstan @fockingwhore @melaningoddessthings @prettypastelpetals @haleypearce @godwhyamiawkward @y-napotat @daisychainyoonmin @little-miss-rebel3 @free-wheelin-bi-sexual @redmoon261 @darkacademic2 @wiseflamingoqueen @into-the-end @namikhai-i @nastiablr @thelittleplantlover @mirktuan @dont-hyuck @jjk-bunny @vintagegothlover @easygoingtheatre @itsrandombooklover @miiaivi @emmybaybee @befourgolden @jjk-is-my-shit @eternalteaaars @spacebadgerx @princesslunalight @acequinn14 @samm48 @misselsbells06 @simp-lykawa @fo-love @marishimomura-blog @therealglenncoco @cinnamonbun332 @killtherandomness @sanshinexxxsan @fee-btheweeb @press-lay @cathleenpotgieter16 @jazzydoesstuff @moonlxghtbay @forestrain2000 @hyunjinhugs @blood-of-fandoms @lovellylies @ukiyolixx @simpforhpcharacters @chrisdylan17 @parkerjisung @pedernille @theodonyous @wineandionysus @malfoystilinskii05 @morbid-x @coryisagee @jessewa26 @scoobydooluver97 @mindintheskies365 @raeanneinwonderland @indecisive-empanada @gluttonypalace @loriane2503 @btsiguess-kpop @khaoticbunny @lucidlycactus @smiithys @rottenroyalebooks @kpopgirlbtssvt @fangirl-tc27 @fr0z3n-1 @notmesimpingfortechno @shotarosleftpinky @kunoi-chan @idk-whats-wrong-with-me @yikeroonie @goldenstarofthunderclan @poetry-and-tea @ama-do-writing-stuff @wishbonewolf @emeraldxhope @t0xick1tty @kusuinko @speakyourselfloveyourself @sophia902103 @lo-manburg @classsykittykat @dmgama @depressedpuppythatneedscoffee @btsiguess-kpop @akaashi-baby @gun-jong-simp @geschichtenfee @yerapotato-wp @browneyedgirl365 @thysagclub @sparklycloudnight @helloatomicshadow @queentorresstuff @vtte @val-gal @lucy-bunny17 @aaliyahh0 @katluckybear @boyleanti @straybids @franchesca-791 @cosmicstorm19 @averyisbackinthetrashcan @aomi-nabi @xlanawriter @allensimpsforcorpse @sunnyrae-cessh @ladykxxx08 @meowiemari @renupf @booklover76 @sra-verissimo

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tempobaekh · 3 years

Text

Rating Penthouse: War In Life characters

I asked my followers on Instagram to give me Penthouse characters to rate and my thoughts about them so I thought to post it here as well. Now this is my personal opinion about how I feel about the characters and how much I will rate them

⚠️⚠️THIS CONTAINS A FEW SPOILERS⚠️⚠️

My Instagram: Tempobaek

Logan Lee

10/10

Lemme just say I love him SO MUCH

LOGAN LEE BEST BOY

I absolutely loved his character and the fact that he was one of the few people who wants justice and is honest made me love him even more

Him playing Go Hu Dong was amazing as well and I didn't recognize him at all at first like he played it so well with the accent, costume and wig and everything

His accent and language switch in between English and the Busan accent Korean was so fucking sexy🥵

✨Mr. Joo✨

My man was also smart with his revenge

He was also serving amazing LOOKS every episode in the two seasons and I loved every single one of them

And I'm going to be honest here, after watching the preview for S2 ep13 his laugh was creepy in one of the clips and after reading a few theories I lowkey thought that he would be the next villian

I regret suspecting him now

But instead of that they gave us a bigger plot twist and blew up our man with a bomb😩

He literally went ✨LiGhT iT Up LiKe DyNaMiTe✨ (I'm so sorry)

I would've rather have him be a villian than die in the bomb

I MISS HIM ALREADY AND LOVE HIM SO MUCH😭

DID I MENTION THAT I LOVE HIM

Joo Seok Kyung

7/10

Another one that annoyed me angered me so much🙄

Like she was ruthless and had no mercy when it came to bullying and putting people down that she thought were a rival or putting people down in general

She didn't change even when Rona died

She also went as far as to like cheat her way to win the Cheong Ah Art High School trophy and blackmailed Cheon Seojin to win the trophy

But there were times where she would show emotions and those would be often her break down and weak moments

And those moments would really show how she is broken inside and puts up a careless and brave image, she is someone who needs healing even though healing takes time

I also saw someone saying like 'oh Seok Kyung hates her mom so much'

Yeah she hated her mom but she didn't hate her to death like she didn't wish death upon her

Seok Kyung was heart broken when she heard Suryeon's death and that showed that she still loved her mom even though Suryeon didn't give birth to them

I was heart broken when I saw that she cut her hair because here was no one there to tie it for her bc Suryeon loved Seok Kyungs long hair and that's why she didn't cut it but after he mothers death no one was there to tie her hair for her

I started seeing her in a different light after a while bc again it showed that he character was very broken emotionally and needed healing

I'm interested about seeing more of her character development after the last ep where she defended Rona

Also my girl is so hot, another one that was serving amazing looks

Joo Seok Hoon

8/10

He was lowkey annoying at first ngl

Like my man was just🧍🏻‍♂️

It annoyed me so much how he defended his sister so much, fell for her tricks, covered up for her and did anything she said EVEN though its wrong

But after some time I understood that he cared for and that she was the only family left to him

I mean Seok Hoon hate Joo Dan Tae so he doesn't counts and Suryeon was dead at the moment

I will still not forgive him for bullying Seol A even though he regrets it

It also annoyed me how he didn't stood up for Rona at all in the first season even though he liked her

By he got so much better in S2, he was even part in the revenge plan

He is literally the human CCTV camera in Hera Palace like he knows more than even the viewers know

The way he was protective of Rona when he found out she was alive was so aDORABLE

And my man was amazing in the last episodes

I love him

Cheon Seo Jin

4/10

THIS WOMAN MAKES MY BLOOD FUCKING BOIL

Like I sometimes just was to 🤜🏻👩🏻

But sometimes I wanna hug her😩

Idk I feel like she became a horrible person bc of greed and that he father and mother placed too high expectations for her

Instead of praising her for her accomplishments her parents wanted her to do more

Maybe that's why she was desperate for love and affection and found that in Joo Dan Tae even though he pretended to like her

But that definitely does not dismiss her horrible actions

But also the harsh past made her the could hearted person, like she left her father to die

She felt more care towards her daughter after she almost lost her because Eunbyeol tried to commit suicide

She was in alot of pain and you could see it in her cries and when she was on the phone with the person

Soyeon's acting was amazing in that scene

She started to care more about her ex husband and daughter when she saw how much Eunbyeol was suffering and she realized that she genuinely liked Ha Yoon Chul hwen she saw how horrible Joo Dan Tae was

I did feel bad for her sometimes but after seeing that she didn't change I really didn't feel any sympathy for her

She needs therapy

Girlie was shocked when the doctor said she is losing her voice like bestie you are screaming every episode

She was also serving amazing looks every episode

Ha Yoon Chul

5/10

The first male character I simped for

Like I am not going to deny it but he is hot🥵

But the first few episodes he was an absolute asshole and greedy

But I never expected him to be Yoonhee's ex boyfriend

I did like him a tiny bit when he saved Yoon Hee from Kyu Jin

His entrance in S2 with the helicopter was damn hot

And I WAS SO SHOCKED WHEN HE SAID MEET MY WIFE OH YOON HE

LIKE YAY MY SHIP IS SAILING

I spoke too soon

His character development and fighting skills were hot as well

He was ADORABLE with Rona and Yoonhee

I seriously thought that Rona was his daughter

BUT THAN AT THE CHEONG AH FESTIVLE OOF SIR I WANTED TO PUNCH HIM

I WAS SO MAD WHEN HE SABOTAGED RONA'S PERFORMANCE

I began hating him after that💀

Like he went 📈📉 with his character development

AND THEN HE CLEANED EUNBYEOL'S MEMORY FROM THAT NIGHT LIKE SIR SKSHSKSHKS SHE DID HAT TO YOUR DAUGHTER

I actually asked my dad what he thought about what Yoon Chul did and this was his reponse:

"If you look at it from a parents perspective they would want to do anything if they saw their child in pain like he did but I would've also scolded her and had a conversation with her about why she did it instead of wiping her memory from that night like he did. "

So that's that

I LOVED IT WHEN YOON HEE CAME WITH THAT BLOW AND TOLD HIM RONA WAS HER DAUGHTER

Jonghoon's acting was chef's kiss in that scene

I was going to rate him a 4 but I gave him that 5 when I saw how he was at court, he admitted to his wrong doings but also still had feelings for Yoon Hee

I wanna see his reaction in s3 to Rona now bc now that he got to know that is his daughter I wonder how he will be

Lee Kyu Jin

1/10

AN ASSHOLE

USELESS

WHY IS HE HERE

Like I have nothing to say about him rather than I hate him and that he useless just like his wife and son

HE IS LITERALLY NOTHING WITHOUT HIS MOM

I'm only giving him that one bc he was funny in the episodes

THATS THE ONLY REASON HE IS THERE JUST FOR COMEDY PURPOSES

Go Sang Ah

0.5/10

ANNOYING 2.0

USELESS 2.0

ALL SHE DOES IS SPEND HER HUSBAND AND MOTHER IN LAW'S MONEY

LIKE SHE AIN'T EVEN WORKS

UNLIKE KANG MARI

The only thing she does is gossip

And spills the tea☕

SHE IS LITERALLY NOTHING WITHPUT HER HUSBAND AND HIS FAMILY

Giving her a 0.5 bc she is kinda funny eh

Lee Minhyuk

0/10

ANNOYING 3.0

USELESS 3.0

ASSHOLE 2.0

Idk if it runs in the family but again he is useless

And a dumbass

He also nothing without his parents

Why is he there tho like you ain't even funny

All he can do is cause trouble

And bullied Jenny

His dumbass slipped and broke his own arm and blamed it on Rona smh🤦🏻‍♀️

Sometimes I just wanna 🤜🏻👦🏻

Also my dude was trying to sound all intimidating by saying

"Oh Jenny's father is a scary man, yOuR dEaD BaE rOnA"

Like dude worry about yourself bitch you are dead first for bullying Jenny

But like I hate the character but LOVE THE ACTOR HE IS SO HOT OMFG

Joo Dan Tae

0/10

ANOTHER ONE THAT PISSES ME OFF SO MUCH AND MAKES MY BLOOD BOIL

SOMETIMES I DONT WANNA 🤜🏻 I WANNA 🔪

LIKE I HATE HIM WITH A FUCKING PASSION

I DONT CARE ABOUT HIS PAST OR ANYTHING HE IS A GREASY, GREEDY, PSYCHO, OBSESSIVE MANIPULATIVE, POSSESSIVE PSYCHO

Like I legit thought he was nice in he first ep and then I saw him kiss Seojin and-

Me: 🤨😧😃🤮 MY EMOTIONS WENT LIKE THAT

LIKE HE IS SO FUCKING POSSESSIVE OVER SURYEON, AEGYO AND SEOJIN LIKE ITS DISGUSTING

I WAS GETTING YANDERE BEHAVIOUR FROM THAT OLD MAN

PURE TRASH

Bae Rona

9/10

I LOVE HER NOW

RONA BEST GIRL

She was also annoying at first and was very ungrateful

But over time she got better, still a tiny bit annoying sometimes but better

When she came back from the US I WAS LIKE GIRL NO YOU FINNA RUIN THE PLAN

I do feel bad for her bc she went through alot with bullying, her mom going to jail not only once but twice, her getting to know that Yoonchul who she started liking sabotaged her performance, and also literally almost dying

My girl has been through a lot

AND WHEN SHE RUNNED TOWARDS THE STAIRS OUTSIDE WHEN EUNBYEOL WAS CHASING HER I WAS LIKE GIRL RUN TO THE HALL YOU RUNNIN OUTSIDE

I am excited to see her reaction to getting to know that Yoon Chul is her dad

Part 2 is also posted!

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praphit · 3 years

Text

F9: What does Absurdity even mean anymore?

Due to COVID, I thought that my last movie theater experience was going to be "Bad Boys For Life". I'm happy to say that if I died today, I would be telling souls in Heaven that "F9" was the last movie I saw on the big screen (I'm sure that films are big talking points in the after life).

There weren't too many people there:

There was a woman coughing in the corner; I barely looked at her. I imagined that COVID was mugging her, and I didn't want to be a witness, and so have COVID come after me next. I'm vaxxed, but still I was thinking of ways to distract COVID, so I could enjoy the film. There was an old couple sitting up front (like REALLY OLD... sitting UP FRONT... Ha! that's awesome). Awesome or not, I was going to point them out if COVID came after me. There were two obese kids sitting a few rows behind me that I could also point out, as well as my friend that I was sitting next to... what?? Look, they would ALL want me to escape, so I could bring my "F9" review to the people!

WHAT??!

Let's not talk about my survival skills, let's talk some Vin & the Fam - that's why we're here!

It took a while for me to remember what was going on:

Dom (Vin), Letty (M. Rod), and their... kid? Oh, right, they have a kid, and they moved on to start a new life together.

Didn't the real mom die or something?? Idk. You've got the British lady from "GOT" still hanging out with Luda and Tyrese.

(they so crazy)

"Hobbs and Shaw" are still gone

(making their own money, cuz bleep family!).

Brian (Paul Walker's character - rip) is apparently, now everyone's babysitter. So, if anyone in this gang, who could die on any of these missions, ever have kids, they can just send them off to Nanny Brian's.

There's a dude named Mr. Nobody who sometimes sends the gang on secret spy missions.

Oh, and people in the gang keep coming back from the dead. Boom! We're caught up with this absurdity. That's actually what I asked for when I got to the movies

"Give me one ticket for Absurdity please."

In this batch of the absurd, we find out that Dom has a brother, and he's John Cena (Jakob).

Charlize Theron is back! That must have been the worst bet that she has ever lost. I consider her to be one of the most underrated and underappreciated actors we've got, but movies like these ain't helping that case.

And who's idea was it to give her that haircut? - part of the bet she lost, I suppose.

It was reported that the gang goes into space (at least two of them do).

Annnnd the X-Men Jet is back!

(it really does look like that - Wolverine included)

Seriously, after the X-Men's last two movies (which were turrrible), I was expecting them to crossover for a fresh start. Why not?? They're a spy team now, that goes to space! - nothing should be off the table.

They're looking for two halves of some... war sphere?? If put back together with some key... idk... John Cena rules the world.

Remember when Vin and the gang were all about street racing, money, survival, and brown booty? - those were simpler times!

But, why discuss the plot? Seriously, why? None of it makes any sense. From Dom and Letty living like Amish people (which is an ending worse than death for action heroes)

to their convoluted explanation for bringing the latest person back from the dead (which reminds me of a married couple, when the husband or wife get caught watching porn, and try to explain that it was just a pop-up that came out of nowhere. The other spouse gulps their glass of wine and plows forward - that was me with this - gulping my soda (with a lil Henny) saying "whatever guys, let's please just move on".

and what's going on with the two brother's is a thin thread at best. AND the villain's motivation...

But, it's foolish to get into that., and take points off. I LOVE THESE MOVIES, but it ain't for the story. Let's grade "F9" by its own standards:

Racing, Action, and Family (they graduated from booty to family):

Racing

They've done the racing in a small city thing before, but this time it's with magnets! - SUPER MAGNETS!

YES!

I loved this! Cars are getting sucked into magnets. They're using them to make people fly away and explode. Which btw, they did my man Francis Ngannou wrong (an mma fighter). There's a fight scene with a giant white dude on top of a speeding vehicle. That giant white dude could have and should have been the role for Francis, instead he's just here to say high, and then blow up. As much as I loved these scenes, they were too quick in some areas. I think if they had slowed some of the magnet stuff down a bit, we could appreciate more what's happening.

Action

M.Rod is legit.

She needs her own franchise. The only action star I enjoyed more than her was Vin, and that's really due to the absurdity of one scene. Do y'all remember the "Civil War" scene when Captain America has one hand on a building and another pulling back a helicopter??

It's the same level of strength needed for what Vin does in some underground chambers. You can see a bit of it in the trailer. He pulls the whole place down, and then, just like in "Civil War", he ends up in the water (but unconscious). Oh, and he does this after beating up like 50 people at once. Ha! I love it! Then, how he is rescued (cuz c'mon, he can't die) is splendidly preposterous, and I mean that is a complimentary way. That scene is perfection.

The only action that bothers me comes from Dom's sister (mia).

She just doesn't sell being a fighter, but whatever. No disrespect... she’s beautiful, but... her hair might weigh more than the rest of her body.

Apparently, the highest trained fighters (agents) in the world (who have GUNS) never trained for a unskilled, unprepared, 110 lb woman in her 40's with a frying pan.

Family & Corona

Tyrese and Luda are always funny, but their act is growing a bit thin. It actually felt like an act this time around. I think it's time to add another black man in the mix; perhaps one who's older than they are... TRACY MORGAN?

Throw an OG in there and it'll freshen things up again. I do like though how Tyrese is starting to suspect that they might be immortals. I think they should test that theory out in the next movie; maybe have Tyrese break the fourth wall, kinda like Deadpool, as he realizes this is just a dumbass movie.

Dom and Letty's kid... terrible. I'm sorry! This is a bias of mine, but kids normally suck at acting. This one is no exception. Just get an older actor to play the young kid. I'm thinking Ryan Reynolds would have been a good choice.

You may be saying "that's absurd!" - I'm glad that y'all can still tell what that word means, cuz I can't.

The rest of the chemistry family magic is great!

Oh, and Cardi is here, but... barely (for like 30 seconds, if that).

No rapping, no wapping, no cursing... kind of a waste of Cardi B, if you ask me.

John Cena aka Jakob with a K!

Meh. JC def has charisma, just not in this movie. He doesn't stand out at all. You know?? - The Rock, Jason Statham, Charlize Theron, etc all have a presence about them in this franchise. Cena?! what happened, buddy?

There are certain music artists whom you'd think would have a great personality based off their music and how they dress. But, then you meet them, and you realize that they're just normal bozos like you and I (only rich and famous). And normal bozos like you and I, AT TIMES can be boring. You gotta have some flair if you're not going to have personality. Give my man some pink glittery highlights, a face tat, some vampire teeth, and maybe a chainsaw for his left arm or something.

Grade: Good action. The absurdities were funny. I was entertained! Production was great! BUT it's getting tired, my friends. It's the same formula that I've mentioned and then, like always, they're grilling and drinking Corona's in the sun. After nine movies (with at least two more on the way)... I never thought I'd say this, but it's actually not absurd enough. Wait... I seriously can't believe I just said that.

I need to say that again to know it's real.

This movie wasn't absurd.. enough? ENOUGH. IT WASN'T! They're going to need to step it up for the next two.

They were in space, but not for long. They raced for the most part in regular cars (regular for them). . You only brought ONE person back from the dead??! C'mon! We can do better.

I'm giving it an entertaining C+

I like that we saw different younger Dom's (during flashbacks) through time. I think that the next type of vehicle they bust out should be a DeLorean.

Y'all feel me?? TIME TRAVEL, baby!

Vin and the gang race through time! They can have Tracy Morgan. They'll each have a younger version (or older) of themselves join the group. Cardi B will actually do something this time - maybe turn into a car!

And maybe Cable shows up as they tie it to Marvel.

Think bigger, Vin!

#f9 #john praphit #praphitproductions.com #action movies #movie reviews #marvel #praphit #vin diesel #michelle rodriguez #racing #fast and furious #cardi b

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tellywoodtrash · 3 years

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immj2 01.04.21 lb

lmao, guess i'm back on my bs.🤷🏽‍♀️🤷🏽‍♀️🤷🏽‍♀️

vansh don't know shit about "his" riddhima, if he thinks she'd “bina soche-samjhe pee jaati” esp. after that paralyzing crap he pulled. she should tell him that and prove it's the real her.

can he stop answering every question with another question?????? so annoying.

this whole scene is so fucking dumb. anyone with a brain cell can tell it's obviously truth serum, coz he can't kill her and needs the truth.

“tum pregnant nahi ho kyunki tum riddhima nahi ho.” coz................. only one woman on the planet can be pregnant at a time? amazeballs logic, sir.

gotta say i love R 2.0 and her completeeeeee refusal to abide by V's fuckery.

WHAT THE FUCK HE JUST TACKLED HER TO THE GROUND JFC MAN EVEN IF SHE’S NOT PREGNANT THAT CAN’T BE HEALTHY FOR HER BONES

hahahahaha she's like "you want riddhima? i'll give you riddhima, bitch" and JUST plants one on him.

ofc he's the kinda weirdo who keeps his eyes open while being kissed.

lmaoooooooooo he lost himself in it. riddhima’s got a magic tongue huh? that proves her identity like some kinda biometric, but also soothes angry husbands into submission.

lollllllllllllllll he's having a real crisis of faith. coz if this is riddhima, man has he fucked up BIG TIMEEEEEEEE. if it isn't riddhima, he's still fucked up big time, by letting humshakal girl tongue-kiss him into oblivion.

he's so fucking stupid, why won't he just get a DNA test...................... WHY WON'T ANYONE IN THIS SHOW GET DNA TESTS WHEN PPL WHO LOOK LIKE OTHER PPL SHOW THE FUCK UP OUTTA NOWHERE ACTING FUNNY???

oh wait. does he think this is riddhima after all? coz he's ranting about dhoka and all............ if she's a doppelganger then kaahe ka dhoka????

ofc, aryan walked by and heard the rant. abbe yaaaaaaaar.

WHO THE FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKK DOESN'T LOCK THEIR LAPTOP WHEN THEY WALK AWAY????? VANSH-I-WANT-ALL-MY-SECRETS-KEPT-FOREVER-RAISINGHANIA THAT'S WHO. MAIN TOH SUSU KARNE BHI NA JAAOON WITHOUT LOCKING MY COMPUTER. I’M NOT LEAVING MY SHAMEFUL INTERNET HISTORY OUT THERE FOR THE WORLD TO SEE.

oh ghar mein naya siyaapa yeh hai ki siya went off somewhere, despite vansh locking her up in her room. man, wtf he's really turning into some 90s movie villain dad.

ishani happy and vansh realllllllll unhappy about siya joining ishani's ranks of being a “bitch” (which is what this show calls all women who have a mind of their own............)

anupriya, you shoulda saved all this momming for the shitty boys you raised, instead of pushing patriarchal bs on the girls.

“siya vansh raisinghania ki behen hai, koi uska baal bhi baanka nahi kar sakta!!!!!!!!!” uh...............................

ppl would wanna murder her PURELY for the reason that she’s YOUR sister, dumbass.

ugh this sasta!vansh and his ganda saxophone playing (always the same irritating tune). nahiiiiiiiiiiii chahiyeee humeinnn. mujhe mera kabirrrrrr do wapassssssssssss!!!!!!!

siya has taken vihaan bhai's “taadna is free of cost” motto to heart and is drinking the shirtlessness in. i'd be all for it if it was literally anyone else other than her own brother-dad's clone.

he’s like does your mom know you’re here, does your family know you’re here? she’s a fucking grownass woman, vyom. a dumb bitch who shouldn’t be out here unsupervised, but........ she grown.

OMFGGGGGGGGGGGGHE KEEPS SAYING “CHERRY” AND I LEGIT THOUGHT THAT WAS FAKE!RIDDHIMA’S NAME TILL NOW.................... I JUST GOT IT IN THIS SCENE, THAT HE WAS ACTUALLY SAYING THE THE FRENCH WORD “CHÉRI” AND THAT’S HOW HE REFERS TO ALL WOMEN.

her parvati bani poo parivartan is khaali looks mein haan, she still calling him AAP and talking like a coy little baby.

LMAO EMBARRASSED FOR WHAT???????? HAVING A TINYASS UNNOTICEABLE RIP IN HER THICKKKKK DENIM JACKET?????

yeh banda shirt hamesha paas rakhta hai, par pehnta nahi. it’s like his version of a fire extinguisher. if it’s being used, things have gonna hella wrong.

alskdjalskjdlaskjdlaksjlk he’s made a new saxophone dhun named after her. height of romance!!!!!!!!!!!!!! vansh bhai, kuch seekho. nahi, aapko toh hamesha biwi ko paralytics ya zeher ya truth serum pilaana hai, ya baat baat par goli maarni hai.

ishani is right, siya really needs to get out more, coz if she’s falling for this kinda basiccccccccccc bullshit..............

aryan has brought dadi to see riddhima waala proof. it doesn’t need to be April 1st to know that iska bohut bada popat banne waala hai.

yup vansh is here to dunk on him nice and good. oh aryan......... idk why you even try.

sassy vansh is the ONLY tolerable vansh.

oh daaaaaaaang aryan real mad, calling him bastard and all. show OTT pe aane ko wait kar raha tha aryan, taaki asli gaali bulaa sake.

dadi: “kisi par ilzaam lagaane se pehle dus baar soch liya karo.” coz............. that’s what YOU did, before you put everything that was happening in this house on riddhima’s head? even though you had zero proof???? i really think vansh needs to take dadi for a MRI or some shit coz her behaviour is just bizarre these days.

ofc he’s gonna answer it like WOH ZINDA HAI, MERE DILLLLLLLLLL MEIN.............

ok “yaadon mein”, same difference.

ishani, a spouse is for more than just sexual gratification. lord. everyone in this show needs so much couple’s therapy.

WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU HAVE YOUR LOCATION ON FOR HER TO TRACK, ANGRE??????????? OMG YOU’RE THE WORST SECURITY PERSON FUCKING EVER. KHANNA BHAIYYA BHI ITNE BEWAKOOF NAHI THE.

asakdjlaskjdlaskjdlksajdfkjsd angre legit contemplating leaving his boss ka most valuable asset unattended coz his wife wants to fuck.

riddhima’s like yeah go, mujhe nahi mil raha toh kya, tum toh at least mazze le lo.

angre is convinced this is riddhima bhaabi. giving kasme vaade of even dying for her.

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha he thinks vansh/riddhima were IDEAL COUPLE...... dude, isse zyaada ideal toh biryani aur ketchup waala combo hai.

godddddddddddddddd anyone with a brain cell has by this point deduced ki this is real riddhima and she’s doing all this to save vansh from vyom in some way. stop taking the audience to be as idiotic as the main characters, show.

lmaooooooooooooooooooo vansh was all I’LL FIND SIYA and now he’s just sitting in the living room with his angry bird face till she decided to waltz in the front door. sooooooo.......... ishani can track her hubs, but you telling me vansh doesn’t have a tracker on siya????

what hulia??????? everyone’s ragging on siya’s new style while ishani and riddhima and that lollipop chick can wear whatever the fuck they want? what nonsense.

lmao everyone’s horrified to find out that siya’s learnt the basic definition of feminism. itne saal tak they kept her in the house so she wouldn’t know, but hawa lag hi gayi ladki ko.

precap: lollipop girl rubs up against vansh warning him ki aryan knows his secret. aryan and angre haathapaai as the former tries to shoot riddhima. they’ve framed the scene like he got her, but i bet he didn’t. koi aur aa gaya hoga saamne.

#ishq mein marjawan 2 #immj2 #immj2 lbs #episode liveblogs

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firepiplup · 3 years

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How do i say no to people

You know that analogy about people with adhd having spoons for energy management or whatever? My spoons are on backorder from like 2 months ago and more got on that list now

The problem is that all of the things I'm being asked to do are Very Important Things

I have to feed my diabetic cat. This in itself is not a problem, however she's needs to eat at a specific time (12 hour spacing) and my current sleeping situation along with work do not allow this to happen consistently. Currently trying for 7:30, we'll see how it goes

My apartment has bedbugs, and there's no way in fucking hell I'm sleeping on my living room floor until my scumlord landlord actually gets the guy to come back to spray because he did spray but I'm still seeing adults and i "need to give the spray time to work" it's been fucking 2 weeks i don't know how is supposed to work but i feel like after 2 weeks whatever spray you did isn't going to get any stronger i just want to sleep in my own bed it's been like this since fucking March

With that part explained, I'm sleeping at my mom's house on the other side of town. This in itself isn't much of a problem, however as "payment" i have to take care of her dog in the morning, to practice because she's going on a week long vacation in October and none of her dogs can just be taken care of like normal dogs. He needs to wear a diaper to leave the room while i pick up his shit and soiled weewee pad and mop the floor, give him some time to be out of his room, and then feed him his special food mix. The other dog has allergies and probably will get into something he shouldn't, then not use the bathroom outside even though he literally has a doggy door that has constant access to the backyard. Neither dog get along with each other, which is why they are separated. Thank fuck the cat is just normal, this is why i prefer them

Now with THAT explained, it's difficult to take care of my own cat on time in the morning. But as the legendary Billy Mays says: But wait, there's more!

I just got rehired at my job working in a local understaffed pizzeria. My friend, ego also works there, is on vacation (good for her, she deserves it, absolutely no negativity towards her) so i have acquired her hours. So i now work 6 days a week, kinda sorta clopen but i guess it's more of opelose. Or a combination of both? Idk. The point here is, I'm then dealing with essentially running half a restaurant alone 6 days a week, with it not being 7 purely because the owner himself ALSO has the same work schedule as far as I'm aware, and wanted to give himself a day off, and since we are so understaffed it would be impossible unless we literally closed. My tasks include answering the phone, washing dishes, making sandwiches, making dinners, folding pizza boxes, and cleaning the tables/equipment on that side of the restaurant. So essentially everything except making pizzas, cleaning the pizza area, mopping in general, and driving. We generally close at 9, 10 on Friday and Saturday. Guess who was explicitly rehired to close those days? Guess how that's going to work with me having to be home around 7:30 to take care of my own cat? I have no idea either. It's only for about 3 weeks, but my mom, whom i have not asked for any additional help with anything, won't feed the cat while i have work, even though there isn't a guarantee that i can leave on time to THEN RETURN to close, because again I'm the only one on that side of the building. I understand the fear of the bedbugs, so that's probably it, but it still fucking sucks because the kitchen is on the other side of the apartment from the bedroom and there is literally no reason to go there to feed her. But i get it

Did we get to where i can do my own ADLs? Of course not. My neighbor is in the hospital, and her husband is blind. This is a new development that was only discovered an hour before starting this post (about 3:30 am for me). She's ok, it's for mental health reasons, and that's her own business about that. Her husband being blind is not a new development however. And he needs help taking care of the pets, specifically the birds. Which is fine, they just also need to eat on their own schedule. 8am, around lunchtime, and 8pm. Guess who's still at work? One of the birds is special needs because her beak got injured and needs to be essentially spoon fed. Which the blind husband can't do at all. Fairly simple task, but just adding to my obligations that are Very Important because they involve making sure things don't starve to death while my neighbor is in Crisis

Ok let's see, that's 4 Very Important Tasks/Obligations, and only one was originally my own voluntary one. Still not at taking care of myself yet, but i have my shelter, i have my job ("part time" minimum wage, hurray. Part time because even with me being there 6 fucking days a week open to close it still isn't technically enough hours for the state to recognize it as full time), and I'm taking care of *counting* about 8 pets for the next week. Will unemployment give me my money that I've been claiming since March? No? Will they let me claim with my new working hours that makes that while process even harder? Technically but it'll take over an hour for it to process and it doesn't even do that in the end? Well fuck, guess i have to wait to get paid on the books in cash and beg for a hand written paystub and have my hours worked written down. Glad i earned $100 this week, i hope now that my hours have increased i get some more

Next on the list, appointments. Because I'm a dumbass who can't remember shit if it isn't consistently recurring, i overbooked myself for next week. My much needed therapy appointment with my therapist that I've only met once and is the replacement for my much better therapist that i actually had a relationship with is supposed to have a session with me on Tuesday. Will i remember to do it this time? Possibly since i actually remembered it's on Tuesday. Will she send me the reminder text with the zoom link? Probably not. Wednesday, my one day off, thank fuck for that, is the main problem with the scheduling. My med appointment is for 11:30. Cool, can do. Driving lesson at 12. Oh, that's a little close, but i can manage that probably. I only average 1 lesson per year and a half, so it's fine, it's "healthy" to be nervous about operating a death machine powered by explosions. Have to go to social services to pick up, or attempt to, a new food stamps card. They probably close at 5, and add a Non Driver, i need to rely on someone to take me. The sooner the better, but it can't be during the lesson. Don't forget to take care of the creatures before and during all of this.

Ok. Great. There's an hour before work. Time to shower, because it's so fucking hot I'll be sweating like crazy by the time i get around the corner to the pizzeria, with me literally getting out and dressed and then walking out the door. Glad i finally did still to take care of myself. Eating? I might have something i can heat up quickly while the cat eats and so i can take my own meds. Dishes? Those are going to have to wait, i hope the heat wave doesn't get too bad, but it's been like this for a while, still slowly chipping away at them. Sleep? Severe insomnia. I partially blame the bed, my mattress is so comfortable, i hope the bedbugs like it because i can't fucking use it right now. I'd be sleeping so fucking soundly if i were in my own bed, and yet here i am. Maybe i should take the Trazodone now. I just hope I'll wake up on time. Oh look I'm exhausted, can't afford to buy comparatively better prepared coffee from Dunkin, so i guess my shitty at home coffee is going to have to do. Black because i don't have any creamer or milk or lactose free milk in my house. Just the way i hate it. Gonna have to deal with that i guess, maybe I'll learn to like it

The coffee pot lives in my fridge now. I'm worried to put it with the other dishes because if it sits there, not being washed like everything else, then i won't even have the option of coffee. It's just water and ground up beans, I'm sure it's fine

Maybe i can find some kind of coping skill/hobby to help me through my limited me time. Let's see.... I like to crochet, and that helps me get through the dishes by letting me alternate between them and a row/round on one of my many started projects. What? It's in a giant garbage bag with a bedbug treatment stick because of the damn ass bedbugs? Can't open it for at least another week and even then there isn't a place to put the yarn safely? Well fuck. I found that really helpful with keeping me grounded. Umm, well looking online, i should *checks notes* buy new yarn in the meantime and keep it somewhere safe. Uh, well, i can't afford more yarn now and i have nowhere to put it. Videogames it is maybe? Oh fuck now I've hyper focused too long on pokemon, rhythm heaven, and whatever daily games i do, i think i have 5 of those of varying lengths of time spent on them

Did i remember to brush my teeth? No. Do i remember that i should and then when i get out of the shower so i forget to actually execute? Yes. Have i gone insane? Probably

How many spoons is a person supposed to have per day? It takes more for me just to get through the day in general. Why does everyone need me to do their Very Important Tasks? Why is there never anyone else? Can my neighbor just not buy more birds when she gets home from Crisis?

I just want to have good mental health, why is this so hard

#adhd #autistic adult #bedbugs #pizza #cats #birds #diabetes #anxiety #rant #exhaustion #dogs #work #spoons

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urproblematicfav-arsonk · 4 years

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There's a lot of things about Borderlands 3 that makes it kinda a garbage game. And all of those things are valid and true but a aspect of bl3 that deeply bothers me isn't something I've really seen people talk about?? Maybe they have but I missed it but I want to say my interpretation. (Also like, spoiler warning throughout all of this post)

To start off with: hi, I'm a autistic afab nonbinary person and this is relevant for this little rant I'm bout to go on.

I want to begin by stating why I love this franchise so much.

Borderlands, whether you like it or not, is INCREDIBLY queer. And not in a coded kind of way, it's just flat out gay as fuck. And that means so fucking much to me. Borderlands 2 was one of the first times I ever felt fully represented in a game. Zer0 being this dumbass making Yugioh references and generally being a fun garbage boy and also being nonbinary meant a lot to me and I adore him to this day (nonbinary people can use gendered pronouns fuc off). And getting more and more into this series and finding out that basically every character was on some level queer was really cool to me. Maya being asexual and most of the characters being attracted to multiple genders so honestly and off handily was so refreshing and amazing to get to play through. The casual mentions of a woman's wife or some man's husband in the echo's you find or Moxxi talking about her ex girlfriends was one of the reasons I loved this so much.

Another thing I loved particularly about Borderlands 2 was how feminist it was. I can not tell you how quickly I lost my shit at Mr. Torgue talking about the friend zone being misogynistic(it is btw). And the repeated jokes about fully murdering men for being rude to women was some of the highlights of my first playthrough. Punching a guy till he explodes because he disrespected a sex worker?? Fucking immaculate.

SPEAKING OF SEX WORK.

Mad Moxxi is a icon. She is a mother of MULTIPLE children, a survivor of rape and assault and a fucking bad bitch who runs a now intergalactic titty bar. Getting to have not only a sex worker be respected in a narrative, Moxxi is fun and a genuinely complex character who isn't defined by her job or her appearance. She is emotional and strong and funny and flawed but amazing person.

And then there's the way the male characters a represented and treated. I'll be honest here, I haven't really played Borderlands 1, mostly because have been spoiled by auto pick up and also I just didn't feel like it. So my idea of most of the men are based entirely off of Bl2, the pre-sequel and Tales. Anyway, Mordecai in particular is a character I really liked upfront. I love how a lot of his motivation and character is driven by his love of animals and Bloodwing. He's kind and though troubled knows when to get his shit together and be there when he needs to be. His casual "are you okay?" After the latter falls in the Arid Nexus was such a nice moment and the way he genuinely tries to be there emotionally for all of the people around him who he cares for is so fucking rare to see in a male character. And his arc of giving up alcohol to focus on being a better bird dad and you getting to help Brick make Mordecai a special gift to celebrate his sobriety is so amazing and I'm so proud of him.

Mr. Torgue is my dad and I love him. As mentioned, he is normal and believes that the friend zone is absolute garbage talk is ICONIC™ and the best scene in that game fight me. Torgue is a crybaby. He is an emotional person who is not afraid to express his pain and hurt when people are mean to him. He respects women and loves unicorns. The fact that is physical appearance is a big muscle guy who screams but is the literal opposite of toxic masculinity will forever make him the best male character of all time and I love him and he is my dad.

Roland was a character that I was never in particularly attached to but I still respect him and did enjoy his presence. I really appreciated his leadership style being primarily based on empathy and logic as opposed to him being a big meanie man with a HUGE dick who yells at people. I always really resonated with the echo from Tannis talking about how she came to Sanctuary. Roland going out of his way to bring Tannis to safety while completely respecting her autism and struggle with socializing really made his death hit harder when Tannis was very obviously distraught by losing him. It really seems that Roland was the only one who didn't treat her differently. And as someone who's autistic, finding people who legit 100% understand and respect you and just let you live the way you want/need to is kinda hard and those are the qualities I'd personally want in a leader.

Angel is also a big spot of affection for me. Handsome Jack being a irrefutably horrible person who Angel flat out says gaslights people and killed her means a lot to me considering 99% of Bad Parent stories end with "I forgive u" getting to see an abusive victim take that narrative and say fuck you was powerful and meant a lot to me coming from my own abusive home life.

There's a lot of other things I love about Borderlands but if I keep going I won't stop lol so let's get into why Borderlands 3 makes me so uncomfortable.

One of the main things that bothered me was the sexism. Its nothing too horrifying but given how feminist bl2 was it was really shocking and a bit hurtful the number of times women are called bitches or made to seem crazy. If you recall I brought up how you punch a man to death for calling a woman a bitch? Yea no, in this game we mock women for having boundaries and opinions because lol she's just a CRAZY BITCH who just needs to stop acting so hysterical am I right guys?

Yea the whole mission with that stupid bear thing and his ex robot girlfriend made me insanely uncomfortable and upset. I kept waiting for the gotcha moment where it says actually this bear guy is a dick and he shouldn't use language like that but no we just,,,,,, are supposed to laugh along. I hate it.

Even though Borderlands 3 is still very much queer, this game introducing 2 new trans characters as well as a whole DLC about a gay marriage and one of the playable characters being a lesbian there was this some shit that bothered me.

The mission where you crash and ruin a lesbian wedding.

That mission made so upset and uncomfortable. I hated how traumatized and hurt Tumorhead was as I murdered her family and wife. I hated how unfulfilling the mission was where PLOT TWIST the lady was actually a spy or whatever. I hate how there's a mission about ruining some poor psycho ladies wedding. I would've much more preferred a mission where Idk Bloodshine asks you to help her kill a spy who's causing problems and then fucking go around Promethea collecting wedding decorations or something. OR MAYBE JUST NOT A MISSION WHERE YOU KILL LESBIANS FOR NO FUCKING REASON.

I'm mad, anyway.

I also hated how Tannis was treated in this game. Under absolutely no circumstance would Doctor Patricia Tannis ever willingly take up a position of leadership. She is a severely autistic woman who gets nose bleeds from talking to people she wouldn't just be like "I'm in charge now pls talk to me!!!" Fuck off. And the joke about her dating a minecart isn't funny. The whole thing with the chairs, though funny in its absurdities was still a very important and powerful moment of character exploration. Tannis is insane. She is traumatized and hurt and in a moment of severe torture, she humanized some inanimate objects to cope. Tannis crying over the echo over Phillip is a heartbreaking moment of true vulnerability. It is also funny, because that's how good dark comedy works. It can be both hysterical and emotionally ruining at the same time. So what exactly does Tannis divorcing a minecart mean? What is this saying about her character? Why is it funny? Because lol lol reference??? Again, fuck off.

I hate how the Calypso twins childhood is handled. Troy implies it was horribly abusive and traumatic. But when we met Typhon whatever, he acts like it wasn't that bad??? He acts like he just didn't buy his kids the latest iPhone and oh no whoopsie now they're evil, my bad guys. It feels super weird and I don't like it.

Speaking of abusive parents. THEY DID MY GIRL ANGEL DIRTY SO BAD. This was literally when I decided I hated this game. Angel being the one who killed her mother and not Jack was fucking horrible. Especially after the literal foreshadowing in borderlands 2 implying he did. The fact that Jack is treated like a fearful man making what he thought was the right decision was insulting. I get that MattPat manipulated the fandom into thing Jack is a uwu bean but fuck you, you're the writers and you should fucking know better. Handsome Jack saw his daughter had power and turned her into a living battery for him to use as he saw fit. He was not scared and he was NOT right. Fuck you and fuck you for framing child abuse as chill and ok if your spooked enough like that. And the mission directly contradicts the echo's in Get To Know Jack. If Angel killed her mom why does she ask Jack where her mommy is when he's putting her in her chambers?? Why is it in the echo Jack is aggressive and forcibly and hurtfully makes her go into her chambers but in the memory, he's quiet and passive about it?? That's literally just flat out bad writing. Also fuck you.

Anyway,

I think that's really all I wanted to say about this topic. Obviously, there are also things that suck about bl3 but I'll try to chill and not make this too long.

I mostly wanted to make this to see if people cared/are bothered by the same things I am. I've seen how some of the fandom treats the more emotional and gay aspects of this franchise(the people throwing a fit over Amara, the friend zone line, not respecting trans peoples pronouns, sexualizing and being gross about Moxxi)

Anyway that's it byeeeeeeeeeeeee

#rant time #i was also gonna post this on reddit but it turns out i don't know how to use that app lol #so i prob wont #but dont worry still got tumblr #anyway #borderlands #borderlands spoilers #borderlands 3 spoilers #borderlands 3 #borderlands 2

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on-stand-bi-help · 4 years

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So I this are just a bunch of texts that I sent my cousin and I thought why not post it on Tumblr as well!

Please do not take this seriously this is just some really bad comedy. Hope you enjoy. (Also this does have swear words and I mean a lot of swear words so you have been warned.)

Ok I haven’t edit this at all so sorry for my grammar and sorry if this doesn’t make sense

So a new MLB episode came out and it’s a special? Idk to be honest but here are my thoughts cause I want you to watch it! So there is a fucking new intro! It reminds me of the old Barbie movies intros not gonna lie but I guess it’s kinda cool.

Ok so their flying abilities or powers or whatever look really weird and I don’t like them. Alya showing the camera back and forth gave me a headache.

Ok but Ladybugs knowing about roses and their meanings gives me fanfic vibes not gonna lie. Chat trying his best too whoo Ladybug and respecting their boundaries (which she made by the way) freaking adorable not gonna lie. Chat being flustered fuck I just realized how much I missed him. Ugh Ladybug’s soft look and as soon as she leaves Chat’s soft look fuck they are adorable omg. Ok Chat saying that he needs to give himself some flowers cause he is amazing. 100% agree 10/10 you deserve it. TREAT YO SELF!

Ugh definitely did not miss Marinette’s obsession with Adrien omg. She’s really trying to lie to tikki bro you’re with her all the time. You can’t lie to her plus she’s been alive since the beginning of the universe and you’re telling me you are honestly trying to lie to her. God damnit Marinette you are such a dumbass.

LMAO THE STUDENT FILM OH MY FUCKING GOD!! THAT’S SO FUNNY!

God damn I saw on tumblr people comparing Draco to Chloe and I’m like bro Draco is a meme and a great character. Chloe is a bitch who is so fucking annoying.

OMG THE TEACHER IS PREGNANT ALL SHE HAD TO SAY WAS I HAVE MEDICAL EXAMS AND I KNEW!!! FUCKKKK YESSSS A RED HEADED BABY!!!

Can you imagine there is a whole episode where the class has to take care of the baby (for whatever reason) and all of them freaking out cause this baby is too precious and Alya coming in and saving the day and being like guys calm down. It’s all good. Nino fucking going soft trying to help Alya as best as he can. Marinette and Adrien never doing this before so both of them are super flustered and nervous! God I WOULD LITERALLY KILL FOR THAT EPISODE NOW HOLY SHIT!!!

Ok damn Kim really ain’t holding back like chill dude. He really just told the principal that the science teacher isn’t cool. You tell that to your friends not the fucking principal. You dumbass.

LILA IS HERE FUCK!!! God not only do I have to deal with Chloe’s bullshit but Lila’s too omg. Ok idk if it’s the website that I’m watching it in but their voices sound weird and I hope it’s just the website and not the actual episode.

Marinette shut the fuck up ADRIEN WAS TALKING BITCH!!! YOU INTERRUPTED HIM!!! Lmao nice save Marinette talking about the film to distract everyone from the fact that you like Adrien. GOD DAMNIT ADRIEN’S SOFT LOOK FUCK!!! HE LOVES HER SO MUCH BUT HE DOESN'T KNOW IT YET OMG!!! GOD DAMN!!! Lmao Lila’s face! Yeah fuck you Lila! Bitchass!

So Marinette is telling everyone that she is over Adrien. Alya isn’t falling for this bullshit! Love that. Marinette, why are you lying just ask them to help you move on. Like I can see the effort but I don’t understand why you are lying about it if you aren’t completely over him. Like bruh. ALEX REALLY SAID “No kidding” to when Marinette said that she was acting crazy. YES ALEX QUEEN! CALL HER OUT! Marinette saying that she just wants to be friends with him and not in love with him. (ARE WE FINALLY GETTING THE CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT THAT WE ALL DESERVE HOLY SHIT IM LIVING!) Nope nvm she’s still on her bullshit. Did Alya just say that if Marinette will be ok with her and Adrien going to New York together because it may be too romantic. Like Bitch YOU GUYS LIVE IN PARIS! I'M SURE SHE WILL BE FINE!

FUCK YOU GABRIEL!! DIDN’T MISS YOU AT ALL YOU FUNKY ASS BITCH!!!

BRUH ANOTHER MIRACULOUS FOR REAL!!!

DAMN! Lmao Marinette trying to look tough that’s so funny to me! Who you trying to scare bitch cause you ain’t fooling anyone. Bruh Gabriel really friendzoned Marinette for Adrien lmao! Omg I love that. Fuck. I hate Gabriel so much.

I DIDN’T KNOW KIGMA WAS GOING TO BE IN THIS EPISODE!! YAY! EW WTF DID SHE JUST KISS HIM! ARE YOU KIDDING! WAIT WHEN DID THEY GET TOGETHER!! WTF! I DON’T REMEMBER THIS!

Marinette you are so annoying. Where’s Ladybug?! SHE’S SO MUCH BETTER! HOLY SHIT IT’S LADYBUG! OK BUT THAT SCENERY LOOKS SO ROMANTIC! Wait yeah both of them are going to New York like who is going to protect the city?! Oh shit nvm I’m a dumbass hawk moth is going too. Lmao! I’m an idiot! Ok BUT THAT WEIRD BUTTON THING IS ADORABLE OMG!!! AWWW! LIKE WTF!! I WANT ONE! BRUH HOW CAN SHE NOT LIKE CHAT NOIR WTF IS WRONG WITH HER!!! GODAMNIT!

Gabriel really said Surprise bitch to Adrien lmao. Damn poor Gorilla. I can’t believe he still doesn’t have a fucking name godamnit. Lmao I love plagg. Ew god damnit fuck you GABRIEL!

OMG LUKAAAAA! Marinette fucking date him already wtf. He is literally biking your stupid ass to catch up to the bus. GOD LUKA DESERVES BETTER! Marinette you always fucking ruin the moment fuck you. Fuck you. AGAIN LUKA DESERVES BETTER! Luka honey no don’t look at her like that you deserve better. Flashback to the perks of being a wallflower quote, “We accept the love we think we deserve” FUCK YOU BRAIN WHY YOU DO ME LIKE THIS!!

ALYA IS A TRUE FRIEND!!! Bro my friends would be laughing their ass off and making funny faces at the window instead of asking the teachers to stop the bus. HE WAS CARRYING HER SUITCASE TOO OMG! BRO LUKA HAS SOME STRONG ASS LEGS LIKE DAMN!!! Luka then says, “You know what’s important Marinette, that this trip gives you some clarity.” PLEASE GOD THAT SHE FALLS FOR CAT NOIR!!! PLEASE THAT SHE STARTS LIKING HIM!!! PLEASE! BITCH WHY KISS HIM ON THE CHEEK OMG WHY?! He likes you and you decide to kiss him on the cheek. Bro you are just making him fall for you more. Goddammit you are an idiot.

Bruh one look at Adrien and she becomes a tomato god damn. Am I being hard on Marinette cause she reminds me of me. NO WTF!!! Shut up! (At least I’m not a stalker or someone who gets obsessed with my crush in obnoxious ways.)

FUCK YOU CHLOE WE DIDNT WANT YOU TO COME YOU STUPID HOEEE!!!

I JUST REALIZED THIS IS A MOVIE!!! 12 minutes in and I just realized this is a movie. I AM AN IDIOT!!! God I’m so dumb lol. Ok this animation not gonna lie is kinda good.

He really yelled at Marinette in front of everybody in a plane huh. That’s so funny. Also he sounded like such a jock like wtf was that. Lmao Alya and Nino just looking at them like yessss our ship!!! (Alya and Nino are such a mood) This movie is literally like a fucking fan fiction. Adrien, “Oh yeah you’re sitting next to me!” Marinette fucking panicking. Omg this is literally a fanfic. I can’t! I love this omg. I LOVE ALYA SO MUCH OMG!!! Did Marinette just call Adrien her husband. YOU’RE LIKE 14 SHUT UP!!! PLEASE!!! How can you confuse husband with friend. Ok this just confirms that Marinette constantly daydreams to herself and tells herself that Adrien is her husband. Girl, GIRL YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW HIM VERY WELL. SHE’S NOT EVEN IN LOVE SHE’S JUST FASCINATED WITH THE IDEA OF HIM. Ugh this is why I don’t like the idea of Marinette and Adrien or Ladybug and Adrien being together. Like she barely knows him and she counts that as love. Jesus. Lmao Gorilla has and will always ship Marinette and Adrien together. You can not change my mind.

Brooo if Marinette had a penis she would definitely have gotten a boner when Adrien fell on her. WHY IS MARINETTE LIKE THIS?! (Ok yes if my crush not that I have one but if I did I would probably do all the shit she is doing but I wouldn’t run away I would fucking just be in shock and freeze. Probably idk. THIS IS GIVING ME TO MUCH SECOND HAND EMBARRASSMENT PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD ACT NORMAL FOR ONCE IN YOUR LIFE.) Did Alya just say that “New York is the most romantic place in the world!” AGAIN YOU LIVE IN PARIS!!! OH SHIT NVM. I paused it too soon. She continues by saying, “After Paris obviously.” Ok my bad. Ok are we talking about the same New York cause New York isn’t that romantic. Then again what do I know. Marinette FUCK YOU!!! YOU COULD HAVE SAT WITH ADRIEN AND NOW YOU HAVE TO SIT WITH THE FUCKING PRINCIPLE. Lmao this is giving me fucking Spider-Man Far From Home flashbacks. Bro Adrien looks so disappointed. FUCK YOU MARINETTE! Bro gorilla is such a mood. Putting a 10 for both having a fear of flying and for needing relaxation. Wait why doesn’t he have eyebrows? I just realized that. I mean I knew but like I didn’t realize idk if that makes sense.

Dude the principal sleeping on Marinette THAT HAPPENED IN FAR FROM HOME!!! Wait a damn minute in Far From Home Peter lives in New York and goes somewhere in Europe (I forgot where) AND MARINETTE LIVES IN FRANCE AND SHE GOES TO NEW YORK!!! Not only that but these are both superhero movies and they are both in love with someone except here Marinette is trying to get over Adrien while Peter Parker was trying to win over MJ. OK SOMEONE ON THE CREATIVE TEAM LITERALLY WATCHED FAR FROM HOME AND SAID YES LET’S DO THIS BUT THE OPPOSITE. I CAN’T THIS IS SO FUNNY!

AWWWW Alya and Nino sleeping on each other IS EVERYTHING!!! I SHIP THEM SO MUCH!!! IVAN AND MYLENE TOO!!! THEY REALLY WANT TO KILL ME HUH!? WAIT ROSE AND JUELKA FUCK YESSS THE GAYS ARE WINNING!!! MY MULTISHIPPER HEART CAN’T TAKE THIS MUCH POWER ALL IN A MATTER OF SECONDS!!! THIS IS BEAUTIFUL!!!

Dude I literally thought she said shit for a second I WAS LIKE WHAT?! But she said shoot. I really hope that’s not toilet water on her shirt. MARINETTE YOU HAVE A NAPKIN? OR TOILET PAPER ON YOUR HAIR?! GET THAT SHIT OUT OF THERE?!

Awww the sunset is so pretty. And Adrien is going to come in 3 2 1. Right on time. Adrien, “It's beautiful isn’t it?” I’m expecting Marinette to say, “Yeah but so are you.” and immediately regretting afterwards. Nvm she trips on him instead. Should have seen that coming. Ok now they are looking out the window again. This frame would be so cute if she didn’t have that stupid Toilet paper in her hair. Bruh Adrien just stands next to her and doesn’t even mention the Toilet paper on her hair. Adrien be like, “Yup just me and my fashionista friend Marinette looking at the window. Oh she has a piece of toilet paper in her hair. Damn must be a new trend I don’t know about. That’s kinda sus cause I am a model but whatever she knows more about fashion then I do so it’s all good.” (Not an actual quote.) Damn Alya and Nino ship them so much. Ok but what a mood!

Adrien says, “You're always willing to take a chance on something or someone even when no one else is.” Yeah bruh it’s because she is ladybug, I mean come on how do you not realize. Adrien really smirked at her whole shit! Adrien continues by saying, “You got something Marinette.” Marinette asks, “Something?” WAIT HOLD UP ISN’T HE DATING KAGAMI!!! WAIT IS MARINETTE A HOMEWRECKER!!! I’m kidding. Ok not really. Wait is Adrien a cheater like what?! Adrien continues by saying, “Yeah there in your hair.” He grabs the fucking piece of toilet paper. I LITERALLY FORGOT IT WAS THERE AND I BURST OUT LAUGHING!!! GOD I LOVE THIS MOVIE!!!

Alya is a mood, “I can’t decide if they are the cutest people I know or the most embarrassing.” Literally me whenever I watch Miraculous ladybug. Also this literally sounds like something fanfic Alya would say. Not canon Alya. But I really love how they let Alya say that. Good call team! Omg Nino continues with, “Yeah I love Adrien but he is like a baby chick that just started cracking out of his egg he has a hard time understanding the signals people send them.” THIS LITERALLY SOUNDS LIKE A FANFIC AND I LOVE IT!!! OMG!!! I LOVE OPERATION NEW YORK OMG!!! YESSSSSSSS!!! ALYA AND NINO ARE LITERALLY OUR SAVIORS!!! GOD DAMN I LOVE THEM!!! ADRIEN HUGGED HER AWWWWW!!! I LOVE HIM!

THERE’S ANOTHER SUPER VILLAIN WTF!!! He really wants to kill the people huh. I mean he must be pure evil cause he literally is tearing the airplane apart. He really said: There's tons of people in this airplane huh. Welp I really need this technology so I guess they have to die!

DUDE WHO THE FUCK IS THIS GIRL? I can’t tell if she is a robot or a superhero! MAYBE BOTH!!! ALYA IS SUCH A SUPERHERO NERD I LOVE HER!!! OK this other girl superhero is literally captain marvel. She’s not Majestia (idk if that’s how you spell it) nah she’s captain marvel. LMAO WHEN CAPTAIN MARVEL MAKES AN APPEARANCE IN THE MLB MOVIE AND DOESN’T HAVE THE AUDACITY TO HELP OUT PETER PARKER IN HIS FIELD TRIP!! DAMN!!! SHE REALLY SAID FUCK YOU PETER! MLB FANDOM NEEDS ME MORE THAT YOU DO!! LIKE GURL PETER IS HAVING AN EMOTIONAL BREAKDOWN CAUSE HIS 3rd father figure died!!! Then again she is saving an airplane fool of people but I’m sure you could have made a quick stop to give Peter some advice but whatever.

God I hate the principal.

CAPTAIN MARVEL REALLY SAID I HAVE TO SAVE MY ROBOT WIFE FROM THAT BOMB!! And she fucking blew the bomb away from her face. DUDE THERE IS SO MANY NEW SUPERHEROES HOLY CRAP!!! Ok including the Captain Marvel and the robot there’s 2 more but that’s more than Paris soooooo. WAIT CAPTAIN MARVEL JUST CALLED HER ROBOT DARLING!!! I was joking, I didn’t think they were together. OK I SHIP IT! Captain Marvel, “Are you alright darling?” (Giving me Spinderella and Netasha vibes not gonna lie) STOPPED IT TOO SOON!!! ROBOT JUST CALLED CAPTAIN MARVEL HER MOTHER!!! ABORT ABORT SHIP!!! I regret making all the comments that I just have made. So ignore them. I no longer ship them. Aw they have such a quote MOTHER AND DAUGHTER RELATIONSHIP!!! They are hugging each other. Adorable.

Bruh Adrien and Marinette are talking openly to plagg and tikki like could you guys be more obvious. Like shut up.

So apparently there’s a superhero for everything in USA. Um I wish if there was USA wouldn’t be as shitty as it is now.

I love Nino and Alya, that's all I’m going to say.

Also the superheros have a code word for the French students and it’s literally ‘the little croissants’ I LOVE THAT OMG!!! WHO CAME UP WITH THAT CODE CAUSE I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!”

Ok turns out Robot girl can actually turn into a regular girl. SO THAT’S COOL!

How is it possible that Adrien and Marinette can’t figure out how the doors work like what?! Ok why the fuck is Adrien constantly catching Marinette every time she falls. Like he isn’t even close to her and he fucking races and catches her. Right he obviously doesn’t like her. Yup I definitely believe that bullshit.

Lmao the robot girl took one look at dumbass Marinette and stupidass Adrien and said, “Those 2 are made for each other.” That’s so funny. Ok robot girl is friends with a girl that has some weird ass earrings (dare I say lesbian). And they both are in school so I’m pretty sure they are the same age. SO I SHIP THEM!!! Grumpy girlfriend and super happy robot girlfriend. ADORABLE!

Lmao they are already going to a party bruh. They just got off of a plane and they almost died. And you’re telling me that they aren’t slightly jet lagged or even a little tired. Bruh come on.

DAMN SABRINA IS GONNA GET A LOVE INTEREST OKKKKKKKK!!! He literally winked at her and she went bright red. DAMN GURL GET IT!!! CHLOE FUCK OFF!!! SABRINA IS GONNA GO FLIRT WITH THE GUY AND NOT BE YOUR STUPID ASSISTANT!!! FUCK YOU!!! GOD DAMNIT CHLOE, SABRINA, MARINETTE AND ALYA ARE ROOMATES BRUHHHHH!!! (And they were roommates- OH MY GOD THEY WERE ROOMMATES NOT NOW BRAIN PLEASE)

Bro the teacher looks at the hallway and nods cause she notices that all the lights are off in the room and no one is talking and she leaves. And immediately all the doors open and everyone is sneaking off to the party. BROOO THIS REMINDS ME OF NHI LOL!!! So the teacher suddenly pops out and asks what’s that noise and they all go into different rooms. The teacher doesn’t notice. And of course Marinette goes into the room with Adrien but on accident, and for a second I thought she was touching his pee pee but no she was just touching his lower stomach lol. They both look at each other and Marinette gets flustered and Adrien smiles softly at her. And she immediately gets away from him and they end up in the same room as ROBOT GIRL AND HER LESBIAN GIRLFRIEND!!! Robot girl is shipping them so hard while her girlfriend is glaring at them.

HER GIRLFRIEND CAN PLAY GUITAR YESSSSS!!!

SABRINA GO TO THE PARTY PLEASE!!! DITCH CHLOE!!! FLIRT WITH THE AMERICAN!!! THE AMERICAN IS FUCKING STANDING OUTSIDE THE WINDOW!!! WAITING FOR HER OMG!!! He takes her hand AND TAKES HER TO THE ROOF PARTY!!! FUCK I SHIP THEM SO HARD!!!

Omg the dialogue in this movie is fucking amazing. Marinette says, “Is it a bird?” Adrien, “Is it a plane?” Sabrina’s soon to be boyfriend, “No IT’S HOT DOG DAN!” Like bitch why is the hot dog cart flying like wtf?! Dude is this how French people see Americans because you know what?! THAT SOUNDS about right. If USA ever gets superhero’s we PROBABLY WOULD HAVE A SUPERHERO WHO SERVES FUCKING HOT DOGS!!! Damn this movie is pretty fucking realistic. The Americans are fucking thirsty for some hot dogs they literally run over Adrien and Marinette like damn ok yes a lot of Americans like hot dogs but we aren’t animals. Turns out the hot dogs are magical. ROSE LITERALLY GOT SUPER STRENGTH AND WAS ABLE TO LIFT UP IVAN!!! QUEEN!!! AW Sabrina got long ass hair like Rapunzel but it’s brown for some reason.

There’s 2 hot dogs left and Nino take initiative and pays for the hot dog and says, “Not a problem. My girl and I can have one and you 2 can have the other.” Damn this really is a fanfic huh. Then again I doubt a fanfic would have them sharing a fucking magical hot dog. Lol! This movie is nuts. They ate the hot dogs (nvm they took a bite of the hotdog and they dropped it on the floor) and they started floating. They grab hands and they are trying not to freak out.

Meanwhile ALYA AND NINO ALL THE FUCKING GET IS THESE HIGH PITCHED VOICES LIKE BRUH. Also Nino ships them so much omg! BRUH HOT DOG DAN EVEN SHIPS THEM! I mean he doesn’t say anything he just looks at them and smiles.

Omg Alya asked Robot’s girlfriend to set the mood with a song! And Robot’s girlfriend is like yeah sure thing. This movie is surreal.

THE SONG IS LITERALLY THE SONG THAT THEY DANCED TOO AT CHLOE’S PARTY OMG!!! I can’t believe I remembered that.

Bruh Adrien literally just repeated what I typed. HE JUST ASKED MARINETTE IF SHE COULD DANCE WITH HIM!!! They are floating and the moon is shining bright on them (Nice job Yue; setting the scene for us I see) and he extends his hand. She starts floating backwards cause she’s freaking out (What a surprise 😒). He grabs her hand and brings her closer to him. WHAT FANFIC AUTHOR WAS ABLE TO GET A FUCKING HIGH BUDGET TO MAKE THIS MOVIE BECAUSE THIS DOESNT FEEL LIKE AN MLB EPISODE!!!

ALSO Marinette is looking at Adrien in a way that makes her look like a Tim burton cartoon character lol. SHE FINALLY GIVES IN AND DANCES WITH HIM IN FRONT OF THE MOON!!! (They aren’t even dancing to be honest they are literally just hugging each other really closely and spinning) BUT ITS ADORABLE SO I FORGIVE THEM!

Lmao they zoom out of the roof party and you just see in the fucking corner Kim and some other dude having a push-up contest. They showed that in the beginning when Alya, Nino, Marinette and Adrien were entering the party. I just wasn’t expecting that in this whole time Kim and the other guy still continued the push-up contest omg. (This is the first 29 minutes and my hand is tired sooo I’m not gonna write anymore)

If anyone wants me to continue I will but I doubt anybody is going to see this post so yeah! Anyway if someone actually read this PROPS TO YOU DUDE!!! HOPE I DIDNT WASTE YOUR TIME!!! HAVE A GOOD YEAR!!!

Edit: I think Robot girl and girl with weird earrings are sisters soooooo I don’t ship them anymore. (I’m honestly really confused are they siblings or not?!)

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offtopicoverload · 3 years

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Enchanted Husband headcanons no one asked for, but no one ever asks for any of the shit i do sooooo

- The dynamic is very much Marco starting shit, Ty enthusiastically joining in, Zeke just kinda vibing along, while Carter scolds them and Yasmin just shakes her head asdhjfkjgd

- In this AU, they know each other through a club

- Carter runs it with a cousin’s friend he knows and bartends a lot, Ty works there some nights as a waitress, Zeke’s a bouncer, and maybe Yasmin’s performed there in the past or something?

- Marco was actually brought in cuz they grew up with Ty

- Ty was joking about Yasmin needing someone to back her up when Yasmin was actually open to the idea, which got her curious

- Ty successfully enlisted Zeke cuz she knew he played a lot, though Carter took some once she learned he could play piano

- Needed a guitarist, which was perfect for Marco showing up one night

- So I feel like they all clashed a lot at first, just cuz they have such different taste in music

- Like Zeke’s into classic rock and that sort of thing, just grew up on it and never clicked with anything else in the way car rides with his dad did

- Carter likes softer stuff, classical for pretty piano, and older stuff. Probably Beatles and jazz and blues type of thing

- Ty’s into a ton- 90s rnb from when she was a kid and thats all her sister listened to, punk cuz she fell into the scene as a teenager, rap (especially female artists, that’ll come up later) cuz it goes so hard

- Marco will listen to anything, but I feel like they are secretly into pop and get made fun of obsessing over Ariana Grande

- Yasmin’s obviously into indie, but I feel like some pop too? idk im bad at this

- So they bickered a lot until they came to the conclusion that they can just… do whatever, they don’t have to stick to a rigid genre or anything

- I can’t see Carter performing that much, idk. I feel like he handles management stuff and helps with a lot of the writing

- Zeke can’t write for shit and doesn’t even try, he just kinda hangs out when they’re brainstorming and makes jokes with Marco

- Only Yasmin and Carter have access to the social media accounts, they don’t trust the other three (tho Yasmin says it’s just cuz she likes doing it all)

- I wanna say that Zeke came up with the band name, which surprised everyone

- They were trying to agree on something, there were several notepads with scratched out names laying around as they drank and laid around Ty’s apartment, when Zeke just sits up and goes, “Enchanted Husband”

- Everyone was very confused until Ty started yelling “The POWER that holds!!!” then they were on board

- Marco and Ty were obviously super close already, they grew up next door to each other and spent so many afternoons messing around

- Carter had a pretty formal relationship with Ty, Zeke, and Yasmin, but no one else really knows each other

- So Ty hosts bonding nights where they drink and take turns picking movies to watch, and talk and just become friends

- Mainly cuz I want them to all legit be friends and hang out cuz I love that for them

- They go out a lot, or Zeke, Ty, and Carter spend breaks together

- By the time of the fic, they’ve known each other for three years or so?

- They played local for a while, just covers until they actually managed some writing

- Audience slowly grew and they made an EP, self-produced

- But it took a crazy amount of time and was mostly Carter trying to teach himself between shifts at the club

- His cousin’s friend ends up stepping back, leaving him with even more responsibilities, so they have to find a producer

- Enter Briar lmaooo

- I won’t spoil what I’ve got planned and written, but I will say that Marco introduces themselves as “Marco Linguini” and nearly starts a fight

- And now back to Ty’s taste in music

- She loves female rappers and how much empowerment they have, she eats that shit up asfdfg

- When WAP came out, she would not stop shrieking the lyrics at the top of her lungs, Marco constantly joining in

- Eventually Zeke learns the lyrics and starts singing too, to the overwhelming joy of Ty

- Yasmin starts humming under her breath after a few days, and it’s taking everything within Carter not to join too, just out of how catchy it is adjhkjfs

- Moral of the story, I made three dumbasses and an exhausted dad join a canon character in a found family and I’m in love with it

#ty richards #marco lina #carter tenadii #zeke cly #i just really like this group of idiots

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ispiderdudei · 4 years

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Only-part five

prologue part one part two part three part four part five

dad! Tom Holland x OC

only masterlist

my masterlist

Summary: Tom was living his dream as a rising star in Hollywood for the past six years. Even though it was everything he ever wanted he missed everything that he left behind. His family back in London. His best friend who’s career had also taken off and though they were roomates they never had time for one another. His first love that was torn apart by a dumbass decision. He wished he could take it all back. All the stupid decisions he made in the past that could have been the other way around if he choose the right choice. What happens when he wakes up one day in the life he should have chosen?

warnings: nervous Tom, kinda fluff, Blythe being a smol bean, um yeah that's about it

word count: 3289

authors note: I feel like everyone of these I have an excuse on why I'm late to post. Well, it’s because I’m a senior in high school who has to apply to a million scholarships so I don't have to worry about student loans, but I’ll survive:) I also am taking three college classes and ironically English is the one that is killing me. I thank you for your patiences and wish me luck. Idk when the next part will come out but don't worry it’s happening. Also you know, just feel free to send me an ask anytime like I don’t mind (PSA this is my favorite look ever pic is definitely not mine)

After Blythe’s little incident and a good ten minutes of Lennon tending to her daughters small wounds they finally were able to calm her down before making their way back to the party. Tom was still overwhelmed by what happened earlier and it made every worse case scenario run through his mind. It was mostly about how he imagined Lennon finding out. The more he thought about telling her the more he backtracked his plan all together. Tom wasn’t going to tell her today. He knew that for sure, but that didn’t mean he could wait forever. Tom didn’t know exactly how this scenario would play out but he really didn’t want to at the least. He didn’t want Lennon to hate him and he also didn’t want her to act like she forgave him automatically.

He decided he needed to find the right opportunity because that’s what is best for everyone. He needed to wait it out because he still didn’t know if it was permanent, so why would he jeopardize it. If Blythe had come in a few moments later he would be hating himself even more. No matter how much he wondered if Lennon's lips were still as sensational as he remembered them to be. Another part of him wondered if he felt guilty just being so close to having an intimate moment with her how much more of that would build up inside of him.

Lennon brushes the curls out of her daughter's hair one last time before giving her a soft smile, “Are you going to be okay now?” The girl sniffed and nodded watching her mother stand up. Lennon turned to Tom giving him a sorrowful look and it made him panic even more because he knew what it was for.

Lennon and Tom grabbed the food while Blythe trailer behind them as they all walked back outside. Tom noticed more people than he did before, but that was because he just wasn’t paying attention earlier when he walked in with Xio. He saw many faces familiar, new, and old. It made his mind wonder on how the hell he was going to converse with them and still take on the persona of this other Tom. It was easier for him to talk to Harrison and Xio because they knew it wasn’t him. It wasn’t easy to talk with Lennon, but he was comfortable in the small conversations they have had so far.

“Can I go back to playing,” Blythe asked her mother in a more chipper mood looking at a few kids that Tom didn’t recognize.

Lennon nodded looking down at her. Blythe smiled rushing over to them stumbling a little. “Be careful please,” Lennon yelled at her letting out a sigh, “That child is a spitting image of you, I swear.”

Tom looked at Lennon shaking his head, “She’s a hundred percent you.” He meant every word their daughter was definitely a copy Lennon from the short time Tom knew her. Blythe didn’t have to do much to tell Tom that she was Lennon’s daughter because she was so much like her. He didn’t have to think about the fact that she had the same physical features as him but her mannerisms were like her mother’s.

Tom couldn’t remember much from his childhood. Well, he couldn’t remember some things, but he did remember Lennon. She was always so happy and full of energy. She never seemed to slow down and kept him on his toes when he was around her. When something sad would happen she would be back to herself in no time. Blythe proved that to Tom just mere seconds ago when she was a mess and then went straight to her task before she got hurt. It was almost scary how much their personalities were almost the same.

Lennon just scoffed at Tom rolling her eyes, “You only say that because you’re too stubborn to realize she is a girl version of you.”

“You can’t tell me that child who is stopping to pick the dandelion to make a wish is mini me,” Tom asked as he watched the five-year old stopped dead in her tracks looking down at the weed before picking it up and holding it tightly with one hand squeezing her eyes shut as the children rush pass her before blowing it out with the biggest smile on her face.

Lennon let out a laugh, “Well, I remember both of us doing that if I do recall.”

Tom smiled softly, “I’m glad I did because most of my wishes came true.” Well not exactly for him but the other him. You’ve learned by now Tom has always had the biggest crush on Lennon no matter how much he didn’t want to admit it. Lennon liking him back was a shock and he never expected her to return the feelings no matter how many times Haz told him to grow a pair and ask her out. She was too perfect for him

Lennon gave him a sly smile rolling her eyes, “You were always one for cheese Tom.”

Tom shrugged, “What can I say?

“Ah, Thomas, nice to see you not overthinking things,” a thick Irish accent said behind him making the hairs on the back of his neck. Tom knew it anywhere because it was one he had to reason with when was dating Lennon and to be honest it still gave him anioxty to this day.

The funny thing about Lennon’s father, Alex, is that he is the living embodiment of James Bond, Pierce Brosnan’s version, of course. One of his most fond memories of Lennon’s father is when Lennon, him, and Harrison went to see Mamma Mia in the Cinema. He took Lennon home after and he was face to face with the man when walking her to the door swearing he would break out into a song by ABBA at any given moment, or run off with some Meryl Streep doppelgänger to Kalokairi. He would never do that to his wife though. They were far too in love.

It wasn’t that Tom enjoyed Lennon’s father’s company it’s just something you don’t exactly need when you have everything else running through your mind. Having to deal with the man he had been afraid of since he started dating Lennon wasn’t at the top of his list. He respected the man as much as he did his own father, but he knew that in his old life the man probably hated his guts. Tom won’t blame him for it because he would only blame himself. Hell, he already did.

Tom let out a nervous laugh that didn’t have to be forced because his he was so anxious he was scared Alex would sense something off about him because it has happened many times before. The man was like a bloodhound on a search for its owners next game while on an afternoon hunt. “Well I am trying. Being laid back was a goal I have for the new year of my life.”

Lennon's father took a sip of his drink before winking and pointing at Tom mere seconds after the glass left his lips. “That’s always been a good goal of yours. Glad you are finally living up to it.”

“Awe, come on dad, Tom has already been doing that,” Lennon beamed looking at her husband making Tom give her a timid smile. Alex gave him a look that Tom has seen before.

He was having serious déjà vu and it wasn’t the good kind. It was like a happier version of the memory before and Tom was slightly scared. The memory was when Tom asked for her father to approve him asking Lennon for his hand in marriage. They were never engaged when they called things off but Tom wanted to do it so desperately.

It was at a dinner party Nikki decided to hold for something Tom couldn’t quite remember, but he did at the time. It was only them and a few family friends nothing too special; him and Lennon were a few months into their relationship that still felt surreal to Tom.

He knew he needed to talk to Alex and he was scared out of his mind. He feared rejection the most because he knew the man hardly trusted him when he was just friends with his daughter. Lennon was off with Xio and a few other girls that were invited and Tom took the chance. He saw him standing on the porch talking to his father and knew it was now or never.

Taking a deep breath he walked over to the tall Irishman trying his best to not stumble and fall on his face while on the way to ask the man the question that will change his future. As he approached closer Tom had second thoughts but he tried his hardest to hide them so it wouldn’t get the best of him. He was sticking to his plan no matter how much he wanted to not ask all together.

Alex noticed Tom approaching upon first glance and gave him a smile. Tom looked between the two men giving them both a nod while putting his hands in his pockets.

“Lennon leaves you alone for a couple of minutes and you don’t know what to do, am I right Thomas?” Alex said smiling down at him earning a laugh from Dominic.

Tom smiled nervously, “Uh, no, actually I came over here to talk to you about something. I hope I’m not interrupting anything.”

“Not at all,” Alex reassured him, “This old man was just getting a good point around about London’s traffic laws.”

Dominic shook his head, “I’m sure we can continue our political debate later. Perhaps over another game of golf. I can play easier so I don’t win.”

“I think that’s how you play naturally Holland,” Alex playfully said back earning a laugh from Dominic.

Tom’s father looked towards the kitchen at his mother who was motioning for some assistance from him and let out a site tucking his hands in his pockets, “I suppose the spouse is calling me. Perfect timing for you, Tom.” He gave both his son and Alex a nod before walking off.

Tom gulped, he hoped it wasn’t noticeable to the man standing in front of him because if he knew how terrified he was there was no telling on what he was going to say in their next conversation.

Alex slung his arm around tom’s shoulder patting letting out a chuckle, “Your father is something Thomas. Maybe that's why I like you so much.” It was something said so simple, but it gave Tom a spark of hope and eased his nerves at the thought of Lennon’s father liking him. “Now, my boy, what is it you need to talk to me about,” Alex asked as he lead tom to a secluded part of the Holland’s yard stopping looking down at him as he waited patiently for Tom to speak.

Tom stood a little taller than normal adjusting his jacket as he tried to relax his shoulders, “I, uh… well sir you are well aware I have liked your daughter for a while. Even before we were dating.”

Alex narrowed his eyes at Tom. It wasn’t out of anger, no, far from it. He was doing it because it seemed he was trying to piece together at what Tom was getting at. Alex is an intelligent intellectual that can seem to figure things out quickly and it usually was a problem or a person that he was able to solve. Tom, however, was scared to say anything before the man spoke. He felt like he was constantly trying to impress the man. “I’m well aware of you’re infatuation for my daughter, yes. You two have been dating for a while I hope you’d at least expect me to notice.”

Tom’s eyes widened, “O-of course, Sir. I had no doubt that you are i-in-informed of Lennon and I.”

The man let out another deep throat chuckle, “Now Thomas, you don’t need to act nervous around me we’ve known each other for quite some time and I think it's only fitting for you to not stress so much around me.”

But that was the thing, everything that was going through Tom’s mind at the moment was making him nervous. What he was doing could make or break him and Lennon’s relationship. He was scared shittless to say the least. He cleared his throat hoping years of acting school and control of his voice could help him the situation he was in, “Well, you see, what I’m going to ask might.”

“What would that mean,” Alex asked his voice laced in concern. It caught tom by surprise. It only made tom’s mind wonder to Alex thinking the worst-case scenario. “Is there something you need to tell me Thomas.”

It was that look.

Tom let out a nervous laugh, “I guess I said that wrong and can see where you are interpreting what I’m saying as something negative, but I promise it's not.”

The olderman placed his hands on his hips, “Well go on.”

Tom took a deep breath, “Well let me start out by saying I love your daughter more than anything. I think she is breathtaking and her flaws are just as beautiful as her perfections. Lennon has taught me how to stay grounded through everything and has given me more second chances than I could count. She is amazing and has this presents about her that makes me want to know than I already do about her. Even our relationship started as friends she is always proving that she is the one that I’ve always wanted to have a life with as I grow older. I know your gonna say we are too young and that I’m crazy for even thinking you’d say yes. And believe me I have prepared myself for your rejection-”

“Yes.”

Tom didn’t even processes Alex’s reactions. “I just want you to know that I’m not going to stop asking, because I know she is my future. Not some stupid movie deal or another musical opportuinity… What?”

“Yes, Thomas you have my blessing.”

“You’re serious.”

“I can take it back if you like and say no,” Alex state bluntly.

“No!” Tom said a little too loudly making some of the people close to them turn to the sudden raise of his voice. He cleared his throat, “No. I uh- I just- I didn’t think that would work out so well.”

“For Christ sakes,Thomas, don’t tell me you have flashcards prepared.”

Tom let out another laugh, “Something like that yeah.”

Alex rolled his eyes, “You try too hard. I do trust you, Thomas, because Lennon trust you. Do I think I’m crazy for approving for my daughter to marry so young? Yes, but I rather it be with you than some son of a bitch that I know wasn’t good for her.” He looked over Tom’s shoulder and smiled.

“Hi dad,” he heard from behind him, “Tommy.” The two men didn’t say anything. “Did I interrupt something?” Lennon raised an eyebrow before intertwining her fingers with Tom.

“Not a thing Lennonbug,” Alex said smiling at his daughter proudly before giving the same look to Tom.

This was everything he wanted.

However, he didn’t want to think about the look Alex was giving him right now, “How have you been improving Thomas?”

Tom’s palms were sweaty as Lennon gripped his arm. This wasn’t him being scared shitless asking her father to marry her. This was him being scared shitless on what to say to the man in front of him in an opposite way. “Just… going with the flow…” Tom mentally cursed himself because he would never say that.

Both of them gave Tom an odd look before looking at each other. Before either one of them could speak on Tom’s choice of words the voice of Nikki came from the front porch, “Okay everyone lunch is ready. Let’s hurry and eat before Harry dies of starvation.” Before everyone could trample over to the plastic table outside that was filled with a full buffet Nikki stopped them, “But before we do so we should congratulate Tom for achieving all that he has. I’m proud of you for blessing me with the two most adorable children and the best daughter in law a mother could ask for.”

Tom smiled at his mother nodding in appreciation placing a hand on Lennon’s back. “Thanks Mum,” there was a slight pause as if everyone expected him to say something else, “What are we all standing around for let’s eat, I’m famished.”

The guests cheered before making there way to the table. Blythe ran up to Tom grabbing a hold of his had pulling him towards the crowd of people waiting in line, “Come on Daddy we need to hurry up if you want to get something to eat.”

Lennon laughed at the little girl, “Hang on little bird we need to wait for our turn. There are still going to be quite a bit of food left by we get to the table.” She turned to Tom, I’m going to get Eli and make sure you don’t put too much on her plate. We don’t need the incident we had at the twins party. As for you,” she turned to her daughter, “ You need to at least have a few vegetables on your plate if you want any cake.”

“Okay, Mummy,” Blythe let out another annoyed groan tugging Tom’s had more. Making him

practically stumble to the line of family and friends.

The party unfolded like any other everyday gathering with Tom able to avoid questions his brothers threw at him throughout lunch. Most of which were covered by Xiomara, and the slight uncomfort he felt when Lennon got up to go get something from the kitchen didn’t help his current situation.

Just when Tom thought he couldn’t bare his siblings grilling him about his current life a sense of relief came over him as the voice of Lennon came through the back door. Her smile was as bright as the glow of the candles lit brightly on the cake she was holding. Her voice carried the familiar tune as everyone else around him began to sing happy birthday.

Lennon set the cake down in front of him, placing a hand on his shoulder making him tense up. He made sure to not flinch so much. Being put in a situation that might make everything go away the next day made Tom start to panic. What was he supposed to do in this situation? Everyone tuning into the song with their gaze on him. Blythe plopping down next to Tom leaning over looking in awe at the pastry in front of her father.

“Make sure you wish for something good daddy,” The little girl whispered as the short song came to an end. He knew that but what the hell was he supposed to wish for. She looked over at him with her doe eyes, “Can I blow them out with you?”

Tom gave her a tight smile nodded allowing her to slide into his lap as everyone huddled around them. Tom shut his eyes and told himself to just live in the moment. With Blythe’s weight shifting in his lap and the feeling of Lennons hand on his shoulder this moment couldn’t have been more perfect. He couldn’t wish for this life to last but he could just let it temporarily engulf him with happiness.

That was his wish to just see what happens next with what could have been.

taglist: @let-me-luve-you @lemondropirwin @afterglowparker @underooshields @mybitchborky @theamuz

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brynnmck · 4 years

Text

Tagged by @agirlnamedkeith, @pretty--thief, and @samirant, thank you! <333

What is the colour of your hairbrush? Mostly black, with a green ring on it.

Name a food you never eat: I have quite a few foods I can’t eat anymore thanks to some random health issues I developed a few years back (friends, aging is great from a mental/emotional perspective, Not Great from a physical perspective) but in terms of voluntary stuff, green peppers. I’ve outgrown a lot of my childhood food dislikes but that one is in my SOUL.

Are you typically too warm or too cold? Too cold, definitely.

What were you doing 45 minutes ago? I was in a boring meeting!

What’s your favourite candy bar? Probably Snickers? I really like 100 Grand too, though. And Butterfinger. And Twix. And I want Claire Saffitz to make all of them for me.

Have you ever been to a professional sports game? I’ve been going to Major League baseball games since I was a kid (it was my dad’s favorite sport), and the past few years, I’ve been to 20-30 games a season. I usually go for my birthday, too, which is in a couple of weeks, and it’s just kinda sinking in that there will be no birthday baseball for me this year. :(

What was the last thing you said out loud? Just saying hi to my husband.

What is your favourite ice cream? Coffee Heath Bar Crunch. I can’t have caffeine anymore so this summer I’m gonna try to make a decaf version for myself. (WHY IS ALMOST ALL COFFEE ICE CREAM CAFFEINATED. There are so many reasons people can’t have caffeine! Sigh.)

What was the last thing you had to drink? Water!

Do you like your wallet? Sure? It’s a nice blue and it holds my stuff.

What was the last thing you ate? Fruit and Greek yogurt for breakfast.

Did you buy any new clothes last weekend? I didn’t! I actually ordered a couple of soft bras from TomboyX on Monday, but nothing on the weekend.

What’s the last sporting event you watched? A replay of an old Mariners game a couple of nights ago. If we’re talking live sports, I watched about half of a Korean baseball league game a few nights back, which was delightful.

What is your favourite flavour of popcorn? Butter!

Who is the last person you sent a text message to? @ajoblotofjunk

Ever go camping? Not in a long time. My husband has been getting the urge to go lately, though, so maybe we will!

Do you take vitamins? I take supplements due to the aforementioned health issues. And vitamin B.

Do you go to church every Sunday? Lol no. My mother is very Catholic and she brought us to 6 am Mass every weekday when I was a kid. It was well-intentioned (her dad had a pretty volatile temperament and she always felt safe at church, so she subconsciously wanted us to feel the same way) but it did not sell me on the experience! Heh.

Do you have a tan? I live in the Seattle area and it’s May, so... lol no. I’m also pretty pale so I don’t get that tan anyway, but. I usually get a little something going in the summer, enough to have tan lines anyway.

Do you prefer Chinese food or pizza? Tough call, but I’m going with pizza.

Do you drink your soda through a straw? I don’t drink soda anymore (though I drink a LOT of carbonated water), but I’ll drink my drink through a straw if I get it at a fast-food place. Otherwise I don’t usually use one.

What colour socks do you usually wear? Most of my winter socks for work are black. Otherwise it’s a pretty random selection of colors.

Do you ever drive above the speed limit? Sure. Usually 5-10 miles over, rarely more (or less) than that.

What terrifies you? Climate change. Global pandemics. You know. Just generally suffering (both mine and other people’s).

Look to your left. What do you see? Through window of the room I’m sitting in: my neighbors’ house, and a cherry tree in their yard.

What chore do you hate most? Cleaning the bathrooms.

What do you think of when you hear an Australian accent? The hot Australian woman who’s been on Gold Rush recently, or a dear fannish friend of mine I haven’t talked to in years who is actually from New Zealand and I KNOW IT’S VERY DIFFERENT but it’s close enough to make me think of her!

What’s your favourite soda? I used to drink a lot of Diet Mountain Dew. I really miss ginger beer, too. I love a good spicy ginger beer. Root beer too.

Do you go in a fast food place or just hit the drive-thru? Drive-thru all the way. Isn’t that part of the advantage of fast food?

What’s your favourite number? I don’t really have one!

Who’s the last person you talked to? My husband!

Favourite cut of beef? Boneless ribeye. I finally bought a propane grill a couple of years back and I have now learned to make a badass steak, if I say so myself.

Last song you listened to? Eve 6 - Inside Out. A few months ago I suddenly remembered that this song existed and so I bought it and now I have to listen to it at least twice every time it comes up, ha.

Last book you read? An as-yet-unpublished Rose Lerner novel, because I am very lucky! (It’s a wlw Gothic. SUCH A GOOD CONCEPT.)

Favourite day of the week? Saturday

Can you say the alphabet backwards? In this economy??? Idk, I could probably figure it out, but it would definitely be work.

How do you like your coffee? I love a caramel macchiato, especially iced so you get those weird globules of caramel coming up through the straw. But a nonfat decaf double latte with a little bit of some kind of syrup is my go-to these days--hot when it’s cold out, iced when it’s warm out.

Favourite pair of shoes? I have these 40s-ish heels that tie over your instep with a little bow and I love them. I also have some extremely cool red velvet with black cording peep-toe Louboutins that I bought off some discount site years ago, except I can’t wear them for long because they’re about a half size too small. But they’re SO PRETTY.

Time you normally get up? In isolation, I’m discovering that my natural sleep schedule is about 2 am - 10 am. But I have a daily meeting at 9:30, and I try to get my workout done before that, so I get up at 8-8:30ish. I am discovering through this meme that SO MANY of you are morning people! What is that like???

Sunrises or sunsets? I love sunrises but I am not remotely a morning person, so. I see a lot more sunsets, and I love them too!

How many blankets are on your bed? Just one duvet.

Describe your kitchen plates. We have some with blue perimeters and kind of a white/oatmeal middle that we inherited from my in-laws, and the ones we actually bought on purpose are white on top and either sage-y green or charcoal black on the bottom.

Describe your kitchen at the moment. Somewhat messy, or at least there are dishes to do. I made some pretty epic cauliflower mushroom risotto with shrimp last night, though, so it was for a good cause.

Do you have a favourite alcoholic drink? Perfect Manhattans with rye are my go-to, or a Quebecois, which is basically a perfect Manhattan with a little bit of maraschino liqueur added (and ideally a lemon twist, though we’re usually too lazy for those). In the summer, I’m getting really into gin these days: either gin and tonic, gin and some kind of citrus spiked seltzer, or a Last Word. I also really love a good craft beer, and sparkling wine too.

Do you play cards? Not really. We used to play a shit ton of gin rummy in high school, but I haven’t really played cards much since.

What colour is your car? Blue!

Do you know how to change a tire? Theoretically yes, though the one time I actually tried to do it myself, I had a hell of a time getting the lug nuts off. I was fortunately in my driveway at the time (good place for a flat tire!) and my neighbors kept coming by and offering to help, and I was like NO I WANNA DO IT. I think I did need help eventually, though. Stupid pneumatic tools at tire installation places!

Your favourite state? That rare, usually-brief phase of writing where everything seems to fit and flow and you’re a genius and you understand all the secrets of the cosmos. Also Washington.

Favourite job you’ve had? My current one. It’s not my dream job, but it pays well and I like my team and I get to learn new stuff fairly often and I can work from home in the midst of all this, so. I am very lucky!

How did you get your biggest scar? The summer after my freshman year of college, I was part of a summer stock theatre troupe, and we performed half the summer at my college, and half the summer in a very small town in eastern Oregon that had an outdoor stage. One of my entrances involved running over the grass to get to the stage, and one night the grass was wet, and my costume involved ballet slippers, and I slipped and fell onto the stage stairs in front of the whole audience. It hurt SO MUCH that I got very light-headed onstage while I was trying to get through the scene, lol. Anyway, my costume also involved harem pants that had elastic around the calf/ankle area, and I got a friction burn from those, which ended up scarring because the skin over your shins is very thin! (I also got a few massive bruises on my leg that didn’t go away for weeks, so eventually my mom nagged me into going to the doctor, who promptly started gently hinting to see if my boyfriend at the time was responsible for the injuries. Which was actually pretty cool of the doctor! But then I was like, lol no, trust me, a hundred people saw me bite it, this is 100% dumbass mistake.) And that’s my scar story.

Tagging, if you want to do it: @ajoblotofjunk, @snowymary, @halcyon-red, @it-may-be-dull-but-im-determined, @unadulteratedkr, and anyone else who feels like doing this!

#meme me

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dhiatzs · 4 years

Photo

I wanted to post a drawing about Sorcerio and Odval but I went into a whole speech about them in the post and I didn’t want it to stay hidden so I guess that I’ll publish it first lmao

Please, if anyone meet me IRL one day, don’t get me started about Sorcerio and Odval because like their relationship and individual personalities and development gives me so much genuine fun and delight that I could go on about them for hours. Everytime I watch Disenchantment is for them both and Luci, among other reasons.

Not only are they unashamed gay/bi/pan (probably bi/pan I guess?) fellas living their best life in the castle, hiding things from the king about their unusual rituals while serving the crown,

Not only are they also very different and independent one from the other (Sorcerio is a comic relief, magician, lunatic, but also quite useful character and idk the whole season 1 episode 8 where it’s seriously implied that he literally made love with a griffon??? To help her with her specie?? How random and cool is that??

I think he’s just literally my favorite character, with Luci. He’s at the peak of chaotic dumbass and I live for this dynamic) (while Odval is way more functional and knowing what he does, close to the king, the typical “oh no, not him” main character’s chaperone, but having hilarious lines and unexpected chill/funny times which make him even more likeable somehow?)

Like look at them??

Odval "i can deal with shits" and Sorcerio "awkward gay panic wtf is going on how do I talk again" are literally my life

(and also a good representation of my two braincells)

Not only do they have... kind of a potential of charadevelopment...? I mean, idk, what we saw from the end of Part II already sets up things to come about Odval, but it’s quite interesting to wonder what is going to happen to Sorcerio as well. Does Sorcerio even know the least about what Odval is up to? Did they talk about the whole taking-the-crown plan? Or is Odval acting in the biggest secret and whatever relationship he’s having with Sorcerio does not take a role in this? And I mean by that that Sorcerio wouldn’t know shit about what is going on inside Odval’s head.

And honestly? The second possibility is the most probable, given that Sorcerio doesn’t seem to care about taking power or the crown at all, while Odval is clearly ambitious. Sorcerio only cares about doing wizard stuff and his job, kinda, as far as I read him. Sure, it’s possible that Odval ruling the kingdom, Sorcerio could have a place and decide to betray the king as well, but he never seemed to participate in Odval’s dark plans. The time we see him join Odval in his cabinet? He’s panicking about not being a good wizard, about being a fraud. Sorcerio literally gives 0 shit about ruling the kingdom and I fucking love that.

And all of this, the whole “Odval is acting by himself to take the crown and Sorcerio knows nothing about that” possibility, is feeling good, kinda? Because it means that whatever Odval is up to, he doesn’t use Sorcerio to get there. Their sex relationship, nevermind if it’s something they are committed into or not, is not something resting on manipulations or their mutual wish to take away the crown. It’s something they do for genuine feelings/needs and idk, I like the idea? That Odval wouldn’t need Sorcerio, neither use him, but still does his plans on one hand, and still got this relationship with him on the other hand.

Not only their relationship isn’t only sex, like... they’re friends too, right? I mean, as friends as lovers, boyfriends, husbands or idk can be. Which means kind of besties. Sex friends, committed partner, polylovers, idk what relationship they precisely have one with the other but it looks like something healthy???? I’m saying that a lot lmao but Sorcerio and Odval and their ship/couple gives me oxygen.

Not only ALL of the above, but... they are old. They are not particularly attractive to all the audience, but they get to have this relationship, this feel-good, and this is the kind of relationship goals and happy life I need for characters who are not filling the attractiveness expectations. Because not young/not pretty people also deserve love and a sex life, and not only this “Up” soft romance where the both of the characters are living their domestic life, monogamous and heterosexual. Any kind of love and sex life.

This turned pretty damn quick into a “Sorcerio and Odval are the best” rant, but I have 0 regret lmao

#disenchantment #disenchantment odval #disenchantment sorcerio #sorcerio #odval #sorcerio and odval #netflix disenchantment #zog #luci #disenchantment spoilers

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draculaurennn · 4 years

Note

PRERELATIONSHIP -Liona General – Cullida Love – McJunk Domestic Life - Fuujiro

S— SHIP QUESTIONS @silverblighted

PRE-RELATIONSHIP — Liona .

How did they first meet? Siona was locked in a crumbling temple under the deserts sands and best girl Nova found her! And then Link and Gan cornered them like 10 minutes after they escaped.

What was their first impression of each other? For like 5 min Link thought she was actually tricking them that she wasn’t an evil mage, and then she passed out, and he was like “ok maybe not.” Siona’s first impression was like 2 hours later when she woke back up and she thought he was really nice!

Did any of their friends or family want them to get together? Link’s fam really did not! But Siona’s only family is Nova and she did.

Who felt romantic feelings first? Uhhhh... I think technically Siona did, but only because she thought meeting a prince like that is really romantic and was probably just projecting that ideal on him a little bit. But either way they’re both idiots smitten within 24 hours so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Did either of them try to resist their feelings? Siona does, a few times. She does because she has to go home, she does because she thinks she has to return to the Twilight Realm alone, and she does because she doesn’t think the way her story is playing out that she’ll be allowed to stay with Link. I think Link probably did for like one week and then decided it’s not worth it to try resisting people you care deeply about.

If you had told one of them that the other would be their soulmate, what would they think? asdfghjhgfd this one’s so hard UHHHHHH i think Link would think that’s pretty fuckin swell and makes sense if it goes hand in hand with finding a lost princess in the desert, and i think Siona would say that’s not a thing but she’d be super jazzed bc she’s an idiot romantic too.

GENERAL — Cullida .

Who initiated the relationship, and how did it go? It’d ultimately be left up to Cullen, I think. I think Cressida wouldn’t have been afraid to tell him she was waiting on him to tell her when he was ready, but I don’t think she would have ever pushed it after that. So it was probably Cullen, and it was probably right after her dumb ass almost died after Haven. Went great, though, even if she was groggy and turned around. Cressida would have probably told him it was about time LOL

Did they have an official first date? If so, what was it like? As official as you can get when you’re in the Inquisition, I guess. I don’t even know if they count things as dates? Just nice outings with each other away from their jobs and duties. More than likely it was a nice trip to a lake to sit and chat and have a picnic and not worry about busy places and other people.

What was their first kiss like? Their technical first kiss is in the alternate reality nightmare with Dorian, and Cressida tried kissing a red lyrium-corrupted Cullen to get through to him. For her, that was a first, but it was awful, and not even in their reality, so it doesnt really count. Their actual first kiss was in Haven right before she ran off to help Vesta, bc I think they were both pretty sure they were just doing to die there LOL.

Were they each other’s first anything (kiss, relationship, etc.)? Cressida is Cullen’s first-pretty-much-everything. I guess technically Cullen is Cressida’s first (and only) husband, which she’s pretty glad about.

What’s their height difference? Age difference? Cullen’s about a foot taller than Cressida, and nine years her senior.

What’s their relationship with each other’s families? Cressida’s family is... almost totally horrible. Her dad is dead, so no relation for Cullen there, and her mother is a monster of a woman who abused the hell out of her sister. Vesta is awkward with Cullen but I think she’s grown to like him over time. (Not enough to tell him, but enough to be supportive I think LOL). They’re cordial enough and can be in a room alone, even if they don’t talk a lot. Cullen’s family is so many sisters and a brother, and they all love Cressida. Cressida was panicked to meet them; she doesn’t panic meeting anyone, but she was really worried they wouldn’t like her bc she doesn’t think she, as a genuine person, is a likable person. She was also worried they’d think she was too pompous and shallow because she just doesn’t do field work. But they really like her bc she’s earnest and forthright and tries, even if she’s awful at menial field tasks. And they joke she’s too pretty for Cullen, so that’s always a plus.

Who takes the lead in social situations? Cressida. Hands down. It’s what she’s good at, it’s what she lives for, and it probably annoys some people that she has to open her mouth, but she commands a situation very well and in her mind, that’s how it should be. Cullen’s p fine w that though bc he doesn’t love social situations and he’d rather do his own job and be left alone.

Who gets jealous easier? Uhhh, probably Cullen. Cress doesn’t make that easy for him bc she’s flirty and commanding and winds people around her fingers to get her way. I think there’s been a few times early on where he wasn’t even sure she genuinely liked him or not bc she can pay fake attention and admiration so convincingly even to people she doesn’t like. Cressida’s also... like, so obnoxiously confident in her own outward personality but also so incredibly convinced by how much Cullen loves her (once she knows) that I don’t think she ever worries about him vying after someone else. (Although, she did get pretty upset and tilted with the Warden Surana hanging around since she knows about that LMAO.)

LOVE — McJunk .

Who said “I love you” first? Jesse. He said it a few times. Jun-ki’s kinda mean, though; I’m pretty sure she told him no he doesn’t a few times? Idk, he’s too nice for this bitch.

What are their primary love languages? Jesse’s is pet names and touch both. He’s not really shy so he can express it in a lot of ways. Jun’s is small gestures, like sitting with someone while they’re struggling. I guess her other one is also literally fighting people for him even tho he definitely probably did not ask LOL.

How often do they cuddle/engage in PDA? All the time. All the fucking time. Their coworkers hate them. Think April and Andy, and then multiply. (And Jun literally would spit her gum in this man’s mouth just to annoy other people.)

What are their favorite things to do together? They do... so much together uhhhh sdfghj idk, I know Jun likes doing most things with Jesse around now. Movie nights, pizza dates, annoying PDA, drinking games, weird places to fuck... they’re a little inseparable. I think the only thing Jun doesn’t like to do with Jesse around is upgrade sessions with Angela because she doesn’t want to be seen all broken up, and training segments because she doesn’t want to be responsible for him getting hurt.

Who’s better at comforting the other? Jesse. Jun’s never been good at it. He says what he thinks she needs to hear without impressing on her a bunch of psychology she never said she had. He’s just good at offering her something to relate to and a shoulder to lean on. Jun’s not very good with words, though, so she’s not very good at or sure how to offer comfort when someone needs it, especially Jesse. But she just says she’ll hang around and if they fight about it she just says to shut up and deal with it. He’s usually better once he vents.

Who’s more protective? BIG DEBATABLE. I think it’s pretty... even. I think either of them will fight as hard as they can for the other, though I think Jun may be the only one more likely to throw herself into actual harm’s way, and that’s just because she’s definitely the more reckless of the two.

Do they prefer verbal or physical affection? Jesse’s a more verbal person but I think physical affection and affirmation is where they’ve connected. No one has to say anything, he just does, but it’s just the cherry to the rest of it and physical communication and affection is more than enough for both of them.

What are some songs that apply to their relationship, in-universe or otherwise? THERE”S A WHOLE BUNCH ON THE SPOTIFY LET ME TELL UUUUU BUT THE BEST ARE OFF THE TOP OF MY HEAD “Something About Us” by Daft Punk “Amphetamine” by MNQN and also I could add matchbox 20 but i’m not tryna get roasted

What kind of nicknames do they call each other? Yikes. Uhhhhh, Jesse’s partial to: darlin’, sweetie, sweet pea, sweet bean, juniper berry, junnie b jones, jun-bug, and the list goes onnn. Jun’s partial to cowboy and (affectionately) dumbass.

DOMESTIC LIFE — Fuujiro .

If they get married, who proposes? Probably Shinjiro, and it was probably something stupid and weird at the grocery store.

What’s the wedding like? Who attends? Small, probably at a park or something, but all of their friends. They don’t have a lot, but that’s what makes it nice. I think they’d be more interested in spending money on travelling afterwards than trying to make a big deal out of a celebration.

How many kids do they have, if any? What are they like? I don’t think they have any kids. I don’t think Fuu has any interest in bringing a kid into the world bc of the shit she’s gone through on her end; there’s no innate part of her that thinks she needs to have a kid to raise them better just to make up for how alone and neglected she was as a child. If they wound up with any kids, it’d probably be some circumstantial adoption of a wayward orphan they kept coming, honestly? A mentorship or personal attachment just kind of developing, really. Like Denzel LMAO. That’s the only thing I could see happening really asdfgh.

Do they have any pets? THEY HAVE KOROMARU. Otherwise, I think they just put food and shelter boxes out for their neighbourhood cats. Shinjiro probably lets them in a lot.

Who’s the stricter parent? Shinjiro, hands down. He was the stricter parent when he was a teenager. Fuu is/ would be the parent who is also being scolded.

Who kills the bugs in the house? Shinjiro kills them and Fuu takes them outside. Shinjiro just doesn’t think bugs belong in the house, and Fuu thinks killing them is bad luck. If he kills them before she gets to take them outside, they probably “fight” about it, but it’s not a divisive convo that’ll sour the day.

How do they celebrate holidays? Shinjiro’s not really a holiday person and Fuu’s really busy, but I know she thinks they’re worth doing. So everything’s probably pretty quiet and half-decourated for. Holidays with events to go to that they don’t have to prepare for, like festivals, Fuu definitely nags to attend. Things like Christmas, I think they just plan on nice dinners and quiet evenings.

Who’s more likely to convince the other to come back to sleep in the morning? Ooh, uhhhhh asdfg that’s hard. Probably Shinjiro? I don’t think he tries often, but he is the one more likely to sleep late. I guess it’d be circumstantial, in a lot of ways. Like if he wasn’t sleeping a lot lately, Fuu would sleep late to try and keep him around. If Fuu’s overworking, Shinjiro would try to bait her back. But otherwise, it’s probably Shinjiro, since she’s usually up early because she wants to run early.

Who’s the better cook? Shinjiro, hands down. Fuu’s okay at it; if she has to make dinner, she’s happy to do it and it’d be fine food, it just wouldn’t be anything exciting or special. She understands basic seasoning laws and how to use a rice cooker. Shinjiro’s the one who’s anal-retentive about produce quality, technique, prepwork, etc. He’s the one who literally watches home cooking network and considers buying a separate pasta cooker, after all. It’s one of the few things he’s really passionate about, and he’s always emphasized how important a good meal and diet are to health with the idiots he hangs around.

#teethoc #silverblighted #fuujiro #mcjunk #cullida #liona #siona #Jun-Ki #cressida levoie #fuu maeda

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