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halsteadlover · 7 months

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𝐌𝐫. & 𝐌𝐫𝐬. 𝐇𝐚𝐥𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐝

*Gif and pics not mine credits to the owner*

• Pairing: Jay Halstead x Fem!Reader.

• Requested: no.

• Summary: you and Jay finally got married but even on your weeding day you can’t seem to be able to keep your hands off each other so you sneak out during the party to have a quick rendezvous.

• Warnings: smut (18+), dirty talking, lots of cursing, fingering, oral sex (m. receiving) unprotected sex (don’t be like them fellas!!!), semi-public sex, so much fluff you’ll drown in it.

• Word count: 7800.

• A/N: PLEASE READ THIS ONLY IF YOU’RE 18+ minors stay away. I’m actually shit at writing summaries y’all can tell. I’m so excited for this fic so y’all better eat this up 😭 I really hope you’ll like it, please let me know what you think and comment, like and reblog, it’d mean the world. Stay safe and love you all xx

“And I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride.”

It was surreal.

You and Jay were finally husband and wife and you couldn't believe it.

“I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you,” he had whispered on your lips when you exchanged your first kiss as husband and wife, your heart bursting with joy and happiness.

On the way to the wedding venue Jay did nothing but kiss and caress your ring finger, still in disbelief you really decided to marry him. You were his, forever.

You couldn’t stop grinning.

Everything seemed more beautiful. The colors were brighter, the air cleaner, the sky bluer, the trees greener.

Everyone present including colleagues, friends, family could see how happy you both were, how much you doted on each other, how much you were in love. There wasn’t anyone who hadn't thought at least once how much they would’ve liked to experience a love like yours. So pure, genuine, crazy, overwhelming.

Jay didn't take his eyes or hands off of you for even a second.

He kept looking at you and the more he saw you smiling, laughing, so happy and carefree, the more he couldn't contain his disbelief. God, he would’ve given you the fucking moon if it meant always seeing that smile on your face. You were so unbelievably beautiful especially in that white dress, which hugged your body so perfectly it seemed to be sewn on you.

My wife.

He kept repeating in his mind.

How the hell did he get so lucky?

His hand circled your hips with a firm, possessive grip, while his thumb caressed the fabric of the dress that covered your skin. He couldn’t help but stealing kisses from you from time to time, between a ‘congratulations’ and another, whispering how much he loved you and how fabulous you looked in your wedding dress.

“Did I already tell you how stunning you are, my love?” Jay asked as his eyes ran up and down your body, holding you to him with so much passion and desire you felt like you were dying in his arms.

You both had inaugurated the dance floor by doing the first dance and while those present watched the scene with emotion, some of your relatives took videos with their cell phones, unaware of the things that Jay was whispering to you and just seeing with how much adoration you looked at each other.

You smiled as you talked, slowly swaying to the song’s rhythm, unaware of how much your eyes sparkled as you looked at him. He looked at you with just as much admiration, his cheeks aching from how much he was smiling, his heart exploding with joy. Even someone blind could tell how much that man loved and adored you, how much he venerated you, how much he worshiped the land you walked on.

“You're not half bad either Mr Halstead,” you replied with a cheeky smile, unable to take your eyes off him and how wonderfully the suit he was wearing looked on him “God, I just want to rip your clothes off right now,” you continued, not realizing you had actually said it out loud.

Jay's arms tightened around your hips, pulling you further into his body and trying to hide how that one sentence made him feel. “Baby don't talk to me like that… I'm already trying so hard not to drag you away right now. You really want to make me lose my mind?” He warned you in a low tone, his lips brushing your ear before leaving a soft kiss on your cheek. He then sighed with frustration making you chuckle. “I don't think I can last the whole day.”

The song came to an end before you could respond and before you knew it everybody was drunkly dancing around you.

Your feet were sore as you and Jay danced with friends and relatives and you would’ve paid gold to take off those damned torture machines.

Seriously, why did heels have to hurt so much?

You were hot, sweaty but happy, like you had never been before. Jay wasn't much for dancing so he eventually went to talk to some other guests but he was having the time of his life and couldn’t take his eyes off you as he watched you dance, the way your body moved to the music, the way your curves were hugged by your wedding dress, the the way you sprayed happiness from every pore.

The love he felt for you was so unconditional, powerful and intense in such a way it took the air out of his lungs, it made the blood boil in his veins, it consumed him deeply, burned him from inside.

He had never once in his life felt anything like this, not until he met you. It felt like constantly being punched in the stomach every time you looked or smiled at him, it felt like his heart skipped a beat every time he heard your laugh, making it dance to that melody he couldn't wait to hear for the rest of his life. That kind of love was so profound that even when you were sad or cried, he felt like a piece of him was being ripped out of his body, especially when he couldn’t do anything to make you feel better.

He lived for you, breathed for you only, to a point he couldn’t even function when you weren’t by his side.

“Okay, okay, enough, I'd like to dance with my wife now,” Jay's voice made you turn and you almost tripped over your own feet when your eyes landed on him.

He was standing behind you, looking at you with a gorgeous and mischievous smile on his lips, his hands shoved in the pockets of his suit. He exuded confidence from every pore of his body and you couldn’t even explain how you managed to get that man. He was so charming, so dreamy and insanely hot, he completely took your breath away.

My husband.

Wow. How the hell did I get so lucky?

You smiled at him and the friend you were dancing with raised her hands in surrender. “She’s all yours Halstead but treat her right or I’ll kill you.”

His eyes traveled down your body, running his tongue over his bottom lip after biting it as his gaze devoured you with so much intensity and desire that every cell in your body lit up on fire. “She’s in excellent hands Clara, don't worry.”

“Ugh you’re disgusting. Stop eye-fucking my friend in front of me.”

You laughed as he wrapped an arm around your waist, now looking at Clara. “Can you blame me? C’mon look at her.”

“I’m still here and I can here you, you know,” you intervened, giggling as your arm encircled his hips too.

“I'm watching you Halstead, just remember that,” she warned him with an amused look and pointing her finger at him before walking away and going to grab another drink.

Jay then let you go and turned your body to his, holding out a hand towards you, finally meeting your gaze again. “Would you give me the honor of this dance, Mrs Halstead?”.

The way that name slipped from his lips made you melt like a snowman under the heat of the sun's rays, God how much you loved the way it sounded.

Mrs Halstead. Fuck me.

“The honor is all mine Mr. Halstead,” You grabbed his hand and before you knew it you were already pressed against his chest while his arms wrapped again around your hips possessively, almost as if he was afraid to let you go.

“My gorgeous wife” he whispered while swaying to the rhythm of the music. A rush of shivers ran down your spine forming goosebumps all over your skin. “Do you have any idea how much you drive me crazy? I’m so obsessed with you baby.”

His lips left small, sweet kisses on your lips, making you have a hard time to respond. You giggled as his beard tickled you meanwhile he planted chaste kisses along your cheek and neck. He inhaled your scent deeply, a scent he’d never could live without.

“And I’m so obsessed with you.” You wrapped your arms around his neck as his hands slid down the small of your back, resting chastely on your ass. “You make me so insanely happy Mr Halstead.”

Anyone who saw you two would say you were just a beautiful couple dancing happily on the best day of their lives.

But the things Jay was whispering in your ear were far from innocent, they would’ve made even a porn star blush.

“God I can't wait to take this dress off you,” he had said as your bodies moved in time to the music. He had turned you around, pressing your back against his chest and wrapping his arms around your waist. There was a lively song playing at the moment, the bass so loud you could hear it across the room and you couldn't deny you were grinding against him more sensually than you would other times on purpose.

You couldn't control yourself, not when it came to him.

Jay had the ability to make you give in with just two simple words whispered in your ear. Normally you couldn't keep your hands to yourself for a long time, your sexual chemistry had always been high and this moment was no different. You wanted him so badly you almost forgot you were on the dance floor celebrating your wedding.

You almost moaned when you felt his erection pressed against your ass, hard and sore, repressing the instinct to get on your knees and pull down his pants in front of everyone.

“Baby,” he murmured against your ear, leaving wet kisses on your neck. “God the things I would do to you now…”

Your stomach tightened in a vice as the heat in your lower abdomen continued to expand. “Tell me darling. What would you do to me now?” You replied in a question, pressing your ass further against his dick.

God I hope no one notices.

Jay let out a sigh that went straight to your pussy, making your legs clench in desire. “Fuck please stop, I can't take this anymore,” his arms tightened around your hips even more, as if trying to let out the frustration. He felt like he was exploding and the more you kept grinding against him, so sensually to the music’s rhythm, the more he wanted to rip your dress off and fuck you in front of all the guests.

You turned towards him again, placing your hands on his chest and caressing him slowly and sensually while batting your eyelashes seductively as you looked at him.

Jay thought he’d come in his pants just from the way you were looking at him.

His eyes were now hungrily fixed on your lips, which he wanted so desperately wrapped around his hard dick.

“So?” You urged with a smirk on your lipstick-covered lips. “What would you do to me baby?”.

Jay placed his hands on your face, caressing your cheeks with his thumbs. “You really want to know what I would do to my wife right now?”.

You were so desperate you nodded as if you were possessed, God, you would’ve done anything that man asked you. That man that was now your husband.

It's so surreal.

He licked his lips as his eyes moved up and down your body for a moment, quickly but at the same time imprinting every detail of how that dress looked on you in his memory, before returning his eyes to your face and tracing with them the outline of your lips.

“It would be better if I showed her, don't you think?” he whispered against your lips, making you forget again you were in public and not just the two of you.

“Wouldn't it be better if I just showed her the way I would take off her dress and get on my knees for her? Wouldn't it be better if I showed her how much I want and desire her by licking her pussy and every bit and drop of her wetness until her legs tremble? By fucking her so hard until we both forget our names? By being buried so deep inside that sweet little cunt of hers that she’s gonna feel me for days?”.

He pressed his lips on yours in a chaste and sweet kiss, in stark contrast with the things he was saying to you. “And show her how hard I am inside my pants just by looking at her in this dress? Show her how happy I am that she’s my wife? That I get to keep her forever?”.

That's it.

You slightly pulled away from him and grabbed his hand before leading him away from the dance floor and out of the wedding reception, not caring if someone actually saw you two leave. Your free hand held the edge of your dress as the two of you walked down the hall. He followed you like a puppy, a stupid, inebriated smile on his lips, his body quivering with anticipation and frenzy.

You arrived in front of a door that marked ‘storage room’ on its nameplate and looked around noticing that no one was there. You opened the door and pulled Jay inside with you and before you could even fully turn towards him, his hands were already on your face and his lips had captured yours in a kiss that took the breath out of your lungs.

He closed the door with his feet as he devoured you in a passionate and devastating kiss. Never letting you go, he removed one hand from your face before locking the door, returning his full attention to you immediately after.

He didn't know why but that was one of the most beautiful and breathtaking kiss you had ever exchanged, so overwhelming it made his knees weak and his stomach twist.

It may have been the fact that was the first real and passionate kiss as a married couple, maybe it was because he could finally call you his wife, because he could do this for the rest of his life, but all of this drove him like crazy.

“God I want you so much baby,” you breathed out in a little moment of separation. He didn't give you room to do or say anything else because he started kissing you again so intensely that a hit train would’ve been less crushing.

You slightly parted your lips and his tongue slid in your mouth without hesitation as they moved in sync against each other. Your dragged your hands along his chest, touching every bit of his body you could reach, almost shaking from the frenzy and desire of wanting to touch his heated skin.

A deep moan vibrated in his throat when you sucked on his tongue, making him lose that shred of sanity he had left. He pushed you against the wall, his body pressed against yours as he continued to kiss you passionately and greedily.

“You'll be the death of me,” he murmured against your lips as he planted kisses up your jaw and down to your neck. His tongue wet your skin as he nibbled it, his lips sucking at the same time making you gasp and writhe in pleasure. “I want to fucking rip this dress off you.”

You giggled – since the feeling was pretty much reciprocated – eyes still half closed as you enjoyed the sensation his lips gave you. “Don't you dare, it was expensive as fuck.”

He suddenly pulled away from you and a cold feeling took over you at that distance. His eyes traveled down your body and how your wedding dress hugged every single curve perfectly, fuck, it felt like it had been sculpted on you, like it was made just for you to wear.

He just wanted to take a good look at you, imprint in his memory every single detail of you in your white wedding dress.

But the way he looked at you, God. He was like a predator about to haunt his prey, glaring at it with desire, ready to capture it and devour its flesh with voracity and hunger. You felt so beautiful, like you could rule the world, like you were unstoppable, and you could only thank your husband for that.

“Fuck baby…” His chest rising and falling heavily due to that ardent kiss. He bit his bottom lip so hard he thought it’d start bleeding. He shook his head slightly as he continued to look at you lustfully, as if he could hardly believe you really existed, that you were actually his. “My beautiful, perfect wife…” He sighed. “I could just come from looking at you damn it.”

You pulled him back to you by the collar of his jacket and had to use all the strength you had in your body not to tear it off him along with that shirt. You kissed him again as your hands roamed down his body. You just couldn't take it anymore, you felt you’d explode soon or later if you didn't have him immediately.

You slipped his jacket off his shoulders, dropping it to the floor and hastily unbuttoned his shirt, eager to finally touch him, feel his skin against yours.

He did the same, unzipping your dress and you pulled away as he helped you step out of it. You didn't care if it got dirty or even ripped, you were just eager to finally have him, to feel him, your mind too foggy to think about anything other than Jay. But he took your dress instead of dropping it on the floor and placed it on an empty chair there.

This gesture made you smile with happiness and with every passing second you couldn't help but think about how you couldn't have chosen a better man to be your husband.

It was only then that Jay realized what you were wearing underneath your wedding dress, that vision alone almost making him fall unconscious on the floor. You were wearing one of the sexiest and most breathtaking white lingerie he had ever seen you wear and this made him regret not dragging you out that dance floor sooner.

My fucking wife.

“Baby… Jesus Christ…” he sighed heavily as he looked at you with so much lust and hunger, his mouth and his eyes wide open. “You… Wow… You’re so fucking beautiful… Holy shit…”

“I guess you like it then,” you giggled like a schoolgirl and grabbed his hands, pulling him back to you. He wasted no time touching you, caressing your curves and sliding his hand down your back until he grabbed your ass. He squeezed and massaged it with so much passion you were sure he’d leave some marks.

“Is this what you were hiding from me under that dress? Fuck if I had known I would’ve fucked you on that damn dance floor in front of everyone.” He started to grind his pelvis with yours and making you moan when his hard dick pressed against your intimacy.

“Jay please…” you sighed as he continued to grind against you, making you lose your mind. God you wanted him so much you it hurt.

His lips kept brushing his lips against yours, pulling back when you tried to kiss him and chuckling at your frustration.

“My sweet beautiful wife,” he murmured and placed his lips on your neck, on that particular spot that he knew made you lose your mind. A small moan left your mouth as he began to lick and suck at your skin again and you tilted your head, giving him more access. “I can't wait to be inside you.”

You grabbed his face and pressed your mouth on his, kissing him voraciously and passionately. It was like you were burning inside, as if your soul was trying to escape from inside your body and merge with his.

You had reached the point where you couldn't hold on for a second longer, you wanted your husband, you wanted him to take you there against those cold walls while all the guests danced in the wedding reception unaware of what you were doing.

You frantically unbuttoned his pants and pulled them down along with his boxers and freeing his hard erection, after sliding his shirt down his arms and leaving him naked in all his glory. You wrapped your hand around his erected dick and he let out a throaty moan, so fucking sexy you found yourself squeezing your legs together for some relief.

“Fuck yes…” he groaned as he struggled to continue kissing you while your hand pumped up and down on his dick. “I want to fuck this pretty mouth so bad,” he placed a hand on your cheek as his thumb caressed your lips. You took it into your mouth, licking and sucking it while your eyes were fixed on his.

He stopped when another loud moan left his mouth and he tilted his head back, his mind too clouded with pleasure. “Shh… You don’t want anyone to hear us don’t you love?” You smirked as you let go of his thumb.

“I don't give a fuck, I just need you,” he whimpered in an increasingly desperate tone.

“Yeah? How bad do you need me baby? Tell me,” you whispered sensually, biting his bottom lip as you slowed the pace of your hand and earning a frustrated verse from him.

“Fuck… Stop playing with me,” he warned you while at the same time his hips buckled up to meet your hand’s motion. You drew imaginary circles on his tip with your thumb, wet from the stain of precum. “Fucking tease,” he hissed before kissing you again. It was a sloppy and messy kiss, his tongue exploring every inch of your mouth, your saliva mixing with each other.

“Now get on your knees.”

Your pussy clenched at the sound of those words and you were never so happy to obey. You were about to kneel down but before you could, he picked up his jacket from the ground and placed it in front of you, making you smile like an idiot.

If there was one thing that Jay cared about more than anything it was knowing that you were comfortable, everything else came second and this was one of the many things you loved about him: how thoughtful and caring he was, even at certain times you always came first.

“I love you so much, you know that?” You kissed him sweetly, making him smile.

“It’ll be better for you since I put a ring on that finger.” He chuckled. “And I love you so much more.”

Your heart exploded in your chest and you kissed him one last time before kneeling down, your eyes still in his as he watched with attention every little movement you made.

You jerked him off again before moving your face closer to his dick, sticking your tongue out and he almost fainted… Fuck, he wanted to take a picture of that moment so badly, he would’ve printed it out and hung it all over your home because that vision alone was pure heaven.

Maybe it wasn't a proper thing to do to compare the image of you with his dick in your hand and your tongue sticking out to heaven, but he was too distracted to think about it.

A deep, guttural moan escaped his mouth as you traced a long wet line with your tongue from the base of his dick to the tip, which went straight to his pussy, forcing you to squeeze your legs together again.

“Ah holy shit…” he sighed, breaking off with another moan when you drew circles on his tip with your tongue just as you had done with your thumb not long before, tasting the saltiness of the leaking precum. “Fuck baby please stop torturing me…”

You smirked before wrapping your lips around his veiny dick and taking it fully into your mouth, starting a steady rhythm as you bobbed your head up and down his shaft.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he whimpered in pleasure as the heat of your mouth enveloped him. His eyes were half closed, his lips slightly parted as he struggled to maintain control and not make any noises. But it was so fucking hard, especially when your eyes were looking at him with so much sensuality they took the air out of his chest, not when your mouth was making him more ecstatic than any drug that existed.

“Yeah baby just like that… Oh yes… My sweet girl…”

He threw his head back, giving you a perfect view of his neck, his prominent jawline and veins and that alone was one of the hottest, sexiest things you had ever seen in your entire life.

His moans filled that little storage room and you hoped for a second no one was passing by or they would’ve surely heard him, but this thought immediately vanished, too caught up to his pleasure to care about the rest of the world.

Jay began to move his hips, fucking your mouth and hitting the back of your throat with the tip of his dick. “Shit, shit…” he loudly moaned “God you’re so fucking pretty with my dick in your mouth.”

And it was true.

You were so breathtakingly beautiful. Especially with your watery eyes, the mascara running down your cheeks, your lips swollen and pink as they continued to grind on his shaft, back and forth, again and again.

You tried not to gag while he continued to fuck your throat with particular voracity but it was almost impossible, just as it was becoming difficult to breathe as his dick kept completely filling your mouth.

“Y-yes baby… Oh fuck… That mouth of yours will be the death of me.”

Even though you were the one on your knees, you felt so powerful. Damn it, how much you loved knowing you were the only one who could make him feel this way, that you were the only one whose mouth he could fuck so mercilessly it almost made you choke on his dick, knowing that his moans, his sighs and whimpers were only and solely for you, knowing that it was only you who was making him lose his mind so badly.

He placed a hand on your head, threading his fingers into your styled hair, tugging and making you moan onto his dick. God you loved it when he did that, and he knew it.

Sensing you were having trouble breathing, Jay pulled his dick out of your mouth, taking it into his hand. “Stick out your tongue.”

You did as he said, feeling every cell in your body go up in flames.

“Such a good girl. My baby is so good for me."

He smirked as he began to slam his dick against your tongue which left a long stream of saliva on it, his other hand still in your hair as he continued to maneuver your head to his liking.

“You like that huh? You like being my pretty little slut?”.

“Fuck yes baby, please use me.”

He put his dick in your mouth again, letting out some of the most borderline pornographic moans you’ve ever heard along with strings of obscenities and profanities.

“My wife is so dirty… Oh god yeah… She likes being dirty for me?” He groaned and you managed to nod while looking at me through your lashes. It didn't take long for him to feel the orgasm starting to build inside him and he had to stop, not being able to hold on any longer.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck stop baby, you're gonna make me come,” he panted as if he'd run a marathon, stepping back and letting his dick pop out of your mouth. “I… Fuck, I need to be inside you.”

Before you could say or do anything, he helped you get on your feet and pressed his lips to yours still swollen, wet and pink from the killer blowjob you had just given him. He pressed your back against the cold wall but you didn't care, you were too hot to notice.

A moan escaped your lips this time when he moved your lace panties to the side with his fingers and slid them over your pussy.

“Fuck… Baby, ah yeah…”

“So fucking wet god… You drive me insane, I can't wait to be inside this pussy,” he kissed your neck as his fingers drew imaginary circles on your clit giving you the pleasure you so much needed.

Your hips began to slowly rotate following the same movement he was doing, your mind clouded with pleasure as you felt yourself already on the verge of an orgasm. God you were so horny, you didn't think you'd ever been this eager to fuck him.

“Look at that, fuck me, you're soaking my hands baby…”

“Bab-… Fuck yes… Please…” you babbled senselessly, struggling to keep at bay the moans and sighs that had taken the place of Jay's and were filling the storage room at that moment. “I… I can't…”

You wrapped an arm around his neck while grabbing his bicep with the other hand, trying to find some support because you felt like you’d collapse on the floor at any moment.

Your lips nibbled and sucked the skin of his neck making him sigh in your ear, on one hand to keep your almost uncontainable moans and on the other because you wanted to mark him, because you loved seeing what you did to him, you loved knowing he has only yours.

“Ah yeah… Fuck…” you hissed, biting down on his skin when he penetrated you with two fingers.

“Yes baby, fuck yourself on my fingers. Show me how much you like when your husband touches you like that.”

“J-Jay… Oh shit… I need you please…” you managed to stammer between moans. You felt like you were about to come but you needed to feel him, you needed his dick inside you.

Jay pulled his fingers out and you almost had a heart attack when he brought them to his lips. Without his eyes ever leaving yours, he licked away every trace of your fluids, humming with pleasure as he tasted you.

“You taste like heaven, I can't wait to lick every fucking drop and make you come on my face.”

“Jay I'm about to lose my goddamn mind. Please hurry up.”

He chuckled and brought his hands to your ass, pressing your half covered pussy by your panties still pulled aside against his dick, making both of you sigh with desire.

“What do you want baby? Tell me.”

You grabbed his face with your hands, pressing your mouth against his and sliding your tongue inside his when he slightly parted his lips. His hands continued to massage your now red ass, pressing his fingers hard as you kept grinding against each other.

“I want my husband to fuck me against this wall,” you whispered against his lips, pink and swollen from your impetuous kisses, your noses brushing.

My husband.

These simple words made him feel a sensation he couldn’t quite describe, an explosion of emotions that caused an electric shock to go through his entire body, which made his heart beat wildly and his legs feel like jelly.

It was pure melody.

It was so sweet and sexy at the same time, it made him was so happy he felt like he was touching the sky with a finger. He was your fucking husband and he couldn’t still fathom the idea he really managed to make you his wife.

Jay crashed his lips against yours again, sucking out that little trace of your soul you still had left in your body. He was eager to possess you, to feel you, to show you how much he loved and wanted you.

His hands lowered to your thighs and you took that as a sign to jump into his arms. With almost astonishing ease, he lifted you up and you wrapped your legs around his hips and your arms around his neck.

Your back was pressed against the cold wall but it didn't bother you, you couldn't even feel it. With one hand he held your thigh, while the other stroked his dick a couple of times before aligning it towards your entrance, penetrating you with a single slow thrust and making both of you to let out a loud and deep moan.

“Jesus Christ, fuck…” he moaned, using every ounce of his will and strength not to come instantly. His other hand settled on your thigh again and his fingers pressed so hard they felt like they were going to tear your skin at any moment.

Jay had his face buried in the crook of your neck, his lips wide open as if trying to get some air, his breathing quickened.

“Shit baby you feel so good inside me,” you breathed out as his dick stretched out every corner of your vagina. He wasn't even moving and you were already falling apart. “Please move…”

Jay pulled out of you slightly just to penetrate you again, this time with more force. He started moving his hips slowly, in and out of you, making you crave for more. But it didn't take long for him to start fucking you like his life depended on it, his thrusts now stronger.

He was thrusting so deep you could feel him in every corner of your body and a piece of you disintegrating with each passing second. Your arms held him close to you, your fingers on his shoulders while your nails slid across his skin, leaving marks that would probably stay there for days.

“God baby I can't get enough of you, f-fuck…” he groaned in your ear as his lips left trails of wet kisses on your neck and his tongue licked your sweaty skin.

You tried to answer but the pleasure was so intense, so high you couldn’t get anything out of your mouth other than a moan or a whimper. It felt so fucking good you couldn't even describe it.

A particularly loud moan escaped your lips as he gave a particular deep thrust, making you almost jump out of your skin as he hit your G-spot. “Oh my fucking god… Just like that… Oh yeah baby…”

“That's it, moan for for me princess. You’re being so good.”

He raised his head from the crook of your neck so he could look at you. You opened your eyes and met his eyes shining with luxury and passion, his pupils so dilated you couldn’t see the green of his irises.

His dick twitched inside you as he continued to fuck you against the wall mercilessly, and seeing you so deeply in the throes of pleasure, your mouth slightly open, your cheeks flushed, your eyes half closed… He was going crazy.

You kept looking at each other’s eyes, extending the deep connection between you two to another level. It wasn’t just your bodies that were fucking, but your souls too and you would’ve payed gold to stop the time and live this moment over and over again, forever.

“I love you so much baby, God I love you.”

“Fuck.” He crashed his lips into yours in a messy and sloppy kiss due to the continuous gasps interrupting you. You rested your forehead on his, both covered in a thin layer of sweat.

“Mine.”

He kissed you as his dick soaked with your fluids continued to thrust in and out of your pussy.

“Mine.”

He kissed you again.

“Mine.”

He kissed you once again, sucking and biting your lower lip but stopped by another moan as your walls clenched around him making him struggle to even stand still.

“God… Oh yes baby keep going… Please…” you spluttered and closed your eyes as you felt your orgasm take over you.

“Don't close your eyes, please look at me… Ah Jesus… Fuck yeah keep clenching around me like that, you’re such a good girl for me baby.”

You did as he said as you placed your hands on his face looking into his eyes and feeling that sensation of pressure twisting and clenching your insides.

“I love you, fuck… S-so much…” you cried out again now, your mind completely gone. Your eyes started to water from the intensity of his thrusts and you felt like you were going to implode in that same instant. “I'm coming, I'm coming, I’m coming please don’t stop…”

A loud moan escaped your lips as an overwhelming orgasm hit you like a truck, almost giving you a heart attack. Your arms encircled his neck again, your nails scratching the skin of his shoulders.

You didn't know if you could die from an orgasm but damn that was exactly how you felt. It was like someone made you fall from a ten-story building without a parachute.

Jay exploded in an orgasm after a few more thrusts, filling your pussy with his cum until the last drop before pulling out. He exhaustedly rested his head on your shoulder leaving small, sweet kisses on your neck.

The silence that now reigned in the storage room was only broken by your panting while you both tried to catch your breath as if you had just run a marathon.

You felt so good in that moment, like your body was floating in space and you didn't know if it was the thrill of being discovered, if it was the wedding, but that was the best sex you had ever had.

“God I can't feel my body anymore,” you murmured and he chuckled as you stroked the hair on the back of his head, leaving kisses on his cheek in the meantime.

That little room smelled of him, you and sex and you had never smelled a more sublime fragrance.

“Can we stay here forever?”.

“I'm afraid we still have a party to attend,” he tiredly chuckled again. Jay raised his head to look at you, a stupid smile on his lips, his heart happy. “Do you have any idea how fucking beautiful you are angel?”.

You smiled and gave him a kiss on the lips, this time sweet and gentle in contrast to the ones exchanged so far. “And you're a flatterer Mr Halstead, I know I look awful right now, my makeup is all ruined.”

“You’ve never been more beautiful than you are now Mrs Halstead. You look like you've been fucked properly.”

You rolled your eyes playfully, already starting to imagine the jokes and teasing your friends would make as soon as they’d see you, not to mention the embarrassment in front of your relatives and family.

You decided you’d think about this at the right time.

After both of your regained a bit of strength again, Jay carefully put you down but wrapping an arm around your waist when your knees buckled and you nearly fell to the ground.

“Wipe that stupid grin off your face,” you commented with mock annoyance when you noticed the smug, proud expression he was looking at you with and the way he was trying not to chuckle.

“I take full credit,” he laughed and before you could respond he silenced you with a kiss, making you forget what you even wanted to say.

After getting dressed, Jay helped you put your wedding dress back on, zipping it up your back and helping you fix your hair and what was left of your makeup as much as he could. He left a kiss on your right shoulder as his hands stroked up and down your arms. “I don't want to go back there.”

He kept planting kisses on your shoulder and up towards the crook of your neck and your jaw until he reached your cheek which he insisted on, making you smile stupidly. His arms wrapped around your hips from behind, pressing your body against him and holding you until you were almost breathless.

“Where did the ‘we have a party to attend’ go?” You teased him, meanwhile placing your hands on his and caressing them.

“I want you all to myself, I'm not ready to share you with other people again, plus now I want to fuck you again.”

You laughed, feeling your cheeks heat up. “Already?“.

“Already? Baby I would spend twenty-four hours a day and seven days a week buried deep inside you, don't act like you don't know me c'mon.” He kissed you again. “And above all seeing my cum dripping out of you and this damn lingerie drives me crazy, you can’t seriously expect me to resist you.”

You turned to him and cupped his face in your hands before pressing your lips against his as his arms encircled your hips again. A flock of butterflies exploded inside your stomach and he kissed you breathtakingly, making you lose the ground beneath your feet.

“I love you so much,” you whispered between kisses, forgetting again that the two of you had been locked in that storage room for God knew how long. “I'm so happy I married you.”

He smiled as you kissed him again, almost making you kiss his teeth. He’d never get tired of hearing it, no matter how much you had said it. “God baby I love you so much more.” He held you even tighter, as if he wanted to somehow get under your skin and steal your soul, which he had actually been doing for so long.

“My wife, my wife, my wife,” he continued to whisper, stealing several more kisses from you, kisses that he actually couldn't even manage to give you because of the way you couldn't stop smiling.

“You make my heart so happy.”

“Stop you're going to make me cry,” you hit him lightly on the shoulder covered by his jacket, feeling your eyes fill with tears.

God, could you love someone so much it hurt? Because that's how you felt.

You loved that man so much. So intensely you couldn't sleep when he wasn't there, so much you missed him even when he was just a few meters away from you, so deeply you couldn't imagine a life without him since the moment you met him.

You had always dreamed of an everlasting love, the kind that took your breath away just by thinking of it, that fairytale love, that love you had always read in novels and seen in films and Jay Halstead gave you all this and much more than you ever imagined or deserved.

He was peace.

He was home.

He was everything you had ever wanted and more.

Jay took your hands in his, bringing them to his lips and leaving a kiss on both of them, focusing in particular on your ring finger. His eyes shone like the ring’s stone at that moment and you looked at them mesmerized, thinking about how lucky you were to be able to do this all your life.

“We should go back there…” you murmured in a low voice, already sad for having to break that little bubble in which you took refuge even if not for a long time.

He snorted like a child but nodded. “I can't wait to have you all for myself.”

He intertwined his fingers with yours before unlocking the door and peeking out for a moment to see if anyone was nearby.

“Shit,” he muttered, immediately closing the door again when he saw a waiter walking down the hall holding an empty tray.

You let out a laugh when you saw his expression and he covered your mouth with his hand. “Shh, they'll hear us.”

“Baby we were fucking against the wall ten minutes ago, I'd say we're a little late for that don’t you think?” you whispered back, taking his hand away and looking at him with a raised eyebrow.

He playfully rolled his eyes. “Yeah, yeah whatever. Now kiss me.”

Before you could say anything he pulled you towards him by your hips, pressing his lips on yours. His body was pressed against the door and yours against his, your arms around his neck and his around your waist as his hands slid on your ass while you made out like teenagers hiding from your own parents.

“I'll never get tired of kissing you, it'll never be enough,” he whispered against your lips, nibbling and sucking your lower lip, making you sigh.

“I know what you're doing, stop it. Until proven otherwise it's still our wedding and we have to celebrate it,” you admonished him, dropping your hands to his chest and slightly pushing yourself away from him. You got a sound of disappointment in response, just what a child would do.

“You know what’s a great way to celebrate? Having sex. C'mon baby, come here.” He tried to put his hands on your hips again but you took a step back, crossing your arms over your chest in mock disappointment.

“We have a whole life to have wild sex. You don’t want to celebrate your wedding with your wife?”.

“Drop the act baby, I’m not falling for it,” he boop your nose with his index finger, a gesture that immediately made you smile even though you tried so hard to hold it back. “Of course I want to celebrate with you, that's not what I meant. This is the best day of my life.”

He chuckled before grabbing your hand and moving away from the door. He opened it again and like a few moments before, he checked no one was coming. When he realized that no one was passing by at that moment, you both left the storage room and he closed the door behind you.

You both smoothed your dress even though it was totally useless, anyone from a mile away could tell you had some hot sex just some moments before.

But you didn't care, it was your day, yours and Jay's and damn, you were free to do whatever you wanted even if it meant sneaking out of your own party to have sex in a storage room.

Okay, it wasn't a very proper thing to do but what could you say, all couples consummated their marriage on their wedding night, you and Jay had just rushed things along.

So you walked hand in hand with your fingers intertwined towards the wedding reception, both of you with a stupid and joyful smile on your faces and happy as you had never been, ready to get drunk and finally start your life together.

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xomakara · 8 months

Text

Inked By You

SUMMARY | You're best friends with Johnny and have had feelings for him for awhile. You think he's only attracted to you because of your tattoos but it's so much more. PAIRINGS | Johnny/Fem!Reader GENRE | non-idol au, college au, friends to lovers, smut, unprotected sex, oral sex, dirty talk, fluff towards the end RATING | Mature LENGTH | 10,114 words AUTHOR’S NOTE | This turned out longer than I expected LOL. So in this one, all the members I mentioned are the same age lolol. I hope it makes sense. Does it make sense?? I feel like my writing style has been wonky lately.

“Those are real, aren’t they?” Johnny asked you as he leaned against your bedroom wall. Taeyong and Yuta were lounging on your bed before joining the party that was going on in your living room. Johnny was looking at the various tattoos that were on your left arm.

You and Johnny have been best friends since your freshman year of college. Although you both have very different personalities and interests, there was one thing that kept you close together: partying. It's your last year of college and despite all the stress from studying and taking exams, you still got together every now and again to do what you all did best.

Drink, dance, and make memories.

Johnny is wearing a silk button-down shirt and black slacks. And then there was you in a tight mini skirt and a one-shouldered top that accentuated your figure and showed off your tattoo sleeve.

You looked good.

Even though it wasn’t what most people would consider a typical Friday night out, you, Johnny and other mutual friends seemed happy enough as you stood in front of the mirror checking out each other.

That was until you caught Johnny staring at your body with an expression that suggested he wanted more than just a quick look. The silence between you both grew awkward and uncomfortable until you finally broke it by saying, “What? Are my tits distracting you or something?”

He snapped out of his trance with a surprised look on his face, causing you to smile. He quickly apologized for staring, but said that he was genuinely interested in your ink. You nodded in response, knowing exactly what he meant by that. There was no denying the amount of attention you always got when wearing a low-cut top or a revealing dress. Your tattoo sleeve was another story though. People either loved them or hated them.

Despite the interest from many men, you never really considered getting any more tattoos after you finished your sleeves because, frankly, your current ones turned heads even if you wore a burlap sack. It wasn't uncommon for you to get double takes from people you knew as well as complete strangers when walking around town. On top of that, you didn't want to mess up the awesome artwork that had already been drawn onto your skin. Your current sleeves represented some of your favorite memories, which you didn't ever want to lose. So while others spent thousands of dollars on inked bodies, you got yourself beautiful pieces of art that couldn't be taken away.

Still, you couldn't help but notice how excited Johnny appeared whenever he saw you in your sexy outfits. As far as you could tell, he never missed an opportunity to stare at your tattoos, or check you out whenever you walked by him. Sometimes you would catch him ogling you in such a way that you felt like he wanted to rip off your clothes right there in public. Of course, there was no way he'd actually do anything like that. He wasn't that kind of guy.

Besides, you knew for a fact that he had a girlfriend who also attended the same college as you. They had been dating for about a few months, so she was obviously important to him. Still, whenever he caught you wearing something tight or sexy, he couldn't help but show off those sinful eyes of his.

With everyone gathered in yours and Taeil's living room, you tried to ignore the eye candy standing across from you as you and your friends continued to talk about meaningless things, like where you should go for dinner later tonight. You weren't even sure why you brought it up. Maybe you were bored, maybe you were drunk, or maybe you just needed something to keep your mind occupied. But whatever the reason, somehow the conversation ended up on the topic of sexual partners. When it comes to sexual encounters, your friends tend to live by the motto: if you haven't had sex with anyone, then you're not having fun.

You hadn't given much thought to that phrase until Jaehyun wiggled his eyebrows at you. "We all know that Y/N has fun doesn't she?"

You rolled your eyes, a smirk on your lips. "I've been told I have a knack for keeping people entertained."

"She can entertain me anytime!" Ten shouted. "Have you seen her ass in that red dress she wears?"

You couldn't help but laugh. That comment got everybody else laughing too.

"Anyways," You muttered before clearing your throat and turning towards Taeyong, "How many women have you slept with?"

Taeyong glanced over at Yuta and grinned, "Four, but it's probably more. Do you need me to give you a count?"

Taeil let out a small laugh before replying, "Four isn't bad. Don't think I'll ever get that high, although the number would probably increase if Yuta would stop trying to fuck everything that moves. Especially anything that moves."

You burst out laughing, followed by Yuta who laughed even harder. Eventually Taeil joined in, as did Jaehyun, and everyone else that was listening.

“But back to the question at hand,” Taeyong spoke up once he was able to calm down. He looked over at you, “how many men have you slept with?”

Johnny grabbed a bottle of beer from the kitchen counter and took a swig of it. He looked at you curiously.

"Well...if we include Jaehyun, Doyoung, Mark, Hendery and Renjun..." You counted, the men you called out looking at you for a brief moment before going back to whatever they were doing. "Five. But hey, who's counting? Sex is sex."

That answer seemed to satisfy Johnny, although he continued to watch you carefully. You noticed that he was taking an interest in your tattoos again. You shrugged it off as you and your friends continued talking, however your heart began to beat faster when you realized that he was no longer looking at your tattoos. His eyes were locked on yours.

"Hey guys,” Jungwoo called out to the rest of your group, waving a hand in front of their faces. “Who wants to get more beer and food with me?"

Thank you Jungwoo, for your timely interruption. You weren't sure how long you could last with Johnny staring at you. In fact, your knees started to feel a little weak when he cleared his throat to gain your attention. It was almost like he was daring you to say something. Something inappropriate, to be exact. But you had to be strong. After all, he was with his girlfriend.

"Uh, yeah," You replied, forcing a smile onto your face. “Let's go get some food and drinks."

You turned around, ready to follow Jungwoo into the kitchen. You paused for a second to take one last look at Johnny, and saw him watching you intently. You smiled sheepishly before stepping inside the kitchen to join your friends.

You turned around to see Johnny coming towards you. He didn't speak for a minute, so you waited patiently. "So, have you had fun yet?"

Your brows furrowed. You expected him to ask you if you were enjoying yourself. Instead he was asking you a completely different question. You wondered what this was all about, so you replied, "Of course I'm having fun! Why wouldn't I be?"

Before he could respond, Xiaojun called out. "Yo, Johnny! Jieun is here."

Fuck. Johnny's girlfriend.

You sighed inwardly as you watched him walk away with Xiaojun to greet her. If only he wasn't dating someone you actually knew. Then maybe he'd pay you the proper amount of attention.

Oh well. No use thinking about it.

You shook your head and focused on your friends. You hadn't seen them in awhile, so you welcomed the chance to hang out with them again. Plus, the alcohol helped to loosen your tongue, which allowed you to ask some of the questions you had been wondering about for quite some time.

"So, guys," you said, pouring some vodka into a glass. "Is it true that Renjun hooked up with someone last week?"

Renjun choked on his beer. You covered your mouth to hide your laughter. Kun let out a loud groan. Haechan let out a loud chuckle. Even Taeyong chuckled quietly.

You couldn't believe that they were being so open with you. It was like you were part of the group, and you liked it. You weren't sure if they realized that, but you were grateful nonetheless.

As soon as you saw Renjun regaining his composure, you spoke up again. "So, how many girls have you banged so far?"

Mark snorted. "Including you? Like eight or nine."

Kun guffawed. "More like twenty."

A shocked expression formed on your face. It was funny to hear their numbers compared to yours, but even funnier was hearing their reactions. Their reactions made you realize just how ridiculous their answers were. For example, Kun's claim that he had fucked more than twenty women in his lifetime was preposterous. However, you didn't dare bring it up.

Renjun shrugged. "I dunno. A lot."

Mark nodded. "At least ten."

Jungwoo scoffed. "No fucking way. Five tops."

"Bet none of those girls were as good as Y/N." Jaehyun reminded them, giving you a look. You rolled your eyes as he continued to talk. "And to everyone at this party that had sex with her, admit that she was good."

"I admit, I'm a good fuck." You shrugged, a small smirk on your lips. You nudged Jaehyun's shoulder. "Now shut up."

You all stared at each other for a minute before bursting out laughing. The alcohol was definitely starting to hit you hard, making you forget all about Johnny and his girlfriend. All that mattered was that you were surrounded by friends, having a good time, and drinking.

It wasn't long before Ten, Taeil, Mark, Kun, Haechan, Taeyong and you were sitting on the floor, passing around beers and shots as you waited for Jungwoo and Yuta to return with the food. And even though you were tipsy, you managed to hold your liquor fairly well. Until you drank the tequila shot you took right before going to get more drinks.

“So, Y/N.” Haechan drawled out, looking at you intently. You glanced at the tequila in your hands, your vision getting hazy. How much have you actually drunk so far?

“What?” you asked, shrugging. “What are you talking about?”

Haechan frowned. "You okay? You look wasted."

"Yeah, you look wasted Y/N." Taeyong said, as he put his drink down.

Your vision was getting worse. You felt dizzy. Your body was hot, then cold, then hot again. Fuck, you were going to pass out if you kept this up. You reached for the bottle of water next to you, holding it tightly against your chest. You closed your eyes for a second, concentrating on slowing your breathing. You managed to slow it down a bit, but you still felt lightheaded. Before you knew it, your vision blurred again. When you opened your eyes, you found everyone staring at you. Except for Taeyong. He was standing in front of you, looking very concerned.

"Taeyong." You whispered, unable to form any words. He held out his arms, inviting you to step into them.

"Come on, sweetheart. Let’s get you to bed." He said gently.

"Y/N." Johnny stepped forward, his face showing concern. His girlfriend laid a hand on his arm, suggesting that he stay put. "Are you okay?"

You nodded and stumbled, reaching for the couch, only to find it further away than you remembered. Without thinking, you leaned against Haechan instead. As you dozed off, he wrapped his arms around you, pulling you closer.

"Johnny, what's wrong?" The pretty girl next to him muttered. "Is everything alright?"

Johnny watched from the corner of his eyes as his friends helped Y/N up from her drunken stupor. Was she okay? "It's nothing, Jieun."

"I hope she's alright." Jieun muttered, arms still clinging to him. "She seems so drunk."

"Don't worry about her, babe." Johnny assured her. "Just relax and enjoy yourself."

"Why are you always protecting her?" Jieun released a soft sigh.

"Because she's special to me." Johnny answered simply.

He gave her a small smile before turning his attention back to his friends. He really missed the opportunity to spend time with his friends and Y/N.

He sighed. Of course he missed her. Even though he hadn't been able to spend much time with her lately, whenever they were together, they always had fun. She was kind and caring. Whenever they hung out, he felt a sense of comfort wash over him. It wasn't until tonight that he realized how lucky he was to have her in his life.

In the beginning, it was all easy. They met at a party thrown by their classmates. Since Johnny had recently moved to Seoul, most of his friends struggled to communicate with him. So when his friend Jaehyun told him about the event being held by another foreign exchange student, he figured that it would be a good chance to meet new people. Little did he know that meeting Y/N would change his life forever.

They hit it off instantly, flirting shamelessly. They had no problem joking around and teasing each other. At first, it had been innocent, simple conversations, whether it was about the weather or their favorite movies. They stayed as friends since Y/N was currently in a relationship, but every once in a while, they still got together to hang out. On those occasions, they spent their time watching movies, going to karaoke bars, eating out, and shopping. They had mutual friends who always seemed to drag them along to the hottest clubs and parties.

Those times together were always memorable. He remembered the time when he helped Taeil and Y/N find an apartment together since they were going to be roommates. There were nights where Y/N had gotten sick from drinking too much, falling asleep on Johnny's chest. Or times when he found himself helplessly straddling Y/N as they snuck into his apartment. He never questioned the level of their intimacy; after all, Y/N was a beautiful, smart, and sweet girl. In return, Johnny was respectful of her relationships with other men.

But the thought of Y/N with anyone else made him physically ill.

For several months, things continued this way. Eventually, they both became more serious with their respective partners. When that happened, they had trouble finding time to see each other. The good news was that they'd grown closer, becoming each other's best friends. During those moments when they saw each other, they'd always make sure to give the other person plenty of affection. It was obvious that neither one of them wanted to lose their friendship. Still, it was difficult not to get hurt every now and again.

Johnny would often ask himself why he didn't act sooner.

What stopped him from telling Y/N how he truly felt? He knew that he was attracted to her, especially after seeing how they interacted together. She made him laugh, genuinely enjoying his humor. It was impossible not to notice how sexy she looked when she was laughing at his jokes. Plus, she smelled amazing. When he breathed in her scent, it reminded him of chocolate. Or strawberry ice cream. Something sweet and fruity that melted his heart every time he inhaled it. But still, he kept his feelings bottled up inside.

Today was no exception.

Seeing Y/N dress in that mini skirt and that top that accentuated her figure, he had to try hard to stop himself from kissing her senseless. Heck, he knew she had tattoos but at the time, there were only a few. Now she had a whole sleeve of them. All over her left arm. Most of them seemed quite intricate and detailed, depicting nature scenes, symbols, even people. She had an incredible eye for detail and, based on her art, Johnny guessed that she had a lot of patience. It was one of the many reasons why he loved hanging out with her. They could talk for hours, even if they had absolutely nothing in common. There was always an instant connection between them, almost as if they were two halves of a whole.

Johnny glanced over at Jieun, his current girlfriend.

No.

Just the girl that he’s currently just sleeping with.

Jieun was pretty, don't get him wrong. She had short hair and bright brown eyes, delicate features and a slender frame. But when compared to Y/N, she didn't stand a chance. Compared to her, Y/N seemed like a goddess. Y/N was tall, slender, toned in all the right places. She was tan, and had long, black hair that she often ran her fingers through. Not only did she possess all of the qualities that Johnny desired, but she also had a personality that stole his heart. For years, he had been silently pining for her. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't deny the fact that she was perfect for him.

But no matter how much he liked Jieun, he could never forget Y/N. The truth was that Y/N was just so different from everyone else. She never hesitated to show her true self, whatever that meant. Whether she was crying over a sad movie or dancing ecstatically at a club, he knew that she wouldn't lie to him or hold anything back. Her honesty made her extremely endearing. She was funny and carefree, and unlike some girls, she had a positive outlook on life. If it wasn't for Y/N, Johnny doubted that he would've made it through all the crap he went through during college.

No doubt, Johnny had fallen for her. But he refused to act on those feelings. To do so would be unfair to Jieun, despite them not really dating. More importantly, Y/N deserved someone better than him. Someone who actually appreciated her beauty and unique traits. She deserved someone who loved her unconditionally and showed it in every aspect of their relationship.

Johnny watched as Jieun struck up a conversation with the other party-goers. His attention went back to Y/N and how drunk she looked earlier. He wished that he could've done something to prevent her from embarrassing herself. Y/N was the last person he wanted to hurt.

The next thing you remember was waking up on the couch, your head resting on someone’s lap. Haechan was still sleeping soundly, and so were all of your friends except for Yuta. He was leaning against the wall, eyes closed. Everyone looked so peaceful.

"Ugh, my head." You moaned as you sat up. "This hangover is going to kill me."

"Can I get you anything?" Taeil asked, coming out of his bedroom. He looked around the living room, noticing that the people who didn't make it home last night, were all passed out on the floor or on the couch.

You rubbed your forehead, getting up and padding towards the kitchen. “Coffee, please.”

He handed you the mug and a pack of Advil. "Are you feeling better?"

"Just peachy." You replied sarcastically. "Not at all.”

Taeil laughed. "Don't worry, you'll feel better tomorrow."

As soon as he walked back into the living room to wake everyone up, you finished your mug of coffee and padded into your bedroom to freshen up. You went through your closet, trying to figure out what to wear. You needed to dress casual, since you planned on spending most of the day lounging around the house, drinking coffee and playing games. Unfortunately, you couldn't decide between wearing sweatpants or shorts. Finally, after much deliberation, you chose to pair leggings with a gray tank top. Once you were done, you wandered back into the living room to wait for everyone else to wake up.

You didn't need to wait too long. Before you knew it, Taeyong and Renjun joined you at the kitchen table with cups of coffee. Mark rubbed at his eyes, sitting up from the couch, Haechan stirred next to him.

“Where did you two sleep?” You asked Taeyong and Renjun, curious.

Taeyong gave you a pointed look. “Like on the floor. At least Yuta was against the wall.”

You grinned. "I'm surprised no one took over my bed."

"I'm surprised no one put you to bed," Yuta muttered as he joined the group.

"Haechan was hogging her on the couch." Mark sleepily muttered.

"I was going to help her to her room but then I got sleepy and she was sleepy," Haechan yawned. "So we both passed out on the couch."

"Who didn't go home last night?" You asked Taeil.

"Mark, Haechan, Renjun, Taeyong, and Yuta." Taeil replied. "Oh. Ten and Kun passed out on my bedroom floor."

“Haha. Let's go get breakfast once they wake up. What should we do today?” You asked the group of hungover men.

“Eat breakfast. Drink more coffee. Play video games. Whatever you want.” Kun shrugged, coming from Taeil's bedroom. He stretched and yawned loudly. “Today is a free day. We can do whatever you want."

“Okay, sounds good. Can I shower first?” You asked, rubbing your eyes.

“Of course. Don't take too long. We're waiting.” Taeyong smirked.

“Whatever.” You replied. You slowly trudged upstairs to your bedroom. Once you were inside, you stripped off your clothes, letting them fall to the floor. You slid under the warm spray of water and scrubbed your hair vigorously. Soon, you stepped out of the shower, toweling off your hair and wrapping the towel around your body. Then you pulled on a pair of black yoga pants and an old, faded red t-shirt. Once you were ready, you padded downstairs to grab your purse and keys.

Once you returned to the living room, you found everyone waiting for you. They all sat around the living room, sipping on their morning coffees.

"Alright, let's go get breakfast." You declared happily.

"Good idea." Yuta agreed, getting up from the couch. "Let's not waste another minute here."

"We don't need another minute." Mark commented, looking around the room.

When you arrived at your favorite restaurant, everyone piled out of the car, stretching and yawning. The restaurant was fairly empty, save for the employees. So, when the owner came up to greet you all, you smiled.

"Morning! Glad to see my favorite group of hungover college kids." She beamed, her arms wide opened.

You stepped into her arms. "Morning mom. Can you feed us now?"

"Anything for my favorite daughter." Your mom kissed your cheek, ignoring your comment that you were her only child. Your mom looked at the rest of the group. “Now what can I get for you hungover kids?”

“Your egg sandwiches, auntie.” Taeil muttered.

“Coffee.” Mark yawned. “Lots and lots of coffee.”

“Can I get toast, bacon, and fries, auntie?” Renjun asked.

"Oh, god, come on." Taeyong groaned, sitting down at a nearby table. "Just give me some coffee and bacon, I'll be fine. Please auntie."

After you placed your order, you settled down at the table, joining your friends.

"Why are we meeting here every morning?" Yuta yawned, taking a sip of his coffee.

"Because it's close to campus, you get free food and you know my mom loves you all." You shook your head, helping the staff pour everyone coffee or orange juice into their mugs and cups. You made your thanks, the staff smiling.

"One of the perks of being Y/N's friends," Kun laughed. "Free food from her mom's restaurant. Lucky us."

"True that." Taeil nodded, finishing off his egg sandwich. "Man, I love her mom's sandwiches."

"She makes the best ones." You agreed, stealing a fry from Renjun's plate.

A few minutes later, the rest of the food was delivered.

"Can I have your bacon and eggs?" Taeil asked, pointing at your plate.

You raised an eyebrow. "Do you really think you deserve to eat someone else's bacon?"

"Doesn't hurt to ask." He grinned, grabbing your plate. "But you can always share."

Everyone chuckled as you shoved a fry into Taeil's mouth.

"So where did Johnny end up going last night?" You asked suddenly. “I really didn’t see him last night. I mean I saw him before I passed out.”

"He didn't stay long." Mark answered. "Around midnight, he left with Jieun."

"Ah." You frowned. "Makes sense. They never stay long whenever I'm around."

"They probably just wanted to spend time together." Kun explained. "Jieun and Johnny were really cute together. She followed him everywhere he went."

"Did you ever tell him that you liked him?" Yuta asked you suddenly.

"What?" You blinked. How did Yuta know about that?

"You did flirt with him a little." Renjun reminded you. "At least, that's what I saw."

"Whatever." You rolled your eyes. "It was barely any flirting."

"Come on Y/N," Mark shook his head. "Johnny was staring at you the whole night before Jieun came."

"It's the tatts, Mark." You replied. "He was asking me about them earlier."

"Seriously though." Yuta continued. "If you like him, why didn't you ever say anything?"

"I thought he'd never notice me." You sighed, knowing that there was no way to escape the converstation. "I'm not the type of girl that guys usually like."

"Really?" Mark raised an eyebrow. "There's nothing wrong with you."

"It's the tatts, huh?" Taeyong muttered, looking at your tattooed arm. "I mean, I love a girl that has tatts."

"Guys will always find something to complain about." You nodded your head. “But thanks for that Taeyong.”

"Well," Renjun interrupted, chuckling slightly. "There's nothing wrong with your tattoos."

"Yeah." Haechan agreed. "They're pretty cool."

"I agree." Ten smiled. "And sexy as hell."

You blushed, ignoring everyone's laughter. But it wasn't long before you were in a conversation about your tattoos again. About how pretty you thought they were and about how unique each tattoo was. It felt good, having such amazing friends that were willing to talk about your ink. You knew it would probably never happen with other groups of guys you hung out with. Not because they didn't care, but because they were afraid to offend you. Which is why you weren't surprised when the subject turned to sex.

It was always sex with these guys.

Why were you friends with these sex-crazed guys?

"So..." Taeyong started, shooting a pointed glance at you. "Are there any guys here you want to bang?"

"Hear me out. I know he has a girl and I know someone's going to beat me up for saying it or even thinking of it," You decided to just tell the truth. You looked around biting your lip, making sure your mom didn’t hear you. "Johnny. He seems like a good fuck."

"Damn," Haechan raised his eyebrows. "Y/N and Johnny would be hot, to be honest."

"No shit." Renjun nodded. "They'd be the hottest couple on campus."

You rolled your eyes and laughed with the others. You and Johnny? If only that was possible.

He still has a girlfriend after all.

The days passed quickly. After hanging out with the group for breakfast, you usually went off on your own, doing homework or just spending time alone in your room. But one day, after lunch, you decided to join your friends again. This time you met up with Taeyong, Doyoung, Winwin, Xiaojun, and Jaemin.

You sat at the table, eating as everyone told you stories about who they hooked up with last night. You rolled your eyes when Taeyong started telling you about his drunken hookup with a girl named Minah.

"Drunk sex?" You scoffed, giving him a look. "Really?"

"Don't act like you haven't done that." Taeyong narrowed his eyes. "With as many times as you had drunken sex with Doyoung."

"Please don't bring that up. Every time you guys mention it, I feel bad." You groaned as Doyoung sputtered on his food. You reached out and patted his back. “But admit it Doyoung, the sex was good.”

"We don't mention it!" Taeyong responded to you, rolling his eyes at Doyoung’s reaction. "It's not our fault you're always horny!"

"Shut up. Just shut up." You threw your napkin at him, the others laughing.

You were surprised when the next person you noticed looking at you wasn't Xiaojun or Doyoung or Jaemin or even Winwin. Instead, it was your very handsome friend, Johnny. You didn't even know he would be here. He was out with others that were in his classes.

His dark brown eyes met yours across the room. There was something about the way he stared at you that made you blush. Your cheeks were hot. Even your ears felt hot. Why was this guy looking at you so intensely? And so much?

“Is there a reason why you’re staring at Johnny so much?” Xiaojun asked, leaning back in his chair.

You shifted uncomfortably in your seat. “Um…”

"She wants to fuck him." Jaemin muttered. "Renjun told me the other day."

"But then again, what girl doesn't want to fuck, Johnny?" You asked, shrugging your shoulders. "Jieun is one lucky bitch."

You tried not to look at him anymore. Because whenever you looked at him, your stomach would flip. He was just too beautiful. Too sexy. Too perfect. It didn't help that he was already famous for dating the popular girl. Not that you weren't popular.

No wonder every single girl kept trying to hit on him. You included. You've been fighting the urge to kiss him since you met him at that event you hosted with Mark for the foreign exchange students. But he still had a girlfriend. A serious girlfriend.

Yet, here you were, constantly looking at Johnny like he was a piece of candy that you desperately wanted. Or maybe like you were salivating at the sight of him. Yes, that sounded more appropriate.

Like you wanted to eat him alive.

You wanted to suck on his lips. Suck on his tongue. Slap his hard cock against your naked pussy.

God, you wish you could touch him. Touch his face. His arms. His chest. Hell, just touch his skin. To see if it was as soft as it looked.

Or if it was rough.

Maybe Johnny likes rougher sex than the girls he normally slept with. What do you know about him, huh? Nothing. And yet, you keep imagining yourself with him. Imagining how it would feel to lay beneath him, letting him fuck you from behind. Thinking about how incredible it would feel to take his load all over your face. Or maybe deep inside you. The possibilities were endless. You just couldn't seem to stop thinking about him.

Your friends didn't know about the way you fantasized about him.

At least, they hadn't said anything. Yet.

"Ah, fuck." You let out a sigh, running a hand through your hair. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.”

Doyoung gave you a concerned look. “You okay, Y/N?”

You nodded in reply.

You were seriously losing control. That was a first. For as long as you could remember, you had been able to hold yourself back from acting on your urges. The fact that you had no self-control around him should've made you realize you shouldn't be with him. It should make you run away. But instead, your heart yearned to feel his body pressed against yours.

Why? You wondered. Why did you keep wanting him?

You took another bite of your salad, listening to your friends talking amongst themselves. And once again, Johnny’s name was brought up.

“Yeah, I heard he spent most of the weekend with Jieun.” Xiaojun said casually.

You sighed softly, hoping that he wouldn’t ask any questions about it.

The next week was rather uneventful. Since it was your last year of college, you have stayed late almost every night studying or doing homework. Sometimes, if your apartment was occupied, you would go to Hendery’s, Jeno’s or Yangyang’s rooms and study there since they often partied, playing sports or going to the gym. So you were surprised when Wednesday afternoon found you walking back to your apartment alone.

As you approached your building, you noticed Johnny standing near the front doors. Of course he was there. No doubt he had been waiting for you.

His posture screamed 'alpha male'. All six feet one inch of him stood rigidly, like he was prepared to strike at any moment. And the muscles in his arms and chest were clearly defined under his tight black shirt. Damn. You wanted to get closer to him, to see if those bulging biceps were real.

You swallowed nervously. How does a girl like you even get a chance to meet the guy that every other girl wants? What makes you different from all the rest? You were one of his best friends that's for sure.

You watched as he began talking to someone. A girl. And she seemed to respond well to his attention. She smiled as he leaned down to speak to her. She giggled. She touched his arm lightly. She probably thinks she's special. Probably thinks that he's interested in her. As if.

But he looks happy. Smiling. Even talking to her. Ah, this must be Jieun, the girlfriend. She was actually really cute. Much prettier than you expected her to be. Short hair cut in a layered style. Brown eyes. And a small nose.

The way his gaze lingered on her for a few moments longer than necessary, she seemed to be flattered. She leaned into him, wrapping her arms around his waist and squeezing him tightly. Her head resting on his shoulder as she gazed at him with longing. It was then that you realized that he was completely oblivious to your presence.

What was wrong with you? Why are you watching them like that? Why can't you turn away? God damn it! Stop acting like some sort of pervert.

You cleared your throat. Maybe he won't notice you if you ignore him. It worked the last time. Didn't it?

But to your dismay, he did.

"Hi Y/N!" He said cheerfully, looking up and meeting your gaze. "I've been waiting for you."

Oh god.

"Hey Johnny," You forced yourself to say. Your voice came out low and shaky. You struggled to find your words. Suddenly, you felt like an awkward teenager again. Like your face was on fire.

Johnny nodded towards Jieun, causing her to frown slightly. Then he shot you a mischievous smile. "Let's go up."

It took everything you had to push past him and enter your building. Thankfully, Jieun left before you reached your apartment door. You were grateful. You didn't need her prying questions right now.

Inside your home, you stood in the living room, suddenly feeling extremely nervous. Taeil wasn’t home yet, so you felt a bit nervous that you were left alone with Johnny. This had never before. Why all of a sudden were you feeling nervous in front of your best friend?

"Do you want a drink?" You offered nervously. "A soda or water? Wine?"

"A glass of red wine sounds nice." He replied without hesitation.

Relief flooded you as you hurried to the kitchen and opened the refrigerator. Thankfully, you had stocked the fridge earlier that day.

When you returned to the living room, Johnny was sitting on the couch, sipping his wine and watching TV.

He's so gorgeous. Why does he have to be so goddamn beautiful?

"So..." You started awkwardly. "How have you been?"

"Same old, same old." He shrugged. "What about you?"

You frowned. "Nothing new. Apart from hanging with the guys.”

He glanced at you quickly. Something passed between the two of you. Something strange. Something exciting. You squirmed in your seat, trying to focus on anything else besides the way his eyes smoldered at you. You felt like your whole world was going crazy. Everything around you became fuzzy. The way his voice sounded. The way his muscles flexed underneath his clothes. The way he gazed at you. Oh god.

Fuck.

Stop it. You chided yourself. This isn’t happening. Don’t give in to him. This is bad. Really bad.

“I’m glad we finally got to hang out tonight.” He said after a few moments of silence.

“Me too.” You replied, trying to sound nonchalant. “I mean, I guess I haven’t seen you since you’ve been busy with Jieun.”

Johnny nodded thoughtfully. “True.”

"You never talked about her." You pointed out quietly.

He grimaced. "We don't really talk about her that often."

"Do you like her?"

"Who?"

You exhaled sharply. "Jieun. Do you like her?"

Johnny furrowed his brows. "Why do you ask?"

You hesitated, wishing you hadn't brought it up. "Well...you look pretty happy when you're with her."

He smiled briefly. "It's complicated."

"Are you two together?" You questioned. "Is that why you always sit with her during class?"

"Well, we're definitely close." He said simply.

And then, he was silent.

“Isn’t she your girlfriend?” You blurted out. “Shouldn’t you spend time with her instead of me?”

He cocked his head to the side. “No, we’re not together.”

“Really?” You felt relieved. Thank god.

Johnny laughed. “Of course. We aren’t dating. We’ve slept together a few times but we’re not dating.”

You breathed a sigh of relief. Good. At least he was being honest. You tried not to think about what kind of relationship they had. What kind of relationship they had had. But you couldn’t help but notice how they interacted with each other. The way they looked at each other. How they held hands.

“Was my best friend jealous?” Johnny peered at your face, a smile on his lips. “Because I could swear that you were staring at us.”

“I was not!” You denied. “There was nothing to stare at.”

He rolled his eyes. “Don’t try and deny it.”

“No, I’m telling the truth. There was nothing to stare at.” You insisted.

“Sure there was.” He grinned, taking another sip of his wine.

“Trust me. There was nothing.” You responded forcefully. “There was no reason for me to watch you and Jieun together. You weren’t kissing or anything.”

“Really?” His expression grew serious. “What if I asked you to kiss me right now? Would you?”

“Fuck, Suh.” You burst out. “That’s impossible. You know that, right?”

“But would you want to?” He persisted. “Would you kiss me right now if I asked you?”

“I…” You stopped.

How the hell was you supposed to answer that question?

This conversation was turning into something you never expected it to be. Was it really just a friendly request or something more?

And what would your friends say if they saw you two making out in the middle of the living room? If they saw you grinding against him on the couch?

“God dammit.” You groaned, slumping back onto the couch. “Johnny, what the fuck are you doing to me?”

“Hmmm?” He peered at you curiously.

“Why does this have to happen?” You groaned, trying hard not to panic. “What are you trying to do to me?”

He gave you a playful smile. “I'm not doing anything to you.”

Your shoulders slumped in defeat. “Then why am I feeling this way?”

“Because you want me.” He replied simply. “Because you’re attracted to me. Because you can’t resist me. Because you feel something when I look at you.”

His confession sent shockwaves through your body. You sat motionless on the couch. Unable to comprehend what he just told you. Unable to believe him.

“Are you attracted to me too?” You whispered. “Is that why you keep looking at me?”

Johnny stared at you silently for several seconds. Then he grabbed your hand and squeezed it gently.

“Yes. Yes, I am.” He confirmed.

You gaped at him.

“Really?” You repeated hesitantly.

“I'm not lying to you.” He assured you. “I want you. I want you so badly that I can barely breathe sometimes. But if I tell you that, will you run away? Will you break our friendship because of this?”

“No.” You answered instantly. “No. I’d never do that. I wouldn’t even be able to think straight. Not to mention the fact that the guys would kill me.”

He chuckled. “Why’s that?”

“They know that I have a thing for you.” You admitted. “They see the way I look at you. They tease me about it all the time. I guess it’s easier for them to accept it if they knew that I’m attracted to someone who likes me back. Someone who I can be myself around. That’s why they won’t mind if we date. As long as I’m with someone who accepts me.”

He grinned. “Yeah, you’re right.”

“So…what should we do?” You asked tentatively.

He raised his eyebrows. “About what?”

“Um…this.” You gestured towards yourself. “This attraction between us. It seems like we both want it. So…is it possible that maybe we could…I don’t know…do something about it? Maybe meet up somewhere private? Or at least have sex. In my bed? On your couch?”

Johnny’s eyes lit up. “You want to have sex with me?”

“Fuck, Johnny.” You ran your hand through your hair, noticing his eyes on your tatted arm. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Like what?” He murmured huskily. “Like I'm going to take you upstairs and rip your clothes off? Like I'm going to shove my cock inside you and fuck you until you scream?”

You moaned. Fuck yes. That's exactly what you want.

“Don’t you want to?” He pressed. “Don’t you want me to make love to you? To touch every inch of your skin? To lick your nipples and suck on your breasts?”

You bit your lip.

“Fuck. Please stop talking. Just fucking fuck me already.” You moaned, unable to contain your arousal any longer.

He smirked. “All right. All right. But just to warn you. I plan on treating you like the goddess that you are. Every part of your body is going to feel good to me. I’ll make sure you come over and over again.”

A fire ignited within you. This is exactly what you needed. Exactly what you wanted. The idea of getting fucked by him sent a thrill throughout your body. You loved hearing him say those words to you. Words that only a man like him could utter. And knowing that you wanted to have sex with him didn’t hurt either. It made you feel incredibly desirable.

“Tell me. Tell me what you want me to do.” Johnny said softly.

“Do whatever you want.” You replied breathlessly. “Just please. Make me cum.”

He chuckled. “If that’s what you want.”

You nodded eagerly. A devilish grin formed on his lips.

He stood up from the couch. Grabbing your hand, he pulled you up from the sofa. With one swift move, he tossed you over his shoulder.

He strode quickly towards the staircase. You shrieked, clutching at his shirt tightly. You kicked your legs wildly, desperately trying to escape from his grip.

Johnny was much stronger than you realized. Within seconds, he had thrown you down onto your bed. With one quick movement, he jumped on top of you. Your heart thundered against your chest.

He leaned forward, pressing his lips to yours. Kissing you fiercely.

Your body responded instinctively. Your pussy throbbed, begging for attention. Your nipples hardened beneath your shirt, yearning for a hard squeeze.

As his tongue probed into your mouth, his hands slid underneath your shirt. Pushing it up and off your shoulders.

His warm fingers trailed over your skin. Sending chills throughout your entire body. His lips trailed down your neck, licking and sucking at your sensitive flesh. Every single movement was driving you wild.

Every stroke of his tongue and caress of his fingertips set you on fire. You were soaking wet, longing for him to take you. For him to fill you with his cock. To give you the pleasure you deserve.

The moment his fingers brushed against your nipple, you let out a moan.

You arched your back, thrusting your breast towards him.

He chuckled. “God, Y/N. Are you trying to kill me?”

He grasped your bra, tearing it apart with ease. Your nipples sprang free. He rubbed his thumb over them, sending shocks of pleasure coursing through your body.

“Oooohhhh, Johnny.” You moaned.

He grinned wickedly. “Does that feel good, baby? Do you like it when I play with your tits? When I suck on your nipples?”

“Yessss.” You gasped. “More. More. Fuck.”

“Oh god.” He groaned, biting down gently on your nipple.

He continued to flick his tongue across your other nipple, flicking harder each time. Your cries became louder. You felt like you were going to explode. It took everything in you not to reach down and unzip his pants.

Instead, you threw your head back and wrapped your arms around his neck. Tugging at his hair as he teased your nipples. Moaning loudly whenever he touched your skin.

Johnny smiled. He licked his lips hungrily, giving your breasts one last slow suck before letting go.

Leaving you panting for air.

“I've got to be honest with you, baby.” He breathed, pushing himself up onto his knees. “You taste amazing. Better than anything I've ever tasted before. And there's nothing else I'd rather do right now than to spend hours tasting every inch of your gorgeous body. Touching you. Kissing you. Licking you. And slowly entering you. Until I fill you with my cum.”

“Mmmmm. Fuck yes.” You whimpered, your voice sounding like an echo in the empty bedroom.

“Now where were we?” He asked slyly. “Ahh yes, your tits. Did you want me to suck on them some more? Maybe eat you out while I played with your tits?”

“Yes.” You breathed. “Please. Oh god, yes. Please.”

He chuckled. “Anything for you, baby. Anything.”

Slowly standing up, he began to strip off his shirt. Each piece of clothing was removed with great care. His tattoos were displayed prominently. They looked beautiful as always. The sight of them caused you to sigh in appreciation.

Once his shirt was completely gone, he leaned forward, placing a tender kiss on your stomach.

“That's better.” He whispered. “Now you're ready for me.”

His hands sliding your pants off. His lips kissing the insides of your thighs. Caressing your inner thigh with every kiss. Leaving you quivering with desire.

“Fuck!” You cried out. “Stop teasing me. Please. Just fuck me. Now!”

“Shhh.” He whispered. “Not yet. Not yet. There's still so much left to do first. Don't worry. You'll get what you need soon enough.”

Your hands dug into his hair, pulling his face closer to your pussy. You moaned loudly. The sounds of your pleasuring filling the room. His hot breath tickling your inner thighs. Your panties drenched with your juices.

Johnny looked up at you, his dark eyes darkened with lust.

“Look at me. Look how beautiful you are.” He said huskily. “Watch me taste you. Watch as I rub my tongue over your clit. See how good it feels. Know that I'm doing it to you. That I want to eat you out so badly.”

He gripped your hips, tugging you upwards. Opening his mouth wide. Licking your entire pussy, slowly spreading your juices.

Lapping at you slowly, teasingly. Going lower and lower until his tongue found your swollen clit. Pressing hard against it, rubbing his tongue in circles.

“Fuuuck.” You cried out. “Johnny! Johnny!”

“Such dirty talk, baby.” He said with a laugh. “Let me hear it. Let me hear you beg for me to make you cum. I want to hear you screaming for me.”

You clawed at his back, trying to pull his face deeper into your pussy. Screaming obscenities. Making animalistic sounds. Biting down on your pillow as he gave you all the pleasure you deserved.

Finally, his tongue plunged deep inside your pussy. Flicking over your clit in rapid succession. Sucking on it and flicking it. Pulling away occasionally to tease you. Tasting your juices. Giving you an extra burst of pleasure every time.

His pace increased rapidly. Pulling away for brief moments only to return immediately. Giving you even more pleasure than you expected. Soon you were trembling, nearing the point of no return.

It took everything you had not to lose control. Your entire body was consumed by ecstasy. Your pussy contracting rhythmically around his mouth. Pumping his tongue inside you, trying to keep yourself from coming. From exploding with orgasmic bliss.

But you couldn't hold it anymore. You began to cry out. Your body shuddered.

Sensing your impending climax, Johnny stopped sucking on your clit. He withdrew his tongue, but kept his lips firmly pressed against it. Keeping your orgasm contained.

His hands remained firmly on your hips. Tugging at your hips, forcing your body further upwards. You cried out as you tried to pull his face back into your pussy. Trying to force yourself to cum.

You came with a loud scream, your entire body tensing. Johnny followed your lead, groaning loudly as you pushed your pussy back into his face. Your thighs squeezing tight around his head, pulling him tighter against your clit. Your entire body trembling violently. Spasms racking your body. Bringing forth the most intense sensation you had ever experienced.

Suddenly, he stopped. Letting go of your hips. Sliding off your sweaty body. Standing up from the bed. Looking down at you.

“Baby, I know you came, but I'm not done yet.” He said quietly.

Looking down at your spread thighs, he smirked. He began to undo his pants.

You panted, waiting impatiently for him to reveal his erection. You knew what was coming next. You knew this would be the moment of truth. Would he be able to satisfy you? Would he actually be able to give you the satisfaction you were craving?

With one swift motion, his erect cock sprung free. Your eyes widened, almost as if you were surprised to see it. You hadn't been expecting it to be that big.

And you weren't wrong. His cock was absolutely enormous. Longer than any penis you had ever seen. Bulging with potential. You wondered if he could possibly fit inside you.

If he would hurt you.

But you know he wouldn't.

You stared at his cock hungrily, staring at it in disbelief. In awe. You reached out tentatively, touching it lightly. Fingers shaking slightly. Shaking as they traced their way along its length.

You felt the weight of it in your hand. Thicker than any cock you had ever felt. Fuller than any dick you had ever seen.

Before you could fully appreciate his massive erection, he grabbed hold of your wrist. Moving your hand to the tip of his cock.

“Just think about it.” He said quietly. “Imagine how amazing it will feel. Just imagine the sensations running through your body. Imagine how incredible it will feel to have this inside of you. How much more powerful it will be than any dick you've ever had before.”

Thinking about how large his dick would feel stretching your pussy open. Knowing that once he penetrated you, he would never leave. He would be inside you forever. Bringing you so much pleasure.

Giving you such pleasure. Satisfying you so deeply. Giving you what you needed. Allowing you to finally release all your pent up sexual tension. Giving you the ultimate sexual experience.

Feeling overwhelmed with emotion, you placed your lips against the head of his cock. Your tongue darting out. Drawing the warm liquid from his shaft. Overwhelmingly delicious.

Moving down, your lips parted. Your tongue sliding out of your mouth. Stretching out towards his cock. Swirling around it like a tiny tornado. Slickly coating his member with saliva. Getting him nice and wet. Allowing you to slide it further inside your mouth. Gently sucking on it, making sure to take it all in.

“Fuck.” He growled. “Oh fuck. You are so fucking sexy. So beautiful.”

Smiling brightly, you returned his compliment. Leaning forward, your tongue moved further into his crotch. Taking him even deeper inside your mouth. Tongue twirling around his thick base. Up and down the full length of his shaft. Playing with his balls. Feeling the resistance of his perineum.

Slowly moving back up to his tip. Taking him deeper inside your mouth again. Working your way down, taking him all the way to the bottom. Running your tongue along the underside of his shaft. As you slid back up to the tip, you sucked on it gently.

He groaned loudly, reaching out to grab hold of your head. Pushing you downwards so he could sink even deeper into your throat. Your nose pressed against his pubes, inhaling the musky scent. Sucking on his cock like it was a popsicle. Gagging a little bit. His thick length hitting the back of your throat with each movement.

Panting heavily, he held your head firmly in place. Gasping for air as he let out another moan. His dick pulsating wildly inside your mouth. Fluid seeping out of the end of his cock. Massaging your throat. Causing it to tingle pleasantly.

As he released his grip, you released his cock from your mouth. Pausing for a moment to catch your breath. Smiling happily at him. Proud of yourself for being able to handle his huge cock.

He smiled back at you. Reaching down, his fingers wrapping around your chin. Pulling you close to him. He kissed you passionately. Wrapping his arms around you. Holding you tightly. He tasted wonderful. His scent intoxicating. His warmth reassuring.

Gripping your ass tightly, he pulled you onto his lap. Sitting you down onto his hard cock. Watching as it filled your pussy. Slowly slipping inside of you.

Stopping halfway inside you, he gently lifted you up. Removing his erection from your pussy. Grinning as he laid you down on the bed. Positioning himself between your legs. His hard cock positioned at your entrance.

Pulling back slightly, he looked down at you. Seeing the desire in your eyes. Waiting for him to thrust his thick cock inside of you.

Taking a deep breath, he gripped your waist tightly. Slowly pushing forward. Delving inside of you. Feeling you wrap your legs around him. Tightening them around his body. Moaning loudly as he filled you completely.

Releasing his grip on your waist, he grabbed hold of your wrists. Placing them above your head. Hanging limply as he slowly fucked you. Gently pumping his cock into you.

Grinding your hips against him. Panting as you struggled to breathe properly. Wanting desperately to touch his cock, to stroke it. To watch it twitch in your hand. But he didn't allow you to do anything. He continued to thrust into you. Stroking his dick as fast as he could.

“Please.” You begged. “I need you to come inside of me. Please.”

Chuckling, he responded. “Not yet, sweetheart. Not just yet.”

His words spurred you on. Suddenly wanting nothing more than to feel his load splatter inside of you. Needing to feel his seed filling your pussy. Pouring into your body. And you would love every minute of it. Every single second.

He suddenly pulled out of you. Rolling over onto his back. “Climb on top of me. Put your tits in my face. I want to suck on them while you ride me.”

Lifting your ass, you quickly straddled his naked body. Hooking your fingers behind his neck. Settling yourself down onto his hard cock. You moaned loudly as you impaled yourself on him. Your hips bucking back and forth.

Johnny gripped your breasts, tugging on your nipples as you rode him. Squeezing your nipples hard. Twisting them as you slammed your pussy down on his dick. Slowly increasing the speed. Riding him faster and harder until he felt the familiar pressure building up inside of him.

“Hang on baby. Hang on. I'm going to come. Oh god.”

Moaning loudly, you brought yourself closer to climax. Johnny's dick pounding your walls relentlessly. Your whole body shuddering uncontrollably.

Feeling his climax building, Johnny wrapped his arms around you. Holding you tightly. Ensuring that you remain steady. Bringing you closer to release. Kneading your breasts, milking them roughly. Pleasuring them until you were completely overcome by pleasure.

Your orgasm ripping through your body. Crashing down upon you with relentless force. Sweeping you away into an ocean of pure bliss.

He moaned loudly, holding you tight. Panting heavily as he came inside of you. Your pussy gripping him tightly. Keep his semen within you. Silencing his lustful thoughts. Pushing them away, allowing him to rest peacefully.

Holding you closely, he watched as your climax slowly faded away. You lay on his chest, your breathing still erratic.

“So good.” You breathed softly.

“So fucking good.” He agreed. “That was the best. The absolute best."

"The best sex I've had in a long time." You let out a small laugh. You heard the front door of your apartment opening and closing, hearing voices talking about Johnny's coat and shoes. Someone, sounded like Taeyong, laughing at how you and Johnny finally fucked.

"I can hear you guys!" You yelled.

Johnny chuckled. "So I guess the guys are right outside, and they know exactly what happened."

Groaning, you buried your face into Johnny's shoulder. "I can hear Renjun and Haechan asking me all sorts of questions."

Smirking, Johnny spoke. "We can just tell them that the hot tattooed people are finally a couple."

"A couple?" You asked, lifting your head up. "Are you saying what I think you're saying?"

"Well, I originally came to see you tonight because I was on a mission." He laughed. "Will you be my girlfriend, Y/N?"

Laughing loudly, you hugged him tightly. "I'd love to be your girlfriend, Johnny."

Letting out a sigh of relief, he relaxed against you. "Thank god."

He mumbled, resting his head against yours. Breathing in your lovely scent, he listened to the sound of your heart beating. "This is the first time I've been with someone I really care about. So I don't want to mess it up. It has to work."

Snuggling against him, you smiled. "Don't worry. We'll figure it out together."

"Can I tell you something?"

"Yes." You answered, curious to hear what he was going to say.

"I love you." He told you. "And you need to know that."

"I love you too." You mumbled, running your fingers through his messy hair. "Forever."

He closed his eyes, biting his lower lip. A mischievous smirk appeared on his lips. He looked down at your tattooed sleeve, running his finger over a sunflower one. "I really love this design. What does it mean?"

You chuckled. "Sunflowers remind me of you."

Johnny froze, looking down at your tattoo.

You were shocked to see tears forming in his eyes. But you didn't have time to worry about it because he immediately placed a tender kiss on your lips.

Your heart fluttered wildly at his actions. Never had you felt so alive.

So happy.

So loved.

You hugged him tightly.

"Remember when you used to tease me about getting tattoos?" He asked you, giving you a sheepish smile. He caressed your cheek. "Remember when I told you I wouldn't get another one unless you joined me?"

"Yup." You nodded. "What happened to getting one with me?"

"I eventually got it with Taeyong and Yuta since I wasn't sure whether you wanted one with me or not." Johnny explained. "I'm still waiting to get one with you."

"What if I gave you the tattoo?" You offered, tracing his shoulder tattoo. "One of my designs so it's like you're taking me with you anywhere you go."

"I would love to be inked by you." Johnny whispered, turning his gaze towards you. "Anywhere you want."

Your breath hitched. This is exactly what you wanted.

You could only imagine the gorgeous tattoos you would create together. They would be so incredibly beautiful. A masterpiece. You would cherish them forever.

It would also make you feel special. Knowing that no matter where you went, Johnny would always carry part of you with him. Always be thinking of you. Remembering you. Cherishing your creations.

You didn't know how you could express how grateful you were for his words. Or for him choosing you. Loving you. Being with you.

All you knew was that you were going to treasure these feelings for as long as possible.

#nct #nct stories #nct fanfic #nct imagines #nct 127 #nct smut #nct johnny #johnny #johnny suh #johnny seo

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tripthelightfandomtastic · 1 year

Text

Rebel Yell -D.R.W

Author's Note: I am so happy to finally be able to put this out, this story took me ages but I am so very proud of it. Am I projecting here? Maybe. But hey, I too am living for the single life.

Synopsis: A shitty party gets turned around after a playful game of spin the bottle.

Word Count: 8.5k (you asked for it!)

Warnings: 18+ MINORS NEED NOT INTERACT. Alcohol, mild violence, foul language, rough sex, choking, spanking, slight domination, oral, fingering, raw doggin’ (wrap it before you tap the hottest guy at the party.) Smut but make it Danny with eyeliner.

Pairing: Tattoo!Danny x Female Reader

Have you ever even been to a party where you had a genuinely good time? One without awkward conversations with people you hardly know, one that matches the high expectations for a night that only happens in movies, or one where you have a few drinks and don't feel like vomiting all over the friend's car that drives you home? Well, this is worse than any party you've been to so far. Mainly because you're fucking ex and his friends are here.

You pound the rest of your drink from the plastic red solo cup of Malibu and coke, who fucking made that anyway? It'll have to do until you can get a baker's dozen of shots poured for you to even think about being in the same room as him. The music is loud and obnoxious and the tile of the kitchen is sticking to the bottom of your Docs, but, at least you're in the clear. Looking around for a familiar face you find one of your girl friends you came here with, Summer. She's walking with your other friend who looks like she's had way too much to drink and is making a b-line to the bathroom. You do not envy them in the least, you would go and help but the anxiety building inside of your chest needs to be dampened with more liquor.

Pouring yourself a more than hefty amount of tequila in your cup, you slam the whole double (most likely double and a half) shot down. You cringe and squeeze your eyes closed as you take a breath. You groan as the alcohol burns down your throat when you meet eyes with a guy across the room, some very tall drink of water with long dark curly hair, you saw him earlier in the backyard puffing on a joint with some long haired hippie wannabe looking friend with a stoner laugh to match.

You hold his gaze a moment in the crowded room, you think you saw smudged eyeliner on him earlier and had to keep yourself from nearly falling instantly head over heels for the bad boy in the black leather jacket and Church of Rock N Roll muscle tank. The combat boots and ripped black jeans with the chain hanging off his belt wasn't helping your cause either. He sends a small nod your way along with a subtle yet confident smirk that lights you on fire. You can't help but smile back, you can feel your heart race in your chest as you look away, keeping your cool as best as you can. You've been told before that people can read your mind based on the faces you make, subtlety not being your best quality.

At least you have positive qualities, unlike your ex, Ryan. You had been dating for about two years, your longest relationship to date and your first real boyfriend. It started out great, he was super sweet and funny, gentle and interesting. But he got distant, so distant in fact that he would almost never reply to your messages or calls until it was too late and you started seeing each other less and less. It wasn't until you were out with friends to dinner one night when you saw him there with another girl. Long story short, they had been talking for a while and hooked up a few times, poor girl had no idea you even existed. So yeah, the lying dick head was here and grinding on every girl in sight.

Being single again after so long has been feeling so foreign to you, almost like you were doing something you shouldn't, forgetting you have no loyalties to anyone anymore. So fuck it. Tonight, you were gonna have fun and flirt your ass off. Why shouldn't you?! It's been almost seven months since your messy breakup with Ryan, might as well have some fucking fun for the first time in a while. And hey, if you end up having some stupid one night stand, who cares? You're owed at least one good orgasm that's not by your own hand.

The music is thumping through the house and you've had enough to really feel the music and let your body talk for you. You make your way over to the makeshift dance floor and sway to beat. Closing your eyes and just allowing yourself to let go of the anxieties you were holding on to. You meet eyes again with that curly haired guy again through the crowded floor, damn he's good looking. He takes a sip of his drink, eyes not tearing away from you as you sway your hips up against some girl behind you. She laughs and begins dancing with you, she spins you around and you get lost in the song, your eyes only flitting away to the guy leaning up against the wall who keeps meeting your eyes, his conversation with the three other guys he's with be damned.

The crowd moves to the kitchen as someone brings up the idea of playing spin the bottle. It seems like the whole party has decided to gather in the kitchen, to play or just spectate around the round dining room table. You stand at the table and your stomach drops into your shoes when your ex is almost directly across from you. You move to leave when the hot guy you've been eyeing all night stands right beside you.

"Hey." The tall drink of water says accompanied with a smile that makes you mirror his expression. "Hi." You reply almost shyly, he's quite intimidating to be honest, maybe it's the bone structure or his clothes but something about his warm brown eyes that makes you feel safe to talk to. "Big fan of spin the bottle?" He asks. "I've never played." You answer, fiddling with your rings, your eyes take in his appearance now that he's right in front of you, his smudged eyeliner making your heart skip a beat, fuck he's hot.

"The rules aren't very difficult, I'm sure you'll be a natural at it." He teases, a smile pulling at your lips as he gets a chuckle out of you. "Well, if anything, I think it's a great way to make friends." You counter flirtatiously that makes the man smirk. "I'm Danny, by the way." He says introducing himself, finally giving a name to the gorgeous face, you extend your own introduction when all of a sudden a voice rings out, "Alright, fuckers listen up!" A guy begins to shout, holding up an empty beer bottle. "I don't care if you're gay, straight or anything in between! A spin is a spin! So either play or don't." The guy finishes before spinning the bottle, starting the game. You exchange a look to Danny who keeps his ground, ready to play, come what may.

The bottle spins several times with no real wild kisses exchanged. You're nervous for when it will land on you. The empty Dos Equis bottle is spun and the girl on the other side of you gets a kiss, prompting your turn to spin. You take a deep breath before and your bottle is spinning rapidly, you're practically sweating as the bottle begins to slow, coming to a stop on the long haired stoner guy Danny was talking to earlier. He's cute, tall, tan, with a sweet disposition, why not? The crowd around the table "oohs" as the stoner walks over to you.

He gives you a small but gentle kiss, his hand on your cheek, he tastes like tequila and weed, he smells like cologne and his lips are a little dry, probably cottonmouth. The kiss doesn't last long but the excitement from the kiss makes you buzz with confidence. The guy gives you a wink before walking silently back to his side of the table. You take your place back next to Danny, he whispers in your ear, "I see you've met Sam." He jokes, "Well Sam's a pretty decent kisser." You smile back, Danny gives you a chuckle before he looks back at the game unraveling ahead.

The bottle spins and spins for a few turns, you and Danny quip back and forth, passing the time and flirting a bit as the game rolls on. Danny even gets landed on by a friend of his, some shorter long haired guy who joined him by the wall near the living room dance floor. It's short but kinda cute to see two guys kiss without making a big deal about it, but instead joking about, "Who hasn't kissed their friends before?!" The friend laughs before going back to his spot, saying something in a very drunk and very fake accent.

The bottle takes a few more spins, you watch uncomfortably as your ex kisses some red headed girl for a little too long and gets a little too handsy, only egging on the crowd. You roll your eyes, crossing your arms and standing awkwardly. Danny gives you a look, tearing his eyes away from the scene ahead. "Will these two just get a room already?" He whispers to you. You can't help but show an uneasy expression, Danny must sense your discomfort because he asks you very gently, "Hey, you okay?" You nod quickly in silence, offering no reply. You look over at him, almost ashamed, "That's my ex." You say with a bitter taste left on your tongue. "Oh. Well he seems like a real stand up guy." Danny comments with a sneer, watching as Ryan practically sticks his entire tongue in the girl's mouth. It's like a train wreck, it's awful but you can't look away. A red solo cup is held in front of your face, "Here. You need it more than I do." He hands you the rest of his drink. From the smell of it, coke and fireball, which you happily sink the rest down, you sigh with a slight cringe as the drink slides down your throat. Danny brings his hand to your back comfortingly, "Good girl." He praises. That phrase shouldn't affect you the way it does but holy hell do you feel like a whole new woman. The pair finally disconnects and the game continues on.

Your friend Summer appears behind you tapping your shoulder. "Oh there you are! Danny! This is my friend Summer!" You can already hear the semi drunkenness in your voice as you're introducing her to Danny. He smiles charmingly, "Hi, it's good to meet you." He introduces himself, "Oh, hi." She smiles, but you notice she's got her purse and your other drunk friend in tow.

"We're leaving, Mari is a mess and I'm tired. Are you coming?" She asks, her keys jingling in her hand. They are your ride, but your night just got interesting. Fucking carpooling. You look back at the table and roll your eyes as you come to the realization that the party for you is probably over. "I mean, um, I guess-" "If you want, I can take you?" Danny interrupts, "If you don't wanna go, I can drive you later if you like?" His offer hangs in the air for a moment as you look at your friend, speaking practically telepathically with the other if that all sounds okay to the other. "Yeah. That would be great actually. Only if you don't mind, I don't wanna put you out-" "It's really no big deal." Danny assures you with a smile. Your friend shrugs, "Alright then. Just text me when you get home, okay?" Summer smiles at you knowingly. You widen your eyes at her turning your head so Danny doesn't see your obvious smile as she walks away.

"You really don't have to do all that for me, I can take an uber or something later." "It's really no bother. Besides, I'd hate for you to miss out on having a good time. I think you deserve it, especially since that asshole gets to, I think it's only fair that you do too." Danny smirks as he motions to Ryan. You smile, your heart thumping in your chest with excitement at the idea of Danny driving you home.

The game continues on and the guy next to Danny gets a kiss from some girl and it's Danny's turn to spin. You make accidental eye contact with your ex who just chugged the rest of his drink while his buddies laugh about something. It makes you practically freeze in an almost anxious fear until you hear the spinning glass begin to slow on the wooden table. The last rotations make its way around until the end of the bottle is pointed at you.

You take a moment to even realize it's pointing at you, you look up at Danny, he wears a face of 'I'm down if you are.' A small smile pulls at your lips, this was exactly what you were hoping for when you joined the game. You step forward shyly, Danny brings a hand gently to your chin, "Let's give 'em a show, huh?" He rasps against your lips, only quiet enough for you to hear. You nod before bringing your own hands to his chest, letting him take you to his lips. His lips slot gently against your own, you move in time with his lips. His hands venture down to your waist, pulling you close to his body, he's so tall it makes you feel like swooning here in his arms. The crowd hoops and hollers loudly as you let him slip his tongue in your mouth, your nails come to his back, clawing into the back of his leather jacket. He smirks against your lips, his hands wander down toward your ass, but stays respectfully on your lower back. You bite his bottom lip, grinning as you meet his eyes again, they're darker than before and you want nothing more than to keep kissing him.

You almost completely tuned out the woo’s of the party goers around you until now. You smirk at Danny, knowing damn well you put on a good show, and knowing even more that he's a great fucking kisser.

"Fuckin' slut." A scoff sounds across the room. You turn your head fast to the voice the comment came from. Ryan rolls his eyes as he toys with his empty red cup. Before you can say a word, Danny stands up straight, "What the fuck did you just say?" He asks, his voice is deep, completely sincere in his question and it commands the room in a way that makes Ryan look in his direction. He scoffs again, the crowd hums with whispered excitement, "Just funny is all, a little desperate I think." Ryan says. "It's just part of the game, dude." Danny laughs. “Danny, really, it’s fine.” You say quietly, you gain his attention and he looks upset. “No, I think he’s a fuckin’ asshole.” Danny says to Ryan and the rest of the party. Ryan steps closer, his gaggle of idiot friends behind him making their way through to the side of the table by you and Danny. Sam comes up silently behind you and Danny, getting ready to jump in if the situation calls for it.

“I just think maybe she and I broke up too soon, especially because she was never that freaky with me.” Ryan smirks at you, his friends laugh at his statement. Danny bows out his chest and looks down at Ryan who is only a few inches from meeting Danny’s eyeline. “Maybe you should learn to shut your mouth before it really gets you in trouble.” Danny threatens, his jaw is clenched as he stares Ryan down. “I’m not talking to you anymore, I’m talking to her.” Ryan says as he tries to walk past Danny and toward you, you take a step back, Sam places a hand on your shoulder to help guide you away from your ex while Danny puts an arm out, keeping you out of Ryan's reach. “I have nothing left to say to you.” You say, anger and anxiety adding a tremble to your voice. “We don’t have to talk, baby, what I have in mind doesn't require much talking.” He quips, your stomach churning at his words. “That’s enough.” Danny says firmly, putting a hand on Ryan’s chest, keeping him in his place.

“Get your fuckin’ hands off of me.” Ryan shouts as he pushes Danny but he hardly even moves. “Then leave her alone.” Danny’s voice is deep and threateningly quieter as he steps even closer to Ryan. He smirks over Danny’s shoulder to you, "Oh come on sweetheart, just one last kiss, huh?" Ryan shouts at you. Danny shoves Ryan backward, he falls back into his friends. Ryan’s face twists into a furious scowl as he lunges towards Danny with his fist, but he’s too fast. Danny dodges the hit and swings, punching Ryan right in the nose. It spews blood as Ryan falls flat on his back onto the sticky kitchen floor, his hand comes to his face and his friends are too frozen in shock to do or say anything. A harang of people gasping and shouting and cheering echoes through the kitchen and it feels like time stands still until Ryan shouts, “You broke my nose?! You broke my goddamn nose!”

“Then get the fuck outta here before I break your fucking legs!” Danny bellows at Ryan, his stance is intimidating and large as he leans over Ryan. Scrambling to his feet, Ryan stumbles as he gets up and to his buddies and begins heading for the front door. “Have fun with my left overs, asshole!” Ryan shouts over his shoulder. “You son of a bitch!” Danny shouts as he lunges forward, making a run for Ryan but Sam’s long arms grab a hold of his friend’s large frame first before he can even make it out of the kitchen, allowing Ryan and his posse of douchebags to run out the door.

“Hey man, chill out okay. Just let it go.” Sam says, calming Danny down before letting go of him. Danny turns to look at you, his intense glare of anger in his eyes softening as they settle on you before him. “Are you okay?” His voice is soft as his hands hold your arms gently, bending a bit to speak to you.

You blink rapidly as you try not to let the tears in your eyes fall. “Yeah, I’m uh, I just need some air.” Your voice cracks before you turn and walk out the back door to the backyard, letting the cool breeze of the night wind calm the heat of your embarrassed face. You look up and stare at the crescent moon in the sky, taking in a deep, yet shaky, breath and you can’t help but feel absolutely mortified by the scene that just transpired.

Fuck Ryan.

Fuck parties.

Fuck this.

“Hey.” A voice says gently, almost nervously behind you. You turn to find Danny coming out towards you. You turn back around and quickly wipe your eyes as you keep your arms crossed and your eyes trained up at the sky, dark clouds moving over the night sky and through the light of the moon. "I'm really sorry about all of that." Danny's voice is soft as he comes to your side. The thumping music from the party inside only makes you feel like curling up into a ball, never to be seen again. "It's fine. He's uh, yeah, he's not nice." Your voice is like a whisper, trying not to let it break as you hold back the tears that threaten to pull you down with them. "No, no he's not. I'm sorry." Danny apologizes again. "No I should be sorry, I feel like that was all my fault in there." You say, shaking your head. Danny's hand comes to your back, prompting you to look at him, "None of that was your fault-" "I should've just left when Summer said so. I knew he was here, him and his fucking friends. I hate that you got dragged into any of that. You don’t even fucking know me!" You say with a bewildered laugh as a tear rolls down your cheek. Your words hang in the cool autumn air for a moment before Danny speaks. "I think I know you enough to know that you're a really great kisser." He says with a smile, knowing that would make you forget about the whole Ryan thing, if only for just a second. You chuckle as you dry your eyes, "Oh my God, how could I forget." You smile at him, you can see his features perk up as you finally meet his eyes. "Besides, Ryan just seems like the kind of guy who deserves a punch in the face." He smirks pridefully as he thinks back to replay the look of shock on Ryan's face when he hit the floor.

"It was kinda cathartic to watch the hottest guy at the party deck my ex in the nose." You smile playfully, turning to take in all of Danny's gorgeous face. He smiles charmingly, "Well, I'm just glad I got to kiss the hottest girl at the party." He muses before giving you a look that only makes you want to kiss him again, and again and again. You move to step forward but let your eyes wander to the house, a handful of prying eyes from the fight in the kitchen looking intently at you and Danny's conversation, only reminding you of how you wish you could be somewhere more private.

"If the offer still stands, do you mind taking me home? I think I've had about enough of this party." You ask, crossing your arms to warm yourself from the evening breeze that seems to blow right through you. A smile pulls at Danny's lips, "Yeah I think I'm ready to go too, I'd say we made quite the impression though." He jokes before turning to leave, you walk along with him and head to his car.

Your hands run up and down your arms, trying to preserve whatever heat you can keep from escaping your thin long sleeve shirt. Before you even really notice, Danny pulls his large leather jacket off and places it over your own shoulders. "There." He simply says. You smile to yourself before turning to him as you both walk, the whole thing feels like it swallows you up, the sleeves so long your hands aren't even poking through. "Fits you better than me." He jests with an endearingly sweet look, his smile is contagious and you can feel your cold cheeks warming from the blush on your face. You bury your burning face into the collar of his coat, relishing in the mix of musk and cologne of the well loved jacket.

The ride to your place isn't too long, the conversation is easy and soon you're pulling up to your apartment. The silence in the car is heavy as you think of what to say next. "So-" "Do you wanna come inside?" You beat Danny to the punch, interrupting him. He meets your eyes with a look of subtle surprise, "I'd love to." He says, his voice low and soft in the confines of the car in a way that makes the butterflies in your chest explode.

You show Danny up to your apartment, you close the door and take off his jacket, "Thanks for letting me wear your coat." You say before handing it to him, "What kind of man would I be if I let you freeze to death in the cold?" He jokes before taking it from you, hanging it on your coat rack as you both take off your shoes. You laugh before walking off to the living room, sitting on the couch, Danny follows suit and sits beside you. You both smile fondly and comfortably at each other, unsure of what step comes next. A familiar anxious feeling in your stomach begins to stir, one that could be described as really overactive butterflies when in such close and intimate proximity with a hot guy alone with you in your apartment.

You cut through the silence with a scoff. "For the record, I just wanna say, you're a much better kisser than Ryan." You smirk, Danny chuckles, "I'm sure Ryan lacked in several departments." He smiles to himself, crossing his arms in pride. You stare up at the ceiling and huff a sigh. "Ugh, you have no idea." You wish you could say you had been in more of a slut era than you really were since your breakup, but honestly, it's been dry as hell. "That bad?" He cringes, bracing himself. "He was fine, just, I don't know, kinda… boring?" You reply, shrugging as you try and gently explain how your sex life for the last two years was less than satisfying.

"How bad was it?" Danny asks, you search the ceiling for a moment, Danny stirs next to you, sitting up straight, "I'm sorry, I don't mean to pry-" "No no it's fine! He just, uh, he just wasn't very um, creative?" You explain vaguely. Danny chuckles, "Creative?" He repeats with a smile, "Just that it was very vanilla I guess? He never really wanted to try anything new or different." "Sounds like he was pretty selfish." Danny extrapolates. "Oh absolutely. If it didn't end with him cumming first, he wasn't super interested." You explain irritatedly.

"He's an asshole." Danny snarks, you just chuckle a knowing laugh. "Most times I had to use my vibrator later when I got home." You cringe with a chuckle as you recount the many nights you spent with a toy between your legs. "What would you think of?" Danny asks softly, "Oh." You pause a moment in anxiety at the idea of having to speak your innermost fantasies to this gorgeous man before you.

Here.

Alone.

On your couch.

You could feel the blush creeping in on your cheeks. "I uh, I liked to think about… ya know, getting tossed around, someone being rough with me." You confess, unable to meet Danny's eyes as you mess with the rings on your fingers. "Mmm, I see now. He was too soft? Too boring?" Danny speaks with a smirk that lights you on fire. "Y-Yeah, I uh, I'd bring up the idea but, he never really did anything new, maybe he thought it was weird?" You shift in your seat, ready to hear the judgment in Danny's voice. To hear the same put off tone like Ryan had. Instead, he places his hand on your knee, you turn to finally look at him.

"I don't think it's weird at all. I like being rough." Danny smiles, you can feel the wave of relief washing over you. "Yeah?" You ask. "Mhm, to take control, to have a pretty little thing under me, letting me touch her all over, kiss her wherever, grab her however I want. Hear how good she feels." His voice feels like silk as he speaks, warming you all over. You can't think of a single thing that isn't a kin to 'fuck me', so you stay silent. You look over Danny's lips, he smirks at you as he moves closer.

"Tell me what you've been dreaming of, angel, because I know I am a much better listener than that prick ever was." Danny grins, you can't help the hitch in your throat at the nickname. "Lots of things." You whisper. Danny smiles, his hand runs up your knee to your thigh, his large hand radiates warmth through your jeans to your skin beneath, fuck his hands are big.

He leans in close, his cologne flooding your senses, his breath fanning gently over your lips as he brings his other hand to your chin, his eyes holding yours. "Did he never pull you onto his lap? Spank you over his knee? Squeeze his hand around your throat a little?" Danny asks, his finger under your chin holds you gently, your face is flushed as he tilts his head awaiting your answer. "Never." You whisper, your eyes practically begging his lips to yours, instead he runs his hand against your cheek, his thumb softly moves along your cheekbone. "Would you like that? If I did?" Danny asks softly, a rasp in his words sends a delicious chill down your neck. You nod embarrassingly quickly but it makes Danny chuckle at your eagerness. "Words, angel." He smiles.

"Yes, I'd like that very much." You say, a slight shake in your voice, you almost don't even sound like yourself, you're so desperate. "Good. Because I think you deserve a good fuck." Danny pulls you in, a soft kiss at first, softer than the one at the party but it doesn't stay sweet.

Your hands come to his face, to his hair, wanting to touch him where you've been dying to. Your kiss becomes more desperate, his tongue enters your mouth, your hands tug at his hair, he groans at the pull, smirking as he breaks the kiss, “Oh angel, that’s my job.” He teases before kissing you again, his hands on the small of your back brings you closer to him, bringing you on to his lap, he captures your bottom lip between his teeth making you moan. He pulls away, allowing you to grind down to feel his already hardening cock in his pants, you whimper out a pathetic sound at just the feeling of him near you.

“You sure?” Danny asks, breaking the bad boy persona a moment as he reads your face, “Take me to my bedroom.” You sigh as you roll your hips against his. Danny sighs at the feeling of your movements before he huffs a small laugh, “Where is your bedroom?” He asks, you laugh, “Down the hall to the left.” You smile. With no hesitation, Danny stands from the couch, you wrap your legs around his waist as he carries you to your room, his hands holding you close to him as he makes his way down the hall.

Your room is warmly lit, a gentle glow from your fairy lights and salt lamp you left on, Danny sets you down on your bed before looking around the room, “Cute.” He simply states, making you roll your eyes.

You go to take your top off, “Wait.” Danny interrupts, you stop your hands, dropping the material of your sweater. “Come here.” He says, you smile in response as you make your way over to him, clambering off the bed and standing in front of him. Danny brings his hands to the hem of your sweater, pulling the material over your head and off to be discarded to the floor. “Pretty girl.” He smiles, a rasp to his voice makes you blush as you stand before him in your bra. He undoes the button of your jeans, pulling them down your legs until you stand before him in just your underwear.

You stand before him, his eyes scanning your half naked figure, he gives you a ‘come hither’ motion with his finger, you walk up to him, your doe eyes looking up at him as his hands come to rest warmly on your sides. “So pretty.” He whispers, his voice bringing goosebumps to your skin. His hand trails down to your panties, his fingers running over the already dampened material. You sigh at the touch, “Mmm, already so wet for me. Aren’t you such a good girl?” Danny praises, his lips right against your ear as he speaks, your heart nearly jumps out of your rib cage at his words. “Just for you.” You breathe, Danny smiles, kissing your neck.

He pulls away, his hands come to his own shirt, pulling his church of rock ‘n roll tank top off, tossing it alongside your own discarded clothes. You watch astounded at the beauty of his body, the dark ink of the tattoos you never saw are revealed as he peels the tight black jeans from his body, leaving him clad only in a tight pair of black briefs, the outline of his dick takes your breath away.

Danny pulls you to him in a gentle kiss, he pulls away after a moment, taking you by the hand and leading you to the bed. He sits on the edge of the bed, he pulls you on to his leg, you sigh at the contact. “Wanna watch you ride my thigh, show me how bad you want it.” He says, his hands on your hips, pulling you down onto his muscular thigh, making you whine.

You roll your hips down against him, a moan rolls out of your throat as you grind down, you place your hands on his shoulders as you move, his hands come down to your ass, dull nails digging into the softness of your muscle. “That feel good, angel?” Danny asks teasingly, you offer a hum as you chase the feeling building up in your lower stomach, “Tell me baby, tell me how you feel.” He smirks, his grip tightening and pulling you to rock against him harder and faster, “Ah, fuck, so good.” You whine. “Yeah?” Danny asks, his hand coming down hard on your ass, you yelp out in shock, the stinging a delicious blend of pain and a euphoric sensation that only makes you wetter. “How good?” He asks, looking at the way your eyes have widened and the way your mouth hangs open, his hands gripping tightly, “So fucking good, oh god.” You cry out.

Danny brings his hand behind your back, unclipping your bra and pulling you closer to him, his lips latching around one of your nipples. You moan as you rock back and forth on his thigh, his teeth grazing your nipple, his other hand gripping the small of your back, encouraging you to move. The wetness in your panties and the friction on your clit against Danny's muscular thigh, feels like nothing you've ever felt before. He pulls away from your chest, his hands pull you to him as he flips you onto the bed and lies you on your back, manhandling you and laying between your legs. He kisses you hard before sitting back on his heels, a shining wet spot on his thigh tattoo catches your eye, making you blush. “You need it bad, huh, baby?” He teases, grinning at the wetness on his thigh.

"God yes." You sigh. He looks so dreamy under the lights like this, like an angel with his curly hair catching the warm lighting from the salt lamp. The golden hue makes his skin look so soft and warm and you cannot wait to feel him. "Then let me give it to you." He smirks, his hands come down to your panties, he gives you one last look for permission that you immediately grant him before pulling them down.

You can’t stop the instinct of closing your legs out of shyness as Danny tosses your panties to the side, Danny laughs a moment at your coyness. “Oh, baby, don't act shy now. Spread your legs for me, sweet girl, show me what a good girl you are.” Danny’s voice makes you sigh, no one has ever talked this way to you before, you keep your eyes on him as you slowly open your legs. Danny’s eyes travel down to your glistening core and subtly palms himself over his briefs, only making you wetter at the sight. “Fuck angel, you are dripping.” His voice laced in seduction as his hands come to your thighs, spreading you wider.

“So fucking gorgeous, all laid out for me. I want a taste.” His proposition makes your eyes widen. “Fuck yes please. I haven’t…” Your voice trails off making Danny look at you with an air of confusion, “Haven’t what?” Danny’s voice in that perfect mocking tone that makes your brain hazy. You can’t help but blush and look away before answering him.

“I um, I’ve never really cum from… oral before.” You confess. Danny almost looks pained by your statement. “Never?” he asks as his hands softly wander up and down your thighs. “My ex didn’t do that much.” You say nervously, Danny brings his hand closer to your core making your breath hitch, he leans in close to you, his face inches away from your own, eyes boring into yours. “With a pussy as perfect as yours, I don’t see how he wasn’t between your legs all hours of the day.” Danny whispers as his hand slowly glides down to your center, you sigh as his fingers bring your wetness up and around your clit, making you moan. Danny smiles as he watches your expression change as his fingers roll slow wide circles over your clit, your mouth hanging open.

“Let me take care of you, pretty girl.” He says softly before kissing your neck, down your chest, your stomach, kissing his way down all the while his fingers play with your clit. Danny lays down on the bed, he watches as his fingers make a mess of you. “If it ever becomes too much, just say Metallica, that’s the safeword.” He explains, you simply nod. “No angel, I need to hear it. Be a good girl and repeat it so I know you understand.” “M-Metallica, yes, I-I understand.” You stammer out, “Good girl.” Danny grins before kissing your inner thigh, heading closer until he removes his hand from your clit. You take a deep shaky breath as Danny’s breath warms over your folds, his warm tongue licking languidly up to your clit. You sigh a moan as he takes his time, licking slowly along the sensitive bud, your hands clawing at the duvet beneath you.

Danny’s mouth moves faster, lapping up at your soaking wet pussy. He moans against your core, making your back arch, “Fuck, Danny.” You moan, Danny brings his hands to wrap tightly at your thighs, gripping you to him, holding you in place as he eats your pussy. The delicious sounds of Danny’s mouth makes you whimper at the beautiful lewdness of it all. “So fucking sweet,” it was muffled but you just barely registered it from Danny, like it was never even meant for you to hear but you did and fuck that was hot. “Oh fuck, holy fuck.” You cry out, your eyes rolling back in your head as you clutch tighter at the balled up comforter beneath your writhing body.

Watching as Danny’s mouth works over you, the way his large hands hold you open for him and the way his nose nudges against your clit as he tongue fucks your weeping pussy has you moaning and your legs shaking uncontrollably. The prideful smirk you catch on Danny’s features makes your breathing more uneven than before, because he is so fucking good at this and the way you’re moaning is making him want you to cum even more. “Oh god Danny. Fuck, I’m gonna-oh fuck I’m cumming, oh fuck.” You moan out as Danny latches his lips around your clit, sucking on the bundle of nerves that has you clawing onto anything that can hold you as your orgasm takes root in you. Your hands come to Danny’s hair as your hips attempt to buck, but the firm grip he has on your thighs, move to your hips, pinning you down as his tongue fucks you hard and fast into the most intense orgasm of your life.

Danny’s name and a string of other expletives fill the air until you’re hit with a wave of pleasure so hard you can’t make a sound. Your body goes rigid, your grip in Danny’s curls is tight and rough, only making him groan against your core which feels like it's sparking like a live wire. Then something inside of you snaps and you can breathe again, uneven and labored breaths as you try to make sense of the bliss you just felt from this man you’ve only know for a matter of hours could make you feel like this, a million times better than a guy you were dating for two years could have ever dreamed.

His tongue slows to a stop as you come down from your climax, “H-Holy shit.” You huff out, you're in awe and just staring at your ceiling. If that’s what he can do with just his mouth, then you have to know what else he can do.

You sit up and look at him with a look of insatiable lust. He smirks as he sits up and wipes the shine of wetness from his lips and chin with the back of his hand. “Oh angel, you look like you need more.” He teases as he sits up on his knees, the very prominent outline in his briefs pulls your attention away. “Please.” Is all you’re able to say. “I saw you sizing me up earlier, baby. I know you’re not as innocent as your boy toy thought you were.” Danny grins as he moves closer to you, his hand resting on the thigh of your spread legs. He moves to take his briefs off, you’re practically drooling as he pulls them off. His cock springs up and slaps against his stomach, “Fuck.” You whisper, a thought that wasn’t meant to come out.

Danny moves closer to you, his fingers coming to your core, you almost jump from the enhanced sensation from between your legs. His fingers dip inside you a moment, you sigh out, your breath making Danny’s curls sway against his face from your proximity. “Show me what a good girl you are.” He whispers before pulling his fingers away and bringing them up to your lips. “Taste how sweet you are.” His voice sends chills across your body. Your eyes don’t leave his as you present your open mouth to him, sucking on his slender fingers. You hum against them, tasting your own arousal from his fingers. You open your mouth again, allowing him to pull away, but he doesn’t.

His fingers rest on your tongue, “Such a good girl.” Danny whispers, he experimentally pushes his fingers back in your mouth, further back. You don’t dare break eye contact as he slowly runs his fingers in and out of your mouth. “Pretty little slut.” He smirks as you gag around his fingers, your eyes water, but you don’t retreat. “Suck.” He commands. You do as you're told and suck on his middle and index fingers, he sighs at the feeling. You release them with a ‘pop’, Danny smiles as he watches your face when he brings his fingers back down to your pussy, teasing your clit before pressing back inside of you.

You can’t help the moan that rolls out of your throat at the feeling of him filling you up. “Mmm, you are so tight.” Danny rasps, he moves closer to you, prompting you to lay back, his fingers slowly pushing in and out of you. He envelops you into a kiss as he makes work of you. You moan against his lips, grinding down on his fingers, your eyes fluttering closed at the feeling of him grazing your g-spot. “I know baby, I know.” He teases you as he continues finger fucking you, his pace speeding up a tad. His hardened cock lays against your thigh, you whimper as his fingers move faster. “You need it so bad, huh, baby?” Danny’s voice sends a chill over you, “Mhm.” You can’t even speak it feels so good, playing your body like he’s done it so many times before, so intune with you for absolutely no reason, it makes your head spin.

“I wanna hear you say it.” He says, your eyes look at him, almost shyly. “Yeah, I wanna hear you say it. Hear that innocent little voice of yours ask for what you want me to do to you.” He smiles devilishly, the sound of your wetness all over his fingers fills the room, making you want him even more. You move to speak, but his fingers curl up inside of you making you moan, “Oh fuck,” You whisper to yourself, trying to get yourself under control. “I-I want you.” You say, Danny just chuckles, “Oh sweet girl, you’re gonna have to ask a lot prettier than that.” He teases, he adds his thumb to the mix, rolling over your clit as he finger fucks you.

“Mmm, fuck. I-I want you to fuck me.”

“Not even a please?”

“P-Please, Danny. Please, I wanna feel it. N-Need to feel it, fuck me.”

Danny thinks for a minute to himself, a smug smirk on his face, “Yeah, that’ll do.” He grins before kissing you, his fingers pulling away as he puts himself between your open legs. You hum against his kiss as you feel his hardened cock resting against your warm core, begging for more. You buck your hips against him, hoping and praying he'd understand how much you need it. He smiles against your lips, "Oh yeah? That bad, huh?" He teases. You open your mouth to protest but whimper as he slowly taps the head of his cock against your needy clit. You look at him with eyes of dismay, shocked how your body reacts with a jump with every touch like this. "Like that, baby?" Danny speaks in a way that makes you practically buzz with excitement. "So much." You whisper.

Slowly he presses inside of you, both of you moaning at the stretch. It feels like a wave flowing through you, from your scalp down to your toes. All you need in this moment is him. "Fuuuck." Danny's voice waivers as his eyes close, "So fucking wet for me." "Fuck baby, just for you." Your voice breathy and small sounding as you rake your nails down his back, making Danny sigh in your ear. His hand comes down to your thigh, pulling it over his hip, gripping so tight you pray it leaves bruises, wanting some sort of proof that this pleasure wasn't some fleeting dream.

The angle is so deep and you can't help the way he's making you sound. Your nails gripping into his back and pulling him closer to you. It's all so fuckin perfect, you've never felt this good, so all consumed by desire and a euphoric pleasure that takes you under like the wave of tsunami. His breath cascades over your cheek and you can't help the way you wish you were the only oxygen in his lungs. "Fuck, Danny." You moan out as he speeds up his pace, the head of his cock grazing against your g-spot in a way that has your legs spread even wider for him. "So good angel, so fuckin good." He practically growls as he moves faster.

A moan rips through you and you're clawing at the sheets beneath you, your hands detach from the linen and take root in Danny's curly hair. He groans at the pull, the way your nails scrape through his scalp. You're so close to the edge, the way he's pounding inside of you and the way the bedframe slams against the wall of your bedroom makes your eyes roll back in ecstasy.

Your eyes slam open as the presence of a large hand presses against your throat just right. "Look at me baby. Want you to look at me when I make you cum." Danny's voice is so raspy and commanding you can't help but say, "Yes, sir." It must have sparked something in Danny because the way his eyes glint in the golden light of your bedroom leads you to believe you must have stumbled upon something. His pace quickens and his hand on your throat closes tighter, your eyes roll back and a devilish smile pulls at your lips as you completely surrender yourself to Danny.

The building pressure inside of you has you moaning against Danny's strong hand surrounding your throat, making only a weak and broken whimper come awkwardly tumbling from your mouth. Danny releases his grip on your throat and instead holds your wrists down to the bed as he fucks you. "Let me hear it baby. Come on, angel. Be a good girl and cum for me." He whispers, his own voice shakes as he's barely holding on to his own climax. Your moans are so loud and Danny's name falls so easily from your lips, crying out for more and for him. He watches intently in your eyes, feeling the way your pussy flutters around him, and the way you can barely keep yourself from moaning as you cum hard around him.

Your climax makes Danny practically collapse against you, letting go of your wrists and opting instead to hold you close to him, both of his arms encircling your waist, hands grasping to your back. His nose presses against your neck as he groans, your name like silk on his lips as his hips stutter and slam back inside of you, cumming so deep.

The two of you lay this way for a moment, both panting and searching for something to say, but you're both practically fucked so stupid you can't form any notable shit to say. Your pussy flutters around him, both of you moan exhausted at the intense shock waves that course through you and to him. Slowly and gently Danny pulls out of you, you whine at the loss of him and the way you can feel his cum leaking out of you so deliciously. "Uh where's your bathroom?" He blushes as if he weren't just choking you and fucking you senseless. "Uh, yeah, uh right down there." You chuckle as you point to the door that leads to your en suite bathroom. He returns with a clean washcloth and helps clean you up, a thing your ex never once cared to do for you. Your heart swells at his tenderness with you. He returns to your bed, motioning you to come closer.

You waste no time as you rest your head on his chest, looking at the tattoos that intricately swirl in dark ink over his body. His warm hands hold you close, your leg over his, soft fingertips run over his ribs. "That was…" You trail off, blushing as the words evade you. "Yeah, that was everything." Danny smiles, hands gently caressing your back.

"I've never felt that good before." You confess. "Never?" Danny asks surprised, you shake your head. "I could've guessed, you really weren't lying." Danny smirks. "Can we, um, do this whole thing again sometime?" You ask looking nervously up at his big brown eyes. His eyes light up innocently, "I don't think I could make this a one time thing if I tried." He smiles, his arms subtly hold you tighter.

"Wanna stay the night?"

"Baby, I'll never leave if you keep holding me this way."

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jarofstyles · 1 year

Text

Reaper 7

Reaper is a dark story with dark and mature subject matter. 18+ NSFW

This chapter contains some intense emotional whiplash. You learn a bit more about their backstories and trauma, but first... filthy smut :)

Check out our Patreon for exclusive writing and early access!

wc: 10.6k

warnings: smut, crying kink?, daddy kink, talks of death, talks of human trafficking

----------------------------------------------------

Harry wasn’t necessarily in a rush to get home, but he definitely appreciated the lack of traffic on the road. He obviously preferred to ride his bike but on days like these where there were barely any cars on the road, he liked to drive.

Bunny was sitting pretty next to him, trying her best to stay still while his hand massaged the inside of her thigh. It was warm and heavy, she really liked it. Of course, any other time they were in the car, he’d done the same thing. Now, they were just both on edge.

The black set would definitely make Harry lose himself in the moment and that’s something Bunny was desperate to experience. His passion, his desire for her. Even seeing it in his eyes got her excited.

Harry was extremely hot while he drove, though. The one hand on the wheel, his jaw clenching as he chewed his gum, he is fingers tapping the leather as the radio played a rock song on low.

He was sex on wheels, really. Her body was thrumming from the near foreplay they’d had shopping and his mixture of touches while they drove. It was hard to behave knowing damn well what he was going to do to her the moment they were behind closed doors.

“I can feel you thinking.” He murmured, squeezing a bit further up her thighs. “What’s running through that pretty little head, darling?”

“That this feels really good and that I have to wait.” She tried her best to get the sentence out without giving away how bothered she was. Unfortunately, her staggered breathing gave her away. “Just want to be home already,” Bunny bit her lip before continuing. “I really want your mouth. I can’t stop thinking about it.” Flashbacks from the night before filled her mind, his hold on her so tight that she felt she’d never get away. It was exactly how she liked it.

“And the way you kept looking at me in the dressing room…” Y/N wouldn’t forget to mention it. She noticed and she wanted him to know this as well, she could read him now. A lot better than before. “Could see you holding back, but your eyes were ripping everything off of me.”

“My mouth?” He laughed, taking a second to peek at her. She was obviously very affected by it and he couldn’t blame her. He had thought of her mouth since she had it wrapped around him the first time.

“I was thinking about it, yeah.” If the stalker wasn’t an issue… “once this shit is settled, I’ll happily make you cum wherever the fuck you want. I’ll take you to places where people can watch us. I don’t care.“ he was an attention whore when it came to sex and no stranger to exhibitionism.

“I had to get you out of the store before I did that. But you behaved incredibly well.” He had genuinely been surprised at how good she had been. His fingers traveled up more, though, because he simply wanted to. She had been good and the privacy in their care was enough to make him feel slightly more comfortable, up the further it could go on her thigh as he continued the massage.

“I’m proud of you, baby. I like when you listen to me. Makes me happy. Especially because it means I get to reward you instead of punishing you. I think you like it either way, though.”’

She liked being good. It was difficult at times to keep it together, but she knew it was better to wait and get what she wanted. Especially when she was still learning his sweetness.

There would come a time when she wouldn’t be so patient, where his need for dominance wouldn’t stop her from pushing for what she wanted. Today wasn’t one of those days, today she wanted to let him take her the way he’d been thinking about in that dressing room.

“I like making you happy, I hope you like making me happy too.” She said with a small smile, turning her head to look at him before leaning in for a kiss on the cheek. “Who would have thought Mr. Reaper was a softy deep down hmm?”

“Mm… no one.” He smirked. They were too busy being terrified that he was going to be one they saw before they met their maker. She was the only one who saw him in this sort of way.

That made her smug. A little arrogant. No one else got to see him like this. But a question caught her curious mind before she could help it, really. Maybe she didn’t want to know the answers but she wanted to ask.

“So… no other girls get to have you like me?” She peeped, picking at her cuticles, avoiding his eyes. “You don’t like…” her pause was anxious. “You don’t take them shopping and call them cute names?”

He didn’t mean to, but he laughed. A real laugh that had his head bobbing, his head shaking no as he squeezed her leg nice and firm. The question was hilarious, all things considered.

“Absolutely the fuck not, babe.” He chuckled. “I… I fuck them and get the fuck out of there quicker than they can redress. I know it makes me sound like an ass- but they knew the score. No promises. I’m not a good guy, Bunny. But I’m trying to be the best I can for you.”

She knew better than to ask why, but her eyes lingered on his profile and admired the way his jaw clenched slightly probably expecting her to say something.

“How is it going so far? Do you like it?” She asked softly, her attempt at calming her mind while his hands proceeded to bring warmth between her thighs. Y/N remembered him saying he never had any girls over at his, this further confirmed her suspicions. She really was the only one he’d been treating this way.

What did that say about her? She didn’t want to get too excited, but to think she could be special to him really did boost her confidence.

“Cause I really like it… it suits you, ya know?”

His fingers drummed on her thigh as she spoke, feeling a bit reassured as she spoke about liking his soft side. It wasn’t something he was sure she would.

His appeal was the bad boy, let me take you for a spin, biker fantasy. He attracted people who wanted to be fucked hard, given when their partners couldn’t give them. They didn’t see him as capable of the softer shit- and thank god for that. He usually wasn’t.

With Y/N? With his Bunny? He couldn’t imagine not taking care of her afterward. Not taking time to hold her and brush the hair from her face, kiss her. It was rare he did that with anyone else, too.

She was just a juxtaposition of things he usually avoided, yet utterly craved with her.

“Does it? Y’like me being sweet on you?” He murmured. “I do. Wouldn’t have it on anyone else though.” They’d get the wrong idea. With Bunny, he didn’t mind if she thought he wanted to keep her around. He did more than ever.

She felt rather proud of herself for it, that she of all people was the one to crack the terrifying Reaper. It was easy, she’d just watched him from the sidelines with her brother. Sterling always had a good judge of character.

“Like when you’re rough with me too.” Bunny felt like she had to say it, she was used to being babies all the time. His rough touch was a good reminder that she could take more despite what others thought of her. She liked the rush she felt and how confident he was that he wouldn’t hurt her.

“You said you didn’t like punishing me earlier… is that true?” Y/N expected Harry to have some sadistic tendencies considering all the people he killed. His need for justice. Surely the thought of her whimpering in a bit of pain or fright excited him. He wouldn’t take it too far with her, right?

“Well… no. I do like punishing you. But I like doing it by giving you pleasure.” He admitted. Of course, he had some mean tendencies. “Love calling you names and making you beg. But I want you to beg me to stop because it feels good.” He let his pinky finger brush the outside of her cunt, feeling her stiffen a bit but continuing on as if he didn’t do anything.

“I’m… very much looking forward to being rougher and exploring what you like. What your limits are. I don’t think I have any.” Not with her, anyways. “I like to baby you… like to take care of you after. But I liked when I had you suck me off and took it away. I like making you earn it. Because we have to be honest…” He smirked while keeping his eyes on the road. “You’re a greedy little thing for me. A slut. I like hearing you beg. Would love to see your pretty eyes cry for me because you want it so badly. But I’ll give it to you.”

“We have plenty of time to do that.” She told him, knowing that it would all unravel with time. The two of them could barely keep their hands off each other, she expected to find out lots about their relationship in the time to come.

“Think you can show me a lot of things I’d like… you definitely have more experience than I do with these things.” Y/N’s responses to him were all natural, she didn’t really have a plan whenever she decided to seduce him. It was much more exciting not knowing what he would do next. Thrilling even.

“Please tell me we are almost home.” Bunny couldn’t wait any longer, every stroke of his fingers had her clenching to relieve some of the pain. Yes, pain. She wanted it so bad it almost hurt.

“Gonna put on that black set and you can do whatever you want.”

—-

Harry was sitting patiently on his bed.

They’d gotten home unscathed because he had physically wrenched his hand away when she started shifting her hips towards his hand, knowing if he didn’t stop he would take her in the car.

As soon as he buried the son of a bitch, he would be taking her places to fuck her specifically. Harry was a big fan of, exhibitionism, even if he was selfish with Y/N. People could look. But he would be damned if they touched.

“Bunny, baby.” He called out. “You’re stalling.” She had been in the bathroom for a bit and he knew that she was aware that she was in for it as soon as she came out. “Want t’see the pretty thing you’ve bought for me to rip off. Come show me how pretty you look.” He was taunting her, and himself. He was hard and wanting, now that they were home safe.

Bunny didn’t mean to stall, but she did want to take a moment to collect himself. She did look amazing. It’s something she definitely would have picked for herself, but would be too nervous to wear for anyone.

It could be a bit much, but that seemed to be just his style. The straps dug into her skin in all the right places, she looked absolutely amazing. This time she had sorted out the clips and even added some knee high tights to complete the look.

“Hold on, you have to wait.” Bunny fixed her hair one last time before taking a step out. She stood there for a moment so he could get a good look at her, doing a little spin for him.

“M’not a patient man.” He murmured to her, eyes taking in her body as she finally exposed herself to him.

The outdid was incredible, really. Lacy babydoll type of thing, black contrasting against her skin. Her hair was in curls down her shoulders, swaying as she moved. The panties underneath clipped to the knee highs making him clench his jaw.

Such a shame all of it was going to be ruined.

“God, you’re fucking beautiful.” He said quietly. She was too pretty and it made him feel unworthy of her. Even if the darker clothing and the hint of desperation in her eyes made it easier to indulge, the feeling still lingered.

Right now, though, he was pushing it away for his own selfish gain. He wanted her and he wanted her fully.

“Come stand in front of me then.” He rested his hands on his knees, eyes dark as they took in her approaching form. He could feel her eagerness, her want just as much as he could feel his own.

“See… if you keep going with this well behaved streak, you are going to be a very spoiled girl.” He tapped his fingers against his jeans, head tilted up as she stood with her hands behind her back waiting for instruction.

“How needy are you, angel? Are you still gagging for it? Or do you think you can wait?”

She let out a whimper at the idea of waiting any longer. She was here anyways, what could a few more moments really change? If anything, it would only result in more praise. Hesitantly, she decided to agree to his terms.

“I think I can wait a little bit.” It was her attempt at trying to be honest, he didn’t have to ask to know she was needy. She really wanted him. Badly. Last night and this morning hadn’t been enough, she swore it could only get better and better from here on out.

“Can I have a kiss please?” Bunny felt like this would become a habit. Her asking for kisses before they participate in the most sexually explicit acts. Harry was good at speaking filth. It was something that was both expected and unexpected from him. The words he picked for her she couldn’t imagine him speaking to anyone else. She didn’t want to. In her eyes, she was the only one.

He melted a little at the request for a kiss. Like he would ever want to deny her a kiss and himself of a taste. But- she knew to ask. She knew that he liked when she had that obedience and he could only be grateful that she was a good girl like this.

“Course you can. C’mere.” standing up, he wrapped his fingers around her jaw and tilted her up so he could cover his lips with her own. Gentle and delicate and sweet, he kissed her lightly and let her melt into his body, hands clutching the bottom of his shirt.

“That’s a good girl.” He murmured against her mouth, pulling back to look down at her damp lips and wide eyes. “Love this mouth. Tastes so good, love the sounds that come out of it… but I especially love the way it feels on me.” He kept his grip with one hand, the other tracing over the lace on her sides.

“You look so pretty. So sexy. Got this innocent little face, but then you get to your body… and fuck, it makes me want to ruin you. Already have some of my marks on this smooth skin, you’re something that I’ve been craving for a long time. Just sinking into your cunt this morning wasn’t enough.” He could never have enough.

“So I want you to get on your knees for me and play with Daddy’s prick. Want to feel you kiss it and suck, because I know you want it in your mouth. Almost did it in the dressing room, didn’t you?”

She felt herself clench around nothing at his words, put under a spell after the sweet kiss he’d laid on her. Bunny wouldn’t have it any other way, if he wanted her now he’d have her. Anyway he liked.

“Yeah…” A shy breath was all she could manage, her cheeks feeling at the thought. “Wanted to make you feel good.” She felt so much power when she’d sucked him off in the kitchen. Seeing him surrender to the pleasure made her feel on top of the world.

“Work so hard to keep me safe, wanna make it worth your while…” Of course, she would have done it anyway, but surely he would be happy to hear that. Slowly she made her decent, but not before pressing kisses down his clothed chest and stomach on her way down.

“I love your cock so much,” She wasn’t lying, she really hadn’t been so obsessed with someone’s dick before. The way it felt inside her, the sheer size, the way it looked… she couldn’t have picked a better option. “Wanna feel it all the time.”

“I know you do, darling. I can see it in your eyes.” That wasn’t an exaggeration either. The night before, the night she had sucked him off, even today in the dressing rooms she had looked incredibly hungry for him. He didn’t want that to stop.

“I’ll keep you safe in any way but… you’re right. Like this incentive.” He gathered her hair back, wrapping it around his fist lightly. He had the control of her head but he liked to let her think she was going to have it for a bit.

“Go ahead and get it out.” He was a tiny bit impatient today because he had been essentially edged the entire time, especially in the fucking lingerie store. Just seeing her now all dressed up in a pretty thing he had bought for her was enough to make him want to do incredibly disgusting things to her.

“Remember what you did last time, hm? Gave it some kisses? Why don’t you do that? Thank me for making you cum last night.” He was being nice right now, but that could very soon change.

Unbuckling the belt and unzipping his jeans with speed, she did her best not to rush with pulling him out as well. Slow and steady, not to seem too eager. It came naturally to her to press kisses against him, smiling at how hard he was.

“How long have you been hard for, daddy?” The name rolled off her tongue, the eyes she was giving him were mischievous. She wouldn’t dare test him now. “Can I…” She toyed with the waistband, pressing kisses against his length closer to where it was peeking out of his boxers. Yes. He was that hard.

“I like dressing up for you, want you to pick things out for me more often.” Maybe that was a kink of hers she had only discovered because of him. She had a feeling that would be happening more often than not.

“Been hard since the first dressing room when I saw you undressing me with your eyes.” He rarely held things back in this regard. Sexually, he was able to be open and honest, and raw. Outside of that, his vulnerabilities got in the way and he clammed up. But with her mouth on his cock, she could coax most answers from jinx

“And then it was bad when we got to your store and I couldn’t just bend you over and fuck you in there. I will, one day. I’ll make you limp leaving those changing rooms, my cum inside of you.” That was an appeal too. The more primal part of owning her. “But we had to wait until now. I still get to see you dressed up… but now I’m going to be able to hear you moan for me.” He stroked the top of her head as he urged her down towards his balls. They were full and heavy, sensitive, and needed a little bit of her attention.

“Give them a kiss, angel.”

She followed his direction, pressing kisses and kitten licks to his swollen balls. He gasped at first, the groan that followed was music to her ears. Her face was growing warm, a smile appearing on her face at his pleasure.

“More?” Bunny asked, allowing her lips to take a bit more into her mouth with a gentle suck. Her tongue glided across the thin, sensitive skin with care. She knew he could take a lot more, that he would take more. All she had to do was be patient and listen to him. That shouldn’t be too hard, right?

Y/N pulled away from him with a pop, pausing for a breath. She could feel her heart rate picking up. The rush of endorphins already made her feel high. Remembering what he liked most, it was easy to repeat the actions while her hands worked on massaging his thighs.

“See? What a fucking natural. You know how to pleasure me.” He was impressed. Very impressed, really, because Y/N was truly weak for him. She wanted to pleasure him just as badly as he wanted to pleasure her. “And you’re filthy. Wish I could take a picture of you down there. You’re making a bit of a mess but you’ll do anything to make me feel good, yeah?”

“Yeah.” She bleated, looking up at him with wet lips before licking up the length of his cock. “I love it. Like being dirty for you.” Without being prompted she took the head of his cock into her mouth, moaning as the taste hit her tongue. This was exactly the type of thing she had needed after the day long edging, lips wrapped around the tip and sucking softly to help herself.

“Just for me.” He warned. “My good little girl. Only letting yourself see how deprived you actually are with me.”

As if she would ever think to leave. She’d been waiting for so long to finally have him, there was no way she’d give him up so easily. Not when he proved to be everything she wanted and more. They hadn’t even properly gotten into things yet.

The weight of his cock on her tongue was enough to pull her eyes to close. Slowly she took more and more of him into her mouth, it felt divinely guided, she was following her desire and it was leading her down a messy and dirty path. She pulled back slightly only to spit over him, spreading it along his shaft with her tongue flat.

She wished in that moment that he could take a photo. It was far too risky, but hopefully, this nightmare would be over soon. They could get back to doing what they did best. Hopefully, this wasn’t just a temporary thing, that he was being honest when he said he wanted this for just as long as she had.

“God- fuck. That’s the shit I like. Spitting on it like that…” He hissed, admiring the mess the was making on his length. Harry was a sucker for messy sex, especially messy blowies- but having Y/N be the one to do it was another level.

She listened clearly to his likes, sitting up again to spit thickly on him a second time, and used her hand to help spread it while she sucked him back into her mouth. The groan of arousal that fell from his lips was her reward, a beautiful one at that.

“Got lucky with you, didn’t I? You’re locked up with me but now I can show you exactly how it is to have good sex. It isn’t hard to teach when I’ve got such an eager little slut on my hands.” He praised mix with the degradation, the pair making her moan against his cock. This was what she liked. His dirty mouth doing both at the same time. “You can take more. You were gagging for it earlier- go ahead. Stuff me down that throat.”

She was holding back, it was true. Bunny wanted more, needed more, but was just waiting for the green light. The slight push forward he gave her was enough to have her take him as far as she could.

Her eyes blinked open, looking up at him with teary eyes as she continued to suck and drool all over him. He loved it. He couldn’t take his eyes off of hers, watching her as she fully relaxed in his grip. His perfect bunny, he groaned at the thought.

“Fuck… might have to keep you forever, hmm?” Harry let out a grunt, “Can’t let you out of my sight. Think they even have a chance with you… I’m going to ruin you.” He meant it in the best way. Harry wanted to ruin her for everyone, she’d never be satisfied.

Just when he felt himself at the back of her throat he pushed himself a little deeper, tugging at the roots of her hair securely.

“Remember you’re mine.”

She gasped around his cock as he pulled it back out, the wet strings of spit connecting her lips to his length as her hand continued to stroke it. He was pleased with her, but the words he said set a little fire in her stomach.

“Mhm. Yours. Should keep me.” She rasped, eyes wide and hot as she took the tip back into her mouth and lowered her head back down. He fucked into her mouth a bit, grunting as he felt her drool dripping down his balls. Just how he liked them.

“That’s right. M’glad you know that you’re mine. This perfect fucking throat is mine too. Such a good little cockslut.” He crooned, pulling her off and up to her feet. His lips pressed against hers even with his taste and her messy face.

“I don’t even know which position to fuck you in. You look so good…”

It was then as he trailed off that Harry had an idea.

“Baby… You still with me?” He hummed, pressing kisses to her face. “You look so pretty, would be a waste if you didn’t see it for yourself… wouldn’t it?” It was then that his hand cradled her jaw and guided her view towards the standing mirror at the foot of his bed.

“Can you turn around for me, my bunny?” He felt a smirk grow on his face. Harry was ready to tease her a bit more, some more tender love and care to the body he loved oh so much. In case she wasn’t aware, he wanted her to see all that he adored.

“Been so good for me, waiting so patiently…” His hands smoothed over her hips, pressing a kiss to the back of her head.

Y/N let out a shaky breath as he stood behind her, his hands stroking over her body as she looked at the pair of them. It brought her back to the dressing room, seeing how good they looked together in that mirror. How they fit.

This time it was more erotic, the droop of her eyes and her slightly wet chin, the need obvious in her face and his cock against the lace of her body suit. His fingers dragged down, her head lulling back onto his shoulder as his hand cupped her cunt.

A breathless moan left her lips as he held her there, humming deep in his chest as his chin rested against the side of her head. “Don’t close your eyes. Look at you. Look at us.” He coaxed.

She obeyed, looking with hooded eyes as his own pierced hers through the mirror. “You look so fucking good, my Bunny. Especially when you dress up for me… my hand holding your cunt. You gave it to me, didn’t you? Handed it right over. And now it’s mind. You’re soaking, ruining the bottom of this pretty set… but you got so needy while sucking me.” His voice broke the quiet of the room, watching her chest heaving slightly as he spoke. “I think we need to reward you. What do you want?”

Anything.

God she would take anything at this moment just to feel some kind of relief. She wanted his mouth, but she was too impatient. She wanted his fingers, but she knew it wouldn’t be enough. Bunny wanted to feel full.

“I want your cock inside me… please Daddy.”

Harry nearly choked at the softness of her tone, how she went weak to his touch. He swore in that moment he couldn’t let anyone else see her this way. Her vulnerability was something he cherished and vowed to protect, despite the disrespectful thoughts running through his mind.

“I know you do,“ His voice was calm and collected in contrast to what was going on inside of him. “Don’t even want to undress you, look so pretty little dolly.” Harry cooed as he touched and pushed her panties to the side. Wetness coated his fingers instantly and he couldn’t hold back the animalistic groan that left him.

“Bunny,“ He had to take a deep breath to collect himself before he pinned her down to the floor and forgot the whole point of the mirror.

She inhaled sharply as she felt his finger press inside of her, arching slightly to press herself closer to his hand. It was incredible, his touch working its deprived magic over her as she let him do as he pleased.

“More.” She breathed, turning her head and tucking her face under his chin. “More, give me some more. You’ve been teasing and I just want- I need you inside of me so bad, I’m begging.” She had been edged all day long with their foreplay, her body thrumming with need.

“Shhh.” He quieted her down. “I was just getting a feel of your cunt, baby. Trying to see if my cum was still in there.” He never went raw with anyone else, would reject that in a heartbeat. But the only place he wanted to unload was buried deep inside of her. It was a primal thing, probably, but he got a sick satisfaction watching it drip out of her earlier.

“Are y’gonna let me inside of you without a condom, baby? Because I want to fill you up again. I think that’s where my cum belongs.. inside this tight little hole.” He was giving her a chance to tell him no, but prayed she would let it happen again.

In all fairness, she wasn’t in the mindset to say no. She wouldn’t have denied him anyway. It was Harry. It seemed that was the response to everything these days. There was no one she trusted more than him besides her brother. This wasn’t circumstantial.

Even without his protection, she would still want him to fill her with his cum.

“Please… just wanna cum, just wanna cum for you all over, want to get it all wet, want to feel you in my belly— I want you, please don’t make me wait anymore!” She was on the verge of tears, his short strokes over her clit doing little to nothing to dull the ache.

“I’ll do anything you want! Please! Please, please, please, ple—AH” She gasped as he pulled his fingers from her, placing one loud slap over her thigh. Enough to get her attention but not to hurt her.

“That’s pathetic, my angel. So fucking pathetic. Almost in tears because you want my cock that fucking bad?” He grinned and looked into the mirror, using his other hand to fore her face to look at her.

“Look at you, pet. My pretty little whore. Begging for cock, this perfect wet cunt begging just as much as your mouth. M’gonna give it to you, but I want you to watch. Do you understand?”

His fingers pulled from her cunt and she nearly sobbed at the loss, but her protest was muffled as his fingers were stuffed into her mouth. She began to suck instinctually, tasting her arousal all over the digits.

“Clean up your mess. Not the first one you’re going to be cleaning tonight. Brace your hands on the mirror.” He instructed, watching as she did as asked. “Arch your back and stick that pretty ass out for me. There’s my girl.” His murmur was soft, his hands stroking over the skin before he praised her again. “Keep your eyes on us. Don’t look away or I’ll stop.”

His cock was swiped over her weeping cunt, the tip sensitive as he held back a hiss at how good the wet heat felt even just brushed. “Tell me to fuck you, and you can have it.”

“Please fuck me, fuck me, please-” Bunny begged, letting out a shaky breath at her own impatience. Her desperation was obvious, panting a bit now that his fingers were free from her mouth. Harry had never seen something so sincere. A tear fell down her cheek, her hips slightly moving back against him while her hands gripped the mirror.

“Please.” It came out as a breath, making eye contact with him in the mirror. Y/N had reached a breaking point, but she’d never felt so good.

Harry couldn’t hold back a smile at the sight of the tear. She submitted to him fully once again and he was in awe of how perfect she truly was. So willing to give in to him just as willing as he was to please her. How could he ever deny her after this?

“Shhh… baby, relax. Just a second.” Harry cooed, watching the tension leave her body at the news. In one swift motion, he pushed inside of her, doing his best to stay quiet so he could hear her clearly.

“Oh- fuck.” She whimpered, her mouth falling open as he pushed into her. There was still a bit of sensitivity from being fucked last night and this morning, but it almost made it better. The tiny bite of pain as he stretched her open made her breathing quicken. “God, you’re so fucking big.”

It was a stroke to his ego. Looking at her face as she took him paired with the words that fell from her pretty mouth, he hummed as his hands squeezed her hips. “And you’re going to take every single inch. Because you were made to take it.” He kissed her shoulder lightly, eyes on hers as he sunk in a bit deeper before finally filling her to the hilt.

“Are you thinking about how it would have been if I’d given in to you earlier? If I just sunk myself into this pussy in that dressing room? Because I thought about it all fucking day.” He rasped, grinding against her a bit as he felt her clench and adjust to his size. “I was so tempted to do it, even though your naughty mouth doesn’t know how to shut the fuck up. There’s no way you could keep quiet when my cock is inside of you.” His lips brushed her shoulder again as he kissed the other one, a smirk rising on the corner of his lips. “But you love the idea of being caught. Of being heard. I can tell.”

It was hard for her to keep her eyes on them. The intimacy of looking deep into her own eyes, being face to face with her own pleasure was overwhelming. The visual of him looking over her, the way she could see his muscles flexing with every thrust. She already felt her knees threatening to buckle.

“Mmm— I wanted you to keep me quiet.” Something about his hand holding her mouth shut while he fucked her against the wall. Similar to what they were doing right now, actually. “Feels so good, want it harder. I can take it, promise.” It was addicting, the way he pushed into her with such vigor, feeling desired.

“Want you to cum inside again,” Bunny couldn’t hold back her whining, “I want to do this every day, want— wanna feel your cum drip out of me, wannAH!” Harry always liked to surprise her with a hard thrust mid sentence. It was a way to get her attention, a way for him to assert his power.

“Want so many things, my spoiled little dolly…” Harry mumbled, thrusting relentlessly. “So impatient once you get a taste— did you not wait enough today?” He let out a harsh breath through his nose.

“I waited, I was so good, please.” She whispered, blinking away the needy tears in her eyes. If she started crying she likely wouldn’t stop. Her hands gripped the mirror as she looked at them both, his hands gripping her hips so tightly it paled the skin. Her body was hot under his touch, eyes shutting momentarily as he tugged her back harder on his cock with a grunt.

His cock was hard and thick and stretched her so perfectly, barely giving her a second to adjust. Instead, she had lost her breath, feeling his balls thwack against her clit. Being fucked standing up like this was taking her air.

“Fuck…” The whine was desperate, Harry watching her face as her eyes rolled back. She looked incredible like this. Her face slack with pleasure, body tense as he fucked into her with powerful motions. She was dripping down him, making his body even slicker to give it to her.

“Let me see those eyes.” He growled, releasing one of her hips to grab her throat. His hand collared her neck firmly, not squeezing but letting her be aware he was fully in control. That itself had her cunt gushing, eyes snapping open to meet his. “Look at me while I own you. This body is mine. D’you understand me?” His lips brushed her ear. “Who’s pussy is this?”

“Yours.” She whimpered out, eyes locked on his through the mirror. In her peripheral she could still see him sliding inside of her, her tits nearly bursting out of the outfit she had on at the intensity of his thrusts.

“It’s yours. It’s always been yours. ” Bunny was struggling to keep her eyes open, whimpers leaving her mouth. They’d had sex in the shower before and it felt similar to this, but the mirror definitely added a whole new element to it.

“Wanna dress up for you more, wanna do all kinds of things with you, just your little cockslut!” She felt more tears threatening to spill, his hand had moved to rub over her clit and the pleasure overwhelmed her. “Oh my— ah! Fuck! Harry, please please please!”

“That’s my good little whore. Keep begging me.” He grunted, feeling her body growing weaker in his grasp. Her poor legs were shaking as she took a pounding and he knew that she wouldn’t be able to last much longer standing up.

He decided to pull out. Y/N cried out at the loss, babbling about putting it back but Harry was quick to turn her around and bend her over the edge of the bed.

“My needy slut. Your legs were about to give out. Needed you on a surface you could finally give in and hand yourself to me.” His hand came down on her ass roughly, her body jolting at the hit.

“Put it back, give it back, I need it. I need it. Please.” She whined, pressing her ass back as Harry teased her clit with the tip. He gave in to her wishes, the wet flesh parting to take him back into her needy cunt with a cry of relief.

“Yes, yes- thank you, Daddy. Thank you.” She wailed, gripping the blanket as he gave it to her deep. So deep and full, her stomach clenched each time.

Harry couldn’t control himself, it was taking everything in him not to rip the remaining fabric on her body. His hands had left a perfect hue of red over the swell of her ass, smoothing over the skin only to place another sharp spank.

“God, you get better every time? How do you do it angel, hm?” Harry could feel himself coming closer to the edge, his face feeling warm now that the room was filled with heat from their filthy acts. “Go on, tell me your secret?” He purred, leaning down to whisper in her ear.

Bunny shuddered at the sensitivity his whisper triggered, the grazing of his teeth against her earlobe only adding to the mess she was making. Every part of her felt like it was on fire, vibrating with every new touch.

“Was made for you- I was…” she gasped, feeling each and every inch as she filled him. It would be embarrassing how wet she was if he obviously didn’t love it. “It’s your pussy, Harry. It belongs to you. I don’t want a-anyone else inside me.”

The declaration of his ownership went straight to his blood. That’s the type of shit he wanted to hear, especially balls deep inside of her weeping cunt. It was wet and hot and clenching around him harder than it had this morning, seemingly enjoying the deep fuck he was giving. He was a mess- his thighs and balls wet with her slick arousal, her body generously coating him in the proof of her need for him.

“I’m so glad… you and your body know that. It’ll never get better. No one will ever fuck you better than me. This has always been my cunt. Filthy fucking whore.. rubbing yourself in your bed thinking about me while m’at your house with your brother… wanting me to sneak into your room. Yeah, your body’s always belonged to me.”

“Harry— I’m so close, please! Don’t stop, right there, just like that!” Her knuckles turned white from the grip on the bedsheets. The imagery of him fucking her forever was honestly all it took. She’d never felt more satisfied than with him, the way he worshiped her body and mind felt far better than anything she could have imagined.

Never would she have guessed it could be like this. The sound of slapping skin kept Harry’s rhythm for him, his hot breath fanning over her skin.

“So fucking wet for me, listen to you.” He growled, staying quiet for a moment to focus on the sound of her squelching pussy. Harry sponged kisses over her shoulders, nipping the skin here and there to leave small marks. He loved the way she looked adorned in them.

“Make your mess baby, go on… wanna see how hard you can cum for me. Let go.”

Y/N was a wreck. Her body shuddered as his kisses lingered on her shoulder, the heavy sounds of their breathing mixed in with the sounds of pleasure filling up the bedroom. His cock was hitting just right, just at the spot he was claiming as his own and it made her body feel flooded with euphoria. Every bit of him against her was making her crazy.

She tried to reply but she couldn’t. Instead, her body trembled under him as the orgasm overtook her. A broken scream left her swollen lips, a gush of arousal soaking Harry’s cock as he pressed himself down onto her body.

“Fucccck. Perfect fucking pussy.” He grunted, his deep thrusts overtaken by her orgasm. He was so close, so close to the edge and her cunt was trying to milk it from him the best it could.

“M’gonna give you all my cum.” He growled against her ear, the hot words making her shudder as she felt them. “Gonna fill this hole up, mark it as mine. Soon M’gonna fill every one of your holes with my load. Mmm..” he groaned into her neck, keeping her pinned under him. “Ask me nicely for it.”

“Please, daddy… want you to fill me. I want to feel full of you, want it to drip down out of me…” Still breathing heavily, Bunny let out a hum at the feeling of his needy thrusts. She could tell he was getting closer.

“Please! Let me have it, I love how deep I can feel you— why don’t you cum for me?” Y/N squeezed around him just right, purring at the sounds of his strangled groans. Harry wasn’t afraid to moan in her ear, sending goosebumps over her skin.

He fucked her so raw and real, she’d never known sex to be this good before. He loved her body, he never let her forget it. It seemed he also loved her soul, the way he seemed to understand just what to do and how to move.

This was what sex with feelings was like? He understood the hype now. Why people said ‘just wait.’

Sex had always been a mechanical function, something fun, a stress reliever- but god damn, this was something otherworldly. Going bare inside of her, tending to her pleasure, letting her satisfaction become a part of his?

Fuck, he was obsessed.

It didn’t take much but a few more strokes for him to unload deep inside of her, groaning into her neck as his thrusts got sloppy, trying his best to fuck his cum as deep as he could. It was all pure instinct at this point. No guidance from experience would explain his primal need for her and his need to mark her inside and out.

Bunny whimpered at the feeling of him unloading into her, his whole body seemed to soften and his demeanor dropped for a few moments. He was just Harry, fully relaxed and open to the love Bunny was offering. He couldn’t resist her, nuzzling against her neck and pressing kisses and bites to her skin.

“You’re so perfect, bunny…” He mumbled, releasing the small nip of skin he had pulled between his teeth. “Such a perfect girl, I’m never going to let anything bad happen to you.” He whispered, staying deep inside her as he spoke.

With his chest rising and falling, he shifted off from on top of her while placing kisses all down her back. As much as he’d like to stay like that with her forever, the two of them could use some cleaning up.

His heart was still beating hard in his chest, reverberating into his ears as he winced at the cool air on his cock. His eyes though were focused on her cunt. His hands spread her open again, watching the trickle of pearly white cum dribbling down her cunt.

That alone was a sight he wanted to commit to memory. It would be enough to get him to a second round if he allowed himself, but instead, he chose to swipe the mess with his fingers and push it back into her sensitive hole.

Bunny whimpered at the feeling of two of his fingers sliding back into her used cunt, but she didn’t pull away. She let him, the pure filth of the idea of him making sure his load stayed inside of her making her clench a little.

“Shh. Don’t get all worked up again. Just putting my cum where it belongs.” He kissed the small of her back, pulling his fingers out and raising back up to her.

Ever so gently, he curled his hand around her face and slipped the digits into her lips, a surprised noise masked by instinctual sucking. The pure ease of his dirty action, how natural it felt and the taste of them mixed with his fingers made her sigh. He made sure she cleaned them well before pulling them out with a ‘pop’, turning her face to the side, and kissing her deeply. The man needed to taste him on her tongue.

“Thank you, baby.” He pulled back, exhaling against her lips. “Think we need to clean you up, yeah?”

———————————

This was new for both of them.

Y/N hadn’t taken a bath in ages let alone with a guy. Harry? Hell, he’d never thought he’d be sat in his bath gently washing a girl off with an exfoliating cloth. He pressed a few kisses to her shoulders, letting her relax into his hold while she sat between his legs. They hadn’t said much to each other since getting into the bath, but it didn’t feel like they needed to.

“Harry…” Bunny’s voice broke him away from his train of thought. “I had a lot of fun with you today,” She was shy telling him this but she was positive no one had ever gotten the chance to tell him something so pure. Sure their day was full of teasing, sexual tension, and sex, but she had felt at ease in a way she hadn’t felt since this all started.

“Was nice to just forget about everything going on and just feel normal…” She explained, turning her head to face him. “Thank you.”

“Y’don’t have to thank me.” He replied, looking into her soft eyes. The warm water of their bath had soothed them. They’d showered briefly to get the sweat and cum off of them before letting the bath fill, Harry was finally able to use the bath salts he had purchased a while ago when he’d suffered a bit of a beating during a fight again. They smelled like lavender and smoothed up their skin quite nicely.

“I had a good time too. I’m going to make sure that soon you can go out and do shit whenever you want without looking over your shoulder.” He kissed her cheek, his tone meaning it was final. There was no way he would rest until this bastard was dead.

“M’sorry that you even have to go through this shit. That... men are creeps. Don’t understand why or how they come up with shit like this. I can’t say I don’t understand your appeal, you’re fucking great.” He murmured, gaining a soft smile from the girl in his arms. “But that doesn’t mean you go out and stalk a girl for it. It just… it makes me sick knowing you’ve felt this way for a while and someone’s been preying on you.” He wished she had told him sooner. Of course, he understood to a degree why she didn’t- but he didn’t fully get it. That was a conversation for another day.

“What was your favorite part?”

There had been a few rare occasions where she was able to speak with him like this, where she felt like she was getting the real side of him reserved for people like Sterling and now her. Harry had a good moral compass, respected innocent people, and cherished their humanity.

“My favorite part?” Bunny smiled back up at him and turned to press a few kisses on his arm. “I liked seeing you try the shirts on… it sounds silly but just seeing you check yourself out in the mirror and hyping yourself up. It was nice.” She really did find it wholesome, the idea of big bad reaper being just a normal guy who still wanted to know if a shirt looked good on him.

“But I think this is my favorite part though,” Bunny admitted, keeping her eyes on him despite how small she felt at that moment. It was sweet. He never let her shy away from it, even let himself dive into it at times. She’d never felt so close to someone.

“Yeah?” He smiled, moving the washcloth chastely with the soapy mix over her chest. It wasn’t sexual in the slightest, even though Harry could go again if she asked. He didn’t think he could ever get enough of her and her body. Her pleasure. It was a new addiction for him.

“I liked it all, I think. Especially seeing you try those things on. Gave me a bit of blue balls but you rectified that situation very well.” He teased with a chuckle, dipping the cloth into the water to rinse the soap off of her.

“You know I’m going to take care of you, right? I’m going to make sure you’re safe no matter what. I know you may not love my decisions sometimes but I hope you can see why I make them.”

He still felt a bit insecure because he knew he was a bad man. He wasn’t good enough for a woman like Y/N. He could never be normal, not when the deepest and darkest parts of him yearned to make people pay for their sins and take them to the afterlife. She hadn’t fully seen him in it, which is surely why she looked at him with rose colored glasses.

As fucked up as it is, he was going to take advantage and soak in that as long as he could. Make sure he got a taste of her affection and what it would be like to be hers… before the inevitable crash happened once she saw what type of monster he really was.

Seeing him smile was all the humanity she needed from him. Reaper rarely smiled, she’d like to think she was the only one who’d ever seen this one. It made her heart swell, to think that she could make him happy. Genuinely happy. To her it didn’t matter who he was or what he did, she knew that behind all of this was a broken young boy who just wanted to be loved.

“I know… you’ve always been there.” Bunny thought back to the time just last year. The reason her brother had left, well, part of the reason. “When dad died and Sterling took off… I didn’t know if Mama and I would make it.”

Bunny had known from a young age her father was always getting into trouble. The bruises on his knuckles, the scars that accumulated over time. He’d always told her it was nothing to worry about, till one day he didn’t come home.

“I just… wish I knew more? Know you were all just trying to protect me, but even Mama couldn’t tell me what happened.”

Harry stiffened slightly at the mention of this topic.

Fuck.

He pulled her closer to him, kissing her jaw as he exhaled tiredly. Did she really want to know? “Because the truth is something we want to protect you from. Not to say you can’t handle it… but because sometimes it feels like a gift to be ignorant of the dangers and tragedies.” He mumbled, the discomfort welling in his throat.

“If you truly want to know? I’ll tell you. You do deserve the truth but… we all agreed maybe you’d be better off just remembering your father as how he was. He was one of the strongest men I’ve ever had the privilege of knowing.” He swallowed around the lump in his throat, trying to keep himself from being upset. It was one of the worst days when he died. It fucked Harry up for a while, as well as most of the guys around when it happened.

None of the guys in the club would be considered model members of society. They were seen as criminals, scary men to stay away from. But there was a real brotherhood to it.

“Been to the clubhouse, know from his jacket he was one of you.” Y/N started, after all, it was her who wore her dad’s old cut now adorned with a Bunny patch. Bikes were always a part of her life, when she was little she thought it was just a hobby. Until Sterling also came home with bruises and scars. Even black eyes. It wasn’t so fun then.

“Sterling was there wasn’t he?” Her voice was quiet, “When it happened…” There was no way for her to know that other than her sisterly intuition. It all made sense to her though, why else would he take off without explanation?

It took her a long time to forgive her brother for leaving, it was Harry who always reminded her not to be so hard on him, giving her updates on what he was doing.

She fully relaxed into his hold, pulling his arms closer to her chest. Bunny just wanted to feel his weight on her, it soothed her.

“He was.” He hated thinking about that day. Harry tried his best to repress any emotions he could simply because it was easier than dealing with them. He took release in sex and fighting and the occasional binge of drugs, as cliche as all of that shit was. He knew it wasn’t what was supposed to be done but he’d never had a person he wanted to talk to.

A confidant.

“It was a deal gone wrong. I can’t tell you everything the club does. I’ll let you know that… we help people run things like guns and drugs. Your father didn’t care about that but the one thing he didn’t like was the dealing of people.” Harry despised it.

It was the most despicable thing someone could do. In his opinion, anyways.

“I can’t get into the finer details but a person we were helping a deal with… we found out the containers had people in them. Trafficking people. Your father and Viper stopped as soon as they heard the woman’s voice at a rest and opened up the container… along with the drugs, there were a few women. They weren’t of sound mind but one was lucid enough to tell us she had been taken, and that was enough for us to back out. We took the girls and put them in the cars we had tailing, took them out of there.” One of those girls still was around, working to try and clean the clubhouse. They did their best to help but not much could help the trauma she went through. “We then broke into the rest of the containers and found a few more women and we realized how many we needed to get out of there… so we did. We called and said there was an issue with border patrol and called out more people to get these women, these girls out.” Their cries and blank faces haunted him. To know in the past there may have been a woman he didn’t hear and dozens of them could have been smuggled under their noses…

“When the group we were trying to help found out what we did… a massive fight broke out.” He didn’t want to continue, but he would if she wanted more detail about her father.

“I don’t know how much you want to know… but I hope you know your father fought extremely hard. It was a dirty move and…” He swallowed, squeezing her body as he hid his face in her hair. “He died protecting women that were being taken advantage of. He died a hero to those women. I tried to save him. I uh…” He rolled his head back from her hair and rested it on the back of the tub. “It’s why my back is fucked up. They fight dirty with their weapons. The cut and the bullet wound. S’from me trying to cover his body.”

The room was still, heaviness settling around them just as the steam hugged their bodies. The sound of their breathing in sync, the stray droplets of water that bounced off the surface. Y/N let out a long shaky exhale.

It was a lot to think about. With so many thoughts clicking in her mind, Harry swore he heard the cogs turning in her head. Each thought felt like a spike, the way Bunny became aware she had no control over any of this suffering. Ignorance is bliss, but to her, the awareness was accommodating.

She moved so she was straddling his lap, sitting on the span of his thighs so she could look at him. She couldn’t have this conversation with her back faced to him. Her hand moved delicately, cupping his cheek in a hold that was so tender she felt tears prick at her eyes.

The one thing she could do, in a way words would never be able to describe, is kiss him.

It was the softest kiss she’d ever had, it was sinless. Her heart broke for them all. For the women, for her family, for him. Tears spilled from her eyes, but she didn’t bother holding them back this time. She could never express how grateful she was. How lucky she was to have him in her life, how honored she felt to know him so intimately. She pulled away after a beat, taking a second to ground herself in the moment.

Bunny loved this man.

“Thank you for telling me,” Her voice was the gentlest it’s ever been. “It’s not easy reliving those moments in your mind, I’m sorry you had to witness it.” Y/N brushed her thumb over the span of his lips and cheek. A few more tears did fall, but she’d found peace in knowing the truth.

He smiled sadly against her thumb, the little knot in his throat preventing him from speaking. Harry wasn’t a crying type of man, but he did feel emotional thinking about it. It was one of the very worst days of his life.

“I’d do it over and over if I had to. It was the right thing. I don’t regret it but… sometimes I wish that we could go back and be a bit smarter with how we planned it out.” He sighed, letting his eyes gaze into hers. She was perfect, his Bunny. She really fucking was.

“Listen…” He wanted to make sure he got something clear to her. “I know I’ve done good things. But I need you to be aware, to be reminded… m’not a good man. Maybe I can be good to you… I’d never hurt you, I’d rather die. But I’m not good. I’m rotten and dark and I have a lot of problems. I know you’ve got a good view of me now and I don’t want to ruin it, but one day you’re going to be scared of me.” He swallowed, feeling guilt from his core.

“None of us are. As I said… we are all troubled and have a skewed moral compass. We don’t hurt women, children, or animals… innocents. But I’ve got issues, Y/N. I can see you care for me, maybe even as much as I care for you. I just need you to know that before….” He swallowed again, eyes searching hers. “Before we let ourselves slip into the comfortable dynamic we’ve had the last few days. Protect yourself.”

He’d never hurt her, not on purpose, but he knew his issues lay deep.

“I tried to protect your father… I protected your brother and now I’ll protect you. I won’t let anything happen to you as long as m’breathing. I’m sorry we had to hold this from you.”

Her hand moved down to his neck, gently pushing his hair behind his shoulders. She was taking a good look at him. This monster she had been describing, she’d seen him before. The warehouse. She heard enough.

“You can hide all these parts of you from people, but you cannot hide them from me.” Bunny was certain, she knew him far too well. Her fingers toyed with the chain that hung loosely from his neck, eyes flickering back up to his.

“I know you’re capable of many horrific things, Harry, but that does not define who you are.” Y/N refused to believe that he was rotten to his core. He would never have the capacity to care for her as he did without a seed of hope in his heart. Did he really believe to be undeserving of it?

“I promise you. I know what I’m doing… I just need you to let me in.”

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trashytoastboi · 7 days

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Day of Greed - Mammon

~SFW Alphabet~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

💰 Constant touch, Mammon is clingy in the sense that he physically needs to be touching you, hugging you, holding you, just anything. He adores head pats, it's the physical act of praise for him and he laps it up. Mammon is the avatar of Greed, it's obvious that it extends even to the intangible like your time and attention. He is possessive, he will have a hand on your waist, your thigh, an arm slung around your shoulder in public most of all. In private he's more fixated on other stuff, like having you patting his head, playing with his hair, giving him lots of kisses and calling him a good boy. Does worry that his Greed will engulf you or scare you away, but at the same time he feels like a slave to it. Mammon always hopes that you know that he would never swallow you whole, he won't let his sin devour you and he never asks for comfort from these rampant thoughts, but it's obvious when he needs peace of mind.

B = Best Friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

💰 The bad influence, in the sense that things are never, ever dull with Mammon around and most of his schemes get the two of you in trouble all the time. It seemed like a good idea at the time but most of his ideas always do. Maybe it's natural charisma that convinces you time and time again. Most of the times when you hang out together you go window shopping, bargain hunting and always helping Mammon with plotting his latest scheme or brand new business idea which is usually a scam with mass profit. It’s entertaining, Mammon usually acts like he doesn’t care but he is always courteous and kind and even generous towards you.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle)

💰 Mammon adores cuddles, he wholeheartedly just wants to be close to you. Originally he used to crave the closeness for his method of pickpocketing though his intention has changed towards you. You remember how he’d touch your ears all flirtatiously and his expertly deft fingers would take any earrings, necklaces, any jewelry of any kind without you being any the wiser. You’re thankful that Mammon is different now, he genuinely just wants affection and wants to cuddle you for the sake of having you in his arms. Somehow it just eases his possessiveness and lets him know that you’re his and he is yours.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

💰 3/10, has no time for either. Will do it to make you happy. He can cook if he has to, I mean how hard is it? Cleans but hell he could be doing something else instead of that. Although Mammon grumbles and groans about it a lot he will do it if it makes you happy. He wants to settle down, as soon as possible. I mean what greater way to show everyone that you’re his than putting a ring on your finger. He loves seeing his pact mark on your body but it pisses him off to see his brothers pact marks, but a ring- would be his and his alone. His brothers couldn’t give you a ring.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

💰 He’d suddenly start acting like he’s wrapping things up. Paying back any outstanding IoU’s, giving back anything he ‘borrowed’. The entire thing would just look awkward and suspicious. What's the sudden rush and change of heart? When it comes to the actual break up part, once everything settled he just… does it. He’ll rip the plaster off and boy does he dwell on his decision. Will constantly write texts and never send them. Will be lost and not present mentally, he’s angry and upset about it. He thinks at least, maybe it’s his sin gnawing at him for letting his greatest treasure get away.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quickly would they want to get married.)

💰 Would be the fastest and most obvious way to stake his claim, everything from your name and even vows- which in their own way are a pact. He’d have two pacts with you and you’d be his in the greatest sense of the word. Maybe it’s the title, he tries to reign in his possessive nature but it’s hard when it literally is his nature. To be greedy, and possessive of you. But the title you carry of being Mammon’s spouse, the sound rings sweeter than the wedding bells themselves. It would ease his worries while boosting it all the more. He’d adore you, as he always has but even more so when you’re his greatest treasure, his person.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they? Both physically and emotionally.)

💰 Bit of a sharp tongue when he tries to cover his own embarrassment and can get angry at times over certain things, but he has never once been physically harmful to you and if you really think about it, he’s always soft towards you. Even if he’s angry he’s never raised his voice at you in anger. In concern and worry yes- yelling at you when you make harmful decisions but never in anger, You know he’s gentle, he always has been. Even if he uses sharp words you know the true meaning behind them is not like that.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

💰 He does like hugs, they keep you close…Close to him. He wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you close, his cologne is always distinct and with hugs sometimes the smell rubs off on your clothing. It’s such a subtle thing, maybe even Mammon doesn’t realize it. He’s always affectionate, always holding a hand, has a hand on your thigh and hugging you. He just needs to be touching you always. Genuinely will sulk if he can’t.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-Word)

💰 Mammon says it through actions and gift giving. He’ll spoil you with gifts, he doesn’t realize why you’re special. Why he desires to give you everything he has, when he comes to the realization of love- it’s something he begins to say on the daily. He’ll tell you, always. How much he loves you. It works its way so naturally into his dialogue because it genuinely just feels so right- nothing feels better.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they're jealous?)

💰 Oh he is a jealous boy- He just doesn’t like you going out to hang with his brothers when you could be with him instead. He’s more of a sulking jealous kind, he won’t get angry but he’ll sulk and might give you silent treatment until you pamper him with attention to make up for depriving him earlier. He’ll make it known that he’s grumpy and will give you that ‘subtle’ sigh and just sigh louder until you notice him and ask what’s wrong and he’ll give you his sob story about you ignoring him.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

💰 Intense, engulfing. Every kiss is so overwhelming filled with all his passion. He feels a little playful and has a tendency to bite. He likes holding you, a hand behind your head as if to prevent you from running around and another around your waist. He likes giving you kisses on your forehead, lips, and cheeks. He has a habit of leaving visible marks on your neck that makes it a little embarrassing when you don’t know it’s there. Likes to be kissed anywhere - so long as it’s you doing it.

L = Little Ones (How are they around children?)

💰 Doesn’t mind them, but wouldn’t voluntarily be around them if he can avoid it. They’re a bit much for him to handle besides! As one of the oldest siblings, he’s had his fair share of dealing with children. It’s a little bit of a problem considering your soft and fluffy aura and kids always attach themselves to you if they get lost or something. Mammon obviously tries to help out and has become very adept at dealing with kids

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

💰 He spoils you, wakes you up gently and is usually extra affectionate in the mornings. He likes getting ready together, sometimes he even helps out with your hair and stuff. Making you as blinged out as you possibly can be even with the uniform. You eat breakfast together and then head off to RAD. It’s the real royal treatment because Mammon enjoys spending time with you and prefers it if you slept over in his room the night before. His day is absolutely made when he gets to wake up next to your sleeping face.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

💰 Mammon likes going out - he’d try to convince you of his little idea and take you out. Modeling has given him a lot of connections and he enjoys buying you clothes to let you get all donned and dressed up for a night out, he takes you to the high end places of Devildom to show you something different. Mammon is great because he takes you to so many different places. Of course he can get carried away and Lucifer is usually pissed when you breach curfew but it was totally worth it.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while and reveal things slowly?)

💰 Mammon was pretty open about himself, at least about how great he is at the very least. He told you a lot about himself, you almost could have mistook him for Asmo had you not met him prior. He talks about his great qualities, things that he possesses and how smart he is. Understandable. You always want the one you love to see the best side of you. Once the relationship got deeper Mammon was more honest with the things he would tell you. It wasn’t only the face value but he exposed his innermost thoughts and fears. It took trust and a bit of opening up for him to do so.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

💰 Mammon is pretty patient when it comes to you. Though only you can really testify to that since Mammon has always been that way with you, you’ve rarely seen him get very angry even when you’ve heard quite a few stories about it. You didn’t believe it at first then regarded it as a hidden side to Mammon. You’ve asked him about it but Mammon being Mammon of course denied that it ever happened. His best strategy, admit nothing - deny everything. He’d get mad at you in the sense of his concern overflowing if you’ve done something reckless and you can’t take him seriously when he’s practically pampering you to make sure you’re fine.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing or they kind of or forget everything?)

💰 Usually plays it off that he coincidentally remembered you wanted this or liked that, nevermind him actually knowing and actively looking for it so he could give it to you. He likes playing it cool, and if you catch him out on it he’ll usually give some half cooked theory as to how he magically remembered it. Mammon honestly listens, loves learning about you and remembers every little detail. Maybe it’s another manifestation of his greed, to possess all the possible knowledge of you that he possibly can.

R = Remember (What is their favourite moment in your relationship?)

💰 The moment you called yourself his. The affirmation of your relationship- he knew that everyone was attached to you and everyone loves you, but he was the first. Mammon is more aware of his flaws than he lets off, most would never guess. Considering how everyone calls him shameless. He didn’t know in the end, you hold pacts with all his brothers. You all had a deep connection to prove that he was closer to you than anyone, that more than anyone you cared about him more. Mammon toiled with those silent insecurities, until one day you just seemed to affirm it was him. That out of his brothers, it was him that you chose.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

💰 He’s always been your protector even when he regarded you as an annoying and random human that didn’t belong in the Devildom. He was your first and most steadfast protector, even now. Although the depth of his reasoning has changed Mammon is very protective of you, no matter what or who. He doesn’t even think twice before acting. Mammon never wanted anything in return, so long as you were safe and out of harm's way that was more than enough for him. Although you protected him on various instances and in other cases even went as far as shielding him and putting yourself in harm's way. He would get upset, what if something happened and he lost you?

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

💰 He tries hard, his utmost for you. Never anything less, you’re his special person and you deserve only the best of the best. Mammon has always told you that and never failed to remind you of that fact. He may be overbearing with the gifts but he truly means well even when you tell him that you don't need the same pair of shoes in every single colour they had to offer, he’s faithful to the anniversary game, 1 week, 30 days, 100 days, 6 months, 1 year - he remembers them all and has mentally planned all the perfect dates he could take you on for them. In everyday life he has a habit of doing small tasks, or leaving you small gifts. A random juice or snack on your desk at RAD, seeing that your portion of chores had been done for the day. Mammon was usually embarrassed to admit it’s him so it's from the quote, “secret admirer”.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

💰 His possessiveness. He knows it’s part of his nature and a big part of his sin, but he fears some of the thoughts he has. He is scared of those thoughts and buries them beneath everything else. He wonders how he could completely possess you, and in a dream, more aptly described as a nightmare he thought about devouring you completely, making sure your soul would know no one else but him. How he got irked seeing his brothers’ pact marks on your body, or those stupid sorcerers protective sigils that he left on you as well. It irks him, he’d never say anything knowing it’s for your protection but his thoughts wander to dangerous territory and it frightens him that one day he might act on it and scare you away.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

💰 He’s a model by trade, he’s gotta be concerned with his looks and make sure he’s picturesque. He’s not vain to the point of being obsessed but he enjoys looking and feeling good. He especially likes donning himself in the biggest brand names that Devildom has to offer. He also likes looking good for you, on the days when he has a shoot and is dressed up in a different style to the one you’re used to and he catches all of your little stares and glances, he loves it.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

💰 He would feel very incomplete without you and feel like something is constantly missing. It was an emptiness he never knew existed until he met you, you filled that empty space that tugged in subconscious and when you’re not around he is painfully aware of it. It contributes to his reasoning of wanting to be around you and with you, he feels at peace and whole. Mammon just gets all listless when you’re not near him and he’ll worry about you a lot.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them)

💰 For someone so greedy he loves spending his money, specifically on you. You lose track of the amount of gifts he buys, how many strings he pulls to get the latest designer wear all for you, even securing limited editions. You told Mammon on multiple occasion that you didn’t really need the gifts nor had the space for them but he can’t help it. He’ll buy something and say it made him think of you :( More than anything he wants praise from you.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn't like, either in general or in a partner?)

💰 No sense of humor, he likes to tell jokes even if they’re not all that funny. He occasionally drops a really hilarious one. But he’s not a fan of overly serious people with no sense of humor, maybe because it reminds him too much of Lucifer, who in his eyes, is a stick in the mud. It just kills the entire vibe if he’s cracking jokes and there’s someone who feels the need to splice the entire joke and just takes all the fun out of it.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habit of theirs?)

💰 Would you believe that he had stuffed animals that he actually stuffed with grimm? He loves snuggling them, he also has a lot of pillows that make it difficult to sleep next to him unless you toss most of them off and away from the bed, Mammon is a chronic snuggler, any which way he rolls he wants to grab onto something and snuggle, that just so happens to be you as of late.

Taglist: @completelyshatteredbrokenmschf

#trashytoastboi #obey me #seven days of sin event #mammon #obey me mammon #om! mammon #mammon x reader #female reader #male reader #gender neutral reader #obey me!#obey me nightbringer #nightbringer #avatar of greed #greed #sfw #fluff #fluff alphabet #obey me imagines

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lambtotheslaughterr · 1 month

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I Burn : Part Seven

A Rafe Cameron Mini Series

[THIS STORY WILL CONTAIN THEMES OF NON-CON/DUB-CON, MENTAL-EMOTIONAL-PHYSICAL ABUSE, ETC. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK. 18+. MINORS DO NOT INTERACT]

WC: 3.7k

Dividers provided by @firefly-graphics

PART SIX | MASTERLIST | PART EIGHT

note* reminder to new people on the taglist, to remain on a taglist, you have to interact with the work you want to be tagged in. that can be either commenting, reblogging, dropping an ask, or dming me to discuss your thoughts. taglist is a privelege, if you don't follow my rule about interacting you will be removed. this is my only warning. thank you!<3

Today was a day of celebration. Siena had completed her 12 week program & she would be leaving tomorrow. As always is the case when a patient successfully completes their program, there is a going away party. You were mildly looking forward to it, an excuse to not think about all the shit going wrong in your life, but you weren’t looking forward to having to socialize amongst those who were not happy with you. Albert, namely.

You got dressed a couple hours before the party. It had been a couple days since you practically busted his door down in search of comfort. And comfort he did give.

He consoled you, talked with you through your fears & guilt, reassured you that the lawsuit was nothing you could have predicted therefore out of your control. It was not your fault John was choosing to sue your father. Dr. Mooney, like your mother, agreed that the likelihood of John winning was slim. He had eased your consciousness.

After you went to bed that night, you realized that what Rafe had told you at the beach was bullshit. Of course, your mind was preoccupied with the news your mother brought you, but at some point in the midst of your talk with Dr. Mooney, you began to pay attention to him closer. There was no indication that he was attracted to you, nor possessive of you like Rafe suggested. There was genuine care behind his eyes, he kept an appropriate distance from you, & his words never lingered to anything that would clue you in to any sort of desire. Dr. Mooney was there to help you. Whatever Rafe interpreted that as was just that, an interpretation.

And now, more than ever, Dr. Mooney was your only friend in the facility. After your blow up in group, there was no one other than him who smiled when you appeared or entertained small talk with you. Part of you still felt like shit about what you had said to Albert, but you couldn’t sit on it forever. You said what you said. There was nothing to do about it except apologize & hope for the best.

It’s why you went to the party early. The lawn behind the building had been turned into a festivity. There were few tables with tablecloths, tables along the windows that peered into the group session room that held the food & drinks, none of which were alcoholic of course. And there were congratulation balloons billowing in the light breeze. You hoped to get to the party earlier in the hopes of talking to Albert. But after twenty minutes, you were still the only one there.

Heading back inside, you intended to go looking for him, but as you were about to round a corner to head back to the youth wing, you walked abruptly into another.

There was no hiding the sound of annoyance you made when your eyes met Rafe’s.

“What’s your problem?” He questioned, matching your hostile energy.

“Looking at it.” You glowered, attempting to bypass him, but Rafe was quick to snatch your elbow in his hand. You ripped your arm from his grip, rounding on him quickly, “Stay the fuck away from me.”

Rafe’s eyes darkened at that. Before you could resist further, Rafe suddenly dragged you into the closest room, which also happened to be the group session room. You weren’t too worried about being trapped with him. After all, it was the middle of the day & everyone would be walking by the door any moment. You’d make this quick.

“What the fuck.” You groaned, glaring at him as he tried to shut the door behind the both of you. But you threw your hand out to stop him, keeping the door open for anyone walking by to see in.

“You’re avoiding me.” He stated.

You blinked, cocking your head sassily, “Great observation. Now leave me alone.”

“What’s your problem?”

“You.” You seethed, stepping forward. “I’m done letting you fuck with my head.”

“What are you talking about?”

“You know exactly what I’m talking about.” You poked his chest, “I may be fucked up in my own ways, but at least I don’t play with people’s heads & emotions, making them feel confused & scared.”

Rafe rolled his eyes at that, unimpressed with your stance, “Scared? Don’t be such a little bitch.”

Hot rage coursed your veins. You wasted no time in shoving him, “That’s what I mean!”

A look of surprise flashed across his face at your gentle assault, & you wished you could revel in it, but you had other priorities that needed your attention. “You claim you’re looking out for me by telling me some bullshit about Dr. Mooney wanting me & now you’re calling me a bitch because I’m calling you out. You’re fucking twisted, dude.”

A displeased smirk appeared on his face then, “Takes one to know one, right?”

“Oh, fuck off.” You spit, “From now on, don’t talk to me, don’t look at me. I don’t even want to fucking hear your voice.”

“Or what?” Rafe stood with his feet shoulder’s width apart, crossing his arms over his chest & tucking his hands under his armpits, “What are you gonna do, _____?”

You didn’t crack in your facial expression, but you did stumble internally. What could you do? Nothing, really. But you needed Rafe to know that he wouldn’t get his sick amusement out of you anymore.

Shaking your head, you made to leave, but Rafe slapped his hand on the door, slamming it shut, before shoving you against it & tightening his hold on one of your wrists to keep you from moving.

“Not a damn thing.” He stared down at you, his voice low. “You’re helpless. Weak.”

His words penetrated your skin, but you wouldn’t let them sink further.

“No.” You shook your head, “You are. And you don’t like that I see you for the monster you are.”

Rafe’s eyes flashed darkly then. It was your turn to smirk, “See? There you are.”

Before you could react, Rafe harshly gripped your chin, shoving your head against the wood of the door, right before he claimed your mouth with his.

You gasped into the aggressive kiss, your body regretfully lighting up at the action. You instinctively threw your hands up, placing them on his solid chest in an attempt to push him off, but Rafe wrapped his other arm around your waist, crushing his body against yours.

The burning between your thighs returned with a vengeance. As much as you hated this guy, couldn’t trust him as far as you could threw him, & knew that he only viewed you as a toy to pass the time, you couldn’t deny how well your bodies meshed together. Like they were each other’s missing puzzle piece.

Rafe growled into the kiss, the hand that was holding your chin, now kneading itself into the tresses of your hair at the nape of your neck. You sighed into his mouth, your fingers curling into the fabric of his shirt.

Fuck this man. You battled with yourself. You knew how you felt about him, there was no more confusion about that. But fuck if your body didn’t still want his.

He pulled away then, his eyes peering darkly into yours, “Your monster wants mine just as bad.”

Your chest heaved as you bit your lip, torn between glaring at him angrily or jumping his bones. Never in your life have you hated your body more than now. You knew well-enough & understood the urge & desperate desire to fuck someone, but wanting to rip them to shreds at the same time was a new mixture that had your head dizzy.

“When you’re done being scared, you know where to find me.” Rafe told you. Then he swiftly nicked his knuckle against your chin before exiting the room.

Finally alone, you let out a heavy breath. You stayed there a moment longer to shake away the lingering sensation of his hands on your body. You needed a clear head. Regardless if what he said had some minor truth to it, you were determined to avoid him until it was your going away party. Double checking your hair & clothes were in place, you finally left the room, dreading how the rest of the day may go.

Albert was inaccessible. About an hour into Siena’s party, & he had yet to stray away anywhere by himself. It was like he knew what you were wanting to do & was making it, so you’d have to apologize in front of everyone. But you had too much pride for that.

Rafe left you alone, too. Much to your surprise, he was sitting with Renee. You wondered what a conversation between the two of them would be like, but you wouldn’t be going over to find out. You kept to yourself the whole time, constantly watching & waiting for an opportunity to get Albert alone. You were sitting by yourself at a table in the shade when the sound of glass clinking drew everyone’s attention.

It was Dr. Mooney who stood near the tables of food & drinks.

“As everyone knows, today is a pretty special day.” He began as he found Siena amongst the people with his eyes. There was a good mix of patients & faculty, about 30 people or so.

“When Siena came to our facility, she had little hope about succeeding in her recovery. But all of us together with her have gotten her to a place where she feels confident & secure moving forward. And now, today, we celebrate her program coming to a close & going out into the world a new & healthier Siena Cortez.”

People clapped & smiled, a few cheers here & there. You watched as Siena looked uncomfortable with the attention, but Albert was there next to her to shake her, helping her not feel awkward.

“Siena,” Dr. Mooney smiled in her direction, “you have made myself, your family, your friends, & everyone here present very proud. You dedicated your time here to recovering &, dare I say, showed no struggle in the effort. You are a true example that one can get better as long as they believe in it.”

She pursed her lips to hide her smile, but Albert knocked his hip into hers, forcing her smile to crack open. You found yourself smiling along with her. More so, you couldn’t wait for the day when it would be you standing in her shoes.

“So, enjoy this party we put together for you. Say your goodbye’s, but know that when you leave here tomorrow, you have made a new family that believes in you every step of the way.”

“Thank you, guys.” Siena mumbled, but everyone clapped.

Dr. Mooney raised his glass of non-alcoholic champagne, “To Siena & her future.”

You morosely raised your glass alongside everyone else before emptying the contents into your mouth.

The music got turned up then & patients & faculty began to form a dance floor between the tables. Albert was in the midst of it all, dancing with Siena as she giggled happily to herself. You picked at your nails under the table, watching longingly as nearly everyone around you was enjoying themselves. If you hadn’t burned the bridges that others built to reach you, you’d be there in the middle with them.

Growing upset with yourself, you were about to stand up & excuse yourself to the closest bathroom, but before you could, Dr. Mooney appeared across the table from you. He placed his empty glass on the table, before leaning forward, “Don’t you want to dance? It’s not often you guys get to have fun like this.”

You shrugged, but tried to hide your discomfort with a smile, “I’m okay with just watching.”

Dr. Mooney’s smile saddened at that. You inhaled sharply as you watched him sit down across from you. You really didn’t want one of his positive lectures right now, not in front of everyone. Not like anyone would really be paying attention, but still.

“What’s going on, _____?”

“Nothing!” You cringed at how forced you sounded. You cleared your voice, trying again, “Really, nothing. I’m okay.”

He peered at you for a moment longer before glancing over his shoulder at the handful of people who were dancing. You followed his line of sight, your eyes falling onto Albert. As if he felt eyes watching him, Albert glancing your way as Siena spun him around. There was no hiding the hurtful look in his eyes before he focused his attention back to dancing with Siena.

“You two haven’t spoken yet, I gather?”

You sighed. There was no point in answering Dr. Mooney’s question. It was quite obvious.

“Would you like me to get him for you?”

Mortified at his suggestion, like he was a father trying to solve an issue between his kids, you jumped forward, “No, Dr. Mooney, please. It’s fine.”

He nodded, “You’re adults. You’ll find it in yourselves to figure it out, I trust.”

You certainly hoped so but knew you wouldn’t try very hard for very long.

“Dr. Mooney.” Nurse Carney appeared, “Your wife is on the phone. She said she’s been trying to ring you.”

“Oh.” Dr. Mooney patted himself down, frowning, “Must have left my phone in the office.”

Nurse Carney smiled kindly, “She’s on hold at the front desk.”

“Thank you, Kiera.” Dr. Mooney stood then, his eyes falling to you, “Try to have fun, okay?”

You nodded. Nurse Carney followed behind him as they disappeared inside. Relieved at being alone yet again, you watched for only a moment as people around you mingled about & enjoyed the beautiful day. After a couple minutes of aimless staring, you remembered you were going to go to the bathroom for a short while. Just to get away.

Throwing your paper plate of mostly untouched food into a nearby trash, you headed inside. The nearest bathroom would be on the other side of the main office. As you passed by the front desk, you noted that Dr. Mooney wasn’t there. Down the hallway behind the front desk, you noticed the door to his office was closed. You guessed he was taking the call from his wife there.

Inside the bathroom, you splashed your face with water & put your hair up. You stared at yourself for some time. Looking yourself up & down, but not in appraisal. You imagined your near future. Maybe you’d go to college, make something of yourself. You pictured meeting someone handsome & kind. Someone who wouldn’t judge your past. Most of all, you hoped that your dad would look at you with love again, or at least something close to it. Attending Siena’s going away party had forced you to think & feel about the future. Your future. How you truly wanted to be better. For everyone & yourself.

A knock on the door tore you away from your reverie. You sighed heavily before rolling your eyes. You also couldn’t wait to not live under the same roof as 20 other people.

Swinging open the door, you were about to step out to let whoever was waiting in when you paused. Renee leaned against the doorframe, her arms crossed with a knowing expression on her face.

“Hey, Nympho.”

You groaned, “What do you want?”

She smiled coyly, responding to you in a sing-song tone, “I know something you don’t know.”

You hardly interacted with Renee, but whenever you did, it was always filled with rigid tension.

“I don’t care.” You replied in a sarcastic sing-song tone of your own.

You passed by her, but she spoke up behind you, “I doubt that. But whatever. Your problem, not mine.”

You stopped in your walk, rolling your eyes. You knew she was likely baiting you, but her quick dismissal of it did peak your curiosity.

Turning around, you raised your eyebrows, “What? What is it?”

Renee sighed dreamily, “Well, what with all the excitement & soaring feelings of hope flying around because of Siena’s party & watching you daydream out there, I just thought you should know yours won’t be for a long while.”

Oh, so she was just being bitchy. You should’ve known. You were about to turn & walk away for a second time when Renne hollered out, “I can prove it to you.”

“I’m not falling for it.” You tossed over your shoulder.

“But Dr. Mooney is.”

What? Halting, you glared at the ground. You heard as her footfalls grew closer until she was standing right in front of you.

“What are you talking about?” You seethed.

Renee grinned, “I’m talking about how I overheard your favorite doctor on the phone with your daddy. I only got one end of it, but it sounds like your dad is willing to pay Dr. Mooney more money under the table to keep you here, at least until he wins the lawsuit.”

You wanted to call bullshit, & to claw her eyes out. But Renee was talking about things she would have no clue of. Grabbing her shoulders fiercely, you backed her into the nearest wall. You took brief pleasure in the shocked gasp that escaped her as her shoulders met the wall.

“Jesus, calm down.” She shoved your arms off, “I thought it’d be a dream come true for you to stay here with your doctor.”

“Shut up. Just tell me everything you know.”

She glared at you but continued nonetheless, “Just look at his notes, everything you’ll need to know will be there.”

His notes? “His notepad?”

“Uh, doy.” Renee rolled her eyes, “The one he carries everywhere for group session & one-on-one.”

“How do you fucking know that it’d be on there?” You were growing angrier. Though you couldn’t deny there was some merit to what she was saying, why the hell would Dr. Mooney keep any kind of info like that on his notepad?

“Dr. Mooney isn’t as smart as he thinks he is.” Renee claimed, “I read it every now & then. It’s how I know more about your issues than I should. About everyone’s.”

“You’re lying.” You pushed her again & her eyes widened in fury.

“Why would I fucking lie?” She argued.

Why would she really, you reasoned with yourself. You & Renee didn’t get along, but even this would be a new low for her. Besides, what would be in it for her anyways?

“Show me.” You gestured your head towards the back hallway. “Now, Renee.”

“Ugh, god, whatever.” With that, Renee pushed off from the wall & rounded the front desk, heading down the center hallway of the building where Dr Mooney’s office was. Following closely behind Renee, you could faintly make out the sounds of the party outside. Everyone would be distracted. You & Renee would have time to get in, see for yourself what she was claiming, & then get out. But part of you hoped she was wrong. She had to be.

Just a few feet away from Dr. Mooney’s office, Renee stopped in her track. She had her arms crossed over her chest, “Go ahead. I’ll be look out.”

You wanted to argue with her, but knew that you wouldn’t have the time do get in & out like you wanted. So, you bypassed her & went straight for the door.

Had you really taken a moment to think clearly about everything, you wouldn’t have found yourself turning the knob. If you had stopped to really question Renee & get details, you wouldn’t have opened the door. And if only you had just taken a moment to yourself before entering, really asking yourself if you needed answers in that exact second, you probably would have heard the commotion going on inside before you entered. But you weren’t the slow & patient kind of girl.

“Oh, my god…” You couldn’t hide the gasp that came out of your mouth when you barely took an inch into the room.

The two people before you yelped & scrambled to get dressed but it didn’t matter. You had seen everything you needed to see.

“_____, what the hell are you doing?” Dr. Mooney demanded, but the authority in his voice was nothing compared to that of him struggling to get his pants back over his legs. All the while Nurse Carney pulled a dress on over her head & raked her fingers through her hair.

You felt betrayed, violated. Not because you just walked in on Dr. Mooney fucking someone, but because you walked in on someone whom you trusted to be honest, good, & genuine. Yet there he was, fucking a woman who was not his wife. Fucking a woman who worked under him. Fucking in his office during a going away party for a patient of his.

A new burning sensation fulfilled you then. Not the kind you were used to. You didn’t feel like tearing your clothes off & slipping your fingers into yourself. You felt absolute & unbridled fury. This man—this pathetic liar of a man—was a wolf in sheep’s clothing. And he had fooled you most of all.

You registered the look of guilt on both their faces. Nurse Carney as she tried to hide behind her hair, & Dr. Mooney, who tried to hide behind his status. But you saw him for what he was. A false mentor.

Giving them both what you knew to be one of the gnarliest glares of judgement, you spun on your heel & stormed down the hallway. You didn’t miss the gleeful expression on Renee’s face as you bypassed her, & you couldn’t bother with it.

You had little hope coming to this facility, especially because you truly didn’t think you had a problem to begin with. But Dr. Mooney opened your eyes. He listened to you, he didn’t judge you, he swore he cared about you. He gave you the hope you didn’t know you needed. You wanted to make him proud, prove to him that you were worth the time & effort. That you were someone worth believing in. You wanted to be just like him. But he was the one who let you down. He failed you, not the other way around.

And he would regret it. That, you promised.

i don't know what ya'll are expecting but believe me when i say, you're not ready for what reader is about to do lmao.

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inbarfink · 9 months

Text

Flowey is meant, I think, to be a sort of a representation of the Player. He has just slightly less Determination than we do and he was filling up that exact same role before Frisk fell into the Underground. He was the one with the power of RESETs and SAVEs before we came along, so he was basically playing his own ‘prequel’ to Undertale over and over

First aiming at getting a 'good ending' -

But since he was unable to see anyone else in the Underground as a real person (what seems to be some sort of combination of the lack of a SOUL, being unable to process his Massive Amount of Trauma and the repeated time-loops allowing him to notice the repetitiveness and limitations of everyone’s reactions) he started moving into choosing crueler and cruller options.

Despite his affinity toward sadistic gloating, it is important to note that Flowey’s main motivation is actually boredom. Although he will only open up about it to Chara, the real reason why he’s out to harness the power of the Human SOULs and destroy everyone - essentially his equivalent to a Murder Route - is because destroying the world is the one last thing he hasn't done yet. The one option he hadn't seen yet.

Which mirrors the mindset of many who start on the Murder Route, as Sans himself points out.

Important to note here is that despite Flowey talking about how he ‘killed everyone’, he never actually completed his ‘Murder Runs’. Like both in the sense that he never got to destroy the Entire Universe like the Player does at the end of a Murder Route and Flowey tries to in the Neutral Ending, and in the sense that the reason why he couldn’t is because he never got his vines on the Human SOULs before the events of the game. So there must’ve always been someone that stopped him before he got there. The implication is that it was usually either Asgore -

Or Sans, as usual playing the role of a Murder Route final boss -

The fact he could never beat them might have something to do with his plant body being weaker than the Player’s Human body or whatever - but I think it is probably mainly a matter of Determination. Again, he is slightly less Determined than the Player is - so he would logically be slightly more prone to quitting. Flowey is basically equivalent to a Player who has done everything in Undertale but never actually completed the Murder Route cause he rage-quitted at the Sans Battle.

His relationship to Papyrus can also be a mirror to the Player’s. Since Papyrus is the one character who is always willing to befriend the Player no matter the circumstance. In the more dusty Neutral Runs he is characterized as being in the dark (or in denial) about how terrible his ‘friend’ actually is…

And that is basically also the relationship he has with Flowey in the current timeline. Papyrus is the only one who thinks of Flowey as a friend (and, well, the only one to know he EXISTS in this timeline), but he is totally in the dark (or perhaps willfully ignorant) to this ‘friend’ and his true nature.

Meanwhile, Flowey's behavior once he regains his Asriel form in the Pacifist Route mirrors the behavior of a Player who is replaying the Pacifist Route. He became so attached to the Player that he refuses to let the ‘game’ end.

Instead resorting to a plan to reset time and the Player’s memories over and over again, with the Player doing the exact same things again and again -

Just so Flowey won’t have to say goodbye.

That is basically the mindset behind replaying the Pacifist Route after already achieving everyone’s Happy Ending. Within the fiction of the game, you’re ripping them all away from their happy ending, resetting all of their progress - just because you have a hard time moving on from the game, just because you want another chance to play with them.

And the Route ends with the suggestion of a possibility that Flowey might be able to redeem himself and start caring about others again.

Just as a Player might be able to prove a genuine care to the characters on an in-universe level by being able to resist the temptations of the True Reset.

But they also might not…

Flowey is a third-person-POV demonstration to the Player of how a Player-like entity would be like in a video game world. An immortal time god who knows everything about everyone even while no one really knows them. Someone who has experienced every single reaction anyone could have to anything until they have become unable to see others as anything but predictable lines of code. Someone who prioritizes their own sentimentalities for others over these others’ actual desires. Someone who will destroy the entire world just because it’s something they haven’t done yet.

And I think Asriel, as part of this metaphor, is a demonstration of how this concept of the Player as an Amoral Time God within the fiction of the game does not necessarily translate into a condemnation of the actual real-world morals of the actual person playing the game.

Because Asriel and Flowey are the same person. The difference is that Flowey had Consequences-Free Time God Powers and an (supposed?) inability to care about others in the Underground as real people. In other words, Asriel is the self that interacts with the world as the real world - and Flowey is the self that interacts with the world as a Player in a Game. So while Flowey might be a mirror of the Player, Asriel might be closer to who we are in the real world.

And also…

I wonder if the scene where you have a chance to forgive or not forgive Asriel for what he has done as Flowey is also meant as a chance for the Player to self-reflect and forgive or not forgive themselves for the things they did before that True Pacifist Run. You know, whatever characters you might have accidentally or not-so-accidently killed in previous runs, whatever decisions you regret, whatever previous True Resets you might have done… If you believe Asriel can be forgiven (and most players do) for his actions - because he feels genuine remorse and he’s trying to do better now, then the Player can also forgive themself.

Well, outside of one little thing… There is one bad deed the game won’t ‘forgive’ you for. And it is the one thing that the Player can do and Flowey never could…

Finish a Murder Route.

#undertale #undertale meta #ut #undertale analysis #flowey #flowey the flower #flowey undertale #asriel undertale #asriel dreemurr #asriel

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mentally-in-northern-italy · 2 years

Text

the right time — j.f.

** not my gif **

Summary: Jeremiah's confession of his true feelings for you always seems to die on his tongue. Until one day, they finally find their way out - AKA the three times that Jeremiah tries to confess, and the one time he finally does.

Requested: request can be found here

Word Count: ~5K

A/N: jeeeez. i got carried away with this one. i had so so so much fun writing this so i hope you enjoy it!! so sorry again for the wait but hopefully this makes up for some(?) of it? i also changed up some aspects of it from the request, so i hope that's ok!!! anyways i have a few hp requests sitting in my inbox and i wanna publish them in the next week or so, so be on the lookout :)

—

Jeremiah had always been a bit of a fan of ripping off band-aids. He liked the finality of it, the speed of it, the elated feeling that always enveloped him after the fact. He liked getting it done in one go and never thinking about it again. Whenever he watched Steven slowly peel his band-aids off his skin, he would cringe all over, wanting to shout at him to just be done with it.

He berated himself now, as he sat on your bed, when he couldn’t seem to take his own advice. He could never listen to his better senses when it came to you. No matter how hard he tried.

And he tried really, really hard.

He knew that he should just tell you. The confession had been boiling on his tongue for years now – after all, he had figured out the magnitude of his feelings for you when you two were only twelve years old.

His feelings, evidently, did not like the confinement either as they only seemed to grow in size over the years. It was not a mere twelve-year-old crush anymore, and he knew that. Perhaps that was why his tongue always collapsed at the weight of it, why he couldn’t vocalize it.

It was a bit ironic, really, how flirty he could be with everyone else and barely mean the sweet words tumbling out of his mouth but when it was you, he couldn’t verbalize even the most sincere, genuine feelings. His flirtatious jokes always seemed to fly right past your head as you shook them off to just be “Jere being Jere”.

“Alright, red or blue?” You questioned, holding both of your tops up. You raised your eyebrows at the golden-haired boy sprawled on your bed, his arms supporting his weight as he leaned back.

“Hmm,” he pretended to be deep in thought with a half-smile on his face. “You’re going to look smokin’ hot in either, so…” He finished with a soft shrug of his shoulders, trying his best to maintain his easy-going facade, even in this situation.

Even when he is helping you pick out something to wear to a date with someone other than him.

“Jere,” you said with a straight face to drive home the seriousness of this situation. This was not the time for jokes.

“Seriously, though,” he sat up as he ran a hand through his hair with nonchalance, “You could wear a potato sack to this thing and your date would still be drooling the entire time. In fact,” he stood up, pretending to walk towards the door, “I think Mom might have one in the pantry. I can go check–”

“Jer!” you grabbed his arm as you tried your best to smother a laugh at his antics and pushed him back on the bed. “Please. Which one?”

He pouted a little as he considered the options, pretending once again to be uber-serious about this. Without meaning to, he found his eyes leaving the red and blue tops you were holding up and wandering to your face. He took it in like he had all the time in the world.

“Red,” he said with an easy smile, which he was glad to see you return with the same ease. If this was all it took to make you smile like that, then he would be more than happy choosing your outfits for an eternity. “You look gorgeous in red. But, any guy would be lucky to see you in either.”

You grinned a little at his flattery and tried to ignore how his compliments made your stomach twist with something that you were all too familiar with when it came to Jeremiah and his sweet talk. “Well then, lucky you, you’ve won the lottery today. You’ve seen me in both.”

He chuckled as he shook his head slightly. “Yeah. Lucky me.”

And he tried his best to ignore the faint pang in his chest as he watched you turn away to face the mirror and fix your hair before going into the bathroom to change tops.

He watched you close the bathroom door and he chewed on his lip nervously – which was not something he normally did. Rip the band-aid off, he found himself thinking. Just tell her.

“[Y/N]?”

“Yeah?” Your muffled voice came from within the bathroom and Jeremiah had to lean against the bathroom door to be able to muster up the courage that he required at this moment.

“I just–” he began, looking down at his feet with one hand against the door and the other on his hip. “I just wanted you to know that…”

“What is it? Is Max here already?” You questioned and he stopped in his tracks when he heard the excitement in your voice.

He could never bring himself to admit it but some wicked, evil part of him wanted your date to go horribly. A small part of him even considered telling you to show him more options for your outfit tonight because he had simply changed his mind about the red, fully knowing that doing this would make you very late to the movie you’re supposed to leave for in a few minutes.

But he also knew, somewhere deep down, that those small, wicked parts of him could easily be triumphed by the larger part of him that just wanted you to be happy. And if someone else could do that for you, then he would let them. Every single time.

“No,” he shook his head and exhaled deeply. “No, I just hope you have fun tonight.”

You opened your door finally and stepped out with a small smile, wearing the red top that he insisted upon. “Thanks, Jere.”

“See?” he teased with a small smirk, “I told you red’s the move.” He winked playfully as he brought a hand to tuck a strand of hair behind your ears.

“Yeah, yeah,” you rolled your eyes and walked once again to your mirror, trying to fix hair that already looked perfect. “What would I do without your brilliant fashion advice?” Maybe it had simply been the frequency of his compliments or the flirty glint in his eye every time he said them, but you had long learned not to take any of what Jeremiah said to heart. He would compliment anything that breathed with the same sincerity.

Jeremiah watched you walk out that evening with a bitter taste in his mouth because you did look gorgeous in red. You looked drop-dead stunning.

And try as he might to tell you of that fact, you wouldn’t really believe it when it came from him. You’d only believe it when it came from someone else.

—

“I am not drunk!” You yelled with finality in your tone and a stance that conveyed utmost defiance.

Well, as defiant as you could possibly look when you were clearly swaying a little with a bottle in hand and slurring your words. You could barely keep your eyes open.

“Okay,” Conrad decided to humour you as he snatched your bottle out of your hands and replaced it with a cup of water. “Drink this anyway.”

“You’re no fun,” You tell Conrad with a pout and he rolls his eyes at you before continuing his deperate search for Jeremiah. All he found were more drunk teenagers, flashing lights and blaring speakers. “Party-pooper.” You accuse.

Conrad wasn’t sure when he had been put on babysitting duty but when he had seen you, drunk out of your mind, climb onto a table and start belting out Beyonce, he knew his help was needed. And though you normally got along with Conrad just fine, with him being just like a big brother to you, he knew that he needed to find Jeremiah to take you home. He was the designated driver, after all.

“Do you know where Jere is?”

“Debbie-downer.” You spat out to Conrad, who couldn’t care less about your conniving insults.

“Seriously, have you seen Jere?” He questioned again and pushed you to take a sip of your water.

“Conrad the killjoy,” you laughed at your own joke a little and Conrad sighed heavily, desperate for someone to take you off his hands.

“Killjoy is spelt with a K, you know.”

“Yeah, well, then so is Konrad.”

Jeremiah, who had been upstairs, knew at once something was wrong when he glanced at his phone and saw 6 missed calls from Conrad and a frantic text from Belly. As he made his way downstairs, he could see you standing with a pout on your face and your arms crossed like a child, with a very exasperated Conrad standing next to you. Jeremiah smiled a little at the sight of your ruffled hair and his brother’s tired look.

“What’s going on here?” He asked finally after reaching the bottom of the stairs and looping one of your arms around his neck to support you to keep you standing upright.

“Finally,” Conrad mumbled under his breath. “You should take her home. Be careful, though,” Conrad cast you a sarcastic look. “She might start spelling your name with a G.”

You stuck your tongue out at him and Conrad continued, “I’ll take a cab with Steven and Belly.”

“No, I’ll take a cab,” You interject pointedly, “You should really drive him home, Jere.”

“Alright, alright,” Jeremiah consoled and held back a snort at Conrad’s unamused expression, “I’ll drive you home first, okay? You’re my favourite out of the two of you, after all.”

As soon as you two stepped out of the house, the cold night air whipped your face and blew your hair back and you found yourself enjoying every second of it. You kept an arm looped around Jeremiah and raised the other one to cheer loudly. You felt warm and bubbly from the inside and your head was spinning in the best way possible. You never wanted this night to end.

“Shhh,” Jeremiah shushed you in between chuckles. “You’re going to wake the entire neighbourhood up.”

“Yeah, so?” You furrowed your eyebrows. “They should not be sleeping right now. There’s a party going on!”

Jeremiah looked at you with incredulous eyes and an amused expression on his face. He couldn’t remember the last time you had gotten this drunk. He couldn’t remember the last time he had gotten that drunk and he had some really wild stories up his sleeve. He smiled to himself as he looked down at the ground. You looked cute when you were so drunk that you had no filter. It was a nice change.

“Alright, come on,” he ushered you into the car when you finally reached it. “All arms and legs inside the vehicle, please.”

“Okay, but I’m not wearing a seatbelt,” you protested as you settled into the passenger seat. Your body relaxed instantly upon making contact with the comfortable seats of the Jeep and you struggled to keep your eyes open as sleep threatened to overcome your senses completely.

“Yes, you are,” Jeremiah countered instantly and grabbed the seat belt buckle. He leaned across your sprawled body in the passenger seat to fasten it and you suddenly could not ignore the frenzy of butterflies in your stomach. He was so close that you could feel his breath fanning across your neck and even in your drunk state, your cheeks burned at the proximity. He fastened the seatbelt with a click and straightened back out with an amused smile once again. “I see what you did there.” He smirked before shutting your car door.

You waited for him to get into the driver’s seat before pressing urgently with a furrow in your eyebrows, “What do you mean?”

“You really couldn’t have put it on by yourself?” He teased with his hands set on the steering wheel.

“Ugh, gross,” you groaned as you realized that you felt all warm and bubbly inside for an entirely different reason now. “I did not do that so you could do that.”

Jeremiah responded with a chuckle and a small ‘sure’, which made you eager to defend your side of the story even more.

“I’m not lying.”

“Admit it, I’m irresistible.” He mocked with an exaggerated hair flip.

“Seriously,” you clarified as you sat up. “Maybe I just wanted to smell your hair.”

Jeremiah’s howls of laughter at this innocent yet glaringly honest confession confused you to no end, as you squinted at him. You were still unsure of what was so funny about that fact. His hair did smell nice.

“Drunk you is really bad at flirting,” Jeremiah said with a playful lilt in his tone, which perfectly masked his true feelings at the moment. He wished, more than anything, that you would flirt with him for real. But he also knew that you didn’t see him that way, and maybe you never really would. It was cathartic in a way to tease you so relentlessly. It almost made it feel real to him.

“I’m not flirting,” you claimed once again. “And, you really shouldn’t be flirting with me either, you know.” You said offhandedly, not thinking much about what you were saying.

Jeremiah’s smile instantly dropped at your remark. “What do you mean?” he mustered up, already feeling horribly guilty. He braced himself for what he knew was to come – he was sure that you were about to tell him that your boyfriend had brought it up with you. Max probably felt threatened and –

“Gigi,” you said softly. “I saw you two go up into that room.” And it was true. You had seen them together and your heart had dropped. Despite the fact that you had your actual boyfriend beside you for most of the night, you couldn't help but feel betrayed at the sight of Jeremiah with someone else. You quickly pushed the feeling out of your head and grabbed the nearest drink, finding the only solace from your broken heart in your drunk state.

Jeremiah’s head was suddenly spinning as he clutched the steering wheel tighter and tried to take a quick look at you before setting his eyes back on the road. He tried to dismiss the thoughts in his brain that were ecstatic at the faint jealous tone in your sentence.

“No, no,” he shook his head. Jeremiah desperately tried to find the words to tell you that Gigi and him had only talked – how he had made it clear that he wasn’t looking for anything romantic with her. “Gigi and I–”

“It’s fine, Jere, really,” you affirmed as you tried to shoot him a small smile. “You don’t have to lie to me. I just… We’re both with different people now and you’re my best friend so maybe you and I should just… dial it back a little, I don’t know.”

Just as quickly as those ecstatic thoughts had rushed into his head, they now fled. It became clear to him now that this was about Max. You were not jealous. You probably didn’t care about him and Gigi at all. He tried to regain his composure as he cracked a small smile.

“Yeah,“ he agreed quietly. “Your boyfriend probably thinks I’m in love with you or something.” He tried to joke but the attempt was weak at best.

“Yeah,” you half-smiled in agreement. “Gigi probably thinks I’m in love with you.” You spared a glance at him for a moment too long, causing him to look back. You cleared your throat hurriedly, “Or something.”

Jeremiah focused on the road that stretched out in front of him as he willed himself not to look back at you. It would’ve been easy to rip off the band-aid then, to just blurt out his true feelings and leave you to deal with the aftermath. He knew it would’ve been easy but he also knew that it would’ve been incredibly selfish.

With a lapse in self-control, he risked a glance at you and found you sound asleep, with your eyes shut in what he could only imagine as blissful slumber. He smiled as he turned his eyes back on the road. He was glad that at least one of you two would be sleeping so soundly tonight.

—

The breakup had been surprisingly easy. The aftermath, however, had been the exact opposite.

When Max had dumped you two days before the deb ball, you hadn’t thought much of it. Your relationship was barely three weeks old and you were really only waiting for the shoe to drop. When it finally did, you felt almost relieved. You were practically yawning through Max’s “it’s not you, it’s me” routine.

That feeling of freedom and relief were quickly snatched from you when you realized just how bad Max’s timing was. With the deb ball two days away, you were left with no date and absolutely no prospects. Conrad was going with Belly already, Steven with Shayla and you didn’t need to ask Jere to know what he would say to being your escort. That guy had sworn off balls years ago.

“Maybe you could just, like, be a group of three with us,” suggested Belly with a hopeful smile plastered on her face. “Conrad wouldn’t mind… I don’t think.”

You gave her an unamused look as you buried your head in your pillows. “Do we know the same Conrad?”

“Fine, then what do you suggest?” Belly questioned as she flopped onto your bed as well. “You’re really going to go alone?”

“What choice do I have?”

“You could ask J–.”

“Absolutely not,” you countered right away. There was no way you were going to ask him, especially considering how you knew his answer already. No matter the reasons behind it, a rejection from him would still hurt.

“Why not?” Belly whined. “He’s perfect for you. I’m sure he can make an exception to his rule if you were to ask.”

You raised your head to squint at Belly. “Why would he make an exception for me?”

“You know why.”

“No, I do not.” You tried to ignore the burning in your cheeks once again.

“You’re so childish, [Y/N],” Belly sighed. “That guy’s been in love with you since you two were like toddlers.”

“That is simply not true,” you muttered, wishing that Belly would drop the subject altogether. “Next!” You announced only to be met with a groan from Belly.

After countless suggestions and exhausted minds, Belly suggested that you take the easy way out of this mess.

“Just call Max,” she whined, running a tired hand over her face. “Tell him he still has to take you to the ball and then you two can go your separate ways or whatever.”

And so, you had. You had called Max at the opportune hour of 2 AM and he had agreed before making sure that ‘there was absolutely no romantic subtext attached to this, right?’ You had scoffed at what he was trying to imply. As if.

It was that eventful night’s ingenious brainstorming which had landed you in this mess today.

The ball was about to start in five minutes and all you could do was stare at the curt text that Max had sent you a minute ago. You read over it again and again in feeble hopes that that would make it seem more insignificant – like if you read it enough times, it would somehow be less humiliating.

But the truth of the matter was that Max had bailed on you at the very last minute – literally – and your name was about to be announced, summoning you and your escort to the stage. You looked around desperately, in hopes that perhaps you could send someone else ahead of you or if worst comes to worst, slip out of the back door yourself but none of those options seemed particularly feasible. As you looked at the other side of the stage, where Max was supposed to be standing, you saw nothing but darkness.

“[Y/N] [Y/L/N],” the announcer called with his booming voice. “Daughter of…” It had suddenly become hard to breathe in your flowing dress and you were sure that your makeup had practically melted off your face by now. You closed your eyes and took a deep breath in. It’s fine, you told yourself, repeating it like a chant. I’m fine.

You took small steps forward, trying desperately to sync them with your breathing to avoid any disasters until you were standing on stage with a bouquet in your hand and no date by your side. You forced a smile on your face but it evidently did not look as convincing as you wanted it to as a few murmurs broke out amongst the crowd. You scanned the crowd until your eyes landed on your table, with a concerned looking Susannah and a horrified looking Laurel. Your own mother’s expression was a mixture of both.

“[Y/N] attends…” even the announcer trailed off as he peered behind the stage to check where your escort had gone.

“Sorry!” Jeremiah appeared suddenly at your side, announcing his apology to the whole crowd. “I had to use the bathroom. Had too much to drink.” He smiled apologetically to the announcer before turning to you to send you a wink. He flashed one of his dashing smiles and offered you his arm before turning back to the crowd to pose for photos. You blinked a few times to make sure you weren’t dreaming.

“What are you doing?” you whispered to him as quietly as you could manage. You were well acquainted with Jere’s ‘no balls’ policy. Clearly, everyone else was too, as the murmurs in the crowd did not die down as he appeared by your side on the stage. They only seemed to grow, with some surprised and others outraged.

“Being your knight in shining armour, what do you think I’m doing?” he whispered back with a smug smile. He was seriously considering sending Max a gift hamper for letting him have this opportunity.

“Jere,” you began again. “You really don’t have to. Seriously, I’m fi–”

“Shhh,” he cut you off, gently tapping your arm. “Face the front and let everyone see how jaw-droppingly beautiful you look in white.”

“I thought red was ‘the move’ on me?” You retorted with a small smile. This guy really was an angel sent from above.

“You could wear anything and it would be ‘the move’,” he told you matter-of-factly with a small smirk as he kept facing the cameras. “Although…”

“What?”

“I’m sure you could wear nothing and it would still be ‘the move’.”

“Shut up!” You reprimanded with a shocked laugh. You were used to his flirting but he had never been quite as forward before. Jeremiah stifled a few chuckles as cameras kept flashing. Finally, the announcer gestured for you two to walk forward to stand on the dance floor as the last few debutantes got their time on the stage.

You took your place standing beside Belly and Conrad and couldn’t help but shake your head as Belly turned to smile at you. Her grin was so big you feared it would split her face in half.

“Told you he’d make an exception,” she mouthed slowly, making sure that you understood each word she’s intending for you. Conrad smirked silently, watching the two of you standing together. Even Steven waved to grab your attention to wriggle his eyebrows at you suggestively. You rolled your eyes at them all.

“What’s Belly saying?” Jeremiah peered from behind you at the smiling girl.

“Nothing,” you cleared your throat. “She’s just surprised you’re doing this. With your infamous ‘no balls’ policy and all.”

Jeremiah let out a small ‘ah’ as he nodded in understanding with a small smile on his face.

“So,” you pressed on with raised eyebrows. “Why are you doing this?” You bid your time with bated breaths as you waited for his answer to come. You really hoped it was the answer you wanted to hear.

“Because I look ridiculously handsome in a tux,” he joked half-heartedly. A storm was raging within him and he had no idea what answer to give you.

“No other reason?” you questioned hesitantly.

Jeremiah knew that this was as good of a time as any. He could finally just tell you. He could rip the band-aid off and never look back again. Max was out of the picture now, clearly, as he abandoned you tonight. Gigi had never been in the picture at all. He had no reasons to keep the truth from you anymore. He had always stopped himself in the past with your happiness in mind. But now, standing beside you and remembering the elated smile that you had given him when he ran onto the stage to be beside you, he was sure that he could make you happy.

He knew he would choose your happiness every single time. Only this time, he’s choosing his own too.

“And, because,” he started with a shaky breath that seemed too uncharacteristic of him. His teasing demeanour had dropped altogether. “I just… Shit. I want you to know that–”

“Alright, ladies and gentlemen,” the announcer boomed, causing everyone to turn back to look at him.

You kept your eyes on Jere as you pressed on. “Know what?”

“I…”

“Can all escorts make their way to the dance floor, please?”

Jeremiah sighed heavily as he realized he had run out of time. “I’ll tell you later, okay?” He squeezed your hand and pressed a dramatic kiss to it. “For now, prepare to be amazed by my dancing skills.”

Except, there was no ‘later’ that night. Jeremiah had no idea how quickly the night would turn sour for him, all because of a simple email that he wasn’t meant to see.

—

Jeremiah loved the beach. He wasn’t sure when the obsession with the feel of the sand running through his fingers or the sound of the tumultuous waves had started but his favourite memories of his childhood always included beaches.

They also always included his mom.

In his mind’s eye, he could see countless times when Susannah had been lounging on a chair with a large sun hat draping her eyes and the sun beating down on her while he and Conrad surfed in the water. He remembered how Susannah used to seat him on her lap, while Conrad ran around chasing seagulls, claiming he was ‘far too old to sit on laps’.

“Your eyes remind me of the ocean, Jere,” Susannah would tell him as she held the little boy in her arms. “They’re so blue. So pretty.” He would smile at her mother’s affection and bat his eyes at her dramatically, which always made her erupt into giggles.

He couldn’t remember when these frequent trips to the beach with his mom had become so rare. As he sat on the sand now, looking out into the ocean, he couldn’t help but smile sadly. He had no idea if he could have another beach trip with her. He had no idea how much time he would be able to have with her at all.

The sky was painted a somber gray as a storm threatened to rage in the distance. He could feel a few drops on his skin as he took the ocean in. Early mornings at the beach always held a different type of allure for him.

“Hey,” you tapped his shoulder gently, careful not to startle him.

He turned around at once, with a smile on his face. Your heart broke a little at the sight. Jeremiah had always presented himself as an easy-going guy. He was cheerful at all times, always concerned with bringing a genuine smile to others’ faces before worrying about the genuinity of his own emotions.

“Hey,” he smiled but his eyes didn’t exactly translate. They didn't gleam like they usually did.

“How are you?” you asked hesitantly as you took a seat beside him, nudging his shoulder lightly. “How are you, really?”

“Fine, I guess,” he said with a gulp and a bitter smile. Both of you sat in silence for a while as the only sounds heard were the waves in the distance.

“She loves you a lot, you know,” Jeremiah broke the silence, turning to look at you. He held your eyes as he continued. “She never stops talking about you." He shook his head fondly. "Especially when I’m there.”

You give him a small smile before furrowing your eyebrows playfully. “Why ‘especially when you’re there’?”

“She always wanted us to be together,” Jere said without thinking about it too much. He didn’t risk a glance at you as he continued as honestly as he possibly could. “I think she’s been planning our wedding ever since I gave you that rose to put in your hair when we were, like, ten years old.” He laughed softly at the thought.

“Really?” You asked incredulously as heat started creeping up your neck. Jeremiah couldn’t help but smirk at you as he could see how flustered you grew with every second.

And that gave him the strength to finally rip the band-aid off.

“Yeah,” he nodded once as he turned away to look at the water again. “I’ve been planning our wedding for much longer, though.”

You smiled at his flirting as you shook your head but when you looked at his face, your smile dropped completely. He held your eyes and your breath hitched in your throat as you noticed how devoid of playfulness they were. You gulped as you opened your mouth to say something but couldn’t find anything. You were, quite literally, speechless.

“I think I knew it at six years old,” Jeremiah continued quietly as he kept his eyes on you. It was too late to turn back. No matter the outcome, he had to rip it off. “It was pretty silly then. I was already convinced I was your boyfriend.” He smiled at the memory. “And then at twelve, when we were watching the Notebook with Mom and Laurel and your mom, I remember peeking over at you and just knowing. I knew that you were my Allie. If I had to write letters to some girl for 365 days in a row, it would be you. Every single time. If I had to hang off a ferris wheel to get your attention, I would do that, too. And I hate ferris wheels.” He deadpanned in hopes of earning a laugh from you but you sat there, dumbfounded.

“Wh–?” You tried to get out but Jeremiah stopped you. He needed to get all of this out. He took your hand and gave it a gentle squeeze before running his thumb across it.

“I knew that I was a total goner, though, when other guys started getting your attention and I still didn’t say anything,” he continued honestly. “I couldn’t bring myself to. I wanted you so, so bad but most of all, I just wanted you to be happy. And if Max made you happy or that creepy guy from the gas station that you dated for like four hours made you happy, then I would let them. I still just want you to be happy. And I get it if you don’t like me in that way–” he tried to clarify before you cut him off.

“You make me happy, Jere,” you managed to get out with utmost sincerity. It felt as if your heart was about to burst. “You’ve always made me the happiest. Not Max and definitely not the creepy gas station guy.”

“Yeah?” He asked as his heart skipped a beat.

“Yeah,” you confirmed with a nod as your cheeks hurt from smiling so wide. Jeremiah’s eyes scanned your face then, just as he had always scanned your face – with love, with patience. This time, though, he was pleased to see you scan his face the same way. And none of you were trying to hide it anymore. The band-aid had finally come off.

“Do I have permission to kiss the bride, then?” he asked quietly as his eyes landed on your lips, both of you leaning towards each other.

“Depends,” you smirked. “I need to see the wedding plans first. I don’t trust any plans that you’ve made.” Jeremiah chuckled and his breath fanned across your face. “Especially if they were made by six-year-old you.”

“You sure?” he teased. “A LEGO wedding sounds pretty nice. Six-year-old me had some great ideas.”

“Shut up,” you laughed against his lips before finally leaning over to close the space.

It was hard to think as your lips met his pillow-soft ones. He kissed you senseless as he brought a soft hand to your jaw to pull you impossibly closer. He tasted so incredibly sweet and he smelled of the ocean and mint and something so indescribably Jere – so familiar yet so exhilarating. Your hands found the hair at the nape of his neck and you tugged them absentmindedly, making Jeremiah smirk into the kiss. It would be an understatement to say this was better than he could ever imagine in his dreams. It was like a shot of adrenaline for him to be so close to you, and he found himself wondering how he survived his whole life without it before.

You pulled away when you felt the first drop of rain land on your face and he looked up as he smiled. Of course it had started to rain. How very the Notebook of the universe. He looked back down to you and smirked as he tucked a strand of hair behind your ear.

“By the way,” you smiled at him. “I knew you were my Noah, too. If there was one guy I had to keep coming back to, no matter what, it would be you. Always.”

He exhaled with relief and happiness and excitement and – quite possibly every emotion he could feel at that moment. “It’s only fitting for us to recreate the rain scene, then,” he flashed a smile as he tried to calm his thumping heart, adding a wink for good measure.

You told him to shut up for the second time that day and he dutifully obeyed. He wasn’t that interested in talking, anyway.

And, Jeremiah knew the next few months were going to be difficult. But for a moment, here with you, everything seemed alright. And he knew that it eventually would be, as long as he has you by his side.

2K notes · View notes

enhaheeseung · 11 months

Text

Cubical crush pt. 2 - L. Heeseung

💻PAIRING: Heeseung X fem reader!

⌨️WARNINGS: mentions of sex but no smut, alcohol, age gap, cursing,fluff, heeseung makes numerous sexual jokes, heeseung says fuck a lot pt 2 heeseung and reader are still both dumb asf lol.

🖱️GENRE: co-workers, best friends to lover’s, comedy, romance.

🖥️SUMMARY: after you and heeseung patch things up, it seems there’s no way to avoid your feelings for him, and it didn’t seem like he was going to let you either.

WC: 5,714

Masterlist (working on fixing the links)

Part 1 (highly suggest reading that first)

NOTE: hello, again, I decided to give you all a part 2 of “cubical crush” Thank you for all the positive feedback on the first part. As I stated previously, it’s a little different from how I usually write, but I’m happy with the way it came out, and it made me laugh a lot. But, anyways, like always, I hope you all enjoy it, and it’s good to be back.🖤 also the punctuation is off but i was too lazy to fix it.

After you and heeseung were back to being normal with each other, you couldn’t help but miss his cute flirty behavior, and as of late, he was looking absolutely fucking edible, which wasn’t helping at all.

But come to think of it. You actually were glad he wasn’t flirting with you anymore cause, with his new look, you definitely wouldn’t have been able to resist him.

He had recently got a haircut. It was slicked back, showing off his pretty forehead and shaved sides sculpting his face perfectly. He smelled delicious, and today he just decided to wear a black dress shirt paired with black slacks and a red tie.

Today was going to be a rough day.

“Morning, ms y/n,” he greeted you casually, knowing just how much you fucking hated it when he called you Ms.

But today, you didn’t care. His voice was still deep from it being early in the morning, and you’d be lying if you said it didn’t make you feel a tingle between your legs.

“Morning, Seung,” you replied and didn’t snap back at him the way you usually do when he greeted you like that.

“Woah, what the fuck was that, and where the fuck is the y/n I’m used to?” He looked at you with his brows furrowed in confusion.

“What do you mean?” You spun your chair around, laughing quietly at his expression.

“Why aren’t you ripping my head off right now? I just called you, ms, and you hate being called Ms” He set your coffee down on your desk and took a small sip of his.

“I’m just having a good day, that’s all” You smiled brightly at him, and now he was starting to worry cause this was not like you at all.

“Are you sick?“ he placed his palm on your forehead, and your face instantly got hot from his touch. “You feel like you have a fever,” he pouted.

“What?!” You pushed his hand away. “I’m fine. I told you I’m just having a good day. Can’t I have a good day?” You smiled brightly again.

“No, you fucking can’t, not around me and especially if you’re going to be smiling at me like you’re some type of fucking serial killer.”

“I might be,” you shrug, and his face instantly morphed. You couldn’t believe that he actually got genuinely scared. “I’m joking!”

He wordlessly walked to his little workspace next to yours, turning his computer on.

“Seung, I’m serious. I’m just joking” You should have known he would have been paranoid, especially after all the b rated horror films you watched together on movie nights.

“You better fucking be!” He shrieks.

You couldn’t help but cackle at the sound of his high-pitched voice next door to you.

He was always so fun to tease.

“I’m tired” It was only past morning, but oddly enough, you were already tired.

“Come on, sleepy butt, it’s lunchtime,” heeseung spoke lowly across from you.

“Wait, I’m almost done” That was the workaholic in you speaking. Despite being tired, you always had to keep going until you felt like you put in enough work to earn a break.

“You and me both already know that’s a load of bull crap. You’ll be saying the same thing in an hour from now,” he says, still typing away at his own computer.

“No,” you whined. “Seung, just five more minutes, I promise.”

“Seung, just five more minutes,” he mimicked your whiny tone.

He shut off his computer and entered your personal space leaning down and closing out all the tabs you had opened. “No! Seung!”

“Yes! Y/n!” you turned to your side, and he was dangerously close to you. His neck looked so inviting, especially his Adam’s apple. You were so close to just saying fuck it and letting him take you right then and there, but you snapped out of it.

The poor guy was so completely unaware of all the dirty thoughts you were having about him as he was shutting down your computer.

He made the mistake of looking over at you when he felt your eyes on him. He was so much closer than he initially realized. His eyes quickly darted to your lips, but he shifted his gaze to your eyes instead. “Ready?” He asked, standing up straight and clearing his throat.

“Uhh, y-yeah,” you stuttered.

“So, how did you like working with the new trainee?” You said with a bit of curiosity in your tone.

“Y/n, we talked about this already. I was just trying to make you jealous we were never close,” he explained.

“Yeah, and it worked, you asshole. You have some nerve inviting her to lunch with you.”

“I did what it took to make you notice me” He shrugged.

You glared at him, disgusted by his audacity. “But seriously, did you like it?” You ask, and you may or may not have been secretly comparing yourself to her.

“No,” he deadpanned.

“Why? She seemed…” you trailed off, hoping he’d say what he thought about her.

“Bitchy?” He finished your statement for you.

“I was gonna say enthusiastic,” you laughed.

“Yeah, Enthusiastic for my eggplant,” he scoffed.

“You did not just say that,” you say in disbelief.

“Fine, my banana” You glared at him, an unamused look etching its way to your features. He tapped his chin in thought. “Chili pepper!” You could only stare at him with a disgusted look on your face, and it just kept getting worse and worse the longer he went on. “Oh, I know, my anaconda!” He smiled while proudly nodding his head as if he had actually done something.

A disapproving sigh fell from your lips, and you just shook your head at him disappointedly.

“Fine,” he rolled his eyes. “Anyway, she was literally throwing herself all over me, and how the fuck am I supposed to work when she’s screaming right next to my fucking ear? I’m glad she’s gone” He shivered at just the thought of her high pitched voice and cheap smelling perfume.

Well, then, I guess I was worried about her for no reason. You thought to yourself.

“But she was pretty, successful, and young.” something you weren’t. “You should have got her number” Yet again, here you are, selling yourself short and comparing yourself to others.

Now it was his turn to glare at you. “I don’t care. She could have been rich, and I still wouldn’t have cared, and besides, I like my girls just a little bit older than that,” he smiled and winked at you.

“Pervert”

He gasped, feigning offense. “How does that make me a pervert? It’s not like I’m into grannies.”

“You might be,” you replied with a shrug of your shoulders.

“Oh, yeah, I think that would give breaking her back a whole new meaning” A dry chuckle fell from his lips as he rolled his eyes.

“I'm trying to eat here,” you said, offended while covering your food.

“You brought it up,” he defended himself.

“Anyways, speaking of eating, I was wondering if you wanted to have dinner at my place tonight.”

“Ooh, is the one and only ms y/n asking me on a date” He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.

“You wish Lee no woman in her right mind would ask you on a date” You dismiss his silly comment, but it still made your heart flutter.

“Except you, cause you’re not in your right mind. You’re a fucking psycho.”

“Just do you want to or not,” you said, getting fed up with his behavior when he was working next to you the age gap seemed nonexistent with how professional he was but in times like these, it was very evident just how immature he actually was.

“Don’t get all sassy on me. You’re asking a stupid question, duh. Of course, I want to”

“I can’t believe you and me can never have just one normal conversation,” you sighed.

“What’s not normal about shit-talking your old co-workers having sex with grannies, and asking me on a date?”

“I hate your guts” You shook your head, and you’re not sure why you even accepted this clown back into your life, to begin with.

“But you love it when I’m all up in yours,” he stated with a smile on his face accompanied by a flirtatious wink.

“Asshole,” you glared at him.

“Are we talking about yours? Cause I love it. I could lick it all da-“

You kicked his shin under the table to stop him from talking nonsense.

“Ow! Crazy bitch” he mumbled while rubbing his shin that would probably be bruised by tomorrow from your assault.

“What did you say!?” You asked with your eyes wide.

“I said I love you.” He smiled past the pain.

“That’s what I thought” You smiled while his face contorted into a grimace as the pain started to kick in.

After your very eventful lunch, it was soon time to go home.

“So, what’s on the menu?” He slid his chair back using his feet to roll it next to yours.

“Umm,” you hum in thought, but your brain comes up with nothing. “you pick,” you say as you clear off your desk.

“How about pussy with a side of ass?” He giggles.

“Are you addicted to sex or something?” You gave him a judging look.

“No, but I’m addicted to you,” so maybe you didn’t miss his flirting as much as you originally thought you did cause he was really wearing you out today, and he hadn’t been this obvious since you first met.

“Whatever. Are you ready to go now?” You shifted the topic to something else.

“Yep, Oh, and I made this for you” He reached over to his desk and handed you a little heart-shaped origami that he made.

“Aww, it’s so cute. Since when did you learn to make this?” You ask while examining the cute little paper heart.

“Since my computer crashed and I had nothing to do for an hour straight so, I watched videos on my phone and learned how to make it,” he explained.

“I feel so special,” you say in a sappy way.

“Don’t! I made one for everybody” He looks in your opposite direction as if he was trying to prove to you that you really weren’t special.

“Ha! Liar!” You point at his face and laugh.

“Fine,” he threw his hands up in the air. “I didn’t, but don’t get all big-headed 'cause you’re not even that special” He folded his arms and pretended to be annoyed.

“So, I’m special but not that special,” you frown.

“If I had a dollar for every time you annoyed me, I’d have more money than I could spend in a lifetime” He tried to ignore the cute little frown on your lips but failed.

You pouted and looked up at him with a hurt expression on your face. “Sorry, I wasn’t trying to be,” you mumbled sadly.

His eyes instantly widened with panic. “I’m just joking, y/n, don’t be sad,” he rushed out while trying to fix his mistake. He was literally just playing around. He would never intentionally hurt your feelings.

“I’ll try not to annoy you anymore” You looked down at your feet.

“Y/n….” he pulled you into a hug. “I didn’t mean it. I love it when you banter back and forth with me. It’s the only thing that keeps my day interesting” He rubbed his palms over your back, sighing into your hair and gently rocking you back and forth in his arms.

You smirked evilly. He was literally so easy to fool. “Got you!” You said in a teasing tone, giggling when you felt his whole body stiffen.

He pulled away from the hug to see you laughing in his face. He glared at you and pushed you out of his way, yanking his suitcase off his desk and mumbling something that sounded a lot like fucking bitch as he walked off to the elevator with you chasing closely behind him, still giggling at his irritated figure, smashing the buttons on the elevator.

“Hahaha, so funny, hilarious” his words only made you laugh more, so of course, he continued just to hear you laugh again. “The funniest girl on the planet,” he said with sarcasm laced in his tone. You clutched onto your stomach and leaned into him from laughing so hard. Truthfully, what you said wasn’t even that funny, but his annoyed expression always tickled you.

He looked at you with a small smile while you leaned against him, and the only thing he thought in that moment was just how much he truly enjoyed spending time with you. He’d never take moments like this for granted cause it was times like these that just reminded him how truly special you were and how lucky he was to have you in his life.

He tilted his head and leaned into you, laughing along with you in the small space of the elevator.

It was then and there that he felt butterflies erupt in his stomach, and he was undoubtedly deeply in love with you.

On the way to your house, he made a quick stop at the corner store, and you were starting to regret letting him drive cause you just wanted to go home. “I’m gonna get some beer. Do you want anything?”

“Nope, I’m good,” you reply tiredly.

“Sure? Don’t ask me for anything when I get back.”

“I’m sure now, just hurry up and go in. I’m tired,” you whined.

“Aww, poor baby is tired,” he had a fake sympathetic look on his face, but it instantly fell flat. “that makes two of us” He slammed the door behind him on purpose, making you flinch.

You could see him laughing on his way into the store. “Asshole!” You rolled down the window and shouted.

He got his beer and was set to leave, but something caught his eye. It was your favorite candy, so how could he not get it for you?

He paid for the items and went back to the car.

When he reached for the knob, the door didn’t open. He saw you with an evil smile on your face as he frantically tried to open the door to no avail. “Come on, y/n, it’s not funny.”

“And slamming the door in my face wasn’t funny either,” you say unbothered.

“Come on, y/n, it's freezing out here,” he said, shivering in the cold weather.

“Not my problem,” you reply and blow a breath on your nails, then polish them on your blazer.

“And when I make you suck my balls to warm them up, that’s not gonna be my problem either” You couldn’t believe this idiot, even in nearly below whether he had time to make inappropriate jokes.

“Apologize, and I’ll let you in,” you smirked.

“Okay, okay, I’m sorry, just let me in” You unlocked the door for him since he asked Nicely. “You’re mean” He buckled his belt and blew warm air onto his hands before pulling out of the parking lot and finishing the journey to your home. “I know you said you didn’t want anything, but I bought you some candy anyway” He reached inside the bag and handed it to you.

“Oh, well, how sweet of you,” you say sarcastically while rolling your eyes and opening the packet of candy, eating it right away.

“Don’t eat it then dickhead” he replied, unfazed by your shitty comment. “Note to self never buy an ungrateful bitch anything” He checked it off of his invisible list.

“Please, just shut the fuck up and take me home.”

“I love it when you degrade me makes me feel like dropping to my knees an-“ you literally covered your ears to blot out whatever sickness he was saying now. Once you saw him chuckling, you figured it was safe and moved your hands from the sides of your head.

Thank goodness you were a few minutes from home cause any longer with him in this car, and you probably would have made him get into a car crash.

You both had dinner, and now you were doing your normal routine, watching a movie together on the couch. “Do you think he’s gonna find her?” Heeseung whispered with his head resting in your lap, so invested in the horror movie that played on the screen.

The girl in question was hiding under a truck inside a barn with a hand cupping her mouth as she watched the killer's feet taking strides in her direction. “I think so” you whispered back.

“Why doesn’t she get from under the truck and run” You giggled silently at the fact that’s he whispering as if his voice could be heard through the screen.

Just then, the murderer appeared out of nowhere, and he was face to face with the girl under the truck pulling her out by her ponytail, and you don’t know who was screaming louder, the girl on the screen or heeseung.

He snuggled up closer to you as the killer raised his machete. The camera focused on the object, reflecting the dim barn lighting as blood from the previous killings had dripped down the blade heeseung quickly scrambled and grabbed the remote shutting off the tv.

“Really?” You said in disbelief. “Are you seriously that scared of a b rated horror movie?”

“Did you see what he was about to do to her?!” He said, trying to make you understand his point of view.

“Yeah, but it’s like all fake,” you stated the obvious.

“But still!” He pouted, sitting back down on the couch.

“Fine, do you want to watch light year instead?”

“Yes!” He cheered while nodding his head like a baby.

“I can’t believe I have an overgrown baby in my house” You grabbed the remote and put stupid light year on, not to say you really cared as long as he was enjoying it, so were you.

He laid his head in your lap once again as his eyes focused on the screen.

You don’t know why, but you started running your fingers through his hair, making a shiver run down his spine. He closed his eyes and let out a content sigh. Your touch felt so warm and comforting that he wished he could feel you like this every day. He hummed when your fingertips grazed his ear slightly.

“If you keep doing that, you’re gonna make me fall for you even harder,” he warned playfully, and you removed your hand.

He sat up straight, this time looking you into your eyes. “I know you said to forget about it, but I just want to know one thing, and I’ll never speak of it again. The other night when we were together, what made you agree in the first place.” He asked, hoping maybe deep down, at some point, you actually felt something for him. Yeah, he knew he was reaching, but it couldn’t hurt to ask.

Fuck, shit, shit fuck, and more fucking fuck shit.

You bit on your lip nervously before finally just deciding to tell him the truth. What was the point in lying anyway? You guys told each other literally everything, and it felt uncomfortable to hide anything from him. Even if it changed your relationship forever, you had to get the weight off your chest that you’d been carrying for years. “Cause I like you” You squinted one eye shut, waiting for his reaction.

“Come on, y/n. I’m being serious here.” He laughed.

“Me too,” you mumbled.

“Oh…” he still didn’t know what to believe. You had to be joking or playing a prank on him. Yeah, that was the only logical explanation he could come up with. “Nice try, but I’m not falling for it this time.”

You sighed. “I do, I like you so much, and I have for a long time. It’s just I can’t be with you, me, and you can never work,” you said sadly.

“Why? If you like me too, then what’s the problem?” In all the years you’ve known him, you’ve never heard him speak so seriously before.

You sighed. And figured you might as well just let everything out now.

“Cause I’m no good for you seung you’re young I’m old you’re good looking I’m not I’m just barely making it in my career at thirty-two, and you’re right behind me at the age of twenty-two, overall, you’re just out of my league you deserve someone better, and I don’t want to keep holding you back” in your head that was good reasoning not to be with him but he just found it plain stupid.

“In the most polite way possible in the many years we’ve known each other, that’s literally the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard you say, and believe me, you’ve said some pretty stupid fucking things.”

You looked at him feeling somewhat offended by his choice of words after you had just spilled your heart out to him. He was making light of your issues, but you quickly realized that you were taking him the wrong way.

“First of all, you’re a fucking goddess, second. I love the fact that you’re older than me. Girls my age just aren’t as driven as you are. I find that so attractive about you, and thirdly, I just really fucking like you for you, not your age, not your career, not your looks, just you and what makes you you, and for the record, I would have never been any of the things you listed out if it wasn’t for you. You got me a job. You gave me something to look up to. You’ve been with me through thick and thin, hell. You even taught me how to dress,” he chuckled at the realization remembering his first day at the office when he wore the most uncoordinated outfit in his closet. He realized just how long you two have been together, and he wouldn’t change it for the world.

“That’s a lot of you’s,” you smiled, getting a bit teary eyed from his words.

“It’s impossible not to say you a million times when we’re together, and as bad as it sounds, my whole life revolves around you.” He held your hand and placed a delicate kiss on the back of it.

You couldn’t help but look at him with eyes full of love, and the words you said to him next were long overdue. “I love you” You all but tackled him in a hug, a few tears of joy slipping from your eyes while you did so.

“Finally, you admit it” He hugged you back as tight as he possibly could without crushing you. “I love you too” He leaned back to get a good look at your face before giving you a quick smooch, and of course, things could never be serious with him, but that’s what you loved about him. He was always just so carefree around you, and that made you happy. “Now, it’s your turn to list all the things you like about me,” he smiled giddily while pointing to himself.

“Not in a million years, you dork” He pouted instantly at your words. “Okay, fine.” You rolled your eyes playfully. “I love working with you every day and your constant teasing. I love all the little things you do to cheer me up when I’m having a bad day,” you said shyly.

“Ooh, I like this continue,” he nodded in his head, approving of everything you said so far.

Wow, he really had no shame. You thought.

“I love when you bring me coffee in the morning and massage my shoulders, and I just love you. I love the way you love me” You booped his cute not so little nose.

“You’re gonna make my heart explode if you keep talking to me like that,” you giggled.

“Oh, and one more thing,” you made a come hither motion with your index finger, and he leaned in closer so you could whisper in his ear. “I love the way you make love to me.”

He leaned back and looked at you with an unreadable expression before He stood up and threw you over his shoulder but not before turning off the tv.

“Seung, put me down!” you squeal and hit his back lightly.

“No, can do, ms y/n. I’m going to take you to infinity and beyond,” he spanked your butt while jogging upstairs to your bedroom, giggling.

He laid you down on your mattress, hovering over you with a smile. “You’re such a nerd,” you whisper breathlessly against his lips.

“A nerd that you love,” he smiled and pecked your lips.

That was only the start of your long adventurous night with him.

You woke up with heeseung sleeping directly on top of you naked and all with his head buried in your neck and legs tangled together with yours. It was a wonder how you were even able to sleep last night cause he was literally all over you.

After a few minutes, you thought he’d wake up, but no, you had to stay under him like that for a whole hour until your limbs started feeling numb. You decided to run your fingers along his back gently to wake him. “Baby?”

“Hmm?” Good, he’s finally awake, you thought.

He stirred in his sleep, pushing his face even further into the crook of your neck, and it’s almost like he somehow put even more of his weight on you, not to say you minded, though.

“Baby?” You called out to him again, and this time you didn’t get any response.

He literally replied with soft snores next to your ear, and for a split second, you may have regretted having him stay the night. Well, he begged you to stay the night, and you said yes.

“Seung, we have to go to work,” you poked his shoulder.

Another soft snore.

You pinched his butt, and he popped up immediately. “Ouch!” He sat up while wiping the sleep from his eyes. “Why did you do that?” He pouted and rubbed his bottom.

“Cause yo- we need to go before we’re late,” you told him.

“Okay, but you could have just woken me up by rubbing my back or something.”

You could only look at him with a blank stare. He was literally unbelievable.

“Can we match today?” He asked, looking a little bit too cute for his own good.

“Sure, cutie” You kissed his cheek and ran to the shower while his face got redder by the second.

He plopped down on the bed and buried his face into your pillows. “Gosh, I’m so in love with that woman,” he says to himself while you were running the shower, or he thought you were anyway.

“And I’m so in love with you,” you giggled at the shocked look on his face. “Are you joining me or not?”

He squeaks upon seeing your presence in the doorway. “You heard?!”

“Yes! Now hurry up and get in here, lover boy, or else we’re going to be late.”

“Okay! I’m coming!” He hopped out of bed and joined you in the shower.

“Do you want to fool around, get freaky deaky touchy-feely?” This fool has to nerve to ask you as he washes your back with his large hands.

“Do you want to be late? Do you want a little ding on your record? Do you want to get yelled out by our boss?” You remind him.

“No, but why are you bringing that up? It has nothing to do with my question” At this point, you couldn’t tell when he was being serious or joking around.

“Why do I love you again? Like, please remind me,” you say as you take your body poof and spin him around so you could wash his back.

“Good question, but if you’re asking me, I’d say it’s cause I ate you out so good last night” He smiled proudly, remembering how many times he made you cum last night just with his tongue.

“Must be cause a baboon has better understanding skills than you.”

He really turned around and looked at you like he was hurt by what you said. “You don’t really mean that, right?” He pouted. He must’ve really thought you were serious.

“No, of course not, baby” You pressed a kiss to his cheek to reassure him, and he smiled brightly.

“You called me baby just now. I like it. It’s cute” He encircled your waist, allowing you to wash his chest.

“Not cuter than you” He scrunched his nose cutely and stared fondly at you while you cleaned the rest of his body.

“I went with blue I hope that’s okay with you” You came into the living room with a silky blue blazer paired with a black skirt and black heels.

His jaw was literally on the floor, and maybe your mind was playing tricks on you, but you could have sworn you saw a bit of drool at the corners of his lips. “Blue is more than okay. My girl looks so good. Come here” He stood up and walked around you in circles, looking at every inch of you. “Perfect,” he used the only word that could describe how you looked right now. “Let’s hurry up so I can get my suit. We only have…” he looked at his wrist watch “forty-five minutes.”

“Okay,” you pecked his lips. “We have to bring some of your suits for the next time you sleep over.”

“Next time?” He asked with a smile.

“Yeah, next time,” you smiled and hooked your arm around his. “Let’s go.”

“Let’s” he returned your smile and walked to the front door.

Panties wet, folds soaked, heart beating, pussy throbbing, mouth watering.

Lee heeseung.

He wore black slacks, a navy blue shirt that almost looked like silk matching your blazer perfectly, a black and navy checkered tie, and wet messy hair.

You thought you must be dreaming cause he looked too good to be real.

He attempted to fix his hair in the mirror. “It’s too bad I don’t have time to style my hair” He flicked a few pieces out of his eyes.

“Don’t!” You said, startling him from practically screaming. “Your hair looks good like that.”

“Does it?” He looked at you quizzically.

“Yes, I hate to say this out loud, but you look so fuckable right now.” You said while practically drooling at the sight of him.

“Do I?” He asked while biting his lip. “You want to fuck me right now?” He walked over to you, pressing you up against his front door, resting his palms on your plump ass.

“So bad,” you admit shamelessly.

“Is that so?“ he quirked his slit eyebrow.

“Very much so,” you say as you wrap your hands around his neck and stare at his lips.

“Too bad we’re running late,” he said with no stock behind his words as he inched his face closer to yours and slid his hand up your skirt squeezing your ass roughly. “Kiss me”

Let’s just say you both made it to work with a minute to spare after a very, very heated make-out session against his front door.

“Coffee, ms y/n” He set your coffee on your desk like usual.

“You little shit,” you glared at him.

“I just brought you coffee. Calm down” He puts his hands up in defense as if he was really just innocently bringing you coffee.

“Get the fuck out of here,” you say, annoyed. Literally, nothing has changed since you two confessed to each other, but you weren’t complaining. You loved the dynamic between the both of you and so did he.

“Okay, but first, don’t we look so good together?” He lowered his face next to yours while adjusting his tie, and checking you out in your desk mirror.

“We look great together. Now get to work” You hid your blushing face and lightly pushed him away from you.

“Kiss kiss,” he puckered his lips out for you to kiss like you hadn’t done it at his place, the car, and the parking lot before coming in.

“Mwah, now go before we get caught,” you patted his butt.

“Yes, boss, or soon to be,” he finally went to his cubical and stopped pestering you.

Not even a minute later, he was bothering you yet again by knocking on the thin wall separating you both. “We should go on a date later,” he whispered.

“Okay,” you reply back just as quietly.

“Where do you want to go?” He asks.

“Anywhere” All that could be heard was fast typing and you both whispering.

“How about the place that opened right down the street from here?” He asked in a hushed voice.

“Sure,” you whisper back.

“And then later, when we go home, if you want to, we can have sex,” he suggested.

You had to bite your lip to hold back your smile. You loved this idiot so much.

“Y/n?” He paused his typing for a quick second so he could hear your reply.

“Yes?” You said, doing a poor job of hiding your excited giggles.

“And then we can have sex after if you’re down. Are you down?” He repeated his question while resuming his typing.

“I’m down,” he blushed, getting all giddy at the idea of spending the whole day and night with you.

“Cool,” Of course, he’d reply with Cool. That response was just like him.

Approximately five minutes passed by before he spoke again. “Hey, y/n?” He says softly.

“Yes, seungie?” He smiles at your sweet tone while answering him.

“I love you” He passed you another heart-shaped origami over your cubical.

You stopped when you saw it on your desk. He paused everything he was doing and smiled on the other end, just waiting to hear you say it back.

Your heart melted as you imagined how cute he was while concentrating on making it for you. You could already see his cute little focused eyes and pouty lips. “I love you too.” Silenced ensued while you both got busy with work once again, but the smiles never left either of your faces for the rest of the day.

And that’s the story of how you got together with your cubicle crush.

thanks for reading! I hope you all enjoy it. Please leave feedback and reblog.

Permanent taglist:®• @hello-stranger24 @ashxsmoon @lhsggg @scarlet127 @bunhoons @axartia @kpopscruggles @badidealy @heeseungleeworld @jayroseyy @bangchanhasbigfeet @duolingofanaccount @oceanyocean @hee-in @heesgirl @bambisgirl @heeaddict @heartandfangs @nyxtwixx @iamliacamila

cubical crush taglist: @ara-15 @heeswif3y @positivelyinlovewithjungwon @seokseokjinkim @dneltrise

#heeseung #lee heeseung #lee heeseung smut #enhypen smut #enhypen #enhypen fluff #enhypen fanfiction #enhypen heeseung #engene #heeseung fluff

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the-red-thread-that-strangles · 1 month

Text

Akai is a study in severed connections.

He probably got off to a better start than Rei, by being born into a loving family. But it then hits all the harder that Tsutomu takes that case and disappears. Their mother hardens in an effort to protect what remains of their family, and Akai leaves his family behind to chase a ghost. I wonder which is worse; never having known kindness, or knowing it and having it ripped away from you?

We know barely anything about these next couple of years, aside from the fact that he was alone in the US. Who knows how far back the lone wolf monicker reaches? It’s not like we know anyone he’s been particularly close to until Jodie, and that’s what, several years down the line? I wonder what was up with that, how that relationship came about. It can’t have been that deep, considering how easily he broke up with her for Akemi. Did he ever even love her, or was he seeking physical comfort? Was it the adrenaline in a high-stakes job that brought them together? Who knows.

By contrast, Akemi’s kindness is certainly a draw for Akai. She is vulnerable herself, but keeps acting tough (and isn't that familiar). Kind and soft despite the world she lives in that she gets to him, against his better judgement. She cares for him, and allows him to care for her in return. And then Scotch dies, another potential connection severed, and his cover is blown. He leaves his love behind, returns to the US, and is alone. Again.

By the time canon rolls around, he and Akemi have been separated for what, three years? Akai is supposed to be dependable all the time, and he is, but at the cost of running himself ragged. He’s subsisting on caffeine and nicotine, shit at taking care of himself. He still loves Akemi, and is probably faithful to her. How long has it been since somebody has touched him? Held him? Cared for him? Years, at this point. She asks him to date her for real, and is ripped away from him immediately after. He’s on the other side of the globe, and she’s dead. Another connection, severed.

Things go from bad to worse, and Akai Shuichi dies. Now cut off in all but the slightest thread, he’s officially separated from the people he cares about. They mourn his death, and he can do nothing but watch and stay away to keep them safe.

Even if he wasn’t a special agent in the process of taking down a criminal syndicate, he’s now living a lie as Okiya Subaru, one he can’t involve anyone else in. Okiya is sociable, but the relationships can’t be genuine, and I think that’s worse. Seeing how happy people are with their connections, Masumi trying to reach out to him too, and he can’t. It’s too dangerous. He’s too dangerous. By this point, he’s probably resigned himself to mourning and loneliness.

And then there is Rei. Who is holding onto their bond in desperation, like a lifeline. It should be severed, but Rei keeps it alive through force of will. He has faith that Akai can’t have died that easily. Their connection a thread of guilt that strangles them both. But it also keeps them together. Neither can escape it.

And Akai starts to thrive under Rei’s attention. Because he’s seen, and Rei keeps seeking him out, despite everything. Whatever he gives, Akai gladly takes – whether it be violence or love. His touch burns, either way. Fistfights turn into sparring turn into wound care.

Once they’ve started, they can’t seem to stop touching, finding excuses despite their better judgement. He’s bad at communicating, and Rei is a habitual liar, but their actions speak louder. When everything threatens to fall apart, they’re bound, holding onto each other, holding each other.

Has Akai ever had anyone he could rely on, before? An equal he didn’t need to protect (who in fact objects to it)? Who can take care of themselves? Who won’t die so easily, leaving him alone yet again? In between all this loss and misery, Rei’s unshakable faith and competence provide solace. His care is wild and sometimes violent, but unmistakably there. Akai gives back what he can.

And maybe, just maybe, that connection is strong enough to support the tension. It persists despite all the troubles they’ve gone through. And with time, and a gentle touch, maybe they can remove the thread from each other’s necks. Maybe they can breathe freely, in the end.

#akam #iris writes things #long post #akai shuichi #character study #dcmk #in conclusion: they're touch-starved your honour

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monsterloverwriting · 7 months

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Hey bae if ur reqs are open cause u pls make a part 3 to that demon x reader (demon-visitor) fic u wrote😩😩like what happens after they're binded together

Hello my friend! I am genuinely more than happy to add to this story and I am actually thinking of turning into a full length novel should the want for it arise! I have a lot of ideas for them. In the mean time!

Concept Part 1

Mine

Fem!reader/M!demon, slight mind altering, claiming, MDNI

The week had been long for you. Long and trying as you did your best to make sense of what had happened to you. You tried briefly to forget it, act as if it had been all a nonsensical dream made of some deep desire you weren't consciously aware of. That quickly became impossible as you now had to attempt to hide the two very large bite marks on either side of your neck. Thankfully no one really questioned why silk scarves suddenly became a staple of your summer wardrobe. Part of you hoped they would fade away to nothing, another slightly stronger part wanted them to stay just as they were so you could never forget that night no matter how hard you tried.

Not that you were really trying to forget, the image of the demon littered your mind at every moment, invaded your dreams and often had you waking up needy and wanting to be able to feel his hot skin again. You were constantly reminded how good that night felt to the point that it was almost distracting you from the day to day. Often you would find yourself ripped from the day dream of finding Zed in your small living room just waiting for you to get home, only to be reminded you were at work and most definitely was supposed to reply to that customer with something other than a dizzy nod. It got to the point that your boss convinced himself you were sick and sent you home early on Friday for a long weekend so you could "recoup in peace".

It ended up not being nearly as peaceful as anyone would have thought.

You noticed the smell first, a sickly sweet almost burnt smell that made a bubble of anxiety build in your chest. There was no way you left a candle burning all day was there? You didn't even remember lighting one that morning. You've been so scatter brained lately that that barely mattered anymore. The anxiety quickly reformed when you heard a small crash, glass shattering and a low hum of disapproval.

Before you could even reach for your phone the large, all too familiar figure appeared before you, his height and muscular frame taking up the archway as he gripped the top leaning toward you.

"Welcome home sweet thing."

His smirk was devious as he stretched his arm holding the top of the arch to lean closer to you, his free hand reaching out to gently run one claw tipped finger from the top of your scarf to just under your chin forcing you to look up at him. His eyes searched your face before they fell to the scarf wrapped around your neck. Tutting softly his claw slid down your throat catching the edge of the smooth silk before gently pulling it away from your throat, a wide toothy grin forming as he revealed the marks he'd left on you.

"Hiding my marks? Oh sweet thing you should know better. How is anyone going to be able to tell your mine?" When he said it his voice was so smooth it nearly puts you into a trance. His gaze looking down on you was hungry as he glanced at the marks. Thinking better of yourself. You took a step back away from him trying to gain some distance in the hopes that it would help you clear your mind. It didn't really, but there was only so much you could do when there was an 8 ft tall demon standing in your foyer wearing very little clothes he didn't advance as you stepped back. He simply watched you. He let the silk scarf fall between you. Almost acting as if he was disgusted with it. He did, however, watch you closely.

" I'm not sure what is happening actually. I don't I don't belong to you. I don't belong to anyone. I am a person and you do not get to decide that I belong to you after we have sex once. That's not how it works." You said almost frantically as you saw the grin quickly return to his face, he leaned closer once again his hand reaching out fingers twirling in your hair before he brought it up to his nose taking a deep inhale.

"Oh so once was the issue now I can fix that very easily. Sweet thing. Why don't you tell me exactly what you would want me to do to you and I will make that wish come true to my utmost pleasure."

It was like his presence was intoxicating a very small part of you wanted to tell this demon to get out. Leave your house but there were so many other parts of you screaming to let him do the most unholy things you could possibly imagine. And all of you was absolutely certain that he would get just as much pleasure out of this as you would because you were sure it wouldn't simply stop at him pleasing you. You shook your head resolving yourself for at least this one time to think it through before you decided to fuck the demon.

That could happen later.

"No I want you to explain what you're doing in my house. How you even got here? How you knew where I was and why, why are these still here like this? It's been a week and they haven't healed at all." Bracing yourself against the wall you looked up at him all of your resolve showing clearly as you demanded answers. He seemed to find this amusing and pushed off the door stepping toward you, pinning you to the wall between two strong muscular arms.

" I'm here because I marked you. I marked you because I want you. I want you because you're mine and those will remain there for as long as you are mine. Sweet thing, you're my mate now and you are going to be stuck with me for a very long time." His gravel voice was almost a hum as he leaned down close, his forked tongue flicking out to lick at one of the bites causing your knees to go weak.

You were fucked, in more ways than one.

#monster fucker #monster lover #writing #mdni #monster smut #monster romance #monster boyfriend #asked & answered #anon asks

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marvelous-slut · 2 years

Text

Miss Me - Happy Lowman x reader

Warnings: 18+, minors DNI, unprotected sex, oral (male receiving)

Have I ever said how much I love this man?

“Jackie boy, we have trouble.” Chibs blurts out, seeing you hop out of your car, slamming the door shut in rage. Jax makes his way over to the window at TM to see you.

“Shit.” He lets out, running a hand through his hair. “I’ll handle this.” He states, walking toward the door. He opens it for you in hopes of calming you down. You rip the sunglasses from your eyes and throw them in your back, crossing your arms.

“Where is Happy?” You hadn’t heard from him in almost a day in a half, you knew he would have to be sniffing out pussy at Diosa or with the MC. Jax took a deep breath, thinking of how to word this just right.

“He’s away, doing some work with the Chinese.” You laugh in his face, shaking your head in furry.

“Jax, that’s bull shit and I know it. That man texts me constantly, even when he’s with you shit heads. Usually junk pictures, really missing my daily pick me up.” Jax mutters out a ‘shit’ as Chibs and Tig stand by.

“I mean, I can send you some of mine to make up for that.” Tig lets out, trying to calm the situation down.

“Sweet offer Tiggy, but we know you don’t hold up to that standard.” Tig immediately takes offense, but can’t say anything before Jax lets out the truth.

“Okay look, the Chinese took Hap for collateral with the Irish. He’s fine, I’m handling this. Happy can handle himself, don’t need his old lady doing it for him.” You laugh, holding back every urge inside of you to slap Jax right across his stupid, pretty boy face.

“Jax, let me tell you something. Happy better make it back in one piece or I swear to God, someone is going to get hurt.” You turn away and head straight to your car, giving a wave to Chucky before you slam the door shut. Jax kicks dirt that covers the floor.

“Jackie boy, we have to get Happy back, if his ole lady is as crazy as him the Irish are the least of our concerns.” Tig nods in agreement.

“Is it bad that I’m scared and a bit turned on at the same time?” Tig questions himself, Chibs shakes his head muttering as he leaves the room, Jax gives him a look that could kill.

“What did I say wrong?” Tig asks as Jax walks away to regather his plans.

•••••••••••••••

Two days pass since you had let Jax have an earful of your thoughts. You couldn’t help but think about Happy, even more now that you knew he was in danger with the Chinese. You laid down on your bed, the same bed that Happy had fucked you stupid in many times, but also the same bed he made love to you in. You think about these moments, deciding to attempt to take your mind off him being in danger. You sit up, reaching to your bed side table and grabbing your black vibrator and laying back down, making sure you were comfortable. You lift the over sized shirt that was Happys up and slide the toy down to your went cunt, making sure it was on the highest setting. You let out a moan, running it up and down your slit.

“I’m out here in danger and you’re in here putting on a show.” You hear a familiar voice that makes you immediately jump out of bed. Happy stands in the door way, grin plastered on his face. You were entirely sure if it was from the sight he had walked in on or maybe he genuinely was glad to see you, or both. Either way you ran to his arms, planting your lips on his kissing him like you’d never see him again. He drops his bag, running a hand down to your ass, grabbing it roughly. He pulls away breaking the kids and places a hand on the side of your face.

“I missed you baby, I see you missed me too.” He motions to the black vibrator on the bed, you smirk and run your hands to his belt buckle, immediately undoing it.

“Doesn’t do the job like you do.” Happy pulls his shirt over his head and then moves to his pants, throwing them across the room. You discard the shirt you wore and got on your knees, giving him no chance to say anything else or think anything else. You take his hard cock, stroking him slowly before sliding your mouth onto him slowly. He picks up the pace and you’re doing everything in you not to gag on him, taking every inch of him in your mouth. Before you know it he pulls his cock out of your mouth, helps you to your feet and lays you back on the bed. He spreads your legs, sliding two fingers in your wet cunt and starts to finger fuck you. You let out a moan, grinding yourself on him.

“Happy baby.” You let out softly, he continues doing his work, but this time making eye contact with you, making sure he saw what he was doing to you. “I missed this.” He smirks, deciding he wanted to feel you around his cock. He pulls his fingers out, licking them, tasting your juices. He lines himself up with your entrance, slamming himself inside making you gasp.

“I missed this too. I missed this tight pussy, all mine.” He whispers before attacking your neck.

His thrusts are deep and passionate, making you let out ungodly noises. He runs a hand to your nipple, rubbing it between his index and thumb, once he is done he runs the hand to your throat wrapping it around softly. “You really thought that toy could do the job like I do?” He questions, wiping the beads of sweat from his forehead.

“Happy, nothing makes me feel as good as you do.” You weren’t lying either, no toy or man could make you feel like he did. Nothing compared to having him inside of you, stretching you out or fucking you how he did. You feel yourself closer to an orgasm and he can see it, picking up his pace, slamming into you. He makes you hold eye contact.

“Come on girl, I wanna see you come undone.” The words send you over the edge, you let out a moan and a few ‘oh my gods’, it’s not long he feels himself closer to the edge. He loved seeing what he did to you, loved seeing the way your eyes went dark as you came all over him, he loved feeling your cunt tighten around him when you came. He loved it all. He goes to pull out of you when he feels himself dangerously close to orgasm, you wrap your legs around him forcing him to stay put.

“Don’t do that,” you let out slowly, nails digging into his back. “I want to feel all of you.” He doesn’t need anymore assurance and he releases into you, filling you with himself. Once he’s done, he pulls out and lays on the bed beside of you. You sit up, taking a glance over at him and he smiles.

“Heard you were going to kick Jax’s ass if I didn’t make it back.” You smirk, running a hand up and down his tattooed chest. “Is that cause you’d miss this too much, or you’d miss me?” He asks, you shake your head, standing up to go clean up.

“Guess you’ll never know.” You reply before leaving the room, leaving him wondering what the two of you really were.

#happy lowman soa #happy lowman x reader #happy lowman #happy lowman smut #sons of anarchy x reader #sons of anarchy smut #sons of anarchy #happy lowman x you

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devnmon · 3 months

Text

save who you can save // t.s.

A prequel to Long Long Time, detailing the first time the two met.

pairing: smuggler!reader x tess servopolous slowburn

Summary: One of your smuggling deals goes wrong– almost deathly wrong. A stranger decides you're worth saving.

word count: 12k

warnings: descriptions of several injuries, reader gets beaten up, non-sexual nudity, tw for random guys in the qz, physical assault, mentions of blood, death, drugs, and typical tlouverse violence... reader is mid 20's, tess is early 40's, tess gives reader stitches (but it's ok they're unconscious), mentions of tess's past, tess and joel aren't a thing in this, but he is an asshole for the better part of the fic [lowkey enemies to friends w/ joel]. pining (a lot of mutual pining oh my god guys.) also pls don't come at me for inaccurate qz stuff, this is fanfic. nonbinary pronouns used the reader is afab! also this fic starts in readers pov and ends in tess's and i just realized that so don't hate me for it! xx

a/n: happy valentines day GAY PEOPLE. this is for you guys. and all the tess fic lovers. here is my prequel of Long Long Time that i wrote a little over a year ago when tlou hbo came out. i pour my heart into each and every fic i write. this is my child, be kind with her. i hope you all enjoy and don't forget to reblog to support your favorite creators!!

That day she found you, beaten and bloody with several injuries, was the day she had quite genuinely saved your life.

You never should’ve made this deal.

Becoming a smuggler required more skill, more cunning –more than you had. Somehow, you’ve ended up right where you never thought you’d be: on the sour end of an unstable client.

You knew your stock wasn’t as satisfying as the client demanded, but the amount of ration cards seemed too good to be true. It happened to be– regrettably you’d been a fool to try and weasel out of the deal without repercussions. Nothing was ever that easy in this world.

The first thing you felt was the end of a very sharp knife pressing into your back. Then you heard his voice in your ear, speaking punctually.

“Where do you think you’re going? Nobody gets past me. Not even you. I let you think you’re good at sneaking around. But I see everything.”

Your breath hitched as his grip pulled you backwards into the alley. Once you turned away from the main road, you were met with another man, one you knew accompanied another man you dealt with often. He was dressed the same, and had that classic sketchy-guy look that told you exactly who’d approached you this hostile.

It was a particularly unstable client, one you hesitated to continue business with due to his poor self-control. He was a junkie through and through, just a man too weak to settle into this world, needing a constant escape. You had unfortunately promised him a supply you didn’t have, and things escalated too far soon after.

There was no reason to call for help either; it would be that easy for him to rat you out to FEDRA for selling pills. Even if those same soldiers were frequent customers of yours. Your voice had gone hoarse and the cut on your lip swelled enough to make it hard to speak.

You couldn’t decide what was worse, the fact that you never saw this coming, or that nobody would be coming to your rescue.

Crack.

Your shoulder was slammed into the wall with enough force that you toppled to the floor. Followed by multiple kicks to the stomach and sides, with not even a second’s notice. Your lunch felt closer to coming up with every rough kick of their boots into your torso.

The amount of stock wasn’t nearly as close to what the client demanded, but his ration cards seemed too good to be true. To be fair, you weren’t cut out to be a smuggler; you were a fool to try and weasel out of the deal without repercussions. It was never that easy in this world.

Your knuckles scraped against the blacktop like sandpaper while attempting to stand, painted crimson while your skin ripped. When your vision went double, then triple, squeezing your eyes shut alleviated the pain for just a moment.

Other than the blood you felt gushing from your hands, the throbbing in your head and torso made it difficult to move without immense pain. Weakened by several blows to the stomach, your legs finally gave out. Your ankle twisted the wrong way as you fell, while your palm caught on a sharp piece of rock, scraping it enough to burn. You were damned if you tried to yell for help.

You huff a breath, before a sharp pain stopped you short, coughing up blood that pooled in your chest. On all fours like a dog you were, with the two men standing above you muttering to themselves.

Mercy, they called this having mercy on you.

Some form of laceration cut deep enough to drip red hot blood down your forehead, and there was no doubt you had several more covering your body by the way everything burned. It dripped down your face and made everything blurry.

Coughing hoarsely, you somehow found the strength to pull yourself off from the prone position, finding a wall to sit up against. Each time you moved, it felt as if your body was getting ripped apart. Your bones felt like glass, your skin like paper. Blood gushed from a slash on your arm, and your stomach had taken one too many blows to pull yourself to your feet.

How the fuck did this happen?

You had been traveling through the QZ during late afternoon, around the central hob of trading. In the midst of the zone's chaos, you ducked into an alley as a shortcut, which was your first mistake. Minutes later, you had been roughly attacked from behind, and thrown against the wall with one motion.

“You got our pills, bitch?” Two sets of feet pointed toward you while weakened.

“I need more time,” you breathed, convincing yourself more so than the man in front of you, “My dealer’s stingy with his supply. I can get it out of him, though. Soon.” Your arms raised at your sides, knowing how many people secretly carried knives around the QZ. There was no way you were taking that chance.

A pair of hands grabbed the collar of your shirt, lifting you up so you could hear them clearly.

“We want the rest of our pills. And a pack of cigs. End of the day tomorrow. Or you’re all the way dead. You hear me?”

The other man approached, unsheathing his blade and immediately pressed it to your cheek, standing not even a foot from your body. His blade was forced onto your skin so hard that it drew blood, and you called out in pain.

“End of day tomorrow. The usual spot.” The one holding your collar said pointedly.

A fast nod of your head paired with the incessant throbbing of his words within your mind had you struggling to comprehend anything. He released your collar, which resulted in you toppling onto the ground once more. The blood you coughed up afterwards stained your shirt, wiping it away with the sleeve of your flannel.

You’d survived the chaos of outbreak day, almost running yourself into the ground trying to escape everything. That was the day you knew this would be a life of running, until you arrived in Boston.

You weren’t sure about the Quarantine Zone at first. But then you saw a bed and pillow to sleep on every night. No more camouflaging yourself in the backseat of a car or suffering drastic temperatures and hoping you wake up not frozen to death the next day.

To be fair, you tried to sign up for work shifts, but manual labor was never for you– especially not when it was shoveling shit, or transferring corpses to burn in fire pits. That kind of work was not how you intended to live out the rest of your life.

That was when you landed on smuggling, since people had to be desperate for some kind of relief after taking orders from soldier douchebags all day. You probably would’ve been better off in the academy, not taking shit from a weasel of a dealer whose name you forgot, but whose ponytail you remembered. You’d gone from risking your life every day in the open world, dodging the swarms of runners underground to being forced into risking your life trying to make the junkies and downright miserable people of the QZ happy.

Now, you’ve accepted that you were going to slowly bleed to death in this alley. Part of you wanted to resist, but the idea of not having to deal with anything like this ever again. It would just be that much easier to close your eyes and succumb.

You whimpered at the pain running through your leg, a patch of maroon seeping through your jeans. Too weak to put pressure on any of your own wounds, you let your eyes close in defeat. The voice at the back of your head protested, wanting you to get up and fight for your life. But you just couldn’t.

Eventually the air got cooler which you noted meant the sun had gone down, and you were in and out of consciousness. Warily, you opened your one good eye, spotting the patch of blood that had spread further from the gash on your leg. The sight made you queasy, so you closed your eye again and went back to unconsciousness for a while. It was the lone way everything stopped hurting, and bliss once you floated into it.

“Psst. You alive?” The words rang sharp in your head with an ache so bad you couldn’t focus. The nudge at your foot woke you a bit, pulling you to consciousness slightly. No reply earned you a slightly harder kick to the leg, which shot another stinging pain up your leg. You groaned and your body moved a bit.

Is someone there?

Footsteps crunched against the blacktop, getting slightly louder.

Fuck, please don’t hurt me, please, please..

“I’m just gonna check your pulse, so if you can hear me, don’t freak out.” Your head moved an inch weakly, unsure about this person being so close to you. A low groan of discomfort came from your chest, alerting the woman you were conscious.

“Hey, hey. I’m not going to hurt you. Just needed to know if you were alive.” The voice was low, and it sounded feminine through the ringing in your ear.

“H-help… me…” You managed to speak, your mouth and tongue tasting like iron.

The woman went silent for a moment, taking a look over the state of your injuries.

“You’re pretty fucked up, honey. God, what piece of shit did this to you?” She picked up on the multiple gashes on your body, staining your clothes, and your shoulder was visibly out of place.

You decided to open your eyes to see who was crouched next to you. It was no use, your vision was still spinning from earlier. Sharp pains drummed against your head and obscured your ability to see. The one sole thing you could make out was someone with long, light colored hair and a dark pink shirt, but you kept looking around to see if your vision would come back.

“Shit. I’ve gotta get you out of here. Just- just hold on. Name’s Tess, what’s yours?” You picked up on her moving about, unzipping what you assumed was her pack.

You mumbled again, still unable to speak clearly.

“Right, dumb question. So, I’ve gotta stop your bleeding, and your shoulder looks dislocated. I can only do one of those things right now, and then we can get you someplace safe. That means I’m gonna have to put pressure on your leg. Okay?” Her words came out matter-of-factly, and she seemed like a true survivor of this world.

You begin to protest, moving slightly away from her and moaning with distrust.

“Look, I promise, I will get you out of here. But I can’t have you leaving a blood trail through the streets. Alright?” She asked, and you hesitated for a moment, but nodded slightly.

“Okay, this is going to hurt, but I need you to keep it quiet so it doesn’t attract soldiers. Can you do that?”

Immediately, you shook your head no, and you heard the woman mumble to herself while she shuffled through her bag.

“Here, bite down on this. It’s a clean rag, and I promise that if you scream, it’ll be a hell of a lot quieter than if you didn’t have it.” She raised the rag up to your lips and waited for you to open your mouth. Somehow you trusted her to let her put it in. If this were some other old injury, you wouldn’t be giving an inch. But you happened to be on the brink of death right now, and you realized she’s probably saving your life.

“I’m gonna put pressure on your cut now.” You heard her rearrange herself to be crouched over on the other side of you. With both her hands, she pressed down firmly on your wound. The stinging pain that died down earlier came right back when her hands made contact. She noticed your wound gushing through the first bandage in her hand. You groaned loudly into the cloth, grateful for its existence.

“I know it hurts…” The woman spoke again, “Just hang in there. I’m gonna wrap your wound, and then once we’re safe, I can stitch it up.”

You begin to protest, borderline trusting the woman in front of you. Then you realized, she was the only one here.

"Look, I need to get you out of here. Need to get us out of here. Soldiers are gonna be swarming the streets all night, and it's almost sundown. I can take you to my place, and I’ll have a better chance to take care of you there. I know you probably don’t trust me, but it's the least I can do."

Considering the current situation, you didn’t have much of a choice.

“Do what you… h-have to..” you muttered weakly.

The pressure on your wound had lightened, while one of her hands rested on it as she used the other to grab for her bag again. She met your eye level for a moment, glancing up to survey your state. She went back to wrap some gauze around your thigh, tying it tighter than you would’ve liked, even though you knew it would help your wound begin to heal.

“Okay, I think the bleeding stopped. You poor thing, let’s get you out of here.” You watched her zip up her pack and shrug it onto her back, while grabbing yours with her other hand.

“It’s probably gonna hurt a lot if you try to stand, but we gotta get you up one way or another.” You felt her at your side, slipping your left arm around her shoulder. She had already noticed the sharp inhales you were taking upon moving from your spot.

“Here, lean on me. I’ll carry you. Just keep breathing, honey.”

The minute she began to lift you was when you knew something was really wrong with your other arm. It tingled all over and your shoulder ached something awful.

“‘M t-tryin’– it hurts…” had been uttered under your breath with another whine of sharp pain as your body moved with hers.

“I know. Shhh, Shh. Hey, Just put one foot in front of the other. You’ve got this.” Something about her voice was calming you, and it almost made up for all the pain. The two of you begin walking, slowly at first, testing out your strength for the journey. It took a minute of tripping over your own feet to steady yourself.

“Promise we’re gonna get you fixed up, brand new.” She muttered under her breath, low enough so other people nearby didn’t hear.

Somehow her words kept you going, limp after limp. Tess made sure you knew when you had to take a step up or down, and kept you going the whole time.

“Yeah, you got it. We’re halfway there. Keep it up, doin’ great.” Her words reverberated in your head with an echo. You couldn’t see where you were stepping for the majority, but you trusted her to guide you. Another few minutes of walking had your body much more worn out than normal. Once she stopped at the side of a building, her arm went to push the door open.

“Here we are.” Tess kicked it shut behind you two, and balanced you against her body. The interior was warm on your skin, but somehow your body still shivered to its core. Inside, you could hear people shifting around, but the sounds blended together amongst your attempt to stay upright.

“I’m s-so cold…”

The strength in your body was draining with every step you took; you were ready to collapse.

“I know, but you gotta keep your eyes open a little longer. We need to get you up these stairs. Then we’re home free.”

You didn’t protest as she brought you closer, inching up each step carefully in order to not strain yourself. Your legs ached with every step, persevering to make it all the way.

The last step up the top stair drained the last of your stamina, evident by the way your fingers throbbed with each beat of your heart. You were out of it more intensely than when you had been outside. Your whole body was sensitive with some form of pain you couldn’t quite pinpoint.

Tess led you down the short hallway, stopping in front of her door. She fumbled with her keys, although the jingling chain sounded more like glass breaking in your head. The door flew open, and she brought you inside, tossing your pack to the side while tossing her keys in another direction.

“Alright, let’s set you down on the couch. Should be more comfortable than the damn ground.” Tess scoffed as she brought you over, keeping an eye on your limp. She turned you to the right, your bad arm on the outside of the couch as you were lowered down onto the cushions. When your feet were finally off the ground and your back rested against the pillows, it made a world of a difference.

“Fuck… I’m so tired. Everything hurts.” You stifled a groan, but Tess saw how much pain you were in. Your eyes scrunched together every time you tried to move and there were multiple patches of blood seeping through your shirt.

“I know. But I can’t leave your shoulder the way it is.”

“My shoulder?” You hadn’t the slightest idea what she was talking about, your arms felt fine.

No, it’s definitely the shock you’re in.

“It’s dislocated. Pretty swollen already, you must be in shock. And I already told you that I’d have to pop it back in. Before we left, you don’t remember?”

“No…” You mumbled, trying to recall; your memory was so groggy; you couldn’t remember half the day.

“Shit, you probably have a concussion too.” Tess reached to the back of her jeans, pulling out the same rag as before. “But I’ve gotta set your shoulder before it’s permanently damaged. It’s probably been way too long already.”

“How d’you know all this? Were you a doctor or something? Before?” Tess turned to face you, and you were able to focus on the features of her face for a moment. Her eyes were a light hazel color, and you could see little strands of grey peeking through her light brown hair.

“Or something… I did a lot to survive after the outbreak. Learned a lot more to survive the hard times.” Her words trailed off, and she went to grab something from another part of the room. Tess had collected an old shirt of hers, and came back over to you.

“Okay, so… I’m not good with pain clearly. Hope you still have that rag. Cause I’m gonna yell… or pass out. Either way, it’s gonna hurt a shit ton, and I’m gonna need it.”

Without a doubt, Tess pulled the rag from her back pocket for you.

“Got it right here. Kept it out of my pack cause I knew you’d need it again. This is gonna hurt a lot more than just some pressure on your cut.” She began tying the t-shirt together in a specific way, but you weren’t sure what she was doing with it.

“Shit. I know… I know. Just do it.” You groaned, feeling a slight tingling sensation in your left hand shooting upwards to your shoulder.

Tess set the now tied shirt onto the floor, as she kneeled down next to you. With one hand, she held the rag up to your mouth, and you bit down on it. Among the various other pains in your body, your shoulder was the worst of all. Taking a few deep breaths to calm yourself enough, Tess met your eye once she had leaned down in front of you.

“Ready?”

Wordlessly, you nodded your head. You were trying to keep calm, but the shock was wearing off and your pain came flooding back. One of Tess’s hands grasped your forearm, though you could barely feel her grip.

“Okay. One, two…”

Crack went your shoulder back into its socket with one swift motion. Just as she thought, you went groaning into the rag once again. Tess took her hands away and grabbed the makeshift sling she had tied together earlier.

“Does that feel better?” She asked, watching you spit out the rag. You took another deep breath in and out, surveying the current feeling in your arm.

“Yeah.” You weren’t sure if you believed it yourself, but for now you decided to. “Pain’s still there, but it definitely feels different. Better than before.”

“Good. Here, you’ve gotta wear your arm in this sling while it heals.” Tess lifted the tied up sling over your head, and it slipped on easily on once she had it situated the right way.

“Could I get those pills now? The idea of any kind of grace from the amount of pain I was just in sounds like a dream.” You tried to laugh, but a cough came up instead.

“Yeah. I’ve got Oxy, Hydro, Morphine…” She trailed off, not even knowing if you knew what she was talking about.

“Honestly, whatever you think will be best. I honestly don’t know anything about dosages very well, and I trust you. Besides, I just wanna knock out for the night. I’m fucking exhausted.” Your words slurred a bit, due to your swollen lip, but Tess heard you well enough.

“Alright, I’ll be right back.”

Instead of trying to keep your eyes open, you shut them again in an attempt to alleviate the pain in your head, but it pounded nonstop. You listened to Tess’s boots on the wooden floor walking around to ground yourself. A couple minutes later, she returned to where you lay on the couch.

You peeked your eyes open, and she’d crouched down with two pills in one hand and a cup of water in the other.

“Got you water to wash it down with, if you want.” Her cupped hand held two of the white pills and you raised your good arm to grab them. Patient as she was, you moved slowly.

There was no indication of any burdensome look on her face, which was odd– no one had ever been this kind to you before. You didn’t know how to feel about it.

Slipping the pills between your lips, you grabbed for the cup of water. It began to slip out of your hand the minute Tess loosened her grip.

“Here, let me. You’re gonna be really weak for a while, so just close your eyes and relax.” She said, to which she brought the cup to your lips with no hesitation.

“Now, while those pills kick in, I’ll see what I can do for your gashes and other injuries. All I want you to focus on is getting some sleep. You’re safe. I promise.” She touched your hand softly, then stood up and walked off to leave you space to rest.

Once you closed your eyes, you felt the exhaustion wash over you, though it finally felt good to rest again. A few minutes passed, and the groggy effect of the pills began to set in. You were out in no time.

In the meantime, Tess darted back and forth gathering supplies to fix you up; she’d sterilized a needle and thread to stitch up your leg, and took the last of her ace bandages out from her pack to use for your ankle. She grabbed the bottle of whiskey on the countertop, and brought what she needed over to you, couchside.

Before Tess took the needle and thread between her fingers, she cut away the area of denim that was ripped from your gash.

“Sorry, kid. I’ll get you some new pants.” To be fair, those jeans of yours were filthy with dirt and muck stains you’d never be able to wash out. Not to mention the blood that spread had well enough to become a large patch. She attempted to wipe up the dried viscera around your cut best she could, dabbing with the alcohol lightly to sanitize it. She’d counted on you being unconscious from the pills to start stitching up your gash. Hands steady, she looped the needle and thread through your cut, pulling it closed with each tie.

Though it wasn’t the most ideal situation for something like this, Tess had the experience. Stitching up cut after cut on the road for god knows how long, trying to keep moving forward, but somehow someone always got hurt. People kept dying, or turning– and that wasn’t even the worst part. Upon making it to Boston, she learned what it was to be calm under situations like this. To become cold. It got the best of her, more often than not; any idea of the old her was lost to dreams of the world before. She never looked back, never slowed down, never took even a moment for herself. Her routine was based strictly around finding the best way to get by in the QZ. The constant eye of FEDRA’s guards and firefly bombings were enough, let alone the mile-long lines for rations that were barely ever in. It was too much to subject herself to being controlled by an invasive military, especially after all she’d done to survive. Each person Tess left behind etched a sliver of her humanity off, chipping away the heartfulness she once carried with pride.

Save who you can save, the last words whispered to her by someone that sacrificed themselves so she could make it to Boston. Everything blurred together sometime after getting admitted into the city; by then, she’d worn down that kind version of herself into the ground. Possibly that same place where she heard those words before. Quickly, she gained a reputation with Joel by her side in the smuggling business of the zone. It paid well– better than hard labor all day for a cruel amount of flimsy ration cards, just to repeat the same thing over the next day. There was a respectable line Tess drew between the things she’d done in the name of survival, and things she strongly disliked doing.

Tess’s time in the QZ had only reinforced that rigid outer shell of hers, confident the softer, weaker person inside her was left behind for good.

She’d almost made it through the day without finding any trouble, but her path through the streets was detoured by FEDRA vehicles and it happened to be the quickest route back to her place. Tess’s steps were quick, aiming to make a b-line straight back.

Then her eyes caught the image of your thoroughly beaten self, and attempted to shut down the itch in the back of her throat she couldn’t quite scratch.

Just keep walking, she’d told herself. But her subconscious knew better. Then those words echoed lightly through her head.

Tess, save who you can save…

“Shit…”

She thought she’d forgotten them all. But time never does. Those poor souls lost to hordes of runners, clickers, stalkers– each one shoved down so deep inside, and the outside shell of her was simple glass.

Keep walking, just keep walking…. No–

She truly tried to keep going, but each step gnawed into her further. Remembrance of the ones she’d lost shattered the glass holding her back, and glued her feet to the ground in place. A quick curse had Tess looking back over her right shoulder, catching a glimpse of your unmoving body. She’d figured if this were a trap, others would’ve already surrounded her.

A deep sigh came from her exhale of a tightly held breath; her heart pounding against the inside of her chest, as if something about to burst. Any second thought of moving further had vanished, her feet pivoting against the concrete, toward the stagnant body lying soundless against the brick wall.

Darkness swallowed every corner of that alley; Tess was fortunate to even have seen you at all.

It wasn’t often she found herself stopping for anyone that needed help, let alone in the QZ. Underneath the swollen and crimson stained injuries, she saw a young individual subdued and unconscious from their injuries. That was the moment she’d called out to you.

Tess shook those pre-Boston nightmares from her mind, putting all of her focus onto fixing up your ankle. With the discoloration of bruises that covered your ankle, it baffled her how you were even able to trek as far as you had gone. Her eyebrows furrowed relentlessly, each one of your injuries more surprising than the last.

“Jesus, kid. What the hell did you get yourself into?” She muttered to herself, before grabbing the roll of bandages from her pack. Tess was so focused on getting your ankle wrapped, that she hadn’t heard the creak of the wooden floor from behind her.

“Tess… what’re you doin’?”

Unbothered by the voice, her hands kept working. Though, she knew she’d woken her roommate from his slumber. Joel Miller hadn’t thought this was what he’d be seeing at almost two in the morning.

“Wrapping an ankle, the hell do you think I’m doing?”

“Tess. who the fuck is this?” By the tone of his voice, she knew he was pissed. She dare not poke the bear this late.

“It’s uh… well, no. I don’t know. They couldn’t speak when I found them.” She’d finished securing the bandage around your ankle, and placed it back down on the couch.

“Do you even know their name?” Joel stepped towards Tess, his brow furrowed.

“Joel… they were lying beat up and bloody in an alley. I wasn’t gonna take the chance and leave them there to die.” She reached for the other pillow on the couch, and placed it delicately for your ankle to rest on.

“Well, did you even check their pack for weapons?”

Tess huffed a breath, and stood up straight, turning to the man.

“I was a little preoccupied making sure they weren’t bleeding out. Besides, they didn’t have any on their body. But if you insist…”

She took the moment now to move towards your pack she’d thrown into a corner earlier, taking out a notebook, some ration cards, and a couple bags of pills.

“What the fuck? Tess, this could be a setup.” Joel muttered, the tone of his voice unsettled by the situation.

“What? No. No fucking way, Joel. I’m telling you, they would’ve died out there if it wasn’t for me.”

“You’ve gotta stop tryin’ to save people that ain’t worth it. That’s how we’re still alive, why we’re here and the dead ain’t.”

“No, I don’t believe you. They’re unconscious and didn’t even see you, by the way. I think you’re fine.” Tess shook her head while she spoke.

“Well, it’s our business that goes to shit if you’re wrong.” Joel spat, beginning to walk back to his door.

“I don’t really give a shit. Not tonight. What I do care about is making sure this person stays alive. I couldn’t care less about distributing pills to junkies.”

She did care about the smuggling, just not as much as she did about keeping you alive for the night.

“Yeah, whatever.”

His door shut and locked, leaving Tess alone with you for the night. She collected herself after that conversation, preparing anything she might need throughout the night to treat you. Just in case.

Her muscles finally relaxed the minute she’d sat down in a chair adjacent to her couch. While she draped a blanket over her legs, Tess took one last look at you, studying your rising chest and calm features.

You’re gonna be alright.

Beams of sunlight painted the walls with a glowing warmth, cast across the older woman’s skin. Morning broke early, waking Tess before either of the habitants that resided in the Boston apartment. She’d always been a light sleeper, despite that it was loud most hours in the walls of the QZ. Living in Detroit her whole life had certainly accustomed her to it.

Her hazel eyes opened against the light, finding themselves staring upwards at the ceiling. Tess had woken up several times throughout the night, which had become a normal occurrence for her. Events from last night flashed through her mind as she rose from her slumber. Her slumped position resulted with an uncomfortable spot in her neck from the chair she’d been in all night. Tess sat up as best she could, grasping the nape of her neck for comfort. No matter how many times she tried to get rid of the pain, nothing relieved her. Defeated by the lack of sleep, she rose from the chair and looked over at you still asleep on the couch.

Rays of sunlight happened to catch right over your face, peeking through the blinds as they awoke you from rest. Yesterday had become a blur quicker than light.

Where am I? What happened to me? It hurts everywhere…

You shifted lightly with a groan, eyes still closed. A headache pinged at the sides of your temples, and you took a sharp breath out of reflex. You weren’t able to move your body freely; exhaustion had drained you enough. Out of the blue, you heard a female voice echoing in your ears. Your one good eye opened, and it took a minute to adjust to the light, along with any blurriness.

“Hey, you with me?” Her voice called out to you, unintelligible at first, but once you focused on the words more, you understood.

“Where… where am I?” You mumbled, attempting to lift yourself up. You didn’t know what was worse; not knowing where you were, or not being able to lift your body normally.

“Don’t try to sit up. You’re safe, but you’re too weak to sit up right now. I saved you last night, patched you up. Remember? My name’s Tess.”

“Not really…” you sighed, accepting your weakened state.

Tess knew it would take more than just one night to gain your trust; she also knew Joel wouldn’t be as patient. She crouched down by the side of the couch where you were, getting closer to make sure you heard her.

“So, I pulled you out of that alley last night, patched you up and kept you safe the past twelve hours. I think that warrants me your name.”

Your eyes glanced over her figure, the image of Tess still fuzzy. Considering all the factors, and the fact that you were still alive, you gave in and told her your name. Tess nodded contently and spoke again.

“Well, you probably have a concussion. But I cleaned and bandaged up everything else I could. Your left arm was dislocated, but I popped it back in last night. That’s why it’s in the sling. Don’t try to move it much, it’ll take a while to heal. As for your ankle, it’s twisted pretty bad. Bruised, too. You’re gonna be off your feet for a while.” Surveying the bumps and bruises you’d received, she set other supplies to the side on the floor.

You glanced down at your body, pulling back the blanket over your legs to find your stained jeans and the stitched up gash, with other bandaging around your ankle.

“You saved me? And bandaged me up?” You speak clearly for the first time, and Tess stopped in her movement.

“Yeah. You’re lucky to be alive. I wasn’t gonna let you die out there.”

“What..” you swallowed, “What happened to me?”

“From the looks of it, you were on the bad side of a shitty deal gone wrong. Like I said, you’re lucky to be alive.” Her tone was calm, and impressive to see in a situation that was anything but.

“You went through my pack?”

“I found you in an alley. Almost dead. Can you blame me?”

“Guess not…” you said, sighing and trying to sit up. With one arm in a sling, you were having trouble moving without anything hurting. The pills were wearing off little by little as time passed.

“Yeah, I wouldn’t do that. You’re gonna be couch bound for a while.”

“What? No way. I need to… I have business and shit I need to get done–”

“Don’t play coy. We know you’re a smuggler.” She shoved her hands in her pockets, pacing in small circles.

“Well, you went through my bag. It doesn’t take a genius to figure that out. Wait, did you say we?”

Before Tess could respond, a gray haired man emerged from behind her, jutting into the conversation.

“You’re real cocky for someone that almost ended up dead from one of your clients. For all I know, this whole thing is a setup for you to rob us, kill us, or somethin’ else. But I ain’t gonna take that chance. Not now, not ever. Are we clear?” His southern accent came out as he spoke, and it wasn’t often you heard a voice like his among the Boston streets. It was intimidating enough; you didn’t trust him.

“Yeah– okay, dude. Jesus, I don’t even know who you are. I didn’t know you guys were smugglers!” your voice strained while you lift your arm to gesture.

“Joel, I was the one that brought them here. Like you said, this is on me. And I’ve got it. Walk it off, Texas.”

The man named Joel walked backwards, dark eyes trained on you until the moment he turned around and left. He shut the front door in haste.

“Is he always that tense?” You ask, taking a deep breath.

“No. It’s not every day I bring anyone back to this apartment. Let alone someone who looked half dead, like yourself. No offense.”

“Yeah… Why did you save me, by the way? You could’ve just left me there. But you didn’t.”

“I told you… I wasn’t going to let you die. I thought you were dead at first, but I took the chance and saved your damn life. Is that what you wanna hear?” Your vision was still a little blurry, but you could focus on the woman’s features much more easily up close. You finally made out the face of your savior, Tess was a woman with light brown hair, longer than her shoulders but not too long. Her eyes were green, and there were lines on her face from time passing. With her stern voice, you wouldn’t know her face would look as calm.

“Well, thank you.” You admitted, half ashamed you even thought about staying there to die in the first place.

“You’re welcome.”

Just as the silence settled, your body became aware of every injury you’d received. A sound of discomfort slipped past your lips, furrowing your eyebrows together.

“Are you in pain? What hurts?” Tess began looking over the stitches she’d done the night before.

With a groan, you replied, “Everything…”

“Alright, I can give you a couple more pills for the pain. Uh wait– do you need to use the bathroom? I assume it’s been a while…”

“Oh, yeah. I think in my near death I’d been.. You know, going without the ability to control it.”

“Right… Well, I can get you a clean pair of clothes, but it won’t do any good if you’re wearing your own body fluids. Do you– would you like a bath?”

Immediately insecure, you realized how filthy you must’ve become, spending most of yesterday soaked in your own blood and urine. Quickly, you nodded while looking down, shame washing over you.

“Okay, Joel’s not gonna be back for a few hours. I can spare you some new clothes and underwear, but your boots I can just clean off later. I’ll re-wrap your injuries after, too. For now, we’ve gotta get you cleaned up.”

She lifted you from the couch dutifully and slung you over her shoulder to head towards the bathroom. Tess recognized your sounds of discomfort, a string of sharp breaths and muffled groans you thought she didn’t hear.

“Almost there. Here we go.” Her hip pushed the door open, sitting you on the chair next to the tub. Once the water was on and flowing, Tess found the right temperature and began filling the tub. She made her way back to you, and began to untie your boots, placing them off to the side. She took off your button down shirt, which revealed more black and blue bruising across your back and shoulder. You hissed a breath as she pulled the sleeve down off your left arm. Before moving further, Tess looked toward you with kind eyes.

“It’s okay. Don’t feel ashamed. It’s just hard now. But you’ll be alright… Can I continue?” Her hand rested on your good shoulder patiently. You nodded silently, realizing the intimacy of the situation and looked down at the floor.

Slowly, cautiously, and gently, she undressed you while the tub filled beside you both. Not only was your body covered in bruises and scrapes, but dried blood and other viscera had caked on a few layers. The bandages from last night were discarded to the side, fresh ones in the other room for when you were clean. She saw your reaction as you entered the water, your face contorted in both pain and pleasure while you sat. The warmth of the liquid against your torso was another level of soothing, flooding your skin with goosebumps and washing off some of the dried blood upon submerging yourself into the tub. Tess grabbed a washcloth and bar of soap, lathering it up before wiping it across your back.

“I don’t know how to thank you. This is…”

“You don’t have to say anything. And you don’t have to thank me. Please– please don’t thank me.” Tess knew this wouldn’t make up for the numerous people she’d left behind– left to die so she could persevere ahead. But all she had to do was goddamn try.

A comfortable silence settled between the two of you, sighing while she kept cleaning off your body. Her hands were soft against your skin, sending shivers up your spine. Though she was doing something as intimate as washing you, it didn’t bother you as much as it would have on any other occasion. She carefully avoided running over your scrapes and other open wounds, yet still washing them lightly with the soap and water. Before long, the water had become a dark brown color from how much had washed off of you. Tess began to drain the tub, keeping the faucet running as it drained.

“Mind if I wash your hair?”

It was just a simple question, but it sparked your anxiety a bit more than when she undressed you earlier.

“Uh.. sure.”

Tess washed out the tub with a bucket while you sat in it. She lathered some shampoo between her palms, rubbing it across your scalp with gentle fingers.

You couldn’t deny, Tess’s hands were calloused and rough, but they felt like heaven against your scalp. Rubbing the pads of her fingers into your head was somehow better than all the times you’d done it yourself. Eyebrows furrowed against the sensation, and you groaned lowly. You somehow alerted Tess, wondering if she’d pressed too firmly on your head.

“What happened? Does it hurt? Sorry if I’m going too hard–”

“No, it’s great. Keep going.” You breathed.

“Okay..” she chuckled a bit before continuing, then used the bucket to wash the rest out from your locks before applying conditioner. One of her hands grabbed the brush on the floor, slowly untangling the mess of knots in your hair. The warm water calmed you like nothing you’d experienced before, at least not since after the world fell. Appreciation flowed through you, and the comfortable silence reinforced that all the more. It was a safe feeling, one you shared with this kind, and beautiful woman. She’d washed the leftover soap and conditioner off your body, and began to towel dry your skin in a gentle manner.

“Here, wrap yourself in this. I’ll be right back with the clothes.” Quick footsteps brought her to the pile of clothes she’d attained over the months on the run. She’d returned to the bathroom with a few things in hand, and approached you. Carefully, she stood you from the tub and stepped back onto the floor while wiping the remaining water droplets off your back.

“Thanks..” you shivered a bit against the cold air, wanting to be clothed and back under the thick blanket. The socks she slipped over your feet helped warm you, while carefully slipping on the rest of her clothes. Tess even brought a spare sports bra for you to borrow for the time being. Something about the way she moved so calmly, spoke with such a soothing voice that made this whole situation seem lighter. On any other day, you’d be stressing about finding the right pills for a client or risking your life outside the walls. Her soft movements sparked something inside you with a new kind of warmth, and it almost atoned for everything you’d been through the past 12 hours.

Once you were dressed, Tess towel dried your hair and began to tie up another sling for your arm.

“When you’re back on the couch, I’m gonna put some ice on your ankle. It’ll help with the swelling and probably some of the pain.” You nodded silently, taken back constantly by her kindness.

“If you’re in pain, I could give you another dose of pain meds. But it depends on if you want to eat something beforehand. It’s been since yesterday since you ate anything, probably for the both of us. I can fix you something to eat, though.”

“Oh, uh, sure.” You weren’t completely sure what you were doing here still, your mind foggy from the night before. The way your injuries burned and ached against one another had you aching for some kind of relief– any kind at this point. How you got yourself here, you weren’t sure of either.

Not much later, Tess came over with something suitable for you to eat, before giving you a couple more pills for the pain. Again you fell drowsy from the pain medication, resting the day away. With you resting calmly on the couch, Tess did her best to stay awake until Joel returned, running on less than five hours of sleep. It felt like ages before he came through the apartment door once again.

“Hey, can you… keep an eye on them, please… I barely got any shuteye last night.”

“I just got back–”

“Joel, please.”

“Fine.”

“Don’t hurt them, Miller. Seriously. Or I’ll hurt you.” She mumbled under her breath, trudging to the door.

“I’ve got it. Just go.”

With that, Tess collapsed on her mattress, not even bothering to pull the sheet over her, before drifting off to sleep the minute her eyelids fluttered shut.

On the couch, you woke to a silent morning; no movement could be heard amongst the apartment. Your eyelids fluttered open, turning your head to look for Tess; instead you were met with the dark eyes of Joel Miller. His figure sat across from you, adjusting the gun in his hand so you could see it well.

“You try anything funny, you get a bullet.” Joel raised his hand to gesture with the weapon. He noticed the bags under your eyes were dark and sunken in, making you appear more dead than alive at the moment, despite all the bandages.

“You wouldn’t shoot me here. It’d be too loud and soldiers would be here quicker than light.” You rasped, coughing lightly from your dry throat.

“Wanna bet?” He leaned in with a menacing glare. You kept eye contact with him as he began to stand, the intimidation not making a dent in you. It was enough to make Joel second guess his opinion of you for a moment.

“Joel, stand down.” Tess called from the other side of the room. You called her name from the couch, and she quickly replied.

“I’m here. Do you need anything?” She came into eyesight now, her hair pulled back in a ponytail and casually wearing a sweatshirt. Tess gave Joel a look, motioning for him to leave the room.

“Yeah. I need to get out of here and home.” Your eyes watched the older man get up, watching as Tess approached, “My client’s probably freaking the fuck out and wreaking havoc across the QZ looking for me.”

“About that…” She strolled over to where you were, taking a seat, “You need to tell me who did this to you.”

“What? N-No… I can’t. He’s my client. I can deal with him.” You shot up in your seat, groaning slightly.

“Oh right. Like that worked out so well last time?” Joel spoke, walking away. Your eyebrows furrowed in annoyance at what Tess was suggesting.

“Trust me, kid. You’ll thank me later.” She added.

“I’m already thanking you later. I’ll probably be owing you for the rest of my life.”

“No, kid–”

“Don’t call me kid. I’m grown. I can take care of myself.”

“Okay, you’re gonna have to prove it, then. You still need time to heal.” Tess insisted you lay down again, but her words flew in one ear and out the other.

“I need to not be couch bound and sleeping through the day! I need to have a life, some kind of life in this shit hole of a city! Don’t you get it?” Your voice was rising, straining against the irritation.

“I do, trust me. I do. It’s why we got into that business, too. But hun, you didn’t deserve what happened to you. I hope you know that. Now, I’d like to know…” She leaned in closer, lowering her voice to look you in the eye.

“Let it go. It doesn’t matter!”

“Yes it does. Who did this to you?” Her voice spoke pointedly, holding strong eye contact with you. Your eyes closed for a second, throwing your head back with a sigh.

“His info is on the third page in my notebook. You’ll know it’s him cause his orders take up almost the whole fucking page.” You pinched the bridge of your nose as Tess stepped toward your pack, rummaging through it until she found the notepad. Pocketing it, she walked over to Joel’s door, ajar, and spoke.

“Texas, make our guest something to eat. I have some business to attend to.” She turned toward the door, exiting the apartment with your notebook in hand.

“Wait, Tess!”

Your voice fell on deaf ears; she was already down the hallway and gone. Once the man emerged from his bedroom, you shared a plain look as he made his way to the kitchen. Before reaching for the cupboard doors, he grabbed the bottle of amber liquor and poured some into a glass.

“Pour me a glass of that, please.”

“Are you even old enough?”

“Are you kidding? I’m 25. Now can you pour me a damn drink already?”

Silently, Joel rolled his eyes and poured some into a glass for you. It was his peace offering before he went back to find something for you to eat. You ended up sharing some soup and crackers with Joel for dinner, awaiting the older woman’s return afterwards.

An hour or two passed before Tess made her way back. You were resting on the couch when the door opened. She took a sharp breath in upon entering, and let the door slam behind her louder than usual. It gained your attention and Joel’s, looking toward the door. You heard her hiss a breath, while she shook out her fist.

“Shit, Tess. What did you do?” She walked further into the apartment, the light glimmering against the fresh blood across her lip.

“Took care of that client of yours.” She muffled a groan, stretching out her fist while her knuckles bled.

“Did you kill him? The fuck–” You began to try and stand on your good foot, but stumbled before you could get any closer to her.

“What? No, I didn’t kill him. Just taught him a lesson. That smug fucker. I don’t know why you did business with him. He’s a bad junkie. You never do business with a bad junkie.” She sat down near you again, noticing the empty whiskey glass nearby on the floor.

“He was my most frequent customer. Shady as hell, if I’m honest, he kinda scared me. That’s how I knew it was him when I got attacked.

“That’s naïve of you. Why would you ever do something that risky by yourself?”

“I… didn’t have anyone else who was willing to risk their lives sneaking around the QZ. So I said fuck it.”

“Well, I still think you’re a dumbass. You’re just lucky you’re staying out of the smuggling market for a while.”

“No, I told you I can’t. I need to–”

“You need to rest and heal. I swear to god, if I hear one more word about you getting on your feet before you’re a hundred percent, I swear I’ll chain you to the couch.”

“Jesus, fine. I won’t go back out there. Throw my entire business away just to wait till these injuries kill me in the middle of the night, I guess.”

“Hey, you’re gonna be fine. The only reason I’m being an asshole about this is because I want you to survive. I didn’t pull you off the street to let you go back to that shitty situation.” Her words were honest, even if you didn’t believe them.

“Well, thanks. I guess.”

“Yeah, don’t mention it.” She shrugged your thanks off and went about her business.

The future weeks proved to be the longest haul you thought you’d ever been in. It consisted of a lot of reading, sleeping, and wishing you could be on your feet. You ended up asking Tess to take a trip to your place and retrieve some of your things; you were tired of having to put her out of her own clothes to wear. Plus it would just be more comfortable for you. Tess checked your injuries daily, reapplying bandages and cleaning on a steady schedule. She would not let you die from infections after doing all she could to save your life that night.

The two older individuals went about their days more regularly once you were out of the woods with all of your injuries. Tess helped you to and from the table so you could join them for meals, otherwise spending the day rereading old books and magazines while trying to find other things to do than just sit around and rot. You were grateful for Tess saving your life, but this healing process was a bitch.

Standing wasn’t as easy as you thought it would be, especially having been off your feet for days on end. Much less the blood loss you’d experienced, it was humbling to not be able to get around on your own. Slowly as the first week passed, Tess helped you get back on your feet bit by bit. You had enough strength after another week to stand on your own.

One day, the smuggling duo was planning a run while surveying a map they’d drawn up. You nonchalantly watched, sitting in a chair neary. They hadn’t noticed you, until you mentioned a route they hadn’t heard of, and her attention turned to you, impressed with your knowledge and jotted the trail down for later.

“Wait, question. Do you guys know Robert?” Your arms crossed over your chest.

Both Joel and Tess turned towards you now, their eyes widened and faces grim.

“Why?” Joel asked with a stern voice.

“He’s one of the guys that uses that route. At least, his guys do. So be careful.”

“You’re telling me you used to run with Robert?”

“Only for a little. Seemed like he wanted more than just business… with me. But I got out of there before it was too late.” Tess scoffed, a smirk forming on her face.

“Tell you what. You wanna keep smuggling, you join us when you’re fully healed.”

Joel turned to her, but she shot him a look and turned back to the map silently.

“You’re sure?” You asked, sitting up.

“I’m sure. Not gonna let you put yourself in danger again when you could have us at your side.” She looked back down at the map and continued jotting in her notes.

“Okay, cool.” You smiled to yourself, thinking Tess didn’t see, but she glanced up for a moment after she heard your words. She noticed the eagerness in your eyes and felt her heart skip a beat.

So, it wasn’t all for nothing, you thought.

You weren’t given a second chance to live just to lose what got you through the days and weeks on your own. This gave you another opportunity to survive with individuals by your side; you wouldn’t be alone anymore.

Caring came far too easy for Tess. She'd seem cold on the outside, and sure, she was a reserved person. But to see you so overjoyed about being able to continue smuggling, she couldn’t help but have a little warm feeling in her chest.

She thought the first time would be the only time a spark would flicker inside her. But then you were laughing at something idiotic one night, and she felt it again. The tensions between you and Joel had broken– finally. For the first time in a while, Tess saw multiple things looking up: you were recovering on a steady pace, and on an even better note, becoming a friend to her. She read you books, mostly classics from what she’d traded for. Ultimately grateful, you listened intently to every word she read, while trying to not fall asleep from her soothing voice.

Under all the scratches and bruises, Tess saw your kindness and personality reveal with everyday that passed. She became privy to the way you saw the world with a gentle hand, reinforcing that spark in her chest. Yet that same spark came with guilt; she knew it wasn’t fair to fall for you after all you’d been through. She wasn’t sure if you’d ever trust someone like that again. So that spark was only kept as embers, in a lockbox on a very high, very dusty shelf in her mind.

Another week of healing went by, and you were finally able to stop wearing your arm in a sling. You spent the day traveling back to your place to grab some things you’d need for the next few days. Tess insisted you stay in the apartment with her and Joel while you healed. You hadn’t been home since the day you were attacked, other than the days Tess was kind enough to retrieve some things for you.

As of present day, you had gained the ability to walk on your ankle back after almost a month of being off it. The first thought in your head the morning of was that a trip outside the walls of the apartment. You also knew others might want to pay you a visit if you returned back by yourself, which is when you mentioned the idea to Tess.

“Yeah, you’re definitely not going alone. I’ll come with. When do we leave?”

“Right now.” You grinned at her with content before you went to grab your pack.

The two of you flew down the steps and out the door, Tess following behind you with caution. Your first step into the outside air was something you missed within almost a month of being indoors. While it wasn’t exactly sunny, the cool air was refreshing against your skin and differed greatly from the apartment.

“Don’t run off now.” the older woman muttered, shutting the door behind her. Just from the way you moved, Tess could tell you were in need of something like this. You looked around at the same old streets of the QZ like it was something completely new. She felt lucky to be the one seeing this part of you, the healed and healthy part.

“C’mon, I’ll lead the way.” You turned back to her, noticing her hazel eyes trained in your direction, then shifted to the path in front of you. A few minutes of walking passed, and you’d picked up some pairs of eyes looking your way from people on the surrounding streets. It was more of a side eye glance than a stare, but still you noticed it. After being terrified to leave the four walls of the apartment, being perceived was a bit more intimidating than you thought it’d be. You slowed your steps, letting Tess catch up with you.

“Um, Tess?” You mumbled, glancing back towards her.

“What’s up?”

“All these people keep staring...”

Tess surveyed the area before noticing something you hadn’t, and she chuckled.

“They’re not looking at you, they’re staring at me.” You did a quick glance back and forth, fidgeting with your fingers nervously.

“Are you sure?”

“I’m sure. Let’s keep going.” You turned back after nodding to her, hiding the tiny smile that snuck its way onto your lips. It was almost like walking with a scary dog at your side, except said scary dog was the taller woman trailing behind you.

From the way multiple pairs of eyes shot in her direction, some glazed over, some didn’t notice as you passed by. Other pairs of eyes widened as they fell on the figure of the woman behind you. You don’t know how she’s done it, but Tess Servopolous has the Boston QZ wrapped around her finger. It seemed everyone–including Joel Miller himself– had themselves under her spell. They did whatever she wanted the moment she asked. There was no second guessing her, and when she said to do something, you were damn well to do it. You learned the hard way during your healing process, stubborn and complaining that you couldn’t get around on your own.

One night when you were bickering, she’d tried to convince you that you weren’t ready to try and walk on your bad ankle yet. Stubborn and impatient, you kept talking back to her.

“Don’t even try to get up.”

You’d been overstressing yourself about getting back on your feet, so as to find another way to keep smuggling.

“Watch me.” You had hoisted yourself off the couch halfway, then used the last of your stamina to pull yourself the rest of the way up. The first step you took was with your good foot, but the minute you stepped with the other, you groaned and stumbled from the pain, landing on the ground.

“I told you…” Tess was at your side before you could attempt to move yourself back to the couch.

Gentle and slow, her hands around your body were familiar as if you’d known them to be the hands of a long time lover. They were just Tess’s hands, but to you, they couldn’t hurt or kill any more than they could wash over your injuries with a soft touch. When you got a better look at her for the first time, you saw the kindness in her eyes, and her heart in the actions she took towards you.

Common human decency was to take care of someone injured or sick, but you felt something different in the way she tended to you. It was in the way she used her hand to lift up your chin to check how your cuts were healing. Especially when she inspected the one on your lip for a bit too long, claiming it was healing fast and that you shouldn’t try to open it again. All you could hear when she spoke was your own heart beating in your ears, lost in the hazel of her eyes. She’d even found you a cane, but you paid it no mind and kept letting her help you instead.

“I’d hate to feel like a burden…”

“It’s alright, I don’t mind taking care of you.” A warmth flushed through your cheeks when her words hit your ears.

You could tell somewhere deep down, Tess used to care for people as easy as breathing. From the way she knew so much about patching others up, she wanted to keep people going, no matter the circumstances, you knew she cared much more than she showed.

Being on your feet again, outside those same bland apartment walls brought a new feeling you weren’t able to identify. It was different not walking alone for once in the streets, always having to glance over your shoulder just in case. Now when you looked over your shoulder, you saw Tess, and you hoped she’d stay in your life for longer than just when you were healing from your injuries. She meant too much to you to just forget about after she’d been by your side the whole time.

The route to your apartment wasn’t far from where Tess lived, and you were there within no time. It was a bit overwhelming once you came up to the door, fidgeting with the keyring until it clicked into the lock.

“Well, here we are.” You opened the door, stepping into the stale air of your place. Things were as you’d left them, with a few odds and ends out of order from when Tess had stopped by for some of your toiletries. All your knickknacks were scattered about, some across the countertops and any spare surface you could find. Some, if not most, were collected on the road, and others were from your home when you first fled.

“Nice place you got here.”

“You should know, being the only person to be here besides me in the past few weeks.” you chuckle, shoving your keys back in your jeans pocket. They actually happened to be Tess’s, but you couldn’t tell the difference anymore. She didn’t mind either.

She’d been contemplating a lot on the walk over, worried about what might happen when you were fully healed. Tess knew there was a problem when her heart warmed at the sight of you sleeping peacefully on the couch, then remembered what you’d been through and wanted to burn the whole QZ down.

It was almost gone when you started to heal, until she couldn’t sleep thinking about what could happen to you when you went back out there. A wave of restlessness washed over her, and it’d been very hard to accept the fact that you could end up right back where she found you.

“Guess you’re right.” Tess muttered, stepping into the cool air of the apartment.

“I’ll be a minute, gonna grab some clothes and then we can head back.” You spoke, her eyes trailing down your back as you walked into the other room. Silently, she moved about the main room, her eyes catching all the different little objects around the space. Tess didn’t know how you had time to collect all these different things– from shells to rocks to other small toys and charms that lay about– there was no shortage of oddities. Before she knew it, she was standing in front of your open bedroom door. Timidly, she peeked inside to see you rustling through a few drawers and shoving clothes into a backpack.

“Nice… room. Cozy.” You glanced up at her for a moment while folding the clothes to put in your bag.

“Thanks, I tried to make it as home-y as possible. Makes up for the whole quarantine zone thing.”

“I get it.” Tess chewed the inside of her lip nervously, stepping into the room slightly, leaning one of her arms against the doorframe.

“Do you? That place of yours is barely decorated.” You snarked, trying to cover up how aware you were of how domestic she looked standing in your bedroom doorway. She was perfect with the light beams of sunlight peeking over her shoulder.

“Guess stuff like that doesn’t really matter to me.”

But she wanted it to matter; she wanted it to matter to her so desperately. For you, she’d do anything– put up with whatever you threw at her, because she cared. There wasn’t a way to tell when Tess noticed this fire burning inside her, lit aflame by your out righteousness.

She pined to see reminders of you every day when she wakes up. To see you when she opened her eyes in the morning. You’d simply been indented into her mind, and refused to give way.

“Y’know, you’re still welcome at my place after you get back on your feet. Seriously. My place is yours.” Tess took a step into your room nervously.

“Oh, well thanks. That means a lot. I mean… I’m really grateful for everything you’ve done for me. It’s not like we won’t see each other ever again. I’ll probably spend most nights at your place when we start working together.”

I would never want to stop coming around you either way…

On the instance of becoming friends with the woman who saved your life, it occurred to you quite rapidly that the feelings you had for her weren’t just appreciation. It shouldn’t have been that easy to realize you wanted her… to be entranced with her in a way so distracting. Some days you weren’t sure if you were actually feeling better on account of listening to every groove of her voice streak through your mind with no return. You could hardly believe she was standing in your apartment as of today, let alone sharing a space so intimate as your bedroom.

“Besides… It's your apartment. You must both want your respective space back.”

Tess sighed, masking the pit in her stomach when she thought about you on your own again. God forbid you ended up right where she found you; that would be a gut wrenching nightmare. It was already hard enough seeing you beaten up and barely hanging on to life. To even ponder the idea that it could happen again? She’d take absolutely no chances.

Getting protective when you’ve known them for three weeks, Tess? Pretty weak to let someone in while you couldn’t protect the rest of them.

“Even when you do start working with us, you’ll be right between me and Joel. That way you’ll always have one of us on your six, watching your back. We’ll have your back.” She started with a small smile, while simultaneously ignoring the voice in her head. You met her eye and nodded with a smile, zipping your bag shut.

“Very considerate of you, Tess. But if you don’t teach me how to hold my own, I’ll start practicing on Joel.” You slung your bag across your shoulder, watching as Tess followed you out.

“Oh, I’ll definitely teach you. Joel will just have to be fine with being the dummy.” She followed with a chuckle, taking another look at the interior of your bedroom like she would never see it again.

“Well, don’t worry. I’ll still be on your couch tonight.” You said, before walking out the door and locking it behind Tess.

The only epiphany Tess had that day was that she never wanted you to leave. Never wanted to lose sight of you, never wanted to be without you, could never even imagine losing you. Tess had stuffed all those warm feelings down in a tight little box that sat on a dusty shelf in the back of her mind. When she would revisit the idea of actually having a chance with you, she was unsure. But she’d do her damndest in the meantime to shove away those pesky butterflies in her stomach.

It would be a long, long time before she revisited that box again.

a/n: i linked it at the top but i will link it here as well, this is a prequel to another one of my fics called long long time. You can find that fic here and all my other tess fics here!

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