#i did THIS

[egberts]

just found out there's a national grape shortage and i now feel insanely bad about accidentally letting a bag of grapes go bad two months ago

#i did this

[piaart]

Terzo Cheers for Sweet Omega

#my art #ghost #ghost bc #the band ghost #ghost bc fanart #ghost the band #ghost fanart #papa emeritus #papa emeritus iii #terzo #omega ghoul #nameless ghoul #omega 3 #terzomega #look man i got no sleep no nicotine no caffeine im losing my mind #and instead of finishing a deadline #i did this

[some-zer0]

Damascus Arc my beloved

#rqg #rusty quill gaming #grizzop drik acht amsterdam #sasha racket #I did this #I'm making this my new pfp but I haven't devided if I want it to be Grizzop or Sasha yet... #I actually dug through my old archery stuff for Grizzop

[redditreceipts]

sapphire winter days

sending love to whereever you are 💕

#aesthetic #winter #night #winter days #winter days aesthetic #winter aesthetic #blue aesthetic #blue #nature #nature aesthetic #mine #I did this

[radiance1]

Pariah Dark. Ghost King. Master of War. Tyrant. The Breaker of Worlds.

Currently found himself... perplexed and at a loss.

He had assumed he would never be free once more, the one-time his punishment was cut short he wrote it off as the mistake it was. A pitiful fool who believed he could claim his crown from his prison without consequences.

The second time.

Well.

He would not have thought himself to be so lucky, assuming that no other would be foolish enough to free him once more.

He most likely should have learned not to assume a lot of things, when one is more than acquainted with the Master of Time. There was a lot he would do and did for the other before his eternal rest, and a lot of things he could've wrapped his mind around, found out the reason for, even so long as he had the clues no doubt left by Time.

But this.

This.

He was not exactly sure what his expression was, he could not even decide what exactly he was feeling, even. "Dearly belo-" Pariah Dark hid his mistake by clearing his throat. "Master of Time, what exactly do you intend for me to do with... these."

'These' referred to the small beasts currently amusing themselves on his body. A pitch-black chick with red eyes currently nesting in his hair, a snake trying to loop itself-and failing at looping- itself around his neck, a puppy currently resting on his arm and a cub currenting trying to get said puppy's attention only to be zapped away by the pup's foot.

Yes.

Zapped.

Despite this utterly befuddling situation, he was amused by it nonetheless.

"Your parole," The Master of Time said, all-knowing smile on his face. "Surely you would know what to do with children, would you not?"

Pariah Dark blinked. "What in the infinite is a parole?" Pariah tasted the word on his tongue, as if it was foreign to him. And, well. It was. "And what, exactly, would that have to do with children?"

The Master of Time's smile eased into faint amusement, as if aware of some joke the king himself was not.

Which happened more often than not, actually.

"Take good care of these children, and you shall be released from eternal sleep." He said, as if that explained everything. But Pariah Dark was staring at him in clear and undisguised puzzlement.

He then raised an eyebrow. "You would leave me alone with children? Truly? With no qualms?"

The personification of Time nodded, and Pariah could blink slowly, as if he had trouble wrapping his head around this. "Dearly beloved, surely you would not think that this-" If Clockwork noticed his slip of the tongue, then he didn't point it out as Pariah Dark continued. "Would be the best of ideas, no? Surely, you should be worrying for their safety."

Clockwork's eyes filled with mirth as he inclined his head slightly. "Well, do you currently hold any thoughts of harming these children?"

Pariah Dark's face gave away his faint confusion. "Not particularly, no."

"Then that is that." The ancient ghost nodded, as if everything was already decided and done as Pariah could only stare at him in unsurprised exasperation before shaking his head.

Perhaps, he should have expected this.

"The one currently making a nest of your hair goes by Vlad, the Pheonix King." Clockwork pointed his staff to the chick in question, who squinted open an eye before nestling further into the king's hair. He then pointed to the snake. "The one currently trying to strangle you, is Danny. Our prince as well as what humans would call an eastern dragon."

The way Clockwork pronounced our had Pariah feeling like it held another meaning and not just him being known as the prince.

Was there something he was not aware of...?

The staff then pointed to the pup dozing off in his arms. "That one," Clockwork said with faint amusement. "Goes by Dan, a fusion between the phoenix and dragon resulted in his creation and he soon became his own entity after becoming secluded from his timeline after its erasure." He said this casually, as if it weren't something that would cause questions. "He is also a Raiju."

How a bird and snake gave way to dog, Pariah does not know.

The staff then pointed to the last child in his arms, trying to bother Dan and being kicked away and zapped for its efforts. "That is Dani, formally Danielle. She is a Mishipeshu who is the only successful clone of the phoenix and dragon, making her our technical princess."

Again, the emphasis of our left Pariah feeling like there was something he should know. A missing piece to a puzzle he didn't even know he had started.

"You said this one was a king, correct?" Pariah asked, shifting around his arms to better support the pup and cub. "Would the phoenix's not take offense to me of all people being the one to raise their ruler?" As soon as the words left his tongue did he remember who exactly he was talking to.

He was met with a vicious smile, one that he did not see until the days of yore. His non-existent heart skipped a beat.

"Well, if they would like to voice their... displeasure." The Master of Time practically purred that sentence out, and Pariah felt something odd shift inside him. "Then they are surely allowed to do so."

Pariah grunted, silent for a few moments. Clockwork moved towards him in that time, and Pariah stood still, only tracking the ghost with his eyes. "I am quite certain you would make a wonderful father, dear-"

Excuse him, dear..?

"-So why not prove me right as you always have, hm?" Pariah Dark blinked, opening his mouth to speak before his mind screeched to a halt as he felt a pair of lips upon his own before they moved away in the next moment.

A ghost of a kiss.

"Now, run along now why don't you." Clockwork had a mischievous glint in his eyes, before Pariah found himself surrounded by a wide pasture, spanning as far as his eyes could see (and he could see very far) and at the end a forest with a house behind him.

But he could not react, even as he felt pecks upon his head, a bite at his ear and most surely the scratching of claws against his form.

His hair burst into green flames as he stood stalk still.

#danny phantom #phoenix vlad #dragon danny #raiju dan #Mishipeshu dani #dp dark ages #darkages #Pariah Dark wasn't taking the hint so Clockwork decided to step it up a notch #Unfortunately (for Pariah and everyone else) that just left the man in bluescreen mode #Not that it inconvenienced Clockwork because he's finds it amusing #Feared king of the Infinite rendered useless with a mere kiss #Honestly this might be the only ship I actively ship in this fandom lmao. #Felt like writing and I wanted another mythology beast idea so yea #I did this #Was supposed to dcxdp but Meh it'll be fine as is :3 #Right the phoenix's don't really take Vlad's 'situation' pleasantly but it's not like they could just forcefully take him back into their #custody lmao #Right none of the quartet really remember their past so they're genuine babies now #Blame Clockwork for that one really #Aight better stop yappin now #Gabye

[caramelomolhado]

#finished #i guess #art #i did this #artemis #hades game #artemis hades game

[ironrad]

Steve: Hey guys, someone want to explain why there’s a “no metal in the microwave” sign in the kitchen?

Natasha: …Clint?

Clint: I swear to GOD it was not me.

Natasha: Peter?

Peter: In my defense-

Tony: He’s literally an aspiring chemical engineer, and I caught him trying to heat up leftovers in a tin foil container.

Peter:

Clint: Still waiting on that defense, kid.

Peter: …and I would’ve gotten away with it too if it weren’t for you meddling kids.

#incorrect avengers #incorrect mcu quotes #incorrect irondad quotes #incorrect peter parker #incorrect tony stark #irondad #irondad and spiderson #spider man #iron man #peter parker #tony stark #steve rogers #clint barton #natasha romanoff #the avengers #want to know a secret #it was me #i did this #i have no excuse

[cybrdefect]

the drawing took 19 hours, the tattoo took 3 1/2 hours

IG: @/digitallycursed

#tattoo #creepy art #i did this #cool art #artist #neotraditional #check out my work #lookie #tattoo artist #my work #what do you think?

[chaoticas-hell]

Andrew: Neil isn't allowed to have metal spoons anymore

Nicky: why? Is it because he knows how to kill someone with one?

Andrew: no. Neil, do you want to tell the group why you can't use metal spoons anymore?

Neil:

Neil: I broke my tooth. Twice.

Andrew: there you have it

Matt: at least it's not murder

Aaron: this time

#fun fact #I did this #my front tooth is fake #i also broke my braces like this #im projecting Neil #sorry boo #aftg #all for the game #andrew minyard #neil josten #andreil #the kings men #tkm #kevin day #aaron minyard #aftg kevin #matt boyd #nicky hemmick #aftg shitpost #all for the game my beloved #all for the gay #all for the game incorrect quotes

[moonschocolate]

shameless, 4.05

V: And pay them how? Mickey: We don't. We just tell them we'll pay them. If they complain about 'em we'll beat the shit out of 'em.

#imprenditore nato #shameless #mickey milkovich #I DID THIS

[waxsuyaaa]

junji ito and splatoon collab?? whoah

i want this to be real in the future i will manifest it in my dreams

#splatoon #splatoon fanart #splatoon 3 #splatoon oc #oc #junji ito #junji ito panels #my art #hahahhehshshsh #i lied #it was me all along #i did this #im sad it’ll never be real #splatoon octo expansion #commander tartar #octo expansion #splatoon oe #splatoon 2 octo expansion #splatoon 2

[hajizomenoise]

#Tiefling shura wolf #wolf #sekiro shadows die twice #sekiro #bg3 #crossover #i did this #because I can #give him tail and horns

[qtubbo]

Sunny so would be the type of kid to wear big poofy dresses and climb to the top of the playground (like 5 feet) and jump off because their dress would make them float like a princess (it does not).

#Qsmp #qsmp sunny #I did this

[some-zer0]

Resident charismatic older siblings with mysterious pasts (surely nothing bad will happen to them).

AKA I wanted to draw the OIAR crew with the Archive crew member I think most resembles them, and these two are hella similar atm

#tmagp #tma #the magnus archives #the magnus protocol #alice dyer #timothy stoker #I know who I want to draw for the rest of the OIAR crew #but Martin’s going to be left out… #sorry Marto #I did this

[cineresis]

Angels in America

It's amazing how fast an evening at your favorite club can be ruined by someone keeling over and frothing at the mouth. The band never quite gets back into the swing of things afterwards.

"Angel," sighed one of the men, or nearest approximants, at the table next to mine, "why is it that I can never go anywhere with you without stumbling across a body?"

"Oh, come now," said his partner, a soft, fluffy confection in caramel and cream, rising hastily to make his way toward the source of the commotion. The first gentleman, dark, lanky, and excruciatingly chic, got up to follow him. "It's hardly every time."

I stayed where I was for now, casting my gaze around the room as I went over my memory of the past twenty or thirty minutes. Too many people passing close enough to slip something into the victim's drink, too many others to watch at the same time, too many more opportunities to poison him outside my field of view. I was a detective, not God.

"Stumbling upon, once. Literally. Do you know what it's like to have to clean up after that sort of thing? It takes a personal toll."

"Hush, Crowley," chided "Angel". "People can hear you, and you know how queer they get about these things. Ooh, yes, that's strychnine, all right," he added cheerfully, pulling a small vial from his vest pocket and tipping it into his handkerchief. "Nasty stuff."

I got up. As I approached, I caught the faint, unmistakable chemical sweetness of ether fumes and gave them a wide berth, choosing instead to inspect the victim's plate and glass before turning to scan the room from this perspective.

"Now, just what might you be doing?" drawled Crowley.

I looked him over, too, while I was at it. In Crowley's case, this involved a lot of looking and not much over; he was easily more than six feet tall, even while slouching rakishly. The snake tattoo on his right temple suggested certain things about him. The dark glasses that he hadn't removed since he'd entered just suggested questions, since I highly doubted he was blind. "I'm a detective," I said, leaving the obviously at the end of that sentence to implication. "What are you doing?"

This response seemed to delight him. "So are we," Crowley answered, and grinned. "But if you want to get specific about it, I'm keeping you distracted while my friend saves this man's life. Let's see your license, then."

As I took it out, keeping at least one eye on him and his partner, Angel called out to the rubbernecking crowd around us, "I need someone here to run and call the nearest hospital, and a couple of strong men to help get this poor fellow someplace dark and quiet to rest. Best use one of the tablecloths for a stretcher," he added to the first volunteer who stepped forward.

Crowley leaned in closer to study my license. "Drake Silas Donovan," he read off. "'Silas', really?"

"What about it?"

"I've just always wondered what kind of parent would name their kid Silas."

"The kind who had a grandfather named Silas," I replied coolly, snagging my license back. "Your turn."

He obliged. Anthony J. Crowley, it read, licensed in London since 1905, the year before mine. I wondered how long he'd been at this; he looked too young for his apparent age, but then I looked too old for mine. "A. J. Crowley," I read his signature aloud. "Get asked if you're any relation every time, or just most?"

There's a certain motion a person's head makes when they roll their eyes. Crowley's was making it. "The man's an embarrassment to the side," he griped. "I made my name legitimately."

"And your friend?" It wasn't as if I couldn't put two and two together. There's a certain type of person who's got both a nose for trouble and the brains to prepare for it; if it walks, talks, and thinks like a dick, it probably is one. It was just that I wasn't in the habit of trusting people, and I'd be a real schmuck to neglect basic due diligence on the guy purportedly surrounded by bodies. 

Detectives are no better or worse than any other person. They just think it's usually more interesting to solve crimes than commit them.

"Oh, he's as legitimate as it gets." Crowley turned to his companion, who was getting to his feet, brushing his clothes off fussily. Beside him, the two volunteers hoisted the unconscious victim onto a tablecloth spread across the floor, momentarily dislodging the ether-soaked cloth before Angel caught it and laid it carefully back in place over the victim's nose and mouth. "Aren't you, Aziraphale?"

Angel — "Aziraphale"? — looked up, startled. "Pardon?"

"Mr. Donovan here wants to see your detective's license," Crowley explained, enunciating his words with malice aforethought.

"Oh! Yes. Of course I always have that with me. Now just where did I..." He started patting down his pockets, stopped suddenly, and took a lovely calfskin card holder out of his coat. "Ah. Here it is."

Beaming, he passed it to Crowley, who passed it to me with the comment, "You'll find everything in order, I'm sure."

I glanced down at the card, then back up at Angel. "Am I supposed to call you A. Z. Fell or Aziraphale?" I asked, pronouncing the Z correctly as zed.

"A. Z. Fell is how 'Aziraphale' is pronounced in the King's English," said Crowley blandly, affecting a cut-glass Oxford accent on the last phrase. His partner seemed pleased by this comment, rather than annoyed.

"I'm afraid my progenitor bestowed me with a rather unwieldy given name," Fell admitted, raising fascinating questions about just how many syllables the British peerage could fit on a birth certificate when they really tried. "Aziraphale just sounds so much more euphonious, don't you think?" Crowley was right; I couldn't tell whether Fell had meant to say A. Z. Fell or the de-accented gloss. He'd lengthened the half-syllable between zed and Fell to a full vowel, but some people said zetta.

"I wouldn't know," I replied, handing the license back to Crowley, who was nearest. When Fell didn't take my bait, I added, "Lucky that you happened to have ether handy. I wouldn't like to imagine what might've happened if you'd decided to stay in tonight." I also lied when I said sorry, and when I swore to tell the whole truth and nothing but. Little white lies are the oil in the gears of civilization.

"Oh, I always carry that, too," Fell explained earnestly. "One gets into the habit after one's first run-in with strychnine, and of course ether has so many useful applica—"

"I wouldn't, angel," Crowley interrupted, sounding very amused. "Mr. Donovan thinks you're the one behind this."

"Oh," said Fell, nonplussed. "Gosh. Well, I — I suppose I can't blame him. He doesn't know me from Adam, after all, and has no reason to trust me — I did warn you about giving people funny ideas, Crowley, honestly. Of course," Fell turned to me, laying an elegant hand across his chest, "if you were to search me, you would find only a small collection of antidotes — oh, but a habitual poisoner would probably carry those, too, especially if he were the sort of voyeur with a penchant for playing the hero. I certainly wouldn't be convinced of my innocence. Yes, I can certainly understand whatever suspicion you might feel towards me, however misplaced it may be."

Crowley watched this thought process with an expression somewhere between fascination and agony. "Well, at least now he probably thinks that if you'd done it, you'd have been caught by now," he remarked, presumably because he was thinking the same thing. "You'll have to excuse my friend," Crowley added to me. "He still believes that the innocent have nothing to fear. Somehow."

"First time visiting?" I guessed.

Fell's bemusement answered my question before he did. "Pardon?"

"Never mind."

#good omens #1920s #noir #detective fiction #lgbt fiction #original fiction #(as it were; i should probably go back and tag the posts in this series more identifiably) #is this a human AU or are Crowley and Aziraphale just huge nerds? i don't know and neither does the outsider-POV narrator #i will finish this if there is public demand but otherwise This Is What You Get #(other stuff is still in the pipeline. this has just been a fuck of a year.) #i did this #my writing #a good man is hard to find (no not that one)

[stopwatchclockwatch]

I doubt Galacta Knight would be able to wear most hats.

#kirby #meta knight #galacta knight #yeah no i just saw meta knight with the goofy hat for the 25th time and thought #'maybe i should do something with it' #i did this #and it was funnier in my head #i mean i could've gone with the other one but it requires polishing and i din't have the time to do that im afraid