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hibiscusfairys · 8 months

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🐞 draco malfoy ; unrequited love, part 5 (hufflepuff fem reader)

♪ a lots gonna change : weyes blood

part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4

♡ warnings: angst

tagged: @miawastakens @watercolorskyy @pinkynecktie

also to the last person who requested to be tagged, im so sorry but i cant seem to find your blog when i try to tag it :(

by the way a reference to the last chapter, i realised adrian pucey is two years older than harrys year, so for the sake of it not being weird just pretend he was a year older than us

☆

You cried all night.

You didn’t know if whether you had swayed him, or distanced him from you even more. Each passing thought that involved him had only provoked your yearning tears. By the end of the long evening, your pillow was wet with the heartbreak and sadness you wept for him.

You were stupid enough to believe he was for you. The muggleborn girl and the pureblooded boy with a family full of blood supremacists which he was surely influenced from — yeah, right. What a foolish imagination you must have.

Dawn had rolled around, and your quiet sobs had eventually stopped and morphed into your sleep. The bright light of the sun shone through the fogged window, reflecting onto your hair. Your yellow duvet covers were spread everywhere, and the mascara you had worn from the ball before had stained your pillow like watery, black ink.

You rose up from your slumber, increasingly light headed from all the thinking you had been doing all night. It was time to finally get on with your life, and leave this all behind. Your feelings for him would have to disappear, soon enough.

Your ball dress was still on, and was crumpled from the action of tossing and turning restlessly in your bed.

A letter was positioned unknowingly on the windowsill. You noticed that the window door was open, the cold air hitting your face like a vent. You saw that a midnight feathered owl with amber eyes as bright as streetlights perched on the sill, looking at you with its pupils dilating.

Eagerly, you opened the letter, hoping it to be from your parents. They had only just figured out how to use the owl. But the envelope looked too classy, too posh even. Nothing like the basic white envelopes you’d usually see.

It had a certain family emblem on the black seal.

Ripping the top of the envelope, you lifted the mysterious letter from the pocket. You had almost instantly recognised the handwriting, as you had seen it in your potions class not too long ago. It was Malfoy’s.

The words were carefully carved with ink on the parchment, and ink smudges seemed to be far less of a problem for him to prevent than it was for you. Using a quill and proper ink was still something to get used to, even if it had been 4 years. You anxiously let your eyes scan the page, a lump forming in your hoarse throat from all the sobbing. To….

I apologise for my previous behaviour last night

I understand that I may have upset you. This is quite new to me actually. I’m too wrapped up in myself to recognise others problems, if I am being honest.

However, while I still stand by what I said about us not working out, I do want to create a compromise with you. And before you ask, I’ve dealt with Astoria. It was entirely difficult for me to tell her. And to be honest, I am feeling quite down. But I’m still so confused on where my heart is leading and I don’t want to lead her on either. She’s one of the only people I care about. Except for my family and some others which I won’t name.

If you are so desperate, it will have to be a hidden secret between us. If I ever eventually decide to let myself love you, while the guilt might weigh heavily on me, I am not afraid of it. It is quite dismaying knowing that you aren’t a pure-blood like I am, but I want to learn to be more tolerant at least. And I’ll try to be more open. But don’t let a word slip out. I’m sorry if I am asking much. I should really not ask you of anything, but I can’t help it. I’m still adjusting to this. I thought it would be so easy, love. But it’s not. Sometimes we fall in love with the wrong people. But I don’t want to label you as wrong. Rather — unexpected. My family will surely be disappointed, so it’s why I’m so hesitant. But it’s a risk I am willing to take for my heart to finally be at rest. It has been tugging on me for weeks.

Do answer me later. Moreover, maybe I can explain it to you better in person.

Draco Malfoy

You saw your tears melt onto the paper. Different emotions poured through you like a rainfall, you felt excited and happy, but also unnerved. It disappointed you that he couldn’t accept you in the first place.

You found out your quill and a pot of ink.

To Malfoy,

Thank you for your letter. I am glad that you’ve explained to me your feelings. Sometimes writing it down makes everything better.

But please, do accept me as I am. I don’t want to pressure you into doing something you won’t find comfort in. Plus, it would put me in danger too. I don’t know what your family is like, but I don’t want to entrust them just yet.

However, I do feel similarly. Maybe we could try it.

I’d be glad to keep it a secret for you.

From…

You finally signed your name in one swoop of your quill.

“Hopefully..” You say to yourself, handing the addressed envelope to the messenger owl.

☆

thank you all so much for reading this fic, i appreciate all the support youve given me so much and im excited to write more future ones for you soon ♡

also im sorry if the ending seems quite rushed, i had no idea what to do and i didnt want to keep anyone waiting too long :( ill try to improve on this in the future and hopefully, not pressure myself too much with releasing chapters

#harry potter #harry potter fic #draco x reader #angst #draco angst #draco imagine #draco malfoy angst #draco x female reader #draco x hufflepuff!reader #draco malfoy x reader #draco x muggleborn!reader #draco x muggleborn

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hanniluvi · 4 months

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( 💿 ) YOU’RE BLUSHING? — JI CHANGMIN FIC

[ DAY TWELVE ] of the advent calendar !

( 💿 ) SYNOPSIS . . as much as you wanted to deny that you had feelings for him, it was getting harder to ignore ever since he commented on how pink your face was—knowing that it was caused because of him.

( + ) PAIRING . . friend!changmin x gn!reader

( 💿 ) GENRE . . fluff, crack kinda, mutual pining, friends 2 lovers (GET IT AWAY FROM ME I CANT STOP WRITING FOR F2LS.)

( + ) WARNINGS . . eric kinda pushy but hes js trying to be a wingman, reader is a lil mean BUT W GOOD INTENTIONS, some profanity

( 💿 ) NOTE . . ignore that im like sm days late im trying to hold myself accountable okay 😭 life has been lifeing and posting daily is hard i applaud people that r able to post sm everyday .. at this rate im gonna post 4 fics a day im so behind .. anyways lets totally pretend i didnt snatch this idea from irl !

“Do you like him?” Eric pressured you to answer for the millionth time, trying to get the truth out of you. He would always bring up this question during the last period, knowing it was just you and him around and not anyone else. Even with him showing his puppy eyes, you looked at him, and repeated the answer you’d always tell him. “No, I don’t like Changmin.”

“You’re lying again,” Eric sighed, knowing how stupid you would be trying to figure out your real feelings for your best friend, Ji Changmin.

Changmin is clearly your type—you know that, and even Eric knows that. But according to you, he’s too perfect for you, which only causes Eric to roll his eyes. He’s more like a perfect pair for you, if he does say so himself. Either way, you can’t really tell if Changmin even feels the same way.

So, you’re afraid, leading up to you not confessing your feelings at all—even if someone (Eric) tries to convince you to, you would not even make a move.

“Seriously, I don’t know why you wouldn’t confess,” Eric says, popping a piece of gum in his mouth.

“…Because I don’t like him like that?”

“And I can stuff 50 pepero sticks in my mouth–wait…maybe I can. Whatever–don’t make me go off track!” He pointed at you, like you had anything to do with his absurd ideas anyways. “That’s the biggest lie I’ve ever heard from you.”

Do you even like Changmin like that?

“Whatever.” The bell rang, signifying that everyone was allowed to leave for the day. Looking out of the nearby window, you could already see bits of snow falling down, and Eric was all excited. “It’s snowing!”

“Great…” You already knew it was going to be cold, and you really hated walking in the cold. But, the snow was going to make the walk back home even worse than it already was. “Come on, let’s go!” He drags you by the arm, hurrying over to the lockers.

Your locker conveniently stands between Eric's and Changmin's, offering a seamless meeting point for the trio of best friends. As you chat with Eric, the familiar voice of Changmin interrupts your conversation.

"Hey!" Changmin's voice accompanies his quick steps as he approaches with a broad smile on his face. Eric nudges you, and you shoot him a scornful look. "What?"

"Nothing," you whisper back to Eric, well aware that Changmin is eyeing the two of you curiously. The dynamics of your friendship triangle always keep things interesting.

“Anyways—” Eric continues, with a mischievous glint in his eye, suggesting he's up to something once again. “I have to go with Sunwoo, so you two have fun!”

"Wait, what? Doesn’t Sunwoo have soccer practice—” Before you can finish, Eric waves a quick goodbye and scurries off. You knew him well enough to sense that he orchestrated this moment for you and Changmin. After all, he claims you have feelings for him, something you vehemently deny. Changmin, unfazed by Eric's antics, takes the opportunity to suggest, “Want to do something after school now that Eric ditched us?”

“Sure, why not?” you casually say, closing the locker door in front of you. “You lead the way, Mr. Chang.” He rolls his eyes at the sudden nickname, and you can't help but let out a soft giggle, soon walking besides him.

As you and Changmin make your way to the front of the school, he glances at you and notices that you don't have gloves on despite the chilly weather.

“Hey, aren't you cold without gloves?” he asks, concern lacing his voice.

“Hm?”

“Your hands are red already,” Changmin points out. You look down at your hands, and indeed, they are red—the color has spread all over them. In response, you pull up your sleeves, trying to hide the chilly effect.

“I’ll be fine,” you shrug, but he continues to look concerned. His worry tugs at you, appreciating the care he's showing.

Without a word, Changmin takes off his gloves and holds them out to you. “Here, take these. You shouldn't be freezing your hands off.”

You hesitate, ready to refuse, but he insists, sliding the gloves onto your hands regardless. The warmth instantly envelops your cold fingers, and you can't help but appreciate the small act of kindness, feeling yourself smile.

“There—oh! Are you okay? You’re red,” Changmin observes, his hands almost reaching your face. “Do you need my scarf—” You quickly intervene by placing your own hands on your cheeks, feeling the heat.

“Oh—shit…” you mumble, realizing the inevitable, and he tries to perk his ears to catch what you're saying. “I’m blushing…”

“You’re blushing?” he questions, a hint of surprise in his tone. Well, it seems he caught onto those words, making the situation even more awkward.

“Why?” Changmin asks, genuinely puzzled.

Letting out a sigh, you cover your face with your hands and mutter, “It’s because of you, idiot.”

His eyes widen at your response, a mixture of surprise and amusement crossing his face.

"So... you have feelings for me?" Changmin questions.

"No, I totally despise you to the point that my face randomly turns red at the mere sight of you," you retort sarcastically, eliciting a small chuckle from him.

"Now that's more like you."

"Whatever." A moment of quiet descends, and you both share affectionate glances. Taking a step closer, Changmin reaches for both of your hands. "I like you too."

This time, your face turns completely red, and he can't help but enjoy the effect he has on you. Instead of your giggle, you hear faint noises in the background. Turning abruptly, you squint your eyes, only to discover Eric and Sunwoo spying in the corner.

"Eric? Sunwoo?!" you exclaim, causing Eric to accidentally push Sunwoo's face into the snow, and then quickly backing away. "What the heck, Eric?"

"Sorry!"

"They just had to be our friends, huh?" Changmin remarks, and you nod as the other two continue bickering—mostly Sunwoo seeking revenge and Eric pleading for mercy. At least you and Changmin have something sweet going on, rather than being entangled in that chaos.

And now you know you like him like that. No more denying it.

TBZ PERM TAGLIST — @flwoie @haruavrse @bearseulgs @ilovewonyo @wtfhyuck @ineedaherosavemeenow @ilovechanhee @ja4hyvn @vampcharxter

ADVENT CALENDAR MLIST — @en-dream @i-yeseo @yizhoutv @yuma-is-mine @wtfhyuck @sansfransisco

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aanoia · 8 months

Note

So I love speak now (Taylor’s verison) and like I was lowkey hopping for you to do a better than revenge (Taylor’s version) for Sirius black/James potter x reader please?

HII THANK YOU FOR THE REQUEST so so sorry it took me a few days to get out, I hope you like it

Better Than Revenge

Sirius Black x reader words; 2,380 warnings; cheating, fake blood, reader is kinda a dick but its deserved ig uhhh idk how i feel about this fic, so give me some feeback please (if it's not the usual i provide please tell me so I can figure out what's wrong) but IM BACKK i stopped writing for a few days because I've had so much going on lately. I hope you guys enjoy though I know that as I wrote the first part of this yesterday there was something I wanted to mention up here but I can't remember so if something doesn't make sense than ig that's it also yall im so drained and overhwelmed right now so the stories will be coming out slower (they are what make me feel better, so i want to do im not gonna force myself too, they'll just take a bit longer to create) if you love a song, the marauders era, and my writing, request a song fic and your wish shall be my command. enjoy my loves

Now go stand in the corner and think about what you did

Ha-ha, time for a little revenge

The story starts when it was hot, and it was summer, and

I had it all, I had him right there where I wanted him

I smiled happily as I walked onto platform 9 ¾, hand in hand with my boyfriend, Sirius Black. The group had hung out this summer and Sirius had finally asked me out. After what felt like a lifetime of waiting, he was finally mine. And only mine. At least, that’s the impression I received.

We greeted our friends we hadn’t seen since the year ended, and I didn’t fail to notice the way Sirius dropped my hand to tightly hug a blonde I had never met. I narrowed my eyes slightly, and it seemed James had the same idea as we shared a weird look.

She came along, got him alone, and let's hear the applause

She took him faster than you could say "sabotage"

I ran into the Gryffindor common room, shock filling my veins as the painting slammed shut behind me. I stood in the entrance silently, mouth open and eyes focused on a piece of thread which was unraveling from a pillow on the ground.

“Y/n?” Remus asked as he, James, and Peter all walked over to figure out what was going on.

“What happened?” Peter asked, scratching his arm lightly.

I looked at James and shook my head, tears threatening to spill. His posture deflated in defeat as his eyes widened.

“He didn’t? Did he?”

“Who did what?” Remus asked, looking back and forth between James and I as the door flew open.

“Y/n-”

“Don’t.” James cut him off, gently pulling me to the side and stepping in between us. “Just don’t.”

I never saw it coming, wouldn't have suspected it

I underestimated just who I was dealing with (oh)

She had to know the pain was beating on me like a drum

She underestimated just who she was stealing from

“I’m not just gonna let her slut around and steal my boyfriend, James.” I explained and he shook his head.

He sent me a teasing smile, “Whatever happened to girls supporting girls?”

I rolled my eyes, “Nothing. It’s girls supporting girls. Not girls supporting whores.”

“What has that man done to you?” Remus asked, shaking his head.

“He’s broken me, duh. And I’m gonna show both of them not to break things that aren’t theirs.”

She's not a saint, and she's not what you think

She's an actress, whoa

“So, Miss Standley, could you show us your potion?” The potions professor asked and the blonde nodded and stood up.

I winked at James as she began explaining what she did, he rolled his eyes, “So first, I put in diced Mandrake, and it has to be diced because if you just slic-” She was cut off by a yelp as her potion exploded in her face, the green goo covering her entire body. The entire class laughed as I silently slid my wand back into my pockets, missing the glare Sirius sent my way.

The girl ran out of the classroom, Sirius following after her, but not before making sure I saw the glare he sent my way. I smiled with a laugh, simply waving my hand and winking at the boy as he passed by.

He was a moth to the flame

She was holding the matches, whoa

“She what?” I asked Remus with wide eyes and he groaned.

“Don’t be so loud.” He pleaded, looking around to make sure no one heard him.

“She kissed you?”

“Yes.”

“And he breath tastes like garlic?”

“I’m gonna kill you.”

I shrugged with a smile, “At least we know she isn’t a vampire.”

Soon she's gonna find stealing other people's toys

On the playground won't make you many friends

She should keep in mind, she should keep in mind

There is nothing I do better than revenge (revenge), ha

“What are you doing now, Y/n?” Peter asked, causing Remus to look up from his book mid bite and James, who had his arm around Lily, to look over.

I smirked as I watched Sirius and Dolores together, and it only widened as she picked up her goblet to take a drink. I silently mutter an incantation to make her pumpkin juice turn to rum, causing yet another explosion and black soot to darken her face and hair. James and Peter bit back laughs as I sat proudly, arms crossed as people once again laughed at her. Remus just rolled his eyes and continued reading, only slightly finding this situation amusing.

She looks at life like it's a party, and she's on the list

She looks at me like I'm a trend, and she's so over it

I think her ever-present frown is a little troubling, and

She thinks I'm psycho, 'cause I like to rhyme her name with things

I once again smiled proudly as people wore buttons around the school, telling people to vote Y/n L/n as Gryffindor prefect.

I looked up from the small Bowtruckle I had found on a tree as a shriek filled the hall. The Bowtruckle crawled under my sleeve in fear of the annoying sound. Before I could stop myself, I laughed loudly as I saw Dolores fuming over what the buttons turned into when she came near them, Sirius stood beside her, trying to calm her down. Dolores Clitoris (horrible rhyme but it’s the best I got).

Her head snapped towards me, her face became unbelievably red, a vein popping out of her neck as she stormed over, Sirius trailing behind her like a lost puppy.

“You!” She screeched, pointing her finger at me as she fumbled to get her wand. In a moment, she put her wand up only to be met with mine already in her face.

I grinned, “Better think about your next move here, sweetheart. I’ve won against you in duels for DADA multiple times.”

She glared heavily, “Yeah well, you’re just a jealous bitch who couldn’t keep a boyfriend.”

I fake pouted at her, “Awh, you’re so cute. You enjoy your little puppy, I must be off.” I said, stepping to the side and grabbing my bag. As I walked away I paused and turned back around. “Oh, and, you were barely a hard component in getting prefect. I would have rathered some competition, but we both know what you did to them.” I smiled and she looked at me in shock. “Yeah, that’s right, I know what you did.”

But sophistication isn't what you wear or who you know

Or pushing people down to get you where you wanna go

They didn't teach you that in prep school, so it's up to me

But no amount of vintage dresses gives you dignity (think about what you did)

“Peter, what the hell happened?” I asked as I burst through the infirmary doors.

“Y/n, chill out.” James said immediately.

“Was it her?” I asked quietly and he nodded. I looked at Peter in sympathy, knowing she did it only to get back at me.

“Don’t you worry though. She looks worse.” Remus added and Peter smiled at me. I quicked my brow as my eyes wandered to Dolores on the bed, a small cut on her eyebrow as her eye area puffed up largely.

I rubbed Peter's shoulder excitedly, “I’m so proud. I feel like a proud mother.”

She's not a saint, and she's not what you think

She's an actress, whoa

He was a moth to the flame

She was holding the matches, whoa

“No, he can’t know.” I heard a familiar voice whisper and I looked up from my potions essay.

“Dolores, I don’t like sneaking around with you. It’s risky.” Another voice said from behind the bookshelf.

“Baby, I’ll break up with him soon. Don’t worry. Just don’t leave me.” She whispered again and my eyes widened. Why am I not surprised?

Soon she's gonna find stealing other people's toys

On the playground won't make you many friends

She should keep in mind, she should keep in mind

There is nothing I do better than revenge (ha-ha)

“I’m serious. She’s cheating on him, guys. I don’t know what to do.” I told the three boys as we sat in an empty classroom.

“I think it’s time we join you in your pranks.” James decided and I smiled.

“I haven’t heard a smarter thing come from your mouth, Potter.”

“Oh Godric, I’m in.” Remus said begrudgingly and Peter nodded with him, saying he was in too.

I'm just another thing for you to roll your eyes at, honey

You might have him, but haven't you heard?

“There you go, sweeties. You know what to do.” I said quietly as I set down a mama Niffler and her babies, the small group immediately filing through the cracked open dorm of Dolores’ room.

I gave James a thumbs up and he nodded, standing in front of the girls stairway as I also snuck into the room. I cringed as I heard the god awful singing of Dolores and carefully opened the bathroom door. I snatched her clothes and quietly muttered a spell which would turn her water into fake blood in five minutes. Which means I had to be quick. I threw the clothes into the bag I had put an enlargement spell on on the inside and went to her dresser before stuffing all her clothes in it. I locked her friend's dressers with a spell only I could undo and snuck back out after carefully setting the Nifflers - who had gained quite the collection of shineys - into the bag.

I made it out just in time as the moment the door clothes loud screams rang out. I ran down to James who was talking to an angry Sirius. Sirius took a moment to look between James, me, and the bag in my hand while he listened to his girlfriend's cries. I looked at him hard and simply shrugged before walking past him and sitting on the couch, thanking Peter for the Nifflers and Remus for the bag as loud footsteps came down the stairs. I sniggered as Sirius gently led Dolores up the stairs to the boys dormitory, the rest of the Common Room laughing at her crazed figure that was barely covered with a towel. Oh how much fun that was.

I'm just another thing for you to roll your eyes at, honey

You might have him, but I'll always get the last word

Whoa

(Come on, can you take it back?)

(Come on)

“You’ve got some real nerve.” A cold voice said and I jumped slightly, thinking I was alone in the common room. I looked up from my book to see Sirius glaring at me from the bottom of the boys stairs.

I laughed, “Do I?”

Sirius rolled his eyes and stepped forward, “Yeah, you do. You’re just a jealous prick.”

I snorted as I stood from my comfortable spot on the couch, “That’s not how you talk to a woman, Mr. Black.”

“I don’t care. You an arse to someone who doesn’t deserve it. Someone who's kind!”

I scoffed, “That girl is far from kind. You know it.”

“You don’t know her!” He said, raising his voice slightly.

“Yeah, well, you don’t know her either, Sirius!”

She's not a saint, and she's not what you think (no)

She's an actress, whoa (you know that you deserve it)

He was a moth to the flame

She was holding the matches, whoa

“And how the fuck would you know?” He fully yelled this time.

“Oh, I don’t know, man. Did you know she tried to kiss James?”

Sirius scoffed, shaking his head, “You’re a liar.”

“Maybe. She also put Peter in the infirmary.”

“He gave her a black eye!”

“Because she attacked him, for fucks sake!”

“She said he attacked her and you put him up to it!” He yelled and I barely picked up the sound of footsteps scrambling down the stairs.

Soon she's gonna find stealing other people's toys

On the playground won't make you many friends

“And you’re going to believe her over your best fucking friend? I mean, you’re goddamn delusional, Sirius.”

“And you’re jealous!”

She should keep in mind, she should keep in mind

There is nothing I do better than revenge (ha-ha)

“Goddamnit, she’s fucking cheating on you! She’s cheating on you, and you fucking deserve it. And I hope you two know that I’m not fucking done. I will not stop until I’m satisfied.” (I will never be satisfied, he will never be satisfied!) I yelled and stormed past him, hitting my shoulder roughly against his and ignoring the soft calls of Remus and Peter as James went to Sirius.

Do you still feel like you know what you're doing?

'Cause I don't think you do, oh (no, no, no, no)

Do you still feel like you know what you're doing? (No)

I don't think you do, I don't think you do (come on), let's hear the applause

“So, David, is it?” I asked the boy as I sauntered up to him, my button up purposefully unbuttoned enough to see whatever cleavage I had.

The boy looked me up and down with a smirk, “And to whom does it concern?”

I fake laughed loudly, jokingly pulling on his tie, “Me of course!” I said in a sickly sweet voice, cringing inside at myself.

“What do you need, beautiful?” He asked as the doors to the library opened, in the corner of my eyes I saw Sirius and Dolores walk hand in hand. Bingo.

Come show me how much better you are (feels so much better, yeah?)

See, you deserve some applause

'Cause you're so much better

“This.” I whispered and pulled him in by his shirt, smashing my lips. I smirked as a broken gasp filled the quiet area, barely opening an eye to see Dolores standing with tears filling her eyes, and Sirius looking confused. I closed my eyes, deepening the kiss as I raised my middle finger to the two. Paybacks a bitch.

She took him faster than you could say "sabotage"

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whispering-coffee · 4 months

Text

I’ve been holding this off for a while mainly cause I was afraid of doing it but I finally pulled through and now I have a story to share with ya’ll explaining what happened during my hold at the mall!

I went dressed in black leggings and a sweater, bummer that it wouldn’t show I know but i was nervous! I had drank some before leaving my house so by the time I had arrived at the mall i was already feeling the need.

To make sure I was going to suffer (I know i know im a masochist bite me) i drank an entire water bottle i brought with me in the car before actually heading into the mall. So yada yada time passes and im trying to figure out what to do at the mall and I go get myself a drink at the food court then i head off to look around the stores.

About an hour in the mall and its starting to feel pretty urgent but not bursting so i decided hey, why not play a game with myself, and got into a bathroom line. However once i actually went into a stall i just sat there fully clothed not doing anything, still holding it in then shortly after left. Trust me i was getting pretty bored here to have to do that.

I got another drink and finally after finishing it I was getting antsy, crossing my legs and shuffling my feet while i sat at a table.

HEY IF YOU’RE SKIPPING THROUGH THE POST TO FIND THE INTERESTING PARTS ITS OVER HERE

So i go back to looking around stores, feeling my bladder ache each time i take a step and now im actually like, nervous because like its dawning on me that Im really doing this in a public place. Let me say its pretty crowded, its not like the mall barely has anyone in it. So here i am standing around in the corner of a store thinking to myself if I really wanna do it, i was thinking for like a good 5-10 minutes walking back and fourth till i decided i was gonna pull through, after all i made a promise that i would post something interesting and different ;p

I leave the store and about another hour passed and im pretty desperate, like constantly moving around wanna put my hands between my legs desperate. But since it was a public place i couldnt really just do that unless i had to go REALLY bad (foreshadowing haha).

Did i mention it was really cold in the mall, only made everything worse xD

Anyways so Im pretty desperate, i take a seat at the food court again and get ONE MORE drink, and as im sipping on it im squirming in my seat cross legged, im sure anyone who’s into omo would immediately catch on if they saw me.

Just a little bit later im scrolling through my phone with my other hand on top of my lap (not between my legs just yet)

Now Im REALLY anxious because its getting to the point where I know im going to have an accident soon so i get up and just start walking around with my chest aching from nervousness. I even stared at the bathroom in contemplation before walking away.

A couple minutes of aimless walking and i end up having to sneeze.. needless to say a little bit escaped but i stopped it albeit i looked a little silly. My heart dropped during it too.

About ten or twenty so minutes and i have to go REAAALLY bad and im super anxious, i even entered a bathroom line thinking i didnt want to actually wet myself but after a couple minutes of waiting in line i felt another leak which automatically prompted a hand to crotch response, you can imagine my embarrassment.

After the leak I was honestly horrified but also having a LOT of fun, i was close to having an accident so I decided to try to find a secluded area in the mall to hang around in for when i lose control. Each step i took was agony to take but i kept movin, slightly bent over too.

Eventually i found an area where not alot of people were, there were still some but it wasnt as crowded as the other areas. It was like this dead end section with nothing of interest other than a few benches and stores.

I stayed here for about a couple minutes, mild panicking, hella anxious, and kiiiind of excited. Thats when i started losing control. I was kind of in a little corner where a protrusion of wall was blocking me but if you’d still be able to see me if you walked closer to the dead end.

It was a mix of terrified excitement when i tried to stop the flow but couldnt. The sounds of my pee hitting the floor wasnt helping. I dont think anyone actually noticed plus since I was wearing black leggings it wasnt super noticeable. I promptly rushed my way out of the mall keeping my head down leaving behind that puddle.

When i got back to my car i put out the towel i had stored in my trunk over my driver seat so i wouldnt ruin my car seats and kind of just sat in the car thinking about what happened. At the end i actually found the experience really enjoyable and might do it again ;)

#omorashi #omo #female omorashi

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rassvetsky · 1 year

Note

heyyy 🤠 ! i saw that ur ask box is open so do you think you could write some fluff with Steve Rogers abt halloween ?? i’m really craving comfort rn 🥹🥹

im drunk therefore i can barely speak my native language let alone english, and this is a complete mess. i still hope you like it tho bby feel free to request something else if this isnt it :( love you so much fr id commit arson for you i think

Star Spangled Singer

part one | part two

steve rogers x reader

"When you're not sure what to wear for Tony's Halloween party, Steve comes up with a solution. Too bad that he earned a rival as a result, but he's always going to be your favorite Captain America, and you'll always be his favorite Star Spangled Singer."

[2k] | fem!reader, nothing worth adding as a warning except for maria hill because she's hot and her & reader would make a killer couple, mentions of the USO tour, alcohol intake, idk what this is tbh

reblog and/or like for a kiss, feedback much appreciated! not proofread.

"Can't I just go dressed up as… Myself?"

"Steve, that's not how Halloween works," you sighed, arms folded on your chest as you sat cross-legged on the bed right by Steve's legs. He was leaning on the bed frame, one hand keeping his book open from the lower end of it, the other swirling the marker around- and he looked so cozy that you felt a bit guilty about keeping him away from the world of his book. Sighing softly, you slowly moved closer to him and got under the covers, his arm immediately finding its way around your shoulders to keep you close to his chest. "Besides, I think Maria is already going as Captain America, so…"

The grimace which took its place on his face pulled a laugh out of you, as you patted his chest reassuringly, watching him as he carefully jammed the bookmark on the page he was left at. Setting the book down on the nightstand by his side, he wrapped both of his arms around you, slightly pulling you on top of him as you braced yourself on his chest, looking down at him with a silly grin. "What are you going as?"

"Dunno," you hummed happily, reaching to press your lips against his chin when you couldn't bear the lovesick expression he kept sending your way anymore. "I'm so hopeless when it comes to actually picking something. Might as well go dressed as your shield or something."

His warm laugh was enough to bring the smile on your lips even wider. "I might actually have an idea."

You don't even know how he found an exact replica, and you're not willing to ask but the next day, a couple of hours before the party, Steve came back to your shared room in the compound with a costume. Specifically, a Star Spangled Singers costume.

"Did the USO tour in the 40's with the group," he chuckled, watching your bewildered eyes as you ran your fingers through the soft fabric of the outfit, laid out across the bed. "What do you think? Too much?"

"I am going to look awesome with Maria, you have no idea."

A playful frown formed between his brows. "Really? While the actual Captain America is-"

"We both know you're gonna go with a shirt, Steve. Let's not try to fool each other." you giggled, slowly approaching his sitting figure to wrap your arms around his neck and let him pull you into his lap. "It's so cool. God, you're so cool- can't believe I'm dating this guy."

His soft laughter was muffled when he reached in to bury his face in your hair, tugging you closer to his chest as he did so. "You're going to look beautiful in it," he hummed. "Gonna give me the best kind of nostalgia."

"I thought you hated the USO tour-"

"Shut it," he whispered, earning a quiet chuckle from you. "Everything is bearable when it's with you."

Quite literally, every single negative thought he had about the tour vanished the second you walked into the room, hand to hand with Maria Hill who was indeed dressed as Captain America, tight star spangled suit actually fitting her so well that you thought maybe, she could pass as him if she wanted to.

But boy, oh boy; Steve couldn't keep his eyes off of you. Blue sleeveless vest with a deep V cut and three pairs of stars on the collar, flowy red and white skirt short enough to show just enough of your legs, adorned with a black pantyhose. You had a blue cap placed carefully on top of your styled hair, and white gloves going up halfway through your biceps; he couldn't help the way his gaze followed you through when you approached Tony and Nick with Maria, completely ignoring the way Sam nudged his side and waved towards your direction to get your attention. "Damn, she left you for another Captain America? That's cold."

You excused yourself, squeezing Maria's hand slightly before letting go, graceful strut clicking against the marble flooring as you made your way over to the duo. "Hey Wilson, who are you supposed to be?"

Sam faked offense, one hand dramatically going up to his chest to clutch it. "Excuse me? Nat King Cole?"

"I'm supposed to guess Nat King Cole just from the.. suit?"

"Why else would I wear a suit- alright, you know what Cover Girl, I'm gonna leave you and your star-struck boyfriend alone and get as drunk as I possibly could," he declared, giving Steve -who was still watching you with a smile on his lips- a pat on the shoulder before offering you a salute and walking away, towards Rhodey.

You finally returned your attention to your boyfriend then, meeting his sparkly gaze with a big smile. "Hey Cap."

"Wow."

"I know." you giggled. "Maria and I make quite the couple." Steve didn't react much to the joke, too busy staring at your maroon lips and the way they curved upwards- feeling red, white, blue fireworks going off in his chest.

Not that he wasn't used to seeing you all dressed- you could pull literally anything off, in his eyes. From tactical outfits to the silliest pajamas known to humankind, you always looked stunning to him, filling his insides with a boyish kind of giddiness, which he hid well through the serious exterior.

You approached him a bit more then, resting a glove-clad hand on his chest before reaching up to press a kiss against his cheek, trying to break him off of the trance he seemed to be under. "Earth to Rogers?"

"You look incredible," he chuckled, mostly to himself, before getting a hold of your hand to twirl you around once. You did so, rather gracefully, the flowy skirt going up and down in the most hypnotizing way possible. "I might have to keep you away from Maria at all costs. She might just forget to remain professional as Captain America."

"She's equally as hot so it kinda goes both ways," you shrugged, earning a playful scoff from him before he held your hand again, this time bringing it up to his lips to place a soft kiss on top. "Ooh, chivalrous."

"Can we- do you want- hold on, let me just," he cleared his throat as you bit down on your lower lip, holding back a laugh. "Can I get this beautiful lady a drink?"

"Did I just get you all flustered, Rogers?" you chuckled, slowly dragging him towards the bar as he laughed along, sheepish. "Good thing you have no idea what's under this outfit."

"What? Wait, what's under the outfit?" he asked, although his hopes of getting an answer died down quickly when the two of you met Natasha, Bruce and Clint by the bar. Clint, by the other side of the bar, immediately went in for a high-five with you before pulling out the bottle of champagne Tony opened earlier on. "Why is Steve incredibly under-dressed next to such lady?"

"Heard he's not the Captain anymore." Natasha chimed in, earning a laugh from the group as you nodded.

"Oh, yeah! Much more fun, working with Captain Hill." you purred, basking in the warmth Steve's hand on your waist provided. "Wonder where she is.."

"She's busy being given a headache by Tony," Natasha replied right after Clint handed the two glasses to Steve and you, earning a timid smile from you before you took a generous sip, letting the liquid burn down all the way through your throat. "The two of you by the door might've made me question my sexuality a little bit."

"Alright, can everyone just stop trying to bed my girlfriend?"

"Bed me? Oh my God, you're actually back in the 40's," you laughed, with Steve playfully rolling his eyes and tugging you closer to his side. "Might as well ask me to dance Waltz with you to Doja Cat."

"I might, actually-" but you cut him off with a quick kiss to his lips, before slowly stepping away from him with a wink, still holding onto your glass.

"That's too bad, a Star Spangled Singer only dances with Captain America herself!"

"I'm starting to get used to this thing," Maria twirled you around again, earning a hearty laugh from you when you nodded and did the same to her.

"You look badass in it. You should take on the name, seriously."

"Only if you agree to be my sidekick. But in that outfit."

"I don't think I could fight in high heels and a skirt-"

"You don't have to," she chuckled, shaking her head. "Just give me a thumbs up when I do good and sit pretty, that'd be good."

You laughed along, pulling her to your side tiredly when the music changed again. "I actually considered coming as Captain America's shield but then Steve pulled this out, so…"

"Steve was the one pulling this out?" she asked, giggling. "He knew what he was getting himself into, then."

"Mhm. Speaking of…" you trailed off, slowly pushing yourself apart from her embrace and reaching to fix her hair before smiling again. "I should find him. I kind of deserted him for you, hotshot."

"Best choice you've ever made." she chuckled and squeezed your hand one last time. "Have fun, m'kay?"

"You too." you hummed before walking away from her happily, eyes scanning through the room as you made your way over to the bar again. A squeak left you when you felt a strong pair of arms wrap around your waist, pulling you close to his chest with a laugh. "Steve! You scared me."

"And you, miss, haven't answered my question." he spoke, right against your ear. You let out a soft chuckle at that. "What's under the outfit?"

"My endless love and adoration for a certain Steve Rogers." you replied seriously, causing him to laugh and hide his face on your neck. "For real. I got a Captain America trading card in my bra and that's like, all."

"I thought you meant something like, I don't know, a very patriotic lingerie set or…"

"Please don't bring politics into our bedroom," you chuckled, slowly turning around in his hold to wrap your arms around his neck and smile up to him. "I was messin' with you. Wanted to rile you up solely for my own amusement."

"Left your manners on the nightstand?"

"Exactly." you hummed, letting him pull you closer just to press his lips against the side of your forehead.

"Well, there's always the fourth of July for that, I hope." he shrugged, and you really wanted to just kiss him until his poor lungs went dry. "Say, what does one do with their girlfriend on a Halloween night?"

"Horror movies are on the table," you mumbled. "We'll steal beer from the kitchen- and of course, the candies Tony insisted on buying to give to trick-or-treaters as if any child ever comes around here."

"Sounds like a deal. But you'll keep the outfit on, right?"

"Only if you're gonna be the one to take it off when I'm too sleepy to do so."

You could still hear the music through the thick walls of the compound, although a lot more muffled. Your chest was against Steve's back as the two of you cuddled up on the bed, a low-budget horror movie from early 2000's on your TV while you absentmindedly played with his fingers, massaging his palm with your thumbs mostly to ignore the logical explanations he came up with for whatever demon was after the characters. "Stevie?" you looked up a bit, earning a hum from him.

"Yeah?"

You let your head fall back on his chest and closed your eyes, a smile forming on your lips. "You're my favorite Captain America, you know that, right? Even though Maria is a close second."

He laughed at that, arms wrapping around you a bit tighter before he left a kiss on your hair. "I know. And you're my favorite Star Spangled Singer."

"You'd lose your virginity to me in the 40's too?"

"Christ- who even told you about that?"

#steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x you #steve rogers x y/n #steve rogers fic #steve rogers blurb #steve rogers drabble #steve rogers oneshot #steve rogers fluff #steve rogers smut #marvel fic #marvel x reader #marvel fluff #captain america x reader #steve rogers

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teenandbeyond · 2 years

Note

hi!! this is my first time requesting in awhile and it might be a little specific? 😭 so thank you if you do it and its fine if not

anyways the request: so can i get a bakugou x reader maybe? (or kirishima if u dont want to write for him). reader dislocated their shoulder (dominant hand so they cant do anything) and is now on bed rest?? idk i just want comfort bc my shoulder has dislocated twice in 3 days n i have been struggling big time 💀 im used to doing things by myself and not asking for help 24/7

i hope this is coherent 😭

Bakugo x Injured. Reader

This is super late, huh? Hope despite that it still brings some type of comfort.

Want more from me? Masterlist 2

☆*: .｡. .｡.:*☆☆*: .｡. .｡.:*☆

💥Let Me💥 (MHA or My Hero Academia)

Warning(s): Cursing(But it's Bakugo, sooo), Fluff

Bakugo refuses to let you do anything by yourself in this state

✨✨✨✨

“What the hell are you doing?” you heard a familiar voice growl.

You turned like a deer in headlights, “Uh, um…I’m…praising the cabinets?”

Your friend and crush--but he didn’t need to know that--raised a blonde brow, “Praising the cabinets.”

“Yes! I’m very religious with them, they store our wonderful plates—”

“Stop with that bull crap, why are you up? You’re on bed rest.”

“It was boring. I'd just sit around all day and do nothing.”

He scoffed, gently nudging you out of the way, “Do you not understand what bed rest means, dumbass? You’re not supposed to be getting up, you’re supposed to be resting.”

“I know, Bakugo…I’m just…used to doing everything for myself, not being so helpless,” you sighed.

His shoulders dropped in a silent sigh, “Yeah, I get it. But you’d be an idiot to make it worse and never get better. School without you is boring, so you gotta get back as soon as possible.”

He groaned as soon as he saw the shit-eating grin on your face, distracting himself with continuing the meal you were making.

“You miss me, huh?”

“I don’t fucking miss you! You’re just one of the few people who can keep up with me!”

“That sounds like ‘missing’ to me.”

“Shut up!” he barked.

“Why are you here alone? Isn’t school over?”

He shrugged, “It is, everyone but me got punished. They have to stay an extra hour to train.”

“I’m guessing you passed the test because you’re way better than everyone else?” you rolled your eyes.

“Exactly. Yeah.”

With a huff, you shake your head.

“Cocky-ass.”

“Go lay down, why are you still here, nerd?”

“I’m watching you. It’s not often you get to see Bakugo Katsuki cook,” you grinned.

He turned to you with the darkest glare you’ve ever seen on him, “I swear if I have to tell you one more fucking time to lay down.”

“Fine! Fine!” with a pout, you make it to your room.

Thirty minutes later he comes in with a plate, setting it on the nightstand next to your bed.

“How in the world did you hold a steaming plate with your bare hand?” you blink in awe.

He actually chuckled at that, “I have explosions come out of my hands on a regular basis, I think I can handle a little plate, [N/N].”

“You and your nicknames,” you reach out to take the chopsticks.

“What are you doing? You’re not gonna be able to eat without your dominant hand. You can barely use the other one.”

You shrug, “Yeah, I’ve been trying to learn and use the other side so I can do more.”

You yelp as you drop the chopsticks you were awkwardly holding.

“How’s that goin’ for you?”

“Shut up! I have to figure something out, I’m hungry.”

“I…you,” he muttered under his breath, his cheeks flushing a little.

“What was that? You’re loud any other time,” your inquire with furrowed brows.

“I can feed you…”

“…”

“Oi! Don’t laugh!”

You stifle the laugh, “Well, I can’t laugh too hard anyway.”

“I just don’t want to sit and watch you complain about stuff.”

“Thanks, but it’s okay, I got it.”

Then you proceed to hiss as you trigger your shoulder.

“Do you, now?” a smirk twitched onto his face.

“Fine.”

You found yourself getting flustered as he fed you, surprised by how calm and gentle he was.

“Don’t swallow too fast, idiot! It’s not a race!”

In between eating, if you needed anything, he’d grab it for you.

“You know Bakugo, you’d be a good boyfriend,” you told him honestly.

“H-Huh?”

“You’re very caring--more than what it seems, anyway.”

His eyes flickered down to the plate to grab more food, “I’m not caring…you just…look so pathetic trying to do so much when you’re supposed to rest…I don’t want you to hold the class back by prolonging your injury.”

Considering how many pauses were in that sentence, you didn’t really believe his reasoning.

“It’s okay, thank you for caring about me.”

He growled leaning toward you, “I just told you—”

You kiss his cheek out of gratitude, “--Just take the thank you, Bakugo.”

Startled he pulls away, face darkening in color, “I—You—Dumbass! Don’t do things like that so suddenly!”

You hear a knock at your door, “Hey, [Name]! We’re all back now! Let me know if you need anything, okay?”

You smile, “Thanks, Eiji! But Bakugo’s been helping me, so I don’t need anything right now!—You can come in, I don’t bite, you know!”

Once Kirishima enters, he looks in between you and Bakugo, seemingly putting pieces together.

Then he gives Bakugo a look that you don’t understand.

“Shut up, Shitty Hair!”

He chuckles, not able to hide his smirk, “Hm? But I didn’t say anything, Baku-bro.”

“You know exactly what I’m talking about!”

“No, what are you talking about?”

“Stop playing innocent!”

You smile, warmed by their banter.

“That looks good, can I take a bit, [Name]?”

“No! That’s just for [Name], you don’t get any, Kirishima!”

You pout, “Aw, why can’t he get any, Bakugo? He only wants a bite.”

“T-that’s because…Shut up!”

“We didn’t say anything…”

#katsuki bakugo x reader #bakugo #bakugo fluff #bakugo katsuki #bakugo x you #bakugo comfort #anime #bnha #mha #bnha x reader #mha x reader

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sri-rachaa · 2 years

Text

Sam and Lovely sibling HC fluff, Sick edition

Lovely being down with an awful bout of a stomach bug while Vincents out, not knowing who else to text in the wee hours of the morning besides their, conveniently nocturnal, older brother.

tw: references to throwing up

‘🐥: hey sammy, you have healing background. what do you do for nausea and uh…yknow. that gross thing that follows nausea’

Well that’s a text to wake up too.

Sam grabbed his phone in the midst of his half-asleep state, the deep big brother instinct sending a small shock of adrenaline through his system-

‘Are you alright?!’

‘🐥: yeah, I’m just a lil sick, no worries :) just uh…what should I do here’

Sam scoffed. His sibling and their tendency to horribly under dramatize, well, anything.

‘I’m coming over.’

‘🐥: no really it’s ok you don’t have too! I can handle it!!’’

‘Im sure you can, I’m still coming over’

‘🐥 is typing…’

Sam didn’t let them finish their last text. He knows how they are, they would rather sit in their own suffering then ask anyone to help them give some relief- almost like it’s rude to even ask.

He hates it. He understands it, but god does he hate it.

He quickly got out of bed and threw the closest clothes he had on, grabbing the Chevy keys off the key ring and walking out the door.

Lovely groaned.

Currently, they were sitting against their bed frame hunched over in balled up position clutching their stomach. This was a nice setting change for them from the last two hours, where they were stuck in the bathroom with their head hovering over the toilet bowl. Squirming as their nausea shifted, In their head they went over everything they did and ate in the last two days- trying to figure out what threw their whole body into a purge;

The sound of the door opening throwing them out of their montage.

Sam

They groaned again. They didn’t want to sound needy, they hate sounding needy, but there was undeniably a large part of them that was flooded with relief with the thought of him being here.

Between the sound of the door closing, keys hitting the counter, and a millisecond *Fwosh-!* he was crouching over their bedside.

“Damn, Missy…you look awful.” Their older brother said, moving the sweat drenched hair strands out of their pale face.

“Thanks, Sammy, but it really ain’t that ba-“

“Hush. Don’t you start.”

Dammit.

“Sam, Really I swear it’s not- woah god-” Another wave of nausea paused their empty defense, Lovely frantically throwing the covers off about to take off into the bathroom for what felt like the hundredth time tonight-

Stopping when they suddenly felt a hand hold them down from their stomach.

“Sam-“They clawed at him, “Stop- im gonna get sick”

“Hold on.”

“Samuel I’m not fucking with you let g-”

A wave of relief washed over them, all nausea wiping away to nothing.

Lovely steadied themselves.

“…wha-“

They looked down to Sam’s hand still resting on their lower abdomen, the light blue iridescent glow surrounding his hand.

Healing magic.

“Feel better?”

They nodded, weakly leaning back into the pillow behind them.

Lovely silently sat in that position for a moment or two, bathing in the feeling of normal again, until a realization hit them-

“Wait, Sam, hold on- that’s too much magic- you could pass out-“

He finished the magic before they could even finish their statement, slightly wobbling and wincing after leaning back up.

Yeah, It took it out of him alright. He buckled under his own weight, leaning back forward-

Lovely grabbed his arm before he could lose his balance- pulling him onto the bed and helping lay him down, Sam’s breath hitching as he hit the mattress.

Good news? He’s still conscious, at least.

Lovely flicked him on the forehead.

“Ow, th’ hell was that for?”

“Why’d you do that.”

“Do what? Help you feel better-“

“And damn near make yourself pass out doing it!! If I knew you would’ve done that, I wouldn’t texted you in the first place-“

“Missy.”

“I mean, it was a little nausea, I could’ve handled it myself-“

“Missy.”

“I mean seriously Sam, why would you-“

Sam grabbed their arm and shoved them into the bed, pulling them into a pseudo hug- cutting off their worried tangent.

Lovely let out a disapproving groan into his shoulder, where they were being held down into.

“If I couldn’t’ve handled it,” Sam started, “Then I wouldn’t’ve done it in the first place. Plus, I’m not gonna sit here and watch as your hunched over feelin like shit.”

Lovely pushed to get up and retort, Sam pushing them back down.

“No. Just stay down n’ hush. I love you, Missy. You’re my baby sibling, and as much as you hate it, I’m gonna help you- no matter what.”

Lovely fell silent.

They laid there for almost a couple of minutes before Sam called it safe to take his hand off of their head, Lovey barely adjusting to just lay the side of their face onto his shoulder.

“…..thank you, Sammy.” They mumbled, “I love you too.”

#rae attempting to write the musical the series #btw lovelys name is sams phone is just ‘🐥’#because he’s nickname for them when they were a baby was ‘lil ducklin’#:))#redacted asmr #southern siblings au #redacted audio

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equallyshaw · 2 years

Text

𝓪𝓵𝓵 𝓲 𝔀𝓪𝓷𝓽. - 𝓺𝓾𝓲𝓷𝓷 𝓱𝓾𝓰𝓱𝓮𝓼.

Inspire by miss o. rodrigos: all I want.

pt 2 to brutal:

Sour Masterlist:

you don't have to read that part, BUT it might clear some things up. but i also might do a 3rd part since, the ending is a cliffhanger not gonna lie lol

Warnings: swearing. actions aluding to sex.

Word Count:

I found a guy, told me I was a star

He held the door, held my hand in the dark

And he's perfect on paper but he's lying to my face

Does he think that I'm the kinda girl who needs to be saved?

After 2 months of going back and fourth with Quinn, and trying to figure out his feelings, I got nowwhere. I even brought in Ellen to help with the situation, but again- nothing. He was like me in a lot of ways, quiet, broody, impeccably stubborn and again- broody. Ellen couldn't get it out of him, hell I even bribed Luke with $100 in chipotle money to help me out, but nothing worked. I got sick and tired of waiting around, even after we 'fixed' our friendship. So I completly moved on with my life, moving from Plymoth to Chicago and started a new job within the summer. It was now october, and between last July to to now, I had found somebody who actually was all in.

I was on my way home from a late night at work, having been sucked into after work drinks, I called for the door of my apartment to be held open, instead of trying to grab my key. The stranger obliged, and he introduced himself to me on the elevator up. I then saw him again, a few days later grabbing a coffee from the lobby. I smiled at him, grabbing my own and he asked me to take the coffee to the rooftop, and I accepted.

And god, he is perfect. He was doing everything right. He was kind, a gentleman, sweet, funny, not afraid to show his emotions, and overall pefect. He wasn't afraid to show who he was, he was honest. Such a drastice differance from Quinn and the guy I had previously dated. Trevor was everything I was looking for in a guy and somehow got extremely lucky. And for once, I have somebody 'normal' in my life. Who has a set fucking schedule, and can make plans for two weeks out.

Now it was October, and I kinda have a funny feeling about him.

"I think he's talking behind my back." I confessed to a friend who I met through work. She froze, looked over and gave me her full and undivited attention. "I think he might be atleast just acting shady. Like, when he first met me I was a different person. Trying to get over Quinn once and for all, and having those three months were blissful. And like, when he met me I was almost over him. And now, I don't see Trevor as like a filler if you wanna call it that. I see him differently now, but I think he thinks im still fragile? Like im depressed and like ill always be depressed, but not that depressed. Y'know? He's perfect, but im not a damsel in distress. I don't need to be saved, by a guy no less. Quinn knew that, he didn't push me. Especially in our last conversation." I confessed and she nodded, comforting me. "I just want a good guy, somebody to love me unconditionally. somebody to always be there for me, and like I should be enough for myself. but somedays I don't think I am." I added and she wrapped her arms around me. Quinn reminded me in our last conversation, that I needed to be there for myself above all else.

[March 31st.]

"Are-are you leaving?" Quinn questioned walking into my air bnb. I had been staying in Vancouver since the end of Olympics pretty much. I had only spent five days in Detroit before heading up here. I was happy to be leaving, especially to leave the ever confusing Quinn Hughes. "Hmm mmm." I responded, shutting my suitcase. "Were you gonna tell me or just leave?" He questioned coming over to the bed, grabbing my hands to stop me from moving. This is the first time in years, he had held my hands like this. I froze, looking down at them and then back up to him. He let them go, and I sighed walking back out into the living room. He followed suit, and we sat on the couch across from one another. "I need to leave. I can't keep doing this. I need to move on with my life, Im leaving for Chicago." I confessed and he moved forward, trying to study me. "Can't keep doing what?" He asked, confused. I shook my head, "Quinn, if you hadn't noticed I've changed my flight three times since getting here. I have stayed, because I wanted to be around you. I wanted to be with you. Yet, you are still the ever confusing Quinn Hughes I fell for all those years ago. So with that, I just have to leave." I exclaimed. He looked at the floor, and I could see the gears turning a mile a minute. Trying to process what I had said and everything that had gone on this past month. I sniffled back some tears, and he whipped his head up to face me. He looked at me with a thoughtful look. "God, I really need to go." I said standing up. "Wait." He said softly grabbing my hand, and I turned back towards him. "I have to go Quinn, I need to be on my own for awhile. I need to find myself, and love myself away from skating." I said looking at the ground, before looking at him. He fought back tears, his jaw tighenting as he pushed some hair back behind my ear. His hazel eyes (i cant find his eye color lol) twinkling as I look at him, "Im sorry that Ive been distant this past month. I get it, and yes- I did see the way you acted, and I am sorry that I didn't show or tell you how I felt. But. I do think that you should figure out who you are away from the sport. I want you to learn to forgive yourself from regret and mistakes you think you made. I want you to learn to love yourself, more than ever, you need to. You need to be there for yourself, ok?" he questioned bring his hands to my face and I nodded, barely holding on to the tears that were going to pool out any second. He nodded, before pulling me in for a hug. I needed to leave.

[October]

I sat on the edge of my bed, debating if I wanted to even go to dinner with my friends. It was a much needed, fancy ass treat for us corporate gals. I sighed, pushing my brunette hair behind my shoulders and walking out to grab my bag. I walked out of my apartment, not before straighening my black dress that curved in the perfect spots, with black stilletos. My makeup and hair were done the way I loved it, so much different than competition makeup. I walked out, stopping by my boyfriends apartment on the ride down, to say goodnight. I knocked, waiting patiently for him to open the door. He opened it, smiling and pulling me inside. "Woah, you look gorgeous." he said taking my whole outfit in. I nodded, blushing. "Thankyou, Trev." I mused, giving him a quick peck. "Ill see you tomorrow morning, for brunch ok?" I said and he nodded, waving me off. "Be safe, let me know when you get home." He yelled as I walked out, while confirming I would.

I pulled up the the valet on the chicago river, thanking the valet as I walked past. I headed into the greek restaurant, my favorite, and made my way to the bar. The hostess nodding as I walked past, and then hearing, "How does she get to walk in? She's literally a nobody." I froze, walking back to the hostess and slipped her a twenty, for her troubles. I shook my head, and continued towards the bar and saw the familiar bartender and she nodded, already starting my drink. Let's just I come here a lot, and they know me pretty well now. Besides, I did tip very well when I did.

"Y/N!!!!" I heard behind me, and I smiled turning around to my friends. We all hugged, before they motioned towards our usual table and I nodded grabbing my martini and following them. We sat down, not bothering with the menus and started talking about our week. The four of us work for different companies and brands, so we understand one another for the most part but since we work in different fields, we always enjoy catching up with one another. It was nice for once, being able to be still and not have to worry about what I nedded to do next and what not.

"Okay, who the hell is staring at you?" Bella said pointing past me, as I sipped on my drink. I turned around in my seat, being so non chalant and quite frankly not caring. I noticed a tall blonde and cringed, that was elias. I internally yelled fuck, and moved on to who was staring at me. motherfucker Quinn. I swallowed, sighed and turned back around. "Do you know him?" Bella questioned and I nodded. "He's my ex from michigan who also happens to play in the nhl." I said swinging back the rest of my martini and taking in the bitterness. "Im getting something else, you need anything?" I questioned the girls and they shook the head no. I nodded, standing up and walking over towards the bar again. I smiled, asking for straight gin on ice. I sighed looking at the bar, and cursing the universe. I really didn't want to see him tonight. I began to walk back towards the bar, keeping my head looking straight on. Not wanting to see him or anybody in that group. Especially the dude, that made fuss about me walking in straight to the bar.

All I want is love that lasts

Is all I want too much to ask?

All I want is a good guy

Are my expectations far too high?

All I have is myself at the end of the day

But shouldn't that be enough for me?

I sat back down, digging into the veggie and hummus plate. "Ordererd you usual." Rosa confirmed, and I nodded thankfully. "So what's going in with you and Trev? The text you sent in the group chat, seemed off. Like unlike him." Alicia questioned, and I sighed. I sat back in my chair a bit, and shrugged. "I was explaining to my coworker Nina about it yesterday. Like, when he first met me- I was SO close to getting over Quinn for once and for all and so he saw me when I wasn't at my highest like I am now and he doesn't realize I am not as fragile as I was before. Well, not fragile but you know what I mean." I rambled, sipping some more of my drink. "But he seems so sweet! But like also, you aren't a damsel in distress. He shouldn't be at your beck and call like that, well he should be because your you but you know what I mean." Rosa respondeded and I nodded. "Like he's perfect on paper, but I don't need to be saved. I've already saved myself."

And there's one more boy, he's from my past

We fell in love but it didn't last

'Cause the second I figure it out he pushes me away

And I won't fight for love if you won't meet me halfway

A little while later, we were back on me and my love life. "But seriously, I just want somebody that fits me and who I am. I don't want to be one foot in and one foot out. I want to be sure. And no I was never like that with my last boyfriend after Quinn. I didn't even wanna move in with him after three years. Am I aiming for something too high. Am I asking too much out of somebody or expecting too much?" I confessed, running a hand through my hair and sipping my drink. "NO!" Alicia said first, "No, you are not expecting too much. Don't you dare feel like you have to settle for somebody. Settle for somebody that isn't Quinn." She said, peeking at the other girl's reactions. She was right. I shook my head, sighing. "I can't have him, he's probably not available anymore. When I went for the weekend to my parents, they said that they had seen an extra girl hanging around the family when they went to the lake. They looked cute apparently, and like I can't hold out hope for him. Not anymore." I winced. Rosa shook her head, "But didn't he wait for you? Like didn't he not move on?" She questioned and I nodded. "But we aren't getting any younger, so he's probably moved on. Which is a good thing. We didn't stay together for a reason, who knows if we were just too young to keep it going or that he wasn't into me as I was. I can't fight for somebody who doesn't want it all. That one month with him, doesn't change anything. I won't fight for somebody who doesn't meet me in the middle. Who doesn't put in the energy or time or fucking words." I said, quite frankly done with the conversation. "Well, here's to us and our single lives forever!" Bella beamed clinking our glasses together. Shouldn't that be enough? Why do I have a heavy feeling in my stomach?

All of us headed out towards the valet, with mine coming up first. "Ill text you guys tomorrow for next week." I mused, handing money to the valet. I thanked them, and hopped in my car. I waited a second to pull out, because people were walking in front of me. I sighed, staring straight at them, hoping they would hurry up. I watched them as they finally moved past my car, and I drove off. My music started as I pulled off, heading back into the city. I decided I wanted to drive on lakeshore, so I made my way around the city so I could go past Navy Pier, heading back into the gold coast area.

God, seeing Quinn tonight has messed with my head. I couldn't stop thinking about him throughout dinner, honestly getting lost in my thoughts.Thoroughly, just sitting back at dinner and not saying much. The girls knew that seeing him, rattled me, I had explained to them a few months back when we all met at a Pilates class, about somebody from Michigan- never explicity saying his name, and how much he affected me. Constantly thinking over and over, what I did wrong, what he did wrong, and everyhting afterwards. We were just simply, young and dumb. But, the ever brooding man just couldn't escape my mind.

My phone dinged, signaling that somebody had texted me.

[Q: sorry didnt mean to stare at you. didn't know u were there till brock pointed you out. apparently he didn't recgonize you when you first walked in.]

[y/n: yep. called me a nobody which is fine, but the fucking entitlement to speak to a hostess like that was uncalled for.]

[Q: oh i know, as soon as i heard about that i def game him an earful. ]

[y/n: oh good. because, ellen would not enjoy hearing that you didn't do anything or that you contributed to it.]

[Q: oh god, dont remind me. but anywho, did you possibly want to meet up rn? i still have sometime before curfew...]

I sighed, bitting my lip. My finers strumming against the steering wheel as I drove past the lake, not taking in the view at all. Fuck, I wanted to see him.

[y/n: yeah, how about the soho house? we can speak in private.]

[Q: ill meet you there.]

I turned off the drive and made my way into the city, towards the west loop near the united center. As soon as I arrived, I pulled into the valet and headed inside grabbing a corner seat.

I sat down, rubbing my hands on my thighs, trying to brush away some guilt and anxiety. Stop, nothing more than friends seeing one another. Just for an hour, and then ill be in my bed. I got up, walking over towards the bar/coffee bar and ordering a decaf expresso. I'd need it.

Quinn walked in, looking around and looked adorable, looking at the somewhat bare cafe. I smiled, throwing him a hand as I walked back to my seat. Expresso in hand. "Hi." I said sitting down across from him. He smiled softly, as a waiter came over. "Ill have a decaf too." he said and the waiter went away.

Quinn stared at my hands, waiting for one of us to say something. I chuckled softly, rubbing my eyes. "How have you been Quinn? How is the season going so far?" I questioned sipping my drink. "It's good. I think this year will be good. And i've been doing great. Things have been looking up, you?" He questioned setting his drink down on the saucer. I nodded, "Its been great too. I love it here, I love my job, my group of girls. It's been amazing thus far. Ive even visted it my parents more than once." I mused and he smiled. "So you paid a visit to cruella huh?" He joked and I gigged. "Yes! I made sure to keep any and all dogs out of sight." I grinned, placing my cup to my lips before sipping. "Can I ask you a question, Q?" I questioned, gaging his response. He nodded unsurely, "Did you feel like coming after me? After I left? Did you have any doubt about how we left things?" I asked, unsure of the answer.

And I miss the days

When I was young and naive

He looked down at the table, before speaking. "I did. But, I knew you deserved better so I let you go. I knew that you needed to be here, and have a life away from skating, away from team usa, away from me. For once in your life." He stated. I shook my head, god I hate this boy sometimes. "What?" He questioned, softly grabbing my hand. I looked back up towards him, "How could you have been so blind? How didn't you see that you were everything I wanted back in 2018 and now? Why didn't you come after me or fight for me? Why didn't you protect me? Don't sit here and say for one minute that I need a life away from you and everyhting. When I already have! I've been living my life away from you, while I have been begging the universe to have you back in my life. I wanted you then, and I want you more than ever now. So don't say you weren't good for me, you were." I rasped, pulling my hand away. He could see the tears forming in my eyes and drew a shaky breath. "But we were young-" I cut him off, "Yes. We were young and naive. God, I miss those days when everyhting was new and sudden and innocent. Because, atleast I had you." I rasped, sitting up and grabbing my bag. By now the whole room had cleared, plus the bartender. Quinn grabbed my arm softly, to stop me. I looked down at it, before looking up at him.

He was now standing in front of me, and all I wanted to do was grab ahold of him in fear, he would disappear.

"I miss those days too, more than you know." he softly spoke, before doing what I had wanted him to do for so long. He kissed me with urgency, bringing us closer together. I wrapper my arms around his neck and smiled into it. I wanted him, and only him.

We broke apart, gathering our breaths. "I don't want you to leave." I murmured. He hummed in agreemant, before taking my hand and walking us out into the hotel lobby. "Wait - what are you doing?" I asked Quinn as he walked us up to the front desk. "Good evening, can we get a room for two for tonight?" Quinn asked, and the front desk lady could tell I was confused. She smiled softly, reaching for a room key and Quinn settled the rest.

We took the elevator up, not being able to be more than six feet apart. He kissed my neck, causing me to giggle. "Woah there huggy, how much did you have to drink?" I grinned, pulling him off the elevator and to our room.

We walked into our room, immediately pulling off our shoes and his jacket. I paused for a second, pulling at my zipper, which started coming undone instantly. I then felt his warm hands, move my hand so he could pull it the rest of the way down. Hands softly pulled my dress off, and I stepped out of it. I turned around and grinned, unbuttoning his dress shirt as he worked on his pants. We were two teenagers in love. Running from the wolves. High on adrenaline, alcohol and the act of sneaking around.

He pulled me in, walking us back towards the bed and I giggled as he pushed us onto it. I turned over onto my side, so I could straddle him. I placed my hands on his chest, and held them there for a second to take in this moment. This moment, we had been waiting for for years. It was actually happening again.

"You ok?" He asked tracing a soft hand on my thigh, making me feel even more comfortable. I nodded smiling, before reconnecting our lips.

It was the following morning, as I laid in the hotel room alone, where I couldn't help but feel on cloud 9. Quinn had left an hour after we slept together, and he told me to keep the room for the night. He told me that he wanted to see me again before he left this afternoon, but I wasn't sure with my brunch plans, if that would work. If not, I told him i'd be in Michigan when the Canucks came to play Detroit, becauseI know Ellen would hate for me to miss it. He smiled, giving me many kisses before he went off into the night.

I wanted all of it. I wanted him, share his life's biggest moments, his life up in Vancouver. I wanted everything with him, and from what he said last night after everything, made it seem like he wanted me there too. He wanted me, again- as if he never wanted me. He promised, me this time he would communicate more, he would show me that he wanted me and he would defend me when the situation presented itself. He wouldn't leave me high and dry.

But I know every chapter must end, for a new one to begin. Yet, this life is so unpredicatable. This story that I have created, is not perfect, and it never will be. But I know, that the best is yet to come. I can close my eyes, and see the life I want and the best part of my story is about to begin. The thrill that is new, exciting and going to take my breath away. You never know.

KIND of alluding to Oliva Rodrigos latest song from her disney show: You Never Know. buttttttt. I hope you guys enjoyed, please reblog and like. :)

Some tags: @cuttergauth @hugheshugs @jayda12

#Quinn hughes #Quinn Hughes x au #Quinn Hughes fic #Quinn hughes blurb #Quinn Hughes imagine #nhl #hockey #nhl imagine #hockey imagine #nhl blurb #hockey blurb #sour hockey imagines

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mylandofdarkness · 29 days

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The Antagonist of My Life. My Mother.

My mother.. played a HUGE role in my life....

Now don't get me wrong.. things are better between me and her now but with my first 22 years of my life. she's given me hell. I never understood it till later that it was simply because Girls get it more rough than boys. Growing up I NEVER saw my mom lay a finger on him for anything. Instead every single thing I did.. where I was simply just a child THAT DOESNT KNOW ANYTHING... gets a bunch of beatings that she's gonna remember for the rest of her life. I remember crying so much, I remember hiding under a table, hovering in a corner while STILL getting slapped and beaten by my mother.. as I have a meltdown, I even locked myself in the bathroom for 20 minutes. My father had no role.. he wasn't able to do anything . So I'm just backed up in a corner getting hit as my father and brother sit on the side and watch. Like that's not traumatizing? for a Mother to stand there and beat and beat and beat her YOUNG child, daughter that is probably around 6-7 years old.. as she is screaming in pain from getting beaten. what kind of a mother does that. Does this child not have feelings?? Is this child suppose to not feel the pain? WHAT is this teaching the child? AS A CHILD... I was convinced she didn't want me to be happy, I was convinced she found pleasure in beating me every week, talking down on me, discouraging me, telling me all the things I liked was stupid.

So years go by.. all that abuse did something to me. it turned me into an easily agitated teenager, (Gee I wonder where I got that from). And I wasn't going to be those kids that commit suicide because of strict parents or being under pressure. So I got tired from my moms physical abuse one day when I was in mid-high school.

Her abusive hits didn't phase me anymore. Her 'discipline' wasn't going to do shit to me anymore. One Day when she raised her hand at me... I didn't cry, I looked at her dead in the eye... and just walked to my room so I didn't have to hear from her for the rest of the night. Another time where she wanted to give me a word (and a hand) I finally spoke up to her, she was hella surprised. My bro and Dad was surprised too . I said my piece, she told me I was making excuses. I told her it wasn't excuse. I wasn't going to easily back down. I wasn't going to give her that satisfaction of ME keeping quiet and crying, and having it end up being a meltdown. I wasn't going to let her be the only crazy one now. She created one... That's on her... And I want her to remember what she started and what she created.

So you see... Because of her I somehow always see the negative in most friendships I make. because I was treated so poorly when I was little, everytime I meet somebody I want to befriend, I would have higher expectations and always oversee a small negative . My mother never taught me how to treat others.. she taught me nothing but pain.

So fast forward to college.. I LIVED AWAY for college.. and it was the greatest 3 years ever. why? cause I was actually away from that toxic household and I was actually able to do what I want on my own. Met lots of cool people, partied, went out, talked to some boys, Figured myself out lots. College was done, I move back.. and yes everything was tense again. Keep in mind I went towards the Media Arts career path.. My mother thought that was a joke. So when it came to finding jobs.... she pestered me LOTS about it and it stressed me out a lot. pressured me into applying for jobs that I didn't find suited for myself. Now yes this is a different stage of my life.. They made me anxious on even finding a job. My mother made me feel like shit. This is where emotional and mental abuse comes in more. and when I finally landed a job at a well known company..

Things switched. I was suddenly the daughter they were proud of o.0 I'm the daughter that works at 'This place' WoW Im the daughter that's going to make a lot of money from this place. ...... That gave my phony vibes. Now that I'm making decent money.. your nice to me?? Now that other companies see my potential, you suddenly see it too?? Nah, you shattered my spirit for 22 years. You've emotionally and mentally brought me down almost everyday for 23 years. I'm not getting my years back.

Because of all this... a part of me resents her for how I ended up as a person. Every moment of hell she gave me, I remember it vividly.

#toxicmother #toxic parents #trauma #life lessons

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leaffiii · 1 year

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Hi, sorry for waiting, i have a little headache

- Snake man and Gemini man have a little agreement between them. Mostly all they do is trying to investigate who was Gemini before he ended up activating all alone in Archive Sector 019. I honestly believe that ether Gemini has no memory at all or that he has only handful of fragments but nothing more.

- Gemini provides cover for Snake with holograms and Snake is the one to search for clues. Maybe Gemini himself is distracting guards, saying that he was curious about tours that will be there or just with pep talk, while Snake trying to search for something thats worth to look at.

- Sometimes Gemini asks Snake to search for some "dirt" about some people. But they aren't trying to investigate who is Mega Man, since if he will find out about this beforehand, it will be a lot of trouble with him, trying to figure out they're goal or just straight up fighting them.

- Gemini is actually weak to Search Snakes. In a sense that he finds them very, very adorable and useful. It's a big part of the reason why he chose Snake man to begin with.

- Search Snakes have mind of they're own, they are not just some modified security cameras. But they can be plugged in Snake to share information they have with him. Same with Aki too. (Imagine Mega Mini riding it, or having it in Aki's head, saying "get out, you are an outdoor snake!")

- Snake just thinks that Gemini is afraid of them, because he sees him looking at them a lot, but trying at all costs not to interact with them (Gemini DROWNS that urge to snuggle with them, he simply can't be seen acting like this)

- Gemini may or may not had intrusive thoughts about stealing Search Snakes after his deal with Snake man will be over. These thoughts might go away if he'd received some more character development because of Snake.

Thanks for listening to my rattle of an insane man, have some sketches

Oh my GOSH I am slurping these up like soup- let me try and reply to most of these because hrngnrng the brainrot is real and these are so cute

I currently consider most of the backstories spoilers, since I want to do more comics for the AU as a whole (For example, story-wise almost no one knows where Gemini came from. DZN-001 did end up disappearing from the archive a while before Gemini showed up in Silicon City though...). I'm glad i was able to spark theorization hehe >:].

But yeah! They do have a sort of "agreement", with Snake ending up working more closely with Gemini (Mainly since they work well together and get along pretty well), but there ARE others involved ;)

OOOH definitely. They both know a lot more than they let on, specific people of interest to them are notable figures from the Hard War, like Sgt. Night, but the reasons behind it are spoilery (oops)

OH MY GOD IM. That's so god dang cute, that's definitely being canonized oh my lordy

THE REST OF THE HCS TOO... i made the search snakes the little guys of all time, i should've expected this hrngnnrg /pos

I can't convey to you the sheer joy I get from seeing your art of them like.. i treasure all the fanart i get but these invoke so much positive emotions to me it's INSANE. It's . Thanmk you so much hhrnngng :]

Once I get the final two or three more planned robots designed, I'm gonna try and kick myself into story/backstory mode (or at least give them some profiles at least lol) so stay tuned ehehe :]

#fc!gemini man #fc!snake man #mega man #other's art #mmfc #mega man fully charged #leafy speaks #megaman #mmfc au #and yknow what #lets get a tag for the little guys too #search snakes #croc pop #other's headcanons

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swampgallows · 1 year

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okay as painful as it is to feel stupid and vulnerable im just gonna post

i really want dragonstomp to happen. ive poured dozens of hours into trying to make it happen already, between fireworks and making the flyer and trying to figure out my set and listening literally hundreds of records trying to find new tracks to play and i feel like it's all for naught. there is no worse imaginable feeling in the world to me than throwing a party and having nobody come. it's the ultimate coalescence of being ghosted/abandoned/ignored, failing at something, and being disliked. like you put all this work into something where the objective is just for people to have fun, and they would rather do something else than have fun with you. throwing a party and having it suck is one thing, but having nobody come at all is its own self-contained punishment.

i used to be a very vibrant part of two different communities and now i feel utterly abandoned by both. it's like im "trying to make fetch happen" and everyone is just humoring me. it's been like pulling teeth to get djs because they've all gone back to irl events, which i can't attend because im miss chicken little glass bones and paper skin worwied about a widdle viwus that everyone else "lives with". so here i am alone in my shitty little cloister bedroom trying to at least simulate having fun in a virtual world, which feels beyond pathetic, ESPECIALLY because said virtual world feels vacant of all the people who previously were so passionate about it. dragonflight has been a great expansion but after the legitimate trauma of the last few years it feels like lukewarm water on a burn; the most anyone can feel about it is "lukewarm" because the wounds are so fresh. people are still reeling over sylvanas, afrasiabi, mccree, and blitzchung even still. i feel like it should be a time to celebrate, but so many people have just ditched it for good and moved on. or ive been mean to them or they've been mean to me or they've been mean and shitty and negative in general so ive become splintered off from a ton of people. i don't blame them for not wanting to deal with me but im reaping what ive sown i guess. i don't even want to do the party for me, it's not like it's my birthday, i just want to have an rp event that i actually want to attend. something that isn't "let's pretend to get drunk and then erp in whispers" for 5 hours. since the lore is so fucked anyway i can't imagine an rp rave is that much far off from anything else in game. yeah it's no bonfire bash, but im doing it all myself so this is as good as i can do.

then im at my tables trying to practice, thinking about how ive spent thousands on djing over the years only to have all these records i fucking suck at playing. i didn't even get speakers until like a year ago so ive been djing with a handicap this whole time because i didnt have monitors. and now that i have them, i can't even use them because im such a loser that i still live with my parents, one of which literally doesn't leave the house, so i don't have any time to play from my speakers. everyone in this house gets to use their instrument except me. so i simply don't use it. as a result, i suck at djing. i COULD just spin for the entire night to make up for the 3-4 DJ slots im missing, but that feels completely pathetic too.

on top of everything im really struggling to draw for the flyer because i don't draw anymore (for a lot of the same reasons) and thinking about just what a waste my life is. i got a degree in this shit and i can't even do it right.

im reminded of my therapist agreeing that ive outgrown all this stuff is the main thing; either ive diverged from it or it's gone somewhere i can't follow. all of that is morally neutral. the problem i guess is that i have nothing to move on to, no bigger shell to grow into, so im hermiting in the ones that are cracked and splintered and no longer fit. and when i leave them im adrift, middle of the sea, nothing but darkness in any direction, completely exposed. and i have been drifting a long, long, long time. still there is darkness. still there is no direction.

i didn't want to post anything about this because i know it's shooting myself in the foot and looks like pandering and now itll taint the spirit of the event. but at the same time it already feels tainted, like im struggling to get anybody to care and people only do because they feel bad for me, not because they're actually excited. every single thing i do it feels like im forcing people to come with me or that they just ambivalently tag along. it's like nobody is ever excited about the same things i am. i dont know how to get excited about what everyone else likes. i don't know if it's all in my head or what. all i ever am is in my head because i spend my entire fucking life alone in my bed.

#blathering

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smokeys-house · 2 years

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Can we hear some pirate tales from puukko?

Gonna put this under a cut bc it's a little on the long side! Also pls excuse any formatting issues bc I'm on mobile.

This was super fun to write but I'm rusty so I hope it's a fun read!

Pirate tales from Puukko (1)

You're seated in a comfortable chair by a fireplace. The scent of the rustic cabin's old wood mingles with the smoke and the aroma of hot coffee from the steaming mugs on the coffee table. Across from you sits a familiar older woman, thick fur and a devilish scar across her eye.

"So... pirate tales is what yer after." She leaves her rocking chair at a comfortable pace. "Of course, of course, aye... If that's how you want to spend your evening." She opens a cabinet in the corner, sliding several objects out of the way. A few small bits and bobs clatter to the floor, but she patently ignores them. She reaches far into the back of the cabinet, looking away at nothing and biting her tongue in focus as she fumbles around inside the cupboard. You sip idly at your coffee.

"Aha, here we are!" Her voice is low and gravel-y, but the fondness in her tone is comforting. She sets aside what appears to be a very dusty false panel and sets a very small chest down on the table. Before you can ask what it is she's found, she begins pouring a deep amber liquid from a bottle she pulled from the chest directly into your coffee. "I won't have you waste that. Sup mindfully." Her commanding voice is intimidating, but sweet. She pours noticeably heavier into her own mug.

"I'll be brief. But let me tell you of a day I thought would be my last." She takes a very long sip, and sits back. "Now it may surprise you that at one time I was quite young like yourself. This all happened pretty early on in my piracy days. When ah was a young upstart with a fire in my belly and with my caution very intentionally placed to the wind." She begins to prepare her pipe. She hasn't looked in your direction since she began her story.

"I'd made a rather small name for myself by then. Had no shortage of plunder; trade ships, navy, even other pirates. Another young aspiring 'property reassigner' by the name of Capitan Helio had set his sights on my haul. He weren't an enemy or nothin' he just thought he could show his quality as a sailor by takin' on yours truly. He was a hard young man but not a very wise one, and he hadn't the stones for a killing. Now the style of piracy I'm most known fir was sneakin' on board, alone. My crew would keep the ship at an unthreatening distance, and I'd row on over in the dark of night aboard a tiny little dinghy painted all dark and sneaky like." At this point you notice she's starting to sound a bit different, perhaps a bit piratey. She seems almost excited.

"I'd usually get the capitan up in the middle of the night. Put on airs and act all big and scary in his cabin while he's got his night cap on." She chuckled deeply. "It's where my ship got its name. The Honeyed Word. Sometimes it'd go sour and things would get more... well let's say it's less family friendly. Anyway ol Sunny knew that's what I got up to. An' he figured if he could pull off me own stratagem against me and my crew that folks would respect 'im more I suppose." She puts some ember tongs in the fire and fishes out a small chunk of hot coal. She sets it in the bowl of her pipe and starts puffing intently before tossing the tongs aside.

"I'm shleeping shoundly in my cabin all comfy an' cozy" Her pipe hangs from between her teeth. She pinches free the coal from it with her fingers and tosses it back into the fire, taking a long drag from her now prepared pipe. "And in walks none other than ol' Sunny boy!" She slaps her knee and guffaws. "He hated it when ah called him that. So I sit up in my bed and I says to him 'fancy meeting you here! I don't normally take up gentleman callers.' An' I'm supposin' he thinks he's rather clever on account o' he starts up with 'I ain't no gentleman! Not tonight. Tonight I'm the most famous pirate on the seas.' What a bilge rat!" At this point she seems downright jovial.

"Now by then I'm real tired, and to be honest, fairly annoyed. I'm in my jammies and I've got to use the head somethin' fierce so I'm 'avin none of it. He starts goin' on about my unconditional surrender" She blows a raspberry crudely. "An' I'm barely hearin' 'im. I get outta bed and start heading for the bathroom like he's not even there. Obviously that upset Mr Sunny to no small degree. He reaches for his pistol and I'm quite the cocky lass so I just ignores it. I didn't think he had the stones for it."

You've been nursing your drink but she's finished hers. She's fully engrossed in her tale and is now pacing in front of the fire as she speaks. "That's when I hear it." She goes quiet and her grandiose gestures slump into a closed off position. It's a long moment where her eyes are empty and staring into nothing. Her tone was somber, almost fearful. "The hammer on his pistol. The flint strikes the frizzen. My heart sank. and then... nothing! I turn and I'm starin' down the barrel of his flintlock and I'm absolutely enraged! I hadn't made it out the door o' my cabin yet so I reach for the letter opener on my desk and start stickin' him!"

She's grinning, very in her element before she notices your discomfort at the idea of repeatedly... injuring a man with a letter opener. "Ahem. Sorry. He's fine now, we got him patched up okay after the whole incident. Anyway by now you're probably wondering what happened. Well the thing about pushing out in those little tiny boats at sea to sneak aboard is that it's not a very leisurely activity! I always kept me pistols wrapped thoroughly before headin' out, but the poor fool didn't think that far ahead! All his powder was soaked by the time he got aboard!"

You wonder about what lesson she's trying to teach here, or if she's simply recounting an incident as it happened. You can feel the coziness of the cabin beginning to take you. "The guest room's all right n' ready for ye over there. I knew that'd put ye to bed." She gives a hearty chuckle and motions to a door with her pipe. You find rest rather easily on the mountain of extra blankets.

#capitan's cabin #creative writing #short story #moomin oc #puukko #idk how to tag writing stuff adrgdthch hope this was fun for yall!#whetstone's whispers

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transsexualhamlet · 1 year

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gr. gurrrrn g. hrrr gurne, i ask. gurn

SCARED OF YOU SO BAD. GUREN FOR WHICH . QUESTION LUNA. THERES LITERALLY THIRTY OF THEM

since you have not specified I will answer the first ten and if you desire different ones/more go ahead and specify that lmao

character ask game

My first impression of them- I'll be honest, guren was just some guy to me when I first read vampire reign at the tender age of 13. I literally just didn't really care about him that much until one of my old friends who I dragged forcibly into ons with me started reading catastrophe and went NO REALLY THESE GUYS ARE SO GAY and I had to see the light.

When I think I truly started to like them- see above.

A song that reminds me of them- you know and have known for a very long time that I have a playlist for Guren and it's all the most 2000s emo amv music. A very selective few of them would be

-Violet Hill by Coldplay (lamenting what the world has become over the years with hints of war, catholicism, and political turmoil) plus a Hefty dose of "lover that may be dead or not dead and remains out of reach and yearned after"

-The Calendar by P!ATD . This is a real bittersweet one because said old friend was insane about it and was the first one to point to its. Gureshin-y-ness. You know who I'm talking about I don't need to fill you in on this but it is genuinely the most Gureshin song I know, especially one cognizant of catastrophe and resurrection. Interpreted figuratively it's a Guren song, interpreted literally, it's a Shinya song. It makes me fucking Ill every time I think about it. Like come on "they said if you don't let it out, you're gonna let it eat you away, I'd rather be a cannibal baby, animals like me don't talk anyway" tell me guren and shinya would not say that exact fucking sentence "put another x on the calendar, summer's on its deathbed, there is simply nothing worse than knowing how it ends" slash catastrophe slas h vampire reign slash im Ill. "I will come back to life but only for you, only for you- the world may call it another chance, but when I came back it was more of a relapse" HI SHINYA . HELLO hi sorry.

also. Fake Your Death by MCR. This is more of a me-specific one and the ending I had planned for chains of fate all those fateful years ago. But this is really how I see him it's just. God he has been through the wringer for so long and he is disillusioned and tired and ready for someone to just fucking kill him like he deserves and still he has so much love for the people he has dragged through the mud with him and just. it's never going to get back to the way it was before and it's just. god. me an mcr fan when the fandom implications of the lore around this fucking song. if you didnt know luna this was the last song mcr released before breaking up like. about them breaking up and its just for ghe love of fUcking god

How many people I ship them with- really just Shinya. Sorry I'm a purist. There's arguments for a sort of qpr polycule type situation but I'm truly a Gureshin purist

My favorite ship of them- YOU DONT NEED TO ASK THIS OBVIOUSLY

Least favorite ship of them- People who ship Guren and Yuu make me want to kill something that is his son. But aside from the obvious, I just. People who ship Guren and Kureto are just mystifying to me. Like I guess there's nothing wrong with it but they just do not like each other at all and Kureto is such a pathetic creature yknow. I simply cannot bring myself to like him I have Tried

A quote of them that you remember-

This one <3

Your favorite outfit of them- He has like. What ok. Um. Catastrophe school uniform catastrophe/resurrection military uniform vampire reign military uniform. and then there's the ubiquitous white button up and slacks. I have to say I liked the catastrophe military uniform the best.

Your least favorite outfit of them- They're all so fucking basic????? There's seriously so little difference between them all

Describe the character in one sentence- Stubborn atheist in the face of christian armageddon, self-determined martyr, failed revolutionary, washed up pretty boy, and absent adoptive father with terminally repressed homosexuality who god refuses to let die.

That's the first ten, I'm not spending my entire evening on this. hi luna

#rowan screams into the void #luna<3 #ask game #guren ichinose

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foolishlovers · 9 months

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proof that louis tomlinson is a good omens stan:

exhibit 1) twitter

1.1) follows michael sheen

(probably wishes david tennant had social media)

exhibit 2) lyrics

(faith in the future is an ode to good omens, u can’t convince me otherwise)

why write these lyrics if you’re not constantly thinking about aziraphale and crowley?? he probably got to read the script beforehand or smth

2.1) the greatest

Together, we’re the greatest

We'll never be that cold again

No fallin' all to pieces

We're the grеatest

It's you and me until the еnd

Life for us is never over

The way you know something

Your face reminded me

Of a love you cannot hide

But don't need to tell me why

Back dancin' in the dark

Back to the very start

Findin' pieces that can fit

Making up for what we missed

(how is this not screaming ineffable husbands to you??)

2.2) lucky again

'Cause I'm a hard man to lose

But I figured it out, then made my way back

To a life I would choose

We were lucky once, could be lucky again

I'm a hard man to find

But you figured it out and I love you for that

(THEY JUST NEED TO FIGURE IT OUT…..they could be lucky again……)

2.3) face the music

Good and bad and right and wrong

Are stories made up when we're young to scare us

Love and hate are in-between

Depends on your reality to see them

(oh cmonnn)

So, one more night

I'm gonna choose

I don't wanna face the music, but I still wanna dance with you

Let's buy some time

For what we shouldn't do

I don't wanna face the music, but I still wanna dance with you

(an angel and a demon dancing in a bookshop anyone??)

If you're standin' on the edge of fallin'

Open up and looking down

Everything that matters is forgotten

(ouch)

2.4) all this time

Oh, sometimes, sometimes, you lose your hope

But the friends we make, the love it takes

It's worth, it's worth, it's worth the pain

The friends we make, the love it takes

It's worth, it's worth, it's worth it all this time

(question: was s2 episode 6 worth the pain?)

2.5) out of my system

Slowly, I never wanna go slowly

I only wanna go faster

Towards disaster every time

With me, I know you wanna come with me

Take anything you can carry

And leave everythin' else behind

(pure crowley vibes…. is he still going too fast for him?)

Gotta get it out of my system

Gotta get it off of my chest

I've lived a lot of my life already

But I gotta get through the rest

(the rest… you mean the part where they end up in a sweet old south downs cottage together?)

Demons, I'm takin' all of my demons

Putting them where I won't see them

'Cause I just wanna feel alive

(i mean…..nothing much to say to this)

2.6) headline

You used to read me like a headline

So many reasons now you're not mine

Maybe if you'd taken more time

I'd still be the one you wanna talk to every night, oh

If you got in my head

You wouldn't be scared of what you'd find

You used to rеad me like a headlinе

Oh, that's the reason now you're not mine anymore

(okay now im just making myself sad)

2.7) saturdays

I've been wonderin' about what you're up to

Not for the first time

Not for the last time

And I've been thinking 'bout the things we used to do

Not for the first time

Not for the last time

(can u see crowley howling in his car….)

2.8) silver tongues

You and me until the end

Wakin' up to start again

You and me until the end

Wakin' up to start again

There's nowhere else that I would rather be

(it’s really just them… a group of the two of them…… until the end)

2.9) angels fly

(LIKE NAMING DEMONS WASN’T ENOUGH???)

Nothin' really matters

Nothin' really hurts

We can talk about it

It'll only make it worse

(crunching on what’s left of my heart)

There's a time for sayin' who did what

Where it went wrong

I wanna hear all that, but right now

All I need you to know is

You'll be okay, we can talk tomorrow

I'm on my way with some time to borrow

If every star is an eye in the sky

You'll see angels fly

I'll knock on your door, it'll save me from callin'

I won't say a word, it can wait till the mornin'

(…..there’s …..hope? they'll be okay??)

2.10) holding on to heartache

You said I'm holdin' on to heartache

You said I wear it like a crown

It's gonna drag me down

I'm holdin' on to heartache

You should be starin' at the sky

The birds just passin' by, love

(smth smth heartache, birds, fits just right)

2.11) copy of a copy of a copy

It's an old curse, dreamers divin' head first

Broken beaks and dead birds

Can't get through the glass

There's no use cryin' over spilled blood

Carin' only kills love

A kiss won't bring it back

(A KISS WONT BRING IT BACK I- NGHGHGKK)

thanks for coming to my (very long, oops) ted talk

#this is obviously a joke but like so many of the lyrics fit so well???? ngl there's so much in walls too but i didnt have the time #still busy trying to mend my broken heart from ep6 byeee #good omens #aziraphale x crowley #ineffable idiots #ineffable husbands #good omens season 2 #janna talks

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