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thecrystalquill · 1 year

Note

Can you make oliver wood x slytherin reader

My requests aren’t open but you’re lucky you caught me needing to get out of a creative slump and this request was vague enough to spark something.

Enjoy my first Oliver Wood one-shot my wee fellow snakes

Check out my Masterlist for more

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Sweet Surprises

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He’d wanted to hate her. Truly he did. He’d wanted to hate everything from the way she walked to the curve of her smile; the way she talked to people, the kindness in her eyes, the laugh that made his heart flutter; he’d wanted especially to hate the green robes she dawned as she flew about the pitch, but they suited her too well.

So he didn’t hate her. Not even in the slightest. Not even when she looked him straight in the eyes after every goal she launched past him, smiling that smile that had him weak in the knees, resisting the urge to apologise for ever being in her way.

There were probably dozens of reasons why the rivalry between Gryffindor and Slytherin was so strong, but Quidditch must have accounted for a good chunk of it. It was no secret that Slytherin’s team often played dirty, but other than the odd sneaky trick, Oliver knew he didn’t have to worry about that with (Y/N). And the argument she put up with her Captain over foul play was impressive; the power and authority in her voice never ceased to amaze him - if the system wasn’t rigged in favour of the rich and pure, he had no doubt that she would be their Captain, and Merlin would she do it well.

People thought they were so opposite, and on the outside it did seem like it. But their differences put aside, they were so similar, so alike, that something like an age old house rivalry seemed so unimportant the second they became friends.

Were they friends? Neither of them had ever said it but he liked to think so. When they first met, Oliver had thought it impossible. But when she’d come over after their first match in third year, her first time playing against Gryffindor, she proved otherwise. He remembers expecting her to be a sore loser, like many were, to say something insulting and standoffish. She surprised him. Congratulating his win, asking about his skill, making conversation. She continues to surprise him.

Now they were getting close to the end of their last year at Hogwarts, homework and studying took over most of their time, and Quidditch took the rest. But they found time for each other. He would help her with Transfiguration, she would help with his Herbology work, study sessions that lasted hours because they couldn’t focus on the work before them, and not to mention how she was the only reason he was passing his potions practicals.

“Are you listening?”

Blinking, Oliver turned his head to her. Her. Sat beside him in the muggle clothes her father sent, Astronomy book sat on her jean-clad lap, thigh just barely brushing his, and the bright red and white shoes she said were ‘knock-off converse’ (whatever that meant); he liked that she wasn’t unwilling to wear red, maybe she liked the rebellion and the look her peers gave her, he liked to think it was because it was his colour.

Clearing his throat, Oliver shifted his weight on the grass. “Sorry,” he began, trying not to think too hard on how beautiful she looked in the noon sunlight, “lost in thought.”

(Y/N) smiled at him, and he was glad to already be sitting down. “What about?”

Of course, he wasn’t just going to say ‘I was just thinking about how we met and how lovely you are and how you look sitting here with me in the sun looking like a literal angel and you’re my favourite person and I’m completely in love with you’. That might have saved far too much trouble. So instead he rubbed his neck and said the next thing that had been on his mind. “I don’t want this to end.” The furrow of her brow had his heart leap into his throat. Rewind. Backup. “I-I mean -er… things’re just good now, y’know? But we’re graduating soon and then what? I’ve been scouted by Puddlemere United, you got a letter about trying for Montrose Magpies which I know are your favourite and you’re gonna do amazing. Everything’s gonna change and I don’t know if I’m ready for it.” It was a topic that had been weighing on him for months, if not all year.

Uncrossing her legs, (Y/N) closed her book and turned on her side, propping herself up with one arm and sitting up to face him properly. “You’re right.” She said, and Oliver wanted to point out how those words had literally never passed her lips before, until she sent him a look as if she could read his mind. “Things are gonna change, but they’re gonna change for the better.”

“How do you know?” He asked, looking into her eyes like he was studying every shade and colour in her irises.

The corner of her lips quirked upward, trying not to smile at the remarkable comparison of his expression to that of a sad puppy. “I just do. When am I ever wrong?” He raised a brow and she immediately shook her head at him and waved a hand. “Y’know what, no, don’t answer that.” She laughed and rolled her eyes at the snicker she drew from him. Placing her hand on his, she gave him the most reassuring look she had. “But I know I’m right about this. Things are gonna change but they’re gonna get so good, Ol.”

In a moment of boldness, Oliver turned his palm up to hold her hand in his, savouring how they fit perfectly together, the softness of her fingers wrapped around his. “But what if…” he hesitated, rubbing his thumb on her hand to calm his nerves, the mere thought of what he wanted to say setting heavy on his heart, “what if we don’t see each other… what if we grow apart?”

But, as mentioned before, she never ceased to surprise him. Instead of the comforting words he’d expected, he felt a soft whack on the back of his head. “What’re you doing putting thoughts like that out into the universe? Are you mad?” She said, scolding him in that playfully serious tone she used to torment the younger teammates. Changing her position, (Y/N) faced him fully and took both of his hands in hers, squeezing them tight to make sure he was paying attention. “You and I, we’re our own team, okay? If anything we’re gonna grow closer. We’ll see each other all the time, we’ll make sure. Who else is gonna put up with me?”

Not that he ever had to simply ‘put up’ with her. Godric, he’d listen to every rant and every digression if it meant he could spend all his time with her. “And if we get too busy? You in Montrose and me in Pudlemere, we wouldn’t exactly run into each other.”

(Y/N) sat back on her knees, thinking for a minute, and he felt like he was waiting for the blade to drop. Then she smiled again, and her eyes lit up like she’d won the Quidditch Cup. “Then we move in together.”

She said it so matter-of-factly, like it were just a simple solution and not a sentence that made his entire head swim. Surely she didn’t just say that. Surely he’d just misheard. “What?”

“Well think about it.” She said, grinning in excitement. “With two incomes we can get a nice apartment and not have to worry too much about spending, we can Floo to work, we’ll see each other everyday - not to mention I’d feel better if I wasn’t living alone. It’s perfect!”

That’s it - he was sure he was going to pass out. “I- y- r-really?” Oliver stuttered out, feeling his face starting to flush and trying to fight it. She waited for him to get his head around it, sat as close to him as she could in this position, still holding his hands tight in hers, smiling that smile that took his breath away. What other answer was there? “Okay.”

As soon as the word passed his lips, (Y/N) threw herself at him, wrapping her arms around his neck in an excited embrace. She was ranting on in elation, spewing words over his shoulder on the new topic, but Oliver was no longer listening, feeling like time moved slower; closing his eyes, he held her right to him and savoured her warmth, the feeling of her body wrapped around his, his arms around her waist. Whatever she was saying, it didn’t matter - she could be talking about painting the whole apartment bright pink and turquoise and he’d be okay with it - as long as she was there, hugging him like this. His mind started to calculate ways to get her to hug him like this all the time: bringing home flowers to surprise her, baking a cake when she gets her job, buying her the perfect gift for her birthday - as long as she hugged him like this. Maybe eventually it might become a habit. An embrace that conveyed every comfort; and then he knew she was right - with her, everything would be fine.

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What do you think?? Leave a comment:D

#oliver wood #oliver wood x reader #harry potter x reader #harry potter golden era x reader #harry potter golden era #x slytherin!reader #Oliver wood x Slytherin!reader #harry potter x slytherin!reader #griffindor x slytherin #x reader #x y/n #golden era x reader

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louislovesdilfs · 5 months

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Homesick

this is a Doctor who fanfic, it's almost like a big experiment that I'm doing with a lot, LIKE A LOT, of theories or headcanons in it, crucial to this story (not all of them but whatever). I will put every source I use in this fics and if this series continues they will be A LOT. today's source tho it's just one @/whynotjohnlock I took something from them so thank you for the informations. There are some "uncanny valley" references but I tried to explain them as best as I could, let's just say it's full of nerd stuff and it will only get worst :)

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pairing: 9th Doctor x reader (will eventually become 10th later on.)

English is not my first language so I apologise for the mistakes.

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The street Y/n is walking in makes him nauseous, he saw that street so many times...the buildings, the houses, the people...all the same all the time, it's like living a nightmare: 20 years always in the same place with the same faces and the same dreams, dreams that not even he can believe.

Y/n lights up a cigarette letting the smoke fill his lungs and brain, it's poisonous yet it feels so good, the way his brain gets dizzy everytime the smoke gets in his body it's what he needs, it's the best feeling he can get in that small town somewhere.

He looks at the too familiar place with dead eyes, not even an emotion, maybe disgust for the place, he knows he will die in the same house he grew up in, like all the people in that fucking place, he will die sad and alone like his father before him, and the father of his father; lonliness and bad behaviour run strong in his family, as much as he hates it he is his parents' son, he has the same destructive, hot tempered and maybe pessimistic side of his father but the horrible, pathetic, useless kind heart his mother had..great woman his mother, always there to help the others until one day she helped the wrong person.

The street is looking as he remembers except for a tiny little detail, there's a phone box hidden in an alley, he has seen that alley a million times before but that blue box? it appeared from no where, almost a glitch in the matrix, he thinks; he's such a nerd.

Y/n steps closer carefully looking in case the owner is around, he feels the blue wood on his fingers genlty caressing it with his right hand, it's almost like the blue box can feel it, Y/n can swear he saw it light up for a tiny second. He steps away shaking his head, the door of the box is locked, he does take a picture tho, unusual to see something like that, it brought up feelings Y/n forgot he had.

"and who are you?" A voice behind him makes him flinch for a second, he never heard that voice before, Y/n turn around trying to go back to his stern look rather than the curiosity that made his face soften making him look like a kid.

"Is that yours?" Y/n asks crossing his arms, the man is wearing a big leather jacket and he's almost bald with a really noticeable nose, but overall he looks attractive Y/n has to be honest with himself

"answering a question with a question?" The man smirked in a sort of cheeky way, not arrogant even if it seemed that way

"avoiding to answer the question?" Y/n shot back tilting his head slightly, the man was a bit taller than him, probably much older, his eyes were at least, to the point where his face didn't match them.

"that is mine" the man answered in a calm tone, he looked weird tho, he didn't fit in properly, he was an english guy with a northern accent owner of a blue box in a hidden alley. Y/n looks at him suspiciously, his mind racing trying to think about what could be in that blue box, the most stupid reason comes to his mind but it's too late to stop his own mouth.

"what do you hide there? drugs? It won't take long for someone to notice it, it's a small town people talk." Y/n says looking around the alley but apparently there was nobody except for them, the man looks at Y/n puzzled and then speaks

"will you talk?" he asks waiting for an answer, Y/n raises his eyebrows, he was so weird, yet fascinating.

"no.." Y/n answers unsure looking between the man and that blue box

"great then, see ya" he says entering the blue box, but he leaves the door open, Y/n looks around the box, he hears noises coming from inside, he takes a look not sure what to expect but anything was better than the usual.

The blue box was bigger on the inside, Y/n couldn't believe his eyes, he steps in rapidly scanning the place and taking information, he processes everything as fast as he can but he feels his mind about to explode; the man is going around the console pressing buttons untill he notices the young man and smirks

"do you always come in when you're not invited?" he asks looking at Y/n with the same smug face as before

"do you always leave the door open for strangers?" He answers back quickly, too busy wondering around with his eyes to pay attention to the man

"this is the TARDIS, Time And Relative Dimension In Space" he explains crossing his arms and leaning on the console

"I was going to say bigger on the inside but.." Y/n starts to walk around biting his lower lip to think "maybe pocket dimension, this TARDIS is probably on another plane of existence or does it expand this one?" Y/n asks but wasn't waiting for an answer he just keeps thinking stopping sometimes humming a bit and then keeps talking

"if it travels in the fourth dimension, commonly known as time then it has the ability to change its weight and size...even appearance" he kept going mostly talking to himself

"it needs an incredible amount of power...a star maybe, a black hole even if less likely..fascinating tho, this can't be human and neither can you" He turns to the man who had a surprised look rather than a smug one, even a little bit amused by the man wondering around his TARDIS

"almost like uncanny valley just less scary I guess, my brain recognised you as an human being, yet something about you seemed off even if I couldn't recall what was it," Y/n affirms tilting his head to the side, that's what he always does when he's pointing out or suspecting something or at least that's what the man in the leather jacket noticed about him.

"so, what's your name?" he finishes getting closer to the man

"The Doctor" he answer with a tiny smirk crossing his arms in front of Y/n

"Doctor who?" Y/n asks raising his eyebrows, 'The Doctor' chuckles, he heard that question a lot Y/n thinks,

"just The Doctor" He says smiling at Y/n, a wide smile impressed by the younger man knowledge

"apparently you don't need me to explain how the TARDIS works.." he says while Y/n shrugs

"I failed physics 4 times, I know it by heart now" he explains in a low tone as if someone else could hear him and call him a nerd.

"you want to see it in action?" The Doctor says pressing some buttons as Y/n tryes to play it cool and hide the excitement

"is that even a question?" he just says screaming internally, finally something different, he can't believe he is leaving that small town, this can't be real, he might have bumped his head and now he's in coma.

"where are we going?" Y/n asks still focusing on the Doctor's movement, which buttons he presses and when, he can almost feel the levers and buttons under his fingers, he wants to drive the TARDIS, just to know how it feels like.

"anywhere you li-" as The Doctor tries to finish the sentence the TARDIS shakes making both of them fall to the ground, Y/n bumps his head as he groans in pain raising his hand to reach his head.

As the TARDIS stops Y/n stands up still holding his head massaging it and then turns to The Doctor with a stern look

"who gave you the licence, a fucking monkey? no not even a monkey, they would drive it better!" Y/n complains but the other man doesn't listen to him, instead he steps outside with a courious look on his face, Y/n follows him mumbling things under his breath

"we're in London?" he says looking around, Y/n scoffs

"anywhere in time and space and you bring me in London...in 2005!" he whines following the man in the city, Y/n clearly doesn't fit in, with his earrings and general piercings he looks like the lost member of the Tokyo Hotel however he tries to let the weird looks from the people slide for now,

"I didn't bring you here, the TARDIS brought us here for some reason," The Doctor answers

From that moment on things happen, they meet Rose,she's great and Y/n likes her. they fight with mannequins and a disgusting looking thing, Mickey is there too, not as great as Rose but whatever. It's time to go, Y/n knows the Doctor wants to take Rose with him, something is going on, it's clear in their eyes. Mickey is hiding behind a pallet, pathetic, Y/n thinks but doesn't say anything about it.

"a lot of good you were" Rose says looking at the man who's leaning on the TARDIS doorway, Y/n is outside, watching the scene carefully, his bleeding due to scratches on his face he tried to clean them with a tissue but that's what he gets for starting a fight with mannequins.

"Nestene Consciousness? Easy" he says with a smug smirk, Rose and Y/n let out a scoff

"you were useless in there, you'd be dead if it wasn't for me"

at the end of it Rose runs in the TARDIS, The Doctor smiles widely running to the console, even Y/n let's out a little smile looking at Rose, letting her know he's happy she came with them.

"Right then, Rose Tyler, you tell me. Where do you want to go? Backwards or fowards in time. It's your choice. What's it going to be?" The Doctor asks turning to Rose while Y/n quickly turns to him with a annoyed face,

" hey! what about me?" he says, after all he still didn't get a trip, or well he did but in London, 2005...that could've gone a bit better honestly.

"I don't talk to people with a black eye" he says turning to Y/n who mumbles "wait until I get you a black eye"

After the end of the earth, Y/n feels bad, mostly because Rose was so sentimental and sad of watching the earth get burned, he insisted watched, he watched with relief, the place that hurt him many many many years ago is burning down, he's watching it burn down. Rose calls her mom, she feels homesick, she doesn't want to look at it, Y/n tho he is watching every second of it, he's silent, his hands in his pockets, his face still bruised by the first trip, in his eyes the reflection of his world burning but no sign of sadness, to be clear no sign of anything. Rose's homesick, Y/n's home makes him sick.

The Doctor notice it, he sees the difference between his two new companions, he sees the difference in how they perceive things, when they killed Cassandra, Rose knew it was the right thing and maybe was even ok with it, Y/n wasn't, he glanced at The Doctor with rage and disappointment, how could he kill someone so easily? The Doctor tries to put a hand on Y/n shoulder but doesn't, instead Rose talks while watching the asteroids

"The end of the Earth. It's gone. We were too busy saving ourselves. No one saw it go. All those years, all that history, and no one was even looking. It's just" Rose stops not able to continue, The Doctor shifts his gaze from Y/n to Rose smiling as he easily understand her better than he can understand him.

"come with me" he says heading back to the TARDIS with rose following him, Y/n tho stays still amd that's when Rose notices the white knuckles of the man getting white while his fists get tighter,

"Y/n, you're coming?" she asks touching the man's arm lightly almost afraid, his hand relaxes as he looks at her trying to fake a calm expression as his gaze softens

"sure," he nods forcing his lips to curve in a smile.

They're back in London standing in the crowd, kids crying, people yelling and all that, Y/n sighs looking around, he doesn't understand if he's as relieved as Rose at the sight of normality but for now he turns to the other two as the Doctor begins to speak

"You think it'll last forever, people and cars and concrete, but it won't. One day it's all gone. Even the sky. My planet's gone. It's dead. It burned like the Earth. It's just rocks and dust before its time." he says opening up, Y/n remembers what they said, the last of his kind, he listens closely not talking or interrupting, he just listens to the man.

"I'm a Time Lord. I'm the last of the Time Lords. They're all gone. I'm the only survivor. I'm left travelling on my own 'cos there's no one else." he continues after Rose asked a few questions

"you have me, us" she corrects herself looking at Y/n, he looks at her and The Doctor nodding even if he knows it's not how Rose thinks, it's cute how she thinks that enough but it's not, The Doctor is alone, he doesn't have anyone to share his grief with, as much as we try no one could understand his feeling, he's alone, he will always be alone no matter how many companions he has no one will ever fill that void, Y/n knows as he looks in The Doctor's eyes and The Doctor knows too as he look at Y/n almost like he read his thoughts

"You've seen how dangerous it is. Do you want to go home?" The Doctor asks the both of them but mostly looking at Rose, she hesitates for a few second but before she can answer Y/n speaks

"I want chips, who's with me?" he says as the other two laugh and nod

"chips it is then" The Doctor says and Rose takes his arm looking up at him

"Right then, before you get me back in that box, chips it is, and you can pay." she says chuckling slightly flirting with the man

"no money" he answered and Y/n let's out a light scoff almost like a chuckle

"my treat," he says looking at the two

"see that's a gentleman" Rose jokes nudging The Doctor

"yeah, he almost won me" The Doctor says and Y/n winks at him

the three laugh heading to get chips before going back in the TARDIS for another adventure.

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chvrrycola · 1 year

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DOMESTIC BLISS W MINGYU

word count: 1.0k

warnings: brief mention of breakfast ?

currently listening to: replay (PM 01:27) by nct 127

you sighed as you remembered the frustrating phone conversation with your mother last night. another call, another set of not-so-subtle comments asking if the day would ever come when you’d be the one calling her up with the highly anticipated news that your long-term boyfriend had finally proposed.

it wasn’t that you resented her for asking, or at least, you hadn’t the first time. and really you knew that you were lucky that your parents liked mingyu so much, and that they were so eager to have him as a part of the family.

you couldn’t blame them for wanting him as their son-in-law either. he was a perfect boyfriend, and you had no reason to believe he would be any less perfect as a husband. he always offered to cook for you, washed the dishes even when he did and was always amazing with your nieces and nephews.

truth be told, he was already a fixture in your family. there wasn’t a doubt in anybody’s mind that he’d be sticking around for a long time, and, to them, that was just fuel to the question of why he wasn’t asking you to marry him at the first opportunity.

but, to you, the bliss that filled your home was all the more reason not to change anything. you didn’t feel the need to wear a ring to solidify your bond or ease your nerves about his fidelity. you didn’t have any nerves, and your bond was as tight as any of your friends and their partners’, even the ones who had been married for years.

the pressure to take a step that felt unnecessary weighed you down everytime you spoke to your parents and, even though he had been out while you were on the phone, once he came downstairs and saw you staring aimlessly at the kitchen cabinets mingyu figured out what your evening had contained.

‘good morning sweetheart,’ he whispered, voice still thick with sleep as he kissed the top of your head.

you couldn’t muster more than an ‘mmh’ for your response, still largely immersed in replaying the conversation from the night before.

‘tea or coffee?’ he asked, continuing with his morning as he waited for you to come back to the moment in your own time.

‘tea, please,’ you replied, lips barely moving as your gaze stayed fixed on the cupboard. he came into your line of sight to grab a mug for each of you, bending down so you’d be focused on his face as he waved like a child.

you blinked a few times and apologised, stretching to try and alert your body to where you actually were.

‘how was your evening?’ your question was directed at his back as he leant over the counter making your drinks, but you were curious to hear about it as you’d been fast asleep when he returned.

‘better than yours by the look of things,’ he responded, turning with your tea in hand before sitting down opposite you, ‘more of the same?’

you just nodded, feeling no obligation to bore mingyu with the ins and outs of your bickering yet again. he only raised his eyebrows, silently encouraging you to actually say whatever it was you were thinking about.

when you didn’t offer more detail, however, he stood up and walked over to where you were sitting and, still standing behind you, wrapped his arms around your shoulders.

‘you know i’d ask you to marry me right here, right now if that’s what you wanted, right?’

you only nodded again, his words hitting a chord and causing tears to brim in your eyes.

‘hey, that’s not the reaction i was hoping for,’ he said softly, pulling your chair out and crouching down in front of you, his hand coming up to stop the tears that had started rolling down your cheek.

‘i’ll do whatever you wanna do, i’ll just follow your lead, yeah? if all this is getting too much then i’ll take you to the registry office this afternoon and we can be married just like that, if that would make you happy. or, because i’m certain that won’t make you happy, we can go back to bed and enjoy it just being us two and not worry about whatever your mum said to you last night?’

at your apparent preference of the latter option, mingyu took your hands and pulled you to your feet, before turning and encouraging you to hop on his back so he could carry you back up to bed.

you allowed yourself to nestle your face into his shoulder as he carried you, noticing the light marks the tracks of your tears had left on his shirt.

once you were back in your room, mingyu carefully dropped you on your bed before flopping down next to you and laying his head on your chest.

‘your mum doesn’t know what’s best for us. she thinks she does, but i guess she doesn’t realise that we’re complete just as we are. it’s not like we’re just too afraid to fight some final boss or something.’

he chuckled at his own joke, the feeling of the air rushing through his body causing more pressure on yours, and your hands moved to reach for his hair.

‘i love you,’ you finally told him, hoping that he would feel your gratitude through the three simple words. he raised his head so that he could look at you, before pushing his weight up onto his hands so he could move to kiss the edge of your mouth, allowing you to make out ‘i know’ just from the movement of his lips against your skin.

‘i love you too,’ he eventually sighed in response as he rested his head back on your chest and closed his eyes, knowing that neither of you could ask for anything more.

#seventeen #seventeen mingyu #mingyu #kim mingyu #svt #seventeen fluff #seventeen imagines #seventeen scenarios #mingyu imagines #mingyu fluff #mingyu x reader #seventeen x reader #mingyu scenarios

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bloody-bee-tea · 1 month

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IntiMarch 2024 Day 27 - In my shoes

The prompt for this was "I want to apologise"

Satoru won’t shut up. Yaga is talking and Satoru won’t shut up and Suguru can feel his blood starting to boil. It’s not always this bad—Satoru is not always talking this much and Suguru is usually much better at ignoring it, but today has been a bad day from the start and Suguru can barely make out Yaga’s words.

The headache that’s been bothering Suguru all morning is getting worse by the second, exacerbated by his anger and the constant noise in his ears and Suguru balls his hands into fists.

He just has to get through his lesson and then he can go hide in his room and ask Shoko to go ask Yaga for a run-down of today’s lesson and maybe something of it will even stick.

If only just Satoru would shut up.

In that moment Satoru’s arm snaps up and Yaga seems ready to strangle him. Suguru would help him, he thinks, and hangs his head in shame after that thought passes his mind.

It’s not right to think like that, Suguru knows, but he’s just so angry.

“Satoru, what is it?”

“Yaga-sensei,” Satoru seriously says and just that lets Suguru know that whatever comes out of his mouth next is going to be absolute bullshit. “Why do we have to learn this stupid, boring shit?” Satoru asks, putting his chin in his hand and blinking innocently at Yaga. “How is this history lesson going to help us exorcise curses?”

His eyes slide over to Suguru as if he’s waiting for him to agree with him, to egg him on like Suguru sometimes does, but today it’s enough to make Suguru snap.

“Will you shut up for once?” he hisses out and Satoru seems just as taken aback by his outburst than Yaga does.

Good thing Shoko isn’t here right now, she would probably be laughing at all three of them.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” Satoru asks after he gets over his initial surprise and leans forward to poke Suguru’s forehead. “Did you wake up on the wrong side of bed today?”

“Fuck off,” Suguru snaps and slaps Satoru’s hand away. “Either get lost or be quiet, some of us are trying to listen here.”

“Didn’t know you’re such a model student,” Satoru huffs out and Suguru can see that he’s trying to hide how hurt he is by Suguru’s harsh words, but not everything is about Satoru and right now Suguru couldn’t care less. “This is all boring shit anyway.”

He’s just so angry and his head is hurting so much.

“You’re such a selfish bastard, you have no idea what it’s like for—” Suguru cuts himself off because he never wants Satoru to know any of this, never wants to let him know just how out of his depth he is here and so instead of continuing this pointless fight with Satoru he simply gets up and storms out of the classroom.

“Geto!” Yaga calls after him, and Suguru knows that he’ll probably be in big trouble for this later, but right now he doesn’t care.

His head hurts, his hands are shaking and he just needs to not be there for now.

He makes it halfway to his room before Satoru catches up to him, because of course he does.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” Satoru loudly asks yet again, snatching Suguru’s elbow in his hand and forcing him to stop his retreat. “You’re not usually this quick to anger. And you don’t usually lash out at me like that.”

“Yeah and you’re not usually this much of an asshole,” Suguru shoots right back but the fight is already leaving him, and fast at that, exhaustion winning out over everything else.

He stuffs his still shaking hands into his pockets, wrangling his arm out of Satoru’s grip in the process.

“What do you want?” Suguru asks, much more subdued and he wishes he could teleport, too, if only to make it to his bed faster. Or maybe he should go see Shoko first, get something for his headache after all and then sleep the rest of the day away.

“What did you mean, I have no idea what it’s like?” Satoru wants to know. “What it’s like for who?”

“You really have no goddamn idea, do you? You’re such a privileged stupid asshole,” Suguru mutters, and he sees that same hurt pass over Satoru’s face and this time, Suguru feels bad about it.

It makes him mad that he feels bad about it, but he also knows that it’s unfair to simply expect Satoru to understand if he can’t even explain. After all, it’s more than obvious that Satoru can’t simply read his mind and understand him just like that.

“What it’s like for me,” Suguru finally says and even though they are in the middle of campus he simply sits down on the ground.

He’s exhausted down to the bones all of a sudden and he fears that his legs are not going to carry him for a moment longer, especially not if he has to have this conversation with Satoru now.

“I’m not from one of the big Clans, Satoru, I know you keep forgetting that, but I’m just a nobody. You have no idea how shitty my childhood was.”

“What do you mean?” Satoru asks, clearly trying for calm himself as he squats down next to Suguru. “Explain it to me.” He gently bumps their shoulders together, cautious, as if he’s afraid that Suguru is going to explode into his face again and the fear is not completely unwarranted with how today has been going.

“I can see curses, Satoru,” Suguru reminds him. “For you that was fine, that was to be expected because your Clan knows, your Clan can too. But my family can’t. No one in my village can. Now I know to hide it, I know how to look past them, how to pretend that I’m normal. I didn’t when I was three or four or five.”

Satoru sucks in a breath and even though Suguru guesses that Satoru understands now, he keeps going. It’s hard to stop, once he started.

“It really doesn’t go over too well when a three year old tells his parents all about the crazy things he sees, of all the little curses, the one that are harmless or the ones that scare the hell out of him. It doesn’t go over well at all.” Suguru lets out a bitter chuckle. “Every kid fears the monster in the closet but usually that’s just a figment of their imagination. Not so for me. I knew that there was something in the closet and under my bed and down the street and on the back of my mother. And there is no way to explain it, no way to make them understand and so they did what the thought they had to do.”

“What’s that?” Satoru asks even though he sounds very much as if he doesn’t want to know.

Suguru can’t even blame him. It must be so nice to come from a family who understands, who can explain.

“I’ve been scared out of my mind since I can think, Satoru. I was scared and I was told I was seeing things and then my parents put me on medication. And they did it early. By the time I was eight I was addicted. I was starting to believe people when they said that what I’m seeing is not real. It wasn’t until Yaga found me that I finally learned what’s really going on. I was fifteen then, Satoru.”

“Shit,” Satoru mutters and Suguru laughs slightly, because yeah. Shit.

“I’m off my meds now, obviously, but—Shoko is still monitoring me for withdrawal symptoms. She has to, because it’s still really bad most days,” Suguru admits and hangs his head, clenching his hands.

“The shaking—” Satoru starts and Suguru nods.

“It’s one of them. The frequent headaches, the mood swings—it’s all because of that.”

“Excuse me, I’d like to think that I’m able to irritate you all on my own, thank you very much,” Satoru huffs out and it’s so ridiculous, it’s so Satoru that Suguru laughs for real.

“You’d be right about that,” he agrees, because he thinks that even without that Satoru would drive him crazy on most days.

“You never—learned any of this stuff,” Satoru mutters when Suguru calmed down again and Suguru nods.

“I have no idea about most of the things Yaga talks about. I don’t know what’s going on most of the time, but especially when it comes to the history of curses and sorcerers. It’s all new to me.”

“And I’ve been acting like the spoiled brat I am because it’s all old news to me and I completely failed to think about how it must be for you,” Satoru whispers and smacks his forehead. “I simply assumed you grew up knowing as well because it’s unfathomable to me how you could not.”

“I get why you’d think that,” Suguru shrugs. “You’ve been kind of sheltered and that’s not your fault, but—yes. I didn’t even know you were a big deal in this world until Yaga took me aside on that very first day and explained it to me. I didn’t know there were established families or anything else. Hell, learning that there’s an entire school for people like me had me so floored and spent two days in bed, questioning my entire life.”

Those hadn’t been good days. There were a lot of what-if’s floating around Suguru’s mind those days and he came dangerously close to hating his parents, even though they did the only thing they thought was right, and everyone in this school, for not finding him sooner, for not having a more reliable system in place to find young sorcerers.

It had been a very bumpy start to his time here.

“Suguru, I’m—” Satoru starts and Suguru knows what he’s going to say, but he’s not ready to hear it.

“Shut it,” he mutters. “I’m just—I’m tired, Satoru. I’m going to go to bed.”

Satoru shuffles next to him and even though Suguru expects him to argue, Satoru only nods in the end.

“Alright. Do you need anything?”

“You can bring me dinner,” Suguru says and even though it’s meant to let Satoru know that he isn’t mad, he still can’t take Satoru’s huge, grateful smile as if he’s doing him a favour.

He has done nothing but be mean to Satoru today.

“I will,” Satoru promises and gets back up, holding his hand out for Suguru.

Suguru doesn’t hesitate to take it, shaking be damned, and he’s back on his feet a second later, Satoru pulling him up with ease.

“Go rest. I’ll bring your favourite later,” Satoru promises him and Suguru can’t help himself, he briefly leans in, rests his forehead on Satoru’s shoulder.

“Thanks,” he gets out, kind of choked up because Satoru is treating him carefully right now, but he doesn’t seem to be judging him and that’s really all Suguru can ask for.

“I’m sorry for snapping at you earlier,” Suguru says, his voice muffled by Satoru’s uniform but he must hear him because he’s slapping the back of his head a moment later.

“Shut the hell up, I don’t want to hear it,” Satoru says, briefly scratching at Suguru’s scalp to ease the sting. “There’s nothing you have to apologise for.”

Suguru wants to argue, because he’s been a real ass, but he’s also tired so he only nods and forces himself to move away from Satoru.

“Later,” he says and stumbles a little bit when Satoru gives him a shove.

“Go sleep, idiot,” Satoru fondly says and Suguru is off to do exactly that.

~*~*~

He wakes up when Satoru barges into his room without so much as a cursory knock, carrying a tray of food and something else under his arms.

“What the hell,” Suguru grumbles, though he feels better and the headache is mostly gone, so he sits up, expectantly holding his hands out for the tray.

Satoru did promise him dinner after all.

“Like I promised,” Satoru says with a grin and plops it down in Suguru’s lap. “Your favourite.”

And it is; the smell instantly makes Suguru’s stomach grumble.

“I checked in with Shoko, too, she says sleeping and eating and drinking enough should suffice to get you back on your feet for today, if the symptoms don’t get worse. Did they get worse?” he asks and sits down in front of the bed, staring up at Suguru.

“No, they didn’t,” Suguru truthfully says and feels himself go a little bit hot when Satoru smiles brightly at him.

“Good. And then—” he says and gets the book he was also carrying with him “—there’s also this.”

He presents the book to Suguru as if it should tell him something but he can’t spot a title and on closer inspection it looks more like a notebook than an actual printed one.

“I wanted to apologise, so I made this,” Satoru says and hands the book over. “I wrote down everything I remember about the major Clans. Yaga still knows more than I do, probably, but this will serve as a great overview and for more in-depths questions you can always ask him, I already checked with him.”

“You—what?” Suguru chokes out and briefly flips through the pages.

Sure enough every page is filled with Satoru’s handwriting, detailing everything about the Clans he knows and which Suguru doesn’t and he’s embarrassed to admit that his eyes sting. It must have been a lot of work to write this all down today.

“You didn’t have to,” he whispers out and jolts when Satoru puts his arms on his lap and leans his head there, too, staring up at Suguru.

“I kind of had to. I was so thoughtless and I’m really sorry. I promise to behave in class from now on. And—you can always ask me, too, I know I don’t act like it but I do know my stuff. It’s why Yaga’s lessons are so boring to me but I will behave, for you.”

“Satoru,” Suguru gets out and puts the book aside to card his fingers through Satoru’s hair. “I’m sorry I kept this from you for so long, I shouldn’t have.”

“I shouldn’t have behaved like an ass, so I’d say we’re quits, how about that?” Satoru asks, his eyes curving up with his smile.

“Fair,” Suguru gets out and leans down until he can rest their foreheads together. “Thank you.”

“No, thank you,” Satoru whispers. “For telling me. I know it can’t have been easy.”

He’s right about that; it had been easy telling Shoko and even Yaga, because for all that he likes them it doesn’t quite matter to him what they think. But Satoru matters and Suguru had been scared shitless that he’d think less of Suguru if he ever knew any of this.

Suguru really should have known that Satoru wouldn’t care.

“Satoru, I—”

“I know,” Satoru interrupts him and leans up, nudging their noses together. “Me, too,” he adds in a quiet voice and Suguru huffs out an amused laugh.

He should have known that even this would be easy, with Satoru.

“Now, I’ll kiss you for real if you eat,” Satoru then says and Suguru lets out a long-suffering sigh.

“You’re insufferable,” he says, though he does reach for his food.

By now he’s starving, so it’s not even as if he needs Satoru’s incentive, though he’s not going to say no to it, that’s for sure.

“And you love me like that,” Satoru says with a bright grin and Suguru can’t believe that he’s right, but by god, is he right.

“I do. Thank you.”

“Suguru!” Satoru exclaims, going bright red in the face. “Stop thanking me! I’m still grovelling, so just stop. Eat, goddamit,” he grumbles and Suguru hides his smile with his food.

Satoru doesn’t move from his place at Suguru’s feet until he’s devoured everything Satoru brought him and even then he only climbs on the bed to put the book in Suguru’s lap and starts going through the first chapter.

Suguru gladly follows along, but he also steals a kiss for every page they get through and soon enough the book is forgotten.

And it turns out Suguru doesn’t have to steal any kisses at all, because Satoru is more than happy to give him as many as he wants.

#bt writes #jjk #satosugu #geto suguru #gojo satoru #hurt/comfort #getting together #fluff #complicated childhood

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blessedarethebinarybreakers · 2 months

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(I’m popping a extra disclaimer here because I don’t know if I worded this very well, and I understand if this isnt the kind if question you feel comfortable answering, but this is a genuine question made in good faith. I also apologise if this sounds really stupid)

I read one of your recent asks about inclusivism and it reminded me of something that always sat in the back of my mind with this train of thought.

If we say that everyone regardless of religion, or absence of it, gets into heaven, doesn’t that seem disrespectful to their faith. By saying that people of other religions get into christian heaven, is that not inadvertently telling them that their religion or their gods are fake, and that when they die it’ll be okay because they’ll learn the real truth? I hope this doesn’t come across as blunt or disrespectful to anyone, I’ve just never be able to come to a conclusion that isn’t exclusive (which is kind of a depressing thought), but is also respectful. Because it’s a beautiful idea that god loves us all regardless of who we are or what we believe, but what about people who have the kind of faith we do in a completely different god, or multiple gods, do they have the same thoughts about us? that their god loves us even though we dont believe?

I feel like I’m asking questions I’m not supposed to but I’m just really curious about your perspective if this is something you’re comfortable answering.

Hey anon, this is an important question, so thanks for asking it! You don't sound "stupid"; you're thinking like a theologian :) I'm probably not going to do it justice, I'm afraid, but maybe folks will hop on with more ideas or resources?

This got really long, so the TL;DR: I agree with you, and so do a lot of theologians and other thinkers!

In a religiously diverse world, it makes sense that people of various religions ponder where people outside their religions "fit" in their understanding of both the present world and whatever form of afterlife they have.

If someone has a firm personal belief in certain things taking place after death (from heaven to reincarnation), I don't think it's inherently wrong to imagine all kinds of people joining them in that experience, when it points to how that person recognizes the inherent holiness and value of all kinds of people, and shows that they long for continued community with & flourishing for those people.

However, this contemplation should be done with great care — especially when your religion is the dominant one in your culture; especially if your religion has a long history (and/or present) of colonialism and coerced conversions.

Ultimately, humility and openness are key! It's fine to have your own beliefs about humanity's place in this life and after death, but make yourself mindful of your own limited perspective. Accept you might be wrong in part or in whole! And be open to learning from others' ideas, and truly listening to them if they say something in your ideas has caused them or their community tangible harm.

In the rest of this post, I'll focus on a Christian perspective and keep grappling with how to consider these questions while honoring both one's personal faith and people all religions...without coming to any solid conclusions (sorry, but I don't think there's any one-size-fits-all or fully satisfying answer!).

I'll talk a bit about inclusivism and how it fails pretty miserably in this regard, and point towards religious pluralism as a possibly better (tho still imperfect) option.

And as usual I'll say I highly recommend Barbara Brown Taylor's book Holy Envy: Finding God in the Faith of Others to any Christians / cultural Christians who want to learn more about entering into mutual relationship with people of other religions.

In previous posts, I brought up the concepts of exclusivism, inclusivism, and religious pluralism without digging into their academic definitions and histories — partially because it's A Lot for a tumblr post, but also because it's by no means in my sphere of expertise. I worried about misrepresenting any viewpoint if I tried to get all academic, so I just stuck to my own personal opinions instead — but looking back at some posts, I see I didn't do a great job of clarifying that's what I was doing!

So now I'll go into what scholars mean when talking about these different viewpoints, with a huge caveat that I'm not an expert; I'm just drawing from notes and foggy memories from old seminary classes + this article from the Internet Encyclopedia of Philosophy (IEP), and anyone interested in learning more should find scholarly articles or books rather than relying on some guy on tumblr!

Defining exclusivism, inclusivism, & religious pluralism

When we encounter traditions that offer differing and often conflicting "accounts of the nature of both mundane and supramundane reality, of the ultimate ends of human beings, and of the ways to achieve those ends" (IEP), how do we respond? Do we focus on difference and reject any truth in their views that conflicts with our views? Do we avoid looking too closely at the places we differ? try to find common ground? try to make their views fit ours?

Exclusivism, inclusivism, and religious pluralism are three categories into which we can place various responses to the reality of religious diversity.

It's important to note that this is only one categorization system one can use, and that these categories were developed within a Western, Christian context (by a guy named Alan Race in 1983). They are meant to be usable by persons of any religion — all sorts of people ask these questions about how their beliefs relate to others' beliefs — but largely do skew towards a Western, Christian way of understanding religion. (For one thing, there's a strong focus on salvation / afterlife and not all religions emphasize that stuff very much, if at all!)

Drawing primarily from this article on the Internet Encyclopedia of Philosophy (IEP), here are basic definitions of each:

Exclusivist positions maintain that "only one set of belief claims or practices can ultimately be true or correct (in most cases, those of the one holding the position). A Christian exclusivist would therefore hold that the beliefs of non-Christians (and perhaps even Christians of other denominations) are in some way flawed, if not wholly false..." . (From my old class notes — Exclusivist Christians believe 3 things are non-negotiable: the unique authority of Jesus Christ as the apex of revelation; Jesus as normative; salvation exclusively through repentance and faith in Christ's work on the cross. Some will allow that God does provide some truths about Godself and humanity through general revelation, including truths found in other religious traditions, but the Biggest most Important revelation is still Jesus.) .

Inclusivist positions "recognize the possibility that more than one religious tradition can contain elements that are true or efficacious, while at the same time hold that only one tradition expresses ultimate religious truth most completely." . Christian inclusivists tend to focus on salvation, claiming that non-Christians can still achieve salvation — still through Jesus Christ. Sometimes they hold that any non-Christian whose life happens to fit Jesus's call to love God and neighbor, etc., will be saved. Other times they hold that only non-Christians who never had the chance to learn about Jesus can be saved; if you know about Christianity and reject it, it doesn't matter how "good"you are, you're doomed. .

Pluralist positions hold that "more than one set of beliefs or practices can be, at least partially and perhaps wholly, true or correct simultaneously." For Christian pluralists, that means believing that Jesus is not the one Way to God / to heaven/salvation; Christianity is one way of many, usually conceived of as all being on equal footing, to connect to the Divine. .

(These three categories are not all encompassing; the IEP article also brings up relativism and skepticism.)

Issues with Exclusivism & Inclusivism

I hope the issues with exclusivism are clear, but to name a few:

Christians who are taught that all non-Christians (or even the "wrong kind" of Christians) are doomed to hell are taught to see those people as Projects more than people — there's a perceived urgent need to convert them asap in order to "save them." The only kind of relationship you'd form with one of them is centered in efforts to convert them, rather than to live and learn alongside them as they are.

Doesn't matter if they are already happily committed to a different religion. In your eyes, they're wrong about feeling fulfilled and connected to the Divine.

Doesn't matter if you have to resort to violent and coercive practices like wiping out all signs of non-Christian culture or kidnapping non-Christian children to raise Christian — the ends justify the means because you're looking out for their "immortal souls."

...But what about inclusivism? If you're a Christian inclusivist, you aren't forcing anyone to convert to Christianity right now! You acknowledge that non-Christians can live holy and fulfilling lives! You even acknowledge that there's scraps of value in their valid-but-not-as-valid-as-Christianity religions! So what's the problem?

Turns out that this is a major case of one's good intentions not being nearly as important as one's impact.

You may be pushing back against exclusivism's outright refusal that non-Christians have any connection to the divine at all, which is nice and all — but by saying that non-Christians will basically become Christian after they die, you are still perpetuating our long history of coercive conversions.

There's a reason some scholars argue that inclusivism isn't actually a separate category from, but a sub-category of, exclusivism: you're still saying everyone has to be Christian, "so luckily you'll See The Light and become Christian after you die :)"

This is very reasonably offensive to many non-Christians. If nothing else, it's ludicrously smug and paternalistic! I won't get into it here but it only gets worse when some inclusivist positions try to get all Darwinian and start arranging religions from lower to higher, with Christianity as the "evolutionary" apex of religion ://

For now, I'll only go into detail about Catholic Jesuit theologian Karl Rahner's particular version of inclusivism, because it's quite common and really highlights the paternalism:

Rahner's Anonymous Christians:

A question that Catholics and other Christians struggled with in the 20th century was this: If non-Christians cannot be saved (because they held firm in believing that salvation must be in and through Christ), what happens if someone never even had the chance to learn about Christianity? Surely a loving God wouldn't write them an automatic ticket to hell when they're non-Christian through no fault of their own, right?

German Jesuit Karl Rahner's response was to conceive of a sort of abstract version of Christianity for non-Christians who lived good, faithful lives outside of official (what he called "constituted") Christianity:

"Anonymous Christianity means that a person lives in the grace of God and attains salvation outside of explicitly constituted Christianity. ...Let us say, a Buddhist monk…who, because he follows his conscience, attains salvation and lives in the grace of God; of him I must say that he is an anonymous Christian; if not, I would have to presuppose that there is a genuine path to salvation that really attains that goal, but that simply has nothing to do with Jesus Christ. But I cannot do that. And so, if I hold if everyone depends upon Jesus Christ for salvation, and if at the same time I hold that many live in the world who have not expressly recognized Jesus Christ, then there remains in my opinion nothing else but to take up this postulate of an anonymous Christianity." - Karl Rahner in Dialogue (1986), p. 135.

So someone who has intentionally devoted themselves to another religion, someone who does good work in that religion's name, is...secretly, unbeknownst to them, actually Christian?

I hope the offensiveness of that is clear — the condescension in implying these people are ignorant of what religion they "really" belong to! the assumption that Good deeds & virtues are always inherently Christian deeds & virtues! the arrogance of being so sure your own religion is The One Right Way that you have to construct a "back door" (as Hans Küng describes it) into it to shove in all these poor people who for whatever reason can't or don't choose to join it!

One theologian who criticized the paternalism of "anonymous Christianity" is John Hick, who was one of the big advocates for religious pluralism as a more respectful way of understanding non-Christian religions. So let's finally talk some more about pluralism!

Religious Pluralism!

As defined earlier, religious pluralist positions hold that there are many paths to the divine, and that all religions have access to some truths about the divine.

For Christians, this means rejecting those 3 non-negotiables of exclusionists about Christianity being the one true religion and Jesus being the one path to salvation. Instead of claiming that Christianity is the "most advanced" religion, pluralism claims that Christianity is just one religion among many, with no unique claim on the truth.

Some other pluralist points:

Pluralism resists antisemitic claims that Christianity is the "fulfillment" of (or that it "supercedes") Judaism.

Various religions provide independent access to salvation rather than everyone's salvation relying on Christ. (Note the still very Christian-skewed lens here in emphasizing salvation at all though!)

When we notice how different religions' truth claims conflict with one another, pluralists reconcile this by talking about how one's experience of truth is subjective.

Pluralism tends to give more authority to human experience than sacred texts

John Hicks' pluralist position

I mentioned before that Hicks is one of the big names in the religious pluralism scene. The IEP article I drew from earlier goes into much greater detail about his views and responses to it in the section titled "c. John Hick: the Pluralistic Hypothesis," but for a brief overview:

His central claim is that "diverse religious traditions have emerged as various finite, historical responses to a single transcendent, ultimate, divine reality. The diversity of traditions (and the belief claims they contain) is a product of the diversity of religious experiences among individuals and groups throughout history, and the various interpretations given to these experiences."

"As for the content of particular belief claims, Hick understands the personal deities of those traditions that posit them...as personae of the Real, explicitly invoking the connotation of a theatrical mask in the Latin word persona."

"Hick claims that all religious understandings of the Real are on equal footing insofar as they can only offer limited, phenomenal representations of transcendent truth."

We must accept that world religions are fundamentally different from each other, rather than falling into platitudes about how "we're all the same deep down"

Each religion has its own particular and comprehensive framework for understanding the world and human experience (i.e. we shouldn't use the normative Christian framework to describe other faiths)

Another angle: hospitality

As various philosophers and theologians have responded to and expanded upon pluralist frameworks, one big concept that some emphasize is hospitality: that all of us regardless of religion have an obligation to welcome others to all that is ours, if and when they have need of it — especially when they are of different cultures or religions from us.

Hospitality requires respect for those under our care, honoring and protecting their differences.

When we are the ones in need of hospitality, we should be able to expect the same.

Hospitality implies being able to anticipate our guest's needs, but we need to accept the impossibility of being able to guess every need, so communication is key!

Liberation theology & Pluralism

I also appreciate what liberation theologians have brought into the discussion. Here's from the IEP article:

"Liberation theology, which advocates a religious duty to aid those who are poor or suffering other forms of inequality and oppression, has had a significant influence on recent discussions of pluralism. The struggle against oppression can be seen as providing an enterprise in which members of diverse religious traditions can come together in solidarity.

"Paul F. Knitter, whose work serves as a prominent theological synthesis of liberation and pluralist perspectives, argues that engaging in interreligious dialogue is part and parcel of the ethical responsibility at the heart of liberation theology. He maintains not only that any liberation theology ought to be pluralistic, but also that any adequate theory of religious pluralism ought to include an ethical dimension oriented toward the goal of resisting injustice and oppression.

"Knitter claims that, if members of diverse religions are interested (as they should be) in encountering each other in dialogue and resolving their conflicts, this can only be done on the basis of some common ground. ..."

Knitter sees suffering as that common ground: "Suffering provides a common cause with which diverse religious traditions are concerned and towards which they can come together to craft a common agenda. Particular instances of suffering will, of course, differ from each other in their causes and effects; likewise, the practical details of work to alleviate suffering will almost necessarily be fleshed out differently by different religions, at different times and in different places. Nevertheless, Knitter maintains that suffering itself is a cross-cultural and universal phenomenon and should thus serve as the reference point for a practical religious pluralism. Confronting suffering will naturally give rise to solidarity, and pluralist respect and understanding can emerge from there."

Knitter also sees the planet as a source of literal common ground for us all: "Earth not only serves as a common physical location for all religious traditions, but it also provides these traditions with what Knitter calls a 'common cosmological story' (1995, p. 119). ...Knitter makes a case that different religious traditions share an ecological responsibility and that awareness of this shared responsibility, as it continues to emerge, can also serve as a basis for mutual understanding."

When Knitter and other liberation theologians speak of suffering or earth care as rallying points for interreligious solidarity, it's important to point out that such solidarity doesn't happen automatically: it is something we have to choose to commit to. We have to be courageous about challenging those who would pin suffering on another religious or cultural group. We have to be courageous about having difficult conversations, again and again. We have to learn how to work together for common goals even while accepting where we differ.

How to end this long ass post?

My hope is that as you read (or skimmed) all this, you were thinking about your own personal beliefs: where, if anywhere, do they fit among all these ideas? where would you like them to fit?

And, in the end, did I really address anon's question about whether it's disrespectful to people of other religions to assert that everyone is loved by God, or gets into heaven? Not really, because I don't know. I think it probably depends on context, and how one puts it, and how certain one acts about their ideas about God and heaven.

For me, it always comes down to humility about my own limited perspective, even while asserting that we all have a right to our personal beliefs, including ideas about what comes after this life.

When I imagine all human beings together in whatever comes next, I hope I do so not out of a desire for assimilation into my religion, but a desire to continue to learn from and alongside all kinds of people and beliefs. I hope I remain open to learning about how other people envision both what comes after death, and more importantly, what they think about life here and now. What can I learn from them about truth, kindness, justice? How can we work together to achieve those things for all creation, despite and in and through our differences?

I'll end with Eboo Patel's description of religious pluralism, which sums up much of how I feel, from his memoir Acts of Faith: The Story of an American Muslim:

"Religious pluralism is neither mere coexistence nor forced consensus. It is a form of proactive cooperation that affirms the identities of the constituent communities while emphasizing that the wellbeing of each and all depends on the health of the whole. It is the belief that the common good is best served when each community has a chance to make its unique contribution."

___

Further resources:

Explore my #religious pluralism tag for more thoughts and quotes

You might also enjoy wandering through my #interfaith tag

Two podcast episodes that draw from Eboo Patel, Barbara Brown Taylor, and other wonderful people: "No One Owns God: Readying yourself for respectful interfaith encounters" and "It's good to have wings, but you have to have roots too: Cultivating your own faith while embracing religious pluralism"

My tag with excerpts from Holy Envy

Post that includes links to various questions about heaven

Here’s a post where I talk about why I don’t believe in hell

My evangelism tag (tl;dr: I’m staunchly against prosletyzing to anyone who doesn’t explicitly request more info about Christianity)

#feel free only to read the tldr anon -- the rest goes way beyond your actual question!#exclusivism #inclusivism #religious pluralism #long post #essays #theology #other faiths tag

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l-pandamatic-l · 11 months

Text

Kyle x Marsh!Fem!Reader

' And Like Hell Is He Going To Let You Go...'

--------------------------------

So don't judge me BUT, I had this Kyle idea in my head and I just HAD to write it!

basically, you're Stan's sister, you grew up with the guys just all kinda hanging around a lot of the time so you just got used to it, not like they were your friends but yeah, but once you all get to high school, things develop.

CW/TW: slight sexual attraction implications, nothing else

You had grown up with your brother's friends just being around all the time. You knew them all, but it's not like they were your friends. But once you all got to high school, they started to talk to you a bit more. When your brother wasn't in class with you, they were actually pretty friendly. Eventually, you were invited to game nights and movies, every time Stan was out with friends, you got to tag along! Little would you know that it was all thanks to Kyle and Kenny and the way he looked at you. Even when you all were in middle school, he thought you were the most beautiful, intelligent girl he'd ever known. He wanted to talk to you all of the time, he loved listening to your voice, just letting you drone on for hours until your cheeks turned pink and you apologised for rambling. He'd just smile and ask you to continue, having no clue what you were even talking about. Kyle was so infatuated with you that it didn't take long for him to really come to terms with how he felt. Even though, he knew he would never be able to ask you out like he wished he could. Either Stan would drop him as a friend, you would horribly reject him, or both. Or so he thought. When all the guys were sleeping over at you and your brother's place, you snuck downstairs in the middle of the night for a quick snack to see a distraught Kyle sitting at the counter. You felt bad and decided it wouldn't hurt to sit down next to him and ask what was wrong. But, when you sat down, you could sense an awkward tension.

"Kyle," you asked, "Is everything alright? you seem kinda...off?" Kyle simply nodded, unable to say a word. You thought it might be that whatever was bothering him was just too difficult to talk about, but in truth, he was ashamed at the way he had eyed you up and down the minute you came downstairs. In your shorts, he could see the shape of your thighs, and the sleep shirt you wore left your shoulders exposed as it hung loose on your body. He tried to set his mind straight, telling himself that Kenny was just rubbing off on him, but when he looked up to see your angelic eyes, he knew he'd gone crazy. Crazy for you. He sighed, shaking his head, red curls falling in front of his face in shame. "It's..." he sighed, "It's a girl." He admitted, well, sort of. You did your best to hide the disappointment in your voice as you asked him to continue on. You honestly had always thought Kyle was so sweet, and you wouldn't mind having him around more often. He was cute and so kind to everyone, the perfect guy in your eyes. But, you had prepared yourself for this, He deserved some genius goddess, not you. Just the younger Marsh girl. "She- She's just- I-" Kyle struggled to find the words, groaning as he rand a hand down his face, stopping to cover his eyes and reddened cheeks. "She's smart. I could listen for hours about anything she wants to talk about. I love her voice and the way she explains everything she loves with- with this passion in her voice. And her looks, god, I don't even know where to start. She's the most gorgeous person I've ever met, and that's still an understatement!"

You listened, nodding as you held back your disappointment and sadness. "Well, why can't you just tell her? You know, that you like her so much?"

Kyle groaned, now fully aware of his predicament. "She'd say no. And it's not because she's like, mean or anything, just way too good for me. And even if she did say yes, she'd realise just how badly she messed up when she could've had the world and picked...well...me." You grabbed his hands in yours, a serious demeanour filling your body.

"What? Kyle you have got to be kidding me! Any girl would be lucky to have you! You're kind, and smart, and one of the only decent guys in the whole town! If that dream girl says no, then she never deserved your love and admiration in the first place! And-" You wanted to continue but you were cut off as Kyle's eyes began to water.

"You... really mean that?" He asked, voice strained with emotions you were more than surprised to hear coming from him.

"Well yes," you hesitated, "I mean that. You're a great guy, Kyle. It's kinda hard not to like you..."

He squeezed your hand before bringing his up to cup your cheeks, skimming his thumb over the skin there, sighing almost with relief.

You wanted to break the silence, ask him what was going through his head but you knew. You knew when he glanced down at your lips and up to you as if he were asking, pleading for an answer.

You gave him a clear yes as you bunched his shirt up in your hands and pulled his lips to yours.

Kyle let out a soft breath as his hands moved to tangle themselves in your hair, pulling you close, knowing he'd needed this for as long as he could remember. And now that he finally had it, like hell he was going to let you go.

#Kyle broflovski #Kyle x reader #spxreader #south park #South Park x reader #South Park kyle #x reader

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fallingforunrealisticromance · 10 months

Text

Send you away - 10th doctor x reader!

A/N: I'd apologise for disappearing off the face of the earth, but it'll probably happen again. I've been in the biggest writing slump, I genuinely can't remember the last time i wrote something new. Even this story is old, but i've made a lot of adjustments so it's half new i guess. If you sent in a request, it will get done and posted!! It just might take me longer than intended.

Word count: 1989

Warnings: None

------------------------------------------------------------------------ “Doctor.” You called after him as he stormed towards the console.

But he continued to ignore you. As he’d been doing for the past five minutes.

“Doctor this is getting really childish now.” You sighed, leaning against the railing.

He begun flicking a bunch of different switches, busying himself with the console as the TARDIS begun to take off. You were growing increasingly more aggravated. You didn’t even know what you’d done to warrant this behaviour from him. One moment the two of you were exploring a new planet he’d taken you too, then the next thing you knew there had been an attack of some sort. And this being the doctor’s life, of course he ran to the rescue. Somewhere along the line the aliens causing the attack had captured you. It took the doctor almost 3 hours to find you. They’re ship was full of intricate tunnels leading to a million different sections. By the time the doctor reached you, you were worn out. They hadn’t hurt you too bad. Only a few punches here and there, but it was apparently enough to form big purple bruises all over you. Other than that you were fine. That’s what you told the doctor at least. Thinking back to it now, that’s when he’d stopped answering you. He’d saved you and then just sort of stopped. He couldn’t be angry at you because of that. Right? It’s not like you asked to be kidnapped. It’s not even like you went out looking for trouble – you’d stayed by his side the whole time.

“Doctor.” You tried once more, your voice coming out a lot harsher now.

Still no response.

“Jesus Christ, 903 years old you’d think you’d have matured by now” You mumbled.

Once again you were met with nothing but the hum of the TARDIS. He was getting on your last nerve at this point. How did he expect you to fix whatever it was he was mad at you about if he wouldn’t tell you what the problem was?

“For god’s sake, TALK TO ME” You yelled, finally snapping. His eyes snapped to meet yours, seemingly taken back by your sudden change in tone. “I don’t see what I’ve done to piss you off so much, but you can’t just stand there and wait for me to figure it out.” You ranted moving towards him.

His face remained as cold as ever, unwavering as he watched you.

“I didn’t ask for them to take me. For them to make me think I was never going to see you again. So if your angry at me because of that, then you have absolutely no right. I did nothing wrong. So don’t stand there and ignore me. Either talk to me or get over yourself.” You prodded his chest with your finger as you finished your sentence.

His hand moved to grab your wrist, causing your anger to fade for a moment. You stared up at him, trying to figure out what was going on in his mind.

“Talk to me.” You said, your voice coming out as more of a whisper.

His eyes flickered with a wave of torment. As if his mind was waging a war over what to say to you. Whatever it was, it broke your heart.

“No.” He replied, letting your hand fall and walking away from you.

You stood in your spot momentarily frozen before your brain processed what he’d said.

“No? What the hell do you mean no? Doctor you can’t expect me to just know why your mad at me-“

“I’m not mad at you” He cut you off, leaning forward on the railing with his back to you.

That confused you. Slowly you stepped closer to him. “

If you’re not mad at me, why won’t you talk to me?” Your voice was coming out a lot softer than before.

The doctor sighed as he dropped his head to rest in his hands. “I’m mad at myself. I should have protected you” He mumbled.

Your heart burned hearing the sorrow laced in his tone. You hated when he got like this. He caved in on himself, allowing the guilt to overwhelm and consume him.. The man in front of you carried the weight of worlds on his shoulder’s day in, day out and chose to blame himself no matter the outcome. Even in situations he had no control over. When in fact he was just one man. An extraordinary one at that. But nonetheless he was one man. And you knew he shouldn’t try to take on as much as he did.

“It wasn’t your fault. You didn’t know it was going to happen.” You said reaching out to place a hand on his shoulder.

But he quickly whipped around to face you, anger in his eyes.

“YES I DID” He yelled.

You stumbled back, not prepared for his reaction.

“This is always what happens. Every single time and there’s nothing I can do to stop it. It happened to Rose, Martha, donna. Even to mickey. No matter how hard I try, how much I care – I can never stop losing them.” He seethed, pacing up and down.

You watched him silently, not daring to speak for fear of saying the wrong thing.

“It hurt with them. So much. But you” He stopped, turning to face you. “Losing you would break me more than I care to imagine” He breathed.

You stared at the man you’d fallen in love with, breaking at the seams right in front of you.

“You won’t lose me.” You replied, stepping closer once again.

He rolled his eyes.

“No listen to me. You won’t lose me doctor. I refuse to leave you alone. Because I know how much it hurts, to feel so utterly alone in the world. To feel that there is no one out there to care or love you. No one to make you feel safe.” You moved closer still, taking his hands in yours.

“That was me when you found me. And you showed me a whole new life doctor. And I’m not just talking about the stars and the aliens, none of that. You showed me what it’s like to feel wanted, to feel needed. Whether you intended to or not, you made me feel loved.” You said, tears threatening to spill. You avoided his gaze, choosing to focus on his hands in yours.

“You fixed me. And all the demons we seem to stumble across, they’re worth enduring for a life with you. So I will not leave you.” You concluded, finally looking back at him.

His brow was furrowed, as if he couldn’t understand your feelings. But just as quickly as before, his cold deminer returned.

“You will. If you stay.” His words stung, causing you to recoil.

At the loss of contact, his face fell. He didn’t want to hurt you. But he couldn’t lose you the way he had with the others. He needed you safe, no matter how much it pained him.

“Y-you want me to leave?” You stuttered.

It felt like the wind had just been knocked from your lungs. It had never even crossed your mind that he might not want you there. The doctor rushed towards you, wrapping his arms tightly around your waist.

“No. No I really don’t. You mean more to me then anything in the world”

You wrapped your arms around him as you buried your face in the crook of his neck.

“Knowing you has been the greatest gift the universe could’ve given me. I was hurting, just as you were. But you healed me.” He explained.

You chuckled against him. “I guess we work pretty well for each other then.”

“I suppose so.” He replied, smiling to himself.

“I just can’t stand the thought of something happening to you.” He said, pulling away from you.

Your face fell at the loss of his body against yours.

“Please don’t send me away. I have nothing to go back to.” You whimpered.

“I don’t want to. But I need you safe.” He whispered, his voice cracking.

Tears were now streaming down both of your faces.

“I’m safe with you” You replied, wiping the tears from your cheeks.

He moved towards you, cupping your face in his hands.

“I can’t promise you that.” He rested his forehead against yours.

“You don’t have to. Just please. Let me stay” You were practically sobbing at this point.

You could feel his hesitance, but you really couldn’t leave. There was nowhere for you to go. The TARDIS was your home now.

“Please doctor. I love you please don’t.” You begged breathlessly.

The doctor tensed at your words. He pulled away, still holding your face, to look at you.

“W-what did you say?” He stammered.

You were too tired to try and lie. You gently placed your hand over his, nuzzling against it.

“I love you.” You whispered.

There was a tense moment as the doctor just looked at you. Just as you went to move away from embarrassment, the doctor crashed his lips against yours. You froze for a moment unable to respond. That was the last thing you’d expected him to do. The doctor mistook your actions as regret, so he begun to pull away, trying to turn away from you. That snapped you from your thoughts.

“No” You cried as you grabbed him, pulling his lips back to yours.

His arm flew to your waist, pulling you flush against him while the other cradled your face in his hands. You had one arm round his neck, your fingers getting lost in his brown mess of hair, while the other clutched at his jacket. The kiss was so full of passion, the two of you seizing every opportunity to explore each other. You didn’t even realise you’d been moving backwards until your back hit the railing. He leaned further into you, as if it was even possible. Eventually you pulled away from one another. You rested your forehead against his, your eyes remaining closed as you breathlessly cherished the feeling. You already missed him on your lips.

“You don’t know how long I’ve wanted to do that” The doctor whispered, causing a smile to crawl its way onto your face.

You opened your eyes and pulled away to look up at him.

“Oh I think I do. It’s been a rather tiring process”

He raised his eyebrows at you quizzically. “What do you mean?”

“Do you know how frustrating it is to be pining after a certain time lord you spend every day with?” You said laughing.

“Well seeing as your not a time lord. No, no I don’t” He replied smiling. “But I do know that I’ve been falling in love with you since I met you. It scared me at first. I’m not used to feeling this way.” He admitted softly.

Your eyes softened at the thought of him not getting the love you knew he deserved.

“But I came to realise it’s not a bad thing. The effect you have on me, it’s indescribable. But I wouldn’t change it for the world.”

You were positively blushing at this point. He brushed his thumb slowly across your crimson cheeks as he stared down at you, holding nothing but pure overpowering love for you in his eyes.

“I am head over heels in love with you. And it means everything to me that you feel the same.”

You smiled brightly at him. “I love you Doctor. So much.”

“I know.” He said before leaning down and capturing your lips in yet another kiss.

This one was a lot shorter and sweeter but full of love, nonetheless. You rested against him, enjoying the warmth his arm provided. Life with the doctor was not without its difficulties, but knowing he loved you the way you loved him made the whole thing a lot more bearable.

#the doctor #doctor who #10th doctor #the doctor x reader #doctor who fan art #dr who #david tennet #tenth doctor

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dozing-marshmallow · 5 months

Note

Mind if I request a continuation of your Chris McLean x reader angst? Where Chris ends up reaching out becuase he does genuinely want them back in his life but they decline, not wanting to get hurt by him again?

Apologises I took a while to answer this!! I hope you like it nonetheless, enjoy! <3

CHRIS MCLEAN ANGST (PART 2)

You had forgotten about Chris.

Until a Summer day when you needed to go grocery shopping on one of the streets you used to go with Chris all the time.

Like his prominent being would be there on a busy Saturday now.

Would it be wrong to try relive the memory with someone else?

Yes... Yes it would.

“(Y/N)!”

Huh? Someone here knew your name?

You turn around to see the caller and gasp.

The very man in his dark-turquoise shirt and stubble.

Looking right at you.

“Chris?” What was he doing here?

“Sure is! How you been?” he smacks a hand on your back, then looks around the ageing shops, much more vibrant when you were younger,“We...used to come here a lot, didn’t we?”

“Yeah... We did.” you block out your brain’s motive to flash a teen memory montage.

Clearly Chris hadn’t,“Yeah! Back when I wasn’t as popular and as famous. I wonder if I was always destined to be as cool as I am today. Must be nice living without the paparazzi constantly trying to get shots of you living ordinary, right?” who the hell starts a conversation like that? Oh, you wanted to move on, but he wouldn’t let you,“Hey, where are you going?”

“Sorry...” you turn back around meaninglessly,“This...meeting wasn’t on my mind when I came here. I have errands to do.”

“Aw, seriously? You can’t leave them for a day to spend some time with your childhood bud?” he walked towards you, trying persuasion with his perfect smile.

...Why does he care? Did he intend to find you here?... He couldn’t even get the timing of your friendship right,“We met in middle school.”

His unchanged eyes slide around his sclerae,“Whatever, same difference. But I do miss our glory days! When we didn’t have a care in the world and we did things together all the time!”

This was very illogical,“I don’t understand... I texted you almost everyday and you never replied to me, but you had no problem updating your story.”

“Uh, maybe because I was busy and I updated it to show my contacts not to expect an answer from me anytime soon? Seriously, ya gotta learn to pick up on these things, (Y/N).” If he was gonna say that, he could have at least put the phone he was holding away to make it more believable,“But you know, seeing you here made me reminisce about the good times we had and how with my new luxurious lifestyle, I barely had time to fit you in it! If you really have to go though, I’ll just text it and post, okaaay?”

“You’re...gonna text me?” That liver of hope...with that alone, you forgot everything. To ask why he was even there in the first place, the acceptance of your rusty ties with him. Just that you...had something bright today,“Okay... Sure, I’ll reply to you as soon as possible.”

You got home and spent the next few hours at your desk, getting on with some studying and allowing your brain to soak in the promises of the interaction you had. Could it be that he missed you? Was thinking about you? Would always have chosen you out of the dozens of women he talked to everyday?

This could mean really great things, you know! This had to mean something. Maybe he’s staying in your life for good now!

Your phone pings. They always said that phones were a bad distraction, and looking back on it, you should’ve listened.

“You know I had to scroll to get to your number”

“We really haven’t talked a lot have we!”

You didn’t answer in hast. You didn’t want to show him how this desperation chained you.

“Yeah we haven’t”- we being he. That doesn’t matter. Chris was online and was talking to you. Your best friend from middle school was talking to you. This was a blessing!

You had yourselves a good catch up conversation. Well you say good when most of it was very one sided, your chat overflowing with more messages from him in neglect.

Though, your enthusiasm is zapped back up when he sends this:

“Sooo I looked at my schedule and found the only day I’m free is Monday. You wanna meet at Tim Hortons and just talk about life stuff?”

Tim Hortons... He remembered that as well? And Monday?... You used to always go out on that specific day. Was that intentional?

Was there a reason why he didn’t bother asking you how your life’s been then? Because he wanted to save it for when you two were person to person?

This is it... This was happening! He wanted you back in his life!

But why does your stomach feel so upset?

Maybe because it’s when and where he wanted to go the most.

Oh, right...

Your smile is erased.

Everything falls back for him at the end.

And maybe your organs had caught you, before you got reattached to this man.

They never change. He’s only talking to you because none of his celebrity friends can.

And once they do, he’ll forget about you all over again.

Exactly. It’s about time you stop crying over something that’ll never happen again.

You type, every letter cutting the tip of your finger like a thorn.

“We don’t need to. I think we should just be the way we were before. Don’t get me wrong, it was nice having you talk to me again and being friends with you. Congrats on all the success!”

After that, a whirl of messages from his end bombarded your phone. You take a glimpse of some of the words, “kidding”, “why”, “problem”, “jealous”.

Wow, his temper was launched into space quick. He was like a bird, getting all the useless stuff, but too full for the real goods.

I get it. You’re angry. No one’s ever said no to you. Everything has always been about you.

You put aside your phone satisfied, unresponsive. It felt good to finally have that closure.

Not tonight.

#tdi x reader #total drama #chris mclean #td chris #total drama island chris #total drama chris mclean #request #chris mclean x reader #td chris mclean x reader #tdi #angst #total drama chris

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ayameric · 2 years

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In Your Head | N. Romanoff

YOU DO NOT HAVE PERMISSION TO REPOST MY WORK UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCE.

Summary: In which Y/N is trapped in her own head, and it’s up to Natasha to get her out.

TW: Schizophrenia, suicidal themes, major character death. Please read with caution. (If I have missed any, please let me know.)

MAIN MASTERLIST

Pathetic.

Worthless.

That’s what you are, did you know that? All of this power, wasted on a useless being. You have no right to be here.

“Y/N, you with us?”

Your head snapped up from the slightly sunken position you had slumped in.

“Y-yeah, sorry, Cap.” You quickly apologised, feeling the heat from everyone around the meeting table stare at you.

Steve carried on speaking, but there was only one voice you could hear.

Voices.

Seemingly from nowhere, but so surreal it felt as though they were talking right beside you.

It was getting hard to tell the difference now.

You were relatively new to the Avengers, only having been at the compound now for a few months.

During a mission, the team found you locked away in a fortified cell of an old Hydra compound. They saw the fragile person in front of them, and took you in immediately.

They were also soon to find out about your powers, the ability to teleport and wield supernatural strength and agility.

You were a great asset to the team, but you didn’t know that.

Natasha looked at you softly from opposite the table as your gaze dropped again, noticing your mind going elsewhere.

Something had been going on ever since you got here, and it wasn’t getting any better.

In fact, she had brought it up to Tony and Bruce, but they figured it was just jitters around being in a new environment. Natasha knew it was something else.

You were jittery, that much was true, but you seemed, off. Despite the fact you had passed all your medical, Bruce had deemed you physically fit and healthy. So what could it be?

The Widow gave it time, just to make sure. Maybe it was just settling in that you were struggling with, and you certainly weren’t the most vocal person, so maybe you just felt a little lonely.

Not wanting to assume the worst, that was the fence she leaned on. But in the back of her mind, she knew that there was something wrong. But maybe, if she built that bridge with you, you’d tell her what was going on.

The team were quite fond of you. Quiet, shy and a little clumsy, but overall very loveable. They wanted you to come out of your shell, but would never force you.

The meeting continued on, and eventually Steve dismissed everyone to go about their business for the day.

Natasha noticed that you practically sprung out of your seat, heading for the door. But she managed to grab your hand just before you could rush off to wherever. (Most likely your room, you spent a lot of time in there.)

“Hey, where you rushing off to?” Nat asked with a small smile, as she loosened her grip on you, dropping your hand.

“My…my room.” You told her, but your voice was quiet. As it usually was.

“Well, me and Wanda were gonna go and watch some TV if you wanted to join?” Natasha asked hopefully, praying you’d say yes. Partially because she knew she’d have Wanda quizzing her on whatever was going on in the show, but mostly because she wanted to spend time with you.

Your face scrunched a little, and your eyes flickered around the hallway, refusing to meet Natasha’s gaze.

“Maybe.” You shrugged, scratching the back of your neck.

“Okay, whatever then you fucking freak.”

Did Natasha really just say that to you?

“L/N?” The redhead called your name softly, a tone so untypical of her that it made you look at her, properly this time.

It was getting so much worse.

“I’ll see you later.” You mumbled, walking off in the direction of your room before the assassin could say anymore.

A few more weeks had passed and yet still, the team had made no progress with you.

Wanda’s invites for cooking, Tony’s offers to come into the lab, nor Sam’s temptation to go for drinks.

Nothing.

You couldn’t. Something inside your brain was holding you back. It wasn’t like you didn’t want to spend time with these people, but your warped version of reality had truly brought you to your knees.

It had always been like this, the talking in your ear when no one was around. The comments, the conversations happening inside your head only for you to hear.

Hydra used to numb you up, drug you until you couldn’t feel.

But now you were free, and those voices came back with a relentless vengeance.

They’ll give up on you. Soon enough. Or they’ll watch you die.

It was late, you were in bed but you couldn’t rest. You hadn’t slept properly in ages. No meds meant the voices were active all hours of the day, leaving you riddled with sleepless nights.

Should’ve stayed in that cell, moron.

They wouldn’t stop. They just wouldn’t stop.

You shut your eyes, feeling hot tears well up behind your eyelids as you held your head in an attempt to shut them up. But it was no use.

That was how you spent your nights. Praying that your own head would stop trying to drive you insane, to the point where you felt so irreversibly uncomfortable in your own skin.

Maybe dying in that cell would’ve been a better fate.

That way, the voices would stop.

Unbeknownst to you, someone else in the compound also had trouble sleeping. Natasha had long since given up trying to rest that evening, her own mind running on overdrive. She wandered to the balcony of her room, staring out into the forest that the building overlooked.

It was a beautiful night.

Nat thought you were beautiful too.

God, she wanted to get through to you so badly. Because she knew that feeling, that solace. She had lived and it was awful, and she didn’t want you to deal with it, not when you didn’t have to. There was a group of people just like you, ready to welcome you into the family with open arms, but you didn’t want it.

That’s what it felt like.

But the Widow knew better. Someone like you, someone who’s been through so much would push people away for fear of trusting the wrong person again.

But she was going to prove to you that she was worthy of your trust, worthy of you.

“Morning, Y/N.” Wanda smiled brightly as you padded into the kitchen.

“Morning.” You offered a weak smile before walking over to the cupboards to grab a glass.

It wasn’t early, around 9AM, but most people in the tower were up well before you.

Wanda saw the bags under your eyes, and it broke her heart.

There was only a few people actually in the kitchen, you, Wanda, Vision, Steve and Tony.

Vision and Tony were wrapped up in a conversation by the floor length windows, whilst Steve was sat at the island eating his cereal, flipping through the newspaper.

Steve paused his movements briefly as you walked in, observing you.

“L/N, you feel like training this afternoon?” He asked you, a bright smile on his face.

You turned to look at him, but you didn’t answer straight away. In fact, you looked at him with almost shock in your eyes, but didn’t let the feeling express visibly on your face.

But just as quickly as the look appeared, it was gone.

“Sure.” You answered him, but your expression was unreadable.

You hurried out of the kitchen after that.

“What was that?” Steve asked aloud, clearly to Wanda who subtly watched the exchange.

“I-I don’t know.” The witch pulled a furrowed brow. “She seems almost…afraid of us.”

Steve really didn’t know what to say. It had been months, surely you weren’t afraid of them? Had they given you any reason to be?

“She hasn’t trained with any of us before, maybe she was nervous?” He asked hopefully, noting that now Tony and Vision had walked over, noticing the tension in the room.

“Talkin’ about Y/N?” Stark asked, and Wanda nodded, and the man sighed.

“We must get through to her. If not for the team, then for her own sake.” Vision surmised, and the others agreed.

“What more can we do?” Tony asked, knowing that it wasn’t for lack of trying.

You had headed to the gym at lunchtime, upon Steve’s request this morning. Having trained on your own over the past few months, you knew you were going to have to train with the others eventually.

So you would grin and bare it.

Entering the room in workout gear, the only person you saw in the room was Natasha. She noticed you, even with your quiet steps.

She turned around immediately, a smile appearing on her face as she saw you.

“Oh, hey Y/N.” The woman smiled, and you stayed near the door cautiously.

“Um, Steve- Steve said to come by for training?” You asked, wondering if he was just running late.

“Yeah, he got called out to meet with the US Secretary with Sam, so…” Natasha explained, and you nodded slightly. “But, we could train, if you’d like? I promise I’ll go easy on you.”

Her joke made you smirk slightly, and Natasha’s chest warmed. She didn’t see you smile much, so this was small progress.

You and Natasha begun sparring. You weren’t great with close combat, since you were trained to stick to the shadows.

Natasha was patient with you, calm, helpful.

In truth, the redhead made you nervous. The Black Widow, an infamous assassin. Who wouldn’t be? But of course, you were nervous around everyone, but the redhead more so.

She was so beautiful, a deity sent from above, stood before you. It was safe to say you were harbouring a slight crush.

Especially overhearing conversations about how Natasha is only ever this soft with you.

As far as your sparring had gone, it had kept you distracted. You were focused on vaulting the Widow’s attacks, and with your mind elsewhere, it seemed as though the voices had quietened.

You managed to find a gap in Natasha’s stance as she lunged at you, and you swept her leg, sending her down.

Natasha looked up at you, slightly breathless with a smirk on her face.

“Nice work, Y/N.” She said genuinely, and your heart thumped against your rib cage.

Don’t be ridiculous, how could she ever love you?

You are a hazard. Nothing more than a fucking liability.

Your happiness disappeared quickly, like water down a drain as the voices turned themselves back up.

Natasha stood up, dusting herself off before placing a hand on your shoulder, albeit cautiously.

“Seriously, that was really good.” Natasha looked at you, and in such close proximity, it was hard to avoid her beautiful green eyes. “I’m glad we’ve got you around, y’know?”

You didn’t know. They would never let you believe that.

“Uh, thanks” You managed to spit out, and Natasha’s smile fell at your tone. You had turned your attention to your hands, where you began unwrapping the tape that was around them.

One minute you were okay, the next you weren’t. That’s what Nat noticed.

“Y/N?” The redhead called your name, still unmoving from her position in front of you. You looked up at her, if only briefly. “Is…is everything okay? Like, here, with us and the team.”

The question shouldn’t have caught you off guard considering your behaviour, but yet it still did.

You struggled for an answer, but the voices in your head had plenty for you.

“Mhm.” You managed to nod to her, hoping that she would just let you go.

“You do know I’m a spy, right? I can see right through your bullshit.” Her tone was a little sharper now, and Natasha knew this. She felt bad, but her frustration was getting the better of her.

“I-I’m fine, I swear.” You tried, but the woman folded her arms and even teleporting wouldn’t get you out of this. “Just, getting used to everything.”

You lied. You told her what she wanted to hear.

She doesn’t believe you, they’re never going to trust you.

They’re going to kick you out, leave you for dead.

“Please, Y/N, don’t shut us out. We want to help you, let us do that.” Natasha’s stern tone had faltered, leaving it behind all together. “I know what it’s like to feel alone, but you don’t have to be. Please, let me be there for you.”

You looked at her, sadness in your eyes.

“Okay.” You offered back weakly, your bottom lip wobbling slightly.

Maybe things would be okay. Just maybe.

Things did get better, in fact.

Natasha became relentless in her attempts to hang out with you. She told you that it was mandatory, which made you laugh.

Natasha loved your laugh. It was a rarity, so whenever she heard it, she treasured it. Just like your smile.

But she made it her own personal mission to make you do those things more often.

Weeks passed by, and spending time with Natasha became more frequent. It started with training in the gym, then you would wake up a little earlier to have breakfast with the team, sometimes you would even eat dinner with them instead of option to eat in your room.

Of course, everyone noticed this change, and they all looked to Natasha in amazement.

You had called it a night just after the team finished dinner, since they were all heading to have a movie night in the common area.

“So, Romanoff, how’d you do it?” Tony asked out of nowhere as everyone began settling down to watch the movie Clint had picked out.

“Do what?” She asked half-heartedly, more focused on getting comfy on the couch beside Wanda.

“Y/N. I don’t think she’s ever been more sociable with us until recently. And I’ve got a hunch it’s something to do with you.” He deduced proudly, to which Natasha scoffed.

“A hunch?” She mocked, now finally looking at the billionaire.

“Okay, fine. But you can’t deny she hangs out with you the most out of all of us!” He pointed out, to which everyone agreed. “Which is like, crazy, considering you’re really mean.”

Wanda sent a pillow flying at his head for that comment.

“Have you ever considered maybe I’m just mean to you?” Natasha teased back with a grin on her face, causing some of the boys to holler.

“I am, offended. I put a roof over your head!” Tony defended himself dramatically, making a few of the team sat around the room laugh.

“Mhm, don’t call me for backup the next time your suit rusts up, tin-man.”

Clint shushed them, and the lights were turned off and the movie began to play.

But Natasha couldn’t stop thinking about you. Over the past few weeks, she saw glimpses of you, the real you, begin to show through the cracks. And she’d be damned if she didn’t get to see the real you, because she you’d be incredible.

You smiled a little more, and noticed that the nervous Y/N she first met started to become a more confident, happier person.

Natasha knew herself well. Well enough to know she had accumulated feelings for you. You were attractive to her, not just physically, but emotionally.

You were a nice change of pace, from the large egos (besides Wanda, of course) around the compound. Your quiet demeanour was welcoming to her.

There was a common thing between you, having similar backgrounds and lives but there was something more than that. She just felt, at ease around you for some inexplicable reason.

But for once, she didn’t raise a brow and put up her defences. She wanted to be comfortable around you.

Natasha just wanted to be with you.

You had been with Avengers for a year now, and you were finally cleared for your first real mission.

The team had hoped this moment would’ve come sooner, but your struggle to settle in set you back. But better late than never.

A relatively simple mission, a small Hydra base that was still functioning. You had insider knowledge, alongside Bucky, which would prove useful.

Steve and Natasha were careful to assign you to the mission. Knowing that going back to somewhere like this could potentially be a real detriment to you, they didn’t want to risk you pushing them away again.

But on a cold evening, one where you and Natasha had spent together in your room, watching a movie on her laptop.

You weren’t a fan of large crowds, and you weren’t all there yet to join in on the team’s movie nights. So, Natasha skipped one night and showed up at your door, computer in hand asking if you wanted to watch something with her.

So there you were, laying beside her, a little stiff. Sure, you had touched her before, whether it was her grabbing your hand in passing or sparring in the gym.

But this was different.

During a particularly slow part of the movie, Natasha dared to speak.

“Steve and I are thinking about putting you on for your first mission.” Natasha stated, and you looked at her.

“Yeah?” There was a mix of excitement and shock in your eyes, clearly you weren’t expecting field duty anytime soon.

“Yeah, but, this mission… it’s Hydra.” Nat told you, her tone quiet as to gauge your reaction, knowing it was a touchy subject.

She studied your face as you were thinking, digesting what she said.

“You don’t have to, of course. We think you’re ready, though but we won’t put you at risk, Y/N.” She said softly, but you could only focus on the way she said your name.

You could listen to it forever.

“No…I- I wanna do it. I can help you guys.” You said, your confidence growing as you spoke.

Natasha smiled at your revelation, and you smiled back too.

“I’ll let Steve know.” Nat said, noticing your gaze move back to the movie.

You felt your eye lids getting heavy, since you still weren’t sleeping great and even the voices in your head must’ve grown tired at this point.

Without realising, you had sleepily cuddled against Natasha, snuggled up beside her.

Natasha didn’t say anything, but she revelled in that connection with you. It gave her a feeling of warmth and love she would chase to the ends of the earth.

As the movie finished, you were out like a light, and Nat closed the laptop down, ready to leave. But your unconscious grip on her shirt kept her down, allowing her to sleep beside you with a protective arm over your waist during the night.

It was the best either of you had slept in a long time.

Natasha had kept the voices at bay recently. Just being around her provided you a solace like no other. You felt safe, content. No screaming voices in your head, since Natasha had unknowingly blocked them out for you.

But back in current day, you were sat on a quintet clad in a tactical suit, your leg nervously bouncing against the metal floor.

You had been training for months, you were ready for this.

You’re gonna die out there.

Shaking your head, you felt a disturbance beside you. Next thing you know Natasha was sitting beside you and placing a hand on your knee.

“You okay?” She asked tentatively.

“Yeah, I think so.” You sighed, not being able to hide the nervousness in your voice.

Natasha just squeezed your leg lightly.

“It’s gonna be fine. I’ll be right beside you the whole time.” She smiled warmly at you.

“Promise?”

The Widow chuckled.

“I promise.” As she kissed you on the cheek, leaving a burning sensation from her touch.

And she kept true to her promise. The jet landed in a forest clearing just a while out from the base, and you happily cut out all the walking by teleporting closer to the base.

Tony and Sam went overhead and scanned the building, checking for number of hostiles.

You and Natasha would be sent through to infiltrate, retrieve data from the control room and get out whilst the rest of the team dealt with the Hydra agents.

Simple enough.

Everything was going to plan, you and Nat had entered through a vent, and were taking out guards in your path.

You were almost at the control room, when Steve called through the comms that a silent alarm had been tripped, and there were guards headed to your location.

He yelled something about coming in for backup, but there was no time as Hydra guards came rushing at you from all angles.

You dove down, practically on top of Nat to protect her from the incoming fire by a nearby wall.

“Get to that control room! I can hold them off!” Natasha exclaimed above the sounds of guns firing.

But you shook your head, frowning.

“I’m not leaving you!” You told her, but Natasha just jabbed you in the shoulder.

“Go, Y/N! That’s an order!” And you relented, using your powers and teleporting off.

You appeared in the room, finding it to be empty as most of the agents had converged on you and Nat.

“Do we have the drive?” Tony asked down communications in your ear. The ear piece was uncomfortable, and now you had to deal with even more voices.

“Got it.” You confirmed, and immediately went back to Nat. You found her, leaning against the wall, having taken out most of the agents.

But then you saw her clutching at her lower right side, blood coating her hands and darkening her suit.

No, no, no!

You could see Natasha had gone pale, but still conscious. But she wouldn’t be for long.

Keeping in cover, you pressed your hand above Nat’s, applying more pressure to the wound in an attempt to stop the bleeding.

Natasha lazily looked at you as you touched her, becoming dizzier by the second.

“Shit! I- I’m sorry, Natasha. L-let me get you out of here.” You rambled, attempting to pick her up, and noticing the discomfort on her face. “Steve! Nat…Nat‘s been injured.”

You told him with disappointment in your tone, disappointment in yourself.

Never should have left her.

It should be you bleeding out in this hallway.

You squeezed your eyes closed, the talking in your ear becoming too much. You groaned, yanking out your earpiece in an attempt to gain some silence, before bending down and pulling the Widow into your arms bridal style.

Without thinking, you began bolting down the hallway, your powers failing you as you couldn’t concentrate enough to use them.

You heard more soldiers, and gun fire from behind you. It was followed by several sharp, stinging blows to your back. It sent you to stumble, but you stayed on your feet. You were going to get Natasha out Alice, even if it killed you.

The pain in your back only grew, but you would be fine.

You prayed Steve and Bucky had cleared outside of Hydra agents, because you weren’t sure how many more bullets you could take.

Shoulder-barging through the final door, a wave of cold air hit your face as you saw Steve and Bucky rush over to you.

Steve took an unconscious Natasha from your arms, and despite the horrible pain coursing through you, you could only stare on as you watched the person you cared about most in the world get carried away.

You did this to her.

You should never have left her.

This time, you couldn’t shut the voices out. Or you didn’t want to, because they were right.

Hear something enough, and eventually, you’ll begin to believe it. But you saw with your own eyes what a failure you were, and now you knew your head was right.

Natasha woke up feeling rather groggy in the hospital, her eyes blinking rapidly to adjust to the bright lights overhead.

She pushed herself up, noting there were several wires and tubes attached to her.

Aching, and definitely feeling that pain in her side now. She remembered what happened, how you saved her life.

Where were you?

Natasha wanted nothing more right now than to see your face.

But instead she got Steve.

“How are you feeling?” The blonde man asked, and Natasha just smirked.

“Like I’ve got a hole in my side.” She joked, and Steve smirked at her humour. A few beats of silence passed before she asked; “Have you seen Y/N around?”

Steve shook his head.

“She’s been in her room all week.” Steve sighed. “We think she’s blaming herself for what happened to you, but she’s not willing to let any of us in to talk.”

Natasha felt like crying. You were right back at square fucking one. After everything. But this wasn’t your fault, Natasha was okay and you got the intel, the mission was a success.

But you didn’t see it that way.

It had been two days since Natasha was hurt, and you hadn’t left your room once.

The whole team was worried, it sucked to see you push them away again just as you were beginning to open up.

But Natasha wouldn’t let that happen. The next day, she was cleared to be released, and with a slightly cramped walk, she went straight to your room.

Knocking tentatively on the door, she expected no response.

“Y/N? You in there, detka?” The redhead called out, and she heard shuffling behind the door.

Eventually, she felt a wiggle of the doorhandle, and the door open before her.

The team, who were watching from down the corridor had to hold back a shocked gasp. Nat really was your favourite.

“Y-you’re okay?” You asked, and it was clear you had been crying.

Natasha nodded.

“I’m okay. You saved my life after all.” Natasha chuckled, and you just smiled with a trembling lower lip.

“I-I didn’t save you, y-you still got hurt.” You told her, but the other woman shook her head.

“You got me out of there, despite the fact you got shot to hell. Yeah, Steve told me.” Natasha chastised you a little for being reckless. “But you still saved my life.”

You didn’t say anything, just gently wrapped your arms around her waist, pulling her in for a hug but being careful of the wound on her side.

“Missed you.” Natasha whispered into your hair.

It was a few moments after that you and Natasha pulled apart.

“Wanna watch a movie?” She asked, and you nodded, allowing her to pull you over to your bed and settle there.

You cuddled into Natasha’s good side, letting her stroke your hair.

“I never said thank you.” Natasha stated suddenly, and you looked at her. “For saving my life. Thank you, Y/N.”

You didn’t know what to say, but studying the sincere look on her face, your body acted before you could speak.

Leaning forward, you presssed your lips against hers, feeling her hand immediately come up to caress your side.

There was no better feeling than having Natasha completely against you, having her touch you with such care, kiss you like there would be no tomorrow.

It was incredible.

You both pulled away for air, resting your foreheads together as you both got your breath back.

But then Natasha spoke.

“It should’ve been you.”

What?

You pulled away, confused.

“It should’ve been you, you were the one who wasn’t fast enough to get the intel.”

Natasha’s face frowned, and your heart began to break, how could she say this to you?

“Sure, you saved my life, but that was out of guilt. This is your fault. What’s the point in having those powers if you can’t use them?!”

“Nat- I-I-“ You tried, pushing yourself away from her and moving to the edge of the bed.

What was going on? She just told you this wasn’t your fault, and now it was?

You bolted out of the room, almost falling as you did to get away from Natasha, feeling your heart break in your chest.

You skidded to a halt as you ran into Steve and Wanda who were walking and talking down the hall.

“Y/N, are you okay?” Wanda asked, noticing the distraught look on your face.

“I- I don’t know.” You whimpered.

“Well, I mean, I wouldn’t be alright after what happened.” Wanda surmised, and then Steve spoke.

“Yeah, especially if it was my fault. You sent that mission to shit, L/N. And you know it’s true, otherwise you wouldn’t have locked yourself away.”

“I told you it was too soon to put her on a mission, she’s a liability, useless.” Wanda spat venomously.

Why were they saying this? Why? Tears pooled in your eyes, and you rushed off in another direction, despite them calling your name.

You had to get out of there, you should’ve known better. Your head was right all along, you didn’t belong here, you were worthless. Certainly not worthy of an Avenger.

Rushing, it felt like the corridors where never ending.

You felt yourself begin to hyperventilate, and collapse against the wall nearby to you.

Everything was closing in, you couldn’t breathe as tears streamed down your cheeks.

I told you so.

You fucked up, now they’ll never trust you.

You’d be better off dead.

No one will want you after this.

“Shut up! Shut up, please!” You practically hit your head in attempt to silence the voices, screaming out.

It felt like a crowd talking all at once, erupting in conversations about your failure, reminding you how worthless you truly are.

You buried your head between your knees, praying that it would all just stop.

You couldn’t hear the sounds of feet rushing toward you, calling your name in terror. You could only feel a cold hand placed on your arm, causing you to jump, pushing Natasha away from you.

“Don’t touch me!” You yelled, anger in your eyes. She had never seen you like this before, you had never reacted to her touch that way and now she felt tainted.

“Y/N, what’s going on?” Steve tried, but you couldn’t answer as you gasped for breath.

“Her mind, it’s…it’s so loud. Like, screaming at her.” Wanda’s eyes glowed as she peered inside your head. Normally, she would never invade your privacy, but this was an emergency.

“How could you say that? Why would you say that to me?!” You looked at Natasha with pain in your eyes.

“Y/N! Say what?!” Natasha exclaimed back in confusion. But you just shook your head, burying it between your knees again.

“My fault. My fault.” You murmured between your knees, and the three in front of you felt awful.

“Wanda, what’s going on?” Natasha’s voice broke the same way her heart did.

“I- it’s like there’s a dozen people in her mind, all talking. Telling her this is her fault.” Wanda explained.

They’re lying to you.

Don’t trust them.

You’re dead to them.

You felt to weak to run, to fight. So when Natasha moved closer to you, crouching down, you couldn’t move away.

“Detka, what’s going inside your head?”

“It’s so loud, they won’t shut up. They never do.” You sobbed, still refusing to look at anyone. “First it’s them, now it’s you. Why- why are you doing this?”

Natasha blinked away her own tears.

“Doing what? What did we say to you?” She asked in genuine interest as she narrowed her eyes.

“You know what you said! You said it wasn’t my fault, then suddenly it was! You said you wished it was me, not you getting hurt. Then Wanda and Steve blamed me, said I was useless.”

Wanda gasped.

“No I didn’t! Y/N, none of us would ever think such horrid things, let alone say them.” The witch told you, also now crouching down to talk to you. “It’s all in your head.”

“But why can’t I tell the difference?” You trembled, your temples aching after crying so much.

“We can get Bruce to get you medication. It’ll shut those voices in your head up, I promise.”

Natasha had never broken a promise before, why would she now?

Because it’s a fucking trick! They were just blaming you for nearly letting her die, now they want you to take their drugs?! This is Hydra all over again.

This is how Hydra took you as a child.

They lured you in with kindness and promises of love.

Then they made you a monster.

You weren’t going to make the same mistake twice.

You thought you were really falling for Natasha, but, as much your heart yearned for her, your mind was louder.

In another life, perhaps you would’ve loved the woman the way you truly wanted to.

You remember Nat and Wanda taking you to the MedBay, and letting Bruce prescribe you with some medication.

But you didn’t swallow it, merely slipping it up your sleeve. They gave you sleeping pills too, considering your restless nights, but you refused to take them too out of fear.

Natasha slept with you in your room now, always holding you close, keeping you warm.

But you couldn’t tell what was real and what was fake anymore. And that was something you didn’t know if you could live with. One night, you carefully removed yourself from Nat’s embrace, and padded over to the bathroom.

The bright light flickered on, and you looked at the mirrored cabinet, showing your reflection as you leaned against the sink.

You shook your head, and opened the cabinet to pull out two little baggies of pills. The olanzapine and sleeping pills you had been prescribed, that you had pretended to take and saved up.

It felt like you were in the matrix as you stared down at the two different bags of pills in your hands. One to stay in wonderland, and one to make all the pain go away.

We’ll never go away.

You can’t ever get rid of us.

A tear rolled down your cheek.

“I know.” You whispered, taking the baggie of pills and swallowing them with a gulp of water, before returning back to your position in Nat’s arms.

She hummed as she felt your presence again, kissing the back of your neck.

It was bright outside this morning, sunny and warm.

Natasha sat up, noticing your sleeping form beside her.

“Seems like a nice day, gonna have to get up sometime, Y/N.” Natasha teased as she poked your back, expecting a grumble of defiance in response.

But you didn’t move.

“Y/N?”

Message me to join my taglist!

Taglist: @sayah13 @when-wolves-howl @diaryoflife @iliketozoneout @ageofolsen @nothingisrealanyway @wandaszn

#marvel #fxf #mcu #natasha romanoff #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff x you #natasha romanov #natasha romanoff fluff #natasha romanoff angst #natasha romanoff fanfic

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cherry-flavoured-thot · 1 year

Note

Hi, may i request Kalim with c, t and x?

🎉3k celebration 🎉

c - courtship, what do they do to hint at wanting to get together? is it obvious they’re courting you or subtle?

"Kalim, do you know what subtly means?" Jamil is looking at Kalim in scrutiny, who is thinking aloud to himself about what gift he should give to you next. He's narrowed it down to a ruby ring or a golden bracelet, he's almost talked himself into just gifting you both, until the question captures his attention. He tilts his head at the other male, who shakes his head and sighs before continuing. "How many gifts would this be now?"

"Six- no wait seven!" He’s counting on his fingers, gleefully holding them out in front of him after recalling all the gifts he’s given you so far. They weren’t all jewels, he started off with sending flowers to your dorm and making his way up to gifting the rest by hand. Jamil stares in silence, waiting for the other to actually think about it for a moment. "Ohhh I'm being too obvious right? Maybe I should be a bit more secretive about my feelings?" Everyone knows at this point that Kalim likes you, it’s all a waiting game to see how long until he actually confesses.

"Precisely."

"The gold bracelet it is!"

Jamil sighs, defeated knowing there is no point in arguing any further, as Kalim has already made up his mind.

t - tears, how often do they cry? what can cause it? what do they do when you cry? are they good at cheering you up?

Kalim is the worst person to watch movies with sad scenes in them, he cries without fail every time. It’s even worse when said sad moment has something to do with animals, if the dog dies, he’s crying his heart out. And you’re sitting there rubbing his shoulder trying to gently remind him it’s just a movie. “I know but the poor dog.” He will cling to you with tears streaming down his face until he manages to get ahold of himself, and as long as you don’t bring up the scene for the next hour he should be fine.

And when he sees you cry, whatever the reason from sad movies to actual events in your life, he might tear up too. Keeping it together to ask you what’s wrong and if can do anything to help? Did someone make you cry? He’ll go talk to the person responsible. Are you just stressed? What about a magic carpet ride to just forget about everything for a while? You’re homesick? Tell him about your home so he can find something familiar to give to you. You’re just sad? That’s okay everybody gets sad, feel free to cry as much as you like.

Whatever the scenario he’s right by your side, letting you cry and not leaving until he’s certain you feel better.

x - x-ray, what are some of their thoughts when with you that they don’t say aloud?

Kalim’s a pretty open book, almost embarrassingly so, if the first thought in his brain when looking at you is that your beautiful, he’ll voice it aloud. Even if the compliment is the type to make you tell him to stop being so cheesy, to which he’ll apologise with a grin that seems suspiciously unapologetic.

But there will be times where he needs to keep things to himself, times where he knows he has to be responsible and have to let you go after hours of spending time together. Especially before Jamil comes to drag him back, scolding him all the way home. It doesn’t mean he doesn’t miss you, or doesn’t think how nice it would be to just spend one more minute together.

“Sorry Kalim I’ve got to go! I’ll see you tomorrow.” When you say goodbye, he smiles and waves.

‘I just wanted a little more time.’ But internally he’s counting down the hours until he gets to see you again.

#kalim al asim #kalim x reader #twisted wonderland #twst #twst x reader #twisted wonderland x reader #kalim #3k celebration #x reader alphabet

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wind-becomes-lightning · 1 year

Note

I see you’ve started to get into Fairy Tail 👀 May I request “dancing in the rain” with Gray and Juvia pretty please? They’re my favorites! 💙💙💙

I would say that they too are my favourites but I love Lyon more than Gray sorry Gray! But i still like Gray with Juvia but still haha. Sorry this got so lonnnnnng, I got so mushy about them. Slightly based on that filler where they all do ballroom dancing, because it was fun. (i actually dont remember if gray is dancing with juvia there and i dont want to look it up so just.. bear with me )

prompt list.

Raindrops were falling loud against the glass of the window. The day had been surprisingly warm for spring and with it a storm had moved in. Such was the way of a city that was situated at the ocean. The constant tide flow brought in unstable weather.

“Does Gray-sama remember when he had to learn ballroom dancing?” Juvia asked, looking up from whatever book she had been reading.

Gray clenched his teeth. “I told you to please drop the honorifics.” He then blushed at the memory she had brought up. “And yes.”

Once, years ago, they had been sent on a mission that required them to attend a masquerade ball, even though neither of them could dance very well. Their master had instructed them to learn, which had in turn led to an impromptu dancing session outside the forest guild building, which had, and it was embarrassing to Gray to admit, been surprisingly fun.

She untangled herself from his legs and he stopped himself from holding her back when she propped herself up to look out the window. Despite it all, Juvia liked the rain and felt good when she could smell, see or hear it. Rain was the only thing Gray had to compete with to secure her affections and as of right now, he seemed to be losing.

“There was a rain like this too,” she said, eyes on the thick drops. “When night fell.”

Right, Gray thought. That day had been really sunny and warm as well, just March too. Somehow the time had just moved on its own, none of them had noticed how late it had become until night came and then they still continued. That was when it suddenly started raining.

“I remember you said that you are sorry.” Gray crawled over to the window and let his head down on her shoulder to regain the connection between them that he had lost when she moved away from him. “Even when it was not your fault.”

There were many things she always apologised for that weren’t her fault. One of the habits he had assured her she could drop, alongside with the submissive way she always addressed him. Both attempts had been semi-successful.

Juvia moved her head a little so her cheek rested against his. “Juvia made it rain all the time when she was younger. It is natural that she thinks it is her fault.”

“Yeah, I know.” It still happened sometimes that she made it rain when she felt sad or overwhelmed, though Gray usually stepped in before she made the unnecessary apology. “I don’t mind the rain. Especially if it’s warm out.”

“That’s what you said back then too.” She didn’t look at him, but from the way her voice was fluttering he knew that it was a precious memory for her. He buried his head into her neck so she could not see the red on his face.

That evening Gray had danced with many people, but somehow had always come back to Juvia one time or another. It was different then, when he was still so insecure around her, while she was so clear in her affection for him. So dancing seemed so intimate and while he enjoyed doing it, he couldn’t look into her face for longer than a few seconds without feeling uneasy. He didn’t understand it then the way he understood it now.

But when it started raining suddenly, which led the couples to quickly disperse from each other he got the first good look at Juvia’s face. It had shocked him how very little of her confidence was left in her eyes, as if it all had deflated in a matter of seconds. Somehow, he had known that she would apologise for the disturbance as if she had caused it and he had not been wrong about it.

“Juvia didn’t mean to.” She had said and looked more at her feet than any other place. “She didn’t want to inconvenience everybody.”

“It wasn’t your- “ Gray had tried, but figured instantly that this would not do. He could not recall well what happened next, but as if he was possessed by something he himself did not understand, he took her hand again to pull her back in the position they had been just minutes earlier.

“I have never had a problem with rain on warm days.” He had said directly into her face, maybe a little too forceful, but wanting to bring his message across clear and direct. “It is so much nicer to dance in the rain anyway, don’t you think?”

Others had agreed quickly, and though the rain was steadily falling and soaking their clothes, the dancing continued. Gray did not switch partners again and when Juvia leaned her head against his chest he let her. That night he dreamed of her too, but he still didn’t understand himself then.

And while all of this was clearly an important memory to her, sort of the first time he openly showed to return any affection, for him it was the height of embarrassment. What was he doing trying to play the knight that was saving the princess from harm? This role didn’t fit him. Juvia didn’t need defending. He had been so very uncool.

Luckily he had gotten his act together eventually because otherwise Juvia might have just run away with someone else and he couldn’t even have blamed her for it.

Juvia touched his forehead with her chin, but mercifully, she did not directly look at him. “Juvia wonders if Gray-s - , uh, Gray still remembers..” she murmured.

“I remember that day,” Gray replied, noting her slight stammer when it came to how to address him.

“No- not that.” She stopped for a moment. “Juvia wonders if Gray can still dance.”

He looked up at her so fast that he almost knocked into her: “Why …?”

She smiled and then she winked at him. It looked so cute that he made a mental note to make sure nobody else ever got to see it.

“Let’s go outside.” She took his hands. “Juvia wants to find out.” The excitement was shining in her eyes.

Gray sighed. As if he could ever say no to a face like this.

#prompt things #fairy tail #gruvia #gray fullbuster #juvia lockser #does a lil dance #im gonna watch more fairy tail now i have to fight my way through this filler im so desperate

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justjams2003 · 2 years

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A/N: Hello everyone. I just want to thank you all so much for your support so far. I really am enjoying writing these for you guys. Once again, request are open. And this one was requested by @cotton-candy-clouds-26. So thank them for this one. If I get any of the names of the drugs wrong, I apologise. There aren't a lot of articles atm as the movie only came put 4 days ago. So, please bear with me. This story also plays into my first fic with Steve

Summary: Jeff got to use N-40 with Y/N. Afterwards he can't help but want to do so once more. When he mentions so to Steve, Steve gets furious. Dosing him with Darkenfloxx and calling Y/N to watch.

Warnings: Drug abuse, Mention of sex, alluding to sex, slight mention of smut, over-possesiveness, over-protective. (Tell me if I miss any)

Pairing: Steve Abnesti x reader, slight Jeff x reader

Word count: 1,2K+ words

Unedited, please comment for mistakes.

Steve had vowed to never test N-40 on you with another person ever again. However, he did do it once. That would time would now continuely come to bite him in the ass. You had slept with a man you came to learn as Jeff. He isn’t as protective on you as Steve, but when he falls, he falls hard.

After all, who wouldn’t want you? You’re very attractive, many of the guys there would come together at times. Just to discuss the girls there. It might be a bit weird, but they’re all criminals, they’re bound to do something strange from time to time. And your name always comes up in those discussion.

Jeff knows about this, about this thing they do. He tries to avoid it as much as possible. He’s convinced himself that he would never stoop that low. That he would protect you from those men. Even if it was just your name, he would defend the mention of you.

Though, a man has his needs and the body is something we rarely truly ever control. He’d wake up from Steve��s voice hammering in his head. Just to look down and see the heat in his pants. And to remember the dreams he might have just had of you.

Therefore, when Steve called his name to the testing rooms, his heart leapt a little. The memory of the things you two had done consuming his mind. The hope that at some point he would get to experience it again. To feel you around him, screaming his name. It isn’t sinister in his eyes. You both consented to the drugs.

“Hey Steve?” Jeff calls out after sitting in the room for some time. “Yes Jeff?” Steve answer, glad he didn’t have to listen to whatever Mark was saying. “Is Y/N coming?” He asks, looking from the chair opposite him and back to the glass. Steve’s blood boils at even the mention of you.

It takes everything not to storm in there and strangle him. Why on earth was he even thinking about you? Especially in the way his voice was suggesting. You are his and only his. He’s claim you several times and it took all his willpower not to do it in every room of the compound. To show every single person you are his.

Though, that wold mean that other people would see what is his. They would get to see your round tits jump the way he liked so dearly. They would see the divine core you hold. They would get to see how your body spasm against him as you unleashed yourself against him. And that is a spectical for him only.

"Why do you ask?" Steve is gripping the mic with all his might, the table bending ever so slightly under his other hand. Jeff gives a cheeky smug and shrugs his shoulders. "She's a pretty girl." His words are like daggers stabbing Steve in the eardrums.

His whole plan shifts. He can't beat Jeff until death like he would wish. Steve still has to play charming, his mission relies closely on Jeff and earning his trust. How Steve dearly regrets choosing him now. Yet, deep down Steve knows this would've happened with anyone paired with his Y/N.

"You know how it is? Can't help but want a pretty girl like her." Jeff jokes around more, noticing the drawn out silence between them. However, his words only causes Steve to spiral more. Was Jeff really worth it? He could start over with any one of them.

On the other hand, his Obedix trial would have to start over. That would set him so far back in time. Time he didn't want you spending with men like this. Plus, he'd be able to punish his kind with so much more ease. "Steve, are you okay?" This time it's Mark's voice.

Steve’s head snaps to the side. His slight curl following him close after. "Yeah- slight change of plans. He has I-18 in his mobipack, right?" Steve’s voice is much darker than he would like to come off as. Mark is easy enough to manipulate, yet also gets scared off so quickly. And it is a pain to coarse his back each time.

Mark's adamsappel bobs as he swallows thickly while he nods. "It hasn't been tested yet-" he begins to ramble up excuses. Just as quickly, Steve forces him to shut up. "Then I suppose we should start." His throat is dry and his smile doesn't reach his eyes. In those crystal blue eyes is only anger.

"No, sorry Jeff. The single chair room is being used right now. Drip on for I-16?" He asks, trying to sound like his usual self. Jeff scuffles a bit in his seat before replying with the usual, "Acknowledge." Steve turns to Mark and shows him to turn up the flow.

So he does, the black line twirling up to a 20%. Jeff gasps at the feeling. Then his legs starts bouncing, he wrings his hands together. "Wors Jeff." Steve’s sentence is short and snappy with him. This might just be an anger jab, but even those have scientific evidence in them. Steve flings open his notepad, scribbling away at his findings.

Jeff's voice is shakey and already raw. "I don't feel well Steve. I don't like this." Steve shoots and eye at Mark, silently telling him to add more Verbaluce. "I feel nauseous, my head is spinning, there is a gutted feeling in my body." Jeff's words start flowing. That was until he stood up, rand over to the trash can and started throwing up.

That definitely makes Steve smile. "More." He does not feel like speaking, his fingers are writing just as fast as things are happening. Mark does what he's told and pumps the Darkenfloxx all the way to 45%. Jeff begins pacing, shifting all over the place. Bounces from one wall to the next. Whispering about the utter anxiety he's feeling.

"Mark do me a favour?" Steve smiles at the sight of Jeff suffering. "Call Y/N in and then stay outside." The man next to him's eyebrows furrow. But with no want to get in trouble, he does as he's told. It doesn't take long, after the other day you're always looming close to Steve.

You open the door, knocking as you pop just your head in. "Steve? You called?" Your voice sounds like a butterfly's wings on the wind. And your smile can be compared quite the same. The mentioned man lights up at the sight and he beckons you over.

You look to see the person in his testing chambers. The sight of Jeff forces a slight gasp to escape your lips. He is sweaty, pale and his eyes are darting everywhere. "What did he do?" You ask, not why Steve is doing this. You trust his judgement, he always acts with good reason.

As he comes closer, he takes you by the hips and places you in his lap. "I don't want you anywhere near him ever again." He commands, his voice darker than usual. He is normally so friendly with you. Taking time to be gentle and catering to your every need. Now, he seems more upset and from what you can tell, frustrated.

You cock your head to the side, "Why?" His grip on your hips tighten. Most likely to be bruising the next day. His leg starts bouncing ever so slightly and just jaw muscles clench wildly. "You want to know why?" He sounds very clearly angry that you don't just accept his words.

Steve starts pushing buttons and then the recording of Jeff talking about you pops up. Your heart leaps into your throat and you grab onto Steve’s blazer. You were only ever kind to Jeff, in fact you rarely even spoke with him. Why would he sexualise you so?

Steve grabs your jaw and pulls you to look him in the face. "You see? I only ever care about your well-being. Don't question me next time." He's much more angry with you that you would ever like him to be. You shake a bit, you only want to be good for him.

All you can do is nod. Your voice likely to betray you. To sob and beg for his forgiveness. Of course, he is protecting you. He always is. Its foolish of you to ever even thinking otherwise.

He then forces you to look at the experiments room. Jeff is shaking wildly. Not to mention he seems to be screaming in agony. Begging for someone to stop the pain. Stop the drip. Stop his life. Anything to make that sudden huge wave of anxiety stop.

"See what I do to people who disrespect you?" He grunts in your ear. Holding you so close you can feel your heartbeats colliding. Once again you can only nod. Scared a whimper of guilt might escape your lips. "You're mine. And mine only." He growls, taking your lips into his.

When you come up for air you can't help but agree. "I'm all yours, Steve." Your lips are swollen and puffy. Though that doesn't stop you. Heck, with Jeff's screams of agony, it makes you horny. Your kiss becomes more urgent, more needy.

Your legs wrapping around Steve's waist and your arms gripping onto his hair. "Let me shut him up before I fuck you silly. He might just kill himself before we start." Steve stops you shortly. Giggling at the thought. Even if it is grim, he's your Steve and you can't help but laugh with.

#spiderhead #spiderhead netflix #steve abnesti x reader #steve abnesti #possesive love

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cricket-reader · 1 year

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When You Walk Away Is When We Really Play (2)

Masterlist | A03 | Wattpad | Recommendations | Inbox

Summary: Wanda and Natasha learn the dark truth about what happens at the Woods residence.

(warnings contain spoilers)

Warnings: use of the word “daddy”, innocent young OFC, bad parents, crying, suggested rape/child molestation,

Word Count: 1,397

<- Part 1

“Hey, Parker.”

Peter looks up from his homework to look at his mentor who just entered the room. “Yeah?”

“I got a message from Walter. He’s going away for a bit and he asked if you’d be willing to watch over Lyla. She specifically requested you, I guess.”

Peter smiles. He hasn’t seen his little sister in so long! It also warms his heart that she requested him. This is going to be so much fun! He can’t wait to show her the new princess LEGO sets he got her.

“He also says that you just have to list a price and he’ll send you the money,” Stark continues to read from off his phone.

“I’d love to!”

Peter and Lyla have been playing with LEGOs ever since she arrived, only taking a break for lunch and snack. She was overjoyed when she saw that Peter had princess LEGOs. She immediately wanted to build all of them so they could play princesses.

“We should go get supper,” Peter mentions, putting the last piece to the Cinderella castle on.

She pouts, “but I wanna play princesses.”

“Don’t worry, we’ll have more time to play later, okay?”

She acquiesces and puts down the set she was building. They walk together to the commons where Wanda and Vision are finishing up making some borscht.

“Hey kiddo, how are you guys doing?” Wanda asks, taking the soup to the table.

“Awesome! Me and Peter were building the princess sets and later we’re going to play with them!”

“That sounds like a lot of fun!”

“You can join if you wanna, there are enough people for you two to play too!”

Wanda giggles, loving how adorable this sweet little girl is. Vision just watches his love with affection, loving how she is so good with children.

They eat their meal and Tony, Natasha, and Bruce join later on. They talk about whatever comes to mind, making sure to include Lyla in their conversations.

“So, Lyla, after supper we were thinking that it’s going to be bath time. Your dad said that you need one.” Tony says, looking at Wanda and Nat, who are probably going to need to help out.

She freezes in her seat, eyes wide. No. She doesn’t want bath time. She hates bath time. Why doesn’t Peter say something? Why isn’t he telling them that they had plans? Then she would get out of it.

“B-but Peter said we were going to-to play princesses,” she mumbles, tears forming in her eyes.

Peter grimaces, whoops. He didn’t know that she had to take a bath, otherwise he wouldn’t have gotten her too excited. “There will still be time to play princesses after the bath.”

“You can have playtime after bath time, okay?” Stark resolves.

She stands up from her seat and runs to Peter’s room. She doesn’t wanna. No. They can’t make her. Only daddy makes her do it. They… they can’t….

Peter, wide-eyed, gets up to rush after her, telling them that he’ll figure it out. Natasha goes to follow, wanting to make sure that the child is okay. Wanda looks over at Vision, silently apologising for leaving before dashing after them.

“Lyla, are you okay, princess?” Peter figures that using her nickname might make her feel a bit better. Maybe she was missing her dad. Kids get homesick quite easily.

She cries harder, hearing her daddy’s nickname come from his mouth. He’s just like him. She knows what all this means. Words like bath time, playtime, and princess. It’s all a part of daddy’s not fun games.

“Hey, Lyla,” Peter coos, crouching down to look under his desk, where she decided to hide. “It’s okay, sweetheart. We just wanna get you clean before playtime, okay?”

She knows that she has to be clean before playtime. Daddy doesn’t like it when she is icky. He tells her that no one wants a dirty girl.

“I don’t wanna have playtime,” she whimpers, trying to back herself up further. Peter’s brows pull together. He thought she was crying because she had to take a bath.

“Do you miss your dad?”

“I just want friendly Peter back,” she mumbles, lip quivering.

Distraught, Peter stumbles over his words. “I-I am friendly Peter. I just want to help, yeah?”

“Don’t want bath time. Don’t want playtime. Please don’t make me,” she begs, wide teary eyes pleading with Peter.

Peter glances back at Wanda and Natasha for help. He doesn’t know what to do.

“We got this Pete,” Wanda whispers as she puts a reassuring hand on his back.

Peter backs up and watches Lyla crash into Natasha’s arms. It saddens him. The fact that he scared her and Natasha was able to comfort her. Why couldn’t he comfort her? Why is she scared of him? Why did she say that he wasn’t being friendly? What did he do?

Natasha hums a little lullaby, trying to calm the sobbing and trembling child. Her hands run through the little girl’s tresses.

Wanda shoos Peter away, wanting the little girl to be completely comfortable. She isn’t sure if she should leave too, so she just stays near the door. Does the little girl only trust Natasha right now? Or is there something worse going on?

“What’s wrong, sweetie?” Natasha hums once she calms down.

“Don’ wanna… don’ wanna…”

“What don’t you want to do?”

“Bath time,” Lyla sniffles, grabbing on to her tighter, just hoping that she will be good and save her from having to go.

“Why not, little dove?”

“I don’t like it… it hurts,” She mutters, burying her face into Natasha’s chest.

“Hurts?” Natasha glances at Wanda, concern etched into her features.

“Not as bad as playtime.”

“Why does it hurt, малышка?”

“Daddy does things that hurt.”

Natasha tenses, intensely shooting her gaze to Wanda. Not having to be told anything, Wanda knows that Natasha wants her to peek in Lyla’s head. Normally, she wouldn’t do such a thing, hating invading others’ privacy, but when it’s something serious like this there’s no way she isn’t using her magic.

Subtly looking in her head, Wanda is horrified with the things she finds. Tears make their way to her eyes and she isn’t able to keep them in.

Natasha’s stomach twists, seeing Wanda cry. It’s bad. It’s exactly what she thought; though she had practically prayed to any and every deity that she was wrong.

“Oh, малышка… my sweet sweet girl…” Natasha murmurs, holding her just a little tighter. Her stance is almost protective now. As if Natasha could protect her from the horrors she has already lived through. As if maybe Natasha could protect her in her arms, and she would forget each abhorrent, atrocious, nauseating touch.

“Pete, calm down,” Tony sighs. “She’s fine, probably just homesick or something.”

No.

He can’t accept that.

Not with the way she was trembling and scrambling to get away from him. Not with the way her lip quivered and her voice shook. Not with the way her voice pleaded and begged so brokenly. Not with the way she was sobbing and sniffling under his desk.

None of that spelled out “fine”. In fact, it did the exact opposite. But it’s not like Mr. Stark would know that. He didn’t see what she looked like. He didn’t see any of it.

Peter perked up when he saw movement out of the corner of his eyes. Unfortunately, he didn’t see his small friend. It was just Wanda.

Wait a minute. Had she been..? She was crying.

“Wanda?” Peter questioned, rushing up to the distraught witch. His heart was beating out of his chest. What happened? What’s going on?

“I-I’m sorry,” she sniffles, “I just… I was supposed to tell you that everything is under control now. Nat is taking her to get washed up right now.”

“Why are you crying, my love?” Vision asks, having just walked back into the common room. He glides over to her side and pulls her in for a gentle hug.

“Oh Vis, it was terrible. God, I can’t believe it.”

“Take a deep breath, darling. It’s okay,” Vision calmly mutters, dragging his hand up and down her back in a comforting manner.

“No! No it’s not okay!” Wanda argues, tears spilling down her cheeks. “Oh my god.”

“Come darling, let’s go lay down,” Vision suggests, knowing that she likes getting cuddles after horrible experiences.

Part 3 ->

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