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#and now im in a funk and i dont want to make stuff that i hate
kindlyfunkn · 3 months
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i told my sister she should not cough so much when trying to throw up bc it can increase chances of aspiration, for more success she could start heaving from the stomach
"yeah well i dont know how to do that🙄"
what? heave? yse your abdominal muscles? are you fucking stupid?
#istg she comes home says shes sick and acts like she's never been sick a day in her life#she gets pissy when i offer advice bc what else tf am i supposed to do here#now she complains about no food being ready 'im so tired i was working all day then johanna wanted to hang out n get bubble tea' ok?#theres leftovers from the other day HEALTHY STUFF theres vegetables and chicken you can put in the fucking microwave 30 secs boom supper#and theres tuna i mixed with mayonnaise there on the counter and a baked potato on the stove for you do not fucking say that theres nothing#not when ive been the only one cooking here for more than just myself. every time she makes something for her supper im an afterthought#but the minute i dont make something for her (DVEN THOUGH I FUCKING DID) she gets pissed#im like a fucking maid in my own house and she complains about me#she got mad at me last night when i said 'my house' to my twin sisters friend bc 'my (sic) names on the bills' like bitch im paying you#for those still. and im listed as a tenant shut the fuck up. it IS my house. yes it's our house but it is still my house also#i clean this place i turn the heat up and down ive washed the dishes 8 out of 10 times im always making supper#i do the laundry i fold her shit too. the rare chance she does the laundry she never folds it and only takes her shit out the dryer#she did the laundry yesterday and oh whats this? all the clothes smell like rubber for some weird fucking reason im sick of her#she never does anything except buy groceries once in a while#all she does is go to her room when she gets home and thats it#funk's record log
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the-s1lly-corner · 3 months
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I’m baaaaack!!
Oh I’ve missed your writing, I just got dragged off due to some stuff irl and having a mini hyper fixation on Eddie Munson-
How are you dear? 🥺 everything okay? Drinking water and eating food? I hope you are!
Would love to see if you could possibly do hcs of all the different ways LJ would comfort you and show you how much he loves you as well as how he’d react to his s/o having gift giving and physical touch be her main love languages!
- 🩶 Anon
Laughing Jack comforting a reader who has gift giving/touch as a love language!
i have one other request in the inbox asides this one but i think imma save it for later since im!! tired.. im doing okay-ish? ups and downs, i will admit the past few weeks i havent been feeling right/like myself but im sure its just a funk or something.. gotta drink more water, though </3 hope you enjoy this anon!
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jack is very very clingy himself, like in an emotional sense but also a physical sense... if it were efficient he would wrap himself around you and not let go but unfortunately a lot of things in life would get inconvenienced
a majority of that clinginess comes from his abandonment issues, with only a portion just being a part of his personality
very verbal in wanting to keep you around, and while he may not out right say or ask it, i think sometimes he needs some reassurance from you that youre not going to be going anywhere
will take any chance he can to sling his arm around you, usually just draping it over your shoulders lazily while you guys hang around one another
i dont think hes opposed to hand holding, either.. he has very large hands and theyre warm... sharp claws, though
if anything you might have to ask him to give you space because he wants to spent a lot of his free time with you (and hes got a lot of free time if youre the one in possession of that little box of his); i think sometimes he can get a little overwhelming/overstimulating... i love him but personally i think he could be a little much every now and then
loves leaving you notes, usually leaves some candy with them. typically leaves them in places where he knows you'll find them, like by your keys or at the front door... likes leaving them when he knows youre about to leave for work or any other outing... will still leave them if hes the one leaving for something, although its rare that he needs to head out for something and admittedly i cant think of anything he would need to do/get done that would require him to leave briefly
looooooooooves showering you in affection, especially if you guys are in a romantic relationship; peppers you in kisses and snuggles into your cheek.. hugs, lots of hugs. will take any chance he can get to snake his arms around you. please cuddle him
so i think its safe to say that the physical touch bit is more than satisfied, on both ends
as for gift giving, i gotta say my brain is a little melted so i can tell whos giving and whos receiving, so lets do both!
if youre the one giving gifts to jack hes going to be totally over the moon...! a present? for HIM? is it christmas? is it his birthday? ...i dont.. think he has a birthday, actually... but that aside i think he would adore nearly anything you give him since hes totally obsessed with you. likely keeps it within close reach, be it in his own space, his box, or even in his hair since that functions as a means of storage in my silly hc!!
if hes the one giving gifts i think he would try to slink around to figure out what you like.. if its something more than candy then maybe... this would be one of those rare chances where he leaves the house for something, making sure not to be seen of course. which is easy when he can turn into a puff of smoke at will. honestly knowing him hes probably not going to be able to hold himself back from the gifts, so prepare to wake up to a whole pile of them in the morning... might try his hand at wrapping them but due to his claws theres some holes and slashes... but its the thought that counts..!
though if he needs to hide anything for occasions like birthdays hes not going to be able to keep it a secret... if he doesnt blurt it out hes going to be really antsy and keep checking where ever hes hiding the gifts to see if theyve been found or tampered yet
adding this in because i forgot comforting the reader!! right before i was about to hit post!!
if youre feeling anxious about him leaving or being upset with you i think he would reassure you to the best of his ability
tries to keep the mood light, likely cracks jokes while hes holding your hands... might be slightly rocking your hands back and forth or side to side
looks like the type to kiss tears away... though hes gonna have the be careful about it given that cone nose of his... though him attempting to be gentle while keeping his determination to pepper your face with pecks might be enough to crack a smile from you
literally will not leave you alone until youre smiling
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puzzlekinq · 8 months
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ethan i just want you to know that i can't even put into words how much i love and cherish you. like every time you make a post i'm like "new ethanpost! epic!"
your blog is literally the blog that got me into batman stuff. because i watched the fabelmans and was like "ooh i wonder what other people on this website are saying about this movie" and your blog was the first blog i found. and i was like "huh. this guy seems to have good taste. and he really likes the batman 2022. maybe i'll watch it" and then i was like "oh holy funk i'm obsessed now" so i have you to thank for that.
i just wish you were here on this couch with me. we could hug and eat snacks and my cat ollie would be there and he would meow at you and roll all over you. but i just want you to know that the world is full of people who love you. and the world is also full of little animals that love you. like these dogs i found on google
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(literally every time i'm sad i google "happy animals" and it helps. and i found these dogs! look at them! they're singing a special song just for you! and that song is called Hi Ethan We Love You So Much You Are A Really Cool Guy Who We Love)
hehhehe this is so sweet and awesome :3 it makes me happy when people tell me i made an impact in their life because its liek Waow! im thought about im perceived by others in a positive way thats So epic...
i love you so so much dean you mean the world to me. im sending hugs to you and ollie through the screen. im also hugging these ouppys, its so kind of them to sing a special song for me :3 its not every day that i get a special song
sometimes i feel like i dont matter but people like you make me think Woah maybe i can be genuinely loved and cared for just the way i am. thats a really nice feeling that i dont experience often. thank you for that. hugs you and hugs you and hugs you and h
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wifiwuxians · 3 months
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quick aside for my moment of befuddlement because ive always misunderstood the idiom "like a house on fire" LOL. i always thought it was a passive aggressive way of saying "dude, we would destroy each other lets not talk" so when i first read that I was like ??? context??? doesnt match??? did they misunderstand the idiom? DID I? then i googled it and you're right lol its a nice thing. (tho now i wanna put that in a fic bc i think that would be a delightful misunderstanding for characters to have). IM SO GLAD I MADE UR FUNK SLIGHTLY LESS FUNKY THO. you're great and you're super sweet ;w; if i had more self-confidence, i would definitely jump at the opportunity to befriend. maybe when i get more gutsy
BACK TO THE SONG LAN HATE THO. im sorry, im still in shock. just HOW. also..... how is my interpretation of them not the common one??? again, i stay so strictly to my lane i didnt know other lanes existed and i definitely dont want to hear about it bc i think song lan hate would hurt my heart. it already hurts my heart sometimes when i see xue yang hate and XUE YANG DESERVES IT. literally i despair at media literacy sometimes. i absolutely cannot understand how anyone consumed the same content as we did and decided to be mean to song lan.
YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY A FAVORITE ARTIST, DUDE. have you fucking SEEN your stuff?!? like, are you as blind as xiao xingchen? (my sweetie, may he forever regain his sight). your art is GORGEOUS. absolutely worthy of being a fav artist and i am sure im not the only one. for starters, your pieces always have a depth to them that sets them in a scene so freaking beautifully EVEN WHEN THERES NO BG or even in your more simplified styles. when you come out with a "silly phone doodle of xue yang", i see the freaking SKILL needed to make THAT adorable lil gremlin as just a 'silly doodle'. like BRO, youre so skilled that i think youve lost depth of how good an artist you really are. i wish i was smarter with art words so i could tell you in color theory exactly why your colors are so beautiful but im dumb and all i know is "color pretty" BUT SINCE I CAN PORTRAY STUFF WITH WORDS SOMETIMES i'll try to just express how your colors alone can evoke emotion and tell a story, how you use the contrast to make your art pop off the page, the way that the colors caress a scene and show so much more inside. its beautiful, your art is beautiful, i can look at a piece for such a long time and still find interesting details that make me smile. oki i'll stop beng weird now but like NEVER DOUBT YOU'RE FREAKING SKILL BRO. (shit i didnt even get to how your animations just break my brain oeuihgo i love)
lolololol dw abt telling me about the cannibalisms piece, i look Specifically disrespectfully at that one. not big into cannibalism but damn dude, there is a Mood to that piece and frankly, something that messed up sort of suits them on their worst days euorhgioeurh i like me a fluff au or a fix-it fic but damn those two can get Dark.
My otps are often rarepairs ;A; i never do it on purpose, im normally jumping headfirst into a more popular ship but then i just See the potential in two other lil guys and im like.... holdup, wait is no one else seeing those two??? AM I THE ONLY ONE WITNESSING THIS? (yes, yes i am). And the hyperfixation begins and its just me alone at a bar with no bartenders so i make my own food. but im a weird lil guy so my cocktails are always strange and im alone at the bar lol. tbh songxue is one of my LESS rarepair rarepairs. like... theres actually fics that i didnt write for them LOL. (there was one fandom where there were 40 fics for a ship and i wrote all 40. i am a sad and lonely lil loser lol)
(scuse me one of my fav artists said they think i'd write my otp well, i can die happy oaierhgoeirh i actually do write ff for songxue but hahaha im still just a silly anon but its rlly good to know that the person i think characterizes them best in the fandom (that ive seen) thinks i would do a good job with them aoeghuihr thankyou for the high praise, i guarantee i dont deserve it)
(sometimes i've wondered if the reason you draw/write them so well is bc you dont ship them? weird take but like, shippers have shipping goggles right? we see what we wanna see a lot of the time. but since you just think they'd be neat standing next to each other (much agree), you actually put thought into their characterizations and personality instead of just "this is how they'd F*CK" or smth similar. and bc the personalities and stuff mean way more to me than sexy stuff (thats the whole reason i ship them! their personalities!) the fact that even your crack stuff has such a good basis in who they are as people makes your content just so good. whereas sometimes i see content by shippers (no disrespect meant, everyone ships in their own way), its very actively ooc, usually for a kink fill, and im just... but what abt their personalities? what abt the whole reason i think they'd be good together if given the chance?! WHAT ABOUT THEM? and then u come around drawing them like that and i just wish more people portrayed them the way you do. this isnt meant as like an anti-smut thing, i like smut, its just that sometimes pwp is just two strangers who happen to have the character names of my blorbos and literally nothing else in common and theyre my BLORBOS. more power to people who like that stuff, i will stay in my lane and bother this poor lovely person who doesnt even like the ship but is kind enough to see their potential to be pals cuz damn im in it for the emotions)
heh heh yeah it means we'd get along well but i like that interpretation too and think it would make a great story!! here's to you becoming more gutsy! (though again you're very free to use an alt or something!)
genuinely why i don't go looking lmao... song lan fans are so fucking strong to have to deal with the shit people have said BUT nowadays the climate seems to be a lot better :D i see lots of thirst for him at least KFHKDJ and my appreciation post of him has 800 notes so that's hopeful at least! but same i don't get it at all (though honestly i will say a lot of character hate stems from shipping. legit.) but yeah regarding xy hate for me it's gotta be for the "right" reasons LMAO
LJHLFHFD ALL THE COMPLIMENTS MY BRAIN CANT TAKE EM!!!! genuinely!!! THANK YOU!!!! i do often tell myself 'your stuff doesn't have to be perfect it just has to spark joy' to feel better about not rendering a piece to hell and back and mostly taking the lazy route, though this year i really wanna branch out and try more! but all of this has shot me in the heart... emotion to me is the most important part of art, and one of my favorite responses to get is laughter, and you don't need a 4K HD piece for that haha BUT LISTEN YOURE NOT WEIRD EVERY ARTIST I KNOW WOULD KILL TO HEAR THIS im gonna frame it. but after ive printed and eaten another copy like wow you think i set the scene ;_; will cry (agsjdhf sorry i really do read everything im just. PROCESSING!!!)
ahaha yeah for sure! i do love me some cannibalism (i am the cannibal friend) but absolutely that was just intended as a very dark place. song lan has Had it (the premise was xy thinking hey, he likes me, let me remove the nails i am sure everything will be fineOHNOOO)
oh dude i have chronic rarepair disease. most of what i ship is stuff i've come up with myself so any content is me + 2 souls maximum who i have managed to drag with me and make content KSGKFJ (case in point, xuechao) i just have this compulsion to do what nobody else has done
(you do deserve it! and dont go looking i wanna keep being the one who portrays them best :p)
and hey maybe because YES!!!! my work almost exclusively stems from personality oh my god thank you for acknowledging that i think that is the highest praise of all... how their personalities gel together is SUPER important for me, shipping or otherwise!! i'm telling you you and i would get along really well since we agree on the fundamentals i think! like yeah there's nothing wrong with some good old self indulgence but ooc takes me out of stuff a fair bit, and trust me i feel like most people would think MY stuff is ooc! but the thing about the strangers with blorbo names made me laugh so hard lhKDHJAfhsg i am so guilty of that in the past, i've read my old stuff and i'm just like damn. i just projected onto these dudes. NO MORE (it is bound to still happen privately but hey, ultimately, write what you want to read)
song lan and xue yang, in the 'if given the chance' realm, have exactly my favorite type of duo dynamism which is why i cannot stop drawing them lol like some funky spin on boke/tsukkomi... generally speaking ">:D -_-" is visually my favorite thing to draw haha and again! i wanna say it's not an all-out global dislike, i just a) understand most people are NOT coming at it from where i am so it doesn't interest me/makes me sad, and B) understand WHY people wouldn't be into it. because wow. um. ouch. that sure is some shit
i am gonna take a moment to plug an author i think you might really enjoy, pomegranites on ao3 (@pometogo on here!) ! i can't speak for Every flavor in there being to your tastes but there are definitely a fair few fics that made me bonkers, namely not easily let go, written for song lan love week :D
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tianamarieg · 2 months
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2/16/24
wow tumblr. reading all this old stuff makes me cringe. me in my 20s was riddled with insecurities but also a lot of "i'm not like other girls" vibes. but i do see someone who really wanted to be loved under all of that. i was sure id be single for life, but i've been in a relationship for over 9 years now. you really think you are sure of shit in your 20s. but in your 30s your realize you dont know anything and, you along with everyone else, are just going through life one day at a time hoping for the best.
im one year sober (from everything!) tomorrow. i got help and got my shit together and im happy about it but also realize anything can happen and i dont know what the future will bring me. just again, hoping i continue to make the healthier choices, and if i dont i remember quickly what it feels like to be in the dark and remember the tools i acquired to get back out of that funk.
in recovery they say you recover your inner child, or your true self. i feel that. i feel more like myself in high school, before i drank or used. i truly am an introvert. i like being alone and doing things alone, but i also realize the value of connection. its important to have relationships with other people. i am learning to be comfortable with being uncomfortable and to socialize without the substances. it drains my social battery pretty quickly but i also accepted that this is okay, and its okay to leave the party as early as i need instead of forcing myself to sit through something that clearly isnt for me anymore.
i bake! for someone who wasnt a big fan of sweets, i've taken to baking pretty quickly. im also pretty good at it. who would have thought?
im also into yoga. i thought it was just stretching and boring but its so much more and i have barely scratched the surface of it.
i have been reading again but right now its mostly of the nonfiction variety. my book collection is increasing though which is nice.
i exercise a lot. i jog, walk, do strengthening videos, and the yoga as mentioned. i also eat healthy ish. i dont deprive myself but i do loosely calorie count and dont binge like i used to, but i still love food. i just learned to have a healthier relationship with food. i still dont eat meat but will try it if it looks good.
im still emotionally stunted but im trying to unlearn unhealthy behaviors and thought processes. i have a long way to go and know all this is pretty much a lifelong deal, i just hope again that things go as smoothly as they can with what i'm given at the time.
i still dont have children and still dont want any. i am not married and have no interest in it. but i have my long term partner and things are content. im okay with that in life today.
im 35 now and things arent perfect and they never will be. i cried in the dark yesterday because my anxiety and depression has been so bad, but i also remembered that none of it is permanent. my feelings will pass, and luckily i have healthy habits in place that keep me on track. vulnerability is still hard for me but im learning that its okay to not be okay, but also that its okay to be okay.
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Page 93 (part 1)
Update: They broke up with me on Saturday. I had sent them a good morning text on Thursday and they never replied, which gave me even more anxiety then I already had about all of this shit. I didn’t text them or send any memes or anything the rest of the day or on Friday. Eventually they texted me late on Friday night asking if I wanted to go for coffee the next day. I immediately knew what that meant and I started bawling. Jessica asked how I knew it was a breakup talk or if maybe they just wanted to go out, but I knew, I knew then for sure that they were going to break up with me. I cried for a majority of the night after that until they texted me again basically saying that they were in a funk about our relationship and just need time for themselves but they would explain more the next day. That made me cry harder. Jessica asked me wasn’t this what I wanted, a face to face conversation? I said yes but I just couldn’t believe they were ending it, besides all the little things in the past few weeks, im blindsided, it felt like it was going so well and It was devastating me. The next day we met at the coffee shop and they told me that they didnt have the time, space, or energy to focus or give so much to something serious and that demands so much attachment and emotions, that its for the best we end it now before we get too attached. I told them that I was already there and I was attached. I started crying, which was really embarrassing and I apologized, and they just said I didnt need to apologize and that breakups are hard. They said they wanted to make sure I knew it wasn’t because of me or anything I had done, and in fact I had been “nothing but wonderful and anyone would be lucky to have me” (ugh) but that they just need to focus on the last few months of being here and doing their job and  looking forward to their move and school. I told them I completely understand and that im so incredibly happy and excited for them, which they appreciated. I told them that even though it hurts, that im glad I got to meet them and have the time we did, and they agreed. Although, when I told them id miss them, all they said was I’d be okay, which hurt because does that mean they won’t miss me? Why couldn’t they have said literally anything other than that? And the fact that they didnt seem sad at all kills me, in fact, they looked more like they felt bad for me, which makes me want to die. That is literally so embarrassing to think that they just feel bad because they’re breaking my heart or whatever and that they aren’t actually all that affected. But, what hurt the most, was them saying that if things were different and they were staying, they could have seen us working out long term, and it just fucking sucks, knowing that there had been a possibility that if they hadn’t gotten into Harvard then they would be staying here and we could have been together. Another cliche, oh it happened in another universe or maybe next life ill be in the one where they dont leave and we stay tohether. It always come back to that for me, wanting to feel happy in the idea that somewhere else it might have worked. Hana said that if they had really meant what they said, then they would have been willing to try and make it work because my person will want to go through the hard stuff with me to make it work. That hurt so much to hear and I just wish I could be with them. I already miss them so much, and this is a different kind of pain then if we had broken up in August, because even though I knew what was going to happen, at least they would have been gone, out of San Diego, but now, they are still here, living 10 minutes away from me, and I will have to live for the next 2 months knowing that they are here and I am not getting to be with them, and that is painful as fuck. It’s like with Liam over summer two years ago, where I knew he was back in Florida, and instead of making plans like we had previously, I had to know he was there but never actually get to spend time with him.
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minnieposting · 1 year
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im in a bit of a funk. i keep focusing on negative stuff and feeling really down and depressed aghuahfi so im gonna just start dumping abt shit that makes me happy
mentioning going outside again iaufiuasf it was rlly nice tho!!!! i helped my dad and felt air and sun on me and it was nice. i share my dads desire to just pack up and move somewhere remote uishfuidsf i didnt always cuz i loved my city but i really want to experience stardew valley irl. i was abt to start drabbing abt my city but NO this is a HAPPY POST! its full of art and its big and i love it! i just dont think theres anything here for me at all!!!
and vocaloid!!!ive been thinking abt vocaloid more often and im really happy to bc its my FAVORITE THING IN THE ENTIREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE WORLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! thinking abt gakukai and gakupo + kaito individually is the best ever. they mean a lot to me and to play with them again makes me happy. i am in a bit of an art funk though so i WOULD be drawing them ................ but everythings coming out UGLYYY [SCREAMS AND DIES].
if younger me could see my art now and see my kaitos and future gakukais shed lose her mind ....... my biggest motivator fr fr
im having fun drawing and CONSUMING MEDIA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and thinking about my favs!!!!!! my therapist actually told me i need to stop being chronically online and learn to not make my interests Me... but she doesnt get it !!!! i dont think its a bad thing that my interests basically make up who i am. esp vocaloid. vocaloids litreally ME and its a part of my soul not even just a part it is my soul. i dont think anyone could ever truly get what i mean, bc its so much more deep and complex than that, but i think thats awesome. this love is smth that only i know, and its mine! i want to say its grounding almost?
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broth-y · 4 years
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i am really out here repeatedly posting ideas and saying i'm going to write things-
and then not posting any writing since june.
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magstorrn · 2 years
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ok i am desperately trying to remember as much as i can from sonic 2 (will be seeing it again in a couple days) but a few things that i loved/noticed
- i know that a few people were worried (including me) about them leaning too heavily toward the superhero angle with the whole blue justice thing, but that was mercifully really short and was just a way of showing how sonic was being overly reckless/arrogant! and it was nice to see them showing that side of him too
- i just have to say. the winter soldier line WAS annoying, but that fucking pay off?? the whole ‘bucky saves steve’ thing but with knuckes and sonic?? hello? IM LOSING IT
- unfortunately i found jim carrey insufferable in this movie but my guy deserves credit for giving 200%
- i didn’t find the movie particularly funny at any point and in fact there were many bits i found just unbelievably cringe (the siberian dance off, for one - uptown funk is so old now?? the adventure pose maybe JUST saves it). i mean... did we really need a flossing reference in both movies
- but that negative stuff aside, this was just so clearly a movie by fans for fans and i honestly think that’s why critics dont like it. the audience of this film is either a) sonic fans or b) kids and there is no in-between
- on that note!! i was LIVING for the interactions between tails + knuckles + sonic, it’s such a blessed dynamic and i loved how they all got to individually play off each other.
- there were so many facets to knuckles too - his gullibility, his vulnerability, his longing for a family, his strength and honour, his ruthlessness... like they allowed him to be a bit dumb and clueless without making him a complete joke which i adored
- knuckles and sonic bonding over their difficult pasts and sonic not blaming knuckles for longclaw’s death was really nice? like sonic really didn’t want to fight him. and BABY KNUCKLES. knuckles’ dad! ken penders is losing his shit
- this movie was just so deeply and unashamedly earnest (even with the power of friendship stuff and emphasis on family!!) that i couldnt help but smile through most of it. 
- oh man, i just. all the clever references to the games?? the sonic 06 reference! the unleashed reference! even the thing with the chilli dog falling from the sky felt like a black knight reference!!
- seriously was losing my fucking MIND during the super sonic scene. it just encapsulated for me how long it feels since ive seen a movie like this that gives the fans what they want! I mean?? the chaos emeralds?? sonic’s design including the floating quills and the red eyes?? he looked soOOOO COOL
- knuckles talking about ice cream DID NOT DISAPPOINT. i really didnt expect them all to be just hanging out together at the end but that fucken killed me man
- GUN!!!
- TONED DOWN OLIVE GARDEN REFERENCES THANK YOU
- the human characters 100% got shafted but uhhh. i didnt mind it all that much?? and there was that huge moment with maddie and tom accepting sonic as their son and sonic talking tom dad like,.. that’s pretty important
- colleen was soooo good she just seamlessly slotted in and it was so nice to hear her voice throughout!!
- i loved seeing how the bits in the trailers were chopped and changed and moved out of context, it was cool to see how everything actually slotted together in the movie
- it was interestng how they’ve made it so the chaos emeralds are components of the master emerald rather than a separate thing? to the point where super sonic was said to have absorbed the power of the master emerald rather than the chaos emeralds... but its nbd tbh
- SHADOW SHADOW SHADOW!!!!! SHadoW!! he looked so good - if anything it looked like the red fur around his eyes was more obvious? he also looked kinda sad : ‘( i cannot wait to see his final design! so i assume the next movie is going to be pretty much just sa2 with a few changes? it doesnt really surprise me - shadow is just way too popular, and it felt like it was foreshadowed by the sa-2 on the gun helicopter. i like to think this means amy will be introduced too!
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kaz11283 · 3 years
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Of Course I'm Here
Characters: Come on you know by now how this goes (Loki x you) (Team x you, platonic)
Warnings: None. And really if you ever see anything that I might need to able as a warning please let me know... I'm the person who forgets there are people out there that get offened by the word F*** if that is an exapmle of anything.
Summary: Mid battle and the avengers keep looking for an answer as to why the God of Lies hasnt showed up yet. Of course you have no idea but at least he proves them all wrong.
ANNOUNCEMENT TIME: hey guys Im back, I know it hasnt been long but I also know I havent been posting every single day like I was, i got into a weird little funk where I didnt want to do anything, I was just feeling completly drained, and I felt bad because I have my little and I didnt even want to play with her because I have just been so TIRED, but I'm feeling better. Work has been kicking my ass here lately and ive been working over 50 hours a week so ive literally been coming in, eatting / feeding the little, getting us ready for bed, and crashing as soon as she falls asleep. But im here now. I will probably be more active on weekends than during the week because I have more time to spend working on stuff but I will be posting also during the week just not daily. At least until after state comes. Thank you so much for the reblogs, likes, comments, follows, and messages please keep them coming! If you would like to be tagged please ask or message, and requests are open. Love you guys so much! 💚💚💚💚💚
Loki Masterlist
~~~~~
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"Y/N, BACK UP I NEED BACK UP! EYES IN THE SKY!" Tony yelled from above, you and Clint stood back to back on a roof top shooting as many bad guys as you could. Clint took aim at another carrier, shooting at the engine causing the entire thing to blow up raining debris and hot metal around you.
"Damnit Clint! Farther away make sure they are farther away!" You yelled popping him on the head with an arrow before aiming it at the thing that was chasing Tony.
"Where is lover boy at? You.sent him the location right?" Nat asked into the com.
"Yes I sent him the location, no I dont know where hes at." You mocked.
"Did you send him the right location?" Sam asked.
"One time, one dam-"
"Language!" Steve chimed in causing everyone to groan. Gun shots where ringing all around you and you could here metal on metal paired with Hulk screams coming from another building over.
"Language." You mocked muting your com son that no one but Clint heard you. "I am a 26 year old woman, I think I'm old enough to cuss if I want." You drew back your bow and sent another arrow flying into another goon that had Nat trapped aginst a wall. She shot you a thumbs up before running off. You hit unmute on your com.
"Jesus, 26? Baby, you sure you don't need to be at a babysitter instead of on a building killing things?" He laughed.
"Dont worry Hawk, when we get done here I've already booked you a nice nursing home to be put into." You put your bow around you and stood on the edge of the building. "I need a better view." You looked round, the top of a taller building caught you eye. "There Hawk, we can cover a better radius from up there, get closer to the action."
"DOES ANYONE KNOW WHEN THE GODS ARE GOING TO BE HERE? WE NEED MORE HELP WERE GETTING TIRED AND OUT NUMBERED!" Tony came over the coms screaming.
"How do we get up there? Or do I even wanna know?" Hawk came to examin where you were talking about.
"Im jumping, you cant tell me that someone wont catch me." You shrug.
"GODS WHERE ARE TH- Y/N DONT YOU DARE JUMP!" Tony stopped and hovered right were you was standing.
"Then take us over there. We need higher ground, we cant cover everyone from down here." You crossed your arms.
"Where are the gods at y/n?" He asked again
"I. Dont. Know. Jesus you guys act like I'm suppose to be there keeper!" A simultaneous you are came from everone through the com causing you to roll your eyes. "Hes gonna be here I swear it! Now take me to the building or I jump. 1.....2....-" Tony grabbed you by the collar of your jacket and flew you to the building.
God these things were everywhere and you were starting to run out of arrows. After shooting another ship and causing it to blow you heard what was unmistakably pounding on the roof top door leading to where you currently was at.
"I have some univited guests about to join my party. Anyone available for some assistance?" You yanked out the two emerald green and silver daggars that your boyfriend had given you not long after you had started dating after throwing your bow around you.
"Buy some time kid, I'm on ground level right now but I can try to get up there as fast as possible." Bucky called over the com.
"Buy some time? Ok. I can do this. I work better from afar but a little hand to hand never hurt anyone, just easier to get stabbed this way." The first of the things busted through the door running straight at you. You jerked out of the way missing his staff by just a few inches. Quickly turning you flipped the dagger like Loki had showed you and stabbed him in his side causing him to fall to the ground before the next one tried to impale you.
"I have two daggers and they have freaking staffs! Back up! WHERE THE HELL AR-" you were interupted by static in the air and a bright light. The bitfrost had just opened up leaving to gods standing in front of you and taking out the remainder ofnthe bad guys. "HES HERE! I TOLD YOU GUYS THEY WERE COMING AND THEY'RE HERE." You pulled two extra coms from you pocket and gave them to Thor and Loki.
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"Always a pleasure to battle beside you Lady y/n." Thor smiled takkng the com and putting it in his ear before taking off again.
Loki sauntered over to you and put his arm around you waist, you put the com in his ear as he rolled his eyes. He leaned down and gave you a quick kiss.
"You got a new outfit." You smiled at him. God the way he looked in his battle clothe always did something to you, the horned helment was a plus.
"You like it." He smirked down at you pulling you closer.
"Your wearing your horns to." You reached up and brushed a peice if hair behind his ear.
"STOP. STOP NOW. WE CAN HEAR EVERYTHING AND ITS GROSS." Tony yelled causing you both to roll your eyes.
"Quick run down, bad guys everywhere, no end in sight, and I'm out of arrows pretty sure Hawk is too." Loki waved his hand over your quiver making more arrows appear.
"I see you had to use your daggers. I am sorry for not being here. Are you hurt anywhere?" He asked stepping away from you to examin you.
"Small cut on the side, nothing I havent dealt with before, Ill be fine. You go make sure Hawk is fully stocked up and help the others. I got a birds eye view of you right here." I leaned in kissing him one more time before smiling at him and pushing him away. He kissed his two finger before placimg them over his heart and you did the same, "always." You both said before he disappered.
You could hear Thor laughing at the chaos going on and Steve trying to direct the god of thunder on what to do. You had learned earlier to just let him do his own thing and he would be fine. Tony was still trying to micromanage everything when you heard Loki mumble something in an old language and his com cut out. You had figured it wouldnt have stayed on to long though but at least you had tried. It had calmed down up on your end so you decided to finally go back down to where Clint was at shooting an arrow with heavy duty rope you glided back down next to him to watch what was going on.
"Hello, earth to y/n." He snapped his fingers in front of your face. You had been to busy staring at Loki and that damn helmet. "I dont even understand why were friends." He rolled his eyes propping up on the ledge watching as the rest of the team secured the last of the bad guys.
"Because we both shoot arrows, because we are both the best in the team, or because we both know we are the best looking one on the team so we have to stick together." You laughed jumping up so you could sit on the ledge.
"The birds can come out of their nest now." Bucky called over the coms causing you both to sigh.
When you and Clint had reached the bottom you walked over to Thor theowing your arms around the big goof ball.
"You are amazing during battle as always." He beemed patting you on the shoulder.
"As always? Thor youve only fought with her twice." Steve said beside you.
"I had a week off. Went to Asguard, spent time with the boys. Someone had to keep them in line." You shrugged like it was no big deal.
"She was amazing!" Thor went on telling the story of the fight you had all gotten into.
"Mothers been asking about you by the way dear. Wants to know if you've decided to come stay for a while." Loki leaned down and whispered in your ear.
"I think I'm leaning toward a yes. I can't stand being away from you, you had been gone forever this time." You reached for his hand as you both walked to the quinjet.
"I was making arrangements to have our room redone. I figured you would come with me." He gave you a knowing smirk as he reached up to take off his helmet.
"Leave the horns on. I have a suprise for you when we get home." You pulled his hand away from his head and smacked his butt.
"You are a little minx." He laughed chasing you into the jet while the rest of the team groaned and rolled their eyes.
"Even if you wasnt moving i would be kicking your ass out! I am so sick of the PDA between you two." Tony hollared after you.
"Leave them alone Tony, they are courting. Im just glad my brother is happy and not trying to stab me." Thor clapped Tony on the back.
~~~~~
Tag List:
@kgirardin
@sophlubbwriting
@supbeeches
@high-functioning-lokipath
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curious-menace · 3 years
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Can you do headcanons of any Riddler getting cared for and gentle kisses from reader after getting beat up? He needs some loves.
SO I MAY HAVE SUGGESTED THAT MY ULTIMATE FANTASY IS TO GIVE RIDDLER A HUG WITH BACKRUBS AS HE TELLS ME ABOUT HIS DAY AND I STAND BY THAT WHOLE-HEARTEDLY .
i freaking love this stuff so im going to do all of them mwahahah
post asswoop riddlers getting loves
Arkham riddler
He’s VERY quiet, which knowing him and his inability to stop talking, is  bad news.
I paint arkham riddler as a cry baby and i stand by that. this is the hill i will die on. He’ll have dragged his sorry ass into your apartment or house , dripping blood on your floors but he wont bother calling for you. he’ll just sit at the table with his head in his hands having a lil pity party until you find him.
when you do finally get home, he’ll be looking like a kicked puppy. he’s gotten stuck in his own head, mentally beating himself up even more. he got a fright when you came in because he was so caught up he didn't even hear you at the door.
He’s literally sits there like a child with his arms up for you to come scoop him up. he’s not even sure why his first thought after getting beat up was to come here, he’s probably lead the cops here or something and that was so stupid and- you should probably give him a lil soft smooch on the head to stop him before he goes into a spiral.
he needs more emotional and mental care than physical. Talk to him while you're patching him up. any topic, it doesn't matter just keep him focused on your voice and not the one in his head calling him dumb.
he wont admit he wants to be held and coddled after something like this. get your softest blankie and 2 mugs of coco with marshmallows and just ramble at him. tell him about your day or ask him to explain something boring and complicated so he’s focusing on that rather than how upset he is. let him sit on your lap or between your legs on the sofa and watch how its made or mythbusters or something until he falls asleep. he should be ok again in the morning, he doesnt stay down for long. 
Blacklight Riddler
He’s used to getting his ass kicked, either by batman, the other rogues or once he’s a PI, by unhappy clients and the people he put away. He might be tiny but he’s pretty tough. 
even if he’s really hurting, his probably trying to crack jokes and tell blood and bruise related riddles. He doesn't like to see you worry so even if he’s in a lot of pain or a bit upset about things, he’s trying to make you smile.
he likes kisses on his bruises. even if he just banged his hand on the table he’ll come to you because he wants you to kiss it better. 
He’s a decent fighter, unlike a lot of riddlers who couldnt fight their way out of a paper bag. He can throw punches but he lacks in defence and with his bad knee, dodging can be a little hard. even if he wins the fight he’s still likely to need you to patch him up.
He likes kids plasters. like hello kitty and spongebob. no im not joking, he ALWAYS wanted them when he was little and his parents always said no. now he’s an adult he’s going to use them whenever he damn well pleases.
 if it was a particularly bad one, he’ll be ok in the moment even if he has to go to hospital. But he’s going to drop the facade at some point and let you see how upset he is. winding up in hospital after being beat was a common occurrence in childhood. even after doing it time and time again as an adult it doesn't make it any easier on him. he’ll want to stay in your bed, be close to you for few days until either he starts to heal or something snaps him out of his funk.
BTAS Riddler
he really prefers other people to do the fighting for him. well physically anyway. he can handle his own arguments...most of the time. He’s going to need you to nurse a bruised ego more than anything. he probably got dunked on my batman or crane and now he’s huffing.
i don't know if this counts as care and kisses but he clearly needs you around to keep his sorry ass alive. he hurt his side in a fight once and said he wasn't hurt. believable... until he started to act a little confused, a little dizzy. needless to say it worried you enough to take him to emergency care. 
He was obviously in agony by now but he was still fighting with you the entire drive there, insulting you and insisting he was fine. its a good job you took him when he did, turns out he’d ruptured his spleen and would probably be dead if you weren’t around to act like his common sense.
he still hasnt apologised for that. or any of the other times you insisted on medical care to stop him from pushing up daisies. he just pretends like you know he’s grateful so he doenst have to admit he’s bullheaded, stubborn and worst of all, wrong. 
if he has been seriously hurt, he acts more indignant about it than anything. he wants to be waited on and pampered while resting in bed. he can be a genuine pain to deal with, talking about how lucky you are to see him in such a vulnerable state and how you should be grateful he’s letting you do this for him.
He doesn't want to admit how much he actually needs you. his goons wont put up with him when he’s like this and he’s freaking paying them to do it. you do it for free and no matter how annoying he is you havent left him yet. he doesn't tell you but youve noticed he starts getting you more gifts about a week after he’s recovered. like its taken him a day or two to work out he should probably thank you for all you do.
Original Riddler
this riddler is just weird. like he gets a freaking hang nail and he pretends like he’s dying. but he could nearly lose a limb and he’ll say “tis but a scratch” and still try to hobble about like nothing is wrong.
actually he’s more like olaf “oh look i've been impaled.”. he probably tries to laugh off life threatening injuries like its nothing, taking maybe 3 steps before he collapses on his face in a blood puddle and lets out a tiny “help”
good luck moving his tall lanky ass around. better get a gurney and maybe those vets at the zoo who deal with giraffes. seriously if you want to take care of him you are going to need help or some sort of action plan and a go bag because with his limp butt this will not be easy.
he’s kinda like BTAS riddler in that he needs you to tell him the injury is serious. hes not dumb he just has a high pain threshold and genuinely doesn't realise that injuries are as bad as they are. 
he can be a bit of a baby while being patched up. he doesn't like a lot of blood or gore, it makes him feel a little sicky. better give him your phone to play with like a kid at the doctors or put the tv on for him to watch while you bandage  him. word of warning, he will pass out or throw up if you try to give him stitches.
i think you should focus your love and attention on him AFTER medical care. just focus on the job, be silent and as fast as possible to get it over with quickly. you should probably bring him something sweet too. no not just you, although you are sweet for looking after him. give him something sugary because he’s going to be light headed after seeing any blood. maybe you could give him a lolly for being a good patient. 
Telltale riddler
this riddler is essentially a metahuman. he can REALLY take a beating and bounce back fairly quickly. just look how many times batman punched him in the face and it barely stunned him! he doesnt usually need patched up after a fight. maybe just a lil smooch and some hugs
he did really need your help after the whole pact thing. having his friends abandon him hurt like hell, more than any physical injury ever could.
after that, he clings to you. almost obsessively so; we know he’s got some serious mental illnesses but he usually has the worst of it under control, even without meds. now? it seems like he’s experiencing ptsd and is afraid to go anywhere without you, like you might up and disappear if you arent in his line of sight at all times.
i think this riddler might need the most intense care from you. hugs and gentle reassurance wont be enough. you’re going to be responsible for taking him to therapy, keeping him taking his meds and grounding him to reality. this is the kind of responsibility you took on when you got involved with him but i doubt you realised how hard it would be. i cant promise it will all be worth it but i can promise he wont ever forget your kindness.
the kind of care he needs after such a hard knocking down is just stability. im not one for romance or any mushy gushy stuff but please just pour your love into the cracks in this poor mans soul.
its hard going, but he has his moments. his gallows sense of humor is still there and hey, after him being in and out and gone for so long, it might be nice to have him around more.  
Zero year riddler
INSUFFERABLE LITTLE SHIT THIS ONE. he could LITERALLY be bleeding out in your arms and he’d STILL be backseat driving on your medical skills. the temptation to just leave him there to bleed is INCREDIBLE.
he’ll drop the act eventually. he’ll ask and maybe even beg for your help. man has  no shame and all the self preservation instincts of a lemming. dont get me wrong, he can be a total coward some times, only looking out for himself . but when he’s actually hurt ? not a fuckin clue. does this head wound need an ice pack or heat pack? is this spurring blood wound worthy of medical care? no idea. he was a very sheltered child who never got so much as a bruise so he has no idea what to do when he’s hurt.
he gets the everloving shit kicked out of him on a clockwork basis. like you could hear knocking on your door at 3 am and already be at the table with a first aid kit like oh its tuesday riddler must have broken his nose.
he takes entirely too much joy in making you patch him up. youre starting to wonder if he’s doing it on purpose just to see you in your little apron and latex gloves . he’s getting off on this and you know it but god help you, you just  cant resist his dumb face asking for your help and would you also wear this pink nurses outfit while youre at it?
one time he lost a LOT of blood. he would be fine but he was pretty damn loopy from lightheadedness. while you were trying to get him into bed to rest he started flirting with you. can you believe the audacity? he’s lost 3 pints of blood and he’s still more focus on his libido? 
he’s actually going to be both humble and grateful for your help when he finally comes round. dont get me wrong, he’s still a bit of a prick but at least he says thank you for saving him before he demands you kiss all his booboos and ouchies. 
nonnie i am having a stroke. i was trying SO hard to just pick one but i COULDNT because i am WEAK for hurt and comfort.
theres a reason i have a tag that literally says “i have naughty hands and no self control”
someone needs to stage an intervention
got something you wana talk about? send me an ask or a dm! im always game to talk about our favorite curious menace 💚💜
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soup-du-silence · 3 years
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I feel like questions depend on what kind of funk you're in, if you wanna escape reality or chat I guess, so I'm giving options haha
Have you had any nice food lately? What's your go-to meals for treating yourself? What music are you listening to lately?
I don't have any particular questions I think, but I'm curious to know more about your writing process for GOK because I adore that fic to death and kind of want to know everything about how your brain works (even if that sounds creepy) How much structure did you have down before writing? What scenes were the hardest, and what were the easiest? Also just personal curiosity since my country neighbors to Sweden, why's Kjell swedish, do you have any connections to Sweden? this sounds like I'm coming for you HAHA but I'm just curious, its not often you get random Swedes in fics at all
also I scrolled your blog more than I have before and love absolutely everything you've written about headcanons, particularly the nsfw ones
oh man....i wish I could give some sort of insight into what was happening when I wrote GOK but if I knew what the fuck I was channeling when it was happening I'd have some kind of idea how to replicate it. A big part of it was always that Kenna's playlist made me feel Big Things about Alberto and I wanted so badly to put into words how insane her song choices made me feel. Like "why would you even choose these songs that are so obviously about unrequited love if thats not whats happening here do you think Im fucking stupid, Im going to lose my mind" and also when I started writing it I was frustrated with how slim the pickings were in the tag so I just wrote something that was transparently and unabashedly For Me. Now there's a lot of really good stuff out there that frankly makes me feel like a fraud and like I'm sitting at the kids' table. So it's been hard to get that drive back.
(I've been trying to work on something E-rated and hitting a wall on it which is disappointing because I think it would have been fun, but i think my whole "honest guys i'm actually not horny irl i promise" thing is catching up with me. I'm just not allo enough to commit to/be interested in/understand the kind of sex it calls for. Maybe I'll have to dial it back at start writing awkward teenage fumbling and work my way up from there.)
oh.....my god I dont remember why Kjell is Swedish?????? I think....I looked at a map of Europe and decided I wanted a boy who came from far enough away that he would look and feel distinctly Foreign to Alberto, so I settled on Sweden. I waffled a bit on where he was studying, he floated between France and Germany for a while, then I decided he was a music student so he landed in Austria. When my Italian sensitivity reader told me that Nordic people fucking loooove vacationing in northern italy, I knew Id made a good choice.
Fun fact: I know how Kjell is pronounced (Shell) but I literally cannot stop reading it how it looks to me. "Kyell." Im sorry, Swedes.
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cybercnu · 3 years
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Hi! I'm looking into disco influenced kpop songs and I keep coming across B1A4's Sweet Girl but when I listen to it it doesn't sound disco in the same way that say BTS' Dynamite sounded. I saw you mentioned it as disco recently and just wanted to ask what you think makes it disco? Thank you for your help!
hi! that sounds like a fun thing to do, and i just wanna say now that im no music expert so take everything i say w a grain of salt but it may answer ur question ? this is my uneducated opinion anyway lol
i feel like what you (and many other people who like kpop) get stuck on is that disco is one certain thing - its the heavy bass and a nice groove - but it's a rly diverse genre.
in dynamite you'll find that it's disco pop that rly emphasises the funk influence in disco such as the prominent bass line and the brass section as well as other things common in disco such as the choice of a muffled synth sound, the use of rhythm guitar and syncopated hand claps (actually the beat is rly similar to that of uptown funk which is a funk pop song lol)
overall i think the song was probably influenced a lot by give it up by kc and the sunshine band (which ive wondered for a while if the nananana's were a reference to that or not, they most likely are now i think about it more)
whereas in sweet girl it's more a sort of disco ballad/love song sort of influence. the string's in particular are very reminiscent of the type used in disco (not sure if they're synths or not tho), e.g. the string synths in night fever by the bee gees. again it's got that funk rhythm guitar which is giving us that disco 'chicken scratch' feel throughout the verses. it's not as prominent in this one as in dynamite but there is a brass sound during cnu's line leading up to the chorus as well as the ascending harmony in the intro, however i dont think it's real brass. the synth sounds used in the bridge are very disco and while lead guitar isn't used as much as rhythm guitar in disco, the guitar solo in it is reminiscent of that in hot stuff by donna summer so i don't think that makes it /not/ disco. also obviously the rapping isn't disco but i think we all knew that lol
anyway hope that answered ur question and it makes sense!
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mrskurono · 3 years
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Okay, so i saw you giving advice to someone and i would.like some to honestly-
So, like i never dated girls before (im a girl) i am pan but never dated a girl, and now, im going out with a girl, and shes not a dom/top and im neither, both being subs/bottoms, because we both never dated girls before this, yeah have 'it' is something we avoid, So like i have a date wih her on sunday. And shes been giving hints that she wants to do it. And i think im going to have to take lead(?) But if you could
what advice would you give to start on? Like how do i start? Do i take my time or what- because i always followed what my s/o said during those moments. Are they going to be different that shes a girl? Like im having a high-key panic attack.
Also, i love your blog! And honestly your fics give me comfort at times when dont want someone near, anyways, if your not willing to give advice it fine!
and could i be pilliow anon?
(The amount of times i have said 'like')
If I’m being honest the pressure to assign dom/sub roles in a relationship is neither here nor there in REAL LIFE relationships. The emphasis in fics to have that outline has kinda tainted the aspect (especially non heterosexual relationships) that someone needs to be dom and someone needs to be sub for things to work. Frankly in a real relationship neither matter. What matters is communication and enjoyment of it all.
Don’t think of yourself as a “dom” and just think of yourself as someone who’s excited to enjoy their first experience with their loved one. There doesn’t need to be a dynamic if you’re just open and the two of you communicate what is enjoyable and what isn’t enjoyable. Vocalize your needs as much as asking if she enjoys what you’re doing. Things like “Can you touch me here?” are as important as “Does this feel good?” Don’t expect her to read your mind and vice versa in this kind of thing. Since its your first time I’d honestly just ditch the entire notion that someone is dom or not (you can always introduce that later on if it’s something you enjoy) but stressing on the dom taking the lead part isn’t necessary. I didn’t know what I was doing the first time I was with my wife and it was less about who was top vs bottom and more about figuring out what worked and what felt good. 
Take it slow. Make sure you’re enjoying it as much as she is. Communicate needs and take the pleasure in enjoying your partners body. There’s not tested and true “method” to a first time. Kiss, touch, explore, be attentive and respond to things that she likes or things you both like. If she prefers one breast touched over the other then focus on that one. If she enjoys her thighs being rubbed then go with that. Everyone’s body is different and take this opportunity to literally get to know her better (I mean physical touch what more can you know about a person really) I’d say the only difference between being with a man vs a woman is women do tend to find the slower build up and foreplay important (I mean, you’re a chick so you got some of the idea do on y’know we like our necks kissed, boobs touched, that kinda stuff...not all women and not all men obviously but it’s a noticeable difference between sexual encounters between both) 
Just trust your gut. If you guys are getting heated and you wanna kiss her neck then by god kiss her neck. If you wanna touch her and she’s responsive to it definitely go for it! There’s no right or wrong way and just taking the time to ease into it is really all I can suggest. No one gets it right off the back so being able to tell one another what the other likes is super important. 
And yes pls be my cloud anon!! <33 Sorry I havent posted much I’ve been in a funk v.v
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doxiedreg · 3 years
Text
Yeah I think Im just plain old art blocked I can only do mindless headshot or bust doodles but I cant come up with good poses or expressions so everything looks super basic I probably should do studies for a bit to remedy it but dsjkfd looking for the right stock photos is hard
on top of that I am also dealing with anxiety, executive dysfunction, fatigue and a feeling of being unsatisfied and lowkey sad. I hate being in funks like this, I want to make stuff aaa. But yeah that's what im dealing with. Big sad
I just feel the creative spark right now. I normally let my passion/gut/heart guide me in everything I do. But when Im feeling empty, there isnt much to go off so my executive dysfunction gets real bad and I am unable to do anything meaningful and that makes me more sad and sghkgkflgfl. But I will be okay. Im stable. Just..in a funk. Which is very annoying but im sure it will pass. Maybe its seasonal depression coming on? I should probably start using my daylight lamp again. Lots of things I should do but it’s hard to make myself do them because my brain is stubborn and stupid like that ugh. Old behaviour is coming back and I dont like it.
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