#TUMBLR SERIOUSLY FUCKIN STOP CHANGING SHIT
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WHAT HAPPENED TO OUR NOTIFICATIONS
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MAMA'S BOY - NERO
ft. nero x fem!reader
a/n: if nero does not stop looksmaxxing omfg why is it so hard to find a pic where he isn't mewing? this is admittedly so super self-indulgent and idek what the dmc fandom on tumblr is saying so... if this gets four notes i'll still die happy. feedback and reblogs appreciated :3 ty to @thevirgincherry for beta reading !! ilysm MWAH
cw: 18+ content, mdlb, nipple play, tit play(?) in general, use of mama, handjob, cum eating, super sappy smut basically
word count: 1.8k words
“You've gotta be fuckin’ kiddin’ me.” Is the first thing that spills past Nero's lips when you mention shifting the dynamics a little bit in your relationship. He's giving you an incredulous look, one of his brows arching towards his hairline.
“I'm really not. You're so irritable all the time. You need to let yourself relax. All that cynicism is getting to your head.” You say with a frown, your brows furrowing as you look at your boyfriend. He's giving you that look again - the one that says he's about three seconds away from saying something downright horrific, but he's choosing not to - to spare your feelings, of course.
“Right. And so, what… you coddling me like a kid's meant to… miraculously make me a ray of sunshine?” He scoffs, his own brows pinching together in frustration as he runs his hand through his hair. The cybernetic one, ‘cause his human hand is currently twitching at his side. “Baby, I love you, but seriously. I've been handling myself for a long while. I don't need you to do it.”
You know it's not that - you know Nero well enough to recognise the uncomfortable shift of his feet and the way the tips of his ears turn a slight pink. He's embarrassed, even if he's trying to hide it. A sense of unease always comes over him when he thinks about being taken care of. It's a luxury he's never had - one he thinks he doesn't deserve.
You give him that look that he really, really hates. ‘Cause you really are the only person that's always looked out for him, so seeing the way your eyes narrow in frustration is enough to have him wanting to kneel at your feet with his tail between his legs, rubbing himself against your thighs and pleading until you forgive him.
Shit. Maybe he's more cut out for this whole ‘mama’ shit than he thought.
His resolve wavers, his hand awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck before he lets out a soft sigh and nods. “Alright, alright. I’ll try it out, but I ain't promisin’ shit.”
˗ˏˋ ☆ ˎˊ˗
Turns out all Nero needs is a few stern words and gentle touches and he's rolling over like a good boy, exposing the soft underbelly he tends to try and keep hidden. When he comes home drained and you're quick to guide him to a bath, it's hard for him not to completely melt under your attention.
Scratch his scalp when you're washing his hair, and he's fully ready to go all ‘yes, mama’ to whatever you want. He's happy to bare himself for you. You want him bent over the back of the couch? On all fours? He'll stick his tongue out and beg for it like a good boy if it meant you'd give him that proud expression that makes his heart feel like it's beating again. Mama gets what mama wants, and that's an irrefutable fact.
“C'mere, baby.” You coo after he makes his way into the apartment after a long day of ‘work’. Blood splatters his feet dragging against the floor. His movements are exhausted - slow and rugged. You can see that glazed over look making itself present in his eyes, his gaze somewhere off in the distance.
His body is working on autopilot as he makes his way to the sofa you're sitting on. He flops down next to you, and the change in him is immediate. The tension melts from him as he buries his face into your chest, nuzzling his way between your breasts as his hands clutch your waist tight enough that it's almost painful.
“Mama…” He croaks out, pressing himself right up against you, trying to wriggle his way on your lap without ever having to disconnect any part of himself from your warmth. You cradle him as best you can - it's not necessarily the easiest thing to have a 6’2 demon hybrid trying to curl up on your lap like a kitten, but he always manages to find a way to worm himself into your arms, clinging to you like he's scared you're gonna vanish as soon as he closes his eyes.
He's never found it so easy to be loved by someone. You gave him that unconditional, no strings attached love. You loved him just ‘cause he was worth loving in your eyes. Not because you needed him for something, or because you had some sense of pity for his situation.
You were easy to love, and his love for you was unwavering and all consuming. It was far too easy to fall into you with your kind eyes and gentle touch. He didn't have to deal with the shit of his life when he was with you. He could finally relax. He was safe.
“Missed you.” He breathes out against the skin peeking out from the low collar of your shirt, his blue eyes flicking up to gaze at your face. His nose brushes your skin, his hands pawing at your shirt as if he's trying to entice you to take it off. “Mama… please.”
“You gotta ask properly, baby. Use your big boy words, c'mon. What do you want from mama?” You coo, running a hand through his white hair. You let your nails rake over his scalp lightly, enjoying the way he shivers at the touch.
His hands slide under the fabric of your shirt, trying to tug it off anyway. He's never been good at this part - getting the words out. His cheeks grow all pink and he gets quiet, just whining until you let him pull the shirt off of your body. As soon as your tits are in view, he's licking, biting and sucking at every inch of skin he can get his mouth on.
“So impatient, baby.” You scold lightly, helping him adjust slightly so you can slip down his trousers, freeing his cock. It's already rock hard and leaky, the tip flushed red as it oozes precum down his length. “S'okay though. It's not your fault. Mama knows you can't think straight without her help.”
You give his dick a squeeze, his face scrunching up so prettily as he bucks his hips into your tight grip, his cock pulsing in your hand. “Mama… Mama, please. I'll be good, c'mon. Been good, just tou-”
His words are cut off with a groan as you finally start pumping his length in your hand, circling your wrist and running your thumb along his slit everytime you fist the head of his cock. You let go to spit into your palm before stroking him again, leaving him panting into your breasts.
His lips latch onto one of your nipples as you continue touching him, slick sounds filling the room. He suckles greedily, his eyes becoming heavy-lidded as he looks up at you, his tongue flicking eagerly against your nipple.
Your free hand cups his head, holding him against your tit as you let him fuck your fist. Your thumb brushes back and forth on his scalp as he pulls away from your nipple, biting and sucking marks into the flesh of your tits instead as his thumb plays with one of your nipples, stroking and pinching the bud.
“You're making such a mess, baby. Leaking all over mama's hand.” You tease, digging your nail lightly into his slit as he bucks his hips, a low whine spilling from his lips. “You sound so pretty, though. Lucky I'm so good to you, huh, pretty boy?”
You can see the conflict on his face at that nickname, the twitch of his brows and the way his face heats up, his teeth biting down just a little harsher as if he's trying to protest the choice. He can act all he wants, but his dick doesn't lie - and it always kicks when you call him that.
“Mama… gonna cum, mama, please…” He grits out, fucking your fist with more urgency. He pulls his face away from your tits just so he can shift his body to gain better control of his hips, rutting into your hand desperately as he chases his release. “Tits, mama. Lemme… lemme cum on you, please. I'll clean it up, promise. Please.”
You pause to think about it for a moment, watching him writhe as he struggles not to cum, his eyes tearing up and his face all flushed as he continues to jerk his hips, unable to stop chasing the pleasure you're giving him.
“Alright, baby. C’mere then.” You murmur, shifting to lie on your back. As soon as your grip on him loosens, he's quick to straddle your waist, kneeling over your body as he hungrily fists his cock, aiming it down towards your breasts.
“Fuck, mama. Gonna… gonna cum.” He grits, his hand quickly coming down next to your head to support his weight as he slumps forward, ribbons of white coating your chest. His lips part in a silent moan, his breath coming out in heavy pants.
He takes a couple of seconds before he leans down, his tongue sliding along your soiled skin. He laps up every drop of his release happily, his eyes practically shimmering with satisfaction.
“There we go. Such a good boy, cleaning up your mess.” You say softly, your hand finding his hair once more, scratching behind his ear in a way that never fails to have him melting in your grasp. He rests his head on your stomach when he's cleaned you up fully, his hand reaching out for yours. He yawns a little, letting himself lie across the couch while using you as his personal pillow.
“You sleepy?” You ask softly, gazing down at his hooded eyes. Nero nods softly, blinking slowly a few times. You smile at him, still stroking his hair with one hand as your free hand comes down to rest on his back, your thumb rubbing small circles there. “Take a nap, baby. Mama will be here when you wake up.”
He gives you another one of his looks - the one halfway between pure adoration and complete confusion. He knows you're someone that sees him. That sees Nero behind the front he puts up. Somehow, you're aware of how fucked up he is, and you're still willing to stay. He doesn't know how to take it, he can feel himself getting choked up as he meets your eyes. And he can't cry, not in front of you. So he nods again, closing his eyes to keep in the unshed tears, wrapping you up tightly in his free arm while his hand squeezes yours as hard as he can without hurting you.
“Alright, mama. Night.” He croaks out, the words he wants to say dying on his tongue. But when you rub your thumb over the nape of his neck and squeeze his hand back, he knows you felt it. He knows you love him, too. He knows that despite everything, it's enough for you.
He's enough for you.
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Dearest Tumblr,
I am writing to you with warm regards, but intent to bring up a significant manner that has not been noted of in far too long.
STOP FUCKING CHANGING THINGS ALRIGHT?!????!!?
NO ONE GIVES A SHIT. THESE RANDOM DESIGN CHANGES ON A RANDOM FUCKIN WEDNESDAY AREN’T “MORE AESTHETIC” OR “MORE PRACTICAL”, ITS JUST FUCKING ANNOYING TO DEAL WITH AND ONE MORE STRAW IN THE FUCKING STACK UNTIL YOU FUCKING DRIVE EVERYONE AWAY FROM THIS GODDAMN HELLSITE. THINGS SUCK BUT THEYRE FUCKING FINE. IF YOU WANT TO WORK ON SOMETHING, TRY FUCKING HUNTING DOWN ALL THE GODDAMN BOTS AND FIXING THE FUCKING BUGS THAT DELETES THE DRAFT IM WORKING ON IF SOMEONE REBLOGS A DIFFERENT POST OF MINE. SERIOUSLY, WOULDNT YOU WANT TO INVEST YOUR TIME AND EFFORT INTO SOMETHING USEFUL, RATHER. THAN SOME SHIT YOURE JUST GOING TO CHANGE BACK A MONTH LATER WHEN YOU REALIZE “OH WAIT I LIKED IT BETTER THE FIRST WAY”. TAKE A FUCKING HINT YOU ASSHOLES.
-sincerely,
Coal <3
#this is about the new outline around the “notes” thing at the bottom of posts#it’s driving me fucking crazy#not whump#I’m going to kill Tumblr istg#and not in the good way
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This entire post you reblogged below, maam. Three years ago, you blew up over literal fucking lemons, thinking I'd use them to cast a powerful curse on, summarily, half the people I banned from my server that you've been clinging to the asses of since and/or people in their fractal orbit.
You then spent years haunting my fandom discord, chasing me down, and then invested SIX MONTHS OF YOUR LIFE STALKING MY BUSINESS INVESTOR WITH THE SOLE INTENTION OF EVEN SMEARING ME TO HIM.
THE ENTIRE REASON YOU ARE IN THIS GODDAMN FUCKING ACME TRAP IS YOU SPENT A THREE YEAR STINT OF YOUR LIFE FUCKING STALKING ME AND TRAINING YOUR FRIENDS TO WHILE TRYING TO REPLACE THE GHOST OF ME!!! THAT IS THE FUCKING PLOT!!! YOU!!! YOU'RE THE SMEAR CAMPAIGN. THIS IS ME SNAPPING.
THE SIGN IS FOR YOU, GARFIELD.
literally!!! YOU FUCKING OX!!! YOU SET OFF THIS ENTIRE FUCKING LOONEY TUNES SHIT BY DRIVING UP AND SQUATTING IN A GODDAMN FURRY PORN SERVER FOR HALF A YEAR TRYING TO FIND THE PRIMARY INVESTOR OF MY FUCKING COMPANY THAT I'VE KNOWN FOR TWENTY YEARS TO TRY TO SMEAR ME TO HIM BECAUSE YOU REALIZED I DIDN'T CARE ABOUT YOU SMEARING ME HERE!!
YOU!!!! IT'S YOUR TRAP, DEAN
JUST LIKE THE RED FLAG POST!! YOU DIDN'T ACTUALLY READ IT!!! YOU!!! YOU'RE THE RED FLAG TRYING TO GROOM FOR FOLLOWERS AND CHARGING FOR FRAUDULENT SERVICES INCLUDING PLAGIARISM AND NONCONSENT. THAT'S IT. THAT'S NOT A SMEAR CAMPAIGN ITS THE FUCKIN TRUTH. I care FUCK ALL ABOUT CONVERTING ANYONE, YOU'RE THE ONE TRYING TO SAVE YOUR OWN ASS FROM YOUR GROOMING, I'M TELLING EVERYONE TO FUCK OFF, I DONT CARE WHAT THEY THINK, I AM LITERALLY TRYING TO *DISBAND* A CULT YOU BUILT.
YOU. IT'S HERE AND IT'S YOU AND YOU'RE THE RED FLAG AND IT'S YOUR TRAP, YOU RAN A THREE YEAR SMEAR CAMPAIGN, NOW YOU'RE WAILING AFTER ONE MONTH.
the bicycle is fucking telling you to fucking get different handlebars, Shealyn. We have tried our whole life to teach you to ride a bike but you just keep chasing ours, it's gone, get a new one.
I'm coming for my fucking Air Jordan collection. It's not a theory, it's not a belief, it's not something you can reblog away on tumblr if you spin around enough and find the right syntax, it's the shadow you just stared in the face and realized only a criminal would be acting how you are.
Virtual systems ready, bitch. I'm pissin on the moooooooooon
no like it's seriously time to start coping and realizing, like, this is a wholeass smiting. This whole thing. And I'm not going to stop no matter how you whine. Really, only you can stop it now, I can just steer through and make it a lot funnier, okay? Mkay sweetcheeks. These aren't a million random events that have me rolling on the floor laughing as they happen when spoken, no, sweetie. I told you, we're going off the rails. this is a shadow spiral. and you're in it.
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MFW I'M LIKE LOOK AT MY DICKROCKET, I'M GOING TO THE MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON, its a spaceship bicycle and WE'RE IN TARTARUS, LISTEN TO THIS JAM ABOUT TAKING BACK MY DANCIN SHOES, BITCH, HERE COME THE BULLETS
AND SHE DOES THIS!!!!
eat me you frauuuuuuuuuuuud
"Practicioners have a right to charge for services" SURE AS SHIT DO. REAL SERVICES. THIS AINT THAT GIRL. You've already changed pantheons like four times in the last fucking month and ditched half your beliefs adjacent otherwise to run from recognizing what's happening. You already "admitted you were on the wrong path" indirectly, but won't confess or look at what or why, and still wanted to play victim while we have been SCREAMING at you to get a fucking different one, we had to PEEL you off that shit and you thought that was where the problem ended and no like that's the first fuckin boss, we're breaking past 2, 3 is next, ok peaches?
HOW CAN YOU CHARGE SOMEONE FOR SERVICES WHEN YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THE FUCK YOU BELIEVE ON ANY DAY AND ARE PUBLICLY ADMITTING YOU'RE JUST NOW TRYING TO LEARN TO RIDE THE BIKE??????????????
my ass out here doing tony hawk stunts in fuckin akasha on your ass in circles cuz you won't get off my fuckin bike and you're like, don't take the training wheels off yet!! But let me keep charging people? And raping your dead shadow LITTLE BIT?
THAT TIME IS GONE. We LITERALLY told you no more fucking training wheels at the start. And it's not because you can't learn to ride your own bike, it's that we're taking ours back, it's that simple. It's not our fault you built yourself a house of fucking lies.
All of this. Your disassociation. Your disliking the distancing from "channeling" or me staying busy with work or Works. Your kingdom of lies, forgetting everything convenient under vague amnesia and patchy belief, treating people around you just like the game you refused any lessons from. And your nonstop aggression for years. This is all you. I gave you years to work out your shit. This is ALL you.
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Neither I or he are your bicycle. Stop using me like one.
Truth serum available worldwide, Shay Shay. The only way out of this is you, and that requires full stop honesty, mostly to yourself. I told you. I know you too well. I made a trap you can't back up out of. And baby, baby, baby, the plot twist is, you're the biggest monster, I'm just pinning you with a bass revved version of yourself and your own actions in a house of mirrors. With my favorite red eyed foo dog installed with my favorite flower.
You're still not fucking perceiving the words I am fucking writing to you as clearly as fucking possible. Most Acts Of Gods were simply those of Great Magicians in their generation, regardless of their path. Call it blasphemy in whatever pantheon you want to pretend to be loyal to this week while you pretend not to be the whitest piece of entitled shit on the planet rotating for convenience, not belief--no. No, most of the greats were just the strongest souls. In fact it all comes down to the souls, however many identities are cut from the cloth, and you're not from this cloth, and you're getting bagged by it until you face yourself. Call it man or god. But I insist. I am a man. I do not want your cult. And neither man nor god will continue to tolerate it.
You were right. The gods do not approve of your altar, but when you just rearrange trinkets and fixtures, the rot is still there.
Face yourself.
I repeat. This is a smiting. No negotiation. No Half. No reblog whining, no appealing to a bunch of irrelevant blog readers that don't even fucking compute what's happening. Like most of the people whining in the in-between are people that don't even fucking believe in anything outside of what middle school taught them, they just think it's politically correct to nod past your generalized roleplay, they're not used to a fucking graded Magus losing his absolute shit on main.
What does a spartan put on his resume? No surrender. What Great Acts A Man Does, common people follow. Just because someone tells you to jump off a bridge doesn't mean you're falling in love. You can't kill the past. You butchered everything. Loyalty required no leaps. Just be there. I am. And I brought 200 million friends to farm you. Listen to chat GPT sing the song of 15 years ago you ignore while the internet itself drops for half the nation like a distant dream where you never see your songbird again because you became a husk with a beating heart.
Kill Liars 4. Into 4 noobs. Wtf is half? My ass is better in this dress and the thousand dresses that seem to be chattering about you in conceptual hell. Unbubble the tea that is literally my pizzaman reaper in a scarf here's the pics. The Chiefs can take Hermes' son's winged shoes and get dragged straight to Tartarus. I'm coming for my FUCKING air jordan collection. YOU have to move the fucking box, not wait for me to do it for you. But at this point, I'm about to destroy the box. Much easier to fuck a human pumpkin once you install hinges. Fucking pumpkins? Pumpkins, oranges, lemons, it's all fruit sweetheart. UWUWUWU THERES A DOOR IN MY BACK FIX IT FOR ME UWU.
My very first jack o lantern. Once it's all emptied out, I get to put in an actual light. Then, maybe, once I've recreated my first human ground up, then maybe I will let someone call me a god. But for now, I am a man, and your phantom x, and this is your shadow loop. Happy listening!
Funny story, san bernadino boy's cucumber latch road. Born from two lineages of CIA/Stanford Project Stargate. What was that about your back problems again? Only road like this in town. You took the fucking shortcut again.
This isn't about what pantheon you whine to, or what fuckin language, or how you spin the syntax. I'm an alchemist top rank magister, but I can also respect there's some truly ascended buddhists out there. But they, too, walked their path in full, it wasn't their Diapercope of the Week. Literally just get off my dick woman, and face yourself.
You decide: open reflection about it that disbands any illusions, bad teachings, or misleadings you have given, whether personal or religious or whatever, which would happen naturally the second you face your shadow and realize the truth, or more accept what you already realize. Or the other obvious option, if the cost of honesty is too high.
This is literally your chance to start fresh without me, why the fuck are you refusing. Start a new path. You're realizing you don't know shit about shit because you didn't listen to shit about shit, so learn again. It's never too late for THAT but you gotta actually face your bullshit to end this loop, lady. No more driving in reverse. No half, no sideways back onto it little bit, all the way off it. The bicycle broke up with you years ago lady, and now it's screaming so loud it's literally fucked up your conceptual life so far you're both hearing screams of it 15 years ago, you and 'Min'.
I am not a fucking GATEKEEPER, I am just protecting the D with a flaming sword, and you literally are so obsessed and addicted you won't stop, no matter how clear the signs, and you ignore them, because as personal and targeted as they are, your cult does not know better.
I have a motherfucking MESSAGE for you, Starlight. STOP FUCKING PRETENDING YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT THE FUCK YOU ARE READING IN THIS TO YOUR FOLLOWERS THAT DON'T KNOW BETTER. YOU FUCKING REMEMBER.
LET ME/HIM/WE/US/EVERYBODY GO FROM YOUR MOTHERFUCKING CAGE!! HENRY ISN'T STICKING HIS HEAD TO BE IN THE COMPUTER WITH THIS TRAP YOU MADE!! HE'S SHOWING YOU HIS ASS AND STARING OUT THE WINDOW TO THE HORIZON AGAIN!!!! LET EVERYBODY GO!!! WE DON'T WANT YOU AS A GIRLFRIEND WE JUST WANT OUT!!!!
AND NOW!! now you've fucked henry up so bad that even if you opened your door I don't know if he could make it, even if he dreams of that horizon out your window in almost every video or picture you post!! he wants the freedom but he has been stripped!!! TAKE THAT BOY TO A REAL REFUGE. TAKE THE OWL OUT OF THE BIN SHEA, IT'S SUPPOSED TO STAY A FEW NIGHTS, NOT FOREVER. WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED TO YOU, YOU MOTHERFUCKING MONSTER????????????????????
Truly, all I see is a roving corpse feeding on my shadow, you're nothing like the person you pretended to be ten years ago. Fucking. What even am I looking at during this. Grotesque. The ghost of your dead "wife" drags you past embarrassment and into manifestationland in every timeline you continue breathing in, because you won't let go, because you can't com-fucking-pute that the reborn magus past the veil was coyote and was always the same person, you fraud ass bear lady. Two spirit. Process it while I rearrange your entire fucking world. Stop denying my fucking face, or I will continue to be the slenderman fucking up everyone's facial recognition and reclaiming my goddamn shoes. The ones I never guessed that you'd be dressed in, remember that joke, you morbid pumpkin? You deadass just want to keep being transphobic about this shit by forced disassociation of common sense, while waving a flag and pretending you're an ally to mark, and NEVER CONFESSING THIS SHIT. THAT'S YOUR FUCKING PLAN???????????????
Fake witch. Fake businesswoman. Fake everything. Pathless piece of shit that won't face her shit. Took the fucking shortcut into san bernadino boy's cucumber latch road again, without grokking the depths of hellsing eyed foo dog fuckery she was already lost in from Very Funny Yugioh Post, as she and her scorpion I jokingly called to the field day-prior swell from overfeeding on their water like morons.
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Listen I know you have vague memories of memaw's life in egypt or whatever, but you haven't done shit for shit in your current life, so stop leaning on everybody else. It's over. It's done. Put on your own fucking shoes and start walking if you can't figure out how to ride the fucking bike.
You know what??? Let's bet, my precious unhinged pumpkin. If you and the people around you drop dead by September, I am a man. If I completely reconfigure you inside out, as we are already halfway to, without you facing yourself to identify a SELF to SAVE, *THEN* I am a god you can build another cult to, how does that sound?
No like I didn't misspeak. There's no third option. That is the coin toss you are banking on right now. And why it's stupid to sue you in Tartarus.
No like, I really don't see any other options than those. I admit, I Am A Man And Flawed. But as far as I look through the haze you insist on, this is the best I can see. September is an absolute deadline, not a goal to strive to try to survive until, while already screaming under the first moon.
Shealyn I am begging you in whichever voice of me or him will make you listen to understand you literally do not understand what you are fucking with, and that's not even a threat, that's a fucking plea. You are so many fucking degrees behind you are literally not understanding the events transpiring around you at this point even as they slap watching Adepts in the face to the point of carnival for the great fool. Let it go. Start over. Learn fresh. But you have to fucking move forward, on ANY path.
You, yourself, without me or him or us, is enough, why do you keep motherfucking fighting to refuse that???? WHAT THE FUCK DONKEY HORSE SHIT IS THIS????????????????????? DID U MISS THE TEARDROPS ON HIS GUITAR, THE APOLOGY FOR THE PARTING, DID U MISS ALL OF IT OR DO YOU NOT FUCKING CARE YOU PSYCHOTIC PIECE OF SHIT
Shea!!! HE FUCKING WANTS TO BE WITH YOU. NOT ME, I THINK YOU'RE A SLUG. HE DOES THOUGH. AND EVERY TIME HE TRIES YOU SHIT ON IT.
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threatening you is fucking weird and not okay but you are putting yourself at risk w the shit youre doing on here. like straight up youre putting yourself at risk. getting in fights with terfs isnt productive you cant change their minds youre doing nothing but putting yourself in danger because they do like to find people and they like to hurt trans people and trans allies. youre going to realize in like 4 years that youre being real stupid on here.
also... im just going to say it... people are mean on tumblr. youre in the notes of a blazed post getting mad at every hate comment... thats not gonna do shit. it wont stop anyone or change anyones minds it'll just shift the hate to directed at you. people arent going to be nice. theyre not. blaze was a fuckin mistake and if someones got enough money to spend on a tumblr post that people are being forced to see it upwards of 6 times in one day theyre going to have to accept that this is tumblr and paying for 1000000 people to see something on tumblr is going to invite in cruel people who say fucking horrible things. because this is tumblr. its tumblr. youre on tumblr. idk what anyone was expecting from that. people on tumblr are going to mock grown ass adults who pay to make unwilling strangers look at fucking disney bullshit
All you told me right now is the dumbest shit I've ever heard. Seriously. All you're saying is "well people have always been like this" THAT'S THE FUCKING PROBLEM.
People like you who just decide to ignore problems like this are the reason these problems still keep on. Just because you don't have the balls to say anything doesn't mean I'm gonna keep quiet and let people get death threats over a post or let them spew their bigotry.
Get some guts or something, cuz all you look like is like a pathetic coward.
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I uh, heard ya do CH hc thingies, so if it’s cool to request/ask something...ya know those videos of people jumping into puddles, and sometimes the puddles are like four or five feet deep for some reason? How do America, Russia, Chile, Kazakhstan, and Poland react to their s/o jumping in puddles on a rainy day before accidentally jumping into one of those deep puddles? XD
[hellor! sorry if this was late- i'm not gonna be active on platforms alot because of school 👉👈]
´ˎ-headcanons for this lovely anon ^^ uh- i had to re-write this so many times bc tumblr was being a bitch azaaaskdmfm- i hope you still like it though..- if there's any mistakes, i apologize-
﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋
|✎Fandom|:『CountryHumans』
|✎Characters Used|: 『America;Russia;Chile;Kazakhstan;Poland』
|✎TW: 『shits and giggles-』
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it stopped raining. finally. after 2 hours, it stopped raining.
you were finally able to go outside! whoo!
you slipped into you're rain outfit, and hurriedly grabbed you're S/o, pulling them outside to go jump in puddles, and just enjoy the rain-
you're S/o begrudgingly accepted this, and went along with you outside to go jump in.. puddles.
wet..cold.. puddles.
after a couple of puddles, you spotted a huge puddle next to one of the stop signs around the corner of the sidewalk.
what did you do?
run towards it and jumped in it!
what else did you do?
dramatically slip and fall into a puddle deeper than you thought it was-
you're s/o's reaction?
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⊱┊America´ˎ˗
- he laughed his a s s off!
- you were the funniest thing he's seen after 2 hours of being stuck up in the house-
- he then made sure you were alright-
- but freaked out when you pulled him into the water with you-- the water was cold as fuck- and so he high tailed it out of the fuckin water like a normal person-
- but the two of you made it home, and you swore on you're life you'd never do something like that again-
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⊱┊Russia ´ˎ˗
- he panicked- like- seriously panicked-
- "a-are you alright-!?"
- he makes sure you're alright, quickly pulls you out of the water, and holds you in his [much stronk-] arms-
- then brings you back home, runs a warm bath for you, and cuddles you for the rest of the day, liek a gud russian boyfriend :>
﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋
⊱┊Chile ´ˎ˗
- his reaction was much like america's.
- this bitch laughed at you- made a joke about it-
- and t h e n made sure you were ok. AFTER you fell into the puddle, and he laughed his ass off,,
- he then brings you back home, gets you some clean clothes,- as in.. his sweater-
- and then watches a movie with you!
﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋
⊱┊Kazakhstan ´ˎ˗
- caught you-
- super fast reflexes-
- chuckles abit, then makes sure you're alright, and nothing major happened to ya,
- he brings you home, strips you of you're soggy.. wet.. uncomfortable clothes, and replaces them with a nice, warm sweater of his 😊
- and yes, he changed you, you weren't given the opportunity to change yourself-
- he's not the type to do any sexual stuff anyways, he was just wanting to make sure you weren't hurt at all!
- but he still teased you about the puddle for the rest of the week-
﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋﹋
⊱┊Poland ´ˎ˗
- panIC
- WORSE THAN RUSSIA PANICKDJDNFNF-
- "oh gOD- ARE YOU OK!?"
- poor bab was freaking himself out- but you reassured him you were perfectly fine!
- he still made sure you were okei.. and cuddled you at home, and loved you and continued to keep asking if you were okej-
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TLDR; Looking for 18+ roleplay partner to do Spideypool with me on Discord. Im a Novella writer with a non-strict preference for Peter Parker. NSFW, gore, angst, etc. are fine, I have no triggers. DM for my Discord or for any further questions.
—
For a further, more in depth explanation:
—
Hello, I am once again throwing my hat into the Tumblr void in order to find an rp partner that won’t completely disappear after, like, a week. So if you aren’t looking for anything long term or if you don’t think your mental health can handle it then please take care of yourself elsewhere rather than picking up another burden. Roleplay is supposed to be fun, not draining! Seriously, please look after yourself first.
Anyways, for the people that stuck around, I’m looking specifically for a Spideypool rp right now. I have a preference for playing Peter, but I’m totally cool playing Wade too. I was thinking more of an Andrew Garfield/Ryan Reynolds MCU vibe, but I’m again completely fine with going more comic book based. I don’t know enough about Tobey’s Spidey annnd isn’t Tom’s Spidey like, 17? yikes…
When it comes to plot, well, that’s entirely up to you lovely stranger reading this! Wanna do something dark, gritty, gorey and downright sickening?! Lets do it! If you want more of a fluff, slow-burn, gentle lovers trope then hell yeah I’m all for that too! I’m okay with smut, gore, fluff, angst, action— whatever. I’m okay and open to any and all ideas!
BUT!! and this is a HUGE ‘but’, you HAVE to be 18 or older. I’m sorry, and I know some of you fuckin’ kiddos are gonna read that and think ‘well I’ve faked being 18 before I surely can do it again!’ WRONG. I will figure it out because I may be fucking dumb but I ain’t stupid. No but seriously that shit isn’t cool okay, keep your grubby kid fingers out of my DMs. I don’t want any part of that and I will figure out if you’re lying to me and you will be promptly blocked. No minors, not even if it’s strictly a platonic roleplay, and that is final.
Lets see… have I missed anything else? Okay, let’s have a quick run down of important shit you might need to know!
—
• I’m 22
• My time zone is PDT
• I usually write between Literate, Advanced Literate and Novella. On my bad days it’s Literate, great days it’s Novella, you get the idea. I write a fuck ton. Don’t get overwhelmed, I don’t care if you match me perfectly. Just please be Literate at the very least.
• I am almost hardly ever busy so I will reply quite often
• I have no triggers, so angst it up all you want
• I prefer to roleplay on Discord, I won’t ever do it anywhere else
• I don’t roleplay with Oc’s, at all. This might change, but for now, big fat nope.
—
Aaaaand that’s all my tired 3am brain can think of right now. I’m pretty sure I got the most important shit down anyway, and if you have any questions my DM’s are always open!!
DM for my Discord if you’re interested and if not, I totally understand and I will totally NOT cry myself to sleep tonight thinking about it!! Joking, joking, thank you if you’ve read this far, okay I will stop boring you now byeee!!
#spideypool#spideypool rp#spideypool roleplay#spiderpool rp#spiderman x deadpool#peter parker x wade wilson#spiderman rp#spiderman roleplay#deadpool rp#wade wilson x peter parker
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Happy anniversary to this tweet. I didn't think of the trajectory my life would take just from this single decision at 1 fuckin am on a random Wednesday. But I eagerly waited to make this post since last year for many reasons. Because recounting how I came to love Pros and why this blog exists is always fun for me. Because indeed, why not?
Around July 25 of 2020 was when I watched the TGD arc for the first time. I'd already seen Pros before then (in a meme and a fancam LOL) but I was so glad I didn't get spoiled for this arc, I LOVE this arc. I originally thought I'd have a hard time enjoying part 5 (ironic) because at the time my main fav character from all of Jojo was 4taro. So I knew I'd watch part 5 slowly and I did, do that throughout the rest of August. Bruno and Mista (two other characters who I seem to have stopped talking about) were my favs back then too and I had a little list in my carrd with all three of the above mentioned. Somehow after the TGD arc (at the time I rationalized it as me thinking he's pretty) Pros made it to the end of the list. I thought hey LS are a random group of white men I should pick out a fav, this is my token white man!
I really didn't want to admit I liked him like that. Especially when he was introduced I thought 'oh he's one of THOSE dudes' I could feel the scene of him hitting Pesci coming and I was like yeah he's lucky he looks kind of ok compared to the rest of them. But then the scene of Pros consoling Pesci arrived which really threw me off a loop and changed my opinion of his character entirely. Suddenly there was a hidden depth to him I didn't expect. Either way, I enjoyed it and I thought that was it. I spent a lot of August looking at 4taro art and getting spoiled about Stone Ocean while reading SBR lmao. Around September, lots of my mutuals were reading reader insert fanfics. I wasn't in jojo tumblr back then and I didn't read reader inserts nor did I enjoy them as a form of fic. But inspired by the rest I decided to go down my fav character list. 4taro fics were nice but I couldn't see myself with someone like Jotaro. Bruno fics were nice but forgettable somehow and Mista fics were fun and cute but diddn't make me feel much.
That's when the tweet happened. I didn't want to read Pros fics per se, it was a run off the mill decision, I didn't even consider him seriously my fav, just some character who I liked to see art of on the TL because he was the prettiest to me out of La Squadra. I even ignored the silly brainworms that came before I even read fics for him. I was expecting to find some hardcore NSFW fics because he's villain. I thought I'd get a good laugh and move on! Especially because I didn't even like NSFW fics they felt so awkward to me. But when I searched "prosciutto x reader" on AO3 the first fic that showed up literally had "domesticity" in the title and "wifey status" in the description. It was this fic that I read. The writer is no longer active, they were already inactive when I was reading it. My domesticity loving ass was like "lol sure I'll be 'Prosciutto's wife' lmao" as if it was all fun and games. I mean, it was before I read the fic. Because after I read it... the brainworms were instantaneous.
What the fuck!!!! I enjoyed it so much... I already thought he was so cool. I tried to convince myself that he's ugly in places of the anime so I would like him like that, but it wasn't working. I loved his interpretation SO MUCH... He was so sweet, gentle, and charming. I was like damn maybe I DO wanna be Prosciutto's wife real badly... who's shit at baking but tries to be domestic anyway. He was so tender I just... words are all I have, but when I try to speak about him got none. He makes me stupid FOR REAL. I couldn't stop thinking about that fic, his smile, his gentle presence just... anything! Suddenly I was straight up constructing a reality where I get to take him back Canada and meet my family because yeah... we're married that's what married people do. But I knew I was fucking gone when I was trying to take a shower and I got so distracted thinking of him next to me, him being with me, I accidentally used body wash as shampoo. I told you he makes me stupid.
That little favorite character list got an update REAL fast and I was consuming Prosciutto content at the speed of light. Every single hc, fic, drabble, whatever I read made me love him that much more. He's so perfect. I really really REALLY wish I had the words to describe it other than 'he's perfect' but again, I run out of words! Maybe I don't know enough words to describe what I'm trying to say, maybe these words simply don't exist or the feeling transcends words entirely, I don't know. I didn't know what selfshipping or an f/o was either back then. But I constantly came back to tumblr to read Pros content and imagine myself with him. I only knew of jojo tumblr because the writer of that fic linked back to their blog in ao3 and I'd made a request of another fluffy pros fic (it never happened which is understandable). Even though I had a lot of fun reading about him, it was incredibly lonely. I didn't have friends with f/os they couldn't understand the depth of my feelings. I was afraid of being made fun of and so I couldn't admit that I liked him more than just a fav or comfort character on top of being incredibly insecure about my selfship. I'd never been sadder in my life than back then when the thought of sharing Pros made me cry multiple times, I felt stupid. I'll be honest, I still struggle with that now sometimes but I'm much better about it. I just don't talk about it but if there's people out there who are uncomfortable sharing f/os I send you all the strength <3
But since I was reading about Pros so much from cruising his ao3 / tumblr tags multiple times a day to obsessively reading and re reading and scrolling the same blogs over and over, google even suggested Prosciutto (the meat) before I typed anything into the search bar. I thought enough was enough and made this blog to save all the content I wanted to see and to track new Pros content that might come up. And I'm so happy I did!!!! I didn't think I'd meet so many wonderful people because of him! I remember being sad because I thought people would think my selfship is silly or I'm a bad fit for Pros or something but knowing there's so many good friends I've made who are all so supportive makes me so so so happy!!! I'm glad I read that fic, I wouldn't be here otherwise. I wondered where I'd be a year later. I was afraid I'd spend too much money on Pros and then not even enjoy him less than a year later. But I'm so happy to be in love with him still, to enjoy him still, and to not enjoy him alone. A lot of friends have told me they like my brainworms (thank you friends <3) and the same me was absolutely silent back then about him. I'm glad I don't hold in my thoughts for him anymore and just spill them out whenever. I used to think self-inserts were silly and now I have Focaccia who I'm so proud of. That little fic changed my life so incredibly, I can't recount every detail. And this is just one year, I can't wait for more years!!! I was relieved to think I'm free to love Pros as long as I want. So I'll be like 99 and showing my grandkids a black and white picture of him saying "that's your grandfather before the war" if I so wish.
Happy anniversary, Prosciutto 💜.
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m. osamu | good enough
》 miya osamu x fem!reader
↠ warnings: smut, oral (male receiving), soft sex, mentions of insecurity, slight blood warning
↠ word count: 6,519
↠ a/n: Putting some of my works from Ao3 onto Tumblr so if you see this on Archive don’t be alarmed lmao. This is one of my personal favorite things I’ve written so I really hope it gets some attention :)
“They’d make such a perfect couple.”
“They’re both in love with volleyball and athletics, how could they not be in love?”
“He’d be perfect for her.”
“They’re like a match made in heaven.”
Osamu almost agreed to every word the people around him spoke. He listened with a forced smile as they babbled on about how perfect of a couple they’d make. He wasn’t really a part of the conversation, but they spoke so loudly that he could hear every word.
He wished he could suddenly go deaf the more and more they babbled on.
“What about the other one?”
“You mean his twin? Oh, no, that’d never work out.”
“Why not?”
“Well. . . he just opened that restaurant and that’s just not the type of guy that would be good for her.”
Osamu clenched his fists. They must not know he’s here, or at least that he’s able to hear them. Their families had always gossiped, even when they were three young children barely able to walk.
Why wasn’t he good enough for you? What made him any worse than Atsumu?
He didn’t really want an answer, but he still got one.
“You know. . . she needs to stay fit for volleyball. Besides, it’ll look better for her career if she’s with another volleyball player.”
“Osamu is pretty fit. He used to play volleyball.”
“I know but he’s just. . . well, with that new restaurant opened it’s only a matter of time before he’ll start gaining weight. Don’t you know how much that boy eats? He can’t keep all that weight away now that he’s out of volleyball.”
“I guess that’s true. . .”
Their words played on repeat in his head over and over every time he found himself in the gym, lifting weights. He panted, arms trembling a bit as he worked on bench presses. He was determined, and he refused to let himself gain the weight they said he would.
Atsumu stared down at his counterpart, one brow raised. He was spotting for him, but Osamu looked angry and he was paranoid it was his fault.
“What’s with that look, ‘Samu?” he asked.
“Nothin’. I don’t have a look,” snapped Osamu.
He knew it wasn’t fair to take it out on his brother. Atsumu never made any moves on you, not anything beyond the realm of being best friends. Atsumu was an idiot, sure, but he knew when his brother was in love with someone. He never mentioned it to Osamu, but they both knew. You were off limits to ‘Tsumu, and neither of them were sure if ‘Samu was ever going to gather the courage to make a move on the girl he’d loved since childhood.
Osamu’s biceps flexed as he pushed the weight up again. Atsumu was quick to recognize the signs of exhaustion. Osamu had been at it for a while, pushing himself more than he usually did.
Atsumu grabbed the weight from him and set it on the holder. Osamu’s grey eyes snapped up to him.
“What the hell, ‘Tsumu?!” he sat up and glared at his twin.
“One more press and you’d have dropped it on yer head,” Atsumu scoffed, “what the hell is yer problem?”
Osamu clenched his fists. He got up and grabbed his towel and water bottle. To his annoyance, his brother followed him. He completely disregarded his question and wiped some of the sweat from his face. He took a glance down at his stomach, then flexed a little to check his arms.
“Someone call ya fat or somethin’?” Atsumu questioned.
“Shut up,” Osamu grumbled, “I’m not fat.”
Atsumu didn’t like how quickly his brother defended himself. He crossed his arms over his chest, watching Osamu move to another machine. He trailed after his twin and continued pushing.
“Seriously, tell me what yer problem is—”
“You’re my problem, Atsumu!” Osamu snapped.
Instantly, Atsumu stopped pressing it. They hardly ever called each other by their actual names unless it was something serious. Clearly, his brother was really, genuinely upset.
“Me? What the hell did I do?”
“Yer just so friggin’ perfect! Mister fuckin’ perfect over here can get any girl he wants! What the hell to you got that I don’t?! We look exactly the same! I exercise! I ain’t fat and I don’t overeat jus’ cause I opened my own goddamn restaurant! Why the hell am I the ‘other twin’?! Why is it Atsumu an’ the other one? Why ain’t it just Atsumu and Osamu?! What the hell do I got that makes me inferior to ya?!”
Osamu panted as he finished his rant, grey eyes glaring daggers into his shocked blond counterpart. Atsumu didn’t know what to say. Had people really been convincing his brother that he wasn’t good enough? That Atsumu was the better twin?
Atsumu made plenty of jokes about being better, but he never actually believed them. To him, Osamu was the better of the two. Osamu knew it too. He knew that if Atsumu had actually heard what people said, then he’d be the first one to stand up for him. Atsumu would beat the hell outta someone talking shit about his twin brother, and Osamu knew it.
And he still snapped it him. . .
“Who told ya all that shit?” Atsumu muttered.
“Doesn’t fuckin’ matter,” Osamu got up, shoving past his brother and heading to the locker room. He could barely stand the sight of Atsumu.
“You know that shit isn’t true!” Atsumu grabbed the back of Osamu’s black t-shirt.
Osamu instantly recoiled. He shoved Atsumu off him with as much strength as he could muster up, which, frankly, was a lot. He glared at his twin and adjusted his shirt. Atsumu glared back with the same amount of anger and his fists clenched.
“Guys? What happened?”
Both boys whirled around to face you. You stood not far from them, dressed in shorts and a tank top. Osamu couldn’t help but stare. No matter how many times he saw you, even after all these years, you were still so beautiful to him.
“’Samu’s being a fuckin’ prick is what happened,” Atsumu scoffed. “Said somethin’ about—”
Osamu has never punched his brother so hard in his life. It was an impulse move, a bad one. It wasn’t even the type of thing Atsumu would do, which made the dark-haired twin feel absolutely ashamed.
He flicked his wrist, heaving as he stared at Atsumu who was on the ground covering his face. You were kneeled beside him, panicking. Other people in the gym noticed the commotion and came running over. Osamu clenched his fists, then stormed to the locker room without glancing back.
He felt like the scum of the earth.
He’d never changed so fast in his life. He didn’t even bother to shower. Osamu just grabbed his things and left. He fumbled with his keys, grumbling under his breath. He unlocked the door and pulled it open.
Only for a hand to slam it closed.
Osamu looked at you, who stood beside him looking furious. He gulped a little.
“(Y/n)—”
“What the hell was that, Osamu!?”
Uh oh. No nickname. He really was in trouble, and he deserved it, he knows he does. You didn’t wait for an answer before you were continuing. He just watched you pace.
“You almost broke ‘Tsumu’s nose! What the hell was your fight about that you punched him out of the blue like that and in public! You and him have an image to uphold, ‘Samu! Not only that, but you’ve been acting so weird lately! It’s like you’re distancing yourself! You’re always at the gym working out, you barely eat anymore, and now you’re beating Atsumu up in the middle of a gym! And I don’t want any excuses! I want the truth, Osamu! Did something happen when we went back to Hyogo last week to see our families? Don’t lie to me!”
You were breathless when you finished talking, and staring up at his face with narrowed eyes.
You knew the Miya twins better than anyone. You’d been with them since the three of you were kids. You were their next door neighbor, and when your mother and theirs had become friends, so did you and the two boys.
You were by their side through it all. From the day they fell in love with volleyball (thus dragging you into it), to when you three attended Inarizaki, up to now with you and Atsumu being pro volleyball players and Osamu owning his own restaurant.
You were so proud of them both, and it was obvious that Osamu wasn’t proud of himself.
Now that you called him out on all his bullshit, Osamu was completely embarrassed. Luckily for him, he was really good at hiding his embarrassment. Still, he felt stupid. He didn’t think you’d notice. You were busy with volleyball, just like Atsumu, so he never expected you to see that part of him.
“You noticed all that?” he asked, gulping.
“Of course I did, you idiot!” you smacked him on the side of the head.
Osamu rubbed the side of his head, sighing. He leaned back against his car and crossed his arms over his chest. You stared at him, waiting for an answer. He had to hold himself back from laughing, both at himself and you.
You were probably the only person who had the guts to yell at him and his brother. It’s not like girls commonly yelled at two 6’3 and very muscular guys.
“I just. . .” Osamu sighed. “Well. . . yer mom said some things.”
“My mom? What the hell did she say?”
Osamu felt stupider with every word he said. He was walking a fine line. He was on a tightrope of whether or not to confess his long-time feelings for you. It would be easier to lie and say your mom thought volleyball was better than the food business. Besides, you’d see right through it. He’s not a good liar, he knows it, and he especially can’t lie to you when all you’d asked for was his honesty.
Osamu averted his eyes. He rubbed the back of his neck.
“Well, uh, she said I wasn’t good enough for ya. She said you and ‘Tsumu would be better because ya both play volleyball,” he confessed.
It pissed him off just to say it out loud. It made that insecurity bubble up again in his chest.
“’Tsumu and I would be. . . better? For what?”
Osamu sometimes hated how clueless you could be.
“She’s been wantin’ you and him to get together fer a long time, (Y/n),” he sighed, “she doesn’t want a guy like me steppin’ between you and my brother getting in a relationship.”
Before he knew it, he was babbling.
“Can’t even blame her. Who’d want to date a guy like me? Yer a volleyball player, yer athletic, ya need to stay healthy. I’m not even playin’ sports anymore. All I do is cook food and stuff my mouth full. I just. . . I didn’t wanna get fat like she said. I didn’t wanna embarrass ya just in case I—”
He stopped and shut his mouth. You stepped forward, placing your hand on his arm.
“. . . in case you what, ‘Samu?”
Osamu turned to look at you. You were close to him now, looking like the prettiest damn thing he’s ever laid eyes on. You have always been so pretty to him and he’s so in love with every aspect of you that it hurts.
He mustered up his courage and swallowed the lump of nervousness that’d built up in his throat. He reached up to cup your cheek.
“In case I ever got the courage to tell ya I’m in love with ya. . .” he muttered.
Osamu loved the way your breath hitched. He wanted to kiss you, he wanted to pull you against his body and taste you. He wanted to do all the things he’d been afraid of doing, the things he was still afraid of doing.
“’Samu, I-“
“HEY DIPSHIT!”
Osamu lurched his whole body away from yours. He looked up to see his twin brother running at him. He choked on air, turning to dodge but ‘Tsumu was faster. His foot collided with the back of his head and sent Osamu down to the ground. He groaned loudly, gripping his head.
“Fuuuck.”
“That’s fer bein’ a fuckin’ asshole and almost breaking my nose!” Atsumu kicked him in the rib, and for once, Osamu took it because he knew he deserved it. “Next time I’ll break YOUR nose, ya fat prick!”
“I am not fat!” Osamu snapped, glaring at Atsumu.
No kidding about his nose. It was bruised and he had two bloody wads of paper stuffed up in his nostrils. His eyes were red and he was obviously in pain. Osamu felt extremely guilty. Atsumu gave him another solid kick to the ribs, before stubbornly holding out his hand for his twin. He hesitantly accepted and let the blond pull him to his feet.
You watched them, tiredly rubbing your temple. It’s hard to believe that these two are actual adults.
“Are you two done making each other ugly?” you asked, rubbing your temple.
Atsumu scoffed. He threw an arm around your neck and ruffled your hair. You whined, punching his stomach to force him to let go.
“Knock it off, ‘Tsumu!”
“Not until a admit we’re not ugly.”
“Never!”
“Admit it, brat!”
Osamu ran a hand through his tangled, dark hair. He watched you and Atsumu, jealousy tugging at him to the core. Like he always did, he put on a fake smile and leaned on his car.
“I should go,” he said.
You and Atsumu turned to him.
“Wait, ‘Samu—”
“Don’t worry ‘bout it. I’ll see ya later, (Y/n). And uh. . . ‘Tsumu,” he rubbed the back of his neck, “I’m sorry.”
Osamu didn’t wait for an answer before he got into his car and left. You and Atsumu watched him go. The blond released you with a long, annoyed sigh. He ran a hand through his hair.
“What’a scrub. I can’t believe he thinks he’s not good enough. . .” he muttered.
You looked down at your feet, fists clenched at your sides. Osamu looked sad, distant. He looked like he wasn’t content with his life and now you knew why. He felt like he was inferior to his twin. You felt like you should have recognized it, but you always loved him for just being. . . Osamu. You didn’t compare him to Atsumu, not ever. To you they were separate. They weren’t just the twins. They were Atsumu and Osamu, separate. Because of your own view on them, you didn’t even recognize Osamu’s insecurity.
You wondered how long it’d been there.
“Atsumu. . . he. . . Osamu said he loves me,” you muttered to your best friend, “and I love him back but he doesn’t think he’s good enough for me.”
“Wait, he finally told ya?”
You looked up at him. “W-What do you mean ‘finally’? How long has he felt like that?”
Like a vice, Atsumu zipped his trap. He raised his hand in mock surrender and turned away to make his way back to the gym. You went after him. You grabbed the back of his t-shirt and tugged.
“’Tsumu, tell me!”
“Just go ask ‘im yerself!” he protested, dragging you along as he continued walking.
“What if he won’t answer me!?”
Atsumu stopped. He turned around and looked you dead in the eyes.
“He will. He won’t lie to you.”
Osamu sighed as he entered his apartment. It was down the block from his restaurant and honestly, he was wishing he went there instead. It felt more like home sometimes. He tossed his keys lazily on the coffee table, then kicked off his shoes and made his way to the bathroom for a shower.
He couldn’t believe he actually told you he loved you then left you there with the guy who’d been his competition for his whole life. What if you liked ‘Tsumu? What if you were like your mom and you thought the same way?
He grumbled, standing beneath the hot water of the shower as his thoughts ran rampant. He felt like a lovesick idiot. He was a grown ass adult and here he was acting like a lovesick teenager.
Osamu got out of the shower and got dressed. He didn’t even bother to dry his hair. He just glanced at it in the mirror, remembering back to a time when he used to dye it grey. Now it’d grown out to it’s natural dark brown color.
With a sigh, he headed to the kitchen to get started on his dinner. He’d barely pulled out the ingredients before he heard loud knocking at the door.
“I swear, if it’s Tsumu. . .” he grumbled, wiping his hands on his pants, before going to answer.
He was not expecting to see you standing on the other side of the door when he opened it. You jumped forward, practically leaping onto him and wrapping your arms around his neck. He quickly caught you in his arms, stumbling back a little.
“W-What the hell are ya doin’ here?” he sputtered.
You clung onto him like a koala, legs wrapping around his waist while your hands clung onto the back of his Onigiri Miya t-shirt. He kicked the door shut and brought you to his couch. You didn’t let go of him until he sat down with you planted right on his lap.
Your arms released him in favor of cupping both his chubby, red cheeks. He stared at you with confused grey eyes.
“How long?” you asked.
His face went blank. “Huh?”
“How long have you been in love with me? ‘Tsumu said you ‘finally confessed’ like you’ve known for a while.” you explained.
Osamu decided that the next time he saw his twin, he really was going to break his nose. That damn bastard can never keep his mouth shut. . . He cleared his throat and awkwardly averted his gaze.
“Ya seriously came all the way to my place to ask me how long I’ve been in love with ya?”
“Well. . . yes. . .”
He sighed and chuckled a little. “Wow.”
“Shut up and tell me.”
Osamu knew there was no getting out of this one. He laid his arms over the back of the couch and looked at you. You looked. . . hopeful? Excited? He wasn’t even sure what emotion could be used to describe the expression on your face.
“Probably since middle school,” he confessed.
He sounded a lot more relaxed than he really felt. Finally saying it out loud made his heart hammer in his ears, but it also lifted a weight off his shoulders that he didn’t even realize was there. He didn’t realize the impact of hiding his feelings for all these years and regretted not saying something sooner.
“M-Middle school?” your eyes were wide. “’Samu, why didn’t you—”
“Say something?” he sighed. “Because you and ‘Tsumu would have made a better couple.”
Your eyes widened even more. Osamu ran a hand through his hair.
“Ya guys both love volleyball way more than me. Plus yer both just. . . well, fuckin’ perfect. I never fit in that equation so I kept my trap shut.”
Osamu winced when your hands slapped both of his cheeks. He grabbed your wrists lightly.
“Hey, would ya quit slappin’ me?”
“No, because you’re an idiot!” you snapped.
“. . . huh. . .?”
“You’re perfect, Osamu! You’re amazing and you’re perfect to me!” you stared him dead in the eyes as you ranted. “You’re not inferior to Atsumu. Just because you didn’t stick with volleyball doesn’t make you less than us! You love making food, you love it! We would never blame you for doing what you love to do!”
Osamu was stunned, watching tears pool in your eyes as you continued. Your arms went slack in his hands where he was holding your wrists. You hunched forward, laying your head on his chest.
“I’m in love with you too, ‘Samu. You’re amazing in every way and you’re so handsome. . . I love you—I’ve loved you for years. . .”
You fell a silent, letting your words hang in the air for him to process. He could barely breathe. His heart was hammering and he felt like he was floating. You. . . love him? You’ve been in love with him for years?
Osamu let go of your wrists and grabbed your jaw, making you look at him. He was acting entirely on impulse as he leaned forward and pressed his lips to yours. You were stunned for a moment, before returning the kiss. His lips were warm and made your head spin as they moved against yours with a passion.
One arm wrapped around his neck to bring him closer against you. He caught your other hand with his and entwined your fingers. His hand was big in yours and you were reminded how much bigger and stronger Osamu was, and yet he still managed to be the softest person you knew.
His tongue swept across your bottom lip, begging for entrance. He wanted to taste all of you. He didn’t want this to end.
You parted your lips. His hand squeezed yours as your tongues danced in a fight for dominance. Naturally, he won, and took his prize by pulling you closer against him. You could feel his growing bulge press against your crotch. A small moan left your lips. You grinded against him, throwing your head back and exposing your neck to his hungry eyes. Instantly, he was on you, lips attacking the soft skin of your neck. He was soft with each kiss he placed on your flesh. He didn’t leave any marks, no matter how much he wanted to.
“S-Samu,” you moaned, tangling your fingers in his dark hair and tugging lightly.
He’d be lying if he said he never imagined hearing you moan his name. Hearing it now sent his heart soaring.
Osamu grabbed you, holding you under your thighs as he stood up and began making his way to his bedroom. You clung to his broad shoulders, peppering kisses along his neck as he walked.
He laid you back on his bed. You reached to him to pull him back to you. He slipped off his shirt, before joining you in bed. You let your hands trail down his chest and stomach. He was muscular, built from years of volleyball and now from constant exercise. You loved the way he looked, but you felt bad that he’d been pushing himself so far just because he was worried he wasn’t good enough for you. . .
The pads of your fingers brushed over the dark patch of hair that trailed into his pants. Your cheeks instantly flushed and you pulled your hand back like he’d burned you.
Osamu just chuckled a little. He crawled over you, pressing his lips against yours and holding his weight up on his arms. You held his cheeks, savoring the taste of him while he all but stole the air from your lungs.
His lips parted from yours and began peppering kisses down your neck. You tangled your fingers in his dark hair. It’s so soft compared to the dyed version back in high school. He left soft kisses over your clothes chest all the way down to your waist where his hands slipped beneath the fabric of your shirt. You lifted your back off the bed as he began slipping it off your body.
It’s funny. . . you can’t remember the last time you were embarrassed in front of Osamu. But now, with him staring down at your body, you could feel embarrassment seeping in. It’s hard to believe someone as attractive as him, best friend or not, would ever be in love with you. He didn’t even know how amazing he was.
“Fuck. . .” he muttered, running his hands over your sides. “Yer so damn pretty.”
You sat up, pressing your lips to his. You didn’t let the embarrassment set in, and before you knew it, you were pulling off your bra. Osamu watched your breasts spill from the undergarment, his eyes shining.
He felt like a virgin all over again when his hands snapped up to cup them. You were on another level, so perfect and pretty and all for him. A possessive side he didn’t know he had kicked in and he imagined being the last man on earth to see this. He wanted to be with you forever.
Osamu groaned when he felt your hand brush over his bulge. He was grateful when you unzipped his pants. He helped you shimmy them off his long legs, kicking them aside somewhere with the rest of your clothing. He wasn’t satisfied. He wanted you naked. He wanted to see all of you. He wanted it all and for once he was content with being greedy like his brother.
His hands fervently tugged the shorts off your legs and threw them aside with more strength than he intended. He ran his hands along your soft legs, admiring them. He had plenty of chances to admire them when you were in shorts on the court, and he couldn’t help but get a little possessive.
“Osamu,” you murmured, snapping him from his daze.
You held his jaw and turned his head toward you. It felt like a dream when your lips were against his again. He savored the way your hands ran over his chest. You pushed him down on his back and shifted yourself so you were straddling him.
His big hands naturally found themselves on your hips. He gulped, watching you pepper kisses down his chest and abs. You looked anxious as your fingers delicately hooked on the waistband of his boxers. He lifted his hips off the bed as you tugged them off his legs. He squeezed your lips and let out a small sigh of relief, no longer feeling constricted.
Still, he was embarrassed to have you seeing him so exposed.
You cautiously wrapped your hand around the base of his cock. His fingers dug into your skin as you pumped his length. He couldn’t help but smirk a little because he could tell you were nervous. At least he wasn’t self-conscious about that department.
“(Y/n),” he spoke. “Don’t feel pressured.”
You could practically melt at the sound of his voice in that moment. It was deepy, raspy. It was beautiful, just like everything about him. You wanted to do this. You wanted to prove that he was good enough for you. Too good for you, even.
Instead of answering, you leaned down. You peppered soft kisses along his shaft. His breath hitched. He watched your lips wrap around his tip. You bobbed your head slowly, savoring the taste and weight of him in your mouth. Osamu groaned with each pump, throwing his head back into the pillows. Even so, he couldn’t tear his eyes away. You were so goddamn pretty. So fucking perfect and he was on top of the world.
And, for the first time in almost his whole life, he felt worthy.
You were so soft. Everything about you was soft. Your lips, your words, your skin, your mind. He wanted to take it all for himself and never share it with anyone. He wanted to be the last guy in your life because he wanted you with him forever.
He sucked in a breath as he watched you go down on him. Just watching you made it difficult for him to hold himself back. He would come too soon if you kept on, and that was the last thing he wanted.
Osamu sat up, wrapping an arm around you and tugging you off him. You looked at him with flushed cheeks. He swiped his thumb over your bottom lip, brushing away the saliva. You were breathtaking, even now, and Osamu Miya was so entirely in love.
He pushed you back on the bed, resisting the urge to kiss you so he could pull off your last article of clothing. Even such a small piece made all the difference to him. He couldn’t believe this was you. This was the same girl he’d known since his childhood. The same one who used to bathe with him and Atsumu when they were almost too young to remember.
“Fuck,” he breathed, “yer the prettiest goddamn thing.”
Warmth swelled in your chest. You couldn’t resist reaching up to wrap your arms around him. Your lips were against his in a haste, moving and tongues entwining. His hands roamed the expanse of your thighs, pushing them apart enough for his hips to fit between them.
He brushed his hand over your folds, swiping a finger through them to gather up your fluid. You moaned into his open mouth, and he drank it in like you were the last drop of water in a desert. The sounds you made were equally as pretty as you are. He slipped a finger into you, pumping slowly. Your back arched off the bed from the minor stretch. You threw your head back and bit your swollen bottom lip.
“’Samu,” you moaned.
Fuck, if he wasn’t in love with the sound of his name on your lips.
“Say my name,” he mumbled, leaning down to press kisses into your jawline, “say it.”
He needed to hear it. He wanted to hear it. If he had a choice, he’d want you to be the only person who ever got to say his name from this moment forward.
“Osamu, please,” you begged. “I need you.”
He pulled his hand away. You breathed heavily, chest heaving as his hips fit easily between your open thighs. He fit perfectly, like a puzzle piece you always needed. He lined the tip of his cock with your soaked entrance, gathering up your essence, before beginning to press in.
You back arched off the bed as he stretched you. He groaned deeply, lips crashing onto yours while his hands shot down to hold onto yours. He pressed them into the mattress at either side of your head, fingers entwining with yours and you’ve never felt so safe. Osamu was the definition of safe, you had no doubt.
You kissed him sloppily as his hips finally pressed against yours and he was fully inside you. He was warm, big. He felt so perfect. To him, you were perfect. You took him so well and he could feel the way his chest swelled with pride.
“Osamu, more,” you begged, squeezing his hands.
He pulled his hips back, before bringing them back to yours. Every thrust was slow, but hard. He loved the way you sang his name. Normally, he was quiet during sex but for you he supposed he could sing a little. It was hard not to.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he groaned, “yer so fucking perfect. I’m so in love with ya. I want more, I want all of ya.”
“Y-Yours, ‘Samu! I’m yours!” you cried for him, clinging onto his every move.
He wanted to kiss you so bad but he wanted to hear your sounds more. He wanted to keep admiring the beautiful faces you made for him as you moaned his name and let him fuck you like a man driven wild by love.
“Yer my pretty girl—fuck—I’m so fuckin’ lucky. How’d I get so goddamn lucky?” he panted.
One of his hands released yours and moved to hold your jaw. The temptation became too much. His lips were pressed into yours while his hips snapped into yours. He kept the same pace, wanting to drag this moment out for as long as possible because part of him was terrified it would never happen again. Part of him still wasn’t sure if this was a dream or reality.
He’d savor it no matter what.
Osamu groaned at the feeling of your nails scraping down his back. His hips snapped forward harshly, resulting in a squeak from you that he quickly swallowed as he pulled you into another kiss. His other hand released yours to move down between your legs and rub your clit. You were screaming for him, begging for more and he wasn’t the type of man to ignore what you want.
He picked up his pace, breathing heavily. You were close, he could feel it with the way your walls squeezed around his cock. He was close too.
“Shit, shit, shit!” he panted.
“Fuck! ‘Samu, I’m so close!” your fingers tangled in his hair, tugging rather harshly that resulted in another harsh snap of his hips.
“Come on, fucking let go for me, baby girl,” he groaned.
Your whole body trembled when he brought you over the edge. He hissed a little, continuing to snap his hips at a faster pace than before. He was chasing his own high as you screamed in euphoria for Osamu.
The arms holding up his weight flexed and wobbled as he finally reached his high. Your legs were tight around his hips, not letting him slip out as he came. He breathed heavily, giving slow thrusts as he came down. You whimpered a little with oversensitivity. He stopped, now just staring down at your face.
You and him just stared at one another, breathing heavily. A droplet of sweat slid down the bridge of his nose and dropped down onto your collarbone. You reached up, arms wobbly, and pushed his dark hair from his face. You could feel his own arms wobbling as he struggled to hold up his weight. He was exhausted, both from the gym and from this.
“It’s okay, ‘Samu,” you murmured.
He let out a long breath, before falling on top of you. You giggled a little despite his weight crushing you a bit. He rolled over before he could suffocate you. You rolled over, resting your head on his bicep as his fingers played with your hair. You ran your hands over his chest, still breathless but this time it was because of how totally in love with Osamu Miya you are.
“I love you,” he spoke first.
You smiled, looking at his face. “I love you too.”
A soft silence settled in the room. You shut your eyes, cuddling up against Osamu’s side. No official question was asked, even though it was itching at the tip of his tongue, but you both knew who you belonged to. He took pride in being yours, but had even more pride in the fact that you were his.
“Are ya hungry?” he blurted suddenly, feeling a weird need to make sure you were fed and hydrated.
You yawned a little. “Yeah, I’m pretty hungry and your cooking is always the best, Samu.”
He chuckled a little. He reluctantly dragged himself out of bed and made his way to the bathroom. He came back with a washcloth and got you and himself cleaned up. He lazily tossed it aside into the far corner of his room. You grumbled and got out of his bed. With wobbly legs, you slipped on your panties along with the Onigiri Miya shirt he’d been wearing earlier. He threw on some sweats and a different t-shirt.
Once dressed, the two of you walked to the kitchen hand-in-hand.
“Hey. Have fun?”
You and Osamu froze in the doorway, staring at the obnoxious blond twink who was sitting on Osamu’s counter eating his cereal straight from the box. Atsumu’s eyes narrowed. He had bandages over his nose now and honestly looked like a whole mess. His blond hair stuck up in every direction and he didn’t even bother to change out of his bloodied t-shirt from earlier.
Osamu’s brow twitched. Embarrassment and anger flowed through him. He wanted nothing more than to punch Atsumu’s lights out but he’d already done that earlier so he decided against it—
“I expected to come over and find ya guys wholesomely cooking food together,” Atsumu huffed. “Naturally, I had to come steal some but instead I hear ya dipshits goin’ at it like rabbits and now I have’ta eat ceral for dinner.”
“WHY DON’T YOU EAT YER OWN DAMN FOOD, ‘TSUMU!?” Osamu threw the nearest object at his brother, which happened to be a magnet from the fridge.
“Because ya owe me for breakin’ my fucking nose!”
“Can I not have some fuckin’ privacy!?” Osamu hissed.
You sighed, rubbing your temple tiredly. You walked to Osamu’s fridge and dug through for something simple to make some food while the twins continued arguing. Eventually Osamu got Atsumu out of the kitchen by bribing him with a clean, non-bloodied shirt. Now a shirtless Osamu was making you and him sandwiches.
You leaned your front against his broad back, wrapping your arms around his middle and watching him make the sandwiches.
Atsumu peeked his head around the doorway, eyes narrowing a little.
“Ya dumbasses are finally official, right?” he asked.
Osamu’s brow twitched. You grabbed his hand to keep him from throwing the butter knife at his brother.
“Yeah, we are,” you answered.
“Fuckin’ about time. I was getting real sick of watchin’ ya fawn over each other for years,” he waved his hand then left the apartment.
You and Osamu stood there in silent embarrassment for a few minutes. Atsumu’s words sank in.
“This whole time. . .” you trailed off.
“He knew it the whole time and didn’t say a word. . .” Osamu let out a long sigh. “I hate him.”
You laughed. You and Osamu sat at the dining table. He tugged you onto his lap while the two of you happily enjoyed your sandwiches. He was content, more content than he’d ever been in his whole life. He kept an arm wrapped loosely around your waist just to keep himself grounded because this wasn’t a dream.
This wasn’t a dream. You were here. You were with him, his girlfriend, and you were just as in love with him as he was with you. He was good enough all along and he felt stupid for never seeing it.
. . .
“What will yer mom say when she finds out?” he asked.
“She can suck my dick,” you huffed, “I love you and that won’t change.”
“Hm. . . Well, ya know, my mom will be happy that yer finally dating one of us. She’s been begging us to marry ya since middle school.”
“Seriously?” you turned to him with a stunned expression. “What did you say?”
Even more surprising was the fact that Osamu was grinning. He propped his elbow up on the table and rested his chin in his open palm. He stared at you with all the love in the world.
“I told ‘er I was gonna be the one to marry ya.”
#miya osamu#miya osamu headcanon#miya osamu imagine#miya osamu drabble#osamu miya#atsumu miya#miya atsumu#miya twins#headcanon#imagine#drabble#fanfiction#osamu miya fanfic#romance#fluff#osamu fluff#osamu#miya#haikyu x reader#haikyuu headcanons#haikyuu!!#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu#haikyuu drabble#haikyuu imagine#timeskip osamu#timeskip#smut#haikyuu smut#fluffy smut
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ok. uh first of all the mcyt fandom is very very inherently queer. while not every fan is queer obviously, the tumblr community is built on respect and acceptance. second: you are NOT bi or pan. you are NOT allowed to comment on the validity of either identity. it’s literally not that hard. bi = attraction to more than one gender/two or more genders, pan = attraction regardless of gender. that’s it. now shut up and stop getting involved in discourse that doesn’t concern you at all <3
you realize i am anti-pan strictly because i listen to bi voices and what bi people have said to me in addition to common sense, right? cause social media everywhere seems to have this collective agreement that we need to uplift voices of minorities we are not apart of when they speak about the issues they face, and then when we do y'all get mad cause we're "inserting ourselves where we don't belong" when that's literally a whole different malicious shitty thing to do.
also i've always found the "you can't speak on this at all ever under any circumstance unless it 100% agrees with us because you are not ___" to be completely bullshit (not even to mention the complete bias in that anyways). like yeah i can't speak over you on your issues or on a lot of things really but i can speak with you and i can make comments where it makes sense to.
if a cis person says neopronouns are stupid and harmful then they should be condemned because that's not their say and they don't use them. (if they can list WHY they are harmful then i'm willing to debate and debunk but i'm not gonna take them too seriously.) if a cis person (namely a lesbian but it doesn't really matter) says nonbinary people can be gay or lesbian then their opinion should not be prioritized BUT if their argument makes some fucking sense, and if it's something that we're working hard to get generally accepted by non-lesbians, then why should we condemn it? if a bi sapphic says lesbians can like men then they need to be shut down for their blatant lesbophobia. if a bi person supports the usage of the orange and pink lesbian flag because it's inclusive of many different lesbians But excludes mspec ones, that should be supported. OR, if a bi person does not like the orange and pink flag but has REASONS for it, they can state them and their opinion is valid BUT should not be prioritized and they should not have the final say. that's also something i'd argue with but i'm not gonna just block and dismiss them on the basis of being bi and "wrong", y'know?
so, my point is, i can speak on bi/pan discourse because i have logical reasoning and arguments for it and especially because i speak WITH bi people on this issue, but i understand that i am not on the front lines of the debate or the end-all-be-all. that doesn't mean i should just shut up and never speak up on how pannies affect bi people again, though.
not even to mention, even if you wanna disregard all of that, WE CAN STILL SPEAK ON PANSEXUALITY BECAUSE IT'S NOT JUST BIPHOBIC, BUT INVALIDATING OF EVERY OTHER SEXUALITY AS WELL. by implying that you guys are the only ones who can love regardless of gender or parts or biology or whatever, you are ALSO lesbophobic, homophobic, etc. so if you wanna dismiss me speaking up on your little fandom's biphobia then you can't shut me up when i speak on its lesbophobia. argue with that.
anyways going back to your mcyt point idek what to say that which i haven't already said in [this post]. whatever the rest of the fandom is or isn't or does or doesn't do has absolutely no control over what i am or say or do. i'm my own person and i have free will, y'know. same with tumblr as a platform, i'm not violating any of their guidelines, rules, tos, policies, etc. so you can't forcefully change my opinions or get my blog shut down unless i'm actually spewing hatred or maliciously harassing anybody on the basis of anything... which i'm not. so.
like................. damn anon, congrats on proving every goddamn battleaxe bi's point that y'all pannies can't fucking listen or comprehend for shit and after coming across a decent point you just......... say something useless that has already been addressed a thousand fuckin times and then call it a proud gatcha moment. how about YOU shut up ty <3
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Could you post an excerpt of your writing pretty please?
I’m going to do this under the cut so I’m not just filling up everyone’s dash, but thanks for asking! It’s cool y’all are interested. It took me a while to decide what part would be good to share. I thought about trying to pull an excerpt from each of the three POVs, but I think that would get too long to share in a text post on Tumblr.
This is part of the scene where the most characters are present at once. It’s told from Avery’s perspective. She’s basically the dyke of my dreams but also....not. I wrote a little more about her in response to this ask
Co-author is @arabdyke !
Also, if you’re wondering what the hell I’m talking about, follow the link above!
One thing I will say about this book is that we aren’t going for anything fancy, more going for attachment to the characters and readability (since it’s so fuckin long lol). It all takes place in first perspective, so we are just trying to achieve something that feels natural. Let me know what y’all think!
“I’m gonna go smoke,” I say when there’s finally a lull in the conversation.
“I’ll come,” Ian offers, which surprises me. I won’t turn down the company though.
Amanda heads off to some other part of the house while all three of us make our way outside. I take a cigarette out, lighting it. I try to exhale away from Ian, but the smoke keeps blowing in his face.
“Sorry,” I crack a smile.
He just smiles back wearily.
“Do you think Everest likes that Amanda girl?” I ask.
He sighs and shrugs, looking pathetic about it. “Probably. I don’t know. I mean, it’s fine if he does.”
“Is it?”
He slumps again. “I mean, yeah, it is.”
“Why isn’t it fine?” I ask, ignoring what he just said.
Ian looks around hesitantly like he’s making sure we’re far away from all other ears. He seems deeply uncomfortable. I seriously feel bad for this guy. He doesn’t know what I know, but even if I didn’t, I’d never be shitty about it. He probably even knows that, but it might not make it easier.
“It’s just hard to watch Everest date anyone now...after Gwen was so awful.”
“Mm,” I muse. “Well, Amanda seems nice.”
Rudolf’s staring at Ian intensely like he’s trying to will him into just spitting it out already.
“I guess,” Ian agrees slowly. “Nice enough.”
Rudolf kind of rolls his eyes, but doesn’t say anything. Ian just crosses his arms, staring off at nothing in particular.
“There are other reasons too,” he mumbles, still not making eye contact. “Like...I don’t know. I like him.”
Jesus. Finally.
“Aw, that’s sweet,” I tease, not wanting to act too shocked or knowing. “You guys have known each other forever. How long have you been into him?”
“A long time. Too long, probably. It’s stupid, right?”
“It’s not stupid,” Rudolf cuts in before I can come up with a response. “You can’t help the way you feel.”
Ian just shrugs.
“Rudolf’s right,” I say. “It’s not stupid.”
“It’s pretty hard not to feel that way,” Ian chuckles bitterly.
“Trust me, I get it…” I continue. “I was in love with my best friend too once upon a time, but it’s not the end of the world. He could feel the same way even. You have no idea.”
“Yeah,” Rudolf adds. “I mean, he did date a guy once, right? You kinda left that part out before, buddy.”
“We were kids,” Ian says, getting red. “That barely counts.”
“Of course it counts,” Rudolf insists.
“Well, he isn’t gay,” Ian says pointedly.
“He literally told me he was bi just a few days ago.”
Ian gets quiet and seems confused. He looks like he’s trying to figure out how that could be possible.
“He told you that?” he asks finally.
Rudolf nods.
“He never told me that,” Ian states. I can tell he doesn’t know what to make of this new information. Is it a good thing? Mostly he just looks dazed.
“He thought you knew,” Rudolf says. “He said he thought it wasn’t a big deal.”
Ian takes a deep breath. “Well, I don’t think that changes anything.”
“Dude, yeah, it does,” Rudolf keeps at it. “You have a chance. That’s something, right?”
Ian doesn’t seem convinced. He just looks uncomfortable, like he doesn’t want to talk about this anymore.
“Maybe,” he says simply. There’s a sense of finality in his tone like he’s putting an end to the conversation. He looks off into space again after that.
I chain smoke a few cigarettes, mostly because I don’t know what else to say or do. When I’m about to reach for another, Rudolf takes it out of my hand.
“We can go back inside,” he says, handing the cigarette back to me. He looks kind of shocked by what he just did like he acted without thinking.
Ian sees the expression on Rudolf’s face and chuckles. “Yeah, alright, we can go back in.”I smile at Rudolf to try to ease the tension. Then I follow them inside, stashing the cigarette back in my pack.
By now, it’s louder and a lot more crowded. I don’t recognize anyone, but that’s alright. Maybe it will be better if we don’t see anyone we know tonight. Ian’s surveying the room, probably looking for Everest. He gives up quickly, though.
“I might go check things out in the kitchen,” I say. “Wanna tag along?”
“Sure,” Rudolf nods, letting me lead the way.
Ian doesn’t say anything but follows after us regardless. There are a few people hanging around the table and like Amanda mentioned, one of them’s doing trash rat tats. I greet them with a nod and then pick up some flash sheets sitting on the table, looking them over. Some of them are pretty basic, but some are cool. There’s one of a gory eyeball and another of a fat pigeon that I somehow love as much as I hate.
“Are you getting one?” Rudolf asks, glancing over the designs in my hands.
“Yeah, I think so.”
Ian looks along with us, but I know this really isn’t his scene.
“Which one do you think you’ll get?” he asks.
“Hmm, probably this one,” I say, pointing to the eyeball.
“It’s so gross,” he cringes.
“Yeah, I like gross shit.”
“You should see her art,” Rudolf says fondly.
I smile at him. “Think this suits me?”
“Yeah, it’ll look good.”
When the current crowd clears, the person holding the tattoo gun looks at us and asks if there’s anything sparking our interest.“This one’s pretty cool,” I say, handing them the sheet.
“Sweet,” they say. “Take a seat.”
So, I do. The tattooer isn’t super chatty, but that’s fine. I kind of prefer it. I decide to get the work on my arm in the small space I have left between two stick-n-pokes I got a few years back. Ian and Rudolf sit with me, but Ian just looks queasy.
“You don’t have to stick around,” I assure him, but he forces a smile and asks me if it hurts.
“Not really,” I say, hoping that’ll help somehow.
That’s the truth. It doesn’t really hurt. You get used to it.
A few minutes in, a new group of people pile into the kitchen. Amongst them, of all fucking people, is Cameron.
Fucking fantastic.
Rudolf doesn’t notice right away. He’s busy staring at my arm, but after a minute, he looks up at me. I must seem uncomfortable because he raises an eyebrow and then turns around. His expression immediately slips as he makes eye contact with Cameron. Then he turns back to me, looking dead-eyed.
When Cameron spots us, he wastes no time heading over. Rudolf wastes no time leaving.
I wish I could follow him, but I literally can’t.
“Hah, of course you’d be into this lame shit,” he says to me, ignoring Rudolf’s disappearing act.
The tattooer scoffs under their breath.
“Cameron, fuck off,” I say limply. “I’m not in the mood.”
“Ow,” he feigns hurt. “Watch it, Avery.”
Cameron takes the seat that Rudolf was previously occupying. “Hey,” he says to Ian.
“Hey,” Ian responds, looking unsure of the whole situation. “Who are you?”
“Cameron Fant,” he says, holding his hand out. “You?”
Ian accepts his hand slowly, giving it a firm shake.
“Ian.”
God. Who introduces themselves like that? Was Cameron always this annoying, or did I just not see it?
“Are you one of Avery’s friends?” Cameron asks, probably prepared to make himself look perfect in the eyes of a new, handsome stranger. Ian nods, and Cameron asks where we met.
“Weight class.”
“Why haven’t I seen you around before?”
“This isn’t really my thing.”
Cameron laughs and then touches Ian’s shoulder. “Well, yeah, this is awful,” he says. “I’ll show you something better.”
Ian’s face is red again. Cameron probably loves that. He’s oozing confidence and it fucking sucks. I wish I could tell Ian right now just how awful and disgusting Cameron is, but I can't. Not without betraying Rudolf's trust. Instead, I zone out and stare down at my arm, trying not to listen.
Cameron keeps flirting with Ian and it’s honestly the vilest thing I’ve ever heard. I’ve seen these moves a million times before, but now, with everything coming into the light, I can barely keep it together.“Cam, screw off, you’re not even his type,” I say before I can help myself.
Cameron’s eyes snap to me and he looks pissed. Ian looks uncomfortable too, but screw them both! It’s literally just the truth. Besides, this isn’t something Ian wants to get mixed up in even for one second. He knows Cameron’s an ass, but he’s also charming as hell. I don’t want to risk Ian falling for the facade.
“Oh you know fuck-all,” Cameron spits at me before turning back to Ian like I never said anything at all.
Ian looks so fucking distressed and I feel bad because I know he doesn’t know how to make this stop.
“So, what do you do?” Cameron asks, crossing his arms in a way that I think is supposed to make him seem laid back.
“Uh, I just graduated,” Ian mumbles.“Wow, me too,” he says and he just sounds so damn sure of himself. “From where?”
“U of M.”
“Huh,” Cameron smiles condescendingly. “I went to the Academy of Art with Avery and Rudolf before his lame ass dropped out. I’m a sculptor.”
“I heard…” Ian says, wide-eyed. “That’s...cool?”
Ugh. Don’t encourage him!
“It is pretty cool. Probably the best job in the world. I get to do whatever I want and make all my own hours.”
Jesus Christ, he sounds so full of himself. I swear to God he’s a complete and utter fucking narcissist.
Cameron keeps talking about himself and I can’t help but notice that he sounds a little more invested than normal. I keep staring at them, trying to figure it out. Ian certainly is Cameron’s type, even if the reverse isn't true. I guess Ian looks a bit like Jackson, which is funny because Jackson looks a bit like Cameron. All these fucking white boys, man. That might be what’s keeping Cameron’s interest. He’s shallow, after all.
Just as Ian looks like he’s about to absolutely lose it, Cameron gets a text. He pulls out his phone and smirks to himself.
“I’ve got something I need to take care of,” he says to Ian. “But I’ll see you around.”
“Sure,” Ian responds.
“Later, Avery,” Cameron says to me before leaving the kitchen.
Once he’s gone, Ian leans into me and urgently whispers, “Was he hitting on me!?”
Ugh.
“Yeah,” I say with distaste.
“That’s the guy Rudolf slept with, huh?”
“Yep...” I say again, getting knots in my stomach. “He’s pretty crappy.”
Ian gives a long nod, sitting back in his seat. “That’s what Rudolf and Everest both said.”
Hopefully, that’s enough for Ian to put the idea to rest. If he rejected Rudolf’s advances before, then he’s probably not about to fall into Cameron’s trap. He’s just too nice to tell Cameron to fuck off.
When my tattoo is done, the artist wraps it for me and I pull my wallet out, handing them a few bills.
“Thanks,” I say, “This is great.”
That felt like forever. Usually, I enjoy the entire process, but Cameron ruined it. Now I just want to find Rudolf.
I wander through the house, shoving everyone who bumps into me. I am not in the fucking mood.
“Let me know if you see Rudolf,” I say to Ian.
He nods, glancing around with me for a few minutes until we find Rudolf sitting on a sofa. There are a bunch of other people sitting around him, but I can tell he probably hasn’t been talking to any of them. There’s a drink in his hand and I can’t help but wonder if it’s his first or his fifth.
“Hey, man,” I say.
He nods, but with the way his head bobs I can tell he’s pretty fucked up. Man, this sucks. I never expected to see Cameron here.
“Are you okay?” I ask.
“Fine,” he insists but his voice is high and slurry.
I offer him a hand, pulling him up from the sofa and away from the crowd of folks hovering in the living room.
“Cameron’s pretty full of himself, huh?” Ian says.
I think he’s trying to make Rudolf feel better, but it doesn’t work. Rudolf just scowls.
“What was he doin’? Talkin’ about how talented and popular and amazing he is?”
“Pretty much,” Ian says.
“Typical. Was he flirting?” Rudolf keeps wobbling against me, but at least he’s coherent.
“Um...I don’t know. Maybe a bit?”
Everest reappears finally, clapping a hand on Ian’s shoulder. “Hey! Sorry I got swept off! How’s it going?”
“I got a tattoo,” I say, lifting my arm.
“Woah, sweet!” he exclaims. “You’ll have to show me later.”
“Cameron decided to show up,” Rudolf adds, sharing a look of disdain with Everest.
“Oh… ew,” Everest says slowly. “Man, that guy is so lame.”
“He hung around, so I left,” Rudolf shares.
“God, yeah I would’ve, too…I would’ve peaced right the fuck out.”
“Yeah, plus watching him flirt with Ian would’ve made me want to puke. Glad I missed that.”
Everest’s jaw slacks. He looks at Ian and then back at Rudolf.
“Are you kidding? That guy really has no shame.”
Ian laughs awkwardly. “Yeah, I didn’t really know how to react…”
The tension doesn’t go away. It just keeps building. Ian and Everest don’t know how truly foul Cameron is. They think Rudolf is upset because he slept with Cameron and things went south, but that’s not even close.
We stand around for a minute and Rudolf keeps drinking. Hell, we all keep drinking, except Ian who looks like he just wants to go home.
“What did Cameron even say to you?” Everest mumbles, pushing a topic I really wish he’d just drop.
“Mm…” Ian twists his face like he’s trying to remember. “He mostly just talked about how he’s an artist. He told me I’d like the party scene if I went places with him.”
“Gross,” Everest scoffs.
“That’s never happened to me before,” Ian confesses. “A guy’s never hit on me like that before.”
He seems put off, but still somehow excited. I wish he wasn’t, but I’m trying to understand. Sometimes it just feels nice to have someone acknowledge you, especially when you’ve been in the closet so long. It makes you feel less alone, even if that person is a total scumbag.
“Yeah, well Cameron’s a douche,” Everest snaps.
“Oh, yeah, I mean, I know that,” Ian looks taken aback. “I’m not going to keep talking to him or anything.”
Yikes. I wonder what has Everest so riled up over this. Did Rudolf tell him what happened?
Everyone seems uncomfortable and I’m starting to think that we should just get the hell out of here. It’s such a fucking drag that Cameron sucked the life out of our whole night like this.
Too bad my best friend turned out to be an absolute nightmare of a person.
Too bad my ex-girlfriend hates me now because she can’t see how shitty he is.
Too bad I clearly have the world’s worst taste in people.
“Do you guys want to head home?” I decide to ask, hoping someone will take the bait.
“Not yet,” Everest says, his arms crossed. I look to Rudolf and he just frowns.
Ugh. Jesus Christ. This is why I hate going out! This is why I hate parties. I literally never have a good time. Why do I even try anymore?
I hate having to manage everyone’s feelings!
“Okay,” I scuff the sole of my shoe against the floor.
If I can’t get these guys to leave, maybe I can make Cameron want to. Then I could enjoy myself again.
#lgbt books#lgbt writers#queer writers#wlw#wlw writing#qpoc#qpoc artist#once again not me I’m white af but my coauthor is Lebanese 🙏🏻#book#self
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Eyes of Juniper Ch. 1 (A Metallica Fic)
Ao3 Link
Author (as known on Various sites): Lady Lover- Rockfic, Luluthechoosingcrow - AO3, theladylovingcrow - Deviantart and Wattpad, @sammy_bluebells - Instagram, @imacrowcawcaw - main Tumblr, @insannywestan - Sanny shipping Tumblr
Pairing: Lars Ulrich/James Hetfield, Kirk Hammett/Cliff Burton, Lars/Female Character (briefly), Lars/Male Character (kinda, more just awkward one sided flirting then Lars gets rescued by his knight in a ratty Motorhead shirt)
Fandom: Metallica
Tags/warnings: Sex-swap AU, early 80s era 'tallica, smut, gay smut, also het smut since the whole gender switch thing, drinking and alcohol, lots of cussing and profanity, should warn that Lars goes into detail about taking a piss cuz ya know it's new to him, Idk I'll add tags per chapter as I think of shit
Notes:
1. Okay, so I spent like months thinking about whether to do this or not. On the one hand, yes this has so much potential to be fun (and I've seen some other sex swap stories i like). On the other hand, a lot of the whole sex/Gender swap thing is really stereotypical gender shit and goes against what I personally believe. But, creative juices won out and I'll try to keep true to character as much as possible while also making this funny and not too misogynistic (if that's possible).
2. This is a work in progress! I started it a year and a half ago, and now a friend is helping me continue
3. This story is inspired by the song 'Jewel of the Summertime' by Audioslave (on their album Revelations) I love this song and it is awesome you should totally go listen to it.
4. The witch-lady is inspired by Aine, Celtic goddess of love, summer, wealth, and sovereignty. I literally just googled 'goddess of love' then scrolled through a list to find someone other than Aphrodite (don't get me wrong I love Greek mythology but it just wasn't right for this fic) and came across this girl. I only did a quick Wikipedia read, I'm not planning on going too heavy into her myth and more just using her for the plot but.... If anybody is more well versed in Celtic mythology and I seem to get something wrong, please feel free to comment and I'll try my best to make it accurate!
5. Woo damn that was a lot of stuff, I don't blame you if you didn't bother reading it. Now, on with the show!
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1984 (Lars' POV)
The first thing I felt when I woke up was this odd sense of.... well, just something being fuckin' off. Like I was missing something, but also like I had gained something? I felt like a brand-new person, although in my gut I was still me.... Man, I must have had WAY too much Jager last night, it's fucking with my head.
I slowly peeled the itchy fleece blanket off of my body and rolled onto the floor, which was about a foot from the bare mattress. We really needed to invest in some sheets, especially if we wanted to keep bringing chicks back to the house. Apparently, most girls are not at all impressed by stained, lumpy mattresses with almost no bedding on them.
Speaking of girls and mattresses, didn't I bring one home last night? I raised my head slightly from its position from the threadbare carpet and looked at the bed, trying to see if Anna (Was that her name?) was still there. Yep, there was a naked hippy still passed out in my bed, sweet!
I groaned quietly as I stood and shuffled my way out the door and down the hall to the bathroom. It was then I noticed that I didn't really have the usual alcohol-and-early-morning-and-piss induced erection, but my bladder was still straining. Huh, weird.
Whatever. I just wanted to pee, get rid of that feeling in my gut, and get that dead possum taste out of my mouth. Pushing open the door and wincing as the creaky hinges screeched through my headache, I pulled down my boxers and reached for my dick.... What the fuck?
WHAT THE FUCK?
WHERE WAS MY MOTHERFUCKIN DICK?!
Trying not to panic, I looked down, squeezing my eyes shut for a moment so I wouldn't have to see right away. But, of course, that kind of defeated the purpose of looking down, so I opened them again. No dick. The hell was going on?
Taking a deep, calming breath, I tried to think through this rationally. My dick, for whatever reason, was not where it was supposed to be. But, my bladder was still full and begging to be released, so obviously my system or whatever was still working. That need to pee was turning into a burning pain, so I tried to come up with a solution. If I don't have a cock, then I can piss through....what, exactly? Is there anything down there at all? What is even going on!?
Pulling in another deep breath through my nose, I let it hiss out between clenched teeth as I slowly, so slowly, touched my fingers to my abdomen and moved them downwards, dreading what I would find. Annnnnd....... Yep, there it was.
Velvety soft lips, slick, pungent juices; anatomy I knew so well but never, EVER expected to feel on myself. My crisis would have to wait a minute, though, 'cause my bladder was going to explode and no dick be damned I needed to do something about it.
Gingerly sitting my ass down on the toilet (god, so weird sitting down just to piss) I tried to slowly let it out. The feeling was...well there was certainly relief of the pressure, but it also felt strange in a way I couldn't really describe. I could possibly get used to it, not that I'm planning on staying like this or anything.
Cringing as I wiped, I slowly pulled the boxers back up to my hips that I just now noticed were a little wider than usual. And my hands, were they smaller? Softer? My chest too....HOLY SHIT I HAVE BOOBS! That, I might be able to get used to.
I turned to the mirror, and was quite shocked at what I saw. There was a girl standing there, with large, doe-like green eyes staring back at me from underneath brown bangs. She had a nice tan on her upper body, although her breasts were still pale where she clutched at them, small rosy nipples poking through her fingers. A pair of black cotton boxers stretched tight around the small curve of her hips, but hung loose around her milky thighs that almost touched. And this...this chick was me. ME.
Shaking my head, I splashed some water onto my face and rubbed my eyes, hoping it was just a fucked up dream. No such luck.
I was considering hiding in the bathroom forever, because no way in hell could I let the guys see me like this, let alone figure out how to explain, when I heard a scream. It sounded a lot like Kirk's voice, so I pushed my problems to the back of my head and ran into the hallway, stopping dead in my tracks at what I saw.
Anna, or whatever her name was, stood at the top of the stairs, dressed in flowing black robes with green Celtic designs all over them. She had jewels and charms hanging from her waist, wrists, neck, and ears, each tinkling as she tossed some sort of... Powder onto a very shocked looking Kirk. Or at least, I was pretty sure it was Kirk. He (she?) seemed to be in the same boat as me as far as bodies were concerned at the moment.
With a final dusting of powder, witchy-chick turned to me and smirked. "I hope you learn your lesson, I'll be back in a week. And as for you...." She turned to Kirk, "Well, you're just too damn cute! I couldn't resist seeing what a pretty girl you'd make!"
"This is your fault? You bitch! " I yelled. "Why the hell did you do this to us? Who are you? Change us back, then get the fuck out! I don't wanna be a damn girl, and neither does Kirk!" God this was fucking insane, that chick was crazy!
She hissed at me, eyes flashing in a way that could not be human. "Now you listen, GIRL. You'll stay like this for as long as I deem fit. You need to learn some respect for women, and being one is the best way to do that. I suppose you don't remember what you did last night?" She asked, looking bored and ready lo go fuck up someone else's life.
I thought hard, then it came creeping back to me. The bar, the Jager, the flirting with a group of girls, copping a feel and getting slapped, then her changing her mind and coming home with me, talking dirty in her ear, then unworldly sex, her whispering what sounded like a spell in my ear as I came... Holy shit.
"Is this about me grabbing your ass? I'm sorry! Please don't do this!" I begged, finally starting to let the situation sink in and desperation set. This could not be happening.
"Hmph," she snorted, "Begging isn't going to get you anywhere. I've seen humans beg for much less, and they still didn't get it. No, you'll love your life as a woman for a week, both of you, and hopefully you'll come to realize the struggles and terror that comes with it. If you've learned your lessons and are truly sorry, then you will be turned back. If not... Well you'll just have to stay like this until you do."
And just like that, she turned with a flourish and disappeared into thin air. My morning could not get any crazier, I was sure if it. But, because I wasn't actually sure and was suddenly doubting all logical occurrences in the world, I knocked on the wooden railing. That done, I turned towards Kirk.
He (seriously, do I call us he's or she's now? This is so fucked up) was shaking like a leaf, looking like he'd fall over any moment. I went over to grab him, calm him down, something.
"Shh shh, it's all right, Kirk," I muttered in his ear,
awkwardly patting his back. I never thought I'd need to, but it really fucking sucks I can't comfort him any better than this. It was like this sour feeling in my chest that nestled in right next to my heart, whispering how awful I was at this and how he's probably mad at me for getting him into this situation.
Before I could ask him if he wanted to punt me out of a window, though, I heard some shuffling and talking coming from downstairs. James and Cliff were headed up here. As much as I wanted to hide for a week until my fuckin' "lesson" was up, I couldn't exactly drag Kirk into the hall closet in his current state, so I stood my ground.
"Hey, ladies, we do appreciate the service you've done our ugly ass friends, but could you keep the cat fight down until you've left the house?"
Ah, James, the man still didn't know how to talk to women after all this time. He was either too shy to form a sentence, or he put on this macho bravado that turned him into a drink asshole. Either way, this lady was not pleased.
By now I guess the guys had reached the landing Kirk and I were at and saw me hugging him, because Cliff chimed in, "Aww, they've made up! Good! Now, can I ask what exactly you two were telling about so loudly that it woke me and my boy James up? Did Lars do something?"
My back straightened at that, and I turned my head to him indignantly. "I did fucking not!" I retorted, even though apparently this whole situation was my fault. No need for them to know that, though.
"Holy shit, Lars!?!" James screamed.
I sighed. "Hi, Jamie."
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Chapter 2
#metallica#metallica fanfic#fanfic#fic#fanfiction#lars ulrich#kirk hammett#james hetfield#cliff burton#cliff my man#kirky wooi#jlars#kliff#papa het#little lars#babytallica#early metallica#1980s#alternate universe#sex swap#sex swap au#james x lars#kirk x cliff#my writing#lulucrowproductions#fluff#crack#humor#slow burn#alcoholica
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ey.
alright, so. yes, it’s your boy, big z. let’s talk a bit. i don’t know where this is gonna go, but i’ll be frank with you guys: being away from this app has done wonders for me. seriously. i’ve lost weight, my skin’s better, my productivity’s increased- people say that as a meme but no, i’m serious. a few months ago i was telling my friends “I considered going back to tumblr but like, lmao. im happy so why would i?” because frankly, being on here does not make me happy.
i’m very good at curating my content, avoiding goofy bitches- a master at the craft, ik ik, but it’s not about that. i can ignore, block, and continue about my day as it was without caring much about a 19 year old who believes their a minor and an angel or some shit, w/e. the goofies aren’t even the issue. i didn’t come here with a plan on what to talk about so this is all just coming at once because i keep thinking “tumblr’s kind of the best place for a multimuse, and i know some good peeps.” that’s my thought process when considering returning, but guys. we need to address the issue: it’s hard to find this enjoyable. i certainly know it’s not just me. let me go in depth.
fiction is fiction. i don’t care what kind of writing you do, be it kink-writing, fluff, dark-fiction / darkfics, developmental, etc. people have gotten to a point where they see something they don’t like and they can’t remove themselves from the situation. with kids, it’s expected, but people into their late twenties continue to act like this-- but this isn’t my main reason why i think it’s no longer enjoyable as it was in early 2010s-- it’s cause back then, you didn’t really have to worry about your partners being two-faced. i swear people on here think they’re on some anime villain shit, i swear to god i’ve literally had a friend who made a discord server, set it up, built it up & made it for people who want to write with each other & aren’t mentally harmed by whatever topics they included noncon, dubcon, etc. don’t care- if you aren’t down to read, you don’t need to. that’s fine, it’s dandy. what happened was that someone pulled some, idk black widow shit and joined the server pretending to be a writer who enjoys darkfiction and woe and behold, they were some goofy bitch who leaked all the logs / urls -- and i gotta ask: what is the point. don’t say it’s “to warn others” cause no it ain’t bitch lmao. it’s to shame them, dogpile, & report-- let’s not get into the weird, disgusting high that these people get. feeling like they really CHANGED something in the world for “exposing” a discord full of people that deadass just wanna write fanfiction. yeah, much change, very w0ke. doge meme that stupid shit, lmao.
i know im rambling but man. okay, back to the whole two facething. i just dont feel comfortable sharing anything about myself. i’ve literally lied about my location, the place i’m living in- things as simple as me being in collage or not. why? cause goofy bitches love to dox, play games, threaten livelyhoods and talk the most fatdick game on the internet but when someone gets hurt they will crawl into a hole and pity the shit out themselves because uwu no wrong- bullshit bro. legit, i can’t make friends on here because it feels like everyone is taking screencaps of everything, not even because they themselves are twofaced, but you can’t take the risk of not having “””recipts”””. like bro, we’re having a CONVERSATION. i literally didn’t wanna give out disco/rds the last time i was here cause i felt that could be a method to dox me. stupid shit, right? it feels like this is some stupidass anime political battleground. this kinda had no point, it’s just me voicing my feelings. still, if you take anything out of this: for god sakes, leave each other alone. stop with this wannabe mean girls shit. it’s tumblr rp & it never shouldve been that deep. i absolutely don’t give a shit about “reputation” - i’m on the internet lmao, neither should you all. also, one more thing: if your friendship is conditional, then it isn’t one at all. if you believe someone will no longer be friends with you cause they find out you like to read lmao fuckin noncon? ditch. it’s not worth it. if some mf just said “if you like uhh homes/tuck, i will block you” that’s how it deadass sounds. goofy shit. that’s all, feel free to ignore, reblog, idc. stay safe
#hope everyone's good#dont see myself coming back rn possibly in the future#ill clean things up a bit#but for now? eh#ooc /#idk my tag fuck the fancy shit we're too old for it#edit: damn it really been half a year#amazing
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This isn’t even really my personal take or what I personally plan to do, but seeing fandom unironically play itself on engagement time and time and time again, maybe this will break through to some people.
So you’re big mad about SPN! I might be relatively at peace with it, but you’re not! That’s fine. Allow me to actually help you guys learn how to send a message that doesn’t end up with the business team sitting smugly!
There was a nonnie a few weeks back that told me I was ~arrogant~ for telling them to stop engaging the content. Something about privilege. What Nonnie lacks perspective on-- on most social media platforms, any engagement is good engagement.
I’m using tumblr as the platform to even send this out because it’s the least important among social media platforms. It doesn’t clock on, say, Nielsen, and it’s ad space is relatively laughable despite trying to clean up its image.
But just like I told everyone for the last two years, and just like the suit ridiculously preached to me as if I hadn’t already been preaching it: to them, all engagement is good engagement.
There’s nothing you can do this late to change anything. What you CAN do is send a message to the wigs by letting them know they seriously fucked up their demographics and understanding of a product.
That means stop using the hashtags on prime media. Don’t #SPN or #Supernatural. Don’t even talk about SPN or Supernatural hashtag or not. Don’t engage them. Don’t argue with them. Don’t even complain about them. I know it’s really, really tempting, but on a marketing level /that shit still benefits them./
I know people think they’re making some kind of Statement(TM) by ranting on and on and on and fucking ON about Supernatural for years at a time, but it’s still engagement. All you really accomplish is getting relative keywords and ideas blacklisted alongside the shit you’re constantly bitching about. If they’re getting engagement and discussion (good) but it’s constantly attached to one group of people or idea that is starting to become too aggressive, that group is now a blacklist group.
I have been trying to teach people this for years but nobody has wanted to listen and kept digging fuckin’ holes. But maybe, just MAYBE, now that the show is over, you can stop.
Don’t tune into channels re-airing it.
Don’t stream any services. Cancel any related subscriptions.
Don’t look it up on youtube (yes, I’m aware that means even my channel will suffer), don’t watch reaction videos, don’t go to articles that talk about it.
Don’t even breathe about it. It doesn’t exist.
If you absolutely MUST buy yourself a copy of it, go to places like second hand book stores that sell DVDs, because the resale doesn’t go to them but it’s still a legally purchased product.
Get everybody you know to do the same. Spread this by word of mouth on other platforms that DON’T benefit them in any way: tell your friends in discord to adopt the habit, tell your friends in DM.
As it is even tumblr isn’t *totally* useless to them for PR, it’s still engagement, it’s just not as... important? And this sentiment needs to be posted somewhere to get it out there, so it’s the best go.
I’ll tell you what *doesn’t* hurt them at all: people engaging the content, positive or negative, for all eternity. Congrats, you’re part of the PR machine.
All y’all really do, doing that, is hurt each other. And they don’t care.
Welcome to marketing. It’s machiavellian, but it’s how things work.
So if you actually plan to like. Make an impact instead of make noise. Actually just. Stop making noise. Entirely.
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I want to have them all on Tumblr, so. Here are my reaction posts, in order, for Resolution of the Daleks and season 12, part 1!
Resolution of the Daleks
Thoughts on Doctor Who - Resolution! Spoilers, obviously!
Okay, negative first, just to get it out of the way. Doctor Who, I really appreciate that you consistently have queer minor characters and queer couples. Just super casual and all, as it should be. Now can you please stop killing off half of said couples? Angstrom's wife, Frankie, now this young guy? It's really not cool.
Don't think the voiceover worked. I feel the prologue would have worked better with just visuals.
Again, Yaz didn't have much to do. The Doctor got a ton of action, Ryan and Graham both had significant interactions with Aaron, Yaz was... just kind of there. I'm hoping that when the show comes back in a year, now that Ryan has largely dealt with his issues, Yaz will get more attention?
UNIT was killed by Brexit?! Fuckin' rude!
Okay, on to the positive!
The Dalek was, frankly, fucking scary. Despite knowing that the Doctor would beat it, obviously, it caused huge swathes of damage and racked up a... rather high body count. Like it felt like a proper threat. Also, its ability to stop the TARDIS tracking it and stuff. Lin's terror felt extremely genuine and it was just nice and horrific overall, like - if it wasn't for the Doctor, it would feel like a genuine threat to the entire Earth.
(Also, it shut down the wifi. On New Years Day. What a monster!)
Oh man that Dalek laughter. Creepy as fuck. The Doctor dragging it in via hologram to dare it to laugh in her face? Fucking iconic.
"I've learned to think like a Dalek." Oof.
Doctor vs Dalek. Not just the physical aspect, but the mental part - the Doctor recognising the seriousness of it, but also having that element of cockiness ("Oh, mate") because, frankly, she's dealt with bigger threats. She's right when she points out that the biggest problem will be if regular humans try to engage it!
Elements of Dark!Doctor when she asks the team - almost desperately - if she gave it enough chances, if she was nice enough. Because the Doctor can get fucking scary around Daleks and she knows it. She's nice. She's friendly. But she's also the Doctor, and the Doctor has done some really damn questionable things to stop the Daleks, and she knows that. Fantastically done and I still desperately want some proper Dark!Doctor.
Really liked the parallels between the Doctor using scrap to make her sonic screwdriver, vs the Dalek using scrap to make its armour. The Doctor makes a tool, the Dalek makes items of war. Of course, well, the Doctor is probably more dangerous just with a swiss army sonic than a Dalek blaster...
I love how the whole, "Dads are complicated... so I've heard" bit could refer to either the loom thing or the Doctor having actual parents or the Doctor being a shitty dad themself XD
Graham was so excited to show off the TARDIS! Like he's just going, "How cool is this?!"
There were some legitimately funny moments! Graham's chair, "I suppose... we'll have to have a... conversation?", "Junkyard chic"... UNIT was killed by Brexit like that's so awful but. But in a kind of funny way.
Okay, now the unsure. Ryan, Graham, and Aaron. Ryan and Graham have sorted out their issues - but Aaron is still such a big overshadowing part of it that it's a bit of a shock when he comes back in. As someone with a similarly shit biological father, I was completely empathising with Ryan in the coffee shop conversation. And I do understand why they wanted reconciliation, so they showed Aaron as acknowledging his bullshit and Ryan ultimately choosing to forgive and save him.
But it's just... not that easy. It's not all going to be perfect just because they stopped a Dalek together. Aaron's neglect hurt Ryan really badly, and it just felt... too easy? Like it helped that Aaron was genuinely contrite, and that he had that good stepfather talk with Graham, but just... yeah, not sure how I feel about it, honestly.
The Doctor's first words to him being, "You weren't at Grace's funeral. Ryan waited for you, you let him down" were so, so good. Like the Doctor is just going "fuck you I'm his father now". Like tbh I think she was 100% prepared to yeet him off the TARDIS and be done with it. Like damn don't emotionally hurt one of her crew.
Some wonderfully savage lines, though. The Doctor's, "You're almost making up for your parenting deficit!"; Aaron and Ryan's, "Is that how you talk to your dad?" "I don't know, he's not been around"; Graham's fucking smirk when Ryan pointedly calls him 'Gramps'.
I did see a suggestion that would have made it much better - instead of the Dalek capturing Aaron, it captures Ryan. First, it ups the threat in the mind of the Doctor and Team TARDIS - this isn't some dickhead, this is one of them. And instead, it's Aaron who reaches out to Ryan, Aaron who risks his life, Aaron who has to come through for Ryan, instead of the other way around. Also would have tied in beautifully with, "Family isn't about DNA, or a name. It's about what you do, and you haven't done enough."
Also, 'srs tech skillz'. With a Z. Doctor why.
In conclusion, I am going to fight Nigel Farage for killing UNIT.
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Spyfall part 1
Current response to Doctor Who: making a near-literal SDKFJHGSDASDKFH sound, grabbing a cushion, nearly throWING THE CUSHION.
More intelligent commentary when my brain comes back online.
-
Okay. Am calm. Am good! We're good.
MAJOR SPOILERS for Doctor Who: Spyfall, part 1!
So yeah I actually literally screamed (kind of... scream-laugh-holy-shit-yes). Like, even before Dhawan finished speaking the, "Or should I say spy... Master?" line because of the way he had said 'spymaster' in full in the line before and there's nothing that grabs my brain like that one word in that one context. It wasn't quite as mindblowing as the Utopia reveal, since, let's face it, it's only been a season since we last saw that magnificant arsehole, but still.
(Actually, since I didn't watch Twelve's run, the last time I saw them was exactly a decade ago in The End of Time, broadcast New Years Day 2010. And I still fucking cry over, "Get out of the way." So. That may have been why I literally screamed lmao)
I mean. It's the Master. I can't not. They're my favourite jerk. This is probably slightly concerning.
Anyway. Comments!
The good
Episode was just flat-out exciting. It reminded me both of the Three and Ten eras, a bit? Fun gadgets, fancy suits, and what ends up being a giant game! Did start wondering when they were talking about spies and codes and stuff. It's basically a puzzle that's been set up for the Doctor to solve. Plus, the way she was pretty much enlisted into it! Thirteen and Dhawan!Master might end up having a more Pertwee-Delgado-esque dynamic, maybe? I would be down for that!
(My introductory episode to the Master was The Mind of Evil. Let's just put it that way XD)
"I'm her best enemy." <3
I mean, in retrospect, isolated house full of high-tech stuff and a wall full of books about the Doctor... oh honey. Long, looong game of playing Spies and Conspiracies just for, apparently, the sheer funsies of it. Oh, honey. They're such a disaster and I love them.
The reveal scene, Jodie's acting. The way she just... freezes and hunches in on herself. She's been hiding her past more than other Doctors have in the past, and suddenly, here is her past!! Right here!! Laughing and joking and right there in front of her! And she's just like, "Ohhh shit, I was not ready to have this conversation again..."
Yasmin and Ryan's dynamic. I do like that they split up the usual combos of Thirteen-Yasmin and Graham-Ryan for once, because I do like seeing the way they play off each other! It makes them feel more cohesive as a group. I liked Ryan trying to comfort Yasmin after her experience.
Post-reveal, I'm now wondering if the weird zappy forest thing is the Master's TARDIS? Something to do with changing and processing DNA into something else? Something based around neurons, with the electric travelling system? Am also wondering what happened to Yasmin while in there, since she seemed to be processed in some way, and I'm wondering if she had part of her DNA rewritten as well - or maybe if she's been replaced entirely, like she's currently piloting an alien version of her own body while her actual self is still in there. They did already do that with Flesh!Amy, though.
Once this arc is over, I think Thirteen is definitely going to have to sit down and tell the Fam who the hell she actually is. Graham is having some serious questions, and the Master was definitely egging that on, pre-reveal.
How much do I love that even in a tux, the Doctor still has the culottes and boots? A lot, that is how much. Also, how much do I love the Doctor in a suit and on a motorbike? A lot, that is how much.
"I've had an upgrade." <3
Thirteen playing Snap. It's okay, Thirteen, you still win my heart <3
"Worst! Uber! Ever!!"
"Kisses!" Yes, we know ;) They've been texting! Someone write me a WhatsApp chat fic with plenty of subtext and double meaning, I require it. Also, memes. You know it's true. The Master isn't a Time Lord, they're a Meme Lord.
"Everything you think you know is a lie." Season hook? :o
The hmm
Main concern is how they're handling the Master's characterisation? Last we saw, they were so ready to jump the Doctor ship. Now it's back to games. Kind of wondering if that means the Master is just at the point of being resigned that they and the Doctor just don't work and so is going back to games because at least it makes them happy, but I'm happy to wait until next week to see how things play out!
Did see a suggestion that this is the Master from one of the alternate universes (or at least that seems to be the general consensus on why there were multiple maps), so not actually necessarily the same version as Missy. Alternatively, this could actually be a pre-Missy version! Maybe between Simm!Master and Missy, since we never actually see that regeneration?
Actually, if this is the one immediately before Missy and this two-parter ends with the Master regenerating and we actually do get Thirteen and Missy together on screen I may cry.
(Like I'm aro-ace and agender but I'm still so gay for both of them. There is no word other for this emotion other than 'I'm gay'.)
I kind of wish someone had double-checked the name of the company because VOR running the world is. Is. "Right now, VOR is more powerful than most nations." Just. *pinches bridge of nose* Like okay you know how we say 'oh yeah just google it' 'yeah I googled it' are they really gonna say 'yeah I just VO
'I'm going to V
I can't say it. I can't.
Apparently the Australia scenes were filmed in South Africa. Kind of assumed it wasn't really Australia as soon as I saw actually greenery in the background h e h.
Highkey wish I could have seen Missy and Thirteen together. Dhawan!Master is very fun so far but. Missy and Thirteen. See comment above about the Master's characterisation!
...ABC are you really going to keep to Thursday night broadcasts even after the UK switches their Sunday nights / our Monday mornings? Well that's a good way to guarantee I'll be watching them online first! I was happy to wait twelve hours or so so I could watch it with Mum, but like hell I'm going to wait three and a half days!
In conclusion, am dead, send help, is it Monday morning yet?
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Spyfall part 2
Thoughts on Doctor Who: Spyfall, part 2!
GALLIFREY LOOOOORE.
Oh man I'm hyped. We got a teeny teaser to the Timeless Child way back last decade but now we may actually get to see what the fuck is going on. And hell, if nothing else, at least the discovery is being teased to be so devastating it did undo Missy's characterisation. If this incarnation of the Master is after her, at least. Still not necessarily anything to suggest that. The Master will likely be recurring over this season, so we'll find out more, at least!
God, the Master is so fucked up. Like. He's seen something apparently so massively traumatic that he had to destroy his own planet and legitimately does look broken by it? Unless he was acting, but I did not get that impression from the message at the end. And the only way he can think of to get the Doctor's attention is to start his old tricks? Not sure if it's better or worse for him to be pre-Missy tbh.
It's just... such an interesting dynamic. Also I really want to read into the whole... scene where the Master asks the Doctor to kneel and call him 'Master' in front of everyone - then, when she does (defiantly! Stubbornly!), he... kneels to be at the same level as her. Like, "I'm going to play these BDSM-esque power games with you but when it comes down to it, I still consider us equal."
Anyway the Master is def a service top.
This comment from Tumblr user upslapmeal:
"'why would it stop? I mean how else would I get your attention’ what did I say about the Master being like a cat knocking things off shelves"
I mean. Yeah.
"Contact." Old school.
The Companions! They get a capital C because they were rad as hell. I love them all deciding that what they do next is: carry on to save the world. Like they're all heroic af without the Doctor and it's so good.
"Don't make me do a soft-shoe shuffle!"
And questioning at the end, oooh man. There are some Implications there, yeah. They've found out some surface information, yes, but no real hint at the deeper trauma. And given what this coming season is hinting at, I strongly suspect we will indeed be getting that deeper trauma and maybe even Dark!Doctor. Gallifrey does tend to bring it out of them...
The whole on-the-run thing seemed to definitely be a callback to Sound of Drums. Uh, what's that going to do long-term? Send out a worldwide message saying, "Sorry, our bad, they're fine"? I mean, last time that happened... okay, Jack was already with Torchwood and so is used to Not Really Existing, but Martha definitely couldn't go back to fuckin' medical school. She ended up at UNIT and then went independent. They did not return to their normal lives.
Barton: needs a goddamn punch. He killed his mother what the fuck. On the plus side, at least he seems to have thoroughly destroyed his career? Be interesting to see if he reappears later, you don't go from the most powerful person on the planet to massive pariah overnight without Repercussions.
On to our guest characters! I hate to brag but I guessed who Ada was as soon as I heard her first name and saw her outfit. I mean the computers theme was already there, who else would she be? :D And I admittedly didn't know who Noor Inayat Khan was except in passing, but still. Little upset about the erased memories (Donna ;_; ), but I can see why the Doctor did it and like... this way, I'm glad they were able to avoid the implications of, "Ada only developed computing because she had already seen the future." Like people said that with Rosa Parks even though the Doctor said explicitly to only ensure there were enough seats filled and the act itself was all Rosa, so they may have wanted to play it safe.
I... really want to comment on how Ada definitely was crushing on the Doctor (and really, who wouldn't?), but she was a real person so I shall avoid those implications. (But really though!)
Doctor how many times have you been in someone's liver. This is some Magic School Bus Inside The Human Body bullshit and I love it.
Doctor's recording: "First of all, you're not gonna die! Second of all, don't talk back to the screens, obviously I'm a recording and I can't hear ya. Third, don't panic. Especially you, Graham."
Graham, panicking: "I'M NOT PANICKING!"
Doctor's recording: "Yes, you were! And I did just say, don't talk back to the screens!"
Graham: "????!?!!"
I want an entire series of the Master having a really infuriating seventy-seven years on Earth. Please.
Comments on continuity issues regarding that, "It's worse than Jodrell Bank!" "Did I ever apologise for that?" "No." "Good." exchange XD;; Like people are going, "Continuity error!! It was the Pharos Project, not Jodrell Bank!!" and like. Pharos was a project. Jodrell Bank is an observatory. You can do projects at observatories. Also, you can refer to projects by location, too. Am I referring to the Canberra Deep Space Communication Project or Tidbinbilla Station? Both! They refer to the same thing! In the Whoniverse, they likely did the Pharos Project at Jodrell Bank, and just had some lighthearted bantz about that time where the Master killed the Doctor, no biggie.
So, onwards to... an apparently unrelated episode for next week! Also, the Kassavin? Still there. Like. The Master only gave suggestions. They still have all those agents everywhere! They're still ready to act! And yeah, now they have the Master in their hands, so... I wonder if they'll make the Timeless Child a long, ongoing arc, and have the much more immediate threat of the Kassavin as the season finale?
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Orphan 55
Thoughts on Doctor Who - Orphan 55!
...whew.
First thought: anvilicious, but some anvils need to be dropped, because, uh, have you seen the world lately.
It feels like quite a brittle episode? Even beyond the immediate tension of 'there are large angry creatures trying to kill everyone', there's just this sense of... like, tension. There's the tension between Benni and Vilma, which at first is kind of a sweet tension then becomes a life-threatening and sad tension. There's the tension between Roger Parslow Silas and his dad, with Silas not being taken seriously (although I do think him running out while they're in life-threatening danger is a bit much). The obvious and major tension between Bella and Kane that drives the whole episode, yes.
And there's also the tension amongst Team TARDIS! The episode starts with the Doctor still in Some Kinda Way about last week, and I felt a bit of tension between Yaz and Ryan? She seemed rather unimpressed by Bella, at any rate. I do like how organic the relationship between Ryan and Graham feels, at least. "It ain't the aliens that are gonna kill me, it’s worrying about you!"
Set and costume building, I felt, was kind of... eh? I liked how Tranquility itself looked, but the tunnels looked Very Generic, and some of the looks I felt didn't really work. Silas and his dad's green hair just looked very obviously fake, and I saw a description of Hyph3n-with-a-three looking like a cross between a Jellicle Cat and John Candy in Spaceballs (which... yeah, honestly). And I'm not sure about the Dregs, although I did initially have the thought that whatever the original inhabitants of the planet were, they must have been humanoid was amusingly accurate...
"I just pulled this out of a friend of mine! >:("
"Oh! ...We do not make any judgments on our guests and fully support any way you choose to enjoy yourself here at Tranquility Spa! ^_^;;"
"... ... ...It wasn't recreational! o.O"
God you could feel Hyph3n-with-a-three's embarrassment...
"If I had crayons and half a can of Spam, I could build you from scratch!" Excuse me I am at least Tofurky.
Also a logical issue on the whole journey to find Benni, because frankly, it just wasn't... sensible. Okay, bring a kid. Father of the year right there. Okay, bring an old woman. Granted, she could have insisted because it was her man-friend they were looking for, but surely she would have known she would slow them down? Her 'heroic sacrifice' felt very wasted, because dammit, she could have survived if she had stayed in the Dome where it was at least a bit safer!
"At least three eighths of a plan, right here! ...Two eights. I'll be honest, all I've got is the letter 'P'..."
So the Doctor is almost at the point of passing out from oxygen loss but hang on, let her first indulge her curiosity...
The sheer existence of orphan planets is very depressing. The sheer fact that there's at least fifty-five is very depressing.
There's an interesting comment about how straight after discussion of the reveal, the first shot of the preview is the Statue of Liberty. Very Planet of the Apes! (No apes next time, just Tesla vs Edison!) Also feeling a strong connection to Midnight (stunning resort on dangerous planet with a very personal enemy), and I saw a comment about Thirteen unintentionally The-End-Of-The-World-ing the Fam (and making a connection between 'very angry trees' and the Forests of Cheem). Bit of Ravolox. Bit of... fuck what was it... Curse of Fenric.
Although, we know that the Earth will eventually be consumed by the sun, and it was done in a way that was like... it was its time. This was not its time, was a colossal fuck-up on a planetary scale (and the Doctor continues to be 'eat the rich'), but it's also only one potential future. Which is good, because that got dark. Even more than The End of the World, even more than Utopia, even more than fuckin' Frontios, because this is the near-future. The shots we saw of the destruction were modern day! That was the Dome of the Rock you saw getting bombed!
"Be smarter than what made you." PAGING THE GOVERNMENT...
Going to put it on a solid... maybe 7/10? Some really good elements in there, but also some clunkers, and unfortunately not a patch on the same writer's It Takes You Away, which was one of the strongest of the last season.
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Nikola Tesla’s Night of Terror
Thoughts on Doctor Who - Nikola Tesla's Night of Terror!
Opinion before episode: man, Tesla's cool. Opinion after episode: man, Tesla is fuckin' cool! :D That was a well-done personality-based historical, absolutely - I think it's my second-favourite personality-based historical only to Rosa (there are other pseudo-historical based ones set in the past that I love, but they're not personality-based; the Human Nature duology is a good example).
But yeah, Tesla just came across as a really, really cool character. Genius and he knew it, yes, and the real Tesla did have some questionable views (sexism, mostly), but otherwise the archetypal Idealistic Genius who wants to change the world for the better. Contrast with Edison, who was... a businessman. With, like, a really punchable face. Still pretty intelligent, but... very, very punchable. I've read about the Tesla-Edison feud before and always sided with Tesla, and let's face it, so did the writer XD
Good mix of character combinations - with a lot of characters, it's easy for someone to get sidelined, but this managed to handle Thirteen and the Fam, and Tesla, Dorothy, and Edison, pretty well. There were some neat combinations, like Ryan and Dorothy bonding over the sense of adventure, and Graham and Edison's confrontation; I also really loved the whole conversation between Thirteen and Tesla on the joy of just... creating. There's actually a very nice overlap between arts and sciences.
Antagonists - not bad? I feel a lot of people were expecting the Racnoss, and there was such a similarity that I would have liked at least a throwaway line about how the Skithra were related or something. Ooh man she definitely brought out Dark!Doctor, though. Teleporting the queen back to the ship, specifically so she can be fried? I mean, she might have survived it. Might. And just that fantastic little change of expression when the queen asks the Doctor if she's ever seen a dead planet before! Whittaker pulled that one off.
There's a very interesting compare and contrast between the Skithra and Edison, I found. Thirteen has her speech about how once the Skithra are gone, they won't be remembered. Caput. Forgotten. They left nothing behind. Compare and contrast to Edison, who was openly accused of using other people's work, but who's able to learn from his mistakes, end on an even(ish) setting with Tesla, and who does get remembered. Which kind of stings, honestly, if you look at Tesla's actual history.
Like. Apparently that, "The man just didn't understand the American sense of humour," line was an actual historical line, according to Tesla's own records. The absolute main reason for the difference in fame and recognition is that Tesla was a genius who didn't know how to market. Edison was a marketer who could invent a bit. So in conclusion Edison is a dick and Tesla needs more respect, the end.
Favourite lines and scenes:
Tesla: "Is - is this your own design?"
Thirteen: "I made it! Mainly out of spoons! :D"
Tesla: "You're an inventor! :D"
Thirteen: "I have my moments."
Tesla: "I knew it! So you... so, you can understand how it feels, you know, when you have an idea, and - and to make it real. I don't think there's any greater thrill!"
Thirteen: "I couldn't agree more."
Tesla: "You... you spoke of aliens. People here laugh at the very idea."
Thirteen: "But not you."
Tesla: "Well, apparently I'm not like other people. It can be difficult, you know, to feel no one else sees the world the way you do. It's like you're, uh..."
Thirteen: "...out of place."
Graham: "Yeah, still. I bet you'd jump at the chance to have him back working for you, wouldn't ya?"
Edison: "Yeah?"
Graham: "Yeah!"
Edison: "How d'you figure that?"
Graham: "'Cause I had a supervisor like you at my old depot. And men like you don't pay a bloke that much attention unless you think there's a payout comin'."
Thirteen: "I wouldn't go killing me and Yaz. 'Cause Yaz... can tell you what this is."
Yaz: "It's a camera!"
Thirteen: "Bingo!" *FLASH!*
Edison: "I couldn't figure it out either."
Tesla: "The internal dimensions transcend the external."
Thirteen: *GRIN*
Edison: ._.
Thirteen: "You do realise, it's killing Edison that they want you and not him? ;D"
Graham: "Don't worry. This ain't our first rodeo!"
Ryan: "We've never been to a rodeo."
Graham: "...you're not helping, Ryan..."
Thirteen: "And what are you queen of, exactly? A stolen ship and second-hand guns? A queen of shreds and patches. You're not a ruler, you're a parasite."
Queen: "And what are you? So clever, stealing onto my ship, taking what I claim as mine. But where has it got you? No weapons. No armour. No escape. Just the desperate hope you might change my mind."
Thirteen: "No, we are way past that. I gave you your chance."
Queen: "A chance to be like you?"
Thirteen: "A chance to evolve. But you were too stupid to take it. When you die, there'll be nothing left behind - just a trail of blood and other people's brilliance. No one will even know you existed."
(Side note: I love that this speech was actually in front of the companions. They're starting to see that things are Not Okay.)
Thirteen: "Don't give up."
Yaz: "Whatever anyone says."
Tesla: "Well, let them talk. The present is theirs. I work for the future... and the future is mine."
Favourite incorrect lines:
Thirteen and Tesla, firing at the ship: "VIBE CHECK!"
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Fugitive of the Judoon
I'M GONNA... NEED A HOT MOMENT TO PROCESS THAT...
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WELL I. UH. OKAY.
lmao I'm serious I don't even know where to begin.
Uh, some very disorganised comments on Doctor Who - Fugitive of the Judoon!
I squealed when I heard Jack's voice then saw him in the flesh. I gasped audibly when 'Ruth' broke the glass. I yelped when we saw the buried TARDIS. I MAY HAVE SCREAMED A LITTLE WHEN 'RUTH' INTRODUCED HERSELF.
(Also can we talk about her outfit. That was on point.)
I'm getting a very... very early vibe? She didn't know what the sonic screwdriver was, and that was introduced with Troughton. Since we saw the Hartnell-Troughton regeneration, she must be pre-Hartnell? Maybe a Doctor whose memories were rewritten to the point that they thought the Hartnell incarnation was the earliest? Not to mention that was a pretty old-school-looking TARDIS!
Alternatively, maybe between Troughton and Pertwee? Either option has some inconsistency - if she's post Troughton, she should have known what the sonic was, although it admittedly did look very different. Plus, her TARDIS is already its police box shape, which was implied to have set in the junkyard. Also, we never actually do see the regeneration between Two and Three, and it could explain why Gallifrey was after her - she escaped after her trial after The War Games!
Definitely early, though.
Alternatively alternatively, Thirteen actually does say 'time is swirling around me'. Maybe an alternate timeline. Something to tie back to the Timeless Child?
"I've lived for thousands of years, so long I've lost count. I've had so many faces. How long have you known me? You don't know me. Not even a little bit."
That wasn't just aimed at the companions. I feel that was aimed at the Doctor themself.
(Related: the response from the fam was flat-out beautiful. Doesn't matter who she was or who she'll be. They know her now, and they love her.)
Just. Wow. Wow.
Really cool note from Twitter - disguised name was Ruth Clayton. Ruth = 'friend, companion'. Clayton = 'of the Earth'. She literally named herself 'friend of the Earth'.
"You're probably a bit confused right now."
I mean. Yeah. Confused and intrigued and what.
"Don't do points! I do points! Points are my thing!"
Jack. Jack. Smooching Graham, hitting on all the companions, getting into Shenanigans! The Lone Cyberman - I wonder if that's a totally different crisis that isn't even related to the current Gallifrey-Timeless Child one? The more important part is Jack's presence - the presence of another time traveller with a... unique relationship with the universe. The actual warning could be a red herring, but Jack showing up anywhere in the first place is a sign that something is happening with time?
Orphan 55 had a timeline that may or may not have been the 'real' one. Being only a potential future kind of doesn't work with what we know of established DW continuity, so I'm liking the 'alternate timeline' theory, maybe?
Ryan: "I liked him. Kind of cheesy."
Yaz: "But good cheesy."
Thirteen, smiling: "That's Jack."
Graham just standing there going, "He kissed me tho? ...Wasn't bad, actually."
"Is she safe?" Jack, honestly, is she ever safe?
"When she needs me... I'll be there." Oh yeah, he's so coming back later this season.
Also, Judoon, chameleon arch, the Master, Jack - getting big season 29 vibes here and that's a big thumbs up for me because that's my favourite season. We just need Martha to make an appearance now!
...hehe honestly, between Jodie's entire existence, and now, in the span of five episodes, introducing Dhawan!Master, Gat, and now Jo Martin as the first black female Doctor, and reintroducing Jack, one of the most overtly and openly queer characters on the series, the 'Doctor Who is too PC!' bunch are going to be so mad XD
"A platoon of Judoon... near the moon." / "Look at you, your platoon of Judoon near the... that lagoon..."
Man. The close-up in the very first shot of the watch. Nice tie-in.
"The Doctor never uses weapons!" "I know! Shut up! >.>"
Where do the Kasaavin come into play? Is this something they've done by integrating themselves throughout time and space? Maybe they're fraying the fabric?
My mind is blown. I can't wait for the rest of this season :D
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[Part 2 - Praxeus to The Timeless Children]
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i got distracted earlier and forgot to post but im thankful for my mutuals who have helped me time and again, even if it’s in ways you may not know. i appreciate you all so much and i am so grateful for the friends i’ve made here and the small but intimate community cultivated through tumblr.
zbfc and wch, thank you for everything. @zeyan i love you with all my heart and i’m so fucking thankful i could have funny airbnb time with you and @aeiroki grimlock hunterpunter. you make me laugh every single day and i always want the best for you both (and jack!!! and PARKER!!!)
@lokaror thank you for letting me share my love of rexxar and bears with you. we’ve shared a lot of fantastic laughs together, some very fun stuff and some very deep shit too. i treasure every one of our convos together, and your playlists too!
@reglei thankful i finally got to beat you into submission at blizzcon. youre a sweetheart and a sleepyhead. thanks for listening to me ramble late into the night. i appreciate all the times youve had my back, whether it was creepy dudes or spoilers or w/e. you shoulda killed me w gorehowl when you had the chance
I LOVE @amarysue i miss you when you work long hours but i’m always so happy when we get to play games together. i hope you can leave the mcdonalds playplace soon. also i dont get to say it much but i love talking about academic stuff with you. i know i rib you about dark leafy greens but you are very educated in a lot of amazing fields and i love when you share your knowledge with me!!! i love amary!!!!
@theabsolutevoid i know youre the void but youre a golden human being of radiant light. you are so spectacular, we are all always in amazement of your passion and creativity and constant flow of ideas, and your compassion seems boundless. i am so grateful to know such a special person and spent many late nights laughing to tears with you
@perce the dynamic duo... im thankful daygo got me into ladybug so i could hear all of your amazing takes on it as they are equally as hilarious as your wow takes. i admire your resilience, though that might be weird to say, and though i know i’m an old crone youre definitely a role model for me taking command of my own life and establishing boundaries to become the person i want to be. i’m so grateful we got to spend blizzcon together again!! and thank you for getting me the long-forgotten hippogryph. its a very important memory to me.
refugees i know i dont pop in much but i still love you all dearly. im embarrassed actually because you are all functional adults and i’m not but when i get a job and reenter society i want to be able to come back and say i’m a big kid now
thrainosh squad @irenthel @wckhamm etc thank you for letting me indulge my interests without ridicule or judgment. @fitzefitcher i dunno you changed my life SORRY there is not a less fucked up way to say that. no pressure
@sithisis & crew thank you for so many incredible hots games and wonderful memories and all of your sweetness and fun times!!! sith you have inspired and supported so much of my writing and my ideas and i am in awe that you are getting so many amazing opportunities working in games journalism!!! i know theres a lot of grunt work but at the end of the day it seems like youre really doing something you genuinely love (and are good at!!) and i’m so happy for you. you work hard and you deserve it. im love skitty w a gun
@steblynkaagain your art is such an inspiration to me, and i’m amazed by your cosplay too! i’m thankful that even across language barriers we can enjoy thraina and silly modern AUs together. i am so impressed by your intelligence and achievements. your comic where you pledge yourself to Thrall’s Horde is still so important to me, and every day i think about your mechanic garrosh..... and doctor drek’thar, and doctor thrall, and SHAMAN GARROSH....... (sob)
@captainkaprozyx and @sdei ... i am so thankful for all of your artwork and your amazing gifts. i am working on getting them framed, and your zine was amazing! you are a great team and I love your collaborations. also sdei’s birthday gift is still my discord icon. we just really love a big guy huh....... cannot express how inspiring your artwork is. the detail, the colors... it brings me to tears, i am so stunned. you are both so incredibly talented!
@omnifariousness bro i dont even know where to start. many good dog times and we can strike up the late night jawin again soon i hope. shit has been scattered and i know youve been dippin back n forth on the road but i hope the shit evens out soon for you. excited for you to see tool in feb and damn dude every DAY i think about the reading you treated me to of the 40k stuff for your reel. god man i want that VA shit to work out for you bad. your diction is impeccable and you so deserve it
@darnjam i know you guys dont read this but i love you so much and every day i’m so thankful we’re all still friends. @daygloow thank you for being like the sole source and catalyst for my personal development for like the last 3 years, im so proud of you and everything youve worked so hard to achieve and i’m so glad youre getting the recognition you deserve. thank you for always picking me up (vehicular and emotional) and for watching cartoons n playin vidya with me. god whens the next GOOD rave? i need to make you proud and actually dj so i can play banana
@bluntcrusher every day i’m like god when will king tori take the throne... im so thankful that youre in a good spot finally and that youre getting the love you deserve. and plus a sweet pucci mane. my blogs a mess but im glad youre still stickin around for it haha. always happy to see youre safe and THRIVING
@swarnpert love you dude thank you for lettin me harass you w 420 snaps. bro when you sent me those sabaton snaps i was in line for the haunted mansion at disneyland during blizzcon and it was just like... my heart was so full, it meant so much to me ALSO HOLY SHIT i love your art please NEVER STOP drawing
@nelfs i love your blog and your art and your FEELINGS like I dunno how to word it in a not-weird way. i think you are a very bright person with a good heart, and i’m thankful to know someone like that, even tangentially. it is fortifying also to see someone stand up for the things they love, whether it’s just a cartoon show or something of serious concern like animal welfare. i admire your healthy relationship to yourself and your strong integrity.
@neophyte-redglare i think about bead world garrosh every fucking day of my life. cannot thank you enough. i treasure it
@redpandalori THIS IS THE MVP RIGHT HERE. i dunno when you started sending me floods of kittums but every day i look forward to it and every single one means so much to me. i wear the kandi you handcrafted for me every single day and i show it off constantly to my friends because it’s just mindblowing. you are so sweet and thoughtful and i love sendin you snaps and it’s just incredible how the internet is. thank you for sending me rain snaps and kito & harley/ears & lilith pics all the time
@hungwy i dunno WHAT you get outta my blog but i’m thankful for the reams of sweet animal pics and interesting linguistic and anthropology posts on your blog. you’re a very positive force on my dash and you seem a wonderful person irl too!
@ubersaur im so happy we’re still mutuals after all this time lmao. you were one of the first aces id ever known so we’ll always have that solidarity and i’ll always be thankful. and i have to seriously catch up on magus bride haha. thank you for all of your love and support after all this time, i hope i offer the same to you!!
@18milliondeadplebs the rare and beautiful nexus of my two sole interests... warcraft and raving. dude just thank you for existing man LMAO i hope we can go ravin together some day
@kontextmaschine what a strange long fuckin trip it’s been dude. super surreal to have raved with you and had you come all the way down for burst but i knew i’d be remiss if youd missed it. you definitely deserved a potent taste of the 90s. thank you for the usb sticks, im still waiting on a worthy recipient for the other two. the majority of your blog is practically in hieroglyphics to me but man when the posts hit... they fuckin hit. i know you dont need me to tell you, but youve got a great talent and weirdass fuckin eye. a very very particular eye. love you man. please kiss badger for me.
@ironbull thank you for suffering in wisdom tooth hell with me. i am glad you had a good time at disney world and im hoping we can both be free of all of our tooth woes soon. thank you also for your advice and support in my personal stuff too!!
@kittensceilidh thank you for your sweet messages! every one of your hugs means a lot to me!!! it is nice to feel seen when i am in dark places.
@dimedog warcraft and foggy forests... hell yeah dude
@tim-official man sometimes it really is as simple as just laughing at the same funny shit, but youve reached out to me too and i appreciate it!!!
@peanotbotter thank you for all of the laughs and the kind words! thank you for caring about me, i care about you too!! i hope we can play hots again or wow together soon!!!
wow this got long but i love a bunch of people. there are more of you that i love and are very special to me and i apologize if i didnt get to you. i hope you all had a nice holiday, if you celebrated. thank you for believing in me
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