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vxperorchist · 3 years

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First time requesting anything sir-💀🤚🏻. Feel free to ignore this but can I request Childe, Kaeya and Albedo having a fight with their s/o (them in the wrong) and instantly looking for their s/o? Sorry if it's too much or too detailed don't feel the need to do it-Have a nice day!

HIIII THANKS FOR REQUESTING

ALSO I REMEMBER MY FIRST TIME REQUESTING AND BESTIE IT WAS AWFUL. YOU DID GREAT DON'T WORRY

I HOPE ITS NOT TO LONG OR TO SHORT

I HOPE YOU LIKE THIS

Characters: Kaeya, Albedo, and Childe

Warnings: Cursing, Arguments, Kinda angsty? Fluff towards the end

Word count: 1364

Kaeya

It’s quite rare for the two of you to get into a fight, and of course you both want to keep it that way, but with that being said you still will have your disagreements.

Kaeya had been overwhelmed with work that day, and he needed some time to get it done.

You had entered his office like you usually did, making your way over to his desk so you could hug him. You had thought nothing of it until you had latched your arms onto him. “Hey, how’s work go-” you said only to be cut off by his voice. “Not now, I have a lot of work to do. Please leave.” He moved your arms off of him and continued to look down at his desk. “Oh, I’ll come check on you later the-” “No, please just go.” He interrupted once again, yet this time louder and much angrier. You quickly left his office, not wanting to argue anymore with him. Your mind wandering all over the place, trying to think of what you could have done wrong. You walked through Mondstadt, and ended up around the outskirts of Springvale. You stayed strong, despite all of the overwhelming emotions flooding over you. Did I do something wrong? Enter at the wrong time? Am I overthinking? Once you had cleared your mind, and were ready to head back to Mondstadt, you saw a blue figure in the distance, and coincidentally it was your favorite blue-haired male. He rushed up to you, as you took a few steps back. Every emotion had left his face when you stepped back. He knew he messed up, and wanted to do nothing but hug you. “I’m so sorry… I was overwhelmed with work, and I lashed out on you…” He stared at your figure, and reached his hand out. “Forgive me?” You smiled, and jumped onto him. Burying your face into his neck. It was a comfortable silence surrounding the two of you, and he wished that this moment could last forever.

Childe

When dating the 11th Fatui Harbinger, you have to deal with his personality. You of course knew that and have already learned to deal with it.

You two like to smart-mouth each other quite a lot (BEAT HIS ASS), but it’s not common for an actual argument to break out.

It was a cloudy day, and you had just finished work. Childe was negotiating with a few subordinates of his per usual. As you watched from a distance, you could sense the tension in the air. It seemed as if something had gone wrong. You frowned at the thought, but once you saw he was walking away from the other Fatui members, you approached him. “Hey Tar! Everything alright?” You said happily, trying to lighten the mood. He sighed, and tried to console his anger. You could tell something was up, but really hoped it was something you both could talk about and forget. “No, it’s fine. Damn subordinates…” He scoffed, and walked away. “Are you sure, do you wanna talk about it?” “I said I'm fine.” he hollered back. You weren't used to this kind of yelling, and honestly it scared you a little bit. You shook the thought out of your head and walked away. I’ll head over to the harbour, it’s always a great time there. You thought while making your way to the Harbour. Once you had arrived, you had met up with a few of your friends. You had nearly forgotten what happened earlier. Later on in the day you were talking with your friends while walking around the city. Once the sun had started to set you decided to go sit at one of your favorite locations. It had a beautiful view of Liyue and the Ocean. It was quiet, besides the calming background noise of the harbour. You heard footsteps, and were ready to draw your weapon, until you heard a familiar voice. “You know, you should have already had me in range of your weapon.” Childe joked, as he hugged you from behind. “I was looking for you everywhere, but your mask gave you away.” He had given you a mask much like his when you had first started dating, to let everyone know who you were in a relationship with. “I also wanted to apologise for earlier, my subordinates had failed a simple mission and I let it out on you.” You smiled, looking into his eyes as he turned his head quickly. “It’s no big deal dumbass, now can we go back home? I’m tired.” You replied while hugging his waist. “Of course.” He grinned while kissing the top of your head.

Albedo

With Albedo, arguments are extremely rare, but not impossible to have.

You were both in Dragonspine, working on a certain project that was quite harder than most others.

You were both doing fine, it was a long tedious project, but nothing the dream team couldn't handle. Although, when you got to the part where you had to deal with chemicals… things got rough.

“Y/n please pass me that.” He said while looking at the bottle to your left. “Oh, of cou- wait, you don’t need that, you need this one.” You said while handing him a different bottle. “No, I do indeed need the one right there.” He replied, handing the bottle back over to you. “Albedo, I'm telling you, it’s this one.” You said, not wanting to sound rude, but also you knew what you needed to do. He got up from the table and walked over and took the bottle himself. You sighed and watched as he poured the chemicals into the bigger bottle. Of course he didn't get the reaction he was looking for. He sighed and put the bottles of chemicals back on the table. “I tried to tell-” “It doesn't matter, you should go for a bit. I’ll be redoing this.” You really wanted to help him, yet didn't want to argue. You decided to do what you thought was right by leaving. It was early, so you could take some time off and explore some of the mountain. You decided on ascending up the mountain, not too far, but enough to get a nice view. Knowing there was another camp quite close, you decided to go up to that camp. “Hey y/n! What are you doing here?” One of your friends from a Dragonspine research group asked. “Thought I would take a walk and come check on you!” Your friend smiled, and showed you what they had been working on. You both decided to take another small walk to the area they were doing research at. You had looked at the setting sun and realized it was time to get back to your own research. “Hey y/n hold on! I heard there is a bad blizzard coming our way and we should postpone all research until it has passed. Why don’t you come stay at our camp for the night?” Your friend said, quite concerned for your safety. You happily accepted the offer and stayed the night. Once morning came, you awoke to the research group excitedly walking around in the fresh snow due to the blizzard earlier. Everyone had noticed a figure ascending up the mountain towards the research camp. “Y/n?” a voice called, while still struggling uphill in the fresh snow. “Albedo? What are you doing here?” You ran to him, and hugged him tightly. “You’re alright…” He whispered while clinging onto you. “Of course I am, are you alright?” He nodded, still not letting go of you. “Did that blizzard get to-” “I’m sorry… I acted irrationally.” He interrupted. “Oh Albedo…” You responded while rubbing his back. “HEY! ARE Y'ALL ALRIGHT? OR DID YOU FREEZE?” A member from the research team yelled. “No! We’re alright, thank you all for everything!” You hollered back. “Anytime!” the research team waved, as you descended down the mountain. “So… did you ever finish that project…?” You asked, looking at him. He shook his head awkwardly and continued to walk. “I may have if I wasn't busy panicking about your well being.”

#childe x reader #kaeya alberich #albedo x reader #childe #gensin impact

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band--psycho · 3 years

Text

Jax Teller x Reader-Valentines Day Drama

(Credit to the gif owner)

Y/ns POV

He told me what time he’d be back and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t keeping a sharp eye on the clock as it counted down, waiting for Jax’s arrival home. I had everything planned out, a nice romantic dinner which was still cooking away in the oven, followed by his favourite dessert which I’d already made during the day. Then we’d probably have a nice relaxing bath or a quick shower together (depending on how his day with the club had been) and then we’d spend the rest of the evening in bed, celebrating the day in the most perfect way possible. Making love in every way we could, rough and dirty, slow and passionate...all of it. Granted I knew I probably wouldn’t be able to walk tomorrow but that was a price I was more than willing to pay. I was just looking forward to spending the evening with him, I couldn’t remember the last time we’d spent time like this together; he was so busy with the club we rarely ever got to spend proper time together. I understood it all, the club needed him..but I just missed him and I knew that tonight would be the perfect day for us to reconnect.

The candles were lit, the dinner was plated and set at the table and I watched with anticipation as the clock struck 6pm. I couldn’t help the small frown that came on my face when I didn’t hear the familiar sound of Jaxs’ bike, but I just told myself that he was running a little bit late.

The hours passed by, painfully slowly. I’d tried calling him but his phone just kept going straight to voicemail. I’d practically drank half of the bottle of whiskey I’d brought for us to share, blown the candles out, thrown the dinner away and just sat in the darkness as I waited for him. By the time I heard the familiar hum I’d been dying to hear all evening four and a half hours had passed and in all honesty, I wasn’t even sure I wanted to see Jax right now.

“Darlin?” I heard him ask, but I didn’t turn round to face him, I just stared at the wall, trying to stop the tears from falling from my eyes as well as trying to stop myself from letting all of the anger that was boiling in my veins out. But I was jogged from my thoughts when I felt Jaxs hands on my shoulder, lightly gripping it causing my attention to focus back on him as he knelt infront of me.

“Darlin’ I am so sorry I was late,” he apologises, the sincerity is in his voice, but I couldn’t help the scoff that slipped past my lips as I did so. Flashbacks of all the missed, cancelled or postponed dates racing through my head, making me grip tighten on the glass I was holding.

“Y/n/n..say something,”

“What do you want me to say Jax?” I snapped, the pent up anger flooding out into a harsh tone. I saw his eyes raise in shock; in all the time I’d known him, I’d never spoken to him like this but at this point I didn’t even care. I was mad. And in all honesty, I was done hiding it.

“I spent all day waiting for you to come home, I had a whole evening planned and you couldn’t even call to tell me you were going to be late!” The anger in my voice did not falter once as I slid the glass onto the table before my grip shattered it.

“Y/n/n...some shit came up with the club-”

“Some shit always comes up with the club, Jax!” I yelled back, interrupting him.

“It was important Y/n/n/! I couldn’t just up and leave! I needed to fix the shit that was going on!” Jax answered back, the anger in his voice growing as his eyes burned into me.

“And what about fixing shit between us, Jax?” I asked harshly, running a hand through my hair.

“Y/n-” he attempted, in a softer voice as he slowly made his way towards me.

“Your top priority is always the club,” I spat. I knew it wasn’t rational. I knew Jax was desperately trying to diffuse the situation but I couldn’t see past the red mist that had descended.

“Because they’re my family!” He retorted back, the fire in his eyes growing harsher and harsher.

“So what am I, to you Jax? Some whore who’ll give you comfort when you need it?” The words left my mouth before I’d even fully registered what I’d said. The fire in Jaxs’ vanished as soon as he heard those words. He attempted to open his mouth, more than likely to apologise..but I was too angry to hear any of it and before he could say anything else I made my way towards the door, swinging it open.

“Where are you going?” Jax asked, though he didn't move from where he previously was. It was like he was frozen in place.

“For a damn walk,” I replied, slamming the door behind me as I left the house.

Third Person POV

Jax knew better than to follow her when she was in a mood like this, he also knew that there was nothing he could say that could make up for how he’d been acting lately nor what he’d said to her and how he said it. He knew what she was talking about, he’d felt the distance that she was talking about and he hated it just as much as she did. He missed her but he couldn’t just spend fleeting moments with her, it only made him miss her more and then he couldn’t focus on the task at hand. The club was in some deep shit and he didn’t want to involve her with it. He stupidly thought that putting some distance between them would make things easier...that he’d be able to come home and forget all about the issues with the club but in doing so he avoided looking at the problem that was causing them as a couple. He brushed off the way her smile would slightly falter when he’d cancel a date or the disappointment in her voice when he rearranged; he constantly promised himself that he’d make it up to her when everything with the club was sorted but it just kept on getting worse and soon enough there was no ‘right time’ to tell her all about it.

“So what am I to you, Jax? Some whore who’ll give you comfort when you need it?” Those words echoed round and round in his head. He hated it. Hated the fact that she felt this way. Growing up with her, he’d seen all the shit boyfriends she’d had and the one thing they all had in common was treating her like shit. When he started feeling more than friendship towards her, he made a promise, not only to himself but to her too that he would always treat her how she deserved to be treated like a princess. Sliding down the wall in the room he realised he hadn’t been doing a lot of that lately, instead he’d been doing the very thing he promised that he wouldn’t do. He pulled a cigarette out of the packet , letting out a deep sigh as he lit it. The tears brimming in his eyes as the cigarette connected with his lips; thoughts about him and Y/n/n running through his head.

~~~~~~~~

Y/n had intended to go for a long walk to clear her head, but she’d only taken a few steps away from the house when a wave of regret and sadness washed over her. She hated fighting with Jax, hated how angry she’d got so angry at him and how she let the alcohol she’d drunk take over her mouth revealing all of the thoughts she’d only ever kept to herself. Y/n knew she’d been harsh towards him and out of order; she knew what he and the club were like before she agreed to date him so none of this should’ve been a surprise to her. And maybe it wasn’t necessarily a surprise to her, maybe what was a surprise to her was how much she missed him while he was away.

Y/n had no idea how much time had passed, but knew that sooner or later she would have to go inside and face Jax. She tried to work out what she could say to him as an apology but nothing she could think of made up for how she treated him, nevertheless, the air was growing colder so she decided to bite the bullet so to say. She took a deep breath attempting to calm herself before pushing the door open and re-entering the house.

~~~~~~~~

Y/ns POV

The room was bathed in a sea of darkness, had it not been for the dim light of Jaxs’ cigarette I wouldn’t have known where he was. Tentatively I approached him, I felt a pang of guilt in my heart as I saw his tear stained cheeks. Slowly, I slid down the wall so I was sitting next to him, not knowing what to say to him. For a while we sat in silence until Jax grabbed his ashtray, putting out his cigarette.

“I’m sorry,” I whispered, turning to him and slowly wiping away the tears that lingered on his cheeks. Instinctively he raised his hand to mine, placing a soft kiss on my palm before whispering “I’m sorry,” back to me.

“I shouldn’t have said what I did…” I admitted, trying to hold back the sob that was building in my throat.

“You said how you felt, darlin’,” he reassured, pulling me closer to him, he placed a light kiss on the top of my head before continuing to say, “you’re always gonna be my family, Y/n, I love you, more than I’ve ever loved anyone else and I’m so sorry I haven’t made you feel like that.” before I could respond he lightly hooked his finger under my chin, forcing me to look up at him; his eyes lingered on mine for a moment, glancing down at my lips momentarily before tucking a loose strand of hair behind my ear. And then he placed his soft lips on mine. This kiss wasn’t fast or rough like a lot of our kisses had been recently. Instead, it was slow and passionate, like we were exploring every fibre of each other's kiss. Just like the first time we kissed.

“I can’t change the past, darlin’, but I promise you, I’m gonna do my best to remind you every single day how much I love you,” as he said those words he slowly rose to his feet, I did the same but before I could fully stand up I felt Jaxs’ arms wrap around my body picking me up bridal style as he carried me off to our bedroom, muttering sweet nothings in my ear and after every whisper he’d place a soft and delicate kiss on my forehead.

If you want a part 2 let me know?🤷🏼‍♀️

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masterjedilenawrites · 3 years

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Blueberries and Cowboys: Chapter 2

A choose-your-own-adventure style fic. First, 2 platonic chapters for set-up/build-up. And then, the story will split into 2 paths depending on your romantic pairing preference: You and Thrawn, or You and Eli.

Chapter Masterlist

Chapter 2: The Plan

Pairing: None...yet...

Chapter Warnings: Mentions of bullying

Length: 2k

AO3 Link (In case you like it better over there, it’s okay, no judgement)

The rest of the week saw the three of you using every bit of free time outside your classes and studies to gather information for Thrawn to build a solid plan.

Eli tailed his pesky classmate Arden everywhere, even skipping a class one day to break into his dorm, trying to learn anything about the guy that could be useful to get him involved in the plot. Thrawn analyzed the simulation software and protocols that would be used to administer the tests, mapping out every possible way Commander Burdick could hijack it. And you were the one spying on the Burdick himself. Since the commander didn't seem too interested in your grades, you were able to shadow him without suspicion, and had been able to slip a bug into his offices to eavesdrop on any potential conversations about his plans for sabotage.

Your classmates and the staff were none the wiser. That was the advantage of being social outcasts. Half of them avoided you all like the plague, and the other half already thought you were weird people doing weird things. So it wasn't long before you'd all gotten enough intel to work with.

It was late in the evening at the end of the week. You found yourself in Thrawn and Eli's shared dorm, which looked identical to your own in the opposite wing, because the Empire couldn't bother with things like individuality or comfort. Eli sat on the edge of his top bunk, his legs swinging casually, and his coat unbuttoned to reveal a wrinkled undershirt you knew he hadn't bothered to wash all week. Thrawn paced about in the middle of the room, his long strides only allowing him about four good steps before he had to turn around. He still had his uniform on, boots and badges and all.

You leaned against the railing of the bed, watching Thrawn as he went back and forth. Sometimes he sat still when he was scheming, with his fingers steepled and his gaze seemingly reaching into some unknown dimension beyond your comprehension. That usually happened when he was running through variables that didn't concern you, at least from his perspective. You and Eli had accepted long ago there would always be parts of his plans he would never share with you. He was kind of a control freak like that.

But tonight, he seemed to be more welcoming of collaboration, hence his steady rhythm of pacing in front of you.

"Only one variable remains, as I see it," he was saying. "We understand how the commander will manipulate the system to cause a redundancy in the simulation, thus rendering the test impossible to finish successfully."

You and Eli shared a glance; the only person who truly understood how that was going to happen was Thrawn. He'd tried explaining numerous times but when it came to codes and tech, the two of you weren't able to fully keep up.

"We also know through your investigating," Thrawn motioned to you with what you thought was an impressed look, causing you to feel a little pride, "that the commander plans to only sabotage my test, believing it will be too suspicious if Eli also fails. He will also manipulate his false code to originate from the computer of his former lover Eva Carroway, who currently works in HR. So if an investigation does ensue, it will be traced to her and not him."

You and Eli chuckled under your breaths. It had been a little amusing when you'd discovered Commander Burdick was using this plan to not only undermine Thrawn, but also get revenge on his ex-girlfriend. But even more hilarious was how awkward Thrawn treated the subject. He had been quite perplexed to learn people could be so vindictive after a break-up. And any time he explained that detail of the plan, like he was doing now, he hesitated over his word choice. You couldn't tell if he only pretended to be confused about romantic relations, or if that was truly an area he found himself lost in.

If Thrawn noticed your snickering, he didn't respond to it, only continued to recap the plan. "We have also determined how we will expose the altered code naturally, so it does not cast suspicion on us... What was the word you used?"

"Backfire," said Eli.

"Yes. It would not due to have anyone suspect that we altered the test ourselves, or to have our concerns disregarded altogether. Thus, arranging for the maintenance crew to get a mild case of food poisoning so their performance checks are postponed to occur right before the tests will take care of that variable. At the least, they will fix the altered code and I will take the test as normal. At the most, they will report it and the commander faces expulsion."

"So..." said Eli through a yawn as he stretched. "What's left to work out, then?"

Now it was time for you and Thrawn to share a look.

"Were you not interested in involving your classmate, Arden Fey?" asked Thrawn in his soft, contemplative voice.

Eli shrugged. "Yeah. But Burdick's already got his scapegoat, his ex. So it'll be easier to keep him out of it. Whatever."

You could tell he was trying to be nonchalant. But just this morning, he had spent the entire walk between classes ranting about some new insults Arden had come up with, and how badly he wanted to show the guy up once and for all. You knew your friend wasn't feeling "whatever" about it.

"It's not a matter of ease or difficulty," Thrawn stated plainly. He had stopped pacing and was standing with hands behind his back, highlighting the broadness of his shoulders and the height of his stance. His presence seemed to fill up the whole room, and not for the first time, you were glad to be his friend and not his enemy.

"Yeah," you added in encouragement. "We just have to get creative. Find a way to make Arden a more appealing scapegoat than Burdick's ex. In fact...."

You trailed off as an idea occurred to you. You darted out of the room, surely leaving your two friends perplexed, but you would only be a second. You sprinted down the corridor toward the lifts, where a bulletin hung against the wall with fliers and pamphlets. One notice was a bit larger than the others, a promotion of an upcoming gala event to celebrate the Academy's anniversary. You ripped it off and went racing back to the boys' dorm room.

Eli had come down from the bunk and held a concerned look, probably prepared to follow you if you hadn't returned so quickly. Thrawn was still standing composed, but there was a curiosity in his eyes that made you smile.

You held up the poster in front of your chest. "What do you think the likelihood is of us playing successful matchmakers this week?"

Thrawn understood your idea almost immediately, looking down on you with a pleased smirk. It made you flush a little, to know the Chiss was impressed. You rarely had a chance to contribute good ideas when his mind worked so much faster than yours.

Eli caught on next, and he started to grin, the happiest you'd seen him in a while. His smile was infectious and you grinned back. Happy looked good on him.

"We know Eva's not shy with younger guys," you explained. "Before Burdick, she was fooling around with some intern in the med bay."

"And Arden's vain enough," added Eli. "If he thinks anyone's interested, he'll go for 'em."

"So we get him to ask her to the gala as his date...." you said.

"Burdick sees the two of them together...." said Eli.

"And realizes he can get back at his lover in another way, by pinning the sabotage on another student...." joined Thrawn.

The three of you stood together, proud and satisfied that yet another plan had finally worked out. It was almost worth the stressful studying and petty bullying and all the other unpleasant things you had to endure at this god-forsaken school, just to have fun moments like this with trusted friends.

"We should attend this gala as well," Thrawn said eventually, holding out a hand for the poster. He inspected it thoughtfully. "It is only a few days before the tests, so I hadn't planned to pay it any mind. But now...."

"Yeah, we should make sure Burdick's as jealous as we want 'im," nodded Eli.

You were secretly pleased. The plan was already a win-win, but now you would be able to go to the event yourself, too. You hadn't mentioned your desire to go to either of them before, figuring they weren't interested and not wanting to sound silly if you suggested it. But you did love dancing, and it was so very rare you got a chance to wear something other than your Imperial uniform.

"It's a dance," you noted, in case they couldn't tell by the details on the poster. "We'll need to go in pairs."

"I suppose it would make the most sense for you and Eli to go together," said Thrawn quietly.

You looked between the two, realizing both of them were flushed slightly. Eli's cheeks were dotted with pink, standing out amongst his dark brown features, while Thrawn had more of a purple tint to his face now, a color you'd never seen there before. You could feel yourself growing warm and uncomfortable as well. It was only a dance... only a way for you to enact a much more important plan... but it was the first time your trio had had to engage in anything other than platonic friendship. The balance of your group seemed to be shifting ever so slightly in this moment, and you had no way of knowing if it was for good or ill.

You cleared your throat, pushing away any feelings that might have been brewing in your chest, and instead calling focus back to the mission at hand.

"Actually, I think I'd better go with Thrawn. Whoever doesn't go with me would have to find their own date, and no offense Thrawn, but I think Eli has the better chance of asking someone else."

You hoped they hadn't noticed how hollow your voice sounded, how hard you were trying to keep yourself emotionless.

Eli was pinker than ever. "Uh, I highly doubt that..."

"You're not completely hated around here, you know," you said quickly. "Definitely not with the girls. You're not bad looking, you can be charming if you try, and you're... you know, human." You glanced at Thrawn and added again quietly, "No offense."

Thrawn shook his head. His color and demeanor had already slipped back into his usual neutral self. "No, I agree. Those are the dynamics of our peers and we must work with it. I will take you to the gala, Eli will find his own date, and all three of us will push Arden and Eva together as well. It's a good plan."

You all nodded in agreement. But there was a knot in your stomach, a nervousness you didn't quite understand. You cared very much for both Thrawn and Eli. They were your best friends, your only friends. As a group, you were bonded by your ostracism, protecting and supporting each other on your journey out of this hell-hole.

And separately, you had something special with each, too. You and Eli came from similar backgrounds, and had the same need to disconnect from your surroundings and just have a bit of fun every once in a while. The two of you had spent many late nights together, either hopping between bars, exploring the city, making each other laugh uncontrollably, or quietly sharing the honest thoughts you both buried far too deeply inside. Some nights you'd done all of the above, and returned to your dorm feeling both exhausted and renewed.

But Eli didn't always appreciate the finer things in life, and that's where you connected with Thrawn. He wasn't necessarily an optimist, but he had this way of noticing the beauty that existed everywhere around you, even in the most simple or mundane of moments. Everything had the potential to be interesting. His calm but strong presence had kept you grounded and sane throughout your studies here so far. Sometimes you would talk, other times you would simply be in the same space. And either way, you felt better about life.

You didn't exactly want your relationship with them to change. But you couldn't help but feel this gala would do just that....

Next Chapter: The Preparation >

Blueberry Path | Thrawn x reader

Cowboy Path | Eli x reader

#star wars #thrawn #eli vanto #thrawn x reader #eli vanto x reader #choose your own adventure #friendship #romance #friends to lovers #mitth'raw'nuruodo

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kim-bobbae · 4 years

Text

54. “I made reservations.”

I miss him so much and I hope he’s resting up, I just want to take care of him and be his comfort person TT

“To be really honest, I have no idea what he’s busy with until I see a recording or photoshoot of his on my schedule, and then I’m summoned to do his hair and makeup,” You laughed. “At this point I think it’s a relief he renewed his contract with AOMG instead of signing with H1GHR, don’t you think?”

“I’m right, he really is the dad that’s never home,” Wonjae chuckled, tugging lower on his beanie.

You were in the car on the way back to the AOMG headquarters after Wonjae’s photoshoot where Pumkin had dropped by in support since it was his first ever solo shoot for W magazine when the topic of Jay came about as you guys discussed the responses received from the interview they had done that was uploaded just a few days ago. With how busy Jay had been and how rare it was to see him around at the AOMG headquarters, their questions on what he had been up to very naturally fell on you because who else would know better if not for his girlfriend, right?

Wrong. You had absolutely no idea either.

Yes, there was the H1GHR compilation – you knew that much – but so did everyone else. The fact that you didn’t know much more than that surprised them, to say the least.

“Do you want me to nag at him a little and drop him a hint or two? I could do that,” Pumkin offered.

“Oh please no, I don’t think he’ll be too pleased if he finds out I’m whining about him to you guys behind his back.”

“Not exactly, we’re the ones asking you about him,” Wonjae rebutted.

“Yeah, when was the last time you guys went on a date?” Pumkin asked. “Don’t count the ones where you guys order delivery from the office or his studio, those aren’t counted.”

“Why not? Those are dates…”

“I see where the problem lies now,” Wonjae snickered.

“C’mon, you guys are making this a bigger deal than it actually is,” You remarked. “We’ve been dating for years now, we’re past that.”

A few days passed since then with nothing really out of the ordinary except for a dinner with your friends that you’ve managed to fit into your schedule after clearing an important deadline. With a couple of music releases coming up, you were attending meetings with different artists, talking to them about their ideas and concepts, proposing hairstyles, make up and clothing that would be suitable for their music videos and teaser images.

While the job did sound manageable, the very act of browsing endless collections of the latest fashion releases was extremely time consuming, and squeezing in a short conversation or two with Jay via text message was, in fact, pretty much the norm these days with the both of you being so busy. Not that you minded – you just got used to it.

And so did he.

You understood though, really. You understood that he was a busy man and while you were important to him, he simply could not afford to put you in the center of his world. But he tried, and he did all he could to show you that. Yet, with that workaholic nature of his and all the people he had to put on for, work would always be his priority.

It was just hard facing up to it last week when you tried your luck at getting some affection by cuddling up to him while he was reviewing some tracks during the ten minute window that the both of you were left alone in the studio – you couldn’t help it, it’s been a whole month (!!!) – only to earn a ‘I’m working, babe’ in a tone you don’t usually appreciate. He apologized, of course, realizing that he had hurt your feelings from the way you retreated quietly to another room, but it did enough to keep you from attempting it again for the remainder of the week.

“Dinner tonight?”

A message notification flashed across your screen. It was Jay.

You didn’t think much of it though and readily agreed to it. For a split second, you wondered if Pumkin had a part to play in this and the smirk on his face as the receptionist walked in to the office towards you with a bouquet of roses in hand only confirmed your suspicions.

“Looks like someone sent you flowers,” She said, handing it to you.

Now Jay wasn’t really one who’d be into these flashy, romantic gestures, especially in front of his employees, and the number of heads that turned towards your direction with knowing smiles on their faces made you understand exactly why.

Take a longer lunch break to get ready if you need to, I’ll be at the office at 7pm to pick you up.

You raised a brow at the formalities as you read the message on the card. Having been together for years, being on the receiving end of this somewhat grand gesture all of a sudden needed some getting use to again but with everyone’s attention on you and the extremely elaborate bouquet, you quickly set is aside, an embarrassed smile the best you could muster in response to their reactions before you got back to work.

Consumed by your pile of work, you had completely lost track of time since then but it wasn’t hard to tell that it was already 7pm from the way your colleagues peeped curiously from behind their desk dividers, stifling their excited giggles and from their reaction you could already guess that Jay was here. It wasn’t every day that they could catch a glimpse of their boss’s love life, after all.

“Ready to go?” He asked, and what ensued was a moment of confusion the second you turned around to face him.

He was all cleaned up in a black tee shirt and dress pants, hair styled back and you were pretty sure those were some new shoes from his two hundred deep sneaker collection while there you were, in a pair of skinny jeans and oversized sweater and it was obvious that you guys weren’t dressed for the same occasion.

You hesitated, “…last minute schedule to attend to?”

“No…I’m taking you for dinner?” He mused, gesturing to the flowers. “I made reservations.”

“Yeah but…you didn’t tell me that I had to get dressed up,” You replied sheepishly.

“I did,” He laughed. “You just didn’t take me seriously.”

“You said ‘if you need to’,” You argued in a hush whisper. “Plus, the last time you picked me up we had tacos at the diner just down the street.”

For a while he stared at you, and so did everyone else and in all honesty, it was getting slightly embarrassing by now. Thankfully, Jay caught on your discomfort from the way you played with your fingers and bit on your lips as you waited for his reply.

“It’s okay, we’ll sort this out,” He reassured in a soft voice, grabbing the bouquet in one hand and yours in the other. “Let’s go.”

“Where are we going…?” You asked once the both of you were in the car.

The fact that one of his managers wasn’t driving you guys and that he was instead driving his Bentley for the first time in ages did explain something about what he had planned but for now, everything about this made you nervous. This was so unlike him – excluding the first year of your relationship, that is.

“We’re going to your favorite Italian restaurant,” He explained. “But I guess we should drop by your place to get you dressed up first, huh?”

“Sorry about that,” You murmured, and he couldn’t help but titter at the way you stared down at your outfit with a sigh.

You wasted no time and tossed your bag aside upon reaching home, making a beeline towards your wardrobe and immediately started sieving through your dresses. Despite the rough start, you had to admit that this was rather exciting. Heck, you couldn’t even remember the last time the both of you had a proper date night and the fact that he had taken the time to plan this amidst his schedule? Damn you were about to dress the hell up.

You hastily put on the dress that you had picked out, a fairly new one from the few that you had saved up for rare occasions like these, then scurried to the living room where Jay was waiting.

However, the sight of Jay burying his face in his hands looking absolutely worn had you somewhat stopping in your tracks.

He was seated on the couch, leaning forward with his elbows resting on his lap as he squinted at his cracked phone screen. His brows furrowed as he tapped away at what sounded like a new message notification, then brought his phone up to his ears as he listened to what probably was a demo of one of the tracks off the album. Sure, he was dressed up, absolutely stunning, but how stressed he looked was definitely not a good look on him and at this point you weren’t sure how you’d feel about dinner if his mind was going to be miles away, back in his studio.

“Wow,” He beamed upon noticing you then set his phone aside as he stood up. “You look beautiful.”

“I could say the same for you, too.”

“You okay?” He asked, cocking his head upon noticing that you seemed to be distracted in thought.

“Yeah, of course.”

“Come here, let me help you with that,” He smiled, noticing that the back of your dress was unzipped.

But as he placed his hand on the zipper, you reached around to tug on his fingers, then turned around to face him.

“What’s wrong?”

“Why don’t…we just have dinner at home today?” You suggested, observing his reaction carefully.

“Why the sudden change of mind...?”

“I don’t know,” You sighed. “I mean, you seem really caught up with work, and I love that you took the time to plan a date, but I’m not sure if I can sit through that pretending that I am not seeing for myself how exhausted you are.”

“No, no it’s fine,” He insisted. “I’m taking the night off to spend it with you.”

The both of you glanced at his phone as it beeped again and then back at each other, and you could almost tell how he was already itching to respond to it.

“I’ll cook us dinner, and we can postpone this date until after the album is released,” You told him.

He looked at you, not quite sure if he was allowed to give in to you, especially after the little episode in his studio last week that had also been due to his work.

“I’m not mad, I promise,” You giggled, reading him like a book. “Let’s stay in tonight.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, go get your MacBook from the car and carry on with your work while I cook but all I ask for though...” You started. “Is for your undivided attention after that. I’ll cook a stew if it gives you more time.”

He exhaled deeply, taking a step towards you and pulled you in for a long embrace, “How do you always manage to make me feel better even though I’m the one who screwed up?”

“You didn’t screw up,” You said, wrapping your arms around his broad frame. “You tried, and I appreciate that.”

“That makes me feel worse...” He replied, cupping your face and stroking your left cheek with his thumb.

You leaned into his touch, smiling, “It’s no big deal, this is just one of your busy phases. Once the album’s released, I’ll have my boyfriend back. Easy.”

“I’ll make up for it, alright? I promise,” He said, then leaned in to kiss you sweetly.

“Seems like the only way to get kisses nowadays is to let you work, huh?” You taunted.

“Baby…” He whined, the littlest pout creeping to his lips. “Let’s not go back there.”

“I was kidding,” You sniggered. “Now give me another one to shut me up.”

#Jay Park #park jaebum #park jaebeom #jay park scenarios #jay park drabbles #AOMG #aomg scenarios #aomg reactions #khh #khh scenarios #khh imagines #khh reactions #100 ways to say i love you

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dear--charlie · 3 years

Text

Dear Charlie,

every time I remember you, I regret not writing to you more often. So, here I am again. There are so many things on my mind ... but as I am typing, I know one thing I can start with, or more like dedicate this whole letter to. I think it's a good time to write everything down here and now – to you. It’s personal, I hope no one I know ever find this, the chances are zero, but even if, it doesn’t matter anyways. So, it will be a long letter, you’re warned!

It started in fall, one and a half years ago, when I was at a friends place. She had invited some friends over to hang out in the evening. Another friend of a friend was also coming, he wasn’t there yet and I didn’t know him, just his name from stories. So we were sitting in the room, playing something as he also arrives. The moment he entered the room, I knew. Normally I don’t „sense“ the energy someone brings or something like that, but in this moment, I just felt I would like him. I felt we would get along. And I wasn’t wrong.

We all continued to play and chat, I didn’t talk to him directly that evening, just within the group. One time someone said something and he responded, the answer he gave, the words he chose and how he pronounced them were exactly what I was thinking and how I would’ve responded myself. There is this quote I read some months ago, it’s about how with so many people on this planet, it’s no coincidence that others are thinking the same, but it’s still a fucking wonder to meet someone who says what you are thinking. But I didn’t know this quote back then, I just sat there and felt it’s immensity. The next really weird thing, well, one of the thirst things I noticed probably, he looked and spoke just like him. With him I mean the one (and to this day still the only) person I was „lovestroke“ for. Really, if you could see them both, you wouldn’t believe it either. With the difference, that he was not only cuter, but also the fact that he was in that room and friends with my friends, what meant that we two might actually have things in common. Kind of unreal! For a moment I also thought: How come y’all never introduced us? Isn’t it obvious we are alike, or might be? How could we know our friends for years but our paths never crossed? Of course everyone only has their lives on mind, but this just crossed my mind in an egocentric flash. Well on this evening, we all didn’t stay long. When I walked home I checked to find his social media, but his account was private and I didn’t send a request. Shortly after when I came home I got a notification and saw that he followed me.

After that night – nothing really happened. Not nothing, we sometimes texted a bit. We skipped smalltalk, just talked about music and stuff, but like I said, not much. Once he told some personal things. Nothing more. There were a lot of other things going on in my life and it just got less.

Many weeks later when I hung out with two of the friends who also know him, they mentioned his name, then looked meaningful at each other. When I looked confused, one friend told me the two of them hooked up, but it was clear she wasn’t positive about it or him. She didn’t elaborate and I didn’t ask because I didn’t want to come across interested.

Let’s fast forward several months. It was summer and our mutual friend asked me if I’d be down to go swimming the next day. I said yes and got to hers in the morning and she suddenly said we’ll drive to his and pick him up because he’ll be coming as well. I literally went „!“ inside. So we got there and picked him up. Everything was normal, we met other friends and went swimming. Before that I wasn’t sure how it will be, if I’d still get this feeling, or do I just like him friendship-wise? But this afternoon let no doubt. It was a crush. We talked a bit and also I recognised that he looked at me sometimes. I was sure I wasn’t just imagining.

A month later a big group of friends went on holidays together for a week, including me and him. One night when just the two of us were outside and talking I regretted everything later in bed because I thought I messed it up by not talking much and when saying the wrong things and so on. But then, one night, he slept in my room and we finally hooked up. Also the next day in the bathroom. On our way home we also cuddled in the car and when we said goodbye we said we’ll see each other. Usually, after a week with many people I’d want to chill, but I immediately had the urge to see him again the moment I sat down on my bed. We texted and set up a date a few days later. I couldn’t wait.

We met and went on a hill to watch the sunset. We made out and walked around. It never felt so right for me to hold someones hand publicly. I also told him I would leave for a while, in a month. Before we said goodbye, we talked. I was kind of an idiot because I overshared, and lowkey told him I like him, which I regretted later. When I walked home that night I remember smiling like a dumbass. When I thought about him, I had to smile. Never had I thought that this can be true, that you just have to smile and can’t fight it. So weird. Felt like I was micro dosing molly for a week straight.

Anyways. Then the trouble began. Nothing big in the beginning, but it was very hard to set up dates with him in general and when we were about to meet again he cancelled right before. It wasn’t like when you make plans with someone and they then can’t make it and you’re fine with it, because I was actually sad about it. Also it felt more like it was due to his mismanaged time and that it wasn’t as much as a priority for him. When I saw him in person I felt like he reciprocated everything, which I also never experienced like this. So I was confused. Then I straight up texted if he wants to see me again, or not really? Something that I would have never done that quickly anytime before, but I didn’t want to get my hopes up and was running out of time before I was leaving. He replied that I got it wrong, he really wants to see me again.

And we saw each other again. I went to his place. There was a bit of a fog over it in the beginning, but i eventually passed and we hooked up. I slept there. The next day, he brought me to the train. I think we even kissed as goodbye. He said he would like to do this again, I replied I’d love to. This was the last time I saw him for about a year.

I texted the next days for new plans, nothing came out of it. So I decided to wait for him to ask the next time. I waited 7 days. I almost went mad. It was his birthday in between and I decided not to text him, would’ve been weird. I texted a friend, who's also friends with him and asked if I could meet her. We met and I told her pretty much the whole story. She listened the whole time and asked things in between. Then she said she knows the reason he didn’t reach out. He has another girl and is really in love. I started crying in the middle of the street.

He would have never told me, called, texted or just anything. I was hurt by that. My friend said she would talk to him and hint that he should tell me. And he actually texted me a few days later if I would want to meet „to talk“. I agreed. When he finally responded he postponed the meet up again. I couldn't wait another several days for a conversation that he might reschedule again. It was clearly not important to him at all. I said we should just drop it. That’s was it. No final talk.

Months later, when I was back in town, I saw him on Bumble. I asked my friend about it, but she said it’s weird since she still has his girlfriend. Then I see him on Tinder with an up to date profile. In my mind-delusion I assumed they might actually not date anymore and my friend just doesn’t know yet. Then I saw him again for the first time since everything at a party. He talked to me normally, like nothing happened. Some days later I ask friends why he is on Tinder when he still has a girlfriend. For some reason a part of me expected to hear „oh yeah they broke up“, but no, they told me they both are on there to meet „friends“. I let my illusions go and tried to accept everything as it was.

The funny thing is, I started the draft to this story some days ago. Wanted to write it down to be finished with it and let it go once and for all. Since then I found out they broke up. But this doesn’t mean anything now. I accepted that there will be nothing serious between us, or, at least, I am on the best way to it. I will see him again, because of our mutual friends. So we’ll see how I will do.

I just rarely had such a vibe with someone and it's hard to let that go, you know? Meeting someone you could actually fit together with, someone you feel like you can be authentically yourself in front of at some point, ... it basically never happens. It would have been easier to let it go if he would have been honest and told me in a last talk. Of course, in the beginning I would have been sad as well, but eventually, there is less potential to obsess when it feels finished. And doing the correct thing is what stays, I'm not just saying that, you know I really do appreciate it. Still don't know if I should be angry or just forgive by myself, without ever bringing it up again.

That’s all about this story for now.

I really hope you are good.

Love,

#dear charlie #ZL

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elisaphoenix13 · 4 years

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Mama Bear Drabble 48

Drabble prompt: "I couldn't let you leave without telling you that you are important to me."

By: @funkylittlebidiot (posted with permission).

Laughter rang loudly throughout the living room, cut off by yells and curses as Peter once again beat Thomas at Mario Kart. Cassie and Harley sat on the couch, yelling encouragements or distracting the players. William sat back as he watched it all in fond amusement.

Though the scene warmed him and he could still barely believe that he was experiencing it - that he was part of it - he felt like his battery had been depleted.

He needed some peace and quiet; time to think about everything that had happened over the last two weeks.

From living on the streets to having a warm bed to sleep in, a group of people to stand by and support him, and friends who liked spending time with him,… it was quite the change.

William still felt like it could slip through his fingertips at any moment. He wanted to enjoy it while he could, but he didn’t trust himself not to get attached. He always did, and fate had never before been on their side.

Even though he hated to admit it, he usually got attached before they’d even arrive at the new foster home. He’d always been too much of a dreamer, couldn’t stop his heart’s excitement at the possibility that this next family would be it, would be theirs. No matter how many times he had been wrong, he couldn’t stop hoping.

He got up out of his seat, quietly as to not alert anyone of his movements as he went in search of a quiet corner.

He was good at that; finding holes to hide away in. It was the first thing he did when arriving at a new foster home or school.

The tower was huge, however, and he hadn’t felt the need to, here. He’d found ten promising nooks on his way from the elevator to his room when he’d first arrived, so he figured he could find a place if he needed one.

Besides, it was the first place where they'd had their own rooms.

His first plan was to just head into the kitchen, but when he passed the open door to Tony’s study, he noticed something of interest in the corner.

Glancing around nervously, he took a step inside and was reminded of what Stephen had told him when he’d arrived, about having questions.

“FRIDAY, am I allowed to be in here?”

“Of course,” the voice confirmed from the ceiling. William wasn’t sure he’d ever be used to that. “There are no restricted areas in the tower, except for some parts of the lab and Stark Industry floors.”

“Thank you,” he responded, walking over the chessboard that had caught his attention.

He’d always been intrigued by chess. It had always seemed like this whimsical thing wealthy people just had standing around; the older, prettier, and less used, the better.

Though he’d always eyed the chess tables in the park or library with longing, he’d never had an opportunity to learn.

He took a seat, enjoying how the little nook was quiet despite the yelling still emanating from the living room, and how its spot against the glass allowed him a gorgeous view of the city below.

“FRIDAY?”

“Yes, William?”

“Can you play chess?”

“I could tell you which pieces to move in my stead, yes.”

“Would you teach me?”

The next hour was spend playing chess against the AI. Once he’d learned each piece’s movements and the aim of the game, it seemed so simple. Still, he never came close to beating FRIDAY. He didn’t mind, though, just enjoyed the game and how it was engaging his mind.

“Bishop to G4.” William leaned over to move FRIDAY’s piece, thinking over the board critically before making his own move.

“You left your queen vulnerable, William. Knight to E3; check.”

“Damn,” William muttered under his breath, before moving his tower to protect his queen. “Any advice on what I should have done instead?”

A soft knock on the doorframe startled William, freezing when he noticed Stephen in the doorway.

“May I interrupt?”

He nodded on autopilot, watching Stephen’s every move as he walked over and took a seat opposite him. “So this is where you’ve been hiding?”

William couldn't be sure if he was imagining the hint of amusement in his eyes.

“I’m sorry,” he started, eyes wide, “I asked FRIDAY if I was allowed to be in here and -“

“Of course you are,” Stephen tutted, sending William a reassuring smile. “The other kids just don’t usually come in here. They wouldn’t find anything interesting.”

William didn’t know what to say, so he didn’t bother. He had learned it was best to stay quiet; to just follow the adult’s lead.

“Would you mind if I cut in, FRIDAY?”

“Of course not, Doctor Strange.”

Stephen eyed the board critically, before moving a piece and glancing back up at William. “So, how have you been settling in?”

William kept his gaze on the board, using it as an excuse to hide the warmth spreading up his neck. He tried to think of what piece to move, but he was too nervous to focus.

“F-Fine. Vision and Wanda are very kind for sharing their floor with us.” He felt better after the words had left his mouth, able to breathe more easily now he didn’t have to worry about giving a response. He thought for another second before making his move.

“They’re happy to share,” Stephen smiled as he made his own move.

“They want to take us out for furniture and stuff…,” William blurted out, something that had been on his mind. They’d been trying to postpone it as much as possible, but they were getting more and more persistent. Sitting here in the quiet of their chess game, he, for some reason, felt compelled to bring it up. It felt like a safe space; as if they had nothing better to do than discuss what was bothering him. “Though it’s not like we have any money.”

“Of course you do,” Stephen said matter-of-factly, not even looking up from the board as he studied his next move. “What’s ours is yours.”

“That’s-“

“William, you’re part of our family.” William’s heart stopped when Stephen looked up and met his eyes in a stern gaze. They were a clear blue and fierce, removing any room for debate. “First thing every new kid learns is that we have more than we could ever spend - if some of it goes to making you happy, it’s a worthy cause.”

William didn’t know what to say. He found refuge in the game, looking away from Stephen’s eyes to focus on the board again.

“You haven’t told me how you’re feeling,” Stephen noticed as he was quick to move a piece as if he’d anticipated William’s move. “‘Fine’ isn't the full extent of your feelings, I’m sure. It must be a lot to take in.”

“Not really.” William shrugged, surprising himself by how easily he had said the words. “I mean, we’re used to moving around a lot and living with strangers… it’s just that this place is obviously a lot nicer than we’re used to.”

He made his move, waving off his words. “I don’t want to get accustomed.”

William looked up in time to catch Stephen frowning at him and cursed internally at having said the wrong thing. He'd been getting too comfortable again. It was hard not to when his intuition didn't pick up any red flags from Stephen - which was rare when it came to adults. He quickly ducked his head, trying to hide his blush.

“You’re not going anywhere, William.” Stephen’s voice was firm and determined, convincing William to glance back up at him. “You or your brother.”

The yelling from the living room, which had been a hum in the background, grew louder. William pretended to get distracted by it as he couldn't come up with a response.

Stephen sighed as he followed his gaze, glaring in the direction of the living room. There was a loud thudding sound before someone yelled an affronted “MOM!”.

William hesitantly glanced towards Stephen. He wasn’t expecting him to get angry - he had seen enough in his two weeks here that he knew Stephen wasn’t the type. He knew normal parents don’t usually get upset about some noise, but he hadn’t expected him to roll his eyes with so much fondness either. It seemed too out of place.

“It was nice sitting in the quiet with you, William,” Stephen turned back to him with a smile, though he did seem genuinely regretful to leave, “but I’m afraid duty calls.”

William nodded, turning back to look at how they’d left the board. He wanted to finish the game with FRIDAY, and leave Stephen to resolve whatever was going on, before joining the rest again.

“One thing,” Stephen said, causing William to look up at him again with a questioning expression. “I can’t leave without telling you that you are important to me. You and Thomas.”

William swallowed against the lump in his throat, not sure how to react, but Stephen wasn’t yet finished. He took a step closer to him, placing a comforting hand on William’s shoulder. He looked up to meet his eyes, finding Stephen watching him with a soft smile.

“I know that might seem hard to believe after only two weeks, but we get attached quickly.” He grinned, lightly squeezing William’s shoulder before stepping away. “Like it or not; you’re stuck with us.”

#supremefamily #mama bear stephen strange #mama bear au #william kaplan #drabble #stephen strange

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commander-orca · 3 years

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COTW FANFICTION

CHAPTER 8: MY ANGER LOVES YOU DEARLY

It was rare for Rochalizo to feel such uneasiness in the face of a mundane situation of this kind. He knew he was the type to resist others’ bad state of minds and could ignore without too much difficulty or sympathy those who gave in to tears or panic. A few months ago, he used to be insensitive to the suffering of others, even laughing at those who felt easily pressured or sad. Few things could move him in Amonlogia, where he struggled to find his place and crossed the city from day to day, withdrawn and shut in like an oyster. Here, it was different. He had the unpleasant feeling that his shell had split open to the limit. Suddenly he was attached to anyone and was moved by everything; recent events had upset him and broken through all his emotional defenses. His promise to help the residents still stood. But he was now sure he would not come back unscathed from this adventure. After the attack by the Gerakis forces, the smallest things worried him and this weapon which he usually carried casually around his belt, forgetting it most of the time, was now found a frightening number of times in his hands, clutching at the slightest suspicious noise. He had become far more protective than he ever thought he would be, keeping an eye on the locals, counting their numbers sometimes.

The light was barely reaching his legs, which were crossed on the chair in the corner of the room; the air smelled of ink and musty. With a weak breath, he cleared away from his sight the long wick which fell on his eyes. He was in the central tower of the island, in the room used by consultants as a meeting place to discuss and deliver certain laws and decisions of average, sometimes negligible importance. This place also served as an office for filling out papers, drafting decrees and speeches. More importantly, it was the antechamber opening onto the tower’s large balcony from which the captain spoke. For half an hour already, everyone had been busy in this too small room - which, let's be honest, had real claustrophobic effects - in order to finalize the imminent speech of the leader. Papers flew in all directions, pens fluttered, consultants made a few final recommendations, their insufferable voices taking on a high pitched tone with each turn of the clock hand which throbbed in the hubbub as uncomfortable as the heat. Backed up against the wall, Suoh put up with these recommendations, head bowed, his hand gripping the wall, barely standing on his legs. He looked pale, on the verge of fainting ... Rochalizo turned his head away, feeling that familiar retching resurface.

It was with Suoh that he had been most surprised. Staying by his side had taught him patience, when he had had to refrain from putting his stupid brain back in place ... But also had somehow, developed, he reluctantly admitted, his sense of empathy. , his kindness and selflessness. Being in the company of such a loving person must have rubbed off on him. What came next wouldn't surprise anyone; he had become attached to him, his usual gentleness sometimes relieving his moments of doubt or distress. It was something that had fascinated him from start to finish; the cries, the threats, any attempt to destroy him ... He responded to all of this with doubly more destructive outbursts of kindness.

That kindness had ended up grating, though, inevitably. So much so that Suoh once asked him to teach him how to shoot. So that he could end human lives. Rochalizo hated this turnaround. He had had fun at the start, making fun of him and his unconsciousness and like a child in whom one would take pleasure in distorting their innocence, he could not help but communicate his cynicism, his sense of the opportunism. But the dreadful realization that each day the young chief began to resemble himself and his brothers, aroused in him a nauseating disgust. Suddenly he felt guilty and if he had been able to turn back time so that Suoh would forever remain an ignorant lulled in sweet delusions, he would have done so without a regret. The worst had been when he had watched him with his own eyes wield a weapon, shoot innocent people, he who was repelled by all forms of violence ... It had seemed to him at the time that by shooting these bullets in the chest soldiers, Suoh had at the same time eradicated what he had been. The former Suoh was probably dead. And the new Suoh had almost been gone. A few hopes away from being changed into a flesh doll, a moving corpse forever. Recovered, -or almost-, he had only been entitled to a few ridiculous hours of convalescence before having to resume his role. Perhaps that was why this kindness dissolved like honey in tea, because people were exploiting the resources he had, without ever sparing him or treating him.

This is why, when he saw Suoh, with a pale face and folded hands, slump against the wall and pray for the speech to be postponed, Rochalizo felt his stomach turn violently. Near the young chief, the advisers in their long sober dresses, mingled in protests and in virulent encouragements. They formed a tight circle around him, some standing, loudly indignant, others leaning over him like idle parents over-brooding their offspring. Rochalizo uncrossed his legs, getting up to approach the stage. Suoh had crouched down with his back to the wall, the top of his head was covered with his hands in despondency and his eyes were closed and constricted. Even in the shadow of his elders, his waxy complexion was striking. His disheveled hair and his wrinkled tunic were proof that he had slept too little to think of taking care of his image.The elder counselor went into a fit of nervous anger, this Kuchiba who apparently served as a mentor figure to Suoh, but who Rochalizo thought to be useful only for unnecessary stress.

"Come on Suoh, get up, you have to go!" Everyone is counting on you! He insisted, trying to pull him by the shoulders.

"You have to go anyway, they're all together downstairs already," the black-haired counselor whispered to him, crouching down next to her boss.

Suoh lowered his head into his knees. His breathing was wheezing and his fingernails hollowed out his scalp, strands of light hair pulled painfully through his fingers. His knees against each other had started to shake.

“Please,” he begged once again, “I can't do it. I'm not going to make it... "There was a short silence during which the advisers looked at each other in dismay. Kuchiba reordered his neatly stacked papers and grumbled under his breath, stunned.

"I don't understand what puts him in such an awful state...

-It can't be the stage fright, he was never really impressed by all this ... "

At the back of the room, their only view of the outside, this panorama of a grandiose blue sky offered by the opening in the clay had become dizzying. The heat waves just came in and out, wrapped around their clothes. From the lodge there was an impatient, ragged hum. There was something oppressive about the roar of the sea, coming and going.

Shinono, the youngest counselor, took a soothing voice and matched it with a hand on her shoulder.

"Suoh, answer ... Tell us what's wrong ..."

Rochalizo couldn't take it anymore. If a single stupid phrase came out of their mouths again, he was going to implode. Did they not see? In this state, nothing could be earned from him. The poor monkey was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. And a bunch of loud morons was sure to increase his agitation.

“Suoh, hey! What will people say if you-

-They won’t say shit, folks. Get away ! Rochalizo retorted, working his way through the advisers to Suoh.

His face had taken on two shades of red in anger and his irregular breathing showed that he was barely controlling himself not to give in to aggressive behaviour. With a few rustles of fabric, he joined the chef and grabbed him firmly by the arm. His annoyance worked on his strength as he managed to lift Suoh with just one effort. Suoh was so surprised he didn't say a word. The advisers now gathered around Rochalizo, watching him with a sort of admiration on his face. Poor, they were going to be disappointed.

"Can't you see he can't do it ?! Leave him alone! He snapped to their attention as he crossed the room, holding a still dazed Suoh around the waist.

Finally, the advisers seemed to understand that things were not going to turn in their favor. Their protests grew heavier. Several followed them to the door.

" Hey ! Come back! Kuchiba exclaimed, brandishing his fist in the air, "The speech should have started at least a good three minutes ago!" "

But Rochalizo was determined not to stop. He could feel it, he had to get it out of here. He crossed the threshold of the door not looking back, furious.

"Improvise your bloody speech yourself!" The only thing he's going to do is go rest! "

Rochalizo then took the direction of the hut in which Suoh dwelled, walking in determined strides. The heels of his boots clattered against the dry clay, and his sword, tied to his belt, clanged faintly in the long hanging gallery. Suoh still hadn't said a word to him; maybe he thought it was pointless. Either way, the silence sounded like elusive, crestfallen approval. He quickened his pace, convinced, and went out into the pleasantly deserted streets, since everyone had gone to the tower to hear the speech which would not be spoken.

Arrived at Suoh's, the young man heard himself sigh with relief; to be honest, he didn't really know what he had expected. Perhaps a neglected bedroom that would have allowed him to find with compelling evidence that something was wrong with him. He could not say, however, if he was more relieved than annoyed. If he listened to that little voice in his head and the way his fists clenched against his leg, he was sure he wanted to find something. Indeed, the current situation left him nothing concrete to be able to confront Suoh without appearing to be a nosy or a sentimental idiot. Rochalizo coughed to dispel his discomfort and grabbed Suoh by the shoulders, seating him on the bed, but this discomfort instead of disappearing, filled him up him like water in a bathtub. Suoh gave him a grateful look.

"Rochalizo ... Thank you".

The young man met his eyes, embarrassed. His hands tightened around the stakes on the footboards. What was to answer that? He was probably worse than those stupid advisers. Suoh was old enough to fend for himself, to support his own choices on his own, and Rochalizo had only acted like a mother hen, as if Suoh was a little child in need of a chaperone. He felt ashamed that he had behaved so impulsively and thought he understood exactly what his friend in the tower was feeling.

"Uh ... well ..." he began, rubbing the tip of his boot against the edge of the pink carpet.

But in the end, wasn't it all Suoh's fault? His index and middle finger, both set with thick golden rings, came to rest on the top of his mouth. He could not be blamed for wishing to check his condition. If Suoh had shown himself to be truly responsible, he would have made the decision to return home on his own and would have asserted himself. His tearful demeanor was causing concern to everyone around him, so it was his fault. The fool, why didn't he say anything if he felt low ?! Was he going to let everyone walk all over him until there was nothing left of him ?! Rochalizo fixed his eyes on those of the young chief, invigorated with a new irascibility. Furious, he leaned over Suoh and grabbed him by the collar violently, bringing his silly face close to his.

"WHAT WAS THAT, EH ?! CARE TO EXPLAIN WHAT HAPPENED IN YOUR HEAD ?! DO YOU THINK YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO START YOUR LITTLE BREAKDOWN ON A WHIM?! STUPID MONKEY!”

Suoh froze, scared. His eyes, wide open in dismay, did not let go of Rochalizo's. For the first time of the day, to the immense satisfaction of the marquis, these green pupils had stopped looking at him without seeing him and gave him all their attention. Suoh had stopped seeing him as the ghost of someone he could push away and lie to as he pleased. Oh because Suoh hadn't said much yet but Rochalizo knew he would try to lie to him. The smile he had given him with his thanks had already been.

"Rochalizo ...

-DONT TALK! I’M FED UP WITH YOU! "

Suoh blinked several times, stunned to be scolded like this. Rochalizo released his garment and thrust his varnished index finger into his chest. His tone of voice had dropped, but he was still speaking loudly and the nervousness in his words was palpable. He was fuming.

"Now, instead of worrying everyone, you're going to rest! I’m leaving you no choice! ”

Immediately giving shape to his words, the marquis walked around the bed and pushed aside the covers of the box spring, shook the pillow to air it out and also straightened the headboard. Suoh watched him do it, speechless. When he was done, he dragged Suoh by the shoulders to the other end of his bed and pulled the covers back over his knees.

" Lay over. Or do you want me to do that for you too?”, He mumbled, staring at a still frozen Suoh.

Suoh swallowed his lips lightly, probably in the throes of an inner dilemma. He chose still to be docile and to submit to Rochalizo's requests, if it could not be said that they were rather radical orders. His face crumpled up a bit and he proceeded to push the corners of the duvet and bedspreads between the mattress and the frame once Suoh was lying between the sheets. The action made him blush, it was strange to find himself there tucking Suoh in and especially expressing his concern to him so openly. His pride had just taken a hell of a beating ... It was also just as unsettling to be leaning over him like a protector and showing this facet of himself being... Soft? How awful... Rochalizo suddenly stepped back, his cheeks flushed.

" Is everything alright ? Suoh asked, who had just jumped from his sudden withdrawal.

"Uh ... Yeah, yeah, it's fine, it's fine ..."

Rochalizo had replied automatically. His brain took a few seconds to process their short exchange. Once again, he felt anger radiate through him.

“A minute. You’re the one asking me that ?! "Suoh hunched over like a shriveled flower, fearing another fit of anger. But the insufferable habit he had of always taking care of others to his disadvantage took over this time.

“Accept my apologies if I’ve offended you, Rochalizo. You look anxious to me, that's why I'm asking "

Rochalizo would have liked to give him scold him again, it was not the urge that he lacked and the blood still boiled in his veins to this effect. However, he could only stare at him in the whites of his eyes and crush his face into his hand. Sighing, he sat down on the side of the bed, giving Suoh barely a second to shift his legs.

"You really don't get it, you hopeless case."

Suoh straightened up on his elbows, attentive to his movements. Rochalizo imagined, knowing him, that he was already looking for a way to be forgiven. This simple thought was enough to upset him. Why was he like this? Why was Suoh just a bunch of second thoughts whose contents he’d never reveal to others? It didn't make things any easier ...

"I don't quite understand, but if it's because of the speech ...

"Obviously it's because of the speech," muttered the marquis, his head bowed, through his teeth.

"My intention was not to be a burden to you," Suoh whispered to him, after he had straightened up and he put a pale hand on his forearm, "Nor to cause you to worry. Forgive me ".

-Suoh, is that hard for you not to speak in apologies? Rochalizo cursed at him, his eyes dark.

Suoh gave him a rueful smile.

"I guess I'll drop the apologies for today."

They both let the calm of the small room overwhelm them. It was lukewarm and the down was as comfortable on the top as it was when standing inside. Rochalizo's eye was drawn to the pots of cacti that bloomed at their own pace on the shelf and the many tubs of blue flowers that were becoming more beautiful every day. Bathing in the only ray of sunlight, a miniature tomato plant gleamed quietly and grew, more fertile than ever, given a perfectly adequate amount of water. An ear of lavender, too long to be arranged, escaped from one of the open drawers of the dresser, kept in a patch of damp earth. Everything here breathed life and thrived through the care and love that was given to them. Everything ... Except one thing.

Suoh rested his head gently against Rochalizo's shoulder. It was done gradually, first because his position stiffened the back of his neck and tilting his head seemed like a good compromise. Then because he realized that words might be too much in this heated dispute caused by clumsy misunderstandings. Rochalizo surely would never admit it, but those little gestures were at fault if he didn't manage to hold it against Suoh for too long. When his cheek was pressed against his shoulder, he felt caught in the whirlwind of something bigger than himself, of a universal and unconditional tenderness that did not belong to humans.

Rochalizo did not look at him, but as he got lost in the pots of the blue flowers, had the impression that their eyes had met. His azure fingernails scraped his own thigh despite being able to do anything.

"I don't like it when you’re not looking after yourself ..."

Too fast, too recklessly, Suoh's fingers had speared his face and forced him to watch him from up close. His face surrounded by his hair was like the tall trees of a forest which covered the sky and made you lose your way. Not this scary perdition, rather this unstoppable urge to run through the woods and never come back. A powerful instinct to obey that insistent question that came to mind who whispered "What would happen if I ran away from all civilization and got lost in these woods?" Rochalizo exhaled painfully.

"Your concern is precious to me".

A smile. A simple and yet too evocative smile. In a flash, Rochalizo recognized in those cursed features the memory of an expression that had paralyzed him, that had haunted his nights these days, had even given him nightmares. For a moment, he saw the gunshots again, the murderous rifle in those white hands, the rows of helmets and iron boots, the cries and those words he heard echo every time his feet brought him back unconsciously at this location.

"No ... No, shut up, it's not concern," he gasped, breathlessly, holding back his despair, "You ... you really don't understand."

Not giving in to tears, all that remained was anger. It was the best he could do after all.

"There is no one more inconsiderate than you! Can't you see you're screwing yourself up ?! And for whom? For a herd of ungrateful people who don't even see how much you sacrifice yourself for them! "

His face slipped out of Suoh's reach but Rochalizo didn't back down. He confronted him with fierce aplomb. Suoh was the one who looked down at this accusation he couldn't afford to deny.

"It is the role of the leader of the Whale, I cannot oppose it-

-Who is preventing you ?!

- ... But I'm happy. I am happy to offer myself to its inhabitants ... "Suoh continued, ignoring his interruption," I don't think this is a sacrifice.

-So you are completely blind!”, Rochalizo exploded, his eyes so dilated they looked like they were going to disappear.

His breathing heavy, he resumed, swallowing behind clenched teeth:

“You are just a puppet that they use to ensure the obedience of the people. They steal your life away with all their prohibitions. And in the meantime, they let you destroy yourself. But by carrying on like this, you will soon be incapacitated. And all those people you care about so much, they're all going to DIE ”.

Suoh flinched and jumped back suddenly, as if the Marquis had just burned his face with a tinplate. He clenched his fists, his fingernails sunk so deeply into his palms that he was quickly seized with a sharp pain. He couldn't understand. Rochalizo was just a foreigner. He hadn't grown up here. He knew nothing of the ties that bound the inhabitants to each other or to this island, nor of this ineffably sacred responsibility which had become his.

“No one else is going to die,” Suoh bellowed, “You don't know what you're talking about!

-Of course I know!

-No, you who fleed your country like an egoist, you know nothing of what I feel! I could die for them! Suoh yelled at him, his face twisted in frustration, trembling with fury, his mouth twisted.

He was about to hear Rochalizo and counter whatever he said, to say something else, maybe something that could be hurtful. Something that could have convinced him that what he was claiming. But Rochalizo stopped screaming. He lowered his head and grabbed his hands, crushed them in his.

"You fool ... Can't you see? I don't want you to die ”.

Suoh fell silent. Then the origin of the problem suddenly became clear to him. Slowly approaching Rochalizo, he pressed his forehead to the top of his head. The young man bore the same smell as him, the smell of milk. Why had Suoh said all those mean things? He belonged here, with them.

"It won't happen, Rochalizo".

Rochalizo gripped Suoh's face aggressively once again. This time his voice was sharp, threatening.

"Don't even dare to promise me such things!" It was only a few days ago when you ran towards the soldiers and ... I ... ", he shook his head to keep from thinking back to those terrifying events," I forbid you to speak of death as lightly as you do! "- he tightened his fist next to his face -" Suoh, in truth I do not care about your story of sacrifice. All I'm trying to tell you is ... Take care of yourself better than that! You have no idea what you're doing to yourself! Do you think you can live on sleepless nights, non-stop services to others and the punishments that you inflict on yourself ?! By neglecting your health ?! "

Suoh blinked, shocked, breathless. Even if he had wanted to speak, the words would not have come out.

" Lay over. I will not repeat it. "

Rochalizo got up from the bed, pretending that this exchange of screams hadn't happened. Staring down at him, he stared at him sternly, arms crossed, waiting for Suoh to do as he ordered. Suoh couldn't move for a few seconds. It seemed to him that Rochalizo's gaze pierced his skin like a million flamethrowers. The young chef quickly lay down and pulled the covers to his neck. Then Rochalizo came back to him and knelt at his bedside. He took Suoh's hands back in his and buried his face onto the mattress.

“You, forgive me. I didn't mean to scare you. You know very well that it is not against you that I am screaming ”.

Suoh slowly nodded. A slight piteous smile split his cheeks. His hand trailed tenderly through Rochalizo's hair.

"I didn't want to admit it but I'm afraid you're right ..."

Rochalizo looked up hopefully in his direction.

"Maybe thinking about myself once in a while would help, but ... I've always put others before me. I don't know how to take care of myself and ... I don't know if I would get any satisfaction from it ... "

Rochalizo smiled back and his eyes closed on his lids. His mocking sneer echoed through the room, but his face was marked with an unusual solar glee.

"Lucky you that I’m a selfish person then. Because I happen to know a ton of ways ”.

Suoh stared at his face, dazzled by Rochalizo's smile and he felt a familiar form of peace wash over him. For the first time, he was letting someone lift up the hearts and lighten up the mood for him. And he felt good. It was a small start, but it was a start.

#cotw #cotw fanfiction #fanfiction #rochalizo #suoh #suou #rohalito #knk #Kujira no Kora #Kujira no Kora wa Sajou ni Utau #children of the whale #children of the Whales #les enfants de la baleine

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ghostofviperwrites · 4 years

Text

Suzuki Gunz Crime Family - Chapter 5

warnings: explicit language, criminal activity

July 7, 1997

Thinking about Desperado’s past reminded Minoru of another important happening. Leaning over to Taichi he caught his friend’s attention.

“Have we controlled the leak at the warehouse?” Minoru asked as they awaited the arrival of the rest of their family. Taichi took a long moment before answering, a trait that Minoru was well familiar with. Taichi rarely spoke off the cuff, without having thought through his response. Especially when it came to business. Yes he was an asshole and yes he had a temper, but Minoru would never have cause to doubt anything the man said.

“I don’t know that I would go so far as to say it’s controlled.” Taichi hedged. “I was thinking of sending the twins in.” The twins were neither twins, nor related in any way. Nor did they look the least bit alike. But it was a nickname Kanemaru had dubbed on the twosome and it had stuck. “If there’s anything to find out, they will. We’ve got the main guy, but I’ve got a gut feeling there’s more there.”

“Speak of the Devils and they shall appear,” Iizuka chuckled as the door burst open and their two larger than life brothers appeared. Lance Archer and Davey Boy Smith. Two American boys who had somehow became an integral part of a Japanese crime family. Minoru tried not to let his distaste for Davey’s fashion choice show, though he was sure the older man knew. If it wasn’t loud and obnoxious the 22-year-old wanted nothing to do with it. In contrast his partner in crime Lance Archer gravitated towards jeans and t-shirts. Neither styles were Minoru’s cup of tea, but he wasn’t going to force his views on anyone. With Lance clocking in at 6’8’ and Davey at 6’5” the two men towered over the rest of the group. Fiercely protective and with an appetite for violence the men served as enforcers for Minoru. Without a doubt they were his master interrogators. After tonight they would have titles, but both had made it abundantly clear to Minoru that they would prefer to remain hands on in their duties.

Lighting a cigar Minoru sat back in his seat, tossing his feet up on the table as Lance and Davey made themselves comfortable, grabbing a couple beers each and taking a seat. Watching the two Minoru thought how apt the “twins” nickname was for them. The almost moved in concert, completely in tune with one another. They preferred to work together and tended to gravitate to each other in gatherings. It was how they had come to Kanemaru’s attention.

Flashback December 12, 1995

One of Kanemaru’s many talents was being invisible. If he didn’t want to be noticed, he wasn’t. Point blank. Keeping to the outskirts of the party Kanemaru kept his eyes focused and ears open. No one even noticed the boy slinking around the edges, lingering to hear bits of conversation not meant for Minoru Suzuki’s ears. But Kanemaru’s ears were Minoru’s and hear he did. Talk was flowing much more freely now that Minoru had made his exit. He heard whispers of Minoru being all alone. Easy pickings. A simple target. Plots to usurp the boy and take his family over. Kanemaru’s face remained carefully blank as he passed around the crowd, though inside he wanted to gut the fuckers. It pissed him off listening to these assholes dismissing his friend like that. Reaching for his ever present flask Kanemaru through back a shot of whisky the familiar burn in his throat bringing him clarity. Continuing his scouting Kanemaru stopped short and backed into the wall as he came upon two huge American boys. Though they looked a bit undernourished for their size. But it was neither their size nor their nationality that caught Kanemaru’s attention. It was their conversation.

“Fucking Minoru man,” The taller of the two said with a shake of his head, his long brown hair falling over his shoulders. “They’re all fools if they’re betting against that asshole.”

“Shit yeah.” The blonde concurred. “I have no doubt that Minoru is going to do everything fucking thing he said. Wonder where that’s going to leave us?”

“Can’t be wore than it has been Davey. Besides I don’t think Minoru is anything like his old man.” The tall one said. “Fuck old man Suzuki. Asshole.”

“Amen brother.” Davey concurred.

Kanemaru watched the exchange with interest, his instincts telling him these were two men they could use on their side. With some apparent bitterness towards Minoru’s father, Kanemaru wanted to find out the source of it. A festering anger against the elder Suzuki could cause animosity towards MiSu, but that wasn’t the sense he got from these two. Kanemaru found himself curious where they came from and how they had ended up in the family.

Sliding along the wall he left the conversation behind, meeting up with Taichi by the entrance to the kitchen. His eyes narrowed as he saw Minoru in the pantry, meeting his friends eyes across the busy kitchen and receiving a minute shake of the head. Minoru would fill them in when necessary. Message received Kanemaru nodded and turned his attention back to Taichi.

“See those two big fuckers?” Kanemaru asked pointing them out and receiving a nod from Taichi. “You know them?” Taichi was a little more familiar with the family than Kanemaru, given his father’s restaurant catered to the family and people tend to run their mouth around faceless waiters.

“Lance Archer and Davey Smith,” Taichi responded after a moment of thinking through what he knew about the men. “Both 22. Senior brought them over from one of his trips stateside. Nobody really knows the full story of what went down. Badass boys with a taste for blood and big chip on their shoulders. Senior plays on their strengths. Which is hurting people. If I’m remembering correctly they share a place down by the docks. Pretty sure he barely paid them. Said the owed him for bringing them here.” Taichi smirked at Kanemaru. “That hasn’t exactly created goodwill towards the Suzuki name.”

“Yeah, that’s the impression I got from them. But they seem to like MiSu. I don’t know why, but it bears checking out.” Kanemaru said. “I just got a feeling.”

Taichi took a renewed interest in the two men at Kanemaru’s proclamation. He trusted Kanemaru. If he had a feeling they belonged, they probably did.

“Maybe we need to make a visit.” Taichi said with Kanemaru nodding in agreement.

June 23, 1996

Unfortunately that visit ended up being postponed for several months. First with Taka’s introduction to the family subsequent revenge, and then El Desperado being brought into the fold. His vengeance was still owed, but Kanemaru believed bringing Lance and Davey in would be beneficial to that undertaking. With Despy’s agreement of course.

Climbing out of the passenger’s seat of Iizuka’s SUV, Minoru’s lip curled up in distaste as he looked at the conditions members of his father’s supposed family were living in. This was a slum. There was no other word for it and Minoru was disgusted that his father would let them live like this. Looking at the tiny stand alone unit they lived in Minoru couldn’t fathom how one person could live there. Let alone two. Certainly not two men of their size.

“Are we all even going to be able to fit in there?” Taichi asked, his lip curling as he watched rats scurry around.

“Why didn’t you tell me they were living this horridly?” Minoru snapped at Kanemaru turning the force of his glare on his friend. Minoru felt guilt seeping through him. If these men were the family Kanemaru and Taichi believed they could be, he put other family members above them and that didn’t sit well with him. Taka and Despy were no more important than any other member. Yes their situations may have been more urgent, but he still felt wrong for letting Lance and Davey suffer in the meantime. He could have done something.

“I didn’t know MiSu.” Kanemaru said. “We’ve been a little busy lately.”

He didn’t take MiSu’s wrath personally. He understood the pressure MiSu was under. Kanemaru himself was feeling regret for not knowing their situation. Even if they couldn’t have taken them in until now they could have at least siphoned some extra money into their pockets. Made their lives a bit more comfortable.

Desperado and Taka stood silently with wide eyes taking in the interaction between the four longtime friends. They were never made to feel like outsiders, had been welcomed into the tight knit group immediately, but they were still new to this family and were a bit unsure as to what they were supposed to do. So they stood behind their newfound family and walked with them towards the little shack that served as the home of Lance Archer and Davey Smith.

When Davey answered the knock on their door, the last thing he expected was to find the Kumichō and his Kobun standing there. He nervously reached towards the lead pipe kept by the door, Lance catching the movement and reaching for his own blade resting on the end table next to the couch. If they were here to eliminate them they were going to have a fight on their hands.

“We’re not here to harm you.” Minoru said holding his hands up peaceably. “We just wish to talk.” Something about Minoru’s calm voice and earnest eyes told Davey he could believe him, glancing over his shoulder at Lance for confirmation before he released his weapon and stepped back to allow them entrance.

With the eight men in the tiny space they were practically on top of each other, Minoru standing by the door and looking around their surroundings with ill hidden disdain.

“It’s not much, but it’s what our pathetic pay allows.” Davey said defensively.

“You’re right.’ Minoru said surprising him. “You’re pay is pathetic. It’s a situation that is going to be rectified. Not only for you two, but for the rest of the outlying members of the Family.” He leaned back against the door, taking his time in evaluating the two men. He could imagine the uproar that was going to be heard when he named to non-Japanese men to his cabinet. Probably would be more of an outcry about that than the two minors. Minoru didn’t give a fuck about tradition. He cared about what was right for his family, and adding these two the immediate family was the right decision. He agreed with Kanemaru and Taichi. These two belonged.

“I’ve been remiss in rectifying the financial situations in this family and for that I apologize.” Minoru gave them a slight bow, shocking them at his show of respect. “I have plenty of excuses, but none of them are justified.” Kanemaru’s snorted in disagreement earning a sharp look from Minoru.

“Oh come off it Minoru. You’re a 17 year old running a fucking crime empire. You’ve been a bit busy trying not to get murdered, usurped and rescuing strays. You can be forgiven if you haven’t been able to right every wrong your father has committed in six months.” Kanemaru said. He wasn’t going to let his brother stand there and self-flagellate himself.

“He’s right.” Lance spoke for the first time. “You can’t fix everything in one night. Your father was very successful. But he got that successful stepping on the little people. You seem like an alright dude Minoru and we appreciate your willingness to try and fix things.” Davey nodded in agreement with his friend’s comments.

“What we don’t understand is why you’re here. With your kobun. And whoever the boy and masked freak is.” Lance said.

“This masked freak will cut out your fucking tongue and watch you choke to death on your own blood.” Desperado spat rising to his feet as his temper flared. Minoru didn’t say a word, watching the interaction between the two men he hoped would be family. No he didn’t like the insult to Desperado, but it was Desperado’s battle and Minoru was pleased to see he wasn’t the least bit intimidated by the behemoth who had insulted him.

Lance startled everyone by laughing loudly. Fuck he hadn’t expected the little guy to have the balls to front to him.

“I like him.” Lance declared.

“Lance, Davey. You know my kobun Kanemaru, Iizuka, and Taichi. The freak” he emphasized the word letting Lance know he was displeased with his phrasing. “With the mask is Desperado. The kid next to him is Taka Michinoku. Both are future members of my kobun and will be afforded the respect they deserve.” Davey and Lance exchanged a glance and nodded, warning well received. “I understand the two of you have been greatly wronged by my father; however, I am not aware of how you came to be part of the family. Would you be so kind as to fill us in?”

“Senior found us in Texas.” Davey said. “Lance and I met when we were seven. He was brought to the home I was being fostered in after Daddy killed momma and himself. I’d been in homes since I was born to a crack whore of a mother. Nobody wanted to keep me. Scared I was tainted by her blood.” He spat bitterly. “When Lance showed up, I knew right then. That was my brother. He was my family.” Lance’s head bobbed in agreement. The two had nobody but themselves and they liked it that way. Except for right now he was feeling that sense of family with this ragtag bunch in his home and that was confusing to say the least.

“Davey had only been there about a month when I came along.” Lance spoke up. “We stuck around for about a month before we got the fuck out of there. That family didn’t give a shit, all they wanted was our checks. So we figured living on the streets wasn’t going to be any worse. We could starve and wear raggedy ass clothes on our own. But we were a couple of scrawny ass kids trying to be hard so we got the shit kicked out of us. Lost count of how many broken bones I’ve had. Didn’t get no doctors, we had to deal with that shit ourselves.” He held up his right arm which had an awkward bend to the elbow. “This never did heal right.”

“Eventually we decided we had to learn how to fight. So we would steal books from the library on fighting and we taught ourselves. Took a few years, but eventually we handled ourselves better than any fucker out on those streets.” Davey said. “We lived by stealing. We had to steal our food and our money. Break into houses to get a shower. We learned through error. We figured out how to get around alarms and dogs and guns. Eventually we grew. People figured out real quick not to fuck with us.”

Kanemaru listened intently to their story, but paid close attention to their interactions. It almost seemed to him that they were an extension of each other. One didn’t operate cohesively without the other. The way they seamlessly told their story spoke to him. He had seen it before over the course of his 16 years, but only with twins. That was how they became forevermore dubbed the twins in his mind.

“Eventually we started doing odd for less than savory individuals out of Austin. We weren’t ever concerned with operating on the right side of the law.” Lance laughed. “We were just out for ourselves. We made enough money to get rent a room from a place that didn’t ask questions about their 16 year old tenants and things were just fine. Everything was golden until Senior showed up.” Lance’s eyes turned cold and hard. “I still don’t know what the fuck he was doing in Elgin Texas of all fucking places. Little fucking hole in the middle of nowhere. But someone opened their mouths about us to Senior and he took an interest. Had us dragged out of our beds in the middle of the night and thrown on his damn plane. His men beat the shit out of us until we couldn’t stand.” His fist clenched as he remembered that day. “Locked is in a fucking cage and fed us scraps like dogs. None of them spoke English so we never knew what the fuck was happening til we got here to Japan. Then Senior’s saiko komon filled us in. Said we belonged to the family now. We belonged to Senior.”

“Fucking ridiculous.” Davey spat. “Stupid thing is we would have come along and worked for them if they just asked. Had nothing keeping us in the US. Instead they forced us into service. Beat us until we complied. We were in a foreign country, with a language we didn’t speak. We couldn’t get out. He kept us on his nice little leash until the day he died.”

Minoru’s head hung as he absorbed their story. He really hated his fucking father sometimes. How many other stories were there out there like theirs? Forced into serving the family’s needs. That was a good way to get yourself killed. How was that to build loyalty? Bonds were made stronger by freedom of will.

Looking at his kobun Minoru knew his thoughts were plain as day on his face and one by one they nodded in agreement with his decision.

“I can only apologize for the wrongs my father has done to you.” Minoru said quietly. “That is not how I intend to run this family and it makes me sick to think how many others have stories similar to yours. This is not what I came here to offer, but after hearing your story I feel I must.” He looked each of the men in the eyes, letting them see his true sympathies. “You were brought into this family without choice. You were brought to this country against your will. You have been wronged and I will do everything in my power to make it right. You are free to leave the family if you so desire. I will make reparations to make you financially secure. Should you wish to return to your country, I will make it happen.”

Davey couldn’t hide his surprise at the offer. Sure Minoru said things were going to be different, but he hadn’t expected an offer of freedom. Looking at Lance he saw the same surprise reflected on his face.

“What were you here to offer before you heard our story?” Lance asked.

“Family.” Minoru said simply, the rest of them nodding their head as one in agreement with his statement.

That feeling Lance had earlier returned in full force as he stared in shock at his Kumichō. He certainly couldn’t mean that. There was no way he was extending an offering to joining his kobun. Lance looked around the room from Taichi, and Iizuka to Kanemaru and Desperado, to Taka who looked to not even be in his teens yet. Hard men, all of them, before they were even men. Yet they all had a peace in their eyes. Family. Something Lance longed for so badly. Something he only had with Davey. Turning to Davey, he saw the same fierce longing that he was sure was in his own eyes. For so long both of them had been seeking acceptance, having given up on finding it. Only to have it offered by the son of the man they hated.

“We’re already part of your family. What do you mean by that?” Davey asked not daring to believe.

“Kanemaru saw it first the night of my coronation. Taichi concurred. As did Iizuka. Being here tonight and speaking to you solidifies it for me. Desperado and Taka, while not yet official members, get as much say as any of us and they are in agreement. We feel you would be an integral part of our family. What we’re offering is to be a part of our” He made a sweeping motion to his brothers. “Family. Not the Suzuki Gun Crime Family. Though you would of course be a part of that as a part of my kobun. But our family.”

Davey and Lance excused themselves, stepping outside and discussion the offer for several moments before returning.

“Alright. We’re in.” They said.

Japanese Translations:

Kobun – underlings/cabinet

Kumichō – Boss

saiko komon – senior advisor – like consigliere in American mafia

#sgcf #Suzuki gunz crime family #Suzuki gunz fanfic #Suzuki gunz imagine #njpw fanfic #wrestling fanfic #mywriting #ghostofviperwrites

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moiraineswife · 6 years

Note

How about 18 or 3 for the writing prompt? For jester/Yasha of course

Jester/Yasha + 3 ‘Please, just stay a little longer’

“You need to work out less,” Molly informed Yasha as he supported her into the common room of the Leaky Tap, sagging slightly under her bulk.

Yasha just grunted, swaying unsteadily. Molly glanced up at her and saw that her eyes were heavy and already half-closed.

Concern pulsing through him now he kicked the door unceremoniously open and softened his voice when he said, “We’re nearly there, you’ll be alright in a moment.”

As soon as they entered, there was a soft gasp from the far corner and a moment later, Jester was in front of them, babbling as she gaped at the bloody ruin that, a few hours previously, had been Yasha.

“What happened?” she demanded, gingerly peeling a shred of ruined cloth away from Yasha’s chest so she could better see the grisly wounds slashed across it.

“Someone tried to kill me,” Molly replied grimly, then jerked his head at Yasha and added, “She took offence.”

“Damn right I did,” Yasha slurred thickly.

Molly patted her on the head with his tail, his hands currently being occupied with stopping Yasha sinking to the floor, something that was becoming increasingly difficult as she struggled to maintain consciousness.

“What?” Jester said, momentarily distracted, gazing up at Molly with big blue eyes. “Who tried to kill you?” she asked, and, without waiting for an answer, “When did they do this? And why? Was it something to do with Lucien? Or was it something to do with you, because you know, Molly, I love you and everything but you are very murder-able sometimes and-”

“Jester,” Molly interrupted, gritting her name out between clenched teeth, “Can we do this later? Yash-”

“Oh!” Jester exclaimed, cottoning on, “Of course, of course, come on Yasha, we’ll take you over here and I’ll get you all sorted out, don’t worry.” She darted to Molly’s other side, tugged Yasha’s other arm over her shoulder, and, taking most of her weight, easily steered her over towards the table in the far corner.

Her sketchbook was open on top of it, a mess of different pencils and pieces of charcoal spread over it. Sitting beside that was a small glass of half-finished milk. Apart from that, the bar was empty. Molly glanced at Jester through slightly narrowed eyes, realising she’d stayed awake alone waiting for the two of them to get back, but he said nothing.

Molly watched anxiously, occasionally fetching water or bandages according to Jester’s orders, as the other tiefling used a combination of magic and mundane healing to patch Yasha up and get her looking near-enough human once again. By the time she was done, her tail was drooping, and she looked utterly exhausted.

“There you go,” she said thickly, crawling onto the bench beside Yasha, “Now you won’t die. Today, at least. You’re welcome.”

Yasha smiled a little. She still looked tired, and not entirely present, but decidedly better than she had half an hour ago, when Molly had had to physically drag her off death’s doorstep. “Thank you, Jester,” she said very quietly.

“Mhm,” Jester mumbled thickly.

Then she began to crawl unashamedly into Yasha’s lap. Yasha blinked down at her, clearly too shocked by this to do anything about it, or to protest.

“Now,” Jester said sleepily, “I know you like to disappear all the time and go off and do your Yasha thing,” she informed her, “But please just, just-” She yawned hugely, showing her fangs, “Stay a little longer this time, okay?” She mumbled, patting her absent-mindedly on the head, “Just so I can be sure that you aren’t going to fall apart again. You had a lot of holes in you a minute ago...”

She trailed off, and within seconds, it seemed, was fast asleep, curled up on top of Yasha like a large, blue cat.

Yasha stared at her, then up at Molly, “How does she do that?” she murmured, keeping her voice low so as not to disturb the now lightly snoring Jester. “Fall asleep that way?”

Molly shrugged, smirking, “Tiefling thing,” he said, lightly, waggling his tail irritatingly at her.

Yasha frowned, “No,” she said flatly, “I have watched you fall asleep, before. You talk for an hour about nothing until you are talking to yourself in your dreams. She just-” she shook her head, then, “It’s like something invisible hit her over the head.”

Molly laughed lightly at that, not missing the slightly softened expression that came over Yasha’s face as she looked down at the sleeping tiefling in her lap.

Yawning slightly, he stretched like a cat, his tail going taut momentarily, then he shrugged and dragged a hand through his messy hair, saying, “Those spells take a lot out of her, I guess.”

At this, Yasha frowned slightly, not looking at him, but at Jester, “She should not have exhausted herself like this for me,” she murmured, more to herself than to Molly.

Molly snorted and Yasha looked at him quizzically. “She’d have done it regardless of what you wanted, my dear,” he told her with a small, knowing smile.

Molly had also not failed to notice, as Jester had fussed over Yasha, that he sketchbook lying on the table was full of drawings of the Aasimar woman, not all of them entirely innocent. Their meeting in the bathhouse earlier had apparently made quite an impression.

Yasha didn’t seem to know what to say to that and so, in true Yasha fashion, she simply said something else, instead. “I was supposed to leave today, you know.”

“I do,” Molly said, quietly, watching her with a guarded expression to see how she responded.

“That may be a little more difficult now,” she mused out loud, looking down at Jester again. In her sleep, her long, blue tail had curled absently around Yasha’s calf, as though to anchor herself to her.

“Yes,” Molly said, “I think she might be a little upset if you walk out on her now. Suppose that’s good to know,” he added, thoughtfully, “Should teach you how to behave if you find yourself in her bed at a later date.”

A faint red flush crept into Yasha’s cheeks at that but she said, without looking at Molly, “I don’t know what you are talking about, Mollymauk.”

Molly just smirked, tail flicking lazily from side to side, though he knew better than to try and push the matter.

They sat in silence for another minute, Molly watching Yasha, while her attention seemed consumed by the tiefling curled against her. After a long moment, she tentatively started stroking Jester’s hair in slow, precise movements, drawing it away from her face. She twitched slightly and Yasha paused, then resumed the motions when Jester settled again, nuzzling into her.

“I could stay for one more night,” she murmured absently, still stroking her fingers through Jester’s hair, “To thank her for saving my life. That would seem fair.”

“It would,” Molly agreed, quietly.

They sat quietly for a long while, the crackling of the fire the only sound, as Molly considered his options. Rarely had Yasha agreed to halt or postpone leaving for...Whatever it was that Yasha did when she wasn’t with him, and it had always been in rather dire circumstances, when Molly himself had been a wreck, very much in need of her.

Looking at the almost tender look on Yasha’s face as she gazed down at the sleeping tiefling in her arms, he couldn’t stop himself from saying, “You have to tell her, you know.”

“Tell her what?” Yasha mumbled vaguely, still not looking at him.

“How you feel about her,” Molly said, bluntly.

Yasha looked up at her, apparently shocked by this and Molly sighed, shaking his head. “Subtlety has never been your strong suit, darling,” he told her lightly, “It’s obvious.”

“What is obvious?” Yasha asked, frowning at him.

If it had been anyone else, he would have suspected they were mocking him. But Yasha was Yasha and, well...It was entirely possible she might not have noticed.

“The way you look at her,” Molly said, quietly, “It’s obvious that you like her.”

“I do,” Yasha agreed, unflinchingly, “I like you as well,” she frowned a little, “Should I have said that to you before now? Is that what you mean?”

Molly smiled and tapped Yasha fondly on the leg with the tip of his tail, “No, love,” he said, “Although,” he added, considering the matter, “If you ever feel the urge to tell me how deeply fond of me you are, don’t ever repress it.” He winked at her and Yasha rolled her eyes. “But,” Molly added more gently, “The way you like me, and the way you like her aren’t the same, are they?”

Yasha frowned slightly, but otherwise made no answer, though she was now looking down at Jester with a slightly different expression on her face, as though considering her own feelings for the first time.

“I’m not going to pry,” Molly said, getting to his feet, “And I’m not going to force you into anything, you know me better than that but...If I were you...I’d say something to her.” He stretched again, yawning hugely and said, “We should get some sleep.”

Yasha nodded and, carefully, she got to her feet as well, scooping Jester up easily and taking her with her. Jester stirred, disturbed by Yasha’s movement, and her tail curled tightly and possessively around her waist as she scrunched up her face, clearly displeased. “You’re supposed to stay,” she mumbled thickly, wrapping her arms around Yasha’s broad chest and clinging on like a small blue barnacle, making it clear what she thought of the idea of Yasha leaving.

“I am staying, little one,” Yasha said, gently, “I am just taking you to bed.”

“Ohh,” Jester said, and even half-asleep she managed to smirk and waggle her eyebrows suggestively at Yasha, “I think you’re supposed to flirt a little bit more before we get to that stage, Yasha.” Yasha flushed more darkly than Molly had ever seen her at that, but Jester only smiled and nuzzled into her, “But I will accept this. Come on, let’s go.”

“Jester,” Yasha began, still beet red, “I mean that I am taking you to your bed.”

“If you like,” Jester replied evenly, “I don’t mind whose bed we use.”

Yasha, evidently at a complete loss as to how to respond to this, simply walked towards the stairs instead, looking completely baffled.

As she opened the door to the room she, Jester, and Beau were sharing, Molly heard Jester mumble sleepily, “You’re going to be in the bed with me, though, right? You’re very comfortable, Yasha.”

Yasha hesitated, then, “If that is what you want, then yes, I can stay.”

“Oh good,” Jester hummed happily, nestling in closer to Yasha, eyes closing once more.

Smiling, Molly crept along to his own room and slipped inside, feeling, despite his own near-death and Yasha’s mangling, that tonight had gone rather well, all things considered.

#critical role #jester #yasha #mollymauk tealeaf #yester #jester x yasha #molly x yasha #molly x jester #molly slyly wing-manning jester is my favourite thing EVER #they're so cute i ;-;#yester fic #my fic #prompt fill #luca fills prompts #answered #luca answers #anonymous #ENJOY FRIEND #Anonymous

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some-mad-lunge · 6 years

Text

To Begin Again - Ringsy Fic

This fic is why I love anon requests. I got the request yesterday and this story just poured out of me. I couldn’t stop it. And I’m proud of it. Really proud of it. That’s rare for me so I really hope you like it. And thank you Anon, whoever you are!

It’s a long one. Not explicit but things are implied. Also a little Saskia x Tobias in there because I ship them too.

It doesn’t end the way you would think it would. Though if Ringo was honest he never did think it would end at all. But life had other plans and sometimes it’s not anyone’s fault. It didn’t matter that Ringo wanted someone to blame, there was no one’s feet to lay it upon.

It started slowly. Ringo working more. Late nights at the office. It became less important to respond to the text messages than to just finish up that last document. It was hard enough to find the time but once Easy’s career started to take off it became impossible.

Ringo was happy for Easy, in his element of creativity and surrounded by his passion. Easy was proud of Ringo, how he was rising in the ranks. Both were becoming known in their field, working hard and slowly slipping away from each other.

Because you think you’ll make it up next time. You think tomorrow we’ll do dinner, the movie, the concert, the conversation, the whatever. Then you say it again the next day. They stop their normal breakfast routine. Easy’s out of town so much it’s postponed so many times it’s no longer a thing. A tradition broken that never resumes.

They were close to having to schedule sex because Ringo couldn’t remember the last time they’d had some. Or kissed beyond a peck when they passed in the hall. Or held hands. Or any of it.

The love was still there but that doesn’t matter if everything else is gone.

Ringo wasn’t surprised when Easy came home from two weeks in Paris and they had “the talk.”

Easy simply said, “Is this working?”

Ringo was always honest with Easy. He just hated that in that moment he had to be. He desperately wanted to lie to the man he loved.

“No.”

So they talked and there were some tears. Okay a lot of tears but they were best friends, better to end it now before they lost everything. They spent that last night together. Made love for the first time in over a month. It was beautiful and special and goodbye.

It was impossible at first but work kept them both busy. Their friends were thankful that they were being so adult about it. Tobias was a shoulder for both men to lean on.

It was hard, it took time but they got there. They could be in a group together and laugh. They could run into each other and hug with awkward affection. Sure sometimes Ringo would look at Easy and feel a surge of emotion that overwhelmed him. Sometimes Easy would have to stop himself from reaching for Ringo’s hand and interlacing their fingers. Sometimes Ringo’s thumb would hover over Easy’s number on his phone late at night, his heart begging him to press the call button. Sometimes Easy slept cradling the shirt Ringo had left forgotten in one of Easy’s drawers, it didn’t matter that Ringo’s scent was gone.

Time went on. Ringo would say he loved Easy because he did. He’d accepted he always would. It had to be a first love thing, because Easy was his first real love. He’d heard that never fully went away.

So they weren’t friends but they weren’t enemies and that was something in itself. They could both look back in fondness, void of bitterness and anger. Or at least he hoped they could.

When six months later Ringo found out Easy was dating an underwear model he was fine with it. He was. He wanted Easy to be happy. He just worked harder, and kept his head down.

When Ringo was headhunted by another firm for more money, three times to be exact, he felt vindicated. He bought a better condo than the one he’d previously owned but never lived in. He had his Rhine view. He had his in floor heating. He had his name on a plaque outside his huge corner office. He had everything he worked so hard for.

Now what?

Easy meanwhile took a while longer to move on. When he’d sat across from Ringo and asked him that fatal question he thought he’d hear something different.

Yes things had been hard and there was a distance growing between them then. He thought they could talk it out. He thought they would make a plan. They didn’t. They gave up.

It rubbed Easy the wrong way. It wasn’t just the heartache and the loneliness. It was that he thought they were more than that. They fought against deceit and friends to be together, but time was what killed them in the end?

Easy was thankful that his job took him around the world. He saw new places that had no connection to Ringo. He met new people who didn’t know him as anything other than Ingo Winter.

He was no longer Ingo Dingo to Ringo’s Flamingo. He wasn’t half of anything anymore. He was a whole. Just Easy. It still felt empty.

He’d almost said something to Ringo once when they were riding the elevator together. The first time they’d seen each other in almost 2 months. Easy told Ringo about this Indian restaurant in Japan of all places which would have turned his stomach inside out. He’d laughed when Ringo told him about Kira’s newest boyfriend drama.

They sighed and locked eyes and there was a moment. It was like they were Easy and Ringo again. Like they both remembered what it was to be together, really together. But the doors to the elevator opened and the moment was lost.

That night Easy got a text from a model he’d met at the shoot a few days before, asking him to go out for a drink. He didn’t want to say yes, but he did. Afterwards Easy ended up back at his place. He wanted to get his first time post Ringo over with.

James was gorgeous and British and good in bed. He seemed to find Easy fascinating and fawned all over him. It was nice. It was okay. It was fine.

When he heard Ringo was moving out he didn’t bat an eye. He told Tobias to give him his best and he’d meant it. He wouldn’t be able to attend Ringo’s “going away” party because of a shoot in South Africa. Models wearing bikinis surrounded by giraffes. Easy was more excited to meet the giraffes if he was honest. James picked him up from the airport with a kiss and a hug and that was surprising but not unwelcome.

It got easier when he no longer looked for Ringo in the halls or the elevator or anywhere. He wasn’t going to be there and that’s okay. Well as okay as it was ever going to be.

When Easy heard Ringo was dating a young female accountant it made sense. Ringo deserved to be part of a power couple. Someone should be on Ringo’s arm wearing a power suit and dripping in elegance. Not someone in black jeans and flannel. He hoped they were happy, hoped they sparkled like diamonds together. He really did.

Ringo cared about Alice. She was nice and got his dry sense of humour. Plus she was smart, good with money and numbers. They both spent their evenings tapping away on their laptops. When they went to functions together they shone. Ringo saw the envy on other men’s faces. Weirdly it didn’t feel as good as he expected.

She called him Richard, which at first he liked but now he felt a little like she was scolding him whenever she said his name. But she was beautiful. She never wanted affection. She wasn’t cold, just focused. Sex was to the point. It wasn’t bad but it wasn't amazing. Still she was someone who got Ringo’s life, got his priorities. They could go days without talking and nobody felt deserted. Some days it was lonely but he’d gotten used to that feeling. To be honest it was a feeling he was comfortable with, a feeling he knew all too well.

After a few months it became clear that she was expecting some sort of commitment. Focused as she was she wanted to know where this was going. If they weren’t headed where she wanted she would move on. No muss. No fuss.

Then his brother called with the most amazing news. He’d asked Saskia to marry him and she surprisingly said yes. They were getting married in two weeks. Turned out two days after Tobias proposed Saskia found out she was pregnant. She wanted to be able to fit into her dream dress.

Oh and would Ringo be his joint best man with Easy?

Easy was over the moon for his best friend and Saskia. They were in love for so long before they finally admitted it to themselves and each other. Easy would come home from a night at James’s place to find them gazing at each other or cuddled on the couch with Stinker laying across them. They fit. They made sense.

Tobias was so nervous when Easy helped him pick out the ring. Nervous before they left on their nightly walk with Stinker. He took her to the spot in the park where he’d first kissed her. Tobias said he may have gotten down on one knee before but he knew it this time would be his last.

Tobias had asked if he was okay with Ringo and him both being his best man. Easy loved it. Happy that the brothers were brothers finally, nothing half about it. There was no bachelor party to plan, Tobias feared he’d end up so drunk he’d marry Easy again. No. He just wanted to pledge forever to Saskia. That was all.

So Easy broke it off with James. Sure it meant going dateless to the wedding but it was the right thing to do. He cared for James, liked him but it would never be more than that. He hated that he didn’t feel what he should but maybe with the next one? It was his first relationship post Ringo. There were still kinks to work out. A heart to get back up to snuff.

Ringo was amazed at how quickly they pulled the wedding together. He was thankful that Alice had a planned conference that weekend and was unable to attend. He didn’t ask her to cancel, she wouldn’t have anyway. He needed to make a decision about where they were going. It was time to start looking at rings.

He showed up at the church 10 minutes earlier than was asked of him but he hadn’t walked in yet. The last time he’d walked through those doors he’d been holding Easy’s hand. How things changed. He tapped down the ache in his chest.

It was a slight shock to his heart to see the church empty other than Easy standing at the end of the aisle. He was adjusting some flower arrangements but looked up at the sound of the door. They locked eyes and Easy smiled at him. Ringo knew in that moment he was going to break up with Alice.

Easy wished Ringo didn’t always look so damn handsome in a suit. Okay he looked handsome in everything but the black suit with a slim black tie was a sight to behold. Easy was grateful when Tobias came rushing from the back, vibrating with nerves and excitement, a welcome distraction to both men.

Saskia was a beautiful bride and Tobias sniffled throughout his vows. When they kissed at the end Stinker, the star ring bearer, barked with happiness as the guests clapped and cheered.

Ringo handed Easy his handkerchief, somehow aware that Easy was crying even though he’d had his back to him throughout the whole service.

Photos were taken, Ringo’s speech was a hit and when he finally got a moment to himself he texted Alice it was over. Her response was “Thank you.” No muss. No fuss. What an understatement.

Ringo knew that he’d never have what he had with Easy again. But he wanted something close. Watching the bride and groom and the love, it was evident and real. He had to look. He had to try.

At the end of the night Easy and Ringo were helping Saskia and Tobias into the limo that was taking them to their hotel. Yes they were taking Stinker. They really were a pair, a match made in heaven as they say. They were leaving the next morning, a road trip for a small honeymoon, a nice happy family.

They waved them goodbye and then it was just the two of them. They made stilted small talk as they collected the gifts and envelopes stuffed with money. They carried them up to the apartment, covering the kitchen table with the fruits of a happy union.

Ringo was going to leave, he really was but then he noticed the boxes stacked in one corner. He had to ask.

“Saskia is moving in here, they’re turning my room into a nursery.”

They smiled wistfully at each other, they were both excited to be uncles. To have a child to spoil and hold. Both thinking back to when they’d made plans for a family of their own one day.

“So are you moving in with your boyfriend then?”

Ringo tried to keep the curiosity out of his voice. But he wanted to know if the model was going to get something with Easy that he never did. A real home. A future.

“No I broke it off with him. He was a great guy just not the one you know?”

Ringo just nodded. He felt light on his feet for some reason, rocking back and forth. He should leave, he really should.

Easy didn’t want Ringo to leave. He wanted to stand there and pretend for a little bit longer. It was stupid. It’d almost been a year but after today the next time he saw Ringo he’d probably be married himself. The perfect half of the perfect couple.

“So where are you moving to then?”

That was the question wasn’t it? Easy didn’t know.

“Not sure yet. I’ve got a lot saved and with the money from leasing the kiosk I’m looking to buy. Just not sure where yet.”

“There are some places still available in my building.”

Easy laughed. Really Ringo?

“I’m sure your girlfriend wouldn’t like your ex living a couple floors away Richard.”

There, like that. He wanted someone to say his name like that. To say Richard like they loved the feeling in their mouth. Like it was perfection on their tongue. Like it wasn’t just his name, like it was everything.

“We broke up.”

He heard Easy’s sharp intake of breath.

“I’m sorry.”

“I’m not.”

And again the silence. Ringo should head for the door. Why did he have to leave what he wanted behind? He turned away because he could feel it bubbling up. The love he had for Ingo Winter still, always. He learned today watching his brother that you could be made for one person. He was made for Easy. Why hadn’t that been enough?

Easy rubbed the handkerchief in his pocket. He should give it back. He should remind Ringo he had it. But he wanted another little piece to hang onto. He wanted another reminder that once upon a time he’d had a great love. The greatest love. Why had it ended again? Why hadn’t Easy been enough?

Maybe it was seeing the back of Ringo walking away. Maybe it was because he’d stood beside him at an alter where people declared their undying devotion. Maybe it was the last 11 months of trying to fill the void that Ringo had left behind.

Whatever it was it made him speak the words he swore he’d never say out loud.

“Why did you give up on us?”

He didn’t know what he was expecting but what he got was Ringo whipping around to face him. There were tears on his cheek and heartbreak in his eyes.

“Why did you let me?”

They met halfway, hands cradling each other’s faces. Just gazing. Looking. Remembering. Maybe time hadn’t torn them apart because it was like no time had passed.

“I love you.”

They both whispered it at the same time. Ringo smiled, Easy whimpered. Then their lips met and it was like the world fell into place again.

They ended up breaking a present or two when they pushed everything off the table. It was raw and intense and felt like coming home. Afterwards they made their way to Easy’s bed. It was soft and honest. A new memory that stretched seamlessly into the ones of old. It was them. It fit. It made sense.

Then they stayed up all night. They held each other and had the conversations they should have had 11 months ago. Probably even before that.

Ringo admitted that he would always feel like he wasn’t good enough for Easy. Easy admitted he would always worry he loved Ringo too much, that he smothered him. It all seemed ridiculous now, how they’d let their careers and fears take away the only thing that ever really mattered. Because their success without the other to share it with was nothing to celebrate. Not if they couldn’t celebrate it together.

Easy moved straight from the apartment into Ringo’s condo. He was a big fan of the in floor heating and the view. They both worked less and yet their careers didn’t suffer. When Ringo went to events with Easy on his arm the envy he saw in others filled him with pride. This was his partner Ingo Winter, yes that Ingo Winter, the photographer.

Their friends and family were ecstatic and thankful. They were just happy to have Easy and Ringo back. Turned out everyone had missed the couple because neither man had been himself without the other. Ringo thought he’d hidden it better than that. Easy knew he’d not been able to hide it at all.

Tobias just smiled at them and winked at Saskia. She hugged them both and asked what colour they would paint the new nursery. Seemed redecorating was repayment for broken wedding gifts. They went with a soft purplish gray with white accents. Saskia cried and rubbed her expanding stomach at the unveiling.

“Don’t you just have the best uncles ever?”, she whispered before she started crying all over again.

They eloped, just the two of them. They said their vows on a beach with the sand between their toes and the breeze brushing their faces. They made promises that were just for the two of them. Vowing to never let anything break them apart again. To love and cherish and never give up.

When Ringo held his niece for the first time he thought for sure he was going to drop her. She was so tiny and perfect and thankfully looked like her mother. Tobias was praising his wife, too busy to notice when his brother looked at his husband and whispered something no one ever expected him to say. Well no one except Easy Winter-Beckmann.

“She needs a cousin.”

#ringsy #ringo beckmann #easy winter #eaxy x ringo #ringo x easy #unter uns #uu #fan fic #fan fiction #anon request #saskia weigel #tobias lassner #tobias x saskia #a little sad #a little happy

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imagine-bangtan · 6 years

Text

Attention (ft. Suga)

Request:

A/N: not really rough butttt...

prompt: so i know we haven’t talked in like, two years, and that things ended pretty badly between us but what the fuck do you mean you’re engaged to be married

SMUT WARNING

You peeked into your mailbox, opening it up with a key. Quickly going through the mail, you sighed in relief, seeing that there's no bills to settle just yet. You were so not ready to pay as your paycheck got postponed due to financial issues in the company you worked at.

Ads, ads, more ads. You were flipping the papers around to check if there's anything interesting in the newsletters, when you noticed a white envelope in between, which nearly fell to the floor.

'The fuck is this?' You mumbled to yourself, flipping the envelope around. Your heart nearly stopped once you saw the return address written on the back. 'Min Yoongi.' You couldn't believe your eyes. Haven't heard from him in ages, why would he contact you through mail?

You licked your lips confused and hesitant. Isn't it just weird to receive an envelope from him after so long?

You quickly locked the mailbox and made it home, throwing all of the newsletters on the table along with your bag. Taking a sharp knife, you opened the mysterious envelope up only to see a white, decorated card inside. You could feel your hands trembling a little, while taking it out and plopping yourself on the couch.

'An invitation?' Making sure that you've read it right, you took a look inside to see what's going on.

'TOGETHER WITH THEIR FAMILIES,

WOO SUJIN AND MIN YOONGI

INVITE YOU TO CELEBRATE THEIR MARRIAGE!

SUNDAY, JULY 30TH AT 3PM'

The address was listed down below the text. You've just gotten a wedding invitation from your ex boyfriend. Isn't that sweet of him?

'You've got to be kidding me, you freaking jerk!' You exclaimed, staring at the card in disbelief. You could feel anger building up inside as you read the text once again and again. Unvoluntarily, your thoughts went back to the moment of your break up, which happend around 2 years ago.

'Didn't I tell you not to go out with her? What don't you understand?!' You shouted at him, right when he stepped his foot into your shared apartment.

'Don't yell at me. I've already explained to you that she's just a friend. Aren't you tired of making these lies up?' He responded calmly and passed by you, going straight into the kitchen.

'Lies? You call these lies?! Is this a lie too?!' You threw a piece of paper at him, tears glistening in your eyes. It was a rare view, life taught you to be strong enough to handle these types of situations. You didn't cry when your beloved dog passed away, neither when you didn't make it into the college that you've always dreamed of.

Yoongi picked the sheet of paper up and skimmed thorugh what seemed to be a conversation. Between him and his 'friend'.

'Did you check my messeges?!' Once he realized, he instantly became furious. Most of the times, he was just calm and indifferent, but the thing that he hated the most was inviding his privacy.

'You mad? Your romance is not a secret anymore, what a shame!' You couldn't control yourself, shouting way too loud for your neighbours' liking.

Yoongi tried to grab your arm, but you didn't give him a chance to explain himself. There was nothing to explain actually, you had a proof in black and white. Originally, you've started to get wind of something back a while ago, but it only became obvious when he stopped touching you. Hugs, kisses, cuddles, sex - it all was just memories from when you two were madly in love with each other.

'You fucking cheater, I don't ever want to see you again.' The words were accompanied with a stream of tears, flowing down your cheeks.

'Get out of my house then.' His response was very simple, but created a wound in your heart that couldn't be healed easily.

After what happened, you packed your belongings and moved into your best friend's place, where you lived until able to rent a flat on your own. You haven't contacted him, but thoughts about your past relationship greeted you every morning and put you to sleep each night ever since. You would be able to forgive him, you would take him back with open arms, if only he showed initiative. But he didn't. And here you are, sitting on a couch with the invitation to Min Yoongi's wedding.

Without thinking much, you grabbed your purse and took a cab to the address written on the back of the envelope. It was a stupid idea, but you just had to see him. For this one last time.

Knocking on the door, you had mixed feelings. How is he going to react? He might just shut the door on you - you wouldn't be too surprised if you saw that. You're definitely not letting him do this, though.

'What are you doing here?' You heard his voice and looked up. His face didn't change at all after such a long time. This view made your heart flatter - you obviously still loved him, even after the terrible thing that he did. The only difference that you noticed was his eyes. The bags underneath were clearly visible, which made him look as if he was extremely tired.

'So, I know we haven't talked in like 2 years and that things ended pretty badly between us, but what the fuck do you mean you're engaged to be married?' You stormed by him into the apartment, before he closes the door on you. Once in the hallway, you crossed your arms on your chest and stared at him expectantly.

'I've got all the rights to. What's you problem?' He locked the door and leaned on it, sending you the same look. For a few seconds, the room was filled with silence. 'If you don't want to talk, then you know where the door is.'

Just when he was passing by you, wanting to leave you to yourself, you grabbed his arms and pulled him into a heated kiss. His body shivered, feeling your touch after years of separation, but didn't hesitate to put his hands on your lower back, keeping you close. That was the only sign that you needed. Knowing the apartment way too well, you started to make your way into the bedroom, bumping onto walls and throwing clothes on the floor. Only after a few minutes, your lips were already swollen from hard, wet kisses and occasional biting.

‘You really have guts to come here and turn me on.’ Yoongi whispered these words with a slight smirk. You could notice how his eyes got darker and a bit clouded from lust.

‘I know you like it.’ You answered and pushed him onto the bed, straddling him in just your lingerie. Of course, you didn’t plan on going to bed with your soon to be married ex boyfriend, but it just happened that you put on a really nice piece that day. Yoongi put his hands on your hips, caressing them gently, but with a firm grip.

‘I’m not going anywhere, don’t you worry about that.’ You said on the feeling of how tight he held you.

‘I hope so.’

You bent to kiss his sharp jawline, leaving wet traces all around his skin, making your way to the collarbone. Once you reached it, you began to suck on the sensitive skin passionately. Very soon, a red spot appeared on his body as he groaned in need.

‘God, I have really missed your touch.’ He mumbled under his breath as you were taking care of every inch of his skin, irritating it a little bit, which only kept on making the situation hotter. Your lips eventually touched the material of his boxers. Tugging them with your teeth, you pulled them down, looking at his expression – it was very satisfying to see this much pleasure and desire in his eyes.

You licked your lips and traced a line from the bottom to the top of his manhood with just the tip of your tongue. This feeling was driving him insane and making more, and more impatient. He shivered underneath you, but you kept on teasing him slowly, humming in the process. From sucking on his tip, you went to sucking on his balls, not putting him into your mouth fully – intentionally of course.

‘Just ride me, okay?’ He finally growled, frustrated at how slow you were treating him, obviously getting your revenge.

‘Sure, babe.’ You responded and placed yourself on his hips, not even bothering to take the panties off. You just moved them aside and sensually moaned when he entered you from beneath. The moment that you were basically dreaming of eventually happened. You two became one again.

Your hips started to move up and down, riding him in a nice, fast pace as you bent down to place a heated kiss on his lips. The warmth of his body and pleasure that you were feeling had you breathing heavily already, but it wasn’t enough for Yoongi. He put his arms around you, pushing your body into his, chest in chest. Your nipples instantly became hard even though you were still wearing a lacy bralette. He started to thrust into you, really hardly, filling the room with sounds of skin clapping against each other’s.

‘Yes! Ah!’ You breathed out in his ear, clenching your hands on the sheets. The feeling of pure bliss had you weak, like a little doll in Yoongi’s arms. Your limbs went numb from pleasure. The fact that you haven’t even talked to each other in two years really turned you on, to the point that you couldn’t stop yourself from clenching around his manhood, while moaning his name. The hot sensation in your abdomen started to grow rapidly. You knew Yoongi was feeling the same exact way as his thrusts became more aggressive and sloppy, meanwhile his breath became very uneven.

‘This feels so good…’ You whimpered losing control over your body. With a loud moan, you came, soaking him as well as the bed in juices. Yoongi’s breath hitched feeling this hot liquid and he barely managed to pull out before coming all over your panties.

Seems like you two were in shock after such intense orgasms, lying in each other’s arms in silence. You opened your eyes and looked at him, only to see him staring back at you.

‘It was a set-up, you know?’ He laughed saying these words. Your brows furrowed in confusion and a slight anger as well.

‘What do you mean?’

‘I’m not getting married. I figured you’ll get jealous, hence I’ll have a chance to get you back.’

He received exactly three punches in the chest from the suddenly grumpy you.

‘You’re a jerk.’ You said, but hugged him tightly.

‘I know I am. But it worked, so I don’t mind it.’

#suga #bts #bts suga #suga smut #bts imagine #smut #engagement #marriage #breakup #break-up #fanfiction

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aseriesofthrills · 3 years

Text

Suzie Is Back

Suzie is back, and so are long, overly emotional, rambling posts.

I matched with Suzie mid-October 2020. Caileigh and I had broken up earlier that summer after 3.5 years together, and my plan was to take some time off dating to “figure myself out.” Caileigh was the first person I ever dated, so I thought being single and out at the same time - for the first time - was a necessary step in figuring out my identity as an individual. Well, I’m not sure if you’re aware, but there’s this big thing called a Global Pandemic going on that’s forcing us all to choose between our physical health and a social life. Put simply, I was lonelier than America’s Dad Tom Hanks on a deserted island before he found Wilson. Or maybe even lonelier than America’s Dad Tom Hanks after he struck up a friendship with Wilson, because after all, Wilson was a volleyball. I wanted to find my Wilson.

And boy did I find a lot of Wilsons. Unfortunately for me, I found a lot of off-brand Wilsons that were the wrong color, didn’t hold air well, or came out of the box with fabric missing. This is not to say these Wilsons are undesirable. I’m sure any of them would provide solid companionship to the next unfortunate soul whose fallen plane renders them a castaway. They were just not for me.

There was Emily, someone who I had strong feelings for and made me realize I’d really like to date someone who’s also Jewish. I was wowed by her philanthropic agenda of making candles and donating half the proceeds, until she did a very gay thing™ and got back with her ex, which was when I began to wish I instead had simply donated that $100 directly to charity and didn’t have to stare at her Tender Flame (more like Tinder Flame, amirite) candles sprinkled around my house. Looking back, we really were not compatible. Emily taught me that just because you have good banter with someone and a shared belief system, it doesn’t mean you wont clink teeth when you make out for the first time. It might even mean she will be extremely silent while you go down on her for what feels like hours, then not reciprocate because she is… probably thinking about getting back with her ex.

Then there was MK, someone who I’d actually met once before at a Hollywood Ladies Drinks Night Before The World Shut Down We Used To Have It So Good Oh My God. I remember wondering that night if she might be queer, but my gaydar couldn’t figure her out and I was in a relationship so it was a moot point anyway. I was hesitant to send her a “like” on Hinge because what if she didn’t feel the same way and then I ran into her at a work thing in 2023 and she KNOWS I liked HER but we BOTH know SHE didn’t like me BACK and -

It took me 3 seconds to get over that existential crisis because I remembered that thousands of people were dying every day and nothing actually mattered. So I liked one of her photos, and she matched with me in literally 4 minutes. I normally like to talk to someone for at least a few weeks - pandemic or not - before meeting in person, but she almost immediately suggested getting together the following weekend. Maybe that’s just her, or maybe she felt confident that I’m most likely not a serial killer since we have mutual friends, but she went for it and I agreed because I hadn’t yet figured out how to assert my own boundaries. But also, why not. It was just a picnic.

It was not just a picnic. It was a picnic conveniently a few blocks from her apartment. It was a picnic and then it was dinner and sex. I enjoyed spending time together at first, but the more we talked and hung out the more my feelings dissipated. In the middle stretch I thought for a second that I had perhaps cracked the mythical Friends With Benefits code, but after a few more dates I realized the code was far more complicated than I’d originally anticipated and what I thought was the treasure map key was actually just meaningless hieroglyphics and OK I will stop this metaphor now. It was time to take the high road and be honest, which for me manifested in telling her I was going to quarantine the next 2 weeks before flying home so this would be the last time I saw her before 2021 and we should check in when we’re back in LA in January - and then I texted her once I got to Florida to say lets just be friends. Not my proudest moment, but we’re learning.

There were a few other short-lived dalliances, but we all have places to go and people to see (from a distance). Just know I somehow managed to make the Pandemic Year my own personal Slut Year. And we’re using the term slut lovingly, simply to describe that 2020 was the year I managed to sleep with more people than any year prior. Tell me I can’t do something, then watch me work.

If you pay attention to detail, as I’m sure my 2 consistent followers do, you’ll remember Suzie and I matched mid-October which was in the midst of my MK chronicles. I am not exaggerating when I say that I was lovestruck by Suzie just from her Hinge profile and pictures. I don’t mean like, “Oh, she’s pretty, I hope she likes me back.” I mean like, something happened to my brain immediately that can only be described as some version of virtual pheromones invading my bloodstream. It felt uncontrollable and biological. And if we learned anything from Dr. Fauci this year, it’s that science knows best. The first real conversation we had - meaning that sweet sweet moment someone on a dating app finally admits that they, too, were looking at the app at the very same moment you messaged them - felt engaging and electric and right. At the end of the conversation I gave her my number and she immediately texted me “Talk to you tomorrow *kissy emoji*,” which probably made me precum.

What ensued was months of talking every day. I’ll drone on for paragraphs if I let myself, so I’m not going to let myself. I’ll just say for a while it felt amazing. I liked her so deeply. It took us a good stretch of time before we broached the subject of seeing each other in person, but then a combination of her horrific time management skills (her words), a potential Covid exposure, and a highly contentious presidential election got in the way and lead us down a windy path ultimately culminating in a Zoom first date… a week and a half before I was supposed to fly home for 2 months. The Zoom date was everything I hoped it would be and more. I’d never felt more sad to click “End Meeting For All” but was too giddy to notice. She asked me about my holiday plans, so I told her about my impending travel, and then she more or less said we should have sex before I go. So we did. And it was the best sex of my life. And then I left the state of California, our mutual residence, for 2 months.

Things were somewhat fine at first - we were still talking every day, with a few more Zooms sprinkled in - but then she went home to New Jersey, and suddenly we weren’t talking every day. It was more like every 3-4 days and rarely in actual conversational form. It was more like me waiting for her to reply, then waiting to respond since she’d waited so long, then we’d do it all over again. I felt anxious and tortured and dejected and had no appetite and my mom asked me on more than one occasion if I was ok. I was not ok. But I told myself to bE cHiLL, something that is often diametrically opposed to my natural state of being. I reminded myself that, despite the fact that we had spoken every day for 2 months - which is practically one step away from engagement in LesbianLand - we had only had one in-person date. I was careful to not make It seem more serious than It was, so instead I workshopped a lot of dramatic WHAT ARE WE? texts that I sent to all of my friends and never to Suzie.

We had mutually agreed upon “See you in January,” so I told myself I’d just ask her to hang out when we got back. Then she postponed her flight to LA for 2 more weeks because our Covid numbers were at a scary peak, the worst it had been since the beginning of the Pandemi Lovato. Finally she told me she’d rebooked her flight for the 15th, and I optimistically thought to myself, “You simply don’t tell someone the exact day you’re getting back into town if you don’t plan on seeing them! Right?” Wrong. I shot my shot, and she shot me down. She replied with a long series of texts explaining that her mental health wasn’t in a good place, and she couldn’t be accountable for communicating effectively. She sprinkled in some compliments for good measure, making sure to take a pit stop in “I think you are so wonderful so please don’t think this has anything to do with you” Town, which was reassuring but did not override my brain’s instinct to rethink everything I’d done and said the past few months. But I felt connected to her on a human level, and I didn’t want to lose that simply because she didn’t want to bump butts anymore, so I suggested we be friends and she enthusiastically agreed. End of conversation.

Until later that night, when she texted me Greetings after landing at LAX. I was confused, but I assumed that just meant she was taking me at my word, and this friendship started n.o.w. What followed was some of the most perplexing behavior I’ve witnessed as a living person and hands down the most confounding I’ve ever experienced in my dating career. She’d text me about a new vibrator she bought, or send me a song link then simply “heart” my response and be done with the exchange. It felt like she was just reminding me she existed, as if my small brain could forget. Sometimes she’d ask me how I was doing and we’d have semblances of a real friendship, but other times she’d tell me that I’m SO HOT or send me DMs of a sexy Phoebe Bridgers photo or a Normal People instagram post of Connell telling Marianne she’s pretty. Somewhere in the middle of all that my patient friend Caroline finally hit me with some tough love and told me I needed to block Suzie’s number and hide her on social media. For all intents and purposes, Suzie couldn’t exist anymore. Caroline was right, but I couldn’t do it, so I compromised that for the next week I wouldn’t reach out to Suzie first. Caroline told me “Alcoholics have to quit cold turkey, they don’t get to say well I drink on the weekends” but I decided I was simply not able to do anything more drastic than not text this freshly 25 year old girl who was slowly unraveling my emotional stability first for a week.

You will not believe this but I survived the week and actually felt better, so I did it again the next week. And the next. And the next. Until it had been a month and I hadn’t reached out to Suzie first. She was still texting and DMing me, but I felt my feelings finally waning! Gone were the days of finding her high school ex-boyfriend’s blog in the depths of the internet or looking her up on Venmo to see who she’d gotten Chipotle with the night before. I absolutely still liked her - those fucking pheromones are relentless - but it felt less fresh, so I started to formulate a plan. Once I felt FULLY (lol) over her, I’d text her the next time I was horny. Best case scenario she’d come over, worst case scenario she’d be so disgusted or insulted that she’d never want to talk to me again and I’d actually get over her, not pretend-get-over-her-so-I-could-trick-myself-into-safely-bootycalling-her. But then she sent me potentially the most flirtatious message yet, and I took my opening at 12:53p on a Wednesday and simply said “when are you going to fuck me.” She fucked me that Saturday night.

So. Suzie is back, and Saturday night (and Sunday morning, *wink* she slept over) was great. But now it’s terrible, horrible, no good, very bad again, to borrow some words from Judith Viorst.

How we left things this time is that she does want to see me again, but it can’t be a talk-everyday-thing because she’s ~bUsY* and moving to NYC this summer anyway for grad school (did I forget to mention that? Oops!) and for whatever other reasons that exist that are preventing her from being obsessed with me. She asked what my boundaries and needs are too, and both her actions and words that night really felt clear that she still liked me. I asked if she thought she’d ever see me again. There are some things you really can only ask while cuddling post-sex, and that’s one of them. She paused and said yes. She explained the context around her poor communication and that she never wanted to stop talking to or seeing me, and the way she was holding me felt like she was feeling just as connected to me as I was to her. You can tell when someone just isn’t there with you, and this was not that. We were both right there.

But we were also right back to there being a power imbalance between us. There’s no escaping the fact that this is really on her terms in its present configuration. Our best plan was to promise to be honest moving forward, which felt like it had a lot of potential at the time, but it turns out being honest is hard. Things sort of reverted back to how they were, except with all of my feelings and expectations that I’d worked hard to push down rushing back to take their place on the frontlines of my brain.

It’s been almost 2 weeks, and we’ve talked a few times every 2-4 days. I’m fighting the urge to memorialize exactly what’s transpired, but there’s simply no use in holding onto the details. What finally made all of these not-at-all latent emotions bubble up to the surface and inspired this Intense Feelings Word Vomit is two pronged. First, because I love to torture myself, sometimes I look at Suzie’s Hinge profile to see if she’s changed anything. For some reason, if it stays the same, I feel safe that she’s not seeking out anyone else but me. Which is somewhat logical but also farcical in this particular situation, and I fully understand that. I guess I was really wanting to invite some pain into my life tonight, because even after she texted me yesterday and then proceeded to stretch a very short conversation into something that still is in limbo, I decided it would be fruitful to check her Hinge profile. I’m here to report that all 3 of her prompt questions & answers were different. And readers, I had previously checked it recently enough to know this was a very fresh edit.

The second thing that pushed my feelings over the top, out of my mouth, and directly onto my keyboard is that when she finally texted me back at like 11:30pm, she seemed to entirely brush over two clear attempts, in my opinion, at relaying that I’d like to see her again. And that feels not good. My instinct is to tell myself that maybe my comments weren’t as overt as I first believed them to be, but I think that’s a thinly veiled excuse and a defense mechanism. If someone wants to see you, they will.

I’m almost certain (I am certain) all of my friends - ALL of them! I have A LOT! - are up to their eyeballs in Suzie-flavored-shit, so before writing this I must admit I did the loneliest thing of all: instead of being honest and sharing my feelings directly with her, I texted them… to myself. Raw, unedited emotions that I hope to never re-read one day but probably will and when I do I sure hope I’m in a healthier place and can laugh about it and think about How Far I’ve Come.

The truth is, I’m sitting here all over again picturing the dates I could take her on (the Carlsbad Flower Fields), what restaurants she should experience before leaving LA (Pace), and what fun at-home activities I could plan for us before the world fully returns to a post-Covid society (the DIY pottery kit I bought for myself, fully aware she loves to make clay art). Dare I admit I even daydream about the cross-country road trip that I’ll offer to accompany her on when she moves back East. I look at the contents in my fridge and think, “Maybe I wont use that ingredient tonight in case I need it to make us dinner next time she comes over.” I was ready to plan trying to get vaccinated this weekend around her availability, which is actually insane. You look up simp in the dictionary, and there I am. I took the crumb she gave me and turned it into a huge fucking Mrs. Fields birthday cookie cake that serves 20. No wonder I feel sick.

Unless I’m entirely miscalculating, which I can safely say I am not, Suzie is not sitting in her home thinking the same about me. I think she does like me - I have to allow myself to believe she does, because she said she does, and if I don’t believe it now I never will - but I also have to admit that 6 months into this game of Suzie Mental Gymnastics, I can recognize that all signs are pointing directly to the fact that I like her far more than she likes me. I don’t say that as a form of self-flagellation; it’s just a fact that I need to finally accept. Not just accept, but also let go of the possibility that it’s going to change. That’s the hardest part. I naively thought we were getting back on the ride again, and I buckled up for what turned out to be just a detour.

It can feel nearly impossible to pull yourself away from someone, especially when it feels like their claws are deeply embedded in your brain and your heart. That sounds wildly dramatic, but it is genuinely how I feel. What’s doubly hard is being able to trust my own instincts. I can get attached very quickly, and then it’s almost indecipherable whether someone is actually mistreating me or if my unrealistic expectations don’t allow the other person a chance to actually meet them. This whole essay could potentially be described as an overreaction, but the more I think about it, the more confident I feel in the validity of my feelings. Even if part of the issue is setting my expectations too high, the bigger issue is how I’m being treated. Suzie and I did agree on a low-pressure situation, but it doesn’t take much more than the bare minimum effort to consider another person’s feelings. And I don’t think my feelings are being considered all too much.

Not that Suzie ever really left my life in a real way, but I’m starting to think she came “back” for me to get a second chance at prioritizing my boundaries, my feelings, myself. I don’t want to overreact and call a party foul too soon, but perhaps I need to readjust my idea of what constitutes too soon. After all, maybe it was a mistake to not have asked for clarity sooner the first time. It would have probably allowed me to enjoy my time at home with family more and saved my brain a heck of a lot of overtime I am still saving up to pay. A not-no doesn’t mean a yes, and waiting does not change the outcome. It’s a natural reaction to hold on tighter to someone while loosening your grip on your own needs when you feel them pulling away, but it’s often something you can’t stop from happening. And that’s a tough pill to swallow. Sometimes you have to assert your needs when they’re not being met and watch things fall apart, not because you have those needs but in spite of them. You start again. I will start again.

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ugh-supersoldiers · 7 years

Text

1+1=3 Part 2

MASTERLIST

Part one

Characters: Steve x reader, Bucky Barnes

Summary: Having a baby is supposed to be the most wonderful thing in the world, and now that you and Steve are ready to try, you’re on top of the world. But for some reason things aren’t going according to plan...

Warnings: sad!reader, swearing, some angst but like nah, fluff ending, budding dad!steve (is that even a warning?), SUPPORTIVE!BUCKY OMG, bad editting (sorry it’s late and I’m tired asf)

Words: 4040

A/N: So after multiple requests for a pt 2 of this one, it’s finally here! Sorry it took so long btw I’m prepping for college and ngl I’m super stressed

You sat patiently in a treatment room in the doctors office with your husband, Steve. After the night at the Barton’s where you decided you’d try for children, you both decided that the best course of action would be to get all of your ducks in a row, to make sure that everything checked out with you on a medical stand point.

You’d gone through all of the medical history lists, had the physical exams, discussed lifestyle choices, done the blood, urine and god knows how many other tests.

Your practitioner had never met your husband before, and was utterly shocked to see Captain America accompanying you into the exam room. He was starstruck it seemed, and ordered a rush on all of the tests especially for you.

Steve was worried that a resulting baby from him might inherit some of his preserum illnesses, but the doctor assured you that since the serum physically changed his DNA, it would be impossible.

So you waited for the results of your tests, now out of the hospital gown and back in a soft cashmere sweater with Steve’s hand in yours, brushing his thumb over your knuckles.

“What if something’s wrong with me?” You asked, avoiding his gaze.

Steve knew how nervous you were that there might be some kind of issue with your body, something that could prevent you from getting pregnant or, heaven forbid, cause complications during the pregnancy.

“Hey, don’t think like that.” He knelt in front of your chair and tilted your chin so you’d look at him, “You’re perfect, there’s nothing wrong with you.”

You tried to hold back tears, and Steve was quick to wipe the few that fell down your cheeks. You were so scared that even the thought of something being wrong made you sick to your stomach. You’d wanted this for so long, and now Steve was taking a leave from the Avengers just so you could start a family, the mere idea of it not happening made you shake with fear.

A knock at the door caused Steve to stand up and greet the doctor with a smile.

“Mr. and Mrs. Rogers, the results from your testing is back now.” He said, setting the files down on the table.

“And?” You asked.

“Blood looks good, surface physical checks out, internal exam is good, and based on what I’ve heard about your medical history and lifestyle, you should be ready to go.”

You’d never been so relieved in your life.“So there’s nothing wrong?” You asked.

“Everything is just right.” He smiled before exiting the room.

Steve’s hand rested on your back as you stared at the cabinet in front of you, all of your worrying fading away.

“What did I tell you?” He asked.

You stood and hugged him tightly around the waist, pressing your face into his chest.

“Whoa.” He said with a small laugh, rubbing your back and resting his chin on your head.

“Let’s go home.” You said into his shirt and he agreed with you.

In the car, you couldn’t wipe the smile off of your face. All of your dreams of having children were going to come true with the green light you’d gotten from the doctor. You let out a sigh from the passenger’s seat and Steve looked over at you with a smile.

“You know, we could get started right away.”

You turned to him with an amused grin on your face, “What are you insinuating?”

“Well, I mean we should be making sure we’re giving it our all, right? I’m just suggesting that we should start the process as soon as possible. Like right when we walk in the door.”

You bit your lip to keep a giggle from escaping, “Whatever you say, captain.”

For the next few months you and Steve were at it every spare second of the day. There was a stretch of about 36 hours where you only left the bedroom to eat of use the bathroom. Needless to say, you both enjoyed the ‘process’ a little too much, but you were looking forward to the end of it, when you were holding a positive pregnancy test in your hands.

It didn’t happen the first month, but you weren’t fazed, you knew that it was all about timing and that it was common for it to take a month or two. By the second, you were feeling a little less enthusiastic about your period’s arrival, but still remained hopeful. By the third, you were discouraged more than starry eyes and dreaming. By the fourth month, you burst into tears. By the fifth, Steve had to hold you while you cried into his arms for hours.

How could this have happened? You’d done everything right, you’d read the books, you’d done prenatal care, you’d been through every test that was recommended, for God’s sake you’d even tried the most obscure positions with Steve that were supposed to ‘stimulate conception’.

“I don’t understand.” You wailed, throwing the negative pregnancy test in your hand onto the floor as Steve practically dragged you onto the bed to sit down.

“We’ve done everything, Steve, everything!” Tear flowed down your cheeks at an uncontrollable rate.

“I know we have darling, I know.” He whispered, pulling you down onto his chest and holding you tightly.“Why won’t it just happen?” You pleaded, nuzzling into him for comfort.

“It will, I promise.” You couldn’t respond, your throat chocked up so tightly that you could only let out a sob before another wave of tears hit you.Steve cradled you tightly and kissed your forehead, and even though you didn’t see it, he shed a few tears too.

You woke with a feeling of guilt deep in the pit of your stomach and reached over to feel for Steve’s side of the bed, disappointed when you found it empty.

You sat up, pulling the covers off of your body and rubbing the sleep out of your eyes. Getting up, you glanced at yourself in the mirror. Your puffy eyes were a testament to how well you slept, the grimace on your brow far from a poker face.

You were miserable, plain and simple.

You thought that having the ‘baby’ talk with Steve would be the hard part, but now you were faced with a whole new challenge. You felt like a failure, a massive disappointment. Your body wasn’t allowing you to do the one thing that a woman’s body should do, and your husband had taken a backseat from his job saving the world just to do this.

“Fuck.” You whispered, combing a hand through your disheveled hair.

What have I done to deserve this?

“Hey.” You turned around to see Steve standing in the doorway, a sad smile on his face.

“Hi.” You whispered back, avoiding his gaze.

“(Y/N)-” He began, but stopped when he saw you shaking your head.

“I don’t want to talk about it right now, okay?” You said, trying to keep yourself composed.

“I know,” He said, “I know, darling, I was actually just going to ask you if you wanted to try again?”

You felt sorrow invade you again, and you looked at him with a sadness in your eyes that he had never seen from you.

“What’s the point?”

Your words shattered him.

“What do you mean what’s the point?” He asked, marching over to you and grabbing you by the shoulders, “The point is that you and I are going to have a baby. That’s that, I don’t care how long it takes us, (Y/N). You’ve been wanting this for so long, and dammit so have I.” His eyes were searching yours for any hint of understanding, any tell at agreement.

You looked at him in bewilderment, his speech was so out of the ordinary for him. He rarely ever got this intense with you about something, so to have the scale tip like it had was something to be admired.

“I-I don’t know, Steve,” You whispered, “Maybe it’s just not meant to happen.”

“Don’t do that.” He said firmly, “Don’t you dare do that.”

“I’m trying to be realistic.”

“What’s being realistic ever gotten anyone? All being ‘realistic’ did for me was postpone the wonderful family that I could’ve had with my wife years ago.” His voice was shaking, “And I’m not going to wait a single second longer than I need to in order to give you what I know you’ve wanted for ages, (Y/N), I just won’t.”

You reached up to place your palm on his cheek, he let out a sigh of relief at your touch, leaning into your hand gently.

“Alright.” You said.

It now marked month six, and your hands were shaking as you set the two pregnancy tests side beside on the counter.

Steve was at the compound going through the latest mission’s paperwork with the team, so you figured now would be a good time to take yet another pregnancy test.

When the first one came out positive you had to tell yourself that it could be a false positive, it could be a mistake, so you did another one just to be sure. Now, you stared anxiously at the wall waiting for the alarm on your phone to go off. It felt like trying to watch paint dry.

The harsh ding made you jump, and you ran to fetch the test from the top of the sink. You wrapped your hand around it, pressing it your chest for a moment and reminding yourself to not get your hopes up.

You took a deep breath and opened your hand to see a plus sign etched into the test.

It fell from your hands onto the floor with a soft clank, and you looked at the other test again to make sure you hadn’t grabbed the wrong one. Two plus signs, each test telling you the news that you’d been dying to hear. You were pregnant.

You sprang up to grab your phone, frantically dialing Bucky’s number.

“(Y/N)?” He answered, obviously unsure of why you’d be calling him.

“Buck!” You replied, unsure of what to even say to your husband’s best friend.

“Everything okay?” He asked.

“Yes- No! Uh, sort of?”

“Here, I’ll put Steve on the ph-”

“NO!” You shouted and you could tell he had to pull his ear away from the phone at your volume, “Not yet. Are you alone?”

“I can be. (Y/N), are you feeling alright?”

“God, I am so much better than alright.” You said, tears pooling in your eyes.

“Wait a second does that mean-”

“Shhh!” You said, “If you’re not alone don’t say it out loud, numskull!”

“Sorry, sorry!” You heard a door click closed behind him, “Okay, alone.”

“I’m pregnant.”

There was silence on the other end until he piped up, “(Y/N), this is amazing.”

“Thank you. God, I know, it’s perfect.”

“He doesn’t know yet does he?” Bucky snickered.

“No, no he doesn’t. I’ll surprise him when he gets home, but I had to tell someone.” You said a giggle escaping your lips.

“So you called me?” He asked, clearly complimented.

“Of course I called you, you’re family.”

“Well now you’ve got me blushing.”

“Now keep your mouth shut until I tell Steve myself or I’ll poison your morning coffee.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Thank you for picking up.”

“Of course, (Y/N/N).”

“Love you, sweetiepie!”

With a groan at your embarrassing nickname he choked out an awkward and quick, “Iloveyoutoobye.”

You laughed when the line clicked into silence, and returned to the positive tests on the floor and sink. You let out a sigh, one of relief and of fulfillment.

It had all felt like a dream. Now in your second trimester, you and Steve were making preparations for the nursery.

“Steve!” You called out, your protruding belly making you waddle forward to the end of the stairs.

“Yes?” He popped his head out of the bathroom, a toothbrush hanging from his mouth.

“Would you mind throwing the kettle on for some tea?” You questioned him as you examined the rather confusing looking instructions for the pile of wood and screws that was supposedly going to become a crib at some point.

A knock at the door broke into Steve’s reply, so you padded to the front of your flat.

Opening up the door, you saw the smiling face of Bucky Barnes in front of you with a tray of coffee cups in one hand and a paper bag in the other.

“Buck!” You said happily.

“Hey, (Y/N),” He smiled, “You guys are probably super busy with the nursery today, but I wanted to drop you off something to eat.”

You thanked him and took the tray out of his hand, inviting him into your home with a large grin on your face.

“I got you some green tea, I read that drinking caffeine when you’re pregnant can dehydrate you.” Bucky said, shrugging his shoulders.

A huge grin spread across your face at his thoughtfulness, and you pulled him into a tight hug.

Taken aback by your affection, Bucky hesitated but recovered and put his arms around you.

“You’re the sweetest.” You said, giving him a quick kiss on the cheek.

“Well now I’m red in the face.” He laughed.

“(Y/N), who was at the- Oh, hey Bucky.” Steve smiled at his best friend.

“Bucky brought us breakfast.” You said.

“You’re goin’ soft, pal.” Steve chuckled.

“C’mon, punk, (Y/N) is pregnant with my best friend’s baby, the least I can do for you guys is bring over breakfast.”

“Soft.” Steve teased, and you hit his arm.

“Thought of who the godparents are gonna be?” Bucky asked as he reached for one of the three cups and took a sip.

“Yes, actually.” You said, smiling at Steve.

“Yeah?” Bucky asked, nodding at you to continue.

“Well, the choice is sort of obvious.” Steve said happily and Bucky gave him a slightly confused look.

“What do you mean?”

“It’s you, Bucky.”

His eyebrows raised in disbelief at your words as he set his cup down. His head tilted to the side slightly as his mouth hung agape in shock. Bucky’s eyes sparkled with a look you hadn’t ever seen from him before.

“Are you serious?” He asked.

“Of course we are.” Steve said.

Bucky looked down as a grin invaded his face, you watched as he tried to contain the few tears that had collected in his eyes.

“Oh, Buck.” You laughed, wrapping him in another hug, “We love you a lot, you know, and so will the baby.”

He let out a watery laugh, “I know.” He said.

You felt a small shift in your tummy, and you knew exactly what it was upon the sensation.

“They’re kicking!” You said.

You reached forward and grabbed Bucky’s right hand, placing it gently on your belly so he could feel the baby’s movements. You had never seen the ex assassin so shocked in your life, his eyes wide as saucers as he stared at his hand on your stomach.

“Wow...” He mumbled.

“I think they like you already.” You smiled at him.

Bucky was quick to let the two of you get back at the nursery preparations, explaining he only wanted to drop off breakfast and coffee, he never intended to be involved in a sob fest.

When you’d consumed the bagels that Bucky had purchased, you and Steve ventured back into the soon to be nursery and began the assembly of the crib.

Sleeping wasn’t fun when you were nearly at full term. Your belly barely let you walk around with your swollen ankles and feet, and sleep was a whole other issue. Any position felt less comfortable then the last.

34 weeks, that’s how long you’d been carrying the baby for. You could hardly believe you’d be full term in less than a month.

You and Steve had decided that you didn’t want to know the sex of the baby, figuring it would be more exciting to wait until your bundle of joy was delivered to find out. It was the classic “we don’t care as long as they’re healthy” sort of cliche.

You were lying away in bed, watching Steve sleep peacefully beside you, a protective hand placed on your tummy. You rubbed him arm gently, a sigh passing your lips as you longed for the blissful pull of sleep that Steve must be in, but you knew it wouldn’t come, not at least for a few more weeks.

It wasn’t until you felt a sharp pain in your abdomen that you realized you might get it sooner than you thought.

“Steve.” You croaked, sitting up and groaning.

He moaned out something under his breath, not fulling understanding what was happening.

“Steve.” You called again, this time he shifted, “Baby.” You said as another hit of pain came to you.

“I’m right here, darling.”

“No, I mean baby.” You nearly screamed the last word as a shock of another huge wave hit you.

Steve nearly shot out of bed at your words, going from relaxed husband Steve to Captain America in about a second flat.

He picked you up out of bed, your nightgown clinging to you as he raced you to the car, placing you in the passengers side as he hoped in and sped down the road to the nearest hospital.

Everything was a blur, you could barely make out the things going on around you. You were put into a hospital gown, and ushered into the delivery room right away.

Steve made a few phone calls and then came to be right by your side, doctors coming in to check on your contractions and your dilation. With every passing wave of pain, you felt the urge to pass out becoming stronger and stronger.

You asked about an epidural, but were informed that you were fully dilated at this point.

“Looks like it’s gonna have to be natural.” You laughed dryly as sweat clung to your forehead.

“You can do this.” Steve said, kissing your head.

The doctor, who’s name you had absolutely forgotten by this point, got into position as nurses crowded around, waiting for their next move.

“Alright, (Y/N), we’re going to start pushing now.” He said calmly.

You nodded your head, trying to ignore the burning pain you knew you were about to feel.

“On three, alright?” The doctor asked, “One, two, three.”

The scream that ripped through your throat as you pushed must’ve deafened everyone in the room, but you couldn’t have cared less.

“Good, that’s really good.” The doctor said.

Steve held your hand tightly, trying to whisper encouragement into your ear in between pushes.

“I need one more really big push.” The doctor told you, instructing the nurses to prepare themselves.

A string of rather impressive curses left your mouth as you pushed as hard as you could. Relief flooded you when you felt something give.

Piercing, sharp cries entered the room as you heard the sound of your baby for the very first time.

“It’s a boy.” The doctor said, “Would you like to cut the cord?” He then asked, looking at Steve.

You watched as your husband’s hand left your firm grip, walking over to the end of the table.

Steve had always stepped up to the plate of fatherhood, and you knew that this was a rite of passage, a way for him to feel like he was really doing something.

His eyes couldn’t leave the newborn, his baby, his son. And as he physically detached him from you directly, he knew that he would do absolutely anything for the baby that the nurses were attending to.

“A boy.” You mumbled as he made his way back to you, “Steve we had a boy.”

Tears filled your eyes as they wrapped him up and brought him back to you, assuring you that he was healthy as they placed him in your arms.

You eyes were glued to the infant in front of you, his mouth opening as more cried entered your ears. You had never felt love like this for anything.

“Oh, Steve.” You whispered.

His reply was a kiss on your cheek as tears fell down your face.

“He’s perfect.” Steve said.

“Would you like to hold him?” You asked.

Steve was hesitant, but knew he wanted to hold his boy more than anything in the world, so you passed him over.

Holding him in his arms for the first time was the most beautiful thing Steve had ever experienced, and the most beautiful thing you’d ever seen.

He’d started to cry now, the sight of his son in front of him being too much to bear, but he found such joy in the overwhelming nature of it all.

When Bucky had gotten the call from Steve saying that you were in labor, he nearly tripped over his own feet trying to get out the door. He sped all the way there, not caring if he got a ticket, and once he arrived waited patiently in the waiting room.

When the nurse came out telling him that you and Steve were inviting him in, he felt the colour drain from his face, but he walked into the room just the same.

He stepped in, his heart stopping at the scene in front of him. You were holding a baby in your arms, Steve sitting in a chair beside you, his arms around you and the baby.

“Bucky.” You breathed out.

“Hey.” He croaked.

“Come on.” Steve urged with a nod of his head, “You gotta meet your godchild after all.”

Bucky walked over to you and looked at the infant in your arms, smiling down at the boy happily. He’d stopped crying, a blissful expression of sleep now adorned on his brow. There was a tuff of blonde hair sticking out from his cap, his long eyelashes closed over his eyes. He looked so much like Steve.

“He’s beautiful.” Bucky whispered, “Does he have a name yet?”

You and Steve exchanged a knowing look, then you shifted your gaze back to Bucky.

“He does.” You said.

“Are you gonna tell me, or just leave me hangin’?” Bucky laughed.

“His name is James.”

Bucky’s heart jumped into his throat. His best friend and his wife had named the child they’d brought into the world after him.

He looked at Steve with an expression of disbelief.

“Hey, don’t look at me, it was (Y/N)’s idea.”

“(Y/N)...” Bucky whispered, looking at you briefly, then letting his eyes trail down to the baby again.

“You’re an amazing person, Bucky. I wanted this little guy to know that he was named after the single strongest human being I’ve ever met.” You told him honestly.

Steve smiled at Bucky happily, and all Bucky could do was thank you both for choosing him like this. He left the room with a grin that wouldn’t leave his face for weeks.

Still holding James in your arms, you sighed, a wave of exhaustion washing over you completely.

“You did so well.” Steve whispered.

“Mmm.” You mumbled.

A nurse came over to fetch the baby, telling you he’d be in the care unit while you caught a bit of shut eye. As much as you wanted to hold your son in your arms more, the voice of sleep was calling to you too sweetly now.

Once you’d made sure James was safe in his cot, you felt Steve’s fingers run through your hair gently as he kissed your forehead, whispering in your ear over and over again how much he loved you and how proud he was of you.

All of those moments that you’d imagine what it would be like to have a baby paled in comparison to what you felt now. Your heart pumped with pure love, for your husband and child, you couldn’t even fathom how much your body held.

It was all falling into place, the life you and Steve had always wanted.

Before you completely passed out, Steve whispered one last thing to you that set your sweet dreams in motion.

“You’re my hero, darling.”

(AND that’s it folks. While you’re here, please please please check out my new fic that’s I’ve been working on for over a year now. Click riiiiiiiight here for part one ilyilyily)

#steve rogers x reader #Dad!Steve #steve rogers #steve x reader #bucky x reader #bucky barnes #chris evans #Sebastian Stan #mcu #marvel #fanfic #bucky barnes imagine #steve rogers imagine

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writtendeclaration · 7 years

Photo

The author took the idea of Mount Olympus, and wrote a small story about Zeus, Hera, and how they rule their kingdom.

The epitome of paradise existed in only one instance, in one location, and was untouchable by anyone who did not have a claim on it. It was created for the express purpose of housing those who had earned it, who were immortal and blessed with grand powers that those below them could only imagine. Those who lived in this paradise, who were immortal and had grand powers, all had one other thing in common, one thing that gave them their right to this paradise.

They were all descendants of Zeus. Zeus, who’d created this magnificent place, and Mount Olympus was exactly what he'd wanted it to be.

The King of the Gods looked out over his creation, watching as his descendants went about their endless day. Some strolled through the field below his throne, alone or with companions. Others lounged about in the grass, napping or reading. All of them looked content.

That pleased Zeus to no end, and he smiled in satisfaction. It had all been worth it.

“Is something specific making you smile, my lord?”

Zeus glanced downwards, and his grin grew. His wife stood below his seat on the dais, gazing upwards at him.

Hera lifted an eyebrow. “I'll need to find out what it is, so that you won't frown so much,” she joked, floating up to join him.

“It's nothing specific,” Zeus told her, returning his attention to the landscape before him. “It's just… the knowledge that all of this is here, for us, and -”

“And you created it,” Hera finished for him, nodding in understanding. “You’re pleased because the thing you’ve made is… well, marvelous.”

“It wasn't just I,” Zeus reminded her.

Hera rolled her eyes. “All I did was stand here and look pretty. You pulled everything together. In fact, I wouldn't even be here if it hadn't been for you.” She motioned to everything that lay before them. “All of this, all of us, is because of you.”

Zeus, who was used to hearing things spoken of him in such a manner, nonetheless shrugged in embarrassment. “It came at a heavy price.”

“Which makes it all the more important to everyone,” Hera persisted.

“No one aside from you knows exactly what happened.”

Hera glanced downwards at that. “And you'll never tell any of them?”

“There is no reason to,” Zeus responded.

Hera tilted her head a at him, and Zeus glanced her way. “What?”

“I worry about you, sometimes,” she answered after a moment.

“Why should you?” Zeus asked, genuinely puzzled. “We have everything we could ever want. We are gods of Olympus!”

His declaration seemed to make the ground and the sky above them shake, and Hera allowed it to pass as she continued to gaze at him. Zeus relaxed back in his throne, exhilarated with the feeling of his power.

He did look happy, she decided after a moment.

“Hera?”

She blinked, and realized that he'd been speaking to her. “Apologies,” she said, shaking her head. “I was thinking. What did you say?”

“I asked if you liked the plans we came up with earlier, for the tribute ceremony,” Zeus told her.

“Oh.” Hera offered a shrug. “They were fine. It will be the same as last year, and the year before that… there's never much that changes from one to the other. Everyone gathers to drink wine and sing about you.”

Zeus chuckled. “If I didn't know you better, I'd think that perhaps you were tired of them.”

Hera raised a hand, holding her thumb and fore finger a small distance apart. Zeus lost his grin, and frowned at her. “You are tired of them?”

“Just a bit,” Hera admitted. “Not because I'm tired of hearing everyone say that they love and appreciate you, but… because it's just... tiring.” She glanced at him. “You don't feel the same?”

Zeus stared at her, his expression turning rather dark. “No,” he said, firmly, “I do not.”

Hera immediately looked away. “Fine,” she said. “Forget I even mentioned it.”

Zeus was silent, and then he let out a breath and reached out to her, taking her by the wrist. Hera allowed him to pull her closer to where he sat in his throne, and he turned her so that she was facing him.

“Is there something else on your mind?” he murmured, gazing up at her. “You can tell me, whatever it is.”

Hera hesitated for a moment, and, as she did so, a voice called from down beneath the dais, “Lord Zeus!”

Zeus immediately slid Hera out of the way, gently, and peered down towards the field below. Standing there was one of the goddesses, the one in charge of standing at the gate of Olympus to make sure no unwanted wanderers came through.

“Speak,” he said to her.

“There is a mortal man at the gates, asking to speak with you, my lord,” she responded. “I told him that he would need to wait while I came to ask you.”

Zeus pondered this for a moment. It wasn't rare for the mortals to approach the gates, as curious as the creatures were. It was odd, however, for one of them to ask to speak to the gods, especially himself. There was either something wrong, or the mortal man had something important to tell him.

But…

He looked over at Hera, who’d settled down on the edge of the dais, her legs hanging over the edge. She turned to him when she felt his gaze, and offered him a tired smile.

There is something bothering her, Zeus thought, concern filling him immediately.

“My king?” the gatekeeper called, questioningly, and Zeus exhaled slowly. God business first, always.

He rose from his throne and paused beside Hera. “We will speak when I return,” he promised her, and she offered him a single nod in response.

Zeus descended from the dais, and joined the gatekeeping goddess. “Lead on.”

She led him across Mount Olympus towards the gates. As they went, they passed many different gods and goddesses, all of whom stopped whatever they were doing in order to bow until Zeus had gone by. He nodded to all of them in turn, his pride billowing. Surely whatever this mortal had come to tell him was nothing terrible. What could possibly be wrong when everything was so right?

As they neared the gate, Zeus spotted the mortal on the other side of it. He was rather young, Zeus thought in surprise, but he would have needed to be, to climb all the way to the gate of Olympus.

“Mortal, you are presented to Zeus, King of Olympus, Titan Killer and Fist of Iron,” the gatekeeper announced, pausing next to the gate. She offered the mortal a look. “Choose the words you will say wisely.”

Zeus eyed the mortal critically as he lowered himself to one knee, head bowed in submissiveness.

“My lord Zeus,” he began without looking up, “I come to Olympus with news from my village. I was sent because I am the youngest and the swiftest, and we need your help as soon as possible.”

“What would you ask of me?” Zeus inquired, curiosity taking over once more.

“The children in our village… they are dying, my king,” the mortal said, his voice rough with emotion. “They like to go and play in the forest near the village, but… sometimes, not all of them come back home when the day is over. We haven't been able to find any of them, and we fear the worst.” The mortal lifted his head, and Zeus saw the tears in his eyes. “Please, my king, help us.”

Zeus gazed at him, thinking this over. Children disappearing, but not all at once, from a village near the forest. It had to be a monster of some kind, but what, he could not say until he investigated further.

His thoughts wavered first to Hera, who was waiting for him to come and speak with her about whatever was troubling her, and then to the tribute ceremony, which was set to occur as soon as his son returned. If he wasn't there for it, there would be no ceremony. His gods would not be able to celebrate.

Then again… this mortal was clearly distressed by what was happening in his village, and Zeus had to admit it was worrisome. If whatever was taking these children moved on to a different village, or even managed to reproduce, there could very well be an epidemic in the mortal realm, and Zeus couldn't have that.

So, he nodded. “Very well,” he said, holding out his arm. Almost at once, there was a flash of light, and then his staff appeared in his fist. He tightened his hold on it, and looked at the gatekeeper. “Open the gate.”

She did as he asked, only looking the tiniest bit concerned by this decision. She watched him walk through, and Zeus turned around to look at her.

“Keep it locked until my return,” he said.

“My lord, what about the tribute?” she asked him.

Zeus paused. “Tell everyone that it will be postponed until my return,” he decided after a moment, “and… tell Queen Hera that I will be back as soon as possible.”

The gatekeeping goddess nodded, and Zeus rotated back around to follow the mortal’s lead. As they started away from the gates of Olympus, Zeus cast a glance over his shoulder.

Once again, he decided that he’d done rather well in building it, and he smiled to himself, facing forward once more. Being a king felt good.

Hera listened to the gatekeeper without actually hearing what she was saying. She was gazing out at the field before the dais, watching the gods and goddesses dotting it. None of them were doing anything of significance, but they all somehow seemed significant, in the smallest of ways.

She had to wonder if Zeus felt the same about them, or if he only saw them as even more people to praise him. Sometimes, she couldn't tell. Zeus was either adamant that what he'd done for them all wasn't as big of a deal as they made to out to be, or he was insistent that everyone needed to praise him, that his creations were the most important things in his life.

Hera could only wish for a middle ground.

“My queen?” She glanced at the gatekeeper, who was standing before her on the ground beneath the dais, her eyebrows drawn in worry. “May I speak freely?” she asked.

Hera managed a smile. “Of course.”

The gatekeeper nudged at a rock with her toe. “You don't look well,” she said after a moment.

Hera chuckled mirthlessly. “It's that easy to tell?”

“Maybe not to everyone,” the goddess replied, carefully, glancing upwards. Hera chose not to respond, and the gatekeeper lifted her head fully. “I’m sorry,” she said.

Hera let out a breath. “It's fine,” she decided. “Zeus is the king; I shouldn't expect him to always consider me, first, when there are literally thousands of others he needs to care for.”

The gatekeeper nodded in agreement. “That's true.” She offered Hera a smile. “Hopefully he will speak with you as soon as he returns.”

Hera glanced in the direction that the gates of Olympus lay. “Yes,” she said softly. “Hopefully.”

The gatekeeper left her alone, and Hera settled down in the grass, gazing upwards. It was still odd for her, sometimes, to think about how she’d gotten here. It seemed that no time had passed at all, despite everything that had happened since Zeus had created her and begun work on Mount Olympus.

She supposed it came from being immortal.

She liked to think that she and Zeus had made a home, here, amongst all their children. All of the gods and goddesses were descendents from the two of them, and, although not all of them acted like it, Hera cared about each and every one.

She knew that Zeus cared about them, too. It was just… perhaps he didn’t care for them in the same manner she did. To her, they were her children, her family; to him, they were his people, his worshippers.

There were a few, of course, that received special attention from their father. Those closest to their parents had received special gifts, special things to care for and watch over. In fact, one of their eldest sons had been given the task of watching over the entire ocean. Unknown to Poseidon, it was mostly so that Zeus wouldn’t have to hear about how he was the oldest, and that he deserved more than one of the second or third generation gods, but it was his prize, and he took it gladly.

Hera exhaled, and closed her eyes. She wished that Zeus could give as much attention as he did to some of the gods and goddesses that he did to everyone. She couldn’t exactly approach him about it, however; she herself didn’t even know the name of the gatekeeper, let alone some of the other gods and goddesses who received even less recognition.

No, they would never know all of their descendents by name, no matter how hard they tried. They just had to know that all of them were, in fact, the product of their relationship, and needed to be treated as such.

Which seemed to be something that was impossible for Zeus.

At least he doesn’t treat them poorly, she thought. Everyone lives comfortably, and it isn’t as though any of them don’t like it in Olympus.

That offered her some comfort, and she let herself relax a bit. As long as Zeus refrained from becoming a tyrannical leader, life would be comfortable, and that was the most important thing.

Her stomach lurched unhappily, and Hera pressed her hand against it, wincing.

Still, she did need to discuss something with Zeus, and as soon as possible.

It could wait until he came home, and the tribute ceremony was over, she decided. It wasn’t as though she had any other choice. The tribute ceremony always came first.

“Lady Hera, we need your help!” A goddess hurried up to her, panting. “A mortal is dealing with a difficult birth, and she needs your guidance.”

Hera couldn’t help but think that she needed a bit of guidance, too, but she rose anyhow. “Which village?” she asked. Even though she had her own issues, she was still the queen, and, just like her king, she had a duty to fulfill.

After all, if Zeus could put the mortals above her, she could do the same, couldn’t she?

#mount olympus #greek gods #zeus #hera #origin story #writing #gif

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