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peterspideyy · 4 years

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the words i never said | 1

part two

summary - tom has to leave for an interview, even though he’s late. he doesn’t say a proper goodbye to you. will he later regret it?

warnings - fluff, angst, blood

————

the light from your window seeped into the room, as you admired your boyfriend sleeping peacefully by you. you only woke up a couple of minutes ago, but the feeling of tom’s hand wrapped around your waist and how the morning light perfectly highlighted his features, made you stay in the comfort of your bed. tom stirred slightly, making you panic and close your eyes quickly, to pretend you have been asleep this whole time.

“i know you’ve been starring, darling.” tom whispered, making you smile at his morning voice.

“you just look to gorgeous in the morning not too.” you replied, opening your eyes to meet tom’s. he blushed slightly, before leaning down to kiss your lips, before pulling away to kiss your forehead.

“you always look gorgeous.” tom mumbled against your skin, which caused butterflies in your stomach to flutter. even though, you and tom have been together for a while, he still finds a way to make you feel how you first felt when you saw him.

minutes passed, while you and tom started at the ceiling, as tom gently stroked your bare skin on your arm. tom leant over to check his phone, before placing in down on the table. however, soon he repeated the action in a hurry, before jumping out of bed with a groan.

“what is it tommy?” you asked, wanting him to stay in bed.

“shit, i have an interview today. my cars in 10 minutes, i need to get ready.” tom replied, running around trying to find clothes. you laughed at his actions, before lying back down on the bed.

“right my cars here,” tom spoke, once he was finished, “i’ve got to go.”

you looked up, smiling at how cute tom looked today. he was only wearing a burgendy hoodie with black jeans, but he still looked adorable. you opened your arms for him to kiss and hug you, before he left.

“sorry love, if you woke me up early, i would have time to. i’ve got to go, bye.” tom shrugged, before leaving to get his car. you frowned. how was this your fault? he never told you, and if he did, it’s not your job to make sure he gets to places.

getting out of bed, you made yourself a coffee, still frowning as you thought about how tom left without saying goodbye properly. it’s silly really, but since you started dating you told each other that no matter the time or where they where going, the other person has to kiss them and tell them they love them. and tom not doing that today, made you so upset.

you tried to brush it off, as you got ready for work. wearing black leggings with a grey hoodie, with your hair loosely curled, you grabbed your phone and car keys before making your way to work. getting in your car, and starting it, you set off in the busy streets of london.

you decided that today you weren’t going to let tom’s actions ruin your day. but, his words kept on replying in your head over and over again, causing tears threatening to fall.

“stop it.” you told yourself.

your not going to cry over him. it’s stupid, that your even getting emotional over this. you know tom loves you. your thoughts got so much, that the road in front of you became watery at the amount of tears falling down your face.

you were so caught up in trying to calm yourself, that you never saw a lorry come the opposite way, towards you.

————

“so, tom, how’s it like filming your new film ‘uncharted’?” the interviewer asked, after looking at the price of paper.

tom nodded, “it’s really good. as an actor, it’s really broadening my skills to a variety of genre’s, and working with the joe and anthony again, helps.”

tom looked behind the camera, to see harrison on the phone. he looked stressed. anxious, even. harrison ended the call, before meeting tom’s. he knew something has happened.

“sorry, can i speak to harrison for a second?” tom asked the interviewer, before getting up, not waiting for an answer. tom walked over, and the closer he got to his mate, the more nervous he became.

“harrison-“

“tom, can we speak, privately?” harrison mumbled, as his hands started to shake. tom nodded, before they went into a room opposite the hall. harrison closed the door behind him, as tom waited for him to tell him what’s happening.

“i don’t want you to panic, okay?”

tom nodded, already beginning to panic at his words.

“it’s y/n, she’s had a crash.”

as those words sunk into tom, he couldn’t hear what else harrison was saying. his breathing quickened, and his stomach started to do flips as he felt his heart clench at his words.

“w-what? is she okay?”

“i’m not sure. she’s at the hospital now though.”

before harrison could even continue, tom grabbed his coat and left to the hospital, with harrison following behind. he didn’t let tom drive though, as tom couldn’t feel his legs. the drive to the hospital, was silent. the only thing was the road outside, as well as tom’s heartbroken sobs.

“stop. don’t think of the worst possible situation.” harrison told tom sternly, not looking away from the road.

“i-i never told her i loved her this morning. i was so late. i didn’t even hug or kiss her goodbye. oh my god.” tom replied, letting in sink in as the last words he could of said to you was ‘if you woke me up early, i would have time to. i’ve got to go, bye.’ tom couldn’t stop the tears from falling.

arriving in the hospital within minutes, tom and harrison ran into the entrance before heading to the main reception.

“hello, how may i help-“

“y/n l/n, is she here?” tom replied quickly, unable to speak properly.

the women noticed the panic, before typing on her computer.

“yes, she’s just had surgery. she’s in the healing room at the moment. but, only family can see her. what is your relation to her?”

“i-i’m her fiancé.” tom lied.

“okay, she’s on the 3rd floor room 110.” she smiled. tom walked away quickly, while harrison said thank you to the women.

the two men ran up the stairs, not bothering to get an elevator as the hospital was busy today. eventually, ending up at the third floor, tom asked the reception which direction was your room, before the man pointed down the hall to the left. tom breathed out a thank you, before running to the left, until he got to your room.

there was a nurse in there, probably checking your vitals. tubes were sticking out of your throat, as your neck had a bandage round it. there was a few cuts on your arms, but they weren’t that deep. tom could hardly see you, at the amount of tears in his eyes.

“i-is she okay?” tom croaked, to the nurse. she looked at him before nodding.

“she’s very lucky. she had some damage to her brain, but we luckily caught it in time. she’s going to be okay. we just have to wait for her to wake up.”

tom smiled, hopefulness rushing over him, as he stepped towards your bed. he crouched down, taking your hand in his as he kissed your knuckle, still sobbing at the mere thought of loosing you.

“i’ll leave you alone.” the nurse spoke, before tom heard her footsteps go further and further away. he never looked away from you once.

“y/n,” he whispered, “i’m sorry for not saying goodbye properly. if you can hear me, just know that i-i love you so much. god, when harrison told me, i was so fucking scared. please. wake up, darling.”

tom begged, stroking your cheek, before leaning in to kiss your lips, mumbling ‘i love you’ over and over again.

suddenly, the monitors started beeping. tom looked up, eyes wide as nursers came running in. it all happened so fast. her steady heart beat, started decreasing. nursers were telling tom to leave, but he couldn’t move. they were charging electricity through your body. tom couldn’t breath, as he watched the nursers trying to save you. he didn’t move, until he felt strong hands on his shoulders, pushing him away. he shouted, begging to go back into the room, but the person was strong, bringing him further and further away from you. he tried to escape there grasp, but he couldn’t.

“it’s for your own good, tom.” harrison spoke, above tom’s shouts.

————

hours passed. tom and harrison were in the waiting room. waiting. apparently, you had to go into surgery again, as there was a problem with your heart. harrison sat, taking sips of tea every so often, as he watched carefully at tom pacing back and forth around the room. he was mumbling stuff to himself, probably wishing that you were going to be okay. tom couldn’t stop crying, since he found out.

“mate. sit down.”

tom looked at harrison, eyes bloodshot and hair a mess, as he walked over to sit on the chair next to him. his leg bounced up and down, as his palms started to sweat.

“have you told her mum?” harrison asked.

shit. tom’s eyes went wide. he hasn’t. he shook his head, before getting his phone out of his back pocket. searching for your mum’s number, he clicked on it, waiting to tell your mum to worst news she’s ever going to hear.

“oh, tom, hi. how’s filming?” you mum asked, in her normally cheery voice. tom’s lip started to quiver, but felt harrison’s hand on his shoulder, to remind him that he isn’t alone.

“oh my god, hi, filming is good. but, i-it’s y/n.”

“y/n? is she okay?”

“i-“ before tom could answer, he broke down, crying into his hand as he heard your mum asking him what’s wrong.

“i-i don’t know. she’s had a c-crash. a bad one. a-and she’s in surgery right now. o-oh my god.”

“m-my y/n.” your mum whispered, before he heard your mum cry too. tom’s heart clenched, at the sound of her sobs on the phone.

“i’m so sorry.” tom spoke.

“oh tom. i-it’s okay. keep me updated, will you?” she asked.

tom nodded, before remembering how she can’t see him, “yes. i promise.”

“thank you.”

“bye.” tom said, before ending the call.

tom breathed out, feeling a massive weight on his shoulders go. but, soon he felt in come back on, when he saw surgeons. your surgeons, walking towards them. he stood up, as did harrison.

“are you y/n l/n’s fiancé?”

tom nodded, waiting for her to continue.

“would you like to sit down?”

tom’s heart dropped. he’s watched hospital dramas, and after surgery that’s what all doctors say, if the person has...gone. tom sat down, already crying, waiting to hear the bad news.

“she’s okay.” the doctor smiled.

tom breathed out, before leaning back in his chair, whispering a thank you.

“but, she’s in a coma.”

tom shot up. a coma?

“do you know when she’ll wake up?”

the doctor shook her head, “i can’t give an exact date. it’s unknown.”

tom nodded, “c-can i see her?”

“yes, follow me.”

tom followed the doctor, before arriving at your room. you looked worse than what you did. there was more tubes, sticking into different parts of your skin. tom’s breath hitched at the view.

“i’ll leave you.” the doctor smiled, before leaving.

“y/n?,” tom whispered, crouching down next to you like what he did before, “if you can hear me, i love you.”

tom cried into your hands. he hated this. so much.

but, unknown to tom, you could hear him. you could feel him. but, you couldn’t move. or speak. you wanted to wrap him in your arms, and kiss him on his head. but, you couldn’t. so you had to sit there, listening to your boyfriends sobs.

“i love you too.” you thought, desperately trying to tell tom.

————

a/n- thanks for reading! if you want me to make a part two, let me know!

————

tom holland tag list-

@parkersbliss @dreamofaprilsblog

@deathofmissjackson @averyfosterthoughts

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havethetimeofyourstyles · 5 years

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When Did You Fall Out Of Love?

It was crowded.

The train was crowded and I felt like I couldn’t breathe. People coming from different places and going to different directions. The continuous stops that make the small train seem less crowded, until more people get on and it’s the same as before or maybe even more.

Regardless, I couldn’t breathe.

As more people went and go, I felt a presence staring at me. And that presence was right across from me.

He was wearing sunglasses, even though it was gloomy outside in this London weather, and a baker boy hat, that I have to admit, looks adorable. Perhaps I shall get one myself.

I’m not a shy person. Some may say I’m overly confident, but I don’t agree. I am confident, but I’m not stuck up or in love with myself. I’ve learned to accept my flaws and accept that I can’t change them. I’ve learned to love those flaws and realize that it’s a part of me that will never change. And that’s what makes me, me.

I don’t avoid confrontation. I know how to not make things awkward when confronting someone, and I make sure to have my facts right. Without confrontation, people don’t solve problems. It’s all part of life and I love solving problems. Some people find me rude for some reason.

So, I say something to the man who’s staring at me creepily.

“May I ask what caught your attention that has you staring at me like crazy?” I ask firmly.

The man seems shocked that I actually said something. He opens his mouth, but nothing comes out, so he closes it.

“I-I’m sorry. It’s just that, uhm,” he stutters, and I raise my eyebrows for him to continue. He takes off his sunglasses, “it’s just that I think you’re very pretty.”

Scratch that. I’m shy when it comes from gorgeous men that compliment me.

“O-oh, thank you,” I blush. He smiles and nods.

The rest of the train ride was getting to know each other. Luckily I couldn’t stop the conversation in the middle since my stop was practically the last stop of the day.

I’ve come to find out that the man staring at me is named Harry Edward Styles. He’s from Holmes Chapel in Cheshire (which isn’t that far from where I’m from, Doncaster).

“My best mate is from Doncaster!” He said excitedly.

“Really? What’s his name? I might know him.”

“Louis Tomlinson.”

“Hmm. Doesn’t ring a bell.”

His eyes widen a bit and I found that weird.

He also used to work in a bakery before his job right now.

“So you know how to bake?” I question.

“I can make a thing or two,” he smugs.

“Interesting. Might have to take you up on that.”

His mum is named Anne and his sister is named Gemma.

“Yeah, they’re the best. I grew up with just them two around and they’re the best influence I could possibly have in my life.”

His eyes light up as he talks about the most important women in his life. It’s admirable, the way he talks about them.

He was in a band in high school.

“The White Eskimos?”

“That’s the one.”

“Might have to listen to your tape.”

“I’ll be sure to send one out to you.”

I learned that he also moved to London when he was sixteen because of his job.

“What kind of job are you doing that even made you move to London at sixteen?!” I was completely shocked, there was no way my mother would let me move out that young.

Harry chuckled, “well, I sing and perform.” I felt like there was more to it so I stayed silent, hopefully encouraging him to say more. But it seemed like he was waiting for me to say something. “I-I’m in a band, we’re called One Direction.”

Harry seemed like he was completely shocked that I didn’t know who he was or who they were.

“Wow, that must be crazy. Do you perform at little venues? Or bars? I would love to go to one.”

He chuckles nervously, “erm, not really. I wouldn’t say little venues per say. Perhaps bigger places.”

“I’m sorry, but I probably seem so stupid right now as I don’t know who you are. But how big are we talking about?”

He cleared his throat, he seemed nervous.

“Wembley Stadium, a couple times.”

I almost choked, “are you fucking joking?” He shakes his head. “That’s insane!

You must be a pretty big person then!”

He smiles a little, “to each their own.”

“I’d have a listen when I get home because that’s just-“

“This is the last stop of the day, please exit the train and have a lovely day.” The overhead intercom through the speaker is loud and that means that our conversation was over.

We both exit the train quietly and make it out of the tunnel and onto the street.

“Well, I’m this way.” I point behind me.

“I’m this way,” he points behind him, the opposite way of me.

“It was really great talking to you, Harry.” I give him a small smile.

“You as well, love,” he smiles back.

I’m not sure what to do. Do I just walk away now? Say goodbye one more time? I step forward and open my arms, reaching in for a hug. Harry seemed to get the memo and quickly leans in, reciprocating the hug.

The hug was everything I wanted. He’s a very good hugger. Just enough squeeze and not lazy. He runs his hand up and down my back, and I feel like my knees can lock in and I can just melt. There’s nothing else that can top this hug, and I hope he feels the same way.

We eventually let go and pull away, sadly.

“I hope to see you very soon,” he says.

“I hope so too.”

He gives me one last smile and starts backing up and turning around to walk away. I do the same and walk home to my flat.

You think back to the memory that happened nearly four years ago. You smile back to when you and Harry first met and the memory will forever be burned into your head, as it was one of the best days of your life.

After that day, it was four months before you saw each other again. He saw you at a record store and he completely stood still, shocked to see you after what seemed like an eternity.

Again, you felt a presence staring at you, so you turned your head and saw him. It was him. The same guy who was looking at you four months ago and the same guy who was still looking at you four months later.

You slowly walk over to him and he meets you in the middle.

“Hi.”

You’re smiling like crazy, thinking that you weren’t going to see him ever again, but here you are.

“I have to admit, the week after I met you, I went back to the train station, got on at the same station that I did, and waited for you to show up until the very last stop, but you didn’t show.”

Your heart was bursting, to say the least.

“I actually went back to Doncaster for around three months after that day. I decided I needed to see family and friends, so I stayed there and just kind of took that time to reflect.”

“Oh, well, I’m glad you’re back now.”

“I’m back,” you smile at him.

Its been hard. Its been hard waking up every morning to an empty bed. Every morning seemed to get harder and harder. You miss the conversations you had together. The conversations that’ll keep you both up at night and wake you both up first thing in the morning. The mornings that distracted you both from doing stuff outside the bedroom. Those were you favorite mornings.

Now, you just wake up to an empty bed, and it seemed like the bed is getting bigger and bigger, making it seem like your loneliness is expanding. But you won’t tell him that.

You were confident. Until a year ago. Harry’s schedule got busier and more hectic. With filming and promo for Dunkirk, his first solo album, and touring, his life kept going up and his dreams started to come true. But yours seemed like it was falling apart.

You wanted him to hold you and tell you everything was going to be okay. Because when he would say it, everything would actually be fine and things would work out perfectly. But he’s barely home for him to hold you and kiss you.

Every time you talked to him on the phone, you wanted to tell him everything that’s been going on in your mind. Everything that you bottled up, you wanted to unleash it. But you couldn’t. You didn’t want him worrying about you. He’s getting everything he wanted in his life, and you felt as if your problems would ruin his mood. Because all you want is for him to continuously be happy with that gorgeous smile on his face.

You struggled with your emotions and you were never like this before. Your mind is like a bottle. Each thought is so trapped inside that you feel as if your mind is about to combust because of the pressure. You want to talk…but you can’t.

It’s been hard.

Harry is suppose to be home for a bit, so he said on the phone. He has a week off before he flies to the U.S, so he should be home by the afternoon. You’re excited to see him. A bit nervous, but more excited. You talk to him on the phone about twice a week for about thirty minutes or an hour or until he has to hang up. But it’s usually never more than an hour. He’ll send some texts here and there throughout the week, but it’s the basic ‘goodmorning’, ‘goodnight’, or ‘what are you up to?’ and you feel like he’s doing it for the sake of conversation and the fact that it doesn’t make him seem like a bad boyfriend.

Yes, you feel him being distant towards you and you want to figure out why. You haven’t asked him because you’re nervous to, but it may be the fact that he’s touring (obviously, with time zones, it fucks everything up) and he genuinely doesn’t have time to talk. And you get it, he’s tired after the shows or he’d rather celebrate another successful show in a foreign city. But a call more than thirty minutes would be great.

You decide to clean the whole house, light up a candle, and cook a full meal for when he comes home.

You have music on as you sauté up a stir fry, one of Harry’s favorites. You sway your hips a little as your stir up the food vegetables that are sizzling on the stove, until you hear your phone buzz a bunch of times.

You see that it’s from your friend, attached with the massages are screenshots from various articles.

Have you seen these? Isn’t he suppose to be home today? Attachment: 2 images

You feel your heart already dropping as your hands shake to click on the article. Harry Styles out and about in London with stunning actress and looking good doing it! Singer and actor took some time off to go home before he starts the American leg of his 2018 World Tour. Harry was seen with actress getting lunch at Nando’s. Sources have said that Harry and recent girlfriend have split up since she was no where to be seen during his tour. Stick around for more updates to come!

Below the article were pictures of Harry and some beautiful woman at the restaurant. His arms on the table as he watches and listens to her talk. His smile all the way up to his ears and you can’t help but admire his million dollar smile.

But it hurt. It definitely killed you.

You haven’t seen him smile like that in what seems like forever. His calls and text don’t seem enthusiastic or excited to talk to you. And that hurt. Some other woman made him smile like that. She gets to see him smile for her like that. And that hurt.

And you decided not to go on tour with him because of school. You’re getting your masters degree in literature and that contained many essays and reading. You couldn’t drop everything you achieved to watch him on stage, no matter how many times you considered doing so. But he understood, he encouraged you to finish all the way through and you appreciated his understanding.

You feel a few tears stream down your face and you lift your hand up to wipe them. You put your phone down and turn off the stove. You put the food in a container and clean up. You couldn’t think about this anymore.

Harry was the one who said himself to not believe any of the articles that were written about him. And you didn’t. You didn’t believe them for four years and that saved the trouble and energy of arguing. Each article that was written about him with women, you didn’t believe any of them. You didn’t jump into conclusions and you didn’t make a fuss about them, because you trusted him. You trust him so much that no matter how much the pictures and words that correlated to Harry and a new girl hurts you, you didn’t make a big deal out of it. He was the first to say that you shouldn’t trust the media. So you didn’t.

But it still hurts.

A lot.

At 2 o’clock, you decide to pick up your phone and text him.

Hi, what time are you coming home?

You put your phone down and wait for it to buzz. So you decide to pull out your laptop and textbooks. Might as well study while waiting for him. A few hours passed and he still hasn’t shown up. You pick up your phone and check the times of the messages you sent.

Me: Hi, know what time you’ll be home? 3:05 p.m

Me: Are you on your way home? 4:00 p.m

Me: I made dinner, hope you haven’t eaten yet. 6:00 p.m

Me: Are you coming home? 7:00 p.m

Me: I’m heading to bed, wake me up when you come home. Would love to see you 11:00 p.m

You were tired. You waited eight hours for him to come home and the studying definitely put your mind to ease.

You lay in your extremely large bed, tossing and turning. You glance at the clock and see the red numbers reading that it’s 2:23 a.m and there was no sign of Harry next to you. You sigh, until you hear the front door open. Your heart beating fast as you think it may be an intruder, but you hear Harry’s boots click against the flooring.

You decide if you should run out downstairs to see him, but you hear him walking up already and opening the bedroom door. You stay in your position: on your side with the covers up to your neck. Harry can’t see that you’re still awake. You don’t know why you aren’t moving to get up and attack him with kisses, perhaps your nervous for some reason.

Harry makes his way into the bathroom and you decide to sit up and wait for him.

You contemplate what to say to him. You’re not sure why it’s different this time round, but obviously something has changed, way before the recent article that was released.

Once the bathroom door swings open, Harry was about to walk out, but stop immediately, surprised you’re awake.

“Oh, why are you up?”

‘Hi, I missed you’, to you too.

“You told me you were coming home today. I texted you,” you said softly.

“Yeah, I was suppose to, but some of the lads wanted to go out for drinks and my phone was off,” he says as he goes into the walk in closet.

“The lads as in?”

“Lads from the band and tour crew.” You’re completely shocked.

“Harry, I haven’t seen you in at least three months and you see them every single day. Why do you need to hang out with them even more when you said you would be home?”

“Because I fucking wanted to? They’re my friends and I wanted to go out for a drink with them.”

“Yeah, but the purpose of taking a week off was to be at home and not think about anything else.”

“Would you back the fuck off? If I want to go out, then I’ll go out. I don’t need you to tell me what to do,” he rolls his eyes.

“I’m not telling you what to do. I’m just trying to understand your logic.” He doesn’t say anything, but scoff. Tears begin to well up in my eyes as he gets in the covers on the bed. He laid on his side, his back facing me.

“I-I just missed you, is all.” You didn’t hear him say anything, but sigh deeply.

“Missed you too,” he mumbled into the pillow. You took a deep breath and laid back down.

“I love you,” you said softly, but you know he heard you loud and clear. But he doesn’t say anything back and your heart starts to break.

You’re waken by your right arm cramping up from laying on it the entire night. You glance at the clock, reading that it’s 7:00 a.m. You’re also waken by Harry rummaging through his things.

“Harry? What are you doing? Get back in bed,” you said tiredly as you prop your elbow to lean on it.

He ignores you and continues going inside the closet and back out. You adjust your eyes and sit up fully, seeing that he’s packing. Not unpacking, but packing. He’s putting more clothes in his suitcase, if not all. And that’s what fully awakes you. It’s like all the tiredness from the previous night and early morning vanished.

“W-Why are you packing? What are you doing?” You’re panicking as he doesn’t say anything to you. You get out of bed and look inside the closet, most of his clothes are off the hangers and in the suitcase.

“W-Wait, stop. Just stop. Hold on. Why are you packing?” He hears the shakiness in your voice and he feels bad, so he stops for a second to turn around and look at you.

Your eyes are glossy, “what’s going on?”

He sighs deeply before he says, “I’m leaving.”

“What? Why? Where are you going? You have a whole week!” You feel tears at the corner of your eye, threatening to fall down.

“I just need to get out of here. I can’t stay here any longer.”

“But you just got home! Why are you leaving already?!” Tears are now streaming down your face and there’s no way that you can stop it.

“I told you I can’t stay here any longer,” he repeats.

“Is it me? That’s why you’re leaving? I didn’t mean to nag when you got home, I just missed you so much,” you approach him, putting your hands on his shoulders.

“Please, why are you leaving me?” Harry isn’t looking at you. He looks straight ahead as you put your hands on his cheeks, trying to pull them down so he can look at you and you could kiss him, but he wouldn’t bug.

He’s about to say something, but his ringtone is loud on his dresser. He makes a move to get it, but you beat him to it. You don’t want to and you never were one of those girlfriends who looked at their boyfriend’s phone, but you couldn’t help it. The caller id was a woman’s name. One that you recognized from one of the articles.

He watches you as you glance down and looks up at him with sad eyes. “Here,” you say as you hand his phone to him.

You watch him as he looks down at it, realizing who’s calling, and answers it, “hello? Yeah… I know… I’m almost done… just-just wait for me. Bye.” ‘So he is leaving me.’ You think.

You don’t say anything as he hangs up and just looks at you. You can tell he wants you to say something, but what’s there to say?

“I gotta go.”

“So I heard.”

“Look-“

“Are you cheating on me?” You had to ask.

“What?” He questions, not sure if he heard you right.

“You heard me.”

“I-I can’t believe you would think that I would cheat on you,” he says, “but if you need to know, no, I did not cheat on you and I never had.”

You don’t say anything as you watch him zip up his suitcase. He heads for the door before he turns arounds to get a look at you.

“Tell me when,” you say.

“What?” He furrows his eyebrows.

“Tell me, when did you fall out of love with me?” Your eyes are practically a waterfall.

He doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t say when or how or why. He doesn’t even say that he never fell out of love. He just stayed quiet.

“You know, it hurts. Yeah, cheating is horrible and wrong, but knowing that you fell out of love with me and I couldn’t do anything about it? That hurts. A lot. And the fact you’re not even denying it, hurts even more.” You pause. “And if you walk out that door, we’re done.”

He still stays silent as he looks down with guilt. You both hear a honk outside of the door that he is about to walk through. He is about to leave the one place that made you feel safe when he was with you. And he is about to walk out of your life.

The day you met him, you couldn’t breathe. There were so many people on that train, stepping in and out. And you couldn’t breathe. It was crowded. It was so crowded you thought about walking home from five stops away, but you didn’t. You didn’t and it was possibly the best decision you made because you met Harry. And once you started taking to him, it was like the world around you disappeared, and you slowly caught your breath. Being with him for four years, you felt like you were in the wilderness that had crisp air. The one that was so fresh and satisfying.

But now you couldn’t breath again.

You walk towards the stairs, not bearing to see him step on your heart and leave it hopelessly.

“Goodbye, Harry.”

Part two

let me know if you want a part 2 and if you want to be tagged!

#harry styles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles imagine #harry styles one shot #harry styles smut #harry styles x you #harry styles x reader #harry styles angst #angst #romance #older writings

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revisionaryhistory · 4 years

Text

Three Days ~ 57

~*~Emma~*~

Before jumping in the shower, I pulled up the naked picture, put a peach (I was in Georgia, after all) over my ass, and posted it on Instagram along with one of Amy and I floating and holding hands. I drew a heart around us and captioned it “Sister love”. When I got out of the shower, I had a text.

Sebastian ~ Imagine my sad face when there wasn’t a peach free version in my texts. Nice bikini.

Emma ~ You mean the version with my bikini bottoms that my sister took.

Sebastian ~ Ok, maybe not. Still a sad face.

I sent him a posed bikini shot.

Sebastian ~ I’m not going to complain. What a beauty. How is it going?

Emma ~ Five minutes and I'll call you.

Sebastian ~ Should be just enough time... with my new bikini pic.

Emma ~ Now I know why your biceps are so big.

Sebastian ~ Foreams.

I pulled the towel off my hair, threw on clothes, and opened my iPad. Didn't take him long to answer. "Ce mai faci, Sebasti-an?" <How are you?>

“I was having a good day, now it's even better. How about you?"

I caught him up on the day and plans for the long weekend.

"You're going to be busier than me. I’ve got dinner with the guys. Then Canada. Sounds like our Sunday date may need to be postponed."

Our phone sex date. "Hell, no. Do you think after a day with family I'm not going to need to release some tension?"

Sebastian sighed, "That's all I am to you. Tension release."

"More of a perk than a purpose."

"I can live with that." He shrugged with a smile.

“That’s good because dad introduced to an eligible doctor today. He wanted to invite him to dinner. I told him my boyfriend didn’t like me to go on dates with other men.”

“Damn straight.”

“I call him bait.”

“To his face?”

I snickered and shook my head, "We've got pizza coming for dinner. Wanna meet the fam now? Natural conversation ender."

"Whenever."

I stood up, "Now, then I'll call you later. Unless you're falling back into your hole."

He held his thumb and forefinger an inch apart, "A little hole. I’m all yours whenever."

"Won't be too late." I opened my door and headed down the hall. I could see everyone in the family room. "Hey guys, I’ve got Sebastian. Want to meet him?"

Amy yelled, "Yes."

I put the iPad on the coffee table while they squished together. I stood behind them. "Family, Sebastian. Sebastian, this is Katie, Amy, mom is Andrea, and dad is David."

"Nice to meet all of you."

Katie got very close to the camera like she did when she talked to me, "Do you have a dog?"

"I don't have a dog. Do you have a dog?"

"No, but I want one. What about a cat, do you have a cat?"

He shook his head with a pout, "They make me sneeze. I have a fish. He lives with your Aunt Emma. His name is Mycroft."

"That's a stupid name."

Sebastian crinkled up his nose, "I know. Emma named him.”

Amy pulled her away, "We don't say stupid."

"She's a cutie." Sebastian looked between us. "I’m about to sound like I’m sucking up. All four of you are beautiful and carbon copies. Love the new hair, Amy."

Amy ran her fingers through, "Thank you."

Mom added, "Sucking up or not, always nice to hear. Amy said you're on your way to Canada."

Sounds like Amy had told our parents about our conversation.

"Yes. I have a movie showing at the Toronto Film Festival. I’m doing some advance press and meetings."

"And Rome," from Amy.

"Female spy movie."

My dad spoke up, "I‘m a history buff and have read about the units, mostly in Europe during World War two."

And they were off. Sebastian had been researching and dad directed him to a couple of books. They were animated and their conversation bounced back and forth. Sebastian managed to guide the talk around and asked mom about the mini-family reunion going on Sunday. Mom talked about the menu before she started sharing embarrassing stories. Sebastian told a few on himself. I pulled Amy in and she retaliated with a particularly embarrassing story that ended with me peeing by the side of a road. Maybe this meeting thing was a bad idea.

Sebastian looked at me, "So when we take a road trip you can point out the best places."

His words were teasing, but his expression was adoration. I felt it all over and smiled in return. "I imagine you’d block me from view instead of advertising a roadside strip show like she did.”

“I would.”

Fifteen minutes in the doorbell rang. I was starving but wished it had taken a little longer. I had been a little worried at first when it felt like they were interviewing him, but like he’d told me and I’d seen, after a few minutes they went back to normal and talked to him like he was anyone else. I was still standing in the back and went after the pizza, putting it on the table before returning to my spot. He and Amy were laughing about something.

Sebastian glanced up at me for a second, “I don’t want to keep you from dinner. Emma’s bragged on the pizza place. Go eat while it’s hot.”

Amy and dad said it was nice to meet him and mom said, “Fingers crossed things continue and we get to do this again or in person.”

What the fuck!

Sebastian saw me make a face and throw my hands up. He smiled and spoke to my mom, “I’m not going anywhere.” He glanced up to me, “I’ll talk to you later, Em?”

“Yep, I’ll text to make sure you’re still up.”

I used the time it took me to walk around the couch and close the cover on my iPad to calm myself down. What an absolutely strange thing for my mother to say to my boyfriend. By strange I mean bitchy. I wasn't willing to let it go but now wasn't the time. I'd like to say because I didn't want to confront her in front of the whole family, but it was because I was hungry.

Amy was buckling Katie in her booster seat, mom had the plates, and dad had multiple bottles of beer. I had no function. I sat down and opened the pizza boxes. The first bite was as good as I remembered. The combination of flavor and the happy memories made me smile. I chased the bite with beer and was in heaven.

I was content to sit quietly enjoying my pizza and beer. My twin was not, "Sebastian is nice and funny. He tells great stories. His expressions. I mean I know he's an actor, but this was him as a person. I like him."

"Me too," came from Katie.

"And he is gorgeous." Amy’s eyes were huge, "Gorgeous."

I pulled my lips to the side and nodded, "Yes, he is."

From the end of the table, my dad spoke, "Amy, tell us what's going on at the lake?"

Mom added, "Is Max going to be there?"

The rest of dinner was my parents talking to Amy about tomorrow and asking questions about her and Max. Not one word from either of them about Sebastian. I could tell they knew a lot about Max by the questions they asked. Zero questions about my boyfriend, who they knew next to nothing about. They knew next to nothing about how we met or what we’d done. They were asking about Amy and Max though. I wasn't even included in the conversation. I didn't have a function here either.

I wonder how much beer is in the fridge or tequila in the bar?

I’m angry. Sebastian was charming, self-effacing, and knew enough about them to ask questions. I don't expect them to gush all over about him, but how about a "he seems nice" or even "it was nice to talk to him.". But no. Nothing. Zippo.

One of the first things I learned in rehab was anger is a secondary emotion. Equally as valid, but still derived from another emotion. Something comes first and triggers anger. My feelings are hurt. They can talk to Amy about Max at any time. Literally at any time because she lives here. I'm here for five days and we just had him on FaceTime. Silence. I feel discounted.

I volunteered to take the garbage out. I needed some air. Instead of coming back inside, I sat down on one of the loungers, putting my phone on the side table. Closing my eyes and focusing on my breathing I tried to slip into calm. I was almost there when I heard the doors open and close. The calm disappeared. I was guessing it was mom. Dad wasn't one for confrontation and there was no mistaking there was going to be confrontation. Imagine my surprise when it was both of them.

"Hey, sweetheart." Dad sat on the foot of the lounger next to me. I pulled my feet up, making room for mom.

"Hey, has Katie gone to bed?"

Mom shook her head. "Amy's reading to her."

"We wanted to talk to you about Amy."

"OK." I was a little confused. "She seems really good. The last few months we've been texting and talking more. Today was nice. Laying here in the pool talking like we were teenagers again."

Mom put her hand on my foot, "I’m glad. Amy told us some of it."

My dad had his hands clasped between his knees. "Amy has been doing well. She has a good job, has been going out with friends, and she likes this Max."

“I remember him from high school."

"We'd like to keep her doing well. This is the longest she's been sober. We need you to tone it down a little."

I cocked my head, "Tone what down?"

Dad said, "Talking about Sebastian."

In an interesting twist, mom tried to lessen that blow. Sort of. "In general too. How good things are going at work and your social life. She compares herself to you and we don't want Amy to feel bad about herself."

I needed to know, "Did Amy say something? Have I said or done something for her to feel inferior?"

"No, not all. She said the same as you about how good it felt today."

Amy saying she felt less was completely different than what was going on here. I fought back angry tears. "First, I have barely talked about Sebastian. Amy asked questions from the hospital to here. I was excited for you all to meet him, but did it before dinner so it was time limited. That’s all I’ve said about him. You two don't even know how we met. Your disinterest is pretty clear.” I looked at dad, "I wasn't going to bring him up until after dinner, but you were trying to set me up." I turned my head to my mom, "And you straight up said if you two don't break up maybe we'll talk to you again."

"Emiliana, you're overreacting. Sebastian seems very nice and seems to be quite taken with you. My comment was more for Amy. He's a movie star. Of course, she's jealous, but she needs to remember dating doesn't mean forever."

"But you said it to Sebastian. Why would you say that to either of us?" I had my hand up with all fingers pointing at my chest. "Sebastian is the first relationship I’ve had in forever and you're forecasting the end. I’m happy and you're saying maybe it’ll last. That’s hurtful and mean."

"I’m happy for you. We're just asking you not to rub your sister's nose in your happiness and success."

Had I thought there was the slightest bit of truth to that statement I would have backed down. But there wasn't. "I've done no such thing. I've intentionally not done that. There's so much I could be saying, but haven't."

"Thank you. Please keep it that way." .

I stared at her. The correct response would have been they wanted to hear all about him.

My dad's voice cut the silence. "I didn't know you were dating anyone. I wouldn't have mentioned Frank coming to dinner if I had. What's so wrong with wanting my daughter to come home?"

He did well until the last sentence. It sucked the anger out of me and left sadness. "But you don't want me home. You want a version of me who isn't excited about a new boyfriend, or celebrates winning a volleyball tournament, or has friends who enjoy hanging out with me, or is proud of how she does her job. Or is at least is willing to pretend she isn’t."

Neither said anything. They couldn't because they knew I was right. I picked up my phone and stood up, "I'm going to go sit by the lake for a bit. Watch the water."

Mom didn't move, but Dad stood up. "Emma, Amy has struggled and worked hard to deal with what happened that summer."

I curled my lips in tight, refusing to cry. "So did I."

I walked along the wooded path and to the end of the dock. I sat dangling my legs off and called my other dad.

Ed picked up on the first ring, "It's too soon for you to call. You haven't been there for twelve hours."

I jumped right in. "I had a fight with my parents. The day with Amy has been great, like we were kids again. We’ve laughed and talked and even had this moment where we connected about what happened. Then my parents literally told me to stop being so happy. I might make Amy relapse."

"I love you, Emma.” He gave me a smile that was more sad than happy. “Tell me what they said. Exactly what they said."

Tears rolled down my face as I relayed the conversation.

Ed was silent until the end. He has always tried to be objective and not say anything negative about my parents. "Fuck them, Emma."

I started laughing. "I knew I wasn't overreacting. It’s not even that they want me tone it down because I do that with Amy all the time. I always check what's going on with her before I tell her what's going on with me. I'm always careful."

"I know you are."

"It's that they don't even consider me. Not a word. Had they said they wanted to hear all about Seb, but things were rough with Amy it would have been alright. But Amy's doing great and I can't be too happy in case she might not be. I have to be half of me so they can hope she'll be whole. I want her to be ok too, but not at the expense of me. To throw out they want me home. Why would I ever even consider moving back here with people who want me to diminish myself? And that she struggled. What do they think I did?”

“You could tell them.”

“Tell them? Are you crazy? So next time Amy is feeling bad about herself they can tell her then she relapses and tells whoever. No, thank you.”

Ed laughed, “I didn’t say it was a good idea. Don’t forget it’s your choice. You always have a choice. Even if it’s the best choice there are consequences. For the record, I think you made the right choice.”

I laid down on the dock. I know it’s not about sides, but I needed somebody on mine. Ed was on mine. “I want to go home.”

“Call an Uber and go to the airport. You need money, I’ll send. Or call Sebastian he’ll fly you home.”

That made me laugh, he was clearing the way for whatever I needed. “It’s my choice.”

“Always.”

I thought a second and Ed was good with the silence. “The only reason I’m not going home is that I don’t think this is Amy and we’re spending a day out with friends tomorrow. I don’t want to miss a good visit with my sister because my parents are assholes.”

“You said that, not me.”

“I read your mind. I love you. Thank you. I’m better.” I groaned, “I’m supposed to FaceTime Sebastian. I’m sure I’m a mess.”

“Don’t lie to him. Don’t pretend everything’s ok. Let him support you. I think he’ll be good at it. Doesn’t mean I’m going to quit giving him shit.”

“He doesn’t think you’re going to kill him anymore.”

“I’ll have to work harder.”

We hung up and I headed back toward the house. It was nearly pitch black out here and I wanted to see Sebastian.

#sebastian stan #sebastian stan fanfiction #fanfiction #sebastian stan X ofc #marvel actor fanfiction

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lululawrence · 5 years

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lululawrence’s April 2019 Fic List

Click here for previous months’ fic lists

Guess who’s back, back again... I actually wrote that when I drafted this post a month ago and I’m keeping it cause it’s funny ahhaha So this month has been a ride, hasn’t it? I’ve read some amazing fic though, so I’m super excited to talk about it with you! I read quite a few from the Shake Off the Dust collection as well as fics from the beginning of round 2 of @onedirectionbigbang and other various things as I tried and failed to keep up with all the new fic coming out haha We are so blessed to have so much amazing fic. So, without further ado, here are the fics I read and loved this month!

Hazy by @nikogda / nikogda This fic was written for me because I was anxious one day and they saw a post referring to it and they wrote this as a soothing fic for me and lemme tell ya, IT WORKED. It was so soft and... well... hazy. haha I loved it. A great fic to come back to on a rough day, for sure!

Keep Your Hands Up, So I Can See by @goodmorningtoyouuniverse / GMTYUniverse This fic was such a great HP AU! It was enemies to lovers with a touch of misunderstanding and frustrations and just all the good things with cameos by some of our favorite characters from the original series! I loved it very much a lot. It threw me into the world and made me smile quite a bit.

it's in his kiss by @disgruntledkittenface / disgruntledkittenface This is where Maggie took what she wrote through requests on ask and posted them to ao3 for the kiss meme and lemme tell ya! There’s some ships she wrote that I never felt a desire for, and she wrote them so perfectly that I almost started shipping them hahahaa Each chapter is it’s own little world and it pulled me in so entirely that they felt like full fics! How does she do that in such few words? I dunno. But they’re all glorious. Every last one. Defo a great read when things are hard too, i’d read a chapter when I had a moment and it made my busy, stressful days so much better.

Nothing's Gonna Stop Us Now by @allwaswell16 / allwaswell16 I think this one was written for the short fic fest, and I loved it so so much! She describes Harry’s movements as “giraffing about” or something like that and I will never stop laughing about that. Add to it that Harry in the fic legit thought Louis was a mannequin and I just DIE. It’s amazing. Such a silly, fun fic!

Soju (소주) by @gettingaphdinmomo / gettingaphdinlarry This is a Shiall fic that just drew me in. It has such a visual and atmospheric pull to it, like all of her fics do, and it makes you almost feel as if you’re somehow there. I dunno how she does it, but her magic is worked for sure with this fic and I had to just sit there, and process when it ended. A fun, short fic to easily get lost in.

Just Go With It by @rainbowsandlovehl / rainbowslovehl (Larrymateforlife) This fic!!!! Meet Cute heaven! It was light and fluffy and awkward and silly and I loved it so much and for real this Brett character was TOO MUCH. hahahahaha With the added fun of the little jokes like talk of organic guacamole etc and I loved it so much. It was the smile I needed.

All I Want Is To Fall With You by @2tiedships2 / 2tiedships2 Mel keeps posting fics that are so fun! How does she do it? This time the crew takes on a ski trip and Louis has to deal with stupid alphas staying in the same cabin without knowing about it beforehand and of course nothing goes to plan! That’s half the fun, though, right? Besides. The alphas aren’t that bad. haha

Do You Wanna Ride by @phd-mama / phdmama She wrote this fic for @justalittlelouislove and I screamed reading it the whole time. I took so long reading it because I kept stopping to scream and share how uncomfortable I was over the obvious awkwardness and sexual tension and it was just SO SO SO GOOD. The embarrassment just gahhhhhhh I loved it.

Strawberries & Cigarettes by @dimpled-halo / dimpled_halo A year later I FINALLY read this and I loved it as much as I knew I would. I wanted pain, and it gave it to me! It gave me pain and healing and a gorgeous story. It was such a great read, I’m so so happy I finally had the time to dedicate to it because it was just. So much of everything I love.

Let It Down by @red--special / red_special This fic has also been on my to read list for ages and I am also so so happy I got to read it finally! It was such a great fic and so much fun and so sexy and funny and awkward and I wanted to bask in it a little longer. It was so so good. hahahaha I keep thinking about the tattoo and I can’t stop giggling. Just do yourself a favor and read this fic. haha

Like A Siren In The Night by @crazyupsetter / whoknows This is an a/b/o fic that I could not get enough of or read fast enough. It’s historical, though that doesn’t play a major role, and the playing with the world building was SO MUCH FUN to read. The way their relationship developed as well was just DELICIOUS. I loved every second of it.

please forgive me if my lips quake by @disgruntledkittenface / disgruntledkittenface Girl direction! With a cat! I was heart eyes the entire fic and once again, such feeling was evoked in it that I wanted to just sit and enjoy it for awhile longer. Sigh. What pure enjoyment! I loved it.

I was the King (tonight let it go) by @sadaveniren / SadaVeniren I... Okay listen. lollll I didn’t write this obviously, but it felt like such a self indulgent read I almost wished I had? If that makes sense? It was everything I love. I LOVE the emotional side and thought behind BDSM. Like, that’s most of what makes it so so so interesting and fascinating for me to read, and Sada gave that to us with this fic in DROVES as well as the fighting against natural inclinations etc etc etc. It was just a fab fic and I loved so so so much of it.

Failure to Launch by @all-these-larrythings / Rearviewdreamer Michelle has a way of taking things I don’t know about and making me love them so so so much. This film was one that many I knew loved and I felt mainly meh about it, but I knew if Michelle wrote it I would love it, and I WAS RIGHT. She took all the things I was not fond of in the original and twisted them so it still referenced the original source, but made it so much better. I loved it so so so much because it was so very much like the original film, but also very much her own.

Come Home to Me by @pocketsunshineharry / ishiplouis I wanted pain, and pain was what I got. I cried and I kept waiting and waiting for things to come together again and they finally did! But WOW the pain leading up to that! It was amazing how much was harnessed in it. I will say, please beware the tags. Some heavy topics are handled in the fic - including some depression/anxiety etc - so please be safe with that. A great read, though!

fondre ton absence by @scrunchyharry / scrunchyharry OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG I just. I’m a sucker for WWI and WWII period anything. It’s one of my favorite periods in history for the social, political, militaristic, just EVERYTHING historically. I find it fascinating and I adore it. I was both excited and wary how this would go then, knowing how much I love it. Well. I cried the entire way through and was in awe of how the time period and everything was handled. It’s an amnesia friends to lovers wartime period-typical homophobia acknowledging fic which basically means it is my dream fic. I cannot rave about it enough, much less the incredible art that was done by @whenthebodiesspeak!!! It was STUNNING and yeah. Just. Amazing. A masterpiece.

An Unbalanced Force by @kingsofeverything / FullOnLarrie MAROLD HAROLD with art by @goodmorningtoyouuniverse! I cried a few times during this one and it was such a realistic and beautiful and comprehensive view of a relationship, of adulthood, of trying to find love again after, just... all of it. It is a study of flawed individuals trying to make do and learning where their lines are and it is gorgeous. I loved it so so so much and I keep randomly thinking about it. A great fic and worth the wait and teasing she gave us over the months! hahahaha

That's What I'm Here For by @taggiecb / taggiecb ANOTHER DREAM FIC, ANOTHER FIC THAT MADE ME CRY! I cannot rave enough about how this big bang has kicked off, like, I just truly cannot. @noellehenry did a gorgeous moodboard for it as well, and I just. Demisexual farmer Louis who has been on his own for so long he just. Hardly knows how to be social anymore and Harry has to come and teach him and I’m about to give away spoilers so I’ll stop but this fic is so close to my heart, okay? I love love love love love it.

To Carry Onward by @londonfoginacup / LadyLondonderry THIS LITTLE FIC!!! I keep yelling, I know. Sorry not sorry. But for real it’s 500 words and just...so full of love and longing and mystery and hope and I cannot. I love Emmu’s words and worlds and this is no exception.

A Spell and A Spark by @dinosaursmate / dinosaursmate It’s out in the world! This fic was everything I needed when I read it. I was having a really rough time, and I would get to the end of those days and get to read this fic and it soothed me, cheered me, and took me away to another world. It was so much fun and just pure joy to read. And then the art that @londonfoginacup made for it! It was such a great combo of writing and art. Another wonderful fic for big bang!

{insert acclaimed artist} was never even in love anyway by underthesunlight This is the first of several fics I read from the Shake Off the Dust collection and it was such a fun read. It was domestic and silly and soft and it made me smile.

Primtemps by @londonfoginacup / LadyLondonderry She’s just so good, isn’t she? I finished this fic and almost immediately went back to the beginning because I wanted to read it again. It’s so soft and you could almost SMELL what she was describing. It was a perfect read of a perfect day and it made me long for the days in the past that I’d had like it. Glorious.

Taking Care of You (Is My Favorite Thing) by @allthelarrylovex / cherrylarry Niam! Not usually my pairing of choice, but I loved it so much. I also very much identified with the shitty allergies aspect of it as I am dealing with that myself at the moment, so it just had me sitting there nodding like IT REALLY DOES SUCK BABES I GET IT hahaha

You Keep Me Warm by @crinkle-eyed-boo / crinkle-eyed-boo (KimmieRocks) I’ve not read Own the Scars yet, but I still read this despite it being a time stamp, and I’m so glad I did. I loved it and it made me smile. It also made me want to read the original, so I can’t wait until I have a chance to!

Love's Gentle Spring by @laynefaire / Layne Faire (HisDarlin) This is also a continuation! It’s a fun addition to her spring drabbles from last year, which are not necessary to read in order to enjoy this, though it does add to the fun hahaha I loved that little series so much and was very very glad she made this addition!

Housewives of Our Lives by @homosociallyyours / homosociallyyours I’ve never watched any of the housewives shows, but that didn’t matter. As usual Megan wrote a fic that had me wanting to be their friend and hang out with them as they did these ridiculous things because it sounded like such fun. I loved it as well.

A Larry Limerick by @kingsofeverything / FullOnLarrie I know this was mostly silly and to be funny, but I enjoyed it so I’m including it here hahaha

sun, here it comes by @louandhazaf / YesIsAWorld and It's been a long, cold, lonely winter by @kingsofeverything / FullOnLarrie I’m putting both of them here, because if you haven’t read them yet you should. They are two sides of the same story, and I fully recommend you read them in the order I listed them too haha I did and it was wonderful and delightful and basically all things good. SO much fun.

just me, him, and the moon by HazHas4Nips This was cuuuuuuute! I don’t even know what more to say, I just keep sitting here and smiling thinking about it. So I guess if you want a fic that makes you smile, this is a great little one.

Spring Break by @allwaswell16 / allwaswell16 This fic came out of a partially true story and it was so much fun to finally be able to read what Anitra did with it haha I was giggling and loving it so so much the entire way. As usual. Can’t go wrong.

What's Mine is Yours by @uhohmorshedios / yeah_alright This fic is listed as a Narry fic, and it is, but it’s Narry friendship which made me giggle so so so much! hahaha It was so funny and the way Harry was described and Niall’s just...almost annoyance? I can’t even explain. It’s so much fun.

Latching Onto You by @reminiscingintherain / reminiscingintherain This fic is pure fluff. Fluff and silliness and all things sweet and good. I was trying to find the best way to describe it and the first thing that came to mind was it was a bowl of sweet dessert and I finally realized it’s a parfait. It’s got layers, but all of it is sweet and soft and yummy. hahaha SO if that sounds like something amazing in a fic, then you defo wanna give this a read!

Face Your Fears by @sadaveniren / SadaVeniren I’ll be honest, I finished this one around 2 am after a very long day and had to wake up too early again this morning, so I still haven’t fully computed this fic lollll Just know the pain is real, it is glorious, the journey the characters all take and the way Harry and Louis’ relationship grows is so incredible, I just... this fic is everything I’ve wanted in an a/b/o since I started reading a/b/o almost five years ago haha

And that’s my very long fic list from this month! I hope you enjoy them as much as I did if you give them a try. And please remember to leave nice comments and kudos for the authors who work so hard to gift us with these stories! Happy reading :D

#mine #fic list #my fic rec #fic rec #april 2019 fic list #28th appreciation #fic writer appreciation

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shakespearefreak · 5 years

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SIXcago!

Epic story time!

On Saturday, my friend @laropasucia and I took a roadtrip to Chicago to see SIX the musical! It was... incredible.

The drive there was long, but we found ways to pass the time (even aside from 7-Eleven Slurpee tributes to Soviet Cinnamon Rolls).

Gorgeous view of a scenic highway, of all things, from a stop along the way.

Finally, we arrived in Chicago. I suddenly remembered I hadn’t been there since I was a kid, and of course walked around gawking like an obvious tourist.

At Navy Pier

(Yeah, I know the pic’s blurry...)

Can you imagine being at the top of that Ferris wheel? 😮

Arriving at the theater!

The Show

It was breathtaking. I cried from joy before the first song was through. Human beings shouldn’t be able to do the things I saw the Queens do on that stage. I kept forgetting that I was watching a live show, because that’s not possible, it had to be a film with multiple takes and special effects... the energy level, the emotion, the audience interaction, the choreography, the costumes, the lighting, the way everyone on stage was perfectly coordinated, their VOICES... I’d never seen a show even remotely like it.

I tried filming MegaSIX, but I couldn’t find my phone for the first part! (Also, I didn't get the end on film because I wanted to experience the last couple seconds without my phone in front of me.) My camera skills leave much to be desired, and the video quality sucks, but I WAS THERE and it was INCREDIBLE!

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After the show, I waited for the Queens at the stage door, and a spontaneous SIX singalong began in the crowd. It was an almost magical experience; it felt uncannily synchronized, like we’d all rehearsed it together. We got through “Don’t Lose Ur Head,” “Haus of Holbein,” “Get Down,” and part of “All You Wanna Do”... and then suddenly the people in front broke off singing and started screaming as the Queens appeared!

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(BTW, if you’re featured in this video and don’t want to be, please let me know!)

Meeting the Queens!

They were all so incredibly lovely to the fans, each in her own way.

Abby Mueller (Jane Seymour)

Abby’s voice as Seymour instantly caught my attention. It has a unique quality that made “Heart of Stone” even more captivating. Seemingly effortlessly, she hushed the auditorium when we were still pumped up from the first three upbeat songs.

Abby was the first Queen to reach out to me. She saw me standing back, clearly wanting to approach but also not wanting to be rude, and held out her hand to me with an open, friendly smile. She talked with me a bit and made me feel a lot more comfortable.

Anna Uzele (Catherine Parr)

Anna’s Parr was a powerhouse. Trying to describe her performance, the word I keep coming back to is Fierce, with a capital F.

What I noticed most about Anna was she didn’t want anyone to be left behind. Several times she called out, asking if there was anyone in the back who still needed anything signed. She seemed very chill, 100% a professional, but also very personable.

Courtney Mack (Katherine Howard)

Courtney’s Howard was the queen of audience interaction (pun fully intended). Her flirty winks, amused aside glances, and “see-what-I-have-to-deal-with” eyerolls out were like she knew everyone in the audience personally. On more than one occasion I would have sworn a smile or a wink was meant specifically for me, even though logically I knew everyone in my general direction was meant to feel precisely that.

Courtney captured my heart immediately when I saw her at the stage door. She seemed so much like her character! She took tons of time with every fan, and talked with to everyone who approached her with full attention, wide eyes, and a dazzling smile. She was so sweet, and seemed so genuinely excited and pleased to be around the fans.

Andrea Macasaet (Anne Boleyn)

I admit, I was nervous about Andrea’s take on Boleyn. I love what I’ve seen of Millie O'Connell so much, I was afraid no other performer could live up to her. Andrea took those doubts and utterly decimated them within the first few seconds of “Don’t Lose Ur Head.” Her voice and overall performance are both wildly different from Millie’s, but retain the same core character. And like Millie, she seems to have absolutely boundless energy: she bounced all over the stage the entire show.

In person, Andrea is TINY. Like, almost shockingly small and doll-like. I called her “adorable” at least twice before it dawned on me how awkward that was. I apologized, but she seemed completely unfazed, like it wasn’t at all unusual.

Brittany Mack (Anna of Cleves)

In a cast of flawless dancers, Brittany’s Cleves still stood out. Her reflexes seemed nearly inhuman, and every movement was deeply expressive. Brittany told Cleves’ story with her whole body. And as if that wasn’t enough, she can do some absolutely insane stuff with her voice.

My self-consciousness caught up with me while I was talking to Brittany. Next to all these gorgeous women, I felt so awkward. After I took the photo, I said something like “I look stupid but oh well, I’m happy” and she immediately said I looked beautiful, and I believed it, the way she looked at me.

Nicole Kyoung-Mi Lambert (Catherine of Aragon alternate) ft. @laropasucia

"No Way” is one of my less favourite songs on the cast album, because it sits immediately between the sheer electric energy of the opening number and the absolutely addictive “Don’t Lose Ur Head.” But Nicole strutted forward and blew me away. Her Aragon took command of the theater with the force of sass and total badassery, and made me completely forget that my favourite number was coming up next.

I couldn’t find Nicole in the swarm of fans for the longest time, and only managed to catch her attention just as they were all being called backstage again! She still took the time to give me an autograph and take a photo, even though a staff member was urging her to wrap it up.

They all signed my program, too!

(The gold thing is a random piece of confetti I snatched from the stage after the show as a souvenir)

The only slight disappointment of the night was that the only piece of merch I really wanted, a set of buttons, was sold out. But I did pick up a tote and a coffee mug!

👑 💛 💚 💎 ❤️ 💜 💙 👑

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love-little-lotte · 5 years

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POTO Manila 2019 Experience

I crossed one thing off my bucket list last March 2, 2019.

Finally, finally, finally. I finally got the chance to witness my all-time favorite musical, The Phantom of the Opera, live. Anyone who really knows me knows that I am totally in love with this show.

I first learned about the existence of POTO when I was 10, when I first read an abridged version of the Gaston Leroux novel. Then I watched the 2004 film, starring Gerard Butler and Emmy Rossum. Ever since then, I fell in love with the musical. I listened to the Original London Cast, with Michael Crawford, Sarah Brightman, and Steve Barton. I watched the 25th anniversary, with Ramin Karimloo and Sierra Boggess. I streamed countless YouTube videos. I wrote down the lyrics, memorized them by heart, and sang along even though I couldn’t reach the high notes, not for the life of me.

POTO became one of my passions, and (yes it sounds cheesy AF) also helped me become the person who I am today. It’s not my first musical (family friendly The Sound of Music is my first because my mom plays the Julie Andrews movie all the time), but it opened my obsession to musical theatre. Through POTO, I got to learn more about Broadway, theatre, and musicals.

I have my brother to thank for this wonderful experience. This was meant to be a birthday and graduation present all rolled into one. And it’s actually the best present I’ve ever received. Not only did he pay for all of my expenses, he also accompanied me and took my pictures! Shoutout to him for making one of my major dreams come true.

This was taken on our way to the theatre. It was a one-show day, and the play was going to start at 2:30 PM. I heard from my friend (who already saw the previews) told me I should be there as early as possible so I can take a lot of pictures before most of the audience arrive. And since I want to take as many photos as I can, my brother and I left our hotel as early as 12 noon.

I was so excited I even took a photo of the theatre while we were in the car. My heart was pounding the entire time. My head was reeling. I still couldn’t believe I was there. It felt like a dream I had before. And believe me when I say I dreamt a lot for this moment.

When we got closer to the theatre, I saw a big poster just right outside. I gave out an excited squeal. “I got to take a picture of that!” I told my brother.

And so I did.

Before entering, we noticed there was some Phantom stuff just right outside by the entrance. Aside from the make-up closet (which is self-explanatory), I didn’t know what was inside of the rest of the boxes but I still took some photos nonetheless. I still had a lot of energy around this time.

This was by the entrance: some posters of the musical productions that toured in Manila before. (From left to right: Chicago, Singin’ in the Rain, Les Misérables, Wicked, West Side Story, and The Sound of Music)

After entering the building, I saw this amazing backdrop and of course, immediately posed in front of it......

.....only to learn the words “The Phantom of the Opera” were cropped so I told my brother we had to go back so we can take a proper picture again.

And there we go.

We went to the second floor afterwards, which was where the theatre was located. And this was when the “taking of photos” spree began.

Exhibit A: Mask, roses, and candelabras. Yep, that’s the whole show right there.

I’m kind of bummed that they didn’t really have a photoshoot for the World Tour. I mean it’s nice to see Kelly Matheison from the West End cast because she’s adorable and gorgeous, but I would love to see some Meghan Picerno HD posters too.

Don’t mind me, I’m just posing here with the POTO posters.

Exhibit B: Ah love this shiny, sparkly mask. Yes, the pic is sadly a bit blurry.

Exhibit C: My brother told me to go sit down on the floor and pretend to be Christine, but there was no way I’m doing that with that dress. I wanted to put on the cloak and the mask, but decided I should go with the rose instead.

Exhibit D: “Look at yourself in the mirror, I am there inside!” This is my favorite picture, which also refers to my favorite part in the musical.

Exhibit E: Yeah at this point I was running out of poses. Standing and smiling at the camera was getting boring.

Oh, and would you look at this! A production of Cats in November 2019, starring Joanna Ampil! Isn’t that amazing? She’s one of my favorite theatre actresses and I would kill to see her sing Memory live.

Anyway, what’s up with the Philippines and Andrew Lloyd Webber musicals?

Yeah, what is up with Andrew Lloyd Webber and the Philippines? We just can’t get enough of it. I’d definitely want to watch Love Never Dies when it comes to Manila, even though I’m not such a big fan of the story. The music is brilliant, as well as the sets and costumes. Can we please have Meghan Picerno as Christine Daaé in this production once again? (And maybe throw in Jonathan Roxmouth, too, cause people love him so much here.)

At this point, my brother already left me. He went back to the hotel while I sat on one of the couches, waiting for the theatre to let the audience in. I took a selfie with the brochure. I thought we were all given a program for free, but it turns out you still have to buy them in the gift shop.

Yay! I’m finally inside. I was in the second row, which was very thrilling, especially since the chandelier was really close to me. I couldn’t wait for it to fall down at the end of Act 1!

Sadly, this is the only picture I had inside the theatre. I was so busy taking it all in that I forgot to take a selfie or something. I still couldn’t believe I was there.

I cried as soon as the overture began to play. There are three possible reasons why I did so: one, I can’t believe I’m really here; two, the music was so beautiful, and three, the light from the chandelier made my eyes hurt lol. But, whatever the reason was, I assure you, there were some tears.

My first genuine cry was during The Mirror scene, when the Phantom showed himself in the mirror. It’s just a super iconic scene, and truly one of my favorites.

But the major highlight for me was Masquerade. Sure, I was expecting myself to cry during All I Ask of You (Reprise) or the Final Lair, but Masquerade overwhelmed me. The costumes were amazing up close! I’ve mentioned a lot of times before that POTO costumes are my favorite things ever. The intricately-designed Elissa dress, the fan-favorite Wishing dress, the iconic white robe, and of course, my personal favorite Aminta dress.

But the costumes during Masquerade was the highlight. I didn’t know where to look because I want to take it all in! The ensemble were great, too, and there was just a big fat stupid grin on my face the whole time.

You know, live theatre isn’t that perfect. I can hear the whirring of the machines as they change the backdrop and their heels clicking loudly onstage. I see them spit at each other’s faces. But damn it, it was beautiful. It’s raw and real, which is what theatre is all about.

Sorry for the bad angle haha. This was the cast I saw my first POTO production and I’m eternally grateful at them for giving me a performance to remember. I was just so excited to see that I’m going to watch Jonathan Roxmouth and Meghan Picerno! I’ve seen a lot of videos of them rehearsing, and they both sounded heavenly. I was grinning from ear-to-ear.

Jonathan Roxmouth didn’t fail me. His voice was soft and angelic, and he truly embodied the Angel of Music. I got chills during The Mirror scene, as soon as he sang the words, “Insolent boy!” His Music of the Night was a spectacle, and his height difference with Meghan Picerno also helped. I don’t know why, but I really love it when the Phantom’s a great taller than Christine. Meghan only reached Jonathan’s chest, so their iconic “hug” scene during MoTN looked really good. He also glanced at me during All I Ask of You (Reprise) as he sang the words, “You will curse the day you did not do, all that the Phantom asked of you!” So that truly “made my night.”

Jonathan also scared the crap out of me during the Final Lair. He was truly menacing and just plain scary. I love scary Phantoms, and he definitely delivered! When he said the line, “You try my patience! Make your choice”, he put his face really close to Meghan, and I could definitely see him seethe angrily at her.

But he gained my sympathy in the last part when he started singing Masquerade to the music box. At that point, I was crying my eyes out already. I hope the people in my row didn’t judge me too harshly! No matter how many times I’ve seen POTO, I always cry during the Masquerade reprise.

On a side note, Jonathan’s really adorable in the curtain call. He made a Korean heart sign just after he bowed. Korean culture is really popular in the Philippines for some reason, and he earned a lot of laughs and claps from the audience when he did so.

Meghan Picerno, on the other hand, was the sweetest and sympathetic Christine ever. Okay, that’s a bit of a stretch since she’s the first Christine I saw live, and I’m a bit biased. Her crystal-clear vocals also didn’t fail. I’ve seen videos of her in Love Never Dies, and she was amazing there. Her Think of Me was just so pure, and her Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again made me teary eyed.

Meghan carried herself well. Not only was she a darling and innocent Christine, but she was also a fierce one too. During the Final Lair, when she said the words, “This haunted face holds no horror for me now, it’s in your soul that the true distortion lies”, her expression was not scared or anything. I just love that she could project a lot of emotions from Christine, and not only stick to one.

She also shared good chemistry with Jonathan Roxmouth, especially during The Point of No Return. The sexual tension between the Phantom and Christine was undeniable. The way they touched each other, even caressed each other in that scene was so, so, so good. It’s definitely one of the main highlights of the show for me.

And, of course, Matt Leisy was a darling Raoul. Just like his co-stars, his vocals were heavenly. His All I Ask of You is plain sweet. The way he hugged and twirled Christine at the end part of the song was also a major highlight for me. Also, he was very attentive to Christine, and he was protective of her - some important qualities that Raoul should have. In the Il Muto scene, when Christine started getting nervous that the Phantom was watching over her, I can’t help looking at Matt because he was so undeniably concerned and protective of her. And during Twisted Every Way, he was demanding, but at the same time, very considering.

Matt also worked well alongside Meghan. They balance well with each other. As a matter of fact, the three of them are great together. It’s obvious that they’re comfortable with each other onstage. The Final Lair was so thrilling, and it’s all thanks to them. I’m so happy that they get to be my first POTO Big 3.

Overall, the ensemble was great! I love them so much, and I’m extremely honored that I had them as my first ever POTO cast.

Also, bought two souvenirs from the gift shop! A really cute necklace (which costs 1,500 PHP/28.75 USD) and a tote bag (800 PHP/15.33 USD). I wanted to buy the charm bracelet, too, but I feel like I’m going to have more fun with the necklace, compared to it.

And there you have it! This was an extremely long post, but I want to immortalize my first POTO experience. I’m still in cloud nine, even though it has been almost three days now. It’s truly an experience I will never forget.

#phantom of the opera #poto manila #poto world tour #jonathan roxmouth #meghan picerno #matt leisy #phantom #christine daae #raoul vicomte de chagny #the theatre at solaire #andrew lloyd webber #musical #musical theatre #personal

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bracefacefreak · 5 years

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Beware long post below. Just some thoughts I had whilst I was re-reading twilight......

1) Sarcastic Bella is love. Sarcastic Bella is life. 2) No one can take away my headcanon black!Emmett with gorgeous tightly curled hair. Plus this means that he can totally teach Jasper about racism and why fighting for the Confederates was WRONG and they can support anti-racism charities together. 3) Jess’s little comment about Esme not being able to have children makes me so sad. 4) Ok, so Carlisle is a freaking surgeon. Like he spends his days elbows deep in people’s abdominal cavities. I have even more respect for him now if that’s possible. 5) Charlie’s lil crush on the Cullens is tots cute. 6) Wasted vampire trope #1 - the base instinctual fear that all human characters have around vampires, even though they can’t understand it. 7) Apparently Alice doesn’t give a shit about appearing human 8) Cute sibling moments-why didn’t we get these in the films? 9) What was the whole ‘electric current’ sensation that passed between Edward and Bella in science class? Is that ever explained? Do vampires conduct electricity now? 10) God damn it Charlie Swan, stop being precious. Also the fact Bella gets so choked up about her dad putting snow chains on her truck makes me so sad. Poor girl.

11) “No blood, no foul.” Not even trying to subtle are you Edward. 12) “...the doctor was in on it.” Literally almost fell over laughing. Poor darling Carlisle. 13) God, I forget all the angry scowling and even angrier silences. 14) I fucking love Bella’s petty inner monologue about rear-ending Ed’s volvo. Girl after my own heart. 15) Sam Uley-totally forgot he was only 19! 20) So Carlisle has been coming to forks for centuries. Even before the first settlers reached there. Interesting little fact nugget. 21) Angela is GAY! FFS Smeyer. 22) Bella’s equally petty inner monologue about non-fatally wounding Tyler so he can’t take her to the dance. This girl is a mood. 23) You know Emmett absolutely rinsed Edward about all his mooning and pining during their hunting trip. I’m talking about made up ridiculous cringe-worthy joke poetry about Bella’s eyebrows and some rather grotesque smooching faces. 24) “We all like to drive fast.” I totally headcanon that Esme is a fucking terrifying driver, after all she has shit to do-crazy vamp kids to keep in check, houses to restore, a very pretty husband to bone. 25) So much unsubtle foreshadowing. 26) “Grizzly is Emmett’s favourite.” This is 100% Emmett’s revenge on bear-kind for his almost-demise. 27) Wasted vampire trope #2 - vampires are able to communicate in tones too low and too high for humans to hear. Other animals however are a different matter. It’s not unusual for private conversation to be interrupted by baying dogs and the irritated meows of cats. 28) Why can Bella see blue veins in Edward’s arms? He doesn’t have blood? Did you even proofread this Smeyer? 29) Edward’s fears about facing Esme - I can just imagine Carlisle coming home to find Esme holding Edward there in a headlock, before looking up and saying your father’s here now, lets talk. Also poor Carlisle having to face Esme that evening and tell her Ed’s gone. 30) Wasted vampire trope #3 - the what Edward talks about his human feelings being hidden deep beneath his stronger vampire ones. I don’t feel we get to see much of this except for a few episodes of over-protectiveness and growling. This could have been much more interesting. 31) I would pay good money to hear more about Carlisle and Esme’s increasingly ridiculous and disastrous plots to try and get Edward and Rosalie together. I mean we think of them as the wise, mature adults but we all know that the Cullen children get some of their crazy from their parents. 32) I want an AU where Alice didn’t get her visions of Jasper and the Cullens and went absolutely feral, when the Cullens do run into her it’s as an enemy who they eventually persuade to their way of life.....or not. 33) Jasper’s gift is absolutely terrifying....I mean being able to manipulate people’s emotions, get them to feel what you want and by extension behave as you want. Ed even says he can use it on a crowd. That’s like supervillain level. 34) “You are mythical after all.” Ok so now I want an extended world of fantasy/horror/mythical beings. I’m talking mermaids/sirens, fay folk, ghosts etc. Make Forks like Gravity Falls or something. Please. 35) Edward whiny bitch Cullen repeatedly asking Bella if she’s going to tell her Dad that he’s her boyfriend. And if you think he stops doing this once their married, you’re wrong. 36) Edward’s forehead kisses are tots something he learned from watching Esme and Carlisle. I will die for this headcanon. 37) Edward tasting Bella’s tears. WTF!? WHY? WHAT AM I READING SMEYER!? 38) Carlisle found a real vampire nest at 23 years of age. He is canonically too clever for his own good. FFS sweety. 39) I forgot how much I enjoyed the part with Carlisle’s backstory. Also my poor bby boy suffered through his transformation without making a single noise. Even human!Carlisle had the self control of a saint. 40) Wasted vampire trope #4 - I know this has been mentioned before but the whole, vampires don’t need to breathe and get no relief from it but do it as habit. What other human habits and sensations do they have which have been altered by their transformation. 41) Aro and Carlisle playing tricks to try and get each other to drink from the other’s food source. It didn’t work cause of vamp smell obviously. I know I write this as if it’s playful, but we all knows Aro was a total bitch about it. 42) Edwin. Charlie Swan you are precious. Never change. 43) WHY DIDN’T WE GET TO SEE ALICE AND EMMETT HOLD HANDS IN THE FILMS! 44) “Occassionally Esme would call them to order.” I would pay good money to see this. Also does ‘ that include them’ include Carlisle? 45) Edward muttering a string of swear words both old and new, in multiple languages under his breath is a mood I recognise. 46) “Esme and Carlisle, they’ll have to leave, to hide forever!”.....”We’ve been there before.” I want this and every story of all the stupid reasons why the Cullens have had to flee the state/country in the past. Carlisle sometimes wonders whether all the trouble is worth it. This never happened when he was on his own. 47) I am unsurprisingly very much in favour of growling, snarling Alice Cullen. 48) Why does Bella have a secret cash hoard? Is that normal? Is it in case Renee’s dealers turn up demanding money? (Can you tell I’m not a Renee fan.) 49) Of course Esme installed fucking bombproof shutters on their house. My girl is so freaking extra. 50) How many speeding tickets have the Cullens collected over the years? 51) “He seems to stay just far enough away that I can’t hear what he’s thinking..” Was this just coincidence or did James somehow know about Ed’s power? 52) Alice sketches her visions sometimes - it’s something Esme taught her because sometimes her visions are so weird or disturbing or exhausting that Alice can’t voice them herself. So Esme came up with this way to try and help her get it out. 53) Wasted vampire trope #5 - vampires can speak so fast that humans can’t understand them. Just imagine Bella wandering in on a family discussion at the Cullen house and all she can hear is a high pitched squeaking because everyone is talking super fast. 54) Alice’s backstory makes me so sad 55) “Alice had a bit too much fun fabricating the evidence.” Ok, so two things: one, I absolutely wish we could have seen Alice destroying shit and two, I still don’t understand how they managed to convince anyone Bella fell down a flight of stairs, like did they have to push her down the stairs to ensure it looked realistic, did Ed spend ages artistically placing her in a suitable position. How did this work? 56) Also love that everyone just accepted that Bella would fall down stairs and through a window, she’s just that much of a clutz. 57) Also they stole a car and burned down a dance studio. The Cullens should have started a crime family, they wouldn’t have been good at it but it would have been hilarious. 58) Bella should have grown up with Charlie. End of. Renee sucks. 59) Charlie is absolutely crushing on Carlisle and I love it.

#sorry not sorry #twilight #reread #book #smeyer #mine #my thoughts

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bohemian-war · 5 years

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‘LOVE WILL TEAR US APART’ [CHAPTER 2]

(Credits to @bens-hardy for the gif).

Ben Hardy!Six x Fem Reader (Six Underground)

Summary (Six Underground): The film tells the story of 6 billionaires who form a vigilante squad by faking their deaths to take down notorious criminals. Warnings: language, character development, flirting, alcohol…

Word Count: 2.5k+ (…sorry that it’s too short)

A/N: Hi guys! Sorry that this took so long. I have been extremely busy these past few weeks so I hope you really enjoy this part. I am also taking my time as I don’t want to reveal everything straightaway so even when this chapter feels like a filler one, don’t you worry because from chapter three I am gonna start explaining everything about the Six Underground organisation and it really takes off from there :D. Also, in case you were wondering, I always imagined Joe as John as that bass player in The Black Heart ;). When it comes to Brian, it’s always been Machine Gun Kelly’s look as Tommy Lee in The Dirt. He is gonna play a big role in this story. So stay tuned!

(Credits to @geidiprimezs for the gif). Finally, I am sorry for all the grammatical/structure errors. Again, English is not my main language so I apologise for that. I always try to write more dialogue as a) it is easier to read; b) even when I love description I suck at it so I am sorry if you always find the same word/expression in every sentence. I always tend to write as to how the story is developed in my head in the first place. So, I am sorry. I am trying to get better at it, I promise. I cannot even express myself properly in my mother tongue. It is something I’ve struggled with since I was a child and it keeps getting worse due to my anxiety so bear with me on that one!

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PART 1

(I will do a master list and a playlist soon :D).

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Disclaimer:

– Fem Reader is a twenty-one-year-old med student studying at the Imperial College London.

– Ben (Six) is a twenty-eight-year-old billionaire.

The story takes place in 2019 but there are flashbacks to make the whole thing look more realistic.

Finally, the outfit that Ben is wearing to play the drums is the one on the gif (beanie included :P) and this is the reader’s:

Enjoy!

[Y/N POV]

Y/N AND ELLIE’S APARTMENT, LONDON. PRESENT DAY.

“What are you doing?”

“Looking for something…” you say focusing all your attention to your laptop’s screen.

“Is this about that playboy boyfriend of yours again?”

“Ellie, I already told you that he is not my boyfriend. He was just being nice...”

“Playboy boyfriend or Prince Charming. It does not matter. All of them are basically the same. They act nice and then they trap you in their spider web to get in your pants.”

You roll your eyes and ignore her comment.

“He is like a ghost! It is like he’d just vanished!”

She makes her way to the couch and sits next to you with a cup of tea in her hand.

“Maybe he is not on social media. I mean… Six? What kind of name is that?”

You sigh as Ellie sees you scrolling down on Facebook desperately.

“If you’d like, we could always try and track him down… Perhaps if you ask some people in the pub…”

“I am not going back,” you affirm bluntly.

“Then, I don’t know how I could help you, love.”

You sigh again and turn your gaze towards her.

“It is okay. I just wanted to thank him properly for what he did.”

“Are you sure this man even exists?”

“Ellie…”

“Okay, okay. Just sayin’”

You sigh again for the third time and look back at the screen. You slam it down close and stand up.

“You know what? I had enough. I might pop up to the National Gallery for the new music bands exhibition. Are you coming?”

“I’d love to but I am helping Eric with his new project.”

“New project?”

“I’ll keep you updated as I don’t even know what I am doing myself. Knowing Eric though it might involve RuPaul and drags and stuff…”

You laugh and shake your head.

After spending so much time debating about your outfit, you finish getting ready and take the first train from your place to Charing Cross. When you get off and go out into the street, the square is full of people. On the one hand, tourists who do not stop taking pictures with their selfie sticks and, on the other, locals who return home after a long and hard day at work. You make your way to the main entrance and grab a map from the foyer area. The exhibition is huge so you decide to visit the rock section first.

NATIONAL GALLERY, LONDON. PRESENT DAY.

You are simply surprised by the amount of memorabilia. The gallery shows the history of the biggest names in music: AC/DC, David Bowie, Iggy Pop, The Rolling Stones, Mötley Crüe, Led Zeppelin… The collection also includes handwritten song lyrics, costumes worn during performances, studio equipment, promotional material, and singles. One of the spaces is beautifully dedicated to Queen and your eyes end up admiring various musical instruments; from John Deacon's bass guitar and a replica of Brian May's synthesizer to Roger Taylor's drum set.

Suddenly, you look away and come across with a familiar face. Casual look and hands in his pockets. He is also looking at the drum set. He is so lost in it that he barely notices you. You smile and decide to approach him.

[Six POV]

“Hey… It’s you!”

You direct your gaze towards that voice and your heart skips a beat. You never thought you would see her again. You could barely see her features under the dim light of the pub left alone when you both talked in the street. Nevertheless, everything changes now and you seem… speechless?

Wake up, you stupid asshole! “I just saw you admiring Rog’s set and thought that it’d be nice to say “hi”, Six right?”

She holds out her hand for you to shake. You eventually do.

“That’s thoughtful of you… Y/N?”

Of course, I remember your name…

She nods.

“Do you like music?”

“Who doesn’t?” Y/N smiles.

What a stupid question…

“I mean, the rock of the 70s and 80s…”

“Are you kidding? It was the best music! It still is… I think everything started with The Beatles back in the 60s though…”

You look at her with interest. You are surprised by her taste in music and want to know more.

“What is your favourite band?”

I cannot believe I am asking her these childish questions…

“Joy Division, The Beatles, The Rolling Stones, Queen… That’s why I decided to come to the exhibition today. They have done a great job so far.”

“Are you a Queen fan?!”

“Of course! I might have the biggest crush on Roger Taylor…”

I…like…you…

“All the girls do. I mean, he is alright…”

“Alright? Have you seen him in the 70s? He is literally gorgeous! Like a Renaissance painting.

You scoff and shake your hand at her obsession while running your tongue through your bottom lip.

“So… he’s alright…” Y/N repeats your words pointing at Roger’s set emphasising what you just said. “That’s why you were so lost in the kit!”

“No, I wasn’t!”

Liar…

“You look a little bit like him, to be honest…” Y/N smirks.

What…

She is approaching you now. She squints her eyes.

Too close…

“If only you had longer hair though…” her voice coming out like a whisper.

“What would you do?”

“Hmmm?”

“If I had longer hair… What would you do?”

You see her parting her lips and hold your gaze. Your eyes like blazing fire. If looks could kill or do something else… “I wanted to thank you for what you did last night but… I couldn’t find you and…”

“Don’t even mention it. It was my pleasure.” you cut her off and quickly run your fingers through your hair.

“Right…”

You try to avoid looking at her directly in the eyes because of the effect she has on you; a kind of warm feeling going down your spine, You don’t really know what it means but it kinds of scare you.

"Oi Six!" Suddenly, you see a tall man approaching and giving you a small pat on the back. You cannot help but return it with a big smile.

"Hey, what's up man?!"

"Brian, mate, how are you doing? Long time no see!"

“Good, I have not seen you in a while!”

“I have been busy…” You frown and sigh.

“I went to The Black Heart and Bobby told me that you would be here. Playing tonight?”

“Yeah. Hopefully, I’ll be able to make it by nine.”

“Great!”

Brian turns around and sees Y/N standing in an awkward position.

“Who’s this? New friend?”

You start feeling the tension built in the pit of your stomach. You clench your jaw.

“Sorry! That was rude of me. I am Brian.”

“Not at all! is it Brian for Brian May?”

“Wow! I like her.”

You cannot help but glare at him.

Watch it, mate…

“Unfortunately, I am not May but if you say so, I’ll take it,” he winks at Y/N.

“My name is Y/N by the way,” she holds her hand out again.

“Are you a Queen fan?”

“I certainly am.”

“Then you should come to The Black Heart tonight. Our friend Six here is gonna play. He is obsessed with Roger Taylor. He is his muse!

“Really?”

Y/N’s face lights up but you cannot tell whether is of surprise or emotion. She squints her eyes.

“The Black Heart…”

“Do you know it?” Brian asks in surprise.

“We actually met there…” you cut him off.

“Oh great! Everything settled then.”

“Brian…” you warned him.

“Are you playing too?” Y/N shows some interest.

“I’ll be there with some friends but I am not playing tonight.”

You can see the doubt in her eyes and you intervene before it gets worse.

“I am sure she’s got plans anyways, Bri.”

“Actually, I’d like to come!”

Fuck…

You curse and roll your eyes at the stupid situation. That pain in the chest again.

“Great! See ya both there then.”

[Y/N POV]

You definitely don’t want to return to the pub but there was something dragging you back there. It was probably the fact that you were very curious about watching Six play live. For some reason, you could not picture him behind a drum set and you were still mad at him for lying to you. On the other hand, it’d be nice to see him fail.

You made sure you were properly dressed this time. You did not want to get into any more trouble so you opt for a pair of fitted jeans, a nice top, high heels boots, and a black leather jacket.

Summer was about to start but it does not make any difference when you are leaving in London anyway. Ellie is not at home anymore so you finish cleaning, lock up, and make your way to the pub.

THE BLACK HEART, LONDON. PRESENT DAY.

[SIX POV]

“What time is your girlfriend coming?”

The boys are setting up and getting ready for the big night. The pub is already full of people chatting and having a nice time.

“I already told you that she is not my girlfriend, Brian.”

“Well, she is hot…”

“She is a kid.”

“I mean, if you don’t like her…”

You drop one of the mics and turn around with an angry look in your face.

“Don’t even think about it!” you growl. Your friend laugh.

“That’s what I thought, mate…”

You scoff and shake your head.

“Just make sure that you never play “I am in love with my car” in front of her or she will run away.”

“Oh, shut up!”

THE BLACK HEART (20:45 pm)

(”Princess of China” by Coldplay is playing)

[Y/N POV]

You arrive at the pub and it is already packed. You sigh and enter into an anxious mode. You simply couldn’t help but think of what happened the night before. Somehow, you manage to brush those thoughts off and get to the counter. This time, Ellie is not here with you so you have your ID ready in case they ask for it.

“What would you like lovely?”

“Just a coke, please.”

The bartender leaves and comes back with a glass full of the beverage and ice a few seconds later.

“There you are, sweetheart…”

“Thank you!”

You reach for your purse when you see the man shaking his head.

“It’s on the house…”

“Really? Thanks!”

The man nods and continues serving. You grab your drink and take it to your lips while observing the place again. You spot the empty stage in the distance including the drum set.

Where are you?

Suddenly, you hear a screeching noise coming from one of the microphones. It’s Brian!

“Night everyone! Some of you might already know me,” he says adjusting the mic to his height. “I am Bri. I was not planning on playing tonight but there has been a change of plans.”

Some people star clapping as he lifts his guitar up. You smile and take another swig from your coke with enthusiasm. “I’d like to introduce you to some people. This is John our bass player. And before someone makes the joke, no, we are not Queen.”

Many people start laughing.

“Finally, our special member, Six, on the drums…”

“Six, we love you!” You could see a couple of girls whispering and cheering about the drummer. You roll your eyes. So predictable…

“Sorry, ladies but Six will be just hitting on the drums tonight, I am afraid…”

You are thankful for Bri’s intervention and smile shyly to yourself shaking your head with amusement at the same time.

Six is sat behind the set of drums with a smug look on his face. He is finishing getting ready and checking on his equipment. He takes a swig of water and some drops stained his t-shirt. If he is nervous he knows very well how to hide it.

“We are gonna do some covers tonight,” Brian continues“… and we also have a surprise by the end of the night. So bear with us and we hope that you are all not to pissed to miss it.”

More laughs.

The list of covers is long but good; from “A Message” by Coldplay to “I Wanna Hold Your Hand” by The Beatles.

“And now… our final song…”

This catches your attention even more and all the pub goes quiet.

“…for a friend who’s currently in the room…” Brian puts on his visor and finally spots you.

“Y/N! there you are!”

Suddenly, a spotlight points directly in your direction and you have to cover your eyes due to the bright light. Everybody is staring at you and you start panicking. You freeze in your stool and feel a heat sensation in the pit of your stomach.

Oh no…

“Y/N loves Queen so we could not say goodbye without playing a song by the band itself. We will do the chorus and Six here will do the rest. “This is Crazy Little Thing Called Love”, everybody! Y/N we hope you like it…

When they finish, they are cheered by everyone and quickly get off the stage. You see Six approaching you and start playing with your straw while pretending to be drinking from your third coke of the night.

“Hey…”

“Hey…” you sigh.

“Did you enjoy the show?”

Six makes a sign to the bartender for what you assumed was a beer but he immediately directs his green eyes right back at you.

“Yeah, I mean, it was alright…” He raises an eyebrow and a smile begins to form at the corner of your lips. He shakes his head.

“Just alright?”

“Hmmm, I’d say meh.”

You wrinkle your nose in uncertainty and Six observes you with a funny look on his face.

“Let me buy you a drink.”

“I don’t drink…”

“Right…”

“But I will have one last coke. I will probably not sleep tonight with that much caffeine in my body though. I also feel that I should be paying for this,” you lift up your glass.

“It’s okay. I told Bobby that you are my host tonight. You can have anything you like. It is on me really…”

You frown and smile.

“Thanks…”

“Don’t even mention it.”

He grabs his pint and takes a big swig of it.

“I didn’t know you could play that well.”

“How could you know anyway?”

Rude.

“I truly enjoyed it, honestly.”

“I thought you said it was alright…”

“You were though…”

“Me?!”

You try to contain your laughter.

“Did you even see how I was banging those drums, love?”

Love…

“I know better…”

You could tell that he is offended.

Touché.

“What the f…”

“Roger Taylor is better than you!”

“Well, Roger fucking Taylor wished he could be me.”

Six scoffs and takes another large swig of his beer trying to hide behind his cruel words. You know he did not mean them. He adores Roger…

“Tommy Lee…”

“A total wanker!”

“Not true.”

“Well, he makes decent music. Not my style though.”

Six’s cockiness is back. A defence weapon.

“He does the real spinning…”

“I can do that too.”

“Sure…”

“I could show you if you let me…” he grins at you.

He leans into you and his big green eyes start taking everything of you in. His warm breath fanning over your face. That feeling in the pit of your stomach, again.

What is wrong with you Y/N?

Tag List: @bjhardy @pizzaplanets @mrbenhardys @bens-hardy @onceuponadetectivedemigod @benhvrdys @closertothesunwhenimwithyou @rebelrebelyourefaceisamess @calumfornicationx @poteda @hergewi @tanya-is-dead @imthewintergirl @rogerina-taylorr @sara-1705 @jessevans

#ben hardy #six underground #fanfiction #my writing #Love Will Tear Us Apart series #LWTUA #chapter 2 #ben hardy x reader #ben hardy fanfic #ben hardy imagine #au #alternate universe #bohemian rhapsody #bohemian rhapsody fandom #queen #queen fandom #six x reader #imagine #six

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spn-meanttobe · 5 years

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Spn Meant To Be Masterlist - 2015

RPS

Title: Cold Case Cop Artist: 2blueshoes Pairing: Jared/Jensen Rating: PG-13 Word Count: N/A Warnings: None Prompt: One year ago a wealthy socialite disappeared. No body was found, and the case was never solved. Lead detective Jared Padalecki knows all they had were dead ends. But when sexy, sassy reporter Jensen Ackles decides to ask more questions, he respects his intuition enough to reopen the case.Professionally, they're a perfect match. Personally, Jensen is wary of the sparks between them. Jared plays in a different league, one with money, power… things he's learned not to trust. And every step they take toward the truth—and each other—brings them closer to danger…Summary: Lead Detective Jared Padalecki is re-opening a cold case when things go sour... Link to art: on LiveJournal Title: A Season of Recovery Author: brutti_ma_buoni Pairing: Jared/Jensen Rating: R Word Count: 11K Warnings: Brief mention of suicidal thoughts; mentions of past Jared/OFCs, /OMCs, which don’t respect them as individuals, and an unvoiced assumption of past Jensen/OMC too. Background ableist and homophobic language; references to violence against women Prompt: ruman "Tru" Jelinek's life is pretty much off the rails. With his professional hockey career on thin ice, and his personal life falling apart, he's ready to implement some serious changes. Helping Jenny Martin - the only girl he's ever loved - make her dreams a reality is a good place to start. There's just one problem: Jenny doesn't want his help. She barely wants to speak to him. But Tru is prepared to negotiate a deal that even Jenny can't refuse. As trading favors turns into sharing passion, he has to face the truth that when it comes to Jenny, the game is far from over. Summary: Jared's season has come to an abrupt end due to injury. At home, hurt, sore, lonely and bored, he's not in the best of places. And then his career really goes to shit... Meeting Jensen, the guy he left behind, seems like it's making life harder. But at least Jared can use this time to put some things right for Jensen. If only Jensen would let him. Link to fic: on Ao3 Title: Let it be Author: crimsonepitaph Pairing: Jared/Jensen Rating: NC-17 Word Count: 20K Warnings: language, graphic depictions of violence, mentions of suicide, mentions of past Jensen/Jason Manns, mentions of past Jared/Sandy Prompt: Daredevil firefighter Jess Corbett has spent his life running - from memories of his childhood, and the death of his fiancee. Then a dangerous rescue sees him reunited with tough-cookie nurse Julie Clark. Her warmth challenges his avoid-at-all-costs stance on love, but can she break through the ice that encases this gorgeous loner's heart? Summary: Jensen is an ER nurse who is trying to survive a tragedy. Jared is a firefighter with his own tragic story. Jared's teenage son's accident brings them together - but can they overcome their heartbreaking pasts and find happiness together? Link to fic: on Ao3 Title: Guardian of my Heart Author: firesign10 Artist: amberdreams Pairing: Jared/Jensen Rating: R Word Count: 12K Warnings: None Prompt: He gives "secret service" a whole new meaning….How is the president's daughter supposed to have any fun while living in a gilded cage? Kelly would gladly trade the view from 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue and all its perks for what she really wants: an earth-shattering orgasm. But one perk Kelly would never give up is Michael Weston. She's sure the sexy secret service agent can give her what she desires—though falling for Kelly's seduction could cost him everything…Summary: President Gerald Padalecki's son Jared has been lusting after his gorgeous Secret Service agent forever. Jensen Ackles, the agent in question, is stoic and strictly professional. It takes Jared's life being in danger for Jensen to admit to his own, less-than-professional feelings... Link to fic: on Ao3 Link to art: on LiveJournal Title: Chinese Take-Out, Kinky Sex and Feral Cats: A Love Story Author: all_the_damned Pairing: Jensen/JDM Rating: NC-17 Word Count: 9K Warnings: mentions of past abduction, death (not either main character), emotional trauma, daddy kink, blow jobs, hand jobs, anal sex, spanking, inaccuracies relating to both police procedure and corporations, a complete failure to advance the plot by the author, unrepentant porn, having an orgasm or three is technically a “happy ending” Prompt: “Protecting Plain Jane” Ten years ago quiet heiress Charlotte Maywether was abducted and held for ransom…but when she was targeted a second time, SWAT officer Trip Jones vowed to protect her. The damaged beauty was slow to trust, but even she couldn't deny the tender bond forming between her and her handsome bodyguard. Trip was determined to keep Charlotte alive and help her face her life-altering fears. But with a serial killer on the loose and Charlotte willing to play bait, it would take every skill he had to keep his beautiful ward from facing dire consequences.Summary: Jensen—orphan, billionaire, business prodigy—is targeted by a serial killer. Jeff’s a disgraced detective on babysitting duty. Link to fic: on LiveJournal Title: The One That Got Away Author: twoboys2love Pairing: Jared/Jensen Rating: NC-17 Word Count: 30K Warnings: Angst, infidelity, bottom!Jensen Prompt: Good job? Check. Newly purchased apartment? Tick. Evie's life is on a pretty even keel at the moment. The only thing missing? A man with an edge to keep things interestingEnter Logan Black. Tortured, distant and sexy, Logan has edge written all over him. He's also the man who tipped Evie over the edge a few years back - she gave him everything but he didn't know when to stop taking. Leaving Logan was the hardest thing Evie's ever done. Until now. Because Logan's back, the chemistry is as blistering as ever and this time he's not going anywhere.Summary: Jared was in love with Jensen and things didn't go as planned. Jensen was closed off and things fell apart. Jared started his life over again, got a great job, a wonderful best friend and finally bought a new condo. When he moved in he was surprised to find out that the building super was, none other than, Jensen. Link to fic: on Ao3 Title: Real Slow Author: deirdre_c Artist: dollarformyname Pairing: Jared/Jensen Rating: NC-17 Word Count: 11K Warnings: none not covered by the rating Prompt: Melanie Craine knows romance isn't in the cards for her. She's ambitious, and has no time for a man in her busy life. With all of the other women at the funky gIRL-gEAR.com Web site meeting Mr. Right, someone has to keep things afloat! Then, when hot videographer Jacob Faulkner films her behavior at her friend's wedding, she's livid. Determined to make him see what's beneath her attitude, she tapes herself doing a steamy striptease...for Jacob's eyes only. Summary: The stripteasing on stage at conventions is a joke, until Jensen gets drunk and sends a private video to Jared. Then it’s not so funny anymore. Link to fic: on LiveJournal Link to art: on LiveJournal Title: The Gladiator Author: annie46 Pairing: Jared/Jensen Rating: NC-17 Word Count: 7K Warnings: Some reference to violence. Past references to the death of small children. Prompt: He won his fame--and his freedom--in the gory pits of Rome's Coliseum. Yet the greatest challenge for once-legendary gladiator Caros Viriathos comes to him through a slave. "His" slave, the beautiful and mysterious Pelonia Valeria. Her secret brings danger to his household but offers Caros a love like he's never known....Should anyone learn she is a Christian, Pelonia will be executed. Her faith threatens not only herself, but her master. Can she convince a man who found fame through unforgiving brutality to show mercy? And when she's ultimately given the choice, will Pelonia choose freedom or the love of a gladiator? Summary: Jen has been given his freedom and lives a more peaceful life in the city. He is given the chance to save someone from certain death in the beast pits and he chooses Jarrod. Jarrod is a follower of the Christ and brings danger to Jen's home but the two men become close and, when Jarrod's life is endangered, they realise that what they feel for each other is more than friendship. When the chance finally comes will Jarrod choose Jen over freedom and faith or will the two men be torn ansunder by their differences. Link to fic: on Ao3 Title: Defying a Pirate Artist: cassiopeia7 Pairing: Jared/Jensen Rating: G Word Count: N/A Warnings: None Prompt: Icy dread gripped Gemma Montague's heart as she stared at the approaching pirates. Their captain was dead, the lieutenant useless, and there were pirates approaching. Having spent years indulging her father's passion for studying Naval battles, Gemma knew this pirate was either very competent or very stupid, taking on a much larger ship.Captain Jack Molloy wasn’t stupid; he knew how to spot wounded prey, and the British man-o-war was disadvantaged. But he hadn’t expected defiance, particularly in the form of a beautiful English rose.Summary: As pirates overrun his disabled ship, Jensen finds himself rather taken with their leader. Link to art: on LiveJournal Title: Off the Menu Author: cherie_morte Artist: quickreaver Pairing: Jared/Jensen Rating: NC-17 Word Count: 27K Warnings: explicit sexual content (underage, 17/21 between main pairing, but there is some kissing before then), physical, sexual, and emotional abuse of a minor (all off screen, only the aftermath is shown), prostitution of a minor (between 15/16 when he starts), character death (not main characters, one quick but somewhat graphic description), underage drinking, brief mentions of suicidal ideation, and a homophobic slur Prompt: The Hooker - One night. One girl. She’s a hooker. She also the girl I can't forget. Who is Rachel Foster, and what do I have to do to get her back in my bed... and keep her there.Summary: Jared is an injured kid wandering down the side of the road the first time Jensen meets him. He brings Jared back to Baby's, his father's diner, to help. As they grow up, they become close friends, but just when Jensen is beginning to realize his feelings for Jared may be more than friendly, Jared disappears. Years later, Jared returns to his diner, but he's not alone. Every night, he comes in escorted by a different john, and Jensen quietly aches for the boy he fell in love with. Link to fic: on Ao3 Link to art: on LiveJournal Title: Somewhere wWith You Author: jillmariej Pairing: Jared/Jensen Rating: R Word Count: 40K Warnings: none Prompt: Whose Bed is it Anyway? Returning home after a daring rescue mission, all James Wolfe can think of is sleep. So he’s furious to find a beautiful stranger curled up in his king-size bed! Normally no woman ever gets between his sheets without prior invitation—who does she think she is? Disgraced celebrity Caitlin Moore has been offered a place to stay and she won’t give it up—not with the paparazzi outside, baying for her blood! Reluctantly she agrees to share the apartment with James—but, with enough electricity to short-circuit the whole of Manhattan, keeping to their own sides of the bed might prove impossible. Summary: Ever since his divorce became public, Jared can't go anywhere without the paparazzi hounding him. The scandals surrounding his marriage to Wall Street mogul Tom Welling swirl out of control, leaving Jared desperate to shield his young daughter from the media. When he flees with his daughter to a small town on the Florida coast, Jared's is forced to rely on the kindness of a strangerFour years ago, Jensen Ackles had everything he ever wanted – a partner and an infant son. But when that perfect life was torn from him, he vowed never to let anyone close again. Now, he spends his life traveling to scenes of natural disasters and helping those who can't help themselves.The last thing he needs after another exhausting mission is to find a stranger sleeping in his bed. He most definitely doesn't need to hear the Frozen soundtrack again. Link to fic: on Ao3 Title: Tidelines Author: phoenix1966 Artist: heartblowswild Pairing: Jared/Jensen Rating: NC-17 Word Count: 69K Warnings: Language, violence (mostly off-screen but referenced), minor character death (mostly off-screen), explicit sexual content between main pair, implied depression, implied alcohol abuse, hurt!Jared, possessive!Jensen, top!Jensen, bottom!Jared Prompt: Down River Attending a corporate retreat at a remote resort in Alaska, Lisa Vaughn is plunged into the frigid rapids of the Wild River. Swept away, battered and alone, she has been left for dead.Lodge owner Mitch Braxton knows something is terribly wrong when Lisa fails to turn up for a private meeting to clear the air and close the book on their broken engagement. Embarking on a heroic search that takes him miles downriver, he saves Lisa from the deadly water, but not before they've been swept deep into the wilderness.Far from civilization, the former lovers must put aside their hurt feelings and find the will to survive against nature. There's a killer on the loose and, for now, they must measure their future together in days rather than years.Summary: After five years together, Jared's boyfriend just left him one day with no note, explanation or way to contact him. Eight months later, still struggling with a broken heart, Jared finds himself in the wilds of Alaska for a corporate retreat, reunited with his long lost lover. But has fate brought them together only to tear them apart forever? Link to fic: on Ao3 Link to art: on LiveJournal Title: Stars in the Southern Sky Author: amypond45 Pairing: Jared/Jensen Rating: NC-17 Word Count: 36K Warnings: Minor Character Death, Bottom!Jensen, Angst, older Jared/younger Jensen Prompt: Becoming nursemaid to Paul Holmes's orphaned niece seems like the perfect solution to Becky Siddons's problems. After having her romantic hopes dashed, she's determined to focus solely on her charge and not the little girl's handsome uncle. Until Becky realizes she is losing her heart to a man determined to keep his own under lock and key…. Paul had hoped hiring Becky would allow him to keep a distance from his niece, a reminder of his late sister—and his failings in raising her. Yet he soon finds himself enjoying spending time with outspoken, impulsive Becky and the child. Can he take a chance on this unexpected, joyful new family?Summary: Handsome, brooding Jared Padalecki is a wealthy 32-year-old West Texas cattle rancher with a tragic past. When his sister dies unexpectedly, Jared takes on his sister's child, 8-year-old Adele, who has been traumatized by her parents' deaths and needs special care. He hires 22-year-old Jensen Ackles, fresh out of college, whose only qualifications are a bachelor's degree in English, a part-time job working with autistic children, and a tragic past of his own. From the moment Jared and Jensen meet, sparks fly, and it's obvious they were meant for each other. But the Padalecki home is harboring secrets, Jensen hears strange sounds in the night, and he begins to wonder if something – or someone – is trying to keep them apart. Link to fic: on Ao3 Title: Lies to Love Author: sanshal Pairing: Jared/Jensen Rating: G Word Count: 3K Warnings: none Prompt: One little white lie…one big explanation! Okay, pretending her sexy boss is her boyfriend is more like a huge white lie. But electrician Leah Santino will take the risk. If her parents think she has someone, they won't go back to smothering her, and they can all be a family again. Problem is, Jacob McKnight isn't just her boss—he's her friend. And faking a relationship when the Santinos come to visit means those sparks she's always tried to ignore are hotter than ever. This thing between them is starting to feel real, but Leah has a very good reason to stay independent. Unless that's one lie that's outlived its purpose…Summary: One little white lie…one big explanation! Link to fic: on Ao3 Title: The Night that Almost Happened Author: soulmatecest Artist: soulmatecest Pairing: Jared/Jensen Rating: NC-17 Word Count: 62K Warnings: Protective!Jensen, jealous!Jensen, shy!Jared, barebacking, Mpreg (top!Jensen and bottom!Jared). Prompt: For Celia Forrester, Marcus Black—her brother's best friend—was always totally off-limits. Especially after The Night That Nearly Happened. It was years ago, but Celia remembers it for all the worst reasons! But now, Marcus is back in the picture—he's the best man at her brother's wedding and more gorgeous than ever!It's all kinds of inappropriate, but giving in to temptation looks like the best way for Celia to get Marcus out of her system. But their one night comes with consequences. And this time, it won't be fifteen years until they have to face them…but nine months! Summary: Six years ago, Jared Padalecki almost had the best night of his life with his brother’s best friend — and long time crush—, Jensen Ackles. Or that was until Jensen ruined everything arguing that he couldn’t get involved with his best friend’s little brother, unintentionally breaking Jared’s heart and his will to stick around after being rejected.Jared uprooted and moved to New York, vowing to never cross paths with Jensen again. Sadly, his efforts go to hell when Jeff and Adrianne’s wedding invitation arrives attached with a big problem: Jensen is his brother’s best man.After not being able to completely get over Jensen in the past years, Jared decides that if erasing Jensen from his life didn’t help him forget, then maybe sleeping with him during his brother’s wedding will bring him some sort of closure. But getting someone in bed after ignoring them for six years is no piece of cake, especially when Jared realizes that Jensen has been waiting a long time to see him and this time he’s not letting Jared run away.Link to fic: on Ao3 Link to art: on LiveJournal Title: Forever, Texas Author: gojyochan Artist: bt_kady Pairing: Jared/Jensen Rating: NC-17 Word Count: 23K Warnings: angsty pining, past infidelity (not on one another), implied homophobia, anxiety/depression, topIjared, bottomIjensen Prompt: Her Forever Cowboy: The minute he lays eyes on Forever's new doctor, Brett Murphy knows the town—and he—won't be the same. Alisha Cordell is raising the temperature of every male within miles. But the big-city blonde isn't looking to put down roots. The saloon owner and rancher will just have to change the reticent lady doc's mind. A week after she caught her fiancé cheating, Alisha was on a train headed for a Texas town that was barely a blip on the map. So she's stunned at how fast the place is growing on her. That includes the sexy cowboy with the sassy smile and easy-going charm. Brett's also been burned by love, but he's eager for a second chance…with Alisha. Is she ready to make Brett—and Forever—part of her long-term plans? Forever, Texas. Where romance lasts a lifetime. Summary: Doctor Jensen Ackles leaves Dallas to take over a practice in the sleepy town of Forever, Texas. He’s still recovering from a long-term relationship with a married co-worker that ended badly and is looking for a fresh start. When he meets gorgeous rancher Jared Padalecki, Jensen quickly finds that his chance at a clean slate might be in jeopardy. Jared isn’t sure what to make of Jensen or what he’s feeling for the handsome doctor and their complicated relationship gets off to very a rocky start. They say opposites attract but is it possible for both men to get over their personal hang ups and make things work? Link to fic: on Ao3 (art embedded in fic) Title: Noction Auction Author: siriala Pairing: Jared/Jensen Rating: NC-17 Word Count: 12K Warnings: I tried to keep it pretty light and fun but still, there's reference to human trafficking on a planet that is all about auctions, virgin bottom!Jared forced into marriage, a particular form of addiction (of which the fic doesn't pretend to offer a real depiction at all), and a weird justice system. Prompt: When Mary Smith’s corrupt, debt-ridden brother drags her to a seedy pub to sell her virtue to the highest bidder, Alasdair Thornham leaps to the rescue. Of course the marquess is far from perfect husband material. Although he is exceedingly handsome, with a perfect, strong body, chiseled jaw, and piercing green eyes, Alasdair is also too fond of opium, preferring delirium to reality. Still, he has come to Mary’s aid, and now she intends to return the favor. She will show him that he is not evil, just troubled.Mary was a damsel in need of a hero, but Alasdair’s plan is shortsighted. He never foresaw her desire to save him from himself. Alasdair is quite at home in his private torment, until this angel proves that a heart still beats in his broken soul. The devil may have kept her from hell, but will Mary’s good intentions lead them back to the brink—or to heaven in each other’s arms?Summary: Noction was supposed to be a simple trip for Jared, not a place to be sold and married to a dashing but shifty stranger. Link to fic: on Ao3 Title: Eye of the beholder Author: dont_hate_me01 Artist: phoenix1966 Pairing: Jared/Jensen Rating: NC-17 Word Count: 42K Warnings: language, child abuse, violence, amneasia, top!Jensen, bottom!Jared Prompt: See no evilStevie Falcioni: She walked in on a murder and escaped with her life but not her vision. If she regains her sight, she can identify the man who killed her friend and attached her. If she regains her sight, she can see for the first time the face of the man she's falling in love with. Allister Quaid: He'd been convicted of a crime he didn't commit. Now, five years later, he's out of jail, trying to rebuild his life. But when his partner is murdered, Allister is set up as the fall guy for the second time.Just Allister's luck to fall madly in love with the one woman who can send him back to jail this time for life!Summary: Being an investigative journalist meant spending hours on a story; sometimes even placing yourself in mortal danger. The story he was following was no different, except that it was and Jared ended up being blinded and suffering from amnesia. He has no idea of who his attacker was or if he would end up being blind permanently.Jensen didn't mean to attack the lanky man, and he had all the intention to go and apologize until he saw the police and the lead detective talking attempted murder, while the doctors discussed their patient's lost of eyesight. It scared him and with his shady past, he did the only thing he could do and he ran.But fate intervened and when someone tried to kill Jared, and it was up to Jensen to keep Jared safe. When things became hairy both men realize that they have to place their trust into each other if they wanted to get out alive. Will Jared's sight and memories return, will Jensen be able to get past the guilt he was carrying around and will they finally open up and tell each other they are in love?Link to fic: on Ao3 Link to art: on LiveJournal Title: How Much For Love? Author: abeautifullie3 Pairing: Jared/Jensen Rating: NC-17 Word Count: 6K Warnings: Public sex. Schmoopy ending? Prompt: Marriage on His TermsNick Evans needs a wife to secure an inheritance. He doesn’t need any kind of romantic involvement, and so he proposes marriage to the first woman he meets Shelby Wright. She’s shocked, of course, but Nick can be very persuasive. And as he points out, Shelby runs an odd-job business can’t she view marriage as just a temporary assignment?Only, Nick’s beginning to realize that Shelby Wright is the sweetest business deal he’s ever handled. Too bad the terms of their agreement don’t cover falling in love!Summary: Confirmed bachelor Jensen has one week to get married, or lose the company he’s struggled to make his way to the top of. 6’ plus of boy-next-door Adonis, working odd jobs to get by and save for college, just might be his answer...to more than he expected. Link to fic: on Ao3 Title: Honeymoon For One Author: brokenhighways Pairing: Jared/Jensen Rating: PG-13 Word Count: 8K Warnings: mentions of cheating, possible unrealisic portrayal of the publishing world, lol. Prompt: To escape local gossip, jilted bride Michelle Bradford embarks on her honeymoon cruise —alone. Coaxed by a thrill seeking hunk she never expects to see again, she slowly sheds her good girl persona to have some well-deserved fun.But unlike Vegas, what happens on the high seas doesn't always stay there.Summary: To escape local gossip, jilted groom Jared Padalecki embarks on his honeymoon cruise —alone. Coaxed by a thrill seeking hunk he never expects to see again, he slowly sheds his good guy persona to have some well-deserved fun. But unlike Vegas, what happens on the high seas doesn't always stay there. Link to fic: on Ao3 Title: Desolation Peak Author: zubeneschamali Pairing: Jared/Jensen Rating: NC-17 Word Count: 10K Warnings: None listed Prompt: FBI agent Luke Campbell has never been more determined to catch the serial killer who's eluded him for two years. Because this time the monster is after Julie, the ex he walked out on when he returned from Iraq, emotionally scarred and burdened by a secret. Now Luke will do anything—even risk his life—to protect Julie and regain her trust. But it's a tense race against time. Defying FBI rules, Luke keeps Julie by his side throughout a harrowing chase. Once they're finally at a safe house, it's clear to him that the passion they once shared hasn't cooled. Can Luke redeem himself and keep evil away from the woman he refuses to let go of again? Summary: It's been months since Jensen and Jared went their separate ways, deciding that some things just weren't meant to be. But when danger strikes again, and Jared is the only one who can protect him, will Jensen change his mind? Link to fic: on LiveJournal Title: Honest Mistake Author: sweetspicyhot Pairing: Jared/Jensen Rating: PG-13 Word Count: 6K Warnings: None listed Prompt: Getting caught in her wedding dress by her drop-dead-gorgeous ex-husband is Reese Michael's worst nightmare. Especially when her perfect-on-paper fiancé then cancels their wedding!Reese has spent years trying to forget how her marriage to Mason Hicks crashed and burned—yes, their chemistry was incredible, but a girl can't live on lust alone! And what's a jilted bride supposed to do when the one man she could never forget is back in her life, as irresistible as ever? Mason might be her own personal brand of Kryptonite, but surely life is meant to be lived a little dangerously…?Summary: Jensen arrives in town for his ex-husband’s wedding. He tries to avoid those closest to him in an attempt to make the event as painless as possible. Link to fic: on LiveJournal Title: The Waters and the Wild: Part 1 - Primroses Author: cleflink Artist: siennavie Pairing: Jared/Jensen (pre-slash) Rating: PG Word Count: 4K Warnings: some swearing, tongue-in-cheek mentions of Jensen having a stalker Prompt: Something has always felt slightly off in Meghan's life, ever since her father disappeared before her eyes when she was six. She has never quite fit in at school or at home.When a dark stranger begins watching her from afar, and her prankster best friend becomes strangely protective of her, Meghan senses that everything she's known is about to change.But she could never have guessed the truth - that she is the daughter of a mythical faery king and is a pawn in a deadly war. Now Meghan will learn just how far she'll go to save someone she cares about, to stop a mysterious evil no faery creature dare face; and to find love with a young prince who might rather see her dead than let her touch his icy heart.Summary: In which Jensen gets a stalker who turns out to be rather more than meets the eye. Link to fic: on Ao3 (art embedded in fic) Title: He Who Writes My Story Author: kelleigh Pairing: Jared/Jensen Rating: R Word Count: 14K Warnings: Language. Very brief mention of domestic violence. Prompt: Molly Jennings has one naughty little secret: her job as a bestselling erotic fiction author. Until her inspiration runs dry—thanks to a creepy ex—and it's time to skip town and move back to tiny Tumble Creek. One look at former high school hunk chief of police Ben Lawson and Molly is back in business. The only problem now is that Molly may have to let the cat out of the bag about her chosen profession, and straitlaced Ben will definitely not approve.… Summary: After his last book flops and he breaks up with his boyfriend, Jensen moves back to his hometown of Brookgreen, California, to start over. His plans to take a break from writing (and dating!) veer off-course, however, when Jensen’s best friend introduces him to Jared, the new deputy sheriff in town, who immediately reignites Jensen's creativity along with his desire. Now it's up to Jensen to decide which he wants more: a successful book or a relationship with the man of his dreams. Link to fic: on Ao3 Title: Ginger Snap Author: tebtosca Artist: lightthesparks Pairing: Jared/Jensen Rating: R Word Count: 5K (so far) Warnings: none listed Prompt: Jamie McCoy is the ultimate guy. His syndicated column, "Guy Stuff," keeps thousands of men in a macho frame of mind. But the day Jamie finds Samantha on his doorstep, his life changes drastically.Samantha is a baby and Samantha is a girl. What, after all, does Jamie really know about either? But more important, Samantha is his daughter, so he phones Allison Winslow, a nurse who runs the Daddy School, for advice. But when he actually meets Allison, he finds he wants much more than her assistance.Summary: Jensen Ackles is a true man's man. Writer of the popular column "The Alpha Way", Jensen is more familiar with champagne and caviar than with diapers and dolls. So when a child - his child - is unexpectedly dropped into his life, he's completely out of his element. Link to fic: on Ao3 Link to art: on LiveJournal Title: Of Dogs and Puppy Dog Eyes Author: hafireika Pairing: Jared/Jensen Rating: T Word Count: 28K Warnings: None listed Prompt: For Nina Askew, turning forty means freedom--from the ex-husband, freedom from their stuffy suburban home, freedom to focus on what she wants for a change. And what she wants is something her ex always vetoed--a puppy. A bouncy, adorable puppy. Instead she gets...Fred.Overweight, middle-aged, a bit smelly and obviously depressed, Fred is light-years from perky. But he does manage to put Nina in the path of Alex Moore, her gorgeous, younger-by-a-decade neighbor.Alex seems perfect--he's a sexy, seemingly sane, surprisingly single E.R. doctor--but the age gap convinces Nina that anyone but Alex would be better relationship material. But with every silver-haired stiff she dates, the more she suspects it's the young, dog-loving doc she wants to sit and stay. Summary: Graphic novels author and self proclaimed introvert Jensen Ackles is recently divorced and is not looking for a relationship. All he wants to do is focus on himself and pretend his problems don't exist. Part of that plan is to get a new home in the suburbs and a dog. Two things happen that completely destroy this plan of Jensen's: 1. He gets a dog. 2. He gets a Jared. Link to fic: on Ao3

Supernatural

Title: My Big Fat Apocalyose Wedding Author: thursdaysisters Artist: chomaisky Pairing: Sam/Dean Rating: NC-17 Word Count: 15K Warnings: Underage sex, violence, language. Prompt: The Librarian’s Secret ScandalFifteen years ago Lily Masterson was Honey Creek's bad girl—until she fled with a terrible secret. She's now a responsible librarian, but no one believes she's changed—except handsome sheriff Wes Colton. And though she's determined to keep her secret, she and the sheriff certainly give 'em all something to talk about…. Former navy SEAL Sheriff Wes Colton is all about truth and justice. He's convinced Lily got the short end of the stick. Gossipmongers be damned, she's got that type of earthy beauty that keeps him up at night. When threats become more sinister, it's the last straw—he won't rest until she's safe.Summary: Sheriff Ackles' old flame, a drug dealer turned librarian, is back in town, but now Jared needs Jensen's help fighting an old enemy---the Pornocratic Republic of Tennessee. Link to fic: on Ao3 Link to art: on LiveJournal Title: Unexected Pregnancy Author: majestic_duxk Pairing: Dean/Casteil Rating: T Word Count: 5K Warnings: mpreg, passing mention of abortion, john and mary are not good parents, implied bottom!dean, implied top!cas, arranged marriage, infidelity Prompt: Two months ago Irena and Vincenzo spent a heady week together. Their connection was instant, deep, strong. Yet it could never last--she was destined to marry another. Now Irena is pregnant and alone. Vincenzo has never forgotten Irena. When he hears of her plight he takes control the only way he knows how--by offering marriage! Life in Vincenzo's Mediterranean palazzo seems idyllic--but Vincenzo is about to discover that the tiny baby inside Irena belongs to him...Summary: Dean is being forced to marry a man he doesn’t love for a business merger. But rather than listen to him, his parents ship him off to Fiji where he can’t cause trouble. It’s a luxurious prison, but a prison nonetheless. Until he meets Castiel. He decided to indulge, create some memories to warm his cold loveless, marriage. Unfortunately, that isn’t all Cas leaves him with… Link to fic: on Ao3 Title: Light My Fire Author: dare_darcy Pairing: Dean/Benny Rating: T Word Count: 26K Warnings: none Prompt: One glance at the hot firefighter who responds to a misguided 911 call and Penelope Denning knows she's out of her depth. Leo Montesano is a charmer with an exciting career. She's an accountant focused on getting her son through his teenage years. Yet Leo is definitely pursuing her. How can she possibly resist?As the attraction between them ignites, Penelope discovers a wild side she never knew. The passion makes her think about a future beyond this affair…until her real life interrupts. And when she's convinced she must choose her son over romance, Leo does something she never expects!Summary: Dean Winchester is a mechanic who is quite content raising his son and running his business, thank you very much. But when a quirk of fate brings the smokin' hot firefighter Benny LaFitte into his life, is world is turned upside down. Will Dean be able to trust someone else with his son, or will this fledgling relationship crash and burn? Link to fic: on Ao3 Title: The Hunter Artist: angelus2hot Pairing: Dean/Castiel Rating: PG-13 Word Count: N/A Warnings: none Prompt: He won his fame--and his freedom--in the gory pits of Rome's Colosseum. Yet the greatest challenge for once-legendary gladiator Caros Viriathos comes to him through a slave. "His" slave, the beautiful and mysterious Pelonia Valeria. Her secret brings danger to his household but offers Caros a love like he's never known....Should anyone learn she is a Christian, Pelonia will be executed. Her faith threatens not only herself, but her master. Can she convince a man who found fame through unforgiving brutality to show mercy? And when she's ultimately given the choice, will Pelonia choose freedom or the love of a gladiator? Summary: The war between the demons and angels is over, the gates to Heaven and Hell have been closed. The world has fallen into the hands of the ruthless and the cruel. One man fights to reclaim the world he has lost by fighting for the freedom of those in the ancient Gladiator pits. His name is spoken in whispers by those who fear him but he is praised by those who need his help. Since Dean Winchester freed Castiel, one of the angels locked out of Heaven, in a horrific battle he has stayed at Dean's side through the years giving Dean a love like he's never known. But when Castiel is finally given the choice will he reclaim his rightful place in Heaven or stay with the love of his life... The Hunter? Link to art: on Ao3 Title: A Long Time Coming Author: angelus2hot Pairing: Dean/Benny Rating: NC-17 Word Count: 5K Warnings: Sex(should that even be warned for?) Prompt: To: [email protected] From: [email protected] Subject: Contractual Offer You will find $100,000 in your charity's account today, provided I find you in my bed tonight. Aleksy Dmitriev is after the ultimate revenge. Yet his plan backfires when he discovers that his new mistress, Clair Daniels, is a virgin who could not have been her former employer's lover.Revenge may be out the window, but that won't stop Aleksy from enjoying the perks of his purchase…. But Clair is destined to be more than just this Russian's acquisition!Summary: Dean needs Benny's help in getting Sam back from purgatory. Benny agrees but only if Dean comes to his bed. But this is more than a debt to be paid... for the both of them. Link to fic: on Ao3 Title: Loaded Fries and Destiny Author: vexed_wench Pairing: Sam/dean Rating: G Word Count: 3K Warnings: none Prompt: Musician Angelica Cannon arrived in Smoky Hollow, battered suitcase and precious violin in tow, to rediscover her passion for music--"not" to fall for the town's most eligible bachelor, Kirk Devon. Kirk's faded jeans and laid-back charm are a million miles away from the sharp-suited businessmen of New York. But his warm chocolate eyes most definitely put the harmony back into her soul!City girl Angelica has already fallen for Smoky Hollow's magic--now she's succumbing to Kirk's spell.Summary: Sam finds inspiration and maybe a new life in a roadside diner. Link to fic: on Ao3 Title: Deals in Brimstone Author: walking_tornado Artist: amberdreams Pairing: Dean/Crowley Rating: NC-17 Word Count: 12K Warnings: dub-con, demonic penetration and temporary possession, fingering, rimming, blowjob, minor blindfold and gag, mention of medical play, mention of demon sex orgies, age difference (no underage) Prompt: Paying the Virgin's PriceChaperon Diana Price knew she was teetering on the edge of ruin. Her father had staked his fortune, and her virginity, at the card table—and lost! To the most notorious gamester in town... Nathan Wardale had money, plenty of it, but it was a long time since he'd been considered a gentleman. Still, he never intended to pursue this debt. Until he met Diana Price in the flesh—and began to wonder just how long his honor would hold out...Summary: Crowley wins Dean Winchester's virginity in order to barter it for John Winchester's soul. Link to fic: on Ao3 Link to art: on LiveJournal Title: No Regrets Like Modesto Regrets Author: smalltrolven Pairing: Sam/Dean Rating: NC-17 Word Count: 12K Warnings: Amnesia Prompt: Stranger: I pay strangers to sleep with me. I have my reasons…But they're not the ones you'd expect. For starters, I'm a funeral director taking over my dad's business. Not exactly the kind of person you'd expect to fork over cash for the lust and urgency only live skin-to-skin contact can create. Looking at me, you wouldn't have a clue I carry this little secret so close it creases up like the folds of a fan. Tight. Personal. Ready to unravel in the heat of the moment.Unsurprisingly, my line of work brings me face-to-face with loss. So I decided long ago that paying for sex would be one of the best (and arousing) ways to save myself from the one thing that would eventually cut far too deep.But Sam was a mistake. Literally. I signed on to "pick up" a stranger at a bar, but took Sam home instead. And now that I've felt his heat, his sweat and everything else, can I really go back to impersonal? Let's just hope he never finds out about my other life... Summary:Stanford-era AU, Dean has amnesia and with his autopsy/body-handling expertise has talked his way into becoming a funeral director. He’s created a whole story for himself to explain it and he’s happy, but very lonely. At the request of a frantic John, Sam reluctantly journeys to the Central Valley town of Modesto, California to search for his wayward brother. Link to fic: on Ao3 Title: Savage Dragon Author: majestic_duxk Pairing:Sam/Dean (unrelated) Rating: PG Word Count: 4K Warnings: manhandling, possessive!sam, sam has a head buddy, character death prior to story Prompt: They call him the Savage Dragon: Rordan Sarkany, knight of the Order of the Dragon, charged with tracking and destroying those who let their dragon blood turn them into beasts. In the wilds of Hungary, Rordan hunts one such creature--along with fellow warrior Kira Bethlen.Both Rordan and his inner dragon desire Kira...and she can't resist Rordan's dangerous allure. But even if she succumbs to their attraction, can she ever forgive him for slaying her beloved brother?Summary: Dean wished he could overlook his attraction for the Dragon who killed his brother. After all, what sort of man would forgive such an act? Link to fic: on Ao3

#masterlist #spn meant to be #meant to be #2015 #long post

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theresaplatypuscontrollingme · 5 years

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Lover Review (Long Post Warning)

Now that I’ve listened to the complete album six times today, I feel qualified enough to review it. Spoiler Alert: I FUCKING LOVE IT. 9.4/10

1. I Forgot That You Existed (10/10)

Favorite Lyric:

And I would've stuck around for ya Would've fought the whole town, so yeah Would've been right there, front row Even if nobody came to your show

Favorite Vocals: I’m obssesed with how she sings “ And I thought that it would kill me, but it didn't” in the last chorus. Love it so much 13/10

Overall Thoughts: I love this song. It’s catchy and was the one that was stuck in my head after finally going to bed at 2:30. I get excited every time i realize it’s coming back on next.

2. Cruel Summer (10/10)

Favorite Lyric: “I don’t wanna keep secrets just to keep you”

Favorite Vocals: When she shouts “he looks up grinning like a devil” is a religious experience. So into it.

Overall Thoughts: It’s fun and sounds very 1989.

3. Lover (10/10)

Favorite Lyric: “Have I known you 20 seconds or 20 years”

Favorite Vocals: “Swear to be over dramatic and true to my lover And you'll save all your dirtiest jokes for me” my favorite lines to hear and sing.

Overall Thoughts: gorgeous song. If I ever get married I would play this at my wedding. very romantic

4. The Man (10/10)

Favorite Lyric:

“They'd say I hustled, put in the work They wouldn’t shake their heads and question how much of this I deserve” (YOU DESERVE ALL OF THIS TAYLOR ilysm)

Favorite Vocals:

“What's it like to brag about raking in dollars And getting bitches and models? And it's all good if you're bad And it's okay if you're mad If I was out flashing my dollars I'd be a bitch, not a baller”

Overall Thoughts: I was kinda worried about this song before hearing it but I’m obsessed. Beat: amazing. Lyrics: fantastic and so truthful. vocals: fabulous.

5. The Archer (8/10)

Favorite Lyric:

“All the king's horses, all the king's men Couldn't put me together again 'Cause all of my enemies started out friends”

Favorite Vocals: “I say I don’t want that but what if I do”

Overall Thoughts: it’s pretty. I love synth pop so i’m very into the sound of it. It doesn’t strike me as a true track five though. Not enough of a story for me. All too Well was so descriptive and had such raw emotion that you can just feel listening to it. This definitely has the emotion but lacks to the description to really transport me somewhere.

6. I Think He Knows (10/10)

Favorite Lyric: “I am an architect, I'm drawing up the plans”

Favorite Vocals:

“Lyrical smile, indigo eyes, hand on my thigh We could follow the sparks, I'll drive ‘So where we gonna go?’ I whisper in the dark”

Overall Thoughts: This is the other song that was stuck in my head from my first 2 listens. Dress was a sultry “sexy” song and this is playful af. Definitely gonna be dancing to this in my kitchen until to the end of time.

7. Miss America & The Heartbreak Prince (10/10)

Favorite Lyrics:

“ You play stupid games, you win stupid prizes”

American stories burning before me I'm feeling helpless, the damsels are depressed Boys will be boys then, where are the wise men? Darling, I'm scared (Ah)

Favorite Vocals:

It's you and me, that's my whole world They whisper in the hallway, "She's a bad, bad girl"

and when she sings

“just thought you should know”

Overall Thoughts: WOW. this song is fantastic and every time i listen I find something else I love about it. also same to “darling I’m scared” because America is terrifying right now. The lyrics and vocals are both so strong. this song also reminds me of another song but i can’t put my finger on it yet. at first I thought it was a little gwen stefani(hollaback girl) and then i was thinking cher llyod and then i was like maybe it’s pink(the Truth About Love)? Still can’t think of the song it makes me think of but I’ll figure it out sometime.

8. Paper Rings 30/10 Just kidding that would throw off my scoring but (10/10)

Favorite Lyric: “ I hate accidents except when we went from friends to this”

Favorite Vocals: “ In paper rings in picture frames in dirty dreams”

Overall Thoughts: I LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE this song. I’ve listened to it 6 times and cried 3 out of the six. This song is so reminiscent of the fearless era to me that it just reminds me of being 15. I feel like I’m 15 again listening to this. it’s like I’m transported back before all the bad shit in my life really started to happen. Then it makes me think about all the teens who are 15 now and getting to experience this song and this feeling and then i cry for 10 minutes lol. I cried typing this.

9. Cornelia Street (10/10)

Favorite Lyric: “We bless the rains on Cornelia Street”

Favorite Vocals:

I hope I never lose you, hope it never ends I'd never walk Cornelia Street again

Overall Thoughts: I was so happy to hear this song! this is the RED type of soundtrack that I spent months wishing for. (im very happy with what we got but red is my favorite album in existence so i’m hoping for more of that some day.) It gives me major RED vibes and reminds me of starlight a little bit. I love the imagery as well. I’ve never been to Cornelia St but i can picture it. I’m transported. MORE OF THIS PLEASE.

10. Death By a Thousand Cuts (10/10)

Favorite Lyric:

“I look through the windows of this love Even though we boarded them up”

Favorite Vocals:

“My heart, my hips, my body, my love Tryna find a part of me that you didn't touch”

“Our songs, our films, united we stand Our country, guess it was a lawless land”

Overall Thoughts: I loved it from the first time I heard it and I really love the arrangement of this song. I also just found a quote saying that she wrote it about Someone Great and that makes me love it even more because I’m totally obsessed with that movie. Whenever I have a conversation about Tv with someone, I’m alway like “HAVE YOU WATCHED SOMEONE GREAT????? Why not?/? What are you doing with your life because it’s perfect.” This song is also perfect.

11. London Boy (10/10)

Favorite Lyric:

“They say home is where the heart is But that's not where mine lives”

Favorite Vocals: “ Just wanna be with you Wanna be with you”

Overall Thoughts: This sweet. I know nothing about London geography but I’m rooting for Taylor and her London Boy. Their relationship is adorable and I’m glad they’re happy! This song is gonna be really fun at tour.

12. Soon You’ll Get Better (Featuring the Dixie Chicks) (10/10)

Favorite Heartbreaking Lyric:

“And I hate to make this all about me But who am I supposed to talk to? What am I supposed to do If there's no you?”

Favorite Melody:

“I'll paint the kitchen neon, I'll brighten up the sky I know I'll never get it, there's not a day that I won't try”

Overall Thoughts: so many emotions. When we got the Dixie Chicks easter egg, it was the song i was most excited for... until I realized that the song they would be featured on was this one. I was expecting Goodbye Earl and I got Traveling Soilder. OUCH. This breaks my heart and I really hope that Andrea does get better. losing someone is terrible and I’m praying it’s something Taylor and her family don’t have to experience for many many many years. I’m not religious but praying for you.

13. False God (4/10) oww sorry

Favorite Lyric: ?IAMCONFUSION.

Favorite Vocals: the whole thing sounds great.

Overall Thoughts: I don’t really like this song? it’s just kinda meh. it feels jarring to hear after Soon You’ll Get Better and I DON’T GET IT? like it makes me feel dumb. I’ve listened to it 6 times and still don’t know. When I heard it the second time I was like Oh I Forgot That You Existed. Then I was just confused. What is the false god... is it her.. is it new york city, is the love? I don’t know. Why is she singing from the point of view of the city? This song stresses me out which is a really bummer because I love how the vocals sound but then i listen to the lyrics and get frustrated. Also the only song I wanted to skip all six times. I think part of it is just placement though. after soon you’ll get better i’m not in the mood for this especially when I know there are better songs coming up and I want to hear them now. Someone explain this to me if you get it because i’m lost.

14. You Need to Calm Down (10/10)

Favorite Lyric:

“Say it in the street, that's a knock-out But you say it in a Tweet, that's a cop-out”

Favorite Vocals: “Why are you mad when you could be GLAAD? (You could be GLAAD)”

Overall Thoughts: Love it. Such a jam. Loved the music video.

15. Afterglow (10/10)

Favorite Lyric: “Meet me in the afterglow”

Favorite Vocals:

“This ultraviolet morning light below Tells me this love is worth the fight, oh”

Overall Thoughts: I love this. One of my favorites on the album. It’s like a more pop sounding Back to December with a possibility of a positive outcome. Back to December was like i’m sorry i wish i could take it back and this is like I’m sorry can we fix this and meet in the afterglow! Meeting in the afterglow sounds so poetic and light. It brings imagery and peace to my mind and I’m all about it.

16. ME! (Featuring Brendon Urie) (9/10)

Favorite Lyric: “Livin' in winter, I am your summer”

Favorite Vocals:

“I know that I went psycho on the phone I never leave well enough alone And trouble's gonna follow where I go”

Overall Thoughts: I liked Spelling Is FUN. fight me. still gonna yell it at tour. I would have liked a little more complexity in the lyrics though... while keeping spelling is fun.

17. It’s Nice To Have a Friend (9/10)

Favorite Lyric:

“Light pink sky, up on the roof Sun sinks down, no curfew”

Favorite Vocals: the whole song is my favorite vocal because it’s amazing and it sounds great. (I said this like how craig from parks and rec said this is my friend madison she amazing and SHE DROVE ME HERE. it’s very important that you read it like that because that’s how I meant it. IT’S GREAT)

Overall Thoughts: Apparently every one at secret sessions didn’t like this song but I love it. Also saw a couple people describe it as creepy sounding which WHAT? are we listening to the same song??? I think it sounds romantic and gives me the imagery I want. I can picture this love. it’s innocent and wonderful. Very light and very airy sounding. Kinda gives me a Marina vibe which I love. Only complaint is I wish it were longer.

18. Daylight (10/10)

Favorite Lyric:

“I wounded the good and I trusted the wicked Clearing the air, I breathed in the smoke”

Favorite Vocals: I’m living for the entire bridge.

Overall Thoughts: YES YES YES. This should have been track 5 but I also understand having it at the end as a valid choice as well. ALSO SHE MENTIONED RED. okay je suis calme but this song is beautiful and i’m just so happy and so proud of you Taylor. I cried at the end. “You are what you love” I have loved her music since I was 12 and now at 25 it still means so much to me. it’s been a vital part of my life and honestly the only reason i’m alive right now. Thank you.

OVERALL THOUGHTS: if you’re still reading by now bless you because I’m rambling. I truly love this Album. it’s got some solid bops and some beautiful poetic songs. I think my favorite songs so far are

I Forgot that you existed #1BOP

Paper Rings #1emotioninvoking

Daylight #1lyrics

170 out 180 which means that this album is a 9.4 in my opinion!!!!

Taylor if you read this, I love you. Your music means so much to me. It’s gotten me through so much. I really hope your Mom does get better. ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡

#taylor swift #lover #lover review #taylor nation #daylight #swiftie #tswizzle #sorry for any typos #lover is amazing #and im living for it #i legit left work early so i could come home and listen to it #which was kinda dumb because my car is falling apart and im broke #but i feel like it was a good decision and im happy with it

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moonbeambucky · 6 years

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The Price of Gold (Part 9)

Pairing: Lance Tucker x Reader Word Count: 2132 Warnings: fluff, mentions of cancer/chemo

Summary: As a sports journalist you’ve traveled the world interviewing famous athletes. You’ve loved your job up until you find out your next article is on the last person in the world you ever wanted to talk to, Lance Tucker.

A/N: This doesn’t follow The Bronze canon though some film details are mixed with real world events. Written for @green-eyeddragonfanfiction Dragon’s 3k Follower Creative Content Challenge. My prompt was “I can’t be in love with you!” gif source (x)

PART 8 | THE PRICE OF GOLD MASTERLIST

You stormed your way through a large group of people checking in, trying to hide the tears that fell down your cheeks. Frantically, you pushed the elevator call button, almost running into someone as they were exiting once the doors opened.

Back in the solace of your room you paced back and forth, opening the doors to the balcony and breathing in the warm evening air.

Before coming here you had your mind set, find out what you needed to write your article and leave, never needing to see Lance Tucker ever again. You never planned on bringing up what happened between you. You’re an adult now, you have a great life, the perfect job that lets you travel and see the world through the eyes of many different athletes.

Somehow things had changed. Maybe it was setting foot in Spring Hill, with memories pouring down on you like the thunderstorms of your former home state. Maybe it was Lance. He had changed from the arrogant playboy back to the sweet friend you knew, or maybe that person was there all along. You wouldn’t know considering you abruptly cut him out of your life.

Yet here he was again, and somehow in the short amount of time you’d been back you had stopped fighting and opened up to each other, almost settling into a routine. It was comforting to have him back and then the storm became heavier, the wind whipped through you, everything turned into a violent hurricane as Lance brought up the reason for your fallout.

Being forced to relive the event tore at your heart, but this time you saw it through Lance’s eyes. He filled in the gaps and apologized for his behavior. He knew he was wrong and he tried many times to apologize but you never heard it. You were so focused on your own pain that you didn’t see how much he was hurting as well.

Wait, why are you making excuses for him? He’s an asshole. He acted like a stupid, selfish jerk. He doesn’t deserve your forgiveness… No, those thoughts don’t seem right anymore. For so many years you convinced yourself that Lance was the enemy. He was immature but he knew he was wrong and tried his best to make things right. It’s taken you fourteen years to finally realize you had been immature as well. You never gave him a chance, you were too overcome with emotion to think rationally. You were both to blame.

Another revelation you’ve had in the few days back is that you still had feelings for Lance Tucker. You pushed them away for so long, buried them under mounds of hate. You blamed Lance for everything, if he hadn’t done that then your relationship wouldn’t have ended.

You had thought about reaching out to him but by then Lance was too involved in his career, focused on training to go for the gold, so you forced yourself to move on, believing that he did as well. You’ve dated since, having a steady boyfriend in college but splitting after graduation, your careers were taking you on different paths. New York was full of men, some great, some awful, but none like Lance.

You questioned everything now, every interaction between you. Would Lance have opened up about his mom if Heather interviewed him? Was there something more behind way his mouth curved into a smile when he looked at you, or the gentle brushes of his fingers against yours?

You begin to type an apology to Lance but deleted everything in favor of calling him, owing him a verbal explanation. The phone rang once before he picked it up, sounding like he rushed to answer.

“I’m sorry for running out like that,” you admitted.

“You have nothing to apologize for.”

“I do. I was really upset after what happened. You shouldn’t have said anything to those jerks but I understand your reasoning. I’m sorry that I never let you apologize, I just ended things on impulse and that was wrong. We deserved better.”

We. It stood out like a full moon against the dark night’s sky, giving Lance hope that maybe, if he was ever lucky enough to have his dreams come true, you would once again believe in the two of you.

Your conversation lasted a few more minutes, both of you coming to an understanding, finding closure to what happened and agreeing to move forward.

When Lance picked you up the next day your greeting was a little awkward. You chuckled under your breath, unsure of what to say until you wrapped your arms around him. Lance’s whole body relaxed against yours as he inhaled your familiar scent that he had grown used to over the last few days. He was overjoyed that you resolved things, tears pricking his eyes as he squeezed tighter, never wanting to let you go. After a few more moments you both dropped your arms, sharing a smile before starting the day.

Lance had an interview set up with a local reporter, who was very welcoming to meet you when she thought you were his girlfriend, and upon finding out otherwise and your position at ESPN she asked for privacy during her meeting.

You obliged her request and stepped away to check in with your parents. They were on the last stop of their cruise and telling you about how beautiful Cozumel is.

“How’s your interview going?” your mom asked.

“It was a little rocky at first but things are really good,” you said, laughing to yourself as you never imagined things between you and Lance would ever been good again.

After his interview you went to lunch, with Lance happily surprised when he noticed you gradually shifting closer to him. With his phone buzzing he looked disappointed as he checked it, he had been looking out for any correspondence about his appeal. It was weighing on his mind and rightfully so, his lawyer had told him the decision should be in any day now.

“If I win this it would mean so much.” He previously explained how being a USA Gymnastics accredited facility would alleviate some of the financial burden. Lance cleared his throat, trying to steady his voice, “I just want to make her proud again.”

Tears formed in his eyes and you knew he was talking about his mom. Your hand went over his, rubbing them gently as you reassured Lance, “She’s always been proud of you.”

“I’m supposed to see her later, I can drop you off first if–” You cut him off, adding you would love to see Dorothy if he didn’t mind. Lance smiled in response.

Driving down your old street with Lance felt weird, it was familiar and strange at the same time. You looked at your parent’s old house, seeing the exterior was now painted in a cornflower blue and you didn’t like it. Looking at his childhood home you noticed not much had changed except for the landscape design, with bright pink zinnias now growing under the window.

Shutting the car off Lance prepared you for his mother’s appearance but seeing her still broke your heart as you made your way into the large living room. Dorothy had lost a lot of weight, her skin was covered in dark splotches of bruises, a side effect from the chemotherapy. She wore a head wrap to cover her scalp, her salt and pepper hair nearly all gone though a few uneven patches remained.

She sat in an armchair, watching TV with Nadia her aide beside her, attempting to get her to drink some of a nutritional shake through a straw. Lance went in, getting her attention with his greeting as he carefully kissed her cheek and hugged her.

He turned Nadia who smiled, whispering to him that she’s had a good day so far. Dorothy’s cancer, as you had looked up, affected her memory and it was unpredictable to know when she would lapse.

“Look who’s here, mom.” You stepped forward as Lance announced, “It’s Y/N, Y/L/N.”

Dorothy smiled widely, “Y/N! Oh my I haven’t seen you in years,” she said, her voice had grown older, and now laced with fatigue.

“Hi Dorothy,” you said, bending down to gently hug her, and wiping a few stray tears from the side of your eyes after you pulled away.

She turned the TV off and you sat beside Lance on the couch so you could catch up with each other. She asked how your parents were, mentioning she had lost their phone number (or couldn’t remember it, but you didn’t say anything) so you said you would write it down for her.

She told you about her diagnosis and gushed about how helpful and supportive Lance has been. You read into her expression, the sadness she held back, trying to hide the finality of her illness, perhaps for Lance’s sake you wondered.

She complained about her hair, scratching an itch through the fabric that surrounded her scalp, and made a negative comment about herself.

“Don’t say that mom, you’re beautiful,” Lance boasted.

“I’m an old woman,” she pouted, “If you’re talking about beautiful look at Y/N. Look at you, a grown woman now!”

“She’s gorgeous,” Lance declared with a wide smile spreading across his face.

Dorothy insisted you stay for dinner. She didn’t have much of an appetite but she would sit with you all the same. Lance fired up the barbecue outside as you prepared the burger patties, along with some corn to be roasted. Dinner was lovely and Dorothy ate a quarter of her hamburger with some corn Lance had cut off from the cob to make it easier for her.

You washed dishes as Nadia helped Dorothy in the bathroom. She hated that she needed the assistance but over the last few months she had become very weak and couldn’t manage to do much without the fear of falling. You declined dessert but grabbed a dark chocolate bar for Dorothy from the pantry. Nadia broke off a small square and Dorothy placed it in her mouth, letting it dissolve on her tongue.

“I can’t…” Dorothy began, and all heads turned to face her. “I can’t remember your wedding dear,” she said, speaking to you. You side eyed Lance a concerned look. “I’m sorry, I can’t remember it but I know you looked beautiful. Lance, remember how beautiful she looked. Oh, I was so happy for you two,” she sighed.

Based on her broken details you realized she meant your Junior Prom but no one corrected her. “I’m so happy you’re still together. I always knew you were meant for each other.”

You and Lance shared an awkward smile. Making up was still so new but you tried to hide the discomfort from Dorothy.

You left shortly after so Dorothy could get to bed, promising to stay in touch. Lingering outside your hotel Lance thanked you for seeing his mom. You were glad you did, seeing the woman you considered a second mother once again after all of these years.

Your cheeks began to heat up feeling Lance’s eyes on you, looking up to see him he turned away and blushed. You weren’t sure why you were nervous but the butterflies in your stomach were fluttering around rapidly.

“I guess I’m gonna go.” The words fell from your lips a little breathless as the tension in the car grew thicker.

“Oh, okay. Goodnight Y/N,” he said, his blue eyes focused on you.

You twisted in your seat to kiss him goodbye, intending on going for his cheek. Lance leaned in as well, awkwardly turning to the wrong direction as he meant to do the same. Your heads nearly collided and you both chuckled softly, finding each other’s eyes again.

Time stood still, all of the sound around you became a quiet hum. Your gaze went to his plush lips, his tongue dragging across to wet them. Your teeth slowly grazed your bottom lip, letting go once your eyes met his again, seeing his pupils dark and hungry.

The gap between you was slowly closing until your lips hovered mere centimeters apart, feeling his hot breath fall on your lips. Shutting your eyes you pushed forward to press your lips to his. It was a slow kiss, soft and passionate with years of emotion built behind it.

When Lance opened his mouth slightly to run his tongue along your bottom lip you felt the fire that was simmering inside you ignite to a full blaze. You pulled away, knowing it would be best to say goodnight right then instead of good morning tomorrow. Sauntering back towards the hotel you turned around to wave goodbye one last time flashing a coy smile before heading inside

PART 10

#dragon’s3k3c #lance tucker x reader #lance tucker fanfiction #lance tucker x you #lance tucker fanfic #lance x reader #lance x you

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neondnp · 6 years

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my ii m&g experience ♥

(long rambling and pic spam ahead)

arriving + waiting in line

prior to and upon arriving at the venue, i was SO incredibly nervous to the point that it nearly overpowered my excitement. my heart had been racing all week and my stomach was in knots. i’d been anticipating this very day for almost a year and i was absolutely terrified that something would go wrong. i kept having thoughts like, “what if there’s a ton of unexpected traffic backed up for hours and i miss the meet and greet?” “what if there’s something wrong with my ticket??” “what if i forget something important and i’m denied access?” “what if i DIE before i get there!?” luckily, none of my delusional fears from my panicked state of mind came true and most of my anxiety disappeared after i was given my wristband.

meeting and conversing with the lovely new friends i made in line put me at enough ease that my ability to comprehend the intense reality of the situation was beginning to vanish. everything was too dreamlike to feel real. was i really mere minutes away from meeting my idols??

suddenly, everyone started screaming. i looked up and saw phil standing at the rail. i nearly had a damn heart attack!! that’s phil! he literally looks like an angel! i heard dan’s voice from the other corner and turned around to see him right above us! that’s dan!! he glows! o m g !! there they are!! in person! holy s*** that’s actually them!!! whatever they said to us either completely went over my head or was entirely forgotten because i don’t recall any of it. this was the most surreal moment of my life.

shoutout to the girl on twitter who filmed some of this and caught my reaction after they waved and left lmao

i guess this is what my mind being completely blown looks like??!?

my adrenaline was through the roof, but i was too stupefied to feel emotional yet. my throat was drying as the line in front of me gradually got shorter. the lack of air conditioning upstairs didn’t help. i was close enough to talk to marianne (a queen, btw) about what i wanted to give them. i had a letter from a friend and two of my ii themed d&p drawings that i made into magnets. she told me she would keep them and give them to dan and phil after the meet and greet. disappointing, but understandable. i wrote my name on the magnets but they won’t have a clue who i am. oh well. here’s what they look like:

before i knew it, it was my turn to meet them. a friend i met in line agreed to film my meet and greet but was too nervous to do so once we approached our turns. although it sucks to not have footage, i fully understand having anxiety. she’s very sweet and i’d never want to cause her any stress.

the actual meeting and greeting:

before i get into the personal details and talk about my interaction with them, i’ll describe their irl voices and appearances.

i’d say they sound exactly the same in person. they don’t necessarily look any different from how they do in pictures and videos, just more radiant; especially phil. his hair somehow looks even darker irl and there’s an indescribably beautiful contrast between his black hair, vibrant eyes, and pale skin. it makes him look otherworldly. his features are sharp. dan’s stubble is actually quite prominent, even from a distance. his features are soft. there’s not really much else to say about his appearance; he’s just as gorgeous in the flesh as he is on a screen. they were just as tall as i expected them to be so i wasn’t alarmed by their height. it did, however, feel different to look up at them and see them from a new (significantly lower) angle as opposed to seeing them from an eye-level camera angle. the same can be said about viewing them on stage from a close orchestra seat.

now, onto the good part! i wish i could remember more details, but meeting them was such a blur that i didn’t feel like it even happened at all until the next day (more on that later). most of my dreams are more vivid than this memory is. my brain was majorly lagging from the moment i was far enough ahead in line to be off the stairs, and my entire consciousness seemed to exist in some alternate dimension when i walked toward their direction to be greeted. i remember one or both of them saying, “hiii!” and dan saying “thanks for coming to see us!” i remember phil instantly opening his arms and asking if i wanted a hug. i think i said, “hi! yes i do!” i remember it being so much easier to talk to them than i thought it would be. words came naturally despite having very little awareness of what i was saying and—due to being in such a daze—completely forgetting to say any of the important things i’ve always wanted to tell them. they were both so warm, gentle, and welcoming. i was too out of it to realize this at the time, but looking back, they treated me like i was an old friend of theirs; like i was someone who mattered. that warms my heart. they genuinely care about making us feel comfortable and relaxed.

dan did most of the talking. i don’t remember what either of their hugs felt like, but i do remember dan giving me one of his awkward “dan hugs” lol. dan and i were both wearing striped shirts and he said that we were “totally coordinated with our stripes” which made me WAY happier than it should have, but oh man i was BEAMING. “we are!”

when phil asked if i’d like to have something signed, i took out a print of the two portraits i drew of them. “yes, can you sign my art please?” after handing the print to them, dan said, “oh my god did you draw these??” and i responded with something dumb like, “i did! it took me like my entire life but yeah!!” i really wish i could have seen them react to my drawings, but i didn’t think to look at their faces when i showed them. in fact, i’m not even sure if i made eye contact with them at all. they complimented me on my art but i don’t remember what they said. i'm not 100% certain, but i think dan called it incredible.

dan offered to take the selfie so i handed him my phone and we all got close and smiled for the camera. i noticed from other people’s meet and greet pics that phil had a tendency to lean his head in next to fans, but i’d of course forgotten about this detail. i was so weak later on when i saw how close our faces were in the group photo, w o w !! i asked if we could take individual pictures as well and dan said, “of course!”

this is the part i remember the most clearly. taking individual pictures was almost like hugging them again, only better because i was a little more aware—i was almost able to actually process it this time. looking at them you’d expect to feel nothing but firmness and bones, but they’re both delightfully squishy; especially dan. they’re two tall adorable teddy bears. dan fondly said, “thank you philip” when phil took our picture and it was the cutest thing. after the pictures were taken, i thanked them for about the tenth time. i remember saying “thank you” and “thank you so much” to almost everything they said and did. i probably would have thanked them if they accidentally stepped on my foot or dropped my phone. they told me to enjoy the show and i thanked them once more. i wished them a good show and at some point i think i said, “it was really nice meeting you.” we waved and said our goodbyes to each other.

and then it was over.

wait, it’s over. what the hell just happened?

i literally forgot everything on the spot.

everything happened so rapidly and it ended before i had even begun to take any of it in. i really wish i could have absorbed the moment more. i wish i could have said more. this may sound silly, but none of it felt real. it didn’t initially feel like, “aah i just met dan and phil!!” instead, it felt more like, “...did i really meet dan and phil? wouldn’t i have remembered meeting them if it really happened?” i was so disappointed in myself. how was i that spaced out the whole time? i expected a more emotional experience, but it was all so surreal that i wasn’t even in touch with reality, let alone with my emotions. i didn’t know how to react, so i blanked out into a strange semiconscious state and i hated myself for it.

i went on to realize that meeting them was indeed a very emotional experience; i just needed to fully recover from my daze for it to hit me. while most of my memory is still a blur, several small details came back to me the following day bit by bit. it was enough for me to look back on and miss. it took me days to recall everything i wrote about above. i did cry. i was emotionally impacted, just not right away. it had to catch up with me. meeting them was absolutely amazing. looking at my pictures and signed artwork elates me. i actually met dan and phil!

even though i didn’t say what i wanted to, i’m grateful that i managed to talk to them at all. i was so sure i’d either stumble over my words or end up speaking in my stupid high-pitched nervous voice. i was also afraid i’d cry in front of them and i didn’t. it went smoothly and i survived. i have a few regrets, but i still loved it. i loved them.

i’d do it again in a heartbeat.

yes i was very extra with the editing but these pics mean a lot to me and i wanted them to look the best they could

what i didn’t get to say:

@danielhowell @amazingphil thank you for inspiring so much creativity, motivation, and passion within me. you guys are the reason i wanted to start drawing again. you’re the reason why i stopped immediately giving up. you’re the reason i’ve met so many spectacular people and became part of such a diverse and extraordinary community. you guys give me a reason to smile. i love you, thank you for everything ♥ - alexis

#dan howell #phil lester #interactive introverts #ii nashville #daniel howell #amazingphil #meet and greet #personal #very very personal actually #it took several hours to write this and i cried through half of it #dnp #dan and phil #posts by alexis #*content #.txt #*mycontent

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writeyourownlifestory · 5 years

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Love Someone -- Hardzello fanfic

First, I just want to say that this is completely due to Joe and Ben being good sports and giving us amazing fan service on Instagram. Well aware it’s all fake, but who doesn’t want to have some boys loving boys fun?

This is technically rated M so read on your own accord.

In the fic: BoRhap doesn’t exist. Ben is a model. Joe is a writer. They met the rest of the guys through Rami, an actor who befriended them both.

Can also be read here.

Please reblog/review/enjoy.

They were friends through other friends, nothing more. If they hadn’t met when they did, their paths probably never would have crossed. It was at a party. A rather boring one, to be completely honest. Ben had been invited and while he always enjoyed a good get together, didn’t exactly feel much like partying as of late. Not for any particular reason. Modeling was going well. He landed another Vogue issue. Versace was in talks currently, but anything could happen with them.

He had spoken to his agent, hoping to branch out into other things. Commercials. Movies. Real acting really but for now, solid pictures for magazines and billboards were his thing. He didn’t mind too much. The money was good. And he was happy.

Sort of.

He went to the party for . . . who knows why really. Maybe because he wanted to do something. Get out of the loft. He wasn’t hungry or tired. Just bored. So he went.

And there he was, a grown man in a bear costume, singing Prince. No, it wasn’t a costume, but rather one of those onesie type outfits. Ben didn’t get the appeal, but then again he figured they weren’t exactly marketed towards him. More for children and those who were children at heart.

At first Ben thought the man was drunk out of his mind. He was singing wildly. Almost animated. So dramatic and ridiculous, but when it came to an end and everyone cheered him on, the man thanked everyone and walked off the makeshift stage, completely sober.

That was when he first met him. Joseph Mazzello. Joe, as he went by. He was a writer. He hoped to be a director one day, but for now, he wrote. Nothing in particular. Show episodes. Music videos. He wasn’t famous, but then again, nobody at the party was.

Closest was the one throwing the party. Rami made it big on the silver screen though you’d never really know it. He met Ben in London during fashion week. Rami had been invited by his girlfriend, who did the show with Ben.

They didn’t have much in common, but Rami was a relaxing soul and made Ben feel welcome whenever he was in the states. He was there currently for some shoots. Three months and then he was back to London for his next show.

Rami did all he could to make him feel welcome. Invited him around town, introduced him to different people. He even when to set once, meeting the cast and crew. Ben wasn’t a jealous person, but even he couldn’t help to feel envious while he watched Rami work.

Ben was theatrically trained, as many who grow up in England were when they made the decision to act. He never got a break or call back, but thanks to his good looks he was able to make a living with one type of camera.

He had made some other friends. Other Europeans like himself that were stuck in the states trying to make a living, and other Americans that did what they could to survive in their current climate.

Joe was one of them, though he didn’t know if they’d be considered friends. Allen, he could go out and grab dinner with. Gwilym, he’d get a beer and watch the game. Rami, well they could do practically anything, but Joe . . . he was an odd duck.

They were so different. Polar opposites, to be exact.

Ben was more casual, keeping everything inside. He didn’t get very emotional or really even invested into much. If something didn’t work out, then he’d move on and focus on something else. If he went for an audition and he didn’t get a callback, then he’d get over it and put his attention onto his next modeling gig.

If someone didn’t like Joe’s script then he would spend the entire week cursing their name and swearing he’d steal away their firstborn son. He screamed a lot, actually. It was quite worrisome at first, but Rami assured Ben that it was just part of Joe’s personality. He was very dramatic, always had something going on in his mind.

Rumor had it he kept a typewriter in his car, but Ben never got around to ask. Or see for himself.

They didn’t hang out on their own. They just didn’t. Not that they didn’t want to. Ben at first though Joe hated him, but each and every time they came together, Joe would smile and greet him as kindly as ever.

He guessed they were both too busy for the other. Always having something else more important to do than to make time for the other. Ben didn’t mind much. He was, after all, a busy man. A working man.

Dolce and Gabbana got him for their newest perfume. It was something to celebrate. And when Rami offered to throw him a party, Ben didn’t fight it.

They partied a lot in California. Far more than they did in London. Rami’s birthday. And then Gwilym’s. And then Ben landing the perfume and then Lucy’s surprise party. So much to celebrate.

Allen had gotten married and Ben arrived in a dark tux and shining shoes. Joe was there, without a date much to his surprise. He had also come solo, as well as Gwilym. Rami came with Lucy, which was to be expected.

Everybody danced and cheered on the loving couple, though Ben found himself growing far colder than expected. His own relationships hadn’t been ideal and while he wasn’t jealous, seeing a friend go on and get married while he was still stuck in the same place effected Ben in a way he hadn’t expected.

He said nothing, like always. What was the point of getting emotionally involved in something he couldn’t change? He didn’t have time for a girlfriend right now. He had auditions to focus on.

Two tv shows and movie. One for an upcoming SyFy channel show. Another was a guest spot on some sitcom where he would be playing the eye candy for one of the main girls to flirt with for an episode. And the movie . . . he had no idea. He hadn’t read the script yet but he knew he was going to be playing some hot stud.

If he got the part, that was.

But he didn’t. He had gone to all three and got two callbacks, but in the end, none of them worked out.

Less than two months left in America and then he could return home. Dolce and Gabbana’s campaign went well and seeing his face all over, in different stores and ads, it was exciting, but he wanted more.

He told his agent to find him something good. Allow him to show his growth.

He said he would try his best.

He found a particular salience knowing he wasn’t the only one suffering. One night at Gwilym’s loft, Joe let it slip that his script had been shut down by six different studios. It was a painful blow. One that no one knew what to do with. Gwilym could only pat his shoulder and tell him to keep going. Rami promised to show the script to the show creator, in hopes of having it passed along to the right people.

And Ben just kept drinking. He knew the pain and suffering of being passed on. On being told not to quit his day job. American beer was absolute garbage, but he would drink it after every missed opportunity. And a lot of them had come along as of late.

He suffered in silence and he preferred it that way.

He suffered still, watching all his friends move on without him. Gwilym got a show back in England and left shortly after telling everybody. Allen moved back to Ireland though not before spilling the beans that his own show would be doing a film. They were bringing the whole cast back and seemed like the entire world was losing their mind over it.

And Rami . . . the only thing better than finding out he would be playing a literal legend in an upcoming biopic was getting engaged.

You would think a semi-famous Hollywood couple would want to have a big wedding, but alas, they chose to keep it small and secret. Only friends and family were invited and the wedding itself took just three weeks after the engagement was announced. Allen and Gwilym flew in for the event, but they were staying. They had their own lives to return to.

And Ben would be flying back too. Just four weeks from this point.

Everybody was having a good time. Rami’s family. Lucy’s. Friends from Rami’s show and Lucy’s events. Ben knew a handful of people, though nobody really spoke to him. A few ladies asked him to dance, but he declined. They were models. Gorgeous, but he passed. He didn’t want to deal with a headache in the morning. So he stuck with his drink and standing off in the corner.

Joe was standing there too, though his expression was far more somber than Ben’s. The American wore his heart on his sleeve and while it was a stupid thing, he commended Joe for even showing up.

Lucy was a natural beauty, that wasn’t hard to see. She had the personality of an angel and the way she and Joe would get along was just electric. She and Rami belonged together, but there was no surprise in seeing how utterly shattered Joe was once they tied the knot.

“Do you want to go somewhere?” Ben asked him, deciding to the kind thin and remove the poor bastard from the event. They hadn’t even served cake yet and they were literally dressed to the nines, but that didn’t matter.

Joe agreed and they went out to the back of the venue. It was closed off. No other guest would dare leave but neither seemed to care. They ate together and drank, sulking in their sorrows.

“I’m happy for them,” Joe confessed.

And Ben believed him. Lifting his hand, he placed it on Joe’s shoulder, squeezing it tightly. “She’s a great girl. But there are a lot of great girls in LA.” He reassured him.

Joe turned his head to face him, a look of confusion sprayed across his face. “Okay?” He asked bluntly.

“Loving another man’s girl . . . it’s hard, I take it. You will be all right, mate.”

Joe moved slowly then, his brow arching. After a long moment, it seemed the words and their meaning finally clicked. Suddenly, he began laughing. It was humorous, but also bitter. Lifeless really.

“I don’t . . . not Lucy. It’s not that.” Joe told him. “It’s not Her.” He added carefully.

Ben, utterly stumped for a moment, blinked at his words. Clearing his throat, he adjusted his sitting. It was a new world and California brought on several new things. Not like gay people didn’t exist to Ben. For fuck sake, he was a male model, he had met dozens of them, but that didn’t mean he could just assume who felt what for which person.

“Well, . . . loving a woman’s guy isn’t very easy either?” He offered helplessly.

Joe scoffed, pushing off the bench they had been occupying. He placed his right hand on his lip as he swiftly began to pace to and through. “Not him either.” He expressed sharply. “It’s just . . . all this!”

“This?”

“Allen is married. Gwilym is off living his room in Europe. Rami — in two years from now, he will be an Oscar-nominated actor — married to a gorgeous model who will probably be pregnant with their first child. And me? I can’t get a single studio to look at my script. Not one.”

“Ah.”

“I’m not jealous,” Joe swore. Both hands on his hips, his head pointed down. “I’m just tired of waiting for it to be my turn, you know?”

Ben bobbed his head, his hand tightening over his bottle. He understood exactly what Joe felt. He knew he should have been grateful for the chances he had been given at this point, but that didn’t change the fact that he longed for more. To be more than just the pretty face.

For more scripts where he played somebody other than the hot stud or objection of someone's affections. He wanted a script with meaning, with depth.

Standing to his feet, he crossed a few yards where Joe was standing and sulking and placed his hands on his shoulder’s. “You are a good writer.” He told him, looking at him directly in the eye. “And you’re going to make an amazing film one day. You — Joe Mazzello — will be the Oscar-nominated person. Writer. Director. Whichever.”

Joe laughed again, turning his head away. Ben shook his shoulders, making him look his way. “Laugh all you want, but it’s true. You will do great things, Joe.”

There was a quiet moment between them. Their eyes locked and a feeling of excitement mixed with fantasy-filled the air. Ben had never thought of himself very highly, despite the things people had said. Yet he refused to believe that Joe was anything less than amazing.

They weren’t the best of friends, but Ben believed in him, the same way he believed in Rami and Allen and Gwilym and even Lucy. He knew his friends were talented and he downright refused to allow one of them to think less of themselves.

Even if he couldn’t think highly of himself.

“And you, Ben Hardy,” Joe replied back, his hands lifting up to cup his face. He held him still, his head tilted forward so their foreheads were touching. It was an intimate gesture, one Ben had never expected from any of his friends. “You are going be one hell of a movie star,”

That got Ben laughing. A kind, playful chuckle, escaping his lips. Joe mimicked the sound until they were both standing there, holding onto one another, smiling and laughing at their respected statements.

It was a ridiculous sight, Ben was sure of it. Two grown them, wrapping up in one another. The only thing that could make it wilder was if they closed the gap between them, which is exactly what Joe did.

In an instant, their smiles were gone, wiped away when Joe pressed his lips to Ben’s. It wasn’t excessively wild or spontaneous, but it caught Ben off regardless. He remained still, his eyes shut as Joe’s thumb ran across his cheek gently.

When Joe pulled away, Ben opened his eyes, finding the other man staring back at him. His expression was anxious as he waited for Ben to make a move. There were only two expected of him. To push him away or assault him for daring to make such an advance towards him. Or two, accept what happened and move on from it.

Ben chose the latter, closing the gap once again so they could make the proper adjustments. Ben’s hand slid around the back of Joe’s neck, adjusting him so his head was slightly tilted upwards. Joe’s hands made their way skyward and meshed into Ben’s blond hair.

Ben’s second hand traveled down and bunched at the back of Joe’s suit jacket. He pulled him in tightly, their bodies pressed together with only their suits keeping them apart.

When they pulled apart, they were smiling again. Foolishly so. Giddy even. Joe stepped away, licking his lips as he looked out towards the night sky. “I um. I gotta get to my room.” He gestured toward the hotel they were standing in front of.

Ben bobbed his head and watched him go. He stayed outside a moment longer before heading inside as well. He booked a room for no real reason. He had a loft to get home to, but this was where his friends were. Rami and Gwilym and Allen and Joe. They were all at the hotel to celebrate a wonderful event. So he was there too.

Shortly after returning to his room, Ben had a knock on the door. Joe was standing there in front of him. Gone was his jacket and his shirt had a few buttons undone. Like he had started to undress but stopped halfway through.

“I um. I don’t actually have anything witty or even sexy to say as to why I’m here.” He confessed to Ben.

The blond watched him, moving to lean against the opening of the door. “Aren’t you a writer?” He commented.

Ben rolled his eyes, his shoulders falling as he let out a heavy sigh. “Oh shut up!” He muttered before pushing him inside the room, their lips falling together once more.

Ben had never been with another man before, but from what he gathered, it was more or less the same as being with a woman the physical part. There was sitting and touching. Whispers of sweet words and harsh curses.

He didn’t have lube and figured spit would be fine. It wasn’t, but Joe knew that. He came prepared. A tiny, travel sized bottle fell from his pocket along with a condom. Ben had his own, just in case. Always better to be prepared and whatnot.

There was no thinking or worrying. Just kisses and caresses and lots of fucking. He topped, though that was Joe’s decision. He found a rhythm that fit them both, with his hips thrusting into Joe’s while Joe’s hand work on his own throbbing member. Eventually, he found himself wanting more and he pushed Joe’s hand away and worked on him the same way he would work on himself.

He felt bad for whoever cleaned the sheets and made a mental note to leave a decent tip.

When the finished, he was spent and content. Joe didn’t leave when it was finished and Ben found that he didn’t want him to. They sat together, wrapped up in the scratchy hotel blanket, their heads resting on the barely fluffed pillows.

How the bloody fuck was this a five-star hotel?

They fell asleep together, nestled closely until morning. Ben left first, having had made plans with Gwilym the following morning. He dressed and left the room. He didn’t kiss him goodbye or make him, but he tucked him in and let him sleep.

When he had breakfast with his friend, Ben didn’t tell him about what happened last night. Informing Gwilym that just mere hours ago his cock was thrusting in and out of Joe’s ass wasn’t exactly something they should be discussing over eggs and avocado toast.

When he got home, he found his phone had died and he put it on the charger. After it regained some life, he saw he had a text message from a number he didn’t know.

It didn’t take much thinking to figure out who it was from.

Brunch tomorrow.

Ben already knew he was free tomorrow and found he had no reason not to go. He didn’t have to and part of him thought about skipping it. Making an excuse but what else would he do? Just sit alone, at home. No dog or cat or goldfish to keep him company.

He agreed and Joe told him where to go. When he arrived, Joe was already there. Looking so casual and in his element. He wasn’t a gorgeous man, not like Ben himself. Average looking, but the best kind. Approachable. Ben wasn’t approachable and he knew that. Sometimes it was a blessing. Sometimes it was a curse.

“I think brunch is my favorite meal. Breakfast and lunch. You can’t lose.” Joe told him once they had settled in.

Ben just stared at him, bewildered yet oddly enchanted by his statement.

They looked through the menu, eventually settling on what they wanted. Ben shifted in his seat and didn’t say much. Joe talked mostly, about this and that. Ben found himself listening to it all, adding his own comments here and there.

It wasn’t until the check came that Ben realized what this potentially was. He froze suddenly, unsure of what to actually do. Joe must have sensed something and gave a small snort. “We can split it, you know.” He told him, waving his wallet up. “Or do you not have American currency?”

Ben shook his head, amused rather than annoyed. “Wanker.” He muttered, tossing down his own money.

They walked out together, shoulder to shoulder. Joe was still walking when they got to the corner and as they approached where Ben had parked, the blond found himself thinking of a subject he hadn’t thought of at all since their time together.

“I’m not gay.” He told Joe bluntly.

It was a strange statement to make, after having only had sex with the man just days ago, but it was truthful all the same.

The other male paused, taking in the words. And then he shrugged and continued walking. “Okay.” He told him, crossing the road carefully. Leaving Ben behind as he did.

Ben watched him go, finally snapping from his trance so he could turn the corner and go to his car.

He didn’t speak to Joe for another few days after that. Not because he didn’t want to, but for once in his life, he found himself somewhat busy. Normally he would make excuses for his schedule, but this time around he actually had things going on.

Finalizing on the loft, making sure it was in mint condition when he left. The last thing he needed was to be billed for something that he had broke without realizing it. He was going through his things, deciding what he wanted to bring back to London and what he should leave behind. He made a small box of things he wanted to give his friends, but aside from that, he was rather clueless.

He found the number in his phone, still unsaved with just three messages from it. He decided to be an old school and call the man. He came over within the hour and was absolutely baffled by the mess that Ben was living in.

He tried to explain himself, insist that he was normally a very tidy person and it was just the situation that was causing his home to be more cluttered than usual. Joe didn’t push and instead took it in stride, helping him on what he should keep and what he should donate.

“Like that Netflix special. What sparks joy, Ben? What does not spark joy?” Joe reached forward, grabbing a random item. “Joy? Happiness?”

“That's literally an apron,” Ben replied, feeling no spark towards the item.

“Do you use it often?”

Ben shook his head. “Free swag from a layout I did. Men dressed in provocative clothing.”

“How fun.” Joe tossed it to the right.

He decided anything going to the right was to be given to charity, while anything on the left got to stay. They went back and forth, finding things that sparked joy and things that did not spark joy. He came up with a few things he wanted to bring along with him, like little trinkets he had picked up while being in the states. His plan was to send them prior to him leaving and have his family hold onto them until he got settled in.

Most things that weren’t going back with him were clothing and anything too large to keep. Art pieces he bought to spice up the loft, outfits he rarely he worn. There was a small sculpture he was giving to Rami. Several books he planned on giving to Gwilym, which he will leave with Rami to give to the man when he returned from his work. He had already given Allen a small collection of random things he knew the Irish man could appreciate.

Now all that was left were the old films he had bought during his time here. Ben was an old soul, though he didn’t show it often. His agent had gifted him with a projector and a couple of hard printed movie reels. He said it was the best way to experience a film, by watching how it was originally meant to be seen.

Ben had yet to try it out, but he got himself a few different choices to watch on the makeshift screen. To be completely honest he didn’t know how to set the thing up, but Joe was more than capable. The man practically spazzed out overseeing it all and promptly dropped what he was holding so he could put it together for them.

Ben watched, amused and surprisingly charmed by how bloody giddy the man was at watching an old movie.

Joe chose Singin in the Rain. Apparently, it was one of the best musicals of all time, or so he carefully informed Ben once it was set up. Ben didn’t keep much more than beer and protein shakes in his fridge, having gotten rather used to Postmates over time, so they ordered in.

Joe paid without question, ordering their meals on Grubhub. Within half an hour, they were settled on the couch, watching the film play out in the dark. It was different, to say the least. And sometimes Ben liked different.

Joe spoke every now and then, dropping a truth bomb about how hard Debbie Reynold’s had to work while also putting up with Gene Kelly. The man was a genius, there was no denying that but he was also a hardass perfectionist.

Joe sympathized with him, believing that you can’t always be nice when it comes to art. Ben thought of all the photographers that had yelled and called him obscene names when he didn’t do the right pose or give the right look.

The movie played on and the men ate their food and drank their beer. Ben had a couple bottles of liquor he was still figuring out what to do with. He was down to three weeks and he had about six different bottles to go around. All of which were rare, expensive, and unique in their own rights. He thought about downing them in the final days he was there, but his liver quivered at the thought. And then he thought of giving them away but his wallet screamed in anguish.

When the movie ended and the food was finished and the beer was gone, the two just sat there on the couch. Ben hit the button, stopping the projector, leaving them in the dark. Neither made a move to get up and turn the lights on. Instead of choosing to embrace the shadows from the window that the moon brought in.

“Think you’ll miss LA?” Joe asked him quietly.

Ben knew it was an easy question. Of course, he’d miss it. Part of him wondered why he was even bothering to leave when London didn’t exactly offer him anything new or spectacular. He guessed it was due to not having anything here to hang onto. No steady career. All his friends were doing their own thing. Ben didn’t want to just sit by and wait for something to happen.

He would go back to London and see what was waiting for him. Wouldn’t be the first time and probably wouldn’t even be the last.

“It has its perks.” He answered, his voice heavy yet certain.

Joe turned his head, allowing their eyes to lock. Ben wasn’t lying when he said Joe was average looking, though in the low light and the shadows of the outside world coming through, he found that average was looking pretty good.

“What will you miss the most?” Joe asked.

Ben thought about it. What would he miss about this place? Maybe the weather. London could be so wet and dreary. LA had rain too, but the sun shined more often than not and there more so many trees. Ben forgot what it was like being on the beaches and watching the warm rays, sitting under a palm tree.

LA was like a dream that Ben knew was a dream, but he still didn’t want to wake from it.

“A lot of things,” He admitted, holding the man’s glance. Ben, whose arm had been wrapped around the back of the couch, lifted slowly, moving towards where Joe’s head was resting. He traced his fingers carefully along the dark locks of Joe’s hair, just barely touching.

Joe smiled, his eyes fluttering closed. “Three weeks?” He mentioned aloud.

Ben hummed. Three weeks and then he’d be gone. Who knew when he would return. Maybe a week later. Maybe never. All depended on what fate had planned for him.

“Three weeks.” Joe mimicked. “Twenty-one days.” Ben offered.

“Good number.”

Ben hummed again, moving in to close the gap between them. He didn’t remember if Joe’s lips had always been so soft, but he didn’t bother to dwell on it. Joe’s hand came up to cup his face, his thumb doing that wonderful thing it did, tracing along his skin slowly. He tasted like cheap beer and American cuisine, a strange combination for Ben to take a liking too.

They sat there in the dark, on his couch, kissing and touching like they had all the time in the world. There was no point to rush this out. Ben had nowhere to be as of right now and Joe . . . well, he was here. He could leave any time he needed to, but he didn’t. He stayed and continued their relaxed makeup session long into the night.

They had sex again, but not right away. They undressed there in the sitting room, taking the time to map one another out. Joe’s fingers ran along every hard bump and rugged ridge of Ben’s sculpted body and Ben’s lips outlined every curse and mark along Joe’s.

He had women comment on his looks a time or two. Give his unneeded compliments about how he was created by how and he was so fucking hot. Joe didn’t bother to do that. He would talk — Joe couldn’t stay quiet for long, that much was obvious, but it would never be about Ben himself.

About the moment, what they were doing. Even little things that had nothing to do with the fact that Ben’s hand was currently wrapped around his cock, pumping it rhythmically. Any normal person would find it annoying, but Ben found it endearing. He didn’t know if it was due to nerves or that was just who Joe was as a person, but he liked it.

And the only reason he brought their lips together to shut him up was that he liked that too. Joe was a good kisser. Fantastic. Ben wondered if they had been teens together in London, awkward and new to sex and such if they would have been snugging buddies. Ben wondered if he would have given him a chance back then. Back when he was young and stupid and new.

They didn’t have sex in his bed, not right away anyway. Once again Joe had shown up with a pocket-size bottle of lube, something Ben thought about questioning him for but instead chose to just hold on for dear life as Joe began to slowly ride him into oblivion. He held onto him, his fingers marking up his the skin of his back, ass, and hips.

Ben came inside him (well in the condom inside of him) and Joe finished between them both, making them both wet and sticky rather quickly. They shared a shower and while some lazy kisses were shared nothing more happened there.

Joe prepared to leave but Ben stopped him. It was late and dark. He had never been to Joe’s apartment, so he had no idea how far it was but nobody should have to drive in the middle of the night.

Ben may not be the most social person, but he never kicked a partner out when it was over. If they wanted to leave, then by God, go right ahead, but the option to stay was always there. Joe agreed and they retreated to Ben’s bedroom. Where the mattress was firm and the pillows were soft. The blanket wasn’t scratchy and he didn’t need to worry about some maid who had to clean the sheets.

The bed was decently sized and they both had enough room to lay on their own sides, but they met in the middle. Ben’s head found its way onto Joe’s chest, while Joe’s hand found its way into Ben’s, their fingers intertwined. Ben hummed softly, some song he used to sing back when he was young. There were no real lyrics. Just a nice melody. It lulled them both to sleep.

When morning came, they were still pressed together. Ben once again made the first move, though he thought it over properly. He had condoms in the draw, but no lube. It wasn’t normally something he had to worry about but found perhaps now it was time to invest.

Moving carefully through the sheets, Ben ducked underneath and found what he was looking for. They had both pulled their boxes on, just to be polite, and it was easy to see Joe’s outline through the gray cotton material. Ben had never done this before but knew what he liked for himself and used that incentive.

Pulling down the waistband, he freed Joe from his hold and got to work. One part hand, one part mouth, he went back and forth on the man, finding himself smirking against his cock when he heard Joe wake. When he pulled the sheets back, Ben looked up to him like a greedy child with his hand in the cookie jar (and not like a grown man with his mouth wrapped around the tip of a cock).

Joe cursed softly, a sound that was so strange for such a precious man, and his hand found its way to Ben’s head. He started out careful enough, petting him gently. As he began to speed up the movements, Joe began pulling at the shiny locks, tugging on him in earnest.

Joe finished within a few minutes. He pulled back slightly, allowing him to cum over his mouth and chest. Joe found himself laughing at the sight, not the least bit sorry for the mess he made. In his defense, Ben caused it after all.

Ben laughed along with him and gave the man a small kiss on the stomach before pushing up. It called for another shower and this time around, they did more than mere kisses. Under the hot spray and heavy stem, Joe pushed Ben up against the wall, kissing him deeply as he had worked on his untouched cock. A little thank you for the morning blow job.

They didn’t have sex there, but it sure felt like it. A hand job had never been so intense and Ben felt like he was seeing bloody stars when he finished. His heart was beating out of his chest and as they washed each other off, he found he didn’t want to stop touching Joe.

Ben was only slightly bitter when Joe left later that day. There was no reason to stay anymore. The loft had been properly cleaned and organized. Joe promised to help him donate everything when the time came and Ben was sure to make good on that.

When he left, Ben sat down on the couch that they had only christened hours ago and looked to his calendar.

Twenty days left and counting.

#hardzello #fanfic #hardzello fanfic #BoRhap fanfc #BoRhap #queen #joe mazzello #ben hardy #ben hardy/joe mazzello #joe mazzello/ben hardy

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notnicky · 6 years

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Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom - SPOILER FREE Movie Review

So, it’s been a hot minute since I’ve written anything on here. I’d blame it on college but really I think it’s just because I’m so lazy. I’m working on that and hopefully, this summer will give me some time to get stuff done. Anyways, here I am, and I’m about to talk about the movie I have so patiently waited THREE years for - Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom.

Unfortunately, this movie isn’t out everywhere yet, so I’ll keep this review spoiler FREE, and maybe I’ll get myself to write a spoiler-filled review once this movie is out worldwide. Bear with me, this is long.

1. Cinematography

My absolute favorite thing about this film was the incredible cinematography thanks to Oscar Faura and JA Bayona. Almost all the shots in this film are ones I’d like to hang up on my wall. The scenes on the island are breathtaking, but the cinematography in the second half is on a whole different level. The brilliant use of light and shadows by Faura adds so much to the gothic/horror tone that the second half possesses. The visuals together with the score, courtesy of Michael Giacchino (which I will talk about later), create a striking effect that will be sure to scare the living shit out of you, and sometimes make you feel emotions you didn’t think you could feel in a Jurassic movie. The cinematography in this film is unlike any other Jurassic film, and I say that in the best way possible.

2. Music

Michael Giacchino’s score is absolutely gorgeous. At times, it was the reason why I couldn’t stop my heart from aching, and other times, it was the reason why I couldn’t stop my heart from beating uncontrollably. The music during emotional scenes would be the main factor in me sobbing out loud, and the music during tense scenes would be the reason why I would jump out of my seat. The power that Giacchino’s score has over this film is truly incredible, always being the reason as to why I felt specific emotions during different plot points throughout the movie.

3. Story

I can’t delve too much into this because I don’t want to enter spoiler territory, but I really enjoyed the story.

All I’ve heard over the past week was “why do people keep going back to save the dinosaurs, just let them die” and “why do we need another Jurassic film?”, and this really frustrates me. This might be because I’ve developed a specific emotional attachment to these animals, but I personally believe that every human being in this franchise is responsible for keeping these animals alive. They brought them back to life, despite none of the dinosaurs wanting to (at least I doubt it), and exploited them for their own gain, so I don’t believe that humans deserve an easy way out of the mess they created in the first place and the dinosaurs certainly don’t deserve to die when they didn’t ask for this shitshow in the first place. The core of Fallen Kingdom explores the ethics behind this choice, which is precisely why I love it so much.

I know a lot of people think the plot is useless and repetitive, but along with what I previously said, there is so much left to explore about this ethical dilemma. It is incredibly nuanced, interesting, and relevant. Fallen Kingdom shows us the reason why we can’t just leave these animals to die. It explores guilt, empathy, and redemption. But then again, I have a strong personal opinion and I love ethical dilemmas, so I am heavily biased.

in addition to the core of the movie, there is a plot twist later on that I really loved. I thought it seemed like a natural progression for the franchise, and it opened a lot of new doors for the story to continue through. Although I loved it, plenty thought it was stupid and unneeded, but to each their own.

Despite this, I understand the reasoning behind why some people think it’s a stupid idea to go back to the island in the first place, which I will discuss when I look at the pacing of the movie.

4. Characters

We know that in Jurassic World, Claire started out as cold and calculated and as the events of the movie unfold, she begins to change, as her actions started to become more in sync with her morals. In Fallen Kingdom, Claire has started her own foundation that is dedicated to protecting these dinosaurs she once exploited for money. Though I do wish that we got to see more of how this change developed during the time between Jurassic World and Fallen Kingdom, the way her character has changed for the better and how that change makes her the driving force of this movie is one of my favorite things about it. Seeing Claire having the passion that she lacked in Jurassic World was something that made me love her even more than I already did. Although we don’t see how this 180-degree change develops, we definitely get to see how it influences her actions and choices throughout the movie. Bryce Dallas Howard does a wonderful job at really showing us this profound change in Claire, making us feel for Claire and truly believe that she has a passion for saving these prehistoric creatures.

As for Owen, he is more or less unchanged by the events of Jurassic World, so his character development is much less, or maybe even non-existent, in comparison to Claire. The one thing I can point out is that perhaps his decision to go back to the island and save Blue is an indication of trying to face his problems, rather than simply running away from them.

For those who know me, I live for Claire and Owen’s relationship. Fallen Kingdom builds on their relationship and puts Bryce Dallas Howard and Chris Pratt’s natural chemistry to good use. I have always loved that these two characters are polar opposites but work very well as a team, and I was glad to see that dynamic again, although, I wish there could have been more time spent on further elaborating and developing this dynamic, but that’s mostly due to problems with the pacing of the movie.

Maisie, Maisie, Maisie. She is the heart of this film. All the Jurassic movies have had kids in them, but for the most part, they aren’t hugely significant. Maisie changes the game. No more can be said without entering spoiler territory, so I’ll stop there. BUT, Isabella Sermon is INCREDIBLE as Maisie, I am so surprised this was her first ever acting gig.

As for the supporting characters, I really loved Zia and Franklin, played by the wonderful Daniella Pineda and Justice Smith. The brother-sister relationship the two have off-screen translates very well on-screen and makes for some really fun interactions between these characters. Franklin serves as comic relief in a lot of scenes, and I think the skills he brings to the team are underappreciated. Zia is a badass, however, Pineda’s performance is the reason why and not and so much the story that is written for her.

The villains are a little too “I’m evil!” but for the most part enjoyable. Toby Jones seems to be the villain in every movie I watch so he’s pretty good at doing that. I don’t want to specify certain actors since I’m not sure if its common knowledge that they are villains, but I think the performances by the villans are good, apart from, as I said earlier, sometimes being a bit too cartoonishly evil.

For the cameos... Ian Malcolm is back, but not for a whole lot, which I think is a shame. Jeff Goldblum is excellent and shines in his scenes, despite not being in the film for very long. Dr. Wu appears yet again, and the one big problem that I have with this movie is how underused he is. His character understands that what he is doing is a whole other level of fucked up but he understands how these dinosaurs work as well as the consequences of what he does. I really wished that his character was more significant because his opinions reflect a big part of the ethical dilemma that the movie explores.

5. Dinosaurs

There are a lot of them and they look incredible. The animatronic Blue, Indoraptor, and T-Rex breathe a whole new life into these dinosaurs, making them feel more like characters rather than just animals for us to be in awe of. My favorite has got to be the Stygimoloch, as it plays quite a significant role in a couple parts of the movie, and also, it's so adorable. OH and I think dinosaurs are really smart, people are dumb, and so maybe people should be extinct, not the dinosaurs.

6. Pacing

Now, this is the biggest problem I have with the movie. From the very start of the movie, AFTER the beautiful opening sequence, that is, everything seemed to be moving at warp speed. There was always something going on and it was just non-stop, not giving the audience a chance to breathe and take in whatever they just watched. There are a lot of character building moments that are ruined by the lack of time the audience gets to process them, making them much less impactful than they could have been if the film had slowed down for just a few minutes. Whenever something significant would happen, it immediately became insignificant because something else would happen not long after.

The part of the film that takes place on the island moves way too fast, and I really wish they stayed on the island a bit longer, especially considering this is supposed to be the last time we will ever see Isla Nublar. The lack of time we spend there takes away from what should be an extremely significant and emotional plot point not just for Fallen Kingdom, but for the entire Jurassic franchise.

As I mentioned in the “story” portion of this post, the movie explores the reasons as to why we can’t just let the dinosaurs die. Although the movie does look at empathy, guilt, and redemption, it does so through the characters, as if we should already know these characters well enough to know why they are motivated to go and save these dinosaurs. For someone like me who is familiar with these characters and previous characters in the franchise, it is easy for me to understand their motivations. However, the film doesn’t give enough time for the casual viewer to empathize with these dinosaurs and help them understand why these characters feel a responsibility for these creatures’ fates. Again, this has to do with pacing, since with a lot of things happening from the get-go, there aren’t enough opportunities for the story to build and give viewers this understanding. I think the lack of build-up toward the decision to go back to Isla Nublar to save the dinosaurs is the main reason why many people don’t understand why this movie had to happen at all.

IN CONCLUSION, I really really did love this movie. I’ve seen it twice now and it was better the second time around because my over-excitement for the movie as a whole and for some specific aspects didn’t get in the way and I was able to focus on a lot more things, allowing me to enjoy it even more. To end things, I really need to send my biggest thanks to JA Bayona for his excellent addition to the Jurassic franchise. Whenever people talked about Jurassic Park, they’d always talk about how terrified they were when they saw the T-Rex on screen for the first time. The first time I saw Jurassic Park, I had already seen big scary monsters in the cinema, so the movie never really scared me the way it did some people. However, Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom made me feel so terrified at times that I could finally understand where these people were coming from when they talk about being terrified by Jurassic. So thank you JA for scaring me into a true Jurassic experience. Despite major problems with pacing, the film is beautiful when it comes to the visuals and sound, has a really interesting plot, as well as characters that I really love. I know this movie has been met with mixed reviews, and that really bothers me, but I loved it and I hope you at least give it a shot because it certainly deserves a fighting chance.

Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom gets 4/5 baby Blue’s

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pinksausageduo · 6 years

Text

ong seongwoo|bad boy

member: ong seongwoo genre: fluff summary: college au! badboy au! a reformed bad girl and the resident bad boy, she’s hard to get but he loves a challenge. will it end in disaster or love? collab: with iris!! @alliwannado-w1

seongwoo was bad and everyone knew it

he was in a top secret gang and had very dangerous friends

but that didn’t mean he wasn’t popular quite the opposite actually

he had heaps of friends and he was the one people usually went to for “party favours” but it was never talked about people just knew

though seongwoo himself was definitely talked about on every corner of campus

and he knew it

the girls loved him

and he knew that too

he might not wear a leather jacket because it’s too “cliche”

even if he does wear one occasionally

you can tell instantly he’s a bad boy

from the ripped jeans, worn converse, a tight white t shirt showing off his toned and defined muscles, his messy black hair, the way he holds himself and his attitude

but most of all the cocky smirk he has plastered on his face

he never hung around campus, barely attended lectures but still got really good grades?? but he visited the occasional party

where girls would throw themselves at him for one night with the resident bad boy

truthfully it was pathetic but you didn’t really care that much either

you were in your first year of college and it wasn’t bad

mostly it was better than high school

but in high school you were a completely different person

right now you’re just another everyday normal college student

in high school you were known as the school’s bad girl, you were in a gang and mixed up with “bad people”

but to you they were like family

and you ended up leaving your gang

because it started to getting really dangerous because one of your members upset one of the most dangerous gangs around leader

more and more people were going to hospital because of the feud between the two gangs and they wanted you to leave

in all honesty you didn’t want to but you ended up leaving

two years later you’ve still not been able to contact them, you miss them a lot but you’re moving on with your life

but then ong seongwoo comes into your life like a bloody hurricane and basically steals your heart

you two met at a party

the dance floor was packed and you were right in the middle of it having fun

and then suddenly someone grabs your hand, spins you around and brings you close to them

you instantly thought to kick them but then you meet those gorgeous enticing brown eyes

and your heart stops for a moment and you’re breathless

you felt a rush of love?

but you pushed your feelings straight down thinking it’s just the alcohol talking

then you realise it’s ong seongwoo

he smirks at you and whispers into your ear in a low seductive tone

“having fun?”

though you ain’t buying this crap, you were sure he did it with at least a million different other girls

and you are not the one to throw yourself at a guy with one sentence

“i was when you ruined it” you said coldly taking back your hand

he looks at you with a mix of surprise and shock

you give him a smirk as you say

“try another girl ong seongwoo and maybe they’ll fall for your bad boy charm” you rolled your eyes as your voice was dripping in sarcasm

seongwoo was so surprised since no girl has ever rejected him

well except in primary school when he pulled her pigtails while asking her out but that doesn’t count

though seongwoo always loved a challenge and you were exactly that

before approaching you, he was staring at you from afar and something hit him just wave of emotion

he never felt anything like it

everything about you was so beautiful, enticing and captivating

he just had to talk to you

even if he thought it was bullshit it kinda felt like love at first sight

but now his plan horribly backfired

usually if he did that move he’d already been able to steal a kiss from most girls

you were different though and he liked that

he liked that a lot

“what bad boy charm?” seongwoo “innocently” said back

“oh gosh please stop you know exactly what i’m talking about” you say amused by his antics

‘okay maybe i do” he says with a cheeky smile before continuing

“but how do you know it won’t work you?” he says with a heart melting look

and that’s exactly how your heart felt

he was good and he knew it

but you still couldn’t fall for him well at least not on the first night

and strengthened your resolve

“because i don’t date bad boys” you say with a raise of an eyebrow

“oooo do we have a good little girl here” he teases

you scoff at that statement nearly laughing

“trust me even if i wanted to be i couldn’t” you say some longing in your voice thinking about your gang

seongwoo looks at you curiously before you snap out of your thoughts

you lean and whisper into his ear

“night seongwoo, have fun and try not to think of me when you’re kissing another girl”

you smirk at him and walk away without a second glance

while seongwoo can’t help but grin even if he was rejected

he knew right then and there he was gonna fall for you big time

and even he tried to he couldn’t stop thinking about you

the next day seongwoo greeted you the moment you were out of your dorm

“hey” he says with a charming smile leaning on the back of the wall literally looking like he was filming a commercial but it was all EFFORTLESS

at least that’s what you thought and didn’t know he spent one and a half hours on his hair making sure every strand was in place

“it’s 7 in the morning seongwoo and i have to get to a stupid lecture what do you want?” you say tiredly

“i didn’t get your name last night” he says stepping closer to you

“that’s because i didn’t want you to know it” you retort sassily

then you grabbed his coffee cup and took a sip

“HEY! THAT’S MINE!!” seongwoo whines

“nope it’s mine now see you later pretty boy” you say turning around to leave

“oh come on at least let me get your name” he says

“you know where my dorm is but not my name, i’m not stupid seongwoo” you say sassily before walking off

“i’m picking you up after class” he shouts as you get further than away from him

“STALKER” you teasingly shout

seongwoo sighs as he sees you walk away but he can’t help but smile

you were definitely a piece of work but in his eyes you were a masterpiece

your quick comebacks and teasing made him feel things he’s never felt before

you were gorgeous, witty, smart, confident, funny and independent

how could he not fall for you but he need you to fall for him

seongwoo was going to win your heart

but unbeknownst to him you were waiting for him too

something attracted you to seongwoo and it wasn’t his bad boy charm as you so eloquently put it

but it was what was hidden beneath, the small signs of care when he was around you

that coffee was warm and not a single sip was taken from it and you knew he was going to give it to you, it was also your favourite drink

the fact he actually put effort into finding out where your dorm is

and how he didn’t knock on the door but waited for you

that was just the interaction tis morning

you couldn’t help feel all fuzzy and warm thinking about him

you didn’t admit it to yourself but you couldn’t spend any bit of your lecture concentrating and thinking about a certain someone

a whole month went by and you could 100% say you were falling for seongwoo

and him? well the whole school knew he was infatuated with you

for the first time in his whole college career he went to the library

just because you wanted to study

and spent more time on campus those for two weeks than 5 months

he always made sure to give you space to live your boring ass life

but would always meet you when you finish up your last class of the day

and of course bring you coffee in the morning

you spent a lot of time at your dorm, eating, talking, studying, watching netflix and just spending time with each other

the witty comebacks and flirty teasing was a constant

but you two had a lot of real conversations

about life, your future, the problems, insecurities, worries, fears and all the happy memories you had too

though neither of you mentioned gangs at all

seongwoo not ready to share that bit of his life because he was so scared that you’ll be running fro the hills the moment you hear about it

and you did not want to visit the past

it was genuinely amazing

seongwoo wanted to ask you out the only thing stopping him is how you would react about all the details of the gang

though you guys were already like a couple

while you watch netflix you two cuddle all snuggled up

occasionally you two hold hands too

he’s even sneaked in a few cheek kisses here and there

the first time he did it he remembered you shouting at him and chasing after him as he laughed

but you loved it

then seongwoo suddenly disappeared

you instantly knew something was a miss when he wasn’t there in the morning then no contact whatsoever for the whole day

then after you left him several calls and texts

and he didn’t reply and the calls went straight to voice mail

you were worried out of your mind

all you wanted to know that he was safe

after a whole week passed, you went to his dorm

it was locked and you instantly unlocked it by using your skeleton key

everything was like what you imagine a guy’s college dorm to be

but when you searched the bedroom something caught your eye

it was the symbol of your gang, a pagan symbol for protection

on a letter which was written with a code that your gang produced

you still remember it by heart

it only gave you an address and a change of password

there was anticipation and excitement rushing though your veins

maybe seongwoo was there

you were instantly shocked that you didn’t think of your old gang members first but seongwoo

and clutching the letter you realise in such a short span of time you really have fallen for him

but you were also so excited to meet your members again

you went straight back to your dorm and brought out your box

which had your old outfit you always wore to headquarters

black high waisted cuffed shorts, chunky black heeled boots, a plain black singlet, your old worn leather jacket and your red bandana

you quickly put your hair up into a high pony and wore the outfit, before putting some red lipstick on

also making sure you were armed with knives just in case

you left and when you arrived at the location which was a plain steel wall with the symbol painted onto it

but there was three small knobs and you twisted them according to the instructions

the door swung open and you were welcome to a dark bar

“who the hell are you” demanded a low voice as a gun was pointed right into your temple

you looked at the guy with no fear in your eyes

“wait woojin stop, i can recognise that outfit from a mile away. i got her that leather jacket and she loves that red bandana.” said a very familiar voice

as the guy called woojin lowered his gun you could see daniel’s face

and you broke out into a bright smile as he did the same

“welcome home y/n” he says happily

as you run into his arms and he spins you around laughing

“where’s everyone else? is everyone safe? why did you stop all contact with me for three years?!!!” you demand

he chuckles and says “that’s the y/n i know, and most of us are out, more people got hurt but it all sorted itself out, and by the time it was safe we didn’t know how to contact you”

“you still should have” you grumpily say before you hear you name called out

a brown haired teenager came barrelling into you and you reprimanded daniel instantly

“JINYOUNG IS UNDERAGE WHY IS HE HERE??”

‘we have even younger members” quipped in woojin

and you look at daniel ready to rip his head off while he takes a step back

“but you were in the gang when you were underaged plus i only do the motorcycle races and the underground fights” jinyoung answered still hugging you

“you rascal i missed you so much you better be safe during the races and fights” you reprimand sweetly

“i will i will, you still see me as that 8 year old kid you used to baby sit don;t you” he says with a cute pout

“yuppp you’ll always be my lil bro” you agree with a soft smile

“hey y/n sorry about the whole gun thing” says woojin shyly

“oh don’t worry about it, it’s protocol i know” you say nicely

“thanks for understanding” he says smiling showing off his snaggletooth

and you can’t help but smile back

“wait daniel the reason why i came here was because of ong seongwoo do you know him?” you asked daniel seriously

“does he know him of course he does they’re best friends” interrupted a new voice

you look up to see minhyun

“minhyun!!” you say brightly going over to him to hug him

“it’s so nice to see you again” he says genuinely

“are you still the resident healer?” you ask

“of course none of these idiots would be alive without me” he says jokingly

“very true” you agree nodding while the other guys started protesting

“but where’s seongwoo he completely disappeared on me without a single word, and i found this letter in his dorm” you said handing the letter over to minhyun

“wait wait how do you know seongwoo?” daniel asks bewildered

“OHHHHH I GET IT!!” jinyoung says loudly

as the realisation dawns on woojin the same time

woojin loudly announced “y/n’s THE GIRL”

“the one he talks about constantly, refuses to give her name to us, who’s basically the love of his life and the one he complains that he’s gonna lose if he tells about all of us??” minhyun asks

while your mouth kept on dropping at his words while you yourself were melting at his words

“YES THIS IS AMAZING I CALL BEING THE BEST MAN AND GODFATHER TO THE FIRST BORN!!” daniel shouts in excitement

you shake your head not understanding how this the same guy to be able to beat up 3 guys ruthlessly all at once and go 180km an hour with no hesitation in a street race

“guys for fucks sake i just want to know where he is that’s more important than an IMAGINARY wedding and future child” you say dryly

“we’ll make that a reality one day won’t we?” you hear seongwoo’s voice oozing with cheekiness and happiness

and you can’t help but burst into a huge relieved grin

you rush to hug him but you gently wrap your arms around him just in case he has any injuries

“you absolute idiotic moron you scared the shit out of me” you whisper softly as seongwoo’s wraps his arms around you gently

you instantly feel safe and like it was home in his arms

“aww you care about me” he cooes teasingly

“oh shut up” you mutter breaking apart slightly disappointed

“seongwoo why the hell are you out of bed you woke up from your concussion literally an hour ago and you have TWO BULLET WOUNDS” minhyun stressed urgently

before seongwoo could reply woojin gently swept him up and led him to the infirmary and put him on his bed

“i’m sorry okay!! i just wanted to see y/n” he says totally not sorry

“he’s so whipped” jinyoung comments with a smirk

seongwoo flipped him off for that but never denied it

“why didn’t you tell me that you were going??” you asked impatiently

“um because i thought it would be a quick job but ha yeah i got beat real bad” seongwoo mumbles embarrassed

“i literally broke into your apartment and found the letter, you really need to keep this stuff hidden” you say telling him off

“wow you were really worried weren’t you” seongwoo says happily totally ignoring the comment about his incompetence

before you can answer he adds “guys can you give us moment”

“OOOOOOOO don’t be making out when we’re back!” daniel teases

you flip him the finger as he leaves with everyone else

“seongwo-” you start before seongwoo interrupts you

“y/n just let me say this first” he begs which makes you agree instantly

“okay i’ve been meaning to say this for a while. gosh y/n i’m in love with you, i never believed the bullshit love at first sight thing but that’s exactly how it felt when i first met you at that party. over the course of month i fell for you and the only reason why i didn’t tell you about all this is because i thought you would leave me, now i see that really is not the case.” he says slightly nervous but mostly hopeful

“i wanted to ask you will you be my girlfriend?” he ended hesitantly not meeting your eyes

your heart felt like it was going to burst in happiness and love

“of course i will, i love you too seongwoo” you say your voice filled with affection

then seongwoo gives you his signature smirk/smile making you instantly melt

and brings you close with two fingers leading your chin towards his lips

you guys finally kiss after a whole month of flirting back and forth

seongwoo smiles as he kisses you gently at first then deepening it

you run your hands through his messy black hair making sure not to hurt any of his injuries

his arms wrap around your waist while kissing you with even more love and affection that before

the kiss was light flirty but passionate and full of love

just like your relationship with seongwoo

and you broke apart gently still noses touching

with sweet smiles and seongwoo whispered to you sounding very full of himself

“you totally do fall for bad boys”

you shake your head laughing before saying

“nah i just fell for you...” you stopped a moment before continuing because of seongwoo

he can’t help but smile at you making you want to kiss him all over again

and you ended up doing just that

which the guys totally interrupted on

but not before you said

“my bad boy”

this wasn’t anything like i planned it to be but oh well. i planned this collab with iris for ages but won’t be doing all the members. just the ones we feel that is most like a “bad boy” i hope you guys like it!!

as always please leave an anon or a message about anything love you all!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JEN!!! @kpopsincejune07 i hope this wrecks you to core and that you like it! i hope you have an amazing day work free and with friends and family. thank you so much for always being one of my biggest fans and i’m so glad we started talking. i love you heaps!!

#wanna one #wanna one scenarios #wanna one imagines #ong seongwoo #ong seongwoo scenarios #ong seongwoo imagines #ong #seongwoo #ong seongwu #ong seongwu scenarios #ong seongwu imagines #wanna one fluff #wanna one bad boy #kang daniel #hwang minhyun #bae jinyoung #park woojin

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