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#this was a lot of fun but holy hell i am never doing this again!
fortune-maiden · 7 months
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I have done it! I have written ficlets for all 30 days of Sicktember! (only posted 7 of them but I wrote all 30! :D)
Over the course of the month, I've written:
25,343 words (8053 words in posted fic)
23 Complete ficlets
Ficlets in12 fandoms
Longest fic was Day 2's Four Hours at 1850 words
Shortest fic was at 508 words, tied between Days 12 & 27 (neither posted)
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ineffable-suffering · 5 months
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Re: "You go too fast for me, Crowley", because I think I finally figured out the real meaning behind that line
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Naturally, this line of all lines, the most line of them all, is constantly circling around my rotten brain like a moth around a flame.
In addition, though, there's always been another Good Omen's line/exchange that has kept bothering me again lately. And literally until just about five minutes ago, I had never thought of relating them back to each other.
Now, five minutes later, I have and I think I just ... figured it out.
In case you were wondering: The second line that wouldn't leave my head is what Aziraphale says to Crowley during their clandestine meeting at St. James' Park in 1862 when Crowley asks him for Holy Water:
A: "I'm not bringing you a suicide pill, Crowley!"
And here's what bugs me about this: Why did Aziraphale, without a breath of hesitation, immediately assume Crowley wanted the Holy Water to commit suicide if things ever went wrong?
That's ... such a dark assumption to make. Especially because that is absolutely not what Crowley wanted it for, as he literally says himself:
C: "That's not what I want it for, just insurance."
And what does Aziraphale reply?
A: "I'm not an idiot, Crowley!"
Because he firmly, firmly believes that Crowley is asking him to bring him the Holy Water as a foolproof method of taking his own life in case Heaven and Hell ever find out about them.
To this day, that conversation gives me chills whenever I think about it. We so rarely get see what genuine emotions and thoughts for and about Crowley Aziraphale keeps neatly tucked away behind that tightly buttoned waistcoat of his. This moment in 1862 is one of the very rare ones where his façade slips a little – and the peak we get isn't a fun one. It's a very dark, scared and vulnerable one.
What am I on about and how does this all relate to the infamous "You go too fast for me, Crowley"-line? Let's look at it under the cut.
(Word count: 2560 | Reading time: ~10 min. | TW: mentions of suicide)
Like I mentioned up above, it always struck me to my core that Aziraphale very clearly immediately assumes Crowley wants the Holy Water for possible suicide. Not only is that a very dark and upsetting thought, it also poses the question: Why? Why is that the first place Aziraphale's mind goes to?
Crowley says at the very beginning of their conversation:
C: "We have a lot in common, you and me."
He's definitely referring to their (very mutual) relationship Arrangement and the fact that they both find themselves kept apart and watched by their respective head offices, not allowing them to ever misstep and give themselves away.
After bickering around a little like they do, Crowley asks his favour – and he makes it very clear in a quiet and serious voice that:
C: "This is something else. [...] For if it all goes wrong."
He's not just talking about Heaven or Hell finding out about some silly frivolous miracles, no. He's talking about them finding out about their Arrangement, their relationship. The worst of all worst case scenarios.
So bad, in fact, that he doesn't even ask his favour out loud but instead decided to write it down.
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Aziraphale's reaction is ... severe.
We immediately see his face drop as, he too, realizes that this is all of a sudden a very serious conversation indeed. And he immediately and vigorously denies Crowley's request because he thinks it to be one for a suicide pill.
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To understand how he could arrive at that lightning-quick (and also wrong) conclusion, we have to try and understand how Aziraphale sees Crowley and the threat that the angel himself as well as their relationship poses to Crowley.
Crowley can, at times, be a very self-deprecating and cynical character. He's without a doubt carrying a lot of trauma and unspoken fears and emotions with him at all times. Aziraphale at this point in their relationship probably has a good notion of what those are – but he doesn't know the whole depth of it because they've never been able to speak freely enough and Crowley has seemingly decided to keep many-a things to himself, still. They both tread the waters of plausible deniability very well.
So, to jump to the conclusion of Crowley entertaining suicidal thoughts in the face of unavoidable danger is ... quite a violent jump. And remember: "[...] underneath it all, Crowley was an optimist. If there was one rock-hard certainty that had sustained him through the bad times then it was utter surety that the universe would look after him."
So, what is it that Aziraphale does know that would drive him to such a drastic conclusion when, in reality, secret optimist Crowley only ever wanted the Holy Water to protect himself against Hell to come out safe on the other end of things?
2500 BC, Land of Uz: A: "That [going along with Heaven/Hell as far as you can] sounds, um ..." C: "Lonely? Yeah." A: "But you said it wasn‘t." C: "I‘m a demon. I lied."
After Crowley helps Aziraphale out in Edinburgh in 1827, Crowley is immediately sucked back down to Hell We don't know what exactly happened after that or just how long Crowley was gone. We also don't know if Crowley ever told Aziraphale what happened, once he returned. What we and Aziraphale do know, is that Crowley ends up asking him for Holy Water, out of the blue, only a couple of decades later.
1601, The Globe: A: "But if Hell finds out [about the Arrangement], they won't just be angry. They'll destroy you." (additionally, later in time, C: "My lot does not send rude notes.")
Ergo: It's very clear that Aziraphale seems to have put two and two together with his own angel math by what he has a) witnessed himself and b) what Crowley has said himself which equals: In going against Hell, Crowley has felt incredibly lonely before he had Aziraphale by his side and if Heaven and Hell were to ever find out about them, Hell's punishment would be a whole lot worse than Heaven's.
He thinks Hell would destroy Crowley.
So when Crowley, who so rarely says how he really feels and one of the few times he did, told Aziraphale he was lonely, says he wants the Holy Water, the immediate conclusion Aziraphale comes to is: He wants it as an emergency exit. In case things go pear-shaped. He wants it to escape whatever dreadful punishment Hell would have in stock for such a lonely traitor. He wants it as a suicide pill.
For Aziraphale to not even entertain the thought or believe that Crowley does indeed only want the Holy Water as a means of self-defense is, again, absolutely heartbreaking. Because it tells us a thing or two just how scared and desperate Aziraphale thinks Crowley to be. Something along the lines of: "If I myself am already so immensely terrified of Hell's punishment for Crowley, how terrified must Crowley be."
I think a whole lot of this is also very, very strong projection and shows us how Aziraphale himself feels about all of it. How scared he is for himself and Crowley. Of what would be done to them.
A: „Out of the question! Do you know what trouble I'd be in if they knew I‘d been ... fraternizing?“
He knows they would both suffer immense consequences and that Crowley‘s still would be worse. If anything, in a dark and twisted way, it shows that Aziraphale himself has definitely entertained the idea of suicide as a concept, at least. Maybe not for himself or Crowley, yet, but remember, he‘s awfully fond of Shakespeare‘s Hamlet.
A: „To be or not to be? Buck up, Hamlet!“
Yeah, buck up indeed. (By the way, there's a great meta by @greenthena on why Aziraphale likes Hamlet so much that kind of plays into my point a little. You can read it here).
And again, who knows what Aziraphale might have actually witnessed of Hell's cruel ways already in the past (Edinburgh of 1827, or at other times) that made him arrive at the conclusion that, ultimately, suicide would be the less painful choice for Crowley when faced with Hell's consequence for their relationship.
I told you this was gonna take a bit of a darker turn. So, here we are. At the turn. It doesn't get much lighter from here on out, I'm afraid.
Because all of this gives "You go too fast for me, Crowley" a whole new devastating meaning.
Personally, I always found it a teensy bit difficult to relate that line back to Aziraphale implying that Crowley was trying to push their relationship a little too fast for him.
Deducing that as the meaning of "You goo to fast for me" after we were shown in the montage of S1E3 that Aziraphale, from circa 1941 on, was undoubtedly fully aware of just how madly in love he was with Crowley, has always felt odd to me. And it continued to feel even odder after we got the whole story of 1941 in S2.
Because if that minisode showed us anything, it's that if you let Aziraphale take over the metaphorical wheel for about five minutes, "too fast" doesn't even match the astronomical speed with which he crashes head first into 15th base. Forget the hand holding and kissing, let's go straight to you shooting me on the first date I planned for us!
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And they say romance is dead.
Now look, of course, Aziraphale is still keeping most of his romantic feelings and longing bottled up out of fear that Heaven and Hell could find out about them and have Crowley destroyed. We've established that this very big fear of his is the driving factor behind him never trying to overstep that invisible line.
But still, those feelings? They're there. Oh, Hell, they are t-h-e-r-e.
Our angel is a master of self-delusion but not even he is holy enough to deny the fact that, if he could, he'd want nothing more than to lock that demon down and elope together into their happily-ever-after.
So, when Aziraphale finally budges and hands over the Holy Water to Crowley in 1967, I've always had a hard time believing that that line coming from Mr. "I guess there's something to be said for shades of grey" himself actually meant: "I'm not ready yet, you want to go faster than I do."
Because really, apart from trying to convince Aziraphale of the Arrangement and rescuing him from every silly, coincidental predicament the angel has gotten himself into over the millennia, what exactly is it that Crowley did here to "go too fast"? Hell, he's been at it at the pace of a snail ever since, very well knowing that Aziraphale would take a lot of gentle nudging and lunch temptations invitations to agree with the Arrangement.
All Crowley does in that moment in the car is offer Aziraphale a lift, anywhere he wants to go. And yes, that is code their little dance, that is how he shows his love for Aziraphale. But Aziraphale has never before deemed that an issue or seen it as a too-fast progression of their relationship. He even suggests another date himself two seconds later, saying:
A: "Perhaps we could go for a picknick one day. Dine at the Ritz."
So, what, one sentence later he suddenly wants to hit the breaks again? After he literally looked like this the last time Crowley drove (literally way too fast) through burning London?
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Nah, I'm not buying it.
Instead, here's what I think Aziraphale really means with this line that changed us all (and I'm sorry, but I'm about to one-up the sadness of the 1862 meeting):
I think Aziraphale is referring to what he thinks is the reason Crowley wants the Holy Water for.
Suicide.
And boy-fucking-howdy, does that change the game.
Because if we assume that Aziraphale, all throughout the one-century-long Holy Water standoff, thought Crowley wanted it as a quick, ahem, Escape From Everything, what I think Aziraphale really means with "You go too fast for me" is this:
To him, Crowley is asking the most cruel deed of him to bring him the one thing that could take Crowley away from Aziraphale for good. For ever. In case things go pear shaped. In case Hell finds out about them and comes after Crowley.
To Aziraphale, Crowley is asking him to load the bullet into his gun for the time it won't be a trick. So he can escape before Hell gets to him.
More devestatingly, I think Aziraphale even understands where that notion comes from. Aziraphale knows how dangerous their relationship is. And Hell does not send rude notes. So, I think after pondering on it for a good millennia, part of him has come to understand why Crowley would want an emergency exit.
Which is absolutely fucking heartbreaking.
Especially because that's not even what Crowley was thinking when he made his request. He truly only wanted it as a defense. But Aziraphale doesn't believe or fully realize that. Aziraphale believes the Holy Water is a suicide pill and to some extent even understands why Crowley might want that.
And yet, despite (wrongly, but well) understanding Crowley's intentions, Aziraphale is still deeply upset and terrified at the thought of Crowley taking his own life should they ever get caught. Which explains his extreme reaction all the way back at their clandestine meeting at St. James' Park.
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Aziraphale assuming Crowley's way out of the most pear-shaped situation of them all would be suicide also means that Aziraphale would be the one who'd be ... well, left behind.
He recognises that choosing death over possible eternal punishment is maybe somewhat of an understandable choice. And yet, it's a choice that, to him, Crowley has made without him. Seemingly way before their first talk about it.
Aziraphale thinks Crowley seems to have made up his mind about his escape plan without him in it.
He thinks that if they were caught, Crowley would want some Holy Water around to quickly chug before he would be at Hell's mercy and that would be it.
Crowley would, for the first time ever, really leave. Not just for Alpha Centauri. But actually leave. Escape and run away to a point of no return. For good. Without Aziraphale. To a place where Aziraphale couldn't follow him, no matter how fast he tried to run himself.
It goes a little something like:
"If they found out about us, you would choose to go where I couldn't follow. And you're asking me to pave the road for you to walk there. Without me ever being able to get a say in walking alongside you. You want to go to places where I could never join you. You'd run away without me and I understand why but you didn't even give me a chance to catch up. You go too fast for me, Crowley."
F*ck, man. I think I need to lie down.
Y'know what else that gives new meaning to?
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Alright, that's it, I'm out. Enough sad meta-ing for the day. See you all around once I've stopped slipping further into the void, folks. :')
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celaenaeiln · 10 months
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Bruce: *sees a motorcade come up on his right* *ignores*
Timmy in the back eying the group suspiciously: ….
*tapping on glass*
Dick: B, there’s someone tapping on my side.
Bruce: Don’t roll the window down they could be-
Dick: *already rolling the window down* *GASP* ROMMEY?! ROMMEY! ROMMEY!!
A 45 yr old grizzled man with a smoker’s voice, nicknamed Rommey by Dick: heya Dickie, how it’s going kiddo.
Dick: ROMMEY IM SO EXCITED TO SEE YOU AGAIN!
Another motorbiker with a full claw scar down his face: what about the rest of us, kid? Forget about us?
Dick: MANES! DERRICKA! IZZY!!
Derrick-I take down mercenaries for fun but let a kid I like call me DERRICKA-Rolan: You little shit, why’d we not hear from you after you fucked off to neverland huh?!
Isabella-what? Someone went missing? I had nothing to do with it, it’s total coincidence that I hated him-Hodges: Maybe he doesn’t like us, Der. That right, Dickie?
Dick: *flabbergasted* No!! It’s a long story! After I left I ran out of gas and then some girl crashed into my bike and sent it flying off the cliff but I dove off it first and then I had to walk to the nearest motel on bare feet because I gave her my shoes and then I met this half bear half man and I’ll be pleased to tell you that it was a beary bearable encounter once he got his bearings hahahahaha- *progressively climbing out of the car as the story goes on*
Bruce: Dick! Get back in the car! *having one hand on the steering wheel and grabbing the back of his shirt with the other to keep his wayward son from falling out*
Dick: Wait- *accidently twisting too far and nearly braining himself on the speeding asphalt*
Rommey: DICK!
Bruce: DICK!
Rommey, Derricka, Izzy, and Manes: *grabbing the front half to prevent Dick from becoming like two-face*
Bruce: *letting go of the wheel to grab Dick’s bottom half for the same reason*
Tim: *high pitched screaming from the back* DICK! Tₕₑ Wₕₑₑₗ! ₜₕₑ Wₕₑₑₗ!!!
Bruce: *struggling to pull his son in while the motorcade struggles to pull him out to sit on a bike thus leading to Dick hanging in limbo out the window of a car going 80mph on a freeway* GRAB THE WHEEL TIM
Tim: *sacrificing a few ribs on the edge of the front car seat* IM TRYING! I CANT REACH THE CRUISE CONTROL AND DONT LEAN BACK AND OH MY GOD SIGN POST! SIGN POST! THE POST! THE POSSSTTTTT!!!
Dick, Bruce, Tim, and motorcade: *furious screaming and shouting and panicking*
*2 hours later*
*Arriving at the manor*
Jason: damn what happened to you lot, you look like you went through hell and back.
Bruce and Tim: *drained, pale-faced, messy, sweating, and heaving*
Dick: *a curl of hair falling elegantly into his shining eyes* I just had the time of my life, Jay!
Jason who is well acquainted with Dick’s “Time of the life”s: ah. My condolences.
Tim: Never again. *flopping on the ground and cater-pilling his way up the stairs*
Damian: Father, this is such disgraceful attire! Fix yourself at once, mother would be embarrassed by such a visage! What in holy reincarnation have you been doing?!
Bruce: Never again, Dick.
Dick: it’s nothing Dami, they were just helping me.
Damian: Father, I am ashamed of you. Why must you devolve to such a state when you assist Grayson, he is perfectly capable of extraordinary feats without your input. I suggest you refrain from interfering with his success again.
Bruce:
Bruce: Damian, you-
Dick: Bruce. *smiling pleasantly*
Jason: *immediately sneaking off*
Bruce’s life momentarily flashing before his eyes: …..nothing. Go finish your homework. *trudging off to whine to Alfred about how no one’s gonna believe him*
Dick: *sincerely* what a great day! 😊
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istoleyoursk1n · 4 months
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Hello! I know I just requested something else, but I also have another request if you're up for it 🥰 How about all of the companies with a s/o who's really short and wears a lot of layers but it's later revealed that they're absolutely ripped and ridiculously muscular but nobody would have expected it? I think it'd be hilarious to see everyone go "Holy cow you could crush my head if you wanted to 😯"
Thank you so much again!!
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How would they react to a Tav who wears a lot of layers but is secretly ripped
.
.
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: ̗̀➛ ASTARION
“So you’re telling me the little garden gnome could have manhandled half of us if they wanted to? Gods. Am I to be thanking you for sparing me and my pretty skin unscathed all this time?”
Probably the one making fun of your height and holding things up above you so you couldn't reach them.
He didn't really see you as anything he should be threatened by so he figured he could get away with a lot.
Besides you never really tried to fight back most of the time so he found his own little source of entertainment with his playful little jabs at you.
Was very much startled when you shook those layers off to reveal your muscular frame, he didn't expect it at all. You didn't even look strong in his eyes, until now at least.
Suddenly he’s wondering why you haven't once tried to punch him in the face after the amount of times he's poked fun at you.
Do not punch his face though (0/10) would not recommend, he bites.
Questions why you even bother to hiding yourself in layers upon layers of clothing? Is it some sort of deceptive tactic he wasn't aware of? (It probably wasn't but he’s appalled that you’d even hide something like this).
Other than that, he's impressed. Who knew you were hiding your own raw strength behind layers of clothing? Quite the sight for sore eyes if he does say so himself.
Encourages you to show it off more often, who needs all those rags when you have such an impressive build?
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: ̗̀➛ WYLL
“Hells, to think that behind all those rags was the body of a true warrior! Safe to say that I’ll never be doubting your abilities again.”
Truthfully found you rather adorable since you were considered the shortest among the rest of your travelling companions.
You seemed harmless enough, but, he never once believed that you were completely fragile because of it.
However, there were times when he’d often do tasks that you knew you were perfectly capable of handling yourself over the fact that he was unaware of your true strength.
There have been a lot of times when he jumped in front of you during battles, worried that you couldn't handle it yourself.
However, the shock that appeared on his face once all those layers were shaken off was priceless.
He might have been a little bit embarrassed as well seeing as how he might have underestimated you a tad bit which knew could be quite undermining on your end.
Immediately voices his initial surprise and how amazed he is that you seem to look as fit if not even more so than him.
You look amazing! And he wishes you could leave all the layers more often if it's something you are comfortable with of course.
You knew he was already quite fond of you but now wistful glances from him would come as often as possible in pure admiration of your raw strength. Safe to say he’d never be underestimating your capabilities again.
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: ̗̀➛ GALE
“It seems that until now, I find myself learning new information about you… though, I must say, you possessing a rather athletically built figure wasn't one of them. Not to say I don’t appreciate the way you look.”
Wasn't quite sure why you were wearing that many layers of clothing. The weather was already relatively hot and still, you insisted on wearing such things.
I mean, as long as you are comfortable and happy with them he didn't seem all too bothered by it.
Found you endearing in his own way, seeing as he would often find himself craning his neck or having to bend his body to meet your eye level but it made it all the more amusing for him.
Similar to Wyll, he found himself underestimating your true abilities as you truly appeared harmless in his eyes. Sure, if you had to kill a goblin for your own survival you would but you didn't exactly give off brutish vibes.
Even so, that never made him find your company any less enjoyable.
Though, he was quite startled when your true form was revealed, and all those extra layers of clothing were taken off from you. He wasn't even sure if he was looking at the right person.
One moment you appeared as innocent and delicate as could be only for you to actually have the body of someone who's probably more physically capable than him.
You've probably given him another reason as to why he admires you all too much. The new look on you is a tad bit distracting for him and Gale can't manage to hide how smitten he is for the life of him.
If anything, now you’re all the more distracting to him, and it takes him a while to break out of that haze he's put himself in.
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: ̗̀➛ KARLACH
“Fucking hell, all the things I could have known about you but I never thought it would be this! You’re absolutely ripped! A badass body for one of the coolest people I know.”
Was practically squealing from how adorable you looked, especially in comparison to her towering height. You were like a little puppy in her eyes.
She couldn't understand why you’d wear so many layers of clothing, it's not like it was cold, and she knew that if she were to try that herself she’d feel uncomfortable as all hell.
But she won't press on it, as long as you are okay with it then wear as much as you wish.
The moment she was able to touch you, she was off carrying you around. She had wanted to pick you up for the longest time but she didn't understand why you felt slightly heavier than she thought you would be.
Perhaps it's all the extra layers of clothing? Either way, she didn't care. As long as she got to mess around with her favorite travel companion then what the hell.
Freaked out the moment you actually revealed how ripped you are beneath all the rags. You were practically as muscular as her.
It only seemed to excite her more because now she's fawning over how amazing you look and what you did to make your body look like this.
You've only grown to be ten times more awesome in her eyes and to see you use your true strength makes her swoon. She couldn't have chosen a better companion to have alongside her.
Suddenly the extra weight she felt carrying you made a lot more sense. Not that she’ll ever complain. Even with the newfound information, she’ll never stop lifting you up in her arms for the fun of it.
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: ̗̀➛ SHADOWHEART
“I suppose there's more to be known about you, isn't there? I was not expecting you to be as fit as you are but I can't say it isn't something I’d find myself grow tired of seeing.”
She didn't think much about the extra layers of clothing you wore other than it being for comfort or aesthetics. She's not one to care much for it.
You've been a helpful and valuable member of the group thus far, she saw no reason to underestimate you even in terms of strength.
It was rather amusing to have you around as a much shorter companion than her.
It wasn't something she ever mentioned or poked fun of but the coy little smile on her face revealed just how much she found the height difference amusing.
She was pleasantly surprised the moment you revealed just how muscular you truly are, even with her insight she never would have expected it.
Regardless, she's impressed with your stature, knowing that obtaining such a form would have taken a long time to have.
With or without all the layers, she still thinks you’re pleasing in her eyes, and whether you choose to use that undeniable strength is all up to you.
Though, she will take a moment to admire you while she can. She’d never force you to quit using layers of clothing but looking at you when you’re like this has its own appeal.
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: ̗̀➛ LAE’ZEL
“Just when I thought we’d have to eliminate you for your lack of use. Chk, perhaps I was wrong about you, istik. Consider my blade unsheathed for now.”
Practically disregarded you at first. You seemed so weak in her eyes that she wasn't even sure what assistance you’d provide for her.
She finds the layers upon layers of clothing unnecessary and it isn't practical when charging into battle. She's told you to leave it multiple times to your dismay.
Unless you have done something to prove that you are fairly capable of handling your own battles, she's very blunt about how incapable you seem to her.
It's even worse if you’re short cause she just has more aspects of you to undermine you with.
She’ll come off as really mean but that's mostly due to how she was raised. She can easily spot disadvantages and she won't hesitate to point out each one, especially if you two aren't close.
Was genuinely shocked to see you without the layers and what your true strength truly holds. She would have taken all those demeaning words the moment you've proved yourself.
Besides, seeing you in your true glory probably woke something up in her.
She's infatuated by strong, powerful warriors and seems that you fit the bill.
You were everything she thought you weren't and she’d come to realize just how wrong about you she was. You could have probably even sparred against her if only she had given you the proper chance.
She’d come around to actually apologizing for her earlier jabs at you sooner or later but she truly has gained a newfound respect for you. You’ll never find her insulting you again.
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: ̗̀➛ HALSIN
“You’re full of surprises, aren't you? Perhaps you never truly needed my protection, you've been blessed with a body that I’m certain nature itself worked tirelessly to perfect. However, I stand at your side in case you wish for any assistance.”
Thought nothing much of your extra layers of clothing. If anything it made you look all the more adorable in his eyes.
You could tell he was already enamored by you every time you had to look up to him to speak, the smile on his face never seemed to have disappeared.
He was probably extra protective of you under the assumption that you weren't as strong as the rest. Not that it was something he considered to be bad, but he wanted to make sure you wouldn't get hurt.
He’d end up doing most of the fighting for you, insisting that he's got it handled even though you knew you were capable of fighting the rest off yourself.
Regardless, it wasn't unpleasant to have Halsin come in to protect you despite your capabilities, it showed how much he cared.
He was startled when you showed your body beneath all the layers of clothing, even having to take a few seconds to stare as if he couldn't believe it.
This only seemed to make him all the more interested in you now that his eyes managed to catch a glimpse of the skin underneath all those rags, it was a sight that he would have imprinted into his mind.
Nevertheless, he will never underestimate you again but he’ll always be there in case you still wish for his protection. He could never say no to you.
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uselesslexbian · 8 days
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the tortured poets department sentence starters.
i was supposed to be sent away, but they forgot to come and get me.
i love you, it's ruining my life.
my husband is cheating. i wanna kill him.
thought of calling you, but you won't pick up.
who's gonna hold you like me?
who's gonna know you, if not me?
sometimes i wonder if you're gonna screw this up with me.
everyone we know understands why it's meant to be. 'cause we're crazy.
who else is gonna know me?
i should've known it was a matter of time.
we could've played for keeps this time.
once i fix me, he's gonna miss me.
he told me i'm better off, but i'm not.
fuck it if i can't have him.
i might just die, it would make no difference.
fuck it if i can't have us.
'cause fuck it, i was in love.
i stopped trying to make him laugh.
how much sad did you think i had in me?
you say i abandoned the ship, but i was going down with it.
just how low did you think i'd go before i'd self-implode?
you swore you love me, but where were the clues?
i'm just mad as hell 'cause i loved this place.
i forget if this was ever fun.
no, i'm not coming to my sense.
i know he's crazy, but he's the one i want.
i'd rather burn my whole life down than listen to one more second of all this bitching and moaning.
i'll tell you something about my good name - it's mine alone to disgrace.
you ain't gotta pray for me.
no, you can't come to the wedding.
it's gonna be alright, i did my time.
i will never lose my baby again.
ain't no way i'm gonna screw up now that i know what's at stake.
they said i was a cheat. i guess it must be true.
yes, i'm haunted, but i'm feeling just fine.
tell me i'm dispicable, say it's unforgivable.
am i allowed to cry?
i keep recalling things we never did.
someone told me there's no such thing as bad thoughts.
if it's make-believe, why does it feel like a vow we'll both uphold somehow?
they're gonna crucify me anyway.
what if the way you hold me is actually what's holy?
you don't get to tell me about "sad."
if you wanted me dead, you should've just said.
who's afraid of little old me?
at all costs, keep your good name.
you don't get to tell me you feel bad.
so tell me everything is not about me, but what if it is?
say they didn't do it to hurt me, but what if they did?
i'm always drunk on my own tears, isn't that what they all said?
i'm fearsome, and i'm wretched, and i'm wrong.
you caged me, and then you called me crazy.
i am what i am 'cause you trained me.
i can fix him. no really, i can.
come close, i'll show you heaven.
trust me, i can handle me a dangerous man.
you said i'm the love of your life.
well, you took me to hell, too.
what we thought was for all time was momentary.
are they second-hand embarrassed that i can't get out of bed 'cause something counterfeit's dead?
you're the loss of my life.
i can handle my shit.
he said he'd love me all his life, but that life was too short.
i can do it with a broken heart.
i'm so obsessed with him, but he avoids me like the plague.
i cry a lot, but i am so productive. it's an art.
you know you're good when you can even do it with a broken heart.
i'm sure i can pass this test.
they said, "babe, you gotta fake it 'til you make it" and i did.
'cause i'm miserable! and nobody even knows!
was any of it true?
who the fuck was that guy?
they just ghosted you. now you know what it feels like.
i don't even want you back.
you didn't measure up in any measure of a man.
were you sent by someone who wanted me dead?
'cause it wasn't sexy once it wasn't forbidden.
i would've died for your sins. instead i just died inside.
i'll forget you, but i'll never forgive.
i haven't come around in so long, but i'm making a comeback to where i belong.
this town is fake, but you're the real thing.
the crown is stained, but you're the real queen.
you're the new god we're worshipping.
it's hell on earth to be heavenly.
123 notes · View notes
prolix-yuy · 1 year
Text
On the Right Flight
Pairing: Javi Gutierrez x F!Reader
Summary: A long flight with a gorgeous neighbor takes a hard turn when you get on his favorite subject - Nicholas Cage.
Word Count: 4.1k
Warnings: Explicit, 18+ MINORS DNI, allusions to sex, PiV sex, brief hint of voyeurism, lots of fantasizing, we are Looking Disrespectfully, plenty of sweetness dumped on top.
Notes: I had the worst writers block for this, but then went on a plane and remembered all the fun/not fun things about flying. Plus traveling for the holidays would be greatly improved with a dose of Javi.
I apologize for one moment and one moment only in this story. You'll know what I mean when you get there.
Cross-posted on AO3
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For once, you pray to the gods of airline transportation, let there be no one in the window seat.
It’s futile, you know. It’s LA to Boston and you’ve never seen an empty seat, but you’re hoping that this one time you’ll get a little respite. You’re already fed up with having to pay extra for an emergency row seat, no other options left on the only flight that gets you to your parents in time. Then the dread of endless questions about your work (fine), love life (dismal) and future plans (???) just adds to your crankiness. It’s the holidays, you’re going home, and you could use a holiday miracle. 
At least the expansive legroom is a plus.
You like LA, but no snow in December is weird. Growing up in places where snowfall is a guarantee makes you miss it all the more when towering evergreens are carted into the Grove and fake snow looks strangely post-apocalyptic against a 75 degree sunny day. It doesn’t feel right without the tip of your nose being perpetually cold and a scarf devouring you from shoulder to chin. 
Plus you still have a handful of presents to get, and the anticipation of a long flight is making you antsy about your procrastination. There are still a couple days, but one present has eluded you this year and you’re getting desperate.
“Excuse me.”
A polite voice, Spanish accented, lifts over the murmurs and rumbles of the plane. Your heart sinks briefly.
“Sorry, is this your seat?” you ask, sliding your shoulder bag out of the way before getting a good look at the man waiting in the aisle.
And you do get a good look.
A long one.
Probably uncomfortably long.
But holy hell he’s gorgeous.
He definitely doesn’t belong in coach, and if the cogs in your brain could turn at all you might have asked him if he was in the right aisle, but instead you numbly stare as he steps around your knees. He nods with a tight smile, tucking his elbows and broad shoulders as he squashes into the small window seat. Against the dull beige and navy of the walls and seats he’s a cream and maroon dream, a lightweight striped jacket barely zipped over a white shirt. Tan chinos hug his thick thighs as he twists to find the seat belt, a tiny slip of his tan stomach peeking out. You look up desperately at the flight attendant, whose expression is almost as shocked as yours, before settling back into your seat. 
Six and a half hours next to this golden god might actually be a Christmas miracle, but not one you’d ever dream to wish for.
You follow basic plane etiquette, pretending he isn’t there as you arrange your belongings just how you like them. Without a seat directly in front of you most of your supplies remain stuffed in your bag - a bottle of water, your iPad loaded with movies and tv shows, snacks easily in reach, headphones at the ready. You do sneak a peek at your seatmate’s luscious caramel curls, the intriguing curve of his nose, the perfect dip above his chin where pursed lips tempt.
Stop it, you scold yourself, you’re not in a goddamn Hallmark movie.
“Sorry,” comes that rich voice again, heavily apologetic as he waves to get your attention. Pretending you just noticed him - very smooth, you praise yourself - you turn and nod with your best people-pleaser smile. “I am not sure how to make all this work,” he sighs, mouth downturned and brow knitted. A wild gesture to the lack of a tray table, or entertainment display, makes you bite back a smile.
Hot and hopeless? Oh no.
“The tray is in the armrest, you have to flip it out. Same for the TV screen. The headphone jack is here,” you indicate quietly, though your elderly aisle neighbor is not paying much attention, “and you can plug in your phone here,” you add, tapping at the ports in the armrest. His face lights up, then falls when he fails to have the correct cable. You’re not normally this forward with someone you just met, but there’s something about the fish out of water routine that’s making you bold.
“Here, you can share mine, I won’t need it much for the flight,” you offer, fishing the other end of your cord out of your bag. The man’s face breaks into relief - you’ve never seen so many expressions in such a short time - before he thanks you over and over. It makes heat tingle at the tips of your ears and the back of your neck.
“You must think I am quite foolish,” he murmurs when he finally settles into his seat, wincing at the stiffness. 
“Don’t fly coach much?” you ask, fighting your smirk when he throws up his hands, the gesture too big for the tiny space he’s occupying.
“Can you believe every plane was booked for two weeks? My assistant barely got me on this one!” he groans, and the tiniest part of you loves the plight of an obvious mucky-muck living like the plebeians. His face turning to you, capturing you in an intensely focused gaze, dries out your mouth.
“You are laughing,” he states, more incredulity heaped on. You can’t help the smile and snort that eke out of your unwilling mouth.
“I’m sorry, it’s just…you gotta know how silly that sounds,” you say, flight attendants beginning safety demonstrations in the aisle. You lower your voice further. “My assistant had to book me in coach because it’s three days before Christmas, oh the humanity!” 
For a moment you’re nervous you’ve offended him, the blank expression he pins you with making you fiddle with your fingers. Then he covers his face, a thick gold pinky ring only adding to the ridiculousness of the situation.
“You are right, I sound like the worst sort of person. My apologies, I will try to be a better seat-mate.” You shake your head, waving your hand at his apology before settling back into the seat. “I’m Javi, by the way,” he says, and you give him your name in return. He repeats it back to you, along with another few apologies, before leaning over to finish settling himself for the flight. The plane begins taxing, and the telltale rumble of the jets lulls you into closing your eyes. 
Your right arm is warm, pressed against something amazingly comfortable. Considering snuggling into it, you’re shocked awake remembering you’re on a plane and you’ve accidentally slumped against the golden man - Javi’s - arm. 
“Sorry,” you whisper, straightening, but he only smiles (holy shit can he get more attractive?) and shrugs.
“We are all on this plane together, what is a little touch?” he whispers back before returning to scrolling through an iPad. His is bigger, the nice pro version that’s almost the size of an actual computer. You begin to settle back into your plane nap when a hefty list of titles flash by.
“That’s a lot of Nic Cage,” you comment sotto voce, the rumble and white noise of the plane keeping your conversation relatively private. Javi looks at you blankly, one eyebrow quirked.
“He is my favorite actor,” he says, and the seriousness of this statement bleats a little laugh from your lips. This furrows his brow further, though his eyes do dart to your mouth briefly.
“Sorry, it’s not funny, it’s just…serendipity,” you say, adding more confusion to Javi’s face. You wave your hands, centering yourself.
“You celebrate Christmas?” you ask, and he nods, confused. “Okay, so every Christmas I’ve got this tradition with my sister. It all started one year when she said she didn’t like Nic Cage movies.”
“How could she dislike one of the greatest actors in film history?” Javi interrupts, now half perched in his seat and animated, hands flying. It makes you lose your train of thought, those soft brown eyes now shockingly sharp. You swallow once before continuing.
“I don’t think she hates him or anything, she just thinks he’s silly, and plays a lot of goofy roles.” At this Javi flops back in his seat, rubbing a hand over his face. The dramatics are making you giddy, a frenetic energy barely contained in your body as you try not to disturb the quiet travelers surrounding you.
“Has she never seen Raising Arizona? Con Air?” he interrogates, counting several more movies you didn’t even know he was in. Shrugging, you watch his face fall.
“She got through Ghost Rider and Face/Off before she called it quits,” you say, shoulders shaking at the exasperation rolling off his broad ones. 
“Please don’t tell me you feel the same,” Javi pleads. You shake your head.
“He’s made some…questionable choices, but I unironically love Lord of War, and National Treasure is just fun to watch,” you say, the flight attendants starting beverage service. 
“Thank goodness,” he grumbles, folding up his iPad to have enough space. The flight attendant moves to take drink orders, a professional smile following, “Something for you?”
“Champagne,” Javi says, almost off-hand, which shoots the flight attendant’s eyebrows up to his hairline. Warmed by conversation, you test a tease.
“You’re not in first class anymore, Toto, try a vodka.” Javi’s cheeks pink, but he does order a vodka soda instead. You begin to order a ginger ale when Javi interrupts.
“No no, it’s a long flight, you should have a drink too,” he says, the confused flight attendant’s eyes darting between your conversation.
“Oh no, that’s all right…”
“You drink, yes?”
“I do.”
“Then you should have a drink.”
“I, uh…”
Javi addresses the flight attendant directly, and where embarrassment radiated off him before is now confidence.
“She’ll have a drink on me,” he says definitively, and when he catches your eye there’s a sweet smile that makes your heart pound. “You should have a drink with me.”
Moments later you’re sipping on your own vodka soda and the flight attendant is giving you an approving nod as he moves on to the next row. 
“So your sister does not like Nic…” Javi prompts, your story brought back to the forefront sharply. 
“Yes, right! So after she told me this, I was looking for her Christmas present and found this ridiculous pillow on Amazon that I had to get her. It’s sequins, and when you brush them a certain way…”
“...you can see a photo of Nic,” Javi finishes, to your surprise. “I have the same one.”
“Get out, you do not!” you reprimand, the vodka starting to warm your blood and loosen your tongue. 
“I do! It’s part of my collection.”
“You have a collection?!”
The next half hour is spent slowly sipping your drink and enjoying the hell out of Javi’s extensive Nic Cage collection, complete with photos. The wax statue is a little much, but the golden guns are pretty badass. You’re half distracted with Javi’s proximity, leaned in to flip through his photos, shoulder to shoulder. Tart orange peel and the clean musk of some expensive cologne engulfs your senses. Add the relaxing effects of the booze and you’re actively trying not to cuddle up to this stranger with an insane amount of movie memorabilia. 
“But you have not told me what your sister and Nic have to do with Christmas?” Javi finally says, leaning back in his seat and finishing his drink. 
“Okay, okay, so after that first Christmas it’s a tradition every year. I get her some silly Nic Cage thing, she pretends to get mad about it, and we all have a good laugh. So far it’s been the pillow, a shirt, a mug, and a really awful coloring book.” Javi shakes his head and laughs, catching the flight attendant’s eye to bring another round of drinks. You’re pretty sure that’s not how it works in coach, but Javi’s charisma gets him two nips and two glasses of ice palmed to him surreptitiously. If only you had that charm.
“So what is the gift this year? Pants? Shoelaces?” he teases, pouring your drinks. 
“That’s the problem! I haven’t found it yet! I’ve looked everywhere for the perfect gift and I am coming up empty!” You slump back in your seat, accepting the second drink with a wry smile. “I’m gonna break my streak.”
“I may be able to help you with that,” Javi says with a sly little smile, looking at you over the top of his cup. 
“Something out of your collection? I’m sure you’ve got some fun things in there you’re not showing me,” you say, altitude and alcohol making that come out flirtier than you expected. 
“Even better. I know Nic,” he says, beginning a standoff between your incredulous face and his smug one.
“You’re joking.”
“I wrote a screenplay, he was the lead. We’re good friends.”
You have to bury your mouth in your elbow to keep from screeching like a pterodactyl.
“You’re fucking with me, really?”
“He came and stayed at my home. He’s an incredible man - talented, kind, humble, funny. I could call him up the second we land and have him record something for your sister. It would be the ultimate gift.” 
You have to admit, that would be incredible. A personalized message from Nic Cage himself? Your sister would shit a brick. You would win Christmas for sure. 
“And what would you want in return for being my Christmas miracle?” you ask, but Javi only shakes his head good-naturedly.
“Only the pleasure of your company,” he says breezily. You scoff at that.
“I don’t think my company is quite worth that.”
“I do.”
The air thickens around you, not daring to look up and see what expression Javi is wearing. Instead you let your finger run the circuit of your cup rim, hot flashes bursting along your collar. Your heartbeat thuds with twin thoughts - yes yes yes and not worthy. 
Some air would probably do you good. You excuse yourself to the restroom and lock the door firmly behind you. 
The tiny plastic sink is grounding under your hands, the hum of alcohol in your blood receding. A glance at yourself in the mirror makes you grimace - disheveled, tired eyes, rumpled loungewear that suits plane travel but not handsome strangers chatting you up. You splash a little water on your face, fortifying yourself for the return to your seat. Anyways, Javi’s out of your league, fun only because you’re trapped in a plane together. He clearly has money or comes from money, and once outside this pressurized tube you’d never be able to hold a candle to the life he has. 
So stop fucking fantasizing about what you would do if he opened that door right now and joined you in this tiny bathroom. If he’d be soft and sweet, plying you with passionate kisses as he lifted you to balance on the edge of the sink. Or maybe those flashes of focus you kept glimpsing were signs of a man who would fuck you hard and fast, time a factor but attentive to your pleasure. Would he urge you to bite down on his shoulder to muffle your cries before he spills his seed on your inner thighs?
Are you fucking rhyming now?
Sighing, you open the door and run almost directly into the man himself, a sheepish smile on his face. Your face is on fire, nodding and smiling as you pass in the tiny space outside the bathroom. Returning to your seat you try to center yourself, but a tap on your arm directs you to your forgotten aisle neighbor. She smiles conspiratorially.
“He’s single,” she says simply, eyes sparkling, and you share a secret giggle at her wingmanning your chance encounter. “And he’s clearly interested, trust me. If you don’t get his number you’ll be kicking yourself later,” she adds before going back to her show. Javi returns soon after, a few wet trails in his hair and a fresh face.
“It is not so bad in coach,” he muses, pulling out his iPad and opening up his library. 
“Even without the champagne?” you toss back, getting your own entertainment set up. The distance beginning to grow between you dampens your mood, fingers uncertain as they fiddle with the tech. 
“Even without the champagne,” Javi sighs back with a wink. He scrolls through and settles on something before looking up at you, lips parted around a question. You wait with baited breath.
“Do you…want to watch a movie with me?” he asks tentatively. “I was going to watch a favorite of mine, if you want me to AirDrop it to you?”
Heart fluttering but trying to keep your cool, you nod. “What movie?”
“Paddington 2.”
After all the Nic Cage talk, this takes you by surprise.
“I’ve never seen it.”
Javi’s face breaks out in joy.
“Then we have to watch it.”
How could you say no to that smile?
Syncing pressing play, you both settle in to watch the children’s movie. It’s honestly really good, Javi occasionally leaning over to whisper commentary in your ear. The tickle of his breath against the baby hairs along your nape is a delicious shudder you savor. 
After Paddington 2, it’s airline lunch, which Javi pokes at with an mistrusting face. You share some snacks between you as he queues up National Treasure, “the perfect movie for flying,” which leads you to debate whether that title should belong to Con Air.
It’s halfway through the movie (which still stands up after all these years) when your eyelids begin to pull, settling deeper into your uncomfortable seat. Javi peeks through his lashes, sliding a little closer.
“If you would like to close your eyes, you can lean on me,” he says with gentle hesitancy. 
“Don’t want to be a bother,” you protest, a yawn interrupting further thoughts. Javi gives you that soft smile you don’t feel worthy of receiving.
“What is a little touch between friends?” he says, an echo of his previous sentiment.
Everything, you think to yourself before resting your head against his warm shoulder. 
You dream of Javi between your legs in the plane bathroom, holding you tight to his chest as he fills you with his cock. He is whispering movie trivia to you, punctuating his thrusts with facts your mind can’t grip. Legs spread wide, head bumping against the mirror behind you, he pushes you higher and higher, hips snapping into your core. The door opens - Nic Cage pokes his head in, asking Javi about changes to a script. Javi pulls back to talk to him as he keeps fucking you senseless, swapping ideas as your orgasm hovers on the precipice. He turns back to your pleading face before absentmindedly licking his thumb and pressing it on your clit.
“Want to watch her cum, Nic?” he asks, your eyes rolling back in your head. 
A jolt of turbulence shocks you awake, your body in unbalanced arousal from that confusing dream. A wide palm strokes along your forearm, Javi’s rumbling hum right next to your ear.
“It is okay, conejita,” he murmurs, your mind blearily taking in how far you’ve leaned on him, his hand on your arm, his mouth moving against the crown of your head. “Only a few bumps, you can sleep.”
“What’s conny…” you mumble, but close your eyes at his urging. He breathes a puff of air into your scalp.
“You twitch your nose when you’re sleeping, like a bunny,” he says, hand slowing to only his thumb caressing your skin. Humming in response, you slip back under, thankfully into a dreamless sleep. 
You’re not sure how long it’s been when you finally rise, neck stiff and fingers tingling. Javi’s watching something in black and white, a man and a woman having an animated conversation. Straightening up, you wipe the corner of your mouth and pray you didn’t drool. 
“Good morning, sleepyhead,” Javi teases, “they said we should be landing in an hour.” The rapidly approaching deadline makes you wish you hadn’t passed out, even if it was the most comfortable you’ve ever been on a plane. You want to ask Javi more about himself, the life he leads, the movies he loves. But the flight attendants are making the rounds, stilling your tongue. This is only a chance meeting, nothing more. 
The landing is smooth and uneventful, both of you watching the Boston skyline come into view. You ask Javi if he’s ever been before and when he responds in the negative you point out popular landmarks, the Leonard Zakim Bridge the easiest to spot.
De-boarding is always a mess, but with the extra legroom it’s easy to get your carry-on out quickly. Javi helps you get it down, pulling his own out as well. You stand and stretch your legs, admiring how Javi's shirt pulls across his back while he packs his belongings. 
With nods and smiles and “thank yous” said on the way out, you’re free from the tight confines and in the open air of Logan. It’s nothing fancy, but it feels like homecoming whenever you enter the familiar airport. 
“Walk you to baggage claim?” you ask, Javi’s expression blooming from uncertainty to agreement. You savor the last dregs of conversation, Javi telling you he’s visiting family friends on the Cape for a few weeks. The time to part is nearing, but you don’t know what you want to ask. For his email? His number? Could you really ask for anything?
Bags in hand and a man in a suit with a printed “Gutierrez” sign looking pointedly at Javi, you finally square up to your unlikely friend.
“Thanks for a fun flight, I can’t say I’ve had a better one,” you start, Javi waving his hands in protest.
“A pleasure for me as well.” The awkwardness mounts as Javi’s driver fidgets impatiently. Girding yourself, you speak.
“I should probably…”
“I need your number.”
Javi’s blurted out request stops your goodbye, eyes widening. His do too as he stumbles to explain, fishing his phone out of his pocket.
“For the video! From Nic. For your sister. I promised, didn’t I? And you were very good company, I must keep up my side of the deal,” he rushes out, flushing high in his cheeks. You couldn’t stop beaming if you tried.
“Yeah, you’re right, you’re gonna help me win Christmas for sure,” you say, typing your number into his phone. Relief dances in his eyes as you hand the phone back, sending a quick “It’s Javi” text to you. “You only have three days to get it, though, you’re on the clock.” 
“Nic will come through, I know it,” he says, hands wrapping around your upper arms. He hesitates, then pulls you into a hug that blocks out the sweat and grime and frustration of the world around you. Orange peel and warmth fill your nostrils, and you hug him back, face tucking under the light scruff of his jaw. He holds you for longer than you expect but just long enough to know you’ll miss being hugged like this.
“Take care, conejita,” he says, watching you over his shoulder as he leaves. You wait for him to be out of sight before heading on your way.
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Christmas morning, after all the presents are opened, coffee is drunk and cheer is spread, you pair your phone to your parent’s TV and play a video message.
“Hi Clara, this is Nic Cage. My friend Javi told me you were one of my biggest fans. Now I don’t know if you can compete with him, but if he says so I have to think it’s at least a little bit true. So to my biggest fan, Merry Christmas, happy holidays, happy new year, and if you’re ever nearby I owe you a photo, a handshake, and some thanks for all your support. Take care.”
Your sister is in stitches, laughing on the floor and interrogating you about how you pulled it off. For now, your lips are sealed. 
The other video message, sent right after, you keep as your own Christmas present. 
“I told you he would come through, conejita! Merry Christmas, I hope you are spending it with the ones you love. Maybe we will be on the same flight back to LA and I will get to see you again? Or...ah, I have no plans for New Years…and you know, it’s bad luck to start the new year without a kiss. If you…would like to be mine, this year, maybe I can take you out. Yes. I would like to take you out. Please. If you want. Okay, let me…let me know. Okay, bye.”
You would very much like that.
END
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Part 2: A Bearable Weight
1K notes · View notes
lowkeyrobin · 1 month
Note
can you do a gally x reader where its like a lovers to enemies to lovers??? thanksss 🫶
thank you for requesting!! I hope you enjoyed bc this genuinley rotted my brain bc I spent way too much time overthinking it 💀💀 ; HOLY SHIT POST WRITING ROBIN HERE.... uh I didn't see the first lovers bit I am so sorry 💀 I actually apologize bc idk how to fix it now LMFAO ; also ending is rlly dumb but jsjskdndns ; send tmr requests please 🙏🙏🙏
GALLY ; i don't want to be your enemy anymore
summary ; a little enemies to lovers trope with Gally because why not
warnings ; language, guns, knives, WCKD stuff
genre ; yeah idk on this one lmk
word count ; 1.6k
masterlist
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Being stuck in that peaceful, dystopian Hell with Gally for three years was enough to make you rethink every single life choice that could've probably led you there, which wasn't much considering most of your memory had been erased. But, after escaping the maze, WCKD, fighting against Mother Nature in the Scorch and the Cranks, making it to the Right Arm, raiding a WCKD train, and a no-plan-plan to storm the Last City, you never thought you'd see Gally again, for better or for worse.
You two had never gotten along whatsoever, prior to, or post Thomas entering the Glade.
Gally would always do anything and everything just to piss you off. From the frequent physical fights to dehumanizing and undermining you for whatever reason, it never stopped. You were truly enemies, always out to get each other back or glare at each other from across the entire Glade.
He thought it was dumb for you to be awarded the graciousness of being a Runner, for whatever reason. Builders didn't have a lot going up in the membrane and he just proved it, constantly. But, sometimes you'd do the same, you weren't any better than him, just short-tempered, you supposed.
All those wasted nights sleeping in the Slammer over fighting, all the alcohol wasted due to throwing it all over each other. You both had a fire burning in your hearts to just kill each other, but in a way, it was fun. It was fun to piss each other off and get a reaction, and to just yell and scream your emotions out at each other. Toxic enemies, perhaps.
Minho though, good Lord. He always had to tease you, his fellow peer, about it.
"Oh, you're so in love with Gally" and "You look at each other with hearts in your eyes." You couldn't go a day without him bringing it up at least twice.
But now, you were trying to get Minho back from WCKD, and that's all that mattered. What did matter was that Gally was fucking alive.
Of fucking course, just your luck.
How he wasn't dead was beyond you, considering you watched Minho impale him with a spear.
You thought for a moment he was working for WCKD, considering he killed a small child last time you saw him, and he and his buddies basically kidnapped you and your friends. But, he took you guys back to some Rebellion setup hideout just outside the city, considering you couldn't get into the walls, now knowing there were microchips in your necks tracking your every move.
You stuck back while Thomas spoke to Lawrence, the guy in charge, turned half-Crank. You didn't want to be anywhere near Gally while he took Thomas down, so you stuck with the others, silently looking for reassurance in each other.
༘⋆₊ ⊹★🔭๋࣭ ⭑⋆。˚༘⋆₊ ⊹★🔭๋࣭ ⭑⋆。˚༘⋆₊ ⊹★🔭๋࣭ ⭑⋆。˚
The sun sets rather quickly, and you, Newt, and Thomas join Gally into sneaking into the city through a train tunnel. That in itself was its own thing. You don't even know why you agreed to come with them, considering you were being led by Gally, but, alright then.
He takes you three on a little tour of the city, showing you all the bright lights and the building that towered over the rest, WCKD's headquarters.
You're perched on a balcony, looking over at the building from afar. A telescope rests on the ledge of the wall, Thomas looking through it. Gally stands on his left, and then Newt and you on the right.
Newt looks over at you, sensing your discomfort from a mile away. "You okay?"
You nod, arms crossed as you look out into the city.
Thomas looks up and over at you two, telling you to look through the telescope to look into the windows of the building. Apparently, he'd seen something of interest. The blonde steps forward, looking through the lens as Thomas stands next to him.
Gally looks to you, a weird kind of look in his eyes. You shrug, silently asking what he wanted. He mouths a little message that he'll talk later, probably wanting to get back before doing so.
After returning, you find your way onto the rooftop, needing some alone time. You'd forgotten about Gally looking at you entirely, needing to clear your head over seeing him again and being shot at as per usual earlier. The fact WCKD was able to track you was what had you slightly scared. I mean, what if they were able to see you right now, trying to take a breath all alone on the rooftop?
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You don't hear Gally sneaking up on you, but when the footsteps become closer and closer, you quickly turn your head back to see him a few feet away. He apologizes for running up on you, seeing the way you quickly turned around in defense mode like you were scared or something.
"I just came out here to talk, about earlier" He explains, sitting down next to you, although making sure to leave some room between the two of you.
"What's to talk about?" You ask, looking up over the walls of the city in front of you.
"I dunno, to apologize, and try to make amends, I guess" He answers with a little snark, "I'm not asking for forgiveness, but if we're gonna work together, I'm not acting like your enemy anymore, okay?"
You take a second to actually look at him, noticing his freshly buzzed hair and his desperately needed growth spurt, mentally and physically. You slowly nod and turn away, looking back up at the walls ahead.
He exhales through his nose, a little frustrated. He wanted an actual truce, knowing you. "Y/n, I'm serious. I'm not bullshitting, I don't wanna be that stupid kid a year ago that had fun fighting and making fun of you, I want to work on the same team. I don't wanna be best friends, but I don't wanna be your enemy either"
You bite the inside of your cheek, trying to conjure up a response.
"Yeah, fine"
"...Cool"
"Initiate phase four"
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You and Gally await as Newt rounds up all the kids, keeping a close eye on Thomas forcing Teresa to give them intel and directions. Thankfully, she was halfway on your side.
Newt and Thomas send you two off with the children, all under the age of thirteen or so, directing them down to the bottom level of the parking garage where Brenda awaits. You're dressed in the slightly uncomfortable WCKD guard suits, you in the red variation like Newt, Gally in the grey like Thomas.
Once they were safe on the bus with Brenda, the two of you quickly scurried away to get lost in the crowds and hopefully meet back up with Newt and Thomas soon. You make sure your gun has the safety on while in your belt, deciding to work with handguns tonight, while he decides to go for the more bulky, electrical type of gun this night.
Somehow, Gally with a gun was kind of hot, but you'd never admit it aloud.
You power walk down the streets, making and pushing your ways through the crowds, fake patrolling the bottom layer of the WCKD tower, awaiting a message from Thomas. He tries to strike up some small talk as you also await Lawrence to bring the corporation down, since the Rebellion would never be stopped by just a few seventeen and eighteen year olds plus their forty year old father figure friend. Another plus, to properly destroy WCKD wasn't a bad idea, so the idea commenced with a very certain plan.
"Y'know, I didn't expect to see you again, like, if I ever saw you guys again. Not in a rude "I thought you would've died" way, but I didn't take you as one to try and take down the government and shit. You're a tough shank though, I'll give you that, " He speaks, speaking calmly, trying to give you that reassurance once more that he genuinely wasn't trying to start anything.
You nod, "Never thought I'd see you again either, but it's kind of relieving, to be honest. You changed in a good way. A really good way." You lightly smile, giving him a little shoulder nudge. "And don't worry about the past, it doesn't matter anymore, I couldn't care. Just... got a little scary seeing you again I guess" You shrug.
He nods. "Yeah, it's fine. Uhm... fuck, sorry" He says, trying to find the right words, "I'm not saying this like, to try and weird you out or distract you but I feel like to not hate each other anymore, we need to be open-"
"I like you too, if that's what you're getting at." You shrug, stopping in your tracks as he does. "If not, then sorry, kinda jumped to conclusions." You awkwardly chuckle, double checking your safety again.
He nods, "Cool. We'll talk about this later then?"
"Why not now? Under the soon to be burning building?" You joke with a light laugh.
"I missed that laugh" He mumbles
"Hey, hey, calm down now" You chuckle, shoving his shoulder, "We have a mission, here. We're children at war, Gally"
"The mission can wait a moment" He suggests, giving you a look, awaiting approval.
You dramatically roll your eyes with a smile, accepting his move before quickly pulling him in for a little kiss. You dragged him by the strap of his WCKD vest, almost making him fall on his knees for you.
"Now come on, we gotta go find some people to get in formation with and get to Newt and Thomas" You nod sideways, pulling your mask back up.
"Yeah, yeah, let's go"
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Text
Tumblr Fandom: A Year in Review 2023
Tagged by @mistmarauder and I'm pretty sure I'm contractually obligated to do as she says so...
Top Five Blorbos: Eddie Diaz, Evan "Buck" Buckley, Patrick Jane, Edgin Darvis, Xenk Yendar
Top Five Fandoms: 9-1-1, Fast & Furious, Dungeons and Dragons: Honor Among Thieves, The Mentalist, The Witcher
Top Five OTPs: Buddie, Xedgin, whatever the hell Dom/Brian is called (there is so little fanfic for them I am weeping), Jisbon, House/Shenanigans uh I mean House/Wilson/Cuddy
Shoutout to Some New Friends: @princessfbi and @tulipfromtheinternet have been very kind to me, leaving treats out on their porches for me to sniff. I even let them pet me after a few months of slowly earning my trust!
Shoutout to Some Old Friends: @mistmarauder and @catdadeddie are two friends I grew closer with this year, and have done a lot to restore my trust in people. They've put up with an unfair amount of prickliness and distrust on my part with grace and love. @evcndiaz has also put up with me dropping into her inbox with fun (horrifying) facts about human anatomy, which earns her a gold medal. And of course @givemeunicorns @devilsbrokerank @captainofthefallen and @extasiswings continue to be my rocks and remind me that there are good people in this world, and that some of those good people might actually love me.
Favorite Creation You Posted This Year: Genuinely I feel like with my Halloween fics I have done the best work in my fanfiction career. I'm shocked at how proud I am of the fanfics I put out this year, including my Wednesday fic and my Xedgin fics. It's impossible for me to choose a favorite.
Favorite Creation Posted by Someone Else This Year: @kittykatthetacodemon had me reading fic for fandoms and ships I'm not even in or shipping? she's just that fucking good? holy shit go watch Mag7 and then read her fics just. just do it.
People Who Brightened Your Year: @lisbonsteresa always and forever brightens my days, and it was a delight this year to be in the same fandom again as she got me hooked on The Mentalist, @mistmarauder always makes me laugh even (especially) when she's roasting me, and @extasiswings helped me get away from the real world a couple times when I needed it.
Anyone Else You'd Like to Mention: I'm so grateful to all of my readers, always. Your enthusiasm and comments are what keep me going. Thank you thank you thank you.
Five of Your Favorite Authors This Year: I'll be honest I have barely read any fanfic this year since I simply haven't had time but a quick shout out again to @kittykatthetacodemon because Mist forced me to read her fanfics at gunpoint and I've never been so happy to be at gunpoint after reading them. I've reread her Hobbs & Shaw fics literally a dozen times, she nails the hysterical over-the-top banter from the F&F films and it has me giggling every time.
Oh and @henswilsons. Forever and always making me laugh with your delightful fics. Never stop, dear.
Five of Your Favorite Artists/Gifmakers/Podficcers/Etc. This Year: @captain-hen so many times I see a gifset that makes me insane and it's by you, you menace. @like-the-rest-of-la lovely art from a lovely person. @bucksketch you make art that has me screeching and twirling my hair and kicking my feet. @mistmarauder your podfics, babe, you know how much I adore them. Um I'm terrible at remembering urls (I'm even worse with names). Uh. Um. Uhhhh. Uhhhhhhh... *we're all still waiting days later*
Three Things You're Looking Forward to in 2024: 9-1-1 SEASON SEVEN BABEEEEEEY
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the-kinnie-in-me · 1 year
Note
Okay, well then I hope you don’t mind me returning with yet another request. I can’t help it, I just really love your writing <3
I would love some headcanons for tasm Peter falling in love again for the first time since Gwen (god, just typing that made me tear up lmao)!
Take your time, have fun with it, and have a lovely day/night :)
A/n: This has been in my ask box for so long holy shit- I'm so sorry about that. I was on an intense writer's block and I think the fact that its Valentines' Day where I'm at kinda inspired me. This is not my best work since romantic writing isn't my cup of tea 😭 But I still hope you enjoy this-
𝐓𝐀𝐒𝐌! 𝐏𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐟𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐧 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐚𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐆𝐰𝐞𝐧:
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⚠︎⚠︎⚠︎⚠︎⚠︎⚠︎⚠︎⚠︎⚠︎⚠︎⚠︎⚠︎⚠︎⚠︎⚠︎⚠︎⚠︎⚠︎⚠︎⚠︎
(I’m basing this off before he met the other Peters btw)
Let's start with some pre-relationship stuff-
I don’t really see it as love at 1st sight
It might take some since yk- his ex died because he couldn’t save her
How much time it would take would depend on how persistent you are in befriending him 1st
 There's definitely some remaining guilt and self-loathing so please be patient with him
He’s still a nice and friendly person so it isn’t that hard to befriend him 
In other words- You’re gonna have to buckle up since you’re about to experience the slowest slow-burn friends-to-lovers in history (Tho the fluff post and pre-relationship make it worth it)
Now onto the relationship itself
Aunt May adores you
She saw how you make her nephew happy after what happened with Gwen and approved of you immediately
“I saw how that boy mourned Gwen. I raised him for most of his life and it was devastating for me to see him like that. Then he met you, it was like it never happened and he was as happy as he was before. And I can’t express how thankful I am to you.”
We all saw how much effort he put into his and Gwen’s relationship- He would do the 1000% same thing with you
This is a bit angsty but- It just doesn’t feel the same?? THO IT DOESN’T HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH HOW MUCH HE LOVES YOU- When he was doing that stuff for Gwen he had a lot more self-esteem if you get what I mean?
HELP HIM GAIN HIS CONFIDENCE BACK
There have to be a lot of words of affirmation in this relationship homeboy needs it
After he gains his confidence it's mostly rainbows and sunshine
The reason why I say mostly? The topic of Spiderman.
I mean- He would tell you but he doesn’t want you to get involved 
He is very much persistent about that
He will give you every reason to not  get involved 
There’s honestly no win in this situation
If you don’t get involved you worry about him daily
*Peter enters your bedroom through your window*
“The hell happened this time?”
“They um- got me pretty bad”
You rush to grab the First Aid kit
“Yeah. I can see that.”
“Are you mad at me?”
“I’m not mad.”
“Are you sure…Because your tone kinda says otherwise”
*Sighs* “I’m not mad. Just stressed and worried because of you.”
If you do get involved he worries about you daily
“WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!”
“SAVING YOUR ASS”
Or
“What are you doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be out doing Spiderman things?”
“Yeah about that- Whatever I was fighting got away and it seemed pretty pissed. I just wanted to make sure it wasn’t gonna be petty and go after you”
I just realized the majority of this has been angst or about Gwen’s death in some way-
He doesn’t confront people when jealous
Poor boy just wants to leave with you beside him
He tries to hide it but it's kinda obvious
Tease him about it and see how long it takes for him to admit it I wanna test a theory
He is a total softy for you
Why can’t I find a bf like that on E-bay
A sane amount of PDA
Like hand-holding, falling asleep on him (albeit accidentally), and kissing on the cheek
He likes cuddling in private tho
Everything he does for and says to you just seems to be genuine-
A gentleman that was raised well fr
He will do so many things for you that it's concerning how fast he agrees,
“Hey Pete can you-”
“Of course”
This is entirely my opinion/ idea of him- I don’t see him calling you any pet names besides the occasional “babe” 
BUT- the amount of love and emotion traced whenever he just simply says your name makes up for it completely
Before I end this I just want to make 1 thing clear-
You are NOT a rebound 
He will do anything to prove that he never considered you a replacement for Gwen the moment he senses you feel that way
In his eyes, Gwen is his past 
In his eyes, you are his present and future
In his eyes, you are his everything.
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kimtaegis · 7 months
Note
I'm going to try to explain this as coherently as I can. I want Jungkook to do his thing, but at the same time, it is bothering me so much that his thing seems to be basic, crass songs about sex. Like, brother in Christ, there is a nuanced, fun, genuinely sexy way to do explicit songs that doesn't read thoughtless, fuckboi nonsense. Hello, "My Time," get off the floor, my love?! I hated Seven, but 3D is making me feel like I was harsh on her. At least Latto has flow and brings energy. WHY, for the love of all things holy, did anyone green light Jack Harlow rapping about AGB????!!!! I was LIVID because have we not had enough of white men fetishizing Asian women. And there weren't even any Asian women in the MV!!! And then the optics of the women being lined up beside him one by one. WHO OKAYED THIS???? The members as a group and in their solo work have dabbled with explicit lyrics, sex, etc. But it has never felt like this "fuck it to hell, I wanna be famous and I'll do it in the easiest way possible, lemme talk about champagne confetti." Are you serious??? This man gave us "Still With You." And I do hold Jungkook responsible for a fair amount of it. He's 26 and obviously gets final say on the final product. I get that he wants to be seen as a grown up, but all I'm seeing is the equivalent of the Nickelodeon/ Disney kids going ham to break the image. This ain't it, okay? And if the rumours I'm hearing about his EP are true, it's going to be a hard pass for me. I have never recoiled from a song that came from BTS or a member the way I have with Jungkook's singles so far. I'm aghast at his potential (which he has showcased so much in past) being squandered on this run-of-mill, brainless, nonsense. Sure, he'll get the numbers, it's going straight to radio and this fandom is bleeting in unison like sheep possessed. But he's lost a lot of my respect for him.
you expressed yourself well and I can sympathise with your negative feelings and where they’re coming from… I honestly am just as shocked about harlow’s rap being greenlit both from the team behind but also from jungkook himself. it makes me wonder once again how much he was actually involved in everything simply because I hate the thought of him being aware of the lyrics and letting them through on the nod… you can very much make a light, fun, sexy song without putting problematic phrases and innuendos in it. again, it all comes back to nuance in pretty much all aspects of this whole song discussion. wanting to be seen as mature/ as a grown-up also means taking responsibility for everything that’s put out in your name (with your consent ofc). we could probably talk about this for hours on end though and unfortunately it doesn’t change much cause as you said at the end, there’re enough people who simply do not care about all of this, blindly support their fave artist and want to vibe. I saw that 3D (edit: the version with JH) is currently number three on spotify global right after Seven, so yeah. numbers equal success, success means the support and demand is there, and so the chances are high that he will keep going in this direction, I’m afraid. but let’s wait for his album, he’s been full of surprises, maybe he’ll surprise once more, and this time in a more positive way, again
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asmolvaporeon · 2 months
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Hi @threefeline! I draw maybe once a year and when I do it’s usually symmetrical patterns and not things with an actual anatomy, but goddamn you inspired me to draw something more tangible because your demon looks cool and you’re a cool person and I wanted to draw something for you to express that. I hope you understand when I say that from the moment I saw that sketch I thought “oh god he looks RAD I want to draw him!” and holy shit(!) I did. A full-ass, made-from-scratch digital drawing!
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So yeah the perspective is a bit wonky and not what I aimed for and I have no idea what shading is but I am happy that I made this and I hope you’re happy too. This was drawn with a laptop touchpad, lots of patience and no experience so I’m giving myself some slack. It was nonetheless fun! I might do this some more! I feel that I learned some things, at least about the art program, so that’s something.
Also I’m never drawing chains again. Hell. Absolute capital-letter-H Hell is what that part was every step of the way. 
I’ll put a read more here because I made thought-notes during the process. Some of them are fun. There's also the base sketch that I did on paper.
(To the tune of the hills are alive with the sound of music) Where doooeess the other back leeggg goooooo?
Solution: he splooting!
Clavicle? Never heard of her!
(Threefeline I don’t know how you do this you’re a fucking wizard!)
Okay what is this arm going to do? Fuck it let it hold some flowers, that’s what they are good for.
Oh no his head is too large, we don’t want an egghead; make him a pinhead!
FUCK THERE ARE HORNS AS WELL
Good Loooord hands are haaaard
I implore you Threefeline, ignore his messed up left hand.
Oh okay, alright then. Fuck, god, chains are possibly worse, just for different reasons. 
Oh no I think I gave him the handsome Squidward face
Why can’t I get the horn angles RIGHT
Why is the noodle harder to draw?!
Oh god I broke its arm
Fuck it, mewtwo tail! 
We’re snatching his waist, lads!…What have we done
Hand? What hand? There’s only fluff there!
I tried making the colors more dull, but well…I just couldn’t really get the hang of it? Hopefully I’ll learn some day?
What the fuck is shading. Shading chains in particular is bullshit.
(After figuring out gold) Oh my god I feel like Michelangelo here. I’m learning art man. 
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phantomram-b00 · 6 months
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So I saw this post and I just wanna talk about it, specifically the last two,
The fact people think Crowley hates Aziraphale over the finale is kinda baffling and unserious to me. Like I’m not saying Crowley isn’t going to be mad at him, but hate is very much a strong word considering everything they’ve been through together. Because if that was the cast, shit Crowley could’ve hated him a long as time ago, even from a beginning since they’re suppose to be enemies, they drill it in Aziraphale and I don’t doubt hell drill it in Crowley’s head too about this but he doesn’t (and I highly doubt Aziraphale hated Crowley) or even during the holy water situation or any moment when they had a spat or disagreement. Did this finale gave him a wound, yes, (like I may be a Aziraphale kin but that shit hurt my feelings) am I saying Crowley is incapable of hate? No I’m sure he hates a lot of things (*cough cough*, metatron rn) but I don’t see him bringing himself to hate Aziraphale over this nor do I think he’ll try to, it be out of character for him to even try to. This is the same character that brought down London are mobile phone network and called that his sinful deed, so are we really expecting more out of that?
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And no, Crowley not gonna become Duke of Hell to spite him, that’s also an out of character thing, just because he said no and Aziraphale said yes with his promotion, doesn’t mean he going to just waltz back to hell and tell Shax “hey I wanna be Duke of Hell role since my non-official spouse left me for his job”, he not petty like Aziraphale; he going to stay in earth since that’s his home. That’s his space, why else do you think we hardly see scene of him in hell, because he never considered hell home/his side (and let not kid ourself, who would if you have people like Furfur who most likely lick the walls and how claustrophobic that place is, so I feel Crowley). I’m not trying to bring back the job episode since everyone talk about it, (I love the episode as much as the next person) I do think that is a prime example of him saying he doesn’t even on hell’s side. So imma just bring up the other minisode where after the magic show, they celebrate it and also comment on how they both are in shades of grey in some way, Crowley being the darker grey whilst Aziraphale being the lighter shade (which I’m surprised no one talked about, someone probably did an I missed it but I’m just surprised no one is talking about that conversation but I digress.) so the whole “Duke of hell Crowley” is nonsense, could be a fun au for fanfic but on paper it doesn’t fit really.
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Okay now to the whole “they’re going to be turn into mortals”, I was gonna make a post about this but I didn’t want to come off as someone who disagree with all the theories, but this one, I really can’t stand, (if you believe it, cool that’s valid.) and imma just talk about it. While sure, it can be they have no side anymore, but why would you want them to be separated again, especially since we don’t know where they’ll even go if they do die. But also, just because they love humanity doesn’t mean they want to be mortal, like I get the romantic implication of this theory/prediction, but I honestly don’t think turning them human is romantic nor is it a good thing, it feels more like a punishment all over again because they love each other. Look even if they do the whole reincarnation thing which fine, book of life did this. Well done, good writing all around, but it still another form of punishment because they going to be separated all the damn time. Like especially since they didn’t turn ineffable bureaucracy into humans (not to being the ship into it since I do love this ship.) so why would they make ineffable spouse/husband/wives into humans? Why should they be punish for simply loving each other? Why can’t they enjoy eternity loving each other as demon and angel, or just immortal beings since at the end of the day, they wouldn’t want a side, they are their own side.
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Now look, I’m all for angst, I feel season 3 might have some with how season 2 ended, but sometimes, some angst idea like the one I just talk about or what the op posted just doesn’t make sense/out of character. And I just had to talk about it even thought I really am not suppose to be up. (I only am because I toke what felt like a century nap Crowley gets.) I know season 2 left us with mixed emotions, like I haven’t felt that way since Arcane. And you know, if you do believe in the Theory mention in the post or what I said, cool, that’s valid, don’t let me tell you otherwise. Just I don’t find myself agreeing with these, if you do tell me why, anyway, I just needed to say this, here another Crowley gif since I love this character and I do find myself in him. (Maybe not as much as I find myself in Aziraphale but close enough, I kin them both)
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chershare · 11 months
Text
AI BS because WTF guys
So like, I know I have a lot of WIP out there. A lot of fic I haven’t updated in a long time but have no plans of abandoning because I love all of my writing and I do have plans for all of my works. It’s just finding motivation that’s the issue, not the intent to finish them.
If I’d planned to never work on something again, I’d do what most people do these days and label it as Abandoned. Hell, if I hated it and decided to axe it completely, I’d just remove it.
There are plenty of fic I follow that haven’t been update in a long time - some over a decade, and that’s fine - and I love to reread and daydream about potential endings. A fun way to pass the time, because I can come up with the endings or continuations in my own way even if they never get finished.
I don’t, however, contemplate stealing them.
There are authors that I follow that have abandoned some of my fav of their works or left fandoms entirely, and that’s fine. I have never once thought while rereading a fic I know will never be continued “hey, what if I steal this and feed it into a capitalist machine for my own amusement?” because that’s not what decent people do. We don’t steal from people, even if they aren’t doing things in the fandoms or fic that we love, because why the fuck would we.
Who the fuck does that? No writer would thank you for it, and there is no doubt that you would know it’s wrong to take someone’s work like that.
Fandom isn’t perfect, but I want to think that the vast majority aren’t the kind of people who are so selfish and uncaring as this.
I haven’t removed Tsundoku from ffnet despite the many issues I have with the site, even though I haven’t updated it in an age, because someone who uses a text to voice app that works with ffnet better than Ao3 asked me not to. I could have done so despite the toxicity that I’ve known with the fandom on that site, but for someone else’s comfort I’ve left it up.
I haven’t stopped writing despite some truly unpleasant people trying to start shit in comments for their own petty, small minded amusement, even on Ao3. Where it is infinitely better than on ffnet, in my personal experience. I haven’t stopped updating and haven’t removed my works from the web even though trolls and shit stirrers exist.
But if I find out that someone has stolen my fics - no matter how long it’s been since I updated them - and fed them to a fucking AI of any kind, I will remove all my works and never post a goddamn thing again. I changed my settings on Ao3 to users only to potentially avoid the chance of being mined by some AI bullshit, and if I’m betrayed by even the fellow users of Ao3, I’ll just quit. I won’t like it, but I’ll fucking do it.
What else can I do? At that point? Where even real, live people in fandom just... steal from me to go expressly against my wishes? Who don’t respect my time, effort and creativity?
What would be the point of writing if someone doesn’t appreciate the time, effort and goddamn passion I’ve put into my works? Because feeding fic into an AI to get “an ending” - so fucking insulting - says that you don’t respect the authors writing and you don’t respect them as people. I’m sure there are some people - I can’t picture it, but I’m sure they might exist in some fictional universe - who don’t care.
I care. I really fucking care.
This isn’t about plagiarism or anything. I don’t make money from writing fanfic, I just have fun and like to play in sandboxes and share those ideas with my readers, hoping in good faith that they also enjoy and respect my efforts. There are plenty of fics and art that I’ve seen that are similar to my own works, and that’s fucking awesome. I’ve got some other authors who link me as inspired by, and so far I haven’t had any issues with people wholesale stealing my fics.
Who cares about a few similar lines or paragraphs in the grand scheme of things, because holy shit two cakes yaaaassss am I right? That’s just the way of things. If it’s like a whole chapter or more, then it’s like “hey bro, uh, nani the fuck” but I haven’t had the actual plagiarism issue. I’m flattered when someone has a style or idea that is similar to my own, because that means I’m at that point in my writing where someone is learning their own writing style based on mine.
That is nice. Flattering. Makes me feel like some kind of fandom parent or whatever, patting the little fandom babies on the back as they grow into themselves. You use that culture and world building I started - do it child! Expand! I’m so proud of those little shits.
This AI shit? That is not flattering.
That just makes me feel sick. Violated.
The thought that someone would just throw out that bridge - that trust - between writer and reader, just fucking burn it down, is so, so fucking horrifying. I don’t know how to express it, but my hands literally started to shake when I first learned that someone would steal work because it wasn’t finished and feed it to an AI without so much as a by-your-leave.
I have so many WIPs guys. So many beloved fic that I wanted to share even if they weren’t near done. I’d never thought I’d be afraid of posting something unfinished, but now I’m pretty fucking terrified.
And angry. So, so angry.
There are authors who stopped writing their fic for various reasons, who have disappeared from fandom, not because they don’t have inspiration or are experiencing burnout, but because they died. That’s right, you’re potentially whining about someone not finishing their WIP because their lives ended. I can’t even express how much writers not finishing their fics more than likely doesn’t have a thing to do with you.
Unless you harassed someone off a platform, then more often than not people don’t care about you when it comes to updating. Funnily enough, more often than not, it’s not about you.
If you’re upset about someone not finishing a fic - something that’s done for free and fun, shared without expectation - I would like you to think of that potential worst case scenario and take a goddamn chill pill. Sure, that’s not the result in some cases, thank all the gods, but it could be. It could be someone that didn’t just dip out of a fandom or abandoned a fic; it could be so much worse, and you’re stealing from them. They don’t even have a chance to consent - not that I think they would - and you stealing their hard work because “wah, I want to see the end boohoo” is just the epitome of being a giant, entitled piece of shit.
Why the fuck would you disrespect someone’s work by stealing it to give it to a machine that is literally built to be a capitalistic feeder? Why do you care so little about writers that you would do something like this?
If you don’t like that something isn’t finished, you can always ask to write a continuation. You can link as “inspired by” and write your own, if you’re that desperate. You don’t want to/think you can’t write? Live with it. Professional writers drop series or go on hiatus for decades all the time. And they get paid.
We don’t have to share our work with you. Honestly, I have plenty of people outside of wider fandom that I can share my work with privately and never worry about someone stealing my shit again. The fact that I’m contemplating that eventuality of someone going against my wishes, violating my contribution to fandom and the love I have of my work is just - awful.
It feels awful. Like, I have angry tears of frustration in my eyes as I’m writing this.
Writing for people who enjoy it is a joy! Interacting with people about my fics is one of the highlights of fandom! Getting comments - even the dreaded wall of emojis or “update soon” right after an update - is enough to brighten even the worst of days!
People who decide that their personal wants with an author’s work is more important than going on that journey with them? Deciding not to respect the author? That kills the joy.
The trust.
The drive.
I have less desire to write and post since learning about this, and I’m trying to fight back against that depressive wave of “what’s the point?” but it’s so fucking hard guys. If someone is going to decide to steal my shit anyway, what’s the fucking point in trying to continue or find inspiration?
I don’t want to have to leave fandom as a creator. I don’t want to take away my fic from the people who love it, who have been following my fics for years and respect that I can’t always wrap my soggy brain meat around a fic and leave it for a while - sometimes years - to work on other things. I don’t want to.
But I will.
To protect myself, my choices, my writing? To protect myself? I’ll leave.
It won’t be the first relationship that’s soured and gotten bad that I’ve needed to drop like hot coals, but it will be the longest lasting one. It’ll hurt, and maybe I’ll have regrets, but I’ll fucking do it because I won’t be disrespected and have my writing used like this.
Outside of fandom there’s already so much shit that I cannot stomach having to deal with this kind of fuckery here as well. Fandom isn’t necessarily a “safe space” but it has always been an escape and somewhere that I can have fun. That I can at least trust people to appreciate my writing when I manage to update someone after a while, even if it’s a small thing.
I don’t know what kind of asshole you have to be to decide to steal someone’s work, someone’s joy, and do something like this - at least outright plagiarism is almost flattering. I’m not the most popular writer out there, but I’ve been in fandom for a while, and it takes all kinds. All kinds does not include the AI that we’ve been suddenly having to defend ourselves against since they became a real problem.
This is just a slap in the face.
The fact that maybe there are people out there in fandom who are acting like the AI Trojan Horse, stealing our works - our time, effort, creative process and enjoyment - and doing things like this? It’s so fucking disheartening and hurtful and just downright cruel.
So yeah. Please don’t steal my shit. Don’t steal anyone’s work and do something like this. You’re doing more damage than you seem to think. Not that I’m sure you’re thinking at all.
Maybe you - the people who do this - don’t care. Maybe that’s why you did it in the first place. Maybe writers don’t count as real people to you, not when it comes to fanfic or anything. Maybe you are just that selfish that only your own wants matter.
Maybe you don’t care about how I, we, feel.
But I do.
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yourlocalartsonist · 8 days
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ROTTMNT Moths Fly In Packs - Chapter Nine
HOLY MOTHERFUCKING SHIT I'M ALIVE AND I AM SO SORRY! It's been way too long and I'm genuinely sorry this chapter took several fucking months to make but IT'S FINALLY DONE! It ended up way longer than I intended man, I THOUGHT THIS WAS GONNA BE SHORT. It's my longest chapter yet fun fact. I don't even regret it really, it benefited so much from the extra effort. Hopefully the next few chapters won't take this long but I will refrain from jinxing myself again so🧍‍♀️Anyway enough blabbering, hope y'all enjoy this one ;w;
CREDIT To the MFIP Team: Thank you to @yosajaeofficial, @urlocalmj, misfortun3_ismyname (on TikTok), @chaoticspeedrun, @ramblehour and @goldanrabbit for being my lovely editors! MAN did they give this chapter a lot of polish-
Previous Chapter | Next Chapter | Chapter One
Disclaimer: Chapter involves verbal abuse/manipulation, harassment, gaslighting, depressive thoughts, violence, blood, mentions of a wounded limb, brief mentions of nausea, displayed anxiety, and curse words. If you're sensitive to that, scroll past and stay safe!
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I rushed around my room throwing shit on as fast as I could. Not fast enough apparently, since my phone’s vibrating like it’s gonna explode.
It’s late as hell right now, but Zane insisted on meeting up. Pretty randomly at, like, 11pm on a school night. I was initially planning to reject the idea or ghost with the excuse of sleeping, but it’s been a good while since I actually did hang out with him. I know insomnia’s gonna keep me up for a bit anyway, so why the hell not? We might even have fun! Just wish he’d stop flooding my notifs like I didn't already say I was actively getting ready.
I looked in the mirror, checking to see if I was presentable enough for the outside realm. My reflection’s the same as always; for better or worse. Still the same pink dress, same green skirt, same  boots. Can’t forget the gold earrings; the only emergency asset I held onto. I don’t know what I expected. I don’t have much to work with. Guess the gloves from Donnie are new, at least. But I’m still getting… bored? A change in appearance—even a small one—might be able to fill that hole for a while. Keep me distracted.
Maybe I could do something with my hair tonight? I still have Mi’s ribbon lying here somewhere.
I ignored Zane’s digital pestering and spent a few extra minutes shuffling through drawers and boxes, eventually finding her long, white ribbon—handmade from moth silk. She wore it all the time. I barely remember her hair being fully down unless she was sleeping or about to shower. Except for that one night, of course. The night she left and was never found again. She almost did take the ribbon with her. Had her hair done up in a bun and everything, even a little fancier than usual. But she took it off once she saw me behind her, barely reflected in the mirror. She crouched down, placed it in my tiny palms, and gave me her wonderfully warm smile. It’s the last thing she left me with. The last gift she could ever give me. 
After that, the ribbon’s survived years of storage and then more years of… unconventional bullshit use. I know moth silk ain’t the weakest thing on Earth but I’ve deadass used this ribbon as a make-shift pulley system to sneak stuff into my room through the window before, some of which weighed more than me! Its got the endurance of a Nokia at this point. 
I’ve barely used the ribbon for its intended purpose, though. I mean, how could I? I’m not my mom no matter how similar we look. Maybe this is a me-thing, but I always felt wearing the ribbon would be like replacing her with myself. 
Although, I’m sure Mi would’ve loved it if I wore it. 
Using the ribbon, I tied my hair into a ponytail and styled it as a loose bow, just to see how it would look. The white tails gently draped over my back down to my hips. I never quite realized how long the ribbon was before now. I don’t look as fancy or pretty as mom did, but it’s the best I’ve got. It… it doesn’t look bad, though, I think. It actually looks kinda nice! Maybe I’ll use it a bit more often. 
My phone’s repeated buzzing snapped me out from my trance. “Alright, alright, shut up already.” I groaned. Zane’s growing impatient.
You: hey sorry I jsut finished getting ready
You: heading out the door now! :3 
Fuck doors. Sneaking out became a whole lot easier ever since I did it from my window, but he doesn’t have to know that. I can already imagine him scolding me about the dangers of dropping down from high places, even with the fire escape there. He wouldn’t be wrong, per se, but at this point I’ve handled worse. Would probably send him into cardiac arrest if he knew what I’d actually been up to these few months.
I sprinted to the spot we agreed to meet up at. Zane was already there, leaning against the wall with his hands stuffed in his pockets like always. 
“Salena! Hey!” He lit up like a star when he saw me, beckoning me over.
God, for a sour person, he has such a sweet smile. He’s usually so good at being intimidating and frightening. Yet the second he brings out his smile, all that built-up fear washes away like it was never there to begin with. 
“I almost thought you wouldn’t come.”
“Well, I figured I could use some fresh air.” I tilted my head to the side, eyeing his fit. “You left your sweater at home?”
“Hm?” He followed my gaze to his pitch black tank top in place of the usual outfit. “Oh, right! Yeah, the weather’s too hot for a sweater tonight. Forgot I changed it, really.”
Now that I’m looking closer, his choker’s missing too. It probably didn’t match with the top. Seems like it got swapped with a black watch on his left wrist that complimented the look way more. Doesn’t matter what he pretends to be though, I know Zane pays very close attention to his appearance. He’s gotta maintain the rep of our grade’s “Pretty Boy” after all. When it comes to him, every little detail matters.
Wait a sec…
“What happened to your arm?”
I couldn’t see ‘till he turned towards me but his left arm had a deep bluish-purple bruise spread across it. It looked like it was from something long like a pipe or a bat. Either way, it was gnarly enough to worry me. 
“Oh that. It’s nothing too bad.” He shrugged.
“You kiddin’ me? It looks awful! What happened?” I carefully grabbed his arm and took a closer look at the mark. I wish Leo was here, but thankfully I’ve picked up a little medic knowledge from him so I can at least tell if a bone is broken or not.
“Hey, don’t get your feathers all fluffed! I got a little hurt rough-housing with the guys, that’s all. You know how they are.”
“Rough-housing? Or a secret murder attempt?” I was only being half sarcastic. It wouldn’t be out of character for them.
“Don’t worry! It’s really sweet of you to care, but they’d never dare hurt me on purpose! Now, on another note…“ He paused for a moment, taking a proper look at me. For a little bit, I couldn’t tell why he smirked. “Looks like someone wanted to look cute tonight, ey? You wore your hair up.”
“Huh?” I touched my hair, forgetting I changed it earlier. “Oh, um, yeah! I-I did! I thought I’d give it a try. Does it… um, you know, look too bad or weird or?…”
“No! No, it… it looks really pretty.” Oh god, that’s a relief to hear! I was so paranoid it wouldn’t suit— “I gotta ask, though.”
I caught him inching closer. I tried creating space, but quickly realized I was up against the wall again. Should’ve been more careful about that. His hand reached out, bringing back all sorts of cringe-inducing memories. He didn’t technically pin me like last time, but he tucked my bangs back behind my ear. Feeling his fingers come into contact with my skin almost feels just as nauseating, though. 
“How’d you know I had a thing for girls in ponytails?”
And fuck, he made it weird again.
“Z-Zane?”
“Yeah?…” WHY ISN’T HE GETTING THE HINT!? “You know, you always look so soft when you dress up. You just bloom.”
“…So! What are we doing tonight?” 
His smile slightly dropped, likely upset I ruined whatever moment he was trying to have. Honestly, didn’t matter to me, as shitty as that sounds. I just wanted to change the topic so he’d step back a bit. We go through this every time; this stupid ass, awkward aura. I wish it would stop happening. 
On the bright side, he did step back and redirect his focus to answering my question. On the not so bright side, his answer was a pathetic shrug.
“I don’t know.”
“Y-you… What do you mean you don’t know? I snuck out here in the middle of the night, you told me it’d be something special! You’ve gotta have something planned.”
“Honest, I don’t! I thought it was beautiful outside and it reminded me of you. Wanted to see where such a lovely night could take us. I think that’s special enough, don’t you?”
“W-Well, I mean—“
He chuckled “What’s wrong? You’re not backing out now, are you?” 
I may have praised his smile earlier, but right now it’s making my eye twitch. I’m a little peeved knowing he brought me out here for shits and giggles when I could’ve at least been resting in bed, replenishing some of my energy. I know I don’t have the best sleeping habits, but that doesn’t mean I can’t get tired from the constant action going on! I don’t even know how long he’s gonna keep me hostage for! But… he’s also right that it’d be kinda shitty to bail now. Besides, I’m already out here so…
I guess all that’s left to do is suck it up and try to make the best of it. 
“Well, do you wanna… go for a walk or something?”
“Sounds perfect to me! Come on, hold my hand, Dove.”
For someone who supposedly didn’t have a plan, he sure took an awful lot of charge during that walk. He suggested we go to Central Park and practically dragged me there despite my common sense screaming to never go to that hellspawn at night. Although, I can’t complain too much. The park’s definitely the best place to see the stars, and tonight had clear skies! He made sure to keep a tight grip on me in case we ran into any classic New York weirdos anyway, so I should probably be less tense. I guess I got used to the guaranteed safety of having literal ninjas around me, I forgot what it was like hanging out with a regular person. 
On top of that, Zane seemed really happy! Happier than I’ve seen him in a while, actually. He was giddily pointing out any interesting greenery we saw and rambling random facts he knew about them. 
Even later, when we went and dined inside a relatively fancy restaurant, all he could focus on was the different plants they chose as decor. He’s such a huge nature geek, but he’d never let anyone know. Zane’s the type of guy to get 100% on a biology test and shamefully shove it in his backpack to avoid being labeled as a nerd. Being a nerd myself, I think it’s pretty cool, so I never understood it. But either way, I’m glad he feels safe around me. I’m glad he doesn’t hide around me.
I forgot about this side of him, I really did. The side that is my friend.
We were walking back to my place, taking in the bliss of the quiet night. Even if a part of me prefers the busier, noisy parts of the city, it’s really soothing to experience the calmer sides of it too. Everything about tonight feels nearly perfect. I’m surprised nothing ruined it. I’m debating if I could ruin it…
I really want to talk to him. I wanna bring up those photos, get some answers, put my strange emotions to rest once and for all. I wanna hear it from him that neither of them meant to hurt me. That this was just my mind screwing me over again. I need to know. I really need to know. 
You know, friends are supposed to lend a shoulder when you need it.
I don’t want to ruin the night. But friendship takes risks sometimes. That’s what shows its strength, right?
I take a deep breath and go for the leap of faith.
“So, I was wondering—” “Salena, I wanted to ask—” 
I really gotta work on my timing for these things.
“S-Sorry! You go first.”
He shook his head with a delicate smile. “Nah, it’s okay. You can go.”
“Are you sure? I-I mean it’s kinda complicated…”
“Yeah, I’m sure! I always love hearing you talk, anyway.” 
“O-okay then, well…” My hands balled up into determined fists and I looked him right in the eyes. I have to put an end to this or I’ll never be able to move on. “I’ll be real, it might be a weird question.But you’re my friend and I really trust you a lot. I… I have to know this, so please don’t get mad.”
“Yeah…?” Why did he have to lean in closer…
I came this far, I’m not letting my tongue shut me up again. 
“What’s going on with you and Jaiden?”
Immediately his demeanor changed. His posture slouched, the disappointment clear as day on his face. “Jaiden? You’re—you’re really thinking about… about them, now?” 
“Yes, b-but I want to stop! That’s why I need to ask you this, so please bear with me, Zane.”
He leaned back with a hand on his hip, the other covering his face as he exhaled. “And here I was getting my hopes up for nothing.”
He would never think that I heard him; Zane’s a good whisperer. Unfortunately, my hearing rivals it.
He looked at me again; his eyes didn’t feel the same. “Okay, fine. What is it?”
I felt my stomach twist into itself. My chest began to ache. If I didn’t know any better, I’d think I was about to hurl.
It’s okay. Friends get a little upset at each other all the time. Doesn’t mean they’ll break apart. Don’t be a coward, Salena. 
I told him about everything. The canceled plans, Jaiden’s distant behavior, the increase in their pics together on his Instagram. I vented about how frustrated I felt with seeing them spend so much time together and then completely ignore me. And then vented some more about how frustrated I felt from that frustration, how I knew it was wrong yet couldn’t help it seeping into my everyday life! I let out a lot of steam tonight, even things I didn’t plan on telling him. The only things I left out, honestly, were anything related to the turtles to hide their identity. And to avoid any irrelevant questions.
He seemed strangely chipper hearing all of this, a curiously amused smirk plastered on his face. Not the reaction I expected, but I guess it’s better than him flipping out like I thought he would. 
“So, if I’m getting this right, you see me and Jaiden hanging out more often and it actually bothers you?”
“I don’t want it to but yeah, it bothers me a whole fucking lot. It’s taken over my life and I hate it! I hate being jealous! It’s so—“ 
“You’re jealous!? You’re jealous! Oh man, I can’t believe I am living in the same timeline where the Salena Moni is experiencing jealousy like every. Average. Lowlife. Person!” 
“Yeah, yeah, go ahead and rub it in, why dontcha? That helps me so much.” I pouted.
He laughed, enjoying my misery. “I know, I’m sorry. Just, damn! Somewhere, pigs are flying aren’t they?” If Meat Sweats could fly, I’d be his murderous Cupid.
“Har har. I get it though. I mean, you know me! I’ve felt envious before, but jealous? How does anyone even deal with this…?” I held myself a little tighter.
“Hey, hey, it’s okay, Dove. It happens! Everyone gets a little jealous. It’s a normal thing to go through, Salena.”
“Yeah, I sure did want a normal life, so I guess I got what I wished for.” I can’t help feeling salty over all this. 
He only laughed and patted my hair, fluffing up the ponytail a little. 
“Hey, Zane? For the sake of my psyche, you sure I’m not a bad person for this?”
A tender sigh rang through my ears. “I’m sure. You could never be a bad person, Salena.” 
…I never realized a husky voice like his could feel so honeyed.
But he’s right. I’m not a bad person, I’m just human. If both him and Raph said the same thing, it’s more likely to be true.
“And for the record, Jaiden and I are just friends right now. There’s nothing going on between us, so you don’t have to worry.”
“Uh… Cool? I… might be a little lost here. Why are you telling me that?”
“Reassurance, obviously.”
I blinked, not really getting it or knowing how to respond. He thought for a moment, then had a face of realization while he giggled.
“Oh my god, don’t tell me you’re actually that innocent! You’re so cute, I swear!” He booped my nose and leaned in again with a huge smile. He lowered his voice almost to a whisper. “You’re jealous because you have a crush.” 
A crush?
“But why would I have a crush on Jaiden?” 
“I’m just saying—Wait, rewind. A crush on Jaiden?” He physically paused for a bit before awkwardly laughing. “No, sweetie, you don’t get jealous of your crush, you get jealous of the people they’re with!”
“That’s why I’m asking. Why would I have a crush on Jaiden?”
…Why does the air feel colder all of a sudden? 
The night was warm just a minute ago, but now it’s dead like the core of winter. His smile is long gone. His eyes, they’re slicing me in half. Is my breathing a little faster? He’s coming closer. I’m suddenly aware of just how alone we really are here in this silent little street. 
“To be clear. Who are you jealous of.”
My throat clogged up. I blinked and lowered my eyes so he wouldn’t see the tears being fought back. I forgot this side of him, too. The side that made my heart close in on itself.
“Salena, don’t make me ask twice.”
“Of you.” I managed to let out. “J-jealous of you.”
He wouldn’t speak for a while. Only felt him staring me down like a predator stalking its prey, making me swallow to keep my throat from drying up. My hands felt so clammy, begging me to wipe them on my skirt. But I didn’t dare move. I couldn’t even look at him right now.
“Of fucking course you are.”
I knew it was coming, but I still flinched when he cursed with no shame, tugging his hair and punching the wall next to me. It’s stupid, isn’t it? I can handle giant mutants and a literal cult of evil, but Zane’s temper was not something to be messed with, and my unlucky ass did exactly that.
“Why did I ever expect anything different! Of course it’s me you’re jealous of! Why the fuck would you phrase it like that if you meant something else, god dammit!”
You’re gonna bleed if you keep doing that…
“Z-Zane, I’m sorry. I-I didn’t think it’d come off as me being jealous of Jaiden—“
“OBVIOUSLY, IT FUCKING WOULD!!!” He grabbed my shoulders, bringing me closer to him. I don’t know if it’d be an exaggeration to say I nearly got a panic attack from the action alone. 
“When you say things like how you’re jealous of how much time Jaiden and I spend together, of course I think you’re jealous of them, not me! Why would I ever assume it was me! That never happens with anyone else! God, you’re such a fucking moron sometimes, I swear!” 
“I'm sorry… P-please stop…”
“After everything we’ve fucking been through, everything I did for you! All you can ever do is somehow relate me back to Jaiden! There’s always someone else! I mean nothing to you, Salena! Don’t I!? I! Mean! Nothing!”
“I-I didn’t mean to, I promise—”
“THAT DOESN’T MATTER, IDIOT!”
He let go and pushed me back. Sometimes I overlook how much bigger Zane is compared to me. This is not one of those times. 
“You know what? You know what’s funny, Salena? That night you’re so fucking fixated on, the one that’s consumed your ability to even think like a normal person? Yeah, I’ve got some news about that night.” 
I just want to disappear…
“I asked Jaiden to go with me to that shitty party on purpose!”
What?
“I asked them on purpose, I posted those pictures on purpose! I did everything ‘cause I knew you’d see it! I thought maybe then, for once, you’d finally, finally feel a single ounce of longing for me! That was all I wanted!”
What.
“…You better be lying, Zane.”
“I’m not. And you deserve this.”
I glared at him the entire time while he was too focused on his own bullshit words to even notice. My arms burned with the sensation of my nails digging deeper and deeper. I hope they'll draw blood.
“You don’t understand, Salena! You keep saying all these… all these stupid fucking things that no one else says to me! Do you know what it does to me? If I had my way, I’d hold you forever and never let you go. No one’s shown me kindness like you.”  I was so numb I couldn’t even react to him caressing my cheek. Only kept glaring. 
“But then you barely ever give me the time of day! You’re barely ever with me! Fuck, honestly, you’re never with me anymore! I don’t know what’s going on, but it’s not like you to say one thing and do another! You’re not that type of two-faced asshole! So why are you fucking acting like one!? Ever since that day you went to ‘hang out’ with that stupid drugged-out bitch you called a friend, you’ve never been the fucking same! With the way you act, I wouldn’t be fucking surprised if you got addicted and stay on the high 24/7!”
He’s… Is he talking about Mikey? That’s what this is about? Is he fucking serious right now.
“Who are you!? Where is my Salena?” 
“Did you know Jaiden and I had plans that day?”
“No, I didn’t. I’m not stupid, I wasn’t gonna go that far. I wanted you to get a taste of what it felt to not be chosen, that’s it! Obviously, it was dumb to think it would work!” The dumb bitch sighed, exasperated. As if he had any right to be. “Seems you don’t have room for me in that big heart of yours after all, huh? Maybe I’m a dick for saying this, but it’s honestly karma that I happened to choose the one day you two were gonna hang out. That’s gotta be a sign, Salena.”
You never get the fucking hint, do you Zane Evans?
“I need to go.”
I couldn’t even get two steps in before he gripped my wrist to stop me.
“Wait, what do you mean go? Go where?”
“I meant exactly what I said! I’ve had enough. Now let go of me.”
I yanked my arm back and stormed off, Zane following close behind. At least, judging from the sound he was. I didn’t bother looking back. 
“Hey! Your place is in the opposite direction!”
“Stop following me, I can go wherever I want!”
“Salena, seriously!? It’s already late, you’re gonna get lost! Come on, are you really that pissed off—”
“YES!!!”
I turned my heel and faced him.
“How are you even unsure of that!? You got upset I hung out with someone else for one day—a person I made plans with in advance, might I add—and you decided to take revenge on me!? Do you have any clue how fucked up that is!?”
“I got a little mad! So what? You’ve known me for two years! Stop overreacting about a harmless dig!”
“Harmless!? You have no idea what I’ve gone through this past month because of your little ‘harmless’ stunt! I’ve suffered so much because of you! I can’t even sleep because of you! God, sometimes you’re so—Ugh!”
I began counting down from ten to one, just like Raph taught. I shouldn’t say something I’ll regret later. Honestly, I shouldn’t have said anything at all.
He looked like a sad puppy. It’s clear he wasn’t expecting this. But somehow, my sympathy won’t halt my anger tonight.
“Salena, I… Look, I didn’t know you’d be so sensitive over this—“
“Zane, I really need to leave. I’m sorry I exploded like that, but it’s gonna happen again if I stay here any longer. So please, just stop following me. Hurting you would add more shit to my plate and I really don’t need that right now, okay?” 
“N-no! Stay! I can make it up to you!”
“Another day, any day, but not now! Not now.”
I walked away and this time he didn’t follow. 
“…Fine.”
I heard his footsteps stomp in the other direction, slowly fading away.
My own legs went faster till the wind consumed me. 
The anger returned almost instantly after I knew he left. I’m happy I kept my cool during the end back there but holy fucking shit! What was he thinking!? I wanted answers tonight but I didn’t expect this! I thought I was overthinking again! I thought my brain made up the possibility that they ditched me intentionally! But no, turns out it wasn’t just Jaiden but Zane, too! What the fuck did I do to them? What did he mean I “deserved it”!? 
I don’t get it, what is he expecting me to do? I know he… feels a certain way about me. But even then! I can’t just shit romantic feelings for him out my ass! 
Ugh, so fucking stupid. I’m gonna lose my head if I keep thinking about this.
I wandered around the city some more and got back to the main road where a good handful of cars were passing again. It’s past 1am now and I’ve gotta get ready for school in less than five hours. But I know damn well I won’t sleep, not after this. I don’t wanna go home. Take me anywhere but home. I don’t feel like facing any of this right now, I…
I want somewhere I can feel safe for a while, just so the day won’t end on such a horrible note.
I pulled out my phone and opened the contacts. I wish I was one of those folks who didn’t have to think of someone before they dialed but alas, here I am. 
I can’t talk to Jaiden. 
I obviously can’t talk to Zane.
I don’t know if I can tell Casey any of this yet.
I’d love to talk to April but she’s probably asleep by now. But… but the guys might not be! They’re usually up at these sort of freakish hours of the night. I could try giving the group chat a call and hope for the best. I feel bad for bothering them so often but who else do I have right now?
It took three rings before the line went through.
“You are conversing with Donatell—Why is your screen so dark?” 
Oh fucking lovely.
“H-hey, Donnie. Sorry, I didn’t realize it was a video call.”
As my luck would have it, Donnie was the one to pick up. No offense to him; he never did anything wrong. I’m just not entirely sure how he feels about me yet. So, having him answer when I’m already high on nerves isn’t what I pictured hoping for the best would result in. But he’s much, much better than being alone right now.
“Uh, what… Whatcha up to?”
“Oh, simply being my usual genius self to aid with our nightly hero duties! Sure, no regular teenager could detect a break-in on sensitive confidential info before the actual government could, but I, Othello Von Ryan, have proven to be no regular teen!” 
“Yep, definitely the usual for you.” 
Donnie’s def no less than Leo when it comes to being allergic to humility. Though, they both earned their egos. Donnie’s not wrong; not just any person could be nearly as smart as him.
“So, did you need anything fixed? You’re calling at a rather unusual hour for a school night.” 
“Oh, no, not really. I mean, I was kinda out with a friend, but things… ended abruptly. I don’t really feel like sleeping right now. I wanted some company?” 
He opened his mouth to respond but got interrupted by a familiar accent asking who was on the phone. The instant my name left his voice, three others repeated it with joy. My screen suddenly overflowed with four green goofballs all trying to fit in the camera’s scope at once.
“SALENA! How are you? How come you’re not asleep? Don’t you have school tomorrow?”
“Mikey, it’s Salena, it’s way too early for them to sleep.”
“Wow, Leo, anyone ever tell you how funny you are?” My words didn’t match my tone. I wonder why.
“Leo, let ‘er breathe!” The camera shook as a red bandana came into frame. “Hey, but for real. Why you up so late, Salena? Somethin’ up?”
“Nah, just couldn’t sleep! I thought I’d call you guys for a bit, but from the sounds of it, y’all seem kinda busy.” 
The camera moved again as the device got transferred to the next turtle. “Give me my—Ugh, there we go. And yes, you’re correct. We are actually busy with a mission tonight.” 
I tried keeping my smile intact as I understandingly nodded my head. Is he mad at me for assuming they were free the exact moment I needed them to be? I mean, I’d be mad at me, so it’d make sense.
“Hey, but you know what?” Leo leaned next to Donnie, trying to see the screen. “You should totally join us! Tag along, have some fun, we’d all love that!”
You would?
“What? Nardo, what are you—“
“OMIGOSH, YEAH!” Mikey jumped in, knocking Donnie out of frame entirely. “If you’re not gonna sleep, we should totally hang out! I really miss you, Salena!” 
“Uh, am I really the only one thinking it would be a bad idea to let the person who barely leaves their house join us on a mission to a highly-secured and regulated government facility?”
“Chillax, Don, she’ll be fine! You’ll be fine, right Salena?”
“I mean, uh—” 
“See? What’d I tell ya, totally fine!” 
“Raph agrees! Salena can handle herself.” 
“Oh sure, I’m absolutely positive nothing could go wrong! He said without a trace of doubt.”
…I can’t tell if he’s trying to protect me or just doesn’t want me there. Neither option feels good right now, to be honest.
“C’mon, Dee, we’ve all seen her fight before! Including you, remember? When they helped us stop Meat Sweats?”
 Mikey’s got a point. That was before I had any real battle experience, too! I don’t know why Donnie seems so hesitant about this. Or why it’s making me so pissy, actually.
Another car passed by and I lowered the volume a bit, remembering the time. Now that I’m actually near some apartments, I don’t wanna accidentally wake someone up. I really gotta save up for some new earbuds; my last ones broke like, a month ago and I can only make do for so long.
“Three to one, hermano. You’re outnumbered.”
“But—Sigh, forget it! Salena, I—“
“‘NOUGH SMALL TALK!” At this point, they’re just playing hot potato with Donnie’s phone. “Salena, hurry up! We’re boutta start the mission so don’t want ya missin’ out!”
“Ha! Almost made a pun!”
“Shut up, Leo. Anyways, we’re at uh… Uh… Hey, Donnie, where we at?” 
I could hear him struggling for his phone in the distance. “You could just send our coordinates!”
“I could send her our coordinates! …How does Raph do that, again?”
The audio muffled as the phone shuffled back to its rightful owner. “God, I’m so gonna install security on this thing. Anyway, I’m sending our location to you right now. And as I was GOING TO SAY BEFORE! Salena, I look forward to seeing you again.”
He flashed a smile and part of my worries vanished. I’m still not sure how to read him but if he’s being nice, it can’t be all bad, right?
“OH, AND IF YA CAN, COULD YOU BRING ME A SNACK—“ Donnie hung up before the teddy bear could finish.
Luckily for him, his face beamed when I finally arrived around twenty minutes later and did, in fact, bring him a snack. 
“Hey guys! Hope I didn’t take—“
I couldn’t even finish speaking before finding myself laughing on the floor with four giant turtles hounding me in hugs. 
“It has been way too long since we’ve hugged!” Poor Mikey, I haven’t been able to see him in a hot minute. “Nice ponytail, by the way. Really makes your eyes pop.”
“Aww, thanks! I missed you guys too. Ugh, I really wish scheduling was easier! I’d hang out more often.” 
“Dude, why waste time on schedules when you could just come over?”
“‘Xactly! Ain’t like you’re not welcome!”
“Oh. I-I mean, sure! If you guys really don’t have a problem with it…” I wonder if this is what it’s like to feel wanted.
“I just wanted you to get a taste of what it felt to not be chosen!”
…T-then again, they’re probably just being polite.
Click!
“And fits perfectly, just as the estimations foretold!” The fuck? 
I looked down and saw a shiny black belt matching the arm wraps now resting above my hips. It’s actually fairly loose around my waist but I’m guessing that was the intention. There’s a giant pink button on the left with the same M-shaped logo as all of theirs. It looked super cool, honestly! Even seemed to match with my outfit!
“Woaaah, what is this thing?”
“Donnie. Really?” Leo didn’t sound impressed and neither did the others but, like, who cares! The belt’s dope as hell!
He ignored them and continued addressing me. “It basically functions both as your very own panic button and is a carrier for your sickles thanks to a highly specific magnetic attraction! Plus, it obviously helps tie in your outfit better ‘cause Great Galileo did you need some accessories.”
“Damn, I didn’t know my sickles were magnetic!”
“Oh, they weren’t before, I installed magnets in them last night.” With that, he pulled my fucking weapons seemingly out of his ass. Judging by everyone else’s groans though, I’m the only one who’s surprised and confused.
“Donald! What did we say about breaking into strangers’ homes!” 
“Hey, I didn’t break in!… to a stranger’s home! I broke into Salena’s, Salena is not a stranger—OW, HEY!” Raph slapped the back of his head. One quick yet dramatic recovery later, we all began our route of sneaking into the building. 
Security wasn’t monitoring the higher floors, so we only had to ninja our way up ‘till there and the rest was easy peasy. I tried focusing on the quick briefing I was receiving on the way up but my mind was admittedly elsewhere. Back to the weird situation I thought I dreamt up last night.
I don’t remember much. I was too tired to really register anything, and Donnie being a ninja probably enhanced that. But I do remember still hearing faint footsteps in my room; drawers being opened, the closet getting browsed. I was so out of it I figured I probably hallucinated everything. Either way, I was way too paralyzed to do anything; I couldn’t even put my phone back earlier. Kept passing in and out of consciousness. But it seemed like someone put it back for me. They helped my sloppy body into a position that wouldn’t leave me aching the next morning and pulled the covers up to tuck me in. What really sealed the whole dream theory to me was the metallic-textured “hand” that patted my head before they left and let the world return to tranquility.
I seriously did figure it was all a weird fever dream or some shit. Personally, I still feel like that’s more believable than it being Donnie all along. But staring down at my sickles, I guess I can’t really argue against the proof right in front of me. 
“Gentlemen, here we are! The Techno Cosmic Research Institute! Otherwise known as”—the door opened as I returned back to present time—“The TCRI.”
The moon illuminated the flat, revealing that we were in a main lobby of some sorts. Huge and spacious, decorated with different plants I’m sure Zane would’ve gone crazy over. 
…I shouldn’t think about him right now.
It was a huge and spacious lobby full of plants. The windows that were tinted from the outside now presented a full view of the city skyline. Doors were carved into the walls, transitioning to the other rooms. Some, like the several meeting rooms, were made with glass so I could vaguely make out the interior from here. Others were blocked by heavy, solid, metal doors, holding whatever secrets the government had behind them.
I felt strange setting foot in this place, like I wasn’t supposed to be here. Well, I guess we are breaking and entering, but it’s not that. It’s something else, something I can’t quite explain. Unrelated to the guys but personal to me. I feel I’m not wanted for a reason I’m not yet aware of. It’s freaking me out a little. 
“So, what do the Purple Dragons want with this place again?”
“Honestly, your guess is as good as mine. I only caught a break-in to the system in general and tracked it back to Kendra, I don’t have info on what they’re trying to gain access to. Whatever it is, though, it has an impressively tight security system that’s nearly impossible to break! At least, not through their simple B-tier remote hacking.”
“If the Purple Dragons want it, then it’s gotta be something major.” I’ve known about them for a while thanks to April. 
It kinda shocked me at first, not because a group of teens created a tech-smart gang but because April O’Neil was a loser to someone. Call me a little biased—and you’d be right—but I still think Kendra’s got rocks for brains if she ignores someone like April. 
But that’s a mental essay for another day. Right now, Leo’s smirking. And if Leo’s smirking, things will either go amazingly well or horrifically wrong. 
“So… If we’re already here, why don’t we just figure out what they want ourselves?”
Mikey propped his chin up on Leo’s shoulder. “You mean like, go and explore? Sounds rad to me!”
“Yeah! Sneak around, let Donnie do his nerdy smart people stuff and see what’s so great about this place, yeah?” 
“Invade the privacy of our nation’s government and scavenge for confidential data!? Nardo, I love you!”
“Raph? Your call, buddy.”
He was shockingly quick to shrug. “Sure! Raph don’t see a problem with it. Sounds hella fun to me!”
“Uh, guys?” I raised my hand. “Isn’t this, like, highly illegal?” 
“And?” They all said in unison. To be fair, legal doesn’t sound like them anyway. 
“What are they gonna do? Arrest us?” His hand circled in front of his blue bandana.
“And don’t worry, you won’t get in trouble for anything that happens! Donnie can get rid of the evidence and no one will know you were here, right Dee?” Mikey shot a wink at Donnie.
“Affirmative!” 
Dang, Mikey’s made a lot of good points tonight. 
“Eh, you’re right. To hell with laws!” Passing up an opportunity to explore a space institution would be laughably unlike me, anyway! 
We decided to split up and meet back at the main lobby in fifteen, assuming the Purple Dragons hadn't arrived by then. It’s kind of scary wandering on my own in this place. It still feels off to me, but at the same time, I’ve always wanted so desperately to walk through a facility like this. Fascinating space research, meeting after meeting to discuss whatever new breakthrough was made, access to a shit ton of databases and technologies I’ll never have the chance to use at home!? Everything about this place is perfect! It’s all I dreamed it to be. 
So why won’t that damn feeling go away?
Whatever, it’s probably just tonight in general. I really, really, need to get over it and move on already or else I’m guaranteed to fuck up the whole mission.
I sighed and glanced down at my arm wraps, raising them to get a better look. Despite my flip-floppy mood, I couldn’t help but smile. It’s dorky but they do comfort me every now and then. They felt nice to wear and even looking at them made me all fuzzy and nostalgic. They feel like an older me even though I got them recently. 
“I take it you liked them, then.” 
His voice startled me, I thought everyone went their own ways but I guess Donnie was nearby. 
“Yeah, I do! The belt, too, they’re really cool gifts! Thank you.” He lit up when he heard those magic words. Man, I can’t believe I forgot to thank him sooner. Poor guy was probably aching for some feedback.
“I-I actually always wondered how you made them. They feel really sturdy but like, it’s not heavy to wear, either, if that makes sense.”
“Oh yeah, totally!” He typed on the screen on his arm, booting up the scanning feature to make sure we didn’t miss anything. “It’s an intentional design choice. They are supposed to act as armor, so.”
“Woah, cool! Do they count as tactical gear? As in military grade and all that jazz?”
“What? No, that’s not even good quality, that’s just a buzzword. Military grade simply means they met the minimum stated requirements at the lowest unit price.”
“…”
“…Low budget, few money, lead to mid product, good enough for gullible minds and general public consumption.” 
Ohhhh. “So they lied.”
“As per usual. It’s shit engineering in actuality.”
I pushed open one of the meeting rooms’ glass doors as Donnie’s shell held up a bright torch. We began scouting the area for anything interesting while continuing our talk. All this investigative work’s reminding me of April and the way she’d gush about doing the same. Completely understanding the appeal now; it feels so thrilling snooping around somewhere you’re not supposed to be! Especially when the law’s involved.
The room wasn’t anything unordinary. It looked like any other corporate meeting room. The long table leading to the small TV on the wall, decorative paintings and plants, the usual. Man, we probably should’ve gone into a more interesting—“OW!”
“…Watch your step.” He said after I already fell to my knees.
“Thanks for the very useful warning. What even was that?”
He shined the light closer to a… metal? No, definitely not entirely metal. A robot arm sloppily plopped on the floor. We couldn’t see what the arm was attached to, if it was attached to anything at all. It’s too long to trace back with the torch light from where we are. One thing’s for sure, though: It’s giant. The claw I tripped over is practically the same size as my head. 
“Hmm…” He crouched closer to the arm, slowly inspecting it. “Weird. It looks like it’s made of some cheap plastic. Perhaps a prototype of some sorts.”
“I don’t think they’d make it this big if it was a prototype.” Maybe we could do a test to see what type of plastic it is. “You got any fire?”
“While I see your angle and would love to carry through that experiment, it’s probably not wise to burn something we don’t know the purpose of. Or, you know, alert the security of our presence from the alarms.”
“Yeah, fair…” Man, would’ve been hella fun, though. 
We both stayed on the floor, a little stumped on what the hell this thing was. My eyes got bored after a while and wandered around the room again. The only interesting thing in here was this weird ass plastic arm, it’s pretty much useless looking around the room but it did keep me entertained. There were five plants in this room which explains the fresh smell, all of them were basic enough for me to recognize. Two zebra plants, a ponytail palm, and…
I ignored the plant on the table when I spotted something thin underneath it, hidden by the shadows. I think it’s a slip of paper?
Donnie’s sigh brought my attention back. “You know what, I’m gonna go to their computer lab to see if one of their databases has anything about this thing.”
“Aight, I’ll stay back and keep exploring. Good luck!”
Right as he left, I sped over to the mysterious paper, unable to contain my curiosity any longer. The table was tall enough for me to comfortably sit under, leaning over the paper on the floor to read it. It’s, coincidentally enough, about that puzzling arm. The incomplete text made it clear it was probably part of a stack of paper or a file and fell out. Sadly, it didn’t reveal much but what I could get out of it was that it’s an automated arm controlled by an AI system, mostly covered with polypropylene plastic. Heh, PP plastic. Oh, it was created for the purpose of security. Well that’s just fantastic. I should go warn the boys about it.
I quickly snapped a pic of the loose sheet, almost getting out from under the table.
…But I’m glad as hell I didn’t.
I heard it. A soft, mechanical hum as something slithered off the ground. I grabbed my sickles from their belt, trying to minimize my shaking. It took a few blinks and tries but I managed to turn invisible, watching the machine move through the darkness. How was it suddenly on?
Its movements were smooth and natural. Too natural for something meant to be robotic. It’s so eerily graceful, slithering through the air. The arm swiveled its claw around like an animal head checking its surroundings. It… It’s looking where I am. It’s looking at me. It shouldn’t be able to see me, I’m not supposed to be visible! But it won’t stop staring.
”FUCK!” I shrieked when it lunged at me, quickly slicing it before it could grab me. Thank god it’s just plastic… Why the fuck is it hollow? 
That doesn’t make any sense! Shouldn’t there be wiring or something? Even if not to connect the AI, how the hell can it move like that without anything to mimic muscle!? 
I gasped, turning my head to the side. I can hear something else. It’s gooey and mushy and… 
It’s looping around the room.
It’s getting louder.
”W-what the hell?”
…I think I can see it now. Something solid but stretchy, resembling thick vines climbing up the plastic arm. I backed up, watching as it crawled over to the newly severed claw. It pulled the claw back to its other half and tightened around them. It glowed? A sickeningly blinding green color. Before I realized what was going on, the claw suddenly reattached as the vines slinked back into the darkness. 
It saw me again and the chase resumed. 
It’s so damn fast, I can barely outrun it! Dodging is saving my ass but it keeps knocking over any furniture I used against it! 
I jumped when I heard Donnie from the comms. Wait, he installed comms on my arm wraps? 
“What’s making all that racket? Everything okay over there?”
”You can hear that!?”
”Yeah, I’m literally right next door?”
”Well—SHIT!” Too fucking close, too fucking close! It almost fucking grabbed me! Fuck, my knees hurt from that! “SON OF A—Don’t worry, I can handle it! I’ll explain soon!”
I tried getting off the floor as quickly as possible but the claw pulled me back down. The four sharp grippers opened up like a mouth and a fucking chainsaw came out. It went straight for my head, life flashing before my eyes as my sickles blocked it by pure reflex, holding it back. It won’t back off! I can’t keep pushing forever! How the hell do I get out of this!?
“FIBONACCI!” 
A spinning titanium blur whacked the arm back, grabbing its attention to the maniacally smiling turtle now dashing through the room. His arm reached out, grabbing his staff from mid-air, and chopped off the robot arm with a giant drill. I curled in on myself right before a bright, violet shield spread over me and kept the arm’s falling metal parts from landing on me.
“You know, that did not seem like ‘handling it’.” 
My vision cleared to his hand offering to help me up. I’m suddenly getting deja vu from the other countless times my helpless damsel-wannabe ass needed a rescue. Panicked and guilt-ridden, I waved it off and got up on my own. 
“We gotta get outta here right now!”
“What? Why? I already—”
The vines returned and began repeating their process of fixing the arm. Though this time, it seems to be going faster.
“Oh my banana pancakes! What is that!?”
“I don’t know but that’s why we’re leaving! Come on!”
I grabbed his hand and we ran out the room, running into the others in the main lobby.
”Leo! There’s—”
“Crazy killer robot arms, we know. Was just in the middle of talking about that, actually.” He gave a glance of disapproval to the pouting red giant next to Mikey. Who also looks hella annoyed. It would appear we’ve walked in on a teensy squabble. 
I heard Donnie sigh beside me “Raph, please tell me you didn’t.” He left my clueless ass standing there to join in on their talk.
Wait—Oh god, not again!
Turning around, I grabbed my sickles. I heard it again. Managed to dodge just in time for its jab to my right. It seems the guys are too busy to notice and I really don’t wanna burden them again. I’ll solo this one!
“When I said we should go explore, I didn’t mean go ‘round pushing things! We’re in a government building, why would you touch anything!?”
I heard another hit coming and blocked it with the blade. 
Yeah, I-I can totally take this! I should let them finish their conversation—Holy fuck, there’s more than one, fucking end my suffering already. 
”I didn’t mean to! You guys know I got a weak spot, what was I supposed to do? If they didn’t want Raph to push the big, red button, maybe they shouldn’t make it big ‘n red!” 
“Buddy, that’s not how that works and you know that.”
There’s three of them now and they’re so unreasonably fast! It’s so hard to keep up! Ugh, it almost feels like I am being punished after all. 
My accidental yelp luckily got drowned by Mikey’s groan. “Man, just let it go! We can smell your ‘I know I fucked up but don’t wanna admit it ‘cause I’m the big brother’ stench!”
”THAT’S A DIFFERENT STENCH!”
”AHH!” 
I really didn’t mean to blurt that out but the claw dug into my leg and yanked me off the ground! Guilt aside, it’s probably a good thing I caught their attention, especially since I dropped my sickles like a fucking moron!
“SALENA!” His sword slashed through the air but got promptly blocked and thrown back by another metal claw. A scary amount of them are showing up now! The guys are completely surrounded and I’m stuck useless, dangling in the air!
One of the arms came closer and opened its grippers, a scanner popping out this time, its red beam blinding my eyes. My breathing grew shallow, the commotion from below fading away. I’m getting lightheaded from being suspended upside down. I need to get out of this situation. But there’s nothing I can do. Just squint past the light and anxiously wait for its next move. 
My ears burned from the claw’s monstrous shriek. It sounds like a fucking animalistic version of nails on a chalkboard! Why did it react to me like this? Why me? Aren’t we all intruders? Why is it just me!?
“You deserve this.”
Was he right?
I didn’t process getting swung in the air until I was let go with enough momentum to cause a crash through the decor. My arms shook as I tried lifting my body up. Everything hurts, everything fucking hurts! My ears, my arms, my legs! My head! I just wanted a little distraction tonight! Why is this happening?
Is this really my karma?
…Wait a sec.
When I managed to lift my head, I came face to face with a crack in the wall where the robot arms were emerging from. The vines I saw earlier turned out to be permanently merged with the arms at the roots and lead to… something behind the wall. The crack was too small to properly make much out but it looked like it was breathing?
Whatever, I don’t have time to be surprised. “Guys! The arms! They’re coming from over here!” 
The crack’s small but just big enough for something slim! Like—
The claw dug into my leg once again and began dragging me away. “Leo! Donnie! One of your weapons can fit through!” 
“Got it!”
“I’ll cover!”
Flashes of blue scattered around the lobby. Each portal and throw of his sword brought Leo closer and closer to the wall. I couldn’t watch for too long, though, as I found myself back in the air again. It froze my skin getting thrown across the room faster than before. This time, towards the glass windows. 
Chains grabbed at my ankle and yanked me back to the ground away from my disastrous fate. I looked up to see the tangerine flashing a confident yet relieved smile at me. “Hey!”
“…Hey!” 
Mystic metal clinked as Mikey pulled back some of the robot arms chasing after Leo to buy him more time. Raph and Donnie quickly shifted gears and guarded me to make sure the plastic freaks couldn’t grab me again. Mikey continued to aid Leo, bouncing all over the room, keeping the arms distracted with his flow and somehow, still bringing them back to where he originally stood: Away from Leo. 
Finally, a sword was heard stabbing through the air and splashing through a soft, squishy substance. The arms dropped to the floor as the thing in the wall hissed in pain, slowly leading to the dreadfully awaited silence at last.
Mikey reached his hand out for me and pulled me up. “You good?”
“Not dead, yeah.” 
“Guess that’s a start.”
I glanced to the side at Donnie staring blankly at me, confused until he walked over and held one of my arms to examine my wrap. 
“Hmm, I wonder if there’s some modification I can do to your gloves that prevents your sickles from getting so easily lost.” I guess that’s why he was staring a minute ago. 
“Honestly, that’d be great. I keep losing them, so…”
“Yeah, I was thinking—“ 
“Nerd-talk later! Do a med scan!” Leo shoved him out the way and accidentally knocked Mikey back. Didn’t seem like he noticed since he immediately started checking me for injuries. I don’t even know when he got here?
Donnie sighed but went through with it anyway, tapping on his wrist as he checked my vitals. “No broken bones, no internal bleeding, nothing too concerning to report thankfully. Salena, do you feel alright?” 
“Mhm! Just some scratches here and there but I’ll live.” 
“Just some scratches, hm? You forgettin’ something?” Leo pointed down to my horrifically bruised and bloody leg. Whoops.
“…I-I’ll still live.”
While Leo took care of bandaging my leg, the rest of us spent the next few minutes catching our breaths. Mikey laid on the floor, limbs starfished out, while Donnie was texting April and catching her up to speed. I can only imagine how devastated she’d be in the morning, finding out she missed all this action. It’d have been nice having her here, honestly. 
Raph wasn’t near us, though. He stood by the wall where the once-breathing specimen was at. He kept peeking through the crack, rubbing his arm and looking hesitant about something.
“Raph?” My voice prompted the others to turn their attention to him.
“…Nobody else wonderin’ what the hell this thing could be? I know we’re only here to stop the Purple Dinos—“
“That’s Purple Dragons, Raphala.”
“—Whatever! But really, guys! After all that, we just gonna head home and forget about it?” 
He’s not wrong.
Come to think of it, this place is government funded. There should be no reason why some foreign entity exists in a place like the TCRI. They’re supposed to do space research and nothing else. That’s what they’re paid for.
“You know what?” Donnie turned his phone off. “I could work on hacking through their system myself. I don’t know if it’ll prove successful, but I can try.”
I felt Mikey’s head drop on my shoulder. He sure loves doing that. “What do we do about the vine thingies?” 
“Well, we can’t just—“ Leo paused, making eye contact with Raph. They shared a smirk and nodded.
“You thinkin’ what thinkin’ big bro?”
He chuckled, punching his fists together. “You bet!”
A bright red aura surrounded his figure as his arm reeled back and locked the sais in his hands.
“POWER PUNCH JUTSU!!!”
My body staggered as the ground shook upon impact, the dust clearing to reveal the tiny gap in the wall is suddenly a giant ass hole now.
“Man, y’all really don’t give a shit about government property, do ya?” 
“Nope. But hey! It was def the right choice!” Raph’s snaggletooth gleamed through his mischievous smile.
The five of us stared through the hole, trying to comprehend the oversized specimen in front of us. It was a pulsing, yellow-green thing in the shape of a tall tube, wider on the top than the bottom. There were reddish lines on it zigzagging up and down almost like veins. It was punctured at its middle, caused by the blade of the katana that shot right through it a few moments ago. 
“Ya know, it kind of resembles a plant. Which would explain the mystery vines, actually.”
“What plant, then? Ain’t no plant Raph knows of that throbs.”
He shook his head with a light shrug. “Sadly, I am not sure. It looks a little like a pitcher plant but also not really? They shouldn’t be luminescent or have vines emerging out like that. And also the throbbing, of course.” 
Pitcher plant, ay? I’ve heard of that. They’re my favorite out of all the carnivorous jungle plants Zane rambled about once. Plants were actually one of the first things we had a genuine bond over, even if I’m pretty clueless about them. The way his eyes lit up when talking about them with so much love and adoration just melted me.
His eyes…
His godforsaken eyes…
“Salena?”
“Huh?” How long have I been spaced out?
“You sure you’re good? You seemed kinda out of it just now.” I forgot how close Mikey was to me, I should be more careful.
“Yeah, it’s nothing.”
“Really? ‘Cause lowkey, you’ve been off all night. I didn’t wanna say anything but…”
“Oh, no, no, I’m—“
“Actually, you did mention something happened between you and your friend earlier, remember? Before you called me.” This violet ass motherfucker did not just erm actually me at the worst time ever.
“That what this about, big man? Had another fight with your friend?” Why is everyone suddenly focused on me!?
“N-Not the same one! This is someone different, I promise! T-that’s not to say I have a problem with everyone! I just… Um…” Great going, Salena! Now they’ll think you’re just insufferable and incapable of friendship! “I-I don’t think we should be—Well, we kinda have worse issues to worry about, don’t we?”
“Kendra and her yes-men ain’t here yet. What I wanna know is why you’re so spacey tonight! Dr. Feelings can’t help if he can’t know!”
“It’s nothing! N-nothing too bad, at least. He just—A-actually, it was really mostly me so um… It’s hard to explain exactly…”
Geez, my palms are annoyingly sweaty. I really don’t wanna give them the wrong idea, it was just one fight! It’s not a representation of our entire relationship! But I know from experience any time I try talking about Zane to someone, they end up hating him and I don’t want that! Fuck, I should’ve been more careful. My stupid tongue-tied gibberish ain’t helping the situation, either!
My shoulders flinched when I saw Leo stand in front of me, hand on his hip as he faced towards his brothers. “Okay, hermanos, give her some space! Stop smothering! I know we’re all worried, I’m worried too, but if Salena doesn’t wanna talk, they shouldn’t be forced to.”
The others finally piped down. None of them looked happy about it—understandably so—but it seemed Leo was able to convince them to drop it, anyway. I really owe him one. 
He peeked over his shoulder to glance back at me. “If you do wanna talk about something, though, we’re here for you.” 
…It’s not that I don’t want to. I just don’t see how it’d help anything— 
CRASH!!!
HOLY FUCKING SHIT, HAVE WE NOT HAD ENOUGH SURPRISES FOR ONE NIGHT!?
“Good going, Jase. Real quiet of you.”
All of us, equally tense and gripping our weapons to stand guard, took a solid minute to process that the loud crash wasn’t another dumbass robot-plant-arm thing, but instead was Kendra and the other two stumbling through the main door they hacked open. Speak of the dragons and they arrive, I suppose.
She looked over at us and her sharp eyes drooped lower. “Of course.” 
I only ever knew Kendra before tonight, none of the other members. Hate her guts since she’s forever engraved as April’s bully in my mind and doesn’t seem to have changed. Her movements and mannerisms still match the coy, conniving person I remember her to be, walking over in such a smug, superior way that screams “greater than thou”. Once, back when they were still in high school, April had a mini breakdown due to college applications kicking her ass. She was struggling and stressing over not getting accepted into a good amount of her options and believed she’d have to rely solely on her safeties at that point. Kendra really rubbed it in. Wouldn’t shut up about it, demeaning her for being a failure. 
April knows damn well to never take Kendra seriously. However, it’s not a surprise those words still stung considering how stupidly frightening the whole college process is. Joke’s on Kendra, though. One of April’s main choices that had her wait-listed ended up accepting her in! As for Kendra? All hypocritical bark, no bite it seems. 
“Hello, Von Ryan. How’s life?”
“Good, good. How about you, enjoying your—what’d you call it? ‘Intellectual freedom’?” 
“Low blow even for you. You guys couldn’t fuck around here with your little toys another night?” She scoffed and rolled her eyes, her arms crossed over her chest. Her gaze drifted towards me as her brows furrowed more. 
“Who’s that—Hold up. You… Yeah, I remember you!” She’s doing that annoying fake-nice tone she uses sometimes, the one that makes me wanna punch her in the face. “You’re that idiot kid April wouldn’t shut up about tutoring last year! What’s a teacher’s pet like you doing here?”
Mikey gasped and covered my ears like a parent to a toddler witnessing sailor-speak. “Hey! Don’t you dare talk about our friend like that!” 
I honestly couldn’t care less what Kendra says about me. Personally, I’m more focused on the other two, right now. It’s my first time ever seeing them, I think Donnie said their names were Jason and Jeremy? They’ve been pretty quiet so far, standing at her side and smirking like Saturday-morning cartoon lackeys. One of them had a large, blocky figure, dark skin, and dyed green hair. His gold visor looked pretty cool, I’ll admit. The other—I could guess from his hunched demeanor alone—was definitely their token punching bag. He’s got these awkward gloves that are way too big for his hands. Dark eyes, short, black hair, and round… glasses…
NO FUCKING WAY!
“YOU—HIM! OH MY GOD! NOOOO, NO-NO-NO-NO! NO! NO!” Ain’t no motherfucking way this bitch is who I think he is, this has to be a prank! It has to! For the sake of my sanity! Oh, but it isn't! It’s fucking real!
“...Salena? You doin’ okay?” The others looked concerned at my sudden and dramatic outlash. Fucking of course, Donnie and Mikey wouldn’t know! Jason still had the bag over his head when he was around them! Fuck, why didn’t I just take it off right there!?
“Jason! That asshole was who we saved from Meatsweats a few months ago!”
Raph and Leo looked just as lost as before. Mikey and Donnie, on the other hand, went pale with shock.
“That was you!?” Donnie’s staff pointed directly at the fucker. “Why didn’t you say anything!? I know you recognized my voice!” 
“I can’t believe Salena and I interrupted a perfectly nice day to save you of all folks! You ruined our lovely little ice cream date, dawg!”
“I was being kidnapped by a pig monster? Why would I reveal I’m a rival when you were the only help I had?”
“And yet, here you are, the very reason we’re stuck in this creepy facility, preventing you three from illegally accessing information and doing who knows what with it even though you now owe us one, YOU UNGRATEFUL MENACE!”
Before I could fix my brain enough to join in on justifiably shaming the idiot, I noticed Leo and Raph exchanging confused glances at each other.
“...What the hell is going on?”
“Raph don’t know.” They both looked at me for answers because the universe hates me.
I tearfully and shamefully explained the bullshit scenario we are now stuck in due to my impulsivity. “Donnie, Mikey, and I saved a guy from Meatsweats I think back in April? H-he had a bag over his head so they didn’t know what he looked like and I-I was the only one who saw him without it b-but I didn’t know he was part of the fucking Purple Dragons and—Fuck my life! My first ever save and it was a villain!?” The one time I actually did something useful…
God, there’s so much noise everywhere! Everyone’s arguing with each other or trying to get it to stop or whatever else is going on! My head hurts. Why did I even come here? I should’ve just went home. I should’ve stayed with Zane. I keep getting in the way, I keep making mistakes, I keep ruining things!
I have to keep my composure, though. I don’t wanna cry in a situation like this, not when I’ve already done enough harm.
“Wait a sec, where’s Jeremy?” 
We all paused, the realization clearing up as we heard a cheer from another room. “Yes! I got in! I got past the system!”
“Holy shit, he’s in the computer lab! Quick, we—” 
A bat hit Donnie straight on his stomach and knocked him back, Raph catching him so he wouldn’t fall to the floor. 
Kendra clicked her tongue as she laughed. “I gotta hand it to ya, you morons somehow turned off these stupid security systems. Definitely the most annoying part I’d have had to figure out; I guess that’s why I wanted ‘em, anyway. I don’t know how you did it but congrats! You’re not completely useless.” It looked more like she was addressing Donnie over any of us.
“But now?” She and Jason blocked the door. Her bat stood by her side. “Stay out of my fucking way.”
Obviously, that’s not happening, so chaos erupted instead. One would think a Two VS. Five would be pretty easy to handle… until they saw how well Kendra used her bat, that is. She’s faster than I expected, able to zip around before anyone could properly react. Definitely has a strong arm, too. Then, of course, there’s the traitor. Jason pushed his glasses up his nose bridge and took out his own set of weapons. Or should I say, whipped them out. ‘Cause they’re actually fucking whips. 
They were almost impossible to get by. Glowing in the dark room, buzzing from the static friction they made against each other. 
He targeted them towards Leo who barely managed to dodge just in time. Mikey, not being as lucky, got smacked right in the face.
“OW! Hey! Since when did he even have those!?” 
“Oh! Since last week, actually. I made them using—”
Either the bitch has good hearing or I was too loud when my sickle swung at his head. “Are ya dense!? How are you still tryna maintain small-talk after literally betraying us!? You know what I looked like, you wouldn’t have even said anything if I didn’t call you out! You lied to me! I saved you and you lied!”
“AH! The hell, man!? You’re gonna kill me for that!?”
“No!” The sickles weren’t sharp, only a little solid. I know I gotta resist. Unfortunately. “Just knock you out for a bit, you scheming piece of shit!” 
I wish I could say I was making up for my several blunders tonight by at least being able to handle the living embodiment of a toothpick. My leg’s not super mangled up but, surprise-surprise, it’s hard to move at my fastest and dodge with it still being injured. He’s a little impressively good with those whips, too. It’s hard keeping track of where they both are at all times, the difficulty only increased by how quick he’s able to use them considering he’s only trained for a week. I’m trying my damn best with what I can.
“Oh my god, give it up with the guilt-tripping! I’m not gonna turn on my sister just ‘cause you saved me once!”
“Hell no! I risked turning into mutant-munchies for you—Hol’ up a sec.” The pure blasphemy that came out of his mouth shocked me so bad, I actually had to pause. “Kendra’s your sister? Ew, what’s that like?”
Yet another mistake on my part. One of the whips wrapped around my sickle to fling it and I—determined to not lose them again—got shot through the air along with it. 
At this rate, I’ll be free-bird flying and crashing to the floor every five minutes. I don’t even feel like getting up anymore. Fuck, I don’t usually feel pain so easily.
Hm?
The battle ground’s a little chaotic so it’s hard to follow when in the middle of it. But, now that I’m seeing it from a distance, everyone’s intentions are suddenly ten times clearer. Kendra’s hovering towards a specific direction, dancing around the door to where Jeremy is. Jason’s distracting everyone and keeping them from paying attention to her. I have a feeling that’s very much so on purpose.
She’s starting to go in. I guess it doesn’t matter whether or not I want to, I gotta get up now. I closed my eyes and with whatever strength I had, used my sickles to turn invisible and go after her. 
I snuck by Kendra and entered the lab. Jeremy was glued to the computer, staring at a loading screen. On the side of the PC was a USB stuck to the port. Of course, accidentally saving the villain wasn’t enough! They had to use the same shitty USB we went back for, too.
“Jeremy, status report!”
“It’s almost done downloading the files! Just a few more seconds and… We got it!”
“Nice work! Quick! Toss ‘em over!”
Oh boy, if Kendra’s able to gain the instructions for those freaky arms, who knows what she’ll make with it! I can’t let them get access to anything here!
 Thus, following my usual rule of acting-without-thinking, I threw a sickle at the USB. I don’t know if it was my panic or my rage that caused it to be so sharp but it cut the USB in half mid-air and smashed straight into one of the PCs. My punishment for resorting to such destructively impulsive solutions was being greeted by the lovely melody of security sirens going off for breaking their important tech.
“No! My USB! There was so much stuff in that! Fuck!” She is so seriously distraught over the wrong thing. 
Upon retrieving my sickle, I hadn’t realized I was flickering in and out of visibility till Kendra’s bat nearly made contact with my head. “You little skeeze! Do you have any idea how much of my progress you destroyed!” 
“But that’s mine and Jason’s progress—“
“SHUT UP!” She snapped her head back to bark at him and I took my moment of escape, knocking her down out of my way. Still, she kept up by yanking at my leg and pulling me down with her, severely getting on my nerves by now.
So, I kicked her in the face.
She stayed there, groaning in pain, while her sidekick buddy checked on her. Sure, I could’ve kicked a little softer but I think a bloody nose is merciful enough for her. 
I returned to the lobby, greeted by chaos more hectic than before. The alarms and sirens were still blaring, red lights flashing on and off the entire facility. Our oh so beloved security arm friends returned in even greater numbers now! If I believed in superstition, I’d believe this night was cursed.
Jason’s looking a little overwhelmed now having to solo both the Teenage Mutant Mad Dogz and the newly emerged robot claws, yet he’s still not giving in and letting the guys go in peace. Speaking of them, they’re scattered all over the place, trying to keep themselves and each other from getting yoinked and flung like I was earlier. 
Donnie was the only one who managed to maneuver over to me.
“Salena!?” 
“Donnie! What’s going on!? Where’d the stupid arms come from!?”
“Well, I suppose it’d be impractical if they only had one source of their weird mystic high-tech robots, so there’s that.” He spun his tech-bō and whacked away the claw that was following him. “What happened in there? You disappeared and then we heard a loud crash from that room and suddenly everything got dialed up to eleven!”
“Uh, yeah, my fault, I uh—Eek!” Thank god for reflexes, the only thing that let me slice at a robot arm before it sliced me. “Good news is, I destroyed the USB they were using so Kendra can’t access the government’s whatever-the-fuck anymore! Bad news, I also accidentally destroyed one of their computers in the process, set off the security alarms, and now we’re here. Sorry, haha…” 
“You what!?”
“It was an accident, I swear! I really didn’t mean—”
“You annoying little twinkle-toes!” Kendra charged at us from behind and her bat swung directly at me. Thankfully, Donnie blocked it from knocking me dead and sent Kendra back a few steps. 
“You know what? If you got Kendra this mad, then you’re forgiven for everything on my terms! Let’s go!” He grabbed my wrist and dragged us away from the bat-wielding maniac.
Though, I’m not sure whether a metal bat or metal claws are worse. A bunch of them charged towards me now that I got back within their sight. 
“Move!” He shoved me out of the way of the monster claws.
I slid on the ground, actually keeping my balance this time, and swung at another claw coming from my right. Without having a moment to breathe, I ducked and slashed at one right above me. I would’ve missed the one coming from behind me, had Raph not been there and created a mystic shield. There’s so many all around the flat and it seems I’m still their favorite toy. 
“Salena, try hidin’ somewhere!” He punched one of the claws straight on, the impact causing a loud clunk. “They keep coming after you!” 
“I can’t! They saw me even when I turned invisible, they probably have a different type of vision or something!” 
“Infrared vision, genius!” Kendra’s bat got caught by my sickle. She aimed for my torso this time, I’m surprised it wasn’t back at my head. “They were built with thermal sensors! Which I would’ve been able to shut off if somebody didn’t break the computers!”
“God, were you built to get on people’s nerves!?” 
I’ve just about had it with her bullshit, reflected in my blades turning sharp enough to slice her bat in half. I elbowed her in the stomach and took the chance to roll over to a new spot. The closest I can get to hiding is continuously moving, staying in one place meant getting hoarded.
Mikey grumbled nearby, his nunchucks spinning in his hands. “Man, they’re too much! We gotta go! Leo?”
“A bit busy!” Busy was right, he’s cutting down a good number of the plastic pains with his katanas. There’s no good opportunity to use them as an escape portal, let alone any safe ones.
Beep! Beep!
Donnie raised his gauntlet up and flashed what I assume to be the building’s security cameras he hacked into. “Oh, no, no, no, guys! They’re sending actual human officers up now! What do we do!?”
Everyone’s panicked, shit’s fucked to the brim, and the constant beeps and shrieks are only making it harder to think! Kendra’s yelling about her bat, Mikey’s chosen to deal with the Purple Disasters while they’re bickering away, Raph’s boxing the claws and shielding Donnie, who’s frantically typing at his wristwatch to hack the security, and Leo’s… Screaming and getting flung. Sweet, we’ve matched now.
I ran over to Leo, guarding him from the arms trying to take advantage of the situation. “So, how’d you like your first flight?”
“I’d prefer it more if I was actually expecting it.” He got up almost as fast as he crashed down, not wasting a single second to getting back in the fight. “Ugh, I gotta get us out of here, but I need an opening!”
“Want me to try clearing something out?”
“You got any plans on how—Shit, get back!” His arm pushed me back behind him to avoid getting hit. 
The white tails of my ribbon flew forward, slightly blocking my vision. I looked straight ahead, past the death machines and battle-ground chaos, and saw the glass windows showcasing the brightly-lit city night.
The ribbon…
…Bingo.
“I actually might.” I tugged at the silk tails and felt my hair flow down as it got undone. “Just trust me and get everyone out at the first opportunity you get!”
“Wait, what are you—”
I dashed past him before he could ask any questions, no real time for them now. My multitasking skills were given the ultimate test as I focused on darting across the room, intentionally getting the arms to gather and chase after me, while tying the ribbon to the handles of my sickles and connecting them together. 
In the corner of my eye, I saw Mikey had managed to take out Kendra and her sidekicks. Don’t even gotta worry about them now, it’s going better than I thought! There was pounding at the door. Seems Donnie locked the officers out for now, but I doubt it’ll be long till they find a way to break in by force. Gotta move fast. This plan could fail horrifically, but it’s the best shot we’ve got!
With all the security arms focused on me now, the boys had a clear opening to leave. I sprinted to the windows, wound back my sickles, and broke the glass with a single throw. 
Now or never!
“HOT SOUP!!!” 
And out the window I went.
The air felt amazing, rushing by my skin as I let gravity take over the fall. I turned myself over, now looking up at the sky. The arms were shooting out the windows, unable to reach down any further to get me. A flash of blue from the inside indicated everyone was out safely. That’s my cue to prevent myself from dying now!
I held onto one of my sickles and swung the other one up. My spine tingled as a pink aura washed over my hand and over the sickle that I grabbed, trailing its way up the white silk ribbon…
Transforming it to chains!?
The pure white mystic chain clanked as it stretched out. The sickle I threw up now broke through the glass side of the building and continued shattering through it straight down. A few broken shards chipped at me as I snapped back to reality and remembered the original plan. I closed my eyes and refocused on the sickles. No thoughts, no distractions, no room for any of them. I have to breathe. I have to focus. 
The blades morphed them into a stiff rubber. Too soft to break the glass, too strong to break itself in half, effectively yanking me to a stop. 
I did it.
I actually fucking did it!
“Holy truffle mac and cheese, that was awesome!”
“I know!” I excitedly greeted Donnie who had flown over using his jet pack. “I can’t believe it went so well! You saw it all?”
“And recorded!” He turned his back towards me and pointed at his shell. “Need a ride?” 
“Definitely.” 
We cruised across the sky onto the roof of a nearby building where the rest of the guys were. The instant I hopped off Donnie’s shell, Leo jumped me with a hug, followed by several frantic checks to make sure all limbs were intact.
“Are you okay? Are you hurt? Are you dizzy? What’s wrong with you? You’re crazy! You’re crazy, you know that!?”
“Now who’s smothering them?” Mikey snickered at Leo, who looked relieved and on the verge of tears at the same time. 
“Everyone shut up and look at this video first! You’ll probably forget whatever meaningless chitchat you were having, anyway!” Donnie hissed from glee, using his extra mechanical limbs to huddle us all around his phone that was playing the video of me from a few moments ago. 
Looking at the footage now, it seemed the pink aura actually came from my whole body. It spread throughout my arms and circled past my hands, flowing to the white ribbon and replacing them with shimmering, white chains. 
Mikey screamed from excitement, holding onto my hands. “MYSTIC CHAINS! Omigosh, we match now! We’re like twins!” 
“I know! Isn’t it great!? We can be chain buddies—Eh, nevermind, that doesn’t sound right.” 
We sat around for a while so Leo could help with all the cuts and microscopic bits of glass stuck to me. In the meantime, they were all curious how the chains even came to be, which I sadly didn’t have a clear answer for. I went ahead and reassured them my plan would’ve still worked with the ribbon itself, though. Speaking of, I can’t really get my ribbon back now. Sorry, Mi. However, I did figure out how to make the chains vanish and re-materialize, so at least I don’t have to learn a different fighting style! 
Donnie was paying attention, I think. Just multitasking with a few holographic monitors up. He sighed and put ‘em away after a while.
“Yeah, no, sorry guys. Maybe my brain’s too fuzzy but I can’t hack into the actual database tonight.”
“No big deal, Don. Ya done enough.” Raph gave him a comforting pat on the shoulder. “Hey, you guys wanna go grab some pizza? Raph could use a break.”
“Yeah, I think we all could.” Hopeful, green eyes faced towards me. “Salena? It’s late but… You wanna join us for a bit?”
It’s around 3am now. If I went home now, I’d only get three hours of sleep and that’s assuming I’ll conk out immediately. It’s not impossible, though, I can feel the energy crash creeping up from all the adrenaline. But, I don’t know. I don’t wanna go yet. 
“I’m already out, aren’t I? Might as well!” 
Turns out, for once tonight, I made the right choice. It was fun getting to be with them in a more casual manner. Just chilling at a park, enjoying some pizza, and re-energizing myself as I watched them goof around. I checked through my phone while I enjoyed the delicious cheesy glory.
Everything seemed normal.
Except for one tiny issue.
I was putting it off but Zane sent a voice note to me a few hours ago. I don’t have earbuds but everyone’s pretty distracted right now, anyway. I could listen to it. Maybe it’s… Maybe it’s better than I think it is. 
I lowered the volume just to have it barely audible and clicked play.
“Hey. Um… I hope you’re home and safe now. I…” He sighed and went silent for a while. 
“This wasn’t how I intended tonight to be. It was such a gorgeous night. The weather was perfect. Everything was perfect. It was all going so well. What happened? Why do we always end up like this?”
I wish I knew. Or that he knew. Maybe we could’ve helped each other if just one of us knew what was the problem.
“Everything in my life always goes so wrong. I’m so tired of it, Salena. You’re the only thing I haven’t messed up. I don’t want to mess this up. I just—” I could hear a creek from the door opening as someone came in the room. “Yeah, it’s on the floor, clean it up. I don’t know how, just go clean it!”
Sounds of glass being swept up filled the background atmosphere. Zane sighed again. “Sorry. One of my vases broke tonight. The cherry on top, right? Anyway, uh… I’ll just end it here. I hope you’re okay. I hope you’re dreaming of something nice. And I’m… I’m sorry.”
The voice note ended. It wasn’t that bad, I guess. I feel a little bad about earlier but I’m glad he apologized. I guess things are fine now. I should probably leave a text, it’d be wrong to hold a grudge if the situation’s already resolved. 
You: hey i’m safe yea. I just wanna say i’m sorry too for lashing out like that earlier. I hope you’re sleeping well, sweet dreams and see ya tomorrow <3
There we go. Nothing to worry about now. Nothing to stress over.
A hand tapped at my shoulder. I raised my head to meet Mikey smiling down at me. “Mind if I sit? They’re bein’ a little loco even for my taste right now.”
I looked straight and saw Leo and Donnie arguing over whether pineapple belongs on pizza and Raph taking the opportunity to sneakily eat their slices. Pretty tame behavior from them, but Mikey’s tone was too lighthearted to be serious, anyway. 
I shifted over on the bench and patted the empty space next to me. He sat down and brought his knees to his chest, his back leaning against my side. He shuffled with his phone for a bit before offering me one of his earbuds. “Wanna listen to Fall Out Boy with me?”
“Sure!” 
I could use some music after tonight.
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Next Chapter
This chapter was nearly 15K words btw-
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Note
Can you do more headcanons about the Quaritch-Socorro family if Paz was alive? ☺️
I definitely can! I actually wrote these months ago I just never posted them so I hope you enjoy!
Part 1, Part 2, Part3, Part 4
The summer before Spider started the fourth grade a new house started getting built just down the road from there’s
The kids were all excited. Their parents had built their house in an empty stretch of land fifteen minutes outside of town so they had never had neighbors before.
Miles and Paz on the other hand were not excited. They built their house in seclusion for a reason dammit!
Almost every morning Spider would find his parents standing on the front porch, sipping their morning coffee, seething as they watched the construction works, and speculating about their future neighbors.
“They're building a lot of rooms. I sure hope it’s a big family moving in”
Miles scowled, “why the hell would you want that?”
Paz looked at him like he was a moron “ah so our kids can have some friends.”
Miles waved her off, “they’ve got each other don’t they” Paz rolled her eyes so hard it was a surprise they didn’t pop out of her head
“Is that a wheelchair ramp they’re building?”
“Must be old.”
Paz smirked, “You're not so young yourself.”
“Hey!”
Also that summer Spider’s parents signed him up for sports.
Not because his parents are sports people or are hoping Spider gets a sports scholarship one day
It’s because even with the fucking obstacle course in the backyard there kid just has too much energy
Through trial and error they land on soccer being the sport for Spider.
Spider has fun. He likes his teammates, and he’s good at the game.
Miles gets into it.
He went from not giving a shit about soccer to being that obnoxious sports dad yelling directions on the sidelines and getting into screaming matches with parents on the opposite team.
Meanwhile it’s 8 am on a Saturday, Paz is there sitting on a lawn chair with her sunglasses on, nursing her daughter on one boob, cheap concession stand nachos balanced on the other, her younger sons playing around her, and it’s her husband that’s exhausting and embarrassing her.
And then Miles gets a rival
An equally obnoxious soccer mom has gotten into some serious screaming matches with Miles
Like so bad the referee has almost kicked them out multiple times
From the look of embarrassment of two boys on the opposite team Paz figures those are her sons.
Paz gets so fed up with her husband that when Spider is scheduled to play that particular team again, she sneaks a megaphone in with her.
When Miles and that mom inevitably gets into a screaming match so bad the ref pauses the game, Paz breaks it out and yells “will all obnoxious sports parents please SIT DOWN!”
The mom is stunned for a second while Miles just looks back seething.
“Especially if you’re my husband and you don’t want a divorce!”
Spider is laughing his ass off as his father takes his seat red faced and grumbling to himself
Another laugh can be heard from across the field as the mom rejoins her husband and daughter.
Paz watches them for a second, taking her sunglasses off and squinting to make sure she’s really seeing who she thinks she’s seeing
Then into the megaphone “is that Jake Sully!”
The man in the wheelchair looks up, recognition dawning on his face, “Paz Socorro!”
“Holy shit man! We haven’t seen you since you could walk!”
The Sully family had moved into town after relocating from Neytiri’s homeland.
And yes they were going to be the Quaritch-Socorro household’s new neighbors.
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doyouevenshipbr0 · 2 months
Text
i just finished live action avatar the last airbender. buckle up. obv spoilers incoming.
~
honestly just gonna list the good and the bad and give a number rating at the end. this will be long. also THIS IS JUST MY OPINION!!!! nothing i say is right or wrong. dont hurt me.
the good
sokka (ik this is controversial bc of his actor okokokok im js purely from a performance standpoint he ate)
zuko (absolutely devoured)
fight scenes!!!! obv not as good as the animated (we knew this) but i still enjoyed
zhao!!!!!! do not sleep on him he killed this!!
KIYOSHI!!! ARE U KIDDINGGG
overall loved the focus on avatars other than roku
suki/suki and sokka
attack on the air nomads… ik it was unnecessary and a little hard to watch but still was v interesting
azulaaaaa and the fact that we see her this season. LOVE this addition. also the way they added her was veryyyyy well done. didnt feel forced.
bumi/how they handled the bumi arc in general. some parts i actually like better than the og. like how aang knew he was bumi right away. makes way more sense to me.
sokka and katara has some very sweet and genuine moments
aang and gyatso reunion awwww
omg. the “twist” with the 41st division that zuko accidentally saved becoming his crew. the bestttttt change that they made. i loved this. something so small but felt SO impactful.
yue/sokka and yue. this is a BIG one bc i think the original show really lacks with how they wrote yue and especially her relationship with sokka. i think it was a lot better here.
when zhao admits at the end he was working w azula and that ozai was just using zuko to motivate azula. omg. that was such a cool thing they added
and now. the bad.
aang. JDHSKSJDJ SORRYYYY dont care! he got better as the show went on. overall acting wasnt great and the writing for him definitely did not help
katara OOPSIES HEHEHE sorry but again same thing. kind of a dull performance. where is her PASSION?!?! wanted to like her so bad bc katara is my girl and this girl was giving katara on paper but the performance was just kinda bleh. didnt hate but DEFINITELY did not love.
costumes. dying on this hill i do not care. it was giving spirit of halloween. and some of these wigs…. yue’s wig? azula’s fuck ass pieces hanging out? HOW MAI AND TY LEE LOOKED IN GENERAL?! ouch
^in general mai and ty lee did not need to be here at ALLLLL. def shouldve waited till s2 for their appearances.
where is the silliness? where is the humor? hardly tried to embody the fun spirit of the original and when it did it failed miserably.
gran gran saying the thing. that’s katara’s thing.
too much exposition dumping.
first ep was by far the worst imo. how sokka and katara came across/met aang? WOW what a let down holy shit.
they should’ve kept it as aang running away from the southern air temple. not that he went for a late night drive with appa. dont care that this is a small thing. it is a HUGE part of aang’s character.
idk how to word this one and i think ppl would disagree anyways. but they are making iroh too obviously “good”. ykw i mean? when we first meet him, we know he’s not like the rest of the fire nation but we still don’t truly know where his morals lie. this show made it too obvious too soon.
why did katara never train w pakku?? that makes 0 sense. i understand she was mostly self taught throughout s1. but the whole thing was that: yes, katara was good before pakku, but when she finally did get a master, she became EXPONENTIALLY better and really came into her own. i am not buying that she becomes the master katara we know and love without learning from pakku. so unrealistic. when zuko says “u found a master” and she said “yes ur looking at her”. oh girlboss feminism u are going to HELL!
would like to take a moment to say^^^ i am a feminist ok. do nottttt get it twisted. but girlboss feminism is brainrot.
aang. did not bend. a single drop of water. are u fucking KIDDING ME? that was nuts.
really felt like if u did not watch the original series, this show would feel SO all over the place and u would have so many “wtf is happening” moments. the whole omashu shit was kind offfffff a mess. i see where they were going and why they were doing that but in hindsight after the fact i was like… if i knew nothing ab this show that would have been the most confusing clusterfuck.
and i think my biggest/most general complaint that i already talked about that i will briefly touch on: trying to do too much. why are we putting in characters and plot points that do not come till seasons 2-3 and are completely unnecessary now (secret tunnel, wan shi tong, swamp-kinda episode, etc.)
final thoughts?
it was enjoyable. i cannot deny that. landscapes were gorgeous. fights were well choreographed and looked GOOD. some changes were genuinely made for the better, and even changes that i do not necessarily think were better, i could respect the creativity of some changes and understood why they were there. but overall, as most live action remakes go, this was a flat portrayal of one of the greatest pieces of fiction of all time that suffered from some overly ambitious ideas and dull writing with little to no sense of whimsy. while some performances exceeded expectations, others that were crucial to the integrity of this show really disappointed me.
overall: 6.6/10. this number is completely subject to change.
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