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wandagcre · 5 months

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SAM & HER GF & COREFOUR IN CHRISTMAS HEADCANONS PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!

christmas with the core four as sam's girlfriend 🎄

Note: this had become a christmas special writing hhh i hope you like it nonetheless <3

whether you have a tradition or not during christmas time, you'll certainly have a lively extension of a family now that you're sam's girlfriend!

you ask sam what you should prepare and she simply says "your presence is much needed of course, then some clothes and finally, hope for the best for the sake of your sanity"

you chuckle at sam's words. it was between a lighthearted joke and reality. the 3/4 of the gang is full of expressive and loud personalities but you already met them and hung out, so you know you're in for a (good) ride 🫶🏼

but thankfully, you're already welcomed so you thought your previous worries were silly. chad goes for a special handshake, then mindy and tara for a warm hug and how are you's <3 it was genuine too

sam is already smiling at the sight of you as she puts your bags away, how you're getting along with them in christmas style. she has known the twins for so long and was ecstatic to finally continue celebrating it with her sister, and now with someone special — you.

after settling in, you're surprised that they actually cooked? not because of their skills but them combined is a hazard and their brain cells cancelling out each other. sam chimed in soon as she caught the conversation, "hey what does that say about me then! >:( i instructed them carefully when they started cooking,"

rest of the gang laughed, took no offense to your assumption. they said that you were absolutely right. in fact, tara reveals she almost did the classic switch up - salt over sugar - all because she got immersed at their in between conversations to which you join laughing at.

it's so diverse! full of everyone's favorite dishes at christmas time instead of the traditionally expected dishes. you told them that this was such a good idea and made things even more heartwarming to celebrate. they smile and chad rubs your back, "of course. we're our own little family. we do it according to our favorite picks and sharing it... in a way feels like you're sharing love, too. it makes it even more special." mindy butts in, "not bad, brother."

tara agrees and says chad definitely has his moments.

then! from your back, apparently sam sneaked in and smoothly glides another dish - your own favorite! she looks anywhere else except your eyes, "you didn't know the theme and you deserve a slot in this tradition," she murmured and tara adds, "so that's what you've been burning your hands for?" your eyes well up in affection. you press a chaste kiss to which the gang gagged at 😭

"no mistletoe for you two!" - they reprimanded you

trying eggnogs in discreet - perpetuated by the twins, specifically by chad (unknowingly made them after mindy said "go wild, surprise me") and immediately regretted her words. after things cooled down (re: woodsboro and new york mess) they decided to bring it up, the carpenter sisters weren't safe and so were you!

sam looking at the sidelines, suspiciously smiling and seemingly anticipating. you took more than a sip unknowingly, then soon as it hit your tastebuds, your face was contorted in disgust. the women started laughing. chad says "don't hate the brits!"

sam says in your defense, "you know they eat baked beans with dry sausages and bread right?" tara agrees with ease, saying that's a fair point and flips off the twins for the same surprise they did last year. adding to the chaos, you firmly say, "yeah! it offended my tastebuds. i thought this was a christmas tradition not a frat initiation!"

the core four loved your response 😭 sam included, was laughing hard and gasping for air. it was witty and the twins playfully retort that it was extreme of you to accuse!

sam couldn't stop smiling and laughing oh my god somebody help her facial muscles! it's permanently stitched to her at this point

mindy loves the banter. she nudges you and says that sam is partially getting her lick back. but mainly it was in your honor, to which she gags at because you guys are subtly so sweet already 🥹

they introduce you to some clichés, but with a twist! gingerbread house making but five of you will pick names, not revealing them and within an hour u should dedicate it to them. they're all wonky creations but decent. sam can't do much to control it anyway as they try to sabotage everyone, including yours 😭 the clean up will be tedious for sure!

you're surprised that tara decorated yours in your favorite color and how she noticed since it wasn't that obvious and yet she noticed a pattern apparently, it shows with your stuff and clothing! i think hers are perfected, standard-like creation and you see her stickman drawing attempt of two persons - apparently it's you and sam

sam points at it, "is that us? why am i smaller?" and tara grumbles. "this is for your girlfriend can you leave my masterpiece alone?"

you agree with tara who grinned widely at your approval, "be nice. i think it's an adorable touch to this homey gingerbread house!"

mindy adds knowingly, "also, sam, i hate to break it to you but you're an absolute puddle of baby around your girlfriend, that's why you're smaller - duh. your real height is not equivalent to your height there." and tara spreads her arms, exclaiming 'exactly!'

chad looks back and forth, trying to grasp the context. "oh! oh! i get it," he clasps his hands rather loudly. "you're so right for that. and you let her call you sammy?"

you giggle at sam's petulant pout at the teasing but she doesn't deny anything. "whatever," she grumbles and when you wanted to appease it with a kiss as you lean in to sam, the 3/4 are already making gagging and vomiting sounds 😭✋🏼

watching movies based on your favorite christmas themed movies! (insert an obscure movie u randomly hyperfixated or a popular one from your country) usually it was a matter of rock paper and scissors for fairness, but since you're new they gave you a special pass and played your choice of movie <3

your pick was new to them. therefore they were entranced at the plot and you enjoy the commentary and how they analyzed it, like little kids during the movie time in class. you look to your side and see that sam's eyebrows were bunched and she ate in sloth-like manner 😭

baby was so focused! it was funny how she looked like that while her arm is hooked around yours and leaned to you comfortably. sam says i can see why this is appealing to you... it's so you and unique and it matched your energy and she happily rambles - much to 3/4's surprise

not because sam is silently attentive but it's their first time to see her so open and carefree with her partner and so they have this faint, knowing smiles on their faces. they're happy that sam finally have found her person that she feels comfortable and honest with🥺

as you go to your respective rooms (obviously you're rooming with sam) mindy shouts from the hall, "please be respectful and let's keep the jolly, wholesome spirit alive! we do not need anymore virgo babies,"

tara visibly wanted to vomit and covered her ears. chad looks at his twin confused, "since when do you have beef with virgos?"

meanwhile you and sam were stuck in chuckling and was flustered. "i didn't even think of that!" you shout back to mindy who replies with sure, jan. as you and sam settle in her room, you take her hand and swung them gently, your gaze intent on sam's brown ones. "thank you for having me. i felt so loved." both of your hearts felt so full. your silly smile is unerasable and so is sam's, you find it endearing how the two of you probably look like fools together.

and sam pouts cutely at your words. "no, thank you baby for being here. it's only a first of many more to come." she retrieved something - a mistletoe - on her pocket. sam placed it above you two, and you smirk at her sly action. "let's seal it with a kiss then?" you say to which sam eagerly responds to and met your lips with no hesitation.

#headcanons #sam carpenter imagine #sam carpenter x fem reader #sam carpenter x reader #scream christmas #sam carpenter x y/n #sam carpenter x you #sam carpenter x female reader #requested

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lover-of-skellies · 7 months

Text

Mutt: I need to ask you a question

Stretch: Shoot

Mutt: Shoot at what?

Stretch, sleep-deprived, interpreting that as Mutt's question: Uh. I guess maybe that vase?

[Later]

Papyrus: ...WHAT HAPPENED TO THE VASE THAT WAS HERE?

Sans: Stretch and Mutt's brain cells canceled each other out

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bad-and-drawn-that-way · 2 months

Text

Electric Love - Full Chapters

Want early chapters? Read on Ao3!

Chapter 1: Not What I Expected

Notes: Support me by reading on Ao3! Kudos and comments help motivate me to see multi-chapter fics through to the end! I'll be posting announcements for the updates here. Chapters will come out on Ao3 BEFORE tumblr.

Some shit in this will probably be really OOC, but it's fanfiction so who cares? Enjoy!

Word Count: 6090

It was a day in hell like any other. Flashing cameras, idiots who came to Vox with questions below his caliber, the whole works. The overlord was half tempted to cancel any appointments he had after the current debut he was waiting to go on stage for. The only thing he wanted was to go home and eat an obscene amount of junk food while he zoned out to reruns of one of the shitty soap operas that ran on one of his channels.

He could hear the crowd of anxious paparazzi and ass-kissers just past the stage as he pocketed his phone with a deep sigh. Ignoring the concerned crewman who signaled it was time for him to go on stage, Vox grit his teeth and stepped onto the stage, immediately adopting an entirely different persona with a practiced smile.

Cameras flashed and the crowd got louder as people cheered, shoved each other out of the way and paparazzi rapidly fired questions at him with microphones pointed his way. Vox resisted the urge to roll his eyes. You’d think that any experienced reporter with half a brain cell would know the chances of getting a response to such behavior was zero to none, and yet he was so familiar with the approach that it was boring.

Despite his disdain, Vox waved and grinned proudly as he stepped up to a podium in front of a large screen. "Hello my loyal audience and fans,” he speaks with a clear and confident tone. “Today we at VoxTech have quite the exciting announcement to make. For too long, we have been limited to regular television and radio media, well no more! Introducing VoxTube, the new innovative way to stream content and enjoy it at any time.." the crowd cheered and whistled louder at the sound of the word 'streaming' and then they all gasped at once during the reveal.

Vox paused to dramatically look away from the crowd for a moment, his eyebrows arching and the corner of his mouth curling up slightly, before looking back towards the crowd again with a smug grin on his face. "And now.. for the moment you've all been waiting for... the grand reveal!" Vox said as the crowd grew even louder with excitement.

Just as the screen behind him shifted to reveal the new platform, the screen flickered before showing a logo that was very much not his. In fact, it was the logo of the damned rival company that had been a thorn in his side for the past few months. “Oh for fucks, sake, not this again,” he muttered as he looked to the side to see his production crew scrambling behind the scenes to shut down the takeover.

The large screen was supposed to be demoing the “new” platform that was really just a rehashed regurgitation of an older platform. This was supposed to be just a quick cash grab, but now it was just a problem. Vox glared at the stupid halo logo as an unfamiliar, but jovial voice seeped through his speakers like a virus.

"Tired of being controlled? Tired of not being about to tell if your information is being leaked or if VoxTech is brainwashing you?" The voice asked as it revealed distasteful footage of mindless sinners in front of VoxTech products. "Then try Eternal Entertainment. Your anti-Vox streaming and video platform, completely free of VoxTech networks. Take back control of your experience!"

The crowd was silent as the screen played a jingle before going dark. It took all the self-restraint Vox had not to glitch out on the stage when he knew the cameras were still rolling. Immediately, the crowd had their phones out, downloading the new app. Reporter cameras were flashing as sinners got as close to the stage as they could. Microphones were shoved in Vox's direction as a dozen voices asked him about the new competition.

"Ah-ah-ah... Now, let's not be so hasty, hmm?” Vox turned to the crowd with a strained grin. “This so-called 'Eternal Entertainment' is merely slander propaganda! There’s no history, nor a face to the name of this company. There’s nothing to trust! At VoxTech, we care about users' safety and provide hell-wide coverage that this ‘competition’ simply can’t beat." Vox said, trying to convince the crowd that it was a mistake to download the rival platform.

"What about the rumors of Vox programs being coded with hypnotic influence?” A reporter asked as they shoved down another. “This new rival platform promises protection from the threat of corporate dating mining and influence. What do you have to say about that?" A reporter asked.

"Hypnosis? No no, no.. that’s ridiculous!" Vox scoffed, shaking his head as he tried to sound convincing. "It’s already been proven that any rumors about such malware were nothing more than scandalous lies created to discriminate against the powers of tech demons like myself,” Vox said, theatrically shaking his head as he played the card his PR team had him prepared for at all times.

“Look, you know you can trust and rely on the wonderful VoxTech. We have been nothing but honest and transparent... unlike those frauds at 'Eternal... uhh..'," Vox tried to remember the name of the rival platform.

"Eternal Entertainment!" Someone from the crowd yelled. "It already has 300,000 downloads!"

"See? That’s nothing!” Vox laughed with a strained smile. It was something. Low numbers for a platform overall, sure. But to already have that many downloads mere minutes after the hijacked debut? Yeah no, Vox was freaking the fuck out.

The crowd continued to get louder, and Vox felt anxious electricity thrumming through his veins. Everything was getting overwhelming and he only had so much bullshit he could come up with on the spot before he started contradicting himself. He continued to smile as his magic pulsed through the nearby cables of the stage as he searched for anything he could use as an escape. He found a security camera in an alleyway a few blocks over and put on a professional grin. He just needed a closing statement, and he'd get out of there. Easy.

"Well then," Vox cleared his throat and put on his best, most charismatic smile. "I promise you all, this so-called “Eternal Entertainment”, is nothing but a passing fad! It's just a desperate attempt by the competition to try and take you away from the best hell has to offer. The very best streaming and media..." Vox's eyes narrowed as he looked around at the crowd and his smile slowly faded. "Me."

The chaotic crowd suddenly fell silent as his screen flooded their vision with red and black spirals. The sound of a pin dropping would be deafening compared to the frantic clamoring that had filled the space only moments ago as Vox flooded the crowd’s minds with VoxTech propaganda and affirmations. Once he was content, Vox used the camera to teleport to the alleyway while the crowd was left temporarily mindless.

“F̸̛̫̝̉u̴͑͜c̵̮̀ḱ̷̩̆î̴̩͘n̴̯̬͐g̷̮͌̚ piece of shit m̷̨͙͗o̴̲͎͐t̸͉̜͒h̷̙̃e̶͎̦͋r̵̟͘f̷̱̄͒û̸̥ć̵̙ͅḱ̶̡́ę̷͎̄ŕ̵̠̳ś̶̝͗,” Vox swore as his screen glitched hard the moment he was out of sight. He continued to swear and vent out his frustrations as he kicked an empty paint can on the ground next to a dumpster. Fortunately, there weren’t any sinners passing by to witness his tantrum. He wasn’t in the mood to drop another fucker until they were brain-dead.

Once Vox got the rest of his frustrations out of his system, he collected himself and sighed. He pulled out his phone and opened the app store, cringing as he saw the rival app rising in the trending downloads. He closed his eyes and focused his abilities as his power surged through the network and hunted down the source engine running the app. With so many devices accessing the network, he was able to narrow down the location quickly.

"Perfect,” Vox said with a sinister grin. “Now to take care of this problem once and for all."

Any time he’d tried to hunt down Eternal before, Vox had run into dead end after dead end. He couldn’t track down the sinners running the rival software, nor could he track down any of their host servers. The hubris of his newfound enemy would be their undoing. Anyone in the entertainment industry worth their salt knew how easily things could be exposed upon release. By loudly announcing their debut when they hijacked Vox’s presentation, the company had left themselves wide open for him to latch onto the smallest flaws and hunt them down properly.

Vox wanted to destroy the place and make sure that their platform never gained any kind of popularity or power in Hell ever again. He finally pinpointed the location where the platform was being hosted and was pleased to find it wasn't anything impressive. There was no polish. The building didn’t even look like it was any sort of office or official business. If anything, it looked uninhabited. He pulled up the address on his screen to see what he could find out about the location’s history.

The building was a rundown observatory run by some random sinner he couldn’t care less about before one of the biggest exterminations of the past century. The neighborhood the building was near had been so thoroughly gutted by the angels that the entire area was abandoned due to superstition. Well… as abandoned as any corner of the overcrowded ring of hell could be. It was the perfect place for unsavory types to hide in the shadows.

Vox scanned the exterior and his smirk only grew as he took note of the lack of any sort of security. "This will be easy..." Vox said to himself as he locked on to a computer screen he sensed inside of the building. Wanting to get the drop on his cocky competition, he teleported his way inside the old, abandoned observatory. Vox was expecting a potential fight. Maybe guns. Probably a lab full of desk jockeys. What Vox didn’t expect was for his feet to barely touch the ground before he found himself suddenly in agonizing pain. His vision was clouded over with purple smoke and he heard the sound of glass shattering as his entire body short-circuited hard from the overwhelming pain.

Vox screamed, dropping to his knees as his systems malfunctioned from the icy-hot burning sensation shooting across his skin. His face bluescreened and his vision went dark. The last thing he heard as he lost consciousness was the sound of someone swearing and footsteps rapidly approaching him as he passed out.

----

Vox gasped as he felt his systems finally reboot. He ran an internal diagnostic as he sat up to look around, dazed and disoriented. The burning sensation had faded, but his head was pounding. His vision slowly cleared as he took in his surroundings. It looked like he was in some sort of office.There was a large, overflowing bookshelf by an open window and a desk with an impressive computer set-up on it. Vials filled with purple, sparkling mist were scattered around the entire room, all with different labels on them. The space was messy, yet somehow… cozy. At least, it felt more comfortable than the majority of the sleek areas of hell he was more familiar with.

Vox looked down and quirky an eyebrow as he held up the soft blanket draped over his lap. He tried not to think of what sort of diseases could be lurking in the old couch he was lying on as he processed the situation.

"W... what..? Where am I… How did I get here...?" Vox said as he blinked a couple of times, trying to remember what had happened before he lost consciousness. "What the fuck is this place?"

"Oh shit, you're awake!" A voice startled Vox and he tossed the blanket off of him as the door to the office pushed open. He hadn’t noticed that it had been cracked open, nor had he noticed you waiting for him to wake up out in the hallway.You’d been leaning against the doorframe and scrolling through social media as you waited for him to regain consciousness.

You stepped into the room, smiling sheepishly as you pocketed your phone, “Sorry, I didn’t want you to wake up alone and be confused, but it also felt weird to just sit in here. How are you feeling?”

Vox didn't know what to expect when it came to his new rival, but he couldn't have imagined you. Hell was full of sinners of all shapes and sizes. Vox had seen some crazy shit, but he’d never seen someone as… soft as you. You weren’t dressed to the nines or in some wild costume like most. Instead, you were just wearing sweatpants and an oversized hoodie with your hair pulled back in a messy bun. You looked like a burnt-out college student rather than a sinner trapped in hell.

“You know,” you smirk. “I may not have been the one running the campaign against you, but you may have wanted to take that whole anti-Vox thing a bit more seriously before just barging in here.”

"You're... the owner of the rival platform..?" Vox said as his eyebrows furrowed.

"Yes and no," you cringe. "Normally, I’d be chasing you out of here with a broomstick, but I might have royally fucked up and have no idea what I’m doing," you admit.

“What?” Vox asked flatly. He had been expecting tech bro assholes who would monologue at him in an attempt to piss him off. He’d been expecting the run-of-the-mill hellish power-hungry welcome he’d come to love tearing to shreds any time someone was stupid enough to try to overthrow him. He expected literally anything else but this.

“It… would probably be easier to just show you,” You sigh as you walk over to your computer and wake up the idle screen.

Vox stood from the couch and crossed the small office to look at the screen. It revealed that millions of sinners had already made accounts on Eternal Entertainment’s new platform, and a decent amount of accounts had already started uploading content. To say it was successful would be an understatement.

"Millions..." Vox muttered under his breath, feeling more and more threatened by the platform as he saw the success it was already having. "How the hell did you manage to pull this off?"

You chuckle, rubbing the back of your head nervously. "Yeah, uh, about that... I don't... know."

"You don't k̴n̷o̵w̵?̴" Vox flipped on you with a spark. His eye twitched as he tried to pick apart your game. Were you bragging? Were you about to threaten him? Were you a fucking idiot?

"Excuse, the fuck, me?” Vox growled as he grabbed your hoodie and pulled you forward. “Do you mean to tell me this was just some fucking pet project or some shit?"

"Yes and no?," you cringed as Vox made it clear how fed up he was getting with that answer.

Normally, you wouldn’t let anyone yank you around, but you’d dug yourself into some pretty deep shit. The guilt that came with that kept you complicit for the time being, but you still pushed his hand off of you.

"The truth is, I… made the platform,” you admit sheepishly. You’re quick to defend yourself as you see Vox’s expression fill with rage. “But I’m not the one who released it and I don’t work for Eternal. I swear!”

“You realize how fucking fake that sounds, right?” Vox growled as he felt his claws itch with the desire to rip you apart.

“Yup,” you swallow. “I understand the shit sandwich I landed myself in very much, Mr. Big Scary Evil Overlord Sir.”

“But,” you say as you pull back your desk chair and pull up your browser. “I have proof. If you don’t believe me after you look at it, you can kick my ass to your heart’s content. But I think you’ll quickly realize I do not know what the fuck I’m doing and I couldn’t have made this shit the way you’re thinking I did, even if I tried.”

Vox squinted at you with distrust as he looked between you and the chair. He grabbed the back of the offending furniture far tighter than was necessary and yanked it out of your hand as he sat down with a grumble.

He started scrolling through the history of your browser and clicked through the tabs you’d left open for him. It looked like you had signed up for some sort of coding workshop and had no idea what you had signed up for. What was poorly disguised as a hands-on tutorial for beginner video game coders to learn how to make mock platforms for marketing was a trap to lure in people to do Eternal’s dirty work. It was the sort of thing that would never pop up on Vox’s radar. It was obviously a scam to the trained eye and a weak attempt at throwing suckers like you under the bus.

“You’ve got to be fucking joking,” he said as he looked up at you incredulously.

Your face flushed and you looked away from him with an embarrassed frown as you crossed your arms. “Oh fuck off,” you grumble. “I’m broke as hell and it was a free course in an area I need to learn to make my games. It sounded too good to be true.”

“Because it was, dumbass,” Vox snorted as he shook his head and kept digging. He followed the data trail of the domain the workshop was hosted on and pulled up a few unrelated tabs that you hadn’t already pulled up from him so he could figure out how you’d discovered the suspicious content in the first place.

“Hey!” you gasp as you try to stop him.

“If you don’t want to end up an electrified shish kabob on the floor, you’ll let me work,” Vox said, not taking his eyes off the screen for a second as he installed some of his searching software to run in the background of your system.

You huff, watching him continue to dig through your computer before you turn on your heel and walk out. “Just don’t move or delete anything.”

Vox rolled his eyes as he continued his search. He quickly understood where your worries stemmed from. He hadn’t paid too much attention to your mention of it earlier, but it was obvious you were some sort of video game developer. There were folders filled with concept designs, dialogue chains, and amateur attempts at programming. It seemed while you thrived in the creator side of things, your tech knowledge was severely lacking. A quick invasive peek at your bank account showed that your funds were as well. You had big visions for someone with only yourself as a resource.

He paused as he opened a folder in your files that was filled with what appeared to be pictures of you and what he assumed were your friends. His eyes widened as he recognized several faces smiling innocently compared to the lewd expressions he’d seen them make in Valentino’s films. What caught his attention even more was the multiple pictures of you with Angel Dust and his little cyclops friend who had a knack for explosives.

Before he could dig any further into your personal life, several windows popped up to let him know the diagnostics had finished running the background.

Vox’s leg started to bounce with anxious energy as the reports from the programs he’d run earlier started to flood in. He immediately followed the trail of information and found several other websites connecting to Eternal that eventually led him to a secluded forum with all sorts of shady shit. He opened several threads that related to himself and the other Vees and inhaled sharply as he started to read through everything.

"Anti-VoxTech underground network…?" Vox whispered aloud. An anxious thrum of energy ran through him as he tried not to freak out. What if this person used the platform to spread propaganda against him or to leak information from his networks? What if this person was trying to destroy him from the inside out? His paranoia began to intensify and he felt small sparks licking at his skin when suddenly, a coffee mug was thrust in front of his face.

He looks up at you as you hold out one of two mugs to him. He takes it slowly from your hand as you look at him unimpressed, yet expectantly. “Thanks…?” He says slowly as he is once again thrown off by how much you didn’t match his expectations. He looks down at the liquid in his hand before looking back up at you distrustfully. For all he knew, your weirdly casual demeanor could have all been a trick. Poisoning him in the afterlife wouldn’t kill him, it’d just be a major inconvenience. Even so, he hesitated.

“Oh for fucks sake,” you roll your eyes as you realize why he was hesitating. You stick your pinky in his cup and pop it in your mouth to show him it was safe. “It’s just hot chocolate,” you huff before you take a sip from your own mug. “I was going to make one before you just zapped your ass in here and it felt rude to only make one for myself.”

Your eyebrows furrowed as you looked the bewildered overlord over. “Shit, but your face… Can you even…? Wait no, that’s also rude. Fuck.”

Vox burst out laughing as you verbally tripped over yourself. Yeah no. There was no evil ploy here. You were just a weirdly endearing dumbass.

“I can drink,” Vox grinned as he finally lifted the cup to his lips. His eyes widened as he took in the unexpected taste. While he could eat and drink, he unfortunately had lost his sense of smell with his afterlife form. He wasn’t expecting the slightly sour tinge of raspberry syrup that mixed with the more standard flavor of the drink.

You watch him curiously and his eyes lock onto yours in an instant. Your face flushes and you turn away as you try to not-so-smoothly play over the fact that you had been trying to see how his mouth worked. “S-So, did you find anything?”

Vox sighed and set his mug down as he turned his attention back to your computer. “Yes, actually. Surprisingly enough, I’ve found more on your very shitty and outdated computer than my team has in the past six months.”

He ignores your offended protests about the quality of your setup as he looks through one of the forums. He ignores the way you lean into his personal space as you look over his shoulder and read the comments yourself.

“I just don’t get why there’s this large of an interest in working around my products,” Vox grumbled as the two of you read through the conversations.

You raise an eyebrow and peer down at him. "You and the Vee's don't exactly have the best rep with lower-class sinners. It may be hard for a big powerful dude like you to comprehend, but believe it or not, some people like their privacy."

Vox frowned as he begrudgingly sipped on his drink. He would never admit out loud how much it was soothing his nerves. “We’re in hell,” he reasoned. “Surely dating mining which pornos the average sinner watches to increase ratings and production quality isn’t the top concern these idiots have.”

You roll your eyes and sigh as you sit on the edge of your desk. Your hips carelessly pushed some things back, but you paid it no mind. “It goes deeper than that and you know it. Hell, I know it and I think this entire experience has proven how much of this shit flies over my head.”

Vox’s eyes drift to the vial you bumped with your hip and he pauses as he considers just how harmless you really were. While it was clear you weren’t the most program-savvy, Vox hadn’t forgotten the abrupt welcome he’d gotten when he tried to sneak in. Whatever that mist he’d been enveloped in was bottled and stashed all over the place. He still had more digging to do.

Sensing the shift in Vox’s attitude, your eyes follow his gaze and you cringe as you tuck the vial out of sight.

“So you’re not a complete idiot then,” Vox said as he placed his empty mug on the table and stood over you.

“That’s different,” you mutter as you shrink in on yourself and avoid looking him in the eye.

“I’m not so sure about that,” Vox hummed as his eyes sharply searched your features like a shark drawn to blood in the water.

His clawed fingers wrap around your jaw and he slowly makes you turn towards him. His grip was firm and the sharp edges threatened to break skin, but he was also somewhat gentle, after all, you had gotten him this far. A looming threat if you suddenly decided to stop cooperating.

“You deleted your visits to those forums in your browser history before you let me access your computer,” Vox said slowly as he watched your every expression carefully. You were avoiding his eyes, which meant you knew what he was capable of. “Why?”

“It doesn’t matter,” you say slowly as you try to keep your breathing even. You couldn’t afford to panic. “I probably just accidentally cleared it when I was wiping my cache or something. Aren’t you supposed to do that every now and then, or something?”

Vox quirked an eyebrow, looking completely unimpressed. “You’re not a good liar.”

“Oh fuck off,” you frown as you look up at him without thinking.

Vox grins and his eyes immediately spiral as he tries to pull you under his spell. You gasp and for a moment he thinks he has you… only for the spirals not to reflect back at him from your own eyes.

“What…?” Vox blinks as his grip on you loosens.

You smack his hand away and dive out from under him as you try to get away. Vox growls, whipping around and grabbing your arm before you can slip out of the office. You let out a startled yelp as he slams you against the wall and twists your arm behind your back.

“What the hell is going on? Who are you, really?” he interrogates as he twists your arm harder.

It didn’t make any sense. You were a walking contradiction. He genuinely didn’t sense any malice directed at him from you. Your search history barely skimmed anything relating to him. If anything, you had done more research on Velvette and Valentino, which he had to admit, in any other scenario may have bruised his ego a hair. You accidentally helped a rival company launch an attack against him and let him search your system without any hesitation, yet the second he locked in on those vials, you changed your tune completely.

Not only that, but you were somehow able to resist his hypnosis. He’d seen the faintest flash of connection in your eyes that told him you weren’t immune. Yet you had somehow managed to slip out of the hold he’d tried to cast over you within seconds.

“Let me go, asshole!” You shouted as you tried to slip out of his grasp. You hiss in pain as his sharp claws dig into your arm and draw blood.

“I don’t think so,” Vox growled as he tightened his grip and drew more blood. “What the hell is in those vials? And why were you on those forums in the first place? Tell me or I’ll rip your arm off.”

You bark out a laugh despite the fear, “With those fucking twigs? I’d like to see you tr-AH fuck! Alright alright!” You relent as he slams your head against the wall with his other hand.

Vox loosens his grip ever so slightly, but watches you like a hawk.

“Everything I’ve told you so far is true,” you start with a sigh. “I don’t know jack shit about most of your area in things, but I only found the workshop because I was on the forums.”

“And why would you be there?” Vox frowned. “You don’t have anything my company would care about on your systems. You’re a shit liar, but get any ideas of telling me it was for privacy out of your head.”

Your eyes dart and he can tell you’re trying to think of a way to weasel out of telling him the truth. Whatever it was, you really didn’t want him to know. Which meant he needed to know.

“Tell me,” Vox growled as he pressed you harder into the wall.

“V-Valentino,” you whimpered as the pain started to wear down your willpower. You weren’t exactly accustumed to this sort of experience despite your time in hell. You kept your head down as much as you could. You only dared to kick up dust for one reason and you’d done your best not to get caught for it up until now, but you had been careless.

“What?” Vox blinked as his grip relented.

“I,” you open your mouth, only to cringe. You really didn’t want to tell him, but if you double died without at least trying to pull something, it would only leave the very people you were trying to protect in deeper shit. Vox would figure it out after killing you anyways. Spilling the beans and trying to figure something out in the process was your only hope.

“The mist wasn’t mean to hurt you,” you say slowly. “I’ll talk, so fucking let go first.”

Vox watches you distrustfully, but releases your arm and steps back. He stands between you and the door, so he’s willing to play along if it means he’ll finally have the full picture.

“I don’t… pay much attention to hell’s politics,” you sigh. “I don’t care about power, I don’t care about overlords, but I do care about my friends.”

For the first time since Vox had gotten here, he saw something familiar flash in your eyes. The dark twisted bloodlust he’d seen in most sinners. “I don’t use my powers much,” you say as you walk over to your desk. “I’m not really trained to fight like most people down here. I’m cooped up in here most of the time, so it’s not like I’ve ever really had a reason to start shit.”

You pick up a vial and hold up your other hand as a small portal opens above your palm. “This is about all I can do,” you say. “I had a buddy who liked to research sinners abilities and I didn’t really care if he looked into mine.”

You had to bite down the fond smile at the memory of Baxter’s pestering. “He discovered that at low enough levels of activation, magic could be collected like a liquid or a mist with all his fancy tech shit. Again, you know how much of that flies over my head.”

Vox looked between your hands and nodded silently, watching you carefully as he waited for you to put together the pieces for him.

“Using the residue of my abilities, he tried to replicate that love potion shit you guys sell. He wanted to see if he could recreate it and then make a repellent.”

Vox’s eyes widened as he looked at the vial and it finally clicked. “It’s a repellent against Valentino’s magic.”

You wave away the miniature portal above your hand and nod with a frown. You hated every part of this, but at least he hadn’t killed you yet. “Like I said earlier, there's a high demand for slipping out under the Vee's control."

“Is that how you resisted my hypnosis as well?” Vox asked carefully.

“No,” you shake your head. “That’s something else entirely. No schemes or any fancy shit like that involved there.”

“Then why did the mist hurt me?” Vox frowned.

“Well, for starters,” you smirk at the memory. It had freaked you out pretty bad in the moment, but after the shit Vox just put you through, you kinda loved that he’d gotten his ass handed to him. “The guy I told you about was here and was trying to make a new batch. You literally teleported in the middle of us making the shit and knocked over the batch we’d been producing so it was heavily concentrated.”

“Secondly, you’re around Valentino all the time. When is that guy not blowing his slut smoke all around you?” You cross your arms.

“That…” Vox thought back to how often Valentino smoked his pipe around him. How used to seeing the pink smoke around him he’d gotten. He didn’t have a sense of smell so he was entirely immune to the effects. So much so, he had no reason to notice how it was completely seeped into his clothing and probably coating his entire body in an unnoticeable residue.

"Yup," you sigh. "If I had to take a guess, then that’s why.”

"And the reason you’d help your friend make this…” Vox trailed off as he remembered the pictures he’d found on your computer. You were friends with a lot of Valentino’s sex workers, including Angel Dust. Vox was a business partner, a friend, and sometimes a lover of Valentino. Valentino was notorious for the abuse of his sex workers. An abuser of some of your closest friends.

You frown, turning away from Vox, your body language acknowledging him as a proper enemy for the first time since he's broke in. "You get it now.”

He knew about Valentino and his history of abuse towards sex workers. He had seen his behavior first hand and knew the moth’s behavior was vile and repulsive. But the worst of it was never directed at Vox himself. Some of it, yeah, but… Vox hadn't really cared about anyone else. He had better shit to think about.

"I see…,” Vox hummed as he picked up another vial off the floor and twirled it between his claws. You really could benefit from some basic cleaning around the office. “So you’re planning on beating him at his own game." Vox said, his eyes narrowing as he looked at you with a mix of suspicion and admiration. "Clever... very clever.."

You cross your arms, watching him sharply as you wait to see what he'll do about it.

"You got the information you wanted." You say flatly. He knew who was attacking him with your software now. The Eternity shit he’d found on your computer was a solid lead. However, he now knew of your efforts against Valentino. You weren’t a fighter, by any means, but you were prepared to protect yourself if you had to.

Vox's eyes narrowed as he looked at you in a new light. Your lack of personal interest in politics and the standard hell powergrabs had him intrigued. He wondered just what you’d be capable of if you did play the same game that everyone else did. It was clear you were resourceful and crafty, yet you directed those efforts towards something so… mundane.

"You’ve proved useful enough so far, and I thank you for that. Depending on your next answer, I may even let you keep your insides where they belong. So, let me ask you this..." Vox said, continuing to look at you with his eyes narrowing. "If those experiments are unrelated to my influence entirely, then how are you able to resist my hypnosis?"

Whether he meant to or not, Vox just handed you the key to your survival on a silver platter. Your eyes widen and you try to hide the excitement at the opportunity as you level your best poker face. “It’s pretty simple actually,” you say as you inspect your nails nonchalanetly. A bit too theatric, perhaps, but you were trying to play it cool. It didn’t matter that you weren’t actually succeeding.

“Hypothetically, I may or may not have discovered how to counter your hypnosis,” you hum as Vox’s eye twitched. “Hypothetically, I could sell that information or simply just post it to the Eternal forums. I’m sure everyone would love to know how not to get sucked into your marketing schemes.”

"You want to make a deal," Vox realized, the corners of his mouth curling up slightly and dead pixels flickered to life under his lip. This just got so much more interesting for him.

#vox x reader #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel vox #electric love series

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dc-and-damirae · 11 months

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jason: I need to ask you a question

tim: Shoot

jason: Shoot at what?

tim, sleep-deprived, interpreting that as Tim question: Uh. I guess maybe that vase?

[Later]

alfred: ...What happened to the vase that was here?

damain: tim and jason brain cells canceled each other out

#batfam #batfamily #incorrect dc quotes #incorrect quotes #dc incorrect quotes #dc funny #dc comcis #dc comics #damian wayne #damian al ghul #batkids #jason todd #tim drake #red hood #red robin #agent a #alfred pennyworth #incorrect batfamily quotes

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ask-spooky-manor · 2 months

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Toby, Jeff, and Clockwork Friendship Headcanons ✨✨

- They’re childhood friends! They met as kids and were thick as thieves until both Jeff and Natalie moved away from Colorado only to find each other again in the manor.

- They are all individually smart people but when put in a room together it’s like their brain cells cancel out and they become the dumbest, most reckless people you ever meet.

- To be more specific, Toby and Natalie are like “let’s do this thing that will get us in trouble.” Jeff tries to be the responsible one only to get himself roped in as well.

- They’re all very cuddly and physically affectionate, and it had lead to people assuming they at least two of them, if not all three of them are together.

- Toby and Natalie did actually date for a bit when they were like 12, but they simply realized that they work better as friends.

- They were each other’s first kiss, and they both still look back on that one memory fondly. The light happiness knowing the first kiss was by someone who loves them. Platonic love sure, but it’s still love. That means something to both of them.

- Toby and Jeff also had an awkward period of “do I just like him as a friend or is it something more?” It did ultimately end up being platonic feelings. It was just a matter of neither of them having had a healthy connection with a peer before, so it was confusing for a while.

- Fights are rare between the three of them mainly because once they do get in one, it’s easy to break the tension. Normally because one of them says something dumb that makes the other two laugh and then all is good.

- They started a band in middle school. It was Toby’s idea and despite the other two not being all that passionate about music, they agreed for Toby’s sake. It only lasted a week, but they did get to perform at the school’s talent show at least.

- Their love language for each other is bullying. They can literally throw the nastiest insults to each other. But don’t act like you can do that same cause they will most likely beat you up for it.

- To this day, Jeff and Natalie are very protective of Toby since he was the target of some really intense bullying back in school. It’s actually the source of some of those rare conflicts as Toby has felt like they baby him despite the fact that he is very capable of taking care of himself.

- They have a matching pokeball tattoo because the three of them first met and bonded over their love of Pokemon.

#creepypasta #creepypasta fandom #creepypasta headcanons #headcanons #ticci toby #toby rogers #clockwork #natalie ouellette #jeff the killer #jeff woods

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dogbunni · 1 year

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[begins coughing like a cat about to throw up a furball] [spits up several nendo headcanons and then looks at u proudly]

-nendo collects hot wheels. I have no justification beyond this except that I also collect hot wheels and I think we'd have that in common. if he was real I would take nendo to a toy shop to look at all the hot wheels. just stand there and observe them for an uncomfortably long time. my friends aren't deeply autistic enough to do this with me so I can never observe the little cars for long enough before making a purchase :(

-nendo trans ally #1

-nendo has no idea what his sexuality is but not in a confused/questioning way, in a "I have never thought about it longer than 1 second" way. he likes who he likes and has no thoughts beyond that. he is label-less in a [shrugs shoulders] way. (saiki is also label-less but in a "fuck you" kind of way)

-nendo loves rollercoasters and watches weird essay length youtube videos about theme parks and animatronics. its a hobby that deeply disturbs everyone around him bc this guy cannot do basic math but he can and will channel the spirit of akechi rambling about defunct animatronics. sometimes he shows saiki pictures of animatronics in late stages of decay in horrible pitch black nightmare settings and saiki reacts as if nendo has placed a live cockroach in his lap.

-he has a condiment problem. steals sauce packets from restaurants with diagnosable compulsion.

-he doesn't Get memes. everyone has tried and failed to show nendo a meme. it's like trying to show your mother a funny picture and she holds the phone as far away from her face as she can and then stares at it for way too long before silently handing it back. he just doesn't Get It.

-hes like, really good at making memes though. he will just absently turn a phrase or take an image so absurd that everyone is still saying and reposting and reacting with it years down the line. he has no idea that he has this power

-he feeds stray cats and makes little shelters for them outdoors <3

-nendo and kaido roleplay together sometimes. I'm talking like, warrior cats roleplay. sometimes dark reunion but kaido gets pissy if nendo messes up The Lore. nendo calls it "playing pretend" bc he has no concept of cringe culture and kaido dies inside every time

-he manages to forget his own birthday. every year. saiki remembers though, and it's the one and only day he will ask if nendo wants to get ramen with him, instead of the other way around. it gets to the point that saiki asks if nendo wants ramen, and he says "what, is it my birthday ahaha" and saiki is just like. you goddamn idiot. good grief.

-last time I did one of these I said that nendo loves cute things like sanrio plushies and holds them so gently. well I see that and I am correct, but I raise you nendo thinking that SAIKI is the cutest thing he's ever seen. something about the pink hair and glasses and the little limiter bubbles on his head and his purple eyes and little frowny eyebrows- nendo wants to. hold gently. sometimes he just grabs saiki by the shoulders and stares at him blank in the face and saiki is like [nervously] "what the fuck? what the fuck????"

-he and aiura actually get along weirdly well. they're unhinged in similar flavours and it gets saiki's blood pressure up. he tries at all costs to keep them away from each other. their singular brain cells cancel each other out on sight.

-akechi makes nendo's brain hurt a little. he just can't process all of akechi's akechi-ness and it makes him feel dumb. he's fine with being dumb most of the time but akechi just makes him feel a little self conscious for some reason. (definitely not because he's jealous that akechi was friends with saiki first)

-he still likes the funny lil guy though. akechi's the only one who will enthuse with him about rollercoasters and he values those talks. so much.

-toritsuka is afraid of nendo for some reason. no one is sure why but nendo LOVES it. he's always trying to jump out and scare him. saiki supports nendo in this endeavour ardently. toritsuka suffers.

-nendo falls down the weirdest tiktok rabbit holes. it got so bad once that they got teruhashi to distract him while kuboyasu lifted his phone and deleted the app off of it. it took nendo several months to realise he could redownload it.

#(projects all of my little idiosyncrasies onto nendo)#yeah that tracks #also #(sprinkles a little nensai into my headcanons. as a treat)#nendo posting #i love him a normal amount #saiki kusuo no ψ nan #saiki k #the disastrous life of saiki k.#nendo riki #nendou riki #nensai #saiki kusuo

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gamelpar · 11 months

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Hardcase: hey Jesse, can I ask a quick question?

Jesse: Shoot.

Hardcase, panicking, pulling out a blaster: Shoot at what?

Jesse, sleep-deprived, interpreting that as Hardcase's question: uhh, i guess, maybe that vase?

Hardcase, who has seen weirder things than an evil vase: got it.

[later]

Anakin: ...what happened to senator Amidala's vase?

Rex: Jesse's and Hardcase's brain cells cancel each other out.

#hardcase #arc trooper jesse #anakin skywalker #captain rex #501st legion #tcw #incorrect quotes #incorrect star wars quotes

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missmonsters2 · 1 year

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Keeping You Warm

[Pairing]: WENCLAIR (Wednesday x Enid)

[Summary]: Wednesday had warned Enid to dress warm for the weather, knowing the blonde had a penchant for thinking she was invincible because she was a werewolf. Because if Enid caught a cold...

Prompt: "Seriously, I told you that you would get sick going out like that."

[Warnings]: Soft. Wednesday being unable to say no to Enid. Jealous!Wednesday. They Held Hands™️. Xavier chokes. Bianca's annoyed.

[Note]: Your honor I love them.

Library Blog || AO3

Reminder there's no taglist but you can follow my library blog for notifications 💘

⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷†⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷

Wednesday's eyes narrowed in on Enid's form from across the courtyard.

The cold season had settled in, a blanket of white snow covering the ground. The air was biting and nipping at people's skin.

It was evident in the way Enid's nose, ears, and cheeks were rosy red. Wednesday watched as Enid talked animatedly with Yoko while the rest of their little ragtag group hung around, most likely waiting for her.

The day had started early with Wednesday waking up to Enid's face at the edge of her bed, half obscured. The surprising sight would've normally frightened someone, but Wednesday merely glared.

"What are you doing, Enid?"

"Wednesday," Enid whined, and the dark-haired girl was tempted to turn around and go back to sleep immediately. Enid whining never meant good things. "Come to the Jericho Yule Festival with me and everyone else today!

"No," Wednesday monotoned. "I already went with you to the Christmas Lights last week."

"And now it's the Yule Festive this week," Enid rebutted.

Wednesday remained silent but internally sighed. Why was it so difficult to say no to Enid firmly? Still, Wednesday kept her mouth shut and closed her eyes. Saying nothing wasn't saying yes.

Then, the sound of Enid's forlorn sigh filled the room.

"Okay," the blond conceded as she straightened her back before getting up to sit on the edge of Wednesday's bed with a slouch. "I guess I could partner up with Ajax for the couple's activities."

Wednesday's eyes opened back, trailing to the side to look at Enid's back. She was wearing that colorful sweater that looked like a unicorn puked on it.

"What?" was the only word to come out of Wednesday's mouth.

But Enid understood and blabbered away. "Well, Ajax's date canceled on him yesterday, so he can't do any of the partner activities since if you were coming, it would've made the numbers odd. But I guess since you're not coming, I can do stuff with Ajax."

That sentence alone sounded all wrong to Wednesday, bringing up unpleasant feelings she was unfamiliar with. But then again, Enid brought forth a lot of feelings she wasn't familiar with lately.

Some were good, and some made her...feel violently sick—in a good way?

"I thought you two broke up," Wednesday commented instead.

"Yeah," Enid shrugged, and Wednesday couldn't tell what the blonde felt about it without seeing her face. "But we ended on good terms and all the prizes for the couple activities are really, really cool. I want to win them all."

The idea of Ajax and Enid working in tandem and cheering, and hugging each other in victory (because Enid was definitely most likely going to hug him out of excitement) had Wednesday begrudgingly say—

"Fine. I'll go."

Enid immediately turned around, her face bright and excited. "Really?" She squealed. "I'm so excited! I just know we're going to crush everyone else."

"Of course," Wednesday looked unperturbed. "I want to see Bianca's face of utter defeat." Then, Wednesday raised her brow at Enid. "Dress warmly. Ever since you wolfed out, you have suddenly lost a few brain cells and think you're immune to the cold. I will end you if you get sick."

Enid merely rolled her eyes before she pounced onto Wednesday, her body half-pressed into her and arms wrapped around her neck.

"Enid," Wednesday grouched.

Yet, despite her stern warning for Enid to dress appropriately for the weather, there the blonde was: no hat, no scarf, and no gloves.

Not even her hideous snood.

Wednesday walked forward, and Xavier was the first to greet her. She nodded in acknowledgment to the entire group before glaring at Enid.

"Why aren't you dressed appropriately for the weather?"

"You aren't either!" Enid scrunched her nose at Wednesday as she took in the other girl's attire. "Except for your gloves, I guess."

"That's because my body is naturally colder than the weather," Wednesday raised her brow.

"Well, that's simply not true," Enid smirked, and if Wednesday could, she would have blushed.

"Let's just get going," Bianca curled her lips in annoyance at the weird display Enid and Wednesday have been putting on lately. "The cabs are already here."

The group began making their way toward the entrance of the school quickly. Despite ordering two cabs, Wednesday still felt claustrophobic being pressed up against someone as she sat next to the door.

The ride was noisy, but Wednesday found it was easy to drown out if she focused on Enid's chattering. Soon enough, they arrived in the town. If Wednesday thought last week they had over-decorated, this was pure Christmas vomit. Apparently, Yule Fest was their biggest event of the year.

The group decided to walk around first to check out the area, but not even a quarter way in, Wednesday could feel Enid shivering against her when she walked too close.

But it was only when Enid sneezed that Wednesday stopped walking.

"Seriously, I told you that you would get sick going out like that," Wednesday snapped.

Her tone made everyone jump, but Enid merely sneezed again and looked pitiful.

Suddenly, Wednesday yanked on Xavier's scarf, making him momentarily choke as it unraveled around his neck.

"What the hell, Wed—" He started to say, but his jaw dropped.

Wednesday lifted her arms and used his scarf to wrap around Enid's neck delicately.

"What do you think will happen if you get sick?" Wednesday frowned. "Do you expect me to make you soup and nurse you back to health?"

"I wouldn't dream of it," Enid smiled, watching as Wednesday then turned to Yoko and sniped the girl's hat, ignoring the vampire's grunt and glare.

"No, you should not because I will leave you to perish," Wednesday said as Enid lowered her head slightly so that she could put the hat onto the blonde.

"Thing will take care of me," Enid grins in a mischievous way that has Wednesday glaring at her through her brows and cheeks more angular than usual when she pursed her lips. "Or not," Enid quickly amended.

"C'mon," Bianca looked at the remaining group. "Let's get going before Enid's stupidity costs us all of our winter wear."

Wednesday gave the siren a dark look.

Bianca was unfazed as she smirked before gathering the group to walk along, leaving the two to trail slowly behind.

"Sorry," Enid mumbled as they walked. "And thank you."

Wednesday could feel their hands brush against each other occasionally and pursed her lip. Enid's hand felt cold to her, which was saying something because Wednesday's hand temperature was probably close to freezing.

Wednesday stopped walking again, causing the werewolf to jerk to a stop as well.

Enid looked at Wednesday curiously as the dark raven sighed, pulling off one of her gloves and handing it to her.

"I'm not giving you both," Wednesday warned.

Enid smiled as she took the glove and wore it on the hand that faced the outside. "You don't need to," Enid said but then looked mischievous as she wriggled her fingers on her bare hand. "But there is a way to keep both our hands warm."

Wednesday looked at her curiously.

Enid took Wednesday's gloveless hand, causing the other girl to tense up. Ignoring it, Enid stuck both their hands into her jacket pocket and started walking, giving no choice but for Wednesday to begin moving too.

"Enid," Wednesday frowned.

"Shh," Enid comforted. "It's fine. They're not going to look behind because they're too scared you'll probably stab their eyes out."

With that reassurance (not that Wednesday needed it), Wednesday allowed the contact, walking quietly next to the blonde and keeping her warm.

#wenclair #wednesday addams x Enid Sinclair #Wednesday x Enid #wenclairedit #wednesday #wednesday addams #wenclair fanfiction #wenclair fanfic #enid sinclair x wednesday addams #enid x wednesday

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sage-nebula · 3 days

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Watcher Update Debrief

I am several days late on posting my full thoughts on Watcher's update regarding their streamer, because each day when I come home from work I feel too tired to do so (and I can't post while I'm at work because my work computer prohibits access to tumblr due to it being a "video streaming website" -- yes, you may laugh). Truth be told, I'm still too tired to do so, but each day that goes by this gets less and less relevant, and after posting so much about the situation over the weekend I don't want to just not post anything about the update video, because I feel I have to give some closure on this. So without further ado, here is that closure. This is going to be pretty long as well (hence not wanting to post it on my cell phone at work), so once again I'm going to put this under a cut to spare everyone's dashboards.

First, I want to address the actions they've announced they're taking regarding the backlash they've received in regards to the streamer, setting aside the actual content of the video itself. (Because there is a lot to dissect in the video itself, both in what they say and how they present what they say, and I want to give full attention to that.)

When Watcher announced the streamer last Friday, they said that they would be virtually quitting YouTube altogether. All they would post on YouTube in the future would be the premiers of each new show, while the seasons themselves would only be released on the streamer, which would require a subscription for the annual price of $60, or the monthly price of $6 (which would total $72 for the year). This of course was only factoring rates for United States residents; the prices would be higher for those internationally. It's also not getting into how the original plan was also to pull all older seasons off YouTube, as evidenced by what the company told Variety, before Ryan backtracked it in response to the initial backlash.

However, in the update, the Watcher team reveals that they are backtracking as much as they can with regards to the streamer. While they are still going to have the streamer for the prices listed, they are going to still upload new seasons of their shows to YouTube, albeit one month later than the shows premier on the streamer. For people who have already subscribed who wouldn't have had they known this was going to happen, they can ask for a refund and they will receive it. Additionally, patrons of the Watcher Patreon will now receive access to the streamer for free, and can also reach out to Watcher for a refund if they've already subscribed to the streamer.

In my opinion, this is the best case scenario. I know there are some people out there who are upset that they haven't canceled the streamer entirely, but for reasons I've spoken about in other posts / comments, I really don't think it's possible. When I wrote my initial debrief post, I thought that they had built their streamer from the ground up, because that was how they made it sound in their initial announcement video. It has since come to light that they're using Vimeo's OTT service. But here is the thing about Vimeo's OTT service: it is not free. And while there is a standard plan that allows a customer to pay $1 per subscriber, the much more likely plan that a company like Watcher is going to use is the Enterprise plan, which would require a contract.

Here are the details of the Enterprise plan:

The expanded bandwidth, upload hours, and 1080p HD streaming are reason enough for Watcher to go with the Enterprise plan over the Standard plan, but any company with half a brain cell would want a dedicated support team in case something happens to go wrong with the streamer at any point. The Standard plan is for individuals who want to get into hosting streaming websites for the first time; the Enterprise plan (as the name suggests) is for companies who want to do so, and Watcher is company.

You'll notice, though, that the Enterprise plan works by a monthly or yearly subscription, and that there is no flat rate available. This means that Watcher would have already negotiated a price, and likely has already paid at least some, if not all money up front (assuming they went yearly instead of monthly, and as Watcher's own plan shows, you normally get discounts for annual plans over monthly ones). What this means is that Watcher has absolutely already put money into the streamer, and that they are in a contract they likely cannot break without incurring more fees / losing money they have spent. So at least for the time being, the streamer has to exist. They can't simply walk away from it completely like some people still want them to.

So with that in mind, deciding to release the new seasons for free a month later on YouTube is the best possible outcome. They're still keeping the streamer for those who have and want to be subscribed to it. Releasing content early on a paid platform (such as, and I am just spitballing wildly here, Patreon) is a practice that many YouTubers have engaged in for a long while now. And I would guess the month delay is because they still really, really want to lure people to the streamer. Depending on how much money they put into that Vimeo OTT contract (and I really have no way of knowing how much money that was), I can understand why. Even so, it is a surprise to me that they are willing to compromise with the fans at all. I really was not expecting them to walk back any part of the decision. So this really is the best possible outcome any of us could have hoped for, in regards to specific actions regarding the decision they made before. The future of Watcher doesn't look as bleak now as it did on Friday.

With that said, let's address the content of the video itself.

Setting aside the "three ex-Buzzfeed employees on a couch" meme quality of the video (especially since the Try Guys on the couch hadn't done anything wrong themselves, whereas the Watcher guys did), here are the specific things I want to address:

1.) They centered Shane in the update video. I believe this was deliberate.

Over the weekend, huge swaths of the fandom blamed Ryan and especially Steven while exonerating Shane. At best, they just ignored Shane. At worst, they insisted that he was secretly against the idea all along and that the other two (especially Steven) had forced him into it / outvoted him. Setting aside the implicit racism in all of this (because although the fandom has had a very hard time admitting it, you don't find the men of color inherently untrustworthy / unlikable / unrelatable and the white man inherently relatable / trustworthy / likable without implicit biases, you just don't), it's unreasonable to think they didn't notice with the flood of hateful comments flooding Steven's and Ryan's socials while Shane got less heat. Not no heat, mind, but considerably less when compared with the other two.

So upon noticing that, they centered Shane -- who was still the most liked by the fandom, the one still seen as a "comrade" by a huge number of the fandom -- in the middle of the couch, to draw the eye, to play to the audience subconscious. The sight of Steven (and to a lesser extent Ryan) makes you angry? Put them to the side, put Shane in the middle. Let his white face calm you down. It absolutely sucks ass that this was needed, but again, there were both explicit racist comments and implicit racism at play all over the place this past weekend. It was disgusting, I'm sure they noticed, and they staged themselves on that couch accordingly.

(And it was staged, as well, because on the podcast they've talked about how Ryan often likes sitting in the center and Shane (and Steven) prefer sitting off to the sides. And in the first video we see this; Ryan is in the middle, with Steven and Shane are on either side of him. But in this one, it's switched. Wonder why? This is why.)

2.) They acknowledge that they messed up, and they apologize.

Now, their bad business decision is their bad business decision. If they wanted to tank their company by moving completely to a paywalled streamer that doesn't have nearly enough content to appease less than the most diehard of fans, much less appeal to potential new customers, that's on them. But in their announcement video, they were obtuse about the financial situations of many of their fans; they were patronizing, they were arrogant . . . they messed up. They messed up, and they say it plainly, and they apologize.

This is the most basic, the lowest of bars to clear. But many YouTubers fail to clear it. It's refreshing to see that they haven't. Personally, I have respect for people who can own their mistakes, apologize, and then resolve to do better in the future. We are all human; we are all going to fuck up at some time or another. The important thing is to acknowledge when we do, apologize for it, and then try not to do it again in the future. The fact that these three acknowledged that they fucked up, apologized for it, and then outlined the actions they're taking to fix the wrong actions they took above are all good things in my eyes.

(On that note, I also appreciate that they specifically address what hurtful things they said, and explain why those things are hurtful. They acknowledge that they blew off all the fans that couldn't afford the streamer, as well as the fans who have supported them via merch sales, Patreon subscriptions, live shows, et cetera for all these years. They acknowledge the comment about "a price anyone and everyone can afford" was insensitive and wrong. Anyone can say "I'm sorry" and have it be meaningless if they don't know why they should be sorry. The Watcher team clearly did listen to the feedback and understands what they did wrong. I appreciate that.)

3.) The one thing in the video I did not appreciate and that I think was a misstep was the part where Ryan tried to once again explain why they thought the streamer was a good idea.

We heard them explain in the announcement video that they need money from the streamer, and that they have a hard time reconciling their content with ads. The problem they face is this: if the audience didn't buy that then, they are not going to buy that now when they've had an entire weekend to be upset. And not only have they had an entire weekend to be upset, but we've also had at least one YouTuber who owns a company that connects YouTubers to advertisers lay out exactly how much money Watcher should be making from their channel and how friendly their channel is to advertisers, so the claims make even less sense now than they did before. Attempting to insist that, "we really do need the streamer money though" is doing little to convince those of us who didn't already believe that. You can say, "we would lose the company if we didn't do it" until you're blue in the face, but you really are wasting that breath.

More importantly, though . . . an apology is not the time for justifications. This video was meant to apologize for your wrongs to your community and announce the actions you are taking moving forward to right those wrongs. Which, to be fair, is what Watcher did. What the video was not for was to say, "But we were right to introduce the streamer because . . ." No one in your audience wants to hear that. Even if it made financial sense (which it did not), this is not the time or place for that, especially when what you are saying now is what you already said in the announcement video. It feels defensive at best. It's simply not the best move. It's not the time or place.

Which is not to say that nothing else should have been addressed here beyond an apology. Had they read a chunk of the fandom the riot act for the racism and other out of pocket comments (e.g. apparently people were posting on Ryan's wedding photos on IG that Mari would leave him when she realized how selfish and greedy he was), I would have supported them in that. Alas, twas not to be.

All in all, my final judgment on the whole situation is this: the response video is the best possible outcome any fans could have hoped for. I will remain subscribed to their YouTube channel, because I am an adult with a full time job and a life and so I don't mind watching the videos a month later if it means watching them for free. I accept the apology that the Watcher team has given, and I appreciate the fact that they got someone with actual public relations experience to assist them in writing and presentation (because they very clearly have a PR person assisting them now -- that was not a Watcher original production).

But just because I accept the apology doesn't mean that I have forgotten, or will forget, what has transpired. I have known for awhile now that Watcher Entertainment is not the tiny underdog they pretend to be. After all, they got DISNEY to sponsor them for an episode of Ghost Files. (The Haunted Mansion episode, to be specific.) When you have Mickelous Fucking Mouse himself opening his checkbook to cut you some cheddar for advertising, you have hit the big time. You can no longer claim to be a small, pitiable underdog at that point. Previously, I was happy for them that they were hitting the big time. I remember messaging a good friend of mine so excited that they were getting paid by The Mouse. After this debacle, though? Seeing them pretend to be starving to death while still getting cut checks by huge corporations for ad revenue? That sweet taste has turned rather bitter, especially when their merch -- multiple items of which I have purchased -- is so overpriced as well. (I paid over $80 for that Mystery Files jacket. It's just a regular denim jacket with the logos stenciled on . . . I was glad to support them and to have a jacket featured on the show, but now . . . smh.)

All of this is to say: I will still watch their shows for free on YouTube. I'll listen to their podcast when I need background noise. But I'll never again buy a piece of merch. And I'll regard them as I do the owners of any other company: businessmen who are, at the end of the day, there to make money. They are company owners, they are actors, and they are nothing more than that. And that's fine. They don't have to be.

That's where I stand, anyway. Everyone else is free to reach their own conclusions on the matter.

#don't bother trying to argue that ''people weren't racist''#or ''it was ok to be vile to Steven bc [reasons ppl dug up to justify their racism]'' or i'll just block you tho #watcher #watcher entertainment #shane madej #steven lim #ryan bergara

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