#the critics did not lie she simply does not have the range

[skellebonez]

Prompts 1, 9, 17, and 49. Huntsman Has been visiting Sandy for a few weeks now and Moe has made it clear he does not trust the spider. One day, while Sandy's busy Huntsman decides he's had enough of this cat and goes into a rant which then turns into him venting some stuff. Therapy cats are for more then just pets apparently. (Bonus points if it's from Moe's POV) - Pixel Anon

Apparently I am bad at figuring out how to write from a cat’s POV, but this was the PERFECT prompt for me to continue Second Chances Over Tea! This is where stuff really starts to... deviate.

Do not give me that look/How long have you been standing there?/I can’t do this even though everyone says I can./That cute act is all just a lie.

Where time had gone Huntsman had no idea. There was both no time and too much time. Syntax had everything he needed to rebuild and reprogram the spider bots and he’d been doing everything he could to try to replicate the venom with little to no success, much to the increased frustration of the Spider Queen.

She wasn't upset at him, not really. Huntsman knew she was just taking out her frustration at the situation on the poor scientist. Had it been in the weeks before Huntsman would have brushed it off and told him to deal with it.

But now... he felt bad for him. He could tell Syntax was trying his best. The human turned demon wasn’t quite as harsh and clinical as he had pin pointed him as, that much had become clear when he had noticed Huntsman’s odd behavior. His behavior since he has started sneaking out to visit Sandy. He never pushed, never pried, but did make a point to remind him to charge his communicator and to message him on the nights he was out.

Huntsman wasn’t stupid. He knew that Syntax knew he was lying. There was no need to go out and search for materials or do more recon now, the scientist knew that. But he never pushed, never yelled at him to stay and help (though that was probably because he knew that this stuff was not Huntsman’s line of specialty), never prodded about exactly where he went.

Though he had to know by now.

He’d pointed out the smell of motor oil and tea clinging to his clothes once, when they were alone. The cat fur and nip that has stuck to the edges of his undershirt another day. The saltwater that made his hair stick awkwardly to his face and lingered in the air yet another. Huntsman realized over a week into his nightly visits that there was a GPS built into in his communicator.

Syntax wasn’t stupid either. He knew Huntsman was visiting Sandy. He had to have. Huntsman did not trust him to not have turned on that GPS remotely on that first night to learn where he was.

So why stay quiet?

And why was Huntsman thinking these things, things he wouldn’t have thought weeks ago had he been doing something similar in other circumstances?

... he knew why... and it had to do with where he was. And who had been slowly starting to make him look at others with a more critical eye outside the hunt.

He let these thoughts roll around in his head, thoughts he has pushed down and down and farther down until over the course of the last 18 days, 2 and a half weeks and nearly a month since he stole the Crimson Jimsonweed petal from Sandy and the other reached out a hand in kind, until this moment.

It was just past 2:30 in the morning. Huntsman was laying on Sandy’s couch, only the third time he had stayed since that first late night, the other having gone to bed himself. And that blue cat with the matching mohawk was sitting on his chest.

“Get off me,” he hissed, only to be met with a low hiss from the feline. Not a warning or a threat, more a rebuttal to his own. Mo, he knew his name was, and he was the favored cat of Sandy. Always with him, on his shoulder or somewhere nearby. A smart and feisty little thing. He simply stared at the spider demon, moving to sit more firmly on his chest with a thump of his tail and a low purr. “Do not give me that look, cat. Or the purr. That cute act is all just a lie, I know you don’t like me being here.”

Mo did not reply, as he was simply a cat. But he blinked slowly at Huntsman, something Sandy told him cats only did with people they trusted not to hurt them, and he narrowed his gaze at the cat in suspicion.

“I’m getting mixed signals here,” he said, sighing as he sat up in defeat knowing he would not be resting any time soon with his racing thoughts. Instinctively, as he’d done this many times before with the other cats on the ship, he wrapped his arms around his stomach and let Mo slide into being held to his chest. The cat seemed to smirk in victory, as if getting him up and messing with him was his plan all along. “You’re weird. But then again so am I. So is everything about this... whatever this is.”

He reaches up, scratching behind the oddly colored cat’s ears and earned no reaction aside from the continued stare of the cat.

“Don’t think I haven’t noticed that you watch me every time I come over,” he continued, stopping his scratching before roughly picking him up and holding him out across from him to glare at the cat. “How you always sit where you can watch me, are constantly glaring at me and growling when I get too close to your owner. How you just don’t trust me even though I haven’t done anything to you or him since that time on the mountain. But why would you trust me anyway, I just showed up one day in your house after we attacked you on New Years so... I can’t really blame you...”

He frowned, putting the cat down far more gently than he had held him up. He rubbed his face, looking down at the communicator that he wore with a sigh.

“... everything we did on the Lunar New Year was a mistake,” he muttered to himself, grazing the communicator with a claw. “I never asked any questions. Just went along with what my Queen asked of me. If I had asked something, anything, maybe she wouldn’t have accepted that spirit’s help with her plan. I was her advisor until Syntax came along, I should have said something! I’m supposed to be a hunter but I couldn’t even realize we were the ones being hunted until it was too late!”

This seemed to catch Mo’s attention. The smirk on the cat’s face faded into something of confusion, if that was possible for a cat, and he took a step forward and placed a paw on Huntsman’s leg and mewed up at him.

The spider demon barely reacted, not pushing Mo away like he normally would.

“If I had said anything Syntax would probably still be human, I’d still be advisor, and we wouldn’t be scrambling like headless chickens trying to figure out what she’s planning on using us for! Or Syntax wouldn’t because for some reason I’m here, on this couch, instead of in our lair! I’m here running away from the problem, giving them the barest scraps of tech I weasel out of your owner with nice conversation and company for tea because... because what!?”

He growled, curling in on himself a bit as he bit down on one of his fingers in frustration. But the words kept coming, maybe it was because he hadn’t slept since the night before or maybe it was just a long time coming. Maybe being constantly somewhere he finally felt safe when he hadn’t realized how unsafe he felt in the lair over the last few months broke down his walls that he spent so long building up. Maybe the talking he’d done with Sandy did it.

Or maybe there was no reason aside from him feeling safe ranting at a cat.

“I came for help at first but I didn’t need to keep coming. But I have every day and I know why but I just-I can’t! I can’t keep coming here every day like this, we’re running out of time! But I don’t want to go back, not with her there. But I have to, my Queen and Goliath and Syntax the smarmy bastard are there without me and I just... I can’t do this even though Sandy says I can. I’m...”

“Scared,” Sandy’s voice came from the nearby doorway, startling the spider demon from his ranting and making him realize that at some point Mo had actually crawled into his lap and was pawing at his hand.

“How long have you been standing there?” Huntsman asked in horror, not knowing how he could have possibly managed to miss the large form of the blue demon just. Standing there.

“Long enough,” he said softly, coming over and grabbing Huntsman’s wrist with the gentlest grip he could manage and pulling it away to inspect the bite he had inflicted on himself. “Huntsman, you-”

A soft bing rang through the air, the text notification from his communicator, breaking the tension between the two as Huntsman pulled his arm back to check it quickly.

‘Huntsman, Spider Queen is demanding your presence. She is getting angry. If you are awake you must return at once. Immediately, if possible.’

Another one came in, typed so fast he could barely finish reading the first.

‘Goliath is getting worried about her. Scared. She’s angrier than I’ve seen her since the festival and won’t listen to us. We need you here.’

And another.

‘I need you back here. Please come back. Please.’

Please...

In all the time Huntsman had known Syntax the other had never said that word without being condescending... but something about these texts... and the timing...

“Something’s wrong,” he said to Sandy, standing quickly and dropping Mo onto the couch gently. “I have to go.”

“Home?” Sandy asked, reaching to grab Huntsman’s coat without another question.

“Yes,” he replied, realizing that... oddly, that felt like the wrong answer to him. Somehow. “Synta-”

“You don’t have to explain,” Sandy interrupted, pushing a small parcel into Huntsman’s hands. “Not if it slows you down. Go, it’s the piece you said your friend needed.”

“... thank you,” Huntsman said, after a short pause, feeling like he should have done more as he rushed out the door and into the warm dark of night.

He thought he heard Sandy’s phone ring as he left but couldn’t be certain.

~

“You keep going,” Huntsman said after a short pause, turning back in the direction they came. “Just in case. But I have something I want to check.”

“Uh, be careful!” Goliath yelled back as Huntsman broke out his mechanical legs and sprinted back toward where they left the mech.

He may not know the Monkie Kid well, but Sandy had told him enough about MK that he thought that maybe... maybe...

Maybe if he came clean to Spider Queen...

He thought he heard a distant yelp that almost sounded like Syntax.

When he had returned Huntsman had found that Syntax was telling the truth. Their Queen was working in a near frenzy, trying to rush through the building of their mech. Syntax was trying to explain to her that there was not enough time to complete it at the rate she was requesting without the venom, that even with the extra materials the bots had gathered with the tech Huntsman himself had proffered they weren’t fast enough.

Then the Monkie Kid had literally fallen into their lair.

Huntsman didn’t know why he was there. He knew that Sandy couldn’t have told him what they were doing, he knew the other wouldn’t do something like that now after all the time they had spent together. His only guess was that one of the things that the bots had grabbed for the mech had belonged to the young man.

He heard the sound of fighting, his Queen and the Monkie Kid yelling, and somewhere distantly... he thought he heard Goliath yell too.

He almost turned around, almost went back, but something kept him going.

Until he burst into their little hideaway in the lair, a flash of golden light and the Monkie Kid standing over his Queen laying on the ground with the mech head destroyed behind him. They didn’t see him, but he could hear them clearly.

“Haven’t you figured that out yet?” His Queen argued. “There’s no running from what she is!”

Whispers on the wind followed and in flash of more brilliant, powerful light, there she was.

“Spider Queen’s right,” the Lady Bone Demon, the Lady White Bone, The White Bone Spirit, agreed as she stood tall and imposing and terrifying above them all. “Destiny will always catch up.”

Huntsman didn’t know what she did. Something, clearly, as the Monkie Kid held his head in clear confusion and agony and backed away from her in fear as Spider Queen stepped between the two of them. And without thinking he rushed forward, moving to stand behind MK and glower at the possessed girl before the three of them.

“Ah,” LBD breathed with a smile, tilting her head playfully as she looked at Huntsman and drew the other’s attention to him. “I was wondering where the final unnecessary piece ran off to. No matter, captured or not you’re only an extra in this little game anyway.”

“You!” Spider Queen snapped, turning her attention back to LBD once her surprise at seeing Huntsman had worn off.”I should have taken you out the second you walked into my lair!” She turned to MK and Huntsman with a look the elder demon knew to be full of disguised fear of her own. “Both of you! RUN!”

It happened so fast. Lady Bone Demon did something and... and Syntax was there. And Goliath. But they weren’t, it wasn’t them, not as they were. Blue and white and cold and ghostly instead. His Queen lunged at them and LBD and his own survival instincts took over as he grabbed MK’s arm and RAN. He barely registered when the young man pulled away from him and golden light flashed and suddenly they were going up.

There was something gripping his shoulder, sharp and small and he realized that somehow, some way, MK had turned into a bird and was flying out of the sewers with Huntsman and a sign of some kind in either claw.

There was more blue, a brilliant flash from that shot up into the sky, and the two of them plus the sign crash landed onto a roof.

A roof with a pig demon, a young girl with green streaks in her hair, an oddly well dressed for bed attire man who looked at him with more recognition than the other two... and Sandy.

Sandy, who looked down at him and MK with a mixture of confusion and slowly dawning horror at where MK must have gone and what them being together must mean.

As the Spider Demon stood, slow and clumsy in his lack of sleep and the shakiness of adrenaline, he looked back to the young man who had pulled him out of harm’s way without a single question.

“We have some explaining to do, kid.”

#monkie kid #lego monkie kid #fanfic #ship fic #gen fic #silktea #huntsman #sandy #mk #qi xiaotian #spider queen #lady bone demon #white bone spirit #second changes over tea #prompt fill

[just-dreaming-marvel]

Love and Medicine ~ 12

MASTERLIST

< previous chapter

Word Count: 2,815ish

Summary: You are still trying to cope with the fact that Steve’s married. (Read note at the end of the chapter.)

I do not own Grey’s Anatomy or Marvel.

You and Natasha eventually found your way back to your house and into your bedroom’s adjoining bathroom. Natasha was in the bathtub as you laid on the floor.

“It's not us. It's them,” you said. “Them and their stupid boy penises. They didn't tell me they had a wife. They gave absolutely no warning that they were going to break up with you.”

“It's not that Banner broke up with me,” Natasha began. “It's how he broke up with me. Like it was business. Like it was a business transition like he's the boss of me!”

“He is the boss of you.”

“And what's worse is that I care.”

"I'm gonna throw up again.” You moved so that you were leaned over the toilet bowl. "No. Wait. False alarm.”

“Look, the problem is estrogen.”

“No, the problem is tequila.”

“I used to be all business, and then he goes and gets me pregnant.”

“With the stupid boy penis.”

“Now, I'm having hormone surges. He ruined me. I'm ruined. He turned me into this fat, stupid, pregnant girl. Who cares! Estrogen!”

Having heard the commotion from your bathroom, Val, Scott, and Clint found themselves standing in the doorway.

“Penises,” you stated. “Penises Val.”

“Estrogen, Scott. Estrogen,” Nat added.

“Okay…” Scott said, looking around. “What did I miss?”

“I came home to full on vomit drama,” Val explained. “Apparently she dumped Derek and her—“ Val pointed Nat’s way. “She’s been sleeping with Banner!”

“What?”

“So you really broke up with Rogers?” Clint asked.

“I feel empty,” you responded.

“Two hours of vomiting will do that to you,” Val said with a shrug.

“You’re lucky,” Nat added. “I feel pissed off.”

~~~

Arriving in the parking garage, you could clearly see Steve waiting for you. Getting out of your car, you slammed the door as he came closer.

“Stop,” you growled at him.

“What?” Steve questioned, pretending to be all innocent.

“You're stalking me. Stop it.” You continued into the building with Steve following you.

“Did we not communicate last night?”

“Yes.”

“Did you hear what I was saying?”

“Your wife screwed your best friend.”

“And then from that point on she no longer existed to me anymore.”

“You had marital amnesia?”

“No.” Steve reached out and grabbed your arm, successfully stopping you. “Come on I bared my soul to you last night.”

“It's not enough.”

“How can that be not enough?”

“When you waited 2 months to tell me and I had to find out by her showing up, all leggy and fabulous and telling me herself, you pulled the plug. I'm a sink with an open drain. Anything that you say runs right out. There is no enough.” You pulled away hurrying inside with your friends after you.

“She probably could've picked a better metaphor,” Clint commented.

“Give her a break,” Scott said. “She’s got a hangover.”

With a huff, Steve followed. Tony, who was also coming in, quickly caught up to him.

“Dr. Rogers!” He called.

“Dr. Stark,” Steve replied.

“We have an organ donor coming in this afternoon. We're doing a harvest.”

“Commendable, but—“

“In OR one at four.”

“I’m in OR one at four.”

“Your surgery is non-critical.”

“You can’t bump me!”

“As Chief, I can. You’ll be first up tomorrow.”

“Interim Chief. Bump somebody else!”

“You’re in the OR we need.”

“Why can’t the harvest be done somewhere else?”

“Cause the donor’s coming in from a small facility. We have the location, the airport nearby and the staff. Your surgery is rescheduled.” Then Tony turned, heading away.

“I’m not done talking about this, Stark!”

“Well, I am! See ya around Rogers!”

~~~

Rounds weren’t too bad, especially because you successfully ignored both Peggy and Steve. It even became slightly better when Gamora called you in for a bowel obstruction. Except the guy wouldn’t tell you what he ingested.

“You know, Mr. Sanders, it would be easier if you just told us what you ingested,” you pried, taking him to radiology. “We’ll know anyone, once we see the films.”

“You’re beautiful, you know that?” Mr. Sanders responded.

“Mr. Sanders, whatever you’ve ingested could kill you. Are you sure you don’t just want to tell me?”

“It might offend you.”

“It might? Is it drugs?”

“No.”

“Mr. Sanders.”

“It’s not drugs, I promise.”

“Well, good, I’m glad.”

“I… Nope, not going to tell you.”

“Fine by me. We just reached radiology, so I’m going to find out anyway.”

It wasn’t long before Mr. Sanders was back in his room and the radiologist had found you with the scans.

“It’s drugs,” the radiologist stated handing the scans over to you. “Looks like at least 13 small balloons in the bowel. My guess, cocaine.”

“Hmm,” you hummed, holding up the scans up to the light. 

They didn’t totally look like balloons, so you weren’t completely convinced. Before you made any judgement calls, you found Gamora.

“It’s drugs,” you told her, handing her the scans. 

“Stupid, stupid, stupid,” she muttered, placing the scans onto a screen. “One burst and he’s dead in minutes. Okay, what do we do?”

“Run his bowel.”

“And what does that mean?”

“Running the bowel entails removing all 36 feet of the intestine from the body cavity, hand searching for the balloons and then cutting them out.”

“Good. Book an OR and get two other interns on board, need all the hands we can get.”

“Dr. Gamora,” Y/N called as Gamora tired to leave. 

“Yes?”

“Are you sure they’re balloons?”

“You have reason to believe they’re not?”

“Well, the more I look the more I realize that this one,” you pointed to the scans, “has a face.” Gamora looked closer. “And this one… they all do.”

“I’ll be damned. They’re Barbies. He swallowed 13 Barbie doll heads.”

~~~

“Barbie heads?” Scott repeated after you told him, Natasha, and Peter what happened.

“Yeah,” you responded. “And Gamora wants two of you to join us in surgery.”

“I’m already booked.”

“I can do it,” Natasha said.

“Me too,” Peter said.

“My foster mothers used to buy me Barbie dolls. All sorts of them.”

“I also wanted one,” you added. “My parents never let me.”

“I dissected them. Cut off their arms, shaved their heads.”

“You’re a little scary,” Scott stated. “You know that?”

“I try.”

“Sounds like there’s a sick and twisted story behind this,” Peter said.

“No, they’re sexist, distorted devil toys that create unrealistic expectations carrying to the porn driven minds of men,” Natasha expressed.

“You swallow a bitter pill this morning, Romanoff?” Gamora questioned, coming up to you interns. “They’re just dolls. Quill, call for a psych consult. Then see if he has family.”

“Should I still book the OR?” You wondered.

“Blocked bowels become necrotic bowels. Check with Dr. Stark, see if we can bump someone. Those Barbies gotta come out today.”

~~~

Gamora had given Clint the impossible assignment to revive a patient. And, unfortunately for him, he was stuck with Laura.

“Any family members waiting?” He asked as he stapled up the man’s chest.

“Still trying to reach them,” Laura responded.

“Good. Well, I mean, not good that we haven’t reached anyone. Good that I don’t have to, uh…”

“It’s always hard.”

“Yeah.”

“I’m sorry about Peter.”

“It’s fine. It’s good. No need to talk about it.”

“You do understand that I had sex with him before you, not during, right? Because when you and I were together—“

“I understand.”

“I just wanted to clear the air.”

“Oh, it’s clear. Perfectly clear… okay.”

“Okay.”

“Okay.”

“And about the syphilis—“

“We really on’t have to talk about it.”

“Which is, I mean, I didn’t know I had it. I definitely should have, I’m a nurse. Like, there was a sore and I was all itchy.”

“Okay!” He backed away almost knocked the tray beside him over. “You know I, uh, got it. You know things happen.” He moved to the door, away from Laura.

“They really do. Things you wish you could change.”

Clint’s pager rang and he looked down. “It’s the Chief, I gotta take this.”

“Sure… Clint.”

“Yes?”

“You have to call it.”

“Call it?”

“Him.”

“Oh, yeah.” He looked at his watch. “Time of death 1:37.” He turned to leave again.

“And, Clint,” he paused, not turning around this time, “if we could, I wouldn’t mind trying again.”

“Maybe… some day…”

~~~

Tony was walking down the hall with Maria, going over the donor surgery.

“When is the donor getting here?” He asked.

“Should be here at 3. Harvest team’s not heir way in.”

“I also need to touch base with the transplant center about a patient here getting his son’s liver.”

You walked up. “Dr. Stark,” you called. “Dr. Gamora needs an OR and they’re all booked.”

“For?”

“An emergent bowel obstruction.” She handed him the scans.

“Drugs?”

“Barbie heads. 13 of them.”

“Seriously?”

“Yes.”

Maria looked at the films. “I can see their little faces,” she commented. “That patient must have serious issues.”

“Hill, can your hernia in 1 be bumped?” Tony asked.

“Most likely.”

“Do it.”

“On it.” Maria left.

“Thank you, Dr. Stark,” you said, moving to go.

Tony grabbed your wrist and stopped you. “Y/N, are you okay?”

“I’m fine.”

“Don’t lie.”

“I’m not. I’m really fine.” And you pulled away.

~~~

You, Gamora, and a doctor from psych were currently discussing the psych evaluation on Mr. Sanders.

“He’s not talking. It could be pica,” the psych doctor stated. “Doubtful for a man his age. Maybe an oedipal complex or an idolization of the doll as his partners. Or it could be that he simply enjoys it.”

“Now I've seen a lot of strange things in strange places but how does he enjoy this?” Gamora questioned.

“He’d enjoy it when they came out.”

“I didn’t need to hear that.”

“Dr. L/N,” Peggy called as she walked back. “May I speak with you for a moment?” You looked at Gamora for help.

“Don’t look at me. I’m not gonna help you.”

With a sigh, you went to Peggy and the two of you began walking away.

“I assume he told you why he left me,” she said.

Annoyed, you stopped in front of her. “Look, Dr. Rogers, will all do respect, this has nothing to do with me,” you said.

“Really? So you didn’t take him back. Good girl.”

“And int he future, I’d appreciate it if we could keep our relationship strictly professional.” You walked away.

“Y/N!” You stopped and turned back slightly to give Peggy your attention. “Sometimes people do desperate things to get someone’s attention.” You shook your head and started walking again. “There are two sides to every story!”

~~~

You, Peter, and Scott arrived at lunch first. The three of you picked a large table farthest away from the others.

“Look what I went out and got,” Peter said, putting a grocery bag on the table.  Opening the bag, he revealed 13 headless Barbie dolls.

“Really, Quill?” You wondered.

“That’s gross,” Scott cringed.

“I think it’s funny,” Peter said, smiling, as he laid them out on the table.

“Of course you do,” you muttered.

“Oh! That is sick!” Clint commented as him, Natasha, and Val walked up.

“Who would do that?” Val asked. They looked to see Peter smiling.

“Oh, look!” Natasha said, picking up a doll. “See Barbie fly.” She throw it at Peter, who ducked.

“Hey, Clint,” Laura greeted, walking by.

“Hey,” he replied, sitting down at not looking at you. The interns all gave him a look. “What?”

“She was trying to make up with you, Clint,” you told him. “You should go eat with her.”

“No, I shouldn’t…. No.”

“She’s cute and she likes you,” Scott said.

“You shouldn’t let a little syph get in the way of that,” Val added.

“It’s not the syph,” Clint insisted.

“It’s so the syph,” Natasha said.

“It’s not the syph!”

“Then what is it?” Val asked. Clint didn’t answer, looking down. “Oh.”

“What?” You wondered. Clint simply shrugged. “What is it?”

“There’s this other girl,” Val responded.

“Val!” Clint exclaimed.

“Other girl?” Natasha questioned. “You have another girl?!”

“He hasn’t told her that he likes her yet,” Val said.

“Val!” Clint exclaimed again. “This isn’t high school.”

“Clint has a little crush.”

“I do not… It’s a thing, a very personal thing. One day I would like to build on this thing with this other girl—woman. She’s all woman.”

“What are you doing, Clint?” You asked, slightly harsh.

“I-I don’t—“

“With Laura. What are you doing with her?”

“Oh. Nothing.”

“You’re letting her think you’re emotionally available. You’re letting her think she has a chance. And there is nothing worse in the world than think you have a chance when you really don’t!”

“Y/N is right,” Natasha said. “Tell her that there’s someone else. And tell her why, Clint. I mean— I mean at least give her the chance to have some feelings about it!”

“Why are you both yelling at me?” Clint asked.

“Because of the estrogen Clint! Because of all the estrogen!”

~~~

“Was it an act of desperation?” You asked Mr. Sanders as you headed into his surgery.

“Not at all,” he replied.

“Something to attract attention?”

“No.”

“I’m just trying to understand here. Why 13 doll heads?”

“Well because 14 would’ve been too much.”

You cringed and helped the nurses get Mr. Sanders on the operating table before going to scrub. It was Gamora, you, Peter, Val, and Natasha in the surgery.

“I think it has something to do with his mother,” Val suggested. “Maybe she always wanted a girl and gave him Barbie dolls because of it.”

“Ah, ah, I’ve got another one,” Peter said, showing the head in the intestine.

“Uh!” You groaned.

“Doyen clamps to Romanoff,” Gamora ordered. “L/N, push the head up to the incision.” You began to squeeze the doll head up through the intestine.

“Maybe his mother looked like a Barbie doll and he’s into voodoo,” Peter suggested. “Instead of sticking pins in… well…”

Dr. Stark entered the OR. “You good here?” He asked Gamora, observing you though.

“Couple more heads to go,” Gamora responded.

“Then L/N stay here. All you other interns I need you on other cases.”

You met Tony’s eyes before he walked out of the OR.

~~~

Clint was put on a case with Steve. They were about to go separate ways so that Clint could run labs, when Steve stopped. He looked back at Clint.

“Is she okay?” Steve asked.

“Who?” Clint questioned. He looked up at Steve and knew. “Y/N? She’s… hanging in there.”

“Look out for her.”

“I will.”

Then Steve walked away. Before Clint could get really far, Laura found him.

“The family of the guy we worked on this morning is here,” she told him.

“Thanks for letting me know,” Clint responded.

“Clint, I just want an answers, so that I can get on with my life if I need to.”

“Look, maybe I’m not over the Peter thing yet or the syph thing… And I really want to be, but there’s also another girl. And, to me, it doesn’t matter there’s this other guy and frankly I wouldn’t care if she gave me the Ebola virus… I like you, Laura, I really do. Just… I—“

“You’re going to need some time.”

“Yeah.” He kissed her forehead. “Thank you for understanding.”

~~~

Steve was standing alone in the elevator when Peggy walked in, both dressed to leave.

“Just when the day was improving,” he murmured.

“You told Y/N what happened?” Peggy asked.

“I did. Why? What did you tell her?”

“That sometimes people do desperate things to attract attention.”

“What? Wow. That's your side of this? That I didn't pay you enough attention. Is that you were thinking when you got naked with my best friend?”

Peggy reached over and stopped the elevator. "No, by that point I wasn't thinking at all Steve. By that point I was just scratching an itch. We got successful you and me. We got busy and we got lazy. We didn't even bother to fight any more Steve. And Bucky was there and I missed you. And now I'm sorry.” Steve restarted the elevator. “I’m more sorry than you can possibly imagine. But at least I'm talking to you about it.” The doors opened and Steve walked out. “Steve.”

“I’m a sink with an open drain, honey.”

~~~

“Did you get them all?” Mr. Sanders asked. You were checking on him, post-surgery.

“Yes,” you replied. “It wasn’t easy or very pleasant. How do you feel?”

“Empty… I feel empty now.”

“Yeah. I've been feeling a little bit of that myself lately.”

“I can tell.”

“Mr. Sanders, why does eating doll heads fill you up? What’s the satisfaction?”

“Do you really want to know?”

“Would it be too much information?”

“Might.”

“Maybe I’m better left in the dark.”

next chapter >

I leave for Disney World in a week. It is the last big family vacation that I will be on for a while. Because of that, I will not be on tumblr March 19th through March 24th. I will actually be deleting the app so that it’s not a distraction.

Most likely, nothing will be posted during that time. If something is, it will have been queued up. Things that are posted while I’m out of town will not have tag lists attached. I will put this note in all the fic posts until then.

So do not come at me for spending time with my family instead of including the tag list. (I say that knowing that people won’t care and still come at me.... be respectful and get over yourself.)

If you want to be added to the tag list, please dm me or send in an ask.

#steve rogers x reader #steve rogers imagine #Steve Rogers #steve rogers fanfiction #steve rodgers x reader #steve rodgers imagine #the avengers x reader #avengers x reader #marvel x reader #marvel imagine #marvel imagines #greys anatomy au #Marvel AU #marvel fanfiction

[jasontoddiefor]

Summary: Dai Bendu is the language of the Jedi. Here are four times Caleb Dume heard the word kanan. AN: I made a Jedi conlang with a friend and of course we had to write fanfiction about it. Read on AO3!

kanan /keɪnən/ noun runner, derived from kan /keɪn/, verb. "to run"

1.

Caleb giggled as he escaped the Jedi’s grip and immediately rushed off towards the playground, tracking the paint clinging to his robes through the whole room and causing the kind of trouble only younglings could. Cleaning up was boring, he much preferred playing and the older children of his Clan were currently engrossed in a fun game of push-and-pull.

“Cadeo, ibli kanan!” His Crèchemaster ordered, voice strict but fond.

Caleb did as told and stopped running, not because the four-year-old felt particularly scolded or caught. He merely wanted to protest the nickname he’d been given.

He crossed his arms in front of his chest and pouted.

“I’m not little,” he said and looked up to the Crèchemaster with his big round eyes, full of childish defiance.

“Oh?” The Master replied as they quickly caught up to Caleb and then bent down to pick him up. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah!” Caleb let himself be taken into the Crèchemaster’s arms, paint-stained fingers taking ahold of their robes. “I’m big!”

The Jedi suppressed a sigh when they saw the mess the boy was making. They suspected Caleb would be in their care a little longer than other younglings, need more time to find his place in the world

“I apologize then, my big runaway,” the Jedi said, smiling kindly at their charge. “But art hour is over and you need to get dressed in something clean.”

2.

Caleb was terrified. His Master – he had a Master now and she was cool and strong and kind and wanted him – had told him how gruesome the war was, how painful, but no matter how much she had tried to prepare him for it with verbal explanation, nothing could compare to experiencing it. Caleb felt as if the darkness was encroaching, surrounding him entirely with the grief of fallen brothers and civilians they were meant to protect. Caleb could only stare in fear into the faces of the people he had been responsible for. Adults twice his size and age were dependent on him, had died thinking he would come save them simply because he was a Jedi.

It was too much.

The world was too loud, too cruel, too dark and Caleb didn’t know how to escape these waters he was drowning in.

“Commander!”

Caleb was tackled to the ground as the very next second a bomb went off just where he had been. The blast of the explosion pushed him and the clone that had thrown themself on top of him even further down. His ears rang. Where before the battlefield had been loud and overwhelming, now a high-pitched shrill sound took over.

Caleb knew that all around him the world was still spinning, the galaxy moving through space, time still flowing, and yet it just felt as if it all froze. He just laid there, unmoving, the heavy body of a dead soldier sheltering him.

Caleb!

Caleb! Padawan, where are you?

Here! Caleb wanted to shout back, but when he opened his mouth, he tasted ashes upon his tongue, choked on the debris of the buildings falling apart around them.

Hurry, Padawan, his Master’s voice rang out. Enoah keel jire, ibli kanan. Kan!

Caleb tried to move his right hand, but only pain greeted him in turn. He must have broken it in the fall. Biting on his lips so hard they bled, he used his left hand instead to push his savior off him and get to his knees. The fight was still going on and showed no sign of stopping anytime soon, but Caleb couldn’t stay.

He had to follow his Master’s words, he had to move, he had to get back home.

You are fast, little runner. Run!

And Caleb did, not daring to stop until he could collapse into his Master’s arms.

3.

“Caleb Dume died with Depa Billaba,” he said, climbing up his new ship. “Me, I barely remember the guy.”

It was a lie. He knew it was a lie, that he was just trying to convince himself that all those years growing up in the Temple meant nothing, that he could forget every tradition, every word, all the times he had been happy or sad and hadn’t been left alone.

But if he kept clinging to this child, he was going to die. The Jedi were extinct, nobody remained and what use was it if he sacrificed himself?

The best he could do was keep the two people who still knew of Caleb Dume and himself safe.

This was the truth. He had to disappear and run. All he could keep of Dume was the wit that had kept him alive so far – and the name that had been bestowed upon him.

Ibli kanan, the Force seemed to weep as the stars passed by.

4.

Ezra dropped down into the field, wheezing. Up until now, he had assumed that he had a good constitution, that all the time spent running away from law enforcement hadn’t just gifted him with quick wit but also some good gymnastic skills.

Kanan seemed content to prove him wrong. Instead of learning cool tricks with a lightsaber, Ezra spent hours running circles on a field to build up his strength. It was exhausting.

Kanan only grinned at him. His teacher tossed him a bottle of water, which Ezra accepted thankfully. He downed half the bottle in one go and, after eyeing it critically, decided to throw the remaining water over his head.

He couldn’t feel his legs anymore. They better not have another mission for at least a week. Ezra would seriously die if he had to go even one more step. He thought about just continuing to lie here for a couple days and do nothing else.

“Well done, ibli kanan,” Kanan said, absentmindedly as he began to pack their supplies back together.

Ezra frowned. “What did you just say?”

Kanan froze and hadn’t it piqued Ezra’s interest, he wouldn’t have seen how a multitude of emotions passed over his face within the blink of an eye.

“It’s something my teachers used to call me,” Kanan replied slowly.

Ezra sat up and leaned forward, hoping to encourage Kanan to talk more about them. He didn’t say much about his past, how he had gone from being a Jedi Padawan to a member of the Rebels and Ezra desperately wanted to know more. “And what does it mean?”

“Little runner.”

Translations:

“Cadeo, ibli kanan!” – Stop, little runner!

"Enoah keel jire, ibli kanan. Kan!" - You are fast, little runner. Run!

#star wars #kanan jarrus #ezra bridger #caleb dume #jedi order #conlang #dai bendu #fanfic

[spell-cleaver]

“I understand why you keep Palpatine’s brat around, but do we have to keep up this charade of bowing to the twerp when discussing important matters, Lord Vader?

Previous parts on the masterpost here!

“I understand why you keep Palpatine’s brat around, but do we have to keep up this charade of bowing to the twerp when discussing important matters, Lord Vader?”

Luke stiffened.

He didn’t look up, but he was suddenly hyperaware of the many officers clumped around the table, the old men of the Empire turning to stare at him as Ozzel’s comment rang out, unnaturally loud. He’d only murmured it, at a briefing room table where everyone was talking quietly amongst themselves after the token greeting of the Emperor to start the meeting. But he was not as subtle as he thought, when he used his past favour and subsequent seat near the head of the table to lean forwards and whisper conspiratorially with Vader, so now all that reigned was a deadly silence.

Luke fought to keep his face blank, as his father had so painstakingly taught him, and just stared unblinkingly at Ozzel with an unnervingly calm smile to set him on edge—another trick his father had preached. But his reaction paled in comparison to Vader’s.

The room cooled rapidly.

“What do you mean,” Vader boomed; Luke’s skin prickled at the vibrations that hung on the air, “charade?”

Ozzel’s eyes were wide, glancing between Luke and Vader rapidly—he was used to Palpatine, who had allowed and even encouraged insults and criticisms of Luke’s conduct at every turn, to better him. He had thought Vader would be the same.

He was wrong.

“I— my lord,” he tried, not even bothering to address Luke. “I recognise the Emperor, in all his power and"—he did look at Luke, then: looked him over, top to bottom—”stature, as the heir to Emperor Palpatine and figurehead to this great Empire. However…“

He was growing bolder now, Luke could see. Vader was just— Vader was just letting him speak, letting him run, and he was taking his cue from that, he was being inspired, and… did Vader agree? Was that why he was letting him speak?

“He is a child. His own father regularly described him as a failure"—Luke flinched—"and while I will be honoured to follow him once he is grown and capable, while I understand the importance of tradition and ceremonies and a demonstration of respect to the wider public, for now I see no reason why we should waste our valuable time in meetings—”

“Listening to treasonous drivel from the navy’s most incompetent, imbecilic officers?” Vader purred.

Ozzel trailed off.

He swallowed. “Lord Vader?”

“That is your emperor you are insulting, Captain Ozzel.”

“My lord?” He glanced around the room. Luke was ready to throw up, vanish into the floor, or burn to a crisp. “He is Emperor in name, but we all in this room know where the real power in the galaxy lies. I am simply pointing out that there is no need to waste time—”

“Indeed, Captain,” said a voice. Luke flicked his gaze to the opposite side of the table, and practically sagged with relief when he saw who it was—General Veers, who’d been patiently and assuredly helping him learn how to shoot for over a week now, standing from his chair to his full impressive height.

He leaned forwards on the table. “There are a lot of things that waste an unnecessary amount of time in meetings about what the Empire’s strategy for its expansion into the Outer Rim will be, including insulting the Emperor without cause, justification or restraint.” He gave Luke a courteous nod; Luke returned it. “This time has been difficult for all of us—and it says a lot about you, Ozzel, that you have the disrespect and inhumanity to attack the Emperor, who is most bereft, in this time.”

He glared. “So please, for the love of all that is good, shut up and let us get on with the meeting.”

“General Veers,” Ozzel shot back, somewhat… sneering. “I would think a sensible officer like you would understand my issue with this entire farce; the boy is merely a pawn, an incompetent pawn, and…” He trailed off.

He reached for his neck, twisting his head to the side…

“Vader,” Luke said, realising. He flung himself to his feet. “Vader, stop it!”

But Ozzel kept choking. Gurgling noises burst from his throat, his cheeks reddened, then purpled.

“Vader,” Luke said, “stop.”

But it was difficult for even him to breathe, here.

It was so cold he shivered under his layers of ceremonial clothing, and the Force was like daggers in his veins even as he tried to ignore it—ignore what it was telling him about Vader.

“Vader!”

Vader released him; Ozzel slumped against the table. Luke waited for him to get up, to rub his neck and whine, or scurry to the medbay, but long moments passed and he didn’t move—didn’t breathe.

Luke sagged.

Vader hadn’t listened to Luke.

He’d just let him die.

Luke lifted his gaze to Vader, who stared back at him. That mask gave away no expression whatsoever.

Luke returned to his seat, and they continued with the meeting. No one bothered to mention the corpse still on the table.

*

“What were you thinking!?” Luke shouted the moment he and Vader re-entered Luke’s quarters. Nova poked her head out of her office in the corner to see what all the yelling was about. “You killed him!”

“He was being rude and extremely disrespectful to you, Majesty, so I made an example—”

“He was accusing me of not having any control over my own government, and the fact that a member of said government went against my orders to kill him, right in front of me does nothing to disprove his point!” He scoffed and threw himself down on the sofa, kicking off his shoes so he could lie down entirely. “Everyone already thinks I’m a puppet, and you just made it worse.”

“You are not a puppet, Majesty.”

“I am, so long as you refuse to listen to me, and even if I wasn’t,” he ran his hand threw his hair, “what people think you are is all that matters.” His father’s words—in that exact phrasing—rang in his head.

Perhaps that was what made Vader insist so heatedly, “What people think you are means nothing.”

“It means everything, when I’m the Emperor of the kriffing galaxy!”

“What happened?” Nova said, coming out of her office fully to sit next to his knees on the sofa, patting his leg. He shifted over to make room for her.

“Captain Ozzel insulted me in front of everyone. Vader killed him, despite the fact I clearly and publicly asked him not to.”

Nova said to Vader, “You imbecile.”

If Vader had eyebrows, Luke was sure they would’ve shot up. “Excuse me?”

“You swore to obey Luke. That’s important, for emperors to be obeyed. You just undermined him even more effectively than Ozzel ever could.”

“He insulted and demeaned you, Majesty. What,” Vader drawled, “else was I to do?”

“What General Veers did! He actually acted with respect and decency, and tried to handle it without immediately resorting to violence! He actually knows how to stay calm, and not fly into a rampage!”

Luke didn’t know how, but he got the feeling Vader narrowed his eyes at him behind the mask. “You believe General Veers is acting as a better vassal than—”

“Yes, Vader, that’s exactly what I believe,” Luke bit back. “You should be glad: you introduced him to me, he’s your officer. It reflects well on you.” He smirked. “Or it shows you up even—”

“Luke,” Nova said. He looked up at her, the cock of her eyebrow, and calmed down. “It won’t help.”

He flinched.

Yelling never did help. Losing control never did help.

It only got him hurt even more.

Right.

He lowered his gaze. “I… apologise, Lord Vader,” he said.

Vader reached out a hand before he stopped himself. “It is nothing, Majesty,” he said finally. “You have a right to shout.”

Then he added, “General Veers is an excellent general, tactician and soldier but you should not idolise him in all things, Majesty.”

Luke blinked. “I… don’t. I was just saying—”

“His relationship with his son is reportedly not close—”

“Which father-son relationships are?” Luke scoffed. Vader stiffened at that. “I don’t know why you’re so hung up about him.”

“I am not.”

“You—” Luke sighed. “I want to go on a tour of the Empire.”

Now it was Vader’s turn to stiffen in shock.

“What.”

Confusion, anger and panic roiled, Nova’s mouth fell open as she stared at Luke, but he shrugged both of them off and sat up, pushing against the pillows to say, “I was thinking about it on the way here. I am Emperor, and I’m supposed to have some sort of control or understanding over what’s going on—in my own palace and in the galaxy. So, with the coronation having been a few weeks ago, and the interviews with the main senators all but concluded… I want to take a tour of the galaxy. Be a visible presence, a visible person, so people can’t just accuse me of being a puppet.”

“This is insane, Majesty,” Vader said heatedly. “You have already been subject to multiple assassination attempts within this very palace—how will you fare elsewhere, outside of your own stronghold?”

“Are you doubting your own ability to keep me safe, Lord Vader?”

Vader stared at him. Luke stared back.

And he realised, abruptly, that there was terror in that gaze.

So. He… he knew the answer to that, then.

“I want to go,” he reiterated, no gentler than before. “I want to go, and see the galaxy the way I was before the Rebel attack on my life and my father’s death.”

“Would you like to be attacked the way you were?”

“Shut up,” Nova said. Vader swivelled his head to look at her, betrayed. “Luke’s right. He needs to get out of this palace—he needs to make an impression, rather than living in his father’s shadow for years.”

They exchanged a heavy look. Luke had no idea what that was about.

“Very well,” Vader conceded eventually. “I will… make the preparations. Where were you thinking of going, Majesty?”

Luke smiled. “It’s a bit unconventional, all the way out in the Mid Rim, but… Naboo might be a good place to start.”

Nova clapped. “That’s perfect—your father’s homeworld, sends all sorts of good messages—”

“And your birth mother’s homeworld,” Vader cut in pointedly.

Nova grinned. “Yes! And there’s something I need to show you, Luke—a house, where your parents got married…”

Vader… tensed up, suspiciously.

“No,” he said. “We will be on a tight schedule, we cannot stay for long—and for security reasons, we will have to stay in Theed.”

Nova snorted. “I’m sure.”

Vader glared.

But Luke just smiled. It was something.

It was something.

“Alright,” he said. “When do we leave?”

Send me the first sentence of a scene from this AU and I’ll continue it!

Beginning | Previous | Next

#luke palpatine #luke skywalker #darth vader #kendal ozzel #maximilian veers #sabé #my writing #random words on a page

[calliecat93]

Well didn’t get this done before Chapter Five came out, but I’m still MUCH more caught up than I had been. Good thing they’re going on a six week break here soon since that’ll not only let me catch my barrings... but let my soul have a break, GOOD GOD THESE PAST TWO CHAPTERS HIT HARD!As far this specific chapter goes... boy I did not expect me to shock me as much as it did. So w\let’s not waste anymore time and jump right into it.

Overview

Robyn is recalling a story about Joanna in prison, but neither Jaques or Qrow are all that into. But she does manage to get Qrow to finally smile, as well as notice him still holding Clover’s badge. She apologizes for what happened, which lets Qrow vent about the entire fiasco and how for the first time in so long, it felt like he had made a connection without having to fear his Semblance ruining it. Robyn... actually understands, herself having been ostracized due to her lie detecting Semblance making people fear her revealing their secrets. Harriet and Marrow enter, throwing Watts ack into his cell. Harriet doesn’t believe Qrow declaring his innocence, even when Robyn offers to use her Semblance. Robyn also calls Harriet out on essentially blaming others and not caring about the truth since it’s easier for her to not accept her own blame. Before Harriet can act, Marrow stops her and the speedster storms off/

Back in the tundra, JYR are still giving chase to The Hound, Jaune even launching Ren at it. It doesn’t work and The Hound even calls for backup, summoning more Grimm. It leads to a giant chase sequence, including a new song that IDT has a title yet, but it is dark as Hell. The chase ends with two of the bikes being destroyed, Yang and Jaune almost falling over a cliff until Ren uses his grappling features to save them, and the three are forced to watch as The Hound escapes with Oscar in it’s clutches. Back up in Atlas, RWBNM have gone to, surprisingly, the Schnee Manor to lay low and tend to Nora. Whitley is less than pleased, especially with what Weiss did not even 24 hours ago in-show, but Weiss makes it clear that they’re not leaving and she sends him to his room. As Weiss and May tend to Nora, Blake sees Ruby worried about the others. She suggests that Ruby can still call Yang... but there’s one problem, Ruby already did.

JYR are out of signal range, forcing them to make their way back to Mantle on-foot. During the trek however, Ren’s closed up attitude is flaring up, which eventually causes Yang to get on his case. Ren i9s frustrated due to not just losing Oscar, but everything that has happened. Losing the Relics, Ironwood’s betrayal, the current Grimm attack with Salem just outside the doorstep. Even with yang pointing out their accomplishments and admitting that they have made mistakes but still pulled through, Ren’s anger flares as he points out that they are WAY in over their heads. Jaune tries to calm them both down, but Ren continues to point to how Ruby is leading them despite still being a kid, he himself is an orphan form the middle of nowhere, and the biggest shock is him getting after Jaune for forging his way into Beacon. This shocks everyone, even Ren himself, but Jaune simply says that he’s getting out of the cold and walks on. Yang asks if Ren just wats to push everyone away before following, leaving Ren shocked and upset.

Meanwhile... oh boy, this scene. Oscar wakes up and standing right across from him is Salem. She addresses Ozma and how long it’s been since she’s seen him and... yeah it’s pretty unsettling. Oscar tries to act like Oz, but Salem sees right through it and tries to get Oscar to give her answers. He genuinely doesn’t know where the Beacon Relic is, so Salem tries to get the password to the Lamp out. When he tries to use the ‘out of questions’ ploy... Salem uses her magic to... magically torture him... yeah it’s... rough. Oscar still doesn’t talk, so Salem brings out Hazel... you know, the guy who hayes Oz probably more than anyone and has sworn to kill him? Yeah...

Cinder meets with Salem, taken back by The Hound which Salem calls an experiment. Cinder again tries to convince her to let her go after Penny, but Salem again orders her to stay put. Cinder agrees... well, verbally anyways. But she knows that the heroes are likely going to still try and launch Amity, so sh decides to go for the Maiden Power anyways. Neo is less than thrilled with this plan, but Cinder has another person willing to help her: Emerald.

Back in the tundra, JYR have found shelter for the night and Jaune admits that Ren is correct about how he cheated his way into Beacon. But he’s since realized that he was above his mistake and tries to convince Ren to not push them out, knowing fully well how all that it does is hurt you more. If it did any good, Ren doesn’t show it as he goes to sit outside. Yang has found a part to fix the bike and also assures Jaune that she knows that he worked hard to get to where he is now. She starts working on the part before asking Jaune if ‘she’ thinks any less of her. Jaune, assuming that she means Ruby, assures her that they’re sisters and will be fine... but Yang was talking about a certain cat girl. Our episode ends here... but not before showing us the ice nearby beginning to crack... thanks a lot CRWBY!

Review

Like I said in the intro, I didn’t expect this chapter to shock me like it did. Did I expect intensity? Of course, especially after the last chapter? Did I expect what we got? Nope, but it was perfect!

Let’s talk about Ren first. Ever since last volume, it’s been clear that he’s been unraveling. He wasn’t engaging in Nora’s antics anymore, was more closed up than usual, seemed in agreement with Ironwood at one point, and of course his mini-breakdown in the finale Not even Nora and him kissing helped, heck considering what happened after it only seemed to make him worse. Even now he’s at serious odds with Nora for the first time since childhood, something that is clearly bothering him despite him keeping it to the chest. He’s trying to keep his focus on his duty, but with everything going more and more wrong, the facade is not only shattering, but the cracks are causing him to push those close to him away.

His argument with Yang was a tense moment. I like it though. Not only for more unique character dynamics, but out of every character Yang will lay it out as it is. If Ren’s going to have an attitude problem, then she will call it out and not give a damn about the reason why. Since Nora can’t get though to him, the harsher approach is kind of the only thing left. Ren’s breakdown was hard to watch... and he is right to an extent. They are in over their heads. Their decision, even if the right one morally, is creating more problems and endanger more lives. Ruby is still a kid and she’s placed far too much on herself. I think he is underestimating himself and the others about not being ready, but his concerns are completely understandable and he has some good, if harsh, points.

But then he brings up Jaune cheating his way into beacon. Yeah, been a while since that came up, huh? I actually gasped when that came up. While Ren clearly didn’t mean for that to come out, the fact that he did when pointing out that they’re way over their heads does display at least some doubts he has about his leader. JNR have grown close over the past few volumes, Ren and Nora essentially considering Jaune family by the time of Volume 6. So hearing this was hard, especially since all that Jaune was doing was trying to calm him and Yang down.

I do, however, like how Jaune reacted. Back in the early volumes, he likely would have taken it as a blow to his confidence and gotten huffy about it. Now? While the blow clearly stung, he keeps himself in check and keeps focus on finding shelter. Then once there, he outright admits that Ren’s right and tries to comfort him. He tries to advise him on opening up and how closing yourself off doesn’t help. Considering that he tried this both in V1 when we found out how he cheated and after Pyrrha died and only getting better when he allowed others to help, he absolutely knows how Ren feels. But the fat that he handled this so maturely and tried to help his friend instead of get angsty about it shows how much he’s grown. It’s really nice to see.

Now let’s talk about Weiss and Whitley. So this got some... mixed reception. Some were upset about Weiss pointing her weapon and Whitley and her general harsh behavior towards him this chapter. Now I do understand the first part since I was similarly annoyed at Yang for threatening Qrow in Volume Six when all that he was trying to do was be reasonable about the Lamp. It was likely too harsh, but in farness Weis sis not only trying to help save the kingdom, but one of her teammates is in critical condition and she has no time for Whitley to be angry at her. The Manor is the safest place at the moment, and she needs to get Nora care now. Not saying it’s a justification, but it isn’t her being mean for the sake of it either.

But even so... guys I’m sorry, but do you seriously expect Weiss to suddenly forgive and coddle Whitley this soon? After years of him belittling her and rubbing his success in her face while she was punished, not to mention seeming more concerned about the family reputation than the current conflict? I’m sorry , but it’s not that simple. Yes, Whitley is also a victim who was manipulated and groomed by his father and unlike Weiss, he was never able to get a proper support system or have any family to help like how Weiss had Winter. I do feel bad for him, and I do think that Weiss will take her mother’s words form the last volume and will help Whitley later in the volume. But they’ve both hurt each other. Whitley by treating Weiss badly, and Weiss not giving him support like she was given. They’re both victims AND hurt each other. Some try to paint it as one is problematic and the other is an innocent child, and that’s simply untrue. They’re only going to realize that if and when they talk out their problems with each other out, it’s just a matter of when it’ll be. It takes time to mend these kinds of things, sadly.

Next is the villains scene... ho boy. So I’m gonna wait on Cinder for the next chapter, but her ignoring Salem in favor of power isn’t a shock at all. No, let’s discuss Oscar. Just... this poor, poor kid. He’s trying to be brave, but seeing him get tortured and especially the screaming?! Aaron Dismuke, why do this to me you jerk?! I do admire him for trying it imitate Oz and keep his composure, but it was just so... brutal to watch. Salem doing it so calmly and being perfectly willing to wait for the answers since she can just make Oscar suffer is... well, evil. And don’t think I missed her with the shadow versions of her daughters. Some say that humanizes her, but since she remorsefully tortured a child and sicked an emotionally unstable brute to physically harm him without a care in the world... no. It didn’t excuse Ironwood, and it sure as Hell isn’t excusing Salem. Tis just makes her all the more terrifying.

Okay... last thing is that scene at the end. The Bumblebee implication scene. So... I won’t lie it did annoy me at first. Before anyone says anything, it was NOT because of hating the ship or anything stupid like that. I’m not a huge Bumblebee fan, but anyone who keeps saying there’s nothing there at this point is living in denial. It’s happening people and since at least Volume 6, I think they’ve been doing it pretty well. My issue is mainly just because... we’ve had plenty of Bumblebee content. Volume 7 had them together in pretty much every scene, and I just don’t like having a pair of characters limited like that. I had the same issue with Renora, especially in Volumes 1-3, and with shipping in general. The main reason though is that I want there to be some more focus on Ruby and Yang because I feel like it’s been a long time and that there is a genuine conflict between them that can bring some interesting things for both. I’m not saying they need to be at each other’s throats, but siblings DO argue and no, it doesn’t always get easily resolved and I am speaking form experience here. To be fair it could happen later and Ruby herself hasn’t been pondering on it that much either. Heck Blake seemed more concerned about it than either of them have. But I would like to see more than just the one pair that I’ve already seen focused on plenty of times because it’s limiting. That’s just a personal thing though and I’ve always enjoyed sibling stuff more than romance, so yeah just a me thing.

That being said, those saying that Yang doesn’t care about Ruby need to calm down. No, that is NO the case. Did we forget Yang trying to console a broke Ruby despite her own grief just last volume? Mere hours ago in-show at that? Despite what I said above and while she’s clearly concerned after Ruby’s recent choices, Yang still loves and ultimately trusts her sister. She never said that she didn’t think that Ruby would fail or was wasting her time, she just felt like Mantle needed them more and the consequences to trying were too much. Heck this is a spoiler, but considering her reaction in the next chapter, it only reinforces that belief. At least with Blake, this is the first time they’ve willingly split apart and Yang clearly still has some abandonment issues and concerns. Plus... yeah, it’s natural when you have feelings for someone to worry if they made a bad choice that may make them doubt them. Blake won’t, but it’s understandable. Heck, Blake was clearly concerned about Yang when trying to get Ruby to call. I think she was trying to comfort Ruby as well with the suggestion, but it was still pretty evident... also Ruby and Blake interaction, yay! Still yeah guys, let’s just... chill a little bit and see what more comes of anything.

Okay, got that out of my system, and I apologize if it came across wrong. Whatever annoyance I had I’m over anyways, especially after the recent chapter. Anyways, the chapter had so much good. Plus we not only had a badass chase sequence, but a new song! Again, IDK the title, but it was another banger for sure. The opening scene with row and Robyn bonding and Robyn calling out Harriet was great. Marrow’s subtle expressions showing how not okay he is, and I’m seriously hoping that he may be the one to free the others. It would be a really good move for his character in him deciding that being lawful doesn’t equal the right thing, and making it right especially considering his interaction with Robyn last volume. The animation was good with the backgrounds looking fantastic, the pacing has been on fire, and of course that ominous ending. God they’re trying to keep us on edge, and I love it!

Chapter Stats

Favorite Character: Lie Ren Favorite Scene: Ren losing it in the tundra Least Favorite Scene: Probably the wrong term, but seeing Oscar be tortured while well done was hard. Favorite Voice Actor: Neath Oum (Ren Favorite Animation: JYR chasing The Hound Rating: 9.9/10

Final Thoughts

This was fantastic, especially in the character department. I haven’t been this shocked in a good while. It hurt no doubt, but the writing and voice performances were so well done. Seriously, this is probably Neath’s best performance to date. Add in the great animation, the tone being on point, and the set-ups with the Schnee Manor and cracking ice and the fact that this is only Chapter Four is crazy. But it’s only going to get crazier people... oh so, so much crazier. Only one review to go until I’m back to being caught up... my poor heart XD

#rwby #rwby8 #rwby spoilers #rwby reviews #rwby musings #callie reviews

[julienschuester]

THIS USED TO BE MY PLAYGROUND

WHO: @ivystjamess​ & julien schuester WHERE: ivy’s locker @ wmhs WHEN: monday, november 23, after 4th period WHAT: ivy and julien have a confrontation about their disagreement in the ND groupchat regarding serenity and link’s slushie-gate. 

JULIEN: Julien was not an angry person. He was always looking on the bright side—always searching for a silver lining. Unfortunately for him, he was learning that sometimes? There was no silver lining. As he sat in physics class, hiding his cellphone in the pages of his text book to aggressively text in the new directions group chat, he felt an unfamiliar rage bubbling in the pit of his stomach. He didn’t like being upset or mad, but here he was, red in the face with steam nearly blowing out of his ears in response to what he was reading. How could Link think what he did to Serenity was right? How could Ivy of all people agree? She was better than this and it was driving Julien crazy to see her be so…stubborn! And mean! He just didn’t get it. No matter how he looked at the situation, her response just wasn’t adding up. Julien didn’t mean to let his emotions get the best of him, but after he called Ivy a literal republican, he knew it was in his best interest to put his phone away. They weren’t going to agree over text, so he’d just have to find her after class. He locked his phone, slipped it into his pocket, and watched the clock for the rest of fourth period while his knees shook anxiously.

Only seventeen more minutes…sixteen…fifteen. Time was moving at a glacial place but finally, after what felt like hours, the bell rang and Julien nearly jumped out of his seat. With his backpack now fastened over his shoulders, he booked it straight to Ivy’s locker. If she was really going to skip her next class, she’d be making a stop there anyway to ditch her books. “Ivy,” he called out when he saw her, taking a deep breath before marching towards her with furrowed brows, “what’s going on with you? Why were you being so…” this was hard…Julien wasn’t the type to call people out, especially not Ivy, so words escaped him. “You know what you were doing,” he settled on, “so my question is why? You’re better than this and you don’t actually believe that stuff right? I mean, you can’t. And—“ he was stuttering and talking way too fast, shaking his head and moving his hands way too much, “you’re just being…” a groan, “kind of an asshole.” Crap. “I’m sorry—not an asshole, but…” well, actually, that was what he meant, “just…mean.”

IVY: Ivy was an angry person, she wasn't the type to go down screeching and swinging, but she was an angry person. Her anger was like a turtle's shell. Fused to the heart and the ribs and the backbone of her most tender and intense feelings of being hurt. Today, this cold anger, masking the aching of her heart had chosen Julien as it's victim. The moment he approached her at her locker she was also rearing to go. At the end of the day, Julien was as sweet as could be. Sometimes blindly. Ivy was....not. She could handle disagreements in the group chat between the two of them, she could even handle being called a bitch with Julien nowhere in sight to defend her, that was expected from him at this point. She didn't need him to be her knight in shining armor no matter how desperately she wanted him to be. Ivy could care less about Link slushying Serenity and she could care less about Julien trying to be all righteous about it. But he had promised her that he was going to start standing with her and at her side. Where the hell was that energy today? It caused the tips of her ears to flush red and a scowl to plaster on her face as Julien arrived at her locker. Part of her didn't even want to bother hearing him out. She had coffee to catch and she could already foresee this conversation ending with one or both of them more hurt than they already were.

As he began this flustered ramble, it dawned on Ivy she'd never really seen him this level of angry or exasperated or whatever it was. It only took her slightly aback, but for this particular situation, her own feelings took precedence over her love. She stood stubborn and firm with her arms crossed silently. (With the exception of greeting Julien by slamming her locker and issuing a 'Hello, liar.') Ivy half tried to hear him out through his stammering and emotive gestures, but hearing Julien call her an asshole and mean might as well have sealed the deal that there would be no productivity from this conversation. He was supposed to be the exception, he wasn't supposed to see her like that, and if it weren't for a fortunately timed rubbing of her lips together she probably would've yelped in actual pain. It hurt, so in turn, Ivy retaliated in defensive indignation. "God Julien, like, why does it even matter to you? It's just a slushie." she rolled her eyes as she pulled her folded arms tighter into herself. Rather than really answering him, she was quick to fire questions back in his direction, "I was acting that way because it was how i felt." she explained simply. "I'm sorry you like, don't like that, but I'm not just going to like, change who I am to make it easier for you to stand up for me or whatever." a pause, "Which you like, totally lied to me about, by the way. Liar."

JULIEN: “Just a slushie?” Julien retorted in an almost mocking tone. A comment like that was just rich coming from Ivy, who had never been on the receiving end of a slushie in her life. “You don’t know what it feels like Ivy,” he insisted, his open (albeit flailing) arms acting as an opposite for her crossed ones, “that’s easy for you to say when no one’s ever thrown a slushie on your face.” If Julien was a little more perceptive and his judgment hadn’t been clouded by his anger in the moment, he probably would’ve been able to pick up on the fact that these were not the ideal conditions to have this conversation. There were people bustling around them, they were in the middle of a hallway, and Ivy was getting more upset by the second. But alas. “You’re basically saying that I deserved it and stuff when I got slushied,” he explained, hoping putting the situation in that perspective would make something click for her.

Ivy’s apology didn’t sound much like an apology at all. Julien stared at her in disbelief, his brows knit together in a look of concern as his mouth hung open. What was happening right now? “Stop calling me a liar,” he stammered, shaking his head as he squeezed his eyes shut to think, “I didn’t lie about anything. You...you were the one who called me dramatic in the group chat and started like challenging everything I was saying! You said mean stuff about my family!” Julien felt like he was being crazy. How could they have gotten such different reads on that situation? “I want to stand up for you and all that stuff...” unfortunately there was a— “but sometimes you make it impossible. I’m not some JV cheerio you can boss around. I’m your boyfriend and we’re supposed to be a team in there.” Julien took a second to take a full breath, briefly pulling off his hat and scratching his head before placing it loosely back over his hair. He’d never lost his cool like this—especially not at Ivy. Not since they were kids, anyway. He visibly softened before he started speaking again. “What’s gotten into you lately, huh? Is everything okay? Is something wrong?” his anger had quickly flipped to genuine worry, “I know you’re tough and you don’t take any crap from anyone. I love that about you.” A long pause. “But these days it feels like...you’re mean for no reason and stuff.”

IVY: Although Ivy was well acquainted with harsher tones than the one Julien was using with her right now, something about his frustrated comments stung more than any constructive criticism her father could dole out or being called a bitch one too many times during the school day. But quick to strike back, Ivy scoffed gesturing erratically with her head. "I never said Serenity deserved it, stop like putting words in my mouth!" her and Julien didn't have to see eye to eye. Fine. Ivy was no stranger to relationships where things were a little bit of an uphill battle. Never did she want to reach that point with Julien, but here they were, feeling miles apart while only being mere inches in distance. "And you're not Serenity, so like, stop acting like it's the same because it's not. You're my boyfriend and I love you and I grew up with you so like when you got slushied it was a totally different situation." Ivy ranted quickly, only to let out a soft breath at the end of her sentence. Realizing, there were other more pressing comments to address, she refocused her attention.

While there wasn't really a valid way to defend calling him a liar or dramatic, she was quick to pick out Julien taking issue with her comment about his family. That was the comment that finally got Ivy to uncross her arms and gesture wildly as she dismissively scoffed. "Yeah, Julien, I was just like so mean, I said your family is really good at like making people feel good about themselves, totally evil of me." she attempted to combat as if the context of her original comment wasn't about that behavior not always being beneficial. It seemed the longer Julien went on, the more piercing his comments were. By no means were they as harsh or as mean, but it was new territory for both of them. Julien was typically the one who saw the good in all of Ivy's bad, even when they bickered, they took each other's sides, they knew each other, and were always effortlessly on the same page. It never had to be a battle with Julien...until now.

Both sadness and fear sweltered in the deepest of layers of her heart, which unsurprisingly manifested in a bitter, "You couldn't like, stand up for a broom,Julien. So don't make this about me! If you hate how i act so much then like why are you even dating me?" she defended, then instantly recoiled at the realization of how harsh the comment was. Ivy was just so hurt, so angry, she couldn't stop the words popping into her brain from flying out of her mouth.  To make matters worse, Julien quickly subbed in concern for frustration, which left Ivy quietly chewing on the inside of her cheek and looking at her shoes planted firmly over scuffed linoleum floors. As she reflected on the questions Julien tossed in her direction, she found herself left more confused than with answers she could give him. Was she okay? She liked to think so...but something about answering yes with her whole chest felt....dishonest. Instead, all she managed to issue was a quiet, "I love you." through her refusal to make eye contact. She just wanted him to know. After a moment of quiet and a deep sigh, she looked up at him, anger and resignation lingering in her gaze. All she could think of as she looked at Julien was how she needed to get out of here before she either caved for those sad brown eyes of his, or miraculously said something even harsher. "Look, I should like, probably get headed to coffee, Jules. I'll see you after school?"

JULIEN: “You said Link probably had a good reason,” he rebutted with wide eyes and a slack jaw, “isn’t that like kind of like saying she deserves it or something?” Julien was visibly frustrated. He wasn’t putting words in her mouth and stuff like she was saying! How couldn’t she see that? He was not the most eloquent person. He knew that. Sure, at times he liked to believe he was, especially since Dan and his dad were great at speeches and pep talks…but he crumbled under pressure. And this situation? It felt like a lot of pressure. Julien took a deep breath and held it as Ivy spoke, lips pressed into a tight line and eyes zoned in on his tiny but rage-filled girlfriend. As crappy as this situation was and as upset as they both were, he wasn’t going to let her ‘I love you’ go unaddressed so he quickly replied to it with a, “well, I love you too. A lot. But it’s really not that different, Legs.”

While Julien had somehow managed to somewhat hold his own in this argument with Ivy, he started visibly wilting when she dismissed what he was saying and met his words with venom. “I—“ he stammered, shaking his head confusedly, “you’re twisting the situation.” His words came out like a whine and lacked any real conviction. He could see Ivy getting angrier with him in the way her eyes switched from icy to icier and her tone from kind of mean to straight up harsh. You couldn't like, stand up for a broom, Julien. So don't make this about me! If you hate how I act so much then like why are you even dating me? Julien visibly deflated and stared at Ivy with slightly parted lips as he unclenched his jaw and unknit his brows. “What does that even mean?” he asked quietly, not sure what a broomstick had to do with anything, “and how could you ask me that?”

Her refusal to meet his gaze made him feel uneasy. “Ivy,” he started, this time softer as he almost reached for her, but she interrupted his motion with an ‘I love you.’ He nodded vaguely as he stared down at her. “I know,” he said simply, “I love you too.” The tense energy between them hadn’t dissipated but he hoped that maybe after exchanging those words, she’d look at him and they’d be able to move past this. She’d look at him and know that the only reason they were having this fight was because Julien loved her. He thought she was awesome, the best there was, but how could other people get a glimpse of that when she was so concerned with being brutally honest or winning or whatever? It didn’t make sense to him. Why was a trophy and an archaic tactic more important than some innocent girl’s feelings to Ivy? “I just don’t g—“ but Julien didn’t get to finish that thought. When Ivy looked up at him, he didn’t see the warmth he was hoping for. “Oh,” he said as she got ready to leave him alone at her locker, “uh—okay. Okay, yeah, sure.” He wanted to say more, to tell her to stay, but something held him back. As she turned on one heel and didn’t turn back, all the questions about Davis and Vocal Adrenaline and cheating swirled in his head. He’d get around to them later. Maybe.

AND SCENE.

#para #p: ivy #ivy #discord para #this used to be my playground

[f-a-n-d-o-o-m]

The rest of the week (part 1)

So, I know I’m a bit late to the Chameleon-Salt/fix-it party, but I’ve been working on this for a while and have a few thousand words on it. I wasn’t planning to publish it, but I figured that some feedback could be good!

I’m really nervous, this is my first time posting fanfic for a long time, and I would love some feedback. I have quite a lot of it written out, so part 2 should be out soon. I don’t know how long it’s going to end up being.

I think I took inspiration from a lot of other fics for this, so if you think it’s too similar to a different fic (whether it’s your own or not) please let me know, so I can tag the person where the original idea came from. I didn’t mean to copy their ideas, but sometimes I read a fic an the idea stays in my head but not where the idea came from...

One final question I have is how long I should make each part? Like I said, I have a few thousand words written but I don’t know how long I should make each part, as I will not be posting them all at once.

Anyway, if you do read this fic, thankyou! Pleas leave some constructive criticism, I’d love to improve my writing.

:)

-Amarok

“Are you going to tell everyone?” Marinette froze, and turned to the boy standing next to her.

“Course I am! Lila is-“

“A liar. Yes, I know,” Marinette’s hands dropped. What? “But do you really think exposing her will make things better? If you humiliate her she’ll just be hurt more. Making a bad guy suffer will never turn them into a good guy,” Adrien continued.

“Ladybug and I are like two peas in a pod.” Lila smiled.

“So we just stand by and let her lie?” Marinette bit her lip. That didn’t seem right.

“As long as you and I both know the truth, does it really matter?”

Marinette opened her mouth, and paused. She’d tried so hard to convince her friends that Lila was lying. She’d brought proof, and evidence, and made it so clear. But what was it Alya thought? She was being jealous. Nobody believed her, but they were happy to take Lila’s word for it.

Her hands clenched, then fell. Maybe Adrien was right. Maybe she should back down. ‘There’s nothing you can do about it anyway.’ Lila’s words echoed back through her head. Marinette’s eyes narrowed.

“Yes!”

The force of her words took Adrien by surprise. He quickly turned to her.

“Marinette?”

“Alya posted the interview on her blog! Nino thinks she’s going to help bring her music into the world! If we know she’s lying and just do nothing, then we’re letting her take advantage of them!”

Adrien was silent.

“Maybe you’re right. Confronting her isn’t going to do anything. But I’m Alya’s best friend. I’m not letting Lila take advantage of her.”

-

When the bell rang to end the day, Alya, Nino, and Marinette all hurried out the door. “Alya! Come with me to the bathroom for a moment?” Marinette called. She felt nervous about taking on a group of people, after the class kept on knocking her down. She’d start with her best friend. Besides, more than anyone, she knew she could trust her bestie, right?

“Uh, sure Marinette. Can you wait Nino?” At her boyfriend’s nod, Alya followed Marinette into the bathroom.

The pigtailed girl checked that they were alone, then spun around to face Alya. “Alya, I really need to tell you something,” She said, automatically holding the other girl’s hands.

Alya smirked. “What,” She grinned, leaning in. “Did Adrien say your name while at the back of the classroom?”

Marinette’s face flushed pink. She giggled, and swatted her friend. Alya started laughing too. It was just how things were supposed to be. “No…” The smile slowly fell from Marinette’s face, as she remembered how Adrien was so willing to back down from confrontation.

Alya didn’t seem to notice. “Sure, girl.”

“No, Alya, it’s not Adrien. It’s Lila.”

That shut up the reporter. Her eyes narrowed. “Lila? Marinette-“

“Alya! She’s lying, I have so much proof! Like how on Hero’s Day there was an illusion? Of Ladybug and Chat fighting? Who do we know who makes illusions in their akumatised form? Lila! And Hawkmoth was only returning Akumas to their previous form!”

“Lila wasn’t in Paris at the time!”

Marinette is taken aback by Alya’s raised voice. “Exactly! So she must have been lying.”

“Marinette, you’re being ridiculous-“

“Her right ear had tinnitus, then her left ear?”

“What are you talking about?”

“Her right ear had tinnitus, so she had to sit in the front, then Ladybug brought an earplug for her left ear?”

“You’re just getting mixed up.”

“These aren’t even the big ones! The wrist that she hurt, but then she was able to catch a napkin?”

“She explained that she saw someone lose their eye on a napkin!”
 Marinette blinked at her friend. This wasn’t how she expected this to go.

“It. Was. A. Napkin.” Marinette made sharp movements with her hands to underline her point. “And Max was wearing glasses!” Great, now she was almost shouting too.

“It probably happened on reflex.”

“Jagged Stone never had a kitten!”

“He did, before he had a crocodile!”

“No, he didn’t! He said in an interview that he would never have a kitt-“

“ENOUGH MARINETTE!”

Marinette froze, her mouth open. Shock from her best friend basically screaming- well, maybe that was a bit dramatic, but it was loud and they were so close (both physically and as friends) it seemed even louder- made tears leak to her eyes. Alya looked at them and sighed.

“Sorry girl. I just… You’ve been so rude to Lila since day one, and… Well, it’s clear that it’s just because it’s Adrien. She’s been nothing but nice to you, and-“

“Nothing but nice to me?”

Marinette was seething.

“Nothing but nice to me? Alya, she threatened me, today!”

Alya just looked at her like she was a naïve baby.

“Marinette-“

“She said that she’d take away all my friends.” There was no shouting now, just speaking, plain and simple. No emotions, just facts.

“Now you’re the one making things up,” Alya said. She said it simply, as though she didn’t realise that those seven words grabbed Marinette’s soul, tore it up, then let it flutter to the ground.

The tears building up in her blue eyes overflowed, and slipped down her cheeks. Alya’s eyes filled with pity, and she reached her hand out to Marinette, who slapped it away.

“You said that I didn’t think you’d leave your BFF sitting all by herself, did you? Well, actually I did. And maybe you aren’t making me sit alone, but you’re making me stand alone. It’s not even like I’m asking you to ‘just trust me’. I am giving you so much proof as to what I’m saying. You’re just choosing Lila’s lies, over what I’m saying. You are choosing to ignore what I am saying in order to benefit yourself. You are choosing Lila, over me. Your best friend.” Somehow, her voice wasn’t wavering despite the tears. “Well, fine. You choose Lila. But don’t expect me to choose you.”

With that Marinette Dupain-Cheng left Alya standing alone in the bathroom.

-

Alya gripped her phone tightly, then took a deep breath. Marinette was just being ridiculous. She’d get over it.

Those words calmed her. Her negative emotions slowly dissipated.

Nino looked at her as she walked out the bathroom. “Are you okay? Marinette looked really upset just now.”

“Yeah, I’m fine. Marinette will be too, she just got a bit jealous.”

Nino seemed unconvinced, so Alya leant in. “It was Adrien.” Understanding washed over his face.

“She’ll be better by tomorrow then,” He said.

“That’s what I said, but she went all ‘I guess we can never be friends’,” Alya laughed. Nino chuckled slightly.

“Wow, really? Over Adrien?”

“Well…” Alya recunted what Marinette had said.

“She really thought Lila was lying about everything?”

“Well, I think she wanted Lila to be lying. You know, to make her less of a threat to Adrien.”

Nino shook his head. “Yeah, I thought that. Geez, I never realised Marinette could be so selfish.”

-

‘You’re our everyday Ladybug.’

‘If you humiliate her you’ll just be hurt more.’

But what about me Adrien? Don’t my feelings matter?

Maybe I don’t want every single one of my friends to betray me?

That made her freeze, right outside the bakery doors. She’d run home, and the wind had dried her tears but her eyes were still red.

Every single friend?

The image of all her classmates turning to glare at her as Lila pulled her ‘I can sit at the back’ sob-story made her heart sting.

Every single friend?

‘You really thought I’d make you sit by yourself?’

Every single friend?

‘Now you’re just making things up.’

Even her best friend?

‘Soon you won’t have any friends left at all’

Lila had achieved her goal. Why should Marinette keep trying? She had fought so hard to prove to her friends, but they hadn’t listened to her. This wasn’t a matter of what was true. This was all down to who they trusted more. And after all this time, she had been discarded like some scrap fabric, for Lila. All the things she had done for them, they forgot as soon as they saw something shiny and new.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw a flutter of wings. She yelped and threw herself backwards, staring at the black butterfly edging towards her.

She kept it in her sights as she backed around the corner, then down an alley. She didn’t even talk to Tikki, just mumbled ‘Spots on’. When the butterfly rounded the corner, she instantly caught it in her Yoyo.

“That could have been a disaster.” She mumbled to herself. Her finger hovered over her Yoyo, ready to set the butterfly free, but it hesitated.

Her best friends had almost let her be akumatised.

The realisation was shocking. Alya, Nino, Rose, Juleka, Ivan, Mylène, Max, Alix, Nathaniel, Kim, Sabrina. They’d all almost let her be akumatised again.

She spun her Yoyo around her head, and swung up to the top of the building, then continued to the Eiffel tower.

Chat must have seen her swing by, because a few minutes after she made it to the top, her partner joined her.

“Are you patrolling early, M’Lady?”

“Hey Kitty,” Seeing her partner made her smile. Lila couldn’t take away Chat Noir.

Chat must have caught her mood, because he went quiet (for once). He joined her from where she was leaning against a railing, and for a good five minutes, neither of them said anything.

“Are you okay, Ladybug?”

Ladybug turned to Chat and smiled. “I… I’m better, I think,” She admitted. She didn’t want to lie. “It’s just… I nearly got akumatised.”

Chat went stiff next to her. “What?” He breathed. “Why?”

“It was just…” The words ‘nothing really’ died on her lips. No lies. It was a big deal. “Some people who I thought were my friends without the mask on, made me feel…”

She didn’t really know what she should say, and the other hero seemed to get that. He reached out and put a hand on hers. It wasn’t forced, like so many of the Chat’s movements around her felt, and seemed natural. Ladybug finally looked up to his eyes.

“It seems like you need to get some better friends,” He said.

Ladybug paused. Better friends? “I don’t really know many other people… I mean, I know a lot of people, but they all were part of what made me nearly get akumatised.”

“All of them?”

Briefly, Ladybug’s thoughts moved to Luka, but then they went to Chat Noir.

“Not you.”

Surprise flickered in the Chat’s eyes. “No- I didn’t mean me- I meant- I was just surprised-“

“I know Chat.”

“No- I mean, I wasn’t trying to flirt with you. I just thought that you would have so many amazing friends, because you’re the kind of person everyone would like.”

“Yeah, well. I sort of was the middle ground between all the friends. They might have ended up becoming friends without me, but we all became one huge friendship group, so I don’t exactly have a second one to turn to.”

“Well…” There was another moment of silence. “I don’t need you to tell me what happened, but is there any way to explain to them?”

“It was me trying to explain what happened that made them all so mad,” Tears were welling up in her eyes again, and Chat’s heart broke to see the strong hero in front of him reduced to crying. Whoever could do such an awful thing didn’t deserve his Lady.

Without even thinking about it, he wrapped his arms around the bug. She froze for a moment, then hugged him back. They stood there for a minute, just being with each other.

“I’ll never betray you, Ladybug. I promise.”

Ladybug smiled at his words.

When they pulled away, Ladybug pulled out her Yoyo. “I think you’re right Kitty. I need to find myself some new friends. Maybe… I should think about myself.”

She tapped the Yoyo, and the white butterfly broke free. It fluttered out, and hovered by her face for a moment, then flitted away, across the building of Paris. The two watched it go.

Because more than anyone, Ladybug knew she could trust her Chat Noir.

-

“Mum? Dad? I wa- We need to talk,” Marinette put her fork down. Her parents turned to her from their meal.

“What is it?”

“I’d like to change schools.”

#miraculous ladybug #chameleon salt #miraculous salt #alya salt #sad marinette #crying #lots of crying #amarok here #amarok's writing #:)

[royallyprincesslilly]

Title: Love, Maybe? {5}

Chris Evans X Reader Vixen Giovanni

Chapter Warning: Cursing, Plot, Time Jump

Word Count: 3.2K

Note: Bold Italics are Chris’ inner thoughts. Italics are Vixen’s inner thoughts

**Slightly Edited/Proofread**

**Interactive**

Thank you guys for reading!!!! If you enjoyed this please LIKE, COMMENT, REBLOG. 😊 ❤️ ❤️

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter 5: Time Flies

-Two ½ Years Later-

 -Chris-

 “We have Chris Evans here with us for a little more time. He is our Captain America. He will be seen in Avengers: Infinity War and then Avengers: Endgame. We are very excited to see both movies; Captain America is a fan favorite.”

     He smiled as the audience erupted with applause.

     “Chris, you’ve played the Captain for several years. Are you looking forward to playing anything else?”

     “Well, I’m actually looking forward to getting behind the camera directing, producing,” he explained.

     “What about a family? Do you see yourself with a family?”

 He paused for a long moment and thought about the question he was asked. It hit him hard and hit him deep. The answer to this question had haunted him for the last nearly three years. Every couple of months ignoring it or denying it became harder and harder. He took a deep breath and prepped the press answer.

     “Yeah, sure. Who doesn’t want a family?”

     He smiled and hoped it was one that hid how he really felt. The women of The View didn’t speak. It was as if they were giving him more time to form a complete answer.

   “Having a family is what I would call the ultimate goal,” he finished.

     “So a wife, kids?”

     Chris thought back to her at the mention of a wife. He swallowed and nodded.

     “Yeah, why not.”

 He smiled again and pushed any other feelings back into the box he held that was wrapped with a tightly secured bow, the box he rarely opened because the box was becoming a painful joke that he was the butt of. The rest of the interviewed segment went off without a hitch, and after another fifteen minutes, he was on his way to yet another interview. Press for Infinity War was killing him. He’d purposely piled on more than humanly possible onto his plate to avoid several truths. All that work was taking a toll. He was exhausted.

     All the work also left little time for downtime, which meant relationships were impacted, or lack thereof. Every woman he’d been with never amounted to anything. None of them were right; none of them made him feel anything like how he felt in the past. They lasted a few months and then fizzled or more than months, and he lost interest. He’d begun to think he’d never meet anyone that was right, never meet anyone he could talk to so easily as he spoke with her. He worked extra hard to keep it all off his mind, but for the last few months, it was becoming more and more difficult.

  By the time he made it home, he was exhausted and ready for bed, but he didn’t sleep, he sat up and drifted into his memories of Las Vegas, of her—Vixen. He opened the drawer of his office and pulled out the weathered paper and unfolded it. He looked over her handwriting and her words.

     When you get the paperwork, send it here and consider it done. Have a nice life. 5578 Carsington Way P.O Box 2687, San Francisco, California.

  He groaned and finished the glass of whiskey he was nursing. After staring at the note for a few more minutes, he put it back in his desk and shook his head. He’d thought about that night many times, and many times he came to the same conclusion, he was an asshole.

  He walked to the kitchen and took out the leftover take out from the night before and heated it. His phone rang, distracting him from his thoughts. He smiled when he saw it was his mother.

     “Hey, mom.”

     “Chris. We saw you on The View today. How are you, honey?”

     He sighed and dropped his head back. He’d talked to her a few months back about his feelings and thoughts, and he regretted it. When he wanted to forget, she was always there to remind him. He didn’t want to remember; he wanted to forget and bury it.

     “I’m good mom; I was just sitting down to dinner.”

     “Please tell me no more takeout,” Lisa Evans sighed out.

      The microwave beeped, and he looked over the leftover takeout and shook his head.

 “It’s the last of it.”

   “Christopher Robert Evans. You need to take better care of yourself or find someone who can,” she chastised.

      “I’m fine mom. No time for anyone.”

    “Work won’t keep you warm at night, work won’t marry you and love you back, work won’t produce a child that looks like you, work won’t give you a fulfilling life,” she drilled. He knew what she spoke was true, but he didn’t want to go there. He didn’t see how he could.

    “Honey you’re not getting any younger. I remember our conversation.”

    “Oh, I know you remember mom. Look, it’ll happen when it’s time. Until then, I’ll work and secure an empire for that future family. I have to go mom; I love you. Bye.”

    He hung up and rubbed the back of his neck. He didn’t know how much longer he could go on like this. Something had to change, or his sanity would break.

 ~~~~~~~

-Vixen-

   “I can’t believe we’ve only been open for two months and we’ve been ranked number one ever since. That is unheard of Vix,” Nexus said with an excited glint in her eyes. You nodded and flipped through the folder before you.

    “I have to admit it does feel amazing. I’ve worked so hard for this. It almost didn’t happen.”

    “No, this was always meant to be. Nothing could have stopped you,” Nexus bolstered.

     You smiled; she was always there encouraging you and making sure you never lost sight of how far you’d come. She was your best friend, one of the few you trusted and your sister.

     “Thanks, Nex.”

    “Never thank me Vix, that’s what big sisters are for.”

     “Oh, girl bye you are only nine months older than me, so please stop.”

 She laughed and shrugged as she walked to the door of your office.

    “Nine months is still older. Anyway, make sure you come down and show your face, you know a personable chef and owner brings more customers, and more customers mean more money.”

    You rolled your eyes and sat there looking at the screens on your wall that showed all the security footage in the restaurant tonight. You looked over all the diners taking in their expressions and checked in on the cooks in the kitchen, paying close attention to how they prepared your precious recipes. You decided tonight not to oversee the kitchen firsthand you chose to trust your staff. Tonight, you had an important task to be the face of Giovanni’s. You stood, brushed the crease out your form-fitting dress. You shook your arms out to make sure the cutout sleeves dropped the way they should. Once you were happy with your appearance, you stepped out your office and walked to the elevator and rode it down to the main floor.

   Once the doors opened, you pasted the smile on your face and walked out into the dining area. You smiled and nodded at diners to the right and greeted others to the right. As you approached, everyone you greeted expressed happiness to see you and complimented the food they ate, the atmosphere around; everything was to their liking.

     “Ms. Giovanni.”

    You looked behind you to see Francisco DeBarge one of the best food critics in the city.

    “Francisco, what a surprise. How are you?”

 You stepped closer and allowed him to kiss your cheeks two times.

    “I’m doing well. My, my you look simply divine,” he said, looking you up and down with a pleased look on his face. You rolled your shoulders back, feeling your skin crawl.

    “To what do I owe the pleasure of your company here tonight?”

    “Tonight I came here to try your menu finally,” Francisco said.

     “Oh, really. I’d lost hope after Carlo, Idalia, Peter, and Hector came and raved. I thought you’d decided I wasn’t worth the time.”

    “Quite the contrary, I was waiting for the perfect time. Tonight is that time.”

    “I see; and how did you find the menu?”

    He paused and looked around the restaurant and smiled, but it wasn’t any ol’ smile it left you skin crawling even more.

 “I found no complaints. The food was delicious, well prepared, the ambiance was relaxing, the service impeccable. I have not one complaint,” Francisco complimented.

    You smiled widely. While you knew all of this to be true you still felt nervous having him here critiquing everything you worked so hard to accomplish. One bad review and it could be detrimental to your success. You smiled again and cleared your throat.

 “I am glad to hear that Francisco, thank you for the great review.”

    “No problem. Maybe we could celebrate over dinner tomorrow night,” he questioned.

    You pinched your lips to stifle the laugh threatening to overflow from within you. That was the last thing in the world you wanted. You’d heard rumors about him and his tastes and how he treated women. You were not interested at all.

    “Unfortunately, Francisco I’m not dating. I have way too much going on.”

    It wasn’t a lie; it was true. Your life was as hectic as it came. Francisco examined you under a stern eye as if he were trying to figure out if you were lying or intimidate you. He didn’t know you; you weren’t easily intimidated.

    “Well, again thank you for the review, and I hope your evening was well spent. Have a good night.”

 You turned and walked further into the dining area and continued to greet your customers. You tried to shake off the feeling of disgust in your stomach from your encounter with Francisco. You smiled so much your cheeks hurt, and you shook so many hands you knew you were covered in germs.  By the time the restaurant closed and you’d done all your duties including double-checking the stockroom for the next night, checking shipments, and dealing with emails it was late, and when the car stopped in front of your brownstone, it was almost one in the morning.

As you lifted your foot to climb the steps, you saw a torn magazine with its cover faced up. You stopped and peered closer to the dirty cover. You saw it was a cover of the Marvel superheroes. You could make out the words “Infinity War.” As you bent to pick it up, your front door opened and the glow of the light from inside bathed you.

    “What’re you doing?”

    You looked up at the smiling face of your mother and briefly looked back to the cover. You stood and walked the steps to your door.

   “Nothing.”

     “You’re late.”

     “I know I’m sorry; it was a busy night.”

   You walked inside, took off your coat and placed it into the coat closet.

     “All work Vix.”

 You sighed; she’d said this before so many times. You’ve heard it again and again, and you were tired of it.

   “I know mom, but work pays the bills, work keeps this house, work makes sure you don’t work anymore, and work isn’t all that bad,” you listed off as you walked through the house to the kitchen.

    “I have no problem working again. I have my own house, yes you paid it off, and I am grateful, but you didn’t have to. All I am trying to say honey is you’re not getting any younger, and you need a partner. You need someone to take care of you as much as you take care of everyone else. I just want you to be happy,” she expressed.

     You knew she meant well, they all did, and you appreciated the concern because you knew they loved you, but it wasn’t easy to listen to this over the years. You finished the bottle of sparkling water you drank, dropped it into the garbage and nodded.

   “I know mom. Whatever God has in the cards for me, I will accept.”

    You walked away and out of the kitchen with her hot on your heels.

    “You cannot leave all of the work to God; you have to help him a little bit.”

    “And I will, but all on God’s time.”

    She stared at you with an exasperated look on her face. She knew she was at an impasse.

  “You are going to be thirty this year, keep that in mind while you’re pretending to wait on God’s timing when in fact you’ve checked out, and I do not know why. Ever since you came back from that trip to Las Vegas those years ago, you’ve been different.”

     You sighed again and opened your mouth to speak, but the knock saved you. You walked to the door and opened it and smiled at your father.

    “Hi, daddy.”

    “Hello, my beautiful girl.”

He wrapped you in a tight hug. You loved his hugs; you always felt better no matter what.

    “I got the text your mother’s ready.”

    “Yes, she is ready and waiting, right mom.”

   She rolled her eyes at your demur act.

    “Fine. Just remember Vixen you deserve happiness, you deserve love,” she informed as she took her coat and walked through the threshold to your father.

    “Good night, mom, thank you for staying.”

    You kissed her cheek and then your father’s and watched them descend the steps and get in the car. You closed the door, leaned on it, and looked around. You’d worked very hard for this house. The countless nights of bartending and saving and living at your parents had all been worth it. While you weren’t exactly where you wanted to be, you were well on your way. You weren’t even thirty yet, and you had your own successful restaurant, your own car, and your own home.

   You sighed again and took up your purse then walked up the stairs turning off lights as you went. You walked down the hall and to your bedroom and began peeling off the dress. Once you were finally free from the material, you walked into the bathroom and turned on the faucet to fill the tub. You needed a bath tonight. You flipped on the TV and surfed the channels not looking for anything in particular. You stopped on TMZ only because there was nothing else on. You allowed the sound to fill your background and walked back to your room to the wine fridge. This was the piece that sold you on the house, a wine fridge in every room and what was better a code accessed wine cooler.

    You entered your code and took out a bottle of your favorite rose̒ and filled the glass to the brim. You took a hefty sip and moaned as the floral and fruit flavors battled for control, neither won because the subtleness of the wine was far too superior. From the TV in the bathroom, you heard his name mentioned. You slowly walked to the bathroom and leaned on the French doors and watched as the paparazzi swarmed him snapping picture after picture and shouting question after question at him. He smiled and politely answered the few he chose. He spoke of the upcoming release of the new Avengers movie and talked about how much fun he had working on it and then came a question that he avoided.

    “Any idea when you’ll settle down?”

    He didn’t look like he had an answer, and even more, he looked speechless and a little sad. That piqued your interest. You took another sip of the wine and absentmindedly watched the TV and the commentary about him. Many of the girls openly ogled him, and some of the guys also did. You didn’t blame them; the years had been kind to him. He looked to have bulked up even more, and his hair was now redder than you remember—it looked good on him. You took a deep breath as something close to regret and guilt filled your chest.

    It was then you heard it; the patter of feet and the jovial sound of a giggle. You smiled and placed the glass on top of the counter beside the sink and turned with your arms crossing your chest. Then in burst the joy of your life. Once she saw you, she stopped and gasped.

    “Uh-oh,” her sweet little voice said pronouncing the words with childlike innocence.

    “Uh-oh is right little one. You are supposed to be asleep.”

    “No tired,” she responded, giving you an innocent smile. The smile you were always powerless against.

    You smirked and allowed the smile to fill your face. She smiled and squealed as she clumsily hurried to you. Meeting her halfway, you lifted her into your arms and kissed all over her soft face. She laughed and wiggled when you added tickles. Soon she was a wiggly, squealing ball of energy and you loved it. You held her small body and moaned taking in her smell. You loved how she smelled; it was so delicate, like roses, sunshine, candy, and crayons. It was the scent that filled your home for the last nearly three years.

    “How are you, my love? Did you have a good day with gamma?”

    She nodded excitedly.

    “Uh-huh, she wet me ‘ave two cookie ‘fo dinno.”

    “Oh, really?”

    “She say no twell mamma, shh, secwet.”

    You snorted and carried her to the bathroom with you and turned off the water.

    “Our little secret princess. I have an idea. How about we both take a warm bath?”

  You pointed to the tub that was now filled with water and overflowing with bubbles. Her eyes lit up with excitement.

   “Otay.”

   You walked to the sink, placed her on top of it, and began taking off her clothes. Once she was down to her pull-ups she pulled them off herself.

     “I big gwirl, I oo it.”

    “Yes, you are Ella, mommy’s big girl.”

    She loved baths, but she loved them even more with you. For the next hour, you held her on your lap as she played with her toys and the bubbles and babbled to her heart’s content. You relaxed in the warm water and felt all the stress leave your body listening to your sweet baby girl’s conversations with herself. This was the highlight of your day. This was why you worked so hard over the years, and this was why you’d continue to work hard. You’d learned long ago that a man was not a needed part of your life; they brought sadness and disappointment. The only important thing was Ella.

    You didn’t even realize you’d dozed off in the tub with Ella fast asleep on your chest until you felt the chill to the water. You climbed out of the tub and wrapped you both in a towel and walked to her bedroom. When you walked in, you placed her in her bed and gathered fresh pajamas and her lotion and began to lotion and dress her. Every so often she stirred, but you quickly soothed her by humming her favorite lullaby. You tucked her in, kissed her forehead, and walked out back to your bedroom where you didn’t bother with anything; you simply passed out in your bed towel and all.

TagList:

 @sarahboseman @heyauntieeee @airis-paris14 @thiccdaddy-mbaku @wakandas-vibranium @wakanda-inspired @theunsweetenedtruth @ashanti-notthesinger @reignsxjackson @halfrican-heat @ambthegamer @simplyyamberr @muse-of-mbaku @sisterwifeudaku @mejustme06 @ilcb7 @leahnicole1219  @destinio1 @maliadestiny @drsunshine97 @blowmymbackout @purplehairgawdess @thehuntoyobun @wakandamama @wakandawinning @profilia @zxddy-panther @h-challa @babygirlofwakanda @misswakanda2018 @challaxkillmonger @ororowrites @hutchj @myfavemarvelfanfics @lavitabella87 @afraiddreamingandloving @autumn242 @purple-apricots @skysynclair19 @hersheyskissesss-blog @blue-ishx @blublubleu @90sinspiredgirl @tchallaswife @tchallamakesmeh0lla @turn-thy-paige @blackchickfics @blackpantherismyish @inlovewithmakeupcomicsanimelove @naturally-bri @flawlesslybeautiful14 @qweentbh @lunaerly @theoutereffect @twilight-sapphire-lover @pupyluv247 @stark-red19 @cockyboysandsugarism @maverickabull @madbadsiren @aykanna @myaw731 @ruruly20 @mixedmelanin @brittyevans @bezzywazhere @laketaj24 @taint3dvirgin @soulsparker @theresnomoregoodones @syreanne @loveandcigarillos  @heybriheyyy @wakanda-bcth @uhlxis @yaachtynoboat711 @geeksareunique @bultalongthewayside @ajspencer1892 @captiansaveasmut @imaginewhoever @terrablaze514 @starsshines-blog @scrumptiouslytenaciouscrusade @darkandlovely94 @sithlordslut @wavyyc @naturalistamisslyn @nigarachi15 @madamslayyy @blackandfair @kreolemami @mylastnameisthe-fish @kaykay0829 @chaneajoyyy @tequilajay27 @blacklotus-of-the-black-kingdom @slimmiyagi @im5ftbutmythroat66 @jaeee-http @madhatterhelsing @sunflowerpsalms @wakanda-shit-is-that @deliciousstreetkidcroissant @jecourt @vebner37 @disneysdarlingdiva @melaninmarvel @alanastormborn @dolphinpink310 @wonderbell @ohleucothea @queentearra @bitchbetterhavemydinner @fentybabyy @kaykay4454fan @priya212 @kitkit1690 @chrismarcs @beautycomesindifferentformsworld @blackpantherimagines @ovohanna24 @sweetpeachjones @kslo000 @nubian-queen18 @omgsuperstarg @prettyprincessushio @treeondrea  @ursapharoh05 @blackpinup22 @kaytauru @big3gocandykahn @kissingpineapples @wildaboutchrisevans @fitfineandstayingalive @misspooh @michele-onel @gorjiss @muva-milaje @limbo-limbo-limbo @awkwardlyabstract @blxck-brxndie  @meeky-imagines @inlovewith3 @metalarmlover @mellowjellow6 @sweettea-and-honeybutter @thatrandomhetaliachick @missdeerstalker15 @marvelheaux @romanceoftheeveryday-blog @mufasathatniggatho @cltex84 @sweetbearcolorgarden @msincognito67 @mosagram @mar-ta-3 @ljstraightnochaser @lewatigress @akimi-youngblood  @bekahdean87 @teechallas-blog @jasmindaughteroftheworld @cocooned-butterfly @emoniclark22 @chereedrop619 @theblulife @niggarachi15 @great-neckpectations @avenger-marvel-fan @arieljamiyla @vibranium-soul @apileofmiscsomethings @niecey4cocaine @missumuch1918 @chillavesss @heynessss @shamelessqueenobservation @cetouna @cosmicmelaninflower  @tntnv @dopegalkk @babyblowomg @somansystars-and-westillstarve @determinednot2fall @zoezoe34 @chasingsunlight @somanystars-and-westillstarve @diamyyyyy @kumkaniudaku @give-me-a-million-dollars-pls@shyblackgirl @your-resident-evil @stillevansbae @sheisexcellent @oceanscorazon @hautehoneyfitness @bistoolada @sunigyrl @igotmadskills @adifferentme @bugngiz @mellowcyclepuppy @wellthirsted @caramara3 @pananegra @amethyst09 @champagnesugamama   @marvelfansworld @kemkem101 @periodtevans @fullonfrenzy @domdollass @deansbbysblog @captainsamwlsn @westindianshorty @chillavesss @90sinspiredgirl @cutewylie @sonjashuterbugjohnson

A/N: Face Claim used for Ella is Greyson Land. Image is not my own.

#love maybe fic #Chris Evans #chris evans fanfiction #chris evans x reader #Chris Evans X black reader #chris evans x you #chris evans smut #chris evans x ofc #black fanfiction #angst fanfic #slow burn fanfic

[dansiere]

LITTLE CHARACTER THINGS

Just a fun little character game. Fill in the below categories with 3-5 things that your character can be identified by. Repost & tag away !

TAGGED BY: @reantte & @chaoswilled, who both like to see me suffer. TAGGING: it’s a wonderful meme thus I encourage you all to go ahead & steal it [just tag me when you do]; @handspoken / @balletshoes, @huntershowl, @kissafist, @spiraledheart, @mettatoniic, @inhumanistic, @breselin & @carvedbones get a tag nonetheless.

EMOTIONS / FEELINGS:

001. Nostalgic; struck by an all-consuming kind of grief.

002. Passionate, severely dedicated.

003. Compassionate; loving & caring fiercely.

004. Insecure; self-depreciation is her greatest vice.

005. Courageous, recklessly so.

GREETINGS:

001. a small wave, brisk & efficient.

002. a handshake, maybe; usually of the awkward kind.

003. a petite nod, occasionally; whenever she is busy or otherwise occupied.

004. greeting someone by saying their name or an enthusiastic “hello / good-morning / good day” etc.

COLOURS:

001. pastel pink, any shade of pink & even red really, but its pastel version holds the greatest value.

002. peach; perhaps even shades of orange.

003. (pastel) blue; several shades thereof. Turquoise & a tint of green.

004. ivory; see her skin, the base colour of sheer fabric.

005. grey & variations thereof. 

SCENTS:

001. freshly washed laundry.

002. the ocean; the scent of the sea.

003. lush forests; a Spring breeze, bit of an earthly hue.

004. flowers; anything rose-y, really. 

005. polished steel.

CLOTHING:

001. as a servant / Homeworld: typical leotard & sheer skirt + ballet slippers kept in white, black & shades of grey (while serving White Diamond), later frilly, multi-coloured dress with sheer fabric wrapped around her hip & a pink underskirt, ballet slippers & juvenile, “rosebud” shaped hair (while serving Pink Diamond).

002. during the rebellion / War for Earth: major change in attire; tight grey sheer top + blue vest underneath combo, peach coloured shorts & orange-tinted boots; sleeveless. Wild, unkempt hair resembling her earlier “rosebud” cut but far more dishevelled; sabre in hand.

003. post-war: hair a tad more ‘tame’, same tight shirt & shorts combo but a shift in colour with sheer sleeves + overthrow worn across the shoulders. Legwarmers paired with ballet slippers, heart-shaped cleavage.

004. post Rose’s death: same shirt with slight variations; star on her chest, sleeves again gone. Colour shifted to bright turquoise with sheer skirt & pastel coloured shorts worn underneath (reaching down to her knees), low cut socks + ballet slippers, very, VERY neatly kept hair with not a single strand out of place. Later, she dons a swift alteration thereof; the star on her chest is more strikingly depicted, sheer skirt replaced by a ribbon / bow tied around her hip; yellow shorts instead of pink. Hair a tad more unkempt.

005. post “CYM” / Future: wears a denim-esque jacket with a star on her back. Long, high cut trousers revealing her shins in addition to pink ballet slippers. Wears a turquoise, shoulderless top underneath the jacket with a heart-shaped cleavage. Hair resembles her war-haircut; more dishevelled, rebellious.

OBJECTS:

001. various swords & sabres neatly cared for & stored either in her gemstone or room. She has amassed quite the collection of ancient & legendary weapons over the centuries, ranging from simple marine sabres & battle axes to Excalibur (which she, at some point, pulled out of the stone).

002. her gemweapon, aka lances & variations / modifications thereof. 

003. a mobile phone she got shortly before “CYM”; one of the few items she does not store in her gemstone.

004. dried roses at the back of a journal; one she wrote & sketched in back before the war. Hidden deep within her gemstone. 

005. an array of other, different items stored in her gemstone (first-aid items, car keys, tools, various instruments, telephone numbers, various weapons such as shotguns, etc). 

VICES / BAD HABITS:

001. Inferiority Complex / Low-Self Esteem. Pearl automatically deems herself inferior to others or simply not good enough, falling victim to hysteria whenever failing to succeed on her first try. -- this usually triggers sentiments of extreme self-decrepitation or emotional fits. Additionally, these feelings of deeply seated insecurity & self-hatred turn her bitter / petty & coerce her to crave validation in any shape or form. She can come across as a know-it-all, as condescending or arrogant given how she will continuously bring up her achievements, knowledge & countless justifications as to why (e.g) she did what she did or why sth. did not work to counter these ever-looming feelings of utter worthlessness.

002. Obsessive / Borderline Neurosis. A vice that goes hand in hand with 001; Pearl is obsessed with the past (may it be in the shape of mistakes or ‘happy memories’), symmetry, cleanliness & people per se; especially Rose has always been a sore topic in that matter. In fact, her obsession went as far as to turn into a serious neurosis / the unquenchable urge to hyperfixate on something & mercilessly obsess over it in turn. Without something to obsess over, Pearl breaks apart. While she loves fiercely, this kind of behaviour is prone to “smother” those in her care. May it be through overprotectiveness or overly critical / a “mother knows best” kind of demeanour.

003. Terrible Coping Mechanisms / Living in Denial. Pearl is guilty of  “trauma compartmentalizing”; she represses her traumatizing experiences & memories in a self-destructive way. As demonstrated in “A Single Pale Rose”, her mind is structured in layers; the deeper “in” you go, the more she unravels & falls apart; on the surface, she tries to keep it all together but is well-aware of the mess waiting on the brink. -- Pearl additionally keeps amassing problems / trauma rather than facing any of them.

004. Stuck in the Past / Unable to Let Go; Probably a given one that does not require further explaining given what I already detailed further above. -- ever one to fondly remember the War & the role she had in it, she cannot let go of what once was. This is especially true whenever the casualties of war (guilt complex) or Rose Quartz are concerned; the latter coerced her to live the greatest half of her life (post Steven’s birth) trapped in a perpetual state of grieving & yearning for all she has lost.

005. Liar / secretive. Pearl has been prone to lie & twist her words ever since she was given to Pink Diamond 8000 years ago. What started as an attempt to protect Pink from the Diamond Authority soon turned second nature. While she usually lies out of a good reason, partially due to having been “forbidden” to talk about certain matters, lack of social skills + her compassion & eager will to spare e.g. Steven from harsh truths or to protect herself, it is a terrible vice she cannot shake.

BODY LANGUAGE:

001. gestures quite a lot; may it be with her hands or expressions. Usually underlines her points by sweeping arm or hand movements; prone to “put her whole body into it”.

002. Arms wrapped around her body, predominately her waist. Usually a sign of discomfort or tension that she simply cannot brush aside. Often paired with her glare wandering aside / avoiding eye contact.

003. Broad stance / legs apart as opposed to her feet usually positioned in First Position. Radiates rare moments of confidence, often paired with her hands either on her hips or wrapped around her lance / sword. She usually places said weapon on her shoulder or sprawled across it. 

004. Head held up high (e.g.: confident / disapproving) or head kept low (e.g.: insecurity / doubt); a gesture often affecting her entire stance - spine straightened & shoulders squared whenever poised, posture hunched whenever insecure.

005. balled fists out of anger / arm lifted & body positioned in front of someone she ought to defend.

AESTHETICS:

001. The Art of Slowly Falling Apart. “everything is perfectly fine”: a cursed phrase on the tip of your tongue; repeated endlessly. The paradoxical sentiment of deeming onself above all else. -- above the past, the pain, your former life -- & failing to realize that you are anything but, that control has long slipped from your grasp; that threads hold your broken self together, that you are so close to falling apart & yet play pretend.

002. All-Consuming Love. ever devoted, passionate / obsessively loving with all your heart. The yearning, mutual & unconditional dedication to something beautiful but fragile. You live in a fantasy alongside her / the kind you dreamt about ever since you freed yourself from Homeworld’s shackles. -- it is the kind of love that demands & demands & demands all you willingly give.

003. Dance. a part of your very identity, even the part of the past you ought to loathe; a fact that leaves you aching. It is embedded in your very code. A love for beauteous choreographies even integrated into melee combat; pristine, elegant, flawless; dancing to the mellow melody of some piano piece playing in the background. 

004. the Ocean. may it be the aesthetic of giving oneself to the depths or wuthering emotions crashing down threatening to smite you into pieces / but also its power, the very effect the scent of salt & the sound of cascades have on you. -- something you ought to oppose but can’t. 

005. the Battlefield / Revolution. swords clutched in aching hands; breathing heavily. The thrill of battle, the dirt under your nails; ever listening to the beating of a drum at the back of your head. You are Fire, Passion incarnate: cutting the cord, shattering those that wronged you, overcoming opposition & the conditioned voice inside your head, fighting against all odds / one step away from a cracked gemstone. Breaking the chains, literally.

SONGS / PIECES:

001. Running up that Hill -- Kate Bush.

002. Both Sides Now -- Joni Mitchell.

003. Eight -- Sleeping At Last.

004. Romeo -- Until the Ribbon Breaks.

005. My Boy Builds Coffins / Blinding / Over the Love -- Florence & the Machine.

Bonus: Cut the Cord -- Shinedown; not her style but boy does this give me Renegade Pearl vibes.

#[[ I am cheating in the music section I know I know #but I just have so many songs I relate to Pearl #hence why I did not list any pieces #even if I could write down a million gah. But yeah I got carried away again as per usual. Mobile users pls forgive me. ]] #vii. 𝗷𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝗮 𝗽𝗶𝗲𝗰𝗲 𝗼𝗳 𝗮 𝗴𝗿𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝘄𝗵𝗼𝗹𝗲.

[writing-in-the-impala]

You Always Hurt The Ones You Love (Part 9)

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

AU: Professor!Bucky Barnes/ Teacher!Bucky Barnes

Series Summary: You fall for your smoking hot literature professor Bucky Barnes (quite literally) what follows you never predicted would happen.

Warnings: Swearing, Drinking, teacher-student relationship (but like it’s all legal chill) and mentions of PTSD because it’s Bucky, SLOWburn we’re in for a long ride

Word Count: 2793

A/N:  Please leave me love and reblog this so i get inspired to write more, okay thanks 

MASTERLIST | SERIES MASTERLIST | Part 1,  Part 2,  Part 3,  Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8

The whole weekend you spent all your free time with Bucky, you spent most of your time lounging about and relaxing by watching movies cuddled up together, reading books on his balcony cuddled up, and cooking together. The two of you barely left each others sides and when you did it wasn't for long. "I'm going to have to leave a bit earlier today." You started and Bucky pouted his lips making himself look like a sad puppy. "I'm sorry I'd love to stay but I actually need to do some work Steve set me and I promised Peter I'll come round to plan a family vacation." You explained and Bucky's expression didn't change.

"I don't want you to leave." He said pecking your forehead.

"I don't want to leave especially because the next time I'll see you will be at school." You said pouting and Bucky sighed.

"How am I meant to teach a class with you right there and how am I meant to act professional." He said and you gave him a sad smile.

"That's something we'll need to figure out if we want us to work without loosing our job slash education." You said and Bucky nodded you could see he was thinking.

"What are you doing tomorrow after school?" He asked.

"Probably whatever work you set me." You replied.

"Do you want to come over? I'll make dinner, you can study here I'll try not to be a distraction." He said winking at the last part.

"I don't know..." You began knowing that you wouldn't do any studying around him.

"Come on, who can help you with your work more than me?" Bucky asked.

"Steve." You said in a sassy tone to annoy Bucky. His mouth fell open to resemble a massive O and he just sat there shaking his head. You sat up so you weren't leaning on him pushed his jaw back up so his mouth was closed and kissed him.

"You know what maybe date Steve instead." Bucky said playfully and you rolled your eyes.

"Okay I'll see you on Monday then I'm going over to Steve's." You said standing up and Bucky stood up and hugged you from behind kissing your neck all the way up to your ear before whispering. "You're not going anywhere." And spinning you round to kiss you properly.

"Mmm, Bucky I'd love to stay but I genuinely have to leave." You said breaking the kiss apart.

"I'll miss you." He said.

"I'll miss you too see you tomorrow." You said giving him a hug and kissing him before you left. You went straight to visit Peter and May and spend some time with them, you learnt that Tony was down in Washington for business for a week, Peter told you all about school and he also questioned you about the man in your Snapchats and what house you've been at all weekend, you told him nothing avoiding his questions. When you got home you got even more questions from your roommates but you simply replied. "I'm too tired it's a long story." And went to your room to finish the work Steve set you.

Monday felt like it was taking forever, for all of Bucky's lesson you were just waiting for it to end, it seemed like Bucky was doing the same because he even ended the lesson early. You didn't speak to him after the lesson but received a text from him saying "7 at mine for food + study? Sound good?" And you replied with a simple. "Yes."

Bucky didn't lie when he said he won't distract you. You came over set up on his kitchen island while he was in the kitchen cooking that let the two of you talk but also focus individually. "So basically I'm meant to analyse how Fitzgerald uses the light as a character?" You said referring to the book Bucky set to analyse.

"Yeah so write about how it's used as a metaphor for Gatsby's love, how it disappears when Gatsby is with Daisy and stuff like that." Bucky explained without even turning around.

"Oh right okay thanks." You said before continuing to write but then your phone began to ring. You looked at the caller ID and it was a number you didn't recognise. "Hello?" You answered and Bucky turned around giving you a puzzled look as if asking who was calling and you shrugged. "This is New York General Hospital I'm calling because you're listed as Mr Parker's emergency contact."  The lady over the phone said and your face dropped.

"Is he okay?" You said your voice shaking Bucky turned off the cooker and walked around the counter wrapping his arms around you while the caller explained to you what happened to Peter, Bucky didn't know what's going on but he could hear the fear in your voice and pain in your face so he did his best to comfort you.  "Okay thank you I'll be there as soon as possible." You said ending the call.

"What's wrong?" Bucky asked you as your tried not to cry.

"Peter he was in an accident something happened at school he was in a trip he tried to help his friends and he got them out but he got injured and now he's in hospital, I'm sorry Bucky I need to go." You said standing up and gathering your things.

"Leave your stuff, just take your jacket come on I'll get you there quickly." Bucky said going to grab his keys.

"You have a car? Why is this the first time I hear of this?" You said distracted.

"Better." He said holding up a bike helmet. "Catch." He said throwing it to you.

"You know if I wasn't stressed I'd be so impressed right now, I love bikes." You said following him out the apartment.  You ride to the hospital in Bucky's bike and got there quite quickly definitely faster than if you took the subway, Bucky looked amazing in his leather jacket driving the most amazing bike.  When you got to the hospital you went inside and Bucky said he'd follow you in after he locks the bike up. You walked up to the desk, your heart beating out of your chest the nerves building. "How may I help you?" The receptionist asked.

"Um, my brother, I'm his emergency contact, I-" You began to explain before a phone rang.

"Please hold." The woman said and you just stood there not knowing what to do as she picked up the phone. "Sorry okay your brother yes?" She asked and just when you were about to speak someone pushed in front of you.

"My son needs to see a doctor right now." The woman who pushed in front of you said. "I'm sorry I'm currently serving this lady. The receptionist said pointing to your. "But you don't understand me son-" the other woman argued. "He has to wait-" "he can't wait-"

"Enough!" A loud voice broke through. Bucky was standing there behind the woman who was trying to cut in and went to wrap his arms around you after he broke up the argument. "Ma'am with all due respect your son isn't in critical condition while my girlfriend's brother is. Plus she was in line before you so may you let her talk to the receptionist. Thank you." Bucky said he sounded angry but also he wasn't raising his voice, he was also at the same time comforting you. "May I see you ID miss, and may I get the name of the patient you're looking for." The receptionist said.

"Yes of course it's Peter Parker." You said and the receptionist looked at your ID.

"You have a different surname to Mr Parker." The receptionist stated.

"Yes we have different fathers." You said panicking slightly that they won't let you see him.

"Well you are listed as one of his emergency contacts so there's no problems he's in room E13 it's on the second floor you can take the elevator at the end of that hall." She said pointing you in the right direction. You and Bucky basically ran to the elevator. In the elevator Bucky put his arms around you to comfort you he could sense how scared you are, honestly you were terrified of the state Peter is in you were terrified how bad his injuries were. "He's okay." Bucky whispered into you ear.

"I hope so." You replied as the elevator doors opened and Bucky let go off you taking your hand in his as you walked through the corridor to find Peter's room.

"Do you want me to go in with you or wait outside?" Bucky asked carefully not knowing where you are at in the relationship are you anywhere near ready to tell Peter about him?

"I need all the support I can get." You replied and Bucky squeezed your hand re-assuringly as you knocked on the door. "Come in." You heard Peter say and you sighed from relief at the sound of his voice, you opened the door to reveal Peter lying on the bed with a bandage around his head some plasters on his face and and  IV drip connected while he ate a chocolate pudding cup. "Peter you son of a bitch." You said walking in your reaction shocked both Peter and Bucky.

"No how are you? No are you okay? Really feeling the love sis." Peter said rolling his eyes.

"I was scared you were in a coma or something but your just sitting here eating pudding." You said laughing at your prior panic.

"I mean it's the better of the two." Peter said shrugging.

"Most definitely." You said hugging him. "Hey." You said as you pulled away. "Peter this is Bucky, my-" you began.

"Boy toy." Peter interupted.

"Hey!" You said annoyed while at the same time Bucky laughed and replied. "I prefer knight in shining armour but boy toy will do." He replied and Peter laughed.

"I like him, can we keep him." Peter replied and you laughed going over to Bucky and looking up at him.

"Hm I don't know Peter." You said before scruffing his hair and giving him a peck on the cheek. "He is cute and I have a soft spot for him I guess we can keep him." You said and Bucky smilled a great big adorable smile.

"Does this mean I get the approval of the protective little brother?" Bucky questioned taking a seat next to Peter's bed as did you.

"Hm yeah but you hurt her well I may not look it but I can kick your ass." Peter said protectively.

"Meaning he'll ask dad to do it." You said and Peter rolled his eyes making Bucky laugh once again. "Speaking of is he still out of town?"

"Yep."

"Is May coming to see you?"

"Yeah they called her like they called you, but apparently you were faster."

"We took the bike tis why." Bucky added.

"You have a motor bike!" Peters face lit up like he won a thousand bucks, the money not a thousand Bucky's although he seemed pretty happyto have one in his life. The three of you carried on casually talking, it was nice seeing Bucky and Peter interact they seemed to get along well and actually like each other which warmed your heart. "Peter Parker! Never scare me like that ever again." A voice came from the doorway, the three of you turned to look in that direction and saw May standing there looking flustered like she ran to the hospital, which she probably did.

"Hey why is everyone angry at me?" Peter said defensively.

"because we love you. Anyway, hi May, May this is Bucky, Bucky, May." You said introducing them.

"Lovely to finally meet you ma'am." Bucky said acting all grown up reminding you of him at work.

"likewise but I must ask who you are Y/N didn't mention a-" May began but Peter cut in with "Boy toy." Making Bucky laugh while you and May scolded him by saying "Peter!" In unison. May seemed to like Bucky, the four of you talked for a while, May had to leave for a bit to call Tony meanwhile Bucky and Peter made a bet about some stupid program that was on TV, Bucky lost to his disappointment and owed Peter a bag of gummy bears. "Okay I think we're gonna go soon." You said looking at the time.

"Okay, I'm just gonna have to go down to the vending machine real quick." Bucky replied.

"Wait? You're taking that seriously?" You said in disbelief.

"A bets a bet." Bucky shrugged.

"Yeah Y/N a bets a bet." Peter said in a cocky voice making everyone in the room laugh. "Oh Bucky?" Peter added as Bucky was about to leave.

"You're coming on the trip right?" Peter questioned.

"The trip?"

"The trip to Malaysia, Y/N and I have to bring plus ones and I thought..." Peter said instantly regretting starting this conversation when he saw the panic on your face.

"I forgot to ask you I'm sorry, I completely forgot. You don't have to come it's a stupid family thing." You said trying to discourage him.

"If your there I want to be there, we can talk more about this later, right now I've got some gummy bears to get." Bucky said kissing your forehead and leaving the room.

"Peter listen here no mention of Bucky to Tony, understand? Don't say the name around Tony." You said in all seriousness as May walked back into the room.

"Everything okay I saw Bucky leaving?" May asked.

"Yeah he's getting gummy bears for Peter, I was just telling Peter, don't say anything about Bucky to Tony. Please. Don't even mention his name." You said pleading.

"Okay, I understand he can be protective but he's not going to kill him." May said.

"I know, I, it's complicated, just I don't want him knowing I have a boyfriend."

"I promise I won't say anything." Peter said gently.

"Me too, but Tony is going to be here in a few minutes." May explained.

"What I thought he was out of town?" You panicked.

"He flew back because of Peter." May explained.

"Okay I need to find Bucky, if you ever need to mention Bucky call him Grant, because that's like his real name Bucky is a ncik name, so if you do mention Bucky to Tony call him Grant." You said trying to somehow save this situation. "I'm gonna go find Bucky and hide him- I mean Grant." You said before leaving the room. It didn't take long to find Bucky. "Bucky. Tony is here you need to hide."

"Wait why's Tony here?"

"I'll explain later now you need to hide or we're both dead."

"But Peter's gummy bears." Bucky said looking like a lost puppy.

"Are you kidding me? You're gonna lose your job over a stupid bet and gummy bears." You said and Bucky just looked at the pack of gummy bears.  "Give me those and follow me." You said taking the gummy bears off of him and pulling him into a room. "Okay put this on." You said giving him a lab coat and a doctors mask that you found in the room.

"How do I look?" Bucky said giving you a spin.

"Hot. But too much like you." You said thinking. "It's your hair." You said, then you proceeded to mess it up and restyle it to make it look very un-Bucky like. "Better." You said.

"I look like an idiot." He said looking in a mirror.

"But you don't look like professors Bucky Barnes."

"Mmm say that again." He said with a sly look.

"We don't have time for this Buck, you need to walk out this building without running into Tony, I'll go give Peter his stupid gummy bears and meet you outside." You explained and Bucky nodded. You walked towards Peter's hospital room, getting there in time to see Tony already sitting there talking to Peter. "Hi." You said walking in. "Peter, here's the gummy bears I owe you." You said throwing the gummy bears at Peter and hearing him say "ouch." In response. "Hey Tony, nice to see you back, I'd stay and talk but I really need to go."

"Are you sure she isn't actually my daughter?" Tony questioned picking up on how that sentence sounded very Tony Stark™️. Everyone laughed at Tony's comment and you quickly said your goodbyes before leaving to find Bucky who was sitting in his bike back in his normal outfit.

"Where's the doctors costume?" You questioned getting on the bike.

"Ditched it in a plant pot." Bucky said casually before speeding off.

Part 10 | More stuff I wrote

Tags (send me an ask or message and I’ll add you):@iconictaurus@whosmarisaaarw@grayxswan@sideeffectsofyou @alt-er-love-er-alt

#james buchanan barnes #Bucky Barnes #teacher!bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes/reader #bucky barns x reader #steve rogers #teacher! Steve Rogers #tony stark #dad!tony #peter parker #aunt may #spiderman #avengers #avengers endgame #spiderman far from home #captain america

[mediaeval-muse]

Book Review... Kat Howard, “Roses and Rot”

Rating: 2.5/5 stars

Reviewer Comments: I can’t remember how I came across this book, but it had been on my TBR list for a while, and I was in the mood for a fun fantasy novel, so I gave it a go. My criticisms probably stem more from personal taste than anything objectively wrong about the book, so keep that in mind as you read on. While I did enjoy the premise and the focus on the sibling relationship that was the heart of this novel, I wasn’t the biggest fan of the pacing or use of lore. At times, I felt like I was simply waiting for things to happen, so I didn’t feel as hooked into the plot as I hoped. But still, I liked the focus on sisterhood and the meditation on art and sacrifice, so if you like those things, you may want to give this book a try.

***Full review under the cut.***

Summary:  Imogen and her sister Marin have escaped their cruel mother to attend a prestigious artists’ retreat, but soon learn that living in a fairy tale requires sacrifices, be it art or love. What would you sacrifice in the name of success? How much does an artist need to give up to create great art? Imogen has grown up reading fairy tales about mothers who die and make way for cruel stepmothers. As a child, she used to lie in bed wishing that her life would become one of these tragic fairy tales because she couldn’t imagine how a stepmother could be worse than her mother now. As adults, Imogen and her sister Marin are accepted to an elite post-grad arts program—Imogen as a writer and Marin as a dancer. Soon enough, though, they realize that there’s more to the school than meets the eye. Imogen might be living in the fairy tale she’s dreamed about as a child, but it’s one that will pit her against Marin if she decides to escape her past to find her heart’s desire.

Things I Liked

Sibling Relationship: I really enjoyed the bond that existed between Imogen and Marin. I loved that the novel talked about how they grew up together, how they relied on each other to survive their mother, and how they support one another as adults. While things do get tense between them, I did appreciate that the central focus was always on their relationship.

Fairy Tales: Throughout the novel, there are breaks in the overall narrative so that the reader can read Imogen’s fairy tale creations. I loved these moments because they were whimsical and creative, bordering on dark but always poetic and deeply heartfelt.

Things I Didn’t Like

Lack of Suspense: At times, it seemed to me that things in this book would just happen without making use of suspense. Imogen sees things that suggest the retreat isn’t what it seems, but she brushes it off so often that there’s no sense of mystery. Lore and revelations were dropped on the reader at seemingly random times: for example, Helena simply relates her backstory while Evan tells Imogen about the retreat’s past, and so on. We have to wait around for Imogen to figure out how to help her sister rather than seeing her devise plans. Characters would carry on with normal life which made it seem like they didn’t care about what was happening at the retreat. I would have preferred that Imogen be more active, seeking answers for herself and piecing together what’s going on, perhaps striving to learn more about the history of the place, thereby creating mysteries that would have hooked me as a reader with the suspense of figuring everything out.

Lore: I’m going to try really hard not to give any spoilers here, so forgive the vague explanation. When the central mystery of the retreat is revealed, it rang a bit hollow for me. I felt that much of the lore was adapted to make the plot more dramatic (rather than being used to enhance the plot). For example, Imogen runs into a lot of magical rules, and what they are as well as when and why they can’t be broken seems arbitrary, like they’re made to facilitate drama. I would have preferred the novel be molded around the lore rather than the lore be made to fill in gaps in the plot.

Themes: While I did love the sibling relationship at the heart of this novel, the side meditation on art and sacrifice seemed inconsistent. There wasn’t much meditation on whether or not sacrificing everything for art was a worthy goal. Or the nature of “talent” or “genius.” This meditation could have worked well with the sibling relationship at stake, but I felt that as a whole, it was underused.

Characters: Many supporting characters didn’t quite seem fully realized. I was never sure of Gavin’s motivations, nor did I feel like Helena and Ariel were used to their fullest potential. Evan could have been interesting, given his backstory, but he also didn’t do much besides drop lore when necessary and become a subject of drama.

Recommendations: I would recommend this book if you’re interested in

fairy tales, magical worlds, magical lore

sibling relationships (especially between sisters)

surviving abusive parents

the arts (especially writing, dancing, and sculpture)

Similar Reads

#book reviews

[lightsandlostbells]

Skam season 3, episode 3 reaction

Thank you to everyone who has been reading and commenting so far! I love hearing people’s thoughts on S3 and reading anecdotes about other viewing experiences. This episode has some moments with a lot of room for varying interpretations; I would love to hear other POVs if you got a different reading out of a scene. It’s also one of the episodes where we have the original scripts, so we can compare the first draft with the finished product. 

Episode 3 feels like an impending train wreck up until the very end, where Robyn intervenes to keep things on track. 

SEASON 3, EPISODE 3 - “Now you’re bonding too much”

Clip 1 - Damage control, part 1

Isak starts off literally on the sidelines as he deals with the fallout of his ill-conceived lies as Emma writes a long text saying it’s fine if he’s not interested but he doesn’t have to give her false hope. Well, he is giving her some false hope, but we’ve also see him express reluctance over hanging out with her and partying with her. I can’t help but feel a little bit bad for him because even if he did make this mess himself, he also didn’t want to do the party with Emma in the first place. He’s created his own problems but they’re a result of his struggles with internalized homophobia and his need to maintain a typical heterosexual dudebro exterior. He really needs to learn to stop waffling and giving in to what people expect or want from him and start speaking up for himself, but of course he can’t quite do that until he starts being honest with himself and others.

Emma demonstrates her maturity by writing a reasonable-ish text message at 21:35, then complaining that he doesn’t answer at 22:01, then apologizing and asking him to reply at 22:18, then calling him an asshole at 22:30. This is one of my greatest personal pet peeves so I’m not exactly feeling sympathy for her at not getting a text reply within an hour. Some of us take naps or go to the movies or do stuff that requires us to be away from our phones for an hour. 

I’ve been wondering why Julie chose to write Emma the way she did, because if you think about it, Isak could have had a female “love interest” who was really cool and smart and seemingly perfect for him, if not for the fact that he’s gay and can’t make himself be interested in her. If I had to guess, I’d guess Emma is characterized like this because someone more mature or level-headed might be able to pick up on the massive hints that he isn’t into her, or in any case might not be so doggedly persistent in getting Isak’s attention. Instead, she’s beautiful and sweet enough, if ignorant in certain aspects, but she’s not someone Isak can just shake off by being distant. He has to deal with the consequences of flirting with her when he doesn’t mean it, because she won’t just go away if he ignores her. 

Additionally, I guess having a “love interest” like her only make it more obvious how right Even is for Isak, not just in the sense of Even being a boy but being someone with whom he forms a natural connection. Isak with Emma acts fake, Isak with Even acts real.

I’m not trying to hate on Emma, by the way; I know there’s an ugly side of fandom that can OTT bash her or Sonja not for their actual flaws but for existing. With Emma it’s complicated because she does do some shitty stuff later on that is legitimately worthy of criticism. Ultimately I think she doesn’t come off as well as someone like Sonja, or even Ingrid or Iben in S1, who are similarly minor characters causing problems for our POV character, but at this point in the story I still had plenty of sympathy for her. Isak is being unfair to her.

Mahdi calls Isak a traitor as he sits down and goes in on him for cancelling the party. It’s not really a surprise that Isak ended up snapping at him later in the season - obviously I love the boy squad and things worked out well and they became an adorable friendship crew, but these two clashed a lot in the first part of S3. To be fair to Mahdi, Isak has in the space of two episodes lost the group’s weed and randomly cancelled a pre-party by lying to everyone involved. Not good bro behavior. 

More to add to my theory that they’re relatively new friends and Mahdi is in this group via Jonas: he has no idea about Isak’s mom situation. I can’t remember if Magnus knows - I don’t remember him talking about it although “Magnus” has known Isak for a while if you count David’s early appearances. But even if you assume Isak is holding back on the specific details, Mahdi doesn’t seem to know that there’s anything unusual about what’s going on with his mom.

Isak is lying here again by mentioning his mom but it’s at least a convincing lie for once. He knows that Jonas will realize the seriousness of what he’s implying, and he also probably won’t press him too hard about the situation. It’s a little shitty that he uses the very serious issue of his mom’s illness - something that Jonas has helped Isak deal with firsthand - as a cover story for the real reason he bailed on Friday. But Isak’s mom is also a constant source of stress and worry for him so there is some truth in it.

Nice acting from Marlon when Jonas’ face changes as soon as Isak mentions his mom. Jonas being so protective and concerned for Isak = 💛💛💛

Mahdi of course doesn’t get it, because moms being stressed is just a thing moms do, they get upset because the kids made a mess or the car broke down or the dog dug a hole in the couch. “Stress” implies something far more mundane than the real situation with Isak’s mom.

Jonas asks simply how Isak’s mother is doing, nothing more, and Mahdi then manages to pick up from Isak’s expression and a serious shared look with Jonas that more is happening with Isak than he realizes. It’s noted in the script that he realizes here. So he drops the argument and tells Isak to just arrange a new pre-party. Case closed, as Jonas and Mahdi say!

Of course, you can tell from Isak’s expression that the case is not closed. First of all, he’s still lying to his friends. Second, how is he going to get a new pre-drink arranged with those girls when Emma is pissed off at him? Third, arranging a new pre-drink will not solve Isak’s rather large problem of not wanting to drink with Emma because he is not interested in her in the slightest.

There’s an IG post from Isak of the boys playing video games the next day, so things were chill again pretty quick.

Clip 2 - The Gay Test

This clip takes place on Mandag, 3:03, for anyone who wants to keep track of the repeating numbers.

Man, this fucking scene. This is bleak.

We start with Isak staring at the ceiling, just staring. You can imagine the million things that are on his mind. He reaches over for his phone and we get one of those biblical texts from his mom. Not as apocalyptic as usual, but still one more thing to cause him “stress” to borrow a euphemism. All these texts are both reminders that not only his mom is struggling with mental illness, she might not accept him if she knew certain facts about him. Facts which are heavily on his mind as of late.

Also, I guess Isak just sleeps in his underwear since we see it happen a few times, but the fact that he’s not dressed works for this being a very stripped down sort of scene, where Isak gets down to the heart of the matter on his laptop. Confronting ideas about his own sexuality directly even if he’s just typing them into a search engine. 

This whole clip is the definition of show, don’t tell, and Tarjei does such excellent acting here, especially considering that he’s using a pretty limited range of facial expressions and body language. Which makes sense, to be clear - he’s alone in his room at 3:03, he doesn’t need to be projecting his feelings to other characters or overreacting. But despite the fact that he’s not asked to go through a huge range here, man does this kid get across everything you need to know about what’s running through Isak’s mind. In fact the stillness works in his favor here, emphasizing his dead-inside, hopeless stare.

His acting carries this scene when there’s no voice-over or exposition to walk us through what’s happening. For instance, when Isak looks at Emma’s picture on Facebook, there’s no explanation, but we understand. He’s trying to see if he feels anything toward it, any attraction at all. He’s probably trying to make himself feel some attraction. 

We don’t actually see the search that led to him finding the gay test, but you can probably assume it was something like how to know if you’re gay or am I gay or something like that. But it might have been interesting to see exactly how he phrased it, to note the level of detachment or certainty in the phrasing.

This fucking test. A real test, by the way! The scripts have the links for the websites Isak visits in this clip, so Julie did her research. This scene was written around the existence of this crap. Did she get advised by RL gay people about the “empty closets” website while talking to members of the LGBT community for this season? Did she just Google “am I gay” and “how to get turned on by girls if you are gay” in order to find some appropriate links?

I was reluctant to give that website hits, but I did want to see exactly what the rest of the questions were, so I went through the test. 

The quiz is 20 questions and they’re all about personal grooming and style habits, gay-friendly pop culture, and avoidance of emotions. Nowhere in this quiz to determine whether someone is gay does it ask questions like “Are you attracted to men?” “Do you want to have sex with men?” “Do you fall in love with men?” Anything that has to with the actual definition of being a gay man. It is all about the stereotypes of having a “gay” personality.

Not only is this quiz is very stupid (obviously), but it also covers a very narrow perspective of what it means to be gay. A lot of the questions assume a middle- or upper-middle-class lifestyle and a selective pool of interests. It’s also an American-centric quiz and one that seems rather dated. There’s one question about who won season 1 of Project Runway - a season that aired in 2004, when Isak was five years old. How can this possibly be an accurate judge of Isak’s sexuality? But for a vulnerable teenager, it doesn’t matter that the test is ludicrous. It’s just reinforcing his worst fears of what a gay man has to be, muddling his perception of who he is. Because on the one hand, if this is what a gay man is, then Isak can’t be gay. He’s not one of those gay guys. But on the other hand, he still feels like he has to distance himself from these ideas of what gay is so he’s not seen that way. It’s all very messy. 

This part is specifically mentioned in the script: Isak hovers over the time travel question, seeming like he’s going to choose Moulin Rouge but picking Woodstock, the less “gay’ seeming option. Trying not to get too high of a score on the quiz. It’s very depressing that he needs to monitor himself like this - I mean, this is a dumbass online quiz and he’s taking it alone at night! Who cares? Sometimes I take Buzzfeed quizzes like “Design a taco and we’ll tell you what tropical fish you are” but does it tell me anything about myself if it says I’m a suckermouth catfish? No. Really he just doesn’t want this insignificant test to confirm something he already fears about himself.

Also we never see him watch any Baz Luhrmann films other than Romeo + Juliet, but I wonder if he watched Moulin Rouge and that sparked his interest in almost picking that option. Baz Luhrmann’s filmography isn’t that large; he’s directed the Red Curtain Trilogy (Strictly Ballroom, R+J, and Moulin Rouge), Australia, and The Great Gatsby, plus the pilot of The Get Down. You could watch all of his movies in a weekend. I know Isak is pretty upset and about to get focused on being “straight” but he had time to research and listen to Nas’ discography sometime this week, so it’s not unreasonable he also checked out other Baz films.

(Only three of those five films are tragedies, by the way! If Isak had stumbled upon Strictly Ballroom, perhaps this season would have turned out differently.)

If he watched Moulin Rouge, by that way, that might add some extra hesitation over the question. A reminder of Even, a reminder of these feelings that are causing him so much pain.

He’s 20% gay, which by this test’s standards is not very gay,  but probably too gay for his liking. 

how to get turned on by girls if you are gay -  I think it’s the “if you are gay” bit that makes this particularly depressing, because Isak knows what he is. He might be taking The Gay Test but really he knows he is gay. This isn’t really about him struggling with feelings for a guy for the first time and figuring out what that means about himself. This season isn’t about Isak realizing that he is gay. He’s known for a while; he’s likely known since he had a crush on Jonas, at least. It’s just that this time with Even, these feelings are coming to the forefront; this time, he almost found himself in a situation where a guy liked him back, and that leaves him with a different range of options than crushing on a straight dude where it’s “safe” in the sense that it’ll never happen. If a guy likes him back, it’s more dangerous, because something can happen. This Google search is about Isak trying to find out how to force a heterosexual side from himself despite knowing it’s fake.

In the script he does a search for “how to get turned on by girls if you are 22% gay” which I’m guessing they changed either to get the right search results on screen or because that phrasing is kind of humorous despite the topic, and it’s at odds with the serious tone of Isak’s struggle here.

Actually, I take it back. You know what is the most depressing about this part? That these are all real forums and posts from closeted gay people. Not fake websites made up for the show, as you would see in most television series. Real comments from real gay guys, talking about how to force themselves to get aroused by women. 

“I get drunk and try to focus on what is attractive about the girl. Works for me.” A real person wrote that.

I wasn’t watching this in real time yet, and I actually saw the pre-drink clip before I saw this one so I wasn’t worried about the pre-drink ending in Isak sleeping with a girl, but I can imagine a sense of foreboding from this clip? Particularly with the focus on the advice about sleeping with a girl. I can definitely imagine that it’d seem like Isak was about to make himself have sex with Emma (or another girl). I am so, so glad that Julie didn’t put Isak through that. It’s depressing enough to see him just think about it.

Clip 3 - Damage control, part 2

Ahhh, it’s the first appearance of Isak’s locker! Things are spilling out of it, he has a hard time cramming his belongings inside and keeping it shut.

So to translate the metaphor of Isak’s locker of self-acceptance: Isak knows he is gay, he has spent the past week indulging in his attraction to Even, and now he’s going to force all those feelings back inside no matter what it takes.

Also, in the script, the locker is able to be closed once Isak says he won’t host the party, so he’s closing it by turning down this opportunity to potentially hang with Even - the whole reason he got roped into hosting in the first place by asking if there would be more kosegruppa meetings.

Lmao, Isak seems incredibly stressed out by his locker, like Tarjei is breathing heavily and he has these wild eyes at the end when he turns back to Vilde. Keeping his locker shut sure must take a toll on him.

Isak blames other people for not being able to host the party instead of owning up to the real reason, which of course he would never admit out loud. He wanted to know if there would be more kosegruppa meetings, in case Even would come, but now Even is the last thing he wants to think about. With this party, Even might not only show up, but could bring his beautiful girlfriend along.

Oh, Isak. Before you told this lie, you should have counted on Eskild having contacts with Noora’s social circle. Eskild, not want to host a party? Please.

He then pins it on Linn which is at least a more believable lie. Linn is the one who asks her roommates to keep it down and wants to stay home and chill. But Vilde makes the point that Linn is depressed and doesn’t want to do anything, and it’s their job to make sure she does stuff. Which is actually very astute of Vilde. Speaking as someone who has dealt with depression, people can definitely go overboard in trying to help. Like everything, there’s a balance: you should respect the wishes of someone with depression and not think you know better than they do about how to handle their mental illness. But it’s also good to have people who want to check in on you and pull you out of your shell. Not to mention, you know, this is additional foreshadowing for the importance of mental health issues this season. 

Also let’s note that Vilde knows this probably because of her mom’s own issues, that she realizes she needs to give her mom a push sometimes. Sure, she really wants Isak to host that party. But she’s also speaking from experience. (The execution of Magnus/Vilde is annoying but in the bare bones of them, they’re both naive/silly characters who are harder to take seriously on a surface level but have a lot of hidden wisdom and maturity about certain issues.)

But Vilde also thought Even was a psychopath so she’s not perfect about mental illness, either. 

There’s a gifset of Vilde talking during this scene juxtaposed with Isak staring at her blankly and it’s one of my favorite gifsets ever. 

I will never stop laughing about how Isak just gives in to whatever Vilde asks of him.

Vilde texts him afterwards about the party and he gives one-word answers that are about as enthusiastic as his texts to Emma.

It’s freaky how much Isak is able to switch on his cool straight guy persona. Just a minute ago he was all frazzled by a battle with his locker and then losing a battle about hosting the party to Vilde, and now he’s going to be all Smooth Charming Totally Digs Girls Isak.

Lol, I’ll say this, it’s a pretty good transformation. Once he gets going I don’t see any cracks in the facade even knowing that he’s struggling internally. 

Even in his apology where he calls himself an asshole, he manages to neg her, kinda. Or whatever you’d call it with that little twist at the end implying he’s got another “cute girl” and Emma. It’s a joke but damn, fake Isak is such a little shit.

I didn’t really notice before but Isak is a little similar to Even here, getting Emma to loosen up by his big talk and charm, kind of like how Even breaks through to Isak with his story about Sonja’s aluminum leg later on. Though Isak is using a truthful story to move forward with his fake interest in Emma, and Even uses a false story to move forward with his real interest in Isak.

This clip ends on such a superficially lighthearted note but it doesn’t make you feel good. Instead it creates this sensation of dread.

This scene is so frustrating because like … Isak could have let this thing with Emma die after he canceled on her pre-drink. Sure, he would have had a first-year girl who didn’t like him, but big deal, in the scheme of things. Or he could have just apologized to her with no flirtation, been upfront about not wanting to take this thing with them further. But he creates an additional problem here by stoking Emma’s interest again. You can see this crashing and burning from a mile away.

Clip 4 - Hello dance chicks

This dance routine goes on too long, lmao, like this lasts more than a minute. Which, to be fair, is probably how it feels when you’re a closeted gay boy having to look at dancing girls because your friends like the view. But it’s also kinda like someone on the crew was like, “Hey Julie, would it be cool if we showcase my cousin and her dance team in this clip?” and Julie was too polite to say no. (This is not actually what I think happened, for the record.)

As noted in the script, this is another instance of Isak trying to make himself feel something, some bit of attraction to these physically fit, tightly-clothed girls, but all he can get out of it is fixation on weird details like the size of one girl’s hands. 

“Did he have to be so gay?” Isak, no. Don’t do this.

This is a direct consequence of crap like “the gay test” that fixates on stereotypes and maintaining a masculine image. It’s really sad that we see Isak try to promote this stuff when he’s raw with insecurity over it.

Also, dude, legit no one in your squad cares about whether that guy is gay. They’re all preoccupied with salivating over girls in activewear.

Later on in the episode we’ll hear Even criticize the act of making generalizations against gay people, something that Isak himself is doing here: generalizing that people who act like that must be gay and generalizing that people who are gay act like that. Like Emma claiming that her generalization isn’t a problem because it’s not negative, Isak tries to defend his comment once Jonas calls him on it by saying that he’s not “dissing” him but merely pointing out a fact. A very weak argument when the comment starts with Isak complaining about the guy being too gay.

Shoutout to Marlon’s utterly baffled face when Isak pulls this shit out of nowhere. It is very ironic that Jonas did encourage some of Isak’s insecurity in S1 with his comments about gay songs and going along with OG Elias’ gay jokes, but now Jonas seems to have matured beyond that behavior between seasons, and Isak, the actual gay guy, is the one left behind, struggling with internalized homophobia. 

Also, whether or not Jonas suspects Isak is gay at all at this point, it’s good that he called out his friend for saying some offensive crap. A lot of guys would laugh along or let the comment pass unchecked. S1 Jonas didn’t call out Elias and even acted like Isak was unreasonable for being upset. S3 Jonas is one hell of an upgrade on that front.

Lol, if you didn’t like Jonas in S1, S3 is his redemption arc. I was biased because I came into S1 having seen part of S3, so I knew Jonas was going to turn out to be an awesome dude. But it is really striking how the alternating POV structure can reveal different sides to characters, and Jonas is one of the characters with possibly the biggest differences revealed. Eva’s season shows Jonas at his worst; Isak’s season shows Jonas at his best. Some of that is definitely getting a year between them to account for Jonas’ increased maturity, and some of it is just being able to know Jonas in the context of a romantic relationship vs. in the context of a friendship.

Jonas mentions that Isak has been grouchy, because Jonas pays attention to his best bro’s well-being, because he cares!! So damn much!!

Mahdi is still checking out the girls and not paying a lick of attention to this Isak-Jonas argument when Even walks up, by the way. 

GODDAMMIT HENRIK, WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE SO TALL

It burns me up inside that Even was wearing the snapback before he throws it to Isak and we didn’t get to see it. Because Henrik is a long, long man. Well, mostly because Julie shot it at that angle.

On the other hand, the angle works really well to create more tension in the scene. Even is towering over Isak and the other boys. His presence is sudden and big. He’s the looming problem that Isak can’t ignore. Isak is sitting down, off-guard. Not only is Even suddenly dominating this moment that was between Isak and his friends, he and Isak are literally not on the same level, both physically and in their interaction. As helpfully pointed out in the script, “Isak doesn’t understand shit about what just happened.”

In the script, Even not only is wearing the snapback, but he sticks it on Isak when he returns it, and like, I can see why that might be considered too much (and Isak immediately panics and takes it off in the script) but god DAMN do I want to see footage where they tried it this way. 

Lmao, so did Even know where to find Isak? Or was he wandering around the school with Isak’s hat, hoping to run into him? Or wearing it just because he liked having Isak’s hat on his head?

How much do you want to bet that Isak left the snapback behind because he was desperate to get out of Even’s apartment and away from the Even/Sonja makeout session as fast as possible? 

Even, on the other hand, was probably glad to have the hat as an excuse to talk to Isak again.

This scene could have gone very differently had Even found Isak alone instead of with the boy squad. Or, looking at it another way, did Even intentionally approach Isak when he wasn’t alone in order to nullify some of the tension from the situation? Because, even apart from Sonja’s appearance, there was some serious chemistry happening on Friday, I’m sure Even fell harder for Isak than he’d even expected. But his relationship with Sonja hangs between them. Maybe he thought having other people there would make the vibe less fraught. You underestimated how much Isak does not want his bros to know, Even. 

The way the atmosphere changes when Even walks in … you can feel Isak’s blood freeze. He just watches Even toss the snapback to him with no effort to catch it because he’s too shocked by what’s happening. He’s so panicked he can come up with absolutely no lies to salvage this situation.

Even is bouncing a little after he approaches Isak, which seems to be a nervous gesture for him. He might seem like the cool confident dude, and sure, Even is often confident and makes the first moves in his pursuit of Isak. But he’s also got a lot of deep-rooted vulnerability. If something happens with Isak … it’ll mean he has to end things with Sonja, a person who has seen Even at his lowest points and still accepts him, cutting off a relationship that has been a source of stability and support despite its serious flaws. And it’ll mean taking a chance on a new person who might not be so okay with the parts of himself Even hates the most.

Even, bless him, reads the tense situation without Isak saying anything. Even though they’re not on the same page, Even can at least tell that Isak is hiding something from his friends. This is one of those early moments that made me really like him - how easily and quickly he can read the room and especially what Isak is feeling, and can act quickly to help him out, similar to how Even handles Emma wanting to pair off with Isak at kosegruppa. He’s a very perceptive person. And he throws out a lie for Isak very casually and shrugs it off and walks away.

Isak is very confused by this encounter, and with scenes where Isak has no idea what’s happened I like to consider Even’s unseen side of the story (to be fair, I like to consider that for ... pretty much all scenes). So I’m trying to imagine what Even wanted or expected from this moment. This is the first scene where he’s interacting with Isak after a life-changing Friday afternoon where they got to know each other and fell hard for each other. That meeting ended with Even’s long-term girlfriend came by, bringing a cold dose of reality to this magical afternoon. So what does Even think will happen when he finds Isak again? What does he hope will happen?

I think from Even’s POV, this certainly wasn’t what he wanted to happen the next time he spoke to Isak. Isak was very clearly not happy with Even’s presence in that moment, which is never a great feeling. But if Even turned this moment over in his head - what was that all about? - he would have to consider that Isak was hiding something from his friends, specifically that he hung out with Even on Friday. So why didn’t Isak want to tell them? What’s so objectionable about two guys randomly hanging out and smoking weed together? Because if there wasn’t anything to hide, why couldn’t Isak just say, “Oh, thanks for returning my hat, hey guys, this is Even?” So then Even would run through the possibilities. Maybe Isak had other plans with these guys, and he bailed on them. But then why did he bail? Because he didn’t want to hang with them, or because he really wanted to hang with Even? Orrrrr …. Was there something else to that afternoon that Isak feels he can’t tell his friends about, and if so, what was that?

IDK, if I were in Even’s shoes, I would be analyzing the hell out of what just happened trying to pick out some meaning from it. And I think while I might be really hurt and disappointed in the moment, when I had been semi-rejected by Isak, if I thought about it further, I might feel a spark of hope over Isak’s reaction. Because maybe this feeling isn’t one-sided. Maybe that afternoon had more significance to Isak than just a fun hangout.

Of course this is all assuming Even is like me and obsesses over the little details of a confusing social interaction. He might have just thought, “Time to try again!” and started picking out the perfect outfit for Friday. We don’t get any clues between this scene and Even showing up at the party to tell us what he might have been thinking. 

The script makes it clear that Jonas remembers that Isak was wearing the snapback when they left the school on Friday, therefore realizing that Even was lying. Let’s applaud Jonas’ observational skills because tbh, I would not remember what hat my friends were wearing last week unless it was super out of the ordinary. I guess if one of them were borrowing my own hat I might mentally keep track of it? Still, Jonas is killing it this season with recognizing stuff’s up with Isak.

Isak and Jonas share clothes and I love it, by the way 💛💛💛

Isak calling Even “just some revue nerd from Vilde’s group” stings, man. I know he is obviously lying and Even is already so much more to him, but I’m glad Even wasn’t around to hear that. Like Isak dismissing Even that way is painful on Isak’s part, too. If only Even was “just some revue nerd” Isak wouldn’t be feeling like shit.

Honestly, bless Magnus for interrupting this miserable scenario with his weird-ass BDSM dreams. If ever there was a time where you needed your goofball friend to start talking about getting tied up and punished with a whip, this is it.

Some of Isak’s reaction to Magnus’ story seems like Tarjei laughing at his friend David delivering these ridiculous lines and some of it seems like he and Jonas can’t help but look at each other all are you hearing this shit and at one point it seems like Isak casts a look at Jonas as if to be like so are we done with the topic of gay people and my bad attitude and the revue nerd now? Are you distracted enough to forget it for now? Are we cool?

That whole moment with Even happened so quickly, you know that it was one of those incidents that goes by fast and is hard to process while it’s occurring. But as we later learn, it stuck with Jonas for a while.

So far, Isak has lied or taken part in a lie in every single clip this week: his mom’s “stress,” the gay test (lying to himself or trying to figure out how to live a lie), lying to Vilde about why he can’t host the party, lying to Jonas about who Even is and when Even got his snapback.

Clip 5 - Neon pre-game

This was the first Skam clip I ever saw!

The clip popped up in my recommendations on YouTube, and I was pulling an Isak and messing around on my laptop late at night, so I decided to watch. I fully expected to watch for a minute and then switch to something else, but no, this one clip had me hooked.

I know this is just like, a fun party theme where all the kids can get dressed up in wacky wigs and bright colors, but I think there’s something to both this scene and the 21:21 clip in the next episode that the setting is out of the ordinary and that allows the flirtation between Isak and Even to escalate.  In this clip, it’s a party, the lights are turned down, everyone’s dressed unusually. Things are already out of the norm. It’s because things aren’t ordinary that this situation with Isak and Even can be pushed a little farther. It’s when the lights are low and everyone’s dancing with painted faces that Isak and Even can lock eyes while they’re kissing girls because it’s something off from their usual reality. When the lights come up and the music’s off and everyone’s grabbing their coats to leave and go back into the rest of the world, breaking the spell, and Even levels that stare at Isak - that’s too real, that makes Isak look away. But it’s that slightly surreal, slightly dreamy vibe that allows for Isak and Even to take a step forward.

I love seeing Linn dressed up and socializing! Vilde was right, she needed a push.

Chris is here, but not Kasper, which is probably just due to actor availability since he’s mentioned in the script. It would have been nice to get some more insight into that relationship and especially what ended it, since we get so little of Chris’ inner life. I mean, Vilde/Magnus is also a “joke” relationship in a lot of respects and we still got more of a clue of why they might have something genuine besides a shared interest in TMI.

The script had Jonas calling Isak and Isak presumably ignoring him, a detail that is left out of the final clip. Jonas does mention that he tried to call Isak in a clip next episode, though.

Notice we open the dialogue with Isak asking Emma what music she likes, aka the question that Even asked him on Friday. Which is a common enough icebreaker, but I don’t think these facts are unrelated! Like I realize Isak has dating experience but really Isak takes a lot of cues from Even in navigating a real romantic relationship, little things that come up later on. And also, as much as Isak might be trying to be straight, trying to make it work with Emma, his mind is clearly drifting back to that afternoon with Even. How right it must have felt compared to this thing with Emma or with other girls, and how, maybe without even thinking about it much, he’s referring back to his interaction to Even as a model of how to flirt.

Lmao I mean, Justin Bieber ain’t my favorite musical artist either, but I feel like Isak’s reaction to Emma being a fan is so typical of dudes. I will give Emma some credit, she laughs off his teasing and doesn’t get too insecure about his comments, at least not visibly. And when he asks her about ‘90s hip-hop she admits she doesn’t know much about it instead of pretending to (ISAK).

Isak also sounds like a typical dude when talking about his musical tastes to Emma. However, Isak suddenly being an expert on Nas is the funniest shit ever. Emma, let me tell you all about the greatest musical artist ever, who I learned about a week ago! Tarjei plays this moment really well because I kinda cringed and I also laughed really hard.

It also shows that, even with Isak taking gay tests and trying to flirt with Emma this week, he found time to research and listen to Nas, someone important to Even.

In the script Vilde throws herself at Even into a hug when he enters and then it’s mentioned that “Vilde awkwardly greets Sonja,” which is kind of a random detail. I guess the awkwardness comes from Vilde launching herself too enthusiastically into a hug at Even in front of his girlfriend? Was Vilde supposed to be kinda thirsty for Even, thinking he was a single dude and wanting to get with someone (out of jealousy at her friends hooking up)?

The script also has Isak deliberately ignore Even when he tries to say hi, which wouldn’t have worked with the positioning of the actors in this scene, but it’s obviously colder than what we get here.

Looking ahead to S4, I’m still on the fence about how much Julie really thought about the Sana-Even connection - there are things that make me think she did plan it to a degree, there are things that seem retconned - but I’ve never thought this moment of Sonja introducing herself to Sana has to be a big inconsistency with Even and Sana knowing each other. All he had to do was tell Sonja beforehand that Sana would be at the party and that he didn’t want to call attention to the fact that they knew each other before he went to Nissen, and she probably would have agreed to play along like they were strangers.

I think Emma placed Isak’s hand on her boob because he momentarily stopped paying attention to her by looking at Even. But I don’t think she realized why he stopped paying attention to her.

Emma: “My bra will be bothering me until I can TAKE IT OFF I mean just a suggestion really it’d be so welcome to get out of it ha ha ha.”

I was going to laugh and say Isak could not look less interested in touching Emma’s boob but then I took another look at Tarjei’s face and remembered that Isak is supposed to be forcing himself to be turned on by girls, and mentally he was probably thinking okay, here’s your chance, focus and suddenly it got a lot less funny.

Jesus Lord, that look Even sends Isak from across the room while draping his jacket over his shoulder. While clad in that tight white T-shirt. He means business. No mystery at all why Isak takes that moment to gulp down his beer and start making out with Emma. This is certainly a challenge Isak is undertaking for himself, trying to be straight, but it’s also a fuck-you to Even (and not in the way Even wants). Hey Even, we flirt all afternoon and then your girlfriend comes in? Then you bring her to my apartment and give me that look across the room? Well, fuck you, I’m not dealing with your mixed signals now.

There is such a clear difference between when Isak makes out with girls versus when he kisses Even. With Emma here (and with Sara in S2) you can see how calculated it is; the way Isak rubs his hands over her back, the way he tilts his head in a coordinated way, the length of the kisses. It feels entirely like a performance with those girls, like there’s something cerebral about it, his mind is working on how to make it seem real from the outside. When Isak eventually kisses Even, it just seems like he’s … not thinking. Or maybe he’s thinking, but not because he’s trying to perform. With Even, Isak just wants to kiss him. He’s not worried about making it look good, he’s concentrated on how good it feels, and he’s just reacting on instinct with what his body wants. 

I would pay to see a version of this scene where Even plops down on the sofa and Emma is like, “Endre, Isak was just telling me about Nas, he says he made the best album of all time!”

Also, it wouldn’t have worked with Isak’s POV, but don’t you wish we could have seen Even’s face when he noticed Isak had his hand on Emma’s boob, and especially when Isak broke their loaded eye contact to make out with Emma? Like can you imagine on Even’s end, when he’s kind of still in that conversational bubble with Sonja and Vilde, how he burst out of it? OK GOTTA BLAST BYEEEEEEE

And then he launches across the room like he’s auditioning for The Flash.

“I’m starting to think you’re bonding too much” Subtle, Even.

“I thought we were a team?” SUBTLE.

Even does do an admirable job of trying to seem cheerful and not possessive or jealous, but you can see him deflate a little once he shakes Isak’s shoulder and compliments his apartment and Isak is just not having it, and meanwhile Emma gets to lean in to Isak taking advantage of that proximity. 

Lmao, can you imagine if these three actually attempted to bake bread or whatever for kosegruppa? All the passive-aggressiveness and competing for Isak’s attention, and Isak wanting to sink into the floor? I’ll say it again, I will never not feel a little cheated that we didn’t get more actual kosegruppa shenanigans.

It’s kinda funny that Emma is raving about Eskild considering they could have met only like an hour or so ago. And already she’s like “HE’S GAY, LIFE OF THE PARTY!”

Shout out to Eskild, Linn, and Chris’ dancing though. Loves of my life right there.

Even is honestly a very nice person, I think kindness is one of his defining qualities, but man, he does not care for Emma. Though even when he’s calling her out on her generalizing about gay people, he’s not being excessively rude to her? He’s not calling her homophobic or ignorant or anything, he’s just challenging her and explaining to her why it’s offensive. And he’s justified in doing so anyway, it’s not like he targeted her over something stupid. What she’s saying affects him as a pansexual person.

Actually, Emma harboring generalizations about gay people is perhaps part of why she didn’t consider that the boy turning down a blowjob from her and giving her mixed messages might be gay. He’s not ~hilarious and fitting into her ideas about gay people. To be clear, I’m not trying to put all the blame on her, because Isak is also randomly making out with her and encouraging her crush on him, too. But she’s just got a limited view of gay people and their experiences, as evidenced by other stuff later in the season.

Man, the way Isak’s head turns when Even calls Emma out on using superficial generalizations. This conversation is just what he needed to hear at this moment. That his paranoia over stuff like the gay test, his criticisms of the dance instructor for seeming too gay, all of that crap, are wrong. They’re inaccurate. Just because he likes guys does not mean Isak has to be this way or that way. That he can be an individual rather than having to cram himself into boxes that don’t fit. That if he identifies as gay, it doesn’t mean that everyone can sum up his existence by that one adjective. And he’s hearing it from exactly the best person who could say it at this moment: the guy he likes. Imagine what a relief it is to know not only that Even doesn’t buy into this bullshit, but also that he will vocally speak out against it. And you know that Isak is also wondering more about whether Even is not straight based on this conversation because it sounds like Even has given this topic a lot of thought.

Also when Emma is objecting to Even’s comments, she turns back to Isak, maybe for reinforcement, or maybe because she doesn’t want to lose an argument in front of him, and he quickly lowers his gaze, because he doesn’t want to seem too interested in what Even is saying. But of course Isak is intensely interested. Emma isn’t even quite in focus in some of these shots. It’s all Isak zeroing in on Even’s perspective.

Even also uses the “All Muslims are terrorists” example as a comparison, and it was one of the moments that people took as potential evidence that Even had an interest in Islam and possibly knew Sana. After S4, we know that this example is personal to him because his best friends were Muslims and experienced the harm from those generalizations.

Additionally, if you consider that Even had a suicidal episode prior to this season that had something to do with shame over liking boys, this is quite a bit of self-reflection to have gained in the meantime. I’m not sure we ever learn exactly when Even’s suicide attempt took place (like what month and exactly how much school he missed)? But in the period between the suicide attempt and S3, Even appeared to have gained a lot of acceptance about his sexuality.

As I said above, this is the first Skam clip I ever saw, and this moment right here, with Even and Emma talking on the couch, was the one that really grabbed my attention. I was impressed with this part because it seemed to have more nuance and maturity than a lot of similar takes on homophobia - I feel like a lot of shows sometimes still don’t get that positive generalizations are still generalizations? And I definitely feel like many shows’ characters wouldn’t have a discussion about it. 

And for what it’s worth, I really liked Even after this exchange and it’s one of many moments that made it harder for me to think that he was two-timing or using Isak. This seemed very genuine and thoughtful, and like he was someone who had strong investment in the topic. 

Not to drag Emma too much again, but her calling this conversation “boring” is something that makes me, well, less than fond of her. In fact I find her calling this conversation boring and flouncing away a lot worse than making a generalization about gay people in the first place. Because people do say offensive things out of ignorance; Isak certainly says his fair share of crap regarding gay people this season. But people can also be educated about these points. For instance, Isak takes Eskild’s Pride speech seriously. It’s that Emma doesn’t take Even’s comments seriously that’s bad. That she doesn’t want to confront that she may be perpetuating harmful ideas. I don’t expect her to fall over herself apologizing but this conversation has not permeated her brain at all. This isn’t a “boring” conversation to Isak, who is gay, and who needs this conversation at the moment. The fact that Emma can call it boring and walk away is some massive straight privilege. I don’t want to demonize her too much because she is only like 16, but yeah, girl is very ignorant about LGBT issues. 

HERE WE GO, ANOTHER ICONIC S3 MOMENT.

I never really noticed but at the beginning of Call Your Girlfriend, when we’re watching Isak bop along (adorably), you can see Even’s neon bandanna at the side of the frame, out of focus. It reminds me a lot of shots where we are firmly in Isak’s POV, such as in the Talk Show Host courtyard walk, where part of Isak’s head is at the side of the frame out of focus, almost like we’re watching over his shoulder, or directly seeing through his eyes. So this moment in Call Your Girlfriend, whether intentional or not, almost seems like we’re watching through Even’s eyes as he looks at Isak dancing. It doesn’t work perfectly, since Isak eventually looks off to the side at Even (and not at the camera) but I like to think of Even watching Isak as he danced with Emma, turning back to Sonja a moment before Isak looked over at Even.

So I love the Evak nose rubs as much as anyone, that’s their special thing, but Even does it here to Sonja as they’re dancing. My headcanon is going to be that Isak saw this and deliberately instigated it with Even in the bed scene as a way of making it theirs. I really think Isak takes a lot of cues from Even, as mentioned earlier, more than he realizes consciously.

Also, while I think Even making out with Sonja at the end of S2 was for Sonja’s benefit, in this scene I think a lot of the Even/Sonja making out is a performance for Isak. Which is not really fair to Sonja, but well, there you go. Even saw Isak making out with Emma, he suspects it was for show (if nothing else he knows Isak was not enthused to be in a kosegruppa group with Emma and so his interest probably isn’t genuine), and this is his way of saying two can play that game.

never 4get the iconic script line by Julie in reference to Isak’s dancing, “lol Tarjei”

THIS SONG, by the way. This song is a jam anyway but talk about those completely on-point lyrics.

This is one of those diegetic music moments where the characters are listening to the music inside the scene. What makes it work so damn well is because Even knows this song and is deliberately making eye contact with Isak at the most apropos lyrics. You can’t tell me otherwise. It’s not just the soundtrack coincidentally happening to sync up and be lyrically relevant for the viewers, it’s the song syncing up within the scene itself, at the party - that would be loaded enough, but Even is also putting on a show for Isak here. There’s a reason he turns Sonja in place and looks at Isak exactly at the line “and now it’s gonna be me and you.” Yeah, I know I’m with her, Isak, and I know you’re with her, but I feel you looking at me, and I’m gonna look back. 

I mean Even, Gabrielle’s #1 fan, knows how to communicate meaningfully via pop songs to the object of his affection.

Possibly my favorite part is right after that scorching eye contact, when you can see Isak has just been struck to the core by Even looking at him, and then he closes his eyes and goes back to kissing Emma. Because you know he’s imagining he’s kissing someone else.

I feel bad for Sonja and Emma here but at least they remained happily oblivious to the boys eye-fucking each other across the room while making out with them. 

There’s not enough Eva in this season so let’s appreciate how gosh darn cute she is with her yellow hair bow.

Also Sana is so precious with her face paint and dimples!

How did Isak not burst into flames when Even looked across the room at him like that? The most smoldering look of the clip, for my money. That is the gaze of a man who knows what (who) he wants and is not shy to show it. Also note Isak quickly looking away and then “surreptitiously” back to Even a moment later, when Even has looked away and is deciding to play it more cool.

Emma touches Sonja’s teeth which is kind of weird, although Sonja does have very nice teeth! But I mean, even my close friends probably wouldn’t just touch my teeth for fun, let alone someone I just met. I assume this was something to do with the blacklight? Sonja’s teeth were very bright in the dark? Or else Emma is interested in amateur dentistry.

Lmao when Emma suggests Isak take a taxi with her, Sonja, and Even, you can imagine that is the absolute last scenario Isak would enjoy right now, Emma trying to get into his pants and Even mentally undressing him while Sonja is right there.

Here we goooooooo with another memorable Evak kitchen scene! Julie sure loves to have people flirt in kitchens, huh.

Guys, I got butterflies watching this scene. I don’t know how many times I’ve seen it, but part of me is still like are they going to kiss????

“Didn’t you take a taxi with the others?” “I have a bike.” Lmao I don’t believe that.

I can FEEL the tension coming off the screen. Like I can imagine everything Isak is feeling here. The nerves, the attraction, the pull toward Even. Trying to fight it, trying to maintain some detachment.

You can imagine Isak’s heart beating so fast. SHIT Even is right here, in his personal space, they’re alone together.

Even asks about Isak having a good time with Emma - funny because we all know, and he knows, that Isak just made out with Emma while staring at Even. It’s a joke, an inquiry that would seem harmless except for the massive irony. Also not a joke because Even really is kind of jealous and Isak plays off his comment. No matter if they’re aware of this thing between them, Isak is still making out with someone other than Even and it stings.

The acting here is so so SO good. Isak is like “why are you telling me about this” when Even starts talking about Sonja, he’s cautious, he’s trying not to give himself away. Meanwhile Even is trying to find a way to break through to Isak. He’s trying to communicate that he doesn’t want to be with her, but that it’s complicated. And when Isak is not having it, he switches to making an outlandish joke about it. Both of them communicate these shifts so well with their microexpressions, body language, tone of voice, etc.

There’s so much delicious subtext in this scene! This is one of Skam’s strengths - we know what’s going on in this scene, they don’t need to spell it out for us with lots of straighforward expository dialogue because the strength of the acting, the pacing, and the carefully chosen dialogue tells us everything we need to know. On a very instinctive level, we can tell when Isak becomes more on edge or when he lowers his guard; we can tell when Even decides he needs to try a new tactic in getting through to Isak.

Even and Sonja’s relationship is pretty complex even if we don’t get many glimpses at it up close and personal - you have to take a lot of it in bits and pieces, based on what Even says, what Sonja says, what Isak sees. I think they really needed to break up whether or not Isak was in the picture, but the thing is, I can completely understand why Even feels he can’t break up with her. She’s the one who stood by him through his episodes, throughout a terrible point of his life, and he probably feels like he owes her or that it’s wrong to leave her after all that. Adding to that, she’s one of the most stable factors in his life - after losing his friends, having to change schools, having to repeat his final year, dealing with manic/depressive episodes, etc. And because Sonja calls the shots, she’s someone he can rely on. He’s used to her taking control and telling him what’s real and not real. He’s got so much insecurity about his mental illness and he’s used to Sonja for support, so you can imagine how it’d be hard to cut himself off from her judgment. How is he supposed to stand on his own? She’s his aluminum leg.

Again, Even thinking quickly on his feet, spinning this ridiculous yarn about Sonja’s aluminum leg. He really gets into it! And this dumb story does melt the tension so beautifully, so kudos to Even for being a giant weirdo.

That is a damn fine delivery by Tarjei on Isak’s confused “What?” Precious.

As has been analyzed many times, Even’s story about Sonja’s aluminum leg is not really about his girlfriend’s fake prosthetic limb. He’s talking about himself and his bipolar disorder. She’s doing a lot better now (Even is doing a lot better after his manic/depressive episodes at Elvebakken and his suicide attempt). She’s gotten a lot of help from physiotherapists (Even has presumably been to some mental health specialists. Although it would be nice to know this for certain! Something I always wanted more of - info on Even’s mental health treatment plan.) You can hardly see she limps (Even seems like a swaggering confident young man and at first glance you would not be able to see his mental health struggles or vulnerabilities).

Notice how Even moves in subtly closer to Isak after Isak’s clued in on the joke, and that the camera zooms in a bit as well, making us feel the distance closing. I think even Isak notices and needs a second to adjust (after Even says he could’ve joked about something way worse, he kind of sputters out a reply, which could be disbelief or could also be him taking a second to re-calibrate with Even RIGHT THERE OMG).

This is how you do on-screen chemistry. Tarjei and Henrik are really feeding off each other, responding to each other’s movements and eye contact, making this conversation seem natural.

Regarding Even’s comment about Sonja having a dick and that this would be way too far to joke about - I definitely get why this comment would bother people. I think part of the joke is that Even is quite fine with dick and “going too far” is ironic when Even keeps joking about dick and balls, including making a blowjob joke within seconds of his first conversation with Isak. Their reactions make it clear that talking about dick is a lot more charged when there’s all this sexual tension floating around in the kitchen. But the comment is somewhat jarring and is worded in an unfortunate way that’s close to common transphobic arguments.

Isak not being able to look at Even at this point slays me. He tries it for a second but quickly looks back down. Even is too close, Isak is too attracted to him, this tension between them is too thick, Even’s girlfriend is too much of an obstacle and it’s too hard to think about how Even can’t break up with her, and all his plans for this week about how to get turned on by Emma, how to act straight, are unraveling so fast because this thing with Even is too real. It’s too much.

And when Isak says Sonja’s name it’s palpable how much this situation upsets him. Sonja is very sweet and cute. She’s Even’s very nice girlfriend who he can’t dump. No matter if they’re flirting and there’s all this tension, she’s the elephant in the room. It’s like it’s the fact that Isak is clearly struggling and not even able to look at him that makes Even decide to kiss him, because he knows what it means. Show him it’s not about Sonja anymore. My heart hurts at how resolutely Isak keeps his head down, even when Even moves in for the kiss.

Can I just say I love the sound effects in this scene? Or rather, lack thereof? I think you can hear the door unlocking at one point, for Noora, but otherwise the silence, just their breathing, every inch they move, all of that is so perfect. Like this is all being laid bare, it’s hard to hide anymore when it’s just the two of them and there are no distractions.

I adore Julie’s bit in the script about Isak looking down at the hole in the sock. ADORE IT. I can completely see it even if it’s not physically shown on screen. I know it’s mostly to get Tarjei into Isak’s mindset but damn that bit is so perfect. 

Though this is the part in the season where I’m like, OK, Even should’ve broken up with Sonja. Even though I completely get why he doesn’t from a character perspective! The previous episodes contained this nebulous getting-to-know-you phase where I can accept Even still being with Sonja to a degree even if there is some emotional cheating going on, even if he’s deliberately trying to get close to Isak. But trying to kiss someone? That’s when you need to decide if you want to call it quits with your old partner or pursue this new person. Although again, I get why he wanted to be REALLY FUCKING CERTAIN before he broke up with her, considering it’s not easy to end this relationship and the last time he made a move on a boy, things did not end well.

Imagine being a Norwegian Skam fan and following S2 and being obsessed with Noora’s story which is this national phenomenon, and then S3 starts and Noora’s just gone, not only out of focus but gone, out of the damn country, and you miss her and want to see her again, and maybe you’re not really keen on this Isak kid but after a few episodes you’re warming up to him and his budding romance with Even is really cute and you hope they get together and then there’s this scene packed full of sexual tension and they’re about to finally kiss and it feels like ages even though it’s only been like three weeks and that is when some jackass interrupts this almost-kiss and you’re going to murder whoever did it and that is when you get your beloved Noora back. I mean. A+ trolling, Julie.

What did Even think of Noora, anyway, with that look he shoots Isak? Just a general “who is this and why is she preempting our makeouts” or is he wondering if she’s Isak’s ex or something?

I think so much about what happened right after this scene! How awkward was Even’s leaving? It seems from the next clip (at the start of episode 4) that they talked about hanging out the next day? I wonder if that was supposed to be a text message or something that didn’t make it into the social media updates. Did Even go home by himself, or did he go find Sonja and the others? I’m not sure if that’s clear from the texts. What would have happened if Noora came home like a minute later, after they’d kissed - would Even have broken up with Sonja immediately or 

I used to wonder when Isak got Even’s phone number. For a while I thought he had Even listed as “Even Kosegruppa” in his phone because he got his number at the first kosegruppa meeting - that seems pretty early in their relationship, but it’s also the only period of time where he didn’t know Even’s full name, and it would have made sense to call him “Even Kosegruppa” seeing that’s the only context he knew him at that point. But it did seem strange to me that they would have exchanged numbers but Isak wouldn’t be shown freaking out over this, or Even wouldn’t have “casually” contacted Isak. So now I’m thinking they only exchanged numbers after this party scene, when they were tentatively making plans to hang out the next day. Tbh I could totally see Even putting himself as “Even Kosegruppa” in Isak’s phone to be funny. Because clearly this connection between them has escalated and there’s a joke in suggesting that Isak needs to be reminded how he knows Even - oh yeah, that guy from kosegruppa - when they both know it’s more than that. And Isak would of course never change it.

The song over the credits (”Lite og Stort” by No. 4) is about finding your way back home, which is literally Noora’s situation right now. I think the lyrics are specifically about “home” meaning Norway as a country? I’m going off the English translation, though, feel free to correct if I’m missing something. 

Anyway this scene hooked me. I was blown away by their acting in the kitchen scene, I was floored by the level of chemistry. Despite not knowing anything that came before this scene, I needed to have these characters kiss! And I loved the pacing and the dialogue, how natural it all felt. I distinctly remember thinking. “Now this is the kind of television I like to watch.”

General Comments:

This week has one of my favorite uses of social media, the “If you don’t remember her name in the morning take her to Starbucks” picture. It went up after the clip with the dance chicks. Utterly perfect deployment, Isak posting that right when he’s concerned about seeming straight. All performative, all BS.  

Isak lies to the guys about the party, claiming he’s going home to chill and do washing. Magnus even mentions that there’s a revue party happening but Isak fails to mention that he’s hosting it.

Emma messages Isak after she’s left the pre-drink asking him where he is and later drunk texts him telling him he’s great and wanting to go over and be with him at like 3 a.m. Isak, you dug that hole yourself.

Isak asks Emma how everything went after the neon pre-drink and Emma is like, “Sonja is so cool!” and immediately Isak is all “I have to go now.” Sonja’s awesomeness is not something he wants to hear about in detail.

I didn’t realize but there’s an IG post from Magnus on Friday showing Mahdi hooking up with a girl and Magnus calling himself a third wheel. I didn’t remember Mahdi ever hooking up on screen with anyone so I mean, I’m glad he got some during the show?

I own exactly one Funko Pop (Brienne of Tarth) and I know this would never happen outside of my dreams but I would kill for some Skam Funkos, particularly of the last clip of this episode, with Even’s white T-shirt and neon bandanna and Isak’s pink paint streaks and Illuminati shirt. Complete with Noora for that special cock-blocking authenticity.

This is a total tangent, but I’ve been looking up Baz Luhrmann stuff for these recaps and did you know that there’s a Moulin Rouge stage musical that literally just premiered? As in, yesterday, July 10? Starring Aaron Tveit as Christian? I have left my middle school Moulin Rouge obsession out of these recaps but I’m wondering how a live musical version is going to work. There’s a ton of it that would translate fine but then I feel like a Moulin Rouge without Baz Luhrmann giving you motion sickness with his wild-ass editing and cinematography is missing that special something.

#skam reactions #skam season 3 #skam #isak valtersen #evak

[hp-fanficc]

Tutoring Troubles - Chapter 1

As Hermione levitated the last of her posters in the library, she was really hoping that someone would reply to her offer to tutor them for exams. She was willing to teach any subject, up to practice OWL exams, as she was already preparing for her own. The library was about to close, and she sighed as she made her way back to the Gryffindor Common Room. Truth be told, while studying with someone would be beneficial, she could really use the money, and the sooner the better

Draco had noticed Hermione putting up posters around the school for the past hour and couldn't help but find it slightly amusing. When noticing her on her way back to the Gryffindor common room, he thought he'd have a little fun. "Not had enough time making yourself feel smarter than others, granger?" He called after her, the smile lingering on his lips

Hermione swiveled on the spot upon hearing her name, but immediately regretted it. She started to turn away without saying anything, surely Draco Malfoy would know nor care about her money issues, with his royalties and parents sending him anything he desired as fast his owl could deliver it.

"Going to ignore me now?" He asked, walking towards her while his grin played on his lips. "Now tell me, why do you want to tutor people? Isnt doing weasleys homework enough for you?"

"If you're not going to inquire about the service, just walk away, Malfoy." She said, an exasperated tone to her voice. She really had quite enough to deal with to put up with him, on top of it all.

He couldnt help but laugh. "And how would i inquire?" He asked, his tone quite jokey still

She turned around. "Do you need help in any subject, advancing from first year to OWL-level?" She asked in a curt fashion.

"I might do. I'm more interested in how i would ask for your... Help" he said simply, hiding the fact that he was honestly asking instead of annoying her

"It's tutoring, Malfoy. I'm not going to complete your assignments for you." she answered point-blank, assuming that's what he'd want

Nevermind then" he shrugged, walking away from her. "Good luck getting clients" he said over his shoulder as he heads towards the dungeons

The next day in potions, Draco sat with his head quite low as he struggled to get the instructions to work with what was happening in his cauldron. Snape has swept by the Gryffindor table giving his usual snide remarks to Harry and Ron, and kept silent at Hermione's cauldron, meaning he found nothing to criticize. "Just ignore it.." Hermione said softly to her friends as Snape walked on. After Draco himself received a disappointed look and a grunt off Snape, he walked away. Draco turned off his cauldron and sat in silence at the back of the room with his head on the table. As the bell rang, they started to pack up and Hermione, passing the Slytherin table, scrunched up her nose. Someone's potion had failed horribly, not that Snape would dare subtract points from his precious house. Draco waved his wand, quickly clearing the potion when seeing Hermione scrunch her nose. "Looking at something?" He asked, raising an eyebrow at her She shook her head quickly. Now wasn't the time to instigate anything, right under Snape's nose. Even Harry and Ron knew better.

After about half an hour, an owl was sent off draco to find hermione at her dorm later that night. He didn't want people knowing he needed a bit of help from the gryffindor princess. "Meet me in the library at nine." Hermione read this over and over. She wasn't sure if it was a serious offer, or an attempt for someone to catch her out of bounds, after the library had closed. Only one way to find out. "Hey Harry..."

She stood in front of the library in Harry's invisibility cloak at 8:50. Either this person would show up, or they wouldn't. Draco entered the library at 8:55 and hung in the shadows as he looked around for hermione. Maybe she was coming. As students started to filter through the hallways back to their dorms the only one staying put was Draco Malfoy. She wasn't quick to trust it was him but as he, too, continued to stay he had just as much risk of getting caught. Taking off the cloak behind a pillar, Hermione emerged and walked towards him calmly. He raised an eyebrow as she approached him. "Nice to see that you came" he said simply, his eyes glided to her

"So you were the client, then?"

He gave a quick nod before moving to sit on a table near her. "Yes but before anything else, we need to talk conditions" he said firmly

"Yes, and somewhere more private."

"Where would be better for you?" He asked curiously. "Slytherin dorms?" He asked with a smug look

"Ha ha..." She led him to an abandoned classroom. He followed her silently, a grin playing on his lips as he noticed Hermione's unease to being out after hours.

"Firstly, how much does it cost for your silence to helping me and sneaking around so no one sees us together?" He asked bluntly, walking towards her.

"Technically, it wouldn't cost anything extra." she replied honestly. "What subject do you need help with?"

"Im not talking technically, think of it as compensation" he suggested, not letting her move on yet

"What I meant to say," she put it more plainly "is that I wasn't going to disclose anyone's information, anyway"

He rolled his eyes. "Is 30 Galleons a session enough?" He asked, sitting on the table and having hermione stand in front of him

She stared with her eyes as wide as the Galleons. "That's more than what I was going to charge, honestly."

"What's your rate?" He asked casually, knowing it won't make much difference to what he'll pay

"5 galleons per session" she replied honestly

He couldn't help but laugh slightly. "Because of your moral and that I'm going to have you sneaking round after hours with me and lie to your little friends about where you are, ill pay 30 a night" he said softly in her ear

"D-done"

He couldn't help but smirked at her stutter. "I think you noticed how badly im doing at potions this year so that's where im going to need your skills" he said simply, still whispering in her ear. "Do you have any rules?" He asked curiously

"Where exactly are you having trouble?" She raised her head up, opening the book

"You didnt answer my question. Are you sure thats wise not to have any rules of your own?" He asked playfully. "You never know what may happen"

"I'll let you know if I think of any." She replied curtly.

He shook his head and laughed. "Right, its not that um struggling but i cant seem to get the instructions to go from book to cauldron without messing up" he admitted.

"The application is the hardest part for sure, but with lots of concentration is it possible. Additionally, understanding the principles will serve you better than just following the instructions"

He gave her a curious look, running his hand through his hair. So where do you think we should start?" He asked, suddenly feeling more unsure and vulnerable infront of her than what he was comfortable with. She leafed until she reached the current chapter. "did you have difficulty understanding this?"

He glanced down at the page and frowned slightly, reading the instructions without saying anything to her. "Granger, im struggling in practical not theory" he pointed out. "Im fine with copying a text book"

"But that's my point, you have to understand it before you can apply it!"

"What are you talking about Granger"?" he sighed, his hand running through his hair. "So getting high marks on the essay isnt the right thing to do?"

"Not if you're just memorizing facts without any comprehension? what, do you think you'll spend the rest of your life just blindly following orders without understanding wh-" she cut herself off, and dropped her gaze back the book.

He placed his fingers under her chin and lifted her face to look at him. "Finish what you were saying" he said bluntly, staring her in the eyes

"Look, we're not here to talk about what you're planning on doing after you leave school." She said equally as blunty

He rolled his eyes. "Never shy away from finishing your sentence. It annoys me far to quickly" he warned. "I'd rather you say it and tell me not to take notice instead of cutting yourself off" he said simply, still holding her chin

"And I'd rather we focused on the subject at hand." She said, moving her face back, out of his reach.

He nodded. "So what do you want me to do?" He asked, looking back at the book.

He sat there listening to her talk through everything to do with the potion. He stayed silent, trying to take in any and all details possible."Any questions?" she finally asked. He looked slightly overwhelmed and dropped his eyes to the book. "Errmm... " he started but trailed off

"Dont cut yourself off," she reminded him. "Look, if you do what we discussed, Snape should give you at least an acceptable, but if you keep practicing, it should go up to an E or maybe even an O by the end of term"

He nodded slightly, still not believing her on it. "So how does that work with the practical?"

"Because the practical is application of the theory" He sighed and ran his hand through his hair, getting a little stressed off her reply. "Same time, next week?" He gave a slight nod.

#dramione #harry potter fanfiction #harry potter fan fiction #harry potter #draco x hermione

[hihowareyawrites]

Swiss System

Cross Posted from my AO3

(no pairing), FMAB

Summary: Swiss System: A system of pairing tournaments whereby players are paired against opponents who are doing about as well as they are. Wherever possible, players get about an equal number of games with Black and White, and will not play the same opponent twice; Roy and Solf are assigned guard duty the evening following their dispute.

Pulling his rifle from it's rack in his tent, Roy Mustang sighed heavily in contempt for the night to come. He should have known better. Kimblee was only goading him, right? He shouldn't have lunged for him, no matter what he said. But Hawkeye looked so frightened at his words alone, he couldn't just sit there and let him prattle on. Still, Kimblee hadn't seemed at all bothered by Roy's grip on his collar, or how close to getting punched in the face he was. The same couldn't be said of the patrolling general, who punished them both by assigning them to overnight guard duty, together.

In Roy's opinion, the guard duty wasn't the punishment- spending time with Kimblee was.

The sun hung low in the sky over Ishval and the orange glow cast along the rubble around them made the hair on the major's neck stand; why had they been tasked with causing so much destruction? The question was rhetorical, and Kimblee's response to him earlier echoed in his mind: “because that's the job we were given to do, that's what we signed up for.”

Logically, he was right. Roy couldn't argue with anything he said, and that angered him even more. The fact that Solf J. Kimblee was correct, and he truly was naive not to see it.

As he approached the outskirts of their camp to stand guard, he noticed his guard partner was already there. Ever the punctual one, Kimblee stood with his rifle over his shoulder, idly observing the destroyed town beneath the cliff fall their post overlooked. At Roy's approach, he turned to acknowledge him, giving one of his friendly smiles. “Good evening, Major Mustang. Glad to be working with you tonight.” He'd extended a tattooed palm to Roy, who knew the destruction it could cause and shook it anyway, almost wishing the Crimson Lotus would blow his hand off and send him home.

“Yeah.” Was all he could offer in response, he couldn't lie and say he was glad to be working with Kimblee. He let go of the fellow alchemist's hand (how was it so cold in this temperature?) and walked over to the small bit of rubble piled up for them to sit on. With the amount of lives Kimblee took only just today, it was sure to be an uneventful evening, but long nonetheless. He figured he'd better set some ground rules, while he could. “Let's get one thing straight, neither of us want to be here. We're both more than capable enough to do more serious work. This is a punishment, not time to hang out. I have no intention of acquainting myself further with you, Kimblee.” Roy's lack of title when speaking to his equally ranked officer struck the other as impolite, but he would disregard it for now.

“Why, Major Mustang, surely I can't be that terrible of company.” Kimblee stalked over to him and sat beside him. He pulled one knee up to his chest, laced his hands over top, and rest his chin on them. “I apologize to have so deeply offended you earlier.” His words were earnest but his tone was nonchalant, and Roy could tell this would be a very long night.

“I'm not the one you should be apologizing to.” Truly Roy didn't fight for himself, but for Hawkeye's sake. She was the most upset by it, she was the most disturbed by Kimblee's words. And yet, Roy also found himself a bit... jealous? Not long after that argument, the sniper did approach him and say she couldn't deny what Kimblee said, and she felt so upset with herself that he was right. The fact that this man had made her acknowledge something and feel that guilt, was not something that sat well with the Flame alchemist.

Kimblee seemed aware who Roy was referring to, and looked away wistfully. “The woman, then.” He thought aloud.

“That's right. Whether or not what you said is true, this isn't the time to say it. Just because you're cold hearted enough to take lives so easily... doesn't mean it comes as naturally to the rest of us.”

“Cold hearted, eh...” Kimblee echoed Roy's words thoughtfully. For once Roy thought perhaps he offended him, and against his better judgment considered taking his words back, but he would be lying if he said he didn't feel Kimblee was every bit as cold hearted as he was perceived “Perhaps you're right, maybe I am cold hearted. But, it does make me a rather efficient weapon in our situation. It seems being cold hearted is exactly the trait our military finds valuable.”

God, he really did like to hear himself talk. The sun was beyond the horizon now and dusk had settled in. There was silence for a while, and Roy was thankful, until Kimblee spoke again. “Dusk is my favorite time of day. What's yours?” How arbitrary. He was just making polite conversation, and yet it made Roy angry. Everything he did made him mad.

But that sounded more like a personal problem, the more he rolled the idea over in his head. For just this evening, he would humor this man, and see if perhaps they had some common ground.

“Late afternoon. I like the sun to be high. There's something optimistic about it.”

“Hm, how interesting. What's your opinion on astrology?” That sure came out of nowhere. Kimblee was an alchemist as well, so he should be just as critical of made up sciences as any alchemist, but Roy would be lying if he said he didn't check his sign in the paper every day. Just out of curiosity of course.

“It's foolish, and favored by young girls. But I do know my sign, if that's what you're going to ask next. I'm a Leo.”

“I see! How thoughtful of you. I don't particularly subscribe to it, but it is interesting. August, I presume?”

“That's right.”

There was a long silence before Roy realized that he had given Kimblee information about himself without asking for anything in return. Equivalent exchange and all, he would learn this man's star sign.

“And yours?”

Kimblee laughed lowly at this, though it sounded somewhat genuine.

“I'd like to know what you think, how you perceive me.” It was painfully like him to do this. It was so very Kimblee to request information and give nothing in return. Roy unfortunately knew very little about astrology other than some basics so his guess was as good as anyone elses. He pondered a moment and gave a sidewards glance to Kimblee's hands still rested on his knee. Two arrays, huh...

“Gemini...” Roy guessed idly.

“Hm, that's wrong, but nice try. You're in the correct range. For your efforts I'll reward you and let you know that I'm a Cancer.” Roy had to stop himself from making a bad joke and accusing him of actually being cancerous, and finally settled on a simple 'I see'. “You know in Xing, they have their own zodiac, but it's based on the year rather than the month.” Was Roy really going to come out of this experience with only updated knowledge on global astrology? He guessed there were worse outcomes.

“No, I didn't know that... do you know them?” He was a bit curious. He'd heard women liked astrology, and if it was something he could potentially use on his plentiful dates, he wouldn't turn that down.

“I do, but I'll need to know the year you were born.” So there was the monkey's paw, Kimblee was going to know more about Roy than he really needed to, and Roy cursed himself for being so curious. A birth date though shouldn't be too incriminating.

“1885. August 16th. Do you need my blood type and shoe size too, or of have you gotten what you needed?” Kimblee turned to look at him and feigned surprise, then smiled.

“No, that should suffice. 1885 is the year of the rooster. How appropriate, in some ways they're likened to phoenix... bird of flames and all that. Coincidentally, you're one year older than myself.” Roy hadn't realized they were so close in age and almost felt happy to be the older, if only by a year. That's at least one year of superiority he had over this snarky man.

“What about you, are you going to make me guess again? Because I don't know any of them enough to-”

“Dog. My year is the dog.” Roy was taken back a bit that he was interrupted and upon recovering thought is words over.

“I see.” There was another long silence. The sun had completed disappeared and the sky was dark. Roy stood up and walked around to Kimblee's opposite and sat back down. This seat was small enough that their backs touched and it made Roy's skin crawl; as if he could catch whatever it was that made Kimblee so uncanny simply by resting against him this way. Again he felt a small pang of guilt. Kimblee was perfectly docile here, not going out of his way to harm anyone or anything, perhaps Roy misjudged him? Maybe he wasn't the man Roy thought he was? He contemplated for a while and investigated further. “So... do you like dogs?”

“I'm actually more of a cat person myself... I appreciate how self sustainable they are. They are independent, and intelligent.” Roy was almost personally offended but unsurprised by Kimblee's answer. If Roy looked hard enough, the Crimson Alchemist reminded him of a cat. Always perched somewhere staring harmlessly, seemingly docile and inattentive, maybe even affectionate occasionally. But seemingly without warning, the likelihood of getting scratched seemed fairly high. The idea of Kimblee as a small, harmless cat eased him. “I don't mind dogs however.” The addendum to his statement pulled Roy from his imagination. No, he was not a domestic cat. He was much more akin to a panther. The way he would skulk around, his sharp movements and reflexes, and his utter brutality.

“I could have predicted that.” Roy expected a snarky retort, but got none.

An hour or so passed and it was the dead of night, and Roy forgot how cold it was outside their tents in the desert evening. He considered making a small fire, but that would really make their position as guards rather compromised. Not that he needed it, he was rather accustomed to the cold and didn't mind it. The same couldn't be said of his companion however. A chill ran up the Crimson Lotus' spine and Roy felt it in his.

“I take it you're cold then.” He stated matter of factly.

“Ah, you could tell then? I'm not exactly accustomed to this weather... I must not eat enough iron.” Roy could hear the thrum of his fingers on the rock they sat atop. “When I'd heard we would be stationed in the desert, I was a bit happy about that. At least during the daytime, it's rather nice. My worst fear was being stationed in Briggs.” Roy smirked at the mental image of Kimblee in Briggs, far too cold for his liking, under the harsh command of their respective Iron Wall.

“Yeah... I don't think I could handle that either. Not just the weather, but the officials...”

“Yes, I've heard she's rather something to behold.” Kimblee considered for a moment before asking Roy, “What is your opinion of Major Armstrong?” Roy perked up at this.

“Olivier's brother?”

“Yes, our Strong Arm alchemist.”

“My opinion of him... he's quite powerful, if a bit eccentric. He has a lot of political pull given his family, so a good ally to have. Someone I would very much like to work beside.”

“But here?”

“I don't understand your meaning...” Kimblee shifted slightly and Roy felt him move and was thankful when he didn't turn to face him.

“It's true, he may be a powerful alchemist, and he may have political pull, and he may be the most reliable ally there is... but on this battlefield, perhaps none of that matters.” Roy's heart sank as their conversation drifted back to the war. And just when he thought they were acclimating to one another. “Remember how earlier, you had said I was “cold hearted”?”

“...yes, I do remember.”

“As I said, whether or not that's true...” It is. “... that just means that I'm more suited to this kind of work. If I'm cold hearted,” you are “then the reverse would be true of Armstrong. Despite his strength, his values, everything that makes him a great man... it does make him rather ineffective here, wouldn't you say?”

Roy considered his words for a moment. Logically, yes he was right. But did he want to give Kimblee the satisfaction of knowing that? Not really. Still he didn't want another night of this so he bit his tongue as best he could and said only “I suppose.”

“Objectively speaking though... I don't believe he is weak.” At that Roy's attention returned to Kimblee.

“Go on.”

“Personally, I don't believe being warm hearted or cold hearted is necessarily the determinant of one's strength. Rather, the conviction yielded by that heart. Whether or not you are kind or cruel, your dedication to your disposition is truly what grants a person strength.” If Roy didn't know better, he would think Kimblee was complimenting Armstrong. He couldn't find fault in what he was saying either. “For what its worth,” He began “my words to you earlier weren't meant to incite you. I simply believed if you could see things from my perspective, this work might not be so hard on you...”

Roy sighed. It's true he didn't feel a necessarily malicious intent from Kimblee earlier, and there was no secret his views and feelings were just a different standard than others, but was Roy really ready to allow himself to accept him? To accept this man who delighted in the destruction of others' lives to be his ally? His mind turned these ideas over and over for what felt like forever. “I see.” Was all he could offer Kimblee in response for now.

The night seemed to move at a decent pace after that. Neither of them said much, the occasional comment about current events back home. Little by little, they learned a bit about one another. Roy told Kimblee small details of his life only, and thus that is all he learned in return. He learned that the Crimson Lotus alchemist wasn't a fan of citrus, that his family worked in textiles, that before being sent to the war, he split up with a girlfriend and wasn't terribly broken up about it; he had no expectation for her or anyone else to build their life around him. Roy learned that Solf J. Kimblee was indeed human, like him and everyone else here. And that fact made him comforted and scared. If he truly was a human, just a normal human, how could he possibly feel so little for killing others? Could Roy become that way too? Would Roy become that way too? He just didn't know.

By the time morning came, both of them were a little worse for ware, and reluctant to go about the rest of the day without sleep. As they prepared to part ways, Kimblee was approached by a lower rank officer requesting his presence with General Gran, saying they had something for him to help aid them in their mission and get everyone home quicker. As he turned to leave Roy stopped him. “Wait-” Kimblee turned to Roy, his tired eyes asking what the Flame needed with him. “What is it that you tell yourself... to make being here easier every day?” To that Kimblee had no hesitation, a chesire-esque smile spreading across his face.

“It's just a job.” He said, and turned and left towards his request, leaving Roy standing there to ponder that sentence.

#fullmetal alchemist #fma #roy mustang #solf j. kimblee

[oumakokichi]

I hear around a lot that Momota is both an hypocrite and extremely loyal to his ideals, I was wondering if you could explain how these two traits can coexist without entering a contradiction

That’s a pretty good question, anon! Walking contradictionsare kind of a recurring theme with ndrv3, I feel. When you have a game whosecentral theme is “truth vs. lies,” there’s going to be a lot of focus on thegap between what people say and what they mean, what defines them as a person,and where their own personal failings lie. Many lies, after all, are ones thatcharacters either tell themselves subconsciously or unintentionally—therebyresulting in many characters who are well-intentioned but nonetheless still somewhathypocritical in their behaviors.

This response will be somewhat twofold, as I feel like partof Momota’s hypocrisy was designed as an intentional character flaw, and partof it was a result more of Kodaka’s mistakes as a writer by failing to address asmany of Momota’s flaws as he should have.

The first part is somewhat easier to put into words: namely,loyalty and hypocrisy are bothintentionally some of Momota’s more noticeable character traits. It’s easy tosee these traits when playing the game: it’s a fact that Momota is quick tostand up for others, even to the point of putting his blind faith in themimmediately.

Not only does he demonstrate this with Maki, most notablywhen he stands up for her in the Chapter 2 trial despite knowing nothing abouther, but also with Kaede in Chapter 1, and with Saihara several times, startingaround Chapter 2. Momota is quick to sort out who his friends and enemies are;when he’s made up his mind that he likes someone, he likes them, and even cold,hard facts can do little to sway his opinion (if Chapter 4 is any evidence ofthat). He bases his decisions on emotion, rather than reason or logic, and thismeans that he’s inclined to stick by how he feels about people, rather thanwhat the facts are saying.

It also means that he’s almost unflinchingly loyal when itcomes to the people he’s decided to call a friend. This isn’t such a surprisingtrait for him to have, given that Momota’s character is intentionally based onthe tropes and characteristics of a “heroic shounen protagonist.” There’s a lotof lampshading of this in the actual game—not only does he call himself “theprotagonist” repeatedly, but even his character design itself alludes to it.The color and design on his shirt is meant to resemble that of a kabuki actor,playing the part of a protagonist.

In just about every shounen series that’s ever been written,themes like unflinching trust and belief in one’s friends and loyalty to one’sown ideals and ambitions are very, very common. Gurren Lagann is perhaps thebest example of this, as Momota’s catchphrase is meant to be a throwback toKamina, who fulfilled a similar role of “inspirational hero” to Simon as Momotadoes to Saihara. Therefore, the fact that Momota is an extremely trusting,loyal, and steadfast individual who doesn’t easily sway from his ideals orbelief in others makes perfect sense—and that stubbornness itself is actually,simultaneously the cause of his hypocrisy, in my opinion.

His unwavering, immovable belief in others is itself adouble-edged sword. As I mentioned earlier, nothing proves this better thanChapter 4. While believing in others and having faith in people is certainly animportant ideal to strive for, ndrv3 makes it very clear that being on theopposite end of paranoia or blind faith can often lead to disasters. Characterslike Kirigiri and Nanami also emphasize in their respective games that trulygetting to know others actually involves doubting them first, in order to trulybe able to rule them out from suspicion. Avoiding that doubt entirely meansskipping a vital step in the process of getting to know someone.

But Momota refuses to recognize that doubt or suspicion arenecessary elements, especially in a killing game that they’ve all been forcedto play. He likes who he likes, and hates who he hates, and absolutely nothingshort of a miracle is ever able to make him change his mind. This is why, evenwhen shown concrete, hard proof that Ouma absolutely couldn’t have murdered Miu in Chapter 4, he still maintains thatOuma must have done it, somehow—because he hates Ouma, and he likes Gonta.Therefore, in his mind, the murder is already “solved” regardless of what theevidence says. Ouma is the “bad guy,” Gonta is the “good guy.”

This hypocrisy of his in deciding things based on rawemotion rather than logic or facts is somewhat brought up by the narrative.Despite the fact that he claimed to want to help Saihara embrace his talent asa detective, it’s also clear in Chapter 4 that the moment Saihara “sides” withsomeone who Momota doesn’t personally agree with (even though Saihara trulydidn’t side with either Ouma or Momota, but tried to find a middle ground), hissupport and encouragement become… well, far more limited.

Even after telling Saihara to believe in himself and his ownreasoning repeatedly ever since Chapter 2, when the end result is somethingtragic or unfortunate (like Gonta being the culprit), Momota doesn’t want tobelieve it at all. He instead switches to telling Saihara to “open his eyes,”questioning his theories and his reliability at almost every point in thetrial. He even goes as far as to threaten to punch him again, because he’s soentirely convinced that his own trust in Gonta is correct and that Saihara mustbe in the wrong this time.

This hypocritical stance is somewhat alluded to andforeshadowed throughout even the earlier parts of Chapter 4, where it becomesevident that Momota is far less comfortable with Saihara actually becomingrelied upon and trusted by the rest of the group. Saihara’s role as the SHSLDetective means that, by Chapter 4, the others are slowly coming to trust himand rely on him—even too much, perhaps, to the point where they aren’t reallythinking or looking for clues on their own, but instead feel that Saihara cansolve the case on his own.

Momota, who up until this point had played the role of theinspirational figure, quoting very Kamina-like lines of “believe in the me whobelieves in you,” looks obviously uncomfortable or goes somewhat silent at mostof these lines from the others in Chapter 4. His FTEs also show that he has atendency to rely on his “sidekicks,” rather than the other way around; he takescredit for most of the accomplishments of others, including politicians, idols,and baseball players. The easiest explanation for this behavior is that inaddition to genuinely wanting to help others improve and better themselves—well,he also wanted the actions of others to reflect well on himself.

Personally, I don’t fault him very much for having thisflaw. This sort of subconscious, unintentional hypocrisy and jealousy issomething that I feel is extremely human. Jealousy is a normal, human reaction,and very often it’s not something we feel intentionally. It’s not impossible tobe a genuinely good friend and want the best for someone while also having moresubconscious, negative emotions. Momota himself admits that this is basicallywhat happened shortly before his execution in Chapter 5. He acknowledges thathe was jealous of Saihara’s talent and the way in which the others were relyingon him, and that it was unfair of him to lash out at him in Chapter 4 the waythat he did.

This covers the range of loyalty and hypocrisy assimultaneous existing traits in Momota’s character. I do think that to someextent, this walking contradiction was something deliberately written andcrafted by Kodaka—after all, it’s very clear that most of Momota’s charisma isbaseless, and that while he’s a genuinely good, inspirational person, he’s alsoincredibly quick to judge, and often fails to think things through. He has nosolid plans in mind most of the time, fails to take facts and evidence intoaccount as they arise, and is very clearly meant to parallel Ouma’s unrelentingparanoia with his own blind faith in the people he likes.

However… I do think that a certain degree of Momota’shypocrisy stems more from Kodaka’s own hypocrisy as a writer, rather than beingincluded as a deliberate character flaw. There are many flaws which Momotaexhibits throughout the game which aren’t actually addressed as flaws at all bythe narrative.

Toxic masculinity is a prime example; many of Momota’s “solutions”to the problems Saihara, Gonta, and Hoshi experience involve the idea of “manningup.” Being emotional or “weak” is seen as “unmanly,” and therefore,undesirable. Crying, feeling depressed or suicidal, and talking about one’sproblems are all seen as signs of “weakness,” and things that a “man shouldn’tdo.” Meanwhile, much of his advice for Maki is the opposite; much of hiscriticism of her is that she’s “not girly enough,” or that she’s “doing thingsa girl shouldn’t do.”

Rather than describing her backstory and the trauma sheendured as something horrible that no human being should ever have to gothrough, much of Momota’s dialogue simply boils down to how “a girl shouldn’tkill people,” or “a girl shouldn’t use deadly weapons.” Even his initial trustin her and decision to “rip off her mask” is because, as he says in Chapter 3, “hejust can’t believe a weak-looking girl like her killed people for a living.”

This makes the entire dynamic between them somewhatfrustrating to watch in later chapters, as a relationship that could easilyhave been about a child soldier coming to view herself as a human being ratherthan a tool is instead shoehorned into a stereotypical narrative about a cold, “unfeeling”girl discovering her “maidenly” side through falling in love.

Unfortunately, this mindset is never once really, trulyaddressed as outdated or flawed by the narrative. Saihara is encouraged tobecome more like Momota, rather than Momota being encouraged to tone down someof his more hyper-masculine ways. When the results for the first ndrv3popularity poll were released in Japan, Kodaka even noted in an interview thathe was surprised Momota didn’t place higher—a pretty clear indication that hedidn’t see much wrong with Momota’s mindset or intend for those aspects of hischaracter to be treated as flaws.

Even more frustrating still, NISA’s localization oftenremoved even these flaws entirely from the game. Much of Momota’s toxicmasculinity was toned down considerably for the localization, resulting inconsiderably tamer dialogue from him. There are two examples I can think of offthe top of my head.

The first is a more well-known one which I’ve discussedbefore: in the original version of the game, in Chapter 2, Momota callsKorekiyo the word “okama,” a word that’s essentially a slur on par with thef-slur or the t-slur, and associated with heavily homophobic/transphobicsentiment. It’s often aimed towards flamboyantly gay men, or trans women, whoare unfortunately seen as “not real women” and are lumped into the samecategory as “gay men.”

It’s frustrating enough that this slur was used for comicrelief in the original version of the game, but the localization doesn’tinclude it at all. Instead, Momota calls Korekiyo “girly,” which doesn’tcapture the same negative sentiment at all. As a gay and trans person myself, I’mpersonally all for removing slurs—the problem is that I’m pretty sure the slurwas removed mostly to improve reception of Momota’s character in the west, rather thanbecause the slur was offensive in the first place. After all, plenty of slurswere added to the localization by other translators (Miu’s being perhaps themost notable, with more than 6 additions of the r-slur that weren’t in theoriginal, and that’s just what I’ve counted so far). And I think it’s worth noting that Momota’s reception in the western fandom has, in fact, been far more positive than it was in Japan.

The second example I can think of is in Momota’s FTEs, whichI translated some time before the localization released. In the final FTE,Momota refers to Saihara’s entire backstory (including his trauma from havingruined a man’s attempts at revenge and sent him to jail) as “kudaranai”—a wordwhich is very noticeably not polite or formal, and often translated as “stupid,”“worthless,” “idiotic,” etc. It’s a very blunt, straightforward assessment,hence why there’s an option in the dialogue for Saihara to get very, very madat Momota and tell him off—but in the localization, “kudaranai” was translatedas “trivial.”

There’s a world of difference between telling someone, “It’sreally stupid for you to be traumatized over something like that,” and “That’sa very trivial thing to be traumatized over.” In fact, the localization’sphrasing was so absurdly polite that it actually made Saihara’s angry responseseem like a drastic overreaction, rather than something justified. This is notthe only time Momota’s dialogue was shifted to seem far more polite or lessblunt, but simply one that I remember stuck the most with me, as I hadtranslated those FTEs myself and therefore remembered very well what kinds ofdialogue Momota used in the original Japanese.

These flaws, both with the original writing and thelocalization, result in Momota having a few very noticeable flaws to hischaracter which aren’t ever actually brought up by the other characters or questioned.Given that Momota’s role in the story is meant to be heroic, inspirational, anduplifting to Saihara and Maki (two out of three of the survivors), this meansthat many of his more serious flaws are somewhat brushed under the rug by theend in order to remember him better as the sort of grand, larger-than-life herohe wanted to go out as.

This is what therefore results in a sense of hypocrisy abouthis character and role within the story. While it’s true that hypocrisy is oneof his actual character traits, it’s also true that it wasn’t exactly handledas a flaw or called out in the same way that it would’ve been for a lesscentral, heroic figure to the plot. Even his jealousy of Saihara, which Imentioned was addressed near the tail end of Chapter 5, is especiallyhandwaved, and only brought up within the last few minutes of the post-trial.

None of this is to say that Momota isn’t a good character,of course! He’s extremely important to the plot of ndrv3, and I don’t thinkthere’s any denying that he’s a good person inclined to seek out the best inothers and inspire them. All of his positive traits are definitely there:loyalty, ambition, and unwavering faith in his friends. But it’s also true thathypocrisy is a very recurring theme with his character—both within thenarrative and outside of it, from the standpoint of Kodaka as a writer simplyfailing to call out or address certain character flaws.

This has gotten pretty long, so I’ll stop for now, but Ihope I could help answer your question, anon! Thank you for stopping by!

#ndrv3 #drv3 #new danganronpa v3 #kaito momota #momota kaito #ndrv3 spoilers // #my meta #okay to reblog #anonymous

[feliciahiwat]

How Long Does It Take For An Ex To Miss You With No Contact

How Long Does It Take For An Ex To Miss You With No Contact

RELATED: https://josephpayton.tumblr.com/post/652498860435963904/how-long-does-it-take-for-an-ex-to-miss-you-with-no-cont

It is inevitable that everyone misses their ex at some point following a split. They begin to miss the little, quotidian aspects of their ex-personality. partner's When you are alone and all alone, you may sense an emptiness within, and this may prompt some to wonder whether their breakup was the correct option.

During all of this, it is difficult to know whether to comply with the "no contact" guideline. The waiting period following a breakup is known as the No Contact Rule.

This guideline was made to provide people the space and time they need to recover from tragedy. People who are alone in their moments of need frequently benefit greatly from such periods because they have a better perspective on their relationship and so enhance the likelihood of getting back together with their ex.

How long does it take for your ex to miss you during no contact?

This is different from everyone else, since your own methods and approaches may or may not be effective for others. It is difficult to get agreement on when not keeping in touch is appropriate.

There are many people who make up this time period, and it may range anywhere from 3 weeks to 8 weeks. As according to study, the no-contact rule is most effective after around four weeks. Frequent contact with your ex may not be in your best interest. Give yourself a period of at least one month without seeing or speaking to your ex.

Several studies have shown that taking a break from a relationship can relax the participants and assist them to better understand their relationship as well as provide them with an opportunity to regroup and restructure their lives.

Will no contact make him move on?

Congratulations, you have jumped in. The No Contact Rule was implemented. However, you are concerned that your ex-boyfriend may stop loving you, or move on to someone else.

When you are faced with these worries, how should you handle them?

Would it be safe to say that your ex-boyfriend has a probability of moving on and forgetting about you? Maybe you will meet someone else, or you will simply be fed up with waiting for you.

There is always danger involved in trying out this ex-boyfriend method.

Even if your former boyfriend does manage to move on, your probability of him doing so while you are practicing your no contact approach is rather slim.

Is there a reason why?

If you think that she could be sliding out of your grasp, what would you do?

What are the stages of no contact?

Similar to the five phases of grieving, however here it is “feeling” without any interaction.

Thus, if your ex is abiding by the no contact rule, then you are keeping disciplined, you are applying the rule, and you are not making any errors in abiding by the rule. During the five phases you may anticipate your ex to go through, you can anticipate your former to experience these emotions.

1. placid and confident in their choice (3 Days To A Week)

2. Worry if they do not get in touch with you (Week To 2 Weeks)

3. The onset of feelings of anger once they realize they are being ignored (2 Weeks To 2.5 Weeks)

4. the fight over what they had lost (2.5 Weeks to 3 Weeks)

5. the faintest hope of contact (3 Weeks To 4 Weeks)

Will my ex forget about me during no contact?

There is no chance your ex will have forgotten about you if you do not contact him or her.

That is indeed how it works.

For instance, I would say your ex is to money as an example. In a situation when you have less money, you will be more concerned with how you are going to earn it.

Because you could afford many things, you will reflect back to those days and wonder how you ever did without money.

His ex being broke will force him to think about it more and more.

He has lost all that was significant to him in the past. That is why your ex is demanding what he lacks/can not have.

Going "no contact" will not cause your ex to forget about you. Do not give up till the end.

After you have been gone for a time, he will undoubtedly miss you and the contributions you made to the relationship.

If your ex remembers and remembers fondly, you have got an advantage.

Permanent connections with people we care about are crucial when it comes to getting back together with an ex.

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Does no contact help your ex move on?

The loss of the split is making you feel at the moment.

You are well aware of the fact that it is a really painful event.

I am highly encouraging you not to contact your ex, as they will have to feel motivated to want to.

Your ex must desire you back and you will need to feel something is lacking if that is the case.

Your ex must have felt the pain you are in now.

Because your ex has distanced themself from you, you sense a loss. You are unable to find them.

You seem quite excited about this.

Getting back with your ex requires a lot of motivation on their part. The only way a person can be motivated to get you back is if they fear losing you in the first place.

Even if your ex misses you, it may take time for him to want to see you again.

While you look at the phases an ex through when he or she is not contacting you, it may be seen as much more heartwrenching.

A lot of people have asked me whether they should analyze their ex during a time of no contact, and while my advise to you is to avoid it, I can tell you that when you stop trying to get back together and call, they may really understand that they do not want the relationship to end.

Avoiding touch can impede or even reverse your ex's transition to the next stage in his or her life.

The things that really work to help your ex get over you include chasing and contacting them. And, in fact, they will be fleeing from you.

It will be difficult to maintain a no contact status.

The more you work to get them back, the more you love them. Hm.

Will no contact work if he lost feelings?

If you were in a relationship with a toxic, emotionally unavailable, or narcissistic person and even after the relationship has ended, are missing your partner, it may be a sign that he misses you. He might be in your DNA.

Above all, around Christmas and surrounding holidays.

It is thus: Yes. The manner in which your ex missed you mirrors the way he was while he was in a relationship with you, to be ambiguous.

Please, tell me more.

does he miss me?”, you must understand the starting point. do you think he misses me while we are not in contact? in order to do that, we must unravel the questions first.

This information is not new, but the main reason for having no contact is to ensure that you will not be further provoked in a negative relationship, which will allow you to recover and move on.

How do you know if your ex misses you during no contact?

Though your ex talks about you continuously even when you are separated, whether he lauds you or criticizes you, it just proves that he is unable to let go of you. He can't resist gossiping about you, no matter how much effort he expends to cover his tracks. The wisest course of action in this situation is to mind your own business. Stick to your guns when you are away from the other person since the only thing it will do is stir up emotions, muddying your focus. Do not be afraid to address him if you see anything going on that disturbs you. Approaching him should be your absolute last choice, however before you do that, make sure you have looked everywhere and considering all possibilities, confronting him is the absolute last thing you want to do.

How do I know if my ex misses me?

When your ex checks their profile, one of the indicators they are still missing you is that their photograph is still a photo of the two of you together. Additionally, your ex will keep coming back to see what you are up to on social media if they miss you. In the case of an ex who misses you and cares about you, social media will be littered with indications.

Does silence make a man miss you?

Yes, no contact causes him to miss you, but only if you spend time using this method in a prudent manner. As I said before, spending time waiting around for a call from him or having a lot of parties would not lead him to think, "I miss her... I wish I had the chance to speak to her...

To have an impact, however, you have to spend this time effectively and actively concentrate on improving your life. The duration of your no contact time will depend on that one factor alone.

RELATED: https://josephpayton.tumblr.com/post/652498860435963904/how-long-does-it-take-for-an-ex-to-miss-you-with-no-cont

How long does it take for an ex to reach out?

Would you want to know how long you have to go on being lonely? Is it ever going to end? You have to wait a certain amount of time for a text message, a sign, or anything else.

Once you've signed up for hundreds of dating sites that will tell you how to “adopt the No Contact rule”, your ex will inevitably return to you. In all likelihood, they will have your ex at their feet within the next two weeks or three months, begging to be let back. This is the gift you get. However, it is generally untrue.

I will only lie to your face if you want me to do so. Try doing a Google search for it, and you will discover that the answers you are looking for are completely accurate. Stop reading if you like that. The most accurate way to uncover the truth is to sit back and relax.

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