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matbarzyy · 4 years

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4 times you made Mat’s apartment feel like home and 1 time you didn’t

A/N: This is my first ever attempt at a 4+1, I figured it’d be fun to try. This is angst so that I don’t always post fluff/smut, I like to mix it up lol. It was supposed to be a relatively short one and I somehow ended up at 5k so enjoy I guess.

Word count: 5210

Warnings: Heartbreak I guess

One month.

It was the longest you had gone without seeing Mat since you had moved in together. You were both buzzing for him to come back so you could be sharing the same space again, you could never get enough of each other.

“Hello beautiful,” Mat’s grin was the biggest you had ever seen on his face, it was the kind of smile he could never fight off even if he wanted to.

“Hi handsome,” You returned the greeting with the words you used every time he called you. It started off as a joke but quickly became a habit that made both of your hearts flutter.

Mat didn’t hesitate to step forward and engulf you in a tight hug, his bags forgotten by the door.

“I missed you,” He breathed out, squeezing you against him and bathing in the feeling of holding you again. You smelled like home. It was everything he had been dreaming of alone in his bed, your warmth, the way you fit perfectly against his body.

“You’re never going anywhere without me again,” You mumbled against his chest, knowing you wouldn’t be pulling away for another minute or two at least.

You said it every time, you hated being away from him, but after you settled down together for a few days you went back to your usual mood. Mat needed to move, he loved hockey and visiting his family or travelling for games. You loved coming with him for those things, but sometimes he had to go alone and you were both okay with it.

Things never changed. You loved each other more than words could describe, some time apart would never break that. Every time Mat came home he still felt the exact same way about you, and you felt the exact same way about him. It was comfortable and safe to be together, you made each other happy.

“Do you mind if I go shower quickly? And then we can get cuddled up in bed?” Mat kissed the top of your head, rubbing your back gently as he pulled back to look at you.

“Can I come in the shower with you?” Your arms remained around his torso, refusing to let him go, and a soft smile grew on his face.

“Of course baby,”

There was nothing sexual about it, although you could never lie about what seeing Mat naked did to you. It was intimate and comforting, something you desperately needed after missing out on hugs and kisses for so long.

“You have no ideas how many times I dreamed of this with you,” Mat guided you under the stream of water so that you could rinse off the soap he had been rubbing over your body.

Steam was building up in the room, making the mirror foggy and warming up the air. You liked it that way, it meant less fighting between you and Mat to be under the hot water.

“It’s been the same here for me,” You kissed his jaw and guided him to turn around so that you could rub his back. “I think about you constantly,”

“You wanna go on a date tomorrow night?” He spoke softly as the tension fell from his muscles. You were magic.

“Of course,” You kissed his shoulder blade. “We always go on a date the day after you get back,”

“I know,” He hummed, turning back to face you. “I always look forward to it, it makes things feel normal again,”

“Mat?” You whispered because of how close he suddenly was, his hands at your waist and his forehead resting against yours.

“Mmh?”

“I love you so much it still overwhelms me every time I see you.” You told him without shying away. Mat was your safety, the person you confided everything in, and you opened your heart to him without hesitation.

His lips found yours without a reply, but the way he kissed you told you enough. You wrapped your arms around his neck to get closer and felt his own tighten around your body, pulling you in until the rest of the world disappeared. Mat murmured something against your lips when he gently pushed your back against the wall, but his lips were still so close to yours that you couldn’t decipher the words.

What he said didn’t really matter, Mat was home.

“It’d be cute if we had a puppy,” Mat finished folding your favorite blanket on the couch to tidy the living room. It was all he had found to keep himself busy, but since the place was already clean there wasn’t much for him to do.

“Mmh, yeah, maybe,” You smiled at him as you looked up from your laptop, barely hearing his words but replying anyway because you didn’t want to ignore him.

You still had a lot of work to do but Mat was being the most distracting person ever. He thought it was fair, it was his first weekend home in a long time and he hadn’t spent time with you apart from sleeping in at least three weeks, if not a month. He had then spent two days away and just got back. He knew it wasn’t like he left for a roadie or some other long trip, but he had still expected you’d catch up on quality time together.

“What kind of dog would you want?” He interrupted your focus once more, hoping it would start an actual conversation that would stop him from being so bored. He knew there were other things for him to do, but nothing he wanted to do without you.

“I don’t know Mat,” You half sighed, frowning as you struggled to put the end of your sentence together.

“I think a golden retriever would be cute,”

“I’m still working, you mind giving me just another hour of quiet?” You eventually tore your eyes from the screen to give him your full attention. It was what he wanted, but not exactly like this.

“Yeah sure,” Mat tried not to take it to heart, you didn’t sound snappy, but he still felt like you didn’t want him around.

He missed you and everything you used to do together, he couldn’t help being needy, and your rejection, although justified, hurt him.

You bit your lip as you got through the last of your emails, doing everything you had to get done by the end of the night while Mat stayed in your shared bedroom on his own. You almost called him over to tell him he could watch something with you while you worked, but it would be too distracting for you and you didn’t know if he was mad at you.

“Hey champ,” You quietly opened the door to the bedroom, tiptoeing to your side of the bed because it was the closest. “Can I join?” You knew he’d be watching hockey for a while still, and while you weren’t particularly in the mood to focus on a game you just wanted to be with him.

“Course,” He glanced at you but focused back on the screen quickly. He was clearly in work mode too, watching players carefully to see what he could pick up from them to up his game.

You hesitated for a second, wondering if you were bothering him, but you climbed into the bed anyway. Mat opened an arm wordlessly, inviting you to cuddle, and you didn’t need more to come rest against his side. Your eyes fell shut faster than you thought they would, you were too tired to focus on the game and the warmth of Mat’s body was all you needed to start feeling sleepy.

His body slid down with yours, putting you both under the covers while you blinked your eyes open. You didn’t realise it had been that long, and you stirred a little as you tried to look at him.

“What…”

“Shh,” He kissed your forehead, pulling away to grab the remote and turn the TV off. “Go to sleep,” He didn’t let you move much, wanting to keep you in the position you were about to fall asleep into.

“You were watching the game,” You mumbled, not complaining that you had to keep your head on his chest. It was warm and comfortable, you liked feeling his heartbeat under your palm where you rested your head.

“I don’t care about the game, just wanna cuddle you,” He usually watched players carefully, but he had only put this one on to wait for you. There was nothing he wanted more than to be in bed with you, every problem of the day long forgotten as you held onto each other.

Right there, watching you fall asleep on his chest, Mat felt at home.

“What are you all dressed up for?” You looked up from your work to see Mat just finishing to button his shirt.

“I just got back, it’s date night,” His heart deflated when he realised you had forgotten, but he felt a little bit better when you closed your laptop without hesitation.

“Shit, I’m sorry. What time do we need to be there?” You glanced at your watch and bit your lip nervously.

“In half an hour, it’s fifteen minutes away,” He had picked a restaurant you mentioned wanting to try, but now that he thought about it he figured he should have made reservations somewhere he was curious about.

“I’ll hurry, we might be five minutes late?” You hoped he wouldn’t be too mad at you.

Somehow, you would have preferred a little bit of anger you could talk out than the disinterested shrug he gave you as he replied.

“Sure, it’s whatever,”

You were still thankful he never, ever raised his voice. You couldn’t take that, he had known from the start that it would only make things worse. You had enough bad experiences with men yelling in your life and you didn’t want to have to deal with more, so he had promised to always talk things out with you. He promised that no matter the temper he sometimes had on the ice, that would never be him off it.

It was part of the reason you trusted him so much. He was a wall of muscles compared to you, but you were never scared of him because he had always acted as soft as a golden retriever puppy around you.

Mat busied himself on his phone while you rushed to put on a nice blouse with trousers you recently bought. You tied the look with a pair of heels and put on a little bit of makeup before grabbing your purse and phone to meet him at the door.

“Okay I’m ready,” You followed him quickly, heading to his car while you ran your hand through your hair in hope of making it look alright.

“You’ve been working insane hours lately,”

“So have you,” You didn’t want to be mean, but Mat was always training. Working overtime wasn’t that common for you, once you were out of the office you were the most normal person, whereas Mat’s job followed him everywhere and was much harder to plan around.

“I guess yeah,” He nodded, eyes focused on the road.

Things were different lately. You were distant, barely doing anything with him, and he knew part of it was his fault too. It was one of those hard times when everything felt out of place, but they had never lasted so long in your relationship before.

“The position for general manager is open, I’m really hoping I have a shot at it,” You explained to hopefully settle the mood in the car. There was a reason you were pushing yourself until late at night, and Mat felt bad for reacting that way.

“Oh wow, shit that’s good,” He cleared his throat. “Why didn’t you tell me before?”

“You were busy,” You shrugged it off, trying not to make him feel like it was another dig at him.

“It doesn’t mean I don’t care,” His palm faced up when he rested his hand on his knee, hoping you’d take it.

“I know,” You placed your hand in his and squeezed reassuringly.

Dinner was still a little uncomfortable, but it wasn’t as bad as the moment you spent in the car.

It was hard to place why, but the conversation felt forced. You had never found it so hard to talk to Mathew before, things had always flowed between you, but for the past few months you had grown on your own sides without sharing as much as you used to. The hockey season was just starting and you were following it, but you didn’t know as much as you should about what was going on with the team.

Mat told you about the guys and you struggled to catch up, not knowing much of what had been going on with any of his friends lately. You used to be tight with his team, they were like family, but you couldn’t even remember the last time you had even seen Tito.

Things were different, somehow, you had drifted apart and you were both clinging to something that would bring you back together. The drive back from the restaurant was quiet, music from the radio filling the gap that neither of you could acknowledge out loud.

You didn’t know where you fit in the bed that night, holding your pillow rather than Mat because he was taking too long in the shower. He never did that before, on any other date night you would immediately go to bed together, cuddling or more. Mat rarely took more showers than he needed unless he had something heavy on his mind, and he certainly never took that long in them.

You were half asleep when Mat slid into the bed behind you, burning hot from the water as he wrapped himself around your body to spoon you. You naturally relaxed against him, the tension you didn’t realise you were holding in your shoulders disappearing when he left a kiss on the back of your head.

“You know I love you, yeah?” Mat snuggled closer and made sure you were both comfortable under the covers.

“I love you too, so much,” You grasped his hand in yours, bringing it up to your lips to kiss his knuckles.

As silence filled the room your hearts still beat together, soft thumps lulling you into a peaceful sleep. There were things to talk about, but nothing that couldn’t be fixed. Mat knew that no matter what, you’d forever be his home.

“It’s just a week,” Mat told you as he put his bags by the door, Tito was already on his way to pick him up, it was only a matter of minutes now.

“Yeah,” You tried to smile weakly, but he didn’t make the same effort.

“Can we talk about whatever the hell is going on with us?” He forced himself to bring it up now. He didn’t want to come back and pretend everything was fine when it wasn’t, some issues needed to be addressed before he left.

He knew that when he came back you’d both fall back into each other, blaming this week of distance for everything that was wrong, but there was more to it.

“I feel like we’re falling apart, Mat,” You voiced the fears that had been in your mind for weeks. “I just… I don’t know. I should be excited you’re going to play, or sad you won’t be home, but things have been so empty lately,”

“It feels like it won’t even change anything,” He nodded, glancing down at his feet. You were both weirdly calm about starting this conversation, days of apathy towards each other leading you to feeling numb.

“But that used to be a good thing, it didn’t matter that you were home or away, we were always fine when we talked,” You didn’t understand how or when things shifted. Mat had always been your safety, your person. You could talk easily and feel close no matter how much time you spent apart, so how was it that you were never close even when he was home lately?

“We don’t talk though,” He pointed out, making you frown although you knew what he meant.

“We do,”

“You know it’s not the same,” He shook his head a little, biting his lip to bite back tears as he thought of a way to tell you what he needed without hurting you.

He couldn’t find one.

“But-“ You didn’t want to acknowledge how wrong things were. It was still okay, there were no big fights, things could all be fixed.

“Please don’t,” His voice was soft, apologetic for the words that were about to come out. “This isn’t working the way it used to,”

“It still works, I love you,” You couldn’t look away from his eyes, and Mat tried his best not to stare at the floor or somewhere else in the room. He could see the pieces of your heart falling apart one by one, and it was all his fault.

“I love you too, that will never change but… we can’t keep on going on like this,”

“Maty please,” Your voice cracked and your heart rate picked up from the panic that took over your body. His words had never scared you more than they did right this second.

“I’m sorry, you know I don’t want this anymore than you do,” His chest tightened, it killed him to see you like this. There was nothing he wanted more than to hug you, but it wouldn’t fix anything.

“Then don’t do it,” You couldn’t stop the tears from flowing down your cheeks, barely bothering to wipe them away.

“I’ll be gone for a week, and I think it might be good for us to get a break,” He tried to soften the blow as well as he could. “Maybe we can just think about this for a bit rather than try to talk or whatever, and we can… we can have a conversation when I get back,”

“So what? We’re just going to ignore each other for a week until you come home and tell me you want to break up with me?” You took a step back when he tried to reach for your hand. The look of hurt that finally became obvious on his face was nothing compared to how much of a mess you already were.

“I don’t want to break up with you,”

“It doesn’t sound like you’re very sure about that,” Your chest shook with a single sob, forcing you to bite down on the inside of your cheeks.

His silence told you everything you needed to know.

It was suffocating.

Your eyes searched his for a sign that he still wanted you, but they lacked the spark they used to have whenever he looked at you.

“I don’t want to fight with you,” He eventually spoke up, his voice soft, like he was afraid anything he said could break you.

“I don’t want that either,” You were too shocked to say anything, the weight of his silence still hanging in the air.

“So let’s talk when I get back, okay?” He concluded before you could process anything else, completely numb and frozen on the spot.

“Okay,” You vaguely felt his lips brush over your forehead, and a second later the front door was falling shut behind him.

Calling in sick to work was your only option.

You could barely drag yourself out of your bed, let alone take a shower, get dressed and head to the office.

You didn’t receive a single text from Mat, not even when his flight landed. He always told you he had arrived safely. Always. Checking your phone for what felt the millionth time since you woke up made you sigh. The screen was still blank apart from a couple of notifications from your friends trying to make sure you were okay.

You weren’t, but they knew that already. They’d understand if you took ages to reply, so you kept on ignoring them as you buried your face in Mat’s pillow and shed some more tears.

How could he do this? How could he leave for a whole week and never want to talk to you? You were struggling not to call him with every second that passed, it consumed every bit of energy in your body, so how was he having fun with his friends and playing games at his best while you couldn’t even bring yourself to eat?

The only answer that came to you was something you never thought you would ever consider.

Mat didn’t love you anymore.

He fidgeted with his phone on the way back from the airport, wondering if you remembered what time he was supposed to land. He hoped you did, because he still didn’t text you. He had gotten plenty of time to himself, too much of it even, and if it wasn’t for the team keeping him busy he would have never made it through so many days of not talking to you.

He had made up his mind. It was easy once he was out of the apartment, all he had to do was imagine himself coming home. The only thing he wanted when he pictured that was you, and it told him everything he needed to know. No matter what was wrong lately, there was a way to make it better. You were the love of his life and he’d never give up.

Now all he had to do was come back to you and fix it.

“I’m back,” He called out after closing the door behind himself, leaving his bags down and listening carefully to see if you were home. You were always there to greet him, surely you had to be there.

You came into view a second later, dressed in leggings and an old concert t-shirt that was so worn out the band logo on it was almost gone. Your hair was messily pulled back, but the thing that hurt Mat the most was the look on your face.

He had seen you in plenty of messy, lazy outfits, but you were still always smiling. This was different. The bags under your eyes told him you hadn’t been sleeping, and you were so pale he worried you’d pass out right there in front of him.

His heart almost stopped knowing he caused this. He was the reason for your pain, and he needed to fix it.

“Can I hug you?” Mat stepped forward hesitantly, but you moved back and shook your head, tears already brimming in your eyes.

“I love you so much Mathew,” You wrapped your arms around yourself, not knowing where to start but with the way you felt.

“Hey, don’t-” He felt himself crumble at your broken tone. How could he have done this to you? How could he have left you thinking he’d ever want to break up with you?

“No, stop,” You sniffled, trying your hardest not to break into sobs. You had prepared yourself to say this in your head, but you couldn’t realise how much harder it would be once you were facing him. “I just- I don’t get where you stopped loving me,”

“I didn’t,” He replied instantly, his eyes widening and his heart sinking in his chest.

“That’s not true,”

“Why are you saying that?”

“Because this week has been the worst week of my life,” You clenched your fist so tightly your nails dug into your palm. The pain was grounding, it was always better than acknowledging the ache in your chest. “And you just went about it like it was fine,”

“I just needed some time to think,” The guilt was so overwhelming he felt sick in his stomach. You had never doubted his feelings for you before, he was always good at reassuring you, but he had ruined years of trust before leaving.

“I don’t need time to know how much I love you,”

“Love isn’t all you need to keep a relationship going,”

“Well, it sure as hell can’t keep going when you don’t have at least that,” You bit your tongue as you hinted to where this conversation was going.

It was the only way to make it right. If Mathew didn’t love you anymore you had to let him go.

“You don’t want this anymore,” His shoulders dropped and he had to catch himself against the door, ready to collapse. Tears filled his eyes, blurring his vision.

“This is all I want. You’re all I want, but I can’t have that if you don’t want it as much as I do,”

“I don’t want to be without you,” He wiped his cheeks repeatedly, annoyed at the flood but unable to stop it. His voice trembled as he continued, short quick breaths making his chest shake. “I’m sorry I left like this, but we can work on this- I- I just got home… Just let me make this right,” He couldn’t bear the thought of being alone here, without you. You gave the place life, you gave him life. He had no home if he wasn’t with you, he couldn’t let you go like this.

“Mat… I’d go to the end of the world for you, I don’t even think you realise… I- it’s been so hard for me, I’ve had to keep up and deal with so much,” You couldn’t even begin to count the reasons you shouldn’t have gotten together in the first place, and Mat knew it too. There was a lot to sort out on both sides, but you had decided to ignore it all together to make it work no matter what. “It was all worth it to be with you, and I’d do it a million times again, but I’m not strong enough to do this if you can’t love me the way I love you,”

“I do love you,” He needed to repeat it a million times again, but you wouldn’t listen. Mat lip trembled as he thought he couldn’t even hold you to make it better.

“Not in the same way,”

“Don’t do this please,” He begged, knowing where he messed up but refusing to let it happen so easily. “How- how can you think I don’t love you?” He choked on his words. “After everything, I- I just-”

“You said it yourself, this isn’t working the way it used to,” The way you reused his words made him feel like you were stabbing him straight in the heart. This was all his fault, so why was there nothing he could say to make you believe he loved you?

“So we’re not even to try and talk about how we can fix it? I didn’t need to think about my feelings for you when I was away, I’ve always loved you, I love you, I-”

“There’s no way to fix this, look at us!” You interrupted and motioned between the two of you, the space that was there was unnatural. It was the first time he made it through the door and didn’t immediately cross the distance to hug you.

“I can’t lose you,”

“I’m sorry Mathew, I’ll… I’ll come get my stuff over the weekend,” You had already made plans to sleep somewhere else, but you didn’t have the heart to pack before he made it home.

“No,” He stayed in front of the door, shaking his head vehemently and clenching his jaw while you took a step closer to the exit. “You can’t do that!” His voice boomed through the apartment. You shrunk on yourself before he even realised what he had done. “Baby no,” His eyes widened in panic. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to raise my voice, I’m sorry,” He repeated, watching the tears flood your cheeks.

He left without reassuring you he still loved you, he let you think he wanted to break up with you, and just as he tried to fix it, he managed to break the most important promise he ever made to you.

“Let me go,” You sniffled, waiting for him to move.

Mat could do nothing but step aside.

+1.

Empty.

It was a fitting word for both the apartment and Mat.

He should have been happy to be home, but this place wasn’t it. He thought it would be for some time, but nowhere would ever feel like home unless you were there.

Dealing with you leaving had turned him into a wreck, so for some time Tito told him he should come live with him. It helped a little, he wasn’t as lonely and it stopped him from getting in his head.

He knew he’d have to come back eventually, Tito had his own life and Mat couldn’t constantly be in the middle of it.

Everything he was normally happy to find was missing. The plant on his coffee table was dead from the lack of water, and he thought it was a pretty good representation of how things were going for him lately.

He didn’t get to come home to you, he didn’t get a hug, he didn’t feel his heart flutter at the softness of your voice when you said you missed him, he didn’t feel your warmth or take in the sweet scent of your perfume.

Dropping his bags in the bedroom was torture.

The closet was open, showing off the empty half he couldn’t bring himself to start using. He remembered how he used to joke about being annoyed his shirts always ended up in your pile because you wore them so much.

The apartment was dead silent, it left plenty of room for Mat’s thoughts to take over his mind.

He missed you like hell. Every time he thought he was over it he turned around and got reminded of you by the smallest thing. Finding a hair tie under his bed felt like a slap in the face, a painful reminder of what used to be. Mat knew it probably ended up there after he took it out of your hair one night because he liked running his fingers through it as you both fell asleep, and his thoughts then moved on to the bed itself.

He could barely look at it, let alone sleep in it. The bedsheets no longer smelled like you although he still used the fabric softener you liked, your pillow remained untouched now that he was done crying into it, and Mat had to clench his jaw to keep tears at bay as he moved to the living room.

The soft red blanket you had bought to bring colour to the place was still on the couch. He slept with it when you left, and his pillow was still resting against the armrest. He almost considered moving for a moment, there were plenty of places to live in New York, he didn’t need to keep this apartment if he couldn’t even deal with standing in the bedroom anymore.

He knew it might help, but it wouldn’t fix anything. He’d have less reminders but just as many thoughts.

He’d never find a home without you.

I’m not 100% happy with how this one turned out but I don’t have a lot more energy to give it so I’m posting it anyway. Hope it was still okay to read for you guys, comments and feedback are always much appreciated.

Please reblog!

#mat barzal #writing #fluff #angst #mathew barzal fic #mathew barzal imagine #mathew barzal fluff #mathew barzal angst #mat barzal fluff #mat barzal angst #nhl imagine #nhl fic #isles13 #islanders

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mrslilyrogers · 4 years

Text

Betrayal Part 1

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Summary: (AU) Set in New York. You and Bucky have been married for 5 years. He’s the love of your life and you are his. At least, you thought you were until he started slipping away from you, coming home late and smelling of another woman’s perfume? You are in denial. Are you just losing your mind or are you really losing him?

A/N: Hi! I’m new here and still figuring out tumblr. I have no idea how all this goes! This is the first ever story I’m posting online. I just couldn’t get the idea out of my head and would like to share it with all of you! Quarantine’s finally given me time to get over posting online, lol. Please comment away whatever you think of the story! This is a very angsty fic! hope you enjoy :)

Warnings: ANGST, CHEATING

She turned in bed flinging her arm out expecting Bucky to be beside her as her groggy mind pulled her back into sleep, only to have her hand bounce back on the empty mattress. Her arm fished farther out, trying to find him in the dark but still, it was empty. Confused, she slowly opened her eyes to blink the sleep away, he wasn’t home. She shot up as the realization hit her and glanced at the clock, its red glaring lights mocking her. 4:25 AM.

Bucky didn’t come home.

She swallowed as a lump formed in her throat. The first few nights he kept coming home late, she waited for him, asked how his day was, what took him so long at work and he’d usually dismiss her with a kiss and her favorite crooked smile as he cuddled up to her in bed making her forget all her worries. Even up until now, after five years of being married, he still had that effect on her. One glance her way with his smirk and she’d still feel her heart flip inside her chest. Whenever he hoisted Lizzie up in the air making her giggle, Y/N was sure her heart was shining in her eyes as she watched them.

And now this.

She knew the first time he told her not to wait up, something was off. He kept coming home later than usual and when he did come home, he smelled of alcohol and as much as Y/N would like to deny it, perfume. A perfume that distinctly wasn’t hers. Instead of confronting him about it, she denied it to herself, closing herself off to the truth that was becoming more and more obvious as the days went on. Instead, she took extra efforts to please him, waking up early to cook his favorite breakfast, preparing his favorite dishes for dinner even though he barely came home for it, trying to pass by his office at lunch so they could spend time together. All the while hoping he would stay and come back to her, come back to being her Bucky.

She wiped the tears that started to drip down her eyes. “Where did it all go wrong? What have I done to deserve this?” A sob came out as soon as she allowed herself to accept the truth. She brought her knees up to her chest and buried her face in between, hugging herself, trying to make herself as small as possible as sobs wracked her body. She cried for Bucky, cried for their family, cried for herself because somewhere in the process, she lost her pride and accepted whatever affection he could afford to give her, like a dog trying to please its owner, and never demanding what she deserved. She might have stayed like that for an hour or more but she knew that if she continued on, Lizzie would wake up and find her mother crying her eyes out and that’s the last thing she wanted. Lizzie, oh god, Lizzie what was she going to do with her sweet daughter? She could accept Bucky cheating on her, neglecting her even but for their daughter, it was unacceptable, she was only four, she did not deserve this. Yet, she was the collateral damage to the shambles of their marriage. The thought made her head hurt, she scrambled out of bed, needing to do something or she’d wallow in self pity and she needed to be strong for her daughter, always for her daughter, even if it meant living in a delusion to keep her family together. She heard footsteps at the stairs of their apartment and quickly grabbed her phone by the bedside table and ran to the bathroom. She leaned against the door, sighing, listening to him shuffling in the bedroom.

“Y/N, you in there? Sorry, fell asleep on Steve’s couch.” Bucky called from the door, no trace of guilt in his voice. Y/N just closed her eyes and sighed.

“About to take a bath!” She replied and checked her phone. No messages from him whatsoever that he’d be at Steve’s apartment. She quickly tried to hide her hurt to take on the day. For her sanity, for Lizzie, the mantra kept repeating itself in her head.

_______________________________________________________________________

“Mommy, why can’t I have cereal?” Lizzie whined from her seat at the counter as Y/N poured her orange juice.

“Yeah, why can’t she have cereal?” Bucky strode in playfully, the scent of his after shave filling Y/N’s senses, making tears prick at her eyes. She quickly turned around and faced the coffee pot, pouring more into her mug. She couldn’t stand to be near him after accepting the truth. She couldn’t face their situation, not yet.

“Daddy!” Lizzie chirped, already lifting her arms for a hug from her self-proclaimed superhero dad.

“How’s my little girl this morning?” He said lifting her up and kissing her cheek which only made her giggle.

“Eat your vegetables, squirt.” Bucky reminded her a little more seriously but with a charming smile nonetheless, and Lizzie, who worships the ground he walks on, eagerly nibbled on the beans from her plate trying to please him. Just like her mother, Y/N thought sarcastically.

She was still turned away from the counter when she felt Bucky sidling up behind her, his arms snaking around her waist, pulling her in to kiss her hair.

“Morning, babe,”

“Morning Buck,” She cleared her throat and moved away from him, standing in front of her daughter who was eating her breakfast far more enthusiastically than when her dad wasn’t around. God, this was a mess, what was she going to do? Lizzie clearly adored her father and if she were being honest with herself, she didn’t know how to live without Bucky.

Bucky saw the glassy look in Y/N’s eyes as she stared at their daughter, her hands fiddling in front of her and he instantly knew it was on him. He brought that look on her face, guilt and remorse punched him in the gut.

“Hey,” he said soothingly putting his hand on her back as he was about to apologize about last night.

“Lizzie, drink your juice, daddy will bring you to school,” Y/N flinched away from him, starting to flee the room.

“I gotta go,” She told him, grabbing her bag from the counter, and kissing their daughter on the cheek before heading out. She didn’t glance at him or give him his kiss goodbye like she usually did and instead, avoided looking at him. He froze, feeling the fear creep up on him. She didn’t know, did she?

“Bye Mommy!” Lizzie waved from her chair as Y/N got to the door. She turned around with a genuine smile on her face. God, she was beautiful when she smiled like that, and he missed it, he missed her and he hadn’t even realized it.

“Bye baby,” she said as she blew her a kiss. She cleared her throat and her expression blanked when she turned to him.

“Buck, don’t forget to pick her up today,”

“Today?” She usually picked Lizzie up from school, being the owner of a quaint little cafe, Winter Bakery, giving her the flexibility in schedule to do so. He had work to do and he was gonna meet up with Celeste around that time. The immediate thought of the woman he was seeing brought shame and guilt to his conscience, making him lash out at her.

“I can’t, you know I have work,” he said a little too accusingly.

Y/N just closed her eyes and exhaled harshly, trying to reign in her control.

“Daddy, don’t you want to pick me up?” Lizzie asked sadly and Bucky felt all his anger vanish as he saw his little girl’s fallen face.

“Of course not, sweetie, I just--”

“Bucky, we’ve been through this, I’m trying to land this catering gig for Stark, remember?” Y/N’s defeated voice rose above his and he immediately felt sorry, god, he was the worst husband.

Sure, it was just a little get together for the birthday of Tony Stark’s daughter but it was a big deal to Y/N. She had met Pepper in Lizzie’s school as they waited for their pre-schoolers to be dismissed and instantly became friends. At first, Y/N was starstruck with Pepper especially when she discovered that she was a hands-on mom, while running Stark Industries at the same time but she was such a down-to-earth woman matched with a witty sense of humor that it was hard to lose any topic of conversation with her. Of course, it helped that Lizzie and Morgan had become the best of friends even on just the first day of school. Next thing they knew, they were spending play dates at the bakery when the girls insisted on hanging out. That’s when Pepper discovered Y/N’s cupcakes and raved to Tony that, “they were absolutely the best she’s ever had”. Of course with Tony being Tony, wanting only the best for his daughter, set up a taste test meeting for his daughter’s birthday, insisting on trying every single flavor of cake and cupcake she could make, and not just a take-out of the best sellers, like Pepper had suggested. They weren’t just going to settle for the best sellers like some sheep following the herd. “His words, not mine” Pepper had said and having the Tony Stark to be Y/N’s first customer for her first ever catering gig would mean a lot for her business. Only recently has she decided to expand it and she felt like she’s talked Bucky’s ears off with her plans and here he was, seemingly having forgotten the day she’s most talked about. She wasn’t even angry with him, she was just disappointed and not even a little bit surprised.

“Oh shit, babe, I’m sorry I forgot,” Bucky immediately went to her and enveloped her in a hug and she hated herself for loving the feel of his arms around her.

“Promise, I’ll make it up to you,” he whispered but she didn’t believe him, she was over his empty promises.

“Just pick Lizzie up,” She said before she left the door with not a glance back.

Part 2

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky x reader #bucky barnes angst #bucky x female reader #bucky barnes imagine #bucky x you #bucky x y/n #bucky barnes #marvel angst #marvel x reader #bucky angst #bucky barnes fanfiction #marvel imagines #steve rogers x reader #betrayal

981 notes · View notes

thinfairytalex · 4 years

Text

🦴 My Ana Rules! ⚠️TW⚠️

⚠️𝘿𝙄𝙎𝘾𝙇𝘼𝙄𝙈𝙀𝙍⚠️

DO NOT VEIW IF YOU DO NOT HAVE AN ED! PLEASE DO NOT READ IT IF YOU DO NOT HAVE ONE! I WOULD TURN BACK BUT ITS TOO LATE SO PLEASE TURN BACK WHILE YOU CAN! IF YOU HAVE ONE PLEASE GET HELP IF YOURE READY! I HATE MY EATING DISORDER AND SO WILL YOU IF YOU GET ONE BECAUSE OF ME!!!!

🍴𝙁𝙊𝙊𝘿 😋

Bad foods:

👎🏼Olive Oil

👎🏼Coconut Oil (not as bad but not suggested because it tastes gross anyways)

👎🏼Avocado

👎🏼Butter

👎🏼Ghee (idk what this is but the internet just said it was fatty)

👎🏼Yogurt (Except greek)

👎🏼Cheese

👎🏼Peanut butter

👎🏼Flax Seeds

👎🏼White pasta

👎🏼Bread ESPECIALLY BAGELS

👎🏼Mashed Potatoes

👎🏼Rice

👎🏼Ranch (but ilyyyyyyy)

👎🏼Granola

👎🏼Bananas

👎🏼Corn

👎🏼Peas

👎🏼Potatoes or Sweet Potatoes

👎🏼Chips or Fries

👎🏼Raisins

👎🏼Candy or Icecream

👎🏼Pizza

👎🏼Meat other than grilled chicken (My preference)

👎🏼Buttered Popcorn (except skinny pop)

Safe Foods:

✨Fish (Salmon and Mahi are the best)

✨Grilled chicken

✨Any fruits or veggies except bananas, avocados, potatoes, corn or peas

✨Green Tea

✨Sugar Free Foods (under 100 cals)

✨Skinny Pop

✨Sugar free jello

✨Eggs

✨Chili Peppers

✨Gum

✨Dark chocolate

✨Apple Cider Vinegar (If you are willing but it may effect your teeth so i’d suggest to wash you’re mouth but not brush teeth)

✨Blue Berries (BURNS FAT!!!)

✨Cinnamon

✨Greek Yogurt

✨Raw Veggies

✨Soup

✨Salad

✨Nuts

✨Oats

✨Straight up honey

✨Water (bruh)

✨Diet Sodas (that are 0 cal)

✨Ginger

✨Any thing super low in fats and under 100 cals

I suggest eating fat burning items or low fat items and also low calorie items too so you can eat a bunch of them and not have to worry like fruits and veggies! This was just my foods list also the calories depend on the brand except for natural items so i didn’t include them. I usually try to stay under 300 calories when i’m not fasting. I also suggest eating more than i do and allowing more items i’m just strict on myself. 🍇

🏋️𝙒𝙊𝙍𝙆𝙊𝙐𝙏𝙎 💪

This is my personal but i like to have a total net of -1000 or -900 calories (because i’m so young this doesn’t even burn but 3-4 pounds a week), i suggest more like 300 a day net 😅

What i like to do to burn those calories are:

✨ My 500 calorie workout- You can find this in one of my 30 day thinspo challenges.

✨Take cold baths- For my average time i’m in the bath I burn around 399 calories check out one of my older posts on how many calories you burn when in the cold bath for a certain time.

~Also I exchange for every night (because i lovveeeeee hot baths) so i take a hot bath one night but i do 2 rounds of my 500 calorie workout and then if it’s a cold bath night i do one 500 workout and a cold bath to burn 399 calories, also that’s on fasting days. On my restrictive days i burn 300 (look up ways there’s a bunch) and then a cold bath and one workout or two workouts and a hot bath.

😑 𝘽𝙊𝙍𝙀𝘿𝙊𝙈 💤

Days with none or lack of food can feel extremely lonnnggggggggg or can be extremely boring, here are something’s i do when i’m hungry, craving, or bored and trying not to eat~

✨Look at inspiration

✨Sleep

✨Excersize

✨Scroll on tumblr

✨Listen to music

✨Brush my teeth (stops cravings and makes ur teeth pretttyyyyy)

✨Bathe

✨Online School (CoRoNa TiMe or if you actually do this)/Homework

✨Clean out my food hiding place (if parents aren’t home)

✨Draw or do art

✨Shop Online (or irl after quarantine)

✨Plan Outfits for tomorrow

✨Text my frenz

✨Walk my dog

✨Bake (! DISCLAIMER !: I UNDERSTAND BEING IN THE KITCHEN IS AWFUL FOR CRAVINGS BUT JUST ONLY THINK ABOUT NOT EATING WHAT YOU’RE MAKING AND BEING KIND AND GIVING IT TO FAMILY)

✨Write down calories for when your away from the screen and around food

✨Think about how good hungry feels compared to how that food tastes

✨Hang out with friends but not if they are going out to eat (when this is over)

✨Study

✨Watch fat people eating/Fat people mukbangs

✨Watch fat people cringe or dancing cringe

✨Look at the mirror

💔𝘾𝙊𝙉𝘾𝙀𝙍𝙉𝙎 🥺

This will be referring to your questions and concerns about your eating disorder and ,if you are not ready to receive help (please do if you can), how to reply to your parental figures, families, and friends concerns and questions.

Your Questions and Concerns~

“What about my hair falling out?”

👒 If your hair is falling out i would suggest to look up ways to keep thinning hair in good condition and also buy hair strengthening products if possible. 👒

“I can’t do this!”

💞 DO NOT i repeat DO NOT DO THIS IS YOU DO NOT WANT TO! but if you want to but believe you can’t, just remember to stay strong and you got this!!! 💞

“Is it bad that i’m so cold always?”

🧤I mean it’s going to happen, it’s a symptom of not eating and also a symptom of being thin so it’s gonna happen. I suggest just putting on a jacket or a few layers of clothes on your cold area🧤

“How do i dodge meal time?”

🍽 Dodging mealtime is the worst struggle for me like ever! I just can’t do it! I also feel awful wasting food but if it comes to being thin, there’s no choice. I usually say i’m going to the bathroom and start up a conversation before and continue talking about it while leaving so they don’t notice i’m taking my plate to the bathroom and i just put it in my hiding place in my room (that’s right next to the bathroom) and if your room isn’t close to the bathroom then find a hiding place in the bathroom wether it’s putting a container under the towels or in a shelve i’ll find a place but then take a little longer and if they ask what took so long say you were fixing your hair (if you say this do it but fast) or you were trying to clean under your nails with soap, if they notice less food say you got hungry while fixing your hair (i recommend the hair one)🍽

“Why isn’t the ABC diet/Rainbow diet/other diets not working for me but others do?”

👎🏼This is because either you didn’t count cals correctly or because you didn’t workout enough but a lot of the time these are just not not for some people like a lot of diets aren’t enough for my preferred daily weight loss or are too high calorie for me to lose anything. 👎🏼

“How do i answer questions or comments my friends and family make?”

👇🏼 Answers are below! 👇🏼

Family and friends questions, comments, and concerns~

“Have you lost weight?”

-I suggest answering like “Not that i know of” or maybe “I’ve been sick” but for that one make sure your parents know you have recently so if one of them are asked by the family member who asked they say you were or lastly “I don’t think so, but i just started putting more effort into [sport you play or are practicing] recently so maybe but if any just a little.”-

“Are you okay? I’ve noticed you’ve lost weight?”

-I would say “Oh i’m totally great! I don’t think i’ve lost weight?”-

“You look great! Have you lost weight?”

-I would reply with “Oh thank you! Maybe a little, I’ve been eating healthier lately so maybe that made my skin clearer and me a little slimmer that’s all.” and the always “Not that i know of but thank you so much! May be it’s my new [clothing item], I think it flatters me!”-

“Are you sick?”

-I would say “No, I wouldn’t be at this gathering would i?” say it in a laughing tone not rude.-

“Jeez you’re a stick”/“Oh my god you’re so skinny!”

-I think you could just roll your eyes at “Jeez you’re a stick” and say “What?” at the second one.-

“Do you have an Eating Disorder?”

-This is very risky! I would only make an excuse if you are just not ready to get help yet. Please receive help if you can! but my excuse would be “What’s that, never heard of it?” and if they explain just say “Wow thats really weird i wonder why people would act like that?!”-

“Eat.”

-Classic “I already ate.”, “No thanks maybe in a bit!” and lastly “I had a big [meal before].”-

🦷 𝙃𝙔𝙂𝙀𝙉𝙀 🧼

Here are some eating disorder hygiene issues that and i will provide ways to prevent or deal with these.

•Lack of bodily functions (urination and excretion/defecation) ✨:YES I KNOW DISGUSTANG!!! as you should know under eating and drinking (which sometimes people under drink during eating disorders?) will have the effect of lack of these practices. i don’t think there are any healthy ways to prevent this if you are restricting and i DO NOT promote laxatives they can kill you! although i would deal with this simply by just not caring and maybe eating fruit which can help lol sorry i understand this is disgusting.

•Dental Hygiene ✨: as some people know the act of purging is common which can effect your dental hygiene and can even rot your teeth. i do not promote purging (or any other disordered eating acts BUT ESPECIALLY NOT PURGING!)! it is going to hurt you physically and mentally so if anything maximum restrict. but as we know you can’t just fix it by saying that so here are some tips to prevent teeth rot from purging~ {1. Don’t brush your teeth right after! this dissolves the enamel even more! 2. Floss and rinse mouth with water/mouthwash straight after 3. if you can, chew and spit an anti-acid} also anorexia can weaken bones and as we know teeth are bones so i just advise to brush your teeth every morning and night! 🦷✨

•Body Hair ✨: I understand this is also gross too but people who don’t care enough i want you to at least have good hygiene so if you starve enough to get lanugo (excess hair growth caused by cold temperatures due to starvation). You can keep these hairs or remove them i would advise to shave so you can appear nice but if you don’t care and would like to stay warm keep the hair!

🦴 𝙇𝙊𝙊𝙆𝙄𝙉𝙂 𝙁𝙊𝙍 𝙏𝙃𝙄𝙉𝙎𝙋𝙊 💞

This is something i find very sad because it’s very exclusive. so many POC are struggling with this evil illness are rarely seen in thinspo and if so they usually aren’t just modeling by themselves but with another pale person. I suggest that if you have a certain amazing attributes to you and your body look for thin people that are like you, and also the lack of curly hair in the industry is disappointing as well. I’d also just like to say most models are white, with blonde or brown hair and blue eyes but that literally is so exclusive so please just somebody find a diverse page. I’ll be posting some if i can find any! 🌎💞

When i find more things to write about i’ll add more xx 💖

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sleepywinchester · 4 years

Text

Behind The Story S2 | Pt. 28

Summary: It’s time for JJ to start school but Y/N is not 100% on board.

Author: sleepywinchester (prev. deanwinchester-af)

Characters: Jensen, Reader, Jared, Gen and Cast Cameos.

Pairings: Single!Jensen x Actress!Reader (Nina Dobrev = Faceclaim)

Words: 2.1k

Beta: N/A

Warnings: none really :)

Visual: @clarissafairchild

Disclaimer: NO HATE TOWARDS DANNEEL!

We wuv her in this acc but this is just for science lol

Author’s Note: Y/N was definitely not ready to leave JJ at school!!! GUYS 2 CHAPTERS AWAY FROM THE FINAL CHAPTER EVER! How you guys feeling with all these chapters? Send me messages on my ask box!!! I wanna know all the feelings. As always; hope you guys like this one ♥

>>> side note: these are the last chapters ever i am not adding anyone to the tag list.

Title: First Day’s

MASTERLIST

“We’re late, we’re late, we’re late,” you repeated in whispers as the line of cars didn’t cease.

It was a rush-hour morning in beautiful Austin Texas. The sky was blue and with no sign of clouds. The cars in front and behind you honked for the line to cut short. Everyone seemed to be in a hurry to get to their destinations but not you. The location your GPS was directing you wasn’t one you were excited about. Yes, you were late but it was not affecting you as much as it honestly should.

At the sound of babbling, your eyes went to the rear mirror. They met with JJ’s soft pigtails and her bouncing head at the rhythm of Ariana’s latest hit.

An incoming call took your eyes away from your daughter and back to the dash.

“Good morning, babe,” you spoke the second you touched the green icon on your screen.

You weren’t seeing his face but you imagined the wrinkles of his eyes showing as he smiled.

“Mornin’ babe,” Jensen said. “How’s it going?”

You let a deep sigh as you hold the steer with both of your hands.

“Traffic is…,” you stopped yourself from cursing out loud, “bad. I feel like I am in L.A. of how bad this traffic is. And I honestly do not want to leave her there… It’s too early.”

“Babe, we talked about this,” Jensen said.

You rolled your eyes, “I know we’ve talked about this but- Jensen… The main reason I literally quit my job was to stay home and take care of JJ.”

“I know but it’s been a year,” Jensen said.

“Has it?” You looked at the screen with doubt.

It hasn’t felt like a year since you retired and weren’t shooting for a TV show.

“Babe, JJ needs to meet some friends,” your husband reply sounded logical but at that moment you were letting your heart rule over your head.

“She has Tom and Shep… and soon she’ll have another friend,” you said.

Jensen chuckled softly at the other end of the line. “I know you’re having trouble separating from her after all these months but she needs to learn how to communicate more and learn the colors and letters and just start a normal school journey.”

You sighed harshly again, slowly giving in to his logical thoughts.

“What if I homeschool her?” Jensen did not speak a word to your suggestion and you quickly interpret the silence on the line. “Am I being a crazy mom right now?”

“You’re not being crazy…,” Jensen said softly, “I mean, you’re being a little crazy BUT you’re just being a mom. It’s going to be okay, Y/N. I wish I could be there to experience her first day… I love you.”

A smile formed on your lips, you were having trouble separating from your daughter but Jensen was struggling with the guilt of not being a part of it.

“JJ, say hi to daddy!” You looked at her.

She instantly smiled, “Love you, daddy!”

“Love you too, little bird! Have fun at school!”

You couldn’t see his face but you knew there was a big bright smile on his face.

“Love you, babe,” you said, “I will facetime you when we’re there.”

“Alright, we’re on a break from filming so it should be good,” Jensen said. “See ya’.”

You continued to drive towards JJ’s new school. Thanks to your talk with Jensen your nerves had calmed down into the level of not being scared.

/ /

You carried JJ as you walked into the school. Her eyes instantly began to wander around the colorful walls. A smile formed on your lips noticing how her eyes sparkled with excitement.

There were parents all around the halls of the colorful school. You were grateful that you remembered the direction to JJ’s Pre-Head Start classroom from your latest visit to the school, if that weren’t the case, you would have been lost like a first-year student.

As you walked towards JJ’s classroom, you grabbed your cellphone from your pocket and called Jensen in Facetime. Who picked up the call in a matter of seconds.

“You’re there?” Jensen asked, looking down at the screen.

“Yep,” you said, realizing you were in front of the classroom.

“You’re ready little bird?” you asked your daughter.

JJ smiled big, showing her pearls and curiously looking into the colorful classroom. You looked down at the phone and found Jared and Misha had joined the Facetime call. A giggle escaped your insides and you put JJ down on her feet.

“Now you be good today and have lots of fun,” you said as you fixed her beige skirt and a pink shirt. “Okay, baby girl?”

She nodded with a smile, glancing down at the phone.

“Hi, Uncle Jared! Hi Uncle Misha!” She greeted them with excitement. “I’m going to school!”

They chuckled and smiled for JJ, “Yes sweetheart! You go have fun!”

“Baby, have fun and meet a lot of new friends!” Jensen added, “Love you.”

JJ blew her dad a kiss before giving you a kiss on the cheek and then continued to run into the room. Standing up straight you met with the Valery the teacher and smiled. Chatting about today being JJ’s first day at school.

“Well, I will be back at 3 PM. See you, JJ!” You told her and she waved before going back to play with two new classmates.

“Did she stay okay?” Jensen asked. You nodded, feeling the tears building up in your eyes. “Aw, babe! Don’t cry! Don’t be sad.”

You wiped off the tears, “I am not sad, I am happy - She is just so happy and already making friends. We - we don’t have a baby anymore.”

“She will always be our baby,” he said.

Once in the car, you took a moment to take deep breaths and get yourself together.

“Babe, I have to go back to shooting. Are you going to be okay?” Jensen asked.

You gave him a small smile, “Yeah. I’m meeting with Gen for lunch and shopping for the new baby. I’ll text you later.”

He blew a kiss and winked before ending the call. At that moment all the tears began to run wild, you didn’t know why you were crying so much but you couldn’t hold it back. You were happy for your kid, she was happy and ready to learn new things and start her education but at the same time, it was sad for you to let her go.

/ / /

It didn’t take you long to arrive at a nice Mexican restaurant in Downtown Austin. Gen was waiting for you by a table with guacamole and chips ready.

“I am so sorry for being so fucking late,” you said hugging your best friend.

Gen giggled, “It's no worries. I got here in like 20 minutes.”

You pouted as you sat down and looked at the guac, “That looks so good.”

“It is, that’s my second order,” Gen said with a big unapologetic smile.

With a giggle, you grabbed a chip and dipped in the guac. “This is amazing!!!”

“Told you,” she said caressing her pronounced belly.

You looked down at her seven months old belly. “You’re glowing.”

She smiled, “Thanks. You were right though, I thought having a girl would be a piece of cake after having two boys but girls are a handful in the belly.”

“They just don’t stay in a place,” you said. “JJ would move around my belly 24/7.”

“My girl too! Sometimes I can’t even sleep but… it’s worth it.” Gen said.

“It is,” you agreed.

You two continued to order and chatting as you munched on the chips and guac.

“You look like you've been crying,” Gen commented having a sip of her water.

“I was crying, leaving JJ at school left me so emotional,” you told her, feeling a bit of tears trying to push through. “How did you do it with Thomas and Shep?”

Gen chewed and shrugged with a small smirk, “I honestly cried my guts out too. They were so independent and ready to go and I just wasn’t but they were and I think that’s what is important. It's good for them to be ready for life and for new experiences, we just have to be here for when they need us.”

“You should write a book,” you said in awe. “It’s true… even if I am not ready, she is and that means we have done something right.”

“You have,” Gen said, “you and Jensen are the most amazing parents I’ve met and you will continue to be. Yeah,” she shrugged, “it's not always going to go the way you plan but at least it is going somewhere.”

You took a moment to take the words of your best friend. She was right, you needed to go with the flow and let your baby begin her own adventures, these ones starting with school.

“Do you want more?” Gen’s words brought you back from your thoughts.

You looked at her, with confusion in your eyes. “More what?”

“Kids,” she said, having a small sip of her juice.

Instantly you smiled, “Of course but I’m not planning it.”

Gen tilted her head and shrugged continuing to eat her meal. You also continued to eat yours. In between you two talked about her future plans for her blog and about future events that will be happening.

The rest of the evening you guys went baby clothes shopping for the future baby. Everything was so cute and it slightly gave you baby fever. You were excited for the new baby but the thought of having another kid hasn’t crossed your mind but you wondered how Jensen felt about it.

After the mall you picked JJ up in school and spent a couple more hours with Gen and her boys in the Padalecki household. Your daughter was very happy to spend more time with Tom and Shep. As you and Gen fixed dinner for them, they would play around the house.

“Hey Jules,” JJ greeted your dog as you guys walked into your house.

Instantly JJ began to play with Jules as you put everything in place.

“JJ, you need to get in the bath,” you said.

Your daughter turned and began to walk upstairs. It wasn’t always that she agreed in the first try to what you asked but it was rare times like this that were perfect. Your phone began to ring inside your bag.

“I’ll be there in a second, sweetie!” You shouted as you walked towards your bag that was in the kitchen’s island. Once in front of it, you grabbed it and smiled. It was Jensen.

“Heeeey!” He cheered through the screen.

You let out a chuckle and began your way towards JJ's bathroom.

“Hey, babe,” you smiled at the camera. “What’s up?”

“I’m at the apartment watching sports. It’s lonely here,” he said.

“Aw,” you walked into the bathroom and JJ was ready for the bath. “I’m prepping JJ’s bath,” with one twist the water began to fill the bathtub. “Say hi to daddy,” you turned the screen towards her.

“Daddy!” JJ exclaimed with excitement.

“Hey little bird!”

You could listen to your husband smile in his tone.

“How was your first day in school?” Jensen asked.

She got into the bathtub and began to play with the bubbles and toys. Meanwhile you sat and listened to their conversation about her first day. She told him about how much fun she had with her new friends. JJ liked the teacher and the classroom.

“What was your favorite thing?” You asked.

JJ took a moment to recap her day inside her mind before answering the question.

“Brownies! Mrs. Dixon had brownies.”

You chuckled, “of course that was your favorite thing.”

“Did you bring me brownies?” Jensen asked.

She shakes her head saying no, “Mommy and I will make brownies for you, daddy.”

“I love that,” he said with a smile. “Babe?”

“Yes,” you turned the phone towards you.

“I miss you,” his tone was low with a spice of sadness.

“I miss you too,” you replied, “can’t wait for Friday to be here already.”

He smiled, “I can’t wait either. Call me when JJ goes to bed?”

You smirked, “Will do. JJ say good night to daddy?”

“Good night daddy!” She shouted and followed with giggles. “Love you!”

“I love you too birdie,” Jensen said before hanging up.

_______________________________________________________

@flawsweirdo @sis-tafics @torn-and-frayed @blacktithe7 @ruined-by-destiel @kazchester-fanfiction @xtina2191 @padackles2010 @adriellej @chickenmcsade @nokillzforu @faith-in-dean @thing-you-do-with-that-thing@supernaturalyobessed@feelmyroarrrr@latinenglishfandomblog @fandommaniacx @purgatoan @capsofwinchesters�� @deansbaekaz2y5 @danijimenezv @jayankles @fuckingpisces @mskitty416 @starswirlblitz @sam-w @doro7winchester @silver-and-green @sydneymarie101195 @smoothdogsgirl @ivvitm1109 @hobby27 @typicalweirdbookworm @thisismysecrethappyplace

#jensen x reader #jensen ackles rpf #jensen x ofc #jensen ackles x reader #single!jensen x reader #spn rpf #bts #behind the story

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aqvarius · 4 years

Text

HLITF: This is not the story of your first night: Soma - otona love - chapter 4 summary/translation

anyway i guess you didn’t have to wait that long for chapter 4 but only because i couldn’t wait and had to keep reading. you can find the previous chapter here, or check my new translations page to read from the beginning. my translations masterpost is not rebloggable or mobile-friendly yet but i will update when i make one! otherwise, you can always just search the tag “summary” or “translation” on my blog or follow the links in my previous chapter posts to find the previous posts.

previously, soma had just said that what he was refraining [re: verbal attacking] from was...

naturally, he finishes his sentence outrageously:

soma: “i’m only refraining ..... in bed”

(!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) <-- btw, the mc reacts the same way

he whispers this to you so closely that his lips are basically touching your ears again.

soma: “are you displeased?”

keep reading for irritated momose, soma being the best boyfriend ever, and him asking something of you that is so predictable of him...

side note: i know you are probably all sick of me gloating about how well i understand soma that i can predict his behaviour/know what to expect but i’m just so pleased to see all this teasing and manipulation in canon. anyway how dare he ask that with such a sweet smile on his face. he knows exactly what he’s doing.

soma: “or is it better to refrain in the workplace after all?”

you say that you’d prefer that he doesn’t [use verbal attacks] in the workplace as well, but you’ll leave that up to his judgement. deliberately letting his breath fall on your ears, soma drew back with an innocent face. you lament that you really can’t win against soma.

“by the way, shouldn’t you get going soon?” soma asks.

soma: “tsugaru-san’s loyal dog-kun is about to bare his fangs” (lmaooooo)

you panic that if you wait around any longer, you’ll get bitten. so you “ittekimasu” and soma replies “itterasshai” and you run off after momose.

this is a new background!!

you apologise for the wait and momose flashes you one of these:

momose hops into the waiting car and glares silently at you. you can’t see his fangs but it really seems like he’s gonna bite you!

momose throws the case documents from tsugaru at you and tells you to hammer it into your head before you arrive at the site. you try to ask “site-?” but momose just tells you to read it to understand and then he steps on the accelerator. meanwhile i’m here lamenting the fact that we don’t have a momose driving sprite. i guess they are only reserved for real love interests ;~~;

you exclaim “isn’t it dangerous to start [the car] like that?” and momose says that they are late because of you. you apologise but plead with him to drive safely lmaooo this is so on brand.

while in the car, you start reading the case files on the target. there’s a group that has been showing suspicious movement right as a summit in tokyo is approaching and one of the members is the target this time. you’re going to the apartment that’s supposed to be their hangout.

momose doesn’t respond but no response means “yes”...

you note that there are more than 10 [more than a dozen] targets coming in and out and then momose randomly says “today is friday”. it takes a moment but you suddenly see something in the wording of the case document. turns out that every friday there’s a chance of contact with the terrorist mastermind.

“in other words, today,” says momose.

“we’ve got to hurry!” you exclaim and momose gives you that silent look again lol. you apologise, saying “who’s the one who’s been saying that...” since you were the one who kept him waiting.

“but those eyes... they’re too scary...!”

in order to escape from his accusatory glare, you turn your eyes back to the case material.

“momose-san doesn’t say a lot, so the pressure of his gaze is intense”

“in other words... a shisenzeme [”glare attack”] type?”

you inadvertently returned your gaze [at momose] that had turned away. he asks “what” and you’re like “nothing!!” you scold yourself a little because you have a job to do today and you need to concentrate on your work.

i’m just adding these backgrounds here bc i’ve never seen some of them before lol.

it’s late and you couldn’t get any results from today’s work so you return to headquarters at night. you leave the division at 9pm after doing paperwork.

“i promised i would go to soma-san’s house tonight...!” (😏😏😏)

i’m gleeful about what’s to come but also worried bc it takes me like 5 mins per slide to translate all the euphemistic sex scenes. you send him a text saying “i’m leaving [work] now!” and rush out and -

your phone chimes with a reply:

“thanks for your hard work*. i’m making paella and waiting for you.”

*otsukaresama = good job/thanks for your hard work/you’ve worked hard

i hope you’ve all realised by now that soma is the greatest boyfriend of all time i love him so much 🥰🥰🥰

clearly hlitf mc thinks the same thing:

“paella! i’m so happy!!”

soma’s immediate reply makes you smile. (same girl, same ;~~;) since soma’s paella is full of seafood, you decide to buy some delicious white wine.

“you’re arrived so late,” soma says when you arrive at his. he opens the door, looking a little displeased. you apologise and say you bought wine.

soma: “taking such a detour...”

you show him the wine but his expression doesn’t change. you wonder if he’s angry... you were working late and you wish you had come straight to his. he asks you if it’s a white [wine] from spain, and you say you think it would compliment his paella. he says it should.

soma: “a wonderful selection”

i’m so happy to be praised by him lol. you’re like “yokatta...!” (i’m glad). soma says it was worth the wait. it’s a little disagreeable when you arrived (not really sure if i translated this bit correctly) but he’s not criticising/reproaching you.

“let’s go eat,” soma says, and you say yes!!

“mm~ soma-san’s paella is the most delicious after all”

soma: “i’m honoured to receive your compliment”

he jokingly bows his head, and you enjoy a late dinner together. he says that the wine you chose is also delicious. you agree, but you apologise for keeping him waiting. he asks you if things went well [at work] and you’re like “um...” and then he apologises for asking about things related to another team’s investigation.

soma: “excuse me. i shouldn’t say anything about the contents of another team’s investigation.”

you think that you can’t talk about it even to soma, even though you got no results today.

“but [seeing you] in that state...”

“no, it’s nothing.”

you think that just now, he definitely saw through you [that you got no results]. “is that so...” you say, and soma just continues to eat while smiling as if nothing happened. you’re glad he left it there today. usually he’ll push you a little more or tease you. soma-san is good at listening to team tsugaru’s movements/happenings.

soma: “if you [eat] too slowly, it’ll be too late to take a bath”

i had to include a screenshot here bc it’s my policy whenever soma talks about baths. i bet he’s gonna ask to go in together too lmao.

you realise that’s why he didn’t ask you about this and that. you apologise that things are rushed just because you were late.

soma: “ahh, sorry... i don’t mean to blame you”

you say that ah no, you don’t feel like he was blaming/criticising you! and he says “that’s good then”.

soma: “it’s getting late, so it’ll be quicker if we go in together”

I KNEW IT I KNEW HE WAS GOING TO DO THIS!!!!! i’m ALSKJFSLDSDS?!!!!J LKSJFLDK!??!???! fLSKDJLKJF!!!!!

“soma-san grins flirtily while swirling his glass of white wine”

soma: “i got new bath salts, shall we enjoy it together?”

YESYE SLYEEYESYEYYEYESY

“could it be... i was skillfully manipulated!?”**

**it says “guided”, basically meaning he like led her into this. remember when i said mc’s entire relationship with soma was one big trap? this is what i mean lol!!

anyway, that’s the end of chapter 4! i can’t believe how quickly it went by (maybe my language skills are getting just a little better lol... or maybe i just don’t have to spend ages trying to figure out what parts of whose body are being touched in what manner in these everyday scenes lmao). i can’t BELIEVE WE GET SOMA WANTING TO BATHE TOGETHER AGAIN. i mean i can believe he because he wants to do it constantly but i’m like giddy with excitement seeing it again lmao. i love seeing overly legalistic hlitf mc as well (the fact that she was late but still nagged momose to not start the car so abruptly... sis........) and also how cute that soma made paella and waited for her a;lsjfdlsk supportive boyfriends are the best.

i hope you enjoyed this chapter, and that you’re as excited as i am for the next chapter and hopefully the inevitable bathing together scene...

i’m sure i could probably draw more traffic by updating that scandalous kazuomi story but i am selfish and i want to finish this story first bc i just can’t get enough of soma.

i’ve also set up a ko-fi page here and would be incredibly grateful if you would like to support me for translations and being able to purchase more routes to recap in english!

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gwoongi · 4 years

Text

(abandoned) all i want for christmas is woohoo

kim seokjin / kim namjoon genre: uni au, fluff, crack rating: general words: 4.9k warnings: clownery, i knew nothing about uni, character dynamics based off a fic none of u have read a/n: incomplete prequel to the yoonmin fanfic i wrote three thousand years ago. i will never finish this so here’s what i started and left behind for the dogs to have at

The stranger makes a noise of voiced agreement. “Mood.”

September 8th.

One thing they never tell you before going to Uni, is that it’s fucking mental on Move In Day.

Obviously, he had some idea that the student digs would be fairly busy with students moving in, but he never expected to be waiting in a thick line of tired and excited first years for around fifteen minutes, only to then wait another twenty just for the student- who, by the way, was way too busy picking at her purple nail varnish to give two damns about Namjoon’s clearly very important moving in schedule- to find his key on the board barely 50 centimetres away from where she was sitting.

So, yeah- when his sister comes to Uni after him, he’s definitely going to warn her about the madness that is Move In Day, because clearly nobody else had cared if Namjoon was stuck waiting like a doormat for one student who thinks she’s something to hand him a key. I mean, how hard can it be? He doesn’t get it.

“Sorry about the wait,” another male student, who noticed the lack of enthusiasm from second year student apparently named Jisoo, says as he moves from behind the desk to give Namjoon a silver key on a chain, with two other keys present. “Here are your keys- one’s for the front door of your flat, second is for the main building in-case you’re late after hours and the third is for your pigeon box.” He pauses: “no help from your parents?”

Namjoon shrugs politely, “Just me. My parents are back in Ilsang, couldn’t make it.”

“Bummer,” the student replies. Along with the keys, he shoves a brown paper bag into Namjoon’s hands with a toothy smile. “Your complimentary moving in gifts, from the students who moved out! Thanks for picking Blossom Island as your student accomodation!”

Although Namjoon wants to tell him that Blossom Island was the only cheap option out of three absurdly priced accomodations for first years, he doesn’t; instead, he smiles, lips closed and dimples on display, nodding his head and turning all within the same second. The student moves away after, so he doesn’t feel bad about ending the conversation so abruptly.

Blossom Island is located smack bang outside of campus, across a small stream that Namjoon thought would be filled with blossom, but instead is littered with algae and tinfoil. It’s large, tall like a regular apartment complex, with a courtyard out the front with a bouncy castle that Namjoon can already see some people jumping on with what he assumes is their new roommates.

Namjoon leaves the lobby- should he call it a lobby? It was more of a downstairs kitchen and living room, with two small sofas and a mounted flat-screen, a pool table pushed weirdly in the middle of the colourful boxed room and a door near the back wandering into the community study area, another door for what he guesses is for laundry. Hauling his suitcase and big, cardboard box in his arms across the courtyard, he follows the number on the key- number 8, floor 6, Kyoto Building and barely makes it five steps without almost dropping the box entirely, all thanks to some jerk wearing Thrasher and a beanie.

“That’s what you get for not tying your shoelaces.”

Mid-crouch, Namjoon looks over his shoulder and spots Min Yoongi stepping out of the building, followed by a rather proud looking set of parents, preening at the fact that their son is going into Nursing. Due to that, he bites back a curse word he figures would be impolite for the elders, and manages a smile in the sun.

“What? He clearly pushed into me,” Namjoon reasons, standing upright and saying a hasty hello to Yoongi’s parents, who, in all honesty, have never really liked him much. He laughs breathily, waiting for a few seconds before asking, “where are you?”

Yoongi checks his key. “Number 13, Floor 0, Juko Building. What kind of name is Juko, anyway?”

“Beats me,” Namjoon scoffs. “I think Juko’s close to Kyoto. I’ll come visit when you’re all settled and moved in, yeah?”

Yoongi nods, already beginning to walk away. “Yeah, I’ll get your mug out ready.”

That’s the thing with Yoongi, Namjoon thinks as he walks away; he’s always been about the little things in life. In the many, many years that Namjoon has known Yoongi, he’s never really changed- Yoongi has always been compassionate and cutely caring, buying two mugs instead of one and making pasta for two when he knew Namjoon was due to visit on days his parents were working late. And he feels bad, because Yoongi is a giving guy, not a receiving one.

He watches as Yoongi leaves with his parents, and he feels weirdly sad. It’s none of his business, too, as he watches the three Min’s enter the Juko Building, painted a pastel pink with mint compliments, swirling patterns dancing as the leaves on the trees move in the whisper of wind.

Namjoon now has the urge to paint.

In Number 8, Floor 6, Kyoto Building, Kim Seokjin finally sets down the last potted plant on the sparse looking shelf above his desk, and he steps back with his hands on his hips to admire the minimal effort. Although it definitely took some struggle, what with his Dad accidentally dropping his bag with his Nintendo inside and his Mother judging his absurd amount of pink bath-towels, Seokjin has a feeling in his stomach- the feeling where you know that everything is going perfectly.

There’s a smell in the air; blossom from the large tree outside his window, propped open on the hatch to allow a breeze air out the room. Since his roomie hasn’t arrived yet, the least he can do is get rid of the stuffy smell, something strangely similar to pool chlorine. He inhales it deeply, a smile tugging at his lips. Seoul weather amazes him- even though Gwacheon is a blink away, Seokjin is already starting to feel like a new person.

Maybe it’s just University excitement. Maybe it’s University nerves. But, maybe it’s also because he really needs a wee and can’t think properly.

He waits nicely for his parents to finish up straightening every single crease in his bedsheets before saying goodbye. Although he might tease to their faces that he won’t miss them, and they won’t miss him, Seokjin knows from the minute they open the door to head back out to the corridor that it’s going to take a while to adjust to life without the nagging, but endearing, guidance of his family.

Because Seokjin has always sort of been the baby boy of the Kim’s from Gwacheon- his older brother inherited a type of broodiness that Seokjin is thankful he hasn’t got yet, and so Seokjin’s always been the favourite. The favourite crawler, the favourite footballer, the favourite baker and painter- in honesty, Seokjung never wanted any of that. Seokjin’s proud of who he is- he’s so fucking proud of his family. So he sort of takes pride in being the baby boy of the Kim family. He wears it like armour, glistening armour that represents him in front of a whole army of potential threats and friends.

Jinyoung, an old friend, used to say it was embarrassing- as if Jinyoung doesn’t have a comfortable enough life with parents who would murder for him, but Seokjin doesn’t care. Why should he be ashamed of being loved? Most families aren’t as close as the Kim’s, so he takes extra care in making sure his family know that he loves them. That’s the sort of guy he is- giving, occasionally receiving, but giving, giving his whole heart and soul to everybody else in order to make others happy.

Seokjin pinches the bridge of his nose as the door closes with a sickening click, the noise muting around the faint buzz of traffic across campus and the baby birds in the nest a few floors down on a branch, fluttering in the wind like wings. He’s so lost in the way the small twigs are woven together, like the way a spider builds a web, or an ant a colony, that he doesn’t realise three minutes have passed.

Now he really needs a wee.

When Namjoon opens the door to room 8, he’s surprised.

Not shocked, but surprised. Because there’s a difference between shock and surprise- shock is entering a room and finding a serial killer, but surprise is walking into a room and finding a party. The difference is in the level of reaction, and Namjoon hadn’t walked in and been completely thrown off by a wall of cute posters and the obvious collection of DS games and a cool looking computer. If anything, he’s intrigued. Surprised. Pleasantly surprised, perhaps.

To the right, Namjoon hears the toilet flush and he knows that he has a couple seconds to look around the room and plonk his bags and box on the plain bed before his roommate emerges from the bathroom. As he sets them down, he casts a gaze towards the right side of the room where his roomie has claimed a bed, a desk and a small looking wardrobe near the door. On the wall next to his bed, a collection of posters have been washi taped to the boring blank canvas- although, as an artist, Namjoon considers anything blank and white to be inviting and anything but boring, because a canvas holds endless opportunities- and his bed covers are a washed out blue, a colour that now, actually, as he’s looking at it, is becoming more chiffon coloured.

It’s evident his roommate likes video games- half the posters on the wall are related to games he knows that they must like; Animal Crossing, a small Stardew Valley postcard and a commissioned drawing of Jinx from LoL, taped next to a large artwork of Mario Kart and more postcard art of games Namjoon thinks he’s heard of but isn’t sure- The Last of Us, Tekken, Zelda. He pretends not to notice the small Minecraft postcard in the corner of the mural but weirdly enough, he finds it endearing knowing that someone at University still plays Minecraft.

Most of all, Namjoon notices the strange obsession with The Sims, as seen through multiple artworks and the fantastic collection of Sims3 Expansion packs sitting on the shelf above his bed, next to pop figures and a photo frame of a group of friends.

He wonders if his roommate will let him use the expansion packs when he’s bored.

“Oh, hey.”

Clearly having not heard the bathroom door open, Namjoon spins on the spot to look back at the bathroom, where his roommate stands with his hand animatedly raised in a wave, a smile lifting his cheekbones. They look pale, almost watery, but Namjoon doesn’t say anything. He knows why.

“Hey. Namjoon,” he says, leaning forward to shake his hand. For a moment, his roommate stares at the hand, as if wondering what to do with it. “What?”

His roomie shakes his head, moving to shake his hand once, up and down, before letting it drop. “Nothing. It’s just, well, how many people give handshakes nowadays?”

Namjoon thinks it over in his head. “Well, a lot of people. Useful in business, and stuff. A manager might want to shake your hand at a job interview.”

As he says the words, Namjoon can tell by the passing look on his roommates face that he wasn’t expected to give an answer. He stops talking after that, looking back to his bed with a feeling similar to embarrassment, while his roommate moves towards the window and clears his throat awkwardly.

“Seokjin.” He finally introduces himself. Seokjin- it has a ring to it. Namjoon says it over in his head, growing familiar with it. Now that he’s mentioned it, Namjoon looks back over his shoulder and realises that he looks like a Seokjin. The name suits him. “What’re you studying here?”

“Art and Design,” Namjoon replies with a brief smile over his shoulder. Seokjin isn’t looking, anyway. “Nothing too crazy.” He looks at the wall of posters- “Are you studying graphics?”

“Yeah. I’m studying Digital Art,” Seokjin replies, and it’s clear in the way his whole body moves as he says it that he’s passionate about his subject. He laughs shortly, “Isn’t it funny how we’re both doing art and we got pushed together? Do you think that’s intentional?”

Namjoon shrugs, taking out his clothes first from one of his suitcases. “Maybe. I’m glad you’re Digital Art and not Performing Arts. One, this room is not big enough to dance and sing and two, I don’t want to be woken up by a classical alarm clock. You know?”

Seokjin laughs and it suffices as a reply.

As Namjoon sifts around his bag and pulls out the remainder of his clothes, Seokjin turns around and watches for a swift three seconds, and then moves back towards his desk and absent-mindedly moves around his keyboard, straightening it up.

“Do you need any help?” he asks, and as Namjoon turns to catch his eye, he notices he means it genuinely.

“Uh, I’m alright,” Namjoon replies, and even though Seokjin can clearly see the amount of work he has left to do to his half of the bedroom, he doesn’t pry and decidedly drops it. He shrugs.

“Alright then. I’m gonna head out,” Seokjin says. He gestures with his head to the hallway. “Out on campus, they’re doing that thing. What do they call it- Wildflower? I think I just wanna go meet some people. I can wait for you, and we can go together, if you want?”

Namjoon does want. He really wants to. But he takes several glances back at his boxes and frowns deeply. And anyways, he’ll have plenty of time to hang out with Seokjin later, won’t he?

“I’ll pass,” Namjoon rejects him softly, a smile on his lips as if to say, I do want to come but I’m way too busy. Seokjin’s lips twitch into a pursed mouth and he nods. “I’ve just got a lot to do. We could hang out later, if you want?”

“Sure,” Seokjin replies, already inching towards the door. “Yeah, alright. If you need help, just text me. I’ve got my number on the pinboard above my desk- just incase, you know?”

Namjoon glances over; surely enough, on a corkboard pinned to the wall above his desk and beneath the shelf, he can see the sleek black letters printed with “emergency number” written next to it in messy handwriting. He smiles, mostly because he’s never seen someone have their own phone number hung up in their room before, and nods without looking in Seokjin’s direction. “Okay, thanks, Seokjin-ssi.”

Seokjin makes a sound similar to a laugh, air through his nose, a small intake of high pitched breath afterwards. Out the corner of his eye, Namjoon can see him hovering his hand over the handle and to be polite, he finally looks over. Something tells him he was waiting for that.

“Seokjin should be fine,” Seokjin replies with a smile.

By the time Namjoon finishes sorting out his things (and by sorting out, he means that he’s hung up his clothes and kicked the cardboard box towards his desk out of the way), Seokjin’s still not back from Wildflower, and quite frankly, he’s bored.

As if by a magnetic pull, he finds himself leaving Kyoto building to trudge in the mid-move-in-manic, across the small courtyard where the bouncy-castle has deflated thanks to someone jumping on it wearing shoes, and towards Juko building, a big clump of pastel next to the white blossom tree that Namjoon is jealous of. Yoongi’s room, even back at his home in Daegu- where Namjoon had lived throughout his entire high-school life before his parents moved back to Ilsang during his final year-, was somewhere Namjoon had felt completely and utterly accepted. At home.

He always found it funny how Yoongi said the same thing for him- his bedroom back home was small, smaller than the dorm room he has now. It was an average room, with small bold letters spelling out his name on the front of his door, and his walls were painted a navy blue with dark wood floors that went through the entire house, with thrown around covers and three pillows to sleep with and furniture which didn’t match the colours. But Yoongi’s room was different. Yoongi’s room was Yoongi.

Slanted ceilings and an off-white coloured paint-job on the walls, with grey curtains and white sheets and an electric piano pushed up against the window-wall, overlooking a small line of houses out the front of the street Yoongi lived on, a tree that turned orange in October. On his walls, Yoongi liked to keep it minimal, minus the posters of his favourite artists and a little area above his desk for pictures of him and Namjoon, his first family pet, a ticket to his first family vacation when he was thirteen, dried flowers from a tiny bundle he was given on a Valentine’s Day. His first Valentine’s gift. A memory. A wall of memories, stuck with shimmery tape and dried blue-tac on the white, unremovable, stuck like glue. It was everything Namjoon wanted in a room. It was everything Namjoon needed in a place to feel completely and utterly safe.

Namjoon wasn’t surprised that Yoongi had stuck with the bland style of dorm room, compared to the bed next to him which his roommate- a kid studying Music with an incredible obsession with BoA and Michael Jackson- who, even though he was an amazing artist, Namjoon always felt weirded out by.

He stands by the doorframe as Yoongi shuffles to straighten his blanket at the end of his bed, simply looking at the decor, taking it all in with a deep breath. His roommate stared at Namjoon waiting in the doorway and pulled his lips to a frown, excusing himself, “...heading to Wildflower, bye,” being the only words he ever said to Namjoon.

“Namjoon, I hate it.”

“You’ve been here for two hours,” Namjoon frowns, sitting on his roommate’s bed. He won’t mind (only he does, and he notices the imprint of Namjoon’s arse left behind which he thought would disappear after five minutes.) “It’s not that bad, surely?”

Yoongi shakes his head adamantly. “I wanna go home, Joon. I don’t wanna do nursing.”

“You might really like it, though,” Namjoon sighs. “You never know!”

“I don’t want to study nursing,” Yoongi repeats himself through pouted lips that Namjoon can hear. “I wanted to do art, or music like my stupid roommate. I don’t know why I’m here, Namjoon, I really don’t know why I’m doing this to myself.”

Namjoon knows it’s hard for Yoongi. His family expect too much- like most parents, actually, Yoongi knows they want the best for him. But, the best isn’t forcing him into a nursing degree.

Toying with the frays on Yoongi’s roommate’s blanket, Namjoon says, “hey, hey, calm down. It’s fine- if you don’t like the first three classes, you can’t be expected to stay. You’ve got to do what you want to do.”

Yoongi bites his lip before replying. “I have nowhere to go if I drop out. I’ll do a year, maybe. Maybe half a year. Oh, I don’t fucking know. I don’t wanna give up and let down my family, you know?”

Namjoon does know. His parents had wanted him to be a lawyer. His sister, Kyungmin, wanted Namjoon to do something with his music. But, like the delinquent he is, Namjoon always knew he had a passion for art. Drawing made him happiest- letting his thoughts draw something on a blank canvas was the closest thing to real magic. Singing your feelings is one pleasure, but capturing the colours and movements onto paper was something Namjoon found absolutely rewarding. Thankfully, his parents knew there was no point in forcing him into doing something he wouldn’t enjoy. He was lucky.

“Yeah, I know.”

Yoongi knows Namjoon knows, and he also knows Namjoon doesn’t know what to say. He pulls at the bridge of his nose and lets out a low grunt. “Anyway. How’s your roomie? A weirdo?”

Namjoon shakes his head. “No, not really. I mean, he’s really into video games but it’s not overbearing. Kinda endearing. He’s fun. Seokjin.”

“Oh, cool,” Yoongi replies, nodding slowly. “You get all the good stuff, you know that?”

“What’s mine is yours,” Namjoon says with a frown.

At that, Yoongi smiles. “Yeah. I know, Joon.”

Wildflower lives up to the frantic Google search that Seokjin did moments before heading down to check it out. Even before arriving, he could smell the variety of foods on rickety stalls, and hear the experimental strum of a live band getting ready to play near the main building to the University campus.

Ducking his head underneath the waving arm of another female first-year, Seokjin took a stroll around the small section of Wildflower, politely looking at the bits and bobs he could purchase, like complimentary University flags and tapestries for walls, or a coffee where the change went to a local suicide-prevention charity. He bought one, a tea that was too milky for his taste, and continued walking.

He hadn’t bought much change with him. After the rather awkward first meeting with Namjoon, Seokjin had let it slip his mind. Regardless, he wasn’t willing to let the lack of coins and a credit card spoil his First Day mood. Inhaling the smell of a nearby Jjinmandu stand, he let his stomach steer him towards it, collecting the spare change in his pocket- luckily for him, he had around 4,000 in his jacket pocket which more than comfortably paid for a portion of Mandu.

“Here you go,” the server hands Seokjin his small paper dish of Jjinmandu with a smile, a smile that reminded Seokjin of his third-year teacher back when he was a child. Warm, inviting, kind, a mother’s smile. She smiled toothily when Seokjin handed her more than he was being charged, saying it was a tip, first day luck, or something. She bowed her head meekly.

Without wanting to hold up the slightly growing line, Seokjin moves out of the way and towards a small cluster of metal tables and chairs, shivering as the umbrellas moved in the wind, passing the sauces with a thoughtful pause. He has time to kill; he puts his dish on the small counter and puts a tiny blob of sauce in the corner, and he dips his finger in to taste it. He recoils visibly, finding the taste too bitter.

From somewhere behind him, Seokjin hears what sounds like laughter and he turns, surprised, and finds another student with a bright orange lanyard hung around his neck. He’s a total stranger, with hair pushed into a black beanie and a denim jacket covering a brown shirt, with some black jeans with the knees cut out. On his feet, worn out Converse. Seokjin does a double take.

“You know that’s spicy BBQ, right?”

Weirdly enough, Seokjin finds that he sounds exactly like what he thought he would. He stares at his glasses, first, and the way they slide down his nose, slightly oily because of the heat.

“Don’t you usually have teriyaki with Mandu?” he continues, wandering over to glance at the bottles of sauce, before pushing a slightly stained bottle towards Seokjin with a smile. “There. Honestly, scrape off the BBQ, this will taste so much better.”

Seokjin feels dumb. “I only usually have the tomato chilli. “

“Yeah, and BBQ?”

“No,” he replies, and then he laughs quietly, “no, never BBQ. Let’s call that...first day experimenting.”

The stranger nods along, shoving a mouthful of his own Mandu. Seokjin wants to point out that he has sauce on the corner of his mouth, but it feels rude. He barely knows him.

Glancing at the lanyard around his neck, Seokjin finishes his mouthful- “Are you staff?”

“What?” the stranger asks, caught off guard. Then, he looks down at the lanyard and smiles, politely, not in mockery, and shakes his head, disturbing feathery hairs that were once tucked up into the beanie. “Oh, no. No, I’m a first year.” He chortles at Seokjin’s stunned expression. “What, do I look really old?”

“No,” Seokjin replies. “I was just...surprised. I don’t know- today’s been weird for me. I’m all over the place.”

The stranger makes a noise of voiced agreement. “Mood.”

They stand in silence for a couple moments after that, eating, staring off at the little stream that ran around the perimeter of the small square, listening to the sound of the live band kicking off their setlist with a slow song appropriate for the weather.

The stranger swallows his Mandu, pointing at Seokjin with his spork without really realising, “oh, I’m Hoseok by the way.”

Hoseok. A name to the face.

“Seokjin,” he replies. Now he’s finished his Jjinmandu. “Digital Art.”

Hoseok makes a noise. “Woah, no way.” Gesturing to himself, “Art and Music.”

Seokjin wants to laugh. “That’s so weird. My roomie also does art. It’s like I’ve been thrown into a pool full of art students.”

“Yeah. Well, we are in the Arts Square. Wouldn’t it be weird if I was doing Chinese studies and I hung around in the Arts Square on my first day?”

“True,” Seokjin nods.

Talking to Hoseok is easy. It’s so fucking easy- it’s as if Hoseok has been a friend for years. They walk together, along the small path that barely fits them both, weaving around the stream. Seokjin learns that Hoseok is from Gwangju, and has a sister who designs clothing in the city. Hoseok, in return, learns that Seokjin barely escaped being a lawyer and comes from a family inheriting endless zeros. It doesn’t bother him. It usually bothers people.

“It’s cool that you got to do what you wanted to,” Hoseok says as they walk further along campus. Now, they’ve reach the on-campus convenience store, the artificial lighting making Hoseok squint, even though daylight still pushed on. “Most kids don’t when they’re in your kind of position.”

Hoseok quickly looks over, “I don’t mean that in a bad way, I only-”

“No,” Seokjin agrees, nodding and thrusting his hands into his pockets. He dips his head upwards, inhaling the smell of the sunshine, before looking at Hoseok with a friendly smile. “No, you’re right. Most kids don’t. I’m lucky.”

Hoseok’s grateful Seokjin didn’t misunderstand. “Hm, maybe we’ll be in each-other’s classes.”

He says it with a hopeful tone, lightly nudging Seokjin’s shoulder with a small smile, that caused dimples to spread across his lower cheeks.

“I hope so,” Seokjin replies, but the sound of the stream covers it. Hoseok keeps walking, not making it known if he heard. He probably hadn’t.

Namjoon rolls over the next morning, not quite remembering how he got home and when, and squints at the Sepia screen of his phone. It reads 6:45am, too fucking early to be awake on a Saturday.

did you get home ok yoongi

dont think i care about you or anything yoongi

Namjoon snorts quietly, wincing when he thinks he’s woken up Seokjin across the room. But, when he looks over towards Seokjin’s side of the dorm, he notices that he’s not even in bed. His sheets are tucked in tightly, and his jacket is absent on the coat hangers on the back of the door.

Holy shit, Seokjin gets up early.

yeah. hows minjoon, the name robber joonie

seriously fuck off he’s playing fred videos yoongi

it’s fucking 7am yoongi

Namjoon scoffs, mostly to himself- because who else is he going to scoff too?-, and rolls over flatly to press his feet onto the flattened out carpet of his room. The sun barely peeks through the shitty curtains, and he yawns loudly, feeling the euphoria of a morning stretch. Namjoon sighs with pleasure at the feeling of his body stretching out, letting his arms drop and grabbing his phone to reply to Yoongi, who Namjoon’s surprised is awake, even when Fred is involved.

i thought fred had died, fr joonie

bitch me too but here we have his channel, still screeching away about rubber sharks in his tiny swimming pool yoongi

im really not joking joon. i wanna quit so bad i’ve been here less than 24 hours and i’m already fantasising about drinking the bathroom bleach yoongi

He’s about to reply when the door to their dormitory room swings open, and the hostility of the swing almost makes him drop his phone on the floor. Namjoon scrambles to catch it, staring up with surprise at the sight of Seokjin carrying two mugs of what appears to be tea. Namjoon smells the cranberry as Seokjin comes closer with a sheepish, yet almost smug, smile. Bare in mind, Namjoon hates cranberry tea; at the smell he smiles and fakes joy.

“Saw your post-it saying you had to set an alarm for seven,” Seokjin said casually. “Figured you’d be up by the time I came back with this...hope you like cranberry.”

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honeymoonjin · 5 years

Text

Chapter Eleven

Summary: When you hear that your recently deceased grandmother left you her property in her will, at first you think that a dinky old cottage in the middle of nowhere isn’t going to mean much for you. But after spending a night there, you discover something far more valuable than the house itself: a hidden door that leads to another time, the same place but over 200 years in the past. In the late 18th Century, there is a king who will die before his 21st birthday unless you can save him. Will you help him, even if it means leaving your own life behind?

A/N: This chapter is a little different, it’s in Yoongi’s point of view. I was going to make it Chapter 10.5 since it kind of occurs alongside Chapter 10 chronologically, but I didn’t want anyone thinking it wasn’t necessary to the plot, because it definitely is. Let me know what you think!

"Can't you just let me go with you, hyung? I'll be good!"

This kid. Yoongi shakes his head firmly, hurriedly grinding some herbs together for a last-minute clarity charm. "You mess up enough here as it is. I can't leave something like this up to you. Besides, Y/n specifically asked for me to go, didn't she?"

The shaman tries to ignore the way Taehyung fixes his puppy dog eyes on his elder. "But what will I do when you're gone? I'll be all bored and alone."

Tipping the ground herbs into a small vial, Yoongi's voice is flat as he makes sure the vaguely green dust makes its way into the vessel. "Then go back to the palace and keep Y/n company. Make sure she doesn't do anything stupid. Alright, I need to leave. Be sure to leave the portal door open, but lock the front door with the hex charm; do you remember it?"

Taehyung seems affronted at the suggestion. "Of course I can do a hex charm, Yoongi. I'm not incompetent, you know..."

Yoongi straightens up and stares at the boy who's pouting in the kitchen. Feeling a sliver of guilt, he sighs and runs a hand through his hair. "Listen," Yoongi says, voice gruff but apologetic, "I'm just making sure. I'm trying to keep you safe."

"Forget about it," Taehyung mutters under his breath, studiously ignoring his elder as he grabs an apple for the road and shrugs on a coat. "I'm going, like you wanted."

Yoongi winces when the heavy wooden door slams behind his assistant, and he stands in silence, listening to the the light scrape of Taehyung’s fingernail against the door, paired with the muttering of an ancient Chinese spell. Most of the magic Yoongi used nowadays were more modern Korean methods, but for the more basic enchantments, it was common to use the original spells.

Finally, all was quiet again. Yoongi cleared his throat to try and break the melancholic gloom he had slipped into, and double-checked the minimal belongings on his person before he left. He was not going to be in the modern world long, would not even have to leave the confines of the house itself, but Yoongi never went anywhere without a small leather pouch of basic ingredients tucked into his belt, the glass vial of a clarity charm dangling on a cord around his neck, and a small blade in his boot. All things proceeding as planned, he wouldn’t need them.

The first thing Min Yoongi noticed about the future was how clean and bright everything was. Gone were his heavy curtains, dark walls and sooty hearth. He emerged out into a hallway (something only palaces were large enough to have in his time, but he was familiar with them nonetheless) with a strange spongy fabric floor and impossibly straight, flat walls that appeared painted uniformly. He couldn’t imagine the finesse it would take a painter to manage to evenly coat this expansive surface without leaving streaks. Perhaps magic was more commonplace in this day.

Yoongi had been here once before, to lure Y/n back to his time, but he had transformed into a cat, then, and it was the middle of the night, rather than the break of day. Unsure which direction to go, he followed the hallway left, until he made it to the very end. “She said the communication device was in her sleeping quarters. Here, she wrote down some instructions for its use.” Yoongi felt for the note again in his pocket, comforted by the crisp edge of the thick paper. He had read that note to the point of rote-memory, but was glad it was there anyway. All Yoongi had to do was locate a bedroom, and then the ‘phone’ would be on a wooden stand beside it. He was actually feeling some excitement unfurl within him to find this device; from Y/n’s description, it sounded like a very complexly enchanted item.

As Yoongi made his way from room to room methodically, ignoring everything that wasn’t a bed (even though he was desperately curious to try out the bath – something he recognised from his time, but seemed far more refined) he thought over his previous encounter with Taehyung.

Was there really such a need for Taehyung to take everything to heart all the time? That boy was too sensitive for his own good. It would get him hurt one day.

When Taehyung and Yoongi met, almost three years ago, the shaman wasn’t looking for anyone. In fact, he had sworn off ever taking an assistant again after… what had happened with the last one, but Taehyung was insistent. His parents didn’t want him working on their farm anymore, he had said, and the King’s Guard wouldn’t take him in. He would have nowhere else to go. Perhaps Yoongi should’ve seen that as a sign that the boy wasn’t a particularly capable worker, but instead he had opened his arms and welcomed him in. He never had been able to say no to a pretty face. Yoongi thought maybe that was his biggest flaw yet.

Behind the fourth or fifth door, past the small door in the wall from whence he came, Yoongi found a bed, wider and more lushly decorated than the modest shelf-and-blanket combination he had. Letting out a gasp of relief at the chance to distract himself from the memories of his assistants, he rushed forward into the room, scanning it for a wooden stand.

Directly to the right of the bed is a short, squarish cabinet. On top is a small metal box with glowing red numbers, a very glossy and crisp book, and a small black device. Yoongi consults with the slip of paper, and tentatively touches the tip of his finger to a protruding button. Gasping with wonder as the surface lights up, Yoongi realizes there are words on the screen, all gathered in small boxes. He takes the time to read some of them, having to re-press that button as the screen keeps going dark after a few moments.

Jimin, 8:21pm: r you still busy at the house? can u please just text me back baby, if ur busy thats okay, im just a little worried out u, thats all… it’s getting late…

Jimin, 10:49am: okay, im heading off to work, flick me a text when u get this xxx

Jimin, yesterday 5:11pm: we dont have to if you don’t want to

Jimin, yesterday 4:28pm: date night tonight? xxx i feel like i havent seen you in ages baby xxx

There are more, but they disappear out the bottom. Yoongi frowns. He thinks he remembers this Jimin; if memory serves, it was the sleeping male curling up to Y/n when he briefly visited her dreamscape. Yoongi had been so caught up in making sure she fulfilled her end of the deal that he had almost forgotten she had a life outside of their time. Those messages were a sobering reminder of how much Yoongi was asking from her. How much she was giving up. He didn’t like that feeling.

Clearing his throat noisily in the early evening silence, he picks up the device delicately and places it on the bed, flattening out the note beside it. Y/n’s instructions make sense as he follows along, although it takes him a while to work out what she means by ‘text bubble icon’.

Once he reaches that screen, and clicks on the name ‘Jimin’, those same messages appear, but in a different format. “I’ve already seen these,” he tells the device. The device does not respond. “I seek to create one of my own.” He sighs. The magic on this glass apparently cannot react to voice, only touch. He reaches out and clicks on the small white box that says ‘iMessage’ in grey. “Yes, I do want to message,” he mumbles distractedly. A large array of small letters appears below. Y/n wrote down to tap each square to write the letter. It seems an awfully impersonal way of writing, and it takes Yoongi quite a long time to tap out what Y/n has asked him to write, as well as pressing a small blue arrow to the right, which pushes the message upwards, resting directly below those from the Jimin.

omg im so sorry i missed these jiminie ㅠ ㅠ i hope ur not too worried.

im ok, just not been feeling great so ive been sleeping a lot! im not sure yet if its contagious so pls dont come out, i know uve got that show coming up and i dont want u to get sick ok!

love you lots baby!

Yoongi sighs once he finishes, resting back on the bed, but soon three bouncing dots appear in a box. He watches them dance, fascinated, wondering what this could mean, until they change into words. Y/n did tell him that Jimin would be likely to reply and had simply written on the bottom of the note, ‘no apostrophes, or capital letters, call him baby or jiminie, and make sure he doesn’t come out to the house!’

Jimin: omg thank god ur safe i was worried!!! i can bring u round some fresh soup and we can have a night in xxx ive already had my flu jab so i wont get sick i promise lol xx

Yoongi swears, trying to speed up his reply, double-checking Y/n’s rules as he goes.

thank you, baby, thats very kind of you. but please dont come out, im just going to go to sleep and hope that this sickness passes in time. i will notify you once

But before he can finish crudely dictating a message, a series of three hard raps echoes through the house. Yoongi stands up ramrod stiff. Surely the Jimin boy hadn’t arrived so soon? Although, Yoongi supposes transport must be more efficient in this time. He bites his lip nervously. Surely, it would be best to go ask him to leave. It was Y/n’s intention that Jimin did not come to the house, since she herself was absent, and Yoongi could not have the boy roaming around and discovering the portal’s entrance.

“Y/n?” a deep voice calls out, muffled through the walls. Yoongi swears under his breath and pockets the small device and the note, getting off the bed to go find the front door. “Are you there?” Hurrying faster, the shaman eventually locates a door with a clouded glass panel revealing a tall shadow. He fumbles with the doorknob, having to twist a key (thank God that technology hasn’t changed) to unlock it, and throws it open with a nervous huff. The man blinks once, furrowing his eyebrows. “Uh…hi?”

“Yes, hello,” Yoongi blurts out hastily, eyes roaming over the tall man. Although he saw Jimin in very dim lighting, it’s easy to tell that this is not the same man. “Who are you?”

The man is wearing rough-looking blue pants with a belt, and a tunic that’s cut at his hips instead of his legs. He holds a hand out to Yoongi. Yoongi stares at it until the man coughs and lowers it. “My name’s Namjoon. I didn’t mean to interrupt, I’m just here to speak to Y/n.”

“What-” Yoongi’s words catch in his throat when he lifts his gaze from the man’s odd attire to his face. It can’t be. A bolt of deeply-repressed hurt cuts through him. He recognizes those dimples, that smile, even the name is the same as his. It was a face he never thought he’d see again. But, no. It isn’t him. The more Yoongi looks at him closely, the man going a little red in the cheeks under the sudden scrutiny, Yoongi can see the finer details aren’t right. His Namjoon had a narrow nose, more delicate face. His Namjoon wasn’t as tall and was skinnier too. This man in front of him bore shocking resemblance, but it wasn’t him. It wasn’t his Namjoon. Sensing he had been silent too long, Yoongi blinks away the tears that threaten to well. “What for?”

“Oh, uh, it’s kind of private business, dude. Sorry, I didn’t catch your name.”

“Y/n’s sick,” Yoongi says instead, “so I’m afraid you can’t come in. I’m more than happy to pass on a message.”

The man who looks so much like his former assistant furrows his brows. “I’m sorry, who are you? I’d like to speak with her. I’ve been doing some more research for her, you see, really cool stuff on-”

“I’m her doctor,” Yoongi says instead, “I’m concerned she may be contagious, so I’ve advised her not to have guests. If you have the research with you, perhaps I can bring it inside. I’m sure she’d appreciate you coming.”

The guy laughs awkwardly, then digs into a bag at his side for a stack of pieces of paper bound in some floppy, slippery pink material. “I didn’t have time to pick up a ringbinder, so the photocopies are loose, but I managed to dig up quite a bit of the history on the Jeon reign, as well as all the following generations. It’s interesting! Hopefully she’ll get some use out of it.” The man hands the research over, craning his neck to try and glance down the hallway. “Can you tell her hi for me? And that I’m sorry for stopping by without texting ahead.”

Yoongi nods, half in a daze. He doesn’t know this strange feeling in his chest; does he want this Namjoon-not-Namjoon man to leave and never think about him again, or does he wish he would stay so that Yoongi can see just how much similarity there was? The thought comes too late, as the man turns and skips down the gravel path, getting into his car and pulling away without a second look back.

The shaman shuts the door, returning the key to its previous position, and sinks down on the floor. First Taehyung acting up, reminding him of his last assistant, and now this. The fates were being cruel today.

Forgetting about the small device still in his herbs pouch, Yoongi quickly returns to the hallway and crawls through the doorway and back into his own time, trying to ignore the hot tears that gather under his chin.

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53 notes · View notes

punkscowardschampions · 4 years

Text

James & Ava

James: I can't see you today Ava: Oh Ava: Well, that's a shame James: it is Ava: What are you up to? James: my dad wants me in the office Ava: Ahh, okay Ava: Well no worries, Monday then James: I won't let anything stop me Ava: I understand Ava: It's cool James: if I can find time to call you later, hearing your voice would make me feel better about a lot of things Ava: That'd be nice Ava: really nice James: missing you is the nicest cliche I think I've experienced James: for a long time Ava: I can't stop thinking about you Ava: so it's good to know you've thought about me too James: of course I have James: I am James: it's what's going to get me through today Ava: Oh James Ava: I'm going to talk to you all day, in my head James: I was going to take you to [insert a cute date location that wouldn't take very long to get to because he wouldn't have had long] so make sure you tell me what you think Ava: Would it be entirely too tragic for me to go alone and pretend you're with me? James: no more tragic than if I ask you to take enough pictures for me to be able to pretend that I'm there Ava: Of course Ava: I owe you for my picture of you 🥰 James: you don't owe me anything James: I'd give you so much more if I could Ava: Me too, I wish I could take pictures just for you Ava: Have to get old school and get a P.O. box James: or keep them on your phone & show me when you can Ava: That I can do James: but will you? Ava: If you tell me how much you want it James: the only thing I want more is to see you in person Ava: I really, really miss you Ava: It, I can feel it James: I'm really sorry, darling Ava: It's not your fault Ava: and it reminds me it's real James: It's my fault James: I could stand up to my dad & say I don't want to work there Ava: If it were that simple, you would've Ava: it's security for your family Ava: you can't just do it without a backup plan in place Ava: least of all for me James: I should have a backup plan James: it's bullshit that I don't Ava: You can make one Ava: you'll have a degree and experience now Ava: you can at least apply to other places with that, get out from under your dad, then think about what you want longterm after that James: Oh Ava Ava: You can, and you will Ava: You're like just finished with Uni now Ava: who knows what they're doing before then, you only have to front you do because children James: I want you to be right Ava: I am Ava: You're smart and driven and good James: how do you know? Ava: Because I said, you can't live like this forever Ava: and you won't Ava: what's the alternative? James: that actually she's right James: everything she says & thinks about me Ava: She's not Ava: She's not right about anything and she knows it Ava: that's why she has to go so hard James: you're right because you said I need you & I do Ava: I'm right because it's true Ava: you're worthy of good things, James James: I'm not a good person, Ava James: I'm barely a person at all Ava: But you are, James Ava: You're a person Ava: whether she wants that or not James: Jay can start boarding school in a year, I've already made that plan Ava: Is that what you want? James: it's what she needs Ava: Okay, so that's a start then James: I don't want to send her away but I don't want her to stay here Ava: Once you've sorted the rest, you can bring her back Ava: She's young, kids are so resilient James: It was so much easier when she was too young to understand what was being said or done Ava: Yeah Ava: I see that, with my family Ava: it's all okay until it needs to be explained Ava: because it can't be explained, or isn't James: exactly James: what words am I ever going to be able to find to make it okay? there aren't any Ava: Actions count Ava: and you love them Ava: that counts for so much James: will it count for enough? James: my actions certainly aren't good enough Ava: Almost definitely Ava: I can't say 100% but a good 99% James: you don't have to say anything James: I'm in my wet clothes today, that's all Ava: You don't have to excuse yourself, ever James: don't I? Ava: Not with me James: that wipes out well over half of my current vocabulary, just so you're aware James: it won't be an excuse that I'm speechless around you Ava: We'll work it out together Ava: I don't mind not talking for a while and just James: I'm going to be here until it's very late but if you can get away, I'll say I'm staying even later Ava: Yes Ava: I can make it happen Ava: People are here but I can get out James: me too then Ava: I don't care if it's five minutes Ava: well, I do Ava: but I'll take it James: I definitely do James: but it won't be James: the girls will be asleep before I'm done, I'm not rushing home for her Ava: Then rush to see me James: I promise James: I know you don't want me to, but I do Ava: As far as promises go Ava: that's a pretty good one Ava: they're like cliches James: I'll work through lunch for the possibility you'll be awake by the time I'm allowed to leave Ava: I can catnap if necessary James: oh, well now that's a mental picture I wish I had Ava: Sadly I can't take photos of myself sleeping Ava: and I don't think I can promise I'll waste any time with you napping Ava: 🤔 James: I'm so very conflicted James: what a dilemma James: but we'll be able to solve it when my dad decides I can be trusted on business trips Ava: 🤤🤤🤤 Ava: Please come through for me J I James: knowing him it'll take a while but I'll come through so he'll have no choice but to do the same Ava: All the faith Ava: and Monday when you come over you can have a preview of what to expect Ava: for motivation James: in order for you to keep it & for him to begin to harbour any, I should go James: but I feel very motivated at the thought, so thank you Ava: You've got this Ava: Later, love James: [let's skip then chicken, come at me drunkenly lol] Ava: You probably can't reply Ava: but I wish you were here James: [a dramatically long pause because imagine how extra weekends would be] James: but you're having fun? Ava: Hey ☺️ James: hi Ava: It's alright Ava: everyone's going a bit hard James: I'm sure your brother would happily throw them all out for you Ava: That may be Ava: but he is not invited James: that wouldn't stop him if he's still anything like I remember Ava: 2 kids and a wife might Ava: ha James: from being a protective older brother? I don't think so James: you either are or you're not Ava: yeah but my cousin is here Ava: so no need for the 'adult' supervision Ava: it's cool James: I'm happy to hear it James: there's no opportunity for me to drag Teddy home if he's there & he wouldn't thank me for it Ava: that's a bummer Ava: though I've already sacrificed him once tonight so rude of me James: to who? Ava: said cousin Ava: he isn't actually who I had in mind but you know Ava: be weird if I ❌ James: it sounds very romantic, I have no doubt he'll be thrilled Ava: Yeah it's like Paris in here tonight James: it's like Venice here, by which I mean flooded Ava: ??? James: 🛁 Ava: ahh Ava: awh Ava: 🐥🧼🧽💙 James: so yes, I'd say I wish you were here too, but I can't Ava: that's fair Ava: someone is in my bath alas James: theirs was meant to be hours ago so the chaos is somewhat relatable Ava: uh-oh Ava: I did think it was more like 💤🛌🌃 James: it's actually really far past that time too Ava: yeah Ava: you must be knackered James: if only I could join you in a drink Ava: There's still plenty 🍾🍾 Ava: I'll leave a full one out on the step Ava: for the milkman, like James: 😂 thank you, Ava Ava: my curtsy is so real James: that reminds me, I like your outfit Ava: 🥰 Ava: you're always nice Ava: are you wet? James: drenched, of course James: but actually not in the metaphorical sense Ava: Yay Ava: I'm happy James: are you smiling? Ava: cheeeeeese James: 📷 Ava: I'll take a real one for you Ava: but not right now James: [the longest pause ever like is he gone or what? but no he's just trying to sort the chaos out of course] James: later is an undeniably tempting prospect Ava: all dry Ava: what are you doing now Ava: a story James: well guessed James: would you like to pick it for us? Ava: You have to make one up Ava: a happy ending, naturally James: & there has to be a dog involved or Jay will be very angry indeed Ava: Frank! James: Oh right, I forgot you have one Ava: He's very angry indeed Ava: 😡 James: about the party? Ava: No Ava: about being forgotten Ava: he isn't actually here he's been dogknapped James: he'll forgive you Ava: me! James: yes Ava: you forgot him Ava: he's devastated James: you haven't taken enough selfies with him Ava: are you questioning my love James: I'm not but he could be, that's what I'm saying Ava: this is a sad story James: I'll do a re-write Ava: good idea Ava: he's on holiday James: working on his tan James: you two are very competitive about it Ava: well we've gotta be summer ready Ava: his diet is going awfully though James: he's lucky he doesn't need to go on one James: it was purely hypothetical Ava: he likes baked beans with the lil sausages in James: what do you like? I can't picture him happily sharing Ava: 🤔 Ava: that's a big question Ava: chinese food James: [when you know he's gonna send her some tomorrow for the hangover bye] James: can you use chopsticks? Ava: yes Ava: v dexterous Ava: shame that's not a sexy skill Ava: like cherry stems James: it could be James: you doing it Ava: 🥢 grab your tongue with that boy Ava: 🤭 James: it could work to shut me up James: but it's only making me laugh right now Ava: I like when you talk Ava: and laugh James: I used to be able to do that cherry stem party trick Ava: you'll have to show me Ava: we'll get some, see if you can do it James: It's been years, I probably can't Ava: you don't lose skills like that James: it's not a real skill, it's a boast Ava: yeah Ava: an implication of other skills, I know James: we all tried it out to mock the girls over how 'easy' it was but only a few of us could do it actually Ava: wink wink nudge nudge is how boys do Ava: 'course Ava: don't always have to back up a boast James: especially when it's one you made in another life Ava: nah Ava: i'll judge you and be so disappointed James: Ava! that's outrageous Ava: that's me James: you're supposed to not even be hypothetically disappointed by me Ava: I'm also not meant to lie to you James: okay, I'm backed into a corner, now what? Ava: what I would do to you if I had you in a dark corner right now is not suitable bedtime story-telling Ava: unless you wanna be up all night James: some stories demand to be told regardless James: & I wouldn't be upset about being kept up for as long as this one takes to be told Ava: You're the storyteller Ava: I'm a journalist, I like to report what happens James: [writes her a very sexy essay right here and right now about the life they should be living in the dark corner, like soz Jimothy you've been usurped as the writer & poet in residence] James: well then, you can tell me what's happening to you Ava: I don't know if I can describe that Ava: how you make me feel Ava: like you're here Ava: the only person here James: I think you've described it perfectly Ava: you are perfect James: no Ava: yes James: Ava Ava: James James: you're not meant to lie to me Ava: I'm not James: it's not true, it can't be Ava: opinion can't be wrong Ava: you can say i'm not well-informed if you wanna Ava: but i'll still think it James: I'm not at your party, I won't ever be able to be there Ava: you don't have to be at my party James: but you wish I was James: that's compromise, it can't be perfection Ava: only 'cos I'd rather be with you Ava: because you're so perfect James: if I don't give you what you want, I'm not perfect Ava: i want you Ava: as you Ava: i can miss you and i can wait Ava: i don't need anything else from you James: I don't know who I am Ava: i see who you are Ava: who you could be James: but I could become someone else James: like my dad wants James: like my wife wants Ava: you can't change who you are Ava: even when you try really hard James: you can lose who you are though James: & I have Ava: I'm telling you, I can see you Ava: even if you can't James: when you stop looking at me, it's going to be really hard Ava: I'll only stop if you tell me to Ava: no other reason James: if I tell you to it'll only be because I have to James: for your own sake Ava: you don't have to worry about me James: it's not the 1st time I've done this or had to stop doing it James: I know I have to worry about you Ava: i don't think i'm special Ava: but i know you like me too James: I think you're very special Ava: but i don't care if you can't be with me Ava: well, i do Ava: but i mean i'll be your friend no matter what Ava: you need me and no one can stop me Ava: not your wife or my brother or anyone James: the problem isn't who my wife is or who your brother is, the problem is that I don't care James: that's dangerous Ava: i said i wouldn't cause trouble Ava: and i won't let you get into any either Ava: not 'til you're ready to face it James: I've never met anyone like you before James: it's the most ridiculous cliche Ava: i know Ava: and I've never felt like this before Ava: so there we go two for two James: it's none of my business & you're under no obligation to answer me, but is that because you've not dated a lot of people before or in spite of everyone that you have dated? Ava: you're so cute Ava: I've dated plenty of people Ava: I liked a lot of them, some of them I thought I loved but then it was easy to be friends with them so I don't know, I think it was just that Ava: this is different, whatever it is and whatever they were James: understood Ava: did you date much James: I wasn't looking for that when I was in school & I'm not allowed to seek it out now James: I had a lot of sex before I got married & after but it's far from the same thing Ava: sure Ava: you weren't getting to know them as well as Ava: that's how lots of people operate James: I didn't intend to get to know you, Ava James: I don't know how it happened Ava: I'm not going to apologize for it James: please don't Ava: can i ask you something though James: of course Ava: did you just wanna sleep with me 'cos you thought i was cute or was it anything to do with who my brother is James: why would it be anything to do with him? Ava: i don't know Ava: 'cept i know him and i know there's history there James: I don't hold any grudges against him, we were all liars & fakes then James: all I cared about was my expensive drug habit & sleeping with as many girls as possible Ava: okay, i just had to ask Ava: things can be confusing enough without worrying about shit that ain't even real James: there's history for you too, it's not about any of that, is it? Ava: no Ava: it isn't James: my wife & your sister have so much history James: honestly more than me & her have Ava: i know Ava: but i'm not gonna exact revenge on her behalf via you James: I doubt she'd want that, she's not Chloé James: I don't believe there's anyone capable of holding onto something for as long & as tightly as she can Ava: I don't know Ava: I'm sure her therapist would tell her grudges are pointless but I don't reckon she can live that truth James: at least she has a therapist Ava: hooray for her James: I should probably get one, instead of talking to you like you are Ava: its what you should do Ava: talk to people Ava: work it out together Ava: nancy can't talk to anyone James: all my adult conversations are carefully overseen & orchestrated, it's only her laziness and the inescapable necessity of my parenting that has stopped the way I talk to my children from being put under the same restrictions James: what she did to Nancy was James: & that's only what I can remember Ava: its fucked James: it's already started with Jay James: if I can't find a way to stop it Ava: you have to James: I know Ava: you know its abuse don't you James: It doesn't matter what I know if nobody else knows it James: believes it Ava: how can they not, everyone knows what a total insane bitch she is Ava: sorry James: you don't need to apologise for telling the truth Ava: i'm not trying to make getting out sound easy though when it so clearly isn't James: it wouldn't be that hard for me to get out Ava: with the kids, or access to, though James: she says Jay's not mine whenever I criticise anything she says or does regarding her James: maybe she isn't James: her sex life was as active & varied as mine was Ava: wait Ava: what James: it's what she says if my bags are packed & nothing else has worked James: because I'd never see her again if she's not biologically my daughter James: but she can't say it about Matty, the dates line up too well Ava: are you on Jay's birth certificate? James: yes Ava: then you either are, and you have rights, or she knowingly lied on an official document but also, gave you full parental rights in the process Ava: if she really is lying then she has to incriminate herself and there's more than a case in your favour James: I don't know Ava: she got you to marry her under false pretenses, she stole years of your life James: it'll just be more of her bullshit James: of course she's my kid Ava: she'd do that? Ava: jesus James: she'll say & do anything to stop me from leaving James: in other circumstances it'd be flattering Ava: does she love you James: does it sound like love? Ava: no think she loves you then James: she thinks she's come this far James: not many of my friends would have agreed to marry her if they'd been put in the same situation James: if any, from the ones I had at the time Ava: i just wanna know what she gets from it Ava: she doesn't work or go to school, right? Ava: you seem to do most of the parenting James: isn't that the answer then? she gets a lifestyle that started out easy financially thanks to my parents & has been made easy by me in every other aspect James: I told you, it's my fault Ava: okay, granted but like she's happy to settle for not being crazy in love, just tolerating her kids and having no ambition of her own? at 22, 23? its not as if her parents would let her starve, Christ.. it'd be sad if she weren't evil and happy to take down you and the kids with her James: as I also told you, I've given up trying to figure her out Ava: sorry James: no, I am James: you don't need to worry about this Ava: yeah i do James: no James: you're a 17 year old at a party, Ava James: you shouldn't be worrying about anything Ava: don't patronize me James: that's not how I mean it James: I like you & she'll take you down too if you aren't careful James: I don't want that Ava: no she won't James: if you think that we shouldn't do this Ava: do what James: see each other as much as we are Ava: why not Ava: because i'm not duly afraid of chloe James: because you don't understand the risks Ava: again, don't patronize me James: do you want to end up like your sister? Ava: that won't happen James: it could happen James: & I'm not worth it Ava: it won't Ava: if you don't want to see me then that's your choice Ava: i think you're making a mistake but you're entitled James: I do want to see you James: I so badly want to Ava: then don't put a stop to us James: just please be careful Ava: I'm not afraid to like you James: Ava Ava: I'm just not, okay Ava: and even if i were, i couldn't stop myself and i won't so there James: you're really gonna age me horrifically, aren't you? James: 👴 Ava: well i do only like you 'cos you're older, obviously James: well, the back cover of the book can be all my worry lines Ava: 😂 Ava: sexy James: I can't make everything I do sexy like you do, darling Ava: don't joke i'm trying so hard to seduce you here 😏 James: I'm not joking James: you are & everything you do is Ava: Monday needs to be here now James: will you dance with me when it is, because we can't now Ava: only if you hold me really close and even tighter James: that I can do Ava: come on Ava: say you will James: of course I will Ava: James James: yes? Ava: I wish I could call you James: I'll go outside to smoke, wait a minute Ava: me too Ava: can't hear myself in here James: [another dramatic pause] James: okay Ava: the perks of being one of the only smokers Ava: and its warm out still Ava: i love summer James: it's a bad habit, but I've had worse James: & I still like winter the most somehow Ava: sorry it looks sexy and I've got a rep to maintain Ava: when were you born are you a winter baby James: January Ava: knew it Ava: awh its not your birthday for ages James: & you only like me because I'm older, I remember James: you must be truly devastated Ava: mhmm Ava: hurry up and hit 30 so we can really make it a moment James: you'll have me looking 30 soon enough James: all these smoke breaks Ava: not if you get to talking please and thank you James: you're supposed to be calling me James: as you wished it Ava: oh Ava: wanna facetime Ava: assuming 🥴 this is not my face James: you could still 'make a moment' I'm sure James: & I probably look better blurry Ava: shut up Ava: you're beautiful James: so you don't want to talk to me, you want to look at me? James: understood Ava: I wanna listen to you talk Ava: [ring him bitch] James: [telling her a story of everything he wants to do on Monday & it's hot & cute & funny & a mood] Ava: you're so so lovely Ava: stick around please James: you're quite drunk Ava: if I was drunk I'd say lots more James: you are so you can James: I'm listening Ava: no Ava: 🙈 James: you're not afraid of my scary wife but you're afraid of me? Ava: no Ava: but I'm scared of feeling crazy, being Ava: a little madness is key but James: I don't think genuinely crazy people are that self-aware typically Ava: maybe James: You're not crazy, Ava Ava: thank you Ava: probably not curtsy worthy but still James: you've devastated me, but I'll hide it expertly Ava: 😞 nooooooo James: I'll dedicate a suitable amount of book pages to it James: but otherwise, be utterly unaffected Ava: as long as that's the only conflict you're planning Ava: know it propels plot but I'll be very sad James: you'll get your happy ending, that means more to me Ava: you too James: that'll require a very long re-write Ava: maybe Ava: the middle can be shit though Ava: think that's writing 101 James: 😂 Ava: come on Ava: reluctant hero is a great trope James: I'm more of an anti-hero James: it's less about reluctance & more that I lack the necessity attributes, like courage or a trustworthy nature Ava: there's plenty different ways to be a hero Ava: there's plenty different ways to be heroes Ava: it isn't all capes and a misplaced sense of authority and vigilante justice James: I'm aware of that, but isn't the advice to write what you know? I'm hardly surrounded by viable examples James: you can't play every role, darling Ava: or write for the life you wanna have, the person you wanna be Ava: usually advice reserved for making you buy shit suits but I think it applies James: that explains why I've never heard it, in that case Ava: 😏 you were born in a tailored three-piece right James: if my parents were authoring the story, absolutely Ava: as much as parents love me Ava: probably not result in my happy ending James: or mine Ava: no Ava: we'll save that meet-cute James: thank you James: though it's unlikely I'll curtsy either Ava: shame James: I can add it to Monday's to-do list if your heart is set Ava: Your Monday sounds very busy as is Ava: I wanna help you relax and feel good not run yourself into the ground with curtsies etc James: you're sweet Ava: come taste me James: your party guests are bound to notice me Ava: I know Ava: I'd make them all leave if you could though Ava: but you can't James: no, I can't Ava: it's not long to wait Ava: just feels it James: it'll go faster for you, half of it spent in bed Ava: ha Ava: actually will have to entertain children too, worst of all my brother Ava: he's as annoying as he is protective etc and will definitely make me spend time with him before he leaves so we can have Monday James: it's a shame a playdate is out of the question Ava: even if I stole his Ava: can imagine your wife's joy to bump into us at the park James: she'll be far too busy shopping or having brunch with her friends Ava: then tell me it's still not feasible before I think it actually is James: it's a bad idea James: isn't it? Ava: it must be Ava: it's too good James: your brother wants to see you, he'd probably invite himself anyway, right? Ava: Probably Ava: but what if I show up really early and annoy him all day Ava: hype the kids up too James: 😈 Ava: there is one problem James: is there? Ava: my cousin will probably wanna come Ava: idk how I'm telling her no James: you said you'd already sacrificed my brother to her once James: how did that go? Ava: I've not been 👀 on 'em Ava: but I see 😈 what you're saying James: if get Jay to insist that he brings himself & a jumper for goalposts, he might Ava: oh Ava: no we can't James: you don't think it'll work? Ava: I told her some stuff Ava: not about you specifically Ava: but she can't meet you, obviously, she's not daft James: why would you do that, Ava? Ava: I didn't tell her anything James: that's obviously not true Ava: well she has no idea who you are James: you can't tell anyone about us James: I shouldn't even have to be saying that Ava: I haven't Ava: I told her about a boy Ava: I'm sorry but it's not going to affect anything Ava: she's not from here, she's not gonna say anything and she's got nothing to say anyway James: if you've told her enough that she could figure out who I am from seeing me at the park, you've told her too much Ava: I'm saying if your brother is there, it's just obvious Ava: I'm trying to be careful James: it doesn't matter, I'll see you Monday as previously arranged Ava: Well it does Ava: I'm sorry Ava: I'm just saying I don't think I can pretend you're just Teddy's brother, there's no point James: I agree Ava: I can tell her it fizzled out soon okay James: like you said, it won't affect anything Ava: you're still angry James: it's a frustrating situation Ava: yes James: I'm not angry at you James: I shouldn't have done this Ava: Be angry at me Ava: it was stupid but I'm not Ava: I won't tell anyone anything James: I know you're not, how smart you are is one of the 1st things I noticed James: but I obviously need to be smarter Ava: You don't want to do this James: I think we should slow down, you won't have to lie to your cousin & I won't get so carried away Ava: okay James: it's for the best Ava: alright, so what does that look like James: I don't know Ava: just let me know then James: I'll call you Ava: 👍 James: okay Ava: later then

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axemetaphor · 4 years

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@ the oc ask game thing do all of em for Adam. I Dare Ya

oh shit asdfghjk i already did 2 so i’ll exclude those, but, HERE WE GO

🌹 Where in the world does your OC feel most at home? Is there any reason why? If it’s not the place they were born, where were they born? Is there a certain somebody that makes them feel at home where ever they may be? What does home mean to them?

He doesn’t remember much of Scotland, but he likely has an idealized concept of it that he considers home. In his mind, if he lived in the rolling green hills he often hears described, everything would be fine! He’d finally be entirely at peace. But that’s not his home, and he knows it.

For him, home isn’t really a place. Technically he still considers his mom’s house “home” simply because he’s used to referring to it as such, but it doesn’t feel like home. What feels like home to him is being with Flint and Domino. What feels like home is the three of them working on a case together and bantering back-and-forth as they drive to and from wherever the hell they need to go. What feels like home is staying up ‘til absurdly late hours playing video games with Domino and Joey and sometimes Lotte. That’s home.

🍁 Where does your OC go when they need to have some time to themself? Would they ever have their own “comfort corner” filled with all the things they like? Do they have a favourite spot outside that feels like its theirs and theirs alone?

Hm that’s actually interestin to think about. He barely knows New York and his space in the apartment is the living room, so, he doesn’t have His Room or smth to go hide in... He strikes me as the sort to like stargazing/skygazing, though, so maybe the roof. If he needs to think about something or calm down, he might take a walk to clear his head. He’s prone to anxiety and walks really help with that, afaik!

🍂 Does your OC enjoy hugs? What do they do as a show of affection for: their friends, their family, their significant other(s) or for strangers? Over all what are they like with receiving affection from others?

Adam probably loves hugs, but is a bit skittish about them, mainly because he’s mindful of other people’s boundaries ! He doesn’t tend to easily trust kindness from strangers, or even from friends and family honestly, but he’d like hugs. He gives very nice hugs, he’s a very fluffy lad.

🌻 What little things do they notice about people or the world around them that make them happy? What tiny little treasures do they find in the normal every day that makes the world seem a little brighter for them?

He likes birds! And nature in general! He just likes living green things a lot. He likely notices plants and wildlife the most. That being said, everything about New York City is probably very new to him, so for a while he’d be dazzled by all the hustle-and-bustle. Especially the concept of “the city that never sleeps,” the eternal Something Is Happening Someplace.

As for people around him, he likely notices their neutral expression the most, and can probably pick up on what their mood is quite easily. If someone else is happy, he’s likely going to be happy, too! Unfortunately, this sort of a skill is likely a defense mechanism-

🌾 Describe your OC through the eyes of someone absolutely head-over-heels in love with them

this one was kinda tough lkjhgfd He’s a gentle dog with the prettiest unnervingly-bright-blue eyes around, and even when he hasn’t combed his mess of hair it manages to flop over his eyes in just the most adorable way. He handles everything with a certain level of delicacy that’s genuinely admirable. He’s always honest, even if it’d hurt him, fiercely loyal, and incredibly resourceful & hardy. He’s a little dumb but his heart’s in the right place, and he’s selfless to an almost dangerous degree.

💐 How does your OC handle being unwell or forced to rest in bed? Who cares for them and in what ways? Does your OC enjoy being doted on or are they a terrible patient? Reversed: is your OC good at taking care of others who are ill or in need?

Adam is extremely good at taking care of other people and probably not very good at being taken-care-of lolol... He isn’t a terrible patient, just not the greatest one. He won’t be downright awful because he’s too sweet but he doesn’t like being fussed-over and feels guilty. Domino and Flint are both equally likely to take care of him when he’s sick, but Flint would probably be a little bit better at it by virtue of being More Adult than either of them lmao. Domino would Try, though!

🌿 What way does your OC show that they care without using words? What way do others show your OC that they’re cared about without using speech?

He strikes me as the type to Gently Lean On Someone when he really trusts them. He’d be likely to hug Domino when they’re having a rough time. He’s the type to pay attention closely when he really cares about someone or something.

Flint is likely to just do nice stuff for both of his kids--he doesn’t seem to be the type to be good at being emotional via words, so he probably shows that he cares by just doing little nice things here and there. Domino is probably the same, though their main way of showing Adam they really do love and trust him is simply the fact they let him hug them lol. As for the other characters he interacts with ... I’m not sure!

🌳 What is your OC’s favourite way to relax after a stressful day? Do they have a favourite book to curl up with? A hobby? Or do they have a nice bubble bath and have an early night to bed?

He likes to play video games ! His favourite to relax is probably Minecraft. It’s chill and also Domino is terrible at it, so it’s really funny for him to watch them get lost and die a lot-

He does strike me as the type to maybe like a calming bath, though. Maybe he’d just chill in silence, or maybe he’s listen to some soft music.

🌲 How deeply does your OC feel? Are they typically empathetic or do they have a hard time connecting with others in this way? What are they like when offering support and comfort to someone they care for?

He’s a very empathetic doggo, but he has a tough time making it a two-way street. He doesn’t open up very easily, albeit less-obviously-so than Domino. He’s more likely to deflect others’ questions about his emotions and focus on the other person’s feelings more.

🌺 What does your OC do to calm down when they’re scared or after a nightmare? Do they have any special comfort items or need to be reassured by a specific person? How do they handle this if they’re alone?

When he wakes up after a nightmare, he usually hugs a pillow, or Domino if they’re awake. He just doesn’t want to be all alone again. Domino is the most-comforting person to him, with Flint maybe being second-place--or tied with Joey.

🌸 What are some of their favourite things and why? List as many as you can think of!

He loves video games, snack foods, gentle rainstorms, green hills and the outdoors in general, that light-in-the-chest happy feeling he gets when he’s Genuinely Praised, the smell of coffee in the early morning, waking up next to his family, road trips, peanut butter (though he has to be mindful of Flint’s allergies--), hugging Domino, the stars at night in a smog-free sky...

🌼 Who are this characters friends and found family? How did they meet, how long have they been friends for, could they ever be something more than just friends? What do they look for in a friend or a romantic partner?

Adam’s only biological relative is his sibling Domino! The two were adopted by Flint Paper, who Adam sees as a father figure. He considers Joey (owned by @archielemon) his big sister, as Domino and Joey already sorta.. mutually adopted each other as siblings lolol. By extension he might also see Kathy, Joey’s girlfriend (also owned by @archielemon) as a big-sister-in-law (technically--they’re not married, but, yknow). He also sees Lotte (owned by @keenflapcowboytaco) as a younger sister. Adam doesn’t have many friends yet, but he admires Sam a fair amount. Max, however, scares the shit out of him.

Adam doesn’t have any romantic interests at present, nor a canon sexuality, because his mother was so stifling he never got any sort of opportunity to figure himself out. He has no idea what he would want in a partner or if he would want one at all.

Questions for You!

💫What is your favourite fact about this character and why?

this is Another Really Hard question! I’d have to say ... my favourite fact is how he admires Sam but is scared of Max. Especially since Max just wants to be his friend kjhgfdsa. If Adam wants to talk to Sam he’s gotta brave talking to Max, too, poour guy--

☄️ Does this OC deserve better treatment from you? Do you make them suffer just a little bit too much? Be nice to them!

asdfghjkl all of my OCs suffer too much at my hands, i am Sorry, My Children,

🌠 On a scale of 1 - 10 how Baby is your OC? BONUS when asking this question rate the OC yourself as see if the reply matches up!!

100000/10 he is Pupy and he cannot change this. He is More Pupy than Domino is

💦 If you as the writer could erase one traumatic event from this OC’s life what would it be and why?

oh fuck LMAO there are. so many. hm. well. Even though it was better for Domino to leave, Adam really wishes they’d stuck around. If he had them there, maybe they could have left together, instead, and been stronger for it.

#long post #im so sorry this is so goddamned long ASDFGHJKL #i jsut ... went off!#adam dog #rambles.txt #not sonic #asks #canadaisnolonger

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chokefriends · 5 years

Text

Pit-town Strays Ch.1

Kidlaw softness and redneck shenanigans in a northern mining town. Everything's fucked but whatever.

Rated T, no warnings, or just general warnings for setting-specific social ills and violence (racist cops, shitty parents, etc). Someone ordered wholesome kidlaw family feels? well HERE.

[Ch. 1] - Ch. 2 - Ch. 3 - Ch. 4 - Ch. 5

Read on Ao3 too, I’m Ossicle

“What the hell are you going to Pit-town for?” Bellamy chewed at Law with his mouth open, a smarmy sneer on his pasty face.

“None of your business.” Law scowled, turning his eyes away from his brother’s ground-up breakfast. He shoved a random pile of coursework into his backpack.

“Well I know what kids like you go up there to do. Everybody knows.” Bellamy drawled on, like he knew shit about anything besides scamming beer and shooting bottles at the quarry.

“Don’t make assumptions, idiot. I’m just babysitting.”

“Why?”

“It’s called a job? You should try it,” Law suggested primly. “Feet.”

Bellamy lifted his feet off Law’s pile of textbooks. “Why, though? You got that big scholarship, I seen the letter when it came in.”

Law frowned at him. “How did you…”

“Well it was just there, so I read it. Why don’t you move out, if you got all that money? You hate it here so much.”

Law waved this matter aside. “I owe that money to someone. Give me the volvo keys.”

Bellamy didn’t move his stupid stumpy self from the ancient recliner—prized spot in the basement space the three brothers shared. “No, I need it, I’m meeting up with some guys later to go down to the quarry. Dad said I could.”

“Bellamy, I need it to get to town. Just gimme the keys.”

“Well I need it to pick up little ladies! You can hitch, right?”

Law didn’t bother arguing. He sighed through his nose and slid his feet into his severely ratty sneakers before heading out into the yard.

“Don't tell Dad where I am or I'll tell him about your girlfriend!” Law called on his way out.

“Obviously,” Bellamy muttered.

The ancient volvo wasn’t feeling cooperative today, or Law was having a lapse or something because he couldn’t fucking hotwire it. He slammed his fist on the dash and took out his phone. It was an oddly summery fall day—not too cold to walk or bike—but his shoes were getting thin in the soles, and Law didn't like asking his dad for little stuff like that. Didn't wanna be such a burden all the time.

He scrolled through his messages and sent a couple off to see about a ride. But Robin (who'd suggested the job) was teaching, and Baby (sweet, bitter Baby) was already in the sauce.

BB: i cn still come tho? you real stuck?? big bro awwwww im sry

You: Nono dont go driving if youre partying it up, Ill hitch a ride I guess

BB: Where?

You: Just into town

BB: Where in town??????

You: The Pit.

You: or whatever.

BB: LAWWW NOOOOOOOOooo jus kidding lol no judgement here

BB: id sell it on weekends too if i were pretty liek U

You: I’m not selling my ass!!!

BB: Lol

BB: sure

BB: why else ndn boi hangs w miner trash? Shady.

You: Lots of reasons, including a babysitting job. Don’t make assumptions.

BB: “babysitting”” “””job”””’

You: Yes.

BB: God ur sheltered

BB: shltered bebe in u nice rich house

BB: don get picked up there, pit-town piggies love ndn bebes

Law pocketed his phone with an eyeroll and started walking down toward the highway.

Once he’d found a ride and gotten dropped off, it was a twenty minute walk from the highway to the Pit. Law ended up climbing over the bare, rocky hill behind the truck stop, cuz his phone’s map had the place all wrong. On top of the hill, he could see the Pit in all its glory laid out before him.

Pit-town was the weird little enclave where the town’s mine workers were housed, in tar paper houses as outdated as the mine itself. The tangled machinery of the refinery loomed just beyond the houses, and above all that, the smokestacks. White smoke drifted from their peaks, as high above him as the clouds. Nothing except low bush berries grew around here—it was like an outpost on the moon.

Law went down into the village. Men with tattooed arms watched him from pickup trucks, and women smoking in lawn chairs whispered. Half-feral dogs barked and circled.

“Ya lost, hun?” one busty woman called from her front step as he passed, and her friends chuckled.

“No…” he mumbled back, and hurried on as they all laughed.

He was flustered and out of breath by the time he got to the address, on the other fucking side of the whole village. The house was like the rest: a single-storey bungalow on a small plot of land with a car port full of dead appliances. There was a little pink bike lying on the front step, and a short dog chain attached to a pole in the middle of the bare yard. A deep trail had been trod in a circle around the pole but there was no dog in sight. Law went up and knocked lightly.

He stood there for a few minutes, feeling the neighborhood eyes on his back, before trying again. He knocked a little louder. “Hey, um. Hello?”

A harsh voice called, “YEAH IT’S OPEN.”

Law tried the door. “No it’s not?” he called back.

“YEAH IT IS JUST KICK IT AND TURN THE THING AT THE SAME TIME.”

“...No, definitely not open,” Law assured him after trying every kick-turn combination.

“AH FUCK.”

“Yeah.”

“OKAY, CAN YOU JUST BREAK IN?”

“...What??” Law was almost offended.

“I’M DOING A THING, CAN’T GET THE DOOR RIGHT NOW, JUST TRY SOMETHING.”

Obviously Law could break into stuff, because his shitty little brothers thought it was hilarious to lock him out of the house all the time. And because their father thought it was prudent to keep things like Law’s ID in a secure location. Law didn’t think that skill set was a great way to start this ‘job’ thing, though… He looked around at the prying eyes across the street and they flitted back behind their blinds. He sighed.

The lock was just one of the doorknob ones, and the jamb didn’t have a guard on it so it was easy to get a credit card in there. The door swung open and Law stepped into a cluttered hallway.

“In here!” the big voice called from down the hall.

“I here!” a little voice added.

Law navigated his way carefully, stepping over baskets of laundry, unreturned empties, and sealed up moving boxes. Something obnoxious was playing on tinny speakers in another room. He rounded the corner into a sweltering little kitchen that seemed like the only clear spot in the house.

There was a very tall redhead with a face full of piercings sitting at the kitchen table in his boxers, and a much smaller redhead in a frilly blue bathing suit beside him. They were painting their toenails black, with their feet up on the table.

The bigger redhead seemed really shocked to see Law. He almost toppled backward on his chair. “H-hi! Uh! You’re Native.”

Law blinked. “Yeah. Um. You’re naked.”

“I’m Nami!” announced the little girl.

The guy was pretty much naked, by Law’s standards. Also kind of jacked… Law could feel his face heating up and was glad that it didn’t really show on him. The man sitting there in his boxers was pale as a fucking ghost, though, and so his sudden flush was super obvious. He rushed to recover from that intro.

“I don’t mean like, ‘oh, you’re Native.’ Well, obviously you are, heh, but I don’t mind or anything!"

“Yeah, uh.” Law nodded helpfully. “I don’t mind either, that you’re… naked.”

“Kidd is a naked...” Nami sang to herself.

“I'm not even,” Kidd protested. “I'm just hot as hell. Aren't you hot?”

“Am I??” Law was completely lost.

“Not—! I mean, yeah, but you're in a hoodie? Aren't you sweltering?” Kidd clarified.

“Oooh. No, not really. I like to keep covered up,” Law explained, picking at a fraying sleeve. He supposed it was weird to be wearing jeans and a hoodie in this weather, but no weirder than wearing Crocs in public, like people here seemed into doing.

Kidd was distracted by Nami painting patterns on her feet with the nail polish. “Fuck, Nami, stop, we just paint the nails. It’s messy, see? MESSY.” He took the tiny girl and sat her on the counter instead, then went about cleaning up the table. “Sorry about the door. Can’t go anywhere with wet toenails, it smears like hell.”

Law nodded harder and went to help him. “It’s cool, I know how to break into stuff. I mean I don’t usually! But your door was easy. Not that I’ll do it again!”

“Not a problem… uh, Kidd. I’m Kidd. Hi.” The guy finally got his head together and extended a hand. His fingernails were painted black too. He had a really firm grip.

“Law,” Law replied in relief.

“And this is my sister Nami,” Kidd jabbed a thumb at the toddler perched precariously on the counter. “She’s a fucking psychopath.”

Nami ignored them, sticking towels into the toaster instead.

“You have a dog too? I saw the chain outside.” Law wondered.

“No, Dad took the dog with him. And the fuckin car…”

“Your parents are both working?” Law asked, and immediately regretted it. God, he really was sheltered.

Kidd blushed again and started stacking dishes.

Law rushed to clarify. “Or, ‘parent'? I only got one too—a dad. I'm adopted though, and my birth parents are both passed, so.”

Kidd was wiping off each dish absently under the running water, not really cleaning anything. “We got a dad and mom, they’re just… not around right now. So it’s just us! Which is better, believe me.” He growled the last bit under his breath.

“Oh, got it.”

“Anyway. I didn't wanna ask someone to come all the way here to watch Nami, but that bitch down the street won’t take her anymore because of lice or property damage or something, and I got an interview today. I’ll prolly find another illegal daycare somewhere around here if I do get this job, though, heh.”

“Yeah don’t worry about it.” Law tried not to seem squeamish at the mention of lice.

“If they do take me I’ll be starting right away, so I might be out til pretty late,” Kidd warned him. “I’ll pay you for however long you’re here for though.”

“Sounds good. You gonna work at the mine?”

This seemed like another sensitive issue. Kidd looked away and muttered, “No… you gotta be 21, and take all these courses and stuff. And anyway, like HELL will I end up in the fuckin pit,” he finished with unexpected heat.

Law was saved from having to come up with a response by Nami blowing up the toaster outlet. The kitchen appliances all blinked out.

“FUCK! Again…” Kidd rushed to pick her up and sit her back on the table as a loud dryer beep sounded from the bathroom. “And fuck, there’s my pants. Listen, can you grab a fuse from the drawer there and stick it in? I actually REALLY gotta go, like right now.”

“Yeah of course!” Law watched the strange redhead duck through the kitchen door and pick his way down the obstacle course hall to another door.

He pulled his eyes away from the muscled back and onto the little girl, who was… eating nail polish.

“You!” Law scolded her, and put her in a chair. He grabbed the few towels that weren’t burnt, and tied her to the aluminum frame. “Okay, eat cheez-its while I fix this.”

Law had got the new fuse screwed into the panel and the nail polish off Nami’s face by the time Kidd came back, dressed in clothes that didn’t seem like interview clothes to Law: heavy duck pants and steel-toed boots. He grabbed a duffel bag that was sitting on a box stack, shouldered it and then stood looking at Law.

“Uh,” Kidd was blushing again. It was kind of amazing to see this tough blacklung brat acting so unsure. “If I come back really late maybe I could bring something? To eat? And we could eat it here?”

“Yeah, that'd be good.” Law shrugged like he didn't mind either way.

“KFC?” Kidd suggested.

“Oh I don't like breaded stuff. Fries are good, though.”

“Chinese?”

“I'm trying not to eat MSG actually…”

Kidd tried to think. “So what do you eat?”

“Mostly sushi.”

“I didn't know there was any sushi places in this shit town,” Kidd admitted.

“At the college there's one. Uh, but whatever you bring is fine, don't worry about it!” Law reassured him.

“Okay. Well, see ya.” Kidd made his way outside, yelling at some hovering dogs to git!, then started swearing. “Aw fuck, Nami's FUCKING bike…”

“You trip on it?” Law poked his head outside.

“No,” Kidd was looking at an empty front walk. “Fuckin kids took off with it again. I'll just go punch their dad in the throat later, not a big deal.”

“Holy,” Law commented mildly.

He watched Kidd pull a frankenstein-ian motorcycle out of a side door and roar away on it. Then he looked around to see if anyone had caught him looking. He was just sending a good glare at the prying eyes across the street when he remembered that he was babysitting. He returned to the kitchen where Nami was sitting once again on top of the table, drawing circles in a nail polish puddle with one finger.

“Your brother is an entire entrée,” Law informed her.

She didn't reply, intent on her craft. But she objected when he tried to pick her up. “Nooo!”

“No?” he put her down.

She glared at him, a tiny girl of no more than four, ginger hair in little pigtails and her frilly blue bathing suit spotted with nail polish.

“I'm Law,” he sat down so he was at her level, and introduced himself. “Lawww.”

“Law...” She appraised him solemnly for another moment and then seemed to deem him acceptable. “I’m being a witch,” she confided in a whisper.

“A witch?”

“Yah.”

Law sat back in the chair with a laugh. “My girl! Let's talk!”

Law had the kitchen scrubbed to his own exacting standards in short order, having secured Nami firmly to a chair (with duct tape and towels this time).

She was starting to nod into her cheezits by the time he'd finished, and Law figured it was nap time. He went to review the rooms along the hallway, looking for a baby room. He couldn't figure out the logic of the place, though. There was a largeish bedroom, which seemed to be the source of the stale smoke smell, mostly taken up by a tacky king bed and Seinfeld DVDs. It clearly hadn't been used in forever. He closed that door. Then there was a smaller room that might've once been a child's room, decorated with glow in the dark stars on the ceiling and complex Lego structures piled in one corner. It was stacked floor to ceiling with file boxes and covered in dust too. Another small room seemed to be Kidd's hideout, though the bed was just a box spring covered in laundry and books. There was a guitar and practice amp, and a desk piled with half-dissected old laptops. Law resisted the urge to snoop, and closed the door.

He went back down to the other end of the hall, past the front door, where the narrow corridor opened into a small living room space. A couch and a single mattress were neatly made up into beds, in front of a large TV that seemed like the only new thing in the house.

“I want a Kidd nap.” Nami had somehow gotten out of the duct tape high chair and was at Law's side, rubbing her eyes.

“Okay? In the big bed?”

“You're silly,” she accused. She went to lie down on the couch, pulling a fuzzy blanket over herself.

Law went to sit next to her. He gestured down at the mattress on the floor, with its orange and blue comforter and many fuzzy cushions. “Is that your bed? Don't you wanna nap there?”

“No,” she explained patiently, eyes already closed.

“Right, obviously.”

He watched her shuffle and sigh her way to sleep.

“I could've had a sister,” he murmured, partly to her and partly to himself. “I mean, I do have a biological sister, but I didn't grow up with her. I think it would've been nice, though…”

Nami was already asleep when he looked over again. Easy! Law totally had this babysitting thing in hand. He pulled his stats assignment out of his bag, and got down to the real work.

Nami turned out to be a pretty chill baby, as well as being an utter terror. She mostly ignored Law, preferring to go about her little play tasks uninterrupted, with the TV playing in the background. “Being a witch,” she explained whenever Law asked what she was doing.

“Keep it up,” he encouraged her, turning back to his own work.

He quickly learned, though, to keep an ear out for silence, because she was probably blowing shit up. Law found her building a fire in the oven, then making what he was pretty sure was mustard gas in the toilet.

“How’d you do that??” He took the bleach from her and she threw a mild fit before toddling off to the next game.

By the time Kidd returned, Law was just sitting in a kitchen chair with his stats assignment disregarded in front of him, watching the four-year-old expertly jimmy the makeshift lock he'd put on the knife drawer.

“More twist on the lever,” an amused Law recommended.

“So this one's being a psychopath huh,” Kidd entered and threw his duffel bag on the table.

Law corrected him.“Um, she's a witch and a prodigy? She made several deadly potions with cleaning supplies today."

“Oh jesus now there's two of you.”

“One more and we got a coven.”

“Great. Nami, it's like 11, why ain't your ass in bed?” Kidd growled at his sister, who ignored him.

“She went down for a couple hours, but kept getting up when she heard a car go by. And I couldn't get any pajamas on her,” Law reported.

“Yeah she won't take the bathing suit off unless I bribe her. She's big into being a ‘mermaid’ this month, on top of being a witch.”

Nami had gotten the knife drawer open and was feeling around in it with one chubby hand.

Kidd scooped her up. “No knives.”

“A knife!!!”

Law shook his head and smiled. Child after his own heart. “What's she want a knife for?”

“She's been trying to slash my tires lately, so probably that. It's usually pretty funny to watch, but yeah, not at bedtime. Eh, Nami?”

“I WAN A KNIFE! A KNIFE A KNIFE A—”

Nami stopped and stared at the chocolate coin Kidd was holding up. She grabbed it and wiggled out of his arms. They followed her to the living room where she was stashing her prize under the couch.

“Holy, she's got a hoard,” Law gave a low whistle at the cache of foil coins and random shiny things.

“Yeah I think she's more dragon than mermaid,” Kidd commented.

Nami lay down in her floor bed, where she could see the glittering pile.

“I got food, if you wanna…?” Kidd nodded back toward the kitchen.

“Is she good here?”

“Yeah she pretty much puts herself to sleep, just leave WrestleMania on for her. She likes the noise.”

They went back to the kitchen, and Kidd turned on a thing Law had thought was a smashed toaster oven reconstructed with safety pins, but which turned out to be a radio. Kidd gestured to a bag on the table, and Law unpacked it while the redhead fiddled with the receiver. It mostly seemed to be picking up country music and static.

“Can almost get that alt rock station with this thing,” he muttered, “probably just needs another coat hanger.”

“You went and got sushi??” Law pulled out several little plastic containers.

Kidd’s back was to him but Law could see his neck and ears going red. He kept fiddling with the dials. “Yeah, whatever.”

“From all the way at the college?”

“Yeah. Whatever.”

“...I think that radio is using you as an antenna,” Law observed, changing the topic.

Kidd snorted and let go of the screwdriver-dial, and the radio went to mostly static. “Faboo. Maybe it wants a piercing too.”

His face had returned to a normal color under all that metal, and he joined Law at the table. Law offered him the dragon roll and took the sashimi plate.

The chopsticks were an obstacle.

“Do you stab it?” Kidd glared at the sushi and the two little sticks.

“No, look at my hand: hold one like a pencil, and the other one loosely—”

“I stab it.”

“Don’t stab it, hey, you’ll ruin the integrity of the roll shape!”

“Hm,” Kidd chewed his mangled piece. “Tastes like salad.”

“Here.” Law scooted over a chair. He took the chopsticks out of Kidd’s fist and rearranged them. Kidd’s hands were large and rough to the touch, and the scent of sweat and gas clung to his clothes. The sudden impression of body heat and machinery smacked Law right in the back of the brain.

“I’m gonna say this is finger food,” Kidd decided.

“Yeah,” Law agreed automatically.

“Yeah, fuck this. Want a beer?”

Law hated beer. “Yeah. I mean, whatever.”

Law sat and nursed the beer with determination, trying to pay attention to Kidd's animated take on government surveillance vans and Nicolas Cage. His brain was getting fuzzy really fast, though. He was such a fuckin lightweight.

“He’s not an actual human person, is all I’m saying. You seen his face tryna do face stuff?” Kidd argued, crunching his second beer can and tossing it in the bin across the room. "Nother beer? Hey, you’re not even done that one.”

“Tastes like bread,” Law noted distractedly.

“I guess. You don’t like Bud?”

“I liked the first movie,” Law hiccuped.

Kidd laughed like a fucking hooligan, and Law had to laugh too. Normally loud laughs grated on Law's ears, but he decided he liked this one. It wasn't mocking or cold; just big.

Kidd shook his head with a final chuckle and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. “Me too. Sooo uh, what you studying at the college?”

“General science right now, thinking I'll go into the pre-med stream,” Law answered right away. “Or maybe something more research, less clinical… uh. Or you know, like. Whatever.”

Kidd actually seemed interested. “Yeah that sounds awesome. I always wanted to go into engineering, but pure research would be cool… You um. Doing some math, there?” He looked over at Law's assignment, abandoned on the table.

“Stats. The bane of my existence. Don't stare at it too long, it'll put the bleed on your brain.”

“...you're stuck, huh?” Kidd glanced over again.

“No.” Law sniffed. “I'm considering it from many angles.”

“Okay, man.”

“Oh, like you know anything about sample sizes and shit.”

Kidd shrugged, but the line in his forehead deepened. He cracked another tallboy.

Law gripped his own beer can in the uncomfortable silence that followed, and then downed the rest all at once.

“Nother,” he wiped his mouth and Kidd raised an eyebrow but passed him a fresh one.

“Git it in ya.”

“Mhm.” Law took a deep swig and almost fucking barfed. “Sooo… you make that bike yourself huh?”

“...yeah,” Kidd's face lost the put-out look and split into a grin. “Or whatever, I just added some stuff and changed other stuff… actually, it's…”

That got another good long ramble out of the redhead, full of startling laughter and crass parallels with female body parts. Law wondered idly if Kidd was actually familiar with any female body parts, or whether this was just how people in Pit-town talked.

“Hm?” Law sat up straight, realizing that Kidd had asked him something. His brain was definitely all swimmy now.

“Or I can give you a lift back now. It's a long way to the Rez.”

“I'm not from the Rez, I live down the highway. I can just hitch my way back, it's not a big deal." Law looked at his phone—after midnight.

Kidd was giving Law a look, like he wanted to say something about that, but then grunted and downed his beer instead. “Here, for today,” he said, taking an envelope out of his pocket and pushing a few folded bills into Law's hand.

“Thanks.”

“If you're free tomorrow I'll be working again at noon. And like I said, you can stay here tonight if the trip out is—”

“Oh!” Law felt his face heating up again. “No, I gotta get home. My dad's gonna kill me as it is. I'll come back tomorrow, though, okay?”

“Okay! Or, whatever, good.”

“Yeah.” Law stood and started stuffing things back into his backpack. “Okay see ya tomorrow.”

Kidd gave him a flippant salute and cracked another beer.

Pulling on his sneakers at the door, Law felt a little tug at his pant leg.

“Law, you are going to go?” Nami worried.

“Yup, gotta go home.”

“Law, you won't be here if you go,” she started snuffling.

Law picked her up and put her back in her bed. “I'll come back tomorrow. Okay?”

“No.” She hid under the blanket and kept snuffling.

He hesitated. “I have to go.”

“She’ll get over it in a minute,” Kidd told him from the doorway, leaning backlit against the frame with crossed arms. “It's better not to draw it out.”

Law looked at the little lump among the cushions and shrugged. He stood to go.

The redhead chewed at his tongue piercing and watched him. “Okay, I don't wanna be weird about this, but like. It's the Pit. And you're... You know?”

Law wasn't getting it. “I'm...?”

“C'mon, you stick out. And it's really late, and it's just past check day, and… it'd really just be faster if I gave you a ride.”

Oh, fucking chivalry or whatever.

“So I'll put my hood up,” Law dismissed this.

“It’s the Pit, though,” Kidd said again.

“... See you tomorrow.” Law left without drawing it out any further.

Law got halfway through the village before someone pulled up next to him, apparently to offer him further unwanted courtesies.

“Looking for a place to stay?” the man offered.

“Just heading home,” Law deflected.

This didn't seem to be the answer the guy wanted, and he followed Law in his pickup at very close range, until they got to the village limits and the end of the street lights. Law gripped his phone in his pocket. He heard the truck door slam just as he went to detour off the road between two houses.

Law tried not to back away as the guy advanced. “I'll call the police.”

“I am the police,” the man pointed to the badge on his belt.

"Shit..."

"And you're trespassing."

Law held onto his phone, a harsh roaring steadily growing in his ears. The smart thing would be to play dumb and helpless so he wouldn't fucking get shot, and just hope someone came by… but the man went to grab him and he panicked just as the roar peaked. Law snapped the fist holding his phone into the man's temple, and it made a loud crunch. A couple more frantic strikes sent the pig down in a confused pile of limbs.

Well he'd fucking done it now. Maybe he could run before—

“Oohhh shit, haha,” someone commented.

Law glared over at Kidd, who was sitting there on his noisy rat bike, peering at the man on the ground.

“Hi?” Law crossed his arms.

Kidd scratched his neck. “Saw him drive past after you left, and figured… yeah. I was just gonna come and like, bam! Do a drive-by with a crowbar. But that Rocky shit was actually way cooler, haha. Is that a brass knuckles phone ring?”

“Yeah.”

“Yeah…” Kidd considered the lump on the ground. “Kay, well. Can I drive you home now?”

“...” Law really, stubbornly wanted to refuse.

“Just so you can see how Marlene here rides,” Kidd patted the motorcycle. “Did I tell you I built her?”

Law's tension cracked and an incredulous laugh bubbled out. “Yeah. You told me. She's a beauty.” Kidd passed him the helmet and Law slid into place behind him.

“She’s a rubber-tit, chain-smoking old blacklung biddy, fuck yeah she's a beauty. You can ride her all day and night, she don't get tired.”

Law had been wondering how he'd get all the way home like this without popping a boner, but that mental image cleared it up.

“Uh,” Law gave the unconscious cop a guilty glance, “should we get this guy somewhere…?”

“Oh, I'll just call his wife to come get him, I guess,” Kidd snorted at the pathetic pile and took out his phone.

“You know him?”

“Everyone knows everyone here… hold on a sec. Hey, Mrs. Kyle? Yeah I just seen Kevin going off tryna fight that goose again.”

“Fuckin what??” Law snickered.

“Yeah, Cobb Road. Looked like he'd taken a good one on the head already. I dunno who taught that thing to make a fist. Yeah, anyway. Yeah, bye.” Kidd hung up, nodding to himself like that was it.

“No one's gonna believe that shit,” Law objected.

“Oh the goose? That's real, the thing's a monster. I think they should just shoot it but there's a pool on who'll defeat it in hand-to-hand combat.”

“...okay. Sure.”

“It's the Pit,” Kidd explained again.

Kidd tied a bandana onto his face as a windguard, and they pulled out of the village and onto the highway. It was fall but the air was warm and smelled like tar. Law held onto Kidd's waist and directed him by patting his arm and pointing. The smokestacks receded behind them, though the tar smell lingered on through the treeless landscape. Eventually Law signaled for them to stop.

Kidd pulled off the highway and stopped just under the lone streetlight at the turnoff. He looked around. “This is just a carpool lot. I might as well take you all the way home, right?”

“Nah, my Dad's already gonna be pissed that I'm out this late. If I ride up on a bike smelling like booze… yeah.” Law passed him the helmet and dismounted. “It's not far from here, I'm good now.”

Kidd was still processing the first part. “Aren't you in uni? You still have a curfew?”

Law shrugged. “He's strict. He just worries. Though, yeah, he's nowhere near as protective about my fuckin brothers so—”

At that exact moment Law's brain registered the whine of a familiar car, and he had to grip his bag to keep from bolting. He relaxed slightly when he saw it was just the Volvo.

“Hey Lawnboy,” Bellamy chuckled, leaning an elbow out the window.

“Hiii Law,” a gawky, sharp-eyed girl chirped from the passenger seat.

“Monet, my dream girl,” Law flirted mildly, leaning on the door frame. Monet giggled and Bellamy scowled.

“That your ~boyfriend~?” the blond troll mocked, jabbing a thumb at Kidd, who tensed and sneered.

“Yeah,” Law shot back.

There was a pause.

“Really???” Monet scrambled to get a good look at them both. Bellamy's face went slack with shock.

Kidd stuffed his head into the safety of his helmet.

“What're you doing?” Law questioned the helmeted Kidd.

“He's shy!” Monet squealed. “Ahhhh you guys are perfect!”

“Are you blushing?” Law tried to flip up the mirrored visor and Kidd held on stubbornly, shaking his head.

“Law, bring him to Hawk's place with us, I'll make youse guys’ drinks!! I got sourpuss and peach schnapps!”

“They're not coming to Hawk's,” Bellamy told her sullenly.

“Shut up Bellamy. Law, you guys coming?”

Law demurred. “Gotta work tomorrow, Monet-fique. Nother time.”

“Aw.”

“See you at home, Bellyache,” Law dismissed his pouting brother, who scowled.

“‘Babysitting’, huh. I'm telling Dad you're hoeing it up in the Pit,” Bellamy threatened.

Monet punched him in the shoulder. “Oh my god Bellamy no you're not. Later, Law! Byyye, strong silent boyfriend!”

Bellamy took his cue and screeched away.

Law turned back to Kidd, who was still hiding under his helmet. “Sorry. That was my brother. It just seemed like the best way to get him to leave.”

Kidd gave a slight shrug.

“So. See you tomorrow?” Law shouldered his bag.

Kidd nodded.

“Thanks for the ride. And for dinner and stuff…”

“Yeah it's whatever,” came Kidd's muffled voice.

“Oh yeah I mean, whatever.” Law started off down the road.

“Uh…! Thank you too, for… coming...” Kidd called after him a few steps later.

Law stopped and looked back awkwardly.

“...And for being chill about Nami's issues, and the house, and dealing with that creeping fucker… You don't have to come back after that crap. And if all this is gonna get you in trouble with your dad anyway,” Kidd offered in a nervous jumble, as Law wandered back over and stood there, feeling suddenly sad.

Law had had his share of sweet goodbye kisses under this streetlight, when he'd been a little younger and a little less worried about everything. He kinda really wanted another like that right now… But Kidd was holding onto the helmet on his head like a life preserver. And a kiss seemed like such a shallow, wrong-headed kind of assurance to offer against all ‘that crap.’

Law leaned in, and bonked his forehead lightly against the glossy helmet instead.

“Well, pick me up tomorrow, at the highway. So I don't gotta risk crossing the goose,” Law shrugged too, like it really was all just whatever.

He couldn't see Kidd's face but he could see his heaviness lift.

“You got it, Cap.”

The scruffy redhead leaned into his bike and the road, and became a fading engine roar in the dark. Law walked home slowly.

#kidlaw #KidLaw fic #eustass kid #trafalgar law #one piece modern au #Kid is a blusher #Law is an airhead #blue collar love #pit-town strays

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botanistlester · 6 years

Text

Sweet Pea (33/34)

Summary: A nickname that goes bitter in your mouth. Cries for help that no one listens to. Gentle hands that make you quake on the ground you’re standing on. When Phil first met Nico, he thought he was a gift from the heavens. But behind the mask lies something daunting, something unnerving, that Phil never foresaw. Through his journey, he finds solace in Dan, the regular at his workplace, who seems to be the only one who sees through Nico’s mask to the darkness underneath. Warnings: Abusive relationship, violence A/N: Holy crappu! Chapter 33! Only one more chapter left and then this fic will be finished! I literally am in shock right now honestly. I'll save all the gushy stuff for the next chapter, but i'm still in shock lol. The final chapter is more like an epilogue so it may be out before Saturday since I already have half of it written! So keep your eye out for that! Sorry this chapter is late, i had a lot going on these couple of weeks and then like three hours ago I was almost finished with this but my roommate asked if I wanted to watch The Killing of a Sacred Deer (it's a movie i promise) and i was like. Um yeah who do you take me for OF COURSE! So here we are, three hours into sunday, and I'm an ass! Thank you all for reading this and for your lovely comments! The song at the beginning is from Somebody That I Used to Know by Gotye

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Chapter Thirty-Three

Now and then I think of when we were together. Like when you said you felt so happy you could die. Told myself that you were right for me, but felt so lonely in your company. But that was love and it's an ache I still remember.

University starts before Phil is truly ready for it.

One moment, he feels like he’s just minding his own business working and lazing around the house, and the next he’s scrambling to do last minute school shopping (i.e., buy a pack of pencils and that’s it). It hits him hard, but his friends are there for him and he even shares his creative nonfiction class with Charlie, so he can’t be too terribly mad.

The first couple of weeks go by rather slowly. His professors are all nice, and Phil had gotten a doctor’s note from his psychologist saying that he may have to miss school sometimes due to an ‘underlying mental illness’, which really just meant his post-traumatic stress disorder that occasionally flared up here and there. While it had gotten better, he wasn’t completely healed yet. Apparently that shit either took years to go away, or even never went away. But Phil was optimistic and every time he could smell Nico’s old cologne or watch Nico’s favourite show without going into freakout mode was a win for him.

Things got stressful fast though, sadly, which is true for all of university. One moment, he was just minding his own business, scrolling through tumblr at odd hours of the day, eating snacks, and the next he was scrambling to finish a ten page paper about why sex education in school is important while completely forgetting to eat as he rushed to finish. Dan was practically shoving food down his throat during it all, berating him for not starting the paper earlier.

What a hypocrite, honestly. Phil had seen Dan rush to finish a paper multiple times because his depression had gotten in the way of doing it earlier. At the least, he should at least understand when Phil did it too.

But then again, maybe he did understand. Maybe he was shoving food down Phil’s throat and promising him a bubble bath after he finished because he knew exactly what Phil was dealing with emotionally, knew how hard it was to complete things on time when the world was pressing on your chest in a way that made it hard to breathe.

After a while, his brain had had enough of the strain and decided to give up after five pages, spewing out a load of bullshit that didn’t make sense in the slightest. Phil buried his face into his palms, his eyes tearing up, and pressed his fingers against his eyelids to keep the wetness from leaking onto his cheeks. It didn’t really help too much other than to make his eyes hurt with the pressure.

“Why don’t you take a break?” Dan asked softly, draping a soft blanket around Phil’s shoulders. He kissed the side of Phil’s head, nuzzling his nose into his hair. “Email your professor and see if she’ll let you turn it in a day late.”

Phil laughed humourlessly, wetly. He didn’t think it was that easy. Plus, wouldn’t that just make him look bad by asking for special treatment? “And let my professor know that I was slacking on this assignment? I’d rather die.”

Dan hummed and pulled Phil’s laptop off of his lap, ignoring the small protests that came out of Phil’s mouth when he did so. Without asking, he replaced the laptop with himself, plopping on Phil’s lap like he was a dog. He poked Phil’s nose. “Mental health isn’t being lazy or slacking, my dear boy. It’s an actual disorder of the brain that renders you incapable during periods of time where you would otherwise be okay. Sometimes you can be in a bad place for weeks, and there’s nothing wrong with that. Your professors already know that there’s something going on with you. Asking for an extra day to complete the assignment is just you trying to be responsible and practicing self care. If you don’t finish tonight, then you’ll look like you don’t care about it at all and you’ll get points taken off of your assignment. Which would you prefer?”

In the end, Phil emailed his professor. Although he did do it with a lot of whining and grumbling, just to make Dan mad. (It doesn’t matter that Dan doesn’t get mad at him anyways, no matter how hard Phil tried. He was always way too understanding, damn it).

After only five minutes of refreshing his gmail anxiously, Dr. Lucifer replied with a chill, ‘Don’t worry about it, I’ll give you until Wednesday to complete it. Feel better Philip!’ There was even a smiley face at the end, so out of place after Phil had carefully constructed his email, made sure there were no typos, practically typing out a double spaced, 12 point Times New Roman persuasive paper about why he needed an extra day to complete. And then here was his professor, signing off with a fucking smiley face.

“Was that so hard?” Dan asked softly, brushing a hand through Phil’s hair.

Phil pouted and, because he was a jerk, pushed Dan off his lap light enough that Dan wouldn’t get hurt and could catch himself when he fell. “Shut your mouth, Howell, you owe me a bubble bath.”

Phil did end up getting his bubble bath, complete with a robot bubble bar from Lush, candles around the tub, and his favourite anime playing on his laptop that was set on the toilet so he could see. However, he also got an armful of Dan, which was something pure and good.

When Dan joined the bath, it didn’t matter that they were both too giants trying to fit into one tub. It didn’t matter that Phil’s legs started to go numb after a while or that they had to get out quicker because they got too hot too fast. All that mattered was that they were spending time together, with Phil’s arms around Dan’s waist, gently running his nails over Dan’s stomach because he knew that Dan liked it when he did that.

Most of the time, Phil liked to be held by Dan simply because it made him feel safe and warm and loved. But today, Phil wanted to be able to hold somebody. Holding something against his chest made him feel like his heart was full, like there was someone who needed him and who he needed in return. It was so relaxing, in his opinion, especially when that person was Dan, who he could press kisses all over his shoulders and neck. Who’s hair he could mess with, twirling a curls around his finger and pretending like his fingers were curling irons.

It was nice. It got Phil’s schoolwork off of his mind, that’s for sure. And when Dan turned around, capturing Phil’s lips in his, asking if he wanted a ‘good job blowjob’, Phil definitely didn’t have any complaints.

Phil had a break in between his Poetry and his Creative Nonfiction class where he liked to go to the different dining halls to grab some food. Depending on the day, Phil would meet up with either Louise, Dan, or both, and they would have a meal together, talking about how their classes were going, or how life in general was going. Phil really liked Louise and he was glad that they were getting to know each other better, thanks to Dan.

Plus, seeing Louise and Dan together reminded Phil of how he and Chandler used to be. They had their own inside jokes and would sometimes just break into laughter as soon as they made eye contact for no apparent reason. Louise made fun of Dan with no shame and Dan laughed so loudly that his voice would go all high pitched and squeaky.

Whereas most people may feel like they were a third wheel after something like this, Phil didn’t feel that way at all. It was nice on days where Phil didn’t feel up to talking too much, and it was nice on the days when Phil wanted to join in and create his own inside jokes with them. Watching the two of them together was a gift in itself, because Phil liked to watch how Dan interacted with people who weren’t, well, him.

When Dan wasn’t talking to Phil, his voice was louder and more brash, more obnoxious. He was more sarcastic, kind of mean, but only in a joking way. He liked to tell people to fuck off, liked to tell them that they were twats. He cussed a lot and was a dramatic piece of shit that was so painfully obviously studying something in theatre.

With Phil, Dan was all smiles and soft voices and warmth. Sometimes he would get all competitive and act like he was the most important drama queen on the planet, but then other times he would be all cuddles and kisses and compliments. Phil would love to tell the whole world about Dan’s big praise kink whenever Dan was in his boasting mood with Louise, but he didn’t. When he smiled at Phil, he made these doe-eyes that really made him look in love, tone quiet when he teased.

In short, Dan was a lot gayer with just Phil around.

Today was just one of those days where Phil didn’t really feel like talking. Dan understood this and didn’t press him for answers, knowing by now that Phil sometimes just needed time to be quiet and think about life. Everyone had those days, and Phil was having a day like that now.

Dan was holding his hand on the table, and Phil was grateful once again that they had opposite dominant hands, that way they could hold hands while still eating. Phil was eating a taco bowl made with spicy shrimp and Dan had gotten a sub sandwich with a taro bubble tea. Despite Dan’s efforts to make Phil try the drink, Phil refused, saying that he was afraid it would taste like a potato.

Louise and Dan were in a dispute about which bubble tea flavour was the best. Louise was stuck on mango while Dan said that the milk tea and taro were definitely the best. Phil just smiled and sat back, sipping on his own earl grey bubble tea. He liked it, but it wasn’t the best he’d ever tasted at all. He just hadn’t been in the mood for anything particularly fruity, so this was the most logical answer.

“How’s your tea, Phil?” Louise asked, drawing Dan’s attention towards Phil as well.

Phil shrugged and sipped at it again. “Spicy. Wait, no that’s not what I-” he was cut off by the sound of Dan trying to hold in a laugh, but failing miserably as it came out with a snort. He made eye contact with Louise, whose eyes were watering from trying not to laugh, and then they all burst into laughter. The table was practically vibrating with their noise, and Phil’s throat hurt from cackling so hard.

When Louise could finally get in a breath, she wheezed out, “Phil, that is the whitest thing I have ever heard you say.”

“I forgot what the word for herbal was!” Phil whined, which only made Dan laugh harder.

“Earl grey isn’t even an herbal tea, Phil!”

Phil pouted and crossed his arms over his chest. “Your mum isn’t even an herbal tea.”

Louise shook her head, taking a few deep breaths to try and calm down. Her makeup was a bit watery and messed up now, but it didn’t look bad. If anything, it was just endearing. “I can’t believe we’re still using your mum jokes.”

“I can’t believe you’re my friend,” Phil shot back, shaking his head in disappointment at himself. In all honesty, he was really grateful for both Louise and Dan, and they both knew that. Without them, Phil would probably just be sat in his apartment with no friends and sad piano music playing in the background.

The epitome of depression.

Just then, Phil glanced around the dining hall that they were in and his eyes came to a stop on someone who looked slightly familiar. It took him a moment to realise why they looked familiar, because this person had curly brown hair with blonde highlights, and Phil didn’t know anybody with blonde highlights.

But apparently he did now, because Nico was standing across the dining hall, in line at the bubble tea shop. As opposed to the other times Phil had seen him, this time he was completely alone and staring right at Phil with a hard frown on his lips.

From where he was sitting, Phil couldn’t see the freckle constellations on his face. He couldn’t see the colour of his eyes or how they shined emerald in the light. He couldn’t see the lines between his eyebrows or each individual strand of hair. He couldn’t smell his cologne or hear his voice.

And yet, Phil could hear his voice. He could smell his cologne. He could see the fucking freckles on his face and the glitter of emerald in his eyes and the lines between his eyebrows and each individual strand of hair. If somebody had asked him if he could draw constellations connecting each freckle together with only a pen and a piece of paper and no map, then Phil would be able to do it perfectly. Because even a year later, the memory of Nico was still burned into his head so intensely that he still couldn’t forget all of the tiny details that made up the man.

Dan squeezed Phil’s hand but Phil was so focused on the matter at hand that he hardly noticed. He could feel panic build up in him, making his skin pale and shaky. He felt nauseous, but it wasn’t as overwhelming as it had been whenever Phil had seen Nico before. This time, it was just a smooth thrumming in his bones, vibrating him, making him feel like his skeleton was trying to shed off his own skin.

He hated that he was doing this in front of Louise, hated that he was showing weakness once again in a public setting. Every time he thought that he was doing well, that maybe for once he was taking his PTSD by the balls and throwing it against the wall for good, it seemed to be thrown back in his face in one way or another.

“Phil.”

Nico didn’t look away and Phil couldn’t bring himself to either. They were frozen, thinking about a time when they were together, when Phil had put Nico first no matter what it did to his own mental health. Back when Nico’s opinion meant more than his own, when he had done everything to keep Nico and had gotten nothing in return but harsh words and a cold shoulder. Now being with Dan, Phil doesn’t know how he’d been with Nico for so long when he had constantly felt like shit. But he also knew that it wasn’t that simple. He’d been trapped by the sick idea that that was what love was supposed to be like, thanks to all of those sick love stories that made him believe that love meant sacrificing parts of yourself for your partner even if it makes you sad.

“Phil. Phil, hey.”

Dan’s hands were on both of Phil’s cheeks then, turning his head to face him. His hands were cold against Phil’s hot cheeks, but his eyes were warm like tea. His eyebrows were crinkled with concern, his thumbs rubbing over Phil’s cheekbones to try to bring him back to the present.

When he finally got Phil’s eyes on him, Dan smiled softly and bumped their foreheads together, nuzzling his nose against Phil’s. “Hey,” he murmured quietly.

Phil tried to smile but he only succeeded in his lips twitching up slightly, eyebrows furrowed like he was worried about something. Face pale like he had seen a ghost. “Hi,” he whispered, voice shaking slightly.

Ignoring Louise’s presence completely, Dan pressed a kiss to Phil’s nose. Feather light but full of feeling. Full of care. A small I’m here for you. Phil glanced out of the corner of his eye, back over towards Nico. He saw the way Nico was gritting his teeth, clenching his fists. Saw the way Nico muttered under his breath and then turned away, getting out of line and walking out of the dining hall.

“Hey,” Dan said again. “Look at me. Are you looking at me?” He pulled away and pressed kisses against Phil’s forehead, his cheeks, the corner of his lips. Phil was looking at him now. He was always looking at Dan. “Good. Keep your eyes on me. I’m here, okay? Everything is going so well, you’re doing so well. I’m so proud of you, you know? You’ve gotten so far and you’re doing things for yourself and even if you trip and stumble sometimes, you don’t let it stop you. You keep going no matter how hard it is. You’re so strong, Phil. You always have been.”

Phil closed his eyes, let Dan’s words wash over him. With Nico out of the room, he was starting to calm down, but it was hard to completely grasp the present enough to get himself out of the past. It was almost as though he had hands grabbing at his legs, trying to pull him under until he was gasping for breath, completely submerged in memory that he didn’t quite want to remember.

Slowly, Dan started to pull him out, whispering to Phil how he inspired him every day to be a better person, how Phil had gone through hell and yet had gotten out despite not believing in himself. When he ran out of things to say, he started talking about what was going on in their lives at the moment, how Phil had gone back to school and was doing so many things with his life now.

When Phil’s breath audibly stabilized, Dan kissed him lightly on the lips and pulled back slightly, looking at him with that calm smile on his face again. Phil’s eyes fluttered open and he stared into the warm brown, his heartbeat starting to calm. Dan grinned. “Better?”

Phil nodded and managed to smile back, albeit a bit shakily still. “A bit,” he rasped out. “I mostly just feel tired now.”

“Do you need to go back to the flat and skip out on Creative Nonfiction for today?”

This time, Phil shook his head. “No, I should go,” he sighed out, bumping his forehead to Dan’s and putting his hand on his knee, squeezing it lightly. “My writing journal is due today and I don’t want to deal with asking another professor for another extension. Better to just get it over with.”

Dan was beaming at him and he looked so full of sunlight that Phil was afraid he might burst. Phil gave him a quizzical stare, and if Dan was a dog with a tail, he would be wagging it right then. “You didn’t freak out that bad!” Dan exclaimed as reasoning for being so excited. Phil pursed his lips as Dan continued. “You didn’t pass out, you didn’t start crying or have to leave. Fuck, you’re even going to class afterwards. That’s amazing, Phil!”

Phil was absolutely floored. He didn’t really think about it like that. All he had been thinking was that it was ridiculous that he was still dwelling in the past, that he was still panicking. Because he did panic, he did get anxious and upset. But this time, he had actually been able to get a hold of his emotions without something drastically changing. “I…” he started, and then laughed awkwardly, shaking his head in amazement. “Yeah, you’re right.”

While there was still anxiety inside of him, Phil hadn’t had a full blown panic attack. And it was while Nico was in the room. Every time Phil had imagined seeing Nico again, it had never turned out well. He had always thought he would freak out or pass out or all of the above. But this time, he didn’t do any of those things.

“We need to celebrate,” Dan joked, and it was then that he seemed to realise that Louise was still there. Poor Louise, who was just eating her food and scrolling through her phone without paying them any mind. She was so obviously trying to give them space, but her ears perked when Dan started to speak to her. “Louise, do you wanna buy Phil an ice cream?”

Phil laughed in shock, shoving at Dan. He shook his head in disbelief. “You can’t just ask people if they’ll buy things for me, Dan!” he scolded his boyfriend, giving him what was supposed to be a harsh look.

Louise jumped at the chance to be a part of the situation though, because she was reaching across the table and grabbing Phil’s hand in both of her own. With the most serious expression on her face that Phil had ever seen, she said, “I will buy you every goddamn ice cream in the world if that’s what you want.”

They stared at each other. Phil with his mouth hanging open and Louise with an unreadable expression. The longer they stared, the more laughter built up inside of Phil at the absurdity of the situation, and then they were both giggling. Louise squeezed his hand. “Seriously, Phil. I’m buying you ice cream whether you like it or not.”

“Fine,” Phil huffed. “Let’s have a full blown party in that case. I expect strippers.”

“Can’t forget the strippers. They’re essential,” Dan said.

Louise nodded and pulled out a mini notebook from her purse, jotting something down inside of it with a pink pen. “Got it. Ice cream and strippers. I’ll throw Phil the best gosh darn anti-panic-attack party there ever was and you better be there. Or else.”

Phil didn’t know what the or else meant, but he knew that he was going to be there for sure, surrounded by people who he loved and cared about, and who felt the same for him. Because this was the kind of thing that people should throw parties for apparently, and he was just going to have to accept that.

Accepting it wasn’t very hard, after all.

Chapter Thirty-Four

#phan #phanfic #phanfiction #botanistfics #botanistlester #phanfictioncatalogue #fanfic #fanficiton #phan fanfic #dan and phil #gay #sweet pea #phan chaptered #phan angst #phan happy ending #writing #sp

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mrs-entwistle · 7 years

Note

1-104

YOOOOOO OMG you and an anon both asked me to answer all of these so thank you both!!! 😂✨

1. You woke up naked next to the last person you texted, what would you say? Considering the last person I texted is my bf, I would just be the happiest camper and greet him good morning and kiss him. 😘

2. What’s going on between you and the last person you kissed?We’re dating. 💕

3. If your boyfriend or girlfriend was into drugs, would you care?Oh yeah, of course. I get really concerned about stuff like that.

4. Is your last name longer than six letters?Nope!

5. Was your last kiss drunk or sober?Sober.

6. Have you ever wanted to have someone but you messed it up?Oh yeah, so many times.

7. What does your last received text say?It’s kinda long; it’s from Stephen and parts of it have to do with how nice he thinks it is to be out in nature, how he wants to be a singer but he thinks he’s no good at it, and there’s also some, uh……some other personal stuff that I’m gonna exclude for privacy purposes, lmao. 😅🙈

8. How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed?A lot, lmao.

9. Where was your last kiss at?In my bed. 😎😎😎

10. When is the last time you saw your sister?I do not have a sister, so never.

11. What do you drink in the morning?Water.

12. Where did you sleep last night?In my own bed.

13. Do you think relationships are hard?They can be at times- I don’t think anything is technically “easy” in life, though, y'know?

14. If you could go back and change something in the past 5 months, would you?Yes. Quite a few things. Don’t wanna elaborate on all that though.

15. You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, any problems?No way, that’s an ideal situation lmao 😂🙈

16. Would you rather it be sunny or rainy?Rainy!!! 🌧❤️

17. Do you know anyone with the same middle name as you?I do not, no. :o

18. Are you wearing jeans, sweatpants, or pajama pants?I am currently actually wearing no pants… 😅😂

19. Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 years from now?Who can say? Ya never know what will happen in life.

20. Does anyone like you?Yes indeed.

21. Have you ever kissed someone with a name that starts with an S?Lmao, yes- the only two people I’ve ever kissed in my life both have names that start with an S. 😅

22. Is the last person you kissed gay?Noooo, haha.

23. Is there a person you CANNOT stand?Oh yes, there are a couple.

24. Have you ever considered getting a tattoo?Yeah! Nothing too big, though.

25. In the past week have you cried?Yes.

26. What breed was the last dog you saw? That is a very good question…… The last that I can clearly remember seeing/petting was a long-haired Chihuahua a few weeks ago at the mall.

27. Do you dry off in the shower or out of the shower?Out of the shower.

28. Have you ever kissed a football player?Nope!

29. Do you think you’re old?Not really, haha. I always feel super young at heart, anyway.

30. Do you like text messaging?I do! I can be bad at it sometimes though, forgetting to reply to messages and whatnot. 😅

31. What type of day are you having?A decent, relaxing day! I took a warm bath earlier and washed my hair and put on some comfy pj’s and just lounged around. I played some video games and had a few photoshoots not too long ago.

32. Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced?I have! But I have a freckle on my nose that often gets mistaken for a nose stud all the time so I kinda don’t really need one. 😂

33. Do you prefer warm or cold weather?Cold weather ALL the way, my dudes.

34. Is there a person of the opposite sex who means a lot to you?Of course; there are a couple. 😌

35. Would you prefer a relationship or a fling?Definitely a relationship. Flings aren’t my thing at all.

36. Are you a simple or complicated person?I am a very complicated person, for sure.

37. What song are you listening to?Lithium - Nirvana

38. When you say you’re sorry do you mean it?Oh, absolutely.

39. Is there a girl that knows everything or almost everything about you?There is, but we are no longer friends, so there’s that, lmao.

40. What made you start liking the person you like now?I just naturally clicked with him ever since we first started talking. :’) He’s so groovy and we have a lot of the same interests. He’s a very cute, down-to-earth, gentle, friendly spirit and I dig it.

41. When did you last receive a text message?Like 20 minutes ago or so.

42. What is wrong with you right now?Nothing at all, actually??? Which is EXTREMELY rare, and I’m honestly just kind of raising my eyebrow about that, haha. I’m totally enjoying living a worry-free life at the moment, though. Gotta soak up that kind of stuff for as long as it lasts and never take it for granted.

43. How well do you know the last female you texted?The last female I texted is my mom, and I know her better than anybody else!

44. Does anyone disgust you?Yeah.

45. Would you date someone right now if they asked?No, because I’m already seeing someone.

46. Are you in a good mood right now?Very much so!

47. Who was the last person you talked to in person?My mom.

48. What color shirt are you wearing?I’m not wearing a shirt right now 😅🙈

49. Has someone recently told you something you didn’t want to hear?Not too recently, no. I can’t think of anything, anyway.

50. Anyone you’re giving up on?Not anymore, because I’ve already given up on them. It’s too late.

51. Do you hate the person you fell hardest for?Hmm. No, I don’t think “hate” is the most fitting word. I’m just still bitter and hurt about the way things had to be. But I’m getting over it, I think, with each passing day. It is what it is.

52. Have you ever thought about giving up on someone but couldn’t?No; I’m the kind of person who can never imagine giving up on someone. But I’ve had to do that quite a bit these past few months! I’m surprising myself every day.

53. Do you like rain?I loooooove rain. 😍

54. Do you care if your boyfriend/girlfriend drinks?I’m a worrier, so of course I care, haha, but like, as long as they don’t get blackout drunk then it’s cool with me.

55. Have you ever liked somebody and never told them?Of course.

56. Do you like to cuddle?I LOVE TO CUDDLE OMDJSKSH

57. Are you shy?I certainly have my moments, yes, haha 😅

58. Do you get along with girls?Not as well as I could. Most of my friends these days are guys.

59. Have you dated the person you texted last?Yes, I currently am.

60. What do you carry with you at all times?My rainbow bag which contains my meds, my iPod + earbuds, a barrel brush and comb, my wallet, and Chapstick.

61. If you were paid 1 million dollars to spend the night in a supposed haunted house, would you?Dude, you wouldn’t even have to pay me to do that LOL I would willingly volunteer for free because that’s just the kind of spooky bitch I am 😂

62. Do you think you can last in a relationship for five months?Yeah, if the relationship is strong and communication is good.

63. Think back to October, were you in a relationship?I was.

64. The person you like kisses you on the forehead, do you find this cute?Of coURSe omg!!!!!

65. Did anything “cute” happen in the last week?Lots of cute things happened last week. 😋

66. How old are the last three people you kissed?I have only kissed two people, like I said somewhere up above, and they are 20 and 21.

67. Would you rather pay to get your nails done or do them yourself? Do them myself, tbh.

68. Which do you like better- Zebra print or leopard print? Leopard print!

69. Do you have any stickers on your car? I don’t drive, but my mom has a Who sticker on her car! She used to have a Beatles one.

70. Would you rather listen to Luke Bryan or Lil Wayne? I don’t know who Luke Bryan is, but I don’t really care for Lil Wayne, so……….I’m just gonna walk away from this question 😂😂😂

71. Blackberry, Anroid, or iPhone? iPhone.

72. When’s the last time you had pizza from Pizza Hut? Not too terribly long- maybe a good few weeks ago?

73. Do you like diet soda? Ehh, not really? It’s all right I guess.

74. What color are the walls in your room? My main room is aqua blue and my adjoining room is a really nice purple color. 💙💜

75. Are you 16 or older? I am 21!

76. Do you watch Pretty Little Liars? No I don’t.

77. Do you have a job? Nope, not at the moment.

78. What are your initials? K.G.H.

79. Did you ever have braces? Nope!

80. Are you from the south? I sure am, haha.

81. What does your last status on facebook say? Lmaoooo I have no clue, my dude, I haven’t posted a status on FB in years. 😂

82. Do you still talk to the first person you ever kissed? No.

83. Are you closer to your mom or your dad? My mom, without a doubt.

84. Have you ever done cheerleading or gymnastics? Nope, although I kiiiiinda wish I did? Because I’m really flexible and it sounds like fun!

85. What’s the last movie you saw in theaters? I genuinely don’t remember omg but I’m seeing Fist Fight this Friday so I can say that, at least!

86. Do you smoke? Nah.

87. Would you rather wear heels or flip flops? Hmmmm, flip flops, I guess.

88. Is your phone touch screen? It is!

89. Do you normally wear your hair straight or curly? My hair is weird to explain lmao I curl my hair under if that makes sense???

90. Have you ever snuck out of your house? Not out of MY house, haha.

91. Would you rather swim in a river, lake, or pool? I can’t swim so I’m just gonna say pool so that I can at least remain on the shallow end 😂😂😂

92. Have you ever made out in a car? Nopers.

93. …Had sex in a car? Lmao nooooo.

94. Are you single or in a relationship? I’m in a relationship. ☺️

95. What were you doing last night at midnight? Probably playing a video game, lmao 😂

96. When’s the last time you saw fireworks? On New Years

97. Do you like the camera on your phone? It’s all right! I don’t mind it, but it definitely could be of better quality.

98. Have you ever had a friend with benefits? Uhhh, kinda…… It’s hard to explain lmao

99. Have you ever passed out from drinking? Noooo.

100. Are you friends with people on facebook that you actually hate? I am LOL don’t ask me why!

101. Have you ever had a pregnancy scare? Nah.

102. Name your favorite Kesha song: Take It Off.

103. Do you have any tan lines right now? I don’t.

104. Would you ever wear cowboy boots with shorts? Not cowboy boots, no 😂

#about me #I wish I could make this a read more but I'm on mobile so I'm so sorry omg #at least it's p late at night and no one is on maybe

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