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#so if he said this it must be REALLY hard for him to keep up the pretenses rn :
j4ygyu · 2 days
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confessing to his mute crush | pjs
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pairing: jay x deaf!reader
genre: complete fluff
summary: jay and deaf reader both seem to like each other, just when he thinks that his confession was a pure failer the reader does something surprising.
“i. hope. i. am. not. late”  jay signed and chuckled as he fixed his cross body bag standing nervously infront of you which got out of place while he was running to the stop you had asked him to be at.
you smile at him, knowing he recently had learned sign language just to be able to communicate with you and so he was, a little slow and not so clear. 
you loved cycling alot, and bought this brand new bicycle and you had asked him if he wanted to spend a day out riding it and then go off to the beach and sit there. 
jay and you met through the same animal care shelter you guys volunteered to work at, his charming smile immediately caught your attention. however it was hard to communicate with your muteness, you only knowing sign language and him knowing none of it.
however within a span of few months, jay started learning it to be able to communicate with you. 
it made your heart flutter, i mean it’s the effort and dedication. still you asked yourself ‘does he even like me back?’
“is. this. the. new. cycle. that. you. bought?”he asked as you nodded and got off it, you touched the cute basket decorated with a small miffy teddy and a pink bow, it also had the dirty wrapper of chocolate you ate earlier. 
embarrassed, you took it out and threw it somewhere on the ground.
“i decorated it” you signed as he looked at you and smiled, making you blush as you looked away, anywhere but his eyes. 
“예쁘다” he said, even though you obviously didn’t hear him you read his lips quickly anyways. signing a quick thank you you sit back on your cycle and signal him to sit. 
he sits behind you hands on your shoulder as you begin to hit the pedal and ride around the city. 
some moments later you feel jay’s hand shifting from your shoulder to your waist now that you’re cycling in a well pace. 
the wind blows on your face blowing your hair back at his face too, you hit the break for a moment and turn around and give him an apologetic look. 
he smiles at you taking your hair and putting them to one side of your shoulder and keeping his chin on the other, staring at you the entire time he does so.
you squirm and try to get used to the feeling of his charp chin on your shoulder as it’s digging through. 
you shove the feeling off as you start riding again, this moment was really perfect for you, everything was so good. a nice cloudy, windy weather with your favorite person  friend hugging you by the waist and face on your shoulder, what a dream really.
you guys rode the cycle around the city, stopping by a store to get ice cream, as you parked your cycle near the store you guys stood on the footpath and he bought some ice cream.
you looked at him to see if he finished his and you caught him staring at you, he pretended to look around and controlled his cheeky smile but then something else caught your attention wired headphones connected to his phone in his pocket.
you grab them and gain his attention as he looks back at you “you like music?” he nodded and took his phone put of the pocket searching for something. 
curiously, you stared as you got closer to see his screen “this. is. my. favorite. song” he signed enthusiastically as you widen your eyes giving him a cheering gesture.
you stopped as you looked at him “i wish i could listen to it.. it must be nice” silence filled the space between both of you as you stared deep into you while smiling “it is.”both of you finished the ice cream before it melted.
after cycling and strolling around the pretty city here you were sitting on the rocks of the beach as the wind blew every once in a while.
jay had this thing forever in his mind, he loved you he loved you so damn much. everything you did got him screaming internally to wife him up.
“it’s fun being with you, you know?” you signed as jay felt his heart racing a million times in a second what could she mean by that? she probably meant as a friend right? or am i letting my stupid thoughts take over. 
“thank. you.” he says as you close your eyes and give him the widest smile. 
being with him made you feel full, it made you feel like finally you had a friend. but you quickly fell in love with him because of his mannerisms.
even though at school no one really bullied you, but there wasn’t something big for someone to  findi you interesting. emptiness fill inside of you, as for others you were just there, not enough things to be interesting for someone. or atleast for the people around you. jay knew these very well that’s why he hated the fact he fell in love with you so fast and was worried that you might reject him because of how fast everything would happen.
but little did he know that your feelings were pretty.. mutual you can say.
there was a wooden stick in your hand with which you were doodling on the beach sand with, jay was observing each and every move.
with that lavender sundress you were wearing it made everything 10 times cuter in his eyes. the way the wind slightly blew back your hair but you kept on fixing it.
you started moving the stick and you wrote your name’s inital with did adding a unfilled heart after it and looked at jay “want to try?” you ask bringing the stick closer to him as he accepts it. 
he looks at you for a second passing you a lovestruck look. 
J +
he writes before your names inital as you shoot him a confusing look with a nervous smile. 
he looks at you as his smile drops, emotions very visible in his eyes. 
=
he adds an equals to sign between your inital and the unfilled heart, following with filling the unfill heart that you drew. 
your smile drops as you stare back at him, completely in shock and he stares back with a regretful look in his eyes. 
you watch him take a big breath after looking at your reaction, not quite promising is it.
“i. like. you.” you sit there, puzzled. you don’t know whether to do something or cry, the moment feels unreal. 
it all felt so quick that you didn’t realise you haven’t responded to him yet for about past five minutes atleast. 
his hopeful looks now dies as he apologizes and stands up, “i am sorry, i am sorry, sorry i should leave i should probably leave.” he says as you try to read his lips “sorry…. should leave” you could pick up some of the words not many because of how rapid and low his mouth worked. 
you watch him stand up quickly wearing his bag not even sparing another glance at you as he starts walking away.
you felt your cheeks getting warm as everythinf starts getting blurry due to the upcoming tears.
you shake and get up dropping your own bag on the floor. 
“stay” 
did i say it right? you swore you heard the vibrations in your body of your own voice. not fully hearing what you said or if you said it right or no. 
breathing heavily, jay stops in his tracks as he turns around and stares at you in disbelief as you break down. right on that spot you were standing at. 
the word wasn’t clear and mix of broken and light cracks of course, a very weak one because of the vocal chords.
you felt bad for making him wait for so long or making his excitement go away for taking your no response as rejection.
you were just shocked, he actually liked you back? your entire life you felt so neglected and behind just because you were deaf, but now some thing good is finally.. happening?
now standing in a distance both of you staring at each other as he watches uncontrollable tears flow down your face as you sign a ‘i like you too.” while lowering your head and start sobbing. 
jay runs back to you and closes the distance, both of you hug like losers. 
because of the closeness you can feel his body vibrations and shivering, as you realise that he is crying you push him back to see his eyes now your eyes widened “why are you crying silly i should be the one crying..”
he just shrugs while trying to give you a smile and crying.
you bring your hands to wipe his tears off as you hold his face. his hands naturally rest on your waist. 
for a short moment you guys look deep into each other’s eyes as you lean in signaling for a kiss.
you felt him giggling like a teenage boy as he leaned in and pressed his soft lips to yours. 
he could taste the strawberry ice cream you ate earlier on your lips, your scent filling his nostrils and working as a hypnosis.
you pull away taking a long breath, “wasn’t it too long for a first kiss?” you sign while wiping away your own tears now and laughing.
once again complete silence fills the beach as the only thing playing if only you could hear, was the sound of the waves. both of you completely lost in each other’s eyes, it was like your eyes are speaking it all for you. 
but you noticed it, you noticed he was holding back a reply so you hit his chest “say it. say what you want to say.”
he broke the eye contact looking away at the sea, the waves coming and hitting the shore as his stupid smile came back on his face. 
he looked back at you and fixed your hair, brought his hands back to himself and signed at you. 
“i. could. kiss. you. for. an. eternity.”
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ckret2 · 2 days
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Chapter 49 of human Bill Cipher being such a miserable prisoner even the Pines are starting to feel bad for him: The Eclipse: Epilogue.
####
"The heck did you do to that poor woman?" Tate asked, staring out the window. Bill was sitting on the pier, legs dangling in the water, staring blankly into the depths. He was still muddy and trembling. "She looks more traumatized than when y'all left."
Ford couldn't meet Tate's gaze under the brim of his hat, but he could feel Tate raising a brow when he spotted Dipper pacing back and forth on the pier behind Bill, muttering furiously.
"We've had a very bad day," Ford said. 
"Uh-huh."
"Could I borrow your phone to call my brother?"
Outside, Dipper was oblivious to everything except the one line he'd managed to remember from the Axolotl, the words he'd picked out as they crossed the lake. "'Sixty degrees that come in threes,'" Dipper murmured. He knew that much. It was a poem. It was a rhyme. He couldn't remember the rest. What did it mean? He murmured it over and over to himself as he walked, trying to remember the next line, "'Sixty degrees that come in threes,' 'sixty degrees that come in threes'... breeze, freeze, ease, lease, knees—" He couldn't remember the rhyme.
Bill was considering grabbing Dipper by the ankle and dragging him off the pier just to shut him up when whatsisname, the younger McGucket came out of the shop. "Hello there? Miss Goldie?"
Human. Strange human. Human that Bill could get on his side. Be charming. He tried to remember how to be charming. He offered a feeble smile. "Yello?"
"I wanted to make sure you're all right," Tate said. "You look like you, uh... you've had a hard time."
Bill laughed ruefully. "Well, I've been dragged all over the mountain, I'm hungry, exhausted, and half-drowned, and I can barely walk—but I'm not currently dead. Allegedly. I'll take what I can get."
The corners of Tate's mouth twitched down in a concerned frown. "Is there anything you need? A..." He floundered for a moment, "A water, or...?"
"I've had enough water to last me a lifetime." He wondered idly whether he could claim he was too exhausted to make it all the way home—there was a sofa in the staff room, Tate would probably let the poor bedraggled "woman" take a nap, if Bill got that bit of distance between himself and the Pines maybe he could... maybe he could... do something with it? But he couldn't think of anything more definite than that and now Ford was coming back and the window of opportunity closed. He shrugged wearily. "Just need to get back to the shack. Thanks." He half heartedly used the lake water to wash the drying mud off his lower legs and knees.
"Stan will be here in about twenty minutes," Ford said, and tried to ignore the dirty look Tate gave him. 
"I'll be just inside if you need anything else," Tate said. "Watching." He headed inside—and then, indeed, stood at the shop window and watched.
Ford was never going to get on Tate's good side. He suspected Tate would be a little less sympathetic to the poor woman on the pier if he knew who he really was; but it certainly wouldn't make Tate like Ford any better for keeping him around.
"Nothing to do now but wait." Ford unloaded the rest of their supplies from the borrowed motor boat. He dropped Soos's Monster-Mon backpack beside Bill—it was heavy, Bill must have just shoved his clothes and bedsheet straight in without bothering to wring out the water—and the plastic bag of snacks Dipper had bought. "You ought to eat more while we wait." Ford nudged the snack bag.
Bill sneered at it. "I don't want that trash."
"What?" Ford examined the bag's contents. Jerky, chips, candy, cups of marshmallow cereal... "This is ninety percent of what you eat."
"Ninety percent of what I eat is what I can scavenge from the counters."
Ford looked through the bag again. Ah. Right. So it was. "If you want something else, you know you can ask us to..."
"Mac and cheese."
Maybe Ford had better stop talking. He sighed and glanced at Dipper to see how he was doing.
It didn't look like Dipper had even registered Ford's return, too busy pacing and muttering to himself. Ford frowned. "Dipper?"
"Axolotl," Bill explained. "He's obsessing over him. Didn't I tell you that meeting that thing would drive him insane?" He tilted his head toward Dipper. "Look at that, he's already mumbling to himself. Don't suppose you have his therapist's number, do you? I doubt that would save him, but it might slow the process—"
Ford shushed him.
Dipper had briefly tuned back into the conversation when he heard Bill say Axolotl; and now he grit his teeth and stubbornly tuned it back out. No. He was not going insane. Dipper would figure this out. If he just remembered the rest he'd be fine. He tried to go through all the potential rhymes alphabetically, "—bees, cease, d—deez?" That wasn't a word. "Fees, geese, he's..." and on and on, "seas, tees, uh... vees? Wheeze..."
"I've had enough of you trying to convince that boy he's about to go mad," Ford muttered to Bill. "What do you get out saying that? Even if you do convince him he's insane, it won't make him start trusting anything else you say."
"I'm not lying," Bill said heatedly. "You ought to know that, you've been in the multiverse, you've seen plenty of maddening sights. You saw them before you even left the Nightmare Realm."
Ford hesitated before responding; was Bill trying to persuade Ford he was insane? But he could still remember those first few moments of terror in the Nightmare Realm: the creatures that had seemed to move and shift in impossible ways as they swam in and out of dimensions Ford couldn't see, the lights and colors that throbbed like an inverted migraine, Bill himself seemingly suspended a million light years away and a foot in front of Ford's face at the same time. Until Ford had latched onto his quest to destroy Bill and let that focus him, his mind had felt like an unraveling sock. "You were chief among those maddening sights."
"I was," Bill acknowledged neutrally.
"But I didn't go insane."
"Because you knew when to look away." He cast a sideways glance at Dipper, an implicit unlike him. "I know you used to read cosmic horror. Do you know why the narrator always goes mad just from looking at some giant beast? It's not because it's too ugly to take. It's because once you meet something, you try to understand it; but if you want to understand the reality something like that comes from," he rolled an eye up toward where the invisible Axolotl had hung in the sky, "you have to lose your understanding of your own reality. They're incompatible. Like the lunatics who escaped Plato's cave and came back ranting about nonsense like sunlight and colors."
It was a twisted interpretation of the cave allegory. Plato had meant it as a metaphor for education: that learning about the true nature of reality was enlightening, but alienated you from your peers.
Perhaps to Bill, enlightenment and insanity were the same thing.
Ford murmured, "Once your eyes have been too dazzled by the sunlight to see the dim shadows, you'll never be awed by a candle again."
"You have been there before."
Ford didn't answer.
"Once you've seen something like that, if you let yourself dwell on the significance of it all, you're doomed. Better to tell yourself it's unimportant and try to forget it ever happened."
Ford thought of Fiddleford.
Bill twisted around to snap tiredly at Dipper, "So stop staring at the sun before you go blind, moron."
"Shut up." Dipper had been trying to mentally drown out Bill's dire predictions by grasping for more rhymes—"disease, unease, Socrates"—but enough filtered through to make his stomach churn with nervousness. What if Bill was right? What if he never remembered what the Axolotl told him—what if he drove himself mad trying? What if this turned into a lifelong obsession—but he'd be fine and could let it go once he remembered—was that the trap? Was whatever it had told him impossible for a human to remember? Was it something so incomprehensible a human couldn't remember it without going crazy?
But he'd seen plenty of stuff last summer that was supposed to make humans go "insane." Bill had to be messing with him. He remembered the first line—surely that meant he could remember the rest—but was that part of the trap? "'Sixty degrees that come in threes'... come on, there's something else, I know it, what is it? 'Sixty degrees that come in threes'—"
Bill sighed irritably. "'Watches through the eyes in trees.'"
Dipper stopped pacing. He hadn't realized he'd raised his voice enough to be audible. "What?"
"What?" Bill said.
"What's the rest of it?"
"What rest of it? It's a couplet. That's all," Bill said. "Is that what he told you? He gets rhymey when he feels self-important, it's no big deal. Maybe you're lucky. Put it out of your head and you'll be fine."
Dipper turned the words over in his head. Sixty degrees that come in threes, watches through the eyes in trees... "That's not exactly right," he said slowly. "It was 'watches from within birch trees.'"
"Is that how he translated it? I've never heard it in English before. I got close, though, I knew it'd rhyme."
Ford echoed, "'Sixty degrees that come in threes.' Like a triangle?"
Dipper gave him a perplexed look. "What?"
"You're taking geometry next year, aren't you? The inner angles of polygons always have the same number of degrees; and a triangle has a hundred and eighty degrees. Three angles of sixty degrees forms... an equilateral triangle."
Dipper and Ford stared at Bill.
Bill gave them a tired, unreadable look. "What?" he said. "Don't look at me. I'm not the only equilateral triangle in the universe."
Well, now Dipper was sure there was more to the poem than just a couplet. "How many other equilateral triangles spy on people through birch trees?"
"Lay off," Bill said crabbily. "I didn't have to tell you that line. Don't make me regret it." He planted his elbows on his knees, laced his hands together, pressed his forehead to them, and massaged his eyelids with his thumbs.
He tilted slightly to the right, keeping the weight of his head off his left arm.
####
"Nice shirt," Stan said, eyeing Ford's anger management t-shirt.
"If you like it, you can have it."
"What happened to your coat?"
"Somewhere at the bottom of the lake," Ford sighed.
"How...?"
"I'll fill you in later."
Bill's trembling was almost unnoticeable by the time Stan arrived. Or, at least, it was slight enough that he could stand and make the short walk from the pier to the car without an obvious struggle. 
He climbed into the back seat, slid across the bench, leaned against the door, wrapped his arms around his Monster-Mon backpack, fell asleep, and didn't wake up for the entire drive home.
Dipper and Ford fell silent when they noticed; and, sensing the heavy atmosphere, Stan followed suit.
####
The event organizers for Higher Dimensional Gate had arranged for the Magister Mentium's audience to surround him in a circle with as large a circumference as possible, so that as many shapes as possible could pack into the first few rows where they could see him. Even so, the crowd was much too large for everyone to be in the first few rows. Speakers had to be planted throughout the crowd so that they'd all be able to hear the Magister speak. Most of his audience couldn't see him.
But he, with his all-seeing eye, could see all of them.
The crowd extended back, row after row after row, in every direction like flecks of multicolor confetti filling the air all the way to the horizon. He'd never spoken to such a large crowd before. He didn't think he'd ever seen such a large crowd before.
Not all of them were his worshipers. He didn't have that many worshipers. The rest were drawn in by his boast—to be the first shape outside of legends to predict an eclipse, over six months ahead of schedule. They were here for a spectacle. He meant to give them one.
If he succeeded, all these spectators would become his worshipers, he was sure of it. If he didn't succeed, he lost everything. The whole nation knew about his bet. He'd be financially ruined. His worshipers would abandon him. There would be no fleeing to a new town and starting over; everyone everywhere knew who he was. His life would be over.
This would be only the third eclipse he could recall. There's no way to neatly map shape ages onto human ages. Different year lengths, different aging speeds, different mental and physical milestones. But approximately, compared to a human, he was scarcely over fifteen years old. 
But he wouldn't fail. He pushed all his fears aside. He didn't even want to think about them. He wouldn't, because he couldn't, because he could see what nobody else saw. He could see the eclipse's approach.
It was traveling across the vast empty gulf outside the world.
The only other third dimensional objects he'd ever seen were the sun—which looked to him like a circle—and the stars—which seemed to be mere points. He assumed all third dimensional objects were fundamentally just second dimensional objects, moving on a strange plane. He had no capacity to model a 3D object in his mind.
But the eclipse was a beast that twirled and gyrated around impossible axes, moving and rotating in ways his eye couldn't even comprehend. To him, it looked as though the living creature—he assumed it was a living creature, sometimes it manifested a couple of limbs or an eye—was constantly shapeshifting, its perimeter moving and altering. Its uncanny undulations had haunted his nightmares for months after he first watched it, so young he'd barely started school. It wasn't any less nightmarish now.
But as incomprehensible and terrifying as it was, he could see it, and nobody else here could, and that was all that mattered. He could watch it on the horizon and publicly announce that it would cross the sun in two weeks—and then in about three days—and then, to his humiliation, not tomorrow but today, guaranteed, as the creature sped up and threw off his estimate. His worshipers and bemused spectators had taken over the square to while away the time. They'd quickly gathered around him to wait after he'd declared it would arrive within the hour
That had been almost an hour and a half ago. The stupid thing had slowed down.
The triangle was terrified.
In every direction, shapes were staring at him. Waiting. His father was watching him—his stare seemed to grow heavier by the minute. He could see reporters in the crowd taking notes.
He had to fight not to pace, not to cringe, not to show any nerves in front of the hundreds of eyes.
Now. It had to be now. It was so close. Please don't let him be wrong. Every cord in his body quivered in terror as he grabbed his microphone and announced: "Lines, bis, tris—quads, quints, and more! My dear students and beloved believers, and my—" he cut off the urge to say something nastier, "—curious visitors, who I hope will join our quest for enlightenment. This is the moment you've been waiting for! The eclipse is upon us! In less than a minute, it will begin!" He had to keep his gaze forward as he spoke, looking at his audience. (His mother had always said the way his eye went white when he was looking at the third dimension unnerved people.) "Soon—you won't have to take all my claims about the third dimension on faith. You'll be able to see for yourself the effect of the third dimension on the plane."
The crowd murmured excitedly. He could see his father relax. He stared up-but-not-north, gnawing nervously on his eyelid until he caught himself. The beast above glowed a warm pink in the light of the nearby sun.
And the stupid thing. Slowed. Again.
He stared in disbelief.
"Sixty seconds," his father whispered, out of range of the microphone.
His stomach flopped. He was dead.
"One minute, fifteen seconds. What's going—?"
He held his microphone away and hissed, "The eclipse decided to zigzag."
"Eclipses can zigzag?"
"Shhh!" He'd already failed. He'd already shown everyone he was wrong. He could hear the murmurs. His eye hurt from staring at the sun and from straining for so long to turn so far upward-not-northward, go faster faster faster—
There! The snout of the eclipse was this close to kissing the perimeter of the sun. He cried triumphantly, "Now!"
The wretched beast did a loop-the-loop around the sun and missed it entirely.
The triangle felt the last strands of his fraying self-composure snap.
He howled in rage.
He could hear laughs from the crowd. They felt like daggers in his sides.
"ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!" He was bellowing into outer space as if he thought it might hear him, "Do your think this is a game?! Is this funny?! Are you trying to humiliate me in front of the whole world!" His father put a hand on his arm; the triangle shoved him away. "Get back here right now! You thick, brainless, blobby, pink, feeler-faced two-eyed freak of nature! GET BACK HERE and LOOK ME IN THE EYE!" He was a lunatic, everyone would know it, their leader raving in a direction no one could actually see about some big pink delusion, what did he care, no one would ever take him seriously again anyway—
And the thing in the sky.
Stopped.
And looped back.
And came closer, and closer, and bigger, and bigger—it just kept getting bigger, how far away had it been before, how large was it, how large was the sun?
He hardly noticed the crowd's gasp as the creature twirled between them and the sun—the light shone through its body, pink with blood—and then out of the way, and then in again, and out—until finally it was so close that its perimeter completely engulfed the sun. He'd taken a field trip to the planet's surface once—an enormous solid mass of stone and crystal. Until now, he'd never seen another solid objects so large. To his limited understanding of 3D objects, it looked as though there were no organs inside its perimeter—just a layer of solid, uninterrupted flesh. He didn't know how it could even move.
It stopped straight over him.
He was sure the two black circles embedded inside its body must be its eyes. His whole life he'd heard psychic powers—psychic powers like his own—described as having an "inner eye." But he'd thought the phrase was just a metaphor. An eye on the inside of a body instead of on its perimeter would be useless to most people. He'd never seen a creature with an eye literally on the inside of its body. But the eclipse had two.
And they were looking at him.
A giant ever-shapeshifting cosmic horror from outside of reality, staring through the veil separating the sane world from outerplanar space, and it was looking—at—him.
He was terrified.
He heard an alien voice in his head, vast and deep and slow as distant whale song:
"Hello there!" It was overjoyed. It was tickled pink. "I've never been spoken to by a shape on the wall before. I didn't know you could see off of it!"
Weakly, the triangle repeated, "'A shape on the'...?"
"Yes, this wall of yours." The eclipse gestured with its tail at—everything. A single sweep that took in an entire dimension. "I've probably commuted past this wall billions of times, and nothing's ever called to me before. I didn't know shadows could do that!"
"'Shadows'?" the triangle echoed again. That was all they were? An eclipse's shadows?
"I'm absolutely delighted," the eclipse said. "First contact from a lower-dimensional species! I've watched you for eons and never imagined. Isn't this exciting! How charming of you! Tell me who you are."
Him? "Me?"
"Of course. Who else?" It stared at him. Only him. A shapeshifting force of nature the size of a planet with two inner eyes, an eclipse that saw him as a shadow—and it was looking only at him.
Weakly, he said, "I'm... the Magister Mentium."
The eclipse thought that over. Its tone was a tad dubious and not terribly impressed (why should it be impressed? he was embarrassed at himself for giving his silly puffed-up title)—but it said, "Yes, I suppose that's true. I am the Axolotl. It's been a pleasure meeting you." It began to shapeshift again—its eyes slid sideways through its body, until one reached its perimeter and disappeared.
It dawned on the triangle, in its first immature understanding of third dimensional objects, that its eye had disappeared because the Axolotl was turning away. "Wait!" he cried. "Why..." Why answer him? Why focused on him so completely, if he was just a shadow? Why ask who he was like he mattered? He didn't even know how to put those questions to words in his own mind, much less out loud. "Why are you here so early?"
The Axolotl turned back to the triangle. "Oh! I had to go back for some documents I forgot at the office. Big case in the morning," it said. "You shadows know my schedule?"
"You... pass in front of the sun."
The Axolotl turned away, eyes disappearing and frills fluttering, to look at the sun. "So I do! How funny." It turned toward the triangle and gave him a strange, grotesque look that—by the tone of its psychic voice—he suspected was a smile. "I must get going. I'll be heading into the office a few hours late tomorrow, but perhaps I'll see you again then." And it turned away. It felt like it took forever for the enormous body to sail over-not-north-of the triangle—and pass, at last, out of the sun's path.
The triangle didn't look down-but-not-south until someone shook his side—his father. He lowered his dazed gaze to the crowd—the cheering, applauding crowd. Ma-gi-ster, Ma-gi-ster. A sea of multicolor confetti shapes that filled the air to the horizon.
Shadows.
His father shook him again—"Go on, say something. They're waiting"—and the triangle held up his mic as though he were in a dream. He tried to remember what he was supposed to say. "I was right," he said flatly. "Just like I always told you. I can see the third dimension. The realm of dreams—of colors, of light, and..." The lies left a sick taste in the back of his eye. He couldn't say them. Points of light in darkness and pink nightmares.
"I'm s— You'll all have to excuse me," he said, his voice childish and small. "I can't—I've had a... a... profound... spiritual experience. I must meditate on the revelations I've received." The words felt like woo-woo mumbo-jumbo. "The next eclipse will be a few months after the new year." It seemed important, for some reason, to pass that information on. Wasn't that what he always said he did? Share the wisdom of third dimensional spirits with his followers? "I... have to go now."
His father took his elbow. "This is your moment," he whispered. "Come on, son—you don't want to lose your chance to speak directly to them, do you?"
He shoved the microphone in his father's side. "You speak to them."
"But—"
"I can't," he said. "I can't."
He cut through the crowd as fast as it would part for him—if they were any slower, he'd have started stabbing his way through—haunted the whole way by their applause.
####
And that was it.
From the Axolotl's perspective, he had just had a brief pleasant exchange with a precocious tadpole in a sidewalk puddle.
From the triangle's perspective, he might as well have been standing on the boat deck watching as Cthulhu rose from his millennia of dead slumber at the bottom of the ocean, turned to the fragile vessel bobbing on the waves, and said, "Good morning! Glorious weather we're having, isn't it?"
And from the perspective of the Higher Dimensional Gate, their Magister Mentium had predicted an eclipse, been rightfully insulted when it didn't come the exact second he ordered it, and furiously summoned down an eclipse darker and swifter and longer than any in recorded history.
Up until then, he had been seen as, at best, an oracle. A prophet. A messenger to share the secrets of the third dimension, but that was all he could do. But now, he had commanded forces in an unseen dimension, creating an eclipse months before it was natural. He had made it flicker on and off like he had his finger on the sun's light switch. News reports and the most unimpeachable scientific authorities reported that the eclipse had centered on the location of the Higher Dimensional Gate rally, narrowed down to an inexplicably small radius around that point, and then remained unchanged for several long minutes, long enough for anyone in its shadow to grow fatigued from the missing sunshine. Nothing like that had ever happened before. It defied every known fact about the science of eclipses.
People around the gathering—even people who had known nothing about the Higher Dimensional Gate rally—reported that during the eclipse, they'd become inexplicably disoriented, unable to tell compass directions, and had felt themselves fall toward the darkness—as if gravity's pull had suddenly moved from the south to the epicenter of the eclipse. Public building inspections confirmed that somehow the entire town had shifted, ever so slightly, closer to the epicenter. Closer to the Magister.
Never mind prophecy; as far as the Magister's rapidly-increasing followers were concerned, he might have been a god.
It was the greatest triumph a baby cult leader could ask for.
He barely noticed.
####
For days, he could hardly sleep, speak, or think. He kept losing track of conversations to stare into space. Now, it awed his followers when his eye turned an empty white—he must have been communing with something in a higher dimension.
He didn't argue. It was better than letting them know he was losing his mind.
He spent his time alone locked in his room, pacing back and forth, trying not to look up-but-not-north and failing. Dwelling on the significance of it all. Feeling like he'd never figure it out.
He used to love cosmic horror stories, back when he had time to read. They followed a reliable pattern: the hero travels farther than any rational shape ever should, meets something big, and goes mad from the realization.
And what was it that the hero always realized? That he was a dust fleck in the firmament. That he was insignificant. That he didn't matter. That there were things out there he'd never seen before and would never truly understand, and that they cared not for mere shadows on the wall like him, and that in the grand scheme of the cosmos he was nothing. That he was utterly unimportant.
In moments of what felt like lucidity in between the shivering horror, the triangle  wryly acknowledged that it was no surprise he'd ended up in a cosmic horror story. He could see into another dimension. In the stories he'd read, that made it all but inevitable.
But all the authors had gotten the maddening revelation wrong. He could have handled knowing he was nothing. It almost would have been a relief. 
True horror was knowing he mattered.
He'd spent the majority of his young life selling the idea that he was oh-so-important, as part of a big con to trick gullible idiots into liking him and flinging cash at his rotten undeserving family—and he'd only been able to do it because when the guilt got to him, when his conscience asked what would become of the shapes forking over their life savings on false promises of divine secrets, he could look out into bleak black space and tell himself that nothing really mattered, nothing was important, nothing he'd ever do would really make a difference, and the people he manipulated didn't matter any more than he did. He meant everything to his worshipers, and nothing to the universe. He could do anything and it didn't matter.
For a moment, a vast mind-melting shape-shifting incomprehensible eldritch god had focused its full attention on him—of all the universe, of all the dimensions beyond the known universe, it had looked at him and only him—a mere shadow on the wall, and yet in that moment, it found him interesting. It found him worthy of notice. He had screamed into the cold uncaring void, and the void had cared. For a moment, he'd held cosmic importance. He mattered. His actions mattered.
He'd felt it see him as important, but why? What was so important about him? There had to have been something significant he'd done, something he showed it, something in what he said. He replayed their conversation in his mind over and over and over and over, trying to remember what he'd done that proved he mattered.
He didn't know what it was. He couldn't find it. All he could remember was just... being.
The writers were wrong. Cosmic horror wasn't when an elder god's eyes slid past you without noticing you existed. It was when the elder god gazed down at you at your lowest and bleakest, during your most petty and selfish act of mass swindling, from a dimension where not even slamming the door and shutting your eye could shield you from its gaze—and it decided you were worth caring about. Cosmic horror was when you encountered a colossal alien that planted the incomprehensibly alien idea in your head that you had an inherent worth just because you existed. Cosmic horror was when a force of nature asked the name of a shadow on the wall.
If it was true... if it all mattered... then what was he doing? How could he? What had he done?
####
He was lucky—he was lucky that his parents had raised him to think so clearly about issues like morality and money and easy marks. His only saving grace was that he was too rational to seriously entertain the Axolotl's mad ideas.
And yet, his mind boiled with mad regret. It blazed with insane guilt. The heat of it could burn him out. It was months before he could continue his public sermons without feeling sick—and even once he did, he could still feel the delusion that what he did mattered, festering in his mind.
It would fester for the next trillion years.
####
(And that concludes this plot arc! I hope y'all enjoyed it!! I'd love to hear what y'all thought of the whole thing—especially now that we've looped back to the original eclipse. 😁)
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acey-wacey · 2 days
Note
Hello! Can I request a sunflower with Silver?
I typically don't allow anons on events but this prompt was just too cute, I couldn't resist! Thank you so much for your support!
...
Pairing - Silver x Reader
Prompt - Childhood Friends
...
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"Hello."
Silver blinked his eyes open to see a fuzzy figure hovering over him. He didn't even notice he had closed his eyes in the first place. And he was trying so hard to stay awake for the first day of primary school.
"Hi," the figure prodded. As Silver pawed at his groggy eyes, his vision cleared to reveal a child, about his age standing over him with a curious look. His head was propped up against the cubbies. He must have fallen asleep during reading time again.
"Hello," Silver responded, blinking at the person who had woken him up.
"You fell asleep during reading," you said, cocking your head at the sleepy boy with curiosity. "Don't worry though, I asked Miss Lilac so many questions so she would be too distracted to be mad at you."
He just stared blankly at you.
"It's lunch time now. Everybody else already left," you continued. "What's your name?"
"I'm Silver," Silver said through a tiny yawn. You plopped down in front of him cross-legged.
"I'm Y/N," you said and took your little backpack off your little shoulders. You unpacked your princess lunchbox while Silver watched inquisitively. When you looked back up at the boy in front of you, you furrowed your brows. "Don't you have a lunch?"
"Yeah," Silver mumbled quietly. "Why are you here if everybody's gone for lunch?"
"Miss Lilac always lets me stay in the classroom for lunch," you said as you began unpacking your sandwich, apple slices, oat bar, and baby carrots. A lunch fit for a little kid. "Nobody else wants to sit with me so it's more fun to just stay in here."
Silver stared at you for a moment before reaching for his own backpack.
"I'll sit next to you," he said with a small smile. You face immediately lit up.
"Really?" you exclaimed with glee. Before he could react, Silver was buried in a hug. You nuzzled your face into the side of his cheek with a smile. "You're my best friend now, Silver."
"I've never had a best friend before," Silver said plainly as you pulled away, back to your original criss-cross. "What do best friends do?"
"Weeeelll..." you dragged the word out for a long time. "They eat lunch together."
"We're already doing that."
"Yeah, that's why we're already best friends!" you almost yelled, so excited by the prospect of having a best friend that you forgot the manners your mom had taught you. "They also share a bunch of stuff."
You held up a couple of your apple slices to Silver.
"Here."
Silver took the apples and nibbled on them as he unpacked his own lunch which was a Tupperware full of something you couldn't identify.
"I would share some of my lunch with you but I don't think you can eat it," Silver said sheepishly.
"What do you mean?"
"My father made my lunch for me, but I don't think it's people food."
"Is your dad a person?" you asked. Silver had to think about it.
"I don't know. I'll ask him when I get home."
"Can I come with you?" you asked eagerly. Silver looked surprised.
"Come home with me?"
"Yeah!" you bounced up and down from your seat on the floor. "Best friends do that too! They go to each other's houses and they have playdates."
"Sure, if my father says yes."
"Yay!" It seemed like your excitement was bursting out of you. You could barely keep still but you wanted to keep sitting next to your new best friend. "Maybe we can get married at your house!"
"I don't think kids are allowed to get married," Silver said with a confused look. "It's only for grown-ups."
"Okay, then, when we're grown-ups, we have to have a playdate and get married."
"Okay!" Silver said, a smile on his face. "Pinky promise."
You broke out in a grin almost too big for your face.
"Pinky promise."
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mina-saiyat · 6 hours
Note
Sana fucking her hot manager in front of some trainees to make them know that they'll be fucktoys for their future managers
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"Dear trainees, thank you for your hard work!" Sana's sweet voice echoed throughout the dance studio through the microphone. "The next course we are going to conduct is training on idol professional ethics." Sana said with a smile, "As a qualified idol, we should always keep in mind our identity and responsibilities, especially for the company, we not only need to work hard to improve business capabilities, it is even more necessary to make good contractual arrangements with the company. "
"So, in order to let everyone understand this better, I specially invited my manager, to give a live demonstration for everyone." Sana said as she walked towards the dance practice room, "Please sit quietly, he will come in soon."
As soon as she finished speaking, a middle-aged man in a suit and leather shoes opened the door and walked in. It was Sana's manager. Sana bowed respectfully to him, then walked to him, knelt down, and began to untie his belt.
All the trainees present opened their eyes in surprise and stared at this scene in stunned silence - their goddess idol actually knelt down in such humiliation in front of a strange man?
Sana gently took off the manager's trousers, then lowered her head and took the already hard giant member into her mouth and swallowed it.
"This is one of the responsibilities we must fulfill as idols." Sana raised her head and smiled at the trainees, "If you want to make a smooth debut, you must always obey the company's arrangements and requirements. Do you understand?"
Sana stroked his lower body with the tip of her flexible tongue, making a sucking sound. Her movements were skillful and dedicated, as if she was serving her beloved lover. The trainees were all blushing and couldn't believe that this idol who had always shown a sweet image would do such a thing.
"Ah…Miss Sana, you are such an outstanding idol…" The manager sighed comfortably, stretched out his hand to pinch Sana's cheeks and fixed her mouth deeper, "Your service is great... It’s really unforgettable…"
Sana twisted her tongue in cooperation to speed up the swallowing. At the same time, she used her other hand to hold his balls and gently manipulate it. Her skills were so superb that the manager almost screamed with joy. The faces of the trainees present were also flushed, and some girls couldn't help but reach out and cover their lips.
"Sana…I'm going to cum…" The manager groaned, and all the thick white liquid shot into Sana's mouth. Sana carefully swallowed every drop before letting go of his clone.
"This is the duty of an idol." Sana smiled and wiped the traces from the corner of her mouth, "As long as you study hard, you will definitely have the opportunity to experience this process for yourself in the future."
The girls present nodded, their eyes full of admiration and desire.
The manager didn't end there, but strode forward, grabbed Sana's arm, and roughly tore off her suspender dress. S
"Dear trainees, the following is a more in-depth lesson." The manager said with a sneer, "Although Sana is an excellent idol on the surface, she is actually a dirty slut in her heart. This is A privilege only enjoyed by the company's top executives."
He pulled off Sana's underwear, and two pink breast balls popped out, and the two red cherry blossoms on the top were already erect. "Look, Sana's body is so sensitive. She gets so excited just by being touched by us." He said jokingly, holding Sana's breasts with both hands and rubbing them.
Sana was panting heavily and her body limply leaned against Mr. Li. "Ah…um…gently…Oppa…" Sana let out a few indistinct moans, and her two long legs began to rub involuntarily.
"This is the essence of idols." The manager said as he slid his fingers between Sana's legs and touched a wet heat. "They appear pure and lovely on the surface, but in fact they want to be conquered more than anyone else , being fucked hard."
Manager took off his suit pants and his huge penis popped out. He held Sana's waist and penetrated her pussy hard. Sana let out a high-pitched scream, her eyes rolled white, and her whole body was shaking.
"Everyone, take a good look at it. This is what Sana really looks like." The manager thrust harder and faster, hitting the deepest part of Sana every time. "You will be like her in the future and become a high-level person in the company, Just sex toys."
Sana completely lost her mind under manager's attack. She grabbed his arm, raised her head and screamed loudly, and tightly wrapped her legs around his waist. Manager thrust into her roughly, hitting the most sensitive spot every time, causing Sana to moan even louder.
The girls present looked in a daze. Some couldn't help but put their hands into their skirts, while others stared at the scene of Sana being fucked with blurred eyes. "This is the true face of idols." Manager said coldly, "Only through this kind of training can they learn how to please us ."
Sana's screams became louder and louder, and she felt that her climax was coming, and her muscles all tensed up. "Ah…I'm coming…Manager nim …harder…" Sana begged in a whisper, "Fuck me…fuck my pussy hard…"
The manage loss his control and increased the intensity, thrusting dozens of times quickly, and then released thick semen in the deepest part of Sana. Sana let out a high-pitched sigh, and then fell into the aftermath of her climax.
"Okay, everyone has seen it." Manager arranged his clothes and said to the trainees, "Sana has been manipulated to be submissive from her debut. Everyone must remember that the idol is just in our hands. It's just a toy, and it must always cater to our needs like her."
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discotitsposts · 1 day
Text
i heard that
reader overhears spencer checking on their baby
dad spencer x mom reader
rated e for everyone
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As you lay your lovely baby girl down for her nap after gently rocking her, you hear footsteps behind you. You turn and see Spencer with the sweetest smile on his face.
“She’s so tired.” You whisper very quietly.
Spencer leans over the crib and just stares at her smiling. Tears brimming his eyes at the sight.
“She’s so precious.” He whispers quietly back. You motion for him to follow you to the kitchen and you make yourselves a snack.
“Let’s watch something!” You say picking up the baby monitor and your lunch and bringing it into the living room.
Spencer picks up his own lunch and gets you both something to drink. “Sure,” he calls from the kitchen, “You can pick something.”
You rack your brain for what to pick when you hear a noise. “Spence did you hear that?”
“Hear what?” He walks in and hands you your drink.
You motion him to “shh” and listen carefully.
You can hear your little baby softly babbling in her sleep.
“I’ll go check on her.” Spencer says getting up and going upstairs. You nod and pick a tv show to watch. You listen to the monitor and hear the shuffling of Spencer entering the room over the sound of your daughter, now crying.
“What’s the matter little princess? What do you need? Are you hungry?” You hear him say. “Here maybe this will help.” You hear the sound of him walking and figure he must be taking her to the rocking chair to calm her down. She quiets down immediately.
“Oh now you’re sleepy again. You just missed us, huh? I’m sorry sweetheart. I love you so much.” He continues speaking softly to her. “You have no idea darling. You and your mother are the best things that ever happened to me. Do you know that?” He’s speaking so gently.
His words have you in tears. This was too adorable. You hear him laugh over the monitor. You have to see this. You grab your phone and sneak up the stairs and watch him cradling her.
“You both make me so so happy everyday and remind me of the good in this world.” He’s having a hard time holding back any emotion by now and is crying tears of joy while laughing.
You snap a picture and then get a look at your daughter’s face and almost start laughing. She’s looking up at him in confusion.
(like this 🤨)
He keeps talking while she’s staring up at him like omg dude put me back to bed already, and it’s killing you! You start wheeze laughing because you can’t hold it in anymore. Spencer hears your faint laughing and looks down at your daughter.
“Oh really? I didn’t know you understood what I said. Wow! So expressive. You wanna go back to bed now?” He asks standing up.
She simply responds with “ah,” and smiles.
“Alright, geez, go back to sleep little ms. bossy pants.” He gives her a kiss on her head and then gently lays her back down and covers her with her baby blanket with the lions and giraffes on it.
You step into the room smiling so hard your face hurts.
“You,” He holds her tiny little hand, she grabs his finger. “Have captivated my heart since you were born.” He removes his hand and spins around. “And you, have had my heart since the day we met.” He taps your nose. You smile.
“ah,” She coos one last time before nodding off.
“Doesn’t she look cozy?” Spencer nods. She’s wearing a fuzzy pink strawberry print onesie, courtesy of auntie Penelope. You turn on her moon and stars nightlight and gently shut the door.
You and Spencer are quiet until you get back downstairs.
“When did you sneak in?” He asks.
“When I heard you tell her how much you love us.”
“Oh you heard that?” He asks.
You pick up the baby monitor, “I heard that.”
“Ahh, makes sense.” He lays down on the couch loosening his tie and removing his shoes. He takes a candy from the snack bowl and eats it.
You lay down on the couch with him and click play on The Munsters.
Three episodes in, you’ve fallen asleep too. Yawning at first before your eyes closed fully. Spencer keeps awake and watches you while running his hand through your hair. His soft caresses had practically welcomed the sleepiness into your eyes.
Spencer was the happiest he’d ever been.
the end💞
-
-
happy spencer happy spencer
tags 🍓 -
@whoisspence
@lemonadeinfuser
@fictionalobssed
@exoticisles
@in-another-april
@gallifreyan-idiocracy
(if anyone else would like to join tag list you can comment a 🍓)
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Does anyone else think about how Shinji said this twice...
The first time was somewhat innocent, because he didnt believe in the idea of fate. He refused the idea outright because it was just too bleak. He wanted to think that there was a way for everyone to live, so why believe in something like destiny or predetermination?
And yet... He likely said this out loud to comfort Tezuka, to motivate him, to keep him from giving into despair. Shinji does not believe in fate, but the person he is dragging out of the battle field does, and he wants Tezuka to borrow his own feelings of determination and passion for just a moment, so they can both live to see the next day.
But what Shinji doesnt understand is that Tezuka did this sacrifice precisely because of Shinji's passion. Shinji has nothing to offer to this man because Tezuka has already made the choice to purposely refuse the benefits of Shinji's savior complex. He make his choice the moment that he walked out the door of Atori, and purposely distanced himself so Shinji wouldn't try to die for someone else. Tezuka explains that he changed fate for Shinji to live. Tezuka explains that he took this man's place so that Shinji can fight in this war, so that Shinji can find an end to the violence. Tezuka wants him to continue where he would fail, where he would have blamed himself for the death of another friend and never gotten back up.
Shinji wishes there was another option, that he could have somehow seen this coming and stopped Tezuka and figured out a way to live too... But what can he really do? Tezuka's last words left such an impact on him, and while Shinji originally didn't believe in fate, he could not help but lean into the idea after Tezuka's death. He tends to weigh other people's ideas more than his own in his head, so when Tezuka dies because he followed his principles to the end like this... He just can't deny it as much as before. Denying that fate exists would be spitting on the face of his friend's choice, right?
So the idea sits with him. The idea that fate was already changed... He's not sure if he can believe it, but he can't not believe it, either. There had to have been another way that things have gone, right? That's what he wants to think, but he cannot deny the weight of Tezuka's ultimate choice. He has to learn to accept this, somehow, but it's hard for him, it's hard to remember which thoughts are his own and which thoughts are borrowed from his memories of Tezuka. Shinji slowly becomes burdened by the idea of fate. Believing in Tezuka's last hope is the only way for him to continue, it's the only way for him to cope.
And that's when the narrative throws a fucking curveball. This character, wrattled with grief, finally trying to move on from that horrible moment of senseless violence, is forcibly dragged backwards. Six months. Six entire months happening all over again right before his eyes. Shinji gets an impossible second chance to fix what never should have happened. He knows who is going to die and he has the time to prevent it. He can change it.
But he discovers that he cannot change himself. He watches everything in horror as it happens all over again because he cannot break out of his own skin. He can't change his habits, he can't think different thoughts or change his actions, he can't seem to remember the details of that future that has not happened yet. His future self, and his future grief, is buried deep inside of him. He tries to claw his way out in any way he can, but he is trapped in the prison that is himself. He can only catch the smallest glimpses of clarity through the bars of his cell, and by then it is often too late.
When Shinji finally gets back here, to this moment, he must have repeated these words. He cannot change his thoughts, after all. So he says it and it means the same thing as before; he wants to comfort Tezuka and lend him his own determination and will to live. But there is now an additional meaning to it, isn't there? There is now a layer of despair. A part of Shinji is so, so desperate for things to change. A part of him knows that Tezuka diverted fate for his sake, and isn't that diversion a part of fate now too? Can't we change that too? Do not die when fate tells you to die. Don't do this, don't leave me again.
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vulpixisananimal · 11 hours
Text
Looping again and again...
(You breath in, and out.)
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(You're exhausted. You feel even more sick than last time. Your eyes are puffy, and theres a weight on your chest.)
(You breath in, and out.)
(Just, just focus. Just focus. None of that happened, not really. It was all in another timeline, you didn't hurt him, and you aren't selfish. You... You...)
("I should never have trusted you.")
(. . .)
(You trust them. But they don't trust you. If they don't trust you, why do you keep talking to them.)
(Because it's. . . Because I promised.)
(You promised to protect Bonnie too.)
(Your breath catches.)
(Are you sure they believe you, or like you, or trust you? Can you be sure? You have a power that they cannot comprehend. Every day could be perfectly scripted by you.)
(I. . . I don't know.)
(Do you think Isabeau trusts you.)
(I. . .)
"You alright, Sif?"
(Oh stars, right. You breath in, and out.)
"Never better, Isa!" (You said, your words ringing hollow.)
"Well, if you need a hand or, or if I need to get you anything, just let me know okay?"
(Same as last time. You are looping again, after all. You look at yourself in the mirror. Could it get worse..?)
(You setep out of the bathroom.)
"Sif! Are you sure you're alright?" (He leaned down to your level, just as worried as before.) "I was about to get out of bed and I heard you, uh-"
"I'm fine Isabeau--" >> "--Just some loopy stuff, not that bad, I'll meet you for breakfast!"
(. . . Should you be zoning out? Things are differen't now, you're not in Dormont after all.)
(It wont hurt them.)
(You're back downstairs, Mirabelle and Bonnie off doing whatever it was they do in the morning. The quesadillas looked good like last time. Hmm, you could change a few things up here at least.)
"You sure you're alright? Can't go investigating when your sick."
"I've gone through worse." (You say cheekily.)
"That's not a good thing though!" (Isa exlaimed.) "You were sick for weeks after all those loops!"
"Still hard to believe." (Nile commented, leaning back.) "Even I know you're not s'possed to be able to craft time."
"Well I didn't think wishes were so..."
"Dangerous?" (You say.)
"Well, yeah." (Isa's vision wandered, thinking.) ". . . Do you think that's why you're sick again?"
(Huh.)
(Odile looked up from her book.) "That could be it. Perhaps that wish is still allowing Siffrin to loop back, but requires more of his own energy."
"So it's, craft exhaustion?" (That would make sense, and explain why each time you looped you were feeling worse.)
"Alright eat up then 'Frin." (Nille said, leaning over to give you a second quesadilla.) "Gotta get your energy back."
(You shrink down into your cloak.) "I'll be fine, you don't, need, to."
"Come on Sif!" (Now Isa was handing you more food.) "Craft exhaustion 101! Eat! Your! Food!"
(Oh stars. . .)
(Defeated, you start to eat up. It WAS good food, Bonnie always made good food. And you WERE hungry. Plus, you might need the energy to loop again. And if you do that, then you wouldn't have taken their food.)
(Mirabelle and Bonnie join the rest of you, the air is a bit warmer than last time. Bonnie threatened to go back and make you even more food once they found out you had craft exhaustion. But for now, it's about time to explain things again.)
(You're going to? You still trust them?)
(. . . If we don't, it could be worse. We didn't ask for help before, and it was worse.)
"Isa, did you know someone called Ramos in the Defenders?"
"Huh?" (Isa thought for a moment.) "I didn't. . . Oh! Well I knew someone who's second name was that, why?"
"Taller? Wears a vest and kerchif? Short hair?"
(Isa shook his head.) "No, but I remember they asked me about some clothes like that... Wait did you-"
(You smile smugly.) "You must have had quite the impact, they look totaly different when we met them later today."
"You looped again!?!?--" >> "--I'll look for one of those next time."
(Where to start this time.)
"This will be try number three of today, First time me and Odile went to the library and the rest of you to the Defenders place, Bonnie came running to us, aparently Mira was framed for kidnapping Bonnie."
"!?!?!?--" >> "--There must have been some kind of mistake!"
"And that's why we went there last time." (You hesitate) "We all did, met Ramos at the enterance, started leading us to someone who'd help. Mira, Bonnie and Nilla ran off because of..."
(. . . Roses.)
"Beacuse Bonnie smelled mint and thought someone's roses were in trouble?"
"Huh?!?"
"It makes more sense at the moment I promise!"
"Well there was someone who kept roses." (Isa pondered.) "But he was never the type to get mints in his rosebeds."
"Well aparently Bonnie smelled mint, so."
"Was it like the sugar?" (Bonnie asked.) "Like, is it a craft thing?"
(You blink, oh.) "Well, uh, I did smell a lot of something."
(Bonnie hopped away from the tapple and ran back to the kitchen. Before coming back with a bit of a plant and held it up to you.) "Smell."
(You take a sniff, the same smell.) ". . . Is that mint?"
"Duh." (They said smugly.) "No it's cumin, obviously. Crabface."
"Language."
(You all have a bit of a chuckle. Bonnie going to put the mint back. Odile prompted you to continue.)
"Right..." (You shift a bit in your seat, oh boy.) "Well... Isa, did you get any help on your Defender quiz? Did Ramos help you?"
"Huh? No I didn't," (he looked confused.) "I did worry about it a bunch, but Ramos was having it harder, if anything I helped them."
(You nod.) "While we were walking you said the oposite, you knew eachother for a while, it all seemed... Wrong."
(You paused, thinking. Odile noticed.) "Everything alright, Siffrin?"
(You bite your lip. You, didn't want to talk about what happens next.) "Well. . . You and I got suspicious, confronted Ramos, you grabbed them and then started being weird, and uh, well, I stepped in and, well, they were wearing the star pendant."
"!!!"
"Gems alive."
"Oh Ramos.." (Isabeau pouted.) "They didn't hurt you, did they?"
(You snapped to attention, huh? What?) "I-I, n-no they, uh, no they didn't." (If anything, it was the other way around...)
"Well... If you want to talk about it."
(You shrug.)
". . . Well then what's the plan today then boss." (Nille asked, looking over she was leaning on the table so relaxed.) "Since you know the future and all."
(Boss?) "Well, I doubt this'll be the last loop, but this time we should go looking for information on what craft links to mint, if any."
"Good idea Siffrin!" (Mirabelle perked up, uhoh, she had a look in her eyes.) "Me, Odile and Isabeau will go looking for that while YOU stay here and relax!!"
"Huh?!?!"
"Agreed." (Odile was giving you a look.) "We can't have our ace in the hole burning himself out."
"That'll leave you two in charge of Siffrin then, think you can handle it?" (Isa said to Nille and Bonnie.)
(Nille gave a thumbs up) "Leave it to the sibling squad."
"Yeah!! I'm gonna make you hot chocolate too!!"
"What. Wait. But, b-but."
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(You didn't know how to respond, what was going on, you were just, just explaining what happened. It was just going to be another go around. Go look for info on mint, then, then...) "Wh, why?!?"
"Because you need!! A!! Beak!!" (Mirabelle had gotten up) "You've had to do the same day twice now and each time it was really unplesant!! And if today doesn't really happen for us, then we can do a bit extra! The other us's wont remember."
"Exactly." (Odile closed her book.) "If today doesn't matter then we can be a bit risky, and you can relax a bit more. It might help you feel better for next loop."
(You tried hiding in your cloak, a hard thing to do without a hat.) "But, you just, trust me on that?"
"Of course!" (Isabeau said, cheery.) "Why wouldn't we? I'll always trust you, Sif, because you could have done a lot of bad with being able to loop, and you didn't!" (You wince at that, Isa huffed.) "Yes, even that moment we had. I told you, it's alright."
(. . .)
(They do have a point. You, never really got a break back then either. Sure you had moments, but...)
"Ok, If you're sure..."
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remuswriting · 1 day
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MEET ME IN THE POURING RAIN; MIYA ATSUMU
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Y/N decides to walk home, even though it's pouring. Atsumu and his truck save the day.
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WORD COUNT: 1,950 words
TAGS: Feelings Realization; Friends to Lovers; Fluff; Post-Time Skip
NOTES: Do I write too much of Atsumu? I don't know and I don't care! Also, not beta-read. It's 2 AM as I post this so hopefully the amount of typos is not overwhelming
Read on AO3
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The rain is relentless against the pavement and soaks Y/N down to the bone. The nice jacket his mother bought him for his birthday two years ago does nothing to keep him dry. It’s actually just weighing him down as the rest of his clothes stick to his body. He should find somewhere dry and wait for the rain to lighten up, but he just wants to be home already.
Y/N usually enjoys his walks home from his calculus lecture. Some days he listens to an audiobook or calls Atsumu to hear about what crazy things the MSBY Black Jackals have been up to. Although Atsumu may be annoying at times, he’s a phenomenal storyteller when he wants to be, and Y/N likes listening to stories after suffering through his three-hour calculus lecture. Atsumu also loves talking, so it works out well.
His phone buzzes inside his bag, signaling he’s gotten a text, but he refuses to pull it out. The rain will just ruin it, and he doesn’t have enough money to replace it. He imagines it’s Atsumu asking if Y/N is home yet or if he’s sound shelter to wait out the storm. Atsumu prefers calling over texting, says it’s easier to say what he needs to than type it out, but he waits until Y/N calls him because Y/N likes texting more.
His phone buzzes again in his bag—several more times, actually. There’s the possibility that it may not be Atsumu texting him. It could be Osamu, asking the same questions as Atsumu while also probably questioning him if he still has enough to eat since he meal preps for Y/N.
“It amazes me ya’ve survived this long,” Osamu said one day when staring into Y/N’s bare fridge. Two days later, he brought a myriad of containers of food, all labeled of what they were and smiley faces next to the messy kanji.
Y/N has always been thankful for the meals Osamu makes him, because he knows it does take time out of Osamu’s day, (also Osamu will not let him pay him for the food—was actually insulted when Y/N mentioned it) but he’s really thankful for those meals right now. All he wants to do is shower, put on some warm clothes, and heat up some food before watching the newest J-Drama he’s found on Netflix. The rain hasn’t put him in a cozy mood, but a mood that requires a cozy atmosphere to fix.
Lightning strikes across the sky, and Y/N really should find somewhere dry, but he’s so close to his apartment. There’s no point in stopping now. In roughly five minutes, he’ll be walking up the most likely flooded steps to his apartment. That’s what he tells himself when thunder shakes the ground beneath his feet.
For the first time in 10 minutes, a truck drives by him. Well, the truck actually slows down and matches his pace. It’s really his luck that he’s going to be killed in the pouring rain. It’s probably karma from not stopping. It’d really help if he could make out what the truck looks like, but it’s raining too hard to get a clear look. However, he faintly hears the truck window roll down slightly.
“What the hell do ya think you’re doin’?” Atsumu’s familiar voice yells over the rain. Relief crashes over Y/N because that means he’s not going to be kidnapped or killed.
“Walking home,” Y/N yells back so Atsumu can hear him, and he wonders how Atsumu knew it was him. The rain is coming down too hard for Y/N to make out the faded red truck Atsumu refuses to give up. It doesn’t matter that it’s quickly becoming a piece of shit with how terrible of a driver he is, he’s attached to the damn thing. “What are you doing?”
“Lookin’ for ya, obviously,” Atsumu says, and Y/N’s heart races a little. It must be because lightning makes an appearance once again, lighting up the gray sky. “Ya’ve not been answerin’ anyone’s texts or calls.”
Y/N rolls his eyes, even though he doubts Atsumu can see him. “I’m being rained on. Why would I get my phone out?”
“Why are ya lettin’ yerself get rained on?” Atsumu asks, as if that’s the real question. “I would’ve come and gotten ya if ya just texted me.”
It’s not a confession of anything, because Atsumu tells him that all the time. He tells Y/N how he doesn’t need to be so independent and can rely on him whenever he needs to. Atsumu is just like that, though. He’s so dedicated to the people and things he cares about, and really, Y/N is amazed he’s part of the small list of people Atsumu likes enough to consider his friends.
“It’s not that far of a walk,” Y/N says, and it thunders again. A sense of reality washes over him because if he stays out in the rain much longer, he’s going to end up sick. Being sick will make Atsumu fret over him by trying to take care of him while insulting him at the same time. It wouldn’t be such a terrible thought if Atsumu wasn’t so terrible at taking care of sick people. “Or at least not far enough that I thought to bother you.”
Atsumu stops the truck, and Y/N stops as well. He could just keep walking, but he doesn’t know how Atsumu will respond to that. Maybe driving up on the sidewalk to actually stop Y/N from walking away.
“You’re such an idiot,” Atsumu snaps, and Y/N flinches a little. “Get in the damn truck so I can take ya home.”
“My clothes are soaked,” Y/N says, and he wishes he could see Atsumu. It’s hard to fully know what Atsumu is thinking when he can’t see him.
“And?  Get in the truck.”
“I’m going to get your truck all wet if I get in,” Y/N says, but he’s walking up to the door now.
“It’s already gettin’ all wet with the window bein’ down, so hurry your ass up,” Atsumu says, and Y/N grabs the door handle. His grip on it isn’t great because of how wet his hands are, but he manages to open it without issue.
Atsumu is soaked as well, which explains why he doesn’t care about Y/N’s clothes being wet. He really looks like he was nearly drowned, as if he was out in the rain for a while, but Y/N doubts he looks any better.
“Why are you soaked?” Y/N asks as the door closes. Atsumu’s hair is plastered against his head, but he still runs his fingers through it, and excess water runs down his wrist.
“I had to get out to my truck somehow,” Atsumu says, and the rain comes down harder, making the truck shake a little. “Don’t worry about me. Worry about yourself, cause if ya get sick, I ain’t takin’ care of ya.”
It’s unsaid, but they both know Atsumu will take care of him as he always does. Y/N does the same when Atsumu isn’t feeling well—physically and emotionally. They’re just there for each other in a way that doesn’t translate across the board. Because Osamu may meal prep for Y/N and Y/N may help him out in the restaurant sometimes, but they wouldn’t do the things Y/N and Atsumu do for each other. Y/N wouldn’t go over to Osamu’s house when he’s sick to take care of him, sleeping in the living room so he’s not alone for too long.
(Although, Atsumu does have Osamu. He doesn’t really need Y/N, but that’s never been talked about. Osamu just lets Y/N in and says he has to go check on his restaurant before leaving Y/N to care for Atsumu. Really, it’s a strange thing, but it’s somehow understood without saying anything.)
“Worry about yourself,” Y/N says as he rolls his eyes. “You’re more likely to get sick out of the two of us.”
“Am not!” Atsumu says as he starts driving toward Y/N’s apartment. “I’m an athlete, which means I have the strongest immune system ever.”
Y/N chuckles because Atsumu is the one who gets sick more often out of the two of them. “I’m pretty sure Sakusa-kun is the one with the strongest immune system.”
“We ain’t talkin’ bout Omi-kun,” Atsumu says, and his accent is coming out just a little more. It always does when they have these small, meaningless arguments. He’s always been one to get worked up over small things, even when he says he’s not. “We’re talkin’ bout ya and how you’re terrible when you’re sick.”
“I think you’re getting me confused with you,” Y/N says as he presses the back of his head against the headrest. A shiver runs up his spine, and he realizes Atsumu has the air on. “Why the fuck do you have the air on?  Do you want us to get a cold?
Atsumu glares at him as he turns the air off. “Is it to yer likin’ now?”
Y/N hums. “Yes, thank you.”
His apartment appears in the window, and excitement rushes through him. All he can think about are the things that motivated him to even walk in the rain, and Atsumu is an added bonus. Atsumu can take a shower too since he has clothes at Y/N’s apartment, and they’ll watch that J-Drama and eat some food together.
Atsumu’s sudden silence has Y/N look over at him, and Atsumu’s gripping the steering wheel so tightly it’s concerning. Y/N just stares at him for a moment, trying to figure out what’s suddenly brought on this behavior. Atsumu has always been someone who just says what he’s thinking or feeling, and when he doesn’t, it still shows. He doesn’t wear his heart on his sleeve; he wears it proudly on his chest for everyone to see. Y/N just catches on better than most.
“Do you want to come in?  I still have meals Osamu-kun made,” Y/N says, and Atsumu’s grip on the steering wheel loosens.
“Really?” Atsumu asks, and he sounds like an excited child.
Y/N chuckles. “Yes, really.”
Atsumu’s smile is bright and warm as they pull into the parking lot. Y/N smiles with him, and the familiar warmth he associates with Atsumu blooms in his chest. When Atsumu looks at him, it only grows to burn a little. It’s when Atsumu unbuckles his seatbelt Y/N realizes that part of him would’ve been crushed if Atsumu had said no. He would’ve understood, but having Atsumu with him will improve his mood better than any J-Drama will.
They look each other in the eyes, and Y/N gently tilts his head a little. “You didn’t get soaked just running out to your truck, did you?”
Atsumu’s smile falters slightly, as if he’s been caught, and his cheeks turn a gentle pink. Y/N nearly laughs, but he holds it in, just like he holds in the urge to run his fingers through Atsumu’s soaked hair. The brassiness in it has Y/N making a mental note to buy Atsumu more purple shampoo. After a moment, Atsumu chuckles a little.
“No, I didn’t,” Atsumu confesses before unbuckling his seat belt. “I didn’t realize the math buildin’ was so big.”
Y/N actually laughs this time. “Yeah, but next time I’ll make it easier to find me.”
Atsumu’s blush only grows to cover his entire face. “Ya better.”
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jgracie · 2 days
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wait u are a genius and i want a full explanation of ur analysis on the florida lyrics w jason
⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ FLORIDA!!! + JASON GRACE — AN ANALYSIS BY CYNTHIA
masterlist | rules
on the radio . . . florida!!! (taylor swift ft. florence + the machine)
an THANK YOU SOOOO MUCH FOR ENABLING THIS. jason might be a little ooc in this but that's just me looking deeper into his character (something mr rick riordan failed to do). also obvs im not doing lyrics that repeat twice both times LOL also sorry if this is bad these r all off the top of my head
you can beat the heat if you beat the charges too they said i was a cheat, i guess it must be true
there are many possible meanings for the first line but im choosing to interpret it like this - you can escape their criticism if you prove them wrong. this, to me, is similar to when jason came back to camp jupiter. when leo (unwillingly) fired against camp jupiter, the romans immediately began attacking. instead of fighting them himself, jason begs them to listen to him and tells them he's on their side (thus trying to beat the charges of being a traitor)
however, it didn't work and he ended up getting a brick thrown at him and passing out - "they said i was a cheat, i guess it must be true" - while taylor's saying cheat as in a cheater (romantic relationships), for jason this refers to the emotional cheating he did on camp jupiter. sure, he didn't want his memory wiped and to be placed in a whole new camp with the greeks, but he liked it, so in a way he did cheat
and my friends all smell like weed or little babies and this city reeks of driving myself crazy
we all know jason never fit in in camp jupiter. even in his pre-memory loss days, he seemed to stick out like a sore thumb (despite also being their golden child and the son of the camp's namesake). when he comes back to camp jupiter, jason feels even more left out - his friends are all either stuck in the past and incapable of growing and developing ("all smell like weed") or have moved on an extraordinary amount which he cannot keep up with ("or little babies")
as i said above, jason didn't fully merge with his fellow romans. a primary example of this is the fact that he willingly joined the fifth cohort simply to improve it, and im pretty sure he says somewhere he's always been a little more rebellious than the average roman. it also took him a lot of effort to become praetor. coming back to camp jupiter probably brought back all the judgement and criticism he received from the romans - "and this city reeks of driving myself crazy". the verb "reeks" also implies a bad smell, not a good one, so the memories are not a good kind of nostalgia
little did you know your home's really only a town you're just a guest in so you work your life away just to pay for a time-share down in destin
okay so the first part - "little did you know your home's really only / a town you're just a guest in" - again, emphasises how alone and solitary jason feels in camp jupiter. however, i'd like to bring up the fact that percy became praetor within a week (? if not less) of arriving at camp jupiter. praetor is a position which jason grovelled for for ages, only for some random greek guy to be able to replace him after one single quest. why? well, that's simply because the romans saw him as a guest, not a resident of camp or new rome - someone who is temporary and will leave to go somewhere else eventually
jason has been a member of camp jupiter since he was two. he was quite literally working his life away, work is all he ever knew since his childhood was robbed from him so quickly. he worked so hard just to become praetor and so he could make a change and maybe finally fit in with his fellow romans. however, he simply ended up with a timeshare - which (according to google) is "shared ownership of vacation property" - he and percy practically shared the position of praetor, and both saw camp jupiter as somewhere temporary (although jason realised that later on), just like how a vacation home isn't the place you're going to stay in forever
florida is one hell of a drug florida can i use you up?
for jason, florida is camp half-blood. while camp jupiter is orderly and constantly forces him into tight lines, camp half-blood allows him to express himself for who he really is and makes him feel as if he were on cloud nine (similar to how a drug makes you feel when you're high)
however, jason is still hesitant to fully commit to camp half-blood. after all, his father is jupiter, not zeus. could he really be a part of the greeks, or will they see him as foreign too? ("can i use you up?")
the hurricane with my name when it came i got drunk and i dared it to wash me away
in the song, florence welch is referencing hurricane florence, which caused major damage in south-east of the US. since jason is the son of the god of winds and sky, in a way, all hurricanes have his name since they're all semi-controlled by his father - hurricanes run in his blood. he probably sees himself as the hurricane, causing damage to both others and himself. he most likely feels like the piece of domino which started the chain of disasters he and his friends faced, since his arrival at camp half-blood is what began the second great prophecy (for them)
i'm choosing to interpret "i got drunk" as jason changing once he got introduced to the life and culture of greek demigods. he was no longer perfect, proper praetor jason grace. although it (naturally) took him some time, he became wild and carefree like them, similar to how a drunk person may act. this also ties in with the idea of camp half-blood being like a drug to him. everything about it is addictive, the more he gets, the more he wants
barricaded in the bathroom with a bottle of wine
the bottle of wine here is a symbol for camp half-blood. when jason feels unsafe, he chooses the greek camp over the roman to keep him company.
also, this lyric is reminiscent of the great war - "i drew curtains closed, drank my poison all alone" - in which taylor swift isolates herself from everyone else and dwells on the end of her relationship with her ex, which in turn makes her believe they were the bad one in the relationship. similarly, jason is often depicted as thinking about his days at camp jupiter (the few memories he can recall, at least) and from what i can remember it's never really fond. the more he thinks about it, the less camp jupiter feels like home. this reaches a climax in house of hades when he speaks to the god of the southern winds and realises he wants to stay at camp half-blood - he drank his poison and killed any tie he had with camp jupiter
well, me and my ghosts, we had a hell of a time yes, i'm haunted, but i'm feeling just fine
i think this is pretty self explanatory. growing up in the harsh environment of camp jupiter, jason has killed and witnessed death to the point where he seems desensitised to it. however, jason is soft on the inside. he puts up a facade when he's praetor jason grace, not letting anyone else see how much this affected him - "yes, i'm haunted, but i'm feeling just fine"
and your cheating husband disappeared, well no one asks any questions here
i feel like this is him talking to reyna directly (real ones know i am the biggest jeyna shipper so obviously i had to bring them up LMAO). since praetors often end up being in romantic relationships, jason was probably seen by a lot of romans (especially the more traditional ones) as reyna's husband, despite them never even dating
you can sense a bit of snark here as well with "no one asks any questions here" - again, i bring up the fact that the romans were incredibly quick to accept jason's betrayal of camp jupiter, even though he didn't, and reyna siding with them (even though she knows its not true)
a cheating husband is also mentioned in fortnight ("my husband is cheating / i wanna kill him") which i believe is reyna's song but that's a story for another day
so i did my best to lay to rest all of the bodies that have ever been on my body and in my mind, they sink into the swamp is that a bad thing to say in a song?
this is the turning point - the scene in hoh where jason makes the choice between camp jupiter and camp half-blood. he lets go of his past and everyone he knew pre-memory loss ("so i did my best to lay to rest / all of the bodies that have ever been on my body"). please keep the line "i did my best" in mind, as healing isn't a linear process and obviously there were some days where jason wanted nothing more than for things to go back to the way they were
a swamp is described as 'uncultivated', meaning you can't grow any plants in it. similarly, his relationships with the romans will never grow back as "they sink into the swamp"
"is that a bad thing to say in a song?" PURE SASS. he's mocking the ideals of romans but for once doing it without fear. he's saying sure, it might be, but do i care? no 🥰
little did you know your home's really only the town you'll get arrested so you pack your life away just to wait out the shitstorm back in texas
this is once again referencing the fact that jason was exiled from camp jupiter after his 'betrayal', even though he should be the first person they trust in a confusing time like this - discovering there are whole other counterparts of the Gods they know and love. not only because he's praetor (reyna is praetor too, after all), but because he's been at camp for the majority of his life
i need to forget, so take me to florida i've got some regrets, i'll bury them in florida tell me im despicable, say it's unforgivable at least the dolls are beautiful, fuck me up florida
again, pretty self explanatory considering the themes of drugs and alcohol i've mentioned above. jason wants to forget (haha very funny cynthia you all say in unison) anything and everything to do with camp jupiter and roman culture, so naturally, he runs to their antithesis - camp half-blood. i like to think if you played a song in his head while he was choosing between cj and chb it'd be this banger of a bridge
however, he still feels guilty. after all, loyalty is a very serious thing for romans. i think reyna tells annabeth something about how if you swear on your life and break that swear, the romans won't hesitate to actually kill you. no matter how much jason tries to pull away from roman culture, some things (like the loyalty) simply run in his blood - "tell me i'm despicable, say it's unforgivable" he wants to be held accountable by anyone, even though he knows his friends on the argo ii are the last people who'd judge him
"fuck me up florida" is jason completely succumbing to everything greek. we all know how the romans look down at greeks (prime examples being the ghosts calling percy graecus as an insult when he arrives and octavian immediately assuming the worst when the argo ii arrived). to the romans, the greeks are lousy and messy, everything they don't want to be. jason has always been this way deep down. he's willing to let the greeks completely fuck him up
love left me like this and i don't want to exist so take me to florida
love has constantly been bringing jason down. he has a big heart and yet he's lacking so much luck in that department. his relationship with reyna was completely destroyed the moment hera took his memory and put him on that wilderness school bus, and he and piper's relationship has always been awkward, ending in them breaking up and dating someone else while he was left truly alone
here, i don't think chb is florida. however, i don't want to say its elysium because that hurts. so lets just say its a magical place where everything is perfect and he can escape
(take me to) florida
i chose this specific one for the (take me to) bit, which sounds exactly like the "take me to" in the lakes - "take me to the lakes where all the poets went to die"
i don't remember if this was ever mentioned/implied anywhere in the books or if it's something my brain came up with and i accepted as canon, but jason is definitely the type of person who romanticises things he shouldn't. the lakes is one of the the most romantic places in england and is a commonly used date spot
here, jason wants nothing more than to just die peacefully (he is the poet) than have to endure any more pain and misery. what better place to die than in his florida? (i read somewhere that he was buried in cj and nothing makes me wanna kill myself more LMAO)
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theboytatu · 2 years
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@duovxq he said it during one of their fill it up episodes so i'm surprised more people didn't talk about it too.. the fact that sm left it in just makes me more confused cause his words were more serious than the official translation made it out to be
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louismygf · 1 year
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lucky again lyrics
#i love this song. i love it so so much....:(#louis said i can interpret it in anyway i want to so im interpreting it as kind of a love letter to himself#hes saying he was just a regular guy once but he was just lucky once bc of xfuk and his time in 1d#theres this maturity in there where he accepts the criticism people throw at him bc 'he must have incredible luck to get picked'...#bc ''his voice isnt that impressive or that hes not enough''#he accepts those....‚ but then he says he could be lucky again in his next endeavors. in his solo career#in fitf interviews i've noticed how he keeps saying he's ''lucky enough'' to be making the music he wants to make#to share his music without... really worrying about money or the means to make his own festival or etc#fame (and especially at the level 1d had) can really make you lose your way#louis once ''chased radio'' by following the trends‚ by having those collabs w steve & bebe#not speaking for him but im guessing those songs (or the sound at least of those songs at least) didnt make him fulfilled‚‚#but now. he figured it out‚ and he made his way back to a life he would choose.#i'm a hard man to find (meaning he lost himself along the way) but HE figured it out and he loves himself for that 😭 <- my interpretation#idk i think it's a self-love song and he's recognizing his own strength by pulling himself out of that darkness/madness#and finding clarity in how he wants to live his life or how to manage his career from now on#he dresses songs up as love songs directed to his partner so well#in this song its probably supposed to be about him & a lover getting back together but for me it feels autobiographical#the superman lyrics are really good too 😔😔😔#rrghhrgr i just think these lyrics are so good . many layers to them. it's one of the most hopeful in the album :‚)#very curious as to what louis thinks of this song and what sentiments he can share about it#oh god i havent even talked about the first verse🥺#you give and give until it's gone away. in his relationships‚ in his career‚ in 1d most especially.#i see how hard youve worked to be yourself GOD. this ties in w the negative side comments he keeps getting. way back then (xfuk) & even now#hes. just reassuring himself. it's a feel good song for himself (tbh hearing the song is so uplifting & motivating i love itttt)#YEAH ok enough. again‚‚‚ i. want to hear louis speak ab this song i hope he does somehow....‚#he accepts he was lucky for being put in a band like 1d but he also accepts and affirms the hard work he's done in his life#and that... he could be lucky again....:)#louis it's just bad luck for now 😭❤️‍🩹 you'll be lucky again !! rest up & gws‚ dont be too hard on urself ily🫶🏽#also just to be clear those critics r wrong ok sure luck was involved but what really made louis get picked is his perseverance
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n-agiz · 7 months
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my mom bought those little bis wafers as a celebratory gift ( ? ) after i told her carlos has pole position for tomorrow 😭 she doesn't even care that much about f1 but completely supports by sudden obsession and listens to my rambles happily because my grandpa was really into f1 before passing away and she likes that me and him can have that in common 🥹
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hyperfixating-rn-brb · 5 months
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The Good Omens Fandom has had a lot of fun recently with the knowledge of Aziraphale and Crowley holding hands on the bus at the end of season 1.
Soo here's everything that went through my head as I learned of it for the first time.
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For that entire scene, Aziraphale is really far gone. He's dissociating so hard he can't even realize he's been sitting on a sword. Crowley is probably the only thing keeping him grounded.
They just narrowly stopped Armageddon after a showdown with literally Satan, and still can't let their guard down. For the first time ever, they're completely on their own side. Now they have to orchestrate a body swap to save both of them. They wouldn't just be killed, they'd be completely destroyed. Everything must go exactly according to plan, but how often does that actually happen?
And on top of that, his bookshop, his home, his safe place with the demon he has to pretend not to love is burned and gone.
Crowley is so incredibly gentle and reassuring this entire scene. He's been through so much trauma himself and has spent a lot of his existence shielding the angel from it, hoping to protect some of his innocence and naivete. Crowley is absolutely familiar with every symptom of PTSD and anxiety.
Now he has to see his sweet angel see such a small bit of the horrors of heaven and hell and start to crumble inside. He's going to do his dam best to try and help Aziraphale through it. Speaking softly, ("the bookshop burned down... remember?) slowly and carefully, gradually helping to pull the angel back to reality, reminding him that he's there and will help ground him.
They get on the bus, and sit next to each other. 11 years ago, they sat nearby but separated while Crowley begs Aziraphale to help him prevent the Apocalypse. Now they are sitting together. Both an act of reassurance and unity.
Crowley sits first, Aziraphale could so easily just sit across from him, behind or in front. But he chooses to sit right next to him. And hold his hand. Aziraphale desperately needs to be near to the *former* demon he loves, to hold him, to make sure they won't be separated.
In the book, their famous lines of "none of this would have worked out if you weren't, deep down, just a bit of a good person" and "just enough of a b*stard to be worth liking" came as Satan rose from the earth, as a goodbye in case they were destroyed.
Luckily, that didn't happen and they survived. Armaggedon was stopped. But the angel is still so anxious of losing Crowley. So he chooses to reach out, to anchor himself and reassure himself that Crowley is still there beside him and that they are okay, at least for a few minutes.
And Crowley let him. He knows how badly Aziraphale needs him, he needs the angel just as much. He knows how badly he craved an anchor and support system as he was first abused and traumatized by his Fall, then further by Hell. So he's going to continue being there for Aziraphale, doing everything he can to make his angel feel safe and comfortable.
Over the next few years, Aziraphale would become so much more comfortable reaching out and touching Crowley. Leaning into him, resting a hand on his shoulder or briefly touching his chest. Somehow both reassuring himself that the former demon was still there, and reminding Crowley that he's still there for him at the same time.
Then Crowley becomes more comfortable with the touch, leaning into the angel by himself. No longer flinching at a sudden graze of a hand or reassuring squeeze.
That one moment of the two holding hands on the bus cemented so much of their relationship. "The last few years, not really..." all started on that bus the moment Aziraphale chose to sit down next to Crowley.
edited: at first this said "new knowledge" because I just found out about this all the other day, and wrote this up at 3 AM, and didn't really fact check when this knowledge became well known. I've only really been a GO fan since maybe 2021, and only really started being active in the fandom during the last few months, so a lot of info that is fairly well known is still generally new to me. soo yeah this was edited :)
source for anyone asking for it!
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weirdrandomtina · 5 months
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So, I experienced some deju vu during this scene in Trolls Band Together:
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John Dory grabs his backpack, says he's leaving (I'm done, YOLO, etc.), and then the last thing he says is "Goodbye Forever!", followed by Branch's distraught face, and the next thing Branch knows, all his brothers have left him and he never sees them again.
I was trying to figure out why that little snippet stuck with me, then it hit me:
Trolls Holiday in Harmony, when Branch is trying to figure out a gift for Poppy. He's worried about doing the wrong thing, disappointing her or freaking her out, and says "I CAN'T let that happen". He illustrates his point with Poppy packing a suitcase, and what does she say right before she runs off?
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Really brings his abandonment issues into the light😢
I've seen a few comments of people being annoyed when Branch said to Poppy "aren't you going to leave me anyway", but they clearly don't understand how trauma affects people's mental and emotional state.
He knows Poppy loves him and doesn't actually believe she'd leave, but after a lifetime of being alone, even though he's happy and loved now, there's still that subconscious fear that he'll end up alone again. Poppy means everything to him, and he can't bear the thought of losing her too, especially as a result of something he's done (his grandma died to save him, and he believed his brothers leaving was his fault because he 'ruined everything' at the concert).
Sometimes this results in Branch trying to push Poppy away, which seems conflicting, yes, but again: trauma messes with your mind. He was already heartbroken and angry at his brothers, so he wasn't thinking clearly and blurted out his hidden main fear.
And when he says "everyone else [leaves me]" I hear "everyone in my life has left me so I must deserve to be alone, so you might as well leave me too."
And that's probably why Branch was so hesitant to be open with Poppy - 1. I might scare her away, and 2. why bother expressing my feelings to someone when I'll likely just lose them anyway. Plus he's still getting used to having someone to confide to in his life. Keeping emotions bottled up for years is a hard habit to get out of.
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angelltheninth · 1 year
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Genshin men reacting to you telling them you're very horny?
One a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate your honryness? 11? Mmm, good, then you can keep up.
Pairing: Kaeya, Diluc, Itto, Thoma, Xiao, Childe, Dottore, Pantalone, Tighnari, Zhongli x Fem!Reader
Tags: nsfw, smut, fingering, teasing, hallway sex, office sex, semi-public sex, mating press, biting, marks, creampie, blowjob, outdoor sex, facial, cunnilingus, trying to stay quiet
A/N: My mind went wild writing this.
Kaeya is taken back by how blatant you are with it. Whispering it into his ear, in front of his men too, it will get a reaction out of him for sure. Good thing he's already given his speech so he can drag you into his room, kissing you and bumping into walls along the way, his cock twitching with the need to give you what you wanted. The moment you step into the bedroom its time for all clothes to go, and for you to present your needy pussy for a good fucking.
Diluc thinks he heard you wrong. You're still behind the bar, how can you be horny already? Can you really not wait. Well, only if you promise to be quiet... Luckily there's music from outside to cover the slick sounds of his middle and ring fingers pushing past your entrance and moving with the rhythm of people's clapping. Its part of his job to be sneaky, he just never thought he'd use that skill for this.
Itto gets a boner and a big dopey grin instantly. That must be why you chose so little clothes today, you wanted him to have an easier time getting you naked. He has no problem helping you out behind that big boulder. It gives him something to sink his claws onto while his huge cock sinks into your needy cunt and fills it with a warm rush of seed to soothe the ache between your legs.
Thoma looks at you absolutely stunned that you would say this while he's trying to clean the hallway. Why would you say that now? Fuck, now you've got him thinking about it too. Well he can't drop work just like that but since the floor is already wet go ahead and spread for him. You watch him get down on his knees and bury his head between your thighs, encouraging you to jump up, grip his hair and let your pretty pussy gush all over his face while you're squeezing his head with your thighs.
Xiao casually slips his hand between your this and cups your pussy. He has a very blank look on his face while he starts fingering you, your mouth falling open in both pleasure and astonishment. What? You said you were horny right? So logically as your boyfriend he will take care of your problem for you. Be quiet and let his fingers work your pussy the way only he knows how.
Childe immediately takes you by the hand, not caring at all about the looks from the fatui you're getting. His cock is already hard just from thinking about fucking you. Before he can fix your problem you need to fix his. He doesn't care if you start moaning in the hallway, he is shutting you up with his cock before you can laugh at how eager he is for this. Him? You're the one who's dripping though her panties. He's taking those just so you know.
Dottore pulls you in his lap and smirks at you knowingly. You're finally getting addicted to his cock. Good girl, good cockslut, that's exactly what he wanted in the first place. Show him. Bend over the medical table and spread your pussy lips for him, finger that needy hole and tell him just how badly you want his cock to fuck you until you're a weeping, drooling mess.
Pantalone won't drop his work just to fuck you. But you can fuck yourself in his office if you want, just stay quiet. It's not even ten minutes before your moans distract him too much, he thought he could resist but he can't, you're in his head, in his heart. Just a quickie then, a fast pump that will make you feel better until later tonight where he will take his time punishing you for this distraction.
Tighnari thought he caught scent of it earlier but honestly he thought it was his rut approaching and playing tricks on him. Good to know his nose still works fine. Do you... well... do you want it now? He can but you'll have to keep real quiet, there are rangers patrolling the forest. Turns out that he's the one who can't keep quiet, not without sinking his teeth into your neck and leaving his mark on you.
Zhongli doesn't need to be told that you're horny, he could smell it from the moment you stepped into his office. That's why he told you to lock the door. He has your pretty thighs all scratched up from the force he's using to keep you still while his cock keeps hitting your sweet spot, scraping your inner walls and him, growling into your face about how beautiful of a mate you are, what a good bride you are, how much he, a god, wants to worship that cunt of yours.
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moonit3 · 7 months
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THE CUTE GUY WITH GLASSES!
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➥ warnings/notices: yandere stuff, nsfw, m! masturbation, obsession, reader is gender neutral and is referred by you pronouns, first time writing smut, a little too short (sorry).
➥ yandere! nerd x gn! reader
➥ synopsis: simply because you smiled at him, you’ve gain his heart and attention, now he won’t let you go away.
➥ a/n: first time writing for tumblr and also first time writing smut! quite excited with this one and hopes this reach people who enjoy yandere content (^ω^)and of course, beware of the warnings too!
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the emptiness feeling inside his heart is more to question if he truly deserves to live in a world where most people are already with their beloved ones. his parents always spoken of love like it’s a magical moment in everyone’s lives, but why hasn’t he experienced it? is something wrong with him?
that question is going through his brain for the past week, and when he was almost ready to give up and preparing himself to spend the rest of his life alone, a special person entered his life, you. a lovely soul who not only is popular in the campus for both looks and charismatic personality, but the very same one who stolen his breath away just because you smiled at him.
“you are max, right?”
“y-yeah, that’s me!”
and you even know his name! mostly people just call him ‘the glass dude’, but you put extra effort to remind it. seeing how you giggled with his nervousness when he asked if you were willing to go to a nearby cafe with him before classes and when you said yes, his heart almost exploded!
our first date! max thought as he admire you drinking your favorite drink and explaining about the recently subjects you are having. of course, being considerate smart, he offered to tutor you after classes in a couple of days without nothing in return, what a lucky person you are to have someone like him~
once the day arrives, you invite max to your dorm (which you share by yourself since your previous roommate moved out), so it’s just the two of you and he can’t be more happier. with every subject he helps you, he can feel you getting closer and closer to see the details on his notebooks. luckily you can’t notice how his member is getting hard with him feeling your thigh next to his and how easily he can see that you lack a vest/bra underneath your shirt.
his mind can’t help but imagine how gorgeous you must be without any clothes on, maybe a couple of beauty marks all over or scars that tell untold stories? that’s don’t really matter as max knows it only makes you even special, yet he can’t stop thinking of the possibility of spending the night with you.
would you scream until you are completely overstimulated? or whimper with his fingers doing pleasure between your legs? the thoughts of it are plaguing his mind as he left your dorm when the tutoring session is over and once he gets to his place, an apartment that he lives on his own, max couldn’t stop touching himself.
his lewd whimpering are flying across his bedroom and he isn’t even trying to hold it back with both hands going up and down on his cock, trying to pleasure himself with the many fantasies of [name].
“ah~” a sloppy handjob is the only thing that is helping max to keep himself sane as he imagines his beloved being the one touching him, a scene that is easily imaginable. them, sitting next to his body and teasing his leaking member with their hands, almost ready to release his cum into their face. “[name]…i love you so much!”
and with a few more minutes, he was completely done and empty as his cum is all over his stomach, dirty his body and some part of his hoodie. despite his exhaustion and panting, max is willing to go for one last time before going to bed for the night, after all, he wants to fantasize about his beloved one last time for tonight.
“…next time, [name] will be here to help me with this.”
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@moonit3 writings
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