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pancake-breakfast · 9 months

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I've been chomping at the bit to get through the last few chapters of this volume, and finally, it is time!

Stream-of-consciousness thoughts for TriMax Vol. 8, Chapter 5 + Wolfwood Spinoff below.

Chapter 5: Parting Ways

Noooooo, who's parting wayyyys?? Everyone's finally set up to reunite!

LOL, the Punisher looks like it's taken some... punishment... in its fall from the ship.

They're looking for them! That's right, keep looking, guys!

OMG THEM <3 <3 <3 Protect him, Vash! Gods, he's soooo worried.

TBH, I think Vash is right to be shocked. I'd probably be shocked if I didn't Know Things. Gods, I don't wanna Know Things.

Aaand there's the vials! Drink 'er up!

STAMPEDE SPOILERS: I do think Stampede made the right choice in introducing those sooner rather than later. It doesn't destroy the tension around Wolfwood, because he's still Wolfwood and... well... yeah. Hard to get life-saving meds when you're not on great terms with the people who gave you the meds (and tend to go through it like it's candy).

And now he's providing some insight on Eye of Michael for Vash. And us. Good good good.

AND FOR ONCE NIGHTOW ACTUALLY USED THE BLACK BACKGROUND FOR FLASHBACKS. Gods, I wish he did this more often.

Awww, baby Wolfwood!

Also young Chapel, I guess, but I don't care about him NEARLY as much.

I mean, that's one way to train someone, I guess....

Ugh, poor kid. No one should have to go through this. He looks terrified, and probably rightly so.

Ah, there's the bit about his age not being what it appears to be.

He looks... I don't want to say "mournful" over what he's lost. More like he's already mourned it and accepted it as gone forever, and now there's just kind of a gaping hole in his heart where it used to be.

But there were more kids that ended up like him, most notably Livio, who Chapel seems to have recruited specifically as a "fuck you" to Wolfwood.

LOL, this is so them.

Vash in a blanket. Vash in a blanket!!! SOMEONE MADE HIM COZY!!! A:LGJA:OSDJ:FAJS:LDJ He needs to be cozy more often. He even has cozy slippers!

That's RIGHT, Knives! Stop trying to merge your being with your sisters! They'll win in the long run, 'cause they're used to being a hive mind.

Awww, Wolfwood's got a blanket, too. <3 Blankets for everyone.

The migration makes sense. Even in a world where communication isn't instantaneous, news spreads.

Yeah, Knives going after the envoy ships might not be so great.

Eyyy, it's our friend the gunsmith!

"Tumbleweed." That's a very apt name for Vash, all things considered.

Vash is sooooo happy to see him.

This guy. He's like, "My death got ruined by some jerk giving me a reason to live."

Ever-hopeful, ever-determined Meryl. <3

Marlon probably doesn't know it, but he's providing Vash with more than just a weapon here. Given how poorly their last meeting went, Vash probably expects Meryl to hate and fear him, but by telling him this story, Marlon lets Vash know Meryl still has hope in him. Enough hope to want him to be protected.

OMG, he's gonna repair the Punisher. He calls repairing the Punisher child's play. Who is this man?!

Vash, still looking tired and wan, but also looking hopeful again.

(Also, I love his floofy hair throughout this whole chapter. You can really see where Stampede took their inspiration.)

Geez, is Knives even absorbing dead Plants? This is not good. For him, I mean. It might actually work out ok for other people.

Is... is Knives trying to kill himself? Or just part of himself? The part of himself that feels sympathy for Vash despite the destruction of all the Plants? Does he even realize how many of these Plants would probably still be alive if it weren't for him "rescuing" them??

Epic Wolfwood spread! Looks like Marlon got the Punisher back in tip-top shape. (Hats off to @trigun-manga-overhaul for all their work stitching together pages like this.)

Noooooo, don't leave, Wolfwood! Vash needs you around! Have you learned nothing?? *SIGH* This means they're not gonna be getting the band back together, doesn't it.

Wolfwood Spinoff: Freed Bird

I'm glad he's free... but... I don't want him off on his own.

Ahhhh! I'd heard he whittled things but wasn't sure if it was true!

For reference, the ガタガタ (gata gata) sound on the right-hand panels is the sound of Wolfwood's knife, and the キキイイイ (ki ki-iii) sounds on the left-hand panel are bird cries.

Yeah, flying does a number on one's metabolism. There's a reason birds are poop machines. As anyone who's ever owned a bird knows.

LOL, this driver's like, "I'm glad you're an artist, but I need to get paid in cash."

I wonder where Angelina is....

Wolfwood's already making friends, I see.

Is Wolfwood blushing as he watches her?

Ah, trading women as products is common enough that she doesn't even flinch at the suggestion.

This is a shitty situation, since chances are he gets the Plant in the marriage anyway. Either way, she loses.

I'm beginning to think Wolfwood's not the "freed bird" referred to in the title.

*cue MAPPA flying bird reflected in a close-up of an eyeball scene*

Oh, no. Wolfwood has a soft spot for orphans.

Ah, seems like she's made her choice. Not because it's the choice she particularly wants to make, but because it's the only choice she knows how to make.

Haaaahahahahahaha, she thinks he got to choose his own path. He carved his road to his own path in literal bodies and blood.

I dunno, man. Different strokes for different folks. Something something "give me the freedom of the starving wolves." We all make sacrifices, and we have different opinions on what we're willing to sacrifice. I'm sure Wolfwood would prefer a life of not wandering around, wondering where his next bed and meal will come from, but he should know he chafes under collars and leashes.

You can't believe she doesn't remember you? When did she last see you??

Hahahahaha, he's so determined. He looks angry, but apparently the baby enjoys mad-dogging him back.

Yeah, she's not exactly walking here. She's not gonna remember you from that, Wolfwood!

LOL, eat the bird.

Oh, so this orphanage also adopts their kids out to actual families? Who knew? I thought they were all just Eye of Michael fodder.

Aww, toddler version of Maylene doesn't want to leave big brother Nico.

Now I'm thinking he was blushing at her not because of any attraction, but more out of pride at how much she's grown.

Oh, great. Who's this clown??

Ugh, it's the loan shark. He looks skeevy.

Uhhhh, what happened to Wolfwood? Who's this chick?

Oh, it's Maylene. She looks ready for a fight. Why was she chillin' in a dark room like that?

This panel, tho.

Why'd they beat him up?

Oh, they think he convinced her to refuse the offer? Man, this loan shark guy is dumb. I got the distinct impression she's never liked him. But of course it couldn't be because of anything he's done. It MUST be someone else's fault she's rejecting him.

Duuuuude. This guy assumes Wolfwood somehow seduced her, and he's ready and willing to kill both Wolfwood and Maylene if he did. Seems like GREAT husband material.

LOL, Wolfwood doesn't even justify his dumb-ass question with a reasonable response. You can just tell Wolfwood's head is full of murder-thoughts here.

Ah, now she's blaming him for the situation, too. Vash really has rubbed off on Wolfwood.

It's hard to tell, but I think Wolfwood is protecting her from the gunfire by keeping them both behind the Punisher.

This guy. He's got himself a tank to take out someone he thinks might be getting laid more than he is?

Wolfwood. Buddy. How dare you tell her she should have just married this guy.

Look, she'd rather die than go into a gilded cage! That's how it is sometimes! A cage is still a cage! And her purported husband-to-be is absolute filth!

Oh, good. Wolfy's coming around. At the very least, he wants to defend Maylene, and he recognizes this guy is trash. Just take a few more steps in the right direction, friend.

I get he was trying to keep her from the kind of hard life he's lived, but he's just the bird envying the person on the ground. He doesn't get that there are difficulties on both sides and you kinda have to pick your poison... if you're lucky enough to even have the choice.

He is still proud of her, despite his harsh words and narrow vision.

She may or may not recognize him, but she is aware of the impact he had on her young life.

Author Bonus Chapter

I wanna... just soak in water for a bit....

LOL, always a good plan to run away for a bit of one gets stuck being at home.

What's 1/F?

Wolfwood sure does spend a lot of time covered in blood. WHO'S FAULT IS THAT, NIGHTOW?!?!

"Silly manga" my foot... Tell that to my therapist. (Just kidding; Trigun Book Club is my therapist for this stuff. Sorry, folks!)

Archive

Trigun Vol. 1: Covers + 1-3, 4, 5-6, 7-8, 9-10 || Vol. 2: Covers + Extras, 1, 2-4, 5-6, 7-8

TriMax Vol. 1: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 || Vol. 2: Covers + 1, 2-4, 5, 6-7 || Vol. 3: Covers + 1-3, 4-5, 6-7 || Vol. 4: Covers + 1-2, 3-5, 6-7 || Vol. 5: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 || Vol. 6: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 || Vol. 7: Covers + 1-2, 3-4, 5-6 || Vol. 8: Covers + 1-2, 3-4

Extra Credit: Trigun Vol. 1: Nebraska vs. Vash's Motivations, Vash's Loneliness, Vash's Depression (pt 2 of post), Soupy Brains || Vol. 2: Coin Factoids || TriMax Vol. 1: Lina, Vash, and a Haircut || Meryl, Vash, and the Pursuit of Happiness || Vol. 5: Knives, Vash, and Hatred for Humanity || Vol. 6: Coping Series: Wolfwood, Meryl, Vash || Vol. 8: The Uncoordinated Counterattack

#side note: my family routinely gifts everyone blankets because blankets are awesome and now i have like 20 #i try to give them away when i can because no one needs that many blankets in this climate #but some are handmade and i can't bear to part with them even though they match NOTHING not even each other #trigunbookclub #trigun maximum #volume 8 #pancake thoughts

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yuukei-yikes · 1 year

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What are your thoughts on Haruaya friendship? I wish it was explored more in canon

they are so best friends and the gossipy crush talk they forced on ayano and takane in canon really truly belongs to ayano and haruka. *shakes fist* i completely agree. they deserved so much more focus together:( i understand why they didn't cuz there's a lot going on but Man what a wasted opportunity

especially post str heheheheheheheheheheh cuz i can go crazy insane in this setting god bless post str. with shintaro and takane and their fucked up insane codependency haruka and ayano understand each other's struggles a little bit. i think haruka would be the one to talk ayano into therapy LOLLLL cuz like!!! she is trying to keep herself together for her siblings bc they were alone for so long and she wants them to be able to let go and let her take care of things but girl... LIKE AYANO UM SHE IS DEPRESSED. she literally committed suicide and ya it was cuz of a plan but also *plays additional memory* and also both her parents died. like her parents are deadddd and she LOVED THEMMMM and she has to act like a big sister bc shes been away this whole time and feels like such a failure and like she abandoned her siblings and ON TOP OF ALL THIS SHE JUMPED INTO A RELATIONSHIP WAY TOO QUICKLY AND HER BOYFRIEND IS A MAJOR DICKHEAD so she kinda. feels like she has no right being upset abt the family stuff bc she truly feels like she's abandoned her siblings all this time and needs to be strong and do her part so she is like Basically the only reason i am sad is shintaro doesnt pay attention to me (it is 1000% not the only reason and she knows it). she is depressed in general, traumatized, feels like a failure of a big sister and a girlfriend. #slay

takane keeps relationship therapying her and shintaro per ayanos own request bc takane is the only one able to talk sense into shintaro when he's being a total ass which is like a weekly thing. and ayano is accidentally growing to resent takane because whyyyy is SHE the one who can talk sense into shintaro and not her. cant he see ayano is trying her best!!!!!! its not fair!!!!!!!! and she remembers all this stuff she thinks abt her being no good for shintaro bc he needs someone to drive him and how takane felt called out to the point of staying with him all that time and now it's still like this and ayanos like. ohhhh my god. what if he likes her and not me. takane is clearly better for shintaro than me. BUT ITS NOT FAIR I LIKE HIM MORE *silly girl moment* the whole thing sounds like stupid hs crush crap because thats exactly what it is minus the hs and plus the trauma so ayano also feels incredibly stupid bc she's like god there are bigger issues and im here being jealous over a boy. but she cant help it. and also its like she was rly robbed of her silly crush time because she was so busy fucking investigating her dad trying to kill her family and friends. so its like she mentally relaxed a little bit and unconsciously focusing on stupid things out of spite for this. like dammit. so what if i want to be fucking irrational and be jealous of takane. it's just such an easy feeling to feel. its so much easier to hurt over this than everything else. so she's really jealous even if its super stupid ayano is utterly jealous of takane. AND THATS WHERE HARUKA COMES IN

ayano going to haruka cuz aren't YOU jealous and haruka's like well yeah a little but lol ayano u should talk to shintaro instead of me abt this issue. and ayanos like hehe No. SIT WITH ME AND DO MY NAILS♥️ and haruka's like 😐... hehe ok😊

they kind of find this middle ground. ayano intended to go to haruka bc if anyone understands its him but haruka.... the thing with haruka is that he doesnt rly entertain the jealousy thought and he's rather like yeah this is just a very convoluted relationship dynamic all 4 of us need to work on♥️ and ayanos like EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE?!?!IN OUR QUARTET!?!? AND ITS NOT ME!?!?!??!*spirals again* and it kind of. forces her to look at things differently. i dont wanna make it sound like haruka is completely out of the unhealthy bit i could go in detail for instances where haruka shows to be pretty perceptive of the ppl around him but maybe another time. so he totally realises the dynamic going on and he talks to takane abt it but he's all like. "BUT ITS OK TAKANE I UNDERSTAND WHY ITS HAPPENING AND I JUST WANT U TO BE COMFORTABLE AND HAPPY DONT WORRY ABOUT ME OKAY BABY STEPS ♥️ how about one night you sleep over with me and the rest u sleep at shintaro's. oh you also wanna bring him over when we should be alone? THATS OKAY LIKE I SAID BABY STEPS♥️(slowly going crazy)" like he's very much aware but also a little (very) spineless and like ayano well he is also jealous at the end of the day. but unlike ayano being like WHY NOT MEEEEE WHY HERRRRRR haruka is more like. terrified of takane breaking up with him. bc he knows if it came down to making takane choose between him and shintaro she would say shintaro. he'd rather have every date with takane bringing shintaro than not have any dates at all. so hes scared that if he presses the issue takane will be like byeeeee (she wouldnt but haruka is so. yknow takane is super best friends with the dan and the whole thing with shintaro and etc and harukas like what the fuck does she see in me) (harutaka are so insane they feel so undeserving of each other but ill go on abt that probably some other time)

SO yeah he is aware but approaches the situation with painful painful painful hesitance and kid gloves which. doesnt really DO that much. like he brings it up enough that takane is aware its an issue at least but shes also so much like nahhhhhhh whaaaaat shintaro and i codependentttt naaaah ur craaaazy and harukas like haha yeah it was silly. *both know its true and sit there awkwardly* and then takane can be like yeah ok sorry we'll work on it but its difficult bc she needs the help of a third to tell her what to do very firmly like she needs haruka to be like DONT bring shintaro over or else i just wont hang out with you but ofc haruka isnt gonna do that but if takane doesnt have that she'll just keep talking herself out of the problem and haruka is completely like. YEAH ITS OK IF U SAY ITS OK (DONT BREAK UP WITH ME PLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEEE DONT DUMP ME) its also difficult to talk abt bc haruka doesnt wanna say it in front of shintaro and his ass is ALWAYS THERE

erm. oh yeah haruka and ayano. yeah they clearly find a bit of comfort in each other during this lol but what i originally wanted to go into before getting sidetracked with the shintaro and takane circus was that haruka kinda also talks ayano into talking abt her other issues about her siblings and parents bc he's like yeah all this shintaro stuff on top of all ur family stuff... and ayano's like MY FAMILY STUFF *breaks down*

because. no one else had pointed it out before. ayano thinks she is totally undeserving of mourning before her siblings can. idk if that makes sense. like ofc she can be sad but not sadder than her siblings, she has to be strong, and she feels like such a failure because her siblings are used to rock and rolling by themselves by now and shintaro wont open up to her and basically ayano is sitting there like. i need someone to need me so bad but no one seems to need me but in case anyone suddenly DOES need me then i am 1000% available. so i cant cry abt my parents clearly :3 and for haruka to casually bring up "yeah ur going through a lot with this and that" ayano feels so validated bc its truly the first time someone realises and says it and if he is saying that then it means she isnt selfish and a horrible person for daring to be sad. and she feels so ashamed bc haruka is someone she had also failed to protect back then but he comforts her and takes care of her and tells her its ok and everything she is feeling is completely valid. also they both cry together abt kenjirou bc haruka also loved him as a dad. *goes crazy*

anyways lol she starts therapy👍

they have 0 self confidence. they think they can smile their way out of emotional constipation. they can't bring up an issue without immediately chickening out. they are best friends forever.

#ask tag #headcanons #went a lil crazy with this one.#ayashin divorce #<- counts in this tag tbh

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sonjuponju · 1 year

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I posted 7,900 times in 2022

That's 4,026 more posts than 2021!

79 posts created (1%)

7,821 posts reblogged (99%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@nellipusen

@chaoticbathwater

@sunliv

@dissolvingfromsalt

@tunnaa-unnaa

I tagged 7,899 of my posts in 2022

#rb - 7,818 posts

#hehe - 4,347 posts

#cool art - 754 posts

#genshin impact - 490 posts

#finnish - 298 posts

#eddsworld - 279 posts

#arataki itto - 133 posts

#skiezrambles - 84 posts

#long post - 43 posts

#tobystuff - 40 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#i just feel like i was pulling stuff out of my ass when i was talking to her. like straight up lying and idk why i didnt realise it then lol

My Top Posts in 2022:

I DID IT I GOT HIM 😭😭❤️

2 notes - Posted January 2, 2022

guess who's a little birthday boy!! is me!!

3 notes - Posted October 1, 2022

tbh this new event made me like xiao a lot more. i just remembered him as this super angsty "nobody understands me" type, but eh, he can be reasonable too, and his past explains why he would sacrifice himself without second thought whenever a problem arises lol

but oh my GOD lemme talk about itto for a minute. holy fuck, im so happy they included him in the new event. shinobu and him were kind of oddly placed, but man am i happy they were. itto is such a skrunkle but somehow his characterization leaned a bit on the annoying side? i mean, maybe he just seemed stupider than usual when hes surrounded by people wiser than himself, but idk. it was also a bit annoying having him be the laughing stock of the team for the whole time but i guess that's his purpose as a character overall lmao

though i do have to admit!! ive never laughed so hard at the jokes in a quest before lmao. (beware - small spoiler) the part where itto tries to open the door by knocking it down when the button was right next to him was comedy gold already, but when the whole team started CLAPPING? 😭 i was HOWLING man lemme tell ya

so yeah that quest was definitely the best one ive played. not only because it included itto - ah, well, he did play a big part in it lol, but overall the quest was really really interesting. especially the ending, hoo boy, i understand now why that final cutscene got people weeping. it was so cool. i wish we wouldve seen more of the other yakshas, but oh well. im satisfied that we got like actual designs for them and not just those silhouettes from the zhongli cutscene

talking about him, im also so happy that he was included 😭 ill never get enough of him

so ya thats my thoughts on that

6 notes - Posted June 7, 2022

hi my friend is doing a survey about video games for a paper they have to write for school :D it would be awesome if you could answer it. it only takes like a minute

the survey is in the reblogs!

8 notes - Posted June 14, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

i think hayloft 2 isnt that good if you compare it to the og version. i think their record company was like "hey wouldnt it be crazy if you guys made a sequel to this massively successful song" and they were like "ok"

but on its own, hayloft 2 has me listening to it on repeat rn so... mother mother just does not miss

10 notes - Posted February 3, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #skiezrambles #long post

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risingsouls · 2 years

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🦎 + EXTREMELY predictable question from me, but what do you think makes a good transformation in DBZ- design-wise and narrative-wise?

Momo Talks About Shit So She Doesn't Fall Asleep At Work || Open!

[Gotta get the DBZ questions in and I always welcome them. Ask Nebula and Lea; I can talk about this dumbass series for hours (sorry guys).

I can't say I've given this much DEEP thought. I can say without a doubt that SS4 was the best transformation this series has done TO DATE for a million reasons, and does hit a lot of notes that i feel a good transformation in this series should. First, the look alone is TIGHT and interesting to look at. They even made it VARY for each character which I think is HELLA NEAT and just wish there was like an explanation for it (i.e. why vegeta's eyes are blue and goku's yellow? Red fur vs pink fur? Etc.). We got tails again, fur, different eye and fur colors, long hair without going overboard (don't get me wrong; i actually don't mind SS3 TOO much, but it wasn't peak transformation design by any means), and TIDDIES OUT (which isn't a requirement but I definitely enjoy that personally). It is somehow over the top while not being too much all at once and it just WORKS.

It also dove back into the roots of the Saiyan race and the Oozaru form in both appearance and lore which is absolutely *chef's kiss.* I love that the form sank back into OG Saiyan lore while offering something unique and different from what we had already seen in SS to SS3. Barring the stupid ass way Vegeta gets it (don't talk to me I will never not be mad about it ok), Goku had to get his tail back--cringe as that scene is fuck--transform into the Golden Great Ape, AND find a way to control it and harness that power to achieve a new level of power. It also didn't just fully rely on the sort of "get angy" narrative (even if it IS a little deeper than that in actuality) that had sort of driven other transformations while as I said bringing back Saiyan roots. Don't talk to me about thr U6 saiyans on this either gfdi

So, taking that as the example, I guess my answer would be a look that's more interesting than a pallette change like they have been doing with most transformations of late along with the form tying into the lore or background of the character in both appearance and how it's achieved/how it works. They kind of half ass tried the last bit with SSG by retroactively making it a part of Saiyan lore (that Vegeta didn't know but the Namekians did? Make it make sense), but it definitely just...doesn't work. Plus the ritual they have to use (which also makes no sense for Saiyans and clashes with what we know of them, which is MAYBE the point but doesn't make it cute or unique or creative) becomes obsolete by the next arc/movie so...yeah. It's incredibly flimsy and there is no real understanding of what SSG and its subsequent forms even ARE, let alone what god ki even is. Is SSG actually an inherently Saiyan form, or is it just a Saiyan that has harnessed god ki and then transformed while using it? There is nothing clearly defined about the forms (or really even UI and UE, Frieza's forms, etc.) that makes them interesting or feel fleshed out or related to the characters as a whole. It's just.. oh, he's blue now I guess? Kay.

Plus like...give me crazy shit again. Like Cooler's fifth form? Fuck yeah, cool as shit. Cell's transformations? Even clown boi is intriguing and makes you go wtf Gero? Hideous as Super "He Stole My 'Do" 13 is, it's INTERESTING (and again, wtf Gero). Even FRIEZA'S transformations were interesting and looked really neat and felt organic until its just..."lol I picked gold to mock super saiyan haha stupid monkeys" (that form looks stupid BTW Fite me). What's his excuse for Black Frieza? We gonna get edgy emo Frieza who says he chose black like his soul? Heck. I'll give them props because they KIND OF tried design wise with Ultra Ego, but it still lacks real intrigue in that department and has the same disconnect and 🤷‍♀️ feeling the rest of the newer forms have.]

#.:ask:.#.:ooc:.#viopolis #this was a fun question #im not sure how well i answered it #but the easiest way for me was to use examples and be generic #because it absolutely depends on the character in question for me to be more specific xD

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thegeminisage · 2 years

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:((( i got deathloop and almost immediately had to refund it because it kept crashing :(( i got to play a little of it and I like what I saw of Colt but yeah :(( i want to upgrade my pc at some point so after i do that, I'll probably end up buying it again. I got the first Dishonored though so I'm excited for that!!

i haven't done much of recording (besides like. a few semi-attempts to try doing lets play that never got uploaded) but I think radeon might have a 30 second clip feature? i have it on my pc, I'll double check tomorrow.

I haven't played Celeste but its on my wishlist (along with so many others 🥲) and I've heard good things about it!

anyways, i need to go to bed lol have a good day/night!! thank you for your thoughts on Deathloop!!!

NOOOOO wtf thats so sad wtf :( my pc had a really hard time running it too, i couldn't play it properly until i got a cooler (instead of a regular fan) for my birthday.

you're gonna LOVE dishonored though it is SO much fun...it's a long series (dh1 comes with multiple endings and lots of dlc, and dh2 can be played with two different characters going good or bad and with or without powers giving you a total of eight possible routes, and then doto has 2 endings as well) so hopefully by the time you're finished chewing on it you'll be able to upgrade your pc. i LITERALLY feel your pain i like couldn't run deathloop for awhile after they launched a major update in the MIDDLE of my playthrough and i was steamed as hell. i wish i could mail u the pc parts u need to get it running :(

also imo the best way to record pc gameplay is via streaming - twitch will record it and keep a copy for you that you can then download/save. but that involves doing things Publicly, so if you're just playing in private or with a friend...it can't work. i'd love to know about radeon though!! 30 seconds is what we get on switch so that's better than nothing. maybe i'll put my r*ddit account to good use finally and ask on there

ok this bit came in while i was replying and LMAO i was gonna warn you about celeste being maybe one of the top ten games ever made genuinely but also so difficult i put it down for months at a time but if you're oneshotting bloodborne bosses you'll probably beat it faster than me lol. def pick it up next time it's on sale i had such a genuine touching experience with it <3

#liz answers asks #anonymous #dl anon #is it too mean to call you deathloop anon if you can't play deathloop...what a terrible twist of fate :(#BYE have a good night

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silverdreamsstudios · 3 years

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hi my dress for my nerissa cosplay came in and i am happy lol

#ok its a bit too long LOL and also i wish the top part was sliiiightly smaller but its all good LOL #for having absolutely no clue what i was gonna get im pretty impressed #its really nice material lol #anyways i put the entire outfit together and im pretty excited LOL #ngl i rly wanna wait until the cherry blossom trees on campus go in bloom #sakura sakura #also they match my dress color hehehe #pray for good weather for me pls #LOL #anyways this was a great surprise after having to go through the biology test i spent literally the past entire week studying for like idk #it felt like i studied for about forever but i at least studied for 30 hours LOL #i can now produce a phylogenetic tree of 35+ groups from my memory in under 5 min so i'd say thats the accomplishment of this week #mod silver

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illuminiscentboba · 2 years

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HQ boys standing in front of you when you fix your top/cover period stains.2

feat: matsukawa i, yamaguchi t, sakusa k, iwaizumi h, nishinoya y, & tendou s.

genres: fluff & crack lmao <3

warnings: red stain because of period (fem reader) & a bit of angst to comfort in iwas

a/n: since I was asked to do a part two I decided to change up some of the settings and it ended up becoming more of a scenario than hcs 🤧😭😂 and so the writing style might seem a bit awkward but I might do a part 3 if anyones interested ✨

part one

YAMAGUCHI:

it was not long into practice that you were helping set up when the back strap of your top got kind of loose

You were actually here helping out in place of yachi after she asked you to help set up while she and kiyoko ran an errand and with how much difficulty your shirt gave you, you were kind of wishing you’d joined them

and so you step aside, trying to see if you could reach the back to no avail and by now the setting up was mostly done and so it wasn't surprising when a few who finished also stepped aside to wait for the other people, like yamaguchi

you made eye contact with the pinch server, and you pout until yams, who thinks you found your pouting cute, starts towards you, having noticed your struggles

when he reaches you, you start to turn but instead, he escorts you to the storage room and carefully fixes the back straps making sure they won’t come loose again "is that too tight? I can loosen it if you want!"

his seriousness makes you giggle "I'd prefer it actually hold up this time" you laughed and he nodded though you obviously couldn't see him as he tied the last knot "Actually could you make it just a bit tighter?"

soon it's secure & he gives you a thumbs up with a huge grin and he’s off to do drills :))

you were relieved it was him because he started taking favors and helping you a lot more casually than he used to and with you, he actually doesn’t end up overthinking things so much

like seeing your smile and being of help makes him feel great, like a morale boost :))

but when suga asks what you two were doing he became a nervous, flustered wreck as he quickly tried to clear up the nonexistent confusion

he tried his best 🤧😂

MATSUKAWA:

you’re waiting for the rest of the squad outside for lunch and since your a bit early, you hang out by the field when Matsukawa catches sight of you and makes his way over

but your outfit won’t give you a break, especially after the side strap comes loose when a big gust of wind ruffles your clothes

and so when you two take notice of a group of people by the field are running laps on the side, Matsukawa, the cheeky loser, steps closer to you, looking down at you with his hands on hips

“what are you doing?”

“what do you think I’m doing?” he smiles as he shifts following the runners field of vision and you realize that he's trying to cover you

when they're out of sight you stare up at him, expecting him to turn around and instead he wiggles his eyebrows prompting you to smack him

the middle blocker maneuvers out of the way last second, laughing as he did so, mirth lighting up his face as he finally turns around, broad shoulders straightened as he rose to his full height.

Though even facing you, he was solely staring into your eyes, taking in the way that you were done with his silly antics and still couldn't fight off the smile forming on your lips

its been something he's been doing for a while, always looks into your eyes and face when doing something silly (which you find attractive) to see if it’s ok lol before teasing and bullying you more than usual lol 😂😂😂

bonus: you don't tell him when your done and instead you slowly walk backwards, stifling your giggles as you watched him wait for you and his slight panic as he tries to hide you when he see's hanamaki sprinting towards him.

He does a double take when he sees you arrive with Oikawa and Iwaizumi moments later, planning his own revenge.

IWAIZUMI:

it's just another busy day at the gym as their manager and your on your period, accidentally having leaked on the bench a bit

and so when you rise to help them put away equipment, and glance behind you, you freeze in place, hurrying back to sit down to cover it again, unable to hide the panic on your face.

the coach was scolding kunimi across the gym while the head coach was discussing something with oikawa...if only you had at least a napkin...

seeing your troubled state, iwaizumi makes his way over "are you doing alright. y/n?" although it was a question, he voiced it as more of a concern. your mind goes blank, still in panic mode and your voice is low when you tell him that you "kind of had a period leak" on the bench & need tissues

The king steps out of the gym, heading for the school washroom and tucks the napkins and his sweater behind his back when he returns to not draw questions & soon the bench is cleaned up and you're off to the washroom the sweater around your waist providing your heart with a bit of comfort as you see other students leave the school

when you return with your gym pants, he convinces you to keep the sweater with you, ruffling your hair when the worried expression on your face didn't clear up

"You know, you can always go to me if you ever need something." he smiles down at you warmly, and your smiling back, touched until he decides to ruffle your hair some more, making a mess

both of you two are laughing as he sprints away and you vow revenge, tugging on the sweater a little tighter as you hurry after him.

honestly, sakusa isn't much better at helping people, especially if it requires much physical contact off the court but when he notices you struggling (whether you’re his crush or a good friend) he would sigh and pull you aside if you're in a less crowded area of the school to one of the corners you often find him in and he'd stand in front of you which he ends up doing this time

most people passing by would avoid the corner and areas by the corner because of the poor hygienic baby but this makes it easier for him as he waits for you to finish up

you can tell that this is kind of out of his comfort zone and so you wait until your done and the two of you are heading outside to tease him

he shakes his head at you, almost convincingly annoyed with you but the corner of his lip twitching upwards seemed to tell a different story

"Maybe next time I'll just steal your team sweater" "Don't even think about it," in contrast to his words, his tone is lighthearted and there's a definite curl of a smile he's failing to hide lol

"then one of your personal hoodies?" "no way"

you continue to egg him on but in all honesty, he doesn't really mind you borrowing his sweaters as long as they come back clean and you can help but feel caught up in seeing his expression relax and a rare smile on his face.

bonus: "oh right, I still have some safety pins if you need them..." it was one of the few things he kept in his locker, barely trusting the cleanliness of it even after cleaning it with cleaning supplies.

"What safety pins..." then you remember the safety pins you forced him to carry around for occasions like these

though you thought he had got rid of them like he promised he would a month ago. Your fighting off an amused smile as the two of you double back to his locker for the pins.

NISHINOYA:

Honestly your baffled when the libero seems to hover by you longer than usual during your break time like your filling your water bottle?

he offered to come with you and is milling behind you when someone goes by, and when you pick up your P.E. uniform from your locker as the other second years join you guys? he's t-posing with his legs out, heck even tanaka looks confused by his friend's actions

it when you turn around after hanging up a manager poster Yachi made and see nishinoya with his hands on his hips, his back facing you as he slowly, almost hypnotically moves in a circle much like he did with Tanaka and taketora at the training camp 🤧 that you decide it’s about time you get some answers

“Yuu, what in the world are you doing??”

”Oh, y/n! Someone spilled some cranberry juice on you, right? The stain is a bit big and I know you sometimes get worried about what other people think, so I helped you keep it a secret from everyone else.”

He's so proud of himself, almost awaiting praise but you were still stuck at the juice stain he was talking about when you realized that you had a leak

a leak that no one actually knew about because of the silly, but thoughtful libero.

It’s almost unbelievably lucky that nishinoya was the one that noticed because he’s amazing when it comes to morale support and so when you ask him to walk you/escort you to your friend because you need a tampon/pad, he didn't think twice, performing his job as your body guard perfectly

he's telling you how to get out cranberry stains on the way and your nodding along, trying so hard to keep in your laughter at how easily convinced he was that it was cranberry juice

help he’s so pure and a little gullible lmao but he really, really cares and thought that it would be something you’d overthink and didn’t want you to worry about it at all :(( he even offers his sweater and is practically sparkling when you take him up on the offer

bonus: the next day you tell kiyoko about what happens and are startled when she starts laughing at how pure and naive nishinoya is and let’s you know where she stores pads in the storage room for next time :')

long live noya and cranberry juice 😭😭😂

TENDOU:

Why do I feel like this baby would be perfect for the job?

No really though, if you were struggling with your top and asked tendou for some help I feel like he'd stand in front to cover you and offer to help you with straps you can't reach

and so when your outfit gives up on you and your holding it up, you end up approaching tendou, finding him the easiest to talk about your struggles with

he quirks his head to the side as you explain and you guys step a bit further away from the group, though when they glance over in confusion, they could make out his big smile from afar as he stands in front of you, blocking their view

he'd feel so special that you went to him for help, especially because he was standing with Ushijima & Semi as he teased goshiki when you approached him and you easily could've picked someone else

when you still seemed to have problems, he offers to fix the back straps and he actually secured them well even though he didn't get the pattern of the top lol

he even offered to get some bobby pins and sewing supplies (I feel like he picked up sewing from fixing ill-fitting hoodies so he wasn't teased at school) :(( you ask him to teach you how to sew next time and he's overjoyed to help and share this knowledge with someone :)

bonus: he literally becomes your hype man after that like any top that catches this crows attention, or looks cool and he's showing you off, sending you a thumbs up and a joking wink every now and then that you two find hilarious

reactions all within reason ofc cuz he'd never want to make u uncomfy :) tho he does show you around a lot lol since he's convinced that u look good in everything lmao 😌😂

◎ masterlists

◎ request status & inbox: open !

a/n: if the text starts duplicating please let me know ! :) & merry christmas !

#haikyuu imagines #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu!!#haikyuu hcs #nishinoya fluff #sakusa fluff #tendou fluff #yamaguchi fluff #matsukawa fluff #iwaizumi fluff #nishinoya hcs #yamaguchi hcs #matsukawa hcs #iwaizumi hcs #tendou x y/n #sakusa hcs

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kumzume · 3 years

Text

glam ft. todoroki shotō [smhub]

wc. 2.8k :3

warnings. ownership, soft-ish!dom reader, edging, v v lowkey pet play (u call him bunny lol), quiet whiny shoto, begging, miss k*nk (?), slight humiliation k*nk, crying, um

an. SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG HOLY S WORD I HOPE ITS OK I DIDNT GET ANYONE TO BETA IT SO IF THERE ARE ISSUES M SO SORRY LOVE YALL TY FOR WAITING

▼・ᴥ・▼

shoto todoroki was so pretty.

it wasn’t like he wasn’t aware — he’d heard the whispers amongst the girls back at U.A. about how attractive he was. that didn’t keep him from believing those words, his insecurities gripping him so tightly that he was unable to even imagine that anyone found him remotely appealing.

that is, until he met you.

when you first transferred into 3-A, the class was thrown into an uproar. you were beautiful, kind, and funny with a powerful quirk to boot! and yet, you never believed that you were better than anyone else, always treating every single person with respect — even bakugou (shoto couldn’t even pretend to understand how you did it but still, the behavior was so undeniably you).

it was all of your remarkable traits that ended up being shoto’s downfall. he believed you were way out of his league — you deserved someone emotionally available and sweet, things that todoroki felt, no knew, he was not. besides, with every single guy in the nearest vicinity falling for you, he knew he didn’t even have a chance.

so, shoto resigned himself to observe you from afar, watching your interactions with his closest friends and classmates, wishing that he could make you smile as wide as kirishima and deku or laugh as hard as sero and denki.

he knew he didn’t measure up and while he tried to make himself okay with that, he felt jealousy bubbling up beneath his skin when he observed shinsou helping you with your homework or bakugou training with you after school.

of course, he realized he didn’t belong to you or you to him and he had no real reason to be envious of whoever you chose to spend your time with but that didn’t stop him from fucking his hand late at night at the thought of you hovering over him, pressing soft kisses to his mangled scar and calling him beautiful.

shoto came embarrassingly quick with that fantasy, the shame and disappointment overwhelming him to the point where he’d purposefully ignored you for days after.

he could tell you were hurt by his behavior — he wasn’t entirely oblivious — but he knew it was for the best. you deserved so much more than him.

the both of you graduated and moved on to your respective agencies, shoto swiftly making his way up to the number 2 spot while you sat comfortably at number 17. neither of you saw each other very often but when you did, conversation was stilted and a bit awkward due to the intense attraction and inability to act on it on shoto’s part.

shoto was willing to go the rest of his life like this; seeing you briefly in passing, stumbling through a discussion with much difficulty, and then returning to his penthouse to hump his pillow and cry out your name.

it was a pretty good system for the most part. shoto had no worries about ever having to face his feelings for you and was content to live out his days suppressing his inner turmoil just for you.

unfortunately, the universe hates him.

at least that’s what he told himself as he stood in the center of a boardroom next to you, clad in your hero outfits and listening to instructions on an upcoming mission that required you and shoto to work together. alone. for days at a time.

what the fuck.

to be honest, shoto completely tuned out the minute he heard “one bedroom,” his mind racing with all the horribly tempting ways his fantasies could play out.

by the time the meeting was over, he was hard in his pants and entirely distracted as you attempted to make friendly small talk about your mission. shoto sort of felt like he should apologize for being an absolute brick wall, giving you curt one word answers until you decided to leave him alone.

he felt bad but what else could he do when you stood there, wearing your obscene hero costume that revealed way too much of your skin?

well, shoto was being a little dramatic but that’s how he felt! your suit was a play on the playboy bunny costume but instead of being black leather (he thinks he would actually die if you wore leather in front of him), it was a white, lightweight fabric that helped with your quirk.

it was entirely too sexy and reminded him a little too much of one of his secret kinks that he was determined to never let see the light of day.

it was going to be ok! he reasoned. all he had to do was do his job, ignore you like he’s done for the past 3 years and everything would be just fine — right?

wrong. so fucking wrong.

the mission had gone well on all accounts. you both had kicked ass, much to your enjoyment, and were able to go back home a day early!

you were so excited to finally be back in your own bed and away from the weird tension that being around todoroki brought. it wasn’t that you didn’t like him — in fact it was quite the opposite.

you found shoto alluring and gorgeous, his awkward yet endearing mannerisms drawing you further into the mystery that was shoto todoroki. regrettably, it didn’t seem like the man in question was on the same page.

every time you tried to speak with him, he would either stutter and blush or refuse to look you in the eye and give you one-word answers. it was actually ridiculously cute but he would always disappear the first chance he got.

it hurt but you weren’t one to push boundaries where you weren’t wanted.

that’s why that night, instead of going back up to the room to watch tv (uncomfortably, might i add) and knocking yourself out, you decided to go down to the bar and celebrate a job well done.

one of the perks of being a relatively unknown hero was that you could enjoy a night in public without anyone approaching you, a luxury you knew not many top 20 heroes could afford.

with that thought — and the memory of the stifling hotel room awaiting you upstairs — in mind, you made your way to the sparsely populated bar, sitting down and immediately requesting a drink (bourbon, on the rocks).

you scanned the area, counting the number of exits and patrons before your eyes landed on the handsome bartender down at the other end of the counter.

with curly brown hair, bright green eyes and a smile that could kill, there was no way you could lie to yourself and say he was unattractive. even as your mind briefly entertained the notion of taking the brunette out into the alley and fucking him within an inch of his life, your heart just wasn’t in it.

your mind just couldn’t stop drifting to the tall, dual-haired, oh so pretty, man who was (inadvertently) waiting for you upstairs. of course, you weren’t even his to wait for but you didn’t know how to keep from imagining that he was.

a deep sigh escaped your parted lips before you downed the rest of your drink, wincing at the burn it left as it went down your throat. it was getting late and you weren’t planning on spending your night alone with the janitor.

you sent the cute bartender a soft smile while pressing a crisp $20 to the counter. he sent you his own grin back as his eyes trailed down your body clad in your tight hero suit, licking his plump lips in arousal.

you were flattered, truly, but you were a little occupied with getting back to your room, changing into some comfortable pajamas and conking the fuck out.

the trip back up to your room was long and arduous to your sore body, the elevators being out of commission leaving you to take the stairs.

by the time you were at your door, you were so worn out that you were ready to collapse but before you could manage placing your key against the lock, something caught your ear.

“p-please miss,” a breathy moan of your name followed by a wet slapping noise rang out through the door. “i’ll be your perfect bunny, just let m-me cum, please-!!”

holy fuck.

shoto todoroki, the man you’d been crushing on since your years at UA was now touching himself to the thought of you doing god know what to him and he was calling you miss?

you felt heat flood your core, your knees buckling under the heavy weight of your lust. now braced against the door, you leaned your ear against the wood, determined to hear exactly what was getting him off.

more wet noises permeated through the walls — did he just spit in his palm??? — before a long whine left his pretty pink lips.

“m-miss, i belong to you, y-you own me,” he gasped, the creaking of the bed just barely audible beneath his wavering voice.

by now, you knew you’d soaked through the crotch of your hero costume, your clit throbbing painfully beneath the fabric of your panties. you also knew you should turn around, head back to the bar and order another drink, leaving shoto to finish himself off but you couldn’t.

your feet were implanted in place, ear glued against the door as you listened to your partner masturbate to the thought of you owning him.

quietly, you lifted the hand gripping your key to the door, allowing the touchpad to register before slowly pushing the door open.

the sight that greeted you was otherworldly.

the blinds were parted allowing a dreamy haze of moonlight to envelop the room, casting the pale man before you in a somehow whimsical light.

he was stripped down to nothing, lying on his back with a hand wrapped around his gorgeous, swollen cock, furiously stroking himself to completion.

the plump lips that you had spent so much time admiring were parted, allowing whines and whimpers to leave them sporadically as his lithe hips bucked up into his hand.

shoto’s eyes were clenched shut so he was unable to see your dumbfounded, painfully aroused face as you crept into the room, leaning against the wall with your hand pressed to your mouth.

it wasn’t as though you’d never seen a man naked before — you’d had your fair share of men naked in your bed begging for you — but this was something else.

this was shoto — somehow more intimidating than anyone else you’d ever brought to bed and yet you’ve never wanted anyone more.

which is why you were almost surprised at yourself when you opened your mouth and whispered, “stop.”

immediately, shoto’s eyes shot open, wide with fear and apprehension as he lied there frozen, his hand still wrapped tightly around his girth.

the both of you stood there staring at one another, neither of you able to move. you let yourself have this moment to look at him, your eyes tracking all over his muscular form before landing on his length, not missing how it twitched under your gaze.

“i-“ shoto started but he was quickly interrupted by your own voice. “s’this what you do when i’m gone? touch yourself to the thought of me? you’re so dirty bunny.”

it was impossible to hide the low groan that echoed out in the hotel room, shoto’s cheeks burning red in humiliation. a grin crept across your face as you made your way towards him, giggling to yourself at the way he moved up and away from you on the bed.

“now you’re trying to hide, bunny? you weren’t hiding when you were moaning out my name.” your hand slid up his thigh until it was resting on his sharp hipbone, an abrupt gasp leaving his chest.

your hand continued its trajectory, fingers trailing across his tummy before coming to wrap around the base of his cock.

“o-oh fuck, miss—“ a thick drop of precum leaked from his slit and onto your awaiting hand as a low moan departed from the dual-haired boy.

one of his hands shot out to hold yours, drawing your attention to his heterochromatic gaze. shoto’s eyes held so much emotion, small tears already littering his lashline while the moonlight illuminated his crimson scar. he was ethereal.

“pretty,” you hummed, giving him a gentle smile while your hand squeezed his in reassurance. you’d had enough experience to know that that kind of comment was guaranteed to get some kind of vulnerability but what you were not expecting was the expletive shoto muttered before leaning forward to press his lips to yours.

immediately, he was over-enthusiastic, his lips and teeth clashing with yours messily, almost painfully, before you took control of the kiss, slowing shoto down before slipping your tongue inside his mouth.

his quiet groan vibrated into the kiss as you deliberately laid him down, resting his back against the pillows. from there, you had more access to his body, your lips trailing down to his neck while your hand took its place back on his length, lazily pumping him up and down.

“m-miss!” shoto choked, his eyes widening yet again, holding you with his stare. you chose not to respond, instead stroking him quicker while pressing kisses to his shoulder.

“miss,” he tried again, this time more deliberately. “p-please tell me i’m yours...”

with him asking so sweetly, a few tears leaking from his gorgeous eyes at the overwhelming moment, how were you supposed to deny him?

“of course bunny,” you purred, leaning down to peck his nose, sending shivers through his body. “you are mine.”

shoto’s reaction was instantaneous. his eyes rolled back in his head and his mouth dropped open as he felt his pleasure begin to crest, determined to push him over the edge.

you, of course, noticed his body’s response and quickly pulled your hand off of him, painfully ripping his orgasm from his grasp. a disappointed whimper resonated throughout the room as shoto’s eyes found yours, staring at you with such betrayal that you almost found it funny.

“c’mon bunny,” you moved until you were kneeling between his legs, your hands leaving featherlight touches to his inner thighs. “you can hold out for me, right?”

shoto nodded before he could stop himself, desperate for anything you would give him.

besides, it couldn’t be that hard to hold off, right?

...

wrong. so very wrong.

it had only been 30 minutes but it felt like 2 hours since you started playing with him and keeping him from coming.

shoto was covered in a thin sheen of sweat, both hands tangled in his bi-colored locks, eyes squeezed shut with tear tracks now drying on his cheeks and his cock standing fully at attention.

it was purple, throbbing, and covered in precum as you licked a stripe up the side making shoto sob in pleasure.

he had never been harder in his life and he was certain that he would just die if you didn’t let him cum soon.

“p-please, please, miss, please, let me cum,” he babbled, shaking his head mindlessly while bucking his hips up into the warm heat of your mouth.

you chose to ignore his pleas while you moved your mouth over his tip, sucking hard while your hand pumped what wasn’t in your mouth.

“a-ah-!!” shoto shrieked, his back bowing off the bed, his orgasm coming on so hard and so fast that he felt like he was going to explode. “c-can’t hold back m-miss, i can’t, i can’t!”

your hand continued to pick up speed before you pulled your mouth off of him, toying with his tip while leaning up to breathe into his ear.

“cum for me bunny. you’re mine.”

with a cry of your name, shoto came, thick spurts of cum covering his abs, chest and thighs as his body convulsed under the weight of his bliss.

it was the most all encompassing orgasm he’d ever had and you, his former classmate, current partner, and future lover, was beside him through it all, helping him ride it out.

in the back of his mind, shoto knew he should be at least a little worried about how your relationship was going to change after all of this but he couldn’t bring himself to care. you were here and now, bringing him the most pleasure he’d ever undergone with nothing but kind words and a smile, filling his touchstarved heart with heat and, dare he say it, love.

shoto may not have been the funniest or the most open but you chose him, even if it was just for the night. and now that he unlocked how much he loved you, nothing else mattered — just you and him.

as he collapsed back into the sheets, his head just barely registering the cool rag wiping him down, he took pride in how he finally admitted it to himself; shoto loved you and he would be damned if he let anyone else take him away from you.

now, all he had to do was tell you but that was a conversation for another day.

▼・ᴥ・▼

taglist. if your name is in bold, i cannot tag you!!

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936 notes · View notes

mayfieldss · 3 years

Note

hey girl! how have you been?🤍

I think your requests are open. If they aren’t you could totally ignore this!

Ok so I read a similar fic a little while ago and I had an idea for a bucky x y/n and I thought you’d do amazing with this.

Tony is throwing a party and Bucky doesn’t want to go since he’ll have to socialize so he stays in his room. Some random girl comes in by mistake since she was trying to escape the party as well and they start talking. Bucky can’t stop thinking about her and then sees her again a couple days after the party and realizes she’s a new agent who’s working at the compound.

Ok that probably sounds so bad🙈 ahaha sorry! you could totally change it and do whatever you want lol

but thank you very very much!❤️✨

I love this idea so much and I just hope I did it half the justice that it deserves. I really hope you like it.

On party business - Bucky Barnes

Buckyxfemreader

Warnings: None unless you're Steve Rogers and coarse language is an issue for you.

AN: Don't mind me venting some of my social anxiety issues through this fic...

The party was loud and busy as would be expected at one of Tony Starks infamous get-togethers. You were only here because you didn’t feel like you could refuse the invite, and how many times could a person be invited to a Party by hosted by Tony Stark? So you went along, instantly regretting the decision as soon as you walked into the compound. It was packed with dancing men and women, some holding drinks while others were grinding their bodies together. Many were sitting on couches enveloped in conversations which you doubted you would be invited into. You didn’t know anyone. Finding the clearest route through the people you made your way to the Bar. There was no way you could get through this night without downing a drink first, if not two or three. Taking a seat on one of the stools you glanced around the room hoping the night would go by faster. - Bucky hated Parties. He hated how many people would surround him, ask him questions in their drunk states and caress his Metal arm with their sticky, alcohol covered fingers. There were also the ones that would avoid him completely as well. The ones that were still wary of him despite knowing he was no longer the Winter Solider. Those people were a part of his everyday life however, so he didn't mind them as much, having been accustomed to so many living in fear of him already. This in mind, it still hurt to think nobody trusted him enough to be around him. It made it so the Winter Solider was always with him, people only seeing him as his past. So Bucky didn’t leave his room. Nobody at the Party would want him there anyway, they wouldn’t miss his presence. He sat on his bed and read his books, cleaned his boots, wrote in his journal. This way nothing unexpected could ever happen. - You’d been at the party for no more than two hours and were already aching to leave. There were too many people around for your liking, none of them paying any interest in you as you stood in the corner next to the bar. Most were shitfaced drunk, you managing to stay sober despite the circumstances. You never let yourself over drink at parties after seeing some of your past friends making the most embarrassing mistakes during your high school years. Some got tattoos or had one night stands, others posted videos of themselves on the internet for all to see or sent an embarrassing message to their ex. Making a promise to yourself in high school you told yourself to never let yourself become like them. You planned to keep that promise. Pushing your way to through the crowd you made you way to one of the many staircases attempting to get away from the storm of people surrounding you. Some swore at you as you moved your way past them, holding onto the handrail for security to avoid any drama as people shoved you back. You weren’t trying to be rude but you had to get away. Once at the top you moved quickly down the hallway to the left of you, turning each doorknob you passed, looking desperately for a room that was unlocked to be your place of refuge. Five doors later and a doorknob twisted with ease allowing you entrance. You pushed the door open in a hurry, rushing into the room without so much as a glance around. Closing the door behind you you rested your forehead gently upon its wood with a sigh. You were so relived to find an escape from the over peopled space outside of this room, finally taking a breath only for it to catch in your throat at the sound of another's presence. It was the sound of a closing book, it wasn't being slammed shut but just gently closed and you could hear the pages slap lightly against each other. Your shoulders tensed and you reached for the doorknob readying yourself to leave. "You okay?" It was the voice of a man, deep and steady. Calming somehow. Slowly retracting your hand from the doorknob you turned to face the stranger of that you had walked in on. "I'm so sorry, I didn't know anyone was in here. I was just trying to get away from the crowd". Your back was pressed to the door and you hands itched to reach for the doorknob again, every part of you

wishing to get out of the uncomfortable encounter. The man gave a small awkward smile and shuffled himself to the edge of the bed he was lying on, placing his feet on the ground. He was wearing cat socks and you couldn't stop the smile forming on your lips. He looked at you confused, and followed your gaze to his feet an embarrassed blush forming on his cheeks. "I like them a lot, where'd you get them?" You asked not wanting him to feel self-conscious over something as simple as a pair of socks. He simply shrugged "Can't remember honestly". You could tell he did remember and that he probably had whole draws full of the fuzzy feet warmers but you didn't overstep any more than you already had, having been in his room and all. "I guess I should go" You point behind you to the door you were leaning against, biting the inside of your cheek anxiously. You could taste the blood in your mouth from the harsh grazing of your teeth. "I'm so sorry for bothering you". You reached for the doorknob your fingers wrapping around it tightly as you were so close to your escape. "Wait" Freezing in your place you took his words more seriously than he meant them to be. You had been so close to leaving and you contemplated pulling the door open and making a run for it. He seemed to understand your discomfort "You don't have to but if you want to stay here until the party calms down a little you can". There was a silence and you regarded his proposal before turning back around to face him, keeping a hand pressed firmly to the wood of the door. "Are you sure I wouldn't be bothering you?". The man shook his head, a short laugh escaping his lips "Yeah I'm sure. God knows I need to be more social". This made you frown, not understanding how he could say such a thing when there was a very social party right outside his door. "If you need to be social you shouldn't be out there?" You waved behind you again keeping your eyes on the man in front of you. He had bright blue eyes that seemed to stare into the deepest parts of your soul, but not in the threatening way from which it would seem. They felt safe and trustworthy. He wore a grey T-shirt over a long sleeved black thermal, jeans and of course those wonderful cat socks. He seemed kind enough and you felt your stress fade the smallest bit as you took in his features. The man with the undeniably beautiful eyes shook his head at your question "I'm not fond of crowds". You had to agree with him there. You always felt uncomfortable around masses of people especially in small spaces. You had Your social anxiety to thank for that wonderful fault. It wasn't like you could help it, You tried to but it was difficult to stand being cramped together with a bunch of strangers. "I understand what you mean" You lifted your gaze from his for a second and looked around his room. It was neat and tidy, everything organized and in its own little home where it belonged. "You are very-' you paused, thinking of a word to describe the place, "-Clean". He nodded "I've had issues with people controlling me in the past, this is just one thing I feel l can make my own". The change of tone in his voice startled you, how important this was to him and the hidden pain that appeared behind the blue eyes you had grown to adore within the short minutes of knowing him. Sliding your back down the door you sat on the floor of his room staring back at him on his bed. You couldn't deny that you didn't want to go back out into the bustling hallway filled with drunken fools. So you had made the decision and decided to stay. He looked shocked by your movements and a frown began to form on his face as he shuffled closer to the wall next to his bed. "You can sit up here if you want, I can move if you feel uncomfortable with me up here too, or I can get you a chair" He sounded so sincere and the gentleman in him pleased you. You doubted any other man you had met on this night would have been so kind but you declined his offers, already feeling like a burden in his room. "It's okay, I'm fine here". You could tell he didn't

like your answer, that he wanted to get up so you could sit on the bed or get you the chair that he suggested. You sent him a smile to reassure him you were okay where you were. After a moment of silence he spoke "So you don't like parties?" You let yourself chuckle "You could say that yeah". "Why?". It took a moment to register his question fiddling with your hands, cracking your knuckles. "Same reason as you I guess, Its hard to feel accepted around people you don't know, I feel like their judging me. It makes me uncomfortable". You had no idea why you told him that but once it left your lips you couldn't take it back. It was okay though, it wasn't as embarrassing as you thought it would be when you looked up to see his understanding eyes. "But you know people here right? Friends that know you?" His head was tilted to the side, just a little, and he reminded you of a puppy. A handsome blue eyed puppy. You shook your head "Not here no, and even if I did they wouldn't really know me" Once again you shared more than was needed but it felt so easy to say, it came out before you could think the words over and there was no shame in saying the words like you thought there would be. He didn't seem bothered by them either, more like he knew where you were coming from. "What's your name?" "Bucky". You liked that name a lot. It was a nickname obviously but it suited him so perfectly and you felt so comfortable at hearing it. It was almost indescribable, the way he seemed to be telling himself what his name was as well as you. It made you even more curious, all the unknowns about the person in front of you, Bucky, that you wanted to learn. "What's yours?" You frowned "What's my what?" as soon as the words left your lips you felt stupid, so entranced by him that you were barley thinking of the conversation at hand. A smile formed on his face "What's your name?" You could feel your cheeks burning in embarrassment and you struggled for words through flustered state. "Of course um- it's Y/n" You felt so stupid and looked down at your hands trying to seem unbothered, pretending that what had just happened never did. You had never been good at dealing with embarrassment and you chose to keep your head down whenever something embarrassing happened. That had started in high school as well. How easy it was to be teased for the smallest things had brought upon you the stress and anxiety you held with you to this very day. "I like that name" Bucky's words were gentle, as if they alone, were lifting your head up to look at him, like a gentle hand under your chin. "I like your name too". He smiled again at that and you looked back to your hands squeezing them together tightly. You wanted to ask him so many questions, keep a conversation flowing to stop the awkward silence that would soon settle in but you didn't want to seem weird in any way. You tried to think of something that related to your previous, extremely short, conversation. Something to add onto it, to get to know him better. "What's your full name? I know Bucky's a nickname" You were about to stop there, and you probably should have, but thought it best to clarify some more with what you meant "Not that I don't like the name Bucky, I love it actually, I just wanted to know". Curses flowed through your mind and anxiety followed as your words trailed off into the short silence before his response. You sounded so stupid and you cringed internally at how awkward you always were. "My names James. James Buchanan Barnes". You bit your lip as a smile formed on his, making your stomach do the smallest of flips. "Well It's nice to meet you James Buchanan Barnes". - Bucky hadn't expected someone like you to come through his door and he hadn't expected you to accept his offer to stay. You talked to him like he was a real person and you never said a thing about his arm. It was as though you barely noticed it and after twenty minutes you came to sit with him on the bed, the floor becoming 'unbearably uncomfortable' in your words. He made plenty of room and kept a

respectable distance between you, not wanting to come off like he was just trying to get in your pants, but you seemed to understand that that wasn't the case. You talked for another hour, silences between different conversations as you thought of ways to keep the discussion going. You were both as awkward as each other it seemed, and as time passed you both became more comfortable with the others presence. When you finally checked the time you were surprised to see how long you had stayed and got up fast to leave. Bucky didn't want you to go but it wasn't his place to tell you otherwise. You put your shoes back on, having taken them off earlier and headed toward the door. Turning back to him as you twisted the handle you pursed your lips with a small smile. He thought it was cute. "Thank you Bucky, for letting me stay". Bucky nodded "Maybe I'll see you around, if I'm lucky". You bit your lip one last time, a thing Bucky noticed you did, before you opened the door and left, closing it behind you. Bucky sat back on his bed a grin growing on his face at the thought of you, a complete stranger whose company he had grown to enjoy. He thought over the last thing he had said, 'Maybe I'll see you around, if I'm lucky'. Bucky wasn't ever very lucky but maybe the world would be on his side this time. Maybe he would get to see you again. - A week had passed since the party and Bucky sat with Sam and Steve at the compound. An argument had ensued as a result of this the three never being a stunning trio, mainly referring to Bucky and Sam's constant bickering. "That's not how it works! Come on side with me here Steve!" Sam looked over to their blonde haired friend who simply shrugged as a response. He was smart enough not to get caught up in sides between the two of them. Bucky opened his mouth to respond but someone over Sam's shoulder caught his eye, making him pause. "Cat got your tongue? You know I'm right Buck". Bucky simply ignored Sam's teasing, eyes locked on the newcomer to the room. A woman talking to Natasha. Her back was turned and her hair was down obscuring any possible view of her features from him. But he knew he recognized her. If only she would would turn around. It took another minute and now, curious, both Sam and Steve had moved their gazes to the girl. They didn't seem to know her and soon became bored turning back to each other and starting a whole new conversation from which Bucky ignored entirely. After a period of time that seemed to last forever, Natasha waved Him, Steve and Sam over and the closer Bucky got to the girl the more he recognized her. It was then that she turned, locking eyes with him. He could tell she recognized him just as he did her. It was you. He smiled. "Hey stranger". -

AN: Happy Bucky fic Friday!!!!

TAGLIST: @characters-deserve-better @posteyymaloney @agentsofsheilds @ladyfallonavenger @buckys2thicc @justifymyfeelings @winter-soldier-vibes TAGS:

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moonctzeny · 4 years

Text

First Times

“Jae”, you whispered, gaining his attention, “We will still be best friends after this, right?”

He pulls you closer to him, making your face rest on his naked chest. He smelled like sweat and that intense body spray, like those days he came back from his basketball practice to meet you under the treehouse. He smelled like home.

pairing: childhood friend/ceo! jaehyun x fem! reader

genre: smut, angst

word count: 6.584k

warnings: loss of virginity, then not so virgin sex lol, squirting

summary: “Jaehyun had been your best friend ever since you were 7 years old, but after a certain incident he disappears, without informing you of his whereabouts. You had come to terms with the fact that you’ll never see him again until your paths cross unexpectedly, meeting as boss and employee”

a/n: I feel like ceo! jaehyun fics are overwritten so I tried to focus more on the childhood friends to lovers aspect, giving it a little twist

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There was no way that was him.

When you were 10 years old you couldn’t wait to have your first kiss. You were plain obsessed with the romance dramas that were playing on tv, your mom complaining about having to witness the same unrealistic tropes over and over again, but you stayed frozen in front of the screen.

Why were the characters so caught up in the thought of seeing each other? Why were they willing to risk everything they had for the other person? You were curious to find out about the love the grown ups talked about, and playing mommy and daddy with the neighbor’s son, Jaehyun, wasn’t cutting it anymore.

He was waiting for you in his treehouse, preparing his toys for your playdate. A table of pots and cutlery on one side of the room and a battlefield with ships on the other. He preferred when you two dueled for the “fate of your country”, but he knew you liked to play house so he compromised. One hour of what you like and one hour of what he liked, that’s what his mom had said.

You stomped inside, your pout not matching his excited smile.

“Finally, you’re here! Can we play my games first? My uncle got me new soldiers, look!” He ran up to you, a bunch of different green miniatures in his hands. You didn’t bother to spare him a glance, too caught up in your personal drama.

“I don’t want to play games,” you whined, “I want a boyfriend!”

Jaehyun blinked a couple times, confused. “But you have one, me. I am your friend and I am a boy”

You threw your head back in frustration, groaning so loudly that the rest of the neighborhood probably heard you. “Noo it’s not the same! We don’t kiss on the lips and stuff!”

The little boy came closer to you, scowling. He was starting to get really impatient with your whining over these dramas that you liked so much. So what if you don’t kiss and stuff? It’s no big deal anyways!

He grabbed your ears, bringing you closer to his face and he gave you a small peck. Your first kiss.

“There. Will you play with me now?”

When you turned 18 you exchanged your love for dramas with a love for art. You also exchanged your calculus workbooks for oil paints and acrylics, busy with piecing together a portfolio that would get you accepted into art school. There was one thing that stayed stable in your life, however, that followed you from childhood into adolescence.

“Hey, sorry for being late, basketball practice took longer than I expected”, Jaehyun apologized and joined you at his backyard. The treehouse had gotten too old for inhabiting but the trunk you were currently lied against served its purpose as your current hangout after school.

“Hey”, you sniffled and he finally noticed how watery your eyes were. He dropped his sportsbag immediately, and sat next to you on the slightly moist grass, your arms touching.

“I’m guessing Mark denied your offer to go to the prom with you?”

You nodded, hiding your face in his embrace before he sees you crying. Being Jaehyun’s friend wasn’t always easy. His easygoing personality and good looks on top of being president of four school clubs made him one of the most popular kids in high school. You reminded yourself that he’s still the same boy you’ve always known, that you don’t have to feel threatened by the army of girls always clinging by his sides, but it was hard. It was hard to recount your rejection from this morning when he probably has never truly felt that feeling before. Even with his college applications pending, you knew he’d be successful. Any institution would be crazy to miss up on him, and the rest of the world felt that way about him too.

“I don’t wanna talk about it”, you mumble, leaning back before you stain his t-shirt even more, “Did Mina find the dress she is gonna wear after all?”

Your genuine worry for his prom date, even after your failed promposal, broke his heart. You were always so empathetic, so selfless, so nice to him. He didn’t have it in him to let you stay in your state of misery.

“Nothing”, he blurted, rushing to explain after seeing the confused look on your face, “she bailed on me last minute”.

That was a lie, but you didn’t have to know that. Jaehyun cancelling on his date would be a dick move, he knew that, but you being happy was his priority. It always has, at least as long as he was still here. “So if you didn’t mind, I was thinking we go together? As friends of course”

“Jae! I love you!”

You tackled him with a hug, the grass tickling his neck and he just laughed at the adorable screech you let out. You both stayed there enjoying the chill evening, talking about renting cars and matching outfits.

He let you rant about the dress you’ve chosen to wear and he promised to convince his parents to leave his house empty for the after party.

The prom night was the last time you saw Jung Jaehyun. There you two were, sprawled out on his bed and tired off your asses, spending what seemed like the most fun night of your life together. Your feet were in blisters from all the dancing, head spinning from the after-party vodka. Jaehyun had turned his head towards you, tie undone and staring at a piece of glitter that had fallen on your collarbone. He looked as handsome as ever in his suit, red eyes glued on you and a satisfied smile on his face.

“Your parents are gonna be so mad when they see the mess on their carpet. I told you not to get Jungwoo drunk”

Jaehyun laughed, his deep laugh reverbrating through the room. “Not if you tell them in the morning. They can’t get mad at you. You told your mom you’re staying over, right?”

You nodded, maybe shaking your head a lot longer than needed but your tipsy self wanted to make sure you got your message across.

“You know”, you started with a snicker, “she gave me like a million condoms for tonight. Probably thought I was planning on losing my virginity like any teenager with a social life”

He kept staring at you, eyes lazily taking in the sight of your pretty smile. “Yeah, same with my dad. I think that’s the only reason why they gave me the house”

You whipped your head to face him at the speed of light, mouth gaped open and staring at him incredulously. “Jae, you’re a virgin??”

It was hard to believe. I mean sure, you hadn’t had any experience in the sex department either but you were, well, you. Shy with new people, horrible at flirting and a bit standoff-ish if you were being honest. But your best friend, as likable and good looking as he was, had never been with a girl before?

“Well, yeah, I was just kinda- I was waiting for the right person, you know? Someone to make it memorable”

You sighed, relating with his words but also...

“I just wish I could get it over with”, you confess and you saw Jaehyun gulp visibly. He was glancing at the nothingness on his ceiling, lost in his thoughts.

“Yeah”

The silence lasted for a few minutes, only the distant sound of a passing police car interrupting it. He sat on his knees, the conversation sobering him up significantly. “Remember when you wanted to have your first kiss and I just did it so you wouldn’t complain about it anymore?”

You smile fondly at the memory, waiting for him to continue. There was somewhere he was getting at.

“Well, we both want to not be virgins anymore, right? So let’s just do it”

You felt an electric tension growing between you. It was like you were holding two magnets, begging to touch each other but you still held them apart, because if you let go you just knew things would never be the same again.

Jaehyun leaned in, dunking his head at the last minute and kissing your neck instead. It was tentative, a kiss that tested the waters. He was still holding back, wanting to make sure you wanted this as much as he wanted it too. You scooted closer to him, placing your legs to frame his closed knees, putting his face gently in your hands.

His pupils were dilated, shifting to a million places but your voice managed to make him concentrate to your eyes solely. You could hear his heartbeat bumping in his chest.

“Jae, I love you. You have to trust me, ok?”

“Okay” he nodded, eyes wide open and sincere, “I love you too, so much”

You kiss him finally, and the room around you spun even more. The feeling was strangely comfortable, yet your lungs were struggling to do their job. In that moment, it felt like everything in the world was the way it was supposed to be, and you two were a part of that bigger, perfectly orchestrated picture.

He grabbed you by your waist, bringing you over his lap. His fingers danced from your thighs to the zipper of your dress, the cool midnight air spreading goosebumps on your back. You help him out by pulling your straps down, staying in your strapless bra.

“If I knew what was gonna happen tonight I would wear cuter underwear”, you mutter and Jaehyun chuckles. Why did your heart skip a beat at the sound? It’d be a lie to say you hadn’t found yourself staring at your best friend a minute too long in the past, but tonight- Tonight the effect he had on you held an intensity that you’ve never felt before.

“Underwear can only help you out so much. They can’t do wonders”

“Wow Jae, way to make me drier that the Sahara desert”

He dipped back down to your throat, sucking at the soft skin over your collarbones and earning an embarassingly high-pitched moan from you. You felt him smile against your neck as he licked over the nibbled flesh in little circles, wishing he would repeat that motion on another part of your body.

“We’ll see about that”

As if he wanted to prove his point, he grinds you over his erection, lighting your insides on fire. Your dress was short, meaning that you could feel all of him-and it seemed like a whole lot- over your panties that were damping up.

“Show me your tits and I’ll show you mine”

Jaehyun laughed at your comment; ridiculous yet successful at calming his ragged breath down. The buttons of his dress shirt opened one by one, each of them revealing another inch of his smooth chest. His skin was glowing, and his abs proved that puberty was starting to work its wonders on him.

You trace your fingers over two moles on his chest, leaving soft kisses over them. You could feel his pulse on your lips, fast and pumping blood all over his body. Despite his attempts at staying collected over the loss of his virginity, you realized that he was probably as nervous and scared as you are.

“Your turn”, he whispered, bringing you back into the moment. You reach back to unclasp your bra, freeing your boobs, and a smile cracked on your lips at Jaehyun’s reaction.

He stayed frozen and gawking at your chest, hands twitching and not knowing what to do with the sight you so generously offered him. Bringing his hands into your own, you place them over your mounds, guiding him into squeezing them. He continues on his own, pinching your nipples as he leans forward for another kiss, probably to hide his evident blush from you.

The making out continued, leaving you both with only your underpants on. He places you on your back, and starts petting your clit over your panties, the motion so soft it drove you insane. Hungry for more.

You started whining, grinding forwards against his fingers and he chuckled, pulling the fabric away to leave you uncovered. The chilly air was quickly exchanged with the feeling of his warm digits, causing a different kind of shivering.

When he inserted the first finger in you, you felt like your whole body was burning up with a high fever. You’d done this again, with your ex-boyfriend in summer camp but it definitely didn’t feel as sinful and delicious and pleasureable as this. It pulled at a knot in your stomach, begging to be untangled and Jaehyun was taking his sweet time with you. Quick circles on your swollen bud and a nibble on your neck, that’s what it took for him to enjoy you shaking through an orgasm.

“Fuck, you’re so beautiful”

You looked angelic with the sweat trickling down your chest, skin glowing in the limelight and Jaehyun would just sit and stare if it wasn’t for the tent in his boxers that was screaming for attention. Pulling at the soft fabric, you sprung him free and the boldness that came when you did started to evaporate. It hit you in that moment, that he had seen all of you and now you saw all of him- yes you had been best friends for years but this intimacy was unprecedented. And you liked the feeling.

You put him in your grasp, moving your fist in a pivoting motion with his precum as your lubricant. He throws his head back with a grunt that almost made you cum a second time and urged you to pick up the pace. Unsure of what to do next, you licked your other palm and started to massage his balls hoping he liked it. He did by the sound of his moans, but stopped you abruptly, scaring you that you accidentally did something wrong in your inexperience.

“If you continue like this I’m gonna cum. Let’s do this“

You swallow on nothing and reach to your jacket on the floor for the condoms your mum gave you.

“Want a pink one? A green maybe? Blue?”, you joke and he pets your hair lovingly, looking down at you.

“Blue. Your favourite colour”

You smiled warmly at his response, satisfied with your decision to share this moment with your best friend. With someone who knew you so well.

Unwrapping the plastic, you placed the rubber over his hardness with shaking hands, following the instructions as best as you could. Jaehyun leaned down over you, planting a dozen kisses over your face as he positioned himself over your entrance.

“Ready?”

You nodded, giving him permission to dip his tip in, the first inches stretching you out nicely. The wetness caused by your orgasm helped your situation a lot, the slickness allowing him to dive a little deeper. Then, the stinging started, making you hiss and he kissed you immediately, trying to soothe you.

“I know, baby, I know. I’m sorry. We have to go through the hard part now ok?”

The nickname playing over and over again in your head gave you the patience needed to endure him bottoming out, along with the first thrusts. It was uncomfortable, but the feeling of him inside you, of the two of you coming together as one, released some chemical in your brain that made most of the pain go away. He took his fingers from your hips to gently pat away the teardrops staining your cheeks.

“That’s it baby, you’re doing so well”

His words and the feeling of his cock dragging against your walls drew a moan out of your half open mouth, the sound carrying on the air you two shared and landing on Jaehyun’s lips. There was a tension on your belly and something told you it wasn’t just physical, more like an emotional revelation, a fire already ignited but flared up by this incident. Your feelings towards your childhood friend, a love that was more than platonic.

For you, at least.

Jaehyun was young and you felt so tight around him that he didn’t take long to finish. He pulled out last minute, taking the condom out and spilling spurts of his cum all over your stomach. It earned a scowl and an eyebrow raise from you but the way he apologized, saying you “looked too beautiful to resist”, was too cute to stay mad at.

You laid back on his bed, holding hands and trying to register what just happened. The ocassional car drove by, the lights illuminating Jaehyun’s eyes that you noted were glossy. Maybe it was just as intense for him, you thought and squeezed his hands a little tighter.

“Jae”, you whispered, gaining his attention, “We will still be best friends after this, right?”

“Forever”

Forever must have a different meaning in the Jungs’s dictionary, because after that night, Jaehyun was unreachable. You tried to text him, call him, only to be ignored and faced with stupid excuses.

You thought long and hard about why your best friend suddenly decided to ghost you. Maybe he didn’t like the sex. Understandable, since it was your first time, but it’s not like you promised him a night of mind blowing love making or anything. You decided that he probably felt too awkward to talk to you after that night and you told yourself to give him some space.

Three days passed, then another, then a week and still no sign of Jaehyun. Tired of the radio silence and irritated by his attitude, you got ready to visit him at his house, confront him one-on-one.

No, you didn’t wear your favourite perfume for him. It just so happened that you chose to put on that dress he had complimented you on before. You didn’t hope for him to call you beautiful again, or have a retake of the prom night fun. The butterflies in your stomach were probably the heavy lunch you ate. Yes, it was all coincidental.

You walked down the stairs with a pep in your step, storming through your parents in the kitchen.

“And were are you going so happy, young lady?”, your dad chirps and you smile at him.

“I’m gonna go see Jaehyun real quick!”

“Real quick? To a different country? He came back already?”

You stilled at the sound of your mother’s words, confused.

“A different country? I’m going down the street to the Jungs, mom”

“Honey, the Jungs are there but not Jaehyun. He moved abroad to study Business. Didn’t he tell you?”

The ground beneath your feet seemed to melt and pull you under the third level of hell. How could he get accepted to a university and not tell you? How could he move countries and not even say goodbye? How dare he make you fall in love with him, give you the best night of your life and then leave you hanging like that?

You ran upstairs to your room, wailing in what seemed like a mixture of rage and sadness. You felt so dumb, in your sundress and shaved pussy and cute underwear you chose out for him. It was all so, so unfair and the feeling ate you alive. The feeling that you hated Jung Jaehyun.

So now, when he stands from across the room, all suited up but with the additional rank of CEO on his shoulders you couldn’t believe that it was him.

Your portfolio did get you into an art school after all, majoring in product design. Your innovative work of rebranding the latest releases, taking on the aesthetic part of the marketing, landed you a great deal in J industries. The product was good and your skills were better, so when the sales went off the roof you weren’t surprised. What you didn’t expect however, was that the boss of your boss, who was currently staring at you from across the launch party, was your childhood best friend.

Ex-best friend.

“Damn, y/n, Mr. Jung hasn’t taken his eyes off of you all night, huh?”, said Sook, the assistant marketing director who was working by your side on the project.

“Well, he should have come over and congratulate me by now. I did help save his company”

She laughed lightly, unaware for how deeply rooted your dislike for the man really was. You continue your conversation when you suddenly see her turn visibly tense, sweeping her hands on the front of her dress. Oh, you should have watched what you wished for.

“M-Mr. Jung, how are you enjoying this party? This is y/n, she did most of the designs for the campaign-”

Eyes widening in shock, you get lost in some passerbys, meddling with the other coworkers in the gathering. Sook left a little yelp when she realized you had dissolved into thin air in seconds. You could still faintly hear her apologizing merrily.

“Oh I swear she was sitting right next to me Mr. Jung”

Chatting up with friends and even strangers, you made sure you never stayed in the same place for too long. Jaehyun’s eyes were still boring holes into your face no matter where you went, a smirk plastered on his own every time he caught you checking out for him.

In a last attemp to turn invisible, you find cover on a small couch, slightly hidden by some ballon decorations and you shoved a book to your face, faking interest. But alas, a dip in the furniture next to you and the familiar woody smell soon rang a bell of danger in your head.

“You know your book is upside down, right?”

Wincing at your fatal mistake, you turn around to be faced with a pair of brown eyes you thought you’d never see again. You noticed how they’re glowing in pride and ambition and remembered how they shined that night from tears, how you tried to read through him, just like now.

“Jung. Got bored of your little staring game?”

Jaehyun had grown an inch or two since you last saw him, you notice, standing even taller in his exemplary posture. He still stuck with his long hairstyle, locks styled back sleekly and exposing his defined cheekbones. His skin was even paler than usual, glowing in the dark room. Being a CEO probably meant staying inside a lot, making tanning for his complexion almost impossible.

“Considering you applied to my company, y/n, I figured you’d come to me now as well”

Why was he using that voice around you? You‘d made fun of him numerous times in the past for that deep tone, only coming up when he was trying to woo some girl.

“I didn’t know it was your dumb company”, you start, rolling your eyes in annoyance, “I’m surprised you even remember my name”

“How could I forget the girl I went to prom with?” And took my virginity, you wanted to add but knew he censored his words on purpose. “Also, Sook mentioned your name like, five minutes ago”

“Don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about”

His silence was uncomfortable, thickening the atmosphere even more. You saw regret and guilt in his features, lips struggling to find the right words and hands fumbling with his tie.

“I know you’re mad, rightfully so. But please, come over to my place for a drink. For old time’s sake”. The deep voice was persistent and that’s when you realized that Jaehyun wasn’t a teenager anymore. So many years had passed since that summer, enough to mature you both physically and emotionally, yet the wound stung still so freshly.

“You can’t just choose when to re-enter my life so easily”, you huffed and started to walk away from him, when you felt his fingers wrapping gently around your wrist.

“y/n, please. I’ve missed you. One drink, that’s it”

It was so annoying, you thought as you entered his condo, how his dimples were still so effective at convincing you. It was quite luxurious, definitely bigger than your apartment and by the looks of the fancy furniture, his hard work as CEO surely paid off.

“You like it?”

“Not as much as your treehouse but it’s okay”, you reply him and he grins at the reminiscence of your old shenanigans as children.

“I’ll bring the wine”

You snooped around a bit more, examining the decorations of his living room. It was quite minimalistic, an abstract painting or two, a weird sculpture, no family pictures in sight. You always hated places like that, so lifeless, so impersonal. Jaehyun had too rich of a personality for that.

He sat on his leather couch, placing two glasses of white wine in front of him and motioning you to sit down as well. You took a seat as far away from his as possible and he winced at the distance you kept, now also turning physical.

Jaehyun started a conversation by asking you about your work at the company, then moving on to your personal life. You politely answered him, even joked about how single you are. He started recounting the start of his company, how he got the idea to begin from scratch and the hardships that came with it. As it was expected from the bachelor’s vibes his place emitted, CEO position didn’t allow for enough free time for him to meet someone new, let alone something serious. Your little meet up seemed to be going well. Too well to be exact. One glass down and you finally had enough of feigning ‘happy old friends catching up’.

“Why did you bring me here Jaehyun? Really bring me here”

The man sighed at your tone, running his fingers through his hair and messing their gelled-up styling. Getting up from his position, he finishes up his second glass and sits closer to you, body facing yours.

“I guess... I owe you an apology. For back then. I should have told you I’m moving abroad”

“Yes, Jaehyun, you should have. Especially after what we did before you left”

He closed his eyes in shame, glossy after he reopened them. A serious expression darkened his features, looking as solemn as that last night you saw him before his disappearance and hanging from your lips. “Do you regret it? Going through with it?”

“No”, you answer immediately, because it was the truth. All the guys you’ve slept with in your time as an adult, though more experienced than high-school Jaehyun, were missing that one factor that none other than your best friend could offer you. Connection, vulnerability, care. True love.

He sighs, once again, clearly relieved by your answer but still speaking in a bittersweet tone.

“Good, I would really hate myself if you did. I was just, so scared you’d forget about me. I had to know you’d remember me. Then you said this whole thing about wanting to have our first time and-“. You knew it was the wine in his system that caused his rambling. Jaehyun wasn’t one to stumble on his words, definitely not sentimental like that. But alcohol seemed to bring you closer when in need and at the right time so you let it, once again, and you let him finish. “-and you looked so beautiful that I couldn’t help myself. If I knew you’d grow up to look like this I would have never-“

He stopped himself mid sentence, regretting sharing more. You, however, weren’t done with this conversation yet. There were so many years spent repenting your friendship, so many questions running through your head, and you weren’t leaving this room until they got answered.

“If you didn’t want me to forget you that much then why not tell me you got accepted to a university abroad? I was your best friend!”. Your words were emotionally charged, unwillingly making your voice turn up in volume. It was as if you turned back into the little girl crying in her bedroom, finally getting the chance to say all those things she was screaming in her pillow. “I would be so happy for you, I loved you”

“Yes you did! You literally said that every single day!”, Jaehyun yelled back, startling you, “And every single time it was as if you jabbed a knife in my chest! Did you know how much it killed me? To hear this from my best friend I’d been in love with for the past 10 years?”

“You- you were in love with me?”, you ask dumbly, voice light in disbelief, a stark difference from Jaehyun’s a second ago.

He settled his breathing, hands fixing his hair once again in abashment.

“I knew that if I told you I had to go abroad you would get all sad and start crying and I wouldn’t be able to see you like that. I knew that the moment you’d tell me you miss me I would drop everything to be with you. That night that we had sex.. I didn’t plan it but I thought it would be better for you if I made you hate me. And when I saw you again today- it felt like not one day had passed since high school. I didn’t know how to approach you, what to say. I’m sorry”

You sat there in shock, connecting the dots in your brain. All the feelings you were trying to repress around him, the lingering glances and butterflies in your stomach, were reqruited all along. You knew exactly what he meant earlier, about time seeming to freeze. The way he looked at you now, all teary eyed and red and shaking was utterly and overwhelmingly the warm Jaehyun that met you every night after school. And you wouldn’t let another day go to waste.

You lean forward, capturing his lips into a kiss long overdue. It was tentative and you started pulling back when he places both hands on the sides of your neck, keeping you from letting go. His fingertips grasp part of your hair and you lean your face sideways, melting into the kiss and his touch. A lick on his bottom lip and now your tongues were touching, groaning at how much better he got at this and wanting to put his skill to better use. Tugging on his soft locks, he moans and his baritone voice made the hairs on your arms stand on edge.

You moved your hands on his chest, palming the defined muscles and deciding you wanted to treat your eyes, ripping his shirt open in one move. Jaehyun grabs the meat of your thighs, hands gripping the edge of your dress and pulling it upwards until it falls over your head. He dipped into your neck immediately, sucking and nibbling passionately right in the middle, your moans sounding breathless with the pressure he puts on your throat. Trailing down, he left a path of open mouthed kisses, now focusing on the mounds of your breasts that your bra wasn’t covering. A flick of his wrist and the piece of underwear was gone, lips surrounding your nipple, releasing it with a loud pop.

You moan out his name and his growl’s animalistic, nails digging on the softness of your hips.

“Fuck I love that sound”

He probably made it a goal to hear it again as he started kissing on your inner thighs, the bruises he left behind teasing you to the point of begging. You lift you hips to discard the skimpy underwear you chose for tonight, Jaehyun’s breath fanning your clit. A few kitten licks and your back is already lifting from the leather, his hands intertwining with yours to keep you in place.

Practice makes perfect and Jaehyun must have had a lot of it, the interchanging of sucking, licking and spitting on your pussy making you lose your mind in the most delicious way. You were in the midst of murmuring a mix of praises when he finally finds that spot that has you trembling under his tongue. Riding out your high, you grind against his face, the pleasure not leaving any room for shame. Chest heaving and vision restored, you glance down at Jaehyun, looking as irresistible as ever wiping his wet lips and chin.

You were fully prepared and willing to return the favor so you motioned him to stand up, positioning the back of your neck over the hand rest of the couch. After opening your mouth wide he got the point, quickly ridding himself off his pants and boxer briefs, spitting profanities at how hot you looked for him right now.

You were upside down, but you could very well see Jaehyun’s hard and angry cock staring back at you. You always thought that maybe, since he was your first, you might have overestimated his size in your head. But your brain apparently hadn’t manipulated that memory in the slightest because that length and grith would definitely be a challenge for you. And hell, did you want to take it on.

He pushes through your lips, and your tongue is quick to engulf him. Licking up and down his shaft as best as you could, made Jaehyun grip the couch in an effort to keep his knees from buckling from pleasure. The position allowed him to push even deeper inside you, filling up your throat. He places his fingers over the bulge on your throat, watching it itently with every move of his hips.

Your eyes teared up and your throat started to burn but the sounds Jaehyun let out with every thrust made it all worth it. He finally pulls out, a string of saliva and precum landing on your lips and he is quick to to clean you up with his fingers. Collecting the wetness, he pushes his digits inside your mouth, and something changes in his glare, eyes darkening in the most lustful expression.

“I need you inside me”, you mumble with his fingers inside of you and he nods, asking if he should go get a condom. You search through the contains of your handbag, hands trembling with the way he is pushed up agaist you, erection digging in the softness of your ass as he’s nibling the skin on your shoulders.

You handed him the square foil and as soon as he takes it in his grasp, he pushed you down to the arm rest, back against the cushion and legs in the air. Moving your hand between your legs, you distracted him by playing with your pussy, speading the juices around and pushing your folds apart to direct him to your opening.

The first thrust felt divine, thick cock filling you nicely and making your head fall back in pleasure. Jaehyun threw your legs over his shoulders, eyes glued to yours as he kissed your calves, picking up his pace. The moans started rolling off your tongue, echoing inside the big lounge and accompanied by the skin slapping sound of your bodies.

“I missed your body so much”, he muttered as he gripped your waist, setting an incredible pace that had your feet flexing. You turned your head to the side, catching your reflection on the huge window leading to the balcony. Tits bouncing, Jaehyun’s flexed arms, his dick digging inside you. What a sight.

“See something you like?”, he chuckled darkly and you smiled up at him, grazing your nails over his biceps.

“Show me something to remember you by”

Jae halted his thrusts, turning you over to your stomach swiftly, ass in the air. He kneaded his hands over your ass, giving it a little spank and spread your cheeks apart. Placing his right knee on the arm rest, he dives inside you again, and the moan you let out barely sounded like you. His cock was so deep inside you that you had to close your eyes to relish the feeling of fullness, amplified by the light pain of the stretch. Jaehyun collected your hair in his fist, pulling your upper body against his chest as he wrapped an arm around your own.

“Open your eyes. See how nicely you take my cock. Think you’ll forget that?”, he growls in your ear, thumb digging in your cheek and palm slightly muting your sounds. The dirty talk, his cock grazing against the spot that drove you crazy and Jaehyun’s godly reflection pounding the shit out of you brought you over the edge again. He didn’t let you take any time off, hips continuing to bruise against you as feverly as before, and you thought you just might combust.

“Jaehyun, p-please, it’s too much”, you plead with as much power is left in your system, and he pulls out, only to start rubbing quick circles over your clit that had you thrashing in his arms.

You melt into his arms, a pressing feeling in your belly that you had never felt before and soon you climax for the third time, droplets of cum squirting out of your pussy and dripping onto the wooden flooring.

“This is so fucking hot”, Jaehyun mutters and starts thrusting inside you, trying to coax as much cum out of you as possible.

The waves keep coming, gushing out of you every time he pulls out, until he can’t take the sight anymore, coming with a shiver and a ragged breath.

You were sweaty and exhausted, smiling faintly as he showered you with kisses.

“Let’s get you cleaned up”

You try to stand up futilely, knees wobbling and unable to keep your balance. Jaehyun chuckles at the sight but helps you up like the gentleman he is, moving you to the floor’s bathroom.

You hop in and he joins you, letting the water run down your body and helping you soap up. It was very intimate but comfortable at the same time, his gentle caresses belonging to your skin. Everything felt right.

He was occupied with running his fingers over two hickeys he had planted on you earlier when you snap him out of his thoughts, voice barely audible over the running water.

“I’m sorry you felt like you had to lie to me to go study abroad. I think it’s pretty obvious after what we just did that I liked you too, but... I still would have let you move. Force you even.”

“You’re right. I’m sor-“

“I mean it Jaehyun. I’m so proud of you”

His eyes glimmered at your praise, wet eyelashes framing them and fluttering closed as he leaned down, pressing the sweetest kiss on your lips. It left you breathless, almost hurting when he pulled back. You could kiss him forever.

“I know you said I can’t just come back to your life like that but I want to try. I’ve seriously missed you”

“How about taking me to a date tomorrow night? To catch up some more”

He grinned brightly, eyes turning into crescent moons and dimples making your heart burst.

“Wherever you want”, he promised and took a step closer to you, hand snaking down your ass and pulling you against his wet body, “And speaking of making up for lost time... How about a round two?”

#jaehyun smut #jung jaehyun #jaehyun scenarios #jaehyun angst #nct scenarios #childhood #nct smut #jaehyun nct #nct angst #ceo jaehyun

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shyneanon · 3 years

Note

There is only one bed with red

I bet you thought I was never gonna respond to this one, huh, anon? Nope! I just had to rewrite it like five million times before I felt like it was actually not terrible. lol

Hope you enjoy this even though it’s been foreeeeeever.

---

“Well. Lookit that.”

You stared at the single available bed in the single available room, pretty immaculately kept.

“There’s only one bed,” said Red, leaning against the wall. “How unfortunate.”

You stared at it for a while, then looked back at him. He was flashing his gold tooth at you in a smug grin.

Nope.

“It’s fine,” you said. “I can sleep on the floor.”

His smile vanished.

“Hey,” he said, “hold on, sweetheart. I c’n sleep on the floor.”

Actually kind of nice of him to offer, but as much as he annoyed you… no. “It’s cool, I can do it.”

“Nah, it’s gonna make me feel like trash if I letcha sleep on the floor.”

“Well, ditto.”

He grinned. “Ooh, I gotta solution. How ‘bout we both sleep on the floor?”

You held in a laugh, trying your best to give him a deadpan look. Don’t laugh, don’t laugh….

He waggled his brows at you.

And you let out a snort.

You started to set your things down and move onto the floor but Red shoved you towards the bed. “No,” he said, “I don’ wanna feel like an asshole.”

“You are an asshole,” you said.

“Sure but I don’ wanna feel like one…!”

“OK,” you said, “fine.” Whatever, his loss. You climbed into the bed and got under the covers, and you turned a bit as Red lay down on the floor.

… Dammit.

You sighed. I’m going to regret this.

“Red,” you said.

He turned with an oddly soft smile. “Yeah, beautiful?”

Your face turned warm. His nicknames are more effective than they should be. “Just get in the stupid bed.”

“Oh?” A brow rose, and the soft smile was gone. “Feeling bonely?”

“Don’t,” you said, moving over. “You just look so pathetic on the floor, I can’t do it.”

“Sure, sure.” He moved the covers aside and slid under them with you. “You tell yerself that.”

“I will shove you back onto the floor, Red.”

He shut his mouth (figuratively speaking), and you shut your eyes. He was surprisingly warm for a skeleton, perhaps due to wearing a jacket all day. Since he didn’t have the jacket on, though, you were far more aware of the fact that he was literally just… bone. You could feel his actual spine… It was kind of weird, but not weird enough to keep you up. You were just glad he wasn’t getting handsy. Though the truth was that him getting touchy hadn’t been your main concern. In reality, you tried to avoid having to share a bed with anyone. There was a, um, bad habit of yours that people had informed you of.

But hopefully you wouldn’t do anything crazy tonight.

---

Red was awoken by the feeling of something lying across his whole body.

What the hell?

He was on his side, and he attempted to push it off, but it didn’t budge. Groggy and annoyed, he awkwardly twisted and wriggled until he was on his back and could see what the fuck it was….

It was you.

He squinted, thinking he might be insane, but yeah. It was you. You were lying on top of him. A bit awkwardly, one of your legs was pointing in the direction of your side of the bed, but your head was where the crook of his neck would be, and you were breathing softly.

Red’s face lit on fire instantly.

“Sweetheart?” he mumbled, even though he was pretty sure you couldn’t hear him. When had this happened? Had it happened in your sleep? Had you done this on purpose?

You sighed in your sleep.

Oh… oh my God.

What if she likes me?

Had you instinctively cuddled up to him in your sleep because you… liked him? Or… maybe you liked his smell, or the way lying on him felt… Red was a bit embarrassed to find that he felt giddy, but the giddiness overrode the embarrassment.

“Sweetheart,” he repeated softly, gently wrapping his arms around you. You snuggled closer and he felt his soul start to hum.

We’re… so close….

She’s so cute when she’s asleep….

“You are the most adorable thing,” he said. He knew you couldn’t hear. That was the nice part; he could say whatever he wanted. He started to readjust your stray leg with his own, and his face warmed up even more when you curled your leg around his. He let out a small sound of surprise.

“Baby, you’re uncooperative…. Hah….”

Not that he, uh, minded… having your legs like this….

“Aren’t you just the sweetest,” he purred, pulling you closer. His soul was picking up. While you were asleep he felt no need to maintain his tough guy persona, so he cooed. “Yer cute as hell.”

He nuzzled you, holding you close.

He never wanted to let go….

“Don’t worry,” he said softly, lifting one finger and stroking your cheek. “I’ll keep you safe.” He closed his eyes, relishing the feeling washing over his soul while the two of you were so near each other. “Jus’ stay right here… with me, yeah?”

One hand tangled in your hair and he sighed. It was so soft…. You moved closer to him, making a soft hum, and Red’s grin widened, his soul melting into a puddle.

This was the best night of his life.

—

When your mind started to barely lift out of its unconscious state, the first thing you noticed was that it did not feel like you were lying on the mattress.

The second thing you noticed was that a pair of arms were around you. What the… Red? Why was he…

Oh. Oh no.

I climbed on him in my sleep, didn’t I?

It was a weird habit you’d never would’ve known about were it not for the unlucky victims who had told you about it. You had never woken up on top of someone before— you always woke up next to the person in the morning, in the same spot where you’d fallen asleep, and then they would tell you about how they’d woken up in the dead of night to find your entire body lying on top of them. It also apparently took a lot of effort to push you off, especially since attempts would usually result in you immediately trying to climb back onto them.

Red, uh, didn’t seem to be making any attempts to push you off, though.

“Hah, sweetie… You look so stupid when yer asleep….”

Did he know you were awake? Judging from his low volume, you were pretty sure that no, he didn’t.

His finger wiped the side of your mouth and then immediately withdrew, and you heard him laughing as quietly as possible. Yep, he was trying not to wake you up.

“Gross!” he whispered, and you heard the sound of his hand brushing against the fabric of, presumably, his clothes. “You drool in your sleep!”

More quiet laughter. If you blushed visibly you’d give yourself away, so you just buried your face in his collarbone. Embarrassing.

“... Ah… doll….”

A hand was gently placed on your back.

“I wish we could do this all the time,” he said softly. If he thought you were asleep he wasn’t saying this to flirt with you.

He meant it, then?

“Why’ve you gotta be so damn adorable, huh? M… My soul’s going crazy over here….”

A hand ran through your hair. He was being unusually gentle….

“Then again, that happens a lot when I’m with you.”

Your face got hotter; thank goodness he couldn’t see it from this angle.

His teeth pressed against your forehead. A kiss?

“I wish… I had the guts tah tell ya how I feel.”

Huh? Not… not like… romantically, right?

“You make me feel amazing. Like… really amazing, I… I dunno how t’put it in words cuz I’m real bad with words. S’why I can’ bring myself to tell you, I wanna tell you but every time I open my goddamn mouth all I say is somethin’ suggestive.”

Some silence. Should you tell him that you were awake? You were basically eavesdropping right now.

But at the same time…

“‘N, admittedly… I wish I was good fer you. Which I’m not, I’m… I’m fuckin’ me.”

Why did your heart suddenly ache?

“I’m lazy, I’m sleazy, I dress stupid, I act stupid, I can’t communicate like an adult to save my damn life…. An’ I… I’ve done a lotta bad things. Y… ya should get with some sweet guy who’s responsible ‘n shit.” He muttered: “Lookit me, fuckin’ swearing while I’m tryna talk about my feeli— Fantastic, I did it twice.”

It took all the effort you had to not giggle.

“I wish I was good for you. Ah, sweetie, I’d… I’d take such good care of you, I really would. Or, I’d try. Tryin’ is… really all I could do, t’be honest.”

Trying is all anyone can do.

“... Too bad I suck, yeah?”

Your heart ached again. Red didn’t suck, he was a good guy…. It was probably best to tell him that you were awake before he spilled any more personal information.

“You don’t suck,” you mumbled, turning your head.

“‘M sorry, dollface, did I wake you up with my rambling? I’ll be quiet.”

“No, I’ve been awake for a while.”

His whole body froze up.

“... Ya have?”

“Yeah.”

“H… How much of what I was just saying did you—“

“All of it.”

There was a long, awkward silence.

“I’m sorry,” you said, “I should’ve said something—“

“Fuck,” he said, and you lifted your head. His eye sockets were squeezed shut.

“No, Red, it’s OK—“

“No it’s not, I’ve been makin’ a sappy ass outta myself an’ now I prob’ly made you feel guilty—“

“You didn’t make me feel guilty—“

“Jus’ please don’t say that we should go on a date cuz I know you’re only doing it to make me feel better ‘bout myself—“

“Shut up, Red.”

His eye sockets opened and he looked down at you. You could see the two red lights standing out in the darkness. “... Huh?”

“Stop wallowing in self-hatred and listen to me.”

He said nothing. You would take that as cooperation.

OK, he was listening. So, uh… what should you say?

You actually didn’t know.

So you just kissed him.

Initially he just froze up, but after a moment his arms wrapped around you and he pulled you close, kissing back. W… Wow, this feels really good…. You moved into a better position and felt your hair spill down onto him.

“Sorry,” you said as the kiss parted.

“Sorry?” Red cupped the back of your head and gave you a second fervent kiss. “What the hell for? Ya just kissed me.”

“My hair is kinda touching you.”

“Oh no,” he said in monotone, “how awful. Kiss ruined.”

You snickered and leaned down to press your forehead against his. He looked up at you with fuzzy eyelights.

“I don’ deserve your love,” he said quietly. You smiled back.

“Nobody deserves love, Sans. That’s why it’s so special when someone loves us anyway.”

“You deserve love,” he said, “from somebody better than me.”

“That’s awfully vague.” You kissed his cheek. “And besides, I don’t want love from this person you call ‘somebody better than me.’”

He smiled.

“I want love from you.”

“Hah,” he said, and you saw his eyelights change… They were like hearts now. “Sweetheart, trust me, you already have all my love.”

Your face heated up. “That’s really romantic,” you told him.

“... It is?”

A giggle escaped you. “Yes, Sans.”

You kissed his nasal ridge.

“So?” you said with a smile. “You gonna ask me out or not?”

His eyelights got fuzzy again. “Ya think maybe we could go out sometime, beautiful?”

After kissing his cheek, you said, “I’d love that.”

“So, uh…” He looked at the way you two were positioned. “You think… we could do this more?”

“Absolutely.”

You lay your head down on his ribcage.

“We should fall back asleep,” you told him.

“Sure thing, angel.”

Drifting off took no time at all.

#such a classic trope #kinda tempted to do it with our boy regular sans too #I feel like the awkwardness of it would be really emphasized #or the 'oh no I like them' thing that this trope often leads to #I dunno #fanfic #fanfiction #reader-insert #self-insert #x reader #sans x reader #fell sans x reader #underfell #fluff

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birdkujapropaganda · 3 years

Text

my completely biased and official rating of every keyblade ever:

Kingdom Key: absolute classic. excellent design for the like, mascot keyblade. very simple, vaguely key shaped. i hate the mouse head though it's so stupid and makes no sense. and i hate mickey. 9/10 minus a point for the weird mickey keychain

Oathkeeper: wonderful. amazing. never boring. excellent design love the heart and wings and all the significance. and that the keychain is kairi's charm? terrific. 10/10

Oblivion: brilliant. awesome. phenomenal. again excellent design the wings and chains and purple crystal are absolutely perfect. love the crown keychain. 10/10

Ultima Weapon 1: literally just a sword with some filigree on it. nice. too much yellow and i don't like the weird cyan gradient on the guard. 7/10

Kingdom Key D: d for disgusting. i don't have any other comments i just hate it. 2/10

Keyblade of Hearts: yeah that sure is an anti-keyblade. love the simplicity and the heart in the negative space of the teeth. and that it doesn't have a keychain, that fueled a lot of theories for 12yo me 8/10

Lady Luck: i think i don't like this one bc to get it u need to use a white trinity but you can't do that until near the end and i have way cooler blades to use. the design is pretty ok, don't really get the card keychain tho. 5/10

Olympia: oh the sight of this one makes me irritated because the kh1 strategy guide uses this in one of the pictures for the fight against possessed riku. it did not help me win. and i hate short keyblades. love the clouds and columns though 7/10

Jungle King: kinda ugly but i appreciate that it looks kinda handmade. also like the butterfly keychain bc it doesn't look like it fits but it Does. also the first good alternate blade u get in the game so. 8/10

Three Wishes: not bad but it doesn't stick out to me either. also doesn't scream agrabah to me but also it does? 6/10

Pumpkinhead: NICE. very long and very cool. the teeth looks like bat wings and a pumpkin so very epic. 9/10

Wishing Star: so pointless i already have pumpkinhead. also short. cute design though i like the gears. 5/10

Crab Claw: i never used this one because it stuck out so ugly in Halloween Town </3 i love blue and crabs though so 8/10

Fairy Harp: I HATE YOU DIE. short and stupid. does NOT remind me of neverland at all. 1/10

Divine Rose: pretty nice but short and lategame. always thought its existence was kinda weird?? like thanks belle but why. i have oblivion. 7/10

Spellbinder: for some reason i really don't like it. i like blue and the circles are neat. the handle looks really painful though. 4/10

Metal Chocobo: kinda ugly lol. love the holes and chocobo keychain. 8/10

Lionheart: oh i am so biased by recoded. absolutely excellent keyblade. design's kind of weird tho where are those lions going. 9/10

Diamond Dust: so i was really confused because i thought this was khux-only or maybe bbs keyblade but apparently it's kh1 final mix only. you know what i got as a reward for fighting the ice titan? sephiroth. you know what i got for fighting sephiroth? NOTHING. it was my favorite khux blade though so grrrr 7/10

One-Winged Angel: grr bark bark final mix again fuck you. kinda weird design though like what is the teeth? a meteor? should've been a wing. nice guard though there's not enough hand room. excellent keychain obviously. 8/10

Ultima Weapon 2: very similar to the first but blue and symmetrical. very good learn from your mistakes. 9/10

Way to Dawn: YEAAAHHHHHHH BOY HERE IT IS PERFECT EXCELLENT GREAT DESIGN WONDERFUL LORE. HAS WINGS. THE EVOLUTION FROM SOUL EATER. THE LACK OF THORNS ON THE HEART. 10/10

Destiny's Embrace: very cute!! my favorite part is the name. i wish it wasn't so like. stereotypically girly though. like you look at the destiny trio's keyblades and can immediately pick out which one is The Girl's. 9/10

Star Seeker: i wanna hate it because it's mickey's/yen sid's but honestly it's so nice. the stars and moons and comets and gradients and colors... wonderful 9/10

Rumbling Rose: oof. weird and ugly and gross. keychain looks like a ladybug from far away. 3/10

Hero's Crest: bring the clouds back. i don't really get the design but i like columns. 5/10

Monochrome: super cute!! i don't like Timeless River but this fits it so well and has cute hit effect. 8/10

Mysterious Abyss: i always get this one way late in the game so it's always pretty pointless oops lol. also the design doesn't really say atlantica?? 3/10

Follow the Wind: another weird miss but i like this one more. nice wheel shaped guard, and that the keychain is a cursed coin. 6/10

Wishing Lamp: now THIS is the agrabah keyblade. very nice and elegant. looks like the palace! 7/10

Decisive Pumpkin: THIS ONE 😭😭 it's so ugly but it's so strong so i have to use it but it's so ugly. it does look like jack's idea of christmas so points i guess 😭 4/10

Circle of Life: also pretty ugly. and short. sorry simba. 3/10

Sweet Memories: shrek voice it doesn't even have attack. i don't like winnie the pooh so that's definitely influencing me. makes cute noises iirc and looks pretty cute. 4/10

Photon Debugger: this one should look pretty cool but my brain is saying it's bad. i think the giant red ball by the teeth are throwing me off. love the neon blue tho 5/10

Gull Wing: why the weird space in the name. anyway. i really want to love this keyblade bc i love X2 but it's really bad. i'm so sorry YRP kh did you so wrong. excellent keychain choice though. 2/10

Guardian's Soul: MUCH better thank you. auron my beloved <3 the lines are very appealing and i like how simple it appears. also looks like auron's swords. 8/10

Sleeping Lion: wayyy better than lionheart. looks kinda like a gunblade! again though what are those lions doing. 8/10

Fenrir: my car key got in a fight. 1/10

Bond of Flame: looks like a bad first draft of axel's keyblade. either the teeth or the guard should look like a chakram, pick one. love it though. 7/10

Two Become One: MY BELOVED <3 excellent design, so so so roxas i think he should use it. very excellent i love the little twist at the top. checkered handle is a little weird. 10/10

Fatal Crest: lol i was so mad when i first saw this because it looked like one of my oc's keyblades. i like it now though, it's a dragon!! pretty neat bro 8/10

Winner's Proof: oh this one is so cute. if it wasn't a reward it would be really weird and bad. surprisingly elegant! and there's even 13 mushrooms on it! 9/10

(shoutout to portadorx on deviantart for the 358 keyblade refs)

Missing Ache: YOU. interesting design, though it says roxas more than ventus to me. great first alt keyblade. 7/10

Ominous Blight: very edgy names in this game <3 looks like guardian's soul, which is interesting. i don't like yellow but it works bc blight 6/10

Abaddon Plasma: what a cool fucking name. so many yellow keyblades. but very cool looking i love roxas' aesthetic 8/10

Pain of Solitude: this is just pink missing ache. 8/10

Sign of Innocence: SO COOL. idk what's going on in most of these blades but i love it. 9/10

Crown of Guilt: come on. it doesn't look like a crown. big disappointment. very cool though 6/10

Abyssal Tide: so cool!! i love blue and fighting in midair <3 the teeth kinda looks like waves 8/10

Leviathan: weirdly furry looking. very cool guard 6/10

True Light's Flight: looks like two become one if it was only one. the top kinda looks like the nobody sigil 9/10

Rejection of Fate: SPEAR. epic name too, but i think it should swap names with true light's flight. very cool but i don't remember seeing it in name. kinda awkward bc it looks like it should be a spear 7/10

Midnight Roar: sooo cool. the orange handle pops without looking wrong... nice. also the teeth kinda look like a bat. 9/10

Glimpse of Darkness: ugly. weirdly bulky and hollow. short. 3/10

Total Eclipse: weirdly bumpy sword. i like how the orange looks like it glows. 5/10

Silent Dirge: GoD but purple. 2/10

Lunar Eclipse: TE but purple. 4/10

Darker than Dark: Hello 😳TLF but purple 10/10

Astral Blast: Abyssal Tide but yellow. interesting choice, but kinda clashes with the blue accents 7/10

Maverick Flare: Ominous Blight but red... excellent. very nice. 8/10

Twilight Blaze: Abaddon Plasma but red... also excellent. very epic. 9/10

Omega Weapon: props for not looking like any of the ultima weapons. very interesting and spiky but i kinda don't like it. 6/10

Aubade: kinda weird. "draws forth its wielder's personality"... ok. looks light elemented. 7/10

Wooden Stick: lol 10/10

Umbrella: not what i would've chosen but lol 10/10

Zero/One: WONDERFUL, EXCELLENT, AMAZING. i can't really explain why i love this one so much it's just very good. 10/10

Earthshaker: very solid design. not much to say it's just nice. love the colored guard. 7/10

Ends of the Earth: love that it is so clearly an earthshake upgrade. makes u realize how incomplete the first one is. 9/10

Dreadgnaw: kinda silly looking lol those are teeth. love the red bit in the center. looks very similar to earthshaker in a good way. 8/10

Chaos Ripper: looks like EotE but in a bad way. i don't like the weird teeth. it's also almost impractically long but i'm here for that. ALSO THE EYE. NICE. 7/10

Rainfell: oooo i love this it's so simple but so nice. very elegant 9/10

Stormfall: less nice. looks like a rainfell upgrade though. also kinda looks like master's defender which makes sense but i don't like it. 6/10

Brightcrest: GORGEOUS. PERFECT AND WONDERFUL. SO PRETTY. i wish it was kairi's. kinda looks to ornamental for aqua? but good for her. 10/10

Wayward Wind: none of ventus' blades look very ventusy to me. this one looks like an extra training one they had sitting around. cool shape though 5/10

Frolic Flame: NICE. looks like lea's frisbees! i like fire and fire designs so but it's a little awkward looking 8/10

Lost Memory: ok so first off WINGS. EXCELLENT. love that the only color is the heart. very cool and epic but i don't understand why it doesn't have a reverse grip handle. or the pointy bit at the tip. but still 10/10

Void Gear: hiii vanitas :) so anyway in my totally unbiased opinion this is the best keyblade ever obviously. love the gears and red accents and it's just super cool. the eyes and chains... vanitas character development keyblade when <3 10/10

Void Gear (White?): still very cool, love the simple contrast going on. 10/10

No Name: i didn't know this one was also called no name which is kinda lame. but i love the keyblade it's very cool. super glowy and i love the time design. 9/10

Crown Unlimit: I almost really like this one. very neat design, love the crowns and twists and glow. 7/10

Master's Defender: literally so plain and boring. i don't care if that's the point give it some frills. nice design though :/ 7/10

Broken Xblade: love the broken bits and the weird rust color. wish one of the kingdom keys was more broken and i think the top bit should be broken too. 7/10

Wooden Keyblade: sobbing and crying and tears. this is literally so cute and good and i love that it looks like Ends of the earth. or the kingdom key i guess. 10/10

Treasure Trove: i never expect to like this one but it's actually pretty nice :) wish the gems looked like they were spilling from the top and not leaking from the bottom. 8/10

Stroke of Midnight: also surprisingly nice! the guard kinda looks like a pumpkin which is cute. just a very cute design. 8/10

Fairy Stars: rad as hell. absolutely love this design very appealing. like how point the stars are. 9/10

Victory Line: i hate this one. maybe bc i don't like the world. kinda ugly and the teeth look awkward. 3/10

Mark of a Hero: ok we brought the clouds back but the weirdly buff trophy arm fucks this up. the blade is also just kind of a column, nothing going on there. 4/10

Hyperdrive: super cute!! love how the blade looks like laser fire and engine streams. the teeth are weird again though, and the handle looks like a bee 8/10

Pixie Petal: SO much better than fairy harp. this one is very cute and these teeth actually fit with the rest of the design. kinda short though >:/ 7/10

Sweetstack: oh this is so cute. a bunch of ice cream scoops!! why are the teeth oranges and what are some of those flavors. why are cones on the guard soft serve. 8/10

Ultima Weapon bbs: NICE. A SWORD WITH SOME FILIGREE BUT ALL IN BLUE. LOVE the wayfinders on it, very good for them. wish it wasn't just blue since it seems so aqua-centric but it looks nice soo 10/10

Skull Noise: LITERALLY SO PERFECT. THAT'S SO TWEWY. INCREDIBLE. the headphones and mr mew keychain... wonderful. only thing is that the name is kinda weird. like it makes sense but sounds weird. 10/10

Guardian Bell: i like it more than i think i would. elegant looking, and i love the gargoyles on it. hate the sentient gargoyles tho. 8/10

Dual Disk: VERY cool! looks like it has a reverse grip. the teeth are really cool and i love the bright blue. 9/10

Ferris Gear: eh. pretty cute but i think my pinocchio bias is acting up. the gears are nice, reminds me of wishing star. 5/10

Knockout Punch: SO COOL. really love the spikiness and colors and that the guard looks like the monkey. unfortunately for it, i don't like monkey. 8/10

All for One: the design's nice and it matches the world... but eh. 5/10

Counterpoint: so fun!! the violin guard is great, and the blade looks so cool. the teeth are a little awkward looking, it goes up too much. 9/10

Divewing: RAD!. just a sword with a heart on it and i love it. just so fucking cool. and the guard looks like a wing so 10/10

Sweet Dreams: so cute :) in love with the meow wow on top, but the teeth go up too much again. and i think there should be some komory wings on it. 7/10

Ultima Weapon DDD: NICE. almost identical to the kh1 blade, but blue and BETTER. the wings above the guard and the crown coming out of dream eater sigil... brilliant. 10/10

Unbound: not a hit 💔 just kinda weird and unfinished looking? and the lime green bit is off-putting. the hear at the top is nice. 2/10

End of Pain: ok mood shift hello. looks like it should be one of terra's evil blades. at first i was thrown off but looking closer it's so cool. the wings and eye at the top... the horns above the guard... the butterfly and gazing eye (buttereye) keychain... magnificent. the blade reminds me of x2 dark knight paine's sword. 10/10

Ocean Rage: looks pretty cool at first but the monstro mouth guard is literally horrifying i don't want to look at it anymore 1/10

YMX's keyblade: apparently has no name and is different than the one in bbs. nothing new really to say since it looks pretty similar but the goat head on top is super interesting. how much did No Name (luxu) influence young xehanort... 9/10

Mirage Split: absolutely perfect. i can't think of anything that isn't positive to say. the stained glass, the heart by the teeth, the thin lines, the gradient, wings, pointy, the keychain, literally all perfect. 10/10

Nightmare's End: also utterly perfect. i don't like yellow but it works here and looks great. the cyan gradient is startling but matches MS so i love it. all the colors in the stained glass are wonderful. 10/10

Starlight+: a little guady. but i love how the stars look like comets. the twisted blade looks neat too, but what's the point of the pointy bit on top. 7/10

Treasure Trove+: love that it looks golden and gem encrusted. very rich looking, but the cart is still leaking gems. 8/10

Lady Luck+: NOW the card thing makes more sense, i love how its incorporated throughout the design. more more interesting than the original. 9/10

Three Wishes+: looks like fire?? which is way cooler but why??? i like it more but where's the agrabah. 8/10

Olympia+: CLOUDS. like that zeus is in the clouds, but they took my columns. and the cyan handles are really weird. 7/10

Divine Rose+: excellent. what it should've been all along. the iridescenty guard is suuuper pretty and all the leaves and vines are great. 10/10

Moogle o' Glory: a lot happening here but i love smacking shit with a moogle head. there's so much happening and i don't really get it. 7/10

Fairy Stars+: i didn't know it could get better, the teeth is super cool looking but i wish the twisty blade was more visible. 9/10

Sleeping Lion+: love that it turns that metallic light blue color, very pretty. and the handle looks more like the gunblade! very nice looking and i used it a lot but the top is very weird. 9/10

Counterpoint+: let's take all the fun and exciting bits from the original and crANK IT UP TO ELEVEN. wait. stop. go back it's too much. very pretty still i love colors. 8/10

Fenrir+: my car key recovered from that fight. looks wayyy cooler and looks like ff7. hate the cyan glow though it feels weird. 6/10

Darkgnaw+: took me forever to find an image bc i keep calling it dreadgnaw. much cooler than the original, it looks like it's gonna bite you. the purple is also very nice. 9/10

Missing Ache+: POINTY. super cool but how does ventus twirl it around without poking himself. the colors are fun and it looks rad. 10/10

Diamond Dust+: i used this one the most <3 very pretty i love shades of blue and purple :) looks kinda icy but the top is weirdly flat. 9/10

Bad Guy Breaker: there's so much happening calm down 😭kinda nice but there's a lot to look at. also this world irritated me. 4/10

Gula's Keyblade: #leopardus4ever. as you can see, this keyblade is perfection. fun and spiky and lightningy. i think the whole blade should be lightning tho. 10/10

Aced's Keyblade: do any of these have names. anyway what a dreadgnaw ripoff 🙄 it suits him but guess what. i don't like him. 5/10

Ira's Keyblade: i don't like ira either but his blade is fucking great. love the teeth so much, and the colors. very pretty and cool 8/10

Invi's Keyblade: absolutely gorgeous. i love the flowing lines and little vines. love the colors and also it's super long. 9/10

Ava's Keyblade: girl this hurts to look at on a white background. very pretty though, i love how wispy and cloud-like it is. looks delicate which is great considering she'll kick anyone's ass. 8/10

No Name: unfortunately, this is absolutely wicked. look at it. it's wonderful. the goat head looks so much cooler than the other animal heads somehow, and i love the hollow center of the blade. and the teeth look like a claw, a little. just so fucking cool but i hate everyone who uses this. 10/10

Shooting Star: super pretty, i love how this one flows. i wish the blade went down to wrap around the guard though, instead of cutting off. 8/10

Hero's Origin: they took away my clouds again. i like that half of it is just. zeus. the lightning bolts are cool, but the handle and guard don't really match. 6/10

Favorite Deputy: you are not my favorite deputy fuck you. i don't like toy story but i do like cactuses. 3/10

Ever After: this one's nice :) the guard is super pretty, but i wish there was more going on with the blade. 7/10

Happy Gear: this one's kinda ugly but i like it soo. the energy canister guard is cute. 7/10

Crystal Snow: i hate it so much. it's boring and the keychain is olaf and i don't like frozen. 1/10

Hunny Spout: pretty cute :) the honey jars remind me of sweetstack. i like the wooden handle. 7/10

Wheel of Fate: cool as hell that's my boat. love that the blade looks like a mast that's so cool. wish it wasn't so gray though. 8/10

Nano Gear: ah, here's the color. i like everything except how the nanobots look at the top. it's just kinda gross. 7/10

Grand Chef: oh this is so cute. but why is remy the teeth. poor rat :( but it looks very nice i like how the Tower goes into the guard 8/10

Classic Tone: fuckyoufuckyoufuc. i hate this one. pretty ugly and i don't like it. 2/10

Starlight: SO GOOD. very simple but i like that. looks mysteriously similar to the kingdom key? i love it but it needs a little more going on. 9/10

Ultima Weapon 3: LOOK AT IT. ABSOLUTELY INCREDIBLE THEY CAN'T MAKE A BETTER ULTIMA WEAPON. the silver and red look so good and it's spiky and cool. and the red is glittery!!! why? i don't care it's phenomenal. the spiky heart teeth. that it looks like it's moving. i wish i could break my rating scale. 10/10

Braveheart: riku kingdomhearts stole my fucking car key. we've all heard the complaints i'm not repeating them 1/10

Star Cluster: it's really nice >:( mickey switch with riku pleaase. the star theme is really cute and the colors are nice but why does it look so similar to the kingdom key. 8/10

Flame Liberator: i don't like the name but ok i guess. the keyblade is so fucking cool though. it's what bond of flame wanted to be. i love fire and it looks like it moves so hell yeah. 9/10

Xblade: still can't decide if i like this or not. How do you hold it comfortably. Love the glistening spiky bits. 8/10

#that's all of them holy shit #you are required to read this #might make another list with all of them in order if i feel insane enough #kingdom hearts #pere's bullshit #kh #keyblades

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logically-asexual · 3 years

Text

okay i'm already procrastinating and i don't plan on sleeping any time soon so here we go.

☆ ✩ my personal ranking for every season 1 Sanders Sides episode. ✩ ☆

i think it's going to be pretty similar to @dukeofonions' but let's see if i find something new to contribute haha. i see you didn't include that one about Patton in the Big Game or whatever, so i'm not including it either xd. also i think i'm going to count Accepting Anxiety as one episode only.

edit: i finished and now i dare you to drink a shot of water every time i say the word spanish or a version of the word comfort and become very well hydrated.

#16 I'm in a Disney Show

(i agree with dukeofonions here) i always forget this episode exists. it was ok in terms of being happy for real life Thomas but as a Sanders Sides episode it didn't do anything. the sides were just giving their opinions but it wasn't very funny or interesting. also i'm bitter because it made me look up the episode he was in and i didn't like it at all. i don't know if i'm too old for those Disney shows now but Thomas was literally the only good part of it, everything else was really dull and boring imo. a waste of time.

however, Logan supporting clickbait is one of the funniest things ever, and i'll never forget it.

#15 Becoming A Cartoon

i didn't hate this episode but it was just .. meh.. you know? several factors contribute to this. one, i couldn't feel much nostalgia for Butch Hartman's shows because i watched them in Spanish, and everything feels really weird when they speak English, i don't like how my old cartoons sound in English. two, it was disappointing to me because we were all desperately waiting for Plot™ and instead they give us this short episode about nothing (oh how the tables have turned now it's the other way around haha). and three, i didn't like the style of the animation :/ their faces and expressions freaked me out, Roman's douchey face still haunts me.

#14 Way Too Adult

here i'm biased because i don't like Patton much, and i didn't back when i watched the series the first time either, so this video was a little disappointingwithout the rest. also it wasn't relatable to me because i am still too young and dependent on my parents haha. but Patton is funny and it's funny to laugh at Thomas' struggling.

#13 The Dark Side of Disney

i've never been a fan of Disney movies. i actually never watched Mulan or the Lion King or Aladdin as a kid, so meh. i liked the ending, though, it was cool to see Virgil have fun and be right for once. it does make me a bit uncomfortable because the way Thomas tries too hard with Virgil's mouth movements and his low voice reminds me of a guy that had made me v uncomfortable not long before watching that video. so an icky feel overall.

#12 A New Year of Lying to Myself

this video was actually kind of fogettable to me. i had a hard time connecting the voices in the song to the characters and idk. i don't love it nor hate it, just .. neutral.

#11 My True Identity

pretty much the same opinion as dukeofonions, again. it's a good introduction and it's good that it was the beginning of it all but on its own it's not very special. i think it's awesome on Thomas to have come up with such a clever idea, like choosing the dad, the teacher and the prince and putting them together and match them with thoughts?? that fit so perfectly?? it really is just very impressive when you think about it, that it was just a random idea he had for a short 5 minute video.

#10 Taking on Anxiety

i liked this video a lot because when i watched it i had recently been a lot on tumblr, and found out through relatable posts that i had anxiety. so watching this video was really fun and it made me happy to feel so seen, specially the intro when Thomas just talks about what it's like to have Anxiety and Virgil is so smug about it.

- ★ -

okay now that those are out of the way things are going to get hard... all the following i love with all my heart so i'm going to rank them based on the smallest things.

#9 Growing Up

once more, Patton isn't my favorite. so that's why i'm putting this here, plus the echo at the end askjhsahg, but i love love this video. i remember we were waiting and oh so ready for the angst of nobody taking Patton seriously. and we received!! i love that though Roman and Logan are antagonists here, they're both so happy about Thomas wanting to have a healthy life. and i just adore the way Logan admits his mistake at the end and asks Patton directly. my heart... also aw.. the nostalgia. i remember none of us knew how to spell Patton's name and were writing it in very funny ways until Thomas and Joan told us lol.

#8 The Mind vs The Heart

when i watched this video the first times i didn't like it much, because i only had eyes for Virgil, but later i came back to it and loved it. so taking that into account i'm putting it here. logicality was the first ship i ever shipped in the show because i saw a gifset on tumblr of Patton screaming "what do you know about love?!" and Logan "apparently more than YOU" and the caption said "MARRIED", and i thought hey yeah... anyway. i love them. they're both my dads since that day.

this video is so so so relatable and i love it. Logan and Patton are so much fun arguing and i love how they compromise at the end and work together. im reconsidering.. i might move it higher? no, fine i'll leave it here.

#7 Making Some Changes

this video was absolutely hilarious. i personally couldn't see it as the Sides still once they were acted by Thomas' friends, i enjoyed it more as that bunch being silly and trying to be the sides but failing in so many ways, while sometimes nailing stuff suddenly. i really don't take this one too seriously as an episode. except Joan!Logan and Valerie!Logan, my beloved... i love how Joan acted as Logan and their voice and that they kept their ace ring on.. there's a reason i had them as my icon for so long. and Valerie looks a bit (a lot) like me with the glasses and dressed in dark colors, plus she spoke Spanish and there's .. no words to describe the joy i felt when seeing/hearing that. wait i'm getting emotional...

#6 My Personality Q&A

when i watched this Virgil was my favorite side and i didn't care much about the rest lol. when i heard his answers i related to him SO much it was scary, and also his voice is so soft and it was all very comforting. it was also when i first starting looking at Logan with more attention, because when he brought up Big Hero 6 and Fall Out Boy and said he didn't sing and would recite it like a poem? it only took a couple seconds but my brain said "me" and never went back.

now this video is a little underwhelming to watch for me, most of the appeal for me was in finding out the answers, and also watching it when we didn't know a lot about the sides. now we know more and want to know more so it's not as fun to me as it was first.

i wish so bad they'd do another one, although i know it would be more difficult with a much bigger audience, i think they can manage and i just need it. the chaos.. the energy.. they all being so savage with each other, learning little random facts about them you didn't expect.. i need it.

- ★ -

oh boy top 5 here we go. the next three are practically a tie. i can't choose.

#5 Alone on Valentines Day

i love Valerie, and the idea of this video was perfect and so perfectly excecuted. every side just giving their crazy opinions on how to woo a random stranger, i laughed SO much. first with Logan speaking simlish out of nowhere? at that point i didn't know practically anything about the sims except that it was some video game and the whiplash of Logan going AYO and the rest killed me. then when Roman whipped out that dialogue in Spanish??? my life was completed. i've never felt more happy than i did in that moment gosh. just the hilarity of Roman's drama, the shock of them speaking Spanish suddenly like that, the absolute JOY of seeing a creator i like speak (may i say) perfect Spanish, the other characters' faces after that.. never been happier.

also the conclusion was so cute. Virgil solving the whole problem without wanting to. i loved it.

#4 Am I Original

i think this video speaks for itself. it was fun to watch them all do the ideas Roman had, plus Logan and Virgil nodding at each other, (i love them so much), plus the angst at the end of Roman's perfectionism, plus Roman's just perfect name. this video has it all.

i think Thomas posted it kind of late at night and i watched it at 7am in the classroom as i waited for my classmates to arrive and the class to start. (i usually was like 40 minutes early to school due to mom’s work). i had to contain my laughter and it wasn’t easy.

#3 Losing My Motivation

i started loving this video after a while, when Logan passed Virgil in the position for my favorite side. but once he did this episode was beautiful. it's so funny and i love Logan and Patton's dynamic so much. and the video also so damn relatable in general. i felt so seen with it because they named all the problems i have when procrastinating, down to Patton's vague explanation of his feelings, it's exactly how i feel every time i want to do stuff. and the plot twist! i can hear the dramatic sound effect and see how they all turn to Logan clearly in my head, and it always makes me smile. plus there's so much Logan angst that can be dug up and overanalized. i love to watch it over and over.

#2 Accepting Anxiety

this video was perfect. everything we wanted. we knew it was coming and it delivered perfectly, better than any fanfic done in the waiting time. the week between the parts was agonizing but in a fun way somehow. i remember precisely when i was watching part 2 in my living room. i screamed. and i cried, a lot. i was feeling terrible at that time in my life and Thomas was such a comforting presence and i can't begin to describe how this episode made me feel.

and later it is always fun to rewatch with all their different reactions to being in Virgil's room, the energy of that was on point. Thomas is such a great actor and the characters where just amazingly performed. plus it gave so much to talk adn think about, the idea of the rooms, lots lots of insight into the characters, foreshadowing, so much. it's just perfect i have nothing else to say.

#1 (for purely emotional reasons, ironically) My Negative Thinking

i think Accepting Anxiety is the best episode of the season objectively but my favorite is My Negative Thinking. because i love Virgil and Logan so much and seeing them argue together was and is great. the comfort.. i can't repeat that word enough throughout this post. it's such a soft video while not being overwhelming with Patton and Roman's outbursts. just quiet (mostly) and clear and with perfectly timed humour.

Logan my beloved.. learning spanish... helping me with my own anxiety.. and their debate was so good. and the fact that they were friends i- i can't. Virgil didn't think Logan liked him and Logan told him explicitly that he did and the casual softness of it i cant even. Logan is happy that he tried.. it's just marvelous. Virgil and Logan as best friends will always be my favorite pair, and their dynamic will always be what i strive for in any relationship i might form, with both sides silently comforting each other within their own limits and realistic perspectives. so nice.

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so yeah. that's all. thank you if you read all the way up to here. ♡ ♡ ♡

#sanders sides #thomas sanders #logan sanders #virgil sanders #patton sanders #roman sanders

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