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matbarzyy · 4 years

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Impossible

A/N: If you follow me on main you might know I’ve been obsessed with Impossible by Nothing But Thieves, so I tried to use it to write a fic. It definitely deserves a listen if you wanna have that playing in the background while you read. This is a best friends to lovers fic starting off a lil angsty but it ends well.

Word count: 4358

Love it stings, and then it laughs

At every beat of my battered heart

Something was wrong.

You couldn’t tell what it was just yet, but the way Mat was texting you wasn’t normal. He wanted to talk, he tried to keep the conversation going, but the texts were empty of content. It was so unlike Mat that you didn’t realise how worried you were until you tasted blood in your mouth from the way you bit your lip.

He was a ray of sunshine and a dork, always throwing jokes around and acting like an idiot. Seeing Mat sad was a rare occurrence.

You didn’t know what put him in that state but you guessed he needed something to distract himself, so you decided to call him.

“Alright, what’s up with you?” You spoke as soon as Mat picked up the phone. There was a sigh on the other end of the line and a ruffling noise before you heard him.

“Nothing,” He replied weakly, trying to hide a sniffle by putting the phone away from his face. You picked up on it anyway.

“Mat?” Your voice softened and your heart squeezed. “Are you okay?”

“I don’t know,” He admitted, unable to give you a better answer as he lay on his bed without moving, tears streaming down his cheeks.

You took it as a clear no. The only times Mat ever called you to cry were after hockey games he lost, and that was only if he was too far for you to be with him. Whenever he played at home you came to see him and stayed to celebrate or cheer him up depending on the outcome.

“Where are you?” There was no need to ask if he needed you, the answer was obvious, you just had to ask where you had to go.

“Home,”

“I’m coming over, hold on, okay?” You slid into your sneakers as quick as you could, too rushed to undo the laces and put them on properly.

“Okay,” He whispered so low you barely heard him.

He went quiet on the phone and you hung up after promising him you’d be there in no time. You lived close enough to him that you could walk, driving was pointless unless you had a lot to carry. Mat had made you pick this apartment on purpose when you moved to New York, he argued that he’d be close if you ever needed anything, and you had never been more glad to be there.

He was your best friend in school when times were simpler, and he somehow remained your best friend when his hockey career began. Things were different with the distance, but you were the little bit of home he could stay attached to. He had been ecstatic to find out you were joining him in New York after your degree so that you could work on a masters.

Anthony had quickly become one of your best friends too, and you all got along well with Mat’s girlfriend. Lena wasn’t as part of the group as you thought she would be when you first met her, but you didn’t mind it too much. You liked spending time with just Mat and Tito, she was nice but always calm and calculated. It didn’t fit with the spontaneous crackhead energy you shared with the boys.

You often wondered why Mat always reached out to you rather than her. You could understand when he went to Tito, he understood him when it came to hockey and guy things you couldn’t wrap your head around, but you spent endless nights questioning where you fit in the middle of that. Mat never let you feel left out, no matter how invested he was in his relationship he always made time for you.

“I’m here,” You called out when you unlocked the door. You had a spare key from the moment you arrived, officially because he needed someone to have it in case he got locked out, unofficially because he wanted you to be able to come over whenever you wanted. “Hey,” You found him in his bedroom, dried tears on his cheeks as he looked at you with heartbreak written all over his face. “What happened?”

“Lena’s been cheating on me for four months,” Mat whispered, his eyes falling shut as he dug his teeth into his lip to stop himself from crying again. He had been rehearsing the words in his head since you called so that he could tell you, but they still tore at his heart.

“Oh my god,” You sat on the edge of the bed and leaned over to engulf him in a hug. That at least explained why he called you. He needed comfort, and as sweet as Tito was he was also fiercely protective, you knew he’d go rip her apart if he found out now. Mat’s chest shook with small sobs while one of his arms wrapped around you, clinging to you for dear life. “Shit Mat, I’m so sorry,”

“I was- I was just going to surprise her,” He cried against your shoulder, tears beginning to soak your shirt. “And I found them,”

“Come here,” You breathed out as you slid onto the bed more comfortably, letting Mat curl himself against you. You had held him while he cried before, but you had never seen him look that small. “You deserve so much better,”

“I just-” He hiccuped. “I can’t believe she’s been doing this for so long,”

“I know… I don’t even know what to say,”

“Four years,” His words were so choked you barely understood them. He was the most broken you had ever seen him and your heart fell apart for him. No one should have to go through that, but it angered you more than anything that someone as sweet as Mat had to be the one to suffer from it. “I trusted her,”

“I know you did,” You nodded, gently running your fingers through his hair in a way you hoped would soothe him. On some particularly quiet nights at home when you were drunk with no one but him and Tito he liked to rest his head in your lap to make you play with his hair. It wasn’t something Lena really did for him, he had told you one day, but he never let himself be that close to you when people were around in case pictures circulated and she became unbelievably jealous again.

They had a fight about it once, and you wished you realised how horrible she was back then. She played it off on insecurities when it was pure misplaced jealousy, and you could now add hypocrisy to that. Mat was a good boyfriend, reassuring her and talking to you about it to make sure you’d know not to be too touchy when she was around.

It should have clicked in your head that she didn’t belong with him at all when he was forced to hide his affection for you and any other woman in his life. Tito might have been a bit smarter than you about it, he never even tried to take a liking to her while you made efforts to get along with her for Mat’s sake.

“I don’t want to fall in love ever again.” He sniffled against your shoulder, only calming down for a second before his sobs became louder.

There was nothing you could do except hold him through the rest of the night.

Somebody told me and I think they’re right

There is a change on its way tonight

It took a few months for Mat to feel better. He kept blaming himself, trying to find where he went wrong, and it took many pep talks from you to remind him that he was worth more than that. None of it was his fault, Lena was a heartless liar using him, and she didn’t deserve all of the tears he shed over her.

Tito helped too, joining your efforts as soon as he found out. Between the both of you Mat got plenty of encouragement and love, it was at least enough for him to appear fine to everyone else around him. Only you and Tito got his late night phone calls and texts when he got in his head and began blaming himself for everything that ever went wrong in his life.

Girls were still flirting with him, some of them asking him out on dates, but he turned them all away without a care. You thought he might get into a bit of a fuckboy phase to take his mind off things, but even that didn’t happen.

Neither you or Tito pushed it, he needed patience.

“You’re in love with him,” Tito accused you one night. He was the only one still sitting at the table you had secured in the bar for the rest of the team and their significant others. There was enough space that everyone was standing and mingling around the room. You were practically filling the whole bar anyway, there weren’t many other customers.

“That obvious, uh?” You gave him a weak smile, glancing in Mat’s direction.

“You’ve only been giving him all of your time and attention for the past year,” He shrugged. “I figured it out after I saw you turn down three dates the first month you were here,”

“Nice catch, I barely had it figured out for myself then,” You admitted, taking a weight off your shoulders. You had never been able to confess your feelings for Mat to anyone before. It shouldn’t have come as a surprise that Tito was the one to figure it out. “I just don’t want him to know yet,”

“Why not?”

“Because he’s too scared to fall for anyone again, or I would have told him already,” You saw him down the rest of his drink and laugh loudly at something one of his friends said, and that sound alone made a smile appear on your lips.

“He trusts you though,” Tito brought you back to the conversation. He had spent enough time with you to know, and he wished the two of you could see things as clearly as he did.

“Not to let himself love me as more than just a friend,” You sighed, your heart squeezing at the thought. “I know what he’s going through, well, not to that extent, but yeah, I know the kind of trust issues that come with it,” You had spent a long time getting over an ex who only cheated with a kiss, and you had barely been with him for six months back then. You could only imagine what it did to Mat to find out his girlfriend of four years lied to his face for four months straight.

“I honestly believe he already has feelings for you, he just won’t act on them just yet,”

“Maybe… Either way, all I can do is wait until he notices,” You could still give him time. You didn’t blame him for keeping his distance, as much as it hurt you had seen the damage his last relationship had done to him and you were willing to wait. You couldn’t see yourself falling for anyone else, Mat was the only one in your heart.

“Mat might act like an idiot all the time but he pays attention to people, he knows how much you care about him,” Tito assured you. You didn’t see it, but Mat was always looking at you and turning to you for everything. You were more than just his best friend and it was painfully obvious.

Mat wasn’t doing it subconsciously either. He was all too aware of your feelings for him, and he fought with himself trying to repress his own for a long time.

You were his best friend back home, but ever since you came to New York you had become so much more than that. Even when his relationship still held up you were the person he shared everything with. You and Tito were his favorite people, he constantly hung out with you without realising what you truly meant to him. Tito was like a brother but it was different with you.

Accepting his feelings for you while getting over his ex was a lot to handle, but he eventually got there. There was only so much patience you could have, he was scared it would wear off before he grew the balls to jump in and tell you the truth.

He could see you sitting with Tito while he was out there drinking, and he couldn’t help but walk over. There was no way for him to enjoy his night unless you did too.

“Come on, you’re missing out on all the fun,” He cheerfully grabbed your hand and pulled you up from the table, motioning for Tito to join.

“Someone’s drunk,” You chuckled when he wrapped an arm around you and pulled you into his chest. Drunk Mat was always extra needy.

“Only a little,” He grinned down at you.

His loud laugh echoed through the room when you took the opportunity to tickle his sides, and he jumped away from you with a squeal. It was the most beautiful sound, one you had missed for a whole month when he never let himself be truly carefree.

“See! This is why I can never bring you to work related stuff!” He tried to retaliate but you blocked his hands, wriggling around until he gave up and put his arm around your waist.

“Why, because I always make sure we have a good time when we’re out?” You laughed at the memories of all the stupid things you had done together when he was supposed to act professional. Granted, trying to see which one of you could catch the most olives in their mouth while the other threw them hadn’t been your smartest idea, but that dinner had been boring and the backlash had been worth it.

“More like because he can’t focus on shit if you’re around,” Tito muttered and you bit your lip in response, wondering if that was really the case. Mat was just Mat around you, but was he different when you weren’t there?

“Something like that,” The brown haired giant remained oblivious to his best friend’s words, too drunk and excited to notice. “But now you need a drink!”

“I’m driving you home, dumbass,” You laughed and resisted his grip while he tried to drag you towards the bar.

“We can uber!” Mat’s face lit up like the idea made him a genius, and you had a hard time not turning into a puddle at the sight. He was so cute it was unfair.

“And leave my car here? I don’t think so,”

“Tito, help me,” Mat looked to his friend, puppy eyes at their finest, to convince him.

“I only had one beer, I can drive,” The man sighed, rolling his eyes at Mat’s behaviour. It was the best compromise so that you wouldn’t have to leave your car and Mat could get his way.

If he could anything that might finally get you two together he’d do it. He was sick of watching you like this when you should obviously be a couple. As stupid as it was, he hoped the alcohol would help you loosen up and get closer. Mat hadn’t been with anyone in a long time and he was obviously lonely, there was a solid chance you’d at least be cuddling by the end of the night.

“You don’t have to,” You tried to ignore the hand that tugged on your arm, making sure Tito was okay with not drinking for the rest of the night. You promised you’d drive, you didn’t want to ruin his fun.

“I don’t really want to drink more, you’re good, go,” He gave you a gentle push, and a second later you were stumbling after Mat because he often forgot how strong his grip was.

“Two shots of tequila and a rum and coke please,” He asked a little louder than he needed to, but the bartender clearly didn’t mind. The guys tipped well when they were out, and since the whole team was filling the bar you knew the whole staff was happily making more money than on regular nights.

“You really think you should be drinking tequila?” You laughed at his state, knowing he was only about to get worse. You didn’t mind it, he was always closer when drunk, clinging to you like a baby, and there was nothing you craved more than his hugs.

“Nope, that’s all for you,” He handed a bill to the bartender to pay for the drinks. “You need to catch up,”

“You’re going to be the reason I die one of these days,”

“Promise I’ll make sure you get home in one piece,” His lips pressed against your temple and you melted into him. He’d always make sure you were safe.

You didn’t know what to do with the mixed signals you got from him. Tito was right, you were almost sure he had feelings for you, but you wondered if he would ever act on them or if he would only want to keep you as a friend. You could only have your hopes up for so long.

The shots were placed down in front of you before you could let yourself overthink things more, and you took both with a grimace under Mat’s stare.

He was trying his best not to let himself ruin a potential relationship with you. He knew he loved you, but getting with you before he was ready would be a mistake. You were more than a rebound and you deserved to be treated right. Mat couldn’t be the one for you until he fixed himself, but knowing that gave him the energy to be better. He let himself slip into the depth of the love he felt for you, allowing himself to fall a little further every day until he was so in love with you he knew he could never go back.

The night ended as predicted, you and Mat were so drunk you laughed constantly and could barely walk, Tito tried his best to be patient as he helped you both to the car.

“Guys,” He groaned as you stopped once again, doubling over into a fit of laughter at something he didn’t understand. He was mostly amused but had to act serious for either of you to listen to him. “Come on, hop in,”

“Thanks Tito,” You gave him a big hug while Mat opened the car’s door.

“Yeah yeah,” He rubbed your back with a chuckle. “Get in there and hug Mat,” He guided you to the backseat where Mat already was, leaving the passenger seat empty.

“Tito said I should hug you,” You leaned over to him and rested your head on his shoulder as you did so.

He only hummed in response, wrapping his arms around you while Tito started the car. It would be a short drive to Mat’s place, and the three of you knew there’d be no need to drive to yours. Tito’s car was at Mat’s because you had picked them up there to come to the bar, so he’d be able to drive home and leave your car where you’d spend the night.

Getting up to Mat’s apartment was surprisingly easy. Your energy had died down in the car and you were both just dying to get in bed. Tito had to fight a little to get you both to drink water while you complained you were hungry, so he promised to make you food if you both just went to bed.

“Alright, everyone comfy?” Tito had to stop himself from rolling his eyes when he found you settled under the covers together. Mat was shirtless and you were in one of his t-shirts, you couldn’t look more like a couple. “Here,” He let you both sit up against the headboard before handing you plates.

“You’re ‘e ‘est” Mat dug in and spoke with his mouth half full of his sandwich. You nodded after him, looking up at the blue eyed man.

“Drink some more water before you fall asleep, okay?” He chuckled as he thought that soon enough all of your nights would look like this. You might have thought that Mat needed more time but Tito could see he didn’t, he had already let himself fall for you, you just had to let it happen.

I could drown myself in someone like you

I could dive so deep I never come out

Dinner at Mat’s was common, but a homemade dinner at Mat’s wasn’t. You didn’t hide your surprise when you smelled chocolate brownies baking in the oven as you walked in on a Friday night. Mat rarely went through the trouble of making food himself when he could get it cooked by someone else who would know how to prepare it right.

He had texted you to come over early during the week, so you knew he had this planned and it wasn’t just another spontaneous night you’d spend together.

“You cooked?” You took a look at what was in the oven while he stood by the stove.

“Um, yeah,” He scratched the back of his head nervously, moving a pan off the heat while you smiled.

“It smells good,” You reassured him and earned a relieved sigh. You had teased him about his cooking skills hundreds of times, but he really had tried tonight.

You sat with him like everything was normal although the dinner and bottle of red on the table told you it wasn’t. Mat was a nervous wreck, glancing at the candles he had left unlit on a shelf because he knew it’d be too much to add them to the table.

You carried the conversation easily through the beginning of the meal, giving him some more time to say what he needed to. You could see he had something to get off his chest, but you didn’t try to push it until dessert. You could barely believe he was serving you a homemade brownie with freshly cut strawberries and your favorite brand of vanilla ice cream.

He was slowly turning quiet, obviously thinking too hard.

“What is it?” You bumped your foot into his to get his attention.

Mat finally looked up from his dessert, taking a deep breath in before letting the words flow out.

“I’ve fallen for you so damn hard,” He put his spoon down, looking at you with a slightly awkward smile. Mat was rarely shy around you, but there he was, knee bouncing under the table and running his hand through his hair too many times.

“The feeling’s mutual,” You abandoned the rest of your dessert to focus on him with a soft smile. You thought you’d feel butterflies or excitement when it finally happened, but Mat’s confession only brought warmth to you. It made you feel like everything was finally falling into place.

“I know,” He breathed out, reaching for your hand across the table. It wasn’t the first time he held it, but it was the first time he let himself get amazed by how small it was in his. “I just… I thought it was impossible, I didn’t want that again. But you’ve got more patience than anyone else I know and… and you made it all possible,”

“I knew you’d need time to come around,” You ran your thumb over the back of his hand, looking straight into his eyes. Mat felt his heart melt at the sight, it was like you had known this would happen all along while he wondered if he was meant to be single for the rest of his life.

“I didn’t think I would,” He honestly answered, knowing he could voice his insecurities around you without fear of being judged. You had been his rock this whole time, his steady while he was a mess. “And I probably wouldn’t have if it wasn’t for you. You’ve pulled me out of my head so many times, so thank you,”

“Come here,” You pushed your chair back and got up while Mat mirrored your movements.

He pulled you into a tight hug almost instantly, placing a soft kiss on top of your head while you rubbed soothing circles on his back. There wasn’t a lot you needed to say once you were there, holding each other.

“I love you,” He gave you a gentle squeeze, the words floating in the air for less than a second before you replied.

“I love you too,” You pulled away to look at him, cupping his cheek and feeling him lean into your touch. “And I know how much it takes for you to say that, so thank you, for trusting me,”

“I’ve always trusted you,”

The tip of his nose touched yours and you both smiled, letting your eyes fall shut before your lips finally met.

In all of the years you had known Mat you had never exchanged a kiss, not even during a dumb drinking game. You had only imagined this moment a million times, and now that it was finally happening you could barely think.

His lips were soft, the stubble growing on his face tickled your skin, and it all felt like perfection. Nothing could have ever prepared you for what it’d be like to kiss the person you were in love with.

“Wow,” Mat whispered as he pulled away, his hands trembling slightly.

“Yeah,” You chuckled before a frown appeared in your face. “Hey,” You got him to look at you rather than his feet. “What are you so nervous for? It’s just me,”

“Sorry, I’m, uh, all out of practice when it comes to that stuff,” He admitted, his hands coming to your waist to hold you.

“How about we clean up and get on the couch so you can get practice again, mmh?” You kissed his cheek and instantly got a smile back on his face.

“That sounds perfect.”

Please reblog guys! Feedback and comments are always super encouraging and help me write more

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syinisuga · 3 years

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Begin Again [MinYoongi]

Pairing : Yoongi x Reader

Word count : 5.2K

Genre : Fluff and Angst

Description : Friends to lovers, Long Distance relationship, Lovers to (?)

Summary : when you thought the friendship you once had with him died away after one silly mistake, and you thought you would never have again what you lost;

But it blossoms back unexpectedly stronger and is slowly growing to be something more beautiful than you ever had

"I've been spending the last eight months thinking all love ever does is break and burn, and end;

But on a Wednesday in a cafe i watched it Begin Again"

--------------------✨📖✨---------------------

It was the start of a new year and you weren't particularly happy about being moved up a few classes into an entirely new class with relatively new students you haven't personally met yet. You were still grateful for your good results in the past year to have you land in such a good class. In all honesty though, you did miss your friends from your old class, all of them being scattered in the back classes however changed your mind about being thankful that you're at least in a better one. The first few days of getting used to the classes went by rather slowly as you were listening to the introductions of the other students and teachers half mindedly, till around your 4th day into the classes that is.

You were randomly seated in the Chemistry lab by the teacher as she familiarised herself with the rest of the class. Not paying much attention you were spacing out, resting your chin on your palm, tapping away at your cheek.

" Um, hey there"

The voice from the stool next to you spoke. You turned your head to the direction of the voice, being met with warm brown eyes looking right at you. He had soft black hair, eyes slightly puffy as if he hadn't slept well the night before, lips curled up in a slight smile as he looked at you.

"Oh, hello"

you answered, trying not to sound overly shocked at the first human interaction you've had in this new class.

"I'm yoongi, what's your name?"

"I'm y/n, nice to meet you Yoongi"

"So what are your interests? What do you like to do y/n? Any hobbies?"

It definitely took you by surprise when this boy you've never really met before was suddenly making an interest to get to know you more. Something about him felt raw and not shy but in a good way.

"Well i really love listening to music and i do indulge in art as well. Spend most of my time listening to songs while drawing. Draw the mood of the song you know?"

"Damn, haha you sound kinda like me. Not tryna be cheesy or anything but i love listening to music too, I'm shit at drawing tho, i can barely draw a stickman"

Both of you exchanged a little chuckle at his open confession about himself. And even though it had only been a few minutes of words between the two of you, you felt at that moment that he wasn't like the other boys who popped up to talk to you first. This one genuinely seemed interested in you just to make a new friend.

-----------------------🤝------------------------

"Yo y/n you wanna ditch PE and hang out in the library? The new Resident Evil movie came out we can watch"

"You know what, yeah let's yeet"

You don't know how it went from spending lunch times together, to skipping the most boring subjects to hang out and hide. It'd been a few months since you started your new friendship with Yoongi, and by now you were known as the inseparable duo, funny enough both of you became the class representatives. Somehow you two got closer and closer each day, the more you talked the more you felt like you've known each other for years, yet some part of you knew that there was more to Yoongi than he was showing to you.

On a particularly slow day at your classes, you and Yoongi had pre planned to sneak out to hang out at your usual spot in the library. Sitting at the back of the library the both of you laughed at a joke Yoongi made about how almost the whole school shipped the both of you.

"You know y/n, I envy you"

"Oh well, I know I'm fabulous" you playfully said as you flipped your hair back, earning a little grunt and a harmless eye roll from Yoongi.

"It's not that you loonatic, i envy you...cause you have such a nice relationship with your family"

His sudden statement caught you slightly off guard but you gave him a look, clearly eager to know the reason behind his words. Flashing half a smile towards you he starts his story.

"Growing up for me was, well, it was an experience. I grew up under the care of foster parents who constantly reminded me that my parents gave me away cause i was a burden, all my life that's what i was told. Never had a father figure or mother figure to help shape my emotions? Guess that's why I don't show it if I'm sad or depressed, which is actually most of the time"

he looks down at his hands and chuckles softly.

"But you know something y/n? Being with you makes me feel like I could be myself, like I don't have to be afraid of being judged. And that's why I wanted you to know the truth but i understand if you don't wanna get involved or-"

You cut him off by placing your hand on his, giving him a reassuring smile.

"Yoongi, i want you to know that I'll always be here for you and you can talk to me about this anytime okay? You're my best friend now! And I'm hoping I'm yours too?" You ask in a more playful tone making yoongi giggle.

"Of course you are"

"Good! Cause i come in a package deal of crackhead and supportive as well as a no return contract"

"Sounds perfect to me bestie"

-----------------------😚------------------------

Over 2 years had passed and the whole highschool down to the teachers were sure the two of you were in a relationship, as everyone saw the two of you being practically stuck together almost all the time. Yoongi and your friendship became stronger than ever since that day he decided to open up to you. It became a regular thing where you'd confide in each other for emotional comfort as well as motivation and support. Not missing the fact that your level of crackhead together had become an all time high.

Your finals and exams blasted through and you had spent all your study weeks with Yoongi in the library. As sketchy as it was you and your best friend actually did sincere studying. And as it would, your hard work together paid off earning the both of you high marks in your finals. The two of you didn't miss to make a trademark crackhead scene at the receiving of the scroll ceremony when you accidentally tripped on your shoelace and Yoongi cracked up laughing and clapping before helping you up. The two of you celebrate with drinks and a lot of food that night and Yoongi paid for everything to make it up to you for laughing when you fell.

You looked at yourself one last time in the mirror before heading out to your highschool's hall. It was your graduation party but more importantly to you it was Yoongi's birthday. Coincidentally the two events had fallen on the same day, and what better opportunity than to get dressed up to party at your graduation ceremony together. It had been a heck of a ride these last two years, and you were going to make sure this last school event would be memorable.

Upon arriving you scan around the hall of students in search of the familiar face.

"Looking for me?"

He makes his presence behind you known by clearing his throat. You turn around to give your usual playful comment back but the words were caught in your throat as your gaze landed on your best friend. He was dressed smart, in a suit that looked like it was custom made to fit him, his hair in a side part and bangs neatly framing his face. You were so used to seeing him in his casual hoodies and ripped jeans that seeing him in formal wear made you choke on your words.

Too focused on getting your senses back in check, you don't notice how Yoongi's train of thought was stopped dead in its tracks as he watched you turn around to face him. He never pictured his crackhead of a best friend in something other than t-shirts and track pants. Seeing you in a dress that hugged your figure in all the right places and taking in the sight of you, with your makeup and hair all done to suit the dress you were wearing nearly made him pass out from how he was holding his breath to admire you.

Clearing the silence between the two of you, Yoongi speaks up first.

"Well well, you don't completely look like the satanic spawn of hot cheetos and depression today. You actually look pretty good"

Smirking a little smile you bite back at his comment.

"Well same to you too Mr. I'm a millennial emo teen. You actually look, presentable today"

The two of you exchanged a playful giggle and assumed your seats at your class tables as the ceremony went on.

You don't see the small glances Yoongi takes in your direction, the thoughts gushing through his mind about how you looked at the moment and cursing himself for not realising your features sooner. He admired the way you had chosen to dress up today, seeing the way you had styled your hair so your curls would frame your face, the way you had done your makeup in a more natural looking way that he thought suited you perfectly. Yoongi didn't remember when the unlabeled feelings for you came but the longer he looked at you the more he was starting to put a name to the feelings he had. So much so that he had completely spaced out in his thoughts of you like that he didn't realise you were speaking to him.

" -don't you think so Yoongi?"

"I'm sorry what did you say? The umm, the music is so loud"

"I saaaaiiddd it's beginning to get a little dull at this graduation ceremony, we need a little surprise, don't you think?"

"Surprise?? What kind of surprise?"

Flashing a smile his way you get up and walk towards the front of the hall where the ceremony host was finishing up their ending speech. Whispering into the host's ear, he gives you the microphone and you confidently stride to the front. But you accidentally go too close to the speaker and it lets out an unpleasant squee, making you move back and away a little. You look up and around finding your best friend's eyes looking back at you giggling at the scene that just occured.

"Well that's one way to get everyone's attention" you chuckle earning muffled chuckles and words from the hall.

"So firstly congrats to everyone on graduating y'all did it. But that's not why I'm up here right now. Today is a special day for someone, and since it's the last day we'll all be gathering I wanted to make this memorable for him. So everyone I would like to wish out here, HAPPY BIRTHDAY MIN YOONGI"

you started to sing happy birthday and the rest of the hall joined in singing with you.

In all this happening, Yoongi could only focus on you, the way you just boldly got up to sing out loud and wish him Happy Birthday in the most "you" way possible. So he didn't know if it was the moment or if it was his unlabeled feelings overflowing for you, that he got up and walked towards you as the song was ending. He couldn't tell what came over him at that moment but he knew for sure he wasn't going to stop what he was about to do next. Cupping your cheeks in his palms, he leaned in, pressing his soft lips to yours. Kissing you with deep feelings overtaking his mind. The moment his lips touched yours he knew what those unlabeled feelings were, it was Love.

You couldn't process fast enough that your best friend was striding towards you with a goal, a desire. And you surely didn't expect for him to suddenly kiss you. Registering the feeling of his lips on yours, your eyes closed on their own as if on automatic response. You sank into the feeling of his lips, and it was then you felt the spark that ignited your own unlabeled feelings for Yoongi. You had definitely asked yourself countless times before if what you were feeling for Yoongi was more than just friendship. On the countless nights he had cried on your shoulder or when you cried on his, on the many occasions where you were both always partners in crime, you would always glance at Yoongi and wonder what more could there be to the feelings between you.

As the both of you slowly pulled away from each other a roaring sound of cheers erupted as it seemed to be that the two of you were the last ones to know you two were actually in love with each other. Taking your hand in his, Yoongi and you ran out of the hall that night knowing well where the two of you stood from that moment on.

-----------------------❤️------------------------

"No babe I think you should definitely take the opportunity to study there, I know it's far but it'll be really good for you, plus it's something you really like! It'll take some time for you to get used to the new place but i know you'll fit right in. In fact i know your wack ass would stand out"

You giggled at his comment but you wholeheartedly took his motivation and advice. But the question and thoughts still lingered in your mind as you heard Yoongi chuckle on the other end of the phone.

"But Yoongi, this means we'd be in a long distance relationship, with you going off to study in the opposite direction and all. Even our breaks don't match Yoongi.. what'll we do" the worrying tone in your voice didn't go unnoticed by Yoongi as he answered you in a calm reassuring tone.

"It'll take some work, but i know we can get through this okay? We'll make it, we can make it. I love you" you smiled at Yoongi's voice uttering the sweet words of love as you felt yourself calm your thoughts.

"I love you too Yoongi. Well then, keep me company while i pack?"

"You bet"

It had been a few months since you started dating, and honestly it didn't feel any different from when the two of you were in your phase of friendship, everything was going relatively smooth apart from the little fights and misunderstandings you had now that you were a couple. Sometimes you sit to think to yourself if moving into a relationship with Yoongi was the best choice, it would feel as though sometimes he would act differently and not like he always would but you just shake of the thoughts. You just figured with all these future college studies and intakes coming about that he was just as stressed as you were. You assured yourself that the two of you would be alright and that you'll always have each other.

A few more months pass and the two of you have already started your college lives. Yoongi being in a campus almost 8 hours away from you with minimal transport for him to even go home let alone plan to meet you. It was going smoothly, settling into orientation and getting to know the layouts of the campus well, meeting new friends and truly taking in your next step in education. You and Yoongi would exchange day to day text messages about how orientation and the first days of classes went.

All well and good till Yoongi's texts became slower and less frequent, he would always say that he's busy with his friends there, or straight up not giving a response at all. You became more and more fearful at how this long distance thing was going to work out for the two of you.

28th Tuesday

[12:27am] hey Yoongi! I hope you had a great day, I miss you and hope you sleep well, love you!

[08:40am] Hey Babe, good morning! I'm in class now, wishing we could skip like old times haha, hope you have a great day! Text me soon

[6:48pm] Hey i just got back to my dorm after classes, it was super fun! How was your day??

[8:11pm] Yoongi?? Are you okay? Are you busy babe?

[8:24pm] I miss youuuuuuuu :(

[10:16pm] Yoongi :(

You tossed your phone to the side of your bed as you felt your tears well up, why was he suddenly avoiding you? Is he okay?? Did he get hurt? Your thoughts were spiraling, getting messier till you heard the familiar ping from your phone. You scurried to your phone to see Yoongi's name pop up on the screen. Your smile quickly faded, replaced by disappointment at his reply.

[10:43pm] Hey, was busy with friends today, going to bed now ttyl <3

You frowned and wouldn't let him go this time. The days of short texts to unreplied texts and this is how he replies now? In a fit of fury you call him.

"Hello?-"

"Yoongi what's wrong? You haven't been replying to my texts as usual are you okay??"

"Mmh I'm fine, just busy with classes and my new friends y/n"

"Well I can't accept that answer Yoongi, I'm busy with classes and friend's here too but I take the time so why can't you?"

"Hey it's not that big of a deal y/n, we're in new environments now and it'll take me some time to settle in"

"Yoongi surely you have at least 5 minutes a day to text me??"

"Yeah of course I do, I just texted you didn't i?"

"That short ass reply was what you call a text Yoongi? It really sounds like you're avoiding me"

"You know what y/n I don't have time for this right now I'm tired"

"No Yoongi, I haven't talked to you properly in days come on don't you miss me Yoongi?"

"To be honest I've been enjoying the new company here that's I haven't missed you much"

"What do you mean Yoongi? You don't think of me?"

"Not all the time no, i have other things to think about here y/n i have new responsibilities here I can't be thinking about you all the damn time, just be happy I texted you back"

"Are you threatening to not text me anymore Yoongi? Is that what you're saying? You don't wanna talk to me anymore?"

"Oh god for fucks sake y/n stop being so clingy alright? Just grow up a little!"

The sound of his voice in heightened frustration made you choke on your words, you silenced yourself as his words rang loud in your head.

"You know what y/n I don't think this will work out, I'm going to get even busier and this will just be in the way of it all"

"Yoongi…"

"I'm sorry y/n but clearly this distance is proving that we won't work out"

"Are you... breaking up with me Yoongi?.."

The pain in your voice and the soft shaky exhale doesn't go unnoticed by Yoongi. Yoongi takes a deep breath, realising he spoke too fast in frustration. As much as he did feel for you this distance was tearing you apart and Yoongi didn't want to believe it but it was the truth. He spoke softer this time giving his side of his explanation.

"Y/n, you've been nothing but amazing to me, but I realize that we were more compatible as friends, I mean think about it, we've had so many petty fights that we never had before we dated. Our growing college life will further hinder our relationship. I don't want to hurt you like this by not giving you the love and attention you deserve. I'll always love you y/n, just not as more than friends I suppose"

You couldn't believe what was happening right now, your world felt like it was crashing down on you hard and fast, you could feel the sharp stinging in your chest from how your heart was breaking the more reality hit you. Yoongi's words had reason to them, but you were still in a state of confusion. Why could you make time for Yoongi but he couldn't for you? Maybe it's because the two of you are pursuing different fields of studies? Maybe he really had better things to do? Yoongi didn't want to hurt your feelings by making you feel abandoned so he was in fact abandoning you? No? But he said he'll still love you?? Your head was spinning a bunch of thoughts ran through your head.

"Okay Yoongi...if that's what would be the best for us..then okay"

"Don't worry okay? We'll still text as usual, talk when we can okay? I won't let you go, you're still my best friend y/n"

You didn't know if his words would be comforting enough, but at that moment you took what you had and calmed your thoughts for now.

"Okay Yoongi.."

"Good, I have an early schedule tomorrow. I'll talk to you later okay? I'm going to bed now. Goodnight y/n"

"Good night Yoongi"

-----------------------💔------------------------

As it will, Yoongi and you slowly drifted apart. You would often see his social media updates about how he was actively participating in clubs, and how he had taken up new responsibilities, going to camps and hosting events at his institute and he definitely seemed to be doing well. You on the other hand fell more and more at war with your emotions, it didn't hinder your studies. Thankfully you could keep those two apart. But whenever it got a little too quiet you'd think of him, the days in highschool when you were inseparable. You missed his laugh, his endearing way of calling you the most heinous nicknames. You definitely missed his comforting arms, his words of encouragement when you were down, you wished nothing more that in this moment you were crying to him instead of because of him.

You couldn't believe that you were sitting here, broken and feeling alone by the guy that made his way into your life, and had now made his way out in the most painful way possible. You were left there clueless and confused. Did he do it for you? Was it the right thing? Did he really think of you? Why was this happening? What would have happened if you didn't date? Would things be different? Would your best friend have stayed? All these questions playing through your mind, countless nights you spent crying yourself to sleep. Thinking of how you felt almost betrayed, you cursed at yourself for sending texts to him that were only left on read or replied with a simple "I'm busy, text you later".

Slowly days turned into weeks, and weeks turned into months as you hadn't spoken much to Yoongi. You became stone hearted from all that had happened and slowly you got back into yourself. You were more and more active in your college life and you were growing to be better at controlling your emotions. Sure some little things remind you of him now and then, but it was much easier by now to brush his thoughts off. As sadly as your situation was you learned to move with it and not let it consume you. Every now and then you'd see Yoongi piston updates on his progressively active life and you'd feel happy for him, you wondered if he ever felt the same for you when he saw your updates on how well you were doing.

----------------------🍃-------------------------

It had been a total of 4 years since everything happened, you were on a roll and you had graduated college. You had a few job applications pending and you were more stable with your life by now. All the questions you once had were stored in a box collection dust in the far corner of your mind.

It was a relaxing Saturday evening, you were in your apartment lounging on your bed. As you were chatting away with your friends a familiar ping aroused from your phone. The name that popped up on the screen made your heart heavy and you breathing shallow, a true ghost from your past…

"Yoongi 🥀"

Your screen read. Taking a deep breath you opened the chat.

[9:57pm] Hey y/n it's been a long time… are you free tonight? Can I call you?

You didn't know what exactly to think right now. Every cell in your brain telling you not to. That you shouldn't give into him again, and that you should just talk to him over text no matter what it was. But your heart was screaming for him, the familiar feeling of longing for him returning in a massive tsunami, washing over your thoughts. You took a deep breath to centre your thoughts and decided you'd listen to him and talk to him again.

[9:59pm] Hey Yoongi, yeah I'm free to talk.

As soon as the message was read by him, your phone rang. You took one more deep breath and answered the call.

"Hello y/n, how are you?"

You cursed in your head at how much you missed his voice, the way he spoke to you at this moment had a hint of the same longing you had for him.

"Hey..Yoongi, I'm good. How are you?"

"I've been good too.. congratulations on graduating"

"Thanks Yoongi, congratulations on graduating too.."

"Thanks…"

The silence that fell had you both reflecting on everything that happened and how fast it all went by. The box of questions in your mind burst out once again whereas Yoongi on the other hand was feeling guilt and hate towards himself for everything that he put you through. Little did you know that these last few months Yoongi was hit with the hard realisation that he had lost not only his best friend but the person he cared about the most. His family certainly did not improve and the one person who was there for him when he needed it, he had left broken hearted and abruptly once he found a new escape. Yoongi was slowly flooded with memories of you as he neared his own college graduation. He remembered your highschool graduation and how he felt for you there in that moment of time. He spent a few nights crying at the realisation that he had thought of what's best for you but didn't think of how you felt and how he had left things between the two of you.

"Why Yoongi…."

Was all you managed to say out loud before your emotions caved in. Understanding what you were asking he answered.

"I was so caught up in the new environment of growing up and moving on that I did what I thought was the best to not hurt you...but I didn't think far enough that doing so will indeed hurt you.. and I wasn't there for you like i was supposed to. It took a hard hit to my head to realise that I was wrong y/n… you were always there for me and stupidly I made this mistake… I thought i was thinking of the best for both of us, when in fact i was thinking of myself.. I was selfish and I realised that…so many things reminded me of you y/n, the clouds, the sun, the sight of roses, the smell of hot cheetos.."

You giggled a little at his last comment earning a little muffled one from Yoongi.

"I understand if you hate me for what I did to you y/n… and I don't know if it'll ever be the same between us again.. but I'm willing to try to bring back what we had... if you're willing to give me a chance…"

You exhaled softly before letting out everything that you've been feeling.

"I don't hate you Yoongi, I never could and I never will. You're everything to me Yoongi and I was just really hurt by what you did and how you ended things. So many thoughts went through my head and I won't even talk about how much you made me cry….you dipshit" the playful cursing nickname made Yoongi chuckle a little, slowly making him feel reassured at the directions of the conversation.

"I'm willing to give us a chance Yoongi..and you're right, I don't expect it to be the same as what we had, I just hate that I lost my best friend.."

"I know..i understand that..and I'm sorry..for everything"

"It's okay Yoongi, I'm sorry too… maybe I should've been more understanding…"

"Hey… do you.. wanna hang out Tomorrow night?"

"You wanna hang out?"

"Yeah, i wanna see you and catch up with you"

"Sure Yoongi that'd be nice"

"Great!! I'll meet you at the café by our old highschool?"

"Sure Yoongi, sounds great"

"Right then, I'll see you tomorrow?"

"See you tomorrow Yoongi"

You could hear the smiles in each other's voices as you both bid goodnight and hung up the phone. You didn't know what it was exactly but you knew just from that phone call that everything was going to be alright. You felt like you breathed much easier now, your mind much lighter. Yoongi felt the same, he was smiling more now filled with the excitement of meeting you again tomorrow after years.

-----------------------✨------------------------

You made sure to check yourself out in the mirror a few more times before heading towards the café. You had chosen to wear a simple yet stylish outfit, your hair tied back in a low loose ponytail, your short hairs framing your face. You were nervous yet excited to be reunited with your best friend again. And as you approach the café, there he was. Standing outside the door of the café waiting for you. The now slightly more mature looking, dark fluffy haired man, wearing a long black coat was looking just as nervous and excited as he was looking down at his feet.

"I didn't know you needed glasses to see now"

your voice made him turn his head fast in your direction. The moment his gaze landed on you, it felt like highschool all over again. The way you looked standing there, just centimetres away from him. He took in your slightly matured face yet he told himself that you hadn't changed one bit.

"It's official, you're old Yoongi"

He chuckled and playfully scoffed at your comment.

"Well at least i don't dress like the satanic spawn of depression and hot cheetos"

"Sure thing Mr. I'm still a millennial emo teen"

The two of you laughed, and the world seemed to slow down. The feeling that nothing ever really changed between the two of you was knowing, however this time something felt entirely different. Both of you could feel it for sure. It was the feeling of a bond stronger than both friendship and love. You didn't know what the feeling was exactly, all that you knew was that you're never losing each other again. All this while you've been sitting there watching the feelings you had burn and crash in the worst way possible, but today right here at this café, right in front of your eyes you watched everything Begin Again.

#bts #bts fanfic #bts fanfction #bts au #yoongi fanfic #bts min yoongi #min yoongi #bts yoongi #kpop fluff #bts fluff #bts angst

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brelione · 4 years

Text

Please Dont Break My Heart Pt.1 (JJ Maybank X Reader)

Warnings:Not proof read,pretty much trash.

JJ would be lying if he said that he didnt have a thing for you.You were known pretty well as both a heartbreaker and a sweetheart.Neither of those really made sense,it was like trying to mix water and olive oil.It just couldnt happen.You were a kook but werent considered one of the bad ones that would stare in disgust at every pogue they saw.

You were actually known to be quite friendly with pogues,even dating a handful of them.You’d date someone for three months and then drop their asses with no explanation why.It was like clockwork.It seemed like you got bored easily,hopping from one boy to the next.

There was pretty much a line of boys,both kooks and pogues ready to shoot their shot,be yours for three months and then get their hearts broken.Unfortunately JJ could relate,wishing that you’d come up to him one day with that well known smile,shining eyes asking him to hang out sometime.He would consider himself lucky to even be so close to you,to hold your hand and touch your hair whenever he pleased.

Even if it only lasted three months and you were using him he wouldnt even care.He didnt even know why he wanted you so much or what he liked about you.He sat by a fire,Kiara and Pope within his view as he spoke to your most recent ex,a blonde boy named Dylan.He was sniffling,not understanding why you had left him.

John.B say next to JJ,interested in the conversation that was currently about you. “So what’s she like?Is she rude or like...I dunno.”JJ shrugged,trying to form his questions into actual words.Dylan huffed,staring into the flames. “No,man.She’s nice as hell and she’s funny and she dances around her living room and she likes to surf and bake and-and oh god I fucking miss her.”Dylan sobbed,wiping his tears.

JJ had heard the same story from eight guys,that you were sweet and genuine and how they thought they were different from the others until you broke them too.JJ felt bad for them of course but more than anything he wanted to know the reason for your constant heartbreaking and manipulating.He felt even worse because he wanted you to manipulate him.

He tried to listen to Dylan talk,zoning out eventually.Technically he was in the line of guys that were ready to have their heart broken and you probably knew that.That meant that he could be the next boy to be yours.It was wrong of him to think that way and he knew that.He had watched this pattern for two years now,waiting for his turn patiently and never daring to interfere but beginning to think about what would happen this time.He wanted this to be the best summer ever,to have a good time all the time.You could most definitely make this the best summer ever which meant that he needed to be number one in your line.

It had been a week since you broke Dylan’s heart.He was good to you,never yelled at you or treated you wrong.He let you take his hoodies and gave you forehead kisses and piggy back rides down the beach.You were his lockscreen and he was yours,doing whatever you wanted whenever you wanted,including braiding your hair for you and going for swims in your pool at three in the morning.

But he was getting too close to you and deep down you knew that nobody could be that perfect.You didnt want to hurt anyone which was why you let go of them so quickly and so easily,you’d hurt them more if you let them stick around.You didnt even know what your type was or if you even had one,you just needed something different.

You were definitely known for breaking peoples hearts which was definitely not a good reputation to have but it was better than being a drug dealer or a crackhead,both of which had been interested in you at one point.You wanted someone that was more like you,impulsive,excited,ready to try new things and have deep conversations at four in the morning.

You knew that none of the boys were really like that and you knew that they would just act like that in hopes of getting you to like them.There was only one boy that you could think of that fit what you wanted without pretending.That one boy was JJ Maybank.

You were nervous as hell to even look in his direction,knowing that he was probably disgusted by the thought of a rich,heartbreaking kook and wanted absolutely nothing to do with you.You had been single for a week,trying to figure out what to do about JJ.You didnt want to be with him and then leave him,you admired him far too much for that.

But you knew that you wanted to be with him.Kooks and Pogues would stare at you,drool practically falling from their lips as you walked by,waiting to see what you would do next.You sighed,scrolling through your phone,deciding to delete your photos of Dylan,pouting as you did so.You just had to hope that he was over by now,you had let him down gently anyways.

You got up off your bed,deciding to leave the house for the first time in three days,pulling on a black one piece bathing suit,a tshirt and shorts over it.It was 11 AM which meant the beaches wouldnt be crowded yet but luckily you knew your way around The Cut.That included the small rocky beaches that Dylan had shown you during a surfing trip to watch the sunset.

You got into your car,your surfboard already tied to the roof.You stopped at a Dunkin Donuts drive thru to grab a large iced coffee on the way,listening to your playlist as you drove to The Cut.You remembered Dylan taking you down a dirt road that was supposed to be covered in cement but never ended up happening.

You pulled onto the side of the road with a sigh,putting your phone in your backpack that contained a towel and a bag of m and m’s,swinging it over your shoulder and standing on your tip toes so you could pull your surfboard off the top,carrying it by your side as you walked down the dirt hills,coming out at the rocky surfing spot that was well hidden by trees.

JJ shocked himself when he woke up before noon,the others still asleep.He had sighed,debating on getting up or going back to sleep.He wasnt sure what made him want to go to the hidden surfing spot that was a good ten minute walk from John.B’s.He didnt know why he wanted to wiggle his toes in the small,smooth pebbles so badly.

He was already in his bathing suit from the night before,getting up and ditching the idea of surfing,just wanting to swim for a bit.His converse smacked off the dirt,trying his best not to slip and fall on his way down the hill,holding onto the trees for balance before landing onto the pebbles,eyebrows furrowing when he noticed another person was already here.He froze up when he realized it was you,laying on top of your surfboard that rested on the pebbles,arms crossed and eyes closed,not caring about the world.

He considered turning around and running away,grinning when he noticed you werent here with a boy.THat meant that you were still single and nobody was ready to pounce on him if he attempted to talk to you.Your head turned to look at him,scared for a moment when you thought he was Dylan. “JJ?”You asked curiously,sitting up to look at him at a proper angle.

He cussed,realizing it was too late to turn around now that you saw him.He grinned,walking towards you,looking down. “Yeah.”He answered,trying really hard not to grin,trying not to blush or back away out of embarrassment. “Hi.”You answered,staring up at him,not knowing what to say or do. “Hi.”He replied,sitting down on the pebbles across from you.

“So like,what are you doing here?”He asked,trying to make conversation.He was probably the biggest flirt on the island and you were fantastic as manipulating and charming people.Why was this so hard? “I dont know,it’s just a nice day and I thought i’d surf but the waves suck today.”You shrugged,looking out at the calm,glittery water.He nodded,agreeing. “Yeah.You ever surf during a storm?”He asked,tugging at the hem of his shirt.

You grinned,nodding. “Yeah,I tried that once or twice.I wiped out and like,almost died so that sucks for me.The waves were pretty good though,not gonna lie.”You answered,remembering that adventure from a month back.Dylan was so worried the whole time,watching from the beach as you disappeared under the waves,coming back up a few moments later to gasp for air.

“Yeah,same thing happened to me last year.I scraped my whole leg.”He admitted,trying his best not to stare at you.You turned on your surfboard,grabbing your coffee and taking a sip of it.He peeled at his fingernails,considering getting up and going into the water. “Was it worth it?”You asked,making him smile. “Um,yeah id say so.”He replied,his face becoming red.

“I probably should’ve checked the weather before I left the house,its a really shitty day.I mean,before you got here obviously.”You took another sip of coffee,mixing the sugar at the bottom.He was a blushing mess,fighting the temptation to hide his face in his hands. “So um...where’s Dylan?”He asked,wanting to see how you’d react.You let out a sigh,biting the inside of your cheek. “It just wasnt meant to be,you know?”You asked,dissapointed when you realized he was probably just trying to get in your pants.

He nodded,understanding. “Yeah,I get that.How do you know when somethings meant to be?”He asked,slowly becoming more comfortable with you.You shrugged,not even knowing the answer.You had loved people before,you had loved all the people you had dated.You just werent in love with any of them.It just never felt right which definitely scared you.SOmetimes you wondered if you ever would love anyone like that.

“I dont even know,dude.”You admitted,standing up on your surfboard,hopping onto the pebbles,taking off your shirt and shorts,feeling JJ’s eyes glued to you as you bent over to put your clothes into your bag. “But I do know that it’s hot as fuck out here and that water looks nice so im going to go drown.”You grinned before walking down to the water,going up to your hips,letting out a sigh of relief when your burning heels hit the cool water.

JJ admired you from a far,covering his face with his hands when your back was turned to him,grinning like a fucking idiot.He finally decided to get up and join you,pulling off his tank top and hat,dragging his feet through the cold water,standing next to you,glancing over at you every couple of minutes,trying to figure out what you were staring at that you found so interesting.

“What are we looking at?”He asked,not seeing anything.You shrugged,wiggling your toes in the sand. “I dont know,just the clouds I guess.”You answered,looking up at him.He licked his lips,just watching you.He had never been physically close to you for longer than a minute or two even if he felt some sort of emotional connection to you since the moment he saw you.

It was a Saturday night at the beginning of June.A boneyard party was taking place,loud music,shitty beer,heated make out sessions and random games of truth or dare.Everyone was having a good time,doing whatever they pleased and getting absolutely fucking wasted.

JJ had been sipping a cup of beer,trying to listen to Pope when he heard laughter,turning to see where it was coming from.You were on Dylan’s back,your legs around his waist,arms wrapped around his shoulders,afraid you’d fall off.JJ couldnt take his eyes off of you the whole night,watching as you sat on Dylan’s lap,the boy leaving small kisses on your neck,forehead and cheeks.

It made JJ’s heart hurt,wishing it were him.On the other hand he almost wanted to yell at Dylan and call him an itiot for thinking he was different than your ex’s while another part of him wanted to yell at Dylan and try to figure out what made him so special that you spent so much time around him.JJ’s jaw clenched when he watched you kiss Dylan,wishing it were him that you were kissing.When you left the party you were wearing Dylan’s sweatshirt,holding the boys hand and probably going back to your place.

“How’d you find this place?It’s pretty well hidden.”He looked back at the empty beach,trying to figure out if you had walked because he hadnt seen your car.You looked down into the clear water,trying to figure out how far you’d be able to go without slipping under the water.

“Uhh….Dylan showed it to me.”You replied,not wanting to make things too awkward.He nodded,not pushing any further. “I feel like Dylan didnt deserve you not gonna lie.”He admitted.Sure,he had spoken to Dylan before and thought he was an okay guy.He wasnt an asshole but he just wasnt worthy of you in JJ’s eyes.

You giggled quietly at the statement,shaking your head. “You barely know me,JJ.How do you know what I deserve?”You asked,genuinely curious for his answer.He pouted,eyebrows knitting together in frustration. “Alright,here’s what ive learned about you in like,the last fifteen minutes.”He began,a small smile on his face.You nodded,waiting for him to continue.

“So,you like dunkin donuts,you like going on adventures for the experience and you dont really worry about consequences,you like to relax most of the time and I really want to get to know more about you.”He watched your puzzled expression,a nervous grin on his face. “You want to know more about me?How would you do that?”You asked,enjoying how nervous you could make him.

He glanced down to your lips,licking his own. “You know...a date.”He mumbled,chewing on his bottom lip. “You want to go on a date?What makes you worthy of that?”You teased,using his words against him.He rolled his eyes,looking down into the water. “I mean...I dunno,you’ll have to find out for yourself.Do you want to maybe go night swimming or something later tonight?I know a spot.”He offered,remembering the small waterfall that he had gone to with John.B and Pope last year.

You thought about it.JJ seemed sweet from what you knew but it would still be weird to go to a hidden area alone at night with someone you just met.But then again if things went south you could just kick him right in the dick. “Sounds like a date,Maybank.Just come by my house whenever,i’ll drive.”You told him,deciding that you should just leave.

There were no waves to surf or much to do so it would probably be wise to go back to your house and do your laundry and take a shower.His heart thumped in his chest,feeling a bit light headed at the thought of being yours.THere was no way this was real,he thought as he watched you walk from the water,swinging your backpack over your shoulder,getting your shoes on,holding your board and disappearing into the trees and out of his view.

He had rushed back to John.B’s,looking through every single shirt and every single pair of shorts that he had there,trying to find a good combination.He couldnt wait for John.B to wake up,shaking him by the shoulders until he was swatting the blonde’s hands away.

“What?”He asked,sitting up in his bed. “Its my turn!”JJ exclaimed,not helping with the confusion. “What?”John.B asked again,making JJ sigh. “God,keep up!Its my turn to be hers!”JJ was far too excited for his tired friend,the words sounding like static. “Who?”John.B asked,not thinking.JJ rolled his eyes,grabbing his friend by the arm and into the guest room-JJ’s room.

“Which outfit should I wear?”JJ asked,gesturing tot eh outfits he had laid out on the bed.He had waited over a year for this night,he shouldve prepared an outfit the moment he heard that you and Dylan had broken up. “I dont fuckin know.I dont know what girls are into.”John.B yawned,JJ’s eyes widened as he realised the problem,running into the living room to shake Kie back and forth.

“What?”She grumbled,too tired to open her eyes. “God,fuck.”JJ cursed,throwing the girl over his shoulder and bringing her into the room,her shouts becoming annoying when he finally set her down. “Which one?”He asked,looking at the outfits.

“For what?”She asked,looking down at the clothes. “Dammit!Im going on a date tonight and I cant mess this up.”He sighed,tugging at his hair. “A date with who?”Kiara asked,not quite understanding.JJ wasnt the type to go on dates.What had changed? “(Y/N).”JJ answered,making Kiara’s heart drop. “Are you kidding?Come on,JJ.You know whats going to happen!”She exclaimed,her words changing nothing.

“Does it really matter?”He asked,really just wanting to know what outfit to wear.Kiara smacked his arm,clearly mad. “Shes going to break you like she does to everyone!Why her out of all people?Cant you find a girl who’s not a play?You guys are just going to play eachother and hurt everyone!”She exclaimed,John.B nodding in agreement. “Oh,vomit!”JJ exclaimed,making the decision for himself,folding the clothes carefully and placing them on the bed.

“Im serious,JJ!She’s gonna pretend to love you and then you’re gonna fall in love and then shes gonna break you and come running to us!”Kiara shouted,sighing loudly.JJ simply rolled his eyes,kicking his two friends out,deciding he no longer needed their opinions.He tried on the outfit,jean shorts and a gray kildare t shirt,figuring he could wear his red hat with it.

He was far too nervous for tonight.He had heard about you going on a date once only for it to go nowhere,never seeing the boy again.The boy was Max,a seventeen year old brunette that went to boneyard parties and had dropped out of highschool during junior year.JJ let his curiosity get the best of him,asking about it. “So how’d it go?”JJ had asked,sipping his beer.

Max sighed,shrugging his shoulders. “I think I was too nervous the whole time,she just wasnt really into me.She kissed me though so I think it was worth it.”Max grinned at the memory.JJ found himself thinking about you later that night as he always did,thinking differently this time.

He wanted to know what your kisses would feel like,if they were gentle or rough and where you would put your hands.He saw you kiss Dylan before,your hands in the pockets of the boys’ shorts or in his hair.JJ had imagined what that would feel like,even attempting to lucid dream but everyone knows he isnt patient enough for shit like that.

Night time came way too quick.He had showered,trying to make his hair nice for you even if he was going to place a hat on top of it anyways.His hands were gripping onto the bathroom sink tight,breathing in and out slowly,trying to remain calm before getting dressed,putting on all of his rings.

He knew where your house was.It was one of the biggest houses on the island and the driveway was painted with clouds,rainbows and mermaids so it was easy to find.He ran down the dark streets,hoping nobody would call the cops on him.He walked up your colorful driveway,stopping when lights came on across the front yard.

He didnt know what set them off,wondering if your parents knew he was coming.THe door opened,revealing you in a yellow dress,the material only going halfway down your thighs,a leather jacket hanging off of you,black and yellow vans to match.

He felt his face go red,biting his lip. “You look really-um you look really pretty.”He chuckled,feeling embarrassed.You grinned,opening the garage by typing the pin into the key pad,your black car sitting there and waiting patiently for you. “Where are we going?”You asked,taking out your keys,about to get in when he stopped you.

“Can I drive?”He asked,giving you puppy dog eyes.You sighed,holding your keys tight,eventually giving in. “If you crash my car I will kill you.”You warned him,getting in the passengers seat that you hadnt sat in in forever.He got in,almost laughing.He had never been in such an expensive car before,pulling out of the garage,the door closing behind him.

“Seriously though,if we crash I will kill you.”You spoke seriously,making him smile. “I know,princess.”He replied,beginning the drive down the smooth road,hitting bumps once the tires rolled into The Cut.Somehow you ended up holding his hand,your thumb resting on one of his veins,the coolness of the metal rings made a slight shiver go up your spine.

He tried so hard not to squeal,imagining this for nearly two years.He rubbed the back of your hand lightly with his thumb,trying his best to remain as calm as possible,pulling over in the familiar area. “It’s right down here.”He told you,squeezing your hand lightly before letting go.

THe two of you got out of the car,your heart beat quickening as you followed him through the woods,using a flashlight that he had brought.You could hear the waterfall,glad it wasnt too far away.THe two of you emerged from the trees and into a clearing,a slow moving rive right in front of you,a small waterfall to your right.He was focused on you,watching as you took it all in,the area being lit up by the little bit of moonlight.

You took off your jacket,unzipping the dress to reveal a white bikini underneath,placing them on top of your bag so they wouldnt get wet or dirty.He smiled,tugging off his shorts and t shirt,walking into the cold shallow water,knowing where the deep parts were.

You came in soon after,deciding to just sit in the shallow water while he jumped off the rocks and into the deep,coming up to the surface with his hair soaked and fallen into his face.He wiped it away,coming to sit next to you,admiring the waterfall. “So…”He tried to start a conversation,not quite knowing what to say.You smiled,looking over at him.

“What?”You asked,your voice soft and smooth as you spoke.He leaned back in the water,not quite laying down. “So whats up with you?”He asked,reaching for your hand,smiling when you let him intertwine his fingers with yours. “In what way?”You asked,curious as to what he meant. “I mean you’re like,the Queen of the kooks yet you date pogues and hang around The Cut.Why?”He asked,his heels digging into the pebble below him.

You shrugged. “I mean,kooks aren't really impressive.They’re all the same,you guys have actual personalities.”You laughed,hoping he wouldnt ask the question you dreaded most.He nodded in agreement,sitting up properly.The light crashing of the water wasnt really noticeable anymore,he was too focus on the conversation.

“I want you to tell me everything I should know about you within the next minute.Go!”He exclaimed,watching as you tried to think,surprised. “Um...um okay,my favorite color is (Y/F/C),I hate strawberry jelly,I have a dog named Hugo and hes literally the love of my life...I have slight caffeine addiction,I dont know.”You laughed,not ever thinking about this before.He nodded,urging you to keep going.

“Uhh...my favorite show is Stranger Things,my favorite movie is The Outsiders because Dally,obviously...umm I still believe in mermaids and i’ve always wanted to build a castle.”You hoped that was enough,glad when he smiled.

“You still believe in mermaids?”He asked,a goofy smile on his face. “Shut up,Maybank.This isnt fair,you have to tell me about you now.”You turned on your side,facing him completely.He looked shocked,not thinking that you would turn the question back on him. “You have a minute-starting now.”You announced,his thoughts moving to fast for his mouth to keep up.

“Okay,ummm...uhhh….I’ve always wanted to live in Yucatan,my favorite color is blue...I dont have a favorite TV show...I like the Harry Potter movies but i’ve never read the books...growing up I always had a huge crush on Hermione and I believed in Santa Claus until I was twelve.I hate butterflies,I dont really like coffee because energy drinks are better and I go by JJ because I hate my actual name.”He finished,biting his lip.

You hummed,reflecting on what he just said. “Im a simp for Draco Malfoy.”You admitted,hearing him chuckle. “So you have a thing for blondes?”He asked,a cocky smirk on his face.You shushed him,rolling your eyes. “I mean,i’ve got a thing for gorgeous girls so I guess it works out.”He winked at you,a sly smirk on his face.

You felt your cheeks get hot,glancing away from him.He thought about what he was about to do for a whole two seconds,considering how it could effect his future with you. “(Y/N).”he mumbled,making you turn back to him.He waited a moment and a half before leaning in,pecking your lips lightly and pulling away,understanding why Max had spoke so fondly of the memory.

You bit your lip,pulling him into another kiss,your warm hand going into his wet hair,tugging at the slightly wavy locks.He smiled into the kiss,his hands ending up on your waist,trying to take in every detail of the moment that he knew would end soon.When you pulled away your hand remained in his hair,twirling it between your thumb and pointer finger.

@nas-marie-loves-u @28cnn @sexytholland @yuxsh06 @ifilwtmfc @cherryobx @poguestarkey @n1ghtsh4d3-67 @poguestyleskye @judayyyw @sunwardsss @meaganjm @sarcasticsagittarius1998 @jj-fic-recs @homophobicclownmoviestan @jj-iz-bae @natalie-kate-98 @negativity4you @nxsmss @ofmaybankheart @broken-jj @outerbongs @copper-boom @httpstarkey @teenwaywardasgardian @drewswannabegirl @simonsbluee @jiaraendgame @khiaraaa-in-spacee @on-socks-off

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itshardcandy · 4 years

Text

Hot ‘n Cold

Kim Namjoon x Reader

(Written for a writing game by @letsgetitinbusan)

6059 Words

Genre: Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Smut

Warnings: Consumption of Alcohol, Swearing, Unprotected Sex (Wrap it before you tap it, kids), Outdoor Sex, Vaginal Fingering

Summary: A camping trip takes an unexpected turn

Preview:

“You feel much warmer already.”

“Mhh, you are helping a lot with that.”

“I think I noticed. Good to know I can be of assistance. It’s getting quite hot in here, don’t you think?”

Bliss. Overwhelming and all-consuming bliss clouded your mind when you walked out the door of the lecture hall you just took your last exam of the semester in. Making your way through the crowd of students towards the nearest exit you hurried out of the building knowing you wouldn’t have to set foot in that hellhole that dares to call itself a university for the next beautiful, fun-packed, exciting 8 weeks of summer break. On the way back to the dorm, fully immersed in your phone, you suddenly felt a large hand gripping your shoulder. Hurling around, the grinning face of Namjoon, your friend and next-door dorm mate, appeared in your view.

“Guess who got himself full marks on their last project of the year?”

Namjoon exclaimed practically beaming with elation and pride.

“Hmm let me think… Must have been that dude you hung out with last week, right?”

You said teasingly, pretending to think hard to guess the answer to this, truly very difficult, question considering the genius mind of your friend.

“No, silly, it’s me of course.”

Namjoon rolled his eyes and continued.

“Anyway, how was your exam? Any more luck this time?”

“Ugh, I wish. It was a disaster, my brain feels like it’s been sucked out of my head. I’d be surprised if I actually passed though knowing my prof, I highly doubt it. That man just can’t teach a class for the life of him. It’s an outrage he has the audacity to have us take an exam on that waste of a time his lecture was if you ask me.”

You rambled on frustrated but continued jokingly.

“I might have to borrow that big juicy brain of yours next time so I have an actual chance to succeed.”

“Ready to get wasted at the camp tonight then, I assume?”

“Hell fucking yeah I am.”

Laughing, you both continued down the paved road leading to the big grey building that was your dorm. Dragging yourself up the numerous sets of stairs you asked yourself for the thousandth time why exactly you’d thought picking a room on the 5th floor of a building that has no elevator was a good idea. Well, at least you had the best crackheads you could wish for as neighbours so that was something, you thought to yourself. Over the years you had lived on that floor, you and the others had bonded over your shared struggles of living in that falling-apart building and the uncountable tragedies that unfolded within those walls, including that one hot summer in which the rusty, ancient water pipe burst and thus none of the inhabitants had running water for two weeks straight. Out of that emergency situation a new tradition was born with all of you packing your essentials and riding your bikes down to the shore and going camping every summer during semester break.

“Bet Jungkook hasn’t even started packing?”

Namjoon said and knowing his room mate, you agreed.

“Better help him then, we should leave as soon as possible so we can secure our spot at the campsite. I don’t trust people these days, that spot is getting popular and I’m not taking any chances.”

With a last wave at him you unlocked your door and disappeared into your apartment. Ever since your former room mate and parter in crime had moved out earlier that month you had the flat to yourself and you still weren’t accustomed to having that much space for your stuff. Sadly, your flatmate had moved across the country meaning she couldn’t take part in the camping trip this year.

Scanning your possessions, you skilfully grabbed various items and articles of clothing you’d be needing for the next few days and threw them on the bed. After ticking everything off of your imaginary list, you began packing the pile of things into your backpack.

Not much later and after checking your groupchat to make sure that everybody was ready to go, you left your room and walked down the corridor meaning to knock on the door on the right. It immediately opened and Yoongi appeared in the frame, manoeuvring his belongings into the hallway.

“Good to go?”

You asked to which Yoongi hummed in agreement. You descended down the staircase together carrying your equipment.

“Is Jimin downstairs already?”

You wondered, since Yoongi’s room mate was nowhere in sight.

“Nah, he still got that dance performance with Hoseok this afternoon. They will join us later this evening.”

“Right, right, forgot about that.”

In front of the building Namjoon, Jungkook and Taehyung were already loading their luggage onto their bikes. When everybody was done you set off on your journey revelling in the beautiful feeling of freedom awaiting you at the camping site. After a good hour you turned into the path leading towards the clearing at the beginning of the small forest by the shore. Upon arrival Jungkook immediately spotted the car that was parked right beside the track.

“How does he manage to be here first every time? I swear he does that on purpose just to rear me up.”

Jungkook whined at the sight of his brother.

Pausing the unpacking of his luggage from the trunk of his car, Seokjin greeted you all with a wave and a big smile.

“Great! You made it just in time to help me unload the tents.”

“Speaking of, we need to agree on sleeping arrangements since a certain someone managed to rip theirs last year.”

Yoongi said and all eyes lingered on Namjoon who looked at the ground in shame.

“Let’s see… We got four tents. That means Taehyung and Jimin in their tent and Yoongi and Hoseok will share one, I guess? Then me in my tent and Y/N in hers. Which means Namjoon and Jungkook will have to seek shelter in one each. Any preferences?”

Jin spoke and looked at the two tent-less members of the group.

“I don’t mind sharing the tent with Y/N. Uhh... I mean if she doesn’t mind of course.”

Namjoon said quickly and you couldn’t help but chuckle.

“Fine by me. As long as it’ll still be in one piece by the end of this trip.”

“Great, that’s settled then. Little brother, the honour of sharing a tent with this handsome guy is all yours.”

Jin said exaggeratedly gesturing at his face which Jungkook could only answer with a grimace, seeming a lot less excited about said fact than his brother was.

You busied yourselves to take the tents out of the trunk of the car and searched for the perfect spot to put them up. You walked across the clearing examining the ground thoroughly with Namjoon following behind with your tent under his arm.

“What about here? We’d get some shade from that big oak tree right there and it looks like the ground is as even as it can get.”

You asked and Namjoon agreed.

“Perfect. You really have a good eye for that. Remember the first time we went camping and you and your room mate placed the tent directly above a molehill?”

Namjoon laughed and you snorted at the memory.

“Please don’t remind me, I got the shock of a lifetime when suddenly something tried to make its way in from underneath the tent. Never screamed so loud in my life.”

“I remember you woke us all up thinking you were getting stabbed or something. Scared the shit out of me.”

Namjoon said and started setting the tent up. Since he was very skilled in putting the pieces together, you didn’t have to do much besides holding the poles up for Namjoon to drape the fabric around. After a few minutes the mission was accomplished and you looked pleased at the joint achievement.

“I’m really glad you picked me to share a tent with. Without you I would have been struggling a lot more to get it set up.”

“Well thanks for trusting me enough to let me into your holy cave.”

At that remark you stopped dead in your tracks and burst out laughing then turned to Namjoon with an incredulous look. Namjoon who seemed to have realised just now how much of an innuendo his comment had been covered his eyes with his right hand shaking his head in disbelief.

When the others were done setting up their tents, Taehyung and Jungkook began collecting some wood and stacked it into the fireplace that had been built in the middle of the clearing. The rest of your group took seats on the logs that were placed around the firepit and unpacked the food that you had brought. Jin and Namjoon took it upon themselves to act as masters of the meat and impaled sausages with some thin sticks to roast them over the fire. By the time the first batch was done, Hoseok and Jimin finally arrived and were greeted with shouts. They joined the jolly round busying themselves to some well-deserved dinner.

After you had devoured the sausages Hoseok whipped out a box containing some crackers, a bar of chocolate and a bag of marshmallows out of his backpack.

“Nothing better than some S’Mores when camping, am I right?”

Hoseok asked and handed the box around letting everybody grab some for themselves.

Jin nudged Taehyung in the shoulder who sat on his left and asked him to accompany him to his car. When they made their way back to the rest of the group, they were carrying bottles upon bottles of Soju.

“At the last wedding we catered for, those people ordered way too much alcohol and they refused to keep the leftover bottles so naturally I found a convenient solution to that problem and persuaded my boss to leave the good stuff to me. Not even he can resist my charms I assume.”

Jin told you and overall cheers complimented him.

“Awesome Jin, you working at a restaurant really has its perks.”

You said approvingly and happily accepted the bottle of peach flavoured Soju Taehyung handed you over.

While the supply of Soju slowly shrunk and the pile of empty bottles grew, your mood became more light-hearted over time and you all reminisced in the memories you had made over the years. Slowly but steady the sun set and it got darker. When the glowing red ball of light had finally disappeared completely behind the horizon Jimin and Hoseok declared that they were tired and proceeded to get ready for bed.

“That dance performance really makes itself felt now. Maybe I have to admit that I’m getting older.”

“Don’t worry Hobi, it took a toll on me as well. But at least we know we gave it our all.”

Jimin said and stifled a yawn. The two headed to the cabin at the edge of the clearing that contained a rather humble bathroom but at least it offered a tank of fresh water so that was something.

Gradually one after the other decided to go hit the hay and bid the remaining few people goodnight. When only Namjoon, Jungkook and yourself were left sitting around the fire, the three of you decided to play a drinking game resulting in Jungkook getting so drunk that he had to throw up. Namjoon hurried towards the bathroom in the cabin to get some water while you comforted Jungkook. You grabbed a napkin and wet it with the fresh water Namjoon had brought back and began cleaning around Jungkook’s mouth wiping the nasty residue from his face. Unfortunately, a lot had already dribbled down onto his shirt.

“I think you should get that thing off. We can wash it tomorrow but for now just change into a fresh shirt.”

You said to Jungkook and helped him out of the soiled piece of clothing. Jungkook who couldn’t control the movements of his limbs properly, let his right arm snap back after retreating from the sleeve of his shirt resulting in hitting the container of water Namjoon was still holding. A splash and Namjoon had gotten the majority of water over his chest. Cursing he let the now empty container fall to the ground. Namjoon tried to wipe some of the water off his body but it was useless, he was drenched. You laughed at the sight. It reminded you of a puppy who had just received an unwanted shower.

“We should get you to your tent so you can rest. Do you feel a bit better now?”

You asked Jungkook and he nodded. Namjoon helped you escort Jungkook to the tent he was sharing with Jin and made sure he got in alright, closing the entrance behind him.

Back at the fireplace, Namjoon stood by the flames as near as possible trying to get them to dry his shirt but the fire had already died down significantly so it didn’t really work. Resigning, he lifted the wet fabric above his head and threw it next to himself on the log. You couldn’t help but give him a sneaky glance. You had always thought of Namjoon as really handsome but something about him revealing his wet chest so shamelessly to you hit different.

“Do you wanna stay up or go to sleep as well?”

Namjoon asked and caught you off-guard in the act of looking him up and down, your eyes lingering on his chest a little longer than necessary. Flustered you directed your eyes away and shook your head.

“No, I wanna stay up, I want to enjoy this as much as possible.”

“You talking about my body or the night in general?”

Namjoon joked and you secretly asked yourself the same question. You proceeded to grab one of the last bottles of Soju and took a sip so you had an excuse not to answer.

“Want one as well?”

You asked and seeing him nodding, you handed him one of the bottles. After the first gulp he scrunched his nose looking appalled. Checking the label, he felt his worst suspicions confirmed.

“You gave me one of the flavour-less ones! What do you take me for – an animal? What have I done to you to deserve such torture?”

You laughed feeling not as sorry as you maybe should have as Namjoon looked really funny being so disgusted by his beverage.

“Sorry, I couldn’t see well and just picked the one nearest. Want a different one?”

You took a close look at the three remaining Soju bottles and gave Namjoon an apologetic smile.

“I’m afraid they are all plain as well. Seems like I got lucky and picked the last grape flavoured one.”

“So that’s what I get for trusting you. I feel betrayed.”

“Um do you wanna share mine? I don’t mind, I’ve had enough alcohol anyway.”

You offered your bottle to Namjoon and he didn’t hesitate to take it, chucking his own bottle away. How could he turn down such an offer when it appeared so temptingly? Taking turns emptying the drink, you sat in comfortable silence just listening to the occasional sound of the woodland creatures nearby and gazing up at the night sky. Here in the middle of the forest without all the street lights and neon signs lighting up the night, the stars were clearly visible and shone bright and clear. You loved the night sky, so naturally you were gazing upwards totally lost in the twinkling lights of the millions of stars.

You didn’t notice the lingering eyes of Namjoon who was admiring how the moonlight illuminated your silhouette. When exactly he had caught feelings for you, he wasn’t quite sure. All he knew was that it somehow happened and when he finally came to terms with that, he was already crushing hard and even though there had been the occasional teasing and ambiguous situation he still didn’t think there was more to it than just that. You had been friends for ages so anything beyond that was surely out of the question, right? Therefore, he hadn’t given it much thought but the way you had looked at him when he took off his shirt didn’t go unnoticed and Namjoon couldn’t help but wonder if there was a possibility that he wasn’t the only one who had developed a crush over the years.

“Do you ever wonder why we are here on this earth?”

Namjoon was pulled out of his thoughts by the sudden question. You looked at him and continued your philosophical train of thought.

“I mean look, there are so many stars and planets up there. Why out of all places do we exist on this one? And think about it… The moon and the stars are so far away but we still see them. They are so huge we can actually see them from here. Isn’t that amazing?”

Before Namjoon could answer you rambled on.

“And we are so small. We are so small, Joon, why are we so small? So insignificant? The stars shine so bright even after they had died but we are just dead, just rotting. Why do I even bother accomplishing anything when in the end it means nothing and everyone will forget that I even existed?”

You finished and stared at Namjoon. The sight of you looking so desperate and sad devastated him.

“Y/N… That’s not true and you know it. You are so loved by your family and your friends. You could never be insignificant and of course the people around you will remember you. Please stop thinking so lowly of yourself, I can assure you, you don’t have to worry about that.”

“Th-thank you… I suppose I had to much Soju, I’m sorry you had to witness me spiralling into another existential crisis.”

“Don’t be sorry, that’s what friends are for, right?”

“Yeah… friends.”

You mumbled and looked up at Namjoon. Your eyes met, holding the gaze for a bit longer than expected before Namjoon cleared his throat.

“So, do you wanna go to bed? It’s getting quite late.”

“Hmhm yeah it’s getting colder, as well, now that the fire went out.”

You shivered suddenly at the cold air of the night, missing the warmth the fire had provided. Namjoon stood up and checked the fireplace to make sure it was really gone out so you wouldn’t accidentally set the whole forest on fire while you slept. You collected the remaining bottles that were scattered around the firepit and added them to the already remarkably high pile of bottles you had all emptied together. Finding the way to your tent turned out to be a lot more difficult, now that it was almost pitch black. You stumbled over a root that was sticking out of the ground and could only save yourself from falling by gripping onto Namjoon’s wrist tightly. He swayed back at the sudden weight pulling on his arm but managed to steady himself in time.

“Are you alright?”

Namjoon asked concerned and turned around. You were still holding onto his wrist but had found your balance again. When you let go of his arm Namjoon held his hand out to you.

“Wouldn’t want for you to trip again. Really, why don’t you wear your glasses more often? Couldn’t read the label on the Soju bottle, couldn’t see that big root. Honestly I’m surprised you managed to survive without getting into any serious accidents yet.”

“Come on it’s not that bad. And I hate my glasses, I look stupid wearing them.”

You scoffed. You hated your glasses with a burning passion but were too lazy to go get new ones that you would actually consider wearing.

“You don’t, you look cute with them and not stupid, at all, but if you prefer to stumble through life like a mole squinting at everything then suit yourself, I guess.”

“Thanks, I will. Besides, I wouldn’t want to miss out on the chance of being escorted to my humble sleeping accommodation by my chivalrous saviour now, would I?”

You said cheerfully and took Namjoon’s hand. You continued the short walk towards your tent. When you’d reached it, you opened the zipper and crawled inside and Namjoon followed you straight. Leaving your shoes in front of the entrance you slipped out of your pants. You made yourself comfortable in your sleeping bag while Namjoon rid himself off his jeans and tucked himself into his sleeping bag as well.

“Joon, can you hand me the water bottle? I feel like a raisin, all that Soju dried me out beyond measure.”

Namjoon felt his way through the items popped into one corner until he found the requested bottle.

You took it and quenched your thirst, downing almost half of the bottle in one go.

“Hey, leave me some okay? You’re not the only one who’s thirsty.”

You reluctantly stopped gulping down the water and held the bottle out in the direction of Namjoon. Since it was almost completely dark inside the tent, Namjoon had problems to make out the bottle causing him to hit it with the back of his hand. With a shriek from you the bottle flew out of your hand and landed on your legs, letting the water flow all over your sleeping bag.

“Y/N I’m sorry, I’m so sorry! Did you get wet, is it bad?”

Namjoon apologized and pat his hand over your sleeping bag to see how badly he had fucked up but all you could do was laugh, being already so used to his clumsiness.

“It’s okay, really. But I won’t be able to sleep in that thing, it’s soaked and it’s getting cold tonight.”

“No worries, you can sleep in mine. It’s my fault that yours is wet, after all, so that’s only fair.”

“Don’t be ridiculous, you’ll be freezing.”

“I won’t, I can stand the cold better than you, so just take mine and go to sleep.”

In the end you didn’t want to argue and the thought of sleeping without a cover wasn’t that enticing either, so you just got out of your wet bag and threw it out of the tent. When you wiggled into Namjoon’s sleeping bag which was a lot more spacious than yours and conveniently was already preheated by Namjoon. You felt the overpowering fatigue that set in and quickly slipped into unconsciousness.

After a while, you woke up at the sound of teeth chattering. You turned around only to see Namjoon laying curled up into a ball and shivering.

“S-sorry, did I wake you up?”

“What the fuck do you think you are doing? Do you want to freeze to death?”

“It’s f-fine, don’t worry. Just get back to sleep.”

“Fine my ass. Do I look stupid to you? Come here, your sleeping bag is a lot bigger than mine. We might have to squeeze a bit but I think we can both fit.”

You opened the zipper and shuffled towards Namjoon. When he had squeezed himself in, he tried to close the sleeping bag but it was no use.

“Doesn’t matter, just leave it open. It’s better than nothing isn’t it?”

You said and Namjoon turned around only now realizing just how close you were.

“God, how are you not frozen solid yet, you are ice-cold!”

“Not everyone can be as hot as you.”

You let out a small chuckle and pressed yourself closer to Namjoon’s body, making yourself comfortable as the little spoon.

“Then I’ll try to make you hot, as well, lying beside a fucking block of ice truly is no fun.”

Namjoon thought you had no idea how right you had been about making him hot. While the two of you had occasionally cuddled during movie nights at the dorm, nothing came close to just how close you were now with nothing between you, except for your underwear and your shirt. With you next to him and the added warmth of the sleeping bag around, Namjoon started to defrost and soon he was engulfed in the warm feeling, ready to fall asleep but he was too aware of your body pressed into him. It really wasn’t necessary for you to push your ass that far into his groin, he thought. It was almost as if you were doing that on purpose just to drive him crazy. But maybe he was misinterpreting everything and he would make a fool out of himself.

As if on cue Namjoon felt you move your body just a bit, letting yourself grind into him slightly. Throwing all caution over board he put his arm around your waist pulling you even closer and letting his hand rest on your stomach. You let out a satisfied sigh and proceeded to move yourself against him. The friction had its effects on Namjoon who noticed himself hardening, very aware that you must feel it too since his boxers barely concealed anything. You however, were finally content that your actions bore fruit. You had been sure of the potential that lay in yourself and Namjoon to be more than just friends and you were determined to find out if you were right about that during this camping trip. Sharing a tent was the best opportunity you could have wished for and considering the very noticeable bulge you felt being pressed into your back from behind you had been right with your assumptions.

“You feel much warmer already.”

“Mhh, you are helping a lot with that.”

“I think I noticed. Good to know I can be of assistance. It’s getting quite hot in here, don’t you think?”

You said and took off your shirt to throw it to your feet. You then turned over now facing Namjoon. He was taken aback by this sudden change and could feel your breath on his bare chest. You placed your hand onto his stomach and slowly progressed to explore his toned body.

“How exactly do you think this is helping us to cool down?”

Namjoon asked, sucking in his breath when you let your fingernails graze the side of his upper body.

“When did I say I wanted to cool down?”

You asked quietly, tilting your head up so you could meet his gaze. This was enough to convince Namjoon that he was allowed to act upon his feelings. He let his hand rest at the back of your head and leaned forward until your lips finally collided. He pulled you closer to himself and you wrapped your arms around his torso. The kiss became more heated and Namjoon let his tongue poke through his lips so you parted yours to let it in. When you had to let go of each other to be able to breathe again Namjoon stared at you, having to process for a moment if this was actually happening. With a huge grin you threw yourself onto him again to continue the kiss. Namjoon’s hands wandered up and down your back brushing against the straps of your bra. You felt his finger hesitate on the hooks of your bra.

“Go on – open it.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, oh my god, do you need a written declaration of consent?”

You giggled at how considerate he was being.

“Just wanted to make sure so you won’t hold it against me later.”

He smirked and with one move of his fingers he had opened the bra and pulled it away from underneath your body. Within seconds you found yourself turned over so you were laying on your back with Namjoon on top of you. With one hand he propped himself up to not crush you completely while his other hand immediately found its way to your breasts. Namjoon kissed you once more before he let his mouth trail down your chin and neck leaving hot kisses on your skin. You had closed your eyes revelling in the addictive feeling when you felt a sudden burst of pain shooting up from your breasts causing you to let out a surprised moan. Namjoon had pinched your right nipple with the hand he was using to massage your boobs. You opened your eyes in shock and found Namjoon smiling mischievously up at you. He had been keeping his eyes on you to observe how you reacted to his actions and was visibly enjoying himself. Letting his hand travel down to your stomach resulted in his face being conveniently positioned exactly over your breasts so he didn’t hesitate and began to caress them with his lips. Namjoon sucking on your tits while simultaneously exploring your still covered pubic area with his free hand had you aroused in no time and you could already feel your panties getting soaked from the movements of his hand, which Namjoon also didn’t fail to notice.

“Seems like you can get me wet in more than one way.”

You said referring to the accident earlier and Namjoon couldn’t refrain from laughing causing his body to vibrate which let his fingers move against your crotch in a delightful manner.

“Well, I know which way I prefer.”

Namjoon said when you let out another moan. He hooked his finger into your panties and pulled them down, so you lay before him completely undressed. His hands caressed your thighs for a bit until he put light pressure onto them to spread them open for him to kneel in-between. You suddenly felt the imbalance in your levels of being undressed, so you sat up catching Namjoon’s lips in a needy kiss while letting your hands palm his hardened length through his boxers for a moment before pushing the unnecessary piece of clothing down his legs so both of you were equally nude. Namjoon pushed you back to lay down again and you obliged. He let his one hand return to your breasts while the fingers of his other hand slid through your slick folds.

You didn’t want him to feel neglected and reached down so you could wrap one of your hands around Namjoon’s dick. Though your grip was only light, Namjoon let out a groan of pleasure at the sudden sensation. Encouraged by his response you slid your hand up and down his shaft and let your thumb graze over his tip every other time using the leaking drops of pre-cum to lube his length up. Namjoon stopped moving his fingers through your folds only to enter you with one finger a moment later. You let out a quiet mewl at the unexpected sensation. You kept your gaze on him, mesmerized at how Namjoon had closed his eyes and thrown his head back in pleasure when you had sped up your movements on his dick.

“God, Y/N, that feels so fucking good.”

Namjoon said letting out a sharp breath when you grazed his tip another time. Keeping up the pace Namjoon had set pushing in and out of your wetness he soon added a second finger. You whined at the delicious feeling and started speeding up jerking off Namjoon. When you felt the movements of his fingers getting unsteady you stopped only for Namjoon to shoot you a questioning look.

“Don’t give me that face. I don’t want you to finish now when the real fun hasn’t even started yet.”

You said and raised one of your eyebrows teasingly.

“But I don’t have any condoms with me. Do you?”

“Don’t worry, I’m on birth control, don’t you remember?”

“So, you are sure you want this?”

“Jesus, Namjoon, just fuck me already.”

You laughed, a little desperate by now.

Namjoon let out a low growl, your words being music in his ears. He moved his body back up to lay down next to you and involved you in another steaming kiss. Namjoon grabbed you by your waist and helped you get up. Straddling him, you sat on top of him and bowed down to kiss him again. He lifted your hips just a bit so he could position himself properly. With a last look into your eyes he lowered you down letting himself enter you slowly. You gasped at the wonderful sensation.

When Namjoon had pushed his length completely into you he held still for a moment to let you get accustomed to his size before he started moving your hips back and forth. When you began moving your hips yourself, with your hands placed on his chest for support, Namjoon moved his hands from your hips to your chest. Setting a steady pace, you began riding Namjoon, totally lost in the pleasure and Namjoon thought he had never seen you look more beautiful. He continued to massage your breasts and pinch your nipples occasionally which caused you to feel the familiar knot form in your stomach.

“Fuck, Joon, I’m close.”

You gasped out between moans and dug your nails into his chest. Namjoon felt himself near his orgasm as well but he was determined to finish second. He held onto your hips again and lifted you just a bit so he could thrust his hips into you from below giving you the chance to let yourself go completely.

“Don’t hold back, baby. I want you to come all over my dick.”

These words combined with Namjoon thrusting into you was enough to send you over the edge. Letting the waves of hot pleasure roll over you, you came undone moaning Namjoon’s name. Seeing your face of pure ecstasy and hearing his name come out of your mouth did it for Namjoon and he let his orgasm overwhelm him.

Panting, you both came down from your orgasms. You let Namjoon’s dick slide out of you so you could lay down again besides him. Smiling at each other like complete idiots you tried to catch your breath.

“I can’t believe it took so long for this to happen.”

“Well. I didn’t think it would happen at all. I thought you’d never see me as more than a friend.”

Namjoon responded and you looked at him in disbelief.

“Are you serious?? Kim Namjoon, you might be a genius on paper but when it comes to flirting you suddenly lose all ability to think.”

You laughed and Namjoon joined you.

You noticed the tiredness starting to set in again so you cuddled up to Namjoon and closed your eyes. You felt Namjoon place a kiss on your forehead then drifted away with Namjoon falling asleep soon after.

In the morning, you woke up from the blinding sunlight flooding the tent and heating it up even further. With your eyes still closed, you went over the events of the previous night smiling to yourself. When you opened them, you stared into the brown eyes of Namjoon.

“Morning sleepyhead.”

Namjoon said and scrunched up his nose when you poked him in the stomach.

“You know it’s creepy to watch people sleep?”

“I’m sure you can make an exception?”

“Hmm, kiss me and I might think about it.”

You grinned and Namjoon happily did as told. Since the morning sun made it almost unbearable to stay inside the tent any longer, the two of you got dressed and you tied your dishevelled hair up into what you hoped would look like an intentionally messy bun. When you crawled out of the tent you saw Hobi, Jin and Yoongi already sitting around the fireplace having some sandwiches for breakfast. Upon joining the others, Namjoon and you were greeted with knowing looks.

“Ah, finally, the two night owls grace us with their presence.”

Hobi said jokingly.

“Did you sleep well?”

Yoongi asked with a cheeky smile while raising his eyebrows.

“Yeah, we somehow all woke up because of some suspicious noises in the middle of the night. You don’t think you know where they came from, by any chance?”

Jin continued amused.

Namjoon tried not to make eye contact with them and instead preceded to scratch himself at the back of his head.

“Ah come on, now you’re being shy? Last night you didn’t bother if someone could hear us.”

You said and slightly bumped Namjoon in the side with your elbow, earning laughter from the other boys.

“It’s still embarrassing...”

Namjoon mumbled but relaxed himself and grabbed one of the sandwiches Jin had held in his direction handing you the other one.

When Namjoon placed a quick kiss on your cheek before taking a bite off his sandwich you thought that this year’s camping trip was definitely going to be your favourite so far and the fun had just started.

#bts #bts fanfic #bts smut #kim namjoon x reader #kim namjoon x y/n #kim namjoon x you #bts Namjoon #hardcandywriting #kim namjoon

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currywaifu · 4 years

Text

𝐭𝐢𝐭𝐥𝐞: you can have half 𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩: hyodo juza/reader 𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠: sfw 𝐰𝐜: 3.0k words, 2 images

𝐚𝐧: my first a3! fanfiction

He was in three of your classes. Three, and not once have you gotten the chance to talk to him! Granted, you never took the initiative either but after a few months, you’d think some kind of pair or group activity would pop-up to help you out.

The two of you were even in the class with the highly-acclaimed (by the student body) matchmaker professor, and either you were too subtle with your pining or weren’t interesting enough because not once has she tried to pair you up with him, or anyone for that matter.

Seriously, what does one have to do to get close to Hyodo Juza?

There wasn’t a particular moment you could pinpoint when you fell for Juza, but rather it was an accumulation of things that got you more and more attracted to him.

His cool and tough exterior first caught your attention, from the way he dressed to his purple hair. It didn’t help at all that he was extremely attractive to you.

Then you started noticing more things about him, like how polite he was to the professors, or the tiny smile he wore when he ate the anmitsu from the school canteen, or when that one upperclassman handed him some mochi, or when the photography-club senior gave him a box of pocky.

Juza being a sweets lover? Isn’t this what they call ‘gap moe’? Ahhh, your poor heart.

“That’s it!” You exclaimed to yourself excitedly, sitting up from your bed so quickly your head hurt slightly.

“I’ll give him some sweets as a conversation starter!”

Easier said than done.

“Isn’t it awkward to just give sweets out of nowhere to a guy?” You whined, hiding your face with your arms and laying your head down on the table. Your friends sighed for the nth time within the past hour, patting your head comfortingly as the two of them looked at you incredulously.

“It’s normal to confess feelings through sweets though?”

You jolted your head back up to look at the girl. “And who said I was gonna confess?”

The disbelief on their faces increased tenfold. “You’re not?”

Grimacing at the volume of their voices, you looked around to see if anyone was paying attention. By the history books section, you locked eyes with the librarian who paused putting back returned books to glare at your table, causing you to give an awkward smile in return.

Right, library. Inside voices.

“I wanna become friends with him first, but I’m too much of a wimp to even approach him huhu…” When the two girls don’t respond, you turn to the direction where they were staring straight ahead. A slight heat spread throughout your chest and into the roots of your hair.

“Omg, yankee Barney is here.” Choking on saliva, the speed at which you turned away probably gave you whiplash.

“I was gonna go with Dibo the Delinquent Dragon, but I like yours more.”

The two crackheads were stifling their laughter and looked like they were moments away from bursting out and getting themselves kicked out of the library. “Shut up! Let me wallow in my misery in silence.”

“Oh? Since when did Elmo get so dramatic?” Feeling your face heat-up and redden further, you stood up to leave.

“I’m gonna get strawberry milk from the vending machine, go talk shit without me.” You groaned, only staying long enough to hear them laugh as loud as they could without getting caught.

...

There was only one left, and you were the only one in line. How lucky was that? You waited for the machine to do its thing and drop the milk carton through the chute.

Except it wasn’t doing its thing. Odd. Should you stick your arm in the slot? Shake the machine? Kick or punch the glass? Ask someone for help? All of the above, in that order?

Fate had decided for you.

“You, do you need help?”

Holy holy holy-

Hyodo Juza was behind you! And he was talking to you!

Okay brain, here’s the game plan. Turn around, casually ask him for help, thank him, introduce yourself then continue the conversation from there!

Except you decided to make like the vending machine and malfunction.

“I- uh- yes? Please?”

Fuck, you probably sounded dumb. What kind of first impression is this? That response would probably get you intimacy points close to none. You went outside to cool down but weren’t the heat levels rising again?

He stared at you for a second, before quickly looking away and kicking the machine. Ahh, wasn’t that really cool? He crouched down, sticking his hand through the slot before handing you the carton.

“Strawberry milk…”

It looked like he was glaring for a second, but wasn’t he staring because he actually liked the flavour? He was holding out the drink to you, but you hastily pushed his palm back towards him.

“Thanks! You can keep it since you helped me with, you know. The machine! Okay, see you in class Ju-san!” You spoke quickly, before swiftly fleeing the premises.

Back in the library, you let your head fall down on the wooden surface. “You look like crap, what happened?” Letting out a pitiful whimper, you look up at them with a pout ready on your lips.

“He probably thinks I’m weird now…” The two girls exchanged a look with each other.

“Not that you aren’t, but what you do boi?”

“Ju-san…” He murmured quietly, palming the pink and white milk box in his hand. He sat in the dorm’s living room, wondering what he should do.

Juza’s seen you before in a couple of his classes. You always sat somewhere in the middle beside your friends, taking down notes and asking questions when needed. Other than the fact that you were a hard worker, he didn’t really know anything else about you.

Until the fateful encounter today.

At first, he thought you were scared of him from the way you froze up like a mannequin. Then you turned to him, not looking afraid but definitely a little faint and red-faced. Were you sick?

That didn’t explain how you just rushed off without your drink, and that odd nickname.

Ju-san.

“Juza? Are you okay?” Flinching a bit, his eyes met with Omi’s concerned amber coloured ones.

“Omi-san, I’m fine…” He replied, doing little to convince Omi who proceeded to sit down next to him.

The strawberry milk was still sitting in the purple-haired boy’s hand.

“Are you not gonna drink that?” The brunet didn’t say it aloud, but both of them knew what he meant, ‘It’s not like you to just save it for later, so something’s up.’

“Someone gave it to me.” If the 4th year student was surprised, he sure didn’t show it. Instead, he gave a smile as if he knew this would happen eventually.

“And then? Why don’t you want to drink it then?” It probably wasn’t cold anymore if he had it since class hours.

“It’s not that… it feels…” Juza trailed off, looking for a word that would describe their chance meeting.

“Weird?” Omi supplied, but he shook his head. No, that wasn’t it.

“Sudden? Confusing?”

“Both of those, I think. Also, Ju-san…”

The brunet’s ears perked up at the nickname, almost believing he misheard it. Was this Ju-chan 2: Electric Boogaloo? Ah, Juza attracts cute people, doesn’t he? Can it be that cute people see through that toughness and see his softer side? It’s certainly true with Juza’s cousin.

“So they called you that, huh. Ju-san because Ju-sa sounds like Juza?”

Said person ignored him, unaware of the pink on his cheeks. Being a good mother senpai, Omi decided to help him out. Since Juza’s been delaying drinking the milk, he probably thought he didn’t deserve a free drink out of nowhere. That was an issue with a quick and easy fix.

“I’ll help you give them something in return on Monday.”

That was enough for Juza, who finally ripped the little plastic packet and poked the straw through the carton hole.

For a lukewarm drink, it tasted particularly good today.

You spent an hour last weekend praying to a couple deities that you could start over your first meeting with Juza. Not only that, but didn’t you end up calling him something weird?

You were walking to class when your friend leaned in closer, voice quiet so only you could hear. “Alert, yankee Barney is approaching. I repeat,”

“Don’t repeat.” You mumbled, not having the nerve to respond further, watching as he slowly neared you.

“Hyodo-san? Did you need something?” His mouth twitched at that, before handing you a purple tupperware.

“For last Friday. You can give the container back tomorrow.” You stared at the purple-haired man in shock, before accepting the gift.

“Thank you, Hyodo-san. I’ll be sure to enjoy it!” He lingered for a moment, waiting to see if you’d say something else, before nodding and walking past you and your friend.

Did that just happen?

You didn’t even realise your friend had stepped away from you until she came back running and shaking you with a magnitude strong enough to make a tree collapse.

“I thought you said he was gonna think you’re weird and shit! The fuck is this then?”

“Wait hoe I’m still shookt, let me check.”

Lifting the lid, the contents inside made your mouth water, and you wouldn’t be eating lunch for another 3 hours! Cookies! The torture of having to wait to consume them. Well, one couldn’t hurt?

Delicious! And the crisp, the size, the texture- all of them were to your liking.

“Hoh— isfh— so goo—“

“Oh look, there’s a note. While you’re greedily eating your heart out, let me read it.” Your friend pointed out, before unsticking it from the plastic lid.

“Juza felt bad for the free strawberry milk, so I helped him prepare something to show his thanks. I hope you enjoy. P.S. Ju-san? That’s cute.”

You almost choked, your friend wildly patting you on the back. “What’s this? A note from his mom or something?”

“Ju-ju-san…” You muttered in embarrassment. So he did pay attention to that! Not only that, but he even told someone about it? Well, that wasn’t your biggest worry right now.

“Isn’t this too much just for one strawberry milk? I have to find a way to repay him back!” Your friend narrowed her eyes at you, before shaking her head.

“Why do I feel like this is gonna be the start of a strange back-and-forth between the two of you?”

The next day, you handed him back the purple tupperware.

“Open it, it’s my favourite from the bakery two streets down.” You told him, doing your best to mask your shyness before walking away.

As soon as you left, Juza opened it to find a slice of red-velvet cheesecake and a disposable fork inside. He’ll eat it for dessert later. As he was about to close the lid, he noticed the cute sticky note designed like a strawberry.

Thank you for the cookies, they were really good! I passed by a bakery last night and thought you’d enjoy this!

You signed it off with your name, and he realised that he never knew it until then.

He said it quietly, testing out how it sounded.

He sighed, staring at the library door which you exited from.

The school canteen had some delicious milk bread, but don’t they sell strawberry shortcake on Wednesdays?

…

Wednesday, you delightfully ate a slice of strawberry shortcake which came with a plain white sticky note with nice calligraphy from Juza.

On Thursday, Tsuzuru found Juza eating dorayaki while reading something on a pastel blue paper.

Friday came, and the usual purple tupperware had two Castella cake slices and a lined paper, clearly ripped from his notebook, folded and taped to the lid.

Juza wondered if it would stop by next week and be handed an empty tupperware, but a surge of courage must have overcome you because Monday came with brownies and a note.

I don’t want you to keep ripping pages from your notebook. Do you have Inste? Discord? If you’re up for it, I can message you there instead. Otherwise, my number is…

He placed the paper with your socials somewhere he wouldn’t lose it.

...

Monday night arrived when you got a text from an unknown number.

This is Juza.

What a simple message, but somehow your heart fluttered. Your phone dinged again when you got a follow notification on Inste. Scrambling to follow him back and check out his posts, you didn’t know whether to laugh or be amazed when you saw that the posts there were purely promotional for MANKAI plays, some of which he wasn’t even in.

You took a screenshot of the image of him with the vest and purple tie and asked about the play.

It may not have been in person, but that marked the longest conversation you’ve had with Juza so far. Somehow the two of you went from talking about acting to food, to hobbies and complaining about teachers and before either of you knew it, it was midnight.

A couple days pass by and its Thursday night when people notice a change in Juza. Particularly, his phone habits.

“He’s not as bad as Itaru, Banri, and Kazunari but…” Tsuzuru trails off, looking at Omi who only seemed amused.

“He’s been spending a lot of time talking to someone is all.” The two of them turned their heads back to the first year as he let out a small laugh.

Three weeks in the food exchange and the two of you began having actual conversations in real life. It started when he handed you the purple tupperware, asking how you were and how your weekend was.

It somehow resulted in the two sitting together during classes, and having lunch together when Omi and Tsuzuru were busy.

You began to wonder who would break the streak.

You were running late. Maybe it was a bad idea to rush an essay worth a good chunk of your grade in the span of 8 hours, but somehow you managed to complete it at 3 am.

Thank god for online submissions. You wouldn’t be able to stand a noisy printer at this hour.

After plugging in your laptop and phone to make sure it would be fully charged before classes start later, you flop onto your bed to take a well-deserved rest.

When you woke up, it was 11 am.

Shit, you just missed a 3-hour lecture. Shit raised to the power of two Juza was in that class. Would he be worried that you weren’t there?

It looks like you’ll be the first to turn in an empty tupperware.

Still, you have a plan B prepared.

...

Juza was worried. When you messaged last night you hadn’t mentioned being sick at all. Had something happened? Sure, he didn’t get to message you that much over the weekend because of increasing practice hours but you’d definitely say something.

Omi and Tsuzuru eyed Juza as discretely as they could. No purple tupperware, no wonder he was upset. It went unsaid, but it clearly stopped being about the surprise desserts every other day and more about the person giving them.

“Ju-san!” An unfamiliar voice reached the former two’s ears, but the latter was clearly well acquainted with it based on his reaction. All three men turned around to see you, smiling and holding out Juza’s favourite food.

It was anmitsu with cream, specifically the one from the campus canteen.

“They wouldn’t let me put it in the tupperware, but will you accept it anyway?”

Did he look like he cared where the anmitsu was placed? Sure, it made him happy that despite skipping a class she still remembered to get him something, even more, his favourite dish, but…

“You didn’t show up to class a while ago.” Juza was frowning. You knew he usually gave off an angry disposition, but this was different.

“Sorry, I was up ’til 3 am and forgot to turn on any alarms, haha.” He sighed.

“So the goodnight text then was-“

“A lie so you wouldn’t scold me for it, which obviously didn’t work in my favour.”

Having previously failed to notice the two upperclassmen, you turned to greet them, introducing yourself as Juza’s friend. “Sorry to disturb your lunch.”

Omi smiled. He introduced himself, as did Tsuzuru. So this was his troupe mate’s special friend. “Not at all. Have you eaten? You’re welcome to join us.”

Too tired to protest, you thanked him and sat down beside the purple-haired boy. “I just rushed here without eating, actually. Oh, I should probably get my lunch-“ You proceed to stand back up, but a firm hold of your arm from Juza stops you.

“You can have half.” He says, sliding a lunch set with a serving size you didn’t even know the university provided.

“What?”

“You slept through breakfast time, too. We can share.” He insisted, clearly not accepting no for an answer.

You take the unused chopsticks and begin to prod at the side dishes. “Fine, but now I owe you something. Should I get you banana milk from the vending machine?”

Juza looked away for a second, eyes hesitant as he glared at the anmitsu instead of you. When he looked back, he seemed to be filled with resolve.

“Then watch me… Autumn Troupe’s next upcoming play, I mean.”

For a moment you felt heat beginning to encompass your body, but quickly tried to shake it off. Of course Juza meant his acting.

“Obviously I’m watching it. Opening night and closing night, if I can help it.” You insisted. As if you would miss the chance to see him on stage. Sure, your massive crush on him wasn’t gonna go away any time soon, but to be able to see him do something he was extremely passionate about?

“Quick, help me finish lunch already so you can enjoy your anmitsu, Ju-san.”

...

The two of you somehow forgot the presence of Omi and Tsuzuru, both of whom were listening to your conversation intently.

“Then watch me? Seriously, lines like that can be interpreted…”

“I think we’ve become the third and fourth wheel, Tsuzuru.”

want to order again?

#a3!#a3! act! addict! actors!#hyodo juza #juza hyodo #a3! juza #cafe: dessert menu #a3! game #a3 juza #juza x reader #a3 actor training game #reader insert

201 notes · View notes

sukkadeservedbetter · 5 years

Text

It’s Different.

Pairing: Tom Holland x Reader

Summary: After a dramatic and traumatizing experience at a gas station, things with Tom hit different.

Warnings: Mugging/Robbery

Word Count: 2.6 of fluff

You’ve always been oddly comforted by the smell of gasoline. Anything that smelled like a car garage had always left you with a sense of euphoria: new tires, exhaust pipes, and metals. It wasn't something you could really explain, but as the faint smell of gasoline entered your nose after a horribly long day at work, you welcomed it.

Your mother always told you not to let your mileage gauge get below 50 miles, but you never listened to her. Tonight you got to the gas station with 10 miles left. Tempting the fates was becoming a little hobby of yours—at least when it came to getting gas. Mainly because you hated pumping gas. It wasn't hard, or even a lot of work, but you always realized you needed gas at the worst possible times. Like tonight, for example. You didn't have anywhere to be, but you were tired. You debated whether you wanted to prolong getting into your comfy clothes tonight or wake up earlier tomorrow in order to fill your stupid car with gas. In the end, prolonging rest now seemed a whole lot better than waking up any earlier than you needed to tomorrow.

You begrudgingly dragged your exhausted body out of your car. It wasn't all that late, but the sun had gone down behind the hills and a faint wind nipped at your neck and cheeks. Summer was officially over, but the remanence of long, warm nights hung in the faint pink glow of the horizon. You scrolled through your phone mindlessly as your car's tank filled agonizingly slowly. You heard your mother's voice telling you that you should always wait in your car while pumping gas at night, just in case. You shook off her words. You lived in the sleepiest part of L.A. where nothing even remotely interesting happened. It was all families and Instagram models here—not crackheads and gangs.

The gas pump clicked, letting you know you were finally done with this heinous chore. You placed the pump back in its holster and finished up paying on the pin pad. As you pivoted on your left foot to turn around and hop into your car, you felt cool metal press against the back of your skull. Your throat closed immediately. The pounding in your chest became overwhelmingly loud. Your ears rang and everything began to slow. Whoever was behind you spoke, but you couldn't hear anything.

They teach you about the "fight or flight response," but they never tell you about the third reaction in response to fear: freeze. You wanted to scream, or run, or kick, but you couldn't do anything. Your lip began to quiver as you cursed yourself for never listening to your mom's advice. The person behind you grabbed onto your arm so hard you yelped.

"Shut the fuck up!" The voice yelled. It was deep and gravely. "I said, give me your money and I won't have to use this." You heard the sound of his gun cocking and you let out a silent wail.

"I don't have anything," you plea, putting your hands up to show you were literally empty-handed.

"Do you think I'm a fucking idiot? Where is your purse? In the car? Walk." The man shoved you towards your car. Your mind raced with possibilities of how to get out of the situation. You quickly realized that you were either going to have to give him your money or he would shoot you and there was no in-between. For a moment you let yourself hope that someone would save you in a damsel-in-distress moment, but you knew that real life wasn't a fairytale, and knights in shining armor were far and in between in L.A.

The man turned you around and shoved you against your car door causing you to wince. When you saw his face you let out a sob. He was wearing a Spider-Man mask. Your mind went straight to Tom. You and Tom had been friends for years. You knew he was kind and good, but you couldn't help but associate him with the mask and that made this situation so much worse.

"Now, give me your money so I don't have to blow your fucking head off," The man sneered. You gulped as you turned around to open your car door. The man placed a harsh hand on your hip as you bent over to reach for your purse. Your throat closed up again thinking about what he might do after you give him the money. You grabbed both your debit and credit card out of your wallet. In a stroke of dumb luck, you remembered something from a John Mulaney special you had watched with Tom a while back.

"Here. Fetch!" You yelled as you turned around and chucked your cards as far away from yourself and the car as you could. The man shoved you into your car, causing you to hit your head, as he ran towards your cards which were now scattered about 20 yards away. You slammed your door shut and drove away quickly, hoping he wouldn't shoot towards your speeding car. You felt numb. Your body shook as you drove. You wanted to go home and sob, but you knew you had to go to the police station first.

The police station took forever. You sat in a boring room that was too bright and too cold as you listened to a policewoman talk you through the process of filing a report. You weren't fully there and if she had asked you to repeat what she was saying you wouldn't have been able to. After what seemed like forever, the police let you go. You got in your car and stared forward mindlessly. Where were you supposed to go? Home was the obvious answer, but you didn't want to go back to your dark and lonely apartment after what had happened. Every time you blinked you saw Spider-Man holding a gun towards you.

You realized that you wanted to see Tom. Tom always knew how to make you feel better and after being terrorized by someone who looked like Spider-Man, Tom's happy-go-lucky attitude and soft British voice was something you craved. You checked the time to find that it was nearing 11:30. Tom might not even be home, but you didn't care. You considered calling him first, just to see if he was home, or wanted to see you, but you were already outside of his apartment before you could truly comprehend that you were heading to him.

You stood with shaking hands outside of his building. As you pressed the call button for his apartment, you became instantly anxious. What if Tom didn't want to see you? What if he had someone over? What if—

"Hello?" Tom's voice rang from the speaker. You let out a shaky sigh of relief. At least he was home. "Hello?" Tom asked again.

"Oh, uh. Hi, Tom..."

"(Y/N)? What're you doing here?" He didn't sound upset, just confused.

"I, uh... can I come up?"

"Yeah, of course!" The door buzzed and clicked open. You pushed the ornate gold handle and began bounding up the stairs. You should've taken the elevator in your state, but you didn't want to wait. Your heart was pounding as you climbed to the ninth floor. By the time you got to Tom's apartment, you were out of breath. You took a moment to compose yourself before you knocked. Tom opened the door with a sideways smile. Upon seeing his face you immediately crumpled into his arms and started sobbing. You hadn't processed what had happened yet, but seeing Tom all soft and warm in his hoodie and sweats made you feel safe.

Tom grabbed you just before you hit the floor and wrapped you into a tight hug. You knew he was probably scared and confused, but you couldn't stop crying long enough to explain yourself. You were ugly crying. There were snot and tears coming out of and your jagged breaths made you feel as though you could vomit. Tom didn't say anything he just rubbed your back and pulled you onto his couch.

"I'm-- I'm so... so sorry," You choked out.

"Shhh, it's okay," Tom comforted. "It's alright, Darlin'." Even upset that pet name made your heart swell. "What's going on?" Tom asked. You took a few seconds to gain some composure. You sat up and wiped the tears from your face as best you could. After a few seconds of uneven breathing, you began to tell Tom what happened. His brows furrowed and his grip on your thigh tightened as you told him how this stranger attacked you.

"I didn't mean to bother you so late I just... I didn't know where to go," you said as you concluded your story.

“No, it’s okay! I’m glad you can here. You’re always welcome here. You know that.” Tom pulled you in for another tight hug. You breathed in his cologne. The familiar scent sent your brain back to last spring when the two of you couldn’t keep your hands off each other. Tom wasn’t just a friend—or he was, but with benefits. Two years ago after a bad break up and a lot of tequila the two of you first hooked up. After that, it became custom for the two of you to get together whenever you were both single and in the same place. It wasn’t constant and both you had been in and out of relationships since you first hooked up, but when it happened it happened—no questions asked. A part of you often longed for something more, but at the end of the day, you were just happy to have someone like Tom in your life.

You looked up at Tom through glassy eyes. You wanted nothing more than to kiss him. Tom had always been good at reading you even if you swore you had a great poker face. Tom placed two fingers under your chin and tilted your head so that your lips met his. It was a soft kiss, nothing particularly special, but behind it was all the care in the world and it was mutual. You break apart after only a few seconds.

"I hope that makes up for that asshole using my likeness to mug you." You let out a shaky laugh.

"It did. Thank you."

"I cannot believe the wisdom of John Mulaney came to you in your moment of crisis," Tom laughed.

"Actually, I think it was Detective J.J. Bittenbinder's wisdom," you teased. As you moved to sit completely upright you winced.

"You okay?" Tom asked, suddenly worried.

"Yeah, yeah. I'm good. That guy just rattled me around a bit. I'll be fine." You were lying. You would be fine, but your hip and back and arm hurt like hell and you didn't want Tom to worry.

"Okay..." Tom said, obviously still unsure. "Do you want to shower? It'll help you relax."

"Yeah, that would be really nice." Tom helped you up from the couch. You followed him to his bathroom with his hand interlaced in yours. You forgot how attractive an attentive/over-protective Tom was.

"You can get in. I'll go grab you a towel," Tom said. You didn't really respond so much as nod, but you knew he knew that you meant, "sure, thank you." You quickly stripped yourself of your clothing and stepped into the steaming water. You winced and cowered away from the water as it hit your forming bruises. You looked down at the marks on your arm and hip which were already red and swollen. The faint outline of fingers traced over your hip. Looking down at the marks, you wanted to cry again, but you knew that there was no point.

You heard the bathroom door open again and could just see Tom's figure from behind the fogged-up glass door. You closed your eyes and let the water pour over your face. When you opened your eyes again Tom's figure was closer to the door, but this time it was devoid of clothing. The door opened and Tom stepped in silently. You turned around to face him.

"Hi," You whispered.

"Hi. This okay?" Tom asked. You nodded, but you suddenly felt the need to cover yourself. You couldn't figure out why you felt so exposed. Tom had seen you naked plenty of times, but this felt different. This was so much more intimate. Normally when you were naked in front of Tom alcohol was involved and during the times it wasn't your exposed body was veiled by the haze of lust and need. Now there was nothing to conceal your skin or your bruises.

Tom's eyes immediately went towards the mark on your arm. He lifted it up to see the bruise better and felt like you could see his heartbreaking as his face crumpled at the sight. "Baby..." he whined, pulling you in for another hug. Your breath caught in your chest at the pet name. Tom never called you 'baby' except for during sex. You (along with most other girls) were always 'love' or 'darling", but this time he called you baby. It felt different.

Your wet body pressed against his. You had never showered with Tom. It was nice. It wasn't sexual like you assumed it would be. In fact, for once, Tom wasn't trying to make an intimate situation sexual at all. Tom pressed a wet kiss to your forehead. "I'm so sorry," he said against your hair.

"It's fine," you mumbled back. Tom turned you around so that your back was now against his chest. You felt his fingertips skim over what you assumed to be various bruises on your back. Without warning, Tom brought his lips down to your shoulders and peppered open kisses across them. He brought his arms around your waist and you bit back a huge grin. Either subconsciously or out of habit leaned your neck to the side to give Tom better access to your neck. Rather than giving you a hickey like you expected him to, he pressed a soft kiss to the exposed skin and turned your head back to meet his lips.

This kiss was different than the kiss you shared on the couch. This kiss was slow and deliberate. Tom slipped in just enough tongue to give you the chills. You could've stayed in that moment forever, but you knew all too well that all good things must come to an end. After what seemed like hours you and Tom stepped out of the shower into the foggy bathroom. Tom wrapped a towel around you, kissing your forehead again in the process. You internally groaned at the thought of putting your jeans back on and going home. Like always, Tom was one step ahead of you.

"Do you want to stay?" Tom asked, but it wasn't like he normally asked you. Something in his voice was different. "I could stay on the couch if you want the bed to yourself, or you could have the couch. I just..." He was nervous.

"You don't need to sleep on the couch," You said, calming Tom's nerves. "You just have to let me borrow a t-shirt."

"Deal." Tom handed you one of his shirts. You slipped your panties back on and let Tom's shirt engulf your figure. It smelled like him. By the time you were finished drying your hair, Tom was already in bed. He was awake, but barely. You slipped into bed next to him and kissed his cheek.

"Thanks, Tommy."

"Of course, (Y/N)." You had ended your nights so many times in the same way in Tom's bed, but when he wrapped his arms around your waist and kissed your shoulder, something felt different.

——

A/N: This is loosely based on an experience I had a few months back and while getting gas I got inspired! Lemme know what you think :)

#tom holland #tom tom #tom holland x reader #tom holland x you #tom holland fic #tom holland fan fiction #tom holland blurb #tom holland fluff #tom holland smut #tom holland fan fic #tom holland imagine #harrison osterfield #peter parker #peter prker fic #spiderman

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pemini · 5 years

Text

Masked | Mark Lee

「 every ‘what if’ and ‘I wish’ amounted to him 」

⇢ Word count: 3,103

⇢ Genre: fluff, comedy, some angst

⇢ Warnings: swearing, fire

⇢ Pairing: Spiderman!Mark x reader

You have always been a terrible cook. Your mother's failed attempts to teach you how to cook rice back when you were thirteen brought that to light. The first time, the rice burnt to literal ashes, and the next, it was barely edible. At sixteen, you tried baking a cake for your best friend Donghyuck’s birthday, only to end up being seconds away from burning your house down. It was no surprise to anyone, but yourself, when one of your culinary endeavors really did result in flames. It was in your and Donghyuck’s shared apartment, at the age of nineteen.

You and Donghyuck had known each other since you were born. The two of you proudly boasted that fact with the framed pictures of both of you in diapers, bathing in the same tub, celebrating your birthdays together and graduating highschool in the same class all placed around your apartment and hung up on your walls. In first grade, Donghyuck became friends with Mark, resulting in great jealousy on your part, because Mark was “stealing” your best friend. That problem solved itself, and the three of you became inseparable. Mark made frequent appearances in the pictures around the house, as well as your apartment itself, since he spent more time in it than in his own. Despite your apartment being his second home, he refused to live with you and Donghyuck, partly because you were both extremely messy and loud, but also because he knew he would “get sick of you” if he saw you that frequently. At least, that’s what his excuse was.

Mark was an extremely busy nineteen year old. In fact, you would argue that he’s too busy for a nineteen year old. With him being a biochemistry major, it was no surprise. His apartment was littered with notes and diagrams and he rarely left his home without at least one of his textbooks, in case he had some time to do some extra revision. On top of all the studying, he always seemed to be at the gym. It was almost as if his own home was a pit stop between school, the gym and you and Donghyuck’s apartment. It was never a surprise when he cancelled on study sessions and arcade hangouts last minute, at some point you stopped asking why and simply blamed it on his busy schedule.

It was just past sunset when you decided to bake cupcakes, for no particular reason but sheer boredom. Donghyuck was holed up in his bedroom playing video games and Mark was too busy to come over, leaving you to entertain yourself. You looked up a recipe online, making sure to add “for beginners” at the end of the search. After all, you weren’t completely unaware of your talent for messing up your cooking- but, you were optimistic. Hence, you choosing to bake for fun in the first place. Two hours of “perfecting” the (awfully clumpy) batter later, the tray went into the oven. You patted yourself on the back for your efforts, and smiled at the thought of the perfect cupcakes that you would rub in Mark and Donghyuck’s faces in half an hour. Five minutes later, you were sprawled out on the couch, fast asleep. Not long after, your slumber was interrupted by Donghyuck’s frantic screams and the deafening sound of the fire alarm. The kitchen was in flames. Donghyuck was emptying water bottles on the growing fire while shouting at someone on the phone. He was a great multitasker.

“That dumbass tried baking and fell asleep, who the fuck does that? She hasn’t even woken up.” You bolted up from the comfort of the couch, now in complete panic, and began running around the two bedroom apartment in search for a fire extinguisher. You could hear Donghyuck’s obnoxious voice over the blaring fire alarm and the sound of the approaching firetrucks, which did not help your case.

“I am literally going to burn to death because I’m roommates with a crackhead who can’t cook, I’m going to die, Mark, this is how I die-“ In the midst of his rant and water bottle emptying, his sleeve caught on fire. His voice had already risen up three octaves and his water bottle supply was proving useless, and now the poor boy was on fire. “Y/n- Oh my God, where the fuck are you?”

“I found the fire extinguisher, I’m coming- fuck, wait-“ You screamed back, scrambling into the kitchen and tripping over your own feet. You looked up to see Donghyuck flailing around wildly, which would’ve made for great entertainment if you weren’t trapped in an oven.

“Hurry up I’m on fire I’m burning I’m going to die- Mark! He hung up, I’m going to die alone-“ Just as you began extinguish him, you heard the sound of shattering glass, followed by the sound of the door being busted open as firefighters stomped into your apartment.

You froze in place, the orders barked by the firefighters barely processed in your mind, the smoke settling into your lungs and your watering eyes proved to be too much of a distraction. Your breathing had long sped up, shortened and frantic, you could barely see your own hands amidst the smoke. Just as you were about to break into full panic, you felt a pair of steady arms wrap around your waist. Mere seconds later, you were lifted off of the ground in someone’s arms, with your cheek flush against their chest. You were faced with New York City’s landscape, the buildings that towered over you were now at face level. The night was no darker than usual; not quite moonlit, yet not as artificial as it seemed to be. For a second you could see the silhouettes of strangers inside the buildings surrounding you, the potential wonder of “can they see me to?” Had no time to be fulfilled, as you closed your eyes and screamed as if it would change the fact that you were already midair. You were dangling between buildings in the strangers arms, not flying, just dangling. You held your savior closer, mumbling prayers for safety.

“You okay?” The male chuckled. His laugh reverberated through his chest, eliciting chills in your entire body. The familiarity of his voice silenced you. It was warm; soothing, almost making you forget about your situation. You finally took a moment to breathe before opening her eyes, only to be greeted by a vibrant mask.

“What the fuck,” You exhaled, studying the mask’s large white eyes and its web detailing. “you’re Spiderman?”

“Yes, I’m Spiderman.” He giggled. “And you are?”

“I am a big fan.” You let out a clumsy combination of a sigh and a giggle, “and you’re Spiderman.”

“Yes, I think we’ve already gone through that.” Just as those words left his lips, the wind stopped blowing through your hair and the comforting pressure of his arms around your waist ceases. He gently placed you back on the ground, and although you failed to notice the close proximity, you were mere centimeters apart and his hand lay resting on your waist. You forgot your arms still laying on his shoulders with your fingers tangled behind his neck, too distracted by the warmth of his body and the faint outline of the eyes behind the mask. As well as the shock of being meters above the ground and caught in a fire minutes earlier.

“What the fuck?” Donghyuck’s voice snapped you out of your daze. The hand on your hip suddenly felt heavy, as well as your newfound awareness of your arms around the superhero’s neck. Both of you hastily pulled your hands away from each other, placing them awkwardly at your sides as you turned to Donghyuck. “So, you’re telling me that the Spiderman had the time to save you out of a burning building, but I was left to burn to death?” He pointed his finger accusingly, first at you, then Spiderman, and then placed it solemnly on his chest. You reminded yourself not to roll your eyes- just to save yourself from another influx of drama.

“I have two hands, and I doubt you would’ve enjoyed hanging onto my leg.” He laughed, stretching his arms as he spoke. “Besides, you look fine!” The way his shoulders shook when he laughed could’ve given you deja vu. His movements, his scent and the wight of his arms that were once around you formed into an unknown syllable at the tip of your tongue. It was as if you’ve collected every puzzle piece, yet couldn’t fit any of the pieces together.

“Sure, whatever. I’m gonna go call Mark so he can pick us up. We’re staying over at his place tonight.” Donghyuck said. He looked you up and down, smirking to himself. “Too bad you can’t get changed.” Your eyes widened the second you looked down at what you were wearing. Your oversized 2011 Justin Bieber t-shirt with matching purple pajama bottoms and crocs were your go to stay in outfit. In your defense, you could have never predicted that your kitchen would light on fire and that Spiderman would break in and save you. Yet in that moment, you still deeply regretted buying those pajamas back in 2011.

Much to your discontent, Spiderman directed his attention to your clothing as well, laughing. “I know I just saved you out of a burning building and all, but are you really wearing crocs?”

You scoffed, lightly pushing his chest. “They’re comfortable! You’re wearing spandex.”

Just as he was about to reply, the song Love Yourself by Justin Bieber started playing. Right from his spandex pocket. Spiderman glanced at you briefly before he took the phone out of his pocket, reluctantly answering the phone call. The syllable caught in your tongue turned to a word, the puzzle pieces slowly clicking together. You could hear Donghyuck’s voice on the other end, talking about staying over for the night.

“Mark?” He turned to you at the mention of the name, telling Donghyuck he would be on his way and ending the call. His head was hung low as he took a few steps closer to you.

“That’s me.” His replied. The confidence that radiated off of him ceased, instead replaced by tense shoulders and fidgeting fingers. “Can we talk somewhere else?”

The walk to wherever Mark was taking you was silent, an unusual contrast to almost every moment you spent together. Mark was in a constant fit of giggles over something you said or did, and vice versa. Every conversation you had led to another, and you were both convinced the you would never run out of things to talk about. Every word between you was already said, except for three words you kept dear to yourself. Mark meant a lot to you, more than you would like to admit. At some point, you considered it almost embarrassing how big of a role he played in your life. The situation in which you met was nearly as awkward as this one- the cliche ‘guy spills coffee on a girl in a café, promises to make it up to her, they end up as lovers’ trope- except, you were not lovers. Although, the line between best friends and lovers was terribly blurred in everyone else’s eyes, (especially Donghyuck’s, who never misses the little smile dancing on your lips when Mark says something stupid, or the way Mark’s eyes shine when you trips over your words.) neither of you noticed that there should have been something more in your story. The coffee spill should’ve lead to a date, which should’ve lead to a kiss, which should’ve lead to more. Alas, your story was never meant to be generic, and at the point you were at, there was no changing it.

Mark lead you into a secluded alleyway, pressing his back against the wall with a sigh. You stood in front of him, the past events replaying in your mind all to form a singular question. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I wanted to- I swear to God- there were so many times when I was alone with you and I just wanted to tell you but I- I couldn’t do it.” At that moment, everything about him screamed uncertainty. From the tapping of his foot and his fidgeting fingers, to his shaky voice. You’ve known Mark longer than you’ve really known yourself, yet you’ve never seen him like this- so insecure, so.. apprehensive. You could tell he had stressed about this exact moment millions of times before, that the outcome could break him. “I don’t want you to see me differently.”

“Mark, this doesn’t change how I see you- ” You paused, taking a moment to collect your thoughts. The same way this exact moment clouded his mind daily, it made home in your mind as well. Thoughts about the day you tell Mark how you feel were constant. They took place in a considerable amount of your daydreams, they intruded your less stressful thoughts while you conversed with Mark, and they occasionally popped up when you should have been focusing in class, only making it harder for you to pretend that you were fine with being “just friends”. In fact, the thought of you and Mark being nothing but friends, the thought of watching him fall in love with someone else, that thought clung onto your lungs like an iron fist and you were just about to run out of oxygen. “You’re my best friend. I don’t care if you’re half spider, or whatever. I just want to be there for you, can’t you see that? I do everything I can just to show you how much I care about you- how much I fucking love you- and it just feels like a waste, because you weren’t even honest with me. You hid half of your life from me, Mark, and it hurts.”

“You love me?” He barely whispered, his body went still, looking at you through his mask expectantly. The fist around your lungs tightened and you could feel your heart drop right beneath your feet. The silence that followed his question felt like an eternity, you could hear every flicker of the street lamps and every laugh from every stranger passing by the alleyway, yet it felt like it was just the two of you. To you, the world had stopped entirely and it lay in his hand. After he decided the silence dragged on long enough, he pushed himself off the wall and took a few gradual steps towards you. “Do you want to take it off?”

“What?” His question was, needless to say, unexpected and confusing, though somewhat unsurprising; Mark had a tendency of switching between one thing to another at pace that’s hard for the average person to keep up with. You repeated the question in your mind and your mouth went dry as you stared at the outline of his eyes, hands shaking. Mark reached out and put your hand in his, lifting it up to his cheek.

“Take the mask off, I mean.” He chuckled, yet you could practically sense his nerves from miles away, betraying his confident demeanor. With his assistance, you traced your fingertips down to the edge of his mask, right at his jaw, and carefully tugged it off of his head. That night, was when you saw him for the first time, really saw him for all that he is. And at that moment, he was doing anything at all, but you could’ve sworn that his eyes held all the stars you’ve ever seen. His disheveled hair, up in angles that would’ve made you laugh if it weren’t for the current situation framed his face perfectly, and it was like your hand had a mind of its own when you reached out to run your hand through it. The light sheen of sweat covering his face only made him look so much more angelic under the moonlight. And his lips, curled up into the little smile you’ve grown to love so much. You barely noticed his face inching closer to your own, too caught up in his eyes, his lips, him. Before you could remind yourself to breathe, after noticing your breath had been caught in your throat for the past minute, his eyes were closed and his lips were on yours and you knew you would never again worry about what should have been. Every ‘what if’ and ‘I wish’ amounted to him with his arm around your waist and his hand placed your cheek, and you knew you have found your forever in the taste of his lips. He pulled away too soon.

“I love you too, y/n. I love you so, so much and I’m so sorry. I know I should face told you, I just- the thought of losing you was eating at me and I was so insecure and afraid and I am so sorry, please don’t be mad at me, I-” You cut his rambling off with a kiss, his wide eyes and furrows brows melting your heart, you could feel him smile into the kiss. You both broke into a fit of laughter mid way, starry eyes on each other with puffy lips, and he couldn’t help but cup your cheeks and smother you with kisses till you could barely breathe. You found heaven.

The too familiar tune of Love Yourself by Justin Bieber blared from his pocket once again. Your laughter died down, “Let’s go get Hyuck before he beats us up.” He said, taking hold of your hand and starting to lead you out of the alleyway.

“Mark, your mask.” You reminded him, only to earn a shrug and a “fuck it” in return.

“It’s okay, I’m going to tell Hyuck about it, too.”

“No, I mean there’s news reporters outside our apartment building, you really don’t want them to know you’re Spiderman.” You flicked his forehead lightly and handed him the mask. And with that, he quickly placed it back onto his head, and walked with you, hand in hand, into the city, and into your long awaited- not so generic- love story.

“As if I didn’t already know, it was obvious as fuck. I thought y/n would catch on sooner.”

“Come on, Hyuck, you had no clue, don’t lie!”

“Dude, I got you Spiderman socks on your birthday on purpose, I am Lee Donghyuck, I know everything.”

“Sure you do, what else do you know?”

“That the two of you are dating and haven’t told me yet.”

“What the fuck.”

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riverdalexreader-blog · 5 years

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Hidden / Jughead Jones x Reader

HIDDEN / JUGHEAD JONES X READER Word Count: 1675 Warnings: Profanity, mention of drug abuse. PROMPT: The reader (fem) is Cheryl’s younger sister. She is also Jughead’s secret girlfriend. They keep it private in fear of Cheryl and her parents’ reactions, but one day Cheryl catches them. (Request)

You ran through Eversgreen Forest, your boyfriend Jughead in hot pursuit behind you. You screamed as you looked behind your back and realised how close he really was, causing you both to laugh and pick up pace.

Sooner than you would have liked, you reached the bank of Sweetwater River and instantly screeched to a halt so as not to plunge yourself straight into the water. Jughead crashed right into you, almost knocking you in himself, but he caught you at the last moment and spun you around to be staring into his brilliant blue eyes.

“Looks like I’ve caught you.” he grinned, pulling you further from the river’s edge and onto the stable land.

“Looks like you have. But it’s okay. You’re not as bad as I thought.” you teased him.

“Whatever Blossom,” he laughed and sat down next to one of the trees, beckoning you to sit next to him.

“Blossom? Okay, Jones.” you kicked some of the dirt away from the area of forest undergrowth next to Jughead and lowered yourself down.

“You can’t get your pretty little Vixen outfit dirty can you?” he chaffed.

“Shut up.”

“You know I love you really.” he put his arms around you and pulled you close to him. You leaned on his shoulder and watched the river water flow by, the peaceful tranquillity of the situation bringing you immense comfort.

Both of you spoke to each other, joked and had just a genuinely good time in each other’s presence. You couldn’t believe how lucky you were. It was in Riverdale High’s library when you met Jughead. Being in the year below him, you shared no classes but the pair of you did share this one free period on a Tuesday morning.

You would spend each of these periods in the library studying and catching up on homework. Occasionally Jughead would be in there too, sitting at the same table in the corner, typing something up on his laptop with a to-go drink from Pop’s by his side.

One day, however, he broke this pattern. As you highlighted keywords for an upcoming history test, you heard the chair on the opposite side of the table scrape against the floor. You looked up and saw Jughead sitting across from you.

“Mind if I join you?” he asked. You flashed a brief look at his usual corner table, assuming it had been taken by one of the other students. It hadn’t.

Nonetheless, you accepted and he stayed in his seat, pulling out an actual textbook and not his laptop you were so used to seeing him on. The mutual studying stopped soon after it started and conversation broke out between you two.

The period ended and he left for his next class, leaving you in the library smiling to yourself. Despite the fact you had just met him, there was something about Jughead Jones that you loved. So you decided to ask your older sister in his year about him.

Bad idea.

“Jughead Jones?” she scowled at the mention of his name, “That hobo? He’s really weird and he comes from the Southside, ew. Why?”

“No reason, I just heard his name today, that’s all...”

Your family’s views of the Southside and its residents didn’t change your opinion on Jughead. When next Tuesday rolled around, you eagerly dashed to the library in hopes that Jughead would be joining you again. That’s where you found him already sitting at the table with not only his Pop’s drink but one sitting across from him in your seat too.

“You got me this?” you asked when you reached the table.

“Yeah. I didn’t know what to get you so I just got a cherry soda because you’re a Blossom,” he explained.

“More of Cheryl’s thing, but I still like it.” you giggled and sipped at the drink.

Once again the study period deteriorated into a chatting period. Things continued like this until you and Jughead decided to start meeting up outside of school.

It was a summer’s evening and you were sitting around the back of Pop’s with him when he asked you out. You accepted happily. Because of your family’s views, you decided to keep it quiet for your own safety, you could never be too sure what they would do even to their own daughter.

Which brought you to where you were now. Sitting in his arms in the forest, laughing at one of his sarcastic little jokes and then leaning in. Eyes closed. Slightly chapped lips meeting yours. Sensations of joy spreading throughout your body and knowing you could do this forever and ever but-

“Y/N?” the voice was oh so familiar and you didn’t even have to open your eyes and turn around to see who it was.

“Cheryl- I-” you began but was cut off immediately afterwards.

“Jughead Jones? Seriously? Even after what you’ve been taught about the type of criminals on the Southside? After what his father did to JJ?”

“No, Cheryl-”

“And here? The bank of Sweetwater River. Where that gang crawling with crackheads and criminals, that he’s,” she pointed a finger at Jughead, “Probably a part of snatched him snatched him up and killed him? I can’t believe you.”

With that, Cheryl turned swiftly on her heel and stormed out, disappearing behind the trees.

You wanted to run after her but something held you back. Tears welled in your eyes at the mention of Jason, Cheryl’s fury and her disapproval of your relationship.

Jughead took action immediately, “It’s okay,” he cooed, “She’ll come around.”

She’ll come around. That’s what Jughead had told you. But, no matter how much you wanted to trust his judgement, you didn’t think she was going to.

It had been weeks since the run in at Eversgreen and Cheryl still seemed furious. You sat next to your mother at the dining table, Cheryl across from you. She gave you dirty looks as you ate and at that moment something snapped.

Anger rushed through your body. Why was she giving you such a hard time? She should be happy for you. Basically your entire life she had insisted on finding you a boyfriend, but now you finally had one she was disapproving and cruel. You understood she was upset about Jason, you were too. But that was FP, not Jughead.

You didn’t want to cause a scene in front of your mother and Nana Rose so you bit back your words and rose from the table, claiming you weren’t hungry anymore and going back to your room.

About ten minutes later you heard Cheryl go into her room across from yours and took this as your chance to give a piece of your mind. You strode into the room, slamming the door shut behind you and before she could even open her mouth exploded into a rant.

“Cheryl, I want to know why you’re so pissed off at me for nothing!” she opened her mouth but you cut her off, “Don’t even begin to speak. Yours and mom’s and every other Blossom’s derogatory views of the Southside need to stop. It’s literally a side of town. Yeah, there are more criminals, but that’s because us Northsiders treat them like shit so much that they just resort to gang violence and crime instead of trying out life. Instead of helping, people like our family and that Alice Cooper and even the fucking mayor of Riverdale just keep taking shots at them even though they’re already down.”

You paused for a second but Cheryl stayed silent. You continued.

“And Jason. I loved him just as much as you did. So why am I dating Jughead? Because his father helped do what happened to Jason, not him. He had no part in it. I want you to be happy for me Cheryl, I want to be like how we used to be. But if you’re gonna keep degrading Jug then forget it because he makes me the happiest girl in Riverdale and doesn’t deserve you constantly degrading him.”

Similarly to how Cheryl did a few weeks ago, you turned around and headed back to your room, leaving Cheryl in a stunned silence.

It was a few days after your eruption at Cheryl when she came to your room.

She walked in, sat at the end of your bed and begun speaking.

“I’ve been thinking about what you said, Y/N. And- well- you’re right. Even though I never particularly liked Jughead I should at least be happy for you. Which is why I am going to give him a chance.”

You were shocked.

“I’m sorry for the way I acted and the way I've been treating you these past few weeks, Y/N. Please, forgive me.”

“I forgive you.”

And that was that. The feud was over. Finally, you felt at peace. The next few hours were spent in your room discussing all the events that had taken place in each other’s lives in the weeks that you were arguing.

When you went to sleep that night, you smiled to yourself. You finally had your sister back.

From that day on, everything improved. You could now be more public about your relationship with Jughead and even invite him over to your house without worrying about being walked in on.

Cheryl and Jughead had reached this awkward stage between strangers and friends. Although they were wary of each other still, you were happy with their friendship because it was better than you would have ever expected to happen.

Cheryl was the one to open the door when it was sharply rapped three times.

“Oh, hi Cheryl, is Y/N in?” it was Jughead, wearing his signature beanie and S shirt.

“Yeah, just wait here a sec,” she said and walked back into the house, calling up the stairs for you.

You ran down and thanked her, said goodbye and left the house, hand in hand with Jughead, excited for the date that was about to commence and happy that you didn’t need to be hidden any longer.

118 notes · View notes

1kook · 6 years

Text

crisis averted

❀: Chanyeol x (F) Reader

summary → The doorbell rings not even ten minutes later, and you buzz him up without even checking the little screen to see if it’s actually Chanyeol. But who else would show up at your door past midnight? → friends to lovers, sexual content (smut) → 5.2k

this isn't proofread lmao mobile users: there is a read more inserted but it doesn't work unless the post is reblogged so I'm sorry if you have to scroll through all this! :(

for reference x!

Chanyeol was in the middle of what was probably his third mid-life crisis when you’d first met him, his hair a pastel array of colors that seemed to reflect the tumultuous state of his emotions. You’d been alarmed at his appearance, never before seeing someone as mismatched as he’d been, his very obviously buff figure hidden beneath a multitude of loose clothing, his boyish facial features thrown for a loop whenever he spoke in that deep tone of his. He was constantly changing, balancing between the happiest person in the universe, and the biggest crybaby ever. But his emotional state wasn’t due to some traumatic event that had occurred to him, like the death of a loved one, or a break-up more severe than any drama writer could ever imagine, but it was simply because he wasn’t sure whether or not he turned the stove off that morning.

In short, Chanyeol was an enigma, a perplexing being whose preferred choice of action always contained the most complex solution, even when the simplest answer was available.

Perhaps thats why it’d been so easy to befriend him during college, with the way he fluttered from group to group, seemingly finding something to relate to within everyone he ever met. Chanyeol had become the planner of your group outings, mostly the instigator of all those weird three a.m. adventures, and though your friend circle seemed large, he’d always found a time to sneak in a little conversation between the two of you. Of course, he’d done that for everyone and his never-ending kindness was what had made him such a lovable character among you all, one of those guys that you remembered way after college as the life of the party, and, in most cases, the one that ended up a deadbeat crackhead.

Yet Chanyeol was different in the sense that he had high hopes for his future, dreams that eclipsed any possibility of him becoming a failure. He was dead set on his career as an architect, putting aside his pride to even attend tutoring for that mathematics class he was falling behind in. His determination to succeed in life was so strong, that it was no surprise he did end up in the career he wanted, and had even advanced through different promotions all within your first year out of college.

The way he’d slithered his way into your life after graduation was also confusing.

Though you’d still kept in touch with the majority of your college friends, he seemed to be the one that stuck out the most, his presence nearly inevitable in your daily life. It wasn’t anything too major, not like his clothes were in your house, but just tiny things, like how he’d somehow managed to sneak his copy of Tokyo Drift into your movie collection, or the annoying habit of his to line up all your shoes every time he visited. It was those little gestures that seemed to stand out the most in your apartment, and eventually, you weren’t the only one that noticed.

“Did Chanyeol come over?” Jongdae called from the kitchen, where he was supposed to be grabbing the two of you a bottle of water. You hummed in response, your attention primarily focused on the paperwork before you. Your current occupation was as an elementary school teacher, and though you loved working with kids, their handwriting was absolutely atrocious, and the only other person willing to strain their eyes for two hours straight happened to be your best friend.

“Yeah, he dropped by yesterday,” you responded, handing a sheet over to Jongdae as he dutifully returned to his spot on the floor by the coffee table. In exchange, he handed you the water bottle, and you barely cracked the lid open when he dove into his interrogation.

“He loves bothering you, doesn’t he?” He teased, and you could only offer a half-hearted shrug, gulping down the water instead. Jongdae nudged your side, and you slowly lowered the bottle, raising your brows at him as if he was saying something useless. He was, but he’d smack you over the head with a throw pillow if you said as much.

“Don’t you think he comes over a little too much for someone who’s just a friend?” He sighed, and you blinked.

The thought had occurred to you multiple times. Chanyeol’s visits were often, probably at least once a week, more frequent than Jongdae’s, and he was supposed to be your best friend. You didn’t mind them though, as his presence seemed to calm you in a way no one else’s did. But you could see why Jongdae had his suspicions, and from an outsiders perspective, it did seem like Chanyeol was a nuisance to you, and the fact most of the stories you shared about him included Chanyeol being a bit overbearing didn’t seem to help.

But you knew Chanyeol in a way Jongdae didn't, despite you all being college pals, and you knew he wouldn’t understand that Chanyeol wasn’t bothering you for the mere fact he wanted someone to annoy, but because he cared about you, and valued your friendship enough to check up on you. There was also the fat he brightened your day when he’d pop in, even if his stay was only for a few minutes with the sole intention of grabbing a water in the middle of his jog. He was naturally friendly and nurturing, and the sight of him sprawled across your sofa as you reheated leftovers, waiting to hear about your week, was so ingrained in your mind already.

You weren’t exactly sure when Chanyeol had morphed from ‘that one guy’ in your group to someone you found yourself relying on, even when nothing was wrong. Since your first introduction, he’d had two other midlife crises, the first one making him impulsively dye his hair a flaming red color, but he was your friend so you were mandated to be there for him whenever another minor inconveniences occurred in his admittedly fast-paced life.

Chanyeol’s hair had been that fiery color when your dirtbag boyfriend had dumped you two weeks before graduation. You remember the way you’d bumped into him as you climbed off the bus in front of your campus, and how he’d dropped his grocery bag in an attempt to comfort you. You’d barely known each other then, and the sickening crack his carton of eggs had made as he pulled you into a soft side hug had sent you into a spiraling panic.

But Chanyeol hadn’t minded, he even walked you across the campus until you reached your dorm building. It was the first instance you’d found yourself leaning for him, any sort of reservations you’d had before flying out the window as he saw you to your dorm, and even went as far as waiting for you to wash your face and crawl into bed, before shutting the lights off and promptly leaving.

“He’s my close friend,” you drawl when you realize you’d left Jongdae hanging for too long. He eyes you as if he wants to ask more, but you beat him to it. “You’re the one who said I should be nicer to him,” you point out, and revel in the defeated sigh he gives in response.

Jongdae stays a while longer, but once the sun begins setting, he leaves. He’s been working weird shifts at work lately, so you don’t beg him to help you any longer, and even wrap up some of the homemade gelatin you’d made yesterday for him to take on his way out.

You’re left alone in your thoughts for the rest of the night, until Chanyeol texts you around midnight, and you contemplate ignoring it as you open your retainer case, face freshly washed and hair pulled away from your face. You’re beyond tired, and tomorrow’s Saturday, so you can sleep in for as long as you want; you want nothing more than to collapse right now.

But your curiosity gets the best of you and you find yourself setting aside your retainers in favor of reaching for your phone, swiping a finger across the screen until your messages open up and your faced with a challenge.

chanyeol [12:13 pm] we have a problem.

You can feel your last peaceful exhale leave you like the ocean’s pulling tide in the early morning hours, Chanyeol’s text burning itself into the back of your eyelids as you let them flutter shut. You can’t stop the palm you raise to your face, your pointer finger massaging your temples as you begin considering how to go about this. You could easily ignore the message and tell him in the morning that you’d already been asleep then. He was familiar with your sleeping habits enough to believe such a lie. But there’s also the possibility that Chanyeol really is in trouble this time, and not going through another minor inconvenience that even a toddler could easily get around.

___ [12:15 pm] what is your problem?

He responds right away.

chanyeol [12:15 pm] our* problem

chanyeol [12:16 pm] i’m coming over.

You nearly slam your head against your vanity. Leave it to Chanyeol to deprive you of your sleep. After the week you’ve had, you have to talk yourself out of strangling him the second he shows up. It’d only taken him five minutes to ruin your night so it’s only fair.

Pushing your irritation aside, you go about your apartment, picking up the stray socks here and there, and even doing a light sweep of the place. You weren’t kidding about your week, so it was natural your place had taken a little extra hit from your growing stress in the form of scattered cookie crumbs and misplaced shoes.

The doorbell rings not even ten minutes later, and you buzz him up without even checking the little screen to see if it’s actually Chanyeol. But who else would show up at your door past midnight? As you walk past the front door, broom in hand, you unlock the door before continuing down the hall to return the broom to its rightful place in the spare closet.

Chanyeol bursts in without knocking, a habit of his that had terrified the living daylights out of you when he'd first began visiting you. You don’t think much of it now, and don’t even flinch at his clambering as he tugs off his shoes, trailing your way back to the front door to greet him.

“Hey,” you say and all is calm for exactly a quarter of a second, before Chanyeol’s entire face goes up in flames. You’re immediately startled, and don't waste time ushering him inside as he struggles out a greeting that is only half comprehensible, his flustered state worrying you the longer he stutters about. “Jesus, Yeol, what happened to you?”

Chanyeol’s looking every bit the abducted civilian as he sits awkwardly perched on your couch, his brown eyes hidden behind the thin glass layer of his spectacles. Suddenly, you notice the soft hues of his hair, peeking out beneath the brim of his hat. Without much warning, you snatch the accessory off his head, greeted by the sight of his wavy hair colored a pastel shade, similar to the it’d been when you first met.

“I-I can explain!” he exclaims, snatching the hat back out of your grasp to stuff over his hair. He’s visibly a mess, and you can already tell he’s going through another one of his crises just by the way his gaze flickers between you and the potted plant behind you.

“Oh, dude,” you breathe, trying to chance another peek at his hair, which he dutifully avoids by clamping a palm over the top of his hat, holding it down firmly. “You’re going through some shit, aren’t you?” You plop down beside him, criss-crossing your legs as you turn to face his tense figure.

“You have no idea,” he whines, before slumping into the couch, long arms spreading over the entirety of the back. His hair makes him appear way tanner than he normally is, the soft pinks and purples curling around his ears where the hat doesn’t exactly cover.

You know you should feel sympathetic, but you can’t help the snort that escapes your lips as you stare at Chanyeol. He’d been so put together last week as he’d rambled on and on about some new project at work, and how awesome Sehun’s birthday party had been. He’d just finished moving into a new apartment too, one that allowed him to finally reclaim his dog from his family home and live with him. From an outsider’s perspective, Chanyeol couldn’t possibly have anything to complain about, especially with the life he lead now.

Carefully, you tug the black hat off his head, and when he doesn’t protest, you begin running your fingers through his newly dyed hair. You’re surprised he hasn’t begun balding, especially with the rate he changes up his hair; it’s unusually silky for someone who pours way too many chemicals into it.

“Wanna talk about it?” You hum, and his eyes flutter shut beneath your touch. He sighs, and you can already tell he’s going to dive into the venting of a lifetime right now. Hopefully, you can derail his stress enough that he doesn’t impulsively dye his hair another color tomorrow. By the way he’s slowly dissolving into a puddle beneath your fingers, it’s possible.

“They wanna build a villa,” Chanyeol murmurs, head tilting just the slightest in your direction. “A fucking villa,” he repeats, and an unamused huff leaves his throat. “Can you believe that, ___? He contracts me for a bachelor pad, and after we’ve finally hammered out all the stupid little details he spent months crying about, his fiancée says she wants a fucking villa.” He groans, and you run your nails against his scalp, until his agitated grunt melts into a soft whine.

You nod along, even though his eyes are shut, but you know he can feel your sympathy as you toy with his hair. “But it gets worse!” He shifts, so his head is pressed into the couch cushions and turned your way, his body slowly becoming one with the cotton beneath him. “Apparently, Toben can’t be in the complex backyard until I get him spayed, which, I could’ve sworn he was, but apparently he wasn’t!”

“You should take him to Minseok’s clinic,” you suggest, voice quiet compared to his loud tone as he continues on complaining over you. You don’t mind, and just listen for a few more minutes as he tells you everything wrong with his life, including how he’d gone to dye his hair a dark red, only to hastily decide on the pastel mess it was now, without considering the fact his work dress code only called for moderately natural hair colors. Now he’d have to go again before Monday to dye it black or brown (’or something! I don’t know!’) again.

You’ve long since abandoned combing through his locks, and instead chose to pick at a stray thread on one of your throw pillows, listening intently to everything he said. He rarely had moments like these, where every single thing seemed to get on nerves, but you yourself had plenty. And he was always there for you, so it was only just that you did the same for him.

By the time Chanyeol’s irritation is reaching its end, he’s basically cursing everything, even things that don’t have any correlation to his current distress. “And also, I haven’t vacuumed the living room carpet in weeks, the bathroom soap is about to run out, and I haven’t gotten laid in three fucking months now,” he whines, eyes screwing shut as his lips push out into a pout.

He seems settled after that, his ragged breath slowly turning into a soft sigh, until he’s completely cooled down from his blow up. “You should vacuum while Toben’s at the vet,” you say afterwards, brushing a stray hair behind your ear as you lean into the couch, one hand propped on your elbow.

Unconsciously, your fingers stretch out to toy with his hair again, but this time, his eyes flutter open. “And there’s definitely an unopened hand wash under the sink,” you add as you recall the tangerine scented bottle you’d seen last week when you’d all gone over for game night at Chanyeol’s place.

He sighs, leaning into your touch. He looks ridiculously soft in this state, and with his hair array of pinks and purples, the occasional baby blue peeking out, he looked almost heavenly. “You can’t have such an easy solution for everything,” he huffs, an though his comment is sarcastic, his tone is lighthearted. You give a noncommittal hum at his words, and his brown eyes slowly find yours. The glint in his eyes is different then, nothing like the jittery mess that had walked through your door. “What about getting laid?” He teases, the corner of his lip curling upwards.

You roll your eyes. “Just go to a club, or something,” you reply offhandedly, before turning away from him to stretch your cramping legs out. Chanyeol shifts, and when you sit back again, he’s sat up now.

“What if I don’t wanna go to a club?” He pushes, running his fingers through his hair until it’s pushed away from his forehead.

You shrug. “Then go to a brothel.”

Chanyeol huffs out a cackle, which you ignore in favor of watching the way his lips pull tight around his smile, and his Adams apple bops as he throws his head back. When he’s done, he turns his gaze back to you, and for the first time, Jongdae’s words ring in your mind again.

You shoo them away quickly though. “You have too many problems, Yeol,” you point out, and he chuckles again, though this time it’s more muted and less as amused.

“Yeah,” he muses, eyes trailing over your face in a way he’s never really done before. He’s eyeing you again, which you try to ignore, but when your gazes meet, suddenly you feel taken away at the intensity of his stare. It’s as if you’re suddenly realizing your situation. Alone with a man on a Friday night, both of you gazing at each other too deeply for people who are just friends. The sudden realization startles you into looking away first, eyes landing on the papers scattered across your coffee table.

A hand presses to your thigh, bare due to the length of your shorts. “My biggest problem,” Chanyeol murmurs, and your eyes instinctively snap back to him. He grins, his chest rising as he takes in another heavy breath. “Is you.”

“Huh?” You question, and for the first time, you feel nervous in front of Chanyeol. You feel unsure of the way he’s gazing at you, at the way his fingers press into your thigh, and the way he looks like he belongs there, nestled inside your apartment as if he’s always been there. Perhaps he does, you think, as your eyes slowly trace down his face until you catch yourself staring at his mouth, his lips turned upwards in an arrogant smirk you rarely see on Chanyeol.

He leans forward then, and your body betrays you, letting him press against you until he has you between his warm body and the armrest of the furniture. “You’re my biggest problem, ___,” he sighs, his mouth suddenly pressed against your neck, and you can’t help the tiny gasp that fights its way out of your throat.

“I-I don’t understand,” you breathe, though your hands curl their way around Chanyeol’s shoulders, and can feel the twitch of his muscles as his hand trails up your side. “Chanyeol,” you gasp, when he suddenly presses a kiss beneath your ear, and your faithless body arches up into him.

“God, ___” he says against the skin of your neck, and you jump when you feel his hand pull against the back of your thigh, slowly encouraging your legs aside until he’s cradled between your legs. “I come over here all the time, take you out to eat whenever you want, and I even buy you makeup shit that I don’t even know anything about,” he huffs, and nips at the vein in your neck. Your breath stutters and you find yourself melting under his touch, similar to the way he had been earlier when you’d brushed your fingers through his hair.

“I’ve been trying to win you over for the longest time, love,” he murmurs, his mouth on your neck getting bolder with every word he says. He pulls away only for a moment, brown eyes meeting yours as he quietly says, “you stress me the fuck out.”

You can’t help the snort that leaves your throat, and the blindingly bright smile Chanyeol sends your way is enough to make your heart tap dance in your chest. “Yeol, you’re the worst!” You huff, rolling your head back until it’s over the curve of the armrest. He seems weirdly complacent as he watches you war with yourself, all your past theories suddenly bubbling to the surface.

Jongdae was one hundred percent correct in his weird assumptions of Chanyeol, and though a deep part of you always knew he was way too touchy for someone who was just a friend, you hadn’t believed someone as marvelous as Chanyeol could be interested in you.

He doesn’t let you drown in your past self doubts for long before he’s resuming kissing along your neck, his lips slowly inching their way up. “Do you know how annoying it is having to watch you whine about how no one likes you every weekend,” he murmurs against your jaw, where he’s making quick work of reaching your lips.

“Shut up,” you whine, arms twining around his back to finally pull him closer. “Just kiss me before I kick you out.”

Chanyeol complies, pressing his pink lips to yours in what is your first kiss with him. He’s a disgustingly good kisser, and for a moment you kick yourself for letting him wander off with random women at parties, women who’d gotten to see another side of him, when you could’ve been seeing him in this light, hearing the sounds he makes as he pushes against your core. “You’re so pretty, baby,” he chuckles when he pulls away, cheeks adorably flushed and lips sinfully red and plump. God, do you really hate your own obliviousness.

Though he pecks your lips once more, he soon begins working his way in the direction he’d come from, lips pressing to your neck at all the right spots, leaving you a panting mess beneath him. The shirt you’re wearing only works in Chanyeol’s favor, and he crumples the over-sized material in one fist, pulling it away to expose one side of your neck.

“Ch-Chanyeol,” you pant when he shifts against you, and something brushes against your core. Your hands dig into the back of his own shirt, fisting the material under your tight grasp.

He hums, his hands finally releasing you to push up your shirt instead, long fingers tickling up your skin the further he goes. You’d tugged on a lacy bralette when he’d first announced his visit, too lazy to tug on a real bra but not bold enough to let the girls swing in his presence. Apparently, none of that mattered now as Chanyeol’s fingers traced along the soft lace of the only article keeping his hands from your hardening nipples.

He pushes your shirt back, and leans away just the slightest to stare at the cute lace that hugged your skin. “Wow,” he breathes, flashing you another one of those dopey smiles. There’s a bow sewed into the center of the garment, a dainty little thing that sits in the valley between your breasts, and you know what he’s going to say before he says it. “You’re like a present.”

You pinch his bicep, though he probably doesn’t feel it through all that muscle because all Chanyeol does is laugh, obnoxiously loud for someone currently making out. But it’s endearing in a way you never thought sex would be, his hands stroking up your side as he gazes at you intimately. “Hurry up,” you tell him, deciding the best way to get him back on track is with more skin. So you tug the shirt over your head, and make quick work of disposing his own.

“Relax, baby,” he says once you’ve managed to wrangle him out of his long sleeve shirt. There’s a new tattoo on his clavicle, a date that you hadn’t seen before, and when you point it out questioningly, Chanyeol’s only response is, “I love my mom.”

“Of course you do,” you murmur, before pulling him by the neck to kiss you again. He does so without complaint, and repositions himself above you until he’s somewhat on his knees, somewhat lying down, his skin on yours scorching.

Chanyeol’s hand is already under the soft material of your bra, fingers toying with your hardened nipple, when he decides he needs to kiss you again, surging forward to sloppily press his mouth against yours. His tongue is all too skilled as he licks into the hot inside of your mouth, and you know he has that stupidly dopey grin on from the way you occasionally feel his teeth press against your lips. “Stop it,” you quietly whine, fingers knotted in the pastel tresses of his hair.

“I can’t help it, baby,” he replies, and you have a hard time swallowing the moan that builds in the back of your throat when he finally frees both your nipples from their clothed cage, only to capture them between his fingers. “You look so cute right now.”

Before you can point out his cheesiness, he’s manhandling you around the couch, until you’re seated in his lap. The dark shorts he’d shown up in have shifted from all the movement, until they’re clinging dangerously low on the dip of his waist, all taut muscles on display before you. He taps your arms, urging you to raise your arms, before he’s pulling the bralette over your head, and you’re left in the same state of dress as him, a feat he doesn’t let last long.

Chanyeol helps you shimmy out of the cotton shorts you’d been wearing, and when you’re finally seated on his lap in only a lacy little underwear you’d bought at a Victoria’s Secret sale, he takes you in. His hands are as wild as he is, tracing over your shoulders and down your spine, a ticklish feeling that makes you unconsciously arch into him, pressing your breasts a little too close to his face. Chanyeol doesn’t mind, and had you not sat back down onto his lap, he’d have leaned forward to lick at your nipples.

When he’s satisfied with the mapping out he’s done of your body, he lets his fingers trail between your legs, running one lone finger over the little dip where your folds meet. Your body twitches, and you bite down the moan building in your throat. “C’mon, ___,” he murmurs, lips pressed to your neck as his fingers continue their ministrations. “Tell me what you want.” He presses one finger against your clit, and you gasp, throwing your head back in pleasure.

“Y-You,” you stammer, already feeling the last traces of control leaving your body as you submit to him, body completely malleable under his touch. “I want you, Yeol,” you whimper, and you reach your hands out towards him in a last ditch effort to stabilize yourself. One hand digs into the taut muscles of his shoulder, while the other tangles itself in that bright head of his, your fingers buried between strands of pink and purple.

“Really?” Chanyeol grins, and before you can respond, he’s pushed aside your underwear and has one finger gently prodding at your slick pussy. His finger now halfway submerged inside of you, he presses a kiss against your neck, where a thin sheen of sweat has accumulated. His finger twists inside of you, and you're vaguely aware that he’s knuckles deep, as he adds in that low voice of his, “you like my fingers, baby?”

You nod, your lip bruising between your teeth. He’s only got one finger inside of you, yet you’re already a withering mess in front of him, thighs quivering with every curl of his digit, your whole body jolting when he brushes his thumb against your clit.

Chanyeol continues on fingering you, basking in the sounds you make, and the way you cry his name when he brushes against the sweet spot inside of you. You’re sweaty and gross, but the way he glances up at you like you’re an ancient goddess makes your heart thud faster until you can hear the blood rushing in your ears.

He slips another finger in to properly scissor you, and you nearly weep from the sensations coursing through your body. “Faster,” you beg, voice hoarse from all the incoherent babbling you’ve been doing, but Chanyeol complies, twisting his wrist hard and fast, until you’re pushing down into his fingers, desperate for more.

“Look at you,” he says, lips sucking at your collarbone. At this point, you’re contributing equally as much as Chanyeol to your impending orgasm, rutting against his hand like an animal in heat. He doesn’t seem to mind as he kisses along your damp skin, sucking marks against places you know will be hard to cover up, but in the moment you don’t seem to mind. “You’re making such a mess,” Chanyeol sighs, and when you glance down, his hand is glistening with your own pleasure.

Your orgasm is slowly creeping up on you, and your body feels ridiculously weak, your mind in an even more frazzled state from all that’s happened so far. You fall forward, burying your face against Chanyeol’s neck as his hands get faster and your hips get slower.

“Yeol,” you pant, and his hips unconsciously thrust up into your core, drawing a long moan from you. The sound only seems to work him further, and you’re suddenly aware he’s been holding himself back in favor of pleasuring you first. “It’s so good,” you tell him, lips flush against his skin, you tongue languidly licking at the spot just beneath his ear.

His makes a sound to let you know he’s listening, fingers curling inside of you as you continue whimpering against his chest. “Please, Yeol,” you whine, suddenly grinding your hips forward until his hand is trapped between the two of you and his covered cock is rubbing against your folds. “You make me feel s-so good.”

It doesn’t take much longer for you to finally release, the combined sensations of his thumb rubbing against your clit and his rock-hard outline against your lower lips enough to turn you into a whimpering mess before him, his name rolling off your tongue like honey, until your hips stutter against his, and you briefly fall into a placid state between his arms.

When you come to again, the feeling of his raging cock beneath you is enough to make your legs tremble again, but Chanyeol doesn’t let it go any further just yet.

“You were so good for me, baby,” he murmurs as he presses soft kisses along your shoulder, before grabbing your chin between his fingers to press his lips to yours. His mouth is still as hot as it was before, and you melt into his touch, running both hands through his light hair and tugging until he’s moaning against your lips, his hips slowly stirring beneath you.

You pull away with a loud pop, quickly pressing your lips against the corner of his jaw, and sucking a light bruise onto the hot skin. “Well,” he sighs, voice airy, “that solves one problem.”

You bite down hard, yet Chanyeol still laughs.

#park chanyeol smut #park chanyeol imagine #pcy smut #pcy imagine #chanyeol x reader #chanyeol smut #mine #whew boy i wrote this all in two hours #a bitch is struggling!!!#my eyesight!!! none existent #exo fic

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seoulscenarios · 6 years

Text

Romeo, Romeo wherefore art thou Romeo?

Genre: light angsty fluff, high school au, female reader insert

Member(s): Stray Kids’ Minho (ft. Jisung and the lads)

Word count: 2991

Warnings: light swearing, light pda at the end

Summary: you and Minho had been best friends since you could walk but it seems only you had developed a crush on him. Will a late class and a small two man production of Romeo and Juliet change his mind or does he really not like you? Featuring the rest of the crackheads with their leader, Han Jisung, love is in the air at school and a certain someone is just oblivious to it.

Authors note: based off the following request “All time fav cliché best friends to lovers with Minho (stray kids) angsty fluff where reader (preferably female) thinks her love is one sided, but turns out it’s not. Good ending”. I hope this is something to what you wanted and sorry it’s not heavy on the angst pls enjoy !!

-You and Minho had een best friends for years and you always had the tiniest crush on Minho but it escalated a lot over the summer as Minho glowed UP

-Wow u are whipped

-However whipped as you are for him he never seemed to reciprocate it

-Ever

-You even went out with on valentine’s day 3 (three?!) years in a row but his thick skull didn’t acknowledge it and just thought it was another friends doing friends things

-So, you moved on

-I mean he’s your best friend you can’t let your crush get in the way of things

-You were there for him whenever he argued with his parents or friends, he was stressed about school or failed a test and uwu

-You’re just the bestest of friends and everyone is jealous (tho most think you are dating)

-So,,,,,

-You guys always hang out in school together bc you’re in the same friendship group

-And youre in most of the same classes, so you normally walk together

-WELL

-Minho managed to make the BOTH of you late to ur first class bc his dumb ass slept through his alarm and u had to basically drag him out of bed lmao

-So u rock up late for class

-Ur teacher is NOT impressed

-So as a punishment they give u a script of a play and told to learn it by next week

-U groan when u see the title of the play

-Romeo and Juliet

- Oh no

-This won’t end well

-You glance at Minho to see if he has any reaction bc,,,,, hello ur dying on the inside and probably the outside and you can hear Jisung and felix trying to hold in their laughs at u

-(you make a mental note to beat their asses later)

-And Minho

-Is very unfazed as he flicks through the script

-Ur kinda disappointed

-I mean it’s not fair how you’re a literal MESS trying not to let the floor swallow u up in embarrassment tbh

-So,, the two of you practice outside of class at ur guys’ house and you can’t help but notice how utterly unfazed he was by this whole ordeal

-Ur both literally reciting the most well-known love story on this planet and yet,,,,, nothing

-Not an ounce of feeling that he likes you

-I mean,,, he’s not a bad actor and his romeo makes u SWOON but honestly you swoon for irl Minho not just romeo Minho

-As you stutter over some of the lovey-dovey lines u hear Minho laugh a little and tells u to redo it

-his little shit

-After a week of practice, you guys are ready to perform this goddamn piece

-I may add that ur teacher only gave you the condensed version and not the whole play

-It just so happens that the condensed version only focuses on romeo and juliet’s love

-Bc English teachers amirite?

-So the two of you turn up to class ON TIME this week, not wanting to get ur ass beat again

-And ur just the tiniest bit nervous bc !!!! hello !!!! ur performing with ur crush !!!!

-U glance over at ur seatmate Jisung who gives u a big thumbs up

-BREATHE Y/N

-Everything is going well, u don’t stutter and Minho is just the perfect romeo

-Until the final scene I may add

-As you lay “dying” as Juliet, Minho runs onto the scene and spots u laying down

-He walks up to u and goes to kneel

-BUT

-Before you both knew it, he stumbled

-And fell

-Right

-On

-Top

-Of

-You

-Lips centimetres apart from each other

-OWO what’s this

-U swear the whole class are holding their breaths and can hear ur damn heartbeat

-U stare at Minho in shock for what must have been a minute

-Neither one of you tearing ur eyes apart from the other

-It wasn’t until you hear ur teacher cough slightly that the two of you snap out of it and Minho pulls away

-He finishes the scene off with no problem and honestly,,,, u don’t even register it’s over until Minho offers his hand to help you stand up

-You grab it, flushing a hella lot bc,,,,, u nearly kissed ur crush in front of ur whole class RIP

-Ur teacher was impressed with u guys and let you off the next assignment ur class had (if only u were aware of this then u would hear the whole class esp Jisung groan)

-As u go back to ur seat,,, ur eyes drift back to Minho and ur thoughts go back to that last scene and his lips……

-“yah Y/N ! u and minho were so close I swear you were gonna kiss you shoulda seen ur face!!!!! I thought for real that Minho was just gonna plant one on you !”

-Smh Jisung

-Poor baby,,, u just sit in shock trying to concentrate

-Hint: it doesn’t work

-Ur plagued with thoughts of Minho for the rest of the day,,,,, I mean you already were but now it’s like sensory overload but with Minho

-But u know he doesn’t like you

-Lmao why would he

-He surely would’ve spoken to you about by now esp after that near kiss in class

-But this dumbass is still oblivious

-School ends and ur trying to forget about the near kiss

-But in this, you forget that Minho has a habit of walking you home

-So there he is

-Leaning on your locker waiting for you to turn up

-YOU SWOON BC NO ONE SHOULD LOOK THAT HOT IN SCHOOL UNIFORM FOR PETE’S SAKE

-His blazer was off, shirt sleeves rolled up, blonde hair tousled and wavy (ladies, imagine Minho like this I’m crying)

-U feel ur heart literally stutter

-I swear that’s a medical condition Y/N

-“Let’s stop by the convenience store, my treat” he smiles down at you as he moves out the way so u can get to ur locker

-Dude,,,,, u need to stop before I melt into the floor

-“Uhhhh I can’t I have,,,,,, a study session at the library gotta work on some literature stuff u know ahaha”

-Minho frowns but doesn’t react massively

-Secretly he thinks its hella cute that ur tryna avoid him but that’s for another time

-“Okay, don’t study too hard and I’ll treat you another time. Text me when you get home”

-UWU

-Anyone who overhears this would be like wow 10/10 relationship goals tbh

-U however, a self-proclaimed dumbass, don’t dwell on it too much

-You guys tend to grab food after school together

-ANYWAYS

-Minho pulls you in for a hug before leaving

-Oof ur heart is stuttering again

-How you made it to the library for ur study session is a wonder tbh

-25 minutes later finds you groaning into ur books cursing minho’s name

-That’s when u realise 2 things, 1) that wow ur a FOOL bc there is no literature homework bc of ur work from earlier and 2) Minho is very bad for your health and u gotta avoid him for ur own sake

-U walk into school with this resolve

-It doesn’t work

-Minho is in practically every single one of ur classes

-So u practically have to run from each class to avoid him

-Which leaves Minho very confused

-He doesn’t walk with anyone else from class or treat them like he does to you

-Which makes Jisung very jealous,,, bc why can’t Minho treat him like this

-Little did you know Minho has a PHAT crush on you and Jisung is PLAGUED by the both of u gushing about the other

-Jisung is MEDITATING

-So when you start avoiding him even more Minho is extremely put out bc what does he do now who does he spend time with now

-(jeongin: we’re still here hyung!!!)

-Being the good friend he is, he gives u space but is still v sad about it

-And honestly, ur sad too bc as much as you love spending time with Jisung,,,,,, he’s no Minho lmao

-One night after school Minho is kicking round the football field with the others and that’s when he realises

-He’d much rather spend his time with you

-It’s not that he doesn’t love his friends, he just happens to love you even more

-But how can he reach out to you when ur avoiding him still

-Jisung notices how glazed over Minho’s eyes and knows

-*cracks knuckles* it’s time

-Jisung sends Minho home telling him to grow some chest hair n text u lmao

-Minho does go home but does not text you bc he’s just a nervous boy

-Jisung to the lads: “now he’s gone, we gotta make a plan for the two lovebirds they’re so BLIND I’m sick of it I might just confess to Minho myself”

-Chan: “……….”

-Jisung: “that was a joke old man, let’s focus pls ladies”

-So the plan

-Was it an elaborate one?

-Definitely not

-Lmao have u seen these kids they’re a bunch of crackheads

-Baso,,,, they’re just following the classic let’s text them separately to meet up as a front but SIKE it’s just the two of you alone

-Fool proof right?

-Somehow it is???

-Shocking??

-The two of you don’t expect anything is going on

-So it’s the weekend when the plan is put into action

-It’s been 17 days since you last spoke to Minho not that you had been counting haahaha okay yesyouhaveitsnotlikeyoumisshimoranything

-You wake up to a text from Jisung saying that him, felix, hyunjin, and changbin were going for ice cream and whether you wanted to go

-Which duh??? Ice cream???

-U needed it so you dragged yourself out of bed to get ready

-Little did you know that Minho too had received a text from Woojin saying that him and the others (a.k.a the family,,,,, Woojin, chan, seungmin and jeongin) were going for ice cream

-And Minho wasn’t passing up the chance esp when there was a high probability that chan would pay lmao

-*in the master gc of getting Minho and Y/N together*

-Jisung: excellent

-So 1pm rolls by and ur there at the ice cream parlour waiting for the others to rock up

-U go to order bc honestly boys take so long to get ready istg

-As you give ur order a voice behind goes “and a matcha ice cream as well please”

-U FREEZE

-Why of all the ppl to turn up

-It’s the one ur trying to avoid

-U turn to face him

-“Minho?”

-“Y/N?”

-Felix, somewhere: beYONCE?

-Ur in shock bc 1) why is here? 2) who allowed him to look so good in white ripped jeans ur DYING HERE 3) where is everyone else?

-That’s when u realise

-Jisung is a snake and ur friendship is over

-Y/N is taking applications for a new friend who isn’t called Han Jisung thank you

-Ur heart is stuttering bc Minho looks so boyfriend ur not okay

-Safe to say those 17 days did NOTHING in swaying your crush on him

-“Is that all?” oh yikes yeah this isn’t a drama scene Y/N where ur crush confesses to u, someone has to pay at this point and the queue behind the two of u is getting impatient lmao

-You whip around blushing “uh yeah that’s everything” u reply stuttering and trying to whip out ur card

-Before you can, Minho’s arm stretches out in front of u and taps the machine in front of you

-Istg u feel butterflies in ur stomach at Minho being in such close contact with u

-U can feel the heat radiating on ur back

-You get ur ice cream and u go to leave the shop but Minho grabs your arm

-U turn to him questioningly to be met with slightly hurt eyes

-Did I do that to him?

-Yes u fool

-“Sit with me. Please?”

-How can you refuse that

-……………

-It’s so awkward

-“Are you okay? Why are you avoiding me? Did something happen? Just let me know if you’re okay?”

-Owo my heart

-“uh,, no nothing’s happening….. I’m just busy u know??? Hahaaha school is really kicking my ass”

-Minho just nods and takes a spoonful of ice cream so u do the same

-“Just let me know if I can help you in anyway, I’m always here for you. Don’t suffer alone, I hate seeing you so down?”

-………….

-…………

-Honestly,,,,, u just about melt at this

-Putting ur spoon down and u look at him

-Now or never, Y/N

-“Okay…. I’ll let you know what’s the real problem. It’s you, mr lee Minho.”

-Minho is SHOCKED why is he the problem

-“uhhhhhh”

-“Please let me finish or else I’ll never have the courage to do this again. You have no right to be stealing my heart yet again by nearly kissing me in the middle of class. Do you know how embarrassing that was, I really just wanted to kiss you and I would’ve combusted if you did but you didn’t which made it worse. Why didn’t you kiss me? I’ve literally been sending you signals for nearly two years, and that’s saying something because I saw you in your awkward teen phase and still liked you, and you haven’t even responded. So I avoided you because my heart keeps stuttering whenever I’m near you I’m surprised you can’t hear it. I mean you’re so hot I just wanna kiss you, especially since that day all I can think about is your lips as you were SO close to me this is the worst time to confess but I really like you Lee Minho.”

-And breathe Y/N

-And Minho is no better

-How dare his crush confess before he can smh

-He sits in shocked silence trying to process this information

-You, however, are dying

-That’s it, he’s not replying he doesn’t like you Y/N LEAVE

-So u try to

-But as you stand up so does Minho

-And his hand shoots out to grab your shirt and he just plants one on you ????? in the middle of a damn ice cream parlour?????

-UWU

-Ur in shock

-The man of your dreams,,,,, kissing you ???? more likely than you think ??? so u kiss him back ??? ofc u do how could you not

-It tastes of matcha and strawberry ice cream and something,,, so inherently Minho u just wanna keep kissing him tbh

-Y’all break apart and honestly,, you sit back down in shock

-“That…. Was some confession Y/N”

-“Shut up!”

-“Hey, it’s okay babe. I like you too. Sorry my confession isn’t as grand as yours but,,,, I like you and always have done”

-….

-Oh

-“So please, Y/N, be my girlfriend” his hand stretches across the table nervously

-You smile as u see his hand creep across the table and you reach for him, intertwining your fingers

-He smiles back even bigger and pulls you out of the shop

-You guys had a lot of time to make up for ajbfaiubsag

-So,,, Monday rocks around and you walk to school with Minho this time, rather than mooching in with headphones in

-You guys walk to your normal spot before school starts and Minho is telling you some story about Felix, Changbin and Hyunjin when u hear a scream and lots of wolf whistles

-Spoiler: it’s Jisung and the lads

-“YOU OWE ME MONEY I TOLD YOU THIS PLAN WOULD WORK THEY’RE HOLDING HANDS! I AM THE DOCTOR OF LOVE, HAN JISUNG”

-You laugh as you take a seat next to him as chan grumbles about his wallet being drained AGAIN by his kids’ appetites

-As the hollering quietened down Jisung taps ur shoulder

-“Sooo, you guys are official now? After years of pining ???”

-Rather than deigning Jisung with a worded response a wicked plan forms in ur head

-You tapped Minho’s shoulder to divert his attention from Seungmin

-As he faced you, you grabbed his tie and pulled him in for a kiss

-He was a little shocked at how brazen you were bc hello this is school and these are ur friends but honestly,,, he freaking LOVED it

-He smiled into the kiss and one hand rested on your waist as the other rested on your jaw pulling you deeper into the kiss

-“there ARE CHILDREN HERE OH MY GOD” u heard chan yell distantly

-You couldn’t help but break apart from Minho, laughing as you catch chan covering jeongin’s eyes in distress

-You turned back to Jisung

-“Does that answer your question?”

#stray kids scenarios #stray kids imagine #stray kids au #stray kids #stray kids minho #stray kids lee know #lee know scenarios #lee know imagines #stray kids minho scenarios #stray kids minho imagines #i love lee know a lot #he's so beautiful #im going to his lane atm im so sorry chan #forgive me chan

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highonthought · 2 years

Text

happy new year

gonna get fuvked gonna get fu ked gonn get fuked. he and i hung out today again, after i sent him the link to my old account full of diary entries about him and our situation. he said a lot of sweet things, i dont think after one big discussion we'd be ready to consider a realationaip at all, i know its just a lot for me rn. 2 years past and theres a lot to catch up on. thats my main goal really, since learning that he doesnt hate me. we seem on good terms. i was very open with him, jokes mixed in of course. That account was very raw and to the bone of my thoughts. we cleared a lot of the air. we kissed this time. well, we made out jaja. MUAHAHAHA ja. he is so beautiful. and so much more sincere since we last spoke in person. Hes definitely matured. i wonder if i have too, its hard to scope yourself. i made a little spicy joke when we went to the comedy show, and he said he told himself she doesn't like you she doesn't like you she doesn't like you, which is funny considering thats exactly the opposite of what i was trying to imply.

We're going to "sneak out" again tonight, like old times. Although its more of a role play this time around, considering there are no stakes. just me and him and some fooling around

i cant get over how genuine he was when we spoke today. i learned what was in his mind these past years, and just after the breakup. im relieved. and im so glad to have finally been able to tell him the real reasons for why i did. Although it is one of my greatest regrets to this point in age, i cant help but be grateful for the time apart. when we grew on our own, and matured on our own, made life choices on our own. No need to fret on the past, clarity is enough. he changed for the better, and i hope i did too.

he said i was still sweet and kind, but just crackhead energy. i made him laugh like no one else. He said my lips were soft and sweet. part of me is scared to fully enjoy an embrace these moments of deep kindness and sincerity on his part. Though, even if just for tonight, i will allow myself to be swept up by his lure, and sing along to the tune of the siren.

p.s. kissing him was batshit insane. i was nervous bc i didnt know if i was a bad kisser, its been a verrrrryyy very so very long time. body just took over though, and i reveled.

#:)#guero

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survivorreelsmagicwithin · 4 years

Text

Episode 1B - “I'm praying to Yoncé I survive and don't get first boot.”-Jess

no words.

LITERALLY

NO WORDS.

Two points. TWO FUCKING POINTS.

I'm praying to Yoncé I survive and don't get first foot. That ain't a cute look xoxox

i'm already forgetting to search for the idols, i'm already getting paranoid about if i need to start making alliances instead of just enjoying the really cute convos i'm having with ruthie lily and kevin (max is kinda dry and annoying but... we'll try to make it work ig).... and i'm already hating every challenge we do especially this one although i actually really liked the challenge it was so creative and fun, i just hated that i have bad luck and am stupid with the deduction things, HENCE why i havent looked for the idol yet. LOL. so.... tl;dr - things are going perfectly! this hufflepuffle is workin exactly as he should!

I just wanna say we really are the hufflepuffs. 114 moves in like 5 hours, but we did it. Really proud of Ruthie, Landen, Kevin, Max, and I! Sending positive vibes to slytherin. Hope they are okay in this madness.

Yo my tribe? Kinda dope. I think that everyone worked really well together today! I think Joanna kinda took the lead and some of her ideas were... a choice. But! It got us first place! I think that this tribe has a good shot of getting to swap unscathed.

With Slytherin going to tribal, I really hope that someone I don’t know goes, but at the same time I’d be okay with Jess going? I feel like she’s such a sleeper threat in most games I’m in with her and I really just don’t want to compete with that this time around.

I kind of snapped and got myself an idol good until final 6 teehee.

I knew that the Snape's letter or writing or whatever that freak was up to was SOMETHING. Did I get lucky... hell fucking yeah.

A crackhead like me SHOULD NOT have all this POWER.

I also gave Jacob literally the worst clue ever because we are sharing clues ladies xoxoxo

The clue was:

"Snape is taken aback. “That wouldn’t be any business of yours now would it? I wouldn’t want to find out you are spreading false information. I trust you won’t have any issue with that”. Congrats! You’ve discovered Snape Storyline 2! That’s all for the moment, and will end your search for this round."

BOTH ARE HALF TRUE. Just in case he doesn't put 2 and 2 together and now I went from place to place on purpose. He's gonna think now I gave him something of value and I know he's gonna think "No way someone go an idol on day fucking 3".

youtube

CONFESSIONAL 1.1 — Walking into the Great Hall, I saw a few familiar faces... for not good reasons!

First Jacob, who I know from tengaged. He and I were in a similar friend group for a short period before he left it, but we had a rocky relationship. We flirted a bit (blame 16-year-old Nicholas), but that is in the past.

Secondly, Jess... who I just directly sent home in Eve’s The Challenge: Fresh Meat. She did not have great words to say to me (such as I’m condescending), so I was very wary and, honestly, unhappy with her being here.

But, as Kylie Minogue says, it’s better the devil you know.

Flash forward to the Sorting Ceremony, and I’m so happy to be.. Slytherin? I told Mister Vintage (Sammy) and Mister Heinen (Caeleb) that I’m either a Ravenclaw or Hufflepuff, but I suppose I’ve been lying to myself.

Then, I see my tribe: both Jess and Jacob are present. This is a curse wrapped in a blessing wrapped in an enigma. And, I love it.

I hate, hate, hate conflict and bad vibes, so I directly spoke to both. Jacob did not easily recognize me, but remembered me fondly; so, a successful reacquaintance. Jess, on the other hand, was definitely more apprehensive (as was I), but I made one thing clear: the past is the past, and I am declaring my loyalty.

I have been hurt in previous games by shoving the past aside while the other is still grudgingly aiming for revenge, but I feel Jess is different. She apologized to me about her words, which did hurt, and I apologized to her. What I said was honest, so I’m glad to see a fateful blossoming.

The first reward challenge is revealed, and honestly, I’m really bad at participating in pre-merge competitions, because I do not mind tribal. However, I do want to, since we are such a small tribe, focus on maintaining our numbers in case of a swap. We came in second this reward, and honestly, I’m glad to have eaten cupcakes (although I hate cherry). The fact we all chose a dessert and were privately messaged makes me assume someone received an advantage, but who knows...

What I DO know is that I had two separate relationships, so I wanted to lock a trio down (Me, Jess, Jacob), but I obviously did not want to gamebot this early and make the chat day one. So, naturally, i waited until after immunity.

Speaking of immunity... I took charge, because I like it, but also, I wanted to be able to take blame if we lost. I hate the whole “let’s vote someone out cuz they cost us a virtual challenge” this early in the game, it’s a cheap way to vote. I want to vote on loyalty and activity instead. That’s why I am probably going to target Jessie or Vi, but I‘m unsure as to which will be my vote. On one hand, Vi is much less social, but she also contributed a lot to the challenge. I do not want to judge a book by it’s cover, so I will reach out to her and assess her vibe.

I like going to tribal first, because my philosophy is that it’s better to test loyalties now, rather than guess loyalties later.

Regarding other players, Jules and Juls just played in a mini with me and sheeped the majority alliance to screw me over, so I’m not feeling them right now. Bitterness doesn’t exist in my mind: play well and I respect it; sheep and be stupid, and I will gladly dish out the karma.

I’m satisfied with the happenings of this game so far, and I hope to make it further!! This is one of my first real orgs so, I’m em definitely excited. x. nick

Yay we won immunity. Raffy do be carrying our tribe though!

WELL WELL WELL!!!!!!! as far as my relationships go which is where i left off last round, really nothing much has changed about how i feel about or view my tribemates, but in exciting news... we won immunity!! i am not going to be first boot that is so nice, and im hoping that we can keep winning immunity until a swap so I can feel more secure. I think I could stand a shot if we lost on this tribe but i think if so the vote would split 3-2 i dont think i can get a unanimous vote on anyone unless its myself which is NOT WHAT WERE TRYNA DO HERE !! if anything i feel like i have the best chance to wiggle myself in with the girls (lily and ruthie) Max would probably be my ideal first vote if we ever lose an immunity because I know landen can be useful in challenges, but he YET AGAIN addressed me with a name that does not sit well with me he called me a "challengewhore" yet another reference to TS 2020, so this is not a good sign. Ideally I could get landen out and still be set but i know he has a relationship with juls who i also have a relationship with and wish to continue to have in this game, and us going against each other could make that more stressful than it needs to be because i know landen avenged beck for voting juls out maybe juls would do the same for him? Much to think about, but thankfully i dont have to think about it all that hard because yet again we ARE SAFE !!! woo, anyways thats pretty much it hopefully we can keep winning :D

Ahhhh safety feels so nice, I’m glad that I’m not in danger of being the first boot. Also I love the fact that ravenclaw won the first challenge with so little moves HAHA!

I want to go far in this thing with lily and with kevin, my goal right now is to get to merge and owen be alive so I can work with him!

I am very happy to have won this immunity challenge. We barely won, but I managed to pull my tribe to a victory. Emphasis on the "I" part. I am very frustrated with my tribe's lack of challenge activeness and ability. If the time did not work for them, then I do not know why they even suggested doing it at 2 PM. This challenge would have gone faster if I had done everything myself. In the end, though, I hope this helps in me staying in the game because I am a necessity if they want to ever win a challenge in first place. I highly doubt that they could do it without me.

So I’m currently writing this with one hand because my cat decided to lie on my other one anyways Nobody is really talking about the vote which means it’s probably me going but I’ll see what I can do to change that

Here's a breakdown of my first few experiences since I am writing this a few hours before the first tribal council.

FIRST I was cast in this game along with a BUNCH of people that are icons across different formats of Tumblr Survivor - so that's intimidating. Mostly because my play style is kinda vanilla in comparison. I gotta find a way to stand out or I'm going to be thrown out fast.

SECOND There's a twist that will probably have some major effect at some later point in the game where everyone is added to the Great Hall. I think that it's for convenience of posting things like results and challenges so it only has to be sent to one chat... but also so that we can feel THEMATIC which is a lot of fun.

The game started in the Great Hall and we got sorted into our houses and the implication was that it's random but.. I don't think it's entirely true if I can read into what the hosts said to me once I was sorted into Gryffindor (something about running out of room in Hufflepuff) - because I definitely didn't say Gryffindor in my application.

THIRD My tribe has the following people: Joshua, Juls, Raffy, Autumn, and myself.

I do not know how many of theme said Gryffindor when they applied but also did not want to bring it up to them as I am masquerading as a brave idiot. :D

Anyway, I started conversations with all of them and they all seem very sweet!!

I've played in a game before with Raffy where he was super snakey but also a great ally until he tried to snake me. So there's that... he's also an "over the top" type of person so he takes charge a lot of the time and voices his opinions about everything. I hope we can create some sort of working relationship in the game, but I think that he will tell me the truth if he does align against me.

Autumn is super chill and super strategic-minded. She puts lots of thought into all of her decisions and makes calls that benefit her getting to the end while trying to align with the right people. If I can't get to the FTC of this game... TBH I want to make sure she gets there. I played with her in one game and we both were tossed out one after another when the game turned on our "side". I don't think that relationship will factor into this game as it was forever ago and we both kinda play "new" every time we start a game but I'm hoping she will want to try and play with me just because I've seen how great she is at the game.

Juls is a very fun person who seems to always be having a great time! I found out she lives in Texas too and that she was excited to get to know me because we are from the same state. I was like.. do I know you? Because when she messaged me the way she did implied that she knew who I was and I was thinking OH NO what have people said.

Joshua seems really sweet. He hasn't added incredibly much to conversations so far with him but he has contributed some fun things. I love that he tries to be entertaining, but as I see it so far he's the first person I'd be willing to vote out if it came to our tribe going to council... though of course, having said that I bet they've all declared me their first choice.

FOURTH The reward challenge was the Letter plus Number challenge so as predicted...

I did terribly and earned 0 points for our tribe and was SO happy it was not for immunity.

The immunity challenge was a Choose Your Own Adventure Puzzle.

We got a slow start in that I feel like everyone was afraid to make a move because that would put a target on whoever "failed for the team". Then me and Raffy kind of got things rolling with him taking the main leader role and me taking on a secondary role either agreeing with his suggestions or contributing a suggestion for what we should do.

There was a misunderstanding with the competition and we ended up making a whole bunch of extra moves because it was unclear to us that the letters we found at a later part of the challenge were able to be changed into numbers at a lockbox so we did a bunch of extra stuff... and I was resigned to the fact we were going to the first tribal when we go surprised that Slytherin... DID WORSE!!! O_O

Anyway... I still have no alliances or confirmed "working game" relationships and I really don't feel like starting those conversations at the moment so if I am out of the ones established or on the bottom of one that will add me to "pick me up" for later votes then I blame myself for not trying hard enough in that category.

FIFTH I definitely didn't just now search for the idol and waste two days that I could have searched other times. Nope! Not me!! :)

Anyway I went on a trip to Hagrid's Hut because I love me some Hagrid and I figured he'd let me in since I"m a Gryffindor and he loves us the best (you know, like a reverse Snape)... I dug through all of his junk and found his umbrella. Apparently I liked that it was pink and then left his hut.

To be honest, I probably should have taken his dragon's egg and turned him in... maybe could have gotten him fired.

Someone finally got me to come out of retirement- can you believe it

It's been cute so far and I have no complaints, probably cause the hosts wisely put me, Owen, and Dan in separate corners lmao. Yooo if we all make it to merge?? Hell hath no fury. But we will cross that bridge when we get there! And for now I enjoy the calm before the storm. I deadass forgot how to be an org so I need all the time I can get to socialize and reacclimate. Me checking Skype more than once a year? Don't remember ever doing that. I love Raffy, it's always good to see Chips, I think I like Juls, and I'm not sure how I feel about Joshua but it's fine. I like Gryffindor cause we have no beef and I hope it stays that way.

ok so my tribe lost :( big sad. but im def ok bc jess is soooo close to me and we made a threesome with nick so. i think jessie is an easy first boot bc shes not around as much as vi. but really its our decision at the end of the day!

here’s the hot goss.. i’m a little upset i didn’t get anyone i Know on my house/tribe but also grateful HSBSNSNN all i know is that so far i’ve been doing pretty solid in securing relationships with those on my team (at least.. i hope so :flushed:) and i’m hoping they all like me hehe. kinda praying to just mist my way to merge where i can be united with people who like me enough to keep me around still.. >:D

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survivormagictreehouse · 4 years

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Episode #7 “#Zachexposed Party” -Jess

-VI was voted out and now I’m forever sad. I wish you the best VI and hope you feel better soon! Goal #1 can never be accomplished now so that’s a bummer. But at least my alliance member RACHAEL wasn’t voted out! And now we’re doing Touchy Subjects with 95% negative answers. Drama here we come!

-We won another Challenge! Annie Tribe curse has been officially broken! Touchy Subjects was the name, and me winning was the game. I don’t ducking know. But I scored the highest on my tribe and won a ~mysterious package~ which turned out to be an idol clue. “Find the idol will no longer be a walk on the shore. In order to succeed, two items you will need.” So at least three searches in the idol search I suppose. I might share the clue with JESS and BIRCH and have them help me find the idol. Though I might just tell them part of the clue or something so they don’t have the whole picture. I’m undecided. I’m really hoping the other tribe votes off ALI, COLLIN or RUTHIE, since I think I’m the least likely to work with any of those three. RACHAEL must stay, BODHI I could work with and TIMMY I’m neutral on. CINDI is a bit of a wildcard but I think I could manage to work with her as well. JESS is speculating there’s a merge after the vote and I’m inclined to agree with that. A new idol search and we’ll be at 13 players which is a typical merge. I did not come into this game expecting to win, or even make the merge. But now I think I have a real shot at going far. Imagine me getting to FTC twice in a row in Atomic. How cool would that be?

Death by Skittle

-(this is for last round i am a bit late) Last round in the video challenge, which I ended up somehow becomming the editor for. First of all, I asked for the video clips to be in by sunday night so that I could do the video and be done with it, but Chips put it off and ended up making us wait till Monday morning which really set us back. Then Keegan submitted videos with almost no sound and little feeling so it was hard to use any of his clips. Then Jess decided to edit the video I made, and when she did that the lyrics didnt match the song anymore and it almost cost us the challenge. We also found out Birch has a +10 advantage, so need to be aware of that.Birch and Chips are my biggest targets on this tribe, and i am still ina really good spot with Zach and Jess, and close allies with Gavin and Keegan

-This round was touchy subjects. The tribe thought that I was the mvp of the tribe which makes me a possible target with the merge coming up. It was also revealed birch is not in a great place on my tribe and they also said they believe the majority of the tribe thinks I am next to go. I am concerned about my placement with them. Overall this round made me a bit nervous, but excited to hope for a merge in the future.

-There's a Mesopotamia/Svalbard alliance with Bodhi, Rachael, Collin, and me which I love cause I love all those people except Rachael sometimes but she hasn't had to do schoolwork once this game so that's nice. I'm just kidding I love Rachael as long as she doesn't have homework. Cause when she has homework that means she's voting me out. I swear the moment she has to do schoolwork its' done. And then Ali and Bodhi are on weird ground because of how Bodhi got rid of Ali in Lover BUT I REALLY WANT US TO HAVE AN ALLIANCE CALLED THE LOVERS CAUSE 1) Ali is very loyal so, like, I want to work with him 2) THAT NAME IS GREAT AND I DEMAND IT IN MY LIFE Then there's Timmy who has only spoken to me on call or in tribe chat. Nothing beyond that. So, like, bye Timmy. Bodhi also has an issue with Timmy but Rachael swears he's okay. But I don't want to have two Timmys anyway. What even are their last initials? Don't care enough to learn them. BYE TIMMY! Then there's Ruthie who is very sweet and I don't think super strategic? At least not at this point. She just seems like a nice mom. I don't even know if she is a mom. But she would be a nice one to, like, a 3? year old. Idk. Mom vibes. So I'd like to keep her in and I'm assuming that touchy subjects leads to a swap or merge (but this is a very early merge) so, like, hopefully she doesn't have to go after Timmy. It's absolutely insane to me that all of the tribals I've been to have been easy votes? Something spicy needs to happen sometime. Other tribe has had interesting votes. Not us. Couldn't be us.

-So Timmy thinks Collin, Rachael, him, and I are voting Bodhi out and possibly Ruthie as well. Yet he has still not messaged me once. Sir, why would I vote out Bodhi, whom I love dearly, to save your sorry ass when you have not even spoke to me? This dude either has an idol or is just crazy cause, like, that is not how you play Survivor. Do you actually want to stay? Then talk.

-okay! so we have quite a bit to catch up on... but on the bright side. WE WON IMMUNITY FOR ONCE! HALLELUJAH! i got sent to the treehouse which was EXCITING and i found the idol clue... which was literally to the idol i had so that was DISAPPOINTING to say the least. however, i also found the location of the other idol but someone else has it, which is good info to have at least. i posted a lot of my important information in my confessional, so i am just going to repost it here. basically, jess and i had a really good call about how we are not on the bottom, but are not in a good spot come merge. it's clear who is in power over here (zach, keegan, timmy)--because birch is with keegan, so we can't make a move against zach. so, if we lose again chips will leave (who is arguably a number for us because jess has him wrapped around his finger). on the other hand, i kind of have an in with zach and keegan--so i want to be able to milk that for as long as possible to get information on others in the game. but i am really not liking the closeness of timmy and zach especially (kind of keegan, but he has been a bit more lowkey the past few rounds, which is smart on his part). i just have a lot of adjusting to do, and i need to start planting seeds to turn people against each other (especially if we are merging soon). i feel good with rachael obviously, but i don't know how close she is with keegan/zach--but i do think she would turn on them eventually (just not anytime soon). im hoping the apparent alliance of 6 (now 4) and keegan/timmy/zach kind of battle one another and take each other out and i can just play the middle and watch them crumble.

-ARE WE SURPRISED MY CONFESSIONAL IS LATE AGAIN? I AM NOT... BUT I AM SORRY. anyways, this round the challenge was touchy subjects which was LOVELY for me because i am fucking AMAZING at knowing what other people are thinking so i basically knew i had it in the bag from the get-go. When we won, and I got that secret advantage which was an idol clue... that literally made no sense to me. however, i think i need to find two keys in order to get the idol... so, the first step for me is to hunt down these goddamn keys i guess. anyways, back to the tribe stuff... so, following the challenge and the post-winning glee emerged, jess and i went on call and discussed everything we were thinking. we were both very worried about crackhead zach's connections, and basically knew that we were merging, and he would be kind of untouchable as a result. however, if we were to have thrown the challenge, it would have been the perfect opportunity to take him out. however, it was too late to consider that, and we just had to continue our discussion about the game further down the line. so, on the topic of zach, jess mentions the "alliance" made between her, timmy, and zach. we both knew zach and timmy were very close, but this just confirmed it even more. basically, zach brought up the idea of making a 9 person alliance excluding ali, birch, chips, and i believe cindi. which, from that point, they could side with either me/keegan, or side with the other four (i don't know why i am being paired with keegan but go off i guess). i obviously didn't like hearing that, and it made it even more clear to me that he is playing not only a messy game, but an extremely wishy-washy game too. his loyalties seem to be all over the place, and i never see myself being one of his top priorities with collin, timmy, and rachael (and others) in the game. so, when the time is right... i am going to be the one to send his ass to ponderosa. i just hope i can keep my idol in the process for protection further down the line.

https://youtu.be/UolbDzsPoho (round 6)

https://youtu.be/wLA8Pt4bXlQ

https://youtu.be/jn8XxFsmPQU

So it’ll probably be between myself and Bodhi at tribal tonight because I don’t really want him gone. He’s talking to me about a plan but he’s not giving an concrete answers and with that then I can’t help both of us. I already told him ruthie but he didn’t want to and I said that’s fine I only said her bc she seemed the easiest option, tbh I don’t really want her gone either since she’s not a threat. But when asking who he wants after that bc he said we could have our og tribe and ruthie vote together he didn’t give a name. The concern is, Rachel and Cindi are friends and I don’t think will vote each other. The biggest threat is Rachel because of her outside connections with Cindi, Zach, and I think Timmy Z, so concern is there.

https://youtu.be/cX7Ieh2o3QU

https://youtu.be/HGm7ukcUEcU

Ladies, gentlemen, or whatever you identify as.... welcome to Phase 1 of the.... #Zachexposed party... hosted by me, Jess! I've decided I've been tame for too long and there needs to be a shake up. I haven't decided how quickly I want to do this BUT if I win first immunity I'm going for it. Zach is arguably the most dangerous player in the game right now. He's literally playing the game I typically play and I see right through it. No "large groups", working with small groups only, making people feel like they are his "true number ones" and attempting to align their interests with all the other groups. In his mind right now he sees himself covered by 8 people.

The 8 people: 1. Jess 2. Timmy Z 3. Gavin 4. Cindi 5. Rachael 6. Collin 7. Collin 8. Either Timmy L or Bodhi How does this all work exactly?

Let me break it all down for you: He has an alliance with: - Me & Timmy - Keegan & Gavin & (Rachael) - Me & Gavin & Timmy & Keegan - Connections with: --> Collin/Rachael/Cindi on the other tribe. I don't think it is a coincidence that the other tribe wants him on their team... ANYWAYS.

What is phase 1 exactly? - Planting the seeds, laying down the blue print, and rallying the misfits. How: Rallying the troops: - I told Chips about the old tree house idol clue and the whole next round we are merging message I recieved. --> Obviously that builds a continued line of communication and hopefully trust. He feels pretty alone and I really think he's CRUCIAL to my game. - I also told Birch about my findings because those two (Chips and Birch) would never compare notes on me I don't think? --> Birch also feels a bit alone and they are CRUCIAL to my game. Lastly, I have an "alliance" with everyone else and they will tell Gavin everything before me so I'll be in the know.

The ammo: - I can use the fact that the other tribe wants ZACH with them as another counter point - Confessionals of proof that Zach/Collin have been close recently which might not even mean anything to people but it counts when you got NOTHING. - The knowledge of him having an alliance with me/Timmy - The knowledge of him having an alliance with Keegan/Gavin - The knowledge of him having an alliance with Keegan/Gavin/Rachael - The knowledge of him being extra close with Rachael so whatever connections she made.. he has a head start on. - I also know he's close with Collin so they could essentially do the whole "control one side and you control the other"

HOWEVER THE MOST IMPORTANT PIECE OF EVIDENCE/ AMMO IS: - Zach has basically given me the key to the palace today where he told me we could flip on Gavin/Keegan at 9 and "go with the other four" meaning.. Cindi/Bodhi/Collin/Rachael. Meaning.... he exposed who is he close with and people might wonder how they fit into his plans. Can't go to final 2 with 8 other people... 7 people will get cut and that's on mathematics. I'm not entirely sure how to go about this all... this is probably going to either tank my game or change the game. If Zach is as well connected as I think he is... this is going to be hard. I'll need to flip the people not in on that plan such as Ali, Chips, Birch, myself, Gavin, Ruthie... but there is NO WAY Ali just votes with us like that.. he has his allegiances. So I have to be subtle about this or I go gun blazing and be crackedt. I know we are merging tonight and it will be a new game and I'm excited.

-this tribal is about to be messy af. timmy threw my name out to ali, bodhi and ruthie with the logic that "itd be entertaining" and that im well connected which is fair. but im also well connected so like...ali and bodhi both told me about it which is cute. so if everything goes the way timmy wants it to go, its gonna be ali, bodhi ruthie on me and me, cindi and collin on bodhi leaving timmy as the swing vote. HOWEVER the tribe wants timmy out unan. bodhi and i might throw votes on ruthie just to protect me in case of an idol but yeah. its gonna be a fun one.

-there has been talk of a 2-1-1-1-1-1 split for this vote. i really wanna do it but cindi said no :'(

-also if i find out through this whole mess that Bodhi was playing me, i think i will cry for the rest of my life

hello so confessional time. I've been really deflated and second guessing myself but I'm turning it around. timmy is going home tonight and love him but he is donezo. in other news: - cindi, collin and bodhi...? defo a group. - had a kill bill sirens moment thinking cindi was blindsiding me earlier because of a miscommunication related to the fact that there are two timmys in the cast - am now in an alliance with cindi collin and ruthie co loves of my life - I think I made rachael mad today NNN my bad but im prepared and READY for 13th

So... I guess I am not very well liked on my tribe based on touchy subjects. I kind of got that impression anyway since I have been borderline inactive with the move. Anyway Jess told me that there is a merge coming up according to the tree house or whatever so... I hope I dont fizzle out and get booted right at merge. Not sure who to connect with but!!! I am ready to swing if the other side needs me .

Click HERE to watch the Round 7 Cast Assessment!

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memoriesofprojectkids-blog · 6 years

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The Crackhead

The Crackhead As the blood slowly dried up the side of his mouth, I thought he was dead. He’d been lying still for the past thirty minutes and no one had even bothered trying to help him up.. If he was dead, an ambulance would come to take him and if he was alive, then he was no longer their problem. I’d just witnessed the worst beat down I’d ever seen in my life and I just kept wondering…..is he dead? It was the middle of the afternoon during the fall of ’87. Me and some of the other neighborhood kids were playing basketball in Vegas playground inside of our project. Vegas wasn’t the formal name for the playground, however, this became its adopted name because it was the main place for gambling in the projects and in the immediate area. Within the projects, many people sold drugs but one of the unofficial rules was no one sold in the main playground areas where most of the neighborhood kids would play. Maybe it wasn’t an official “rule” but more like a guideline. In fact, with it being the 80’s and shootouts being common, Vegas saw its fair share of action. What was also becoming more common was crack. The crack cocaine epidemic hit the inner cities fast and hard. It initially started out as a party drug but its cheap price and highly addictive nature turned out to be far more potent than most people bargained for. I can vividly remember neighbors who were “normal” one day and then seemingly overnight become a crackhead. It was similar to watching a zombie flick in how, once they got bit, they were gone. Additionally, these weren’t just anonymous people who appeared from out of the blue. These were mothers, fathers, sons, daughters, sisters, brothers, uncles and aunts. For me, some were those I considered to be my old heads and close neighbors. As a kid, you didn’t really see the actual transition. One day they were regular and the next thing you knew they were stoned out of their mind asking a nine year old kid could they “borrow” his Excite Bike Nintendo game. Equally disturbing was the violence which surrounded the crack game. Seeing gunfights and knowing individuals who were shot, paralyzed and even killed, became a common thing. But at the same time, it didn’t really seem strange. If you witnessed these scenes regularly it appeared rather ordinary. Some people would say it resembled the movies, but I don’t agree. A movie has a start, a middle and an ending. Then the credits roll. In the movies there’s a script and an angle. In real life, stuff just happened no slow motion movements, no camera shot of a menacing character pulling their gun and no sad music playing in the background as someone is laid out on the cold concrete with a bullet to the chest. To make matters worse, economic times were very rough in the 80’s. You know the hood motto for the Reagan era “The rich get richer and the poor don’t get a f*ckin thing”. In the eyes of many black youth, they had two choices: One was working at McDonald’s and the other was selling drugs on the corner. A lot of people took option B. Not, to say it was the right choice because as I became older and understood economics, I realized if you started out at McDonald’s as a teen and worked your way up to least a mid-level job in corporate, you would make a lot more money (and have better job security) than standing out on a corner, but those types of lessons aren’t taught in schools. It was the middle of the afternoon in the fall of 1987. Although the neighborhood hustlers didn’t openly sell drugs where kids were playing, there were no rules to where they kept their drug stash. Within the neighborhood and especially amongst the kids, we all kind of knew where they hid their drugs. In a bag of chips behind the bushes. Under the third bench next to the monkey bars. By the sewer grate next to the abandoned car. It was just common knowledge. On that day, as we were playing basketball on one of the crates, we saw a crackhead, wandering around the playground area. Normal. What wasn’t normal was how he kept pacing back and forth, looking around. It didn’t take a genius to figure out what he was trying to do and it also didn’t take him long to find what he was looking for. After a few minutes, his eyes caught a small bag, hidden behind some bushes. Initially, he seemed as if he wanted to be a bit more covert but he just dipped down, grabbed the bag and then looked around nervously. A second later, one of the kids playing ball with us, ran around the corner and told some of the hustlers what happened. Seconds later, another older guy at the end of playground shouted, “A yo Dave, one of them smokers grabbed ya stash.” The crackhead began to fidget and then nervously walked away from where he’d grabbed the stash. He must have been already high because as he walked through us kids, he actually tried to hide in my friend’s jacket……. while my friend has his jacket on! My friend shoved him away and the crackhead began to try and getaway. When I say getaway, I mean he ran into the house of one of his relatives and locked the door. “Oh shit, here come Dave now!” The dealer whose stash was stolen went to check his spot and immediately began to walk in the direction where people were pointing out the crackhead. His crew was behind him as they walked across the playground to where the crackhead was staying. Soon, dozens of people were standing in front of the house, waiting for Dave and his crew to get there. For me, I didn’t have to go far, the house was right next door (more on that later). Dave and his crew walked up to the door and kicked it. The door didn’t give way but it shook the frame. They banged on the door and one of them tried to pull the knob off. Someone inside quickly peeked out the front curtain and then closed it. After a few seconds a woman slowly opened the door “I know..I…I…I know what he did was wrong but he not here, he left…..” she said as Dave and his crew tossed her out of the way. By now there were at least 30-40 people standing around outside the home, me being one of them. You couldn’t really see much but you could hear the punches, the kicks and the sound of someone getting hit with a chair. Suddenly one of the guys said, “take this nigga outside!”. Soon the crowd parted as Dave and his crew dragged the crackhead out, into the front yard. They then proceeded, to stomp and beat the man into the ground. There were only a few punches because after about 5 seconds the guy was laid flat out in the dirt. They then proceeded to stomp him to the point in which he was just motionless. As they stood over him, a few of the guys spit on him and tried to wake him back up to no avail. Then, Dave, the leader of the crew began to look around and saw a large slap of concrete at the side of the garden. I can’t give any logical explanation for why a giant piece of concrete was just lying around but it was the projects and……random items just happened to be lying around. Dave then went over, picked up the concrete over top of his head and looked around at the crowd. Not one person uttered a phrase to prevent what was going to happen, everyone just stood there with their mouths open. He then slammed the concrete onto the back of the man who let out a yelp. It wasn’t a holler or scream but a yelp. The man writhed in pain as Dave and his crew slowly walked away, as the crowd began to dissipate. Since I lived next door, I stood there for a few minutes wondering if the guy was going to ever get up. About an hour later, was when the two police officers saw him on the ground and checked on him. They tried to ask him some questions but he was unresponsive, so they surveyed the area and simply walked away. By now everything in the projects was back to normal, with the exception of a man who probably had just had his spinal cord broken lying on the ground. To provide some insight, I would like to provide some closure on what happened to the man. Did he live? Did an ambulance ever come and take him? Was he permanently damaged? I honestly don’t know. The last image I have of the man is of him on the ground with people causally walking by him. Many years later, as a young adult, I saw Dave again. In fact, I’d seen him numerous times since the incident but because of the age difference, we never really spoke and we rarely were in the same circles. However we both happened to be at Joe, the neighborhood barber. Joe and another customer had also been there that day and for some reason, someone asked Dave about the incident. Interestingly enough, Dave expressed heartfelt regret over the situation. As life progressed, he’d learned a lot about the world and had gone on to college, finished graduate school and started a family. In his previous life, he explained how he didn’t really think about the consequences of his actions. Yet, life had taught him many lessons which he’d learned to carry on and become a productive member of society. He now does spoken word poetry and you can see him at numerous venues around the city. I doubt if he’ll go into these kind of tales, but from what I can say, he’s honestly a great guy and a great role model to the youth. Reflecting on this incident, there were so many contradicting and powerful aspects to it. With the crack cocaine era being a prominent aspect of life, such violence was not unheard of. At the time, many people felt it was worth it but when you talk with those who were involved that world, most wish they’d chosen another path. After 10-15 years, it became common to see both users and dealers not living the most comfortable lives. Personally, I also learned a very important lesson which remained within me throughout my youth. I’d always understood this but it became deeply embedded in me when I saw the rock being slammed on that man’s back. The lesson was……. SAY NO TO DRUGS!

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aowanders-blog · 7 years

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Homeless to Travel Blogger

Travel Life

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My travel story started out as I drove my rental car with no license 2500 miles west with less then $3000 to my name. I was high on life & on the open road racing towards my future in LA. The Rockies were towering over me as I pulled into this unknown mountain town called Aspen. The vibe and pulse of this city radiating this magnetic energy should have stopped me dead in my travel tracks, and held me captive for decades to come. I often look back on that dinner stop knowing my likes/dislikes, hobbies, personality, and the friends that I’ve accumulated today and wonder what if? If only I’d been more honest with myself or less prideful maybe the series of pitfalls on the horizon would have been avoided. Maybe I’d be that veteran ski bum that had finally figured out how to avoid all the negatives of the lifestyle while sipping a cold one on my porch surrounded by mountainous beauty as I listen to the crackle of the fire & river flow by with my wife and kids. Its a mental image that creeps up on me from time to time along with the memory of the old couple telling me travel life gives the test first & the lessons second as I walked out the door.

Racing through the red rock landscape of Utah my thoughts wondered the mental obstacle course of my first big trip.

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I’ll never forget the silent thought I spoke to myself when the Vegas lights lit up the 104 degree night: “Well atleast I won’t freeze if I have to sleep outside.” An observation no one should ever register. My first night in LA amounted to listening to waves crash on some random beach while gazing at twinkling stars. There I slept I had made it. Some would have let their hair down. Party for a few days. Celebrate based on faith that all is well, but I was alone & living in a rental car that I couldn’t afford. It was time to get a job, house & then celebrate. Little did I know the city of Angels had no intention of rolling out the red carpet for me. Every probable thing I tried was met with complete failure. I Couldn’t get an apartment! Couldn’t find a job! Got denied by three colleges! Denied by the Navy for traffic tickets! Even got denied for unpaid internships & volunteer gigs. I was running out of money. Living in a rental car I stopped paying for weeks ago. Nothing was going right! That fatal night I had enough awareness to hold my breathe at a DWI checkpoint outside of El Cajon. It didn’t matter though the police officer told me the rental company wanted their car back. I was getting arrested for driving without a license, but it was my lucky day because the jail had no room for me. So they towed my house, gave me a citation with a court date & sent me on my way. I guess its better then being charged with an underage DWI & Grand Theft Auto, but maybe that would have been a better path. I had enough street smarts to talk my way out of getting robbed by 3 kids in Venice Beach later that night. The next morning I had enough athleticism to avoid being stabbed by two homeless men. My cardio was tested when a crackhead took off with my bag that held my prized possessions & pathetic bank roll. That bag never left my side again. I lived at the beach because the free showers also served as a free laundromat. I found a 29 cent donut shop that if I only ate one donut a day would give me 30-35 days to find a solution to this problem. Drugs, alcohol & gangs were readily accessible, but I had enough discipline to steer clear. My travel life was being carved out on the streets of LA.

After a couple more weeks of captaining this struggle bus I threw up the white flag, and was ready to hang my head, swallow my pride & head home tail tucked between my legs admitting defeat. Fate must have taken pity on me or just wanted to see how far I would sink before admitting that devastatingly soul crushing defeat. It didn’t matter that the job being offered to me paid less than $200 a week. Didn’t even register with me that being a courier costs gas money. Not to mention I still didn’t have a license, and every day at work threatened jail time for simply driving down the road without a valid piece of plastic in my pocket. Looking back on it I don’t even know if what I was delivering was legal. I had a way to make money $6-$12 per drop. It required no skills, no uniform, no certifications or anything else the modern world now requires. All I had to do was find destinations in my trusty map book. Yes I said map book because google hadn’t even been invented yet. AOL was in charge of the internet. Facebook was still a decade away from becoming a global icon, and the smartest feature a cell phone had at that point was Nextel’s two way radio push-to-talk. There was no texting, SIRI, craigslist. Heck I don’t even think Ebay, Amazon, Yahoo or Napster were even around yet?!? No one was nudging, poking, tweeting, snapchatting or even uploading while I was traveling from the temples of Thailand to the beaches of Brazil.

TRAVEL LIFE BY WAY OF SEASONAL EMPLOYERS

How did I get from homeless documents courier to world traveler? Seasonal Adventure Jobs I’ve been traveling the world by way of seasonal employers since 1998. After struggling for a couple more months in LA I came across a newspaper “Help Wanted” ad in Malibu that offered employee housing. A job? Free food? AND housing……YES PLEASE!!!!! I hadn’t even applied yet, but I couldn’t be more excited. Three things I desperately needed to enhance the quality of my life. I didn’t need any more motivation than that, and off I went to print a pathetic resume to apply at this unknown restaurant. I had no idea the door I was about to open or the world I was about to discover. After getting hired on the spot I quit my job & set my sites on a life of travel I never even knew existed. It was a life changing experience. The concept of an employer providing housing, good pay, food & amazing friends was foreign to me but overwhelmingly welcoming. That magical summer provided me with life long friends, new hobbies, great pay & an introduction to a life of travel. I was hooked, but didn’t know where to turn. This dream job was coming to an end, and wouldn’t reopen its doors for another 6 months. There was no way I was traveling back to the beaches & 29 cent donuts, but back then there were no blogs or job boards like MyAdventureJobs. So I tapped into the only travel network I could find Beach Bums & Hippies. They pointed me towards the woods and the waves. Their logic was sound and I found samples of success over the next few years. Bouncing between Florida, Minnesota & California I traveled. I even made a guest appearance in New Orleans during Mardi Gras one season. Nothing like that first season though. Travel had me chasing ghosts trying to duplicate what I found in Malibu all those years ago. While bouncing around the country from random employer to random destination I was being trained at a school I was unaware I was attending. There was no tuition. The professor was my peers, and the classroom was my daily interaction. My major was the pursuit of happiness. My minor was travel, & my focus was acceptance. I was getting my PHD in goodbyes & fresh starts while constantly searching for that elusive adventure my soul ached for.

MY FIRST INTERNATIONAL TRAVEL ADVENTURE

I found myself back in Minnesota desperately trying to acquire purpose, sense of accomplishment and adventure. The tiniest sample of success would have been monumental. Instead all I found was heartache & disappointment around every corner. The unexpected passing of my father sent me reeling for lifelines only to find my independence had pushed my ships of support beyond the marina they used to dock in. Months of hibernation ensued until out of desperation I bolted to Chicago unknowingly about to become a Junior in the University of Globetrotting. I moved in with a former co-worker, grabbed a job, joined a hockey league & even enrolled in college. Everything that LA wasn’t Chicago was. It was “big city” with “small town” mentality, and I LOVED it. I was getting a taste of the travel life I had been seeking, but life was about to throw its never ending curve balls. My roommate moved out of state, my job went out of business & design school was too expensive. Retreat to Minnesota was the only option. With everything packed in the Uhaul I just needed to get my stuff from campus. It was the most depressing train ride yet to date. I had failed again. Had to say goodbye to a girlfriend, friends & co-workers again. I had to go home with defeat stamped on my forehead again. Fate was about to take pity on me or laugh at me ….once again. Campus had a buzz it normally didn’t have. Faces that weren’t normally there, and languages with heavy accents filled the lobby. A mulatto guy introduced himself. We talked about the city, school and summer plans. Before I knew it he was offering me a job in France. He had a solution for all my excuses, and offering more money then I had ever been paid. Why would I say no?

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Etienne made all the travel arraignments over the next month to get me to France. It included 3 buses, 2 planes & a train. What I wasn’t telling anyone was that for the last 6 months I had been scouring the internet for adventure, and I was going to France to join the French Foreign Legion. Out of desperation I considered this the answer to my travel prayers, and in the most unlikely of ways the French Foreign Legion saved my life. Somewhere in there I must have slipped it to my brother because out of concern he flew to Europe to intercept me at a coffee shop in the 2nd arrondissement of Paris. We agreed to backpack around Europe for a few weeks to recalibrate my life, and deter me from joining the French Foreign Legion. We visited the Eiffel Tower, attended soccer games, ate pizza with raw eggs, escaped gypsies in the park & played pictionary every time we needed to speak to someone. Eventually we made our way up to London to visit a friend from Cypriot living in England that I had met through an online game. His family hosted us while we took in a few other matches, partied in New Brighton & played poker in West Kensington. The history, culture & diversity along with the freedom of which we roamed was very appealing. Unfortunately I was locked on to the allure of the French Foreign Legion. When it was time for him to return I was faced with a choice: Do I or don’t I? He had all the right words at all the right times. He’d done his research! With no direction I sat there reflecting, and watching life all around me. On queue like it was scripted out of a movie here comes Etienne to sit next to me on the grass below the Eiffel Tower. We chatted for hours about anything and everything. Like my brother he had all the right words at the right time. So off I went to work at the hostel.

HOSTEL LIFE

Unaware that something as trivial as babysitting a building for a couple hours a day was going to change my life forever I treated it like any other random job. Temporary & unsatisfying. It was only supposed to be for the summer, and my job was to be the night auditor from 11pm-7am. This wasn’t your normal hostel though. It only catered to English speaking travelers. Every room had its own shower, bathroom, TV & came at the price of 176 Francs a night. Not only that, but we locked the doors from midnight to 6am. So I really only worked 2 hours a shift, and slept the other 6. I was a power tourist in France with access to anywhere I wanted. Surrounded by travelers, no expenses & only 2 hour blocks of responsibilities there was really only one obvious choice: absorb as much of the lifestyle as I could. That first 8 months I clicked off every possible attraction there was within 7,000 miles. I became a master networker within this secret globetrotter community. I had places to stay and people to meet everywhere I traveled. Ideas piling up in my notebook.

Postit notes covered the walls of my room. My address book grew from couple pages to a couple books. It was a whirlwind of adventures, and I couldn’t get enough. I watched football matches in London, partied in Thailand, snorkeled in Australia, hiked in Norway, experimented in Amsterdam & fell in Love in Barcelona. Obviously I had my blinders on to keep reality at bay. I was having so much fun I never wanted to go home. Then I met Casey Paris was her last stop on a year around the world before heading back to Iowa. Standing on the Eiffel Tower on her final night she said, “It feels different. I didn’t want to be what I was before I left……Anonymous.” Unfortunately like my brother & Etienne she said the right words at the right time. One of my favorite books by the way. It was like someone had cast a spell on me, and those 15 words unlocked a raging waterfall of thoughts. I was anonymous. All the memories and wonderful moments during my stay in France were shared with temporary friends that for a brief moment in time our relationship was magical, but consequently an unavoidable tragedy of living a life of travel.

ALASKA TRAVEL ADVENTURES

Casey’s words sent me on international internet treasure hunt. The results were deflating. Fortunately while sitting in a cafe in Rouen, where Joan of Arc was hung, a zipline in Alaska called me to come work for them. Don’t even remember applying to them. I had never heard or even knew what a zipline was. Alaska wasn’t even on my radar to visit let alone live and they wanted me there in 3 days. My bags were packed. Flight was booked, and I needed a change. I didn’t have any idea what Alaska had to offer, but I was game. Did absolutely no research. Packed everything I didn’t need, and overlooked everything I did need. I didn’t own a tent. Didn’t pack a sleeping bag, and brought nothing but city clothes. I was a greenhorn about to step into my element and graduate from the University of Globetrotters.

The tone was set as soon as I boarded the plane. I was traveling out of my element only to find my element, and I wasn’t going to say “NO” to anything. Alaska introduced herself as magnificent & massive. I arrived early evening and got hoodwinked into paying the bill for my PT cruiser driving host Gigi at a local restaurant. Why thats a permanent memory I don’t know, but this left with me about $80 to my name until an unknown payday. Eventually she dropped me off at employee housing, gave me the $2 tour, some guidelines & left me with a group of strangers. Strangers that were going to provide the most magnificent & majestic five months of my life. I introduced myself to Ketchikan humble reserved & cautious.

On a pre-season outting at a campground on the North end of the island I terminated that reputation by Bill Goldberg spearing a drunk guy talking trash to my new roommate. I had reset the tone from “what do you have to offer” to “are you ready for me?”

We were all new to Alaska! New to tour guiding! New to this array of employee housing. The summer motto was “Bring It” & we brought it. The personalities & mentalities of that summer were eclectic but euphoric. The memories, rallying support, unbounded loyalty & generosity has no barometer of measurement for my gratitude of those amazing individuals that made up the Alaska Canopy Adventures crew of 2008. Twenty four hours a day we were attached to one another, and every day brought a new adventure.

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Whether that was fishing for King Salmon, sea kayaking, hiking, bear watching, whale watching, eagle watching, night zipping, unicycling, juggling,song writing, box fires, boot fires, tarp burritos, sea plane excursions, go karting, night clubbing, jail, hospitals, yuker, family dinners, celebrating birthdays, hole in the wall, singing on the roof, edward forty hands, binge drinking, peeing on sleeping coworkers, fighting or searching for submarine bases that summer provided more memories than most lives will ever produce. The irony of this is that I quit 10 days after arriving. I couldn’t me more grateful for forgetting that sporadic decision.

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Had it not been for my desperate search for an adrenaline rushing adventure Alaska wouldn’t have such a special place in my heart. Wouldn’t have had such an impact on my life. The friends & support I’ve received over the years from those amazing individuals would have never been apart of my world. Its really a unique moment when a stranger becomes a life long friend that you’ve only known for a couple of hours, but that’s standard operating procedure for seasonal life. You start out strangers and become life long friends in the span of a few months. No matter the miles, time or scenario your there for one another. Alaska showed me the life I had been searching for for over a decade, and allowed me to finally graduate from the University of Globetrotters with full honors. Since 2008 I have lived in 35 states 7 countries and have never been able to duplicate that summer. I’ve searched far & wide in some of the most iconic vacation towns in the world. I’ve kayaked the entire Mississippi River. Hiked both the Applachain & Pacific Crest Trails. Backpacked down to Brazil in time for World Cup. Worked the Winter Olympics in Vancouver. Arrived in Thailand in the middle of their civil war. Attended two presidential swearing in ceremonies. I’ve ski’d more days in one season than most will in a decade. I have worked, lived or visited just about every mountain town there is in the United States. North Carolina introduced me to kite surfing, and Hawaii keeps calling my name but I keep missing the call. 2008 was a magical summer that changed my life, vantage point, mentality & overall approach to the world. Someday when I least expect something special will knock 2008 ACA off the podium, but I am eternally grateful for that one extraordinary summer.

My intention for writing this isn’t to brag, gloat or belittle you. Its to show you that there is life out there that is entirely made up of genuine souls searching & seeking. Looking forward to the day they meet you. Impatiently waiting to plan an adventure of a lifetime with you. They’re not materialistic. They don’t care about your background. Bank accounts don’t matter, and status is irrelevant. You’ll be welcomed with open arms, and it doesn’t require anything more then desire and curiosity. AOWANDERS is here to help you plan your adventures, fund your travels, share my tales & ultimately help you live your dreams.