survivorreelsmagicwithin

[survivorreelsmagicwithin]

Episode 16 and 17- “I'm trying to go from the girl who lived to the girl who won okay”-Autumn

On... the wrong side of the vote again, which sucks but as I have said before, Lily was definitely one of my biggest competitions in the game!  I am SO SHOOK that I am sitting in the final four right now.  Not to sound all cocky but I feel like I have a little bit of a chance!   I feel like if I do make it I will get dragged by all of the jurors for playing a bit of a snake-y game but I think at the same time it has been a GOOD game.  I've withheld information and told information all at the right times to make it this far anyway.   If I want to make it to the final three I HAVE to win this immunity.  Seriously, everything is riding on this because obviously Autumn and Chips are going to continue working together and Juls would be a FOOL to make it go to a firemaking challenge to give me a chance to stay in.   I'm feeling VERY lonely right now without Lily to talk to but I'm going to push through and try to look on the bright side.  THIS is what I wanted, like I needed her to go so I could push my way to the end but I just wasn't ready for it to happen yet! So, when I play Survivor I get fourth place very often... maybe I can break that trend by winning this immunity.  FINGERS CROSSED!!  

2 hours later

I just wrote my ROP and I am so emotional right now.  I'm glad that I'm done and can just sleep and cry and not have to worry about any game related stuff until the challenge tomorrow.  I feel like it will be some kind of endurance-y thing so time to get in some sleep, a nap tomorrow and work my ass off to get myself into the final three!   I didn't realize how sad I was about Lily leaving until writing ROP, who knew this was going to hit me as bad as Dan and Owen going home did.   If I do make it to the end I am AWFUL at answering questions on the spot so I'm not looking forward to that.  I also can't handle getting dragged by the jury without like awkwardly laughing or crying so... if I do make it this will be fun.  

Wow. So the vote was definitely A LOT. Lily lied all day and had a plan with Ruthie (trying to bring in Juls) to vote Autumn. I wanted to vote for Lily pretty much all day and then she pitches to me that voting Autumn makes sense because it would improve my odds of winning if I go to the end since Autumn and I share a lot of credit in the game. Of course I know that that is a lot of bull since there is nothing but immunity to stop Ruthie and Lily from voting me the following round. Then I'm kind of... stuck!!! Whatever move I make for the vote does not benefit ME. I either give power to the Hufflepuffs by keeping the two intact to plan to eliminate me or I give power to Autumn to turn around at final tribal and say that I've been her goat this whole time. I told Autumn before the vote that she has nothing to fear from me flipping on her and let her know exactly what Lily told me. I know that probably makes me seem cringe but I am an ally! I have played all of merge WITH Autumn and I honestly feel that if either she or I make FTC and win that WE have won. I don't really care if I'm given the title or she is because we have worked the votes and the players to get results that we needed and have taken pretty much every curveball thrown at us in stride. We have made it to final four without any advantages to play and I guarantee that if Autumn does not win immunity that I am going to let her go to fire making.

I still can't believe it honestly. Like I can because Gryffindor is THAT house but whew chile the emotions. Saving me is the key to my heart so if Juls and Chips ever need anything, they know who to call

 https://drive.google.com/file/d/18ebdzI6N47tTspx31G1mSTLbaL1Pldud/view?usp=sharing

Can we talk about how bad my memory is? LOL.  Okay- I'm sure I can win the endurance and I have a cute idea that BETTER win the creativity one.  I'm just going to work on the puzzle as much as I can and HOPE that even with that bad memory score I can knock the rest of these things out of the park! I NEED THIS TO STAY IN!

10 hours later

I am so nervous about this challenge!  I NEED to win this.  I know I bombed the memory comp but I think I did pretty good on the creative part, I'm ROCKING this endurance challenge and I think I'm doing pretty good on the puzzle too.  I!  Have!  A!  Chance! If I end up not winning I'll be happy with myself for trying my hardest though.   I'm so tired, I set a bunch of alarms on my phone so I could sleep and wake up to post for the challenge and while I did get sleep the waking up and going back to sleep thing took a toll on me, haha!  

12 hours later

I am a GONER!!  I am happy for Autumn though- she won it fair and square.  I really don't have anything up my sleeve to try and stay except for maybe using the note power thing?  I don't know what good it would do.  I am both sad and happy at the same time.  Maybe one of them will have a revelation and decide they want to get Juls or Chips out before FTC but I think my time here is gone.  It has been fun and I can't wait to get a good nights sleep tonight, hehe. 

30 minutes later

Juls saying she has to think about things is key word for what I thought... I'm gone!  It is okay though and I really don't blame her.  She said some very sweet things to me though which means SO much but if I were in her position I'm not sure that I would take me either.   I'm not sure that I would win but I did vote wrong many times and I formed close relationships with a lot of the jury members.  It will be AMAZING if I stay but I've already kind of got it in my head that I'm going.   I have NO IDEA who I will vote for.  Autumn really brought it for that last challenge and I could really see her winning this whole thing- which is why I wanted her gone for a few rounds now!  Chips has also played a great game and the fact that he's gotten out of being voted out says a lot about him too.  As for Juls I also think that she played a great game.  Kind of a low key game and I'm sure she is going to get some questions like... "WHAT DID YOU DO???" but I think she played a great game, won the chess immunity and could also take this whole thing home.  

The immunity challenge was four parts! Woohoo? It was a lot! And if I"m being honest I don't know that I will ever again do a 24 hour challenge. I will probably just do it ONE TIME in the future. If I wanted to feel like I had a newborn again I would have another child. Autumn won immunity by the skin of her teeth (which is awesome because I was on the bottom end of third place) and so now I believe Ruthie is the final vote of the season. This will make it all Gryffindors going into the final tribal council. I don't know that Juls would vote me instead of Ruthie at this point, but if she does then I'm pretty sure we are going to enter into firemaking me versus Ruthie - since I'm pretty confident Ruthie will be voting me one last time before the season's voting rounds come to an end. It's exciting to probably be going into final tribal council and I'm going to do my best to talk myself up to the jury. I played the best game that I could play in the situation I was in at merge and I don't think it was necessarily a goat game - I just think that I am going in with a frontrunner in my duo partner as well as having done very little to differentiate myself from her to make myself shine. Going to have to dig in to past events and rounds to come up with something twistos twisty to stand out.

I don't have time to film a video rn now cause Akhmim boys are getting on my nerves lmao BUT yes I will give yall one more this weekend since I'm IMMUNE and I got time. I'm trying to go from the girl who lived to the girl who won okay

https://data.whicdn.com/images/338845071/original.gif

next day

Ok so this is pre-FTC lmao and I'm unsure whether to film anything else but THANK YOU to everyone who watched and or played. It has been both a pleasure and an honor to get to know you and entertain you. And special thanks to the hosts cause they really snapped and I hope they continue this series/ they really have my blessing  

https://drive.google.com/open?id=1JR09xJ2vN9fiL04exminiRV-6WDWXest

 Now drop the draft lmao I wanna know the tea

[survivorreelsmagicwithin]

Episode 15- “that’s the name of the game” -Lily

FINAL FIVE!!!   Okay, I think I would have rather had Autumn go this round but... Kevin DID need to go.  He, Autumn and Lily are HUGE threats and in all honesty I think that Chips and Juls are pretty big threats too.  I mean, they have both won an immunity anyway.  I can see anyone left winning the entire thing. Whatever immunity is I am going to work my ASS off for it.

2 minutes later

Also as soon as tribal was over I apologized to Chips but told him I knew Kevin was going to be the one going SJFLJF.  I feel like I also need to touch base with Autumn to let her know I knew what was going on but I don't want her to let it slip to Lily or anyone that I am trying to play all sides right now.   If Autumn wins immunity I think I'm going to TRY to talk people into a Lily vote... IDK, it is a risky move but I feel like it has to be done if I want to be serious about this thing and try to win.  

I feel like every time I come to write here I’m just like wow this is the most wild game I’ve played and I’m having so much fun. It still absolutely sucks to go to tribal. I hate lying. I hate the anxiety. But that’s the name of the game. I need to survive and try to make it out of this thing feeling proud with how I’ve played. I can’t believe we are at F5 and I have a decent shot of making it to the end. At this point, I’m not sure what my ideal F3 is. My main goal is to get there. Kevin really played this game socially, strategically, and physically in the challenges so it’s nice feeling like there is more of a level playing field. My heart wants to take ruthie with me to the end but ultimately I think we would split votes. If I go to the end with autumn and chips, I think autumn would likely get votes for her social and strategic game. She was able execute several last minute votes. Chips could get some votes on his ability to adapt to the game and survive so many tribals and votes. Juls is a fighter I can tell but our games weren’t as connected and she was seen as more chaotic. I think another option I have is potentially working with juls and Ruthie on this next votes to split up autumn and chips. I like that I have options but I don’t want those options to come back and bite me. I’m excited for this next immunity and hope I can pull off a win! Catch me tomorrow in this confessional writing about how I didn’t win.... but fingers are still crossed baby! Whew. Will I figure out what I’m doing? Maybe!???!!!?!!?

Okay, so I've found 50 items and I feel like there has to be AT LEAST 100.  I could be very wrong but I'm going to try my hardest to find as much as I possibly can.  I NEED A WIN!!!

9 hours later

UGHHH I didn't even get close to 100.  I'm scared that I'm not going to win but I have a little bit of hope!  I am SO NERVOUS.  I NEED THIS WIN if I want to make it to the end and possibly win.  I feel like I worked very hard for this one so we'll see. 

20 minutes later

I AM SO EXCITED!!! YAY I WON SOMETHING!!!  I'm am SHOCKED with how close everyones scores were and I literally found 'jewels' RIGHT before we were told to lock in.  I NEEDED this so bad, okay I feel like I at least accomplished a little thing and I HAVE MADE FINAL FOUR, WOO!!!   As for the vote...  I'm not sure what I'm doing, I still think Autumn NEEDS to go and I think Lily can help me get her out. Maybe.  We'll see!  I'm not going to stress about the vote tonight and just see what happens!  FINAL FOUR, YAY!!!! 

30 minutes later

I really think I am going to work with Lily this round and try to talk her into getting out Autumn.  I told her and Juls I was heading to bed but I'm hoping that maybe the three of us can work together to get Autumn out, but if Lily has a better suggestion I would be down to listen to it.   I'm interested to hear what Chips and Autumn will suggest because I feel like if I DID NOT win I would have been the one going home.  I am kind of wondering if they are going to try to go for Lily this round.  I have a lot of thinking to do about my end game.  I definitely think that Lily is my biggest competition right now but we have both kind of snaked people in the game and have played similarly so maybe it would be best to go together?  I'm not sure.   At this point I think that anyone is worthy of the win but I think I would personally vote for Lily to win against anyone left if I was a juror. 

Well....I got those nervous butterflies in my stomach. NOT in the good way. I guess this is what I get for playing the game I have. I've done what I could to try and stay out of the limelight and keep the focus off of me, but with Ruthie immune I'm nervous for the worst. Talked to Chips this morning and he said he was worried about going but I assured him he would be okay and that we would talk to Autumn about voting Juls. I talk to Ruthie she sounds like she wants to vote Autumn, I state how that would be smart to do now. Ruthie comes back and says that Juls wants to vote me out with Autumn and Chips. BIG EEP. I talk to Autumn she says she is down to vote Juls. Are Chips and Autumn playing me so good right in front of my face? I sure hope not! Can't say I'm not nervous for this one. If I go tonight, I'll be proud with the game I played but disappointed to be cut just short. I want to try and remind Autumn of what she said to me a few rounds back about keeping strong players that we want to fight with at the end. I hope that sways her to keep me around vs Juls who didn't put up her best effort at this last challenge. And if Chips is playing me rn like this DANNGGGGGGGGG. This is the most nervous I've been this season and I've been nervous this whole thing. haha Hoping I can continue my fight and convince others to keep me along for another round. Shout out to Ruthie having my back 100%. I don't honestly think I deserve it, but I love and stan the loyalty. Wish me luck poor, sweet confessional?

we are reaching the end of the game um.. shakes. i’ve literally lost pretty much ALL of my allies but i’m hoping that if no one is lying to me that i skate by to f4.. and depending on who wins final immunity.. f3. cause rn i think chips/autumn want a gryffindor final three which i am a-okay with because i genuinely think i could still have a shot at winning HHHH autumn is a kick ass player but i think i’ve really proven myself so i just really want this chance because i believe i’ve been playing such a good game. 

Me loving Lily right after Final 6: 

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1_J09-aQPeeGEEfoE2F7G9OlNEG4YrnW2/view?usp=sharing 

Also me in Final 5: 

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1FyTOlAIf_4w0RrEE9wXxjbNXsSWwpo7j/view?usp=sharing

Alright! The vote went successfully! No powers played!! And then a weird vote split?? The immunity was find as much as you can on the blog and then you can win if you find more than everyone else. I tried... AND LOST BY ONE! Anyway Ruthie is immune and the vote is for Lily this round I'm pretty sure. I think there's some discourse so far as whether it would be between her and Juls and then it's looking like Lily and Ruthie want to vote Autumn.. it's a whirlwind. If I'm being perfectly honest this should be the round I vote out Autumn because it would give me the best chance at winning the season. But also if I'm being honest I kind of don't mind if she wins? Anyway, I don't know entirely what I will do. I'm kind of on the fence at this point. Do I stick it out with my ally or turn on her and cut her in cold blood? I could almost maybe get away with blaming the vote on Juls but I don't think that's going to work out for me. 

[survivorreelsmagicwithin]

Episode 14-  “i hope this isn't the beginning of the end for me”-Kevin

HAHAHAHA UGH, I feel so bad right now but.... at least now I think I am GOOOOOD with everyone on this island and I can kind of figure out who I want to vote with next week.  Next I think Autumn should go because she is a big threat and I feel like maybe I can get Kevin and Juls to vote with me for her now that Joanna is out of the picture.   Also now that maybe I have earned Lily's trust again she will too.   I seriously do feel like such a villain right now, frick. 

10 minutes later

I STILL CAN'T BELIEVE I MADE IT TO FINAL 6!!   I'm really sorry Joanna, I just really needed to get myself in a good position with all these people left so I can kind of decide which way I want to take things next round.  Kevin and I are talking about maybe getting Lily to vote with us to get Chips or Autumn out.   I never really thought that Chips was much of a threat but with his immunity win he might be one. 

so Joanna just got blindsided, that's not fun, if you ever read this Joanna I love you and you're so good and you didn't deserve that. Basically ruthie backstabbed our alliance because she thought we were playing her, which I can understand to a point, the day was abnormally quiet, so if there was ever gonna be a round where she was blindsided it would be now. BUT WE WEREN'T !! like we were all genuine and honest with wanting chips out and it seemed like the easy vote but ruthie complicates everything.. AGAIN. I love her but she is kind of all over the place, i never know when to believe her and then she came into our chat with juls/me/her and came forward about it and was honest which was nice i guess. At this point I can't trust chips or autumn at all and i think they feel the same way as me, so i need to work my social game and make sure ruthie knows i TRUST HER, i also need lily to know i want to work with her going forward and that i've been trying to be HONEST, i even told her I was voting for chips and that was the only name i heard. And then we could have gone after autumn next round like SHE pitched to ME. nothing goes right when i'm immune, but i feel the need to keep winning even though it will grow the target on my back. being on the wrong side of votes is such a blessing in disguise, i can milk this and try to spin it like im completely out of the loop and boohoo thank goodness i won immunity, i think in a game this crazy the last thing people are worried about sitting next to in the end is someone who seems like they needed challenges to be here. I think Lily and Autumn are the biggest THINKERS in this game, i think they know what they're doing and why they do it and that's scary. Ruthie is an acter, no i didn't misspell that, she is just someone who DOES, i think moves are brought to her and she decides whether to do them or not, a middle man of sorts. I've played like her many times in the past and now i know why people were frustrated with me, it's a frustrating style of play to deal with if you're not the one doing it, because you can't ever really rely on anyone. Chips and Juls are breeds of their own (respectfully) Chips is a full on goat but he's a goat for autumn, not really anyone else, i think they both need to go home before the final 3 for my game to work out in the end. Juls is special, juls is a social player through and through she gets in your good graces and then she settles down there, makes herself at home, eats your food, and kinda just lives there. No one ever really wants juls out, would taking juls out be helpful in weakening people? absolutely, but people don't wanna do it. My thing with juls is I don't think she's as big of a thinker as other people (juls if you read this i love you to death) she's smart thats a given but when it comes to the game i think she resonates more with the style of gameplay as ruthie, but not as ruthless or are messily, she's kinda consistent the whole way through. I think I could sit next to juls and feel like i outplayed her at the end, but if i sat next to like her and ruthie i think i could outtalk them too. BUT IM GETTING AHEAD OF MYSELF, i think my gameplan going forward is to simply oversell my loyalty to to both ruthie/juls and ruthie/lily but specifically RUTHIE, i want her to feel like i feel like i need her, because i think she's less likely to flip on me if thats the case. I am trying to pitch the duo of autumn/chips as the biggest threat in the game rn and even proposed to ruthie we go to finals with lily to lessen the perception of me and juls being close. There's very little margin for error here but i have played my heart out and i think whatever happens from here on out i will be content with, i hope this isn't the beginning of the end for me but whatever happens happens. ok this is extraordinarily long for being 40 minutes into the final 6 but woo! I am glad i made it this far and all that i have accomplished, feeling like im writing my obituary but i wont just give up !!

Good thing my life doesn't depend on wizards chest i don't know what the fuck i'm doing, LOL

40 minutes later

I can't believe I'm staying up late to get this competition over with, LOL.  I still have no idea what I'm doing but I'm starting to get a little better sense of it?   I'm having long drawn out conversations with Lily, Kevin and Chips all one on one and not really about that game so that and my coke are keeping me awake, lol. I feel like Juls is mad at me and I need to reach one on one instead of just in our alliance chat but for now I'm just not going to worry with it. 

1 hour and 30 minutes later

I LOOK SO DUMB FOR LOSING THAT, LOL! I had no idea what I was doing but apparently when I took my last move Chips told me I could have gone to A1 and set myself up for the win.  UGH.   I am seriously so dumb and mad at myself for not winning that.  Juls is the Ron Weasley of Wizards Chess and I am... stupid, LOL. 

I GOT IMMUNITY BITCHES! *peace sign* but um.. hehe.. i don’t even know what to say! after enduring so much SHIT these past few round from losing my allies, no one talking to me, and the lying that occurs straight to my face. but i think i finally take breather and i’m so content.. i’ve never ever made it past 6th place so the fact that i’ve secured my spot in 5th makes me so happy!!! i’ve only played one survivor org before this so it makes me wanna cry with how proud of myself i am HBSBZN i think i could really pull this shit off.. maybe. i’m not getting my hopes up too soon.

The vote actually went through successfully with Ruthie, Lily, Autumn, and myself voting out Joanna. The other three votes fell on me - not surprising! The next immunity challenge was semi-live and it was Knight Moves so I made it my whole objective to make sure Kevin was eliminated. In a perfect world Juls would have also been eliminated... but we don't live in that world and Ruthie accidentally gave her the win for the challenge. This round will more or less decide if Kevin is the clear person to go on to win the season. If he gets voted out with no advantages played then it's anyone's game. If someone else (very probably either me or Autumn) gets voted out without an advantage he wins the game. If an advantage is played and Kevin stays then it's still probably his game to lose, but there's a little more wiggle room on my jury vote. Hoping everyone is wise enough to knock out the clear and obvious winner at this final 6. If they are not they are either playing for second or third.

I would just like to say that all flaming should not be taken personally as I constantly contradict myself from video to video lmao and the only person I haven't flamed at this point is Chips so https://drive.google.com/file/d/1Ct6kYHHfeBI3ngTJJWdpF6Bikn14qjzP/view?usp=sharing 

 But also I could get idoled out?? So enjoy the confessionals while you have em ya know? I'm booked and busy these quarantine days haha. Insecure is back, I'm playing a main, I need a full time job, the list goes on. So vote me or don't. Go to rocks over me or don't. Call my bluff or don't. None of it will hurt my feelings and that's on period https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sG_CW_FU724v92eAPu4Qa3L53LyNMFvN/view?usp=sharing

I feel like Lily really has something up her sleeve OR I'm going to somehow get blindsided tonight. Kevin made a group chat with he, Lily, Juls and I and all Lily said in it was 'hi' which makes me think something is up.  I just want to be in on the plan if there is some kind of a plan.   Kevin wants to do a 2-2-2 vote which I'm not sure is a great idea and I'm just worried that Lily cooked something up so that Chips and Autumn vote me out with her.  I think Kevin IS a bigger threat over me but it is hard to tell what other people think. I also asked Lily if Autumn does use an advantage should we go after  Kevin then and she didn't really answer?  I don't know, I have four messages right now so I'm going to see what I can gather.   I kind of asked again and she IGNORED THE QUESTION A SECOND TIME.  I smell something fishy going on right now..... I guess I'm scared that she ratted me out to Kevin but we'll see, lol.

25 minutes later

THIS is exactly how I feel anytime I end up getting voted out.  Flushed face, lack of conversations going on around me and just... general shadiness all around.  Like, you can FEEL when it is going to happen.  SOMETHING is definitely up. 

[survivorreelsmagicwithin]

Episode 13- “lines aren't drawn yet and this game isn't over”-Lily

I VOTED THE RIGHT WAY!! FOR ONCE.  IN.  MY.  LIFE!! And it really feels so great!  I feel really bad, Landen is a GREAT player and if he was in final three no matter who he was sitting next to I am pretty sure I would have voted for him.  The fan in me is so mad at myself right now and if this series has an All Stars season I will start a petition for Landen to be cast! Right now I am hoping that I can salvage my relationship with Lily but it feels great to have numbers on my side for once!  I was never super close to ANY of these people except for maybe Kevin but I think that we all work good together and that vote was easy peasy with zero drama! 

6 minutes later

ALSO, my favorite quote of the day today was from Chips, I am still cackling- Me: Telling Chips that I'm scared I'm going to vote wrong and that I haven't made my rounds bc I'm watching real Survivor, bla bla bla.... and I congratulate him again for winning immunity. Chips: I hope I vote right this round. Chips: Glad you can't vote me again HAHAHA I love how honest and to the point he is and how he isn't afraid to call me out, I am so dead, LOL.

BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIG OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOF. Just a big ole oof. wowza. Am I the biggest fool that there ever was??? YOU BETCHA. UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH LANDENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN WHY!? What a crazy game this is and as per usual blessed to still be playing but I'm in my lazy boy crying about Landen getting the boot. Played with that kid since day 1! Ultimate duo. Love you but why you gotta leave me hanging on a single autumn vote?????? The only good thing to come of this is now I'm a free agent. At least I made F7 my favorite number at least now I can go out with some dignity. I shot my shot and I got my best bud out of the game. Oop. So screw what I said at tribal council, lines aren't drawn yet and this game isn't over. 

2 hours later

Am I going to go absolutely nuts today? Yeah, probably. Ruthie is the only one online right now and I’m trying to make something happen. If I think about the dynamics going on right now it’s clear to me that autumn and chips are on the outs with Joanna, juls, Kevin, and Ruthie working together on the last vote. I can also tell that Kevin and Ruthie don’t want to vote for me so that at least gives me decent odds of making it through this vote. However they will most likely go for autumn as Ruthie has already suggested. This will most likely lead into me getting voted out around 5th if Kevin continues to win immunity challenges. I’m wondering if I can work with Kevin and Ruthie on this vote to get out Joanna I might be in a better position in the next coming cotes. That leaves a lot of big threats still in the game including the ruthie/Kevin duo. I know I can’t be too pushy with this group but I gotta try to make something happen otherwise what’s the point.

As far as tonight goes I am covering ALL my bases and both groups of Kevin, Juls and Joanna as well as Autumn, Lily and Chips think I am voting with them... LOL. This is honestly going to come back to bite me in the ass, I feel it coming!   It is nearing end game and I just NEED to vote smartly.  I feel like if I can gain Lily's trust and vote with them this round maybe I can get her to turn on Autumn and we can vote Autumn out next round.  I don't know who would be good to sit next to at the end right now, but with the position I'm in now I feel like Kevin will eventually try to get rid of me so that he could sit next to Juls and Joanna at the end and possibly win? UGH, I still don't know what I'm doing this round but I think that I am going to vote with Lily, Autumn and Chips as long as I keep a good read on them.  My only other concern is if I need to tell Kevin I'm doing this before the vote or not.  I'm just going to keep an open mind and figure it out when it gets to that.   I feel like such a villain and I don't know how I feel about that!! 

I almost won one :(

hello hello its me, so i won immunity this round in a TIEBREAKER !! thank god i took my time to think about that one, funnily enough my original guess was gonna be 39 just with the math i did in my head (the actual answer was 38) but i figured i wasn't giving people enough credit so i bumped it up to 41, i was even considering 43, but im glad i didn't whew. anyways enough about the challenge but i won a memory comp so i wanted to touch on that because thats exciting. Alrighty well today has been pretty tame as far as the vote goes, it's almost 30 minutes before tribal and the chat with myself joanna juls and ruthie all agreed chips was a good vote out, i spoke to lily who said she heard autumn's name but i didn't hear that but i do think voting autumn would be smart. My only concern is i think autumn is a good person for me to use as someone i can get votes on next round if i lose immunity, she has been involved in a LOT of stuff in this game she was involved in the owen flip, the ruthie flip even though she was idoled and then even the jules flip, like she's been in everyones ear but people dont really see it, but i think lily does. And so if i can keep autumn as someone to campaign against if i lose immunity i feel like i have a shot at staying next round without immunity. HOWEVER, BREAKING NEWS, juls just told me that chips told her that he thinks it might be her going home, saying that the people who think she is close to me are saying that. Which could be true, but it could also be a tactic to try and get juls to flip or maybe misplay an idol, theres so many things that are going on. In a perfect world chips goes home, then autumn and then idk what at 5. If juls DOES go i think potentially bounce back, i think i could work with ruthie and lily as og hufflepuffs and i dont think joanna would necessarily outright target me over ruthie or lily. But it's dangerous because right now joanna is in the middle and as she proved last round she is willing to do whatever she has to and i think she lied to landen REALLY well so im nervous. I'm considering getting lily and juls and just voting autumn and if they try anything it could go 3-3-1 or potentially if we are not being lied to it goes 3-2-2 which gets out my target for next round, and breaks my trust even more with joanna, who vocalized how upset she was that i have lied to her/not voted with her. I think my best bet is to stick to the chips vote and give off the energy like im riding this group til the wheels fall off. If juls does go home, then i have to step my game up but honestly i have been in the drivers seat long enough in this game, if people want to make moves and take the heat off of me and just keep giving me blows to the perception that im potentially controlling things or at the center of the things? idek if thats the perception people have or maybe im just delusion and overhyping myself. I think i can sell my position in the owen/dan/landen votes as being less impactful than i think it really was. But autumn is smart, as is lily, they could see through me, but i think the calmness of landen not being here is helping me kinda sell the whole "see all that stuff was cause of landen!! not little ol me!!!" and if i continue to vote with the people i voted with last round i could make f5 in this game in a neat spot. But that's if people continue to trust me, which they would have reason not to but i hope that they do. This is such a calm round yet things are still so so so complex and layered. this game is genuinely something unlike anything I have played. Wish me luck im gonna need it.

Alright. So last round was a mess with Landen leaving and Lily trying to blindside Autumn. Not really conducive to an alliance sticking together when one votes out another and the other makes the attempt. To try to pull stuff back together Autumn and I pulled in Lily since she was just swindled into voting incorrectly... and picked up Ruthie since she would be in the bottom of what could be viewed as a trio going into six. Kevin can easily take Juls and Joanna to the end and win if she does not flip. And he will. So this round is either a confirmation of Kevin's win or it's an unlikely group of four voting for one of the people who would be taken to the end as a no-vote getter. I say unlikely group because Ruthie has voted me twice, I have voted her once, I have forced rocks against Lily, and Lily has voted Autumn. Yay team!

yall better not try it this round or there will be blood at Final 6. Here's to hoping everybody does what they're supposed to but if they don't, you can't save em all https://drive.google.com/file/d/1arE1qIyJHouJHyXGrNtW_bS8oYZEpUWb/view?usp=sharing

[survivorreelsmagicwithin]

Episode 12- “i’m like a witch stirring my little pot and making my little potion. and the whole goal of the potion is to flip. this. game. on. it’s. head.”-Joanna

I am DONE with Landen.  DONE. I want to see what Lily has to say but I am TIRED of being out of the majority for all these votes and you know what??? Kevin asked if I wanted to flip to Landen because he SENSED this kind of thing was going on and I just couldn't believe that he would do it when HIS NAME IS FUCKING ON THE LINE.  WHY DO THIS? WHY?? I'm just sick.  I'm done being used, and now he is going to go and tell Chips everything I told he and Lily in private and I am just DONE. IF I HAD NOT PROMISED JULES SAFETY I WOULD HAVE VOTED WITH THEM!!  ALL THEY HAD TO DO WAS CLUE ME IN.  I am so done.  I don't know how Kevin and I are the liars here, I really don't. 

1 hour later

Me aligning with the other two people that were on the wrong side of the vote??? YES PLEASE.   I am so...  shook.  By whatever the heck Landen just pulled off.  I still don't understand it.  He said that he almost told me but that I promised Jules that I wouldn't vote for her so he wasn't going to tell me.   The way he described it was insane, he is going to mess around and win this entire game if he doesn't go home soon.  If CBS doesn't cast Landen for a legit season one day...   ANYWAY, I think Juls and Kevin are going to make an alliance chat for the three of us.  I told Kevin before heading to bed that I would put all my money on him or Juls if that helped one of them win immunity, which might cause me to go home this round but it would be really cute if we did somehow manage to get someone else to vote with us and us figure out SOMEONE to get out.   I can't believe there are eight people left and four of them are OG Hufflepuff.  

this game is so damn stressful but everything I do, I do for jury lmao so shoutout to Jacob, Max, Owen, and Dan. you want Jules out? you got it! all I ask is that you flame her just a little extra just for me thanks boys

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1TkrrzYlLb7ZfWcPgWVWiRmO7qzTX8-4F/view?usp=sharing

This gosh darn game. Really just so happy to be here at final 8 and can't believe 1/2 of those left are people I started this game with on Hufflepuff (rip Max <3). I genuinely hope one of us wins because I've never seen this happen before (not that I've really played that many games) but point still stands. Last nights vote went as I had hoped, Jules went home. I have the least amount of strategic rapport with her so it felt like the best move for me at the time. But I'm really again not super happy with how it went down. I didn't tell Kevin or Ruthie that I wanted to vote Jules. I was just nervous. I was pretty happy with any outcome that got someone out that wasn't OG HP; Jules, Joanna, Autumn,  Chips, Juls because ultimately I really do hope that hufflepuff does the incredible here and becomes final 4. BUT. I did feel solid about the alliance between Joanna, Autumn, Chips, Landen, and myself mostly because I still do trust Landen the most and I thought they were all honest it wanting to vote Jules out. Its really hard to tell with Joanna though, really an icon move honestly. What I do know is that this next vote is gonna be insane (as literally...every tribal in this game has been). Will there be another case of rocks? Time will tell. And I'd say now more than ever, immunity is going to be essential. 

After a crazy round last time, I got what I wanted by pushing the elimination of Jules. Jules is somebody who I liked a lot on a personal level, and was excited to get to know, but as the game progressed, it became clear that Jules, Juls, and Kevin, were never going to see me as a priority in the game at all, and would continue to use their alliance to their own advantage and keep me on the bottom, with each round getting harder and harder for myself and Lily to survive. Sure, Autumn and Chips had targeted me before, but working against them wasn't going to do anything - the others were never going to turn on them. But by exposing the way Kevin and Jules had been protecting me, Lily, and Ruthie, I could create a real systematic change in the way the game worked, even if it required working with the head honchos of the Lily vote. That is the sad truth that sometimes you just have to work with the enemy and that  was one of those times and it will continue to be one of those times! The round was very intense, first because everyone was ignoring me, and then because Chips leaked lots of information which resulted in a very hard round because I couldn't tell if Chips was trying to flip or not. Autumn was able to calm me down and I appreciate that from her a lot. But I'm also still annoyed that Chips leaked the information in the first place, because it made a very simple vote, MUCH harder to pull off, when at first we could've blindsided them into believing that it was a simple Ruthie vote with me and Lily trying to scramble for Chips but failing, while the real vote was Jules all along. It all worked out in the end though, so I guess we'll just pretend like those scrambles didn't happen. Teehee. That brings me to this round, I've had to push so hard for what I want every single round and fight to survive, and with so many spells looking like they're still in the game.. (The Gryff and Huff idols specifically) that could get me into VERY serious trouble soon. I do feel that I have a very good strategy in surrounding myself with Autumn and Lily, however. I am hoping that Kevin and Ruthie know that going after me or Lily puts them in a horrible position, strategywise - that it makes far more sense to target Autumn or even Joanna for them (since we are giving Chips immunity, which was not my preference, but again, the strategy this round is to not push anything). Autumn having 2 pocket votes, and a connection to Juls, and me and Lily on her side right now, makes her the far more dangerous opponent, and if they do want to use an idol, that would be the person to go for. Kevin is smart, so I'm expecting that he'll recognize this, and that makes me safe from their side. Of course I'll be safe from Autumn Chips and Joanna because they'll want to target Kevin and Ruthie after the mess we've made. By creating the sides of the war, I've given myself the freedom to securely pick the side I'm on, but leave open connections to another side that won't try to kill me as they try to put the game back in their favor, and I've ensured that the people on my side, in the majority, won't really have a reason to take me out. At least - not yet. Of course once the endgame comes around there's going to be talk of threats and winning at the Final 3 swirling around EVERYWHERE, where that fake "Goats VS Threats" narrative is going to come into play. I'm hoping at that stage in the game Autumn and Lily will be focused on eachother because let's be real - the jury doesn't like me that much! Anyone with a brain could see that I'm only winning at the end if I'm against Chips and Joanna... And even then it's going to be a very close one between me and Chips. So why not take me to the end :D Autumn might try to take out me and Lily both, but Lily would hopefully be her first priority, that way I could sneak into the Finals through use of immunities, which, I'm hoping by the next round, will STOP BEING SOCIAL CHALLENGES GOD DAMNIT. I may be an emotional, paranoid wreck, but it's hard not to be when every little thing has to go perfect for you to completely restructure the merge so you're sitting in the best spot when before you were in the worst. And that's how you make a marshmallow move, baby! 

Me trying to play dumb with Lily and Landen when I am in fact... dumb, LOL. I"m just trying to come across extra clueless like I'm someone they can just tell to vote HOWEVER and hopefully Juls, Kevin and I can find a crack somewhere. I really feel like they are trying to vote Kevin out this round. But I am constantly wrong so who knows. 

6 hours later

I am both laying low AND kissing Landen and Lily's vote.  I told them I wasn't going to be around much today and that I probably wouldn't make it to tribal... not sure if I'll get on or not for it but I'm trying to take the 'i don't care what we do, just tell me how to vote' way this round.   In a perfect world, I'm trying to work with Kevin, Juls and Kevin thinks that maybe Joanna will vote with us also.  There are eight people and there could potentially be rocks but I don't think Autumn would be down to go to rocks so...  maybe Landen or Lily will be the ones going home tonight.   I'm tired of being in the middle of it all so I'm just trying to lay low this week and do what other people tell me to.  If I feel like it is going to be me I'll scramble and just... come up with something extra.  

oh shit, i'm in the middle again

20 minutes later

i'm trying to make a move, but... is it right? i don't know

2 hours later

we might be going to rocks tonight and it was all my idea. if that ain’t a game winning move who knows what is. i’m like a witch stirring my little pot and making my little potion. and the whole goal of the potion is to flip. this. game. on. it’s. head. 

I HATE IT HERE! ever since jules left my life means nothing... and now i may be getting some votes tonight which do i really care about? no. but if landen doesn’t go i’m literally fucked in terms with trust in him which is why i need him to GOOOOO i’m so TIRED of the majority always getting what they want so i need that twink obliterated STAT. i love him dearly but i’m bitter and out for blood so what must be done.. must be done. rocks sounding pretty sexy tonight 

https://youtu.be/gwC4Kb8TRU0

So I guess I figured out the challenge faster than a lot of people? You just kind of have to hope you have a good alliance then invest all your money so no one else can snake it by investing all of theirs and your alliance invests in you. Luckily I'm in a group of 5... so that was easy. I put it in random.org really hoping that my name would turn up. IT DID! The random gods looking out. Anyway, I really want to vote Kevin for this tribal. Regardless of powers of whatever since I'm immune. He never talks game with me and then "forgets" to respond to me until after tribal councils. Autumn has previously communicated to me that she is close with him. Joanna doesn't want to vote him. The alliance is teetering between him and Ruthie and even maybe Juls. I don't know that Kevin will be going this tribal, but if he doesn't it will be interesting to see where the votes fall. Autumn communicated an end game goal with me that involves him leaving this round followed by Landen next one. If, for some reason, he doesn't go that puts a major wrench into things. Hopefully I can turn up the heat and start performing well at challenges moving forward so I don't have to worry about where votes are going... but honesty at this point I don't know.

I think I’m gonna die? and maybe it’s for the best? but also I don’t want to die?? does that make sense??? https://drive.google.com/file/d/1WEDXWIjiD57_NuFQGGjdtI4y8RIyD_t_/view?usp=drivesdk

[survivorreelsmagicwithin]

Episode 11- “we will see if anyone comes out of the saloon anytime soon”-Lily

I am literally so shook LOL, I don't know what just happened but...  Dan used his idol on me and I wish he would have stayed because comp queen... I am not.  I KNOW I am going to be the next to go if I don't win the next immunity challenge and I just don't know which of these fakes to put my trust in. I HONESTLY went back to Landen and Lily and intend to keep it that way because I don't know what kind of fuckery just happened with everyone else.   AND CHIPS IF YOU WROTE MY NAME DOWN AFTER WE PROMISED NOT TO WRITE EACH OTHERS NAMES....  jk LOL.  I went from like sobbing last week to laughing this week, I am a MESS. 

3 minutes later

TOUCHY SUBJECTS!! This is going to be my comp to win because I have a method with this one that NEVER fails me when I use it.  To do it I just have to be INSANELY honest and then just get into the head of everyone else.  I write everyone's name down that is still in the game and I figure out what each person would say for each question and then I tally it up!   LOOK at me being all cocky and confident about it, watch me lose now, LOL.

1 hour later

I really hope I win this challenge so I won't join Owen and Dan in the jury anytime soon.  This one is another one that I feel like Jules will do really good on, so there is that.  She, Landen and Lily are the ONLY ones that have talked to me after tribal.   Also did I mentioned I left the alliance chat I made with Landen and Lily then made a new one, LOL.  I promise I'm only this crazy when I play Survivor, I have no chill, I'm either dead and float to the end or I'm chaotic and jump from person to person and burn bridges and play BADLY like a crazy person.

when two idols get played and you accidentally send out a frenemy lmaaaaoo ily Dan

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uOcx0U-XVpA  

ok now on to the show

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1j3uV5Zc49fbFH4xLK-L0JQX82xsiA1dq/view?usp=sharing

dear diary, what the FUCK! i disassociate for one (1) day and everything goes bonkers.. all i can say is that i'm glad landen trusts me so much because whew.. what a messy man. but i love everything about him.. CFHGVJBKN no but for realsies this vote was CRAZY. but one of the biggest threats in this game.. at least to me just got out SOOO. i am thriving. i honestly think i'm genuinely in a really good position in this game because voting for ruthie last round secures my trust with so many people in this game.. aka autumn, lily AND while landen already trusts me so much <3 im even in more good graces with him by keeping in someone so close to him even though im still hmmm. on how close him and lily are. it's scary but.. i know he holds me dearly to him too so boom? UM! i don't know. working with jules and kevin is reassuring too.. chips and i are tight always.. the only people i don't talk to are joanna and ruthie but i don't think that will affect me in an matter. so. smiles.

HA!!! I may have had the most OTT confessionals ever last round but look who gets the last laugh?? LANDEN GETS THE LAST LAUGH! Because I was RIGHT. I knew that something was going on and something mysterious was being planned, I was utterly confused as to why this shit was happening around me, and I knew these people were off. I said They are PLAYING ME and why do I not know what's going on, there's something shady happening... And yes there was. I have to thank Kevin for making the dumbest move he could possibly make, which is to tell me and Lily. Sorry Kevin but you fucked me over twice and I'm not good with that, I'm not okay with his double dealing anymore! :) He was playing the middle and he got caught and If I want to make sure that Lily and myself continue to get through votes... That's the card I have to play. Last night I was working overtime as hard as possible to convince Chips and Autumn that they need to split the votes onto Ruthie and Dan, and to do that I was throwing Ruthie and Kevin under the bus. Oooops! Then they made it super easy by telling me the vote was on Lily which gave me the ammunition to flip things on Ruthie. Kevin might think it was just for that round, but I'm so glad, because this vote finally put me in a position of a tiny bit of power, I think. I'm still not like, RUNNING things, but I got an alliance of 5 and I think we really do have motivation to stick together, at least for now, and take Kevin and Ruthie OUT of this game. If I can just do that, that sets me up really well for the final stages of this game. I have to take out the double agents, get rid of the double dealing, set up this vote CLEAR, because I don't have an idol for protection anymore. Speaking of which... Yes I guess you could consider that a waste, but it wasn't like Lily got NO votes. I knew she would be getting 2 for sure, and I only knew for sure that Dan was getting 1. I was not going to risk Lily's life on the fluke possibility that there would be 2 or 3 Dan votes or that people would revote out Dan over Lily. No way. Lily is not only a huge shield for me in this game because of her social game, connections, and strategic prowess (she'd be more threatening than me in any FTC i think which makes people want to go for her instead of me), but she's someone who's ALWAYS going to have my back in this game. That is extremely powerful, I don't know if most people realize how powerful it is for someone to always have your back and be giving you information, that kind of relationship is necessary in Survivor and it always gives a type of power that could help me go on to win this game. And honestly, the more people think I'm playing FOR lily and that they shouldn't respect my game bc a lot of it is in the name of helping her and i BOTH get through things, they're wrong, but the better they think that bc that just helps make me seem a little less threatening and a little more like the ideal Buddy to take into Final Tribal Council! Where I hopefully have the story and the moves to wreck any opponent sans Autumn, Jules, Kevin, maaaaybe juls who all obviously cannot be allowed to make it there. :P I feel MUCH better about my spot in the game now. MARSHMALLOW MOVES BABY

INCH RESTING that only Landen, Lily and Jules have talked to me one on one since last night.  They are the ones that I was most wary of last round but I rely a lot on the of the social aspect of this game and if these people are too scared to talk to me after voting for me I'm not going to feel bad if I vote for them, haha.   I really have a good feeling about this challenge and I am once again praying to the survivor gods that I manage to pull out a win.  I NEED this.

I hate touchy subjects, I have never won it. Also last vote was a mess, two idols were played and that is insane. I was added really late to this new alliance chat and like okay cool, but I know I'm on the bottom of that alliance and they are trying to tell me that kevin is a snake but i trust kevin and like i can't go against that alliance because they are majority and tbh i'm not 100% sure who is all IN that alliance, they just told me to vote ruthie and i did and then she didn't even go home. i have voted for ruthie twice now and ruthie has gone home zero times, i'm worried she is going to come for me, but i've just been trying to vote with majority my guys

The anxiety I feel before immunity results is UNREAL in this game, haha. I have a really strong feeling that I won this one... and I am usually wrong when I start thinking that but I just HOPE that I did, I need this to squeak by.   I'm not really sure what I am going to do going forward, I feel like if I win this round I can either a) Cause a lot of ruckus and spill everyones tea when they finally decide to talk game with me or b) Have complete loyalty to Landen and Lily and just do whatever the heck they want to do to show that I AM loyal. I swear, every time I see I have a new Skype notification I refresh the blog to see if it is the results... and no luck.  Yet. Okay the people in the Atomic VL really need to stop so I will stop getting notifications, LOL. HARDLY ANYONE talks in this game right before results so I just have to deal with my anxiety over the results right here in my confessional. I am also searching and I'm mad at myself for remembering to search so late bc I doubt there will be time for me to look right before tribal tomorrow. I think?? That I might be onto something.  At the three broomsticks you can ask for drinks but there was an option to get a room and I'm HOPING that if I do that I will get one of those passes where I get to skedaddle before tribal.  I mean, it makes sense to me but it is probably going to be NOTHING. And it was nothing and I also DID NOT win immunity, grrr.  LOL.  I was actually way off and I can't wait to see what everyone said for everything. OKAY at least I got the one about me being the biggest liar right.

I'm not sure if i'm making moves or if my seeds are planting... but autumn has more social ties in this game than i do right now... and landen is playing a fantastic game from what i can tell. that's dangerous to keep around. i think he has a real shot at winning. and i don't want to be a goat. but every time i have had an agenda i have fought for it, just since merge hit, everyone who has been targeted i didn't care if they went. no agenda, no feisty joanna. but i'm creating an agenda... and i think landen might be my target... sorry b, just i want me to win this thing more than i want you to but... i also think that kevin is doing wonderfully. if i have any chance at this thing, which maybe i don't, landen and kevin both need to go.

I am fine with every touchy subjects answer I got... for the MOST part. Wouldn't bring home to your family? That's fine, I'm loud, aggressive, in your face with my opinions, boldly passionate, etc etc. They had to choose someone and I totally understand why they would pick me for that. Thinks he's running the game, I mean, I think it's obvious I DON'T think that, by how paranoid and messy I was scrambling the last couple votes, but I also know I come off as very pretentious and arrogant with having information, and have been on the right side of every vote, so I understand that people would put that about me. Loudest, DUH! Host favorite and juiciest confessionals I DEFINITELY don't agree with lol, I can be very boring and rambly, and I know yall dont like me TOO much. But Biggest villain... BIGGEST VILLAIN?!?! ARE YOU FOR REAL? ARE YOU FOR REAL, GIRL, ARE WE FOR REAL?? SOMEONE LIED TO HER SEVERAL TIMES. WHERE was the villainous behavior. WHERE WAS IT?!?!? I am one of the ONLY people in this game who has sold almost NOBODY out and who has almost NEVER lied. I sold ONE person out, and that was Ruthie. Who, might I remind you, BETRAYED HUFFLEPUFF before I did that, and NEVER established a 1-on-1 alliance with me, EVER, or even a smaller alliance with me. So it was hardly even a betrayal, especially as I was fighting to SURVIVE sdkfdskf. I played an IDOL for my closest ally, I spiraled as hard as possible to change the votes for every ally who was in serious danger, and I consistently did everything I can to do the right thing in this game instead of being a cutthroat mastermind like SOME PEOPLE (Jules, Kevin, im looking at you assholes!) AND SOMEHOW IM THE VILLAIN!??! I just... LOL. Girl where? Where am I the villain of the season? I'm definitely no OTTP hero, that's Lily, but as her designated sidekick I should at least be MORM! I mean, come on! As far as Kevin winning immunity and a bunch of other good superlatives, sigh. It's very questionable and makes me sketched the hell out. I wanna push on Jules but I feel like I'm gonna have to just push on Ruthie again, and I'm pretty sure that now that I'm without the idol I'll be going home bc of the stunt I pulled last time, soooo... Yeeeah.  That's that. I'll definitely push what I can tmrw tho, but for the most part I'm just gonna focus on school and my new cat collecting game, the game has been rly cute though so far and hopefully I find some way to stay.

look at me... number crunching like i can do math

I'm pretty sure that if Dan knew I just told Landen and Lily about the power he sent me- the anonymous note thing- he would break into hogwarts to yell at me.  I told them merely to establish a trust with them again because staying tight with them may be my only shot to actually make it to the end.

I'm so furious Kevin won immunity, because I had the perfect shot to go for him. I'm so angry. I'm so UPSET. I'm like.... WHEW i'm mad. It's so exhausting feeling like you're on the bottom every, single, round, no matter what happens, no matter how much you do to prove your loyalty and try to find an in with people, all it does is continually push you down even worse. I get ignored all day then I get called pushy and paranoid for asking why it's happening and trying to come up with a plan, then to make it worse I get labelled as "Villain of the Season". Like.... wtf? I guess I'm a villain for daring to try and survive and protect Lily, that makes me soooo evil and such a big bad, I guess I'm a villain for selling out Ruthie who never ever made an alliance with me and turned on me first, I guess I'm a villain for turning on Kevin after he consistently lies to me all day and plays the middle just to put me on the bottom, like, that's not a real ally. A real ally does whatever they can to do what is in the best interest of themselves AND their ally. They consider what's good for eachother. Kevin and others have proven to me at basically every single turn that they just consider me an extra vote, and, let's make this clear, an extra vote they don't even like. They use me because they know I'm a loyal player, and when they backstab me they get angry that I retaliate and do what I can to further my own position. It's just like extremely mind boggling and these are the type of mind games that wear me out so much because this game just psychologically is like brutal. It wears me down a lot and I'm just trying to keep a clear head about all this and find some way to stay afloat in the game and keep bearing a smile but it's honestly really really hard and at this point I don't know how much energy I have left to keep giving every tribal 150% at the last 30 minutes just to barely survive. Especially without an idol, like i'm just.. sigh. It's a lot but I'm going to keep giving it everything i have, because if there's one thing I don't know how to do, it's give up or lay down, even when all signs point to just settling and being quiet. It's not in my blood and I gotta play this game like me even if it makes me lose. A win is not worth compromising myself for, I'll never feel good about a victory that I feel like I abandoned myself to earn. 

And here we are at a stand still again. I feel like I’m in one of those old westerns but I’m out there with my gun in my holster ready to go and everybody else is at the saloon. Tumbleweeds go by and I’m like hello? Anybody there? Anyway... Landen is losing it. I’m here trying to keep hope and keeping my fingers crossed that my chills vibes get through on this holiday. So the past two tribals, despite being some of the most stressful of my whole life, have gone my way somehow. And I don’t think I’m appearing as too big of a threat at this point but what am I kidding I got votes last time. I have two alliances going which is more than I usually have. I continue to have the desire to stay hufflepuff strong despite voting for ruthie on the last vote. I also have an alliance with landen, Joanna, autumn, and chips. It’s an interesting group to say the least and I can’t say I fully trust the group. Autumn came forward as voting for dan at the last one and while I appreciate the honesty it does continue to make me weary of Autumn. I also think Dan was the one to start a vote on me and he may have been getting some traction on it but it fizzled. I hope that someone else doesn’t start to catch on to how suave I am and vote me out. I’d like to at least make it to my lucky 7 spot at this point!   This vote I think the best outcome would be Jules going. I have the least amount of strategic conversation with her so that would be ideal at this point. If it’s ruthie...I don’t want to vote her but I can’t risk getting myself voted out defending her. Shout out to you Ruthie. Best of luck. And we will see if anyone comes out of the saloon anytime soon...

can't believe the entire old hufflepuff tribe (minus Max) is back in an alliance together again.  I can't trust any of them as far as I can throw them but I love it. In other news, someone started a rumor that Chips told me to vote for Jules?? and he DID NOT.  But he is also not talking to me right now anymore.  I don't want to vote Jules, I am NOT voting Jules.  Jules also said she is not voting me but idk that I can trust it or not.  NO ONE is talking game right now besides me, Kevin, Lily and Landen.  Chips was talking to me earlier and so were Juls and Jules but none of them really knew a name and this is just a MESS.   I'm just trying not to get into any drama because I'm already branded as the biggest liar on the tribe when there are some people around here that have lied A LOT more than I have!! US TALKING GAME AND LILY RANDOMLY POPPING IN AFTER BEING MIA FOR AWHILE IN WITH- HAHAHAHAH okay edited, I cannot say what she said but I AM DEAD.. it includes the party emoji. I AM DEAD LOL, oh my god. I can't stop laughing. ANYWAY. So, Autumn says that the vote was Jules and now it is Chips??  SO BOTH SIDES ARE VOTING THE SAME? I'm so shook right now but this is good news!  I feel bad because Chips and I DID have a really good conversation today but if he was the one that just stirred all this shit up he needs to go.  I need a moment of peace! 

well. people be lyin to me. so. anyways. im tired. THESE PPL BE DOIN!!!!! THE MOST!!!!

i’m betraying the alliance i came into merge with while trying to keep it together. how does one convince someone to vote with them while pretending they don’t know anything? 

TOO MUCH INFO TOO LITTLE TIME ILL DO ANOTHER ONE AFTER TRIBAL

Tribal has been wild this round. Kevin won the challenge so he's immune. The new alliance I'm in wants to vote Jules because they are a powerhouse in all three categories - social, strategic, and challenges. Anyway, I told Jules I would tell them if I ever heard their name. I wanted to stick to that so I told them. I guess that was a mistake because they asked who from and I was already told they were working closely with Kevin so I just said Kevin. And then really shook them and I think they were shocked because Kevin is their final 2 (most likely) - anyway I didn't know what to say when they asked "From him?" because he never talks game with me. EVER. Luckily I got busy with life so I didn't have to respond... when I get back to my computer though apparently Jules has started asking why their name is being said to Landen and Lily and a conversation that I have had with Ruthie makes them suspicious that I am also telling Ruthie so the "loose lips sink ships" comes into play. Anyway, I definitely didn't actually say anything to Ruthie at all so I put that fire out. Then I try to tiptoe around the fact that I told Jules and Landen comes to the conclusion that Ruthie MUST be close with them if Jules knows because Juls might have talked to Ruthie about the vote. In the meantime our alliance comes up with a plan to throw me under the bus to Jules as well as for me to do the opposite to either Ruthie or Landen. For fear of an idol. All this drama happens and then I have to tell Jules that Kevin didn't say it and that someone else told me that Kevin had said it and they ask who... and then follow it up by telling me that Landen has been throwing me under the bus saying I'm lying and that they need to vote me. I guess our plan has started. I let Jules know that it was Landen who wanted to vote them. And then Jules comes to the conclusion that Landen is the common factor in these stories and asks if I want to vote for him. I agree because he has been trying to have me murdered and voted out all while at the same time planning to vote for Jules anyway. This plan is so eccentric and weird and nothing like I have ever done on Survivor. I felt so bad when I didn't tell Jules that they were being targeted for the vote but did not want to open this can of worms. Kind of hoping I get blindsided so I don't have to live with the guilt. But then also sort of hoping it works just because it is such a cool and fun thing we have done.

[survivorreelsmagicwithin]

Episode 10- “My only purpose in this game now is to serve my ever loving lord and savior, Ruthie”-Dan

I am crying for Owen leaving.  I don't know WHO did it, I can't math and this really fucking hurts my heart I don't know who was lying about it. 

12 minutes later

I've made a zillion confessionals and the fact that lily and landen went behind my back and freaking orchestrated the entire owen vote REALLY makes me mad.  things I told them in confidence that they have probably shared with EVERYONE that is left it just really makes me EXTREMELY mad. I've got to put my game face on but I am really disappointed in all of them. Like if they would have come to me and said, lets get owen!  I WOULD have thought about it because I've said all along that they are the ones I trust the most and I'm just SO livid right now.  I have a slew of messages from Lily and like THE ONE PERSON HERE I THOUGHT I COULD TRUST GOES AND DOES THIS TO ME. Okay I'm breathing but I still haven't replied to anyone I tried  to post something witty in the house chat LOL. like abby lee miller says... SAVE YOUR TEARS FOR THE PILLOW!  I'm going to get my game face on and try to see... if I'm in good with anyone at all I don't even know.   The competitor in me knows that Owen NEEDED to go if I want to win but this was all SHADY AS FUCK.  I NEVER CURSE AND I HAVE CURSED MORE IN THESE THINGS TODAY THAN I HAVE IN A MONTH. 

WHEW. BIG WHEW. That was the most wild day of my life but I’m really proud with how I handled myself and took charge of my game. I didn’t like how things were going ruthie or landen. I crawled and scratched all day talking to almost everyone. I start the day with Owen and somehow through all this it happened. I guess that’s why you don’t settle on a vote! Landen and I were so close to settling. I was also close to voting chips. I literally changed my vote three times. Joanna then chips then Owen. I’m happy I’m making moves and finding my own but I am nervous with how this will end. Dan is PISSED. I didn’t mean for him to play his advantage but in the end I’m glad he did. I wondering how the rest of this game is going to go but I’m hoping that those who really say they have my back have my back. Owen added me to an alliance with me ruthie and dan because he trusted us most. I thought that was odd since Owen hadn’t talked game to me privately since I had voted him at the last tribal. In the end I think he would have tried to work with me but I think Owen and dan if they make it to the end they have a high probability of winning. I don’t know if I can trust to work with Dan at this point. I think he is too mad and will play me later on which I get. This game definitely isn’t getting any easier!

oh y'all are in for a treat- we doing video confessionals ALL merge kids! Welcome to the 3 part saga of the Final 11 Vote, where I get cut off by my birth control alarm, the tribal council call, and some bullshit all in the span of 30 minutes whew

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1ShZLFvoQ96aSRUHBUMzuoNkxB93eph60/view?usp=sharing 

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1SBAw--aQAtzQCtUwSP9EaCeMRTymJ8P3/view?usp=sharing

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1Vyag5Bijk1-L7NyAumeYDk7z3z_Q2p6m/view?usp=sharing

Sorry for ugly crying y'all LSDJFLDSJF.  Also, this happened while the video was uploading but Dan ALSO gave me some other kind of advantage that I don't really understand I'm... confused. Anyway, I hope that things get better soon so that he and I can take on the game together. <3 https://youtu.be/745M9EmNtT4

Well well well! You know it wasn't exactly the prettiest path there, but at the end of the day, I got what I wanted with the vote. I have to admit my feelings are just a little hurt, because at the beginning of the round, when I pushed to vote out Owen with Autumn, Kevin, Juls, Jules, and Lily, Autumn was so irritated with me that she began to push the target onto me and blow things way out of proportion when I was literally just pushing a simple idea. Anyway I then had to fight with everything I have to make sure the votes were on Ruthie instead, I had to have Juls and Jules go up to bat for me, while also pitching my case to Owen and Kevin and getting all the votes back on Ruthie. I did all that work and then 5 minutes before the Deadline Kevin says one thing to Jules and that's enough to entirely shift the vote and get Owen eliminated? Like it doesn't matter when Ravenclaw is clearly coming for me (Fuck off Dan), I'm expendable, but now that they're coming for you, oh, Hell will be rained down upon us. Yeah that's bullshit, but it's fine. Unlike some people, I'm not going to let my emotions impact my game and go on a targeting tirade against Autumn or something even though she really rubbed me the wrong way today and lost a lot of my trust and faith in her. That's her bad for having a messy social game, when she could've kept me as a close ally who was blindly ready to follow and trust her and she fucked that up, so that's her mistake. Not my loss, I still have half the game wanting to protect me yo. The jury as it stands right now does not look too hot in regards to my winning chances.. :P Max would definitely vote for me I think, but Jacob C and Owen.. yeah probably not. I could see Owen voting for me but I think he's understandably pissed that he sacrificed a lot for me and it didn't go well for him. But again that was his mistake, I told him to keep the vote on Ruthie and that we shouldn't be trying to do any secondary plans, and he didn't listen to me. Everyone keeps not listening to me and it's very frustrating bc I keep being right about everything, but oh well. Sometimes that's just the way it rolls in Survivor and you have to accept it until you have the power to get what you want done DONE, that's the patience and hard work of Hufflepuff speaking luv. TENACITY! .....Now, Dan reacted to this vote terribly. Honestly I would pop off and write a bunch of essays, but let's just say Dan has always been really condescending and just dismissive. He has an incessant need for control in the game and he literally like.. BLEW THE FUCK UP because of one simple vote??? So useless, and so gaslighty. Disrespectful to act like he's gonna quit, too. Just quit then. But whatever, Dan's tantrum is just adding more of a target on his back and taking all the target AWAY from me so I'm more than okay with that!! :D I think there will also be another target on Ruthie yet again because people will still be nervous about Hufflepuff numbers. Possibly a small target on Joanna for her inactivity and just general bad position in the game (which sucks to say given what's going on in her personal life, but that's just how it goes sometimes). At this rate though what I really need to focus on is jury management and improving some of my rockier relationships, because I think after this vote, I have survival down pat for a few rounds, which is great since I also have the idol to use for later when it comes down to it. We'll see what all happens though, this has been me reporting on the mess... What a time!

My PM's are EXTREMELY dry and it really irritates me.  Right now I feel like the entire tribe (minus Dan) are against me.  Landen and I talk every morning and it just sucks.  I did a lot of thinking last night and I've come to the conclusion that Landen is running this game and he is TIGHT with everyone.  I think that I can play off that I still want to work with him and Lily but I have to figure out a way to get Jules or Juls out to weaken him.   Owen gave me a lot of information yesterday that Juls and Jules were pushing for me to go and that Dan and Autumn wanted Landen to go.  I'm pretty sure Dan will vote however I ask him to and if Autumn and I could form some kind of bond... I need to see where Lily and I are because maybe she, Autumn and I... and maybe Kevin and someone else? could work together to bring someone out of the group of Landen/Juls/Jules down, and Dan would definitely vote with us. I ultimately feel like my name is mud right now, so this round I am going to just sit back and do more listening than talking. 

It has been rough in real life for me these past couple of days. In game drama doesn't make it better. Apparently Owen wanted to vote me out and then messaged me that he was worried his name was being thrown around. I, who was in the middle of having a mental breakdown, did not respond. It's funny when all I want to do is vote with the majority I don't vote with majority. I'm really frustrated with real life right now, I don't want this game to be frustrating too. I'm still going to try my best because I want to win this game, I just wish it was easier to do so.

OF COURSE.... I tie... with the person that wants me to go home, LOL. We were talking right before results though and have maybe cleared the air.

Now here comes my favorite part of the game where we all wait until tomorrow with like 4 hours left to the deadline to scramble and agree on the vote when if people just stopped being fake and safe and all angsty about "PARANOID BULLSHIT" then we could all easily come to the conclusion that we are splitting the votes on Dan and Joanna now instead of like 10 years from now. Pls. i don't see anyone other than the 2 of them and ruthie getting votes here, and if it happens this game is cancelled.

Chips is literally the only one talking to me right now and it is SO awkward, LOL. UH.  lJFJSLF i shouldn't feel so guilty HE WAS VOTING FOR ME!!!!  I AM NOT THE ONLY BAD GUY IN THAT EQUATION. 

My only purpose in this game now is to serve my ever loving lord and savior, Ruthie

It's so quiet today! I'm trying to figure out why... Did Lily tell people about my idol in a bid to change the vote yesterday and now this is a plan to flush my idol now because they couldn't get rid of it last time? Is Lily completely loyal to me and Im wrong for even SUSPECTING that and I'm just super paranoid and really people are just busy/don't wanna come online rn? That doesn't seem to be the case... I've definitely lost before because I don't trust my gut about the day being quiet as hell. *I GLANCE AT YOU THREE HOSTS VOTING ME OUT IN THE QUIETEST DAY EVER.*  I feel like I need to do more to survive but I've been put in an awkward position because I was told last round that I am 'too much' and should stop fighting to survive bc people view me as paranoid and pushy. So I am trying to exercise some self-restraint, but also I don't want to wait too long before I have a chance to genuinely figure out what the hell is going on and change this vote. I feel like there are some likely scenarios. 1 - People know about my idol, and they're trying to flush it by spooking me out when the vote is really on Dan 2 - People are trying to vote Dan but are very worried about him having 2 idols, so they're maybe putting some votes on me as well? 3 - People are trying to vote out Ruthie and don't want to tell me and Lily because of how they think that we're the ones who worked overtime to keep Ruthie safe and they're very concerned about Hufflepuff numbers 4 - People are straight up trying to vote me after Ruthie made up with Jules last night (maybe Jules revealed that I sold Ruthie out?) I am getting really ominous vibes from just the whole layout of this vote right now. I don't like it at all and I feel like something mysterious is going on, like people definitely did something weird that I don't understand and I'm just trying to put my mind 2 steps ahead of everyone else and I feel like I'm falling backwards. I have no idea what's going on tonight but I know it's not as simple as people are telling me like people are not being honest with me and that's pissing me off because I've been nothing but honest and kind with these people, consistently. :/  WHY. ARE. THERE. MIND GAMES. RN!

Honestly, this is a make or break part of the game for me. I had my tantrum and now, I'm trusting everyone to not vote me out tonight??? Autumn did some leg work to try and get the vote on L*ly.  So I'm hoping that happens. I could play my idol tonight and throw a vote on like Kevin or Landen or somebody just in case there is another idol play? I'm not sure. All I know is that if I play my idol, I'll be here for another round for sure, but if I don't, I could be the dumbest player ever!

I... don't know how I keep getting myself into these messes, haha. I don't know what I'm going to go, here I am thinking everything is going to be all fine and dandy and kind of chill and KEVIN HEARD THAT I THREW LILY'S NAME OUT... which I didn't, Dan mentioned Autumn would vote her and I told Autumn that I didn't really trust Lily and Landen and she just kind of went with it but then... if it got back to Kevin I kind of think that it was my idea I think that I'm screwed. I just feel like there is this huge wedge between the two people that I was the closest to in this game and me now and I don't know how to fix it so I'm just going to vote one of them out??? I...  have been so messy this season, lol. I gave Dan back his idol but he says he is going to send it back to me if he decides not to use it... we are playing idol tag. 

I am a damn TRAINWRECK this round!! I tried so hard to hold myself back from talking to people a ton and getting worked up and into a frenzy about this vote but here I am, now trying to hit up like seven different people. I've never felt so confused about a vote before, it's so weirdly quiet and I have no idea why and nothing makes sense and what the HELL is going on???? Like I'm... I'm straight up lost and confuzzled. At this rate I'm just gonna drop that idol like it's hot regardless because I have no idea wtf is happening and it's better to waste it than to go out with it in my pocket, right? ...I think???? Or maybe stuff will come out and I'll feel more confident later and I won't play it, I dunno! All I know is whatever's going around right now doesn't match the vibes I normally get from these people ever and it's FREAKIN me the hell out. 

So pretty opposite of the last vote. No one is talking. No one is sharing ideas. No names. Except dan and it’s 8:30? I think it’s gonna be a split vote tonight because who knows if dan is really gonna play his idol. The only person at this point that I trust 95% is Landen. He has told me the truth about what he thinks genuinely and told me he has the merge idol. I feel a little sketched out by Kevin and Ruthie from last round but I do think they would at least be honest and tell me if I was going to be the one voted out if they knew. I’m trying hard to work with autumn but she’s a tough cookie! She has something up her sleeve and I’m not sure of what just yet. All I know is it’s hard to trust anybody out here but is that really a surprise?

tell me why this game is still stressful...when i have immunity and PURPOSELY aint trying to do anything besides vibe...WHY AM I STILL STRESSED!!!!!!!!

Hm.. found out in the last ten minutes before votes were due that a bunch of people were voting me. Unsurprising (I guess at this point...) it is led by Owen someone who is supposed to be in a alliance with me. Choices? Anyway, Jules let me know that I was being thrown under the bus and asked if I would be down to flip on Owen. Yeah. Sure. If he wants to vote me I'll vote him?? Looks like something similar is happening this round. It might not be be me but why let myself think so. Dan is the "obvious vote" because he decided he's not aligned with anyone and outed that he had an idol but the group wants to turn on Lily this round. I dunno I guess I'd be cool voting Lily? She hasn't really worked solidly with me so far and I need to get into smaller numbers before I feel safe making any "bold" plays since a lot of these people have been wishy-washy up to this point.

HAHAHAHAHA I’m at work !!! AGAIN!!!! anyways people wanna do lily but that’s sketchy bc dans idol needs flushing I think autumn is working with dan I just told landen and lily who weren’t supposed to know about the vote bc I don’t want lily to go I hoped one of them had an idol but they don’t so well. Here we are. I might’ve screwed myself over here but I think I was screwed either way tbh just with how the rounds would’ve played out with Lily going then probs Landen (dan maybe plays idol) but then me juls/jules are in trouble after that point bc I think autumn and dan have something going on and Ruthie is in on it bc she is close to dan so. Here we are. Good Luck Charlie. (I’m Charlie)

I honestly feel so bad right now.  Lily does NOT deserve this but I think that it will appease everyone and she is a great player that I would not like to be sitting at the end with, I feel like she would easily win over me. 

I just got into an alliance chat with Lily and Landen (Double L cute) with me and Autumn my F2 and then Joanna who apparently knows nothing until Autumn tells her. It's neat because I ALREADY know how I'm setting myself up not to win this season more and more as I continue to play the merge portion poorly. We are going to vote out Ruthie because she's a double agent with Kevin so maybe they are another duo in the game? Guess we'll see how this goes.

[survivorreelsmagicwithin]

Episode 9- “THIS ROUND IS MAKING MY SCAR HURT”-Owen

I have honestly never been happier for a merge!!  I hope that Lily, Landen and I are still as tight as we used to be going into merge.  I'm excited to get to know Jules, she messaged me and we have a mutual friend and she seems so sweet!

GUESS WHO, BITCHES! Aheh! *sticks out tongue and cackles* I'm making MARSHMALLOW moves because 1 - I made the Merge, and with Jacob C and Max GONE!!! Thank FUCK because they are the perfect two people to have be gone first, Max being gone clears a major target off Hufflepuff's back and gets rid of a stigma I'm gonna have as him being my number, as well as a potential goat in this game that people would probably try to drag around. I already talked about Jacob being gone in an earlier confessional. I liked Max; but he was just seriously going to be a wrench in my game, so this is a major relief. I'm so glad to finally be done with the premerge stage (even though I was safe for 8/9 tribal councils... OK CUTE!)  And I'm ready to take on the big leagues. Hopefully I don't die ASAP. Obviously, I'm not just hoping that. Here's what this Hufflepuff is thinking moving forward. First of all, I found the Merge Idol, or the Avada Kedavra spell. This is honestly perfect, as soon as the mini challenge hunt was revealed I knew I would have to give it my EVERYTHING to find that damn idol, because there was literally no way I was ever going to find one of the branching path advantages. I don't even want to *try* to find one and keep track of all the paths I've followed, let alone actually having the luck and gut intuition to actually get there... Especially after seeing how hard yall made the escape room branching paths. Thanks, but no thanks. I'll just take the challenge one. I'm pretty nervous having it under my belt because I tend to get paranoid with idols, like *really* nervous about playing it correctly and making sure I have it at the right moment and everything, where I usually misplay or just don't end up playing. Hopefully I can avoid that and actually have the read to play it correctly this season, but at the end of the day, it's a security blanket. I did wind up telling Lily that I had it, mostly because I trust Lily ferociously, with ALL my heart, and I also know how skilled of a social player she is. If Lily gets any crucial information and wants us to play something, then she can give it to me and we'll be able to get it done and Lily won't feel lied to. It's crucial I keep her on my side because A - I genuinely want to work with her, I've been with her the whole time and I love her! And B - As long as we make it past these early stages like 11, 10, 9, She is always going to be a bigger target than me. Lily is a bigger social threat than I am with more conversationalist skills and inroads, once we get to the stage that people like that are targeted, she's gonna be the one that people go after, not her beta bitch little gay marshmallow friend :D and I'm okay with that!! I have a similar plan with Kevin, I'm ready to be his sub beta BITCH for as long as I need to because at the end of the day I'm confident people will target him over me for his challenge prowess, his inroads with almost everyone in the game, and the way he is going to have to betray people sooner or later. And again, another plan with Juls. I want to be close to Kevin, Juls, and Lily, and keep them around as shields for me. I'm not going to be the one to ruthlessly take them out, because I'm confident enough in my own gameplay that I don't need to do that, but if I can be there when they all get voted out and then pick up the pieces at Final Tribal, I'm MORE than happy to do so. ;) But as far as that goes, I need to first make the final 7 or 8 with all those shields in order to be okay in the game. Without becoming a SOCIAL POWERHOUSE, it might be.... let's just say DIFFICULT, for me to make the inroads with the Ravenclaws that I need to avoid their target early on. Early in the merge people are going to want to go for people that won't make WAVES and while me leaving would upset... Lily, and like, **maaaaaybe Juls**, if I'm lucky.. I don't think anyone else would be that torn up about it. So I have to find the right routes to survive right now, and this can be a time for my game to shine that I can use in my Final Tribal later to point out the positives of my game. I started with Kevin, I had a 2 hour call with him tonight just going over everything that happened in our games and kinda making a truce that JUST IN CASE this vote turns into a war of sides and we end up on opposite sides, let's please not gun for one another. But I also discussed the possibility of us working together with Lily, Ruthie, and potentially our very good mutual friend Autumn! If I want to work with Juls, also having Autumn may be a great way to get ourselves set up for the future, and if I am tight with Juls AND kevin wants to work with hufflepuff, that should be more than enough ammunition to convince Autumn, who already has strong bonds with me and Lily from our last swapped tribe (I love her btw!) to vote with us. The only problem here is that it would leave us with probably Owen as the only option, because I don't think Kevin will want to turn on any of Jules, Joanna, and Dan just yet. He also may not want to isolate them either which would make an Owen vote tricky. On the other hand I get the sense that Kevin might be willing to vote out Chips, we discussed that, BUTTT, Juls and Autumn would NOT be on board with that and if Kevin wanted to vote out Chips, maybe Juls and Autumn would find a way to sneak back in with the Ravenclaws and take the opportunity to blindside ME (owen wouldn't go for Ruthie, Lily is too good socially) and that's just a risk I'm not sure how ready i am to take... Meaning right now it might be better to subtly set up the vote to land on Owen, than Chips. Of course that's not even factoring immunity into the whole mess, and also other Pre-Game/Cross-Tribal relationships that WHO EVEN KNOWS WHAT THEY ARE!!! I'm sure lots more people know each other from past games and it'll probably all start coming out of the floodgates very soon, so for someone like me, who's relatively new to this community - I'm interested to see where the lines get drawn and what goes down. It honestly feels like this merge vote is going to be the Battle of Hogwarts, and I'm just donning my robes, gripping my wand, ready to make any marshmallow moves necessary to make to secure that my side wins. Hell, I'll secure myself through a Horcrux if I have to! (Which I guess in Survivor terms is equivalent to putting my soul into that idol so that I can revive myself through it when I 'die' to cancelled out votes!) Here we go, game on, this Final 11 is stacked, and it's EXACTLY what I've been waiting for.

Soooooo my loyal ass can’t help but still feel the most trust and loyalty to Ruthie, Landen, and Kevin. Now my brain is trying to think of some way to make this work so that none of us get voted out. The only thought I have right now is a girls alliance with Ruthie and I and I’m thinking juls and autumn? Then Kevin and landen in an alliance with dan and chips? Dan and Owen??? I think I should probably talk to Kevin and see where he is at. I just would hate for this to all backfire in my face now. I’m not ready to be done with this game and hope that the hufflepuffs don’t become the targets. It’s also helpful to note that landen told me he has the idol. He wants to keep it between us and I’m good with that. He says he would use it on me or for him. Whomever gets targeted first. I sure as hell didn’t get past the sudoku so this is great. I hope that I don’t become a target anytime soon and I can remain under the radar despite going to a rock vote...

In all honesty this merge has me VERY nervous for my life haha.  Everyone is so intimidating!  I need to message everyone but it is just very overwhelming! Right now I'm just talking to Lily, Landen, Dan and Jules!!  Jules is very nice and I'm getting great vibes from her- I can't remember if I already said that yesterday or not though, LOL. I need to message Autumn and get to know her, Lily says that she is someone we can potentially work with this merge. I think Lily and Landen still want to go after Owen and I just don't know about that, I need to message him and see where is head is, I still feel guilty about the round we went to rocks.

next day

Very little people are talking to me and keeping up with messages with me when I message them... so I smell a vote me out scheme trying to happen.  I'm going to wait for awhile to panic just in case people are sleeping, I'm going to idol search at my normal time and I prayyyyyy to the survivor gods that I find some kind of advantage so I'm not the one going home tonight.  Best case scenario would be for me to find something that could help the OG huffle puffles make it through! 

god landen when you read this i know ive only known u for a bit but i do love you with all my heart. but. you are A CLOWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! A STRAIGHT UP CLOWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! u are so cracked and i love you for it, but i dont know if you're trying to lie to me or u genuinely believe all the shit u say!!!! i just dont know!!! but ugh king...true king....much to think about....

2 hours later

AHHH are Landen, Owen and I really about to form some kind of power alliance here or...?  Going from having our names thrown around to potentially working together, I like the sound of that!  I think the people that threw my name out there were 100% Dan and Joanna which is VERY frustrating to me but... whatever.  Dan just told me he heard my name so he must sense that I know he was probably the one to suggest it or go along with it but I am going to be very wary.   In all honesty I would LOVE to work with Dan here but I just don't think it is going to work because I don't think we can trust each other as far as we can throw each other haha.  I think he is now just telling me that he heard my name to cover his ass so I don't go after him but UGH.  I would love for us all to just come together and vote out someone that is playing the middle at least this first round in the merge.  The people I think are in the middle right now are Chips, Juls, Autumn and sadly Kevin.  I want to say that he is with me but it is just really hard to tell right now :/ If we do come together to make like a huffleclaw alliance I'm going to suggest Juls or Chips go.  I feel like maybe some of them would be okay with that?? UGHH. I hate this part of the game y'all.  

Owen says that Dan doesn't want me to go? I'm SO UGHHH.   Okay so according to Owen, Autumn and Dan want Landen to go, and Juls and Jules want me to go which SUCKS because I felt good vibes from Jules whenever we talk.  Everyone else is just kind of in the middle but I think... that maybe we can get the votes for Joanna to go.  Owen seems to think that her and Dan aren't as tight as I thought they were.

THIS ROUND IS MAKING MY SCAR HURT First of all, I was very very happy to have won out to merge lol. I don't know what would've happened between Landen/Lily and Autumn/myself, but there would've been some fireworks lol. At the end of the day though we didn't have to worry about that! But now? My worries are ten times worse. I thought coming in that the three Gryffindor would join forces with Dan/Jules/myself, but the more time has gone on, the more I've realized Jules and Dan are NOT on the same page at all. Dan is so worried about Jules being a social player and having other connections, which I agree with wholeheartedly. Especially bc Jules came to me today and basically said: I like Landen and don't want to vote Landen, so unless you vote Ruthie, it's going to be you. LIKE WHAT! It was so freaking obvious Jules is trying to save Landen's ass for some reason and manipulate me into thinking it was a me vs. ruthie thing when really it's a landen vs. ruthie thing. Because now, Autumn/Dan seem to want to push Landen's name still, and Jules/Juls want Ruthie gone to save Landen, and I'm somewhere in the middle I guess??? But it sucks because in my heart, I really want to stay loyal to Dan, get revenge on Landen/Ruthie bc they freaking lied to me and got Jess out. But in my head I get this feeling that if I take out Landen rn, I'm going to be soon because I'll be a next big "threat," and that it'll turn into an Old West situation where all the players take each other out all merge and start to give the floaters more and more power. It's not fair! So I'm toying with the idea of pulling together with Lily/Ruthie/Landen and protecting them, so that hopefully they continue to get targeted as a group over myself. But in doing that, it seems like I'll just screw over Dan/Autumn, and I literally CANNOT do that. I wonder if there's a way to get Dan to want to do Joanna somehow? I don't know. I would feel ten times more okay if we could all get on the same page, save both Ruthie and Landen, and take out a non-threat. I'm falling into a trap I always do. I want too many people happy with me and too many things to be secure and go my way, so I'm making two different deals with two people, and I'm gonna have four enemies left in the game by tonight. So it's like - do I take the risk of pissing people off to save Landen? Or do I go with the path of least resistance and, against my better judgement, get Landen out of the game? I HATE SURVIVOOOOOOR

I LOVE this alliance I have with Landen and Lily, like I can't even.  I LOVE how transparent we are being with each other through the whole thing and how we are working together.  I also like that Landen and Owen are now getting along SO MAYBE I can continue to go far with all of them. I might not be so done tonight! SORRY all I keep doing is making confessionals.

I dunno who to vote out. I like everyone

I’ve honestly never hated a cast more than this one. I want to flip on all my allies, be a psycho, and just get voted out lmao

thought i made a confessional but i know for a FACT that i didn’t.. just girly tingz. but anyways so! this first merge vote gonna make me break out with how much stress it’s bringing me because every time jules kevin and i save landens ass he digs himself another hole HVDBDBD but i love him.. my cracked king. i just hope we can make this vote go the way we want it but OF COURSE. people just love to make things difficult.. sick to my mother fuckin stomach. 

I don't trust any of these people, everyone is WAY too quiet for right before a vote. Last I heard is that Landen, Lily, Owen, Dan, Kevin and I are voting Joanna but... WHAT? I just don't trust it, I really thought that Dan and Joanna were really close so I'm just... ugh. I wish we could get Jules out because I heard she is after me!  SO me being the nosy person I am did some digging on her big brother pokemon profile and may have more of an insight... sorry Jules when you read this I promise I'm not a stalker, LOL. Anyway, I'm beyond nervous, something just isn't adding up.  Even LILY my number one ride or die is being too quiet. :/

So I got sick and then kind of... talked a limited amount to people. Luckily Max was targeted instead of me and Jules and Juls voted with me to vote him out. Then we merged And merge is INSANE. Four names have been thrown: Ruthie, Landen, Owen, Joanna Each name gained steam in its own time but then petered out and then the other gained steam. Lily tried for the better part of an hour to explain how we need to vote out a Ravenclaw because they're scary. Autumn told me Kevin doesn't want to associate with the Hufflepuff sunken ship. It's been a lot and I think Ruthie is the final vote today? Of course, I think there will be an idol play or a power played and the outcome will be different. But that's who I voted. I want to be added to an alliance now that we merged and I"m too nervous to make my own. Hm... guess I'll be third wheeling it while everyone else uses me as an extra number.

Why are Lily and Landen not talking to me but Owen and Dan are??? THIS IS HOW... craziness happens. I am literally sweating bullets right now.

28 minutes later

I AM SEETHING RIGHT NOW. I'm frustrated that Landen won't vote for Jules when not everyone is comfortable voting for joanna right now and like literally ANYONE ELSE would vote for jules right now.  LANDEN OWEN AND I ARE FREAKING BREAKING OUR NECKS FOR YOU AND THIS HAPPENS I AM SO MAD.

8 minutes later

THIS is why the only person I idol hunt with is Lily.  I am SO MAD AT LANDEN RIGHT NOW. 

tribals in 10 minutes i need to do one of these really quick essentially autumn/jules/juls/chips wanna do ruthie and then lily/owen/dan/ruthie are down to do any of the other 4 but i dont wanna break trust with those ppl nor vote them out i really want owen out and i think i got my people on board with that ??? but we're waiting for autumn to get online idk if its gonna happen if it does this is insane this has to be a blindside but like idk if its gonna be im gonna scream and never stop screaming ever so idk idk idk oh my god but if owen goes home......... wow. i did that. but if i go home.......... wow. i did that. IM SORRY THIS IS SO NOT SPECIFIC

[survivorreelsmagicwithin]

Episode 8- “Slytherin is dead, hoes mad, what's new”-Autumn

ALRIGHT professors I was sitting really pretty and y'all really had to go put me with these people I haven't been on a tribe with... -_- okay, I've been on a tribe with Kevin but what if he, Dan and Joanna have some kind of power alliance, I feel like a sitting duck!!  THIS... is not cute lol. But on the more positive side I feel like Dan, Kevin and Joanna are all really strong players and maybe we can skate by without going to any tribal councils. Also, I feel like poor Max is a goner because I think he's grounded again. I just really hope that Lily makes it out of this alive!  I feel the same about Landen and even Owen (as long as he doesn't come for me, LOL jk love you) but at the moment Lily is the person I want to see at the end of this game!! 

4 minutes later

I was about to go to bed before all this happened... now catch me jumping into everyones PM's...  I swear, I NEVER talk to everyone like I have been in this game, I really want to do good and make it far and I'm stressed that this swap is going to send me packing! 

23 minutes later

So I have this OCD thing where I can't log off of skype until I answer all my messages and these people reply too fast, especially Joanna.  But okay, I'm feeling REALLY good about this tribe.  Everyone is nice and talkative and obviously I'm going to be on the bottom and the easy vote but....  Kevin seems happy enough to see me so maybe if we do have to worry about tribal I won't be in danger????   I like them all a lot though and I like that Joanna is a Harry Potter superfan so I can talk about books and movies with her. 

Your girl got too hopeful that it was merge. Can there just be like one round of this and he t to merge already, plzzzzzz?  Also. 1. Very pleased to still be on hufflepuff 2. Love that I’m still with landen. I overall really trust landen at least for a while and in this current moment. Things can change especially with me still paranoid about actually knowing 5 people now 4 (we miss you Jess) people in the game when I told landen I only knew 2. Sooo. Really excited to have to opportunity to talk with autumn again. She is a tru icon and it will be nice to catch up. And I’m laughing and loving that I’m still on a tribe with Owen. After clearly voting for him in the last tribal I’m gonna have to really talk to him in PMs now. I feel like the 4 of us could be a really strong tribe and hopefully do well at whatever the next immunity is but I can’t count on that. I know landen has my back but after voting for Owen at the last tribal it would make a tribal with us 4 realllll interesting. Excited for what is to come and trying to remain positive despite having my heart ripped out without merge. Hoping this next challenge is a fun one or Casanova because I’d love to start playing again. Haha. 

me: I'll never leave Gryffindor for Hufflepuff and you can't make me 

also me: https://i.pinimg.com/originals/57/88/40/57884096081b0494e51028e2942bfefd.

gif Totally forgot the part where Hufflepuff doesn't lose? Soooo maybe this is good- I can play nice with all my frenemies, we can kick back a bit before I have to slit throats, and it'll just be all good. I mean it needs to be all good cause I have a thesis to finish sooooo this back to back tribal energy has to stop I rebuke it. I also rebuke it because then I'm GUARANTEED next boot and I'll be damned. But yeah it's nice over here, everybody's all happy and relaxed and shit. It's truly a vibe and don't tell Gryffindor I said that hahaha also lmao at Jacob giving me my first vote because we been knew! And there is literally nothing that men can surprise me with at this point so go for it. Not to mention everyone wanted Jacob out, literally the entire time which is why the vote was unanimous?? There was just an order of operations and I respected that; hence why it took it so long. Me being the first to say Jacob's name four rounds ago wasn't earth shattering then or now but sure I'll take the credit for it. I said his name before it became cool to say his name but it did actually manifest lol so I'm good over here. Slytherin is dead, hoes mad, what's new

I was so blackout I don't even remember if I wrote a confessional last night... ANYWAY, we swapped!!! I'll talk about that more in a second, but can we first just take another second to STAN JACOB C GETTING VOTED OUT!!! I knew the psychic telepathic messages I was sending to Kevin would have my cute bb getting rid of Jacob for me, what an ANGEL. I stan One Kevin and ONE KEVIN ONLY. I'm so happy Jacob is gone because I know he would've come for me at the merge, not only that but he would've been an independent variable I wasn't prepared to deal with getting thrown into the mix of the war of houses and cross-tribal alliances that's about to probably go down. Onto the swap! Putting us into 3 tribes of 4 was SO ugly, you know that.... I'm literally going to kill Dan for even putting that out into the universe, I know it was already decided but it's still his fault for cursing and jinxing it. NEGATIVE VIBES. That being said, I also got onto Hufflepuff for the 3rd time in a row, which is GREAT because Hufflepuff is basically the blessed tribe and the BEST tribe! You all know I'm the ultimate Hufflepuff and now I have the tribal record to prove it. Not only that, but I've got to spend 3 tribal stages with Lily and I've honestly just gotten really close to her, I really appreciate talking to her about life, college, friendships, travel, hobbies, etc. She has a great strategic mind and is so wonderful socially. I just can't make it clear enough how much I enjoy and respect her as a friend and ally in this game. You always need a constant in Survivor and for me, Lily is that constant. So ending up on a tiny tribe of 4 where 2 votes means literally half the vote and a whole world of difference, having Lily and I together means a lot to me. It also means, bar any crazy spells, Lily and I have a lot of power and influence on this tribe should we go to tribal (which I won't allow, I'll kill all 8 people on the other tribes if I fucking have to. I am NOT going to tribal with 4 people in a game where spells and advantages run rampant. Someone's getting swapfucked.) As for the other 2 people on this tribe, I'm really glad we got Owen, actually. I know that probably comes off as a surprise and yes I am very nervous about what he might do to try and come for me and Lily if we go to tribal (hence why we CANNOT go), but like I said in my confessional last round, doing damage control with Owen and getting a better read on his game is going to be essential for my survival during the merge, he needs to feel comfortable with me. We both fell asleep that day and didn't catch each other at the right time to talk about it, so I'm *REALLY* glad I swapped with him to just have a few extra days to sort of nail things down. Of course that also brings me to Autumn who I'm just really really glad to have here for the same reason as Owen. I discussed how Autumn was a crucial vote I'm going to need, in that I want to work with her and Juls moving forward and I need to get to know her. Autumn and I have already bonded over a lot of things and it's been great to talk to her, I can't wait to get to know her even better and hopefully work with her in the future. This tribe was set up perfectly for me to use it as a vantage point for setting up an excellent merge; but I can't deny that in terms of going to tribal, it's going to be VERY difficult to survive and also VERY difficult to vote someone out who I deem essential to my game, so yeah... I'm really hoping we don't go. With the challenge performance record of the 4 that are here I don't think it's going to be hard to avoid an immunity loss, so that's good. Looking forward to what the future holds! Marshmallow moves! 

new tribes hm.. um, only happy to see jules <3 jk i love chips and max BSSBSN but mac is grounded so i see this taking a toll on some of these challenges, and i literally Cannot see myself voting out jules of chips so uh. hehe! it’s really funny that chips and i have been together since the beginning though, the way i would literally die for that man.. unreal. he’s just the absolute sweetest :pleading: but in another note, WOO! made jury bitches! now all i need is these tribes to merge and i am SET. 

Seriously this entire tribe responds SO fast I can't keep up, LOL. I'm excited for the challenge tomorrow.  I really think that we are going to have an advantage because these people are literally always around and typing something when I send a message so maybe we'll win.   Also, I'm not sharing this with them but if Max is still grounded that might give us ANOTHER advantage of him not posting stuff.  I don't want to tell them this and for them to all get lazy though, so.. I wish these people would stop asking questions in the tribe chat so I could finish my search, grrr. I don't want to sign this off until I finish in case I find something because I want to write about it! I'm really sad that Lily and I aren't on the same tribe anymore, I copy and pasted the spreadsheet we've been using to search to a separate one since we can't compare notes this round -_- grrr nothing, okay I'm heading to bed but at least I know I have enough confessionals this round. 

This challenge makes me want to die

16 minutes later

I refuse to lose this challenge. Will I be going to "school" on 4 hours of sleep? Yes. But I haven't missed a single one since 10 am (and as i'm writing this is 1 am). I'm not losing this challenge. I'm not voting these people out.

1 hour later

another hour.... another chunk of my sanity gone

50 minutes later

I AM SUFFERING

So like we all know by now, I have a big mouth and told my tribe about Max getting grounded shortly before the swap.  No idea if he still is or not but that would be nice for this challenge. Also if I woke up at 3:45 AM and we lose I'm going to be MAD!! 

5 hours later

UGH look at me actually talking a lil in the great hall instead of sleeping, I missed Landen :( PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE LET.  US.  MERGE! 

the way i stayed up 24 hours...only missed TWO...and still lost because NO ONE ELSE PUT THE CONSISTENCY AND EFFORT THAT I DID....if these people vote me out it's riggamorris....yall better give me most robbed juror....or cutest harry potter fan that's fine with me too EWFJIWEJIWF

WE WON!!! THE SUFFERING WASN'T IN VAIN!!! I'M SO HAPPY

So I feel like I contributed a lot to the last challenge but shout out to Kevin and Joanna for fucking holding it down over night! I definitely still contributed the least so I’m blessed that we won! I’m really praying for merge tonight, but I really feel like there’s gonna be one last round and a merge at 10. I’m worried that another person will join the jury that I don’t have a great relationship with. But at the same time, I don’t want Jules to be voted out because I do feel like she is loyal to me. I’m hoping chips goes honestly ahhaha we NEVER have a great relationship in games. OH and I have such a soft spot for Ruthie, like I love her spirit and her energy, but she also knows I can get to the end and have a good shot at winning (RIP @ me getting robbed in TS: RvR a few months ago). She is someone I want to keep close because she’s GREAT socially, where I’m not, but I’m also keeping an eye on her bc I played her last time. 

If this isn’t the last tribal before merge I might lose it. Now will be the time to tell if my lack of experience in tribals will bite me in the butt. Excited to see what this advantage is tonight as well. Hoping that max isn’t voted out just yet as I see him as someone who would vote with me and be honest with me in merge. I also think some people might want to vote him out before myself or another one of my allies so he would be helpful to have around. I still feel the strongest trust with Ruthie and landen. I hope it’s a while before they would want to turn on each other. I need to touch base with Kevin and see where he is at. I also think chips and juls would be really great allies in this game despite voting differently at the tribal we attended together. I’m ready for the next stage of the game and if it isn’t time for that yet I might go crazy. 

I HATE IT HERE! I HATE THIS FOUR PERSON TRIBE THING AND HOW MAX WANTS JULES OUT! i don’t think anyone understands that i would literally lay down my life for jules and i refuse to let them go anywhere. literally Not on my fucking watch!!!! this vote is literally gonna kill me and max is like i trust you the most :heart: well yea.. because u know ur in danger.. funny how this is the first time we’ve talked game NNN. anyways. i live max but in order for jules to thrive he’s gotta go!

WE WON IMMUNITY !!!!! I DIDNT STAY UP FOR 24 HOURS FOR NOTHING !!!! I AM SO HAPPY !!!!! I hope the merge is after this 

It's like I just single-handedly annihilated, you know, every ORG bitch in the building Like, like, I'm Julesy Minaj, Julesy Lewinsky, Julesy the Ninja, Julesy the Boss, Julesy the Harajuku Barbie Like I mean I don't even know why you girls bother at this point! Like, give it up, it's me! I win! You lose HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Oh shit hahaha, yo

[survivorreelsmagicwithin]

Episode 7- “#MarshmallowMoves”-Landen

I can't tell if I'm in trouble or not. They voted out Nick, which is something I really really didn't want to happen. Kevin is acting strangely towards me. The only person I feel like who is being genuine with me right now is Dan. I'm not sure if I should keep pretending that everything is fine, but I'm pretending that the last vote didn't bother me. 

1 hour and 33 minutes later

I hope the relationships I made before that disaster of a vote are real still. That's all I'm hoping.

Today's immunity challenge is a luck challenge. There is no way to be "good" at rock-paper-scissors unless you are playing real-time. For this reason I have chosen to use random.org for all of my guesses. I hope that luck is on my side with my matchup. Also, I went to Potions Class today and looked in some cauldrons. No potions left behind. Thinking I will try luck potion tomorrow. Hopefully I'll be lucky and get an idol. Probably not. 

YAYYYYY!  Another week with no tribal and I am very thankful because the one we had was wild and I don't have to deal with anything like that again for AWHILE!  I should be staying up to search right now but I am about to head to bed and then make my search time earlier for tomorrow, woohoo! I feel like after tribal something like a merge might happen?? maybe? I feel like it should be about time! 

so Hufflepuff won (YET AGAIN!) and I'm feeling pretty great about that! there's not much to discuss about the actual events on this tribe, it's pretty much same old same old positioning. like stale cardboard! however, we got an exciting little hint of something at the immunity challenge today. it seems like there's going to be something coming up after tribal tonight, and particularly, i would guess that it will be a merge. of course i could be wrong and we could be thrust into another swap (a horrible outcome, really) but i'm hoping it's a merge. i've had a lot of paranoia about what would happen during a merge ever since the messy Jess rocks vote, so i just am excited to get it over and done with!! that being said i'm also not just like, throwing myself to the wolves of fate or something. i've also been doing planning ahead and thinking about the merge. specifically, i'm trying to calculate where numbers might go. right now, we have a group that is configured like this: -5 hufflepuff -4 Ravenclaw -3 Gryffindor -1 Slytherin (i know, crazy... and it's my least favorite one. UGH!) obviously, this puts a liiiiittle eensie teensie tiny target on the hufflepuffs' back, now doesnt it? and that's not very cute for me, someone who is very much IN hufflepuff - has had no time to form the strong relationships that kevin has with the other side - has burned the 1 ravenclaw and probably 1 of the gryffindors here on this tribe - and hasn't done any looking for spells! no, no, thats not very bueno at all, i'd say. of course, everything could be shaken up if kevin is taken out, but i'm not expecting that. it'll probably be a jacob or autumn boot.. i'm praying for a jacob boot but who knows. honestly just taking out that wildcard, one who is very fitting to his house mascot as a snake, that's something that would be VERY appreciated. i know i can't trust him after our experience in 2020 and it's not just bc i hold a grudge it's because i know the type of player he is, and that's not a type of player i can work well with in this game. Anyway, this brings us into the question of what the hell i am going to do to survive at the merge, and honestly, i have no fuckin clue. the good news is i do not think juls would be on board with a plan to vote me out, or at least she would do her best to vouch for me. as soon as we merge my sights will be set on autumn, too. i need to secure her loyalty and form a strong friendship with her, she's always seemed like a cool person and i wanted to do it anyway, but knowing i need to have her and juls on my side, makes this bond even more crucial. The bad news is Owen on this tribe, is a VERY dangerous player, will come into the merge with an army of 3 strong fellow Ravenclaw, and, last but definitely not least concerning - he comes into the merge with a strong relationship with Ruthie. This is VERY bad for me, because I know that if Owen decides to get Ravenclaw to target Hufflepuff and for some reason the Gryffindors (or potentially Jacob, if Autumn gets targeted, or even worse, Jacob AND autumn if Kevin goes home), he won't be going for Ruthie. If he's not going for Ruthie, he's not going to go for Lily, not to mention I highly doubt the Gryffs will go for her anyway because she's so lovable. Having Lily as my closest ally is a risk/reward, because when I enter the final rounds like 8, 7, 6, etc, she will be a HUGE shield for me and someone that will take off a lot of the heat on my name. But i need to get there, and that means i can't get taken out for being an extra vote for her during the early stages of the merge, i have to find my own way to survive. There is always the possibility they would target Max, but I have to be VERY careful in just assuming this, because i also know Max is probably going to look like a tempting goat to most people. he's not very great socially (at least individually) and he's not very active with his mom kinda grounding him all the time, like he just looks like an OTT goof and he'll probably come across as easy to manipulate once his ally Landen gets blindsided! I'm very worried that'll be the perception. So i need to start taking action now to make sure this early merge doesn't go down a dark path i see as a possibility. Step 1. Owen and Ruthie, Today. This is CRUCIAL. I am going to talk to Owen about game today whether he likes it or not, I'm going to drag it out of him and i'm going to fight like hell to get him to trust me even a little bit. I know I can be a good social player and I KNOW i can talk convincing game, but I also know Owen is very good at social skills and reading me so it's going to be a bit of a cagey death match with this one. I need to make sure Owen feels good about me moving forward into the merge and that I can "repent for my Sins" so to speak after basically throwing him up for crucifixion during the Jess boot round. If I can get owen into the idea of possibly an alliance of me, him, and ruthie, then maaaaybe i could protect myself a bit from him. perhaps i could also very subtly hint that lily is the one that's been coming after him harder than i have, i have to be careful with that because if it gets back to her i'm fucked, so i'll keep an eye out on the conversation and see how the tide's going and if it's worth hinting at. i also need to discuss with Ruthie and figure out what her other pregame relationships are, and see where we can get ins. I know being honest and open game talk with Ruthie earlier is what got her trusting me a bit more, so I want to just expand on some of the personal stuff I've been building on with her in the past couple days and just really start hitting the game talk home. Step 2. Max and Chips. If i can drive this wedge further, it would be faaanfuckintastic. I need to re-iterate to people that I DONT got Max's back. If people start pushing the narrative of me and max as a thing, or me as a hufflepuff strong person just because of the jess round, i'm screwed. so i'm going to have to be very careful to Make sure everyone knows exactly how willing I was to cut Max. When i get to the merge, the FIRST thing i'm going to do is literally have like, an hours long call with Kevin. I want to establish to him that i'm his extra number, his goat, his whatever he needs. I want to tell him how i was ready to sacrifice Max, i want him to give me ALL the details. Of course if Kevin goes home before the merge this is going to be a million times more difficult and so that brings me to Chips, my key plan today besides working on Owen is going to be to work on Chips. I don't want to give Chips too many promises I don't plan to keep because I don't see myself working with him super long-term, but I do want to Get a better read on him. Right now Chips is just an enigma to me and I need to get into his head, maybe at least get him to open up a *little* bit more, bc our game relationship right now is just a mess, he's so hard to talk to about these strategic things at times, even before the jess boot but especially after. as far as the other people go, the ones i didn't mention - owen's ravenclaw buddies, joanna, jules, and dan - who's to say they're even really tight with owen! I'll be curious to meet them, specifically Jules is someone that strikes me as someone I'd get along with. I also see a lot of potential for me to get along with Dan but we'll have to see on that one. I'm going to try to work on my relationships with Ravenclaw once I hit the merge too, but I'm gonna be careful because if I come on too strong, they'll consider me even more of a threat and that'll give them more of a reason to target me instead of Lily or Max. i know i'm in a precarious position and that's not even to mention spells, but I'm really trying to think over every angle here, and i think with some luck on my side and hopefully, some Kevin on my side, i can utilize kevin, lily, juls, and max as tight shields for my game, and continue working my way through the middle to make it alllll the way to the end. #MarshmallowMoves. i know this was an ESSAY so thanks for sticking it through. i really hope i don't write all this for nothing, because i'm starting to get excited that the big leagues are almost here, it's finally time for me to stop winning immunity every single round and actually experience the game, and i would hate for it to get cut short so soon. Game on wizards, cus this honey badger DONT care! >:D *flashes my claws but not in a furry way* haha thanks. bye ^_^ <3 

So..... once again, I lost a BEST FRIend to ROCKS! I swear I’ve got some kind of curse. Every time people have gone to rocks for me in games, it’s always my closest ally that leaves. And this time is no different :( I’m so sad Jess is gone, but I know she’s rooting for me, and that’s what will get me through this. I know I should’ve known better than to leak everything Ruthie said but I really trusted that juls chips and jess would act in their best interest. Apparently it was Landen who told Ruthie..... so I dont know. Maybe I accidentally told Landen the things Ruthie told me!? Or maybe someone else threw me under the bus. Either way, all bets are off now. I want to get to a merge with dan Jules and Joanna and paint a huge ass target on these hufflepuff nerds. I’m boutta hex the shit out of those four til they’re all out of this game. I WILL! Get my revenge for jess. But to do that it’s basically about winning challenges to merge which thankfully we have done. People tried hard on the music video thankfully and then we got lucky with attack defend balance. All I can hope is we MERGE NEXT!!! There’s a bounty on my head and if we don’t merge soon I’m heading to Azkaban :(

I’m soOoOoOoOoOoOo paranoid! I feel like it would be such a good move to get me out this round because I’ve been so loose with my powers. I feel like all it will take is for Jules to want jacob here more than me, tell everyone about my powers, and then have everyone vote for me!!!! Do I just waste powers tonight to make sure that doesn’t happen? Maybe. 

I think jacobs going home :c which is so sad but he’s not really trying, it’s really quiet tho so anything could happen, joanna might still be upset I lied last round and flip things on me who knows !!

Maybe Jacob is actually going home this time? Idk, last time they said Jacob and Nick went home so who knows what these people are telling me.

The good news I pulled off the Nicholas vote. The bad news is we're back at tribal but are we even surprised lmao https://media.giphy.com/media/l4pTsh45Dg7jnDM6Q/giphy.gif the tea is I'm mad but I'm not pissed because I only want people who are down for the cause. It's gonna be all hands on deck once we hit merge and I don't have time for any disloyal non-Hufflepuff people. So Gryffindor constantly losing really means Owen, Chips, and Juls will actually live to see merge, all three of whom I know will join the coalition. Nicholas and Jacob on the other hand would probably link up with Hufflepuff and that's what I don't need. So if we merge tonight, it's a 7-5 breakdown with Hufflepuff being outnumbered. Mind you that depends on everyone in that 7 cooperating with each other but let's be optimistic and assume that everyone recognizes ALL of Hufflepuff is still in the game. And if you ain't Hufflepuff, you can and will get snuffed so don't fall for the hype at merge and any member of Gryffinclaw who does is dead to me. Ok now Imma need y'all to go ahead and merge us thanks

IT BETTER BE MERGE!!!! IT BETTER BE MERGE~!!!!!!

I can't remember if I wrote one of these or not this round so here is another... Things are quiet on the Hufflepuff tribe and I'm nervous about the swap that i think is about to happen!!  It has been kind of quiet today. I've talked to Owen a lot and Landen, Lily and Juls a little today.  Being safe is nice but it will be fun to start competing for things individually. If we do merge I am excited to maybe work with Dan.  I want to be on his good side, lol, but he is a good player and I feel like if he doesn't go home tonight he and Owen will single handedly win every individual immunity. 

We won the random.org immunity! I think we will likely merge now that numbers are low enough. You can not find an idol by brewing luck potion. You suck at brewing potions. Duh!

Y’all I’m fucking screaming!!!! I found a third power lmao. I’m gooped! I found the riddikulus charm or something and I had to play a fake advantage at a tribal in order to power it up and I used Raffy’s rat ass to make it happen! I’m not sure what my power is rn but I’ll add it to my vote steal and my idol 😌

[survivorreelsmagicwithin]

Episode 6- “No matter what I throw to the wall, it won’t erase whatever writing is currently there”-Nick

SOMEHOW. .. I escaped rocks!  and the whole hufflepuff alliance did too!  I'm really sad about Jess going because I ADORE her but...  ugh. Part of me is very glad that Owen is still in the game because I feel like maybe I can salvage my relationship I had with him and we can sneakily work together without the rest of my alliance getting wind of it.  I just hope that hufflepuff doesn't have to worry about going to tribal again anytime until the merge.  That was... WOW. 

I have crazy news all you cool cat and kittens! https://media.giphy.com/media/RGixkYkOKdWATSReHt/giphy.gif 

 Tribal happened and instead of it being between me and Max as I had anticipated the Hufflepuffs voted for Owen. That's... a twist!! Anyway, since they are a bunch of phonies who lie I stuck my vote against Max and everyone else stuck with theirs letting rocks decide

 https://media1.tenor.com/images/422ca011d526025e11c9eaf90a3edf59/tenor.gif?itemid=11361132 

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This is kinda funny since we were joking about letting fate decide the vote prior to the crazy round. Also, I think Jess scored the lowest on the immunity challenge so it's like we voted off our weak link even though she didn't even do that much worse and it's a terrible way to look at things since she was such a good ally. Anyway, hoping immunity is something that we can win so that we don't suffer another tribal council because I'm pretty confident that they won't take a swing at Owen again just yet.

I LOVE how my business is getting spread from person to person LOL.  This is like the game of telephone that just keeps going.  I WAS MAD AT OWEN FOR TELLING PEOPLE I WAS IN AN ALLIANCE!  WHICH I SHOULDN'T HAVE TOLD HIM ABOUT IN THE FIRST PLACE.  somehow it has now gotten turned to me telling owen how i felt about max LOL.  Yes, I did tell Owen that i usually just talk to max in the OG Hufflepuff chat but NO THAT DOES NOT MEAN I WANT TO KEEP OUTING MY ALLIANCE TO EVERYONE IN THE WORLD now chips is wanting tea and i gave him some but i'm trying to without admitting the hufflepuff alliance chat that everyone already knows about now anyway.  WHY IS MY DRAMA THE CENTER OF ATTENTION ON THIS TRIBE CAN'T  SOMEONE ELSE RUN THEIR MOUTH NOW SO PEOPLE CAN TURN THEIR ATTENTION TO SOMEONE NEW??? but okay I think Owen and I are good now but I still trust Lily above EVERYONE else in this game. 

Hm... so Landen told me that he was planning on giving more information before the revote and the rock draw.. but unfortunately he wasn't there to share. I find out that Owen already communicated to him that Max and myself are the expendable bottom two of our tribe and that just kinda... syncs up with what I said earlier about Owen. Here I was thinking we had turned over a leaf. I'm going to give him another chance with me. And not judge him based on what somebody else said (and could have been lying about) that he said. But if the shoe fits. https://media1.tenor.com/images/a19f8b641e24d8c212ba0b3913af45ca/tenor.gif?itemid=11553933

THIS IS MY CONFESSIONAL FOR LAST ROUND DONT GIVE ME A STRIKE PLZZZZZ ok really quickly basically the last vote was on raffy bc he tried to get the vote on jacob or jules (not me thank goodness) and he blew up his own game, i have 3 alliances one with joanna nick and jacob and one with joanna dan and jules and then my core alliance with jules and jacob, raffy was kinda the outlier for my own game because i had an alliance with everyone else and then i clicked well with autumn so i wanted it to be raffy and it kinda just came up that way organically and he did himself no favors. I kinda pitched to autumn how after this we're the sole people from our og tribes and we should stick together because if we lose again i kinda wanna vote out dan bc he has an idol and an undisclosed advantage ON TOP OF THAT so he is really dangerous and he thinks jules trusts him but me and jules are each others number 1s (i hope at least) and they are telling me everything, in a perfect world me jules jacob and autumn vote dan if we lose to avoid nick slipping anything and joanna from having an emotional time with it since she struggled with just voting dan out, its a big move but i think it needs to happen, it's also the best cast for me personally bc i have the weakest individual connection to dan whereas with joanna and autumn i feel really strongly with and like i can work with them, nick is also there but he doesnt pose much of a threat and i think with jacob still being in the game he will trust me or jacob the most and we can use that as a number. Anyways we ended up winning this challenge anyways so it didnt matter but heres to hoping we win again bc while i would be ok with dan going if we can win immunity thats priority, so heres to hoping we can do that

3 minutes later

OK THIS IS MY CONFESSIONAL FOR THIS ROUND RIP JESS !!!!!!!!!! I AM SO SAD JESS IS GONE I LOVE HER WITH MY ENTIRE BEING SHE IS SO FUN AND SO GOOD AND I WANTED TO PLAY WITH HER BUT SURVIVOR GODS SAID NOPE I AM REALLY SAD. i am so sad. but the game moves on, with jess leaving nick really has no one besides me and jacob and maybe joanna? but she is more loyal to her og ravenclaws, so im hoping he sticks to my side, autumn and i are clicking well but shes just likable so shes clicking with everyone, i hope we can get closer in the game as well bc i wanna work with her, dan scares me alot, if we lose again i might try to blindside him with jules but idk, its all up in the air, challenge is music videos, im not particularly fond of this challenge or any judgement based challenge for that matter but i am rolling with it, it's usually fun i guess, but im awkward so eek, idk my tribe doesn't seem like the type to stand out in a music video but maybe they will all surprise me and turn it out, heres to hoping that happens! ok bye for now!

I’m probably being super sensitive rn but I really don’t like Joanna. Like at all. If it’s not her idea, she doesn’t want to do it. Like she’s so demanding and annoying and I feel like it’s probably just the game getting to her but I really don’t like it

So after my last confessional, what happened was I went to Ruthie to double check whether the information I was getting was true and she did want to vote for Max. i made sure to cover my bases discussing this with Lily and also telling Ruthie I'm totally down to vote Max if she is, i want to make myself as trustworthy as possible to her and start working with her more down the line, it's key moments like these where establishing trust is VITAL! with her being pissed that owen spread the information and wanting to vote hufflepuff strong though, it was the perfect time for us to try to make a move on owen. I was really confident I could flip Juls and Chips on the revote, and the truth is if I hadn't NAPPED THROUGH TRIBAL.. LMAO... I most likely could have. But it all worked out in the end since we deadlocked and Jess went home in the rocks. I love Jess and was really excited to work with her, but it's very obvious I wasn't a priority to her, and her going home leaves 4 Hufflepuffs on this tribe, so I'm okay with the results. I did my best afterward and will continue to work hard on damage control with Owen, Juls, and Chips. I went from perhaps one of the upcoming boots to a higher up social center on this tribe and I'm hoping that goes mostly unnoticed? But who knows. That's why we gotta win this challenge! Speaking of, it's a music video challenge! Yay I'm so happy I got to do one of these sooner rather than later :D I've had a blast coordinating the challenge with Lily. We work really well together and I feel it extends to challenges, but also our casual conversation, and just the fact that we get along so well, she is pretty much my tightest person in the game right now and I think that we can do a lot of damage as a long term duo (especially with an alliance with Ruthie, Max as an additional number to that, and us being Positioned in the middle tier of the Huffs.) I'm well aware how likable Lily is though so I'll keep that in mind before I promise ride or die loyalty forever, but for right now I'm very happy working with her. I'm STILL not going to look for any spells, sorry bout it. but yyyeaah... Overall I'm pretty satisfied with the MarshmallowMoves I've been making and im looking forward to what happens next in this crazy game.

Our music video is........ gonna lose lmao. It’s no shade at Joanna bc fuck editing. But it’s soooooooooooooo boring. I feel like the judges will watch like 30 seconds and fall asleep. It’s a cute song choice and everything, but it’s also....... so bland. The Harry Potter puppet pals would have been so good and I stand by it. 

I'm literally SO HAPPY!!! Hufflepuff won a creative challenge that I did a lot of work directing on (HUGE props to Lily who I love and was amazing to work with on this), and some of my ideas got mentioned in the comments as good things!! I'm honestly just ecstatic about the way this whole challenge went down, it was so much fun. Juls did an amazing job editing, the filming everyone else did was fantastic, I'm just in love with this tribe and I'm so happy with the music video we did. Not only that, but I wasn't feeling too hot about tribal council. It's not that I thought I'd be going home, but I thought the vote would be very difficult. It most likely would have had to fall on Chips or Owen - if it had been Chips, that would be really tough and could even result in some spell plays being cast against us, with the vote being probably 4-3 since Juls/Chips are close. If it had been OWEN though, Juls and Chips maybe would've voted with us, but Ruthie probably would've not wanted to go for him now that they've had a chance to talk it out since she admitted to their old Final 2. Luckily Ruthie and I were able to now agree on an official alliance between us and Ruthie, so it looks like we've got a lot to do together and I'm excited to see what the future holds. I've been trying to damage control a bit with Chips and Owen, I'm not sure how well it's working. Owen is a very naturally social person and I feel that he is quite good at deceiving his true feelings and emotions, either that or he is very rational and calm about the game, not upset he VERY nearly got blindsided - either way, he's super dangerous and I can't just trust that we had a nice conversation one time, it'd be dumb of me. I'm feeling positive about where I stand with this tribe right now though, I don't think anyone would be able to get a strong majority to target me because I really don't think Juls, Max, Ruthie, or Lily would want to vote me out. At least I sure hope not! No, but, a lot of times with creative challenges in these games I struggle because I am pursuing creative passions in real life, so even though it's just a few judges, it can feel defeating when you get judged bad and harsh critique. I take those criticisms into account but it can still make you feel a little self conscious at times. Winning this challenge was a huge boost and just something that made me feel good, not to mention the fun times I had doing it with everyone on the team. Overall - a GOOD DAY! One could even say.. "A sunny day!" (one of my lines in the music video DUH) Hopefully Kev doesn't go out, curious to see where this game goes next. Adios~

So thankful that we won! Although I feel like I need to deal with the madness that was the last tribal but if I’m being honest I’m just not ready. Last tribal was so beyond crazy but I know that’s part of the reason why I play. I didn’t play this game to play it safe. I’d rather mess my game up trying to make a move then sitting in the sand and letting others dictate what happens on a vote. Although in the end...rocks made the call. I really miss Jess and her company on the tribe. It sucks when someone leaves that you get along well with and I could see the potential of us working together in the future. Jess is a strong player and made it through so much already in this season. Seeing her go def has a huge impact on the rest of the game that’s for sure. I appreciate how Jess stuck to her guns too which I completely understand. With her going it shows me that I really need to prove myself and continue to be as bold as I can be without getting caught that is. I haven’t talked to Owen since we tried voting him out. He knows what happened. I know what happened. It’s awkward but I’m glad that we could all still have fun with the music video challenge. Landen and I did a lot of the planning and Juls did the editing. And everyone put in their input on ideas and sending in quality magic videos. I’m glad we turned out with something cute and fun. I wanted to suggest a tiger king song in Jess’s honor but wasn’t sure if the judges would appreciate it in the same way. Wondering what’s going to happen in this game. Ruthie and I have been working together in the castle to find an idol. So far no luck and I assume at this point in the game anything and everything would have been found by now. But who knows. We shouldn’t give up that’s for sure. Even though last tribal was incredibly difficult and hard and I’m not sure if I even handled it the best way I could, I’m still having fun playing this game and glad to be here. Hoping merge is around the corner even though I’m not ready for the craziness that comes with it. 

Y’all this vote is stupid af haha. THE LADIES ARE FIGHTING! And by ladies I mean Autumn and Nick. They both want each other dead, and Joanna wants Jacob dead lmao. Me and Kevin are legit sitting here like 🥴

last round.. mess. this round.. thank god we won LMAOOO. i honestly don’t know what all to say because i’m starting to question where everyone stands with me, BUT. i think i’ll be fine.. hopefully. unless people keep lying to me, that’s when i’m como se dice.. fucked <3 

okay lemme scream in my dr real quick....jacob's ass DIDNT DO SHIT IN THE CHALLENGE BC HES IN 7 FUCKING ORGS BUT IF I VOTE HIM OUT AGAIN I HURT HIS FEELINGS??? he's also a loyal ally to me (at least, loyal enough) but he wants to keep NICK in who?? literally is gunning for me?? dude you put urself in this position not doing the challenge and it makes me so angry that i have to cover for him and cover his ass!! when he didnt do shit!! and i honestly think he's !!!! good enough to vote out at this point!!! especially bc mister dan thinks i know jacob IN REAL LIFE??? IM SICK IM SICK IM SICK IM SICK !!!!!!!! JACOB SHOULD'VE TRIED IN THE CHALLENGE!!! HE GOT HIMSELF INTO THIS MESS!!!

Good news! I mean,  it's kind of good news. We had a music video challenge and we picked a fun song. We did Magic by Selena Gomez sung for The Wizards of Waverly Place movie! So that was a lot of fun... and I suggested to our tribe we have some sort of "story" and aren't just lip syncing because I have had too many lost lip syncs where we lost because of no story being evident. So we did a "getting into Hogwarts" and being Hufflepuffs and it was cute! And fun!! I'm pretty sure if we lost I would be the vote off since they think Owen has an idol so they would vote me out since Landen has a close relationship to Juls and so I'm the next most obvious choice. Anyway! Our story carried us to the win!!! I believe this might be the first time across all ORGs that I've won a lip sync comp. That might be a lie, but I have a pretty bad track record.

ooooooh if this tribe don't make a damn DECISION! https://media.tenor.com/images/4ff794852927c7441b26618a705b340f/tenor.gif The vote has been me, Jules, Jacob, Nicholas, God, Trump- you name it. Particularly because Nicholas refuses to just sit down and eat his food. Like everyone was just gonna vote Jacob and then Nicholas had to start throwing names out, starting with me of course, so I've literally been whipping the vote all day. And just when I got a majority on Nicholas, now he's making a group chat with Joanna, Dan, and Kevin (aka all the white people lmao) to inform them that he's now ready to vote Jacob??? 

 https://giphy.com/gifs/bad-girls-club-bgc-rocky-8Cprh3gaXGGQw 

 Where was that energy at like 2:00? And why am I always saying that about Slytherin? They're nocturnal I swear to God and they don't give a fuck until the sun goes down because otherwise make it make sense. Why take us all through changes for 5 hours if you're actually down to vote your brother out? Like we have lives- make a decision and stick to it. And then all that back and forth is just showing your ass?? So now EVERYONE knows who you want out and just how indecisive you are. And tbh sending him out would do him a favor because how are you gonna come back from exposing your entire hand. I honestly want us to go back to tribal after this just so I get another shot at him before merge. Cause if he mobs up with Hufflepuff at merge it's a wrap for me. But! today we learned who's really with who and that shit is KEY: Jacob and Joanna got beef, Nick apparently has beef with me and Jules, Nick has Joanna and thinks he has Dan but doesn't, Kevin and I are solid, Dan and I are officially made a deal, and I think Jules thinks Ravenclaw is solid buuuut that ain't true lmao. But like it's fine Basically all's well that ends well, a Slytherin boy will go home and I have no clue which but I don't care at this point because enough is enough, and I'm going back to watching How to Get Away with Murder. So call me when y'all ready for me to vote https://66.media.tumblr.com/a6fc82d986adfcc112785f209fe163bd/tumblr_inline_ngmjfrxq071sggcf2.gif

WITH GOD AS MY WITNESS JOANNA IS RIGHT!!!!! SHE'S RIGHT!!!!! 

Long story short, I hate everyone here. Everyone is running around acting a fool about who to vote and frankly i don't even care who goes. my worry is that joanna knows about my steal a vote and I don't want her to fucking leak that shit around if I vote out nick, but at the same time I don't trust jacob because he's legit never online!! maybe i'll just tell joanna right before the vote that kevin told me he was voting nick so I flipped??? i'm so stressed. 

okay. im fine now. ITS FINE!!!! I LOVE YOU JACOB !!!! IF UR READING THIS I LOVE U BITCH!!!! AINT NEVER GONNA STOP LOVIN U BITCH!!!!! EVEN WHEN U MAKE GAMES HARD!!!!!!!

This round has been a whirlwind. I feel I’m losing the morals I entered the game with, because I’m possibly having to sacrifice my final slytherin teammate to stay in the game. I thought I had a grasp on this tribe, but I genuinely feel so lost. It’s exhausting, and I’ve been fighting back tears of exhaustion and defeat the entire day. I trust Joanna and Kevin with all my heart, but I secretly fear Joanna is just pocketing me as a number. Personally, I think we are great friends, but gameplay-wise, I do think she’s trying to gain me as a workable number. More power to her. I did not even suggest Autumn, I merely asked if that’s who is being considered since she’s one of the people, to my limited knowledge, that was outside the brewing majority alliance. I suppose it was leaked to her, meaning that I got blamed for a crime I did not commit. I tried fixing it with Autumn and Jules, but I’m unsure of my success. I believe Jacob will leave tonight, but I fear it’s my time. I’ve tried so hard, I just hate it. I applied to this game as a Ravenclaw, but I was placed on Slytherin. I’ve went to every tribal but one, but the one I did not go to resulted in one of my two allies leaving. Speaking of that, I’m thankful that Jess and I worked things out, genuinely. I just want to stay and fight, but I feel the spotlight is fading. No one is receptive, and no matter what I throw to the wall, it won’t erase whatever writing is currently there. ~ nick.

THIS IS AN AUTUMN APPRECIATION POST. I REPEAT. THIS IS AN AUTUMN APPRECIATION POST. PLS KNOW I LOVE YOU!!!!!!! POINT BLANK PERIOD!!!

Me almost forgetting to make one of these! I LOVE that we won another challenge and I really feel like something is about to happen to shake up the game, maybe a swap and one person is isolated for a bit or... merge? Okay sending this in before it’s late and I get a strike hehe. 

https://youtu.be/8omy0AqZ5cc

[survivorreelsmagicwithin]

Episode 5- “Good thing I bought a box of wine the other day.. I'm gonna need it.”-Jess

After Gryffindors tribal Raffy was voted out. This is either just bad news for Raffy specifically or for the Gryffindor tribe. I don't know how much what he's said and done as his tribe speaks to him, but I'm going to be stepping up my social game now to try and avoid a similar fate. https://am24.mediaite.com/tms/cnt/uploads/2015/07/Harry-Potter-Disgusted-Gif.gif 

 We are playing Mastermind this round and... I dunno what a good score is on this game ever. I always think I did well at it and then people blow me out of the water. I hope I did well enough that we avoid another tribal, but I have my own personal doubts. I explored the castle today. I went behind some barrels. I guess since I'm technically sorted into Gryffindor that I didn't know what the barrels are - I went behind them and found the Hufflepuff common room where I talked to Professor Sprout's flowers... They told me that Hagrid has a new dog. Either Hagrid is in the Forbidden Forest or these flowers are liars. I've been to Hagrid's Hut and interacted with each thing he owns. I saw no dog. https://dontyoushushme.files.wordpress.com/2015/11/tumblr_lp98471uss1qa8ir9o1_r1_500.gif

Mastermind is one of my very favorite comps so if someone causes us to go to tribal during this challenge I'm going to be VERY upset!! 

37 minutes later

If these people really think I'm going to rocks they have lost their minds. 

So I flopped the challenge and will probably have my name thrown out as an option so... PARTY! However, I decided to play the "omg I fucked up feel bad for me" card so maybe that'll either make people feel bad for me...or they'll make me a target. I kind of want people to feel bad for me? but also like I think people know I'm going through a rough time right now so if they vote me out they are going to hell xoxoxox But I'm gonna try and put in the werk to make sure I DON'T GET VOTES.. How may you ask? I think the key is Owen? I know Owen is a VERY social player and on a tribe like this I think having great social skills really can propel you into the top ranks. So I've decided to give Owen some "spell guesses" to help build some sort of trust moving forward.... will this help? probably not.... BUT right now.........the only kind of currency I have in this game is information (which I have none of because.. well new tribe...) and my guesses. Hopefully he feeds into my bullshit and sees that I do actually want to work with him (for now). So the goal is simple, I want people to think I'm NOT DISPOSABLE. People in games are selfish, they want to know what you CAN DO FOR THEM and I plan on doing just that. I also fucked around and shared guesses with Juls. She gave me a clue and I for the LOVE OF ME CAN NOT FIND THIS CRITTER. I thought it was that stupid Harry Potter spider but he told me to fuck off.. idk I'M SO STRESSED. Good thing I bought a box of wine the other day.. I'm gonna need it.

3 minutes later

PS: Landen is either playing too hard too fast or... he has my back? IDK. He's basically naming me as 1 of 4 people he doesn't want to go.. and we... we've spoken like twice. No game talk, nothing. We talked about MILK. How the fuck does he want me safe and not to go? IDK it seems fishy but I'll take it. Maybe he's just promising everyone safety right now and that's his game? I literally don't care. I will take whatever I get at this point. I want Max out. I've decided he really annoys me and I can't work with someone who thinks "penis" is a funny joke. I have nothing in common with him and... from the sounds of it something was "off" with him on his old tribe so... maybe just maybe..  that's something I can WORK WITH. Fucking weebz.

Oh my god, thank god we won! I do not want to have to deal with another tribal. For a unanimous vote, our tribal sure was messy. I think my position so far in this game is super solid, I'm in a great position with Nick and Kevin because we talk a lot and I have formed really strong relationships with both of them. My postion with Dan is honestly fantastic, I know he trusts me because he told me about his advantage in the game (a vote steal). Jules and I are good, we honestly just like each other and she was the first person to tell me that Miguel was throwing my name around. She also knows about Dan's advantage. I'm a little worried about her though because each tribal we have gone to she has gotten a vote, plus she started drama with Raffy before she left. I still think she is super sweet, but I'm worried that her confrontational personality is going to get her voted out and I'm not sure that there is much I can do about it. 

I'm going to mess around and get voted out, I have such a big mouth, y'all.  SO FAR TODAY, I have told Chips I didn't hear his name... then fifteen minutes later I DID hear his name.  Next I told Jess I heard Chips's name thinking she came up with it and she said it was news to her LSJFLDSJF.  Then I told Juls that I didn't hear anything... to which her and Jess are probably comparing notes.  I showed Lily all the places I've looked for the idol and last but not least I TOLD OWEN ABOUT THE OG HUFFLEPUFF ALLIANCE.  I AM GOING TO GET VOTED OUT, WHY DO I HAVE SUCH A BIG MOUTH????? SOMEONE HELP ME. 

hufflepuffle LOST immunity! that is so not the marshmallow move i was trying to make :/ over the course of the game, i've really bonded with lily, so i think that is going to be my close alliance here, obviously aside from juls, who i knew pre-game and we are just good friends. i do think juls would backstab me if she had to, so i'll keep my eye out for her, even tho id most likely die for her. *bleeds out* well when we got to this lil ol tribe, max made the bold move to instantly create a hufflepuffle group chat and declare how we are #HUFFSTRONG. i made the stupid decision to not trust my gut instinct on ruthie's distant responses, and now i am paying the price for that, because as far as i've heard ruthie is telling people hufflepuff is tight and is trying to blindside max, leaving me in the dark. i'm honestly less upset at the target on max, and more upset that she is trying to leave me (and pooossibly lily? cant be sure.) in the dark. I'm a little bit annoyed with it. like, we openly discussed voting about max on the original hufflepuff. i get that circumstances change, but there's no reason to leave me blind. i understand it from owen, jess, chips, but... why from ruthie lol? we've talked about it before and it's just like. bleh. that's my bad, for not talking to ruthie more on a personal level before and after the swap. i can be slow to make official alliances and cement my bonds in survivor, it's a strategy that's risky in the short term but pays off dividends in the long term when people really like AND trust you. that emotion is somethin necessary! it works its own kind of ~Magic~ so to speak. but right now it's definitely showing its weaknesses with ruthie trying to play me and my quietness with chips/owen/jess biting me in the butt a bit because they don't trust me. T_T i will have to work to prove i am a trustworthy ally for them, but in the meantime, as long as i can survive this vote (lol that means i am going home) then i'm fine and it's whatever. i want to try to think of a better wham line to close out this confessional, but i can't, so it's just going to kind of wither off and die here, as this sentence stumbles along on its meager way to find SOME version of sufficient punctuation to the topic, punctuated by actual punctuation.

this vote is gonna be.. como se dice.. interesting. working with max and landen while now being added to an alliance with owen, jess and chips um. smiles. it’s gonna be smth! but it seems like max is the target for this round which sucks but, i’d rather go with majority and help push that than make myself a target for wanting go against the odds.. idk if that made sense LMAO. but i’m just stressed! i love max so much but.. i wanna keep the people who weren’t on the og hufflepuff tribe close as opposed to letting them go so easily. 

THE WAY I HAD ONE OF THE LOWEST SCORES IN MASTERMIND https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f_Maspo1z34

Well here we are forced to actually play the game. And well.......this vote is crazy. I should have honestly anticipated this craziness but the craziness has been thrust upon us. Sincerely really enjoy everyone on this tribe. This meant that whatever decision I made on who to vote out would be strictly strategic. I know I can't vote out anyone from original hufflepuff because that inherently puts all of the original hufflepuff in danger of being easy targets in any future votes. I can't even in my brain consider voting out one of them at this vote because of this. I feel great about my social game rn. Several people are interested in working with me to my face and apparently in passing to others. This means that I'm unlikely to be a target for a vote but this could honestly all change after this. I feel the most trust and loyalty to Ruthie and Landen and I also feel like Max really has my back even though we haven't explicitly said this to each other. I also feel good about Jess. She told me today that she doesn't care too much as long as it isn't me or her and that semed honest to me? This leaves Juls, Owen, and Chips. Juls seems wishy-washy but I can tell she wants to vote Max but is nervous to say that to me. She is a newer player so this makes sense. I can tell that Landen doesn't want to vote Juls but no one really does so she doesn't make sense as the target. Chips has always been a good ally to me in the past but the past few games we have played together we have trouble being honest on what we want to happen.I want to work with Chips and don't want to see him go on this vote. I don't think he is as big of a threat at this stage of the game as Owen. Owen is one of the smartest people I've played with he has one of the best social games I've seen. He has a way of getting people on his side. I know he is thinking about a lot and knows that Max going right now is what is best for him. I want to trust owen and work with owen but my gut says that isn't what is going to work this time. Ruthie told us (Landen and I) about how they made a final 2 before the game even started (before we were told not to talk in the Great Hall chat in PMs) and now she is clearly backing out of that. Right now OG huffs are planning to vote Owen out. I think this is the best strategic play for us but will anyone else see it? Or will people be hyper focused on voting an OG huff that they would prefer to go to a rock draw than vote Owen. I'm not sure and I don't think I'm mentally prepared for what is about to go down. I'm hoping Jess, Chips, or Juls would be willing. But I'm also nervous not telling any of them about the vote could be the actual mistake we are making. Should I put my trust in Jess or Chips and see if they would vote Owen? I DON'T KNOW. Do I sound like I know what I'm doing??? NO. Am I attemping to make money moves??? YES. Is it the right decision????? PROBABLY NOT. But....we shall see. We shall see. 

Kind of happy we lost because this will be an interesting one for sure... As I said before, we have 4 hufflepuff and 4 non-hufflepuff on our tribe, and I wanted to jump on that IMMEDIATELY, so the second I heard Hufflepuff had a group chat (thanks ruthie hehe) I made one with Chips, Juls, and Jess. Jess and Juls are my gorls in this game, and I'm glad I finally get to make stuff happen with them. I want Ruthie to trust me (she messaged me for a final 2 literally night one before we found out we couldnt pm each other in the great hall), and I do really love her - but since we're on different "sides" of the tribe, I wanted to play smart. I originally threw out both Chips AND Max names, to make it seem like old tribal lines mean nothing to me, but then today I've been telling Ruthie and Landen I'm leaning way more towards Max beacuse he hasnt talked to me and Chips has, which is true. Ruthie seems to agree that Max should go - she told me he did some qweird stuff like pranks and things on their old tribe, and Landen said that Max would've been first boot. So it seems easy enough?? But then.... here comes Lily, with her own brain and stuff. Why can't people stop having opinions and just do what  I say??? I can tell Lily wants to keep Max, which makes sense. She probably wants to keep the Hufflepuff security in numbers. But I'm not writing Chips down, period, and they all know it. No matter what happens, as long as it is Max or Chips I'm fine. I'm just using this vote to have as many conversations with Lily, Ruthie, Landen, Jess, and Juls about game as possible to further myself, and I don't much care who leaves as long as it isn't me Jess or Juls. But I do think for the hell of it I'd go to rocks if I had to - bc if they're going to ROCKS for Max?? I sure as hell don't want to be outnumbered. Hopefully ruthie is being honest in wanting max gone and can change lily's mind.

https://youtu.be/TBrNjh2DnU4

SO my big mouth strikes again.   Landen came to me earlier and OWEN SPILLED ABOUT ME SPILLING ABOUT THE HUFFLEPUFF ALLIANCE.  I WAS SO MAD.  Mad enough to agree to voting him out and now I just feel guilty.  Jess, Juls, Owen and Chips don't know that there is going to be a tie tonight after all.  We feel like if we vote Owen that we can get Chips to vote with us in the revote and I hope that is the case because I REALLY don't want to go to rocks. Part of me thinks I should call Owen out on him spilling the alliance secret to him and try to fix things but I'm still very salty about it. I'm so sad and I feel so guilty but...  HE COMPLETELY MESSED MY GAME UP AND I TRUSTED HIM! 

So it has been a day. That's for sure. Got in my first alliance of people who didnt start Hufflepuff. Found out from two out of three Hufflepuffs my name was thrown out. May be leaving or at the very least the subject of a tie vote. If the target Max has an idol I leave guaranteed. I hope not. 

I am a horrible person. My heart is pounding so hard, this move is either going to make or break my game. :(

I would like to publicly thank Hufflepuff for extending my life in the game by another round- much obliged. Not sure how much of a difference it’ll make in the end lmao but nonetheless I’m still technically alive. Either this is the quietest game I’ve ever been apart of or everyone is definitely working together and I’m on the bottom. I know Kevin isn’t in on it but that Raffy vote was suspicious and you can’t tell me otherwise. Because how am I talking to everyone all day long but I don’t find out the vote is Raffy until 2 hours before the vote and that’s “what everyone is doing”? Not to mention it came from Jules, not Dan or Nicholas aka the people I thought I had a halfway decent relationship with. So the only way you can explain how I’m the last to know even though they were several opportunities for like 5 different people to tell me is that those 5 are working together. So basically I’m praying Hufflepuff can take one more L after tonight because if not, there’s a high chance I’m gonna have to beg for my life. And I’m not above it! But I also can do the math and I don’t know if Slytherin is smart enough to realize they’re handing the game over to Ravenclaw. Who knows though- maybe Jess or Juls will go home on the other side and that will strengthen my plea of attack Ravenclaw while we still can. Cause there’s 9 Huffleclaw left and 6 of Slytherdor so I’m like... we can’t all be the cute swing vote at merge that gets picked up to be a number but hey what do I know 

[survivorreelsmagicwithin]

Episode 4(SWAP)- “I'm happy if anyone goes but these bitches' mouths are sealed”-Raffy

I prayed for a swap... and now I'm regretting it. Honestly, kind of got tribe swap fucked. There are 4 original tribe members and then... me and Owen ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE FROM OUR ORIGINAL HOUSES. So... the odds are NOT in our favour. Hopefully maybe we link up with Juls and Chips and potentially set ourselves down as a four.. but also maybe that four isn't tight and I can wiggle these hips into a majority somehow. Straight off the jump you can tell that Landen/Matt are probably close. They have the same interests, same age, and both don't shut up so.. I can see it. I've played with Lily in the past and she's lovely. We weren't exactly very close and she got robbed by a twist but.... hopefully we can try and pick up where we left off. Chips is... lacklustre. I know when I hosted him he was a busy man.. so maybe it is different here. I AM ALSO OBSESSED WITH JULS. So hopefully she's just as obsessed with me and we can work together but I do see similarities in our games and she's someone who when I saw cast reveal I instantly knew I wanted to work with. Honestly, I know the odds might be stacked against me but.. I'm gonna work harder than a hooker on a busy night to get everyone here to love me and keep me around. PS: I miss Jacob ALREADY.

heyoooo WE MADE IT TO A SWAP!!! so basically hufflepuff was the last in-tact tribe standing, meaning we had all 5 players remaining while slytherin had 3 and gryff/raven had 4, meaning a swap right now COULD work well in our favor, and it did, except for meeeeeeeee my ENTIRE tribe (with the exception of me) got to STAY on hufflepuff, meaning I am alone but not only am I alone, every other person on new gryffindor still has someone from their original tribe and the split is 3-2-2-1, so no one tribe has a majority that overpowers the tribe as a whole since theres 8 people, but I don't have someone to fall back on as much as they might because they all have someone in a similar situation as them. HOWEVER, I did get swapped onto a tribe with jacob and jules who are two REALLY good friends of mine, I have known jacob for like 5+ years, and jules and I were a final 2 actually jacob's big brother series (sry we voted you out again sammy :c) so i am hoping i can find solace in them and maybe their relationships can also become my relationships? but its still scary to be the only person of your og tribe because just by process of elimination you could be easy pickings, so come tomorrow, as its still the night of the swap and most everyone just went straight to bed, i need to get boots on and work some social magic. But i wanted to make this confessional to give my first impressions of how i feel about my new tribe mates! we'll just go in alphabetical order autumn - she seems really cool, she turned it out in selfie scavenger hunt for her tribe which was awesome and hopefully we as a tribe can winning due in part to her dedication, all i know about her is that she played crossroads with jake p who i know and that she WON i think she's fairly well known in the community and its partially if not mostly for her good gameplay? she strikes me as the quieter but more strategic type, shes not gonna make big huge moves but shes gonna set herself up perfectly to make those undetectable moves that no one really sees and then she gets to the end and you think what did she do?? and then you realize when she blows you out of the water with her utr gameplay, but also who knows dan - DAN!! me and him played ts manhattan beach together, which was... a time, we were not really on the same side i believe we voted together a few times and worked together for the sake of making a move but neither of us were ever in the others inner circle until the back to back rounds where WE WENT OUT!!! i voted with him as the only person to do so when he left at final 7, which i dont think he believed in the moment but has since realized thank goodness, but i wanted him to stay in that game and maybe voting with him even tho it got me 6th right after and us ending on a good note actually was a good thing? what i know about him is, he is SMART, but i think he lets it show a little much, he seems passionate and very into the game and when things dont go his way i think he struggles to see the logic outside of his own, which makes sense the guy is really smart im sure if he believes something is wrong he has a reason to but it can make working with him unless your undyingly loyal to him a piece of work. if my memory serves me correctly i believe i tried to pull some fast ones on him in mb, where i lied and voted differently or maybe blindsided him a few times and then tried to damage control that and it caused distrust when the time came and i WAS being honest. so my gameplan now is if i end up wanting or needing to work with him (the jury is still out on that one as its like 2 minutes into the swap) but if i do work with him i want to be as upfront as possible and i want him on my good side at all times, like i said he's passionate so he has a FIERY side and i dont wanna be on the receiving end of it. joanna - me and joanna played tashirojima together and..... i may have blindsided her a couple times too.. maybe this is a wake up call for me, BUT ANYWAYS, we played together and we're aligned but i was playing the middle and then i chose the other side and she tried to vote me out and then i worked with her again and then i turned on her again and then i made final 3 and then she voted for me.. so now that we're all caught up, she's a good player, she is very smart and extraordinarily strategic AND loyal, but i dont think she takes to dishonesty very well, not personally but just in the game, i think she sees a clear smart and she'll do what she needs to make that move happen and she's fairly good at it from what i've seen and heard. My other point with her as opposed to dan, we played but ended up on different terms, i voted her out and then she voted me to win, so i think we're fairly informed on how the other plays and that could work against me BECAUSE I WAS SO FLIP FLOPPY IN TASHIROJIMA but hopefully i can bandaid it up and say oh i've changed im tired of stressing every vote i just wanna be loyal find a group and play out with the people i trust yadayadayada which i DO maybe not RIGHT NOW but i do!! anyways im getting away from my point, she's smart, i'm smart (kinda?) it will either bring us together or drive us apart its all reliant on how she feels, personally i would like to work with her bc i do want to be loyal but i want to be in a group that is also LOYAL and also WORKS, i dont wanna jump on just ANY ship, i want to be on the BEST ship, the one that's gonna sink LAST, when all the other ships are capsized and fully submerged. so we'll see how that goes nicholas - i do not know nicholas much at all, i haven't heard anything about him before this game nor during this game, he seems really fun and nice though, i appreciated his intro video it was chill, as for how he plays i have no information on that but i think him and jacob worked together or at least got to know each other so maybe i can get some info on him from jacob we shall see...... raffy - similarly to nicholas i do not know the guy unfortunately, i got a tidbit of info from an unnamed dr guest who was not fond of him, not a very good start BUT i am not going to let that influence me, im still going to go in with an open mind when i talk to him tomorrow and hopefully i have a different opinion and he's really cool! but yet again we shall see as for jacob and jules who i mentioned above i wanna touch on them a little bit because the dynamics there are much more complex, 1. jules is my number 1 in this game, i adore them, i love them, i will do anything for them, BUT thats how i played candyland and jacob HOSTED THAT, he knows how we played individually AND TOGETHER, but more importantly, he knows how CLOSE we are, and if you wanna hurt one of us you take the other out, i dont know if he would DO THAT but he might which leads me to my 2nd point... 2. i have voted jacob out of like every game we have played together lol. BUT I NEVER WANT TO !!!! i love jacob, he's wild and polarizing but he's a good friend just a good person all around but when he plays he can be emotional and in tashirojima i made a move against his number 1 and i didnt want it to divide us but it did because he wouldn't talk to me, so when i had planned to wiggle back in with him he didn't allow me to and i had to vote him out for it sadly, and then in 2020 our last game together, he was practically dead in the water and did himself no favors with how he handled situations with sammy so while i would have voted with him if it meant saving him (sorry sammy) that was not on the table so i had to vote him out, and it literally sucks EVERY TIME, because i love jacob but him in games always puts me in those positions and i hate it, and i told myself i dont wanna do him dirty, well i never WANT to do him dirty, but im going to try and actually avoid a situation that puts me between a rock and a hard place one of which being having to vote him out. but yeah so while i trust those 2 there's some things that could come out of the woodwork that may not be good for him but hopefully i can prevent those or get around them. its not very long into this swap so i may be overthinking and being paranoid but aha ha haha .. ha haa. *raven symone voice* YEP! THATS ME! ok anyways i could be very off in this "assessment" if you wanna call it that but i was bored and its 3 am so i wanted to confess, here's to making it to a swap!! WOOOOOO

OWEN AND I ARE FINALLY ON THE SAME TRIBE, YAY!!! I'm really sad that Kevin is now on a different tribe and all alone but hopefully he can work his way into a good alliance or something.  That would be a really hard spot to be in.  Also when I play these things I'm bad about just talking to a handful of people and not talking at all to others but I am being VERY SOCIAL this came I messaged the people that hadn't messaged me already and I want to keep up a conversation with everyone, I NEED to keep my social game strong and start thinking about endgame.  

so the tribes swapped last night and before you ask, YES i was blessed, YES i got the right house. i was sorted onto hufflepuff as i deserve, because we are the best house, and i got 4 pretty cool new people on my tribe. oh i also happened to get 3 other hufflepuffs which is great for me because it means i am in the majority :D that was such a marshmallow move, and now i don't have to worry all too much about going HARD on social play or anything like that i can just sort of chill, remain a UTR threat, make new pals, and stay on the right side of things via being in the hufflepuff majority. i'm also well positioned here i think as i have max and juls in sort of weeb trio, but ruthie/lily/myself had a sort of agreement max would go if puff lost. on top of that jess seems really funny and i think we'll get along, i might have a harder time with chips and owen but we'll see because they seem nice. (just not sure if they're people i'd personally bond close with, but that may just be because they're newer to me! it's all a mystery!) i'm also obviously very tight with juls, i love her a lot and we were close in 2020 and will continue to be close here! she is the definition of the word legend and i would throw my own game away for her, yes i would. i already have and i'll DO IT AGAIN! overall this is a tribe of really strong competitors and i can't wait to keep making marshmallow moves, *badgerin* the gryffindors, and ignoring the ridiculous idol hunt that's probably going on COMPLETELY while i vibe.

I really like my new tribe. It feels like a good, diverse cast of OG tribes. I think I might lean towards aligning with those in Ravenclaw because they will have the numbers with only two. Autumn and I can be those 2. I am so glad to have Autumn with me as well. She will easily help the most out in any challenge. Also, I feel like I can trust Dan, but I am going to hesitate for now. 

So this swap was pretty okay? I would have preferred Owen over Joanna hands down, but having 3 people from the OG Ravenclaw is kinda cute.  My plan is to really focus on building relationships with the people outside of the OG Ravenclaw, specifically with Kevin and either Jacob or Nicholas. I have played with Autumn before and she gets top 5 without even trying, so she is definitely on my radar of someone to try to get out before the merge. She is a great player and I would prefer to not have to fight against her for a better resume at the end. Also, on top of my idol, I found a risk/reward kind of thing that I will likely only tell Jules about. I want to drive home the point that me, owen, and her are my end game people. I am worried that Jules is close with Jacob irl and in this game because I don't want to risk her spilling the beans. I might think on that plan a little more before I put it into action, but honestly I probably will tell her. The power is only activated if I am willing to lose my vote at a tribal council.  Honestly if we lose this comp, I might need my vote just to establish trust with people, so if I'm able to save it until the merge and then lose my vote when I have individual immunity, that would be ideal. Gotta check on the rules for it though. 

It’s been a while since I’ve given an update and a lot has happened. I’m not sure if this is a blessing or a curse, but I managed to make it on a tribe with 4 original Hufflepuffs. Insane to say the least. Immedietly I felt very relieved. It’s nice to know that the people I’ve gotten to know and built some level of trust with during the first tribe would continue with me for the tribe swap...but idk. It could be a disadvantage in the long run by people associating our loyalty to one another. But I’m hoping the positive relationships I built with this tribe and in the great hall would take the target off of me if I can make it to merge. The odds of that feel good since I’ve been able to avoid tribal for this long, but I’m scared that the first tribal I attend sends me home. I really do like our new tribe but so far I’ve really only had good thin to say about this cast! People have positive attitudes even in such tough times and literally everyone is hilarious! I find myself laughing often! As far as who I can trust most, at this point it’s Ruthie. She is the only one who is deliberately said that she has my back. And I feel the same way. Hoping no one sees us as a power duo, but we shall see. I also think landen has been fairly honest with me about his opinions of the cast and that he hasn’t played with very many people. Throwback eep to when I told him I only know 2 people in the cast but it’s really 5! Ugh that’s gonna haunt me I can feel it when 3 out of the 5 people I know are now on our tribe. Eep! Any who, I’m really nervous for Kevin and hope he does well! I felt like we got along really well on the original tribes. With him being the only hufflepuff on the other tribe, I’m worried he is the easy target. Got my fingers crossed and hoping for the best. 

i do be lying doe.....i do be lyin......

2 minutes later

to leak or not to leak to joanna...that is the question...maybe i wait....i dont want them to think they can vote me!

14 minutes later

lemme take some time to praise the hosts and this game!!!!!!! cause i ain't doin confessionals enough LMAO!!!! wow the level of originality...the level of harry potter inclusion....the idol search... ugh its amazing i LOVE it, yall did an amazing job with putting in harry potter but not like TOO much that people who don't know it might get overwhelmed? also yall are just a joy to talk to in my confessional!!! love this, never been so into a survivor game -- this is literally the first game where i've remembered to idol search EVERY day (well, almost EVERY day but STILL!!!) and idk. im so glad i'm playing this!! idc what placement i get as long as i make it to merge!!! thank you hosts!!

I am kind of disappointed on how things turned out for the challenge. I really didn't want to have to go to tribal especially because I do not think that I have established myself well on this tribe. However, I did a good job on the challenge so I hope I can stay for it. No one has been saying a name. Autumn did mention that one of the J's should leave. I think it should be Jules because she did so bad in the challenge. Well, either way, I'm happy if anyone goes but these bitches' mouths are sealed

Winning feels SO GOOD! I really like my tribe. Everyone has been kind of quiet. Surprisingly even with Owen here I talk to lily more and she is currently my strongest connection in the game. I’m not sure if it is going to stay that way but I kind of hope it does! We’ll see what happens haha

Everything was super quiet and then everything started happening all at once. Now I'm in three different alliance chats and nothing seems super solid. All I've heard if Raffy or Autumn and I'm guess Raffy is going? I don't want to vote anyone out, I like everyone, but I'm not aligned with Raffy and I don't want it to be me, so I'm going where the numbers are going I think. 

Entering this tribe swap, I had definite concerns as Jacob and I were in a minority position by default. However, somehow Kevin was in a minority of one, so I capitalized upon that and reached out to him! Granted, he was someone I enjoyed speaking to from the start, so minority position or not, I wanted to align. Secondly, I reached out to Joanna. She and I immediately hit it off, and if the vibes and aura I am getting from her is true, I think she’ll be incredibly loyal and fun as a ally! Dan, Autumn, Raffy, And Jules have all reached out to me as well. Dan is someone I have enjoyed conversations with for sure, but I do not see myself necessarily staying diehard loyal. I actually adored Autumn and I’s conversation, but I have to be wary of them! They are strong in competitions, and I do not want that. It’s pretty humorous that I think removing challenge threats means I’ll be able to win more challenges, because I suck. Jules and Raffy are who I vibe with the least, but I also remember Jules screwing me over in the ETC mini, when she played into the Hive Mind and basically allowed me to be targeted simply for being an outsider. I am not going to target her simply for that reason, I believe in forgiving the past and leaving games behind, but I do not trust her so far. Personality-wise, we get along! I decided to form the 4our alliance of Kevin, Joanna, Jacob, and Myself. I believe this will be a loyal core to what could be a stellar alliance! I suggested Raffy and Autumn, so I am hoping Raffy ends up being the plan, which seems likely. In the future, I would like to target Autumn-Jules-Dan in that order, although I am open to switching the order. I do think I have some level of control strategically and socially over this tribe, but I cannot get cocky! I have to be humble and take the journey one step at a time. Raffy, in a game of social connections, just like our puzzle, you cannot slide by without talking to others. My vote is for you. x nick

Whew! I made it to the tribe swap!! And I'm a Hufflepuff now! My ACTUAL house! Don't have to spy anymore. https://media1.giphy.com/media/LsKyE4J9PGjIc/source.gif

 Anyway - the people featured on my original tribe are: Me & Juls Cool. She's already been open with me about who she wanted to vote off from the previous tribe so I think we can work together still. From the previous Ravenclaw tribe: Owen Um... boo? I don't know, honestly. He just NEVER has or ever wanted to work with me or even really speak to me in any ORG we have ever played. I would like for this to change and will try but yeah I don't know. From the previous Slytherin tribe: Jess Yay! I wanted a chance to play a game with her. I hear she's cracked out of her mind almost all of the time in games. I am here for it! I hope I don't ruin our game relationship by saying too much or the wrong thing! From the previous (and still on) Hufflepuff tribe: Lily, Ruthie, Landen, Max Yay to pretty much all of these. The fact that they all self-identified as Hufflepuffs means that they are my people! I want to pal with all of them. Anyway, as far as game stuff goes Jess asks me how I feel about the game and I tell her that it's been alright and that our first vote was someone who asked to go and that we haven't really been playing this game. Then I said I hope we don't go to tribal because I think I like pretty much everyone. https://media0.giphy.com/media/5tlq0pRndGu8U/source.gif 

Then I made a huge faux pas... I said that if we went to tribal hopefully someone who was original Hufflepuff would go. And gave no context. So I guess I gave her bullets to have me killed at a future tribal if it's a "anyone but me" situation. Our challenge was not for reward. We had to do a bunch of puzzles. I suck at jigsaw so I decided to do slide puzzles. I have no mouse and apparently not having one slows me down exponentially. I did the worst at my puzzle. Our tribes tied. We won tie breaker because EVERYONE ELSE is good at puzzles! Final topic. Idol hunt. Still a fail. Went to the lake. The selkie would not speak with me. I think we're in love. https://media2.giphy.com/media/oBfiN3ZSuUEdq/source.gif

I guess I will vote Jacob if Autumn wants to lol

hi it’s me nichole.. um. smiles. i don’t really know what to say um.. we won! woohoo! another melodrama victory, i’m hoping everyone likes me as much as i’m thinking because :flushed: yes she has a social game.. yes she’s thriving.. i cant get anything in the castle so that’s cute. only hints but is that shit gonna click? No. 

hi!!!! so we lost sadly. i did rly rly good on the maze so im proud of myself. tribal seems to be easy enough as we were deciding between raffy and autumn but then raffy decided to throw my name out so i think he's going unanimously now. ill be getting a vote which is cute but idc. once hes gone i defff want autumn out bc im in an alliance with everyone but her and dan but at least dan pms me a good bit!

HERE'S THE GOSSIP - I'm so happy we swapped! I would've been heartbroken if we lost and I had to vote out another Ravenclaw, so this is best case scenario. On first glance tho i look mega swapfucked.... all three of prior tribe members separated from me? But honestly, I think that puts me in a better position. Not only can I make new connections, but I won't be targeted for being a block of three. PLUS? I LOVE being on a tribe with Juls, Lily, Jess, Ruthie.... I'm truly THRIVING rn!!!!!!!!!!!!! Chips hasn't talked to me much. Max is okay but seems kind of fuckin crackt. And I like Landen a lot so far! So we're in a good spot. And a puzzle??? whew, this was my week xo Praying my Ravenclaw babies are okay, and I'm going to work on building maybe a counter-Hufflepuff alliance with Juls Chips and Jess if we lose!

ok I only have 5 minutes to write this so we will fully get into the tea later but to recap: 1. God gave me Kevin because He knew what was about to come next 2. the kids are all voting Raffy and only Jules had the heart to tell me 3. I too am voting Raffy because I don't have time to be on the bottom of the tribe and I think there's some fuckery going on 4. all HELL is breaking loose in the tribe chat 5. I got caught in a lie so I've already had to start an apology tour 6. I still have a headache lmao There is so much that needs to be said but all I'm gonna say is Raffy giving me a good laugh helps our goodbye be less bitter. He is genuinely great, was really understanding about it all (and me having to think long term instead of being loyal) and I want better for him. I also want better for myself since my own tribe has been usurped from me? but I digress. Raffy needed to pop off cause they lied to him and me the entire day so what did you expect. I have a lot of his mess to clean up now but hey I have time on my hands. Long live Raffy I will try to do right by you

[survivorreelsmagicwithin]

Episode 3- “Y'all wanted magic within and we delivered- case closed”-Autumn

Another super fun challenge! I want to shout out to the hosts for just doing a great job so far. This is making this quarantine just a little less terrible. So happy we have immunity and getting our first reward is so exciting! I’ve been trying my best to connect with members outside of my tribe in the great hall chat and get close with my tribe mates. For the most part I really trust all of them. And that’s horribly scary. I really love being on hufflepuff. But I have a feeling a swap is gonna happen. Kevin told me he thinks it’s going to be 2 tribes of 8. We will see. GL to slytherin and ravenclaw! 

HOES MAD 

https://giphy.com/gifs/lifeminute-birthday-rihanna-3fihINg62RNynS9cbY 

I'm so dead and drained rn but I look forward to reading this round and seeing how heated people are over this. And this will definitely follow me the entire game but you know what I'm glad. Don't let the 16 month hiatus fool you: when I show up I show out. Everything is mind over matter in a way and y'all caught me on a good day so I was just like fuck it I'll do this all day if I have to. So I walked into that challenge at 11:30 am and deadass my phone never left my side... for 9 1/2 hours. Also y'all know I'm at my best when I'm an underdog? So of course I went all out, please tell me you didn't expect anything less. And can I just say Gryffindor legitimately and collectively earned that because everyone participated and put points up. So yes I am that girl but I do it for the squad because I know they'll do it for me. BIG ups though to Vi and Jess- I don't care what their alliances were before today they better have each other's backs and I'll riot if they don't both survive. Literally do the right thing and send a man home. And the same goes for Ravenclaw! I wanna know what's going on over there and I'm not picky but send a man or inactive home if you can. Let it be known that I literally came into this game to raise hell for Dan and Owen lmaaaaooo. I mean I don't want them to go (yet) because that's not what good frenemies do and where's the fun in that. We make each other's arcs better and if we're cast, there will be a fight to the death sooner or later. But until then! Yes I am absolutely living for them sweating it out for a full round. Can y'all believe it? They finally lost at something God is so good. Would've loved to make Hufflepuff sweat too but hey. There's always next round

https://thumbs.gfycat.com/UnsungOblongBlesbok-max-1mb.gif

14 minutes later

Also I just wanna say that 6:00 hour was chef's kiss. In my entire org career, I have never been on a tribe that pulled off a shutout like that and that was ICONIC. Hoes mad but did your entire tribe come together and get a streak of points nonstop for upwards of an hour?? No ma'am you did not. I kept us alive all day but that hour was THE hour that took Gryffindor from 4th to 2nd and that's how you win immunity. Y'all wanted magic within and we delivered- case closed

I don't trust Nick at all. I know in the back of his mind he's thinking i'm gonna play like our previous game which I wasn't exactly loyal to him because I was loyal to some bitch ass alliance that ended up... ANYWAYS. So he seems like the type of player to keep that into consideration because he happened recently and he's sort of a newer player. So I have to be mindful of this all and as much as i'm STRESSING the fact that obviously there were external factors in that game.. that won't impact this game kind of a deal. I know this all could just be my paranoid little brain and thinking that he's out to get me when he's not.. but I haven't played any back to back games in FOREVER and when something THAT FRESH happens.. it's hard for me to not have the after thought of: Wow Nick must think i'm an loyal person who won't tell him my real thoughts. 

 But Nick gonna be a scary player down the line. He's already in my pm's bragging about how him, Landen, and I think his name is Matt? idk one of the "Weebz" (still don't know what that means) and how he will have those potential relationships moving forward.. I just... don't.... understand..... him. ANYWAYS

 The thing is... I think? I can trust Jacob fully. I think this vote SHOULD BE EASY.. but I can't help but feel really fucking bad. Like terrible. Like extremely heart broken about voting out VI. She's put her all into everything and honestly I would be so mad if i've given my all and these two dweebz didn't even show up to the comp. I know she's gonna be upset and I hate knowing that. So i'm TRYING to take emotions out of this decision and make this all strategical and within the game environment because if I was voting with my HEART i'd keep her. BUT then I have that voice in the back of my head that is saying "But if you save Vi.... she'll be loyal to you!" BUT ALSO... I know from HOSTING VI... is that Vi is only loyal to... the fun she has. If she gets bored she fucks around. She's a crackhead. But I obviously can't VOICE THIS TO ANYONE because they could flip this and reverse this on ME. 

I'm scared that if I cast any form of doubt about the vote to Jacob he will relay the message to Nick and well I become more threatening than Vi at this point because I pointed the gun at him... SO I was fucking around with the idea of... using my idol on myself, causing a 2 to 2 tie.. and well.. unless Jacob wants to go to rocks by himself... and basically get voted out.. Mr. Nick goes. But it's LITERALLY FINAL 18............ If this was final 11, sure i'd do this in a heart beat... but this is such a bad bitch move i'm scared people will see I got something on my resumé already. They'll see I went against an alliance for VI. It's just so risky.. but I told myself i'd have FUN in this game.. I just don't want to make a move purely on a past game or purely on emotion. I want to be making moves that move me forward in the game..

I LOVE JOANNA!!! THIS IS A JOANNA APPRECIATION POST!!!!!! and dan has the idol. 

Unsurprisingly, we lost the challenge. I worked my lil booty off as best as I could (I did give up but that is beside the point at this current moment) and I have been friendly, fricking nice as all hell, and then Miguel wants to vote me out. And honey... I think that sealed your fate. I am working on being a little more ruthless I guess because I really want to win this game, so if you come for me, you bet I'm coming for you. I've always made jury and I don't think that this is the season I'm getting stuck with pre-jury. Miguel is the only relationship I don't feel confident in so... bye sis. 

The immunity challenge was a hard-fought battle, but we managed to pull out a win near the end. It was the most stressful time of my life. Honestly, I felt that if we lost then I would get voted out next. Thankfully, that did not happen. However, this is a huge wake up call for me to get my ass into gear and start being more social with my tribe. Otherwise, I might find myself in the bottom and that is not a position I want to be in.

AHHHH so my tribe won immunity and reward and things are great!  Someone mentioned yesterday (Kevin?? Maybe) that this means we are the last tribe to have to see tribal council and that is a GREAT THING!  I really wonder who is going to go home- I just hope it isn't Owen.  I also really hope he still wants to work with me if we end up on a tribe together. In other news, I'm curious to see if a swap is about to happen.  With a double tribal happening tonight it seems as though it would be a big maybe! Also I'm still irritated that my glee shirt didn't count as a band tee, when everyone asks what kind of music I like the first thing I always say is 'anything by the cast of glee' xD I don't feel like I was much help in the challenge but I was there and got points for wine and sequins if that means anything. 

doing this ON TIME.. anyways chile. WOO WE DID IT! finally not coming in last hehe. god the amount of i was just frantically running around my house.. well thank god my family didn’t question it for the most part hehe. overall this challenge was super duper fun and i’m HOPING we can continue to win some because the stress of my tribe wanting to go against me.. yea it’s there. hopefully my paranoia is just that and i have nothing to worry abt ✨

Hey all you cool cats and kittens! It’s Dan, not Carole Baskin, but with the same crackhead energy. So Miss Miguel should be leaving tonight! It’s not anything personal at all. He’s a really sweet guy, but he’s just not around. I work mad hours a week and still make time for this stuff. Joanna is worried because she knows her name is going around so as long as she doesn’t try to pull something, everything is good. I think the chances of that happening are slim to none honestly. I feel like had I been able to compete in the comp I could have helped way more than others. I have a ton of random shit in my apartment that was asked for!!! I was a little shady toward Jacob in the Great Hall chat so lettuce pray that he doesn’t act like a petty fool if we swap together. I am kinda anticipating a swap after this tribal but we’ll see!!! 

we won immunity and nothing has changed on my tribe for me since my last confessional woo consistency yay c:

im sad. we have to vote out vi which is so sad. i love her shes so sweet but i have suhc a tight bond with jess and nick that like there isnt another option. but ugh someone hold my hand

Darn, we were so close to winning, yet so far. Always remember, the unintentional matsing is just as mighty as the intentional, so 3 of us making swap or merge is much more advantageous than a unit of 4. I love my tribe, I do, and I genuinely feel I may be in danger! I trust Jess and Jacob though (JJJ: Jess, Jacob, Jay), so I’m hoping for another unanimous decision. (I will probably be asleep at tribal since I have 1 hour of sleep today)

So out tribe basically gave everything they could in a 12 hour challenge of Hell. I tried especially hard thinking I would be voted out if we lost because no one really talks "game" with me. I know that side seasons are 'Survivor Lite' but typically people at least talk game. I know I wasnt the target from last vote because everyone assured me they want to work with me and Josh said to vote him out in the tribe chat. Apparently though Josh wanted to do a blindside and reached out to Autumn to let her know asking me if he had asked me. So honestly Autumn is the truest! The other two notnvoting me inlobe seeing but if Josh talked to them then... hm Anyway I cant play a perfect game anymore :( Also I have officially dug through all of Hagrids things and he has no idol for me. I thought he might have something in could take and use somewhere else since he is a keeper of keys. But naw.

Guess who lost by two points!! Fricking Nicholas and Jacob leaving us for 7 hours. Then nick only showed up for the last 3ish but he didn’t even submit anything. Wth? We’re gonna try to kick him out.

i love my tribe so much we keep having more and more fun each time :D i definitely think after max's april fools prank i'm even more inclined to want to vote him if we lose, but i'm also grateful he's not really gone because mayhaps a weeb alliance in the future is possible.... !!! i also always utilize the great hall segments to make myself known and thought about even if people also think i'm a bit annoying, idc, the main thing is they remember me and when we meet on a swap or something i am one of the first they choose to talk to! it is always an important strategy of mine, people don't realize that in big games, one of the most crucial things you can do is leave a big first impression on people on the other tribes, you have the lucky opportunity to get some spaces where you meet them in ORGs unlike in the real world - USE it to let them form an idea of you in their head and decide they like you before they even meet you, it's a weird phenomena but i've found it's one of my most consistent strategies, when i actually decide to employ it (flashback to me being so lazy in 2020 i barely even used one world.. eep) hufflepuff is cute and we WILL be continuing to make marshmallow moves, until i get to make my own independent marshmallow moves to win

Soooo we finally lost a challenge kfjahsdj time to put this alliance to the test! The answer seemed pretty clear to me though - everyone kinda just wants to do Miguel. I feel bad, because I do think these competitions have NOT played to his strengths at all and I know he can be a great competitor. And I really wanted to get to know him again this time around. For a second, Dan and I considered saving him as a loyal number... but I just can't do that to Joanna, who has rlly busted her ass lately. So tonight it's a harder choice than it seems, but ultimately, I'm going with Miguel, and I told him that. I really wish he would've put more effort into our conversations before he was in trouble lmao. Also, DAN FOUND THE IDOL HEHEHEEH so that's great :) Glad to know he trusted me enough to tell me about it! I think he's probably going to be pretty loyal this time to me? And I feel like I have to give that same courtesy back to him. Someone will probably take one of us out eventually. I rlllly do not want to stress. If for some reason they blindside me tonight or Miguel has another idol or something, it has been fun <3

[survivorreelsmagicwithin]

Episode 2 - “Y'all. Vote me out fr cause I'm inactive as fronk” - Joshua (through Autumn)

I hate flag-making challenges. I will not be helpful at all, and I hope that someone else can take the reigns and lead us to victory. I honestly feel safe going into a tribal council, but I do not want to test that theory.

Next morning

With Chips and Jules working on the crest designs, I feel confident that we will do well in the challenge. Maybe not the best, but definitely not the worst. I still have the same anxious feeling that my tribe is not active enough for my taste, but I will just have to live with it for now. Besides, at least this is not immunity because that we increase my anxiety by so much. But, I keep forgetting to search the idol hunt which is my bad, but it is just so hard and long that I do not really feel like searching all the time lol

ART CHALLENGE <333 i love these challenges. Jess made my picture 110% better and its super cute. The note that she wrote with it is also hella cute and I love the whole HP aesthetics bc i never got to go to real hogwarts ;-; but i'm sure most of yall can related. The boys weren't too helpful but nick was better than jacob who is sick. Nick was way more active aka jacob said 3 sentences the entire challenge sooooo…. if we lose idk I might just save jacob anyways bc pregame relations.

Won reward, but now we have to win immunity again. I really hope that this reward helps us continue to survive. I don't want to have to vote anyone out. We've been getting first, but I really just want to survive this challenge, its known to be hard.

I think I have been stuck with the second most challenge inept tribe in the history of my ORG career. I literally said so many answers in my version of the story and Jules just fucked it up. And then they got the girl's name wrong. And then they started mixing up characters. I know I did well, but fuck these people. God. Now we need a tribe to get 0 which is very unlikely. I will just resign myself to tribal. I hope and pray that these people have some common sense and do not want to vote me out

Listen. Listen. Listen. I dang knew this story was going to be Harry Potter based. I knew in my brain and in my heart that I shouldn’t have been the one to start that thing. What do I do? Start the dang thing. Oh well. We did alright. I would be shocked if we won tho but if we don’t I’ll be relieved. I def don’t feel confident enough but I really had a lot of fun with my tribe. I really miss this and really hope that my time isn’t cut short! I feel really good about my tribe mates sincerely. And that’s kind of scary! I would hate to see any of us to go and how it’s going to affect the bond we have if we vote someone out. In this moment with Max sitting out, it may be him who goes if we go to tribal. I hope that isn’t the case. I’ve got my fingers crossed for us. Huff Puff strong!

Honestly Jules dropped the ball sis!! But it’s okay, I love her. She’s really nice and I know she tried her best. Plus she’s in an alliance with me and Owen, so we should have the numbers against Joanna or Miguel if we go to tribal. Personally, I’d prefer Joanna to go. She’s kinda domineering, but she’s also an asset in challenges thus far. She is organized and direct. I’ve also talked to her a bit more than Miguel, so I guess I don’t really care who goes.

I’m happy I didn’t fuck up the reward comp and the shit that I drew got us a win!

I really hope I don't bomb that challenge, I answered everything that Kevin talked to me about.... I think!  The rest of them tried very hard but I am SOOO glad that I asked to do my part at the end because my memory of repeating things is horrendous but I'm usually pretty good at bullshitting test answers... too bad I got some of the multiple choice stuff wrong.

I think that if we do lose I am still in a good spot on this tribe and hopefully I won't be in danger.  I feel like I'm on everyone's good side and Max kind of just disappeared so maybe we could just vote him out this round? Idk.

Hopefully we don't have to worry about it.  I smell a swap coming up pretty soon and I just hope I'm either with Owen or with some of the people from my tribe.  I have no idea if they know anyone or are close with anyone in the other houses.

I'm still feeling the closest to Lily and Kevin but I have been talking to Landen a good bit too these days so hopefully we'll be safe or we can all just agree on Max.

16 minutes later

OOOOOH IS LANDEN PAVING THE WAY FOR A MOVE TO SEND MAX PACKING???

He just told me that me, lily and kevin are precious angels that must be protected and that he likes Max when he's around too so that sounds like something... HMMM...

I can't get cocky, I always go home when I get cocky. But I like this.

my host chat saw this first (shout-out to Drewie and Dennis): Y’all I’m an idiot. I thought I only knew 2 people in this game (Owen and chips). Then I remembered I also know Jess, Autumn, and dan. Literally love and respect each of you my brain just don’t got the strongest memory no more. I’m so sorry!!!! I literally just told landen I only know 2 ppl. I’m just gonna try to not remember it happened.

Ugh.....I need to get it together.

I love my tribe talking to each other now that we have to!! Everyday I'm like damn either I'm on the bottom or I'm not the only one with piss poor social game. Ok so... the moment the hosts said we got 1 point, I started getting ready for tribal lmaaaooo. No sense crying over it either because all the tribes basically just had to show up in order to beat that

Like how could we not go to tribal with a score of ONE? That shit's embarrassing hahaha. That's like when your teacher passes the test back to everyone sitting around you but not you so you KNOW it's bad. But you know what? It's all good cause I'd rather us take the L now and get it out the way and we can all laugh about it cause losing won't be funny after long. The real question is: will Gryffindor do this the easy way or the hard way caaauusse we all know who the weakest link is. I just wanna see if someone puts two and two together without my prodding. Chips already said we voting together right and I'm like yes sir. There's no better place than being on the same page

WE WON OMG!! Jules basically gave me nothing, which is fine, i understand, but i'm so impressed that we pulled that off. Absolutely killing these reward challenges really helps!

"Y'all. Vote me out fr cause I'm inactive as fronk."

Tonight we learned Joshua is a feminist selfless man that I stan because he's volunteering to go home without me having to put his name out, which I was going to do. Like imagine if every guy had that kind of self-awareness, to recognize why he should be the vote and then embrace it instead of wreaking havoc. And wanting to see others succeed more than yourself? King shit! He knew when to hang it up and did just that. Like the number of times I've seen a vote get complicated for no fucking reason because everyone wants a fight to the death. Enough- I'm old, tired, and cannot exert too much energy at once. We got a long game ahead of us, not to mention quarantine. So from the bottom of my heart, thank you Joshua. We need more players like you and I appreciate your service

im back back BACK AGAIN with another confessional! not much has changed but a few updates for the sake of these being required :) 1. max has become even more inactive, he's not reached out to me personally since the first day and any time i messaged him after that he's sent me nothing back that i can build a convo off of, so we just have stopped speaking. Luckily this challenge only required four people and everyone else SHOWED UP!! or at least spoke about their availability, while he did not. However in his defense he said he was having some issues at home and i feel for him but his inability to connect has been an issue before he spoke about anything in our tribe chat with us. I'm trying to give him the benefit of the doubt but this point my relationships with the other 3 are leaps and bounds ahead of where I am at with Max. Maybe he can pick up some speed if we continue winning challenges but, it's not looking too hot. SPEAKING OF CHALLENGES, well first we lost reward AGAIN, but we won immunity.. AGAIN! thank goodness for not being first or second boot, i always love being able to avoid these early tribals and if i can get to a swap without seeing one that would be ideal, but also if we do go and maybe vote out max? wouldn't be the worst thing. Moral of the story we won and thats exciting! however.. if we didn't.. the first big push of strategic talk came up with landen when he hinted at being frustrated with max's lack of presence which I also share. I do believe if we lost me and landen could have most definitely picked up ruthie and lily to form a four against him, if he even came to tribal. That would be my ideal situation and if we continue on this tribes hopefully it gives me a nice cushion to fall on if we do lose so i dont have to entirely blow up my social game within the first few rounds by voting out someone i've built a connection with. If max can go and the remaining four hufflepuffs can make a swap I would feel good about that, and maybe in the right circumstances we could work together on the swapped tribes because i genuinely like all of these people (yes max too but in this specific scenario he wouldn't be included bc... well..) anyways to close this off i still absolutely ADORE lily, she is fun and our conversations are really good, and same goes for ruthie, hopefully i dont have to see either of them or myself go home before we can really start playing because i think we could do some damage. :) ok anyways this was longer than i thought it would be goodbye

I'm still not over the fact that I was able to answer 7 of those questions right. I have the memory of a plastic fork.  I also love that we are SAFE!

I do kind of hope things get spicy and we swap this round and become two tribes of 9. That'd be cute. I don't want VI to get bored and crack on me. BUT ALSO I think I have solid enough relationships with almost everyone on this tribe... so who knows?!

Also... these hoes really out here trying to search for an idol in PUBLIC. IN PUBLIC. WHAT ON EARTH IS GOING ON HERE?

Dear diary, seems like we keep winning challenges, which is great but tbh i feel like every time i give a disadvantage to my team because english is not my first Language, and so far its been a vocabulary test and a listening and speaking test. I mean I knew I signed up for school but damn. Give me some macarena  or drinking tequila challenge and I'll crush it

bippity boppity boo im back again with almost no content kdfasjhdskjfh

Ravenclaw working smarter and we keep winning, period!!! Thankful that y'all put Dan and I together....bc truly we will be unstoppable in these competitions. I kind of want to lose soon though to see how things would shake out, but I don't really have bad blood with anyone. Joanna seems passionate enough in the tribe chat and the challenges, even if she's dry in PMs. Miguel still won't give me anything other than a "how are you," but I hope the best for him in life lol

Still love Jules and Dan, and we made a three person alliance, but I haven't talked with either of them much one on one since it happened.... I really need to step the social game up eventually, but right now, I'm coasting, and maybe that's what I need before I find the time and resources in this game to strike!!

The idol hunt is hard but Dan seems onto something. Honestly he's gonna be a big threat sooner or later so he's sticking around as long as I can keep him! The last two games I've been in I've seen "goats" get dragged to the end and locked in final 3 positions, and then these perceived goats have ended up winning. so I want the big players in this game to rise to the top and fight it out in the end!

let’s say i am como we dice.. fed up with a lot :flushed: a lot meaning joshua starting to get on my nerves a bit! he’s genuinely sweet n all but.. the way he complained about us losing by putting down others work HHH pissed me off. which is why i will be voting him out hehe.. but so far my misting has worked because no one wants to vote me out! mwah

Slytherin killed the memory challenge. We thought we were all gonna flop bc all of us thought we sucked at memory stuff. um well we knocked it out of the park? Ravenclaw got 4 and huff/gryff got 1. We got 7 so oops. I do hope things turn out well for Gryffindor but no one I really know/care about is in that house so I'm not too worried. I hope they continue to lose or even hufflepuff since ravenclaw has 2 of my friends in it.

I have been TERRIBLE with confessionals but only because there's really not been much going on? I have an alliance with Dan and Owen, and even though I wrote off Joanna I was DEFINITELY wrong in doing that. Miguel is sort of the outlier. Our team is kinda iconic though? We've done so well on all the challenges. I might be the weakest link? More to come.

it's pretty sad but the whole tribe has agreed to vote max if we lose, basically he's just never around because of what's going on at home and like thats sad but... we gotta do what we gotta do *shrug*. I'm really feeling good about Hufflepuff moving forward, i've never bonded this much this easily with EVERYONE on a tribe and i just feel like if we keep winning or even if we lose and have to vote out max, we could be a great group for the future. especially i feel great about working with kevin, we dominated eve's game after eve came between us in 2020 that dastardly witch... :P (juuust kiddin. love ya!) but now we could totally do well in this game too i think.....

lily and ruthie are just so sweet and we really bond talking about pretty much anything,, especially lily is a great conversationalist and i just find it so natural to talk to them both. i'd love to work with any combination of people from hufflepuff in the future, hopefully i start sucking a little less at all these challenges. i think i did pretty great on memory :D

So here is the summary of what has happened since last time

We had a reward challenge that was drawing. Mine sucked. Apparently 3/4 so no reward.

We played Telephone. My team didnt realize that details are the most important parts of that and didnt share then with Autumn so Autumn didnt share them with me. Then I didnt know them when asked about them.

We scored 1 point and lost. Since I still have no alliance I'm scared that it could be me. So I kind of got an idea how everyone was feeling.

Juls let me know she wanted to vote Joshua and- it's not me so that's fine!

Then I was talking to Autumn about it and - OOP! Josh asked to be voted out. So unless he plays an idol I'm supposing he is leaving after asking to go.

woo my tribe won immunity!! we are safe! i’m glad bc i’m forming good relationships with ppl on my tribe. i think we all get along rly well so i hope we keep winning. the challenge was fun and i slayed bc i’m skinny mwah

Ya know what’s refreshing? Being on a tribe that actually wins!!! The last three games I’ve played I’ve been on flop ass starting tribes.

Now we’ll lose every challenge

10 minutes later

This sickening bitch just found a hidden immunity idol!!!! Good until f6 L A D I E S!!!!!!

HI BARBS SO I WAS GROUNDED SO I MISSED THE CHALLENGE BUT MY HUFFLEPUFF BABS SLAYED SM SO IM LIVING

CONFESSIONAL 2.1 —

Not much strategy has happened this episode, just simply tribal bonding! We are SlytherWINNING, getting reward and immunity this time! How wonderful.

Regarding my tribe mates, I love all three. I pray, pray, pray we make swap, i do Noh want to be a dirty bad guy and have to vote one out.. yet. Haha.

I was drunk during immunity, one full glass of rum & coke, so I am shocked that we won immunity. Honestly, I feel silly admitting I was drunk to my tribe because... if I can do that when drunk, imagine if I was sober. Competition Beast, duh.

I also gave up my run this round for the tribe to use. Was partially social, partially I just do not understand how to do the Hunt, so I might as well help the greater good. Either way, it comes off positively.

Hoping for a smooth journey for a little longer!

x nick

Joshue has basically quit at this point so I have no fear going into tribal

[survivorreelsmagicwithin]

Episode 1B - “I'm praying to Yoncé I survive and don't get first boot.”-Jess

no words.

LITERALLY

NO WORDS.

Two points. TWO FUCKING POINTS.

I'm praying to Yoncé I survive and don't get first foot. That ain't a cute look xoxox

i'm already forgetting to search for the idols, i'm already getting paranoid about if i need to start making alliances instead of just enjoying the really cute convos i'm having with ruthie lily and kevin (max is kinda dry and annoying but... we'll try to make it work ig).... and i'm already hating every challenge we do especially this one although i actually really liked the challenge it was so creative and fun, i just hated that i have bad luck and am stupid with the deduction things, HENCE why i havent looked for the idol yet. LOL. so.... tl;dr - things are going perfectly! this hufflepuffle is workin exactly as he should!

I just wanna say we really are the hufflepuffs. 114 moves in like 5 hours, but we did it.  Really proud of Ruthie, Landen, Kevin, Max, and I! Sending positive vibes to slytherin. Hope they are okay in this madness.

Yo my tribe? Kinda dope. I think that everyone worked really well together today! I think Joanna kinda took the lead and some of her ideas were... a choice. But! It got us first place! I think that this tribe has a good shot of getting to swap unscathed.

With Slytherin going to tribal, I really hope that someone I don’t know goes, but at the same time I’d be okay with Jess going? I feel like she’s such a sleeper threat in most games I’m in with her and I really just don’t want to compete with that this time around.

I kind of snapped and got myself an idol good until final 6 teehee.

I knew that the Snape's letter or writing or whatever that freak was up to was SOMETHING. Did I get lucky... hell fucking yeah.

A crackhead like me SHOULD NOT have all this POWER.

I also gave Jacob literally the worst clue ever because we are sharing clues ladies xoxoxo

The clue was:

"Snape is taken aback. “That wouldn’t be any business of yours now would it? I wouldn’t want to find out you are spreading false information. I trust you won’t have any issue with that”. Congrats! You’ve discovered Snape Storyline 2! That’s all for the moment, and will end your search for this round."

BOTH ARE HALF TRUE. Just in case he doesn't put 2 and 2 together and now I went from place to place on purpose. He's gonna think now I gave him something of value and I know he's gonna think "No way someone go an idol on day fucking 3".

CONFESSIONAL 1.1 — Walking into the Great Hall, I saw a few familiar faces... for not good reasons!

First Jacob, who I know from tengaged. He and I were in a similar friend group for a short period before he left it, but we had a rocky relationship. We flirted a bit (blame 16-year-old Nicholas), but that is in the past.

Secondly, Jess... who I just directly sent home in Eve’s The Challenge: Fresh Meat. She did not have great words to say to me (such as I’m condescending), so I was very wary and, honestly, unhappy with her being here.

But, as Kylie Minogue says, it’s better the devil you know.

Flash forward to the Sorting Ceremony, and I’m so happy to be.. Slytherin? I told Mister Vintage (Sammy) and Mister Heinen (Caeleb) that I’m either a Ravenclaw or Hufflepuff, but I suppose I’ve been lying to myself.

Then, I see my tribe: both Jess and Jacob are present. This is a curse wrapped in a blessing wrapped in an enigma. And, I love it.

I hate, hate, hate conflict and bad vibes, so I directly spoke to both. Jacob did not easily recognize me, but remembered me fondly; so, a successful reacquaintance. Jess, on the other hand, was definitely more apprehensive (as was I), but I made one thing clear: the past is the past, and I am declaring my loyalty.

I have been hurt in previous games by shoving the past aside while the other is still grudgingly aiming for revenge, but I feel Jess is different. She apologized to me about her words, which did hurt, and I apologized to her. What I said was honest, so I’m glad to see a fateful blossoming.

The first reward challenge is revealed, and honestly, I’m really bad at participating in pre-merge competitions, because I do not mind tribal. However, I do want to, since we are such a small tribe, focus on maintaining our numbers in case of a swap. We came in second this reward, and honestly, I’m glad to have eaten cupcakes (although I hate cherry). The fact we all chose a dessert and were privately messaged makes me assume someone received an advantage, but who knows...

What I DO know is that I had two separate relationships, so I wanted to lock a trio down (Me, Jess, Jacob), but I obviously did not want to gamebot this early and make the chat day one. So, naturally, i waited until after immunity.

Speaking of immunity... I took charge, because I like it, but also, I wanted to be able to take blame if we lost. I hate the whole “let’s vote someone out cuz they cost us a virtual challenge” this early in the game, it’s a cheap way to vote. I want to vote on loyalty and activity instead. That’s why I am probably going to target Jessie or Vi, but I‘m unsure as to which will be my vote. On one hand, Vi is much less social, but she also contributed a lot to the challenge. I do not want to judge a book by it’s cover, so I will reach out to her and assess her vibe.

I like going to tribal first, because my philosophy is that it’s better to test loyalties now, rather than guess loyalties later.

Regarding other players, Jules and Juls just played in a mini with me and sheeped the majority alliance to screw me over, so I’m not feeling them right now. Bitterness doesn’t exist in my mind: play well and I respect it; sheep and be stupid, and I will gladly dish out the karma. 

I’m satisfied with the happenings of this game so far, and I hope to make it further!! This is one of my first real orgs so, I’m em definitely excited. x. nick

Yay we won immunity. Raffy do be carrying our tribe though!

WELL WELL WELL!!!!!!! as far as my relationships go which is where i left off last round, really nothing much has changed about how i feel about or view my tribemates, but in exciting news... we won immunity!! i am not going to be first boot that is so nice, and im hoping that we can keep winning immunity until a swap so I can feel more secure. I think I could stand a shot if we lost on this tribe but i think if so the vote would split 3-2 i dont think i can get a unanimous vote on anyone unless its myself which is NOT WHAT WERE TRYNA DO HERE !! if anything i feel like i have the best chance to wiggle myself in with the girls (lily and ruthie) Max would probably be my ideal first vote if we ever lose an immunity because I know landen can be useful in challenges, but he YET AGAIN addressed me with a name that does not sit well with me he called me a "challengewhore" yet another reference to TS 2020, so this is not a good sign. Ideally I could get landen out and still be set but i know he has a relationship with juls who i also have a relationship with and wish to continue to have in this game, and us going against each other could make that more stressful than it needs to be because i know landen avenged beck for voting juls out maybe juls would do the same for him? Much to think about, but thankfully i dont have to think about it all that hard because yet again we ARE SAFE !!! woo, anyways thats pretty much it hopefully we can keep winning :D

Ahhhh safety feels so nice, I’m glad that I’m not in danger of being the first boot. Also I love the fact that ravenclaw won the first challenge with so little moves HAHA!

I want to go far in this thing with lily and with kevin, my goal right now is to get to merge and owen be alive so I can work with him!

I am very happy to have won this immunity challenge. We barely won, but I managed to pull my tribe to a victory. Emphasis on the "I" part. I am very frustrated with my tribe's lack of challenge activeness and ability. If the time did not work for them, then I do not know why they even suggested doing it at 2 PM. This challenge would have gone faster if I had done everything myself. In the end, though, I hope this helps in me staying in the game because I am a necessity if they want to ever win a challenge in first place. I highly doubt that they could do it without me.

So I’m currently writing this with one hand because my cat decided to lie on my other one  anyways Nobody is really talking about the vote which means it’s probably me going but I’ll see what I can do to change that

Here's a breakdown of my first few experiences since I am writing this a few hours before the first tribal council.

FIRST I was cast in this game along with a BUNCH of people that are icons across different formats of Tumblr Survivor - so that's intimidating. Mostly because my play style is kinda vanilla in comparison. I gotta find a way to stand out or I'm going to be thrown out fast.

SECOND There's a twist that will probably have some major effect at some later point in the game where everyone is added to the Great Hall. I think that it's for convenience of posting things like results and challenges so it only has to be sent to one chat... but also so that we can feel THEMATIC which is a lot of fun.

The game started in the Great Hall and we got sorted into our houses and the implication was that it's random but.. I don't think it's entirely true if I can read into what the hosts said to me once I was sorted into Gryffindor (something about running out of room in Hufflepuff) - because I definitely didn't say Gryffindor in my application.

THIRD My tribe has the following people: Joshua, Juls, Raffy, Autumn, and myself. 

I do not know how many of theme said Gryffindor when they applied but also did not want to bring it up to them as I am masquerading as a brave idiot. :D

Anyway, I started conversations with all of them and they all seem very sweet!!

I've played in a game before with Raffy where he was super snakey but also a great ally until he tried to snake me. So there's that... he's also an "over the top" type of person so he takes charge a lot of the time and voices his opinions about everything. I hope we can create some sort of working relationship in the game, but I think that he will tell me the truth if he does align against me.

Autumn is super chill and super strategic-minded. She puts lots of thought into all of her decisions and makes calls that benefit her getting to the end while trying to align with the right people. If I can't get to the FTC of this game... TBH I want to make sure she gets there. I played with her in one game and we both were tossed out one after another when the game turned on our "side". I don't think that relationship will factor into this game as it was forever ago and we both kinda play "new" every time we start a game but I'm hoping she will want to try and play with me just because I've seen how great she is at the game.

Juls is a very fun person who seems to always be having a great time! I found out she lives in Texas too and that she was excited to get to know me because we are from the same state. I was like.. do I know you? Because when she messaged me the way she did implied that she knew who I was and I was thinking OH NO what have people said.

Joshua seems really sweet. He hasn't added incredibly much to conversations so far with him but he has contributed some fun things. I love that he tries to be entertaining, but as I see it so far he's the first person I'd be willing to vote out if it came to our tribe going to council... though of course, having said that I bet they've all declared me their first choice.

FOURTH The reward challenge was the Letter plus Number challenge so as predicted...

I did terribly and earned 0 points for our tribe and was SO happy it was not for immunity.

The immunity challenge was a Choose Your Own Adventure Puzzle.

We got a slow start in that I feel like everyone was afraid to make a move because that would put a target on whoever "failed for the team". Then me and Raffy kind of got things rolling with him taking the main leader role and me taking on a secondary role either agreeing with his suggestions or contributing a suggestion for what we should do.

There was a misunderstanding with the competition and we ended up making a whole bunch of extra moves because it was unclear to us that the letters we found at a later part of the challenge were able to be changed into numbers at a lockbox so we did a bunch of extra stuff... and I was resigned to the fact we were going to the first tribal when we go surprised that Slytherin... DID WORSE!!! O_O

Anyway... I still have no alliances or confirmed "working game" relationships and I really don't feel like starting those conversations at the moment so if I am out of the ones established or on the bottom of one that will add me to "pick me up" for later votes then I blame myself for not trying hard enough in that category.

FIFTH I definitely didn't just now search for the idol and waste two days that I could have searched other times. Nope! Not me!! :)

Anyway I went on a trip to Hagrid's Hut because I love me some Hagrid and I figured he'd let me in since I"m a Gryffindor and he loves us the best (you know, like a reverse Snape)... I dug through all of his junk and found his umbrella. Apparently I liked that it was pink and then left his hut. 

To be honest, I probably should have taken his dragon's egg and turned him in... maybe could have gotten him fired.

Someone finally got me to come out of retirement- can you believe it

It's been cute so far and I have no complaints, probably cause the hosts wisely put me, Owen, and Dan in separate corners lmao. Yooo if we all make it to merge?? Hell hath no fury. But we will cross that bridge when we get there! And for now I enjoy the calm before the storm. I deadass forgot how to be an org so I need all the time I can get to socialize and reacclimate. Me checking Skype more than once a year? Don't remember ever doing that. I love Raffy, it's always good to see Chips, I think I like Juls, and I'm not sure how I feel about Joshua but it's fine. I like Gryffindor cause we have no beef and I hope it stays that way.

ok so my tribe lost :( big sad. but im def ok bc jess is soooo close to me and we made a threesome with nick so. i think jessie is an easy first boot bc shes not around as much as vi. but really its our decision at the end of the day!

here’s the hot goss.. i’m a little upset i didn’t get anyone i Know on my house/tribe but also grateful HSBSNSNN all i know is that so far i’ve been doing pretty solid in securing relationships with those on my team (at least.. i hope so :flushed:) and i’m hoping they all like me hehe. kinda praying to just mist my way to merge where i can be united with people who like me enough to keep me around still.. >:D 

[survivorreelsmagicwithin]

Episode 1A - “The Hufflepuffs are too nice even for me”-Ruthie

This is not the tribe I would have picked. I do not know anyone here which means I am at a disadvantage from the start. However, I am really connecting with Jules right now so maybe I can vibe with them enough to get an immediate ally. But I still need someone else. I am still figuring out my tribe so it will take me a hot minute to adjust. I hope I am not the first boot. I am going to pull my weight in this challenge and pull my first W ever!

I'm fucked, Jess knows how i play bc she literally just hosted me for Old west like a month ago. Whoops. Also joanna is in a competely different house than be so I'm crying. So far I do like my other housemates but we'll see how much of a slytherin they truly are as the days go by.

why. does. this. cast. have. to. be. full. of. icons. i'm really not that good at survivor?? hopefully i do okay??? just tryna be social and shit. (also Ravenclaw is the best)

I’m heading to bed and the boys are about to have a call... I hope an all boys alliance isn’t about to form I’m not here for that! So far I’ve just talked to Kevin and Lily one on one and so far I really like both of them! I’m going to get to know the others tomorrow. This cast is so iconic. I talked to Owen before I read that we weren’t supposed to and he and I are going to go to final two together if neither of us get voted out!

i am SO NERVOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I DONT HAVE ANY INITIAL GOOD VIBES ABOUT ANYONE ON MY TRIBE!!!!!! NOT A PERSON!!!!!!!! AND I DONT WANT TO BE THAT ANNOYING BITCH ASKING THEM QUESTIONS ABOUT THEIR LIVES!!!! AND SHIT!!!!!!!!! ugh i dont want to be first boot EITHER LIKE!!!!!!! ugh. uGH.

Me and Jules are literally kindred souls. I love her so much already and she is my ride or die for the rest of the season. Fuck these other bitches!

Why do I feel like I am the only one putting in effort for this challenge. At least this means I will be safe for a hot minute, right?

Okay so... Max and Landen still haven't accepted my friend request I noticed when I just tried to message them.  I'm still talking to Kevin and Lily A LOT!  Kevin is so easy to talk to and Lily is too and she and I have SO much in common!  I really like the idea of aligning with the two of them but I'm too nervous to suggest it just yet. 

 Also, my wand was special and I got a special idol hunt out of it!  I didn't find anything but still!  I'm glad that I at least got one word??  Not sure if our team will win a reward or not but it would be nice!

Honestly, my tribe seems to be particularly inactive and nonchalant. I am the most active person here, in my opinion. It is kind of frustrating, however, to be the only one trying in this challenge except for the very few and far between exceptions. Joshua even forgot about the challenge entirely! I hope to God that these people, if we have to go to tribal because we lose the immunity challenge, do not vote me out. Honestly, it would make no sense since I am already proving that I will be a challenge asset and very active. I would make the best ally out of everyone on my tribe! I would be allies with myself!

I LOVE YOU OWEN BUT PLEASE GO SUCK A DICK. You need to stop. Wth, go back to school so we can get some points. You too Kevin DX But we're in the lead so far *knock on wood* and hopefully stay that way. Love Jess and I hope I can take her to like f4 but I think I want to take Joanna and Owen to f3 if I even make it that far

This cast.... WHOA!!!! feel like yall had to put some of these ppl under imperius curse to get them back because I havent seen these faces in a WHILE!!!! Ruthie is a queen, first thing we messaged to each other was f2 <333 love her but dont trust that she wont turn on me at some point lol. Raffy my little island of shade bro, and Autumn <3 crossroads queen.... nice to see some of my children back here. I'm glad Jess is in the game because I like her a lot but I did just disappoint her in eve's challenge game so...we will see. but i love jess regardless :) ummmm... so happy I was sorted onto the brain tribe, then immediately proceeded to fuck up several times in the spelling challenge LOL

My tribe is nice though. I'm glad I'm with Dan - we have a weird history in games, but we've both been here for 7/8 years at this point and our ancient bones will prob work together. I already think him and Jules are going to be my alliance on this tribe <3 jules is AMAZING but I can tell they (? is this correct pronouns i dont remember and it wasnt in the posts) are a social legend and are going to be on EVERYONE's good side. love them though already, we have a lot in common and it was easier to talk to them + also get into a bit of game chat.

Joanna and Miguel....not so much. I like them both fine, but they don't know how to converse. I asked them all a shit ton of questions and they didn't ask a SINGLE thing back???? Like...okay work! I can't do it all for you, give me somethin!!!! I do like them both, it's just....they don't give a shit about me! LOL

Miguel is also an awkward one because I played with him LEGIT five years ago or more, in a game where we were on opposite sides. I'd rather work with him based on that connection than not but...apparently he already told Jules that we were against each other before??? and he's barely spoken to me so whatever. I like him, he's cute and he's funny, but.... if he's telling people more about me than he's willing to even get out of me myself, it's a no from me :)

WOOHOOOO WE WON REWARD!! I DIDN'T REALLY HELP (i tried but with no success) BUT I'M STILL REALLY HAPPY ABOUT IT! THANK GOD FOR OWEN

Well it’s day 2, we just lost reward but Immunity is still up for grabs!! Hopefully it’s something we can excell it but 👀 a bitch don’t have many skills so we gon have to see on that one! Other than that we got to know our tribe mates, I have a really good tribe! First off there is Ruthie who I played an old season of TS with and I worked with her BUT also voted her out :c so maybe we can work together and look past that? She was a really good ally of mine but it didn’t work out. I’ve loved talking to her again tho <3 then there is Lily! A new person to me but I absolutely adore her I love her energy she’s so talkative our conversations have been really good! If I had it my way I would work with her in this game, but I don’t want to force anything so I’m not gonna bring that up to her this early. Then there is landen another familiar face to me, I played also a TS season with him, and we had a rocky relationship in that game, not really do in part to either of us just how the cards fell. I did NOT vote him out but we didn’t end our game relationship on the best terms. He seems the least eager to want to talk to me which is not a good sign bc I remember him being so outgoing in 2020 and that energy not being matched here worries me. He also addressed me as “mr. 2020 winner” in our first talk so <3 maybe he might target me <3 thays so fun <3 lastly there is MAX! Max is fun, kinda loud but in a good way, he wasn’t all that helpful in the challenge for reward (him nor landen were all that active) and we had a good first conversation and then it’s seemingly gone downhill? I still have to see if our momentum picks back up before I decide what my plans with him are, i wouldn’t mind working with him if possible but he is also fairly close to landen (apparent after an over 2 hour long call last night.. IN THE TRIBE CHAT) so if landen has a distaste for me he’ll definitely spread that to max if he has the choice, so I gotta tread carefully but only time will tell how I end up fairing on this tribe :o WISH ME LUCK 

It is second day of school and I already hate everyone. It seems that I actually went back to Junior high where everyone's playing PENIS on the great hall. I forgot how it felt to play with teenagers and I'm not here for it. I think I'll be a true ravenclaw and isolate myself reading a book or learning new spells cause I don't have many interests in common with these people. On a side note I'm really happy to be a Ravenclaw, and I actually like our team, I think we are strong and I hope I'm not in danger if we do lose, I'll try to work on my foreigner charm and start faking even more my mexican accent if that's what I need to do in order to stay, Jules is amazing, loved her and I hope we can work well together. Also I love the whole castle idol hunt idea , so... charming.

First things first... this cast is... BONKERS. I didn't expect it to be as stacked as it is..

I'm scared.

I hate it here.

There are sooo many weird relationships here which is kind of a good thing and a bad thing. The good thing about it is... I THINK that means some people got beef and I can maybe piggy back off of some of these relationships... IDK I'm not trying to think too deep into anything right now.

BUT... y'all put me on a tribe with someone who just single handily put me out of a game TWO FUCKING DAYS AGO and I'd like to complain to your MANAGERS @hosts.

In all seriousness I'm going to try and have fun in this game and not take it entirely tooo seriously.

ALSO.. my fucking wand gave me the option for a "quest" yesterday but it'd have to remove me from the tribe chat... so obviously... I gave the quest to someone else. Aka: Jacob.. who I knew would be a selfish bitch and take the quest. I also knew the likelihood of him telling me about what actually happened were high and I'd virtually get no weird looks my way because I WASN'T the one who was removed from the tribe chat. This basically ensured that I got to know what the quest was, its potential contents, and paint a target on someone else rather than myself in case there was virtually nothing to base the first couple of votes on... right?

I think I'm onto something with the idol guesses. There's weird storylines in them and I THINK if I can somehow get to the green house and find the other ingredients that were in Snape's writing I'll be onto something.

Also me and Jacob snapped in that Reward challenge and these HEATHENS should thank us for single-handily giving them a reward. Nick randomly slept all god damn day.. which really annoyed me. We have a reward and you are gonna SLEEP ALL DAY? SIR? I get real life happens but at least hide the fact you sleeping sis.

My tribe is literally probably the LAST TRIBE I wanted to end up on because well.. 1. Nick is shady and social. He might take the fact that I was loyal to people in the other game into account. I've tried the whole "I start off each game fresh and no hard feelings" spell but will he accept it? Tune in folks. I also technically can't explain my actions in the game to him because he is currently still in it so... PARTY!

2. Jacob is amazing and I love him. We've actually played several games together and weirdly always end up super loyal to people. He's a crackhead though so I'm gonna have to be a BIT cautious with him. I sipped dumb bitch juice and told him about Snape's writing because I want to show him some sort of token of loyalty.

3. Vi is a crackhead. I know this because I've hosted her. Kind of wanna fuck around and give her first boot from the tribe because I DO NOT TRUST HER. When she gets bored, she fucks things up, she lies for fun, and well... no.

4. Jessie seems really sweet so far. We haven't really spoken much which kind of sucks but we will get there!? I think?

I think some may have found something, because I just idol searched and I the exact same path I did yesterday, and yesterday there were three different choices and today there were only two. The only reason I could think of why one of the ending options were removed is that something was there and something was found...

12 minutes later

turns out it was a mistake, never mind

Okay it is challenge time and Max is around I think and Lily is finishing a class but KEVIN AND LANDEN ARE LATE, they are delinquents I expect more from Hufflepuffs than this tardiness.

I'm definitely kidding but... may not be able to be around for the entire challenge if they don't hurry the heck up.  Part of me wants to start but I don't want this to be on me if we don't do well.  OH Kevin just messaged me so at least another tribe member is on... WHY is he not messaging the tribe chat?? OH Lily is on now so I should stop writing and get to business...  WISH us cute little badgers luck!

I'm definitely kidding but... may not be able to be around for the entire challenge if they don't hurry the heck up.  Part of me wants to start but I don't want this to be on me if we don't do well.  OH Kevin just messaged me so at least another tribe member is on... WHY is he not messaging the tribe chat?? OH Lily is on now so I should stop writing and get to business...  WISH us cute little badgers luck!

20 minutes later

been doing this challenge for over an hour, i feel defeated

If this wasn't a team work thing I would be done by now these people are slowing me down. x_x.  DLSJFSLDFJ I shouldn't complain. They all have good ideas but it takes FOREVER to agree on something.  Also I do feel like an asset to the hufflepuff tribe because when I was eating lunch with my family Lily messaged me and told me I was the glue holding the tribe together and she wished I was back and that made me feel VERY good about my place on the tribe!

But seriously I'm just ready for the challenge to be over so low key I hope that Max stops responding for awhile again so I can just say random shit until we finish the dang thing LSDJFLSJDF.

The Hufflepuffs are too nice even for me.

That challenge went terribly. In all honesty, I would not blame my tribe for wanting to take me out because I took up the leadership role. But it was not like anyone else was taking the reigns so I needed to do something. I just hope they can see the merits of keeping me in this game. I really don't want to be first boot. I think we're going to have to go to tribal because we we took so long. God this is going to be so frustrating.

This challenge is NEVER going to end I'm trying to be patient but Max always interjects with something and it SLOWS EVERYTHING DOWN FOR TEN MINUTES.  OR MORE. I just have this window open to complain, lol, I won't send this for awhile. LOL Max is killing me. All the boys are exhausting I don't think they have been paying any attention to the notes I have been making, if we go to tribal council Lily and I SHOULD be safe.

OKAY it was fun that everyone just joined in in the end but I'm so glad that it is over and I hope that we won this thing and are safe!

me: im gonna be sneaky and not tell my alliance ALL the info i have also me: tells them info i couldnt possibly know without telling them ALL the info i have anyways.

https://youtu.be/qhfHo_Ns1xQ

Living my dream as a huff puff, no big deal. So far I’m really enjoying being on my tribe. We all communicate well and have positive attitudes about things. We also had so much fun at the immunity challenge but I can tell we are all stressed about the results. I’m really impressed by everyone this season being involved and I could tell people were on their A game during the reward challenge. I would really hate to see us as the bottom tribe having to go to tribal. I honestly don’t want to see any of these people go but I certainly don’t want to be first boot. I’m really proud of our tribe and I would hate to have a loss right now put a crack in the friendships we have been building.