#if i dont get a response soon ill just figure it out on my own | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

rrxnjun · 1 year

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IM SORRY FOR ANSWERING SO SUPER LATE LIFE GOT SO HECTIC ALL OF THE SUDDEN☹️

STILL WITH THE TAKE THE STAIRS FIC U GAVE ME LIFE WITH IT ACTUALLY IT WAS SO NICE TO JUST TURN MY BRAIN OFF AND READ IT SO I THANK U FOR IT!! and like actually need a jaemin in my life istg!! AND THE SAME GOES FOR THE TEASER OF UR NEW CHENLE FIC!!! IT ALREADY SEEMS SO FUN!! SO EXCITED ABOUT IT!!! 🥳🤭

I AGREE I WOULD ALSO RATHER JUST GOOGLE THE END OF THE SHOW!!

AHH I HOPE U FOUND SOME ARTISTS SINCE THEN!!! AND THANK U SO MUCH FOR TAKING TIME OUT OF UR DAY AND TRANSLATING FOR ME!! IM SURE U ARE VERY BUSY AS WELL SO THANK U SO MUCH I REALLY APPRECIATE IT!!!!🥹🥹💝💓 and my god the lyrics are so☹️☹️☹️ it's just such a great song and now it even got so much better with understanding it!!!🥲

WELL IF IT DOES HAPPEN I WILL BE HERE XD parents smh /j (but like actually i understand them cuz traveling alone can be risky☹️) thank u i hope we will figure something out if it does happen🥹🥹

IM GLAD THAT U ARE DONE WITH ONE OF UR ESSAYS ALREADY!! AND I HOPE SINCE MY LAST ASK U STILL ARE DOING GOOD WITH UR SCHOOL WORK AND STUFF🥳

I LOVE UR POSTS THERE LMAO SO DONT BE SORRY and ofc i agree!!! zach was my fav from the why dont we boys🤭 OH MY I HAVENT HEARD ABOUT THE VAMPS IN AGES damn now i'm gonna go and listen to them😵‍💫(also saw that u turned into a treasure stan🫣 and ur take on jikjin!! it's such a great song glad u listened to it!!!)

(liebestraum anon💕 and sorry if i disappear again and for writing a lot i swear i will try and keep it short for once☹️)

AHH ITS TOTALLY OKAY!!!! cant say i didnt miss you but i ofc understand that u have your own life and responsibilities and such,, so dont worry about it🤍🤍 AND THANK U SM AGAIN!!!

DJDJSJ MY CHENLE FIC IS FUN BUT THEN IT GETS DEPRESSING REAL QUICK SO UHHH HOPE YOU'RE READY FOR SOME ANGST ;-; (also i started rewriting liebestraum. just thought i'd let you know<3)

im super glad u enjoyed my translation!! the lyrics are really screamable in my opinion,,, and i also hope i did them justice however i bet i did a better job than all of the ones i saw online :p its not the best artistic lyricism but i like it nonetheless DJSK sometimes u need simple songs to jam to.

travelling alone COULD be risky </3 me and my uni friends randomly travelled to vienna last week because it was warm out and we thought our seasonal depression was finally over and i love me some spontaneous decisions but also it was so anxiety inducing bc it was my first time going abroad with no supervision 😭😭 we had SO much fun but also the stress we were put through to find the bus platform back home ??? never again. was so bad that i broke my 5 month streak of not smoking bc i had to calm myself down somehow and then i was put through the stress of buying cigarettes in german when i caNT SPEAK GOOD GERMAN but 10/10 i would do it again and it made me more confident abt travelling with friends so i WILL drag my equally spontaneous uni friends to budapest as soon as i can. (please tell me they speak at least a little english there)

I AM ACTUALLY DONE W 4 ESSAYS NOW WHOOP WHOOP ‼‼‼ 4 MORE TO GO BUT IM DOING WELL NO STRESS SO FAR. HOPE YOUR SCHOOL IS GOING WELL TOO!

wait do u rlly bc i think im so annoying on there sometimes like girl chill😭😭 but ZACH WAS ALWAYS MY FAV TOO altho i did have a daniel phase. I havent listened to the vamps in ages either i should catch up or sum ;-;

omg dont mention the teumefication of bar i wont admit it to myself yet DHSKSK however jikjin is now my fav song and i fear seeing my 2023 spotify wrapped bc of it now. ive also been watching a concerning amount of treasure map and finding myself in love with jihoon but thats...not important rn.

ill be waiting for u liebestraum anon!!! dw abt sending long asks i always look forward to them🤍 hope your days are filled with joy mwah

#💌ask #liebestraum anon

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gwyneirastorm · 1 year

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So I'm four weeks post-op today and I have two more weeks until my last post-op appointment, where the doctor will hopefully toss my crutches and say, "You don't need these!"

What I'm not going to tell him is that I've been walking around my house without them for a week and a half now. I still use them out in public, but I don't need them at home. I dont have pain when I walk, I don't feel unsteady on my feet, I'm not doing any squatting or crawling...Im just walking around. Getting from one place to another without my crutches.

I just couldn't take them anymore. They were such a pain in the ass, more trouble than they were worth, and I needed to be able to take care of my kid and my house because my husband got three days in and decided it was all too much for him. So I stayed on them as long as I could and then I just set them aside so I could resume mom and wife duties. I know that's bad, but it is what it is. I told him from the beginning, for weeks before my surgery, that it was going to be very difficult and overwhelming, you need to prepare yourself for this, blah blah blah. Did he listen to me at all?

No.

I started dressing myself and helping myself around on day two because he started complaining about how taking care of both of us (me and the kid) was too much. By day three, I was slowly cleaning things up and hanging up laundry because he complained the house was too much to keep up. We lived in straight up filth for two weeks because he just wouldn't do certain things like run the vacuum or wipe down the counters or clean the shower.

And the shower--dont get me started on the shower. I wanted to at least shower every other day, but showering is cumbersome when you can only use one leg. I found a stool and rigged up a system where I sit the stool on a towel so it wouldn't slip, put another towel on top for me to sit on, and then I was good to go. I could even wash and clean myself once I got in the tub, but I needed his help to get in and out. You would have thought I was asking him to carry me on his back instead of use his arm to steady myself. After my third shower, I honestly didn't want his help anymore so I just took the risk and got myself in and out of the tub.

By the end of week two, my whole family (dad, mom, sister) had all contracted some kind of virus and were all horribly ill. The problem was that they were supposed to be helping me take care of the kid during the day while hubs was at work. So that Friday my dad called early to tell me they were all sick and we should stay away so we don't get the plague as well. I didn't feel comfortable at all staying home with my kid by myself so soon after my surgery and I was afraid I wouldn't be able to care for him. I asked my husband if he could just take the day off and use one of his PTO days. He said, "No. Figure something out if you need help." Then he walked out the door and just expected me to figure it all out.

So I finally got sick of it all--him not taking care of my house, not taking care of me, not taking care of my kid--and I put down the crutches and started walking by myself so I could handle my responsibilities again. I decided a few days ago that I would be bringing all of this up in marriage counseling after I had to listen to him brag to himself about what a great husband, father and homemaker he is. Which is, of course, HORSE SHIT.

Anyway, so my leg is sore from use, but its muscle pain and I think its because I didn't use it for two weeks. I really can get around pretty well on my own now. Im very impressed with how much better the surgery has made things overall. My mobility is much better and I have almost no pain. I had actually forgotten what that was like.

#josie rambles #chronic pain #disability #hip pain #hip surgery #surgery recovery #avascular necrosis

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kitvinslakte · 2 years

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just personal thoughts i want to get written out

i feel like i'm being sabotaged by myself. my living conditions are not great and ive been unsure how much of that is my *situation* or *me* bc like. i leave trash around (because theres nowhere to put it) and i leave food out (because the kitchen doesnt feel safe) and i dont do my laundry or clean up my room anytime (because its overwhelming, because i dont have the time or energy, because much of the mess isnt mine to move and so it'll never be *better* enough to let me breath so why bother...) and i don't know how much of that is my adhd, my laziness, my outside stress?

but this week and the next i'm housesitting at my parents, and i figured- it's not like a controlled experiment but i wanted to see if i could operate like a human for this period of time. I would work my usual hours, but instead of having a 45 minute drive home to a house that didn't feel right to me, i'm driving 15 minutes to something clean and all mine (for now). And i made the decision- every day i would make at least one meal that constitutes "real food" to me. I would keep the trash where it belongs, i would do chores and laundry and be responsible. and that worked great for exactly one day, because then i got sick and it's been 3 days of this. i haven't been working (obviously) but im also leaving trash everywhere (tissues, like anyone does when the're sick, right?) and i haven't cleaned up after myslef at all... i feel like if i weren't sick i would probably be fine but the whole point was to test myself and! I'm failing! and i can't decide if the sickness excuses my failure or if being out of work should make up for the lack of energy. I look at the mess i've made already and it feels like with this little cold i've signed my death warrent. It's not the situation or the commute or anything. it's just me, being broken and lazy and useless and i'll never ever change so why should i try?

If this cold had waited just another few days i think maybe i wouldve handled it better, if i'd kept on track of what id set out to do until then. but because i failed the test i set for myself- something i thought would be easy!- i feel like i have the answer to my question now. that theres no way out. no matter where i move or what job i have or how hard i try... if i have my own space or not... if i am comfortable or not... i will always be a useless slob. and i know! I know what to say. it's my depression talking. i dont want to stop trying, not really. i think. im just. tired. i guess.

i want to be better.

i want to be able to handle shit like a person.

maybe i should just go to bed and hope i can prove myself wrong. ill get better soon. then i'll show myself i can clean up after my messes. i can work, and feed myself, and keep my space clean... ill be fine. i just need to give myself another chance

#yeah‚ i dont really believe that last bit but. i'll keep saying it until it works‚ right?#vinslakte #rambling #personal #on a scale of 1 to 10‚ how much do i want to stop existing?

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fox-and-fischer · 2 years

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@kideia oh goodness, thank you for letting me know! ill try to get those up soon.

as for the questions you asked!

4. Do you notice any shifts in your state of mind or wellness after you work magic? This includes minutes, hours, days, or more time after the act of magic.

oftentimes, yes! i think this is partially due to the fact that, since i practice secretly, i don't have any outside energetic influences (spirit guides, deities, ancestors, etc.). when i do spellwork, im often working entirely off my own energy, so i feel pretty tired after the majority of workings. that said, i also often get a feeling of lightless, especially after cleanse-oriented workings. its kind of like taking a deep breath after breathing shallowly for so long; a 'i cant believe ive been missing this'-like feeling.

12. How much do you think your mental and emotional state matters when working magic? Do you believe your magic will not work as well unless you are in a certain mental/emotional place?

i dont think that magic wont work if youre not in a particular headspace, but i would say that your headspace/emotional state will affect your workings. for example, if youre trying to do a prosperity or healing work on someone you absolutely loathe, i dont think that spell is going to work very well 😅 it boils down to how much youre able to focus intent in different emotional situations.

17. If you rely on feelings to guide you during acts of magic, share what you can about these feelings and how they help you :)

for me, feeling is most important during toolless divination. as a closet witch, i don't have access to a pendulum or cards or throwing bones or anything like that, so a lot of my divination is a lot less guided than normal. i ask a question while trying to project my inner voice, sometimes using a candle as an amplifier, and try to feel what the response is. this is difficult for me because i need to make myself go 'spiritually limp' if that makes sense- completely relax and have no thoughts for just a few seconds to give space for an external voice to appear. i often 'feel around' in this area some to try to ensure that it was truly what an entity was saying and not my own inner voice just saying what i expected or wanted to hear.

feel is present in other areas of my craft, but it isnt as essential as it is in divination. ill often use feel to figure out how effective my cleansing was or how active my spell is, but in those cases 'feel' isnt the end-all-be-all like it can be with divination.

thank you so much for these questions; i had a great time answering them!!

#the poison plant rambles #witchblr #witchcraft #hemlock talks about its practice

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fckwritersblock · 3 years

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Protection Forever - William Lennox

Lennox x Reader

Description: Running into an old flame at the worst possible time.

Warning: nah. Bad writing? Kinda. Unedited because I was excited. I’ll not when it’s been fixed. Somethings may not be fully aligned with the movie but I tried 😩

Word count: 2500+

Dedicated to @merakiaes hey fren!

All gifs from @meragifs too!

You were an EMT.

The two of you pulled up to meet with the other Autobots, you exiting the vehicle before he transformed. You were in awe as he and the rest of the cars all changed.

The biggest one, their leader, gave a rundown of everything that was happening once he confirmed Sam’s identity. This was just a recap for you as Ratchet had already explained. The teenage boy just stood there stuttering not really knowing how to process everything and you frowned again. That was when you really took notice of two teens just standing there. Having known what was expected of Sam Witwicky you frowned slightly.

“I don’t know about this Ratchet, he’s just kid.” You commented to the alien you had formed a quick bond with.

“And who might you be?” The one called Optimus inquired.

You gave him your name before the other yellow autobot, who you’d later learned was Bumble Bee, uttered something through his radio. It was hard for you to hear but the other robots seemed to be use to it as Ratchet responded immediately.

“The human. I like her.” Ratchet sounding irritated.

Bumblebee made another comment and right before Ratchet could respond one of the others chimed in.

“Wait why do they get humans?” Jazz asked incredulously. “I want one too!”

“Enough! Humans are not pets.” The one call Optimus Prime stated sternly, clearly tired of their bickering. You held your laugh, highly amused.

They were like siblings. A family.

“Exactly I’m just here to help and be a better tour guide than these kids can be.” You confirmed practically forcing your services on them. “Besides they need adult supervision. From the looks of it, you all do.” You grinned at everyone around you. Optimus gave a nod, agreeing.

“She stays. Let’s move.”

In that short amount of time things moved rather quickly. You watched the Autobots accidentally destroy Sam’s backyard when attempting to retrieve the glasses, you were all arrested, you escaped thanks to the Autobots, only to be arrested again.

Fail.

Finally you ended it some secret base. How get you weren’t alone. The government had apparently been on a roll with kidnapping civilians who “knew too much “.

Things weren’t going great but quickly went left when the Decepticons, the Autobot rivals, came to retrieve Megatron.

A war from another planet had officially made Earth its battleground.

You were nervous, trying to figure out how to calm everything down before things started to escalate. Nobody was going to get anywhere with all the bickering. That’s when you saw him.

It had been what? Two years?

Still, without even knowing it, without even knowing you were present, he was still able to make your heart be slow and fast at the same time. The army had aged him, but for the better making him all the more attractive but you couldn’t focus on that right now. Especially when you heard:

“The cryogenic system is failing! We're losing NBE One!”

All the soldiers begin to pack everything that they could to prepare in a fight the way they always did. It was an mirable the way Linux game orders in his men took them without a second thought. The trust there.

“That’s good. Get all the ammo you got.”

“Everything you can carry. Bring it.”

Tearing your eyes away from your former lover you grab Sam.

“Come on, we need Bee.” You reminded him, nodding in Simmons direction

“You got to take me to my car.” Sam said, then repeated when he was ignored. “You have to take me to my car. He’s gonna know what to do with the Cube.”

“Your car? It's confiscated.”

“Then unconfiscate it.” You stared blankly.

“We do not know what will happen if we let it near this thing! -“

“You don't know.”

“Maybe you know, but I don't know.”

You rolled your eyes at the insufferable mans rambling.

This was really was more about ego who was in control more than anything. The guy running the ship, clearly was on a power trip. Unfortunately for him he was facing off against soldiers . The Captain who’s eyes you could feel staring at the side of your face.

A Captain and his soldiers. Ones that really dont like to lose and take serving their country seriously.

The guy who arrested you earlier continue to argue with Sam about getting him back to bumblebee when Lennox finally pulled out his gun sick of the back-and-forth.

“Take him to his car!”

As soon as he did so all hell broke loose and everyone from both parties pulled out a weapon.

“Drop it!”

It wasn’t until One of the sector seven agents pointed a gun at the back of Will’s head that you disable to another agent and took his gun and pointed it directly and held it directly at the one pointing the gun at your ex.

“I really wouldn’t.” You warned.

You were no soldier, but Will have taught you plenty before you broke up. So did your brother, before he passed away. He actually served alongside Will but died in combat. Biking. That’s part of why you were so hurt when Will re-enlisted. When he got promoted to Captain and chose the army over you. You were terrified of losing him the way you lost your brother. The break up wasn’t that messy but you both said things you didn’t mean. In attempts to mask your own pain and hurt one another.

You know. Hurt people, hurt people.

It’s still came to no surprise that you put a bullet in someone to protect him. Together or not you’d never let anything happen to him.

“I'm ordering you under S-Seven executive jurisdiction-“ Simmons ranted.

“S-Seven don't exist.” You interjected, earning a quick appreciative glance from Will.

“Right. And we don’t take orders from people that don’t exist.”

“I’m gonna count to 5. Okay-“ Simmons attempted to threat yet again.

“Well, I’m gonna count to three.” Will deadpanned.

You knew that look. God did you know that look and it was so wrong that you were so turned on.

Finally the Secretary of defense interfered telling Simmons to do what was being asked of him. Everyone relaxed slight, weapons lowering.

“Y/n,”

“Captain.”

The Captain and couldn’t help but watch you how do you get up and prepare to go.

“So that’s her huh?” Epps commented as Will watched you run off with Sam.

“Yeah..” Will answered, mind racing.

While he knew he’d eventually see you again, he didn’t think it would be like this. You looked breath taking.

“Damn. Shorty had your back that entire time.”

“Gear up,”

“What I’m just saying I thought she was gonna put a cap in his.” Epps shouted after his Captain receiving no response.

Will knew you had his back, you always would, the same way he would always have yours. He thought of you often, the break up between two inescapable, never feeling like he did the right thing. You were always not too far from the front of his mind. Him wondering how you were doing. If you were happy. If you found somebody else. There was no doubt he regretted what had transpired between the two of you. It was his fault. He knew that. You knew that. He had ample opportunity to fight for you and he didn’t. When he was promoted Captain he felt he had to choose between you and the army. He didn’t choose you the way he should’ve. In reality he could’ve had both. However hr so caught up proven himself to his deadbeat dad that he possibly let the best thing that ever happened to him go.

Not to mention trying to atone for your brothers death. It wasn’t his fault, but he still couldn’t shake it. So without talking to you he reenlisted. Needless to say where that got him.

Now hear the both of you were in the middle of an alien war. Yeah. This is the last place he thought he’d see you.

You were numb. The battle on the highway enough to freak you out. For mommy, just a moment you thought this might be a dream but no. This is all very real. One minute you guys were just entering the city trying to lay low, next thing you know - BOOM! The explosion knocked all of you over, injuring some, killing a few. Bumblebee’s legs were partially blown off.

Getting up off the pavement you waited for the ringing in your ear to subside as you stood up, trying to study yourself when you felt a pair of arms hold you still.

You knew it was Will just by the way he touched you, you blinked hard trying not to go down memory lane.

“Are you okay?” The concern in his voice was enough to make your heart skip a bear.

“Yeah,” you nodded slowly. “Yeah I’m fine.”

Slowly you removed yourself from his grip and went to check on Sam and Mikaela. Ratchet on the other hand -

“Hmm. His pheromone levels are-“ you quickly turned on him and glared.

“Ratchet I’ll turn you into a can opener if you don’t shut the hell up.”

The robot nearly held his hands up in the surrendering position as he followed you. Will had arranged an aircraft to pick up Sam and the cube while everyone else defended themselves against the deceptive cons in a hurry to get the cube far far away before Megatron arrived. Sam was in a panic and so Michaela, you could see Will’s short fuse getting ready to exploded. It was then you decided to be an escort.

“Sam, you can’t do this alone.” Michaela fussed.

“He won’t be alone.” You commented, causing all parties involved to look at you.

“I’m going with you.” You declared.

“No.” Will didn’t even hesitated as he stepped closer to you.

“Captain Lennox-“

“No!” You grabbed him by the front of his beer and pushed him back.

“Do you see what going on out there?!” You continued to hold on to him and you yelled at him over there chose. “We’re at a war. One we are extremely ill prepared for. So get your shit together! Sam is my responsibility. I have to get this kid to safety.”

This time your hands slid up the side of his face forcing him to look at you.

“Y/n..” he breathed out leaning down toward you, and for the first time during all this madness you could visibly see he was afraid.

“I’ll be back, Will.” You assured him, briefly resting your forehead against his.

Gathering himself he pulled away, looking toward Sam then back at you.

“Go. Go!”

And then we were running.. With nothing but an M16 strapped to your back and the pistol in your hand, you ran faster than you ever have before.

The four of you were under attack once more, you and Sam doing what you had to, to avoid getting snatched up as a fight Ironhide and Ratchet defended you. Unfortunately you were too close to one of the cars that went up in flames and you were thrown into another car from the blast.

“Y/n!” You could feel the blood on your forehead as you slowly pushed yourself up. As you tried to stand you immediately stopped feeling the pain in your thigh. Looking down could see the damage that had been done. The blood surrounding the afflicted area.

“Wha- what, what do i do?!” Sam asked frantically once he took notice of your injury.

“You gotta keep going Sam. I’ll be fine.”

He stood fo his feet, unsure of what to do. When Ironhide told him the same thing.

“Go!” You screamed once more.

Sam left and continued to run without you as you, as quickly as possible, as you tore your focus away from him to pull the shard of glass in your leg out. Ripping a piece of your shirt off you tightly tied it around your thigh in order to stop the bleeding. There was no point in going forward now but the return back to everyone else and help them fight.

You just had to avoid getting killed in the process.

You seen a car steering wheel, a Mountain Dew vending machine and and Xbox all turn into one of those freaky ass robots right before your eyes. All of which you helped others fight off. It was so surreal. In fact, if it wasn’t for the constant ringing in your ear from all the explosions you definitely think you were dreaming. You almost made it back to Lennox and his men when another Decepticon stood between between you and your destinations. They were definitely taking a beating. You saw Epps shooting a green laser indicating the robot that doubled as a helicopter wasn’t a friendly and decided to do what you could to keep the Decepticon from getting any closer to them and hurting any more civilians. In an attempt to draw it away from everyone else, you begin to fire your weapon giving it everything you had.

Unfortunately, the side effective taking its attention off the others meant putting the attention on you.

You ran trying to duck and dodge a bullets now directed your way.

But Will. Will’s heart dropped. Seeing you there defending yourself alone. His pause was brief, the air forces plan already in motion, before he started the motorcycle and was speeding in your direction.

“William!” You screamed for him fearfully as he drove straight toward the robot.

The only thing you could hear was your heartbeat pounding in your ears. You almost couldn’t breathe, you don’t remember the last time you ever felt so scared in your life. But it wasn’t your life you feared for was it?

He rushed forward and slid under the robot continuing to firing the launcher. All you could do was watch as he drove toward you. Toward the danger your mind wondering if he did that on a regular basis. Was this the life of a soldier? What he went through day after day when he was deployed?

Standing up he only spared the parts of the dismembered robot a glance before shouting and turning looking for you. In a matter of seconds he was standing directly in front of you and pulling you into his arms.

Relief.

There was nothing like physically being about to touch someone, hold someone to really know they were okay.

“So…” you began, suddenly feeling nervous. “...That was hot-“

Before you were able to get another word in, he captured your lips with his kissing you roughly and bringing you closer, hands on the small of your back. You couldn’t help it kiss him back just as fiercely put in every emotion you had into that kiss.

Every ounce of passion he had in body, put into this kiss, your lips just as soft, kiss just as pure as he remembered. When you kissed, he knew he was a goner and could never let you go again.

It has been two years since the last time you guys have been this close. This intimate. Reconnected. The feeling it gave you, the indescribable feeling, was one neither one of you ever wanted to forgo again. Pulling back slowly, you both had smiles on your faces, Will pulling you closer to plant a kiss on your forehead.

“Excuse me,” Epps interrupted.

The both of you turning your attention on him.

“As cute as this shit is it’s highly inappropriate in the middle of the battle. I’m just saying we are trying to stay alive and shit.”

———————————————

Oh my fu- I don’t even know what this isssss

Couldn’t tell you what my original ideas was or nothing. I believed this was going to short-

I enjoyed writing it though! Shoutout again to @merakiaes for being on this lennox train with me lol

I’m just....I’m just gonna leave this mess here.

Bye

- Mo

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Tags: @merakiaes @lilythemadqueen

#transformers imagine #transformers #Captain William lennox #william lennox #Lennox x reader #sam witwicky #will lennox x reader #transformers x reader #black!reader #Sam witwicky x reader #optimus prime

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iwaisuke · 3 years

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confessions; but not remembering it

ft. kita shinsuke, sakusa kiyoomi x sick fem!reader

genre: fluff

masterlist

a/n: this has been sitting in my drafts for a while and then i rushed bc i was getting tired 🙃 also. sakusa's is a little ooc. sorry ab that

-» ˚⸙͎۪۫⋆

» the clean yet musty smell of rain filled the gym as the boys practiced. it was a surprisingly humid and rainy spring day today here in the country side of hyogo

» "achoo" you had been sneezing and coughing all day. you also had a terrible headache but took some medicine to see if it would help. the spring allergies really getting to you

» you didnt reay have the time to be worrying about yourself. As a 2nd year manager of the inarizaki team, (recommend by suna) and the boys working so hard practicing for nationals there was no way you'd let this little cold get in the way. you had to work just as hard as everyone else!

» "hold on, im about to hang up your jerseys to dry"

» "i got you guys some fresh towels!"

» "i can run and grab that coach. im headed that way anyways"

» the coach called for a short break to rest up for a bit. everyone was sore and exhausted from practicing every day. "here. i filled your water bottles up!" handing them to all the boys. "y/n you're all wet" akagi sounded concerned.

» "hm? oh its alright. I'll dry off in a minute. i took the shortcut to the drinking fountain to refill your waterbottles instead of taking the long way" you nonchalantly said. "so you ran through the rain like an idiot?" suna threw a clean towel over your damp hair and ruffled it. "suna!! stop!! you're gonna ruin my hair"

» "like i said. its alright" you reassured the boys.

» kita, on the other hand had noticed your fatigue. although he wasnt as perceptive on peoples feeling and thoughts as well as others, he could easily pick up signs like yours. he admired you dearly for how hard you always work for the team. how you willingly did anything to make them smile. how you always put others first before yours. needless to say, he had a bit of a crush on you.

» "l/n san. i think you should take a break too. there's no need for you to be running around for us while we're resting" kita assured you. "i still have a few things left on my list to do.. but afterwards I'll take a break!" kita let out a sigh. you were stubborn sometimes and kita knew you were the kind of person to not stop until you're finished.

» "I'll be right back. i gotta grab the laundry"

» making an excuse to leave, your heart was beating fast. you knew kita's words were the kind he'd say to anyone, but it made your heart feel fuzzy when he'd look out for you.

» the stone cold captain who you thought he was, actually was so kind. he was just a little awkward like you, and a little blunt with what he said sometimes. but you learned the great qualities he carries and how much he actually cares about others well being. he was a hard worker and you couldnt help but absentmindedly fall for the captain.

» running up the stairs to the second floor of the gym, you felt a shift in your step. head becoming dizzier than it was just 5 minutes ago. legs trembling, you started falling before feeling a presence behind.

» kita's arm wrapped around your waist, supporting you in efforts to not letting you fall over. "i told you to rest l/n san" kita said sternly. "you wont benefit anyone if you keep overworking like this."

» you knew kita was right, but you really didnt want to rest knowing you'll be letting the team down by not working hard.

» "i promise I'll rest as soon as im done with this one thing" pleading with kita. he let out a sigh, knowing you really wouldnt until you did finish so he allowed you to do so.

» finishing grabbing all of the dry jerseys and bringing them downstairs to pass out to everyone, you didnt really notice atsumu and osamu spiking volleyballs at each other until aran yelled

» "y/n! watch out!" honestly, you were too tired to move out of the way so you figured, it do be like that sometimes, and allowed the ball to hit you.

» or... so you had planned the ball to hit you.

» kita stood in front, blocking the impact of the spike that you had prepared yourself for. there was agitation in kita's eyes. more than you usually noticed when then twins were miss behaving. concern washing over, he looked you straight in the eyes

» "... is there something wrong kita san?" lifting up his hand to your forehead, he let out a sigh. "why didnt you tell me earlier you had a fever", then walking over to the coach meanwhile atsumu and osamu come over to apologise for being reckless.

» "get your stuff. we're going home" kita said bluntly.

» "huh? but practice is-"

» "please l/n san. for me"

» kita would only take yes for an answer this time. no if's ands or buts. so here you were, walking home with kita. only the sound of raindrops hitting your shared umbrella being heard.

» muscles starting to ache a little more and your legs becoming more tired than they were when you left the gym, you began to walk a little slower every step

» "get on my back l/n" "its ok kita san, i can walk. its already enough that you're walking me home" "i didnt ask if you wanted to. im telling you to"

» you couldnt tell if it was the fever that made your face warmer or if it was kita's words. nonetheless, you got on kita's back. he was a lot stronger than he looked and you couldnt help but stifen at being so close to your own crush like this.

» "relax. I'll make sure you get home." he reassured. you leaned into his back, warmth seeping in, your eyes began to feel heavy.

» "kita san" "yes?" "thank you for always watching out for me"

» a comfortable silence was met as the sound of rain filled your ears.

» "kita san" "hm?" "did you know..." your voice softened "i like you a lot kita san"

» did he hear you correctly? if he wasnt paying attention he wouldve missed what you had said, being drowed out through the pitter patter of water. now his heart thumping louder than ever before.

» "l/n san-" he was about to go on but was met with the gentle rise and fall of your chest and the soft snores of you on his back, knocked out from exertion. kita let out a light chuckle, finally relieved you were resting.

» you had missed the next day of school, but when you came back the whole volleyball team bombarded you with love.

» "WE'RE A FAILURE TO NOT NOTICE YOU FEELING SICK" atsumu cried. "how could we let our one and only precious manager get ill for taking care of us" akagi, clearly dissapointed in himself. "please let us know when we can take care of you too y/n" aran said.

» "its no big deal. really!" waving your hands in defense. "it was just a small cold. but i do have a question though"

» all the boys gathered around to hear what you had to say

» "how did i get home?? i really dont remember what happened after i almost got hit by atsumu"

» it shocked the guys honestly. you genuinely didnt remember a single thing due to your fever. "wait? you don't remember kita taking you home?" suna replied, your face becoming red. "k-kita san took me home-?" "yah. he left in the middle of practice to do so" osamu added.

» immediately, you got up to find the captain that apparently took you home the other day. he was in the storage closet cleaning and grabbing the equipment for todays practice.

» "kita san" "oh. l/n. glad you're feeling better" his smile brightened the musty closet. "about that, im sorry for troubling you and having you take me home the other day. i honestly dont remember what happened after i almost got hit by atsumu. my mind was really fuzzy that day, but im truly thankful for you going out of your way for me. it really means a lot"

» kita was dumbfounded. you really dont remember? "no need to apologize l/n. it was my responsibility as a captain. and afterall, what good would i be if i couldnt even take care of the person who means the most to me"

» your heart raced. 'person who means the most to me' ? cheeks blushing a rosy pink, you were internally thanking the musty store room from being dim.

» with arms full of equipment, kita walked by you and stopped.

» "by the way l/n san. did you know?"

» ears perking up at the vague yet familiar line

» "i like you a lot too l/n san"

» now we all know sakusa HATES germs and for the past week and a half, he's been telling you to keep up with washing your hands, wearing a mask at all times even when you eat omi it doesnt work like that. pls especially since you are prone to getting sick easily no matter how hygenic you are. your immune system just hated you. PERIODT

» you remembered sakusa scolding you for running out of hand sanitizer and then the next day you were out of commission. bed ridden with laryngitis, cough, slight fever, the whole works. it was like your body was making fun of you or something

» you texted komori, asking him to take notes in class for you and relay homework information while you were at home resting up. but there was one request you had and made komori PROMISE.

» DO NOT TELL SAKUSA YOU GOT SICK

» "he's probably gonna notice your absence y/n. he'll find out about it either way"

» "well if you dont tell him then he wont know. its not like he even cares about where i am like that"

» "thats what you might think. but i know he's gonna say something i can garuntee it"

» the next day at school, sakusa did notice your presence missing. it was quieter not having a 3rd person in the group of friends. not having you around to talk to him when komori was gone.

» pulling out his phone to text you, he asked where you were that day.

» "on a family trip :D !!! forgot to tell you, but I'll tell you all about it when i come back!" you wrote, attaching an old selfie of a different trip you went on to make it more believable.

» you had hoped this silly cold would get better in a day, but soon that day turned into 2 and then 3 and then 4... you pretty much missed the whole week of school at that point

» Friday rolled around and komori was on his phone all day. sakusa noticed his cousin fidget in his chair more than usual and it irked him to see him like that

» "what's with you today?" one eye raised, sakusa finally asked. "uhhh nothing really" komori wasnt very good at keeping secrets lets just start off with that, but he was trying his best.

» "well clearly somethings wrong. you're fidgeting." "well haven't you noticed somethings been different all week?" komori hinted

» sakusa sat there in thought. nothing's been different? he ate the same breakfast he usually does every morning. all his studies have been well. there were no tests this week so there was no reason to be anxious like komori was and even if there was, he would've done well anyways.

» "just tell me what it is." sakusa was starting to get annoyed. "y/n..." komori started. "y/n?" "do you know where she's been this week?"

» did you not tell komori about your family trip? you usually told komori everything, but then again you didn't tell him either until he asked you about it.

» "she said shes on a trip?" he nonchalantly said. komori's eyes started watering. "A TRIP TO THE HOSPITAL THATS WHAT IT IS" he blurted out. komori didnt mean to let it slip , he was just so worried about your well being.

» "hospital?? what are you talking about. did she get injured on her trip?" "no omi. shes been sick all week and her mom just texted me saying she went to the hospital today because shes had a fever for 3 days straight. there is no family trip"

» sakusa's heart shattered. you were sick and didnt even tell him?

» before both he and komori knew it, his legs were running faster to get to the hospital than he had ever imagined he could ever run.

» and there you were. fast asleep in a bed with an IV drip. your face flushed, forehead sweaty and shallow breaths escaping your chapped lips. you were a hot mess but sakusa didnt care. stepping to your bedside to greet your mother she explained to him that she had to go to work and asked if he could watch over you until she gets back.

» sakusa said yes without even hearing the whole thing. his heart and mind saying yes to whatever it took to get you to feel better.

» gosh how he hated hospitals, but what he hated even more was the fact that you were in the hospital and he didnt even know.

» the doctor came in for their evening round and ensured sakusa that you were indeed getting better! your fever had broken not too long ago and your body was working extra hard to heal itself up!

» "is there anything i can do to help?" sakusa asked. he felt helpless in this situation just watching your face distort in uncomfort every now and then, and coughing your lungs out.

» patting sakusa's shoulder, the doctor told him that just being here for you is enough. "you gotta be a strong boyfriend for her alright son? she'll be able to go home tomorrow first thing in the morning if her fever doesnt come back"

» sakusa slumped in his chair at your bedside, the doctors words ringing through his head. 'boyfriend huh?' he thought to himself. "if i was her boyfriend..." he whispered to himself, "i would be a failure for not even knowing my girl was sick..."

» to kiyoomi, you were beautiful. even now in this sad state you were in. deep down he locked these growing feelings he had for you inside of him because he always felt like you were a better match with someone else and after this stunt you pulled of lying to him about going on a family trip, it only made him feel worse.

» it was now night time and you finally began to stir in your sleep, the fever finally gone. sakusa reached out to move some hair that was stuck to your face, fingers tracing the outline of your jaw. your eyes slowly opened and met with his dark orbs.

» "y/n?" "saku- wait this is just a dream. omi wouldn't be here. he hates hospitals" you let out a forced laugh and then a sigh through your sore throat.

» you reached out to sakusa's hands that were resting on the side of your bed. "omi would never let me hold his hand because he'd say im passing germs to him so hopefully dream omi wont be the same" you were aimlessly talking to yourself, not even realizing that this really wasnt a dream.

» he squeezed your hand in return. hoping that you wouldnt let go any time soon. a funny smile appeared on your face just at the thought of him. "even if you're stupid for not realizing how much i like you... i cant wait to see you again omi" you whispered before falling asleep again.

» sakusa didnt know what to do. he sat there frozen in his chair. it was his first time hearing you call him omi. heck. you literally just confessed to the boy. his brain was running wild. groaning in distress he let go of your hand to step out for a breath of fresh air now that you were back asleep.

» it was 5am and your mother came back to the hospital and thanked sakusa for staying by your side. He left in a hurry to make sure you didnt see him there.

» Monday rolled around and sakusa was waiting outside of the school gates for you. he had planned on asking you about your "trip"

» "good morning sakusa!!" your bright and cheery voice rang through his ears. honestly he was trembling inside. the memory of you confessing to him still fresh in his mind.

» "how was your trip?" you stopped dead in your tracks. "haha... it was good !! sorry i forgot to get you a souvenir" you were trying to play it cool but sakusa could tell you were forcing yourself. "i wouldnt want a souvenir from where you came from so its fine" sakusa's words threw you off. "i - im not sure im understanding what you're saying sakusa?"

» you felt a tug on your hand. "dont you mean omi?" his voice husky as he whispered into your ear. cheeks flushed, your brain felt like it short circuted. you've always tried your hardest to not let it slip that you want to call him omi since he hated when people called him that.

» sakusa smirked at your cute reaction he got out of you. letting go of your hand he began to walk into the school leaving you at the gate dumbfounded. "and by the way. you're just as stupid for not realizing how long ive liked you too"

-» ˚⸙͎۪۫⋆

thank you for your order! enjoy~!

#haikyuu x reader #hq fluff #haikyuu fluff #yinny!drabbles #sakusa kiyoomi #sakusa fluff #kita shinsuke #kita x reader #kita fluff

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t0shii · 3 years

Text

hq boys when you're feeling anxious or stressed

suna rintaro, hinata shoyo, oikawa toru x gn!r

!warnings! mentions of anxiety, reader comparing themselves to others, mentions of food & hunger, driving. this is like all fluff no angst rlly tbh.

SUNA RINTARO.

he could tell something was up but conviced himself he shouldnt pry as he had already asked you twice if you were feeling alright, to which you reasurred him with a "yep" both times, it was suspicious but he thought maybe you just wanted to be left alone. meanwhile you weren't sure why you lied him, you obviously were not doing okay at the moment. currently he was driving you home and your anxiety was going absolutely crazy from the amount of school work that was piling up on you, it's unfair you thought to yourself, looking out the window. not only were you stressed from work but trying to keep up with your friend was hard, to say the least. they were phenomenal students, straight As in their transcript and though your grades were just fine, you couldn't help but feel inferior and insecure. it's unfair how effortlessly smart they are and how i'll never be able to catch up.... oh boy if your thoughts weren't running wild before they definitely were now, you hadn't even realized your boyfriend pulling into your driveway until he slightly tapped your shoulder. "are you sure you're alright? i don't wanna pressure you ofcourse but, you know you can tell me anything right?" ... and there were the water works! the little string holding you together had snapped just like that. you sat there in the passengers seat sobbing into your hands and suna rintaro hadn't a clue what to do in the moment.

"give me just a sec" you heard him mumble but not before he gave you a kiss as light as a feather on the top of your head. somehow you didn't notice him exit the car and rush to your side until he opened your door and hugged you so tight you honestly couldn't breathe. after a few seconds your boyfriend let go of the embrace which, to his dismay, only made you cry even harder. now, he knew he was known for being quite... stoic but he was definitely panicking on the inside and it was really difficult to remain calm on the outside. your boyfriend carefully reached over you to unbuckle the seatbelt that you had yet to unclasp. "lets go inside baby." his voice was so gentle it would've taken you by surprise had you not still been crying. you nodded in response and he helped you carefully out of the car, holding your hand all the way to the door, "d'ya have your key?" you nodded trying your best to unlock the door, after a few struggled and shakey attempts you finally had your door unlocked but not without rins help because he couldn't bare to watch you struggle any longer.

stepping inside rin helped you take your shoes off, removing his own after, "bedroom?" having calmed down a little you whispered "yes," with a small nod. he nodded with you in response and took you to your bedroom. after helping you change into comfy clothes he helped you into bed, crawling in right behind you. your back was snug against his chest and he held you super tightly, it was silent for a few minutes until finally he spoke up, "please tell me how i can help" you could feel your lip quiver. "well... you don't have to say anything right now, you know i can wait. i'll even leave if you want, i just wanted you to know that you can tell me whenever you're ready and that i'll listen." neither of you were sure when you'd be ready to admit what had gotten you so upset but you felt comfortable knowing suna rintaro would be there whenever you were ready, whether it be minutes from now or even months.

HINATA SHOYO.

your silence on the walk home was starting to concern him.. maybe im just talking too much... he thought, "hey... im sorry if im talking your ear off.. how was your day angel?" to say he was disappointed with your response would be an understatement. not thar you HAD to talk but usually you were talkative with him and the worry in his tummy was only growing more. a simple, "oh.. my day was alright sho," simply woundn't cut it! "hey, are you feeling okay?" it was silent for a few seconds before you answered a mumbled "i think so, are you feeling alright, sho?" he simply nodded with a "mhm" and you told him to continue on with his story from earlier.

he complied but only to fill the silence. hinata decided to trust you when you said you were okay because you know your own feelings and he knows for a fact he's made it clear before that you could and should let him know if something was bothering you. though you enjoyed listening to hinata's stories you only found yourself getting lost in your own mind whilst he rambled on.you could tell he was suspicious of your behavior but was grateful he had left his curiosity behind because you were sure you would snap if he had asked you if you were okay again, you really didn't want to cry in front of him. truth is, your thoughts were running wild, stressing over the smallest things; assignments due at the end of the week, what you were gonna get your boyfriend for your anniversary, how you were gonna make time for your friends surprise birthday party and helping sho with his studied all the while trying to take care of your own self and keep your own grades afloat. "y/n..? we're at your house.. are you sure your alright? you look a little pale, are you ill?" crap! how had you not noticed you were approaching your own driveway you wanted to slap yourself for being so clueless. you couldn't help but feel horrible for not listening to your boyfriends story also.

"yes sho i'm fine really, i just didn't have time to eat lunch today but i have food inside so don't worry m'may?" he looked at you suspiciously and you knew he was onto you, "y'know y/n, i'm not gonna force you to tell me what's going on but just know i'll always be here for you, okay?" he gave you a small smile before engulfing you into a tight hug, it honestly melted your heart. surprisingly, you didn't start crying on the spot. "y'know, i wanted to trust you when you said you were okay but now i'm not so sure if you were telling the truth," he mumbled into your shoulder. you sighed, giving up the facade. "sho.... i just don't know what to do honestly, i have alot on my plate right now and i'm really stressed with all the responsibilities ive piled onto myself," you admitted. he nodded lifting his head from your shoulder, giving you the brightest smile, "well, i can always help out! i might not be the mooost helpful person ever but i'll try my best, and if anything i'm good moral support!" you giggled at that but suddenly you felt your lip quiver from the sudden guilt you feeling, "i'm sorry for lying to you sho-", "hey! its alright! you dont need to apologize. especially dont need you crying on me now!" he smiled cupping your face in his hands, wiping away a few stray tears of whom managed to escape.

OIKAWA TORU.

you smile back at him and thought of how silly it was that you tried keeping your feelings a secret from your boyfriend of two years, hinata shoyo, feeling glad that you confided in him. he knew you were upset as soon as he saw you that very morning, he could read you like and open book and you knew that fact very well. still though, you tried your best to hide yourself from him, though it was hard considering you sitting right next to him in the passenger seat of his car. finally after a whole day of being worried sick, he was tired of leaving things left unsaid "babyyyy," he sang for you from the kitchen, "please come here a sec!" he yelled for you louder. soon you came trudging down the hallway, blanket wrapped around your body, he couldn't help but smile at how adorable his s/o looked.

"c'mere quickly," he said will a grin, opening his arms for a hug, which you gladly accept, wrapping your arms around his waist tightly. "now, i know you know that i know that you're not feeling well, so please tell me what's got my angel so upset?" he said softly rubbing his hand lightly over your back, his voice a little muffled from his cheek being squished against the top of your head. you let out a breath you hadn't even realized you were holding, "'m sorry tooru, i don't know what's wrong with me today.... just not feeling well." you felt him nod against your head in response, "well good thing your amazing boyfriend is here to make you feel all better huh?" you let a out small giggle at that. "you know you can tell me when you're feeling down right? you shouldn't keep things bottled up inside", "i know tooru... im sorry, i just dont really know wbat i'm feeling so down about though," you admitted shyly. "hey that's okay! there absolutely no need to apologize for that, here, look at me, angel," he tilts your face so you're looking up at him, his big soft hands holding your face, thumbs stroking your cheeks lightly, "i'm here whenever you figure it out, hell, even if you dont figure it out or there just isn't any reason at all. you know i'm always, always, always here. i promise you that, m'kay?" he finishes his little speech with a smile, smothering your face in kisses. you could only feel relieved, thankful and loved. because you knew that you would always have your soulmate, oikawa toru by your side.

( a/n ; ahh so im sorry if this has any spelling or grammatical errors it's sort of late as i'm writing this! and im too lazy to proof read.... also it might just all be word vomit and if it is im so sorry 😩 ++ i'm positive ive kept the reader gn throughout the whole thing but if there are slip-ups i promise i'll do better next time! i rlly wanted to write some hq boys when ur feeling anxious and beyond stressed because i have been MEGA struggling with my own anxiety lately, especially bc of school so i just needed to let my feelings go! anywhooo i hope everyone who reads this has an amazing day or night! ) p.s. im new to writing so be nice 2 me or whatever 😩🙄😌👍🏻

#oikawa x reader #oikawa x y/n #oikawa toru #oikawa headcanons #suna rintaro x reader #suna x reader #suna x y/n #suna rintaro headcanons #hinata shoyo #suna rintaro #hinata x reader #hinata x y/n #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu fluff #rintaro x reader #shoyo x reader #toru x reader #sunni's works 📓

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heyitsyn · 4 years

Text

Manager!Seijoh Part 3

a/n: yall i love seijoh so much like theyre my favorite school and my favorite boys and i know their names by heart and im just so SOFT for them !!!!!

also: yall will find out what other fandom ill be writing for in the future in this one

for more seijoh content, check this masterlist out!

combined two anon requests:

- Could we get the boys reacting to finding out the seijoh manager is quite popular to both genders?? Maybe they over hear a confession?

- Why do I feel like half of the team would be all pouty when word comes around that a guy confessed to manager, the others would probably be annoyed/irritated. Oikawa being all bratty cause no matter what he tried,she never showed ant interest when he flirts. But now this boy comes alone ... (but like you said manager is too focused in school and the team)

MY HEART WAS RIPPED OUT OF MY CHEST AND THROWN INTO A BLENDER WHEN I SAW THIS PART OR JUST WHEN SEIJOH LOST IN GENERAL BC MY BABIES WORKED SO HARD AAAAAAA

oof girl the world is ending

so basically,,,,,

the entire just magically knew about what happened earlier and yahaba’s theory of team telepathy really does work bc not even a minute after it happened, they all spammed you messages and next thing you knew, oikawa was naruto-ing down from the 3rd floor to your class in the first floor

tbh, they shouldve seen this coming yanno?

you were ridiculously pretty and you carried yourself w such elegance and grace that it just seemed to hypnotize everyone into stopping what they were doing and watched you in awe doing the most mundane things like walking or sitting

lmao couldnt be me

your confessions usually happened over letters bc either tol boys kunimi or kindaichi are usually around you at all times so theyre too scared to do anything

hence why your locker was always filled with envelopes yet no upfront public confessions

it ranged from upperclassmen and upperclasswomen who expressed their interest in you and wanted to date you and get to know you better

but tf you dont even know them and you werent about to date a whole stranger

this made the boys a little peeved because you were popular with both the boys and the gals so they were constantly on edge on who was talking to you

it was like having an oikawa 2.0 but not indulging them and pretending theyre not even there

like when you walk to class and sit down, they would flock over and offer you drinks and snacks but you either turned them down or just flat-out ignored them

maybe this was what fueled others on more

your reserved attitude and your refusals made it look like you were playing hard to get and it was almost like a game on who could win the heart of the princess of seijoh

this was proven really difficult because not only do they have your dismissals, you also had guard dogs at every corner and would bite their head off at the slight indication of an interaction

however,,,,

today,,,

this morning,,,,

at 7:53 AM,,,,

they saw you walking down the hallway with a purple-haired boy holding your bag and you giggling at what he was saying

um EXCUSE ME MAAM WHAT

EVERYONE HAS BEEN TRYING TO GAIN YOUR AFFECTIONS FOR MONTHS YET YOU ARE HERE INTERACTING WITH A MALE WHO NO ONE EVEN KNOWS

ESPECIALLY SINCE HE WAS A MALE WHO WAS STANDING RIGHT THERE RIGHT NEXT TO YOU AND HE WASNT A MEMBER OF THE TEAM

!!!!!

and ofc, the boys would immediately know even though theyre spread all over the school

it was kyoken who saw you as he was leaning against your locker and his eyes narrowed before he secretly took a picture and sent it to yahaba, asking if there was a new guy who entered the team while he was away

when he replied with a panicked, ‘NO WHO IS THAT’

kyoken was already advancing to you

yahaba-san immediately sent the picture to the team group chat, that excluded you rood, and oikawa wasted no time and even pushed some fangirls so he could go to you

‘-and she destroyed my sheets’

you laughed at the story and hitoshi stared at you with awe in his eyes

how can someone laugh so beautifully?

like a snort should be considered ugly and gross but it was like cute little squeaks from you and he thought you were like a fairy

‘oh god, i wasnt-’

you were cut off with a hand that held your arm

you came face to face with the glaring face of one of your boys and you immediately turned to him in concern, immediately grasping an arm with the other hand on his cheek to look for any cuts

he rarely comes to you on a normal basis so you thought something was wrong

‘whats wrong, kyo-san? did you get into a fight? do you need me to patch you up?’

he didnt care what you were saying, instead heatedly glaring at this new guy, and grunted a response to agreeing with you going to the nurse

just anywhere to get you away from this,,,, stranger

‘toshi i have to-’

then you were cut off again

‘YYYYY/NNNNNNN-CHHHHHAAAANNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!’

‘OI SHITTYKAWA!’

‘OIKAWA-SAN!’

‘OIKAWA!’

‘CAPTAIN!’

from behind you, 5 tol looming figures were running towards you and next thing you knew, you were in the arms of your captain

‘oikawa-san! what are you doing?!’

oikawa held you tightly against his chest and had his arms tightly around your form to prevent you from being taken away

most of the volleyball team were now circling you and pointedly glaring at the poor boy who was so confused that he wasnt bothered by the death glares

‘oh, its you’

kunimi grumbled

‘kunimi, whats happening?’

hitoshi questioned

you fought away from the hold of oikawa and pushed mattsukawa and hanamaki to stand in front of shinsou hitoshi

‘so sorry about this, toshi. i’ll help you with your room later and ill text you when practice is finished, okay?’

you sheepishly smiled and he nodded, his own smile reassuring you

‘yep. ill see you later then’

‘bye’

you softly said and he turned to walk away

but as soon as he was out of sight, you turned around with a grim looking expression and your hands on your hips, a hard look in your eyes

‘boys, what was that?’

you gritted out

‘y/n-chan! don’t you see?! he was going to take you away! he was an intrude-OW!’

he yelped when you reached up and grabbed his ear before grabbing the other closest who was iwaizumi

they both whined and complained about the ear and slapped your hand but you didnt let up

‘he is a friend, oikawa-san. you have no right on who i can be friends and who i can hang out with because i still have a life outside the team!’

you scolded and the others hung their heads low like puppies

‘sorry, y/n-chan’

oikawa mumbled and iwaizumi also mumbled his apology so you let go of them, dusting off your hands

‘and the rest of you, hold back your captain and dont intimidate him like that!’

‘sorry’

you sighed but ruffled their hair before turning to go to class

‘now, be good boys and dont bother others like this again’

‘yes’

they chorused and you nodded, satisfied

‘ill hold you to it!’

you shouted as you walked down the hallway

when you turned a corner, oikawa grabbed kunimi by the arms

‘you know him, dont you? who is he? what class? address? mother’s name? father’s name? age-’

‘oi stop it, shittykawa’

but despite that, iwaizumi looked at the younger, expecting answers as well

kunimi sighed

‘thats shinsou hitoshi from class 1-3. we have gym together’

and ‘we’ was kunimi and you since you were both in the same class so you constantly saw this shinsou boy?

nuh uh, dont think so, francisco

from the looks of it, you were still single and there was a pining from shinso’s part, maybe yours they dont know

and they were going to do everything in their power to keep you away from him

this was excused to them as protecting their manager from someone else and they werent going to let you be taken by someone else

during practice, they grilled you over your relationship with him

‘i honestly dont know why this is your business but if you must know, his adoptive father, aizawa-san, is my mother’s co-worker and i usually catsit for them. dont worry, we’re not dating. just friends, that’s all’

but they know it wasnt just a friendship type of situation

so when the 4 third years saw you being confessed to by this ‘friend’ outside, they almost toppled out the window as they tried to listen to what was being said

‘shittykawa get off my back!’

‘nuh uh! i want to see clearly!’

‘everyone needs to know that code red is happening!’

yall what

mattsun took a picture and sent it to the gc about their princess being confessed to

no one replied, possibly too upset or too busy sulking

kyoken actually had to be excused outside bc he was glaring at everyone and everything and the teacher and students were so scared that they had to take him out of class

they were even more peeved when you just walked in like nothing happened

you didnt mention the confession to anyone else the whole day and when you entered the gym, it was very tense

the coaches even looked confused

‘did you guys fight?’

you questioned but no one answered

kunimi and kindaichi were playing with a ball and glaring at it as it hit the floor

the 2nd years yes including kyobabie were pouting to the side

the 3rd years looked annoyed and pissed off

overall just not seijoh babie vibes

i am uncomfortable with the energy we have created in the gym today🧚✨

‘hey’

you gently said and walked to the captain to figure out what was going on

‘oikawa-san, what happened?’

‘are you dating him now, y/n?’

the seriousness in his voice shocked you and you took a step back in surprise

your expression made him think that you did accept the confession and he scoffed before walking away and doing a jump serve that sounded like a canon blasting

but you were actually confused and surprised that they even knew bc you were sure it was a secluded area where no one could see you

‘dating,,,? dating who?’

you asked to them and the 3rd years just knitted their eyebrows

‘dont play coy, y/n-chan’

oikawa hissed

‘no matter how many times i flirted or asked you on dates, you never said yes. never agreed or even showed a little bit of interest. on me!! your captain!!! but now!!! this little grape boy comes along and you suddenly start dating just because he has cats! what kinda bias is this?!’

he started ranting and whining and being a brat that you pinched his nose shut

‘oi, oikawa-san, are you jumping to conclusions again? first the hickey accident and now this?’

he made a whining noise for you to let go and rubbed his nose when you finally let go

you turned around to face the others and you sighed, massaging your temples

‘everyone, who spread this misunderstanding?’

no one pointed to anyone but their gazes settled on the thick eyebrow boy that you were sure wouldnt have ratted you out

a noise of surprise and betrayal escaped from you as mattsun quickly scrambled to get everyone to stop staring at him

‘MATTSUN-SAN! YOU-!’

you pointed at him and mattsun rushed forward to grab your hands before holding them close to his chest

‘y/n-chan, we just saw you when we were passing! it was makki who wanted to tell the others!’

the betrayal made iwa laugh but makki ran up to kick mattsun to the side

‘youre the one who committed the deed! i was merely suggesting it! it was iwaizumi who wanted to watch them first!’

‘IWA-SAN!’

you gasped at the normally chill third year and you didnt expect him to be the one who started it first

iwa panicked and held his hands out cautiously

‘y/n-chan, understand that i was just worried and i didnt want you to be outside by yourself after what happened, okay? i didnt know he was confessing to you’

you closed your eyes and pinched the bridge of your nose tightly

‘again! whoever and whatever happens in my love life is my business! mine! and only mine! you cannot control it and get angry at ME because i do want a boyfriend and i do want to experience dating bc i want to know how it feels to be loved like that! so i wont let a bunch of children stop me from having that!’

the third years shared a look before they they gave up and nodded in defeat

but oikawa was the most offended

‘Y/N-CHAN! I ASK YOU ON DATES ALL THE TIME AND I ALWAYS OFFER TO GIVE YOU THAT LOVE SO WHY CAN’T IT BE ME?! WHAT DOES THAT GRAPE HUMANOID HAVE THAT I DONT?!’

he whined and stomped his foot after crossing his arms and a pout on his face

you shook your head, not even bothering to answer that, and went to the others

‘dont be mad and be upset, okay? i refused him bc i have no time for a relationship when im too busy looking after my own boys. i really dont want to add another’

kindaichi and yahaba’s face scrunched as they rushed forward to hug you

‘we thought you would leave us y/n-chan!’

‘stay as ours forever, okay?’

you were so relieved that they werent as aggressive as the oldests and gave each player their own favorite hugs

but you stopped in front of kyo, not really knowing how to hug him since youve never exactly showed any type of affection like that

so you were just awkwardly standing there with raised arms but he patted your head, you smiling and leaning more to his touch

‘hm, kyo-san, ya finally warming up to me?’

you teased but he scoffed, gently headbutting you with his forehead against yours

‘now, everyone! dont misunderstand and know that for as long as i will be a manager, i wont be in a relationship bc my time as a manager is too crucial since i would probably have to look after you so you dont get yourself to jail. a boyfriend is adding more boys in to that list and i dont want that. you will be my boys forever and i wont be taken from you so please trust on me and stop being so overprotective bc i wont give them the affection or wishes they want!’

oikawa teared up and was about to go trample you but he was held back

‘no! i want a hug! i want a family hug! cmon, iwa-chan!’

practice went by quickly but you demanded them to do 10 diving laps in punishment for all the misunderstandings theyve created

but they gladly did it bc it meant that you wont be taken from them and you would be theirs forever and their cute manager is going to pay attention to them and them only

i got serious yandere vibes from this but its so heartwarming that theyre so overprotective and lowkey you got yourself a harem

after practice, they all wanted to walk home with you but you told them that shinsou’s house was the other direction

‘y/n-chan! you said you wouldn’t-’

you rolled your eyes

‘oikawa-san, just because i refused that confession doesnt mean i will stop earning money. i still have to catsit for his family and earn my money!’

they only agreed when kyo said that he was walking that way too but they were still weary and jealous bc he got to spend more time with you than them

as you were both walking, you looked up at him

‘kyo-san, what type of hug do you like?’

‘hah?’

he looked down at you bc we short with wide eyes and flushed cheeks

you smiled and looked forward, skipping slightly

‘everyone in the team has their own special hugs. i want everyone to have one bc you all are individually special to me so-’

but he stopped walking and pulled arm before he lifted you up, making you squeak and wrap your legs around his waist

thank god you were wearing your tracksuit and not your skirt

‘k-kyo-san?’

bruh is it obv that kyoken is one of my favorite seijoh boys like bls love on him

he didnt want you to see his flustered expression bc he still has a reputation to uphold, yanno?

so he tucked it in your neck and you softly smiled before playing with the baby hairs at the base of his neck

‘you like this kind then, kyo-san? kinda aggressive but perfectly suits you, yanno?’

he just grunted and you laughed

he wasnt about to tell you that he liked holding you on his arms bc you were so tiny and so you that holding you like this makes him feel like he was protecting you and feel good about himself bc he gets to be the one who shields you from the world

yuhhhhh get it kyo

‘so yahaba-san told me that you got kicked out of class bc you scared the teacher and kids?’

you questioned and he left his spot on your neck and pulled his face back so you could clearly see his face

it was red and possibly flustered but you just snickered

he still held you by his strong arms so you were able to move your small hands to his face where he flinched at first but relaxed when you touched his cheeks

your fingers gently pulled the sides of his lips and you tilted your head to the side

‘you,,, look really handsome when you smile, kyo-san’

you whispered and he was so surprised that his tough mask fell and was replaced by wide eyes and his eyebrows rose up, the intimidating look disappearing from his eyes

‘i-i do?’

you bit your lip bc this was so different from the aggressive kyo you knew and you didnt expect this type of innocence that he just showed you

maybe he wasnt so innocent from the fights and arguments he has started or been in

but he was so innocent to soft touches and compliments bc he wasnt exposed to it, only used to the ones that were said due to the aura he exuded or his looks

‘yep, you do. so keep smiling for me, kay? dont have to be around the others or all the time, but i,,, want to see it sometimes’

he blinked at you but quickly went back to your neck to hide the big smile that was threatening to come out

you felt his lips move and you laughed

‘noooo! kyo-san!!! i want to see your smilee!!! dont hide it!!!’

but it was cut short when a familiar shout was heard from the other side of the street that was near the school

it seemed that oikawa was worried about you walking alone with kyoken so he followed you both with the other third years

‘kyoken-chan! y/n-chan!’

he shouted in betrayal

you were about to get away from kyo’s hold but he tightened his grip and leaned in to place a kiss on your forehead, still staring straight at the captain

‘mine’

again, do you know what happened next?

oikawa screamed

this was actually pretty funny to write bc wowza oikawa is so oikawa and hes just so oikawa-like, yanno? and im still simping over kyoken and shinsou is my ult fave in bnha and i really love him like ugghhhh :’)

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sapphicmsmarvel · 3 years

Text

Ghost Of You

song for this fic: ghost of you

hp masterlist

regular masterlist

Big TW for drug addiction, suicide, grief.

I wrote this after my sister's death in march, the exact same cause.

I was just able to finish this three months later, the ending is so abrupt because I don’t know what life is like after this kind of grief.

We may have disliked each other, but she was still my older sister.

This is how I'm able to cope, read it or not. Fanfic has saved my life many times and has helped me deal with losses.

harry potter was the only thing that got me through that, and that is still getting me through that.

-Fred admired the fact that you loved Ginny as if she were your own sibling.

-As far as he knew you were an only child.

-No matter what, you immediately would drop anything to help Ginny.

-When Fred and George befriended you their first year, they mentioned they have a little sister so you knew of her existence when she came to Hogwarts (as well as Ron but he’ll get his own chapter).

-Fred and George introduced you two, the twins would never admit it out loud but they were worried about her. She’s the baby of the family.

-Pretty soon you two had inside jokes, a secret handshake and were able to communicate just by looks.

-When Fred was dealing with his feelings for you, Ginny called him out on his shit. “Just ask her out.”

“Gin, do you really think she’ll feel the same?”

“I can neither confirm nor deny what I know.” Was her only response as she walked away.

-He confessed later that day.

-12 year old Ginny was a matchmaker for two clueless sixteen year olds.

-Fred quickly realized that Ginny looked up to you.

-It made his heart warm.

-But then he realized something.

-You and him were getting ready for dinner at your home.

When he turned to you, “Sweetheart?”

“Yes?” You turned to Fred.

“I know I’ve never asked you this. But I just realized, some girls I've dated, they immediately would kind of shun Ginny, why did you take to her so quickly?”

“You were my best friend, why would I reject your younger sister?”

“Even then, why?”

You sighed. “I never had a good relationship with my older siblings. Hell, they’re out there right now and I’ve never mentioned them to you.”

“Why?”

“For a reason.” Was all you said. “They abandoned me. My sister she…” You shook your head. “I was expected to raise her two children whenever I was home at the age of fourteen. Notice how I was always stressed at the end of a school year or going home for a holiday?”

“Yeah.”

“It was because I was helping take care of her children. My parents also raised them. But for some reason, every time she got addicted to drugs again, that expectation went to me. To be their mother. Nobody wanted her to clean up her act, they assumed that I would be the one to take care of them.”

“What’d your sister do?” He sat next to you.

“What didn’t she do?” You sighed, setting down the photos your Mum sent. “Addicts, they deserve so much help. But then there's my sister, who goes to rehab even though her plan was to get addicted again because she wants to please her parents rather than actually get clean for her children.” You shook your head, “sorry to get so angry, I just hate the people who give mental illnesses a bad name.”

He held out his hand, you grasped it. “When my magic developed, it was the same dynamic as Lily Potter and her sister. We were close and then...I had magic. There was a chance I wouldn’t because of the fact that my dads a muggle and my mums a witch. Whereas, my brother and sister are technically my half siblings, so they are muggles. When they learned of the Wizarding World, they were excited. New things, magic, blah, blah.” You swallowed.

“Then when I was ten, my brother got up and walked out of my life, never giving a reason. My sister's addiction was hidden for another four years after that. That’s when the chaos started.”

He nodded and kissed your cheek. You took a deep breath, “I’m honestly glad you asked, my dad texted me, she’s gonna be there tonight.”

He swallowed, “we’re a team alright? Give a signal and we’ll leave.”

“What’s the signal?”

“Uh,” he searched for something. “Say Georgie texted you, that he fucked some shit up I don’t know.” He laughed.

You laughed, “I will.” He kissed you forehead.

-The dinner did not go well.

-It ended with a horrible fight between your sister and you. So badly that Fred was worried it was about to turn physical. He sat with your nieces, the three of them watching nervously as the bullets of your words slammed into one another.

-That’s when your sister said they were leaving, took her kids and left. Your dad was furious at you, blaming you for the fight when it was your sister who threw the first dagger.

You sighed, and looked at Fred, “forgot to tell you, Georgie texted me earlier.”

-On the drive home, he held your hand. There was no sound coming from either of you, no music as the car flew to your apartment in Diagon Alley.

-You both walked in your shared apartment, you walked to the bathroom immediately, he got ready for bed. He was worried. You had never been so silent before.

-You walked out of the bathroom and joined him on the bed. “I’m sorry.” You whispered. “What for?”

“For making you endure that stupid fight.”

“Never apologize for standing your ground.” He kissed your cheek.

“I love you.” You said.

“I love you too, how about we go to the Burrow tomorrow, have the day with some family and relax. We can head over tomorrow morning.”

“They won't mind?”

“Like our family needs an excuse.” He wrapped you in his arms and you two dozed off.

-And then while you were at the burrow, you got a text message.

It was the worst day of your life.

Call me sweetheart.

It was your mom, you excused yourself to a greenhouse the Weasleys had added to their house. You called her:

“Mum? What’s up?”

“She's dead, sweetheart.”

“What?” Your heart stopped, you knew in your gut who it was. You knew but yet, you still had hope she wasn’t gone.

Your mother then confirmed your worst fear, that your sister was dead.

You numbingly agreed to your Mums idea of coming home for a couple weeks. And then said you needed a moment.

Your Mum agreed. While your sister wasn’t even her child, she felt for you.

You set your phone down on the glass table and sat down on the wicker couch.

You held your head in your hands.

You had a horrible fight with her the night before, she died thinking you hated her. She died thinking there would be no hope for your relationship.

She died thinking her little sister wanted her gone.

Damnit. Damnit. Damnit.

Your memories began to play on autopilot, of what she was like before the addiction, of being happy and actually having a relationship with each other.

Oh god, her kids.

Before your mind could spiral anymore, you felt a hand on your shoulder. You looked up with tears in your eyes at Fred, who immediately wrapped you in his arms.

“What is it?”

“She’s gone.” You whispered. You weren’t sobbing, your tears were a constant river down your cheeks.

“Who, love?”

Then you said your sister's name, and he squeezed you tighter. You felt him press kisses to your hair.

After 30 minutes, his twin came looking. Fred immediately sheltered you away from the eyes of someone else. Fred began whispering to George what had happened.

Your phone began to buzz with messages, you silenced your phone immediately.

Fred walked over as George stood in the doorway in complete shock. “Georgies gonna distract the family while you head upstairs. I’ll talk to them.”

You nodded, he kissed your cheek.

You numbly walked up to Fred and George’s room to hide away from people to deal with your feelings. You crawled into Fred’s bed, enjoying the warmth and the smell of cinnamon that drowned your senses.

About thirty minutes later, you heard a knock on the door, you did not have the energy to turn around. It opened.

“Y/N/N?” Ginny's gentle voice whispered the nickname only she could call you.

“Hey Gin.” You whispered, not turning around.

You heard the door shut, then you heard her soft footsteps as she walked to the bed. You felt the bed dip as she sat down. “Sister time?”

You nodded and turned around, she immediately laid down next to you, she pulled a blanket on top of you two. You two were facing each other.

“Fred told you I assume?” You laughed without any humor behind it.

She nodded, “they told us all.”

“How did George distract you?”

She rolled her eyes, “the idiot ran outside and slipped in mud so we’d all go find him and laugh or help out.”

Your laugh cracked as it left your mouth. “He looked scared when he found Freddie and I.”

“We thought you guys were fighting.” She admitted.

You huffed a laugh through your nose. She asked, “are you okay?”

“I dont know.” You said helplessly. “We didn’t have a good relationship, her and I. I’m more emotionally drained right now. I cried it all out in Fred’s arms earlier. At least she’s not in pain anymore.” You said sadly. “Addiction is a true mental illness, I wish more people cared about these people.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I have no idea how to respond to I’m sorries so imagine I'm sending you heart emojis right now.”

She nodded. “Do you need me to do anything?”

“No, unless you can respond to my extended family texting me right now with their useless prayers and words.”

“I can if you want me to.”

“Oh yeah? What will you say?”

“Stop shoving words down her throat and let the girl breathe.”

You two giggled, “I have half a mind to let you do that.”

“Say the word and it’s done.”

“I love you, Gin.”

“I love you too.”

The two of you continued to talk, about your sister and what happened between you two. About a quidditch match, anything.

The morning of the funeral, Freddie sat down next to you on the twin bed you two had to share at your parents house.

“What’s on your mind?”

“I think I've figured out the worst part of this situation.”

“What?”

“That we’ll never know if it was a suicide or not.”

He gripped your hand tighter.

At the funeral, you had Ginny holding one hand, and Fred holding the other. The other Weasley’s were all in attendance, even Percy. Fleur came out with Bill as well as Charlie.

You didn't realize how concerned every single Weasley sibling was. Percy had never seen you so stoic, Fleur and Bill had never witnessed you be so withdrawn, Hermione and Ron have never seen you so emotionless, so cold to your surroundings. George was concerned for his new sister, Ginny was feeling for you, her best friend. Harry was grieving for you, his older sister figure.

Fred hated seeing you so unlike yourself.

Her kids sat with their step-siblings. So you sat with the Weasleys. Molly and Arthur cried, not just for your sister, but they knew you lost a piece of yourself with her that you’d never get back.

Your father and you had never had a lovey relationship, even with his daughter dead, your guard was so high up you couldn’t bring it down to give an affection to anyone but Freddie.

Your older sister's funeral was an event that you had not planned for.

You would now grow older than your older sister.

-After the funeral you and the girls were in your bedroom. Fred knew you needed some girl time. The boys and parents were downstairs with yours.

“I don’t know where to go from here.” You admitted.

They all looked at you in response, you continued. “Even though we didn’t like each other, I always thought she’d be there.” You felt the painful prickle of tears. You sniffed. Ginny reached for your hand.

With your free hand, you gestured to the bag in the corner. “That’s her bag, I have to go through that. I can’t make my parents do it.”

“We’re here for you.” Hermione said.

“I can still feel her, like her ghost is following me everywhere.” You confessed.

“I wish we had another chance at being sisters.”

The ending is so abrupt because I can’t relive the feelings I had after my sister's death. The last line of this sums it up though.

#Harry Potter #slytherin #fred weasley #fred weasley x you #fred weasly x reader #fred weasley x y/n #fred weasley x slytherin!reader

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vesuvian-american · 4 years

Note

Could you please do some hcs for all 6 with an Mc who’s chronically ill ? (currently recovering from surgery w your awesome soft headcanons)

I know this was sent super duper long ago, i’m so sorry for ever making you wait, but i’m hoping you’re better and i’m glad my headcanons a were there for you! 💗

Asra:

Asra does all he can to help you recover but i feel like bc of the trauma he experienced with your death before, he’ll start to withdrawal and distance himself a bit

He tries magic to make you comfortable he calls on Julian, he asks Nadia for favors but when you need him to just lay with you for a bit and spend time together he’ll find an excuse to bolt

At least at first, you’ll voice your concerns and he’ll kick himself figuratively forever neglecting you like that

You understand how he must feel so you both move on from that fairly quick, he never leaves your side again, and you love him for it.

Doctors stay close, Muriel drops off eggs, whoever he needs will help with anything he can’t do, just so he can’t stay within your reach for as long as you need

Nadia:

An entire wing of the palace is dedicated to you and your medical needs

Doctors and nurses from all over are called to look you over and treat you to no avail, you can only be made comfortable

But even so, the foot traffic to you room never slows. Nurses and servants tend to your every need, and Nadia spends all the time that she can with you

That is until she’s pulled away to her duties as Countess

She has her headaches, and her temper can, and does flair but she’s just stressed over you.

If you feel even a bit suffocated being cooped up inside all day she’ll be sure to take time off no matter what to take you on a walk around the grounds of the palace

Her sisters come to keep you company of her Nadias duties become too important, but there’s never a night where you two don’t bathe together and sleep

Julian:

Julian treats you to the beta of his ability at first, nothing seems to work for a while but he pushes any negative thoughts to the back of his mind

The longer this mystery illness lasts though he starts feeling a bit in denial about it all

“Oh it’s nothing serious my darling, it’s just a flu i encountered once abroad! You’ll be in top top shape in no time my dear!”

You try time and time again to tell him you think it’s something more and he hears you, he just doesn’t want to believe it.

It isn’t until he notices the small changes in you, paper skin, no appetite, weight changes, that’s when he finally calls for Nazali to take over and for himself to just be there for you as your partner

You think he almost spends too much time tending to your needs but there’s no way you could ever ask him to stop, he keeps you at peace

Muriel:

Muriel notices quickly that you’re sick, almost before you do

You seem just a tad bit slower at the daily chores and suddenly aren’t really in the mood for the eggs he cooks

He’s quick to tell Asra, he can’t handle this alone, whatever it is

Even before it seems serious he’s already wishing it were him and not you, he’s hoping this doesn’t last long he doesn’t know how much his heart can take

He wants more than anything for you to get healthy soon, and he doesn’t think that’ll happen in his damp, muddy hut

He moves you back to the shop and immediately leaves back to the woods, he doesn’t want to be in the way and he doesn’t want you to see him worked up

He feels his mood could make you feel worse, and he feels guilty, “you’re not used to the woods of course you’d get sick” he thinks

Asra talks to him per your request, even though he was going to do that anyway, he guides Muriel back to the shop and never allows him to leave, and Muriel finds, he couldn’t imagine leaving you anyhow

He apologizes and he’s forever holding your hand, he’s strict, he makes sure you eat and stay hydrated, and he’ll do it for as long as he needs to

Portia:

You tell Portia later than you should have that you think somethings wrong, and as much as she hates to ask for help, Portia runs to Nadia for aid

Portia is reluctant to move you into the palcace but if it’ll help you feel better, she’ll agree, she always making you warm hearty soups to heal you up

Mazelinka visits from time to time to, to bring by some soups of her own, and help Portia deal with her emotions

Portia won’t admit it but it’s tearing her up inside seeing you so down, and Mazelinka knows how she feels, she’s taking care of Portia, while Portia takes care of you

Portia stayed a few nights alone at her cottage but rarely caught any sleep, on the third night she took whatever she could carry and brought it to the room you were staying in so you both could be together through it all

She was pardoned of her work during this time so you two never spent a second apart, Nadia didn everything she could to help you and Portia and it was appreciated

Lucio:

Lucio probably felt the most denial about you being sick, he didn’t want to believe anything was actually wrong

But even though he didn’t think it was so serious, he still called in the best doctors from abroad just to confirm his suspicion that you were just fine

He didn’t take the news well, that you were ill, very ill, but he looked to the bright side, you’re cool and strong, you’ll beat this in no time and you both can get on with your lives

Any doctor he hired he wouldn’t allow to leave the palace, they all moved in where they could and tending to you 24 hours a day, he neglected any work he should have been up to and waved off any servant that tried to grab his attention and take him anywhere away from you

To hell with his responsibilities, he’s only worried about you and he’s not take his eyes off you, not for a second, Nadia will help when she can and talk sense into him when you ask but he’s stubborn

So stubborn in fact that he never really lets up when it comes to you and your comfort, always going above and beyond, it’s endearing but you don’t want him to tire himself out tending to you, you don’t want him to wats who’s time with you

But he waves you off, sternly he tell you about when he was sick, he’d give anything to have someone spend time with him like this, “I know how it feels, please dont make me leave” He hated being alone during that time

When he’s not with you, he feels like he’s the one that’s sickly, he needs to you keep him sane and grounded, he’ll go mad if he’s not 100% sure himself that you’re okay and happy as you can be, you welcome it, and after that heart to heart you had about his past ailment with the plague, you’ve bonding on another level

You realize you never truly wanted him to leave you, you’re happy and content, he’s strong for the both of you

#the arcana #the arcana game #main 6 #headcanon #headcanons #angst #fluff #asra #nadia satrinava #julian devorak #muriel #portia devorak #lucio #chronic illness #hc #asks #ask #request #requests

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freebooter4ever · 3 years

Text

i’ve seen the discussion going back and forth on boundaries and sexual objectification, and i don’t have much to add to the conversation other than to say everyone is allowed to determine their OWN ‘lines’ and just because we don’t vocalize them doesn’t make them any less valid. but here’s the limits i set for my blog if anyone feels it is important for them to know (<3):

personally I consider ‘characters’ fair game for anything goes, with ‘public personas’ a little more iffy. ‘RPF’ isn’t new - it just takes on a new more accessible/visible form nowadays. i remember reading my first fic about a ‘real person’ back in my LOTR fandom days - it was a story in first person perspective about the main character meeting orlando bloom on a plane before he was ‘famous’. like a lot of these types of stories, it wasnt so much about the person as it was about the meet cute. the actor was just a convenient placeholder with a handsome face and some personality quirks thrown in to make the romance/dialogue more specific. i personally dont read much xReader fic nowadays, but mostly only cause i’m an old fart who can’t relate to the ‘you’ format. i miss the good old days when people actually created OC’s and then inserted them into things LOL. but also LOL if you think i’ve gone an entire year of quarantine without some imagined personal fantasies of joe mazzello (or steve aoki in the years before)(ramilicious can attest to this. she can also attest to most of these fantasies ending in friendship rather than anything explicit cause that’s just how i roll these days lol). the line i draw is i would never post these types of fics in a place where the subject could accidentally find them - you have to go looking for this stuff on tumblr, most fics are given explicit ratings and under read-mores. with the blacklist tags it’s pretty easy to filter things out. its even easier to add filters to ao3 searches. i am NOT going to do something like message steve aoki and say ‘yeah i watched that movie Ibiza like five times, here is my 1k fic where you’re the dj and i’m the one night stand’. but obviously people still enjoy imagining scenarios like these otherwise movies like Ibiza wouldn’t exist?

for art, i consider anything already on display up for grabs, we all know a certain person’s ass is all over the place...all you have to do is google ‘need for speed’ and rami’s name. HOWEVER, in the case of actors i personally would not draw anything more explicit than what’s already there. i’m not gonna draw full frontal nudity for rami (unless he gifts us with it in a movie, i suppose) or anyone. this is 100% a personal choice for me.

i was a sophomore or junior in college when i volunteered as a figure drawing monitor where i’d time the nude model’s poses and help them set up the stage and lighting and such. there was this one guy in his mid forties probably, a regular who came every week, and i always thought of him fondly till one day (the day after i ran into my Hot Programming TA during dinner and later sent him an email begging him to go on a date with me because i was desperate for kissing experience)(and Hot Programming TA emailed me back within minutes saying yes) this artist guy who i saw all the time and thought i knew fairly well, decided to draw me instead of the model. which would have been fine except he drew me naked. i was NOT naked at the time, i was wearing a shirt, and a bra, and a full prairie skirt with alternating calico and floral patterns. he drew what he imagined was underneath all that. he came up to me after the figure drawing session and showed me his drawings and told me i had been ‘glowing’ and my response was to laugh it off awkwardly and get the hell out of there as soon as i gave the model their pay check. but inwardly i was thinking a) i was NOT glowing for this creepy man twice my age and b) i did NOT give him consent to sexualize my body under my clothes and then SHOW me that objectification. i never said anything to him or anything else, i continued to be the monitor, and i continued to field off creepy advances from him including multiple job offers, but when i finally realized i could just...stop..and i passed the student volunteer monitor job on to my friend naeem, i also realized that what that older male artist did was NOT ok in my book. and it was probably not something he would do while naeem was monitoring.

nowadays im working in an industry that regularly objectifies female bodies. in the past year alone i have had to deal with requests to make breasts bigger, i have been given character rigs that in addition to the usual elbow, knee, and spine joints also have ‘nipple’ joints but ONLY for the women (to make them jiggle for animation), every time i send out a female pose i get it back with notes that push it further into the sexy type of body language reserved for women (twist the spine more! sway the back more! give it ‘energy!’), i have been told to erase wrinkles and fat and pores but ONLY for the women (men you ADD pores bc realism! and manliness!) and this is all me working for a company that is actually fairly progressive in terms of sexism compared to OTHER studios.

like it or not, sexual objectification is a huge part of specifically women’s lives and how we react to that is our business. for me, turning the tables and putting men on display feels like fair’s fair. i cant stop the men from doing it, so if i want to enjoy sexualizing male bodies, damn it im gonna! like dang it, boy do i want to send steve aoki a thank you note every time he posts a video of himself doing those ice baths during the sunset golden hour bc holy shit gorgeous or working out in his gym wearing VERY little clothes, but i dont because i know what its like when someone imposes their personal fantasies on the subject. or, god, there was that time i had to unfollow nicole’s insta for a while bc i had a very explicit dream about her and realized, shit, i need to take a break and get my emotions under control before i can refollow. and god some of the stuff i see dudes sending her during her live videos on mental illness/meditation is TOTALLY gross and not something they should be confronting her with. and she’s not even ‘famous’ famous. or how some fans send their idols explicit direct messages without consent. THAT feels inappropriate to me.

a part of me feels like i shouldn’t have to defend this. men don’t. they’re even encouraged in mass media to sexualize women. but i also recognize the importance of talking about consent. the importance of recognizing that a celebrity deserves to have their boundaries respected. these are my lines in fandom. other people have different lines they won’t cross, and that’s okay to me. i block or blacklist any blogs or tags i think go over the top.

heck, even in fandom-only spaces i still try to keep my own more sexual fantasies off this blog and only in private messages with my friends and mutuals, and i feel like that might come across as unintentionally prudish or judgmental sometimes. i’m not ‘horny on main’ very often. but like...every time i reblog that particular ‘washing machine’ gif of joe mazzello am i thinking about him naked and thinking about how he’s got very loooooong feet, and ‘gee i wonder if that means /other/ things are Too Big for my tastes’ but also ‘gosh wouldnt that make a pretty picture to draw’???? hell yeah.

i dont know who is gonna actually read this essay but yolo i guess :)

#journal shit

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agent-ccarter · 4 years

Text

same room | sirius black

Summary: After you and Sirius break up, your friends keep you apart to stop arguments. (START OF SERIES)

Warnings: Angst!!!, Swearing maybe, blaspheming, cigarettes.

Pairing: (I tried to make it a gender neutral reader!!) Y/N x MaraudersEra Girls, Y/N x Sirius

same room | even if its a lie | please, let me get what I want

(Can we just imagine Bill with long hair please cos tbh im really sick of using ben barnes as the face claim for Sirius 😂)

*****

When we can't even be in the same room My friends are making sure I don't see you I strategize a path to the bathroom So I don't walk past you

*****

There were days where Hogwarts felt cold and empty, regardless of the season. Where everything seemed bigger and more intimidating, the air was thicker and it was harder to breathe. And, no matter how much you curled up under your sheets, or snuggled up near the fireplace, it was impossible to break free of the unnerving feeling. Today was one of those days. The sun was remarkably bright for early December, and the light dusting of snow on the ground was quickly melted.

“Come on, Y/N. Let’s move to the library, it seems like you’ve been on that sofa for days.’ You gave Lily a hard glare in response, shrugging the blanket over you shoulders.

“Stop moping.” Marlene was always a reliable source of hard truths, and today wasn’t an exception. She pulled the blanket from your arms and you moaned, grabbing after it.

“Off we go.”

“Lils, stop it-“ you fought back, struggling in the girls grip to no avail; she was deceptively strong, “Ok, ok I’m coming.”

If it was difficult to function in the common room, then it was almost unbearable outside. The portraits on the walls seemed to gossip almost as much as the other students, and the typically short walk to the library felt like hours away. You were sure you’d come across the boys at one point, as your friends formed a shield around you and started discussing things none of you had even mentioned before.

“i’m not an idiot.” You broke the silence amongst the girls.

“What did you say?” You knew your statement carried power as Lily even removed her head from the potions book she hadn’t looked up from for an hour. You’d will the tears from your eyes if there were any there, but you weren’t upset, you were bored. Logically, the breakup of yourself and Sirius would cause a rift in your tight knit group, you knew that, but you’d never expected this.

“I’m sick of it. I know, I know you guys are trying to help but this isn’t normal! Sirius and I have to put aside out differences, we can’t keep going on like the other doesn’t exist. And you can’t either! The boys are your friends too, it isn’t fair.”

“I don’t know, i’m quite enjoying the lack of attention from Potter.” Lily retorted, but the look you shared showed she was just trying to bring some humour.

“I love you all. I know your’e trying to help. But this is between us two, we need to sort it out.” Marlene didn’t argue; she missed the boys, but especially Sirius, the two were practically inseparable. Lily, as much as she didn’t want to admitted, clearly missed the unwavering attention of James, and most importantly, you missed your friends. You missed the hours of conversation about books with Remus, the teasing from James, Peter’s kind nature. And god did you miss Sirius Black.

“I’m going for a walk.” Standing abruptly from your chair, you pulled your big red jumper over your head and started towards the door. Lily stood up behind you, but you heard Marlene say don’t and the redhead retaking her seat.

Unsuprisingly, the Scottish winter air had turned even colder as the night, and when you sat, legs dangling over the edge of the astronomy tower you were sure you’d be stuck there till the weather warmed. Your breath was visible in the cold, and it was so eerie quiet you were sure the footsteps behind you would echo all the way across the lake.

When Sirius sat beside you, a content silence filled the air, and you realised this was the closest you’d been to each other without an argument or sheer awkwardness. He lit a cigarette between his fingers before flashing the box at you, taking one gratefully yourself. Sure, you could set something larger alight for more permanent warmth, but the tiny stick in your hands offered an appreciated reprieve from the cold.

“How are you?” You offered, in an attempt to diminish the silence. Your retort offered a scoff from the dark haired boy, whose face was covered by the huge mop of curly hair. If he’d have lifted his head, you’d be able to see the dark bags under his eyes that mimicked your own, the almost permanently tear stain cheeks and the slightly blood stained lips from his constant biting.

“We haven’t spoken in weeks and our first conversation begins with ‘How are you?’” His voice was more gravelly than usually, and as he spoke it almost sounded like his thought had been left red raw. Your brain almost crafted the word ‘Good’ in your thoughts buy you quickly shook it away. Yes, he’d hurt you, but it hurt you almost equally to hear him in such a bad way.

“By all means, give it a try, Sirius.”

“I don’t know, you’ve always been better at keeping the conversation going, haven’t you?”

“Jesus,” you sighed under you breath, almost grimacing, “I don’t even know why I bothered, if you're going to be awful i’m just going to go.” You crushed you cigarette against the stone and went to stand, but his large hand rested against your thigh stopping you.

“I’m sorry, i'll stop.” He dropped his own cigarette before rubbing his hands on his face and resuming the slightly more uncomfortable silence. You stood, gripping the metal bars for balance and rested as you stood.

You sighed heavily also, crossing your arms and resting you chin so you could just see him out of the corner of his eye. “I’ve known you since I was a child, Sirius. And ive known Reg just as long. I can’t,” you stopped to consider how you’d phrase your next statement, “I can’t apologise for something I never did. I’d say sorry if I had a reason to but I dont. It’s none of my business, but he is really struggling. He needs his friends, he needs a real fami-“

“Your right, Y/N. It isn’t any of you business,” He stood now too, towering over you. He seemed almost intimidating in this light, the black of his clothes completely dulling his figure, “he is my brother. Its nothing to do with you.”

“Well you certainly don’t act like it, do you? He’s my family too, your my family Sirius. God knows we’ve been more like family than the real thing. But no, it’s fine, I can see where i’m not wanted.”

Sirius sighed, reaching for the cigarettes that you quickly batted from his hand, “No its not tha-“

“Yes it is, we gave it a go, but it didn’t work. Everyone told us we’d be great but they were wrong, we were miserable then and we are miserable now. We ruined a perfectly good thing and that’s what hurts the most.” Letting out an exasperated sigh, you noticed the sky finally lit part of Sirius’ face, the light casting a glare over his eyes and cheek. You held your hand up and rested lightly on his face. He sunk into your hand like an animal being pet, and your thumb ran gently over his almost translucent skin. The air was still as you both didn’t dare to let out even single breath.

You pulled it back quickly, linking them both in front of you.

“Can we at least be friends?” The air stilled again as he considered the answer, and if the light wasn’t on his face you were sure you’d have missed the nod of his head. He didn’t offer anything more, didn’t even look at your face.

“Thanks for the cigarette.”

*****

It don't matter Everyone wants an explanation And I don't know what to say anymore

*****

A/N: The song from this fic is Same Room by JP Saxe. Hope you enjoyed, ill update the next part soon.

#sirius black x reader #marauders era x reader #sirius black imagine #sirius black x y/n #bill Skarsgard #marauders series #remus lupin #James Potter #Peter pettigrew #lily evans #Marlene mckinnon #Mary mcdonald

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storysofmyown · 4 years

Text

Single Father Lucifer Au, Mammons birthday edition!

This one is going to be a little different from the rest for i will only be focusing on Mammon and how the family prepares for his birthday and stuff like that, so if anything this is kind of like a bonus or something XD

Lucifer is a busy parent...thank God he has little Satan and little Asmodeus because those two are organization and decorations monsters

A month prior to Mammons birthday Satan and Mammon would come in to Lucifers study where he was reading some papers, Lucifer would just look at them and raise an eyebrow, those two are the least likely to come in and bother him so this most be important.

“Father” Satan would start, as his eyes are fixed on a little notebook he has and a pencil in his ear. “Have you started planning Mammons birthday?” Lucifer would raise an eyebrow at his sons.

“That’s a month away, why would i start preparations now?” At this, Asmodeus would let out an exaggerated gasps, both hands covering his mouth as he like at Lucifer, making the tired father known that this wasn’t going to be over soon. “Daaaad! How can you say that?! Dont you know that birthdays take time, money and planning?! Specially one this big! Mammon is turning 13!” Asmodeus jumps up and down happily and excitedly, before Satan puts a finger over his own lips and make a shushing sound while looking at Asmo. “...sorry, i just get excited” Asmodeus smiles sheepishly before running to close the door.

Lucifer sighs, his eyes on both children before he gestures for them to sit in the two big chairs that were in front of his desk, as he sat on the other end, looking at them and playing with his pen. “Okay then, I’ll hear you out.” Lucifer smiles at his children, making Satan take his pencil and start scribbling something down while Asmodeus squealed.

While the three discussed plans, presents, decorations, invitations and all that stuff, Lucifers mind lingered for a couple of seconds. Mammon was turning 13. He still can remember the day he was born and the night they brought him home. Lucifer was a mess, waking every half hour to go check on him and yet...not even once did Mammon woke up to cry that night at all, he probably has a picture of that night saved somewhere.

And so, the preparations began. After work Lucifer would buy some of the stuff they may need little by little (Asmodeus idea) and keep them hidden in his room.

When there was only a week left, Asmodeus faked an illness that day so he could stay at home and he and Lucifer could buy the rest of the stuff and the invitations.

Once Satan got from school, he helped write some and put them all in neat little envelopes, giving Lucifer some to give at work to Solomon, Barbatos, Simeon, and Diavolo, while he and Asmodeus distributed the others to some school friends.

Somehow they were able to keep everything from Mammon up until the day, but they needed a way for him to not see them putting all the decorations up, so Lucifer decided to take Mammon on a birthday trip just the two of them.

Lucifer woke Mammon up super early, making the child groan and cover his head with his sheet. “Its Sunday, why are you waking me up so early?” Mammon groans out, head peeking out from the covers as he watches Lucifer stand with a smile, dressed up to go out. “...you have work today?” Mammon asks, a hint of sadness in his voice.

“Not at all.” Lucifer smiles, sitting besides Mammon. “I thought than we could have a little trip. Just the two of us, to celebrate your birthday” At this, Mammon would sit up, eyes lighting up as a smile can be seen in his lips. “Plus...i figured it would be better to let you choose your birthday present”. And that does it, Mammon is out of bed and heading to the bathroom running like the trouble maker he is.

After a couple minutes of waiting, Simeon arrived to watch over the rest of the kids as he took Mammon out, and before any of the others had woken up Mammon and Lucifer were on their way to the mall. Where Mammon spent half of the day walking around and making Lucifer buy him things to eat and the like, at some point Mammon even made Lucifer buy him some dart guns.

As the time to go back home closed in, Lucifer was walking besides Mammon and the both eating ice cream. “Where to next?” Mammon asks chipperly looking up at Lucifer with ice cream in his cheek. At this Lucifer would chuckle,taking a napkin and bending a little to clean his face. “Oi! What are you doing? I aint a kid anymore! I’m thirteen now, so don’t treat me as a kid, I’m basically an adult!” Mammon pouts, moving away from Lucifer’s touch, leaving Lucifer dumbfounded for a moment before smirking.

“Is that the case?” Lucifer raises an eyebrow, waiting from a confirmation from Mammon who only nods, pout still in his lips. “Well, in that case, when will you be helping me pay for the groceries and the bills?” Lucifer watches as Mammons expression changes. “You are an adult now, right? Well, then as an adult you will have responsibilities” Lucifer would straighten up before walking up front, fumbling with his keys only to hear Mammon behind him.

“W-wait! Y-you aren’t serious, right? Dad! Tell me you are joking!” This would get a chuckle out of Lucifer as Mammon catched up to him.

On their ride back home, it was peaceful, and the sugar had gone down a little making Mammon fall asleep in the passengers sit. (Lucifer may or may not have taken a couple of pictures, shh)

After they get home, Mammons expression would be priceless the moment the door swings open and he sees the decorations and everyone jumps screaming happy birthday It was the face of pure glee as he laughed.

At one point during the party, Mammon sneaked behind Lucifer and managed to land a dart in the middle of Lucifer’s forehead. Lucifer looked in time to see Leviathan take a picture and hand Mammon 5 bucks as Mammon laughed proudly before the two started running as Lucifer tried to get them.

A lot of sugar and running around later, almost everyone one gone and his six children asleep, Lucifer sighed, asking for Diavolo to help him carry some of them to their rooms.

Lucifer carried a sleeping Mammon to his room, leaving the child in his bed as Lucifer looked at him, a sigh escaping his lips.

The memory of what Mammon had said coming back, and so do the memories of Mammon as a new born baby, the happiness Lucifer felt as he held his child for the first time, the memories of Mammon walking for the first time, his first words, Mammons small expression of glee as he played with his younger siblings and prided himself in being their older brother...well, it may have brought some tears to Lucifer’s eyes.

“Basically an adult, huh?” Lucifer says, slowly as he caresses Mammons white hair. “You are still my child, little one...happy birthday Mammon, i love you” With this, Lucifer would give Mammon a kiss on his forehead and put the sheets over his body, closing the door and taking a deep breath.

“Everything okay?” Diavolo asks Lucifer, getting close to them man and embracing him, Lucifer burring his head on Diavolo’s shoulder and letting out a small chuckle as he hugs Diavolo back, pulling away for a second to kiss the older man.

“...yeah...everything its okay...” Lucifer would smile once Diavolo embraces him again, because no matter how he felt about his son growing up, he was just glad he was there to see it.

Aighty! Here this is! i was planning for my next Single Father Lucifer AU to be a explanation of the timeline and stuff but Mammons birthday gets priority! So...i wrote this for him, i hope y’all like it and happy birthday Mammon!!

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seijch · 3 years

Text

ANNOUNCEMENT: NOT A HELLO, BUT NOT A GOODBYE EITHER

omg hi ... im like . ashamed to come back after saying brief hiatus in october and then disappearing off the face of the earth til FEBRUARY but under the cut i will be explaining myself and the following, if youre interested (and a tl;dr at the very bottom if you don’t wanna scroll thru this obnoxiously long post):

the reason(s) i was gone for so long

what i was doing during that time (its just a personal account yall can scroll past this idrc)

the status of those um . halloween requests

the future of this account

i. so . Hiatus .

i know. i know . i probably mentioned it when i made the announcement post, but my mental health likes to go on one of those rides. yknow the ones where you go like up rlly fast then down maybe and then up then DOWN .... its like that. i needed a break and every time i wanted to come back or thought about it, something would happen and i would get stuck in my own head.

a big reason for getting stuck in my head was (and i hate to admit this ... i hate to admit that i have Insecurities On The Internet) my feelings of inadequacy regarding my writing. i love to plot fics, i love concepts and characters and making little headcanons but i dont ... know if i love writing rn. and i thought for the longest time that like . whatever ill just push thru it its fine ill be fine but it kinda wasnt lmao you can kinda see it in my halloween reqs and what become of them when i get to that but i began to feel like nothing i had put out or would put out would hold up prose wise (and normally i dont feel like this im much more “idc its my life im living it” but thats not a rant for tumblr LMAO). i still feel like that -- like im better as a reader than a writer. but . You Know :-)

tl;dr: mental state go brrrrr

ii. anywhere here’s wonderwall

when i left, i was in a steadily decreasing mental and emotional state, made worse by a situation at work that really was a case of petty jealousy on my end and rlly isnt very consequential now despite how much pain and resentment it gave me when it Was a problem so i wont get into it. the tl;dr of november and december was me using work as an crutch and distraction -- i know my job, i do it well, it helped me not think about my responsibilities and obligations and inadequacies. of course, as the holiday season grew busier n busier i was scheduled so often that i moved 88 or so miles (according to my apple watch, which i ONLY wear at work since im never anywhere else outside my house) and fell into a cycle of showering n sleeping at my house before going back the next day. (theres definitely something to be said abt capitalism and “grind culture” here but once again its not the time or place snsjkdfds)

at the turn of the new year, i happened to remember a birthday card i hadnt filed away for safekeeping from a friend of mine that id been horribly out of touch with til that point. i started crying because i realized how out of touch id been in general up until that point. the month of january was great for me: i was focused, happy, and in a much better place than i had been before. the end of it brought me down focus wise and im hoping that enough time away from my distractions will refocus me bc i ... need it LMAO and though ive burned out from that level of productivity and gotten distracted again im ... trying to stay positive which i think is the most i can do 😁👍🏼

media wise, i got real into stardew valley (but burned out bc i played it extensively as a way to wind down after work), the pokemon platinum romhack renegade platinum (still havent finished it bc of school n i played it w the intent to see if i could nuzlocke it ... bitch its so hard but its so fun bc of it), briefly assassins creed: odyssey (im one of those ppl who completes an entire region before i move to the next so you can tell i burned out of that one + wouldnt have the time to properly devote to it even if i didnt), got back into genshin impact after pulling for xiao (after not touching it for like . months), and danganronpa. yes . danganronpa 😐 i Know. i stopped playing it after the second trial of the first game bc i was so hurt by the outcome and picked it up in late january only to get sucked in (thank god i had the foresight to buy the second and third games during the steam winter sale). rn im at the start of chapter 4 if anyone wants to come in my asks and um . talk to me abt danganronpa

tl;dr: I’m Into Danganronpa Now

iii. you realize halloween was three months ago right

i mentioned this in the first section, but i love to plot things. every request is plotted or at least has a solid foundation. i had fun detailing what concept i wanted to go with considering what i was given, and there were some bangers i might touch up in the future. but heres whats going to happen to the requests themselves:

there are two finished requests. one will be posted tomorrow and the other will be touched up (just bc i finished it doesnt mean its good 🧍‍♂️) and scheduled for next saturday. as for the ones i never got around to ...

i will not be finishing those requests. i hate to be That Person, but i feel like we all expected this 🧍‍♂️ what i will do is post all of my notes for each request in batches -- requests that have an @ to go with them will be mentioned in the post proper, but anon asks will be pictured. (there are some asks that came from blogs who are now deactivated but i wrote down all the prompts and remember most of those askers so ill cross that bridge when i get there) there will most likely be an excerpt or two simply bc i think i mightve written a few plot points or interactions in the form of bullet points. i rlly am sorry about doing this but i remember looking at my notion doc with all the prompts and feeling ... like i wasnt measuring up n it wasnt just to myself or to some intangible concept of “other” id constructed but it was instead to those who requested n actually WANTED to see and hear and read my writing and i ...... im gonna admit thats another big reason i avoided this site.

regardless, youll definitely get what i have (and likely more than just my bullet points and illegible handwriting).

tl;dr: im sorry. what i have in terms of plot, concept, and interaction for every request will be posted, but i cant say ill ever complete them and mean it.

iv. so what now?

well i mean . im not entirely sure how sold i am on haikyuu in the content creation department (as a creator n to a lesser extent, as a consumer). as mentioned previously, its no longer my primary focus. it doesnt mean im not into haikyuu anymore; i have a lot of love for those boys but i cant rlly say im even caught up w recent fandom activity and also havent even finished s4 pt2 LMAO thats on my to do list

and despite all that, i still want to share my plots n concepts and snippets and maybe even fics. it wont happen anytime soon. it might not even happen. but i mean . its better than me saying i wont write ever again shjdkfs but either way ill probably use this blog as a personal blog w the occasional ask game for dialogue prompts (those are always so fun i love making up aus to fit like . the most mundane prompts)

as for my works (past and any potential future), ive opened an ao3 acc here n ill be editing n possibly expanding on my old works to post there. tumblr, to me, is The x reader hub, but i figure more x reader fics on ao3 is never a bad thing.

ill be deleting/posting drafted posts to the queue since they were all meant to be queued anyway as well as (sorry again 🧍‍♂️) deleting or answering asks in the inbox. (moots if you get a notif from me saying i rbed your post from months ago ... mind your business) im very hard to get ahold of and its ... a problem. expect an overhaul of the nav n shit to reflect my new direction n also because i feel like i cant tell if my passion for carrd is shared by the majority HSDKLFS maybe its better to read my info in a normal post ykwim .......

and of course . if youve read all this n decided im no longer worth the follow, i sure as hell cant stop you. thank you for wanting to, at some point, hear what i have to say -- it means more than you think.

tl;dr: writing will be edited and reposted to ao3, this blog will be a personal blog with a hint of writing (sometimes)

the tl;dr to end all tl;drs:

im back! i wont be as active as i used to due to a lessened interest in haikyuu in general, but i have an ao3 acc now where all my past work will be edited, possibly expanded, and reposted. any future work will also find itself there. my halloween requests will be posted in batches as incomplete concepts, plots, and snippets of scenes; i wont be promising to finish any of them.

there are still fic concepts im attached to and want to finish, but i cant promise any more writing on my end. this blog will be a personal blog with maybe writing, not a writing blog with my personal thoughts all over it.

regardless if you stick around or not, its been crazy sexy cool (equal emphasis) being on haikyuu tumblr even tho i wasnt around for long ... even tho its not my main focus anymore, im still excited to see what the future might hold 🤝

love, ari 💌

#did i have an announcement tag #announcement #also regarding work hsjkdfsd the company i work for didnt give my location the opening for the full time position i wanted #my managers all agree id be promoted if we had it but we dont so i . hee .#anyway um i hope everyones doing well #some of my moots changed urls while i was away and now i have no idea who anyone is #its like when you see your familys friends and theyre like omg youre so big now! i remember when you were a baby and youre like 🧍‍♂️#and you have to play along bc apparently they remember you hskdfsd #im not very funny in this post but i figured id rather be honest considering my lengthy absence #consider this my comeback stage

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