#i keep trying and hoping and whatnot but after a certain point it’s like nobody likes me like that bc there is Something Fundamentally Wrong

[xoshepard]

pretending every day to be mentally stable but also isolating myself more and more until i am just sitting on my bed crying dhkdhdkdhdkd help

#idk how to say to my friends ‘i’m ashamed that i’ve never dated anyone and i feel unlovable and humiliated all the time recently’ #i keep trying and hoping and whatnot but after a certain point it’s like nobody likes me like that bc there is Something Fundamentally Wrong #With Me As A Human #tirah talks #if i had a delete later tag this would be in it chkshd but i’ll probably just forget

[littlesniggy]

Princess Part Three

Anon: Hello! I think it’s about time I request princess part 3 🧎‍♀️. I would love to read more if u have any more ideas floating around. (If u can’t think of anything to add disregard this. I love u tho 😉)

Thank you for your request, Anon! I hope it was okay for me to write a third part since it was @pure-kirarin requests originally. I hope you like it!

Warning: 18+, nsfw, degradation, name calling

Pairing: Kid x female reader

Word count: 3.8k

Part One Part Two

It was mere coincidence that she met him again but the moment she saw his ship from afar her heart started racing like crazy in her chest. Why was he here? Memories from two years ago rushed back to her mind, every dirty thing he did with her, every word of praise he uttered to her – everything was instantly present.

“Everything alright, dear?” her husband asked, studying here flushed face with a slightly concerned expression. “Do you have a fever?” she laughed awkwardly and shook her head. “No, everything’s fine. Don’t worry.” She uttered, trying to get her heartbeat under control. The ship disappeared behind a hill, probably rounding the island in search for a good anchoring spot. Nobody else seemed to have noticed the pirate ship which had her filled with slight relief, internally not wanting to them to get caught.

“Are you ready for the meeting, dear?” he asked, holding out his arm for her to take. She smiled back at him, looking confident on the outside but totally distraught on the inside. Would the event from back then repeat itself? Would they come to the castle, her new home and raid it like they did two years ago? Would they kill innocent people? Questions over questions flooded her mind but she had to remind herself to stay focused. She was a queen by now, her husband’s parents passed away last summer on sea on their way to a foreign kingdom. Pirates, most likely.

They walked through long corridors, passing countless doors until they stopped in front of a huge wooden double door. “Let’s hope everything goes smoothly.” He whispered, kissing her cheek before letting go of her arm. The doors opened and he walked in, her following a little behind.

The people in the room stood up, bowing down a little. Her husband nodded as a sign of greeting, she dropped a curtsey and took a seat by his side, hands folded on her lap. He was the one talking. Not because he thought it wasn’t a woman’s job but because he simply knew politics better than her. She attended every meeting, learning each time something new. He wanted her to ‘know the business’ as he liked to call it as well as him. She didn’t complain.

The meeting dragged on forever and she caught herself drifting away with her thoughts countless times, thinking about a certain pirate. It took all her willpower not to start rubbing her thighs together every time she had to think about sucking his dick, him taking her on her huge bed and making her moan in complete bliss.

When it was finally over, hands were shaken, smiles on everyone’s faces. The deal with the other kingdom was a complete success and she was proud of her husband’s negotiation skills. “You did great.” She whispered once everyone was out of ear shot and he smiled at her, giving him a short kiss on the lips. “Everything thanks to you. You’re my good luck charm.” He said, making her blush a little.

The dinner afterwards was a little more pleasant than the meeting, not as tense and a lot of alcohol was emptied by the men. She held small talk with everyone, knowing how to converse with people and how to keep it interesting and not let awkward pauses take over a conversation.

Later that night, when the two were in bed together, her husband already asleep, she was wide awake. She hadn’t heard anything about pirates landing on their island and she felt relief. On the other hand was she a little worried. Concerns about an ambush, looting and whatnot made her mind go crazy. She knew what Kid was capable of and that most encounters with the Kid pirates ended in a bloodbath. So, she made a decision.

Quietly, as not to wake her husband, she got out of bed and hurried into the dressing room, putting on some pants and a hoodie, not making the same mistake as last time and just leaving in her night gown. She exited the room and walked towards the entrance of the castle. The guards looked at her confused when they saw her.

“I’m just going for a walk.” She informed them. “Would your majesty want someone to accompany her?” one of them asked but she declined. She didn’t want anyone knowing where she was headed. “I’ll be back soon.”

When she was outside, the cold air hit her right in the face and she wrapped her arms around herself. Why didn’t she think of taking a jacket with her? Now it was too late and she better hurried to where she suspected their ship anchored.

It took her longer than expected to get to the spot where she imagined them to be. It was secluded, no citizens around and out of side from anyone. Her guts proved to be right when she saw the huge ship and loud laughter from afar. Her heart skipped a beat when she got closer and saw the silhouette of Eustass Kid, sitting by the fire place, surrounded by his crew.

But the closer she got the more doubt filled her body. What, if he didn’t recognize her? What, if killed her? And why did she come here in the fist place? Scenes from back then came back. It was all so familiar, her approaching the crew, not knowing what to expect, not knowing why she left the castle.

Before she knew she was standing there, in plain sight for everyone to see. Heat was the first one to notice her. He raised a hand and pointed at her. The crew fell silent and Kid slowly turned around. She couldn’t see his face, the light of the fire coming from behind him only illuminating his silhouette but she could see his confused eyes. “Who’s there?” he demanded to know. Taking one step after the other she slowly stepped into the light, her hands clutching at her hoodie. Her heart was racing, her mind telling her how stupid she was for mindlessly approaching them. But it was too late now.

“Who’re you?” Kid asked. She could now make out his irritated expression, no recognition on his part to who she was. Her heart sunk at the realization and she made a step back, her body demanding her to run away but she just couldn’t move. “I asked you a question!” Kid got up from his seat, stomping over to her, a hand on his gun, the other one – his metal arm – pointing at her. When did this happen? What did he do to lose his arm?

“You deaf? Answer me, woman.” He stopped right in front of her, his crew not far behind him. She had a lump in her throat, needing a few attempts to finally being able to speak up. “I-I’m…” his intense stare was boring right into her soul and she had to start over again. “I’m Y/n.” she whispered intimidated, her whole body shaking. How was it that he was even more intimidating than two years ago? Last time, she was scared, yes, but this time she was mortified being so close to him, especially since he didn’t remember who she was. For him, she was an intruder, probably with bad intentions. How could she be so foolish?

Kid looked her up and down, a scowl on his face. “Why are you here?” he asked. “I….I wanted to…see you.” Kid had to concentrate to hear her, barking at his crew to ‘shit the fuck up’ when they laughed at her pathetic form. Killer showed up right next to his captain. She felt his eyes look her up and down before he looked at Kid.

“I think I know her. She was the princess from that country we raided.” Kid looked at him confused, obviously not knowing which of the many countries he was talking about. But then it clicked and a huge grin replaced the scowl. He turned his head back to her, realization reflecting in his eyes.

“Oh, it’s the little princess, right?” he let go of his gun and took her chin between his index finger and thumb, eying her face curiously. “How comes you’re here? Have you missed me that much?” her cheeks flushed bright red and she averted her gaze, unable to answer his question.

“Why are you so shy, all of a sudden? If I remember correctly you were pretty damn loud the last time I saw you, Princess.” He chuckled; his thumb swept across her bottom lip. The men around them laughed, one of them whistled.

“Do you live on this island now? It’s a pretty island. Probably a lot of wealthy people here.” He withdrew his hand, leaving her longing for more of his touch.

The realization of his words hit her shortly after and she looked at him in shock. “What? No! Please, don’t do this again!” as good as he had made her feel back then, the trauma of your country, your home being invaded, your people being killed still haunted her dreams. Those were the nights she wished to forget but knew she never could.

Kid started laughing at her reaction, stepping a step back, his hand on his hip. “Why not? Who will stop us? You, Princess?” he teased, leaning down to her, a mad glint in his eyes. “Please….I’m…I’m begging you! Leave this country alone.” Tears started forming in her eyes. Now she knew why she came here. She wanted to confirm what she already knew. She came here to hear him say that they would repeat what they had done two years ago and she needed to stop him!

The captain chuckled amused, straightening his back again and crossing his arms in front of his chest. “Usually, people go in their knees when they beg someone.” His voice was cutting through her like a knife. “C’mon, princess. I think I’ve taught you before how to kneel in front of someone, haven’t I?” knowing laughter echoed through the cold air. Embarrassment was written all over her face at the mention of how she knelt in front of him, everyone around them knowing exactly what their captain was talking about.

Hesitantly, she got down on her knees and bowed her head down to the cold ground, her forehead touching the dirt. “Please…..” she whispered, tears running down her cheeks. “Please what?” Kid insisted, making her repeat herself. “Please, leave my country alone.” “Your country?” He asked, smirking at her kneeling form. “Oh right, you were about to get married! How’s the life as a wife? Making your man as happy as you made me?” he crouched down in front of her, his warm hand patting her head before grabbing her hair and pulling it up, making her yelp in pain in the process.

“Did you learn any new tricks while I was gone?” his voice was low and heavy with suggestion, making her stomach twist at his words. She stayed silent, not wanting to answer this humiliating question. “I bet you did…mind if you show me?” Her eyes were staring back at his but out of the corners she saw the outlines of his dick pressing against his pants. She swallowed thickly, already made up her mind.

She didn’t need to answer to his question. He let go of her hair and got up, not bothering to help her up as well and just walking away, expecting her to follow. “I’ll be back soon!” he informed his crew with a cocky smirk, disappearing into the darkness. She had to hurry as to not lose him, the laughter of his crew following her with every step.

She followed his huge form through the small forest until they stood right in front of his ship. It was huge up close and her mouth was agape in awe. She had never seen a pirate ship up close but it was so exciting. Kid was already on the bridge, waiting for her to follow him. Quickly, she boarded the ship after him, looking around curiously. She kind of felt like a puppy following its master the way she was following him but she couldn’t help it. She was simply drawn to him. No matter how scared she was of him, how moody he could be, the excited feeling took over almost always, throwing all concerns over board.

“Pretty cool, huh? You said you wanted to become a pirate. I guess this is the closest you’ll ever get to become one.” He teased, knowing she would never leave her country. She just wasn’t cut to be a pirate. “Come.” He said, opening a door leading to as small hallway before he opened another door, giving way to his personal quarters.

She stepped inside and he closed the door behind her, not locking it this time. And why should he? She came here on her own accord, he wasn’t forcing her to follow him like last time. His dick was still hard but not as painful as before after having some time cooling down a little on the way here. But the moment he laid his eyes on her the blood rushed right back into his nether region.

She was standing in front of his bed, her front facing him and her hands had already removed the hoodie, leaving her in a thin, almost see-through top, her nipples visible under the fabric. “Fuck, princess.” He purred, taking two steps to stand right in front of her, admiring the perky little nubs.

“Not as shy as I remember but I like it!” he praised, his hand moving under her top, up her stomach to her breasts, fondling one roughly. She moaned, closing her eyes at his touch. Her hands moved over his muscular chest, scratching her nails over his skin. His grin widened and he removed the top, exposing her naked upper body. He licked his lips at the sight, leaning down to bite at the sensitive flesh with his teeth. Another moan filled the room and she opened the two belts he was wearing before opening his pants, letting them glide to the floor.

“Someone’s eager. I like it.” He purred, opening her pants as well and almost ripping them off her body, her panties following right after. “Kid…!” she panted, getting rid of the rest of his clothes until they both were completely naked. He pushed her onto the bed, taking a quick look at her open legs before she closed them and kneeled in front of him on his bed, eye-level with his dick.

Kid swept her hair out of her face, resting his hand on the back of her head. “Such a nice view. C’mon, princess. Show me how you blow your little king.” He purred, making her blush deeply. But she didn’t protest. Instead, she took his heavy dick into her hand, stroking it a couple of times before kissing the flushed tip. She tasted the first dops of his pre-cum, licking it up with her tongue. Kid watched her in amazement. She had changed so much. She was almost like a professional but with better hygiene and more wealth to her name.

“What a good, slutty princess, licking my dick like a lollipop.” At his praise she rubbed her legs together creating some friction. But she didn’t pay it any further mind and instead concentrated on the task at hand.

She closed her soft lips around his head, taking him in more and more. Her hand was stroking the part her mouth couldn’t reach, following the movements of her mouth. Kid groaned at the sight, guiding her head a little with his hand, his hips thrusting lazily against her face.

“Look at me, princess.” She opened her eyes at his demand, looking up at his, a wave of heat instantly rushing down to her core. Kid chuckled and began moving her head a little faster and deeper. Shameless, throaty moans filled the room. Her hand came up and started fondling his balls, squeezing them lightly while he face fucked her, his mushroom head bumping against the back if her throat. A few choked noises left her body but nothing too major. Saliva ran down her chin and just the sight of that could’ve made him cum at once but he held himself back. It would’ve been a waste to cum already, no matter how fucking lewd and sexy she was looking right now.

“You’ve trained quite a lot. Do you only suck your king’s dick or do you go around practice with the guards as well? Either way, he should be proud of his little whore.” Even if she could have she probably wouldn’t have retorted anything simply she didn’t know what. But his words had her pussy clench around nothing. Something about him calling her a whore had her whole body tingle in excitement.

“Good princess.” He praised, his eyes not leaving hers. He just glanced up once, seeing her hips wiggle, showing him how horny she was. “You want me fuck you, princess?” he asked when he looked back at her face. A small, muffled moan was his answer and he pushed her off his dick.

“Get in all four, princess.” He demanded but she hesitated. Irritated, he raised an eyebrow at her. “I said get in all four!” he repeated himself. The princess bit her lip, looking up at him shyly. “Can…can I ride you?” she asked with a weak voice. Kid was surprised to hear her make this request. Usually, the women just followed his orders. This was new. And he liked it. With a huge grin he let himself fall on his bed with his back, crossing his arms behinf his head. “Take a seat.” He invited her, watching her climb over his body, back turned to him. He looked her back up and down, grin even wider when he saw her ass. “What a nice view…”

She took his dick into her hand, the other one braced herself on his thick thigh for support. She raised her body, her core hovering over his dick and she slowly let herself sink on him. It hurt; of course it did. Neither she not he prepared her sex for his dick but over the last couple of years she found out that this made her even hotter. She liked the pain in the beginning, even though it was almost a little bit too painful.

Kid groaned when he felt her heat around him, instinctively thrusting upwards to meet her halfway. She yelped when he filled her out, clenching around him at the feeling. He was bigger than her husband. She could feel his prominent vein that was running over his shaft. She let her head hang low for a moment, letting her pussy adjust to his size before she started moving.

He watched as his dick slowly glided out of her core before she let herself fall back onto hi with a loud moan. “Fuck.” He hissed, closing his eyes at the feeling. His hand came back from under his head, grabbing the juncture between hip and thigh, digging his nails into her skin. “Move those fucking hips, princess.” He groaned. She let him sink in and glide out with each move, watching the show like Kid and feeling her stomach tingle.

It was so much different form her husband, so much more exciting that she picked up her pace soon, wanting to feel him deeper and deeper inside of her. Kid’s hand moved up, grabbing her tit in his big hand, fondling it roughly, playing with the sensitive tissues. She leaned back on him, her hands now bracing herself on his muscular chest for support, moving her hips up and down while the pirate thrusted his hips upwards in tandem.

Soon, Kid’s metal arm wrapped around her waist and he pulled her back onto his chest, securing her body with said arm and thrusting up into her at an almost abnormal speed, making her see stars. His other hand glided between her legs, finding the swollen nub and circling it almost forcefully. She screamed in pleasure, pressing her back against his torso, feeling his hard muscles work under her and his ragged breathing tickling her skin.

“Kid….Kid I can’t hold it in any longer…!” she moaned, feeling the familiar feeling coil inside her stomach. Kid’s grip tightened and she could feel his grin behind her. “Already?” he taunted her, picking up his speed again, making her form incoherent sentences. “Guess it can’t be helped, princess.” He pressed his thumb down hard on her clit making her scream in bliss. She arched her body as she came with his name on her lips around his cock, tightening around him oh so good.

Kid didn’t stop, his grip got even tighter as he fucked into her sensitive cunt, seeking his own relief. Her whole body was trembling due to overstimulation, her pussy sore and begging for him to stop but soon enough it was replaced by pleasure once more.

“Fuck…princess! You enjoy this way too much!” he laughed to her moans. With a swift move he turned around with her, his weight pressing her into the mattress. He started fucking her from behind, reaching even deeper parts of her body. He grabbed her hair with his hand, making her turn her head to give him access to her neck. His lips started sucking on the think skin, ready to leave dark marks. “N-no! My husband!” she moaned but it was too late.

“You have time to think about your husband at a time like this? I think I need to fuck you even harder, princess.” He purred into her ear, before getting up, grabbing her hips in his hands and slamming his hips against her ass, filling her out in all the right ways. “Shit…Kid! Just like that!” she moaned, moving against his hard thrusts. Kid moaned as well, throwing his head back and enjoying the feeling.

It didn’t take long for her to reach her second orgasm, screaming his name and clenching so hard around him, forcing him to cum as well. He was smart enough to withdraw the last second, coating her back instead with his sticky semen. With a grin he stroked every last bit of his cum out, smearing it over her body.

She was lying there, panting heavily, with heavy eyes, ready to fall asleep.

“Don’t you dare fall asleep here. You go right back to your husband. Maybe you can show him what a mess a real man can make.” He purred, already climbing off his bed to go to the bathroom. “Get dressed and fuck off, princess. I don’t need your king becoming suspicious cause you’re gone for so long. We’re gonna leave tomorrow so no worries.” He came back, leaning against the door frame. “We weren’t planning on raiding your cute little country in the first place. But your begging was really good. Hope to see it again someday.”

#one piece #op #eustass kid #eustass kid x reader #eustasscaptainkid #captain kid #kid x reader #op kid #op x reader #op imagine #one piece x reader #female reader #ns.fw #sm.ut #x reader #request

[cursedwriter]

You’re Everything and More - One Shot

Request: Anon: Hey, I saw that you’re looking for insp sooo I have the idea that the reader wakes up from a nightmare and Rob comforts her and there’s a lot of fluff thank you! 

Author’s note: Requests are open! Send anything you want! For the moment I’ll stick to one shots, otherwise I’ll lose control and I’m still in the middle of the Semester sooo that wouldn’t be great. Also I haven’t written in a while so this might suck alsooo can we please appreciate the gif like hot damn what I wouldn’t give

Word Count: 1.3k

“Shh, everything’s alright,” someone murmured next to you. “I’m here. It was just a dream.”

You sat up straight, momentarily confused about your surroundings, but the confusion vanished as soon as you felt his warm hand rub soothingly up and down your back. The room was dark, so you couldn’t see him, but you felt him shift behind you and suddenly his soft lips pressed feathery kisses along your shoulder. Gently his other hand searched for your face, cupping it and wiping his thumb across your cheek. Until this point you hadn’t even noticed that you were crying.

“I’m sorry,” you croaked out, voice sounding off to your own ears. “I’m sorry I woke you.” 

His hand fell from your face and you instantly missed his warm touch. “Don’t be silly,” he reassured you. You felt him laying down again, his hand reaching out to you once more, but this time to pull you down gently. You nestled yourself against his side, inhaling his scent and letting his comforting backrubs soothe you further. Soon your whimpers stopped and so did the tears. “Do you want to talk about it?” He asked after a short moment of silence.

You didn’t answer at first, not really sure what to say. It wasn’t because you were ashamed, you knew that you could tell him anything … but saying it aloud would bring the memories back and it hurt you just to think about it. He didn’t press, though, maybe thinking that you had fallen asleep again. “I don’t remember all of it,” you broke the silence. The dream was already hazy in your mind, seeping through your hands like sand. You could barely hold on to the exact images, but that wasn’t necessary anyway. The feeling of it lingered, burned inside your bones, your heart, leaving a scorching sensation behind, a bitter aftertaste. “You … You left me,” you were barely able to choke the words out, the hollow feeling still very much prominent in the pit of your stomach.

In response to your words, his grip around you tightened and he brought you closer to his body. You rested your head on his chest, listening to his even breathing and the steady beating of his heart. “You know I’d never do that,” he whispered against your hair, pressing a light kiss on it after he was done.

“Please, don’t make promises that you can’t keep.” Your voice was also barely above a whisper and after he didn’t answer, you were almost certain that he hadn’t heard you.

“I’m not,” he said eventually. “I mean … how could I ever leave you when you’re the best thing that has ever happened to me? When you’re literally everything I always hoped for and so much more? How could I?”

It was quiet again while you processed his words. You knew that he loved you, he told you that over and over again every day, but somehow you still couldn’t believe it sometimes. It wasn’t easy navigating your normal life through the craziness that was his life. In the beginning you found it kind of amusing that people were trying to get pictures of you, like … why would anyone want that? It was so absurd to you that you took it as a joke at first. Now, though, everything looked a lot different. Just because you were dating someone in the spotlight made everyone believe it was okay to spread false rumors about you, have an opinion on you as a person without having ever spoken to you personally and of course everyone knew what was best for Rob but Rob himself apparently… and the best thing almost always didn’t include you. You were bashed online for not ‘being good enough’ for ‘just wanting his money and fame’ and whatnot. Rob was better at ignoring snide comments. He was used to people having their opinions on him and he didn’t care much for it. You, on the other hand, had never had to deal with anything remotely close to this before. This stood in no correlation to your middle school self being bullied by some popular girl that liked to pick on you because you had had a weird obsession with Star Wars at the time and that was only ‘for boys’. And though, obviously that had hurt you at the time - because how could somebody hate you for something that you loved? – this now was a million times worse. You never really considered yourself to be super insecure – the normal amount of insecure, sure, nobody’s perfect and whatnot – but after that one afternoon where you went down an online spiral and sifted your way through every comment that was directed either directly at you or at your relationship with Rob, things had taken a considerable turn. You had cried for hours, thanking god that Rob wasn’t home to see you like this. He felt bad enough already that he had made your life a lot harder – which was ridiculous because it wasn’t his fault, but he liked to burden himself whenever he found an excuse to do so. It drove you nuts sometimes. However, all those comments had you questioning if someone like him could really ever love someone like you. And most of the time you came to the conclusion that you must be dreaming whenever he reassured you that he did love you.

“I just feel like that one of those days you’ll realize what a mess I am…,” quiet sobs escaped your lips, but you tried your hardest to force the tears back that were already welling up behind your eyes. “One day you might hate everything about me that you find endearing now and then you’ll leave me … and I can’t even be mad, because deep down I knew it all along … You’re too good for me.”

You could feel him tense under your touch, a long sigh left his lungs and the hand that was rubbing you back slowly came up to play with your hair. Something he liked to do when he was anxious.

“I hate that you think so little of yourself… I wish you could see yourself through my eyes just once.” While his right hand played with your hair, his other found your hand that rested on his chest and he intertwined your fingers. He brought your hand up to his lips and kissed every one of your fingers with brief feathery kisses that sent butterflies through your stomach. “Because if you did, you’d see that there is no way in hell that I could ever hate you! Ever!” He laid your hand down again, playing with your fingers now. “I don’t think I’ve ever loved anyone as much as I love you. Sometimes the feeling’s so intense I’m worried my heart will suddenly explode because it can’t contain the amount of love I have for you! Being apart hurts me physically and whenever I’m away for work I count down the days until I can finally hold you in my arms again! I think everyone’s already annoyed by me, because I just can’t shut up talking about you, because you’re literally the only thing that’s ever on my mind. If anything, I’m the one who’s afraid that you might leave me once you’ve had enough.” He paused his monologue, deep in thought and then he added, “I don’t think I could survive that.”

You didn’t really know what to say after that, stunned at his declaration. The only thing you could think of was to show him how much he meant to you. You propped yourself up on his chest, laying on top of him now. There was absolutely no light in the room, so you couldn’t see his face. With your nose you slowly tested your way up, leaving kisses as you went: up his throat, on his jawline and cheeks and his nose until finally your lips found his. The kiss was slow and soft at first, but soon it turned needier, more forceful as if you were afraid that he might disappear under your touch.

Well, it’s safe to say you didn’t get much sleep that night. 

Send requests HERE

#robert pattinson #robert pattinson imagine #robert pattinson fanfiction #robert pattinson x reader #edward cullen #twilight #tenet #twilight reimagined #twilight renaissance

[gingerwritess]

oh my god this sounds so needy but i feel like loki and the reader as parents whenever elliot gets his first kiss would make me мєℓт please i need that in my life

ok i got too excited and wrote them a first kiss before all the predating tension just like always soo here. (ps you and loki do make an appearance at the end, it’s not just all morgan and elliot!)

warnings: kissing? yeah kissing and they’re underage if that bothers you but like. it’s just kissing and they’re both 16 and it’s consensual now nobody make this weird okay

Setting a romantic mood was unintentional, but definitely not unwelcome.

Outdoor hallways by candlelight. Asgard kind of is a romantic mood.

He should’ve known better.

Elliot’s simply escorting Morgan back to her room, nothing more. Simply being a prince and whatnot, gentlemanly and proper.

(Well, that’s a lie—Loki had suggested it. Said it would be a golden opportunity, and that it had worked wonders when he was courting you. Then he zoned out completely, turned a lovely shade of pink, and ran off to go kiss you—he assumes.)

So he’s giving it a try. He hadn’t exactly had to offer to walk her, they’d been so engrossed in a familiar debate about mjolnir and elevators that he only realized what was happening when one of the guards, clearly off-duty, walked by and winked at him.

He’d nearly choked at the implications—and quickly realized that yeah, strolling down at candlelit hallway, completely unsupervised and very close together, might have certain…connotations.

“Inanimate objects must be held to different standards than live beings,” she rambles, hands in front of her moving wildly as she tries to logic it out. “It just doesn’t make sense. I mean, physics.”

“Think beyond physics,” Elliot laughs. “More like magic.”

“Right, right, magic.” A small smile tugs at her lips and she bumps him in the arm. “What about you, are you worthy?”

“…maybe.”

“Oh, come on, Elliot, just tell me.”

Clasping his hands behind his back, Elliot smiles with a hum and strides a little further than her, Morgan breaking into a jog to keep up. “But it’s much more fun to keep you guessing…”

“Fine, be difficult,” she huffs and grabs his arm to slow him down. “Then what about me? Think I’d be worthy?”

Turning to look at her, Elliot’s heart jumps to his throat and he can’t help but stare. Golden in the candlelight, she’s beauty and warmth personified, the heat Elliot needs to survive.

Her bottom lip catches between her teeth with her grin, and Elliot quickly averts his gaze, face heating.

“Yeah. Without a doubt.”

Morgan pumps her fist in the air with a hissed “yes,” and Elliot keeps walking, trying to steady his breathing.

He’s been flustered all night, but now that they’re alone, it’s reached a new level.

Whoever dressed her for the festival should be fired, he decides, keep his eyes trained forwards only. Rose pink suits her too well, and she could be a goddess of spring, embroidered flowers hidden in the drapes of soft fabric flowing behind her as she walks beside him.

Her short brown hair, chopped over her shoulders and tucked behind her ears, has gentle waves in it, curls that have given up their lives to the night’s dances and laughter and festivities.

Morgan is glowing.

Glistening in the golden candlelight and dimpled cheeks tired from smiling for so long, yet she still finds the energy to skip down the corridor, spinning on her heel when she reaches the doorway to the next and eagerly watching Elliot catch up to her.

Blurred around the edges, softened curves and fierce eyes for once gentle, he can’t help but stare when she doesn’t move from the doorway as he passes through it, too.

It’s a small doorway, arched and dimly lit and they’re chest to chest, Morgan gazing up at him with a plot in her sly smile that twists Elliot’s stomach into knots.

“Sorry,” Elliot stutters, tongue darting out to wet his dry lips. He doesn’t miss how Morgan’s eyes flit down to watch.

He should move, but finds himself not wanting to.

“Can I tell you something?” Morgan asks breathlessly, still unable to look away from his mouth.

Elliot just makes a sound, a sorry little croak in the back of his throat that he’ll spend eternity wishing he hadn’t made.

“I miss you,” she smiles, reaching between the two of them to take his hand. “I miss being with you every day.”

His eyebrows knot upwards in the sweetest way. “Me, too,” he whispers, then his eyes go wide. “No, not me, me miss you—I-I miss you—”

She lifts her hand, bringing Elliot’s up with it to press her palm flat to his, and his voice catches in his throat. His fingertips are helplessly dusted with that lovely blue, and a spot of it spreads from his palm to his wrist.

His gaze jumps to their hands. Hers burns, in the best way.

“Sorry,” he manages to whisper, blue fingers itching to be hidden in a fist or a pocket again. “You–you make me nervous.”

“Nervous?” Her smile falls in the slightest, eyes widening in concern.

Elliot shuts his eyes when he nods, cursing himself for admitting to that out loud.

“Out of control,” he quietly clarifies. “Uncertain.”

She chews her bottom lip, searching his face, abysmal eyes digging deep into his until he can barely take another breath.

One of her dimples reappears. It’s a calculated movement.

“You’re doing a terrible job of escorting me, your worshipfulness. We haven’t exactly moved in the last five minutes.”

Elliot’s breath leaves him in one nervous laugh. “Terribly sorry, m’lady,” he teases and offers his arm. “Shall we depart?”

“Straightaway, my lord,” she replies with a grin. Linking her arm through his, the pair set off down the next corridor, gazes fixed only ahead.

This corridor is lined on one side by libraries and lounges, doorways framed by candles that won’t ever burn out, inviting you in for a jaunt through the pages of something ancient. On the other side, however, Asgard’s beauty tempts the viewer to stay in the fresh air.

Open on the one side with stone pillars and a waist-high ledge, Asgard gleams below the palace, bursting with life.

“Oh,” Morgan breathes, and her arm falls slack in the crook of Elliot’s. “This is…”

“Breathtaking.”

She nods, her gaze trained on soaking in as much of this view as possible, knowing that the next visit to the realm is never certain.

Her arm still linked with his, he takes the few steps needed to reach the open ledge, the night breeze kicking up the ends of his curls as she leans out into the open air, breathing deep.

It’s air in his lungs, watching her inhale his home.

Her arm has left his, but he can’t bring himself to mind in exchange for this. Trying not to stare too blatantly, he leans against the stone ledge beside her and breathes deeply for his own reasons.

“How do you come back to Earth,” she murmurs, opening her eyes to the kingdom once again, “after knowing about this?”

With difficulty, he wants to say, he probably should say, but that’s a lie. It’s not that difficult to return.

“With a good reason to keep coming back,” he replies, picking at the palm of one hand. “It’s not that bad.”

She casts him a sideways glance, a tiny smile tugging at the corner of her mouth.

For whatever reason she hopes she knows, he won’t meet her gaze, but the beginnings of a smile are there, too.

“You know, I didn’t get to dance with you, my liege.”

It’s true, he’s been kept busy for almost the entire dinner by a visiting princess and her gaggle of duchesses and advisors from Alfheim, leaving Morgan to fidget alongside her parents as they mingled.

“Sorry.” Elliot finally breaks, and a laugh leaves his throat. “I tried, I swear. Thought it just…might be rude to storm off in the middle of a marriage proposal.”

“You’re joking.”

“Nope.” He laughs at his hands, and a couple unruly curls fall into his eyes. “You’d be surprised, the objectification of royalty here is crazy.”

Morgan’s eyebrow quirks. “Objectification sucks, doesn’t it?”

He gives her a sad smile, resting on his elbows on the ledge beside her. “If you ever catch me objectifying someone, please slap me.”

She grins and nudges him with her hip. “With pleasure.”

A deafening cheer fills the air from a pub down below, giving them a welcome distraction, almost enough to the point of Morgan giving up and suggesting they go to bed for real—that is, until Elliot makes the bold move and locks his little finger with hers, refusing to look at her.

You make me nervous.

She has a hunch that he may be a little… inexperienced in this field. The childish spark they might have had back on earth, holding hands and giggling to each other at the top of their staircase, was just that—a child’s distraction.

An excuse for all the time they spent with each other.

He’d grown up, moved away—far away—and time passed for both of them.

Nervous…damn it.

She’d forced it.

Morgan pulls her hand away, fixing her gaze away from him and tucking her hands under her crossed arms.

“We should get to our rooms,” she says stiffly. Pretending not to notice how Elliot’s face falls, she straightens and steels herself, quelling every hope she had for this little walk back to her room.

“Okay.”

Into his pockets go his hands, all too comfortable hidden from sight, and they begin the walk back to Morgan’s room in silence.

She won’t look at him anymore, and she leaves much more space between the two of them, this time.

They barely make it to the end of the corridor before her resolve cracks and she stops.

“Elliot.”

“Yeah?”

She holds up her hand. “Why did you do that?”

He swallows thickly, heat rushing to his face. “Do, uh, what?”

“You know what. You…you did the finger holding thing again. The last time you did that we ended up holding hands—and we were eleven.”

“I’m so sorry,” he blurts, taking a step away away from her. “I thought–I thought you wanted to, I didn’t—I’m so sorry, I thought I read the moment, maybe what I was supposed to do—”

Her heart twists, falling to the pit of her stomach as she lowers her hand.

“Just what you’re supposed to do?”

He couldn’t look more uncomfortable, refusing to look her in the eye and picking at his palm.

“I have no idea. I’m sorry.”

“No, don’t be.”

The two of them stand there, opposite sides of the corridor, both wishing the other would say something.

Elliot wishes it didn’t have to be him.

“What did you want to happen tonight?”

Her eyes go wide. “No. Nonono, get out.”

“I’m not in your head,” he promises, holding up his hands in surrender. “I’m not, I swear. I’m…I’m trying to do this normally.”

She purses her lips and blinks quickly a few times, glancing above his head to avoid that stare.

“You’re not doing a very good job, frosty.”

He lets out an exasperated groan, rubbing his eyes with the heels of his palms. “You can’t expect me to do what you want if I don’t know,” he points out, “and I can’t know what you want unless you either tell me or let me in.”

It’s her turn to groan, and she clenches her eyes shut and her fists by her side.

“Fine,” she grits out. “I wanted something to happen tonight. Y’know. With us.”

His voice catches in his throat.

“But if I make you nervous, and you’re just doing what you think you’re supposed to do,” she continues, eyes still squeezed shut, “then I don’t want it. You don’t want it. I don’t want to force you into anything, okay?”

His mouth opens, eyes wide, then closes again—and a few more times, because she’s rendered him speechless, and if he moves, he’s sure he’ll faceplant onto the floor.

Morgan lets out a slow breath, cheeks burning in the candlelight. “Okay. Let’s never talk about this again.”

“No,” he croaks, “wait—”

A deep breath does the both of them good, and Elliot tries to steady his voice.

“I thought you might not want anything. Didn’t want to force anything on you, and–and it’s…a different kind of nervous.”

She bites back a flustered laugh. “So…that got us far.”

He can only offer a cracked grin back.

Her turn.

And he waits.

Picking at the palm of one hand, he studies her, deciding then and there that maybe everything he’s felt the past few years made some semblance of sense after all.

“Damn it,” she groans, huffing an annoyed puff at the roof of the corridor. “This would be a lot easier if I could just read your mind.”

“Yeah, well, you too,” he sighs. “Are you going to tell me anything?”

She bites her lip—

“No.”

“Okay.” Elliot tries to smile, pretend like it’s not gnawing at his insides. “Then let’s just go—”

“You can…y’know. Read my mind or whatever you do.”

He freezes, narrowing his eyes at her. “You’re joking, right?”

“No,” she whispers. “Do it.”

“I don’t—are you sure you want me to?

“Yes. Do it.”

He doesn’t do anything—at least, it doesn’t look like he does anything, just staring at Morgan as she squeezes her eyes shut, but his heart starts pounding.

An avalanche of words, emotions, doubts, and fears make him stumble backwards in shock.

“What—”

A couple phrases keep coming to the surface, pulsating a little louder than the rest.

He can’t stop staring, and Morgan cracks an eye open again, already wincing at what his reaction might be.

“You…okay?”

He doesn’t move, lips still parted in shock.

“I’m sorry,” she gushes, unable to hold it back anymore, “see, I told you I didn’t want to force it, I’m-I’m so sorry—”

Elliot swallows thickly and takes a cautious step towards her.

“Here.”

He presses his fingertips to her forehead, closing his eyes and bowing his head to her. 

Crisp and clearly him, his thoughts fill her mind, one echoing above the others.

I wouldn’t complain if you did.

He barely gets to move his hand away before his back slams into a pillar by the ledge—then she’s kissing him.

—

Thud.

Loki glances up from his book, his thumb stilling against your ankle. “What was that?”

You shrug and flip a page. “Maybe another book fell.”

He purses his lips, listening intently for a moment longer. No other sound is heard, and he goes back to his reading. 

He’s barely started to stroke your ankle again when the thud is replaced by furious shuffling, a distinctly human rustle outside the library door, and Loki frowns.

“That wasn’t a book.”

Lifting your legs off his lap with a sigh, you stand and cast a look around the little library. “Guards?”

“No,” he replies, conjuring a dagger, just in case. “Not yet.”

You head for the nearest open window while Loki moves quietly to glance out the doorway, dagger at the ready—and immediately ducks back inside, eyes blown wide.

“What?” You rush to his side. “Was something out there? There’s nothing on the other side—”

“Our…son,” Loki croaks. 

You frown. “What?”

He just points wordlessly out the doorway.

Giving him a strange look, you step to the doorway and peek outside.

Oh.

Yeah. Your son.

Morgan Stark has your son lip-locked against a stone pillar and looks close to swallowing him whole.

“Oh, my god.” Ducking back inside, you clap a hand over your mouth. “What the hell—what do we do??”

“Should…should we do anything?” A grin is starting to work it’s way onto your husband’s face. “I mean, they seem to be enjoying themselves—”

“Loki!”

“What? I mean, clearly—oh, norns, this is going to escalate if they keep at it.”

“Oh, my god—do something,” you hiss, risking another glance outside; nope, shouldn’t have done that, there’s definitely tongue involved. “Loki, I swear to god, do something, if Tony sees, they’ll never come back—”

He furrows his brow with a little pout. “Why do I have to be the bad guy here? You go break them up—oh. Mhm, that’ll be a challenge.”

Morgan’s not exactly being gentle, but Elliot certainly doesn’t seem to mind.

“Do something,” you order again, pushing him to the door. “They’re literally on display for all of Asgard, on this balcony. Anyone could look up.”

Loki just hums, leaning back to stop you from pushing him out the doorway. “Maybe they like that. Must run in the family—”

With a smack on the ass and a hissed warning, you shove him one last time and he stumbles into the corridor.

Neither of the two young lovers even notice him.

He clears his throat—still no break in the violent make-out against the ledge. 

Okay, he’ll try a different approach.

Deep breath.

“EWW, ELLIOT, THAT’S GROSS, STOP, PLEASE, THAT’S DISGUSTING—”

―   ―   ―   ―

~ masterlist link in my bio ~

loki tags: @bluediamond007 @himitoshi @drakesfiance @destiel1597 @dangertoozmanykids101 @archy3001 @jcalpha1 @yzssie @skullvieplu @forthesnakeofdragons @skulliebythesea @wegingerangelica @storiesfrommirkwood @agarwaeneth @adaliamalfoy @laurfangirl424@fitzsimmons-is-forever @ladylokimischief @katelinwrites @tarynkauai @polaristrange @loavesofmeat @canadian-ravenpuff-multishipper @lou-makes-me-strong @holyn0vak @chocolatealmondmillk @swtnrholland @kenzieam @jessiejunebug  @the-republic-and-face-of-texas

~ scroll here! ~

@doralupin01 @whitewitchdown @atomiccharmer @falconfeather23435 @babygirlicecream @avengrcs @vethrvolnir2 @bookgirlunicorn @wabisabigrl @myhealingstar @khaleesi-marvel @ei77777 @spacecrumbs @scarlettghost13 @rocks-are-pretty-odd @confessionsofastrugglingteen @easilydistractedwriter @arttasticgreatnessoftheawesome77 @fluffyllamaswearinghats @milktearose @lcyouinhell @h0tshotholland @dontmesswithmemundane @southsidesarcasticwriter @helnik-s @lilith-akemi @fire-in-her-veinz @unlikelysamwinchesteronahunt @mischievousbellerina @kcd15

~ scroll here ~

@mellowgirl01 @lokislilcaribbeanprincess @allthingzhiddleston @scorpionchild81 @lokixme @blue-automne @devilbat @kangaroobunny @end-up-well @planetariumx @sarcsep @mrfandomtastic @amaru163 @im-way-too-many-fandoms @caswinchester2000 @kybaeza @wester-than-west @vintagesunshinebitch @adefectivedetective @poetic-nikolai @moonduhsted @kerri-masson @iamverity @innaminitus @spnbarnes @narcissxblack @woohoney @anxiousamandapanda @padmeisgay @authordreaming13 @lokisironthrone @theunknowinglys

~ scroll here ~

@highfuncti0ningfangirl @epicfallenismine @stubby-toe-589331 @fandomnerdsarecool @retrofantasyland @arch-venus25 @forever-trapped-in-my-dreams @littleredstarfish @marshyrebelcloud @okie–loki @atterodominatus @stfxlou @pandacookieowo @tonakings @shinisenko @tinchentitri @nildespirandum @thefallenbibliophilequote @vodka-and-some-sass @highfunctioningfangirl19 @sadwaywardkid @lokioneshot @brooksaza @wild-honey-piy @ellaenchanted91 @watermelon-lights19 @just-another-romantic @skinny-macncheese @lokisironthrone @rorybutnotgilmore

~ scroll here ~

@toozmanykids @brooklyn-times @nonsensicalobsessions @londonisacountry @peterparkerbabyyy @rogvewitch

#loki x reader #dad!loki #loki imagine #loki reader insert #domestic!loki #morgan stark #daddy!loki #loki fluff #morgan x elliot #elliot lokason #loki laufeyson #loki fanfiction

[bbq-hawks-wings]

I sometimes feel like this discourse with hero stans and villain stans was the fault of the series deliberately using a 2 sided conflict and that's just feels like weak writing to me? Like the nuance that horikoshi is showing currently isn't enough? Like nobody on the hero's side really validates the villain's criticism against them except maybe endeavor, mt. Lady, bakugo and even then do the villain's criticism against them invalidate the lives they save? The change endeavor and bakugo are undergoing? Do the lov members question the morality of their actions? If what they're doing is what they really want and the best way yo achieve it? This is a black and white conflict. An us vs them

I 100% agree! With exception of Toga and Deku, Ochako, and Hawk's pity only just now starting to introduce nuance into the narrative, it's just black and white. Well, actually, that honor technically goes to Gentle Criminal and La Brava, but people love to pretend their place in the story doesn't matter.

Part of the problem is how easy it is to be labeled a villain and how hard it is to earn the title of hero. For one you have to go through years of training, have connections to a support item company, register with the government, meet certain standards all around, and pass tests to earn a license that can be taken away. For the other you just have to make one bad decision for any number of reasons that goes sideways, and that's it forever.

I've been wondering, though, is this the "first time" a more nuanced look at the villains next to the heroes has actually even been plausible? Like, I'm trying to think back at the times heroes and villains have clashed, and the villains have had the dial set to 11 which made it harder for heroes to overcome their bias long enough to hear what they're consistently terrible at expressing. It's hard to hear their thoughts about how they feel unfairly excommunicated from society in the middle of a fight, especially when you've had this perception of what a villain is culturally stamped into the public consciousness for hundreds of years.

For Uraraka, I think seeing Toga cry at her answer to her question, and for Deku to see Shigaraki still literally fighting an inward battle was enough to get the ball rolling for them that whatever it is that drove them to this point is not as simple as someone deciding to be evil for fun or because they think they're better or above others. It's a first step towards getting to the root of why they became villains in the first place, and not just putting out fires after they've erupted. Even with all that said, though, the villains have to show some initiative to prove they're willing to pay for their crimes and do the right thing to reintegrate. Toga's the closest example we have right now (that isn't Gentle or La Brava) but she's not there yet. I hope she will be, though.

I do want the villains to answer for what they've done, but it would be hypocritical of me to be cheering for Endeavor's redemption and not offering the same opportunity to characters who would genuinely be willing to change with the necessary support. My only hope is that the series doesn't pull a Naruto which kept single-mindedly chasing after Sasuke long after I thought he was past saving. (I think, I dropped it after everyone but Naruto gave up on him and the series chose to focus on that instead.)

Some villains are absolutely still within reach, and if they can be saved I hope they would be. Some have seemed to long made up their minds, though, and it's an important perspective to keep that not everyone even can be saved or wants to be saved no matter how hard you try. It's a hard conversation to have about making calls and whatnot, but it's absolutely necessary to have when the problem is this severe.

#she speaks

[jowritesthingss]

Un-Convention-al

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Pairing(s): Logince (Logic | Logan + Creativity | Roman)

Rating: Teen (for swearing and Remus being Remus)

Content Warning(s): some swearing, a couple of typical Remus-like comments (nothing too bad here tho), food

Length: 3,679 words

Brief Summary: Soulmate September, day one! While at a convention, Roman ponders his rather unconventional soulmark. And maybe, just maybe...he might find the person whose name is encoded onto his arm.

TS Masterlist + AO3 Links

*

“Heyy, Spock!”

Roman rolled his eyes as his brother raced over to a black-haired, pointy-eared cosplayer. This had to be the stupidest thing he had ever done, and this wasn’t the first time Remus had dragged him into weird shit, so that was really saying something.

Watching as Remus spoke excitedly with the dude, Roman couldn’t help but wonder why he had allowed his brother to drag him to one of his nerd convention thingies. The only acceptable thing about this was that this Captain James T. Kirk character was obviously exactly like him, so even if he was acting as some geeky TV show character, at least it was a valorous protagonist, he supposed.

Roman tapped his foot impatiently, looking around the hotel lobby at all of the booths advertising anime and mango and cartoons and whatnot. Yeah, yeah, he was supposed to be supportive of his brother and whatnot after everything, but couldn’t he have held off the supporting thing until tomorrow, at least? Roman could’ve—should’ve—been across town, meeting that famous soulmate linguist guy that was in town, but nooo.

Remus snagged the cosplayer by the wrist and dragged him over, grinning madly underneath his facial prosthetics. Which, of course Remus had to choose one of the weird characters to cosplay—what was his name? Wolf? Wharf? “You two match! We gotta get a picture!”

“Very well.” Sighing and rolling his eyes, Roman acquiesced, moving over to the poor kid. He slung one terra-cotta arm around the kid’s shoulder, striking up a pose. Best to let Remus have and do what he wanted without fighting too too much; then maybe he’d get tired sooner and they could leave sooner.

Remus backed up, bringing out his phone to take the picture. “All right, say tribble!” Remus called to them.”

“Say what?” Roman puzzled, while the cosplayer said, “That is highly nonsensical and—”

The flash of the camera interrupted them both.

“Fuck yeah,” Remus enthused. He looked appraisingly between Roman and the other cosplayer, and nope, Roman did not like that look one bit. Remus always got that look when he was up to no good. “Say, Spocksie,” he drawled, “if you’re not meeting up with anyone, wanna hang with us today?”

“I could’t possibly intrude in such a manner,” Spock tried to politely decline, weakly attempting to disentangle himself from Roman.

Wait but no, that was actually a good idea for once. If this guy stuck around with them, Roman wouldn’t have to deal with Remus on his own. He could share in the shame.

“Oh, but I insist!” Roman said quickly, tightening his hold ever so slightly. He winked, hoping his stunning self could win over the nerd. “As your captain, I command you,” he joked. Wait, uh. Kirk was Spock’s captain, right? Gosh, there were too many Star Trek series to keep track of. How did Remus do it?

“I...very well, if you insist,” the cosplayer said carefully. “If you truly do not mind.”

“Of course we don’t mind!” Roman let go of the guy to splay a hand across his yellow-clad chest. “I’m sure you’ll love the chance to bask in my glorious presence.”

Spock turned to look at Remus, who was practically vibrating with energy. “Tell, me, is he in character or is he always like this?” He raised an eyebrow. “I do not recall Captain Kirk being so...self-absorbed.”

Roman squawked as beside him Remus howled with laughter, and maybe this wasn’t such a good idea after all.

---

To retaliate for the whole “self-absorbed” comment, Roman sentenced the Spock cosplayer to sitting in a panel for an hour with Remus, while Roman aimlessly played on his phone outside the auditorium, thankful that they only had two tickets and that the rest of the tickets had sold out before they got there.

Judging from the smile on the kid’s face as he and Remus walked out of the door, debating amongst each other, he realized that sitting in a stuffy, crowded fandom panel was probably paradise for a nerd, not a punishment. Ah, well. At least he’d had time to try looking up some new online translators, even if he’d had no luck actually translating what he’d been trying to translate for five years now.

As he stood to meet the two, Roman’s right hand slipped over to his left wrist, where it slipped under the sleeve of his sleeved yellow command shirt and unconsciously began rubbing at the characters tattooed across his skin.

Soulmates were something that everyone had, and without fail, the name of your soulmate appeared on your wrist at thirteen, so there was nothing to be confused about there. And there were so many different languages and writing systems out there that having a name written in a different language or in different characters wasn’t out-of-the-ordinary, either.

What was out-of-the-ordinary, however, was that nobody could decipher the characters written across Roman’s arm.

Five years since he turned thirteen, five years since those weird-looking letters appeared on his wrist—five years of family and friends and schoolmates and teachers and even linguists gaping at them, five years of not being able to figure out what they said, what name and secret they held.

And who knows? Maybe if Roman had gone to meet that linguist instead, today could’ve been the day he finally figured it out.

But no, that wasn’t Remus’ fault. Remus had planned on this con for over a year now. He couldn’t take his frustration out on Remus.

“Did you have fun, nerds?” he asked as he strode up to them.

“I got to ask about pon farr.” Remus grinned leeringly, and Roman wasn’t exactly sure what he was talking about, but he was fairly certain that he didn’t want to know. “And Spocky-wocky here totally nerded out about Klingon.”

“Oh. Uh. Excellent,” Roman said jerkily. Did he want to know what that was, either?

His grumbling stomach made the decision that no, he most decidedly did not. At least, not for the moment.

“Why don’t we find something to eat?” Roman asked the two. “I don’t know about you two, but I myself am famished.”

Remus immediately turned and flounced away from the two of them. “Sounds dee-lightful to me, broski. I saw this stand selling astronaut food!”

Roman and the cosplayer—Roman really would have to ask his name at some point, he couldn’t just keep calling them “Spock”—hurried after Remus, and soon enough, the three were eating (more like gagging on) freeze-dried ice cream, animatedly discussing Kirk and some gal Uhura who apparently had been part of the first interracial kiss on television (“Could be gayer,” Roman said. “Could be gayer,” Remus agreed, staring mournfully at the empty packet in his hand. He had been the only one to actually enjoy the space food.)

The conversation had moved to Kirk and Spock, Remus adamantly insisting that the two had been more than friends and coworkers. He and the Spock cosplayer had a rather lively debate over it—none of which Roman understood in the slightest, so he let himself get distracted. He couldn’t help but wonder what the cosplayer would look like beneath the cosplay. The guy’s bright eyes were mighty pretty while he argued with Remus.

Mid-sentence, Remus’ eyes drifted over to Roman, and he looked away, hoping his staring hadn’t been caught. He wasn’t one to look at people that weren’t his soulmate—all the same, when you didn’t know what your soulmate’s name was, it was quite hard not to. If Remus got any ideas, though, Roman was doomed.

Sure enough, That Look appeared in Remus’ mischievous brown eyes, and he abruptly interrupted the debate to announce that he was going to go buy some more food, racing off before either Roman or the Spock cosplayer could respond.

Roman and the cosplayer instinctively turned to exchange a glance with each other, then Roman quickly looked away, flushing. Now he’d realized that the dude was kinda attractive for a nerd, he couldn’t stop thinking about it.

Great.

“So,” Roman said awkwardly in an attempt to break the awkward silence between the two. He fought the urge to run a hand through his hair, reminding him that Remus’ soulmate would murder him if he messed up the borrowed blond wig.

“So,” the Spock agreed. He paused before continuing, glancing between Roman and Remus. “The two of you are...friends? Boyfriends?”

“Ew. Oh, god, no.” Roman gagged. “Ew ew ew.” He looked across the floor at his brother, standing in line to buy some odd foreign candy or something. “He’s my brother.”

Spock nodded sagely, staring as Remus paid for a handful of...something. “Your brother?”

Roman watched Remus shove the entire handful of candy in his mouth, gagging. “...He’s adopted.”

Roman caught Remus’ eye from across the room, and Remus grinned at him, his deep brown cheeks puffed out like a chipmunk as chunks of something slipped out of his mouth.

“Very adopted,” Roman emphasized.

The cosplayer let out a light chuckle, and oh, that was a nice sound. “You’re clearly out of your depth here. You are a good brother for indulging him in this.”

“I...suppose,” Roman said slowly, tamping down on the sudden rush of guilt over having wanted so badly to leave the convention. “So, do you have any siblings?”

The Spock nodded. “I have a younger brother of my own. Unfortunately, he lives across the country with our mother, so he could not come today.”

“Oh.” Roman blinked. Oh, shit. Had he just brought up a sore subject? Shit. “I’m sorry.”

“It is quite all right,” the cosplayer said mildly. “When we graduate, we have plans to attend the same university, and we see each other enough on holidays.”

“That’s good! That’s good,” Roman said. Oh, by Zeus’ thunderbolt, why were his attempts at maintaining conversation so miserable today? Usually he was so good at this.

Across the floor, Remus seemed quite content eating on his own, not coming back to the two of them standing so awkwardly together. He couldn’t rely on Remus to figure out some dorky topic to talk about.

Finally, grasping at straws, Roman lowered himself to asking about nerdstuffs. “So what was that thing Remus you were talking about during the panel? Cling wrap?”

The cosplayer looked mildly affronted, and dammit, if Roman fucked up again—

“Are you referring to Klingon?” he asked, cocking his head slightly to the side.

“Yeah! That!” Roman rushed out. “What’s that?”

The Spock gazed at him in wonderment. “You truly know nothing about Star Trek, do you.”

Roman shrugged helplessly.

“Klingon is a species of alien, alongside a language,” the cosplayer said, moving his hand up to his face and jerking it away at the last second. “Apologies, I forgot that I was wearing contacts for this cosplay.” He cleared his throat. “Your brother is cosplaying as one of the few Klingon characters, Worf. The Klingons are portrayed largely as bloodthirsty antagonists throughout the series.”

“Ah.” So that was why Remus had chosen to be one of them.

“Personally, I myself am more fascinated in their language than I am anything else,” the Spock explained. “They actually hired a linguist to create an entire language and alphabet for the series. Klingon is one of the most widely-spoken fictitious languages.”

Wait. Roman frowned, confused. “People speak fictitious languages?”

“Well, yes, of course,” the cosplayer said evenly. “All language is made-up, and besides, it is logical that dedicated fans would pick up some throughout the television shows. I myself speak a bit.”

Roman snorted. “What do ya know.” Maybe that’s something he would have to add on his list of language to look up—he had almost exhausted dead languages and alphabets, might as well see if his stupid soulmark matched a fake language. It wasn’t like it could hurt anything; he wasn’t going to find them regardless.

“Aw, you’re not making out?” Remus was back, standing in front of them once more.

“I—no, of course not!” Roman blustered.

“Why ever would you think—” the cosplayer stammered at the same time.

Remus grinned widely at them, flashing a pearly white, seemingly threatening smile.

“Wow! Would you look at the time!” Roman exclaimed loudly, not looking at all at the time. “Why don’t we go and look at some of the booths and tables, Commander Spock!” He grabbed the other cosplayer’s hand and rushed the two of them away as a snickering Remus followed from a distance.

As the trio navigated the crowds of people and tables of merch, Roman ignored the fluttery feeling in his stomach and the childish glee over how the cosplayer had yet to pull his hand out of Roman’s.

---

Before Roman knew it, the end of the day had reached them, and they were ushered out alongside other convention-goers. The rest of the day had passed much more quickly than he had expected, with someone else to share his grief over Remus being Remus, and good hour or two he had completely forgotten why he’d been sulking about going in the first place.

Roman, Remus, and the cosplayer that Roman still hadn’t gotten the name of lingered on the sidewalk outside of the Marriott. There was no real reason for them to stay, but despite the Spock cosplayer’s nerdiness, Roman had discovered a shared interest in Broadway and analyzing Disney, and he almost wanted to ask for the guy’s number, awkward and embarrassing as it was.

But Remus thankfully beat him to the punch. “Say, Jabberspocky, can I get your number? My brother over there is too boring, so he never likes to talk about nerd things. I could use more cute geeks in my life!”

The Spock nodded. “That would be amenable,” he agreed. “It has been most invigorating to discuss the intricacies of the Star Trek universe with you.” The cosplayer swung around to look at Roman, looking almost...nervous? “Would you like to exchange numbers as well? You are a worthy debate opponent when it comes to Disney media.”

“Oh.” That was a compliment, right? Well, Roman was taking it as a compliment. He preened. “Of course! It would be an honor! ...For you, of course.” He grinned jokingly.

The cosplayer rolled his eyes good-naturedly, fishing his phone out of his back pocket, unlocking it, and handing it to Roman. “If you wouldn’t mind filling out your contact information, please.”

“Most certainly!” Roman pulled out his own phone and tossed it at the Spock cosplayer, who just barely caught it with his fingertips. Aw, cute, the nerd was clumsy. He focused in on the phone in his hands, typing in his name and his phone number. “There we go.”

When the cosplayer took his phone back, he glimpsed briefly at their contacts in his phone, then glanced away.

He froze.

Baffled, Roman watched as the cosplayer’s wide eyes retrained themselves down on the cell phone screen.

“Is...is everything all right?” Roman asked, feeling a spark of worry. Did they somehow know each other from elsewhere? Had he or Remus done or said something in the past?

“Oh, my,” the cosplayer said in a slightly-strangled voice. “We...I never asked what your names are, did I?”

“No, I don’t think so.” Roman mock-bowed. “Roman Sanders, at your service.” He gestured over at his brother, grinning. “And that oaf is Remus.”

“Oh, my,” the cosplayer repeated, breathless. He looked almost anxiously up at Roman. “My name is Logan Lehrer.”

Roman smiled reassuringly. “A most lovely name!”

“Is it....” The Spock cosplayer—no, Logan—hesitated. “Is it, by any chance, a familiar name?”

Furrowing his brow slightly, Roman pondered it. “...I don’t believe so,” he said at long last. “Why? Do we know each other from elementary school, or middle school, perhaps?”

“No, I just—” Logan sucked in a breath. He fiddled with the hem of his blue science shirt. “May I—” he said haltingly. “May I see your wrist?”

“My wrist?” Roman tilted his head, bewildered. He held out his right wrist. “Why?”

“No, no, I mean your—here.” Logan reached out a shaky hand, gently grasping at Roman’s left wrist. And—oh.

Oh.

Roman held his breath as Logan slowly tugged back his sleeve. There was no way—was there? Or...maybe?

Logan stared at the white symbols etched across Roman’s tannish brown skin. The five symbols, Roman now realized. Five symbols, five letters...just like Logan’s name, maybe?

Then Logan began to laugh.

Roman blinked. He had only known the guy for, like, six hours, max, but the quiet, reserved nerd he had seen so far did not seem like the type to burst into mad fits of laughter.

“Are—are you all right?” Roman asked, totally lost. What was happening here?”

“Oh my—” Logan wheezed, and Roman now was genuinely concerned. Should he call an ambulance? Should he go back inside and find the medics they had at the event?

“Whatever is going on that’s so funny?” Roman questioned.

Trying and failing to speak through the chuckles running through his body, Logan rolled up the sleeve of his shirt and practically shoved his wrist in Roman’s face, still trembling from laughter and nearly whacking him in the face.

“Oi—” Roman prepared to snap, mildly offended, but the name written across Logan’s wrist caught the words in his throat.

Roman.

Sweet Sif, Roman was Logan’s soulmate. That meant—

That meant Logan was Roman’s soulmate. That mean that, whatever language it was written in, Logan’s name was written on his arm. Logan’s. Logan.

“It’s,” Logan wiped a tear of mirth from the corner of his eye, straightening up and slowly composing himself again. “Th-that is my name on your wrist, Roman.”

“It is?” he heard himself say dumbly, as if from a distance away, still not sure that this was really happening.

“It is,” Logan confirmed. He carefully lifted Roman’s wrist to his face and traced the characters with a thin fingertip.

Roman bit back a whimper. Oh, god, he never wanted Logan to stop touching him. Hell if that sounded inappropriate.

“This is my name,” Logan said, struggling to maintain a straight face, “in Klingon.”

Roman was silent for a good minute, processing this information, until finally he realized, “Wait, Klingon? Like, that made-up alien nerd language?”

Logan’s cool facade cracked, and he grinned down at Roman’s wrist, cheeks a rosy red. “Indeed, it is ‘that made-up alien nerd language’ Klingon.”

“Why the hell...?” Roman wondered, bemused.

“I am afraid that I have no idea,” Logan informed him, still scrutinizing Roman’s wrist. “There have been records of soulmate names being written in Ancient Greek and the like before, but I don’t think anyone has recorded any in Klingon before.”

Roman could have puzzled over this for ages more, but as it finally occurred to him, this was his soulmate standing in front of him. Shouldn’t he do something about that?

Wriggling his left wrist out of Logan’s loose grasp, he cupped the other teen’s face gently in his hands. Logan’s pale whitish green makeup was coming off in his hands, and the two of them no doubt looked ridiculous from an outsider’s perspective, but he found that it didn’t matter to him in the moment.

“I must say,” Roman said quietly. “While unexpected, this is most certainly not an unwelcome development.” A suave grin danced its way across his face. “I’ve been eyeing you all day, cutie.”

Logan’s breath puffed out softly against Roman’s face. “I....” The loquacious cosplayer seemed lost for words again as he pressed closer. “I—”

“Oh, go get a room already!” a warbly voice interrupted them.

Roman and Logan sprang apart, their cheeks heating up equally in embarrassment.

“Yeah, that’s right,” Remus grumped. “I’m still here.” After a moment, though, he brightened. “Oh, wait! This means you two can go on double dates with me and Janus and we can make out and embarrass you!”

“Please, do not,” Roman groaned, He reached out for Logan once more, reveling in the tiny squeak he let out, and he buried his face in Logan’s hair. “You ruin everything, asshole.” It was a playful jab, though; without Remus there to drag him to the convention, he might not have ever even met Logan.

So it had been a good thing after all that Roman had gone with Remus to this geeky convention thing, instead of to hear that linguist’s lecture. All the linguists in the world couldn’t have helped him beyond deciphering the words on his wrist. All the linguists in the world couldn’t have quite literally grabbed his soulmate by the arm and dragged him over, like Remus did.

“Thank god!” Remus realized, gleeful. “This means you’ll finally stop complaining about being lonely forever!”

“We’re soulmates,” Logan realized, sluggish. “We—I have your name on my wrist. You have my name on your wrist.”

“Oh my god,” Roman realized, dismayed. “This means I have a nerd language stuck on my arm for the rest of my life!”

Although, if it meant being with Logan for the rest of his life...perhaps a permanent nerd tattoo was a small price to pay.

Roman untangled himself from Logan and pulled away, biting back a grin when Logan instinctively chased after him. “Wanna come get milkshakes with us?”

“That would be satisfactory.” Logan nodded his assent. “However, we might want to take off our cosplays first.”

“Nah,” Roman dismissed. As a theatre kid he’d been to plenty of Steak ’n Shakes in full stage makeup, and he was pretty sure all the local Cookouts knew his order by heart at this point. “That’s part of the fun!”

Roman reached out and grasped Logan’s hand in his own, pulling him with as Remus began honest-to-god skipping to the car. The three broke into easy banter about the best milkshake flavors, and this time Roman couldn’t hold back the grin as Logan passionately decried the practice of dipping fries in shakes.

A small price to pay, indeed.

Fin

Day 1 || Day 2

*

Day one of @tsshipmonth2020​ ’s Soulmate September! I’m almost an hour late in my time zone, but hey! It’s still September first in Alaska, so this totally counts as on time! ...Right?

Want to be added onto any of my taglists? Shoot me an ask or a message here or via my other social media!

#tsshipmonth2020 #tsshipmonth #sanders sides #thomas sanders sides #ts #tss #logince #ts roman #ts creativity #roman sanders #ts logan #ts logic #logan sanders #ts remus #ts dark creativity #remus sanders #ts soulmate au #ts fanfic #ts fanfiction #jwt sanderssides #soulmate september #cw swearing #cw food

[ymiwritesstuff]

how abouuut a revali x reader where he’s in love with her and he keeps on trying to confess but the other champions keep on interrupting him (maybe even on purpose because it’s funny lol) and you can decide how he ends up finally telling her :-) thank you so much!

AWWW poor Vali he’s such a precious boi. Thanks for the request and I hope you enjoy!!

No More Interruptions

The Legend of Zelda: Breath of The Wild

Revali x Reader

Summary: Despite the appreciation Revali should hold for the other Champions, their devious actions as of late have made him more than irritated.

The Champions were mighty warriors respected by almost everyone. Their skills far exceeded that of a normal Hyrulean’s and it was clear as day why each champion was chosen to pilot their Divine Beast. They paid each other great respect whilst serving under the rule of the Princess. However lately the Rito Champion has lost almost all respect for the other champions, due to a quite simple yet highly irritating reason. While it was hard to believe that Revali held any respect for anyone but himself, he did respect strong individuals with great power. Excluding a certain blond Hylian of course. This respect he held had lately been crumbling thanks to the other champion’s childish actions.

Revali couldn’t understand how in the world had they caught glimpses of his feelings towards you. He could’ve sworn he had never shown any clear signs when around them and yet they still somehow managed to gain knowledge of his emotions. This wouldn’t be a problem otherwise but what irritated Revali the most was the fact that every time he wished to confess, one or even all of the champions “conveniently” happened to stumble upon him and start a conversation about something utterly useless. This forced him to withdraw his attempt to reveal his feelings and always left a bad, bitter taste on his tongue. Revali’s sharp eyes always noticed the glint of mischievousness in Daruk’s eyes or the obvious smirk on Urbosa’s lips, indicating that it was all intentional and done to purely annoy him.

Your stretch your arms after yet another tiring meeting with the Champions at the castle. These meetings weren’t anything too special as they only involved discussions about Calamity Ganon, Divine Beasts and whatnot. Regardless you always attended them as it improved your knowledge and allowed you to be helpful in a way. The soon setting Sun hit your eyes as you exited the castle, beginning your departure much earlier than the rest. The others stayed behind for a moment, most likely talking with the Princess about topics related to their duties or Divine Beasts. You had no need to discuss such topics so you were already leaving.

“Well aren’t you in a hurry” The familiar voice of Revali causes you to turn around and face the much taller Rito. His wings are crossed and his face his neutral, although for some reason his eyes move to look at the surroundings in a sudden matter, as if he’s looking for someone following him. “And what about you then? I was under the impression that you wanted to discuss important matters with her highness” A short chuckle leaves his beak and he rolls his green eyes somewhat mockingly. Perhaps now was the time. “While it is true I have some important matters to discuss, they’re not to be discussed with the Princess” You raise a curious brow at his question, crossing your arms, intrigued to know more. 

“Oh? Who might it be then?” You notice Revali taking a few steps closer to you, eyes locked on your form. This seemed familiar as you realize that he has indeed tried to talk to you about something lately, always being rudely interrupted. You hadn’t thought much of it but now that you are aware of the clear importance of whatever he’s going to say, you have to hear it. He goes to open his beak but is cut off by another voice.

“Revali! I need to talk with you” Behind him you could see Urbosa with Daruk and Mipha. She waved her hand and held a smile across her lips that had small bits of maliciousness almost being mocking in nature. Revali’s face quickly twisted in anger and before the Gerudo woman had time to say anything, the Rito practically blew up. “No, Urbosa you don’t. If you did, you’d be kind enough to wait for me to finish my business with (Name) here, and not barge in and force yourself to our conversation like a total idiot! Now if you’ll excuse me, I have things to take care of!” Nobody had time to say anything else as Revali quickly took off to the sky, flying towards his village. His sudden rage surprised you as you had never seen him like that and frankly, no one dared to talk back to Urbosa. 

You glance at the Gerudo with narrow eyes as you wondered why on earth was she like that. “Urbosa, care to explain what’s going on?” Urbosa merely chuckled at your question. “Perhaps he can give you the answer” She pointed at Revali whose flying form was getting farther and farther away. You sigh in slight frustration at the thought of walking all the way to Rito Village just to talk with the champion.

~

Revali’s enraged state was enough to drive everyone away from his landing, leaving the Rito by himself. Night had already fallen and most of the residents had gone to sleep anyway, which Revali didn’t mind as he really needed this moment by himself. How could he ever confess his love for you if the people around him didn’t allow it? His feelings were eating him from the inside and he only wished to let them out. 

“Have you finally calmed down?” The sound of your voice drags him out of the deep thoughts of his mind and causes him to turn his head towards you. There you were, standing at the entrance to his landing with no one else at your side. “You had something you wished to tell me, correct?” You notice Revali glancing behind you, seemingly suspicious about you being alone. You let out a deep sigh. “I’m alone. There will be no interruptions. Promise”, you calmly explain and hear him sigh. He walks to you, and prepares himself for the confession.

However it seems to be a lot more difficult than he had thought. Having the chance to finally reveal his feelings was amazing yet in the moment he can’t seem to get a single word out of his beak. “Well.. I must say that this moment is quite special and you should be honored by what I am about to say next” You stay quiet, patiently waiting for him to continue. You notice his eyes averting your gaze, his feathers puffing up a tiny bit. The vulnerability he radiated was certainly odd and yet, you found it delightful. “I enjoy your.. Company. Quite a lot. You’re intelligent, kindhearted and possess a rather great amount of skill in combat” Upon hearing his words of appreciation you feel the heat rush to your cheeks, dusting them with a red shade. Revali confidently takes your hands in his warm wings and keeps his gaze on you. “I have deep feelings for you (Name). And I... I love you” The words leave his beak faster than he can think.

You don’t seem to find the right words to respond to his confession. Your cheeks are flushed, your heart is racing and your mind is filled with similar feelings of affection. Before Revali can question your silence you let out a big laugh and lean to hug him lovingly. “This is what you’ve been trying to tell me? No wonder you got so mad earlier” Your words cause him to puff up even more due to embarrassment, but he hugs you back regardless. The feeling of you being so close to him was something he had been waiting for a long time and now it was finally a reality. No more interruptions. Revali had finally told you about his feelings and was more than happy to find out that you feel the same.

#loz #the legend of zelda #legend of zelda #legend of zelda x reader #breath of the wild #legend of Zelda breath of the wild #breath of the wild x reader #breath of the wild revali #revali #loz revali #loz revali x reader #botw revali #botw revali x reader

[minijenn]

Random Keys/UF Crossover Ideas

Because I’m torn between both of my projects right now and I hate myself, here’s something that’ll only really appeal to the very niche audience of people who read both Universe Falls and Keys to the Kingdom. Basically its a list of somewhat spoilery (for Keys more than UF) headcanons of what it might be like if the Gravity Falls world scheduled to be in Keys was a Universe Falls world instead (in the sense that it still takes place in Gravity Falls physically but like... its set in the universe of Universe Falls (oy I’m explaining too much lemme just start rambling off the random ideas that have been popping into my head over the last several days of this hypothetical crossover of my two stupid fanfics):

For reference’s sake, on the UF end of things, this would take place somewhere around the middle of arc10ish, pretty close to Weirdmageddon as the GF world in Keys is gonna take place pretty close to Weirdmageddon too. 

For Keys, the trip to this world would still take place in the same spot the GF world does, so semi close to the end of the story, as one of the last Disney worlds of the fic (guess it wouldn’t really be a “Disney” world here but ehhhhhh) 

Guess I better give some context about what’s going on in each fic around that time; UF’s is easier to do so we’ll start with that; basically without spoiling a certain upcoming arc ender too much, during arc 10, everyone’s sorta frazzled what between all of the interdimensional travel, worries about Bill coming back and causing chaos, worries about the Diamonds possibly getting involved in stuff, shaken by the recent revelation that Rose allegedly shattered Pink Diamond and so on (basically there’s a lot going on in the leadup to UF’s ending hahaha) 

Context for Keys (again without getting too spoilery (gotta tread even more careful here) is that by this point in the story Sora is basically in nonstop Panic Mode about the whole norting thing thanks to a certain encounter with one Bald Old Fuckhead during the Aladdin world immediately before this; so Sora’s on the run from basically his entire support system cause he’s all worried about unintentionally hurting his friends (and he also just doesn’t want Riku or Kairi in particular to see what’s happening to him cause Disaster Bi). 

Cont. Context for Keys cause that last bullet point was Long: Despite all this fuckin Angst, Sora’s still out searching for the Keys on his own in the hopes of securing the final few for the guardians of light before he can be fully norted and forced into handing them over to the Organization instead 

Not to mention those freak relatively dark/light powers of his are alll outta whack cause he A. Doesn’t know how to control them At All and B. Is Emotionally Distraught so that’s only making things worse

And the entire gang is more or less out searching the worlds tryin’ to find Sora (he yeeted his Gummi Phone off a fuckin cliff or something just so nobody could get in touch with him smh what a waste of a perfectly good cell phone); among the teams that are out doing so include the one we’re gonna focus on here, Ven and Roxas  

Back to the UF end of things, I wanna talk about where each of the Mystery Kids are at this point; Steven is sorta all over the place with, again, the revelation that his mom could have been a murderer; Dipper is hella nervous about the idea of Bill getting his hands on the Rift (even moreso after RMD cause PTSD is Somethin Else kids), Mabel is in that mindset of not wanting the summer to end so they can all stay together, and Connie is basically (as usual) the only one with any brain cells as she’s trying to hold the gang together

(lowkey spoilers for the Keys GF chapters start here) So Sora arrives in Gravity Falls, suffering from all the angsts and anxieties and whatnot and just Not Having a Very Good Time Emotionally/Mentally as he starts lookin around for the Key in the woods or whatever

But lo and behold everyone’s favorite Evil Corn Chip just so happens to be spyin’ on him, and before too long Bill makes his appearance and acts all friendly to Sora, claiming that he can basically undo the whole norting thing (which he knows all about because of course he would, this is Bill Fucking Cipher we’re talking about here)

Sora’s skeptical but at the same time he’s sort of willing to do whatever he can at this point to keep his heart from being taken over by Mr. Bald Old Fuckhead and all Bill is asking for in return is for him to nab some sparkly snow globe that he claims already belongs to him but was stolen by some local family who Bill makes out to be pretty bad so hey, why not at least give it a shot? (dumb, the kid is dumb this is something we’ve established many times over by this point)

So Sora sets out to look for both the rift and the Key (while also being harangued by Xemnas who’s the Org. baddie of the GF world but errrrr i don’t have a ton of ideas about what he’s gonna do yet so we’ll just skip over that for now and focus on somethin else)

Something else being the fact that Sora happens upon a bunch of kids being attacked by a group of Nobodies, so he swoops in to save them even though the kids already look like they’re holding their own pretty well against them (two of them are out here swinging swords around, one’s really handy with that grappling hook while another one has some sort of magical shield? Its weird??? But cool imo) 

So they all team up to take the Nobodies out and following that, Sora meets and mostly hits it off with the Mystery Kids

Mabel is super hype (she kinda instantly crushes on Sora as soon as she sees him even though he’s too fuckin old for her); Steven and Sora radiate the same sort of Sweet But Sad energy so of course they’re best friends immediately 

Connie’s a lil bewildered by Sora (who the hell goes around swinging a giant key like its a sword, that’s just not practical???) but Dipper’s distrustful radar is instantly raised for a a number of reasons, but the biggest red flag he notices about Sora by far is that his eyes are yellow (btw by this point his eyes will more or less be completely yellow and his hair almost entirely white; he usually wears his hood up to try and hide that, but it got blown off during the forementioned fight) 

So the kids were out and about in the woods for mystery hunting reasons, mostly cause they were trying to cool their heads from all of the stress they’re under mentioned earlier (and cause hey, the summer’s ending soon and they gotta spend all the time they can together at this point) 

However, they quickly change gears when they learn about Sora’s quest to find some magical Key and they all eagerly decide they wanna help with that cause it sounds hella rad; Dipper would likely be the only dissenter to this plan, but he’d be lowkey about it, kinda deciding to keep a suspicious eye on Sora all the while (he doesn’t really act like he’s being possessed by Bill, but ya can never be too sure nowadays...) 

So they all set out in search of the Key (Sora decides not to tell them about Bill or the rift just yet, but even so right off the bat he’s basically decided “yes I’m adopting all four of these kids as my new little brothers and sisters and no one can stop me”)

So cut to the other end of things and we have Ven and Roxas who have basically only just met each other face to face for the first time (they’re both basically constantly doin that spiderman look alike meme); they’ve been more or less teamed up to look for Sora together tho, and they both got a massive guilt complex about the whole thing cause they used to be able to directly protect him inside his heart but now they can’t since they’re out of it so they’re determined to find him and make sure he’s OK

They also show up in Gravity Falls, arriving much closer to the Mystery Shack and the Gem Temple than Sora did; since its the closest thing nearby, the boys decide to venture over to the Mystery Shack to look first 

After some brief, confused yet fun conversation with Soos and Wendy, they bump into Stan and that initial meeting goes something like: 

Stan: Who the hell are you two supposed to be? You twins or something?

Roxas: No??? What the fuck is a twin??

Ventus, realizing that Roxas has like 0 real world experience or regard for world order at that moment right fucking there: (oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck) Ummmm YES WE ARE WE’RE TOTALLY TWINS AHAHA AREN’T WE BROTHER?

Roxas, immensely confused: What the hell is a brother??

And then Ford shows up and Roxas looks between him and Stan is just like “ooooh ok now I get what a twin is” and Ven is just like “oh my god I think Roxas managed to catch some of Sora’s stupidity after all asdkjalsdkalsd” 

Anyway after all this awkward confusion is over, Roxas and Ven bring up that they’re there looking for someone, and while neither Stan nor Ford are that invested, they do offhandedly mention maybe the Crystal Gems can help

Ironically enough, the Gems happen to burst into the shack right then and there, taking refuge from the surge of strange creatures swarming outside (Nobodies & Heartless); the Gems are rather overwhelmed by them since their weapons don’t work that great on them so they’ve come to seek Ford’s help (since he’s got all those weapons and lasers and shit he keeps stockpiled) 

In this Ven and Roxas end up meeting the Gems and both of them are just like :O (Ven’s lowkey like, “Aqua would get along great with these ladies, they’re total badasses just like her!”) and the Gems just kinda pass the boyos off like “yeah whatever there’s a fuckton of monsters outside meanwhile where are our kids?”

Stan and Ford are like *shrug* cause neither of them are very good at being Responsible when it comes to keeping an eye on these danger-prone kids and the Gems are just like *facepalm* “Morons” so they set out to find the kids and Ven and Roxas are like “well they know their way around here so why not go with them to see if we can find Sora too!” and so they all head out on a lil adventure

Then a whole bunch of stuff happens on both sides of the plot that I haven’t bothered to figure out; bunch of cute character interactions and whatever; insert possible second encounter with Xemnas in here somewhere where he basically shows up just to intimidate Sora but Sora’s like “no way jose, you touch any of these precious kiddos and you’ll Die” 

Somewhere in here, under... some circumstances, Sora and the MK make it back to the shack but like... everyone’s gone? (cause they all went out to look for them, didn’t even leave a note, fuckin rude) 

They search the house for anybody and then, on complete fuckin accident, Sora finds his way down into the basement (the portal room to be exact) and what else does he find down there but that thing Bill asked him to get (the rift)! 

Though he’s a little confused about why its there (Bill did say some awful family “stole” the rift from him, but none of the MK are awful, they a bunch of Good Kids); Sora still pockets it like a desperate dummy dumb anyway and doesn’t say a word about it to the kids because he thinks they might be too innocent and young to know anything about it anyway (he’s wrong of course because much like him these kids are Traumatized with a capital T but we’ll just ignore that for now)

Still on the search for that Key, Sora and the kids head out only to run right into Stan, Ford, and the Gems on the way out; course, Ven and Roxas are still with them and they see Sora and they’re like :D while Sora’s just like “aw fuck” and runs away from his problems like always

So he rushes off into the woods and who else would show up but that Motherfuckin Evil Corn Chip again who’s like “yo kid ya got the stuff” and Sora’s just like “brb having a panic attack rn” but then he ends up obliviously handing the rift over anyway cause again he’s incredibly desperate for any way out of his current horrible situation

Of course because I’m a sap for Drama, he happens to do so just as all four of the MK show up, having followed him into the woods and ohohohoh boy oh boy let’s just say them seeing Sora just up and giving the rift over to Bill would be a Moment (well, at least for Steven and Dipper cause they actually know what the fuckin rift is unlike Mabel and Connie who still wouldn’t at that point) 

So basically Bill is a little shit and takes the rift, but he can’t actually fuckin do anything with it cause he’s a physical object and he’s still intangible (or somethin like that idk I just don’t want Weirdmageddon to happen cause it would make things too complicated) so he’s like “fuck gotta find some stupid sap to possess so I can smash this dumb thing” and he nearly targets Sora (cause the kid was already stupid enough to help him in the first place so why not?) until Steven ends up being the one to fend him off using his shield 

Bill shrugs it off and makes off with the rift anyway (its like... hovering or something? idk I’m running out of steam) and everyone panics of course, especially Sora cause he’s just like “well shit I certainly Fucked Up didn’t i?” and the MK are both a mix of “YOU THINK?” (from Dipper and Connie mostly) and “imo not your fault Bill’s tricked just about all of us he’s an asshole” (from Steven and Mabel)

Amidst this a bunch of lil things also happen; the Stans and the Gems show up (along with Ven and Roxas), basically everyone is immensely confused (aka those who have no idea what the fucking rift is) and alarmed (those who do know what the rift is) that Bill has what he needs to more or less fuck the entire world over 

So everyone just decides to put everything aside and team up all together to track Bill down and get the rift back before he can break it (there’s a lot of heartwarming trust moments in here, mostly cause trust is like... the cornerstone theme of the GF chapters in Keys for obvious reasons) 

They eventually do find him and *insert big epic battle scene here* where everyone teams up to basically beat Bill to death or whatever (don’t ask me how they be doin that if he’s intangible, again I.... I’m tired and this post is long enough as it is) 

Yadda yadda yadda they beat him, get the rift back and effectively prevent Weirdmageddon from happening to begin with (which just does SO much wonderful fuckery for UF’s timeline moving forward but whatever, this ain’t about that) 

Oh and during that Climactic Battle Scene somewhere there’s some bit about Sora learning to better trust others/himself that leads to him getting the world’s Key? I-I I dunno its a work in progress...

Anyway after this there’s a lot of good character interactions all around, reconciliations between the UF characters and the Keys characters, particularly between Sora and the MK (again he’s adopted these kiddos and don’t you forget it)

So with the Key in hand, Sora starts to leave and Roxas and Ven almost convince him to go back with them until *insert Big Keys Spoiler here that results in the Organization getting their hands on that Key Sora just got and also results in Sora running away again cause... reasons*

And that’s the end of the chapters or whatever idk 

There’s probably more ideas I had in mind for this but I literally can’t do anymore my brain is dying 

I might possibly write this for reals someday i dunno I’m stuck in two personal hells here so I might as well combine ‘em

Yes I’m aware this post leans more heavily on Keys than UF but its set in the world of UF so fuck off 

Feel free to add on with any thoughts you might have about the idea

I’m tired

Amen 

#jen writes #universe falls #keys to the kingdom #long post is loooooong #headcanons #ideas #who am i kidding i will literally never do anything with this idea ofther than this very fucking post #then again... i like Angst :) #and UF and Keys both got plenty of it

[catflowerqueen]

Number 2 of your prompts, please!

I’ll assume that this was in response to the first set. If it wasn’t, just let me know and I can talk about #2 from the second set in another post.

2. Grovyle’s new family situation

This one is probably one of the more subject to change, since I’m still figuring out the logistics of things, and one that is going to require a fair amount of build-up.

One of the biggest issues facing the denizens of the changed future is the fact that what essentially happened is that the new reality and the old, alternate reality got smashed together and aren’t quite clicking the way they should. Dialga managed to do a lot in terms of physical rebuilding and fixing things, but due to the nature of the event and the fact that the “higher power/tier” that he alluded to during the special episode had never done something like this before and only really had a basic idea of how to actually accomplish what they were trying to, he couldn’t get everything. So part of what Grovyle and the others do as part of the New Planetary Investigation Squad is to go and… well, investigate, and help out where they can.

But as I said, that is just the physical aspect. And only a part of it.

Something that will eventually get brought up in story (hopefully) is how powerful Relatia really is, and the way she utilizes those powers. A large part of what she does is simply to make sure that time and space are flowing smoothly with no unresolved paradoxes or issues, which is something that was briefly touched upon in the epilogue, and sometimes this necessitates going back through time. As one could imagine, and given the very premise of why Dusknoir was trying to stop Grovyle from changing the future, making big changes in the past can and will often have extremely detrimental consequences on the future if one doesn’t know what they are doing. This is also a big factor in why the celebi species has to be so careful about what they do, and why they are biologically drawn to spend most of their time on a linear path, in the time period they actually come from originally.

It is entirely possible, and, indeed, has actually happened, that Relatia must go into the past and alter the future somehow. Typically the changes are small and people do not really notice, outside of feelings of deja vu. Sometimes this results in her splitting timelines apart and isolating some in special spacial pockets that cannot be interacted with. But when she can’t do that and the changes are too large… you get a situation like what would have happened to the denizens of the dark future had the being Dialga alluded to not intervened. In a case like this, Relatia would do her best to keep everything as similar as possible–engineer situations which would still allow peoples’ ancestors to meet so that they could still be born, working with fellow Pantheon members to ensure natural disasters and whatnot happen when they should so that certain things happen, etc., but that doesn’t mean that she can preserve everything, which is… kind of the point, really, since the entire idea was to change things. But she makes sure that no one remembers the alternate path so that they won’t feel any pain about alternate events which can never happen now. Also so they don’t get confused by all the things that are now different.

Unless, of course, she decides to isolate people from the time stream while she makes the changes before dropping them back in. In which case they would remember everything that happened in the other timeline and, typically, also have memories of the new one they’ve been added into. Which can lead to some confusing situations at times, since it means that they would basically have double memories. 

The thing is, Relatia generally only goes for this route when she gets so incensed at someone that she wants to punish them for something. She can get very, very wrathful at times, and if she wants to mess with the timeline and make it fray and break apart or take unnatural paths, she totally can. You were a ruler in the original timeline, who had everything you ever wanted at your fingertips? Too bad, Relatia is mad at you and now you are a penniless nobody with all the memories of things that you can now never have again because your situation has changed, and you’re the only one who knows it. Oh, and the love of your life who, tragically, died young in an accident? Well, they might be alive now because of the changed circumstances… but they now have no clue who you are, and your attempts to tell them the “truth” just make you come off as a crazy person. Oh, and somehow, in some unexplained way the children you had with the love of your life in the old timeline still exist, and, yes, those really are your kids, a DNA test could probably prove it, even though–again–you and the love of your life never met in this life… but they don’t know who you are either. You do have some vague memories now of donating your genetic material, however…

So you can see how something like this would be a devastating punishment.

But in a case like the Dark Future… would that still be the case? Yes, things would be a lot different than you remember… but wasn’t that the entire point of what the Planetary Investigation Team wanted to do? And you fully agreed to nonexistence in the hopes of fixing the problem, but now you get to live! And, sure, sometimes it gets a little confusing when you have memories both of growing up in a dark world and one filled with light… and the memories of the dark world often aren’t the nicest—in fact, some of them are downright cruel, and you were often a jerk, and yet… isn’t it good to have them both? They prove that you survived a terrible ordeal and still came out fine on the other side, and now you don’t have to be a jerk to survive any more. You can just… heal. And you aren’t alone in this either—everyone who was still alive at the time that the future was saved is in the exact same boat as you. And, hey, with all the skills you gained, you can totally help the ones around you who do not remember the ordeal you went through–because they were either dead at the time or circumstances made it so that they were never born in the first place—survive all these weird paradoxes and anomalies that have now cropped up. …As well as help them move the giant piles of rubble and crumbling buildings that Dialga couldn’t get to for whatever reason.

So that’s what essentially happened here—rather than everyone disappear into non-existence, those that were alive at the time of the future being saved were re-integrated into the new timeline in the same manner as how Relatia does it when exacting punishments. Of course, given how wonky that entire situation was, things get complicated when it comes to establishing ancestry. Some pokemon who got together in the dark future would not have in the fixed one, so not everyone would get doubled memories since they literally would not have existed in any form without the intervention. And some people are obviously going to have an easier time integrating those memories than others, not to mention that there a bunch of people who will only remember the fixed future, so there is definitely going to be an adjustment period for that, and some things/people might never get reconciled fully—luckily everyone pretty much knows what/why this all is happening, because the Partner (Paula) did as promised and spread the story around, so people are going to catch on pretty quick to what is going on when people start freaking out and shouting about how surprised they are to still be alive when seconds ago they were very calmly eating their lunch or whatever. (Don’t ask me exactly how many generations have passed. I don’t really know at this time, and am trying to be intentionally vague about it).

So then, getting back to your initial request… Grovyle’s problem is that he now has a living, biological family… that remembers nothing about the dark future, since his parents and grandparents both died when he was still a child—and an only child, at that. In this life his father is still dead—a tragic accident during a routine exploration/rescue mission years ago—but his mother had retired from that life so that she could raise him and his little sister—who did not exist in the dark future. This causes a lot of friction, since he now has trouble relating to them, and reconciling the mother he once had to the one he has now. Don’t get him wrong—he’s extremely grateful that they are alive, and that they exist, but… it’s hard, when the formative memories that resonate with him most strongly now are those from the dark future.

Luckily for him, according to his memories from the fixed future (which eventually catch up to him… probably the next day? Once the group on the Pinnacle descends and gets the chance to rest and re-group with the sableye gang) he had already more or less left home in order to follow in his father’s footsteps as… a member of the Planetary Investigation Team? Who work under Dialga? Huh. Well, okay then. So basically as far as that goes, he and the others just decide to continue on their way and just make the new base which I’ve already posted on my tumblr… uh… quite a while ago.

It was admittedly a shock for his family when they finally figured out that he wasn’t just a normal grovyle, but THE Grovyle from the famous Paula’s story, but they’re taking things in stride. And I’m still deciding whether or not one of his new-ish female family members is named Laura (for… reasons—which in this case are actually personal and related to the original Laura, and not just because of the way the name spiked in popularity after the story got told. Not that the spike was necessarily that large to begin with, mind you, given all the strange naming conventions that pokemon in this world can have—some do give their kids personal names, some just stick with species names).

The thing about the memories, though… for some reason there seems to be a strange omission when it comes to the fate of a certain human turned treecko… which does get resolved later, but for quite a while it is very unclear what actually happened to her, and most assume that she died at the time the future was saved. The whole situation is both sad and weird, and it will be quite a while before it gets cleared up to anyone in the future—Dialga included, oddly enough. Chalk another one up to the person performing this miracle being new to this and mostly winging it—a familiarization with the concept and minimal basics, if you will.

But it ends up not really being enough of a problem that Relatia will need to come and smooth things out once she finally regained access to the world, so at least there’s that.

And roughly a third of the issues probably come from other weird things that will happen in the past/present with Paula, Laura, and the others over the course of the World’s Treasure, so there’s that, too.

Wow, this ended up really long… why can’t it be this easy to write the essays that I have to do for school?

#the world's treasure #grovyle #spoilers #pokemon mystery dungeon #explorers of sky #wow this got long

[dalishious]

Everyone talks about how creepy oghren is hitting on people and it annoys me becuase nobody points out everyone else?? Like Zevran does that to Wynne, morrigan does it to sten, leliana does it to morrigan. And all I can help feeling is that becuase oghren isn't one of the conventionally attractive characters he gets a lot more shit in the fandom

Also, my point is slightly unrelated to the last ask, everyone talks about how the dalish are so oppressed, and the mages are so oppressed but the dwarves have it really bad? Sigrun says that elven cities look great compared to dust town and again I can't help but think becuase they aren't a conventionally attractive race everyone ignores them

The Dwarves are greatly ignored by both fandom and the devs, I agree. And I wouldn’t be surprised if that is part of it. I think it also has to do with the lack of Dwarven lore and whatnot all together, in comparison to the other races.

Re: Oghren - I think it has more to do with how it’s handled. Oghren harasses the women in the party and it’s played off as a drunk joke.

Zevran is the one who comes closest to the number of times Oghren does this, when he talks about Wynne’s “bosom” as a means to avoid/end a conversation he does not wish to have/is done with. This too is supposed to be ‘joking.’

Wynne: You must know that murder is wrong, I assume.Zevran: I'm sorry... are you speaking to me?Wynne: That is why you wish to leave your Crows. A crisis of conscience.Zevran: Yes, that is exactly it.Wynne: Joke if you wish, but I have the feeling that deep down you regret the life you have lived.Zevran: It's true. I regret it all.Wynne: Must you be such a child? Are you incapable of a single, serious conversation?Zevran: I know. I am terrible and it makes me sad. May I rest my head in your bosom? I wish to cry.Wynne: You can cry well away from my bosom, I'm certain.Zevran: Did I tell you I was an orphan? I never knew my mother.Wynne: Egad. I give up.

Wynne: Have you changed your mind yet? Are you willing to speak seriously?Zevran: Of your bosom? As you wish.Wynne: (exasperated) No, I do not wish to speak of my bosom.Zevran: But it is a marvelous bosom. I have seen women half your age who have not held up half so well. Perhaps it is a magical bosom?Wynne: Stop... talking about my bosom.Zevran: But I thought you wished to speak seriously?Wynne: I do. I thought, however foolishly, that you might be willing to speak of your past.Zevran: We could do that. There have been many bosoms in my past, though only few as fine as yours.Wynne: Enough. I am ending this conversation.

Zevran: So let us pretend that I do, indeed, believe that murder is wrong.Wynne: (coldly) We are not having this conversation.Zevran: Were I to believe such a thing, what would I do with it? Feeling guilt about things one can no longer change seems to very time-consuming with little hope for actual gain.Wynne: But you could change what you do in the future.Zevran: (Sigh) What would that require, exactly? It seems to me that feeling guilty would take up a great deal of my time as it is.Wynne: Perhaps you could save a life, instead? One for every life you have taken.Zevran: That is a great many lives to save and feel guilty as well. Perhaps I could do one or the other?Wynne: It is not a game, Zevran. You either know right from wrong or you do not.Zevran: I... I am so confused. I think I may cry. May I lay my head in your bosom?Wynne: (Cry of frustration) No! No! You may not!Zevran: You are so very cruel. How is it that you do not feel guilty?Wynne: I feel guilty for having ever spoken to you.

There is this one time, though:

Zevran: You have not asked my about my conscience for some time, my darling Wynne.Wynne: That is correct. And I am not your "darling."Zevran: (Sigh) So once again I am rejected, just as I am by the cruel, cruel fates. They are harsh mistresses to the elves.Wynne: Zevran, I am old enough to be your grandmother.Zevran: You say that like it's a bad thing.Wynne: And what would you do with me if you had me, hmm? This is a game you play, nothing more.Zevran: Ha, you are a cynical woman, Wynne.Zevran: Cynical and powerful. It drives me mad with desire.Wynne: ...Wynne: I am going to walk away now.

Don’t get me wrong though, it’s not good.

In defence of Morrigan, she only talks to Sten about sex after she catches him staring at her, and takes it as ‘teasing.’

Morrigan: So are you going to continue staring at me as if I am covered in eels?Sten: Eels would be something.Morrigan: Prudery! How charming. I expected paranoia. This is much better. I prefer to be stared at lustfully, if at all.Sten: Keep trying, then.Morrigan: Oh? Then shall I demonstrate an act or two? And you may tell me hot or cold?Sten: I'll save time. Cold.Morrigan: (Chuckles) You are a tease.

...The only thing I can see when looking at the banter between Morrigan and Leliana, is Leliana telling Morrigan she’s beautiful, and wants to go shopping with her.

Leliana: You are very beautiful Morrigan.Morrigan: Tell me something I do not know.Leliana: But you always dress in such rags. It suits you I suppose. A little tear here, a little rip there to show some skin. I understand.Morrigan: You understand I lived in a forest, I hope?Leliana: Maybe we could get you in a nice dress one day. Silk. No, maybe velvet. Velvet is heavier, better to guard against the cold in Ferelden. Dark red velvet, yes. With gold embroidery. It should be cut low in the front of course, we don't want to hide your features.Morrigan: Stop looking at my breasts like that. 'Tis most disturbing!Leliana: You don't think so? And if it's cut low in the front we must put your hair up to show off that lovely neck.Morrigan: You are insane. I would sooner let Alistair dress me.Leliana: It'll be fun, I promise! We'll get some shoes too! Ah, shoes! We could go shopping together!

There’s the part where Morrigan tells her to stop looking at her chest, which she seemingly does...

But the only one I’m not really at all bothered by is Leliana and Morrigan, only because it feels more like just attempted flirting to me, and Leliana does back off when Morrigan tells her to.

#Anonymous #ask

[joonsgalaxy]

The Dark Side of the Moon

Part: 1   2   3  Pairing: Yoongi x reader Genre: romance, fluff, angst, soulmate AU, besfriend!Yoongi Word count: 8 k Summary: You’re destined to be with one particular man for the rest of your life, but what happens when your trust in fate crumbles, when the doubts slowly float to the surface of your mind and when your heart starts longing for another man? You can try to ignore all of that, but it’s still there, just like the dark side of the moon.

You spot him at one of the tables in your favourite cafe. He's immersed in his phone, thumbing the screen, with his bottom lip caught between his teeth. His hand rises to brush hair from his face and he finally notices you, when you're a few feet away from the mentioned table.

'Hello,' you greet him, quickly adding, 'Sorry for the wait, I had to discuss some things with my professor.'

'Oh, it's okay,' he assures you as you hang your backpack on the chair and sit down across from him. 'I'll go order, what do you want?'

You're quite exhausted and hungry so a cup of coffee and a cupcake should be just right. He nods before standing up and walking to the counter.

.

There are lots of about the ancient methods of finding your soulmate. Stories that you’ve heard since your childhood. Men and women would go to the local gifted people who were said to be really wise and all-knowing, who were trusted deeply and who, most importantly, were making some kind of indicators-necklaces or bracelets (you don’t really know which stories to believe)-that would help to indicate your soulmate once you meet them, or to finally realize that a person you already knew is your soulmate. Admittedly, those stories fascinate you and sometimes you wish it would still be like that, because, well, it’s different now.

When you turn a certain age you must take a test with maybe a million questions and tasks. Do you plan ahead? Do you get easily irritated? What irritates you the most? What are you looking for in your future partner? Do you eat meat? How many hours of sleep do you usually get? What is your goal in this life? Do you keep many secrets? Basically every question that you can think of that lets you to get to know a person. All of your answers go to a huge data base that sorts everything out and searches for a person the most compatible to you, living in the same district. You don’t exactly know how the system itself functions, but it was created by a bunch of respectable scientists so it must be legit, right? They say it works every time—soulmates meet, fall in love. And, quite frankly, you have no proof of them being wrong; every couple that you know gets along really well, agreeing on pretty much every decision that they make, growing together spiritually and mentally, never having quarrels with each other or anything like that. You’ve heard some stories, though. And like every other story you can’t be sure if it’s true or just false rumours that people like to spread around. You heard about some people running away from their fate, not obeying this world’s norms. It is said that a few couples in your city got separated and nobody knows where they are now, since they probably had to leave because of all the stares, negative murmurs from the people around them, because that kind of atypical behaviour is not acceptable at all.

‘That’s not true,’ your mother always dismisses those stories, ‘And if it is—they’ve made a huge mistake by leaving their soulmate like that. I’m sure they’re really unhappy right now.’

‘Careless people like them will ruin this world one day,’ your father says.

You don’t dare to question it further, because it all sounds quite scary to you; and talking about it always seems to sadden you, because you feel sorry for the people that for some puzzling reason didn’t get to experience that strong undying love for their soulmate. You wholeheartedly trust your fate and you’re convinced it will work out for you. The beautiful love between your parents gives you hope. They met each other through their mutual friends way before they had to take the test. They’ve said countless times that they were in love with each other even before they got the results and found out that they were supposed to spend the rest of their lives together. They never acted on their feelings before the results, though, because, obviously, that would be inappropriate and not smart. The results are like some sort of validation, a green light, a confirmation that a beautiful relationship is about to begin.

‘It happens sometimes,’ they’d say, ‘A heart recognizes the right person early on and all you have to do is wait for the right time.’

You would listen fondly to them talking about their love as if it was the most beautiful tale in the world, and you couldn’t wait to create your own. Daydreaming about it was a thing you used to do as a child, wondering if you already met the person you could call your soulmate one day, imagining how they’d look like, how their voice would sound when shouting honey, I’m home to you after a long day at work. Hell, you even had your future house built in your mind, with a pool, a garden full of trees and everything.

Yet, as you got older, you convinced yourself to get these thoughts out of your head and focus on the present, focus on school, friends, hobbies and whatnot, just like the other kids your age. It’ll happen when it’s supposed to happen, you told yourself.

However, you’d be lying if you said you weren’t nervous on the test day. As much as it was exciting, it was nerve wrecking as well. Doing the test meant your name would be inserted to the system the moment you finish it, and being in the system meant you can get a letter with the name of your soulmate any day after that.

.

So here you are now, sitting in a cafe with your soulmate on a nice day in the middle of May, finishing your coffee and the cupcake, which was probably the best cupcake you've ever tasted (most likely because you were so hungry), when your phone vibrates against the table. It lets you know you received a message from your friend Min Yoongi. He asks you if you have time to meet him today, and after some thinking you tell Jaehoon you have some work to do for school and that you'll meet him during the weekend.

‘Sure,’ he says, ‘I actually have something planned for us.’

‘Oh?’ You raise your eyebrows.

‘Yeah, I’ve been wanting to go to that place for a while now and I thought we could go there together.’

‘Cool,’ you  answer, not bothering to ask where the mentioned place is, ‘See you then on Saturday?’ You ask, pushing to your feet and grabbing your backpack.

‘Yes,’ he stands up too, ‘Saturday is good for me.’

After hugging him you leave him there to finish his tea.

The day you got the envelope with his name inside of it was the first day of your school year at the university, two months after filling out the test. You didn’t recognize his name nor the other information about him that was printed in the letter. He went to a different school than you, lived 20 miles away from you and you probably hadn’t seen him anywhere until the 17th of September – the day you both had some free time to meet for the first time.

.

When you arrive at the park he's already sitting on a bench, the one you both call our bench because hands down it's the best spot in the park; you find the view of the maple trees, a few paths and a pond so comforting. He's leaning forward, with his elbows on his knees, a leather jacket in his hands. You notice he's wearing those new white sneakers that you advised him to buy, black jeans and white t-shirt. He turns to your direction and when your eyes meet he lifts his hand to wave.

‘Hey!’ He greets you and you plop onto the bench next to him, ‘Did you come here right after classes?’ Clearly, he noticed your backpack full of notebooks that you carried not only to the cafe but now to the park too.

‘I was at uni longer than usual, but no, I met with Jaehoon before coming here.’

He gasps dramatically, which makes you roll your eyes. ‘Did I interrupt your date? I didn’t mean to’, he pouts.

‘Stop it,’ you chuckle.

The thing is, you don’t refer the hanging outs with Jaehoon as dates, because it sure doesn’t feel like they are, at least yet, and Yoongi is well aware of that. That’s why he teases you about it and that’s why you really want to slap that cheeky smile off his face right now.

‘Speaking of which,’ you begin, ‘Did you meet her today?’

‘Yup,’ he says.

‘So? How was she?’ You asked, impatient. Yoongi got his letter a few days before you but since his soulmate was out of country doing some volunteering work they communicated only through the internet. He was finally supposed to meet her today and you’re certain he was nervous about it, though he never showed it. The fact she was volunteering for so long made you wonder how she’s the right fit for him, but maybe that’s the whole point – maybe she’s the one who can bring out Yoongi’s soft and loving side of him that he barely shows to anyone, although he certainly has one, you think.

‘She’s cute,’ he shrugs.

‘Cuter than meee?’ you look up at him with puppy eyes and he snorts turning his gaze away.

‘Not annoying as you, that’s for sure,’ he states nonchalantly.

‘What? I’m not annoying!’ You exclaim, indignant.

He turns to you again and says calmly, ‘Yes, you are.’

‘Am not. If anyone’s annoying here, that’s you, my friend.’

He chuckles softly. ‘Anyway, wanna feed the ducks?’

Yeah, right. You’re not going to let him change the subject just yet.

‘Wait! I need to know at least something about her.  After all, you’re going to spend the rest of your lives together.’

He frowns at that, ‘I only just met her.’

‘Well, she’s your soulmate.’

‘I know, it’s just… I don’t know,’ Yoongi shrugs, his gaze focused down at his feet. ‘It’s kind of weird meeting a person for the first time, already knowing you’re destined to be together.’

‘Hm, I think it’s romantic.’

He scoffs. ‘Well, if you really wanna know – it was awkward, really fucking awkward.’

‘Oh. I mean, I’m sure you’ll get past that. Y’know, once you’re in love.’

He turns to you again, brow raised in a way that looks almost mocking. ‘Are you in love?’

You avert your gaze, and your thoughts. ‘Did you bring any bread?’ You casually ask.

‘What? Oh, yeah, I did.’

Grateful that he’s not questioning you anymore, you push to your feet. ‘Okay, I’m sure they’re hungry!’

You don’t bother waiting for him; you stroll to the pond while he grabs the piece of bread from where it was sitting beside him the whole time and follows you behind.

To be honest, it’s  such a simple view—some maple trees, a pond reflecting them and the sky—but if someone asked you, you’d say it’s postcard worthy. The light wind ruffles your hair by running its ghostly fingers through it and you have to brush them off your face to find the ducks quickly coming your way. Yoongi rips the bread apart and extends his hand with a piece of it towards you.

‘You know, we shouldn’t be feeding them anymore,’ you tell him grasping the piece of bread, ‘Since it’s already late spring and they can find food for themselves.’

‘But look how happy they are.’

You spend about fifteen minutes chatting, ripping the bread into tiny pieces and tossing them to the ducks until the wind feels quite chilly against your skin, and Yoongi walks you home as usual, demanding to carry your backpack and you let him, realizing how tense the muscles of your shoulders are, not only from carrying the full backpack but also from stressing about the upcoming exams.

Yoongi transferred to your high school a few years ago, for he moved with his parents to the same street you’ve been living your whole life in. He was one grade above you; you first noticed him at the photography club after classes. You barely talked to each other. Just polite hellos and goodbyes and a few sentences regarding photography stuff were exchanged casually between you two. This changed during one afternoon after classes. His shy question of going home? surprised you, but he seemed like a truly nice person so you didn’t mind him walking home with you. Next thing you knew you were walking home with him quite often, whenever your classes ended at the same time; you were doing photography projects together, too, hanging out with him at coffee shops and his house or yours, helping each other out with homework.

.

On Saturday at 1 pm you step into the bus behind Jaehoon. He buys two tickets for you two before sauntering to the seats situated almost at the back of the bus.

‘Is here alright?’ He questions gesturing to the seats. You nod and he motions you to take a seat near the window.

As the sun beams through the windows you stare at the buildings so familiar to you —the bakery which you thought would be out of business by now, because the quality of the baked goods was lower than average and the prices were higher than they should have been; your kindergarten and then the supermarket just before the sign that lets you know you’re crossing the border line of your city.

The view of the buildings are replaced with fields and forests and you rest your elbow beneath the window,  placing your cheek in your palm, shifting your body to sit as comfortably as possible.

There’s a fly on the window, wandering around on its tiny feet. Does it know where it got itself into? Does it know where the bus is going? Just a few seconds, just a wrong turn and it ended up here, away from home, lost and alone, without any luggage or a map. Will it find a way out, when the bus stops? Will it just die he-

‘___,’ Jaehoon pokes your arm and asks softly, ‘Do you hear me?’

You lift your head to face him, ‘Um, I’m sorry, what did you say?’

‘Well, I was just asking you about your exams.’

‘Oh.’

‘How many of them do you have?’

‘Five,’ you sigh.

‘Ugh, that sucks.’

‘Tell me about it.’

‘Well I hope I can help you get your mind of off that, just for a day at least.’

He does help you, more or less. You stroll around the amusement park that you’ve visited a few times when you were a kid, except now it’s abandoned and looks nothing like it used to. It still looks pretty cool, though. The old buildings and insane rides standing as if they could still be used for fun, but the lack of people and gleeful screams made the mood  rather creepy, reminding you of those apocalypse movies. You take some pictures, you talk about school and friends, books and movies, and then you come back to the bus station.

It’s around 5 o’clock, when you both step out of the bus.

‘Ahh,’ he stretches his muscles. ‘It was fun, right?’

‘Yeah,’ you smile, fixing bag on your shoulder, ‘It was.’

He looks around attentively and spots a car, which, you suppose, is waiting for him. ‘I have to go somewhere. You’ll come back on your own, right?’

‘Sure.’

He wraps his arms around you, hugging you goodbye.

You don’t love him.

He looks into your eyes and says, ‘Text me when you get home.’

You nod and smile at him, ‘I will.’

He turns around and rushes across the street where his—you’re guessing—friend is waiting in a car.

You take a bus home.

You don’t love him.

It’s been already 8 months of you getting to know him and… nothing. You keep telling yourself to be patient – not every couple fall for each other at the first sight, but…

His smile has the same effect on you as a smile of any stranger. And oh how mad you are at yourself of thinking like that but if you’re being honest you just can’t help it. You are more than well aware that he doesn’t make your heart flutter.

You should feel something when you get a text from him, you should feel your heart swell when he compliments you, you should have felt something when he reached out his hand to gently place it over yours just a few days ago at the café.

He’s your soulmate.

But you don’t love him.

You tell yourself that everyone has a different story and that’s okay, because the ending is the same – it’s a happy ending.

So, you wait. It’s all you have and it’s all you can do for now.

.

‘Oh hey, you’re back.’

You’re greeted by your father sprawled on one of the couches in the living room, your mother and younger sister sitting comfortably on the other, all of their eyes focused on the TV.

‘How did it go? Did you have fun?’ Your mother asks curiously.

‘Yeah, it was alright,’ you shrug and plop onto the sofa right beside her.

‘Are you tired? Hungry?’ She questions softly and whether it’s because of how close she is or it’s because you never really paid attention to it but you notice now how her age is reflecting on her skinny body.  You can see some wrinkles, some white hairs that she probably missed whilst dyeing her own hair, and her eyes aren’t as bright as they used to be.

‘Just thirsty,’ you answer.

‘I’ll get you some water,’ she says, already leaping to her feet.

‘I can get it myself,’ you remind her kindly.

‘It’s okay, I was about to go to the kitchen anyway.’

There’s some kind of show about healthy food or something on the TV. You hear your sister sigh beside you on the couch, ‘I’m so jealous of you.’

That only makes you furrow your eyebrows at her, ‘Jealous? Of what exactly?’

Those fucking exams that makes me want to run away to some kind of a desert island? Or maybe –

‘Of finally knowing your soulmate,’ she says dreamily.

Oh, the man that has you wondering what’s wrong with you if you can’t figure out how to fall in love with him.

‘There’s nothing to be jealous of, really.’

‘Are you joking?’ She exclaims in disbelief, ‘It’s so exciting, and wonderful and just ah, I can’t wait till I meet mine,’ she grins and she actually looks cute. You used to be like that, too, when you were 14.

Your father chuckles, ‘You still got some time until that, my dear, you should focus on other things for now.’

‘Ugh,’ she frowns at your father’s words, ‘That’s exactly what ___ did, and,’ she shakes her head in what looks like disappointment, ‘Look at her now—so serious and grumpy all the time, even after meeting Jaehoon.’

There is some truth in her words. But you’re not sure if being grumpy has to do with focusing on other things than your soulmate, or the fact that all the dreams you had as a kid doesn’t seem to be coming true.

Your mother comes back to the living room and hands you a glass filled with water.

‘Ugh, I just want to be in love,’ your sister mumbles getting up from the couch.

.

You plop onto your bed and for a moment, just for a brief moment, you feel at ease. Your muscles relax into the soft sheets and your pillow drinks all of your worries from the farthest corners of your mind.

But it doesn’t take long for them to come back. They sneak up on you, and that overwhelming sensation settles itself softly, suffocatingly over you like a heavy fog.

Jaehoon. All you can think about is Jaehoon. However, not in a way your parents, your sister or you would like you to think about him. You’re not thinking about how fun the trip was or how much you’re looking forward to seeing him again. No. Lately, you’ve been wondering how he is feeling about you, how he sees you and what is on his mind when you’re together. Will he ever be able to love you? Or maybe he’s already in love with you? How do you find out that kind of thing? Both of you act like friends, and, while it’s not bad (you like him, he’s not boring and sometimes he really has some interesting and clever things to say) how is this relationship different from any other that you’ve ever had? It isn’t. And that’s making you worry.

All of these thoughts make your head hurt and the only thing that could help to clear your mind seems to be going for a walk. You swipe the screen of your phone to unlock it and stare at it for a few moments before shaking your head and locking the phone again. Yoongi’s busy, you think to yourself. He’s probably with his soulmate right now, most likely with her.

Either way, there’s no need to disturb him with your problems. Not that you can actually talk to him about it anyway.

You can stroll the city by your own, and probably that might be even better.

A t-shirt, black jeans and a pair of sneakers should be good. A hoodie in your hand and your phone in your pocket. You don’t even take your earphones; the songs of birds might just be enough to calm you.

You walk and walk and walk. Not really paying attention to directions or places, or anything at all. Your mind is a mess and you only hope that the fresh air around you would clear it out. But, honestly, when was it able to do that?

You need a distraction and you know just the guy who is basically always able to distract you.

Nobody’s going to get hurt by you asking him what he’s up to, right? And so you text him.

8.02 pm To Yoongi: are you busy?

8.03 pm From Yoongi: no, why?

8.03 pm To Yoongi: wanna go for a walk?

8.04 pm From Yoongi: sure

You immediately send him your location so he wouldn’t go towards your house like per usual.

And after a while you recognize the boy with a pair of black sweatpants, a hoodie and a snapback on his head walking towards you on the sidewalk, and when he notices you, a hand rises to gently wave at you. The gesture immediately earns a grin from you. A few steps forward and you hear a curious what where you doing here?

'Just strolling the streets,' you answer with a shrug.

'Weren't you on some kind of trip with Jaehoon today?' He questions as you both head toward the same direction.

'I was.'

'Sooo, why are you strolling the streets alone?'

'Well, I'm back now,’ You point out the obvious. ‘Can't I just walk around my neighbourhood if I want to?' You can hear the irritation in your own voice and you wish you could take that back, because, the thing is, you really don't ever walk around alone, it's just not your thing and the direction you came from isn't really your neighbourhood and usually you would think twice about going through those tiny questionable streets there. So of course he knows that something might be up.

'Okay, yeah, you certainly can, but…' he trails off, then his voice goes low but soft and sort of soothing, 'Did something happen?'

Did something happen? Not really. Maybe that's the whole point.

'No,' you gather yourself up and manage a casual smile, 'Everything's fine.'

He doesn't question you more about it and even if you’re feeling appreciative,  a part of you wishes he would. A part of you wants to talk to him, to tell him about how lost you feel and how everything you were waiting for and everything that you believed in is now crashing down and breaking into pieces, just like that huge vase made of glass that you accidentally pushed from the counter when you were eight.

But you keep it all to yourself.

As you keep strolling side by side, he tells you about his dog choking on a bone and how scary it actually was to see him struggle like that. He mentions he got some inspiration to write music again, which is cool, because he’ll finally be able to show his professor he’s worthy of being at this course, although, you’re certain he doesn’t need any professor telling him what to do or what worth his music has, he’s just that good at creating music (at least judging from the melodies he’s composed and gifted to you on your birthday).

He also tells you the release date of a movie that you are so excited about. ‘It’s two weeks after your final exam, right? We should go see it,' he suggests, 'It would be like a celebration after your exams, y’know,' He softly laughs and you do the same in reply.

As the sun gets closer and closer to the horizon you two get closer to your house and you know it will soon come into the view.

He clears his throat, ‘So, you're sure you don't want to stay at my house tomorrow night?’

That reminds you—your family is going out of city, but you have exams and you have to feed your cat and of course you're staying home alone. 

‘Yeah, I'm pretty sure,’ you nod. It'll be actually the first time of you staying home alone for the whole night. You've stayed a few times at Yoongi's before in high school, but you're an adult now and you'll surely manage.

‘But what if something happens?’ He questions.

'Um, and what could possibly happen that I couldn't handle?’

‘I dunno, an intruder comes to your house?’ He shrugs, his voice casual as though he didn’t just mention one of your biggest fears. The thought alone makes your skin crawl. But Yoongi hasn’t finished yet, he continues with the possibilities. ‘Or you trip over that step in your house like always, and crack your head open and there's nobody to take care of you, like take you to the hospital and stuff.’

His words make you stop in your tracks and you hold your hand up at him, 'Oh my god, can you stop that?' Because all of that doesn't help you to stay calm about staying home alone, like, at all.

He just chuckles glancing at you, 'I'm sorry, ___, but that really could happen.’

You sigh shaking your head, 'Ugh, just shut up, please.’

He starts walking again, ‘Anyway, just let me know if you need anything, yeah?’

You snort at that, ‘I'm sure I'll be just fine.’

‘Yeah, I know you'll be fine,’ he smiles teasingly.

‘Go to hell, Min Yoongi,’ you retort.

‘Already there,’ he admits, shrugging and before you can wonder what he meant by that, he looks around briefly and sighs, 'Isn't this nice? The weather.'

‘Ah, yeah, I guess so.’

It is actually quite nice. The weather.

The few sounds that can be heard are made by cars that are passing by from time to time (the street you live in is one of those streets where you can see more kids with their bikes than cars), the shuffling of the trees and the soft tapping of shoes against the sidewalk. Yours and Yoongi's. Oh how you wish you could stroll the streets just for another hour or two, but—

‘Here we are,’ he observes as you reach the narrow path that snakes to your front door, ‘Don't die tomorrow,’ he laughs, and you groan.

‘I won't,’ you reassure through gritted teeth, ‘And, by the way, I’ll probably be studying the whole night anyway.’

‘Oh, right,’ he nods thoughtfully. ‘Good luck with that.’

He focuses his gaze behind you at the car that's coming your way and it's bright lights illuminate his fair skin and he looks… charming. Eventually he squints his eyes because why the fuck they are using high beams.

With his head low so his snapback can shield him from the brightness he waits until the car goes by past you two.

‘Okay,’ says Yoongi as he returns his eyes on yours. ‘I'll go now.’

‘Okay,’ you answer him, noticing him slipping his hands into the pockets of his sweats. The way he’s just standing there and grinning at you makes you question, ‘What?’

He answers with a shake of his head and a nothing. He sighs, ‘Bye.’

‘Bye,’ you echo him, still a little confused.

‘Bye,’ he repeats, making you chuckle.

You motion with your hand towards the end of the street where his house is like two minutes away, ‘Byeee,’ you drawl.

He lets out a low laugh and begins his way backwards glancing at his feet and then at you again.

You feel a nice warmth spreading across your cheeks, and your smile probably looks really silly right now. You feel somewhat flustered as Yoongi turns around, and did he notice that?

Not that you would care, anyway.

He leaves you standing there with this peculiar feeling in your belly that you merely pay attention to. He helped you to take your mind off things that bothered you and that's what's important, you realize as you walk towards your house.

.

You gulp the last sip of coffee from your mug and your eyes roam around the desk that you're seated behind. Books, notebooks, pens are scattered across it, and you sigh checking the time on the clock that hangs on the wall above your bed. It's already seven minutes after midnight but the coffee might keep you up for another two hours or so and that time can be spent sufficiently by studying. So you stretch your tense muscles, exhale deeply and prepare mentally to keep on studying.

Just as you start writing down some notes you hear thunder. A fucking thunder, and you're home alone. Absolutely perfect.

It didn't come as a huge surprise, though, as the clouds were looking exceptionally threatening since around eight o'clock this evening.

The dark blue and grey and slightly pink clouds can actually be freaking beautiful and the lightening cutting through them just adds some magic to that admirable view, but, the thing is, it's midnight and you're home alone. The lightening which illuminates your room to the fullest every twenty seconds and the loud rumble that comes after that is fucking terrifying.

You could try, of course, to keep on writing notes and reading the stuff from your notebooks that you wrote during classes, but as you feel your heart thumping rapidly against its cage you just feel it is time to forget the studying and get under the sheets and pray to whatever gods people all over the world believe in that it would end soon.

Good thing you're already in your comfy pyjamas so all you have to do is reach the wall a few steps away, switch off the light, flinch when the whole room gets illuminated by the lightening and run to your bed as the sound of thunder makes your whole body tense up.

The silky soft sheets give you as much comfort as they possibly can in this kind of situation as your heart keeps pounding like crazy. At this point it seems the thunderstorm is at its peak and you wonder what could you possibly have done so horrible to the mother nature that made her so angry. Why is she shouting and growling at you like that, causing your whole house to quake?

You nearly jump out of your bed at the sharp and high pitched sound followed by another one that you recognize as the tone of the notifications of your phone. Then and only then do you realize you left your phone hidden somewhere under those books on your desk.

Awesome, just awesome.

You groan in frustration, but it's probably just some random notifications that are definitely not worth of you getting out your bed and stroll across your room in the dark (the room is not that dark, actually; and the darkness would mean the forgiveness of the mother nature, but her angry eyes keep on flashing, so, no, you don't want to get out of the sheets and come face to face with her).

You would leave the phone buried under those notebooks and what not, at least until the storm ends, but there's just one thought that keeps on coming back—it might be your parents or your sister checking up on you and you surely don't want to hear their complaints about you not answering them . So, unfortunately, you have to roll out of your bed, hurry to the desk, dig for the phone and scurry back to curl up again in your safe and cosy bed. So you do just that and when you're calmed down enough to think properly, you unlock your phone under the sheets only to see Yoongi's name on the screen.

12:49 am From Yoongi: Yoi okay?

12:49 am From Yoongi: You*

You'd giggle at his concern if only you weren't so damn petrified. You try to think of what to text him back for a while. You do not want to confess that you're not okay, of course.

12:54 am To Yoongi: I'm fine

It takes a few flashes of lightening for you to get another message.

12:55 am From Yoongi: Did you lock the doors and everything?

Damn it.

Okay, okay, calm down. Your parents probably locked the front door when they left. Of course, they did—you had to unlock the doors to take the trash out an hour or so after they left the house, but... did you lock the door  when you stepped inside? As hard as you try to remember yourself locking that damn door, you can't. And the thought of being home alone at night with the front door unlocked has your heart sinking.

You groan realizing there's no other way to be sure you're safe than to physically go and check the door. Another rumbling of thunder reaches your eardrums as you quickly type in another text message. Your finger lingers for a few moments before pressing send.

12:58 am To Yoongi: Are you busy? Can I call you?

You sit up on your bed waiting for his answer, but for your surprise he doesn't even bother texting you to call him —he's calling you.

‘Hey,’ you breath out once you have your phone pressed to your ear.

‘Hey, what's up?’ he asks, voice seemingly tinged with worry.

‘Um, I was just studying, y'know,’ you begin as calmly as you can manage, ‘And I, uh, I got tired and I'm just resting now,’ he doesn't need to know that you wanted to call him just because you'd feel braver to go check the door having him on the phone.

Yoongi hums as if encouraging you to continue, expecting to hear a sincere reason of you wanting to talk to him. You won’t let him know that, instead, you ask, ‘Anyway, what are you up to?’

You get up from your bed and start your way across the room towards the hallway. You need to reach the staircase.

‘Well, I was trying to finish this beat that I’m working on, but I heard the thunder even with my headphones on—

‘Oh, really?’ You murmur, feigning slight surprise, as you peek your head through the opened door and look around the hallway as if to make sure you're really home alone.

‘Yeah, I thought of you. I mean you're scared of thunder, right?’ You listen to his husky voice that is even lower now than usual because of how long he was working on that beat, late at night, not talking, ‘And you're alone so I thought I would check up on you.’

You walk down the stairs. You can do this. Just a few meters separate you and the front door. But your heart keeps thumping against your chest and another loud thunder makes you shudder and hold your breath.

‘You said you’re fine. Are you, though?’

You inhale and try to sound as casual as possible, ‘Yeah, yeah, I'm totally fine,’ You say as you finally raise your hand to the handle of the front door, and you sigh in relief when you’re convinced it’s locked, ‘Everything’s just fi- oh my, fuck!’ You gasp when another thunder causes your house to shake, you can't help the reaction—the rumbling is so loud and horrifying.

A chuckle trickles through your phone, ‘Yeah, I thought so.’

‘Don't make fun of me, Min Yoongi,’ you mutter bitterly.

‘I’m not,’ he exclaims, then adds in a smaller voice, ‘Well, maybe a little.’

You groan at that and then slowly stroll around the house, tentatively peeking into the rooms to check if all of the windows are closed. He stays silent for a while so you lower your phone to see if the call has ended but it hasn’t and, ‘Yoongi?’ you murmur when the phone is back to your ear.

‘Do you want me to come over?’ He questions and you stop in your tracks, ‘We could watch a movie or, I don't know, we could do anything, really. Till the storm stops?’

You contemplate for a few moments. Studying got interrupted by the thunder and you highly doubt you’re going to continue that, and having another person—your best friend—in your house sounds like a good idea right now, when your legs feel shaky and weak because of the fear.

‘Okay,’ you agree in a soft tone.

‘Okay?’ You can hear he's slightly surprised.

‘Yeah, I mean I'm kinda hungry, so I can prepare us some instant noodles, if you’d like.’

‘Sounds good to me,’ answers Yoongi. He tells you he'll be there in five.

As soon as you're done preparing the noodles, that same sound from earlier lets you know you got a message.

01:12 am From Yoongi: Almost there.

Clearly, he doesn’t want to startle you with the doorbell. He’s always so considerate. Well, most of the time. Sometimes he’s  a ridiculously annoying little shit.

You let him in and lock the door after he’s inside. He carefully hangs his umbrella on the hook.

‘Cute pyjamas,’ he grins at you, standing in the hallway. He’s wearing the same sweats from yesterday and a sweater with long-ass sleeves. The boy looks rather adorable.

‘Thanks,’ you let out a laugh, turning on your heel to walk to the kitchen. Yoongi follows behind.

‘Here you go,’ you slide the noodles to his side of the table when you both are seated in front of each other.

His thanks is followed by your ugh, shit caused by yet another heavy rumbling.

He giggles, and you frown, ‘Fuck you.’

‘Tsk tsk tsk,’ he shakes his head, ‘I dropped everything I was doing to come here to help you through this thunderstorm, and that's how you treat me?’

‘Hey, I prepared you noodles,’ you tilt your head toward the cup in front of him.

Yoongi narrows his eyes at you as if thinking whether he should counter you with another argument. ‘You're lucky I'm hungry,’ he eventually mumbles and grasps his chopsticks.

 ‘So how’s the studying going?’ he asks halfway through the meal.

‘It’s going okay. How’s your dog doing?’

‘He’s fine. No more bones for him, though. That’s for sure.’

You both giggle, and when you’re done eating you suggest watching a movie.

You run upstairs to your room to get the laptop and when you go down he’s already comfortably sitting on the couch, watching you enter the living room and place the laptop on the table in front of him.

‘What should we watch?’ You ask making yourself comfy on the couch next to him, tucking your feet beneath your thighs.

‘Some kind of comedy?’

And so you find some kind of comedy and let it play, leaning back into the couch.

The thunderstorm hasn’t calmed down yet, and the flinching is like a habit of yours at this point. You fail to avoid  muttering fuck or shit here and there, too.

Just a few minutes pass, and you feel the weight on the couch beside you shift; you hear Yoongi’s low and almost bored come here. He holds out his arm for you.

Knowing how much you feel calmer and safer just by having him around you, you can’t help but wonder what it would feel like to be even closer to him, to be in his arms and to feel his body warmth. You wince. Where did those thoughts come from?

The shake of your head is almost imperceptible.

‘I don’t bite.’

The way his arm is spread out just for you seems so welcoming, so you give in, moving closer to him and he lets his arm fall around your waist, making you snuggle into the comfort that his warm body is providing you.

.

A loud rumbling snaps you out of your slumber and as you blink tiredly, still pressed into Yoongi and subconsciously hugging his body, you feel his other hand, that isn’t on your waist, stroke your head, gently caressing your scalp. The way you're leaning into him allows you to feel his steady breathing, his chest rising and falling evenly, going up and down. With that kind of  tranquillity and warmth, with the sounds of the movie still playing in the background and the storm letting itself to be known by the constant music it’s playing on your windows, it all feels so… right. 

You tilt your head up to glance at Yoongi, making him draw his attention from screen of the laptop to you. His fingers tenderly brush a strand of your hair from your face as you blink at him. He keeps his hand on your cheek, stroking it affectionately with his thumb as his eyes are locked with yours. The ghost of a smile flickers on Yoongi's lips, and you mirror him by letting a smile twitch the corners of your own.

And his gaze falls. To your lips.

The look in his eyes changes just like that, he suddenly looks somewhat serious and you can’t quite figure out his expression or mood. Only when his eyes travel back to yours, you notice the spark in his dark orbs, and the rush of warmth takes over your body.

You've seen it before.

The sparks are spine-tingling and awfully compelling.

.

‘So, you're finally eighteen,’ he’d said that night.

You smiled, ‘Yup, finally.’

‘You still look like a child, though,’ he dead-panned.

‘I do not,’ you disagreed indignantly.

He laughed as a few of your friends from school argued about something insignificant a few meters away from you two. Apparently one of them didn’t want to go to the food place you usually go to, and the other two were insisting to go there because it’s her day today, so you let them figure it out between them. The truth is, you couldn’t care less were to eat, but according to your friends you’re just saying that; it has to be perfect.

‘How do you feel?’ He wondered, ‘Do you feel different?’

‘Not really. Should I be feeling different?’

He shrugged. ‘Do you understand more about the world now?’ He just seemed to really like teasing you.

‘Oh yeah, all the secrets of the world that are revealed when you turn eighteen has been unveiled to me.’

He chuckled, ‘Speaking of birthdays, check the pocket,’ He nodded towards the jacket you were wearing.

‘There's nothing there,’ you observed, checking every corner of the right pocket, ‘It's empty.’

‘It is? Check the other one then.’

You found something familiar in the left one, ‘Your phone?’

‘No, wait, there's nothing more?’ He reached forward and checked the pockets himself, then frowned.

‘What are you looking for?’

He didn’t answer, just unzipped the jacket and flung it open, ‘Ugh, where did I put that thing…’ he murmured checking the inside pocket, too.

‘What thing?’

‘Oh, here it is,’ he sighed in relief.

‘What is?’ You kept on insisting.

‘Give me your hand,’ he said, holding something tightly in his fist. You held your hand out and he put his other palm under it as if giving it some support. His skin was cold.

‘Do you want your jacket back?’ You asked.

He looked at you baffled while placing his fist onto your palm.

‘Your hands are really cold,’ you explained.

‘Don't worry about it,’ he dismissed and let the thing fall to your palm by opening his.

You looked down at it, ‘A USB?’

‘As you can see,’ he gently moved his fingers to make your hand form a ball with the flash drive inside.

‘Is there something in it?’ You wondered. He kept his hands on your fist.

‘You'll see,’ he grinned.

‘Hey, don't be weird, tell me.’

‘Your hand is warm.’

‘I told you you're cold, you should—

‘Let's keep them that way,’ he jerked his hands away, only to grab the zipper again but pulling it upwards this time, one of his hands coming towards your chin and tilting it up.

‘You’re gonna freeze to death,’ you stated.

‘You look good in my jacket.’

‘Oh do I?’

‘Mm-hmm,’ he nodded with a pleased tilt to his lips.

‘We’re going to McDonalds,’ one of your friends shouted. ‘You guys coming?’

‘We’ll be right behind you,’ Yoongi shouted back. ‘Anyway,’ he turned to you, ‘Since you don’t like receiving dying flowers, or any other gifts for that matter, this is, um,’ he glanced at your hand with the USB, ‘Well, you’ll see.’

‘You’re such a cliffhanger, Min Yoongi.’

His lips curved upwards and he reached to pull you into a hug. ‘Happy birthday,’ he murmured, and when he pulled back slightly, his hands still remaining on your waist and his face mere centimetres away from yours, he let you see those sparks in his eyes.

And perhaps it was always there, but you had to get close enough in order to be able to notice it.

‘Guys!’

.

You lift your head up slowly as his gaze entrances you, and if you paid attention you might have felt the way his hand moved a little bit further from your cheek, towards your ear as if trying to lure you in even more.

It doesn’t even last a few seconds before the thunder roars and distracts you fully, startling you. It slaps you back to reality, to the reality where every single thing that you were thinking and doing just now truly isn’t appropriate.

So you straighten yourself, looking away, and Yoongi drops his hand from your face as you feel your heart hammering even in your eardrums, and you’re not certain what exactly caused it—the thunder or your friend Yoongi. Maybe both.

He lets his other hand linger on the small of your back for a few fleeting moments as you shift on the couch, before it falls completely and he rests it on his thigh.

You clear your throat, ‘How much of the movie did I miss?’

‘Uh…’ He sniffs almost inaudibly and rubs at his nose, ‘I think you zoned out like ten minutes ago.’

part 2

#min yoongi #bts #kwriterskollection #bangtan #yoongi fluff #yoongi angst #bts soulmate au #bestfriend yoongi #bts fanfiction #yoongi soulmate au #kyut-tea #fanfic #tdsotm

[dragon-moms]

Entry 177 - Merry

Dear Diary,

Today was a good day!

Clementine couldn’t stay the whole time, though.

“I’m supposed to meet Tyrion for dinner, and fill him in on things,” Clementine said, tail swishing a little nervously at the door. “I probably won’t tell him everything, for your safety and all, but he at least needs to know the Egg is back with Mom…”

“That is quite alright. We understand,” Myrmidon said.

“Yeah!” I said. “We’re just glad we got to see you again, you know?”

Clementine nodded. “I’ll visit again next time I have a day off.”

“Hey, Clemmy,” Flare said. He’d been keeping his distance since the whole thing the other day… I didn’t know if that was the right move or not, Diary, but maybe space is useful? Some time to think?

“Yeah?” Clementine said, turning to look at him.

Flare immediately looked like he lost what he wanted to say. He reached for the little symbol on his chest, but then stopped himself. “We should talk some time, probably. Like, brother-talk and stuff,” he said.

“...probably so,” Clementine said.

“So let’s do that when we can… and… I’m sorry… and I hope I can make it up to you.”

Clementine smiled a little. “Pretty genuine for once.”

“What! I’m always genuine!” Flare said.

Clementine chuckled. “Yeah, we’ll talk soon, if you want. Take care, okay?”

“Yeah!” Flare said, smiling.

Clementine left, and Flare nodded to himself, clearly pleased.

“It seems like Flare has taken appropriate measures,” Myrmidon said, smiling. “I do hope my council was helpful.”

“Oh, I’m sure it was!” I said, smiling. “You’re really good like that, you know?”

“I am glad you think so, my sweetest…” they said.

We spent some time reading to the Eggs, and then we made dinner! It was a very relaxing, honestly, Diary… besides the cramped space, I’m getting used to being here… I don’t know if that’s good or bad… I was comfortable back before they started searching for Philly too, and that didn’t turn out too well… but I’m going to do my best to relax, all the same! Gloria and Nobody and Maude are doing stuff to help, right? I can trust them. And I need to be ready when it’s my turn to do something again! Right, Diary?

As Myrmidon and I were finishing up dinner, I heard someone open the door. There were no sound of wings, so I jumped a little.

“Ah, I do believe that’s Coral,” Myrmidon said, adjusting the Egg in their grip as both it and Gloria’s Egg glowed happily. “She said she should be done sorting her haul around dinnertime.”

“Right!” I said. “I sort of forgot she got home…” I said. Coral had kind of snuck in, ate some leftovers I saved for her, and slept yesterday! We hadn’t really gotten to talk to her! Then again, maybe she just wanted private time with Maude, after being away for awhile… it seems like she has a hard job, Diary.

“Well, perhaps that should be a goal of dinner today, to get to know her better,” Myrmidon said. “I believe Maude said she would be late getting home once more.”

“Oh yeah, maybe!” I said. “I honestly don’t know that much about her… or Maude, really, besides that she’s, like… Gloria’s really good friend?”

“I believe they are lovers, my sweetest,” Myrmidon said.

“Oh, yeah, I guess so…” I said, thinking about it while I stoked the fire a little hotter.

“Something smells good!” Coral said. “Ya’ll seem to have taken over Maude’s kitchen quite effectively.”

“Hi Coral!” I said, smiling. “I hope that’s okay? We’re just trying to be useful.”

“No complaints here,” Coral said. “Especially when Maude’s going to be late again… I never really got the hang of cooking with fire and all that once I moved up here with her.” She laughed and slapped me on the back with a fin. “Way easier just to gut the fish and whatnot than all this!”

“I-I don’t know about all that…” I said. “There’s a lot of little tricks there, you know? I’m not very good at Blue-style dishes…”

“Eh, you’re probably right, but I wasn’t any good at that either,” Coral said, chuckling. “Anyway, you girls have fun, I’m going to get off my fins for a bit and relax. Looking forward to eating whatever that is, though.”

“Ah, I am a girl, now?” Myrmidon asked me as Coral disappeared out of the kitchen and down into the underwater part of the place.

“Well, I mean, you’re a Mom now…” I said. “But I guess that doesn’t make you a girl?”

“No, I do not believe so. Not just a girl,” Myrmidon said, and then quietly, more to theirself, than anything. “And you are okay with that, of course.”

“How could I not be okay with such a caring cutie, you know?” I asked.

Myrmidon chuckled and smiled. “Yes, of course, my sweetest.”

“We should talk to her, maybe?”

“Yes, let’s, when we can get some time alone,” Myrmidon said.

At dinner, Nobody ate quickly, like usual. “It’s really good,” she said. “But I have to go. I’m working on a route so you can talk to the Queen.”

“Me?” I asked.

“Yeah,” Nobody said. “I mean, it’s your Egg, and you’re the one that got everyone into this mess,” she said.

“Merry was simply doing what was right,” Myrmidon said.

“Yeah, I know,” Nobody said. “I’m on your fucking side at this point, remember? But still, you’ve got to talk to her.”

“Not alone,” Myrmidon said. “We will all go.”

“We’ll all be there, Merry,” Gloria said. “Well, maybe not Coral.”

Coral chuckled. “I mean, you never know! But I do have another haul coming up in a few days, so it might be up to ya’ll.”

“You’re doing plenty letting us stay here,” Gloria said.

“Glad you think so,” Coral said, taking another bite, smiling.

“Nobody, can I come tonight?” Flare asked.

“No,” Nobody said.

“But you took Mommy the other day!”

“No,” she repeated.

“You’re going to need me, before the end,” Flare said. “And I mean, I’m the hero! I should be doing the dangerous stuff.”

Nobody sighed. “What, your god or whatever told you that? That I’d need you?”

Flare nodded happily.

Nobody took a breath. “Tomorrow. I got stuff I can still get done tonight. But if you’re sure and you’ll not blow my cover, we’ll go take a look at it and see what your god has to say.”

“Really!” Flare said, excited.

“Well, I mean, you got them all into the Queen’s chambers last time,” Nobody said.

Flare rushed over and gave her a hug.

“Nope! Nevermind!” Nobody called and extracted herself. “I’m leaving!”

“I’ll be ready for tomorrow!” Flare said, still excited.

“Nope!” Nobody said, and hurried outside.

Flare sat back down, grinning widely.

Soon, we’d finished eating, and Gloria had taken both Eggs, saying she needed to spend more time with hers and she might as well watch both if she was watching! So once Myrmidon and I had finished washing the dishes, I wasn’t really sure what to do!

Coral had settled down, reading a book. Myrmidon gave me a look that suggested we should have our chat that we talked about earlier. So we went over to her.

“Hi, Coral,” I said, smiling.

“Hey, what’s happening?” she said, smiling over the top of the book.

“What are you reading?” I asked, looking at the cover. The title was “Eight Hundred Years of Innovation: An Autobiography.”

“Oh, nothing,” Coral said. “Just about this jerk who took over the Magic-Workers Union and changed all the rules to mess people up. Must admit I’m hate-reading it. He thinks he’s so clever.” She chuckled.

“Do you read a lot of books, Coral?” Myrmidon asked.

“Oh, sure,” Coral said. “I mean, you fall in love with an archivist you get books thrown at you all the time.” She laughed. “You would not believe how many months it took of Maude shoving books into my fins before she figured out my tastes, but hey.”

“Why would you read a book you hate, though?” I asked. That didn’t seem like much fun at all, Diary!

Coral just kind of shrugged and smiled. “Sometimes it’s good to get riled up at those you need to be riled up at, is all.”

“We do not mean to disturb you, but if we could, there is something I feel we need to discuss momentarily,” Myrmidon said.

Coral put the book down. “Shoot.”

“Ah, well, you called me a girl earlier and I am not certain that is particularly accurate,” Myrmidon said.

“That so? Maude said you were using ‘mom’ so I just figured,” Coral said. “Sorry about that. I’ll get it right in the future.”

“It is quite alright,” Myrmidon said, smiling, glad to have it over.

“Been away from the ocean for too long, if I’m thinking in binaries,” Coral said, chuckling. “But yeah, seriously, I make any other mistakes, ya’ll tell me, alright? I know ya’ll are on the run or whatever but there’s no reason for anyone to feel uncomfortable about silly things like that.”

“You’ve never talked to me,” Dagger’s voice said. “That’s uncomfortable.”

Coral jumped and put a fin to her chest. “Geez…”

“Yeah, I’m terrifying…” Dagger’s voice said softly.

“Do not fear, that is simply my sibling, Dagger,” Myrmidon said.

“Maude mentioned something about a ghost,” Coral said. “Uh, hi… nice to meet you, Dagger.”

Dagger appeared next to Coral. “Hi… sorry I was quiet…”

“It’s alright,” Coral said.

“Yeah, I’m sure it’s just fine!” I said. “We know you’re shy, you know?”

“I’m… not...” Dagger started, and then faded a little bit, embarrassed.

“Ey are a really great artist!” I said, smiling. “Ey paint all kinds of stuff!”

Coral laughed. “I was wondering where all these sketches were coming from. There’s a whole stack of them on the shelf now.”

“I get bored…” Dagger said. “Sorry…” Ey disappeared.

“Nothing to apologize for,” Coral said, unsure where to talk now that Dagger was gone. “They’re great stuff.”

“I am sure ey heard you,” Myrmidon said, smiling.

Coral chuckled. “I always felt boring compared to Maude, just hauling stuff this way and that across the ocean, but dang, you all really make me feel that with a vengeance.”

“That’s not true!” I said. “I mean, I’m not interesting at all, you know?”

Coral laughed. “I highly doubt that!”

It was about then that Maude finally got home, looking a bit tired. “Hey, Coral,” she said, smiling softly.

“Hey there,” Coral said, getting up and grinning. “Have to excuse me, a beautiful woman just walked in.”

“Of course,” Myrmidon said, smiling.

Coral seems pretty nice, Diary! I hope I can be better friends with her and Maude once this is all over… if I can convince the Queen...

No, no, I have to believe it’s going to be over, Diary. It’ll all work out! Everyone is working so hard! I have to too!

You believe I can do it, don’t you, Diary?

I think today was a 7, maybe!

Goodnight, Diary!

#dragons #moms #dragonmoms

[salonduthe]

The Tao Te Ching: a modern interpretation of Lao Tzu perpetrated by Ron Hogan copyright 2002, 2004

This work is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs-NonCommercial License.

Basically, you can distribute this text all over the place, as long as you always attribute it to me, you don't change a word, and you never charge anybody anything to receive it. But read the license for the full details.

-----

FOREWORD

"Ancient Chinese Secret, Huh?"

In the spring of 1994, I was handed a master's degree in film studies and politely invited not to return to graduate school in the fall. So I went to work at Dutton's, a fantastic indie bookstore in Brentwood, less than a mile from the Simpson condo, but that's another story. Doug, the owner, lets his employees borrow books from the inventory, on the principle that you can sell books better if you know them better, and that's how I discovered the Tao Te Ching (or TTC, as I'll abbreviate it from now on).

Oh, I knew about the book beforehand. I knew it existed, anyway, and I knew it was a classic of Eastern philosophy. But that's all I knew. Not that there's that much to know after that, about all anybody can really say about Lao Tzu is that according to legend, about six centuries before Christ, he got fed up with the royal court's inability to take his advice and decided to leave. Then, the story goes, he was stopped at the Great Wall by a guard who begged him to write down some of his teachings for posterity, and the result was this slim volume. Once I actually started to read the thing, I was hooked. Here was a book that managed to say with clarity what I'd been struggling to figure out about spirituality for several years.

The TTC I found at Dutton's was written by Stephen Mitchell, a version which remains popular nearly twenty years after its original composition. Having read a couple dozen translations since, it's still one of the most accessible versions I've seen, but even then, I found his style a bit too refined, too full of a certain "wisdom of the ancients" flavor. For example, here's how Mitchell starts the first chapter:

"The Tao that can be named

is not the eternal Tao.

The name that can be named

is not the eternal Name."

At the time, I was newly infatuated with the writing of Quentin Tarantino and David Mamet, so my dream version of a TTC reflected the simplicity and grit of their dialogue:

"If you can talk about it, it ain't Tao.

If it has a name, it's just another thing."

Anyway, I grabbed a couple other translations and started looking at the different ways they expressed the same sentiments--or, as I quickly discovered, how much poetic license Mitchell and other translators were willing to take with the original text. I don't think this necessarily matters all that much; many current English- language versions are by people who don't know Chinese well, if at all, and I can't read or speak it myself. To that extent, then, we're *all* (unless we're fluent in Chinese, that is) at the mercy of, at best, a secondhand understanding of what Lao Tzu said.

Once I thought I had a rough idea what was behind the words, though, I went about rephrasing the chapters in my own voice. My guiding principle was to take out as much of the "poetry" as possible, to make the text sound like dialogue, so the reader could imagine someone telling him or her what Tao's all about. You can't take the "poetry" out completely, because the TTC is always going to have those lines about Tao being an "eternal mystery" and whatnot.

But the beauty of the book isn't in its language, at least not for me--it's in the practical advice Lao Tzu offers us about how to live a productive, meaningful life on a day to day basis. What I wanted to do was to make that advice as clear to a modern American reader as it would have been to the guard who first asked Lao Tzu to write it down.

I worked through the first twenty chapters, then put the rough draft up on my website under a pseudonym I used online back in those days. A bunch of fan mail came in, so I kept plugging away at the text, then my hard drivecollapsed and all my files were completely erased. I was freelancing pretty steadily then, and what little free time I had I spent building my own website, so the TTC went on hold. I got an occasional email asking about the other chapters, and I developed a stock answer. When it was time for me to finish the job, I told people, I would.

Years went by. I'd left LA for San Francisco, then moved up to Seattle, chasing after big dotcom money. It was great for a while, but as Lao Tzu says, "If you give things too much value, you're going to get ripped off." In the middle of the worst of the frustration, I rediscovered the Tao Te Ching, and realized I needed to finish what I started.

I dug out all my old copies of the TTC and went shopping for more versions, some of which were even better than the ones I'd found the first time. Brian Browne Walker's translation comes close to the modern oral quality I was striving for, though his voice is still much more of an "Eastern sage" voice than mine. David Hinton is somewhat more poetic, but I think he does a wonderful job of capturing what Lao Tzu may have actually sounded like to his contemporaries. And Ursula K. LeGuin strikes a balance between the modern and classical voices that gave me a new perspective on Tao; her commentaries on several chapters are enlightening as well.

I wish I could say that I wrote the remaining sixty-one chapters in a hurried creative frenzy, but things took a little longer than I thought. I got distracted by the decision to move to New York City, and though I did get some work done on the book, it was a little over a year later, when (and, yes, I know how cliched this sounds) the planes crashed into the World Trade Center and I realized I'd still been wasting too much of my life on things that didn't pan out. Instead of talking about getting serious about my life, it was time to actually do it. (Living through the following two and a half years has also made me appreciate chapters 30 and 31 a lot more, for reasons that will become readily apparent.)

So here you are--with my own name attached, as thepseudonym has long since fallen away. From a scholar's point of view, this TTC is unfaithful to the original text on more than one occasion, if not in every single line. Case in point: in chapter 20, Lao Tzu didn't exactly say, "Don't spend too much time thinking about stupid shit." For all the liberties I've taken with his words, however, I've made every attempt to stay true to his message, and I hope you'll find something useful in my efforts.

--Ron Hogan

([email protected])

January 2004

-----

PART ONE

TAO (THE WAY)

-----

1.

If you can talk about it, it ain't Tao. If it has a name, it's just another thing.

Tao doesn't have a name. Names are for ordinary things.

Stop wanting stuff; it keeps you from seeing what's real. When you want stuff, all you see are things.

Those two sentences mean the same thing. Figure them out, and you've got it made.

2.

If something looks beautiful to you, something else must be ugly. If something seems good, something else must seem bad.

You can't have something without nothing. If no job is difficult, then no job is easy. Some things are up high because other things are down low. You know you're listening to music because it doesn't sound like noise. All that came first, so this must be next.

The Masters get the job done without moving a muscle and get their point across without saying a word.

When things around them fall apart, they stay cool. They don't own much, but they use whatever's at hand. They do the work without expecting any favors. When they're done, they move on to the next job.That's why their work is so damn good.

3.

If you toss compliments around freely, people will waste your time trying to impress you. If you give things too much value, you're going to get ripped off. If you try to please people, you'll just make them pissed.

The Master leads by clearing the crap out of people's heads and opening their hearts. He lowers their aspirations and makes them suck in their guts.

He shows you how to forget what you know and what you want, so nobody can push you around. If you think you've got the answers, he'll mess with your head.

Stop doing stuff all the time, and watch what happens.

4.

How much Tao is there? More than you'll ever need. Use all you want, there's plenty more where that came from.

You can't see Tao, but it's there. Damned if I know where it came from. It's just always been around.

5.

Tao's neutral: it doesn't worry about good or evil. The Masters are neutral: they treat everyone the same.

Lao Tzu said Tao is like a bellows: It's empty, but it could help set the world on fire. If you keep using Tao, it works better. If you keep talking about it, it won't make any sense.

Be cool.

6.

Tao is an eternal mystery, and everything starts with Tao.

Everybody has Tao in them. They just have to use it.

7.

Tao never stops. Why? Because it isn't trying to accomplish anything.

The Masters hang back. That's why they're ahead of the game.

They don't hang on to things. That's how they manage to keep them.

They don't worry about what they can't control. That's why they're always satisfied.

8.

"Doing the right thing" is like water. It's good for all living things,and flows without thinking about where it's going

...just like Tao.

Keep your feet on the ground. Remember what's important. Be there when people need you. Say what you mean. Be prepared for anything. Do whatever you can, whenever it needs doing.

If you don't compare yourself to others, nobody can compare to you.

9.

If you drink too much, you get drunk. The engine won't start if you're always tinkering with it.

If you hoard wealth, you fall into its clutches. If you crave success, you succumb to failure.

Do what you have to do, then walk away. Anything else will drive you nuts.

10.

Can you hold on to your ego and still stay focused on Tao?

Can you relax your mind and body and brace yourself for a new life?

Can you check yourself and see past what's in front of your eyes?

Can you be a leader and not try to prove you're in charge?

Can you deal with what's happening and let it happen?

Can you forget what you know and understand what's real?

Start a job and see it through. Have things without holding on to them. Do the job without expectation of reward. Lead people without giving orders. That's the way you do it.

11.

A wheel has spokes, but it rotates around a hollow center.

A pot is made out of clay or glass, but you keep things in the space inside.

A house is made of wood or brick, but you live between the walls.

We work with something, but we use nothing.

12.

Sight obscures. Noise deafens.

Desire messes with your heart. The world messes with your mind.

A Master watches the world but keeps focused on what's real.

13.

Winning can be just as bad as losing. Confidence can mess you up just as much as fear.

What does "winning can be just as bad as losing" mean?

If you're down, you might be able to get up. But if you're up, you can get knocked down real fast. Don't worry about the score, just do what you have to do.

What does "confidence can mess you up just as much as fear" mean?

Fear can keep you from getting the job done, but confidence can get you in over your head.

Walk tall, but don't get cocky. Know your limits, and nothing can ever hold you back. Deal with what you can. The rest will follow.

14.

You can't see Tao, no matter how hard you look. You can't hear Tao, no matter how hard you listen. You can't hold on to Tao, no matter how hard you grab.

But it's there.

It's in you, and it's all around you.

Remember that.

15.

The ancient Masters were damn impressive. They were deep. Real deep. Words can't even begin to describe how deep they were. You can only talk about how they acted.

They were careful, like a man walking on thin ice. They were cautious, like a soldier behind enemy lines. They were polite, like a guest at a party. They moved quickly, like melting ice. They were as plain as a block of wood. Their minds were as wide as a valley, and their hearts as clear as spring water.

Can you wait for that kind of openness and clarity before you try to understand the world?

Can you hold still until events have unfolded before you do the right thing?

When you act without expectations, you can accomplish great things.

16.

Keep your head clear. Stay calm. Watch as everything happens around you.

Everything reverts to its original state, which was nothing. And when something becomes nothing, it gets right with Tao.

If you don't understand that, you're going to screw up somewhere down the line. If you figure it out, you'll always know what to do.

If you get right with Tao, you won't be afraid to die, because you know you will.

17.

When a Master takes charge, hardly anybody notices. The next best leader is obeyed out of love. After that, there's the leader obeyed out of fear. The worst leader is one who is hated.

Trust and respect people. That's how you earn their trust and respect.

The Masters don't give orders; they work with everybody else. When the job's done, people are amazed at what they accomplished.

18.

When people lose touch with Tao, they start talking about "righteousness" and "sanctity."

When people forget what's true, they start talking about "self-evident truths."

When people have no respect for one another, they start talking about "political correctness" and "family values."

When the nation is unstable, people start talking about "patriotism."

19.

Get rid of sanctity. People will understand the truth and be happier.

Get rid of morality. People will respect each other and do what's right.

Get rid of value and profit. People will not steal if they do not desire.

If that's not possible, go to Plan B: Be simple. Be real. Do your work as best you can. Don't think about what you get for it. Stay focused. Get rid of all your crap.

20.

Don't spend too much time thinking about stupid shit. Why should you care if people agree or disagree with you? Why should you care if others find you attractive or not? Why should you care about things that worry others? Call bullshit on all that.

Let other people get worked up and try to enjoy themselves. I'm not going to give myself away. A baby doesn't know how to smile, but it's still happy.

Let other people get excited about stuff. I'm not going to hang on to anything. I'm not going to fill my mind with ideas. I'm not going to get stuck in a rut, tied down to any one place.

Other people are clever; I guess I must be stupid. Other people have goals; I guess I must be aimless. Like the wind. Or the waves.

I'm not like other people. I'm getting right with Tao.

21.

A Master stays focused on Tao. Nothing else, just Tao.

But you can't pin Tao down-- you can't even see it! How are you supposed to focus on something like that?

Just remember what Lao Tzu said: The universe began as a void. The void fills with images. Images lead to the creation of objects. And every object has Tao at its core.

That's the way it's been, ever since the world began. How can I be so sure? I just know.

22.

Learn how to stand still if you want to go places. Get on your knees if you want to stand tall. If you want wisdom, empty your mind. If you want the world, renounce your riches. Push yourself until you're exhausted, and then you'll find your strength.

You can go far if you don't have anything to carry. The more you acquire, the less you can really see.

A Master takes this to heart and sets an example for everybody else.

She doesn't show offso people take notice. She's not out to prove anything so people take her at her word. She doesn't brag about herself but people know what she's done. She hasn't got an agenda but people know what she can do. She's not out to get anybody so nobody can get in her way.

"Learn how to stand still if you want to go places." That's not as crazy as it sounds. Get in touch with Tao, and you'll see what I mean.

23.

When you have nothing to say, you may as well keep your mouth shut. The wind and the rain don't go on forever. If nature knows enough to give it a rest sometimes, so should you.

If you're ready for Tao, you can live with Tao. If you're ready to succeed, you can live with success. If you're ready to fail, you can live with failure.

Trust your instincts, and others will trust you.

24.

Keep your feet firmly planted unless you want to fall on your face. Learn how to pace yourself if you want to get anywhere. Don't call attention to yourself if you want people to notice your work.

Nobody respects people who always have excuses. Nobody gives credit to people who always take it. People who hype themselves have nothing else to offer.

Think of being in touch with Tao like eating at a buffet: Take only what you need. Save some for everybody else.

25.

Something perfect has existed forever, even longer than the universe. It's a vast, unchanging void. There's nothing else like it. It goes on forever and never stops, and everything else came from it.

I don't know what else to call it so I'll call it Tao. What's it like? I can tell you this much: it's great.

So great that it endures. Something that endures goes a long way. And something that goes a long way always comes back to the beginning.

Tao's great. Heaven's great. Earth's great. And someone in touch with Tao is great, too. Those are the four greatest things in the universe.

Someone who's in touch with Tao is in touch with the earth. The earth is in touch with heaven. Heaven's in touch with Tao. Tao's in touch with the way things are.

26.

To be light on your feet, you need a steady mind. If your body is active, your mind should be relaxed.

A Master can travel long distances and still see everything she owns. She may be surrounded by beauty but she isn't caught up in it.

Why run around thoughtlessly? If you act lightly, you lose your bearings. If you act recklessly, you lose your self-control.

27.

With enough practice, you could come and go without a trace, speak without stumbling over words, do complicated math problems in your head.

You could build a door with no lock that nobody could open. You could tie something down with no knots, without even a rope, and nobody could pry it loose.

Masters have time to help everybody, and ignore nobody. They use their resources wisely, wasting nothing. Some people call this "following the light."

Good people teach others because they have the potential to be good too. Brains count for nothing if you fail to respect your teachers or to honor the potential in others. That's one of the most important lessons of Tao.

28.

If you are strong, but remain sensitive, power will flow through you. With that power, you'll always be right with Tao: It's like a whole new life.

If you are idealistic, but stay rooted in reality, you are an example to others. Set that example, and you'll always be right with Tao: There is no limit to what you can do.

If you are honorable, but remain humble, you will see things as they are. If you see things as they are, you'll always be right with Tao: Your life will become simple, yet full of potential.

Let Tao show you how to get right with Tao, so your slightest gesture can change the world.

29.

Want to take over the world? Think again. The world's a holy place. You can't just fuck around with it. Those who try to change it destroy it. Those who try to possess it lose it.

With Tao, you push forward, or maybe you stay behind. Sometimes you push yourself, other times you rest. Sometimes you're strong, sometimes you're weak. Sometimes you're up, and sometimes you're down.

A Master lives simply, avoiding extravagance and excess.

30.

Listen up: If you want to be a leader who's in touch with Tao, never use violence to achieve your goals.

Every act of violence backfires. An army on the move leaves a trail of tears, and a military victory always lies in ruins.

The Masters do what needs doing and that's all they do. Do what you have to do without arrogance or pride. Get the job done and don't brag about it afterwards. Do what you have to do, not for your own benefit, but because it needs to be done. And don't do it the way you think it should be done, do it the way it needs to be done.

The mighty will always lose their power and any connection they ever had to Tao. They will not last long; if you're not right with Tao, you might as well be dead.

31.

Weapons are terrible things. If you want to get right with Tao, reject weapons.

The Master, knowing all things came from Tao, recognizes what he has in common with his enemies and always tries to avoid conflict.

But when there is no other choice, he uses force reluctantly. He does so with great restraint, and never celebrates a victory; to do so would be to rejoice in killing. A person who would rejoice in killing has completely lost touch with Tao.

When you win a war, you preside over a funeral. Pay your respects to the dead.

32.

Tao is an eternal mystery, so small you can never take hold of it.

If a leader gets right with Tao, people will follow him on instinct. All will be right with the world. People will do the right thing without being told.

Everything that comes from Tao needs a name. But once everything has its name, you should make no other distinction between things. This prevents you from becoming trapped by them.

Everything in the universe is full of Tao and leads to Tao, just like the water in rivers that flows into oceans.

33.

Knowing things makes you smart, but knowing yourself makes you wise. To rule others, you must be powerful, but to rule yourself, you must be strong.

If you have only what you need, you have true wealth. If you never give up, you will find a way. If you stay true to yourself, you will never be lost. If you stay alive your whole life, you've really lived.

34.

Tao flows in all directions. It's in everything, but nothing can contain it. Everything needs Tao, so Tao provides, and never expects anything in return.

Everything comes from Tao, but Tao doesn't call attention to itself. It wants for nothing. Think nothing of it.

Everything leads to Tao, but Tao doesn't call attention to itself. Pretty impressive, huh?

It doesn't strive for success. That's why it succeeds.

35.

When you get right with Tao, everybody wants to be your friend. When they're around you, they can relax and enjoy themselves.

People can be easily distracted by music or good food. When we try to talk about Tao, it seems boring by comparison.

It doesn't look like much. It doesn't sound like much. But no matter how much you use, there's still plenty left.

36.

To make something smaller, you need to appreciate its size. To make something weaker, you must recognize its strength. To get rid of something, you need to hold it tight. To take something, you must give it up entirely.

To put it another way: Sensitivity and weakness overcome unfeeling strength.

37.

Tao never does anything but nothing is left undone.

If our leaders could get in touch with Tao, the world would take care of itself. Even if they wanted to impose their own ideas, they'd be drawn back to Tao's nameless simplicity.

When our lives are that simple, we want for nothing. We can relax, and the world becomes a better place.

-----

PART TWO

TE (POWER)

-----

38.

People with integrity don't even think about it. That's how you can tell they have integrity. Other people talk about how much integrity they have, when they really don't have much. If any. Truly powerful people don't do anything, but they get the job done.

Other people are always busy doing something, but nothing ever gets done. When kind people act, they do so without thinking about it. When the just act, they're always sure they're doing the right thing. But when the righteous act, and nobody reacts, they try to force everyone to do things their way.

If you're not in touch with Tao, at least you can still have integrity. If you don't have integrity, there's always kindness. If you don't have kindness, there's always justice. If you don't have justice, all you have left is righteousness.

Righteousness is an pale imitation of true faith and loyalty, and always leads to trouble. If you've already made up your mind, you don't know the first thing about Tao, and you never will.

The Masters pay attention to what's beneath the surface. They'll look at a tree's leaves, but eat the fruit. They turn all that down, so they can accept this.

39.

Since time began, this is what it's meant to be in touch with Tao:

Tao made the heavens clear. Tao made the earth solid. Tao made our spirits strong. Tao made the valleys fertile. Tao gave all living things life.

Tao gave rulers authority. Without Tao, the heavens would collapse. Without Tao, the earth would crumble. Without Tao, our spirits would fade away. Without Tao, the valleys would dry up. Without Tao, all life would become extinct. Without Tao, rulers would stumble and fall.

Humility gives us power. Our leaders should think of themselves as insignificant, powerless, unworthy of their stature. Isn't that what humility is all about?

Be strong, but pay no attention to hollow praise. Don't call attention to yourself. Don't make a scene.

40.

Tao is always heading back to where it came from. Tao advances by not pressing forward.

Things exist because they are. They are because they once were not.

41.

When a wise person hears about Tao, he gets right with it. When an ordinary person hears about Tao, he tries to get right with it, but eventually gives up. When a fool hears about Tao, he just laughs and laughs. If he didn't laugh, it wouldn't be Tao.

Here's what they find so funny: The path to enlightenment seems covered in shadows. The way forward feels like taking a step back. The easiest path seems difficult. Those with the most virtue seem debased. Those who are most pure seem to be grubby and soiled. The deepest thoughts appear shallow. The greatest strength looks like weakness. What is most real strikes us as imaginary. The largest space has no boundaries. The greatest talent seems to produce nothing. The greatest voice is unhearable. The greatest beauty is invisible.

Tao is hidden to us and it has no name. It is the source and the strength of all things.

42.

Chapter 42 starts out with some cosmic mumbo-jumbo about Tao making one, one making two, two making three, and three making everything else.

I don't know what it means, and, frankly, I wouldn't worry about it too much.

Let's get to the practical part: Men hate to be called powerless, insignificant, or unworthy, but that's how Masters describe themselves.

Because when we lose, we've won. And when we succeed, we've failed.

Other people will tell you what I'm telling you now: "Live by the sword, die by the sword." That's pretty much what Chapter 42 boils down to.

(See Chapter 46 for more details.)

43.

The softest force in the universe can overcome the hardest of objects. Something without substance can pass through the space between atoms.

That's how I know about the power of doing nothing.

The silent teachings and the power of doing nothing can only be understood by a few people.

44.

What's more important, fame or your well-being? What's worth more, your money or your life? What is more dangerous, winning or losing?

If you are too attached to your possessions, they will bring you misery. If you hang on to your riches, you will suffer substantial loss. If you know when you have enough, you will never be disgraced. If you practice moderation, you can stay out of trouble.

And that's the secret to lasting success.

45.

The greatest achievements may look like mistakes, but you will always be able to build upon them.

The fullest reserves may seem empty, but you will always be able to draw upon them.

The straightest line looks crooked. The most skilled people come off as clumsy. The most eloquent people are usually silent.

When it's cold, you can move around to stay warm. When it's hot, you should keep still and stay cool. But whatever the weather, if you stay calm, the world will sort itself out around you.

46.

"When the world is right with Tao," Lao Tzu said, "horses haul fertilizer to the fields. When the world loses touch with Tao, horses are trained for cavalry."

Nothing is more insidious than possession. Nothing is more dangerous than desire. Nothing is more disastrous than greed.

If you know when enough is enough, you will always have enough.

47.

You don't have to leave your room to understand what's happening in the world.

You don't have to look out the window to appreciate the beauty of heaven.

The farther you wander, the less you know.

The Masters don't wander around They know. They don't just look. They understand. They don't do anything, but the work gets done.

48.

Usually, we try to learn something new every day.

But if we want to get right with Tao, we have to let go of something every day.

We do less and less, until we end up doing nothing. And it's when we do nothing that we get the job done.

Let events take their course, and everything will turn out in your favor. If you act on your ambitions, they will never pan out.

49.

The Masters don't make up their minds. They turn their thoughts to other people.

They are good to good people, and they're good to bad people. This is real goodness.

They have faith in the faithful, and they have faith in the unfaithful. This is real faith.

A Master throws himself into the world completely, forgetting everything he's been told. People pay attention to him because he lives a life of child-like wonder.

50.

People who look for the secret of long life wind up dead.

Their bodies are the focus of their lives and the source of their death, because they think a healthy body is all there is to life.

Lao Tzu used to say a man who truly understood life could walk through the jungle without fear or across a battlefield without armor, totally unarmed. Wild animals and weapons couldn't kill him.

I know, I know: what the hell does that mean? "Well, he couldn't be killed," Lao Tzu said, "because his body wasn't where he kept his death."

51.

Tao is the source of all living things, and they are nourished by Tao's power. They are influenced by the other living things around them, and they are shaped by their circumstances.

Everything respects Tao and honors its power. That's just the way it is.

Tao gives life to all things, and its power watches out for them, cares for them, helps them grow, protects them, and comforts them.

Create something without holding on to it. Do the work without expecting credit for it. Lead people without giving them orders. That's the secret of the power of Tao.

52.

Everything starts with Tao, the mother of all things. If you know the mother, you know the children. If you know the children and remember the mother, you have nothing to fear in your life.

Shut your mouth and keep still, and your life will be full of happiness. If you talk all the time, always doing something, your life will be hopeless.

It takes insight to see subtlety. It takes strength to yield gently to force. Use that strength to hang on to your insight, and you will always be at peace. That's how to get right with Tao.

53.

If I had any sense, I'd be trying to get right with Tao, and the only thing I'd worry about would be messing up. It's not that hard to get right with Tao, but people are easily distracted.

"When the king's palace is full of treasure," Lao Tzu said, "ordinary people's fields are smothered with weeds, and the food supplies run out." Today, you see sharply dressed people carrying flashy weapons and living the high life.

They own more than they could ever use, let alone need.

They're nothing but gangsters and crooks. That's not what Tao's about.

54.

Tao's power is so deeply entrenched it can never be uprooted. Tao's power clings so tightly it can never slip away. It will endure for generations.

If you get in touch with the power of Tao, it will become real. If your family gets in touch with the power of Tao, the power will flourish.

If your community gets in touch with the power of Tao, the power will grow even stronger. If your country gets in touch with the power of Tao, the power will become abundant.

If the world gets in touch with the power of Tao, the power will be everywhere. How can I know this? I just do.

55.

A person filled with the power of Tao is like a baby boy: bees can't sting him, wild beasts can't attack him.

A baby has soft bones and weak muscles, but a firm grip. He hasn't had sex, but he can get an erection. That's because he's got lots of energy. He can cry all day and never lose his voice. That's because he's at one with his world.

If you're at one with the world, you know constancy. And if you know constancy, you've been enlightened.

It's not healthy to try to prolong your life. It's unnatural to impose the mind's will upon the body. People waste time and energy trying to be strong or beautiful, and their strength and beauty fade. They've lost touch with Tao, and when you lose touch with Tao, you might as well be dead.

56.

Those who know, don't talk. Those who talk, don't know.

Shut your mouth. Be still. Relax. Let go of your worries. Stay out of the spotlight. Be at one with the world and get right with Tao. If you get right with Tao, you won't be worried about praise or scorn, about winning or losing, about honor or disgrace. That's the way to be.

57.

You can run a country by sticking to principles, and you can win a war with strategy and tactics. But you can gain the entire world by doing nothing at all.

How do I know this? I've seen it happen: The more restrictions a nation imposes, the poorer its people become. When a nation hoards weapons, troubles arise from within and from without. When its leaders try to be cunning and clever, the situation spins further out of control. When they try to fix things by passing more laws, they only increase the number of outlaws.

A wise leader says to himself: "I do nothing, and people transform themselves. I keep silent, and they do the right thing on their own. I stay out of the way, and they prosper. I want for nothing, and they lead simple lives."

58.

When a nation is ruled with a light touch, people lead simple lives. When a government is harsh and demanding, people will spend their time trying to outsmart it.

Happiness is rooted in misery, and misery lurks beneath all joy. Who knows what could happen tomorrow?

Everything is relative; what's considered proper today may become improper. Correct appearances may hide dishonesty and sinfulness.

No wonder so many people get confused.

The Masters have sharp minds, not sharp tongues. They are austere, but never judgmental. They are straightforward, but not provocative. They are brilliant, but not flashy.

59.

Leadership is based on moderation. Practice moderation, and you'll get in touch with the power of Tao.

If you get right with Tao, nothing is impossible. If you get right with Tao, there's no limit to what you can do. If you get right with Tao, you can be a true leader.

Remember this advice if you want to be a leader: Plant deep roots in firm soil. Get right with Tao, and you'll always see things clearly.

60.

Being a leader is like cooking a small fish; get right with Tao, and it's quick and easy.

When you're in touch with Tao, you don't need to worry about misfortune. You can't make it go away, of course, but you can keep it from harming other people.

Also, as a wise leader, you cause no harm to others, so people won't have to worry about getting hurt, and they'll take the opportunity to do the right thing.

61.

Power flows down to every level of existence like a river to the ocean.

Victory comes from lying perfectly still and waiting for power to come your way.

If you yield to someone less powerful than yourself, you will be in a position to influence them.

If you submit to someone more powerful than yourself, you create an opportunity to get your own way.

So if you want to get ahead, lay low and bide your time. That way, everybody's happy.

62.

Every living thing gets its strength from Tao. Good people respect the value of Tao. The wicked and foolish don't, but Tao provides for them anyway.

Some people gain power and prestige through fancy words, others through great deeds. But Tao is available to everyone, not just the powerful. So don't look down on anybody.

When people become powerful, and everybody lines up to kiss their ass, sit still and stay right with Tao.

Why have the Masters always respected Tao? Because when you get right with Tao, you can always find what you need to get by, and trouble can never find you.

63.

Keep still. Don't work so hard. Learn to appreciate everyday life. Pay attention to details. Start small and work your way up. When people give you trouble, let it slide.

Break everything down to its essentials. Get the job done before it becomes a chore.

With the right preparation, difficult tasks can be completed with ease; every major project consists of simple steps.

The Masters don't take on more than they can handle, which is why they can do just about anything.

Don't promise more than you can deliver, and don't underestimate the task: You'll only make things harder for yourself.

The Masters are always aware of the difficulties involved, which is why they never have to deal with them.

64.

It's easy to maintain balance. Trouble can be nipped in the bud. Fragile things break easily, and small things are easy to lose.

Deal with the situation before it becomes a problem. Keep everything straight so it can't get messed up.

Every tree was once a seed. Every skyscraper started out with a shovelful of dirt. And--stop me if you've heard this one before-- a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.

When you try too hard, you defeat your own purpose. Cling to stuff, and you will suffer loss. The Masters make no effort, so they never fail. They aren't attached to things, so they never feel loss.

People often screw up when the job's nearly done. Pay as much attention to the finishing touches as you do to the initial steps, and you won't screw up like that.

The Masters try to be free from desire. They don't collect precious things. They don't cling to any beliefs. They pay attention to what everybody else ignores. They help the world get right with Tao, but don't try to change a thing.

65.

In ancient times, leaders who were right with Tao didn't teach everybody how to become enlightened. They kept people's lives simple.

People who know too much can't be taught anything. Leaders who try to be clever always screw things up. Leaders who keep things simple always make things right.

If you get that, you'll understand the mysterious power of Tao.

That kind of power is so deep, so extensive, it penetrates into every level of existence.

66.

An ocean is greater than the hundred rivers that flow into it, and all it does is wait to receive what they bring.

If you want to teach people, don't talk down to them. If you want to lead them, find out where they want to go.

People love leaders who make them feel safe without smothering them. They'll always support a leader like that, and because he doesn't try to compete with anybody, nobody is able to compete with him.

67.

Everywhere I go, people tell me, "Tao is so powerful, so immense, it's inconceivable!"

But it's only powerful because it's inconceivable. If we could wrap our minds around it, Tao would be just another thing.

The three most important qualities in life are compassion, or showing kindness and mercy to others, moderation, or knowing what a thing is worth, and modesty, or knowing your place in the world.

Courage stems from showing kindness and mercy to others. Generosity starts with knowing what a thing is worth. True leadership begins with knowing your place in the world.

But these days, I see everyone trying to act courageous without any trace of compassion. They try to be generous but they don't practice moderation in their own lives. They act like leaders, but they have no sense of modesty. No good can come of this.

If you want to get ahead, show people compassion. When other people attack you, defend yourself with compassion. It's the most powerful force in the universe.

68.

A true warrior never uses force with an attitude of pride or anger. A true victor does not pursue vengeance. A true leader shows humility.

This is the power of modesty. It's the best way to deal with people. It's always been an excellent way to get right with Tao.

69.

There's an old military saying: "I'd rather face an attack than have to make one. I'd rather retreat a foot than try to advance an inch."

That's the secret to moving forward while staying put, preparing for battle without revealing your strength.

When you defend yourself without any show of force, you give your opponent nothing to fight.

Attacking an enemy you've underestimated is a costly mistake. When two forces oppose each other, the winner is the one most reluctant to fight.

70.

Lao Tzu's advice was easy to understand and easy to follow. But nobody understood him or did what he suggested.

His words stemmed from ancient wisdom, and his actions were highly disciplined. People didn't get that, which is why they didn't understand him. And the less they understood him, the more meaningful his advice became.

That's why the Masters live simply, hiding their wisdom deep within themselves.

71.

If you know what you don't know, you're doing great. If you don't know what you don't know, you're sick.

The only way to get rid of that sickness is to be sick of it.

The Masters aren't sick, because they got sick of being sick.

72.

When you show no fear at all, the universe gives you something to really be afraid of.

Don't try to fence people in or grind them down. Just let them be, and they'll always be on your side.

The Masters know themselves, but they don't reveal themselves. They love themselves, but they know what their lives are worth. They let go of all that to concentrate on this.

73.

Those who dare to be bold die. Those who dare to be careful survive. So--what do you want to do?

Why is life like that, you ask? I don't know.

This is how Tao works: It doesn't push itself, and it always succeeds. It acts silently, and it always reacts. It can't be summoned; it comes whenever it's ready. It can't be rushed; it's always on time.

"Heaven casts a wide net, with big holes," Lao Tzu used to say, "but nothing ever gets by it."

74.

If people's lives suck, and they look forward to death, what good does it do to threaten to kill them?

If people are afraid to die, and the wicked are condemned to death, then who would dare to commit evil?

But that doesn't mean you or I can just take life and death into our own hands. That'd be like walking up to an industrial buzzsaw and trying to use it without any training. We'd only end up hurting ourselves.

75.

People starve because the government taxes them to death. People rebel because the government tries to run their lives. People act like life is meaningless because the government takes everything they have.

People who know how to enjoy life are wiser than people who value their lives.

76.

A baby's body is soft and gentle. A corpse is hard and stiff. Plants and trees are tender and full of sap. Dead leaves are brittle and dry.

If you are rigid and unyielding, you might as well be dead. If you are soft and flexible, you are truly alive.

Soldiers trained to fight to the death will die. A tree that cannot bend with the wind will snap.

Here's a useful saying: The harder they come, the harder they fall.

Here's another: The meek shall inherit the earth.

77.

Lao Tzu said using Tao was like pulling on a bowstring: The top bends down, the bottom bends up, and all the energy is focused in the middle.

Tao takes energy from where it is, and sends it where it needs to be. But most people take from those who don't have enough, so those who have too much already can have more.

So who in this world is truly generous to others? People who are in touch with Tao. They do their work without taking credit. They get the job done and move on. They aren't interested in showing off.

78.

Nothing is softer or more yielding than water. Yet, given time, it can erode even the hardest stone. That's how the weak can defeat the strong, and the supple can win out over the stiff.

Everybody knows it. So why don't we apply it to our own lives?

Lao Tzu used to say: "Take on people's problems, and you can be their leader. Deal with the world's problems, and you'll be a Master."

Sometimes the truth makes no sense.

79.

Sometimes, when an argument is settled, feelings of resentment still remain on either side. What's the point of carrying a grudge?

The Masters care about what they owe other people, not what other people owe them.

People who are in touch with Tao do their duty. People who aren't try to force others into submission.

Tao doesn't play favorites. But if you do right by Tao, Tao will do right by you.

80.

Lao Tzu had a dream about a small country with very few people.

They didn't need machines to get their work done faster. They took their lives seriously, and stayed close to home.

They may have owned boats and carriages, but they never went anywhere. They may have owned weapons, but they kept those weapons locked up, securely hidden. They had so few responsibilities, they never had to make a To-Do list to remember what had to be done.

They enjoyed simple foods, dressed plainly, lived comfortably, and kept their traditions alive.

And even though their neighbors were so close they could hear the dogs barking at night, they had no interest in leaving their homes, where they grew old peacefully and died.

81.

The truth isn't flashy. Flashy words aren't true.

Educated people aren't always smart. Smart people don't always have an education.

Good people don't argue. People who argue aren't good.

The Masters don't hang on to things. They're always doing something for other people, so they always have more to give. They give away whatever they have, so what they have is worth more.

If you want to get right with Tao, help other people, don't hurt them. The Masters always work with people, never against them.

(with thanks to ronhogan)

#ron hogan #favourite #wisdom #tao

[badcowboy69]

You ready for this one Travis!? A7, A17, B9, B12, C1, C5, C6, D1, D2, D5, E1, E8, F5, F10, F11, F12, H1, H8, H9, I1, I6, J1, J5, J6, L1, L2, and L4!

Hooo boy...well, this took a while and it was pretty fun having Travis answer the questions.  He was so flattered that you did that!  He also hopes he did well as he’s never answered this many questions at one time before!  Anyway, long reading ahead! Thanks so much for asking these, we both appreciate it!

A7  Is your OC confident in their reactions to life in general, or do they get embarrassed or easily shamed for it? I.e., if something startles them, do they insist it WAS scary? When they cry, do they feel like they overreacted?    

Ain’t nothing to be ashamed of in how you react to life.  So yeah, I reckon I am confident in those things.  Crying though is another story.  I don’t like to cry in front of people, especially someone I know or love.  Ain’t saying it can’t and won’t happen, but I do all I can to make it not happen.  Does that make sense? Really, though, if I cry when I’m angry about something, you best be taking cover because that means seriously bad things are going to start happening.  

A17  What’s one of your OC’s proudest moments of themselves?

Hmmm...I reckon it’d certainly gotta be me taking my motorcycle and trekking across the country to the Commonwealth in search of cats.  Lots of unexplored territory to be sure.  I ventured into the unknown if you think about it.  Had my pip-boy update terrain maps and stuff like that if I found a computer somewheres.  I mostly avoided any towns and stayed as far from people as I could.  It wasn’t until I got to the DC area where I tried to mingle with folks.  They seemed right pleasant and all.  Found Boston, found the cats, and found one hell of a guy too.  So a’yup, taking a huge risk like that’s  gotta be my proudest moment.

B9  What kind of humor does your OC like the most? Slapstick, ironic, funny sounds, scare pranks, xD sO rAnDoM…

I love sarcastic wit and snappy comebacks the best.  But still, anything that makes me laugh I like.  I also like making people laugh.  Scare pranks are wrong, though.  Jokes are meant to be funny, not showing how much of a dick you are.

B12  Your OC orders something to eat and gets their order done in a pretty wrong way, something they can’t just pick off or whatnot to correct, or something major is missing. What do they do?  

Well, when having a complaint you should always start with a positive before the negative that way the person you’re talking to don’t get defensive.  I’d tell the waiter that this is fantastic and looks or tastes great (if I already took a bite).  Then I’d go on to say, however, I really was wanting this or that.  Whatever the issue is wasn’t done on purpose or to piss you off so why treat it like that?  

C1  Does your OC have a moral code? If not, how do they base their actions? If so, where does it come from, and how seriously do they take it?

I always had a thing about a true man keeping his word (that goes for the ladies too really).  I won’t say or promise anything I don’t mean or don’t intend to do.  Hell, I’m even the kind of person where if I promised I’d do something and me and that person had a falling out I’d still try and keep my promise to them regardless.  Trust me, I take that pretty seriously.  You can’t keep your word then you probably can’t be trusted none either.

C5   Do your OC’s morals and rules of common decency go out the window when it comes to those they don’t like, or when it’s inconvenient? Aka, are their morals situational?

Hmm...reckon it does depend on the situation.  I mean, I don’t like unarmed people getting hurt, but if I see some weaponless Fiend out in the desert trying to rape a woman or choke a kid, mark my word they will get a bullet up their ass. Sometimes one’s gotta forget what’s considered morals and do what’s right.

C6,   What do they do when they see someone asking for money or food? If they ignore them, why? If they help, how so?

I’ve been told I’m a phil...umm...philly antro pissed or something like that.  I got more caps than I really need and already do a bunch of donations to the Bitter Springs Refugee Camp and to Fort Mormon.  Ain’t too many people in Freeside or in New Vegas begging for money or food these days, but out in the Mojave it’s something that unfortunately happens from time to time.  I do what I can to help them, but not to the point where they become a leech.  I ain’t nobody’s father.

D1,  How religious is your OC? What do they practice, if anything? If they don’t associate with any religion, what do they think of religion in general?

Ain’t religious.  I reckon you can say I’m spiritual of sorts, but I don’t follow anything set.  I mean, it’s pretty nice thinking someone or something out there is watching over me.  But I’m not sure what to make of it.  Religion, well, no.  It’s all an organized cult if you think about it.  No thanks.

D2,  Do they believe in an afterlife?

I am torn on this one.  I’d like to think there’s something in the great beyond.  I know I was pretty much dead after getting shot, but I don’t remember much of that let alone what came afterwards.

D5,  Do they believe in ghosts? If not, why? If so, do they think they’re magical/tie into their religion, or are they scientifically plausible?

I’ve seen a lot of unexplained shit out in the Mojave and sometimes I’ve even been helped by a mysterious stranger of sorts from time to time.  Ain’t sure if they were a ghost or not, but I have a feeling we ain’t exactly alone.  

E1,  Would you say that your OC is intelligent? In what ways? Would your OC agree?

I think I’m pretty dang smart.  Now, I know I ain’t no genius or anything and I surely don’t have the smarts a lot of other people have, but, I think I still am rather intelligent.  In battles I plot things out instead of rushing head-first into them.  I can learn things rather quickly and know a lot about a lot.  Lots of my smarts got me out of situations that could have gone very badly otherwise.  I know I still got lots to learn, or relearn rather, but then again who doesn’t?

E8,  What’s one of your OC’s biggest regrets?  

Hate to even answer this, but probably getting involved with a certain NCR First Recon Sniper is my biggest regret.  Now don’t go telling me crap about that ‘loved and loss’ shit...trust me...I would have much rather to not know what that loss felt like or even that love.  I used to wonder if he only got involved with me ‘cause he didn’t think he’d live much longer or something and wanted to feel affection one last time.  

F5, How handy are they? Can they fix appliances, cars, cabinets, et cetera?

Ain’t much I can’t fix, really.  Robots, appliances, guns... Hell, I fixed up a motorcycle by using the energy cores from Mister Handy robots in order to make it run.  If that don’t say handy then I don’t know what would.  Currently I’m studying the old Giddyup Buttercup toys.  What’s a cowboy without a horse?  Gonna make me a full sized one using the old toy as a model as well as pre-war books to help me understand how those critters functioned.

F10,  Do they engage in any of the arts? How good do you intend them to be? Would they agree they are?

Is playing a guitar arts?  Probably not.  Ummm...I do draw once in awhile, but ain’t nothing too fancy or spectacular.  Not sure if writing is considered an art, but I do that dang good.  Painting, not so much.  I tried and it’s horrible.  Acting...well, I suppose I can be good at that.  I was told I can bullshit my way out of anything.

F11,  What are some of their favorite things to do for recreation? How did they get into it? What part of it do they like the most?

You sure you want me to be answering something like this?  Sex!   Ok ok I’ll be serious!  I like to fish in the non-radiated waters of Lake Mead. Got into it because I like to eat hah!  I like to camp and I do like to explore.  Got into that because it was a part of my life as a courier and from what I can scantly recall, when I was a cowboy at a brahmin run.  Riding my motorcycle is a big thing for me.  Once I got one of those working it opened up a whole new world.  

F12, Would they enjoy a theme park?

Ahhh yes!  Riley’s told me all about those and dang I would have loved to go on some of those rides!  In the town of Primm there’s a broken down roller coaster thingy that has been sorta repaired.  Now the trouble is finding out how to make it work and get the cars for it.  Yeah, I know that ain’t a theme park, but I’ll take what I can get.

H1, What is your OC’s orientation, romantic and/or sexual? Has it ever been a source of stress for them? Have they always been pretty sure of their orientation?

Lots of questions in one in this thing, didja notice that?  Lordy...anyhoo, I’m a confirmed bachelor (which means gay).  Ain’t never been a source of stress for me.  Women, now that’s a source of stress.  Lordy, you tell some of them you’re gay and they look at you like you’re crazy or they say stupid shit like they can make you forget all about that and turn.  As for being pretty sure of my orientation, as far back as I’m able to remember, my answer is yes and it’s still a very solid yes right now.  I am romantic and I am sexual, but to only one person.  

H8, What’s your OC’s idea of a perfect date?

Oh, now you’re wanting to see the mush side of me, huh?  Reckon it would be to get all dressed up in something snazzy.  Make the first stop somewheres nice to eat.  Have some wine maybe while we chat about stuff.  Afterwards take a small stroll arm in arm to a lake or a nice place facing west.  I’ll build a campfire and we can watch the sunset when it happens.  Just the two of us enjoying the outside and peace in each other’s company is the best really.  Good food followed by good company all sound perfect to me.

H9, What are some things that your OC finds to be an instant turn-off in potential partners?

Man, I don’t like hateful people or people stuck on themselves.  I also really dislike loud-mouth drunks or people who can’t take no for an answer.  I reckon, too, anyone that’s mean to critters can be part of the list.  

I1, What are their favorite kinds of flavors– Sweet, salty, sour, spicy, creamy, et cetera?

HOT!  I love hot and spicy foods.  People say I probably burned my tastebuds to hell from eating hot stuff so much, but that ain’t true.  I also have a sweet tooth and do like fruity flavors as well.

I6, Could they eat the same thing they enjoy over and over and not get bored of it quickly?

Oh heck yeah!  I can probably eat jalapenos all the time and most certainly a nice brahmin rib-eye steak!  I like to drink beer and not get bored of it, but is that considered a food?

J1, Where does your OC stand most politically? What would they align with most?

For me as long as the cause is just and has the interests of the people and critters I’ll support them.

J5, Are they or would they protest for a cause they’re passionate about?

Yeah, I would protest something as long as the meanings behind it are just. Sometimes people bitch about something just to bitch and it makes things worse.  I can’t stand that.  Stand up for what you believe in, but make sure it’s really what you want and will change things for the better.

J6, How do they react to people whose political viewpoints are very opposite of theirs?

As long as they don’t shove it in my face I really don’t pay them much mind.  We’re all allowed to have different likes and viewpoints.  However, like in the case of Caesar’s Legion...no.  That’s bad!  You’re bad!  End of story!

And now for the section directed at me, Travis’ mun!

L1, How have your characters changed since you created them?

Travis has been part of me ever since I was a little cowgirl.  He went from me being a cowboy riding a palomino stallion to becoming a created video game character taking over New Vegas in Fallout New Vegas.  He then went on to age six years so he could be involved in the life of a certain sole survivor (and simply be involved in the Fallout 4 world).  Travis is also alive and well in the world of Sims 4.  Not too much has changed with him, but with him becoming more “alive” in the Fallout world it’s been amazing and fun developing him.  

L2  What do you consider the biggest themes in your character, if any?

He’s always a country boy in western garb.  Even in his Sims life he can be found sporting a cowboy hat and boots, playing a guitar, loving country music, and just being a sweet good ole boy.

L4!  Would you hang out with your OC if you could?

Even though he is pretty much me for the most part, yes, I would most certainly hang out with him.  He’s a fun, and loving great guy who is very playful and kind.

#ask #abouttravis #long post #thank you for sending these #free-hugs-for-ghouls

[generouslyteenagealpaca-blog]

What kind of coverage do I need for my motorcycle insurance during storage months? It has a lien on it.?

"What kind of coverage do I need for my motorcycle insurance during storage months? It has a lien on it.?

I kind of already figured that I need to keep the full coverage. I guess what I wanted to ask is what parts of the coverage can I take off while the bike is in storage? Or can I just set all of it to the minimum? My coverage by the way is 140 a month.

BEST ANSWER:  Try this site where you can compare quotes: : http://averageinsurancecost.xyz/index.html?src=tumblr 

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hello does anyone know where I can find a low cost insurance that covers everything for pregnant women including doctor visits & delivery,,,in Southern California. Discard Medi-Cal & AIM, since i dont qualify :(""

Geico car insurance !?

i have car insurance with Geico, on the policy was said Effective date : 12/20/2009 ... ( just bought insurance from Geico on 12/29/2009 ). i got accident today,( 12/22/2009 ),a deer jump into the front of my car and the front bumper messed up really bad... i know on the policy its said the effective date is 12/20/200/9 but still i wonder am i cover when i just recently bought the car insurance from them ( for 1 day and a half i guess ) ?!!! am just so ... panic and .. confuse right now !""

Is there such a thing as a joint life insurance plan?

Just wondering if there is such a thing that would cover my spouse and I on one policy. For ex. 20 or 30 year policy for around $150,000.00 where either myself or spouse would ride the policy.""

Cheapest cars for insurance for a teenage boy?

This is what I know: 4WD and newer cars means higher rates. I know certain cars, particularly Honda Civics and Accords from the 90's were commonly broken into and stolen, and that raised rates. I think I'll be responsible for paying my own insurance and gas. (Unfortunately I do live in a snow climate, but we haven't had real heavy snows in a while) So, it would be VERY helpful to list some non-boring/decent, reliable cars, that would be best/good on insurance costs! Thanks!""

Guaranteed Car Insurance?

I am having trouble finding car insurance because I am only eighteen, and my car is quite expensive. Does anyone know of an insurance site that will give you insurance no matter the conditions? I am willing to pay any amount to get comprehensive cover.""

Car insurance opting out?

I renewed my car insurance for the year, but then my car broke down and i do not wish to spend the money to fix it. its been 4 months into the insurance plan, can i cancel it and get some money back?""

What is currently the cheapest car insurance in California?

Its time for my car insurance renewal and I noticed that the rates have gone up by 100 dollars since last year and all the previous years. I have Access Insurance and though the fees have got up, it still seems like the cheapest one so far. Does anyone have any suggestions about other companies?""

Whats the average cost a month for car insurance in california for an 18 year old?

Whats the average cost a month for car insurance in california for an 18 year old?

How much is the insurance on 50cc scooter for a 16 year old?

Please could you tell me the amount for full comp, cheers""

Does anyone know which insurance companies do not using residential location in calculating car insurance?

I guess I have heard a few months ago that some car insurance companies will not include the location of where the car would be parked in their calculation of car insurance. The media touted that it will cost less to car owners who live in high traffic areas such as Los Angeles. Any input will be welcome

Which are the cheaper car insurance in UK?

Which are the cheaper car insurance in UK?

Car Insurance for a friend?

I have a friend (single mom of 2) and she needs to get cheap car insurance on her ford explore. She let it lapse for 6 months and now her loan company wants to repo her car, even though she has made every car payment. (she leases her car)...(kinda like rent to own) She got a quote from my agent, but it was going to be way too much for her. I am guessing since she still owes on the car she has to have full coverage. And can only afford less than $100.00 a month on it. She is a renter, she is going to school, and has bad credit. Are there any companies out there that she can get a good deal or at least get coverage for 6 months and re-apply with a better company?? The only one I have found out there was the general.com. And they seem to be ok...but I don't know what other options she has. Thanks for reading this!! 10 points to the best answer!!""

How much would car insurance cost for a 17 year old girl?

Right, I'm 17. I getting my provisional licence in the next week or so, so I can start my driving lessons. When and if I pass my theory and practical, I would like to get my own car. I have a rough idea of which car I would like to get, but have no idea what I can do to get a rough idea on insurance. I've tried looking at a few websites and they're all useless haha. I'd love to have a Peugeot 106. Not the best car I know, but it would be suitable for me. I live in an area with off road parking, so this could possibly bring the insurance down a little. If someone can give a rough quote themselves, it'd be much appreciated and I can begin to plan ahead.""

I want to finance a car. Can the registration and insurance be under my brothers' name?

Will a car dealership allow me to register the car under my brother? I want to put the car in my brothers name because the insurance will be cheaper. His credit is in better than mine.

Does my insurance background disappear when i cancel my insurance premium?

What i mean is you know how some insurance companies give you a little discount if you havent gotten into an accident or received any tickets or any sort for a year? Well say After one year you cancel your insurance for about 7 months, and then you want to get re-insured, would that discount still be available? Or canceling the insurance would mean your background is gone? I plan on leaving for basic training for the Army and ill be gone for 7 months. Ive been driving since i was 17 and almost have a year in clean record and wouldnt mind the good drivers discount?""

Where can i get cheap auto insurance for an 18 year old student with a mustang?

Well this may sound like a long shot, but I just recently bought my son a Ford Mustang, Now its insurance time, hes 18, gets A's in school and has had drivers ed. Why do the quotes from Progressive and esurance estimate its going to cost nearly $500 a month, even with a 1990 honda junker it still cost nearly $400 do these prices seem reasonable, i cant recall them being that high, when i first got insurance, thanks.""

What's a good health insurance option for a 22 yr. old male?

My boyfriend just lost his coverage under his parents policy and needs insurance that's pretty affordable but still covers things such as: -emergencies (of course!) -vaccinations -yearly doctor visits/sport physicals Any recommendations are welcome! Thanks!

Are there any programs for college kids to get cheap dental insurance?

In college, not covered by my parent's insurance and can't get it at my job. Is there any sort of programs where College age students can get a relatively cheap dental insurance, or dental work done on the cheap? If it helps, I'm in Oklahoma.""

What is the cheapest car insurance company for an 18 year old learner driver?

Thanks xxx

What is the best insurance website?

i need to know so i can go to it and get insurance

How much will the Insurance cost me for A 1999 Mitsubishi Eclipse ?

I am 17, and I was thinking about my first car, and I've been doing some research and I love the Mitsubishi Eclipse and I can afford to buy one since $1000-9000 is in my price range, I found a perfect 1999 Black Mitsubishi Eclipse is great condition for $6,999, but since I'm a new driver insurance will not be easy but I don't want to take full coverage I just want PiP. Anyone that works at an insurance company that could help or anyone who knows how insurance works answer my question.""

New driver insurance question?

Hey I just passed my theory test in the state of California. I need to start practicing driving and take my driving test. I am going to buy a car and also need insurance. Will I need a different insurance package as a learner driver? When I pass my test will I have to get a new insurance package as a license holder? I moved to CA from UK where I held a license for four years.

What kind of coverage do I need for my motorcycle insurance during storage months? It has a lien on it.?

I kind of already figured that I need to keep the full coverage. I guess what I wanted to ask is what parts of the coverage can I take off while the bike is in storage? Or can I just set all of it to the minimum? My coverage by the way is 140 a month.

""How much do you think car insurance would be, ballpark range?""

I'm getting my first car in a few weeks, and we're going to *** it to my parents' insurance. They have a car and a van, and I wonder what the difference would be to add my volkswagon new beetle-to-be to their plan. My goal is to budget $400 to the car each month for payments and insurance. Do i have the right idea? (payment $150-200 hopefully) That'll leave me $400 give or take spending and saving. Thanks much.""

What is a good and cheep health insurance?

i only need it for a month i'm 19 years old and in good health. oh i live in florid

Do i still have to pay my car insurance?

i just started driving and i had a small crash im 3rd party insurance i scrapped the car couldnt afford the insurance and mot ect ,i still have to pay insurance for the year so i mite as well have kept the car is there anyway i can cancel as im in financial hardship""

Can you give me any tips for finding cheap medical insurance in California?

Can you give me any tips for finding cheap medical insurance in California?

Cheap car insurance?

Cheap car insurance?

2010 camaro car insurance for 16 year old teen???

So ever since I saw te first transformers movie I have loved the look of the camaro, and after 7 years I'm deciding if I should get one as my first car. Im a major gear head, especially muscle cars. So I've been looking at some 2010 models that are around 14-16 grand. I make on average of 350-400 dollars every two weeks at my job, and I have enough to put around 5000$ down, now more or less ill be paying some where around 180-230$ a month. Now what worries me is the insurance cost.... I know for a first time 16 year old teen it's a bit expensive, so basically on average how much would the insurance be a month? Just an estimated cost would be perfect, and please don't tell me it depends, just a General estimation please and thank you, ps I have a 3.6 gpa and never been arrested, don't know if that helps lol""

What is the best low cost health insurance for a small business owner with no employees?

I have two daughters, one fifteen years old in high school and the other is 21 and a college student. I am a 49 year old woman and in fair health. My husband is a Vietnam vet in fair health as well and will be eligible for medicare this year, so he will not need this insurance.""

Im 18 with no no claims need fast car low insurance group!?

im 18 (just) been drivin a year on mums policy no smashes no points no nothing i just sold my car and i been looking at honda crx's insurance turned round and said NO!!! grrr kill them. but yeah i got 1.5k to spend on a decent car with low insurance group? any ideas? cant really find a website that compares speed and insurance group, any ideas welcome thanks in advance!!!""

Cheap Car Insurance for my first car?

My dad owns it but hes giving it to me technically he wants me to pay insurance and I want something cheap, the majority of insurances say im underage to be reliable for it. I'm 17, is there a cheap insurance for my little chevorlate cavalier car?""

I am 19 and own a 1978 camaro in Michigan what would be the cheapest insurance company?

I am 19 and own a 1978 camaro in Michigan what would be the cheapest insurance company?

Will insurance points carry over to another company?

I have 9 insurance points. My mom is wondering if she signs me onto her policy, will the rates go up dramatically, or will they still be reasonable?""

How much would insurance cost for a 1990 pontiac firebird?

I am 17 and a new driver but I was going to buy a 1990 firebird and I was wondering what the average price I would have to pay for this car

Car insurance for teens?

i want to get a 2004 spyder eclipse two door, and i'm on my parents insurance (farmers insurance) because i'm 17, and was wondering if anyone knows about how much it will be a month.......""

What should i do to proof '' Health Insurance '' in Student Visa?

Hello, I am applying for a student visa, to study in Germany, one of the requirements in the Visa is to proof of '' Health Insurance '', And the another is Financial proof, I can understand the second one, But Can you tell me please WHAT SHOULD I DO TO PROOF HEALTH INSURANCE? thanks, in Advance:)""

What will my insurance company do about my car?

Last night we had server thunderstorms. There was golf-ball sized hail for about five minutes. I was parked on top of the garage. My windows are fine, but there are dents all over my car and my right side-view mirror is broken. My car is still in my mother's name, and the insurance company is State Farm. My parents are on a cruise right now and are supposed to be getting back tomorrow. I also go to UT and out-of-state school. I've heard other people on campus are getting new cars from their companies and others are just getting windows replaced. I haven't talked to anyone yet since the car is not in my name. My car is a 2001 chevy caviler. I don't know any of the details of the insurance policy.""

What is the california vehicle code for insurance?

What is the california vehicle code for insurance?

Can you put a relative from another state on your insurance plan?

I live in North Carolina and my Dad lives in Texas. I am going to college close to my mother who current ly insures me. I am not going to have a car for probably 2-3 years, and will literally never drive my moms car when I am at home, but my mom is paying a large amount of money to be on her plan. The insurance people said that you have to be more than 100 miles away from her to be taken off because there is resonable doubt I would drive. I was wondering if state laws allow for me to be insured by my dads plan in Tx, if so, would it cost a lot to be on his? If thats not possible, is there anyway to be taken off my moms or to not be insured at all?""

How does car insurance work for teenagers?

Im 18 and I took Driver`s Ed last summer, so I know that was supposed to save some cash when it came to the insurance. I also heard that depending on the engine of the car, the insurance changes. How do you determine the insurance on a 6-cylinder and an 8-cylinder car? Thanks""

22yo motorcycle insurance?

I have a 125cc motorcycle and im 22 with my m2 and driver training but the cheapest insurance i could find is $2500 a year!!!!!!!!! Does anyone have anything better for a young guy???

How to get TD auto insurance quote in Ontario?

I am a new driver in Ontario with G2 licence. Never had insurance before. Got my G1in Oct. 2012 and G2 in Oct 2013. I am 33 years old married male. I have completed drivers' certification course. I don't have any ticket or any conviction. I am going to buy new 2013 Hyundai Sonata GL. I shopped online and with brokers too. All are quoting me around $320 - 350. I haven't heard anything from TD yet as they wanted me to give them written application to get a quote from them. (I don't know why?). I know TD gives cheap quotes, but I need to know an estimate. After submitting written application, I have to wait 3-4 weeks to hear from them. Can anyone be able to tell me how much will be TD's quote? (at least an estimate?) Thank you in advance!!!""

""I'm under GEICO in NJ. If every member of the family is insured, how much cheaper w/ safe driving course?

Three members in the family. How much cheaper will insurance get if we all take the Safe-Driving Course?

How Long Is A Car Insurance Quote Good For?

wanted to know

Does www.canyonlandsaz.com have the best auto insurance rates?

Does www.canyonlandsaz.com have the best auto insurance rates?

What is the cheapest form of auto insurance?

What is the cheapest form of auto insurance?

Why should the government force us to buy car insurance?

If its wrong for the government to force us to buy health insurance, is it also wrong for the government to force us to buy car insurance? I mean.... in both cases, if you don't have insurance and something goes wrong somebody else is going to have to pay for it.""

What kind of coverage do I need for my motorcycle insurance during storage months? It has a lien on it.?

I kind of already figured that I need to keep the full coverage. I guess what I wanted to ask is what parts of the coverage can I take off while the bike is in storage? Or can I just set all of it to the minimum? My coverage by the way is 140 a month.

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/spalding-michigan-cheap-car-insurance-quotes-zip-49886-lisa-lowman/"

[anothergirlrecovering]

Lynn 57 yesterday

I came in and sat down on her couch after using the bathroom. She asked how I'm doing and I said OK. She sat down and ask how my weekend was and I said this was not my week. She asked what happened and I said I wrote a list but that I would try to be quick about it. I first told her about the situation yesterday with the noise machines. Lynn was confused and kind of like what the heck noise machines everybody just gets used to it once you hear them and it's like they're not even there anymore except for they block the sound. I was like I mean I get that I don't know why they don't get that. I told her about how I almost had a panic attack thinking I saw Erin and home I realized that at some point I seriously need to deal with that because I don't know what I would've done if it had actually been Erin. I told her about Thanksgiving and how I was looking forward to it and being able to have a few days off but that now am I'm not as much because of what my husband's mom said and that I hate feeling like I'm a burden to his family and that there's pressure on me simultaneously to create traditions and enjoy it. I asked Lynn if it was bad that I wanted a traditional Thanksgiving meal and Lynn was like no but basically that I need to recognize that there are some solutions here because we can always do Cracker Barrel Thanksgiving with his mom and then have our own Thanksgiving meal at home after or just not go or invite his mom to our apartment which I was like there's not enough room and she was like well you can still do it basically LOL. I explained how I felt like it would be easier if we had a house because then I could say that we could host it for a change since it's too much work on her but also that his mom doesn't really like coming over the mountain to visit.  Lynn explained that this is something that my husband and I probably really need to get on the same page about because all of this becomes exponentially harder once you throw kids into the mix. She said once I have kids she knows me and she knows that I will be a mama bear and it will be good to have talked through these things ahead of time. She said that she's had several clients and friends over the years who essentially given ultimatum their husbands and say either we have it here or I'm not going. She explained how I bend of the day my husband's mom just wants to spend time with us and we can still do that and do the Cracker Barrel thing and do our own meal and enjoy the traditions elsewhere or after. She also explained home basically this is something about his mom's personality that will probably never change which is why it's so important for us to be on the same page now and that ultimately he should be defending me as his wife because if I'm saying that I'm feeling like I'm burdening his family that's not OK. She said how her dad is still nitpicks about her husband and it's been 23 or 24 years and I was like wait you don't know and she laughed and was like 23 I think 23 it will be 24 years next year I'm just getting excited for 25 and I'm rushing it but I want to get to 25 and go on a fun adventure. She explained how she has a different perspective than me because she's been married for so long now and that when she looks back she wishes she had done things differently when she was my age and was young and in her 20s. She pointed out that when she was young she was terrified of divorce so there was things that she would never have said but now she wishes she had and that they could've worked through them then. She said now at this point in life she is quick to be like here's what's going on and if this doesn't change I'm OK with leaving because at this point she was like when you hit my age you realize that half  of your friends are divorced and you don't deserve to put up with certain things and you realize divorce isn't the end of the world and what are men in middle age most afraid of? Being left. She laughed and ask if I am have ever worked with any middle-aged men and she said how funny it is how it kind of changes because middle-age men really really struggle with this idea of being left in mid life and that's probably part of why they get remarried so quickly is because they don't want to be alone. She explained how while me venting about it might help me feel better in the moment it really won't fix anything long term and she brought up how it would be great if I could get my husband to go to therapy with me for couples counseling and just talk about how we need to get on the same page, not necessarily that we need to talk about the eating disorder or his anxiety or his issues with his mom or whatever. I explained have a check would be actually getting him to go because he does not want to go. I also told her about how we ate at Moes and he got super anxious and then I was glad that he recognized that he was being triggered but that it was hard and I told her that I'm also at the end of My period And she laughed and said she was wondering if that might be the case making me more sensitive to some of these things and I said yes and I've taking the Prozac every day, which she laughed and said good. She pretty much just said to try to suggest counseling again and to wait on good timing to bring it up and hopefully he will be receptive so that we can work through things together and be on the same page about some of the big things like finances and holidays and whatnot. She pointed out that as I'm sure I've seen in my practice to, there are a lot of couples that struggle with figuring out holidays and family situations especially being a family therapist. I said I knew she was right and it'll be fine it's just frustrating. She brought up the idea of compromise and I said that my idea of compromise was the fact that I'm running a 5K on Thanksgiving instead of watching the parade LOL. She mentioned that this is something that if we married for life then I will be dealing with for the rest of my life and I was like thanks Lynn and she laughed and was like well it's true. She also mentioned something about cooking and I was like do you not like to cook Lynn because she said how she cooks for her in-laws and she was like well I think I just normally have so many rods in the fire that it's hard to keep track of everything and I always end up burning something so not really but she said she used to like the top Chef shows and Food Network which I was like oh my God do you know who Chef Alex is? She was like no I don't think so and I was like hold on let me just show you because she's totally your doppelgänger and I pulled up a picture and she was like oh yeah I can see that and she did remember who she was she just hasn't watched in a long time. I told her that she's my favorite chef and always has been and that she reminds me so much of Lynn. She also mentioned town at some point Thanksgiving becomes more about the kids and then eventually she hopes that she will continue to do Thanksgiving and what not even when she slows down for when she has grandkids. I also told her about my dad texting me about natural remedies for the thyroid. I explained how I felt ashamed and how my parents would be so disappointed knowing I take Prozac once a month, let alone if I had to take a daily pill for my thyroid. Lynn was basically like you could just not tell them, which is true, but I explained how I would still feel guilty.

At some point Lynn's phone went off that she got a text and she was like why is that your phone or mine and I was like that was definitely yours and she was like hold on let me turn it off. She was like otherwise I'm probably going to get a whole bunch. She asked if I had heard about the ACT blunder and I was like no and she was like oh well they are in validating my sons high school scores and also another county and basically saying that there was a cheating situation and how it is just really bad because it affects scholarships for people. She said that her son is one point away from a certain scholarship and she was like but honestly even if he doesn't get his test back because this is the last time that he can test for it he would have the ability to apply for loans and have those resources but there are some people who are completely out of options and they are literally waiting on the scores to see if college is even going to be an option for them because of the scholarships. I told her about my client he got a 34 and she was like well what county are they and she was like well don't tell them but there's a potential that nobody's test scores from that time would count. She said the Washington Post just got involved so they are hoping for some national attention. She said that she hopes that they will just do away with the entire AC T and SAT and make it optional and that way the people who get 34th and 35 can submit and everyone else can just ignore it LOL. I told her if it made her feel better, the equivalent of my ACT was a 19 so there's some evidence that you don't have to necessarily do well on the ACT to succeed in life LOL to my surprise Lynn said that she only got a 20 so I guess I was in good company and I laughed and said oh so you weren't really good at it either and she was like no but didn't you have anxiety or something and I was like yeah and two of my sections didn't even count. She said when she took it everybody only took the test once and that was it or is like with her son this was his sixth time taking it and they hired a tutor for him and everything because they were hoping to get his test scores up that one point so that he could get scholarship. She said she thinks he will be OK either way and he's looking at I think she said Sarah Lawrence College which is kind of an art school and they will probably accept him either way. I think at that point she kind of realized that she was off on a tangent and she was like well anyway back to you and I was like well I hope that they validate your sons scores and that he makes the higher score for scholarships. She said thanks and she hope so too.

I told her about how I went to that luncheon and how you could tell that everybody there was looking around at what everybody was eating and just being Judgy and how I held my bladder because I didn't want to go to the bathroom and have anybody suspect that I was purging and then I finished my plate even though I didn't really like the squash because I didn't want there to be any room for anyone to think that I was restricting. Lynn was like is that really what you're supposed to do in that setting and I was like no ideally you would practice mindful eating and stop when your fall or if you don't like something and go to the bathroom if you have to go to the bathroom and under most circumstances I would do that, but not in that type of setting where I know people are going to be looking for behaviors like that. I told her about the good conversation that I had with my old therapist and how it felt so good knowing that he was treating me like an actual professional instead of like how that nutritionist made me out to be somebody incompetent. She pointed out that this is a really interesting phenomenon that I've described with in the eating disorder community where she was like this would never happen with something like alcoholism where that would be like if a alcoholic had gotten sober and became a therapist and if all the other treatment providers were treating them differently because it's like oh you were one of them. She mentioned the idea of writing about it and trying to get something published with in their journal about how difficult it can be having recovered from an eating disorder and being in those settings. I explained how I think what is hard and makes it unique from other  addictions and disorders is the fact that with drugs or alcohol you can just stop and then you are considered sober but with eating issues everything is so gray that I mean you have to eat and there's not a very clear definition of what recovery is in the field can't really agree on what recovered means and whether or not it's just the absence of symptoms and to what extent those symptoms need to be gone and whether or not if you have an occasional thought of purging with that mean you are not recovered? It's just very up in the air. She said that made sense and she hadn't thought of it that way but that it's still a very interesting phenomenon. She pointed out that as she said many times she isn't an eating disorder specialist and won't ever be and has no interest in pursuing that further and I was like LOL I mean thanks? And she was like you know what I mean not that I don't care but that you can only really focusing on so many areas and then have general knowledge of all the other ones which is why we don't focus on the eating disorder stuff in here and I was like yeah I get that it was just the way yo and won't ever be and has no interest in pursuing that further and I was like LOL I mean thanks? And she was like you know what I mean not that I don't care but that you can only really focusing on so many areas and then have general knowledge of all the other ones which is why we don't focus on the eating disorder stuff in here and I was like yeah I get that and she was like you know I specialize in trauma and so that's why I focus all of my conferences and studying in. She questioned about recovery rates and I was like honestly recovery with eating disorders is pretty low anyway. She mentioned that Merrick every story is really unique and she laughed and said that I need to figure out how to treat eating disorders and how EMDR was sort of created on a whim and it has revolutionized how we treat trauma so I need to do the same with eating disorders LOL I was like no small task here Lynn and she laughed and said that someone's got to do it. She mentioned feeling that with the way that I am it makes her think that at least for me the eating disorder is sort of a branch of obsessive-compulsive anxiety disorders and I was like yeah and not being able to tolerate difficult feelings and she was like well but I think it's more than that she started talking about plasticity and children's brains who are more from birth on inclined to have those obsessive compulsive traits. She said how her son actually has OCD and that he's always had those obsessive-compulsive trades even as a baby and they were wondering if he was going to be on the spectrum and she was like and I mean I don't know maybe he's a little bit on the spectrum now but he's always been that way and she was saying how I've probably also always had those patterns developed into my brain as a little kid. I said that made sense and I told her that that was the end of my list of things going on.

She said that she didn't think we had much time left which I was like fuck I wasted all that time on my stupid list but it is what it is. She asked me how I was feeling about the stuff we had worked on last time. I explained how when I think about it briefly probably like a one but if I like really think about it that's probably more like at four and she was like well that would be the goal though because if you have to really think about something or to prod emotion that's not good. Which I didn't mean necessarily that like if I sit there and ruminate about it and really try to put myself in it, I just meant more or less that if I just casually think of it it's not like terribly overwhelming but if I actually pause and think about what actually happened it does bother me more but whatever the case I said that being in the car would be at four but the initial thing we were working on which would be when I was actually sick and I'm asking my mom if I can, grandma, that's a one. So then she asked what keeps it at one and I was like honestly I really don't now and she was like do you get a feeling in your body and I was like well yeah anxiety in my chest and she was like well then she was like what do you think would make it go down to a zero and I was like honestly I don't really know. I said that I wished I knew and she was like well you know the process and how this all works and with blocking believes and what not and my guess would be if we keep getting all these memories down to a one there must be some sort of blocking believe they're so help be out, what is it? And instantly I felt like I was going to cry and I asked if she was frustrated with me. She said now and that she was just trying to figure it out because sometimes as a therapist she isn't always on the right track and she just wants to figure out the best direction to help me and she asked why and I said I don't know I just thought that you were getting frustrated with me for a minute and she was like no i'm really not. I said OK and we talked about can I be OK with the one and I was like I mean I'm not but I can learn to deal with it and she was like well the goal would be to except it eventually or to figure out what stopping it from being a zero. I was like yeah and she was like what is it that makes it feel like a one and I was like I don't know I guess just that like when I think about it I do feel sad and she was like well then we can start with that next time and I was like OK. I ended up explaining how I don't deal with conflict well and how like after the sound machine issue yesterday now I just want to check out and not talk to any of them ever again which I know is terribly unhealthy and I was like I don't know I just like don't really do well with conflict and when people are upset and Lynn was like yeah I know you don't LOL and I was like I know but I don't know how to fix that. She wrote something down and I was like OK and she said we would work on these things.

I paid her and I scheduled the two weeks out session. I told her I need to find my debit card and she was like oh no that's not good and I was like yeah common struggle for me. I told her that I wished I was better with the float back and she told me to remind her of that next session and we can try to work with it. I explained how I've just literally never been able to do it and I have a teenager who is able to do it with literally every single negative belief. She wished me safe travels and a happy Thanksgiving and I was like dear Evan Hansen will be in the parade and she was like oh my gosh really well I'm going to watch it and I was like yes! She said that her daughter tried out to be Zoe last week and they don't know if she'll get a call back or anything but it was cool for her to get to try out an audition and I was like what that is literally the coolest thing ever I'm so jealous so cool and she was like I know I'm so excited and I was like ugh lol and I headed out.