#i havent been able to do this since nursing school started

[jujuistrulyoutrageous]

hello, my beauty ...

#reading for fun #i havent been able to do this since nursing school started #pamela anderson #memoir #am reading #omg so excited

[stellarune]

ok but

we all love human aus

and high school aus

so i raise you

elwin, who is the school nurse, and his husband, huz, who is the school therapist

keefe, who has been coming in more and more often over the weeks to see elwin

he isnt injured, or sick, he just. comes in, grab and blanket and sleep on one of the cots

or sometimes on the floor, even though there are free cots

and obviously, elwin is worried, because this 16 years old kid, who he sees everyday because he says hello and goodbye, and sometimes needs a place to hide or an alibi after a prank just. doesnt do that anymore. bot really

he looks exhausted, and elwin has tried to talk to him about it to know if hes sleeping ok, if hes not working himself too hard, but he never got an answer jeefe just flashing him a smile and coming up with some excuse

he wants to help, but hes afraid that if hes just straightforward with him keefe would lose the safespace that is the infirmary and he doesnt want to take that away from him.

one day, keefe walks in, not saying hello, just looking particularily rough, deep bags under his eyes, blotchy skin like hed been crying.

he falls face first into the cot, and elwin can see he isnt sleeping, still.

and he wants to do as he said he would to let h come at his own pace, and all that, but fuck he looks like he really needs a hug

elwin sits down on the cot, and keefe pushes himself up to sit besides him.

"do you want a hug ?" keefe nods and buries his face in elwins chest, who holds him tight for as long as he needs to.

keefe doesnt talk about why this is happening, but from then on, he just goes straight to hug elwin if he needs it (and elwin isnt like,helping someone) (if he is, keefe just crashes on the bed, and elwin comes to see if he needs like, cuddles or something as soon as hes done)

(just. parental elwin ok)

if he needs to be with someone, because on a whim, elwin gave him a key to the infirmary

he hopes keefe doesnt have to use it outside of school, but sometimes you gotta be prepared for the worst, and he still doesnt know exactly what is going on

keefe doesnt talk much about anything when hes in the infirmary, just dozes off so

anyways, he meets lord and lady sencen during the aprent teacher thing, and everything clicks

he runs into them in a hall, while theyre talking about just how bad keefe did that year, only "scraping a 97 in some classes" and he doesnt know exactly what these people have been telling keefe but hes this close to punching them right then and there

he makes a point of letting keefe know just how smart his teachers knew him to be, and that most of them didnt mind him not being in class if he was bored, as long as he did the tests and turned in his assignments, which he did

also how all the pranks that had been pulled on alina had become a running joke amongst them. how she was the only one who didnt know it was keefe pulling the pranks, but everyone else found them hillarious

fintan, bronte tiergan prentice come in sometimes as well

fintan is deseperatly trying to get keefe back on his play, prentice finds keefe to be the only one worthy to talk with him about art, and bronte and tiergan are just here by proxy

(and to keep their husband/brother in check)

(they went to school with keefes parents, and honestly theyre all this close to coming beat thel up in their sleep, but fintan and prentice are just a bit closer to actually dping it)

one day, what elwin really didnt want to hapen happened. keefe was already ther when he opened the infirmary

he could have just come in eatly or whatever, but he was wearing the exact same clothes as the day before

and he knew keefe had friends that would take him in if he asked them to, but he also knew keefe probably didnt want them to know somethi g had hapened

"do you want to caome stay with me ?" he asks when keefe blinks awake.

he didnt really mind keefe sleeping in the infirmary, even though it was proably forbidden by the school or whatever, but the cots were kinda uncomfortable

hes surprised keefe agrees

he drives them to the sencens first, so keefe can grab clothes, phone, laptop, and anything else he needs, then to his place

thankfulky he has a guest bedroom

keefe seriously cannot stop thanking him and he really doesnt need to elwin tells him, he offered after all, and he wouldnt have done so if he didnt want keefe to be there

what was probably supposed to be a few days turns into a month, then two, and honestly elwin doesnt mind (at all)

just, lzt this boy heal in peace

gisela wants to get him back, though, after a while

and she would have the upper land, both legally and emotionally if keefe sisnt just straight up refuse to see her

and she knows she doesnt have that many chances to win a lawsuit if keefe hadnt been home in 2 months and is testifying againt them

so yeah, elwin just recieves a bunch of death threats, but he can deal with that, and he has cameras installed that send a live feed to his friend tinker wjo lives a few states away so he feels pretty safe knowing they wouldnt be able to destroy the tapes

keefe doesnt come in to the infirmary nearly as much these days, and he looks less tired as well

he joins the school play, and prentice reports that hes been using the art room a bunch as well

fintan helps him prank alina again

bonus :

the first time keefe calls elwin dad was as a joke

"okayo daddy-o"

neither of them aknowledge it , but they bith know it happe.ed and honestly they arent mad about it

the moment it really starts to be a Thing for them though, is the next year, at the parent teacher conference, when keefe gives him the invite.

"you know, since.... youre basically my dad now."

"ill be there son"

keefe sends him a 10 hour loop of the "you are my dad" vine for fathers day

they dont really bother with guardianship, because keefe will be 18 the year after, and his "parents" havent tried anything in months

even the threats stopped

elwin definitely walks keefe dosn the aisle

#kotlc #keefe sencen #elwin #kotlc headcanon #look im #soft for parental elwin #is that a tag ? #parental elwin #hes the onfirmary dad #vague implied abuse #just the gisela and assius stuff #and also death threats but real quick #the others arent in this just mentione #also very background #tiertice #pyren bros

[harmacytechnician]

Okay hi thank you for even letting me ask you about this lol! I’ll get straight to the point because long ask ahead but my question is how much do references matter (in the context of retail pharmacy) because I don’t have any 😭 or will they even ask me for some just because I know old friends of mine have gotten cashiering jobs without them during hs. Context: I graduated high school during the pandemic. i never worked because throughout hs even during summers i focused on school and summer class programs and everything to end up not going to college even though i worked rly hard during hs because i had a pandemic thinking about life moment and realized that i couldn't, probably shouldn't, and so i wouldn't go to college for the stem major i was rly keen on despite how uncomfortably crucial of a decision i was making for personal reasons! One of those reasons is that I did end up getting sick both physically and mentally (not covid, but led to isolating myself so i have no friends or teachers etc as a reference to put down) then I ended up stuck recovering at home since I was susceptible to getting a bad case of covid and sooo i’ve had 2+ years stuck inside to think and look online about what I might want to do and remembered that other majors i did apply for were medical related and one was even specifically just pharmaceutical sciences. I still dont feel comfortable even going to community college yet and just feel like becoming a pharmacy technician would fit w/ me rn because i personally just want to work and the healthcare + continued education aspect interests me as im thinking of going to community college for maybe nursing in 2-3 years from now. I promise im not like irresponsible i still have old physical teacher references but i feel rude if i had to put or give those down when i havent kept in touch and wouldnt feel comfortable contacting them just for a job i want, like i swear im the most boring straight A overachiever goody two shoes type of person that just likes to help people so the job genuinely interests me also this is so long im so sorry 😭 😭

Thank you for taking the time to type all that out and give me some info for reference!

My answer is that I don't think references are all too important, depending on the situation.

My experience is different from most people, to be honest. I went to college to become a technician (it's like a year-long program, not a degree or anything, it took me way longer than a year but I had extenuating circumstances), and part of the program is doing an externship (basically an internship, the school sends students to practice working in actual pharmacies and learn the basics). The pharmacy I did my externship at really liked me and thought I was very good at the work I was doing, so they hired me as soon as my externship ended even though I wasn't certified (I'm still not certified but that's another story and I'm currently gearing up to take the exam since I just finished the final class I needed to take). Now, I've been an employee for over a year!

This sort of situation is not the norm. I lucked out big time. Obviously I earned the job by being excellent at what I do, but I was also fortunate enough that the pharmacy was hiring at that time and wanted to take a chance on someone with no real experience.

If you don't want to do a formal program through a school to become a tech, there are still ways to do it. I can only really speak to how Walgreens does it because that's the only pharmacy I'm familiar with, though.

The way it works at Walgreens that I've seen a couple people go through now is that they were initially hired on as cashiers. Then, when the pharmacy needed more help, they talked to the store manager about starting the process of becoming a tech. First you get your pharmacy assistant license (you literally just fill out a form and pay a small fee and then you get it), and then you can start training. You have to take classes through Walgreens and complete a curriculum, but to my knowledge it's all online. During that time, you work in the pharmacy and learn how to do things, getting experience and whatnot. Then, once you complete the program, you're able to take the exam to get your license. To my knowledge, the people I've seen go through this path didn't really have any relevant references. They just talked to the manager about wanting to do it.

Some of this information might also be specific to Washington state, I think most places are similar but there may be small differences depending on your state's particular laws.

I imagine that you'd want the same sort of references as you would have to apply to any job. If you don't have any references at all it might be harder to get your foot in the door, but not impossible. Some places really need the people, so they'll go out on a limb for people who appear to have drive and passion for it. There's a lot of factors the play into it such as the current demand and, honestly, luck.

It would be a lot easier to become a technician if you did a formal program through a school, but that's not feasible for everyone. If it is possible for you I'd recommend it, because you'll learn things in a technician program that you won't learn just jumping into it at the pharmacy level (I know something that really trips up some people who started as cashiers and not students is medical terminology, for example).

Honestly, I really feel for you. I had to drop out of university due to poor mental and physical health. I wanted to become a psychiatrist or doctor of some sort, but it just wasn't possible so I had to change gears and that's when I decided to go to community college to become a technician.

If you have any other questions about anything related to retail pharmacy and/or pharmacy technician stuff, feel free to send an ask my way and I'll try to answer it to the best of my ability! I don't know if this answer really helped much at all because it does kind of boil down to "it depends", which isn't super useful. fdlkfjkl

[sloven5905115]

Summer Time Chp. 2  Here Cums the Girls

Well as I was checking out the bank lines and waiting for Mark to return I reflected on just what had happened.I would have never imagined the feelings I had at that moment.I didnt know if I was gay or what but I couldnt deny that what me and Mark had done was probably the greatest thing I have ever done in my short life.As I sat there nursing my beer I relived the feeling of Marks cock in my mouth, hard yet velvety at the same time.And then the way Mark took me in the ass for the first time of my life.What ever happened next I knew that this would always be a time that I would remember for the rest of my life.Just as I was about to drift off to sleep I heard the unmistakable sound of Marks pickup, I got up to climb up the side of the river bank to help him carry the stuff down to the camp site.When I realized that Mark wasnt alone.He had brought his sister, Becky and her friend Karen.Now a little bit about the girls, both were 15 at this time and were basically glued at the hip, there was a lot of rumors going around about if the girls were lesbians.While both were about 52 , 53 with Karen being the taller by just the slightest amount.And since they were on the school track team they were about 115 lbs and rock solid physiques.Becky had a set of abs that most guys would love to have.Karen was black shoulder length hair with about large B cups with legs to die for, and Becky had strawberry hair that she kept fairly short and her breast were just a little bit larger than Karens.

Becky bounced out of the pickup and waved her arms at me shouting hi Jimmy,hows the fishing.I dont know why but I just hated being called Jimmy and Becky knew it but would say it all the time just to rub it in.So I gave her a hurt scowl look and she came up to me with that puppy dog look and kissed me on the cheek.Usually this is as far as it goes, it was becoming a private game between the two of us, but this time instead of saying there, there Jim it will be alrightshe surprised me by reaching around and grabbing my ass and whispering in my ear Mark told me everything.

I must have looked like I had be hit by a cattle prod at that news.I couldnt believe that Mark would have told anyone at all about what had happened earlier.For a minute I felt betrayed and hurt but, Becky leaned to my ear and said ‘not to worry stud Mark and I share every thing.At this she stepped back with a serious shit eating grin and I stood there looking like a dork, I was completely confused.She had never acted that way toward me, I used to be the neighbor hood geek now she was calling me stud.And what the hell was this share every thing shit.But before I could say anything Mark and Karen came up to us carrying some ice and more beer.

Well Jim did you catch any fish. asked Mark

I dont know about fish but if Jim doesnt close that mouth of his, hell sure as hell catch some flies. laughed Karen as they walked by.

Oh, by the way there is some food in the truck Jim why dont you get it for us. Mark said over his shoulder.

So, after I got the food and came down to the camp site I say Mark sitting next to Karen and Becky was on the other side of the fire and patted the ground next to her.Not being one to disappoint a lady I sat down next to Becky and she leaned on my shoulders.Now I know what most of you will think that the first thing I noticed was her tits or something like that, but, I just couldnt get passed how good this girl smelled.It wasnt overly perfumed or anything like that just a good clean smell.Well after a minute Becky looked up to me and said that this was the point when I was supposed to put my arm around her and hold her.I smiled down at her and held her.Even though me and Mark had just fucked holding Becky was just something that I knew I could get used to.Where Mark was hard teenage muscle Becky was firm but not too hard and her skin was so much softer.Well we sat there talking about school, summer and about anything else we could think of, and of course drinking beer.After a while Karen got up and grabbed Mark by the hand and led him off.

Now I wonder where those two are off to.I asked Becky.

She grabbed hold of my face and said to give us some privacy silly.At which she leaned forward and kissed me.I was a little shocked at first but, that lasted about a second and then I figured after what I had already done that to just go with the flow.So I reached around and held her and started to kiss her back.I guess in my eagerness I was to hard because the next thing I knew she pushed me back.whoa stud, when your kissing a girl you need to take your time.Just remember that ladies like to make love, guys like to fuck.So stud just take your time because we have all night.

I do have a question for you though.I said as I laid down next to her.

Whats that Jim

What did you mean when you said that you and Mark shared everything.

Well, lets just say that I havent been a very good girl.She said looking off into the distance.Im not sure why but all of a sudden Im kind of embarrassed by this.As she said that I sat up and looked at her with a confused look on my face and she reached up and grabbed my arm and said.Oh now Jim I dont mean you or this, its not you, its just , , , you see, , , well.Oh hell there isnt any easy way to say this so here it goes.Me and Mark have had sex together, it started one night we were kidding each other and he dared me to show him my pussy and I dared him to show me his cock.Well the next thing I know Im on my knees sucking him off and then he eats my pussy.Dont get me wrong he didnt rape me or anything it just kind of happened, but we have been doing it off and on since then.I even let him fuck me in the ass, good thing I was drunk that night or there is no way I would have done that, and I havent let him do it since.But there is one place he hasnt fucked me.

You mean your pussy is still cherry.I looked at her with disbelief, especially with everything that she had told me.

Yes it is, I know that this is going to sound silly but Ive had a crush on you for a long time.And I just knew that I wanted you to take my virginity.And when Mark fucked my ass that time I cried for a whole week knowing that I hadnt given you the chance.But you would hardly talk to me, so I thought that you didnt like me.After saying this she looked down and I knew she was about to start crying.

I lifted up her chin and gave her a pick on her forehead and told her Dont cry its partly my fault too.She looked at me with doubt and tears starting to form in the corner of her eyes.I thought that you didnt care for me and I was scared to ask you out. For fear that you would turn me down and make fun of me.

OH GOD, no Jim I wouldnt do that.I know that I have teased you in the past but that was child stuff and it will never happen again, I promise.Saying that she wrapped her arms around me and held on tight.After a moment I could hear her starting to quietly sob.I was so stupid to treat you that way, its all my fault.

As I was holding her close to me I said softly to her ear No its nobodies fault were just two young kids that didnt know what we were doing, but that is changed and now that we know how we feel toward each other things will be different.

Just hold me for now ok.

Sure anything that you want.So there we were two kids just holding each other after opening our hearts to each other.Now I know what your thinking what about what I had said to Mark, loving him and all that.At that time I wasnt really thinking of that, I figured that I would just have to sort that out later.After all Mark was probably fucking Karen right then at that moment.Then I felt Becky start to stir and rubbing her hand up and down my chest, I just laid back and enjoy the feeling then I felt her hand go for my waist band of my shorts.Reaching down I grabbed her hand and told her you dont have to do this to prove your feelings toward me.I dont want you to ever regret this moment.

She looked at me and it looked like she was about to cry again and I thought oh shit what did I say this time.Becky just looked at me and said that was the most beautiful thing you could say to me.I want to fuck you so much now you just dont know.She reached in my shorts and started to stroke my cock and said you know for being the cutest dork around you can say the smartest things.Smiling down at me she started to pull on my shorts so I help her out and took them off.Damn, not bad size and your young, I think with some care on my part it will grow some more.with that comment she leaned down and took my cock in her mouth.While Mark was able to take my cock completely in his mouth Becky was only able to take half before she started to gag and back off.But, what her mouth couldnt handle she stroked with her hand.So this is what making love feels like, I realized that what I thought was love with Mark was in reality just great sex between two guys.I looked down and watched her bob her head up and down on my cock and for a moment I could see a small tear running down her cheek but she wouldnt stop.I started to feel the sensation that told me I was about to cum so I put my hand on her head and told her, but she backed off and said no Jim I want this, I want all of it I never let Mark cum in my mouth but I want you everywhere.With that she returned to my cock and started to suck with more vigor.Then it hit me and I couldnt hold back anymore I arched my back and dug into the ground with my hands as I started to cum in Beckys mouth it must have been six or seven squirts and she tried to swallow it all but some came out of the corners of her mouth.I must have blacked out because the next thing I knew Becky was next to me with a look of contentment on her face.Welcome back to the living stud, you know Ive heard the other girls say how they like their boyfriends cum and now I know what they were talking about.

I gave her a big hug and told her well I guess its time for this gentleman to do his duty.with that I started to kiss my way down her neck and kissed her left nipple while I messaged her right breast.I kept nursing, for want of a better word, while stroking her body making a special effort to avoid her pussy area.I had read a story from Penthouse how that was supposed to drive a girl crazy and now I was going to find out if the guy knew what he was talking about. And so far it seemed like he did, because the more I suckled her breast and rubbed her body the more Becky started to squirm and beg me to touch her pussy.So finally I gave in and started to rub her pussy, at first I thought that she peed herself she was so wet.I kept working my way down kissing her everywhere, when I got to her belly button I put my tongue in and sucked.She jerked hard screaming how that wasnt fair to be making her feel like cumming and tickling her at the same time.But, I just smiled and kept on going, finally I got to her pussy.There was a muskiness to the smell but not bad I could get used to this, I thought.I ran my tongue up and down her slit and every once in awhile I would give her clit a suck.Then with outwarning my sweet petite Becky grabbed my hair on my head with the strength of a bull rider and clamped her legs around my head.For a minute I was wondering if she was going to let go but, then what a way to die LOL.Then all of a sudden she started to squirt her own juices in my mouth I tried to swallow but there was just too damn much fluid.

Finally she relaxed and I moved up and kissed her on her lips.Damn Jim where did you learn to do that, you been practicing on other girls.

NoI chuckled just a healthy dose of Penthouse Letters.

She cradled my head and stroked my hair and jokingly said Well thank God for pornography and maybe well have to write out own letter someday.But, first are you ready for the main event.

Are you sure.I mean I would love to but…..

Jimmy stop talking and get ready to make me your girlfriend, lover and best of all your woman.

You keep calling me that and Im going to have to spank you.

Promises, promises.she said laughing now lets get this done before I start thinking about it

Yes maam. with that I got between her legs and looked at her laying there.I moved up and placed my cock at her opening and started to move in when all of a sudden I hit something and she arched her back and put her hands on my chest.She was actually panting, I asked her if she was alright and if she wanted me stop.But she shock her head and said wait so I stayed in the same position and she said now.So I leaned into her.I could tell by her face that it was hurting her and was about to stop when all of a sudden I broke through.

Becky arched her back and screamed, OOOOOHHH GOD THAT HURTS.I was scared that I had done something wrong and started to pull out when she grabbed me and shouted for me to stop moving and just let her get used to it.So that is what we did and after a while I started to move in and out of her and she said that it was ok, and that it was actually starting to feel better by the minute.So I started to work myself in and out of her, her pussy felt so good around my cock that I never wanted out.I was thinking then that what I did with was Mark was nice but this was even better.So I kept up and I even started to pick up speed.Becky started to grind her pussy on my cock and telling me how good my cock felt in her pussy.Then all to soon that feeling came over me and I knew I was about to cum when I said I should pull out and not cum inside her, Becky wrapped her legs around me and said No you dont I want your cum inside me, dont you dare pull out Jim, if you do Ill never forgive you.So stop thinking and just fuck the shit out of me. Ooh God that feels better and better.Dont stop fucking me Im going to cu……with that she stiffened and I felt her juices on my cock and that sent me over the edge and I shot my load in her pussy.There we were two teenagers whose bodies were locked in a missionary position our bodies spasmingwith the pleasure of youth.Finally the feelings subsided and we parted and laid side be side and just sat there enjoying the afterglow of great sex.

It was only a couple of minutes when I heard noises and looked up and I saw Mark and Karen walking toward us.The first thing I noticed was that they were both naked and I could see cum running down Karens leg look Mark I think theyre finally doneKaren said with a smile on her face.

Yea they sure did take their time, for a minute I thought I was going to have to fuck you again.Mark joked while he had a finger in Karens ass.

Now stud that wouldnt be so bad would it.Besides the way she was screaming I wont be surprised if the sheriff doesnt show up.Hey Becky how about you let me have a go at Jim and see how he is. Karen asked Becky.

I dont think so Karen, at least not for awhile but right now I want to keep him all to myself and that means you big brother.You keep your hands off of him.Becky said while we were still laying on the ground with me on my back and her with her right arm and right leg draped over me.I do know one thing and that is I need to cool off.So Jim get your but up and lets jump into the river and cool off for awhile.

With that she stood up and grabbed my hand and led me off to the river.While heading to the water I heard Mark tell Karen What did I tell you

Youre right Mark they do look like a cute couple.But, you know what Im going to miss most.

Whats that Karen.

That sweet pussy of your sisters.

I looked at Becky and she just gave me that impish smile of hers and said Ill tell you laterI cant wait for that story

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[for-ests]

Always Enough- Peter Parker x Reader

Okay so this imagine was an anon request that I had previously posted, but I accidentally deleted. I didn't mean to, so here’s a re-upload. Happy finals & sorry my dumbass clicked the wrong button on tumblr mobile because im stupid

Summary (bc the request deleted w/ the post): The reader realizes she had been neglecting Peter because she was stressed over school. Peter thinks there might be another reason because she has become distant. Confrontation and angst follows!

Word count: 2, 360

✭♡✭♡✭♡✭

Finals were a killer, especially for a nursing major like yourself. The stress of it all made you want to curl up into a ball and cry. Cry for hours until you couldn't cry no more. 

But that wasn't an option. What you dreamed of becoming, something simple, yet incredibly difficult, was growing out of reach. Your hours of studying had led you nowhere, only to barely tangible grades. Grades that were barely above average. You were disappointed, discouraged, and running out of options.

What else would you do with your life? Becoming a nurse was the only thing you had ever wanted to be, it was all you knew. Ever since aliens rained in the sky, your only motive was to help the ones who couldn't help themselves. But how could you ever hope to do that when you couldn't pass biochem?

What didn't help your anxious mind was the house you had to stress over, and your minimum wage restaurant job that didn't add to your required expertise. Tears welled in your eyes as you remembered you had to lay a payment down on your ever-increasing student loans. Maybe college wasn't for you. Perhaps it was never meant to be. Your summer money was running out and fast.

Just breathe. You repeated. I don't have time to cry.

You could cry after you studied. And right now, you had barely glanced at your flashcards for more than ten minutes. It seemed like you were paralyzed, sitting in bed with your flashcards scattered around you, all of them laid out and waiting for involvement.

Just as you were about to pick up the first card, your phone buzzed beside you. Instinctively, you glanced at it, your heart dropping when you saw Peter's name flash across the screen.

Date. You had a date night, and you forgot.

"Fuck!" You cursed out loud, the tears you had tried so hard to control seeming to burst over your eyelids. How could you forget?

Peter: I'll be there in 15 minutes :D

You replied immediately, glancing at yourself in the phone's reflection. You looked terrible and distraught beyond compare.

Y/N: Peter…im so sorry I forgot, i'm not ready

Peter: oh

Y/N: i have a huge exam soon, maybe its for the best that we rain check? i'm sorry I know ive done this before but im really stressed about it

Peter: we havent talked for days, y/n, i think theres more going on than what youre telling me

Y/N: what? of course not wtf

Peter: im coming over anyways, ill be there soon

Y/N: why?

Peter: we have to talk.

Your heart dropped down to your stomach. Those words were what you had been dreading, and all focus you had managed to gather vanished into thin air. You knew you had been neglecting Peter's affections. Even if every fiber in your being wanted to make him the single most important thing in your life.

It had been almost a week since you'd seen him, and honestly, it was painful in the most innocent way.

But Peter didn't have to worry like you did. He was gifted and already had his entire life ahead of him, set in the middle of Stark industries. But you never asked for a handout, you never asked for help. Even though you knew he was the smartest young man around. You were proud to be his, and the thought of that disappearing was more detrimental to you that failing your upcoming exam.

Y/N: ok, front door is open

Tears were rolling down your cheeks at this point. You had been with Peter for over a year and had gone without seeing him for longer, but he was right. This time was different. This was the third date you had canceled without wanting to, but sometimes apologizing wasn't enough. Peter deserved a lengthy explanation of what you were really going through.

You were so used to holding back your emotions, that times like this were an occasional reoccurrence. You had always been so afraid of unloading your burdens onto others that you still sometimes forgot that having a boyfriend came with that perk. He was still going to love and cherish you if you asked for help and advice. Hell, you needed to realize that he wanted to.

That was a factor of why you were so in love with Peter. He always listened, and sometimes, even push the truth out of you when he could tell you needed it.

"You're already crying, huh." A sad smile was on Peter's face as he opened the door. His sudden appearance startled you, and you managed to chuckle despite the circumstances.

"You know me." You sniffled, immediately embarrassed by the state he had caught you in. Instinctively, you brushed your hair to the side and dabbed the tears from under your eyes. You could feel the remnants of Make-up drying to your skin.

"I didn't mean to ruin your study-"

"But we need to talk." You finished, shoving your school supplies to the edge of the bed. You made enough room, so he was able to sit comfortably.

Slightly embarrassed, you kept your gaze averted as best as you could. Just Peter's presence made your heart flutter, and a part of you was trying to prepare for the worst. You might really lose him this time. And for what? Yes, school was incredibly important, so, so important. But so was Peter, and you needed to find a balance.

Your silence was enough to beckon Peter's thoughts into the open.

"I just need to make sure you're still serious… about us." His voice was soft as if it was struggling to stay neutral.

Finally, gaining the courage to look at him, you locked eyes. Peter's gaze was heavy and forthcoming, and it took all of your willpower to swallow the knot in your throat.

"Of course, I am." The conviction was entirely evident in your tone. So much so, that Peter fell silent. His accusations seemed to die in his throat, but he knew that if he didn't get them out now, they would creep back to him later.

"It's hard to tell sometimes," Peter muttered, unable to gaze at your confused expression. You looked so hurt.

Your silence beckoned him to continue.

"I haven't properly talked with you in a week. You've canceled our last three dates… it seems like you never want to hang out with me anymore."

Peter winced. He was a grown man, and he sounded like a child. Yet, he had let so many things slide, hoping you would come around, hoping you would make it up to him. Perhaps he had been selfish to only think of himself in the relationship. He failed to realize that maybe in attempts to please him, you were putting your own future on the line. 

"I know you're going through a lot, but you can't even seem to talk about it." Peter's shoulders felt tense, his eyebrows knitting together in an agitated expression. His leg was bouncing up and down uncontrollably. He looked like he was about to burst.

"I'm sorry." You said, trying to swallow the knot in your throat. Pausing, you tried to gather your thoughts into cohesive sentences that would soothe his anxious mind.

"There's nobody else, right?" He suddenly blurted, actually turning his head to look at you. Insecurity was glazed in his eyes for the first time.

"Why would you even think that?" You said, startled. The question felt as if he had shoved your head underwater and held it there just long enough for you to choke on the liquid.

His expression was blank for the first time. Vulnerability at its finest. "My life isn't perfect, you know. I overthink just like you. I need reassurance."

Peter was so calm, so calm that it worried you. Though you were already afraid of how this conversation would go, it hurt you to realize that this conversation was the result of your actions. You failed to make Peter feel special like you had promised. Like he had promised you. Relationships go both ways, and for the last couple of weeks, it had only gone one.

"No, Peter. There will never be anyone else."

He sighed, relaxing slightly. "You've been acting weird. I don't really know what to think."

"I told you a billion times, I'm studying. After work, that's literally all I do. And I need to focus."

"I feel like there's more. It feels weird to not see a text from you when I wake up. It feels weird to not hear your voice. I don't… I don't like it, Y/N. Even if that's selfish."

And selfish it was. Peter expected you to be transparent while he was hiding possibly the biggest secret in the world. Maybe that was why he was so worried about how much you loved him. Peter wanted to be honest with you. He wanted you to know he was spider-man, but right now, he still couldn't bring himself to. Perhaps he was looking for a reason.

"I'm sorry." Your hands were clenched in your lap. "I've never had to deal with this before. Everything is so new, even if we've been together for a year. I've never cared about anyone like this, and I can't manage my time."

Peter paused as if every word in this conversation pained him to no end. His eyes were glossy, his mind unclear. He was desperately trying to understand why you were isolating himself. "You can't make any time for me?"

"That's the thing, I can't focus on anything else when I'm with you." Your lip quivered. "And that's a problem."

"It's not for me." He said quickly. "I make time for you, and you don't for me. And you need to tell me why."

You glanced away, embarrassed. No matter what you said, the reason wouldn't be good enough. You were just a bad girlfriend.

Peter reached his hand out and pulled you to him. You rested your chin upon his shoulder, soothed to feel his warmth once again. "You need to tell me, Y/N. We've made it work for this long, and all of a sudden, it stopped."

Your body started to shake. Trying to muffle your sob, you brought your hand to your mouth. It was all too much.

"-You have your whole life together, Peter. I have nothing, I still have to work for it. I'm not as smart as you, I'm-"and that's when the tears started to flow. It was a literal flood, tear after tear poured over your eyelids until they were bloodshot, until pressure pounded through your head.

Before you could finish, your face was pressed against Peter's chest. He held you tightly, his sweatshirt dabbing up your tears of sorrow. You gripped tightly to him, releasing the stress that had been building up inside of you for the last two weeks.

He did not know what else to do. Showing you that he loved you seemed like the most viable option. Sometimes all you had to do was listen, and that was enough.

"I got a bad grade on my midterm exam, one that I didn't study for because I spent my time with you—I thought-"

"Shh." He stroked your hair, understanding what you meant without a complete explanation.

"I work so hard, and it's never enough-"

"It's always enough, Y/N."

"I got so caught up in it that I neglected you in the process. So much so that you thought I was cheating on you" you inhaled sharply, whimpering against him, so many different emotions swirling through your mind. "You're the best thing in my life, and I put you second…"

"Look at me, Y/N." He cupped your cheeks in a swift movement, forcing you to look at him through tear-filled eyes. "You are enough for me. That's why I bothered to have this conversation with you. That's why I care." He pressed his lips against your forehead. "I love you."

"I love you too, Peter." You tilted your head up to kiss him wholly on the lips. You were a mess, but Peter had always told you that you looked beautiful when you cried.

"Rosy cheeks." He whispered, patting down your hair, inhaling your scent, and appreciating the beauty you constantly radiated.

You chuckled, sniffling loudly. Peter always said that after you had a successful mental break down, your cheeks brandished a rosy shade.

"Shut up." You whispered, tightening your grip around his torso. His back fell against your bed, and you shifted to lay completely on top of him. The firmness of his chest underneath you caused instant relaxation, instant relief. Maybe, just maybe, being in his presence was enough to get rid of the stress from everyday life.

The corners of your eyes were raw and red, yet it complimented your shade. Peter vowed from the moment he had met you, that he would never let any harm come to you. The last thing Peter had ever expected was that he might be the reason, instead of the world.

At least, for now, he had the power to fix it. You were the love of his life, and he had never felt so gratified to be in anyone else's presence.

Peter's fingers traced light, small circles on your back. He could hear your heartbeat slow. The softness of your finger against his was enough to help him close his eyes.

He was at peace, real peace for the first time in weeks.

"We need to remind ourselves to talk about shit more." You mumbled sleepy, almost inaudible. "So this doesn't happen again, because I hate it."

"Me too, babe." He whispered, content with watching you rise and fall in sync with his breathing.

"I couldn't bear to lose you."

#tom holland x reader #peter parker x reader #peter parker fanfiction #peter parker imagine #peter parker

[drunknihilist]

How’s My Life? I don’t know I Never Really Had One.

I was born in 1990, from 93 to 98 I was raised middle class in the country. Anything I wanted my dad bought it for me because he worked at Goodyear. My mother turned my word upside down from 98 to 2002 when she told me he wasn’t my real father and she was divorcing him. She wound up cheating on him and moving me in with an alcoholic former marine that locked me in a walk in closet for 4 years and for 3 of them when he wasn’t beating me I was his boyfriend and he never worked. 

If I chewed my fingernails he beat me. If I didn't turn the light switch off before I left a room he beat me. If he caught me trying to sneak food out of the fridge he beat me. He shattered a flashlight over my head for bringing home a bad report card in front of my mother. He gave me a handjob with my pants on while my mom was sitting in front of me a few times and even though she looked me in my eyes she didn't say a word just kept watching television. He made me read porn magazines and watch pornographic films with him since I was 9 years old. He would make me hold his cock when he went to the bathroom to take a piss. I would wake up to him in the middle of the night having sex with me so I start sticking objects inside of myself thinking that if I stretched out the area that maybe I would be able to handle it more easier. There were even times where I would feel unusually tired between 5-7 in the evening which was around the same time he was taking me on these gun shooting trips with a man named George Reynolds and I have my suspicions that he was giving me drugs and letting him have sex with me when I was passed out. He stuck loaded guns to my head threatening to kill me if I told any of my teachers about it. So I was kept in solitary confinement and fed one or two meals a day to keep me alive so they could get my SSI check in the mail to buy beer with it.

I spent my 8th grade year living at my grandmothers house away from all the abuse and I actually made the honor roll. So my mom leaves him and meets my little brothers dad and talks me into moving in with her again and I spend 03 to 06 repeatedly getting grounded while his family bullied and beat me so they could get my SSI check in the mail and buy more beer with it. To make matters worse when we had to move out of a place in west logan his daughters left my belongings on the property after they moved their stuff out and the property owner threw all of my stuff in the garbage. The only thing I had to my name was the clothes on my back and I didn't even know that it happened until my mother called me and told me about it.

Then I told my grandmother I had enough and I want to move in with her she welcomed me with open arms. I actually went to the dentist for once because my mother never took me in the past ten years and I figured out I had 11 cavities in my mouth. I didn’t know how to interact socially around people so the friends that I did manage to make became a second family to me. So from 06 to 08 I was more focused having a social life and having two short term relationships than I was on my school work so I barely even graduated high school.

A woman that I wanted to marry that I spent 9 months with off and on and I lost my virginity to told me to meet her across town so that she could go back to my grandmothers house to meet my uncle in the basement for a quickie out of revenge for me breaking up with her multiple times and only got caught because my step sister walked in on the two of them so I spent the end of 08 to 2010 getting a lot of casual encounters out of my system trying to forget about her but nothing made me feel better.

From 2010 to 2012 I tried to get a job but I have had such an emotionless thousand yard stare that it was like trying to give a job interview to a robot. So when nobody would hire me a friend of mine named David was paying me a little bit of money working and training me as an contractor plus I also got a second job because a man name Charles who was running a business in the back of his place said that he needed a second locksmith. My grandmother kept getting sick so I began to spend more time taking care of her than I was showing up where I needed to be. David replaced me with another coworker and they ended up opening their own business and Charles ended up relocating out of state.

Here I am 22 years old I’m broke and I have to be a caregiver to my grandmother. Boy I could really use a friend, but as months went by nobody called me, texted me, came by the house. It got to where I was so depressed I checked myself into a mental health facility for a week to try to cope with my situation. Then when I got home I decided I love my grandmother dearly but I need to leave this town. I ended up leaving early in the morning to catch a bus and my grandmother talked to me on the phone thinking that I was a son of a bitch and she doesn't have anyone that's going to take care of her. So I had family who lived in a different state that took me in and I got a job working as a telemarketer. My uncle back home ends his own life and none of my family is helping my grandmother with emotional support so I have to move back for over half a year. I go back out of state again and another uncle gets me a job working as a maintenance man. However he cannot stop his addiction to pain pills so whenever he got done blowing his paycheck he was always wanting me to give him most of mine. Then one day I put my foot down and said I’m not doing this for you anymore and he told lies to my boss and got me fired.

I got a job working as a caregiver under the table for a lady who lived across the street from me because all of her family was thousands of miles away. So 400 dollars a month was a lot better to me than nothing. And at this point I was taking turns being a caregiver for my neighbor, grandmother and the aunt I was living with. My aunt has MS and I had two cousins that were in their mid to late 30's that never lifted a finger to do dishes or clean house I was stuck doing all the house work for free and whenever I am not in Logan and I'm back home I'm still expected to do it.

I have to regularly travel back and forth to my grandmothers house because whenever I call her she says she doesn’t eat for days sometimes because even though my mom lives in the house directly behind her she cannot come over and cook 2-3 times a day. It’s not like my mother works because now that she is single she keeps my little brother in the house just like she did to me most of my life while she plays games and spends his SSI money. I can barely afford to put shoes on my feet and my grandmothers pet cat sat on top of a new laptop and soaked it in piss and she said that it was my fault because I didn't lock the door when I went to sleep. So I went back home and didn't wanna talk to her for a few weeks out of anger.

My real father comes back into my life in 2017 and a year later he actually gets me a job working with him for the mayor of a small town near Columbus renovating rental properties. I find out mom cheated on him with the man that worked at Goodyear. The mayor pays me 200 dollars for a week of work and I thought if this is the rate I’m starting out I’m just gonna move up here. So I worked with him for over a month but I was still calling my grandmother twice a week just to see how she is doing. I try to call one day I never got an answer so then I tried again the next day and a nurse answers the phone and tells me she almost died.

I told my father I need to go back and be with her so when I got back my mother said she was gonna pay me 50 bucks to help my grandmother get situated inside of a nursing home facility. I said ok when I get done with this dad can just pick me up and take me back when all of this is finished. Not only was I lied to but my grandmother fell and fractured one of her bones and had to lay starving in her own piss and shit for 3 days before any of my family bothered to come over and check on her. She only spent one day in the nursing home before she started crying and screaming she wanted to go home. I wound up having to spend 2 months living at her house again changing her depends cooking all her meals the whole nine yards. Funny thing was when me my aunt and my mom went to pick her back up from the nursing home they had a good laugh after making the comment that they should have just let the crabby old bitch walk back home with her depends around her ankles holding onto a walker.

Here I am 30 years old all of my teeth are rotten and I don’t have any money for a dentist. I have never been able to stay on one job long enough to even know the first thing about paying income taxes because my aunt and my grandmother take turns crying over the phone that nobody is taking care of them. I would rather sleep under a bridge than go on welfare. I have never owned a car or got a stimulus check. I have never had my own place and I have never owned a smartphone. And all my family can do is sit around and laugh at me when I'm not around and call me a loser, meanwhile their kids are going to college and are living out on their own, but if it was any of them dealing with this they would have put my grandmother away a long time ago. It’s like as long as she is my problem they don’t have to deal with her but the minute they hear she’s too sick to eat or doesn’t feel well they would be the same people to jump on the phone yelling, “WHY HAVENT YOU MADE HER NOTHING TO EAT!” I am not a danger to myself or anyone around me.

My father has not been back to see me or even call me because every single time he shows up my family asks him if he has any money, I have no friends and I have anxiety attacks that keep me from sleeping at night because I know I’m going to die homeless under a bridge because I’m at that age that nobody is going to want to hire me anymore. I do little jobs here and there so I can buy some vodka and cranberry juice so it’s easier to go to sleep at night. For the past two weeks yet again here I am at my grandmothers house. She goes through 3 pairs of pants a day because of bladder problems I have to change her depends 7-8 times a day. I have to comb her hair take her phone calls do her cooking. Sometimes I don’t sleep for 2 days straight just so I can sleep on the third day to be up early enough to help her to the bathroom.

Again I’m 30 years old but it’s like I spent 17 years of my life in jail for a crime that I didn’t commit. And I told my grandmothers caseworker back when I was 23 years old that people I've tried to talk to over the years have told me that I can get paid for the work that I'm doing with her and all she said to me was that I would interfere with the income she was getting from the government so she can't do it. My mom doesn't own a car and she lied about being disabled so she could live off of her children’s SSI and my grandmother doesn't know how to read or write and has never owned a car but got pregnant 8  times so she could live off their SSI and my grandfather could use it to get drunk with. My family does like the remind me though that because I don't believe in God that I'm going to go to hell. Scientists have long since proven that dinosaurs existed millions of years before humans. I finally understood that the enlightenment that the Buddha was talking about was actually another word for nihilism. I suppose I understand letting go of material possessions and not causing suffering to other living creatures. Nihilism for me is like Buddhism except I am still a meat eater. I think people who are vegan do not understand that if these animals were not in such a demand that they are then they would go away just like the rest of the other species we've had a hand in wiping out as we let our population grow larger and larger.

I love my 84yo grandmother very much and she tells me she loves me and my mother has not told me she loved me in over 22 years. And I'd like to think that I'm finally going to be free to be by myself and make my own choices for once by the time that my grandmother is dead. But I know all that is going to happen is I'm going to be one of those 40yo men that stand on the street begging people for spare change. Till one day a cousin of mine is gone drive up in a new car laughing at me telling me I should have went to college. It's February 2021, I got a birthday coming up in 4 month, I have never been to jail one day in my life, I have no criminal record of any kind. I've just always been this dog that gets is chain tugged on and I bark.

The only thing that the world has taught me is people only have time for you as long as it is convenient for them and even when they appear genuine I always wonder if everything coming out of their mouth is a fucking lie. I have fantasies about picking up the pieces that Hitler left behind after he shot himself in the head only I do not believe in a master race. I feel betrayed by my own empathy for other human beings, I don't care what color they are, they are destructive selfish semi evolved primates that are too brainwashed by their own bullshit to accept the fact that money is their God. And just because there are children across America dying in the hospital from cancer that doesn't mean that when they die they got a heaven to go to. 

After all those days trapped in my room when I was a child barely even weighing 90 pounds I never thought for one minute I was gonna grow up to be a loser. Lol if any of my family read this they would just say that if I was so damn miserable why didn't I just get out? Oh cool so that means you're gonna move her into your house? No??? Does that mean you're gonna help her with all of her daily activities so she doesn't cry to me on the phone every couple of days that she's not getting any help and all her home heath aides do is do dishes and sit on their ass? No??? Ok then what kind of Christmas card did you pick out for me this year? Whoever said we were getting you one, you need to get a job you damn loser. And it's actually worse now because they stopped all of her home heath aides last year because my mother gave her bed bugs and she didn't want to say anything about it.

I feel like a human trafficking victim with stockholm syndrome but when I look up what a caregiver is it actually says work without pay right in the description so it's not like I can take anyone for lost wages. I've never even got a present for my birthday party or for Christmas since I was 7 years old and the only time I do is when my grandmother gives me some money so I can put some new shoes on my feet or get a new coat to wear.

But I'm a man I'm not supposed to talk about my feelings I need to suck it up.

[mmmhowaboutno]

ive barely talked about this to anyone, i thought i got over it but you dont just get over stuff like this. i just wanna write it somewhere. a few days ago was august 3rd. three years ago on that day i was drugged and sexually assaulted in my own home by someone who i thought was my friend. i was friends with him for five years prior, so it came as a shock to me when this happened, not just because of what happened but because i realized trusting people is something i may do too easily. 

my parents went away for the weekend with my brother, and my “friend” was in town, so i thought i would invite him over so we could drink and play video games. we had been planning to hang out for a while and i thought it was just a chill thing to do with someone youve been friends with for so long. i still think that. i had two shots of vodka and after that started to feel more drunk than normal. i remember him constantly stuffing his water bottle in my face telling me to drink. at first he casually asked if i just wanted some water, so i didnt think anything of it. when things started getting fuzzy he would say “drink this, its just water, youre so drunk youll feel better.” he never drank from it though. guess where the drugs were. 

i remember bits and pieces of what happened and the stuff he did to me. i remember “across the universe” was playing in the background as i drifted in and out of consciousness. i wanted to watch that movie since high school and always put it off, but now ill never be able to watch it. i remember that while i was on the floor and couldnt move or speak he would make me drink water and tell me that i would feel better soon, all while he was rubbing my thighs or reaching up my shorts. i remember being unconscious for a long time, and when i woke up, he was in the bathroom. i could barely hold up my phone, but i called my boyfriend first. it was 4am for him and his phone was on silent, but he said that he woke up right as i was calling for some reason, like he felt something bad was happening. i couldnt talk. its like i was in one of those dreams where you try to run away but cant, except i couldnt get words out of my mouth at all. all i managed to say was “drugged me.” my boyfriend told me to call the police, so i did. 

when he came out of the bathroom, he acted like everything was normal. i can still see and hear him standing over me and asking “you okay?” while i was drooling on the floor and couldnt lift my head from the drugs that he gave me. i cant remember what happened until the police came. i only remember the knocking at the door and them telling me to open it. the knocking was so fucking loud. he kept looking at me and asking why i called the police, to which i couldnt answer anything. he started panicking and went in and out of the rooms upstairs in my house. he didnt answer the door, and they kept knocking. i somehow managed to get up, tripped and crawled down half of the stairs, and opened the door for them. i remember my dog barking and an officer placing me on a stretcher and so many questions being tossed around. they asked me how old i was and had me call my boyfriend so they could talk to him. they asked my “friend” if he knew that i had a boyfriend, like that would make a difference in him wanting to drug me or being responsible for it. 

he told the officers that i had had a lot to drink before he got to my house, that i was already drunk off my ass before he got there. they let him go. i told them where the drugs were. i pointed at the water bottle that was in his hand and i told them that the drugs were there, in whatever broken words i could get out, and they let him leave. they didnt test the water bottle for anything or look around my house or ask me if i was okay. they didnt ask what he did to me or even ask if he did anything, they just let him leave and took me to the hospital. they didnt even question the fact that he was buying a minor alcohol, they just let him fucking leave. 

when i was at the hospital, they tested me for my alcohol levels, which they said were normal. so there was physical evidence that i was not, in fact, drunk, like he said. when i started to come to after waiting at the hospital for hours, i told the doctors where the drugs were. i told them to test the water bottle, i begged and pleaded for them to get in touch with police and tell them that i didnt have any alcohol in my system, that it was drugs that he had given me. there was fucking proof, but they didnt do anything.

they asked me if i wanted to call my mom, and i almost did, but then i remembered that it was her birthday. so, i spent those three hours alone in the room thinking about all the reasons i was a fuck up and how this was all my fault. no one seemed to believe me, so maybe i did make it all up and i was actually drunk. but no, there wasnt any alcohol in my system. i only had two shots. after a while, the doctors told me i could go home. i was confused because i didnt have a way to get home, so they told me get an uber or something. they didnt really care at this point. i called an uber, and went outside to meet the car. once my feet hit the ground outside i realized that i didnt have any shoes on. i dont know why but i thought it was strange. i kinda hyper-focused on that as i waited for the uber. everything around me was so loud. all of a sudden, a young-ish nurse came outside and stood next to me. he said he would wait with me. i saw him pass my room a couple times while i cried silently for those few hours i was in the hospital. he stood outside with me and walked me to my uber, asked the uber driver for his name and number, and told me i would be okay. i remember what he looked like and ill genuinely never forget him. he made me feel safe just by doing that little thing, i knew i could trust him when i didnt even trust myself in that moment. 

the car ride home felt like it took forever. i was scared of the uber driver and the road and the fact that it was dark outside and most of all of what my mom would think and say when i finally told her what happened. i got home and walked up to my house to see that the main lights were on. my dog was waiting for me on the stairs and ran up to me as i walked inside. he kept licking me and didnt leave my side, but after a while of my dog being attentive and moving around, i realized how quiet it was inside my house. his car wasnt outside anymore, so i knew he had left, but this sudden wave of inexplicable fear washed over me. i started very anxiously searching every room, looking behind doors and in cabinets for some stupid fucking reason. i looked under every bed and turned on every light in my house. i dont know why but i thought he would still be there, waiting for me. i was looking for any trace of him still being in the house and waiting to do it to me all over again. i went upstairs and looked in my brothers closet only to find the vodka that my “friend” had brought for us to drink hidden in a corner. in the room next to mine was the bag with the receipt for the vodka that he bought. in the room where it all happened was the pizza we had gotten to eat and the cushions that he put under my head when i kept flopping over and drooling. that room was like a war zone to me. i couldnt look at it or be in it, i couldnt for almost a year. there were remnants of what happened all over my house and i felt like i couldnt escape it. it happened in the place where i was supposed to feel the most safe, and now i felt trapped in it.

i went into my room and got into bed with my dog. it was 4am, i couldnt sleep, and i didnt know what to do. every noise made me jump. every noise outside made me peek through the blinds to make sure that it wasnt his car pulling back up to my house. i found myself more awake than exhausted, as i should have been. im sure he slept fine that night. im sure he was okay and that he went home knowing that i was in the hospital and my mind was going 1000 miles an hour trying to remember every little detail of what happened so i could convince the cops that he had drugged me. because evidence wasnt enough. words werent enough for them to even try to dig into the fact that maybe i was possibly telling the truth. the cops didnt care, the doctors didnt care. they let him go. 

i dont know why i decided to write about this now, because for the most part, im “over it.” i do still think about what happened occasionally. it keeps me up at night sometimes, but not as much as in the first year after it happened. what i think about the most is the fact that no one believed me. i wasnt drugged and sexually assaulted and then reported it a few days later. the cops came and picked me up in the house where it all happened. they stood next to the person that did it. they looked him in the eye and they looked at the water bottle with drugs in it and at me barely conscious and unable to speak. they let him go. so unfortunately it doesnt surprise me when no one fucking cares if someone remembers and speaks out about their trauma years later because thats the moment they feel comfortable enough to finally talk about it. if cops didnt care in the very moment it was happening to me, it doesnt surprise me that they dont care at all. ever. 

he never tried to text or reach out to me again. why would he? i blocked him the next day anyway and i havent heard anything since. ive been silently dealing with it by myself for years. i went to a therapist about it. she told me that it was my fault for inviting him over in the first place. thats what my parents told me too. 

and the thing is, im not even the “worst” of it at all. this happens all the fucking time. theres very substantial evidence and cops and doctors will stare at it and think about how much work itll be going through the motions to do their fucking jobs and protect the people being assaulted. its too much work for them, but not for the person having trouble falling asleep every night for years because all they can think about is the moment they were unable to protect themselves and were taken advantage of. i always compare what happened to me to what happened to other people. i think less of it because so much worse has happened to other people. i wasnt raped, people are every day but i wasnt. it could have been worse, and ive always pushed the whole thing out of my mind because of that, but i dont think i should. i dont think it wasnt a big deal, and i dont think it will ever be not a big deal. i think that this shit happened to me and happens to people every day and no one fucking cares because its too much work for them to care. this isnt a metoo post, i just needed to put it into writing somewhere because im tired of keeping it inside. i dont want pity, i never have, i think a lot of people think that when something like this happens and someone speaks out about it that thats what they want. i just wanna say it. sometimes its just fucking good to say it. so for the people who do think that i want pity or that dont believe me or that support cops or that dont think this was a big deal: fuck you and have a horrible day.

thats it sorry

[luvdsc]

so far we have mint, raisins, cantaloupe, cannoli, potato and lots more! we can make a whole picnic ashshja i can also add some chicken n_uggets, now all i need is you!!💞 my pick up lines have run out and i can't think of anymore huhu😖 ooh!! ive always loved playing basketball as a hobby and especially when PE rolled around. i can't relate much on the robotics but for piano i can! my parents forced me to play but i quit after 1 year of playing and tbh now i regret it sm :(( (1/3)

volunteering is such a lovely thing to do! what do you usually do? for me, school usually makes us volunteer once every year and like sometimes we go to orphanages, school for the disabled, nursing homes and other stuff! unfortunately i haven't had the chance to do it this year since covid struck and im missing all the activities!! omo from the way you say it, college really is jammed pack huh? im glad youre able to juggle it around well!! (im supposed to start this year eekkk) (2/3)

idk why but i have a feeling that our time zones differ a lot ahhzha but the weather isn't far different from mine!! its always around 85 - 95 degrees here, really warm and somewhat hot if you're not used to it, lots and lots of sunshine (i'm lucky if theres wind lol) i hope the weather is better for you today. don't forget to stay happy and have fun!♡ (i havent had the chance to read your newest fic yet but im going to rn!!!) (3/3)

✿ ✿ ✿

I LOVE CHICKEN NUGGETS OMG ESPECIALLY THE DINO SHAPED ONES!!!! Also, it’s official, we’re going on a picnic, whilst sitting six feet apart because social distancing is still important 💕 and that’s ok, honey bee!!! I have plenty to share :’) i hope you aren’t too tired because you’ve been running through my mind all day! 💓 omg yesss, basketball was always super fun in PE! Which position did you usually play? I also really liked pinball and soccer during PE. Omg aw ): well you can always get back into it! 💖 A couple of my friends are taught themselves the piano, and they’re really good!

I was able to experience all different types of volunteering! In 6th-12th grade, I volunteered often at a nonprofit that had a food bank where I package food and handed them out and a clothing donation center where I sorted through and hung up the clothes. I also volunteered at a nursing home in 8th grade regularly, and the seniors there were so lovely :’) And during the holidays, my family and I would volunteer at another place where we wrapped presents for little kids! I also volunteered weekly in a nearby hospital’s patient services for four years in hs where I discharged patients, talked to them regularly, and played the piano in various floors. And I helped with bake sales and donation drives through the community service club in hs! In college, I did a year long volunteering fellowship where I worked with students at a nonprofit trade school every week for 25 hours and helped them write resumes and cover letters and prepare for interviews! I also planned and organized two career fairs with over 50 businesses each and discussion panels!! And I worked with that trade school again for my senior project and came up with several lesson plans and revamped their old lesson materials :) oh, and I really enjoy community garden cleanups and coastal beach cleanups!!

your school sounds amazing! Does the whole class go together or do you get to choose where you want to volunteer? Ah yeah, unfortunately, covid halted everything ): college life is definitely hectic, but also one of the most fun years in your life! 💛 You get to experience the exciting parts of being an adult without actually being an adult if that makes sense?? I’m so excited for you, I hope you have the best time at college 💕💕 Omg wait does this mean you just graduated hs? if so, congratulations, honey bee!!! ✨

Oooo, my time zone is pst!!! What’s yours if you don’t mind me asking? Oh god, it’s always like that for you? Do you go outside a lot in that weather? It’s like that here in the summer, and I hate it, but I’m just grateful that there’s no humidity here :’) but yes, the weather is much better today!!! 🤩🤩 it’s 70, but it’s windy and cloudy 💗 how’s your weather like today? And thank you so much, sweetpea!!! 🥰 I hope you’re having a good weekend and having fun as well! And omg thank you for reading, lovebug!!! 🐝🌷 I hope it doesn’t disappoint :’)

#asks #malicieuxes

[homestucky]

Davekat fic recs?

hrrmm wow i will have to think. ill probs just check my bookmarks which means i probably wont be able to think of many one chapter fics off the top of my head since i dont tend to bookmark them. also some that havent been updated in yrs i wont put here bcaus thats just frustrating unless theyre rlly notable and may come back i may not link them

also disclaimer that while im not super into smut so its unlikely im gonna recommend just porn fics, some may have some sexy times incidentally i suppose. also a lot of them are dave centric/dave POV bcaus hes my BOY

M.C. Escher that’s my favourite MC by Unda (COMPLETE)  is a wild ride and long but i recommend for sure, very well written n thought out. also check out the other fics in the series bcaus if i recall correctly there are some other shorter fics that unda wrote to give some background or develop characters. but theyre also really great even stand-alone! its finished now and i followed it the whole time :0. cw for child abuse and death 

Within, Without by reinkist (COMPLETE)  i actually read a long time ago so i dont remember it so well. i do remember thinking it was pretty great tho, so i do recommend it. i should probably go back for a reread some time. its just a really good meteor fic that explores everything you’d want it to, and does that well, u kno? its like the fic that u wanted to exist but couldnt find. but here it is!

Doc Scratch’s School for Supernaturally Gifted Adolescents by medical  (UNFINISHED AND RECENTLY UPDATED)is great, its like a multichapter magic/superhero au thing. its fun and characters in it are rlly well developed, like, i do enjoy a davekat fic which has a good and significant rose characterisation in there too. but theres some serious plot goin in in here too…. very exciting. 

To Be Taken Care Of by shitstuck  (COMPLETE)is good, its god some deep convos about troll v human culture and stuff, some rosemary too. bit of body horror but if i can handle it its not too bad. i just reread it lol. the epilogue changes the tone of things a bit n id be interested to know other peoples thoughts on that ;_;

Don’t Forget the Sun by Weevilo707 is rlly good but sadly NOT COMPLETE AND HASNT BEEN UPDATED IN AGES :@!! hope the authors doin ok  (EDIT: APPARENTLY the author is not planning on updating this one again, but i still think its a good read :^) )

Book Covers by turntechGeneticist717  (COMPLETE) is rlly great also!! big recommend. dave is lookin after a babby dirk as his big brother in college. i havent read it in a while but i remember when it was updating being like !!!!!!!!!!!Aaa!! also there are others in the series so take a look :)

The Truth is in the Eyes by AcrylicMist  (COMPLETE)is like a rlly mythological/fantasy interpretation of canon post game which is very cool????? like the world is sort of medieval or something but w the gods n magicky stuff. rlly interesting. , very dope again havent read it in a while and am running out of steam for ranting about fics but!! yea its sweet w an intriguing plot

The Eurydice Suite by callmearcturus  (COMPLETE) !!!!!!!!!!! i love this fic so much like its bonkers n i just. its like an inception sort of inspired au and i have NEVER watched inception but im just super into the concept. its just. a rlly amazing well written fic w perfect pacing and characterisation like the plot is like a beautiful spider web where time flicks back and forth yet makes perfect sense. theres such a sense of atmosphere. ive reread it so many times. also!!1111111 i love the dave in it, and i love the strilondes family relationsy stuff!! i also feel like it ties everything up rlly nicely despite having like all the main characters in it p much. hell yeaaaa. its my fav by this author whos an AMAZING writer like they just DROP U IN to the world with so much confidence and drop context and background in at a perfect pace so ur never confused but always intrigued. but often i find the atmosphere in their fics almost TOO intense u know?? like i feel like i wake up in a ditch after reading one like wh,,h who am i?? i hate using this word but the writing is weirdly like… “sensual” which i think means the writing is great, rlly strong atmosphere but im not  always 100% able to handle it. this one does not make me feel so dazed and its just.. yess

The Lucky Ones by daniomalley (COMPLETE) is another one i followed as it came out. a cool spacey au. sorry i cant think of anything else to say aaaa

Off Court by levvan (ON HIATUS?) is great tho strong themes of abuse from the start. not that none of the above have that if i havent said so uhhhh yea be wary of the tags i guess. but yes. 

three rounds and a sound by skitpost (UNFINISHED AND RECENTLY UPDATED) is rlly great, like a magic school au. very excited to see whats gonna happen next :0

We’re All Friends & Family Here (And Frankly, We’re Sick Of Your Shit) byLandOfMistAndSecrets (COMPLETE) is TECHNICALLY a dirkjake fic but it has very cute little pastiches of other characters and the DK ones are very cute and well characterised

An Alien and a DJ Walk into a Bar (and Accidentally Start a Relationship) by Kadaaver (APPEARS TO BE ON HIATUS) i was p into when it was still updating. theres not actually MUCH relationship stuff yet if i recall correctly but still. good. and i enjoy the characterisation of dave being p socially anxious.

turntechGodhead is offline by forestknifefight (UNFINISHED AND RECENTLY UPDATED) well relatively recently. i like this one a lot! theres some good beta kid friendship and some good karkat.

Astronomy in Reverse by PunkZucchini, sicklekind (ON HIATUS>??????) cute + features BIGKAT is i recall correctly

Bring You Down by acedavestrider (COMPLETE) idk what to say about this but thats not a criticism. its just a legit cute fic that is good for the heart. human au, earth n whatever. karkat is a student nurse!! yeaa! thats kind of incidental but i like it

Survival of the Richest by ireallyloveicecream (HIATUS???) theres not a lot of it but im so intrigued. some kind of a fae/magic fairy folk kinda thing

Californian Son by LivTC (COMPLETE BUT THERES MORE IN THE SERIES WHICH I HOPE WILL CONTINUE TO BE UPDATED ETC ETC) !! ok this one is kind of sexy n angsty and daves a REAL DICK in it but it rlly well written and i rlly wanna know more jijhihihu

First Contact by yesfir (UNFINISHED AND RECENTLY UPDATED) !! its au but like idk scifi, humans having to make a deal with/coexist with trolls. space colonies!! this one is great… good character development and plot… does that great thing of pacing the revelations of the plot rlly gradually so ur like ! somethings happening here and i must know more!!!

Feathered by AlloftheFandom  (UNFINISHED, RECENTLY UPDATED) this ones exciting :3 karkat has only just been introduced to it. its like a magicky world w a bit of mild body horror so far. some good strilondes also… has anyone noticed that i need strilonde family relations in a fic i love….

Soulmates by egossweetheart  (UNFINISHED (fairly..?) RECENTLY UPDATED) this is a souleater au which i dont know a lot about??? but its cool, i am suitably intrigued. bit of body horror. idk as always check the tags. idek why im bothering to specify that. anyways,

 Vladimir and Estragon Cope with Their Trauma by Volo (UNFINISHED RECENTLY UPDATED ETC) afterlife au. so yea TW death. im into it tho

The Importance of Being Karkat by choicescarfsylveon (UNFINISHED RECENTLY UPDATED ETC) karkat has a radioshow, dave is kind of a dick. some parts of that change. i wont spoil which. theres something deeper goin on too…….. mysterios….

anyways here are some fics that i think are cool. sorry it took ages i just wanted to give it a good effort ukno?? its not an exhaustive list but its what i found. thanks to all these authors and hey, while we’re at it, all fanfic authors!! good work and i hope u all know how appreciated it is. anyways i have a headache so i guess ill finish this up. peace!

#davekat #dave strider #karkat vantas #homestuck #fanfiction #dave #karkat #ask #long post

[lilithsworldd]

A Date with Fangs Fogarty

A bit of backstory: it's like 2 am and I have been wanting to type this out for literal ages but havent had the motivation until now. Essentially, Y/N [your name for those who dont know] reveals to their boyfriend Fangs that they want to go to the aquarium for their birthday and Fangs plans it out and makes it a special day. I hope you all enjoy I loved writing this. The moodboard was made by @southsidersweetpea a lovely human being.

It had been the one time you and Fangs were able to agree on a date. Normally things were wild and unpredictable, what would start off as a date to Pops would turn in to playing laser tag or curling up and casually watching a movie, but this time you had been firm. One day the two of you were curled up on your bed cuddling after a long day, your head was on his chest while you resisted the urge to sleep from the warmth Fangs' body gave off and that's when you just began to ramble, "Do you know what I want for my birthday?"

Fangs had been in his own state of comfort; as he laid in the bed his head was tipped back and his eyes closed as his fingers lazily danced across your arm tracing patterns on your skin. Too comfortable to speak, he responded to your question with a simple, "Hm?" as his eyes opened slightly to stare at the ceiling.

"I want to go to an aquarium; I went to one when I was little but I havent been able to go since. It would just be a nice trip I think" Y/N said in a sleepy tone, but this had captured Fangs attention and no sooner than you had fallen asleep he was planning things out in his head from ways to earn the money to scheduling and activities to do beforehand.

Now it was a month later, the day of your birthday and you found it suspicious that your parents hadnt made a cake for you, "Mom we always do a little get together with the family. You have always made that a priority" you pointed out suspiciously taking in the way the corner of her lips pulled up in to a smile, "Well it's Saturday sweetheart I'm sure you would rather spend your birthday with your friends this year and not kick back at home all miserable with your parents. We can open your presents and eat cake tonight" she said and almost as if a bell went off, Fangs walked in to the house with your favorite flowers. Immediately a smile came to your lips as you took them, "Fangs this is so sweet" you said as your mom took the flowers to put them in a vase

"That isnt even the best part of the day." Fangs said with a cheeky grin, "Go get your jacket we are going on a ride, no questions it's a surprise" he said and kissed your forehead. Still in a state of confusion, you reluctantly went up to your room and grabbed your jacket before waving to your mom and going out to Fangs' motorcycle and putting on the helmet he had specifically for you. As Fangs walked out to the bike he pulled his helmet on, "one other thing; we are stopping before our final location for breakfast and then you have to spend the rest of the trip in a blinfold" .

The ride felt like it took forever, the two of you had sat down at a small cozy restaurant and had a nice breakfast and Fangs stayed true to the promise of handing over a blindfold once the bill was payed, "Fangs is this really necessary? How are you even getting the money to do this babe?" You asked him as he placed the blindfold over your eyes.

"I've been saving up but dont worry, you are going to love it" Fangs promised as he guided you to his bike. The aquarium was only 10 minutes away from the restaurant and by the time you got there he could feel the anxiety coming off of you as he guided you inside, motioning for the lady at the cash register to be quiet. Once she noticed the blindfold and excited but pleading expression of Fangs she nodded and motioned to the prices as he pulled out his wallet and handed the money over mouthing ,'Thank you' before guiding you to the main entrance and finally the first specimen of fish, "alright, here is the main surprise of the day babe." Fangs stated before allowing you to take off the blindfold, there was wonder and amazement in your eyes and that is all that he could have dreamt of and he quickly snapped a picture on his phone of your reaction, "are you alright Y/N? You seem speechless" he said in an amused voice

You finally managed to get the words out, "Fangs you crazy bastard, I cant believe you did this!"

"Well you said it was what you wanted and honestly I thought it would be fun for me too. So here we are on your special day" Fangs said and wrapped his arm around her looking at the school of fish swimming in front of them, "so where do you want to start? We have pretty much all day. I cleared it with your mom and dad. But we do have to get home tonight" he said with a chuckle.

Most of your day with each other had been spent staring in awe at the large and impressive fish which lurked beneath the waters and then came the shark exhibit. "Oh my gosh Fangs look at the size of that hammerhead! Its massive!" you exclaimed practically bouncing in excitement

Fangs couldnt help but to mirror that same attitude as he looked at it, he licked his lips with a soft chuckle as he looked at you taking pictures on your phone, "You do love sharks. I should have guessed you would be able to immediately name one and comment on the size"

"Well a hammerhead is easy to identify, I more think that its impressive they have a couple bull sharks mixed in there and I do think that I see a nursing shark there at the bottom but I can't really tell because its hidden" Y/N rambled on as Fangs came up behind you and draped his arms around her shoulder setting his chin on top of her head watching the creatures swim around, the two of you sat in a comfortable silence until you turned and wrapped your arms around his middle, "this day has been magical Fangs. Its everything I dreamed it would be, actually it's even better. Thank you so much for the best birthday present I have ever received in my life" you said before kissing him gently, that's when you felt his arms move to gently take your left hand in his, panic filled you as he started looking for something in his jacket which was replaced with relief when you saw a long box, "Fangs havent you done-" you started to protest when he pulled the bracelet out of the box

Fangs gently unclasped the bracelet and slid it around Y/N's wrist not saying a word as she tried to protest then he smiled looking at her. The bracelet had been a snake which coiled around her wrist perfectly, the body had been black with blue eyes, "I wanted to go all out, but I saw you staring at it in the store. I promise this is my last gift of the day." He promised. You looked at the bracelet with tears welling, you pulled him in to a kiss and pulled away, "Fangs Fogarty I am so lucky to have you in my life. You're the best boyfriend ever"

I hope you all enjoyed reading it, I look forward for your reactions and I'm sorry if it felt inconsistent I just needed to spread this sweetness to the world Cx

#fangs riverdale #riverdale fangs #fangs fogarty #drew ray tanner #birthday #aquarium #date #relationship goals #i really hope you enjoy it! #i had fun writing this #drabble #one shot #can this count as an imagine #riverdale

[rosykims]

5 + 10 for emeraude, 14 + 18 for effie, 19 + 24 for arylene and 30 through 45 for imogen bc i love her so much ? 😏😏😏

fdjkfjkfdk thank u SO much maia i absolutely Treasure You !

EMERAUDE HAWKE - DA2

What does your OC normally wear? What would your OC wear on a special night?

emeraudes fashion sense is probably my favourite out of all my ocs, so uh if u havent looked at her pinterest board yet u should do that bc its Very cute hehehe

anyway for the most part she sticks to dark, practical clothing whenever she's out and about in kirkwall or doing merc work, etc. she picks clothes that convey strength and power, but she likes having a little bit of colour somewhere on the piece, just to keep things interesting. she's not much of an embroider, but was a good way to keep herself distracted during hard times, so she tends to add little patterns here and there whenever she gets the chance!

as for special occasions, for her this would actually just be. a quiet night at home or a relaxed gathering with her friends. bc its so rare for her to have that lmao. anyway for events like that she usually wears light colours and soft fabrics, simple but always decorated with flowers or colourful patterns.

What does your OC keep in a special drawer?

she has a collection of gifts ! that kids from lowtown would give her over the years she spent in kirkwall. she's a very community based person and wants to do right for her city, and shes very nurturing (in an ironical, Cool Big Sister way) so she likes making sure all the kids are safe and being looked after. she gets a lot of trinkets and strange gifts from some of the kids as a result, but she does treasure them (even if she laughs about it with her friends) and keeps them all !

EFFIE RYDER - MEA

Who is the mother and/or father figure in your OC’s life?

effie's maternal rolemodel has always been her late mother, ellen. nobody could really fill that role in her eyes, since they had such a close, positive relationship before she passed. her relationship with her dad was a lot more strained and it really impacted a lot of her relationships later on in life too ! she tends to.... see an older man who is Vaguely Nice to her, and then think “ oh, youre my dad now?” which isnt fair to anybody obviously but yeah she,,,, has a lot of unresolved issues regarding alec and tends to unintentionally project so. We stan !

How many times did your OC move as a child? Which area was his/her favorite?

oh constantly lol. With her dad being an n7 and her mother working so hard on her research, they tended to move around wherever her parents work required. she actually enjoyed it this way. she was never good at making long term friends, but she lived meeting new people, and obviously with the move she got to experience a lot of different cultures which really put the idea of adventuring and travelling in her head at a young age.

ARYLENE TORR - TES IV

What does your OC think of children- either in general or about having them?

she likes them ! she tends to keep her distance with most communities and groups of people in particular, but she does like enjoys having the odd conversation with the odd street urchin here and there, either sharing with them some strange, ridiculous life advice or – if shes feeling particularly chaotic – telling them the scariest stories she can think of. as for having them, arylene isnt AGAINST the idea, but she has far too much for the foreseeable future for that to ever be a good idea

Who are the people your OC dislikes/hates?

outwardly, arylene is an almost unbearably easy going person, so you would assume she doesnt hate anyone lol. but she does DEEEPLY dislike cults and groups of ignorant people who are arrogant enough to start messing with the balance of life, or making deals with gods, etc. she believes that people like that can do an unbelievable amount of damage, so she invests a lot of time and effort it sabotaging any group or plot she happens to find !

 IMOGEN FOSTER - RDR2

Did your OC participate in extracurricular activities, and if so, what were they?

hmm idk if this even EXISTED in 19th century london lol, but she would have done some very tame version of girl scouts as a child! She barely remembers any of it, but she liked the classes on what plants did what, which were safe to eat, and the likes. its something that helps her a lot when on the run with the gang, and something shes always had a personal interest in, as a nurse !

other than that, she’s done a lot of independent study on history, classical literature, and she speaks fluent italian we stan !

What is your OC’s opinion of school? What kind of student was s/he?

imogen comes from a very wealthy aristocratic family, so she was very fortunate that her privilege afforded her the education she got at the time. she is VERY grateful to have attended the schools she did, and she made sure to make the most of it, paying attention in class and studying harder than most of her classmates. she's a smart girl with a very active mind, so knowledge is something she can't get enough of. she was actually petitioning the board of education to allow her to attend university before she left for america – already their had been women accepted into universities at that time, but obviously it was still a very scandalous thing lol, especially since imogen wanted to study medicine.

What subjects did your OC excel at?

imogen is a HUGE overachiever and did pretty well at basically everything from science, mathematics, language studies and later on, in her studies as a nurse. i can tell you what shes bad at though lmao

anything physical really dkdkdks she is TERRIBLE at horse-riding since she usually just went by carriage everywhere in the city. art and poetry and writing in general she was never great at, because she's a pretty logical person and was told she never put enough emotion in her work lol !!! sports...obviously was very limited anyway as growing up in like? the early 1870s lol. and as for the traditionally feminine lessons in like ?? sewing and cooking and stuff well ! she was very average at them which made her  feel worse than if she was actually bad bc she's so used to excelling and making a name for herself oof

What subjects interested your OC?

Imogen loves greek literature and mythology !! the iliad is her favourite book and she keeps her heavily annotated, dog eared copy – a gift from her late father – on her person almost constantly. needless to say its why dutch admires her as much as he does lol.

obviously, as a nurse-trying-to-be-a-doctor, she has a great love for medicine in all its forms. she's always been fascinated in natural remedies, and even moreso when she's running with the van der linde gang and is really relying on the land to survive.

What is your OC’s dream job and/or current profession?

hmm okay so. Technically she's a nurse – she worked in her father's hospital for almost 10 years prior to his death, and she was sort of his unofficial understudy, as in she knows a LOT more than her job description requires lol. but after her father past away, another, less progressive man took his place as chief of surgery and made a lot of changes to the way the hospital operated, and imogen was let go. she and her mother were fighting against it, however, under the ground of unfair dismissal, but obviously given the time period it didnt get them very far. so ! i mean technically she's unemployed rn. but she still has dreams of being a doctor, or at least continuing her career in medicine.

How is your OC working towards their dream job and/or achieved their current profession?

Oh VERY direct action up until she got disheartened and chose to take her sabbatical. she had been working in her role for nearly a decade, and was very obviously one of the most experienced nurses there. even younger doctors would sometimes ask her for her medical opinion dksksks anyway what i am saying is Brain Very Good. she had been fighting to gain admission into a university – any, she wasnt picky – to study medicine officially, but it didnt get very far and she put it on hold after her father got sick. after he died and she was laid off, she fought even harder against the city to reinstate her title, and continues to fight after she returns from america a year or so later.

What are your OC’s thoughts/opinions of his/her current profession?

helping people is her entire life, and she wouldn't know what to do without it. she loves being a nurse enough to fight to be a doctor, but also in BEING a nurse, she is hyperaware of all the things current medical standards seem to get wrong, and she has a lot of ideas about how else to go about things. her father, a shockingly progressive and worldly man for the time period, shared her sentiment, but he wasn't able to make the changes he wanted to before he passed, so imogen hopes she can be the change herself, and make her father proud

What is your OC’s biggest dream?

being a licenced doctor, babey ! preferably at her father's hospital, but at the point she will take what she can get.

How does your OC react to and handle stress?

imogen  handles stress very well , which is partially why she makes such a good medic, and also how she managed to survive the first week of being with the van der linde gang lmao. she is very good at shutting out EVERY distraction when things get dicey, and her brain tends to move at a million miles an hour. all traces of english etiquette and politeness go out the window, though, so you'll usually catch her barking orders at people, and yelling at anyone who prevents her from doing the work she needs to do. it.....is a big wake up call for people like dutch and micah, and gets her into a LOT of trouble on multiple occasions.

How does your OC handle anger?

ooo......not great. she’s grown up with parents who maybe encouraged her to speak her mind a bit....TOO much given the historical circumstances lol. she really doesn’t stand for ignorance or prejudices in any capacity, and if she has a problem with someone and it gets in the way of her trying to do her work or help others - she will ABSOLUTELY be having words. she also overestimates her own strength quite a lot. she’s tried to throw hands with micah MANY times, often forgetting she’s this tiny 70kg englishwoman and he’s .... Him sdjkdcjkf. she has a big mouth too so she often says snide remarks without even meaning too, which tends to get her in trouble as well. on the bright side, it also helps her fit in with the gang quite well, because for the most part they all appreciate how wild she is lmao

How does your OC handle grief?

hmm i guess it depends on what you would class as “well”? she doesnt cry very often - being stoic and handling your emotions is important when your a nurse - but she does tend to shove her feelings down far longer than she should, and tries to pretend they don’t exist by simply focusing on other things. she also blames herself when a lot of things go wrong, because she’s a perfectionist and wants to FIX everything, so when she finds something - or someone - she can’t save, it feels like a personal failure. like she let them down :(

What is your OC’s greatest fear?

probably being trapped in an unhappy, unfulfilling marriage with someone who undervalues her. she’s not much of a homebody and doesn’t have too much of an interest in being married, but the idea of feeling FORCED to marry someone in order to have a decent quality of life makes her blood run cold oof

What makes your OC happy?

helping people ! meeting new folks ! learning about other cultures and ways of life! learning about NEW THINGS in general ! proving people wrong ! insulting micah !

as tough and high-and-mighty as she sometimes seems, she’s a pretty easy person to please, honestly. treat her with respect, give her space to do the things she wants to do, and don’t get in the way of her opportunities to learn new things, and she’s mostly very happy !

What kind of sense of humor does your OC have?

she has a fairly macabre and sardonic sense of humour, something she picked up from her mother. she says a lot of Shocking things for the time period, and she’s not shy of dirty jokes either. the first time sean heard her, a soft, well spoken english Lady, make some filthy, crude joke, he nearly had a stroke right there on the spot kjkjkfdjkf

What are some things that greatly upset your OC?

senseless violence, suffering or cruelty. she really hated the gang at first and hoped to escape the first chance she got, because all she could see was the crime and disregard for human life she assumed they all held. fortunately, as she got to know them, she realized this wasn’t exactly the case, but she still has a lot of anger in her heart for a few key members of the gang who seem to enjoy bloodshed more than anything. she also hates any form of social prejudice, and people who gatekeep knowledge and opportunities from others.

What are some things that annoy your OC?

i guess all of the above, but she also dislikes misplaced arrogance, and people who talk down to others. she tolerates dutch, but often gets frustrated with the way he speaks, using as many big words as he can to manipulate and confuse others. she believes that really intelligence doesn’t require obscure jargon and big, fancy words - she likes keeping things simple, so everybody can follow along.

#trvelyans #asks #ilysm for asking so many questions gal and sorry for the late reply ! #oc: emeraude #oc: effie #oc: arylene #oc: imogen #imogen is my new rdr2 oc in case u couldnt tell djkdsjks #i need to update my ocs page with all my new Babies #also im so sorry for how long and probably messy these replies are #i did Not proofread this in the slightest so. godspeed !! #/ long post

[ohalemalia]

Daily Dose - (Part 2) (S.M Imagine)

Pairing: Scott McCall x Reader

Warnings:  emeto (throwing up), i havent proof read this whoops

A\N: Thanks for being so patient with me. Family things came up but i really wanted to get this out so here we go, part twoooo. Debating on a title change

Word Count: 1974

Summary: What makes Scott McCall so damn interesting? And what’s he got up his sleeve?

Needless to say, against my will and better judgement, thoughts of Scott McCall bounced around my head for the longest time. I came to the realization (all by myself, not because I eavesdropped on his conversation with Nurse Melissa, of course) that Wednesdays he got out of school early and would be by around 1:30pm to drop lunch off for her.

There was absolutely no reason for me to be interested, but when I really thought about it, I think it was because he was the only fresh face in this bland hospital (and the fact that he brought his mom lunch every single week, like come on, it doesn’t get better than that). But for the record, I am not into him because that would be insane considering we’ve had one, well, half of just one conversation. I refuse to be a cliche character who falls in love with the first boy they see no matter how smooth their skin looks or how toss able their hair is that you can just run your fingers throu

NO.

NOPE.

Not even going there.

Besides, realistically speaking the only relationship that I would be in anytime in the foreseeable future is me and this hospital bed. The only action I would get would be

Never mind, I’m not going there either.

Anyway, in case you were wondering it’s 1:23pm on a Wednesday. Not that that has any significant meaning.

P.S. I Still Love You by Jenna Han was currently under my nose and although my eyes were skimming over the page, my brain was elsewhere. My room had a side view of the front desk, so if he was coming, I would know about it.

What was I even going to say? Was I going to say anything? Was he going to even come in here?

This was stupid. I was stupid. I was being stupid.

I tried to focus on Lara Jean, but out the corner of my eye there he was again.

He set a bag of food on the counter and smiled at the front lady at the desk as he spoke to her. She pointed somewhere. He nodded and took a seat in one of the plastic waiting chairs. He looked down at his phone, scrolled for a few moments and laughed at something on his screen. I craned my neck to get a better look at him. He was wearing yet another tight shirt, this time in an olive green color and a denim jacket over it. His motorcycle helmet was sitting on the chair next to him. He leaned back in the chair and spread his legs in that guy sit that guys always do. He scrolled. And he scrolled. And he kept scrolling.

“Oh my god, could you look up from your phone for just one second,” I muttered underneath my breath.

His head snapped up as if someone spoke to him. He looked around the waiting room until his eyes met mine through the glass. I nearly choked. He blinked and then furrows his eyebrows at me. I quickly looked down at my book, hoping that he would just look away. I gave it about thirty seconds before I looked up again, and to my surprise he had disappeared from the chair. My shoulders slumped. Oh well. I guess I’d see him next week.

The doorknob to my room clicked and the door slowly opened. I looked up and my heart damn near stopped right then and there. He was there, in my doorway, smiling that puppy dog smile at me.

“I figured you could use some company,” his eyes widened and his words blurred together as he rambled on, “Unless that’s totally not okay then I can just leave and I’m really sorry and you can totally forget that I was even here.”

“No, it’s, I,” I closed my eyes, trying to reset my brain and get it to form complete sentences, “Yes, you can come in.”

“Cool,” He came in and shut the door behind him. He looked over my room again, his eyes resting on the dead flowers on my side shelf.

“I would water them,” I started to explain, “But I’m just, you know, really busy…”

“Yeah I bet,” He walked over to the shelf and gestured toward the books, “Can I?”

“Um, yeah, go ahead.” I’d never had anyone else touch my books before, so I watched him very carefully.

“Wow,” he mumbled under his breath, “It’s like your own personal library.”

“I wish,” I sat up straighter on my bed, “At least at a library I can get new books, I’ve read all of these.”

His eyes widened again and he held up a book, “All of them?”

“At least three times.”

“Wow,” he mumbled under his breath, “So, what do you read?”

“At this point, anything.”

It was silent as he went through my books. I felt self conscious as I heard the turning of pages of my books ripple through the air. Did he think my book taste sucked? Did he think reading was lame anyway?

My mouth began to salivate but I wasn’t hungry for answers, I wanted food. Real food. Whatever was in the bag that he had set down on my counter.

“That smells really good,” I felt like I was in a trance, a servant to the delicious smells of Fatburger.

Scott looked over his shoulder at the bag, “That?” He set the book down and walked over to the bag. He opened it up and looked inside, “It’s a burger and some fries. I brought it for my mom, but I’m pretty sure she wouldn’t mind if you had a couple fries.”

“Oh, I think she’d mind a lot,” I laughed half heartedly. He looked at me as if he didn’t get the joke. Or as if it wasn’t funny. I think the latter.

“I really shouldn’t,” I made it sound like I was being modest and humble, but my body would probably expel that greasy mess as soon as I put it in.

“No seriously, it’s okay Y/N,” he chuckled, “Really.”

As tempting as it was, I grimaced, “I can’t. Really. But thank you.”

He frowned as he folded the bag up and put it back on the counter, “Can I ask you a kind of personal question?”

“I suppose so,” I tapped my chin, “If you don’t mind that I might get really offended and kick you out.”

“I just,” he pressed his lips together as if he were selecting the right words, “Do you ever get out of here?”

I pressed my lips together and shook my head.

“Ever?” He was incredulous, “Like, what about school?”

“I don’t mind missing that,” I laughed, “Trust me.”

“Well, where do you wanna go?”

I was all too prepared for this. There were countless hours of staring at blank white walls to compile a list of places I’d rather be. I reached toward my books, “Can you pass me The Little Prince? It’s the book with the--”

“‘Got it,” He held the book up and handed it to me. I opened it up to page 42 and slid the sheet of notebook paper out that was scrawled on with glitter gel pen.

Y/N’s List of Places to Be Other Than Here

(No offense Melissa if you see this)

1. A friend’s house

2. A sleepover

3. Disneyland

4. Birch Aquarium

5. Greece

6. Mexico

7. Italy

8. A park

9. Fatburger, or any place that sells real people food

10. In the arms of someone I love

11. Northern Lights in Iceland, Sweden, Canada or Norway

12. Paris

13. On a road trip with friends

14. A Diner

Scott read over my shoulder as I read the items on the list out loud.  I could feel my face burning up as I got to number ten. I had definitely written that in a moment of weakness and vulnerability and it doesn’t reflect who I am as a person, obviously. I am not some cheese ball. “It’s not finished,” I folded it up, “And some of them I obviously can’t actually do, so, it’s just a dumb list.”

“I don’t think it’s a dumb list,” Scott held his hand out, “Can I see it again?”

“I, um, well,” I sighed and placed the paper in his hand. He looked it over again, his brow knitting in concentration. He nodded, “Okay, yeah, no totally not a dumb list.”

“I’m glad it has your seal of approval,” I picked at a loose thread on my sheets, “But I think I’ll just--”

“Uh,” Scott looked at the door as if he heard something coming, “Shoot. I gotta go.”

“Oh? You do?”

“Yeah,” he whirled around the room, packing up his belongings, “I probably shouldn’t be here and I might’ve told the receptionist I was going to the bathroom.”

“Oh, yeah, you probably should...you should go…”

“Before my mom kills me,” He grinned, “But at least I’m in a hopsital, right?”

His face immediately paled, “I mean, well she can’t really, you know--”

“Scott?!”

I could hear Melissa calling Scott’s name from the hallway. By the sounds of it, it sounded like she very well might wrangle Scott’s neck.

“Gotta go,” Scott opened the door and began to slip out.

“Wait, Scott, you still have my--”

The door shut behind him. I sighed.

“...my list.”

---

The next couple of days were a haze for me. I had a pretty bad fever. All I remember is waking up at 4:12am and immediately emptying the contents of my stomach into a bed pan. Nurse Melissa was off that night and instead Nurse Rosa came in and took my temperature while another Nurse, probably an intern since I didn’t recognise him, wrote some stuff down. Nurse Rosa reported me having a fever of 102. I slipped in and out of consciousness after that. I really wish I had a better description for it but it honestly all just was a haze that I was mostly asleep for it. My body felt like huge sandbags strapped into my mattress. My skin was burning. The light was too bright for my eyes. I was miserable.

When I woke up, I would’ve been happy about the fact that I felt better if it wasn’t for the fact that it was Thursday evening. Scott had come and gone by now. I sighed and turned over on my bed to face my books. What I saw there improved my mood easily by fifty points.

There was a stack of new books on top of my book collection, all with yellow BEACON HILLS HS LIBRARY stickers on them. There was my flower vase, but  it had brand new totally not withered flowers in it. There was a note attached to the vase. I pulled it off and unfolded it to see some messy handwriting scrawled inside:

-Y/N

I asked my mom if it was ok to come visit since you dont get a lot of visitors and she said yeah (: I came by but the docs said it wasn’t a good time, i waited around as long as i could, i’ve been coming after school too but it’s still being pretty bad, i hope you feel better soon because i’m bringing you something on wednesday and i don’t want it to go bad before you get to it. check in your drawer all the way in the back on the right. hope you enjoy it (but if it’s going to make you sicker...probably don’t eat it. get better soon,

-Scott M..

I leaned over as far as I comfortably could and opened the drawer on the bedside table. My hand flew to my mouth as I gasped, tears welling up in my eyes.

I had never been happier to see a Fatburger bag in my life.

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#teen wolf imagine #imagines #tw imagine #teen wolf #fandom imagines #imagine teen wolf #Scott McCall #scott teen wolf #scott mccall imagine #scott mccall imagines #daily dose

[peterpparkrr]

Changing the Tide: An Avengers Fanfic (5/7)

Summary: Wanda Maximoff is the new girl in town and also reconciling with the death of her twin brother, Pietro. As she starts to navigate her new life she manages to stumble into friendship with a group of teens who are surprisingly similar to her

A/N: This is basically just a highschoolAU for the Avengers without powers.

(Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6) (Part 7)

The next day Wanda got to school earlier. She made sure to keep her head down as she walked the hallways before first hour. If she was going to make sure that Clint and the others left her alone she was going to make it as hard as possible for them to try and talk to her.

She made sure to walk into History seconds before the final bell rang. Wanda handed Thor back his notebook. She had started with the notes last night and copied down all ten pages of his notes in a few hours.

“Thanks,” She said, trying to be kind yet distant, before Thor could try to say anything Mr. Coulson was starting class and Wanda felt like she had jumped the first hurdle of the day.

After class Wanda got up and was out the door before Thor could register that she was gone.

Biology was much harder. Wanda had taken her time walking to the room but when she got there Steve was sitting at their table, waiting for her. She smiled awkwardly, unsure of what to do, the only other open spot in the room was next to Tony, which didn’t exactly seem like a more preferable option. When she sat down Steve tried to catch her eye.

“I just wanted you to know that I don’t see being kind to you as some sort of job I got put up to.”

“Okay,” Wanda replied, her tone neutral. Wanda wasn’t sure if she could trust Steve, she barely knew him after all, she barely knew any of these people. Wanda had never trusted anyone other than Pietro and she still wasn’t ready to admit that she was alone now.

Steve left her alone for the rest of the hour. Her conversation with Natasha during french was very similar, though Natasha admitted that Clint was stupid a lot of the time, but added that Wanda would be stupid to ignore that he was trying to do the right thing.

Philosophy was more of the same, Steve lefter alone (so did everyone else) but it was after philosophy that Wanda realized that she was going to have a problem. She didn’t have anyone to sit with at lunch. Normally this wouldn’t be a problem, Wanda had always sat with Pietro or by herself (at her old school she had essentially been invisible) but when she walked through the hallway to the lunchroom and noticed people were watching her it was then that Wanda had somehow gotten mixed up with the most popular kids in school.

Normally Wanda avoided popular kids like the plague, unfortunately, Wanda hadn’t realized that they were popular, at her old school the popular kids had been the rich kids who could have parties and nice clothes or the varsity players. These guys weren’t who he would have assumed to be the popular kids, sure, Tony was rich and his dad was famous, and Thor and Steve were super athletic, but he could barely see them being friends with each other, let alone people like Bruce or Natasha.

However, before Wanda could worry more about who she was going to eat with Steve was next to her, “Are you going to eat with us?” He asked.

“Um...yeah,” Wanda replied. She could tell that Steve was surprised by her response but he tried to not look to pleased.

When they got to their table everyone tried to be nice to Wanda without making it too obvious. Wanda almost felt worse because of the fact that they were treating her like a rabbit that they didn’t want to scare away than she had yesterday when she felt like they were all pretending to be nice to her.

Maybe Wanda had over-reacted? Should she just let go of her assumptions and let them in?

No.

At least, not yet.

Wanda stayed silent for most of lunch, after everyone relaxed slightly the conversations started up like normal and Wanda listened quietly while she picked at the sad excuse for a sandwich she had made herself before leaving the house. She didn’t even like turkey, so why had she slapped three pieces of it on the bread she had found in the pantry? Wanda was so wrapped up thinking about her poor sandwich making skills that she didn’t notice when Clint sat down next to her.

“I’m sorry about yesterday,” he said, breaking Wanda out of her train of thought, she looked up, no one else was listening to them, they all had their own conversations going.

“Okay,” Wanda replied. She hadn’t really forgiven Clint for what he had said, but Wanda wasn’t exactly one to hold grudges - at least not outwardly. The internal battle Wanda was having was fierce. She had always been a fighter, but right now she just wanted to give up.

Wanda couldn’t help but think back to being at the hospital after Pietro’s accident. When Clint found her she was hiding in the storage closet bawling her eyes out.

“Um… can I help you?” a boy about her age asked. Wanda looked up, startled by the intruder before she realized that she was the one who wasn’t supposed to be here.

“Sorry, I just- How could I have let this happen? It’s all my fault.” Wanda sobbed.

“What?” He asked, crouching down next to her.

“M-my brother was in a car accident, he’s in the ICU right now,” Wanda told him, “They don’t know if he’s going to make it.”

“I’m still not seeing how this is your fault,” He said gently.

“I was the one who told him leave.” Wanda cried, “We needed milk, I told him to just go find some, so he did and then he ran a red light a few blocks from our house. He got T-boned and now he’s here.”

"Hey, look at me. It’s your fault, it’s his fault, it’s the other driver’s fault, who cares." he replied, “Sitting here is going to change what happened.”

“They won’t let me or our parents back to see him,” Wanda said, pulling her hands away from her face.

“Oh, well I can probably sneak you into his room,” he replied nonchalantly as he stood up and held out his hand to help her up.

“Really, you would do that for me?” Wanda asked him as she got to her feet.

“Sure, as long as we don’t get caught.” He replied with a wink before grabbing her hand and leading her out of the closet.

The two of them snuck down the hallway and around a few doctors into the ICU.

“What’s his name?” The boy had asked her when they got to a nurses station.

“Pietro Maximoff,” She replied quickly, glancing around nervously.

“Hey, if you keep looking around like you’re not supposed to be here they’ll realize that you’re not and kick you out.” He told her while typing into the computer.

“Right, sorry,” She replied.

“Room 324,” He announced, looking up from the computer, “Right this way.”

Wanda nodded and followed him down the hallway.

“You can’t go in, unfortunately because there’s a bunch of nurses right now, but you can look into the room,” He told her while they walked briskly, “Are you ready for this?” He asked her, glancing sidelong at her.

“Yes,” she answered definitively.

“Well, this is it.” he said, gesturing to the room number next to the door right in front of him, “You’ve probably got five or six minutes until his doctors come back.”

Wanda nodded and walked up to the doorway. She hadn’t know what to expect, but she figured it would be something like on all of those doctor shows on TV, that Dr. McDreamy would be bossing around people and her family would be able to go home by the end of the episode.

That’s not really what it was like.

I mean, there was a nurse who seemed busy enough, but she hadn’t realize that he was actually hooked up to tons of machines, everything about the situation seemed wrong and -painful-. Wanda could barely see Pietro’s face, there were so many wires and tubes connected to it.

After what had felt like mere seconds to Wanda at the time but must have been several minutes in reality she had felt the hand of the boy on his shoulder.

“We need to go now,” He told her, his voice soft.

“No.”

“If we don’t I’m going to lose my job.”

Wanda sighed and turned away from her brother’s body.

At the time Wanda hadn’t know that would be the last time she would see her twin’s body while he was still alive.

“No, like I’m really sorry about what I said yesterday, that was super out of line,” Clint replied, snapping Wanda back into reality.

“You were there for me when no one else was, you have no idea how much that meant to me, I’ll never be able to thank you enough.” Wanda said, dutifully examining the bread of her sandwich so she wouldn’t have to look at him, “It’s just...I haven’t really talked about Pietro since it happened. I can’t.”

“That’s okay, we don’t have to talk about. Just know that whenever you’re ready, I’m here - we’re all here for you.” He said, “Even Tony, especially Tony.”

“Thanks, can we just drop it for now?”

“Of course,” Clint said with a slight smile, taking a bite of his lunch, “How are your classes? Catching up?” He asked through a mouthful of food.

“Yeah, I’ve had to do work every chance I get though, these teachers really do not take it easy do they?”

Steve looked over at Wanda when she said that, “That reminds me, we have a Philosophy study group that meets every Thursday after school to hash out ideas and help with the essays and stuff, you should join.”

Wanda nodded, “Oh, awesome, that would be a huge help.”

“And we all tend to get together every afternoon at someone’s house to do homework and hang out,” Clint added, “So you have a standing invitation for that too, we don’t always get a lot of work done though, so just know that if you show up you’re going to get distracted any time you try to do actual work.”

Wanda laughed slightly, “Okay.”

“We always figure it out in the groupchat, Peggy interjected, “can I add you?”

“Um.. sure,” Wanda replied, quickly rattling off her phone number as Peggy typed it into her phone. The moment Peggy was done Wanda heard her phone start pinging and pulled it out of her backpack.

[phone] (12:42) Omg is the new number wanda???

[phone] (12:42) heyyy wanda

[phone] (12:42) Yes. You heard our conversation, please stop texting the group chat for stupid reasons.

[phone] (12:42) sorry peg. Luv youuuuu

[phone] (12:43) we’re all sitting at the same table just talk to each other

“Um...” Wanda muttered.

“Here,” Clint said, putting his hand out, “I’ll but everyone’s contacts in so you know who’s who.”

Wanda nodded and handed her phone over to him. After a few minutes Clint handed her phone back and Wanda scrolled through to see the names of everyone at the table were now added into her phone, along with a few that she didn’t recognize.

“Who are these other people?” Wanda asked, pointing to their names.

“Oh, those are a few of our other friends, they don’t have this lunch though. Peter Parker is Tony’s stalker, Sam Wilson is Steve’s best friend, Hank Pym is another science nerd, I don’t really know why we need another one but I guess he’s cool, T’Challa’s another one of the exchange students, Carol Danvers is a badass who can do whatever she wants, and Bucky Barnes is basically Steve’s boyfriend.”

Wanda was still trying to take in all of this information in order to make sure she’d remember who everyone was, “I thought Steve and Peggy were…” Wanda replied, confused.

“No one really knows which one he’s actually interested in,” Clint replied, offhandedly, “Well, do you think you’ll come over this afternoon? Study group is at my house.”

“Sure, it’s not like I have anything else to do.” Wanda replied with a slight smirk.

#avengers #avengers imagine #avengers fanfic #wanda maximoff #wanda maximoff fanfic #clint barton #clint barton fanfic #steve rogers #steve rogers fanfic #tony stark #tony stark fanfic #bruce banner #bruce banner fanfic #natasha romanoff #natasha romanoff fanfic

[harshabennur]

Everest Base Camp - A noob's journey

Day 1:

I am sitting on the floor at the chaotic domestic airport at Kathmandu, Nepal. March 4th 2017 was the day I decided to trek to the Everest Base Camp. In hindsight, I have no clue why I decided to do this arduous activity. I am fortunate to have met Jamling Norgay (son of the great Tenzing Norgay) a few times. Jamling motivated me to do this trek when I last met him on March 4th.

Before I say anything further, its best you know that I havent done any form of writing (expect emails!) in a long long time. If memory serves right, the last time I wrote more than a paragraph was during my B school days. So, it will be ideal if you set low standards of writing from this blog!

Also, pardon me if I keep going back to events before I started this trek once in a while. I do not know how tough this trek is going to be, but the prelude to this trek has definitely been a real challenge (I am nursing an injured and severely abused lower back).

I had initially planned to do this trek alone. Maybe some sense prevailed later and here I am with my office buddy Manu, both embarking on something we don't know how well we are prepared for. We landed in Kathmandu yesterday around 3.30 pm. While the immigration is smooth, collecting your baggage is a looong wait. A short 15 minute drive brought us to our stay for the night - Hotel Thamel. A small and clean hotel, ideal for overnight stay. Our guide - Durga ji was waiting for us to complete our paperwork - permit, flight tickets to Lukla, coordinates of the guide at Lukla, his fees, etc. He also gave us 2 massive duffel bags to carry our luggage. Once done, we stepped out to get some essentials - local sim card with 10 GB data :), sleeping bags for rent, hiking sticks and a few knick-knacks.

Strongly recommend the food at Thamel House Restaurant (a short walk from our hotel). A sumptuous dinner and tasting authentic local cuisine - done. This part of the city doesnt seem very crowded. The locals seem very friendly and speak Hindi decently well.

Durga ji had given strict instructions that we could pack a maximum of 10 kilos each in our duffel bag which would be carried by our guide/porter. This turned out to be a serious challenge. Despite being extremely choosy about what we packed in our luggage, it was impossible to fit in all essentials within the given weight restriction. It took us a few visits to the hotel reception where the weighing scale was located and removing more gear (some really essential) to bring down the weight to 10 kilos. I am really worried about leaving out few critical peices of clothing - have left behind 2 warm tees, one thermal inner lining and a pair of hiking shorts. We ended up not carrying many other important things - the long range lens of my DSLR camera, the camera bag which now leaves the camera vulnerable to damages, sports shoes for post hike moving around, etc. Not to mention, we left behind most part of the chocolates, energy bars and snacks we were carrying to make our journey more bearable. This task left Manu and me really frustrated.

Before I continue, our flight has been delayed due to bad weather in Lukla. I had read about Lukla's unpredictable weather, but was hoping we would be lucky. The operator - Tara Air/Yeti Airlines says there is a possibility of cancelling all flights to Lukla today. Obviously, this is not great news, leaving us helpless. Praying to the weather gods to give us a half hour clear window to make it to Lukla today.

Update:

Unfortunately, our flight to Lukla got cancelled after multiple reschedules. The low hanging clouds at Lukla made it impossible for planes to land on the short landing strip. Frustrated, we left the departure zone back to the check-in counter and received tickets for next day flight departing at 12.30 pm. This wasn’t encouraging because the locals say that the best time to leave for Lukla is early morning, post which the place gets heavy cloud cover. We headed back to the hotel and checked in for another day. Manu decided to take a separate room not able to sleep owing to my snoring! (our guide had put us on twin sharing). 

With nothing much to do, we decided to take a stroll around the city. Unfortunately, the entire city was shut due to Dussehra festival and the place resembled a ghost town. Durga ji called us in the evening suggesting we take a helicopter to Lukla. This meant that our existing plane tickets would go waste. Manu and I pondered for a short while and decided to take the chopper. We didn’t want to risk losing another day because our return date to India was not flexible. We had to head out at 5.30 am for an early morning helicopter ride. Thankfully, we didn’t have any preparation to do since we were already packed and ready. Another Nepali cuisine dinner brought an end to the day. After having 3 meals of the local cuisine, I am convinced that their food is generally very pleasant, tasty, largely non spicy. 

Day 2:

We arrived at the airport by 6 am and Durga ji’s friend there whisked us past the long queues at entry, check in, etc and parked us at the office of a heli operator. After a short wait and some paperwork, we driven to a far corner of the airport where many helicopters were parked. Some more paperwork and few safety instructions, and we were taken to the chopper. Both of us were fairly excited since it was the first time for us in a helicopter. It was a great experience to get a bird’s eye view of the beautiful work of mother nature. Sitting next to the pilot, I got a crash course on how to fly a a helicopter. The pilot even allowed me to get a feel of the cyclic (the joystick which acts as the rudder). Good fun! We got a radio message saying Lukla had heavy cloud cover. We were forced to land little lower at Surke and after a wait for about half an hour, the clouds cleared enough for the heli to take us to Lukla. 

Our porter and guide - Phuri Sherpa was there to meet us. After pleasantries and a quick breakfast, we started on our trek from Lukla to our destination for the day - Phakding. The trek to Phakding is not the typical trek we expected. Phakding being at a lower elevation than Lukla, most of our trek was downhill. Barring few steep inclines, we kept going downhill most of our trek. Walking downhill is heavy on knees. Manu developed a small niggle in his left knee, hopefully he should be fine by tomorrow. The trek was extremely scenic with the river Dudh Koshi accompanying us all along. Couple of long steel bridges and buddhist temples make for some interesting sights. 

A 4 hour trek brought us to Phakding. Our guide recommended a guest house which overlooked the river. The rooms are tiny, basic but clean. We were tired after trudging along the rocky downhill path. 

Both of us decided to do some stretches to relax our muscles. I was particularly concerned about my back. The last 2 days before flying into Nepal were hectic owing to official travel and last minute packing. I had slept for a total of 4-5 hours over two days. While the rest of me was able to function fine, my lower back kept giving signals that it was tired. 

I should mention that I suffered from a slipped disc three years ago. This lower back injury brought most physical activities to a screeching halt. My motorcycle riding, weekend sports, gym, etc had to be put aside. While yoga, physiotherapy and adequate rest did improve the condition of my lower back for a while, I have been guilty of not being persistent in my efforts. From a guy who could squat 330 pounds to struggle to bend down to pick up a pencil, it has been a tough ride. To cut a long story short, it has been a miserable 3 years from a fitness point of view. People who have suffered from lower back injuries will know that the injury affects your mind as much as your body. 

Coming back, we walked around the village after another tasty Nepali lunch. It is a village of approximately 50 buildings, most of them being guest houses for trekkers like us. The people from Lukla onwards look very different from those in Kathmandu, People here resemble the Tibetians. The kids here are like extremely cute and are like mountain goats. You can see toddlers running on the rocky path faster than us. A siesta and bowl of garlic vegetable soup for supper brings our day to an early end. Manu is keen to have a long sleep and is not impressed with me going typity-type on my laptop. Will try to add few photos here and call it a night. 

#everest base camp trek #ebctrek

[hopelesslydimwitted]

au for lion rescue/refuge workers bc i havent seen one yet

ok so the cast of voltron right, but they work for an organization that rescues/takes cares of wildlife, specifically lions for the purpose of this post

the organization is called Voltron Wildlife Rescue or smth

each lion they have is harmlessly tagged for purposes of identification for medication, treatment, rehabilitation, etc

each tag must be easily identifiable from afar

thus, ear tags that won’t bother the animals are colored! there’s black, red, green, blue, and yellow (obviously)

the organization was founded by Alfor and Coran, and their daughter Allura

they were world travellers and crossed seas and continents, exploring all there was to explore

sometime along the way, they came across a man Zarkon? who offered them a job that would pay them a lot of money to travel the world with his cargo: they refused when they found out it involved trapping, harming, and illegally transporting live animals

maybe Alfor had plans to take Zarkon and his company to court, planning to ruin his business and throw him in jail? maybe that’s how he died (assassination)?

Alfor was the business side and took to finding investors and filing all the legal work needed to start it up

Coran busied himself with gathering fellow veterinarians, such as himself, and other staff to help  

Allura was probably a teenager or younger when it all started, but her adventurous little self was so enthusiastic and loves every animal that comes through with her entire heart 

her father(s) required that she finished school before she could work at Voltron full-time

Shiro has been working there the longest, save for the founder's daughter/friend, Allura and Coran

he bonded very quickly with the only lion of the pride, tagged Black

Black was the first one rescued as a cub, probably from a ring of smugglers or poachers

Black has a prosthetic front right leg, much like Shiro’s prosthetic 

he’s not as social as the others, except for with Shiro and Allura

he’s known Allura his entire life, but bonded with Shiro after spending like an hour examining every nook and cranny of his prosthetic

Shiro started working at the rescue shortly after the accident that took his arm; Alfor had approached him and offered him a job

b/c Alfor had offered him a new start on life, Shiro mourned alongside Allura and Coran when Alfor died

there have been many times when Coran or Allura is driving around the land near the HQ and they’ve caught Shiro and Black snoozing together, the lazy bastards

occasionally Shiro is propped up against Black’s side, but most of the time Black is between Shiro’s legs with his giant head on Shiro’s shoulder

Shiro constantly finds coarse lion mane hair when he showers

Keith started working there shortly after getting expelled from college or smth

he bonded with the moody lioness cub with the bright Red tag

Red was as temperamental as they come, almost always roaring/hissing/scratching at the helping hands that came her way

Keith, the poor boy, was assigned to get her into a crate so that the vets could give her a check-up. they’d probably already gotten her in a closed-off area to make things easier when she gave the scariest, squeaky roar that a lioness cub could give

he popped a squat and sat right there in the enclosure, staring at her as she paced (and eventually sat down)

“I’m not gonna hurt you, I’m your buddy” he says, and various versions of that

he tries again once or twice and nearly loses a finger

after about an hour or so of this, he managed to get Red to her check-up

the next time Red saw him, she bumped against his leg and purred the way she’d seen Black and Blue doing to their humans

he won’t tell anyone about the time he almost pissed himself when he was sitting on the ground, relaxing under some shade with his lunch, and Red came up and curled up in his lap

he thought he was going to die, he even gave her his entire chicken-tuna-salad sandwich as a peace offering

he also won’t tell anyone how proud he is of how big and strong Red gets each day 

Pidge is the child of a veterinary genius that befriended Alfor and Coran

they like the runt of the pride most, a curious little lioness cub they’ve dubbed Green

Green was found malnourished in a circus probably, which is why she’s so small

Pidge calls her Smol Green Pea

Green hates it, yet finds herself responding to it

Pidge isn’t really staffed at Voltron, but visits the Holt boys a lot and explores around the nearby property

they let out the most pathetic squeal when they found Green staring down at them from the tree they were under, her big eyes locked onto Pidge

they thought they were gonna be lion cub lunch

Green just wanted someone to play with, and absolutely loved the flailing straps on Pidge’s backpack

Pidge is hardly ever seen without Green at her side, even when Green is getting a check-up

Green refuses to get a shot unless Pidge is holding her paw

Pidge can explore more of Voltron property with Green at their side, because let’s face it Pidge gets lost ALL THE TIME, too busy being entranced by everything around them or nose too deep in a book they’re reading while walking

Green is the only reason Pidge can make it back to HQ each day

there’s also a little rescued lilac-breasted roller bird that Pidge all but adopted

its name is Rover, and Pidge keeps begging their father to let them take the little sweetheart home with them one day

Pidge plans on going to veterinary school (early, mind you) and getting a degree so they can help Coran and the other Holts out with taking care of the animals that come in

Hunk helps out with the vets and vet techs, preparing special diets when needed and helping Coran to fix any mechanical problems that arise

he got closest to a pregnant lioness that came in with a Yellow tag

when Yellow was rescued, she was in poor health and the vets weren’t sure if she was going to make it, but thankfully Hunk was able to specialize a diet that started to bring up her health again

after Yellow’s health was good enough, they let her onto the main Voltron property, and just made sure to keep an eye on her in case her health dropped again

she stayed close, and often cuddled or laid with Hunk on his time off

Hunk went away for a few days near the end of her pregnancy, maybe to gather stuff that the vets/vet techs needed

the vets got worried when they couldn’t find Yellow, but figured it was just time for her to give birth (and altea knows they won’t test a lioness that just gave birth with a check-up)

Hunk was in for quite the surprise when he came back to his designated dorm room to a new mother-Yellow and her cubs

due to her previously poor health, only one cub had survived

Hunk took charge of nursing Yellow back to health after her delivery

everyone agrees that the most loving lioness of the pride is Yellow, mostly because she looks at Hunk like he’s “the greatest thing in the world, her light and savior, the best being she’s ever laid eyes on” (as narrated by Lance)

everyone else agrees w/ that

Lance volunteered for a summer at Voltron, hoping that volunteering at a Wildlife Refuge would look good on his college applications (he also took pictures with Green, much to her dismay, so he could show it off the cuties he wants to woo)

he absolutely fell in love during his time there

he was with Hunk when he found Yellow’s cubs, and helped him and Yellow nurse the survivor

her tag is Blue, but she responds more readily to his many nicknames

Beautiful, Gorgeous, Baby Girl, Babe, Sweetheart, Darling, Angel, Sunshine, Lovely, Light Of My Life, the list goes on

he was one of the main ones to nurse Blue, and he’s embarrassed on how protective and possessive he was of her when she was still really little

he wouldn’t let anyone but Hunk or the vets hold her, not even Shiro or Allura

“she likes things a specific way, it’s just easier if I keep her than to explain it all again”

he was only supposed to be working there for 13 weeks, but he and Blue bonded so close they were practically the same being

Hunk sent him a video of Blue crying for him, and that’s when Lance knew that he had to go back. he hasn’t regretted it since

he and Blue are Voltron’s Power Couple

whenever they go around for fundraising or to raise awareness, Blue is always the one they bring

sometimes Lance will ask her to do things (she’ll do anything for a treat, if it’s Lance asking), but most of the time it’s Shiro or Allura being “all educational and all that quiznak” while he and Blue are cuddling it out in the spotlight

everyone loves it 

Lance always gives Keith a hard time for how stubborn Red is with her affection, while Blue is all but connected at the hip

Keith gives him a hard time when Blue starts to become too big for Lance to carry around in his arms

i just want all of the lion cuddles, i have a mighty need

#lion rescue au #voltron au #vld

[raccoon-island]

I feel like I dont know the people I follow very well, so I guess I'll tell you about myself so you guys can know me.

My name is Juno. As of now, I'm 17 and I'm a Sagittarius living in America. I use they/them and she/her pronouns and I am pansexual. I've got a twin sister and an older brother, and a nephew who is about to turn two.

My favorite flavor of ice cream is oreo and cookie dough. I listen to pretty much all music, but I dont like rap and country too much.

I go to college for half of the day for a nursing degree. Im in my school's National Honor's Society and I play the trumpet.

I have an addiction to mint flavored things because they help my anxiety. My favorite flavors are mint and lemon. I like sour and savory things and I dont like sweets that much because I get sick off of them easily. I also hate grape and cherry flavored things, but I like grapes and cherries.

I really enjoy cooking and I love trying new recipes and cooking for others. My sister asks me to cook her crepes when we stay up late. She calls them "Juno's famous 3am crepes". Music is also a passion of mine. I think cooking and music are things that can really improve someone's quality of life.

My favorite Disney movies are Princess and the Frog, Wall-E, and Onward, and I can and will watch those over and over again. However, my favorite genre is horror and the Saw franchise is my beloved, as well as Babadook and It. I listen to true crime for fun as well.

My favorite games are Night in the Woods, Stardew Valley, SpiritFarer, and Sally Face. Ive never beaten the Enderdragon on a survival minecraft game. I enjoy horror games, but I get spooked easily by them.

I've been to Mexico and Jamaica, and I'm going to Mexico again in a month. I speak some Spanish (it does take me some time to form sentences and figure them out) and can read it relatively well.

Ive got a loving partner who is my world and my universe. I plan to move in with them after I finish college, or after high school if they move to my state.

I enjoy indie things (film, animation, games, music, etc) more because they were made out of passion rather than in a search for money, and you can tell they were made with passion.

My greatest fears are falling (not heights, but falling from them), loneliness, and not meeting expectations.

I used to have a reoccurring dream where my sister and I were trapped in a car that drove itself until we were stopped by police. During a moment where I realized I was dreaming, I started trying to drive the car myself. I eventually was able to drive the car back home. Since then, I haven't had that dream ever again. Its probably a euphemism for something, but idk what it would be.

I also used to have dreams that predicted the future, usually the next day or so. They occurred more often when I was younger. I havent had those dreams in a while. I havent dreamed much at all actually since I was a freshman. Now on the rare occasions I do dream, they usually involve me murdering someone (on purpose or accidental) and they are almost always nightmares that cause me to wake up crying or panicking.

And lastly, I have a habit of opening my eyes, sitting up, talking, etc in my sleep when I am absolutely exhausted the night before. My sister tells me about when I do this. She told me I once sat up, opened my eyes, read her the time (which I said a completely wrong time btw), said "I have to get up in 2 hours", and laid back down. Now my family has to ask me cognitive questions to make sure I am actually awake. Usually they just ask me what time it is because its foolproof.

I encourage other creators to rb and post fun facts about themselves. Nothing incriminating or personal of course.

#raccoon rambles #about me #tw murder mention #tw murder