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starglow-xx · 3 years

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retrouvaille

nakajima atsushi x f!reader

fandom: bungou stray dogs

content: hurt comfort, fluff

warning! : mentions of abuse

type of work: one-shot

synopsis: he left the orphanage, and that meant he had to leave you too; fortunately, this time, it seems like the universe was on your side

a/n: this is kinda self indulgent bc ive been feeling kinda down lately...?? and this has been sitting in my drafts for a while now and i havent posted in a while so killing three birds w/ one stone ig

the word retrouvaille is a french noun...

The moment you stepped foot into the armed detective agency, heterochromia eyes met your (e/c) ones.

You notice several agents talking and walking over to assist you, but you drown them out only having focus on the gray haired male ten feet away from you.

Said male takes a small step forward with uncertainty and disbelief laced in his voice.

“(y-y/n)...?”

At the sound of your name, your eyes immediately begin to water and with pure relief in your voice, you softly sob his name; the name of the boy who comforted you when you were both still in that wretched place.

“Atsushi...”

With all hesitation gone, Atsushi runs over to you shoving through his surprised and confused coworkers and wraps his arms tightly around you.

The force of the hug causes the both of you to stumble and harshly crash to the ground beneath you.

But the two of you didn’t care.

In his arms was a person Atsushi thought he’d never be able to see again.

In his arms was the same girl who snuck him food from the kitchens, the girl who stole medical supplies from the infirmary to treat his wounds, to take care of him when he was sick, and the girl who received punishment after punishment for insisting on staying with him inside his damn cell.

You gave him happiness in place where he should’ve never been able to receive it.

As if he ever felt like he deserved it in the first place.

You’re too good for him, but yet you still chose him.

You, his sweet and kind, his so very kind, and so very beautiful girlfriend, chose him, the cursed, good for nothing orphan.

The orphanage staff treated you considerably better before the two of you were acquainted, so Atsushi knew he was the problem. That he was the reason why tears would fall onto your beautiful face, why bruises and scars would litter your arms and legs, and why the staff would call you awful, degrading nicknames about you and or your virtue.

He had always thought that he wasn’t good for you, that he didn’t deserve you, that you could do better, but you stayed by his side regardless of his fears and insecurities, and provided him the strength and comfort he had always been deprived of.

And to his very surprise, he found that you found your own strength and comfort in him.

So he knew that you must of cried for weeks after he was kicked out, that you must’ve been devastated to wake up one morning only to learn that he was gone without a trace.

There wasn’t a single day that he never thought of you.

Atsushi wanted to go back for you, he really did; he wanted to storm into the orphanage with members of the armed detective agency, his new family, right at his tail before eventually reuniting with you.

But he didn’t do that.

Ultimately, he chose to leave you out of the mess that came with his job knowing that you would be eventually targeted and used against him if anyone found out about what he had with you.

So he kept quiet.

No mafioso, government agent, foreign organization, nor agency member had a clue about your connection with him, much less your existence.

He told himself that when things have calmed down by a considerable amount, he would go back and get you, with or without the agency backing him up.

Unfortunately, he knew that time of peace was far from the present.

But to see you, in your beautiful glory, standing at the threshold of the agency?

His original plan to keep you away from Yokohoma flew out the damn window.

At the sight of you, his heart did backflips and his legs almost gave out.

Ignoring the jelly feeling in his legs and the loud pounding of his heart, he raced around the desks and his coworkers—nearly fully crashing into Dazai in the process—to once more engulf you into his arms.

As for you?

When you saw him, you felt like you were going to pass out.

Your legs grew weak, your entire body was shaking, and tears started to fall down your face.

He was here.

He was safe and he was alive.

You mourned his abrupt disappearance from the orphanage and spent most of your time worrying about his well being.

The staff thought you were pathetic, that you sulked and cried over someone who they thought should disappear off the face of the earth.

They could insult and beat you all you want, but you drew the line when it came to Atsushi.

Finally having enough of everything, you planned your escape.

You were patient; you never jumped the gun nor gave anything away. You planned everything to the very last, minute detail, and after a few more months of abuse and waiting, you put your plan into action and left in the dead of night.

Thankfully, a kind old couple took you after you had collapsed in the streets. You worked job after job after job to return everything they had spent on your behalf even after they had told you not to worry about it.

And after another few weeks, you finally caught wind of your lost boyfriend tracking him down to Yokohoma through an old newspaper article.

Knowing your boyfriend, and yourself, you knew that tears would easily escape both of your eyes due to the long duration of your separation, but you weren’t expecting to find yourself crashing onto the floors of the armed detective agency curtesy of Atsushi.

But, you wouldn’t have it any other way because in your arms was the boy who gave you comfort during the most darkest days in the orphanage, the boy who laid you in his lap or on his stomach stroking your hair so you would fall asleep, and the boy who often threw himself in front of you so you would remain unharmed.

You choked on your sobs as you tightened your own hold on him and they gradually grew louder as you buried your face into the shoulder of his white button up.

Through his own choked sobs and teary eyes, Atsushi gently maneuvered the two of you so that you would be lying on his stomach—a familiar position the two of you would lay in back in the orphanage.

He gently stroked his fingers through your hair and softly rubbed your back as he whispered the familiar sweet nothings into your ears.

“It’s okay, I’ve got you.”

“I’m okay, you’re okay, we’re okay...”

“I’m here, just let it all out..”

Overwhelmed with your emotions, his sweet words only started to make you cry more.

You’ve missed him so much.

Your tears easily soaked his both his shirt and his neck, and you tried to speak only for you to choke up. Atsushi simply just started to shush you—as you would to a baby—and placed a kiss to your forehead as he continued to comfortingly stroke your hair and rub your back.

With the both of you off into your own little world, a world consisting only of the two of you, reactions and looks from the Armed Detective Agency went unnoticed.

It didn’t take long for them to realize the kind of relationship you and Atsushi had.

But what surprised them was Atsushi’s behavior.

The young adult they knew tended to be unsure of everything, including himself, and stammered whenever he was nervous.

But the young adult currently in front of them had this new aura of maturity; he didn’t hesitate to touch you or to comfort you, and for the first time they’ve seen in a while, he was sure of himself; he wasn’t nervous at all.

With the amount of comfortability Atsushi had around you, and the tender, loving care he showered you in, it was clear that you certainly were someone special to their tiger.

Your sobs slowly turned to small hiccups, and Atsushi’s face turned to one of pure tranquility and content, having his lover back in his arms.

Although having calmed down, what Atsushi said to you next made you want to start bawling all over again.

“I’m sorry I left you, and I promise I didn’t forget about you,” he whispered softly, “I thought of you every day. I still do. The thought of being able to see you again is what kept me going.”

You buried yourself further into his shoulder as you gripped his white button up in your hands.

“And thanks to the armed detective agency, I’m stronger now. I won’t let anybody hurt you, not anymore. That, I promise you.”

Actually taking a look up from you, Atsushi ended up locking eyes with Dazai, who had a gentle look on his face.

His senior only closed his eyes, tilted his head down softly, and lightly chuckled before opening his brown eyes once more, giving Atsushi a look of approval.

The gray haired teen’s eyes widened slightly as he looked around the room only to be met with similar looks of approval and gentleness from his seniors and coworkers.

He felt his eyes tear up again, but instead let out a relieved sigh as he tightened his hold on you slightly.

“Hey Atsushi...” you softly murmured.

Equally as soft, he answered, “Yes (y/n)?”

“...I love you...”

Your lover smiled before placing another kiss onto your forehead.

“I love you too (y/n)”

At last, the girl he loved was back in his arms, and the boy you loved was back within your reach.

And neither of you were ever going to let each other go again.

and it means, the joy of meeting or finding someone again after a long separation, a rediscovery

as always, reblogs and shares are appreciated! i hope you all stay safe! and just in case nobody told you they loved you today, i love you! you are enough! <3

writing belongs to me! please do not plagiarize! the reblog button is there for a reason

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vanderlindemorgans · 3 years

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Mr. Perfectly Fine

Rating: Teen

Pairing: Javier Peña x Reader

Word count: 5.2k

Summary: Two weeks after breaking up with you, you're picking up the pieces of your heart that had been broken by your now ex-boyfriend Javier Peña. You want answers, a clear reason as to why things fell apart. The only problem is that Javier refuses to even acknowledge your existence

Warnings: A little bit of period-typical sexism, but not much, Javier being an asshole, mentions of prostitution, some low level typical Narcos themes

Authors Note: So this idea has been swimming around in my head ever since the song was released last week. I already had a Bad Breakup fic for Javi planned but I’ve decided to extend it into three parts! Also reader speaks in English bc I do not understand a word of Spanish other than that one line in Ultraviolence. None of this is beta read, so there’s bound to be a few mistakes - if I get anything really wrong then let me know.

Part 2 | MASTERLIST

The tension in the room was so thick that you could cut it with a knife. From the moment someone walked in they could feel it, the stifling air of awkwardness surrounding every single person in the room as they pretended to carry on with their work, averting their eyes to the spectacle presented in front of them, a war of agitation rife between two agents sitting across the room from each other as well as the unfortunate Steve Murphy who just happened to sit between you two. From your end it was simple silent fury, directed right across the room to where your partner, or rather, ex-partner, Javier Peña was seated at his own desk, casually leafing through mountains of paperwork and suspect photos as if you weren’t practically shooting daggers at him from across the way.

He wasn’t doing anything, and that was exactly the problem - you wanted him to do something, say something, anything, if only it would show that he even gave a damn about the situation at all. But he never did. Every morning when he walked into work carrying a black coffee in his hands, his top shirt buttons hanging loose as they always seemed to be and his hair mustled as if he hadn’t been sleeping properly, he said nothing. He walked past you as if you weren’t even there, ignoring your stares and crashing down at his desk, ready to continue the endless chase for Pablo Escobar. And it infuriated you. Oh lord, how it made you burn. With every refusal of acknowledgement he gave, you became even more tempted to march right over to him and strike him across his stupid handsome face. You never did, of course, and you never would. Physical confrontation just wasn’t your style. Nevertheless, the mere thought of such did bring you a small bit of joy to your broken little soul.

Things had been going like this for two weeks now. You hadn’t expected much on the first morning back in the office after what had happened between you. A part of you wanted him to come grovelling to you, insisting that he’d made a mistake and begging for you to take him back. That in itself was nothing more than a fantasy: Javier Peña was too proud to grovel. If anything, his behaviour shouldn’t have surprised you in the slightest. He was the one who broke up with you over a 27 second phone call, after all.

Despite taking that into consideration, you thought by now you would have heard something from him. He’d have to talk to you eventually since you two were working the same case. Apparently no, because it appeared that he went out of his way to deliver every piece of correspondence meant for you through to Murphy, letting him act as a sort of unwilling middle man between the two of you. You knew that Steve already felt awkward enough having to be in the same room with the two of you whilst this was all going on, so your sympathy for him deepened when he was thrust into the even more awkward position of messenger. Sometimes you swore he made up fake meetings with Messina to attend to or new leads to investigate just so he could get away from the suffocating air of hate around you and Javi. And really, who could blame him?

You felt your nose twitch in annoyance as you trained your eyes forward to him, periodically looking down at various files of intel to keep up the facade that you were indeed working, though you eyes were across the room for most of the time, searching for any sign of emotion on his face. Nothing, zilch, not a single trace, his expression only showcasing general indifference, as if nothing were wrong at all. You gripped your hand tightly around the edge of your pen, thinking of everything you wished you could say to him. How’s your heart after breaking mine, Javi? For your information, ever since you pulled that bullshit on the phone, I’ve been miserable as all fucking hell. Before all that happened, I wanted to try. I was even ready to try to forgive you after that stupid fight, but you just had to make that call. You know what? I’d actually hate you less if you just acted like you cared a little that we broke up. But noooo, you’re just Mr. Perfectly Fine, what with your ignoring me and your casual cruelty, your always showing up at just the right time, and your insincerity, and the way you think everything fucking revolves around you. Well, I’ll tell you something Javi - I’m done! Absolutely done with you and your shit. Jump off a cliff for all I care!

“I’ll be back later on, gonna go follow up on a few leads” your thoughts were cut off by Javier’s abrupt announcement, your eyes gracing themselves upwards to watch him hastily scoop his jacket off the back of his chair and skulk his way out of the office. Every bitter word you wanted to say to him burned on your tongue, though you only managed to settle on a simple yet seething glare while his eyes glazed over you, rushing himself out of the room as quickly as humanly possible. You noticed Murphy look over his shoulder like he was about to say something but it was too late - Javi was already long gone.

_______

Letting out a low groan of frustration, you slammed the door to your car shut and threw your head back against the seats headrest, the stress of the job and the emotional weight of the day combining to make you even more tired than you would usually be at the end of a long day. Javier hadn’t been back to the office since he left, leaving both you and Murphy to pick up all the work he’d left in his absence. If that wasn’t infuriating enough, the thought of him running around all of Bogotá just to avoid seeing you brought your anger to new unreachable heights. It was annoying - him not being around should have left your mind to be free to do some actual goddamn work but instead, just as before, every single moment he occupied your mind, living there permanently as if it were his right. How much more infuriating could that man get?

Thankfully, the drive home wasn’t any more of a nuisance than usual, since the apartment complex you shared with the others wasn’t that far from the embassy, so that was a small positive at the very least. Once you’d pulled up to the lot you were feeling a lot more level-headed than you did before, and were mainly looking forward to kicking back in pajamas and watching whatever was on TV with the leftover pizza from the night before. It wouldn’t do much to take your mind off everything with Javi, though, you knew that much. Still, a small bit of bliss was still bliss.

Your apartment was down the hall from Javier’s, which had made it easier for you two when you were together but now felt like another sore reminder of what had been. Sighing heavily to yourself, you kicked the door to your car shut and stuffed the keys into the pocket of your jeans. A minor annoyance, sure, nothing you couldn’t handle though. You wondered if he would even be back right now. He had to be, right? An idea started to creep into your head at that thought, taking root and festering until you had practically talked yourself into doing it already, descending up the stairs with a sense of purpose behind you. Maybe if you showed up on his doorstep you could force him to confront you, make him look you in the eye. Any sort of acknowledgement to what you two had would be nice at this point, and if you had to take action yourself to get him to do it, then so be it.

The closer you got to his door the more you felt you should turn back, a feeling of uneasiness beginning to form somewhere deep in your chest. This might be a bad idea. What if you two got into a fight again? As much as you wanted nothing more than to hurl some carefully crafted insults at Javi and his stupid gorgeous face, you weren’t exactly up for a full on battle that could result from it. Would it be better to simply go home and ignore your problems a little more?

Once you were only inches from the door was when you started to hear it. At first it sounded muffled, on account of the fact that there was a physical barrier between you and them, and you weren’t quite sure exactly what you heard at first but when you pressed yourself closer to the door you could hear it all clear as day - a woman moaning loudly on the other side, whimpering out Javi’s name and betraying exactly what was going on within the walls of the apartment. You felt your breath hitch in your chest, the world feeling like it was collapsing around you from the very second you realised why he had left early for the day. Unable to stop yourself, you tore yourself away from the apartment door and ran down the hall to your own place, tears falling at a rapid pace that refused to stop. You didn’t know if the woman in there was an informant, or a prostitute, or some random chick he’d picked up in a bar after ditching work for the day. In the end none of it mattered though. All that mattered is that it wasn’t you in there with him, like it used to be, like it should be, and that fact made you hurt all the more fiercely.

Fumbling with the keys to your apartment, you choked on a low sob working your way through the waterfall of tears in your eyes to try and wrestle the key into the lock. Through your haste, you accidentally let them fall loose from your palms and onto the ground, prompting a loud “fuck!” to ring out from your throat, loud enough for everyone in the neighboring apartments to hear. Not like you really cared about that, to be honest. With your hands shaking, you finally managed to throw the door to your apartment open, slamming it back closed with a thud and leaning back against it with your head in your hands, slowly descending to the ground to finally give in to the wave of sorrow threatening to claim you.

You’d known his reputation before you started seeing each other, that he slept with all his informants and chased every woman who crossed his path in Colombia. Actually, it had made you hesitant to get involved with him in the first place but once you two had bitten the bullet and finally admitted your damn feelings for each other, Javier had ceased with his wild ways, becoming solely dedicated to you and you alone. And sure, you two weren’t together anymore, there wasn’t anything stopping him from being with other women. It felt like a deeper twist of the knife though, what you’d heard from behind that door, and it practically confirmed the sickening feeling that had been building in you since the first day back in the office after your breakup, when Javi refused to even look you in the eye and acted as if you’d vanished off the face of the planet. He doesn’t care about me anymore.

Moving on had been that much easier for him. While it took everything in you to get up each day, he was doing absolutely ok. More than ok, if the sounds coming from his apartment were anything to go by. He was even already settling back into his old reputation. You should’ve known it was too good to be true - the manwhore of the DEA, Javier Peña actually wanting to settle down with one woman, actually caring about a girl beyond what she could be in bed. You remembered the raised eyebrows when you two had first gotten together: for most, it just seemed so out of nowhere. You’d ignored them all, remembering all the times you’d be tangled up with Javi on the couch, his head nestled into your neck while your heart raced a mile a minute, hearing every sweet nothing and praise he’d whisper to you. Stupid girl, you should’ve known.

_______

After such a huge revelation, you thought things might’ve changed. In what way they would, you didn’t really know. Maybe the change would be sudden, such as you finally working up enough of a resolve to actually go confront Javier on his shit. Or maybe you’d take a leaf out of his book and start trying to seem like nothing was wrong at all, maybe go out on a few dates with some other guys. One of the Search Bloc guys had been eyeing you up every time he came over with Carillo to talk strategy, maybe you could go out with him. Though you knew it wouldn’t help - unlike Javier, who was actually more than happy with where you two had left things, you weren’t, and acting like it was just to throw it in his face wasn’t really going to work if he didn’t care enough to look over at you in the first place. And even then, the idea of falling into bed with some random man that you didn’t care for all that much in the name of moving on didn’t seem right to you.

Nevertheless, you expected some form of change to happen the morning after when you came into work to see Javier sitting at his desk, on the phone to someone you couldn’t care less about. But nope. Nothing had changed. You sat down and stared across the room at him, just like you’d done every day for the past two weeks, and he ignored your stare to continue with writing something down on his notepad, just like usual.

Maybe the change would be gradual, you thought, staring back over at the man in the midst of your ire with one of your coldest glares. And sure enough, around midday Steve had come up to you asking to retrieve something from the evidence room for him. Apparently he needed to look over something but was too busy with his own work to go fetch it - you knew on some level that his excuse was bullshit as it had been a pretty slow day for all of you but sure, whatever, if it got you out of that room and away from Javi for at least a few blissful moments that was fine by you.

Reaching out for the door to the evidence room, you pushed it open and admitted yourself into the crowded space, twisting around to slam the door shut firmly behind you. Before you were rows of shelves containing every bit of evidence the DEA had accumulated against Escobar - there wasn’t as much as there probably should have been due to the fire that had broken out at the Palace of Justice years before yet the amount contained in that small room was still impressive in size. Moving between the shelves, you scanned the rows of boxes looking for the one Steve had asked for in particular, taking your time with it as there was a small sense of serenity to being in that room. For once it felt like you could breathe. You didn’t have to sit at a desk across from your ex, you didn’t have to go home to your apartment that was literally across the hall from his, you could be alone and not feel suffocated by his ever-present shadow over your life. Though, in some way you supposed, your own memories could still prove just as suffocating as Javier’s own godforsaken presence.

As if by thinking of him you’d magically summoned him, the man himself strode through the door to the evidence room, appearing to be in quite a hurry however once he noticed you were there he stopped, his eyes widening for a fraction of a second before returning to their usual stoic glare. You could barely contain your own disappointment at his sudden appearance, letting your face twist into a low scowl as you watched him walk down the aisle you were standing in, his eyes dashing from row to row searching for any place to look so they could avoid landing on you. Anger bubbled within you, a thousand different sarcastic or otherwise snarky remarks coming to mind that you could throw out at him, every one of them becoming increasingly more scathing the more you thought about it. Letting out a small sigh, you forced yourself to push all those delightful insults to the back of your mind, not wanting to become caught up in any more personal drama than you had to. Get the box and go. It’s that simple. There doesn’t need to be anymore to this.

A minute later your eyes landed on the fabled box you’d been searching for, shoved into a corner and so out of the way you almost missed it completely. You thought of asking Steve what was in the box that he needed so bad when out of nowhere you heard a familiar voice speak up from behind you.

“Listen, I...about what happened on the phone a few weeks ago-”.

So, it seems Mr. Perfectly Fine has finally decided to break his silence. In an instant you twisted yourself around to face him, quickly taking in his serious expression and stiff stature before your eyes met for the first time in two weeks.“Oh, so you’ve finally decided to speak to me now? That’s a first. I thought you were steadfast gonna ignore me for the rest of my life” you spat, not allowing him any form of politeness or decorum in your reply. Why should you? He’d ignored you for weeks. He deserved this.

You watched as Javier tensed at your words, clearly not expecting the bite back that you had given to him. There was some part of his expression that almost looked sheepish in a way, as if he wasn’t quite sure if he really wanted this conversation to happen at all. “I wasn’t ignoring you, I was just-” he started with you rolling your eyes and cutting in almost immediately. “Save it for someone who actually gives a shit. Shouldn’t be hard since you don’t seem to care all too much yourself” you snarled, an action which only made him even more tense.

“I do care, and I kind of always have fucking cared so if you could calm down a little and stop getting yourself worked up we can actually talk about what happened. Can you do that for me at the bare minimum?” he retorted, a harsh edge appearing in his tone that indicated he was already becoming frustrated with your attitude. You knew Javi’s emotions like the back of your hand - he wasn’t a patient man, and he had no time for snark or sarcasm, though only if it was directed at him. When it came to himself, he was more than happy to indulge in a small bit of pettiness. You didn’t much care at that moment though: as far as you were concerned, he lost the right to a civilised discussion when he broke up with you over the phone and then pretended you were invisible for weeks. It’s not like things can get any worse than they are now, right?

“Oh, sure, sure, we can totally talk. How about I start then?” you fired back, every word simmering with venom and dripping raw with sarcastic edge. Crossing your arms, you leaned back against the shelf to take him in, from the creases in his tie to his tired eyes staring straight into you. Wait, tired? You didn’t realise it until then but he had been looking pretty tired lately, almost like he hadn’t been getting enough sleep. Then again, his sleep schedule had never been quite stellar, so that wasn’t totally out of the ordinary. And he was probably up all night with that woman I heard him with, you reminded yourself bitterly. “Look at you, so dignified in your well pressed suit, so smug and self-involved, so far above me in every way, so far above that you won’t even look me in the eye or acknowledge my presence. Tell me, Javier, has it really been that easy to forget about me?” you taunted. “Though I supposed when you’re seducing every whore in Colombia into your bed it would be easy, wouldn’t it?”.

Javier was caught off guard by your remark, not anticipating that you would go so far as to accuse him of returning to his old ways. “First of all, she was an informant, and I had to leave yesterday to go meet up with her. Things ran into overtime and that’s the reason I wasn’t back. I thought you of all people understood that gathering intel is a vital part to the fight against Escobar?” he replied, that last line at the end being delivered with only a little more underlying snip than the rest yet it was more than enough for you to feel around thirty percent more pissed at him.

You scoffed at his lies, your lip curling into a snarl at his attempt at patronising you. “Don’t patronise me. I’m well aware of the ins and outs of this job, in case you’ve forgotten I’ve been working with the DEA for eight years now, which is why I’m calling bullshit on your pathetic excuse for a lie. You do realise we live in the same building right? I know you were doing more than having a friendly discussion with her in there, in fact, I quite literally heard you two through the goddamn walls on my way back home. And before you try to spin some shit about how it was necessary for the case, you and I both know that fucking the informant isn’t a standard part of procedure. You don’t see Murphy bedding any of his sources of intel, do you?”.

“Murphy’s married, princesa” he deadpanned, throwing in that little nickname he had for you that two weeks ago would have made your heart flutter but at this time and in the context he used it only soured your mood further. “That’s besides the point. You’ve been acting like I never even mattered to you at all, and it’s honestly making me wonder if I ever did? Especially since I apparently didn’t deserve the dignity of a proper breakup and got a 27 second phone call instead. Tell me, when did you change your mind? I thought I was supposed to be the one you were waiting for all your life. Guess that was pretty easy to change, wasn’t it?” you snapped.

“Hermosa, can you just fucking listen for one minute?! God, you’re impossible sometimes” Javier shouted, that infamous temper of his rising towards the surface at a rapid rate. It was only a matter of time before he spat something out that he would no doubt regret. In your own haze of anger though, that fact didn’t register with you at all - you only saw red. If you had to scream back at him to finally pull some answers out of the man, then so fucking be it.

“No, how about you listen for once! I know we had that big fight but we could have just talked. The next day when you called me up I was ready to forgive you for being a complete ass. And what did I get instead? ‘I’m sorry, I think we should stop seeing each other’ and a dead dial tone after that. I can tell the only reason you’re apologising today is just so you don’t have to feel like the bad guy in all of this. So what’s the truth? Why were you so ready to throw away a whole relationship over one night of terse words?” you screamed, not caring that you two were at work and anyone could pass by outside and hear you two argue. With the way you both were shouting, you wouldn’t be surprised if the entire building could hear your screaming match with Javier. None of that mattered to you though. The only thing that mattered was the truth.

You weren’t the only one refusing to hold back in any of this: any lingering spark of politeness had vanished in Javi, his eyes turning dark with searing anger you had only seen in him a couple of times before. “You want to know why? You want to fucking know why? It’s because you’re a fucking pain to deal with. You may be a fantastic agent but god you can be so stupid sometimes. You’re too reckless, you throw yourself into danger too willingly with no consideration for anyone else. Did you ever stop to think what would happen to the people who cared about you if you died? Do you even give a shit about the people trying to protect you?” he confessed, fury burning with every word that came out of his mouth, his admittance making you flinch. It was just like he said during your last fight, the one that led to him dumping you in the first place.

Everything he said from that night came rushing back to you, remembering how furious he’d been at you for what had happened during your last raid together. You could see that underneath it all he was concerned for your safety, a gesture that was usually sweet but frustrated you that night as you felt something more akin to a porcelain doll than a capable agent in his eyes. Just because I’m your girlfriend, doesn’t mean you can treat me like I need to be protected. I can handle myself just fine. That was what you’d said to him that night, which should have been the end of it but somehow as the argument went on things got more and more heated that by the time he’d stormed out of your apartment neither of you could remember what had started it all.

What took you by surprise was that apparently he was still stewing about this, for some reason not wanting to believe in your capabilities as an agent and that alone made you more pissed at him. “I don’t need to be protected, Javier. I’m a woman, a DEA agent for crying out loud, not a flower! I’m more than capable of handling myself, I was literally trained for this! Nobody else here seems to have a problem with how I approach things so maybe the issue isn’t my method of attack but the fact that you’re a paranoid asshole?”.

He raised a single eyebrow back at you, looking somewhat skeptical of your claim but more so angry that somehow you two had managed to circle back around to the very thing that had started this whole mess.“Really? Because our last raid you were throwing yourself into the fray as if it were a suicide mission. It was a miracle you only ended up with a minor sprain to the wrist. Those men, the sicario’s, they don’t fucking hold back, one wrong mistake means the difference between life and death” he snapped.“And you know what? After constantly stressing over your safety every minute I was done. If you wanna end up with a bullet between your eyes, be my guest”.

The second those words slipped from his lips, he knew he’d fucked up. As the tears started to form in your eyes you could see him freeze up, his burning temper that had caused him to be so hateful before starting to slowly seep back, replaced with remorse and a hint of panic if you squinted. Although that didn’t matter much right now - his venomous words were rattling around in your brain, acting as a metaphorical hammer that took the final swing towards your damaged heart. Apparently what you heard through the walls the night before hadn’t been enough to break you completely, since there was still enough left of your heart for the rest of it to be shattered by his callous cruelty.

Forcefully swallowing down your cries, you wanted so badly to disappear from the room. You wanted to melt into the floor, to run away and go find one of Escobar’s men and gloat about all you’d done to try to stop him so you could feel the mercy of a fatal gunshot wound to the head. All the pain you had felt previously paled in comparison to the knife that cut you then, the tight feeling of your throat closing with every word you forced out. “So you were lying. You don’t care about me at all. You...you think I’m stupid. And reckless. And...not able to handle being here…”.

“Shit, princesa, that’s not what I meant, I-” Javier started, desperately scrambling to fix the mess he’d caused, however, you weren’t going to let him. He’d made his bed, now he had to lie in it. Any hope he might have had of making things right was now thrown straight out the window. No more chances. Not anymore.

“I think that’s exactly what you meant, Javi. Well, you got your wish I guess. I’ll get out of your life for good” your voice wobbled as you spoke, the next few minutes becoming a blur from when you’d pushed past him and ran out of the evidence room, hearing him call your name behind and not bothering to turn back to face him, running through the halls past different agents and members of the DEA, your hand shielding yourself in a pathetic attempt to save face. Somehow you’d managed to make it out to your car, throwing yourself into the driver's seat and jamming the keys into the ignition, your mind going in a million different directions. Your first thought was to go back home, though you knew that you’d have to hear Javi come back later, probably with yet another woman he picked up. You didn’t exactly have any friends in Colombia - with your line of work there hadn’t been exactly a lot of time to sit around and mingle with people, and truth be told you wanted to avoid people at all costs right then. Without any idea as to where you might be going, or what you were going to do, you pulled your car out of the parking lot and slammed on the gas to get you out of there, the world surrounding you not registering to you anymore and every sound becoming a rush against your ears that you paid no mind to.

One thing was for sure - you weren’t going to give Javier a single drop more of you. Your time, your mind, your energy, your tears, nothing. He’d already proved himself to be a lying sack of shit who didn’t care about you, so as it stood, you wouldn’t care about him either. Like the end of a tragic tale, everything had crashed and burned, and now that you thought about it more, maybe that was how things needed to be.

Goodbye, Mr Perfectly Fine. I’ve been Miss Misery for the last time.

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@greeneyedblondie44

#javier pena #javier pena x reader #narcos #narcos fanfic #Pedro Pascal #pedro pascal x reader

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semisgroupie · 3 years

Text

The Woman Who Used to be Mrs. Jones

Genre: smut, fluff (kinda at the end?), angst

Pairing: Aoi Todo X F!Reader

Word Count: 6.4k words

Warnings (some of the content can be triggering so please read through the warnings before reading this): cheating (in this Todo is the other man/reader is in a loveless marriage where her husband cheats on her/her husband is just a huge asshole), toxic relationship, sexual scenes, unprotected sex (don’t be silly wrap your willy), oral sex (f! and m! receiving), dirty talk, multiple creampies, bathroom sex, praise, risky sex (they fuck at a party the reader and her husband is hosting), mention of a small altercation between Todo and reader’s husband, mention of a child & brief mention of pregnancy (not detailed), if I missed anything let me know

A/N: I do not condone, support or encourage cheating! It is not good, don’t do it! The song Me and Mrs. Jones by Billy Paul helped me with creating this piece so I recommend listening to it while reading this. This has depicted sex within this so MINORS DNI (I’m not gonna cry bc I don’t cry but I am not afraid to beat some ass) So I hope you all enjoy it, comments/reblogs are very appreciated!!! I also apologize in advance if formatting is weird on mobile :/

Flashbacks are bolded & italicized! Also separated by a border!

Todo walks up to the counter of the cafe and orders the usual for the both of you. He came early since he was done with work earlier than usual so after paying for the drinks he carried them to the special spot you two shared. Once seated he takes his phone out to check the time while taking a sip from his drink.

The time read 5:45. You got out fifteen minutes ago and your job wasn’t too far from the cafe, so you’d be there soon. The bell chimed to the cafe and Todo looked up to see you walk in.

His heart pounded in his chest, you looked as beautiful as you did the first day he met you all those years ago in high school. Once you two made eye contact you flashed him a smile and made your way over to him.

“Hey baby, I didn’t think you’d be here before me.”

He felt his cheeks flush at the pet name. You leaned down to hug him and give him a kiss, placing your hands on each side of his face caressing him as your lips met. Once you pulled away you sat down and started talking about your day at work.

He couldn’t help but lose focus as to what you were saying. He knew your day was tough from how your hair looked a bit disheveled from running your hands through it, a habit you had picked up when you were extremely stressed.

Time passed as the two of you spoke about each other’s days and then you were both done with your drinks.

“Wanna go home now Aoi? As much as I love it here I found this new recipe online that I would really like to try out!”

He nodded as you both got up, tipped the cashier one last time before heading to your shared home. The distance was short from where you both were currently and when you two were together even one hundred miles would feel like two blocks.

As Todo put the key in to unlock the door he sighed in content. Once you both were inside he took your jacket off and put it away. He leaned on the kitchen island while you started taking out ingredients for dinner.

“This isn’t a dream right Y/N?”

It just felt so unrealistic to him he just had to be dreaming. Your laughter filled the air as you walked towards him. You wrapped your arms around his body and looked up at him.

“While we did this in the most unconventional way it is very much real” you removed your left hand from his body to put your hand close to his line of view, “this ring you gave me a few months ago is proof of our love and the ring I gave you on your left ring finger is also proof of my love and dedication to you.”

Unconventional? Was that even the right word to explain the events that led you both to where you are now?

You started your arrangement with him two years ago. You became “Mrs. Jones” a year before that. A happy marriage was wished to the both of you, but your marriage was anything but that. Six months after you both said your I do’s you found your husband in bed with his boss. They didn’t even think about trying to conceal their affair.

To say it broke your heart was an understatement. You felt like he ripped your heart out of your chest and destroyed it slowly as you watched. Soon there were lonely nights filled with you drinking and crying yourself to sleep. Soon after you just became numb, you got used to putting up a facade whenever your friends or family asked how married life was.

The only one who knew of the affair and how horrible your marriage actually was, was your best friend Valerie. When she first found out you had to hold her back the next time she saw him because she was just filled with rage. You were trying to find a good divorce attorney, but you just didn’t have enough money yet, so you were stuck for the time being. Then it was time to plan how to celebrate one year since the day you married him.

Valerie said that she would bring a special surprise for you, but you just pushed it to the side. You settled on hosting a party at your parent’s house since it was big enough. The fake smile you had plastered on your face burned your soul more than the cheap ring on your finger. A cheap ring that meant the entire world one moment but now means absolutely nothing.

You were leaning on the wall, holding a glass of champagne, next to your husband as Valerie approached you.

“Y/N! You look absolutely stunning!” she gave your husband a side glance as she begrudgingly said his name, “Declan... anyways I have your surprise so come with me to the backyard!”

Before you could say anything she grabbed your hand and weaved both of you through the crowd of people. She opened the door and you almost dropped your glass at the sight.

“Aoi? I thought you were away in Sweden?”

Todo brings a hand to his neck.

“I was but my job relocated here, and Valerie told me everything. As much as I’d love to say congratulations, I can’t.”

Your body moves on its own as you approach him and hug him. He holds you on instinct and all that is heard is sniffles. You move back and quickly apologize for your abrupt actions.

“Hey, don’t apologize pretty girl” he brought his hands to cup your face and wiped the tears from your face, “Declan should be the one apologizing, how could he take someone like you for granted. I know you might not believe me, but you look just as beautiful as you did when we were in high school.”

The two of you were high school sweethearts but got accepted into different colleges. The inevitable happened and you both broke up, heading your separate ways losing contact. The last thing you heard about him was he had a job in Sweden and that was it. After college you met Declan and he seemed like a knight in shining armor, but it was too late for you to realize he was the devil in disguise.

You leaned into his touch as if you two were the only ones there. Only if he was the one you married; you both would be so happy. You wouldn’t have to worry about any mistresses or affairs because even in this moment you felt all his love. Todo moved in and before you knew it you felt his lips on yours.

You melted into the kiss immediately kissing him back until he abruptly pulled away.

“I am so sorry Y/N. I didn’t mean to you’re still married, and this is the anniversary party and he’s inside—”

“I don’t care about Declan. The only one I care about is you. Valerie always says I should be a little selfish and now is the time. I still care about you Aoi, I still love you. The piece of my heart that left with you is now back and I’m whole again. I understand if you’re not comfortable with this, I am trying to find a lawyer and once I get the promotion at my job I can finally pay for one.”

You looked up at him hoping he would indulge you in one last kiss even if it would be the last one you two ever shared. You watched as a smile grew on his handsome face.

“I love you too Y/N, I always had and I always will. When Valerie told me about everything I cannot explain the anger I felt not only at him but also myself. If I never left then you wouldn’t be in this situation. Maybe you would’ve been with me.”

He leaned down and placed another kiss on your lips. Before it could continue Valerie ran out to the both of you.

“Hey lovebirds as much as I love seeing you two together Declan is starting a toast and wants his wife by his side.”

She rolled her eyes as your husband’s name left her lips. You took a deep breath and turned inside, Valerie and Todo following you. You took another deep breath as you made your way to your husband putting up the fake smile. He handed you a glass of champagne and started the toast.

“This past year with my beautiful wife by my side has been the best year of my life. Waking up next to her every morning is what fuels my fire. I love this woman so much and marrying her was the best decision of my life. Thank you all for coming and supporting us. Here’s to a happy, healthy marriage and for many more years to come!”

As glasses clinked and cheers filled the room you were filled with disgust at his words. How could he spew such garbage knowing it meant absolutely nothing?

“Come on honey, you can do a better job with that fake fucking smile. Make everyone believe that we’re in love and that I haven’t fucked almost every single one of my coworkers. Maybe I’ll even indulge in you tonight.”

“Fuck you Declan, you piece of shit.”

You excused yourself to the bathroom shoving your heel into his foot making him wince in pain. Todou followed you upstairs a few minutes afterwards hearing your sobs. He knocked on the door once, twice until your shaky voice responded.

“Hey it’s me, I wanted to check on you.”

He waited hearing your heels click on the ground until you reached the door to open it. You looked up at him with tear stained cheeks, eyes puffy from all the rubbing and wiping your tears away. Todo looked at you with so much love it was as if Eros struck him with his bow.

He quickly placed his lips on yours, the kiss feverish but also very loving. As if he was telling you how much he loved you each time his lips met yours. He picked you up and placed you on top of the bathroom sink, quickly running to shut and lock the bathroom door.

“Please let me make you forget about him. Please let me show you what it is like to make love and not fuck. Please Y/N.”

All you did was nod before placing your lips back on his allowing your hands to slide down and undo his belt. He allowed you to undo his belt and pants letting them hit the ground while he was lifting the skirt of your dress up.

“As much as I’d love to take my time worshipping your body we have to make this pretty quick beautiful. But please if you want to stop at any time stop me.”

You nodded at him as you felt his hand lightly graze your clothed pussy. He moved your panties to one side as he slipped a finger in, slowly moving it then inserting a second finger moving it just as slow but each movement made you moan and shiver. You started getting impatient and you grabbed his wrist.

“Please Aoi, please make love to me.”

He slotted his lips against yours again as he removed his cock from his boxers. Moving the tip against your folds making you both moan in the kiss. Once he entered you, slowly and gentle, you broke away from the kiss to throw your head back and moan. Once you gave him the okay he started thrusting.

“Fuck, you’re so tight baby. Just holding me like you don’t want me to let go.”

He moved faster hitting all the right spots. It was as if his cock was designed to fit inside your pussy. Both of your moans and groans filled the small bathroom. It quickly became heated as the mirror started to fog up. He started thrusting into you faster and harder making you throw your hands on the mirror for stabilization.

He placed sloppy kisses along the column of your neck. He lifted himself from your neck to lick two of his fingers and place them on your clit, moving them in small tight circles.

“Come on baby cum for me. Cum all over my cock and I will fill you up. I’ll make this pretty little pussy so fucking messy with my cum and you’ll walk around in that party filled with it. You look so fucking gorgeous baby. I love you so much.”

That sent you off the edge, creaming on his cock with a high pitched moan of his name. He continued pounding your pussy through your orgasm as he was nearing his own. You pulled him in for another kiss running your nails up and down his clothed chest. Feeling your nails against him made him reach his own peak, filling you completely with his cum.

Todo peppered kisses along your lips, swollen and puffy from kissing so intensely, as you both came down from your highs.

“I’m going to pull out now okay?”

“Okay that’s fine.”

You didn’t need to tell Todo to be gentle, he was already treating you like fine glass. He slowly pulled out and quickly moved your underwear to cover your cum filled pussy. A low chuckle left his lips.

“Don’t want you leaking cum all over the place.”

He lifted you off the bathroom sink after picking up both his pants and boxers. Before you could even smooth out your dress Todo did it for you, fixing any flyaways in your hair and placing one last kiss on your lips. He unlocked the door and helped lead you to the stairs.

“We should head down at separate times so we don’t look so suspicious.”

You nodded, placing one last kiss one his lips.

“I love you Aoi.”

“I love you too Y/N.”

You went downstairs and walked to your parents. You had a small limp and it filled both Aoi and yourself with joy seeing how your husband stared, completely confused at you. Valerie leaned next to you close to your ear.

“I already gave Aoi your phone number, go get that dick again.”

She lightly smacked your ass, a small yelp leaving your lips. The party went on for a couple more hours, lingering glances shared between you and Todo. When the party ended you had to figure out a ride situation since your husband drank way too much and you were a little tipsy.

Declan’s brother offered to take him back and before he could offer you a ride Todo came up and offered to take you home, to which you immediately agreed. The ride was filled with laughter and talk of memories. Also, when Todo parked at a secluded area near where you live you thanked him for the ride with a mind blowing blowjob.

He dropped you off in front of your place, being the gentleman he is, he walked you to the front door giving you one last kiss.

“I hope to see you again soon beautiful angel.”

“How about tomorrow? We could go get drinks or dinner.”

“There’s a cafe near my job, I’ll text you the address. Meet me there tomorrow when you’re done with work.”

You nodded as you fished your keys out of your purse. Taking a deep breath you unlocked the door and put your things away, heading straight to the guest bedroom because you refuse to sleep in the same bed Declan had all his whores in.

You thought he went to sleep until you heard a groan of your name. You rolled your eyes and continued going to the guest bedroom, ignoring him until you felt a hand grab your wrist.

“What do you want Declan?”

“What, I can’t touch my wife? You looked really sexy tonight so I thought I might do you the favor of fucking you.”

Fire burned in your veins. Every time you tried to pull yourself away from his hold, his grip got tighter.

“Declan, you’re drunk, and I hate you. Even if I was drunk I still wouldn’t go to bed with you, so make good friends with your hand or call one of your whores up because I will never sleep with you again.”

He turned you around.

“Listen here you bitch, you will never talk to me like that ever again. I did you the fucking favor of marrying your sorry ass now you treat me like this? I haven’t touched you in fucking months and this is what you tell me? Fuck you.”

“My sorry ass? Did me a favor? Did you also do me a favor by cheating on me over and over again? Did you do me a fucking favor then Declan? Rubbing it in my face that you didn’t love me the way I loved you, fucking anything that had tits and bringing them back here. I. Fucking. Hate. You. Rot. In. Hell. I don’t know what those girls see in you anyways, I had to fake almost all my orgasms and your dick has a weird curve, you should go see a doctor for that actually. I can’t wait until I have the money to divorce you and properly leave your sorry ass in the dust.”

You snatched your arm from his grip and locked yourself in the guest bedroom. You took off the heels and unzipped your dress letting it hit the ground as you made your way to the bathroom that was connected to the room. You took off the ring on your left hand flushing it down the toilet.

“That’ll be the last I see of you.”

You turned on the shower letting the water run, steam filling up the bathroom fogging up the mirror. You slipped your panties off the memory of your time with Aoi in the bathroom of your parents’ house filling your mind as you picked up the cum stained panties and put them in the laundry basket.

You entered the shower letting the water run over your body. After your shower you put your pajamas on and sent a goodnight text to Todo setting up the time for meeting at the cafe tomorrow. The next morning you woke up to an empty house, you let out a sigh of relief not wanting to deal with Declan after the stunt he pulled last night.

Your day at work went fairly quickly then it was the end of your workday. Inputting the address Todo gave you into the GPS you realized the drive was going to be pretty short. Once you found parking you walked into the cafe, the little bell on the door chiming with the movement. You looked around and saw Todo sitting at a corner side table, isolated from most of the crowd.

That’s when you started the arrangement. He was fine with being the sideman for now until he could properly have you to himself. Little dates and mind blowing sex filled your lives for the next four months.

~Four Months Later~

Todo was sitting at the table that basically became the unofficially assigned table for you both as he heard the chime to the door. His head shot up expecting you to come through the doorway. It was just an elderly couple. He checked his phone again, checking for any new messages from you and nothing. Just the last message that read: “I’ll see you soon my love”.

Today was the day you would find out if you got the promotion. With the promotion you would get a huge increase in your salary and a $2,000 advance once it was official. $2,000 was the amount you needed to finally afford the divorce lawyer.

Ten minutes passed and Todo ordered another drink for himself. To say he was nervous for you would be an understatement. He was fidgeting like crazy. He received the drink and sat back down at the table. The door chimed again and he looked up to finally see you.

You waved at him and gave him a small smile. Worry filled him and he was afraid to ask you how everything went.

“There’s no way she didn’t get the promotion. She has the best relationship with her boss and she works so hard.” He thought to himself.

You greeted him with a kiss on his head and sat down. He stood silent watching you.

“So I should tell you about what happened at work right Aoi?”

“You don’t have to honey, it’s fine.”

A smile graced your face, a genuine smile, the only type of smile that you shared with Todo since he filled you with genuine happiness.

“I got the promotion.”

Todo sat there in shock.

“What? What did you just say?”

“I got the promotion. I just came back from meeting the divorce lawyer to fill out necessary paperwork, that’s why I came so late.”

He got up from his seat and lifted you up into his arms.

“I’m so happy. I could yell from the rooftops.”

So he did the next best thing, he yelled about your promotion to the entire cafe. The people inside applauded you and gave you words of encouragement. The elderly man approached the both of you after Todo put you down.

“Congratulations to you young lady. This young man seems to be extremely proud of you. I didn’t mean to interrupt the celebration but it’s just that the both of you remind both my wife and I of us when we were younger. While we met under unconventional circumstances we have spent the past 30 years together. I wish you both a happy, healthy relationship.”

You both thanked the old man and watched him walk back to his wife.

“Do you think we’ll be like them one day Aoi?”

He pulled you close to him.

“I don’t think we will, I have a feeling I know we will. Now let’s go pick up your things and bring you back to my place to properly celebrate.”

He drove you to your house and walked with you inside to pack your clothes. In the midst of packing things you both heard the front door slam shut, meaning one thing: Declan was home.

“Care to explain the car in front Y/N? I know you don’t have enough money to afford a new one.”

You sighed and continued packing with Todo.

“I was asking you a fucking question -- oh who’s this? Why are you packing? Oh I get it now, finally got a new guy to deal with your shit? Good luck buddy--”

Before Declan could get another sentence out Todo walked over and shoved him against the wall.

“Don’t you ever speak to Y/N like that again asshole. For your information, she’s leaving you and coming with me. A guy who actually loves her.”

Declan stood there shocked that someone stood up to him. Once you zipped up your bag Todo left Declan to help you. Todo walked behind you with your bag in his hand. You turned one last time to Declan.

“Oh by the way I’ve been having sex with Aoi for the last four months and the first time was at the anniversary party. The reason I was limping was because of him not because of my heels. And you’ll be getting my divorce papers soon, go fuck yourself Declan.”

You walked with Todo to his car and he drove you back to the cafe so you could bring your car to his place. Once you entered through the front door he was on top of you. Placing sloppy kisses all over your lips and neck.

“You looked so fucking sexy there Y/N.”

He picked you up and brought you to his bedroom while you were peppering kisses along his neck. He put you on the bed and started stripping, you followed suit until you were left in your bra and panties and he was left in his boxers.

He pushed you down on the bed and crawled over you. Placing kisses down your body, removing your bra once he got to your chest and removing your panties once he got to your hips. Not one inch of your body was left untouched by his lips except your pussy. The place you needed him most.

“Aoi please.”

“Please what baby? Tell me what you want.”

“Need you—your mouth on my pussy please.”

He wasted no time. He licked from your leaking entrance to your engorged clit. Making you throw your head back.

“I don’t know how but you taste better every time. I’m fucking addicted to how you taste.”

He dove back in, wrapping his lips around your clit and using a finger to tease your entrance. He was alternating between light sucks and harsh sucks making you buck your hips against his mouth.

“Aoi please fuck me. Wanna cum on your cock please.”

He gave your clit one last suck and took the finger he used to circle your entrance and put it in your mouth. The feeling of your tongue swirling around his finger made him even harder if that was possible. He stood up and took off his boxers, throwing them to a random area in the room.

He spit on his hand and pumped himself a few times as he made his way back on the bed.

“Are you ready my love?”

You spoke breathlessly “yes Aoi, please.”

He aligned himself and entered you slowly, going inch by inch until he bottomed out inside you. A moan leaving both of your lips.

“And correction my love, I don’t fuck you” you furrowed your brows but that expression quickly changed when he pulled himself back until only the head of his cock was inside you and he bottomed out again in a swift movement, “I make love to you.”

He leaned down placing his forearms on either side of your head slotting his lips against yours. His thrusts slowly increase in speed. He breaks the kiss to praise you.

“My beautiful girl is so talented. You look so gorgeous right now. So fucking beautiful, I love you Y/N. I love you so much.”

“Aoi, feels s’good. Please I’m gonna cum soon. You fill me so good, like you were made for me.”

You wrap your legs around his waist and he slides his hand down between the two of you to rub circles around your clit. Your moans start increasing in pitch signaling that you’re going to cum. You bring your hands to his back and rake your nails down, digging into his skin, sure to leave marks. His ruts increased in speed bringing you to your orgasm.

“Fuck baby you’re clenching my cock so tight. I’m gonna cum so deep in your pussy baby. I’m gonna fill you up every single day because now you are mine.”

He emphasized each word with a hard thrust. He buries his face in the crook of your neck. Once he cums he sinks his teeth in trying to conceal the guttural moan that leaves his mouth. Coming down from his high he lifts his head up.

“I’m sorry baby I didn’t mean to—”

“There’s no need to apologize Aoi, I’m sorry about the scratches on your back.”

“Don’t apologize pretty girl, with how often we’re going to be making love I’ll get used to it.”

He slowly pulled out and you felt the cum leak out of you. He picked you up and carried you bridal style to the shower. Let’s just say both of you were lucky that the neighbors were gone for the night.

~1 year later~

The both of you have been together for a year and four months. Todo was by your side the entire time throughout the divorce preceding. Comforting you and supporting you the entire time. Once your divorce was finalized your relationship received an official title.

Both of you were extremely happy but there was the voice in the back of Todo’s head that gave him doubts. When he went to go engagement ring shopping with Valerie the voice was there.

As he picked out the perfect ring for you the voice was there. His head was filled with doubts. Of course he loved you, he loved you more than anyone or anything in the world. He knew you loved him. His love for you was immortal, unconditional but he wasn’t so sure if it was the same for you.

That voice in his head hammering doubts over and over again it made him nervous. He started to wonder if he should bring the ring back. If he should change his mind. It was that voice.

“What if she gets tired of you like her husband did with her? What if she finds someone better than you? What if she doesn’t love you as much as you love her? Could you handle the heartbreak Aoi? Could you?”

He started getting distant from you, less kisses in the morning, leaving without saying goodbye, barely initiating sex, it made you worried. What if he’s getting tired of you like Declan? You texted him wanting to meet at the cafe after work. He just sent back a simple “okay”.

Reading it made you even more nervous than before. When you were done with work you drove as slow as you possibly could to the nearby parking lot. You opened the door to the cafe and once you looked around you saw Todo there, fidgeting.

“Is he going to end things with me? We were supposed to move to the new house next week.” You wondered to yourself, you both had so many plans for the future but the future is uncertain.

You sat down and it was silent. He nudged your drink over to you and that was the most interaction you got from him since you got there. It killed you to not talk to him and it was killing him too.

“Y/N, I’m scared.”

You looked into his eyes and saw the fear within them. But what could he possibly be scared about?

“Aoi, what’s wrong? What’s scaring you?”

“What if you get tired of me? What if you meet someone better than me? What if—”

“Aoi. Stop that please” your voice started shaking, it broke your heart to see the man you love being plagued with such fears.

“Aoi, I love you. I love you more than anything in the world. You’re my love. You’re my soulmate. You make me happier than anyone in this world. You brighten up my day, the small things you do make me fall even more in love with you.”

You got up and bent down to hug him. You pulled back holding his face in your hands.

“Aoi I will never get tired of you. I let you leave me once and I never plan on doing it ever again. I love you Aoi Todo, I will love you until my heart stops beating and I will love you long after that. In every life I will look for you to recreate this love over and over again. If I had to go back in time I would go through this all over again just to be right here with you.”

Tears were falling down both of your faces by the time you stopped speaking. You wiped his tears away and he lifted his hands to wipe yours away. He pulled your face closer to his and kissed you.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry I’m so so sorry.”

He muttered apologies against your lips and when you both pulled away it was his turn to speak. You sat back down holding his hands above the table.

“I just got scared Y/N. I love you so much and I just can’t imagine my life without you. I look forward to the future with you, I want you by my side through every single endeavor. You’re my everything. You’re the sun that brightens my day. You’re the stars that shine through my night sky. You’re the air that I breathe. I love you.”

You stood up and pulled him along with you as you both walked out of the cafe. You drove the both of you home and once you entered you led him to the bedroom. Once you entered you undid his work shirt and pants stripping him to his underwear. You led him to the bed and sat him down.

“I never want you to question my love for you ever again.”

You kissed him and placed kisses down his body. Little nibbles along his pecs, a flick of your tongue along his nipples, slow sensual kisses until you reached the waistband of his boxers. You tugged at the waistband and he lifted his hips to help you properly take them off.

His cock slapped against his abdomen. You took it in your hand and gave it a few gentle strokes. You placed featherlight kisses from the head of his cock to the base. You took his head into your mouth swirling your tongue around it and letting it go with a pop.

You took your hand and spit on it using it to lube his cock for you and you started to take more of him into your mouth. His moans and groans filling the room along with the sounds of you gagging yourself on his cock.

When you popped up for air looking at him he could swear he just saw a goddess in front of him. Even with your saliva and tears coating your face he has never seen anyone more beautiful than you. Even Aphrodite herself could not even come close to your beauty.

You got up and stripped off your clothing. You pushed him back gently to lay on the bed as you straddled him aligning his cock with your pussy. You sunk yourself down onto him, he tossed his head back into the bed feeling your warm slick walls welcome him in.

You started moving up and down slowly before gaining a rhythm bouncing on his cock. You moved your upper body close to his grabbing his face and making eye contact.

“I love you—ah fuck—Aoi. I love you so much. You fuck me so good. You are so handsome. Thank you for loving me.”

You felt his arms reach around your waist as planted his feet on the ground to pound into you. Once he started jackhammering into you repeatedly hitting your g-spot you felt yourself cumming around him over and over again.

He used this position to pull as many orgasms as he could from you until he had his own and with how tight you were around him it would be extremely soon. You felt his cock twitch inside you.

“Please cum inside me Aoi, please please please. I need you to fill me up please I need your cum.”

He pulled you down and his hips lifted bottoming out inside you, filling you with his cum. You let your full weight go onto him as you were catching your breath. Hard breaths filled the room. You looked at him and kissed him again.

“I love you Aoi.”

“I love you more Y/N.”

The following week you both moved into your forever home. Todo made dinner and ordered your favorite dessert to celebrate the move. It was also the day that he was going to propose. He knew how much you hated public proposals and receiving unnecessary attention so why not do it at home?

When you were doing the dishes making small conversation on how you saw a documentary about female serial killers he got the ring and went on one knee.

“So all of her victims were just random men who had green eyes, isn’t that—”

“Y/N.”

You turned around and dropped the sponge in your hand. Your jaw drops at the sight of the man you love and the most beautiful ring you have ever seen.

“Y/N, you have made me the happiest man the past year and four months. Time with you has been amazing. You make me feel like I have been floating on air and I never want to come down. I love you so much. Will you continue this journey of life with me, as my wife?”

“Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!”

You bent down to kiss him and he slipped the ring on your left finger. A few seconds later Valerie called, already aware of what Todo was planning to do. You set the date of the wedding six months from the day of the proposal.

The wedding was small and filled with only close friends and family. It was the happiest day of your life and everyone preferred Todo over your ex husband, even your father, who never liked any of your boyfriends.

“I like this guy a lot Y/N, I mean I’ve always liked him.”

“Dad you threatened to hunt him down when we first started dating in high school.”

“Oh honey it’s just dad stuff but that was a promise and it still stands.”

“Dad! He’s not like that, he makes me feel like I’m the only woman in the world and like I’m a precious gem.”

You both looked over at Todo sharing a dance with your mom and when he looked at you, you could see your future in them. Wherever he would go you would be there beside him as his wife.

“this ring you gave me a few months ago is proof of our love and the ring I gave you on your left ring finger is also proof of my love and dedication to you.” Todo leaned forward and kissed you holding you in his arms.

“I never thought that one person could make me feel so loved and make me feel so much love for them Y/N.”

Now married life was doing the both of you well. Nothing could tear the both of you apart. Not even the news on your one year anniversary that you both were going to have your first child. If Todo felt like he was on cloud nine before then holding your beautiful, healthy son in his arms made him feel he was in seventh heaven.

A/N pt2: thank you all for reading this, I’m really excited about how this work turned out I hope you all enjoyed it. This is by far my longest fic so I really appreciate you reading it through. I have much more on the way, if you have any requests my ask is open! Again thank you so much for reading I appreciate you all! — D <3

#aoi toudou x reader #aoi todo x f!reader #jujutsu kaisen angst #jujutsu kaisen smut #jujutsu kaisen fluff #x female reader #tw cheating #tw toxic behavior #tw toxic relationship #tw unprotected sex #Aoi todo smut

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luckycheesefoodie321 · 2 years

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Reading Shadow and Bone (the first book) just confirmed for me that I’m a Malina shipper…

As someone who jumped into the series after watching the first season of the show, this first book is very slow paced.

It’s clear that the show combined a few elements across different books and the spin offs, which is fair enough and worked well but I did get a touched bored bc the whole middle of the book was just Alina training and being moody.

In the show, they threw Alina and the Darkling together A LOT more than the book, which makes him more sympathetic (also he’s played by Ben Barnes so my natural love of him warred with my overall dislike of Darklina)… which again not a bad thing and I already clued in he wasn’t all that he said he was, so it wasn’t a shock that he turned on her at the end… but he was also was very immediately into Alina from the get-go… in the book I was more convinced that the Darkling was the bad guy and was manipulating her because they were literally barely around each other and the kiss was abrupt and out of nowhere. He mostly seemed disappointed Alina wasn’t naturally inclined towards him and sympathetic of him from the beginning, but he seduced her and tried to reach out to her bc he was a tired near-immortal who wanted companionship in the ensuing centuries and Alina would be that for him (which they did allude to in the show)…

But the Malina moments felt just as potent, even if they portrayed it slightly differently and I was IN. TO. IT.

In the show we get to see Mal and his trials and he’s a lot more affectionate, like he’s already become aware of his feelings for her even if he had yet to accept them, until she got taken away.

In the book, because it’s from Alina’s POV, she doesn’t see any of it, even if there were hints of his real feelings in the beginning when he has a quiet moment with her in the middle of the night and tells her it’s always been them against the world. But when it’s just her, alone, dealing with the trials of the Little Palace (which were so much more expanded upon in the book - it went a touch too long but it really did a much better job of portraying her feelings and what she went through than the show did. I WANT MORE BOTKIN DAMMIT) you don’t have that moment in the show where you know Mal loves her and when she succumbs to her feelings for the Darkling bc she thinks Mal doesn’t care and you’re like “nooo Alina he’s coming for you!”

Instead he meets her for the first time, they get in a bitter argument that reeks of petty jealousy and underlying hurt and unrequited love but they’re both oblivious. Then Alina runs away and Mal appears to save her and has gone so far to defect from the Army and you’re almost not expecting it.

And then after weeks of silence and trekking, he can’t help but softening up and slipping into their familiar rhythm and intimacy, despite his anger and confusion and then he bursts out with all his feelings and his confession was so powerful I loved it. (Not to mention the freaking letter!!!)

And I’m so glad they kissed in this book. I was so mad they didn’t in the show but also I kinda understood it.

Anyway here’s some of my fave Mal moments!

Like: I know he kinda rolled over in his sleep to cuddle her and she let it happen, BUT WHEN DID THEY ESTABLISH SNUGGLING AS PART OF THEIR SLEEPING ROUTINE???? LIKE HE JUST NATURALLY RESUMES SNUGGLING HER

SO THIS READS LIKE HE KNEW ABOUT HER FEELINGS. that last line is so potent. Him just being struck by how much he missed her and unconsciously looking for her and realising she wasn’t there (´༎ຶོρ༎ຶོ`)

I do adore their dynamic. I always appreciate a friends to lovers. And him at some point realising that he’d had a read on her romantic feelings for him but bc he was ignorant of his own, he went off to be with other girls, and then when she was gone, he started kicking himself for wasting so much time and letting her go. That’s the kind of romantic angst I appreciate.

“SHE’S EVERYTHING YOU DUMB SON OF A BITCH”

I do like the True North imagery they put in the show but would’ve loved this slipped in there too!!

ANYWAY. CAN’T WAIT TO MEET MY CHAOS CHILDREN THE CROWS!!

#shadow and bone #leigh bardugo #grishaverse #Alina starkov #mal oretsev #reading #books #book review #Malina #mal x alina #the darkling #interesting move that they haven’t revealed his name yet even tho the show does it pretty quick

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yacoka · 3 years

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FIFTY FIRST DATES, AND THE FIRST REAL ONE

──⊱ for my one and only, wee to my woo, love of my life — @doughnuts-5ever

pairing — kuroo tetsurou x reader

genre — angst but it ends very fluffily i swear on my doggie socks

beta(s) — @sugasugawarau @taiyaki

kisses — hello i am,,, not back,, but here's a little thing that i did for my cow and it might as well be a valentine's day fic bc why not xoxo see y'all in a few days (psps sorry to everyone to has messaged me on discord or here or anything, i haven't been on tumblr or discord in a bit i'll be back sOON)

You sat at the dinner table, staring down at the meal laid out before you. It was by far the best thing you had ever tasted, and yet, it was bland. So, so bland and bitter, that you hated it. Nevermind that it was your favorite dish made by your mother the other day, nevermind that you always loved it better as leftovers. It tasted bland and bitter, and you couldn’t help but wish what he was eating tonight was too.

It was pathetically selfish of you - you knew. But how could you not feel that way when the man you loved was out on a date with some stranger he met on the internet? He had left the house in a burgundy button up that looked like it was made for him, paired with black slacks that made him look like it should be illegal for him to be out in the streets without a warning sign.

It was his first attempt at online dating after having miserably failed at picking up girls from school. And now here he was, out with some chick with a name you could barely pronounce, and the stereotypical description of her bubbly personality that loved nature and volunteered at the animal shelter. Oh, and lets not forget, she’s a gemini!

You rolled your eyes, stabbing your fork into the now cold dish. Stupid boy, with his stupid date, with that stupid red shirt, and with his stupid personality.

Stupid, stupid, stupid. That’s what you were for falling in love with a boy who never saw you for more than another pity project, the pathetic little thing that needed friends but never had any guts to make one until he came along.

You picked up the container of food and stalked over to the bin, dropping its contents into it. You weren’t going to eat it anyways, especially not after how you had massacred it.

After you left the dirty container in the sink, you flopped onto the couch, sighing heavily as you sank into the worn sofa. It smelled like Kuroo’s body soap, though from the amount of time he’s spent lying on this couch, it was to be expected.

You leaned forward, hand outstretched for the remote. Just a little further, a little more-

The door slammed open and you lurched forward, landing on the ground with a thud.

“It was horrible. She came into the restaurant and she looked amazing, but then we started talking and oh god, I don’t think I can be with someone who thinks that only the rich should be allowed to do whatever they want just because they’re rich.”

“Well hello to you too, Kuroo,” you grumbled from your spot on the floor, flipping yourself over to face the ceiling.

He jumped over the sofa arm, landing perfectly on it like he always does.

“I mean, how can I accept that? That’s just morally wrong and if her basic morals are wrong, what about other more important things? I walked out right after that, that doesn’t make me an asshole right?” His head popped out, brown eyes staring down at you. The cologne he wore tonight drifted down, washing over you and clouding your mind with its deliciously warm and thick and-

“I mean I did pay for the meal before I left,” he mutters, dropping his head onto the cushion, voice muffled slightly by it. “So it counters the fact that I left, right?”

The sigh that begs to pull its way out is caught by you, stuffed into the depths of your stomach in exchange for a soft pat on his head and words you know he wants to hear.

“No, you’re not an asshole. Maybe that was an asshole move, but that doesn’t make you one. Besides, her lack of a moral compass cancels out any asshole you might’ve been.” You combed through his hair, drawing it out of the careful style he had forced his bed head into. “This hairstyle though? It makes you look like an extreme asshole.”

Kuroo scoffed indignantly and his head popped back over the edge once more, brown eyes glaring at you. “I worked hard on this!”

“Doesn’t make you look any less of an ass.”

“The date was incredible.” He sighed dreamily, leaning against the counter with his chin in his hand. The temptation to throw your fork at him increased, and it took every sane cell in your body to set it down on the table instead, albeit rougher than you intended.

If Kuroo noticed your intensity, he didn’t mention it, instead continuing on to sigh and gush about the wonderful date he had last night with this amazing woman at this delicious place.

For someone who was incredibly perceptive, he could be incredibly dense as well. You wonder at his obliviousness to your feelings, to the poorly concealed hurt that peeked through in every little move of your body.

All you wanted to do was scream at him, to wake up, open his eyes, and see you.

You, who had been there since the beginning, who had watched him grow from the shy, introverted kid to this cunning, charismatic man who excelled and went beyond what had been expected of him. You, who had seen him at his worst, and still stayed, patching him up and helping him to his feet. You, who knew who he was to the core, every detail, every fact about him.

But it seemed he didn’t know you as well.

“That’s great,” you interrupt him. He glanced at you, surprised by your abruptness. “I gotta go get some work done, I’ll talk to you tomorrow morning.”

“Wait, did I do something wrong?” He called after your retreating back. “Hey, I’m sorry if I pissed you off.”

“No, it’s nothing!” You slammed the door shut, slumping against it. God, you were a fool to have fallen for an idiot. Dashing away the burning tears that slip down your cheeks, you gathered just enough strength to crawl beneath onto your bed and beneath the covers.

The cat plushie he got you a long time ago sits at the bottom of your bed, staring at you. You glared at it, before giving in and grabbing it, tucking it into your chest. Stupid Kuroo with his stupid face and this stupid cat. You hate him so much.

(No, you don’t, you really don’t. And it hurts so much more to know that.)

You’re back here once more, glaring daggers at the clock. The slow ticking of the hands pisses you off, every second gone is a second more Kuroo’s out there, with another girl, on another date. With the number of bad first dates he’s gone one, you’d think he’d give up. But no, this man was persistent, and he wanted to “experience life!”

Well, he was going to experience death soon if he didn’t come back home soon. Your vigil continued, all the way till three am where you gave up and went to bed, your exhaustion outweighing your annoyance and worry. He’s a grown man, there was no need to worry about him.

Honestly, you didn’t know how you got here. To this suffocating silence that rested upon your chest, pinning you down as you listened to the sounds of cars rushing past and the occasional laughter that seeped through the walls. To where you spent your nights alone in your shared apartment, waiting for Kuroo to come home from yet another date. Like some married person waiting on their cheating husband, you smiled bitterly at the ceiling.

Only you weren’t married to him, and you certainly weren't his anything.

If only you were less of a fool, you might’ve moved on long ago. Maybe you might have even found someone who might be just as in love with you as you were with them. You might have already been in a happy relationship, going out on dates, spending your nights with them, being loved. But you were a fool, a fool in love with another fool.

So you continued to lie there, the infinite weight of your one-sided love pressing you into the ground, holding you prisoner to Kuroo Tetsurou.

“Hey, do you wanna go get dinner?” Kuroo called out. “There’s nothing left in the fridge, maybe we could get groceries after.”

You ignored him, focusing on the dimly lit screen of your phone. There hadn't been a proper conversation with him in a while, and you were content to leave it that way if only it meant you didn’t have to hear about his dates with those seemingly perfect women and their seemingly perfect food.

Kuroo called out once more, and you burrowed beneath the blanket, curling up into a ball.

No, you did not want to get dinner with the man you’re so desperately in love with it almost hurts to even breathe in his presence.

The door creaked open, and you could see his shadow stretch out across your bedroom floor, casting its shape upon your walls. It took everything in you to tear your eyes away from it and back onto your phone, though it lingered in your peripheral, taunting you with the way it twisted and leaned closer to you, the scent of his cologne growing stronger by the second, until it almost felt like he wa-

“Why are you ignoring me?” Kuroo whined into your ear as he draped his body over yours, strands of inky hair tickling your cheek.

“Ku-roo-” you gasped out, fighting to twist your body out from under him. “Can’t- bre-breathe.”

He groaned into your ear, dropping even more pressure down. “Don’t care, you ignored me.” He sulked as he burrowed his head into the crook of your neck.

A blind kick to his legs has him flopping off you, spread eagle on your too tiny bed.

“You’re too heavy to be pulling this crap,” you snapped at him.

“And you’re too old to be ignoring me when something’s wrong,” he shot back just as fast, and you were left stunned. To be fair, you should have expected it, Kuroo being one of the most perceptive people you’ve ever met.

(Not perceptive enough to see the deep feelings you harbored for him though.)

“So what’s wrong?”

‘Everything,’ you wanted to scream. ‘You, those stupid dates, my feelings, every god damned thing on earth.’

Instead, what came out was: “I’m just stressed. Work, you know?” You shot him an unconvincing smile.

Kuroo frowned, his lips pinching as he stared at you. He knew better than to push you though, and settled with a curt nod, a forced smile slipping onto his face. “So…. dinner?”

You sighed in exasperation, and let him yank you up and out of bed. The way his stiff smile melted into an easy, fond one was enough to wash away your hesitance, and temporarily dam up the river of doubts that threatened to drown you.

Just for tonight, you’ll enjoy his presence, before he gets caught up in another’s embrace.

(You let yourself get swept up in him again, chasing after the ebb of his warmth when his encompassing presence surges away from you. But you find that you don’t really mind drowning in him, not when the peak of the surf reveals such beautiful sights in the form of lazy smirks and sly hazel eyes.)

It’s another failed date that sends him home in a fitted suit, one that you had turned your nose up at. Kuroo doesn’t understand what’s going wrong, why he never felt like the date was right. The people he had gone on dates with were nothing short of amazing, with the exception of a few. But they just lacked… something. And so he always leaves them with a grateful goodbye and an apologetic smile, returning home to the apartment he shared with you alone.

He’s spent nights and days trying to convince himself that they were an ideal candidate to date, listing out their positive notes to you, and somehow he can’t seem to find the thing that made him just click with them. It’s bordering on frustrating, really, and Kuroo is more than ready to relieve some of the building tension in his body by hanging out with you.

His entrance home is muffled by the sounds of music blasting through the apartment, and it’s a wonder the neighbours haven’t complained yet. He’s about to call out for you as he drops keys on the coffee table, one hand loosening his tie when he catches sight of you dancing in the kitchen.

And everything clicks in place.

It’s a stunning clarity that leaves him reeling, and he wonders how he could have missed it in the first place. It’s a simple truth: Kuroo Tetsurou was completely, utterly, irrevocably in love with you. And it only took him fifty bad first dates to realize that the only person he wanted to go on a date with was you.

Objectively speaking, you look like a complete mess, but to him, the sight of you twirling around in sock clad feet in an oversized shirt with a lame chemistry joke printed across it was infinitely better than any of the people he had gone on dates with. You’re absolutely perfect to him, yelling out lyrics to a song that’s blasting at full volume from the living room.

There isn’t a moment’s hesitation as he surges forward, a force tugging him to you. And like just like two opposing magnets, you spin around just in time for him to collide into you, his head hazy as his mouth crashes down upon yours.

You taste of leftover pizza and something sweet, and he thinks it might be the best damn thing he’s ever tasted. The shocked gasp that escapes you is swallowed by Kuroo as he deepens the kiss, arms winding around you to pull you impossibly closer. And he isn’t sure why he’s so surprised when you reciprocate the kiss, melting into him as your hands grip the lapels of his blazer.

It feels like an eternity spent wrapped around each other, the beat of the music matching the rhythm of your hearts, and the warmth of each other.

Kuroo pulls away first, only because rationality comes sinking back into his muddled brain, and there’s a brief moment of panic when he stares down at your flushed face, lips swollen from his sudden attack. But the absolute relief and love in your eyes has him calming down, and the soft peck you deliver next settles those doubts.

“It’s been you all this while,” his voice cracks, and he winces. “You’re my best friend, and I’m in love with you.”

The smile that breaks out across your face is everything he’s been looking for, and he feels like a fool for being so blind. You’re everything he’s wanted, and everything he’s needed.

“I’m in love with you.” He repeats louder, an incredulous laugh bubbling out of him. “I’m in love with you!”

“I’m in love with you too!” You yell back, and in his excitement, he can’t help but twirl you around, and you burst into giggles. There isn’t a better sound in the world than this, he thinks.

“Be mine.” He catches you by the shoulders, face alight with adoration.

“I’ve been yours for a long time now.” Your answer fills him with a rush of delight and guilt, and he’s ready to spill apologies and promises to make it up to you when you yank on his tie hard, pulling him into another kiss. Every unspoken word, every drop of emotion that has ever begged to be exchanged between you two is said with a simple kiss.

Kuroo thanks the heavens for you, for blessing his life with someone who is more than he deserves. The weight of you in his arms is a comforting pressure, and there he has his last first date, at the beginning of a new chapter in the story of him and you, eating leftovers and dancing to songs of your childhood.

He’s in love with you, and you are with him too.

#kuroo testsuro #kuroo x reader #haikyuu kuroo #haikyuu #haikyuu x reader

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realisaonum · 3 years

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book meme

thank you, jen @det395 !! i feel like this meme got away from me a bit, but no shame! i love talking about books and writing so onward ~under the cut~

1- how many books are too many books in a series?

mhmmmmm i guess it depends on the objective of the series, right? is the plan to have x number of books in the series and if so, when we finally get to the end will it be satisfying considering all the books we’ve read leading up to it? OR is the objective of the premise / characters just to exist doing whatever? both can be done well. i would say a lot rides on how much i trust the author.

2- what do you think about cliffhangers?

so this is meant for cliffhangers in a series like between books? i don’t really care if there’s a cliffhanger as long as i have the next book sitting right next to me. otherwise uh, only if the wait between books is tolerable, because at that point you need to know that the author can clear this mess up, right? there’s this other thing, like you know how if the entire series was already written, then they might release the books a month apart or a quarter apart - that could be alright too. but years in between? not especially a fan. is anyone a fan?

3- hardback or paperback?

jen, you and me are complete opposites here. paperbacks stress me out. i will go out of my way to buy a used hardcover if given the choice. of course, there are some publications i don’t mind in paperback —thinking poetry and super indie books that don’t have a hardcover release OR books where the spines are thin enough they won’t break and i won’t be holding them long enough for them to wear. hardcovers are sturdy and i don’t have to worry i’ll accidentally bend the cover in some damaging way. I am invested in keeping my books nice to the point that i create covers for my books out of kraft paper or brown grocery bags while i am reading them. this is something i started when i was in college and didn’t want these books i was hoping to probably resell get thrashed coming in and out of my bag for all these classes. My home library is probs more half and half paperback/hardcover but if given a choice usually it’s hardcover.

4- least favourite book?

i think it’s good to at least attempt to meet a book on its level. there are lots of books i didn’t like, but i wasn’t meeting them on their level and i know that so we’re ignoring those. i do however have a shelf on my goodreads dedicated to books that i have beef with so i’ll just go off on two of them.....

tana french’s the likeness for being plagiaristic shit. it is essentially poorly concealed alternate universe OC insert fic of the secret history. you’ve got french’s dublin murder squad folks and then this group they are investigating who bear a STRIKING resemblance to the greek students in tsh 🤔. this would be one thing. it is pretty well acknowledged that nothing is original and there are enough changes to The Likeness that MAYBE i could let it slide if not for this other thing: french’s book, the likeness, has lines that are just basically reworded quotes from the secret history and french positions these lines so they are said by the counterpart (essentially same!) character that gave them original life in tsh. i cannot stress this enough: you can HEAR how similar the sentences are and their core intent is always the same. it’s thinly veiled theft! it astounds me that French hasn’t been sued frankly. it is one thing to want to capture some of the genius that tartt’s debut novel holds, but it is completely lazy and disgusting theft to go about it in the way French did with this book. and YES the secret history was published before french’s book. if i could stomach how fucking goddamn boring the likeness was to read it a second time and cite every one of these offenses i would, but that’s yet a third strike against it—it’s too boring to be worth it.

T. Kingfisher’s second book of the Clocktuar War duology : The Wonder Engine. this is a book that i feel violated the contract between writer and reader. the first book feels almost like a YA book. the stakes while described as very high are treated, as actions unfold, as very low. nothing truly irreparable happens until the climax of the second book and the fallout of that action is so off-tone of everything that came before i felt deeply betrayed. no, like, completely betrayed as in it ruined the rest of my afternoon, i am still viscerally angry eight months later, and i will never trust this author again. sure, maybe none of those actions that led to the climax were out-of-character, but there was nothing NOTHING in the proceeding action that even came close to that level of consequence. it’s a pity because right up till that point i was having a really good time. the entire vibe of the rising action to the climax of book one all the way through the rising action of book two was just a quippy fun version of roadtrip/quest - it felt like a comfort read. the abrupt tone shift had all the subtlety of dropping a graphically, brutal murder into Blue’s Clues. you don’t do that - this is a basic tenet of a writer / reader relationship. i’m not touching this bitch’s shit again.

5- Love Triangle, yes or no?

not so much. i like jen before me will scream ‘just be poly.’ love triangles that lead into poly relationships? yes, awesome will be glad i read. but i am at a stage in my life where your standard will-they-won’t-they-love-triangle is just fucking pointlessly frustrating to me. an example: i read a Nic Stone’s book Odd One Out a couple years ago and something about the synopsis or the hype made me think that it would resolve the love triangle that way, so when that did not happen i was incredibly frustrated and immediately wanted to resell the book. it’s the potential of the thing. stone’s book could have been the perfect vehicle for opening up the concept of polyamory to a ya audience but instead just really squandered that potential with weak floundering — in my opinion!

6- the most recent book you just couldn’t finish

uhhhhh i’ve got two and i’m not sure i’ve entirely given up quite yet buuuuuuuut

fucking dune. i got really pissed off with this book. So just…setting aside the whole vaguing at a pedophilically inclined queer coded villain - it’s done so poorly, that it's almost funny? like it doesn’t (as of half way through) actually have any consequence on…anything at all and is tacked on like an afterthought to the end of his scenes. honestly it all could just be cut out entirely with no recourse to the larger story. So my actual beef with this book is the pacing is ATROCIOUS. like yo, not only do you expect me to give a shit about these Atreides cunts, when we just met them and we spend the same amount of time with them IF NOT MORE with the antagonist? but you also expect me to believe Paul was able to just convince the leader of the Arrakis people —the leader of an entire planet!!— with a single fucking sentence??? yeah, not so much. it was not set up for me to believe that Paul could do that! maybe if Kynes hadn’t died immediately after—or at least not died at that moment? baring the fact I thought he was by far the most interesting character, IF he had been convinced by Paul in that scene, it would have been great to see some actual work done around that - with a transfer or a liaise of power between Kynes and Paul and the Fremen. By not having any substantive scene that does it - it begs the question of what the fuck was the point of the character in the first place? unplumbed potential!!! over all there seem to be some key scenes missing to get the reader to where the narrative expects us to be? but the choices made of the characters we spend time with and the moments we see with them, the benefit to the larger story…is not always there. hey herbert, these words you have written aren’t doing what you want them to?? i feel like i should finish it but i reaaaaallly don’t want to :) the only thing i can say is it looks like from the trailer, villeneueve is giving space to these moments so that the viewer can foster a genuine connection with the characters? radical concept.

our lady of perpetual hunger - i started this one optimistically bc i like chef memoirs, but i am at the point where she has just given birth to her son and honestly DON’T CARE. i still haven’t officially given up on it yet since i actually fucking bought it like a dope. i certainly would not have if i knew how much NOT about working the line this was gonna be

7- book you are currently reading

Aside from the failures mentioned above, I am working on the second book in B. Catling’s Vorrh trilogy, The Erstwhile. Also very close to finally finishing Iain Sinclair’s The Last London - there’s a review of his work from the LA Times that goes “One of Sinclair’s greatest skills has always been his ability to take diverse if not chaotic source material and refashion it in a way that sometimes seems downright alchemical” which captures some of the wonder I experience when reading his work. His style and how he creates atmosphere and setting is just unique and astounding.

8- last book you recommended to someone

The Secret History by Donna Tartt. Before that I told my brother to read Eat a Peach, as we both love Anthony Bourdain and David Chang talks about him a bit here, plus it’s just a fucking great book. any book that gives insight into Chang’s methodology and paradigm is worth a shot.

9- oldest book you read

I think it might have to be Shakespeare’s Twelfth Night (which apparently according to wiki premiered on the stage a whole four months before Hamlet so that’s what we’re going with) and if plays don’t count, I don’t care. I think they count and that’s what we’re going with.

10- the most recent book you read ?

Given the previous question, the most recently published book, right? It’s gotta be the one I just finished: The First Collection of Criticism by a Living Female Rock Critic - Revised and Expanded edt., which like just came out this summer. I watched Jessica Hopper’s promo zoom, curtesy of my local indie bookstore, and went ahead and bought it. This was a great decision! It was just what I needed to read these last couple of weeks. i love there’s lots of short pieces that made the read quick and the fact that it’s non-fiction so there was no pressure of a plot or the emotional weight of character investment when I had a lot of big stressors dragging me down irl -it was such a relief. Hopper’s criticism is fun to read and there’s some real art in her appreciation of music here.

11- favourite author?

These are the top in a kind of order but not really: Donna Tartt, Jeff VanderMeer, Megan Whalen Turner, Flannery O’Conner, Chuck Palahniuk, Anthony Bourdain

Other faves very much worth mentioning: Emily O’Neill, Richard Siken, Brandon Sanderson, Warren Ellis, Nathan Englander, Stephen King, Eddie Huang, Carl Hiaassen, Anne Carson, and Iain Sinclair.

12- buying books or borrowing books?

Depends on if my library has it, of course! I nearly always see if my library has a copy first if i have never read it or the author before. If i’ve read the book before or trust the author, I’ll buy it. Like I’ll straight out buy new stuff from Jeff VanderMeer even though with him it’s either this-hits-exactly-and-is-my-new-fave or i-really-disliked-this-but-admire-the-boundaries-you’re-pushing-my-dude - so it’s always a gamble but a worthy one.

12- a book you dislike that everyone else seems to love

a little life (just bc it's torture porn elevated to art doesn’t negate the fact that it’s torture porn. Yanagihara’s project here is repugnant and the fact that this book is lauded as moving lgbt fiction makes my skin crawl)

sharp objects (good writing, compelling story, BUT typographical scarification doesn't work like that - i am not going to get into it but i know from first hand experience how Flynn described it is not accurate)

nesbø’s the snowman (what kinda dumbass detective would think THAT when a woman finds her missing father’s corpse? absolute idiocy - so obviously reverse engineered with that end in mind)

the raven cycle (fuck ronan lynch to start and then fuck him to end as well - there’s some other stuff but mostly he’s a total CUNT and if i don’t say that once a day i have probably died)

14 - bookmarks or dogears?

Bookmarks and sticky notes. Then I can place it pointing directly to the paragraph I last stopped on.

15- The book you can always reread?

This is my question because I reread all the time. ALL THE TIME. Books I reread often: The Secret History, Medium Raw (especially chapter 17 The Fury), Crooked Kingdom, The Violent Bear It Away, and The Goldfinch. Every year like clockwork (since it came out apparently) I will reread Stephen King’s The Outsider.

Other books I feel the urge to reread: VanderMeer’s Acceptance, Englander’s Dinner at the Center of the Earth, Frazier’s Nightwoods, Fresh Off the Boat, the Mr. Mercedes trilogy, the Peter Grant Series (which is queued up for another go here soon I think), any of the stories from A Good Man is Hard to Find, Sanderson’s Wax and Wayne Mistborn books, simon vs the homosapiens’ agenda, and there are two of Alan Morinis’ books on Mussar that I am technically always revisiting—when i need a reminder, i’ll jump around and read specific sections to get centered again.

16- can you read while listening to music?

Yes, but only ambient or near ambient (only usually one track on repeat) or a soundtrack I am extremely familiar with. No new music. I do usually need some audio stimulation or my mind will wander terribly.

17- one POV or multi POV?

Multi pov can certainly be done well (looking at the soc duaology and VanderMeer’s Acceptance) but working a multi-pov means there are more plates spinning, it’s more of a challenge, and some authors pull it off better than others.

18- do you read book in one sitting or in multiple days?

I don’t really do this anymore. that might have something to do with me picking up thicker books? but also i have a full time job now and let’s be real the book has to be hella good if i don’t want to put it down. the last book i attempted to shotgun was the final installment of my favorite series and it still took me two days so....i can get through a lot of books but none of them are ever in one sitting anymore.

19- who to tag:

@sybilius @mouth-rainboy @iwonderifthatisart @phereinnike @magnificentmoose @wambsgangs @moriarteaparty and anyone else if you feel so inclined!

Bonus Question: What’s on your to-read shelf?

As for me, I am excited about one i just picked up, Danforth’s Plain Bad Heroines, which i might start tomorrow and I will be taking Paul Madonna’s Come to Light on my trip to see my brother this coming weekend.

#this took a while but was fun #thanks again jen #very excited to read other folks responses #also like a general content warning? i mention/refer to things in the books but nothing's unpacked here #still to be cautious reference to mature themes #the narrator feeling posthumous

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koushisatori · 4 years

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Anniversary

First of all: If you happen to stumble across this, please cut me some slack and be gentle with me. English is not my mother tongue, and on top of that, I got rusty by procrastinating everything (literally) for the last half-year (*μ_μ) I am apologizing in advance if something is weirdly written.

This is also my first ever piece of fanfiction, so I have to get used to that to :(( So if you got ideas or anything, I’ll gladly try to fulfill your wishes to simultaneously improve my writing.

Hmm, is there anything else? I hope not, and if there is, I’ll add it !!

tendou x f!reader

genre: small bit of angst, fluff

warnings: none

word count: 2.7k

note: /

__________________________________________________________

usually, your relationship with Tendou is smooth sailing, both of you decided to take the step of moving in together relatively early, exceeding the common couples limit by not only doing this barely a year into your relationship but doing so in a different country far from your family and friends

(both of you learning french together to survive a new life in an absolutely foreign country...however, the first months of grocery shopping were disastrous )

you both became a couple in your last year at Shiratorizawa, surprising absolutely....well,...no one, honestly

every person just seeing a moment of your interactions with each other would have guessed that you already were dating

Tendou and you were the embodiment of being disgustingly in love - like people see you and feel s i n g l e wanting to have what you two obviously found with the other

(SemiSemi, to this day, shudders violently thinking about how he caught you two making out in the storage room a week after Tendou finally confessed to you <3)

anyway

while Tendou followed his dream of becoming a chocolatier, you began to study - enter: stress

after finishing his required training he got a job at a high-class factory (everything his handmade and super expensive?? You’re just so lucky to be his better half and get to taste his creations for free)

they value his skills and invest in him to become better, but that also means that his time for you shrank even more

you understood that, of course, and it's not like you didn’t spend a lot of your times crouching over books either with being close to receiving your first degree

in general, your fights are stressed-induced, and as quickly forgotten as they came up bc...let’s not beat around the bush, both of you are shit at staying mad at the other, especially if it means cutting short the already sparse time you currently have <3

they’re usually about petty stuff, too

recently though it happens more regularly and they ever so slowly started to border on painful

he stays at work for longer to perfect his already otherworldly skills; and your patience is running thin with all the deadlines and exams putting immense pressure on you

both of you are just so unsatisfied and stressed and...so fucking tired

it’s always forgivable though

you don’t mind planned dinner dates turning into movie nights with him falling asleep on you after what feels like seconds

because he’s there, pressing his face into your side or stomach hard enough for you to wonder if he’s trying to suffocate himself, while his long arms are around your waist holding onto you as if his life depends on it

he doesn’t mind being splayed across your lap watching the latest episodes of his series while you type away on your laptop, even though you were supposed to enjoy a nice weekend lazying in front of the tv with him

a forgotten date hasn’t killed you yet as well, but the amount of times it was currently happening allowed insecurities to have their way with you

both of you always make up for it one way or another (leaving an apology breakfast or even taking it to bed, buying flowers, sharing the sweet kisses you were supposed to enjoy the night before,...)

but this time, he didn’t just forget to be on time for any date.

he completely missed your anniversary

you spend the whole afternoon cooking his favorite dish for dinner, making yourself all pretty for him, wearing the jewelry he got you for your birthday, it was some kind of tradition by now

just to be stood up, dinner turning cold and your mood sour

no message, no callback

around 11pm he - finally ! - gets in touch with you

‘‘(Y/N)!! Bunny, did something happen? Did you miss me so much?’’

you could hear the dopey grin he was wearing while teasing you, one you usually loved, one that was contagious

but it didn’t help the pain and disappointment nesting in your heart, right now

he really didn’t remember

was the date so insignificant to him? were you no longer a priority?

you swallow around the lump in your throat, desperately begging your brain to not amplify your insecurities even more

‘’No...it’s...it’s alright, I just wanted to know when you’re home...’’ your attempt to keep the doubts and pain you experienced that second hidden was pointless, because even on the phone, your boyfriend was able to look right through you

‘‘Bunny what’s wrong?’’ he asks worriedly

normally you’d say that it was alright, that you’d speak later or directly say what was bugging you so terribly

this time...you didn’t feel like talking or maybe even fighting, scared that he might confirm your thoughts and leave you

‘’It’s nothing, Tendou,...’’ you hear him wince, you can’t remember the last time you called him that ’’don’t bother with me if it’s not as important to you.’’

‘‘Not as...’’ a moment of silence follows, in which he checked the date and, lastly, Tendou understood ‘’Oh. Oh shit, (Y/N),...Bunny, please, wait for me, please, let me explain...’‘

It’s not the answer you wanted (on the other hand, what answer would that be?)

‘‘I waited...and I’m tired,’‘ you add without thinking, hanging up before he even got the chance to answer

while you don’t want things to end...you can’t help but think ‘what if?’ - that thought alone though is enough for the dams to burst

With a soft groan, you blink your burning eyes open, noticing your spine protesting and pop from the uncomfortable position you fell asleep in. A glance at the alarm clock elicited another tired groan, the 4 on display mocking you.

The burning and overall sluggish feeling controlling your body immediately reminded you of the things that had taken place. That his scent surrounding you arose solely due to his pillow in which you had pressed your face.

While you obviously weren’t on the best of terms right now, a small part of you was still hopeful and reached out across the bed in search for the warmth your red-haired better half usually provided. Unsurprisingly, your hand met a cold bed half.

An annoyed sigh later, you sat up and rubbed over your eyes angrily. You were hurt, which should be understandable, but remembering his overly happy tone even with evident tiredness underlaying it, you guessed that he didn’t stay behind on purpose and that, maybe, something good had happened. So to say, you as well behaved like an idiot.

Suddenly, you remember the last sentence you said. Realizing what it implied, you felt like banging your head against the wall. You wanted to be understood by him. What you didn’t want was to give Satori the time to allow his anxious tendencies to fester while he was alone, foregoing untrue, negative ideas. The fact that he still wasn’t in bed with you, was proof enough which lead to you cursing out loud.

While your last words towards him told something differently, you surely didn’t want to leave him or him to leave you. Both of you could work things out, you always did, and…well, you always hoped that it would stay that way until you had lived a fulfilling life as a couple, with grey hair and wrinkles taking your last breath together wherever life would lead the two of you.

The simple solution was to communicate like the grown adults you are.

Determined to talk through it the way you should have done earlier and maybe...just maybe get some cuddles afterward, you swung your legs out from under the blankets. After you quickly put on some warm, worn-out socks, you quietly leave the bedroom and tip-toe through the hallway.

You expected the apartment to be silent, to be dark. What you didn’t expect is the soft light coming from your shared kitchen. Or the clinking noises of bowls and pots colliding lightly, lowly muttered, sleepy curses, and even quieter sniffles interrupting the barrage of words from time to time.

Upon hearing those little sounds - no doubt coming from your anxious boyfriend - your heart clenched painfully in your chest. This is your injudicious doing. Straightening your back, you stepped into the kitchen, slightly squinting against the much harsher ceiling lights assaulting your eyes.

The original plan was to offer a heartfelt apology, and follow it up by an honest declaration of love and the proposal to talk about everything. There were a lot of things that needed to be cleared up between you and Tendou. But after entering the kitchen, you came to an abrupt halt.

Your eyes wandered, lingering on cuts, burns, and blisters that blemished your boyfriends' pretty fingers. Slowly, your gaze continued to move up his arms and shoulders, tensed and screaming out his fear of losing you. For a moment, you hesitated, but you eventually lifted your gaze to meet his wide eyes, as red-rimmed and puffy as yours. He looked like a deer caught in headlights. Normally, you would find it adorable and stretch your hands out to cup his cheeks (not to pull him down, definitely not) and press a kiss to his lips...but right now? You really just felt like crying, seeing your Satori so heartbroken over something you said carelessly in the heat of the moment.

Suddenly wincing, Tendou quickly pulls back his hand to his chest away from the hot stove. Yet, he did not dare to break eye contact with you. Seemingly afraid that what he currently saw is nothing but a sleep-deprivation induced hallucination. That you would just vanish if he so much dared to even think of blinking.

The stupor rooting you to the spot though vanished in favor of closing the gap between the two of you to help him.

‘‘Tori...’‘ you croaked worriedly, eyes flickering down to his hands and back up to his watery, sad eyes. ‘‘I’m so sorry,’’ you whispered. Any louder and your voice might break. ’’...let me take care of you.’‘

You turned off the stove before you gently tugged Tendou behind you to the bathroom. Making him sit on the edge of the small tub, you gathered everything you needed to patch him up with rehearsed movements.

For a while, both of you were silent.

You carefully worked on disinfecting cuts and putting special creams on the different wounds and burns, while not hurting him any further. Concentrating on ignoring the thick tension of untold apologies, and fear. Doubt weighing heavy on the two of you.

Meanwhile, Tendou couldn't help but admire your features. Your soft hair - faintly smelling like peaches and anis - falling into your face, hiding away your pretty (Y/E/C) eyes. He loved to get lost in them. Or how your tongue poked out between your lips in concentration and the little scrunch of your nose when you thought that you could have done better.

Even in this hazy state of mind, he knew for certain that he would try to hold onto you for as long as possible. That he would do anything to make you forgive him.

After you finished gently wrapping band-aids (silly ones with colorful patterns just the way you both love) around his fingers, on his palm, and back of his hand, he quickly moved them to hold onto yours.

‘‘Don’t leave me.’‘ Tendou's voice is just above a whisper, and if you wouldn't have been that close to him as you were, you would have missed it. But you could hear him, and your eyes immediately met his, filling with tears all over again.

‘‘Satori, I’m-’‘

‘‘(Y/N), please...please, don’t leave me. I’m so sorry. Of course, I care. Our relationship, you...nothing’s as important to me as you are. It was the only thing keeping me sane that last week. I don't know why I forgot about it. I truly feel horrible.'' he started. ''Please, believe me. I love you so, so much. I...I can’t imagine a life without you. I don’t want to.’’ Even with his voice quivering, it was crystal clear just how serious his words were to him.

He needed to get it out in the open. There was no way in hell that he would allow any doubts about your relationship to fester in your mind.

‘’I was held back to talk about the upcoming Christmas preparations that I’m supposed to be leading this year, and then I was called into the boss’ office and I couldn’t check my phone,’‘ the desperation to explain still evident, Tendou resorted to rambling about the happenings of the day.

‘‘I’m sorry for hurting you, but Bunny, I beg you...I know that we haven't had enough time those last weeks, that we didn't have any if we’re honest. I understand that you must feel neglected. I will change that, give me a chance to make you forgive me, please.’‘

It wasn’t like you wanted to cry again, but the tears rolling down your cheeks seemed to have a mind on their own. ‘’ ‘Tori...’’ you sniffled, your voice breaking away at the last syllable. ‘’Can I hug you?’’

The relief on his face spoke volumes, and before you even got the chance to make good on your words, he already stands tall in front of you, enveloping you tightly.

Securely wrapped up in Satoris’ arms, you feel like coming home after months away. Or like taking in the first gasp of fresh air after holding your breath underwater for too long. With Tendou holding onto you like this, you found the strength to answer.

''I'm sorry, too...I love you so much, and...I know you always have a reason, and it was childish to hang up on you and leave you worrying alone instead of talking to you. And...if you neglected me those last weeks, then I did the same. We both were too busy for each other...''

After a short pause, you ask: ''B-but we can work it out, right?’’ Slowly, you looked up to him. ‘’I want to spend my life with you, Satori. Don’t listen to dumb me 5 hours earlier. 5-hours-ago-me was so stupid, and petty, and does not reflect my true wishes,’’ you added. ’’No one of our old friends wanted to put up with me the last week because I’m so head over heels in love with you and all I do is tell them ‘’You should have seen what Tori did for me’’ and what I plan to do for you...I can feel them roll their eyes from the other side of the world!’’

Suddenly aware of your very honest words, you pushed your face against his chest to hide your burning cheeks. Embarrassment painting them in a pretty hue of pink.

Tendou hadn't realized that he had actually held his breath listening to your words until he chuckled a bit breathlessly. The remaining tension possessing both of your bodies faded away after that, allowing you to relish in the feeling of having the other in your arms again.

After a while, you bravely gazed up at him again, even with your cheeks still set ablaze. ''Come to bed?'' And with a sweet smile, one that reached his eyes and made your heart stutter, he nodded.

Things between the two of you weren't ideal quite yet, Tendou kknew that much. But they would be. Tomorrow would be a new day. You would hopefully agree to celebrate your anniversary a day later. He hoped, that you would agree to spend it with him from the first second you woke up to the very last before you fell asleep. You will hopefully enjoy the news that his promotion was topped with holidays that allowed you to spend Christmas and New Year's Eve with your families in Japan.

He also hoped for you to say yes when, surrounded by your friends, he would ask you to marry him under the Cherry Blossoms in spring.

Things weren't quite ideal, but watching your peaceful expression while sleeping on his chest, he knew, all the up and downs were worth powering through. He would embrace every hardship if that meant keeping you by his side forever.

#Haikyuu #haikyuu!!#haikyuu x reader #is this a headcanon? idk but I'll tag it like that for now until I know better #haikyuu headcanons #Shiratorizawa x reader #Tendou x reader #Haikyuu imagines #haikyuu scenarios

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masonscig · 3 years

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first line tag game

thank you for the tag @crackerdumortain !!!!! yours were so much fun to read omg !!!!

Rules: List the first lines of your last 20 stories (if you have less than 20, just list them all!). See if there are any patterns. Choose your favourite opening line. Then tag some of your favourite authors!

[disclaimer: i write for the choices fandom and some for litg so you’ll see a mix of those fandoms on this list LMAO]

1. stay [twc – mason x sofía]

The first time was casual. She had a knack for musing her thoughts aloud, tossing her harmless opinions out for anyone who’d catch them.

She was good at starting conversations in that way – while he’d never been one for talking.

She never did it with heavy topics, though.

2. thieves in the shadows [choices – blades au – mal x zilyana]

bullets pelted the crates they were crouched behind, wood splintering in every direction. bodies were strewn across the warehouse, the unmistakable pools of blood streaking across the stone.

“raine! to your left!” immy yelled her way, barely sparing her a glance before unloading her clip, shell casings clinking against the ground.

the gun trembled in yana’s hands. she’d shot one before – practice at the gun range, glass bottles in a back alley – but never a live target.

3. if we meet again [choices – open heart au – bryce x spencer] 18+

year one

The ride from the airport to her parents’ home was long and grueling, the slushy ice pelting the windshield barely passing for snow.

It was practically sub-zero outside, a stark difference between the mid seventies weather she’d just left.

4. clandestine [twc – mason x sofía] 18+

“hey. hey wake up –”

she stirred at the greeting, but jumped when he kicked the desk. her face contorted into a grimace, the imprint of her tweed jacket on her cheek outlined in pink. “hmm?”

“you fell asleep again,” he said, plopping a bag in front of her.

5. undying [choices – blades – mal x zilyana]

Zilyana stirred, resituating herself against Mal’s bare chest, feeling his arm instinctively tighten around her shoulders. When she realized she was missing the sound of his deep breathing, accompanied with an occasional soft snore, she cracked an eye open to see his chin tipped upwards, his gaze trained on the ceiling.

6. talent show [choices – platinum – shane x dom]

There wasn’t a day that went by where she didn’t cross his mind. Even since they were kids.

He admired so much about her – her fiery spirit, her drive, her unwavering tenacity.

And he’d been in love with Dom for as long as he could remember.

7. redeemed [choices – platinum – raleigh x dom]

As soon as he stepped off stage, he was shuffled to his tour bus, Fiona on his heels. She looked like the human embodiment of rage in a grey blazer, a look in her eye that made him thankful he wasn’t the one it was directed at – or at least he hoped he wasn’t the reason she was two seconds away from a murderous rampage.

8. hidden [choices – foreign affairs – blaine x carina] 18+

Her cheek slipped out of the palm of her hand, forehead smacking the desk, nearly jumping out of her skin at the abrupt awakening.

“Ow.”

She prodded the tender spot on her face, thankful her foundation was thick.

A soft snore caught her attention – next to her, Blaine was passed out. Leaning back in his chair, his head was thrown back, arms crossed against his chest, the textbook on its face in his lap.

9. is this fate? [litg au – bobby x mc] 18+

The peroxide was cold when it hit her skin, the liquid bubbling on her knee, relentlessly stinging. She sucked in a breath through gritted teeth.

“Sorry… should be over soon,” he murmured, wiping up the stray liquid that streamed down her leg with a small rag.

The heaviness of the atmosphere between them was almost too much to bear – they’d barely spoken since he helped her onto the counter in his small office, leg propped up between his own, where he sat in his desk chair.

10. asvista cove [litg college au – bobby x elena]

Bobby’s thumb flicked the lighter repeatedly until he got a consistent flame, moving slowly from left to right over the edge of the blunt. His cheeks hollowed out as he sucked in, the tip of it an auburn ember. He pulled it out of his mouth and sucked in an even deeper breath, holding it.

When he blew out the thick cloud of smoke, he passed it to her, coughing under his breath. “Whew. Your turn.”

She followed suit, the thick smoke coating the inside of her lungs, bitter and heavy. She exhaled, the shroud smoke enveloping her view of the sealine.

11. reticent [twc – mason x sofía] 18+

She was bare.

Bare in the way that one is when they’ve been stripped down and torn apart with a trained gaze just calculating enough for them to feel seen – parts of her she didn’t know she’d hidden splayed out like withered pages of a book, dog-eared and marked up like a frequently reread novel.

One he’d reread because it was familiar, because it had fallen into his lap (he hadn’t searched for it), not so much because it was his favorite.

12. more [twc – mason x sofía] 18+

He laced his fingers through her thick hair, reveling in the way his skin looked contrasted against the midnight of her hair.

[the way i can’t post more than this bc it’s....... very nsfw right out the bat LMFAO]

13. calm before the storm [choices – open heart – bryce x spencer]

Since the moment his hands trembled amidst one of the most important surgeries of his life, Bryce was holding on by a thread.

With each half-assed joke he cracked, each wavering smile, each time he tried convincing others – including himself – that he was coping, he fell apart more and more.

The first night he went home after Spencer was quarantined, he trudged through the halls of Edenbrook, like he was dragging his legs through wet concrete. He was nearly magnetized to her bedside, not wanting to leave, but he needed to rest – he’d been awake for nearly a day and a half by the time he clocked out.

14. envy | part two of the attached series [twc – mason x sofía x felix]

He strode down the hallway, hands in his pockets to give the illusion that he didn’t give a shit, when he was most definitely on edge. His fingers flicked his lighter open and closed against the twill lining of his pockets, trying to focus on the soft clicking noise it made instead of the swarm of thoughts clouding his conscience.

He still couldn’t figure out why he cared so much.

15. comfort | part one of the attached series [twc – mason x sofía x felix]

He noticed it before she did.

Her pulse didn’t jump the same way it did the first dozen times he walked into the room. The blood didn’t rush to her cheeks, or creep up her neck, the crimson flush absent even when he tried his hardest to fluster her. And it normally took next to nothing to get her to turn into a bumbling mess.

16. out of time [choices – open heart – sienna x danny]

She sprinted down the hallway, pager still beeping erratically on her hip, the weight of the numbers enough to make her feel like she was slugging through wet concrete.

No, no, not him, please, not him, she chanted to herself, vision blurring with tears before she had the chance to let the negative possibilities set in.

17. unrequited part three [choices – open heart – bryce x spencer]

She slumped into the seat in the deserted waiting room, her joints popping as she stretched, her deep sigh echoing off of the tile. She was exhausted.

She could usually push through the worst of her shifts, but fatigue settled into her bones, a lethargy she’d never experienced entrapping her like a net, and she couldn’t fight her way out of it this time.

18. signs [choices – ride or die – logan x raquel]

“A final in sign language? Couldn’t you just have a conversation with the teacher or some shit?” Logan sat across from her on the couch, watching as her fingers bent and flexed, transfixed.

She stopped abruptly, screwing her mouth to the side in concentration. She repeated the same few moves, getting more and more frustrated with each sequence.

19. mementos [choices – ride or die – logan x raquel]

The sound of his boots slapping against the damp pavement reverberated off of the brick of the alleyways, his gasping breaths adding to the symphony that was his escape.

20. warmth [twc – mason x sofía]

“You’re going the wrong way,” Mason grunted, looking particularly stiff in her passenger seat.

“I thought we could take the scenic route,” she shrugged, flicking her high beams on as she turned off of the main road leading downtown, easing on the brakes when the tires hit the gravel.

okay so....... i didn’t really realize just HOW MUCH i’ve written since the summer? i’ve fallen into a pattern where i think i’m a failure bc of how slow i am to write because i have so many series i’ve started and dropped off and wips i’ve abandoned but.... i’ve managed to write for most appreciation weeks i’ve both hosted/participated in and i’ve written for THREE fandoms.... i don’t normally gas myself up but? i’m really? proud of myself? KSJDJKSD if you read this far thank you and you’re prob watching me have a breakdown over how much i’ve managed to write oh my GOD ok i need to lie down KLSDFKASFJD i didn’t even think i could hit 20 but i did???? alright i’m officially gonna treat myself at some point bc i did all this in less than a year.... these are from the end of july 2020 to now..... wow ok im done i promise SKDFJKSDF

tagging: @raleighcarrera and @pixeljazzy !!! <3

#tag games #my fic #long post

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pastelninjaimagines · 4 years

Note

B, F, K, L, X for the founder trio? 💕

Hashirama

B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

He really loves your pretty smile, and the way your eyes light up when you see something you like or when you’re talking about something you’re passionate about. He loves how happy your face gets and that endearing sparkle to your eyes. He’s just so taken by your eyes (no matter the color) bc it’s the most expressive part of you, “the gateway to your soul” as he puts it. He could stare into your eyes for hours and be the happiest man on earth.

He truly admires your enthusiasm and your passion for life. He loves that you’re just a genuinely happy person bc you both just enjoy life’s joys with one another.

F ight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?

He hatesss fighting with you, like it really kills him inside. He tries to do everything in his power to keep you from being angry at him, whether it’s through jokes or kind gestures. He’ll try to make whatever it is right, say extremely smooth things. Basically you can never stay mad at him for long. However when he gets angry, it’s a pretty scary thing and you know to avoid his path. Though he calms down pretty quickly. This man just hates fights with you, he wants tranquility and happiness, and for that, he’s pretty accommodating.

K iss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?

The god of kissing. Like my god his lips make you swoon like nothing else. He takes your breath away, literally. His lips are incredibly soft too, so it’s incredibly enjoyable and comfortable. He can literally kiss you for hours. Pls kiss this man’s ears, it’ll drive him literally insane and ravage you with even more kisses. Super big on kissing the palms of your hands. Honestly, just loves kissing you anywhere and everywhere. Completely unabashed kissing you in public too.

You and him were having a rock skipping competition. And the bet was whoever could skip the rocks farther got to request one thing of the other. Hashirama won (ofc) and he turned to you, an uncharacteristically smug expression on his face, and gestured for you to come closer. He leaned down to whisper in your ear, “As the victor, I have one request.” He placed a finger under your chin and tilted your lips towards his. It only lasted a few moments, but he was grinning from ear to ear when your lips parted.

L ove Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?

Incredibly nonchalant about it. You felt a bit blindsided by his confession only bc he’s flirtatious and kind to everyone, not just you. So you never expected to be the object of Hashirama’s affection. Of course you’d fantasized about the man, bc who wouldn’t? But you never imagined that he felt this way about you. You occasionally accompanied him on walks he likes to take to decompress and emerge himself in nature, when he threw his arm around you and said, “You know, I haven’t been able to get you out of my head for a long time. You mesmerize me, y/n.” This accompanied by the wink he gives you just obliterates you on the spot. You’re just a gushy mess as he asks you to be his.

X OXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?

The king of cuddles. Like you can’t pry this man off you. He’s always touching you in some way whether you’re in public or in private, his hands are always on you. When you’re in public it’s normally his arm around your waste or he’s holding your hand. In private he’s all over you. He loves nuzzling his head to your neck, loves burying his nose in your hair. loves picking you up in a big hug and swinging you around. He lovessss nose kisses, forehead kisses. All kisses are good kisses. Shower him in kisses, he’ll shower you in kisses. It’s a never-ending affection train with Hashi.

Tobirama

B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

Already answered here

F ight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?

He’s incredibly cold when he fights. Will give you the silent treatment. And he’s good at it too. won’t talk at all. Not even pleasantries. If he’s not talking to you he means it. It has to be a serious fight to get to that point too and that means you’re both on complete opposite spectrums of things or one of you majority messes up. Sometimes giving you the silent treatment is Tobi’s way of punishing himself if the fight is bc of him and he knows it.

Your more petty fights, he’ll have a very sharp tongue and be very cold and logical. Not much rage or emotion goes into his arguments with you. And if you get emotional, he’ll walk away telling you to come around when you’ve stopped having a childish tantrum. He’s not dealing with you crying or yelling, he’ll tell you to take it up with someone else. Develop thick skin to deal with arguing with him bc it’s not pretty. He will apologize if he really hurts your feelings undeservedly, but it’s just a simple sorry without much fanfare.

K iss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?

He gets good after a while into the relationship. At first he’s incredibly hesitant with his kisses, but after a while, he learns exactly what works and what doesn’t. He’s a little cold, preferring little pecks here and there. But when he actually deems to make out with you it does drive you wild bc he’s very skilled with that tongue.

Your first kiss was late at night. You were helping him with his research, pouring over scrolls. You moved to show him something when he put his hand on yours. He silenced your words with his lips, just a simple peck, fleeting, but when he pulled his lips away, he had a little smile and said, “You don’t know how long I’d been waiting to do that.” And then he gets back to work like nothing happened while you’re at a loss for words.

L ove Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?

Tobirama never truly confesses per say. He kind of just assumes that you understand his feelings for him in the beginning of your relationship. He treats you completely differently than everyone else and it’s very obvious. He’s softer around you, concerned after your health, your well being. He looks after you, is more lenient with you. And of course, the way he looks at you, the way he smiles often in your presence. It’s incredibly obvious that he has feelings for you. Him confessing is him getting more physically intimate with you. His hugs, when he kisses you. It’s just something that’s understood. You’re the only person he’s doing those things with you. Months after you’re actually in a relationship you’ll be like, “Are we officially together, or…?” He’ll give you a scathing look and say, “You’re kidding, right?” You have to laugh bc you knew that was exactly what he’d say.

X OXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?

Already answered here

Madara

B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

So he’s a sucker for your lips. He loves the little flush of pink they have, and how they’re always parted when you’re absorbed in whatever he’s saying. He loves how plush and soft they are, and how pretty you look when you say his name.

He admires the fact that you actually put up with him and how patient you are. You have the patients of a saint. You take your time with him, listen to his endless rants with a sympathetic ear. You understand him. At times it feels like you’re the only one who can. And he loves you and admires you for it. To Madara he sees things as that it’s you and him versus the world and he loves you for it.

F ight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?

Fighting with Madara is like the unstoppable force meets an immovable object meme. He is stubborn. He will not admit when he’s wrong. And he will outlast you. He refuses to speak with you no matter how long it takes for you to either apologize or admit that you were wrong bc he certainly won’t. And if you try to argue your case he will get nasty. He’ll twist your words, say harsh things, he’s not above fighting dirty. Unfortunately when either of you are mad about something, it’s easier for you to just yes him to death bc he won’t quit until he feels like he’s completely in the right. And Madara’s petty as hell, so watch him get mad over stupid shit that means nothing and have you explain yourself to him bc he misinterpreted an offhand comment of yours that he hella took offense to. He just gets upset sometimes and you can’t figure it out, his ego’s kind of fragile when it comes to you. So you’ve gotta placate him a lot. Arguing is never good, avoid it when possible, bc while he will apologize if he realizes he’s said something that’s taking it really too far, he is brutal and will tear you down to win an argument.

K iss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?

Yessss he’s amazing. He’s a little aggressive. Loves to bite your lip and the dominant one with how you’re kissing. He’s always gotta be in charge and leading your little dance. Also kissing you down your neck is his favorite thing ever, giving little bites here and there just to hear you gasp. It drives him crazzzyyy.

Your first kiss was after a battle. He found you and in the heat of the moment grabbed hold of you without saying a word, still on an adrenaline high, and kissed you hard on the lips. You were too frazzled to process, but he noticed how you kissed him back. He apologized afterwards for being so abrupt, but it came off as such an offhand comment that you knew he fully meant it.

L ove Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?

Oof him confessing is a little awkward. He wants to get you alone so he takes the pressure off himself having a potential audience. So that might take some doing. He’s busy, your busy, he also doesn’t wanna blow his intentions right off the bat. So he’ll make some really shitty excuse to get you alone like “I need some help with something. Come over later tonight.” Super cryptic. Won’t give you any further information no matter how much you pester.

But once he gets you alone, he’ll come right out with it. No fanfare just say, “For a long time I’ve had feelings for you. I hope you feel the same.”

X OXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?

Madara is only affection when he wants to be. He’s very much like a cat. When he wants attention he’ll be all up in your space, but if he doesn’t want it, he’ll be a prickly and tell you to leave him alone. And you better leave him alone or you’ll receive a death glare you wish you hadn’t.

He’ll really only be lovey dovey in private. He’ll want you on his lap to give you little kisses and hold you close when you’re all alone, preferably in your home. One of his favorite things is to rest his chin on top of your head while he’s holding you. He also loves when you play with his hair while cuddling. Like yes please fix his tangled mess of hair bc he sure as hell won’t

#founders trio #hashirama #tobirama #madara uchiha #first hokage #second hokage #naruto #naruto shippuden #naruto imagine #fluff alphabet

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ineffably-effable · 5 years

Text

Come up and see me (make me smile)

Mesopotamia, 3004 BC

Summary: Mesopotamia, 3004 BC.

1690 words

AN: Couldn’t get this scene out of my head, it continues the role-reversal au started in Come up and see me (make me smile)

Thanks again to @mia-ugly for being being an amazing beta reader.

(read on ao3)

Crowley was in a horrible mood. He had spent the better part of the week arguing with his superiors, and all he had to show for it was a splitting headache and a reputation as a bleeding-heart humanitarian.

So, instead of wasting his breath, Crowley had chosen to channel his rage into protecting the eight measly lives he was permitted to save. This was the reason he was standing in the hot sun, in the midst of the crowd that had turned out to watch wild animals being wrangled by three absurdly unqualified men. A few feet from Crowley, he overheard a woman sniping to her husband, “It’s a miracle those idiots haven’t been mauled to death", and was sorely tempted to tell her just how right she was.

It was only a short while later, right when he was contemplating the morality of letting Shem get kicked by a giraffe, that Crowley felt a tap on his shoulder and turned (the wrong way first, sneaky bastard ) to see a familiar salt-and-pepper haired demon grinning cheerfully at his side.

“Crowley! I thought it was you! Those flaming locks of yours are quite distinctive,” he babbled excitedly, charming in a way that softened Crowley’s bad mood considerably.

“Hello, Aziraphale.” he said, trying very hard not to smile.

“I don’t suppose you know what all this is about?” Aziraphale asked. “Did upstairs request some sort of nautical menagerie?”

Crowley smirked.

“I’m sure I have no idea what you mean.”

“Please. I could sense the divine energy holding that thing together from a mile away.”

“I’d hardly be a decent angel if I went around divulging divine plans to my occult foe,” Crowley teased.

“Oh, don’t be so… prejudiced.”

“Prejudiced?”

“It means narrow-minded, discriminatory.” Azirphale informed him, smugly.

“I know what it m-”

“So what’s going on?” Aziraphale interrupted. “Why would you build it so far inland? Are you expecting a flood?”

“A flood?” (Crowley, who was painfully aware of how high his voice had just pitched, determinedly ignored Aziraphale’s raised eyebrow and sidelong glance.) “Of course not- why would you- I mean- that would be an awful lot of rain- and the area is in a drought so- you know what- don’t you dare laugh at me!”

“ My dear, you’re very fetching when you’re flustered.”

(Fetching.)

Crowley had a horrible suspicion his face had turned as red as his hair.

(He thinks you’re f-)

“For the love of- demon, please go pester someone else.”

“Where would be the fun in that?” he replied cheekily, glancing from the boat to the surrounding crowds. His expression sobered.

“I hope you’ll forgive me asking, but that doesn’t seem like a very large boat,” he pursed his lips, “especially not with all those animals.” He turned to look at Crowley. “How many humans are you planning to squeeze in there?”

Crowley could feel his bad mood returning with a vengeance.

“All in all? Eight.” Crowley tried to keep his voice level.

“Eight? ” Aziraphale repeated, in the dry tone of someone who had heard perfectly well the first time, but would prefer a different answer.

“Eight.” Crowley confirmed.

“ She’s going to drown everybody else ?”

“The other continents will be excluded, and most of this one, it’s really just the space enclosed by the two great rivers,” Crowley said flatly, repeating almost verbatim the answer he’d received from Gabriel. Aziraphale had gone pale.

“That’s- hundreds of settlements, thousands of people…” he trailed off as a group of children ran past them, giggling. He stared at Crowley with a horrified expression on his face.

Crowley nodded miserably.

“Oh Crowley.” The unexpected sympathy in the demon’s voice felt like a gut-punch. Aziraphale reached out - perhaps to squeeze Crowley’s shoulder - but retracted his hand guiltily, when the angel flinched away from the offered comfort.

“It’s not like they asked me for my opinion. They didn’t even have the decency to tell me in person.” Crowley grit his teeth. “Gabriel sent a memo .”

“Crowley…”

“Oh, and get this, after it’s done, She’s going to promise not to do it again by refracting light through the leftover water in the atmosphere. Isn’t that nice? ” His tone was scathing now, he felt hot tears pooling in his eyes but he didn’t care. He was about to continue, really lay into some of the idiotic notions Gabriel had used to explain the affair, when he felt a tentative hand resting on his arm.

“I think,” Aziraphale said slowly - as if he were talking Crowley down from a cliff’s edge - “that you’re upset, and you need to choose your words very carefully.”

Crowley waved off the demon’s concern.

“We’re allowed to have doubts, as long as we’re good soldiers and follow orders. It’s only questioning Her outright that leads to trouble.”

“Is that so?” Aziraphale said, face blank. Crowley couldn’t look at him.

Instead they both watched the chaos together, silently observing as one of the unicorns escaped the containment area and made a break for it.

Crowley wondered if the ineffable plan anticipated the extinction of that species, or if it was just dumb luck.

“What if there were another boat?” Aziraphale asked out of nowhere.

Crowley scoffed.

“We’re in the middle of the desert. Who else would be building another boat?”

Aziraphale, who had been staring at Crowley expectantly, stayed silent.

Crowley frowned.

“You can’t.”

“Can’t miracle anything too big, no,” the demon mused. “Won’t be enough space for everyone obviously, but might do for a score of children, maybe even some adults.” He had a distant expression on his face, as though he were doing the arithmetic right then and there.

“Aziraphale. It’s out of the question.”

“Your opinion has been duly noted.”

“What if you get caught ?” Crowley asked, voice strained.

Aziraphale laughed bitterly, “I don’t see your lot down here getting their hands dirty,“ he said snidely. “A storm seems like an exceptionally passive aggresive method of genocide.”

Crowley would have agreed with that point, if he weren’t trying to talk the demon out of getting himself smote or worse.

“What about your lot? You think they’ll look favourably on an act of compassion?!”

“Compassion? I’m a demon, dear boy, thwarting the will of heaven is literally in the job description.” He smiled reassuringly at Crowley. “If they’re truly sinners we’ll get them in the end, and if they’re not, well at least we’ll have a chance at tempting them.” He shrugged. “Hell, I can even bring some teenagers on board, stock the boat with some fermented juice, that’ll guarantee some licentiousness.”

Crowley could feel a headache coming on.

“Why are you telling me this?”

Aziraphale’s brow furrowed in confusion.

“I thought it might make you feel better?” he said, sounding very much like he thought it was obvious. “Surely you can’t want children to die?”

“I- that’s- not the point. God’s plans are ineff- oh, don’t smirk at me - so what am I supposed to do, just look the other way?”

“When the time comes you’ll be on the ark,” the demon said, matter-of-factly, “It gives you plausible deniability - even an angel can’t be everywhere at once.”

“You’ve really thought this through.” It could work, Crowley was shocked to find himself thinking.

“You needn’t sound so surprised.” Aziraphale replied, insulted.

Crowley laughed.

“To be fair, this is a bit of a leap from accidentally abetting original sin. I need a second to adjust.”

“You’re awfully snippy for an angel, dear.”

“Oh, shut up.”

“That reminds me, how did giving away your sword work out for you?“

Crowley bit his lip.

(When he’d been asked outright by the Almighty - Where is the sword I gave you, Crowliel - he’d caved immediately. Shame-faced he’d admitted what he’d done to protect the humans and, in lieu of punishment, he received the ethereal equivalent of having his hair ruffled. He had been sent on his way with the warm feeling of being hugged, and the sound of her gentle laughter warm in his chest.)

“Crowley?”

“Oh… I got the feeling She was amused by it,” he said, embarrassed.

“She must have a soft spot for you,” Aziraphale said, in a tone that was difficult to read. He looked away. “How long is the flood meant to last anyway?”

“Once the storm starts? Forty days and forty nights.”

“Hmm. Heaven does like their nice tidy numbers don’t they.” Crowley wasn’t sure how to respond to that. Aziraphale gave him an apologetic smile. “I should probably get going. Heavenly plans to thwart, no rest for the wicked and so on.”

“Ah, yes,” Crowley responded, dumbly. A little surprised (but definitely not hurt) by the abrupt transition. He wasn’t sure why he wanted to delay the demon’s departure, but when Aziraphale turned to leave, Crowley found himself speaking up.

“Maybe I’ll see you around afterwards then?” he asked.

Aziraphale’s yellow eyes lit up. Suddenly nervous, Crowley back-pedaled, “I’ll have to er- try and salvage all those souls you’ve damned.”

Aziraphale studied his face, giving Crowley a scrutinizing look that slowly morphed into a bemused expression.

“You’re welcome to give it your best shot, angel,” he replied with a grin.

Before Crowley could snark back the demon had vanished.

It was funny, Crowley thought, that the demon had been the one to come up with a way to save people. That he could even be bothered to try.

(“Be funny if we both got it wrong eh? If I did the bad thing and you did the good one?” )

Above him the sky was growing dark with approaching storm clouds. The first drops of rain had started to fall and a sharp, loud, crack of thunder rang out.

Crowley cringed.

On second thought, it wasn’t very funny at all.

#good omens #good omens fic #inefffable husbands #ineffable husbands fic #demon!aziraphale #angel!crowley #role reversal au #my writing

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teddystrap · 5 years

Text

[神なる君と] Spirit duo - Rei

なんかちょっとラストスパートな感じですけど…

Rei is the friendly spirit that Sakuya and co. met when they were investigating rumours about hauntings in the old school building. He’s arguably the most ‘mysterious’ character, since nothing is known about his former life, and I was super curious what his deal is. Not to mention he’s the final obstacle standing between me and Mikoto!! Ψ(￣∀￣)Ψケケケ

Truth be told he’s not really my type, though - since I’m not 15 anymore. I mean he’s a ghost but looks more like a forest elf / Mori Boy circa. 2001, and his voice sounds like it’s breaking. Compared to the other characters also he has a personality (or lack thereof) that is blander than konnyaku. In fact I found myself opening all the Yuzuru options in his common route first before going back and redoing them for Rei, because senpai saranghae I only wanna be wit u <3...

Aaanyway.

-Mizuniwa Rei-

Rei-kun’s common route was actually quite revealing and interesting - in two of his ema, Mikoto actually asked to tag along, so it seemed like there might be some important information there idk.

In his second ema, Mikoto tells Sakuya that she has the power to push people who are on the brink between Life and Death into one world or another, depending on what kind of guidance she gives.

Which in retrospect seemed like heavy foreshadowing for what’s about to come.

Fuu-san’s backstory was also revealed here:

Around 10 years ago, Fuu-san and his bff, a boy named Kawashina Yuuya, were students at Mikagurayama High School. One day they found a hidden basement storage room in the old school building, and turned it into their hang-out spot.

The basement used to be a bomb shelter, and had some books left over on occult spells and curses, that were used during the war to protect the townspeople. Fuu-san found a book with a spell to summon the powers of the Great Demon, and wanted to try it out of fun/boredom, but Yuuya was against it.

So Fuu-san did it by himself anyway. He got the sealed cursed box from the magical cave and took it back to the basement to perform the spell. Halfway through he passed out... and when he came to, he realised that Yuuya saved him by transferring the spell onto himself.

Yuuya never woke up again, despite a lot of medical attention and whatnot. After half a year, Fuu-san decided to quit school and skip town to learn exorcism so that he can save his friend. But when he finally returned a few years later, Yuuya had already died...

Fuu-san lived with guilt all these years and thought that Yuuya died hating him. But when he went down to the basement with Sakuya to liberate his spirit, Yuuya’s spirit communicated through Sakuya that he doesn’t ever regret saving Fuu-san, and he hopes Fuu-san can stop blaming himself and go forward in life, smiling... By this point I was pretty much crying like a baby... ｡･ﾟ･(ﾉД｀)･ﾟ･｡

Oh how I wish there was a Su-sa-no-o in my neighbourhood, with a sexy store-owner like Fuu-san...

But we’re not here to court Fuu-san (I wish we could, mang. I wish we could), so let’s get back to Rei. In his route Sakuya tries to help him to find out about his family and his past. She asks Aki for help ofc, and Aki reports back that she couldn’t find anyone matching Rei’s description in the database of deaths, nor the missing persons list...

And the mystery deepens dun-dun-DUN. This would’ve made for an interesting story development,... except the writers totally abandon it and instead opt for Rei and Sakuya frolicking around in the forest, true to his Mori Boy style (wholesomely tho, since they are both underage XD). Then Rei realises that he’s not long for this world, and he tries to put some distance between them - but Sakuya eventually convinces him that they should spend his last remaining time on earth together and make lots of beautiful (wholesome) memories.

There were a lot of group events in his route, which was nice since I got to see Yuzuru-senpai mucho. (Although he’s not an option here obvsly T_T)

You know I will happily choke on a fish bone for you, senpai <3.

So hoshimatsuri night, Rei undergoes the ceremony to pass into the other world. Sakuya stays home, because she’s not strong enough to go and say goodbye to him. Is this like deja vu from the Yorihito/Nisei story arc or what?? ...After that, Sakuya goes to the old school building one day after school, and finds a note from Rei. SURPRISE - he’s still here.

...

It turns out that Sakuya’s, uhh, clinginess is keeping him from successfully departing. At this rate he’s going to grow weaker and weaker and become trapped in the interstitial space between two worlds - forever. They keep communicating through notes, and through voice chatting over radio, while Sakuya grows enough balls to finally let him go.

Eventually she does. Because let’s face it - Otomate can’t afford to pay their seiyuu to carry on a story for like two gajillion chapters.

In his final moment of departure, he appears to Sakuya in a dream, but they can’t hear each other’s voice. Just as Sakuya is freaking out, he pulls her in and kisses her, then disappears into the ether. (*ฅ́˘ฅ̀*)♡

...I guess Yuzuru and Rei’s routes don’t work the same way as Narumi and Yakumo’s, bc you don’t get the alternative ending by choosing the ‘wrong’ option for the last couple of choices. I wasn’t strong enough for senpai’s bad end, but I was actually pretty curious about Rei’s, although all the same I wasn’t able to unlock it. Either way I hope he didn’t get stuck in between worlds forever, poor kid has been through enough.

1. Good end: Fast forward 10 years, Sakuya becomes a teacher at Mikagurayama High School, just as Rei had hoped. She still goes to the garden every day to take care of Rei’s flowers. The old school building is about to be torn down because it’s too old and might be a safety hazard. She’s on her way there one last time... when she gets a call from Aki, who finally found out what happened with Rei’s past-life investigation 10 years ago. Unfortunately Aki trips on something and the line cuts off before we get to hear it. _(:3」∠)_

So Sakuya is there happily watering her flowers, when guess who appears - ahem *Rei*, now all grown up. He tells her that this time he’s not a spirit anymore... and the scene just ends there. I’ve seen a lot of abrupt endings but this has gotta take the cake. Although I’ll admit adult Rei is kinda sorta smoking hot, so less talk more making out!

[Thoughts] What can I say? This route really didn’t explain as much as I thought it would, although there were some good bits. For one, the Fuu-san backstory really got to me. Fuu-san was always the side character that I was most curious about, since he seems kind of... shady, and like he might’ve had a colourful past. His arc really delivered, and it’s my favourite out of all the four side stories, although I loved them all in their own way.

I was expecting to find out about Rei’s past here, but I guess the writers are saving it for Mikoto’s route / wrap-up, which almost certainly means there’s going to be a surprise revelation. So I am looking forward to that and I hope they don’t fuck it up.

The route itself actually felt like it was mostly stuff that belongs in a fandisk, rather than an individual character route. All the group hangouts, and scenarios that reveal idiosyncrasies about the other characters (e.g. everyone’s drawings in the Fuu-san arc. I finally got to see Yuzuru-senpai’s kawaii creations! :3).

Senpai’s art totally unleashes his inner otome...

As expected, Rei failed to give me any doki-doki feels... except at the end, where we saw grown-up Rei and got to hear Iguchi Yuuichi’s normal voice for like 2 seconds. (I wish this game had a fandisk bc I *definitely* need more of that!!) From the other character routes I got the sense that he’s an iyashi-kei type of guy, and he’s probably the most consistent out of all of them, because he continues being selfless and caring about Sakuya before himself throughout - e.g. helping her to find her future path despite not having one himself.

Still I gotta admit, when he confessed that he liked Sakuya, I did a silent fist-pump in the air, because FINALLY here’s a guy who said it first. I’m so tired of always having to make the first move >;(

Also the thing that Narumi said really touched me here: that Rei would rather choose a lonely existence as a spirit trapped between two worlds for the rest of eternity, than force Sakuya to let him go. Even when he was weakening, he never said anything to Sakuya. In a way he was perhaps the most adult-like one out of all of them. Admittedly I didn’t like Sakuya very much in this route. She seemed very self-absorbed and immature, refusing to face the truth. But eventually Narumi kind of slapped some sense into her (figuratively ofc, I mean Narumi would never actually slap her XD) and she did choose to do the right thing.

...I guess Narumi is determined to be the guy that has a crush on her and ‘saves her’ one way or another in every route. Kudos to him but he’s still only, like, my third or fourth favourite lols.

Lastly, I felt that this route was actually the most poetic + metaphorical one so far. (Maybe the other ones were, too, and I just wasn’t paying attention?) ...The metaphor of flowers bearing seeds that blossom into new flowers, bearing witness to their relationship and carrying on their legacy. When they first met the flowers were newly planted, and when they said goodbye they were just about to wither.

Also Sakuya and Rei always met after class at sunset, the time between day and night - like the space between Life and Death. Idk mang but that’s, like, really beautiful or sumshit.

But this is the most poetic thing of them all~!

#otome #otome game #idea factory #otomate #psp #visual novel #kami naru kimi to #wafuu #supernatural #iguchi yuuichi #sakurai takahiro

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assassins-and-hidden-blades · 6 years

Text

Hold On

Request: ... maybe smth more angsty like the twins fail a mission bc of a fuck up Jacob did and his sister dies bc of it. I'm a sucker for breaking families like this :") or maybe istead of evie it could be a s/o if you prefer to simply do reader inserts

Warnings: Real Bad Angst, Real Bad Violence, Read The Request, It’s just Real BadTM

I’d rather do Reader Inserts plainly for the fact that it’s more immersive; that, and I do not want to make them both seem OOC, which is a tendency when dealing with two protagonists. I’m slightly thinking about a part two, but I’m not too sure. But anyway... Enjoy, friends!

Requested by Anonymous

"Hold on," you whispered with bated breath to Jacob, who was helping you to toss a giant crate of rigged dynamite off of a smuggler's boat in the middle of the Thames.

"I am..." he grunted, his muscles straining and aching under the weight of the objects. You both got to the front of the ship and threw the contraband overboard.

"Oi!" a voice scolded. You and Jacob shared a glance under your hoods.

"Time to leave!" said he, diving over the edge.

"At least we agree on one thing..." you mumbled to yourself, joining him in the nick of time.

The water was murky, and you didn't dare open your eyes until you got to the surface. The water's surface broke moments after you and Jacob inhaled the air as an anteater inhales ants. His cowl had slipped onto his shoulders (as did yours), and his hair stuck to his forehead. "Back to the train?" You suggested. You earned a dubious squint in response.

“What, no ‘race to the train’?”

You laughed at him and paddled back with a bit more speed than necessary to shore.

Blighters trailed threateningly close to your carriage. Gunshots sailed past your head and you gripped tightly to the reigns of the horse. "Hold on!" Jacob cried from the roof, shooting his own bullets and darts and bombs and whatever else you could think of.

"I'm trying!" You responded, knuckles going white.

A Blighter pulled up alongside you, and instinctively you reached for your throwing knives, aiming for the horse's flank. Your aim was in the perfect place. Frantically, the horse galloped off down random alleyways and back streets.

"Get up here!" Jacob instructed. Hurriedly, you scampered up to the roof. He pulled you into him, muscles taut with stress, and shot a zip line to the nearest building. The sudden rush through the air made you cling on for dear life (as you had no control over where he was going) and you ended up safely on a balcony, watching the Blighters follow the carriage across a bridge.

"They didn't see us?" You queried.

"Let's not question it." Jacob pulled you over the rooftops find a way back to the hideout.

BOOM!

The factory exploded, sending fire, ash and embers storming up the wooden frames. You and Jacob were running across the rafters, aiming for a metal platform that had an open window behind it; your way out.

Jacob was quite a bit behind you, but you weren't leaving without the both of you accounted for. "Come on, Jacob!" You pressed, watching the flames belch into a monstrous cloud of smoke.

"Hold on a minute!" He retorted breathlessly, his wooden beam dangerously brittle. As he came closer, there was a crack beneath his feet. He paused, shocked.

"Run!"

He did as you suggested, sprinting over young flames. In a split second, there was an abrupt CRACK and the timber gave way beneath Jacob's feet. "No!" You sprinted forward as he hastily jumped, grasping for a stub protruding out of the platform. His fingers managed to grasp it, but the support was too weak and that too snapped like a twig. Jacob fell with it, a yell falling from his mouth.

"Jacob!" You peered over the edge and sighed thankfully as you saw him hanging from a flagpole sticking out of the wall.

"Little help... please?" He strained, adjusting his grip and swinging viciously over the acrobatic flames.

"Hold on!" He was too far down to reach by leaning over the railing. You observed a railing beside you, before an idea popped into your head.

As quick as a flash, you ripped your red scarf of cloth from around your waist and tied one end securely around the railing, whilst the other was wrapped around your palm.

Testing it for stability, you leaned over the edge and reached out your arm, slowly lowering yourself further and further. Jacob used the remainder of his sapped strength to pull himself up as much as he could to meet your hand. He grunted in effort and his viper like arm struck out to meet yours; it didn't register until you were tugged harshly by the added weight. You could tell his teeth were clenched and his jaw was set.

"Whoa!" You breathed, regaining balance. Pulling yourself back slowly, Jacob reached out with a free hand to grab hold of the platform. You wriggled your fingers out of the cloth once you were safe and went back to help Jacob– this time with two hands.

Once you were on the platform, the two of you had no time to waste before it was to explode, and you fiddled with the knot of the cloth before just slicing it with your blade and sprinting out of there, both of you fully fatigued. Once you made it to a safe distance away on a flat roof, you fell to the ground beneath you.

"Well," you panted. "That was... something else." Jacob joined you on the floor.

"Thanks." He drew deep breathes in and out of his lungs.

"You're not going last next time," you stated.

"I wasn't... I won't..." he was struggling to find words, heaving his chest in and out. You laughed breathlessly.

The final showdown-- the three Musketeers (Assassins) against one bulked up Templar. And boy, he had it all: gear, skills, you name it, he had it.

The night was calm and still, unknowing of the blood that was supposed to be spilt tonight.

A frightening aspect of this mission was the fact that there were barely any Templars around him as you approached.

Feet as light as a feather and as quiet as a mouse, the three of you moved towards him from different routes. You came from the ground whilst Jacob and Evie came from two different directions on the buildings above.

The buildings gave you cover, and more than once came the decision to take cover against the wall. Checking to see if the clearing was empty of Templars, you made a move to cross; to get to the office. The rooftops in Jacob’s area should be clear of snipers by now. As if to prove your hypothosis, you saw a figure clad in black and green give you a thumbs up.

Perfect.

Just as your foot stepped out into a brighter area, a loud gunshot rang out in the air.

You whipped yourself back around the wall and hit the floor, pain blossoming in your gut.

Jacob signalled that he killed them all!

“Well, well, well.” A big brute of a man -- it was your target-- caught your neck, scraping your back against the coarse bricks until your toes couldn’t reach the floor. He squeezed, and it did not take long for you to start gasping. Your hands flew to his arm, weakly trying to pry him off.

“Assassins aren’t as observant as we thought they were, it seems.”

Blood dripped out of your mouth. The effects of blood loss really beginning to sink in.

“Why were you trying to kill me, Assassin?” A sharp pressure pressed against your already bleeding wound, and you let out a strangled whimper.

“I need an answer.”

It was impossible to reply.

“Guess you’re of no use to us, then.” You felt an electric type of shock on the hole in your gut, before a searing pain clutched your torso.

The brute had stabbed you with his knife, before twisting and removing it violently.

“NO!” A sudden reintroduction of gravity sent you back to the ground. Air flooded your lungs, and you coughed up the blood that had gathered in your throat. The brute and another figure were flown sideways and rolled away in opposite directions. A kukri slid slightly further away. As quick as a flash, the figure was up and straddling the brute and sheathing his serrated blade into his chest three times, each one more vicious than the last. He died almost instantly.

A single moment was all it took for the figure to be by your side. “I’m so sorry,” he whispered with urgency, cowl resting on his shoulders. “I’m so so sorry.”

“Y-You gave me the s-signal, a-and...” you cried out weakly in pain, effectively cutting yourself off as you tried to move.

“I know; I’m so sorry.” He ripped off his sash and pressed it firmly against your wound. He shushed you when you yelped, tears flowing down your cheeks. He nestled your head against his shoulder, your upper body cradled in one arm.

“Evie!” His voice cracked as he yelled for backup. “EVIE!” There was urgency and emotion; a tone of life and death and hurry up, Evie.

“Jacob, what’s...” footsteps trailed off as Evie stared in shock, from her brother and best friend to the blood leaking brute. “Oh my God.”

“Get help!”

“Who should I--”

“A doctor, a nurse, Henry, anyone!”

Flustered, Evie couldn’t help but freeze.

“NOW, Evie!”

You whimpered at the sudden head throb the loud noise caused. You were quickly met with whispered apologies as the older twin set off sprinting.

“You n-need to leave before...” you took a few deeper breaths. “... b-before th’ Police...”

You got your point across. You didn’t have to say anymore.

“Don’t worry about that; just keep breathing for me.”

“B-Bullet...”

“I don’t want to hurt you.”

Jacob pressed harder. “It h-hurts...”

“I know it hurts, I know.” His voice was soothing; reassuring to the point where you almost fully believed that you were going to get out of this alive. “If I can survive a burning factory, you can heal from a small scratch.” You gazed at his sad smile, his face framed with tears as he chuckled solemnly.

“I’m scared, Jacob...”

He gripped you tighter. “There’s nothing to be scared about, love. I’ve got you, okay? Just, hold on for me.”

You tried to move your hand to grip his jacket, but your limbs felt numb.

“I can’t f-feel my legs...”

Worriedly, Jacob took in your complexion. Pale skin and sunken eyes. The only time he’s seen this expression is in the dying moments of his targets.

“Evie’s coming, Y/N/N. You’ll be fine, alright? Just stay with me, okay?” He took one of your hands and pressed it against your wound with him. “Keep applying pressure.” He reached his arm over you to reach the ties on your robes; the tight clothing needed to go.

His neck came within inches of your nose, and you caught the scent of his leather coat; pine and pub-- a reminder of happier times.

The quick loss of pressure to your torso made you hitch a breath. The pain seemed blossom further up your stomach. You felt your head lull back.

“Hey.” Jacob snapped his fingers a few times to get your attention again. “Stay awake, love.”

“I d-don’t...” It quickly became harder for you to take in stable amounts of air. As a response, Jacob released some of the pressure to make it easier for you to breathe.

“Hold on, Y/N/N. Please.” “Just take deep breaths with me, alright?”

The bleeding was slowing down, so he deemed it safe to take his hand off the wound in order to place one of yours on his chest. It was silent for a few moments as you regain the little composure you had left.

You didn’t want to die.

“S-Shroud, Jake...” you gently closed your fingers against the fabric of his green lapel.

“What about it?” His hand returned to your wound once you calmed down.

“Starrick has it.” His eyes widened beneath the long strands of his hair. You tried to shift into the warmth of his chest more, but ended up taking pained breaths, almost falling into another hyperventilating state. Instead, he pulled you closer, closing his eyes and resting his forehead on yours, tenderly soothing your cries with gentle shushing. His fingers clasped your hand tightly.

“You be good now, Jacob Frye.” You felt liquid drop onto your cheeks. “I love you.”

“I love you, too, Y/N/N. So much.”

The atmosphere fell into thick silence once more.

A minute more passed when Jacob’s ears heard a commotion in the street. His head shot up and his chest deflated in relief. “D’you hear that? Evie’s brought the whole cavalry with...”

He cast his eyes down to meet yours.

You stared at the sky, watching everything but nothing at the same time. He pushed a few strands away from your eyes, using his bloodied fingers to slowly close them. He placed one last kiss to your forehead, cradling your head in his hand. Not knowing what to say, he brought your knuckles to his lips and pressed a soft but firm kiss.

Then he began to shake.

Sobs racked his body, wild yet quiet.

Evie was too late, and he didn’t do it right.

“Jacob, Y/N!” Evie and a nurse rounded the corner, but halted at the sight before them.

“Oh, dear...” the nurse sighed sympathetically. Jacob sat up slightly straighter, but didn’t look up.

“It was all my fault.”

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demons-n-daydreams · 6 years

Text

Let Tomorrow Come

Pairing(s): Minho/Reader, Reader & Gally, Reader & Newt, Reader & Alby, angst/fluff

Warnings: violence, blood, injury (PLEASE let me know if I missed something)

Requested by: Anon

Request:

(can u do like a thing? like a super angsty maze runner thing where like the reader and minho are super tight and like each other and theyre running partners but also she gets trapped in the maze???? also i want her to be close with the other gladers esp the OG guys like newt/gally but like not too angst bc im still crying over newt k thx going to go cry now)

Word Count: 5.4K

Author’s Note: OKAY LOOK WHO’S WRITING AGAIN??? Requests open here

Your name: submit What is this?

Sweat was dripping down your neck, legs pumping, your breaths even and measured as you ran alongside Minho. Neither of you had spoken for hours; it was a hot day, and you'd been running a lot longer than usual, trying to map out another section of the ever-changing walls.

After about another half-hour of running, you both stopped to take a break, drinking out of your nearly-empty canteens. Leaning back against the wall, you were grateful for the shade and the coolness of the stone against your sweaty, overheated skin. You took only about two minutes, not wanting to linger in the Maze longer than necessary when you had limited time. You took advantage of the small reprieve to look over your partner, taking in the glorious sight of his toned muscles and flushed skin.

"So," Minho said, slightly panting, pulling his leg up to stretch his hamstring. "Head back? We've got," he checked his wristwatch, "twenty-six minutes. Should be enough time."

You nodded, taking a moment to fix your sliding ponytail back into place, looking up at his face with a little joking smile. "Yeah. Don't want your shank-ass endin' up as Griever meat."

Minho smirked, throwing his arm around your shoulders and swaying you around with a teasing glint in his eye. "How could I this beautiful face end up like that with you-" Minho shifted his grip so that both arms were around your waist and he lifted you into the air, spinning you around as you shrieked and laughed, upper body hanging over his broad shoulder, "lookin' out for me? My brave, brave Y/N!"

You giggled like the klunkin' mess you were, willing your face not to redden at the feeling of his arms around you. He set you down, tugging teasingly at the ends of your hair before slinging his arm back over your shoulders, which were exposed in the dirt-smudged white tank top you were wearing. Throwing your arm around his waist and wrestling with him, you exclaimed playfully, "Slim it, shank! Just don't want Newt and Alby up my ass because you were too slow. They kill me, ain't no other girl to keep you klunkheads in line!"

Minho laughed and released you from his grip, leaving behind a hot, lingering sensation where his skin touched yours. "Don't be like that… You know you love me!"

If you only knew. You couldn't stop the blush from staining your cheeks, and you desperately hoped that it was covered by the flush already present from the heat. Poking his stomach, you were about to respond with a pithy retort when you heard a mechanical whirr, no farther than twenty feet away.

Playful mood abruptly gone, you made swift eye contact with a tense Minho, both of you still and quiet as death. It was really close to the time the doors closed; the Grievers must have come out, and your laughs and shouting must have attracted one. Minho swiftly but quietly pulled an arm around your waist and tugged you against the wall, facing his back outwards to shield you. He buried your bodies into the nearby ivy in hopes of staying out of sight until the Griever went away.

Rather than go straight, down the the path perpendicular to the corridor you both standing in, the Griever turned, going down the same passage but in the opposite direction. You let out a hitched breath, the adrenaline coursing through your body making you nearly dizzy. Minho's firm chest, pressed right up against your front, was nearly shaking with the tension and fear. You stood there for minutes, time slipping away until finally, the Griever was out of sight. You both let out relieved breaths, and Minho leaned down to whisper in your ear quietly, "We have nineteen minutes. We have enough time to get back. Stay close."

You nodded, and you both disengaged your bodies, separating from the wall. You began to run back down the path, trying to move as swiftly and silently as possibly. Hopefully, you wouldn't run into a Griever again.

As if you were that lucky.

You only had ten minutes left to get back when you heard the sounds of a Griever close by again. You and Minho didn't bother to stop, just went from a fast run to an absolute sprint. An ear-splitting shriek came from behind you, and you were being chased, the thundering footsteps of the Griever coming far too close. You kept running, not focusing on the beast behind you, only on the quickest route back to the Glade.

Left. Right. Right. Left. Left. Right.

"Here!" Minho shouted, grabbing your arm, turning left instead of the right you should have been taking. You didn't protest; this route might have been longer, and you didn't have a whole lot of time, but there were narrow paths and plenty of tight turns this way, which would (hopefully) help shake off the Griever. No matter what it could do to the two of you, there was no way you were going to lead it back to the Glade where all the rest of the boys were.

Your heart was pounding, sweat dripping into your eyes, and you were moving your legs faster than you ever thought possible. Despite how fast you were going, though, it felt as if the filthy, cracked ground beneath you was forcing you backward, with how fast the Griever was advancing on the two of you.

Minho's grunts and your desperate gasps as you pushed your bodies to the limit were drowned out by the roars of the Griever chasing you. You had been running for what felt like hours, barely dodging the stinger and claw-like legs that took terrifyingly close swings at you. The Griever was insanely close, but you didn't bother looking back. There was a narrow corridor up ahead, just small enough to fit you and Minho and would block the Griever out, and you were almost there-

"Y/N!" Minho's voice, full of desperation and gut-wrenching fear, pulled you to an abrupt stop. Your breath caught in your throat when you saw the Griever's limb take a swing at his lower legs, the sharp edge cutting deep in his left calf.

"Minho!" you cried, catching him as he stumbled, and you dragged him away from the Griever. Terror filled your bones as you heaved his body towards the restricted path only two feet away, not stopping no matter how exhausted you were, barely dodging the Griever's swiping legs.

You finally pulled him through and the two of you collapsed on the ground, just barely out of the Griever's reach. Scrambling to stand back up, you took a second the take stock of the situation. You'd have to help support Minho- he'd probably be able to support his weight on his leg, but he most likely wouldn't make it to the doors in time unless you helped him run. Your hands shook and your voice trembled, but you were firm in placing Minho's arm across your shoulder as you said, "Come on. We have four minutes left. We have to make it."

Ordinarily, in this route, four minutes would be just enough, but you were already trembling from the exhaustion of the desperate chase despite the adrenaline your system, and Minho was heavy. His much larger body would be hard to haul to now nearly impossible distance to the doors. Never the less, you just set your shoulders determinedly, moving as quickly as you could.

Minho assisted by pushing off with his right leg so you wouldn't have to carry all of his body weight, but after about two tense minutes, he muttered, "It'll be faster if you just-"

"No!" you shouted, not bothering to pause your frantic gait. Your shoulders and back ached almost as badly as your legs from supporting even only part of Minho's heavy weight, but you didn't slow down at all. "I ain't leavin' you here."

Minho just fell silent, not wanting to waste energy arguing with you. He knew you were stubborn as hell, and fighting would just decrease your already slim chances.

It was getting dark really fast when you finally took the last turn, and the doors were finally in sight. The whole Glade had gathered there, and their eyes widened when they caught sight of the two of you, and they began to yell, begging you to go faster.

A resounding crack! went off, and the doors began closing while you were still twenty feet away.

You moved even faster, not knowing how it was possible, but there wasn't enough time. Minho's breath was hot and frantic in your ear, and you were still so far-

Your legs were burning, and tears were beginning to sting your eyes. You weren't going to make it. Only a small opening was available when you were still five feet away, and without thinking, you clumsily threw Minho through it with all the strength left in your worn out body, a wild cry leaving your lips as you collapsed to your hands and knees, making eye contact with him for a split second before the doors slammed shut.

You sat there, panting, aching limbs supporting your heaving body. A small bit of relief went through you that you had gotten Minho out, but that got washed away by the wave of dread that crashed over your body. You were trapped.

No one has ever survived a night in the Maze.

There was dead silence as Minho lay there, collapsed in the grass, leg bleeding sluggishly. He looked uncomprehendingly at the walls that sat before him, still breathing hard. When realization finally dawned on him, he threw his exhausted, pained body against the wall, yelling.

"No!" Minho frantically slammed his fists against the unrelenting stone, the burning pain in his leg barely felt. "Y/N!"

Everyone was suddenly moving very fast, and the world was spinning, and Minho's head abruptly cradled someone's legs. He looked up at Newt's worried face, dizzy and distraught.

"She- she-" he gasped.

"Shh," Newt said, swallowing hard. "We need to get you the Med-jacks. Clint!"

Just as suddenly as he'd fallen, Minho was being hauled up, Clint and Jeff on either side of him, carrying him to the Med-jack room. The crowd around the doors hastily parted for them as they hurried past, Minho dazed and uncomprehending, his legs dragging behind him.

Minho laid there in uncharacteristic silence as they fussed over his leg, someone wiping his dirty face clean and giving him water and food. Everything went down his throat like a lump of cement, and a heaviness pervaded through his entire body, but he didn't let the weight drag him into sleep.

The terrified look on Y/N's face the second before the walls had closed replayed in his mind. He couldn't shake the wide-eyed fear he had seen in her eyes. He just sat there, staring at his now-bandaged leg until a shake against his shoulder startled him out of his trance.

"You good there, shank?" Newt sat at the edge of Minho's bed, brow furrowed in worry. "Bloody gave us a scare, there."

Minho ignored Newt's attempts to distract him. "She's still in there." His voice was hoarse with emotion.

Newt's eyes tightened. He was quiet for a few moments, at a loss for words. Y/N had come up to the Glade just two months after Newt himself had, and in the past couple years, she, Minho and Newt had gotten extremely close. He knew how Minho felt about Y/N. They were more than just running partners; while neither had gotten around to admitting feelings or establishing any sort of relationship, it was commonly known around the Glade that they weren't simply just friends. But Newt knew Y/N just as well as he knew Minho, and he knew that if anyone was stubborn and resilient enough to survive the Maze, it was her. He held onto that hope fiercely, denying any other option.

"She'll make it out," Newt said with quiet conviction. "If anyone can do it, it's her. Now sleep. You'll need some peace and quiet, after..."

Minho nodded, grateful for the reassurance, before finally letting his exhaustion take over him and close his eyes.

His dreams that night weren't peaceful, or quiet.

Eight hours. You only had to be here for eight hours.

You crept slowly along the Maze, trying to be stealthy. You had no idea how close the Griever from earlier was, or how close any other Grievers could be. Any sound made could mean death.

The fear made your heart race and your muscles tense, but you tried to keep your labored breathing as steady as possible, knowing that at any moment you could have to run again.

You had been wandering, quiet and scared, for four hours, according to your wristwatch. You were in a bad way; your legs were tired, and your upper body and back ached from carrying Minho's significantly larger weight. You were out of water and had no food, and your body was trembling from exertion and cold, the afternoon heat giving way to the frigid night air.

Before you could decide whether constant movement or hiding was your best chance of survival, the familiar, dreaded sound of mechanical legs hitting the ground reached you. Your breath caught in your throat and you nearly sobbed in exhaustion, but you broke out into a clumsy run, knowing that stopping for a split second would get you killed.

Adrenaline coursed through your body, and you didn't slow for a moment. The Griever was getting closer, and as you made a sharp turn left, it lashed out, leaving a shallow but long cut along the side of your abdomen, blood immediately starting to soak into your shirt. You stumbled, and before you could regain your footing, the Griever slammed a leg into your injured side, leaving you sprawled on the ground, breathless from the stunning pain.

Fumbling for the knife on your back, you let out a scream as you slashed at the Griever's exposed belly as it stood over you. It reared back, but then lunged for your legs, and your screams echoed against the stone walls around you as you felt white-hot agony race through your lower right leg and the Griever's limb slammed down on it.

Refusing to go down without a fight, you kept slashing and slashing at the Griever's underbelly, sobbing and screaming all the way until, miraculously, it stumbled back and collapsed, twitching violently before lying still.

You laid there on your back, sobbing, clutching your broken leg, ribs burning like hell. You frantically tried to compose yourself; every extra sound, every second there, vulnerable on the ground, led you closer to your death. You had to get out of the open; you couldn't even walk now, much less run. Hiding was the only way to survive.

When you calmed your breaths as much as you could, you took stock of your body; your left side had a long, shallow but bleeding cut, and was bruising heavily from the hit you took. The skin on the front of your right thigh, exposed by your shorts, was torn and also bleeding, but not heavily enough to kill you in the next few hours. The lower part of your right leg, however, was clearly broken in the middle of the bone, and you nearly gagged at the sight of it. The pain from your leg overshadowed every laceration and bruise that littered your body. You were covered in Griever blood, which was more of a black, mucus-like substance. You were absolutely shucked, but you had no choice but to move on; it was either that, or wait in plain sight to die.

About twenty feet away was a wall covered in overgrown ivy; while you definitely couldn't climb, you could try to conceal yourself underneath the big tangle of vines that crawling along the ground.

You took a deep breath and flipped yourself onto your stomach, hurt leg dragging behind you. Taking your right arm, you dragged yourself across the ground, letting out a stifled wail at the pain before biting your lip, body trembling and sweat soaked. Chest heaving, you slowly but surely crawled to the tangle of vines, sobbing softly the whole way.

The Glade was tense, and nobody slept; after silence for a few hours, everyone was on edge.

People had gotten trapped in the Maze at night before; while not a significant part of the population, it was still enough that for the last few they had lost, the boys were resigned to it and would at least fall into a restless sleep, preparing for the inevitable funeral at the Deadheads in the morning.

But this was different. Y/N was the only girl that had ever been in the Glade, the protectiveness that was extended to her, especially by the older Gladers, went above and beyond any other Greenie that had ever come up the Box. Not a single person could sleep; they had all resigned themselves to waiting until morning, hoping and praying she would make it back.

And then they heard the screaming.

It was high-pitched and pain-filled, and everyone, including Minho who'd woken up from a nightmare, was gritting their teeth at the blood-curdling sound. The monstrous roars of a Griever accompanied them, and everyone held their breaths when abruptly, both the roars and screams stopped.

No one said a word; Minho's eyes filled with tears as he sat on the bed in the Med-jack room, and Clint and Jeff said nothing, just exchanging grim glances. Back where everyone else was sleeping in the Homestead, an air of shock and horror muted every boy in the room. Newt and Alby were both tense and upset; Gally, usually so aggressive and outspoken, could do nothing but stare at the ground.

No one dared break the silence.

You finally reached your hiding spot, taking even longer than you thought. By the time you were burying yourself underneath them, completely concealing you from sight, your wristwatch indicated that you had a little over three hours left. The ground below you was dirty and cold, and you shivered. In nothing but the tank top, shorts and running boots that you had been so grateful for during the afternoon's unbearable heat, your body was now recoiling from the cold. Sleep would have been an escape, but you didn't dare; you needed to be alert, just in case, and your heart was pounding too hard in fear to sleep anyways.

So you laid there, in the cold, the pain all over your body a dull roar compared to the merciless throbbing of your broken leg. You laid there for an undetermined amount of time, not wanting it to drag on by constantly checking your watch. The only thing you could see was the darkness beneath the vines, and the dead Griever twenty feet away.

When you finally checked the time, unable to resist, you only had an hour left. You were trembling now, your body cold and exhausted, but your mind still keyed up. The involuntary movement hurt and jostled your leg, but there was nothing you could do about it. You stayed hypervigilant, hoping and praying to the Creators that nothing else would happen. With forty-five minutes left, however, you heard another Griever nearby.

You shut your eyes, tears beginning to stream down your face. Please. No. I'm so close.

You stayed quiet and still, tears cascading down your cheeks noiselessly as the Griever began to walk past slowly. You stifled a whimper as it walked right past you, inches away. Your body was so tense the tremors that had rocked you for hours stopped, and finally, when you heard the mechanical whirrs fade away into the distance, you exhaled, letting out a deep sob.

After taking a long time to finally calm yourself down, you checked your watch. Ten minutes until the doors opened. You were in no condition to even drag yourself out of the tangle of vines, but the Grievers would be gone after the doors opened, and hopefully, the other Gladers would find you. You stuck your uninjured leg out, boot just barely peeking out of the ivy.

You finally let yourself believe you were really going to live, and sighed, relief forcing your body to finally relax from its painfully stiff hold.

You were going to survive.

Alby sighed, frustrated with his injured Keeper of the Runners. "Minho-"

"No, Alby!" Minho interrupted the leader. Usually, despite his hardheadedness, Minho would never disrespect his superior like that, especially in front of all the Keepers during a meeting, but there was no way he was being left behind while they searched for Y/N. He was going to be there. No matter what. "I can walk on it, at least. Jeff and Clint gave me a brace, and they both said that as long as I don't sprint, I should be fine! There's no shucking way I'm staying behind while she's still out there!"

Newt sighed, seeing that this argument was doing nothing but wasting time. The doors were opening in five minutes. Exchanging a resigned look with Alby, he said, "Fine. But you aren't going alone."

Minho relaxed slightly and nodded gruffly at his best friend, grateful. Gally stood up, the rest of the Keepers looked up at him. "I'll go."

Minho didn't bother arguing; it made sense. Fighting against it would just delay finding Y/N. Newt couldn't run, especially since he had aggravated his limp pacing, and Alby was needed, more so now that his second-in-command was out of commission. Gally was physically the strongest Keeper, and Minho's leg wouldn't allow him to carry her out fast enough, if she was injured, or-

Well, if she was injured.

Minho nodded and headed towards the North entrance, Gally trailing behind him.

When the doors opened they immediately began running through the Maze, neither of them speaking. It was nothing like the easy silence of the routine runs with Y/N. It was fraught with tension, and a fear of what they would find. Minho ignored the pain in his leg, hellbent on finding you as quickly as possible.

They ran for almost an hour before Gally said, "Shucking hell-"

Minho whipped his head around the where Gally was staring, and gaped. There was a Griever there, lying on its side, underbelly torn open and a black pool of blood surrounding it. Minho's breath caught in his throat when he saw a trail of both black and red blood smeared along the ground, leading to a tangle of vines, as if someone had crawled away, alive-

Hope immediately rose up inside him, and he fervently prayed please be okay, please be okay.

Gally and Minho both scrambled to the ivy gathered at the wall, and Minho could have sobbed when he saw a small boot, attached to a bruised and cut up leg, sticking out. He couldn't bend down well to drag her away from the vines, but once he stood over where she was, he heard a weak, "Minho-"

Minho collapsed to his knees in relief, heedless of his injury, and Gally knelt down next to him, helping him grab the hands that reached out from the vines. When she was pulled into view, Minho nearly sobbed at the sight of her, heavily injured, skin cold as ice and covered in dirt, and god knew what else, but alive.

Gally and Minho, regardless of their lack of getting along, immediately pulled her into their arms, hugging her between them tightly.

"Ga-gally- Minho-" her voice was hoarse and cracked, and tears were streaming down her face, but damn, it was the most beautiful sound in the world.

The three of them knelt there, hugging and trembling for a few moments, before both boys pulled back to look at her. The side of her face was bruised and a little swollen, and the left side of her shirt was caked in blood. The skin of her right thigh was torn up, and the lower portion of the same leg was bent at an awkward angle, but despite the amount of pain she must have been in, Y/N was beaming, the widest smile Minho had ever seen.

Gally smiled back at her fondly, relief relaxing his usually severe expression, and said, "Alright, shanks, back to the Glade. We need to get you to the Med-jacks."

He helped Minho get onto his feet, a little unsteady, and then pulled Y/N into his arms bridal style. She sucked in a sharp breath at her injuries being jostled but immediately curled into the warmth of Gally's body. They walked back since Minho's leg was hurting, and Gally was being cautious not to hurt Y/N more, all three of them nearly giddy with relief.

Newt's leg already hurt like hell from pacing all night, but that didn't stop him from standing at the Maze entrance like everyone else, fidgeting. Normally, Alby would have forced everyone to go back to work, but even he was standing there, waiting anxiously for Gally and Minho to return with you.

They'd been gone for over an hour, and Newt's anxiety levels were through the roof, when finally, they came into view.

Minho was favoring his hurt leg, Gally walking right beside him, and in his arms-

"Y/N!" Newt's heart dropped at the sight of her limp body, but then she lifted her head weakly, and suddenly, the Glade erupted into yelling and cheers and relieved laughter.

"Y/N! Y/N!" All of the Gladers felt the deep knot of tension that had fallen over the whole population loosen at the sight of that little sign of life. When they walked out of the Maze, everyone gave them some space, but they were all cheering and craning their necks to look at their miraculously alive friend.

"Alright, alright!" Alby yelled over all the noise. He tried to be businesslike, but Newt could see the overwhelming relief in the slump of his shoulders. "You've all slacked enough today. She's back. Get to work, shanks!"

The crowd dispersed, their almost bubbly good mood a big contrast to the grim silence of only minutes ago. Ultimately, the only ones who stayed were Newt, Jeff, Clint, Alby, and Chuck, who patted the ankled of Y/N's unhurt (relatively) leg and then left to go back to work.

"Okay, klunkheads," Jeff said, "Med-jack room. Now!"

Gally carried Y/N, and Clint went to swing Minho's arm over his shoulder. Before Newt could protest, Alby did the same to him, and they were all led by Jeff to get help.

Despite the pain in his leg, Newt had never felt so good, even as he was laid down by Alby onto the uncomfortable Med-jack bed. Once he'd helped Newt get situated, Alby walked over to Y/N, who was getting fussed over by Clint.

"Glad you're okay, girl," Alby said softly, laying a hand on hers. She smiled up at him tiredly, squeezing his hand before he let go, walking out to sort out all the work he'd abandoned that morning. Gally just gave her a nod and a small, rare, genuine smile before leaving the room, letting the door shut behind him.

Jeff, once he'd given him some of the muscle ache cream for his leg, instructed Newt to rest. Newt reassured himself that his friend was okay by looking at her exhausted face one more time, and fell asleep smiling to the sight of Minho staring at her from the next bed over like she was the sun in the sky.

Sweating, you whimpered when Clint took a hold of the foot of your broken leg. Minho moved to sit in the chair next to the bed you were laying on, and he grasped your hand. You squeezed it gratefully, tears running down your face as Clint shifted your leg bone back into place. Finally, he finished, and he brought out the (thankfully) rarely-used leg brace sent up by the Creators.

You were exhausted, every muscle in your body aching terribly. Your thigh and side burned, especially after Clint had to clean out the wounds, but the pain was worth for the familiar sight of Minho's face, just a foot and a half away. You'd never thought you'd see it again.

Once Clint had finished patching you up, even cleaning your exposed skin as much as he could with a wet rag, he stepped away.

"You'll live," he said, slight teasing smile on his face. You grinned up at him tiredly.

"Thanks, shuckhead." Your voice was scratchy and hoarse, but better after the water he'd given you. You looked at him a little closer, noticing the dark circle under his eyes. You frowned. "Go sleep. I'll be fine."

Clint shook his head. "Ain't I supposed to be the Med-jack, shank?"

You didn't take his shit. "Then you should know that sleep is good. Go," you cut off the beginning of his protest. "Unless I need constant lookin' over, sleep, you stubborn shank."

Clint shook his head again, exasperated but fond. "Okay," he relented. "But you best be yellin' up if you'll be needin' anything, alright?"

You nodded. "Go!"

Clint laughed but ultimately left you alone with Minho and Newt. Newt was in the bed on the other side of Minho's, sleeping peacefully.

Minho, however, was getting up from his seat next to you, letting go of your hand. A small jolt of alarm ran through your sluggish body. "What's wrong? Where are you-"

Minho cut you off by dropping himself onto the side of your bed, seated right next to your uninjured side. You stayed quiet, content to look at him in silence for a little while.

His gaze was roaming up and down your body, cataloging every hurt part of you. You were doing the same to him, looking over his bulging biceps and strong legs, wincing a little at the bandage on his calf.

Minho shifted on the bed, careful not to jostle you, so you were lying down side-by-side. You were a lot smaller than him, so even though the beds were for one, there was enough room for the both of you. Without hesitation, he retook your small hand into his.

You laced your fingers together, looking down at your intertwined hands before looking at his face, only inches away.

"Scared the shuck outta me, Y/N," he said softly. "Never do that klunk to me again, okay?"

You nodded, giving him a weak, sleepy smile. "I'll try not to," you said, injecting a bit of a joking tone. It was quiet for a moment.

"If-" he cut himself off, looking frustrated. "If anything happened to you-"

You tightened your grip on his hand. "No, Minho. I'm here now. That's what matters."

He nodded stiffly, looking into your eyes, still looking a little lost. You looked straight back at him, before your vision dipped a little to his lips.

Looking back into his eyes, you noted the darker tone they had taken, and how they looked down to your lips as well. You carefully adjusted your bad leg so that you could lean over to him, and after a little pause, your lips connected.

The position was a little awkward, and you felt like a steaming pile of klunk, but nothing had ever felt better than how the hand not holding yours slid to steady your hip as he held you against him, both of you laying on your sides to face each other. Your free hand slid to the back of his neck, caressing the short hairs at his nape.

The kiss was kept chaste, but when you pulled back, you had never seen such a heated look in anyone's eyes before. Minho looked seemingly straight into your soul before leaning his forehead against yours, both your eyes slipping shut.

"I love you, slinthead, you know that?" he whispered, like a little secret. Your lips nearly split open from how wide your smile was.

"Love you too, shuckface." You opened your eyes and gave him one last peck, before laying back all the way and snuggling as much as you could into his side.

With your hand still cradled in his, the heat of your body warming him, you both fell asleep, safe.

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