Alrighty fellas time for another one
(DPxDC) Batman Rogues ranked based on how good at parenting Danny (and co.) they would be
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Would probably actually be able to step up and be (relatively) good parents: The Penguin, Mr. Freeze.
They would have EXTREMELY different dynamics with Danny, but I think they could figure it out.
The Penguin would definitely only take in Danny to improve his reputation, and probably so that he could monopolize the use of a new meta’s abilities. (And perhaps to study him)
However, I think that attitude would last for at the absolute most a month, probably closer to two weeks, before he genuinely bonded with him. He’s like the dad who says he doesn’t want a pet, and then in a week they’re inseparable.
He’s not a good person, but I think he could probably end up being an awesome fucking dad. Also, there’s no way in hell anyone would mess with Danny. Not even close. If he found out Danny was getting bullied he’d ruin the bully’s fucking life.
He wouldn’t directly throw hands with a child, sure, but that’s only because it would look bad. He would, however, completely destroy their family’s careers and force them to leave Gotham out of shame.
Mr. Freeze is only a rogue because of his wife. Like, that’s it. He only wants (or wanted, depending on the version) for his wife to be cured and to live happily with her again. All of this is for her, either to help her or to avenge her.
That’s to say that yeah, if Danny managed to weasel his way into his heart, he would have a place with him forever.
He’d probably only interact with him at first because of the ice powers, but if Danny did manage to get closer to him (that’s a pretty big if) I think he’d do fucking anything for him, just like his wife.
He would raze the GiW to the ground for his boy.
They’d do alright probably. Nothing special, but it’d work out ok: Scarecrow, Ivy & Harley, Two-Face, Killer Croc.
Scarecrow is, funnily enough, not that bad. Like, is he genuinely deranged? Yes. Is he murderous and cruel? Yes. Does he have a moral compass that would absolutely support taking care of a child? Yes.
He’s been shown multiple times to genuinely care for people, even if it’s in his own way. Like, yeah, maybe fear-gas-themed murder and torture is a bit far sometimes, but it’s what he knows how to do.
Like, would he know how to take care of a kid? Hell no. But he does have a pretty good list of what not to do, courtesy of his own childhood, so he’d have a pretty alright start.
Ivy and Harley aren’t rated higher because I just don’t think they’d really be responsible enough for a child. I don’t doubt that they’d be able to love Danny, nor that they love each other, but they’re not very stable, and they don’t have a very good grasp on normalcy.
Like, they’d be incredibly cool aunts, or family friends, or something. I just don’t think that they’d do well being the sole guardians of a child or teenager.
I can’t stress this enough, I think they would genuinely love having Danny with all their hearts. I just don’t think that love alone is enough.
Avoiding that genuinely depressing thought, I think Two-Face would similarly be an awesome uncle to have, but wouldn’t do well at the actual “parenting” thing.
Like, he could keep a kid alive no problem, and he’d probably be awesome to have as a legal guardian and stuff, but there’s no way in hell he’d be able to keep Danny in line, for the sole reason of not really seeing a reason to.
However, if he got put in Arkham, he’d 100% not be above guilt-tripping Bruce into taking Danny in, so he does have backup options.
Killer Croc would be an awesome friend to Danny, but that man is in no way capable of being a parent.
He’s got a pretty short temper, and Danny is a little shit. There’d definitely be fighting. A lot of fighting. Croc still gets some points though because he’s a decent guy and I don’t doubt that he’d be willing to get help from the other rogues or even Batman should he need it.
Shouldn’t be trusted to keep a gerbil alive, yet are somehow still better at this than Maddie and Jack: The Riddler, Solomon Grundy
The Riddler is a childish, egotistical asshole with a bit of a god complex and a truckload of emotional baggage.
That being said, he’d still do better than Danny’s actual parents.
Partly because the bar is so low.
Like yeah, there’d be a lot of arguing, but I don’t think that he’d actually ever fight fight with Danny, mostly because he’d feel like he was turning into his father.
For the most part he’d be at the same level as Scarecrow or Killer Croc, I just put him lower because I think he’d forget to feed Danny sometimes. Still not as bad as the food coming alive to attack him though.
Solomon Grundy is pretty similar to Killer Croc in terms of how I think he and Danny would get along, I just think he’d be much worse at getting the things Danny needs to live and be happy.
He’d be cool as a weird uncle, or a friend, but he’d be pretty awful at being an actual parent.
The house is on fire, god is dead: Mad Hatter, Ra’s Al Ghul
Mad Hatter would have UNIMAGINABLE levels of beef with Danny. He would unironically throw hands with a child.
That being said, I think he’d genuinely like Danny.
Wouldn’t make up for anything, but I do think he’d at least not hate him.
Ra’s would be funny as hell no matter what.
He’d ALSO have unimaginable beef with Danny, but for entirely different reasons. He would spend all his time trying to convince Danny to become a member of the LOA and also to turn him fully immortal. Danny would buy him a “world’s okayest dad” mug and “I’m not the dad who stepped up” shirt. They would try to beat each other to death over Damian.
Danny would still probably choose him over Vlad in a heartbeat.
Getting dissected would have unironically been a better option: Joker
Your homework today is to watch Batman Beyond: Return of the Joker.
Because I know you won’t, I’m just gonna tell you that Joker has done some MK Ultra shit to a child before in order to mold it into a mini version of himself, and he’d absolutely do it again.
One of them would absolutely end up dead, and considering their track records, I’m not so sure it would be Joker.
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You know what I find frustrating with Shen Jiu fans sometimes ? Just because he had reasons and maybe didn't do other things he was accused of, it feels like that either justify his behavior towards Binghe and/meant it wasn't that bad when he was so abusive ?
Shen Yuan discovers that he had reasons and a tragic backstory and never once does he try to justify his abuse, he is very much "cool backstory still hurting a child who did nothing wrong" and he has so much of this that he makes the choice for Binghe and assumes he wouldn't forgive him either for that and the abyss (when it's not his choice to make).
I wouldn’t mind people discussing the complexity of Shen Jiu if it did not come paired with the need to absolve him of his shitty personality. Shen Jiu is a serial abuser who did 100% of the things he was accused of with only some of those things having a secret intent that others didn’t know about. He does go to brothels but people just didn’t know why, he is antagonistic and physically violent towards Liu Qingge because of an imagined slight, and he has abused multiple children outside of Luo Binghe out of jealousy, so much so that many left the sect before Luo Binghe became the newest target. People trying to excuse his worst behavior because a few of his lesser actions had not-bad motivations is nonsensical, since the reason why people won’t side with him to begin with is because of his toxic personality.
A great example of just how much Shen Jiu made his own bed is the Water Prison arc. Shen Jiu gets thrown into the water prison with no defenders (yqy defends him but not his actions) because with how maliciously he treated people, no one doubted that he would act maliciously in any situation. Shen Yuan, in the same situation accused of the same crimes, gets defended almost to the point of violence breaking out, making it so that he had to willingly relinquish himself to avoid a fight, because with how kindly he acted towards everyone, no one could believe that he’d either 1) kill an entire household or 2) do so without a good reason. Neither man chooses to justify their actions or deny the accusations in the face of the scrutiny, but one is immediately condemned while the other is given the benefit of the doubt. What a massive difference.
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everyone (not everyone. maybe like 5 people but anyways) on about whether rose or scorpius would be the professors’ favourite and i think most people lean towards scorpius being the fav. whilst i agree he gets better grades then rose i argue rose is more liked. my reasons:
scorpius doesn’t know volume control. bro just roars with laughter over the smallest comment albus makes and for what… he’s keeling over the side of his desk red-faced and for what..
bro TALKS out loud when writing his notes, evidently annoying everyone (except albus who is used to it) in his vicinity
scorpius tries to sneak in cheeky little snacks here and there except he’s not inconspicuous at all. he just tries to stuff his face when the professor is turned and then his cheeks will be full of cake and his mouth smeared with cream or some shit
his leg is always bouncing up and down
has burst into tears at least once in every class for various reasons (missed his dad, missed his mum, missed albus, was hungry, was tired, is overwhelmed by the concepts etc etc)
sometimes forgets to put his hand up in class and just blurts the answers
against all school guidelines, will show up to class sick, with all his medicine, a shit tonne of tissues and three blankets and will make his own little fort of disease at the back of the classroom (to this day he has a perfect attendance minus the fourth year shenanigans)
was once twenty minutes late to class and got so stressed about his attendance that he told his professor in explicit detail the bowel issues he was having and the extent of how bad his constipation was that morning using horrific metaphors to explain the physical feeling, and because he doesn’t know volume control especially when he’s emotional, most of his class heard it too, which embarrassed neville (because of course he was the professor in this scenario) to no end he ended up just giving scorpius a free pass to the medical wing
became impervious to shame halfway through fifth year. literally stopped gaf. which means many of these issues would be repeated as long as it didn’t effect his grades
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