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#''what if ''found family'' parental figures have the toxicity of a traditional family's parents. something like that''
bruhstation · 6 months
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who here loves divorce? I do. here's captain star and captain zero: two people who can't help but drag other unwilling people into their huge mess! including the youth. can't forget the youth
(bit of ramble in the tags)
#this is tugs#tugs captain star#tugs captain zero#tugs ten cents#tugs zip#zerostar#zipcents#<-- let us hold hands through the trials of this world.#fortezza bigg city#senjart#complicated doomed old men yaoi is a bruhstation staple so of course I'm thrilled to show these two#said this to my friend#''what if ''found family'' parental figures have the toxicity of a traditional family's parents. something like that''#I can't really call the star fleet or even z-stacks found family because they're all bound together out of their will#like a traditional family#also they're people just doing their jobs but the youngest ones definitely got the worst blunt force#related to the animal imagery#ten cents is unwilling to be ordered around 24/7 by captain star and wants to assert his own agency#but due to his status as an employee and a child in star's eyes he can't do much about it other than scoff when star asks where he's been#ten cents is more assertive and stubborn. he desires to fly free and do whatever he wants without getting constantly nagged#zip is more mellow and subdued. he is more obedient and doesn't question much of what he's told#whether it's by zorran zug or captain zero#zip is like if you take a silly jolly golden retriever and try so so hard to train it to become a hunting dog#he regards captain zero highly like a son would to a father. he believes that zero is acting upon tough love on him#when in reality captain zero is just being his impatient distant self. he does care about zip but he also wants profit from it?#''I could guide him at arm's length but I should also have another errand boy in my ranks. it's good that he's obedient''#also FYI captain star and zero are not horrible people or whatever outlandish thing there is. they're just deeply flawed people-#-with distorted perspective on relationships and morality#anyways. I need a cold beer
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vodika-vibes · 3 months
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Enemies to Loves?? Character doesn't matter I just need my Enemies to lovers fill for my fourth wing hangover
Thin Line
Summary: After the rise of the Empire, you, an unwilling Soldier of the GAR, is reassigned to being Crosshair's handler. You hate him, and you think he hates you. Turns out there's a very thin line between hate and love.
Pairing: TBB Crosshair x F!Reader
Word Count: 2272
Warnings: Reader has a toxic family
Tagging: @trixie2023 @n0vqni
A/N: So I was going to do one of the many event requests that I got, but I got it with inspiration for this, and I love Crosshair, so...ta-dah~
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You never wanted to join the military.
You were always a bit too…soft for military life. A bit too quick to tears, a bit too sensitive, not quite forceful enough in your everyday life.
You wanted to be an author, or a teacher, or maybe both. The last thing you wanted was to join the military.
But your parents pushed. And pushed. And pushed.
And you’ve never been very good at telling them no. It’s just easier to do what they want. And they wanted you to continue the family tradition of military service.
So you did. You gave up your dreams, as small as they were, to make your family happy. That’s what family is supposed to do, right?
To be fair, you thought that you were going to get kicked out within six months. You’re really, really not made for this lifestyle. And you probably should have been, but your father was an Admiral and your mother was a Doctor at the most prestigious military hospital in the galaxy, and your older siblings were incredibly high ranked in their respective branches…and you just weren’t.
And then the GAR was dissolved and remade into the Imperial Army, and you thought, now. Now for sure they’ll have to discharge me. 
But still, still they kept you. And, much to your blanket distress, it turns out that you're more competent than most of the people you work with. 
Which is exactly how you ended up in your current situation.
The first couple of months after the Imperial Army took the place of the GAR were hectic, but as things settled, you found yourself getting reassigned. You are now, officially, Crosshair’s handler.
It’s quite possibly the worst thing that’s ever happened to you.
You sigh and pinch the bridge of your nose, “Are you incapable of following orders?” You ask the much taller man standing across from you, his arms are folded across his chest and he has a smug smirk on his face.
“Not so good at following orders, sweetheart.”
“Then maybe I should trade you in for someone who is,” You counter.
“You won’t. No one is as good as I am.” Crosshair is the best sniper in the Imperial army, and he knows it, damn him.
“You’re an arrogant asshole,” You say pointedly, and his smirk widens, “Fine. You did, somehow, manage to complete your mission. So, well done, I guess. But you’re stinking up my office, so get out.”
He just leans against the doorframe, “My hot water rations.”
You exhale slowly through your nose, “Crosshair, have I ever limited the amount of hot water you can use in the showers?”
“I’m just waiting for you to actually turn into as much of an asshole as you like to pretend to be, sweetheart.”
“Get.”
And then he’s gone, allowing the door to slam shut behind him. How, exactly, he managed to slam a sliding door is beyond you, but you don’t care enough to try and figure it out.
You’re pretty sure you hate him. From the top of his silver head to the tips of his toes.
He’s arrogant and pig-headed, and somehow managed to turn something that was a traditional sweet pet name into an insult. And he seems to take joy out of making your life more miserable, which is something of an achievement in and of itself. 
But, even so, you would never replace him with someone else.
Because he actually is as good as he thinks he is. And he does complete every mission that you assign him, and there’s never an excessive loss of life, which you appreciate. 
You push your fingers through your hair, and flicker your gaze across the piles of paperwork covering your desk, and then you sigh. 
You really should have told your parents to kriff off all those years ago, and just gone to school to be a teacher.
Still, if wishes were fishes-
You sigh deeply, and pull your hair out of the strict bun to pull it into a looser tail at the base of your head, and then reach for the tallest pile of paperwork that needs to be finished. 
And then your holo chirps that there’s an incoming call.
You glance at your datapad, and check the number that’s calling in, and then you groan when you see the very familiar number flashing at the top of the screen.
Your Dadmiral is calling.
You sigh one more time, and then press the button on your datapad to answer the call.
“Hi dad,” You say, flickering your gaze to the holo for a split moment, before focusing back on your paperwork.
“Hey kiddo,” Your father is an older man, with hair that’s long since gone gray and a beer belly that he’d have to work at to get rid of. You also know, though you can’t see it through the holo, that his nose is reddened by years of alcohol abuse. “Your hair isn’t in regulation, kid.”
“Ah, so you’re calling as my admiral rather than my dad. Good to know.” You reply tiredly, “What do you need, sir?”
He gazes at you severely, and then sighs, “I need to talk to you about the Dantooine mission.”
You lift your gaze, “Dantooine? That was four months ago.”
“Yes, I know.”
You sigh and open your desk to grab the file he’s talking about, “I know I filled out my paperwork properly-”
“Yes, you’ve always been very diligent about that. But that’s not what I want to talk to you about.” He shifts so that he’s standing at attention, “It has come to my attention that your sniper only killed the men on the list.”
“...yes?”
“Why did he not kill the other members of the cell?”
“...because they weren’t on the list of people to kill.” You reply flatly, “He followed the orders he was given to the letter.”
Your father sighs, “I recognize that. But I hoped that you realized that what the orders meant was that he was supposed to kill all of them.”
“How was I supposed to know that?”
“Hm…I’ll make sure that your orders are more clear from now on.” Your father says, “Now…how are you?”
“Tired. And busy. So if there’s nothing else-?”
“Ah, yes. Right. Well then, I’ll talk to you later.” The call disconnects and you sigh again. If Crosshair knew just how much shit you had to deal with to keep him safe and alive…
Well, he’d likely never believe you. 
No matter. You’ll keep doing what you’re doing because it’s the right thing to do. Not because you like him or anything.
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Life continues for you as it always has.
You move from planet to planet, chasing these terrorists. You give Crosshair a list of people he needs to kill, and then you fill out paperwork and move on.
He’s still a dick to you, and you tolerate everything as best as you can.
Still, every now and then, something different happens. 
Today, for example, you have a date. 
A slightly older soldier asked you out to dinner, and honestly, you need to get out and do something before you rip your hair out, or have a nervous breakdown.
So here you are, dressed in a casual dress and some nice-ish heels with your hair loose for the first time in ages, when the door to your office slides open, “Hey, so-” Crosshair stops mid sentence as he steps into your office, and then he smirks and whistles, “Well now, I didn’t know you were actually a woman under that uniform.”
“You’re a pig, and also, don’t you knock?”
“Guilty, and no.” His gaze drags down your body, an almost lecherous grin on his face, “Where are you going looking so dressed up?”
“If you must know,” You reply with a pointed glare, “I have a date.”
“You?”
You glower at him, “Believe it or not, there are people out there who want to spend time with me.”
“With you, or with your family,” Crosshair asks, smirking as you bristle under his comment, “Sheathe your claws, kitten, I happen to think you look nice.”
“You insult me and then compliment me in the same sentence. Stars, you’re so annoying.” You grumble, “What do you need Crosshair?”
He, openly, drags his gaze down your body again, “Nothing. Just wanted to annoy you, and it worked.”
You exhale sharply, “Wow, I think I actually hate you.”
“Yeah, but you’re far too nice to actually get rid of me unlike some of the other Imps.” Crosshair grins at you, and then spins and he’s gone. 
You take a deep breath to try and settle yourself, and when that doesn’t work you take another one. It’s fine. Crosshair just likes getting under your skin, he has no way of knowing that he just picked at your biggest insecurity. 
And even if he did, it's not like he would care.
You take another deep breath, and then you leave your office too. Hopefully this date will go well, you could do with someone to talk to who isn’t Crosshair.
Two hours later, you’re back in your office, your face pressed into your arms as you try to recover from the hurt that your date gave you. 
Crosshair was right.
He wasn’t interested in you, he was interested in your family, and thought that the easiest way to climb the ranks was by getting close to you. And this isn’t the first time this happened. 
In fact, this has happened every single time you’ve tried to go on a date.
The door to your office slides open, and you lift your head slightly. You recognize the armor immediately, “Go away.” You say, your voice muffled by your arms.
“Nah.” Your desk shifts and you lift your head to scowl at Crosshair, “Bad date?”
“You were right. He wanted to use me to rub elbows with my family, congrats. Get out.” You say quietly.
Crosshair doesn’t say anything for a long moment, and then, much to your surprise, you feel his hand on the top of your head, “Did he hurt you?”
“Just emotionally.” You reply.
“...want me to shoot him?”
A muffled laugh falls from your lips, “You can’t shoot someone because they hurt my feelings, Crosshair.”
He scoffs, “Sure I can.”
You lift your head and his hand falls from your hair to your cheek. His touch is hesitant, but he doesn’t pull away. But neither do you, “Honestly, why do you even care?”
“I’m the only one who’s allowed to upset you.” Crosshair replies immediately. 
“You are incredibly frustrating.”
“Yeah, my brothers told me that all of the time too.” He says with a shrug.
“Brothers?”
“Batchmates.” Crosshair clarifies, “They’re not with the Empire. They defected.”
You huff, “Lucky them.” Crosshair’s eyebrows shoot up, and you cough, “Uh…I mean-”
He watches you evenly, “Do you want to defect, kitten?”
“...I never wanted to join the military in the first place,” You admit, “I wanted to be a teacher. But because of who my parents are, no one bothered to even try to kick me out. And then the GAR turned into the Imperial Army and I’m actually competent-”
He watches you evenly, and you lean your head into his hand. At some point his thumb started rubbing soothing circles on your cheek, and you don’t know when, but you do know that it’s soothing.
“Do you have any idea how awful this job is?” You blurt, “They keep pressuring me to decommission you, and I won’t do it because as annoying as you are, you actually are as good as you think you are-” You ramble, “And I’ve never been okay with how the clones were treated and-and and…” You wave your hands helplessly, “Damn it, you’re mine! And they don’t get to tell me to throw you away like yesterday’s trash-”
Your words are cut off when his lips crash against yours.
Crosshair’s lips are warm and slightly chapped, but you’re not thinking about that because his hand is in your hair and his tongue is sliding against your lips.
And when he breaks the kiss, you just blink at him, speechless.
“I’m yours, huh?”
Your face burns, “I…well…yes.” You finally say, “You’re mine to protect and…and it’s probably not what you want-”
“Stop telling me what I do or don’t want,” Crosshair interrupts, his lips pressing against the corner of your mouth, “I’m glad your date went poorly.” He says, “I don’t want other men looking at you, let alone touching you.”
“I don’t belong to you, Crosshair.”
“Wrong. If I’m yours,” His lips trail up your jaw, “Then you’re mine. That’s how it works. And no take backs allowed.”
“God, I hate you.”
“No you don’t, kitten. If you hated me you wouldn’t be letting me do this.” His lips drop to your neck and he bites down, roughly enough you release a yelp.
“You’re actually the worst.” 
Crosshair grins at you, “Come with me.”
“...what?”
“We’re leaving. We’ll find some backwater planet where no one’s heard of clones or the Empire, and you can become a teacher and no one will ever make choices for either of us ever again.” Crosshair murmurs against your throat, “And I get to kiss you as much as we both want.”
You’re quiet for a moment, and then you sigh, “Yeah. Okay.”
Grandmother used to tell you that there was a fine line between love and hate, and when you were a child, you didn’t believe her.
But, as Crosshair drags you to his ship, you’re beginning to understand her.
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alyjojo · 2 months
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March 🌞 2024 Monthly - Cancer
Preshuffle: You’re getting a new perspective on some sort of betrayal that’s occurred, either towards you or someone else and you’re just watching this, could also be something you’ve done. Sharp, painful endings, and fast beginnings. Impulsive behavior. A lack of emotional connection, or just being disconnected from emotions entirely. Trauma response, fight or flight - choosing flight.
Meditation: We were back in the long long hallway and you said “shit, this again?” Because this time it was dark, we couldn’t hardly see anything. You still had your skateboard though! And I said “but you’ll have to fight off whatever comes first, you’re faster” and you’re like “well, I have a hammer 🔨 “ Idk why you had a hammer, building something at the utility closet maybe idk, and you kinda scoffed at me for not having anything, but we would find something to pick up along the way. I found a huge sledgehammer almost taller than I am, I couldn’t hardly carry or swing it, and you scoffed again, took it effortlessly, and gave me your hammer. We never actually got anywhere (or saw anything) before it ended.
Main energy: The Hierophant rev
Could be a spouse, an ex, a parent, teacher or official of any kind, maybe even a boss for someone. A person that is expected to be a good example for others to follow - isn’t. Things that are traditional, rule abiding, moral, conservative or even lessons already learned are being resisted. Because something or someone has hurt you, now where that fits on the spectrum of heartbreak could go from minor to major. Someone hurt you that morally should’ve protected you. A parent or priest would probably be the best examples, especially with Merit Making as an Oracle, showing a monk. You reject religion? Because of all of the toxic bs humans do with it. The wars, pain, monstrous things that happen, why would that exist? That’s fair, you’re not the only one. Idk why either 💯 If you’ve lost someone, you could be pissed off at God, understandably. Idk anyone that hasn’t shaken their fist at the sky like “what the actual fuck?” at least once.
What’s going on in March:
The Devil:
As soon as I saw this, I heard “The Devil returns” and 8 Cups rev shows returning to a situation or person you’ve left behind before. Someone or something that’s really hurt you. There could be an obsession, addiction, or sexual thing tied into this, The Lovers clarifies…could be several people. Or you’re not interested in committing to a relationship because you’ve been badly burned before, some of you reject the idea of marriage (you’re not alone) or the traditional ideas of anything. The Drama Oracle makes it seem like this is gonna be a big deal. You could also be hurt by someone like this, I saw a parent in the past at the bottom initially. A cheating parent fucked up your family? Could be. Or spouse, partner, maybe you. Someone prefers quantity over quality, and the drama is the biting off of the head of whoever has done this, by whoever had figured it out. Sneaky shit. This could be someone who has done this to you before, or was otherwise involved in an addictive cycle, enabling of addictions on some level. You could be ending it or already have, but they’re used to you feeding their monster 👹
8 Cups rev:
Judgment, exactly what I said, someone is coming back around for another go at whatever it is you’re feeding them. A piece of your mind it looks like, but before it was probably what they wanted right? Or they wouldn’t be coming back. Sex, substances, some sort of twisted dynamic you give to in this person. I don’t know if it was ever even conscious on your end, you just cared about them. If a relationship has ended, you heard enough and told them to kick rocks, they’re crawling back to you 🎶 how that came out. They could come back more responsible, good job, more money, or acting like they’ve “become a man” now all gruffly. Doesn’t have to be a man that’s just how I heard it. They’ve changed, so they say.
5 Cups:
You’re sad! They’re being all friendly and buddy buddy with you, got a good job, made some new friends, look at my wares, I’m hot shit now. You’re just like “hey remember that one time you stabbed me in the fkn BACK cuz I do!” Knight of Swords cuts straight through all of the sugary sweet coating on this persons messages and behaviors. Or it’s all switched. Someone is still upset at an ending, a betrayal, hurt that’s been caused. Angry even. Enough to lash out even, but you don’t want to come off as an asshole (some of you might not even care). That’s where this Drama lies. One person left and is all fine & fancy about it, the other person didn’t want it to end at all, and is not fine nor dandy. Could just be a friend. A friend ditched you for a lover? Or a lover hanging out with their friends all the time, both possibilities are here. There could be an apology but it feels lighthearted, it’s no big deal, it’s said to say it and move along. You could feel used and that’s the deeper issue, a partner comes around for sex and then you’re not the priority anymore.
Ace of Wands:
Repeated from the clarifiers of The Hierophant rev, now this one is clarified by 9 Swords. A sexual obsession, fkboy/girl antics, someone being promiscuous, or just shallow. I assume you are deeply worried about the motives of someone, or their actions. Someone is definitely wondering if their person is sleeping around, it keeps them up at night. Or just using them, having a whole roster of bitches on their phone or w/e, I don’t know if you’re saying this out loud. Knight of Swords is at the bottom again, with sneaky shit, but you could be avoiding saying anything which just makes this more intense for you. Are they playing in your face, and sneaking behind your back? Maybe they’ve done that before and there’s residual trauma there, it’s not easy to trust again once it’s broken. Other than lovers - lying, stealing, getting what they want and bailing, you’re worried about that behavior from anyone.
Death:
Clarified by King of Cups, could be dealing with a Scorpio or that’s you. Someone is coming back around sure, but I don’t think you really want to get involved again. You could even love them, or it’s someone that means a lot to you. The Hanged Man with 5 Swords at the bottom shows you don’t want to be mean or seen as that, but you are hesitant. You pull back, you may avoid, you maybe don’t text back right away, things like that, never fully investing yourself into this connection because you don’t trust them flat out. Or it’s switched. Death, Merit Making, and The Hierophant rev is literally coming out to me like “I’m not your mama.” Like you’re not going to teach this person morals, decent behavior, how to be a good person fk that. Not your job. But you can love them anyway. Some, from a distance, and that’s necessary. Some of you just do, especially those of you where this is a parent, and if not sex, you could fear their wrath 😡 So you avoid them altogether if you can. Some of you simply just hold back your emotions and feelings, your fears, and that needs to stop. They can’t know, you don’t tell them. Others of you may be obsessed back, even though they’ve hurt you before, which makes it even harder to stay away when they come back for whatever reason this time. Or you’re the one going back to something obsessive, addictive, sexual, etc.
Signs you may be dealing with:
Heavy Scorpio, Gemini, Pisces & Libra
Oracle: ✨
28 Anger 😡
A very strong and primal emotion, anger sometimes catches us by surprise. At other times it seethes just under the surface, simmering a long while until it boils over, scalding anyone who is close. Anger is based in fear. Fear of loss of control, fear of not being loved, fear of being judged, fear of not being enough. When anger enters your life - be it yours or someone else’s - go beneath the surface and try to address the real fear that has triggered it. Anger doesn’t go away without addressing the underlying fear. Alternately, beware of someone’s anger directed towards you.
Death ☠️
Endless - Harm - Inevitable
Merit Making 🙏
Goodness - Humanness - Morality
Drama 🎭 - Leo Mercury
We enter into March as:
The Carrot Colored Cloak 🥕:
“Don’t quit before the miracle!”
You are being told that changing your direction at this time is not wise. We never know where our miracles lie in the path, often just beyond the boundary of our faith. You may not see it, but it lies ahead. When we do the work that is chosen for us, we are serving a higher order, and if we stop we upset the balance of our lives. Stick with it and have blind faith, an exciting change is coming. You must press on in the direction of your vision, what you’re working for will come to fruition.
What is to be learned in March:
Crimson Dreams 🥀:
“I am feeling the loss of my dreams.”
Crimson Dreams indicates holding back in some way. Are you selling yourself short? More than likely, it’s a warning you might be giving up on yourself. Are you in a danger zone of complacency? Are you allowing yourself to coast along in a situation you might not really want? Unless we are willing to risk, we may never realize our dreams. This is a need for new awareness. Don’t give up on your dreams! This is a wake up call to face your situation and live the life you truly desire, because you can.
Red may be a lucky color ❤️
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flowerwrites06 · 3 years
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break my mind’s eye V — jjk
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Plot: Jungkook thinks marriage is the only way to seal a deal.
Pairing(s): Druglord!Jungkook x Fashion Designer!OC (Name: Belle)
Rating: G | PG | M | R 18+
Type: Drabble | Oneshot | Two Parter | Series
Parts: Part I | Part II | Part III | Part IV | Part V | Part VI | Part VII | Part VIII | Part IX | Part X | Special 
Word Count: 9k+
Genre: Mafia | Angst/Smut/Fluff
Tags & Warnings (for entire series): drug dealing, marriage through trickery, explicit smut, drug use, dubious consent, prostitution, miscarriage, lots of manipulation, impregnation through manipulation 
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The new routine of embedding her older brother into their lives again became somewhat casual in a fortnight. Though the presence of their ‘guest’ now created a significant rift between the new couple especially when it came to certain less than elegant activities. Not that they did not try of course.
One week into the modified living condition, Jungkook and Belle had been chatting at the bar which now mysteriously had an abnormally good stock of fruit juice compared to actual alcohol. A few instances where the drug lord would pull out a glass of cloudy apple juice creating some suspicious looks from his clients. Apparently Master Jeon was now going on a cleanse from alcohol for a while to prolong his rule over the empire.
The innocent conversation turned to absentminded touches, fingers intertwining and standing dangerously close together so Jungkook could smell her coconut shampoo. One peck turned to a deeper kiss and completely by mistake, Belle jumped on the counter with her now slightly favourite crime lord between her legs, his rough hand sneaking underneath her skirt and his lips nibbling on her neck.
Of course this was the perfect time for Taehyung to decide for a walk finding a criminal fooling around with his little sister while she giggled.
Belle practically flew off the counter almost twisting Jungkooks’ hand and simply put, the two decided to keep it more on the down low next time.
Another week passed and the cartel had been going through some brewing tension with the authorities after a new mayor was elected. Which meant Jungkook barely showed up in the bedroom to sleep and when he did come to the bedroom, it was to work more at the study table.
Belle on the other hand now sat in the designing level of Madame Saito with her large glasses, a red sweater dress to match the confusing mixture of cool and warm. Long hair tied up in a loose bun that lobbed to the side a little when she lowered her head to focus on the little details of the blue hydrangea pattern across white silk.
She approved Seokjins’ offer of becoming his designer for the Sangria House so they could conjoin the Spring Line with the angels’ attire. As much as it ignited a tiny hint of suspicion on the owners’ intentions, Saito advised that it was a powerful business decision. Being a designer of one of the biggest establishments in the city could boost her reputation as a sole businesswoman. Instead of just being Jeon Jungkooks’ fiancée or Saitos’ protégé.
Most of the Spring Line designs were already displayed on mannequins behind her, few of them approved for the runway while others still needed more detailing.
Her thumb already pricked a few times but she grew a good resistance for it at this point carefully creating gradients on the embroidered flowers. Belle quickly learned the importance of clothes in the Sangria House. Even though it was kind of ironic considering the type of establishment.
Angels wearing white fabric were meant to be the ones still in ‘training’, red meant available for entertainment both casual or carnal, lavender represented angels who were trained in more daring acts for entertainment especially ones that were erotic. Then there were the gold angels; extremely qualified in all kinds of entertainment but were already ‘taken’. They were married to someone but still had to entertain customers for a living income. If a customer wanted to spend more intimate time with this angel, it would take the price of a mansion which only one or two clients have ever really paid.
After hearing all this, Belle felt a little silly just calling it a brothel considering how much detail went into orchestrating the whole system down to their clothes.
“Belle!”
Her hand immediately stilled staring up at the figure in a vibrant yellow pantsuit walking towards the working table.
Saitos’ eyes flickered down to the sewing pattern, a smile creeping on her red lips. “I thought you said you weren’t good at embroidery.”
The younger female chuckled nervously poking the needle into the fabric. “Not as good as how you do it.”
“I was forced to sew since I was seven.” She laughed. “Don’t let my younger self being oppressed by toxic femininity stop you from believing you can’t do it now.” She joked, patting her shoulder lightly with her gaze focused on the pattern. “All you need to do is just cut out little loose threads.” Finger gently pointed towards the little threads poking out of the design. “Always make sure it’s smooth. Sometimes when a few parts are imperfect, you can add little extra pieces over top that match the shade of the embroidery design.”
Belle nodded, eyes following wherever Saitos’ finger moved.
Then the senior designer stopped herself. “Oh! Mrs. Jeon is waiting downstairs, she has some news about your engagement.” She straightened up, fixing her blazer before gesturing over to the stairs.
Her words took a moment to sink into her mind before she pulled the hair band out of her bun and tried to make it look presentable again. Glasses placed carefully on the table while the work in progress now supervised by Saito.
Almost rushing down the stairs, Belle came face to face with the woman who wore a body hugging lavender midi skirt and a matching blazer. A smile quickly stretched across her red lips as Boyoung held onto her hands excitedly.
“I’m sorry to disturb you during work but I got too excited.” She giggled, holding up her left hand to admire the ring wrapped around it as if she had never seen it before. “It’s about the wedding.”
Heart raced against her ribcages but Belle tried to keep her expressions calm. “What—what about the wedding?”
“The date, of course!” Boyoung laughed, swinging their arms again. “See we have been saving for Jungkooks’ wedding since his nineteenth birthday. Twenty one is the traditional age to marry in our family.”
Explained the constant suitors Jungkook had to tolerate. Something Belle could relate to. Her parents had been talking about her marriage since she was thirteen because it was a good way for them to gain money. Or to get rid of her. Either way she found herself having one big thing in common with the man. “That’s very nice of you.” Nice was not the proper word Belle wanted to use but Boyoung had proved to the nicest person she met in this new world. She was not going to ruin that safety.
She nodded in acknowledgement. “Since we have more than enough money saved up for the event. I wanted to tell you that we could have the wedding in a month.”
Blood chilled in her whole body struggling to keep her smile up to such a point where it was just her lips curled up while her eyes widened a little. “A month?” She chuckled nervously.
“I know it seems a little quick…” Boyoung admitted while lowering her head for a split second.
Quick was one way to describe a thousand crates dropping right on top of you while you were just working on a pretty dress.
“But it’s good to keep up with tradition.” She nodded mostly to herself, quickly giving her a bright smile like she forced it out of her after a mental pep talk. “And you two already love for each other so it shouldn’t be too hard to fathom.”
Love.
That fucking word again. Everything just came crashing back to her as the ring felt like it was suffocating her finger until it fell off. This wasn’t real, this wasn’t real… those three words swirled around in her mind as she watched the joyful smile adorn Jungkooks’ aunt. It was a game…a deal to protect her family and her own life.
Strange how the two were thinking about the same thing but one had a grey cloud and the other had sunshine.
“Of course.” Belle smiled again a little weakly but the older females’ excitement seemed to mask any suspicion. Admittedly, sparks of interest did fly between the fresh new pair but truthfully it never moved deeper than a sexual attraction. They stopped being rude to each other and grew quite successful in pretending to be a happy engaged couple. Behind closed doors, there were smiles, maybe a little flutter in her belly whenever she saw him but—love?
No.
Love was sacrificing her entire chance at a proper relationship with a happy marriage and children so she could protect Taehyung. What Belle and Jungkook had was not love itself but a consequence of loving someone far too much to lose them.
With that thought, her pounding heart hardened. This was all for the best. The deal is simple. Marry Jungkook and be the perfect wife while Taehyung is given all the resources to recover back to a better version of himself again. What was the point of worrying so much about marriage anyway? Her career showed so much potential, Belle probably would have ended up a single business woman like Saito.
To put it more accurately, this deal was perfect. No one pressured her about marriage, Taehyung was healing and her career moved smoothly.
“So we’ll do it at my mansion then, yes?”
Boyoungs’ voice breaking into the barrier of her thoughts pulled Belle back into reality and she instinctively gave the older another grin. “Yes…your mansion is beautiful, Mrs. Jeon.” She nodded. “It’s the—perfect place for a wedding.” Perfection seemed to be all she could gain at this point.
“You’ve made a desperate aunt very happy.” She joked, patting her cheek. “Now I’ve kept you away from work long enough, we’ll talk soon.”
Belle led the woman across the boutique to the exit where her car awaited, allowing the cool air to ease some of her slightly heated anxiety.
She stood politely in front of the vehicle watching Boyoung climb inside before the driver closed it gently. Though her attention flickered over to something moving on the other side of the street where the park was. Usually filled with children running around, people jogging but her focus directed more towards the bushes fencing the area.
For a quick moment a more sensible side assumed it may have been an animal of some sort merely rustling between the branches.
Though the side that was fully aware of the new gaze on her after the engagement knew better. Animals did not wear black coats neither did they hold cameras pointing right in her direction while trying to look inconspicuous in nature.
At some point Belle suspected the photographer saw her looking into the camera because she saw the figure rush to keep themselves hidden again.
Sighing, the girl gave one quick smile to Boyoung before the car drove away and she tried to fix her attention on her work again.
-
Coffee stained papers flipped and dropped either on the other side of the crowded table or on the floor. Phone rung at some corner constantly while not a single employee had a minute without running around somewhere leaving Namjoon s’ head spinning. On his right were a pile of cases he should be doing according to the captain who insisted that vandals and petty theft was more his specialty. Granted the man could not blame her considering his biggest undercover case went downhill with no leads whatsoever leaving him to be the runt of his precinct for the past year.
He kept a decent aura of respect however, no one really wanted to piss off someone who had been personally trained to cut off important parts in a body.
Taking a sip of his possible fifth cup of coffee, his pile of useless cases forgotten on the side while he stared at the recent pictures sent to him. A few years had already passed with this growing ambition towards finding out how to expose the mystery that was the Jeon Cartel. Apparently each associate took some kind of tight fucking oath which prevented anyone from uttering a single secret about them.
The infamous Jeon Jungkook was a master of words. The golden elite of their city. Contributed to around half of the buildings in the city and factories overseas. Donated near millions of dollars to medical and disaster care.
Namjoon had to admit he was good at what he did. That is until the first drug scandal. One of the factories that Jungkook owned was caught manufacturing cocaine and distributing it to Osaka and Hong Kong. Though quickly swept under the rug when the man had two hospitals built under the guise that it was Jungkooks’ personal apology to the city. His undercover mission which he worked on for months destroyed in two days.
Now the man was left with looking at any recent changes. Anything that so much as leaned the slightest towards suspicion caused his ears to prick up and his eyes peeled.
“You know Pornhub exists, right?” Yoongi spoke in his usual gruff tone, sipping on his espresso while watching over Namjoon s’ shoulder at the pictures he was looking at.
The younger male rolled his eyes continuing to observe the photos taken three days ago. A woman wearing a striking red dress conversing and smiling with the second most powerful lady in the city. “It’s Kim Belle.” Namjoon remembered the name on the newspaper article in front of him. “Seems Jeon Jungkook is getting engaged.” He sighed, brows furrowing slightly.
“Okay…” He nodded walking over to his desk right in front of Namjoon s’ desk. “And that’s our problem because…”
“Well it doesn’t make sense.”
“It’s marriage, it almost never makes sense.” Yoongi leaned back on his chair.
Namjoon moved in to try and keep his voice down since anyone who so much as heard him talk about Jungkook started writing out complaints to the captain. “But why now? He’s been an eligible bachelor for years and all of a sudden, an engagement?”
The older male tried to suppress rolling his eyes. “Probably an arranged marriage then.” He shrugged.
“To a fashion designer?” He winced. “What the hell is he going to gain by marrying a fashion designer?”
“Free suits for a life time?” Yoongi smirked but immediately sighed seeing the warning look on Namjoon s’ face. The man had clearly dedicated his entire livelihood to exposing Jungkook which was something he could never understand. He spent most of his days going undercover and being damn good at it too, exposing all kinds of rings. The Jeon Cartel, on the other hand was a hard ice wall to crack. “Look…you’ve been at this for a long time. At this point if you so much as mention Jungkook, the captains’ just going to let you go on the grounds of insanity.”
“But something isn’t right.” Namjoon emphasized desperately wanting anyone to see under that perfect young man façade Jungkook harbored. “You don’t just get engaged to some random girl, that’s social suicide.”
“Social suicide? This isn’t fucking high school.”
“You know what I mean.”
The two men stayed silent letting the ambient noise plunge through their personal atmosphere.
Yoongi mulled over his thoughts for a moment, watching Namjoon look down at the pictures with a defeated sigh. He understood the passion behind exposing someone who was doing a harmful thing under the guise of righteousness. So many powerful heads still needed to be exposed, unfortunately Jungkook was only a newer one. “Let me see the file.” He curled his fingers in and took the thick file onto his own desk when Namjoon handed it to him.
His gaze fixated on the picture of the woman, who looked around about Jungkooks’ age except with a softness to her as opposed to the other mans’ mischief. There were a couple of news articles that Namjoon collected with that same face plastered all over. A couple of them were positive while others were out to scandalize one way or another no matter how stupid it sounded. “So you’ve never seen her with him before?”
Namjoon shook his head. “Not until a little too recently. It’s like she just appeared out of thin air.”
Flipping through the photos, Yoongi came across one where she wore a brown-ish bodycon dress walking into an establishment. “This is a rehabilitation clinic.” His brows furrowed, interest now piqued a little too much for his own liking.
“You think she’s an addict?”
“Hard to tell. Could be anything.” He muttered, eyes on the picture as he took a sip of his now cooled down espresso. “Maybe she’s visiting.”
“There has to be something weird about this, right?” Namjoon gestured towards the file.
Crime lords taking in beautiful, young wives for no reason was not an uncommon trait but usually those leaders would have a reputation of that sort. Jungkook had been a bachelor from what they knew and rarely found himself in any kind of sex or romantic scandal. Something was going on but much like everything else with this man, it was hard to tell what exactly. “Okay don’t tell anyone I said this.” Yoongi almost whispered now leaning in. “But we have a possible drug bust…thanks to our new mayor, we’ve been getting orders left and right to fish out dens.” He stopped himself for a moment letting a trainee walk past them before speaking again. “The one we’re looking at tonight—few of us suspect that it could belong to Jeon.”
Namjoon shifted in his seat as his heart leaped right up to his throat. Finally those words were coming out of someone else’s mouth instead him saying the same thing like a broken record. More people were seeing the truth. “Where is it?”
Yoongi gave him a warning look now. “Joon…”
“Come on, I’m not gonna follow you.”
“Yeah but this is still a secret bust, alright? Even some of the seniors don’t know about it.” His eyes flickered over to the sides where the older officers were sipping coffee at their desks looking at their computer. About two of them actually reading cases while others watching porn. “The mayor wants a full clean-up.” Yoongi whispered again. “And I mean—full.”
“Meaning…” He pointed to his desk but referred to the whole precinct and Yoongi nodded.
“All our jobs are on the line.” He muttered. “Even the captain…but—this could help us be on the mayor’s good side since they’re trusting us already.”
A light hint of excitement tingled down his spine knowing there was a lead now. While Namjoon would have wanted to accompany the team, the older male had the right idea. The captain did not trust him in this mission. He needed to be subtle if he was ever going to feel the satisfaction of seeing Jeon Jungkook behind bars.
-
Golden rays peeked through the curtains as Belle walked to the vanity with nothing but a crème silk slip and a white robe over top.
The couple along with Taehyung were invited to the Sangria House to celebrate their new business partnership. Apparently the best angels would be readied for their entertainment in the night. Something Belle was not sure she was going to enjoy.
Either way it was always good to look as presentable as possible. The dress code stated that white, red, lavender or gold were not allowed in the establishment for obvious reasons Belle understood now. So with the thought in mind she opted for a deep green velvet dress, a slit for one of her thighs to peek through and one loose strap sleeve that hung off her shoulder smoothly.
The gorgeous dress lay neatly on the large ottoman in the center of the walk-in wardrobe while the woman curled a few undone pieces of her hair.
Deep peach lips and a simple terracotta shaded eye look, Belle briskly made her way downstairs to see how Taehyung was doing with getting ready.
Her older brother had been extremely reluctant in coming to the event but she suggested it would be good to do something other than sitting around. Maybe getting his mind off of any messiness even for a few hours. Still hesitant he silently agreed but Belle had a nagging feeling he was still napping.
Down the stairs as her curls bounced a little in the process, Nana smiled and rushed over to her.
“He’s fine, mistress.” She quickly reassured as they both stopped near the entrance archway.
Belle let out light sigh before chuckling, head lowered for a moment. “Is the suit okay?”
“Very handsome.” She nodded in acknowledgement. “You should be dressed too.”
The younger female hummed before hearing a few voices back and forth as if in argument. Brows furrowed, Belle walked to the other side of the mansion where the second living room was while Nana continued on with her work.
The area was empty but she still heard angered voices coming from the left room. The second living room led two areas. It had a similar design to the first one except instead of a bar, there was another fireplace. Past the couches in the center led to an open archway towards the kitchen on the right while the left was closed; Jungkooks’ home office.
Curiosity and slight concern seeping through her entire body, Belle walked towards the door which in mere minutes opened harshly. A clear air of smoke flowed out into the second living room touching her nostrils and making her wince.
The once angry looking men immediately stopped in their tracks for a moment before waving off the smoke and bowing. “Excuse us, mistress.” One of the older ones acknowledged as they took turns walking past her to the exit. Jongho and another guard led them properly to the door but the womans’ gaze was more on the figure sitting at the chair, rubbing his face.
Entering the office, she closed the door behind her.
His slightly reddened eyes flickered to meet her gaze before lowering his head. “Belle—” Jungkook sniffled, fingers running through messy hair. White shirt a little crumpled, almost half unbuttoned and sleeves rolled up to his elbows. It became a usual sight for the man ever since this new election. “Sorry…I don’t usually yell.” He sighed attempting to messily fix up the papers.
Staying silent, feet padded closer to the table and gently took the paperwork in her hands, stacking them neatly with a tap on the edge before placing them back on the surface. “I know. You haven’t slept.”
“Park Chul clearly isn’t planning on sleeping.” Jungkook almost seethed just mentioning the mayors’ name.
Belle moved to stand behind him, hands on his shoulders lightly squeezed the knotted muscles. “That doesn’t mean you stop taking care of yourself.”
He let out a drawling hum, throwing his head back. “You can take care of me.” A soft smile tugged at his lips as her vanilla scented perfume graced his nostrils. For hours Jungkook had been forced to tolerate the tobacco, weed and alcohol, it felt nice to have someone pleasant around him again.
“What if I’m not here?” Another million dollar question that silenced them both for a few minutes. Even the woman grew uncomfortable at how heavy those words were. Their deal was perfect. But what about twenty years from now? Fifty years? What if Jungkook being married didn’t matter anymore?
“You’ll always be here…won’t you?” He stared up at her.
Belle stopped massaging him at this point, mind crowding with unwanted thoughts and unanswered questions. Too much to think about in such little time. “I made a promise.” She smiled. “I’m gonna keep it.” Seemed the best reply in the pile of things she truly wanted to say to him except there was no time to worry themselves over delicate details.
Jungkook chuckled a little under his breath as the vanilla scented goddess now moved to sit on the table in front of him. “Shouldn’t you be dressed by now?”
“I could ask you the same question, Mr. Jeon.” Her eyes flickered up and down his body.
Fingers accidentally pushed her robe aside to let those soft thighs peek out in display, the feeling of it under his pads allowed for a sense of relief to wash any stress down. All she had to do was sit here and Jungkook felt instantly revived. Even the scent of alcohol and tobacco faded away with her presence bringing him nothing but light bliss. “I like this outfit.” He smirked, hand tracing down her leg so it sat on the arm rest, slightly caging him in much to his pleasure.
Belle smiled placing her other leg on the left arm rest giving him a small peek of her satin black panties. “Do you want me to wear this outfit?” She purposely softened her voice.
The sweet sound tingled down his spine, head turning to kiss the inside of her thigh.
Eyes closed feeling each kiss lurking closer to the thin barrier hiding the womans’ core. Leaning back a little, she buried her fingers gently in his thick hair. Grip tightened when Jungkooks’ lips finally pressed against her panties. “We don’t have time for that.” She spoke breathlessly.
“We’ll make time.” His voice rasped.
She felt her panties being pushed to the side, exposing her core to his hot breath before his tongue licked a stripe up from her slit to her little nub. Legs jerked a little almost locking her thighs together but one of his hands kept one of them still. Tongue lapped on her throbbing clit making it hard to keep herself steady without knocking over the desktop computer behind her; light moans melted out of her like a long unsung melody. A little hesitant but she had to sing it regardless. “Dai—”
Her voice made his heart flutter immediately concealed with a light groan that vibrated against her core. Lips wrapped around the sweet bundle of sensitivity and suckled, relishing in the feeling her plump thighs pressing against his ears.
Belle almost lost her balance as she pushed the keyboard away to the side. The familiar warmth constricted around her lower belly now welcomed itself, moans fading into desperate whimpers to reach her orgasm.
Feeling her hips jerk against his mouth, Jungkook breathed out through his nose not leaving a single break as he pushed her to her release. Clit throbbing between his lips, he shook his head.
The rough pressure torturing her bud as she drowned in the warm explosion seeping through every vein, body trembled in bliss. When Belle felt his tongue still moving causing her to jump a little from the sensivity as she pushed his face away softly. “No more.” She giggled, still trying to catch her breath.
Jungkook kissed it once more with a cheeky smile before standing up.
She wiped off the glisten on his chin with the fabric of her robe and pressed a light kiss on his lips. “What about you?” Her hands pulling at his belt but he held onto them.
“It’s okay.” He whispered, giving her a reassuring smile. “I just needed a little treat.”
Belle slapped his chest softly not able to get rid of the blissful smile gracing her features. “We should get dressed now.” She muttered even though their hands were still slowly caressing each other.
“We should.” Jungkook pushed away the loose curl over her eye.
Whether it was the ecstasy still flowing through her or a genuine feeling from within, the woman found herself in complete comfort under his touch. Maybe something more than just sexual attraction. Not that it could ever be anyway, there was no real use in true feelings for something false. Despite the thought in mind Belle smiled up at her clever captor turned fiancée and felt tingles run down her spine at a mere kiss on her cheek.
-
Sangria House reeked of luxury from its royal purple and gold tapestries, crystal lamps with warm lighting, scent of wine mixed into vanilla while the inside adorned with colorful angels entertaining their patrons. Since the house colors were not allowed to be worn by visitors, many of them opted for the classic black which made Belles’ deep green velvet dress stand out a lot more than she expected.
Arm hooked onto Jungkooks’ while Taehyung walked with them on her left, the three were welcomed by an angel with white attire. She bowed, smile gracing her features before leading them past the main lobby of entertainment where a few angels in white played instruments on the small stage.
Upon observing, a lot of the members in the lobby only wore white while some red ones sat in a few corners.
Belle assumed the higher ranking ones would have more private sessions or maybe there were certain times where each angel arrived. So many things still left unanswered for the workings of the Sangria House but it did not change the fact, it was a quick profit hungry establishment exploiting vulnerable young people who were desperate for a living.
The young angel slid open a door to an empty private room. Table full of light snacks and three cushions for them to sit on. “Mistress Angel and Master Jimin will see you shortly.” She bowed again until her knees touched the floor waiting for them to enter the room so she could leave respectfully.
Jungkook sat in the middle while Belle and Taehyung took each side waiting patiently in a small period of silence.
“Was bringing me to a brothel really necessary?” He glared more at Jungkook even though Belle was the one who received the invitation and accepted it for the business deal.
“If it were the brothel, I would’ve been groped at least a good three times by now.” The woman replied simply knowing this establishment in particular had extremely strict rules and a different crowd of clients.
The comment silenced her brother almost instantly.
Mere minutes passed and the door slid open again bursting with bright colors. A woman with long brown hair wearing a gold georgette dress with a matching overcoat giving her the look of royalty. In a similar fashion, a grey haired male stood beside her wearing a similar design except silk lavender. Walking closer to the table, they both bowed down to their patrons adorning those award winning smiles.
Taehyung felt like something clipped his tongue when saw the angels. The ones in white were pretty but this house owner had some real gems hidden under his sleeve. Especially the lady in gold who perched herself next to him, smiling like a princess from a fairytale that the man seemed rude smile a little back.
“Welcome to the Sangria House. On behalf of Mr. Kim, we’d like to thank you for accepting this momentous partnership, Madame Belle.” She smiled at her and gave a little bow of acknowledgement. “Jimin and I will be your hosts for this evening.”
Jungkook smiled kindly and the chatting began quite smoothly since the angels were extremely talented in holding an air of entertainment. Especially these ones. Getting a lavender and a gold coated angel were not regular feats and only done if the patron was an important one to impress. The last time he saw two of these angels together in one room was when he was first anointed leader of the Cartel but it was all paid by his father and mother. Belle checked that box without any aid. He would be jealous but a jolt of pride burst through him without knowing.
“Your name is Angel?” Taehyung asked, expression softened so much he could resemble a cloud.
Angel giggled under her breath while serving his tea. “It’s a little strange.” She placed the teapot down glancing over at Jimin who was chatting along with Belle while Jungkook listened to her. “We were called faeries before but—Mr. Kim changed it after I was given the gold coat.” She gestured to her outfit.
Taehyungs’ brows furrowed looking down at her dress hoping the princess would explain why the change in her outfit was so important. Instead the criminal sitting in the middle began speaking.
“When an angel is given the gold coat, it signifies that she’s take—” Jungkook cleared his throat. “Apologies…she’s married.”
The princess nodded with a reassuring smile.
“Married.” Taehyung breathed out, feeling like a grey cloud engulfed him into a cold hug. Of all the things…of all the angels he had to melt in front of the one who was married.
Belles’ smile disappeared hearing Jungkooks’ correction. The smallest tiniest detail managed to snap a nerve that had been long hidden with her own pride and stubborn strength. He was wrong. Angel was taken. No real, true spouse would continue to let their wife be used as a sensual commodity for extra cash and this gold angel definitely brought in a lot from what she learnt. No real, true husband would manipulate someone and threaten her family just to keep up a good appearance as a married elite. This was far from being married. Marriage was something else entirely and these suited pigs would not ever understand the meaning. It was a business transaction. Her body deflated a little feeling that nudge of anxiety once again bubbling up but she quickly gave Jimin a kind smile.
Jimin knew fake smiles from a mile away but it did not take an expert to realize Mr. Jeons’ comment changed something in the gorgeous designer. Though he had to admit, she was good at holding one like she had been giving conveniently fake smiles for a while. He did not know if he should be impressed or terrified. Either way it seemed the perfect to initiate the next stage of the evening that Seokjin planned out for them. He gently touched Angels’ arm to give her the signal before speaking once everything was quiet. “Mr. Kim has private sessions booked for each of you. I will be taking Madame Belle to another room and Mr. Jeon is expected in a meeting with Mr. Kim.”
It might have sounded like Jungkook was forced to work while relaxing but he never really delved into the antics of the Sangria House. When he was a bit younger and curious, he did book a red angel occasionally but now nothing really compared to what he already had. Though something he did not like was Jimin offering his hand to Belle. “You don’t have to do that.” He muttered to the woman.
“It’s okay.” Belle spoke a little coldly, accepting Jimins’ hand as they walked out of the room.
Another angel wearing white walked into the room to escort Jungkook to wherever he needed to go but Taehyung did not really care where. All he could focus on was the fact he could now be alone with the gold princess. “Can I ask who you’re…married to?”
Angel smiled. “No one really asks. They like keeping my truth as far away from the confines of this room to make their evening more enjoyable.”
“What if I don’t want to do that?”
“Then you’d be the first.” She took a polite sip of her tea. “Is there something in particular you wanted me to do?”
“No!” Taehyung cleared his throat, cheeks heating up. “Uh—no, I—Talking is fine. I haven’t…spoken to anyone new in a long time.” He chuckled mostly to himself. Most of the friends he had left him in the dust the more he found his comfort in other things. He talked to Hoseok a lot but only when a transaction was involved, the nurses were anything but just highly paid nannies and Belle had a life of her own to lead. Sitting in this room now with the soft-spoken princess, he quickly felt how lonely he truly was.
“Am I doing a good job?” She giggled seeing the little sags under his eyes that resembled she saw in the mirror this morning.
He nodded without hesitation. Her mere presence seemed to bring a warmth in his belly, reassuring him that he was not lonely. That everything was okay even just for a moment.
-
The room Belle was escorted into had a similar structure to the previous one except instead of plain walls, there were cherry blossom designs giving the area a subtle pinkish hue. She walked inside and sat down on the cushion this time sitting in the middle while Jimin perched himself on the other side so they faced each other. “So…why the private session?”
Jimins’ eyes flickered up to the female while he served the tea before smiling. “Mr. Kim wanted each of you to fully enjoy the services we can provide.”
Her heart bounced a little at his words. “Ser—Services?” She breathed out a small chuckle. “What kind of services?”
The lavender adorned male could not help but giggle at her adorable reaction. “Don’t worry. I won’t do anything unless you ask me to.”
“What if you don’t want to do what I ask?” Belle tilted her head. Not on her life would she ask Jimin or anyone to do anything disgusting for her own benefit but she was curious just how put together this establishment actually was.
He smiled. “It is my job to make you happy, Madame Belle.”
Clearly not that put together. “It would make me happy if you just called me Belle. ‘Madame’ is only used for senior designers.”
Jimin bowed. “Apologies—Belle. I looked at the designs you sent in for the House…you could be a senior designer if you wanted.”
Belle giggled lightly trying not to look too proud of herself since as Jimin said, it was his job to make her happy. “Thank you. Let me know if you want me to change anything.”
“That’s not really my decision but I think it’s perfect just the way it is.” He shrugged. A small moment of comfortable silence passed through them before Jimin spoke again with a careful thought. “Forgive me for asking, Belle…but–I saw you were very upset hearing Mr. Jeons’ comment.” Every word sounded so carefully calculated Belle wished she could speak like that in front of strangers. “Part of the responsibilities in Sangria House is to detect signs of…domestic disturbances. Our patrons tend be loose tongued which helps us find out if there is anyone who needs help getting away from something like that.”
“Oh—” She tried her best to hide how much her heart almost cracked her ribcages when it leaped in both fear and a strange excitement. “You don’t have to worry about all that.” Belle shook her head with a smile. Though a small lump still grew in her throat at how Jimin spoke his concerns despite barely knowing her. “Sangria House tracks domestic disturbances?”
Jimin nodded, smile softly adorning his ethereal features. “Most of our angels are from toxic environments.” He took a breath to say something as he glanced behind him. Then he leaned in with a smaller voice. “Angel…the golden lady used to be the mistress of a powerful club owner. I—I was the one who found the signs after a private session.”
Belle swallowed down the painful lump. “Who did she marry then?”
He sighed. “Since the man was so influential, he wouldn’t just let anyone marry her.” Jimin shook his head. “So—Mr. Kim offered his hand. Well…Angel trained five times as intense compared to the other angels so her status as a gold member would be valid.”
What little hope Belle had of the Sangria House being somewhere of help quickly dwindled down back to her original opinion. Angel moved from one controlling person to another. Maybe Seokjin was not an abuser of any sort but it did not change the fact she became a commodity just so she could be free from abuse. A ‘better’ life but did that make it a good life?
Though Jimin looked quite convinced that this was a righteous path for the House.
He could not exactly be miserable about it like she was since he had to actually live through all these routines and schemes.
Same way Belle couldn’t be upset about her deal with Jungkook otherwise it could make her insane with misery. Every time the small hint of reality hit her, she felt like her whole body was drowning in it all. Something so wrong damaged the entire structure of her future. If soulmates existed Belles’ would be left waiting or they would run to someone else they were not truly meant for.
“I’m sorry…I was supposed to entertain you, not make you feel awful.” Jimin chuckled nervously, shifting in his seat.
“No, no—” She shook her head smiling at him more genuinely this time. Her hand unintentionally slid closer to his as a way to comfort the angel. “Please, I—like talking about these things sometimes. It feels—real.” Her genuine smile faded into something a little sad but it still rang with truth. “I need a lot of real in my life right now.”
Jimin hummed in acknowledgement, one of his fingers lightly tapping against her hand. “Well if you ever want to visit again this House will always be open to you.”
Regardless of what she thought about this place, that was the first time anyone ever gave her words of comfort since the ‘engagement’. “Thank you, Jimin.”
-
“We’ve been in casual dealings for a long time now, Mr. Jeon.” Seokjin walked towards his desk after bringing out a wooden box from his shelf and placing it on the dark wooden surface. The lighting in the office had been a lot more dim with rarely any heavy decorations save for a few plants. This place clearly was only meant for business. “But I feel this new project may be able to solidify a stronger partnership between the two of our entities.” He tapped the closed box.
Jungkook sat on the chair in front of the desk, eyes fixated on the box before flickering up to the older male. “We don’t—share the same supplies, I’m afraid, Mr. Kim.” He shook his head a smirk lightly playing on his lips.
Seokjin chuckled settling down on the chair. He flicked the gold latches on the box and pushed the lid open before sliding it towards the young lord. “I believe you do share a similar interest for this kind of product.”
Giving the house owner a look of apprehension, he slowly leaned in and peeked into the box where he saw an indigo shaded stick almost resembling a cinnamon stick. On the left was a small bag of the same colored powder and then a liquid version in a vial. “What is this supposed to be?”
“There isn’t a name for it yet.” He shrugged. “But from I’ve asked a few of my white coats to try this product out and see the effects.”
Jungkook picked up the liquified version to examine it closer, little pink glitters seemed to shine through in the light making it look like some potion from the ancient times. “And? What were the results?”
“At first the usual, loss of inhibition maybe a little sense—then…we have increased sex drive, high performance and concentration ability, pain relief and for some people, a serious case of the giggles.” Seokjin rested his elbows on the table with his fingers intertwined with one another.
“Side effects?” He met the older males’ gaze, placing the vial back in the box.
“Didn’t think you were kind of man to worry about that.” He smirked.
“I didn’t get this kind of success by selling bad drugs, Seokjin.” Jungkook smiled with a slight bitter hint.
Seokjin sighed before nodding. “Of course—unfortunately, this drug is new and not exactly made by creators of your Cartels’ stature. Side effects included heavy addiction, loss of coordination, extreme mood swings, excessive coughing with blood traces, insomnia, sensitivity to light and cold and nightmares.”
“So nothing then?” He joked, raising a brow. “It’s going to take work to ensure at least lessening those side effects by half.”
“I take it that’s a yes on the partnership.” The corner of his lip twitched up a little.
Many club owners usually turned to him and his manufacturers for new and improved drugs that surpassed the traditional ones. Though in Jungkooks’ opinion, the originals always sold the most because they were effective for years. Except brothel or teahouse owners never really dabbled into the interest of his line of work. “Why the interest in this new field?”
Seokjin smiled leaning back on his chair. “I’m a businessman, Jungkook. There’s no field I don’t want to get into. It has been an interest of mine for years since many herbs and substances have yet to be discovered. Don’t you ever wonder if there was something out there in the world that could bring you more profit…more glory than your predecessor?”
Jungkook sat silent as the question lingered in the air for a few moments. Being so young and handed the cartel without his fathers’ death caused a disagreement amongst many associates. Despite the fear harbored by whoever crossed his path, the young man was always on the path to better himself in proving that he was the most capable and most influential. There was no room to be soft or complacent in this business.
“Also the lack of knowledge for this product may prevent any…mishaps from our new beloved mayor.”
Those clever words made his ears prick up quicker than he liked. A substance with similar effects to the originals but the look of none of them. If they succeed in perfecting it then maybe it would make being discreet that much easier. “I’ll talk about it with my manufacturers.” He spoke trying to be as emotionless as possible. But the prospect of his vulnerable mess of a cartel getting some security was soothing.
-
The sessions and a productive meeting flowed through deep into the dark night until the three were escorted back to their car.
Belle kept her eyes out on the window feeling a light emptiness gut after an angel walked into the room and told their session came to an end. Perhaps it was Jimins’ immense talent in luring his patrons. Whatever it was she had no interest in talking to the men in the car. She felt like her whole being was ripped apart, now she needed a few moments of deep silence to stitch herself back up.
Truthfully the girl did not say anything too detailed to the lavender angel but she never needed to. Somehow he had the talent of seeing her story with a few hints. That alone made her even more reluctant to uttering a single word to her brother or her makeshift fiancée.
Jungkook peeked from the rearview mirror at the woman looking out the window wondering what happened in the private session. Even as they met again in the lobby, Belle had a cold sheet over her to a point where he could feel the chill.
-
When they arrived to the mansion, Taehyung shyly suggested that they should visit the house more often which Belle agreed to with a slightly exhausted smile.
“You looked beautiful tonight.” Jungkook commented watching Belle take off her earrings and necklace, placing them in a black box.
“Thank you.” She replied under her breath, unpinning some parts of her hair relieving the light headache that ensued. Stop acting miserable, Belle told herself. It would only make it worse—her chest could not clench all her life. Her gaze still focused on the vanity, she pushed all her curls over her shoulder. “Could you unzip me?” Belle asked coyly. The woman had all capabilities of unzipping her own dress.
Shrugging the soft shirt off his shoulders, Jungkook padded towards the beauty and stood behind her. Eyes flickered to her reflection in the mirror watching her glow in the golden lights of the vanity. Hands carefully held onto the zip and pulled down tantalizing slow, wanting to stand this close to her as long as possible. The scent of her perfume blessed his nostrils, he had to lean down and nudge his nose against her hair.
Belle couldn’t help but close her eyes, chest rising and falling. This isn’t real. This isn’t real. Why did something fake feel so good then? His slightly rough fingers sneaking through the slit of her unzipped dress tracing up her back making her shiver a little. She shrugged off the one sleeve keeping her clothing hanging, nipples now peeking out from the green velvet.
Jungkook kept his gaze on the reflection as his hand reached out to push down the fabric so her gorgeous breasts could be full display. Fingers brushed up her chest before wrapping around her neck and turning her head up, lips devouring hers. Tongue pushed through her teeth not wasting any time exploring every corner of her mouth.
She sneaked through the slit of her dress and rolled her panties down to her thighs. Sneaking her hand behind her, Belle palmed the tightening bulge in his pants feeling him groan into her mouth which only made her moan back. Nothing fake should ever feel this good.
Losing all his sense and patience, he pulled her dress to see her beautiful ass in bare display as she bent over slightly on the table. Jungkook unbuckled his belt and pulled his pants down watching Belle cheekily sway that gorgeous peach. No one should be this irresistible. One little tiny move from the woman had his head floating in the clouds. Nails dug into her skin, fingers wrapping around his cock before teasing her slit.
As much as Belle loved his tongue, feeling his hardened tip had her body tingling for more. Heated arousal leaked out of her awaiting core while she pressed her ass against his member silently asking to hurry.
“Did Jimin see this?” He slapped his cock against one ass cheek making the woman hum.
She shook her head looking at him through the mirror. “Only you.” Voice came in a whisper that leaked of a little desperation.
“Only me.” Jungkook muttered, giving her an almost borderline sinister smirk. Hands grabbed at her hips as he stuffed his cock into her pussy without a single warning.
Belle lightly groaned under her breath, nails scratching against the surface of the table. Her wet core swallowed his entire member with a light ache but it quickly faded into a warm filling that she craved for too long.
“Say it again.” He demanded.
She glanced over her shoulder for a second trying to hide the small smile tugging at her lips. “Only you.” A harsh thrust from behind had Belle’s body trembling in the best way possible.
“Again.” His voice grew breathless, each thrust snapping with rough need.
“Only you.” Belle moaned out feeling the tip of his cock rubbing against the sweet spot. Arms around her body, chest pressing against her back making his shaft hit deeper and slower pushing through his deprived orgasm. “Only—” She gasped when she felt her sensitive spot get tortured, her legs momentarily losing balance from the sensation.
“Fuck, baby—” He cursed in a breathy mumble, face buried in her hair as his orgasm raced closer.
“Master Jeon!” A yell echoed upstairs but Jungkook merely groaned at the horrible timing.
Pushing Belle down further, he rammed into her like an animal. All the makeup and skincare products stumbled and fell over the shaking table.
“Master Jeon!”
Each time the yell echoed, his thrusts grew more vicious. Her skin burned from the friction against the table surface while her limbs lost all ability to have any control of their own. Belle still could not control the small smile on her face. The feeling of her body completely submitting to the beast fucking her from behind brought a new rush of adrenaline.
Jungkook grabbed onto a chunk of her hair relishing in her little moans being drowned out by the impact against the contents of the table.
Loud knocking on their bedroom door interrupted their heated air for a second.
“Baby, don’t stop please…” Belle whimpered feeling her release reach tipping point.
That nickname again made his thrusts sloppy as the warm heaviness in his lower belly reached its uncontrollable, quickly pulling out of her. Juice spluttered all over her ass and back making her look like a sinful piece of art.
Her legs felt like pure jelly as the jolt of overwhelming pleasure clouded every other thought ever constructed in her mind. When she almost stumbled, Jungkook held her gently.
“Master Jeon! It’s an emergency!”
Jungkook groaned under her breath.
“It’s okay, go.” She whispered patting his arm.
Reluctantly letting go of the beauty and zipping himself back up, he stomped towards the door and almost pulled it off its hinges. Much to his increased frustration one of his sweaty associates stood on the other side of the door. “What could possibly be so important that you had to disturb my private time?” He glanced back at the walk-in wardrobe to see Belle completely getting rid of her clothing.
“S-sir the—” He stammered giving Jungkook the urge to strangle him right there and then.
“Speak or I cut your throat.”
“The den, sir.” He shivered. “One of our dens...police did a raid, we lost of our twenty percent supplies…sir.”
Jungkook narrowed his gaze at the older male feeling the deep warm bliss now cut through by his harsh reality. They actually fucking did it. Ever since that scandal, not a single soul in the police force dared to take them down but now suddenly someone decided to play hero in front of this new mayor. “You’re the one who supposed to keep the den under guard.”
The male gulped down hard. “I—I had to get out of there.”
“You should’ve died with it.”
“I’m sorry, sir.”
“Sorry…” God he fucking hated that word. What did it ever solve? Jungkook nodded, rubbing the back of his neck walking over to the study table. Pulling out his gun he pointed it at the mans’ left leg and took a shot. Then another on his right leg.
He limped down screaming in agony while the drug lord merely stared him down in disgust.
“Jungkook!” Belle called out, heart jumping to her throat at the sound of gunshots. Her body now adorned a thick robe which she hugged close to herself. He looked back over his shoulder to meet her gaze, eyes reddened once again with anger and maybe a hint of distress. “Don’t…”
His entire body wanted to melt into hers for the rest of the night. Maybe it would make him forget all his problems for a while but he couldn’t. The mayor worked day and night trying to get one step ahead of him and now they were. Jungkook couldn’t let this happen. He had to send a message. A damn good one. “Go to sleep, okay? Close your ears if you have to.” He whispered.
Belle took a breath to say something but nothing came out so she sucked in her bottom lip, watching him close the door so all she could do was hear it all. The man screamed, sounds something crashing and choking. Feet backed away until her body plopped down sitting on the edge of the bed. This was his job, she knew that. But it all went back to what Jungkook was truly capable of. Why taking his deals were so important. Every sound reminded Belle of how it could be Taehyung going through the same fate. Maybe one day when the drug-lord grew tired of the same face, she would be on her knees allowing him to seal her fate just as he took control of it.
So she took his advice and pressed her hands against her ears tightly hoping to block the reality she was trying so hard to suppress.
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sobdasha · 3 years
Text
been thinking about the really weird dynamics of the Honda family
and the ways they parallel with the Souma family.
Tohru's relationship with Grandpa Honda has always been really inscrutable to me. It seems like Kyouko liked him quite a lot, and the feeling was mutual, so their relationship ought to be close, right? But despite relying on Grandpa around the time of Katsuya's funeral, I get the impression that Kyouko and Grandpa aren't very close after that? He takes Tohru in after Kyouko's funeral, but doesn't provide a place for her to stay during the renovations, and they don't seem to keep in touch.
I figured this was for the convenience of the plot. If Tohru was close with her grandpa, then she wouldn't have no family, no one left, after her mom died. If Tohru had somewhere else to go, it wouldn't be so vital that she be allowed to keep living in the Souma house.
I've been thinking about Shiki, though, and about Akito and Shigure as parents within the Souma estate, and I'm wondering now if this wasn't actually a parallel playing out in brilliant Takaya fashion.
Starting with a recap, because a summary of info is always useful to me:
Kyouko grows up in a family that is very much about Keeping Up Appearances and Knowing Your Place. Her dad is verbally and emotionally abusive and isn't above slapping people either. Her mother isn't affectionate and doesn't protect her, probably because she's primarily concerned with protecting herself from the fallout when anything sets off her abusive husband. Kyouko has never had her emotional needs met and she's never been socialized to see others as real people with real feelings. Before even 7th grade she's become part of the gang scene in a cry for help and attention, and because these are the only people she can kind of understand. Her father has told her she's kicked out of the house at least once prior before he finally makes good on it and disinherits her at the end of 9th grade.
Katsuya and his younger sister grow up in a family that is also very much about Traditional Values and Keeping Up Appearances. Grandpa Honda is a teacher, and he puts a big emphasis on Proper Manners (and probably also other things like Good Grades, Fitting In, and Knowing Your Place). He's stern and pressures Katsuya to become a teacher as well. We don't know what Katsuya's mother was like, but I'm assuming she was also not particularly affectionate. It's only after her illness and passing, probably when Katsuya is somewhere around 20, that Grandpa Honda reevaluates his life and what's most important to him.
From a young age, Katsuya flew under the radar by heavily masking--ie, he made a cardboard cutout of what society expected him to be, so Polite, Quiet, Respectable, Studying To Become A Teacher, while underneath it all being filled with apathy, resentment, and loneliness. His moral compass is deeply skewed--see his teasing of people, his attitude of looking down on people, his bragging admittance to using his father's influence to get away with things, his creepy expressions that are identical to those of The Root Of All Evil (ie, Shigure). He has no real interpersonal relationships--family, friend, or romantic. He's a 23 year old TA who is fixated on and marries a 15 year old girl because she's the first person he ever recognized as human--he saw her in the middle of a violent meltdown and it was the first time he was ever really struck by the realization that someone else might feel the same feelings he does.
(Which, in addition to the dubious legality and widely-regarded ickiness, is just downright pathetic. I'm sorry, but it's true. Fruits Basket itself backs me up.)
The first parallel that jumps out at me is between the stories of Kyouko and Katsuya, and Ren and Akira:
Ren is an Outsider. We don't know what her family life was before joining the Souma clan, but based on everything about her I feel it's safe to assume it was also abusive. A large percentage of the Souma family is against the marriage, but Akira is adamant because Ren is the first person he's ever connected with. Similarly, the Honda family (save Grandpa) disapproves of Kyouko and she remains forever an outsider to them.
In Kyouko's case, Katsuya is able to ditch his family and start fresh with Kyouko. Ren, on the other hand, has to live within the toxic Souma family to be with Akira. Both husbands die, leaving a grieving widow and child behind. Kyouko treasures her daughter and finds a new reason to live in Tohru, away from the rest of the Honda family; Ren, already jealous of Akito for getting in the way of her relationship with her husband (and not dealing well with being pulled even further into the Souma family bullshit with all this curse stuff), and trapped within the toxic Souma family with no one on her side, chooses to perpetuate the cycle of abuse.
The thing I've been thinking about most is the parallels between Tohru and the Honda family and Shiki and the Souma family:
As I said before, Tohru's relationship with Grandpa Honda is very strange. It's not just me--Yuki and Kyou make comments to this effect also, I'm pretty sure. But I think I can finally make sense of it now, if I think of it in light of Shiki.
I think there are a couple chapters of FBA out there that I haven't read (the one with Akito, and were there other chapters beyond volume 3?), but Mutsuki implies--and I think we should take this at face value--that Akito and Shigure hope that Shiki will leave the Souma family. They are not kicking their child out. They want this as loving parents, who have done their best to raise their child in a good home in the midst of a very toxic environment. I like to think they will do a good job of explaining this to Shiki, explicitly and clearly. Akito could have walked away from the Souma family, but she chose to stay because she had a hand in perpetuating the toxicity and generational abuse in the Souma family and she is taking responsibility for trying to end the cycle. She has finally stepped up as the head of the family. She could have walked away, but she didn't.
Shiki had no hand in making the Souma family what it is. Shiki is not obligated in any way to put up with that bullshit. Shiki can and should walk away from that toxic environment, go somewhere new, and be happy. He and his parents and all his non-toxic relatives can visit and call each other and still maintain relationships, but in healthier places, as everyone learned to do at the end of Fruits Basket.
This, I believe, is what Grandpa is also doing for Tohru. He's just less explicit and messes it up at first.
I don't know exactly why we don't see more of Grandpa's relationship with Kyouko and Tohru after Katsuya's death. Is it because Tohru, as the narrator, is prioritizing Only Me And My Mom stories? Is it because Kyouko didn't want to be a burden (is that part of where Tohru absorbed it)? Is it because Kyouko couldn't maintain a good relationship with Grandpa with the Honda Family Toxicity in the background?
The Honda family toxicity shows up in full force again when Kyouko dies. Tohru is a riceball that doesn't belong in the Honda family fruits basket. No one, save Grandpa, will take her in.
And then he invites his daughter's family, which he knows is toxic and will abuse Tohru, in to live with the two of them.
I don't know who came up with the idea--if it's Grandpa, that's a bit cold, as he should be caring for Tohru. If it's his daughter ("Dad, you're getting older, you should be living with us so we can take care of you") that does make sense, both as a reasonable social expectation (which dad raised her to adhere to) and as a power move (the Outsider shouldn't be getting so cozy with dad, and dad's inheritance, without supervision). I'm leaning towards the daughter, as I don't think the family combining was intended to get Tohru to leave. I think the remodel, though, was something Grandpa Honda saw as a good opportunity to convince Tohru to leave the Hondas.
I think "I'm having the house remodeled and I'm staying with my daughter, but you weren't invited, I could pull my weight or maybe you could find your own accommodations with a friend?" was intended to give Tohru permission to not feel obligated to the Honda family. I think it was intended to let Tohru find someplace she would actually be happy, a found family living situation where she could flourish. I think Granpda sincerely thought Tohru would move in with Hanajima, instead of into a tent, and realize that she was so much happier and fulfilled there that she never came back to the toxic Honda family and had no regrets.
Grandpa's judgment was a little iffy there but he tried.
I'm realizing that, if everyone moved into Grandpa's house because it was bigger, and it's being remodeled specifically for that purpose...the fact that Tohru is sharing a room with her cousin is very significant. Grandpa was so confident, there is no place for Tohru in that house. Tohru was never supposed to come back after the remodel.
(I don't know that much about houses so it's possible that they just didn't have room; depending on whether that's the uncle or the son, you've got to have 4 or 5 separate bedrooms, which I guess could be a lot. But this is a manga, they aren't strictly constrained to realism, and Takaya makes every damn detail count.)
Tohru isn't supposed to come back after the remodel, but she does. She does, and the family is toxic to her, and Grandpa tells her more overtly that she is not obligated to live here out of familial loyalty. If there's somewhere else Tohru is happier, even if it's a really unconventional living situation, she should feel welcome to choose that instead.
Grandpa's a parallel to Akito here. He's been becoming aware, since his wife died, that his priorities were all wrong. That he raised his children wrong. That Katsuya appeared to have no real emotions and had never connected with anyone outside of Kyouko and their daughter. (Maybe he learned to make work friends?? But I doubt it.) That his daughter is judgmental and cares more about the appearance of being proper than about not being rude.
Don't think poorly of him, Grandpa says. Deep down, they're just evil people. But Grandpa recognizes that he had a hand in creating those evil people. And instead of being like Machi's mom, who goes "well maybe I fucked up" and then throws her out of the family, Grandpa takes responsibility for the family he made. He recognizes that he raised his kids in a way that caused them to be shallow and rude and to think of people as means to an end, and he also recognizes that it would be shitty to reject his kids for turning out exactly as he raised them. He has to live with them (and his choices), he says, but Tohru doesn't.
Looking at it like that, I respect Grandpa Honda more. He seemed a bit wishy-washy before--useful for some plot and character development points, but wishy-washy all the same. But it's a tough decision, and having to prioritize people is always shitty. Grandpa not rejecting his daughter means sacrificing a stable home for Tohru. Akito staying as the head of the Souma family so she can ensure the freedom of the former Zodiac means that her child will be subjected to the same generational abuse, no matter how loving and supportive of a home life she and Shigure provide.
But they're both trying to do a right thing in a crappy situation.
And Tohru, like so many of the former Zodiac, does find happiness and fulfillment in the new family she's able to make for herself. She learns to make her world bigger, and she learns that leaving doesn't have to be the same as cutting ties. And so I'm very optimistic that Shiki will find the same.
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ssaltbending · 3 years
Text
Ok, guys, hear me out: Zuko is a Capricorn, Katara is a Cancer —and here’s why (it would be so poetic).
Part 1: Zuko
TW: explicit mentions of child abuse.
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I know this statement might seem weird and out of place, but in the last couple weeks I’ve been digging a lot into astrology and, in order not to forget my roots, I thoroughly felt the need to combine both of my most recent obsessions in one post, given that this headcanon hasn’t been able to leave my mind ever since I came up with it: if we applied astrology to the Avatar world, I’m sure Cancer and Capricorn would be Katara and Zuko’s signs, respectively. And I don’t say this in a superficial way, just by looking at zodiac memes and associating Katara with the crybabies Cancers are portrayed as or saying Zuko is a Capricorn buzzkill as people who know astrology on a surface level would assume they are —those are some of the most common stereotypes about the signs. No, I’m saying that they embody those signs on an archetypal leve: in the way their stories, especially Zuko’s, resemble the myths that originate the zodiac signs and their respective traits.
Therefore, without further ado, let me explain.
The Capricorn archetype: the sins of the father...
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As any casual astrology enthusiast may probably know, the sign of Capricorn is connected to qualities such as perseverance, integrity, resilience and ambition, typically treated as the CEO or boss of the zodiac. However, the sign itself has a richer and much more complex story as we look at the deities it is associated with as well as the planet that rules it: Saturn, linked to the Roman god of the same name and the greek gods Cronus, Zeus, Hestia and Pan. Some astrologers choose Cronus as Capricorn’s patron god and others prefer his children, but that can be explained very easily.
The myth goes like this: Cronus, a giant and father of what we would know as some of the main greek gods (Hestia, Demeter, Hades, Poseidon, Hera and Zeus), was actually the son of Uranos, who he subverted thanks to the advice of his mother Gaia to use an agricultural tool to kill him. But as time went by and Cronus had started having children with his partner, Rhea, the fear of his descendants becoming stronger than him and doing the same thing he had done to his father took over him, which led to his decision of swallowing them all whole. He started with Hestia all the way back to Zeus, whom he couldn’t swallow right after he was born, unlike his other children, because this time Rhea had hid him in the island of Crete to protect him from his father. To deceive him, Rhea then covered a rock in cloth to make it resemble a baby for Cronus to eat it, thinking that it was a newborn Zeus.
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Time passed and Zeus grew stronger until he was ready to confront his father and save his siblings from his womb, and when he finally did it, he managed to force Cronus into disgorge them one by one, in the reverse order they had been swallowed —which left Hestia as the last sibling to be disgorged.
After that, Zeus was left with a prophecy, where he would also be possibly overthrown by a son of his. And after Métis, the woman he was told would bear said child, gave birth he swallowed the newborn whole just like Cronus had done with his brothers and sisters. The child in question, however, started giving him headaches as it grew older and bigger inside of him and would become the goddess we know as Athena. What Zeus did with her was the repetition of a cycle perpetuated by his forefathers, a cycle of abuse and trauma that seems inescapable. What this part of the duality of the Capricorn archetype shows one of the ways in which those ideas of tradition and legacy can be carried on (a very negative one, to be honest), but that’s not the only way they can manifest, which gives the archetype this… almost cinematic quality, in my opinion. (And if we take this into account, I might headcanon Azula as a Capricorn rising due not only to the archetypal coincidences but the overall mastermind outlook she has and how much of a natural, domineering and calculating leader she is, but that’s besides the point.)
Now, let’s talk about the other side of the archetype, which gives it this incredible dual quality: Hestia’s path. Unlike her brother Zeus, Hestia was the one who not only had been devoured by her father, but she had spent the most time inside him as well. This is often associated with the emotional isolation many Capricorns experience in their youth, the lack of warmth and love by one of their parents, along with the desire not to become the abusive parent they were exposed to. Hestia is the other side of the story, the unspoken leader of the Olympians, the one who broke the toxic cycle running in her family for generations, vowing to become an eternal virgin and protector of the earth. Besides, Hestia means “hearth”: the inner fire, the one that is never allowed to go out.
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(art by @elisebrave​)
That is the soul of the Capricorn archetype: the crossroads of destiny, the moment when the child decides whether to become like their parents, or forge their own path like Hestia did. Do you guys see what I see now? Are the similarities clear enough?
As my dear friend @persephobeee​ points out in her Capricorn essay (a crucial source for this one): “The Capricorn archetype is a cycle of stuck parents putting stress on their children at such a young age so then their kid ends up making money in retaliation, but then treat their kids the same as well due to the lack of warmth and freedom they had in their own childhood. The intense pressure put onto them as a child [then] leads to isolation and depression. It’s a cycle. ‘I don’t want to be my parent, but also… how they have ruined me’. The chain can continue with Zeus (projecting sorrows and nightmares onto their own children) or it could break with Hestia (the path of love, light and protection).”
This is why Capricorn’s planetary ruler, Saturn, is also associated with ideas found in this myth: restriction, limitation, order, boundaries, leadership, responsibility… pretty much dad vibes, to be honest. Do you guys see what I see or do I have to dig deeper?
“But isn’t zuko a firebender?? Why would he be an earth sign??”, you may ask.
The way that I might be making headcanons about the Gaang’s western zodiac signs isn’t gonna be based on which element they bend, because that would be quite reductive and restrictive for me as an astrology junkie, but their similarities to each sign’s archetype and overall characteristics. And yes, I do see Zuko as an earth sun, but that wouldn’t be his only sign, there is also the moon and the rising sign, which also have an important impact on the individual. In my opinion, Zuko’s personality embodies the qualities of fire signs as well: competitiveness, drive, passion, impulsiveness and loyalty. But to me those qualities are better shown in his character through his moon sign: an Aries moon, to be specific. See those anger outbursts? The “I don’t need any [fucking] calming tea!!”? The “you never think these things through”? Aries moon behavior, right there. But I’m not going to focus on moon signs right now. Let’s get back to the behavior I am the most well-versed at: Capricorn behavior.
So, the sign of Capricorn is also a cardinal sign, a leader, since they are the ones that begin each season. In the Northern Hemisphere, Capricorn season starts right on the winter solstice, and the opposite happens in the South. However, since all the astrology lore comes from the North thanks to the Greeks, Babylonians and more, the seasonal connections are related to the seasons there. As a consequence, Capricorn is the cardinal sign that brings the coldest, darkest season of the year: winter. And incorporating that into Zuko’s character would be incredibly fitting, in my opinion, because of some stuff I’ve read here on Tumblr saying that making him being born during the coldest time of the year would make it a terrible omen for a firebender, worse in this case due to him being born into the royal family, symbols of the power and “supremacy” of the Fire Nation. The fact that he would be born in winter, if we follow this reasoning, would have made him seem as a disappointment to his father ever since birth. 
… or maybe I’m just cruel, guys.
Moreover, I think Zuko embodies many of the Capricorn qualities in the way he carries himself (because no, not all Capricorns are confident managers with the world in our hands) and how hard he has to work to earn everything he gets. A key part of what this sign represents is “the path of hardships the goat has to overcome in order to reach the top of the mountain”, which along with the myth I have described before, could easily be applied to Zuko. It describes values of endurance, hard work, discipline and drive in order to achieve your goals, something that can be seen in Zuko all throughout the series, but changes its focus as the seasons go by. Besides, uhm… have you guys seen “The Day of Black Sun, Part 2”? That is literally the positive outcome of the Capricorn myth made into animation: the confrontation between an abusive father figure and his abused child who has decided to part ways with him in order to become a better person.
On another note, I think it is important to highlight how the Capricorn in Zuko could be seen based on how the rest of the Gaang treats him as well when he changes sides and he’s accepted into the group. How?, you may be wondering: as a father figure, but in a positive way. In many scenes it can be noticed how he naturally takes a position of leadership within the group as well as he takes care of the younger members such as Aang and Toph but, especially in Aang’s case, tries to ground them and teach them. As examples, take the following: Zuko reminding Aang that soon he will have to face the fact that he might have to kill Ozai, him trying to get everyone to train when the comet is about to arrive; how when Aang gets lost, it is him the one people look to in order to lead the group, etc.
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Another thing that is well-known in Capricorns is our resilience and perseverance and, honestly: do I even need to explain that? When it comes to the guy who would get his ass beaten again and again and again for one season straight in order to get what he wanted which would also give him the approval of his father, what he craved most? It screams earth sign behavior to me, but with a heavy saturnian influence due to Zuko’s background which, to me, can be quite an interesting reflection of the Saturn/Cronus myth with his children. Said tenacity could also be exacerbated by the willpower and energy brought by the possibility of him having a fire moon, I don’t know, think about it. I stick to that headcanon.
That perseverance can also be seen when it comes to Zuko’s firebending, given how much he’s always trying to improve his skills. Although it could be argued that in reality he’s doing so due to the expectations put on him to be a proficient bender just like his sister in order to be accepted by his father, and his constant training to the point of exhaustion is just a manifestation of that toxic behavior. I am sorry to tell you, but that’s textbook Capricorn behavior, associated with the symbolism of the hardworking goat in general: working the hardest in order to get what you want is always on-brand when it comes to important Capricorn placements, and in my opinion Zuko is no exception.
Final thoughts.
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Anyway, what I think would be most relevant is what I mentioned before about the Capricorn archetype and how it could tie in nicely to Zuko’s character arc with him as a representation of Hestia, who could grow out of the abuse she experienced and got a chance not to make her father’s mistakes and break that horrendous cycle she had been a victim of. I would go into this more deeply, but I think it has been enough for now. However, I’ll be back soon with a part two, talking about my water queen Katara. What do you think about this headcanon? Do you agree? If not, why? 
Thanks for coming to my weird-ass TedTalk at 1am. I needed to vent and I haven’t been able to put the computer down since 9pm, I literally only stopped to eat, lol.
See you soon, 
a Capricorn sun.
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everything-laito · 3 years
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the FBI agent looking at my computer must be so incredibly concerned. Here’s Laito and Cordelia analysis, Part II
Hiya, Corn here! This is Part II of this analysis series! Part one’s here! 
Not getting into the trauma part of it yet. Just explaining abusive power dynamics and how incestuous relationships work. As well as Stockholm syndrome. Lovely! Lovely combo! Fuck!!!
Same trigger warnings as last time still apply!
As always, rant under the cuuuuut!
Ok, from last time, we’ve established the elements that were set in place for Cordelia to do this to Laito, when Laito’s trauma began, and the possible fact that he was groomed as a child for sexual exploitation. Wow. Yay. Amazing. This is so gross!!! Thanks, I hate it!!!! I know I usually cary these topics with just an informational tone but I just can’t with this ;lskfjklsajf But I’m here typing this, you’re here reading this, so let’s just get on with the grossness!
Section 3: Legal Definitions of Incest and Power Dynamics 
Now we’re gonna get into the flesh of the problem, and what we know happened. From last time, and common DL knowledge, Laito was coerced into having sex with Cordelia. I say coerced, rather than forced, because it’s not like Laito seemed to resist it. He seems to “willingly” give Cordelia that. Is dubious consent, consent? Oh fuck no, and dubious or coerced consent shouldn’t even count in here considering it’s straight up incest. Any type of incest, most especially between a parent and a child, is not considered consensual, even if it “technically is.” That’s how it’s handled in a court of law, at least in America (where I’m from and reside in), and I do agree with that morally as well. A “romantic” and sexual relationship between a parent (or adult family member; aunt, grandfather, etc) and a child (is just gross) preys upon the power dynamic between them. This isn’t any consensual BDSM power dynamic (obviously), or a constructive power dynamic in the workplace; it’s just a power dynamic already instilled into the relationship where it is taken advantage of. That’s not just fucked up incest, that’s an example of a toxic relationship from the get go. Also, there’s a power dynamic usually between a parent and child, but that doesn’t mean it’s always toxic. It just needs to be done responsibly, which good parents (or any adult in power) know how to maneuver around it and not take advantage of it for manipulation etc. 
In healthy relationships, you both start on equal ground. It usually never works out if you don’t see the other as an equal, whether you have a predisposed power dynamic at the beginning or not. I’m talking any relationship; family relationships, friendships, romantic, sexual, etc. Although you older folks might know about BDSM and how there’s a “power dynamic” instilled in the relationship, a chosen and consensual “power dynamic” still involves both parties seeing the other one as an equal––intrinsically. It’s just very different than a predisposed power dynamic. That even goes with friendship too! Or any kind of healthy, nontoxic social interaction! Taken directly from Psychology Today, “Shared power creates happy individuals and satisfying interactions.” People need to be on equal ground in order to have a healthy relationship. Which,,,, we know does not happen with Cordelia and Laito (and Laito and Yui for that matter, but that’s during another part of this series). An article I saw during the research of this explains further about how power dynamics can be constructive. This focuses more on the workplace, but it applies to this because it’s looking at the other person as another person (an equal) but uses that predisposed power for encouragement, empowerment, and constructiveness (like a good parent or adult role model would do). I hope this makes sense!
Basically Cordelia is abusing her power in order to do all this to Laito. That’s why grooming would make a lot of sense in this as well, because we know it’s definitely not the first time Cordelia has taken advantage of a power imbalance to her own selfish benefit. That’s why incest isn’t really explained with the same science as pedophilia. I forget if I’ve mentioned it before, but one way pedophilia can occur in a person if their brain was originally biologically wired in a way that sees children as sexual objects. With incest, it could also work like that as well, but it is mainly power abuse, like most sexual exploitation, harassment, assault, etc is. 
Section 4: Incest (I’d make a sweet home Alabama joke but that’s low hanging fruit)
Ok so now that we’ve gone over the legality of incest, and how power dynamics can be taken advantage of, we’re gonna look into the type of incest (yes apparently there are types) that Cordelia and Laito fits into. Also if this already wasn’t clear or anything, hi incest and pedophilia etc are forms of abuse, there is no justifying it at all. It’s abuse, no matter what’s said. I know these are fictional characters but I sometimes see Ayato x Cordelia and Laito x Cordelia etc posts and I kinda just wanna commit heinous crimes whenever I see that. Just the idea of that absolutely sickens me (on top of the abuse shown in DL already). Anyways, after all of that out of the way, let’s go into this. 
Since Laito is biologically 17, I’d say that he’s considered as a child (teenager) by demon world standards. We don’t know his age when Cordelia first physically exploited him, but we do know that his same “teenage” sprite is used during the flashbacks. Since his trauma fits so well with the aftermath definition of parent/child incest, I’m just gonna give y’all information on that. This is also called “child incestuous abuse,” which is also a form of child sexual abuse. 
I learned an interesting factoid researching this, and that is in Japan, the most commonly believed incestuous relationship was between mothers and sons. In the West, we think of fathers/daughters. In Japan, the media covers more on mother/son incestuous acts; while statistically, more father/daughter incestuous acts are taken place. Just something interesting(?) I found, and probably why DL chose that for storytelling too. 
In this Wikipedia article, taken from a scientific paper (I’d take it directly from the source but you need an account to get in and I think you need to pay for it), it says this:
A study of victims of father–daughter incest in the 1970s showed that there were "common features" within families before the occurrence of incest: estrangement between the mother and the daughter, extreme paternal dominance, and reassignment of some of the mother's traditional major family responsibility to the daughter.
Sure, this talks about father/daughter incestuous relationships, but if we take this and reverse most of the roles, it shows Laito’s situation to a T:
Estrangement between Karlheinz and Laito 
Extreme maternal dominance (aka Cordelia being very abusive/manipulative)
Reassignment of some of the parental responsibility to Laito (there’s many examples of “big bro Laito,” and Ayato and Kanato considers that they used Laito as a “sacrifice”––as a “shield” for the both of them. Sure this isn’t explicit parental responsibility shown through Laito but I’d say he acts more like a family member to Ayato and Kanato too)
Section 5: Stockholm syndrome? With parental figures? 
Laito had some interesting situations occur during this whole thing with Cordelia. One of the most infamous scenes from the game (that’s also illustrated in the HDB manga) is a flashback Laito has where he’s locked up, forced to see Cordelia and Richter have sex. He’s appalled by the fact at first, but then attempts to convince himself that he’s into it. However, I won’t get into the effects until the next part. 
I didn’t find much about Stockholm syndrome being in this specific case with incest and kidnapping a child etc. When you look up Stockholm syndrome related to parents you get quite the sexist “article” that definitely mocks the whole Stockholm syndrome thing and makes fun of guys being into Glee and such,,,, so that wasn’t a very helpful article. However, I’m just gonna mish mash and put a lot of concepts that we’ve learned together. But first, a look into Stockholm syndrome.
Stockholm syndrome occurs when an abuse victim develops empathy or even intimate feelings for their abuser or captor. This happens because any bit of kindness the abuser enacts towards their victim is taken so positively, that the victim “forgets” all the negative actions, and focuses on the positive ones. This isn’t some sort of “oh ya gotta think positive!” kind of thing, it’s how abusers get away with their bullshit and how someone can be so trapped in a relationship with them. It’s also called traumatic bonding or victim brainwashing (source). This doesn’t always happen with people who are held hostage, like in Stockholm syndrome’s name origin.
A parent’s influence can be a strong one. Doesn’t even have to be related to by blood. But a figure that is supposed to be nurturing—whether they are or not—still has power over the “child.” He definitely went through Stockholm Syndrome himself with Cordelia, considering the grooming and the “love”/hate relationship he has with Cordelia. I did some more digging, and apparently Stockholm Syndrome can still occur more commonly with sexually abused victims. Which we all know he is. With the possible grooming, on top of the power abuse and sexual abuse, creates an incredibly toxic concoction. Here we go. The (rotten) cherry on top. Directly from my HDB notes, here’s a snippet from his Maniac Prologue: 
Cordelia: Nnn…Hey, Laito. You are a good boy. Laito: …!! Cordelia: Right, Laito? Laito: Yeah, that’s right. I’m…I’m a good boy after all.  ーー Besides, I’m the type of person who only get more aroused from this kind of thing.
(from my notes:) Basically Laito convinces himself to be a “cuckhold.” It’s definitely implied how he just wants approval from Cordelia; this is how this abuse prolongs. 
(Also, if I ever said that Laito was locked up by Cordelia, my bad; it was Karlheinz who gave that order. I’m unsure where I ever said this, but I feel like I said it before, so I’m gonna clarify that right now too, oops! My memory hath failed me.)
Cordelia’s praise effects Laito in such a visceral way that he tries so hard to cope with the trauma in her favor. It’s incredibly messed up. But that’s the defining factor in this. From this, I do believe Laito has Stockholm syndrome on top of all of his issues. 
I think I’m gonna end it here for now. Didn’t expect to be this long, oops. Stay tuned for next time, where I’m gonna go over Laito’s trauma and how he’s been effected by it. Thanks for reading, FBI agent! And oh, you as well, dear reader! 
If you’ve read this far holy fuck I commend you -Corn
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kuramirocket · 3 years
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Growing up in California in my grandmother's house, surrounded by tías, tíos, and all my cousins, I always felt a deep connection to my Mexican-American roots. Every generation of my father's family has had incredibly different experiences that reflect much about American history. 
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My great-grandfather on my abuela's side, Daniel Martinez, grew up in Mexico and immigrated to Los Angeles. Eventually, he saved enough money to open a neighborhood market, which is where he met my great-grandmother, Guadalupe Miranda Martinez. She had come from Mexico to Los Angeles with her mother and brother as a young teenager. They soon married and began having children. When he lost his business in the 1920s, the family turned to migrant farm work. They were forced to use segregated water fountains and bathrooms and my darker-skinned tíos and tías were sent to Mexican schools, while those with light skin and blonde or red hair were allowed to attend schools with white students.
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Unhappy with the segregated schools, my great-grandfather joined up with other families to open the East Barrio School for Latinos in Claremont, CA — fighting the status quo is part of my heritage! They taught reading and writing in Spanish and learned Mexican history at a time when it was hard to show pride about being Mexican.
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My great-grandfather on my abuelo's side, Catalino Alba, came from Mexico during the Revolution. He met my great-grandmother when he immigrated to Gallup, NM, where he helped build the Santa Fe Railroad. He was a musician and inspired my abuelo José Alba to sing, practice traditional Mexican dance, and become an accomplished classical guitarist. As a child, there was never a family party where my abuelo didn't play guitar while my abuela, tíos and tías, and cousins sang along. Perhaps this is where I got my love for the performing arts!
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My great-grandfather moved to San Bernardino, CA, to work on the railroad and my abuelo José Alba grew up in the barrio where he and his siblings slept head to foot. With little food at home, he often asked the neighbors for fruit from their fruit trees. He was compelled to eat dirt, which he later learned was a natural response to the lack of iron that he needed in his diet. As a kid, he wasn't allowed to swim in a public pool without a certification of vaccination. He would often get glass stuck in his shoes because the soles were so thin and worn out — he couldn't afford anything else. At one point, glass punctured his foot, and as a result he developed lockjaw, which was nearly fatal.
When he could work, he made money selling oranges and picking potatoes. He says the first thing he did when he had money was to go down to Main Street to have his shoes shined by a young boy. He told that boy that he would come every week because he knew he was trying to make his own way too.
There were 12 kids in the family and my abuelo is proud that his mom figured out a way to send them to school as soon as it was possible. She understood the value of education. Even though it was hard for them, she made it a priority.
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This is my abuelo and abuela's wedding above — so classic. I always thought our ancestors were Spanish, but I learned through genetic testing that they were Native American, with roots that may go back as far as the Mayan civilization. We've been here from the beginning!
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My parents, Mark and Catherine Louisa Alba, were so different . . . but they had the same hairstyle! I know that when my dad was growing up it was difficult for him and his parents to be Mexican-American. The hyphen wasn't an option back then.
My abuelo had only learned English when he transferred to grammar school at around 6 years old, and he was way behind as a result. Like many others of their generation, my grandparents didn't teach their children, including my dad, to speak Spanish. My abuelo says that he didn't even think about it, but I wonder if he associated it with a difficult transition in his life.
I want my girls to embrace their Latino roots, know how much we have contributed to this country, and understand that the road ahead is richer when we acknowledge and embrace our heritage. I want them to learn Spanish like their great-grandparents. I'm incredibly proud of my diverse heritage and I want my daughters to feel the same way.
Jessica Alba is something of a triple threat: She's managed to achieve major success as an actress, fashion designer, and business mogul. It's hard to imagine anyone not wanting to work with Alba, but early in her career she had a hard time getting roles because of her race.
"They couldn't figure out my ethnicity," Alba said. "I would always go out for 'exotic.' They were like, 'You're not Latin enough to play a Latina, and you're not Caucasian enough to play the leading lady, so you're going to be the "exotic" one.' Whatever that was."
Of course, Alba eventually ended up starring in hits like Fantastic Four, Into the Blue, and Good Luck Chuck. So, yeah, it's safe to say she proved those people wrong.
And not only is this actress leading by example; she's also taking steps to change the game herself. The creation of Alba's cosmetics line, Honest Beauty, which she founded as part of her brand, The Honest Company, in 2015, stemmed from her own struggles as a young girl trying to find a foundation that matched her unique complexion. "I didn't feel like, when I was younger, that there were a lot of things offered to women of color," she said.
So Alba went out and made her own. "The philosophy around starting this beauty line is about enhancing who you are instead of cover up and turn you into somebody else," she said.
Jessica Alba’s startup The Honest Company is a veritable success — approaching over $350 million in sales during a year in which many companies struggled — but venture capitalists turned up their noses to the idea at first.
In 2009, Alba had a real issue: She couldn’t find baby products for her newborn that were guaranteed to be safe and eco-friendly. After having an allergic reaction to one of the allegedly baby-safe detergents she bought, she developed her idea the same way many successful entrepreneurs get started: She pitched building the solution she herself wished was on the market.
Alba pitched serial entrepreneur Brian Lee on her idea, who reportedly passed after saying it wasn't “very promising.” The feeling that others don’t see potential in you or your business idea is a familiar frustration for budding entrepreneurs. At the time, Alba remarked that she felt nobody took her seriously as an entrepreneur, or even believed in her idea, even though she knew there would be demand. 
But just five years later, The Honest Company reached unicorn status, valued at over one billion dollars. What changed in those five years that let her take her failed pitch to becoming a success story?
To perfect your pitch, experiment
Fast forward to 2012. Alba is now in Washington, lobbying for an update to reform the 1976 Toxic Substances Control Act. Buoyed by her growing knowledge on the subject, she went back to Lee and pitched him again.
This time, her deck was much more concise, down to less than 30 minutes from start to finish. In a world where most entrepreneurs give up after a rejection or two, Alba instead had spent the years between their two meetings pitching her idea to friends, getting holes poked in her positioning,and answering each and every supply chain question that arose. 
Another change had happened over the last three years: Venture capitalists like Lee, whom she was pitching, had all started young families. Alba’s pitch was rock solid, and as an added bonus her prospective investors wanted the product themselves. 
Lee said yes to the second pitch. The first year The Honest Company was in business, it reported an astonishing $12 million in revenue, a number that has only increased each year. After facing initial rejection on her pitch, Alba’s decision to persevere has led The Honest Company to dramatic success.
At first, everyone told Alba she should start with one product, then expand once that was successful. But this didn’t gel with Alba’s vision of a complete line of baby-safe products; the founder knew parents who wanted clean products wanted a brand that could provide multiple solutions.
Ultimately, Alba ignored the conventional advice and launched with 17 products, which many people believed was too many. But because she didn’t compromise on that, either to venture capitalists or herself, the launch was a total success.
Sources: (×) (x) (x) (×)
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seventeensarmy · 4 years
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(3) Stuck With You (OT7!HybridAu)
Pairing: OT7xReader, Jungkook x Reader, soon Jimin x Reader x Jungkook; rest will come in the course of the story
Warnings: a tiny bit angst, fluff, toxic relationship to food, abuse (Like one slapp), flashbacks of JK´s past, tell me if I missed something
Words: 4.204
Summary: Jungkook´s shopping trip brought something home that wasn´t on the shopping list
A/N: I planned to upload this earlier, but TikTok came in the way, sorry
Previous / Next 
Chapter three
“ You're older than me? But you are soo small ”
Taglist: @imezz​ @anxietylovesme​ @holaaaf​ @ot7purple​ @calling-dips-on-j-hope​ @greezenini​ @givebuckysomelove​
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(not my gif)
One year ago (Reader 20/ JK 20/ JM 22) "Kookie, can you buy me some of that matcha detox powder?", you asked your boyfriend who was about to leave to go groceries shopping. You sat on your knees on the couch, hopping to appear bigger so he would see you. Jungkook groaned and looked at you, "What do you need that for?" You looked passed him, thinking of your next words. It was powder to help you lose weight, with Jungkook forcing you to have at least to meals and one snack a day you felt like you gained weight. Weight that would have made your mum make you go on an ice cube diet for weeks. So you felt like your solution to lose weight should be taken better by the bunny than what you could have done instead. Jungkook wasn't stupid, he knew what you would use detox matcha powder for, but he wanted to see if you would lie to him. He started to inform himself about diets and work out methods as soon as he could, he wanted to better understand what you doing to yourself and he himself wanted to work on his body. He was trying really hard to get you to understand, that your way of viewing food, weight and your body was a toxic view that your parents taught you. And while you knew, that your parents weren't the best, you found it hard to let go of the way that things have been. "Baby, look at me. What do you want that for?" Jungkooks voice was gently, but firm enough for you to understand, that he wouldn't ask again. You looked at him and bit your lip, "Well first of all, it's really good for your body, it gets rid of all the bad stuff in your body.", you started and Jungkook scoffed, doubting that there would be too much 'bad stuff' in your body, seeing as you were living strictly plant based. Claiming you couldn't eat animals, when your boyfriend was last animal and you didn't want to hurt anyone. Jungkook had cooed when you told him that, thinking how cute his little dancer was, though that didn't stop him from sometimes enjoying a nice steak or fried chicken (not too often though, because he also had a strict diet, due to his rabbit parts). But not only did you live plant based, you also never ate any junk food and sweets. So what bad toxins were you keeping in your body that you needed to get rid of? "Is that all Baby girl? Just having a little detox?" You wanted to scream, you didn't want to lie to him, he would be able to tell right away, you knew that he knew, but you didn't want to see his disappointed face. You sighed defeated, "It also helps with weight loss" You didn’t know what to expect, would he yell? No, Jungkook never raised his voice at you, but he didn’t need to. He could voice his disappointment just fine with a calm voice. "y/n. We talked about this." Jungkook let out a tired sigh. You felt bad, biting your lip, you knew he worried about you, but you didn't really see any other solutions. Your mothers’ words burned too deep in your head. "I know Kookie, but, the competition is just a week away and Ive been eating a lot recently" you tried to tell him, stuttering. You hadn't noticed that he had moved from the door to the couch and was now kneeling in front of you. Jungkook furrowed his brows, what should he do. He saw your slouched position and how you were avoiding his gaze, he knew you were wary if his reaction, because now it was his move, you told him what he wanted to hear. "Okay" Jungkook breathed out, having decided on plan. "I'll buy it. But I'll keep it and you only get to take some after you ask me. Got it? And no other tricks." He was stern, but he figured, that this way he could help you easier. He just needed to slowly show you, that there was no need for such radical diets. He saw a documentary on eating disorders and while he was no expert, Jungkook realised that people suffering from it, often didn't even realise it or don't see it as abnormal behaviour. So he tried to reteach you, trying to destroy the ideas of beauty your mother gave you. Helping with and controlling your diet plan was a new strategy, but he was sure, it only could be better than the last. Over the years Jungkook had tried again and again to make you see your toxic behaviour towards food, sadly it often ended in arguments. Leaving you crying and Jungkook frustrated. You knew Jungkook didn't like how or what you ate and you saw the disappointment every time you turned down a new dish, because you didn't know how many calories it had. Your eyes met his and though you were happy, this win for you came with a lot of guilt and you almost told Jungkook he shouldn't buy the powder, then your mother’s voice reminded you, "It's important to look pretty, the judges will like that. So even if you can't dance, you can at least be pleasing to the eye" Jungkooks hand came to cup your face, "I love you, you know that right? And I only want you to be happy and healthy" you were looking into his eyes, nodding. Jungkook wanted to say more, telling you that he knew that being happy and healthy was lying in two different directions right now, but he knew that this would upset you, so he kept quiet. "I love you too Kookie, I know you want me to be happy and I'm happy whenever I'm with you" you smiled, turning your head to kiss the palm of the hand; that was cupping your face. Jungkook pulled you down for a real kiss before standing up and grabbing the shopping bag again. "I'll be back in like an hour or so okay? Be good, love you" Jungkook yelled and left the house. You knew what he meant when he asked you to be good, don't train. You already practiced for hours today, so he would expect you to rest for the remaining day. And you found yourself listening to him, being actually exhausted from dancing all morning. You grabbed a book from the study your dad used to work in; you changed it into a reading room purely. There were beanbags and a bunch of pillows and two large shelves full of books. Since the weather was nice you decided to read in the garden, sitting down on the Hollywood swing in the back of the garden. Jungkook was walking to the supermarket. It wasn't unusual that he was the one going out for groceries; you were often too tired after your training to do anything. The bunny was sure that part that was due to you not eating enough, he noticed how after a tough day you would shakily sit down and sip your water. He hated how he felt like he couldn't help you. He walked past your elementary school; he remembered how he would always wait for you in your garden. Sometimes you brought your homework with you and explained what you had to do to him. He couldn't always follow the explanation of an eleven year old, but he was thankful for trying. Nowadays he had also started to study with you. Jungkook couldn't do the maths that you could, but he wasn't too worried about that, he saw that school didn't always teach you what you needed to know for life. Best example was biology, why would you, a dancer, need to know about photosynthesis? He didn't understand why they would teach that, they should have teaches you that eating is fu*king important. He crossed the streets, Busan was pretty, he thought. You would be soon, after finishing school in six months, there was nothing keeping you here. Both of you had a lot of bad memories here. You, from your family. Jungkook from his days on the street, he can't really remember if there was a time before he was on the street. He never met his parents, or at least he can't remember them. He also can't remember ever having an owner before meeting you, he just knew the streets and it wasn't easy. The nights were often freezing, he remembers breaking into a shed one night, because rain was pouring down and the bridge he sometimes slept under was flooded. The next morning he was woken up by a screaming woman, who then quickly proceeded to kick him out, yelling something about calling the cops. After he met you, life became easier, but not completely. In the beginning he still didn't have a place to sleep, it had taken you some time till you realised, that he needed some place to sleep. Jungkook wasn't mad that you sometimes kept forgetting to unlock the shed in the back of your garden; you were young and had your own problems. But as soon as you had realised you came running to him, apologising and bringing a bunch of food for him. When it got colder you started to steal some of your dad´s overalls and took pillows and blankets from the guest rooms, your parents never bothered to enter. All so Jungkook wouldn't freeze. As soon as it got cold you also always started to bring him some traditional Christmassy snacks and tea. Jungkook couldn't believe it when you stood in front of him on December 25th, with a present in your hand. "It's not much, but I thought you'd like it. I got it myself”  you said proudly and when Jungkook opened it, he saw a pair of headphones. He was excited that he got a present for the first time, but he was confused what to do with it. He didn't own anything he could plug them into. You noticed this and handed him another box, in it was an ep3 player. Jungkooks eyes grew wide, "Why would you gift me something like that?"  You grinned, "Because I know you'd like it" Jungkook swore he could have started crying then and there, but he opted for pulling you into a bone crushing hug. That night he fell asleep, listening to the music you downloaded onto the player. Jungkook kept walking, thanking whoever was responsible for him ending up with you. While he was walking he realised, that there was your old dancing studio on the way. He remembered the time, where the teacher didn't come to your house and someone had to drive you here, your mother never wanted to do it, so she hired a private trainer for you, who came over. Sometimes he would even pick you up from school, so you could immediately start practicing; those were the days when you were too tired to even wave Jungkook who was living in the shed in your garden. You told him that having a private teacher had a lot of pros, seeing as the teacher had his whole attention on you, but that also meant that you couldn't dance with you friends anymore or have a group play, from that point on, you always danced alone. Jungkook stopped at the window of the studio, watching the children dance. As he continued to walk, he saw someone dance in the back. Jungkooks eyes grew big, that was a hybrid dancing. He tried to make out what kind of hybrid though, probably cat by the way he elegantly jumped, his bushy tail helping him keeping the balance, but a beanie covered his ears, so he wasn't 100% sure. Before he could continue to walk, Jungkook saw how an elderly man came up to the hybrid, starting to yell at him. Jungkook couldn't tell what they were talking about, but he guessed it was about the hybrids dance, because the man kept showing him with gestures what the hybrid should do. The hybrid said something; his tail was slowly swaying from side to side, meaning he was getting angry. Jungkook had his fair share of meet and greets with stray cats, so he knew when to back off. The man didn't apparently, because faster than Jungkook could track the movements of the man’s hand was the hybrids face slapped and turned to the side. The man had slapped him, the hybrid stood stiff. Jungkook didn't know what happened next, because something wet hit him, then again. He looked up to see dark clouds forming in the sky, he cursed and started to walk quickly to the store, knowing you didn't like him being out when it rains or starts to get dark. As he arrived at the shop he pulled out the shopping list you wrote him and he marvelled again how pretty your handwriting was. He grabbed the veggies that you needed for dinner tomorrow and decided he would try to prepare steak again. The last time he tried to make it, it ended up being really though and he couldn't even chew it properly. He grabbed to already cut steaks, in case he would ruin one again and headed to the next aisle. The shelf in front of him was full with protein and weight loss powders, how was he supposed to know what to buy. He sighed and texted you, if you had any specific wishes. While he waited for your reply he continued to stroll through the market, grabbing some snacks, dips and frozen berries that you could use to make smoothies with. When you didn't answer after ten minutes he decided to just grab something himself. He studied the content of the boxes and compered them, because he still didn't want to just grab anything, when it was you who would consume it. Jungkook was a bit worried and annoyed when you didn't even answer, after he was already on his way back home. It didn't help his mood that the rain was still pouring down. Jungkook pulled his hood deeper, regretting that he bought so much, that he was now carrying five shopping bags. It was starting to get dark and there was almost no one on the streets, that why Jungkook was surprised to see someone sitting on the ground. He scoffed at first, why would someone sit outside in the ground while it was raining. When he walked closer he recognised that the building the person was sitting in front of was your old dance studio. And then he realised who that person was, it was the hybrid who got slapped. Next to him a small bag and Jungkook put two and two together, not thinking much before coming to a halt in front of the hybrid. The hybrid immeasurable looked up, hissing at Jungkook and Jungkook quickly understood why. His hood covered his ears and the rain probably washed most of his scent away. He slowly pulled his hood down, revealing his bunny ears and the hybrids position changed. "What do you want?" asked the hybrid a bit annoyed, but Jungkook didn't let himself be irritated by that, he had seen that the hybrid had a bad day. "I- I was wondering if you are alright? I saw you dancing earlier. I also saw what that man did." Jungkook didn't sound as confident as he wanted to, but while he was speaking he realised that he had no idea what he was even doing. The hybrids eye grew wide, "You saw?" Jungkook felt guilty as he looked into the hybrids eyes. Should he have done something? He couldn't have just walked in there and told the man off, maybe if he was a human, but not as a hybrid, he would have been probably slapped too. "Yeah.. I was passing by when I saw. Did he kick you out?" Jungkooks eyes landed on the bag next to the hybrid, "Gee, what gave you that impression?" the hybrid scoffed sarcastic, but quickly caught himself, "He was unsatisfied with my dancing for a while now, I guess me talking back didn't really help my cause. Who knows, maybe he's right" the way the hybrid talked remembered him of you, before his mind told him otherwise his heart already spoke for him. "Do you want a place to stay? It's supposed to be raining all week. Trust me; it’s not fun looking for shelter in the rain." The hybrid narrowed his eyes, looking for a sign, that this could be a trap, but he only found Jungkooks sincere eyes. The hybrids gaze softened and he agreed, he too thought it would be hard to find a place to sleep, so when a nice bunny hybrid offered shelter he wouldn't say no. "Great!" Jungkook smiled his bunny smile, "I'm Jungkook, by the way. And since we have the same destination, how about you take one or two of the shopping bags?" The hybrid stood up and Jungkook smiled as he saw, that the man in front of him was smaller than him. The hybrid pulled off his hat, combed quickly through his blond hair and put the beanie back one. Jungkook saw that the hybrid in front of him a cat was, which should have made him feel unsafe, but right now Jungkook could only focus on his dripping wet clothes. It must have been an hour since he left you at home and you also still didn't text back. The cat took some bags, before looking at Jungkook, "I'm Jimin" The men walked in a quick pace back to your home, doing some light small talk. "You're older than me? But you are soo small" Jungkook exclaimed, earning an evil glance from the man next to him which made him shut up real quick. They didn't have long till they reached the house when Jimin spoke up again, "So your owner..." Jimin realised that Jungkooks owner probably didn’t sent him out to get groceries and a new hybrid, he didn’t want the younger one to get in trouble, but when he saw a loving smile growing on the bunny’s face he relaxed a bit. "Oh y/n! She's amazing, she'll be surprised when she sees us both, but I'll talk to her. She won't mind you staying with us, we have more than enough room at the house" Jimin wondered how the house would look like if Jungkook said, that the house was big. His last owner lived in the tiny flat above the dance studio, so Jimin couldn't imagine how a spacious house would look like. Now that he saw Jungkook up close he recognised that the clothes he wore were from pretty big and expensive fashion labels. Jimin couldn't deny it, Jungkook was pretty handsome, he could imagine how the bunny would look under him. "It's just around the corner", Jungkook said and Jimin looked at his surroundings, they were definitely in the more wealthy part of town and Jimin started to think about how you would be. Jungkook said you were amazing, maybe you were a lawyer or a business woman, and you were probably pretty busy if you sent Jungkook for groceries. He imagined a woman in her thirties maybe, you would have to be pretty rich to be here. Jungkook opened the gate to the house and Jimin looked amazed. It was a two story building, not necessarily a mansion, but big enough that Jimin understood why Jungkook said, that space isn't an issue. They walked through the front door to be met by silence. "She's probably sleeping" Jungkook said as he took off his shoes and Jacket, telling Jimin he would take his Jacket so they could dry it. Jungkook explained Jimin were the kitchen was and asked him to put the groceries there while he sorted out their drenched jackets. Jimin was amazed as he walked through the house, almost scared to get to close things in case he broke them. There was a sculpture in the entrance hall that he was sure cost more than his last owner would make in a year. He looked at the pictures in the hall, almost everyone had a small girl in it, he decided that this was probably the daughter of y/n. He smelled the place, but Jungkooks was the most prominent, though he could make out something sweet, which alone gave him a comfortable feeling already. "Yah, you're slow" came Jungkook from behind, carrying the rest of the bags. They quickly sorted the food in the kitchen, well more like Jungkook did that and Jimin was amazed by how many things they had in the kitchen. "Okay, you should meet y/n real quick then you can have a shower", Jungkook said looking at the older who nodded, a bit nervous. There was a chance that you would tell him to go, he looked out the window, it just stopped raining, but that would only be for today. "She should be in the living room, I looked in the bedroom already" Jungkook mumbled and walked with big steps to the next room, only to find it empty. Jungkook groaned and threw his head back, exposing his neck, hut Jimin shouldn't focus on that, y/n was missing apparently. Not for long though, because the second Jungkook saw the open garden door he huffed annoyed. "She better pray she only just went out now and did not fall asleep in the rain. I swear to god" there were a few more curse words and Jimin looked at Jungkook, why would he talk like that about his owner? It's not like the bunny could actually do something. But Jimin was even more confused when Jungkook came back with the girl from the pictures. That couldn't be y/n the owner, you were so young. Your sweet scent filled the room, but it didn't match your whiny tone or Jungkooks mad face. "Kookie", you whined, curling further into his arms, as he was carrying you, your clothes were wet. You had fallen asleep on the Hollywood swing and had luck, that it was partially covered, so you weren't completely exposed to the rain. "Don't 'Kookie' me, baby. I told you to be good didn't I? And where to I find you? Outside, completely soaked and asleep" Jimin turned his head to fast he swore he got whiplash. 'Baby'?! Jimin had the feeling this wasn't really an owner-pet situation, the way Jungkook spoke, even if it was low, because you were still sleepy, made Jimin want to drop to his knees. Which would never happen of course, seeing as A) Jungkook obviously already had someone and B) Park Jimin would never fall to his knees to submit to someone. You opened your eyes to look up to Jungkook and pouted, "I was good. I was reading, it's not my fault I fell asleep, I wasn't planning on it" Jungkook chuckled quietly at how whiny you sounded at the aspect of not being a good girl. He quickly kissed you, forgetting the cat that was looking with big eyes, only as he sat you down, he realised he should maybe make you aware of your new guest. "Baby, there is something I should tell you. On the way back, there was a small incident, that lead me to take a hybrid with me" he carefully watched your reaction, while Jungkook was pretty much in charge, this was still your house and in a way he only had power because you let him. He knew with other people it wouldn't be like that. You blinked slowly, "Wait a hybrid? Another bunny?" you asked him, before your eyes found Jimin and quickly realised, that he was not a bunny. "He has nowhere to go, baby. You know we have enough room", Jungkook continued and you nodded, "A serious incident?" You asked and both men nodded. "Okay, stay as long as you need. I'm y/n" A smile grew on both men’s faces and the cat quickly introduced himself as Jimin. After that you and Jungkook showed him his new room and the bathroom he could use, before leaving him on his own. In your shared bedroom you removed your clothes, shivering in the cold, quickly jumping into the shower with Jungkook, who started to massage shampoo in your hair. You lean back and enjoy the sensation, "Such a good girl" he praised, "Letting someone in need stay here. My little dancer has such a big heart. Love you" you didn't know, why he was thanking you for letting Jimin stay, as if you would let him back on the streets. You smiled up at him, "My big bunny saved him in the first place didn't he?" you asked, only to sneeze immediately after, Jungkook groaned. "Of course now you're getting sick. Because you just had to fall asleep in the rain", he complained, but you both knew that in the end he didn't mind taking care of you.
Next 
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evabellasworld · 3 years
Text
Hear the Wind Sing
For @the11tailedlovesclones, this is my gift for you as part of the @starwarsfandomfests event. Thank you to @lilhawkeye3 for organising this event. I really enjoyed it so far.——————————————————————————————
Summary:  Fox and Riyo were relaxing underneath an ancient tree, wondering about the past and the future of their family they're building.
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AO3 Link
Stepping onto a dead leaf that was laying on the ground, Commander Fox was walking down a fresh, muddy road, holding Riyo Chuchi's hand. With a plain white T-shirt and his khaki pants, he gazed at the paddy fields to his left, with the young stalks standing still on the murky water, filled with eels and occasionally leeches.
This wasn't the first paddy field that Fox has seen throughout his life. The first one was when he had to safeguard Riyo from danger. At that time, they hadn't confessed their love towards each other due to the circumstances at that time. It was a day after the whole fiasco at her parent's house that they both realized their feelings towards each other.
Even then, both Fox and Riyo had to hide their relationship from the public, despite a few of them learning their secret. The Jedi who accompanied them were the first to figure it out but promised not to tell anyone about it. His brothers and sisters, Thorn, Stone, Thire, Yves, and Lip knew about them as well but decided to not say a word, though they nudged him about it.
It was difficult to have a love affair in public since he was a clone trooper while Riyo was a senator, and kissing in front of everyone would not only ruin both their reputation but also their career as well. Riyo would have been fired and shamed in public while Fox, on the other hand, would either be decommissioned or euthanized or both.
He heard stories about how his brothers were caught fraternizing with their lovers and were never seen or heard again. His sisters, on the other hand, had it worse. There was one clone who ended up pregnant and as a result, both the mother and the baby were terminated by the Kaminoan government.
Disgusted and angry at them, Fox finds himself cursing the Republic for not only treating them like slaves but also restraining their rights to lead normal lives such as falling in love with someone. Since clone troopers were only manufactured to fight to their death, love isn’t in the manual, but that doesn’t stop soldiers like Fox to lead a private life with Riyo.
It was risky, but breathtaking at the same time for Riyo. The romance novel that she read when she was younger, titled ‘My Dirty Secrets,’ was about an office clerk who met a homeless man down the streets and found a spark between them. As time goes by, they both have a love affair and have to keep their relationship a secret from the clerk’s snobbish family. They both didn’t live happily ever after in the end, as the male lover was found dead in the streets, leaving behind his pregnant lover.
The novel made Riyo tear up and astounded at the same time, as she would read it again and again, just to feel poignant. She dreams about having a secret lover one day and wanting one desperately after finding out her parents were once secret lovers as well. 
Their relationship was scandalous at that time since her father was a rice farmer while her mother was the daughter of an aristocrat. Both sides of the family did not approve of the relationship and did everything they could to end their relationship but in the end, they relented and the rest was history.
Who would have thought that Riyo would repeat history by falling in love with someone that society would never approve of? It's almost as if her parents taught her that love knows no boundaries and accepting of each other's flaws. She wouldn't be dazed if the child that she's carrying in her womb would carry on with the tradition of loving someone that is contrasting from what others expect. Who knows?
“Beautiful day, isn't it?” she smiled, noticing her newly-wed husband gazing at the rice fields. 
“Yeah, it really is a beautiful day,” he smiled back, shifting his attention to Riyo, who was squeezing his hands. “Just like you and the baby.”
She chuckled, covering her thin lips. “The baby isn't born yet, dear.”
“Well, how long do I have to wait until our child is ready?”
“Around 27 weeks,” answered Riyo. “Are you this impatient to see the baby?”
He scratched the back of his black curly hair as if he was caught red-handed for stealing candy from a jar. “Yes, I am impatient to meet our child. It's just that, well, I have been preparing day and night on what to do when the baby comes out and what I say to her when I meet her and such. I-”
“Alright, I get it,” Riyo stopped him there. “You're just excited for the baby, I know. But you don't have to stress on every single detail about our child, you know. All you have to do is to go with the flow, that's all.”
He let out a sigh. “I know, I know, but I just can't help it, especially when it comes to something that is unfamiliar to the both of us, you know.”
“Fox, you took care of kids before,” she placed her hand on his shoulder. “I know that you will be a good father to our daughter. I have faith in you.”
Fox could only press his lips on her forehead as he gave a slight nod. “I'll try my best, Ri. I promise.”
“Glad to hear it,” she gleamed as they both continued walking on the road, rubbing her belly. 
For the past four months, she did everything she could to conceal her pregnancy from the public. Whenever she zipped to the bathroom due to morning sickness, she would claim that she was reapplying her makeup and adjusted her hair to avoid suspicion from her colleagues.
Fox was ecstatic to hear that he was going to be a father, but at the same time, he was nervous. With their relationship in secrecy, there is no way people can know that Riyo was carrying his baby. If they ever found out, their relationship would be doomed, just like the lovers in 'My Dirty Secret.' 
With Palpatine forcing him to work extra hours in his shift, he felt guilty for leaving Riyo all alone in her apartment, throwing up inside the toilet bowl. A normal husband would be ready to assist his pregnant wife whenever she needed his help, but not in his case. 
Riyo continued going up and down in the Senate, pushing herself to make sure Republic bills that would benefit the public would be passed while dealing with her dizziness that would creep from time-to-time.
Fox would check in every few hours and would massage her sore shoulders and back to soothe her dizziness. If he was lucky, he sneaked in a ration bar, which she craves a lot. 
She hated those rations for being too bland and chalky for her taste, but suddenly loved them when her favourite womp-rat stew was nauseating for her. Even those Pantoran milk cookies made her lose her appetite, but at least his brothers and sisters have an excuse to hoard for themselves, much to the Marshal Commander's annoyance.
Hyewon especially would stuff everything in one go while Yves just hides the extras in her secret pouch and eats them as a midnight snack. The worst culprit was Thorn, who had a sweet-tooth among the Coruscant Guards. Not only would he put a few teaspoons of sugar and cream, but he also poured a quarter of a jar of cookies inside the coffee, giving Fox a heart attack.
He loves his siblings very much, but at the same time, he has the urge to just smack them on the head for being dumb, which Riyo finds their bickering rather humorous. Though he doesn't admit it, he does miss them and would call each other every week just to check in with them.
Last he heard, Lip left a toxic relationship with her lover after a year, granting her full custody of her daughter. Thorn, like Fox, settled down with his lover on Coruscant. Thire, on the other hand, replaced him as Marshal Commander and served under the Republic military, this time, being paid for his duty, along with Commander Stone.
His batchmates, Wolffe, lived together with Cody, Tori, Mayyah, and Rex in one cabin, leading a life outside the military, though Tori supported her Jedi General whenever she could, since they're still young and coping with the aftermath of the war. He would like to have a reunion with his siblings one day, but for now, he'll have to catch up on some lost times with Riyo.
As they settled down underneath an enormous tree, with a tyre swing hung on the thick branches, Fox found himself surrounded by a field of pastel pink tulips, which were swaying back and forth with the cool wind. He could only gasp as he began to count every flower that he's gazing at right now. 
He was speechless. Likewise, he had seen pictures of tulips in the HoloNet, he had never looked at them, or even touched them in his life. “Ri,” Fox stuttered. “This is amazing. I've never seen anything like this before.”
She grinned, sitting on the swing like she did when she was a child. “I always come here to either play with the swing or climb all the way to the top.”
“You can climb?” Fox raised his eyebrows, his hands on his waist. 
“Yes, dear,” she chuckled. “I climbed this very tree all the way to the top and pretended that I was on top of the world. It was one of the best memories I had growing up.”
He smiled as he stood in front of her, rubbing his hands on her belly. “Sounds like fun, to be honest.”
“Oh, it was fun. I even sneaked out here in the middle of the night just to see those stars in the sky. You'll get the best view here.”
“Really?”
“Oh, yes. One time, I ran out of the house late at night and climbed all the way to the top of the tree, and guess what? I witnessed not one, but two shooting stars passing by Pantora. Isn't that exciting?”
“What's a shooting star?” Fox asked, who had never done such a thing in his life before.
“Well, it's a star that glides in the sky that grants you a wish if you ever see one.”
“A star that grants your wish? Does it work?”
Riyo nodded. “In a way, it works, though it's rare to see a shooting star in the sky.”
“So, what did you wish for, dear?”
“Well, I wished that I lived happily ever after with a brave knight, and a bright future.”
He let out a snort. “Looks like you only got your second wish to come true, no offense though.”
“Actually, all my wishes came true,” Riyo held his hands, glancing at his deep, brown eyes. “You are the knight that I wished for when I was a child.”
His eyes widened at her words. Surely, she couldn't have wished to be together with him, since they have never even met yet. She was probably imagining a gallant knight that she read in fairy tales, who had shining armour and a handsome look, which admittedly, Fox has none of those. “And how am I the knight that you wished to live happily ever after?” 
“You perform your duty well as a soldier, you protect those who couldn’t protect themselves, and on top of that, you have honour and kindness, and I’m proud that you swooped into my life, commander.” 
He could only hold back his tears as he kneeled on the emerald grass, pressing his forehead against her forehead. His hands were gripped around his waist as Riyo clung her arms around his broad shoulders, feeling each other's hearts drumming in rhythm.
“I'm proud to have you too in my life, To, though I feel that I don't deserve you.”
She raised one of her eyebrows, wondering what he meant. “Fox, don't say that. You deserve good things in your life after what happened in the last four months.”
He could only frown as he recalled what happened on that very day in the Senate building. “Yeah, I remember like it was yesterday. I could never forget it, no matter how much I've tried to move on.”
“You can tell me anything, Fox,” Riyo assured him, even though she already knew what happened back then. “I won't judge you, I promise in the name of the goddess Loona.”
“It all started when I received an order from the Chancellor,” he began. “He informed us that there was a rogue clone who was on the run. According to him, he tried to kill the Chancellor, and we were ordered to hunt him down on Coruscant.”
“So we did. Yves, Duke, Hyewon, Chae, Eren, and Jay, we all had our blasters loaded. We set them to kill since the Chancellor ordered us to do so.”
“But when we confronted him in the warehouse, I just couldn't do it. I had my fingers on the trigger, but I couldn't bring myself to kill him, Riyo. Even though I barely know Fives, he was my vod'ika. I didn't want to take my younger brother's life. Instead, I just let my blaster drop from my arms and sobbed like a child.”
Fox paused for a moment, wiping the tears off his face. “General Skywalker and Rex were there, comforting me. Fives just watched as I told them what the Chancellor ordered, and the next thing I knew, I ended up pointing my blaster at the Chancellor, with General Skywalker and General Windu threatening to step down from duty.”
“And the rest was history,” Riyo concluded, brushing his cheeks with her gentle palms. “I'm glad that you did the right thing, my dear. I know that you wished that you could have acted sooner to eliminate the Chancellor, but your actions have saved the Republic and the galaxy, and for that, we thanked you for your bravery.”
He pulled her closer as he rested his head on her chest, letting his tears carry the rest of their conversation. “I hated him so much, Ri. All those years, he ignored my brother's and sister's pleas against the abuse inflicted upon them, he let them die as they begged for his help to send more troops, he even made us a property that is replaceable. He-”
“It's alright, Fox,” she whispered in his ears, rubbing his back. “He's already gone. The war is over and your brothers and sisters have the freedom to pursue their own life without restraints.”
Riyo took a deep breath as she faced him, never letting go of each other's grasps. “It's hard to live with the traumas after the war. It's hard to face your own personal demons that torment your head. I know it's hard to forgive yourself for not being able to save your siblings from death, but I know you can go through this.”
“You're the strongest man I have ever known, not because of your muscles or the ability to shoot with your weapons, it's because of the way you faced obstacles in your life, Fox. You've dealt with abuse, you've dealt with overworking, you've dealt with prejudices from senators and civilians, and yes, it is torturing. But you know what, you're not alone. You can bounce back from the pit, you can grow to be a better person, I know you can.”
“Thorn believed in you, Wolffe believed in you, Tori believed in you, your brothers and sisters believed in you, and I believed in you. I know you feel alone, but you're not. We'll always be there for you, no matter what.”
Fox could only smile as they let their foreheads touch. Riyo was right. He is not alone in this battle against himself. His friends and family are there to support him through the hard times. Recovering from pain is a difficult path, as there are no right or wrong answers to heal. 
But he can get through this. He will live long enough to witness his child having a family on their own, and he will live long enough to watch Riyo's hair turn grey. As long as Fox and Riyo heat the wind singing their love stories to their children and their children, everything is in safe hands.
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daretosnoop · 3 years
Text
Lessons I learned from the Games
Most of this is just silly, some are actual lessons.
SCK/SCK2:
If you’re going to get murdered, get revenge by leaving clues to the blackmail you have on potential suspects and hope to god someone figures it out
If you’re investigating a crime, being a random transfer student at the end of the year is probably not the way to go, but no one cares because they’re too busy with college applications.
If your niece is coming to your place to investigate a murder and you’re not there, the least you can do is set up a cage to trap any possible break-ins.
Nothing beats being able to hold a gun to the murderer #whySCKremastered???
Teens dealing with pressures to meet college and parental demands
Teens resorting to drugs
Teens dealing with sexism that’s found in abundance in college and work environments
Teachers not giving a shit about what students are going through.
STFD:
If you’re getting death threats, play it cool. Keeps the perps unhinged
Toxicity of fan culture
Throw all CEOs into the closet
Nothing beats Jazz
If you’re going to commit crime in an actor’s community, you must do it with flare
MHM:
If you’re going to buy a Victorian mansion, the least you can do is check for ghosts. And also hire a carpenter beforehand
Never invest your life’s savings into anything
Treat those who help you with basic decency (my god Rose!)
If you’re snooping on someone, don’t give them any indication that you’re onto them
If someone slips a threatening message under your door, open the door.
Victorian houses have all sorts of booby traps, FIND THEM.
TRT:
Don’t trust anyone who’s eager to be your friend
Trust the weirdos and grumpy people
Learn French
Don’t leave incriminating evidence that reveals your lies
There is no such thing as too much food
Women in history have been badly treated by (male) historians.
It’s called the past for a reason
Turn a bad situation into an opportunity to learn
If you’re going to do crime, at least ensure you have an escape route that’s not blocked by the snow
Don’t date people who pressure you to marry them/ask you to prove your love for them
 FIN:
As a woman, if you want anyone to take you seriously and help, you have to be adamant, sassy, and everything men don’t like to see in women.
If you’re a POC, the chances of the police helping you decreases
Capitalism sucks
Police suck
Misogyny in capitalism
Old theaters are amazing
Don’t trust the person who’s trying to be your friend!!!!!!
Don’t talk to suspects about your case
Have confidence in yourself
 SSH:
Colonialism still exists in the form of capitalism
The art industry is completely profit driven
Mexico and America tensions
The Mayans
They never talked about what happened to the Mayans…..
Don’t deal with shady salesmen
Sometimes saving money contributes to a bad system
If you accepted a position, take your work seriously
Don’t trust the guy trying to be your friend!!!!
Master the art of amnesia should you ever need to use it
Even if you disband a group of art thieves, it’s best to be humble
No one in life is going to help you, even if you get pushed into a monolith
 DOG:
This game is why it’s important to put your dog(s) on a leash! (insert that dog vine: “it don’t bite. Yes it do!”)
If we didn’t have uptight rangers, the parks would be burnt to smithereens
Misogyny exists in the woods
People who are just trying to do their job always get a bad rap even though it’s because of them the park still exists!
Gangsters are bad, but also low-key cool
Get back at your enemies by making a fake grave of them
Old people have interesting stories
Gold can release arsenic into water
Always check well water before using
Wood mice are bad for health
If you’re going to get tied up and tossed into your tool shed, keep a scythe on hand
Go birdwatching at night
Torque is a fancy word for screw driver
If you’re a POC, people are most likely to suspect you.
CAR:
There is no job security if you end up in hospital
Sometimes you really need a 2000 calorie sundae
If you went to jail, people are most likely to suspect you first
Don’t spy on your co-workers
Don’t trust the person who’s trying to be your friend!
Don’t procrastinate on a job
If you’re miserable in life, maybe it’s time to sign up for some therapy
If you have a sad backstory, you’re automatically entitled to everyone’s sad backstory
Mental illness: depression
Health awareness: niacin, don’t eat junk food like a 2000 calorie sundae
Don’t dump someone just because they’re not able to give you a lavish lifestyle
DDI:
If you’re going to trash someone’s boat, don’t leave your business card behind
If you’re tired of small mindedness, it’s best to just leave
It’s always handy in life to know boating skills
If you’re trying to report suspicious activity, communicating by bottles is not the way to go
Don’t feed wild animals!
Capitalism sucks
Look carefully at your environment, you never know what clues are left behind
Always make a plan B in case plan A doesn’t work
Don’t be afraid to explore
SHA:
Never trust the guy who’s trying to be your friend!!!
Always trust the grumpy guy
Horses die easily
There is no such thing as over ripe vegetables
Sunflowers should be planted near gardens so that bees come
Respect chickens
Falling in love with a criminal is difficult when your dad’s a cop
It’s handy to know how to ride a horse
Ghost towns are terrifying
Farmers work hard and should be respected
CUR:
Don’t trust the person who’s trying to be your friend!!!!!!!!!!
Don’t be a negligent parent
Before getting married, make sure your partner has a good relationship with your child
Don’t trust creepy people
America and British will always oppose each other
Talking parrots are always handy
British aristocracy was supported through colonialism #got Loulou on his Travels, uh huh
If you’re a spinster, you’re going to be the mom of something
If you’re afraid of becoming a monster, best be dramatic about it
It’s really important to have good communication between partners
Don’t stick your new wife in a room that still has pictures of your old wife and where all the furniture has covers on them
If you have a manor, you better explore it before some 12-year-old gets hurt exploring it
don’t go to great lengths to protect a rock
calling something that skips every generation a “family tradition” is just rude and exclusive
don’t leave your child alone for so long. Don’t keep them away from people their age
don’t write memories, no one wants to hear your life story
CLK:
if you’re going to presume someone’s identity, you better nail the part down hard
don’t blow up the kitchen when there’s only three people in the house and you were the closest and last one in the kitchen
emotional manipulation
gas lighting
if someone mentions stolen jewellery, putting back what you stole just incriminates you
even if you have psychic abilities, don’t be an ass bout it
no one ever tips because no one like the system. Pay your employees what they deserve!
Even though the depression’s going on, people are still dumping money in psychic lessons and dress making
No one ever gives anything away for free
Even if you’re promised money, don’t put too much trust in the promises of others
Don’t be rude to the person who’s trying to help you
If your partner is demanding to be spoiled during an economic depression, find a better partner
People aren’t as smart as you, tell them straight where you left your will.
 TRN:
The dumb blonde joke is not funny
Cops are useless and unhelpful
People are more willing to listen to adults then teens/young adults
Celebrities are much different in real life then in their celebrity world.
Don’t steal someone else’s ideaà artist theft
Old trains are super cool
People aren’t as smart as you, tell them straight where you hid your treasure
Don’t dump someone just because people think they’re dumb
 DAN:
Capitalism sucks
The fashion industry is brutal
normal size representation
Boss’s can be crappy people
Don’t blackmail people
If you promised to do work, you better dedicate yourself to it
Having a healthy fear of giving away personal information is not a bad thing
Don’t aid stalkers
Covid-precaution: cover face with mask. Act erratic to keep people away from you
Concept of older men dating younger women is actually frowned upon
Love is mysterious
Flashlight on the many women who helped decode during WW2 but largely remain unrecognized by countries today
Forgery is okay sometimes
 CRE:
Indigenous cultures continue to be badly and negatively portrayed in media
Capitalism sucks
Environmentalism
Academia is not as research oriented as one wishes it was
Daddy-issues
Native Hawaiians forced to “work with” big corps in order to survive.
Tourism industry and its affects on the environment and native population
Sometimes an upgrade is not a good thing
ICE:
Animal conservatism
Capitalism sucks
International competitions suck
Running away from humans to hide in a cabin and bonding with a wolf is not a bad thing
Never enter a sauna alone
It’s bad business to kick customers out
If your customers are falling asleep everyday in a common room, it’s probably not a good sign of booming business
Don’t be chill over bombs exploding near your hotel
Always handy to know how to drive a snow mobile
Don’t volunteer to be a maid, ever
Cops are useless
CRY:
Don’t dump your job on your girlfriend
There’s nothing wrong with being emo
Men being emotional and desiring love and affection
Men being abused in relationships
Even if your relative leaves you a ton of money, it’s no excuse for not being a good guardian/parent
Don’t trust strangers. Don’t eat food from random people
Customer service is awful. Even when the customer is trying to instigate a horrible reaction in you, you got to put on a smile
Always trust the eccentric lady
Nancy’s sad backstory allows her to hear everyone else’s sad backstory, unless you’re a guy, I guess.
A date in the cemetery is not a bad idea
If your partner demands you to spoil them, get a new partner
People aren’t as smart as you, tell them where you hid your treasure
VEN:
Anyone can help out on an international mafia case
The mafia is very creative and artistic
Capitalism sucks
Assert your independence as a young woman by dancing in a cat suit on stage? I guess?
Money can be found anywhere
Eat the rich
Don’t trust the person trying to be friends with you
Possessive relationships are red flags
Don’t steal a cheap neckless if you’re a notorious thief
Cops kind of useful for once.
HAU
Don’t pull a prank on your partner before your wedding
Don’t invite someone who used to date your partner and still has feelings for them
If your partner is missing, actually look for them instead of sitting around
Crows are amazing
Fiona might have lost her parents at a young age and her life as a hermit definitely had its side affects, but she also saved herself from the misogyny women endured
RAN:
If your friend gets kidnapped, please, at least fake some concern
Don’t waste time with monkeys
The only other person on the island is probably the culprit
WAV:
Girl bullying can be worse than boy bullying
Don’t trust the person who’s trying to be your friend!!!!!!
  TOT:
Nancy’s sad backstory allows her to hear everyone else’s sad backstory, unless you’re a guy, I guess.
Academic institutions are struggling to fund research
Capitalism sucks
Even if you hate your lead, don’t sabotage the team
Communication is important
Even if you hate your job, don’t sabotage your team
 SAW:
People who resist to change just become boulders in the way of progress
Boomer mentality is soul destroying
Emotional manipulation
Gas lighting
Depression
Sometimes you have to cut away from those you love in order to maintain your sanity
Nancy’s sad backstory allows her to hear everyone else’s sad backstory.
If you have to give your partner a gift every time you fight, you might have relationship problems
Don’t be in a relationship just because you’re used to it
Don’t force someone to adhere to your expectations in life
If you’re unable to talk to your partner and so resort to haunting her inn, you probably have relationship issues
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silverliningsrpg · 3 years
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I. CHARACTER BASICS.
FULL NAME: Gabriel Morales.
GENDER & PRONOUNS: Cis Male & He/Him.
DATE OF BIRTH & AGE: January 25th, 1991 (29).
ZODIAC SIGN: Aquarius.
HOMETOWN: Staten Island, NY.
CURRENT LOCATION: Amory Village.
OCCUPATION: Bartender in the evenings at Anchor Shot, and DJ during the afternoons at SLQ Radio.
HOW LONG THEY HAVE BEEN IN AMORY? Newcomer — 1 week.
FACECLAIM: Taylor Zakhar Perez.
II. BIOGRAPHY.
TRIGGER WARNINGS: Car accident, toxic religious beliefs, drug abuse, and manipulative behavior.
Gabriel Morales grew up smack dab in the middle of Staten Island, with a very traditional mother. Gabe knew his father thanks to the terms of his parents separation, though he didn’t spend much time with the man at all. Due to his upbringing, there wasn’t much he could do or say outside of anything his mother held near and dear to her heart – that included embracing himself and his sexuality for what it was. At about fifteen, Gabriel discovered his attraction to both genders, even those outside the two mainstream genders, but his mom was not happy about this realization. It stung, it stung the boy pretty deep as he and his mom had been close for so long, but it now seemed as though a part of him was being crucified for not living up to her expectations. An Italian Mexican boy from Staten Island, he wasn’t exactly sure where he fit in most times due to his intertwining cultures – and there wasn’t much of a Mexican culture, or community where he stayed.
To say that Gabriel struggled with his identity, and his heart as he got older would be an understatement. High school came around, and he begun spending time with some questionable characters. From some hints of addiction, to toxic behaviors within the friend group – the young struggling high schooler had to find a way out of such a mess and fast. It wasn’t easy for him, Gabe was a social butterfly and enjoyed being among crowds of people that allowed him to spread his wings, and open his mind. High school was a vicious period of time for the young Morales boy – from traditional unaccepting parents, to constantly running into the wrong crowds – it felt like trouble followed him wherever he went for the longest time.
Fast forward to college, slowly he’d stopped talking to his parents, and found a voice of his own. School was easier, the people had a lot of issues but seemed comfortable enough to be around, and that was all he needed. In comes Gabe’s first real experience with a guy, where things got a little tricky. Young Morales never saw himself playing out so many insane consequential ideas in the real world, till he’d met his first. This caused him to lose track of his classes, his relationships, his happiness for a long time, until he’d been convinced by the closest thing he had to family to cut the guy off completely. After an almost fatal car accident, Gabe knew it was time to give it up, despite how much it ached. Something about losing your first never truly feels right, and he had to sit in that pain for a year, realizing that part of him may still be naïve to people’s intentions, and goals in their personal relationships with him.
Coming from such a large family – thanks to his father’s adventures – he had to find his place in the world somehow, even if that meant cutting himself off from everyone he knew and loved completely. For a good three years, that’s exactly what he did. Exploring the shady parts of New York, and the more civilized – which was where he met what he thought was the woman of his dreams. She tried, and tried to help him clean up his act, but at the time Gabe somehow knew he wasn’t ready to settle down, to set himself in one place. Nine months later, that relationship ended and Gabe went back to wandering the city in search of where he was supposed to be, what he was meant to do, or who he was meant to be. Nothing ever seemed quite right – at the time he thought it was because of his hormones, teenagers, right? Quickly realizing this had a lot to do with how deeply he got invested in people, things, environments, and how deeply it affected him when it was all said and done.
After that, the newly – yet again – heartbroken Morales decided to travel across the world to get a better perspective of things. Still cutting himself off from everything he knew, and everyone he loved, trying to pin down what exactly was the reason he couldn’t quite settle, and calm his itchy wandering feet, and overly curious mind.
Fast forward to present day, Gabriel, and he decided to jetset it to Amory where he knew his younger half sister Tasia now resided – and was an outcast of the family, just like himself at this point. Which was a small reason the two may have been so close, but something about his younger sister always brought Gabriel back to reality. Allowing him to ground himself, and maybe that’s just what he needed after so long running from his demons. Gabriel, much to his dismay, figured it was time to face what he didn’t want to admit.
III. PERSONALITY TRAITS.
POSITIVE TRAITS: Dedicated, open-minded, loving.
NEGATIVE TRAITS: Impulsive, naïve, stubborn.
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serververse · 4 years
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Sky’s story Pt 1
Sky was born in a city far away from the Tree of Feelings. He was forced into doing what his parents wanted. Sky hated everything that his wealthy parents wanted. He was worried about what his parents were trying. He was storing what little gold he could as well as making an escape bag for the day he could flee from his toxic parents.
His last straw was when his parents said that they had a marriage proposal for him, but they were trying to force him to be more like a girl. He was so done with them, he finally gained the courage and ran away.
He managed to run far before his gold started to run low. He sighed with worry. What is he going to do? He couldn’t go back. Would becoming an apprentice in the next town work? He decided that is the best course of action and ventured towards the next town.
He starts up again on the side of the road. Why was there so much traffic now? He was being forced into the forest from the abundance. So he started traveling in the forest as a result. As it was starting to get dark, he slept safely there. Upon waking, he spotted something in the forest when the sun rose. Was that a house in the forest? He thought.
He slowly went to what he thought was a house, and realized that it was not a house. It was once an out house. So grossed out, he tried to get back to the road. But he found out he was lost. He groans at himself, irritated.
He picks a direction that he was hoping that would lead to the next town. By midday he was tired and hungry. If it wasn’t a tree or bush he had stopped paying attention. He ran into another.
“Hey! What are you doing here? This is private property.” the stranger yelps.
“It is? Oh freak. I'm sorry. I was lost and trying to get to a town or road.” Sky explains and then his body makes a growl. “Sorry, I am a bit hungry.” He mentioned as he placed his hands over his abdomen.
“Hungry? So what are you going to do when you get to the nearest town?” the other said then sighs, “here, have some of my lunch.” the stranger gave him a portion of food.
“Thank you.” Sky said, smiling and eating what he was given. The other ate as well as Sky explained. “I was planning on becoming an apprentice. I don’t have much gold left.” 
“Do you know that you have to pay for an apprenticeship?” the other says.
“No, how much is it?” this news hurt Sky, he didn’t know this.
“It can be anywhere from twenty to fifty gold depending on the skill.” the other said, then he flinched as Sky started tearing. “Hey hey, calm down. I can get you a free meal and stay at the local inn, just do what it says on the paper and maybe things will go well for you.”
“Huh? Do what the paper says?” Sky was confused, wiping his tears away.
“Yes, maybe things will go well.” the other said. “The road is that way and then the town is only a few more minutes of the way.” he points to the road, then to the town.
“Thank you, so much.” and with that, he took off the way that the other said to go.
“Really. Why didn’t he flirt or act like he was going to get the guardianship?” the other asked when Sky was out of earshot. And he went back to his home.
Sky made it to the town and read what the paper said. Go to the golden apple for your evening meal, and the Purple apple inn for the night. On the marrow go to Holly and do what she says. Sky grins, this seems easy enough, and hopefully he can be safe from his evil family.
He settles and looks at the town and how it seems so different from where he grew up. He saw that the kids were running around happily. He counts how much gold he has left and found… he had ten left, half of what the other said was the minimum of what an apprenticeship costs. Maybe he could ask for leniency?
He does what the paper says and shows them the paper. They serve him something hearty and filling. And then the inn gave him a small room. He doesn’t even fight about the size, glad that he had a room to sleep in. When morning arrived he walked out, hearing everyone talking about something dealing with guardians. He didn’t pay them any heed as he went to the innkeeper to ask where he could find Holly. He was pointed to where he should go.
As he went straight there, he met Holly. Holly was an elderly woman. He flinched but came to her, “So what am I to do?” He asked.
“Well, touch an apple and come back to me. But not any apple, one that calls out to you.” Holly said, remembering what her beloved Birch did so long ago.
“Touch an apple? Wait as in the old legend of Nim? Isn’t that dangerous?” Sky seemed alarmed, where was he and if this was a prank? Was this to be a recreation of the old legend and if so that would mean he travelled far enough.
“Ah you know that legend well, this is a test of you.” Holly said, smiling at how this young one is at least aware that the apples are dangerous.
Sky steeled himself and sees the Tree of Feelings. He was shocked, but he ignored the low hanging apples. He was sure that would lead to death. He didn’t like this. Why doesn’t he get a chance of actually doing anything? He touches the trunk, and like a being with a mission, climbed the tree. He avoided all the apples til he got to the very top and reached for an apple. Now that he touched one everything is over right? He screamed and fell from the branch, his soul hurting badly. Holly caught him and laid him down.
“Ladies and Gentlemen! The new Guardian has been found! The contest is over!” Holly says with tired yet happy eyes.
“Wait he passed? He couldn’t have Auntie.” the one that told Sky where to go and helped him the day before, sounding very upset.
“Star, he did know that the apples are dangerous, and didn’t go for the easy path. He did touch a negative apple so he must be the new guardian.” Holly explains.
“But he… he must be like the rest, only wanting power!” Star was not happy. He looked at the crumpled Sky with fear.
“Star, stop. All you have to do is ask the village if he did anything like the rest, but the tradition has been fulfilled.” Holly said sternly to Star.
Sky had listened to this as the pain finally ebbed. “Guardian? That can’t be right. I can’t be a guardian. W-what is going on? I thought that I was going to have an apprenticeship with Holly! N-not do something that deals with this!”
Holly snorted from this. He reminded her so much of Birch. “What is your name?”
“S-sky, I am Sky.” Star made a funny noise hearing the name. It matches like all the past guardians.
“Well, with you completing the test, you and Star are married.” Holly said with a laugh.
“What?!” Sky was floored, fainting right after. Star just looked at Sky in confusion. He really didn’t know anything. And… he then scoops up his now married spouse and takes him to the Guardian’s Cottage.
Holly smiled; she was glad that one that didn’t want the powers actually got them. More and more were just wanting access to the apples. She understood Star’s reluctance to Sky, but Sky was much like the Nightmare from the tales. What made this happen?
When Sky regained consciousness, he looked over at Star. “If I failed, would I have been killed or would I have been stopped?”
Star looks down. “We don’t stop people from fate.”
Sky looks down. “So, I was actually sent to die? Where does all this, besides me accidentally entering your lands, say I deserve this fate?”
“Look I’m sorry. I was tired of everyone hitting on me and asking me to help them get the correct apple to be able to be the next guardian. I put that all on you thinking that you were lying about being there accidentally. Uncle Birch dying so suddenly was big news. I am sure you heard of it.” Star sighed out. He gave Sky a look and when Sky was blank, “You had to have heard about his death, right?”
“He died? I… no, I haven't. That would explain why I was being forced off the road and those people in the inn. I just thought that it was an influx of trading.” Sky said truthfully.
Star now felt guilty. He should have figured that the other was saying the truth instead of actually thinking the worst. He did feel the desperation and pain from the other, but thought it nothing but a ploy. “I’m going to go to town and get some things. You need some time to recover from being turned into a guardian.”
“I… alright.” Sky was a bit worried about this marriage. He ran away to prevent himself from getting married. And given how his parents were, he was scared.
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edmund-valks · 4 years
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Prelude Night (Ilandreline)
Winter's Veil was confusing.  Greatfather Winter?  Ugly sweaters and brightly wrapped gifts?  The traditions were not hers, not did she understand how they had originated.  Not that it really mattered -- her friends were into it, so she would do her best to participate.
For herself, though, Ilandreline stuck to little bits of the family rites.  She'd purchased her candle long ago.  Two, actually, to test the seller's claim that it would yield both non-toxic smoke and dark purple light.  It could only be better if there was one that made things darker, but that audience was likely too limited for any shop to worry about them.
Despite recent events, she left the safety of the Respite.  Not unarmed, of course; there was no requirement to be weaponless for these things.  In fact, it was extremely ill-advised to do so.  Between excitable relatives and unspeakable horrors from beyond, the odds of dying on Prelude Night were actually significantly higher than on almost any other.  Her satchel carried the usual implements: a heavy wrench, a small sledge, her trusty bonesaw, and an array of grenades.  Also the candle and a handheld firestarter, because flint and steel were a pain in the ass.
A wiser person would have used the lookout camp.  That would have been a great idea, far enough removed to be mostly private, still close enough to avoid being truly alone on the most ominous night of the year.  Ila didn’t think much of great ideas, though, or being a wiser person.  She did just fine as she was; no need to change.  As such, she left the protective barrier of the Warding Tree, headed for a little spot she’d found nearby.
It wasn’t too far a walk, though the distance was enough to make her glad she’d worn her heaviest coat.  It was her warmest as well as the most protective -- an excellent dual-purpose item considering the number of mindless dead who would very much enjoy a warm-blooded meal on a cold night.  By the time she reached the cave, the hood’s fur trim was beginning to frost over, her breath having frozen amidst the soft hairs.
Just inside the jagged opening, Ilandreline turned around to scratch several crude symbols into the ground.  Two more followed in an ink that was only easily viewed with peripheral vision, one on either side, and then a final overhead.  She said the prayers, such as they were, the words echoing in her mind.  It was her voice that spoke, she knew, but all she could hear was the thousandfold reverberation of whispers from within.  The truest darkness was never empty, after all, especially when daylight was at its weakest.
A barrier flickered between the sigils, visible for only the briefest moment.  If she’d done it right -- and the weird thrumming inside her indicated she had -- it would disguise the opening entirely from passersby.  It would also turn aside the senses of the ghouls who roamed Silverpine, preventing them from taking her unaware.  At least in theory.
Faith, a voice whispered in her mind, keep always the faith.  You will be rewarded at the end.  It sounded like her mother this time.  An interesting choice, considering the two had never been particularly close.  But Mom had been the better of her parents at explaining the family’s peculiar religion, so maybe it made the most sense.
The cave was empty, its dirt floor hard packed and almost smooth from her work over the last ten days.  She placed a bowl in what passed for the center of the space, gently mashing the candle’s base into it.  Just so.  Now it would stand properly.  She pushed back her hood, forcing the sudden cold from her mind.  After several slow, shivering breaths, her goggles came off as well.  Her eyes were closed, of course, but not for much longer.  If she was going to do this, she’d have to open them.
Ilandreline relaxed, sort of.  There was a way to force the body to act relaxed, even when it wasn’t, and she’d had to learn it many, many years ago.  They all had, or else they hadn’t survived very long.  She went through her body mentally, muscle by muscle, unwinding those that hadn’t obeyed her initial command.  When the last finally uncoiled, she knew it was time.  Her eyes opened to the blinding dark.
Decades, perhaps centuries, before she was born, her family had abandoned the Sunwell.  The arcane was, they’d decided, not for them.  Maybe it was because the magisters were irritating; maybe it was the insistence that laws were supposed to be followed.  The details were never made particularly clear to her and they were rather moot at this point anyway.  No explanation would change the simple reality: her ancestors had sworn the family to that which lurked between the stars, the infinite blackness and mind-shattering horrors.  That was why they’d been exiled, of course; the quel’dorei authorities didn’t want anyone to know there was an alternative to the Sunwell.  Not needing the Sunwell meant not being subject to the magisters’ authority, and who among them could countenance such a thing?
A side effect of their unique independence was the peculiar vision she was using now.  If one took normal sight and replaced every colour with its opposite, that would almost explain what she saw.  There was more to it, though.  Like the way certain areas of emptiness could be seen from the corner of the eye, except they weren’t really emptiness at all.  They were quite full instead, though that fullness was composed of nothingness.  Those were the spots you had to ignore.  She refused to engage with them, even when images of lidless eyes or lamprey-like mouths flickered there, taunting.
Ilandreline pulled her firestarter from the bag, ignited the candle.  “A single light, flickering weakly,” she intoned in the other language she’d been raised with, the one far older than Thalassian.  “The last remnant of a dying sun, full of terrible promise and beguiling lies.  A tyranny of ill-advised order, never meant to withstand the endless dark.”
A prick of a finger then; a drop of blood on the burning wick.  Instead of smothering the flame, this fed it, the candle emitting a burst of light not unlike pouring fuel onto a bonfire.  “Our gift to you, this living blood, and a reminder of our bonds.  Our sacrifice is your gain, your whispers our knowledge.  All in service to the last fading of the light.”
Another drop.  “I’ve done little to bring the final darkening this year.  I don’t think anyone expected me to do differently.”  She was speaking Thalassian now.  Her vocabulary was too limited in the ritual tongue to do this part.  “I’m not like the rest of my family, you know.  They’re big into all this stuff, they’ve got goals.  Me, I’m just trying to do the things I’m good at, stand on my own.  I figure it’s not too big a deal that I’m not super involved anymore.  Sure, you don’t get a lot of blood sacrifice from me, but I also never use your power, so I figure we’re pretty even.”
The third drop.  “Under the circumstances, I’m not asking for anything, not even that you keep watch over these friends I’ve found.  They may not thank me for that kind of attention, for one, and I haven’t any offerings to seal such a pact.  The Long Night will come, I know, but I’ll leave that to my family to worry about.  We both know they’re always working toward it, and by not sticking around and having to kill more of them off, I’ve probably helped you more by leaving.”  She smiled at the thought.
Blood drop number four; the most important.  She watched it fall, looking for that special sign -- ah, there it was.  The redness hung suspended over the violet flame for an eyeblink, quivering, full of potentiality.  Then the fire consumed it, as, of course, it must.  Once again the rite spilled from Ila’s lips.  “Four for four, given by one.  Less than five, but greater by far.  After life, beyond death, the Long Night comes.  We kill to serve.  We bleed to live.  Through our sacrifice, the light shall die at last.”
She extinguished the candle as she spoke the final sentence, pinching out the flickering light.  As always, it hurt more than any other burn she’d ever experienced.  As always, it left no visible trace, simply the throbbing, bone-deep ache.  Rolling her shoulders to work out the stiffness that had settled during her obeisance, Ilandreline slowly got back to her feet.  The leather strap attached to her tinted lenses remained unbuckled for the moment, lying atop the contents of her pack.  Stretching out a hand, she traced her last rune for the night on the notional plane created by the sigil-conjured barrier.  There was no proper translation for the word represented by this symbol, though “consume” came close.  The barrier vanished, the patterns that had created it burning away as if they’d never been.
Stepping into the freezing dark, she pulled up her hood.  Another year gone, she mused, though this one suggested potential for the next.  Hope, even, something she hadn’t realized was missing.  Smiling, Ila turned her black eyes skyward.
It took a moment to realize there were no stars in her vision at all.  An omen, her mother’s voice whispered again, flitting through her mind like a bat in flight.  And what a glorious one it is, to look on the Eternal Dark before it has come!  There was a certain extra spring in her step as she returned to the Respite, goggles forgotten in her satchel.
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swluminekin · 4 years
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My decade.
2010: You graduate college! It’s supposed to be a great year! Only it’s not. Your  mother makes your graduation about her (which ends up being a reoccurring thing over the decade, you’ll find). You have difficulty trying to find a job for longer than “temporary” or “seasonal.” Your godmother passes away due to cancer. Your grandmother has a stroke. But hey, at least you worked on the yard that really needed work and you got a new kitten... right? And hey, end of the year you’ve been with your girlfriend for two years.
2011: You start taking classes again. You want to get better in your field of study but also have to take some business courses that your parents want you to take. You continue to try and find a job, only able to find a temporary one that is off and on for a publishing company that makes and grades “standardized tests” for various states.
2012: You’re taking classes still, but you finally find a job that’s steady. Sure it’s minimum wage, but you have a roof over your head and you don’t have to pay your parents rent (yet). Things are going alright for the most part?
2013: You’re forced to stop taking classes as your student loans really kick in. You aren’t making much more money and it’s really kicking your ass. You can still spend time with your girlfriend and go to conventions. You’re doing okay, but you know you can do better. This is also when the job you have starts acting strange and starts to trade management companies.
2014: You’re not making much more than minimum wage. Sure you can spend time with your girlfriend but it’s getting ridiculous with how many times your workplace has changed management companies. It’s time to change jobs - and you do. After two long weeks, you finally get to your new job that’s local and you’re actually making more. You have cool manager and fit it perfectly. It’s a dream. Sure all jobs have their issues but you like it here. Conventions are still good and you’re doing alright.
2015: Yay! Gay marriage is legal across the board in your country! Great time to be you, right? Only it’s not. You’ve known since high school that your mother is homophobic and you had learned that you’re bi. You’re not surprised that not only did she ask you/call you out about it about it, but when you actually announced it to others that you got backlash from her. Your girlfriend is no longer allowed to spend the night if they’re there. She flat out asks that if you were to get married to a girl, if she can “pretend it’s a guy” during the ceremony. It still stings. She calls you autistic, insulting you and people with autism. You start having to pay rent every paycheck - $50 per, but it’s not terrible at the start. She and your dad also make you get a “big girl job” because they want you in a job like theirs. And you do... for two months. Call centers are not your thing, especially since you have high anxiety. You get to go to Texas Ren Fair for your birthday. You go back to your former job - the one you like - and they take you back with open arms. And hey! You’re back in time for the holidays, so bonus! Oh! And you start watching Mark and Jack during this year! Great! You meet a new guy friend this year and you hit it off really well.
2016: You had it rough before? No, this year is hell. And it wasn’t actually your fault, but you get the brunt of it. It was because two former friends (one of who is a mutual ex-boyfriend with your girlfriend because you were the “other girl”) cause you hell. You and your girlfriend go on break for about two months but are still friends. One of the hell-raisers makes your life even worse and sends a message to your mother, making both your parents hate you. A couple of your friends help you try and figure things out. You realize that you do need to start changing a bit, but that also the hell-raisers are just straight up jerks. You get back with your girlfriend. Your parents eventually remember you aren’t a nightmare child but your relationship is never the same. This is the last time you see your mother’s family for almost two years. Why? Because she has her reasons and never clearly tells you. You also lose your grandfather on your dad’s side the day after your birthday. Halloween is spent driving back home after the funeral because you’re parents decided to take their camper to “save money” on hotel rooms. You also have to buy a car because of various events that happen that you just don’t like talking about. Literally the only things getting you through this year are your out-of-state friends that you talk to over Skype, your girlfriend, your local friends and the Youtubers you watch (Mark, Jack, Naka and the Yogscast). You also start realizing more and more that you are not just bisexual, but pansexual... as well as polyamorous.
2017: You’re basically paying every single bill other than utilities and groceries now - loans, insurances, car, (low) rent. You’re not surprised and you’re budgeting very well. And hey! Look at that! You get to meet two of your out-of-state friends and it’s great! You also get to go to your first Wizard World which is amazing because you get to meet Nichele Nichols and Michael Rooker! Your Halloween wasn’t exactly the best, though... And you also found out that one of those people who caused you hell last year (2016) still wants to give you hell so you have to start blocking them (if you can) before they start following you. You also are forced to start warning your various online friends that if those two start to try and follow or make nice nice with them, why it is and what they’ve done to you. You also are informed later in the year that your parents are wanting to move back to Kansas after your dad retires - and you don’t want to.
2018: It’s crunch time to find a place to stay before you’re forced to move with your parents. You just barely do it, considering yourself lucky that a local woman was willing to take you in (yes you’re paying rent, but you have your bill paying down now). You’re a little upset that you’re girlfriend doesn’t want to move out with you - having figured this would be a step for both of you - but you shrug it off for a while. You start to reconnect with your mother’s family since she’s two states away. No conventions this year even though you want to so badly, but you just can’t afford it. You figure it’s okay, though. You’re working hard and you’re doing your best to stay where you are. Two of your friends move half a country away and you have a farewell dinner with them with your girlfriend, your boyfriend (the guy friend from three years ago) and your girlfriend’s boyfriend. You get closer with the Jacksepticeye community, taking part in a project and actually talking with more people. You gain a small family of online friends. Halloween and your birthday are still rough and you’re trying to figure out why. At Christmas you take your first plane trip in 29 years up to Kansas to see your parents new place and also to spend time with them for the holiday, flying back down New Years Eve to spend time with your girlfriend and give her that traditional midnight kiss while on call with your online family.
2019: You lose one of your online family because they wanted you out of their life. You still try to help them but they treat you like garbage until they try to apologize. You tell them they hurt you and how when you tried to help them they pushed you away. You tell them it would take a while to be friends again and they block you. You lose someone else who you thought was a friend but turned out to be extremely toxic. Honestly, this is for the better. You lose the will to theorize for a while due to a couple of incidents in two different communities. You eventually get back up and write a theory that others like as well. You eventually find your own sort of art style and enjoy it, and apparently so do others! You start donating more and feel like you’re actually doing something for the world. You break it off with your girlfriend of 10 1/2 years. You had been more like friends since before the move last year and things felt off. You realize how much you love your boyfriend and how much he loves you. You’re working hard and even got a little bit of a raise! Once again no conventions this year and you really miss them, but you’re saving up for that one day when you’ll eventually get to meet Jack at a con and you’re doing so well at it too. You’re playing games again, You actually feel free and you turn 32. Birthday and Halloween are still bad - you figure they have some sort of curse on them now. The rest of the year goes smoothly with some hiccups here and there but everything works out. Also, toward the end of the year, you learn that while you’re pansexual and polyamorus, you find more and more that your love comes from that bond that you gain once you actually know people and start asking if there is something like that. Maybe your a demi-pan? You’re still unsure.
2020: You’re excited for a new year and a new decade, hoping it will be better than the last. You you have people who love you, you have everything planned out. Things are good. So far on this first day, though, you have a slight hiccup in your happiness as your friend puts up a blatant lie about something that happened a year ago. You have the support of your online family though, especially since you were on call with two of them when the thing happened. Things will be better this year and this decade. You can feel it.
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blackfreethinkers · 4 years
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This is where helicoptering and black mothering diverge. While helicopter moms are busy multiplying their children’s privilege and advantages, many black moms are fighting to protect their children from the structural disadvantages that keep opportunity just out of reach.
The burden of inequality
Even in an age of rising inequality, white children find socioeconomic mobility easier to come by than do black children. In Richard Chetty’s landmark study of 20 million Americans, one in 10 black kids who grew up poor made it to the top two quintiles of earners as adults. For white kids, that figure was one in four.
Inequality follows black children to school, a place traditionally seen as a vehicle for mobility. Black children are disciplined more often and more harshly than their white classmates. They are more likely to be arrested in school—in part because they are more likely to have police officers stationed at their schools. From preschool (pdf) onward, black children are suspended at almost four times the rate of their white peers, and research shows that teachers are more likely to expect black children, and especially black boys, to display “challenging behavior” even before they do anything wrong.
The threats extend beyond the classroom. Black teens go to jail for committing fewer crimes than their white counterparts. Black children are overrepresented in arrests for nebulous, low-level charges like loitering, breaking curfew, and suspicion. During the admissions scandal, many observers pointed out that black mothers had faced criminal charges for trying to get their kids into better schools, too—under very different circumstances. Tanya McDowell (sometimes written as Tonya) was charged with larceny for “stealing” $15,000 from Norwalk, Connecticut by sending her son to a public school there when they actually lived in homeless shelters in nearby, poorer Bridgeport. Kelley Williams-Bolar was sentenced to jail in Ohio for using her father’s address to send her kids to a better-funded public school.
“When my child comes to me and tells me something is wrong, I believe my children first.” These fundamentally different odds create separate motivations for black and white parents to be protective, even when they share class backgrounds. Riché Barnes, an anthropologist at Yale and the author of Raising the Race: Black Career Women Redefine Marriage, Motherhood, and Community, says the term “good school” holds different meanings for some black families. While white parents might be looking for schools that are mostly white and have high test scores, those same environments can actually hurt black students.
Research shows that non-black teachers routinely underestimate black children’s academic potential. Black kids who have had at least one black teacher by third grade are 7% more likely to graduate from high school and 13% more likely to enroll in college than their counterparts without black teachers.
In light of these statistics, Barnes says black parents are beginning to think, “Maybe my kids are better off in a school where the teachers love them and care about them and their heritage and want to teach them to love themselves and their heritage. And that ends up being just as important as if you do well on that test.”
For Winnie Caldwell, a 30-year-old mom raising her son in St. Louis, the challenge of finding the right school for her child came into focus in 2014, when her son was one of two black children in his third grade class. It was the year that Michael Brown, a black teenager, was killed by a white police officer in nearby Ferguson, Missouri. Caldwell says her son’s teacher, who was white, asked the class about the shooting and made it clear that she believed Brown was at fault. When Caldwell’s son came home that day, he asked, “Is that what’s going to happen to me when I’m 18? If I’m walking down the street, and the police find me, am I gonna die?”
Aisha Wadud, a 36-year-old mother of four from Minneapolis, says she is “very stern with other adults when it comes to [her] children and their care.” She’s a fierce advocate for them the way her mother was for her—Wadud remembers her mother taking on her younger sister’s school after a teacher called her a racial slur, the culmination of a trend of purposefully neglecting black students. “When my child comes to me and tells me something is wrong, I believe my children first,” Wadud says of her own approach to parenting. “And then I take action.”
The mothers who shared their stories with Quartz were clear that not all interactions with their children’s educators have been negative. “There are teachers and staff out here that advocate for our kids when we don’t have the time to do so. As a single mom, I know both sides,” Caldwell says. Alston, the Atlanta mother, is pleased with her children’s schools and appreciates that when she raises concerns, the teachers and administrators take them seriously.
Still, the toll of adversarial interactions with other authority figures in their children’s lives weighs on black parents. Just under half of parents of black children are very satisfied with their children’s schools, compared with 60% of parents overall and 65% of parents of white children. Dissatisfaction and concern over their children’s ability to feel confident and succeed in schools where they might be overlooked or mistreated leads some black parents to seek alternatives to traditional school settings—including schools with Afrocentric curricula or homeschooling.
Since the 2014 incident, Caldwell’s son, now 13, has moved to a majority-black, all-boys school. He also founded a nationwide book club for black boys. Though Caldwell says she did not choose her son’s new school based on its racial composition, she enjoys seeing him surrounded by other boys who look like him. “They have this sense of brotherhood, and I can tell that that’s infinitely helped his education.”
Parenting while black
Black parents who are forced to teach their children how to cope with inequality have to contend with another set of prejudices themselves, including being blamed for their children’s supposed misdeeds. A Google search of “African American parenting” or “Black parenting” returns results on authoritarianism, hostility, and toxic stress. Featured articles blame black parents for preschoolers’ bad behavior, adolescents’ obesity, and teens’ drug use. In the top results, there is nothing to be found about watchful protectiveness. (Much of this is about black mothers—black fathers are often excluded from conversations about parenting because academia and pop culture alike have perpetuated the stereotype that they do not parent, though research shows that black men actually spend more time with their children than men of other racial groups, regardless of whether they live full-time with their kids.)
“They’re seen as bad mothers,” says Barnes. “That’s a historical stereotype: That black women were bad mothers to their own children while at the same time being the women who raised white people [as enslaved caregivers and domestic servants].”
“They’re seen as bad mothers.”
Black mothers’ vigilance and protectiveness long predates the intensive parenting boom in the 1990s. According to Barnes, whose work examines contemporary strategic mothering, black women have been watchful parents since slavery. “The community of enslaved women was charged on their own with ensuring the survival of those children, whether biological or not. And that’s a framework that has lasted throughout the African American experience,” she says.
Reporter Dani McClain agrees. In her account of Black motherhood, We Live for the We, she writes, “Black women have had to inhabit a different understanding of motherhood in order to navigate American life. If we merely accepted the status quo and failed to challenge the forces that have kept black people and women oppressed, then we participated in our own and our children’s destruction.” McClain’s words point to another reality of black motherhood—that raising healthy, happy black children is political. Under slavery and Jim Crow, when racial violence routinely stole black children away, keeping a black family together was an act of rebellion. McClain points out that even today, black mothers are charged with organizing movements while still mourning children lost to shootings by police and vigilantes.
Even so, mainstream narratives of motherhood exclude black women. When the author Neferti Austin began the process of adopting a child, she struggled to find books written by or for black mothers. The resources she found seemed to assume all moms were white and overlooked experiences common to black mothers and mothers-to-be: navigating higher-risk pregnancies, caring for children’s natural hair, explaining and combating systemic racism, or having “the talk” about interacting with police.
Austin decided to publish a book of her own, titled Motherhood So White: A Memoir of Race, Gender, and Parenting in America. Similarly frustrated with the lack of resources for new black mothers, Dani McClain wrote her book on black motherhood, too. Neither is a how-to guide, but both offer a comforting and all-too-rare message to black mothers: you are not alone.
This message is perhaps the oldest strategy black women have employed to sustain themselves and their families. Throughout history, black women have collectively raised communities of children, biologically related and not. These “othermothers,” as black feminist scholar Patricia Hill Collins terms them, provide crucial support to black children and to one another. Together, they face down inequality and seemingly unbeatable odds to ensure their families survive—and thrive. In Barnes’ words, black women have always known, “[Mothering] is not just about raising children… It’s not just about making sure people are alive. It’s also about making sure that their spirits are intact, that their souls are intact, that they are finding joy.”
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