#yeah let’s talk about mental health. huh

[mediumgayitalian]

At around half past one, Nico gets a Feeling.

He gets feelings a lot. Nothing he can quantify, just something telling him that something is up, somethings wrong. Or something’s about to be. At this point, he’s learned to trust his intuition, based purely on the number of times it has saved his life; a number he’s long since given up counting. (He’s only ignored his gut feelings three times in his life: when Bianca went on her quest, when his father promised not to hurt Percy before the Titan War, and when he went looking for the Doors. He has learned his lesson.)

So when something at the bottom of his stomach tells him to get up, to check things out — he does.

He knows it could be nothing. (The last time he had a Feeling, it turned out that he had placed a book precariously on the edge of his desk, and it had been about to fall. Not exactly world-saving stuff.) But regardless, he steps out of bed, shoves his feet into his shoes, and creeps out of his cabin.

Camp is kind of beautiful at night.

There’s an eerie calmness to it without so many human disasters running about, and the quiet reflects that. All Nico can really hear is the hooting of owls in the distance, the chittering of nocturnal animals and monsters alike, the distant screeches of curfew harpies, and the pleasant crashing of the waves. The air is clean, when he inhales, and he takes the time to hold it in his lungs for a bit, imagining the sweet breath is healing his burned lungs, turning the scar tissue back to something flexible and normal. Whether or not it actually works, he doesn’t know, but it feels nice.

Under the light of the brightly shining new moon and billions of stars, he starts his patrol. Around his own cabin first — there’s nothing, as he expected, the warning doesn’t seem overwhelming like threats tend to be — and then he makes his way around the circuit, checking behind gardens and shrines and inside braziers. He hums quietly as he walks, something preppy and bright the Apollo kids have been hollering for days, and waves to Lady Hestia, sword heavy at his waist.

“Come sit,” she calls, patting the seat next to her.

Nico does.

“Haven’t seen you out at night in a while.”

He hums, toneless this time, leaning back on his hands and mirroring her gaze at the sky.

“Been sleeping, for once.”

“I’m glad.”

He smiles, knowing that she means it. He watches out of the corner of his eye as she picks up his sword, sliding it from his belt loop, and uses it to stoke the flames. She doesn’t seem afraid of it, or wary. To her it’s just a stick of metal. It’s nice.

“You have you been, my Lady?”

She pokes at the embers a few more times, scooping a few to balance at the tip of the blade for a while. It glows with the heat, and he knows he’ll have to sharpen it tomorrow, but he doesn’t mind. Maybe he can do it while Will is in the archery range. It’ll give him an excuse to be at the armoury at the same time, anyway.

“I’ve been well.” She breathes deeply, small smile pulling at her face. “It’s calmer, and more people wave to me. I like it.”

“Good.”

She dismisses him a few minutes later, sending him off with a promise to chat again soon. She doesn’t need to worry about him promising — he makes a point to sit with her at least once a week — but it’s nice to know someone wants his company, so he appreciates it. He leaves with a wave, walking towards the eastern half of the cabins.

Nothing’s amiss. He can hear campers snoring, and see the odd reading light. Malcolm catches his eye as he walks past the Athena cabin and winks, sending a cheeky salute when he sees the sword held loosely in his hands. So far, everything seems fine. He’s beginning to think the Feeling might have simply been about Lady Hestia, so he decides to do one last check around the Big House and then head back.

Of course, that’s where the issue is.

The infirmary lights are always on. They’re dimmer in the night, more of a glow than anything, but there’s an extra brightness streaming out from the windows, and when Nico peeks inside, he sees Will, standing with his back turned at the nurse’s station.

He takes a moment to check his strength, making sure he has the energy for it — dinner last night was pho and he had three bowls, he most definitely does — and sinks into the shadows by the door. He materializes back in the little alcove by the bandage & wraps cabinet, lurking silently while he blinks the dizziness away.

The first thing he registers is soft singing.

He’s facing Will, now, and can see the glow coming from his hands, enveloping a bowl of some kind. He has both hands coated in some dusky pink substance, massaging and gently pounding it against the sides of the bowl, working it through with great care. As his voice gets higher, the glow gets brighter, fading as he dips lower. He sings something about hills and meadows and the breeze, about wing-song, about the sound of flower stems bending in the wind. For a while Nico stands, listening to the melodious ancient Greek, swaying with every pitch and hold. It’s captivating.

Will is almost haunting when he heals.

There’s a divinity in him — in all of them — but he glows when he sings. Not just his hands, and sometimes his head if he puts enough power in his words, but there’s an almost shimmer to the air around him, a shining warp. His skin gets clearer, and his hair goes more metallic, almost, like spun gold rather than blonde. His freckles make his skin into an inverse replica of the night sky, dark specks surrounded by bright empty between them. His long fingers pluck through bright strands of light like a harpist strums their chords; lightly, carefully, skillfully; like a braider weaves their hair. There’s an undeniable age to his magic, a practice that’s visibly replicated millions of times over thousands of years, as if every healer who has come before him links their arms with his, breathes their strength in his lungs. Sometimes, when he does something truly unbelievable, amazingly beyond reason, he flickers — his orange camp shirt fades into a white chiton, or long robes, or a white coat, or a blue tunic. Watching him heal is like watching the sunrise — breathtaking and unique, every time, but powerful in its cyclic archaism.

It takes Nico a long time to realise Will is swaying.

Snapped out of his trance, he begins to notice Will’s long, slow blinks, the unsteady way he stands, the weight he has leaned on the counter. Even his face looks plainly exhausted under the glow, face pillow-creased and eyes bruised, hair mussed, limbs leaden. Footsteps as silent as he can manage, Nico creeps over to the schedule posted by the door, scanning through the scrawled pen ink.

He curses quietly. Will is not supposed to be awake.

There are really only three people who can work the infirmary to its fully capacity, barring Chiron. Kayla, Austin, and Will are the only ones who can magically heal, as much as the volunteers are imperative, so when the camp is in full swing one of them must be stationed at all times. That’s how Will sets it up. A bit of a waste of time, he acknowledges, but Nico knows he has memorized every time a camper who should have been saved. He carries far too much guilt to ever let it happen again, as inconvenient as his rules may be.

Night shift, though, is a need-be basis. If the infirmary is as empty as it is right now, then there truly is no need to keep one of the three of them awake outside their circadian rhythm, staring at nothing. Instead, they take shifts in the on-call room — asleep, but prepared should anything go wrong, should a monster chase a new camper at an odd hour. It’s Will’s turn for on-call. It’s two in the morning. He should be asleep.

And, yet.

Nico recognizes the look in his eyes. There’s a — frailty, to them, a deep-seated, animalistic fear, one he recognises from the hours after his own night terrors. A single-minded panic that cannot be unseated in any logical way, cannot be comforted with any gentle hands.

Nico handles his fear with slashing swords and bruised knuckles. Will, he knows, handles his fear with obsessive, endless preparation.

Knowing full well nothing is going to drag him away from his focus bar actual cardiac arrest, Nico walks right by him. Will doesn’t move. He settles behind him in the old, creaky leather office chair, curling his legs under him and resting his head on the soft arm. He watches Will, watches the almost machine-like movement to his kneading arms, and falls back asleep to his humming.

———

“…Nico?”

He wakes up warm and a little cramped, in the same position he fell asleep. Sun is streaming on from the many issues, blocked from burning his eyes by Will’s hunched frame, facing towards him now, hands and shoulders shaking with equal violence.

“What time is it?”

His voice is croaky and wrecked from hours of singing. Nico is willing to bet his throat is burned as badly as his hands, cooked from non-stop, sun-borne glowing. The divinity that had emanated from him before has abandoned him and he looks young, lost.

“Early,” Nico says softly. He unfolds himself from the chair, stretching slightly — gods, he is going to ache today — and wraps a slow, careful hand around Will’s wrists. “Probably around six, if I have to guess.”

“I don’t remember waking up.”

“That’s okay.”

“I’m tired.”

“That’s okay.”

His breathing is heavy, laboured.

“I don’t —”

Nico squeezes gently. “It’s okay, Will.”

Will swallows and says nothing.

“Come on.”

Carefully, letting Will’s stiff joints set the pace, Nico guides him out of the infirmary. The sun shines brighter as soon as he steps outside, but he doesn’t seem to notice bar a tiny, almost imperceptible flinch at the change in lighting. Nico switches from holding his wrists to laying a hand on the small of his back, half-worried he’s going to fall over.

Luckily, he makes it to the Apollo Cabin upright, although the stairs take them a while. The hinges of the old screen door creak as Nico pushes it open, and he sees both Kayla and Austin, up and dressed, jump.

“…Will?” Kayla asks softly, eyebrows creased in concern. She walks over to him when he doesn’t answer, frozen still, placing a gentle hand on his shoulder. “You okay?”

Will leans — almost hesitantly — into the touch. The same blankness from before clouds his eyes, although this time there’s less of the fear.

“Hey.” Nico walks over to stand in front of him, waiting patiently for him to meet his eyes. In the minutes it takes, he hears Austin pad over, standing opposite to Kayla, hands clenching and unclenching like he can’t decide what to do with them. “You think you can sleep?”

Will doesn’t answer verbally, but drifts after a moment to his bed. Nico follows, helping him out of his shoes and shirt. After a beat of hesitation, Austin hurries over, turning down Will’s sheets and helping him crawl in. Soft guitar music begins to play, and when Nico looks over Kayla is fiddling with the CD player, turning the dials carefully. Without much fanfare, Will’s eyes flutter closed, and his breathing slows to something deep and even. His twitching fingers still.

“I don’t think today’s an activity day,” Nico murmurs. “I checked up on him a while after midnight; he’d been at it for hours. He didn’t stop ‘til sunrise.”

Kayla rubs harshly at her eyes. “Fuck.”

“He’ll be okay,” Austin whispers. He runs a gentle knuckle over Will’s forehead, then turns his careful, imploring gaze to Nico. “You kept an eye on him?”

“Yes.”

“Thank you.”

Nico inclines his head. “Had a feeling.”

“I don’t know what to do,” Kayla admits. “He was —” She trails off, staring at something in the left half of the cabin — the empty half. “He was like this after the Titan War, too. I think he spoke maybe two words for the entirety of September.”

Nico almost can’t imagine it. The very thought of it makes something twinge in his chest, clench in his stomach.

“We’ll figure it out.” He nods, to convince himself as much as Kayla and Austin, who look to him with way more trust than he deserves. “We won’t let it — it won’t get that bad. We’ll help, and if we can’t figure it out we’ll get help. It won’t be as hard as last time.”

It won’t be as hard as last time because there won’t be twelve shrouds, Nico doesn’t say, but he doesn’t need to. Both Kayla and Austin nod, looking at their sleeping brother with firm resolution.

“This time, we’ll be there.”

#yeah let’s talk about mental health. huh #pjo #percy jackson and the olympians #hoo #heroes of olympus #pjo hoo toa #nico di angelo #will solace #nico di angelo & will solace #nico di angelo/will solace #solangelo #nico/will #will/nico #kayla knowles #austin lake #will solace & kayla knowles & austin lake #nico di angelo & kayla knowles & austin lake #angst #hurt/comfort #emotional hurt/comfort #depression #depressive episode #catalonia #anxiety #my writing #fic #longpost #mental health issues

[austinsastrology8991]

Uranus and why your life is a ShiT ShoW > URANUS IN Yer HOUSe <

Uranus in the FIrst - You are the most unpredictable little fuck-head that everyone loves. They always change > there clothes, there direction in life > their hair colour. they thrive in change unless you try to change them, they are the ones changing and dont you dare change them, thats all they have left ;( Uranus in the Second. - Crazy self esteem issues. these people think they are the greatest then the worst person, also same applies to their income because they dont think they are worth much, until they invest into bitcoin and think they will be the next warren buffet. honestly the only thing stable about you is the perception of your value changing. But they love change, something to look forward to i guess Uranus in the Third your brain and communication skills are kinda fucky you know that dont you. you always know how to say something shocking, and extremely good at changing the subject of a conversation, like you dont have to say much, but what you do say just made everyone go huh what the fuck you say? its amusing tho we appreciate you Uranus in the F4urth - Emotionally avoidant, dependent, and attached personalities. They cant make their mind up on how they feel, so they experiemnt with every feeling to see if they vibe with that. mum was probably very unpredictable, and they wanna be like her. they just trying their best to forgive her <3 Uranus in the Fifth - Okay this one is the genius. This one people actually think your onto something when your showing off because you break free of every social convention, and archetype, but in the most perfect way. everyone believes your special, and you can change the vibe of a room like dat Uranus in the Sixth - what a fkn mess your life is. I had this one friend who would have 10 different drinks in his room and he would drink each one sparingly (they were all warm too). he had some serious health issues, and lets not get into his mental health okay. but yall have crazy lives and you make it that way Uranus in the Seventh - Im not a player i just fuck a lot. they choose their partners based off how interesting they are, if you can satiate their curiosity you got em. but if your boring or not worth figuring out yeah g-bye. also they just come off strange so everyone is extremely curious. they get projected on a lot but they dont mind its a good way to find out something interesting lol Uranus in the Eighth - Freaks who will do anything.... and im not just talking about sex, if they want something they'll find any way to get it. masters of attainment, even if its probably not healthy for them, they don't care if they want it they get it. then the object of their fixation changes as soon as they do get it. they are like obsessed with 'progress' but its hard to call it that sometimes Uranus in the Ninth - Clever minds who are always skipping segments of a speech, or a video to find the juicy parts. They have very quick minds that are so easily bored, but if you talk to them, they'll never not have something interesting to talk about. also when change does occur its a LOt Uranus in the Tenth - why are yalll like this. just baffling people like they know how to make an entrance and when everyone starts loooking at them, they decide to make fun of everyone by doing something a lil bit too shocking, almosst making fun of you for looking at them. gets off on shocking ya Uranus in the Eleventh - They wanna change the world, but not in a way that is practical. until it is. They have a million friends because they have a knack for understanding people, but when you ask what they want or what scares them. it just makes you rethink why your even friends with them in the first place. 12 - your crazy. and its endearing but everyone is this close to calling the cops on you or locking you up in a psyche ward. maybe tone down your retardation. we all got something going on but you take it to a whole new level.

#astrology #astrology blog #astrology notes #astrology observations #astro community #astrology placements #astrology houses #house placements #uranus aspects #uranus #uranus through the houses

[gatitties]

Hanging out

─ Tenjiku x fem!reader

─ Summary: you have the courage to ask the guys who tried to recruit you to hang out

─ Warnings: swearing, mention of ways to die, kisaki

Part one / Part three / Part four

no because I'm thinking of making a miniseries for these bois because I'm an idiot for them 😭 I think I did it a bit long, sorry-

"Come on honey! It's the first time in a long time that you've been out with friends, or talked to someone, or seemed to have friends, or-

"Mom, you don't need to degrade me anymore, I know I don't have friends."

"But not anymore! That's why you have to go out with them, you can't spend your life locked in your room."

"What are we betting? If it's the family heritage then…" a bump grew on your head from the blow your mother gave you "Okay, okay, I guess I can try to get out of the house."

"That's it! Get out there and shine love, you deserve everything good in the world."

"Even the family herit-?"

You didn't even finish when you already had another bump on top of the previous one, deciding to leave the subject you said goodbye to your mother, well, she had to go with a friend, meanwhile you finished doing some pending things that you had to finish by tomorrow. When you finished, you threw yourself on your bed, flipping through the social networks a bit, doubting whether to contact the boys, after all, you only met them once in person, the rest was all conversations in the group that Izana put you in, although you had a lot of fun with them there, it's not the same to talk on a screen than face to face.

After several minutes you decided to take a brave step, seeing that some of them were even talking on the group chat.

Tenjiku will rule the world

[Matchstick] So i grabbed the bat and left him bleeding in the alley

[Izana] deserved more punishment tbh

[Izana] we can't go easy on traitors

[Sanzu] next time leave it to me

[Sanzu] i won't let them recognize the corpse

[You] is that a new flirting method?

[You] i don't think it's very effective

[Izana] aye

[Izana] glad to see you're on

[Shion] not me

[Kaku] stfu

[Rat] protective boyfriend material huh?

[Kaku] stfu too Rat

[You] yeah leave my baby alone

[Rat] whatever [Rat] can you at least change my name?

[You] nah, i like Rat more than rindou, it suits you better

[Rat2] can you change mine?

[Rat2] i'm supposed to be the oldest

[Rat2] he would have to have the 2 not me

[Mochi] picky boy

[You] okay

You have changed the nickname of Rat2 to Rannabelle

[Rannabelle] …

[Matchstick] pfft-

[Kisaki] i keep asking why you decided to include her in the group

[Kisaki] the rumors were false after all

[Izana] do you have something against the opinion of your superior?

[Matchstick] bro she's funny

[Kisaki] ...

[You] anyway

[You] who tf are you?

[Shion] oh right, they didn't meet in person

[Kisaki] i wouldn't like it either tbh

[Sanzu] speak for you

[You] i already like you Sanzu [You] you're already among the 'handsomes'

[Shion] not that shit again- [Shion] you didn't even see him

[You] i don't need

[Koko] you're just jealous cause you're not in the handsome group [Shion] i'm not jealous [Koko] sure [You] anyway i have something to ask [Matchstick]shoot

[Rat] you want a date with me? aww, of course! [You] yikes [You] i think i prefer a date with a homeless man who can time travel than you

[Kaku] i'm really concerned about your mental health right now [Izana] she's just in her haunting nature [Rannabelle] bet she likes me more than you rin [You] i like hanma better ngl

[Matchstick] bwahahah~ i'm the favourite ♡  [You] no, you're not ♡ 

[Matchstick] </3

[Izana] so... what do u want to ask?

[You] oh right

[You] i was just wondering if you guys had some free time to hang out?

[Izana] sure ;)

[Kaku] i'm in

[Matchstick] of course i have to get to be the favorite~

You didn't pay attention to the other messages, the truth is that Izana and Kakucho were enough for you, you weren't going to belittle Hanma either, he was trying anyway. You just texted a couple more to meet up at a certain place, quickly got ready in the most comfortable clothes you could find, plugged your headphones into your phone to have a walk to the location.

Normally you were like a damn rock when it came to expressing your feelings or opening up to people, you didn't like to socialize much but it wasn't a pain either (depending on the person), the fact that you didn't like to talk or express yourself a lot didn't mean you were one of those people who get nervous when they have to order pizza by phone, call a waiter or order a drink at any bar. But today you had that little nervous feeling, as if these guys were going to judge you and decide if you were worthy or not, even though it was clear that they already liked you a little for the simple fact of adding you to their group chat.

You were pessimistic so you kept those feelings throughout the journey, however, swallow them because as soon as you saw the boys just forgot them, there were three people you didn't know, the rest were Izana, Kakucho, Hanma and the Haitani brothers. You assumed that neither Koko, nor Shion, nor Mochi were there because they had to do something important or simply didn't want to see you.

"Hey honey, here!"

Hanma waved his hand as his eyes met yours, drawing your attention to come closer once and for all, you murmured a greeting to everyone, looking at the three new faces.

"So you don't intend to introduce me to your friends? Oh wait, I want to guess, can I?"

"Go ahead, please give us one of your amazing comparisons."

Rindou said, completely amused, even though you also messed with him, your comparison ability can always make fun of others, it's not like you make distinctions, no one was going to escape your critical eye.

"Mmmh… I don't know why I have the feeling that the one who seems bacterophobic is Sanzu" you pointed to the long-haired boy who had a mask covering half of his face "he seems to have pretty features, and Sanzu is in that side without hesitation."

"Madarame must be tossing and turning in his bed when he heard you, you've got it right."

Sanzu offered you his hand in greeting, noticing how his eyes narrowed a little, he had a cheeky smile that no one could see. The next one you looked at was Mucho, he seemed almost as stoic as you, another rock on the team huh? You also guessed that it was him, then you exchanged glances with the boy with glasses who seemed to be here by force, there was no one else left so he could only be…

"Are you Kisaki? Man, aren't you cute? Are you the baby of the group or something?"

Everyone tried to hold back their laughter when you approached him to ruffle his hair in an affectionate way, more like to annoy him a bit, poor boy, you were taller than him so your action and comment only irritated him more than he already was, he moved away your hands from his head, clicking his tongue.

"Maybe you're taller, but I'm sure I surpass you in age and intelligence."

The others looked at the interaction, you had that dark look that managed to scare away so many fucking thugs, it looked like you wanted to hit him right there, but they didn't expect you to laugh like Izana the time he met you.

"Oh please, don't be silly, I'm older than you, in fact, I think I'm older than all of you."

"You're kidding, aren't you? Most of us here are of legal age and you are still studying."

Izana questioned looking at you, you scratched the back of your neck sighing, you weren't very proud to admit it, but it's not like it was a big deal either.

"Well, I'm nineteen, I repeated a couple of courses…"

"You what!?"

The Haitani brothers were the ones who were most shocked by the new information about you, you just downplayed it, the last thing you wanted right now is to be treated differently because of your age, even if it's only a year older than some, these guys can be very offended at not being the oldest.

Kakucho finished off the general daze, talking about doing something and not just standing there like idiots, so you guys moved around just taking a walk while talking about random nonsense, it went pretty well, at least the guys appreciated some 'healthy' time, since usually their free time was also related to causing chaos in other gangs.

The truth is that it was not as bad as you thought, they all seemed quite funny, Izana and Kakucho managed to drag you into every interesting thing they saw, more like the leader of Tenjiku, Kaku thanked you because he could see his friend behaving like if he were a kid again (although he did threaten the others if they made fun of Iza for being a bit softer).

Hanma and the Haitani brothers tried to irritate or flirt you, you just looked at them with a blank face, completely ignoring them when they brought up the whole 'love' and 'relationships' thing, when they weren't bothering you they were quite nice, but that meant that now you were messing with them, that was your mechanics.

Surprisingly, after a while you and Kisaki 'clicked' simply because Hanma was bothering you both, you looked at each other silently as if you could communicate with your eyes, ignoring the poor boy as you started small talk out of the first thing that came to your mind, of course that didn't stop your little comments about him being smaller than you either.

Sanzu and Mucho stayed more on the sidelines, you didn't complain, they seemed more reserved than the others, or at least less expressive, you understood them perfectly because you were like that most of the time, it's just that these guys ─Izana more than anything─ made you take out to bring out your more sociable side a little more, it was different and nice.

But you knew well that hanging out with a gang would bring trouble, some punks recognized most of the group you were with, how could they not anyway? You were unintentionally involved in a small fight, but you weren't scared either when the fistfights between the teenagers started flying back and forth, you knew it was going to happen at some point so you just watched on the sidelines disinterestedly.

Ironically, Kisaki stayed by your side ─this guy doesn't know how to fight─ because the guys felt threatened by your dark gaze, honestly you were a little scared now, but only when one of the thugs came up to pick a fight with you, you saw yourself in the obligation to use your second wild card.

´"If you get one step closer, I promise that death will be the most beautiful thing you want to wish for, how do you want your body to be found? Ah, better if they don't find it, right?"

They immediately backed away, you're lucky most people find it hard to read your true expression because if they were like Kakucho the first time you met him they would have already beaten you up. But it didn't end there, there was another brave man who came up thinking that despite your threats you would be an easy target, which, well, you were.

Everyone seemed to see just as you were hit square on the cheek, your body seemed to fall in slow motion until you hit the ground, you closed your eyes letting a tired sigh slip past your lips, watching out of the corner of your eye as Kisaki did his best to defend himself against that same guy. You dedicated yourself to looking at the clouds in the sky without even getting up again, as if you were an opossum playing dead, hey, at least that way they wouldn't hit you again.

You only lay there for a long time, you even closed your eyes because you were starting to get bored, the boys only took a few more minutes, all their bodies surrounding you, guilt gnawed at some more than others ─Kakucho was very angry with himself─ but still it remained there.

"Do you think she's dead?"

"That's something very pessimistic, I haven't been able to go on a date with her yet."

Hanma and Ran murmured over the others who kept their questions as to whether you were okay inside, they didn't know if you were that weak or not, if you suffered from some disease or anything that could literally kill you, much to their relief you opened one of your eyes noticing how the sunlight darkened because their figures obscured it.

"It takes something more forceful than a punch to kill someone, unless the person is hit with a more forceful object or has already been seriously injured, statistically it is impossible for someone to die from a punch, well, unless it is a newborn baby."

"Oh never mind, she's perfectly fine."

Everyone sighed with relief, some being more audible than others, Kakucho helped you up, asking your forgiveness for not helping you before they hit you and they decided to go to a store to buy you a cold patch for the bruise that began to form on your cheek.

"Did you really just lie on the ground to wait?"

You hummed affirmatively at Mucho's question, who was waiting with you outside for the others to leave the store, you saw that he tried to hide his small laugh at your stupidity, if he had received that blow he would not have remained impassive, that person would definitely have to have a broken neck.

"We will accompany you home, come on."

"Huh? Izana, I appreciate it, but I'm not five years old."

"We're not taking no for an answer."

"Kakucho, not you too… I'm literally older than you."

“Well, look how we don't give a shit."

You looked at Rindou with a grimace for simply dismissing your words that you didn't need a squad to escort you home, but you couldn't do anything, even Kisaki accompanied you even though he said that he had business elsewhere.

These guys would cut their tongues out before admitting it out loud, but they took a liking to you in no time, and even though these idiots were a year younger than you (most of them) they would start behaving more carefully around you, they're not going to let today's incident happen again because they definitely wanted to spend more time with you.

"Gang members but you're being soft because someone hit a girl you only talk to from a group chat, that's cute."

You closed the door of your house in their faces after saying that, you laughed silently when you heard several shouts about how they weren't being soft and that they weren't cute for that, except for Hanma, he just smiled with his typical smile because you said he was cute, did that mean that he was advancing in his position to be your favorite?

#tokyo revengers #tokyo revengers x reader #tenjiku #tenjiku x reader #kakucho #mochi #sanzu #izana #shion madarame #mucho #kisaki #hanma #x reader #reader insert #fem reader #rin haitani #rindou #ran haitani #ran #haitani

[moonlightspencie]

Help Me Hold on to You

Description: Ted and the reader struggle with balancing mental health and everyday life. (Based on The Archer by Taylor Swift)

Pairing: Ted Lasso x fem!Reader

Warnings: depictions of anxiety and panic

Word Count: 8.9k

A/N: one of my all time favs that i’ve written (and, not to sound conceited, one of my favs in general bc it was super self-indulgent hehe). originally posted on tumblr. then dropped onto ao3. now it’s back on tumblr.

“Hey, Y/N. Whatcha up to?” Ted burst into your shared office, a wide-eyed look on his face.

You shook your head with a smirk, “Just going over the last game, trying to figure out what we can do better next time.”

You paused the video on your laptop, shutting it and looking up to him expectantly. He pulled a chair up next to you, suddenly looking a little nervous.

“I know that look, Ted. What’s wrong?”

He shook his head, plastering on a smile. “Nothing.”

“You wouldn’t have come interrupting me unless you had something you wanted to talk about.”

His face dropped, nodding slowly. “I’m getting kind of sick of you reading me like a book, sweetheart.”

“No, you’re not.”

He chuckled, looking back at you. “Okay, guilty. Uh, I’m not sure how to address this, so I guess I better just come out and say it, huh?”

You nodded back at him, silent, but with a reassuring smile.

He clapped once. “So, uh, nobody really knows about this, but I’ve been dealing with some anxiety lately. I, uh— I don’t really want anyone knowing about it, so if you could…”

“I’ll be quiet as a mouse in a trap.”

He raised a brow. “Morbid.”

“My colloquialisms can’t be as silly and polished as yours, friend.”

He smiled. “Guess not. Don’t really have room in my head for ‘em right now, though.”

You shrugged. “That’s okay. I like you whether or not you’re acting like a landscaper’s favorite machine.”

He paused for a moment, trying to put the pieces together. Then, his face lit up.

“Chipper?”

You simply pointed at him with a wink.

“Nice,” he said with a smile. He looked back down to his hands, smile melting. “So, um, I guess I just wanted you to know. That was the reason I had to leave the game, actually. It wasn’t food poisoning, but it just seems easier to let people believe that, you know? But, anyway. You seem to be good with these kinds of things, and I just… I don’t know.”

“Sometimes it’s nice just to tell someone, yeah?”

He nodded with a small grin. “Rebecca’s seen it happen once, but I think that’s about it. I made an appointment to speak with the doc, but I just couldn’t.”

“Why not?”

He shrugged, head shaking. “It’s bull.”

“Ted, you remember what you told me when I talked to you about my issues with trust?”

He raised a brow. “I told you nobody good would hurt you like…”

“You told me that all people are different people. You’ve said it a few times around me, I know you’ve told other people the same. And you know what?”

“What?” His brows sat raised.

“You need to start taking your own advice.”

“I don’t like when you do that.”

“Do what?” You laughed.

He chuckled with you. “When you’re right. I’m not supposed to be a quitter, either.”

“Not for the good things, anyway, huh?”

He nodded. “Thank you.”

He started standing, but you stood with him before he could go anywhere.

“Hey, there’s something I want you to know, too.”

“Shoot,” he said, gesturing for you to continue.

“I deal with anxiety, too. A lot, actually.”

He furrowed his brow. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Didn’t want you to worry.”

“Well, now I am.”

“Don’t. I can cope, I just— I want you to know you’re not alone in this, okay? I get panic attacks, anxiety attacks, I deal with more minor symptoms pretty much every day. And you know what? It doesn’t make me any less of a person. Doesn’t make you, either.”

You saw the tears that began to prick his eyes, but decided to leave that situation alone. Instead, you pulled him in for a hug. He hugged back hard, burying his face in the crook of your neck. You heard him take a few shaky breaths before he pulled back, wiping at his eyes.

“I’m sorry…”

“Don’t ever apologize for vulnerability. Least not to me, cause I know exactly how you’re feeling and it’s okay. I promise,” you reached for his hand, giving it a squeeze.

He smiled at you, trying to hold back from letting any more tears fall.

“Thank you.”

“It’s nothing, Ted. I do want you to try going back to doctor Sharon, though. She’s a good woman.”

He nodded, glancing at where your hand still held his own. He squeezed it again, then left you to get back to your work. You sat for a while, unable to focus on anything but what he’d told you. You hoped like hell he had really listened to you.

It wasn’t until the next day that you’d found he’d both listened to and simultaneously completely ignored you. You were walking down the hall from the office when you saw him.

“Hey,” you called out to him, both hands on his chest to stop him from moving when you got close enough. “Your appointment is supposed to be right now. What happened to—”

“I can’t do it.”

He grabbed one of your wrists, trying to move you. You refused to budge.

“No. Uh-uh. Why did you leave?”

“I’m not talking to someone who’s only there cause she’s paid.”

You raised a brow. “Excuse me, Lasso. Are you not getting paid to do your job?”

He huffed out a sigh.

“Don’t you get attitude with me,” you dropped your hands, but didn’t move from where you stood. “I gotta go, but you’re trying again tomorrow, you hear me?”

“Y/N—”

“You’re going. Non-negotiable.”

He dropped his shoulders. “Fine. I’ll try.”

You nodded once, a smile of victory on your face. “And by the way, I think Keeley’s smoking in the boot room. Might wanna see what that’s about, yeah?”

He tilted his head, a chuckle leaving him. You patted him on the shoulder as you passed to leave the building.

Your day from then on was a long one. You were running around with Beard for part of it, trying to work on strategy for the upcoming game against Man City. The whole Richmond team was on edge, and you were beginning to worry that the nervousness alone might end up being the end-all to the game. You were a firm believer that winning had as much to do with the power of the mind as the power of the body. If they were going in thinking they were going to lose— lose they would.

“That’s a little dramatic,” Beard said over his beer.

You rolled your eyes, sipping at your drink.

“It’s not. Same line of thinking as Ted’s ‘Believe’ sign. I’m just being a little more explicit about what I mean when I say it.”

He chuckled. “You two are more alike than I think you even realize, you know?”

“I think I realize.”

“Do you?”

You shrugged, nodding slightly.

“Both crazy about this team, and even more crazy about you,” you teased, flicking at the brim of his hat.

He hid a smile behind his glass. “Your never-ending optimism and knack for flattery is also pretty similar.”

You hummed in agreement. “Can’t argue with ya, there.”

“So, what do you think we should do, then?”

You shrugged. “Find some way to cheer up the team. Get them excited for the game rather than scared of losing.”

He nodded, brows raised. “Any way of implementing that?”

“I’ll figure it out, I’m sure.” You leaned back. “Remember that game against Kansas State? Our boys were so freaked about it all, then Ted did his thing and got them so excited to play…”

“Beat their asses.”

“Yeah, we did.”

You both went in for a quick high five before continuing.

“Remember how he did it?”

“Told ‘em they needed to loosen up. We had a dance party and ordered pizza.”

You smiled. “Yep. What do you say we make something like that happen again? Day before we travel, let’s do it.”

He smirked, a brow raised. “Sounds perfect. You gonna tell Ted?”

You shrugged. “I think he could use the surprise just as much as the players.”

He narrowed his eyes at you.

You put your hands up. “What’s that look about?”

He just shook his head silently.

“I’m not treating him any different.”

He raised a brow, sipping at his drink again.

“Ted’s been going through it lately, I just think he needs a little cheer up. Nothing else.”

He set down his drink, then sat up straight, eyes still trained on you.

“Quit lecturing me, Beard,” you chuckled. “I know you always think I have some thing for him, but why can’t it just be that I care about people, huh?”

“I see through it.”

You paused for a moment. “I hate that.”

He smirked, and you both finished eating.

You went home yourself, denying a walk-back from Beard. You appreciated the gesture, but the air was beginning to feel thick and suffocating. The last thing you wanted was for him to see you like that.

As much as you tried pretending like the state of the team wasn’t affecting you, you knew that trying to be the fixer for this situation was weighing on you. More than you thought it would.

You tried swallowing, feeling your throat pretending to swell just to spite you. You rushed even faster towards your flat, feeling that the oncoming attack wasn’t going to be so routine.

As soon as you were in your door, your knees hit the floor, head between your arms on the carpet. You tried to control your breathing, but it was no use. Tears fell, though you’d hardly noticed as you’d refused to open your eyes. The bleariness you were bound to find if you opened them would only make the situation worse. You began to worry about passing out if you couldn’t control your breathing, and decided to roll yourself onto your side, whole body pushing through tremors you hadn’t felt in a few months, at least.

The ringing of your phone didn’t aid your situation. You desperately hoped it wasn’t an emergency, because there was no way you’d be able to make it over to where you’d dropped your purse. But, it kept ringing. Four separate calls over the span of probably half an hour.

It was another good half an hour after the calls had stopped before you were composed enough to open your eyes, and pull yourself into a sitting position on the ground. Though, you wouldn’t have known. Time never seemed to make any sense in those situations.

You worked on breathing in and out slowly, wiping away at any remaining tears. The shaking hadn’t yet ceased, but at least that was manageable. Right as you started trying to stand, you heard the loud buzzing of someone asking to be let in. You made it over, asking who was there.

“It’s me. Are you okay?” Ted’s voice came through.

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m fine. Hang on,” you said, letting him in.

It wasn’t long before a knock was at the door, and you wished he wasn’t so quick. No amount of post-panic-primping in a fifteen-second slot could make you look presentable enough to get past him. You opened the door, putting on a smile and hoping he would be too preoccupied with something else to look directly at you for too long.

His face dropped the second he saw you, of course.

“What’s wrong?”

You shook your head. “I’m okay.”

He walked in, leaving you to close the door and follow him.

“No way, McConaughey. You can’t hide tears from me, I got eagle eyes for that sort of thing.”

You crossed your arms. “I’ve just had a long night.”

He watched you for a moment, picking up on the fact that you wouldn’t be sharing any time soon. He nodded slowly.

“Okay, that’s fine. If you don’t want to talk right now, that’s okay,” he smiled softly, then wrapped you in a tight hug.

You welcomed it, arms wrapping around his middle, head buried in his chest.

“You were honest with me,” you started after a moment, “so, I guess I should be with you. I just came down from a pretty bad panic attack. I couldn’t breathe, hardly made it home… I just—”

“It’s okay,” he said, rubbing your back as he spoke. “We don’t have to talk about details. Thank you for telling me.”

You nodded. “Thank you for coming.”

“You always answer when I call. I knew something had to be up.”

“What if I was just in the shower?”

“You still always call me back right away. I had over an hour of radio silence from you.”

You chuckled. “I didn’t know you had it down to such a science.”

He laughed back, pulling away from you just enough to see your face.

“There she is,” he said, a smile on his face.

“And she is a mess.”

“We all get a little messy sometimes, though, don’t we?”

You nodded. “Gotta agree with that.”

He looked at you for a moment or two with a soft smile on his face, and as much as you didn’t want to admit it, especially since Beard was also on your ass about it, that was the moment you knew. You felt your heart rate pick up, and didn’t know what to do but escape. You stepped back, leaving him looking a little confused.

“I think I need some sleep, Ted.”

His eyes were wide, looking at you. “You sure you’re okay?”

“I’ll be fine. I just need time alone, now. I need rest.”

“Okay, yeah,” he nodded, shoving his hands in his pockets. “Uh, alright, well I will see you tomorrow bright and early, right?”

You nodded, giving him a quick smile.

“Anything else I can do for you?”

You shook your head. “No. I’m okay.”

He nodded again, watching you with those big, worried eyes. You wished he would stop with that. He waved a quick goodbye, leaving you alone.

You settled into bed, though you were unable to sleep. You couldn’t stop thinking about the team. Or Ted. Or the fact that you couldn’t help but self-sabotage any chance you got. You wiped away a few stray tears, and closed your eyes, hoping sleep would take over soon.

You woke up from a couple hours of sleep to a text. Of course, from Ted.

- Excited to see you today for coaches meeting :) I’m proud of you

You sighed, setting your phone down next to you. The guy didn’t seem to have a single mean bone in his body, and here you were wallowing in the fact that you couldn’t help but feel like you brought down everyone around you. As much as you tried to remain positive in every situation, you knew your mood affected the people around you whenever you were a little down in the dumps. You got up, hoping you could at least try to disguise it as well as possible for the day. At least for the morning.

You stopped to get coffee on the way in, delivering each drink with a smile. You sat next to Ted to watch the tapes, giving him the most convincing smile you could.

“You seem better today,” he said quietly, a smile on his face.

You nodded. “Yeah.”

The next few days you were preoccupied with setting up the party for the team, and luckily it kept you busy enough to not fall back into the hole you’d had to crawl out of. If there was one thing you were proud of, it was your ability to pull yourself out of the hardest places. Maybe it wasn’t always through the best methods, but you figured that doing what you needed to was working just fine. If it ain’t broke, after all.

“Howdy, howdy!” Ted chimed, walking in.

You shut your laptop quickly, still taking pride in the fact that you were successfully keeping the event from him.

He quirked a brow, nodding towards your laptop. “What’s that about?”

“Nothing you need to worry about right now. What’s up?”

He rubbed his hands together, leaning against your desk with a cheesy grin.

“Guess.”

“You got another jar of barbecue sauce?”

He laughed. “Yes, actually, but that’s not what this is all about, buttercup. It’s about you.”

You furrowed your brow. “What?”

“Well, kinda,” he said with a light chuckle. “I’ve been seeing the doc a lot more frequently, now.”

You lit up. “Oh, I’m so proud of you!”

“You’ll be even more proud in a second. Get this, she actually said that she’s glad me and you are friends.”

You crinkled your nose, laughing. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I told her about all of your help over the past few sessions, and she told me to tell you, little lady, that I am lucky to have you.”

He nudged your shoulder as he ended the sentence, and you hoped he wouldn’t notice how you tried hiding a smile.

You felt heat rise to your cheeks as he finished out by saying, “I gotta say, I agree with her.”

“In that case, you’re welcome.”

He smiled again, hopping up to sit on your desk. “So, what are you up to?”

“You’ll find out later. Later today, actually.”

He raised his brows. “Oh yeah?”

You nodded, “Mhm. I really think you’re gonna love it, too.”

He gasped, “Did you get me those funky shoes from Gucci I showed you the other day?”

“What?” You scrunched up your face. “No, of course not. Those things were horrible.”

He paused, as if to say something, before raising his brows and nodding in agreement.

“Okay, so what is it?”

“Wouldn’t be much of a surprise if I told you, would it?”

He dropped his shoulders. “Aw, come on. Telling me you have a surprise and not saying what it is… That’s worse than telling your dog you’re going on a walk then leaving him home.”

“No, it isn’t.”

“You’re right, that’s just evil. But you know I like to know things.”

You reached over, patting his knee. “I know, but I think you can survive til after practice.”

“Training,” he corrected.

“Ted, we’re both American. You don’t need to adjust your language with me.”

“See, that’s why I love talking to you,” he laughed, poking at your shoulder.

You shook your head, “Okay, now get out of here so I can finish up.”

“I’ll see you at practice, huh?” He raised an eyebrow, looking a little too pleased with himself for switching up his terminology.

You laughed. “See you there, coach.”

Beard walked in a while later, looking at you expectantly.

“Yes, I’m almost ready. Pizza will be here about ten minutes before we’re done, so I’ll excuse myself a little early, and I’ve got Keeley and Higgins doing some decorating in the locker room while we’re out.”

“You know my favorite thing about you?” He asked as he sat down in his seat.

“Fact that you don’t have to actually say anything to talk to me?”

He smirked, nodding. “Exactly.”

You both laughed, then sat back and waited for the boys to make it to the locker room. Ted came in, a big smile on his face as he did.

“Hey, there are two of my favorite people on this whole planet!”

“Still not telling you,” you said, giving a glance at Beard.

He only shook his head, going back to his book.

“Hey!” Ted exclaimed, pointing to Beard. “You know, too?”

“Know what?” Nate asked as he walked in.

You kept talking, “Keeley and Higgins, too. Oh, and Rebecca, actually, but she can’t be a part of it today.”

Ted glared at you as he went to his desk chair, Roy coming in behind him as he did.

“You talking about what Keeley told me she can’t tell me about?”

“Yep,” you responded, leaning back in your seat.

He grunted in response, arms crossing over his chest. You all worked on the game plan for ‘training’, then headed out with the team to get started on the last home practice before the big game. You knew nerves were high the whole time, and were all the more focused on making sure your little pizza party was a relief for everyone. You excused yourself to bring in the pizzas with your two accomplices, and then waited outside the door until the team came barging in. You heard shouts of approval from them all as they saw the decor and food, smiling as the work you’d done was starting to prove to be a good idea. Beard and Ted wandered in a moment after the last boy was in the locker room, a smile on Ted’s face as he heard them all.

“This the surprise?” He asked as he approached you.

You smiled, nodding. Beard moved past you to enter.

“Remember Kansas State?”

He raised his brows, smile only growing. “You didn’t.”

You nodded once more. “I did.”

He scooped you up in a hug, spinning you around.

“You are the best,” he said, setting you back down with a kiss to your cheek. Luckily, the smile on your face could easily be chalked up to the surprise paying off rather than the show of intimacy from your friend. “Well, come on, let’s shake a leg so I can shake some booty.”

You laughed at that, following behind him into the chaos.

“Hey!” He called out to everyone. “Y’all say thank you to Y/N for all this.”

A chorus of ‘thank you’s erupted, and you laughed as Ted pulled you into his side.

“Couldn’t have done it without Keeley and Higgins, y’all. They did all the decorating, I just recycled an old idea of coach, here.”

The team chuckled, then went back to celebrating as the music started.

He looked to you, eyes narrowed. “You’re being way too modest. This happened cause you put your heart and soul into this team.”

“I learned from the best, Lasso.”

He looked at you quietly, a small smile on his face, then shook his head. He pulled you into the small crowd, and you all spent the next couple hours letting loose before you had to check in with reality again.

The party seemed to have helped. Morale was up as you prepared for the game, and at minimum you knew that even if you still lost, they likely wouldn’t take it quite as hard. That helped your conscience, if anything.

One more thing that took a weight off of your shoulders was what happened before the game even started. Ted told the other coaches about his struggles with anxiety before the game. He came clean about it all, and you knew he felt good about finally letting it go to them. As the others started walking out, you held him back, making sure he knew just how proud of him you were.

“I wish I had your confidence.”

He patted your back. “But, you also love your privacy. That’s okay, you know? You also do a much better job holding it down than I do when it comes to this type of thing.”

You swallowed. “I’m not so sure about that. I know how to cope the best way I can, but I think it’s much more brave that you decided to open up to them about this.”

“Hey, don’t be hard on yourself about this,” he said, a hand on your shoulder. “Besides, I’m only doing okay right now cause I’m seeing the doc so often.”

“You saying I need to see someone about this?”

He shook his head. “No. You helped me realize that, for me, going to see her was what I needed. I hope in some way I can help you realize that you should do whatever is best for you. We’re all different people with different experiences, right?”

“Right. Thanks, Ted.”

You sighed. Leaning into his side for a moment, then broke away, clapping once.

“Okay, now let’s go win this.”

The game was lost, but everyone moved past it. You knew most of that was because of Ted and his affection for the goldfish attitude, though he tried like anything to convince you they wouldn’t be feeling so okay if it wasn’t for the little morale boost you’d given everyone before it all started.

He’d also inadvertently managed to convince you to see Dr. Fieldstone.

You knocked on her door, and she looked up from her seat to see you staring at her with a smile from the doorway.

“Come on in, coach,” she said, gesturing at the chair in front of her.

You nodded, looking around the room as you sat. You noted the little bird next to you, tapping it just enough to get it going.

“I like your decorations,” you said with a smile, then looked back at her. “Also, please call me Y/N. I hardly let the boys get away with calling me coach outside of games.”

She smiled. “I see.”

“So, uh, it’s good to finally talk with you. I know we’ve seen one another in passing a few times, but I’ve been exceptionally busy lately or else I would have come and given a proper hello. I really appreciate all of the work you’ve been doing with the team. You seem like a very kind, compassionate woman. I’m happy to have you here, honestly.”

She just watched as you talked, a light grin on her face as you did, though most of the humor rested in her eyes.

You paused for just a moment, though when she didn’t speak up, you took it as an invitation to keep going.

“Uh, so, I’m not really sure how this goes. I’ve only been to see a therapist once before and it didn’t go great. Though, I promise I won’t hold it against you. I’ve just learned how to cope on my own after that experience, but Ted kind of convinced me to try to find what would work best for me moving forward, and I thought—”

“I see why you two are so close,” she chuckled. “I feel as though I know you already.”

Your brows raised. “Really? How so?”

“Well, between how talkative you’ve become now that you’re nervous, and the fact that I’ve heard quite a lot about you in general, I’d say I have an idea of who you are.”

You let out a quick laugh. “Gosh, I’m sorry. I get kind of chatterbox-y when I talk to someone new.”

“Or when you get nervous, yeah?”

You nodded slowly, looking down for a moment. “Yeah. That, too. Guess it kinda goes hand-in-hand with some of my anxiety business, huh?”

She shrugged, though gave you a look that implied she’d agreed with your statement. You smirked, as did she.

“You said you’ve seen a therapist once before?”

You nodded. “Yes, but it didn’t seem to help. They hardly listened to me, and then told me that maybe exercising and breathing exercises would help. Gave me that advice four sessions in a row without really ever caring to know why I was dealing with panic and anxiety and everything else.”

She raised a brow. “I’m sorry you had to experience that. Now, I know you might not be able to trust me—”

“Oh, no. I totally trust you, Doc. I’ve seen how great you’ve been with the team, and I learned from a good friend a long time ago that everyone has a different story. You don’t deserve to be compared like that.”

Her brows really shot up with that being said. She nodded slowly, writing something down as she did.

“Well, thank you for that. That was kind of you to say.”

You smiled at her. “I appreciate you. Really.”

“This need to reassure the people around you, do you think that might have anything to do with what you’re struggling with?”

Your eyes widened, almost shocked at the statement. You understood now how she’d made so much progress with Ted. You continued talking about what you needed to, but the session was coming to a close quickly.

“Uh, one more thing, doc?”

“Yes, Y/N?”

“Thanks for what you said about me to Ted.”

She quirked a brow. “And what was that?”

“You told him I was good for him.”

“You are,” she said, nodding. “I think the both of you need to be reminded that you don’t always have to turn on the personality for someone to love you. I think you do that well. Both of you.”

You chuckled. “You… Are one wise woman, Dr. Sharon.”

She laughed. “I am pretty great at my job.”

“Well, thank you again,” you said, starting to walk towards the door.

“Y/N,” she called out, and you turned. “Try to remember that the whole world isn’t on your shoulders, yeah? You believe everyone deserves to know love and comfort, but you are one of those people, too.”

You nodded, taking in a deep breath, then said your goodbyes. You pulled out your phone as you left her office. Being the last appointment for the day, you knew most people had already gone home, but you felt like getting some food. You dialed Ted’s number and waited expectantly, heading towards the door.

He answered, but didn’t speak.

You furrowed your brow, exiting the building.

“Ted?” You asked, waiting for a reply.

His voice came through, shaky and nervous-sounding. “Hey, what’s up?”

“Whoa, hold on, what’s up with you?”

“I— I’m kind of…” he trailed off, taking in a hard breath.

“Are you at home?”

You started walking more quickly, heading towards his flat.

“Yeah.”

“I’m coming to you, okay?”

You heard a sniffle on the other end, and a weak ‘okay’ in response. You hung up, and practically ran the rest of the way there. He buzzed you in, and you were up the stairs, bursting into his apartment in no time. He was sitting on his couch in his undershirt and khakis, clearly having been in the middle of undressing when he got hit with whatever ailed him.

You rushed over to the couch, standing next to him. He looked up at you, still crying.

“Do you want to talk about it?” You asked softly, reaching over to touch his arm.

He shook his head. “Not yet.”

“Can I hug you?”

He nodded quickly, standing up and clinging to you like a child. You held him, hands rubbing up and down his back as he cried, head shaking every so often, disagreeing with the thoughts in his own head.

“I can’t even…” he trailed, mumbling against your shoulder.

“What is it, hun?” You asked, still trying to calm him as much as possible.

“Am I a shitty dad? I don’t—”

“No, no. Of course you aren’t.”

“I can’t even pick up my son from a sleepover. He had a nightmare and wanted to go home and I couldn’t be there for him,” he turned his head, cheek against your shoulder now.

You reached up to run your nails through his hair. “You’re like the best dad I could think of. Even thousands of miles apart, you spend more time talking to your kid than I ever got with my dad in the same house. He knows you love him.”

“I quit on his mom. I’m not supposed to be a quitter.”

“You didn’t quit. You didn’t forfeit. Game time was up, the match was over. Nothing you could do at that point, Ted.”

He sniffled, then nodded. “You really think so?”

“You were both fighting so long for something that only hurt the both of you. It was coming to an end naturally. You just finally had the strength to let it end, even though it was hard.”

He nodded again, and fell silent for a few minutes, still holding on to you for dear life.

“Ted?” You asked.

He hummed in question.

“Can I get you some water? I don’t want you to get dehydrated.”

“Yeah,” he said, then let you go, sitting back on the couch.

You filled up a glass from the tap, handing it to him and kneeling in front of him. He drank some, then handed the glass back to you to set down on the coffee table.

“Good, thank you for drinking some,” you smiled.

He laughed humorlessly. “I’m a child.”

“You just need to be cared for a little bit right now. I know stuff like this is all new to you still, I don’t think being comforted and coddled a little is gonna hurt all that much.”

He smirked. “I guess not. Thank you. For coming here.”

You stood, going to sit next to him.

“It’s nothing. You’d do the same for me. Heck, you kind of have already, you just didn’t have to witness the crying part.”

He chuckled. “That’s… Embarrassing. I’m sorry.”

“It’s not embarrassing at all,” you said, then leaned back into the cushions. “You feel like food?”

“I don’t know if going out right now—”

“I was going to order in. Thought we could watch tv or a movie or something and hang out for a while.”

He looked to you with a soft smile, nodding.

“Yeah, I’d like that.”

The next day, you woke up feeling better than you had in a while. You felt well rested, and even went to pick up coffee for everyone despite it not being a film-watching day. You made your way to the office, though you found it much more somber than you were expecting.

“Whoa,” you started as everyone watched you walk in with the tray of drinks. “Who died?”

Apparently that was a poorly timed question.

You showed up at the funeral, heading right to Rebecca for a hug.

“Hi, love,” you said, squeezing her a little tighter than normal. “You okay?”

She nodded. “I’m alright.”

You pulled back, giving her a smile. “For what it’s worth, you look hot.”

She laughed, “Charming as always, my friend.”

“It’s what I do best.”

You heard the squeal of Keeley before you saw her.

“You look gorgeous!” She said as she hugged you.

“Babe, it’s a funeral.”

“Still look hot,” she said with a grin before moving on to Rebecca.

You gave a quick hello to Roy.

“She’s… Weird about funerals.”

You nodded. “Right. Well, I’ll be back. Ted was supposed to be here before me and isn’t picking up his phone now.”

Roy furrowed his brow. “Really? I’m shocked you didn’t come together.”

You tilted your head. “Why would we?”

“You realize how fuckin’ obvious you are?”

Your face dropped. “Nothing’s happening, Roy.”

He grunted with a shake of his head, and you headed off away from people to try giving Ted another call.

Still no answer.

When it hit his answering machine, you decided to leave it and send a text instead.

- hey, are you okay? i’m at the funeral now. if you show up, i’ll be in the back row waiting for you. if not, i’m coming to you as soon as we’re out of here

You shoved your phone back into your purse, making sure to leave it on vibrate in case he called back. Getting through the day was already hard, and you knew your anxiety was likely going to be more of a when-than-if kind of situation. It only built with the fact that Ted wasn’t getting back to you. You felt like everything was dragging on forever, and it wasn’t until Rebecca was struggling to find the right words in her eulogy that he came in. He sat next to you, squeezing your knee lightly to reassure you as he did, and you gave him a soft smile. Something was off, but even then he had the ability to comfort Rebecca all the way from the back row, continuing to sing the song she’d begun. And, of course, everyone else couldn’t help but join in.

You walked with him to the repast, and took that as an opportunity to ask him about what was going on.

“Ted?”

“Yeah?”

You fell quiet for a moment, unsure of where to start. He started for you.

“If you’re wondering, it was anxiety again. I’m sorry I didn’t respond…”

“Did you at least reach out to Dr. Sharon?”

“Yes.”

You smiled at him. “Okay, I’m glad. Proud of you.”

He smirked, then looked around the neighborhood for a moment.

“Uh, we talked about my dad.”

Your eyes widened. He’d hardly ever talked to you about what happened because he could never get through without crying.

“Wow. Are you okay? I know that’s always really hard for you…”

“She helped me see the good in him again, you know? I was always so angry with him for leaving us, but he did more than leave us. He was…” He trailed off with a shaky breath. You reached over, taking his hand, and he held onto yours firmly. “He was a great dad. She helped me remember that.”

“I’m happy you could talk to her about it, Ted. Seriously.”

He nodded, one hand going up to wipe at his eyes. “I guess it just hit me thinking about today…”

“I know. I’ve been pretty on edge today, too.”

“Are you okay?” He rushed out, looking at you.

You nodded with a smile, “Much better now that I know you are.”

He squeezed your hand, lacing his fingers with yours. You tried to stave off the sick feeling in your stomach telling you to run the other way. You wished you could just enjoy a nice moment with him, but you couldn’t help but feel guilty somehow. He was too good for most people, and you considered yourself one of the ones he was too good for. You let it happen for a few seconds longer before you pulled away, pretending like you needed to check your phone in your purse.

“Get a message?” He asked after a moment.

“Uh, I thought I felt it vibrate. Guess not,” you chuckled a little.

He nodded quietly, shoving hands back in his coat pockets. You walked silently side by side until you reached the house, walking inside and beginning to mingle with some of the other guests there. You felt anxiety building, but tried putting it off. You couldn’t tell why it was getting worse and worse, but it was. Your pulse kept speeding no matter how easy you tried taking it.

But, you knew it was about to get way worse when you were suddenly being pulled away from Ted by Beard as a woman approached him. He watched after you with eyes wide for a moment before he turned to her, and you furrowed your brow at Beard when he deposited you in a different room.

“The hell was that about?” You snapped.

Immediately, you knew you needed to get away. It was hard enough feeling anxious, but the last thing you wanted was for your feelings to manifest as anger. But, manifest they did.

“You said you didn’t feel anything for him like that,” he said, testing you.

You scoffed. “Now is not the time, Beard. Who was that, anyways?”

“Remember the name, ‘Sassy’?”

Your stomach dropped, and you could swear the air had just gotten thinner.

“Seriously?”

He shrugged, a little smug. You let out a hard breath, beginning to walk away.

“You said—”

You whipped around. “Cut the shit, Beard. It’s none of your business.”

Eyes fell on you, and the barely contained attack was coming into swing. You started walking towards the back door and into the fresh air, hoping you could contain it all until you could get out of there and go home.

The door opened only a moment later, and you turned to find Beard staring at you.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have snapped like that, I just—”

“You have feelings for him. I know you do.” He shrugged, coming to stand next to you. “What I don’t know is what’s wrong besides that.”

“I’m fine.”

“You’re shaking.”

You looked down to see your hands shaking hard as you grasped your arms.

“I—,” you felt tears prick your eyes, and looked away. “I can’t fucking tell him. I’ve known him for years, do you have any clue how shitty it’d be to drop something like that on him? Besides, clearly he’s having fun with…”

You stopped, unable to even say another person’s name.

“The doc told me I self-sabotage, but I don’t think this is that. Is it wrong to want him to be happy? I don’t think I’m the bad guy for that.”

“Nobody said you were.”

“Nobody needs to. I’m a fucking mess. I have no right being upset that he’s happy. I’m a piece of shit,” you whispered at the end, closing your eyes. “I— I need to get out of here. I gotta go, I’m sorry.”

You felt your chest heave, trying to get in air through the invisible smoke that surrounded your head. There was no escaping it, now.

Beard reached out for you, but you already started leaving. He called your name, but you couldn’t handle facing him.

“If anyone asks, please just say I got sick,” you said, back still turned to him.

He sighed, watching as you walked away, holding onto yourself as if you might crumble otherwise. He was worried you actually would, but knew you’d only get more pissed if he tried following you now.

You stumbled along the street, not really sure where you planned on ending up. The closest location was on Nelson Road, so that’s where you found yourself after it all, sinking onto the floor of the office and letting all hell break loose. It was bad enough with how you’d been feeling today, but coupling it all with how ridiculous you felt over being angry that someone else had his attention… That was the thing that nearly pushed you over the edge. Crying and shaking led to dry heaving, dry heaving led to darn near passing out, and that all led to sitting on the ground for who knows how long. You’d always been able to pull yourself out eventually, but you weren’t sure you’d be able to this time.

If people really believed that hope kills, you wished they never had to know what being completely hopeless felt like.

Pretending like you weren’t ever affected by the things that hurt you could only get you so far, and now you were feeling the hard edge of realization that being hit by the things that pained you all at once was so much worse than dealing with it little by little.

Now, a room full of people had seen you crack, too. They all saw through it. The jig was up in a small way that felt huge. Your cover-up act was all you had sometimes, and you couldn’t afford to lose it all because you couldn’t handle seeing Ted with another person, or deal with your emotions before they blew up in your face.

You sobbed, unsure of how you were still awake with how much air escaped you and how little you were taking in. You almost wished you would just pass out for a few hours. Just to escape for a moment.

You heard footsteps fall heavy and quickly down the ball, and it only worsened your panic. The last thing you wanted was for anyone to see you like this, but you couldn’t bring yourself to move. You were cemented to the ground, a crying, shaky mess.

“Oh, thank goodness,” you heard a voice that sounded far away, then felt a pair of arms scoop you up and hold you tightly against them. “I’ve been looking everywhere for you.”

You couldn’t stop yourself this time, and just let yourself cry. Ted tried moving your hands away from your face, but you refused to budge.

“Sweetpea, I need to know you’re okay. Can you breathe with me?”

His voice was more clear now, and you heard a tone in it you almost never did.

“Please,” he whispered, and now you knew why he sounded different.

Tears fell against your bare legs, and they weren’t your own.

“Breathe with me, come on,” he coaxed, and you tried your hardest to obey his request.

Once your breathing calmed, you were able to move your hands, though you refused to look up. He pulled you into his lap from where he sat next to you, hands holding you tighter than they ever had before.

“You really scared me,” he said, quiet.

You took in another breath, face against his neck.

“I’m sorry, you shouldn’t be here.”

“What?” He asked, hands gripping you a little tighter. “What do you mean?”

You shook your head. “I’m a mess. You’re supposed to be out having fun.”

He was quiet for a moment before he spoke.

“Why did you…” He huffed out a breath. “I ran to your apartment. Then all your favorite restaurants. I went down all the streets I thought you might have taken, and finally I ended up here. I didn’t know where else to look.”

“Why were you looking?”

“I asked Beard where you were and he said you got sick. You were already not doing so hot, and I knew that was a lie”

“You have better things to be doing right now, Ted.”

“Nothing is more important than being here right now. Nothing. Do you understand me?”

He was taking a harsher tone with you than you were used to. You took a chance and looked up at him to find him in disarray. His tie and jacket were discarded, and his hair was kind of a mess.

“Don’t ever do that again. Please. At least tell someone where you’re going.”

You nodded, taking in the deep worry lines in his face.

“I’m sorry,” you whispered.

“Don’t apologize for that, I just— I was scared.”

You swallowed. “I’m— I’ll be fine. Why don’t you go see your lady friend now.”

He furrowed his brow. “What?”

“I know Beard pulled us away from you two for a reason, Ted. You deserve to be happy. Please don’t let me get in the way of that.”

He raised his brows. “You’re not in the way of anything.”

“Yes, I am.”

“No. You’re not,” he shook his head. “Do you want to know something?”

You sniffed. “What?”

He stroked your cheek with his thumb, then smiled. “She’s kinda pissed at me anyway.”

“Why?”

He took a moment to lean back against the wall, readjusting you in his lap and wrapping his arms around you so that you wouldn’t be able to scoot away. He chewed at his lip for a moment, then looked at you. You stared back, eyes wide, and mascara running all down your face. He couldn’t help but chuckle at the sight.

Hard as you tried not to, you laughed with him.

“What?”

“Your makeup ran harder than anyone on the team.”

You tried wiping away at it, but he grabbed your hand.

“Quit that.”

“Why?”

He shrugged. “It’s kinda cute.”

“Me having a panic attack is cute?”

His eyes nearly bugged out of his head, but stopped when you laughed.

“I’m kidding. Sorry, I couldn’t help it.”

He let out a breath. “Man, I haven’t been that scared since my mom looked in the shoebox under my bed when I was seventeen.”

You smiled, shaking your head. “You didn’t answer me.”

“What?”

“I asked why she was mad at you.”

He nodded slowly, chewing at his bottom lip.

“Uh, well, when I asked Beard where you were and he said you were sick, she was in the middle of trying to get me to go to her hotel room.”

You felt your stomach sink again, looking away in hopes he wouldn’t catch the shift in your demeanor.

He continued, “I told her I had something more important to do. She didn’t like that a whole lot.”

“You did?”

“Yep.”

You swallowed hard. “So, it is my fault.”

He huffed out a sigh. “Can you quit that? I turned down sex to come sit on the ground with you, and you know what? In any case I would always rather be here with you. Panic attack or not. You could literally just ask me to sit on the ground with you and I would always say yes.”

“Well, that’s just dumb.”

He pulled your head towards his chest, resting his chin on the top of your head.

“You always see right through me like I’m a dang department store window. Now, of all times, is when you decide to just… Not get it.”

You played with the buttons of his dress shirt and quirked a brow.

“What the heck are you talking about?”

“You know, I thought you might get it all the times I asked you to come get dinner or coffee with me. Or maybe every time I come bother you and stick around way longer than I normally would with anyone else— and that’s saying something. I was really hoping you’d get it when we were holding hands on our walk today, but of course not.”

He laughed, pressing a quick kiss to the top of your head before he pulled back to look at you. You watched him with wide eyes, questioning his intentions and hoping you weren’t somehow still misreading this.

“You gonna make me say it?” He asked with a smile.

“I’d prefer if you did.”

He laughed, shaking his head. He then looked up at the ceiling, trying to search for the right words to say. They must have come to him, because he looked back to you, and simply stared for a minute before he finally started talking.

“You’re one of the kindest people I know. Like, Mr. Rogers reincarnated. You always know how to cheer me up. You always know how to help me, and everyone else in your life, somehow. I think you’re incredible. I think you are so funny and so talented and crazy smart. I even think you’re stupidly gorgeous when you’ve got makeup running all over your cheeks,” he said with a laugh, then continued when he got reassurance from your smiling face. “I’ve been scared to get close to anyone since… Since the divorce. You made it so easy, though. I’ve known you forever, but now— I guess I just realized a few months ago that nobody’s ever been there for me like you. You never tell me I’m too much. You never expect me to be… I don’t know. You don’t ever expect me to be on all the time. I can just be me, good or bad, and you still treat me the same.”

You watched him with a rapidly beating heart. Though, this time, it wasn’t telling you to run. It wanted nothing more than for you to stay right where you were.

“That’s something the Doc told me. That we’re good for each other because of that,” you said quietly.

He nodded. “I know, and she’s right. She helped me realize I had feelings for you. Real feelings.”

You bit your lip, then grinned. “Are you gonna crack a joke any time soon? Because all of this serious from you is becoming a little scary.”

His face lit up, and he laughed. You smiled with him, leaning into him for a hug. He held you close, taking in several deep breaths and enjoying the moment, then kissed your cheek as he pulled back again.

“Uh, so… Is this just gonna be me confessing and you get to sit there and tell me to do a crap ton of Hail Mary’s?”

You smiled. “There’s my Ted.”

His brows raised. “Your Ted, huh?”

You laughed, wiggling out of his grip. He let you, and you stood up, reaching for him. He stood with you, not letting go of your hands.

“You’re not going to let go of my hand to check a nonexistent message again, right?”

You smiled, looking down. “You caught that?”

“I can read you almost as well as you can read me. I knew something was up.”

You shook your head, walking into him and wrapping him in a hug again.

“I see things are a little better now,” Beard said, leaning against the doorframe of the office.

You let go of Ted, turning towards Beard.

“Hey. I’m sorry about—”

He held up a hand. “Don’t be. I was kind of being an ass anyways.”

You gave him a tight lipped smile, nodding a little.

“You two figure out… All that business?” He asked, pointing between the two of you.

Ted smiled, “Yeah, we did.”

“Good.”

He waved and left with that, the two of you alone once more.

Ted grabbed your hand, lacing his fingers with yours.

“Let’s go home and maybe… Clean up. We kind of look crazy,” he smiled.

“Can we head to mine first? I want to get out of this dress.”

“Why don’t we just go to mine?”

He raised his brows in question, and you couldn’t help but smile. Now at least you didn’t have to pretend you didn’t think he was adorable.

“I need clothes.”

He quirked a brow. “I think you’d look awfully cute in my clothes.”

You laughed, “Okay, fair enough.”

“Ready to go home, then, sweetpea?”

“Of course.”

#ted lasso fic #ted lasso fanfiction #ted lasso fanfic #ted lasso x reader #ted lasso x y/n #ted lasso fluff #ted lasso angst #ted lasso anxiety #ted lasso #the archer

[riverbutghost]

Can you write a one shot where Y/n is self harming and how Simon is reacting to that?

This is my first request!!!!!!!

Also, I’m so so so sorry for this, this isn’t how i expected it to turn out, also I have a severe migraine right now and can’t look at screen too much. I wrote it super fast. Apologies, and promise that i’ll write more soon.

Go ahead and request with an angst prompt !!

Pairing: Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley x GN!Reader

Summary: You used to self harm, but after attending military you stopped. Certain someone made you break, though.

Warnings: Graves is an asshole, no touching but cat calling?, Self harm, depression topics, kind of ooc simon, mentions of suicide…

Even though you were feeling down lately, your friends were always there for you. You knew it.

Your mental health wasn’t always perfect, and you knew it would take a while to heal. But even after healing, you knew it would always come back.

“It’s okay, you’re okay. I’m glad you chose me to vent about it.”

It was always easy to vent to Soap, he would always make you chuckle or smile.

“It’s cool y’know? I know why you’re feeling this way. But it will always get better.”

Gaz would pat your hair, cuddle you a little like a brother and give you a chocolate. He would make you smile.

Simon wasn’t there usually. And no, you wouldn’t seek comfort from him either way. You knew the man wasn’t a people person, and he wouldn’t do anything other than getting annoyed.

So after your mission went smoothly, everyone wanted to celebrate and drink. Not you for sure.

You weren’t feeling good and stable so you politely declined. This, of course drew your friends’ attention. You just told them you were tired, because you didn’t want them to miss out on their time. They finally accepted and left the base to have fun.

You, on the other hand wasn’t feeling too well. It was overwhelming, to feel that way after a success.

“Congratulations, soldier. But you missed your shot. It was a stupid thing to do, the target wasn’t even moving ahahah.”

You furrowed your eyebrows after remembering your commander’s words. Graves, he was something. He would constantly pick on you, even though he had told you he liked you. You couldn’t understand him, was he that kind of person who would bully their crushes? Yeah, no.

You shook your head, clearing your mind of those thoughts. You needed a bath, and the base was empty. You smiled to yourself weakly. This was going to be a long shower.

You closed your door, but didn’t lock it. You didn’t care because the base was empty. You stripped off your clothes and got in.

-

“Is she okay?”

Simon furrowed his eyebrows.

“Who?”

Soap rolled his eyes and cursed through the phone. He told him your name, and Simon cursed himself too.

“Didn’t know she was here,”

Simon swore that he heard Soap rolling his eyes.

“Whatever, I gotta go. Don’t get wasted, yeah?”

Simon didn’t wait for an answer before shutting the phone down. He got up and went to his bathroom, ready to take a shower. He locked the door before pulling his mask off.

He got in, warm water immediately softening his tense shoulders. He sighed and closed his eyes.

-

You had decided to grab something from the kitchen before combing your hair. So here you were, eating an apple while going to your room.

“Ooof, here you are.”

You stopped dead in your tracks after someone grabbed your shoulders from behind.

“Our talk was interrupted,”

You swallowed and smiled at him, even though his eyes were raking up and down your body. You shifted uncomfortably.

“Oh, uhm- yeah. I don’t see you like that-“

His hands moved to your waist and you gasped quietly.

“C’mon, we both know what you want. Don’t resist it.”

You pushed him hard enough to let him off and he just snorted.

“I told you. I don’t want you, Graves.”

He rolled his eyes.

“Is that why you wear these shorts huh? Why your hair is wet and free? Don’t play dumb, you want it. Don’t worry, even if you’re bad in bed it would worth it and I won’t tell anyone.”

He winked and that was the final straw. You kicked him in his crotch, and pushed him with all your force. He groaned and gritted his teeth.

“Fuckin’ bitch. You’re gonna regret that!”

You just walked hurriedly to your room and locked the door behind you.

You didn’t know when, but you had started crying. You sat down in front of your door and cried silently.

When you realized you had dropped your apple there, you started crying harder.

“Fuck,”

You sniffled and gripped your phone. But you couldn’t, they were having fun and you wouldn’t dare to ruin it.

You closed your eyes, tried doing the breathing techniques your therapist had taught you.

“I can’t believe you’re our teammate now, you should be a model.”

“I can keep you company, you know?”

“But you’re asking for it.”

“You don’t have a boyfriend? Such a shame, you have a good physique.”

“Believe me sweetheart, no one would talk to you if you weren’t that beautiful.”

“That pretty face is missing something, a smile?”

“Oh my God, be a lady and bow down to me will you? ahahah..”

“Fuck!”

You quickly got up, the voices in your head were ringing and ringing. Graves’ voice was ringing. It kept getting louder.

You opened your drawer and took out your knife, and held it in your hand for a second.

The voices are going to stop, you thought. It will get better if I do this, you convinced yourself.

You cut your wrist, hands shaky from the panic attack. Your breaths were unstable, shallow.

You cut your wrist again, the voices were now getting weaker.

“What the fuck is going on?!”

You jumped forward with the knife in your hand. Simon gasped for a second before holding you and looking at you.

“What happened?!”

Simon shook your shoulders, not knowing what to do. You were just as shocked as him, and didn’t move a muscle.

Simon’s eyes went up to your hair and down to your feet. His breath shook as he noticed the blood dropping from your cuts.

“What the- What did you do?!”

Simon quickly took the knife and threw it across the room, then he picked you up and carried you to the bathroom.

He put you down to the floor of the shower cabin and washed your face.

“Wait here, ‘kay? I’ll be back.”

He quickly went back to his room, grabbed the first aid kit and came rushing back.

He carefully took your wrist, inspected it and worked on it quietly.

You were still in shock, eyes looking empty at the ground. It was all so quick, and your mind wasn’t comprehending it.

Simon called your real name and you suddenly looked up. It was like a switch. You furrowed your eyebrows and looked at your wrist.

“Oh my God- I fuck!”

“Shh-“

You silently cried as he bandaged your wrist, thankfully you didn’t cut that deep.

After a minute or so, he got up and picked you up. He went towards your bed, and put you down. He sat down as well.

“Why? I don’t understand anything.”

You swallowed and looked down.

“I was suicidal before. And it just, I don’t know. I got triggered I guess.” You mumbled and shrugged.

Simon just narrowed his eyes. How could you be so calm about it?

“But what happened? What triggered it?”

You sighed as you let yourself down on your mattress.

“Don’twannatalkaboutit.”

Simon raised an eyebrow.

“What? Speak up soldier. C’mon now, you know you can talk to me.”

“Graves…”

Simon shot up.

“What did that fucker do?!”

You just sighed and curled up more.

“Nothing,I-“

Simon quickly got out of your room, leaving you speechless and scared. You were scared to be alone, and scared that Graves would say some shit and Ghost would believe them.

You just closed your eyes and sighed again, suddenly fee exhausted and tired.

It was so quick, so fast like it was a dream.

“What the fuck just happened..” You mumbled to yourself.

Soon enough, Simon came back. He knocked on your door and you mumbled for him to come in.

“Took care of it.”

Your heart broke a little after that. Not in a bad way, you might add.

“Thank you. I’m just exhausted, I guess. Never really thought I would ever do that again.”

Simon held your hand as you looked up at him. His eyes took you in and left you breathless in an instant. He attempted to say something, but didn’t. You smiled at him softly, laying down on the bed.

“I’m gonna go, yeah..”

He scratched the back of his neck, and contemplated for a moment to say anything else.

But he got up, leaving your room after looking you one last time.

It was probably for another day. You would talk with him another day.

#call of duty #call of dooty #cod mwf2 #simon riley #simon riley angst #simon riley x reader #simon riley x you #ghost x you #simon ghost riley #simon riley fluff #cod mw x reader #cod modern warfare #request for riverbutghost

[shelbgrey]

Can you please do one with Seeley Booth with the writing prompt being 0.7 (“he's not my boyfriend” - “I think you better tell him that” - “what?” - “only love makes you that crazy”) tumblr is starting to run dry on bones imagines and I think you would make a great story with this prompt. Please?

In the name of love (Seeley Booth)

Paring: Seeley Booth x Hodgins!Reader

Prompt: 0.7) “he's not my boyfriend” - “I think you better tell him that” - “what?” - “only love makes you that crazy”

A/n: sorry this took so long and that is got pretty long. Also I had to switch the roles in the prompt for it make since.

MasterList

In the end I couldn't really tell you how we ended up in this situation, all battered up and in fear what the Bureau would say when they find out me and Lance let the perp go. But most of all I was afraid what Seeley would say when he saw the both of us. I got the shortest end of the stick, busted face and knuckles and my ribs were aching somthing fierce.

Fear in Lance's eyes only intensifies when Seeley's name pops up, trying to call me. “it's Seeley”

I hand Lance the phone so he could talk to him. “he'll know something is up if I talk to him” my voice was horse already and I was shaking from the resent beat up.

Lance gulped and took the phone to talk to Seeley while he drove through the city. “H-hey b-booth we got a situation” I sighed as Lance immediately cracked pressure. Do to the lack of music or sound in general in the car I could vaguely hear Seeley on the other side of the phone.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait a second. What’s going on, what the hell happened?” Seeley asked from the other side of the phone.

I quickly shook my head no at Lance as he continued to talk to Seeley through my phone. Lance gulped and continued to drive while talking to Seeley on the phone “this isn't really phone conversation material... Are you at your office?” Lance asked with a hint of nervousness.

There was silence on both ends of the phone, Lance glances over at me nervous as Seeley hesitates on the other side of the phone. “Yeah, I am. What are you talking about? And where the hell did you go? We were supposed to bring Fredrick Batmen in today”

Fredrick Batmen so that's this name, at least I know the name of the guy who put a couple of dense in me. I looked over at Lance, shaking my head. We weren't supposed go out by ourselves. We both only just got our license to carry a weapon when we assisted the FBI.

“umm...” Lance said looking at me quickly then back at the road. I threw my pounding head back on the head rest of the car as Lance continued to lose his cool.

“hang up the phone lance” I said softly so Seeley didn't hear me on his side of the phone.

“umm....” Lance said as Seeley spoke on the phone, he looked at me in a panic. Huh, I've never seen a psychologist lose their cool before.

I could hear Seeley getting frustrated on the other side of the phone “Hey, Sweets. Just tell me what the hell is going on?”

Lance took a deep breath and regained his composer “I'm almost the Bureau... I'll explain when I get there” he said through the phone to Seeley.

“No, no, no. Listen... you want to tell me what's going on and you want to tell me right now” Seeley says as bit louder, making the conversation clear to my ears.

“Umm...” Lance and I both prayed that Seeley didn't ask for me.

I could hear Seeley sigh in frustration on the other side of the phone “Come on, Sweets, you are starting to piss me off here.”

“This is something you don't want to hear on the phone and as a psychologist I should have the right to say on behalf of your temper and mental health” Lance thought he was gonna win this conversation I on the other hand had been best friends with Seeley for a long time and I knew Seeley doesn't give up especially if phycology gets thrown in.

“Yes... He definitely gonna listen now” I sighed as I wrapped a hankerchief tighter around my bloody nuckles. “we're doomed” I mumbled as I heard Seeley saying Lance shouldn't bring up phycology now. I thanked God when Lance got closer to the Bureau.

Seeley then started shouting at Lance, which was rare thing for him rase his voice at me or Lance. “you are making this worse! Just tell me what is going on right now!”

I slapped my forehead in frustration, as much as I cared for lance and he was indeed like a little brother he was being pretty stupid. “For Pete's sake” I sighed and weakly snatched the phone “Seeley! Hey buddy, like Lance said we're on our way and you making Lance nervous isn't helping the situation... I'm gonna hang up now and we'll fill you in when we get to your office”

“No, no, no. Don't hang up!” Seeley started, he then hesitates. “I know you are hiding something, I can tell by your tone. Just tell me what the hell is going on so I can stay calm”

“Just stay calm anyway” I said softly and hung up the phone before Seeley could protest anymore. I hung up the phone and looked at Lance “your terrible at lying, especially to Seeley” I sighed as Lance pulling into the Bureau's parking lot.

“sorry” Lance mumbles as he puts the car in park. I winced at the pain in my ribs when I tried to clime out of the car. I sighed and slouched back in the passenger seat, it felt like dozens of kitchen knives beening stabed into my side.

I terned to Lance with pain in my eyes “Help me will ya?” Lance quickly nodded and climed out of the car, racing to the passenger door. “easy, easy” Lance mumbles as he slowly helped me out of the car and supported me by puting on of my arms on his shoulder as we both slowly walked into the FBI building to Seeley's office.

Lance walked me to Seeley's office and enters without knocking. With the windows suronding the door of the office Seeley could see us limping in before we even entered the small room.

Seeley quickly shot up from his office chair and raced to the both of us “What the hell happened to you, n/n?” asked softly as he helped Lance set me down in the leather chair infront of his desk.

“Oh you know the usual” I winced when I tried to relax in the chair. “I'm gonna get the first-aid kik” Lance quickly said and left to get the supplies from his office.

Seeley leaned against his desk, standing in between the chair I was seeing in and his desk. Fear plastered his face as he stared down at me “what the hell happened to you?” you could tell he was trying not to freak out, which was an emotion he hated having.

Lance quickly came back to Seeley's office and handed the first-aid kit to Seeley. “thanks Sweets, I got this” he said motioning that he's clean up my cuts himself. Lance nodded and gently padded my shoulder before he left.

I sighed and looked a Seeley, I took a deep breath and started to explain everything. “me and Lance left to get the guy in custody, the Batmen dude... We got in a fight and he got away” I looked down at my busted knuckles as tears pooled my eyes, it stinged when I rubbed my hands together nervously “I'm sorry I let him get away” a tear fell done my cheek quicker then I lost my cool.

Seeley's eyes softened as he knelt infront of the chair I was setting in, he gently takes my bloodied hand in his massive ones. “it's okay” he whispered softly she wipe a splatter of blood off my chin. “Don't worry about that. I'm just glad you two are alright. We'll catch him another time. It's okay.”

I looked up as his soft eyes and let out a shaky breath. I could tell he was hiding his anger as he cleaned my cuts. I knew he wasn't mad at me but at the guy we've been chasing, I could see his jaw clinching as he cleaned up my face with the stuff from the first-aid kit “I'm sorry Seel” I mumbled again.

Seeley take's my chin and slowly lifts my head so we're looking at each other. “It. Is. Not. Your. Fault. You. Hear. Me?” he said, making tears prick my eyes once they met his brown ones.

Seeley softly smiled and wiped the tears runing down my face “It's going to be okay. I promise. How bad are you hurt?”

I didn't want to worry him anymore, so I shook my head and nervously chewed on my busted lip. Seeley gently pulled my bottom away from my teeth as I responded “not bad”

Seeley smirks softly but still gives me a 'yeah right' look “You have blood on your shirt, blood on your face, bruises on your face. I mean Lance is the psychologist, but I'm pretty sure that counts as bad” he said as he cleaned the cut on my forehead “Where else you hurt?” he asked again.

I tried to reassure him, but when I tried to adjust in the chair I winced when the sharp pain in my ribs came back. Out of instinct my hand fell to my waist trying to put pressure on it.

Seeley looked down as after he put a bandge on my forehead. “your rib? Is it your ribs?” he asked softly.

“Let me see” Seeley mumbled and gently lifted my shirt up just a little bit. I winced when my shirt and his fingers brushed up against it. I also couldn't help but blush when his large hands pushed my shirt up reveing my bruised body.

He sighed softly as his eyes held nothing but concern or disappointment. “yeah... you are hurt pretty bad” he look at me and all my injuries, then look down and away. You could see the red tint in his skin as the anger boiled in side him at. He was Really, Really, Angry now. Seeley sighed.

“I'm okay Seeley” I said in a serious tone, I knew he didn't believe me and honestly I didn't know if I believed me either.

“Iet me see your hands” he mumbled as he grabbed a fresh cotton ball and the bottle of alcohol. I wined softly as he cleaned my knuckles. “i know, I'm almost done” he whispered, he looked like he was trying to bottle up every negative emotion possible right now. I could only imagine what he'd do when he crosses paths with the perp.

After he cleaned my knuckles, he gently wrapped the up and then kiss my hand. I blushed at the small gesture. It felt different then the other times we've touched, I'd admit we're pretty touchy as best friends go and it was probably no secret to anyone that I had a crush on him, but I couldn't stop but melt when his lips touched me.

“Look at me, alright? Can you look at me?” Seeley asked, taking my bruised face in his hands”

“hm?” I asked, looking into his eyes.

I don't think either of us were prepared for what happened next. Seeley slowly lean in, with his hand on my cheek then kisses me on the lips softly. It took me by surprise, but once I registered what was happening I melted into the kiss, placing my bandage covered hand on his jaw as I gently deepen the kiss dispite the pain in my busted lip. I never wanted the kiss to end, but the sting in my lip made me pull apart gently.

Seeley look at me with a dopey smirk. “you don't know how long I've been waiting to do that” he whispered as he rested his forehead on mine, breathing hard. He looked at me, all bloody, swollen face, then kisses my lips again once more, softer than the first, but just as passionate. I leaned into the kiss My hands run through his hair.

“Your not gonna let me in on a case for a while, are you?” I joked as rested my forehead on his and I nuzzled my noise against his.

He shook his head, slightly smiling. “Never in a million years. I'm not letting you get hurt on my watch again.”

“guess that's what a squint gets for leaving that lab and doing FBI stuff” I joked.

Seeley chuckled and rolled his eyes. “anything eles hurting?” he asked softly as he rubbed my arms in a comforting way.

“I'm okay” I kissed his nose softly “you patched me up pretty good already” I smiled, but I couldn't hide the wince I made due to my ribs hurt after I shifted in his lap.

Seeley notices immediately. “What is it? Your ribs” he asked, I nodded softly. “It's just bruised... I'll put some ice on it or something when I get home” I said looking down.

Seeley takes my chin and our eyes locked. “y/n, I'm your best friend. So please, listen to me for a minute, okay? You hurt your ribs pretty bad today. You need to let the med techs look at you, please?” his eyes held so much plea and his voice was laced with pure desperation.

I sighed and rested my forehead on his. I kissed his lips softly and quickly. “you know I don't like doctors” I mumbled... He knew that, that's why I chose to come to him instead of the med clinic after I got beat up.

“know, n/n. I know, But It'll just a quick check-up. don't worry. Please?” he stared at me with brown puppy eyes as he softly held my face in my hands. I couldn't ignore his silently beg for me to get help at the clinic.

I rolled my eyes playfully. “I guarantee my ribs are just bruised... I'm a doctor too ya know”

“your a Forensic Entomologist... A bug girl” Seeley said in a serious tone as he helped me stand up, slowly and easy. “It's still a doctor though” my argument ended with a wince.

Seeley looks at me sternly for a moment. “Promise me, y/n, that you'll listen to the medical staff at the Bureau. Okay? Promise me.”

I sighed and looked at his brown eyes, I loved them so much. “promise....”

Seeley gently helped me walk to the door so I didn't irritate my ribs anymore. “aren't you the one who went to work with a screwed up back even though the doctor told you to stay home?” my joking tone turned into a wince when I held on to his bicep as I walked towrds the med clinic with him.

Seeley looked down and playfully rolled his eyes “Okay, you got me there... But, in my defense, I was going a little stir crazy being at home after a week.” I chuckle as he kiss me on the forehead to ease the pain.

“We're here, n/n. Let's get this over with and I'll take you home, okay?” Seeley mumbled as we exited the elevator that led us to the floor that had the med clinic.

the doctor came out of her office and smiled softly “Come on in Dr. Y/n Hodgins” she lead me and Seeley to one of the rooms, Seeley helped me up on one of the examination beds as the doctor looked at her clip board.

The doctor examined my ribs, I winced when she hit the wrong spot “a couple of your ribs are broken... But I'd like to take in x-ray” the doctor said. I looked over at Seeley and he looked angrier than before.

“I guess we'll get you an x-ray and some pain meds in ya” Seeley said. the doctor looked up and gave the both of us a soft expression.

“I'm afraid so” she looked up at Seeley “you'll have to wait in the waiting room unfortunately” the doctor told Seeley.

“okay, sure” Seeley said and then gently take my. “I'm gonna be right outside that door if you need me, okay?”

I nodded and Seeley kissed my forehead before going outside.

-------(Seeley's pov)-------

Before I exit the room, I smile at her. But then once I am out of the room, my expression turns serious as I sit down in the waiting room and anxiously await the results of her xray. I leaned forward in the chair and tapped my foot anxiously. The more I thought and tapped, the angrier I got. My jaw ticked and I covered my face with both of my hands.

“How is she?” Sweets asked, walking up to me with his hands in his pockets. I removed my hands and looked at him, I just now noticed he had a few cuts and bruise of his own, he wasn't as bad as y/n though.

“her ribs are broken, the doc is getting X-rays now.” I don't look up at Sweets as he looked just as worried. The panic in his eyes made me think about how I always thought she would choose Sweets inset of me. I never have thought she'd feel the same way I feel about her, that kiss changed everything and it couldn't have happened at a worser time.

I think Sweets could see the anger boiling inside me as I sat there. No amount of psychology could help the anger I was feeling. Sweets sighed, I knew he was hiding something. I looked up at him waiting for him to share whatever he was hiding. “they cought the guy... The guy that hurt y/n... Aubrey just brought him in” I immediately dart up from my seat, running on nothing but anger, Sweets grabed the sleeve of my suit jacket, pulling me back “don't do anything stupid” he said in serious tone. I didn't know why he said it, Sweets knew I would do it anyway.

I jerked my arm out of his grip and turned my back on him and head towrds the interrogation room. “I'm definitely gonna do something stupid” I mumbled as speed walked down the hallway.

I take a deep breath and walk into the interrogation room. I look up and see the guy, sitting across the table from me, with a huge smile on his face. He looks cocky, arrogant. I glare at him. And for a moment, I don't see what I can do to the guy. And then a smile slowly creeps across my face, He's not leaving this room. The interrogation has just begin.

“I'm getting tired of seeing you guys sniffing around my life” the guy says in a gruff tone, he gave me a creepy smirk. “expect for the girl... She was a cute little thing” he mocked as he referred to y/n. The man was twice her size, meaning he probably had no problem beating her. But that didn't mean he didn't look like hell, y/n put up one hell of a fight. His face was all busted up, worse than y/n's was and he was holding a gallon bag of ice on his groin.

When I look at the guy and I can barely contain my anger. I lean forward on the table and put my elbows on it. “Look, pal. Here's how it's gonna be. You hurt my partner, My best friend. You broke her ribs. I could care a less what you did before this. But you did this And for that, you're not gonna see the light of day ever again”

The guy just smirked and let out a laugh. “You think you scare me?” I glared at him, he just didn't understand the hole he dug himself in.

“You don't scare me, man” the guy said in a gruff voice, he leaned forward and smirked. “why get interrogated by you when I could get questioned by your cute little partner”

I scolded myself when the guy now knew y/n was my soft spot, my weakness and if he wanted to get under my skin he knew to bring her up. He knew what he did to her and he didn't care.

My jaw clintched with rage. “Hey. You shut your goddamn mouth when you speak about my partner. Do you understand?” I say, not breaking eye contact. The guy continues to smirk. He knew he was pushing my buttons and he was loving it. I can feel the anger boiling in my veins.

“She's got some fire in her and put up a good fight but it wasn't hard to get her to the ground” the guy chuckled darkly.

I stand up out of my chair. “you think you're funny, huh? I said for you to shut your goddamn mouth. I ask the question!” My hands clench into fists. I look like I am about to snap.

“If it means seeing her again I'll do it again” the guy leaned forward expressionless. “maybe next time I'll get my hand around her pretty little throat”

“I have had it.” I said threw my teeth, can't take it anymore. I grab the guy by the collar, pushing him against the wall and start to beat his face in. One, two, three punches directly to the nose and the jaw. I look into his eyes with rage and hatred. “That is for hurting my partner.”

Three more punches land on his face, making him fall to the chair in his own pool of blood. I stare at him. “That was for threatening to hurt her again.”

that's when Sweets and Bones came rushing in and separated me and the guy, I struggled in Sweets' arms trying to swing another punch towrds the guy “Booth stop” Sweets grunted as he and Bones tried to pull us apart.

I tried my hardest to get loose from Sweets' grip. “Let go of me! Let go of me!” I scream. But Sweets had a tight hold on me.

My anger had blinded me. I was out of control. “let's go” Sweets pushed me out of the interrogation room “your gonna get in a lot of trouble, you relize that?” Bones said. I didn't give a damn especially since it involved y/n.

“I don't care! I do NOT care right now. This guy was threatening to kill y/n!” I scream out, still fighting to break free from Sweet's grip “I would do it again in a heartbeat. You hear me?! You hear me?!”

“Booth, I understand your anger, but right now the best option is to calm down” Bones said calmly.

tears fall down my cheeks and anger bored in to my eyes as Sweets pushed me out of the interrogation room. My knuckles were bruised and bloody from the fight. But I didn't even notice them.

Sweets and Bones shared looks “Dr. Brennan, please tell Caroline what happened... Explain y/n was asulted and Booth acted strictly on self defense”

Bones immediately leaves the room as I continue trying to break free from Sweets “Please, Sweets. Just let me go. I don't care about the God-damned consequences. I just need to let this out. I just need to let my anger out.” I look angry but then I look sad and scared at the same time. I don't know what to feel at this point.

Sweets pushed me towards his office where he did most of his therapy sessions. I was bigger then Sweets but some how he manged to shove me into his office. “your girlfriend isn't goona like it when she leaves the med clinic and finds out you lost your FBI license because you beat a guy to death”

Sweets set down in his chair and pointed to a shelf with a bunch of books and fidget stuff. “break what you want...take your anger out”

I walk over to the shelf and grab a stress ball and a book. And then I come back to the chair. I sit down and start squeezing the stress ball. I don't say anything as I continued to squeeze the stress ball harder and harder. The stress ball is about to pop.

“she's not my girlfriend” I mumbled, as much as I wanted her to be it wasn't the time to bring it up... Even if we did kiss.

Sweets rested his cheek on his as he watches the stress ball pop in my hands “I think you better tell her that”

“what are you taking about?... What?” I asked confused as I grab another stress ball and squeeze it. I continue to squeeze the stress ball as hard as possible.

“only love makes you that crazy” Sweets replies. The stress ball popped in my head. “you said I could break stuff not get a therapy season” I said.

“Your not gonna get in trouble Booth. The guy as multiple accounts of asulting woman and now murder is on his track record... There's no fights it's our word against his” Sweet said.

I crushed another stress ball, this time I throw it on the ground in frustration. “he hurt y/n and you were making sure it never happens again... The guy already has life in prison for the murder case we were solving” Sweets says softly.

I throw my stress ball against the wall and I grab another one. I squeeze harder and harder. “But, you know I could've handled this differently” I squeeze the stress ball as hard as possible so much so that it hurts my hand. “I mean, I did not have to beat him up like that. He did not need my knuckles buried deep in his face. I could've shown restraint.” I grumbled.

“Booth, no one blames you”

“I should've handled it differently... I could've controlled my anger.” I squeeze the stress ball harder and harder to the point that my knuckles are bleeding. “I didn't do the right thing. I let my anger get the best of me” I am squeezing the stress ball so bad that I don't even realize the blood on my hand.

My phone suddenly rings, so I take out my phone and answer it. “Hey, y/n” I say, sounding worried and anxious. “Are you okay? How are you doing?”

“I'm alright, but I have to stay home for awhile because of my stupid rib... Are you okay? You sound weird” she asked through the phone worried.

“yeah, I am... What's up?”

“Can you come back to med clinic and get me please?” she asked softly, she still sounded worried though.

“Sure, no problem” I say through the phone. “Just let me finish up here and I will be right there.” I look over at Sweets. I feel guilty for taking my anger out.

“I'll be about... fifteen minutes. Okay?” I hang up the phone and immediately left Sweets office with a quick goodbye.

-------(1st pov)-------

I'm waiting for Seeley in the waiting room outside of the med clinic, as I am I stare at my pain meds with a bord expression.

“Hey n/n. How are you doing, sweetheart?” Seeley asked walking over to me slowly. I get up and wrap my arms around him, trying not to disturb my ribs. “I'm so happy to see you right now” Seeley mumbled against my shoulder.

“What happened to you?” I asked worried as I noticed his knuckles were all red and bruised. He quickly shook his head no. I gently left his arms and gave him a stern expression “what happened to your hands? And don't tell me nothing”

Seeley look down at his hands and then back up at me. “Well, I am not proud of this... But I beat up the guy that hurt you. You know, the one that broke your ribs”

I let out a deep breath and gave him a soft look. “oh Seeley” I looked at him with no judgment as I placed my bandaged covered hand over his cheek and rubbed it softly with my thumb.

Seeley nuzzles into my touch and take a deep breath and slowly open his eyes. “Look, n/n. I... I was wrong... I shouldn't have done that. I am not proud of it in any way. It just happened and I didn't think I could control it.” Seeley mumbles as tears pricked the corner of his eyes.

I quickly wipe away the tears as they fall, I kissed his forehead and wrap my arms around him, hoddling him tight not caring about my broken ribs. “Shh... It's okay” I whispered as I ran my fingers through his short hair.

“I love you” he blurts out. I leaned out of his arms and looked up into his eyes suprised. “I'm s-”

“I love you too” I whispered and pressed my lips to his, not caring if anyone saw us.

#Seeley Booth #Seeley Booth x reader #Seeley Booth imagines #Bones imagines #david boreanaz x reader #Bones TV show #Bones x reader #James Aubrey x Sister!reader #Prompts #David Boreanaz #Bones headcanons #seeley booth headcanons #Agent Booth #Agent Booth x reader #Agent Booth imagines

[studentinpursuitofclouds]

Here's a silly idea if you wanna try it, no pressure!

How do you think the bachelor's/bachelorette's world react to the Farmer casually mentioning a blue man who leaves notes for them around town as challenges who also keeps cameras around town to watch them?

They do not elaborate, the Farmer just moves on like they talked about the birds lmaooo

Oh, man. I found the idea itself so funny that inspiration immediately kicked my ass 🤣 There's already been more than one mention for Qi and about his weird obsession with Farmer, strange quests and, God forgive me, about "snake milk"... Sheesh 😅

Thank you so much for the ask! ☺️ (hope I translated this correctly. Or feel free to ask again!)

SDV bachelors/ettes react to Farmer, who casually mentioned Mr. Qi:

_________________________________________

"You gotta drink less so you don't see shit." It's unusual to hear Shane say that, but even he doesn't remember drinking so much that he saw some hallucinations like "blue men". He'd let Farmer's words pass his ears and now was beginning to wonder if he should let his dear niece near that weirdo. Challenges, cameras everywhere... yeah sure.

The doctor's instincts hit right away and Harvey will run after Farmer to see if they have a fever. Cameras in the whole Stardew Valley? Dangerous quests in Calico Dessert? Sorry Farmer, but Harvey won't believe it and will insist they go to the clinic for a check up, or at least rest at home. You can’t ignore rest, you know, because it affects both physical and mental health...

"So I'm not the only one who noticed it." Wait, what? How does Sebastian know? "Found a weird note with your name on it when I was in the mines." Hold on, what was a local emo doing in the mines? And why is his arm in bandages? "Hm, let't change the subject, we were talking about blue stranger, weren't we?" Wait a minute, Seb!

Alex probably won't even listen to what the Farmer is saying. "Huh? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever you say, weirdo." The athlete may not be a genius, but even he can realize that there's no benefit to anyone putting cameras in Pelican Town for, like, what? Fun or whatever? To keep tabs on Farmer? That's stupid. Don't be stupid, Farmer.

"Wait, seriously? Yo, no kidding." With a lifestyle like Farmer's, Sam immediately believed in their words even without the details. However, the interest and desire to organize a quest with his friends to find the "secrets of the Valley" quickly faded away as the skateboarder's stomach rumbled. He would just forget the whole thing later.

Honestly, Elliott is completely confused. How should he react to what his friend Farmer has just said? The writer thinks it's complete nonsense, but because of his manners and his unwillingness to be confrontational or rude, Elliott will simply try to change the subject.

"Absurd", Abigail thought, but somehow the Farmer's words stuck in her mind. Considering that the purple-haired girl was just looking for an excuse to procrastinate duties, her ass began her own adventure of finding cameras. And she found one right away! And a strange note from someone named "Qi"! Wtf, hey Farmer, tell again about that weird blue dude!

"Ok, let's think: why would someone follow you around 24/7 and give you weird tasks?" For some reason, Maru was very much interested in Farmer's casually thrown words, trying to make sense of them. It's unclear, really, where this interest comes from, but maybe the young inventor wants to spend more time with Farmer. Even if the conversation is kinda strange.

Penny did her best to keep her smile from looking too forced. Wishing to remain polite and not to be rude, the red-haired teacher simply thanked Farmer for the conversation and went about her business, trying not to think too much about their words.

"The blue man? Oh, has Clint been drinking that Joja soda again?" No, Emily, that wasn't Clint, and he only turned blue once (and that was probably from worry, not from Joja cola). She would have forgotten about Farmer's words, but she also could swear that Sandy had once mentioned a similar person paying the rent in Oasis. Hmm, maybe Emily should ask again...

When Farmer told Haley about the strange blue man and other oddities, the blonde paused and wondered: if she should really have even listened to the words of a person who just a couple days ago had been rummaging through trash cans and eating raw seaweed? The answer was obvious, and Haley forgot about it as a misunderstanding.

Leah only shakes her head. "Whatever you say, Farmer." She doesn't want to be rude to them, but all this talk of cameras, dangerous quests, and a mysterious man hasn't impressed her one bit. If Farmer keeps this up - they'll always be considered a weirdo.

#stardew valley #sdv #thanks for the ask! #sdv sebastian #sdv harvey #sdv sam #sdv shane #sdv elliott #sdv alex #sdv penny #sdv emily #sdv haley #sdv abigail #sdv maru #sdv leah #sdv headcanons

[siremasterlawrence]

My Personal Virtual Transition

I won a weird competition to use a Spiralistix virtual reality A+ glasses at the laboratory I am assigned to go to and I pack my bags to head to London when I am greeted by a the limo driver.

The limo is rather bare all that I see is a less then twin like bed I lay down in when a pair of the goggles pop down and I place them on my head instantly a light flashes in my eyes.

I fall deep a sleep as my mind transfers over to the mainframe of the device leaving me in a pitch black room and I am left in darkness until a ball of light appears filing up the whole space.

The ball projects a image of a blank virtual male leaving me at a loss except I saw Tom Hardy in the ball showcasing him at some major celebrity event in a dashing suit I can only imagine.

Next thing I know suddenly I am falling in to a deep sleep body, mind and soul are soon transferring in to the ball all of sudden I am hit with a shock appearing at the event and I see it.

Crowds screaming as they are surrounding me, more hands reaching out to grabbing me too and pulling left, right, up, down and center until my eyes land on the glass door and window.

I am now literally in control of actors super sexy and hot ass mother fuckers body in the midst of the spectacle and I decide to play along with it taking his finger licking it and messing his hair up.

I flash a bright smoke showcasing my teeth then make my way down the red carpet my hands are in air and waving it to the sea of massive amounts crowds who are lusting after me.

I slap my ass hard while making a hot sizzle sounds, then make gun signal in my hand and shoot upward and make a weird facial expression as I ditch my wife to have some old fun.

Taking a second I sneak off to the private bathroom of the hotel locking the door a bit and start to undress my self slowly as I lay my cell on to the counter as it records my every movement.

Doing a sexy dance routine just live stream for everyone to see declaring that I am hot ass mess and I need to give myself to some one and he has no idea I am about to make him mine.

I grab my cock starting to pump it creating a heavy undulating movements as I I scream, howl, and shout in pain and pleasure before I cum and I feel the horror of Tom from inside of my body.

“Time to clean up this mess!”

“God! Look at this face “

“I am about to hit some pussy and ass”

“Yeah! I am talking about you bitch”

“Oh Stop! You are embracing this “

“I can feel your heart racing “

“Do not ignore me”

“Or deny my”

“This is my body now “

“Anyone let’s go “

“Hello everyone!”

“Let’s fucking party “

“Hey babe”

“Let’s dance “

“Are you ok Tom?”

“Yeah? By the way”

“Huh?”

“I want a divorce! Sorry babe! Bye”

I call for my limo, calls hotel to set up a room for me and we are off as they park and I am heading in to my hotel room disrobing me of my clothes stripping till my underpants as it all leaves me naked.

I stand in the mirror soon enough I see his reflection looking back at me with anger is ranging on and waving his fist at me so he is getting closer to me as close as the mirror gets closer to me.

He stood stronger in a super height equal to mine, his arms are wide across from me now padding his arms to his body and I love it I can feel the panic in his throat and the pure surge of energy.

“This is impossible! You cannot do this.”

“I am allowed to do anything I want.”

“I chose you “

“I am in control “

“This is my will”

“I will you to obey “

“FUCK You!”

“You will be fucking “

“Some ass”

“You evil creep”

“Evil? Creep? No! No!”

“Oh Tommy! Tom…Tom”

“I am Tom Hardy”

“I am Eddie Brock”

“Asswipe”

“On a deeper level “

“I understand you “

“I am suffering with mental health too”

“I am not as confident as I should be”

“We have to exude it”

“That’s a life”

“Stop falling it “

“Enough fueling it”

“I am your Master now”

“I consume you “

“There is no freedom”

“No free will”

“I love you Tom”

The end

#tom hardy #virtual reality #vr goggles #body possession #the possessed #take over #Master Lawrence Universe

[hwabang]

Break Up + Make Up - Yang Jungwon

Summary: You ended your relationship with Jungwon because HYBE told you to. After a lot of mutual heartbreak and some dangerous situations, you realize this was all a big stupid fucking misunderstanding

Genre: angst + fluff ending

Warnings: fem!reader, idol!reader x idol!jungwon, '03 reader, established relationship, breakup, cursing, arguing, dieting, fainting, starvation, mention of weight, bad eating habits, slight mentions of poor mental health, hospital, mention of sasaeng/crazy engenes lol, reader breaks jungwon's heart but temporarily!, one slight mention of reader not being korean, exes to lovers

Author’s Note: feeling angsty lol. i kinda wanna make "break up + make up" a series for the enhypen members i write for, let me know if you'd be interested!

Word Count: ~ 6k (oop)

NOTICE: (the names used for side characters are fake names, with the exception of the enhypen members. the fake names don't represent any real life characters.)

(gif not mine!)

You and Jungwon have been dating for 4 months now, but you two have been in love with each other for a while. The only thing that had stopped you from dating earlier is the fact that Jungwon's a year younger than you, and neither of you wanted to talk about the feelings until he became an adult in Korea.

Unfortunately, last month some pictures of you and Jungwon on a date were leaked, but your companies decided to go ahead and confirm the relationship since both ENHYPEN and your group were doing quite well right now. You were expecting the hate from crazy fans, but you weren't expecting as much support as you guys were getting. It was an overwhelming amount of love and you two couldn't be more happier.

People who didn't know you and Jungwon would say you two are moving too fast, but the ones who know you well know that you two have been head over heels in love with each other for so long. Sure, your relationship is very established and you two are really serious for a 4 month couple, but who cares? You and Jungwon are taking it at the pace that feels right, and since you two are fully committed to each other and love each other immensely, nothing wrong with moving "too fast".

Currently you were tidying up your dorm with the rest of your members. Today marks the first couple of days you guys get off, and some cleaning of the dorm was much needed right now so that was everyone's first task. After this you were prepared to spend the next 4 off days with your precious Wonnie.

"Hey Y/N," your bandmate Mijeong called out, walking back into the dorm. "Come here?"

You turned the sink off and patted your hands dry then walked into the living room. "Yeah what's up?"

"I just went to pick up our mail and you have a letter from HYBE."

You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion. "HYBE? And it's addressed to me?"

"Yeah, look." She handed the letter to me while sorting through everything else.

"Huh that's weird.. I'll open it later. Anything else for me?"

"Uh.. no more letters, but the front desk said you have a package from (your/country) downstairs; maybe your parents sent you something."

You nodded relaying the information. "Great, I'll go pick it up later. Thanks Mijeong-ah."

You went back to washing and drying the dishes; your last task for today. Once you were done, you took the letter up to your room. Your roommate was doing the laundry so you had a couple minutes to yourself. You sat on your bed and sighed, opening the letter not thinking much of it. Oh how wrong you were.

"Y/N-ssi,

"Hello, this is HYBE Corporation.

We are sending you this letter to inform you that you must end your relationship with our artist, ENHYPEN's Jungwon, as soon as possible.

The relationship being out in the public has decreased ENHYPEN's popularity and put our artists' safety at risk. Furthermore, Jungwon-ssi seems to be losing his focus a lot more after your relationship started. You both have worked very hard to get where you are; we wouldn't want either of your careers being sabotaged because of this relationship.

We kindly request that you end your relationship with him without letting him know that we have asked you to do so. Once you have done so and Jungwon-ssi lets us know, HYBE will personally put out a statement confirming your breakup to the public.

We understand that this might be tough for you to do so. It is solely for the sake of both your group's and ENHYPEN's careers that you all worked so hard for. Idols don't date for this reason; it's quite hard to maintain personal and professional lives. If you start to receive backlash or dangerous threats for the breakup, HYBE Corporation will provide you and your members with top notch security.

Thank you for understanding and for your cooperation.

Best regards,

HYBE Corporation & ENHYPEN Team"

Hot tears were streaming down your face. HYBE wants you to breakup with Jungwon without letting him know they're the reason for the breakup? HYBE were the ones who coerced your company into agreeing to confirm the relationship!

So many things were going through your mind.

You didn't wanna do this; Jungwon would NEVER wanna do this.

However...

You knew ENHYPEN were in danger because of this. Not only did all the past idol-dating horror stories scare you, but you knew haters were sending trucks to HYBE asking them to remove Jungwon from the group.

You can't let Jungwon's dream be sacrificed.

So many things were going through your mind.

But you knew what had to be done.

-

After a text to Jungwon asking him if you could go over to his dorm tonight, you asked the rest of his members to give you and Jungwon the dorm to yourselves for about 30 minutes.

"Oh?" Heeseung exclaimed and you could practically hear the smirk on his face. "Y'all really can't get enough of each other huh?"

You couldn't even crack a fake smile at his joke so you just shook your head, as if he could see it. "No it's not that.. we have something to talk about."

Heeseung abruptly stopped laughing and it felt as if his entire demeanor changed"What's wrong? Did something happen?"

"N-no not really.. I just really need to talk to him."

"Something happened. Talk to me Y/N-yah. What's wrong?"

You couldn't do anything but shake your head. "'Im fine Oppa, really. There's just a conversation Jungwon and I need to have that's why I need the dorm for a bit. Just half an hour.. please?" Without hesitation he agreed to get the members out of the dorm for a bit.

8pm finally came around and you rang the doorbell. The door was swung open and you were greeted by a beaming cheeky smile on his face. "Hi sweetie!"

Immediately he wrapped his arms around your waist and you wrapped yours around his neck, hugging him tightly, knowing this would be the last one.

"H-hey Jungwon-ah.."

He moved to the side as you let yourself in, taking your shoes off and walking into the living room behind him. He looked so excited to see you here.. little did he know you were about to break his fragile heart.

"You know," he started. "I was fully prepared for our mini vacation to start tomorrow, but I'm so happy you came over tonight! Now we have even more time together!"

You gave him a sad smile. "Yeah about that.. that's what we need to talk about."

Still his smile didn't fully fade, he only tilted his head a little. "What happened? Sudden schedule? Plans with your other friends? We can still make a little time for each other baby, no worries."

"No it's not that.. you might wanna sit down."

Now Jungwon was worried, worrying that something really bad happened to you as you hadn't smiled once since you walked through the door. He sat down cautiously right next to you. "What happened princess?" he cooed and held your chin gently. "Who's got my baby so sad, hmm?"

His caring nature brought tears to your eyes but you quickly wiped them away. "Jungwon.. I.. I want to break up."

Time felt like it stopped for Jungwon. It felt as if everything stopped; his breath, his heart, even the trees that were blowing in the breezy wind out his window felt like they were frozen in place.

".. What are you saying baby?" he said slightly chuckling. "If this is one of your pranks again–"

"It's not. I'm serious.. I want to break up."

Jungwon's facial expression was unreadable. Was he angry? Sad? Disappointed? You don't know. But whatever it was, it was far from him being okay with this.

"Okay," Jungwon sighed. He closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and looked back into your eyes. "Let's talk this through. What happened that made you feel like you need to take such a drastic decision?"

Of course you had thought about what your reason was gonna be. You knew Jungwon well enough to know that whatever the reason was, he'd opt to working it out with you versus losing you. There was only one reason that would hurt him enough, reassure him enough that the breakup wasn't a haste decision; a reason that would make him not want to be near you at all which is what needed to happen.

"..I fell out of love with you."

If the feeling of time stopping was what Jungwon felt when you sprung the break up on him, he didn't know what the hell this feeling was now. "Y-you what?? You.. don't love me?"

You were never a good liar; your trembling voice usually gave away your true intentions. How could you blatantly lie to your lover? Just by simply nodding of course.

"Say something Y/N-yah." Jungwon's jaw slightly clenched, you could tell he was holding back an enormous amount of emotions. "Y-you can't just.. you can't just walk in here after 4 happy months and tell me you don't love me anymore!"

Jungwon's shouting never scared you. He couldn't yell at you the way he yelled at his members. You were too precious for him. "W-what do you want me to say, Jungwon.. f-feelings change."

"At least look at me while you break my heart."

You finally looked up at him to see him in a state that clearly meant he's about to break down; hands balled into fists, tears welled up in his beautiful boba eyes, jaw clenched yet somehow a slight pout formed on his lips, said lips quavering with sobs ready to come out.

"I'm looking at you.. d-do you believe me now, huh?" Your voice got a little loud at the end; you were getting defensive. You just wanted this to end. Not the relationship, but this conversation. You didn't want him to fight for you, ask you anymore questions. You just wanted to go home and cry your heart out.

Jungwon shook his head, the tears starting to fall and the quaver of his lips getting rougher. "N-no. I can't believe it. Not when we both waited so long! S-so long to finally be together.. Not when you tell me and show me every single day that you love me, and that you'll always be here for me. N-not when we've talked about a future together! Y/N, fuck, why are you doing this?!"

All his tears rushed out as soon as yours did. You whimpered, not being able to hold the sobs nor the intense eye contact with him. Your eyes went back to your lap where your fingers were playing with the hem of your shirt. "I-it's the truth Jungwon.. Like I said.. feelings change..."

"And yours changed in a couple hours?" he challenged as he stood up from the couch. "You were texting me about our plans tomorrow, telling me you can't wait to spend your days off with the love of your life!"

"I-I know what I said Yang Jungwon!" you screamed, also getting up from your seat. "You don't have to remind me."

His eyes widened. "Y-Yang Jungwon? When did you.. when do you ever call me by my full name?"

"What do you want me to call you, huh? I'm breaking up with you for God's sake!"

"So why are you crying, baby?! You're breaking up with me because you don't love me but you can'd do it without crying??" Jungwon stepped closer to you, grabbing one of your hands and intertwining your fingers. "Something's off.. w-what's going?"

You had to amp your acting skills up; you realized Jungwon knew you too well. "Nothing's going on! God, I'm just an emotional person and you know this! Just because I don't love you anymore doesn't mean I'm not gonna miss having a boyfriend! That's why I'm crying Jungwon; because of the memories and the romantic feelings not because of you!"

Jungwon winced, clearly hurt by your harsh words. You wanted to pull him into you, but you knew damn well you couldn't do it.

"What is it? What made you fall out of love with me? Is it th lack of time? The publicity? Are you still hung over about me being a year younger? God, it's not even that much.. I've been doing my best to not let you feel it, no?"

"Jungwon, it's none of that. I'm just.. n-not into you anymore."

"Bullshit," he spat. "I don't believe it for a second. I know you're fucking into me."

You shook your head, knowing this was going nowhere. Jungwon would fight for your relationship no matter what and you knew it damn well. "W-whatever Jungwon.. that's the only reason I came here. D-don't contact me anymore after this." You turned to walk towards the door. You had to get out of here before you cave in.

You didn't get far, Jungwon immediately grabbing your wrist and turning you towards him. His tears were coming in faster, dribbling down his neck into his pajama shirt. "Is someone making you do this?"

Jackpot.

You tried not to show it in your face; trying to use what you learned from the one and only acting session your company made you do. "What are you on about now."

"Is someone making you do this," he repeated. "Are you being threatened? Were you influenced?.. No fucking way.. tell me HYBE didn't do this..."

You pulled your hand out of his group. "How easy do you think I am, that I'll get influenced by someone else to breakup with you?"

Very, apparently.

"Get it through your head Yang Jungwon; I don't want to be with you anymore."

You turned around again to leave but were immediately pulled into a firm chest. Jungwon wrapped his arms around you as he weeped into your shoulder, his anger now turning into complete sadness.

"Y-Y/N-yah.." he whimpered. "Please.. d-don't leave me.. you were the missing piece in my life that I needed to be 100% happy! You're my lifeline.. h-how can I survive without my lifeline..."

He turned you around to face him, his hands on your shoulders. Your heart was already broken, but the pieces broke into even smaller, microscopic ones once you saw the kicked puppy look on his face with the biggest pout and the biggest teardrops. "I-it's okay if you don't love me anymore. I-I'll do my best to make you fall in love with me again. I'll do whatever I need to, just d-don't go..."

You shouldn't change yourself for anyone Jungwon-ah, you wanted to say.

You wanted to say a lot, mainly how this is all a lie; how you still love him.

But you couldn't.

You shouldn't.

You shoved his hands off of you. "Just let me go Goddammit!"

He was taken aback by your actions and voice volume. "Y/Y/N.."

You pinched the bride of your nose, letting out a sigh that sounded annoyed. "Yang Jungwon, do you hear me? We're. Done. I don't want to be with you anymore." You went to put your shoes on as he followed you with slumped shoulders, a mantra of your name falling from his lips. "Delete my number. This is goodbye Yang Jungwon."

"Y/N!"

You ran out of his dorm and straight into the van that was waiting for you. As the door closed, you let all the tears and sobs out. Your heart cried loudly, you screamed into your hands as you couldn't control your tears.

A tissue box was handed to you. "Here," a soft voice said. You took the tissue boxes without looking up at your manager. "You alright?"

You shook your head. "I can't be Leo... I-I love him so much! I hated telling him that I don't!"

Leo gave you a sad smile, sighing as he started the engine up. "I don't understand why HYBE would do this.. maybe Jungwon really was losing focus.. whatever it is, you'll be okay in the end Y/N."

You got back to the dorms and all of your members sensed something horribly wrong. They followed you to yours and Haydee's shared bedroom and forced the story out of you.

Mijeong smacked the desk she was sitting at out of anger. "Why would HYBE do that?! It makes no sense!"

Your youngest member Jaein was sitting right next to you, letting you cuddle into her as she rubbed your back. "It really doesn't... HYBE can't be that ruthless, right?"

You shrugged, sitting up from your position and looking straight at Haydee. "I know you're good friends with Jake. He'll definitely contact you. He can't know anything about HYBE contacting me, please."

Your prediction turned out right as an hour later, Haydee's phone rang with Jake's name displaying on the bright screen. She went downstairs onto the street to answer the call, not wanting to discuss it near you as it's a fresh wound. "Yeah Jake."

"Yoi~ what the hell is going on?"

'I don't know," Haydee sighed. "How much have you heard from Jungwon?"

"Well, he wouldn't talk at first. When we came back to the dorm he was on the floor in the living room, in like a fetus position and crying a fuck ton. It took some coaxing from Jay for him to tell us that Y/N came over and broke up with him because she doesn't love him anymore.. but that's not the full truth, is it Dee?"

Haydee was conflicted, but girl code first; she knew it well. "Look, I'm not gonna add more fuel to the burning fire.. It's not my place to discuss this with you but whatever Y/N did, she did for a reason."

"She still loves him though right? Just tell me that much so I can comfort him."

"I was told specifically not to tell you jack shit bro."

Jake groaned. "Fine fine.. whatever you or Y/N or anyone says I refuse to believe it. All of us refuse to believe it; no way Y/N's out of love with Jungwon. They're a match made in heaven!"

"And I agree Jake, but we can't really do much besides be there for them."

"Nah you're right.. Uh, Jungwon wanted me to tell you one thing though. It's actually a favor."

"Yeah, what is it?"

"Don't let Y/N forget to take care of herself. We both know.. actually everyone knows, how bad this girl is at taking care of herself. So he just wanted me to tell you and the rest of the girls to take extra care of her."

"Yeah Jake, tell Jungwon and the rest of the guys we'll be keeping an eye out on her. Nothing will get passed us."

And that's where Haydee was wrong. It had been about 15 days since the breakup and so much had changed.

HYBE announced the breakup the same day and since then, the hate towards Jungwon had stopped completely. HYBE stated the reason for the breakup to be conflicting schedules, so neither party would get hate.

Another thing that changed though, was you. You had done a weight check-in today and your managers were shocked to see you lost 10 lbs in two weeks.

"I'm fine Leo," you repeated for the fifth time as he walked behind you into the convenience store. "Stop babying me, you're a year older than me."

"This is literally my job Y/N. Let me do my job."

You rolled your eyes and went to the snack section, picking up a pack of saltine crackers. "Then let me do mine. I'm an idol, I have to watch my weight."

Leo watched as you put your lunch down at the register– if he could even call it a lunch. A pack of saltine crackers, a cup of ice, a zero coke, and a bottle of water. He eyed you as he got the company card out of his wallet. "Shouldn't you grab like, I don't know, an actual lunch item?"

"This is enough," you protested. "I'm not even that hungry. Now stop before I start coming to the convenience store without you or any protection."

With a defeated sigh, Leo payed for your stuff and then grabbed the bag, walking out with you as you two headed back to the company. "How's this enough when all you had for breakfast was coffee? The whole point of me bringing you here was for you to get actual food Y/N.. we're all worried about you. "

"Don't be, I feel fine! I've been so energized since I stopped eating all the food I was eating before."

"That's your fatigue talking. You're gonna end up crashing, I'm telling you."

"I hear you and your worries, but I'm fine. Trust me." And with that, Leo let it go.

Big mistake.

The week after that was the Waterbomb Korea Festival. Because your group was performing, two months prior to the event Jungwon got tickets for all of ENHYPEN so they could come and support you guys. Jungwon was gonna return the tickets, not having the courage to face you, but all of the members insisted that it'd be quite fun to go and enjoy the festival as audience members and not artists for once. So they dragged Jungwon with them.

Jungwon had been so depressed. The past two weeks were a repeat of the same thing; he'd wake up, eat breakfast, go to the company, come back home, shower, eat dinner, talk to fans on We Verse, and then cry looking at videos and pictures he took of you till he'd fall asleep. His members didn't know what to do. They all discussed it and all 6 of them agreed that something about the breakup felt off; no way you fell out of love with Jungwon. 

Jay had even come to see you at your company once. You were pretty close with Jay, him slowly becoming sort of a therapist for you once you two got close as he was quite well versed in helping you through your mental health. He was thinking that maybe you let the voices in your head get to you; maybe you felt you were not enough for Jungwon (which is so far from the truth) hence you broke up with him. But you kept giving Jay the same reason you gave Jungwon until he gave up and left after giving you some sweet words of encouragement. After that Jake, Heeseung, even Jungwon's sister had messaged you but you left all of their notifications untouched.

Jungwon had snagged pretty good seats; not too far from the stage and smack in the middle so they could get a good view of everything. They enjoyed all the acts and performances, having a genuinely good time. All the members were relieved to see Jungwon displaying a sincere smile on his face for the first time in 3 weeks.

Then your group came out and Jungwon felt his heart break all over again. Yes, partly because the breakup and your relationship were fresh wounds. But the main reason he was having a hard time holding it together was because of the way you looked.

Although everything about your outfit, hair, and makeup was perfect that day, Jungwon couldn't help but notice you lost an immense amount of weight. You usually didn't wear revealing clothing as it was out of your comfort zone, but for a festival like Waterbomb, your stylist had to put you in a halter crop top and really short shorts. So Jungwon could see a lot of your skin, and you looked so beautiful.. yet so weak.

And everyone noticed it too. "Is it just me," Niki started, "or does Y/N Noona look sick?"

Jungwon nodded and sighed disappointedly. "Yeah, she looks like she lost a lot of weight–"

"No not that Hyung," Niki interrupted. "I mean, yeah she does look like she lost too much weight but. I mean actually sick. Her face is pale and she's not performing like she usually does... like.. she's gonna faint..."

Jungwon's head snapped to you at the younger's words, now really watching you. And Niki was right, you looked sickly. You were a great performer, so it was definitely odd for you to not be fully doing the moves. Jungwon also noticed you kept looking down a lot, and then noticed you were scrunching your eyes tightly closed while doing so. Were you really going to faint??

Jungwon's question didn't go unanswered for much longer as your group's 3rd song was coming to an end. Jaein had just started singing the very ending of the song when you plopped onto the stage floor, making her scream in the middle of singing. The music stopped, the crowd went from singing and laughing to gasping and murmuring concernedly. 

Jake's eyes widened. "What just happened?! Did Y/N just faint?!"

"I-I think so.." Heeseung responded.

The members (and everyone in the crowd) watched as staff rushed to you, gently picking you up and taking you back stage. Jungwon watched everything happen, completely frozen until he felt a tap on his shoulder. He turned around to see one of your manager's Leo standing there with a concerned look, completely out of breath. 

"Hey man," Leo greeted. "We're gonna take Y/N to the hospital, the ambulance is on the way... D-do you wanna go with her?"

Jungwon frantically nodded. "Y-yeah Hyung, please." He said goodbye to his members and then followed Leo to where you are. They had you laid on the couch with your members surrounding you; some fanning you, some just watching you to see if you'd wake up, and Haydee was walking around looking stressed as she called your family.

Jungwon slowly made his way towards you. Your members nodded and made some room for him to kneel down in front of your unconscious figure. He caressed your cheek with the back of his fingers, trying to hold his tears back the best he could. "Wh-what did you do my baby.." he whimpered to himself.

"Jungwon," the eldest of your group called out to him.

He looked up to see her standing there with your backpack in her hand. "FeiFei Noona, what is it?"

"The ambulance is almost here, our managers arranged a space for us to change her into her regular clothes; these are pretty uncomfortable. Do you want to come with me to help change her?"

"Of course Noona, anything for her." He got up and carefully picked you up bridal style as he followed FeiFei to the empty dressing room. Jungwon couldn't help but notice that you had packed one of his shirts in your bag.

By the time you were dressed the ambulance came and you were put on a stretcher and taken in. Haydee, Leo, and your main manager went with you, along with Jungwon. The rest of your members were so distraught they knew they couldn't perform so they went home.

Once you were admitted to the hospital everyone was just sitting in the waiting room, waiting for any news on you. 

"Any update?" Jake asked as he called Haydee.

"No," she sighed. "The doctor and nurses have been in there with her for almost an hour.. no one has said anything."

"How's Jungwon?"

Haydee looked over at Jungwon, turning her back to him and walking a bit further away so he couldn't hear. "Not good. He's been crying and sobbing. Nothing we say is helping, although Leo is trying hard. I'll call you once we hear anything."

Not too long after, a nurse came out to the waiting room. "Are you all here for Y/N-ssi?" Everyone stood up nodding. "We just transferred her into a room. The doctor is there waiting, you all can follow me."

They walked in to the room you were in and Jungwon gasped. Your face gained some color back but you were hooked up to IVs and the sight made Jungwon wince.

The doctor greeted the four in the room with you. "Ms. Y/N is fine now," he started. "She was heavily malnourished and dehydrated. I checked her charts, and it seems she lost a dangerous amount of weight in the past month. What have her eating habits been like recently?"

And for once Jungwon couldn't answer.. he had no idea what you'd been up to the past three weeks so Leo answered. "Honestly she hasn't really been eating much.. We all try to force her but she doesn't listen. I don't know how she is at home.."

Haydee shook her head. "It's the same thing at home. She drinks juice and then goes about her day. We've gotten into so many arguments with her about this but like our manager said, she doesn't really listen."

Jungwon teared up again hearing this information and looked up to the doctor with broken eyes. "W-when will she wake up?"

"Hopefully soon," the doctor said. "We're administering saline, medicines, and some nutritional vitamins to her through IV so she should wake up soon. I'll leave you all with her for some time."

"Haydee," your main manager called out. "We gotta get you back to the dorm.. I'm sorry but you guys still have to continue with your schedules and you have a fan meet tomorrow morning."

Haydee nodded defeated. "Okay.. let's go then."

Your main manager nodded then turned to Leo. "I've already talked to ENHYPEN's manager; Jungwon is allowed to stay as long as he'd like. You stay until she wakes up, and when Jungwon-ssi wants to go home take him. Call me if she wakes up."

Leo nodded as Haydee and his boss left the room. "Yes Hyung." Once they were gone he came up to Jungwon who was now sat by your bed, playing with the hand that wasn't hooked to machines. He put an encouraging hand on Jungwon's shoulder. "You okay?"

He sniffled and nodded. "I just.. I don't know what to feel.. I-I'm so mad at her but m-myself too..."

"Yeah I get it man.. I know your manager gave the okay for you to stay here as long as you want but my advice? Don't stay too long. Maybe it's selfish of me to say it but I don't want HYBE coming at Y/N again."

Jungwon slowly turned his head to look at Leo with disbelief written all over his face. "What do you mean Hyung.. what do you mean HYBE will come for her again."

Leo sighed, realizing he fucked up. "She'll kill me for telling you, but here." Leo took his phone out and showed Jungwon a picture of the letter HYBE sent you.

The more Jungwon read it the more he seethed with anger. He stood up abruptly. "What? How could HYBE do this?!"

Leo shrugged. "We were confused too, since HYBE were the ones who wanted to confirm your relationship in the first place. Don't be mad at Y/N; understand she did this to save your career."

"Why would I be mad at her?" he shook his head and turned to look at your unconscious figure. He caressed your cheek as a pout formed on his lips. "My baby.. I knew you still loved me.. but you put yourself through so much just for me.." He kissed your forehead before handing Leo his phone back. "I'll be back Hyung.. I've got a phone call to make. Send me that picture please."

Jungwon stepped out of the room to call his manager, accusing him of ruining his relationship but to his surprise, he was also shocked to hear the real reason why you broke up with him. Jungwon then sent the picture to his manager who immediately contacted his higher-ups at HYBE. "I'll call you back Jungwon-ah," he said before hanging up.

Jungwon paced around in front of the hospital room, biting his lips as a way to keep his anger at bay. HYBE did this without telling his manager, without telling him, and for what? And out of nowhere? None of it made sense. As soon as his manager called back Jungwon immediately picked up. "Hyung what did you find out."

"Jungwon.. that letter wasn't sent by HYBE."

He furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. "What? What do you mean? The address, the logo, it's even signed by HYBE!"

"Jungwon look closely at the picture.. the 'H' in the logo is tilted."

Jungwon took the phone off his ear to zoom in on the picture and sure enough, his manager was right. He put the phone back to his ear. "Hyung, I'm so confused. You're right but what does this mean?"

"Someone sent that letter to Y/N pretending to be HYBE to sabotage your relationship"

Jungwon's eyes widened. "What? Who would do such a thing?"

"My guess is a crazy fan? Sasaeng? I'm not sure but HYBE is working on it as we speak. We'll get to the bottom of this. You stay with Y/N and her manager and do not leave the hospital alone. We don't know if anyone is trying to hurt you or Y/N."

Immediately Jungwon went back to your hospital room, relaying this new information to Leo who was equally shocked. The two couldn't do anything about it so they just sat around your hospital room waiting for you to wake up. Jungwon in the mean time was updating his members and his sister about what he had just found out.

Another three hours later, you had slowly opened your eyes. You were quite confused as you looked around to see you were in a hospital room, with machines hooked to you. In the car corner of the room you saw Leo and Jungwon sitting on the couch scrolling through their phones. You didn't know what was going on, so you mustered all the strength you had to call out Jungwon's name hoarsely.

Immediately he looked up and practically chucked his phone on the couch before sprinting over to you. "Y-Y/N! You're awake!" His face lit up with joy and relief as he sat down next to you, taking your free hand and kissing it. "Thank God!"

Leo walked over to you and smiled."How you doing kiddo?"

"I'm fine.. what happened? Weren't we performing today?"

Leo nodded. "You were yeah. Until you fainted on stage."

Your eyes widened. "W-what?! I fainted?"

"The doctor said you were heavily malnourished and dehydrated. I told you right? That you'd end up crashing? You didn't listen now look where we are." Leo shook his head in disappointment before ruffling your hair. "Glad you're awake though. I'm gonna go find the doctor so you guys can have some alone time.. you two really need to talk."

After Leo left you hesitantly looked at Jungwon. "Jungwon.."

He gave you a sad smile as he caressed your hand. "I'm glad you're awake."

You sighed. "I'm sorry Jungwon."

"For which part? The part where you didn't take care of yourself? Or the part where you lied to me and broke up with me because of HYBE?"

You widened your eyes. "H-how did you–"

"What were you thinking princess? Why would you tell me you don't love me? Did you want me to start hating you?"

You slowly nodded. "I-I did what I had to do Jungwon... your life was in risk, your members lives were at risk; your careers were at risk! You worked so hard to get here, I couldn't be selfish and take that from you."

"But you were selfish! You took yourself away from me!" he exclaimed. Jungwon wiped his tears before continuing. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I-I was told not to.."

Jungwon sighed, coming closer to you and he caressed your cheek. "Baby.. Leo Hyung showed me the letter so I contacted my manager who knew nothing of it. Then he talked to HYBE and.. they said they didn't send it."

Your heart stopped. "What? What do you mean?"

"So I spoke to my manager a little earlier.. one of my sasaengs sent that letter to you impersonating HYBE."

"Are you serious?!" you almost yelled. "I ended our relationship because of a sasaeng?!"

Jungwon sadly nodded. "Yeah baby.. But HYBE found her and she's having charges pressed against her for this whole mess. We don't know how she found your address so she's got that against her too."

You sighed taking in all of that information and then you suddenly started crying. You pulled Jungwon to you and wrapped your free arm around him. "I-I'm so sorry Jungwon!"

Your sobs brought tears to his eyes again and he too started crying as he gently hugged you back. "Shh.. it's okay.. you didn't do it on purpose.. you did it to save me and as much as I hate it, I'll always appreciate that baby.." He kissed your forehead before letting go and sitting next to your bed again. "Now let's talk about your health.. why did you do this Y/N-yah.."

You shrugged, not really knowing what to tell him. "I don't really know.. I just, didn't feel lie eating I guess."

He shook his head at your reasoning. "Doesn't matter. Eating is a basic human need.. even if you don't feel like eating you should eat something. And Leo Hyung told me about your "lunches"; you think saltines and juice are enough to fill you up for the day, hmm?" he lightly scolded.

"S-sorry Jungwon-ah.."

He sighed as he felt the tears coming back and he looked at you completely dejected. "Please baby.. promise me you'll never do this again.. Please, just eat.."

You felt so bad for everything you put Jungwon through in the past couple weeks, your heart was breaking more than ever. "Jungwonnie," you cooed. "Come here."

Immediately he caught your drift and stood up to lean over your body and kiss you. You two passionately kissed for a couple seconds before he pulled away and rested his forehead against yours. "Be my girlfriend again Y/N," he sniffed. "Please... be mine forever."

You nodded and pecked his lips shortly. "I love you Jungwon."

Jungwon sighed, missing your voice telling him that. "I know, I know my baby.. and I love you too."

#yall know how hard it is to find sad jungwon gifs #happy virus frfr #enhypen imagines #enhypen reactions #enhypen #enhypen jungwon #yang jungwon #jungwon #jungwon reactions #jungwon imagines

[yevmarie]

Light My Fire | Chapter 2

Masterlist

< Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 >

Plot: having lost everything you are drowned in depression, which had happened to you a year ago. Now you need to struggle with the apocalypse as well with no sparkle in your heart. But there is one man who can light your fire to live.

Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Female Reader

Word count: 1.8k

Pronouns: you, she/her

Warnings:

angst;

mentions of depression;

implied suicidal thoughts;

abuse;

swearing;

smoking (by main character as well);

differences from the main plot may occur;

bad English (not my first language).

If I miss something, please let me know. I hope you enjoy :).

You approached Shane while he was checking his gun, Lori standing in front of him, silently saying something. When she noticed you out of the corner of her eye, her facial expression changed, as if you had caught her in something.

Your relationship with her was an enigma to you. Once your friend distanced herself from you without any explanation. You attributed this to her mental condition; after all, her husband was in a coma, leaving her alone with their little son.

Following your primal belief, you sought to avoid conflict and not come across as a bad person.

“Are you okay with having invested a pile of dough to change yourself but still going down the beaten path? Huh, Y/N?” you asked yourself.

Shane interrupted your thoughts. "I’ll go for Rick. Thank God we haven’t gone too far. Lori and I have settled it."

You stood rooted to the ground. Carl was everything you had, and despite that, you still had feelings for Shane. You weren't prepared to lose him too. But who were you to oppose?

Shane brought you back to reality. "Whatever happens, don’t split up. Lori, Y/N, are your phones still charged?"

You both nodded.

"Good. If anything happens, just run. I’ll call you and find you," he assured, stepping up to Lori and kissing her forehead. Your heart sank. Yes, they were friends, but this move...

"Take care," you told Shane. He looked at you and silently nodded. You turned and went to your car. As you closed the door, the surrounding chatter suddenly became distant. Placing your hands on the steering wheel, you laid your forehead down, feeling your shoulders shake as tears fell.

Footsteps neared your car. Raising your head, you saw Daryl turning back to his car. Perhaps, he wanted to return your cup. You opened the door. Daryl approached.

"Here ya are," he handed you the cup, noticing your tear-streaked face. "Brewed this yourself?" You nodded with a sad smile. "Um, take this too," he handed you a silver Zippo. You thanked him with a smile. Daryl felt his cheeks started blushing. He nodded and hurried back to his car. You closed the door, leaned back, and watched him leave, feeling your body relax as you fell asleep.

---

A dull explosion made you awake, the car slightly shaking from the blast. People were screaming and running. You turned and saw Lori rushing toward you.

"Y/N, please look after Carl."

"What's happening?"

But she had already distanced herself.

"Don’t split up, yeah?" you thought.

Military airplanes flew overhead, causing your ears to clog. "Y/N," Carl's voice barely reached you from inside the car. Opening the door, you sat next to him.

"What's going on?" the boy's voice trembled. Another explosion shook the car. You held Carl close. The drum-like rhythm of explosions echoed in the city. You closed your eyes, trying to hold back tears, but they escaped, grieving for your friend buried in your mind.

---

“Inhale…” the woman’s voice was talking to you calmly. You inhale and hold your breath. “Exhale…” you exhale and hold your breath again. “Well, there you are. This technique is quite simple, isn’t it? And let’s repeat it. Inhale…”

---

Returning to reality, Carl still held you in a hug, soothingly stroking your shoulder. "Y/N, it’s okay, it’s okay" he reassured. He was an intelligent and empathetic child. When Rick told Carl about your mental health issues, he promised to do all but impossible to support and comfort his aunt. And that’s what he did. Nothing extraordinary, just simple hugs, words of support, and a pinch of unconditional child love.

"Thank you, Carl, you've helped me a lot," you said through tears. The car door suddenly opened. “Shane?” you exclaimed.

"We all need to talk," his face filled with concern. Lori was sobbing. You stepped out. Carl followed you glancing between Shane and his mother, puzzled.

“I’m sorry…” the man said.

Everything around you felt like in slow motion.

“Damn it!” you screamed in your thoughts but the face was showing no emotions, they had been sobbed out in the car before. Sitting on the asphalt and leaning on the car, your body shook, breath trembling, and the noise deafening.

“This can't be happening to me. No, not me. I’ll wake up in my cozy bed now, then brew some coffee, go outside to the park, call my mom, and chat with my dad. I’ll go to work. And after the work day, Shane will pick me up. We’ll call Rick. He’ll be glad to invite us over. We’ll buy some expensive and nice wine for Rick and Lori, and a toy for Carl. And after that Shane and I get back home and we’ll get drowned into each other's embraces till the morning. Yes, it will be this way, only this way…”

Your thoughts were interrupted by a silver-haired man in safari clothing talking to Shane.

“We’d like to settle a camp nearby. I know that place well, used to fishing there. Would you like to join us? I think we all need to rest and then come up with a plan. Please don’t take me wrong, there are a lot of children, and some of the families fled without any armor or food. We need to stick together. And I won’t be lying your help would be valuable.”

Shane glanced at Lori, who nodded in agreement. "Good," said the old man.

---

"What’s happening there, Merle?" Daryl inquired, observing an old man conversing with Shane through the rearview mirror.

“Some old fart gatherin’ the group.”

“Got it.”

"Really? Then pack your bag.”

“Why do we need to join ‘em? We’ll tough it out alone.”

“You silly arse. We can clean ‘em up while they sleep and go west then.”

“I see ya got one solution for everything.”

“And I see ya learned nothin’ in your useless life. Want to save our hides, you dork? Go on and talk; your innocent face works better.”

Daryl gasped and headed toward the man.

"Hey, we'd like to join too."

The old man glanced concerningly at Daryl, then at Merle. "I think..."

"We’ve got food and armor," Daryl interrupted, nervously biting his lower lip.

"Okay," the man nodded after a few seconds.

"Thanks," Daryl glanced in your direction, relieved that your eyes hadn’t met. You were occupied with packing your belongings. Daryl awkwardly shuffled away.

---

Several hours passed as your group settled at the camp. You all agreed on the plan for the following day. Some would venture into the city to assess the situation, while others would hunt, understanding the impossibility of entering the city on the first try. A round-the-clock watch was set up, with Shane volunteering to start.

You sat near the campfire with Lori and Carl while they ate. Unable to eat due to food sticking in your throat, you idly played with the zippo Daryl had given you, gazing into emptiness.

Shane approached and settled on a nearby log.

"Carl, please rest. I’ll join soon," Lori said, ensuring Carl had gone into the tent. Shane started telling in great detail. “I’m sorry, I’m not ready for this yet,” Lori interrupted sobbing and then followed her son.

"Go ahead," you rasped dryly, wanting water but almost vomiting the last time you tried to drink it.

"I’m sorry," Shane whispered after finishing his story.

"It’s not your fault," you replied emptily, clicking the lighter in your hand. "I’ll take a walk."

"It's not safe, Y/N," Shane's voice lowered, growing aggressive.

"You know I can stand up for myself," you stepped away.

"You are a pain," he growled, a chill running down your spine.

"Need a painkiller?" you replied sarcastically.

Before you realized, he was already standing next to you, gripping your forearm.

"It hurts," your voice devoid of emotion.

"I'm tired of constantly rescuing you."

"Ironic that you never did it for me. But good for you, Rick is dead. Now you can enjoy a new role."

"Piece of garbage!" Shane said through gritted teeth, pushing you away. Off-balance, you made two steps and walked toward the quarry.

---

“Your shitty plan went tits up, Merle.” Daryl told his brother while he was savoring whiskey from the flask.

“Ya could’ve thought of something better.” Merle sipped and whizzed nastily.

Daryl screwed up his face, took a crossbow, and headed outside.

“Where are ya goin’?”

“Check up the territory”

“Should I hand to?”

“Fuck off, Merle!”

---

Keep holding on

When my brain's ticking like a bomb

Guess the black thoughts

Have come again to get me

You sat on the hill's edge, observing the moon's reflection shimmering on the water's surface while absentmindedly toying with a butterfly knife. Checking its sharpness, you noted that it wasn't the most reliable tool for self-defense.

Suddenly, the silence shattered by rustling plants nearby. You cautiously stood up and headed towards the sound on bended knees. “Here we go,” you thought gulping nervously. A bead of sweat traced its path down your spine. Your breathing grew irregular, louder, prompting you to hold it in. Each passing second seemed to amplify the sound of your racing pulse. Out of the darkness, a crossbow glinted, followed by the silhouette of a well-built man. Realizing escape wouldn't be easy, your blood pressure skyrocketed, and a persistent ringing filled your ears.

That's right

Trigger between my eyes

Please strike

Make it quick now

The man stepped forward. It was Daryl. He lowered the crossbow as he recognized you.

“You fucking idiot!” you yelled, bending over trying to catch your breath. Daryl stepped up. “Sorry, I didn’t mean that seriously. You’ve scared the shit out of me,” you said, wiping sweat from your forehead. Your legs felt weak, and you collapsed back onto the ground where you were sitting earlier. Retrieving a cigarette, you lit it.

“What are you doing here?” Daryl grumbled.

“Just catching my breath, resting early. And you?”

“Nothing much,” Daryl replied, looking a bit embarrassed.

“Hmm,” you hummed with the cigarette between your lips.

Click! “Nice lighter,” you paused. “But a regular one would be handy too.” You offered Daryl the shimmering silver zippo you had.

“There you go. Take it, it's yours,” he said.

You thanked exhaling the burning smoke.

“Wanna keep me company?”

Daryl hesitated for a moment, then sat beside you.

Both of you sat in silence, unsure of what to talk about. You decided to start a conversation somehow.

“What's your brother's name?”

“Made a pass at him?”

You laughed coughing a bit. Daryl grinned subtly in response.

"Merle,” he replied.

“A charming man,” you put on an act pretending to be impressed.

Daryl chuckled softly. “Nobody's ever called him tha’ before.” His voice softened and became more cheerful.

“Pleased to be the first,” you continued, still putting on an act.

Daryl couldn't recognize himself, covering his face with his arms and almost crying from laughter. “Stop it, womaaan!” he said.

You laughed, took another drag of the cigarette, and realized you had momentarily distracted yourself from troubling thoughts.

< Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 >

#daryl dixon #daryl dixon x reader #daryl x reader #daryl dixon / reader #daryl dixon / you #daryl dixon x you #daryl / reader #daryl / you #daryl x you #daryl dixon fanfiction #Daryl dixon series #The Walking Dead #the walking dead series #the walking dead fic #twd #twd fanfiction #twd fanfic #norman reedus #daryl dixon fanfic #twd daryl #daryl dixon x female reader #daryl dixon x y/n

[howlingday]

DADDY ISSUES

"The psychological effects of a strained or absence of a father figure in a relationship on a person's mental health and personal relationships."

===============================

Multi-Faceted Arena of Relationships

Ruby: So, what are you planning to do today, Weiss?

Weiss: Let's see... I have a date with Yatsuhashi later.

Ruby: Wait, I thought you were dating Sun?

Blake: I thought she was dating Neptune.

Yang: Last week, she was hanging out with that Mercury guy.

Weiss: Those didn't work out, but I'm sure that once I find some common ground with him, I'll be able to find the right one in him.

Blake: Will that be before or after you sleep with him?

Weiss: Well, who's to say it doesn't happen during?

===============================

Marrying Daddy

Weiss: So, um... Are you seeing anyone?

Ozpin: Ms. Schnee, as flattered as I am by your advances, you fail to understand the reason for your being here.

Weiss: And that is?

Ozpin: That you've been asking the faculty at Beacon, as well as those visiting our highly regarded academy that same question.

Weiss: I'm keeping ky options open!

Ozpin: And risking your career as a huntress, as well as the careers of others! I'm willing to let you off with a warning so long as you give me your word that you'll put an end to these inappropriate actions.

Weiss: ...Do you know if Ruby's uncle is single?

Ozpin: For fuck's sakes...

===============================

Avoiding Engaging Emotions

Jaune: Hey, Weiss, I was wondering if you wanted to study together later?

Weiss: And drag myself down to your level? Absolutely not.

Jaune: Oh, well, uh... Okay... (Walks away)

Ruby: Geez, Weiss! You didn't have to be so mean!

Weiss: Ruby, I am trying to focus on my career! After Professor Ozpin's "curfew," nobody's willing to get near me for any "outside academic activities" that could "jeopardize my future".

Blake: In other words, you can't sleep with half the school and have another pregnancy scare.

Yang: Yeah, and he's got a point. Besides, it doesn't mean you can't study with the rest of us.

Weiss: Actually, yes. It does. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go to the library. (Walks away)

Ruby: But... But movie night...

Blake: Don't worry about her, Ruby. We can still watch movies together.

===============================

Jaune: Oh! H-Hey, Weiss!

Weiss: Ugh!

Jaune: W-Wait! Hear me out! Listen, if... If you don't want me here, just say the word and I'm gone- BUT... If you let me study next to you, I'll keep quiet the entire time.

Weiss: ...Fine.

Some time later...

Jaune: ...Pfft!

Weiss: Mrrgh!

Jaune: Sorry! Sorry, it's just... I was reading about Nicholas Schnee.

Weiss: ...What's so funny about him?

Jaune: Well, it's... It's kind of stupid, but my dad's name is Nicholas, and your last name is Schnee, and... Like I said, it's pretty stupid.

Weiss: Uh-huh...

Jaune: ...

Weiss: ...What's your dad like?

Jaune: Huh? Oh, uh, y'know, like everybody else's dad.

Weiss: Somehow, I doubt that. My father was a negligent workaholic who constantly did whatever he could to belittle my successes.

Jaune: Oh, uh... Yeah, just like that.

Weiss: Huh?

Jaune: Dad was always busy, so it was just me, my mom, and my sisters. Grew up with lots of girly stuff in my childhood, and, well, Dad was never really happy about that. He'd get mad at Mom for letting me get into it and then he'd start yelling at me when I was doing that girly stuff.

Weiss: What kind of girly stuff?

Jaune: Well, when I was a lot younger, I used to sit with my legs crossed over like this. (Knee-over-knee)

Weiss: Huh. That's...

Jaune: Weird, right? But Dad set me straight, even if it was the only way he'd ever talk to me.

Weiss: My... My Dad would do the same thing, too. I had to be perfect at everything, even on my first try. And when I would do it perfect, he'd never be there to see it. In fact, I remember one day being really sick, and my father never bothered to visit me. My sister would tell me-

Jaune: "He's too busy"?

Weiss: Yes... Exactly.

Jaune: Dads, am I right?

Weiss: For once, I can actually agree with you on that.

Jaune: (Chuckles)

Weiss: (Smiles) Say... Jaune? How old are you, again?

Jaune: I'm seventeen. Why?

Weiss: What a coincidence. So am I.

#rwby #weiss schnee #ruby rose #yang xiao long #blake belladonna #ozpin #jaune arc

[rosewould]

take care; bc

pairing; dom!bang chan x sub, afab!reader

words; 3.5k 

genre; idol!au, smut, fluff, sprinkle of angst

warnings; mc is slightly a tsundere (hopefully not too annoying), references to mc and Chan's casual sexcapades, sappy, just regular missionary but I promise it's fun, unprotected sex

preface; what happens when you take two people with differing love languages and throw 'em together??? Read to find out. This was supposed to be a qau, but I decided to make it a thing because I liked it.

Bang Chan is a dependable man. He has to be with so many people counting on him. First, he had his members to look after. Though it can be stressful, it’s rewarding. He wouldn’t mind doing this for a long time. Then came his juniors. They always come ‘round, equipped with questions and requests for advice. Especially the leaders. He views them as his family as well, so it doesn’t bother him one bit. Guess you could say he’s grown accustomed to this role of his.

So when you came around, he had his mentor cap ready. You weren’t under the same company, but he became aware of your existence from the comparisons. Of course the public would compare. You’re both leaders. You both crafted your lineups yourselves. You both are producers. And lastly, most importantly, you guys are strict on how you and your members uphold morals. If you do something wrong, you should apologize for it and promise to do better.

If anyone knows how much is on your plate, it’s Chan. So of course he reached out, just to let you know to call him if you needed anything.

“That’s very kind. I’m doing pretty good, though.” You reply, kind but still forthright.

“Wait, huh?”

You chuckle and it makes Bang Chan want to groan. People just couldn’t be this productive, this perfect, and be doing “pretty good”. That’s simply not how humans work. Look at your goddamn smile accompanying your perfect laugh.

“I kinda think balancing everything is… enjoyable? I don’t know, that sounds crazy.” You look to be processing your thought since you don’t even believe it yourself. Your eyes wander before you nod. “Yeah, it is enjoyable. I guess I like being busy.”

Bang Chan is still short-circuiting, his head still cocked to the side, brows furrowed with his mouth hung open. After trying and failing to understand, he falls back on “Huh?”

“I know, I think it’s weird too.” You shrug before the corner of your lips quirk up. You look content with the bomb you just dropped on Chan. He doesn’t like to talk about it, but the stress seems neverending. It’s unhealthy at this point. The fact that you could balance all that, with more members as well, and still look and claim to be so calm is beyond him. “Sometimes I feel like I was just built for this lifestyle, you know?” You say, gesturing vaguely before looking at him for confirmation.

Built for being pushed to and beyond your limits with minimal rest, food, and mental health care? Who possibly could be made for that? Subconsciously, Chan came to two different potential conclusions. The first didn’t feel great when it materialized in his brain. 

Maybe you weren’t working as efficiently.

He immediately felt like an asshole for even thinking it, but after days of thinking after he bumped into you, he knew in his heart there was a hidden explanation. So he sat down to talk to you, leader to leader. He told you how he chose his members and asked you how you chose yours. You hum as you think, looking down at the dining room table in your dorm. You splay your hands out on the table.

“Twelve is a lot, and it’s hard to pull off a lineup with that many members and it not feel bloated.” You start, narrowing your eyes as you wrangle your thoughts. “For so long I kept comparing each girl to the concept I was briefed on and being completely lost. I only had five girls. Then I realized I had to stop worrying if they fit the concept perfectly. What matters is if the members complement each other.” You slide your hands together as a visual aid for your explanation.

“I spent hours watching and rewatching the videos of the girls displaying their talents. I got a good feel of what each of my five brought to the group and what was missing. I picked the rest based on what I thought our lineup lacked and from there, I focused on making sure no one stuck out like a sore thumb. Sometimes I even considered removing myself.” You look up from the table as you snort. He meets your eyes with utter captivation written on his face.

“Please continue.” He urges excitedly. 

“Okay, well I realized it was okay for two members to stay in the lineup together even if they were really different. As long as there were enough girls there to complement each of them, therefore balancing everything out. Does this make sense? I feel like I’m all over the place.” Your shoulders slump as doubt tugs at your features.

“Oh, definitely. This is actually pretty impressive,” Because he expected you to half-ass it. Of course you weren’t. He could tell from each video he watched of you. The way you carried yourself. How you spoke. The way you keep your members in line while not seeming the least bit cold. Someone doing a piss poor job would’ve displayed signs of inadequacy, at least a small one. No, you were spotless. 

He could tell through the screen from your confident, captivating smile. It was even more apparent when he saw you in person for the first time. You were a star. You shined brighter than most other idols. You stood taller. You were the definition of promising. When Chan looks at you, he can’t help but want you to stay that way. He’s seen what this industry could do to people, and the thought of it one day taking your smile away… he just didn’t want to witness that.

His eyes followed you as you wandered into the kitchen. You were always up and running around, barely taking a moment to rest. You had frequented his dorm enough to traverse his kitchen no problem.

“Ooh, do you want some dakgalbi? Maybe I can make some kimbap on the side, too.” You look back at him excitedly as you pull out a package of chicken from the fridge. No way you’re a good cook as well. Do you cook for your members?

“Here, let me help.” Chan says, feeling restless watching you. 

“Half of the things you’ve said to me involved the word “help”.” You laugh. He ignores you, already standing next to you in the kitchen. As he chops vegetables, he can't help watching you gather everything you need. So busy.

“At the end of the day do you just collapse into your bed? Not even taking off your clothes or anything-”

“No,” You shout over him, “I take a shower and do my nightly skincare routine. Then I read a book and go to sleep.” You give him a self-satisfied look on your way to set seasonings on the counter. He hadn’t even factored in your flawless skin. That’s a good way to describe you. Lacking flaws.

It reminded him of his second explanation he had yet to explore.

You were lying.

Once the food was finished, you dust your hands off before letting out a deep exhale. “Okay. Time to clean!”

“Absolutely not.” Chan says pushing you out of the kitchen. You protest and fight against him, but there’s no use with those muscles. You huff and cross your arms, watching as he starts putting the ingredients away.

“What, you think I can’t handle a couple of dishes?”

“Yeah.” He says simply, not sparing you a glance as he shelves the spices. You scoff and waltz back into the kitchen.

“I’m not a child, you know.”

“I never said that, it’s just,” Chan sighs, dropping his hands by his sides. “Do you do all the cooking and cleaning at your dorm as well?” He turns toward you as he inquires.

“Yes. It’s a part of my schedule, I try to do it every day.”

“Oh my god!”

“It’s not that big of a deal, I’ve told you so many times I like being busy!”

“So, what, you’re gonna add cooking and cleaning for Stray Kids onto your schedule?” He suggests as a joke but when you shrug, he rolls his eyes. 

“I’m joking. I wanted to cook, so I cooked. It would be rude to leave a mess behind.” You approach him and swipe the pan from his hands. “Now let me clean up after myse-”

“Ah~” Chan lifts a slice of kimbap to your mouth and pops it in. You close your mouth around it awkwardly and gawk at him in disbelief. He swipes the pan back with a smirk. The words you’re saying are a garbled mess so Chan just pushes you away again. “Go sit down and eat. I’ll make you a plate and deal with the mess.”

You clumsily swallow the half-chewed food as you twist yourself around, this time able to successfully resist.

“Hey- You!” You point your finger in his face as you plant yourself directly in front of him. “Stop it!”

“Oh calm down. I promise a little rest won’t hurt you.” He pats your head. What, just because he’s been a leader for longer than you he thinks he can boss you around and tell you how to live?

“You wanna know what I think?” You step forward, not anticipating how close his face would be.

“What’s that, baby girl.”

The name nearly knocks the wind out of you. You falter for a moment, but remain steadfast. “I think you just can’t handle that I function differently. Everyone doesn’t go about their life the same way you do.”

Chan hisses derisively, leaning his head slightly to look down at you. “Is that so?”

“Yes! I don’t need to be coddled, Chan!” Your confidence is back at full volume as you stare back at him. Chan raises his eyebrows before setting the pan on the counter.

“I don’t look to coddle you,” Chan says as he repositions himself at his previous proximity. “I just wanna lighten some of your load.” His voice gets softer as he brings his hand up to brush a piece of hair out of your face. He tucks it behind your ear and his hand lingers longer than you expect. His hands are warm and despite their callouses, inviting. All of a sudden the fire fueling you to glare back at him was weaning, and looking into his eyes didn’t feel as uncomplicated. You blink, mouth fumbling over a rebuttal. What was it you were going to say again?

“Just tell me how I can make things easier for you.” He lowers his voice even further, bringing his face closer to yours. Your noses almost touching.

“I-I don’t need things to be easier. I’m doing just fine, why can’t you accept that?” You ask, genuinely stumped. Chan seems to finally understand why you were so adamant. He shuts his eyes with a sigh.

“Shit, I’m sorry. I’ve been undermining what you’re capable of, haven’t I?” His thumb strokes your cheek and you can’t help but flutter your eyes shut. Your heart is beating so intensely against your chest you fear something may be wrong. “I should’ve been more mindful of how I was making you feel.”

“Yeah, you should’ve.” You say unconvincingly. To your dismay, his warmth is suddenly gone. You open your eyes to see him staring to turn away.

“Since I helped make the mess, I’ll help clean. You can kick me out-”

You grab his arm, pulling him back toward you. He looks at you in confusion. 

“I didn’t say to stop touching me.” It was a sad final attempt at trying to keep your walls raised. When Chan laughs at you, you can’t help but feel piteous. He notices the look on his face and sighs, raising his hands back to your cheeks.

“Was that your sad attempt at asking for attention, baby?” He raises his eyebrows, dark eyes questioning you. You panic, looking away as your cheeks start to feel warm. God– wait, your cheeks. Can he feel how hot they’re getting? You groan, clenching your eyes shut.

“You’re always so confident no matter what, and now you can’t even look at me.” He sounds surprised. He raises your head and you hesitantly open your eyes. You’re greeted with his dimpled smile crinkling his eyes and your overactive heart seemingly freezes at the sight. “I have no problem doing this for you.” He rests his forehead against yours. You can’t deny it anymore. It feels so right. But it wasn’t enough.

“Just this…” You say, voice barely above a whisper. You clear your throat. “And more of it.”

A smile tugs at Chan’s lips. “I think I can manage that.” The next thing you register is his lips on yours. You soften into him, feeling weightless.

You still never admit when you were struggling, but Chan can feel it. You’re a completely different person when he’s inside you. Hell, the moment his skin touches yours you become completely pliant. You make no effort to be in control, instead yielding it all to him. And Chan happily accepts it.

All of your noises are high-pitched, breathy, and soft. You shut your eyes tight while he fucks you. God forbid you open them, it takes a lot of convincing to get you to look at him. It’s a side of you he’s never seen before. One that disappears as quickly as it appears.

Outside of his bedroom you’re still that flawless go-getter with her head held high. The two of you barely talk about your escapades until you ask for it.

“Touch me please,” or something along those lines is all you say, maybe with a grab of Chan’s hand to boot. It doesn’t matter how many times you say it, it makes his day every single time. He knows better than to laugh now. You’re already so self-conscious about asking. If your voice were any quieter when you did, he fears he wouldn’t hear you at all. 

The more time he spends with you, the more he understands why. The reason is still unknown to him but he came to realize you have a hard time opening up. It may be because you don’t like burdening people, it could be something deeper. He didn’t feel the need to pry. It was more than enough to watch you unravel underneath him. 

You were waiting politely on the bed behind him. He smiles softly, resuming his work so he can finish and start your usual routine. With one last click of his mouth he exhales loudly and spins around to face you. He stretches his hands high, loosening up after being in the same position for hours. He sits and waits, knowing you prefer to come to him on your own. So he just rests his hands behind his head with a stupid grin. You take a deep breath before speaking.

“Can you come here?” You murmur, so utterly unaware of the puppy dog eyes you sport each time you ask him for something. You were so fucking cute.

“Of course baby.” When Chan approaches you it’s like you start to magnetize. His proximity draws you closer to him. It’s impossible not to have your hands on him all the time. The moment he grabs you and swings you over his lap, the air changes. He engulfs you in a big, tight hug and you instantly melt. The air you inhale feels fresher. You hug him back and curl your fingers into his shirt. As you nuzzle your head into the crook of his neck you feel completely engrossed. When you closed your eyes, it was like you were floating. 

“I need to be taken care of today.” You gasp against his skin as you circle your arms around him tighter. So tight that Chan can’t pull back to check if he was hearing things. “You what?”

You still don’t pull back, but you wait a beat before repeating yourself. “Please take care of me. I really need it.” 

Chan feels like someone was squeezing his heart. He was having trouble breathing correctly. This was an advancement he couldn’t ruin, so he wordlessly flipped you onto your back. He positions himself in between your legs and captures your lips. You kiss him back with so much passion, more than he’d ever received from you. It was becoming harder to not let on how much your words moved him.

“I’ll take care of you baby, just relax.” Breathes against your lips before slotting his in between them again. You’re already making small noises, sweet gasps and sighs after each kiss. He was scared to say so, but there was no denying how needy you were. It was rubbing off on him.

He reaches down in an attempt to rid you of your sweatpants without disconnecting. He sighs frustratedly when it doesn’t work and pulls away. You whimper at the loss of warmth and he stops to look at you. Your eyes were glassy, lips swollen, brows slanted. It takes you lifting your legs for him to remember what he was doing. Chan doesn’t take his eyes off you when he slides them off, so he almost misses that you have no underwear on. “Fuck,” He swears sharply as his cock throbs. Arousal throngs through him so intensely he thinks he’ll pass out. Then he looks up at your pitiful expression.

“Please.” You ask weakly.

He can’t stop himself anymore. His lips are on you after mere seconds, drinking in all your noises. “I’ll do anything for you.” He manages in the small window of time you’re not completely devouring each other.

He shoves his own sweats as far down as he can without pulling away. Feeling his hot tip brushing against your mound drives you even more mad. You’re buzzing from how much you need to feel him. To feel full and embraced. 

Chan swipes his cock through your folds and lets out a shuttered breath. You’re dripping. He slides in so easily that he’s already fully sheathed inside you the moment he pushes in. “Holy shit…”

You throw your head back and let your mouth drop open. You finally manage to push out a wanton moan after a few seconds of still silence, the two of you letting the pleasure sink in. Chan sounds desperate and filthy when he groans. He’s impossibly hard and stiff inside you. Everything just feels so right it leaves you both wondering why it feels so good this time around. 

You’re so wet and tight around him he can’t help but hiss as he rocks his hips back. By the time he pushes in again both of you are moaning messes. “Fuck, fuck, fuck-” Chan squeezes, finally picking up a steady rhythm. Each time he thrusts into you it’s heavy with an obscene slap and squelch filling both your ears. It’s the perfect amount of pressure to send you reeling, make you curl your toes and buck your hips. You weren’t quiet and breathy anymore. Your moans were loud and full, resonating in your chest and filling the quiet room.

It fuels every languid roll of Chan’s hips. Every time he pulls back, he feels how much you’ve coated his shaft. The cool air hits it and makes him want to stay balls deep inside you forever, surrounded by your warm wetness.

He slides his knees forward, pushing himself further inside you. He pulls back less, instead grinding against you. It was like he read your mind. He was closer now, chest pressed against yours with one of his hand caressing your face. You look up at him. No hesitation or shying away from his gaze. He’s able to look into your eyes as he makes love to you. 

Tears were streaming down your face and he kisses every streak they left behind. Your heart feels like it’s expanding from all the affection. Your moans are becoming more frantic and desperate as you hug him closer to your body. You chant his name between trembling breaths. He shushes you, planting soft kisses on your lips.

“It’s okay, I’ve got you.” He’s putting up a front as if he’s not about to fall apart as well. “Just let go for me.”

You push your tongue inside his mouth, eager to taste him. His tongue massaging yours was exactly what you needed. You whine as your hips jerk against him, dissolving into pure pleasure. You feel dizzy, crying out as you cum around his cock. You tug him by his shirt and he gets the message. He wraps his arms firmly around you, his strong biceps making you feel secure. With a few more lewd moans, Chan is spurting hot bursts of cum into your swollen hole. You shudder against him, thin whines floating from your lips. 

Chan continues to kiss you as you come down, whispering soothing words until your eyes flutter shut. He stops to lean back and look at you. You look so blissful. He always thought you looked calm, but perhaps he didn’t quite know what a calm expression truly looked like on you. He could tell you were about to drift off to sleep. 

“Thank you.” You breathe. He smiles before kissing the tip of your nose. “You don’t need to thank me.” He brushes his thumb over your cheek bone, looking down at you fondly. 

“I’ll always be here to take care of you.”

likes and reblogs are appreciated!

#800 #bang chan #stray kids #kpop #chan #skz #smut #fluff #angst #bang chan smut #stray kids smut #kpop smut #skz smut

[boydepartment]

Hey Jayjay, hope you’re doing well~

I just wanted to make a request for a Jake comfort fic, where he’s comforting reader after they’ve had a break down from holding their emotions in for months and didn’t tell anyone bc they don’t know how to express themselves to people?

Sorry if this doesn’t make any sense I’m not in the best headspace rn. But please don’t feel pressured to do this request if it makes you uncomfortable🫂

ON IT- i started writing this right when i got the request, i love you so much <3 dms always open bb

Condensation- Jake Sim x reader

warnings- mental breakdown, fainting

wc- 600

MASTERLIST

The room was absolutely spinning, and you weren’t drunk or anything. You weren’t high and you weren’t sick. You were overwhelmed. Absolutely everything overstimulated you and you were exhausted. The room seemed to be going a mile a minute and all you wanted was for it to stop. You wanted everything to stop for once. Life was hitting hard, and you didn’t know what to do or who to turn to.

Everything got so much that you didn’t even remember inviting Jake over, when the doorbell rang you stumbled to answer. Once again, not having the mental capacity to even think. You swung open the door and the next thing you knew you blacked out. All the stress and nerves absolutely draining your tired self.

When you woke up you were in your bed, water was on the nightstand, and you took a split second to watch the condensation fall from the glass onto the bedside table. Whoever left it didn’t put a coaster or anything down to protect the wood.

You turned over and felt a weight down on your bed, looking up you saw Jake sitting there on his phone. He looked down at you and popped his headphones out.

“Oh, thank god you’re awake.” He put a hand on your head, “fever? No. cough? Cough?” He was pretty frantic about the state of your physical health. He had no idea it was your mental health that was causing a decline in your physical wellbeing.

“No cough, just exhausted…” You mumbled and rested your head down again.

“Did you go out today or something?” He asked, trying to figure out what was wrong so he could help you. Jake was always very pure at heart, if something was wrong with you, he wanted to be there and help. He would never not go out of his way for you and your wellbeing. That’s why you never told him about how overwhelming your life had gotten recently. You hit a brick wall and how was he supposed to try and fix something that seemed so unfixable?

“Y/n?”

“Huh?” You realized now, you never answered his question, “oh sorry. No, I didn’t go out today.”

“Thinking too much?” Jake suddenly asked. You looked up at him.

“Yeah…” You swallowed hard, feeling that familiar lump in your throat. It hurt badly, trying not to absolutely break down hurt badly.

“You can talk to me, I can’t fix all the mental problems, but I can still help.” Jake said, he held your face softly, “I know it’s really hard though- opening up.”

Finally, the dam broke. You started crying hard. Jake held onto you and let you cry it out. He always knew you had issues with vocally saying how you were feeling. He knew you didn’t want him to worry, even though he was going to worry anyways.

“I-I’m sorry I don’t know what came over me I can’t stop-“You continued to cry and Jake rubbed your back softly and slowly.

“Let it out Y/n… It’s okay. I am right here, I'm not going anywhere.”

You continued to sob until you started to doze off again, all those overwhelming emotions once again took you out. You hadn’t realized how much these past months of bottling your feelings took out of you. You were constantly battling by yourself, and it finally caught up to you.

When you woke up from your post crying nap, Jake made you drink water.

“If you don’t want to talk about it still it’s alright.” Jake said, “I’m still going to be here though. I care about you and I just want you to be alright.”

You looked at him, “I think- I think I want to talk about it.”

#enha #enhypen #enha x reader #enhypen x reader #enha angst #enhypen angst #enhypen x reader angst #enha x reader angst #enha jake #enha jake sim #enhypen jake #enhypen jake sim #enhypen jake x reader #enhypen jake sim x reader #enha jake x reader #enha jake sim x reader #jake sim #jake sim x reader #jake sim imagines #enha jake imagines #enhypen jake imagines #kpop #kpop x reader #kpop imagines #jake sim angst

[my-soupy-brain]

need Ted to take care of me, feeling so low :(

Boy, do I feel this one. I'm with you, friend. This request might be a tad older now - I hope you're feeling better. And if you're not, I hope you do. And if this helps, I'm glad to offer the service. I'm writing this for both of us, all of us, who need some help.

---

Relationship: Ted Lasso x reader

Warnings: Mental health (depression), comfort, care

---

Depression feels like a fucking storm cloud. Just hogging up every corner of your mind with rain. A thick, heavy humidity that just brings sheets of rain.

It matched the London skies, a bit. Which delighted you in a sense. It was easier to stay in bed, on the couch, under blankets, when the sun wasn't shining.

Your eyes were puffy and red from crying. Over what? You're not sure. it doesn't matter. Because that's not how depression works.

Hills and valleys, right? That's life. This was a dark, cloudy valley. So be it.

You hadn't eaten in... well, you don't really remember. A handful of crisps here and there, a piece of bread. Enough to sustain you.

Shower? What the hell is a shower?

You'd spent the weekend like this and then called into work on Monday. It's Tuesday morning, and you just sent an email to Keeley to let her know you still weren't feeling well.

"You sure you're okay, babe?" Keeley texted back worriedly.

"I'll be fine," you answered, throwing your phone on the couch and stumbling back into your bed.

...

At Nelson Road, Ted's big, brown eyes were bunched in worry.

"Keeley? You seen y/n around?"

Keeley shook her head. "She took today off again."

"She okay?"

Keeley shrugged her shoulders gently. "She said she was, but something feels off."

Ted nodded and headed down the hallway, hands in his pockets, head down, thinking, as he walked into his office. Beard was talking to Roy about something, and Ted stared at his phone.

"Ted?"

Ted looked up and tried to listen.

"She's not here again, huh?" Beard said, practically reading his best friend's mind, as always. Ted shook his head.

"No, took today off again. She's been out since Friday. I'm worried."

Ted had enough on his plate to worry about. Your being out of the office shouldn't be one of them. But he missed your chats, your coffee, your bright laugh, your smile.

You're one of the few people around here who really get him. And he likes that about you. Along with your kindness. Your quick wit. How you've listened to his anxieties and been a friend in need.

...

It was mid-afternoon when your phone chimed on the couch. Too far to get it. Who cares.

It chimed again. And again.

Still too far away. No way in hell were you leaving this little cocoon you'd created for yourself.

Ding-dong.

The fucking doorbell? Make 'em ring again. Maybe they'll go away.

Ding-dong. Ding-dong!

Two in a row sounds...aggressive. You pull yourself off your bed, wrapped in your blanket, and shuffle to the door.

The handle turns, and on the other side is a slightly damp Ted Lasso under the pouring London rain with an umbrella.

"Hey, Ted, c'mon in," you say, moving away from the door, leaving it open for him to step through.

Ordinarily, your stomach would be fluttering with him in your space. His woodsy cologne, his soft smile, the way he tucks that one loose tendril of hair back into his mane.

You'd be more embarrassed by the dishes piled in the sink, the records on the floor in disarray, the clothes on the floor strewn from the living room to your bedroom, the piles of papers and books laid haphazardly on the coffee table.

But you don't much care. Not right now.

"Y/N?" Ted asked, stepping into the living room of your flat, his eyes still big and worried.

"Yeah."

"You okay?"

"Nah."

You shuffled toward the couch and sat down. Your messy, unwashed hair in a messy updo, half-up and half-down from not caring. Your tshirt hung off your shoulders, your cheeks a bit hollow and pale from not eating, not seeing the sun.

You stared at the TV, the Netflix banner rotating in front of you, like it's done for hours.

Ted nervously sat on the other end of the couch, afraid to approach you. Not sure what to...

His eyes shot over to you when he heard you gasp. Heavy sobs leaving your chest, your lungs. Almost a hiccup of tears pouring out of you. Your cheeks turned red, the tears fell in hot, heavy, salty drops down your cheeks.

Without a second breath, his arms were around you, tucking you against him, his voice soothing a soft "Shhh" - not to get you to stop crying but to help you calm your breathing.

"Breathe, shh, breathe, darlin'," Ted said quietly, the words rattling in your brain like a loose ping-pong ball.

You let yourself cry, cry, cry. And cry.

Ted's arms wrapped around you. He could feel your wet eyes against his neck, and he closed his eyes and let himself melt against you.

"Darlin'...you wanna talk about it?" he asked gently. "You don't have to, but I'll listen."

You cried some more, and Ted hugged you tighter. If he could squeeze the sadness out of you, he'd try.

He felt your body shake in his arms, under his hands.

His warmth became...a balm.

As you started to quiet, his hands rubbed down your back, tucked your hair behind your ear, his lips against your forehead, not kissing it - though he was tempted.

"It's okay, I'm here. I'll listen, if that's what would help," he offers in his low voice and drawl.

When you pull away, he sees the puffy, red, tired eyes. Despite all the sleep, you still look like you've not rested well in days.

Your lip quivers, you look down. Ted holds your hand.

And it all pours out.

How you feel like a failure at work. How lonely you've been. How sleep never seems to rest you. How incredibly insecure you feel about yourself.

Ted couldn't believe it. He heard the words, and couldn't understand.

Wonderful you.

The way your smile lit up his day. Your playful laugh. How witty you were. How damn generous you were with your time, care, and attention.

He squeezes you tighter to his chest.

As your litany of self-flagellation starts to quiet, he lets you both breathe. His heartbeat against your ear steadies your breath.

"I'mma tell you somethin'," Ted says with a soft voice, his thick drawl evident.

"You're damn good at what you do, at work. You make my job a heckuva lot easier with the press with those releases you put out, and the fires you put out," he adds, his large hand running down your back.

"And I'm sorry you're lonely. But I want to remind ya, you ain't really alone. Not with the family at the club, anyway. We're all here for ya, even if we aren't blood family..."

You nod and sigh.

"And I care about you in more ways than I can express, but we don't gotta talk about that right now..."

Your heart flips a bit at this.

"But you do need to know that your kindness, your gentleness, the way you treat the people around you..."

Ted clears his throat.

"You're one of the best people I've ever met."

Your mouth opens to speak, but he continues.

"My day ain't complete until I see that smile of yours. To know you're smilin' when you're hurtin' like this, well... you're just damn courageous. Add that to the list of amazin' things about ya."

Your lips quirk up slightly.

"You make me laugh. But most importantly, you make people - and me - feel seen. Understood. I ain't never have anyone be so good to me when I'm goin' through my stuff as you have."

You hold Ted a little tighter as his voice breaks. Ted squeezes back.

"I care about ya. And I'm not gonna let you sink with this, ya hear me? I'm here, and I'm gonna help ya like you've helped me."

When he feels you nod he looks down at you and smiles. Your eyes are tired, bleary, and your body feels like it ran a marathon.

"Why don't we get you to bed?"

You nod weakly as he helps you up to your room. Once you're stretched out on the mattress, your eyes practically fall shut with lead weights. Sleep. Finally.

...

In the morning, your eyes blink open. Your depression hasn't vanished but your heart admittedly feels lighter. And you can breathe a little easier.

As you come awake, you notice the clothes in your room put away, or folded on your chair.

The bathroom is tidied.

When you step into the living room, you can see the kitchen has been cleaned, and the dishes done. Your records are put away. Everything orderly. Tidy.

And a sleeping, soft-haired Ted Lasso on your couch, in an undershirt and his sweatpants, snoozing away with the remote in his hand.

He stayed. He stayed on all night. Taking care of you.

You decide to shower - finally. Another thing put off too long. And it feels good to wash away the sadness down the drain a bit more. When you change back into cozy clothes, you see Ted is still snoring softly.

A neatly folded throw blanket gets unfolded.

You slide in front of Ted on the couch, who doesn't wake, but instinctively moves his arm over you to pull you to him. You know he can't hear you, but you whisper anyway.

"Thank you, Teddy."

Behind you, Ted's lips tilt up in a soft smile.

---

Well, I'm crying. How about y'all? I've been in a not great place lately and sometimes I wonder if writing these little stories of comfort are good for me or bad for me because I lack it in my own life? But I decided it was comfortable. Something calming to read when our brains feel like thunderstorms. Thanks for the prompt, friend. And hope you're feeling better. xoxo

#ted lasso x reader #ted lasso fanfic #ted lasso fanfiction #ted lasso fluff #ted lasso x you #ted lasso comfort

[mysterious-moonstruck-musings]

Destiny & Deliverance: Chapter 20

Destiny & Deliverance Masterlist ||| Dieter Bravo X OFC Smut & Language- Minors DNI New as of 9/11/2023

SUPPORT YOUR CREATORS. REBLOGGING & COMMENTS ARE APPRECIATED.

Series Rating: Explicit (18+)

Series Summary: Natalia Cohen is experiencing major life changes, beginning with leaving an emotionally abusive husband. She is learning how to navigate life on her own while dealing with high functioning anxiety, depression, and mild PTSD. Everything is looking up for her. She is a highly respected consultant for a major LA firm, has her best friend, Lauren, by her side, and is on her path to healing. Everything changes when she meets a handsome and broken stranger on a work trip. He turns out to be a well-known actor, with a heart-breaking past. They quickly develop a connection that will forever alter their lives. 

Warnings: Themes dealing with mental health, emotional trauma, alcohol use, and discussions about suicide. There will be fluff, tears, spicy language, and smut. This will be a slow burn type of story. Read at your own risk.

Chapter Quote: "I'll do whatever it takes to make you happy."

My entire morning was dragging after finding out about the TMZ article and Instagram post. I could feel the staff's eyes on me and hear the whispers. Everyone knew about it. Once I had a minute to myself, I sent Dieter a text about everything. That was two hours ago, and he still hadn’t answered. I had a feeling he was dealing with a shit storm of epic proportions. The longer I went without hearing from him, the more anxious I felt.

As my final meeting was coming to an end, I saw a notification pop up on my phone. Normally I wouldn’t check my phone during a meeting, but I needed to hear from him.

DIETER: Sorry it took me so long to respond. This morning has been crazy. You want to come over to my house when you leave work? I’m meeting with my manager and publicist.

ME: Yeah, I’ll come straight there.

DIETER: Just a head’s up... TMZ is about to post an update. They have info on you. They are refusing to keep it under wraps. We tried everything. I’m sorry.

I sighed heavily and let out a quiet “fuck” under my breath. Everyone sitting near me looked in my direction. Aubrey had heard it too, but she continued speaking as she gave me a concerned look. I opened the browser on my phone and hit refresh on the article. There were multiple updates posted since earlier this morning. Several ‘sources’ had indicated that Dieter was under the influence of some unknown substance during the confrontation, which they said was related to concerns over his current relationship. They had also added a screen shot of this morning's Instagram post. Another ‘source’ raised concerns about his current mental health status due to his unusual behavior the last few months.

I squeezed the bridge of my nose where a deep throb was forming. This was so ridiculous and blown out of proportion. Who were they even talking with to get this information? I hit refresh again. Sure enough, there was a new update. They had my picture from the company website along with all sorts of details about me, including where I worked. I exhaled slowly as I leaned back in my seat. Aubrey was just wrapping up the meeting. While everyone filed out of the conference room, she and Kerrie walked over noticing that I was upset. When they asked what was going on, I didn’t say anything. I unlocked my phone and handed it to Aubrey.

Aubrey’s eyes grew wide as she handed the phone to Kerrie.

“Wow. That didn’t take long, huh?”

“Where are they getting this information? It’s not even accurate.”

“There is no telling,” Kerrie said as she returned my phone.

“I should probably go before the paparazzi show up here.”

I quickly walked back to my office to gather my things, then headed out the back door toward my car. I noticed there were already a couple of people across the street milling around with cameras. I kept my head down, walking in the opposite direction toward where I parked. I managed to make it out of there without being noticed.

I arrived at Dieter’s a short time later, without incident. When I keyed into the front door, I could hear voices coming from the kitchen. I paused to take a few deep breaths to calm my nerves.

“This is fucking ridiculous. Where are they getting their information? Someone that was there with Anna has to be feeding it to them.”

A woman’s voice spoke up, “D., you were yelling. I’m sure anyone seated around you could have figured out what it was about.”

“Yeah, but what about these sources? It’s all total bullshit. I swear, it sounds like Ann...”

I sat my bags down on the couch before walking into the kitchen as Dieter was speaking. He was leaning against the counter, until he caught sight of me. He stopped mid sentence, walking over to hug me tightly and immediately started apologizing.

“Stop apologizing. It’s fine. I’m ok.”

He pulled away as he moved his hand to cup my face. He gave me a questioning look, trying to decide if I was being honest or not. He seemed satisfied with what he saw before leaning in to give me a quick kiss on the lips. He reached down to grab my hand and led me further into the kitchen to where the man and woman were sitting at the kitchen table. He then introduced me to his publicist, Elaine, and his manager, Ty.

Elaine was probably in her late forties. She had blonde hair swept up into a neat bun. She was dressed business casual, but there was something elegant and genial about her. Ty seemed to be around the same age. He had dark hair with a hipster vibe about him. His face was very smug and judgy. Something about him was already rubbing me the wrong way.

As Dieter introduced us, Elaine gave me a warm smile and shook my hand. Ty on the other hand, looked me up and down before saying, “I would love to say I’ve heard a lot about you, but he has told us absolutely nothing before today.” He followed that statement with a tight smile before turning his gaze to Dieter in an admonishing way.

“That’s not accurate. I told you about her a long time ago. I just didn’t share intimate details because my personal life is my business.”

“Yeah, until it’s not,” Ty shot back at him.

Elaine jumped in, “Ok guys, let’s not argue. Let’s just figure out how we’re going to deal with this, please.”

“D., I’ve got to ask… you swear you're not using again? Be honest. We can’t help if we don’t know.”

Ty glanced over at me as he spoke. Almost like he wanted to see my reaction.

“I’m sorry, I probably shouldn’t have asked that in front of your lady,” he added.

My eyes were focused on Ty. I could feel the intense look forming on my face. I knitted my brows together and tilted my head slightly as I tried to read his body language. That was exactly his intention. Was he testing us or just trying to be an ass?

“It’s fine, Ty. She already knows everything,” Dieter said as he grabbed my hand and gave it a squeeze. He could sense that I was on edge with this guy. He gave me a comforting smile before turning back to Ty.

“I can’t believe you’re really asking me that. I’m completely clean. I didn’t even have any alcohol to drink last night. Neither of us did.”

“You’ve been so secretive lately and haven’t really been in touch with us unless you have to be. I’m just making sure. We don’t know what you’ve been up to,” Ty replied.

“I’ve been on a fucking break. Here. Staying out of trouble like you told me to do.”

I was starting to get annoyed with Ty’s line of questioning. He was being very negative. I felt the need to say something.

“For what it’s worth, I can vouch for him. He’s been working really hard at getting his shit together and he’s been doing great. Truly. We’re together the majority of the time, so I would know if he was doing something like that.”

“I’m sorry, what was your name again?” Ty asked. I narrowed my eyes at him in response. He waved his hands and shook his head in a way that said ‘never mind’ before continuing, “Look, I don’t know you. No offense, but for all I know you could be feeding him lines of coke off those pert tits of yours all the while telling us everything is hunky-dory.”

I had to bite my tongue. I nodded my head as I gave him a tight smile and exhaled loudly. Dieter braced for my response, but I didn’t give one. I wasn’t really sure how to handle this situation.

Elaine interjected, “Ok, that’s enough Ty. Stop being a dick.” Ty gave her a sarcastic smile before leaning back into his seat and crossing his arms.

“Look D., I can tell by looking at you that you’re clean. Don’t listen to him,” she added.

I turned to go grab my laptop and phone off of the couch, then walked toward the back door. Dieter gave me a questioning look. I couldn’t stay in here with this guy for another minute.

“I’m gonna go sit out here and work until you're done.”

“You don’t have to do that. You’re in my life now. I don’t mind if you're involved in these discussions.”

“I’m not so sure that’s a good idea.” I raised my brows at him. He knew what I was saying. I was going to lose it on this guy if I stayed. He gave me a tight nod in understanding.

I exited to the back yard and walked over to sit under the canopy of the rounded daybed to avoid the afternoon sun. I propped myself up on several outdoor pillows and stretched my legs out before getting back to work on my laptop. It was hard to focus given the day’s events. My thoughts were wandering as were my eyes. I couldn’t help glancing toward the glass doors. I could make out Dieter’s dark figure pacing around the kitchen, gesturing with his arms as he talked. Based on his mannerisms, he seemed frustrated. I felt that too.

I wasn’t sure how much time passed before the back door opened. Dieter came out carrying a takeout container and two bottles of water. He sat everything on a nearby table before crawling up the daybed toward my right side. I slid my laptop off to the left, giving him space to hover above the right side of my body as he leaned in for a lingering kiss. He pulled back slightly as his eyes roamed over my face.

“Lunch is here. Gotta make sure you don’t get hangry.” I chuckled.

“Thank you. How is it going in there?” He sighed as he sank down to lay his head on my chest. His right arm reached around and hugged me tightly.

“It’s going. I think we’ve settled on releasing a statement. Elaine is drafting it now. I’m not cool with people thinking I was under the influence. That’s the part that bothers me the most, aside from them posting all the details about you, obviously.”

“Can I ask you about that Instagram post?” He groaned.

“I’m sorry. I should’ve talked to you before I did that. I was hell-bent on making a point.”

He raised his head to look at me. He had a fierce look in his eyes, “I meant it though. I don’t need anyone but you. You’re kinda it for me and I don’t care who knows. They can all fuck off if they have a problem with it. I hope you’re not mad about it.”

“I’m not mad, but a heads up would’ve been helpful. I had to find all this stuff out from my assistant and boss as soon as I walked into the office this morning. Under normal circumstances, I probably would’ve found it to be a turn on, actually. But, the whole public side of everything just adds a weird layer to it, you know what I mean?”

“Shit, mi vida, I’m sorry. I really didn’t think that through. It was impulsive. I shouldn’t have done it.”

He scooted to sit upright, then pulled me into a hug. I nuzzled into the crook of his neck while he pressed a kiss to the top of my head. He began to run his fingers through the back of my hair.

“I’ve never been in an actual relationship, so I’m probably gonna fuck up… a lot. I’m asking for a little grace in advance because I’m not really sure how to navigate all this. But... I’ll do whatever it takes to make you happy.”

I pulled away, reaching to cup his cheek as our eyes met.

“We’ll figure it out together. You just need to make sure you’re communicating your thoughts and feelings with me, ok?”

He shook his head in agreement before reaching to grab my hand that was resting on his cheek. He held it as he turned to kiss the palm. Then he leaned forward to kiss me on the lips. His tongue quickly found its way into my mouth for a moment. He pulled away, giving me a deep gaze. His eyes were now hooded with desire.

“I better get back in here before Ty comes looking for me.”

“I don’t think Ty is a fan of me.”

“Ty is a dick. He’s also friends with Anna, so there’s no telling what’s going on in his head.”

“Oh, is that gonna be a problem?”

“Possibly. We’ll see.”

I gave him a concerned look. He responded with a tight small and raised eyebrows before moving to get up and walk back toward the house. As I watched him, my eyes were drawn to the two silhouettes in the kitchen window. Elaine and Ty had been watching us.

I suddenly felt like our private moment had been violated. Then again, I should probably get used to that. The quiet world we had been living in was quickly crumbling around us. I had a sinking feeling in my gut that we were about to be tested. My only hope was that we could handle it.

I moved over to the table with my laptop so that I could eat as I continued to work. However, that was soon interrupted by my cell phone ringing. It was Lauren calling. She must have finally gotten wind of what was going on. As soon as I answered, she was in full interrogation mode.

“What the actual fuck is going on? What is all this stuff on TMZ? And that Instagram post? What the hell happened in Sonoma?”

I quickly filled her in on all the details as I nibbled at my lunch. I could feel my chest tightening as I relayed the events from the previous night.

“Well, I’m happy you both finally stood up to Anna. She is such a bitch. I can’t believe she said that shit. It’s so fucked up. It’s almost like she was trying to get that kind of reaction out of him.”

“Oh, I’m fairly certain that was the exact reaction she was shooting for. She knows how to push his buttons, unfortunately.”

“Should we be concerned about his reaction? He’s never been like that before, right?”

“Not that I’ve seen. I’d be lying if I said it didn’t concern me a little. He wasn’t responding to me initially, but I think he was just trying to focus on staying calm.”

“Yeah, hopefully that’s all it was.”

Lauren and I ended our conversation after that with promises for the two of us to get together soon. It felt like we hadn’t spent any quality friend time together in ages, and I hated that. She had seemed less engaged lately, blaming it on being short staffed at the shop. I briefly found myself wondering if she had something going on that she wasn’t sharing. It would be unusual for her to keep something from me though. I wasn’t sure if I had the mental capacity to think about that too much at the moment, so I dismissed the thought.

Soon after hanging up with Lauren, Aubrey called to check in and see how I was doing. She told me to take the following day off to try and relax after the madness of today. She also told me to work from home for the next little bit until things calmed down, noting that guys with cameras were hanging around the building. All I could do was apologize. I felt awful that my place of employment was having to deal with this mess too, but she was having none of it.

“Talia, after what I saw in here with you two yesterday, I can’t bring myself to care. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you that happy or content. It is what it is. We’ll handle it.”

I could feel myself getting a little emotional. Tears started to form in the corners of my eyes. She was always more supportive of me than she needed to be. I had to take a moment to steady my voice before responding.

“Thank you. I appreciate it. Hopefully it will blow over quickly.”

After hanging up with Aubrey, I sat staring at my laptop, completely disassociating for a time, feeling like my mind needed a break. I was soon brought back to reality by the sound of footsteps. When I glanced up, I was greeted by Elaine’s approaching smile.

“Do you mind if I join you for a few minutes? Dieter and Ty are on a conference call with the studio. I don’t want to be in on that one if I can help it.”

“Uhh, yeah, sure. Have a seat,” I motioned to the seat next to me as I moved the empty food container out of the way.

She sat down beside me, still smiling before she continued, “You work for Aubrey, right?”

My head snapped back toward her, eyes widened in surprise.

“Yeah…how did you…”

“We have friends in common, so we’ve spent a lot of time together. I didn’t realize who you were until I read that article. I’ve heard her say a lot of really good things about you.”

“Oh well, small world.” I gave a timid laugh. I wasn’t sure where this was going.

“You know, I was with Dieter during a few meetings in New York. He seemed different, even then. I’m pretty sure he was enamored with you the moment you met.”

I couldn’t help the look of disbelief that came across my face, “I doubt that.”

“I’m serious. I mean, he’d been trying to straighten his life out for some time, but something changed after that trip. He seemed a lot more focused and determined. I think that had a lot to do with you.”

I couldn’t help the half smile that crept across my face. If I was honest, I think I was probably enamored with him before we even said a word to each other that first night at the bar.

“I’ve been working with Dieter since the beginning, and I’ve never seen him like this with anyone. I can see that he’s in love with you. I think you’re good for him. So, ignore anything Ty says. He’s blind and also a dick. If you need to throw some of that sass at him that I’ve heard so much about, do it. He needs to be put in his place every once in a while.”

I chuckled. Of course, Aubrey had mentioned that. It was the thing she loved most about me. I could always say what she couldn’t. As far as Elaine was concerned, she was definitely earning some points in my book. I felt like she was being sincere and meant what she was saying. I was happy to find that Dieter had at least one decent person on his side.

“Thank you. I probably needed to hear that. I’m happy he has you. Everyone else I’ve met so far, aside from his family… I’ve just not been impressed. I can understand why he feels like he doesn't have enough support.”

“It’s not the easiest industry to work in. Especially when you have things going on like he does. I’m happy he found someone from the outside that he can trust.”

We were interrupted by Dieter sticking his head out the back door to announce they were off the call. I decided to give up on work for the day since I couldn’t concentrate and had made zero progress. I gathered up all of my things and followed Elaine inside. Elaine and Ty didn’t stay much longer after that, thankfully.

Dieter made a point to set his phone to ‘do not disturb’ after they left. He was over it all and looked exhausted. He flopped down on the couch. I followed, squeezing in between him and the back of it, cuddling into his side. He wrapped his arms around me and rested his chin on my head. Both of us sat in silence for some time before he spoke up.

“I’ve been asked to go see my therapist tomorrow. I’m a little pissed that Ty has no confidence in me.”

“How involved is he with that stuff?”

“Not really that involved. He just likes to make sure I’m going regularly. He doesn’t know the details of anything.”

“Well, maybe it's not a bad idea. This week has been a lot for you. It couldn’t hurt. I can take you if you want. Aubrey told me to take tomorrow off. I can pop in to visit Lauren at the shop while you’re there.”

“Yeah, sure. I think I’d like that.”

We spent the rest of the evening on the couch together catching up on some of our shows and enjoying each other’s company. It was a nice end to the day given how it had started. It was exactly what we needed to recover from the drama.

When the alarm went off at 7AM the next morning, Dieter was not there. I sighed when my fingers met with the cold sheets on his side of the bed. As I lay wondering how long he had been awake, he came walking into the room wearing nothing but gym shorts and carrying a cup of coffee. He handed it over to me as I sat up.

“Despierta, bella durmiente.”

I squinted at him in confusion, “What?”

“Wake up, sleeping beauty,” he repeated in English with a smirk.

“I don’t know about beauty. I’m pretty sure I look like a hot mess.”

I could tell my hair was sticking up in every direction after having Dieter’s hands tangled in it for an extended time the previous night. Even though we were both worn out, we still had the need to partake in some stress relieving activities before sleep took us. It was becoming part of our nightly routine at this point.

He rolled his eyes at me, “Whatever you say, mi amor.”

I smiled at his response. I understood that pet name.

“I happen to like the wild sex hair look, it’s a good reminder of our late night activities,” he added with a playful smile and a wink before walking into his closet.

“I probably need to run to my house to grab some clothes.”

“I should just give you space in my closet so you have some things here for days like this.”

He walked out and threw one of his band t-shirts at me to wear. I raised an eyebrow at him.

“Is that right? Are we those people now?” I huffed out a laugh.

“Just trying to make your life a little easier babe,” he replied with a flirty grin.

“I guess this means I shouldn’t make you live out of a gym bag at my place anymore then.”

I gave him a teasing look as I took another sip of my coffee.

“I mean, it would save me from all the wrinkles and it’s the polite thing to do.”

He shrugged as he sat down on the bed beside me with a toothy smile on his face. I reached up to slide my hand around to the back of his neck, pulling him in for a deep kiss. He briefly paused to take the coffee mug out of my other hand and sat it on the nightstand. Then, he lifted the comforter and crawled underneath it, hovering above my naked body to settle in between my thighs.

As he kissed down the crook of my neck, he reached down to my folds, rubbing gently. He groaned when he felt how wet I already was for him. He inserted two fingers painfully slow as his thumb found the bundle of nerves at my center. His touch caused a sudden jolt of heat to radiate through me. I arched up toward his mouth, which had found its way to my breast. My hands twisted in his curls as he kissed and sucked every inch of me that he had access to, causing me to climax quickly. It was amazing how well he could work my body into a frenzy. I didn’t understand it, but I welcomed it without hesitation every time.

He continued to shower me with soft caresses and kisses until I came down from my high. My immediate response was to reach for his shorts and shove them down his hips far enough to release the hardness I could feel pressing against me. As soon as he was free, I lined him up with my entrance. He responded by slowly sinking into me for the first few thrusts. He abruptly switched to hard thrusts in, all the way to the hilt, but pulled out ever so slowly. With each thrust in, I could feel my muscles quiver slightly. Ready to be taken over the edge again. A small whimper escaped my mouth every time he slammed into me. This pace was maddening, and he knew it.

“Fuck, I’m so close. Stop teasing me. Please,” I managed to cry out between moans.

“What do you need, mi amor. Tell me.”

I could feel his warm breath against my ear as he spoke in a low, sensual tone.

“Faster… please.”

He acquiesced by gradually increasing speed, but still thrusting just as hard. It didn’t take long after that. I quickly came undone around him. He followed soon after, burying his face into my neck. Muffling the low grunts that were escaping his lips.

He hovered above me with his head leaning down toward my chest for several minutes, trying to catch his breath. When he raised it to look at me, I reached for his face and ran my thumb down his plump bottom lip as we looked into each other's eyes. Taking in the shared emotions of the moment. Our time together only seemed to be getting more passionate. It was a miracle to me that we could handle it. I took that as a testament to how much we had both evolved emotionally.

“We really should get in the shower, or else I’m gonna be late.”

I nodded in agreement before giving him one last kiss. He pulled himself out of me with a small grunt, moving to get up. He discarded his shorts on the floor before he walked toward the bathroom. I followed behind to join him. Showering together was becoming pretty routine at this point too. Any chance we got for bonding time, we took full advantage of.

We both had to rush to get ready so that he wasn’t late for his appointment. I didn’t have time to stop and get fresh clothes, so I ended up wearing my skinny jeans from the day before with his t-shirt. Luckily, I had a spare pair of comfy sneakers stowed away in my car.

He was quiet on the way to his appointment, seeming somewhat anxious. He had his right arm propped on the passenger side door with his hand fisted under his chin as he looked out the window. His left hand sat on his thigh while his thumb rubbed back and forth against the other four digits non-stop. I reached over to grab his left hand, entwining our fingers together, hoping it would help calm him. I wasn’t sure that it did.

I pulled up to the front door of his therapist office to drop him off. He leaned in and gave me a quick kiss before exiting the vehicle. I really hoped his session went ok. I wasn’t sure how much more he could handle this week.

After dropping him off, I made my way over to Lauren’s shop. I needed to pick up some supplies, but also wanted to visit with her if she wasn’t too busy. However, when I got there, I was informed that she was taking the day off because she wasn’t feeling well. I found that to be odd. I tried calling her as I wandered down the painting supply aisles. She didn’t answer. I sent her a quick text.

ME: Hey, stopped by to see you and they said you’re out sick. You ok? Need anything?

I didn’t get an immediate response back. Maybe she was asleep? Weird.

I continued browsing for another twenty minutes or so. Finally, my phone pinged.

LAUREN: No, I’m good. Just sleeping it off.

That’s it. Nothing else. Typically, she tended to overshare the gory details. Something had to be going on with her. I felt like I needed to talk to her about it.

I gathered up the remaining items that I needed, then headed toward the checkout counter. I still had some time to kill before going to pick Dieter up, so I decided to run by his favorite smoothie place to pick something up for us. When I got there, it was fairly empty. However, I could feel eyes on me as I stood in line. I glanced around and noticed a couple of girls sitting in a booth looking my way like they recognized me. Geez. I felt like I needed to resort to wearing a hat and sunglasses like Dieter often did. I made a point to turn away from them so they couldn’t see my face. Luckily, I got our order fairly quickly after that and hightailed it back to my car.

I made my way back toward Dieter’s therapist office. I managed to find a parking spot nearby to wait. He still had about ten minutes left. To kill some time, I pulled out my phone to scroll through social media. As soon as I opened the app, I checked the one message alert that popped up. It was from Kerrie. She shared a picture of me at the smoothie shop that had just been posted by a fan account. There was a second picture of Dieter wearing the same t-shirt at some point in time. So they take inventory of his clothing too? And I had literally just left the place.

“Fucking hell. This is so ridiculous.”

I shook my head, closing the app without reading any of the comments. I didn’t want to know what they had to say. Just as I threw my phone down on the middle console, I saw Dieter walking out of the building, briefly stopping to pull out his phone. I assumed to check in on where I was. I quickly pulled out of the parking spot to meet him.

He had an irritated scowl on his face as he got into the car and shut the door a little harder than necessary. I stuck his smoothie in front of his face, and he softened some as he took it from me. He turned, giving me a small smile before sticking the straw in his mouth. I took a minute to pull out onto the main road before I spoke, “I’m almost afraid to ask, but did everything go ok?”

He was quiet for a time as he continued to work on his smoothie. I could tell he was thinking about how to respond.

“He wants to make some adjustments to my medication. The med provider agreed, so I’ve gotta go pick up some prescriptions.”

“Why does he want to do that?”

“Because I’m still having trouble sleeping and the anxiety is getting worse. They’re trying a different sleeping pill and different dosage amounts on the other stuff. I know it’s just because I’m leaving to film soon. It’s got me a little amped up. I really don’t wanna be dealing with medication changes on top of that. It tends to mess with me until I adjust.”

I didn’t really know what to say. I reached over to grab his hand in comfort. He spoke up again, directing me to one of the local pharmacies so he could pick up his prescriptions. I parked and started to grab my purse, but he told me I could wait in the car. Before he got out, he grabbed his hat, sunglasses, and earbuds. His ultimate “don’t talk to me” look. He reached in for his drink before shutting the door. I watched him walk toward the main entrance with his head down. He looked defeated and I hated it for him. He still had a long road ahead of him.

It took a while before his prescription was ready since they had just called it in. He finally came shuffling out the doors forty-five minutes after he went in. He was immediately approached by someone shoving a camera in his face. I could tell he was annoyed, but still smiled and chatted with the guy as he walked. I assumed it was paparazzi since they were clearly recording the entire interaction. When Dieter got to the car and opened the door, I could hear the guy yelling my name and asking how I was today. I mustered a small smile and wave as Dieter shut the door.

“I guess our quiet little bubble has burst, huh?”

“Yep. Welcome to my world.”

He gave me an annoyed look as he put his seatbelt on. I backed out as the guy continued to film. We were both beyond ready to go home.

During our remaining two weeks together, we spent as much time at home as we could. Dieter enlisted his assistant, Rylee, to pick things up for us as needed. She was a sweet girl and seemed like a genuinely good person, which I was thankful for. She had a lot of spunk and a fun personality, with brightly colored hair to match. He was going to need that while he was away. He was going to need all the help and positivity he could get.

As his departure date neared, he was clearly getting more anxious. He tried to keep himself busy preparing for the role during the hours that I worked. Our free time was spent wrapped up with each other, locking the rest of the world out. It was the only time he seemed to relax in the slightest.

Since his change in medication, there were some days he felt terrible. He started having intense headaches and nausea almost immediately. The doctor insisted that was normal the first few weeks, which was frustrating for him. He was worried it wouldn’t stop before filming began, adding an extra layer to his anxiety. It did seem to be happening less as the days went on, but that did little to ease his fears. It also didn’t seem to be doing much to remedy the issues for which he was taking them, further frustrating him.

In an effort to keep his spirits up, we started planning our trips to see each other. The first trip would be three weeks after filming started. I would be spending a week with him while he worked. He had a scheduled three-day break four weeks after that. Which meant he would fly back home during that time. By then they would be getting into filming out in the middle of nowhere, so we decided to play it by ear at that point because of my work schedule. I had hoped that having those planned visits would give him something to look forward to. A positive distraction to focus on rather than the negative thoughts he said often plagued him.

The morning that he was set to leave, he was a scattered mess. His thoughts were all over the place. He was jumping from one topic to another as he rushed around to make sure he had everything he needed. I felt like he was doing everything he could to not focus on the fact that he was leaving, which was probably a good thing. Both of us seemed to be avoiding that topic directly.

Rylee was traveling with Dieter, so she showed up around an hour before their car arrived to take them to the airport. They went through several checklists to make sure he was all set. I was thankful for that because I had no idea what all he needed. It also helped to keep him distracted.

Before we knew it, their car was out front waiting as they hauled their luggage out. We kept our goodbye brief with a tight embrace and passionate kiss, all while avoiding direct eye contact and not saying a word. We both knew if we lingered too long, one of us would break down. I didn’t want to stress him further, so I knew we needed to avoid that at all costs.

As soon as his car was out of sight, I lost all composure. I couldn’t help it. I had a terrible feeling in the pit of my stomach, and it was making me nauseous. I was worried about how he was going to handle this. As I sat on the couch trying to pull myself together, my phone pinged.

DIETER: Love you, mi estrella. I miss you already.

ME: Love you too. I’ll be with you again soon enough. Call me if you need me, please.

DIETER: I promise I will. I’ll text you when we land.

After I calmed down, I turned off everything and locked his house up. I decided to go back to my place for now. I needed to distract myself. When I got home, I went straight to my craft room and started a new project, a painting for Dieter. He had mentioned multiple times that he wanted me to paint one for his house. I felt like this would be the perfect distraction.

I had an image in my mind that I wanted to recreate for him. A reminder of our most intimate experience, but also a reminder of a happier time from his past. I started by covering the canvas with the brilliant colors of the rising sun, before moving on to the more symbolic images that would serve as the focal point of the piece. The images were slowly beginning to take shape as I blended the dark wood colors with gold, green, and white. I got lost in the project, my emotions finally going numb and thoughts going blank as I had intended.

A/N: Hopefully this chapter wasn’t too much of a mess. My concentration has been all over the place this week for whatever reason and it was a struggle.

Anyway, so there we have it. The fallout from the very public argument with Anna. How we feeling about that? Do you think it will create any problems for our lovely couple? Did your feelings change about the Instagram post after their talk? What are your thoughts on the new characters? Do we think something is going on with Lauren, or is Talia overthinking it?

Dieter has officially left to film, which is what everyone has been dreading. How do we think everything that he is currently dealing with is going to affect him? Any predictions on how this is about to go?

What about Talia’s painting? Any predictions on what it might be?

So many things to ponder in this chapter!

I am issuing a warning now. Things are going to start getting a lot rougher going forward. There is going to be some extreme drama and angst building until it finally hits a breaking point due to a major event that’s going to be pretty heart wrenching for everyone. So, be prepared for the crazy journey ahead.

Mood board for this chapter is included below in case you missed the teaser. 😉

Next Chapter

Tag List: @rhoorl @bitchwitch1981 @readingiskeepingmegoing @runningmom94 @for-a-longlongtime @hisandsnakes @chaoticfestninja @survivingandenduring @partyofone3413 @cakipy-blog @pedrostories @titlee78 @poodlebae @guelyury

Let me know in the comments below if you would like to be added to the tag list.

#dieter bravo #pedro pascal #dieter x ofc #dieter bravo fic #Destiny & Deliverance Series #pedro pascal characters #dieter bravo x ofc #pedro pascal character fanfic #pedro pascal fanfiction #Pedro Pascal Fanfic #dieter bravo x oc #dieter bravo fluff #dieter bravo fanfiction #pedro pascal smut #the bubble #pedrostories

[thelampisaflashlight]

Everything Goes On Pt. 11

[So let's pretend a little longer. Not suitable for younger audiences. Previous part here.] Below the cut.

"When did it start?" Cumulus asks, brushing her thumb over Cirrus' knuckles, "...And why didn't you tell me?"

"It was before New Year's..." Cirrus whispers, "...We were... I never meant for it to go any further than sex, but... but then we started doing other things together. Dates, talking more..."

"I was going to tell you after Aether told Dew, but then Aether ended things with him and..."

"Cir..." Cumulus sighs, "...If you told me back before things got more serious, we could have talked about making this work. I wouldn't have minded bringing someone else into our relationship. We agreed early on that we'd keep things open as long as we talked about who we were seeing, but we also said we wouldn't get emotionally involved with someone else without telling the other person."

"And, and that's why I'm telling you now." Cirrus says, looking at Cumulus, hopeful, "I know... I know I fucked up, but..."

"Cir, do you want to be with Aether?"

"I-I do."

"And you want to be with me?"

Cirrus nods.

"Then why..." Cumulus clenches the hand that isn't holding Cirrus', "I'm sorry, Cir, but... but I need some time to think about this."

"H-How long?"

"How long did you hide Aether from me?" Cumulus asks, "That plus a day. Maybe more, maybe less."

"That's..."

"A long time? Yeah. Yeah, I know."

A silence stretches between them for a time, but Cumulus' hand never leaves Cirrus'.

"I want to make this work." she says, "I want to make this work, but I need time to process whether or not I should."

"Lus..."

"I'm not going to tell you to choose one or the other, but if you love me -if you love both of us- then don't I deserve to have the right to choose whether or not this is something I want?" Cumulus questions, "Even if we work things out that Aether is only with you, I still need to know about that."

Cirrus nods.

"...I'm sorry."

"Are you sorry you hid this from me, or are you just sorry you got caught?" Cumulus cringes as soon as a words leave her mouth, cold and harsh, "...Fuck... I-I need a minute."

Cumulus gets up from her chair, looking between Cirrus and the door, "...How about we shelve this conversation for now?"

"Are... Are you sure?" Cirrus asks, reaching for Cumulus' hand, but missing it when she moves to hold herself, "Lus..."

"I'm sure."

.

.

.

"So, you and Cirrus, huh?" Dew wonders aloud, poking at his travel cup of coffee, "...Wow."

"Can we not do this-" Aether groans.

"We're not doing anything." Dew says, "You and Cirrus on the other hand..."

"You know that's... Fuck, you're impossible."

"Complicated." Dew sips his coffee, "I am complicated. Like math problem. You couldn't solve me, so you gave up."

Aether stirs his drink, looking out at the fields heading towards the lake.

They'd decided to take a walk to give Cumulus and Cirrus time to talk, to clear the air, and maybe attempt to do the same, but there's a wall between them now that wasn't there before.

A disconnect.

"I think, probably, that's where we went wrong." Dew says, "You saw me as a problem, so even when things were going good, if they ever really were, you could still see things you thought you needed to fix. But you couldn't, because I needed to fix myself, and I'm... I'm working on me, but it takes time, and I apparently took longer, I am taking longer, to change than you expected, maybe."

"But, Aeth, I was never going to be 'fixed' and you and I both knew that going into things."

Aether sighs.

"I... I shouldn't have said what I did." he admits, "It wasn't right to pin the blame all on you or your mental health like I did, and I shouldn't have said you didn't have emotions... I know it's hard for you to express yourself the way I do, and I... I'm sorry I said all of those things."

"I'm sure you are." Dew says, settling his coffee down on the bench between them, "But I'm not ready to forgive you, and I can't just sweep everything under the rug and forget it either."

"That's fair." Aether says, "So... what now?"

Dew shrugs.

"I go my way, you go yours, and we try to move on in our own time." Dew tilts his head towards Aether, "And maybe I hit you a couple times myself. Make the left side match the right."

Aether prods the bruise still forming on his face from where Swiss slapped him.

"You and Swiss-"

"Are friends." Dew shuts Aether's question down before he can even finish, "But that does answer my own question. Was gonna ask who hit you, and now I know... I'm gonna buy that man flowers."

Aether swirls his drink, glowering at the lake again.

"Do better." Dew says, standing up and picking up the paper travel cup in order to crumple it and toss it into a nearby trash can, "Be. Better."

"And maybe some day I'll actually hate you instead of just feeling hurt."

.

.

.

When Mountain wakes up, he is acutely aware of the ache in his back and the pool of moisture on his chest.

With a pained groan, he rolls, dislodging a still slumbering Swiss from his body, the trail of drool dribbling from his mouth spilling onto his chin instead of Mountain's skin now.

Casually, he lifts the blanket, humming when he's met with the sight of Swiss' still glowing junk, and pulls it over the other's shoulders, tucking him back in to continue sleeping if he feels like it.

The process of getting to his feet is a slow one, it always is, but once he's standing the rest comes easier.

After a quick smell check, Mountain decides to forgo taking a shower in favor of splashing a bit of cool water on his face and brushing his teeth, typing his hair up to make it look at least semi-presentable for he leaves his room, but before he can finish getting dressed, he hears a knock?

Not on his door but...

Another knock.

The wall between his room and Dewdrop's.

Mountain walks over carefully, not wanting to wake Swiss, and taps back, "Everything okay?"

"...You want to go for that walk?"

#lamp writes #nameless ghouls #cumulus ghoulette #cirrus ghoulette #dewdrop ghoul #aether ghoul #swiss ghoul #mountain ghoul #ghost band #the band ghost #ghost bc #ghost band fanfic