Tumgik
#ugh. im not even sure i love you anymore. but every little conversation we have that doesnt end after 3 messages gives me butterflies still
nimomo-mo · 5 months
Text
Vent
0 notes
chryblossomjjk · 1 year
Text
bts fic recommendations | 01.31.23
Tumblr media
→ hi friends! this is a little segment i do every tuesday (reviewsday get it, aren’t i funny, pls tell me how funny i am) where i read and review two-three fics. as a content creator, i know how big of a role other creators play in your growth, therefore, i want to do my part in making sure everyone gets the recognition they deserve! so with that being said, please check out the amazing fics listed below. make sure to like, reblog, and leave feedback! ♡ #reviewsday #kikirecs
Tumblr media
busted (pt 1 + pt 2) - @btsgotjams27 (jjk x reader | married au, parents au, smut)
summary: your husband comes home with a new gift and you’re not happy with it.
oh.... this is wholesome
Tumblr media
im usually partial to girl dad koo but i've been looking at his bby pictures lately and he was so cute ugh :'( picturing two lil kooks is killing me (also i see where u got the inspo teehee v cute jess)
also he's such a lil shit pls like he knows what he's doing being such a slut and avoiding the conversation !!! we love him for it !!!
this is my fav style of writing by the way. like when the reader is just dropped into a slice of the character's lives and you figure them out based on the context clues. like the fact that kook's mom died is such a small detail here but it adds so much to the world. you did so well with seamlessly dropping tidbits and making it natural, not an easy thing to do!!! but you did it so so so well in this!!
him licking his fingers clean after wearing her pussy like a ring had me
Tumblr media
dad jk putting it the fuck downnnnnn on that bathroom counter SHEESH IM SWEATING!!! also the baby interrupting right before the nut is peak wholesome content lmao!! and the way you incorporated the title TWICE PLS A GENIUS AND THIS WAS SO INCREDIBLY HOT and i would love to see more of this lil family :') <3
Tumblr media
i want to be with you - @oddinary4bts (pjm x reader | idol au, s2l, f2l, fluff, slight angst, smut)
summary: moving to seoul has always seemed like a good idea, until the bubble bursts when you realize your new neighbor is park jimin, and he's not the sweet angel you've always imagined him to be. will the reality of park jimin forever be a nightmare, or will he turn into a sweet dream?
first of all this is just what i needed um what is fanfic if not a vehicle to live out your daydreams anywho... something about moving to a big city and finding love is so fairytale-ish and magical and uGh. the more of these i do the more im starting to think we're all the same bc I RELATE SOME MUCH TO OC GTFO!! and that introduction made me so attached to her because there almost this childlike nature about her?? maybe childlike is the wrong wording but she has so much excitement and ambition, looks to the future with so much hope despite everything that she's been through. yeah. love her dearly will protect at all costs. and the way you contrasted this intro with the intro to the present day to show how now its not a daydream anymore n shes actually dealing w the reality of starting n moving somewhere new *chefs kiss*
"Sometimes, you wondered if faith existed. If there was a bigger plan to the universe, something written for you already that you couldn’t really escape from. It was the thought that crossed your mind as the doors finished moving, and a dark-haired boy – man – stared at you as you just stood there, mouth falling open."
god if theres one thing my communications major literature minor loves its this !!!! foreshadowing !!! like idk this paragraph just tickled my brain in the right way. it really is so beautiful. one of those that you look back on on a second read and smile because it means so much more and aged even better. truly stellar writing.
ALSO BRO THIS OC IS LEGIT MEEEE LIKE HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LIVE OUT MY CLUELESS Y/N WHO HAS NO IDEA WHO BTS IS AND IS MYSTERIOUS AND NON-INTERESTED WHEN I HAVE A WHOLE TATTOO DEDICATED TO PARK JIMIN LMAO THE CHIMMY KEYCHAIN TOOK ME OUT BYE!!
"You expected his features to have that same disgusted scowl he always reserved for you, but his brows fell, as if he was ashamed, or perhaps sad."
"It was so human you found you had to look away."
Tumblr media
and then just the pull towards eachother like this connection was legit fated was so fucking good. them taking care of eachother when they're drunk. hangover fucking soup :'). and then after everything with collin and jimin's spiraling they really needed eachother. like the stars aligned to set this pair up and its so comforting to read. BUT LIKE THE SLOWBURN MADE IT FEEL SO SO EARNED. AND THE WAY YOU ENDED IT WITH THE TITLE I COULD FUCKING SCREAM!!! so so so good. thank you for taking the time to write and share this masterpiece on the platform, you've made it sm better with this beautiful addition :') friends do not walk, RUN to read this.
Tumblr media
41 notes · View notes
hyunjinspark · 2 years
Note
my warm happy butterfly feelings evaporated by the end of the 4th chapter 💀
hana 😭😭 why bestie 😭😭😭 i wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt, i want her to be happy like y/n wants her to be but when she lied to hyunjin about watching his performance + stole y/n’s words/opinion of it, and didn’t seem to give a shit..... 🔪✊😐✊🔪
she clearly doesn’t have a genuine interest in hyunjin’s hobbies and passions, which are important to him and a vital piece of him, and i’m just over here wondering how she thinks that’s gonna work out for her in the long term.... you can’t fake a relationship, well i mean you can, but not if you want an authentic match made in heaven like she seems to desire. i hope someone comes to their senses and talks to her, preferably y/n bc she needs to look out for hana’s heart as her best friend, if not hyunjin’s too as he’s not just an acquaintance anymore, because neither of them deserve.... whatever is going on here. i mean, we don’t know yet what hyunjin’s intentions are for the relationship, if hes also looking for long term or just going with the flow, but either way, hana is not the one for him (obviously, because you didn’t write her to be). he said he wouldn’t hurt hana (at least i think that’s who he was talking about), so i’m curious as to how this is gonna play out.... i’m sure whatever happens, you’re gonna write it so beautifully😭
i think as well that hana’s used her energy focusing on her romantic relationships (past and present) rather than on being observant and a good friend to y/n, which makes me sad. i’m glad y/n has felix though, even if he’s being a jealous bean rn💛
um.... also we love minho the menace. i mean i had to stop and breathe deeply because i was as nervous and embarrassed for what he was gonna say as y/n, but..... dare i say..... he’s useful in progressing the plot✨ if only slightly✨ i could be wrong, bc you didn’t give a direct hint (that i know of), but i’m hoping hyunjin, as the smart, observant boy he is, caught on to what minho was saying. because i really think hyunjin remembers y/n too, whether he’s as sentimental about it as her or not.
..... just thought about the fact that if earlier at the chateau y/n had chosen to ask hyunjin if he remembered her, and he did catch on to what minho was saying at the diner..... boyohboyohboy🤪 the mortification–i can feel it. silly goose y/n hours, for sure. she’d be regretting every decision to open up to anyone she’s ever made.
lastly, i just wanted to point out that i noticed and appreciated the purple pin that was holding up that art piece💜👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨 little foreshadowing there?? i hope🥺
as always love you and your writing. i want to live in the slwy universe so bad😩 the way you’ve described everything like settings and people is so !!!!!! ugh, i don’t have the words. it’s so easy to get immersed in the story each chapter. and i just see so much of myself in the way you’ve written y/n, but she’s living my dream😭 when is it my turn?🤨 but yeah. you’re just so talented jade, i don’t know how else to put it. i might’ve said something like this before but i feel like i need to tell you a hundred times because i don’t want you to ever doubt yourself. thank you for being so creative and sharing that with us. so cool of you lol 🤍
hi anon ! don’t worry your butterflies will come back in chapter 5 😘 im glad you want hana to be happy, but also dislike her 😭 understandable. she definitely does want a match made in heaven but also seems to believe that it means everything will fall into place with no real effort from her side. that’s probably why she isn’t too interested in knowing more about hyunjin as a person. yes! hyunjin’s intentions are unknown too at this point.
we will see if hyunjin caught onto minho’s conversation or remembers yn…👀 that would definitely have been so embarrassing for her if she asked hyun that and then the minho conversation happened ! its a good thing it didn’t right 🤪 so glad you noticed the purple pin 📍
thank you so much for your kind words. i want to live in this universe too so bad, its peaceful and romantic and dreamy and slow. your words went straight to my heart thank u so much! also did you forget your anon emoji or do you not have one ??🧐 i love you !
6 notes · View notes
zvnphoria · 3 years
Text
- how being koko’s best friend would be like
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
a/n - had too much fun with this. THIS IS VERY LONG UM. this is an apology for being inactive.
contains - fluff, teeny bit of angst, just platonic because YEAH, fem!reader, implied strong reader, reader has mommy issues (definitely not projecting), reader had a friendship with akane and looked up to her like an older sister
you and hajime go way back since you were kids. you two met in an interesting way but not necessarily in a good one.
you were walking to the nearest park to get out of your crazy house because your mom kept screaming at you over the littlest thing again. you forgot to wash the dishes (you didn’t necessarily forget that’s for sure). you stopped once you saw a boy around your age getting beaten up by some older kids. his hand gripped tightly on what looked like a school bag and protected it like his life depended on it.
it didn’t matter anymore because you had just knocked out both of the bullies in no time without a thought— almost as if it was normal to you. when you looked at the boy, he had blood going down from his forehead to his cheek, heavily panting and on the verge of passing out. he’s not the fighting type, huh. luckily you had a towel wrapped around your neck since you had just gotten out of the shower when you walked out your house, you weren’t gonna spend much time at the park anyways
you kneeled down and wiped the dripping blood off his face and noticed a bigger figure running towards you both. it was.. a girl?
“hajime-kun! what happened here?!” she panicked as she checked your surroundings
“akane-san.. it’s no big deal i promise..”
“no big deal?! i knew something was up when you rushed the other way. and my bag also happened to be missing! why didn’t you ask for help? you don’t need to be independent all the time.”
“and you,” she began, making eye contact with you
“are you okay? are you hurt?”
“no no! i’m fine don’t worry.”
“she was actually the one who knocked them out, akane-san,”
the older girl looked at the unconscious bullies, then back at you with shock and amazement in her eyes
“you did this? that’s amazing!” she says as she quickly takes your hands and wraps it around hers
“uh.. yes i promise it’s really not a big deal. i’ve dealt through worse, trust me,” you say as you gaze at the direction of your house
“worse or not this is still definitely something! even i cant beat someone up, and i’m way older than you!” she chuckled
“well it’s not like you have the heart to do something like that, akane-san,” the boy comments
“hahah you’re right, you’re right. anyways we should get going now— the sun is gonna set very soon, and you should get home as well. is your house nearby? we can walk you if you’d like,”
even ‘til this day you still don’t know why you didn’t decline her offer. was it because she was nice? it didn’t matter anymore, because if you had declined, you wouldn’t get to meet such amazing people.
it’s been a few months after meeting hajime and akane, and you had also met akane’s younger brother who was your age— seishu! you four would often hang out, whether it was at the inui home or at hajime’s house. getting to know them was pretty fun, and very interesting because a certain someone had a crush on akane.
it was definitely not seishu because they’re siblings and that’s just weird, definitely not you because akane had reminded you of your older sister who was almost never in your life, so that only left one choice— hajime.
his crush on her was so painfully obvious that you couldn’t stand seeing him try to impress her every now and then. he even ditched his glasses and bought contacts just for her to compliment him! he’s whipped huh..
one day you decided to help him out a little with his crush. it was another day of your usual hang outs except this time it was at your local mall! akane’s birthday was coming up and you three had collectively agreed to take her to the mall and see if she would see anything she’d like. turns out she was eyeing some platforms with red on the bottoms, and you took notice.
seishu dragged her to go to the food court with him because he was “hungry” so you and hajime took the chance to buy the heels. you were both now at the cash register, waiting for the register person
“i don’t understand you,” you began
“i don’t understand why you like her so much. i mean— i get that’s she’s amazing and nice and pretty and all but.. there’s another reason why you like her. something must’ve happened for you to be so attached to her so what is it?” you meant no harm with this question whatsoever. you were simply curious and that’s all.
before he answered, he smiled to himself and looked back at you
“she’s the only one that makes me feel not under pressure all the time. she’s the one who constantly reminds me that i shouldn’t be so independent and that i should always ask for help.” as you took a breath in to reply, he stopped you
“before you say anything, i know. i know she doesn’t like me. i know she’s just being nice. but there’s nothing wrong with a one-sided crush right?” he grins
even though he was beaming with a smile in front of you, you knew. you knew this wasn’t how he truly felt. you knew that deep down he was hurt but it was understandable. after all, he was just a kid wasn’t he? you saw right through him.
it was a shame after what happened the next couple of weeks after that conversation. it all happened so fast and none of you were prepared for it. you weren’t prepared for the incident that had happened to akane. a few days before it occurred, koko proudly told you that he was planning to confess and you were way against it.
“huh?! but i need to get this off my chest, y/n! i don’t care if she rejects me or not!”
“haji, i have a bad feeling about this.. i’m serious. you know how i always get bad feelings and they turn out to be true!”
he groaned and scooted far from where he was originally sitting which was right next to you. you sigh and got up to sit down next to him and laid your head on his shoulder so he wouldn’t escape
“i just don’t want you to get your hopes up, that’s all.” deep down you knew the truth. akane wasn’t interested in boys one bit despite all the confessions she had received almost every week.
“fine. you have a point. but im still going with this,”
all you could do was do nothing but let him. oh how you wished you protested more, because in return all he got was a huge burden on his shoulders.
“please ma’am, just please tell me what room akane inui and seishu inui are in,” you shouted as tears were rolling down on your cheeks. “107, right down the hall and take a left ‘hon”
you bowed and quickly made your way into the room. as you burst the door open, your eyes immediately go on seishu who looked so sad to the point where he didn’t even bother to look up at you. you hug him with a feeling of relief flowing in your body, but soon that feeling was gone when you asked where akane was.
you stood outside the door, not knowing why your feet couldn’t move. what’s wrong, y/n? her voice rang your ears. go on, don’t worry i’ll be right here next to you and if you get scared, just hold my hand! right. that was the time you were at a “haunted” house together and you were scared to go in. why are you being reminded of this right now?
you gulped and slowly opened the doorknob and found a crying boy in front of you, hands grabbing on the sheets with his head on the edge of the bed. you couldn’t do anything. all you could do was sit next to him with your head resting on his shoulder while you were crying.
a few years after that, you both acted as if nothing had happened. not because you wanted to forget akane, but because you knew akane would’ve wanted you both to continue living on without her.
despite not dating, you two would always have couple tendencies like feeding food to eachother or hugging often but you’re just THAT close to the point you can probably kiss without feeling any romantic attraction whatsoever
you couldn’t hang out with him as much anymore because of all the gang related things he’s doing. to make it up to you, he knocks on your window late at night and sleeps over most of the time. you talk to him about the usual— have you been eating? you should get more rest. and so on.
you were the one who got him to start wearing eyeliner! at first he just looked at you with a confused face when you handed him it as his present, but then you explained that if he wants to go fully dedicated to the black dragons, the wings of the eyeliner would represent the wings of the dragon. he didn’t wear it at first, all he did was ruffle your hair and said he’d think about it— and he kept his word! so now he’s the iconic money-making genius that wears eyeliner.
after all that’s happened between you two, there isn’t a single awkward moment you share. you know those friends who bring up an adult related topic out of completely nowhere? you two were those friends.
“i was walking by an alley and i heard a girl getting fucked,” he says while chewing the piece of gum you handed to him
“..and??”
“i’ve never walked away so fast in my life.”
there are days where you’re sad but, of course, you don’t tell him. in fact you don’t need to tell him because he’ll know when you’re upset.
“so are ya gonna tell me what’s wrong?” he says as he rests his head on your thighs
“ugh how do you always know..”
“because we’ve been together for the longest, duh.”
he doesn’t show it much, but he cares for you more than you think he does. overprotective and can’t help but show it at times, but don’t worry! he’s doing it because he loves you. remembers the littlest things you talk about and are interested in. he’s also constantly on the lookout so that you don’t get hurt or even worse.
when he’s the one who’s upset, you immediately know. he’s quieter than usual, zoning out a lot and just not paying attention to what you’re saying to him, almost like he’s in his own little world. before you initiate a conversation, you play with his hair so he’ll feel comfortable as a way for you to convince him to tell you what’s wrong.
even though it happened such a long time ago, he still thinks about her. you cant blame him, you do too! if you were to describe your best friend with one sentence, the first thing that would pop up in your head was weak little boy. not weak as in physically weak, but weak as in mentally weak. he can’t help but get emotional when it comes to her, which is understandable.
“it’s not your fault, hajime. she left you with no proper closure, and now you’re carrying guilt and burden on your shoulders. anyone would feel the same or even worse in your position.”
he didn’t respond but he doesn’t need to. all that matters to him is that you’re next to him, comforting him with your kind words like you always do. you both have some differences which caused a few arguments, but in the end you would still be best friends.
speaking of arguments, you argue either over the dumbest things ever or over serious topics. one time you got mad at him because he was beating you in a video game and his smug expression was not helping at all. you kicked him out of your house because you were just THAT frustrated. you felt guilty so you decided to walk to his house and apologize but stopped once you saw a certain figure trying to climb up to your window.
in the start of the serious argument, it was completely something different than what you were yelling at each other about now.
he showed up at your house with your favorite boba and snacks. you demanded him to put those down.
“hajime. food— no. MONEY cant keep me happy forever, and that also applies to you!”
“then what else am i supposed to do?!” his voice started getting weak. he was never the type to argue because he’d always get emotional.
“what am i other than a money-making genius? other than a wallet?”
“i cant do anything about my situation, y/n. nothing. because that’s all i am. just a stupid wallet for everyone to use.” he says about to walk away until you grab his sleeve to stop him.
“that’s not even true. you’re so much more than that, hajime. i’m sorry.. i’m so sorry.” you were crying into his chest and he couldn’t help but cry with you.
he spoils you 100%, no doubt. there was a point in life where you would always decline but you had just gotten so used to the offer that you got tired of fighting back. i mean, how could you? he was so willing and eager and most importantly HAPPY to do this for you.
hajime cant drive motorcycles and you constantly tease him about it, which he just responds to you by squeezing your cheeks together so you could shut up. the bad thing about this is that you guys always have to walk or go on a bus to the specific place you’re going to which is pretty tiring at times. although that doesn’t matter because what matters is that you both have each other.
back to the overprotective part.. you got called by this boy to meet him at the rooftop by the end of school and you already knew what was about to go down because of your shoujo manga reading sessions. the first thing you did was call hajime and he immediately got there to warn you about what you were gonna get yourself into.
“don’t you already have someone you like??”
“uh.. no?”
“i couldve sworn you liked that ‘tora dude..”
“keep your mouth shut!”
“…so you’re gonna reject him right?”
and you did! nicely, of course. hajime advised you should make come off as mean so he wouldn’t bother you again but you just ignored him and pretended like you didn’t hear anything.
being his best friend contains some ups and downs, but that’s the point of true friendships— it’ll never be perfect.
220 notes · View notes
buckys-black-dress · 3 years
Text
✄ chapter two: keep it cool like iced tea
a/n: here's chapter two! obvi this is just building the plot and storyline, but we're seeing the beginnings of the magic! anyways, let me shut up so u can read. ok bye!
wc: 2k
[fratboy!bucky barnes x fem!reader]
series masterlist
-
To say you sucked at pong was a vast understatement.
And although you really didn't want to make a fool of yourself in front of this very nice, very tall, very attractive guy, you can't help but feel like an idiot when you sink your first shot into a cup halfway through the game.
You're definitely on your way drunk with the amount of shots Natasha and Sam have scored on you, plus all the ones you've missed.
When Natasha told you to let loose tonight, you're not so sure this is what she meant, though. You see her laughing and giving you eyes from across the table, while your face is bright red. You brush off her looks with a roll of your eyes, darting them back to Bucky.
Bucky.
Bucky with the incredibly nice hands and arms, who seems to be making the shots for the both of you. Bucky who's been occasionally slinging an arm over your shoulders, paying close attention to you. Bucky who's been asking you questions about yourself, that you've returned back, and received witty responses to.
"So, where 're ya from, Y/N?" He asks in a slurred voice, but you can tell he's not exactly drunk yet.
"I'm from New York. You?" You ask, throwing back another drink from a shot that Nat made into your cup.
"No shit! I'm from Brooklyn!" He smiles, a big, bright smile that tugs at your heartstrings for some reason.
"I'm Manhattan born and raised, mister." You return his blinding smile.
"Small world, huh?" He laughs, once again wrapping his arm around you. "Can't believe we've never ran into each other before."
"Well, New York City's quite large, Bucky." You giggle, and he laughs back. As you feel your face warm up, he looks down at you with something akin to adoration in his eyes. Bucky towers over you, deciding that the pong game was over between the four of you.
He walks back to the kitchen, assuming that you'd follow him.
But he turns around to ask you in you'd like something to drink, and you're not there.
You're still chatting with Natasha and Sam, and it takes him a second to realized you wouldn't just follow after him. You didn't really give him the impression of being that type of girl.
Which is what intrigued him more about you. You weren't worshipping the ground he walked on, you didn't initiate conversation too much, and you didn't drool over him like every other girl he's met.
He suddenly feels a surge of awkwardness. He sees you talking animatedly with Sam and Natasha, and now Steve has joined in the conversation. You were talking completely comfortably with them, much more comfortably than you were with him.
It makes him wonder what he'll have to do to get you to get like that with him.
What he'll have to do to make you trust him.
"Hey, Y/N, I was gonna head to the kitchen and grab a drink. Wanna join?" He questions, seeing his friends giving him cocked eyebrows in confusion.
Bucky could usually get any girl he wanted. Especially at a party like this one. Why was he so hell-bent on spending time with you?
"O-Oh! Sure, I'll join you." You excuse yourself from the group, and Bucky slings his arm through your waist to guide you through the crowd. You feel you stomach flip in a way you've never felt before, and feel your cheeks redden.
"So, what can I get you?" Bucky practically yells over the music, trying to meet your eyes. You avert them quickly, and simply tell him a vodka lemonade.
He hands it to you with a strange look in his eyes, and you give him a kind smile while taking your first sip.
"God, you trying to get me wasted here?" You gag with a laugh, looking into your cup and back to Bucky.
"Sorry, doll, might'a gone a bit heavy on the vodka. You still good to drink it?" He queries with genuine concern in his eyes.
And although you already well on your way to drunk, past tipsy, you give fervent nod, and give it another sip.
It was good.
-
As the night had progressed further, you had two more of Bucky's vodka lemonades.
And now, you were drunk.
You also didn't know where Natasha was, but she was probably off somewhere with Sam, so you weren't worried for her safety.
Bucky was still by your side throughout the whole night, offering to dance, and even just sit and talk.
Which is what you were doing right now. In the middle of the crowd, you were practically on top of Bucky while you two talked about anything from academics to your daily lives.
"So, in your major, what would you say was the dumbest thing someone's asked?" He laughs, and he's clearly also past the line of tipsy and has fallen into drunk, right with you.
"Uhhh... oh! One time, this guy-"
"Doll, I can't really hear ya." Bucky laughs
"Oh, sorry," You blush, trying to speak louder, but it still wasn't working.
"Do you- would you be okay with just goin' up to my room? Don't think we'll get much of anythin' done down here." He gives you a look that says 'I'm not gonna hurt you, unless you want me to.'
It sends a shiver down your spine, and you stand up, waiting for him to guide you up the stairs.
You knew you weren't going to have sex with him. You had only met him four hours ago, and no matter how many girls he could pull in that time, you were not interested in being one of them.
"Just so you know now, I'm not planning on sleeping with you." You burst out while you're halfway up the stairs, your eyes going wide at your own words.
"Huh," Bucky chuckles, "I know I have a reputation that precedes me, but I didn't think this is where that was going. Just wanted to continue to conversation." He smiles down at you, finally opening his door.
Of course, Bucky was lying right through his teeth. Of course he wanted to sleep with you. You were nice, smart, had a hell of a body, and had kept his attention the longest out of any girl he's ever met. But when it comes down to it, he was a boy.
And boys usually only thought with one organ; their dicks.
As the lamp flicks on, a small glow filters over the room, giving it a cozy feel. You, on the other hand, felt nothing but cozy.
"You can sit anywhere. Wanna watch somethin'?" He asks, tossing you the remote while you stood, frozen at the doorway.
"I- uh, sure?" You ask, more than you tell him, but sit down on his bed. You were careful to not flash him while you adjusted yourself, not sure of what to do.
The last thing you needed tonight was the most notorious playboy on campus seeing your black lace thong right now.
"Do you wanna change into somethin' more comfortable, angel?" Again, your stomach has butterflies trying to escape at his sweet words. But you knew better than to think too much into it. he probably said these names to every girl who's come into this very bed.
Ew, you think to yourself, this bed must have STDs sewn in the sheets by now.
"I- sure? If you have anything that fits, I guess." You grumble.
"Sure, I've got a t-shirt and boxers, if you want? Don't have much else, honestly." He laughs lightly, handing you the items and points to the bathroom in the corner of his room.
As you're standing in the middle of Bucky Barnes' jack and jill bathroom, you take a moment and think to yourself.
How did I get here?
Will he ask me to sleep here?
Does he still expect anything from me?
I hope not.
I'm really tired.
Ugh. Whatever. I'm too tired to think this much right now.
You pull of your dress that you couldn't stand to be in anymore, and put on the clothes Bucky had provided you with.
They were quite large on you, considering the guy was about the size of bigfoot. But you couldn't find it in yourself to complain about it right now.
You exit the bathroom, setting the dress down on the floor where you had kicked off your heels, and sit back down next to Bucky on his bed.
You feel your skin slide under the blanket that was thrown over him, and focus on the TV screen.
"So, what're we watching?" You query, trying to figure out what was playing.
Little did you know, Bucky was still thinking about the way you had looked when you walked out of the bathroom. It did something to him, seeing you in his clothes like that, for some reason.
The way you were practically swimming in them, and the way you knuckled at your eyes tiredly that made him want to hold you to his chest while you both fell asleep.
He was trying to shake the thoughts from his head, wondering what the hell had gotten into him with these thoughts.
Since when did he, Bucky Barnes, think about a girl like this? It was usually much dirtier and nastier in his head, but you were doing something to him.
"Bucky? Everything alright up there?" You giggle, knocking on his skull lightly.
"I- yeah, all good, doll." He shakes his thoughts away, focusing back on you. "I put on whatever was playing, didn't switch it because I didn't know what you liked." Bucky explains.
"Hm, well this seems good. We can just keep this on?" You suggest, realizing that Home Alone 2 was playing on his TV. "I love this movie. This kid's got some real class." You chuckle, now fully watching the movie.
"He's a genius, I'll give 'im that much." Bucky laughs, also fixing his gaze on the movie.
In the hour that passed, you two have made small talk about the movie here and there, and every time, Bucky's gaze became transfixed on you. With the glow of the TV illuminating your face, with the way you smiled and threw your head back when you laughed, he couldn't help it.
Finally, the movie had come to a close, and Bucky could tell you were fighting sleep. You were practically asleep sitting up against his headboard.
"You wanna spend the night here, doll?" He wonders out loud, looking over to you.
You shoot him a look, a playful glare with a hint of a smile.
"I mean, it's a bit late for me to head back to my dorm. But no funny business, mister." You point a finger at him, and Bucky holds his hands up in the air.
"No funny business, I promise." He holds out his pinky to you, to which you curl yours around, and latch on.
Once the lamp next to his side of the bed is turned off, you slide further down in his bed, trying to find a comfortable position. After a few minutes of adjusting, you snuggle your head into the pillows that smell like laundry detergent and his cologne.
"Goodnight, Bucky," you say out loud into the darkness while you both face each other.
"G'night doll. See ya in the morning." Bucky's voice is a low baritone, clearly about to succumb to the sleep he was fighting.
"See ya in the morning." You reply, finally letting your eyes fall shut.
That night, you dream of Bucky Barnes and his cologne.
And across from you, Bucky Barnes dreams of a world where this is normal. A world where you sleep next to him every night, and you wake him up every morning with a kiss.
Man, I'm totally fucked, is the last thought he has before falling into a sleep surrounded by you.
113 notes · View notes
hyukmoon · 3 years
Text
moon. | l.sy x gn!reader
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
lee sangyeon x gn!reader
word count: about 4.01k
to put it short: congrats! Something you should actually say, right? Your best friend and crush is getting married in two days and you feel,... well, not very good about it. So, wait... he's returning the feelings? Damn.
content warning: ANGST in capital letters, I would add lots of exclamation points but im lazy. So yeah, hella angsty. Some good old making out, it's kind of heavy at some point but no smut at this point lol. I don't condone any of the done actions, so yeah, I would've personally handled everything differently, but you know, y/n is kinda wild. Very awkward sometimes, but that's more the situation in itself. ALSO, NOT PROOFREAD
taglist: @loki-in-hogwarts
note: the second thing i wrote and im somewhat excited!!! Yes! Exclamation points. So,... thanks for reading :)
Tumblr media
It was a great day. Well, at least seemingly for everyone but you. Your best friend in this world Sangyeon was about to get married to the love of his life, who is notyou and now you just stand in the hotel lobby waiting for it to happen. Funnily enough, the crushing feeling of desperation and fear didn’t seem to set in yet.
The hotel lobby was filled to the brim with acquaintances and other guests possibly confused by the uproar of the wedding guests. So, who were you specifically waiting for? The rest of your friend group, the ones who will most likely clean up after the wedding whatever will be left of you.
A nervous smile swept up to your lips, casually just avoiding every sort of tension that could come across you. Just with the luck of this entire occurrence an older woman started to approach you, demon alike features spreading around her face almost like she knew you were apparently the only single person here. An aunty, that wasn’t even related to you but had all the business to judge.
“Are you here for the bride or the groom?”, her sweet voice rang a familiar feeling in your stomach. Almost too sweet, making you suspicious of her intent. “I’m here for my best friend, Sangyeon. So, yeah, for the groom.”, you hesitated a second, “What about you though? Do you know the bride?”
“She’s my youngest niece, the only one that still visits, her sisters don’t even care anymore…” You nodded politely, not wanting to anger her now and stepped towards a different direction.
“So, my dear, are you here with anybody?” You already feared that question, the same as always. The eyes of yours started with a panicked expression searching through the room a familiar pair. “No, I am here on my own. I kinda wanted to focus on getting Sangyeon through with it, being there for him.” As a friend.
Possibly this was the first part of feeling despair and fear. People at this wedding were really waiting for them to get married. They weren’t joking, this would change everything.
“Ah, I see. You know, get over him. Well, it is time for you at least, you’re not getting younger. There are quite few handsome men here. I remember the names Juyeon and ah yes! Kevin, get over here!” As far as you were concerned, your facial expression couldn’t possibly look more stunned than a moment ago, yet another one of your good friends appeared, seemingly just as confused.
This only held on for a good second, Kevin knew exactly what to do. “Oh hi, I’m so sorry to steal [Y/N] away from you, but I actually need to talk to them on my own over a gift we both prepared for the couple!”, he grinned at the lady, who was obviously smitten with him. “Yes, of course, hun. Take your time.” She finally hushed into a separate direction.
“So, how are we doing? You seem kinda… stressed.”
“You don’t say”, you sighed, “if I have to go through a conversation like this again today, believe me I’ll-. “
“Yeah, I’m pretty sure I get the sentiment. Even though I meant more the other situation. Like in, Sangyeon getting married and you sitting here all grumpy because of it.”, Kevin was already aware of your “small” infatuation with your best friend, a man too far out of your reach also funnily enough, the man’s wedding you’re attending. However, your friend in front of you didn’t seem to mind talking about it out loud in a place like the hotel lobby. Your lips tightened up into a fine line.
“I’m not grumpy! I just…I don’t really know what to do. I mean, I know I’m going to be there for him but yeah, okay, I might feel a bit grumpy.” The lobby did clear up a lot now.
“Okay, oof. There’s this dinner with everyone in the evening today, do you think you can get through that?”, Kevin asked hesitantly just as stressed with this additional complication.
“I mean, I probably have to, don’t I? This makes me so sick, ugh. Not gonna lie, my stomach feels like a laundry machine.” You laughed quietly and drifted off again into a place where you didn’t need to think about this.
“What did you really expect though? You know I love you, respectfully, but like, this feels like an incredibly bad move to do.”
“Don’t you think it would be worse if I didn’t show up at all? I’ll just need to go through this weekend and I’m outta here. No one will know anything.” It might feel like a nightmare but at least a nightmare you can actually run away from and not actually have to face at some point.
“Well, I hope you’ll keep your confidence. Because imagine I saw the person, I love getting married to someone else. Oh my, believe me, you wouldn’t find me for the next three weeks.”
“Not very helpful, a good three out of ten. I guess, I’ll just stick to sulking around then.” A dead smile crept up your lips following a stern look from your side at your opposite.
“Seems like a good plan, just stick to me, maybe we will find someone to take your attention away from this, huh?” A sly grin was visible on Kev’s face.
“Ughhh, of course. Let’s do this. It can’t get much worse than that”, you cleared your throat, “thanks, though. You actually make this here somewhat bearable.”
“Awww, come on. We should pack out our suitcases.”
Tumblr media
No one can really prepare someone for a moment like this. Most older folk turned into their hotel rooms which left you in a party like situation seeing your closest friends turning it up in a huge pavilion while the future groom sits comfortably on a velvety sofa hand in hand with his fiancée.
The air was quite warm even at this time of the evening, not humid, just warm enough for everyone to taste the end of this era with nostalgia and a slight feeling of energy to experience what’s to come afterwards.
You as well sat down, continuously processing your environment. With a cup of your favorite drink, you felt invincible, nothing able to shake you down.
Now while this wasn’t a preferred environment, this was manageable; you could look your best friend into his eyes and proudly congratulate him on his wedding. You would be able to get over this and continue to be a great friend. Black hair with an intense facial expression made its way into your viewpoint along with a somewhat tipsy Kevin. Simultaneously the lighter hair of your best friend fought his way through the crowd.
Lee Sangyeon, the man lighting up your mood with simple touch of his fingertips was now signalizing for you to head outside towards the veranda of the pavilion. He exuded patience, yet clearly waiting for a response of you. You nodded and brushed cautiously over your evening attire.
“Hii, [Y/N]! Can I introduce this someone to you? This is Juyeon, he might look a bit intense, but he’s really nice to talk to! So, I’m gone for a sec then!” Kevin started drifting off into a different direction where you stopped him in his tracks.
“Could this wait? Sangyeon needs to talk to me. I think it’s important, I’ll come back though in a bit!” You gifted both of them an apologetic face and made your way around the men towards the going to be groom.
Surely it wasn’t exactly clear why he wanted to speak to you, especially on his own. He was still waiting for you after all.
“[Y/N]! What has it been? Like three? Four months? I missed you so much.”, Sangyeon pulled you into his chest abruptly and sighed softly into your shoulder. Engulfed entirely in his figure you never wanted to wake up from this again. Was it now 10 seconds? 15 seconds? Neither he nor you really seemed to let go, taking in all the scents of his that were formerly familiar to you.
“Yeah, I think so. You were probably busy planning this all and I just had to work, I guess.” Trying to keep it short was your main goal, appearing distant maybe. He didn’t mind at all though. Not discouraged from continuing this conversation Sangyeon pointed at the veranda, showing the only speck of space with little to no crowd.
The veranda was close to closed off to the party. Non distinguishable palm trees in the far distance were playing right into your cards for not having to look into his eyes. Magnetically glowing, that’s how he appeared. All happy and smiley about the obvious luck he was experiencing. Now again, he sat down with you in the beach chairs without loosing a word.
“The palm trees are so pretty. You remember me wanting to buy some new plants?”, you tried to invite him to the conversation.
“You always want to buy new plants, which time do you mean?” Sangyeon grinned to himself. “You know what? It’s so weird. Everything feels still so unreal. This wedding, also you at my wedding… So weird.”
“I am literally your best friend, where else should I be? Your funeral? At home? Who else is going to charm the hotel staff for some free capri suns and new towels?” Your mouth crinkled up and you let out a soft laugh.
“[Y/N] … You know exactly what I mean!”
“Noo, not at all. I’m so confused right now, not gonna lie.” Your face finally moved towards his direction, seeing his gentle gaze resting on you.
“Do you remember when we were still in school, and we promised each other we would marry each other if we didn’t find anybody else?” His gaze got more intense with each sentence.
“Yeahh, kind of. I was probably tired and it’s like ten years ago. I’m not really sure what you’re trying to tell me.”
“I really thought I was going to marry you. For several years, actually.”, he laughed. “I had such a crush on you and then you met your s/o and all that. Ughh, it seemed so complicated back then. Kind of weird to think about what could have happened if I did ask you out or something.”
“True.”, you turned away again standing up and resting against the wooden railing of the pavilion. “But you didn’t so, let’s just drop it there.” The weather as well started rebelling a bit, the wind hugging your figure slightly too tight for your taste.
“Why are you so cold all of a sudden?”, he whispered closely behind you.
“Well, you’re getting married tomorrow. And you’re telling me about a crush you had on me?”, you croaked.
“I was just being nostalgic, I thought this would be fine with you.” Sangyeon appeared now next to you on the railing, waiting for you to face his concerned dark eyes.
“It isn’t for me. It just feels wrong.”
“What feels so wrong about it? It was a long time ago.”
It is here, the bitterness. Bitterness shouldn’t even be the correct term, the pain of your heart going into a slump didn’t feel like a fitting word. Being reminded again that you will never have a chance again.
“Wait or is it not a long time ago for you?”, The voice of his tried to word his next sentence very carefully.
“I went out with them because I thought you were joking. Then when I thought about you, it was always different. It was too late though, you met her.” Only the close ocean along with the wind were hearable, neither you nor he were able to form another thought put into a sentence.
“You could’ve told me. I would’ve-.”
“Broken up with her?”
“No, I-.”
“Then what could you have done?”, you interrupted Sangyeon’s rambling, trembling while speaking. Terribly spiteful with a bite that wasn’t too often dripping down your lips.
“This.” Sangyeon pressed a fluttery kiss against your lips. Slender fingers tapped onto the skin right under your chin, signalizing you to look at him.
The now much calmer atmosphere made you snake your arms around his torso. Heat rose towards your head, longing after a second out in the cold again just to see his lovely facial expression. Your lips broke off and touched once more in an almost hypnotic fashion.
His hot breath started sliding downwards your cheek to your neck, physically making you unable to resist his entrancing presence. Also his hands broached over from your face down to your waist, holding you with the lightest touch.
Sangyeon’s lips darted away from yours, catching you staring deeply into his eyes. The silence felt warm now as well, filled with the slow and recovering breath of the participants.
“[Y/N], I think I still feel that way.”, a rosy blush swept over the man’s face you wanted to hear say these things so many times and so long ago.
“No. No. No. You shouldn’t! I shouldn’t either! I have to go.” The reality of the situation caught up to you. This was bad. Incredibly bad. Still the disgusting feeling of hope within this made its way up to your head. Stinging alongside the feeling of remorse, you didn’t think clearly, especially now, next to him.
You darted in the fastest way possible from the pavilion up to the hotel to your room, leaving him there.
Tumblr media
Today should be the final day. The hopes that already should have been buried a long time ago, crawled up again and clawed its way into your mind. What if he leaves her for you today? Like in those unrealistic rom coms. Yes, again, it was unrealistic.
Leaving her at the altar and running after you. While all those thoughts of hope and wishes came together you found yourself with a stomachache. His fiancée was an incredibly nice person, sweet and kind along with being a beauty. You shouldn’t even dare to think about Sangyeon that way anymore, she deserved a lot more. Quite honestly, you felt pathetic. Who were you to run into their possible future?
Just because of a simple brush over the lips, his eyes staring into yours like no one else existed but you and his soft hands delicately touching your waist. A tap on your shoulder put you out of your trance, “[Y/N]? Can you go up to Sangyeon’s room? He asked for you.” Kevin’s eyes glanced at you with uncertainty. Neither you nor he knew why he wanted to see you.
Even more importantly, why did he need to see you alone? This seemed like dangerous territory after, basically yesterday. Agony rose again, what if he really was going to leave her?
“Sure, I don’t know why he wants to see me again though.”, you said and left to see the groom’s room. You stumbled more and more over every step closer to the door of the man who’s going to rip your heart and air out of your lungs. The normally soft laid out carpet felt in this moment like you were stepping barefoot over glass. There was the door, brightly painted in eggshell paired with the digits of the hotel room.
Before you could reach the door to knock on it, light brown waves greeted your overtly surprised face.
“You clean up well.”, Sangyeon’s rang in your ears clearer than freshly hung-up laundry in your nose. His previously concerned face curled up into a faint smile.
“Same goes for you”, you tried your best to hide the very apparent frog in your throat, “So, why do you need me?”
“Just needed to see you before going out there, I guess.”, his voice got a lot quieter. It got silent.
Not sure if a said word was necessary, you plopped down on a small, velvety stool. Every whisper was to be heard. An otherness surrounded Sangyeon, like he wasn’t there anymore, and his thoughts took over his being. You scooted closer towards him, just wanting to see him up close for the last time like this, smelling his earthy cologne from this distance.
“Why are you doing this to me?”, your voice went close to hoarse after the question. He was just as silent as before. No sound, nothing. This torment of a weekend was supposed to end with no gratification, not feeling free from this feeling on your chest? Your hand slid over his, the most desperate attempt to get his attention while also experiencing his touch again. Sangyeon jerked his hand back and returned to his absent posture.
“Why do you want to hurt me like this? I am your best friend, and you use me like I’m nothing.” The lack of power you had now made you sink down to the beige teddy carpet. Small tears started swelling up in your nearly dry eyes, kind of contradictory, yet the more tear drops rolled down your cheeks the rottener and hollow you felt.
“You were my best friend until you-.”, he stopped midsentence, “made me feel things again I didn’t need, I didn’t want.” Also his face was wet, ridden with tears making his usually calm and cheerful persona look like a painful insult.
“You asked me here. It hurts, Sangyeon. I can’t make it stop hurting, I don’t know what to do”, you reached for him again, “Could I ever be enough for you?” He returned your former attempts to stroke your face. Cornering both of you, the air trapped you in the toxins of heartbreak and hopelessness.
Once again, Sangyeon’s hand glid over your soft skin and halted on your face. Glaringly staring into each other’s eyes, you were there again. The day before, yesterday. Close to baring the soul of each person present.
“[Y/N], it’s not about being enough. It never has been. I have made a commitment I already broke, I…I can’t do this”, he sighed, “you know I love her.”
“I thought you loved me as well.” Overwhelming nothingness overruled you, almost scaring you about this reaction. You weren’t crying, yelling nor having any physical reaction at all. It was convincingly numb; the resting hurt would come later. Sangyeon’s head dropped in the dip of your shoulder and neck.
This sort of closeness would never happen again. You feeling him breathing into you while having his comforting heartbeat close to yours.
“I do, but I can’t do this to her. I would never do this to her.”, he whispered into your shoulder. A sigh came from his side.
“Then, please. Kiss me, for the last time.” The last part of the sentence left a disgustingly bitter taste in your mouth. This was over, right? His head, which was formerly resting on your shoulder, drifted up and towards yours. Also his expression blank and hollow, like he didn’t know anything.
For the last time, his hands cupped your face in a comfortable manner. As always, he felt homely, but he surely wasn’t yours ever. Not even waiting a good second or two, the light brunette’s face came closer to yours. With no hesitation both of your lips touched tenderly, releasing every sort of affection that could be expressed at that second. You inhaled again his intoxicating scent, in the hopes of having him all over you. His now reddened lips moved closer towards your jawline making you gasp for air.
Also, you weren’t completely still, constantly shifting your hands up and down over his torso upwards his neck, desperately feeling everything, you can for the last time. Sangyeon’s locks tickled you softly while he suddenly latched his mouth onto your neck right below your ear.
“No. Please, I just want a kiss on my lips.”, you said lowly, closely resembling a whine afterwards. He complied pretty quickly, leaving you with no thought but him tickling your bottom lip with his warm tongue. With him being this fast, you didn’t want to keep him on his toes. Entirely engaged in this moment, hands surprised you again on your waist, wandering closer and closer under the blouse you were wearing. You moaned into the kiss, making him take the opportunity to maneuver his tongue into your mouth.
Similarly to you, he was also stunned for a short moment when you grabbed up onto some strands of hair. A sigh left his now plump lips, a need of fresh air arrived onto both of you. Yet this was short lived, his hands captured your chin and attached his lips again onto yours in a matter of mere seconds. A bell rang, close footsteps to be heard across the floor reminding you of the situation you were in.
“Why am doing this? I am so sorry.”, you broke off his lips and took a step backwards at the door.
“[Y/N], we both did this, and it won’t happen again. We just need some time without each other. I think it would be for the best if we don’t spend time together alone anymore.”
“Are you doing what I think you’re doing? I don’t know what to say. I-.”, His lips captured yours again fast with a lot more force behind his kiss.
A strong arm shut the about to be opened door again and hovered over your head. The other one caught grabbed your chin with an almost contradictory feeling to it, the lightest touch just to shove you into his direction. You sighed into his lips, waiting for him to commit with his tongue one more time. Buttery lips pressed against yours and clang inside your mouth. Fiercely did your tongues meet, ending with him sucking on yours. Wet cheeks batting against each other with no intent of separating, your movement still came to a halt.
“You know what? I hate this. I want you to be happy, then if it is with her, I will just y’know…go or uhm mind my business.”, you slurred the last part. It wasn’t really one of your most prideful moments. Still flushed with tears and embarrassment you dropped again against the room door.
“I ask for one condition though,” incredibly hearse was your voice after the crying and even more so because of your follow up, “I do not not want to see you for some time, I don’t want to have to see your face ever again.” Tears weren’t anymore swelling up in your eyes, they never seemed to stop running down with no chance of leaving this conversation with an ounce of self-respect and pride.
It wasn’t even really much of a problem to leave him behind for a bit, it most likely would be for the best anyway, yet while his words should only leave a small mark and feel like a ripped off band aid, you felt alone. A sense of loneliness crept stealthily into you leaving you with nothing but a severe feeling of dread.
“If that is what you want, I’ll respect that.” The room got quieter till you heard the last of his words: “Of course, I still want you in on my wedding though, you’re still my best friend.” Sangyeon’s usual soft and kind smile appeared on his face, seemingly reaching you an olive branch. The former assertiveness and confidence drained through the conversation; you were nothing but a wreck.
“Alright, I’ll be there.”
Tumblr media
The ceremony was beautiful. Fairy like flowers were hung all across the beach space, making the place more surreal than it was to begin with. Everything light with a hint of light green and an even lighter lavender tone. The air seemed to have evaporated all the tension and sadness from your face. All across the seats were relatives and friends sitting with a nervously happy face. Ironically, he really thought it was going to be you someday.
“You’re [Y/N], right? Everyone always tried to introduce me to you. Now we’re sitting next to each other at Sangyeon’s wedding together! I’m Juyeon by the way.”
59 notes · View notes
stopbeingrude · 3 years
Text
Hi guys , how are you doing ? I hope you had at least a decent day. I was really surprised by how many people were interested in my story. (blush) Im so glad As promised, here's chapter 2 ,, I like the rain, it always seemed like the only thing that was like me…" Chapter 2. ,,Thank you for being here" Juvia looked at the object in her hands that she found while packing for their trip to Tempeville. A tiny umbrella , white with smiling suns printed on it .She remembered vividly the exact moment Jerry had handed it to her. - "Here, this is for you, I couldn't bear to hear you whining anymore,"- said the golden-haired man, handing the little girl his gift. -'' I've told you many times, that in time you would be able to control the rain around you. It's normal for water to behave strangely around water mages, and I had a problem with it too….- said Jerry. The man thought for a moment, then added. -..I'm pretty sure I told you how I nearly drowned my ex girlfriend….I told you, right?.. "- little girl nodded-"...Of course I did…haha..If only you could see that bitc...yh...lady's face….Where was I at again?............Oh right!... If only you were just a bit more patient, little froggy.." -"I told you not to call me that, you dummy! "- shouted the seemingly angry Juvia. It was obvious that she wasn't angry, but if those were supposed to be birthday wishes , then that this old slacker could have tried a little harder. -''Oi! Brat....I'm trying my best to wish you a happy birthday and you act like this? -" What kind of birthday wishes are these supposed to be!?- the girl exclaimed. -..Unbelievable! Young people these days are so ungrateful….Ugh .."- he complained, but eventually gave up. -" Heh... Alright….Im sorry... Happy Birthday Juju…- he said with a grin. He couldn't stay angry with his baby for too long. - "...I wish you happiness, health,...I hope you'll grow up to be a decent and intelligent woman ... because remember this..., it's not how you look that counts, it's what's in your head…. - the man poked her forehead lightly, causing the girl to giggle. Despite the tough character of her ..guardian ...? I guess you could call him that… despite his difficult sense of humour and his biting remarks, she knew that she was important to him, just as he was important to her. He just had a strange way of showing affection... Juvia laughed lightly despite a few tears that flowed from her sapphire eyes. It was for moments like this , she's been able to endure the bullying of other children , she knew that every sad experience ended with a visit from Jerry. Every visit ended with one of his strange ideas that always put a smile back on her face, like that one time he took her out for hot dogs at 10pm. Juvia was never able to forget the look on the orphanage ladies' faces when Jerry walked her back at 1 am. Lost in her thoughts, she didn't notice when her fiancé appeared in their bedroom. -" I've never seen this one…"- he pointed at the umbrella- ''.. I'm guessing it's a special one then" -he stated, handing her tea. - "Thank you... "- she took a sip-"...Yes you're right... actually it was a present for my birthday. HE gave it to me…" After packing the last things, they both sat down on the bed. Neither of them was quite sure how to start a conversation. Gray didn't like the strange atmosphere that had prevailed in their apartment since yesterday. But most of all he did not like how distant Juvia seemed to be. That wasn't his Juvia. Devil Slayer rested his head on her shoulder. When Blue-haired woman began to gently stroke his hair, he immediately relaxed . He missed that... After what for him felt like ages , she decided to speak. -"Juvia is sorry that she didn't tell you anything...Juv….. I was just trying to forget about it... it's not like I don't trust you....Please don't be angry…"-she said in an uncertain voice. -"I'm not angry at you….I'm just a little disappointed...I thought you felt comfortable enough with me to tell me everything…"- he admitted. It was silly to admit , but he didn't
like the fact that Juvia wouldn't tell him something. He knew that everyone had the right to have their own secrets, but his desire to find out what was in her head was much stronger. After a while he decided to ask her more - "Is there anything else you haven't told me about yourself?" He needed to know. -" No. Everything else is true…About my childhood, about Phantom Lord...and mostly about my parents..." …………………………. -".........What happened to your parents...?"- he asked quietly. He contemplated for a moment whether he should ask her this question. After all, he didn't know what kind of reaction this would cause.. -" My mother died when I was about 2 years old.... I don't know who my father was... Jerry said he never met him…about my mother.."- Juvia looked as if she was thinking very hard about something, and after a moment she added-"..Jerry once told me that even she couldn't remember who he exactly was….not that she cared about it or about being pregnant …"- said Juvia weirdly. Wait , what? -"..L-let me get this straight…...you're trying to tell me….that she didn't really care that she got pregnant...and that she wasn't even trying to look for your father? ' Wait, what !?' -….ymm... that's....." - the man persistently tried to choose the right words. He did not want to offend his fiancée's mother by any means (If not for her , Juvia wouldn't be there in the first place, so she obviously deserved to be at least respected)....But everything Juvia had mentioned sounded...How to put it?...Concerning? -" It's not normal... I know... you don't have to hold back Darling- she said with a slight smile- "Her name was Eliana and apparently she was always like...that..., she was...well DIFFERENT.."- that's how Jerry would always describe her-"....She didn't really care about anything, she didn't talk too much, she rarely showed any kind of emotion....She was one big secret, even for him. Juvia never fully got it. Why would she be like that with the person she supposedly was…… ..ymm…..Close.?"- he didn't miss the way she said the last word, but he kept quiet about it. After all ,the relationship between two strangers wasn't his business. Gray decided to change the subject a bit. -"You know..., I think it's really great of him to take care of both of you.…"-despite the fact that the night before Gray had felt a lot of anger towards the aforementioned man, right now he was grateful that he had taken both ladies under his care.- "He must have been an amazing person. It really sounds like you are telling me about some hero or saint"- ice mage smiled - "He was "- said blunette with a smile - "I will always be grateful to him...But Saint ? No, no ,no...That's probably too much of an exaggeration." - she added with a giggle. Gray was glad that she was laughing again, he couldn't help but laugh a little too. They are slowly returning to normalcy... - "He was the laziest, most stubborn man you could find on this planet….He was untactful , brutally honest and worst of all, sometimes he could be so awfully mean and grumpy , especially when it was Tuesday...Juvia never got that...why Tuesday?….Dear God , he could be so unbearable...."- Juvia stopped for a moment, then smiled playfully.- "Honestly you two are pretty similar in that case" - "Ekhem....So.. you're suggesting that I'm mean and grumpy ? Oh ..Alright... I'll remember that when you want something from me..."- Gray said, pretending to be offended and trying hard not to smile. Juvia laughed loudly, then wrapped her arms around his neck and placed a sweet kiss on his lips. After Jerry disappeared, she was sure she would never get attached to anyone again. She didn't want to suffer more. But as we all know, life likes to surprise us, and "never" is not eternal. First she met Gajeel , with whom, by some strange coincidence, she found a connection. Funny, considering how different they were. Even then a quiet voice in her head, similar to Jerry's, whispered to her to not get too attached….that it didn't make sense. On that day, for the first time in her
life, she decided to ignore it, and thanks to that, she gained a wonderful friend. The same situation happened again after she met Gray and Fairy tail. The insistent voice kept reminding her of the past. 'Just because you've miraculously found a friend who hasn't left you, doesn't mean that it will happen again...' 'So what if he stopped your rain, one day you'd be able to deal with it by yourself…..Besides, don't you remember what happened the last time you felt something for a guy? It's just stupid, meaningless crush, just get over it....' But as time passed and she became more and more attached to the guild mates, more and more in love with Gray..... The voice in her head gradually faded and after a while the only sound she heard was the laughter of her loved ones. Despite the suffering of the past, Juvia no longer regretted anything. She would go through it even 100 more times, just to be happy with her new family. -"Oi ! - she felt Gray lightly tap her nose- Juvs don't fall asleep, we have a train in about two hours….. Remember? "- he asked amused - "You're right! Juvia's sorry, she got lost in her thoughts…" ****************************************** - "Are you going on a mission ?" asked Mira Jane cheerfully, as the couple informed her of their departure. Gray didn't necessarily want to share with her the reason for their trip. After all, it was a rather sensitive topic. - "Yyyy it's more like..... a..vacation...?...Right Juvia?"- he turned to his fiancée - "Oh!....Yes, yes..."- nodded the woman. The barmaid looked at them with a huge smile. She still couldn't quite believe that these two were finally together.… - "In that case I wish you a wonderful time, lovebirds" - she giggled as she saw them both turning red. - "Ooh vacation? That's awesome, wish you a great time guys." -they heard Lucy's voice behind them. - "They are such a beautiful couple."- added Erza proudly-" I can't believe that our Gray has grown so much..I hope you'll have an amazing vacation." - '"I also wish you an amazing time'' -said Wendy happily. -Ohhh..young love…- sang Happy, flying over their heads. - " And where are you two going anyway?"- asked Natsu curiously while finishing his lunch. - "We decided to visit my hometown,"- said Juvia. Her friends didn't need to know more... - "Oh cool..Where is it?" -continued Natsu. He never really thought much about where his guild-mate came from.. -" I don't think that's your business Flame-brain. Besides you probably wouldn't know where it is anyway." -said Gray, slightly annoyed. He was slowly starting to get on his nerves. Why does Natsu always have to meddle in things that are not his own? - "I asked Juvia ,not you Icy-pants" said Natsu teasingly. Jeez what's wrong with Droopy eyes today , he just asked a simple question. - "Calm down both of you "- said Lucy. She didn't like where this conversation was going. -'' Lucy is right, there is no point in arguing....Natsu if you really want to know, Juvia was born in the town of Tempeville, in the south - said Juvia, trying to calm down quickly. - "Oh, I've never heard of that place," Natsu said, surprised. Looks like there's a lot of towns he didn't know about. - "See, I told you so,"- said Gray. "Now if you'll excuse us, we have a train to catch. So let's get going… - "Hey Lucy, Happy, let's go with them...I'd like to see what that place is like "- said Natsu suddenly, dragging the blonde with him. His girlfriend looked at him in horror. 'Natsu, what are you thinking? Are you trying to ruin their trip?' - "The hell?! "- shouted Gray. And then he thought that everything was going well…'Please no….' - "Natsu, that's their private vacation! "- exclaimed Lucy, knowing very well that they should leave the couple alone- "Besides, they said they have a train coming soon!" -"Then let's go , we have to get ready quickly…...!" "LEAVE US ALONE !!' - desperate Gray shouted as loud as he could, unintentionally focusing the attention of practically the entire guild. They all looked at him, disapproval clearly written on
their faces. - "Gee..Buddy..you don't have to be so rude," - said Max. - "My God… what's with you?- whispered Lisanna - "Exactly Gray, what kind of behavior is that? "- Erza asked in a stern tone- "If you don't want Natsu to come with you, just tell him politely. The Devil Slayer wanted to disappear... It wasn't supposed to be like this. He turned his gaze towards his fiancée, silently asking for any kind of rescue. However, he was met with the same horrified gaze. After a moment, the girl bowed her head slightly and said to the rest of the guild. -"Everyone , please forgive us, especially Gray. I don't know what's going on with him lately...." - ' Huh ?'- Gray must have heard that wrong….There is no way... -"....He's been very tired and stressed lately, probably because of work, that's why we decided to go on vacation…..Juvia didn't know what to do...." said Juvia, brilliantly pretending to be distraught. 'Stop making me out to be some kind of aggressive freak,' Gray shouted in his mind 'Juvia is sorry but this is kinda your fault'- thought blunette , while taking a look at her lover. - "Relax Juvia, you don't have to apologize to us... To be honest Natsu tried to force his way into your trip" - said Lucy, looking at her partner with an annoyance. - Sorry Juvia….-said the pink haired boy meekly-"...but the ice princess can kiss my ass. I won't apologize to him.." -he added quietly. - "It honestly sounds like an excuse to leave you alone so you can shag in peace" -said Cana under her breath. She wanted to add something else but then she felt a murderous gaze of the black-haired man and decided to shut up. -"True!"- added Gajeel, receiving a look full of indignation from his best friend. -"That's so MANLY" - "How could you blame them though….." -laughed Macao. -"GOODBYE !" - shouted Fullbuster blushing furiously ,as he headed straight to the door, dragging his equally embarrassed lover with him. As they walked towards the train station, dragging their suitcases behind them, blunette suddenly asked… - "Did you really do this...to be all alone with me....?" asked Juvia innocently. Oh how she loved teasing him like that... -"JUVIA ?! "- At this point Gray was close to having a heart attack. A very amused girl could not stop laughing for a while , until they got on the train and they sat down in one of the wagons. Their journey has just begun. ****************************************** Very random/ unnecessary bonus . Remember this, Lovelies! Never doodle under the influence of alcohol, you will get wierd ideas lol. ,, Do you see this sh*t Juvia? People are fighting over fictional characters… Humanity really is getting dumber and dumber...."
Tumblr media
31 notes · View notes
Text
im rewatching jatp instead of studying for the 3 tests i have tomorrow and i thought i would share my thoughts and reactions with each episode so enjoy!!....
wake up
- hearing the “1, 2, 3″ at the start of the episode gives me more serotonin than my antidepressants ever will
- julie’s slippers...that’s it...that’s the thought
- that dry ass pasta the molina’s are eating for dinner??? someone needs to give my man ray some cooking tips or a cookbook... something
-the looks the boys give julie when she says it was an OLD cd she found. as if they could be old??
-the entire julie and luke kitchen scene i mean there are no words to describe how much i am in love with scene. the banter, the flirting, luke giving this girl he literally just met an actual PIECE OF HIS SOUL so she can get music back into her life. not a single time have i watched that scene and not felt my heart literally grow cause of how cute they are. 
-the entire scene when julie is singing wake up. that scene is what made me literally CRAVE watching the other episodes. like of course i was going to watch them cause i wasn’t gonna just stop watching a show after one episode, and yes the show was good already but seeing the lighting and her voice, and just everything about the scene,,,,*chef’s kiss* 
bright
-flynn drinking seven sodas....SEVEN??? i would be throwing up if i drank more than like 2 and she drank seven,,,no ma’am.
- flynn and her trumpet. talented queen
- “ i wouldn’t have given you the song if i didnt think you were gonna rock it.” lmaooo im crying:)
- i start tearing up every time julie goes to play the first notes of bright,,, and then i’m full on bawling when the guys come in and play with her cause...they weren’t playing to be seen they were playing to be there for her and play to comfort her. pls i love them<3
- nick vibing in the front row
- the tech guy deserves so much more praise
flying solo
- reggie’s little butt shake or whatever you wanna call it!!
- julie’s little laugh when she yells at the guys to stop it
- “and we’re on the runway again” GENUINELY one of my favorite lines of the whole show pls i love luke’s humor
-this is the first time i noticed this but reggie’s face after alex says “DONT TELL ME HOW TO GHOST!”
-WILLIE!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE YOU<3333333
-the slow mo helmet take off,,,,me too alex me too
-willie’s little giggles:))))
- “oh-oh!”
- “no clue” alex i love you baby<3
- next season better give us a scene of flynn throwing eggs at someone’s house because i think it’s safe to say we were robbed of that experience. 
- the flying solo performance is just amazing
i got the music
- just the whole opening scene is so cute ....the dancing, singing, happiness RADIATING from julie 
-nick in an all white suit and fedora
-WILLEX MUSEUM DATE YEAH BABYYYYY
- carefree skateboarder bf and anxiety ridden drummer bf
- yelling. in. museums. 
-alex thinking he’s literally dying again because of the salt... zero braincells in this band.
- another scene we were robbed of that i need to see in season 2...reggie singing “home is where my horse is” while alex and julie sit patiently and attentively listen to him but luke looks like he’s about to commit murder
- i get SO MUCH second hand embarrassment for julie when she looks through luke’s songbook and says “ wow luke I didn’t know you were such a romantic” julie baby i love you but...eekkkkk
- “he looks like a substitute teacher”- where did he come up with that like so many other things he could be compared to but a substitute teacher??
- “luke introduced you to rock” heck yeah it did.. literal soulmates
- would like to see a picture of the raccoon in Flynn’s backyard
- wee woo wee woo police sirens://///
- julie’s outfit ughhhh i love it
- the poster that im pretty sure says “sexiest role” behind caleb... why was that necessary 
the other side of hollywood
- THE ENTIRE PERFORMANCE OF THE OTHER SIDE OF HOLLYWOOD 
- i lose my absolute shit over this song omg literal chills
- the cape grab i cannot physically do this rn
- willie being so excited the entire performance and looking over to see alex’s reaction
- reggie being in awe everytime one of the girls performing does something.. me too reggie
-”well i wouldn't really call it mAAgiCcCC bUT”
- nick and his fedora again
- alex has a crush, alex has a crush on.....WILLIE
-the boys eating food for the first time in 25 years is honestly so realistic
-alex shoving a whole slice of pizza in his mouth
- lukes ‘OH MY GODDDDD’
- reggie kissing his meatball sub that looks painfully dry but also delicious 
- the continuation of the other side of hollywood performance and everyone dancing
-reggie imitating caleb’s evil laugh and owen trying so hard not to break
-me getting mad at the boys for not showing up for julie and being sad with her but at the same time i’m obviously not mad at the boys just...disappointed?? idk 
finally free
- how did julie get to the school if she missed the first three classes?? wasn’t she still at flynn’s house from the night before cause she slept over so did she walk to school or was she just sitting in flynn’s house by herself and one of flynn’s parents was like you gonna go to school or???
-dance class with nicky poo<3
-reggie fixing his amp in the rain
-julie’s blue dress outfit in this episode is my ABSOLUTE favorite 
- the birthday candle scene makes me sob like a little baby,,,and rightfully so
- julie smart, smart to be taking calculus as what a sophomore??
- all eyes on me yes queen iconic
- alex dancing is how i dance in my brain whenever the song comes on 
- finally free as a song is NEVER given enough credit and why not?? it’s my favorite song they do as a band AND the madison’s vocals and the echoing part omg i loveeeee
- and the whole performance with luke’s heart eyes. i count this performance as the moment luke like fell in love with julie...like full on just blown away with how much awe and admiration he has for her in that moment and all the time.
 - julie and luke singing “and you’re a part of me” while staring directly into each others soul,,,yeah that’s love kids
edge of great
- carlos being the ghost hunter he is and tía being done with him
- luke’s pouting face 
- reggie and ray making breakfast together is so wholesome. reggie really loves and seeks comfort in ray and i love that
- luke just waiting next to julie’s locker and his little “hey”
- the first time i watch this scene i thought charlie was from new york cause of the way he says “ i can't do this without you” and then i watched the cast interviews and just realized he is somewhat joey tribbiani 
- jealous luke hehehehehhehehe
- “well dont you look shARrP”- yes he does luke thank you very much
- “uh oh i think someone has a crush on julie” yeah you do you little shit,,, now admit it to her
- the proud look on luke’s face when he realizes julie is still paying attention to HIM even though she’s supposed to be having a full on conversation with nick
- the shoulder push ( as someone who has had their own shoulder pushed in the middle of a high school hallway as a weird way of flirting,,,,i can definitely somewhat attest to how luke is feeling in that moment and i too continued to flirt with the person who shoulder shoved me while we were still standing in the hallway)
- the flow from whatever the hell dance nick and julie are doing and the perfect harmony dance is so special to me and i love it
-ADOANCLOBNAOVBCOAB THE HAIR PLSSSSS
- EVERYTIME THE SCENE COMES ON AND I SEE HIM WALKING THROUGH THE MIRROR I HAVE TO PAUSE THE SHOW FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES WHILE I DIE LAUGHING BECAUSE THE HAIR IS SO BAD EVEN THOUGH I SHOULD BE USED TO HOW IT LOOKS AFTER WATCHING THIS SHOW LITERALLY 30 TIMES
- i think people see my username and assume i like his hair in this scene but...ummm fun little fact i do not like it
- the dance is so good though ugh my babies
- the hair
- madison is gorgeous 
- another season 2 scene i need: julie teaching this dance to luke and they perform it in front of alex and reggie so they can see luke roll on the floor like that
-the hair
- the lift i loveeee
- the voices at the end of the song *chef’s kiss*
- the way julie spins out from luke and into nick omg so good
- “thAnKs pArTnER”
- luke denying his feelings for julie,,,babe pls
- the whole edge of great performance is so good and beautiful and the colors are SPECTACULAR 
-julie avoiding luke’s gaze lolz
- can't believe my mans really tried to deny he didn’t have feelings for julie like 5 hours earlier even though he’s getting upset because she hasn’t looked at him in 2 minutes
- THE. GUITAR. RIFF. SOLO.
- when i finally learn how to play the electric guitar well enough to learn the guitar solo... it’s over for everyone
-nick just came to watch the girl he likes perform not watch her flirt with a hologram plssss can we give this man a break next season.
- “we have to say goodbye to julie”- that’s literally more important to luke than not playing music anymore because julie is music to him now
unsaid emily
-already crying and the episode hasn't even started
-willex in the orpheum
- alex literally being OVER reggie
- nope too emotionally unstable to watch this scene right now
- my therapist will be hearing about this tomorrow
- show us the baby picture of luke cowards
- this is such a beautiful song that makes me cry every fucking time gosh damn it
- everytime i watch the flashback scene of luke on his bike i think of “christmas song” by phoebe bridges and i cry even more
- i tried to learn how to play this song on my electric guitar (because i dont have an acoustic guitar) and i ended up crying half way through so i do not think i will be playing it anytime soon:/
- the harmonies *chef’s kiss*
- THE POLICE LIGHTS ....i cry
- FAT tears rolling down my face
- there's literally not a moment i don’t cry during this episode
- interesting little relationship :0
- when i played percussion in 7th grade i used to lay down on the couch in the practice room at school ( which god knows what people did on that couch...ew) and stick my drumsticks up my nose too,,,, just another similarity between alex and i 
stand tall
- willie really drove a bus 200 miles into the desert for his crush
- WILLEX HUG 
- i love willie no last name so much,,,i just wanna hold and protect him
- alex’s ballerina dance
-julie’s overall outfit i love<3
- “im swimming”
- the way carlos hangs up the iPad on tía makes me CRACK UP he’s just lmao bye girl
- another julie outfit i love
- “anything julie. you know that.” AHHHHHAASIDSJFPACISN love bitches
- the suits
- luke’s hair in this episode is so much better than the perfect harmony hair pls
- YOU GOT NOTHING TO LOSE
- the way luke looks so restricted and confined in his suit... but at the same time he looks like a 10 week old puppy
-luke’s AGGRESSIVE but small foot tapping leading up to being on the stage
- the solos:)))))
- crying again over julie’s monologue to her mom
- julie really was brave enough to be ready to perform by herself
-the way Trevor looks at carrie when she says “been here before”
-ALEXXXXXX
-REGGIEEEEE
-luuukkKKKEEEEEEE
- this performance makes me cry
- especially the first time when i saw luke flickering...sobs
- he finally looks free in his suit:))
- alex’s solo is so pretty i love him
- reggie’s solo too 
- nick just straight up vibing the entire performance
- alex and luke holding hands...hehehe cute besties
- “thank you, guys” NO THANK YOU 
- the way julie begs for them to do something about the jolts for HER cause she knows luke would never say no to her
- “no music is worth making, julie, if we’re not making it with you,” I JUST SCREAMED AND IM PRETTY SURE I WOKE UP MY ENTIRE HOUSEHOLD...whoops
- going back to that line i could say so much about it but....for someone who’s life was literally MUSIC for the 17 years he was alive, and after finding out he could play music again even though he was dead and saying it made him feel alive, he would give that up- he would give up playing his guitar, playing in a band with his friends, give up writing and singing music- if he wasn’t doing that with julie. that’s more than saying i love you,,,that’s literally like saying i’d give up my ENTIRE LIFE and what i love to do if i dont get to do it with you
- i just made myself cry with that description...wow
-the hug<3
-also imagine how luke felt in that moment,,, hearing this girl, once again that he would give his life up for, saying in his ear that she loves them. i would motherfucking glow too, luke
- *passionately but gently holds each others faces*
-HANDS OFF MY BABY NICK, CALEB
- caleb’s outfit is....something
- the head turn plssss
this was so long and i am so sorry but if you read this far.....leave some of your own reactions or thoughts:)))
k goodnight im gonna, ugh, finally go study ://
68 notes · View notes
eberles · 4 years
Text
i hate u, i love u
Rafe Cameron
Tumblr media
(gif by @toesure :)
Request: A Rafe fic based on the song “I hate u, I love you” by gnash (ft Olivia O’Brien) PLEASE MAJOR RAFE VIBES 🥺💖 @fav-imagines
A/N: I wanted to cry writing this lol idk why but it hit me right in the feels!! it’s kind of all over the place, if anyone is confused by, don’t worry bc i am too!!!! lol anyways enjoy!! (this is probably the first thing ive ever written that goes with rafe’s character) bold = lyrics, italics = flashbacks
Warnings: angst, mentions of drugs, cheating, lying, toxic relationship, swearing
Tumblr media
feelin used, but im still missin you and i cant see the end of it just wanna feel your kiss against my lips and now all this time is passing by, but i still cant seem to tell you why it hurts me every time i see you, realize how much i need you
I’ve spent months sitting in my room staring at the ceiling, and at the walls. I did a full Bella Swan from New Moon and let 3 months go by without being present for any of them. I didn’t care honestly...Even after spending all that time alone, i’m not still not healed from the heartache that was caused by him. I still miss him, his scent, his kisses, his clothes, everything. Rafe.
I went out once and he was the last person I wanted or planned to see, but of course, he was the only person I actually saw. Sure, there were other people around, but none of them mattered. Everyone else felt greyed out except for him. He was the only light I could see in those short moments. Everything felt like it was moving in slow motion, my breath hitched in my throat and it felt like there was no air left to breathe.
After months it still hurts to see him again. It hurts because I realized I still need him even after everything. I hate him. So why do I love him? The feeling of him being the only one I want, the one nobody could ever replace...it’s overwhelming and I can’t seem to shake it. But me? He replaced. It looked like it was easy from my point of view. He needed her, wanted her, and i’m not her.
i miss you when i can’t sleep or right after coffee or right when i can’t eat, i miss you in my front seat, still got sand in my sweaters from nights we don’t remember. do you miss me like i miss you? fucked around and got attached to you.
My head was consumed on thoughts of you. It was constant. Like the leaky faucet in the bathroom or the loose floorboard. Always running, always broken. I miss you. Maybe you’ll come around, but for now...I wish you were here instead. When it’s late and I can’t sleep, I think about you. When it’s early and I can’t eat, I think about you.
���Where are we going?” you giggled excitedly, grabbing my hand from across the console in my truck.
“Shh, I told you it’s a surprise baby, we’re almost there anyways.” I laughed at her giggling like a kid, she had so much excitement in her eyes. She was always ready for anything, even if it was 2 in the morning and I love that about her. I love everything about her.
“Ugh fine!” she groaned dramatically and rolled her eyes in a full circle looking up at the ceiling. “Why are we at the beach?” you didn’t even give me enough time to answer before jumping out of the truck and running towards the sand laughing the entire way to the water. Once I caught up with you, I grabbed your hands and pulled you close into my chest, kissing your forehead. When we broke apart I laid down a few blankets on the sand, noticing you were cold, I also gave you my sweater.
We stared at the stars and talked about anything and everything for hours. It felt magical. We stayed until the sun came up, watching the sunset before driving back to my house for some much needed rest.
Walking over to my closet, curious to know if that same sweater ended up back in my closet after that night. I reached in, digging around not finding anything and decided to look in my dresser instead. Of course, it was folded neatly in the drawer you used to call yours. Grabbing and shaking it out I noticed the light pieces of sand that fell from it. I brought it in to my nose wondering if it still smelt like your perfume. It did. I’m always tired lately, but never of you. Do you miss me too?
if i pulled a you on you, you wouldn’t like that shit, i put this reel out, but you wouldn’t bite that shit. i type a text then i never mind that shit, i got these feelings, but you never mind that shit. you’re still in love with me but your friends don’t know.
To Y/N: i wanna talk, i think...maybe i miss y-
*delete*
To Rafe: I miss you so much, it hurt someti-
*delete*
“Y/N...what’s going on? You’re off in never never land! Do you still miss him?” Kiara asked, gently shaking my knee to gain my attention back to the group. I looked at her and around at the rest of the pogues and put a smile on my face, shaking my head.
“Of course not, it’s been months! I’m so over him, guys. Besides even if I did, it wouldn’t matter.” I tried so hard to sound confident. I hope they bought it. Of fucking course, I miss Rafe. I’m still in love with him for gods sake. I hate that I want him.
✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿
Sure, i’ve moved on, but I think about y/n, just about everyday. I guess for me, moving on is finding someone new, but not actually wanting anyone new. I just couldn’t bare to be alone anymore with my thoughts. I deserve better than that, personally.
“Anyways Topper, if y/n wanted me still, she would say so right?” I looked at Topper, silently hoping he would lie to me, just tell me what I want to hear, man. “If I were her, I would’ve never let me go. She’s missing out.”
“Hell yea, dude! That’s the right attitude.” Topper said, jumping up to high five me. Of course, that was the statement he was on board with. I hate that I want you.
✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿
I haven’t been to a party in months, Kiara and Sarah thought that this would be the most fitting post-break up activity for me. Maybe meet a new guy or something. I tuned out when they were telling me about it and just agreed. What I neglected to listen to, was that it was a kook party. So now, i’m at a party alone, since my friends ditched me to dance with each other. And on top of that, I watch him watch her, like she’s the only girl he’s ever seen.
It took less than an hour of being at this party for us to end up in a room alone together.
“You don’t care! You never did!” Rafe shouted, running his hands through his hair, clearly exasperated with this conversation. I don’t even know how it started. One minute I was watching him with another girl, and the next he was hauling me off, away from everyone.
“You don’t give a damn about me, Rafe! How is it you never notice that you’re slowly killing me?” you wanted to yell back at him, to scream at him for putting you through this again, but you couldn’t. He didn’t say anything in return so you continued, “I hate you, and I hate that I love you, Rafe.” I’ve tried to move on, but even the simple thought of dating anyone but him, makes me physically ill. Why does it have to be like this?
“I don’t mean no harm, I just miss you on my arm, babe. Do you ever wonder what we could’ve been y/n?” He’s taunting me by asking dumb questions, as if I wanted this to happen, as if i’m the cause of all of this. Rafe’s the one that was closed off, not me. Of course, he switches the stories and i’m sure everyone at this damn party thinks I left him heart broken.
“You have a girlfriend, why are you even asking me that?” I was starting to get angry, I felt like he was toying with me.
He’s laughing. Of fucking course, he’s laughing at me. This is all one big fucking joke to him. “Lie to me, lie with me, get your fucking fix. Isn’t that what you always told your friends Rafe?” I was furious, how could he act that way after everything? He’s still a child though, that will never change.
✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿
You were right. I did lie to you, multiple times. About where I was, who I was with, what I was doing. I didn’t want you to know I was such a fuck up. You didn’t deserve the pain of finding out I was lying and cheating and drugging. You did anyways though. Now all my drinks and all my feelings are all fucking mixed.
“Rafe! Come dance with me!” I downed the rest of my drink before throwing the glass down and walking away from the new girl I was seeing. I didn’t care anymore.
I don’t want you, Y/N. I shouldn’t fucking miss you. I don’t deserve to! Seeing you again is such bullshit. If you wouldn’t have shown up here, I wouldn’t have said those things to you. Sometimes you gotta burn some bridges, just to create some distance. You didn’t deserve that, I knew it, but at least now you might learn your lesson and stay away. It’s for the best, right?
I hate that I love her, but I can’t put nobody else above her.
✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿
I wasn’t sure if I had the closure I needed, but after that particular conversation with Rafe I felt a little better. I returned to the party with my head held high and danced with my friends. I hoped he was watching me too since i’m not sure what he was trying to do by joking around at my expense. But maybe if he thinks it didn’t bother me he will know how it fucking feels. 
I learned from my dad that it’s good to have feelings when love and trust is gone. I guess this is moving on. I hate you, I love you.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
231 notes · View notes
space-and-galaxies · 3 years
Text
wrote a fic for my set after series but its not showing up in the tag so im posting on main 
Link
Alternative to ao3: 
The lawn of the mansion was more packed than usual but that didn't stop Donald from seeking the boys out with his eyes, it was second nature to him at this point honestly. He found them together -which didn't surprise him in the least-, looking rattled, seemingly searching for something. That something didn't have a word for itself but he knew what it was, and he also knew it was now Della's job to provide that. And that didn't bother him anymore, he was glad the boys had their mom- it was all he had ever wanted for them. But that meant facing a hard truth- he wasn't the one taking care of them anymore. He had come to terms with that by now and he was okay with it, the boys deserved to have an actual parent in their lives, not just an uncle they had to settle for. No matter how much he had wanted them. No matter how much he had thought of them as his kids. They weren't, not really, and now he had the chance to have his own kids.
So why did it feel so wrong?
He watched as Della went over to them, offering comforting and reassurance, but they didn't even register it which made him frown. They had been receptive to her before- well, Louie had taken longer than his brothers but now he adored her just as much, what had changed?
Scrooge apparently had noticed as well and also made his way over to them, trying to help but the same thing happened. His frown deepened, something was going on here. Before he even realized what he was doing he was going over there and bending down to the triplets level, he tried to ask them what was going on but they hugged him before he could get a word out. He easily wrapped all three of them up in his arms and rubbed their backs, whispering soft reassurances to them.
"This is all over now, right? They're not gonna attack our family anymore?" Huey asked; the three of them looked at him wanting comfort.
"It's over." Donald confirmed. And that was true, F.O.W.L had been disbanded once and for all, and even if one or two people tried something it wouldn't as bad as today was. "It's okay now, boys, everyone's okay." He stared up at his Uncle and sister who were watching the scene with an ineffable look, "Right?" He told them promptingly.
"Right." They both quickly responded.
The boys seemed placated by that and let him go, "Thanks, Uncle Donald."
"Of course." They took off after that, probably to find the other kids and he turned back to the other two. "What?" He asked, noting their looks hadn't changed. They jumped out of it.
"Nothing. How did you know what to do?"
He shrugged, "Practice. Experience. Knowing them better than they know themselves. Of course they’re on edge, two of their own were taken today.” Speaking of, where was...? He found Webby talking to Mrs. B and smiled, good, they both needed that.
"Yeah, but," Della shook her head but continued at the stare he gave her. "They responded to you." They did, didn't they? He tried to give her an answer for that but found he didn't have one himself. Why did they do that? They had Della now, she was all they had ever wanted- they had tried to hide it from him but he knew how to read them exceptionally well and really couldn't blame them. He raised them but he wasn't a parent, they wanted a parent. And now there were two little girls who wanted a parent as well, and maybe he could be that for them. And that was okay, the boys had Della, he had the chance to be an actual parent, everything worked out in the end.
Right?
______________________________________________________________
That night he went back to the houseboat, normally after big events like this he liked to be near his family but he still had some packing to do. He and Daisy were planning on waiting a few days for things to settle down -and taking the time to get May and June things they would need- before leaving, but there was still a lot he had to pack. They were coming back eventually, but he didn't know how long they'd be gone and it was better to be safe than sorry. He didn't know why he had ever thought he could move away permanently, today had reminded him of how much he loved his family, and how much he hated the thought of being separated from any of them for too long. Constant adventuring did funny things to the brain he supposed.
He was cut out of his thoughts by a knock at the door and tilted his head, letting out a 'huh'. "Come in!" He shouted figuring it would be Della, wanting him to come back inside the mansion or just wanting to be near him after what almost happened to him. Imagine his surprise when three figures stepped into the room. "Boys." He blinked. "You know you never have to knock. What's up?" They were about to answer when they noticed him packing,
Dewey tilted his head, "What're you doing?" Oh right, here came the hard part. They didn't need him as much anymore, but he still couldn't imagine them taking him leaving very well.
"Packing."
"You're still leaving?" Louie asked quietly.
Donald gave them a shaky smile, “Yeah, you three have Della and Scrooge now.”
“That doesn’t mean we don’t need you too.” Huey protested; his brothers nodded in agreement and Donald's smile grew more genuine.
"It's not forever, I could never leave our family forever. It's just a little vacation, after everything that's happened it's long overdue. But I'll still have my phone on me- anytime you want to call me you can, for any reason. And we're not leaving for a few days, there's no way Della would let that happen." He said with a chuckle.
The three of them looked at each other, having one of their numerous silent conversations. "Can we sleep here tonight?"
He softened instantly, "Of course you can." He then noticed how late it was so he decided to stop packing for the night and moved everything off to the side so the boys could climb in the hammock. Once the four of them were situated he began humming, hoping that would lull them to sleep and pulled them close to him, needing some form of grounding and knowing they needed it too. It had been a long day for all of them, so he prayed with every inch of him that they were able to sleep through the night.
Only a few hours passed before he woke up. He was greatly intuned to any signs of distress from the boys so when he noticed what woke him he wasn't surprised at all. Dewey was having some sort of nightmare and was muttering something in his sleep, but he quickly grew louder. "Dad!" He called out, still not waking up. Oh. Oh.
It was like everything just suddenly fell into place. That was what felt so wrong, he already had his own kids, they were just as much his as they were Della's- maybe even more. He was their Dad, he had always been their Dad, in everything but name. But what was a name anyways? Just a label, there were more important things that determined people's significance to one another. He raised them, he was there for them when no one else was, protected and defended them from everything that could hurt them, no matter how small or infinitesimal -it didn't matter to him, as long as there was a chance they could get hurt he was there-, and maybe that was all that mattered. Names weren't important, actions were.  
Dewey was getting more restless so Donald figured this wasn't a nightmare he could wake himself up from and did it himself. He jolted up, panting, and Donald quickly but gently grabbed him in a hug and started to soothe him; the movement woke the other two up. "Ugh, what's going on?" Louie sleepily mumbled. "Dewey?" He asked, more awake when he noticed where his brother was. Dewey just shook his head.
"He had a bad dream." Donald explained and Huey and Louie shared a look which he understood almost too well, Dewey was the least likely of them to get nightmares, when he did it meant something was really wrong. Of course, today had been, something, so it hadn't been surprising in the least that one of them had gotten one, but the fact that it had been him was especially worrying. "Do you want to talk about it?" He asked once he calmed down.
"It was just about what happened today." Dewey said quietly. "I know I couldn't say anything but it was really scary." Donald hummed, with Huey gone the oldest brother roll had fallen on him and it was something he had always taken very seriously. Louie pressed his head into his brother's and Huey wrapped them up in a hug of his own.
Donald smiled. "You were very brave today, all of you were, I am so proud of you." The look they gave him in return did funny things to his heart.
What was he doing? He couldn't just leave them, they needed him- probably more than they needed anyone else, besides each other, he saw that now. But May and June needed a parent too, only now he wasn't so sure that he could be it, or that he really wanted to be. That sounded bad, but four kids were more than enough for him, besides, those girls deserved a quiet life after everything they had been through and he didn't think he could provide that- adventuring was just as a part of him as it was the rest of his family. But he still needed an actual break from it, he still needed this trip, and looking down at the boys all huddled against him he realized that they needed it too. Hmmm...
The next morning was just as hectic as you'd expect the morning after taking down an evil secret organization to be, breakfast fire and all. Donald quickly threw the food into the pool and the four of them watched it sink to the bottom. The boys started laughing after a few moments and he fondly let out a few chuckles, "Okay, no more experimenting with food in small places." Huey's brothers looked at him teasingly and he playfully shoved them.
"So what dewey dew for breakfast now?"
"Ummm..." Donald said as he noticed Daisy walk into the backyard; the triplets looked at each other and quietly excused themselves, they could just find something in the mansion. Daisy smiled at them as they passed her then made her way on the boat, giving Donald a peck on the cheek as soon as she reached him. He blushed and rubbed his neck, "We need to talk. Not that talk!" He hurriedly added on when he noticed her look. "It's, umm, about our trip." She looked at him understandingly and gestured to the houseboat.
Once the two of them got settled on the couch he started talking, "I've been thinking, a lot, I don't think I can go on it with you- or May or June. It doesn't, it doesn't feel right, I mean, the triplets need me, I can't just leave them. I know they have Della and Scrooge now, but they just don't respond to them like they do me. And after everything they've been through.... they just need to be around someone who really understands them." He rubbed his neck. "And well, after raising them for ten years that's me."
She grabbed his free hand, "It's okay, Donald, I understand. They're your boys. Actually," He tilted his head at her, intrigued. "I've been talking to May and June and while they really like you, we've agreed that it might be best if they be in an environment they can truly heal in, so I think I'm gonna take them in."
"Daisy..." He said with awe.
"I want to, Donald, you've really rubbed off on me. Watching you with the triplets, and Webby... well, it's one of the reasons I like you so much. I know I can do for those girls what you've done for the four of them. Besides, it might be a little too soon for us to do something like this. But someday, I would absolutely love to go with you."  
Donald stared at her completely enamored, "How did I get so lucky?"
She squeezed his hands, "I'm the lucky one." They smiled at each other and she continued, "Anyway, I just wanted to stop by and tell you that, and to see about postponing the trip myself, I really think right now they just need peace and quiet- or as much of that as they can get in Duckberg. Go be with your boys, Donald, I'm not going anywhere." He grinned at her and they shared a kiss, god he loved her. Loved? Yeah, yeah, he loved her. He really did.
He walked her to the front door of the mansion, giving her one last kiss then bent down to hug May and June. The two of them shared a hug with Webby and then they and Daisy were off. Donald looked down at Webby, "Had breakfast yet, Kiddo?" She shook her head so they made their way to the kitchen. "How are you feeling after everything?"
"Good, I talked to Granny and Uncle Dad Scrooge." He hummed, not commenting on the 'Uncle Dad' part, some things took a while to get used to, he knew that better than anyone. "And sure, some things have changed but the important things haven't, and that's what matters! Plus, now I'm really a member of this family!"
"Webby, you always were." He told her sincerely; she beamed and hugged him.
______________________________________________________________
When they got to the kitchen he was surprised to see everyone else in there, Mrs. Beakley was making breakfast -which was not a surprise- and Scrooge was helping her. Della was attempting to help as well but was being shooed away and the boys were giggling at her. Donald's heart hadn't felt so full in a long while. He sat down next to them while Webby went to help and was allowed to, much to Della's chagrin. "How come she gets to?!"
"She's never burnt the kitchen down making cereal, dear." Mrs. Beakley told her and she pouted but went to sit down.
Louie nudged Huey, "So that's where you get it from." Dewey let out a gasp and Huey rolled his eyes at them. "Where did Aunt Daisy go?" Louie then asked, looking around.
"Oh she took May and June back to her's, where they're gonna be staying from now on." The triplets glanced at each other. "They've been through a lot, we've both agreed that this is what's best for them."
Della turned to him, "Wait I thought you guys were taking them on your trip?"
"Yeah, we're not doing that anymore...." The kitchen fell silent and the others shared glances with one another. Finally, Huey spoke up,
"It's because of us, isn't it?" He asked quietly, looking down; his brothers did the same.
Donald sighed, "Yes and no," He said honestly. "Last night made me realize some things, mainly how silly I was thinking I could ever leave you three for more than a few hours." They jerked their heads up. "You said it yourselves- you need me, and what kind of Uncle would I be if I ignored that? Not the kind I want to be, that's for sure." Saying Uncle felt off, but that was a conversation for another time.
The boys shared another look, "Speaking of last night," Dewey said awkwardly, playing with his fingers. "I might've called you Dad in my sleep." Oh, guess it was another time already. "I don't know if you heard, but I wanted to apologize anyways, I know you don't like it when we call you that."
"What!" Della said, making everyone turn to her. "Why don't you let them call you that, Donald? You're the one who raised them for the first ten years of their lives. Okay, yeah, maybe you thought them calling you that would replace me in some way, but I'm here now and I'm telling you that you are their Dad- I couldn't think of a better person to have that name for them. Or a better person to be doing this parenting thing with."
"Well, that was something else I realized last night- when you said that, Dewey, everything just clicked." Donald admitted. "I've had my problems with it before, but if you three want to call me Dad I'm more than okay with it." The triplets grinned and hugged him, he gladly reciprocated with a grin of his own while Della looked at them fondly. After that breakfast was served and everyone ate, sitting around the kitchen table. It was crowded, but they wouldn't have it any other way. As they ate Donald noticed Della kept glancing at him and he raised an eyebrow at her but she just turned back to her food. Huh, wonder what that was about?
Once breakfast was finished and the kitchen was clean everyone went their separate ways for the day, well most of everyone. The boys caught up with Donald and he looked at them curiously. "So you're not going on your trip anymore.....?"
Ah, that was what this was. "Daisy and I agreed that it was too soon for us, besides, May and June need most of her attention right now and you three need mine." He paused for a moment considering something and then continued. "Actually, I still want to go on it- I really do need a vacation, but how would you like it if the four of us went instead?" The triplets looked at one another, their expressions almost entirely unreadable. "Take your time, I'm not in any hurry. And whatever you decide I'll be fine with, it's just a suggestion."
"How long would we be gone?" Huey asked.
"Not that long, a few months a most. Just a small break, you three weren't raised like me and Della and I can tell this constant adventuring is getting to you." He bent down to their level. "I just want you to be okay." They had another silent conversation then turned to him,
"We're in."
The next few days were as hectic as that morning had been, and between the packing and the planning Donald hadn't really had any time to himself. But that was okay with him, alone time was overrated. The boys were slowly getting more and more excited and that excitement was infectious, and not just with him, after they had told the others the updated plan and after some hesitance they got excited as well. Sure, it would be hard for the family to be split up but they could tell how much the four of them needed this. However, there was one person who wasn't as excited, and as Donald loaded his car up he knew he had to talk to her.
He walked up to the step she was sulking on and sat next to her. "Dells, I know you just got back to us and how hard this will be, but I promise I'm not trying to take them from you."
She looked at him, "No I know that, they need us, you need this, but now it's my brother and my boys." He nodded understandingly. "I would come with you, but I know you haven't had any real time with them since you moved into the mansion, and I also know how much all four of you miss that. I'll be okay, eventually; who knows, maybe this'll be good for me too? Ever since I've been back I've been so focused on being their Mom, I need to remember who I am outside of that."
"I'm proud of you."
"And I'm proud of all of us." Louie let out a groan from behind them and they laughed as they turned to him. "Everything good to go, Honey?" He nodded, then hesitated for a moment before hugging her. She let out a small surprised noise and hugged him back, they were joined by his brothers a few seconds later. "You three be good for your Dad, okay? Don't give him too hard of a time."
"Yes, Mom." They chorused, though everyone knew that it wouldn't happen, then started saying goodbye to the others. Donald turned to his sister and gave her a hug of his own,
"I'll miss you, don't get on Scrooge's nerves without me." She chuckled, ignored Scrooge's squawk, then asked if he was sure he was sure about this. "Yeah. I love Daisy, but the boys are my adventure. They always will be.” And then it was his turn to say goodbye to everyone else. Mrs. B's was short and to the point, but was filled with love just like everything else she did for her family, Webby's was longer and more emotional, brimming with assurances and promises to do stuff together when he and the boys got back. Scrooge's, Scrooge's was different, and in a way might've been the hardest one.
"Uncle Scrooge."
"Donald Duck."
"Oh come on, just hug each other already!" Della shouted; they looked at one another before doing so. Donald would never admit it, but he had always loved his Uncle's hugs, they felt like home. This hug, in particular, was especially comforting.
"Ae know ae dinnae say it much, but ae am proud o' yew, Nephew. Yew've grown inta such an admirable man and yew've done such a good job with the triplets. Ae know ae'm hard on yew sometimes, but that's just because ae want ta see yew succeed, and yew have- far beyond what ae had ever hoped. Have fun on yer trip, yew deserve it."
Donald choked back tears, "Thanks, Uncle Scrooge. I know I act like I don't care, but your approval has always meant the most to me. I owe a lot of who am I today to you. Thank you for being a good Uncle, to all of us." The rest of the family joined the hug, not one dry eye in sight, and then Donald and the boys were off. They all waved to each other until the car went out of view then Donald looked at his boys through the rearview mirror,
"You three ready for this?"
"Yeah." They were ready for anything.
16 notes · View notes
catnippackets · 4 years
Note
have you seen/would u recommend pacific rim 2? ive heard some things about newt and idk lol
I feel like Im in the minority that actually did think pru was fun but that being said it ended SO abruptly and with like three separate plotlines completely abandoned that I was really frustrated for days after watching it until I had processed everything and had time to think deeply about it lol it just seemed rly unfinished?? it feels like it was deliberately made as 1/2 of two sequels and there needs to be one more to tie everything up. actually I’m gonna ramble abt this bc I have a lot of thoughts (obvs spoilers under the cut)
the thing about the second one was that I genuinely was enjoying it right up until it ended because I swear to god the moment the end screen went up I yelled "what the fuck, that's it?" out loud into my bedroom bc I was so SHOCKED that THAT'S how it all ended, because it just seemed so incomplete?? Like it seemed like one half of a story, that will only be made whole if there's a third one to tie up all the plotlines that they didn't go through with in the second and if that's the case then I will be completely fine with it but if it doesn't or if they dont have a third one at all I will stay so frustrated lol. one silver lining to this is that the vibe of this movie was so different from the first that it almost feels easy to separate it and just imagine it as an AU if you prefer which is sort of nice; usually if a piece of media I like does something bad I feel all gutted and anxious and terrible that this is the canon I have to accept, but something abt this movie just made it feel like it was sort of a totally separate deal. maybe cuz only 3 of the original characters were in it idk
to start off: I felt like there were a couple of plotlines in it that were just sort of introduced and then never seen through which was very ????? Amara & Vik's weird hate-rivalry thing was one of them; Vik instantly has it out for Amara bc she’s jealous, which is a very interesting concept, and then this prompts Amara to become hostile right back at her, which is also a very interesting concept, and then it never got resolved at all? like they couldve done something really cool with those two but it just never went anywhere. and then there was sort of a weird love triangle thing happening between Jake and Nate and Jules that felt so weird bc it had no significance to the plot at all and it felt like it was only thrown in there for the sake of having ~romantic drama~ idk maybe I wasnt paying too much attention and there was more to it than that but it really just seemed like they wanted to put romance in there and didnt want to bother to put any work into it
BUT the thing about romantic sub plots is that THERE ALREADY WAAAAS OOOOOOOOONE which brings me to the biggest frustration I have w this movie because--and DISCLAIMER, this was also my favourite plot point of the movie bc it was by far the most interesting, the biggest reason for me enjoying the movie at all, and the bit I feel like should have had WAY more attention--Newt and Hermann were like legitimately in love in this movie I swear to god I was watching it and thinking “this is GENUINELY the most blatantly gay thing I’ve ever seen in a feature film and I know that straight ppl are very talented at writing gay romances completely by accident so it’s possible that they just accidentally did it this way but also it is REALLY goddamn obvious oh my gooood?” (and then I did a lot of frantic googling and found out that I was right and Charlie Day & Burn Gorman knew what the fuck they were doing and I felt so validated lol), and yet despite this, the movie had them speak for the last time almost at the halfway point of the film and then spend the entire second half apart and not talking at all and even at the post-credits scene where Jake and Newt talked for a bit Hermann wasn't there?? not even behind Jake to give Newt any searching glances?? Nothing??
dude...Newt being possessed by the precursors is a HUGELY interesting concept that actually makes sense and I wish it had had more attention. I’ve seen a lot of ppl say that pru butchered Newt’s character and I don’t 100% agree bc like...being possessed will change you lmao so while yes I’m obviously sad that he wasn’t himself, I feel like it made sense that he had a slight personality change, because it...wasn’t him anymore. we don’t really see the Newt we all fell in love with in the first movie. we THINK we’re seeing him, but halfway through we find out we’re wrong.
my critiques with that plotline are basically that I wish the reveal had happened a little bit later on, and I wish that it had been a little more obvious I guess?? like, we definitely get hints of it (when Hermann excitedly asks Newt to help him with a dangerous unorthodox project and Newt says “dude why are you doing something so risky when we’ve already got a good plan in motion? just wait for that to be done, it’s fine” and Hermann IS us, he IS the audience when he reacts, because this is a completely insane thing for Newt to say. Newt, who, in the first movie, was so obsessed with finding knowledge that he went behind the marshall’s back to literally risk his life doing something incredibly dangerous just to see what would happen? being given the opportunity to do the same kind of dangerous frivolous act and refusing? this is blatantly out of character, and Hermann is all of us when he’s shocked, “what, you mean you...won’t help me??” which means it wasn’t bad writing on their part, it was purposefully supposed to stand out as something that was wrong and something that we needed to pay attention to. that was a really good scene to hint that something was Not Right with Newt), and I wish there had been a bunch more like it. I think the reveal should have been saved for the end of the second act; I think that should have been the moment that act 2 of a story usually has, that dreadful event that happens that leaves the main characters feeling completely hopeless and unsure what to do.
I also wish that he had managed to break through more than That One Scene, I think it would’ve been more dramatic if he’d had a few moments where he managed to take control for a second to remind us that he’s still in there and still fighting, and I’m sad they didn’t do that. I saw a fan comic that touched on this idea and I think it’s brilliant, even the idea of him suddenly getting a nosebleed and acting distracted to show that that’s the Real Him trying to fight through would have been sooooooooo good.
I also feel like it didn’t make any sense for Nate to be the one to subdue him in the end, I dont even think those two interact at all so like, why was it him?? it would have been so much more dramatic and heartbreaking if Hermann had been the one to confront him so they could’ve had a little conversation on the roof where Newt could once again break through for a second before getting taken over and then Hermann could like idk have a taser hidden behind him that he uses to subdue him and THAT wouldve been a way sadder and more interesting way to do it. I also think Hermann shouldve been the one to speak to him in the post credits scene, or to have him in the background behind Jake just watching him sadly so we can get a couple shots of intense eye contact like UGH I just wish there had been more interaction between the two of them after the reveal happened!! When the movie was over and I realized they never spoke again I felt so upset!!! they're soulmates!! they're literally in love!! this has been CONFIRMED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
and segueing in from the soulmate thing, another thing that made me sad was that nobody came in pairs anymore :( aside from Newt and Hermann, they were the only ones gjdfk but in the first one every character had another character that they were paired up with, both for drifting reasons and just for plot reasons (except Chau and Tendo but I’m pretty sure there's actually significance to that too), and in the second one it just sort of felt like everyone was drifting with each other with no strong connection needed and that made it feel way less special. granted, the movie takes place ten years after the first one so in that time maybe technology advanced to the point where you didn't need a strong neural connection to drift anymore, but for the sake of the story it would have been way better if they'd kept the whole soulmates concept from the first one, it made it way stronger and more special
so yeah in conclusion I did think pru was enjoyable and I probably would watch it again some time but also it definitely pales in comparison to the first one and I’m desperately hoping we get one more so they can tie everything together and FIX THINGS KFGH it’s not too late!!!!! I wish I could write Pacific Rim 3 I genuinely think I would do a good job I love storytelling and I’m very passionate about these characters!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
61 notes · View notes
hunbomb · 4 years
Text
roommate! jaemin
Tumblr media
i hope u guys like this one! i do :) 
warning: not proofread LMAO
jaemin: a huge flirt
like we been knew sis okay bUt its not like it defines him ya kno??? like yes he is a flirt but its not like he does it purposely
however that doesn’t stop every single girl from liking him
except for u cause you’re ~not like other girls~
jk you are 
cause who wouldn’t find na jaemin attractive?? tf???
okay but like the dealio between you and jaemin is that you are best friends 
and you have a fat crush on him (u have since the beginning of highschool LOL)
luckily for you, although jaemin is a flirt, he isnt interested in any girls so he doesnt bring any to your dorm
and even if he did, he would tell u because it would be shitty not to 
anyway
so u met in grade nine and yalls friendship popped TF off right away like you joined nomins duo and made it a trio in the span of 4 months and everyone was like???? this mf got that close to them that fast???? mastery
jeno was like ur brother from another mother fr
you and him told eachother everything and sometimes he would tell you things he wouldnt even tell jaemin. like everyone has those people that although theyre close w, there are some things you’d never tell and that goes for jeno and jaemin
jaemin never told jeno he listens to taylor swift
and jeno never told jaemin that he watched all of my little pony friendship is magic on netflix
but since you and jeno shared some personal things w eachother, you obviously told him about your crush on jaemin
and since you had a crush on jaemin, you never got like super super close with him just cause ur feels got in the way 
mainly just you never got as close to jaemin as you did jeno
sure you were bffs, but it wasn’t on such an intimate level
cause everytime jaemin would look your way you’d be gasping for air
so timeskip to senior year
everything is great
your friendship is still strong af and you guys are all planning for post secondary
jaemin and you get into the same uni right.... and jeno gets into the one the town over so your friendship wont take that much damage
but!!! jaemin wants to room with you!!! and ur like!! fucufejdsk!!!
cause like ofc you want to who wouldnt????? but you have such a massisve crush on him you dont want it to get in the way of not only yours but also jaemins university experience
you say yes tho and next thing you know youre unpacking all your stuff
the dorm is kind of small like there isnt a lot of space,,,,, theres two bedrooms but the beds literally take out the whole room HAHHAHA and then there is a chill space with the kitchen connected and u and jaemin have to share a washroom LOL
“jaemin what the FUCK did you eat??? beans??? i bet it was beans this shit smells so bad i-”
“it really do be ya own friends sometimes” -jaemin 2020 :((((((
anyway so like university life is good you and jaemin invite jeno over every weekend for a sleepover and vice versa its so cute GAH
but like,,,, here’s where the drama comes in
one day you are facetiming jeno and youre telling him about how you really like jaemin and blah blah ya know the usual
and youre not really looking at the screen cause youre doing your homework and focusing on that but jeno sees in the back that jaemin has fully entered the room
and you dont notice cause hes silent and your still talking but jeno is trying to get your attention UDHSJIA
and when he does you see in your part of the screen jaemin just,,,, standing there
cue you ending the call with jeno SO FAST and turning around like oH i thought you had classes right now?
“.... they ended early”
“i see” ://////////
you like get up super fast and just walk around him and go into your roomm shutting the door 
poor jaemin is just like “what”
cause to be honest he never really considered this situation ever happening yah he thought you were prettier than most girls and he liked the way you were able to talk to people so easily but he never would have thought you harboured feelings for him
so he kind of just leaves it be cause he knows that you def dont want to talk about it and is willing to wait for you to be the one who brings it up
so time skip to dinner youre both just eating in silence but you dont like it,,,
“what i said was true” you say and jaemin looks up and he knows where this convo is going but he lets you speak
“i didnt ever plan on telling you because i really like our friendship but i guess i wasn’t careful enough”
your heart is beating hella fast but you try to look unbothered and its going pretty good until jaemin asks you something
“how long have you felt this way?”
OKAY like it shouldnt be a big deal to tell him bc you already exposed yourself but for some reason that question just hit you deep cause you realized that youve liked him for so long and he never felt the same ya know
“i dont know,,, since the start of highschool? when we became friends i always thought you were cute and it just turned into a full blown crush”
jaemin just sort of nods in response “oh okay”
so that night your just laying in your bed full of regrets
you know things are about to be super duper awkward between you and jaemin and you wish it didnt have to be like that
so over the next couple of weeks its more awkward than it has ever been before and the sleepovers with jeno seem so divided 
its either jeno and you or jeno and jaemin its never the three of you anymore :((((((
jaemin isn’t ignoring your feelings though, dont worry! hes just trying to sort his out
because your confession kind of opened his eyes
he doesnt want to force himself to like you but he cant help but admit that when he first heard you talking about your feelings a huge warmth spread through his chest and he may or may not have uncovered some feelings
these feelings were always there but he suppressed in grade nine cause he thought you’d never like him and you just wanted to stay friends
so he pushed them down and never thought about it again
but obviously that didnt happen because now youre on his mind 24/7 and he wishes that he could just talk to you but hes kind of nervous
so after taking advice from jeno he tries to talk to you more, like asking how your day went and starting up conversations
youre  kind of like “what u playing at son” but you leave it cause you know jaemin would never do you dirty like that
it stays this way for a while until one night theres a particularly bad thunderstorm and jaemin is scared of thunder
and so when youre just playing on your phone jaemin opens your door slightly and has this scared look on his face
and you know that jaemin is scared of thunder so you open your arms without any words being shared
a huge boom of thunder makes jaemin squeal and jump into your arms
and he gets comfy under the covers as youre holding him, no words shared between you two
he starts to feel much better and this sense of comfort washes over him like,,, youre his home
and as hes falling asleep he softly mutters
“im sorry it took me so long”
and youre just straight confused like what does that mean is he talking about his feelings or just the fact that yall havent had such an close encounter in a while 
the next morning you wake up and jaemins arms and you guys are facing eachother
and hes already awake so when you oepn your eyes you find him already looking at you
“thank you for last night, youre the best” he whispers and youre like all good fam i understand
but then he leans in closer and is like “i should have told you this so long ago, but i am in love with you”
your eyes widen and youre like wh AT the FUCJ your heart is beating at like 420 bpm and ur shooketh
he just smiles and pulls in you in closer and its just a super soft moment and no words have to be said
that night you guys are cuddling on the couch after dinner when jaemin just asks you be his gf
OF COURSE YOU SAY YES! you have been waiting for this moment for god knows how long
jeno is all like damn fina-fucking-ly i’ve been watching this romance play out for like 5 years! 
its super cute
its even better that you guys are roommates because youre already living together so you get to see eachother everyday
jaemins room as become a guest room for sorts as he now shares a bed with you
jenos happy af hes like YESSS I DONT NEED TO SLEEP WITH JAEMIN IN OUR SLEEPOVERS ANYMORE
jaemin: >:(((((( tf is that supposed to mean
you just laugh and youre like im not complaining hahaha and jaemins heart just stutters so bad 
he really does love you and he cant believe it took him so long to accept his feelings
and one night he tells you about how he pushed them down and youre like “exCUSE ME we could have been dating all this time u pussy”
sad jaemin :((((( 
anyway ya its so good its a win-win situation 
you get to room with the love of your life and its just magical there are so many soft moments between you two and just UGH relationship goals
i need me a jaemin
194 notes · View notes
glassartpeasants · 4 years
Note
Hello so I found out requests were open and I got super excited. Anyway can I please request a chronostasis x reader where the reader is actually in love with overhaul and just pretends to love chrono and in the end he/she breaks up with him and goes to overhaul or they find out overhauls true colors and doesn’t want to be with him anymore so they just focus on chrono more
Damn, reader be going all over the place. Im so glad someone ask for chrono. I love him. He’s a beautiful being.
================================================
Title: Back and Forth
Chronostasis x Reader
Warnings: Angst, fluff, and implied sexual references (not alot of that thoug)
================================================
You were sitting on the edge of your bed as you looked at the carpeted floor beneath you. Breathing heavily as you can’t stop thinking about the man who took your breath away. Chisaki Kai.
“Im a horrible girlfriend.” You place your hands on your face and sigh into them. You weren’t even in a relationship with Chisaki but you couldn’t help looking at him every chance you got.
You felt so guilty, since you were in a relationship with his best friend! You were Chrono’s girlfriend and if he found out he would be heartbroken!
Right?
It was no secret that both of you had been drifting apart the last few months. Which is probably why you grew feelings for his boss in the first place. Chrono barely came by anymore, barely ever said i loved you and was always busy with work.
You did understand that he was willing to follow his best friend to the ends of the earth but..what about you? I mean, you remembered everything about him. His favorite color, his birthday, his favorite food, pretty much everything. But when your birthday rolled around your so called boyfriend was no where to be seen.
Even though that was awhile ago it still hurt you. You felt like you kept giving him second chances. It was starting to get annoying to say the least.
‘i shouldn’t feel guilty. I mean it seems like he does’t even care anymore’ You thought to yourself. You let out a sigh as you get up from your spot on the bed and walk over to the bathroom. You grabbed all your clothes that you needed and went to take a shower.
‘I’ll go see what Chisaki is up to maybe i can watch him for a bit. Who knows?’ You smile to yourself as you hurry up and turn the water on.
================================================
“You know Chrono, I’ve noticed that you and (y/n) have been slowly drifting apart. Haven’t you noticed?” Mimic said to the masked man looking up at him.
“Really? I think were doing fine.”
“I’m just saying to watch out. I’m just worried she’s gonna leave you man. I’ve seen Chisaki give her some looks, or it could just be me.” Mimic said finally before looking at Chrono.
“Wish you the best of luck man.” Mimic walked away right after that leaving the arrow headed male alone.
‘Mimic doesn’t know what he’s talking about. We still have a connection-’ Chrono was pulled out of his thoughts when he heard your giggling coming from Chisaki’s office. His mind went straight to what Mimic said and rushed over there and before he could slam the door open, he listened to your conversations.
“Haha yeah....hey Chisaki can i talk to you about something? It’s about Hari.”
‘What about me?’
“Fire away.”
“Im beginning to think he doesn’t love me anymore. I mean he’s never around me anymore, and anytime he has free time off he wants to be by himself. I know i shouldn’t think this but my mind can’t help to wonder off to the worse case scenario’s.” He noticed a shift in your usual happy tone.
“Well that such a shame, that you feel so alone that you can’t talk to Hari about this. How about you come back to my office tomorrow and we can talk over a game of Shogi?”
“Sure! At least i feel like i have someone to talk to! But still, i feel like breaking up with him. Like i said it doesn’t even seems like he’s trying in the relationship anymore.” So that’s how you truly feel? You feel so alone that you went to talk to his best friend instead of him. Maybe Mimic was right. Now that he’s been thinking about it he has noticed that he has been lacking in the attention department of you relationship. He lets out a soft sigh before heading to your room and falling backwards onto the bed.
Chrono looks up at the ceiling as he takes his mask off and sets it to the side. Looking up at the digital clock by your bed seeing it was close to midnight. Sighing he takes a shower.
“Oh Hari left his mask here. I should probably return it to him.” He jumped as he heard your voice from the other side of the door.
“I’m in the shower!” He yelled out to you, hoping to get some sort of response.
“Okay.” You replied with a bland answer.
================================================
The next day
“Hey Hari i need to talk to you, its....important...” You called out to your soon to be ex. You thought about it long and hard and come to the conclusion that maybe it was for the best that you two broke up. It was a miracle he even slept in the same room with you that night. Nothing intimate happened just went to bed pretty much.
“Yeah w-what is it?” Hari stuttered on his words. He was secretly hoping that you weren’t going to break up with him. Especially not for his boss. He wouldn’t know what to do if that was the case.
“I-I think we s-should break up.” Fuck. He was right you were breaking up with him. God damnit. He should’ve seen the signs that you were unhappy now your leaving him because of it.
“W-why?” He knew why but those words couldn’t help but fall from his mouth.
“Because your always at work, and when your not you barely ever come to hang out with me anymore! It’s like im invisible or not even needed in your life!” You cried out as tears formed on your face.
“....”
“Im gonna go....see you later Kurono.”
Chrono couldn’t do anything all he could do was stand there. Looking at your silhouette as you disappeared out of the base.
“You’ll see Kai for what he truly is soon enough...”
================================================
2 weeks after the breakup
“Hey Chisaki! Fancy seeing you here!” You said as you smiled up at him.
“Ah (y/n) its always a pleasure.”
“What are you doing?”
“Oh....just walking around.” You noticed how his tone changed for a second.
“Dear (y/n) would you like to hang out sometime to play shogi?” Damn my man really likes Shogi.
“Sure! It’s just gonna be awkward seeing Chrono after two weeks...”
“Ah yes i’ve heard that you broke up. Very sorry to hear that....”
================================================
2 months after break up
You had begun to hang out with Chisaki more but you couldn’t shake the uneasy feeling you slowly had developed spending so much time with him. It was the kind of feeling that made you want to shrink in a hole. 
You always caught him slipping on his good guy act, slowly but surely letting out his inner demons. Something that you didn’t want apart of. So you slowly distanced yourself from him and caught yourself losing feelings quickly. 
You saw how he treated Chrono and his other loyal employee’s and to be honest it pissed you off. They were working their ass off to please you, and you still treat them like their nothing?
‘Maybe breaking it off with Chrono was a bad idea..’ You thought to yourself as your mind wondered off to Hari again. You let out a sigh before looking around the base. Chisaki said that you could come and go as you pleased, but take a shower right away as soon as you got in.
Damn his Mysophobia
You looked around as you sat in what they called the ‘living room’. You saw Hari talking to Chisaki and you couldn’t help but notice that Hari looked more...buff? No...he was always strong but he looked like he hit the gym more often. Due to this new revelation you couldn’t help your wandering eyes as you were glued to Hari’s form. In other words checking him out. You had unintentional licked your lips as you continued to bask in Hari’s appearance.
Util his head snapped at you.
You squeak and turn your head quickly to the side as your entire face turned red, embarresssed at the fact you had been caught checking your ex out. Your eyes which you have snapped shut took a peak and saw that he wasn’t where he use to be standing. 
“Ugh i can’t believe i got caught checking him out...ugggghhhhh. He had to be going to the gym! Why couldn’t i stop staring at him. God damn you Hari for being so gorgeous.” You let out a groan in frustration as you placed your hands on your face.
Little did you know that a certain someone was hiding behind the wall snickering as he heard you.
================================================
1 month later
You slowly distanced yourself from Chisaki as the feelings you had for him long gone after you saw the way he treated Hari. You would never admit it but the thought of being in his arms once more soothed you but you knew that he would never take you back after trying to get with his best friend.
You walked the compound halls as you made your way to your once shared room with Hari. You had forgotten something awhile ago and went to pick it up. You mentally prayed he wouldn’t be there but of course to your luck as soon as you opened the door a shirtless Hari was standing in front of you.
You yelped as you tried to shut the door before you were caught in two strong arms trapping you.
“H-Hari?! What are you doing?!” You squeaked out as you felt his grip around your waist tighten. You felt his hot breath on your neck as tiny kisses were placed on your neck effectively making you whimper. Hari only snickered as he nibbled your earlobe before huskily whispering in you ear,
“Taking back what’s mine.” Was the last hing he said before he dragged you to the bed.
73 notes · View notes
cooliogirl101 · 4 years
Note
I was rereading your hisana AUs (which I love so much thank you) and was wondering: in the Nobody AU what would Hisana and Gin’s interactions be if they ever meet at all? Since hisana met gin at the seiretei and that’s not the case here would she meet him instead while he was out on a mission in the rukongai? Im curious to hear your thoughts. And thank you I love your writing!
Funnily enough, I feel like out of everyone she knows, her relationship with Gin would change the least. With everyone else, she refuses to get close to them because they either a.) have a preexisting relationship with canon!Hisana and she refuses to mess that up or b.) she doesn’t want to risk their safety by getting them involved in her personal vendetta against Aizen, or c.) both. With Gin, well...he has zero relationship with canon!Hisana (he like, is vaguely aware of her existence but that’s it) and he already has his own personal vendetta against Aizen. 
On Gin’s part, I feel like he would be the first person to figure out the puzzle that is Nobody. Not her identity, but the fact that she originally wasn’t from his world. 
“You know, I gotta thank ya. It’s been a while since I’ve been this interested in something.” Gin said, tilting his head to the side. “You really are a fascinating little puzzle, aren’t ya?” 
“Are you going to get to the point sometime this decade?” The cloaked figure in front of him asked irritably. “Because if not, I’d like to go get changed. I hate the feeling of blood on my clothes, ugh.” 
“I agree. The way it gets all sticky and tacky as it dries? Gross,” Gin said, giving an exaggerated shudder. “And honestly, it makes doing laundry such a pain. At least most of the uniform is black, but--”
“Some of it’s white and while fresh blood adds a splash of color, rusty brown isn’t an appealing shade on anyone,” Nobody finished, giving Gin the strong impression of rolling her eyes despite 90% of her face being covered. “My deepest apologies for disrupting your aesthetic sense by bleeding on you, shinigami-san-- next time, I’ll do my best to aim my blood away from your pristine robes.” 
Gin simply smiled. 
“And there it is again,” he murmured. “Tell me, Nobody-san. How is it that you know me so well when I don’t recall ever meeting you before today?”
“What are you talking about?” Nobody asked, folding her arms across her chest. 
“What you just said right now. About how ‘fresh blood adds a splash of color,’ and how ‘rusty brown isn’t an appealing shade on anyone.’ They’re not the exact words I’d have used, but they’re pretty damn close. Interesting that a mere two hours into our acquaintance, you would already know me well enough to predict my next words, wouldn’t ya say?” 
“Perhaps you’re simply predictable,” Nobody replied coolly. Gin’s smile widened. 
“I’ve been accused of many things, my dear, but predictable isn’t one of them,” he said softly. “You know, I couldn’t figure it out for the longest time. Couldn’t figure you out for the longest time.”
“Well, that’s on you,” Nobody muttered. “I’m not that complicated.”
He ignored her. 
“How was it that a stranger, someone no one had ever heard of, a complete nobody-- pardon the pun-- could know so much about the inner workings of the Gotei 13? How to get in and out unnoticed, how to wander the Seireitei without getting lost, exactly what to offer Kuchiki Byakuya to get him to agree to all of their demands...” Gin’s voice trailed off. “Too many things didn’t add up. Too many things didn’t make sense.” 
“I could be a rogue shinigami,” Nobody said evenly, voice giving nothing away. 
“The prevailing theory in the Seireitei right now,” Gin agreed. “But then you started going after Aizen Sousuke.” His smile turned sharp. “Not directly, of course. I don’t believe you’re that stupid. But you started going after his spies, his labs, even the most hidden ones. You started tracking down powerful hollows, warning them about him, about his shikai-- his most guarded secret, something you should’ve had absolutely no way of knowing.”
“You think just because you’re Aizen’s second in command, he trusts you with everything?” Her voice was mocking. “Have you considered that-- maybe, just maybe-- he knew about me and didn’t tell you? It would be awfully humiliating on his part to admit that an experiment of his had gone rogue, managed to escape, and was currently messing up his plans, after all.” 
“I’ll admit, that’s what I thought had happened. But then I met you.” He shook his head. “And I realized you knew me, even though I didn’t know you. More than that, you knew how I talked, you were familiar with my fighting techniques in a way only someone who’s fought me before would be, and--” 
He paused, smile slipping for the first time during their conversation. 
“And you know enough about me to know that I’m not loyal to Aizen. And someone who knows that, knows me very well indeed,” Gin finished quietly. “So let me ask you again: why don’t I know you?”
Nobody didn’t say anything for a long moment. Then--
“You’ve never been good at remembering those who didn’t interest you, Gin,” she said, a strange note in her voice. It almost sounded as if she was smiling beneath her mask. “In fact, I’m willing to bet a hundred dango that you can’t name five officers in your own division. By their actual names, not whatever weird nicknames you’ve come up with them in your head,” she added when he opened his mouth. 
Gin looked at her for a moment. 
“I can’t imagine I would’ve forgotten you,” he said honestly. 
“Well, what other explanation is there?” She asked, tilting her head to the side. 
“Just one,” Gin said, opening his eyes fully. “What did he mean to you, the other me?” 
“I--” For the first time, Nobody seemed truly caught off guard. “What?” 
“The other me. The future me, or perhaps the me from another dimension. What did he mean to you?” Gin asked, leaning in. 
Nobody turned away, ducking her head. It was all the confirmation he needed. 
“What does it matter? He’s gone,” she snapped after a second’s pause. “They’re all gone. There’s nobody left.” 
“Nobody left,” Gin repeated. Ah. So that was how she’d come up with the name. 
She looked up at him for a moment. 
“You were the last one to go,” she said distantly. “You asked what you-- the other you-- meant to me. You weren’t...we weren’t anything, really. Not friends and not even enemies, towards the end. You were just someone who was there, constantly, this incessant, unending presence I could never get rid of, that showed up everywhere, up until...up until you weren’t, anymore.” She laughed hollowly. “But now you’re back and you’re exactly the same, and--”
Someone who was always there. 
Someone who stayed. 
Gin wasn’t sure how he felt about that. 
“Exactly the same? I doubt that. I like ta think that I’m unique in every universe,” he said instead. 
“Well.” She considered his words for a moment. “You’re right, you aren’t exactly the same. There are some slight differences I’ve noticed.” 
“Oh?” Gin asked curiously. 
“Yeah. The other you was better looking.” 
104 notes · View notes
kuronanox · 4 years
Text
Not enough - Byakuya Kuchiki
Tumblr media
It amazed her that thee Kuchiki Byakuya was actually interested in her, it was so surreal. Everything came naturally, their conversations and body language was like they were in tune together. Everyone could see that he was finally finding some type of peace after hisana's passing. Everyone but the royal and noble housing even after hisana's passing they blame it on her being a commoner and now the horrible treatment was getting thrown at (Your Name) now.
No one has ever verbally abused her infront of Byakuya but when he was gone they talked down and degraded her. She would just ignore them and go on about her day. The first few months  were fine because no one knew they were dating but once the relationship started getting serious and she moved into the Kuchiki manor the negative comments came left and right into her head. Of course she didn't tell Byakuya and most of the time she stayed closed to him so she wouldn't have to hear the abusing comments.
It was another fall morning as they strolled around the manor getting fresh air. "What is your favorite season (Your Name)." Byakuya ask calmly as they walked side by side admiring the green plants and flowers turning a beautiful autumn red. "Hmm the time between fall and winter, it's never to cold or hot!" She smiles and grabs his arm gently as she hugs it as they continue striding around the manor. Of course as nobles showing affection wasn't allowed but she didn't care and as long as she was happy Byakuya didn't mind the gesture either. "I see." He replies as it turns to a comfortable silence between them.
"Have you talked to rukia recently?" She brings up looking at him now with worried eyes. "Of course, she's doing fine with the human substitute shinigami in the world of living right now." He answers reassuring her their relationship as gotten better by time.
"Hmm someone has gotten soft." She jokes and squeezes him tightly as he eyes widen a little bit and he softly smiles without her knowing of course, but the hug gets cut short as she sees a few elders walking towards them as she quickly pulls away from the affection and awkwardly bow and stays behind Byakuya. The elders speak to him about important matters about the Kuchiki house and he exchanges a few words. Byakuya looks at (Your Name) and he recently began to notice that her reitsu would fluctuate everytime she was around a royal or noble that didn't allow their relationship. Cutting the conversation short he gently grabs her hands with his and walks past the elders.
She looks at their hands and blushes softly. This was the first time he had ever showed affection towards her infront of anyone. "I'm sorry you don't have to do that... you know. I know the nobles don't like it." She starts loosening her grip now as his tighten. "When has that ever stopped you?" He asks now curious.
Byakuya knew she was always a loud mouth and her manners were certainly not presentable to other nobles. She liked to show her curves, didn't like wearing fancy clothes, did her own chores and curses a whole bunch, but for some reason that made him like her even more when they first met each other. Byakuya liked her because she possessed all the qualities he didn't have or wasn't allowed to do because it was unacceptable for the head of the clan to have.
"I know it's just, I don't want people to talk... you know." She sadly says and walks ahead a few steps before he silently follows her. "Oh I'm going out with Matsumoto tonight, girls night!" She smiles now changing the mood between them now.
"YEAH AND THEN THE OLD BITCH HAD THE NERVE TO TELL ME THAT I WAS FAT AND MY FACE WAS TO BIG! AND IM LIKE AT LEAST IM NOT WALKING CLOSER TO MY GRAVE EACH DAY!" (Your Name) screams to Matsumoto, Nanao and Hinamori.
"She didn't!" Hinamori exclaims covering her mouth like a gossip girl.
"She did honey!"
"Ugh nobles, thats why you gotta go for the ugly guys and then you make them hot." Matsumoto shakes her head and pours another shots for them. Nanao facepalms and says "Everytime we meet up they always have something negative to say, why not just tell Kuchiki taicho?"
"Fuck that, I'm so tired of having to filter myself at the manor too! LIKE I WANT TO SCREAM FUCK, SHIT, BITCH BUT I CANT!"
Hinamori just laughs as Matsumoto takes the shot and nods furiously!
"Jesus." Nanao says just giving up.
"But you do anything for the one you love." (Your Name) softly says taking shot number 7. "Same." Matsumoto sulks as they both start crying together.
"So I'm guessing we are walking them home again." Nanao says as Hinamori just happily pour more shots for the two girls sulking across from her.
(Your name) safely gets back to the manor with the help of Hinamori, she was drunk but she was still able to recognize and act like she was normal. "Will Kuchiki taicho be upset that you drank a lot?"
"Nah, he's probably asleep anyways, thank you I'll take my leave now!" She smiles and gets into the manor.
Although it was hard to act sober she took her time to walk into their bedroom. There were still some maids and servants doing some choirs so she avoided them at all cost so she didn't look like a fool to them and ruin Byakuya image. Turning the corner to their room one of the oldest head maid was taking out the tea pot from the place.
"Drunk again I see." She sternly says with hatred in her eyes as (Your Name) just ignores the comment and proceeds to go into the room. The old lady prohibits her from entering. "You won't go in."
"Move or I'll move you myself." (Your Name) threaten to the lady as she doesn't bulge.
"You are only here because Byakuya Sama allows you to stay, but to everyone else in this house you bring disgrace and tarnish our name. You are a vulgar lady with no manners and inconsiderate, rude and foul mouth."
Byakuya stirs in his sleep waking up from talking coming out from infront of his room.
"And? I'm a hundred percent sure he knows how I am already, why do you care how I am. Yes I'm a commoner-" (Your Name) proceeds to argue but the older maids interrupts with a statement that broke her self confidence.
"At least Hisana Sama didn't go around and tarnish the name, she was lady like and knew how to contain herself unlike you."
(Your Name) hesitantly eyes widen she was sadden, no one had ever talked about Hisana. Behind closed door she was always being compared, she knew but no one was going to compare (Your Name) to another person let alone a past lover.
"You know, I get we are two different person but I'm sure she wouldn't have approve of you talking down about commoners because we know the struggle of having to act perfect all the time and keeping a imagine so we don't look bad for the family name. You wouldn't know old lady because you've never been discriminated. I know damn well everyday we tried our best for Byakuya and I'm glad she is in a better place and not down here where she would have still gotten the same treatment as me."
Byakuya had enough of the arguing as he swiftly gets out of the futon and towards the door before he stops when he hears (Your Name) continuing to defend him.
"If you ever wonder why Byakuya always act so cold is probably because he has to act perfect for the family and he carries the burden of our imagine and you guys give him shit for every little thing he does but he sucks it up because he was taught to. You guys don't see the sleepless nights he gets and the fights he put up to protect his people he loves. I won't stand here letting you talk down about me and his relationship when he has been the happiest since the death of his late wife. I won't let you take away his happiness. You guys think you know him but y'all don't know a thing. Weather you like it or not I'm leaving." (Your Name) passionately says to the old women as she angrily spoke up.
"You jus-"
Byakuya roughly opens the door to see a flushed (Your Name) and the head maid standing face to face. The maid not allowing her to enter the room. "That's enough, leave now." He harshly tells the head maid as she bows and apologize as she gives a sour look towards the girl before leaving.
There was an awkward silence in the air as she looks down and speaks. "I'm sorry, I know I shouldn't be talking to the elders like that. I just got frustrated. I'll sleep at Matsumoto place tonight." She offered proceeding to walk away.
Byakuya grabs her hands and place them with his as he kisses her forehead and pulls her into a hug. "Why haven't you told me anything?" He asks as she calmly hugs him back and tears fall down. "You know I would have said something if you would have just communicate to me."
(Your Name) doesn't say anything as he rubs her back and leads her into bed with him. "I fell in love with you because of how you are, you don't have to act anymore." He proceeds to says as she gently nods.
Byakuya softly smiles and kisses her forehead again. "We deal with this together my love."
131 notes · View notes
Text
more malec livewatch, everyone! i decided to start making the posts separately instead of keeping reblogging the same one over and over because i don’t want to drive everyone crazy with that gigantic fucking post. you can read the first ones here and i’ll keep updating the posts to lead to the next ones i guess. also im tagging it malec livewatch for those who want to avoid this nonsense
so let’s brave pre-wedding episode 12 i guess
oh boy.... we’re gonna do it... we’re gonna experience the Maximum Cringe
the special effects are so BAD odaijsdoaj when he summons the wine into Alec’s hand it’s just...... god
“we never finished our conversation” i mean you were the one who finished it magnus so wtf are you going on about
“it’s about family, tradition, honor” yeah we get it zuko boi duoahsiudhdiusa
really tho like he’s so clearly just.... reciting it. taking some shit out off the top of his head about how it’s the right thing and it’s sad tbh
he clearly kinda already has a script too? like “you and I understand marriage very differently” he says it right off the bat, he’s been thinking it over and hghgghgh
magnus goes near alec and alec swallows immediately and magnus ain’t even making a move to touch him yet. just diuahsdah it’s so obvious how hard he’s trying to hold back here
“you’re confusing me” is like the only thing he says the whole scene that sounds genuine
he’s paying so much attention to magnus’ dumb little speech about what love feels like too like. he’s trying to hold back but he’s very clearly pulled in, and i don’t even think it’s by magnus specifically (i mean obviously cuz have you seen him) but because he... kind of wants to hear it, kind of wants magnus to give him some golden argument that will make his whole resolution shatter. except he doesn’t because he doesn’t know what he’ll do then, but he’s still hoping for something and it’s sad
like how magnus clearly pauses like he’s waiting for alec’s reaction too, like. alec makes to leave and magnus doesn’t go after him, but he speaks, and alec stops. only when alec stops he gets closer. only when alec looks at him, clearly waiting to hear more, does he begin to talk again. i dig that even if most of this scene is kinda ugh to me
i hate how he uses his magic tho like what’s the point?? like yes i know that magic “can’t create feelings” but still dauhdsa it kinds feels like he’s cheating or trying to manipulate alec or something and i’m.. not into how the whole thing is done
oof hate how alec says “this is all just a game to you, isn’t it?” like bitch you know damn well it’s not like he’s putting himself at risk and showing you so much vulnerability and i hate how he goes for the whole “oh magnus doesn’t care about anything he’s just a seductive lothario” narrative in here lowkey. like i know he’s just trying to distance himself and he doesn’t fully believe it but... aaaaa i hate it
and he’s so HURT by alec’s words too like the rejection doesn’t hurt him as much as hearing alec say that he just flirts and it means nothing to him does. he’s trying so fucking hard to be open and honest and taking such a RISK (psychological, emotional, even physical) and alec is just throwing all of that bullshit persona he’s actively trying not to hide behind in his face, belittling all his efforts and feelings, and aaa
like again i don’t really blame alec but he truly is so hurt
still wonder what alec was about to say when he turned around to talk to him and magnus wasn’t there anymore tbh like. probably something else to try and distance himself so it’s probably good magnus left and isn’t there to hear it and it kind of forces alec to really think it over to himself instead of trying to argue but...... i do wonder what he was going to say diahsiduahdisah
magnus doesn’t even answer the whole “this means nothing to you” veiled accusation which.... also hurts like idk if he’s trying to avoid a fight or derailing like alec clearly is trying to, or if he just is too tired to have this argument, or if he just doesn’t want to open up this much, but either way he doesn’t acknowledge it except for his hurt look and oof
no one cares about jace and clary talking or whatever’s happening here next
i had never noticed the way magnus winks at clary when he says “oh, it’s happy hour somewhere, my dear” daishdaiuh it’s kinda cute tbh
hodge is so uncomfortable like the way he talks to magnus and gets too close to him... in a way that he doesn’t with anyone else either like he’s clearly just lowkey despising him/getting into his space and magnus notices too and it gives me the heebie jeebies
diuhaiudsahduaishdai magnus’ IMMEDIATE reaction of “why is ragnor fell there, he’s not more powerful than me” asohdaiudha we stan bickering bffs i truly love them so much
“he’s older than you” “certainly not wiser” daiohsahda
i think he might also be lowkey trying to protect ragnor and take the clave’s attention away from him now that i think about it but still i love their bickering
nah that’s cancelled he immediately rats him out on having been jocelyn’s profesor lmaoo
“that’s why he hasn’t been responding to my fire messages” daoihdsaiohads someone needs to lick their wounds
he’s just like “oh ragnor is hiding in his specific safehouse outside of london” like daoiusduaihdasuda love how he just knows that off the top of his head when ragnor clearly didn’t actually tell him about it since he just fucked off and hasn’t been responding
“didn’t know you were here” “that was the point” doaiuhdasiouhdaiuhdas
like i know he’s talking about the marriage but also.... just mood in general tbh
again with the eye flickering. hes looking at magnus, no hes not, yeah he is, haha SIKE, oh there it is again, nope it’s gone..... kinda funny cuz like i know that alec’s eyes flicker a lot in general but afterwards when they are together every time he looks at magnus it’s just so pointed and intense and focused on him so the contrast of watching the s1 scenes and realizing how little his glances at magnus always lasted is... interesting and heartbreaking. like obviously he doesn’t want to be looking at any man for too long, doesn’t want to take that risk, keeps hyper aware of his attraction at all times, but he still can’t help the glances and then when he can look he just does it so unapologetically and intensely and you can tell that it’s just. intimate to him (to both of them really) right then, and wow
i know we talk a lot about alec’s Big Hands but magnus’ hands are so nice too in like a totally different way... anytime he holds anything it just looks like he’s treating it like it’s precious, it’s so delicate and careful and his hands are smooth and pretty and wow i love him so fucking much
wow can’t believe nothing heartbreaking at all happens when they go to ragnor’s house and that ragnor just winks at magnus like “haha yes i am ‘dead’” and magnus is like “yes, this is a lie and a ruse and also a plan. i am perfectly aware that ragnor is not dead at all”
ragnor says “my dear friend, i will always be here for you” with so much honesty and love and ugh i love them like they’re always little bitches to each other but they still have the room to be perfectly loving and honest with each other and i stan
ragnor looks at magnus with so much fucking hurt when magnus says “i prayed she would love me the same” like you can tell it destroys him to even remember it or think about it and aaa
“he was always so much better looking than you” and the way magnus purses his lips in what is clearly a smile like he just knows it’s the teasing and he loves ragnor and their dynamic and i just daouhdsauida also he’s so beautiful boy i die
the way ragnor says “someday, someone will come and will tear down those walls you put around you and around your heart” and magnus looks at him with so much. fucking PAIN in his eyes because someone did but it got nowhere and in the end alec just kind of acknowledged his walls again and went back to pretending that it never happened and that magnus didn’t progress or open up to it at all, that magnus was just lying, that it’s just a game and dauhdaiudha god he’s so HURT
again i owe harry shum jr my entire life like he might be seriously the best actor i’ve ever seen in any show, he’s so damn expressive and talented in every little motion he’s truly a pearl in the desert of shit that is this show
“even in death, you give the best advice” ugh love how this really cements that magnus is used to opening up to ragnor and even with their bickering there’s so much room for them to be emotionally honest like we stan
anyway sure wish this had any emotional continuity whatsoever but at least the cringefest is over. onto an actual good scene fucking finally
love every little detail about this scene as yall probably already know so i’ll try not to point every single one of them out yet again but who knows if i’ll succeed. i bet that i won’t tbh
love the contrast between alec looking so tense when lydia comes down the aisle and she’s like all smiles and shit
she’s before him and he can barely look at her like his eyes flicker a bit between her and the bouquet and he settles on the bouquet this whole thing is so... wrong so clearly, like i could show it to someone who doesn’t know shit about sh and they would be able to tell that nothing fits
even alec’s clothes are weird, like idk i don’t understand fashion but his look looks so disjointed, like the blazer doesn’t really match the pants, the bowtie looks weird and doesn’t match the buttons, and shit and nothing about him looks like it’s in the right place. and everyone else (except maybe izzy who also looks miserable lmao) looks like a perfect picture and he’s just.... idk there’s this aura of wrongness around him that’s subtle but really well done in the terms of costume and shit. the costume department really went off in this whole scene honestly like we stan. possibly the only ones other than the actors who knew what the fuck they were doing lmao
when lydia smiles at izzy and izzy barely moves up the corner of one of her lips dajdasnjdan she looks even more miserable than alec does and god i love the lightwood siblings so much like i truly do. she’s supporting him because she’s decided she’s not going to keep pushing him when it only leads to him not trusting her but she’s all broken that he’s broken, and she was willing to take his place and throw her life away even when that’s everything she’s always tried to avoid, just so he wouldn’t have to do this, and aaaaa
who cares about jace and clary looking at each other @directing team like seriously get over this
he turns in the direction of the silent brother in an almost kind of jerking motion like he completely forgot about where he was supposed to go or something, like again he’s just... not in it
they are holding hands in the WEIRDEST possible way too like there’s so much distance between them it’s almost funny ldaojsja
he tries to smile at lydia when she’s about to put the rune on his arm like he knows she knows that he’s hating this and he’s just bearing it and trying to not make her uncomfortable? like doajdsaoj
the way that magnus INTERRUPTS not just the wedding but also the chorus, you could tell there was a crescendo coming even if you’ve never heard the song, but magnus pushes the doors open and suddenly it stops and there’s this little bit and then the “tututututu” of tension as he comes into view and his steps perfectly match the three little beats that were already there before, but sound so much louder and more prominent like a heartbeat, like before they were muffled and now they’re real??? the poetic cinema bro
ill just never get over the way they used song here it sounds like an AMV like the song isn’t just giving the vibe, they are telling the story THROUGH the song and the whole scene is basically a coreography, and the song is the narrative, and holy shit i love it so much could you imagine if they had used this amount of thought and genius and clever storytelling the whole show?? i’d shit myself
ugh the DRAMA of magnus’ look again i KNOW i’ve been over this again and again and again and again and again and again but i just. i love how they used his makeup & costume to accentuate magnus’ 1- face, 2- eyes, 3- jaw, and 4- adam’s apple. the whole focus is on his face and eyes (which again so expressive we stan harry shum jr in this house), the fact that his eyes are his WARLOCK MARK (yeah they’re not out but like we’re still drawing attention to the part of magnus he tries to hide the most, and the part of him that marks what makes him disdainful to shadowhunters), the fact that his jaw and adam’s apple are so prominent. his whole face looks really sharp and masculine you know?? like the whole focus is on everything about him that’s supposed to be “wrong” and make malec “wrong” but he’s never looked more beautiful (IT’S SUCH AN UNDERRATED LOOK) and they didn’t sacrifice his gnc-ness for it either, on the contrary, they gave his hair the hot pink streak which. INSPIRED WE STAN, and the makeup is very clear (again esp around his eyes) which of course only adds to it because he’s not just a man, he’s a gnc man and that makes it “worse”, but also like, i like how they accentuated his masculinity in alec’s coming out scene, without sacrificing his identity and gender non conformness. again the costume department is the only one who genuinely knew what they were doing 100% of the time i hope they all got big fucking checks
alec just blinks and focuses on him and it’s the first time it looks like he’s really looking at something and i just wow
izzy is so happy to see magnus there :) she loves her brother so much :)
magnus holding up two fingers to get people to shut up... the way he snarls “maryse, this is between me and your son” with so much certainty and like no room for bullshit he’s so good at making shadowhunters too speechless to stop him and honestly im such a whore tbh if he did this to me id just nut on the spot. shut me up daddy. fuck who said that
like how they included the “i’ll leave if he asks me to” and how he really doesn’t say anything, he’s just standing there, like they made sure to make this scene respectful and i was kind of dreading it the first time because i’d HATE it if magnus had outed him or made this whole drama out of it but he didn’t and i like that so so much
“i thought we were doing the right thing, but... this isn’t it” always gets me and i can’t even put my finger on why. it just does like again this is not really about magnus or their relationship, it’s about how he feels about the whole thing, everything that he’s giving up and he barely knows what for anymore, and i justjfianfajf
again the BRILLIANCE of the song usage the way that he’s talking to lydia and the beat is so damn loud and overwhelming and then as soon as he turns to magnus everything just drowns out and there is one (1) piano note and it’s just him and magnus and it’s like everything silences??? he’s just so damn focused and it’s not the nervousness and loudness of everyone else and their whole audience (they don’t even show the audience anymore after alec turns to him for real and before the actual kiss i don’t think) and there’s just that sharp focus and certainty because alec’s made up his mind and there’s no sound anymore like mwaaahhh poetic cinEMA
and it’s just that moment of clarity as they both look at each other and the song begins again with the higher tempo again, but it feels more like, a march? than that overwhelming noise. and of course there’s the singing and it feels like everything has purpose and is just laser focused and it’s still intense but in a completely opposite way, not lost but found and wow im such a whORE for this scene it’s unbelievable
like how alec takes the first step towards magnus after he’s down the stairs exactly as the song goes “want” like mwaahhhhh brilliance amazing talented showstopping spectacular never been done before completely unique,
his “enough” is dajksdfahidasdhadusahuash again im a simple sub id nut
i was right they only really show the audience again after the kiss. except for maryse but even then it’s so quick, we see her going to alec and after alec says “enough” she literally doesn’t show anymore it’s like she’s not even there, she just disappears it’s so sexy we stan??? like again alec’s made up his mind and nothing else is there to stop him wow love that for him could you imagine thinking this man is shy and insecure? can’t relate
THEY ARE SKIGGNISNGG
FOREVER A WHORE FOR THE WAY MAGNUS CHASES AFTER HIM HOLY FUCKING SHIT. THE WAY HE’S SO LOST IN THE KISS, IN THE ELATION, AND HE JUST CAN’T HELP GOING FOR MORE BEFORE HE CAN STOP HIMSELF AND KEEP UP WITH HIS TIGHT COMPOSTURE (because magnus had barely moved once alec had seen him, he just stood there and waited like he was waiting for his cue, he was holding himself perfectly steadily and just had so many walls) LIKE HE JUST CAN’T HELP BUT WANT?? AND GO FOR MORE?? AND THEN HE REALIZES ALEC IS PULLING AWAY AND HE LOOKS AT HIM FOR A SECOND (and his eyes look so DIFFERENT, not like there’s a wall there, he looks relieved and happy and even kind of dazed and i just wow the difference is SO clear) AND ALEC LOOKS AT HIM AND HE TAKES JUST A FRACTION OF A SECOND BEFORE HE LEANS IN AGAIN, AND IT’S THE FIRST TIME THAT MAGNUS HAS ASKED FOR MORE AND ALEC’S GIVEN IT, BECAUSE ALEC HAS BEEN GIVING HIM SOME OPENINGS BUT EVERY TIME MAGNUS WANTED MORE HE TURNED AWAY, BUT THIS TIME HE FUCKING GIVES MAGNUS WHAT HE’S SILENTLY ASKING FOR, HE’S CHOOSING HIM FULLY AND NOT JUST ENOUGH FOR THEM TO BE ABLE TO BE TOGETHER, HE’S CHOOSING TO GO ALL IN AND KISS MAGNUS UNTIL HE’S SATISFIED AND HOLY SHIT THE POETIC CINEMA!! THE TALENT!!! THE BRILLIANCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THANK YOU SHADOWHUNTERS CREW FOR PUTTING UP YOUR FIVE TOTAL BRAINCELLS TOGETHER TO MAKE THIS FANTASTIC THING HAPPEN HOLY FUCKING SHIT THIS SCENE IS EVERYTHING TO ME 
a bitch needs to lie down i think that’s all for today
next part
22 notes · View notes