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#ugh talking about them again makes me sad
comfy-writer · 2 days
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Talk to Me Please! Soulmate AU
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Warning: Sad! Angst! Harm to the reader! xreader! xEijiro Kirishima! Scars on the reader!
Info: Y/N means your name, and h/c means your hair color. L/N means your last name and e/c means your eye color as well!
A/N This is my third post so far! Thanks for the likes on the Pirate Bakugou story! I love fantasy so I shall be writing more mha fantasy! This is something I threw together in about an hour, so if it's bad I am sorry about that. Here is a sad story for Kirishimaxsoulmate reader!
Feeling the pain of your soulmate sucks. You feel their physical pain, so when your soulmate was hurt you became hurt as well. Feeling all these wounds and scars does take a toll on one’s body. Each time you feel pain, your soulmate does as well. Eijiro Kirishima was always worried about his soulmate. Ever since he was 10 he was terrified and wanted to help her. Distress her pain somehow. But he never knew her so each night he cried crying out for her.
~~~10 years old~~~
Eijiro smiles while he talks to his friend. His crimson red eyes look at his friend. He quickly feels a stabbing pain on his side making his eyes go wide in surprise. A yelp escaping Eijiro. “I-I have to go give me a second!” Kirishima smiles weakly running off to the bathroom and abandoning his birthday party.
The black haired boy shuts the door to a stall and lifts up his shirt, a gnarly cut strides across his side covering his rib-cage. His black hair slowly falls as he looks down examining the cut. ‘What!” He screams before he calms his body down.
Eijiro takes a deep breath and closes his eyes, his head is now leaned against the cold stall door. Eijiro’s red eyes pile with warm tears and he looks down at the scar. “My soulmate. Is she okay?!” He asks himself clenching his teeth in pain. He feels terrible, jolting sensation run through his body.
Eijiro takes a deep breath slicing the air with his breaths, each time his chest goes up and down. His hand runs on his skin, that was sliced a moment ago before being healed and he sputters out another breath in the air. “The wound is healed? Maybe my soulmate turned ten before me.” He breathlessly replaces to himself in the air of the bathroom stall silence.
Eijiro glances at the cut striding across his skin and tears prick his red crimson eyes again. He stands there crying. His first double digits birthday and he is worried about his soulmate. Scared to death for her wellbeing.
~~~~~16 years old~~~~~
Eijiro looks at the many cuts on his arm. He is scared for his soulmate again. Open soars across his body as he tries to cover it up. Changing his hero costume to have a shirt, so he wasn’t worried about what the others thought. Eijiro’s body patterns with them and he always cries, bringing a smile to his warm friendly face when his eyes hide something different, something deeper inside. Pushing the feelings away and in his chest. Like a vault that couldn’t escape.
“Ugh, again?” He talks to himself pulling a shirt up and over his head. Eijiro gels up his hair before running out his door of the UA dorm room. Eijiro feels a terrible nagging feeling in the back of his head. He tries to cope with it as the slight breeze of the make belive wind wooshing against UA fills his mind.
He continues to run down the hall as he sees his friend Bakugou, talking to a girl. She has beautiful h/c hair that has locks on it. Her e/c orbs looking at the blond’s red ones. Her beautiful s/c skin glimmering in the slight sun that peaks over in the shadows of the UA dorm hall. The living space is occupied by Deku, Occhako, Todoroki, Momo, Mina, Hagurke, and Oijiro. Crowding the 16-year-old girl who smiles in response to the questions she is getting asked.
“Hey, leave L/N alone. She just got here. She’s a new student” Aizawa says in his yellow sleeping bag. Completely zipped up like a slug crawling over to the UA students who give Y/N warm smiles like crazy. 
“Who is she?” Bakugou asks crossing his arms as Eijiro walks up to the group. A small smile spreads across his face and a toothy grin plasters on it. “I am Y/N L/N! I got transferred here.” You smile at everyone. Many students give you a wave or others like Mina, and Hagurke crowds you and ask you questions about boys, or if you do your makeup.
You nod your head once in a while and shake your head a lot more than you pleased yourself. Beneath the grasp of it all. Eijiro stands there breathlessly for a moment wearing his long sleeve black shirt. His eyes move downward and the reds of his hair move with them as he tilts it. Your hoodie is a little rolled up as wounds, on your spread across, scarring,  bruises. Many are bruises that are purple piling up on one another while others are open sores and cuts that are pink and some blood peaks through the skin. “So L/N! What’s your quirk?!” Midoriya asks you eyeing your eyes with a serious intention. 
Midoriya holds a notebook in his hand and he gets ready to jot down information on you. His pen ready at the marks. You glance at the red haired boy and see him looking at the blisters, soars, and bruises on you rolled up sleeve. You avert the red haired boy’s gaze and you shake Midoriya away, your hoodie quickly pulled down once you grasped the thought of it again.
“I loved talking to you Midoriya but I have to go. I gotta go bye guys” You say smiling as you look at Aizawa who is unzipped in his sleeping bag and wearing his all-black outfit paired with his hair now being tied back in a bun. Most of the fan girls think your new teacher was a hottie. But you just don’t understand, most are minors while he is a fully grown adult!
“Your room is down the hallway.” Aizawa says with a grumpy voice. You follow along him and you can feel Eijiro’s gaze still on you even when you turn your back to him leaving him alone. Many images cross your mind on what he was going to say or do once he sees you.
Aizawa walks you to your dorm room but he knew. He knew what Eijiro saw, getting you worked up so of course he gruffly mumbles, “Don’t worry Kirishima won’t tell a soul.” You let out a nod followed by a sigh escaping past your lips. The sound filling your heart so you can breath once more.
“Do you think-” You start off before Aizawa opens up your dorm room. Pulling you inside and shutting the door. “Kirishima won’t tell anyone L/N, I promise. He has the same wounds on his body that you do.” Aizawa says to you. Your eyes widen in a second and Aizawa’s footsteps leave, your mind filling with thoughts.
You ramble under your breath as you feel your nervousness take over you. “What if Kirishima gets pissed off about me giving him scarrs over the years? Or-or him being mad that I just walked away?! What if he gets mad and asks me questions!? I don’t want to relive my stupid trauma I escaped from just for it to follow me at UA!” You scream grabbing a pillow from the door and yelling your heart out into it.
~~~~3 months later~~~~
So you have been avoiding Kirishima since the first time you saw him coming into UA. He sees you at times and his eyes fill with sadness and regret as he quickly tries to follow you and talk to you, his soulmate. He tries but you run off. You haven’t heard him talk at all and each time you glance at him you run off avoiding the man like crazy. But, you're scared he is going to judge you, your scars. You are scared he is going to judge you as a whole and the terrible history you come from.
Your h/c locks fall in front of your face as you open the door to your dorm room. Your tired eyes feel like they could close as you yawn a little. You close the door and your feet carry you to your bed. There your eyes go wide, Eijiro Kirishima stands in front of you and he crosses his arms as his red hair is no longer up and gelled. Just normal and it looks very soft making you think about it for a moment or two.
Kirishima’s eyes look like they are going to be on the edge of tears with the way you are looking at him. “I-I.” He starts off with his lip quivering and his “manly” voice falters. He closes his eyes before he starts up again still closing his eyes tight, the warm tears roll down his face and to the ground.“
I-I…..Y/N we need to talk.” Kirishima says softly his tears still coming. You look at him and shake your head as you reach for the door. Your hand grasps the handle and Kirishima grabs your wrist quickly reacting his red eyes pleading with yours for you to understand. “This isn’t a
request. Please. I am your soulmate. You avoid me.” Kirishima says as he pulls you away from the door, and you fight against him.
You try to keep your calm and you look at him still seeing him cry, “Y/N listen. You are my soulmate. I feel your pain, I know what is happening to you so tell me please. I will listen.” Kirishima eyes you. “Y/N, I am begging you. I know that someone hurt you, so let me help.” He pleads with you.
You take a sigh and a world renowned sigh escapes past your lips. “You can’t help Kirishima. So leave.” You beckon him trying to get him to remove his hold on your wrist. 
“Please.” He begs once more, his tears pool in his eyes and he cries. 
“Fine! You want to know!? My dad! My dad hurt me! I was only 5 when he did, he hurt me with his own hands, and used bear bottles just to make it peirce through my skin! Happy!? I try so hard to not let anyone else see. It looks like I hurt myself but I don’t! My father was sick enough to hurt me and I have to live wih the scarring! The physical pain still there! The mental! That has been hurt for so long!” You scream at him. 
Kirishima looks at you with a sympathetic gaze and you feel, water dripping down your cheeks. More make their way down. A sob escapes you and you cry as you try to shake his hand off your wrist.
Kirishima doesn’t let you go and his other hand wraps you in a hug. You feel his hand on your wrist die off and his hand holds the back of your head, running his fingers through. The other holds your abdominal area where he holds you against you. You stuff your face in his chest and your sobs fill the room. More tears peak their way down and every once in a while he’ll say things along the lines of, “ Your okay, I promise.” to “Calm down. Everything’s okay.” While that wasn’t happening he rubbed his fingers against your head running his fingers through.
You continue to cry and feel like a child in front of your own soulmate. “Thank you Kirishima.” You sniffle moving your head away from his chest and looking into his eyes. “No problem, Y/N.” Kirishima smiles softly the spikes of his spiky teeth show a little.
There you are, looking at each other. With your soulmate beside you. Tears still spill like a stream but you feel safe. More safer than you did when just living at UA, away from your father. You feel safe knowing that your soulmate doesn’t blame you for the scars he has also but he is just willing to listen, comfort, and console you. While he went and dealt with that pain too, he still keeps smiling for you, Y/N L/N.
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polarpolarpolarx · 4 months
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FORREAL WE NEED YOU AND YOUR MUSIC BACK RI!
I came back into the fandom now after not being into kpop since 2018 but before then i was a VIP (Top bias lol 💀) since 2012.
Imagine my suprise when i come back and see the fandom split into ot5 and ot4/3 (who are mostly just GD solo stans or Ri haters), the korean fans acting wild, TOP and that cropped picture, Youngbae and his vague statements... I saw many fans of Seungri on twitter sharing resources on his case so i read up on it and yeah... the way the public for some reason just wanted this man guilty is beyond me.
Now we have Dae and his statements in his Japan show (love him) and Ji and his cryptic insta stories (i'll take what i can get).
The craziest part is people wanting to erase him from BB as if he wasn't the glue that kept them together that long in the first place, c'mon. Saw someone say "they were destined to be dysfunctional" if it wasn't for him and like yeah...
Anyway i'm happy there's still some places on tumblr to vent to and that he's back living his life among friends, aging backwards (seriously wtf) and being unapologetic about it.
Ahahahaaaaa it's a sorry state to come back to, isn't it? I didn't find out about Bigbang until/because of Seungri's thing so I literally have had nothing but this burning trashboat of "content" to pick around in, literally can't imagine being a fan during MADE, ugh it must've been AMAZINGGGGG T_T! I do hope they'll come back. I've been severely distanced from the fanbase for a while now so am not sure what's going on/the speculations on that, but, here's hoping. Last I saw was GD signing with some American label? And that he's apparently once again giving cryptic statements of his own about yet another "comeback." Lolll. Seungri remains superior. Aging backwards and unapologetic INDEED!
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mlobsters · 5 months
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supernatural s1e16 shadow (w. eric kripke)
aka the first time i had a full-tilt meltdown over this show.
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rexscanonwife · 3 months
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Naw but the way Charles literally has a spidey sense when somethings wrong with the boys 😭🙏💖💖
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johndonneswife · 2 months
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someone really should be talking about how difficult it is to plan a wedding - a gay wedding - when both of your families fucking suck
#who is talking about this!!!! let me know#idk i have 0 expectations for my family but they still somehow always manage to let me down which#i was anticipating#and i didn’t think i would care because i have never cared before#but liiiiiike.#i wasn’t expecting to feel sad rofl but my family is so fucking flaky. again i KNOW THIS i know i cannot rely on any of them#it’s annoying when i have given them a year and a half to make plans and i have had so many people tell me they would be there#just to back out or ghost or come up with some excuse#like do you know how expensive weddings are 😭 JUST fucking be honest with me and rsvp no#anyway i was very intentional with the few family members i did invite#and specifically invited people i have a rapport with / had a good (ish lol) relationship with growing up#people i have bent over backwards trying to please!!! and dropping everything to help them out#and they can’t even be bothered to communicate with me lol it’s fine. like. i do feel like it’s internalized homophobia at this point#or maybe they have hated me this entire time which is totally plausible#but they KNOW how much ayesha means to me and knows that no one from her family is coming to our wedding#at the end of the day it’s going to be like. 5 people from my family 1 from ayesha’s (her brother) and like 30-40 friends#which i am so grateful for obviously#i sound like such a brat but it’s also like - watching your family continuously choose drugs/alcohol over showing up for you - lol#AGAIN i’m used to this and expected as much but i’m still feeling bad#just rsvp so i can move on with my life please. stop telling me you’re trying to make it work when we both know you aren’t#i have so much more to say but i’m going to sound crazy even though i knooooow it is homophobia like i Know it#i think there are certain people i will finally go no contact with for good after this#which is a freeing thought but i only invited v few family members to begin with. there’s abt to be no one left lmao#probably for the best#ugh whatever#again i can’t help but feel a certain way when they have done more/traveled further for relatives they hardly know#meanwhile i was forced to spend so much of my life living for these people and for them alone#AAAAAAAA i just want to scream#text
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milo-is-rambling · 1 year
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Oh okay I've now realized that my last group of friends has completely fucked my ability to form new close relationships or find myself worthy of interacting with people I perceive to be better than me (aka all people)
#just sitting here like :|#i know that feeling of like every time you lose someone in your life a part of you goes with them but I didn't realize how bad it was until#i got into a situation where I tried to make new friends and then it's just my brain wondering when they're gonna turn on me and I'll be#hated by a new group of people and I keep trying so hard to patch things up and make new friends and it's just like every time no one wants#to talk about anything that went wrong they simply want to leave without explanation or sympathy#i feel like I've been alone so long that I forgot how to be a person around other people#I'm wearing my person suit and just keep repeating 'be yourself' but I didn't fucking know who I am when I'm not completely alone drowning#out my thoughts with as much Pinterest music and stupid tv I can handle at once#like ugh I just wish I hadn't fucked everything up so bad with my last few groups of friends#i just want to feel like myself again and everytime i just barely start to feel like myself I find new friends and as I adapt to them they#leave and I'm alone again and I have to find who I really am all over again#why do I change for other people? i don't even realize I'm doing it until it's too late#ughhhhhhh#i am just exhausted#and my head hurts and I feel gross and tired and I want to cry and today is 75 days since my dad died and I've been thinking about him a lot#and I'm just so fucking exhausted and sad and emotional and I just want someone to fucking like and for me to believe them
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starlesseyes · 2 years
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#hello it's 4 am and i'm lonely#i feel very disconnected from everyone in my life#like not to sound like a 14yo emo on main but no one understands me lmao#i just want to be with someone who feels like home#someone who loves the things i love and not just because i love them so we can actually bond over them and i won't feel like a fuckin freak#or worse that i'm just being tolerated or they're not even listening to me and just zoning out while i gush over things#i can literally feel when people don't care about what i'm talking about and it makes me feel so small and stupid and humiliated and LONELY#lately my best friend has been telling me how sad she is bc she feels like no one will ever love her romantically#and it hurts me to hear bc i know she's wonderful and deserving of love but i can't possibly convince her of that yknow#and it's weird bc i feel this way about myself too but i don't think much about it? or i didn't before she started telling me how she felt#like before this i was just coming to terms with my last relationship and thinking about the self work i wanna do before i try dating again#but lately i've been crying every single night thinking i'll never get my shit together and therefore no one will ever want to date me#like i truly feel unworthy of romantic love#ugh i probably should just let myself go to sleep when i have these thoughts lmao instead of staying up and dwelling on them#i'm definitely sleepy enough#i just don't want tomorrow to come bc then i'll have to go to work again. i want to enjoy the peaceful nighttime just a little bit longer.
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womb-complex · 19 days
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Oh god I’m crying so muchh… how am I supposed to tell the little girl all those years ago that she isn’t gonna end up with the person she thought was her soulmate. That it won’t work no matter how much she tried. You’ll never be that happy with them ever again because nothing ever seems to go right and the relationship wont ever be the same. and how the hell am I supposed to be okay with that forever
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nullians · 9 months
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bewby · 1 year
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loving all my friends so much and caring for them and wanting to connect to them properly but being terrible at talking to anyone is literally a nightmare it makes me so sad. and i used to be able to talk to people better too and i don't know why it's suddenly so terrible since this year? like? i think it's because of my job in a way and i'm just so. fucking. exhausted. but i wish it would just stop! i miss my friends !!!!! I MISS THEM!!!! i don't wanna be like this!!!!! i'm really sad!!!!!
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loaksbitch · 1 year
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blame tumblr for deleting my draft and make me rework this with rush— now girlies, imagine jealous neteyam pull you to his side, claiming you as his yes? this is the long awaited update (pt 3) of the i trusted you series.
warnings - hard angst, vulgar language, jealous neteyam i repeat, JEALOUSY NETEYAM! ugh, cussing, neteyam is tired of hurting and trying, kiri is best girl for boosting up neteyam to make a step kinda? that’s it for now!
likes and reblogs are appreciated for the final part! i love each and every one of you babies mwah!! — 3.2k wc and poor-ish grammar
“i want to trust you.” — neteyam sully (★,꩜)
here’s part (one) – (two) — (four) of this series
neteyam’s state wasn’t good when he went back home.
you’re leaving the clan because of him, you’re leaving your home, your childhood, your everything because of him.
you’re leaving him because of him.
still not accepting the words you’ve said to him, he hadn’t noticed his younger sister waiting for him right when he got back to the village, hunting long forgotten.
kiri on other hand had enough, she’s tired of seeing her brother suffer for what he was trying to make right, especially after that night. the night she saw her perfect brother kneel in front of a female na’vi begging you not to go.
“neteyam,” his name being called, pulls him out from his thoughts and his tired eyes land on his sister who has her arms crossed against her chest. “what part of leave me alone don’t they understand?” neteyam silently says under his breath
“you know i can hear you right?” kiri scoffs
“what part of i want to be alone don’t you all understand?” this time he says it clearly and louder. neteyam doesn’t give her time before walking past her and if only if it wasn't for her next words? he wouldn’t have frozen at his spot.
“if you love her, go for her.”
there she goes again, now he needs to tell her he doesn’t want to hear anything about that future mate of his, that female na’vi he doesn’t even want.
“kiri.” he starts to turn and face her, his amber eyes swollen and puffy it makes her sad. “i’ll say this for the last time, i don’t want anyone to bring äy—“
“i’m not talking about äyea and you know it.”
his heart dropped, amber eyes slightly widening like he was caught. neteyam searches for more explanation from his sister, kiri softly smiles and he definitely knows who she’s talking about
“y/n, neteyam, i’m talking about y/n.” his skin itches at your name being called and he walks fast to his sister before grabbing her by her arms. nobody has to know, not like this and he won't risk to lose you like this
“look, you can’t tell no one, okay?” he’s shaking his sister so hard that her shoulders are hurting. “i can't lose her, if the clan knows they’ll take her away from me.” his body is trembling, neteyam’s mind was too occupied with the worst scenarios that would happen if they find out about you just like this.
kiri closes her eyes and calms herself before trying to do the same for her brother. “nete, calm down” she places her small hands on his cheek. “you’ve to calm down, for her?” she knew you’re his weakness and he would do anything with your name
“i won’t tell anyone.” kiri watches neteyam’s eyes blink, confused and processing her words, “but you must tell them, everyone, tell everyone neteyam.”
he’s slowly sliding his hands down her arms and letting her go, what is she saying?
“i saw everything, the night she knew about it and how you were.” kiri didn’t want to look like she sneaked into someone's business. “i’ve never seen you so weak like this brother, you’re giving up something that makes you happy.”
where is this going? why is she not yelling at him that he failed to be perfect?
“i know you’re soon to be mated but why when you’re not happy? not wanting it, not in love.” neteyam takes every word of hers carefully. “if this is the future you want with her then make a progress.”
“i’m tired of hearing you cry yourself to sleep, starve yourself and worry mom and dad.” he felt like a child. “i’m sorry,” he murmurs and kiri sighs, “you don’t have to apologize for everything.”
neteyam was feeling his heartbeats quickening at his younger sister's words but it’s also painful when he remembers he can’t do that cause you’re gonna be gone, soon… very soon.
“she’s le-leaving,” his words are cut when his voice quivers, kiri gasps at the news. “she said she feels like she doesn’t belong here.” he’s now looking down to avoid kiri’s eyes or he’ll cry
“she’s leaving me, kiri” his sister only pulls him close to hug him and he drops his body on her, head on her shoulder. “i love her and she’s leaving, i’m losing her.” he wants the pain to end, he’s tired of hurting
“oh brother.” kiri pats his head, even though neteyam was the smartest and perfect to hide his emotions, this was too much. he’s literally crumbling down. “it’ll be okay, everything will be okay.”
“it will be okay, everything will be okay.” your mother pats your hair when you lean on her shoulders and cry. all you do is cry, you feel bad.
you’re debating on leaving everything behind and running to your neteyam but then again there’s his future mate being a wall to your love. “it’ll be over soon when we leave.”
if not soulmates why bound to fall in love and hurt?
eywa was not fair, she’s not fair with her doings and you don’t want it. you want him, you want your man, you want neteyam, you miss him so bad.
the ritual is in two days and you’re not ready to watch them or give them your blessing as a part of a clan. once the ceremony is done you know they’ll go home, you don’t even want to think what they’ll do after that.
they’ll have a fruit of love, a baby in the future… what about you? supposed to move on? no, you can’t do that.
“we’ve got to get ready, my sweet child,” your mother says as she eyes the hammock that sheltered you for years. everything is packed, ready and done.
while you’re struggling to make the pain hurt less, neteyam is struggling to make his heart beat less.
it’s now an eclipse and everyone is ready for dinner, “mom! what’s for dinner?” tuk whines when netyiri brings the bowls and trays at the wooden table. “you’ll see baby” she kneels down to finally join her family.
it doesn’t fail to catch her by surprise when her first born is sat across the right side of the table. “neteyam?” her eyes start to whelm when her son smiles at her, oh how she missed having him around the table to eat with them.
“he’s here just like you want him.” jake says and neteyam nods.
neytiri only lets soft laugh out and places a bowl for him. “eat this, it’ll help you get strength for your training.” she motions him to take his food.
kiri silently watches everyone, a smile painting her lips as she sips on her soup.
“tastes good?” neteyam nervously nods, the only thing he’s thinking is a way to bring up his love topic to them. it wasn’t much late before he’s opening his mouth to speak and lo’ak suddenly interrupted
“dad, mom i ne–…”
“tuk stop doing that, you’ll choke.” lo’ak scolds at his sister and neteyam shuts his lips quick. maybe it’s the right thing not to say anything right now.
“tuk, listen to your brother honey” jake says and turns to neteyam, “what were you saying son?”
neteyam shakes his head, “never mind i’ll talk to you guys later.” he doesn’t ignore how kiri lightly groans when he backs out. “i’ll head inside now.” he rubs his sweaty hands on his thighs and gets back to his feet
“you didn’t even touch your food.” now that’s a lie, he actually scooped two times and ate.
“i ate mom, it’s delicious t-thanks.” he hates when the last word breaks. on eywa he’s so nervous.
kiri was quick to follow his steps when he left and luckily her parents didn't question. she was fast to catch up with her brother and yanks his arms to make him face her, “what was that?” she raises her eyebrows
“what was what?”
“don’t play dumb with me right now.” kiri warns and neteyam clears his throat
“i’m scared okay!” he hissed, “i’m so fucking nervous my skin is crawling to leave my bones.” his sister only rolls her eye, “seriously— we’ve talked about this! not being a little scared ass to be telling them.”
“what happened to that?” she crosses her arms.
“kiri,” he sighs and drops his head down, shoulders easing. “you don’t understand how dangerous this is, what if–“
“what if they hurt her?”
neteyam was awfully silent and that answers her question. “you know mom and dad, they don’t do anything about what you care and love…” kiri slowly stops when neteyam shakes his head
“not them,” it’s not them he’s scared of, it’s äyea’s parents he’s scared of, he knows they would do anything to make their little perfect daughter that matches with him, or whatever they say.
kiri presses her lips to a straight line before clicking her tongue.
this is gonna be a bad idea or the best idea she has ever made and decided to tell him aways. neteyam’s eyes widen when his sister pulls him away from their family, what she’s gonna tell him is the only chance to get you back and win your trust and she’s sure neteyam will do it,
do anything for you.
೫ time skip — mating ritual ceremony
your new outfit makes your curves more defined, way more defined than your usual loin clothes that you wear.
your skin shining smoothly, the leaves barely covering your breast, you looked ethereal with your hair not braided and freely displayed all over your shoulders
“honey, are you ready?”
your mother’s words make you gulp and suck a deep breath. “we must be there early to leave early!” she tells while being in the other room.
you finally check yourself and talk back, “yeah, i’m ready.” you whisper morley to yourself? swallowing the lump on your throat.
“yeah, i’m ready.” neteyam closes his eyes and breaths trying to focus on not messing up everything, he’s not even sure if you’ll show up and some part of him wishes you do show up
extra loincloths and decorations on his body makes him uncomfortable with its weight crushing him down.
netyiri proudly looks at her son’s figure while the kids are outside, “mother.” the sudden call of her name, netyiri answers quickly. “what is it? nervous?”
neteyam gulps down his fear and walks to her, “i love you” netyiri feels her eyes tear up and smile at him, “your mom loves you too, baby.” neteyam envelopes her with a hug and netyiri cries to his shoulder telling him how he’s grown up
“now don’t mess my face up with tears! let’s get you ready there.” it’s time to face reality and wait for his soon to be mate come
when he’s out of his hammock, he’s greeted with his family smiling at him and jake’s proud smile. even half of the clan was standing at his hammock.
“neteyam te suli tsyeyk'itan” everyone chants and neteyam feels his inside clench in discomfort. he doesn’t want this if it’s not with you, everything makes him sick. “c’mon son, let’s get you to the trees of voice, your mate is waiting.”
what the fuck, that was what neteyam said inside his head. what does his father mean when he’s gonna meet his mate under the trees of voice? it was all about you and him, neteyam would never mate with some random girl he is set up with in a place with memories filled with yours
neteyam turns to his sister and kiri has the same expression because what is this bullshit?
“nete’ she’s waiting for you.” his mother placed her hand on his back. no, no, no— his own feet are betraying him when he realize he’s walking and the clan opens way for him straight long line created till where he’s supposed to see äyea
you on other hand stand in line with the people and pray under your breath for eywa to give you a strength not to cry or make a scene, especially when they will be bound where you thought you and neteyam would have been
it doesn’t take long when starts to cheer as the future Olo'eyktan starts to get closer and closer.
lo’ak was the first one you saw from the sully families while he’s holding tuk close to him so she won’t get lost in the crowed. “Aeyaeyaeyaeyaye!” the clan yells
neteyam’s eyes keep searching for specific someone which is you, eyes desperately looking for you and feeling more scared and anxious when he can’t figure out your face from the crowd he takes a deep breath
you finally take his figure to your sight and god he was so beautiful.
your breath hitches at his appearance, the dangling material on his forehead making him look more attractive than he already is, you realize it’s so hard to let go of him.
you suck a deep breath when his eyes lands at yours and neteyam halts his pace, confusing everyone for a second. your tears are fast to blur your vision and you blink before looking away from him
his heart cracks when you do look away, you don’t want to see him and he understands
once neteyam passed you, the crowd surrounds him and cheers when he stepped close to where äyea is found.
you hate how your mother looks at you sympathetically while her hands grip yours tighter, “it’ll be over soon” she whispers to you but you shrug her off, only watching things unfold in front of you as your heart breaks
“it will be over soon.” neteyam says to himself
it’s sickening how everyone can’t notice this is not supposedly to happen, kiri’s plan better work or he’ll seriously fuck this ritual up and run away with you.
“son.” äyea’s father greets him and neteyam, bringing his hand to his forehead. “ty’mar, i see you.” he then turns to his soon to be mate’s mother and repeat his actions.
the way äyea was smiling makes your throat hurt from desperately wanting to cry.
‘no, don’t tell her you see her neteyam. please. please.’
äyea softly giggles when neteyam stands in front of her and blush, “neteyam te suli tsyeyk'itan” the way she tries to voice out his name makes neteyam feel sick.
“i see you.” she says but neteyam doesn’t bother to say it back making her smile slightly fall.
netyiri also notices how neteyam is acting, what would possibly be bothering him? definitely not everything.
after everyone was introduced to each other, the ceremony began. drinks were served, everyone clapping and dancing to the songs the na’vi’s are singing.
you’re a little far away from the crowd to breath clear air and dry your tears that constantly burn your eyes. your eyes are on neteyam who isn’t enjoy one bit of the ceremony while his soon to be mate squirms and waves her hands up
both of them are sitting on a throne-like wooden chair, both of their parents beside them just say like them.
this is so depressing how awkward and uncomfortable it looks and actually is. you think, brining the drink to your mouth
you didn’t notice the na’vi male sneaking behind you that actually has been staring at you since you joined the crowd in line. “enjoying the party from far doesn’t seem too boring after all.”
you’re now jumping in fear when a breath hits the back of your ear.
“mother eyaw! who the fu–” you scream and stumble in panic, but before you’re falling you feel strong arms hold you on your ground. “shit, I should've announced i came, i’m sorry.”
you’re about to tell him it’s okay and leave when he’s offering his hand for a shake.
“i’m no’xus, by the way.” great, now you’re stuck talking with someone.
“y/n.” you say and turn over to place your drink on the talk flat table looking object, it’s obvious you’re ignoring him and uninterested but he keeps talking
“why’re you not dancing?” the tall na’vi asks and you face him before speaking, “because i don’t want to?” you just want this over and privacy, how hard can it get to understand!?
“mhm,” the male hums, “wanna dance with me?” at his offer, you scoff mentally and realize you’re not getting him away from you soon– before you reject him, a strong glare radiating from far makes your body tingle
it was neteyam, sending glares to the male who was next to you while sitting far away.
you didn’t bother it at first but the way neteyam’s face twists makes your brow raise. why is he bothered? jealous? if no’xus had not cleared his throat, you would’ve forgotten about what he just said.
“look notoxo, i really don’t feel like…” you watch him awkwardly chuckle and correct you.
“it’s no’xus not notoxo.”
“you know what? fuck it, let’s dance.” you’re pulling him to the crowd, maybe it’s the drink or maybe it’s him, it’s neteyam making you do this.
your mother was long gone to where you don’t know, no’xus was just a bonus to get your frustration out and you’re now dancing with him. too occupied to bother, you haven’t noticed how neteyam’s nose are flaring in anger
neteyam watches how you’re dancing and it’s very obvious it’s targeted to get him out of his mind
he is not even listening to äeya and brought himself up from his throne-like seat. rage and anger is in him, this needs to fucking stop or he’ll rip the male’s hand that’s holding you by your waist and moving you sides to side
all of his fear gone when the na’vi’s eyes are on him when he’s stepping down from his seat and walking straight to you
neteyam ignores his father’s call, sight on you and you only. you didn’t notice how he’s dangerously close until no’xus stopped his moving. “what is it?” you’re annoyed when your distracted self is brought back to reality
“put your hands off of her.” it was an order and no’xus looked at him manically. “i’m not fucking repeating myself.” all the na’vi’s are confused, even his parents and äeya’s family.
your body is jerked away from the stranger you just met and you hiss when neteyam tugs you close to him. what is he thinking? in front of everyone? his last words makes the whole omatikaya village gasp and whisper.
“fucking let go of what’s mine and find your own mate.” neteyam scowl’s dangerously.
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how’re we feeling, sweets? are we feeling anxious? excited? invested? spill in the comments cause i love reading your thoughts sjsjsj
also do you guys want a toe curling smut at the end or no? since neteyam is aged up!20 years old in this series, lmk in the comments if you want smut — tag list in the comments <3
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thefatedthoughtofyou · 7 months
Text
{ Thank you for the idea @imsodonewiththissite !! It almost got angsty but i controlled myself!!! }
"What in God's name is that?" Dustin’s voice goes almost shrill as he walks behind Steve, looks down at his pumpkin. Eddie's head shoots up from where he's carving his own pumpkin, his legs shot out in front of him, his feet hitting Steve's across from him. Steve flushes, tells Dustin to shut up, and shoves at his legs to get him to move on.
"Alright alright jeez! It's just... I've never seen a pumpkin like that. Did you even try?" Dustin huffs as he settles back into his own carving area between Lucas and Will.
"Yes. I did try. Thank you very much. Henderson." Steve huffs, wipes at his pumpkin, then wipes his hand in the grass to get the bits of guts off. Eddie sits up taller, making a show of trying to see Steve's carving, but not really trying to see, they'd agreed to show each other at the same time.
Steve hadn't really had any idea what to do, so he'd just done something silly. But he could see Will and Dustin’s and theirs were detailed, and spooky. And his just looked... stupid, now. Steve sighed and put the top back on his, waiting for Eddie to finish.
He was staring, he knew he was. He couldn't help it. He loved when Eddie was in full concentration mode, his tongue poking out between his lips, his brows crinkled. Steve would never tell him that. But he could look. No harm in that.
Eddie looked up and met his eyes, smiled brightly, and dusted of his own pumpkin before popping the top back on. He tilted his head, this way and that, a few times and then looked at Steve again.
"Okay. You ready?" He asked, drumming his fingers on the gourd resting under his hands. Steve scrunched his nose.
"I'm having second thoughts." He said quietly, the kids were all yelling, in their own little world, but he still didn't want them to hear.
"Aww. But I'm excited to see it! Especially with the way Dusty Buns reacted." Eddie drooped, his eyes going wide and sad, the way Steve was weak agaisnt. He sighed, his own body drooping.
"Ugh. Fine. On three?" He tilted his head. Eddie nodded.
"On three."
"One."
"Twosie." Eddie wiggled his fingers, Steve rolled his eyes fondly.
"Three!" They both said it together and turned their pumpkins toward each other.
Steve's eyes shot open, Eddie's was... good. Like really good. Everything a spooky jack-o-lantern should be. Creepy eyes, sharp teeth, what looked like a skull nose.
"Holy shit Eds. That's... holy shit. Mine is so shit compared to- why are you making that face? What's happening?" Steve changed directions mid sentence because Eddie's mouth had dropped open as he stared at Steve hideous excuse for a carving.
"Oh my god you hate it." Steve grabbed at his pumpkin, about to turn it back toward him and hide it forever but he froze when a sound started coming out of Eddie's open mouth.
It took a moment to really form, but once it got going, Steve could hear it. Manical giggles were bubbling up out of Eddie's mouth. He slapped his hands over his face to stop them but they just kept coming.
Steve wasn't sure if he should be offended or not. He frowned though, his brows dropping on his head and Eddie immediately shook his head.
"Oh my god he's ADORABLE!" Eddie cackled the words, shoved his own pumpkin genlty aside and crawled toward Steve's, his hands outstreched and grabbing.
"I know it's- wait what?" Steve was so confused.
"Steve I love him. Look at his stupid little face." He'd devolved into baby talk and was scratching at the pumkin like you would a babies chin. Steve felt himself smiling.
"Wait you actually like it?" Dustin guffawed from behind him. Eddie spun around fast, guarding Steve's pumpkin from sight.
"Excuse me?! 'It'? Don't you ever speak like that about my son- our son!" He jerked his thumb over his shoulder at Steve. Dustin rolled his eyes.
"It's not even scary! It's just a big mouth!" Dustin’s hands flailed. Eddie screamed at him dramatically, clutching his chest.
"He has a tooth! And two adorable teeny tiny eyes!" Eddie moved, pointed at the face Steve had made. El and Will both aw-d, Max and Lucas smiled, Mike just rolled his eyes.
"He's not- it's just-" Dustin stammered a bit.
"What? Dustin. He's what?!" Eddie asked, his hands still clutching at his chest.
"He's ugly! Okay? It's an ugly pumpkin!" Dustin yelled, Steve didn't even have time to feel hurt, because Eddie shrieked again, his voice going impossibly high.
"Dustin Henderson! I can't believe you just called your brother ugly. You heathen!" Eddie practically hissed the last word before he hopped to his feet and bundled Steve's pumpkin into his arms.
"Unbelievable. We don't need them Steve. Let's go." He popped his nose into the air and looked to Steve. He knew he had to look like a deer in headlights, not sure exactly where they were meant to be going.
"Kitchen." Eddie whispered, giving Steve a wink.
"Oh right. Okay yeah." Steve stumbled toward the door, opening it for Eddie as he stomped after him.
"Oh what you're going inside? Just leaving us out here?" Dustin called, Will and El booing him as he kept taunting Steve and Eddie. Eddie spun, looked at Dustin, propped the pumpkin on his hip like a toddler and pointed his finger accusingly.
"Yes. And we are leaving... in a huff!" Eddie's accent sounded slightly French at the end as he spun around again and stomped into the house.
"Slam the door Steven. Show them we mean it." Eddie said with an air finality. Steve grinned, fighting back laughter, and slammed the door. He tugged the blind closed too, for good measure. He turned to find Eddie wiping at the pumpkin with a wet washrag, getting all the little shavings off.
"You didn't have to do that." Steve said, moving to stand next to him. But not too close.
"Do what?" Eddie asked, grabbing the dish towel off the little hook and drying the pumpkin now. Steve sighed, leaned his butt against the counter and looked at the floor.
"Play it up liked you love the pumpkin. To make me feel better about my complete lack of skill." Steve laughed a little, shrugged, and looked up to find Eddie staring at him. He tossed the towel down and took a step forward.
"Oh no. Unfortunately for you, Steven. That was a genuine reaction. I fucking love this thing." He patted at the side of the pumpkin and grinned at Steve. Steve frowned.
"Really? It's not... I mean it's nothing special. Did you see Will's, I swear there was a castle on it." Steve shook his head. Dismissive.
"Oh I saw it. Still like yours more." Eddie said, matter of fact.
"Why?" Steve was still frowning. Eddie sighed, walked over and stood next to Steve, his arm pressed agaisnt him, warm.
"Me and my mom used to buy four pumpkins. Every Halloween. Always four. Two for her. And two for me." Eddie's voice was soft, the way it always was when he talked about his mother. Steve found himself trying not to breathe to loudly, he wanted to hear everything Eddie had to say.
"We'd each do a classic, spooky guy. But the other one. The other one we used to make just... the most ridiculous faces. Or the dumbest ones. Anything cute and silly." He looked at Steve for a moment, a soft smile on his lips at the memory.
"It very quickly became a contest of who could make who laugh the most. Just by carving some silly face." Eddie shook his head and laughed gently.
"I haven't made a funny one since she died. And you turned that pumpkin around and it took me back. To all those stupid pumpkins and how we used to laugh. And I mean really laugh." Eddie's voice was getting tight as he spoke, a little wobbly, and Steve wanted to hug him, wasn't sure if he could.
"She had the best laugh Steve. She'd have loved this." He moved his hand over the pumpkin again, gently stroked down it's side.
"And you."
It was almost too quiet. Steve almost didn't hear it. Wasn't sure he had until he looked up and saw the way Eddie was looking at him. Steve is so sure that it's the same way he'd been looking at Eddie for months now.
"It's the perfect pumpkin Steve. The best one I've seen in years." He's so serious, when he says it. Steve feels like he might cry. Feels a bit reckless, with Eddie looking at him like that. So he leans toward Eddie, his heart fluttering as Eddie smiles, just a barely thing, and leans toward him too.
The kiss is soft, Eddie makes a little sound in the back of his throat when Steve's hand moves to his neck and pulls him closer. They kiss until they're both smiling so much it's just their teeth clicking together and Eddie dissolves into manic giggles again and buries his face in Steve's neck as he holds him close.
"You have a good laugh too Ed's. " Steve sighs, pulling Eddie closer as he hums and nuzzles into his neck, his fingers pressing into Steve's back as he cuddles closer. Steve breathes deeply, his nose buried in Eddie's hair, and feels Eddie smile against the soft skin of his neck.
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( below is an approximation of their pumpkin faces. I fucked up the eddie one's mouth dont looookk at meeeee )
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plutoasteroids · 25 days
Text
PAC How Will Your Future Spouse View You
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Pile 1 Pile 2 Pile 3
DISCLAIMER THIS IS A GENERAL READING TAKE WHAT RESONATES AND LEAVE WHAT DOESN'T.
Strictly for entertainment purposes.
PILE 1
So, before I get into the tarot bit of the reading the overall vibe I am getting is that you and your future spouse will be that couple that are still doing cute stuff together even in old age. You know those older couples you see on TikTok on dates still happy and very much in love, yeah like that. One word I can use to describe it is cozy, just very warm and affectionate basically feeling like this person is your home. It's going to be like 'I'd rather come home to you then be anywhere else'.
On to the tarot bit, Your FS sees you as someone very confident and optimistic (even if you don't see yourself that way). They see you as being positive and very wholesome. Again, before I pulled cards I channelled and I still got the warmth.
Oh my gosh, if any of you have read The Song of Achilles that's basically it. Before anyone points out to me they were a same sex couple .Yes, I know but I am talking about the relationship dynamic between Patroclus and Achilles.
You may have gone through a difficult time in your life and your future spouse will admire how strong and resilient you are, how you're able to adapt to challenges and changes in environment. You may be the type of person who is connected to both their divine feminine and masculine and they truly find that attractive.
They certainly view you as their other half and I know its cliche to say soulmate but that's all your future spouse is saying. You just give them so much happiness and emotional fulfilment.
'They are my home, my soulmate, my forever'
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PILE 2
Ugh Pile 2 your spouse will literally worship you😩. Like you'll tell them your insecurities and they'll just sit there kissing every scar, mark, dimple anything you're insecure about they'll adore. If you're a female or a feminine reading this and you have thick thighs I heard them say 'Come here and crush my skull with those sexy thighs'. Whoever you are you have someone's poor child down horrendous for you.
I think they may be the type to just watch your social media whether you are getting to know each other, dating, engaged or married your social media pages, pictures and videos will always be on their phone screen and they won't go to sleep without listening to a little voice message you sent. Once they get attached baby there's absolutely no getting rid of them, I heard 'You'll have an easier time getting rid of bed bugs'.
When you meet them, they may be a party animal or a player.
Disclaimer it's not toxic obsession more like they will let you be your own person but at the end of the day they are yours and you are theirs, you are their spouse, and they are your spouse and they will forever put you on a pedestal not to the open where they will neglect themselves.
They see you as a prize (again not in a creepy way) You may have options when you meet this person but best believe they'll make sure to stand out and win you over. They see you as the best the world has to offer in terms of what a wife/husband/spouse should be. Your person may have had a few letdowns when it came to love and just know that they see you as a dream come true and again, I know that's very cliche but trust me when Isay they view having you as a spouse as their biggest accomplishment and they want you to know that they'll prove to you every day they are worthy to call themselves your spouse. They feel like you have gone through a period of depression and sadness, and they want you to know that they acknowledge it and they see you as strong every day.
The couple I channelled for you guys is Queen Charlotte and King George from Bridgerton.
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PILE 3
First thing I heard 'Sugar Daddy'. This person will spoil you but love you even more. Yes, they may have money and give you gifts but this person truly does love you, care about you and respect you.
They may be older than you that's why people may think that they are your glucose guardian which is not technically wrong and not technically correct either. I feel like that will be a long term joke you two have about them being your sucrose supplier..
They will definitely view you as delicate, I want to say that they are the protective type but not protective to the point of you feeling suffocated by them. They want you to be comfortable and have what you like 'If my spouse wants that watch I'll get it for them'.
They will view you as fun loving, yet you have this air of power to you that they love. Sure, they view you as delicate and they want to protect you, but they also view you as strong and beyond capable of taking care of yourself and those around you basically your spouse is saying 'they want me, but they don't need me'. They know that you can walk away from them anytime and they like that you're always in your power no matter what.
Your spouse admires how you don't need them to feel whole or for financial gain they see you as a breath of fresh air, a change of pace, an adventure.
He may touch you a lot with your consent obviously, like a hand on your waist, shoulder or they may steal little quick kisses. Also, there may be a lot of friendly banter in the relationship.
The couple I channel for you guys is Fallon and Liam from Dynasty.
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mrsbarnesblog · 7 months
Text
I trust you
masterlist ko-fi ao3
Summary: when Bucky comes back from a mission with a knife wound there is only one person who can convince him to get help.
Words count: 3.5k
Warnings: angst and fluff, injury, wounds, low self-esteem, bucky has trust issues and needs a hug, touch starved bucky,
Author’s note: ugh just let me hold my baby and kiss his cute sad face omggg... anyways, idk why I rarely write angsty things, I really wanna do something new, so if you have any ideas let me know! 💘
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It was almost eight o'clock in the evening when FRIDAY reported that the guys' quinjet should arrive at the compound within an hour.
Steve, Sam, and Bucky went on another mission to destroy HYDRA almost two weeks ago. As usual, none of you could get any news from them because they couldn't risk giving away their whereabouts.
It was foolish to assume that you weren't worried about them. Especially for one person. Bucky.
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You and the former Winter Soldier met about six months ago when Steve and Sam first brought him to the tower. Steve was really worried about his old best friend, so before bringing Bucky to the tower, he talked with the team and asked all of you to give Bucky space.
Of course, you knew who he was from the day Steve found out that Bucky was alive. You have seen hundreds of reports and photographs on TV and on the Internet about The Winter Soldier, a ruthless killer who was always invisible but too damn good at his missions. He is the man who was turned into a weapon against his will.
When Steve introduced him, the whole team just nodded and shared awkward smiles, and Bucky himself kept his eyes on the ground. The whole situation was too intense, and no one, not even the funny and sarcastic Tony Stark, knew what to do or say. You actually thought that it might be rude to just stand there and look at him, as if he was a wild animal. Looking at this shy and uncomfortable-looking man before you, you knew that the smallest thing you could get him was to show that he was welcomed in this tower and that everyone was on his side. So, pushing away your own shyness and nerves, you stepped forward, holding out your right hand.
"Hi, my name is Y/N.  It's nice to meet you. I hope you’ll feel comfortable around here." You offered your warmest and most sincere smile, trying not to show nervousness.
Bucky slowly raised his head, genuinely surprised that anyone else had actually spoken to him besides Steve. It's nice to meet you. When had he heard those words for the last time?
Your eyes met, and you could have sworn all the air was out of your lungs. His eyes were even more beautiful than in those rare, high-quality photographs. He looked truly beautiful, with long hair and blue eyes, even though you could see that he was tired—physically and even more emotionally. You stood for what seemed like an eternity, looking at each other's faces, until Bucky got a little nudge from Steve on the arm.
Only then did his gaze move to your still outstretched arm. He hesitated a bit, unsure if he wanted to be touched or feel someone’s warm skin. It’s been too long since another person wanted to touch him without causing any harm. Even Steve gave him minimal physical contact. Always through the gloves or thick jacket, and Bucky didn’t know the true reason for this—whether it was because Steve cared about his feelings or he just didn't want to do that. But then Bucky looked at you again, and he already knew that you would be his death.
You were so beautiful. Probably the most attractive person he has ever seen. It was still morning, and he assumed that you planned to have a day for yourself because you had no makeup, your hair was a little bit messy, and you looked really comfy in a big sweater and a pair of black leggings. Oh, and he definitely noticed your cute, fluffy pink socks. Your eyes were full of friendliness and comfort, so it made him want to trust you. Your lips curled into a warm smile, and he had no doubt that you wanted to make him feel comfortable on the team.
Bucky lifted the corners of his lips slightly, meeting your eyes again, and held out his right hand to you, still feeling awkward. Especially when the whole team around you watches your interaction too closely.
 "Hi."
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When the Quinjet landed on the territory, you couldn't calm your pounding heart. Natasha, who was standing a couple of steps away from you, of course, noticed your condition but didn’t say anything and just sent you a reassuring smile. She knew you'd calm down when Bucky was by your side.
Sam got out first. He looked tired, had a couple of scratches and bruises, but was generally fine.
"Sam!  God, I'm glad you're okay." You said, running closer to him. "How is Bucky? And Steve? Are they okay?" Your worried eyes ran across his face, trying to find answers, but he only pursed his lips and lowered his eyes to the ground.
"Steve’s fine, and Bucky, um... I think you should see it yourself. And I think you need to have a serious talk with this idiot because he doesn't listen to us." Your brows furrowed, but before you could ask anything else, footsteps and stifled moans were heard behind Sam.
It felt like your heart stopped as soon as you saw him. Blood flowed from his temple and lip, and an already darkening bruise adorned his right cheekbone. Your eyes rushed down, trying to find all the damage, and then you saw it. Bucky kept his right hand on his left side. His entire palm was scarlet red as the blood passed through his thick suit and soaked through his fingers. Your mouth opened involuntarily, and your eyes instantly filled with tears.
Of course, this was not his first mission, but he always returned almost without any injuries or with something that quickly healed because of his supersoldier serum. It has never been so bad.
Before you knew it, you were already standing next to him. Tears flowed freely down your face, and you raised your hands up, wanting to touch him, but they froze in the air.
 "Bucky…" You sobbed, looking straight into his eyes.
 "Hello, doll" He smiled reassuringly at you, but you saw how he pressed his teeth together to ease the pain. He didn’t want to scare you.
"Bucky, God, wh-what happened? You need to go to the hospital wing. You’re losing a lot of blood!" You gently took his metal hand, but before you could lead him away, he removed it and moved away a little.
"It's all right, doll.  Nothing that I can't handle on my own. Trust me, I’ve experienced worse."
"Buck, Y/N is right." You notice Steve for the first time because all your attention has been focused on Bucky since he appeared. "That punk cut you pretty deep; it needs to be stitched up."
"You know, I never go to the hospital wing." He purses his lips awkwardly, looking down.
Of course. Of course you knew it. Everyone in the tower knew that the Winter Soldier didn't like being touched or visiting doctors, and he had never asked for any kind of help. He always limited himself to a short handshake or a pat on the back from his best friend.
But you also knew that Bucky couldn't take off his clothes in front of anyone. Too many scars from bullets, knives, and other things that HYDRA used to torture him He confessed this to you one evening when you were sitting in the dark in the common room after his nightmare.
In those six months, you got close enough to him that he trusted you to sit with him in the stillness of the night and share his fears. But he still avoided touching and, of course, did not want to show his body to anyone. Even you. Especially to you.
You were one of the few good things in his life. Someone who genuinely wanted to spend time with him, who wasn’t afraid of him, and who was always kind and supportive. Bucky didn't want to lose you. And he knew that if you ever saw him with those ugly marks all over his body, you would run away without looking back. Because who would like it?
The hand that took hundreds of lives. The hand that was forever connected to his body left a big reminder that he was, in fact, just an experiment that went too well. He often looked at his shoulder in the mirror with anger and despair, wanting to get rid of this mixture of scars and torn skin. Obviously, when HYDRA put that prosthetic on him, they didn't care much about looks or pain, so they just hooked it on the way they did.
"Bucky, please listen to me." You sobbed, moving closer to him again. "I know you're afraid to go there, but please, you have to do it, otherwise, you'll lose too much blood or just get an infection." You hugged yourself with your hands as your body began to tremble with concern for the person in front of you. "It can leave a big scar." You whispered and saw that Bucky’s jaw clenched again. You didn’t want him to think that there was something wrong with having scars, but you knew that it was emotionally too hard for him to deal with them.
"I'm sorry, doll, but I can't," he pursed his lips, shaking his head, "you know I can't do it."
"Bucky…" you whispered as more tears started flooding your face. You were so focused on Bucky that you didn't even pay attention to your friends, who stood aside and pretended not to eavesdrop on your conversation.
"Don't cry because of me, doll, please, you don't have to cry." Bucky's voice lowered to a whisper as he worked up the courage to use his thumb to wipe a tear from your right cheek with a metal finger.
You took advantage of the opportunity, grabbing his metal wrist and pressing his hand closer against your cheek.
 "Please, Bucky. Then let's go to your room. I can help you if you don't want to undress there.
"I don't think it's a good idea either, doll.  You don't need to see it."
"James," you focused on his eyes, rubbing small circles with your thumb into his wrist, "it'll be alright, I promise. I'm not afraid of you. I won’t leave. I'll take care of you. Please do it for me."
You were hurt by his gaze. You've seen a thousand thoughts go through that head. Doubt, fear, uncertainty, and pain. He couldn't lose you. Couldn't lose what you had. Even if he wanted so much more, he was content just being around you. He couldn't lose you to a damn ugly piece of metal attached to him.
But you looked at him like your life depended on it. Tears were still running down your cheeks. You were hurt because of him. But you refused to give up and let his self-doubt win this fight. You continued to gently massage his metal wrist as you placed a light kiss on it. And he could no longer resist you.
"Fine."
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"It's better if we do this in the bathroom," you said as you closed the door to Bucky's room behind you. You quickly walked past him, going into the bathroom and pulling out the first aid kit you knew was in the bottom drawer. You felt comfortable being a little bit bossy here, and Bucky didn’t mind it.
He quietly followed you, watching you with an unsure face. His blood was still soaking through his arm, but that didn't bother him as much as the fact that he'd have to undress in front of you and that at some point you would touch him.
Once all the necessary things were ready, you turned to face Bucky, already preparing to help him out. But as soon as your hands went up to help him unbuckle his suit, he staggered back, and you froze with your hands in the air. For a few seconds, you silently looked into each other's eyes, then you moved, trying to understand his reaction, and what you saw made your heart ache.
His brows were slightly furrowed, and the corners of his lips were turned down. His eyes always told you everything that he tried to hide, and right now they told you how scared and insecure Bucky actually was.
"I don't think I can do it." Bucky whispered softly, casting his eyes down in shame.
"Hey James, look at me," you said, taking his face in your hands. "I'm your friend, you know? I won't hurt you. I won’t judge you. I won't do anything against your will. But I need to help you because I can see how much pain you're in," you sighed, running your fingers over his cheekbones. "I know it's hard. And I know you're scared or shy, but I'm here for you. None of this scares me, and I'll be as gentle with you as I can, okay? You can tell me if it becomes too much, and I'll stop. I promise."  You could see the tears forming in his eyes, and you couldn't help feeling the pain that this beautiful man in front of you had been without care and affection for so long.
Bucky nodded slightly, giving you permission to continue.
"I’ll clean up your wound on the ribs, and then we can take care of your face." You carefully removed your hands from his, now placing them on the clasps of his suit. You opened them one by one, and when you finally got to the last one, you helped Bucky carefully remove that piece of clothing. Next on the way was a stretchy long-sleeve shirt, and by glancing at the wound, you could see that all the tissue around it was completely covered in blood.
"So, now I'm going to carefully lift up the shirt so you can take it off and not bother your wound too much, okay?" you asked, running your eyes over Bucky's face to understand his emotions. He took a deep breath, as if preparing for the worst, but nodded anyway.
You started to slowly lift up his shirt, helping Bucky pull his hands out one by one, and then tossed that no longer needed rag into the bathtub.
"Oh god," you muttered softly, looking at the wound that seemed to be even bigger now.
Bucky thought that you said it about his appearance in general, so he lifted his head up to the ceiling to stop angry tears from falling.
Come on, Buck, we need to sew this up so it doesn't leave a scar. Do you think you can sit on the counter next to the sink?" You looked at Bucky, but you couldn't meet his eyes. You knew that he was at the edge, his body trembled a little bit, but he still listened to you and silently jumped up on the free space near the sink.
"Bucky," you said quietly, trying to be as gentle as you could. "I see you right now, and I’m not going anywhere, you hear me?" You put your hand back on his face, making him meet your eyes. Before you could think, you placed your right hand on his chest, causing his eyes to instantly widen in surprise. His skin was very warm and silky, even though there were a lot of scars from different conditions. You gently moved your hand, showing Bucky that you’re not afraid, that you’re not a threat, and that he can trust you. "You're doing well, it’s okay," you said as you started rubbing soothing circles on his shoulder.
You backed off a little, finally picking up all the necessary things, and began to sanitize and then stitch up the wound. Every time you needed to put your hand on your skin, you felt Bucky instantly tense under your touch, but you tried to send him quiet words of encouragement and praise. Bucky was very quiet, not making a sound even when the needle pierced his skin. His face wasn’t in bad condition, and Super Soldier serum almost healed them, so you decided to only sanitize and clean his skin.
"Well, you did a great job, James. I'm proud of you." About twenty minutes later, you finally tied the bandage and began to put everything back in the drawer, but then felt a touch on your arm.
You looked back at Bucky, only to meet tear-filled eyes.
"No one has ever taken care of me in a long time, Y/N." You stepped closer to Bucky again, unconsciously placing your hands on his shoulders. "I feel ashamed of my body. Of that arm. I didn't want you to see those ugly scars. God, this is so pathetic—"
"Don't say that," you interrupted him. "That's not pathetic. I understand how you feel. That you have so many negative thoughts about yourself. But Bucky… God, I don't know how to properly say it." You paused for a moment, considering the words. "You're one of the most amazing people I know. And even if many people in the tower are scared or intimidated by you, for me, you are the sweetest, most caring, and most generous person. You remember every little thing I say, make me coffee and food when I'm too busy, pretend to like those shitty movies that I make you watch with me. I'm so sorry that so many bad things happened to such a good person that you feel unworthy of good things."
Suddenly, strong arms surrounded you, and you realized that Bucky was hugging you with arms wrapping around your waist. He nuzzled up to your neck, and you could feel light sobs. Gently, you entangled your fingers in his hair, massaging the scalp with calming movements.
"I don't deserve you, doll." Bucky pulled back a little, still keeping his hands on your waist. "I wish I could be normal for you. Be who I was back in the 40s. I would’ve asked you out and given you everything that you deserved. But that person is not here any more, and I'm not worthy of you."
He wanted to ask you out on a date?  Your heart stopped as soon as the words left his mouth, and you stared at Bucky in surprise. "Bucky—"
"I know…fuck—I shouldn't have said that. Fuck, fuck, fuck. I'm sorry, doll. I didn't mean to mess anything up between us, I promise. I know you don't feel the same— it's okay, really. Just forget about—"
You didn't let Bucky finish by leaning forward and brushing your lips against his. His flesh automatically tangled in the hair at the back of your neck as the metal one tightened his grip on your waist. For the first few seconds, Bucky was in shock, not kissing you back, but just as you wanted to pull away, his lips began to move, taking over you immediately.
It was the best kiss you ever had. He was gentle yet so passionate. There were a lot of unsaid feelings that Bucky kept to himself for too long. All thoughts seemed to have left your head as the feeling of him filled your whole body.
When there was not enough air, you moved away from each other, touching your foreheads with your eyes closed.
"Fuck" was the first thing he said.
"Yeah," you laughed, finally meeting Bucky's eyes. He looked at you with such adoration that you felt butterflies in your stomach. You just noticed how much skin-to-skin contact you had. "Are you okay with that? Doesn't that make you uncomfortable?" You tilted your head as your hands squeezed his shoulders.
"That's... that's weird. I'm not used to that kind of contact," Bucky said, studying your face. "But I trust you, doll. You are the only person I trust completely." You felt him begin to gently run his hand along your back. "I'd like to ask you out on a date. I mean, if you want to. If not, I totally understand—"
You interrupted him again, leaving a quick kiss on his lips. "I'd like to go on a date with you, James. You know, you’re so cute when you’re shy?"
You've never seen his face so lit up with happiness, with a little bit of pink on his cheeks. Butterflies began to beat in your stomach again, and you realized that it was you who made him feel that way.
"Do you want to go to bed, put on some shitty comedy, and grab some food? I still have to watch over your injury."
"Sounds like a perfect plan, doll." Bucky kissed you on the forehead, interlacing his fingers with you, and led you to his room.
Even if it still required a lot of work, cuddling with Bucky, you knew it was the best place you could be.
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unluckilyimnot · 3 months
Text
catch your face before you can hide your blush
rayne x reader (mashle)
fluff
m.list
note: me thinking so damn hard about a neutral way to say "she's just a girl" bc yes it's a joke but not inclusif enough and ugh it turns out bad
Feel free to request! Take a look at the rules before :)
I hope you enjoy !
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 It’s not that you don’t like to work with Rayne, it’s the opposite in fact. He always has the right word, a good point to make and it’s easy to explain your point. But if there was one thing you had to point out, it would be how seriously he looks at you when you work. Or when he doesn’t have anything to do, in fact.
Yes, you were sensitive to his charms, but you don’t know if he’s conscious about it at all. Whenever he talks, you have to stay focused on what he’s saying without minding too much his voice, or just even his lips – which are usually dry, you wished you could hand him your lip balm without thinking of the indirect kiss that would create. You’re just a normal teenager, you lose it easily around your crush.
But right now, your real problem was that you were talking and he was listening. Which means that he, it seems like, has to look deeply into your eyes when you make eye contact. Things are, you can’t stay concentrated when he glances at you that way. There’s something so simple yet interesting, he’s drinking all your words as some divine speeches and your brain stops braining. You found yourself mumbling a few words that don't mean anything anymore, you can’t bounce back on you last words because you already forgot them ; and of course you don’t miss the way his eyes fell on your lips for a second before looking back at your eyes.
You can’t help but look away, a burning hot feeling on your cheeks and the second you turned your face away, something cold grabbed your before you could. Your eyes are back into his, getting lost when he doesn’t say anything, simply holding you still.
You’re alone in the library, it’s about to close yet you still have so much to do but it’s like time stopped. He can’t get his eyes off you, nor can you. Cat got your tongue for a few seconds that felt like minutes before you opened her mouth.
“Why do you always look at me like that ?” you whisper, scared that if you speak up you’ll break something.
“Can’t I when you talk to me ?” You’re losing it. Your mouth is dry and keeping the eye contact is killing you. If he looks at your lips one more time you’ll be a goner. Moving his fingers along your jawline instead now, he got a little closer, his nose brushing against yours. “So ?” he insisted, since he didn’t hear your answer but you only nodded at him.
Then his eyes took another peek at your lips, and he’s about to speak again, but you can’t help but lay a small kiss on his lips before he does.
It’s his time to be surprised but not enough to let go when you try to pull away.
“You’re really thinking you’ll get away with that ? Wait ‘til we get to the dorm.” 
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Freaking obsessed with this man as well lately. I'm not done with mashle yet but soon and I'm SO SAD. I loved it so much ❤️‍🩹
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adams-angels · 3 months
Note
I want to see my man in pain, Adam break down after reader said they want to break up (fluff in the end pls) 😞
I reaaaally enjoyed writing this
I love pain 🥹
💖 Please send me requests! Send me your own headcanons! I will draw! I'm obsessed rn!💖
Used
Adam POV
It was a normal night. Out talking to some babes. Tellin' them how great I am. Because, well, I AM! HA! I'm the first fucking man! These bitches swarm me. Who am I to deny them. I check my phone a see y/n has text me. "Ugh, what do you want now you needy fuckin'" I can't believe what I'm reading.
"we're done."
My heart sinks. Why is it sinking. I don't care. I'm fucking ADAM!! Adam stands, pushing away the crowd of angels surrounding him and tries calling you. "Come on.. come on, pick up, you dumb bitch." No answer. NO FUCKING ANSWER. His head spins. Panic sets in as. This isn't happening. Not again.
You think you're better than me?! You're nothing! I'm Adam!! I can get ANYONE I FUCKING WANT YOU THINK I NEED YOU?!
I'VE GOT TONS OF BITCHES WAITING FOR ME!
I DONT NEED YOU I NEVER NEEDED YOU!
He tries calling you again. No answer. "FUCK!" He expands his wings and shoots up, smashing through the skylight. He continues to text and call as he makes his away to your apartment. "FUCKING ANSWER ME!" He screams into his phone. By the time he arrives at your apartment he calms himself down, "I can get them back." He thinks to himself as he lands on your balcony. "They didn't mean it. They couldn't of."
As he reaches for the handle of the sliding door his hand shakes. "No, no, no, no." He grips onto his wrist stepping back from the door, being stopped my the railing. He slides down to the floor. "No, no, no...." His voice cracks, fear, sadness, anger. He never let himself get close. At least that's what he told himself. After the second wife also betrayed him he swore he'd never care so he would never hurt. But somewhere along the way, he fell for you. Although he denied himself.
He rushed to remove his mask, feeling like he can't breathe. Once he got it off he threw it aside. Clutching at his chest as tears escaped from his eyes. "No, no, no.." he whimpered. He sat on the floor for an hour. Thinking about you. What he did wrong. If he did something terrible. Why you're ending it. There wasn't even anything to end and yet his world felt like it was crashing around him.
Once he calmed down he leaned forward and sighed. Wiping his cheeks as he stood up and put his mask back on. He reached for the handle, hesitating before opening the sliding door. He sees you in your bed, asleep. He closed the door quietly and just watched you. For about half an hour before he realised how much a creep he's being. He walked into your livingroom. He's been here plenty times before. He memorized the layout.
He walks over to one of your succulents. You loved them. Once he came over and accidentally knocked one on the floor. You were so upset. He didn't see the big deal but he still went out of his way to buy you a new pot for it and a new succulent altogether. Just something to say he was sorry without actually saying sorry. He smiled as he remembered your joy. He sat on the couch and waited.
A couple hours later he heard rustling in your room. He shot up from the couch and heading to your bedroom, freezing at the doorway as he sees you wake. You scream in surprise, falling off your bed. He noticed your phone falling off the nightstand with you. His chest tightens. Your phone. Those horrible texts. "Adam?! What the hell are you doing in my apartment?!" You yell at him, snapping him out of his thoughts.
He stands there, feeling awkward. "You want to leave me?" He asked, trying hard to not break his voice. You tut, he watches at you stand, wanting to help but to afraid to move. "You say that like you cared." You snap, picking your phone up from the floor. "Don't look at that." He took a step towards you, reaching out but you recoiled. "Why? You next me nasty shit? Telling me I'm worthless? That I was lucky to -" he interrupted, "y/n, I'm sorry. I just want to know what I did wrong."
Adam braces himself. For you to yell. For you to scream. For you to tell him you love someone else. "I just... I can't... I don't want to be a place holder for you." His shoulders slump down he hesitantly steps closer to you "What are you talking about?" He carefully slides his hand under yours "I don't want to be someone you just use until you find someone better." His fingers interlace with your as his other hand brushes your hair from you face. His breath catches seeing your red, watery eyes "I just want to be... I don't know, Adam."
His hand cups your face. He looks into your eyes and for the first time in eons he chose to be vulnerable. "Be mine?" He watches you shrug. Rightfully assuming you've misunderstood his request he clarifies "no, I'm asking. Be mine." The way you look at him makes his chest tighten in fear. "What?" He recoiled. "I mean, maybe we could start again? Like.. properly?"
"You mean like.. date? What happened to "I don't date. I'm the first man. I have the first penis ever bla bla!"" He glares at you. Of course you'd remember that. "I don't sound like that." "You do." Adam brow furrows in in frustration. "Whatever, y/n, please. I can't lose you. I don't want to lose you. Please don't leave me." He felt pathetic. He was pathetic. "I'll have to think about it." His chest tightened. His heart beating a million miles a minute. You'd see how pale he would be if he wasn't wearing the mask. "H-how long will that take?" He asked, desperation leaking out of him.
"I don't know, Adam." You shrug. The air was thick. He was struggling to breath and needed to get out of there. "I really care about you, y/n. You have to believe me, babe." He kisses your hand before releasing it. "Just.. uh... Delete those texts. I didn't mean any of it." He heads to the sliding door he entered from, opening it and expanding his wings as he jumps off. He looks behind to see if you watched leave like you've done so maybe times before. But you're not there.
It's been a month. A whole month. It should feel like nothing to him considering how long he's been in existence yet it feels like a years. He sees you about. With your friends. Getting groceries. Whenever his eyes catch on to you he freezes. No matter what he's doing.
He can't keep this up. He didn't want to pressure you. Make you feel like you had to choose him. But fuck he needed you to choose him. He was in his office. But he couldn't focus. He was so tired, not being able to sleep well without you. Even if he didn't sleep the whole night it was always nice knowing you were there no matter what. At least that's what he used to think.
He checked his phone to see nothing from you. It was too much. He was alone. You were never coming back. No one ever comes back. Lilith left him. Eve left him. Now you. "Fuck. FUCK!" He picks up his coffee and punts it at the wall. He can't stay here. He needs to find you. He needs you back.
He swung the door open and there you were. He couldn't believe it. He thought you'd at least text him. Not show up at his office! His feathers were literally ruffled, his office looks like a bombs hit it. "Y/n?" He said softly, it was like time stopped for a minute. He wish it did. Then he could scoop you in his arms and never let you leave. He snapped back into reality changing his expression quickly, not want anyone to see a softer side to him. "Come in." He stands aside letting you in to his office. He hates that you didn't text. He would of cleaned up there were documents everywhere, a smashed mug on the floor and coffee stains on the wall. He hated it was such a mess for you. "Bad day?" You commented he grumbled in response. "There are no bad days in heaven." He mumbled as he slumps down on his office chair.
Resting his chin on the back of his hand as he watches you walk over to his office window, opening it. The musky smell almost dissipating immediately "So... I thought about it." He perks up, sitting straight, watching you like a hawk. "And?"
"and I'm willing to start again. Properly." He immediately bolts from his chair, wrapping his arms around you. "Fuck, thank fucking Christ. Don't do that to me again. Please." His voice breaks, wings surrounded the both of you. "Please, I'm sorry. I'll treat you so much better." "Promise?" "Yes, promise."
~⁠♡✧⁠。 I really hope you enjoyed! I'm not a writer by any means but I appreciate any support I receive so thank you for reading! 。✧⁠♡~⁠
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