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kass-storycorner · 3 years

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I literally can’t sleep right now because I ate something ✨spicy✨ earlier and I shouldn’t have finished eating it after I noticed it that it was too spicy for my liking 🥲 (and knowing full well that my stomach can’t handle spice at all). But I was hungry and stupid and now I’m laying in bed with stomach ache and feeling sick… so I was inspired to write this (on my phone so the formatting is a bit weird). In those sense I am a Chongyun kinnie I guess. Now excuse me while I try to get a bit of sleep, I have therapy and work tomorrow and I really need a good nights rest for both.

Idea: Thoma invited you over to cook you dinner, but he underestimated how sensitive your stomach is (compared to his own… Thoma would probably eat the dubious meal from Botw without batting an eye)

Characters: Thoma x gn!reader

Genre: fluff

Content warning: mention of feeling sick, mentioning the preparations for vomiting, like getting a bucket etc. (but no actually vomiting takes place, this is the CN for all the other ppl out there like me who can’t deal with the topic very well), very very very slight suggestiv content warning (it’s just one stupid joke of Thoma lol)

Format: i feel like it’s too long to be a drabble but it’s also not proof read so eh also I don’t know how to put something under a cut via the tumblr app so until I’m on a desktop you have to deal with this in the tags I AM SO SORRY

You knew it was a mistake to finish your plate as soon as you ate the first spoon of what Thoma had prepared for you two. But he looked at you with such a bright smile in anticipation of what you would say, how you’d like what he had made specifically for the two of you. It was such a nice gesture for Thoma to cook for you, when he asked you yesterday you accepted his invitation for tonight. The both of you had been dating for a while now, however Thoma didn’t have many nights just for himself as the Housekeeper of the Kamisato Clan. So it was very nice for him to spend his first night off in a while cooking for you. With all of that in mind and his puppy eyes looking at you - ah, you just didn’t have the heart to tell him that it was too spicy for you. It wasn’t even that you didn’t like the taste, you probably would like the dish, but it was just… so spicy, there was no option for a taste. It was just burning in your mouth. With a smile you just kept eating until your plate was empty, hoping the consequences of your actions would be too severe.

And for a while you felt fine, spending the rest of the evening cuddling with Thoma on the couch, listening to how he told you stories about his home with a bittersweet tone. In the middle of one of his stories, he was just telling you about a story from his childhood when he searched with two friends for one of their pet turtles, your stomach interrupted him with a loud growl. “Oh, are you still hungry?”, he asked with a slightly teasing tone. “No, it’s nothing, just digestion”, you tried to laugh it off and for a while he kept continuing his stories, not paying too much attention to the different noises of your stomach. That was until he noticed how your body started to tense up, your face turning pale. “Hey, are you alright?”, Thoma shifted, having you sit beside him now. “Yeah, it’s nothing, I’m fin-“, but before you could even finish the sentence the pain in your stomach became worse, as if someone just punched you in it you jolted towards, hugging your arms around your stomach. Hunched over in pain you could feel Thoma’s hand on your back. “Do you need to vomit? Wait a moment”, before you could even answer his question he was already on his feet, running towards the small kitchen and getting you a bucket. Just as quick as he was on his feet he sat back beside you, his hand back on your back, the bucket placed in front of you. “Thoma, really I’m fine it’s ju-“, again you were interrupted by the pain, having to take a deep breath to manage the cramp. “You don’t seem fine to me,” his voice was filled with worry while he caressed your back. “It fine, really. I’m used to it, I just need to lay down a bit,” You we’re finally able to say, giving him a pained smile. This really wasn’t ideal and to be honest it was so embarrassing for you. Maybe, you thought to yourself, that’s the punishment for not being honest from the beginning. But you couldn’t turn back time, so this was now your evening. “Okay, hold on,” before you could even understand what he mean with that he stood up and picked you up, carrying you bridal style to his bedroom. “Thoma, what are you doing?”, surprised by the sudden action you cling to his jacket. “You said you needed to lay down,” he put you down on his bed, “it’s best for you to lay down here, the couch really isn’t the most comfortable when you need rest.” Any other night you would feel something different in your stomach, nervousness, excitement- whatever, the way he carried you into his bedroom, put you down on his bet… you really wished that the circumstances were different for his actions. Was he even aware of what he was doing? “Thoma, I’m sorry”, you sigh, hiding your face in your hands. God, all of this was so embarrassing. He sat down at the end of the bed, his hand on your leg. “Hey, don’t be, it’s not your fault that you don’t feel well.” Thoma stood up from the bed, throwing a blanked over you to then make his way out of the room. “Don’t go”, you mumbled before he was at the bedroom door. “Mmh? What did you say?”, he asked and came closer to you again. You grabbed the fabric of his clothes, repeating yourself. “Don’t go, please.”

The pain in your stomach was still bad, but worse was the thought of having to spend the night alone in Thoma’s bed and him willingly sleeping on his couch, because you couldn’t tell him the truth. Without any further words Thoma filled the empty space next to you in his bed, laying on his side, his one hand supporting his head and the other hand softly going through your hair. You had your eyes closed, concentrating on your breathing, to regulate the pain but also to calm yourself down from the whole situation. Laying next to him in his bed, so close and it all felt so intimate… ah, maybe the nervousness of the whole situation didn’t really help with the pain. After a while you felt Thoma’s hand press against your forehead. “Mmmh, they don’t seem to have a fever, that’s good”, he mumbled to himself. Ah, did he think you fell asleep? Awkwardly you cleared your throat, opening your eyes looking directly into his. “Oh-ah, you’re still awake?”, he looked a bit embarrassed at you noticing how he talked to himself out loud. “Umm- yeah. Thoma,” you shifted, now laying on your side and not on the back anymore, facing him. “Don’t worry, I’m really not ill, it’s just…”, you paused, hesitant to tell him this, “it’s just, the dish you made earlier was a bit … too spicy for me, I quite the sensitive stomach and… I just didn’t want to tell you earlier, you made such an effort to cook for me and-“, you didn’t knew what else was there to stay, burying your face again in your hands you mumbled out another apology to him. “I’m sorry that I didn’t notice it, I made you eat two plates of it, without seeing that you didn’t even enjoy it”, Thoma pulled you in a hug, his chin now resting on your head. “No, Thoma don’t apologise. You couldn’t have known it, I promise you I’ll tell you in future…”. Suddenly you felt another wave of stomach pain, making you curl up again in pain. “Ah, it’s so stupid that my body reacts to a bit of spice like that,” you try to joke, but Thoma only caresses your cheek, looking at you with worry. “How bad is it?”, he asks, wishing he could be of any kind of help to you. “I’m just in pain, so it’s not that bad”, you say hoping he won’t press further on the matter. You really weren’t in the mood to explain to him what exactly it could entail when you ate things that upset your stomach - especially spicy food. “Can I help?”, his hand again at your back, slowly going up and down. “Do… do you have a heating pad or something similar? Sometimes it helps when I put some heat on my stomach.” “No, I don’t have one put… wait, I have a better idea.” With that he made you turn your back to him, pressed to his stomach with it. “T-Thoma?”, you asked nervously when you felt his hand under your shirt on top of your stomach. “Don’t worry, just trust me I won’t do anything funny,” he replied. “Unless you want me to”, he added, which earned him a small nudge with your elbow in his side. “Ouch, okay got it, not the time and place”, Thoma chuckled and then you suddenly felt the heat on your stomach. You sigh at the feeling, visibly relaxing now. You two just stayed there for a while until you were the first one to fall asleep in his arms, Thoma following shortly after you. Neither of you did expect to spend your first night together like this, but you weren’t complaining.

#it’s 3am #and I’m still in pain #FML #pls body just let me pass out after I post this thanks #genshin #genshin impact #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact fluff #fluff #genshin fan fiction #genshin fan fic #fan fiction #Thoma #tohma #tohma x reader #Thoma x Reader #I did not expect to write anything but hey you just need to be in pain and not able to sleep #inazuma

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lloydskywalkers · 3 years

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Hey i love your fics, even though they make me cry heh and i wanted to ask do you have a masterlist or would you ever make one for your fics on tumblr? if not thats totally cool, i was just wondering, have a great day!

ahhHH thank you so much!! <3 all my fics on tumblr are under the “my fic” tag, but I’ve been meaning to make a masterlist for ages so I guess this is the day, thank u for finally giving me the push to do this :’D

FIC MASTERLIST

Mult-Chapter Fics (FFN only)

Raising Hell

(my baby I’ll be writing for the rest of my life, essentially a massive fic covering Kai, Nya and Lloyd’s relationship throughout the seasons)

All I’m Asking For

(team-centric holidays-fic au following the aftermath of an Oni battle)

Down Comes the Night

(s9 au where Lloyd, Morro and Harumi have to work together that maN I need to update)

Those Left Behind

(post-s8 fic following Lloyd and Nya coping with the guys’ “deaths”, written before s9 premiered)

One Shots (tumblr)

(below the cut because there are. a lot.)

Skywalker Syndrome pt. I

Skywalker Syndrome pt. II

Skywalker Syndrome pt. III

(Lloyd loses an arm and a whole lot of aftermath, circa s8/9)

any port in a storm

(Pixal and Lloyd and the evolving nature of friendship, as highlighted by the regular burning down of your city. Lloyd and Pixal bonding throughout s8/9)

Heirloom

(snapshots of Lloyd and his relationship with titles)

planetary go

(Lloyd attends Rachel ((oc)) and Brad’s field trip, and things blow up)

Wishful Thinking

(post s10 Lloyd and Garmadon angst)

Wishful Thinking part 2

(considerably less angsty oneshot where Garmadon attempts to understand Lloyd, in disguise)

the idiot’s guide to not despising your cousin

(au where Lloyd and Morro get to be cousins that’s so long it will crash your browser)

call the police and the fireman (alternative warning: fire hazard)

(Lloyd learns to breathe fire, and it goes as well as you’d expect)

There’s Insurance for That

(Five places the ninja are no longer allowed into, featuring Skylor)

a complicated profession

(mandalorian au with Kai and Nya as Mandalorians)

slipping

(Lloyd goes oni mode real quick and handles it Not So Well)

Sleepsong

(sad s5 aftermath, featuring Lloyd and Cole)

what stays and what fades away

(post s11 aftermath, with a focus on zangst)

and it is a shame

(s11 ice emperor speculation, featuring Lloyd, Akita and Zane)

in which the monastery almost burns down again

(the ninja try to throw Lloyd a surprise birthday party)

flicker

(Kai-centric fic dealing with his relationship with fire over seasons)

turned to smoke

(s1 Lloyd and Garmadon versus s8 Lloyd and Garmadon angst)

exposure therapy

(pre-s8, Lloyd tries living alone)

close for comfort

(Kai has nightmares after Chen’s staff in s4)

Kai possessed by Morro rambling

(not really a fic, but also sort of?? close enough)

hyacinth (in yellow)

(post-s7 Lloyd and Cole-centric angst, focusing on lost parents)

Fic for art where Kai takes a hit for Lloyd

(it’s. also angst.)

n stands for neutral

(Kai teaches Lloyd how to drive. Sort of.)

aftermaths

(post s10 Kai and Lloyd talking)

déjà vu

(Lloyd and Nya after Cole falls in s10)

two a.m. tea

(Pixal, Nya and Lloyd bonding over cheap tea, pre-s7 through s9)

snip, snip

(Kai gives kid Lloyd a new hairstyle)

it’s me (version 2.0)

(Show Lloyd and Movie Lloyd have a bad day thanks to dimension-jumping oni)

terrorize y’all’s neighborhood

(fluffy team halloween fic with kid Lloyd)

juxtaposition

(Lloyd and Garmadon, as seen in contrasting snapshots through seasons)

Survivor Ninja!

(post s2, the ninja get stranded at sea for the day — crack)

fears

(s2 bad end au, the single worst fic I’ve ever written, everyone dies and no one is happy)

heartbreak

(Wu-centric angst over Lloyd and Garmadon’s similarities)

nightmares

(Cole’s nightmares as a ghost are particularly dangerous)

lost on you (alt. ouroboros)

(Morro, Harumi, and Lloyd on loss and the color green)

ninjago incredibles au

(exactly what it says on the tin, incredibles 2-era inspired)

on gifts

(Edna and Jay growing up)

could have-beens

(harumi dies?? written during s9 not sure what this one is actually but it’s angst)

weathering

(post-s5, Kai finds Lloyd watching storms)

like a bad soap opera

(mid-s8 episode aftermath of harumi’s betrayal)

some other person’s destiny

(Lloyd and Harumi on the river mid-s8, I cannot believe this was the first fic I wrote for ninjago)

Kai runs into the son of Lord Garmadon for the first time (movie-verse)

Kai and Lloyd prank Chen, featuring grumpy cousin Morro (movie-verse)

Kai and Nya on leaving Lloyd behind in s5

The show ninja watch their movie

Grave Danger snippet with Lloyd in the river whooo

That ATLA au where Harumi’s a bloodbender

S5 snippet with Lloyd and Ronin vibing over possession

S9 au angst where Lloyd and Nya never found out the guys were alive

Halloween Jay and Lloyd fic Tumblr ate like three times

Angsty Jay and Cliff Gordon oneshot

Lloyd gets his ear pierced by Kai

#answered #masterlist #this took sO long hdnjkfg #i didnt realize how many i had lying around #glances at wips #weeps #Anonymous

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marvelgurl · 3 years

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Off-Limits: Part 9

Characters: Tom Holland X Reader Osterfield, Harrison Osterfield, Holland boys (mentioned), Dr. Riley Cotter (OC)

Word Count: 4780

Warnings: Fluff, Angst, Therapy, Mild Anxiety/ Panic Attack

A/n: Sorry there was no update on this series last week, Life decided to be a bitch and get in the way.

Tumblr Masterlist Series Masterlist

As always Feedback is more than welcome. The Good and The Bad. I really helps me.

Want to be tagged in my upcoming work? Let me know Here

You don’t know how long you were standing in the middle of this giant hug but when it was over, it seemed like it was too soon. After everything that has happened the last couple months, there was this sense of peace that finally came over you. Now you were going to work hard to keep it like this. You know it’s going to be an up-hill battle, but you know that you have an amazing support system behind you.

“Hey, what are you thinking about?” Tom’s voice brought you out of your thought.

“Just how lucky I am to have all of you. I’m starting to realize that I can’t do this on my own. I have built up so many walls around myself that I need to learn to break them down to let the people that I care about most back in.” You looked down at your feet, you didn’t want to see the reactions on their faces.

“We are all here for you Y/n. No matter what, we will help you in any way that we can.” He pulled you into him and kissed the side of your head.

Not being able to trust your voice, you just smiled. You leaned into Tom resting your head on his shoulder. It was getting late, and you guys have had a long day. Harrison could see that you were tired.

“Y/n I think it’s time to go. You look like you are about to pass out right here.” He let out a small chuckle.

“Okay.” you let out a yawn. “Goodnight guys.”

“Goodnight Y/n.” The boys said in unison.

“Goodnight Darling.” Tom gave you one last hug before letting you go with Harrison.

“Goodnight Tom.” You walked to the car with Harrison. Tom didn’t go back inside until your car was out of sight.

You started falling asleep on the drive back to your flat. After Harrison parked the car, he came around to get you out. You stopped him from trying to pick you up, you got out of the car and wrapped an arm around him for support. Once you had gotten into your flat you let go of him and turned to him.

“I have a surprise for you.” You gave him a sleepy smile.

“I’m sure it can wait until morning Y/n.” he chuckled.

“No, it can’t. Follow me.”

You turned and pointed down the hall. You dramatically walked like Gollum towards the spare room. This caused Harrison to double over in a laughing fit, but that also didn’t stop him from pulling out his phone to record you. You were currently using the spare room as an office, but you wanted Harrison to feel more at home. You also didn’t want him to have to sleep on the couch anymore while he is here. Once outside the door, you were still in a crouching stance. You reached up to the doorknob before looking up to him with a scrunched-up face.

“Are you ready Harrison?” You said in your best Gollum voice.

“Absolutely not, but I am loving this.” He gestured to all of you. “For someone who was dead tired less than a minute ago, you sure have a burst of energy.”

“Well, I am just excited.” You stood up and started talking normally. “I just wanted to do a little something for you. You have done so much for me, that I want to return the favor.”

“You didn’t have to do anything for me. You’re my sister I would do anything for you.”

“Exactly! I’m your sister and I would do anything for you too.” You moved back to the door and opened it. “Come on, go in.” You gestured for him to walk in.

Harrison hesitantly walked around you into the room. You had gotten him the full set up, a queen size bed, nightstands, dresser and a television. Even after he wasn’t staying with you anymore you would have a full guest room/ office.

“Oh my…” Harrison was speechless. “When did you…? How did you…?” He was walking around the room in awe.

“Well, it wasn’t easy I can tell you that much.” You said as you slightly sat on your desk. “I had to do it over a few days. Do you remember when you had to leave to help Tom with movie stuff for a few days?”

“Yeah, you did this when I left you?”

“I didn’t do most of it.” You lifted up your hand, it was almost fully healed now. “I had a lot of help, I did more of the decorating part. So, I hope you like it.”

“Like it? I love it.” He came over and hugged you. “I may never go back to mum’s.”

“Woah let’s not get too caried away here. As much as I love you, that’s going to be a firm no.”

“Oh, come on, you don’t want to live with your favorite brother?”

“Haz you are my only brother.”

“Then by default your favorite.” He had a big grin on his face.

“I am so not awake enough for this anymore.” You gave him a pat on the shoulder before heading towards the door. “Goodnight Haz.”

“Thank you for this Y/n. Goodnight.” You walked to your room for some much-needed sleep.

The next morning, you were up earlier than Harrison, so you decided to make breakfast for the both of you. You grabbed two plates and mugs, setting them on the island for when you were ready for them. You made a quick breakfast of bacon, eggs and hash browns before starting on making the tea. When you were almost done Harrison came out of his room, his hair was all over the place. You couldn’t help but smile.

“Wow… You look amazing.” You were trying to hold in your laughter.

“Well thank you.” He attempted to fix his hair but only made it worse. “That bed is amazing. It’s better than the one I have at home.”

“Well, I’m glad you like it.”

You put food onto the plates for the two of you. Then you handed him his cup of tea. You both sat down to eat. Harrison could tell there was something on your mind, just by the look on your face he knew.

“What do you have planned for today?”

“Umm… I was able to find a therapist. I figured that it’s time that I try to deal with things like an adult.” You were just pushing your food around at this point. You ate a fair amount but all of a sudden you weren’t hungry. “I umm... was wondering if you could maybe…”

“Go with you?” You didn’t look at him, just nodded. “Yes, I will go with you.”

“Really?” You finally looked over to him, with a shocked look in your face.

“Don’t act so surprised.” He gently pushed your arm. “I would do anything for you. You know that, right?

You had decided that you should take the doctor’s advice and go to see a therapist. In all honesty you didn’t think it was going to help. You were going to give it a chance though. You had found one close enough to your flat that you could walk to, his name is Dr. Riley Cotter. Today was your first meeting with him, and you were nervous. You had initially asked Harrison to come with you instead of Tom because there are things in your past that you just needed to keep quiet, and right now you were kind of wishing you hadn’t asked Harrison to come.

You and Harrison were standing outside of his office. Your appointment was in a few minutes, but you couldn’t bring yourself to go inside.

“Are you okay?” Harrison noticed you shaking.

“I… I don’t know if I can do this.” You started rubbing your hands together, in an attempt to try and steady them.

“How about we sit here until you’re supposed to go in, then if you don’t think you can, we will go back home. Okay?”

“Yeah, let’s do that.”

The both of you sat down on a bench outside, Harrison wrapped his arm around you and pulled you close to him. You sat there for a few minutes before you heard the door to the building open. You looked up to see a man standing in the doorway. He looked over to you and Harrison with a smile.

“I’m guessing putting a bench in was a smart idea.”

“Yeah, sorry I just needed a few minutes to calm my nerves.” You said as you stood up, pulling on the sleeves of your jumper.

“That is completely fine. Take your time. I’m here when you’re ready.” He gave you a reassuring smile.

“I think I’m ready.” You looked to Harrison who stood up.

“Y/n.” You looked back up to the man. “For the first couple of sessions, I don’t allow my clients to bring other people in. I just want you to be able to talk freely. I want you to feel like you can say certain things and you can’t do that with someone else here.”

“Oh… Okay.”

Harrison gave you a look as to ask if you were okay. You just nodded your head and walked to the door where Dr. Cotter was standing. Once inside, the building had an open concept. It was wide open; it didn’t feel like what you thought a therapist’s office would feel or look like. It looked as if you were just walking into someone’s home. You were looking around for a while, just scoping out the place.

“Y/n?”

You looked over to where Dr. Cotter is standing. There were a few different places to sit. Over to the left side there was a large couch with a few matching chairs around a coffee table. Off to the right by a large window was a table with a couple of chairs.

“This doesn’t feel like a therapists office.” You gestured to your surroundings.

“I know. I wanted to make my office different. I get a lot of clients in here that absolutely hated the whole stereotypical, leather couch and single chair with a wall of books behind it. I do still have that, but I want my clients to feel like this is a safe place for them to come in and be themselves. I want them to be able to talk freely, and the environment plays a role in that. That’s why I have different areas. So, any place in particular you want to sit?” He stood there explaining with his hands behind his back but gestured with one hand when asking you were to sit.

“I guess the couch is fine.” No matter where you sat down, you were still going to be nervous.

“Okay, just let me grab a few things and we will get started. Would you like some tea or water?”

“Tea please.”

He walked over to a small kitchenette, putting a kettle on to boil. He grabbed out three cups, one of which was a to go cup. You were confused for a minute. He made the tea in the disposable cup first and walked outside, you guessed he gave it to Harrison. That made you smile; he was out there for a little while. Once he came back inside, he went into another room, coming back he had a couple of things in his hands. He came over to you and handed you a notebook, he set down his notepad and pen before going to get the tea.

“Thank you.” He handed you your tea and sat down in one of the chairs.

“You’re welcome.” He gave you a smile, then picked up his notepad. “So, let’s get started, shall we? I’m not going to pressure you into telling me anything. Like I said earlier this is supposed to be a safe space for you. When you are ready you can tell me as much or as little as you want. I will be writing down notes, one of the few things that will never change when it comes to therapy.”

“Okay. I… I don’t know where to start.” Once again you started shaking, you wrapped your arms around yourself to try and calm down.

“Let me just say this. You can quickly lose yourself because you’re silent about things. Everyone thinks that their world is crumbling around them, but when you talk to someone about what you’re going through that’s when you realize that you are not alone in this.”

“Well, if that’s the case. I lost myself a long time ago.” You took in a deep breath, before letting it all out. It was time to start getting things off of your chest. “I guess that happened when I thought that jumping into a relationship was the best thing I could do. Boy, was I wrong.” You let out a small chuckle.

“Why do you say that?” His brows furrowed together, in a curious fashion and not a critical way.

“Well, back then I was trying to run from my own feelings. I have been in love with a guy that I have known forever. I didn’t want to face my feelings for him. I ended up trying to get over him by dating the wrong guy. All though I didn’t know that at the time. He was so sweet to me in the beginning, I was an idiot to think that it was real. It was one of those too good to be true situations. I knew it was, but I stayed with him. After about a year, it was like a switch flipped in his brain. I didn’t know what I did but shit hit the fan.”

You needed to take a breath before you could keep talking about this. When you told Harrison and Tom “everything” it wasn’t exactly everything. You didn’t really want to face this right now. You just wanted to get up and leave. You may have also looked towards the windows and door for an escape. Dr. Cotter could see it too.

“Y/n, you don’t have to keep going. I can see the gears turning in your head. I can see that this is making you uncomfortable to the point that you are about to bolt out the door.” He leaned closer to you to look you directly in the eyes. “Therapy isn’t a sprint that you have to get done in one day. It is going to take you a long time to deal with any issue. Even the ones you think are small, they can bring up so many emotions for you. Let me ask you this. Have you tried explaining any of this to anyone that you are close too?”

“I did, but I didn’t tell them everything. Faking a smile is so much easier than explaining why I’m sad and broken.” You looked down at your hands before moving onto something else. “Nobody knows how depressed I truly am. Or how alone I really feel. It’s so hard being your own best friend when you secretly hate yourself more and more as the time passes.” Tears had formed in your eyes; you were trying to hold them back.

“Why do you think you are broken?”

“I don’t know how to explain the reason I feel this way, I just do. I know I have so many issues and problems that I have to deal with. My brain is so messed up from the shit I have gone through. I can tell you right now that I don’t think that you can help me, I feel like I’m too far gone.” You got up and started pacing. You raked your fingers through your hair. “I just hate feeling like this, I hate that I have put myself in a position where I can say or do one wrong thing and I’m on my own. I know that the people in my life say they will be there for me no matter what, but I have a hard time believing them.”

“No one is too far gone. We just have to help you to learn see that.” He just looked up at you for a second, just searching your eyes. “Not everyone in your life is going to leave you Y/n. You have to know that.”

“How am I supposed to believe that? If I were them, I would have left me a long time ago, and not turned back. The thing is I just need one person, to never give up on me. Just one.” You stopped to look at him, holding up one finger. “With the way I was going and still kind of am going, it’s only a matter of time before they see it too.”

“I can tell you that your brother Harrison.” He pointed towards the door. “He’s not going to leave you; he’s not going to give up on you. I know I only talked to him for a short amount of time, but he cares about you so much.”

You sat back down, putting your head into your hand. You were still trying to fight back the tears but so far you were fighting a losing battle.

“Here.” You looked up to see him holding a tissue out for you. “I think that you have done enough for today. Honestly, I didn’t think that you were going to tell me anything. Well not for a few sessions anyway.”

“I just need to start letting things out. I can’t keep them bottled up anymore.”

He picked up the notebook that he had handed to you earlier. “Here’s a good place to start then.”

“What is this for?” You took the notebook from him.

“That is for you. I would like you to write at least one thing a day. It could be a page, a paragraph, a sentence, a word, you could even draw a picture if you want. I just want you to do something. Most people don’t like expressing their feeling to others in the fear of getting hurt. You don’t have to show it to me if you don’t want to, but I would like you to at least try.”

“I will, and I’m sorry I was all over the place. It all kind of came out so fast.”

“Don’t apologize, I was able to keep up with you. I can tell that there is a lot of things that you need to get out, you just don’t know how. That’s why I am here to help you, and that’s another reason I give people these notebooks.”

You just smiled at him. Then the both of you just walked to the door. When you walked out Harrison was on the phone, but as soon as he saw you, he hung up.

“Hey, is everything okay?” He saw the redness in your eyes, and instantly pulled you into a hug.

“Yeah, I’m okay.”

He pulled back slightly, looking at you. You brought your hand up to wipe the few tears that had fallen out when Harrison hugged you. He took one hand off of you and waved to the Doctor, you did the same. As you walked back home, the both of you held onto the other. You needed this sense of comfort right now.

You walked in silence; you didn’t want to talk after that. You could tell Harrison had something on his mind though. Just by the way he kept looking at you. Once you finally got inside your flat you asked him about it.

“Harrison?” You leaned with your hands braced on the back of the couch.

“Yeah.” He looked over too you.

“What’s wrong?”

“What are you talking about?”

“Haz, I have known you your entire life, I know all your little quirks. So, what’s going on?” You crossed your arms and just looked at him.

“While you were in with your therapist, I got a call from Tom.” He was avoiding eye contact, so it wasn’t a simple phone call.

“And?”

“He has to go to New York for a week or so to do reshoots, and he was wondering if I could go. He also doesn’t want to leave you alone. I don’t want to leave you here either.”

“Haz I will be fine without you for a week or even two. I think its time for me to start taking charge of my life again. I am doing better. Go with him to New York, I will be fine.” You gave him a smile, a fake smile but a smile none the less.

“Are you sure? I can tell him you’re not ready.” You quickly cut him off.

“Harrison, if you don’t go, I will personally kick your ass all the way to New York myself.” You pulled out your phone and dialed Tom’s number.

“What are you doing?” You held up a finger to Harrison and mouthed “I’m on the phone” before turning away.

“Hello Darling.”

“Hello Thomas.”

“Oh no, what did I do?” You could hear a hint of fear in his voice.

“You haven’t done anything, but what you are going to do is make sure Harrison gets on the plane to New York with you.”

There was a moment of silence between the two of you, while you waited for his response.

“Are you sure love? I can ask Harry or Sam to come with me.”

“I’m fine, plus this week will be my first week back to work. So, I won’t even be here ninety percent of the time. I don’t need a babysitter; I have gotten better. if you feel so inclined to have someone here with me, you could always bring me Tessa.” You had a real smile on your face now. You absolutely Love her.

“Alright. I will let Tessa watch over you.” You let out a squeal and did a small happy dance. “You have to promise me that you will let me know if something happens, or if you need me or Harrison to come back.”

“I promise but like I said I will be fine. I talk about Tessa all the time, everyone at the studio wants to meet her. Which means she won’t be stuck here; she will be with me all day. Plus having Tessa with me will make my week a lot brighter.”

“I know, you love her. I think she loves you more than she loves me though…” He paused for a few seconds. “Maybe its not a good idea for her to spend a week with you…”

“Thomas Stanley Holland! Don’t you dare!”

“I have no idea what you’re implying.”

“Don’t you dare dangle Tessa cuddles in front of me just to take them away.”

“I would never do that to you.”

“Umhm. When do you guys leave?”

“Tomorrow morning.”

“Oh wow, that’s so soon. Maybe you guys should just come over and stay the night here and I can take you to the airport tomorrow.”

“That sounds like a good idea. I will be over there later. I still need to pack for myself and for Tessa.”

“Okay, I will see you later.”

“See you later Darling.”

You hang up the call. You look to Harrison with a smile on your face.

“Go pack for your trip Haz.”

“Yeah yeah.” He just waved you off as he walked to his room to pack.

A few hours later, Harrison is on the couch watching tv, while you are in the kitchen making dinner. You were making a quick caprese chicken in pasta, I was one of the many meals you learned while you were in the states. One of your friends was obsessed with food and cooking, so you asked him to show you some good recipes, which he gladly did. You had pulled out three plates just in case Tom hasn’t eaten by the time he gets there. You were just about done when you heard the knock on the door.

“Harrison, will you get the door please?”

“On it.” He got up quickly and went to the door.

The next thing you hear was the little nail taps on your hardwood floors. You knew it was Tessa. Which means any second you would hear Tom next.

“Hello Love.” He said as he came up behind you and wrapped his arms around your waist.

“Well hello to you too.” You were trying to focus on finishing dinner, but Tom wouldn’t let go. “Tooom, I need you to let go. I’m trying to get this done.”

“No.” You could hear the pout in his voice. “I’m not going to be able to do this for a week, I have to do it as much as I can.”

You turned around in his arms. “I promise if you let go, I will let you be as clingy as you want. I’m almost done.”

“Ugh… Fine.” He let go of you.

You turned back a round to finish. You moved the pan off the stove and started plating the food. Tom came in to help you take the plates to the table. You grabbed two beers and a bottled water, taking them to the table. You gave the boys the beers and kept the water. You were really trying to not drink as much. So far you have been successful.

After dinner you guys decided to watch a movie. You were slightly sitting/laying in the corner with your legs up on the couch, but as promised Tom was laying down with you. His head was on your chest, his arms wrapped around you. You were playing with his hair, making him slowly start to fall asleep. Harrison was sitting on the love seat with Tessa cuddled up next to him. You couldn’t help but smile, everything was perfect.

Once the movie was over Harrison got up to go to bed. You both said goodnight, Tessa came over to you, putting her face on the couch and looked up at you. You knew it was time for her to have a potty break, but when you tried to get up Tom’s grip tightened.

“Tom, I need to get up.”

“No. Too comfortable.” He mumbled.

“Tessa needs to go out, then we can go to bed.”

“Okay.” He laid there for a few more seconds before getting up. He looks so tired.

“Tom, go lay down. I can take her out really quick.”

“Are you sure? I can come.” His eyes were still closed, while he was talking to you.

“I’m sure. Go to bed, I will be there soon.” You gave him a quick peck on the cheek before taking Tessa out.

When you came back in, you made sure Tessa had plenty of food and water out. Then the two of you made your way to your room, leaving the door open enough for her to come and go. You looked over to see that Tom had already passed out.

You looked to your desk to see the notebook for Dr. Cotter. You walked over and finally sat down to write in it, but you didn’t know what to write. You just sat there for a while staring at the blank page. When your pen finally moved, it was like as if someone else was controlling it.

I don’t know what to write in here. I know I should write my feelings but the feelings I am having right now, I know they are temporary.

I am happy that I have my brother, my boyfriend and my Tessa here. Tomorrow will be here soon to ruin it. Harrison and Tom will leave for New York. I will still have Tess, but I just feel like something is going to happen. I don’t know what it is, but I just have this pit in my stomach.

That’s just my life at this point though. The feeling of something is going to happen, just not knowing when. It’s one of the worst feelings in the world, but I don’t know how to stop it. That scares me so much.

You got up closing the notebook and turning to your bed. Tessa had already made herself at home on it, walking over you gave her a few head scratches. You got in and moved close to Tom, you gave him a kiss on the forehead. His arms instantly tried to find your waist, pulling you as close as he possibly could, eventually you were laying on his chest. You don’t know how long it took you to fall asleep, but the sound of Tom’s heartbeat was lulling you to sleep.

Series Tags: Open

@aidinniram, @houseofflufff, @justafangirlduh @thevelvetseries @bella03riv @call1800coochie @shrutipatel08 @adriannauni

@sarahjoestewy-blog @thenoddingbunny-blog @just-levyy @bornforfangirling

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orbitariums · 4 years

Text

𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐟𝐢𝐥𝐦 | 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 | 𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐯𝐞 𝐫𝐨𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐬 (𝟐)

part one

hi everyone, thank you sososososooooo much for all the outreach, i really appreciate it!!! i may be making a second taglist, so look out for that if you didn’t get a chance to be added to the first one (tumblr has a tag limit but there r ways to work around it, that’s why i had a limit as well!!)

thank u for reading!! stay safe <3

taglist is closed!

playlist

word count: 7.3k

warnings: age gap, sex work, smut, dirty talk

𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐟𝐢𝐥𝐦 | 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐭𝐰𝐨: 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 | 𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐯𝐞 𝐫𝐨𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐬

Steve had never slept so well. He woke up that morning feeling like a brand new person. Rather than obsess over the meticulous, filthy details of the chat, which he knew would make him squirm now that he wasn't in the moment, he recalled the pleasure he felt and the relief he felt when he had finished. He thought about the connection he had made with you, how much he wanted to talk to you again, wanted to try another private session.

But of course he thought about the sexual aspect of it. How could he not? He had cyber sex with a stranger, a stranger who made him come twice in the span of half an hour. A stranger who he was incredibly attracted to, both physically and personality wise. He found it hard to grasp that you were so comfortable revealing yourself in such an intimate way to strangers online, especially the way you had last night.

And he admired it, even though it was so new to him. Because surprisingly, although he was the Captain America, quite literally the face of America, he could never be as bold as you -- sure, he had shared himself with you, but he was in his comfort zone and this was new to him.

You on the other hand, shared yourself with thousands of strangers every night. Morally, he wanted to question it - he grew up in a very conservative time period. But he couldn't, because he had taken part in it and he had so much respect for what you did... it took courage. He understood the whole female liberation thing and the fact that you were taking control of your own body. So, he loved this for you, and for everyone else who did this kind of work.

So the morning after that rare night, he found himself thinking only of you. In the shower, while he ran his fingers through his hair and closed his eyes, he got flashbacks to the way your robe opened as you slowly revealed your body. He felt himself get hard again, though this time he could find temporary release with just his hands, pumping himself to quick and easy release in the heat of his hot shower, throwing his head back and picturing your lips replacing his hands as he shut his eyes.

At briefings that morning, everyone noticed Steve's change in spirit. He was less antsy, less to himself. He even smiled a few times, even looked better, like he had actually slept. It was like a few months worth of stress and an urge for intimacy had been lifted off his shoulders.

"You look great Steve. Did you take my advice?" Tony asked after the briefing was over.

By the look on Tony's face, he already knew the answer to that question. Of course he hadn't heard Steve, the walls were soundproof (and for good reason, because if they weren't, he probably would've disturbed the whole tower), but he could sense it in how different he was acting.

"What advice?" Natasha looked over her shoulder, curious to know.

"Oh nothing, just guy stuff," Tony flipped his hand dismissively, and Natasha raised her brows,

"Do I even wanna know?"

Before Steve could answer, his cheeks getting red at the idea of getting found out, Tony replied with quickness,

"Last time I checked, I was just talking to Steve."

"Carry on with your very important, top secret conversation," Natasha joked, narrowing her eyes curiously at Steve and Tony before leaving the room.

"So. How was it?" Tony grinned, leaning in excitedly as he propped his legs up on the table.

Steve went silent for a few moments, a serious look on his face before he broke out into a relaxed grin,

"Honestly? It was amazing."

Tony slammed his hand down on the table in victory, a big grin taking over his features,

"Yes! That's what I'm talking about! I was hoping you'd enjoy it. I thought you might be a little prudish about it."

Steve ignored the offhand comment and just chose to focus on the positive, nodding slowly and folding his arms over his chest,

"I gotta thank you Stark. It definitely wasn't something I'd expect to be my thing, but I guess you learn something new about yourself everyday."

Steve surprised himself with that comment. Stark was actually right. Steve would've never in a million years thought he could be someone that would take part in anything revolving around cam girls, much less the action of masturbating with someone he hardly knew. He didn't even know it was a thing to begin with. He was both shocked, and a little anticipatory to see that he was actually learning new things about himself. He didn't expect that from him.

"My pleasure Steve, I take pride in my work," Tony replied, referring to his "therapy." A beat passed, and Tony exchanged an expectant look with Steve, who replied with a confused face, eyebrows furrowed together.

"What?" he asked, and Tony wiggled his eyebrows up and down.

"You know..."

"I don't," Steve responded, raising a questioning brow. Tony rolled his eyes and sighed in defeat,

"The girl, genius. How was she? Who was she? What'd you do? All the details, my friend."

Steve gulped. He had been thinking of you all morning, but he hadn't spoken about you yet, and he was kind of glad he had someone to share the details with. Out of respect for you, he didn't want to get too descriptive, but he would at least share his feelings about you.

"Well, she was real sweet. Calls herself Moonrose Haze, such a pretty name. She's gorgeous, really enjoys what she does, which I liked about her. I really like her, you know? I think we had a real connection. I've been thinking about her."

"Yeah well, don't get too attached. You know how that can go," Tony patted Steve's shoulder, and he nodded understandingly.

Of course he knew that he couldn't get too attached. It could be dangerous for both you and him. For starters, you didn't know who he was for real, and he didn't need you knowing. And because he didn't know you in real life, he didn't want to get hung up on you. He already didn't have time for an actual relationship, bringing the internet into it would be a whole different thing.

He didn't want to get too sucked into it, he didn't want to be brainwashed into feeling strongly for you before he really knew you. But he didn't feel that way at all right now - right now it was more of a feeling that he was glad to know you, glad to have made the connection he made with you. He liked you, and you were on his mind, but he wasn't obsessed, wasn't unable to think straight. He just felt nice and warm inside, that's all. It wasn't anything serious, not yet.

"Yeah, I know. It's nothing to be worried about. I'm just glad to have met her, you know? She's so charismatic and hard working, she works two jobs outside of this one. I really like her personality. And we—" Steve cut himself off, starting to blush, unable to hide it on his fair cheeks.

Tony leaned forward, knowing this would include the gritty details,

"What?"

"We..." Steve looked down as to avoid eye contact with Tony, who chased it even while Steve stared down at his shoes. "We - well - she... helped me." Steve cleared his throat, feeling embarrassed to bring up the memories that made his entire body feel as if it were on fire. He continued, "Helped me, you know... (he lowered his voice here) get off."

"Yowza!" Tony hooted, and Steve's face could never be more red. "Steve, you truly surprise me everyday."

"It wasn't like anything I've ever experienced before," Steve said, a bit more composed now. "I mean, it was- it was... she was incredible. I know she's a performer, but it felt so real, so intimate. And I think she enjoyed it too."

"Wait, don't tell me she joined in on the fun," Tony raised his eyebrows, genuinely surprised, and Steve's head jerked up as he realized he had sort of revealed more details than he'd meant to.

"Well, we-" he began stammering, but Tony just cut him off with an impressed smile.

"My god. I would never expect it from you! Honestly, I'm proud of ya, Cap. You seem to be feeling much better now."

"I do," Steve answered with finality, and Tony nodded.

"Glad to see I could be of assistance. You can always come to me for these type of things you know. I've got all kinds of tricks up my sleeve."

Sure he does, Steve thought, watching as Tony walked out of the room. Now he was thinking of you once more - specifically when he would see you again.

✺ ✺ ✺

You started out your day not so different from Steve. You had great sleep that night, thanks to the powerful orgasm that practically lulled you to sleep, and thanks to meeting Steve. You liked him, too, thought about him with a smile on your face. You were in your apartment, a cheap, shabby apartment which you refurbished to your heart's delight, decorating with new furniture and plants however you could.

It wasn't the most luxurious space, but at least it was yours. And it was what you could afford living on your own in California, where you were from, and paying partially for your schooling. You made good money as a cam girl, but most of that went towards school and your clothing business. You were a busy woman.

As you logged on to girlsonfilm.com that morning to check stats and messages, you were met with memories from the night before. It was hot, sure, but you really, really liked Steve. You had lovely connections with some of your customers, but something about Steve was different. He was new, and almost naive, and had a personality you found adorable. He was mature and appropriate, and you liked that about him.

As always, you were careful. Being a cam girl meant you had to be safe and smart. With Steve, you felt secure enough, but you were always careful with new customers. Once again, it wasn't anything serious... yet. Still, you felt a little lighter on your feet throughout that day.

You were usually in good spirits, outgoing, determined and smiling, but today you just seemed a bit - lighter. Less worried about certain things like finances or your multiple jobs. It was your best friend, Aaliyah, who noticed the change in your demeanor. She tapped you on the shoulder as you sat in your last class of the day, which was at noon.

"Yeah?" you asked, turning your head towards her - you had been sort of looking out into the distance beforehand, thinking all those happy thoughts that stemmed from last night with Steve.

"Earth to YN? What's up with you, you're all... dreamy," Aaliyah hissed urgently, wanting to know everything.

You laughed, looking down at your desk and bringing your arms together, shrugging your shoulders up and down,

"Dude, relax. I just had really good sleep, I'm in a good mood."

"Bitch. I know you're lying, you're my best friend of seven years and you think I can't tell when you're lying? Who has you looking so incredibly happy right now? I need to know so I can threaten them if they ever hurt you!"

"Okay, the fact that you're already assuming it's a person is amazing," you chuckled, turning to face her, pushing your hair from your eyes.

Aaliyah knew how you felt about relationships - you weren't exactly looking for one as you were so busy to begin with, and you'd had bad experiences in the past. You pretended like they didn't hinder you, but pretending only worked for so long. But Aaliyah was always the first to ask about your relationship life anyway - she wanted to see you with somebody who would treat you right, the way you deserved.

"Well? Is it?" Aaliyah prodded.

"No," you shook your head a bit too strongly for Aaliyah to be convinced, and couldn't help but break into laughter at the way she glared at you, eyes narrowed and arms folded across her chest. "Okay, okay. I may or not have done a private session last night."

"Mhm," Aaliyah lowered her voice - she was the only person who knew of your secret job, and she took your privacy very seriously.

"Anddd, I may or may not have met a new customer," you continued slowly, Aaliyah repeating her hums. "And, we may or may not have... had sex? I don't know, it was - virtual, completely online."

"But, you do this often," Aaliyah replied, not understanding the depth of the situation because you often engaged in sexual acts for or with your customers in private sessions.

"Yes, but this time it was different. I felt like... I dunno, like my whole body was on fire. I felt like I was totally in control, and you know, I'm in control other times, but this guy didn't really know what he wanted, so I took the lead. And it was fucking great, I kid you not, I was shaking afterwards. It all just felt so visceral and so fucking real and so, so hot. And... it felt intimate."

"Woah, woah, woah, this is sensory overload right now," Aaliyah raised her brows, impressed with the story and with the person you were talking about. "Intimate how?"

"Like, I just felt really safe and connected with him. I was nervous, I wanted to keep him. I wanted to talk to him again. He was so polite and mature and so... just nice. Oh my god, and he tipped me like, hundreds. He was extremely generous."

Aaliyah was nodding, even more impressed,

"That's what I like to hear! What's his name? What'd he look like?"

"His name's Steve. And, I dunno what he looked like, he had his camera off. Probably some white dude, but honestly he was very handsome sounding. So like, a handsome white dude."

You sensed a shift in Aaliyah's nature, and looked over to her.

"What?" you whined.

"This man couldn't even turn his camera on while you were popping pussy for him? Yet y'all had an intimate connection?" she raised her eyebrows, very straightforward.

You pouted,

"Intimacy doesn't always have to have rules. I get a lot of customers who don't show their face. I'm sure he has his reasons. Besides, it was nice not to have a dick shoved into the camera for once."

The both of you chortled at that, but then Aaliyah went back to business.

"No camera on? He's married with kids."

You made a face and frowned, a crease showing up at your forehead,

"Don't say that! I like him."

Aaliyah let up a little, because she knew you were being serious, and leaned back in her chair.

"You like him?" she asked, and you nodded, biting your lip,

"Yeah."

"You really like him?"

You rolled your eyes,

"Asshole, I don't really like him. I just, think he's cool. And I'm glad we met."

"Okay, good to hear, 'cuz you don't know him and we don't wanna go too fast, girl. You've got options in real life," Aaliyah concluded, and you nodded,

"It's nothing serious. I just like him, that's all. And last night was nice, that's why I feel so refreshed today. You don't have to worry about me. This isn't gonna become like the movie Her."

"Ha," Aaliyah snorted, catching the reference. A beat of silence passed between the two of you, before you broke it suddenly by jerking your head to her to share an urgent detail you didn't want her to miss.

"He fucking came twice!" you whispered loudly. "In the span of thirty minutes!"

Your eyes were wide and brazen, and your lips were pursed tight. Aaliyah blinked slowly, taking in the information.

"Oh wow."

"I know. And his moans, oh my god. And he said his dick size was three fingers long," you held up your hand and cusped the three fingers you had used - ring, middle, and index. "Literally huge!"

"For your sake I hope it's true, if he's got you this hung up," Aaliyah smirked, and you laughed breathlessly, realizing how intense you had just gotten.

"My fault. Don't mind me," you returned to your work now that class was getting started, but the two of you were consumed with giggle fits.

✺ ✺ ✺

Steve actually had put you down on his calendar - mentally, at least. He obviously couldn't drop everything just to spend time with you, but the late times of your shows and his current availability made him feel inclined to use his free time to share with you, at least that week. He almost tried to downplay how much he wanted to see you again, how anticipating he was, because it wasn't like him to feel excited, to smile to himself at the thought of anything.

By the time you went on live again, on a Wednesday night, both you and Steve were filled to the brim with excitement. You wanted to talk again, and Steve wanted to see how you performed on a regular live. So that night, he took a shower, got tucked into bed like he had the last time, and signed on to girlsonfilm.com, which he typed into the browser with jittering hands. He was actually... excited. Something about this was giving him a taste of a feeling that was once rare.

He typed in your name at the search bar, not even taking a second glance at the other livestreams on the screen (more because he was avoiding looking at so many naked bodies at once). You had already started by the time he came on, and you'd been awaiting his arrival.

This time, your setup was different. You were in your "office", a small room in your apartment that served as a workspace for your clothing line, a homework/study area, and a place where you could do your work outside of school. But tonight, like many other nights, it operated as your cam room.

It looked like a strip club, complete with glowing neon lights that shifted colors, an assortment of heels and alcohol bottles behind you, and a disco ball hanging above your head. There was even a sign on the wall behind you that read your name in fancy writing. You leaned forward on your laptop to see who had signed in, a smile reaching your saccharine, glossy lips as the name you were waiting for popped up on screen.

"Steve!" you cooed girlishly, pushing your hair behind your ear subconsciously - you wanted him to see your face. "How are you?"

Steve, who was figuring out the chatroom, commented below in response, eager to hear your voice. A grin had made its way onto his face at the sound of your excitement to see him.

Steve - GrantRoberts

Hi. I'm great, how are you?

You bit down on your lip, intoning,

"Well, better now you're here! Guys, this is Steve, he's new here. Say hi."

Steve skimmed past the comments from her devoted customers saying hello, and you continued with your show, seeming oodles happier now that Steve was on. You already gave it your all, now you would give your all and more.

Steve didn't even need you to do that much to sate him though - looking at your skimpy outfit was enough. You were dressed in a sheer, glittery white lace corset that highlighted all of your assets, with garters on your silky thighs to match.

Then you were wearing these insanely long stripper heels, and boy did Steve have a thing for heels- you wearing them made him nearly salivate. Your lips were painted a sultry red and the rest of your makeup was dewy and glittery, with gems and glitter dust stuck to the sides of your eyes.

You looked ethereal, and the lucid background just made things even better. He was already hard upon looking at you, especially when you shimmied up close to the camera and showed your entire body, your hands running up your thighs and sides in slow motion.

"You guys like my outfit?" you smirked, twirling slowly for the camera. "You know, I love being a dancer, but I get so lonely sometimes. All these guys coming through, but no one to really pleasure me. You know?"

Steve swallowed hard. You were talking to everyone on the live, but looking directly into the camera, an intense look in your eyes. Tonight you were playing out the recurring strip club fantasy, which lots of your customers enjoyed - Steve was new to the whole thing, but he got the gist and story line right away. How could he not with how intensely he was focusing?

You laughed a little, a sultry but brief laugh that made shivers run up Steve's spine. Right now, though you were glad Steve was there, you were in full work mode, pulling all the levers. You were focused, and Steve knew that you weren't only occupied with him. But he even liked that, liked your work ethic and your ferocity.

"I guess I was just wondering if one of you were man enough to take me," you continued, starting to really pile on the dirty talk and the persona.

You kept showing different angles of your body, letting your customers admire you. You turned around, strutting slowly, one leg in front of the other, your heels hitting the ground. Steve's eyes widened at the shape of your ass as you faced the other way, head tilting as he admired your features.

He wasn't the kind of guy to worry about a girl's body type much, and he certainly didn't only focus on your body, but how could he not in this case? You were drawing attention to your every asset, and he was realizing just how much he liked them on you.

Then you slowly twirled around, facing the camera again and lowering yourself down on your knees. You pouted softly, as if you were feeling conflicted.

"But, I haven't seen anyone here who's man enough to take care of me. I have needs too," you sighed, looking down at your nails, which, perfectly, were long and glittery acrylics. "Gosh, and the pay here is lousy. Some guys are so cheap, you wouldn't even believe it."

Kaching. Tokens being added left and right after you said that. You smirked, gazing into the camera for one minute, Steve catching your pixelated gaze, before you kept going. Steve added tokens as well, probably more than all that had been added in that moment. He was impressed by your strategies, and he knew that paying would make things progress.

"I'm just so lonely and bored sometimes," you slowly removed the straps of your corset, revealing your chest. You ran your hands along the lace that was still over your breasts, licking your bottom lip. "Hmm. But I think I'll need more help to remove my top.

More tokens. More talking, more tokens. And soon enough, you had taken off the corset (garters left on, as per special request from many of your customers), and you were naked in front of the camera. Steve felt himself throbbing beneath his boxers, and stroked his length over the fabric.

"Wow, you guys are great," you cooed. "And so much better than some of the other guys who come through here. But not good enough. Poor old me, looks like I'll have to pleasure myself, hmm?"

You wiggled your eyebrows up and down as comic relief while you opened and closed your legs very quickly, giving just a peek of what you knew they all wanted to see.

Ashton — asherw9 guyz, she clearly needs help spreading her legs. can we all do better? + 10 tokens

You giggled,

"Thank you Ashton. I really do need help spreading my legs for you, so I can get all nice and ready. So, tokens or bust."

Soon enough, you had them voting on toys to use as you went through an assortment. All of them were glass dildos with different designs. Each vote was a certain amount of tokens, and they eventually came to a consensus. Steve only voted so he could pay you, he had no idea what he actually wanted to see, nor any idea of how dildos differed from one another.

You smiled when you saw that he had voted, raising your brows at the option he had chosen,

"Steve, you naughty boy. You wanna see me use the biggest one?" Steve blushed— he didn't know any better. But you were smiling, and reading the other options. "It looks like a lot of you wanna see me use the big one. I'll give you like, another minute to decide."

A flood of votes came in and you read them over, smiling as you held up the biggest option.

"This one it is!"

And there you were, giving a tease show as you danced sensually on the floor, wrapping your body around as you removed the bottom half of the corset. Soon enough, your entire body was completely revealed and you were spreading your legs open, your fingers dancing along your clit as you prepared yourself. Soft but sultry music played in the background, but all Steve could hear was the sound of your progressing pants and moans, which were soft and quiet.

He had his hand wrapped around himself, finally out of his boxers, and he was stroking at the same pace that you were circling your clit with your fingers. He spread the precum peeking out from his tip down his erect length, pumping himself slowly as he watched you. He let out a strangled moan as you diligently slid two fingers inside of yourself, your face contorting as you felt them against your walls, reaching all the right spots.

"I'm so fucking wet," you whined, pumping your fingers in and out faster now. You were even more getting tokens and comments by the minute, Steve being the best contributor as he could with only one hand available.

He felt a hint of shame pang in his chest as he realized what he was doing — pleasuring himself online to someone who was doing the same thing for the hundreds of others watching. But in your case, it was for work. For a moment, he almost felt like a perverted loser, pumping himself to you in the dark — but he bounced back after remembering who he was, and after feeling himself throb inside his hands. He wanted to be able to enjoy himself, he shouldn't make himself feel guilty about it, so long as it was rightfully done.

You sighed loudly as you transitioned from using your fingers to the dildo.

"Guys, this thing is huge," you giggled slightly, but that giggle morphed into a pleasantly surprised moan as you began to slide it inside of you. Your slick arousal coated the toy instantly, making it much easier. Your face said it all, as did the whiny pitch in your voice. "Oh fuck."

Steve couldn't control himself. He came quickly once again, but continued stroking himself as you continued. And once again, his release felt cathartic, like he was filling in something that he had long been missing, and only you could bring him to this point. He couldn't do this himself before, not without you.

He wanted so badly to be in a private room with you, to share this moment with you and only you, where you could hear his voice and he knew the two of you were alone. But he knew this would have to do for now, his hands working his cock as he watched you thrust the dildo in and out, your moans growing louder and less contained.

You watched the dildo disappear in and out of you, slipping in with ease because of how wet you were. The sounds it made were criminal and arousing, sounds of your slick against your walls. Your mouth fell open in an o-shape as you watched how well you took it despite its size, admiring of yourself and even more turned on, pushing it deep inside of you.

"Fuck, it feels so good, I'm so fucking wet," you whined, biting down hard on your lip, closing your previously ajar mouth.

Steve watched how well you took it with eyes that were glazed over, wishing it was him instead of a glass toy, wishing he could stretch you out and be that deep inside of you. He groaned to himself, mumbling expletives as he felt his orgasm build up.

"Oh my god, I'm close," you groaned some time later. You threw your head back, bringing your hand to your clit to assist your orgasm. You had been going at it for the past fifteen minutes, putting off your orgasms until you couldn't any longer. Steve was mesmerized, fists practically clenched around himself as you brought yourself to climax. "I want you to cum with me," you moaned. "Oh fuck, yes."

Your moans nearly became shouts as you came, toes curling in your six inch heels. You tried to grip the carpet around you, but to no avail, and you found yourself coming recklessly while the dildo was still inside of you, taking it out just moments after your orgasm began.

You were dripping all down your legs and thighs, the spot on the carpet beneath you completely drenched in your arousal. Steve had came again, and again, his cock twitching and spurring at the sight of you. The longer you rode out your high, the longer Steve rode out his — and needless to say, he could keep up.

You took in deep breaths as you got caught up, leaving your legs spread for your viewers' pleasure. As per one request, you lead your fingers to your slick heat, spreading yourself open so everyone could see, a smirk on your face.

Once Steve had come down, he decided to type something in the chat.

Steve - GrantRogers

Thank you, this was wonderful.

You snorted at Steve's response — always so polite and proper. You closed your legs and crawled up closer to the camera so they could only see your face and your upper half.

"I hope you guys liked that. I don't think I've ever used that one before, but trust me, I will be using it again. Thanks for the suggestion," you winked. "You can join me next week for a giveaway! I'll be selling my panties, those purple butterfly ones you guys love so much?"

You watched as the comments flooded with praise and excitement, and chuckled,

"Yeah, those. So check in next week on how to enter, rules and more. I hope you guys enjoyed today, thank you so much for being the most beloved members of my little strip club here. See you later!"

Easily, you blew a kiss to the camera, and ended the show. At first, Steve was a little bummed. He was hoping for another private session, so he could talk to you a little more. But he understood that it wouldn't be today, and started to exit out of the site until he heard a ping! notification. He looked on the upper right corner of the screen to see that he had a new message.

moonrose — moonrosehaze hey! got a minute? click the link in the chat if you do!

Steve slowly clicked the link, hoping that it was what he was expecting and not some type of scam. And luckily, it was — it rerouted him to the same link as last time, giving him the option to hide his video and only use audio. He chose that option and you showed up on screen, in a silk pajama top and shorts, still in the same room as before, just not in the act anymore. Once he saw you, he grinned, and you smiled as well when he joined.

"Hey!" you exclaimed excitedly. "How are you?"

You typically didn't do this - usually customers reached out to you, not the other way around. But just because you weren't offering private sessions tonight didn't mean you couldn't still talk to a client. Especially a client who you happened to really like. And of course, the two of you were being careful, precautions still fresh in your mind. But you were enjoying your time together so far in this excited new beginning. There were no red flags and nothing to be worried about.

Steve laughed, his voice deep and almost cloudy - after coming down from two orgasms he felt dreamlike. His voice was warm and inviting, and you felt that awfully familiar buildup of an orgasm in your stomach, though it wasn't the same. Maybe more like butterflies, except instead of just being nervous, you were both nervous and turned on.

"Hi," he crooned, feeling his cheeks warm up at the sight of you. You were so enchanting and bright, even if you were behind a screen. You had a youthful glow that made you look and feel genuinely happy and vivacious. Even after just a few days, he found himself admiring you, and not just for your sexual prowess. "I'm great, how are you? You were amazing, by the way. That was... I've never seen anything like that before."

You giggled, appreciative of his constant praise, but it raised the question,

"I can't thank you enough. You've watched porn before though, right?"

At first, you thought Steve's innocence was only unique to cam sites, but now you were starting to question just how experienced he really was with this world. He seemed to know how to tip, and tipped very well. As for talking to you, he was charming and polite thus far, so he seemed to know how to interact with women who had jobs like yours - you hoped he was this kind universally, and not just to you. You hoped you knew him, the little bit that he was showing, not just a version of him that he was pretending to be.

Steve shifted a bit, smiling shyly to himself,

"Not really... do I sound that clueless?"

"No," you giggled, shaking your head, but he could tell you were just being coy, which made him smile.

"Be honest," he prodded you, and you laughed louder,

"Yeah, a little. But don't feel bad! That's a first. Usually guys your age are well versed in this sort of thing. It's... kind of sweet. And I like that you're new to this. It makes it easier to get you excited," you veered into flirting with him again, smiling gently into the camera.

"Oh yeah?" Steve questioned playfully, and you nodded.

"Oh, for sure. Listen, I'm really tired from my show so I can't promise anything like what I just did, but if you want me to pose for you or..."

You trailed off, but Steve was quick to jump in, shaking his head. He didn't expect anything from you at the moment, although he wouldn't mind, but if you were tired, then you knew your limits, and he didn't want to push them for his own sake. He knew it was your job, but he still had his own sense of morals.

"No, no, it's okay, hon'. You worked really hard just now, don't feel pressured to do something for me just because. It's nice to just talk to you anyway, you didn't even have to do this," Steve said calmly, and you felt your heart warming more and more with every word he spoke, especially when he called you "hon" — he gave you the energy of such a kind older man.

Of course Steve wanted to see something from you again - of course he'd cherish it, die for it. But he had been sated for the night, and talking to you was enough. Still in the back of his mind he questioned whether he should be talking to you like this at all - it was the second night you had spoken. But he pushed those doubts to the back of his mind for now - not now Steve, not now, he thought.

"Aww, thank you," you pouted out of happiness and appreciation.

He acknowledged how hard you worked, and the fact that it was hard work. And he didn't have to be so gracious about it, so appreciative and the way he was. You were almost glad he just wanted to talk, even though you would've been willing to at least pose for him or dirty talk him to climax once again. What you'd do to hear his moans and hear his gruff voice in particular.

You continued,

"I'm... I'm glad you liked the show. I'm glad you came, honestly. I know we've only talked once but I like you. I feel like we connected immediately."

Steve felt an unfamiliar pang in his chest that he brushed off as the typical butterflies that were spreading. He already addressed that this entire thing made him nervous in general, but he didn't think anything more of it.

"We did. Somehow, someway," he chuckled a bit awkwardly, and you smiled at his shy nature. "I'm— I'm really glad I came to. I was looking forward to this."

"So how was your day?"

"Honestly? I've been so much better since the last time. I mean, you really helped out. I feel like..." Steve took a deep sigh. "Like a weight's been lifted off my shoulders, y'know? What about you?"

"I know the feeling. I sort of felt the same way. Huh. Gosh, it's weird, it's not like we're-" you decided not to finish your own sentence, laughing as you brushed it off as silly. "Anyway. Today was great. Yeah."

"Yeah? You uh... take any classes today?" Steve asked, recalling how you told him about your life as a student and as an artist. He cringed internally at how awkward he was being. There was still that spark, but the two of you were both resisting conversation because you didn't want to face the reality of establishing a relationship with each other, even if it was just client to camgirl. It felt more personal. "I'm sorry," he chuckled to himself. "I'm not great with small talk."

"I mean, I'm sure - if I were a scientist, I'd want to be talking about, like, I don't know - nuclear physics. Environmental studies doesn't quite feel like your area of science," you giggled, and Steve remembered (though he hadn't forgotten) how he had passed himself off as a scientist. Maybe more of a scientific experiment, but it couldn't hurt to say he was a scientist, could it? He was surrounded by them after all.

Steve laughed, shaking his head,

"You'd be surprised how much I don't wanna talk about nuclear physics half the time. Hey, can I ask you something?"

"Yeah," you propped yourself up, wanting to know what he wanted to know about you.

"You like this, right? Like, being, well-"

"A cam girl?" you furrowed your brows together and laughed, shaking your head playfully. "You can say it, don't worry, I don't bite. But uh, wow, I guess no one's really ever asked me that on here. I do, actually. I think a lot of girls on here like this job, but I really love it. It feels liberating, which is great. But it also pays my bills. So it's a balance between the two. I can kind of be whoever I want on here."

"So in real life, Moonrose is... not a thing," Steve concluded, and you shifted. "If you don't mind me asking." He just wanted to understand the dynamics of this job, how you worked the ins and outs - almost like an agent. You weren't that different from his colleagues.

Usually you'd be a bit more hesitant to answer such a question, but Steve made you feel comfortable.

"It's perfectly okay. I'm still the same girl, you know? So it's very much a thing, it feels like Moonrose is... a part of me. But it's just not the same way it feels on here, if that makes sense. It's an act, but it's really... just me."

"I like that. And I like that you enjoy your job."

"Now, can I ask you a question?"

A pause, then Steve answered. It couldn't be that bad.

"Sure," he nodded.

"Okay," you bit down on your lip. "What made you choose me?"

You hated that question - "what made you choose me?" It left a bitter taste in your mouth. So many times, in your relationships in real life, you felt like you had to ask that question to get reassurance. To feel supported. But with Steve, it was obviously different. And right now, asking that question didn't feel so bad. You didn't feel like because he chose you, you were special. You felt like you were special before he even chose you.

Steve grinned,

"Honestly, I had been scrolling for a while, but none of the other girls stood out for me. And I came across you and you were smiling and you seemed happy. You talked to your customers like they were your fans. You just made it look so charming and graceful. It felt genuine."

"Thanks, I try. Well, I'm glad we crossed paths. It's nice talking to you, even if it's not for a private cam. I hope that doesn't make you uncomfortable, doing this-"

"No, no, not at all. I was hoping I'd get to talk to you too, so."

"Oh," you chuckled— you nearly snorted, pushing your hair back and laughing in tandem with Steve. Your awkward moments together were actually fitting and charming, and didn't feel "awkward" at all. You presented as confident, sexy and seductive Moonrose, but Steve brought out the dork in you, made you feel less like Moonrose and more like YN, in the best way ever. "Cool."

Steve liked this. He reveled in the quiet for a moment, just looking at you, your skin glowing, teeth showing when you smiled, everything about you was evocative. But he looked at the time, realizing he had briefings in the morning.

"Well, unfortunately, it looks like I gotta go. Got... labs in the morning, and stuff."

"Oh, yeah for sure, no, go ahead. Gotta get your sleep."

"You too," he encouraged you, almost like a protective figure. "Get some rest."

"Thanks." You took in a deep breath and took the leap you'd been wanting to take the whole call. You loved talking to Steve, but you had been thinking about what Aaliyah had said. You didn't feel as bothered by it as she had, but you figured it was worth a try. You could see if anything would change. And maybe it wasn't an "appropriate" statement, but you were taking a leap of faith. "Wish I could see you. You know, through your camera?"

At first, Steve's heart dropped. He definitely couldn't commit to that. But he knew it was fine, he didn't have to commit to anything at all. He just chuckled,

"Oh, not this time."

You nodded gently, understanding. It was like you told Aaliyah, plenty of customers didn't use their cameras. But you wished you could see Steve, see the face that matched that enchanting voice and those lovely words.

"I understand. Well, I'll see you... or, hear you, next time?"

"Yeah, doll. See you."

And with that, he ended the session, and closed his laptop. Much to think about. And all of it revolved around you.

ahh how are we feeling!! i made their dialogue a leeetle bit awkward bc i didn’t wanna make it super mushy. it’ll be slow burn but not agonizingly slow jus wait on itttt!!! let me know your reactions!!! tags will be linked in a reblog :)

#steve rogers x reader #steve rogers imagine #steve rogers reader insert #steve rogers series #girls on film #orbitariums #captain america #captain america x reader #captain america imagine #captain america smut #smut #marvel #marvel imagine #marvel smut #chris evans #steve rogers #steve rogers x y/n #reader insert #marvel series

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theonetheycallhannah · 4 years

Text

The Treatment of Capt. Syverson-Chapter One: Evaluation

Pairing: Captain “Sy” Syverson x OFC (Shane Benton)

Shane Benton gets a new patient, veteran “Sy” Syverson. He’s one of the most complex cases she’s had, in more ways than one. She thinks he’s already starting to like her and what’s worse...she feels the same.

Word Count: 2.3k

Warnings: None, really, mentions of war and trauma and some hate on the Chicago Cubs, but like…it’s not MEAN! (I’m a Missouri girl, and for the purposes of this fic, Sy is a Missouri boy, and we will bleed for our sports teams. Lol!)

A/N: Inspired by this post right here, and hopefully turning into some splendid fluffy and smutty stuff for my lovely Cavillry babes all around including the two that essentially forced me into this. Lol! (I’m thinking I’ll have at least three or four more chapters.

Disclaimer: Unfortunately for me, Henry is not mine, le sigh, and all mention of him, his characters, or his precious doggy, Kal, are strictly for transformative and recreational use. I neither ask for, nor accept payment for the work I post on Tumblr or AO3.

Tags: @onlyhenrys @cavillryarchive

Let me know if you wish to be added to the list! I’m happy to do it!

Shane was working on her morning's notes as she scarfed down her lunch. So many hand's-on patients made for a busy so called "lunch hour." Time which their boss was always reminded them was only half for their personal use, and could be taken away if census demanded. She was pretty sure it wasn't legal to make such threats, but thankfully, the secretaries usually had the therapists backs.

As she typed, she got a notification in her messenger app.

Just a head's up, your 1:30 is such a major babe I could barely look at him while I checked him in, so good luck with that.

Heather, one of her best friends in the office, had warned her, as she always did when there was a potential problem with a patient.

Oh, and his KOOS score is 27.5! Yikes! Shit, she'd seen arthritic grandparents with better scores on that test, which essentially rated your ability with the affected knee. Ideal was 100. She pulled up his chart review to see what she was getting herself into with this guy.

Tricare insurance, so, a vet. And only a year older than she was, so, recent discharge, or even active duty. She pulled up his order…shit. Traumatic tear of the anterior cruciate ligament. With damage to the medial collateral ligament as well. And a patellar dislocation. Repairs had been done, but this guy was in bad shape. He was going to be coming a while.

She replied to Heather.

Damn, that's bad. I'm looking at his order, and I'm already thinking I'm gonna want to try to keep him on my schedule if we can. And three times a week. If not with me, Jordan, if he's got openings. Can you start working on that when you have time?

Sure thing…I think you'll be glad you kept him on your caseload once you get a look at his face…and like all of him. Even on crutches, he's tall as shit!

Heather, come on. I'm a professional. I have a doctorate ffs. Lol

You also have a uterus, to the best of my knowledge, and it's about to explode. Promise.

Haha, okay. I'll be out for Prince Charming in about ten. Lemme pop a breath mint and run a brush through my hair.

Good call.

Shane did just that, but still pulled her dark hair back into her customary functional high ponytail, made sure there was no stray food on her shirt, and headed out of her treatment room for her patient.

As she walked down the hall to the waiting area to get him, she noticed a slumped and bearded figure leaning forward on a set of crutches, a KC Chiefs baseball cap slipping up off of his forehead revealing short cropped dark hair. She smiled at his repping one of her home teams, and stepped up to him, greeting him warmly, but formally.

"Mr. Syverson?"

"Ma'am." he said, as he adjusted his cap and stood immediately at attention, still relying on the crutches, but making himself as tall as possible. He really was a soldier. Despite her proximity to Fort Leonard Wood here in St. Robert, Missouri, she didn't see many military men.

"Hi, My name is Shane. I'm a physical therapist. I'm going to be working with you today."

"Oh, okay. They told me my therapists name was Shane, I figured…"

"Yeah, I get that a lot. Don't worry, I act like one of the guys. You'll hardly notice."

"I doubt that." he muttered, but she ignored it. She didn't know which would be worse. Him being a macho chauvinist who couldn't deal with a female therapist, or having a crush on her and making things weird. She'd had both. And it never ended well for her.

"Well, let's go have a chat in the treatment room."

They walked toward the room she'd just left, and when they arrived, she asked him to set on her plinth mat.

"Could you please verify your date of birth for me? Gotta make sure I got the right patient in here."

"May the 5th, 1983."

"Thanks, and the last four of your social?"

He told her, quietly, and against her will, a shiver ran up her spine at the softness the bear of a man exhibited in his voice when trying to maintain privacy. But she kept her composure.

"Excellent." she began typing her eval note, and asking him questions. He began telling the harrowing story of the mission, the mission that effectively ended his career in the military as he knew it. At lest, what he could tell her. Obviously some of it was classified, but certain details she would need to know in order to know how he it and how to treat him. She could tell he was trying to hold it together. Reliving the trauma was probably triggering to an extent. Her heart went out for the broad-chested, blue-eyed man.

"God, that's incredible. The fact that you're alive is amazing, Mr. Syverson."

"I go by Sy, ma'am. And as aware as I am of that, it's tough to feel good about it when some friends in my squad weren't so lucky." he examined the pattern on the tile floor as he rubbed the heel of his hand against the wide thigh of his injured leg. A nervous habit, she presumed. She had similar quirks.

"That must be difficult for you." she knew she was getting off-track from what she needed for her SOAP note, but after all, he was going to be on her caseload exclusively for the foreseeable future. She'd have time to flesh out the goals and basically finish the eval next visit.

"Yeah, but I know there's a lotta guys' got it worse'n me, ma'am."

"We think that should make it better, but it never does. And if I'm calling you 'Sy,' you have to cut the ma'am business. It's Shane, even to my patients." she smiled.

"Sorry, m--sorry. Habits die hard."

"Just like John McClean." she chuckled, not expecting him to get her ridiculous movie humor. But he laughed.

"Did you just make a Die Hard reference?" he smiled, and the sunshine of it paired with the stunning blue of his eyes nearly sent her flying into the wall. Thankfully, she had something to occupy her gaze in the form of her laptop, where she tried to document on him.

"Did you just get one of my movie references? Because nobody around here appreciates that I'm a total movie nerd. I'm wasted on these people."

"Ya know, maybe you're right about feeling like I'm getting PT from a guy." he chuckled.

"I told ya!" she laughed, but tried not to let her heart sink too far.

The evaluation continued with her doing strength and range of motion measurements on his knee. "Okay, push against my hand…now resist when I push…now bring your foot back against my hand…and resist when I pull." she did this with both sides to compare relative strength. "Great job. Okay, I'm going to see how much range you have in your knee. Lay back on the table for me, please." she thought she saw a flirty glint in his eye, but again, she ignored it. She had a job to do. And it was to hold this goniometer up to his knee and see how many degrees of flexion and extension this man had in the joint while trying not to think any salacious thoughts about the thigh connected to it.

"Okay, now, listen, Sy, I know it goes against your instinct, but I'm looking for pain-free range of motion, here, so don't be a hero. Don't move it farther than you can without hurting it. And let me know if it starts to hurt when I move it."

"Yes, ma'am." he winked.

"I'll let that one slide, I guess." she giggled. She concentrated on the numbers she was getting from the big protractor, and typing them into her eval, and not the man lying before her.

"Okay, I'm gonna get the other knee now to compare for goals."

He nodded.

"Were you pretty active before this happened?" she was more or less making small talk, as she could tell by the condition of the rest of his body that he was incredibly fit.

"Yes, m--yes, I was. We had a gym on base, nothin' like what y'all have here, just some machines and a few free weights."

"No bikes or treadmills or anything?" She herself liked the elliptical, but knew it was a considered more of a girl's machine in the gym world.

"Nah, with electric being spotty where we were stationed, we sorta had to…get creative, I guess you could say, for cardio." she let it slide, apparently there was an inside joke to which she wasn't privy.

"Right, understandable. Well, here, we don't have to get that creative. I'm gonna put you on some equipment gradually, and just warm up the knee, then get to work on joint mobilization and myofascial release. But at this point in Dr. Potter's protocol, he only wants gentle stretching and weight bearing as tolerated. We can start a bit of strengthening after next week."

"So, you think I'll be back to running anytime soon?"

"We can make that a goal, Sy, because I can absolutely get you there. But you're going to have to take it slow. You've got not one, but three major injuries we have to contend with, and there is major trauma in there. But it will heal. With time and effort. And like I said, don't be a hero. The number one rule of therapy is 'if it hurts, don't do it.'"

"I'll hold you to that, m--Shane."

"You're a quick study, Sy. I think you'll be alright. Looks like Heather's put some appointments in for you already. If any of them don't work, call us, and we'll try to get them swapped. I'd like to keep you on my schedule as much as possible, but if there's a conflict in your schedule, any of our therapists will be terrific. And I'll make sure they're looking at your chart and protocol thoroughly before seeing you."

"Sounds like a plan to me."

"Okay, I'm gonna print out your schedule for you, and a few exercise handouts I'd like you to work on, especially on days you don't come here. And I'll know if you don't do them, because you won't have improved…so, you better do them."

"Yes, ma'am." she half expected a salute. She rolled her eyes.

"Okay, maybe I'll give you three strikes on the ma'am thing."

"Baseball fan, too?"

"Not that three strikes is so obscure that I'd have to be to know it, but, yes! Major St. Louis Cardinals fan."

"I knew I was gonna like you from the start. Although, being brought up 'round Kansas City m'self, I'm more of a Royals fan."

"Hey, only time I don't root for KC is when they're playing my Redbirds. And even if my team loses to them, it hurts less than if they lose to, say…the Cubs." they shared a scowl of disdain for the Chicago team. "Although, I was happy for them and their fans when they won the series back in 16."

"Yeah, I guess we could afford to let them win one in a hundred years…I'm hoping their next one comes long after I'm in the ground." he chuckled.

"Can't have them getting a big head, can we?"

"Nope! Sure can't!" they both laughed at their mutual interest in dissing rival sports teams.

"Okay, I'll be right back with those handouts." she ran to the office all in one machine to grab the papers she'd printed for him, making sure they were all his and not another patient's. She put them in one of their folders and headed back to her room where he sat on the mat, waiting for her with a smile under his rather impressive beard.

"Before I let you out of here, what questions can I answer for you about what we did today?"

"Oh, uh, nothing comes to mind. You explained everything really well. Did you look at my schedule? Am I with you all the time?"

"Hmm, let's see here, looks like the next two, yes, but I'm off next week, so Heather put you with Jordan, which is what I asked her to do. You two will work great together and he's got a great instinct for injuries like this. And I'll talk to him before I leave. He's one of the best PTAs I've ever worked with, I promise."

"I guess, if you have to take a vacation. I'll see you next time though."

"I'm looking forward to it. That's when the real work will begin, Sy. And our number is on in this paperwork if you have questions, and I've put my card in here, too." they shook hands, and he grabbed the folder from her.

She saw him out of the room and into the lobby. She'd finished with him a bit early, but her next one was already waiting. She needed a break. To collect herself. To breathe.

"Jason! Hey! Go on and get on the recumbent bike, level two. Ride until I get there. We'll get a lot done today if you're already warmed up. I've got a note to finish. And then I'll be in. I should be 15 or less."

While the 19 year old with a torn meniscus hopped to her instructions, she went back to her computer to attempt to finish Sy's eval and pretend that she didn't already have a serious and intense crush on him. This was going to be a long twelve weeks…at least.

Up Next: Chapter Two-Therapeutic Procedure

#henry cavill #henry cavill fanfic #captain syverson #captain syverson fanfic #captain syverson x ofc #netflix sand castle #sand castle

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ryqoshay · 4 years

Note

So I just finished reading all of How to Handle a Nico and I absolutely fucking loved it, do you have any NicoMaki fanfic recommendations of your own?

I must offer my apologies for the delay in response. I did not forget you, Anon, despite answering two questions that came in after this one. However, I wanted to wait until I knew I had a good amount of time I could dedicate to making a proper list of recommendations worthy of my time in the LL/NicoMaki fandom, which is typically sometime during my weekend.

Also, please bear in mind that this list is not all-inclusive. NicoMaki has one of, if not the most extensive list of fanworks out of the various LL ships. If someone reading this list is a fan of, or the author of a given work not included, please do not take it personally, this is merely a sampling of my favorites. There are genres and tags that I tend to avoid for various reasons, and there are many perfectly good works with the NicoMaki ship tag that I haven’t read simply because they are not the primary focus. And due to current events, as well as those of last year, there is a sizable backlog of NicoMaki focused fics that I hope to get around to reading sometime soon.

And as I expect this to get long, I will put the list itself under a cut.

First and foremost, I must shamelessly shill an author whose first forays into NicoMaki fanfic are based on HtHaN. It’s been almost a year since the first one went up and I remain in awe that I was able to pay forward the inspiration given to me by other authors. For this list I will only be including said works based on HtHaN, though VNVdarkangel has written some other NicoMakis I haven’t read yet. - Always there - Nico wakes up in the middle of the night. Some post-canon fluffy angst. - On tracks to the heart - Takes place during the scene transition in Homecoming. - Meet ‘n’ greet - Nico has a meet ‘n’ greet event and Maki shows up - Part-time idol composer - Nico hires Riko to compose some idol music for Egao. Minor YohaRiko to keep up the casual connections between HtHaN and HL. - Next steps... - A long, multi-chapter work that takes place after the numbered chapters of HtHaN. This work tells the story of NicoMaki as they take advantage of the research mentioned way back in Telling Mama. Yay science babies! - Out of focus - Maki can’t focus on anything but Nico - The door to dreams - Riko finds the piano from How to Celebrate a Maki and Maki finds Riko. More minor YohaRiko from HL. - Idol trainer - A non-NicoMaki, RinPana honorable mention tied to HtHaN

Next, I must link a few things from jstonedd, whose works I can point to as being among those that helped cement NicoMaki as a my favorite ship. - Buy Your Love - By the gods, I’ve honestly lost track of how many times I’ve reread this fic. It is also responsible for my headcanon that Tsubasa teaches Honoka how to skate, which I thusly include in Nico on Ice. - Soldier Wars - If memory serves, this work earns its M rating less for lewd stuff and more for action movie depictions of violence, like an R rated Charlie’s Angels or something. - After School Troublemakers - Earns its tag of Fluff and Crack. - Babies Maybe - More Fluff and Crack I only skimmed the first few chapters of Otonokizaka Private Academy and it didn’t seem very NicoMaki focused or really much my cup of tea. But I’ve heard others like it, and it was finally completed a few years back, so there’s that.

One author with whom I’ve interacted moreso than any other - maybe not VNVdarkangel as of late, but... - is the creator of one of my favorite Fantasy AUs, which is often a genre I don’t read much as it so often leans on Harry Potter, of which I’m quite unfamiliar. Of course I say I often avoid Fantasy AUs despite now writing two... Anyway, we have a few differing headcanons and I must say it’s fun to have a civil discussion about them - as opposed to others that become heated and dissolve into ad hominum attacks like the one marked by Comment Deleted tombstones in the comments of HtHaN. Anyway, that train of thought derailed, so here are some of lonelypond’s works. Worth mentioning that most works take place in the U.S. instead of Japan, something that confused me for a few chapters when I first started reading, but have come to enjoy it, especially when places are mentioned that I know. - Casual Lunacy - The aforementioned Fantasy AU as well as my introduction to this wonderful writer. Pulls in a quirky character from Gekkan Shoujo Nozaki-kun, an adorable anime I’ve been meaning to finish. Maki is a werewolf. And I really need to reread this one at some point. - PhotoJazz - Maki is a photographer and Nico is an actress. - AU Yeah August - A collection of short 1 Shots. I haven’t read all of them, e.g. the Harry Potter one, but those I have were adorable, e.g. Summer Camp, Fake Dating and FWB. - Christmas Confections - A collection of amazing Christmas themed works that rank among my favorite gifts each year since I first started reading them. I’d link them each individually, but they’re all amazing so just read them all; you won’t be disappointed. Maki and Christmas just go together and lonelypond writes them well. - Can’t Get Started - To quote the summary “Nishikino Maki is trying to make it in the piranha fishbowl of movies, music and Hollywood. Yazawa Nico already has. And they keep crashing into each other.” Literally. It’s quite amusing. I’ve heard good things from other readers about the 1Kiss series but have only skimmed a few; they are high on my To Read list. The Idol House series came out during my troubled 2019, so it also remains on my To Read list. The Moonlight series seems to focus on NozoEli, which is fine, but for better or worse lowers it position on my To Read list. It’s lonelypond, so I do intend to read it eventually, but there are more NicoMaki focused fics that I’d like to get to first.

Next up is Lucia Hunter, a case where I must separate author from work. To this day I remain uncertain as to the details of the issues between this author and the denizens of Sukutomo, but the animosity exists nonetheless. Still, the listed works below were part of my gateway drugs into the wonderful world of NicoMaki fanfics. - The Diamond Princess’s Melancholy - How NicoMaki came together. - Love marginal - My favorite portrayal of KotoHonoUmi. NicoMaki is a side pairing here, and remain so through the rest of the works, but they’re still worth reading, imho. - Shiranai Love*Oshiete Love - RinPana focus but NicoMaki still plays their role. - Garden of Glass - de de deee de de deee Obviously NozoEli focused.

My first encounter with Rinforzando was a T rated cute and fluffy fic but they’ve done some pretty good NSFW works as well. - Ten Years - Always enjoy a good adult NicoMaki fic. - Limbo - NSFW FWB NicoMaki - Caprice - NSFW 2nd Person post-canon NicoMaki. I’m not typically a fan of 2nd Person perspective, but this one was worth it. - Cheers for Loving You - NicoMaki Secret Santa.

Hidekins is another author that has written a lot of NicoMaki I’ve enjoyed, but on a quick scan through the AO3 entries, few are jogging my memory with title and description alone. Perhaps I’ve read more here on tumblr? Perhaps I’ll come back and add more if I remember them better later. - NicoMakisses - A set of five cute short NicoMaki stories about kisses.

Saberin writes a lot of 3rd year stuff, and that’s fine, but the NicoMaki collection is worth checking out. - Prickly Love - As of writing this list, there are 10 chapters of cuteness

whoneedsapublisher writes a lot and I enjoy the style. Thus, when I see NicoMaki pop up on the account, I try to read. - Couples Therapy - One of my favorite Maki headcanons is included here. Not explicit but earns its M rating and thus is NSFW. - Subtle - Not particularly crazy about the Nico-taller-than-Maki, but that’s a minor complaint compared to the rest of this wonderful work. - At Least Six Confessions - Presequel to the above work. Poor Nico had her work cut out for her with a romantically dense Maki. - Keep Your Promises - Ten years later... - Happy New Year - Sometimes stalemates must be broken by someone. - Hidden Depth - Nico’s voice changes. And Maki likes it - Pretending to Pretend - Not explicit, but earns its M rating so NSFW. One of my favorite examples of the Fake Dating trope. - Merry Christmas Maki - I can’t think of a better present. - No Lies Allowed - Truth of Dare, NicoMaki style. - All Dressed Up - Based on a wonderful pic by noelclover - Santa’s Stand-in - Guess who still believes... - Switcheroo - Always love the idea of the girls trying to behave like the others. Makes me want to rewatch that episode. - Tick, Tock - Some introspective Maki - Insensitive - NicoMaki dating issues - Tomatoes - Maki’s favorite food I’ve heard good things about Dazzling Warrior Nightshade, so it’s on my To Read List, but I must admit I can be picky about my Magical Girls stuff. Madoka set an... interesting bar for the genre for me and in most cases I’d prefer to watch it as an anime or read it as a manga/doujin. Still, the idea of Nico being a magic girl amuses me greatly, thus why the fic remains on my radar.

And here are some other random works I’ve enjoyed over the years. - Smile, Nico Nico! - In which Nico drags Maki to the dentist - Billiards - NSFW 2nd Person. Yes, I know I just said I’m not typically a fan, but this one was also good. - Piano For Beginners - NSFW AU where Maki is assigned to teach Nico how to play the piano so as to be convincing for a film. - critical rules for not-dating - NSFW FWB AU that I need to finish reading someday but was happy enough with what I’ve read that I’d still recommend it. - 24 visits - Visits as in Nico the idol visiting Maki the doctor in the hospital. - 24 dates - A NSFW followup to 24 visits

So yeah, that’s a fairly decent list to get one started in their AO3 NicoMaki delving. As mentioned above, this is not all-inclusive and there are a ton of NicoMaki works out there. I haven’t visited FFN in years, so there may still be some authors that post there exclusively and have written some amazing stuff, but I cannot recommend what I haven’t read, or at least skimmed. I also have some tumblr works bookmarked... somewhere, so if I find them I might compare them to this list and maybe add those missed.

Here’s hoping something here piques your interest and makes you fall a little more for the wonderful NicoMaki.

#Ryqo's Q&A #NicoMaki #fanfic stuff

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let-it-raines · 5 years

Text

Catch Me If You Can (20/?)

298 days. That’s how long Killian Jones was away from a baseball field. It’s less than a year, only part of a season for him, but it might as well have lasted a decade as he alternated between physical therapy and spending an excessive amount of time sitting on his couch.

But then he came back and won the World Series.

It’s something no one saw coming, and it’s certainly not something anyone who knows about his arm would predict. Now it’s a new season with new possibilities, and anything could happen. On-field reporter Emma Swan will be there to cover it all even if she is not his biggest fan right now.

Asking her out live on-air will do that.

Rating: Mature

a/n: shout out to @resident-of-storybrooke for beta-ing this bad boy even if I did find a hell of a lot of typos doing my final read for this chapter. It’s okay. We all make mistakes 😉

(It’s me. I made the mistakes because I’m the one making those typos.)

Found on AO3: Beginning | Current

Tumblr: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 |15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20

Tag list: @eala-captian @galaxyzxstark @xellewoods @mariakov81 @ultraluckycatnd @royalswan @shey-starsfury @superchocovian @sals86 @iam2307 @ashley-knightingale @karenfrommisthaven @scientificapricot @captswanis4vr @ultimiflos @jamif @idristardis @nikkiemms @resident-of-storybrooke @tiganasummertree @bmbbcs4evr @onceuponaprincessworld @jennjenn615 @mayquita @captainsjedi @teamhook @notoriouscs @kmomof4 @ekr032-blog-blog@cs-forlife @andiirivera @jonirobinson64 @qualitycoffeethings @youraverageshipper

-/-

The game plays on the television in the weight room as Killian works with free weights to work out his arm and his shoulder. He’s already been massaged by Archie today even though he’s not playing, but when he woke up there was a slight ache there that wasn’t pleasant to live with. It’s still there, but it’s manageable, just a small little niggling feeling that he feels if he lifts something that’s too heavy or twists in just the right, or wrong, way. But it’s fine, as it always is, because the pain doesn’t last for too long and is always manageable.

How many athletes walk around every day living with manageable pain when the world thinks that their bodies are in the most pristine conditions?

That’s always been kind of funny to him, and it hasn’t been until the past two years that he’s understood why. Fans of baseball, of any sport really, sit in the stands, on their couches, and on barstools at the restaurant yelling at athletes to do the impossible with their body, and then when they can’t or get hurt doing it, yell at them for not having some kind of superhuman strength. He’s had so many people bemoan to him about the public part of his accident, one that was traumatizing on a personal and professional level with effects still lingering to today, and they don’t seem to understand that the men and women on fields and courts or in swimming pools are human beings who have pushed their bodies to the limits for most of their lives.

And he doesn’t even play one of the most physically demanding sports, though it can be much more demanding than most people think, especially for his arm.

Hell, definitely for his arm.

But he loves it. That’s the thing. Killian loves this game, loves his team, loves getting to stand out on that field even on the days where only a quarter of the seats are filled up. It’s been his passion for so long, the thing that he is truly good at, and he can’t imagine doing anything else even if he’s had back-up plan after back-up plan and will have to do something with his life when this is all over.

Today isn’t that day.

“Hey,” Robin says as he enters the weight room, his hair slicked back from a shower so that Killian knows that he’s not actually in here to talk, “you wanted to talk to me?”

Oh, and the fact that Killian told him that he wanted to talk. That will definitely do it.

“Yeah, one minute,” he sighs, running through one more rep before putting the weights down on their rack and adjusting the hat on his head so that he can wipe away the sweat on his brow before turning to look at Robin who is sitting on a weight bench. “Roseman sucks today.”

“That’s what you wanted to talk to me about?”

“No, no,” Killian corrects, taking the seat across from Robin on another bench and leaning forward so that his clasped hands rest between the open space between his knees. Taking a quick glance toward the door, he sees that no one is around, and with the music blaring so loudly throughout the hallways, he knows no one will be able to hear anyways. “So, I feel like I’m making the rounds delivering news when I really should have gotten you all together at one time to get it over with, but Ariel has been impossible to get to sit still for more than a second and Will talks too loudly for me to tell him in person and – ”

“Are you dying or something?” Robin laughs, his brows raised in confusion.

“I’m not dying,” he reassures Robin even as his hand reaches up to scratch behind his ear. “I’m, well, I’m dating Emma Swan, and while we’re keeping it quiet from the media and most everyone else, we decided to tell the people who are close with us, hence you and A and Eric and Will. Plus, obviously, my family, who are the only ones I’ve managed to tell so far.”

Robin doesn’t say anything at first, his eyes widened as he takes the information in, and while Killian knew the reaction he was expecting when he told Liam and Elsa – Liam was surprised and far too overbearing and Elsa literally told him that she figured it out at Addy’s birthday party – he hasn’t quite been able to come up with a clear idea of how his friends would react.

Silence and confusion have been his best guesses.

“For how long?” Robin finally stutters out.

“A couple of months.”

“And you’re serious about her?”

“That I am.”

“And this is a secret?”

Why does he feel like this is an exact repeat of the conversation he had with Liam and pretty much the same as the conversation Emma relayed that she had with David?

“Yeah, for Emma. After everything with me and then all of the backlash that she gets with her job, we wanted to keep it quiet. At first, it was so that we could figure things out, but now that we’re more comfortable, we’re telling the people closest to us so that such big parts of our lives aren’t hidden away.”

Robin nods, the smallest smile forming on his lips, and Killian didn’t quite realize how much he wanted Robin’s approval until he got it. Not getting it wouldn’t change things, but Robin has been one of his best mates for a decade, has been through so many of his highs and lows, and he wants Robin to be happy for him. He wants to be able to talk through everything with Robin the way that Robin has with him.

“That makes sense. I mean, yeah,” Robin chuckles, leaving back and messing with his shirt. “I knew you always fancied her, especially lately, but it makes sense with how often I’ve seen the two of you chatting on the plane or at breakfast. I didn’t think anything of it, just figured that she was looking for a friend since the woman who used to be go on road trips with her isn’t around that often. Huh, you’re dating again.”

“Does that surprise you?”

“Only a little. You were so messed up after Milah and all of the women that came after her that I didn’t really think you’d ever seriously date someone again. I kind of thought that you and I would end up as eternal bachelors and live life vicariously through Roland.”

Killian barks out a laugh, one that he really shouldn’t at how depressing that thought honestly is, but leave it to Robin to make him laugh like that. It’s something that comes with knowing someone for so damn long, and Killian is thankful for it.

“Do you think Roland will take care of us in our old age? I’m not sure that he will.”

“He’ll take care of you,” Robin laughs, “because you never have to tell him no. He’s going to harbor the fact that I didn’t let him have dessert last night forever.”

“Yeah, you’re definitely not getting chocolate pudding when you’re old and it’s all you can eat.”

Robin rolls his eyes, but the smile is still there. The smile is still on Killian’s face too. “I’m happy for you, mate. I kind of think you’re both batshit crazy for getting involved with each other when there’s so much that could go wrong, but happiness looks good on you.”

“Thanks. I don’t – she’s great, Rob. Bloody fantastic. I mean, I know that you know her and get to see her kick ass at her job every day, but outside of work too…she’s amazing.”

“I know.”

-/-

After the game, Killian manages to pull Will, Eric, and Ariel aside into one of the offices outside the locker room to tell them, finally hitting three birds with one stone, which is a pretty morbid saying now that he thinks about. Their hitting coach looks through the glass of the window when Ariel lets out a scream at his words, and Killian can do nothing but shake his head. It’s like he’s announcing the most exciting thing to ever happen to him every time he tells someone, and as much as he knew that his friends were invested in his dating life – or lack thereof – he didn’t know it was like this.

They all very obviously need to get a life.

-/-

“Oh my gosh,” Emma groans, slamming the passenger side door to his car closed as she slides onto the leather seat and adjusts her bag in her lap before dropping it to the ground, “I’d never make it as a spy. There were approximately a million people who were walking this way that knew me or you or were a member of the press. I swear, babe, it was impossible to get over here. I could have gotten to your brother’s house faster had I taken the trains, even with how packed they are right now.” She takes a breath and leans over to press her lips to his cheeks. “Hi. Thank you for waiting on me.”

“Well, I wasn’t exactly going to leave without you, Swan. How was work?”

“You know,” she teases, rolling her eyes a bit at his question, “it was good. Did you know that the Yankees won today and that they’re leading their league? And things like that tend to make players very happy to talk to me. Do you know who else was very happy to talk to me?”

“Who, love?” he asks as he presses his foot down on the gas and hits the ignition button to start the car.

“Ariel Fisher. That’s another reason why I’m late. I was attacked by a tiny, very loud, red-headed woman giving me a hug that I swear squeezed the life out of me. I’m not entirely sure what she said to me since there was a certain lack of air circulation going on in my brain, but I’m pretty sure she said she was super happy for me and then tried to adopt me or something like that.”

Killian chuckles, unable to help himself, before he leans back into his seat and rests his cheek against the headrest so that he can look at Emma. She looks so happy today, her hair pulled back in a high ponytail to keep it off her neck since he knows that when she sweatssweatsshe hates the way it tangles at the back of her neck. He also knows that she spent an hour picking out a dress to wear today because she’s coming with him to his brother’s townhome for Sunday night dinner and is a little nervous. She claims that she is simply indecisive about what to wear all the time, but he knows that isn’t true. Ruby, who he still hasn’t officially met but who he’s going to meet when he’s subjected to his own family dinner (interrogation), finally helped her out by tossing an orange dress that falls beneath her knees and curves around Emma’s breasts at her and telling her they were leaving the apartment in an hour.

Ruby is a force of nature.

And he is very much distracted by the swell of Emma’s breasts right now and the way he can see the freckle that resides on the inside of her right one. Always so distracting.

“Yeah,” Killian sighs, reaching up to scratch behind his ear, “I have now officially told everyone I deemed worth of knowing that you are my girlfriend, and despite Ariel’s several squeals over the whole thing, everyone is going to keep it quiet. At least to the outside world. I fully expect them to be a little too invasive with us from time to time.”

“Really?” Emma drones sarcastically, shifting her legs underneath the dash to cross one over the other so that the material shows the skin just above her knee. “I didn’t expect that at all with Will asking me if I was going to be your plus one for his wedding. Belle apparently needs to know for the seating arrangements. Or Ariel asking if we’d be willing to go on a couple’s vacation for the New Year.”

“I can believe both of those things happened.”

“As you should because they are true statements, twenty-nine.” Emma sighs back into the seat, turning away from facing him and looking out at the gray block that is the parking garage. “How’d Robin take it?”

“I’ll tell you on the way to Liam’s, yeah? If there’s one thing you need to know about the Jones family, it’s that we like to be on time, and we, my darling, are running late.”

“Liam will just have to get used to it like you have.”

Killian laughs as he puts his car in drive and makes his way out of the parking garage, filling in all of the details about his conversation with Robin as well as his with Will, Eric, and Ariel. Honestly, it feels like this is all they’ve talked about in the past week since Emma finally took the leap and told her family. She was pretty quiet about it all, not surprisingly, and slowly but surely he managed to drag some information out of her besides the fact that Ruby had figured it out because Emma was wearing his sweatshirt – which he still hasn’t gotten back – and that David had kind of caused her to freak out about things. He doesn’t love the thought of Emma getting into a panic about their relationship, but there are definitely things for them to always think about and consider. That’s not going to change.

Liam had said the same thing to him when he told him. He’d been full of questions, that obnoxious protective older brother gene coming to life. It doesn’t matter that Killian is twenty-eight years old and very much has control of his own life. Liam is always going to be that way, no matter how much Killian asks him not to be. It stems from Liam being both his brother and his father for a lot of his life. Liam was the one who was there to help him apply to colleges, to help him get recruiters to watch his games. His father had been the one who was obsessed with baseball, but his brother was the one who helped him achieve his dreams. And Liam had been the one who was by his side when he got drafted, when he worked his way up from the minors, when he pitched his first ball in Yankee stadium.

On top of all of that, Liam had been the one who was there when Killian and Milah broke up. That had been a disaster among disasters, and it’s probably exactly the reason why Liam pretty much had some kind of heart attack when Killian told him that he’d been dating someone in secret again. It had never occurred to Killian, not until he was sitting down across the kitchen table from Liam, that there were similarities even if the situations and circumstances and reasonings are different. Milah had asked him to be private about their relationship because of her marriage, not that he knew that at first, and he, the cocky guy that he was, thought that it was because she didn’t want the attention that would have come from being with him. In reality, no one but die-hard baseball fans cared about him, and he was fooling himself into thinking the things that he thought.

He was an idiot.

Still is sometimes.

How did he not realize that Liam might be truly upset about it all, that keeping such a big part of his life away from his best friend in the entire world would cause some sting? How did he not think through the fact that Liam, even though he’s often teased Killian about Emma and genuinely likes her, would worry about something similar happening here even though it is entirely different?

And now, after the accident, after all of the guilt and fear and worry that came with that, Liam focuses so much on Killian and how his life is going so that this would impact things.

It had been a long, stilted conversation, one that made Killian’s head pound, and thank goodness for Elsa to break things up and to understand and to help Liam calm down and see things the way that he should have seen things. And while it was Elsa who insisted that Killian bring Emma to Sunday dinner, he knows that Liam is more or so accepting of it all and will not be an ass to Emma.

That was agreed upon beforehand. Killian felt that was necessary, and while Emma told him that it was fine, that this is how David is going to be despite her best efforts, it’s very much not fine for anyone to be an ass to Emma simply because she is dating him.

Or at all.

So, maybe he’s a little nervous for this dinner, but that’s nothing compares to the way that Emma’s leg is shaking underneath the touch of his palm resting there.

“This is a nice neighborhood,” Emma says as he turns onto Liam’s street. “I don’t think I’ve ever been over here.”

“I can’t imagine you’ve ever had reason to unless you were randomly walking down the streets in front of these families’ homes.”

“I am pretty weird. I might have been.”

He glances over at her and smiles, but Emma’s gaze is very much focused on the street in front of her. Squeezing her thigh to silently reassure her, Killian moves his hand off of Emma back to the wheel so that he can turn into Liam’s garage, rolling down the window to type in the code so that the door will open for the two of them.

“Are you sure you don’t want to go get dinner somewhere else?” Emma worries, her voice visibly shaky. “I’m sure we can go find, like, one of those really good Mexican places that looks like it should be shut down for health codes but actually has the best queso dip you’ve ever eaten. No one will recognize us. I’m sure of it.”

“Swan,” Killian chuckles, driving into the garage and putting his car in park before turning to look at Emma, reaching up to cup her cheeks with his palms and run his thumbs underneath her eyes, “it is fine. They, unlike me, do not bite.”

“You are ridiculous. Why would you even say that?”

“To make you laugh.” He leans forward and playfully nips at her lips before tucking a loose strand from her ponytail behind her ear. “You are going to be fine. They’re just people, most of who you have met before, and if all else fails, you’ll have Addy and Lucy to be a buffer.”

“If you freak out when you have to meet all of my people, I’m going to say the exact same things about you, so just think about that with every word you use to calm me down.”

“That’s a lot of pressure.”

“So is this.”

Killian hums before gently kissing Emma and taking his time to move his lips of her, breathing in the smell of her perfume and her hairspray and maybe the tiniest bit of sweat. He needs to calm down too, to take a breath, and tell himself the same things that he’s been telling Emma.

“I love you,” he says when he pulls back, still reveling in the fact that he can say those words to her after feeling them for so long.

“I love you too. Last chance on the Mexican thing.”

His eyes roll, but he laughs all the same, briefly kissing her once more before leaning over her to open her car door. “Funnily enough, that’s what we’re having for dinner tonight. It’s a family favorite.”

“I’m pretty sure you’re lying to me, and if you are, I am stealing your car and driving it to my apartment, where it will inevitably get towed.”

“Whatever you say, darling.”

Killian opens his own door and gets out of the car before walking to Emma’s side and waiting for her as she adjusts her dress and messes with her hair in the reflection window. She’s still hesitant, which he imagines will stop when she gets inside and actually gets into conversation, so he places his hand on the small of her back and guides her up the stairs until they’re entering the kitchen and coming face-to-face with Anna.

Probably not the easiest way to ease Emma into things.

“Oh my gosh,” Anna squeals before putting her glass down, “you’re Emma.”

Emma stills beside him, and he rubs his hand up and down her back before squeezing her ass simply because he knows that it’ll make her focus on something other than her nerves. Sure enough, she jumps, looking up at him with a wry smile on her face and a playful roll of her eyes before looking back to Anna.

“That’s me,” Emma laughs, stepping away from him to move forward to shake Anna’s hand only for Anna to wrap Emma in a hug that is so tight that Killian swears he can feel it in his own legs. “It’s nice to meet you, Anna.”

“Oh, it’s so nice to meet you. I’ve heard so much about you. Well, not really, but a good amount. Mostly from Elsa. I followed you on Instagram. You might not have noticed that. You are just so pretty and I’m sure sweet, and I have no idea what you’re doing with Killian.”

“Hey,” he scoffs, pressing his lips together. He was going to laugh at how Anna rambles until she got to that end part, “why is everyone always saying things like that? I happen to think I’m a catch.”

“Well, you are, but only if people don’t know you that well,” Anna teases, releasing Emma and walking toward him so that she can hug him and whisper in his ear, “I’m kidding. She’s so pretty, Killian.”

“I know,” he sighs into Anna’s cheek. “She can probably hear us.”

“Oh, I’m totally not listening or anything,” Emma teases.

Anna laughs and pulls back before stepping over to Emma and grabbing onto her arm. “Come on, everyone is in the living room, and they need to know that you’re here. And I want to hear all about you. Your job is awesome, obviously, but a girl has seriously got to know why Killian loves you so much. I don’t even know if you guys have said those words to each other yet, but I can tell. He’s got that sparkle in his eyes.”

“You know,” Emma chuckles, looking back at him with a smile on her face, “you and my sister-in-law would get along really well.”

“Then I have to meet her too.”

Killian follows Anna and Emma around the corner and into the living room where Liam, Elsa, and Kris are all sitting on the couches while Addy and Lucy are watching television. The moment they walk in the room, though, Addy turns her head and runs toward Emma, grabbing onto her waist and talking about just how excited she is to see Emma. Lucy is right behind her, and even though she’s more reserved, she hugs Emma too, letting Emma pick her up and rest her on her hip while everyone else greets Emma. She’s very quickly learning that his family are all huggers, and man does he hope that they’re not overwhelming her. He’d very much like for her to want to continue to date him after this.

Damn. Why is he thinking thoughts like that? That is not the kind of headspace that he needs to be in while Emma is talking to Liam, Lucy still sitting on her hip.

He kind of just threw her into the lion’s den, didn’t he?

But it’s good, he thinks. The conversation flows, there aren’t any awkward silences, and most importantly, there aren’t any interrogations.

“Do you need help with dinner?” Emma asks Elsa later when they’ve moved from the living room to the kitchen so that Elsa and Liam can start dinner, which, much to Emma’s delight, truly is good Mexican food.

“No,” Elsa sighs, waving Emma away as she chops up a bell pepper, “you’re a guest. You don’t cook. Killian, can you grate some cheese?”

He finishes taking a sip of his beer before putting it down. “What happened to guests not cooking?”

“You are family. That’s different.”

“That’s bullocks.”

“You love to cook,” Emma says as she knocks her knee into his. “I’m pretty sure you can handle grating some cheese.”

“He’s pretty incompetent. You’d be surprised at how little my little brother can actually do.”

“Younger. My gosh it’s younger,” Killian groans to Liam. He did that just to annoy Killian, the bastard. “Is that ever going to stop?”

“Maybe when you’re thirty.” Liam hands him a bowl, the cheese grater, and two blocks of cheese, before going back to getting ground beef out of the fridge. “So, Emma, how’d you get into baseball?”

Liam is definitely subtle in his ways of interrogation, but Killian picks up on it. Emma too.

“Watching it or working in it?”

“Working.”

“My brother is a lot older than me and has been working at ESPN pretty much since I’ve known him, and he helped get me an internship in college. It just kind of built from there, you know? I mostly was a stat checker and then got to write some articles, but then when they started covering the games on TV more and developed their streaming service, the job as an on-air reporter opened up. And yeah, here I am.”

“What do you mean your brother has been working there since you’ve known him?”

“Liam,” Killian warns, narrowing his eyes at his brother.

“It’s fine,” Emma promises him before placing her hand on his back and rubbing up and down. “I didn’t have parents, so I was in the foster system for my entire life. My last house, well, I grew close to them, and they’re pretty much my family. David is my foster mom’s biological son, and he’s pretty much fallen into that older brother role. You two are very alike.”

“Stubborn and far too invasive?” Elsa teases, looking behind her at Liam and winking.

“I am neither of those things.”

“You definitely are,” Killian and Elsa say at the same time, and Liam simply grumbles in response before placing the beef in the pan.

“Are Anna and Kris okay with the kids?” Emma wonders aloud, twisting her head around to look into the living room where Anna and Kris volunteered to watch a movie with them while dinner is being cooked. “I can watch them. I don’t want to interrupt your tradition of family dinners or whatever since I am kind of an intruder.”

“You are a breath of fresh air is what you are,” Elsa says, smiling at Emma before she takes the cheese out of his hands like he wasn’t just doing a bang-up job himself. “I thought you were the sweetest thing at Addy’s party, and when I realized that you two were dating, or at least had feelings for each other, I felt like all of those six-year-olds hyped up on sugar. I’m glad Killian has someone kind like you.” “You think she’s bloody kind, but she’s actually pretty mean to me.” Emma slaps the back of his head, and he starts laughing at the affronted look on her face. “See. She just slapped me.”

“Shut up.”

“Really mature, love.”

“You know that I’m not.”

“No, but you do some pretty mature things, if you know what I mean.”

“Killian,” she gasps, slapping him again, “that was a horrible innuendo.”

He arches a brow. “That’s what you’re insulted by? Not the fact that I alluded to our sex life but that I did it in a non-creative way?”

Emma shrugs. “Pretty much.”

“Els,” Liam groans, “I don’t think I can handle Killian dating again. It’s too nauseating.”

“Asshole,” Killian mumbles at Liam, flicking a piece of cheese at him.

“You’re really not very creative with your innuendos or insults today, Professor Jones. You should work on that.”

“And you,” Killian points out as his eyes roll at the nickname, “have got to stop talking to Scarlet if you’re going to call me things like that.”

Once dinner is ready, they all settle down in the dining room, the kitchen table not big enough to fit everyone, but just like the rest of the afternoon, everything goes smoothly. Liam is definitely peppering in questions and little comments, but it’s all in the good nature of getting to know Emma. Honestly, though, no one gets a word in for how much Emma, Anna, and Elsa are getting along. Emma is very obviously a big hit with the two of them as well as Addy and Lucy (and Kris and Liam even if they’re a little less vocal about it), and it makes his heart swell. Admittedly, he was kind of nervous about all of this, if only because his family and their approval is so important to him, but there’s no way they could ever not like Emma.

Maybe be a little dubious at first, but dislike? No.

He can only hope that it’s the same with her family since he knows that mixing lives doesn’t usually run so smoothly, even if this is only her second meeting with everyone.

Emma’s nerves seem to have faded away the longer they stay, and when he pulls her to the side after dinner and offers to take her back to his place, she shakes her head and says that she’s good to stay and watch a movie with his family. So they all settle down into the living room, and while everyone takes their normal spots, their routines obviously very engrained in their minds, Killian moves to the large lounge chair that’s in the corner, pulling Emma down on top of him and wrapping his arms around her waist so that Emma doesn’t have to sit across the room from him.

Maybe that’s a little bit for himself too.

Okay, it definitely is, and he dips his head down to kiss the back of Emma’s neck as she pulls a blanket up to cover their laps while Liam turns the lights off.

“I really like your family,” Emma whispers as she presses her cheek against his and squeezes his hands. “I’m glad you have them.”

“Yeah, love, me too. You seem to be a very big hit today.”

“It’s because I’m so charming.”

Killian chuckles into her cheek, pressing a kiss there. “Exactly.”

“Uncle Killian,” Addison groans, “Daddy says to stop kissing your girlfriend and pay attention to the movie.”

#catch me if you can #cs fic #cs ff #captain swan fic #captain swan

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searchingwardrobes · 5 years

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Natural Opposite: Re-post of 1/16

Tumblr deleted the first four chapters of my CSBB, so I’m reblogging them. If you reblogged the first time, I would appreciate it if you reblogged again. I can’t remember what I said when I posted this originally. I think I gushed about how much I love everyone in the CSBB and how rewarding it was. I hope I gave my beta @distant-rose love for this chapter in particular because it wouldn’t be what it is without her. Thank you for pushing me, Ro, and I’m sorry if I kicked and screamed a little bit!

Gorgeous banner above was made by the amazing @optomisticgirl who deserves all the good things for her amazing talent. She was also a huge fan of this story, for which I’m grateful.

Summary: Dance is more than Emma Swan’s career; it’s practically saved her life on more than one occasion. But when it comes to reality TV shows, she’s always danced in the shadows of her twin brother David and her sister Elsa. Her first season as a pro on Dancing With the Stars was a disaster, and she enters her second season determined to prove herself. All she needs is a good partner. Hollywood bad boy and ladies’ man Killian Jones isn’t what she had in mind.

Rating: M for mature themes, steamy dance routines, and sexy times (But NOT smut)

Trigger warnings: discussions of online solicitation of a minor, bullying, statutory rape, and emotionally abusive/controlling relationships; stalking; anti-Rumbelle, anti-Neal

Can also be read on Ao3

Tagging: (let me know if you want to be added to my tag list) @snowbellewells @kmomof4 @jennjenn615 @kday426 @bethacaciakay @teamhook @whimsicallyenchantedrose @snidgetsafan @delirious-latenight-laughs @winterbaby89 @followbatb @onceuponaprincessworld @hollyethecurious @ohmakemeahercules @wellhellotragic @sambethe

Natural opposite: a movement in ballroom dancing which corresponds directly and naturally to that of your partner

Chapter One: Jar of Hearts

Emma Swan pushed her long blonde hair over one shoulder and reached around to hook the clasp on her bra. The man lying in bed next to her reached out his hand, his fingers lightly touching her arm.

“There’s no hurry,” he said huskily, shifting closer to ghost his lips over her bare shoulder.

She looked through her curtain of sex-mussed hair to take in his dazzling smile. It was his best feature, the first to draw her attention at the bar. Second only to the long, dark lashes that framed his amber eyes. Emma said nothing in reply, merely snatching her little red dress off the floor and shimmying into it.

“Help me with the zipper?”

He merely pouted at her, making quite the picture with his chiseled muscles across his smooth, mahogany skin. An errant dark curl fell over his forehead, another feature she had admired at the bar, though then his tight curls had been styled and tamed. He looked really good post-coital, too good. Emma looked away, contorting her arms to reach the damn zipper herself.

“I’m beginning to think I’m just a one-night stand.”

Emma grabbed her shoes and purse, tossing him a flippant grin. “You catch on quick.”

Despite the tinge of hurt in his voice, she was determined to remain nonchalant. Part of her was inwardly cursing herself for not putting the breaks on the whole thing earlier. There had been warning signs: the way he kept wanting to talk, the way he seemed slightly dazed by her brazenness. She had a sinking suspicion that this was a first for him. Not the sex, God no, obviously not, but she would guess he was normally a third date kind of guy.

She was proved correct when she headed for the door. He ran to intercept her, holding his hands up in a pleading gesture as he blocked her way out. Emma took a reflexive step backward.

“Come on, baby, stay. We’ll get room service.”

Emma flinched as he reached out to stroke her hair, and her heart rate doubled. “I’m no one’s baby,” she snapped as she pushed her way past him and out the door.

Her legs wobbled as she hurried down the hotel corridor, and her hands shook as she hit the elevator button. Come on, come on! She tried to push away the fear that he would come after her, telling herself it was irrational. Finally, the doors opened, and Emma rushed in, not letting out a sigh of relief until she had pushed the button for her floor and the elevator started moving. She backed into the corner, her breaths coming rapidly. When the door pinged open, she knew sleep wasn’t what she needed. What she needed to do was grab her dance bag and head downstairs to the ballroom.

*********************************************************

Emma always felt more free here, the portable wood dance floor they took on the road cool beneath her bare feet. Especially in the silence of the empty ballroom, the dance and the music could allow her to feel things, express things that she normally couldn’t. Christina Perri’s “Jar of Hearts” played from the iPod hooked up to the speakers in the corner. She spun across the floor, arms reaching, torso contracting, blonde hair whipping.

As the strains of the music slowed then disappeared, she leaned against the far wall. This ballroom had been reserved as rehearsal space for the cast of Dancing With the Stars. Right now it was empty, and the brass chandelier overhead was dark. It took her a minute to remember what city she was in . . . Seattle, that was it. Later that day, the bus would take them to San Francisco, the last stop on the tour.

Emma’s chest heaved with emotion rather than exertion, and she pushed her messy hair out of her face. She always danced with almost desperate movements to that song. Instead of dwelling on the reasons for that, she marched over to her dance bag and grabbed a towel for her sweaty face and neck.

Emma took a swig from her water bottle, shouldered her bag, and turned to head back to her room. She let out a gasp when she saw a broad shouldered figure blocking the exit.

“Shit, David!” she yelped, her hand going to her heart. “You just took ten years off my life!”

As her twin brother stepped closer, Emma could see the worried lines on his face. “It’s three in the morning, and you weren’t in your room.”

Emma rolled her eyes as she brushed past him. “And evidently neither were you.”

“I saw you go upstairs with that guy.” He kept pace easily beside her as she strode quickly down the hallway.

She snorted a laugh. “And what were you planning on doing? Banging on every door in the place until you found me?”

David slug an arm around her and pulled her close. “Maybe,” he teased.

Emma turned to him when they reached the elevator, batting her lashes exaggeratedly and clasping her hands beneath her chin. “My Prince Charming!”

David leaned against the wall, arms crossed, face sincere. “I figured you would be here, though. Dance therapy? Did that guy -”

“No,” Emma cut him off with a raised hand as she jabbed the elevator button, “he was nice, actually.”

“Mary Margaret thought so, too,” David admitted.

Emma ignored the comment as the elevator doors slid open. David’s celebrity dance partner and now fiance had tried to make a double date out of the guy, and Emma had to resort to drastic measures before she ruined everything by getting the guy to share things.

“Yeah, tell Mary Margaret I’m sorry about her dress. I’ll pay for the dry cleaning.”

They fell silent as the elevator ascended. David was looking at her with that concerned, fatherly look on his face. She stared at the numbers lighting up over the door rather than meet his gaze.

“So if he was nice, did you get his number?”

“David,” Emma groaned, casting her gaze to the ceiling.

“No, Emma,” he continued, and she knew by his tone that he was speaking his mind whether she wanted to hear it or not, “I want to know why you live like a nun in LA, but then on tour, you . . . . you . . . “

“I what?” Emma snapped. “Act my age? I’m twenty-eight with a ten year old kid, so forgive me if I let myself have a little fun for a change.”

The elevator doors opened, but David didn’t move. “Fun? So that’s why you were down there dancing your feelings?”

Emma crossed her arms protectively around herself and jerked her chin. “I believe this is your floor.”

David deflated and stepped off, glancing back at her with a concerned expression as the doors slid shut. Emma however, kept her stiff posture and stoic expression as the elevator rose to the next floor. She kept it as she walked down the quiet hall to her room. Only when the door shut behind her did she allow herself to sink to the floor. She was a ballroom dancer, after all. She knew how to stay in character.

*******************************************************

Emma tapped her fingers on her steering wheel as her car made its way slowly in the carpool line at Henry’s school. Part of her felt pretentious about putting him in a private school, especially one like this that was famous for its celebrity alums. But it was diverse and urban, it gave out loads of scholarships, and it was extremely close to the ABC backlot. Plus, getting in wasn’t easy and not because you had to drop names or money. The school was notorious for rejecting kids with impressive last names. No, it was hard to get into because you had to be crazy smart.

Emma smiled as she recognized Henry in the sea of plaid streaming across the front courtyard of the school. Yes, her kid was smart. She didn’t care if she sounded like an obnoxious, bragging mom. She was proud of him, and that was why she didn’t mind writing that hefty check each month. Of course, his academic scholarship also helped.

“Hey, mom,” he told her as he hopped into her car.

“You sound happy,” she observed as she pulled out of the parking lot and into LA traffic, “did that math test go well?”

Henry instantly scowled. “I got a B minus!”

“Oh no, a B minus!” Emma teased. “How will you ever survive the horror?”

“Ha, ha, very funny. As hard as I studied, I should have gotten an A!” he retorted, crossing his arms in a huff.

“Sorry kid,” Emma told him with a shrug, “I just didn’t give you the math gene. I have to use a calculator to figure out tips.” They both laughed, and Emma gave her son a pointed look. “So what’s with the good mood? Is this about that girl Ava I saw you walking out with?”

Henry wrinkled his nose. “Ew, Mom, gross! You know what today is!”

Emma cocked her head and feigned ignorance. “Today? What’s special about today?”

Now it was Henry’s turn to roll his eyes. “Yeah right, like you don’t know. Tomorrow you’ll be crying when I have to get on the bus.”

He was teasing, but she did miss driving him to and from school once the show started filming. She may not cry like the day he started kindergarten, but there was an ache to her heart over it.

“Oh, that,” she chuckled, “so what flavor are we getting?”

“Rocky road, definitely.”

Emma nodded an emphatic agreement as she pulled into their favorite ice cream place. They would both get a waffle cone that was way too big, then get a pint to take home. Her siblings said she had the appetite of a fourteen year old. She was lucky she had a high metabolism and a career that burned tons of calories. She and Henry were also both lucky that her older sister Elsa lived with them. She seemed to think Emma would be lost without her, and even though it sometimes drove Emma crazy, nutritionally speaking, Elsa was probably right. Without her cooking for them on a regular basis, Emma and Henry would probably be living on grilled cheese and onion rings. Except for breakfast. Emma could make some mean scrambled eggs and pancakes. Pancakes from a box, maybe, but still.

Emma felt the last vestiges of stress from the summer tour roll off her as she licked at her waffle cone and listened to Henry tell her enthusiastically all about his day. Emma’s little unconventional family was why she danced. Dance brought her and David to Ingrid, Elsa, and Anna. It gave them a family. And now, it helped Emma provide for her son while still doing something she loved.

*************************************************************

Emma pressed the button on the side of her cell phone to lock the screen with unnecessary force, then swore under her breath in frustration as she crammed it into her silver clutch.

“ Regina still hasn’t contacted you yet?” Elsa asked sympathetically.

Emma looked up to see her sister standing in the doorway of her bedroom. She was wearing a lavender bridesmaid’s dress identical to the one Emma was wearing.

“No,” Emma replied, frustration coloring her words, “and I don’t understand the delay. I mean, every other pro knows who they’ve been paired with!”

“Maybe that’s a good thing,” Elsa mused with a shrug as she stepped out into the hallway of the three bedroom apartment. “I mean, we don’t really have a huge name on the roster so far.”

“You don’t think Ursula Neptune is a huge name?”

Elsa seemed to think about it as she tossed lipstick into a tiny drawstring purse. “Well, yes and no. Yes, she is a legend in R&B music. But she’s older. And older celebs have a limited fan base.”

Emma snorted. “Tell me about it.”

Last season had been Emma’s first as a pro dancer. She had spent two seasons on the show performing in the troupe, and then finally last season she was made an official pro cast member. But she and her partner, a washed up 51 year old character actor, had been voted off in the first elimination round. To say Emma had lacked chemistry with Leroy was an understatement. The tension between them could have been cut with a knife, and Emma called him Grumpy in private.

“What about David’s partner, Violet Clemens?”

Elsa shook her head as she added a tiny pack of tissues to her bag. “She’s a Disney Channel star and only fifteen. The older viewers won’t have a clue who she is.”

David, Emma’s twin brother, had found his way onto DWTS the same way his sisters had; through that other dancing show, So You Think You Can Dance. Unlike Emma and Elsa, he had won the entire thing and was still the only ballroom dancer to do so. Two seasons later, Emma and Elsa auditioned. Their similar names and appearance combined with their deep friendship had made them viewer favorites from the beginning. When the judges chose the top ten girls, they brought Emma and Elsa in together, leading them and the viewers at home to assume the pair would be separated. Emma would never forget her pounding heart as she gripped Elsa’s hand. The head judge had told Elsa she was in the top ten first, and Emma had been shocked when her sister wept in sadness that Emma was going home. Then, of course, the judge had added with drama, “And . . . so is your sister!” Emma hadn’t known whether to punch the man or kiss him. In the end, they hadn’t lasted nearly as long as David, not even making the overall top ten in order to go on tour. But that ended up being a blessing in disguise because Dancing with the Stars wanted both of them, right away.

Yet they’d only wanted Emma in the troupe at first, and she wouldn’t lie, it stung. She got the feeling from Regina, the casting director, that Emma was seen as a liability. While her backstory – almost quitting dance at eighteen when she found herself pregnant with Henry – had gotten her votes on SYTYCD, it seemed to make the studio executives at DWTS doubt her professionalism. Just thinking about it made her grit her teeth. She would show them. This season, she would prove she deserved her spot.

If she got a half-decent partner, that is.

Emma straightened, pushing hair out of her face as she looked at Elsa’s reflection in the hall mirror. Her foster sister was putting on the faux diamond stud earrings that Mary Margaret had given as gifts to her bridesmaids. Emma already had her earrings on, her blonde hair swept up in a French twist identical to Elsa’s. She plopped down on the loveseat to wrestle on her strappy heels.

“I’m still worried. What if Regina’s having a hard time scrounging up a twelfth celebrity? If she’s having to scrape the bottom of the barrel, what kind of partner will I get stuck with this time?”

Elsa smiled reassuringly as she turned from the mirror to face Emma. “Anything will be better than last season, though, right?”

Emma huffed as she stood, trying not to roll her eyes at her sister. “Easy for you to say. You hit the jackpot with your partner. A marine who won the purple heart and runs a nonprofit for veterans? Nobody will even care how he dances; his back story will get him all the votes he needs.”

Elsa shrugged, a slightly smug expression on her face. She didn’t even try to argue. “And he’s pretty handsome, too. And his service dog is adorable. I keep having to remind myself that I can’t pet him.”

Emma raised her eyebrows in surprise. “He brings the dog to rehearsals?”

“Of course. PTSD is pretty serious. His therapy dog pretty much has to go with him everywhere.” Elsa’s eyes were narrowed, and her lips were set in a firm line as she spoke.

Emma started to ask why she was so defensive on the subject, but before she could say anything else, Henry appeared in the doorway of his room with a frustrated look on his face. He tugged on the tie around his neck, which was lopsided and knotted sloppily.

“Uncle David showed me how to do this,” he groused, “but I just can’t get the hang of it.”

Emma gave her son a soft smile. He looked so handsome and grown up in his little suit. How had ten years gone by so fast?

“Here, kid, let me help you out.”

Emma got surprisingly emotional as she fixed Henry’s tie. Not just because her son was growing up, but because her twin brother was getting married today. And the fact that he had asked her son to be his best man. He could have asked Kristoff, or his best friend Sean who had danced with all of them since they were little. But instead he had asked Henry. Emma blinked rapidly lest she start crying in earnest and ruin her mascara.

“There,” Emma said, voice thick as she ran her hands over the lapels of Henry’s suit jacket, “you’re all ready.”

“Okay, Swans!” Elsa announced as she grabbed the keys. “Time to get this show on the road!”

Emma laughed as she grabbed her clutch. Ingrid, their foster mother, used to always usher them out the door with the same expression. Performing wasn’t just the family’s hobby; it was their life.

“You know, Emma,” Elsa commented as they headed down the two flights of stairs to the car, “this could be the season you find love. Like David.”

Emma rolled her eyes as she climbed into the front passenger seat. “Highly unlikely considering I’m the last pro to be assigned a partner.”

“I think you’re reading way too much into the delay,” Elsa remarked as she backed the car out of its space.

Emma said nothing in reply, merely resting her chin in her hand as she gazed out the car window. Maybe her sister was right. Maybe Regina wasn’t plotting to stick her with the absolute worst partner. Yet that didn’t mean she’d find what David had with Mary Margaret. As a matter of fact, she could pretty much bet on it.

Because Emma Swan had risked her heart once, and she wasn’t about to make that mistake again.

*********************************************************

The wedding was beautiful. Not that Emma had expected anything less. Mary Margaret had been a vision as she practically floated down the aisle in a gown with a fitted bodice and a skirt that seemed to be made of the most delicate, pure white feathers. Her dark hair was curled and piled atop her head in a loose bun with tendrils falling to frame her face. She looked so different from the YouTube videos that had made her famous. In those, she had a pixie haircut and wore demure cardigans buttoned to the top button.

It was those videos that had changed Mary Margaret Blanchard’s life completely. They had started as a way for a third grade public school teacher to vent about the irritations and struggles in the American public school system. Eventually, it all led to an invitation to do Dancing With the Stars where she met the pro dancer who became the love of her life.

“Uncle David is really happy, isn’t he?”

Emma gave her head a slight shake at the sound of her son’s voice. She tore her eyes away from her brother and his new wife to gaze down at her son. “Yeah, kid, I’d say he is.”

Henry looked up at Emma with a wistful expression. “I want you to be that happy.”

Emma bit her lip, overcome with what a big heart this son of hers had. She cupped his face with her hands. “That’s sweet of you Henry, but I’m already happy. Because I have you.”

She pulled him close in a hug, brushing her lips across the top of his head. Just then she heard her cell phone buzz. She snatched up her clutch from the seat beside her and pulled out the phone.

“Mo-om,” Henry admonished, “you didn’t turn off your cell phone?”

“It was on vibrate,” Emma protested. The name on the screen made Emma’s stomach swoop: Regina. “Gotta take this, kid.”

“But the next dance is the best man and maid of honor!”

Emma held up a finger, to signal that she would only be a minute. Then she took a few steps away from the dance floor as she answered and pressed the phone to her ear. Emma’s brow furrowed in confusion as Regina spoke crisply and rapidly.

“I’m sorry,” Emma said with a shake of her head as she plugged her other ear, “it’s really loud. What did you say?”

Regina let out a long sigh which clearly conveyed that Emma was trying her patience. “I said be ready at 8 am sharp tomorrow morning. I’m sending a car to take you –“

Regina’s words were swallowed up by the cheers of the crowd as David and Mary Margaret finished their first dance.

“I’m sorry,” Emma asked again, “what was that?”

“To Comic-Con!” Regina practically shouted. “You’ll be meeting your partner at Comic-Con.”

“Well, don’t drag out the suspense,” Emma snapped back, rolling her eyes, “who is he?”

Emma could hear the smugness drip from Regina’s next words. “You’ll find out when you get there. And the best part is, the cameras will capture every second of it.”

#csbb #csbb fic #cs ff #csbb 2018 #dancing with the stars au #modern au #enemies to friends to lovers #natural opposite #searching wardrobes

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subdivisi0ns · 6 years

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tagged by the lovely @britneyshakespeare to answer these 10 questions & come up with 10 of my own. thank you !! 💗

psa i wrote way too much please don’t read this. just skip to the questions at the end if i tagged you

1. What are 3 songs that mean something to you, and what do they mean?

that’s hard because i don’t usually find personal meanings in songs. i’m a lot more interested in what the song means to the artist who wrote it. but let’s see if i can think of some

-um. after all by david bowie was always Highly Relatable. like. prattling on & on waxing philosophical only to suddenly realize everything i said is wrong and don’t hate me and also now i’m having an existential crisis and i shouldn’t have started talking in the first place? M e

-when i was first getting into rush i was a big fan of Self Isolating To Cope and also i had no friends and was proud of it (bc if i couldn’t find a way to take pride in my [perceivedly] unchangeable flaws my entire self image would come crashing to the ground and that just wasn’t a good time . anyway). so the lines “nothing can survive in a vacuum / no one can exist all alone” from turn the page pissed me off. but now! now i have loads of friends and i feel legitimately cared about and i feel like i can comfortably reciprocate that and now when i hear that song i think you know what neil? you’re goddamn right.

-uh i s’pose i relate to another brick in the wall pt 3 which is not a good thing but. i dunno i really love being angrily in denial of needing any help whatsoever along to this song. it’s my flaw-pride anthem (don’t worry i don’t take it literally. it’s just fun in the moment)

-shit i know this said three but the one person who i relate to EVERY FUCKING SONG he’s ever put out is bill wurtz. never have i felt so understood than when i listen to bill wurtz’s music. god it’s the most uncanny feeling, i really really understand it a lot

ok i have to stop thinking of more . turns out a lot have meaning to me ive spent like an hour on this question alone Moving On

2. What’s your ideal self like?

. this was The Worst question to ask me because i can and will ramble on for hours given the opportunity

well i’d be able to execute my ideas, for one. instead of just having a half-baked - quarter-baked - fleeting concept with no real idea of how to achieve it. more specifically i want to be able to write songs. more more specifically i want to be able to write the music aspect of songs. i can’t do it. i dont fuckin know why i just can’t. but if i could i think i just might be content with life.

but that doesn’t mean there aren’t still things to improve. i wish i was funnier. i like my weird brand of humor/abstractity online but that’s hard to replicate in real life. i wish i was better at thinking on the spot. i wish my memory didn’t only retain stuff when it feels like it. i wish i was better at putting my thoughts into words, more concisely and accurately and effectively.

um i wish i didnt have executive function issues. like i wanna just do stuff and not have it take all the energy out of me. wish i had the energy to do it to begin with. wish i could keep up with socializing and not ignore people for hours/days because i can’t get myself to maintain conversation.

ok clearly this is leading down an endless tunnel of what i’d change so . i’ll just say my ideal self is a successful musician with a good social life but also an element of mystery and intrigue. my ideal self is just david bowie

3. Who, of all your family members (immediate or extended), do you think has had the most influence on you, for better or for worse?

my mom for a lot (a looooooot) of reasons but if i go into it this is gonna push it over the line from a tag game into a therapy session (if i havent crossed that line already)

4. What’s your main outlet of expression?

writing. journalling. fuckin , social media. actually yeah that more than anything. my Self is on display here if you look at my tumblr(s) my twitter(s) and my instagram(s) you’ve got a pretty goddamn decent picture of who i am

5. What was the first album you ever bought for yourself?

uh i mean i listen to most stuff off of youtube if i don’t already have it so like,,? i dunno. does itunes count? the first vinyl i ever got was wish you were here (for forty fuckin bucks god) but i paid with my aunt’s money so does that even count. i don’t know.

6. Do you like to go shopping?

depends on a lot of things. lately i’ve been in the mood to just get out of the damn house whenever possible (love being a high school dropout !) so the answer is pretty much yes anytime. but it really depends.

7. Kind of cliche but, if you could have dinner with any person, living or dead, who would you pick?

i wanna be the fourth person at the dinner with rush table. just to observe. i’d be terrified to actually have a conversation with any of my idols. okay but if i had to get over that fear i guess i’d pick..... bowie? todd? i don’t know this is hard. alex lifeson circa 197something so he can take me back to his place afterwards you pickin up what im puttin down

8. What TV show do you watch when you’re feeling stressed or low and you need a quick feel-better fix?

i don’t watch tv like ever not even in this case but i guess full house

9. What was the last intriguing conversation you had about?

everything my girlfriend said to me today (edit: yesterday but i did this last night) was great everything my girlfriend’s ever said to me was great

oh that didn’t answer the question at all i just realized. uh they were telling me about the star wars prequels (which i have not seen) and earlier we were having a very analytical conversation about a particularly interesting rush photo

also me & @swanky-trash were discussing our plans to take down trump and all the rest of those bastards while wearing jareth from labyrinth costumes and eating mushrooms. because it’s our destiny as clones separated at birth. yknow just life stuff

10. What’s something about yourself that you don’t think comes across as painfully obvious online, but is, in fact, in person?

shit are we at the end already? damn. i was enjoying this (can you tell).

okay here’s another one i could go on for 12 years about. but uh. i probably come across as way more perky irl? like my voice is all high pitched and i talk really fast and smile and laugh at everything and i have a whatever the opposite of monotone is voice. i don’t like that. i try to combat it online with the all-lowercase typing and shortening of words and omission of punctuation and that sort of thing. i think it’s worked. also i may be terrible at typing but i am WAY worse at speaking. i’m scatterbrained as hell and if i seem at all interesting or witty online that all goes to shit irl. also i can’t fucking talk to people who i only know in person? it just doesn’t work. thank god i have you guys

haaaa okay sorry for the rambling here are the questions

1. what’s the best day/one of the best days you’ve ever had?

2. how important is your social media presence to you?

3. what achievement are you proudest of?

4. describe your sense of humor.

5. is there anything you’re good at or like to do that people who don’t know you well probably wouldn’t expect?

6. what’s your most interesting family story?

7. favorite color palette?

8. what’s something that would be very “out of character” for you to do?

9. yknow that thing on twitter that’s like “pick 1 & rt for good luck” and the options are good grades, meet your idol, money, or crush texts you? which one would/did you pick and why?

10. what’s a song you either wish you’d written or feel like you could’ve written?

i tag @thetemplesofrush @thumbnailoak3 @swanky-trash @lavender-layne @realalexlifeson @davies-jones @goallines-and-musicrhymes @fruitthemed @graveyarding @cosmikdebris99 and anyone else who wants to do it and dont feel pressured to do it etc etc god i hope none of you actually read this whole thing i am so sorry

#diana i loved your questions esp the last one that was a good one #long post

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icharchivist · 7 years

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(bodyguard anon) yeah, Kurapika was pretty neutral/unhappy around the Nostrades but you also have to remember that he didn't like them from the beginning because they're black market body collectors people that Kurapika specifically despises because of his own trauma and they're just scum to him in general. He's much gentler with the queen in comparison b/c she's not doing anything bad. That's why I said imagine you were a business official not a mafia member hehe. Also don't worry (1/2)

yeah tumblr crashed on me. (2/2) basically you know don't feel like it's a self pity party liek your tags say because the beauty of fictional characters is that they aren't real. As someone who also likes Kurapika a lot like sometimes I imagine him being way more romantic [towards me] then he probably ever would be in canon. But like again he's not real and it's not harming anyone b/c it's your own personal thing so like y'know don't worry about it feeling very ooc or dumb!

Aahh thanks for sending it to me again!

Heyy :D

But ye that’s true :’D I guess it’s just that we saw him more with the Nostrade and, with the Queen well, he is still distant, even if he’s gentler, and it’s the circumstances that makes him as gentle as we saw those last few chapters. But I guess you’re right, , he wouldn’t be too bad either, esp if the person isn’t a criminal of any sort :’D

And that’s true, and tbh that’s always why i always like fictional characters this much, and that’s true that’s also the beauty of thinking about all of it. That’s not exactly what I meant though by self-pity party though, but that’s the fault of my wording sorry dfkjhdkf It’s especially that, on some levels, well - i have a lot of unhealthy coping mechanism and insecurities as well that would probably drive Kurapika nuts, or, since some of them are similar to his, it would be very awkward very quick. I’m kinda always thinking about bad stuff when i’m not distracting myself, which is something that is easy to catch on when I spend a lot of time with someone, especially with like, the health issues in general.

What I meant I think is that, I don’t really have this idealized version of myself in my mind and not enough self esteem to work through this. When I get really “self inserty”, it’s either extremely indulgent and leaning toward basically coping on all the bad stuff, or it is with a sort of oc that is still heavily different from myself. (that’s the stuff I end up thinking of when I play games with romances when I create my own character for exemple, even if i try to stay as close as myself as possible, i still take the story the game set up for me ahah).

That’s kinda awkward to mention djkfh but i completely agree with you though. And this is one of the beauty of fiction, to be able to picture yourself among them and getting to know them, even if you change a few things around and get self indulgent. That’s actually really good at time! I completely agree with you and that’s really good.

I just personally hardly imagine myself in those scenarios without somehow working a therapy all around it xD The more distanced I am from those fantasies the more fun I get. But that’s just me, really.

lkjkljlkdjf very awkward reply sorry, i’ll get there one day maybe! That’s always nice to picture after all.

And I really hope that you manage to get a lot out of said fantasies. I’m happy to know it’s working for you especially!

Take care!

#hfjkdhfd this reply is a mess sorry #but anyway skjhfdf #honestly if in some miracle i meet my fav fav characters i'd just be like trying to hug them and want them to get better #and thank them for just helping me cope in general xD #but if i get too self indulgent i'd just be rambling again about the stuff that turns round and round in my head #and that's not the most pleasant thing to read #and that's what i meant by selfpity party i don't want to turn a fun setup into something... far less fun #dkjhfdkjfh #sorry #but thanks for the message though it's honestly so so sweet <3 #take care!#Anonymous #ichareply

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lovehaswonangelnumbers · 5 years

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New Post has been published on https://lovehaswonangelnumbers.org/chiron-retrogradeheart-openings/

Chiron Retrograde~Heart Openings

By A Gift From Gaia

Waking up this morning and my nervous system was on high alert as I settled back into my physical after a night of travels and sharing.

A normal morning, it’s how I am guided to write and share the energetic navigation reports, but this morning was oh so much more intense, as though every nerve through my head, down my shoulders and into my arms were moving and feeling in ways I simply didn’t want to, crawling sensations.

This is how my body responds so I can write and this is also why when it comes to energy reports we must wait and see what the codes tell us, otherwise we are just reporting from a mind space and not the Soul Space, the heart.

Today Chiron stations direct and moves into retrograde tomorrow. How much of this you feel, or can pick out the individual stream of Chiron will depend on how much interest you have paid to the Centurion who serves your healing process.

Chiron has been one of my most favourite to understand and align with. The energy is direct, it holds purpose and it’s precise, no messing.

It is the wounding but is equally the healer

Which gives us a wide view of our path, knowing that whatever is now occuring is in a space of healing, it is being taken through a process which means in a quantum world that once you have begun you have already completed and expanded…how long that takes to be experienced in the physical just depends on how committed to the path of light that you are on.

Mars conjuncting Mercury newly in retrograde begun to rake up the old data in your field, defenses rise, judgement rises, and people speak their program words that have been spoon fed through over lifetimes, the hot knife through butter is simply to ask, is that your discovery or that of another..

Chiron shall be taking us over old wounds, for some this may present as areas you thought you had healed but the truth is you are just unlocking a new section of your cosmic keyhole, the process that we experience that takes us through what’s required to understand, innerstand and finally overstand, the process that happens before the heart begins to open.

The heart cannot open whilst we hold fear programs, the gates of any frequency will never open until the energy is of a match, and any fear frequencies held cannot get close to the magical opening of the heart, which happens as you become a clear conduit for light.

So you could be getting some past knocking on the door for clearing/renewal Parental wounding comes up Relationships now out of frequency cut and clear along with the rising of the reason as to why this has been your experience.

Much of what the collective thought was solid is soon to be shown it was built on wonky ego stilts and you now have the space to go in, remove what is required before the whole thing comes tumbling down…

So what are you going to do? Be proactive on the details and triggers you have now? Or learn deeper lessons in how to take the commanders seat of your life journey.

The choice is yours and 6 planets in retrograde might just provide the space to learn.

The Sun and moon are now in a square off with the nodes in conjunct and opposition adding to the tension pot and not just this a surprise blast of solar wind from a CME that wasn’t expected to make contact, but it did, and it cracked our field.

This brings the temperature up and moves us all into action, for some it will feel tight like a painful squeeze.

Heads in vices Nervous system in full alert Anxiety Irritation

Is how the collective field is warbling

This requires us to clear our field, to pay attention and hold the Alignment, dissolving what refuses to return to light and expanding into the space that can hold light.

Choose wisely where you place your energy and remember your little neuron antennas are rapidly drawing in experiences based upon how you feel and what you are thinking. And whilst the mind is in fear programming…you guessed it….you get more to See!

What makes this very interesting is that by the time Chiron stations direct he will be on the 1st degree of Aries and conjunct the fixed star Kerb….the cut, the new beginning and we finish up here on the 12.12. 2019 or perhaps 12.12.12 or perhaps you would like 3.3.3

You can pull this bandaid slowly and feel the pull of the hairs go one by one or a quick flick and it’s off.

You choose….but it’s heading in regardless

*****

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