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#this was supposed to be a simple headcanon post
monkeyparasite · 2 years
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i think i think the dear boy willys willam has a bad case of the 'tism's expect he isn't diagnosed and if he was it would absolutely ruin his stupid lil heart because he has forever built up hatred of what he is, like a homosexual, so he will just pretend he is oh-so straight and allistic even though his "homie nights" with his blonde boy consist of him not shutting the fuck up about the confederacy and civil war, all while he shares a milkshake with two straws in them for him and his blonde human clumpy cottage cheese of a boyfriend's green dotted eyes literally fuck-about going in two different directions, but not to worry, because ol' willy silly is too into telling him about whatever his stupid wet brain is hyperfixated on and that Dick also has his own straw in his (or their?) milkshake
its only when the food finally get delivered that he notices that there are TWO STRAWS instead of JUST ONE!! in the milkshake, and both are pointing at the other person, which he then offendedly asked his stupid eyed boyfriend why he put one in there for himself huffing that he wasn't gay and didn't want it anymore, only for the blondie to correct him by saying he was the one that put the straw in that was facing towards him while he was caught up infodumping or should i say.. explaining where the confederate flag was first made and who made it before then putting his own pointing towards himself
but he just gets more upset and tells dick to fuck off and shut the fuck up. anyways after a long awkward silence he goes back to rambling about whatever the fuck <33
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fuckdamn · 2 years
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after they rekindle their relationship in season 4 andrea asks jesse to tell her as much as he can. not about the business, not about where he got that money he left in their mailbox (there are things she doesn’t want to know, things she’s heard enough about for a lifetime, things she doesn’t want uttered anywhere near her son). but she likes jesse, and she believes that he’s sensitive and well-intentioned, and she wants to understand why he withdraws for weeks or months on end, why he’s harboring so much grief and fear and uncertainty. she appreciates the distance he keeps between her and his work. she doesn’t appreciate being kept in the dark.
so they lie in bed and talk things through, navigating gently around anything the other doesn’t want to hear or share (that give and take becomes natural as they find they’re both better at minding the fractures in the other’s wounded psyche than their own. it’s a language of love for them: saying enough, but never saying too much. being careful, but being candid). jesse details the downward spiral that brought him to rehab, tells her about jane. “should i keep going?” he doesn’t want to wax poetic about his dead girlfriend to his new girlfriend…
andrea urges him on. she wants to hear about jane, wants to bear witness to her life. as she listens, she thinks that if she herself died young (and she’d come close on a few occasions), she would want to be spoken about with this much reverence. she thinks about tomás (though honestly, she rarely stops thinking about tomás), how she stopped talking about him when he was still here, and now that he’s gone, she feels like there’s nobody she can really share him with (not as she knew him), and like her brother’s spirit has buried itself deep in her chest, and the pain is both a bottomless ache and a swelling pressure (and like the child her brother was, it begs her to carry it).
jesse is visibly struggling to maintain composure as he talks. this isn’t the first time andrea’s seen him get emotional, or even the second or third (this well of feeling is always ready to overflow just beneath the surface. it’s part of why she trusts him). and he mentions that jane was a tattoo artist with no tattoos, and something clicks for andrea. “jane. abq ink,” she provides. he nods. andrea feels a fresh pang of grief. “i liked jane.”
“you knew jane?” he asks, his lower lip trembling. andrea shifts to show him the tattoo on her hipbone, a butterfly surrounded by an intricate and beautiful botanical design, and jesse’s seen the tattoo before, but he’s never really looked at it. that’s jane’s style, her lines, her disarmingly soft blending.
“i got this after i left rehab for the first time. she was really nice. gave me a discount because she was in recovery too.” andrea swallows hard. she didn’t know jane for long, but she remembers her pitch black hair, her dry sense of humor, the easy way they talked throughout the process. and jesse looks at the tattoo again, so overwhelmed by seeing jane’s art alive on the body of another woman he loves, so unable to even process this happenstance, that he just breaks down crying in her arms.
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malusrecord · 1 month
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The fact that you can tell which Howard is which by body language alone is really something. Take sitting for example:
Alpha!Howard? Very demure, very space/bubble conscious---he generally keeps his hands tucked near or physically on his person, pats his knees/legs, etc---because he's a worrier, doesn't want to intrude or take up too much space, etc, which clearly showcases how self conscious he is as a person. He's not going to move away if someone sits close to him; if anything he'd lean in if it's someone that he trusts, but he's so in his own head about everything he'd clearly be thinking about if he should or not, to the point of almost asking for permission if he's rattled or distracted by something.
Prime!Howard? Very very very aggressive in how he sits---we're talking spread legged, arms and hands perched on whatever he's sitting on rather than being kept to himself, etc---he practically dominates the space that he's sitting at and it's a subtle nod to how on guard he is. He's going to take up all the room so others can't approach easily. He lets you know he's there and while he shares Alpha's restless quirks---he does the leg pat for example---but it comes off as him being impatient more than anything else and it's clear he's coming from a place of wanting to be ready at a moments notice. This man is ready to move in order to do something, regardless of what that something is, and god help you if you're in his way. Prime would get up instantly in order to fight someone, defend his territory, and so on, which also shows he's uncomfortable he is because he's lost the ability to truly relax around others.
It's important to note that both men are capable of sharing space but they both have their own walls put up that you'll have to work around beforehand.
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theragethatisdesire · 11 months
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aot men as dads - headcanon!! some 18+!!
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includes: eren, jean, reiner, & levi
i'm still working on some full-fledged one-shots and parts of my series', but i'm nannying for the summer and have BABY FEVER. please enjoy my little headcanons of my fav aot men as dads <3
DISCLAIMER: some of this post contains MATURE CONTENT that is intended only for those over 18. if you are a minor, please do not read below the cut.
Eren
ok but eren is such a cringe dad lol
buys himself all of the #1 Dad! merch. he’s got mugs, tshirts, hats, all of it, and all of it went on his credit card.
10000% a girl dad. loves all the little dresses and bows; he puts your daughter’s hair in its first bun, nearly tears up when she points at his matching hairstyle and babbles “like da-da!”
you have to parent eren as much as the children. when you turn the corner into the living room where he’s supposed to be having “quiet time” with your toddler only to find that they’re buried in a pillow fort and eren’s signed his own name in crayon on the wall next to your daughter’s scribblings. “babe, we can just repaint it! she’s being creative.”
loves when you’re pregnant. after your first, eren keeps a calendar on the wall marking off the days until it’s safe for him to fuck you again, fuck a baby right back into you. already has a breeding kink before your first. develops a lactation kink after.
TERRIFIED (and i mean terrified) of hurting your little angel. has absolutely zero concept of “cry it out”; if he hears his baby crying, he’s sprinting into the next room, kissing a nonexistent boo-boo.
refuses to admit it but he has no backbone when it comes to your daughter wanting literally anything. she wants it, she gets it.
favorite thing in the world is matching outfits. favorite. “babe, where’s her green hoodie? i’m wearing mine today for the park!” “of course it matters, we have to match! on that note, where’s yours?”
lets your daughter use his hair to learn how to braid. usually has a few pink hair ties or glittery clips sticking out of it when you come home from a mom’s night out.
really big on your baby getting to see the world. drags you on vacation to any place he can think of, even as you try to explain to him that she can’t form any long term memories yet. “but baby, she’ll have pictures. how many kids in her class can bring a picture of them at the eiffel tower to their first show-and-tell?”
accidentally ruins santa and the tooth fairy for your daughter. cries harder than she does over it.
aggressively vets babysitters. ends up settling for a nursing student in the labor & delivery school who’s the oldest of seven children and probably more knowledgeable about child development than both of you combined, but he’s still suspicious.
wants to watch while you push, watch his baby come into the world. you’ve never seen a sweeter sight than eren in his scrubs, crying while holding your baby girl.
Jean
most people picture eren as being the roughhousing dad, but it’s jean, and i will die on this hill.
freaks out every time he drops your first boy while throwing him around like a ragdoll, but he’ll never stop because “listen!! he’s laughing!”. when it comes to the rest of them, he’s experienced enough now to tell the difference between a real booboo and an imagined one, and he simply brushes their little pants off caringly before shouting “now you tackle me!”
jean’s got no gender preference for your first, or the rest of your little brood for that matter. he raises them exactly the same, regardless: tough.
it takes him awhile to get used to the concept of babies’ minds. you’ve walked in on him having full-blown arguments with your shrieking toddlers several times. “what’s not making sense? if you let your goldfish ‘swim’ in the toilet, it dies, simple as that.”
plays “bad cop” for you because you’re terrible at it, but he’s always having to turn around and snicker into his elbow in the middle of scolding because your babies get the same little throbbing forehead vein as you when they’re mad
wants a big family, and gets it. you practically have to drag him to get his balls snipped after your fourth, him reminding you that “it’s reversible!” the entire way there.
the newborn phase is his favorite. he’s rarely home for any longer than ten minutes without scooping your most recent addition into his arms, squishing their little cheeks and marveling at their gurgling noises.
the kids never give him anxiety, but when you’re pregnant??? jean’s a wreck.
“do your feet still hurt, love?” “what do you mean you have indigestion? that could be the baby coming!” “of course we can’t have sex, what if we poke its little head?”
definitely the dad that’s got a delivery bag and a backup bag and an emergency third backup of the backup bag in his car at all times. the first week of your third trimester, he starts watching you suspiciously for any signs of labor, even though this is your fourth together. you think you’ve got it down by now, you tell him, but he won’t listen.
always gets the kids to work together on little surprises for you. every mother’s day they wake you up with breakfast, every valentines day your dining room table is covered in handmade cards, every birthday your kitchen is coated in flour from jean and four little ones attempting to bake
SO HARD to drag him out for a date night. he wants to bring them everywhere: the fancy restaurant, the couples' get away trip
jean's that dad standing in the bar, watching the game, beer in hand, with an occupied baby carrier strapped to his chest
wants to watch during delivery, but he passed out the first go-round, so now he’s content standing up by your head, trying not to turn white as you squeeze his hand hard enough to break.
talks you into just one more on your fourth’s second birthday. “they’re all so big now. don’t you miss it, babe? my baby in your belly? c’mon…” turns out he reversed that vasectomy without telling you
Reiner
another girl dad. hardcore girl dad.
buys his little princess all number of dresses and barbies, is confused when she’s more interested in the baseballs her classmates have.
accidentally raises the most tomboyish, toughest little girl. still babies her, and she hates it.
cries more than you do on your first date night out when you leave her with your mom. forgets to order his entree at the restaurant because he’s watching the baby monitor app on his phone.
definitely the best at splitting baby duties with you. reiner’s up before you most nights when she wakes, grabbing a bottle and cooing at her lovingly even as she screams. you always try to stay awake to watch him on the baby monitor, though, heart melting as his massive arms rock the tiny bundle back to sleep.
all the neighborhood kids love him because of his size. at every cookout, reiner can’t help on the grill because he’s buried in the grass in a little army of toddlers, led by your daughter, shrieking with joy.
always taking pictures. literally always. unflattering ones when you fall asleep breastfeeding, candids at the zoo, eighteen identical pictures of the lock of hair from her first haircut clogging up his camera roll.
can’t be the bad cop. literally ever. he just can’t say no to his little princess, can’t break her precious little heart by telling her that throwing her food onto the floor is bad.
takes your daughter to mommy & me classes with him
DILF DILF DILF. all the moms in the classes swoon over him and gossip about him when he’s not there; much to your annoyance, reiner never notices, insisting that they’re his “mommy friends”.
always sporting a little bit of glitter on his face or a sticker on his back from your daughter
coming from a fatherless background, reiner nearly kills himself trying to be a constant presence in your daughter’s life (you have to remind him that he has to rest too)
never misses an open house night at school, even if it nearly gets him fired. coaches all of her sports teams. literally almost cries when she makes her first soccer goal. actually does cry when she tells you the boy sitting beside her in class called her his girlfriend. full-blown breakdown on her first day of school, so bad he has to stay home from work.
the absolute BEST through your pregnancy and delivery. always cooking your craving of the week, constant foot and back rubs, stays up all night with you for the three days before the birth when you’re just too swollen and miserable to sleep.
holds your hand through the entire delivery, gets in the doctors’ way when they’re performing checkups because “i’m her father, i need to know what’s going on”
Levi
levi never pictured himself as having children, but when your little surprise arrives, blinking up at levi with his own grey, owlish eyes, levi can’t believe he hadn’t thought of it sooner.
very easily irritated with anyone asking questions about your home life.
when his coworkers ask for your newborn’s name, levi simply says “child.” are you two trying again? “why the fuck do you need to know?”
super overprotective. your baby waves at someone in the supermarket, and levi’s leaning down to explain (in words your eight-month-old can’t yet understand) stranger danger.
totally one of those parents that goes half-crazy trying to get their child into the top-notch, snobby preschool in town.
“we’re not wasting his intelligence on the public school”
levi grew up with basically nothing, so he goes all out buying the best baby products on the market. $2,500 strollers, researching “best baby toys for development”, the whole nine yards.
100% spends months trying to get your child to make a game out of picking up his own toys after playtime, but it never works.
has a meal plan for your child to “optimize nutrition” that you have to sneak around to give your baby little chocolates and junk snacks.
“why are there pringles in his playtime bag? they have no nutritional value.”
vets anyone that comes around your child, even other children. “no more playtime with that evan kid. he’s always got a cold or something.”
he’s always been a light sleeper, but once you have your child, levi snores beside them watching kids’ cartoons on the tv like you’ve never seen him, even drooling as his head lolls, arm tucked tight around your little one.
learned everything he could about labor and delivery beforehand
you almost killed him in the delivery room as he explained each medical detail of your labor symptoms to “reassure” you. he finally got the hint when you threatened to decapitate him.
he thinks it’s shameful, but watching you be a mother turns. him. on. 
wants to take you right there when he catches you breastfeeding, watches you read a bedtime story, spin your child around laughing. you’re just so naturally good at it and it makes him love you all the more, all that love going straight between his legs.
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nxuvillette · 5 months
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"I THINK YOU DESERVE A PROMOTION"
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ASSISTANT HEADCANONS W/ GENSHIN MEN
synopsis: becoming an assistant for your hot boss is a dream come true, no? it sounds even better when you both are up to things that might land you a promotion.
❥- including : cyno, neuvillette, baizhu, wriothesley
❥- note : aaaa! my first post! i’m super nervous but i hope you all enjoy <3 reblogs are appreciated!!
content warnings : nsfw [17+], fem!assistant!reader, ageless + blank blogs dni, office sex (cyno , wriothesley), creampie (all), car sex (neuvillette), mentions of food (neuvillette), mentions of medications (baizhu), brief spanking (baizhu), use of pet names (good girl , baby , darling, pretty girl), brief dacryphillia (wriothesley), belly bulge (wriothesley), public sex (baizhu).
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♡ CYNO
you were just supposed to be revising some documents for your boss, cyno. after all, he had a meeting had to attend not even thirty minutes from the current time. you thought it would be simple enough, right? this wasn’t the first time he had asked you to do such a thing for him, but what was going on was something that wasn’t exactly professional.
cyno had you bent over his creaking desk. his hand was lying against your hip while he rutted himself into your squelching cunt that was squeezing him so perfectly he thought he would cum the moment he pushed into you. you were just too hard to resist with your cute black mini skirt that showed a little too much of your thighs. you were just too pretty. how could he possibly stop himself from completely ravaging your cunt?
“ah..! cyno, please..!” your cries echoed across the room, making him shove his fingers into your mouth to make you quiet down. the last thing he wanted was for someone to hear him fucking the absolute shit out of his assistant. 
he leaned towards your ear, his breath fanning against the shell. “better keep quiet.. or else i’ll stop right now and leave you wondering what might have happened..” he whispered, which earned goosebumps to litter your delicate skin.
cyno’s pace began to suddenly quicken. he could feel himself growing closer to his orgasm. his cock twitched inside of you and that delicious high he had been chasing finally came over him. his cum seeped into your womb, filling you completely. you took it so nicely. it took everything in him to not want to go for round two. 
he pulled out, adjusting his pants and leaving a small kiss on your cheek. “get dressed.. we still have a meeting.” he said, heading towards the door.
♡ NEUVILLETTE
being tasked with picking up lunch for the office sounded like a simple enough task. neuvillette had even offered to go with you so you didn’t have to carry all of the food items by yourself, so you happily agreed since he was your boss. he also drove so you didn’t have to use your own vehicle to transfer everything over.
it was fine, up until you both arrived into the parking lot of your office building.
your thighs were on either side of neuvillette’s lap. his thick cock was bullying your walls, reaching the most sensitive spots inside of your pussy. you hadn’t expected such a scene to unfold, but there was just way too much tension circling between you both to just leave the car without anything happening. 
“n-neuvillette! ‘so good.. fuck!” you sobbed into his shoulder when you felt his thumb toying with your puffy clit. 
neuvillette’s thrusts were erratic. he craved you for so fucking long that he wasn’t about to let the opportunity to fuck your brains out slip through his grasp. after all, you were his gorgeous assistant that he just couldn’t help but sneak glances at. “keep going, just like that, darling. fuck.. you take me so well..” he cooed, grunting a bit as your cunt squeezed his cock with such delight.
his arms went to snake around your waist. his pace became brutally quick as his high slowly crept upon him. all he wanted was you in that very moment. 
he practically growled when his orgasm washed over him. his body trembled and he squeezed your ass hard enough to possibly leave a mark on your pretty skin. you were a complete mess and you weren’t sure how you were supposed to walk into the office afterwards.
♡ BAIZHU
becoming an assistant for a well known pharmacist was like a dream come true. he was a great boss, and you honestly hoped to become like him someday when you finally became a pharmacist for your own company. baizhu was truly great at his work.
he sent you on the way to fetch a prescription that was specifically just for him. this wasn’t an unusual occurrence since baizhu had some underlying illnesses that needed certain medications to treat, but you weren’t anticipating that something like this would be occurring instead of him taking his meds.
baizhu had you pressed against the wall. his cock was buried inside of your dripping pussy. you were both trying your best to remain quiet as your other coworkers were around making prescriptions for the other customers. you couldn’t deny that you and baizhu had thrown a few flirty comments towards one another. you just remained professionally due to the fact that he was in fact your higher up.
the tension eventually snapped, and you two pounced on one another. he pushed you into the closet and made your body burn with passion. “baizhu..! o-oh, god..” you whined, arching your back against his body. he was just too damn good.
he chuckled, dragging his fingertips along your flesh. he was honestly playing such a dangerous game right now. it was almost as if he was itching to make you cry out his name. “heh.. you’re such a pretty girl.. i never thought you would feel this great..” he smacked your ass harshly, making you wince from the contact of his palm.
his grunts began to increase in volume and his grip on your body had become much tighter. the way his balls slapped against your clit sent waves of pleasure over your body. you gasped as that white hot knot inside of you finally snapped, allowing your orgasm to fully pass over you. it was also at that moment baizhu finally came, letting his cum fill your walls. 
the two of you both were completely messy and there was this lingering odor of sex that was wafting around the room. baizhu only laughed at your fucked out state. “you did great.. maybe i’ll promote you full time, hm?” 
♡ WRIOTHESLEY
you were asked by your boss wriothesley to stay after hours to work on some other paperwork that needed to be done before the next week. it wasn’t out of the ordinary for him to ask you for such a request. plus, you were being paid overtime for doing it, so why the hell not? 
however, your extra work wasn’t exactly what you thought it was going to be.
you were lying flat on your back with wriothesley thrusting himself into you. all of the papers that were on his desk were now scattered around and pushed over so you wouldn’t possibly ruin them. he was so big. wriothesley could see a little bulge every time he pushed himself into you. he thought it was so cute. you sprawled out on his desk with your pussy clamped around his big dick. your moans were the best part. there was no one around, so you could be as loud as you wanted without a single interruption.
“w-wriothesley! f-fuck.. you’re so big!” tears formed at your lash line from how intense the pleasure was. you hadn’t felt something like this in such a long time. it was unbearable.
he couldn’t hide the smirk that appeared on his scarred features. he couldn’t get enough of your sweet voice screaming in pleasure for just him. “you like this, baby? you’re so fuckin’ cute when you say my name like that..” he pressed his palm against your navel, feeling his cock stuffing you full. “so deep.. no wonder you’re a mess.”
his balls twitched, signaling that his orgasm was just around the corner. his pace then picked up, sending you over the edge. he was probably the best you had ever taken. there was no way you could ever sleep with someone else better than him. a groan rumbled in his throat as he reached his peak, squeezing your hips as his cum flooded your walls. he left so much, it made you shiver from the warmth.
he panted, chuckling as he came down from his orgasm. “heh.. we’re still alone, wanna go for round two?” 
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© NXUVILLETTE ┆ all rights reserved, do not repost, translate, or claim as your own.
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fqiryspit · 1 year
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FOOTBALL PLAYER EREN HEADCANONS
eren x fem!reader
cw: eren is head over heels for you, crazy fangirls, death threats, eren fucking you, you sucking him, etc etc
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you've been in a relationship with eren before his hair was that long and when he stumbled nervously over everything.
he still looks back and cringes, wondering why you wanted to date him
you two have been lifelong friends and once you started your relationship things really were perfect.
eren's football career really took off in college, and he got a lot more attention from the girls on campus rather than old men.
soon he and his team were absolutely famous and you were so excited for him -and incredibly grateful your relationship was swiped under the rug during that time. he had millions of fan girls posting fics and edits of him daily, it was insane.
you asked him to not speak on your relationship -because he got those questions a lot so he just responds with a simple "I'm happy" when they get asked
he wants to -so badly- show you off. to laugh at all his annoying fan girls and bring you out, but, he respects your decision.
after his games, he is absolutely wrecked. he flops down onto the bed and you climb on top of him and start massaging his scalp and he just moans into the sheets
"did you have fun?"
"how was I supposed to have fun when you weren't there?" he says, needy as ever
"errreeen I'm not gonna be able to go that far for every game" you huff
.
and this man loves to spoil you. designer bags out of the blue, wait, did you just eye that coat? no worries, he's just gonna purchase that really quickly.
eren truly truly loves you, he knows he is gonna marry you, it's just a fact.
he melts when he is with you, always needing to hold you in some way and just have you near.
he fanaticizes about your wedding and babies with you late at night or when he's balls deep in you
"fuck, can't wait to fill you up with my babies, gonna make you a mommy"
and by the way, after a game. a win or a loss, he's fucking you.
if he won, he's letting his victory in your pussy, ramming into you over and over while your legs bend in abnormal positions every two seconds while he babbles about how he couldn't get his mind off you the whole time
if he lost...oh man. he's taking all that anger out on you. it goes on for hours until he is finally drained and calm while you lay there full of his cum.
before a conference, you give him a "good luck suck" because he hates going to them, and this makes him feel a lot better <3
.
his fans are crazy, and once they caught wind of your relationship, all hell broke loose.
a photo came to light of eren simply hugging you. you know how careful he is with that stuff so you hid it from him, knowing he rarely goes on social media it should be a breeze, right?
you had your knees up to your chest and a twisted brow on, reading through the death threats and horrible comments made about your appearance.
you're an idiot for not privating your account in time, they found you and are coming in full swing.
you felt your stomach sink, you shouldn't let them get to you, but they're pointing out insecurities you've been trying to bury
"you okay?"
you look up to see eren, in the doorway with a concerned look all over his face. you turn off your phone and put a smile on
"yeah, just stupid stuff" you chuckle uncomfortably. he walks over and climbs onto the bed
"what happened?" "nothing, eren"
he looked at you for a couple more seconds, giving you the option to tell him what was going on. then his eyes slowly traveled to your phone you tossed across the bed. you reached for it franticly but he got it in time and as you yelled out his name he unlocked it with his face
everything on his face just dropped in an instant, he read through message after message about people wishing you dead, saying not-so-nice things about your looks, and more.
he asked when this started while he kept staring into the phone, then asked why you didn't tell him.
"I knew it would worry you, so I just-" "you need to tell me these things" he reached over to grab his phone as he started typing, you looked over to see him making a twitter post and you freaked
"don't say anything about it!" you plead, but it was too late, he made a simple post yelling at his 'fans' and then turned his phone off and held you
"please don't worry about those stupid messages"
.
in all, footballplayer!eren is the man of your dreams, and he hopes you haven't found the ring box in his sock drawer yet. <3
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an: love him sm <3
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mizusnose · 3 months
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ahem so I just read your college fuckboy mizu headcanons (which I loved) and was wondering if I could request a lil something about fuckboy mizu genuinely liking the reader so she makes changes to convince the reader she's serious. Reader would probs be SUPER skeptical bc casual relationships isn't their thing but it'd be so cute. Obvs you can just ignore this if you don't want to do it my mind has just been mizu brainrot lately
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so i’ve been letting this one marinate for a bit BUT: reader who gets together with Taigen to spite Mizu who won’t get serious for reader. Cue the jealousy, club shenanigans, and poet mizu (!!)
boyfriend by dove cameron for max brainrot
———
Taigen was a fine boyfriend. All things considered. He was better than most of the guys you’d been with before, and he had a motorcycle that he’d let you take pics with and post them on your feed.
But, he wasn’t Mizu.
This point had been made several times. Mostly on Taigen’s end. His constant whining of I see the way you look at her, god I bet you thought I was a woman huh, better yet—you wished I was her huh!
He wasn’t wrong, necessarily. It wasn’t your fault you’d gotten bored and decided to go to Taigen’s fencing practice. It wasn’t like you’d intended on falling head over heels for the hot butch lesbian who had a mean smirk and a sweaty jaw when she whooped Taigen’s ass.
You still remembered the way she had her neck bared, her hair falling over her shoulders, the beat of her heart nestled in between her collarbones, the dark green of her veins under her skin.
So, yeah, maybe you did have a thing for Mizu, who may or may not be your boyfriend’s biggest rival.
Heavy quotations on the rival part since Mizu didn’t give a shit that Taigen hated her—in fact, she didn’t care that the majority of the lesbians, bisexual, and bi-curious girls on campus hated her guts.
But that was what made her interesting.
You’d thought about it often: her, telling you to leave as soon as you’d come on her tongue or strap or fingers, (whatever was fine, you weren’t picky.) and you’d feel that tug in your tummy and your jaw would relax and fall open and—
“hah, did you come?”
And then you’d be back where you started: dating Taigen and fucking him and not being able to enjoy it or come or anything.
The thing was this: You’d only ever been in long-term relationships. Never dabbled in casual one night stands that Mizu was rumored to stick by. Even if you did want her, her time was limited. And you didn’t exactly love sharing.
So, when Taigen complained about having to go out this weekend to “bond or some teammate trust building shit, pfft, as if we aren’t trying to kill each other every practice. Not to mention Mizu will be there,” You convinced him to go, and for you to tag along. As moral support of course.
Now as much as Taigen loved telling you how much he hated Mizu, he liked coming to the thought of her much more. You’d done it quite often, bring Mizu up in sex, the way she’d fence and made him look like a fucking loser. How good she’d look kissing you, having you, taking you away from him. You’d both come then, not just him.
So you supposed it wasn’t that weird to be crushing over Mizu. Especially when the weekend came and the alcohol was sweet and fizzy and the wine dark and bitter, and the club lights shimmering on Mizu’s skin, her hair, her hands as she came up behind you.
“Hey.” She said. Simple, easy, confident. Her hands brushed your exposed back, the bend of your hip, the jut of your ribs.
“Hi.” You said. Sultry, warm, quiet so she’d have to twist closer to hear you when you gasped as she held your waist, tighter this time. A little mean, “I have a boyfriend.”
And she’d chuckle, and pull away and quirk her dark eyebrow up, “Really? Him?” A barely there glance at Taigen who was with the other fencing team members taking body shots off one another, “I could be a better boyfriend than him, you know.”
She spun you around, the steady heat of her palm always on you, “You know me.” It wasn’t a question. You saw the way Mizu’s eyes dragged across your body on her way over, her tongue on her lips as she stared. She knew you were Taigen’s girlfriend.
“Been watching.” She brought you closer, shifted her hands and then you were close. Closer than you’d ever been to her before.
She smelled heady and like pinewood. The plane of her chest was defined, sturdy, and you wondered if she had small breasts, if they were sensitive.
“Can’t believe I almost went home when you’re here—all alone.” She smirked, the same damned smirk you’d replay in your mind as you masturbated and thought of her, “Think I might just steal you from him, hm?”
Her hands slipped up your back, to the bottom of your nape, a demanding grip: there one second, gone the next. She watched your face, your lips, your neck.
“Does this usually work on other girls?”
You pushed away then, your legs wobbly and your underwear damp. You wanted, but you knew exactly what Mizu thought of you: an easy thing, something of Taigen’s. Good for a night, forgotten the next.
So you straightened your clothes, and met Mizu’s confused gaze, “I have a boyfriend.”
Mizu’s mouth twitched. Barely. But you’d caught it as you turned, and headed to the bartop. Even if Mizu was who you’d wanted, being a one-night stand wasn’t what you wanted.
So, you walked back over to Taigen, beers in hand, and watched Mizu as you kissed him wide and dirty. Her glare a steely weight in your belly, and on your beating cunt.
You’d make Mizu yours, one way or another.
——-
Let’s make this a 2 parter. Poet mizu will have to wait. Thanks for the ask :)
347 notes · View notes
bonbonshideout · 1 month
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Ticci Toby headcanons
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Pre-Slender
♤ He's clingy. If he likes someone or is even remotely comfortable, he would follow them around just to feel comfortable.
♡ He's... playful, he isn't the brightest, but he would try and play some pranks if he can, usually learn about you and see what can get you upset & use that on you.
◇ Mf got that crow brain. He would see anything shiny and take it. He's got a growing collection and even looks for things to give to his favorite people. Lyra originally gave him a box to store the items in, but it started growing a bit 'out of control', and so he has shelves and other boxes with random nick-nacks.
♧ His little cow? Lyra, 100%. When he was younger he had a lot to deal with and Lyra wasn't always able to be with him so she saved up some birthday money and bought him a cow plush, due to it being from his sister, he's kept it and carried it literally everywhere with him. Multiple rips and tears, but his mom always fixed it up for him. He loved it and would take to around as he grew older, though he didn't have it out in public like he did when he was younger.
♤ His hoodie is one of a kind and handmade. His mom was the one to have made it. Originally, he wanted a hoodie that was like any other, but he couldn't puck between a couple of them; his mom, in the end, decided to create a simple looking hoodie for him.
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Post-Slender
♤ He doesn't remember much. Yeah, he might get occasional flashbacks, but they leave him confused. He wants to figure out what they mean but at the same time he's a bit scared of doing so.
♡ His hoodie? he loves it, covered in patches of different colors, or at least he tries to color match.
◇ He still has his cow, but he doesn't carry it around as much. He keeps it in a safe place; having a connection to it but not knowing its origins anymore. He baby's it occasionally when he does take it out of his little storage area. That thing has gone through way too much, put it out of its misery already.
♧ Lyra's spirit haunts him, but it's not supposed to be much of a tormentor; though he sees it that way, Lyra is trying to guide him in life. I believe the operator's doing some shit to his mind that's causing him to see Lyra's spirit as vengeful, or it's simply creating an image of Lyra and whispering into Toby's mind about he's at fault for everything.
♤ He's still got that crow brain, still finding things to give to people (Natalie) , a pretty rock, maybe a button, anything he finds, he takes it and saves them.
♡ He's strangely affectionate, he isn't the type to be overbearing, but he likes to hug Natalie whenever he can, usually she accepts them, but there are times where she isn't in a good mood and it upsets him a little— he gets over it quickly though.
◇ He's terrified of cars and probably motorcycles, too (blame Nat for that one). Occasionally, though, he is forced into either one due to Natalie for faster transportation. He hates it and curses her out through the whole ride, but he does see how convenient it is.
♧ In Spanish, there's a term for kids who don't know anything, the "no sabo" kid. He is that type of kid, but with German. He knows very little, and even then, he can't form proper sentences. He's trying to learn when he isn't busy murdering people or starting fires. Usually asking Natalie to help him out— even though she doesn't speak German— he just wants someone to practice it with.
♤ He HATES being seen as vulnerable or lesser than. He doesn't really know why to the full extent, but he does know that it just sucks. He wants people to know that he can do as much as anyone else can, heck, maybe more and better.
♡ I wanna say he had an ego, but it's more playful. He jokes about having a huge ego, but he could care less if 'someone offends him' (aside from the previous hc).
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I feel like some of these collide with some headcanons a friend might have? idk, I honestly forgot his entire essay 💀
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noiryinn · 1 month
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study sessions
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pairing(s): oblivious!itoshi sae x flirty!male reader
summary: you are giving one too many hints that you like sae, but he gets none of them and assumes you two are a bit too close for friends. you decide to take matters into your own hands and be his secret admirer
warnings: none!
word count: 4.5k
a/n: thanks for the support on my last post i love you guys!! it’s like one of my biggest headcanons that sae is oblivious to things such as romance cuz the only thing he canonically knows abt is football 😭. i had no idea what to write for the notes so...yeah. also, i didn't intend for it to be so long, i just kept writing. anyways enjoy this mess of a fic! <3 (not proof read)
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you sat in class, leaning on your right hand, thinking and a bit annoyed. how hasn’t sae taken the hint? you don’t just flirt with your friends, dammit! you probably couldn’t even ask him out cause he’d just assume you were joking. you don’t ask friends out as a joke either do you? friends…that word left a bad taste in your mouth. you were so blatantly obvious, but he couldn’t take the hint? you started thinking of plans that might work. then you settled on one. be sae's secret admirer, then reveal who you are! the more you thought about it, the more the plan seemed like a good idea. it was around a week from his birthday too, maybe that'd be your gift to him, a new boyfriend. you grinned in excitement, this was gonna be fun!
after you got home, you decided to write him a note and put it in his locker. you changed your handwriting while you were writing the note, not wanting him to discover who it was immediately. it was pretty simple, but kinda (very) directed at his obliviousness, but it was nothing out of his comfort zone. the note read "i think you're pretty cute, but you can't take a hint. maybe start paying attention to how others act around you!". you wondered if your plan would work, but only time will tell.
the next day you arrived early and put the note in his locker. you hoped that he wouldn’t throw it out like the other love letters and confessions he got. your prayers were answered though, as during lunch, when you were sitting at your guys’ desks, he said something. “i got a note in my locker today,” he said bluntly. “yeah?” you grinned, “and you didn’t throw it out?” you silently celebrated. “no, something about it was different.” he gave you the note and crossed his arms before leaning them on the table. “what did she mean by ‘start paying attention to how others act around you’?” his eyebrows furrowed in curiousity. “she, huh? you think it’s a girl?” you looked in his eyes. “are you implying it’s not?” sae raised an eyebrow. “just saying, ya never know” you smiled.
you stared at the note a bit longer. “kinda funny how they say you’re cute but then say you’re oblivious,” you chuckled, “can’t blame ‘em” you flirted, but the tone was quite subtle. “what’s that supposed to mean?” sae looked at you curiously, “don’t worry ‘bout it” you waved off. “seriously—nevermind. you’re impossible anyway” he sighed in defeat. you grinned at him, “yeah, i know.”
you looked over at the note again, “honestly, i think it’s a sign to think about anything other than football.” you remarked as you toyed with the edge of the note, your fingers tracing the words as you tried to gauge sae's reaction. “football is not the only thing i think about. it's important to me, though.” sae said, his tone a bit offended. “you literally don’t pay attention in class because you’re thinking about it.” you stared at him with an eyebrow raised, “that’s why we go on like study dates all the time.” you put the word ‘date’ on purpose, wondering how he’d react. “i guess you’re right.” he said indifferently. no reaction... “hey, we gotta test tomorrow, right? let’s go to my place and study for it!” you suggested, “but we have to practice for our upcoming practice match after midterms…” he protested, both of you were on the school’s team and often practiced together. “well you won’t play if you don’t keep up your grades!” you protested right back. “…fine. i’ll go over to your house.”
after the school day was over, you waited at the gates for sae so you two could walk home. he was late, which made you annoyed. so you decided to text him. his contact name read ‘sae ❤️’ which he never commented on, for some odd reason. you texted him “where r u?? i’ve been waiting for like 10 minutes”. after 1 or 2 minutes he responded with “sorry, some girl confessed to me. i think she was the one who left me the note.” oh how wrong he was…
sae finally met up with you and he was as stoic as ever. “well well well, look who showed up,” you got up from the wall you leaned on, “betcha you rejected that girl without hesitation as usual, didn’t you?” you smirked, seeing how she was clearly upset and tearing up. you hoped that wouldn’t be you… “i wouldn’t say without hesitation…” sae shoved his hands in his pockets. “yeah right! you totally did, she’s crying cuz of ya, playboy!” you snickered a bit, “it’s not funny, l/n. and don’t call me ‘playboy’” he looked at you coldly. “you’re such a buzzkill, it was a joke anyways, handsome.” you teased with a coy smirk before putting an arm around his shoulder. “ugh, don’t call me that either, what’s even the point of calling me that?” he replied with a grimace. “ah, just saying cause you are, and all the girls seem to think so too.” you smirked. “don’t joke around like that.” he said, a face of disdain became more evident. “see? a total buzzkill…”
you opened the door to your house before turning and speaking to him, “so, you wanna tell me what happened with that girl?” your curiosity was out of this roof. “she confessed to me like any other girl. but i think she was the one, cause she handed me a letter and the handwriting was pretty similar.” sae mentioned. “that so? and what if it doesn’t stop?” you asked, already knowing the answer. “try to find out who it is, i guess”
the two of you went up to your room. it wasn’t messy but it wasn’t clean either. you grabbed an extra chair, put it at your desk and you two started studying together. you regularly had the urge to stare at him for long moments of time, and “accidentally” brush your fingers on his when grabbing a pen. sae's gaze flickered to the folded paper on your desk, a curious expression crossed his face, “hey, what’s that?” you looked at the note, it was the second letter, but you couldn’t ouright tell him that, “uh, it’s a grocery list my mom gave me for tomorrow, cause she won’t be here.” and he took it, like that. “oh, okay.” then shrugged it off…
“hey, can you help me with this question?” sae asked, you already knew all the material, since you actually payed attention in class. “sure,” and you leaned over, a bit too close (on purpose), and started helping him with the question. “you get it now?” you asked, after some frustration. “yeah, thanks. you’re actually kinda smart.” he remarked backhandedly, “hey! what’s that supposed to mean? i’m very smart thank you very much! i wouldn’t even be in this situation if you actually paid attention in class. stop focusing on football so much!” you hit him on the head lightly, but in a playful manner. he tried to hit you back, but you dodged, right before your chair tipped backwards and you fell. “guess you could say i fell for you— ow!” then your head got hit, not as lightly by sae. “don’t say stuff like that.”
you faked a sulk for the rest of the time he was there, maybe he’d feel bad for you and kiss you or something. “you gonna keep pouting?” he asked, “yeah. maybe you should leave, you’re ruining my vibe with all this negativity!” you didn’t really mean that, but of course he thought that. sae really didn’t get social cues. “wait! i didn’t actually mean that—” then he shut the door. now you were actually sulking. stupid sae…didn’t even give you a kiss either.
it was day 2 of your plan, you bought a cute little seagull plush keychain and wrote a note to go with it. it read “hey, handsome! just wanna say, you’re a bit dense for not even getting one clue. but keep it up! i believe in ya!” maybe he’d get that ‘handsome’ was something that you’d often say to him…yeah probably not. it was a stretch. you did the same thing, go to school a bit early, put the things and his locker and pretend nothing happened. a part of you wanted this to continue, but the other didn't. there was an urge to tell him you liked him and get it over with. but where was the fun in that?
as you sat in class, you finished your test, which was fairly easy. but you seemed to zone out after that, your mind occupied on how to get sae to realize that it was you. the thought got you frustrated, but pumped out as you wondered what sae's reaction would be to your note. after class, there was a few minutes before the next teacher came in. "hey." sae said as he sat next to you, "soo...what'd ya think?" nudging him playfully with your elbow, his expression nonchalant as ever. "about...?" he asked, "about the test, silly! you think you passed?" he had to be fairly confident, i mean you helped him out. "uh, sure. it was kinda easy." he dismissed it, as always. "it's totally cause i helped you out, right? right?" you teased, "...right, whatever you say."
something seemed to be on sae's mind. maybe it was about the notes. your suspicions were confirmed when he said something, "i got another note today," he mentioned, his expression puzzled. you couldn't contain your excitement as you took the note from him and examined it before giving it back, "wow, another one huh?" you remarked casually, trying to conceal your eagerness. "what's it say?" you asked, your breath hitching in your throat. sae shrugged, clearly confused by the note's contents. "it's just… encouraging me to pay more attention to things," he replied, his brow furrowing in confusion. you tried to avoid yourself from smiling inwardly, knowing that your plan was working. "maybe they're trying to help you out," you suggested playfully, hoping he would catch on to your subtle hints.
despite your frustration, you found it impossible to not admire how clueless sae was, it was adorable, in its own irritating way. you tried to drop hints and flirtatious comments, but he seemed to brush them off without a second thought as you just "joking". but as much as you wanted to reveal the truth, there was a part of you that hesitated. what if sae didn't feel the same way? what if it ruined the friendship you had worked so hard to build? despite all this, you didn't want to give up either. you were so deep into this already.
so, for the rest of every period, your gaze remained fixed to him. thinking on how to confess to him, also admiring him. after a bit of thinking, midterms were the day after sae’s birthday, unfortunately. must suck, must suck even harder because all club activities were canceled for the rest of the week due to midterms too! but, there was a good part to it too, maybe he won’t focus so much on football. after school, before he was going to walk home, you called out his name.
“sae! wait up!” he turned around to see you jogging to him, “what?” sae snapped at you, not too rudely though, a bit annoyed he couldn’t be alone. “you wanna come over to my house to study for midterms? cmon, i know you’re not learning anything in class, as always!” you could see him be reluctant before sighing. “fine, but not today. i’m busy.” fair enough, it was fine, as long as if you got to confess to him on his birthday. “you better not be saying that so you can play football!” you turned to look at him and you saw he was avoiding your gaze. “you’re totally obsessed…” not like you could say anything. you were pretty much obsessed with football too (and him), but not as much.
the atmosphere was kinda awkward after that, so you decided to say something, “did you get another clue to who that person was?” you asked casually, trying to read his expression. “not yet,” he admitted, “but i know it’s someone closer to me. how else would they know seagulls were my favorite animal?” he wondered holding up the keychain, admiring it a bit in the light. “you gonna keep it?” you looked at the keychain as well, hoping he said yes, “yeah, it’s pretty cute. i don’t want to throw something like this away either.” you eyes naturally set on the way his lips curled up ever so slightly, the way his hair fell on his face and caught the sunlight. your face flushed as you scrambled to look away. if you didn’t realize it before, but now was when you realized how much you actually liked him.
“so, this one’s different, huh?” you tried to change the subject, “what do you mean ‘different’?” he asked, raising an eyebrow in curiosity. you fumbled for words, as you thought about if he caught you staring or not, “i mean, normally you throw out any gift and reject every person…what’s so different now?” you swallowed nervously, hoping your words didn't come off too blunt. "i just meant... well, you usually don't keep stuff like this. but this time, you're actually considering it," you explained, trying to sound nonchalant. sae nodded slowly, seeming to think about your observation. "yeah, I guess you're right. It's just... different," he admitted, his gaze shifting to the keychain in his hand. he beat you to saying something else before you could, “it’s like, they’re close to me, right under my fingertip and i want to know who.”
“yeah?” you smiled at him again, admiring his features once more. “hey, hypothetically, if the person was a guy, would you care?” you asked on a whim, “i guess...not really." he replied with a shrug. "why do you ask?" you shrugged nonchalantly, but secretly felt relieved. at least he wouldn't out right reject you. trying to keep your nerves at bay, you tried to justify yourself, "just curious, y'know? it's interesting to think about." sae nodded in agreement, but you could sense a hint of suspicion in his gaze. it made you wonder if he was starting to suspect something, if he was beginning to piece together the puzzle of his secret admirer.
you waved him goodbye as he walked into his house. tomorrow was the weekend, so you couldn't outright give him anything, but you'd still hint at it when he came over to your house to study. that night, you tossed and turned in bed, partly from the thought of confessing, but also how good he looked on the walk back to his house. you rolled around in bed, almost like a middle school girl in a shojo. it wasn't your best of times, but you refrain from the thought of him, and him piecing together the puzzle had you biting your bottom lip in nervousness and excitement.
when saturday came, you paced back and forth in your room, thinking of what to say and do when he came. you felt pretty damn tired, too from last night, barely got a wink of sleep. you mumbled 'don't screw this up' over and over again when you heard a knock at the door. "sae! you made it!" you said with a sigh of relief, at least he didn't ditch you to watch game footage or anything like that, "yeah, i did." you tried to go in for a hug but he quickly dismissed that.
after an hour or so of studying, you got bored so you decided to hint what you were doing for his birthday. “sae, your birthday’s coming up right? october 10th?” you tried to put in the conversation casually, “yeah, why?” he looked at you with some suspicion, "i'm just asking. but, i'm sure you'd love me for my gift" a small, yet cocky smirk crept onto your face, "don't you mean i'd love 'it'?" he expressed, some more suspicion in his tone, "oh no, i know what i meant, you're gonna love me." he sighed in defeat, he knew there was no point in pushing it further.
so, that's basically how it went for the next few days. him being stupidly oblivious, you trying to drop the hint even further. you got nowhere, on wednesday, the day before his birthday, you decided to give him a flower. not an overly big bouquet, you'd probably save that for the actual confession, instead, you opted for a single flower. it was a flower he'd seen before, and that you knew he liked. there was a vase with a single flower in your room, his eyes consistently focused on it. it was a light pink hydrangea, it was beautiful, so you understood why he stared at it often. maybe he'd understand then. you decided to take the one that was in your room, when he came over that day, maybe he'd ask why the vase was empty and get the god damn hint already,
as per usual, you went early, dropped the gift off, and went off. there wasn't any note this time, as you were kinda sick of writing them. plus, the big day was tomorrow, you'd save every pent up emotion for then. you waited for him in the courtyard, when you spotted him in the courtyard examining the flower you went up to greet him. "hey, sae! looks like you got a flower now, huh?" you wrapped an arm around his shoulder to break him out of his trance, "yeah. this is the same flower that's in your room, right?" at least he got the hint, you pretended to study it for a bit before replying, "hm, yeah, it is. funny ain't it? maybe they know you really well." you looked at sae to gauge his expression, he did a simple nod and kept his blank expression. you clenched your fists in frustration as sae brushed off your flirtatious comment, a knot forming in your stomach. whatever, he'd have another shot when he went to your house anyway.
you were right, because when he went to your room, he noticed the empty vase immediately. "the flower is missing." he pointed out, "gave it to someone real special" you looked at him as you said that, "it was a nice flower, you should've gave it to me...but i can't really complain if they're that special to you..." you were instictively drawn to the way sae's expression softened when he talked about the flower, a hint of vulnerability shining through his normally neutral face.
you stared at him in a 'are you serious?' look. well yeah, you did give it to him, and he was special, "sorry, was that rude?" sae took note of your expression, "oh no no, it's something else," you quickly went back to focusing, "let's just cram for midterms" you muttered, hoping to divert the conversation away from your failed attempt at dropping another hint. you couldn't help but feel a twinge of disappointment that sae didn't seem to catch on to your subtle gestures. but you pushed those feelings aside and focused on studying for midterms.
nothing special happened, just some plain ol' cramming. but, you failed to focus on it. all your thoughts went to the day tomorrow. the thought had you feeling all sorts of emotions. sae noticed your unusual quietness and said something on the matter, "is something wrong? you're being awfully quiet." you felt yourself tense up, "just nervous for midterms...don't wanna fail...haha..." you made a pathetic excuse of a lie, he narrowed his eyes a bit, trying to examine your actions before ultimately deciding to drop it. at a desperate attempt to change the subject you decided to point something out that you noticed, "hey, the bracelets you normally wear, you don't wear them anymore," you pointed out, "oh, i lost them. hadn't gotten the chance to get new ones." you kept that in mind, you'd probably get him a new bracelet for his birthday.
you could barely sleep that night, you stayed up thinking what'd you say, do, act. everything had to be perfect, it probably wouldn't end up that way, but you tried your best. a voice popped up in your head that made you not even want to confess in the first place. it said the same things that made you reluctant before, 'what if he didn't like me back? what if i ruined our friendship?' what if this and that. but what if he actually liked you back, and everything turned out even better than you hoped? every thought was about the next day, it made your head spin. after a bit of staying up, you realized being all tired and having eye backs wasn't cute and a good look for a confession, so you forced yourself to sleep.
on the morning of sae's birthday, you woke up with a flurry of emotions swirling inside you. today was the day you would finally reveal your feelings to him. you couldn't focus on anything else, not even the midterms the next day. every thought was consumed by sae and the confession that awaited. as the day progressed, you found it increasingly difficult to contain your excitement. you kept glancing at the clock, counting down the hours until you could see sae and tell him how you felt. It felt like time was moving at a snail's pace, each minute dragging on endlessly. you went to his locker and put in the last note, 'meet me at the rooftop at 7:30'. it was short and straight to the point, no cryptic messages or hints.
you stood at the rooftop, your back leaning on the railing. your palms felt sweaty and you could hear your heartbeat get louder. your mind was full of feelings you wanted to get out. you were looking up at the sky to get your mind off of everything. the scenery was beautiful, you were lost in it until you heard the sound of the door opening, and there you saw him. the man you've liked since forever. his face was a mix of a lot of emotions, it was hard to read, to be honest.
as sae stepped onto the rooftop, the setting sun casting a warm glow around him, your heart skipped a beat. you felt the breath get sucked out of your lungs, he looked stunning, more than usual, actually. "hey, sae," you began, your voice trembling slightly with nervousness but filled with anticipation. "i'm so glad you actually came." his eyes widened in surprise, his gaze flickering between you and the breathtaking view spread out before him. "it was you?" he breathed, his voice tinged with disbelief. you chuckled nervously, your fingers fidgeting with the delicate bracelet you had carefully chosen for him.
"surprise…? if it wasn't obvious enough…" you paused, your heart pounding in your chest as you took a step closer to him. "there's something I've been wanting to tell you," you confessed, your voice soft but determined. with trembling hands, you slipped the bracelet onto his wrist, the cool metal contrasting with the warmth of his skin. "i really like you, sae," you whispered, your gaze locked with his. "it's been this way for a while, but I never had the chance to say anything." you reached out, presenting him with the bouquet of pale pink hydrangeas, their soft petals illuminated by the fading light. "these are for you," you said softly, a shy smile playing on your lips.
taking in a deep breath, you continued, your voice filled with sincerity and vulnerability. "i've been dropping hints since the beginning of time and i was hoping you'd catch on, but i realized i had to take matters into my own hands. i needed to tell you how i felt eventually. sae's eyes softened as he listened to your heartfelt confession, his expression shifting from surprise to something warmer, something more tender. "i…i didn't realize," he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper. "i never knew you felt this way." you took a step closer, your heart pounding in your ear with anticipation as you reached your hand out to gently cup his cheek.
"i've been waiting for this moment for so long..." you admitted, your voice barely audible over the soft rustle of the breeze, "to finally tell you how much you meant to me. so please, can i be your boyfriend?" you gazed directly into his eyes, waiting for the dreadful answer. as you waited for sae's response, the tension in the air seemed to thicken, every passing moment feeling like an eternity. sae's gaze softened as he took in your confession, his eyes reflecting a mixture of surprise, uncertainty, and something else you couldn't quite place. you held your breath, your heart pounding in your chest as you awaited his answer.
finally, after what felt like an eternity, sae's lips curled into a gentle smile, a warmth spreading across his features. "know that i know how you feel, i don't want to waste anymore time." your heart skipped a beat as you felt a surge of hope and anticipation wash over you. could it be…? "sae," you whispered, your voice barely audible over the gentle hum of the wind, "what do you mean?" a soft chuckle escaped sae's lips as he took a step closer to you, his eyes sparkling with newfound clarity and determination. "i mean… i want to be more than just friends," he confessed, his voice steady and sure. "i want to be with you, too."
you felt excited and shocked and every other emotion there was out there. you uttered a single word, "really?" your heart felt like it was about to explode out of joy. sae nodded, his smile widening as he leaned in closer, his forehead resting against yours. "really," he whispered, his breath warm against your skin. "i've been blind for so long, but now that i see… i don't want to let you go." you wanted to cry, that's what. "you're so stupid for not seeing this...i never want to let you go too..." your voice trembled, you sniffled while saying it too.
"i'm sorry. i really am." he admitted, and without another word sae closed the distance between you two. time stopped, it was as simple as that. everything went to a halt as you tried to process what happened. the kiss was sweet and simple, just as you two liked it. in that moment, surrounded by the soft glow of the setting sun and the gentle rustle of the breeze, everything else faded away, leaving only the two of you lost in the sweetness of the moment. you pulled away after what felt like ages.
"happy birthday sae," you said softly, your voice at a barely audible level. "you're right, i did love you for this gift. thanks for everything." he smiled, his face totally different from his usual unemotional look. "no problem and," you held your breath for the next words you were about to say, "i love you." you felt at peace, you finally said what you've always wanted to say, "i love you too."
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meowzfordayz · 7 months
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NSFW Alphabet — Tomioka Giyuu
Author’s Note: ~1.5 months after starting this (and ~3 months since it was supposed to be started 🥴), and it’s finally finished !!!!! 🥳 If these were shorter headcanons, then they wouldn’t take so long 😅, but each individual letter is a labor of love (and lust 😏). As w/ all hcs, these are simply my opinions in this exact moment of writing, and are subject to change depending on the context/my mood! 😉
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NSFW Alphabet — Tomioka Giyuu
Tomioka Giyuu x Reader
Word Count: ~3,500
CW: 18+NSFW, explicit language, Fem!Reader, oral, rimming, spit
MILESTONE 20.0
~faqs~
Aftercare? what they’re like after sex
Giyuu’s very sleepy after sex. If you’ve discussed it beforehand, then he’ll muster up the energy to gently towel wash you, brush your hair (if things got ~intense 😉), and make sure you drink a glass of water, but he’s otherwise hopeless. And by “hopeless”, I mean: he’s passing out with his cock still leaking onto your thighs, warm mouth smooshed into your shoulder, and will moan softly—Hnngg—and proceed to roll over should you attempt to wake him. 😌
Body Part? their favorite body part(s)
Giyuu’s a thigh guy, or GTTG (Giyuu The Thigh Guy) for short. 🦵 Don’t get me wrong! He could totally cum fixating on basically any part of your body 🫢, buuut nestled between your thighs… life couldn’t get much better. 😌 He isn’t huge on marking you (aka: he is, but he typically refrains because one hickey is a sure slide to two, then four, then seven, then- 😇), but biting softly at your thigh, listening to you squeal, halfheartedly attempting to push him away as his fingers wrap around your knees, tongue slipping out to soothe your fresh “wound” — he’s entertained himself with your thighs for literal hours, and not necessarily even sexually. 😆 He’ll often push your legs apart just so he can rest his head on the plush of your thigh, the rest of his body cradled by the curves of your knees and calves.
If you were a vampire, then Giyuu would surely be your first victim, because his neck is just: 😍😋🩸❣️ It’s kissable, nuzzle-able, biteable, and sooo fun to rile him up with a simple swipe of your tongue (bonus points if you suck on his Adam’s apple 🤤). He smells delicious too; a gentle, unassuming fragrance of ripples on a pond (whatever those smell like 🌊) that’s strongest where his neck meets his ears. Step in close and interlock your fingers behind his neck, and he’s certain to wrap his arms around your waist, surroundings fading to a hazy buzz as he murmurs, “I love you.”
Cum?
Giyuu loves cum while he’s still horny (something about the way it glistens and slides down the backs of your thighs, collecting in droplets on your puffy folds, slightly watery and warm as it slowly dampens the mattress beneath you… he’s fixated for sure 😌), but as soon as post nut clarity hits, he’s desperate for a shower (something about its smell and stickiness, clinging to your skin—and his—reminding him of how amazing you felt… and of how messy things got… if you’re taking too long to collect yourself, then he’s scooping you up and carrying you to the bathroom for sure 🫠).
Dirty Talk?
He loves dirty talk, but has to pass a certain threshold (of horniness) to really ~get into it. 😅 Before that threshold, a simple So pretty baby while straddling his hips, your fingertips stroking his softly toned abs, will guarantee you a blushing, flustered Tomioka Giyuu, his own grip tightening around your waist. And after that threshold? 👀 Best believe you’ll be the flustered one, low whimpers pushed out of your chest as a cool hand rests gentle around your throat, steadying your body while his cock fucks needy and forceful into your warm, clenching hole.
Experience? their level of experience
Before meeting you, Giyuu isn’t a virgin, but he’s also far from experienced. He knows how to have sex, knows how to make someone else cum, but he doesn’t know how to enjoy himself. He’s always been physically sensitive—always quick to orgasm with enough wetness and friction—but physical pleasure without its emotional counterpart only does so much. And then he falls in love with you. 🥺💙 He falls in love with how delicately you kiss the tops of his shoulder, across his collarbones, tongue swirling in the hollow of his throat. Falls in love with how easily you raise goosebumps on his forearms, his thighs, your fingertips grazing lightly—teasingly—along the seams of his clothing, toying with the buttons on his shirt, the zipper on his pants, not willing to undress him unless he begs. In love with how begging means catching your wrists and holding them above your head, brought to neediness by your tender ministrations, safe enough to seek his own desires in the heat of your breathlessness. “I want to cum,” he whispers gruffly, your pulse warm in his palms, “So help me.”
Foreplay?
Giyuu thoroughly enjoys foreplay, to the extent that he has trouble lasting through it. 😅 He actually fares better when you go down on him, because he can guide your movements and pace. His large hands—normally cool to the touch and tender in their intentions—firmly cup your nape, sweaty and needy as your hair tangles soft between his fingers. When you choke on the sensation of his cock nudging against the back of your throat, he can only whimper and groan, hips chasing the quiver and wetness of your breath, grip ensuring you remain planted between his thighs. And when he’s close to cumming? He’s strong enough to gently tug you away from him, your lips shiny and insatiable, a low whine kissing his skin as you pout. But when he goes down on you? That same attention dissipates. Lost in the heat and clench of your thighs, the ache in his scalp as you cling to his hair, the incoherent babble of pleasure spilling from your mouth while you tremble and arch before him… is it really his fault for cumming with you? 🙃 After all, you didn’t stop him from thrusting his hips into the mattress, the edge of the couch, his own fist, as he flicked his tongue over your clit. You didn’t stop him as he whispered about how Beautiful, Stunning, Divine, Fuck… I think I’m gonna cum… you were, your moans rising in pitch as you met his dazed expression, his eyes dark and determined, the tip of his nose glistening with your essence. You didn’t stop him as his body shuddered before you, his cum splurting sticky and pearlescent, the taste of your orgasm gushing tart and warm onto his tongue.
Goofy? their sense of humor
In the beginning, Giyuu’s uber serious… mostly because he’s worried about dying of embarrassment should he fumble while trying to get/keep you in the mood. 🫠 That’s not to say he’s incapable of smiling! He doesn’t want you to think he’s having a terrible time either. 🥴 But gosh forbid he accidentally fart, or nudge himself against the wrong hole, or elbow you in the face, or- 😭 Eventually, however, he slips into a deeper comfort and trust with you, which inevitably leads to him smooshing your hair, chuckling when you queef, and taking a breather when you become literally tangled in the sheets (you can’t stop laughing, and he somehow finds himself grinning adoringly at you vs running out the door in mortification). 🥺
Hair? pubes maintenance
Giyuu keeps himself well groomed due more to habit and personal comfort, but hey — you benefit too! Plus, you know you’ve reached peak closeness when you’re showering together and you randomly ask, “My love, could I trim your pubes tonight?” and instead of shoving you out of the shower, curtain rod and all, he just blushes a deep red and mutters, “Yeah, okay.” 😶
Intimacy? their degree of intimacy
Intimacy and Giyuu are a complicated duo. 😅 On one hand, Giyuu definitely isn’t casual; casual and physical closeness, casual and feelings, casual and sex, are not how he prefers to pair such concepts. But intimacy is difficult for him too, because intimacy means trusting, and trusting means revealing his nakedness — not just undressing his lover. While you know from the get go that you aren’t just a one night stand, friends with benefits, or connected in some other vaguely defined manner, you also initially aren’t entirely sure exactly how deeply rooted his intentions and desires are. After all, he’s shy about meeting your gaze, keeps the lights dim, and hardly moans or closes his eyes… until you finally, finally ask him about it. “Giyuu, what am I to you?” 🥺 “I don’t understand.” 🙃 “I… well, I feel like when we have sex, you make love to me, but I somehow can’t make love to you.” He doesn’t properly answer you, seconds from dreamland after tiredly wiping his cum off your thighs 😴, but he was listening, and the next time he finds himself sliding slowly into you, he cracks a smile—rather than glance away—when you catch him in his contented daze. 💓
Jack Off? masturbation
Giyuu goes through phases of jerking off every day of the week to not touching himself for upwards of a month. There’s no pattern to the duration or frequency of each phase, and he doesn’t really consciously think about it either. Sometimes he’s horny, and other times he’s just not. That being said, solo masturbation and sexual acts with others (others being you) are separate entities to him. Whether he just came that same morning, or hasn’t cum alone in a couple of weeks, he’s always more than willing to feel your pretty cunt (or throat, or hands, because he’s not about to be picky) flutter and squeeze around his cock.
Kink? ~specific turn ons
Lace. 😍 Giyuu knows lace is often rough and uncomfortable 🥲, but there’s just something divine about seeing your breasts in lace and satin; about running calloused palms up your scantily clad thighs (if you ever want to buy a(nother) garter, then Giyuu will always hand you his credit card — no questions asked 😌), snapping your frilly waistband against your plush, warm hips; lapping at the delicate material covering your nipples till they’re perky and damp, gushing about You’re absolutely stunning and Can’t decide if I’d rather fuck you with these beautiful panties on or off. Sometimes, he’ll literally stop and stare (or make you ~model for him 😵‍💫), breath caught in his chest at how perfectly the floral embroidery matches your eyes; at how ethereal and whimsical you appear, the facade of angelic elegance dissipating as you perch on all fours before him, teasing fingers tugging at the sorry excuse of a string between your cheeks. “The longer you wait, the more likely I am to ruin these panties,” you purr, craning your neck to stare over your shoulder at his awestruck expression, “You wouldn’t want that, hm? Wouldn’t want me to have to buy a new set of lace for you?” Spoiler alert: of course he wants you to buy another set of lace for him 😖, but he quite likes your current set too 🥴, so he’s quick to lean over you, mouth messy and hot as he kisses you thoroughly, clever hand slipping underneath you to cup and knead your tit while his other maintains his balance on the mattress.
Location? where they prefer to have sex
Call him basic, but Giyuu likes having sex in bed. 🤗 It’s comfortable, safe, and a sturdy headboard (+ a couple of velcro straps and/or handcuffs) can make it not-so-vanilla too. He’s the reason you have so many pillows, because while he’s okay with taking one for the team and sleeping in any cum spots 🫡, he refuses to sleep on a stained pillow (understandable 😝). As a man who gets extra sleepy after sex, changing sheets/pillowcases usually isn’t in the cards for him, so he’d rather just have plenty of pillows and swap them out when necessary.
Motivation? ~general turn ons
Being nice to him. Giyuu’s got a bit of a praise kink, albeit less so that he’ll get go from zero to erection emergency zone if you compliment him 😆, and more so that he remembers your kindness and attentiveness throughout the day, and returns your care and affection tenfold at night 😉. He also appreciates clean and tidy nails, genuine smiles (although your fake laughter—when not targeted at him—does make him chuckle 🫢), and when you playfully tug his hair to redirect his focus. “Oi, babe, I said left,” you huff amusedly, pointing across the street. He nods slowly, smirking faintly as he promptly continues heading in the wrong direction (if only to get you to tug on his hair again 😌). 
No? turn offs
Giyuu’s pretty flexible. 😌 He can be kinky (after reading a dozen or so ~articles about how exactly to go about exploring X kink), he can be vanilla, but he isn’t into cheating/cuckolding. 😓 Not even for a roleplay scenario. He could be (pretty easily) discussed into having a threesome, or simply a voyeuristic counterpart 👀, but No. Cheating. He trusts that you love him, and he knows he loves you, but it just feels a lil too real to even think about, let alone play out. 😕
Oral? giver or receiver
Giyuu tends to be the receiver, because he has a 50/50 chance of lasting through foreplay whenever he’s the giver. 😶 That being said, he doesn’t exactly have a ~preference, and definitely doesn’t perceive giving oral sex to be a chore, annoying, or tiresome — he just doesn’t want to disappoint you by cumming too soon should you still desire penetrative sex after oral sex. 
Position? their favorite position(s)
Doggystyle, because Giyuu can’t get enough of hearing his thighs slap against yours. 🫢 From cupping the tops of your thighs and pulling your body toward him to both steady himself and fuck deeper into your cunt, to gripping the inside of your thighs to spread your legs farther apart while spitting lazily on your back Fuck, so fucking filthy for me, to listening to how sweaty and eager you are as your skin clings and claps to his, doggystyle is easily his favorite. A close second, when either of you are feeling too lazy for doggystyle, would be missionary, because once again, Giyuu can use your thighs to pull you closer and spread you wider (and his spit + your boobs = ✨shiny boobs✨). 
Quickie? a fan or not-a-fan
Giyuu isn’t a huge fan of quickies (not enough time to devour you whole), but your first few times together were quick nonetheless. 😏💀 After he’s gotten over his initial awe (let’s be honest tho — he never really gets over it 😍), he’s better about not ~accidentally making everything a quickie 😝, but you lowkey still have him wrapped around your finger. 😇 In other words, Giyuu doesn’t like ‘em, but you have the power to create them whenever you so desire. 😎😂
Risk? their risk tolerance
Low risk tolerance. 🙃 In theory, Giyuu isn’t against sexual risk taking (i.e. semi public sex), but in practice, he gets too flustered-embarrassed-mortified-at-the-thought-of-being-caught 🫣 to actually follow through. If you casually mention how hot it would be If you pressed me up against this wall and slipped your hand under my skirt to feel how wet I am, then he’ll do the press-you-up-against-the-wall part 😏, but will shakily vice grip the hem of your skirt, unable to continue (he wants to 😭, but just can’t 🥴). 
Stamina?
In terms of how long Giyuu can fuck you in a single position before his muscles give out? He has practically unlimited stamina. 😎 His lanky, lithe physique isn’t purely for show y’know! 😉 It’s for holding you up against a wall, cock thrusting upward into your dripping cunt as your nails dig crescent moons into his shoulders, his face buried in your neck as he focuses intently on the slick, lewd sound of his balls tapping your pretty asshole. And for holding you up above him while you straddle his hips, your legs cramping from exhaustion—Aw darling, can’t ride me any longer?—adoration in his eyes as he begins fucking roughly into your pussy, delirious on how willingly you allow him to pleasure your body. However, in terms of how long Giyuu can fuck you before he cums? … … … he’s working on it. 🫠 That being said, he makes up for premature orgasms with potential quantity! 😏 If you’re feeling especially horny, then he can usually manage an orgasm morning, noon, and night 🥰 — just don’t expect much out of him the following day. 😵‍💫😂
Toys?
Giyuu might be a lil jealous of them. 🤪 Not actually, he’s not that insecure of himself and your relationship… but you could totally rile him up by starting without him, winking exaggeratedly with your favorite vibrator grazing your clit as he walks into the bedroom, giggling when he promptly plops onto the bed beside you, still fully clothed, hand nudging you and your toy out of his way as he grumbles halfheartedly, “So I guess I didn’t need to hurry up the stairs after all, you’ve got everything taken care of.” 😔 Your failsafe solution? Gently grasp his noticeable bulge, and declare, “Clearly not everything, seeing as I’ve yet to solve this problem.” 😌😉😏😎 Will he cringe at your cheesiness? Yes. 🥴 Will he also frantically begin unzipping and kicking off his pants? Also yes. 😳
Unfair? how they feel about teasing/being teased
Tease at your own discretion, because Giyuu can not handle it. 😃 He enjoys it! But his imagination does wonders at filling in the blanks you’re leaving, and if you’re not careful, then he might just spill over before you’re ready! 😅 Teasing you goes pretty much the same, because as much as he tries to convince himself that you’re the one he’s edging, truly, he’s edging both of you, and he’s too in love with you to not succumb to his own delicate, torturous charm. 🙃💞
Volume?
Quiet and breathy, or desperate and babbling, with no in between. Push him far enough, and he’ll murmur filth nonstop (most of it incoherent 😅) until he’s shaking and cumming, or bask in the soft glow of his occasional grunts and low hisses. Sex in the morning is usually near silent, but sex in the evening frequently brings out the singular, guttural groan that always accompanies his hardest orgasms. 
Wild Card?
On rare occasions, Giyuu rims you. The stuttered, needy whine, and the feeling of your pussy tightening around his cock, whenever he brushes the pad of his thumb over your asshole do not go unnoticed by him, so he can only imagine how sensitive and gorgeous you would feel and sound if the tip of his tongue replaced his wandering hands — and he’s proven ~right when he rims you for the first time, and you practically wail at the hot wetness of his mouth. So good for me, letting me eat your pretty ass he rasps, spit bridging from his chin to your ass cheeks, your thighs quivering in his grip, drooling onto your pillow as you rock your hips backward toward his slick, skillful tongue What a fucking treat, getting to taste you here.
X-ray?
Giyuu’s cock is pretty. 7” erect, somewhat slim, with a fat and squishy tip that beads precum like it’s modeling for an advertisement. Its length always catches you off guard because it doesn’t look especially big (think cute twink vs beefy jock), but as he slowly pushes himself in a couple inches, pulls out till his tip catches at your entrance, and then slowly pushes himself in a couple inches farther than before, you can’t help but gasp. “Are you okay?” he asks softly, voice low and thick in his throat, eyes gleaming as he watches himself disappear into your luscious cunt, your body presented to him so stunning on your chest and knees. “Fuck,” is your graceful response, face buried in the mattress, back arching forward with every shallow thrust, “So deep.” He’d chuckle at your cliche whimper if he wasn’t so focused on not cumming, his hands cupping your hips in an attempt to handle you tenderly, the desperate clinging of your walls sucking away his self control as he slips farther, farther, deeper into your heat.
Yearning? sex drive
Horny, and by horny, I mean 24/7. Giyuu’s so used to it though (the perpetual state of being borderline turned on), that it doesn’t exactly feel like horny. He could fuck whenever (albeit, not necessarily wherever), but doesn’t need to (he’s a grown man y’know, he has ~some control 😉). This is a problem at first, because he refrains from initiating (afraid of scaring you away with his sex drive 😬)—to the point where you worry that you’re pressuring him into being physically intimate—but as soon as you communicate your concern, he’s quick (and embarrassed 😶) to assure you that I’m horny all the time. Do you want me to fuck you all the time? 😐 You might jokingly say Duh!, but his sentiment registers nonetheless. ☺️
Zzz?
🎵out like a light🎶 Morning sex? Giyuu’s taking a five minute power nap. 😴 Afternoon sex? Giyuu’s taking a thirty minute cat nap. 😴 Evening sex? Giyuu’s going to sleep. 😴 He does his best to check in with you vs straight up knocking out, but unless something urgent arises (i.e. intense feelings, physical pains, etc), he’s not someone to rely on after he cums. Of course, he can ~technically orgasm and then continue his day without conking out, but his resulting moodiness/distractedness takes a while to wear off whenever that happens.
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writingseaslugs · 2 years
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Diasomnia Romantic Headcanons
Writing Diasomnia was a struggle. I even read up to the first chapter of Book 6 and all their Vignettes and still had some trouble. I love them all, though. Also big shoutout to @treysimp for helping me with Sebek. They explained their thoughts on him, which helped me get the writing flow going. 
A quick heads up when it comes to Lilia’s last bullet point…this is a headcanon. It’s how I perceive the character going off what he says in-game. I go into a little more detail in my post about how I see the world, but ya. Just a heads up, I think Lilia can change his form, and the one he presents in the game isn’t indeed what he looks like.
Disclaimer: All characters in this series is aged up. For more information about my version of this world and the type of reader you can expect, please do a quick read of THIS post. Beta read by Grammarly and it’s trying its best.
Heartslabyul | Savanaclaw | Octavinelle | Scarabia | Pomefiore | Ignihyde | Diasomnia (You’re Here)
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Romantic Headcanons
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Malleus Draconia
Malleus is originally going to find you interesting in the fact that, unlike every human on campus, you hold no fear in your eyes when you first see him. To you, he was just another mysterious student on campus. You even gave him a nickname that, to most, might’ve been embarrassing, but to him, it just meant you didn’t know who he was. He can just talk to you freely, which is like a breath of fresh air for him…he almost doesn’t want you to find out who he really is at first, but that feeling would probably quickly leave him. If this child of man was afraid after hearing his real name, it isn’t worth his time.
Your nightly conversations outside of Ramshackle dorm are going to slowly evolve into walking around campus with Malleus under the cover of shadows. You never run into any students on these walks, and Malleus is more than happy to tell you about every single Gargoyle there is on campus during your walks. He even points out a statue or two that’s supposed to imitate the Gargoyles to create symmetry but doesn’t actually serve any purpose. You’re going to be finding out a lot about the school, but that’s fine. His voice is so soothing you could probably listen to it all day. You find it odd when he begins guiding you in a different direction on your walks, almost as if he’s trying to avoid someone.
Malleus is going to realize he has it down bad for you at the festival when you discover who he actually is, only to immediately continue calling him by that silly nickname you gave him. He’s more than happy to let you continue using it, don’t get him wrong; he finds it wonderful that your demeanor didn’t change. His feelings for you only begin to increase, especially when he forges a nightly visit, only to have you at the door of his dorm asking to see if he has time for an evening stroll. It was then that he realizes that this child of man is something else.
Malleus has an imposing aura surrounding him at all times, which wards off anything from trying to cause you any harm. You’re one of the most protected students at the school at this point. Of course, Lilia will also be watching over you from the corner of his eyes when he spots you in the hallways. Silver and Sebek will also be careful around you and stop anyone from trying to cause a ruckus. Nobody at the school knows why these three members of Diasomnia are now so protective over you since it’s not exactly common knowledge that you’re one of Malleus’s close friends.
Despite Malleus knowing he seems to like his child of man, he probably won’t be doing anything about it. Lilia had always spoken about fleeting crushes and how they develop, and this is what Malleus assumes it will be. A simple “crush” that he will soon get over and continue being friends with you. He’s mainly going to be thinking this way because he simply doesn’t know the first thing in courting a human or how they show their affection. To him, you’ve never once shown romantic interest, and he’d rather not push that on you if you weren’t interested. Lilia is the one that has to point out to Malleus that the human is very clearly interested in him and almost breaks out a power-point of all the times you’ve seemingly done something to flirt with him, only for him to think of it as a friendly human gesture.
Once he’s made aware of this fact, he’s going to begin courting you in a more fae-like manner, which can be very confusing for you. Once again, Lilia is going to have to jump in. It’s almost painful for the “old man” to watch this awkward flirting where neither party realizes what’s going on. Lilia will probably corner you and explain flirting with the fae, and once it clicks, it’s go time. The easiest way to let Malleus know you return the feelings is simple. Either flat out tell him or ask him to lean down closer so you can tell him something, then grab the lapels of his jacket and give him a kiss. It’s very clear in the message you’re sending.
Malleus is going to always have some form of physical contact going with you when you’re together. Normally it’s a single hand on you, on the small of your back, as he guides you places. Sometimes he requests your hand, or he lets you hook your arm around his as you two continue. When you’re sitting there, one hand might be on your thigh, mindlessly rubbing circles into it. He enjoys holding these small moments of contact with you, and feeling your warmth radiating gives him a sense of calm.
Since Malleus is normally never seen outside of classes, people don’t know you two are going out. Even if you mentioned dating Malleus, students would laugh in your face and call you a liar. Not like it really matters to you whether they believe you, but if they were going to laugh, then why ask if you were seeing someone? Everyone sings a whole new tune one day when you ask Malleus to walk you to class since you wanna see him more in school. He always holds his arm out like a gentleman for you to grab onto. Everyone in the hall is going to be staring in shock until Sebek begins shouting and biting their heads off while Silver tries to reel him in. Despite all that, it still makes for a pretty cute scene in your mind.
He is very much in love with giving you kisses all the time. Sometimes just quick pecks when he sees fit or a kiss on the hand or forehead. His favorite is bending down and tilting your chin to meet his own. Leaning over for a kiss and barely brushing your lips before standing back to his full height. Nobody is taller than Malleus (and if you are, praise be). So there’s a good chance if he teases you with a kiss and then stands up, you’d have to climb that man like a tree to get a proper smooch for him. If you actually attempt that, he’ll be laughing at you before helping support your weight as he picks you up and smothers you in kisses.
He’s very much into physical touch, so cuddling is going to be something to get used to. He might bring one of his special pillows and keep it over at Ramshackle for his horns. Either way, he’ll be pulling you against him, either spooning you, letting you spoon him, or his personal favorite, laying on his back with you pulled on top of him, your head resting on his chest. His chin will be right on your head while he holds you and talks about his day, or he partakes in his favorite activity, which is listening to whatever crazy shenanigans you’ve been up to. He’ll do this until you’re asleep on him and just spend the night. He knows Lilia will deal with his overprotective bodyguards.
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Lilia Vanrouge
Lilia was intrigued by you at first. This little human is now taking residency in the old abandoned building with no magic and a monster as their only friend. Not to mention how easy it was for him to scare you the first few times with your lack of knowledge of magic. Teleportation was a new concept to you, and Lilia loved to use it to spook you. He had been serious the first time he met when he offered you a spot at the table to talk to them. He just never expected that this jumpy human would soon be the object of his affection, but when Lilia realized the feeling inside his chest, he knew he couldn’t deny it.
At first, nothing is going to change with him and how he acts around you. The only real difference is coming over to you more and more often. Popping up behind you and teasing about how easy it was to startle you. Even playing mind games and sometimes tricking you. He founds your reactions to always be refreshing, especially your problem-solving skills. While most students would default to using magic to solve their problems, you had to actually use your head and figure them out. So riddles and mind games were a personal favorite of Lilia’s to try out with you.
Soon Lilia will be inviting you to the dorms more and more often. Normally under the guise of how it’ll be fun, and maybe you could try out some of his newest creations. Not to mention Malleus has taken a liking to you, so of course, it makes sense to visit the dorm where it’s safe. Just be expecting that whatever Lilia offers you that day, whether it be a board game or him cooking…that’s going to happen. So on days he offers to prepare you a home-cooked meal that he slaved over…maybe avoid visiting. Or do and try your luck and not die. Maybe you could convince him to let you cook with him and try to salvage whatever atrocity he’s trying to whip up.
You’re not going to realize it until it’s too late, but Lilia has been slowly making you swoon this entire time. Even those soft and lingering touches will be melded inside your mind for quite a while. Once Lilia notices that you’re finally falling, he’s going to keep teasing you more and more. He’s going to make it so obvious that he’s clearly in love with you that even if you’re the densest person on the planet, you’re going to know. He won’t confess, though. No, he’s going to keep this up until you reach a breaking point and confess yourself. Just expect him to call you cute and squish your cheeks before kissing you in a response to your heartfelt confession.
Be prepared for even more teasing once you’re in a relationship with him. His biggest source of entertainment is to make you as flustered as possible. He finds you too cute to not tease you all the time. He’s also going to make fun of how you’re clearly into older men and will verbally ponder if he needs to be worried about you being around Trein since you “Clearly have a thing for Dilfs.” It’s okay to smack him for that, or you can just go along with the teasing and inform him that you’ve only had “fleeting thoughts” about doing that. Those responses are why Lilia fell for you in the first place, after all.
Depending on his mood for the day, he might offer you up his arm in the hallway when walking with you to classes. On other days, he might be the one clinging to your arm. It really does depend on a day-to-day basis. If you’re shorter than him, he might make it difficult to walk by being right behind you with his chin on top of your head. Your feet will practically be on top of his as he guides the way and laughs at your struggle. If you’re taller, then he’s going to be floating to do the same exact thing, but he might float just a bit higher to rest his arms on top of your head as well. Might even pinch your cheeks if you’re frowning at his antics to get you to laugh along with the ridiculous scene.
Lilia is going to be playing a game with you where he tells you some outlandish story from the way in the past and then asks if he was telling the truth or not. He’ll be on his toes as he awaits a response, wondering if you’ll guess right. The trick is that he’s always telling the truth. All those insane stories, you sit there thinking, “No way this happened in history.” Did indeed happen. He might even have a few photographs to show you. His stories never cease to entertain you, but you wish he wouldn’t tell you random facts about a period of time when you’re also learning the same thing in history. Not because they’re not fun stories…but when you take the test and realize you have to struggle between written history and Lilia’s memories…well, it can get muddles in your head.
Upside-down kisses. The bat dad is going to sometimes pop up upside down in front of you only to give you a smooch before leaving. You’re always going to be in a daze when this happens, and if it’s in front of your friends, they’re going to be so confused as to what they witnessed. Lilia is very much into PDA, but he does remember to keep it appropriate. He won’t be stealing breathless kisses that leave your legs feeling like jelly in public. Small kisses, though, or wrapping an arm around you are on the table.
He’s big into cuddling with you. At Diasomnia, it’s either you’re in his lap, or he’s in your lap. The same goes for Ramshackle, and his favorite moments are getting to go to bed with you while you’re in each other's arms. Lilia tends to cling to things in his sleep, so even if you are asleep on opposite ends of the bed, in the morning, you two will appear more like a pretzel. Sometimes you’ll even go to bed alone, and in the middle of the night, Lilia teleports into your room and crawls under the covers with you. Waking up to his face when you know for a fact he wasn’t there when you went to bed can be shocking, but not unwelcome at how peaceful he looks asleep (even if he’s a big faker because we know he woke up the moment you shifted).
It’s known that Lilia likes to use his boyishly good looks to get things, and most of the time, he’s just playing around. When he mentions he can change up how he looks at will, it makes you wonder a few things. Mainly if this cute boyish look he’s got going on is what he really looks like. Voice it, and he’ll laugh before dragging you to his room and making you close your eyes. When they open, you’re going to notice a few things. Number one, his hair is surprisingly long. Number two, his features are a lot sharper, and instead of boyishly good looks, he now has a more regal appearance. The most notable difference? Lilia…are you the same height as Malleus…or are you taller?
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Sebek Zigvolt
He’s not going to realize he likes you at all. He just assumes that his heart races when he’s around you is an adrenaline response since normally when he’s with you, something always happens. He just assumes his body has adapted to it. Is his face going red when you compliment him? Clearly, you have some sort of cold, and you’ve managed to give it to him in .5 seconds, and now he’s ill. It’s not a blush, he’s burning up from a deadly fever that you give him whenever you’re around that also happens to go away when you disappear. Perhaps it’s a curse of some kind. Clearly, it’s not his own infatuation with you.
Oddly enough, it’s not Lilia who has to interfere this time around; it’s Silver. It’s painful for everyone close to Sebek to watch the utter denial he is in at having a crush on you. So Silver is the one who explains to Sebek that you don’t have a fever curse cast on you, and it’s not adrenaline that he keeps blaming it on. He simply has a crush on the Ramshackle prefect.
Even more denial over the fact that he’s crushing on a magicless human. How could he fall for someone like you? I mean, sure, you’re amazing, always in his corner, don’t tell him to shut up (might ask him to lower the volume but never in a rude way), and is fine when he trails after them like a lost puppy. He’s realizing maybe this is how his mother felt when she met his father. He’s also in a conflict about how being in a romantic relationship would drag him from his duties of being Malleus’s bodyguard, but Lilia is quick to explain even Knights are permitted to have a love life.
When he decides to finally try to “make you swoon,” as Lilia so kindly refers to it as he’s going to be awkward. It’s almost like a mission he’s just accepted where he has to win you over. He’ll try to hold doors for you but use a bit too much force and make the door slam against the wall as he awkwardly shuffles out of the way to let you pass. He might even try compliments, but they’re going to be the weirdest thing. “Ah, the cowlick on the back of your head is extra springy today!” He is trying.
Sebek’s confession will most likely be accidental. You two are just hanging out, and you ask him why he scared off that group of Savanaclaw students that, in hindsight, were trying to pick a fight with you, but you didn’t notice the hostility due to being used to it at the school. He’ll comment about how “If a knight can't even protect the love of his life, how can he protect his own master?” before realizing what he said. Want to make the poor boy malfunction? Grab his tie and drag him down for a quick kiss and tell him you love him, too, as your lips are still brushing against his own. His brain might stop working for a while. You might need to call Lilia because you broke him.
What he lacks in experience, he makes up for in spirit. He is always honest with you, even if you don’t want him to be. The good news is, most of the time, it’s very good things he’s commenting on. He’ll comment if you look breathtaking one day or how your eyes have a spark that he adores. He’ll also comment that the drool on your cheek when you wake up compliments your drowsy expression, though, so just be prepared for those awkward compliments. The good news is he is loyal to you, so you never have to worry about him hiding something.
PDA is considered inappropriate in his eyes, but he sees no harm in escorting you to your class after he finishes making sure Malleus is safely on his own. Might even have you tag along on his duties protecting Malleus, which you never mind since Malleus is also a good friend of yours, so it’s like a mini group hangout. Once Sebek’s master is gone, though, he’ll shyly offer his arm for you to hold onto and takes you to your class. If you give him a quick peck on the cheek, he won’t bite your head off, but expect to have his staring with wide eyes as you enter the classroom, a hand on the cheek you just kissed, and cherry red in the face.
Overnight cuddles are almost exclusively set in Diasomnia. Sebek needs to be close to Malleus if he needs protection, and he feels like he can’t do that if he’s always staying the night over at Ramshackle dorm. This is fine, though; his bed is more comfortable than your dorm's. The only issue is sometimes when you’re talking late at night, his volume might rise to a shout and disturb other residents. Lilia might gently urge him to visit you at Ramshackle and assure Sebek that he will personally guard Malleus that night, so there’s nothing to fear. Since it’s only Grim in Ramshackle, it’s fine to be a bit noisier as you talk about your day, so that’s a bonus.
He’s now going to be the guard dog of two people, and students are going to realize this very quickly. If Sebek isn’t with Malleus, then he’s going to be right next to you. If someone looks at you wrong or treats you with disrespect, they get an angry crocodile to deal with. Thankfully, he’s easy to reel in when worked up if you just place a hand on his arm and tell him it’s fine and to go somewhere else. He’ll always respect your decision and leave the student with a warning that if he tried that again, he wouldn’t let it go so easily.
Sebek is going to be stiff and awkward with the display of affection. Compliments come easy to him. He just speaks from the heart. Wrapping his arms around you and nuzzling his face into your neck? That’s something he isn’t used to doing and will take some warming up. Be the one to initiate it the first few times in private, and he’ll be better. Might even be the main instigator when it comes to kisses when it’s just you two. They’re always gentle as well; he enjoys cupping your face in one of his hands and drawing you in. You can always feel his smile against your lips as he pulls away from you.
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Silver
Silver is going to slowly realize that he’s falling for you. The first sign that he might like you more than a friend is when he realizes he’s a little more awake around you. He doesn’t find himself growing as tired and getting into one of his sleepy spells. He’s just going to be a little more alert hanging out with you, almost like he doesn’t want to miss a single moment of your time together by falling asleep. His body's unconscious way of informing him that he likes you.
This isn’t to say he’s not going to be napping around you. Whatever condition he has won’t magically disappear once he falls in love; it just isn’t happening as often if you’re in the room. When it does happen, he feels comfortable enough to lean against you and doze off. If you offer your lap for him to sleep in while you’re reading or studying, he’ll be grateful and take you up. He’ll be out like a light but definitely dreaming about you. Run your hands through his hair, and he might even find himself nuzzling into your touch while still asleep, something that is honestly adorable.
Lilia is the first person in Diasomnia who realizes that Silver is in love with you and fully supports his son’s decision. Lilia has seen how you treat Silver, and he couldn’t think of a better partner for his son. This doesn’t mean Lilia won’t be teasing Silver about his crush. He’s even going to be inviting you over to the dorm for some tea and snacks after class as he tries to wingman for his son. Not that Silver needed it, but he doesn’t appreciate having more time with you. However, Silver is going to warn you not to try the snacks if Lilia made them. He doesn’t need you dying on him.
Cuddling is a step that will be happing before you enter a relationship with him. Yes, he’ll be asleep on your lap, but sometimes it’s more than that. If you two are studying in your room, sitting on your bed, and he grows tired, he might wrap his arms around your waist and drag you down for a nap. It’s a much-needed one, in his opinion, with how much you’ve been pouring over your books for the last few hours. Besides, he’s great at cuddling and will drag you against his chest and prop his chin on top of your own as he falls asleep. His soft hair might tickle, but honestly, he has a faint scent of lavender on his skin that lulls you into a deep sleep as well.
His confession is going to initially be an accident. You’re going to be at the dorm, and he’ll be leaning on your shoulder after falling asleep. He’ll murmur your name, and you think for a moment he’s woken up but looking at his face, he’s still passed out. He’ll murmur a small “I love you” in his sleep that is sure to set anyone’s heart pounding. Later on, when he’s awake, if you ask him about it, you’ll notice his cheeks becoming a bit pink as he explains he meant to tell you properly sometime in the next week, but this works as well. It’s a cute and genuine way of confessing.
He’s still a well-trained bodyguard, so expect him to have a protective side for you. When he’s not guarding Malleus, he’ll be more than happy to hang out by your side. He’ll be like your own personal escort to and from classes and even offer to walk you home at the end of the day. You want to go shopping, but it’s getting dark outside? Don’t even think about it unless you’re calling up Silver to see if he’ll be able to go with you. He likes protecting you, which gives him a little pride whenever you ask him to go with you places. He knows you’re probably perfectly safe on campus, but he still enjoys doing it. Maybe put his training to work when you get in a small scrap with students in another dorm.
Silver is a little indifferent when it comes to PDA. He doesn’t like or dislike it; it’s just part of the relationship. Or so he says, but he will melt when you hold his hand walking through the school. Small but lingering kisses are also something he adores, and the small pink tinging his cheeks is enough to let you know he’s not totally indifferent to those things. He might even initiate them himself, but he definitely prefers most things behind closed doors. He doesn’t like it when others can see those flustered expressions you make when he wraps his arms around you and drags you close, cupping your head and pulling you in for a series of small kisses. Those are for his eyes only, and he’s planning on keeping it that way.
Come spend time with him while he’s training. He might not be a showoff, but he won’t be opposed to you seeing his skills with a sword. It’s something to swoon over, and Lilia always is telling him that people like others who have special talents. Not to mention he’s a different person in training; you can’t keep your eyes off him. The way his body moves in instinct alone is impressive. He’ll also see if you want to join him for his club activities and go on rides with him. He’s going to find the most sturdy horse, so it’ll have no issue holding the two of you.
He’ll often find himself going to bed with you. It’s a calm and peaceful time; he really likes it when he can stay awake longer than you and just see how peaceful your face is. He’s been told by others that he has a certain beauty to him when he’s asleep, and he always thought it was odd. Seeing you like this changed his mind. He can see the appeal of how relaxed your body and face are. He also loves early mornings, especially if you wake him up with small kisses along his cheeks and neck, maybe a few on his lips. You being the first thing he sees in the morning while the sunlight is beaming down on you? Best wake up.
You’ll be dragged to his table for lunch at least once or twice a week. He understands you have friends and won’t pull you away from them, but he does enjoy you having lunch with him and his other dorm members. The Diasomnia dorm is his family, both literally and figuratively. He wants you to be close to the people he loves most. He always gets the same thing for lunch since it’s his favorite, but he doesn’t mind if you offer him a bite of whatever you’re having. He still wants his favorite meal, but a bite or two of something different helps expand his palette.
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spacebarbarianweird · 4 months
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Hi, discord friend! this is one of the silly ideas I had 😌 Asterion is having a very bad luck day. He keeps dropping things, setting off traps, breaking lockpicks, he ripped his shirt, and now his seduction skills are lacking hard. How would he navigate it?
As someone who is very clumsy and tends to panic a lot (triggered even by something unimportant), I can totally relate to Astarion is this prompt.
Thanks @brabblesblog for beta reading!
Tainted
Synopsis: Astarion believes he's been healed - but yet another unpleasant interaction and the darkness is back.
Tags: post-game, established relationship, mentions of past trauma.
TW: Conversation about triggers.
Read on AO3
Masterlist
Headcanons
Astarion looks around the street. The town of Daggerfold, barely home to more than a thousand people, is dark and peaceful. Just a stopover for travelers, but once a part of a long-gone kingdom of the past.
He carefully navigates to a tavern where he stays with you. He was hesitant about renting a room first.
"They will notice I am a vampire, darling, and I am afraid. People in those cities tend to hate vampire lovers more than the Undead themselves."
But you looked at him with those puppy eyes (learned from a professional), and he agreed. Besides, not being constricted to the tent for the whole day feels nice.
Astarion can walk around the room and the tavern, read, and talk to the people if he wants (he usually doesn't) and you can sleep in a comfortable bed.
Besides, you both have had a bath for the first time in weeks today.
Astarion notices the signs of the pre-dawn on the east. The innate fear grasps his mind.
Run. Run. Run.
Hide. Or die. Elves call it mor. The ultimate death, without resurrection to come.
Astarion forces himself to calm down. It's still too early and the Inn is already visible in the distance. He doesn't even have to rush.
A hand grabs his wrist and he flinches, disturbed by the unwelcome touch.
The young man, probably a half-elf, tries to pull him closer, seductively licking his lips, a gesture too familiar for Astarion not to notice.
"Looking for company, handsome?" His words are sweet and full of lust. "I can offer you a time of pleasure."
Astarion wants to set himself free, just to go away. It's not supposed to be difficult. It's not like the young man's grip is tight. A simple "no" is enough, people in this profession don’t tend to insist.
The vampire knows it from personal experience.
"Your skin is so pale, almost like marble. And hands... so cold. Come on, I will warm you"
Astarion is paralyzed. As if he is ordered not to move. Like he often used to be.
When he was on the other side of this conversation. When he was the man who needed to get a client as soon as he could.
Seeing no resistance, the prostitute reaches out for his cheek.
His touch is acid-burning.
"GO AWAY!" Astarion yells, almost betraying his fangs. "Leave me alone!"
The man is taken aback and immediately pulls away. Astarion curses and mutters through his teeth all the slurs he remembers.
Every word he ever heard from passers-by.
Whore. Slut.
Filliken.
There is a disgusted and evil smile on the man's face. "You were like me, am I right? All of you… former colleagues, are like that."
Astarion steps back. A dark wave of terror drags him to the abyss. The sun is almost up.
He makes himself move towards the Inn.
"But you can't escape your past! You hear me? It will always be with you, no matter how hard you try to wash it all away!"
Astarion runs. The moment the first ray pierces the air, he is already in the safe shadow of a sleepy inn.
It's almost empty. Only a few drunkards sleep peacefully on the floor. Astarion goes upstairs, praying you aren't back yet.
Because he doesn't want to look at you right now.
His hands tremble and dark thoughts plague his mind like a swarm of flies.
The room is empty and your walking boots are missing. He sighs in relief.
That's the problem with you. You know when something is wrong. Even if you understand he doesn't want to discuss it, you still acknowledge it.
Besides, if you were in the room, you would hear the screams.
Astarion falls on the bed, not bothering to undress himself, and closes his eyes.
He needs to meditate. He needs to wander away. When he wakes up, it will be better.
But Astarion should know better; it never works like that.
Again and again, he sees the same things. Hands of strangers, touching him without his consent. His cheeks, his chest, his back. His private parts. Grabbing and groping him. Laughing and smiling. Future victims. Useful people he needed to extract information from. Others whom he just needs to please.
Sweat that feels like acid. Touches that hurt like red-hot tongs. Intimacy is worse than torture.
Astarion tries to force his mind to remember something else. You, he needs to remember you. Your touches, your voice, your blood. He attempts to visualize you but instead, it's a look-alike stranger, a fake voice with hurtful words.
He sits up, pressing his hands to the chest. His body feels rested but his mind is exhausted. Astarion hears voices from downstairs - busy afternoon in the tavern.
…You sleep beside him pressing your face into the pillow. Astarion notices that his boots are taken off and his body is covered with a blanket. It seems like when you came back, you put the shoes off him and tucked him in the blanket.
Astarion carefully gets out of bed. He still has a few hours before you wake up and he needs to occupy his mind with something.
It seems like the trance has made things worse.
Astarion, moron, you taint Tav. A voice within his undead heart whispers. Your past will never go away. Your skin is dirty. People will always know who you are. Tav pities you but even heroes are tired of being saviors.
This will never be over. Whatever he does. Wherever he goes, his past will follow him like the smell of death. He ruins you. He destroys you.
Astarion takes a book out of the bag and opens it randomly. A trembling hand tries to turn the page.
And tears it.
Fuck.
The books fall to the floor with a loud thump.
You move in your sleep but don't wake up. Astarion, cursing himself for being so clumsy, picks it up and immediately bumps his head on the wooden table.
Tainted. Tainted, the voices keep whispering, completely taking away all the control. His body doesn't belong to him. All the movements are off.
"Astarion, are you all right?" you mumble in the pillow.
"Yes... my... I am ... " The ability to talk properly leaves him as well.
He needs to go out. At least, he can sit in a tavern and look for potential contracts.
In a tavern similar to his hunting spots. And where yet another person might try to get him to bed.
He pulls out the door, but it is locked. He looks around and sees the key on the table. Tries to take it but it slips away through his fingers.
"Is anything wrong?" you yawn, sitting up. Your face is sleepy and the hair is messy.
"No... I am..."
You stand up and while still half-asleep pick up the key and open the door. Astarion stays at the threshold, fearing to fall down the stairs the moment he leaves the room.
"Astarion, the more I live with you, the more you resemble a cat to me! Do you want to stay inside or go out?"
"I ... "
His hands are still trembling. You look at them, noticing the tremor.
And close the door.
"I take my words back about you being a cat. You are more like a hobgoblin now."
"Careful, darling, I can get offended"
"So, you can speak now. What's wrong? You don’t look drunk to me, so?"
"Nothing important. Please, go to sleep."
"Did someone hurt you?"
"No, nothing"
"Liar."
Before he manages to object, you make him return to bed. As he sits down, you help him to undress. The light armor he forgot to put off, the shirt, and the trousers are carefully placed on the chair. He stays only in his underwear.
His hands are still shaking.
“I would gladly offer you my blood, but I am afraid you will pierce my carotid artery in your current state.”
Astarion nods. You lie on the bed and pull him to you. He places his head on your chest. You wrap your hands around him as if protecting him from the outside world and his own mind.
You are warm like sunlight.
You lie silently under the blanket in the dark room. You got the cheapest room in the Inn – the one without windows and the Innkeeper couldn’t understand why you two were so content about it.
“Can I touch your back?” you ask.
"What? Of course... Of course, you can. Why do you even ask?"
"Because I care about you", a gentle caress brushes over his scars. “Because I want you to feel safe.”
And he gives up. He tells you everything. About the man on the streets. The words and curses Astarion addressed mostly to himself.
"I feel tainted," he admits. “I feel that I ruined you. I can't undo my past. It follows me like a shadow. And I bring this shadow to our bed!
A soft kiss. Then, another. Fingers draw invisible pictures on his skin. Tears prickle his eyes.
Why is he so weak? Why is he so pathetic?
Noticing his tension, you tug him closer.
"I am sorry", he mutters. "I thought I had already recovered. That the things have already gotten better."
"They have. And you can't make progress without taking any steps back. It's a part of growth."
He chuckles but still feels miserable. He doesn't know what makes him feel worse. The thoughts in his head or the understanding that he has been lying to himself.
Astarion believed he was healed. It was a lie.
"You don't taint me, Astarion. You don't ruin me. I don't care how many people touched you. I care only about what you are and what you want to be."
He finally finds the strength to pull you closer to himself. "I want it to be over. I want to move forward. But I just can't. It seems like… he truly broke me. There is nothing to repair.”
“A broken man wouldn’t desire revenge the very moment he acquired freedom. Broken people beg to be returned to their masters. A broken man wouldn’t fight back. You aren’t broken and you are healing. And I love you. Never doubt it.”
You lie together in silence. Astarion notices his hands don’t tremble anymore and he relaxes a bit. He is safe. 
But is he happy?
He concentrates on his feelings. He is in the dark room protected from the sun. On the soft and comfy bed. His hands are wrapped around you, the first and only person he cares about and loves. And who gives him everything he thought he wasn’t worthy of? A heavy thick blanket covers you both. The touches on his bare skin are so gentle he is about to cry. The soothing heartbeat sounds like a lullaby.
Yes, he is happy. Even if his mind tries to tell him otherwise.
You fall asleep again, and Astarion stays motionless not wanting to wake you up yet again.
When he finally notices your movements, indication that you are ready to wake up. He frees himself from your grip and presses his lips against yours. He kisses you softly, slowly, tasting you.
Thanking you.
“Feeling better?” you ask once your eyes open.
"Hello, darling", he smiles. “Yes, I am.”
Mor - ultimate death. Filliken - “open skirt”, a prostitute (a slur).
--
Tag list
@tugoslovenka @marcynomercy @wintersire @vixstarria @not-so-lost-after-all @ashiro20 @theearthsfinalconfession @herstxrgirl @starlight-ipomoea @micropoe10 @astarion-imagine-archive @veillsar @elora-the-slutty-songstress @fayeriess @lumienyx @astarion-beloved @tallymonster @caitlincat-95 @tragedybunny @valeprati
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nolita-fairytale · 4 months
Text
new year's eve & day with chef luca
a/n: just a little headcanon that came to me on my hot girl walk, lightly inspired by marc vetri's episode of chef's night out & t. swift's 'new year's day.' wherever you are in the world right now, happy new year, loves!
i wrote this with the world of burn your life down in mind, writing in original characters from it. however, if you haven't read the series, you should still be able to read this headcanon!
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new year's eve & day with boyfriend! luca:
astrid and lina (your former sisters-in-law) come to visit copenhagen after christmas and right before new year's, and you're determined to show them a great time.
jesper has made plans for the evening, picking out which club you'll convene at to ring in the new year. what is supposed to be a few cocktails at a trendy new speakeasy bar hidden inside of a hotel lobby quickly turns into dancing at a trendy club a few blocks down.
it's you, luca, mathilde, emil (mathilde's husband who, i've always pictured as rege-jean page) jesper, astrid, and lina. astrid is making friends right and left and you and lina are thick as thieves, so happy she came out to visit. ("i suppose he's beginning to grow on me," lina admits with a sigh and a playful eye roll, in reference to luca).
"where to next?" lina asks. "oh my god, i'm starving!" astrid adds, before trying her best to rally everyone to grab a first bite of the new year. it's a no brainer to invite everyone back to you and luca's place for food, riding high on good company and fancy champagne.
you make a simple yet delicious and easy pesto spaghetti as luca stays by your side, whispering in your ear while he thinks no one is paying attention: "you know i love our people... but i can't wait to get you alone, my love."
while you plate up bowls of pasta, luca pours everyone a night cap, and you all spread out around the living room to eat. it feels good to be in the best company -- some from your life pre-copenhagen (and pre-luca), and the others, the most important people in this new chapter of your life that you've come to love so deeply.
everyone stumbles home or back to their hotel between 2 and 4 am, and by the time everyone is gone, you and luca are exhausted. you both agree that while you weren't expecting to have as long of a night as you did, you're glad you hosted and cooked for your people.
the next morning, luca makes good on his promise from the night before, his mind set on starting the new year with bang. "well, we gotta start the new year off right, darling? don't you think?" he asks you as he presses you into the mattress, his hands sliding underneath the t-shirt you put on before bed. "well, we did miss the fireworks last night," you justify with a giggle as you chase his mouth with yours. "guess we'll have to make some of our own."
by the time you're out of the bed (and out of the shower), astrid and lina are ready to reconvene. you and luca meet them at one of your favorite bakeries for brunch (and a little hair of the dog). you go around the table sharing favorite memories from the year before and resolutions for the new year.
post-brunch, you and luca take the most leisurely stroll home and then a long nap.
at some point, you begin to clean up from last night's impromptu pasta party, hand washing your stainless steel pans and wondering how the hell all of this glitter got into your apartment.
"anything you wish for the new year, my love?" you ask luca as he goes through a drawer in need of a decluttering.
"well, we are opening a restaurant together," he replies, cheekily. "so i suppose that."
"i suppose," you return, before leaving a soft kiss against his lips. you move on to your next house project, reflecting on just how beautifully both you and luca have woven your lives together over the past year.
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Could I request Dadvi after the war, (wishful thinking, he just needed to heal and learn how to walk again after I healed) he has children outside of paradise? He fall in love with someone in the medical field. Please and thank you
think my heart would melt if i ever saw levi playing with his toddler ksjdfksdjf
Needy Little Brat | 2K Follower Event | Post-War Dadvi Drabble
✧ word count ➼ ~800 ✧ notes ➼ post-war, fluff, my headcanon that levi can still walk but with a limp and uses the wheelchair as a mobility aid
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You stepped out of the shower, pulling your shirt on over your head, immediately frowning once you heard your husband cursing across the hallway in the living room.
You walked over to see what it was that got Levi grumpy, knowing that it could range from something as simple as his tea leaves being steeped for too long all the way up to something catastrophic like the house getting set on fire.
You sighed as you saw him walking across the room from the dining table over towards the couch. His limp was a bit more noticeable than usual and you could see the small frown line on his forehead that resulted from him trying to ignore the pain that was undoubtedly shooting through his leg.
You remembered how stubborn Levi was when the war first ended. He had accepted the idea that his knee would never fully heal, but struggled with gauging where his limit was in terms of pain tolerance. Luckily, he had you to call him out on his bullshit, noting that if he kept pushing himself, then he was going to end up hurting himself more and end up being even more pissed than he already was. Plus, the fact that you were a combat medic helped with navigating his recovery.
Still, he was stubborn and refused to stay seated even though he was clearly in pain.
"You know, if you need to sit down or use the wheelchair, then quit being stubborn and just use it," you insisted with a sigh, unfolding his wheelchair and wheeling it over.
"Kinda hard to sit still when there's this little shit running around," he grumbled.
You followed his gaze and then understood why he was forcing himself to walk around despite his knee likely flaring up.
While your child had been calmly playing near the couch when you had stepped into the shower, she was now unsteadily wandering around the living room, with no regard for any tripping hazards or the coffee table that she was now tall enough to bump into.
She finally noticed Levi glaring at her, with her face lighting up as she began to run towards the two of you, immediately tripping over her own two feet.
Before you even got a chance to react, Levi had already leapt forward to catch her so that she didn't faceplant into the ground.
While you could clearly tell that he was in pain from the sudden movement, your daughter clearly did not put the pieces together, beginning to babble as she grabbed at Levi's arms.
Sighing again, you bent over and picked her up from the ground, motioning your head towards the wheelchair to indicate to Levi that you had brought it out for him if he needed it.
Now that he no longer had to worry about your child accidentally hurting herself for running around before she could properly keep her balance, he got into the mobility aid, clearly exasperated by the fact that your child was just as stubborn as he was when it came to moving around when she wasn't supposed to.
Still, he couldn't blame her. She was a kid exploring the world, but he'd be damned if he didn't admit to himself that he felt wholly unprepared when it came to having an actual child that wasn't just the 104th goofing off or hanging out around Gabi or Falco that were already able to take care of themselves.
His eyes flashed up towards you, his gaze falling on the toddler in your arms that was now looking more distressed as she reached out for him, trying to wriggle out of your arms.
"Alright, alright, calm down," you scolded, securing your grip on her so that she didn't fall headfirst back down to the ground.
"She's just as clingy as you are," he muttered, the corner of his lip raising into a small smirk as he saw the somewhat bashful look on your face as your cheeks began to heat up.
"Well, she's just as stubborn as you are," you retorted as you plopped her into his lap after he got settled.
She immediately calmed down, giggling as Levi began to poke at her belly after calling her a "needy little brat", which she found absolutely hilarious despite not knowing what he was actually saying.
You watched as she began trying to grab at Levi's hand, which he was drawing back at the last second, before going back in and allowing her to grab at him again, before drawing his hand back again, unable to hide the amused expression steadily forming on his face. Eventually, he gave in, allowing her to firmly grab at his thumb.
"Quick reflexes, this one," he pointed out, giving a nod of approval, which made you snort in disbelief.
"Wonder where she gets that from."
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halfagone · 7 months
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Is Good Parents Maddie and Jack Fenton even possible?
Specifically, would they be able to change their mindset after over twenty years of bigotry and scientific curiosity?
If they saw their human son turn into Phantom, would they still think of him as their kid? Would they love him, accept him and support him?
I, personally, can't see the canon reveals as anything but a kid friendly compromise of giving the viewers the satisfaction of a reveal and keeping the status quo of the light-hearted show going.
But with everything the Fenton parents did, said, and invented... is it possible for them to turn their backs on their research and start from scratch? To admit that they were wrong after decades of being called quacks, crazy and idiots?
The only thing they were right about was the existence of ghosts, but now they endangered the whole world by building their portal that half-killed their son and traumatised millions of people.
So. Is it possible to write a Good Parents Jack and Maddie fic that doesn't shy away from all the awful things they did and how would you go about it?
Thank you for your time!
The short answer: Technically? Yes. Realistically? Probably not.
The long answer: Everyone is capable of change but not everyone will. For all intents and purposes, they are capable of growing as people and learning to recognize their mistakes and biases and leaving those behind... It just likely wouldn't be a simple flick of a switch. At the same time there is reason to believe that the Fentons wouldn't change their minds.
You said it yourself, over twenty years they've acted like this and so logically you would begin to assume that's just how they've always been and always will be. That shows this goes far beyond their parenting style and skills, and has everything to do with who they are as people.
(Buckle up, this one's a long post.)
We don't actually know all that much about the Fenton parents in canon. We don't see any grandparents or relatives other than Aunt Alicia. Although we have headcanons as a fandom that Jack and Maddie have ghost-related trauma, or it's a family tradition from the Fenton side with Jack Fentonightingale, to explain why they've always been like this, that is still no canon confirmation. (Fentonightingale was a witch hunter, not a ghost hunter after all.)
As far as we are aware, for one reason or another, one day Jack and Maddie started to believe ghosts were real and not just real but malicious. I may not be a scientist by career but even I can tell you they've failed in their duties as scientists the moment they chose their hypotheses over the evidence. That is literally something they teach you in high school science class; you ask a question and then research for evidence supporting that question. (Otherwise known as the "if... then" statement.)
Sometimes that means your first assumption was incorrect, but the evidence cannot be changed. So to me, the Fenton parents aren't ghost scientists, they're ghost hunters and those implications have connotations all of their own. And those connotations reflect poorly on them. And this isn't even to mention their general lack of workplace safety.
When we look at their friendships- they have no friends. They had Vlad in college, but they fucked up that relationship and don't even seem too broken up about it. They hadn't spoken to each other in twenty years until the reunion, and they obviously knew he'd made something of himself; Jazz recognized his name from Billionaire of the Year I think the magazine was supposed to be or something.
When Jack explains what happened to Vlad in "Bitter Reunions", he literally mentions how he thinks Vlad has forgiven him now. So obviously he acknowledges that what happened between them was due an apology.
Do you know something that's noticeably absent? A single apology from either Jack or Maddie. Yes, Jack might be more at fault in his accident, but Maddie ignored him for twenty years too. Vlad can talk whatever crap he'd like about Jack, but Maddie is just as culpable in his 'abandonment' as her husband is. We have proof from "Masters of All Time" that Maddie isn't afraid to go behind her husband's back and do what she wants. If she truly cared about him, she would have made an effort and she never did.
But of course, now we have to talk about them as parents. That's where things get... a lot more complicated.
In "Maternal Instincts" at one point Maddie is shown carrying Danny piggy-back style. It's never explained, it's not played off as a joke. Danny isn't injured and neither is he faking an injury. It's literally just something Maddie did, probably with the idea that she's taking care of and protecting him. And Danny isn't embarrassed by it at all, even when he's been shown to be ashamed of some of his parents' other antics.
In "Girls Night Out", Jack takes Danny fishing as a father-son bonding activity. And I mean that literally, he got the idea from a book called 'Father/Son Relationships For Stupids!'. That might imply that he's a bad parent but that also goes to prove that he's aware of his shortcomings as a father and is genuinely trying to do more for his son. Not everyone comes to parenthood naturally, so for Jack to actively search for advice- even if it comes from a book- says that he wants to do this parent thing.
But in my opinion, the episode that best reveals how the Fentons function as a family is "The Fenton Menace" (and no, that's not just because my blog description references it lol). In that episode, we see Jazz's failings as a supportive sister almost from the very start; in her opening narration, she talks about how she knows his secret and yet when he insists through and through that he sees a ghost, she still thinks she knows better/otherwise. We also get a touching moment where Maddie talks about spending quality time with the people you love (which is a line almost word for word from the show, by the way).
However, there are two things that stand out the most from this episode. This is the episode where we get the line: "Whether it's air, land, or sea I won't stop until we capture a ghost and tear it apart. Molecule by molecule." In response to this, Danny gets visibly upset. It is probably one of the most damning pieces of evidence in the entire series that his parents' behavior genuinely bothered him. He makes jokes about them shooting or experimenting on him, but humor can and often is used as a coping mechanism. After that quote? Danny didn't try to hide his reaction until later on when Jazz asked him. And even then he dismisses it with a quip.
The second thing from this episode also so happens to feed into my main point for this entire argument: This is the episode where Jack and Maddie attempt to 'spin the crazy' out of Danny. That kind of behavior is something you'd find in places like Arkham Asylum, which is notorious for their inhumane treatment of its patients. Decidedly not something you expect to see from supposedly loving parents. That absolutely constitutes as cruel and unusual punishment and yet it's not even meant to be a punishment.
They sincerely think that they're trying to help him by doing this. And that's the heart of the issue, in my opinion. Jack and Maddie don't think about other people. They don't think about their feelings or their safety or their privacy. They are so caught up in the idea that they are doing good that they never stop to think that they're part of the problem. Or the entire problem altogether.
The only time that we get some decent self-reflection is during Reality Trip, when Danny's identity is revealed by Freakshow and the Fenton parents and Jazz are taken as hostages. While they're stuck and trapped, they question why Danny had never told them his identity before, which is when Jazz comments about the poor way they used to treat his ghostly side. It's only then that it clicks for them that oh yeah we did that. That's what it took for them to recognize that their actions have consequences and even with good intentions, you are capable of hurting the people you love.
And I think that's one of the best ways to go about it. You need to give them the time and opportunity for that self-reflection and reclamation. Jack and Maddie are- naturally- a shoot first and ask later (if ever) type of people. One way or another, there needs to be a way for them to pull back and sit and look around for once.
There are many ways to address this too and make way for the possibility of Good Parents Jack and Maddie. One of the fics that immediately comes to mind for me is @akela-nakamura's Not Everything Is As It Seems. In this one we focus on Jack's perspective, and this fic made me So Unwell with its quiet gravitas, I can never recommend it enough. But if you want something from Maddie's perspective, then you can read @peachdoxie's incredible Trust Your Instincts fic. It is 36 chapters, already completed, and it's this beautiful journey through Maddie's Outsider POV.
As for me personally, I explored the subject in Chapter 51 of my fic lex luthor's ascent from supervillainy to fatherhood, Interlude III: Dynasty. We actually get two different reactions from the Fenton parents, one that is more from a 'Good Parent' and one from a 'Bad Parent'.
I think the most important part is to never shy away from talking about and exploring all the horrible things they did and have done. It's difficult to discuss, but the subject is complicated and to address it as anything less than complicated wouldn't be fair to those moments where the Fentons genuinely did want to be there for their children.
Does it make any of their behavior right? No. Does it prove that they can change? Yes. Will they? ...That will have to be left up to each individual writer.
If you found yourself in a similar family situation, of course you're gonna want your family or your parents to grow or choose you. Because you love them, and you want to keep them in your life. But at some point you have to think about yourself and your own safety and health. That doesn't mean you give up on them, but you protect yourself from the fallout in case they don't change.
Every person is capable of it, but not every person is willing to. The Fenton parents are no different in that regard.
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raph-x-reader-logs · 1 month
Text
Masterlist
I would like to preface this with a disclaimer that I do not own TMNT and I am not a writer! This is a collection of all the Raphael writings I can find, so it would be easier to binge-read for my favorite turtle. Last Updated: 17 April 2024
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Directions:
This is fairly simple and straightforward, but I'll add some directions just in case!
The master list is split into different iterations, genres, points of view, and then reader types. If the section gets too long (which I'm expecting they will) a new page will be created and linked on this post.
Each link will take you exactly where you want to go within this blog! This exempts the posts with a cut in them, those links will take you directly to the blog where the story is posted.
As for AO3 links, if the story has multiple chapters, it will take you to the "Entire Work" version so you can binge the whole fic.
Rules:
I am open to any suggestions or submissions! HOWEVER, within this Masterlist, you will not find the following:
OC x Raph
Canon x Raph
TCEST x Raph
Now that all of that stuff is out of the way; Enjoy!! :D -Pinto🌱
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Fluff
NSFW
Angst
Just Friends by @theyhavetakenovermylife , 2POV, fem! reader, NSFW too, Summary: Raph has trouble juggling his mission and his feelings for you.
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Fluff
NSFW
Angst
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Fluff
Focus by @pebblestar , 2POV, gn!reader, Summary: Raph helps you focus, whether he likes it or not.
NSFW
When The Tables are Turned by @theturtlelovers , 2POV, gn!reader, Summary: Raph really likes it when you take charge..
Angst
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Fluff
NSFW
Shower Sex by @theyhavetakenovermylife , 2POV, fem!reader, Summary: Things get a bit steamy with Raph.
SnapCall by @oozedninjas , 2POV, f!reader, Summary: You send him nudes while he is on patrol and he isn't quite happy about it.
Angst
Acceptance by RubyRaspberry , AO3, 2POV, Hurt and Comfort, fem!reader, Summary: An injured Raph lands on your fire escape! Turns out you’re an extremely understanding person! But how much are you willing to accept?
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Fluff
NSFW
Rough and Tumble by @mytheoristavenue , 2POV, fem!reader, Summary: After dating Raph for almost a year, he begins to ache for you...
Angst
A Reasonable Turtle by @thejudiciousneurotic , 2POV, gn!reader, Yandere, Summary: Raphael wasn't an unreasonable turtle—at least that's what he told himself with each hit of his fists, relentlessly beating the man who dared to try to take you from him.
Fire Breather by @tmntxthings , 2POV, fem!reader, Summary: Reader is fed up with Raphael's attitude.
There, I Said It by @tmntxthings , 2POV, gn!reader, Summary: It's that awful feeling when you can feel them slowly start to slip away.
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Here
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Fluff
Cuddle Headcanons by @mysticovo , 2POV, fem!reader
He's Too Nervous to Ask You Out by @scaredycatqlt , 2POV, masc!reader, hc format
You Don't Scare Me by @tmntfixationxreader , 2POV, fem!reader, Summary: Raph misunderstands your shyness toward him as fear.
Self Conscious Sleepover by @tmntfixationxreader , 2POV, gn!reader, Summary: Raph doesn't want you to see his retainer during your sleepover together.
Make You Feel Loved by @tmntxthings , 2POV, gn!reader, Summary: Raph takes a love potion!
Wherever You Go by @tmntxthings , 2POV, gn!reader, Summary: Raphael is head over heels in love with you and he would do absolutely anything for you, just as you would for him.
NSFW
Gentle by @fishstixloser , 2POV, gn!reader , Summary: You spend some quality time with Raph while he's brumating.
Angst
Change by @tmntxthings , 2POV, Hurt no Comfort, gn!reader, Summary: You make him happy and he's willing to do anything to make you see that he loves you. He wishes you can see that.
Big Teddy Bears Are The Best by @theyhavetakenovermylife , 2POV, fem!reader, Summary: Raph knows he's a big guy, he can't change that. But sometimes he wishes he could.
Your Protector by @tmntxthings , 2POV, gn!reader, Summary: It was supposed to be a normal night -- a normal date. But someone got to you before he could.
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Fluff
Miss Me? by @theyhavetakenovermylife , 2POV , fem!reader , Summary: Raphael is away in Gotham and you miss him.
NSFW
The Night Before by @theyhavetakenovermylife , 2POV , fem!reader, Summary: The events of the night before Raphael leaves for Gotham.
Angst
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Fluff
Hallway Crush by @theyhavetakenovermylife , 2POV, f!reader, Summary: Raph had a crush on the prettiest girl in school, but he's too nervous to talk to her. He took down SuperFly! He saved New York! He can do this!!
Angst
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Fluff
NSFW
How The Movie Night Went by @theyhavetakenovermylife , 2POV , fem!reader, Summary: Things get a little steamy during movie night with Raphie.
Angst
This absolutely is NOT all of them. I'm steadily working through the tag again, so I'll be updating this frequently (as frequently as my life will permit lol).
Again! If you have a fic in mind and you don't see it here, please submit it! I'd love to add it to this list!
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