#this is honestly a really silly thing for me personally to get scandalized by (for a variety of reasons that I won't share)

[chiropteracupola]

dress up nice (and don't get any blood on yourself this time, please)

[collaboration with @dxppercxdxver again. we are still going.]

#em draws stuff #flintlock fortress #team fortress 2 #FINALLY this is done it took me more than five hundred thousand years [editor's note: it took them approximately four days] #this one does show a little that I went to tumblr university instead of art school when it comes to certain design elements. So What. #also I am pretty sure that I used up my Realistic Hands quota for the rest of my life somewhere partway through this drawing #forgive me the couple of fucked-up ones because I also drew four really really super nice hands for a different thing. also a jawbone. #maybe I will also post the jawbone since it does look very good #.....anyway. 'twas about time for a Significant Outfitting Moment in these parts. #proves something about my own sensibilities because I do feel a little bit scandalous for having drawn this. #this is honestly a really silly thing for me personally to get scandalized by (for a variety of reasons that I won't share) #I think it would read better if I reordered the panels but ah I simply do not feel like it. take it as it is. #finishing march strong by not doing so so so many tasks and doing this again. if you need me I'll be in the soup for the next while.

[cenorii]

Hello, I just read your theories about Wesker and Chris in RE9, very interesting! I'd love to see more interactions between them and exploring how obsessed they are with eachother.

I wanted to ask if you have any wishes regarding the probably soon coming RE5 Remake? I'd love if they put more homoerotic tension between them, I am just fascinated by their relationship XD from subordinate who trusted his captain and looked up to him and captain who called him his best man and saying that he's proud of him to archnemesis

Hello, thank you for the question and for taking the time for my theories!

I expect the re5 remake to have reimagined locations, normal lvl design. I like the levels in re5, but often they are not very convenient or aesthetic, I'm sure that in the remake it will be fixed and make a good map of the area, as they did in re4r, where they fixed all the shortcomings of the locations. And...

From my personal wishes for the remake of re5 I would emphasize Wesker's emotions. The thing is that in re5 he has a very large set of various funny emotions, which are very cool. But in re4r he doesn't look like an emotional person, his face doesn't look like something that can compete with the original. I'd really like to see Wesker's new face adapted to emote. I don't like the idea of a complete reimagining of the character where he loses all the silly and fun things that make him himself.

I'd also like to see the volcano battle completely changed, or removed altogether. I never liked it, even though that battle is a lot of fun. But the undressed Wesker is too much, that scene made me question more than laugh. For example, why did he take his clothes off? Did he do it during the fall? It's a silly moment.

I also wish they had conveyed the atmosphere of the grueling African heat, showed that the enemy is not the only thing that threatens the lives of the heroes. I also miss the puzzles in this part, maybe adding more puzzles would be cool. After all the remakes, the developers have gained enough experience to make a decent reimagining of this game. Taking all the good things that were in re5 and multiplying it, as well as getting rid of the controversial moments and faulty decisions.

I know the game has issues with racism, there have been a lot of scandals with that. I'm sure they'll get rid of that too by fixing the controversial stuff. For example, in re4r they took away Luis' lewd joke, deepening his character and making his personality much more interesting.

I appreciate the modes in re5, Mercenaries is my love. I would love to see the updated characters in this mode. Speaking of which, I'd like to see the ability to fight in close quarters added to the game like in re6, getting rid of the annoying qte. That way we'd get Chris, who does a lot of damage up close, and Wesker, who is able to quickly shorten his distance and move around the entire location in a few seconds. Oh yeah, I already want to play as them.

About the relationship… I really wish they paid attention to the relationship between Chrisker, because they have a whole 10 years of history, betrayals and thwarted plans behind them. In re5 their relationship doesn't get the attention it deserves, so I hope for a remake. We as players have to believe in Wesker's hatred if it's present. Or is it now a deep interest in Chris as the perfect person? Lots of options. I'm not sure if the developers will make their relationship more homoerotic, since RE has almost no focus on romantic relationships…

Thanks for reading all the way to the end! Honestly, no matter how the re5 remake comes out, I'll love it any way I can, as it's my all time favorite RE game. We'll definitely get something high level, as Capcom will never make the mistake of re3r again.

#resident evil #resident evil 5 #chrisker #chris redfield #albert wesker #re5 #re5r

[wp-blaze]

The art of obsession and why every detail matters

Life as a perfectionist is challenging and can factually foster inadequacy. Focusing on attention to detail, however, is beneficial for success and culminates in high-quality outcomes.

[cascadiums]

I promise you the eroticism in Dracula adaptations is not always a bad thing. some creators are bad at using it effectively and some I'm sure are just creeps, but it isn't automatically gratuitous or fetishising. there is grounds for it in the novel and a sexless adaptation avoids some really interesting elements.

the way vampires feed is intimate, which is part of what makes it so frightening; when Jonathan encounters the Brides, the fact that he's attracted to them is distressing (the fact that they're women being sexually assertive at all would be disturbing in a Victorian setting). there is also an association between blood and sex in Victorian culture that heightens the whole thing. the predator is sexy and that is bad news for the prey. the Count's transition from ancient hairy-handed bastard to rejuvenated enthralling bastard correlates with his growing power. and, avoiding spoilers, he isn't the only character to become more dangerous as their sexuality is hightened.

for Stoker, the explicitly erotic tends to signpost evil. it's corruption and temptation and everything else you would expect of a monster that is combatted with Christian iconography. if you watch a version of Dracula and find yourself thinking "this is a really fucked up power dynamic to eroticise" then that tracks pretty well with the novel.

but adaptations are responses to a text, right? they're a dialogue between two distinct moments through the way a narrative is re-told. the adaptation comments on its own context and on that of the source material.

so what does that mean in a version of Dracula where the relationship between the vampire and victim is sexualised and even romanticised? it could be that it's removing a perceived layer of victorian restraint and shame from desire, or trying to translate how risque the novel was for a contemporary audience when the goalposts for scandal have been moved. it could be that, in that moment, it was an effective way to give Lucy more agency and control, giving her character the freedom to want. it could be an attempt to reframe the story in a more sex-positive context where attraction = evil doesn't make as much sense. or maybe it's just a schlocky monster movie that favours anything shocking.

like I say, it's not always done effectively, and I understand the aversion. Dracula covers a hell of a lot of themes, and it's a shame that only sexuality ever seems to pull focus in re-tellings, but the Dracula-Makes-Everyone-Swoon versions are still a worthwhile part of the conversation. personally, I don't like the Coppola version for the way it handles the theme, and I never managed to get through the 2020 BBC version because "did you have sexual intercourse with Count Dracula" sent me into hysterics. the Hammer Dracula series, however, is deeply silly, campy and full of sex, and I honestly love it.

#dracula daily #adaptations #an alternate theory is that a bunch of women saw Bela Lugosi in the 1920s play prior to the universal film and thought 'oh damn' #and things proliferated from there

[1moremilgram-enjoyer]

Hey, this is a post that got buried in our account at some point, but I'm very curious about what you think about the German aspects of Shidou's medical history!

(Sorry for being the third Shidou person lol)

-Venus

Wow you're all gonna drag me kicking and screaming into liking Shidou huh? He's already going up in the rankings lol.

Anyways, I'm gonna be honest, as cool a find as it is, I have zero idea what the deal with the German is. Shidou very clearly worked in a Japanese hospital, as seen in Throw Down.

Notice the green signs in the background are written in... well I assume it's Japanese it's gonna be real awkward if that's some other language lol. They’re not the only ones btw, they’re just the clearest.

So it's unlikely he was doing his work in Germany unless he moved his wife's body there after her accident or something, but as much as Shidou's sotryline plays fast and loose with the science of it all, I highly doubt that would work in the slightest.

Now, after some research, turns out Japanese medicine does take some words from German, though it’s most commonly used by older generations and for obstetric (related to pregnancy I think) and gynecologic practice, which isn’t quite what we’re dealing with here. We’re listing completely unrelated organs.

German used to be frequently employed in Japanese obstetric and gynecologic (OBGYN) practice; however, it is now less frequently used. Source.

There are a few other words of German origin, which you can find listed here (CW for a few potentially uncomfortable words, especially related to WWII and medicine). You’ll see there’s quite a few medical terms there, but none of them match what’s on the tag. At least it explains why Shidou knows German in the first place, which is honestly a really cool detail!

I also thought about maybe his wife being German, but I don't think that works either. As stated in an interrogation question (T2 Q17), Shidou and his wife began dating in middle school, and they were family friends (T2 Q16) so it's likely their parents knew each other before they were born, and thus were likely in the same country. The only option I see is both of them being born in Germany, then moving to Japan, but they can't have spent much time there otherwise Shidou should have a higher level than "conversation level" German (T2 Q4). Are their parents German then? What- Why would we need to know this?

Other than that, yeah I’m struggling a bit on this one. Was he writing in German to hide what he was doing from the doctors who didn’t speak German? That’s too silly though. I think the best answer is what was brought up in the rb you linked, that it’s just meant to lead us into thinking of that scandal in Germany so as to get a better idea of what Shidou was doing. That or just Shidou flexing that Japanese-German medicine connection.

Apart from that, regarding some of the other things from the thread you linked. I think the tags being triage tags could certainly work! Especially the things from, well, Triage, since they seem to have a slightly different design, though that could be me going insane. It certainly makes more sense with the “cards of promise” thing, since triage tags carry a more concrete promise than… morgue tags? (don’t know what they’re called).

And the 007 in the back of the tags, I’m not sure if it actually has any medical meaning, but it could have a symbolic meaning.

The number seven has also ingrained itself into both the celebration of life and the mourning of death in Japan. After a baby is born its birth is celebrated on its seventh day of life, conversely after someone's death there is seven days of mourning, then they are mourned once again seven weeks after the death. Source.

So it could represent mourning for the people Shidou has killed, while also representing the hope for his wife’s rebirth. Something like that, maybe.

Or maybe prisoner 007 Kazui was the one who caused the accident /j

Anyways, hope that was good enough! Thanks for the ask, take care!

#milgram #milgram project #milgram theory #shidou kirisaki

[tafadhali]

Yuletide recs, part 1

Cross-posting this from DW. I have >50 works bookmarked on Pinboard so far, but here are 24 favorites.

Asteroid City I hadn't thought to seek out fic for this movie, but I thought both of these captured the Wes Anderson style brilliantly and developed characters and a relationship we only see a glimpse of in the film in interesting (and very different) ways: 

Things That Won't Be Here Tomorrow (Conrad/Jones, 6k)

windows broken and dreaming (Conrad/Jones, 4k)

Bottoms So Bomb (PJ/Hazel, PJ & Josie, 1k) — "Josie helps PJ be a better girlfriend to Hazel"; hysterical

Casablanca The Sentimentalists (Rick/Ilsa, Ilsa/Victor, Rick/Ilsa/Victor, 9k) — post-canon, Rick runs into Ilsa and Victor in Lisbon

Dimension 20

In our midnight world (Leiland/Markus, 5k) — really captures the silliness of Escape from the Bloodkeep and I love all the appearances by the other characters

it doesn't hurt; there's nothing to it(Hob/Rue, 4k)— love them and love them trying to ~*~communicate~*~; hot and sweet first time

Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves Perception Check (Roll for Romance) (Xenk/Edgin, 6k) —

"I bet Xenk fucks like a metronome, too. You know." Holga makes a highly suggestive, repetitive gesture. "In, out. In, out. No variation. Same exact rhythm every time. Boring." Edgin stares at her, torn between horror and fascination. "You've really thought about this, huh?" (So has he. Unfortunately.)

Frederica - Georgette Heyer A Series of Notable Events (Frederica/Alverstoke, 13k) — "What it says on the tin: a series of notable events in the lives of Frederica and Alverstoke, post-canon."

Goblin Emperor A Private Room (gen, 5k) — Maia learns of a scandal brewing from Csethiro, but she is quite able to manage things

An Unexpected Letter (gen, 1k) — Thara gets a letter from the Emperor after Grief of Stones and I have several feelings

The Good Place The Real Actual Human Life of Michael Realman (gen, 1k) — what it says in the title! cute and fun

Hercule Poirot

The Case of the Distracted Detective (Hastings/Poirot, 2k) — I can honestly say I've never read this particular misunderstanding before, and itw as charming and funny!

The Eye of a Needle (gen, 4k) — a neat little casefic with a daemon AU twist

High School Musical Stick to the Status Quo (Reprise) (Chad/Ryan, 17k) — I was totally charmed by this "didn't know they were dating" classic

Jeeves & Wooster Supporting Partner's Suit (Jeeves/Wooster, Honoria/OFC, 6k) — "Never let it be said that Bertie Wooster will abandon a pal in need, even if that pal is a woman who is temporarily in possession of his body and he doesn’t fully understand what’s going on"

Kiss Kiss Bang Bang Fool Proof (Harry/Perry/Harmony, 7k) — this is extremely hot and very funny; captures the tone of the movie perfectly

The Matrix if you'll believe in me (gen, 7k) — "Trinity thinks about anger. Bugs thinks about choices. Both of them think about the future." Interesting fic that picks up mid-Resurrections

Nine Worlds a key that winds through secret wards (gen, 11k) — Kip in the aftermath of the Emerald Conspiracy; a really interesting look into an unexplored part of canon

Ocean's 11 pulse and swing (baby do your thing) (Danny/Rusty, 3k) — fixit for O8 involves Danny doing thief PT and re-figuring out his and Rusty's relationship

somebody else's wallet (Danny/Rusty, 1k) — nicely structured ficlet about Danny and Rusty becoming DannyandRusty

Oz the skin you're in (Dorothy/Ozma, 6k) — "'If we learn magic, you could maybe change your body to be like your old one. You weren’t ever given the choice to keep that boy’s body, were you?' asked Dorothy.

Keep it? The idea jolted Ozma a little bit. Why, how does a person keep another body? You only had the one, right?"

Singin' in the Rain Working Honeymoon (Don/Cosmo/Kathy, 4k) — somehow Cosmo finds himself coming along for the ride on Don and Kathy's honeymoon

Sports Night First Chill of Fall (Dan/Casey, 3k) — all I ever want for Yuletide is more Dan/Casey... this one is set post-s2 and features a slightly oblivious Dan

The Sting the last train to wherever you need to be (Henry/Johnny, 3k) — against their better interests, Johnny and Henry keep running into each other post-movie

#recs #fic recs #yuletide #yuletide 2023

[wegonbealright-09]

this daeun discoloration is so silly to me cause let me tell you one thing if jimin is dating someone then that person is gonna be a whole lot responsible and sensible and who knows how to act. The pjms who says that he's dating her and she's dropping hints believe me if that's what her personality is then i can bet my all money on this and say that he's not dating her, he's not gonna date someone so immature. If he's dating someone that person will try to keep their relationship private exactly the way jimin keeps his shit private. And no he's partner ain't gonna be someone so immature and probably desparate to get attention.the only time you'll find who jm is dating is either through him or if someone envades their privacy and you'll never see his partner dropping hints.

And if he's dating her then saying she's dropping hints is bs cause she's dating him and real life (if that is) and she don't need to need to give hints to anyone. Saying she's giving hints is also immature to me like man they're literally celebraties do you really think they need to do that?

For taennie's case Jennie posted those pictures with same clothes is not because she wanted to give hints to anyone but because she don't give a fk about what others say. She's dating that man irl so what anyone has to say about her is not her problem. She's a worldwide famous celebrity she don't need to give any hints to anyone.

With daeun idk what she does butbi have seen someone saying that she was involved in one of the problematic things (i don't remember what it's called but if i remember I'll tell you again). Some says she's know to be having affairs with celebraties or hyping up such things. Idk how true that is but unless i see a picture of her and jm together actually being couples I'm not beliveing anyone's doormat and shit. I honestly wonder how old these ppl are who believe such things like how old are you? like don't you feel childish while making all the assumptions in the world? And for what exactly? What is him dating gonna do to you? Nothing literally.

I personally don't see Jimin dating that girl, a D list celebrity. And yea she is known for creating and entertaining dating rumours with celebrities and yes she was involved with something problematic and quite scandalous in the past and apparently she likes bad boys and criminals of some sort so for me personally I don't think they're dating, the rumour is just baseless just because I entertain the rumour doesn't mean I believe it.

And this might be only me and I've said it in the past but if it's only me who don't see Jimin dating and actually marrying a woman I need some serious self evaluation and maybe fix my relationship with God or something.

#jimin #park jimin

[daintyduck99]

Love you prompts: "This is my favorite picture of us." for Rulie pretty please?

Reggie's not snooping through his girlfriend's stuff. Really! Swear on his grandpa's banjo.

She'd added a little too much glitter while she was decorating her phone case, and it keeps getting in her speakers and scuffing on her screen, so he figured he'd do something nice for her and pop the case off and clean it up a little, that's all.

He doesn't expect a scrap of tissue paper to fall out and unfurl, freeing a handful of Polaroids that flutter across the Molina's kitchen table.

Reggie gingerly sets Julie's phone and her case away from the photos and wipes his hands on his shirt. He carefully sifts through the pictures, doing his best to touch them as little as possible.

There's one of him and Julie with Luke and Alex that must have been taken right before their Halloween gig. They've got their arms around each other and bright grins tugging at their cheeks. Julie's incredibly cute in her gingham dress and ruby slippers and her braids, and she and Flynn went all out on helping Luke and Reggie and Alex with their costumes, transforming them into the Tin Man and the Scarecrow and the Cowardly Lion, respectively.

The next photo is one of Julie and Flynn from the same night, squishing their cheeks together and making silly faces at the camera. Only Flynn could decide to dress as the Emerald City and make it work.

There's Carrie flipping off the camera without looking away from her phone, lips twitching in a small smile, there's Luke with a guitar pick between his teeth, acoustic in hand, there's Alex and Willie smearing cookie dough batter all over one another, and there's Reggie grinning at Julie behind the camera, cheek propped in his hand, eyes glittering with affection he can't contain.

Flynn calls it his "hella heart eyes" face. She's not wrong.

The last photo makes his chest all fluttery, like someone unleashed a storm of butterflies in there. Someone did, honestly.

Julie still gives him butterflies. She bowls him over all the time, makes him weak in the knees with a single smile or a casual touch or a bright laugh, a loving look when their eyes meet. Hers are so warm, and he gets lost in their depths constantly.

They're sparkling with joy in the picture, evident even under the brim of the black cowboy hat she'd just stolen from him. The flannel she'd borrowed had been tied to look like more of a crop top, and she's stunning, the loveliest person at the square dance he'd dragged her and their friends to.

She's smiling at him, nose scrunched, leaning in close as they dance, and he's smirking, though a vibrant flush betrays how flustered she'd made him.

He'd really wanted to kiss her right then.

A tiny giggle catches him off-guard. "Reg?"

"It's not what it looks like!" he rushes to say, throwing his hands up.

Julie shakes her head, giggling harder.

"I don't mind if you look at that stuff. I wouldn't have left my phone here if I did. You just seemed really invested. Did you know that you have glitter on your cheek?"

Huh. When the heck did that get there?

Oh, he was doing the whole heart eyes, cheek-in-hand thing again. He hurriedly scrubs at his face.

Julie smiles. She reaches out and wipes the glitter away, or at least some of it. She weaves around the kitchen table and wraps her arms around him, resting her chin on his head.

"This is my favorite picture of us."

He has to swallow some of the butterflies so he can speak. "Really?"

"Yeah." She presses a light kiss into his hair. "Our Not Date, Flynn called it. I had so much fun with you that night. I almost told you that I liked you then, and I thought about kissing you, but I was worried it would ruin your night if I was totally misinterpreting everything. Flynn slapped that photo into my hand and said I couldn't be, and I should go for it. So I did."

"The very next day," Reggie murmurs. "When you brought my hat and my shirt back. The neighbors were scandalized when you kissed me on the porch."

He feels her shrug. Her voice wavers with mischief and barely-contained laughter.

"I mean, I did hold the hat up. They don't know that for sure."

He snorts. "Well, I do. And it said a lot. I really thought I was dreaming until then."

She gently tips his head back with her fingers on his chin. Her eyes shine.

"What does this kiss say?"

It's a very loud I love you, without hesitation.

Though there might be some glitter.

#rulie #reggie x julie #i love you prompts #ficlets with ash #I'm still a bit sick so I hope this makes sense #my brain has just been yelling BUTTERFLIES AND GLITTER for quite some time now lol #julie and the phantoms

[evaofkonoha]

Like seemingly everything in my life, there's a story to this one. Feeling kind of strange, so maybe I'll delete this later. Unfortunately I'm also insanely impulsive, which is winning at the moment. This is a long one, and if no one ever reads this that's honestly okay. I think I just need to get it out there for my own reasons.

To start, this song was written and recorded as my final senior project at my arts high school, so this recording is old. I performed it and provided the guitar (and tambourine!) on the track. My friend did the drums, mixed, and produced it. Another person provided piano. Okay, all credits out of the way!

I don't think I have ever honestly shared what this song is about. I didn't feel comfortable sharing it at school, so I came up with some silly, vague answer for them to read off at the final showcase and put in the Senior CD.

It's actually about my best friend in high school and I growing apart after I had moved to the arts high school. She was probably one of the best friends I have ever had. We were tight as could be. We did everything together. We even created our own fake religion (much to our parent's chagrin, I'm from the south). We called each other "fave" and even had a handshake type thing we would do. A rumor even spread that we were dating, we were that close (we thought it was hilarious, it was also not true). There were countless inside jokes. We traveled, went to any and all concerts we could afford, hung out all the time way past curfew, had sleepovers, went thrifting and vinyl hunting, almost anything and everything together.

So when I switched schools and we began to grow apart, it broke my heart. There wasn't a big blowout, no massive event. We just, grew apart. Admittedly, there was drama brewing for a while in the friend group around us (which is also sad, as I lost many close friends because of that drama as well) that I think influenced it as well.

I was doing some not-so-spring cleaning today with some stuff I picked up from my mom's house, which had a bunch of papers and notebooks and yearbooks from high school. In the box was a file folder labeled "Top Secret." There is actually nothing scandalous the file, it was just a bunch of stuff we had created and notes from when we were friends. I found a letter that this friend had written for me, and because I am so emotional, I of course cried reading it.

"Anyway, I hope you realize how talented you are. I know we tend to bash ourselves (it's our weird sarcastic behavior) but honestly speaking you have such an inspiring passion for music. Maybe this is crazy thinking, but I just know you will be successful in your music; you are so talented when you perform and the songs you write give me chills."

"I swear we have the same minds; it's so great to have someone to talk about annoying people, the government, school, relationships, music and tea :)"

God, there's more, and it all hits like a fucking truck.

So, that's what this song is actually about. Reading this made me go down memory lane, looking through old pictures with so much teenage dirtbag energy from that time (I wish I could share, but it's obvious why I'm not going to). We got up to all kinds of mischief, but it was so much fun. And it was authentic. Having someone who you can truly be yourself with and spill any and all secrets to is hard to come by.

We very occasionally chat. I actually only reached back out to her recently. We didn't communicate through all of college. Our friendship will never be the same as it was, but it's nice to not be radio silent. We have both moved on and met new people and all of that. I now live so far away from where I grew up anyway. And that's all okay because that's just life!

So, sorry if this is all oversharing, but I do really love this song. It's probably one of my best, if not my best. I wrote in during a meltdown in the shower all in one go, so a true moment of inspiration. Right now, it doesn't feel right to share it and not share the story, since sharing silly stories of my life seems to be what I do on here now I guess.

Again, I obviously can't share all of the photos and stuff that this song stirs up, except for the one I put as the song cover. I usually don't give away feet pics for free ;), but since these are socked feet in socks that we got as a symbol of our friendship (lol, yikes, haha!), I'll make an exception this once. We weren't totally bad kids I promise! Well...

ily, eva <3

[classickook]

anything for you | steven grant

pairing: steven grant x gn!reader

summary: when plans fall through with your friends at the last minute, your boyfriend swoops in to save the day.

warnings: none just fluff!

word count: 1.1k

a/n: if you’re anything like me, you’re still distraught over episode 5, so here’s a random comfort fic that doesn’t really have anything to do with the plot to cheer us all up.

you had received a call tonight, just twenty minutes before you were about to step foot outside your apartment and make the drive to meet your friends, but as it turned out, something came up—between all three of your friends, mind you—and they couldn’t make it.

“i can’t believe they cancelled on me. we had this planned for weeks,” you announced to your boyfriend as you opened the door to let him inside after you had texted him the news, and then collapsed onto your couch, disappointment and frustration evident in your tone. “i was so looking forward to seeing them.”

your shoulders drooped sadly. it was starting to become a trend, you noticed. your friends always seemed to have last minute crises or appointments that prevented them from meeting up with you. at this point, you couldn’t exactly recall the last time you had all been together. being an adult and making time for friends was proving to be harder than you had expected.

“well, it’s a good thing i’m here then, yeah?” steven added happily. his smile was kind, and the way his accent clung at the end of each word, voice soft and endearing in that way you loved, already started to lift your spirits. he was always so good to you. “we can do all those things together that you were planning with your friends.” he pulled you up off the couch and smiled sweetly, dark brown eyes twinkling from the overhead lights of your living room. he actually seemed rather excited, even eager, to be doing this with you, regardless of how silly it might have seemed. “what’s first?” he asked.

steven looked so cute in his glasses, the old frames perched on the tip of his nose and his tongue poking out in concentration. his hands were steady as they slid the small brush across each of your nails in careful and precise strokes. you were honestly impressed; he was doing a much better job at painting your nails than you could have ever done yourself.

the two of you passed the time chattering on about some gossip you had heard the other day at work, steven gasping in scandalized horror at each story. he contributed to the conversation as well, going on to tell you about his adventures at the museum. he always liked to refer to them as ‘adventures’ though he was still stuck working at the gift shop, not yet moving up to tour guide status, although you knew that he deserved it more than anyone. but he made the most of it, appreciating the opportunity to be exposed to egyptian art and history on a daily basis, spending time in different exhibits, hoping to gain additional bits and pieces of information when he could.

the conversation then segued into a retelling of a less than pleasant encounter with his boss, donna, awful woman that she was. you hated hearing about the negative things she said to steven, and you often threatened to storm the museum and give the dreadful woman a piece of your mind, but steven always brushed it aside, saying he was ‘used to it’ by now, but it broke your heart that people treated him so poorly. he was the most wonderful person you had ever met, and you just wished more people would give him a chance and take some time to really get to know him.

once he finished painting the last nail and recapped the bottle, he blew gently over your fingertips to speed up the drying process, leaving goosebumps on your skin. you leaned back to assess his handiwork and smiled widely at him.

he removed his glasses and set them aside. “what do you think?”

“this is perfect, steven,“ you said genuinely, “really, thank you.”

he looked proud yet slightly bashful at the compliment, a pretty blush coating his cheeks. “so, what’s next?”

you both agreed on a movie to watch, him offering to make popcorn as you gathered as many pillows and blankets you could find and placed them around the foot of the couch in a makeshift pillow fort.

he guided you to sit down next to him, draping his arm comfortably around your shoulders and making sure you were covered completely by the blanket. you peered over at him, noticing how the images from the television flashed across is face, strong brows furrowing slightly at the scene playing out in front of him. he must have felt your eyes on him because he turned his head in your direction, expression open as he looked at you expectantly. he was close enough that you could see each individual eyelash framing his brown eyes, and the dusting of freckles across the bridge of his nose and over the tops of his cheeks. he was so beautiful it hurt.

“what is it, love?” he asked, concern lacing his tone.

“you’re a really good boyfriend, you know that?”

he smiled shyly, gaze dropping to your joined hands in his lap.

you rested your head on his shoulder and ran your thumb back and forth over his knuckles. “really, i mean it. you didn’t have to do all of this with me. i’m sure there are other things you’d rather be doing—”

his head snapped up at that, the sudden movement shifting you off his shoulder. his eyes widened as he shook his head profusely, “no! oh no, please don’t say that,” he said worriedly. “i loved spending time with you tonight, honestly! i had fun. i would do anything with you, whatever you wanted.”

“really?”

he nodded resolutely.

“so… say i wanted to maybe go to a carnival…” you began cheekily, “you wouldn’t mind doing that with me?”

the look on his face could only be described as pure disgust but he tried to hide it so well, bless him. he swallowed then said, “if that’s what you wanted, i would go with you.”

a giggle bubbled up your throat at how determined and supportive he was trying to be, for your sake, suppressing his hatred for carnivals and the like just to make you happy. the man was far too good for you.

“i’m just teasing you, steven.” a relieved sigh pushed past his lips and you laughed a bit more at his reaction. “i don’t even like rollercoasters, and the food is horrible,” you added.

“oh, thank goodness,” he said, relief evident in the way his shoulders noticeably relaxed. “i might’ve had to break up with you if you did,” he teased and you lightly bumped his shoulder in retaliation.

he smiled at you and you felt really happy, much happier than you would have been had the plans with your friends not fallen through.

“thank you,” you said again.

he kissed your temple. “anything for you.”

you both continued watching the movie until you began to drift off, and steven urged your body to rest against his comfortably as you slept. “goodnight, love,” he whispered.

#moon knight #moon knight fic #moon knight fanfiction #steven grant #steven grant x reader #steven grant x you #steven grant x y/n #steven grant fic #steven grant fanfiction #steven grant imagine #oscar isaac

[lovelyyandereaddictionpoint]

Yandere Riddle Roseheart x Reader

Someone had an ask about Twisted Wonderland that I accidently deleted 

I hope they find this though

🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤

Riddle Roseheart: the man with a plan to get his feelings across to a dense, non-magic student. 

Since his unbirthday party you had become his friend. A title far from what you were calling him before then. ‘Tyrant’ and ‘prissy baby’ were words he swore were mumbled under your breath when he passed by. It hurt him a little a lot and it made him really angry. Subsequently he may have overreacted when one of your little friends was the one to rob him of his delicious tart. But now that you were aware of his past and had helped your other friends save him from his overblotting you were an entirely different person. 

“Oh Rose!! I want you to try this new recipe, here.”

“Oh Rosey-baby you look so thin, have a cookie!” 

It honestly is one of his favorite things to happen whenever he sees you. You just totally filled a spot in his heart he never would’ve imagined you would fill. He was obsessed with it though. The tickling in his tummy any time you giggled. Or the whiff of your scent whenever you hugged him or sat next to him in class. You were so touchy–a trait on anyone but you that would leave him disgusted. With his newly relaxed attitude your constant attention was embarrassing, but he wholeheartedly accepted. But he just couldn’t get enough of how much of you was devoted to him. Allowing himself to be pulled into your lap while hanging out or how you so dutifully check in on him to make sure he’s relaxing. This was perfect. You were so nurturing. So sweet~You were the perfect one just for him. And with how forward you were with these advances it was practically fate. You were already so willingly accepting the role of his queen, all that was left was your name and signature. 

“You know they’re babying you, right?” 

The monster spoke rudely, chewing the tuna he had received. Grim watched as the dorm leader stopped in his tracks, not turning just listening. He sighed axasperatedly: Geez, this kid is practically delusional.

“Told me themself, you remind them of their baby half-brother.”

Gloved hands tightly held the corners of the photos he had commissioned. Deep down he knew it but he wanted to ignore it, just like how he’s been ignoring his desire to enforce the rules around the dorm. Despite a certain monster’s beliefs Riddle Roseheart was not delusional. He was the sharpest and most capable mind in the school. You would eventually get the picture, he would make sure of it. 

____________________

“(Y/n)-san would you like to go on a stroll with me?”

He was interrupting a conversation between you and that Ace-kid. He hardly listened to whatever banter you two had about leaving so suddenly; he just couldn’t find what on earth made him so interesting. Eventually you got up and allowed yourself to hook your arm with his. He tried to fight the heat that wanted to bloom on his face. YOU WERE SO CLOSE. He maintained his calm persona casually talking about the silliness of the boys in his dorm. Responding accordingly you were distracting him with your enchanting being. Gathering up the courage he starts a new conversation which was the main goal from the beginning.

“(Y/n)-san..by any chance do you see me as a man?” Perfect question!!! It followed all the guidelines of the subtle flirty question. The question of his masculinity! The slight hint of probing! The scandal that your response may cause! This was the perfect way to get you to at least consider it.

“I see you as a young man.” You so blankly responded, oblivious to his ghastly face. As if to add on to the pain you continued, “Like if you were my baby brother all grown up! Yeah, just like that!” 

You smiled at the memory, unhooking your arm to hold the little red-head in a noogie. Riddle on the other hand was stuck dealing with the pain in his heart rather than the irritation of your hand digging his hair. You didn’t even flinch! Hesitate, even! As he settled into your form he started concocted his next move. 

“What about as a boyfriend?”

“What do you mean?” You were rocking your hanging legs while sitting on the counter of the school’s kitchen. You both were waiting on the timer for your pie. 

“I mean…could you see me as that? As a boyfriend?”

It was silent and for a moment he was sure his message got to you. But all it took was the ring of the time to set you off.

“Hahhaahaahaaa-” You just wouldn’t stop now. He inhaled while pinching the bridge of his nose; this was an absolute fail. Adding insult to injury you were barely hanging on to the counter as you continued laughing. The timer rang but it was hardly anything to you, who was bawling with how hard you were laughing.

He needed a new strategy

_____________________

Sipping his herbal tea he waited for the response from his longtime compatriots Che’nya and Trey. The only two,he could trust with advice on his newfound obsession. 

“Hmm, maybe you should just outright tell them…?”

“Fufufu~(Y/n)-chi is too honest!” 

Trey shot the Cheshire student a glare as Riddle deflated into his chair. Looking at the remaining tea-grounds in his tea cup it truly felt hopeless. Were you really that dense? Or were you just stringing him along? Was this attempt at achieving happiness worth nothing? 

He shared his concerns and just as he’d expect he was offered a solution.

“Nye~what about the ‘Heart cake?’”

“You mean the ‘Heart cake?’” 

Riddle was perplexed. What were they being so secretive about?

“What Heart cake?”

“Chen’ya! We shouldn’t even be putting that idea on the table…yet.” 

“Fufufu~yet? Don’t we want our dearest Red to be happy?”

Trey seemed to falter looking at the mischievous yellow eyes of the cheshire then at the blue eyes of Riddle who was openly showing his nervous expression. The clover card exhaled before rising from his seat and motioning with his head for Riddle to follow. Following silently in the nearly empty halls of Night Raven college they entered the kitchen after checking for any peering eyes. 

Locking the door behind him Trey conjured a black paper and delicately set it on the counter, he then cast a spell that made the room colder. Riddle could feel a familiar coldness in the room, a familiar darkness that silently assured him. Following his childhood friend’s instruction he gathered the various ingredients to create this secret weapon: the Heart Cake. True to its name it was shaped like a cake and of course followed with his theme of red and white. 

“So I just have to feed this to them?” 

“Yes, just make sure they’re not anywhere high or near a hard surface.”

“?”

“Okay, just make sure they're somewhere soft.”

_______________________

Arriving at the Ramshackle dorm, he shivered as he heard something scurry beneath the door. Nonetheless he balanced the cake box in one arm as he knocked with the other remembering to wash that hand. Hearing your lovely voice going back and forth with that little monster grew as you came to welcome him in. 

“Rosey? What are you doing here so late?” 

He turned on the charm and puckered his lips, playing the part you saw him in anyway. 

“(Y/n)-sama I was having trouble sleeping and in a daze I made something I want you to try.”

“Why would you-?””AWWWW SWEET BABY! Come on in, I'll help you however I can.”

Grim’s suspicions were overridden by your cooing and the immediate entry of the smug Heartslaybul dormleader. You sat him on your bed saying something along the lines of ‘tucking him into bed would be just what he needed to fall fast asleep.’ As he sat on your bed tracing his finger in the (Y/n) shaped dent in the mattress, he resisted the urge to crawl into the place. Ignoring Grim’s objections you ran off saying something along the lines of ‘how some milk and a bedtime story would do just the trick!’ 

Left alone with Grim he changed his demeanor to one that mirrored his original sterness as he retrieved a stamped note from his pocket. 

“Here, this will grant access to the Heartslaybul dorm for tonight where there will be unlimited tuna cans for you.”

Hardly finishing his sentence the little monster came and swiped the card, already drooling. Before fully hovering away he turned back to Riddle with his suspicions. 

“Why are you suddenly being so generous? You didn’t ask for any pictures this time.”

Smirking he spoke, “I want you out of here for the night. Can you do that?”

“Y-you’re not doing something naughty are you?” 

Riddle shot him a look and the monster shrugged and flew away vaguely voicing his future location. You shook it off as you returned with a cup of milk, a plate and fork. 

“Ahhh drink this and I’ll tell you a story.”

You told him the story of Beauty and the Beast, a  story with a villain that sounded awfully familiar but he didn’t comment. Finishing his cup quickly he questioned if you would try his cake. You giggled, as if he were some stupid kid, “No way silly! It’s too close to bedtime, I’d get nightmares.”

“Then what if I told you a story?”  

Taking advantage of your surprise he sat you down on the bed getting up to slice you a piece of the cake. Sitting with your plate of cake, you let him cozy into your shoulder as he told his story. 

“Once upon a time there was an insolent intruder…”

He watched your plump lips wrap around the fork holding the cake that would fix everything. 

“They made a ruckus all about the kingdom, eventually catching the attention of its benevolent king…”

You had another slice.

“They became the closest that was ever possible…”

You were nearly done with the whole cake.

“But the intruder tricked the king…”

You were blinking profusely. Rubbing your eyelids.

“And they always slipped past the king’s advances…”

You were nodding off, barely able to listen to the dorm leader.

“So he put them in a trap…”

He pushed at your shoulders, guiding you to lay in your bed.

“A good trap..that will help make them both just the happiest they can be…”

Your eyelids flickered, fighting sleep even as your guest curled lovingly into your shoulder. 

“So why don’t you just sleep, the king would be awfully pleased if you did.”

Lightly rubbing his hand over your delicate lids; encouraging them to close, succeeding by the second time.

“By the time you wake up, you’ll quite like this trap.

And you’ll know to love me the way I do you” ♥️

#yandere x reader #yandere twisted wonderland #yandere riddle rosehearts #yandere riddle roseheart x reader #twisted wonderland #twst wonderland #twst wonderland riddle #lovelyyandereaddictionpoint #yandere otome #yanderes x reader #yanderes #twst #twst riddle #twst x reader

[absolutebl]

what's your opinion on homophobic actors ? for example the love by chance cast and their scandal with earth? there might be other homophobic ones idk about but I was just using that as a example I still want you're overall thoughts! would you still watch their stuff? or follow them? or another example actors admiting they used bl as a way for clout some people think thats okay and its justified would you agree?

BL Actor Homophobia 

Oh boy. I don't really follow actor drama. Or I try not to. And I kinda don’t want do this, but I guess I should do a sort of official statement thingy. Since this fun silly side blog of mine has sort of gotten bloated and out of my control. 

Like the giant peach. 

ALT

In general, I think it's difficult to understand any celebrity's actual feelings on anything. 

 Sometimes it may not be safe for them to express their true opinion, because of image, brand, business, studio, agency, management, or family concerns or constraints. They may be more supportive or less supportive than we will ever know. Anything that approaches bullying is going to be even more complex because there are so many elements, perspectives, and entities involved. (Although I will always side with the victim.) 

With regards to interview, vlog, or variety show missteps and misspeaks, a lot of BL actors are BABIES, like so young. Tell me you didn't make a stupid fucking idiot statement when you were in your late teens and early 20s. Well, you CAN tell me you didn't, but I won't believe you. I certainly did. I was a pretty lousy human for a while. Queer af but still lousy. 

And a bunch of queers from other countries jumping in and attacking is surely going to change baby boy’s tiny mind... right? Yeah, no. No, it’s not. Multiple studies have shown that attacking someone only drives them into a corner and hardens their sentiments. 

Honestly? I don't think it's ever a good idea to make a hero out of an actor... they are, after all, ACTORS. I mean, come on, you must have meet some of the breed? 

Make a hero of the BL character he portrayed, certainly! But not the actor for goodness sake. He’s only an actor, after all. 

Celebrity turns people... odd. Or maybe it's just that the type of personality that seeks celebrity is innately suspicious? At least to this curmudgeonly introvert. (The fact that I all too often end up dating the fuckers is my terrible judgement and wicked bad taste.)

Where was I?

In most of these cases netizens take everything out of context, or at the very least hugely exaggerate. People pick camps. Yes there are certainly bad apples, but I think about this with kpop a lot, sometimes it's all shades of grey and no celebrity is as evil, or as good, as we want them to be. They're mostly just gloriously shiny narcissistic pricks (affectionate).

Particularly with something like homophobia, the context of identity (or identity erasure or abuse) is very culture specific. With BL we are often talking about places where, until recently, they didn’t even have a word for gay. I don't like to get outraged in general, it's exhausting. But to get outraged about something that some pretty kid said or did, in a language I don't speak, born and raised in a culture I did not grow up in, to a family dynamic I cannot comprehend?

It seems like, considering all the grey areas, I am not really equip to judge.

It's not the same thing, but I'm a long time melody and I often think about what happened to Ilhoon. As an outsider what he went through seems absolutely insane. But I've never lived in South Korea. What the hell do I know? I can only make a judgement call from my safe little nest where (currently) weed is legal and has been for ages. I guess, at the very least being in Kpop should have taught Ilhoon how to be careful enough not to get caught? 

And I guess that's were I do judge.

If the actor is homophobic (by any standards), and acts in BLs, at the very least he shouldn't have gotten his tiny hypocritical arse caught out, now should he? Tut tut on the brand management, fella. Practice a little circumspection. 

Oof. My cynic is showing.

Look, I’m not that bad, I’m just an old tired queer. We’ve been fighting a long time. Can’t I pass the buck (or blunt or cock) along? 

Mostly when one of these stories crosses my radar I just feel sad. And I don't wanna feel that way around BL (or Kpop for that matter), so I try not to even register it's happening. 

Here, you wanna get outraged, get outraged about this: 

ALT

There are major cultural issues in play here, and when this kind of thing happens to an idol on the streets of Seoul, I’d venture to say, there’s society wide systemic problems at the root of of this kind of homophobia, that the homophobe’s are manifesting - like symptoms of a disease. Sure you can treat the pox (with a damp wet white towel, perhaps?), but darlings don’t you think it’s about time we developed a vaccine? (And maybe I think that’s kinda what BL and pop culture can do to culture, if it gets normalized enough.) 

But currently, with these homophobic incidents? We all lose, and we are all to be pitied because of it. 

I love BL because it leads with love, and that’s the best I can practice at this point in my life. Try to talk more about positive BL dramas and less about negative BL actor drama. Try to be a little more loving and a little less outraged. 

That’s it, I don’t have a solution, sorry. Just... perseverance, I guess? su su na and all that.  

(source)

[wp-blaze]

The art of obsession and why every detail matters

Life as a perfectionist is challenging and can factually foster inadequacy. Focusing on attention to detail, however, is beneficial for success and culminates in high-quality outcomes.

[unpretty]

askdump with spoilers up to chapter 22! but also including some older ones because i keep forgetting

bramblepatch asked:

I LOVE the implication that the answer to Minnow's "cool, I wonder why there would be a door here?" is that Vaelon decided "cool, let's put a door here." Heroes Just Wanna See Cool Shit.

being able to set your own fast travel markers is the dream

@apparently-possessed asked:

I can't believe no one has commented on how Karzarul has the gall to call the Abysscale erotica scandalous. You made them to have sex with sailors you horny buffoon. You go off and find them in

Groups for frustrated sex.

No excuse my dude. They have always been the horny monster.

that was a PRIVATE INTERLUDE between a monster and several different ships worth of sailors and also sometimes other monsters and someone was INDISCREET which is RUDE and he would not have invited them if he'd known they would snitch

also tbh he was mostly offended by the implication that he was some kind of monster bimbo

anonymous asked:

"Monsters that are just slime orbs would have implications" yes, because the entire design and origin of Abysscales is completely without implications.

i find those implications less distressing tbh

@bramblepatch asked:

On rereading the last couple of chapters: as tragic as Vaelon's wish binding them all together is, it kind of seems like it might not be all bad for the world around them? Lynette already had her blessing at that point and I feel like a Sunlight Heir who didn't have that kind of persistent connection to the Hero and Monster would have the potential to go waaaay off the rails a lot more often than Heirs do anyway. Karzarul might be the one blatantly causing problems on most cycles, but having him and the Hero active when the Heir comes to power at least keeps them focused on their reincarnation bullshit...

you cannot deny that the hero does try to stop them from killing each other and also everyone else

he never said he'd succeed

@spinachwrap asked:

BIGGEST BOY It took me til chapter 20 to understand how Violet and the boys showed up and I about yelled. New! Monsters!!!

@asimovsideburns asked:

Sorry I’m just thinking about Astielle again and most if not all of Ari’s humanoid forms being at least partly imitative of someone he likes (and the others being made of what he thinks they’ll like) because moonlight is a reflection

@ephemeraltea asked:

part of what i love so much about your writing, particularly noticeable in astielle, is that you take a silly or off-hand thing and make it have true depth and emotional weight. like. collect one of everything from this open world video game. but for minnow, it's proof that she has desires outside of previous lives, that her experiences are not just slowly pixelating copies of things she's done before. this flower, i know i've seen it as me, because i have it pressed and saved at home. i have a memory of it that is only mine. and that fucking gets me!!!!

anonymous asked:

Karzarul getting all huffy about monsters naming themselves after descriptors *shakes my head* This is a TRADITION OF YOUR PEOPLE carried out EVEN TO THIS DAY *gestures to Violet who is... violet* I don't want to hear anything from you on the topic Mr. Beautiful.

anonymous asked:

RE: Karzarul getting huffy. It's probably influenced by the little Vaelon voice in the back of his head repeating "But that isn’t really a name..." over and over again, but still. I don't want to hear it from you, Mr. Beautiful!

anonymous asked:

Just from the way Karzarul responds to being told Elias died of being old with an Unconvinced Hm™ it seems like he knows about the immortality thing. But maybe they DO start aging after one (or more) of them dies?

@ceruleanvulpine asked:

RETURN OF “I WANT YOU WHATEVER YOULL GIVE ME” AHHHH

anonymous asked:

MA'AM. MA'AM HOW COULD YOU. I can't believe you did this to us VAELON NO

listen. i did it to myself also.

@punkpixieprince asked:

god even when I KNEW how it ended I still cried SO MUCH. I'm still crying right NOW. I imagined it in so many ways but honestly knowing it was an accident, that even after everything he killed her on accident, just really... destroyed me a little.

anonymous asked:

Vaelon: If I like everything *just the right amount* and not too much, then I won't want to commit suicide when it's gone. FORTUNATELY, I only have one person that applies to. And EXTRA fortunately she is now immortal. ... UNFORTUNATELY, there are now TWO people. EXTRA unfortunately, they are now trying to kill each other.

it turns out having gratitude-based cbt and existential nihilism as your religion has its limits as a depression treatment when literally no one around you has ever noticed that's what you're doing

anonymous asked:

What Vaelon Says: I don’t want any of us to be alone. What Vaelon Means: I don't want to be alone, and I don't mind leaving Karzarul alone if it means I can avoid being without one of the two people I can't live without.

vaelon has always vastly overestimated the extent to which karzarul wandered off to hang out with the many cool new monster friends his mom made him, and who he never wanted to introduce him to

anonymous asked:

Excited about the first mention of Moon priests. Also enjoy having my personal belief that the Sun priests are insufferable validated. Vaelon is STILL the only Void priest in evidence, ever. Understandable, seems like a difficult calling. *imagines poor little deluded Star priests running around in modern times being VERY WRONG*

anonymous asked:

They get a little mark on their hand to show who killed who? Does that work with people not-them? Did Leland wander around with a little sun on his hand from killing all the heirs? Is that how he's been telling everyone HE's the heir??? Did it happen to some random guardsman the first time and then Leland murdered him to try and get it himself? *chanting* Mark of Cain, Mark of Cain!

anonymous asked:

Idk if I should be happy or devastated for predicting what would happen for the most part in chapter 21 and 22. But also wth the sun on his hand???? Where are those terms and heckin conditions please tell me those were as immutable as the weapons

anonymous asked:

That Lynette died with her left hand clean makes me feel violent emotions. How many? Monsters with Vaelon’s face and deaths that Karzarul could feel. Enough to get used to it. She waited until he said he wasn’t connected to them. She spat monster like a slur. Sun circle advisors whispered in the ear of a woman who’d asked to be able to commit atrocities that her empire was the world. You’re too good at this, I don’t know if I can recover.

(☞ﾟヮﾟ)☞

anonymous asked:

Yeah, Lynette. You never asked for help, AND THAT'S THE PROBLEM.

anonymous asked:

“Why is it always my fault?” That's a very valid question, Karzarul. I can't think of any time the other two attempted to accommodate you, other than Vaelon mentioning he started helping people because he knew it bothered you, or him taking you back to the lake when you were in visible physical distress. Even when you hadn't done anything to cross her empire, when the only thing you'd taken from her was a small amount of Vaelon's attention, Lynette blamed you.

anonymous asked:

“Of all the fucking things you could have done, You made a new one. Another fucking monster, with his face. Do you think that’s going to stop me? Or do you think you’re proving something, making me kill him? Having to see his face, again and again and again, every time I kill one of those fucking things? His face, staring back at me, every fucking time and now you’ve made another one." ...Not everything is about YOU Lynette.

anonymous asked:

I loved learning that Vaelon designed Karzarul's moon/bug motifs.

anonymous asked:

Gaslight (Karzarul about things being his fault), Gatekeep (Karzarul away from Vaelon because if you can't have him *the way you want him* nobody can have him), Girlboss (of an empire that is actually only negatively impacting your mental health and it would be better for you to ditch that gig)

karzarul just hated to see a girlboss winning 😔

#original #writeblogging #astielleblogging #astielle spoilers

[1kook]

commercial break; SEVEN

this is part of my netflix & chill series ! happens a few months before part 7 

summary; And lastly, Jungkook will bring it full circle by indulging you two in some good old fashion spooky sex where he nuts inside you because the only thing scarier than a scary movie is a pregnancy scare. It’s a perfect plan.  warnings; horny jk, jk wants to roleplay... everyone point n laugh, mentions of his impreg kink lol, making out, tits, honestly jk is just very horny n in love lol, jk in a vampire costume w fangs O_o rating; mature (18+) wc; 2k

notes; if u don’t know who lindsay is first of all ur sick, second of all here’s my queen’s top moments. also i just gotta say, this was originally gonna be a larger fic (a halloween special) for my ncouple, but i got a lil busy with school n ultimately didn't have time to invest in this as a whole installment so..... enjoy this commercial break instead!!

Jungkook loves Halloween.

He loves the pumpkin carving and the decorating. Loves the spooky music and the abundance of candy. He loves it, absolutely adores it, and for the second year in a row, he gets to spend it with you! Yet another person he loves very much.

He doesn’t remember ever being this excited for Halloween. Last year, you had roped him into going to some frat party with him, had egged him on, begged so cutely that it was your last year in college, baby until he caved. The two of you had spent the night drinking until you blacked out, Ubering home with your costumes half on, and then unceremoniously fucking in his living room with the blinds wide open.

(The next neighborhood meeting had been very awkward for Jungkook.)

It was his first time ever drinking with you like that, and he vaguely remembers, through his own drunken gaze, how cool you had been. Had absolutely owned a bunch of greasy football players at beer pong in your little sexy nurse costume. And when the crowd cheered your name, shrieked in awe, it had been him that you turned to for praise. “Did you see me, baby,” you had giggled, crowded him against the wall of this random house until Jungkook was sweating profusely. In lieu of a costume, he had worn a silly jogger set with a skeleton design that was supposed to glow in the dark, according to Amazon. You had told him he looked adorable, had kissed and squeezed his cheeks until Jungkook was a flustered mess.

It was still early into your relationship— if Jungkook did the math, you were only about five months in at that point —so he didn’t know how else to cope with the rapid thundering of his heart, the confession sitting on his tongue, the then scary L-word begging to be heard. So, he took you home and fucked you until your little nurse cap slid off your head and you were begging for him to let you cum, thus earning him his first ever offense for violating the neighborhood rules (i.e., traumatizing a group of middle schoolers by fucking in plain sight).

Long story short, Jungkook loves Halloween, and he loves it even more when he gets to spend it with you.

(He’ll never admit it, but he’s a hard romantic. He wants to do cheesy things with you, like cuddle you into his arms when you get scared, pat your head until you can look at whatever is happening on screen again. He wants you to feel safe in his arms, wants to be your refuge when things become too much. He likes to think he’s done a pretty good job so far.)

Jungkook’s plan goes like this:

First, welcome you with that Halloween basket you’ve been sending him tweet links about all month. The cute little Jack-O-lantern candy bucket stuffed with candy and hair ties and a soft Halloween themed blanket. It’s so cheesy, makes him blush when he catches sight of it in his closet, but Jungkook will do anything to please you.

Next, after presenting you with your Halloween gift and having you coo and tell him he’s a good boy, he’ll invite you to break your new soft blanket in. The living room will be prepared with an assortment of your favorite foods, the flat screen ready to play whatever horror movie the two of you settle on.

And lastly, Jungkook will bring it full circle by indulging you two in some good old fashion spooky sex where he nuts inside you because the only thing scarier than a scary movie is a pregnancy scare.

It’s a perfect plan.

It’s the best way to spend his favorite holiday, with his favorite girl by his side and some of his favorite horror films on the big screen. Jungkook spends all of October geeked up for it, even considers hanging up lights around the living room to really set the mood. He’s so excited, can’t wait to spend another wonderful holiday at home with you, that he doesn’t fully realize why you haven’t brought up the long awaited topic of costumes.

“You like?” you ask, standing at the door of his bathroom with a sultry look in your eye, tits practically pouring out of the tight top you’ve wiggled into, skin oiled up scandalously. He fumbles with the fake vampire fang prosthetics he’d been trying to glue in for the better half of an hour.

He had heard the door open downstairs when you got here, had called out his mandatory greeting as he heard you come up the stairs. But none of that had prepared him for the sight of you in… whatever this was.

Jungkook doesn’t really understand exactly what you’re supposed to be dressed up as until the two of you are back downstairs—blinds drawn, full moon slipping in through the cracks—with some random horror movie pulled up on the TV. “I’m Lindsey,” you whine, brand new fluffy blanket wrapped around your shoulders. It shields your boobs from view, but he’s not sure if that’s a win or a loss. “From Total Drama Island!”

He settles in beside you, doesn’t get too comfortable because it’s nearing sundown now and he knows the herds of children are bound to start flowing in. “Uh huh,” he says mindlessly. His collar feels itchy, the overly-detailed vampire costume he meticulously scoured the internet for being one size too small. You snuggle into his side anyway.

“You don’t know anything about cinematic masterpieces,” you frown, avidly tuned into The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning, because apparently you love horror movies all of a sudden, a fact that genuinely throws Jungkook off. He’s not sure what it is about you that had deluded him into thinking you would be a scaredy cat, but he doesn’t take the new bit of information too hard.

The doorbell rings right as the first gorey scene ends and you make a big show of huffing and whining as he rushes to answer it. But it’s only the beginning of the long night that awaits, and, as Jungkook comes to find, running back and forth from the door to the couch is harder than it seems.

Anyway, Jungkook’s neighborhood is a little posh, or ‘bougie’ as you like to claim, and trick-or-treating hours end a little before eleven pm. By then he’s tired, having refused your offer to switch places in fear that your boob might fall out of that scrap of fabric you call a top and earn him his second neighborly offense.

However, that doesn’t mean he’s opposed to your boobs falling out in private.

“Stupid,” you giggle when he gets caught in his long cape, the sound slowly melting into a whimper as he slips his hands beneath your top, fighting with the ridiculous push-up bra you’ve donned tonight. Hands tangle in his hair, mess up the careful side part he’d styled up for tonight, and legs lock around his waist. “Your curtains closed?” you tease.

He huffs, catches your chatty lips with his roughly, presses and presses until your mouth must bruise. He belatedly remembers about those sharp fangs he’d glued on—hey, if he was going to dress up as some gaudy monster it might as well be realistic—and doesn’t realize until he tries to bite your neck and you let out a little yelp. Truthfully, he feels bad right away, but then you’re practically dissolving in his arms so he plays along. “Shh,” he hisses.

The roar of a chainsaw and terrified screams fill the living room, almost drowning out the soft sounds you release by his ear. “O- Or what?” you pant, flinch when he pushes your sad excuse of a skirt up over your waist. “Gonna b- bite me?”

And so Jungkook does.

You shriek. “That hurts, you idiot!” you scold with a tiny whine in your voice, but Jungkook’s cock is so hard. Your tiny, tight outfit does you no favors. Tits in his face, tiny thong against his bulge. He wants to make you sob, litter bites and marks all over your skin until his love makes you ache. You must see the crazed look in his eyes, because you drop the scowl. “Hey,” you say slowly, hand on his chest. “You look like you’re gonna eat me.”

He lets go of a breath he hadn’t known he was holding. He wonders if you can feel his thundering heart beneath your palm. “Fuck,” he sighs, leaning away to regain his senses. Was it something in the air? Was it the fatigue? The full moon? Why did he want to fold you in half and fuck his cock into you until you were a crying, shivering mess? Something about you tonight, laid out for him to take, makes him feel absolutely insane. Starved and psycho; he just wants to take and take until you don’t have anything more to give. He purses his lips, tries to ignore the hot feeling in his lower abdomen when your hardened nipples register to his eyes. “I think I’m becoming evil.”

Of all the idiotic things his brain can come up with, this one is definitely top five. His cheeks flush right after, fueled by the boisterous laughter that escapes your lips at his statement. “Oh my god,” you gasp in glee, hands falling down beside your head. “You’re becoming evil?’

Jungkook frowns, flopping down on top of you to hide the embarrassment that paints his face. “Shut up,” he mumbles against your neck, warm and safe.

A hand cards through the back of his hair, nails dig lightly into his scalp. “Aren’t you the cutest little vampire,” you coo, seemingly ignoring the rock hard cock Jungkook presses against your thigh. He’s still so horny, has this sick thought that he could just pin you down right here, tear that silly costume to shreds and swallow you up in his lust. But your voice is so sweet, has his eyes fluttering shut as you gather him in his arms. “Silly vampire,” you hum, one leg thrown around his hip, a subtle roll of you hips up into him.

Jungkook huffs, licks a flat strip along the base of your neck. It draws a shaky exhale from you, has your hands digging into his back when he begins to slowly lap against the skin, nibble and tug until your back is deliciously arching up into him. “Wanna push you down,” he confesses quietly, hands securing themselves against your hips as he leans back. You're all dazed, eyes trained on his fanged mouth when he hesitantly adds, “l- little human.”

You could laugh, tease him for his sudden weird need to role play with you, but you don’t. A look of understanding crosses your face, sly smirk slowly following. “Oh?” you grin, hand coming around to cup his cheek. “The little vampire wants to use my body?” Jungkook tightens his jaw at your jab, but nods nonetheless.

You’re a feast before his eyes. Boobs in his face, pussy begging to be filled. You’re his, just like Jungkook is yours. And when you indulge him and his stupid whims—kinks, he should say, occasional interests that sometimes make him question himself—his heart feels warm and full. Proud and unashamed, like the truest version of himself when you look at him with those eyes. And your words only confirm it.

Your hands reach down for your top, pull the flimsy material over your head in one swoop that has your bra coming off with it. It drops to the floor. If it makes a sound, Jungkook doesn’t hear it over the shrieks of terror on screen. the blood deaths, the suspenseful music. All he hears is he hammering of his heart. 

It’s two of your sneaky fingers that come up to play, pinch one nipple tenderly as you meet his eyes. “It’s all yours,” you purr. “I’m all yours.”

And the thirst he feels, well. It’s a little vampiric, to say the least. 

—

Copyright © 2020, 1kook on tumblr. absolutely NO reposts allowed.

#bangtanhq #networkbangtan #jungkook smut #jeon jungkook smut #jjk♡ #jungkook fic #jungkook x reader #jungkook x reader smut #jeon jeongguk smut #jeongguk smut #mine

[beyondspaceandstars]

While You Sleep

Chapter 14

Relationship: Bucky Barnes x Reader Warnings: depictions of panic attack, suggestive content Summary: Soulmate!AU - Throughout life, you’re given glimpses of your soulmate through dreams. As you sleep, memories flash in your mind showing you the life your soulmate has lived. Everyone around you raves about how their soulmate reads great books or volunteers in their spare time. But you can’t relate as your dreams end up being more like nightmares. Through initial images of death and violence, you come to learn your soulmate is the Winter Soldier.

Masterlist | Series Masterlist

After a couple of days had passed, Bucky had approached you with the idea of going on another date. At first, you were greatly hesitant. The memories of the Hydra man telling you their first glimpse of you was during a date couldn’t escape your mind. You had brought it up to Bucky as gently as you could but he assured you, you had nothing to worry about. Those at the facilities were…”gone.” He had simply put it at that. You didn’t want to think about how deep the organization may actually run seeing as they had been able to be under the radar for a while. But you forced yourself to put the rest of your great concerns away and, eventually, agreed to a date. 

Bucky thought the movies could be a fun thing for you two to do. He admitted he hadn’t been to one in quite some time and was interested to see what was out there in terms of genres. That led you two to sitting at the kitchen counter in the compound, leaning over the newspaper, skimming the movie showtimes. You didn’t have the heart to tell him you could've just looked this up on your phone.

“What about an action movie?” Bucky asked. You scooted your stool closer to read the title he was pointing at. You had to admit, you were getting pretty comfortable at the compound, having declared this one particular stool yours in the kitchen. You were harboring a lot of concerns over your apartment. It still sat in your mind as the, well, the initial scene of the crime. The start of that incident. Thankfully, no one seemed bothered by your extended stay and you thought Bucky seemed to secretly enjoy playing house in this capacity. 

“I don’t know,” you shrugged. “They’re so hit or miss. We might not like it.”

Bucky hummed. “If we don’t like it, it’ll just give us an excuse to make out.”

You couldn’t help the small giggle that escaped your lips. It was a rare occurrence lately and Bucky always looked relieved when you’d show any signs of getting closer to peace. “Is that why you want to go to the movies, Buck?”

Your soulmate scoffed, shaking his head with a little cheeky grin. “You mean to tell me you really watched every movie you went on a date to see?”

“Oh, hush,” you smirked back as Bucky playfully rolled his eyes. “I guess nothing really changes over the years.”

This banter was good - it felt good. You weren’t in pristine condition but this was maybe showing some progress. Crying in bed with Bucky seems like a lifetime away despite just being a day or so ago. Concerns of various formats weren't vanishing so fast, though. Especially in the realm of nightmares. You hadn’t brought it up to anyone but it was like something had reset in the bond. While they weren’t as obnoxious, you weren’t getting dreams of Bucky reading or any cute shit like that.

“How about a horror movie? That could be fun,” Bucky said. “I can hold you when you get scared.”

You bit your lip. “Who said I get scared during horror movies?”

Bucky shook his head, letting out a light laugh. “You’re making this impossible, doll.” 

Before you could tell him to quit it, someone entered the kitchen. The person came up behind you two and began looking over your shoulder at the movie times. “Going to the movies?” Steve asked. 

You and Bucky turned to him, nodding. “We can’t figure out what we want to see, though.”

Steve hummed as his eyes raked over the page. “How about a romance?” He suggested. “Bucky used to cry his eyes out over those.”

Immediately, Bucky began spewing protests left and right calling Steve the biggest liar while you couldn’t help but genuinely crack up at the situation. It was a nice thing, you thought, sitting here laughing over something silly between Bucky and Steve. Almost like you were getting on and everything was figuring itself out. Maybe today would be the day it all finally took a turn. 

“Alright, alright,” you said, trying to calm Bucky. Steve looked greatly amused while your soulmate was just annoyed. “I think that’s settled then. My curiosity has peaked. I wanna see a romance.”

Bucky groaned. “It happened one time.”

Steve shrugged. “Maybe she can hold you just in case it happens again.”

“Thanks, Steve,” Bucky scoffed. “Want to share anything else with her? Any other embarrassing stories from back in the day you think she just desperately needs to hear?”

You looked excitedly towards Steve. “Yeah, Steve, is there anymore?”

He smirked. “Trust me, there’s plenty. But I wouldn’t want to waste them all now. I’ll save them for your wedding day.” And with that, Steve nodded, possibly quite proud of himself for dropping that, and exited the kitchen, back on his path to wherever he was going. He left you two practically with a bomb. 

Wedding day - the idea of that was something that has never crossed your mind. And from the looks of it, neither had it crossed Bucky’s. It wasn’t uncommon for soulmates to get married. Most didn’t see the purpose outside of the legal side but you didn’t fall into that. You were hopelessly guilty of daydreaming about your wedding day...

Bucky cleared his throat. “So,” he looked back at the paper, “romance it is, then?”

You took a deep breath, snapping your thoughts back into place. “Sure.”

***

Steve’s claim hadn't been that too far off. As you two were exiting the theater, having just watched an hour and a half of two people being oblivious when it comes to love, Bucky wouldn’t meet your eyes. You were commenting on the movie but he was stuck looking at the hem of your dress. You had gone with a light sundress having not much effort to get that dressed up but still wanting to look good for your man. It was decorated with little polka dots. Apparently, the dots were the most fascinating thing in the world to Bucky.

“Bucky,” you nudged him as you were walking down the street, “are you even listening to me?”

“Hmm?” Bucky jumped, his eyes finally meeting yours. And sure enough, they were wet. You couldn’t help the little giggle that escaped you.

“Steve wasn’t kidding,” you smiled, “romances really get to you, huh?”

Bucky playfully rolled his eyes and looked away. You took the opportunity to take your hand in his as you two continued your walk. 

After a moment, you spoke again, “There’s nothing to be embarrassed about, Buck. I think it’s quite endearing.”

He scoffed. “You’re just saying that.”

“I am not,” you protested. “I think it’s very sweet you love love that much. I see it when we’re together.”

Bucky finally turned back to you. “Really?” He asked so gently. His eyes had a glimmer of hope in them. Your heart was melting. 

“Of course.”

Abruptly, he stopped you two right there on the sidewalk. He looked like an absolute dream in his nice shirt and slacks, illuminated just by the glow of the night and the flickering street lamps. He was looking at you like you had hung the moon and stars. You went to ask why you two were stopped but before you could, Bucky’s lips were on yours. They were so soft and gentle yet fierce and loving. You had forgotten how much he channeled in these kisses as you hadn’t been quite intimate since before the kidnapping. You had been scared, quite honestly. Despite the sequence of events not exactly being related, the last time you slept with your soulmate you were whisked away. It was a stupid, ridiculous fear you felt slowly dissipating the more your lips moved in sync. 

Suffice with the moment but leaving a bit to tease, Bucky eventually pulled away. “Let’s get back to the compound.”

You bit your lip a bit more hesitantly than you had intended but still nodded. You knew where this was going and you had to run with it. You had to let Bucky guide you to it. He was it for you, you had to remember. He was your soulmate for a reason and you were getting through this together. As cliche it seemed, you walked with him into what felt like the unknown. 

***

The second you were outside the shared bedroom, Bucky couldn’t keep his hands off you. He was the perfect gentleman on the way back and even all through the compound but once the coast was clear, his hands were trailing up and down your sides, dipping scandalously low. You tried playfully shooing him away but then he’d reach under your dress and pinch the inside of your thigh and, well, after that, you were practically done for. 

You were absolutely amazed by how naturally you fell back into this rhythm with Bucky. You figured something had just been needed, some kind of push to get you back on track. Maybe this date had been that. You didn’t want to think too much anymore, though, so you followed Bucky as he walked you back into the bed. 

He was on top of you in a matter of minutes, lips locked fully with yours as his hands continued to roam. It was all happening fast. Very fast. Bucky was a skilled multitasker in more ways than one. As he was taking off his shirt, he was already working on getting your dress off. You paid little attention to any of it, trying to let yourself get lost in the movements and lovingness of your soulmate.  

Once your dress was discarded, long forgotten in the room with Bucky’s shirt, next came his pants and your bra. All while doing so, Bucky kept stealing kisses from all over your body. Your lips. Your neck. Your chest. Your stomach. He was like a starved man and maybe, in some way, he really was. Part of you had denied him from so much, including sex, after the…

Your eyes shot open. Your heart was suddenly pounding but not in the excited, horny kind of way. Not in anticipation for your soulmate’s touch. In fact, you wanted the exact opposite of that. You felt like you were suddenly suffocating. You became very aware of Bucky’s body on top of you, the weight of him holding you into the bed that was so soft you felt like you were sinking. 

Bucky was seemingly oblivious to all of this despite your breath becoming shallow and unsteady. You wiggled under his touch trying some way to get him off but he mistook it for pleasure and kept his teasing work around your panties. 

“Bucky-,”

“I know, doll,” he hummed, his lips back at your neck while his metal hand dipped a little into the waistband. You shook your head.

“No, Bucky, please-,” your voice was barely there as you tried to convey your nervousness. Your brain felt like it was cloudy. You didn’t know what to say, what to do, to get his attention. You gasped, overwhelmed.

Bucky pulled away from your neck immediately, brows furrowed in confusion at your sudden switch in emotion. He said your name, voice so full of concern, but he felt so far away.

You couldn’t find the words anymore so you just tried to push him off. While naturally impossible, he took the sign and quickly lifted himself off of you, going as far to leave the bed. He stood at the foot of it, watching you try to prop yourself up on your elbows. 

You were struggling to breathe still and trying so hard to get your brain focused on something other than the feeling of being held down. It didn’t make sense, though. It really didn’t. You hadn’t been held down like that but there was something about the logistics of it your brain couldn’t separate the actions. You couldn’t move, you were dominated once again. And then you suddenly remembered Bucky’s involvement and it all just… It was all just one giant fucking mess. Your hands were shaking. 

Bucky tried again, “Sweetheart, are you okay?”

Your eyes shot to him, realizing how wild you must look. You were having a panic attack in the middle of sex. How much more could your life be affected by those goddamn-

“Doll, please, breathe with me,” Bucky pleaded as he leaned down to your eye line. You sat up further and he took the chance to take your hands in his. He held them as they shook uncontrollably. You stared into his eyes, regaining some order in your breathing.

“I-I’m sorry-,”

Bucky shook his head. “No, don’t you dare apologize. It’s alright, I understand. Just focus on your breathing. There’s nothing bad here, sweetheart. Just me.”

You nodded slowly and closed your eyes, focusing on your heart which was finally settling down. You pushed away the thoughts. The images of being strapped down. The way you were tossed around like a ragdoll. The look Bucky wore as he killed those men-

You shifted your attention to the weight of Bucky’s hands in yours. They had done so much bad but were also doing you so much good. 

It was over. Everything you had endured was over. Those men were gone. That Bucky wasn’t really that Bucky. He was still your Bucky. The Bucky that walked you to work and cried over movies. You had to drill this into your brain before something else overtook you.

After a moment or so, you felt you could finally reopen your eyes. Bucky was still watching you intensely.

“B-Better?” He seemed nervous to ask.

“Yeah,” you said, finding your voice again. “Thank you, Bucky.”

He let out a small sniffle and that’s when you finally saw the tears forming in his eyes. You looked down at your connected hands, unable to bear seeing what you had caused. 

“Anytime, sweetheart,” Bucky whispered. “I’m here whenever you need me.”

You gave a small, shy nod. “Can we just go to bed now?”

Wordlessly, Bucky stood up and grabbed one of his shirts for you. While you threw it on, Bucky began unmaking the bed. Once he had set up your space with the blankets you cherished, you crawled right in and tried to let sleep take you.

It wasn’t very pleasant in your dream world as the memories of the kidnapping filled you, despite all your best attempts to suppress it. 

But you stood no chance escaping these because they weren’t your memories. They were from Bucky’s perspective. 

Unknowingly to him, you were seeing all the steps he had taken when it came to murdering the Hydra men. You felt the anger, the determination. The absolute disregard for them. You could practically feel it as his fist collided with them. As he drained their life from their bodies. 

You didn't want to react, though - God forbid you give Bucky another reason to worry -  and instead, you gave in to them.

#bucky barnes #the winter soldier #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes one shot #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes angst #light smut #bucky barnes smut #mcu #mcu fic #fanfic #fanfiction #soulmate au #marvel one shot #marvel fanfiction #marvel #angst #fluff

[peachyteabuck]

Hey lukis I hope its okay to ask I was wondering if you have any tips/advice for moving out for the very first time from living with your parents cause I've been working and saving up to move out on my own (cause I hate it here everyday istg) and im so happy now im old enough too I'm just lowkey so nervous to move out on my own because well it's all so new and all but I just really have to leave this home (hell) I'm stuck in

Like I just want my apartment and to be happier living there even if I'm alone because at least I'll be way happier than living with my own family who are well transphobic assholes and I just hate it here so much:(( it sucks.

full disclosure i am answering this on my floor because i don't want to go into another part of my apartment lol

biggest thing: i don't think you'll be living alone for a long while. at least in the U.S., living alone is expensive as hell, and landlords might raise standards for approving your apartment. plan on having roommate(s)

there are larger, more comprehensive lists but here's 10 things i wish someone told me before i moved out at 18:

1. adulting takes up way more time than everyone told you. trash & laundry & dishes accumulate quicker, something always needs to be cleaned.

2. everything costs so much fucking money. when you're moving out, you're started from SCRATCH. best advice is to not spend too much. ask around, people usually have extras of stuff they're willing to give away. also, dumpster diving/trash picking is usually worth it. it's where i got my tv AND tv stand. also local no buy groups on facebook

3. have copies of everything. birth certificate, social security card, any other necessary paperwork. keep originals in one place (ideally secure fireproof box), and keep copies in another place. this includes your leases, too.

4. you're going to need to relearn how to do things. did you know you can do dishes SITTING DOWN? or do laundry at the couch while watching tv? or buy a giant pack of paper plates to keep urself with because dishes are hard? i didn't.

5. set boundaries. & stick to them. i have an easy time expressing boundaries with others but the hardest time setting them for myself

6. make friends with people who are smarter than you. keeps you humble and they're the ones to make sure you're on the right track.

7. getting involved with stuff is the best way to make friends. this is easier if you're at school, but there's always stuff around cities and towns.

8. get a hobby you don't intend on monetizing. you do in fact need something to think about besides money

9. if you want a pet, keep at least $3,000 in an emergency fund. some people say $1,500 is ideal but honestly double it

10. daily walks are good for your health. sometimes you gotta put on a silly little podcast and walk aimlessly around your city and buy yourself a little treat from a grocery store with a cat for a manager. personally i'm listening to american scandal and love jarritos.

#all communique has been redacted for your safety; #anon #i could talk abt this forever full disclosure

[novelconcepts]

fic: walking with the lady

Every movie, every book, every story about the horrors of letting in the ghosts has prepared Dani for the constant state of alarm. The panic. The discomfort of the situation.

Not a single goddamn one told her how stupid it would be.

***

The first time Viola Lloyd rears her spectral head outside of a dream, Dani is doing her best to enjoy an incredibly pleasant spring morning. She’s been having strange thoughts--strange echoes of night terrors that have been escalating, images weaving as though shot from the depths of some great ocean--for a few months now. Has been trying her very best to take Jamie’s advice and not worry about it. One day at a time. Stop gazing into every reflective surface in the county and just...live. 

And she’s been doing that, she thinks, with a decent amount of peaceful abandon for a woman carrying an unknown beast in the depths of her psyche. She’s traveled. She’s seen much of America, and more of Jamie. She’s learned she’ll never get any better at tea, that she’s honestly not terrible at pasta, that she can talk the ear off old women who just want to stop and smell the flowers. It’s been a serene six, seven, eight years, if she lays them all end to end, and she’s glad of it. 

But the dreams are coming faster now. With more regularity. Long stretches of night fade into black and white, into memories she can feel with her whole body, but knows aren’t her own. Corsets and sweeping skirts, a sister she never had, a husband. A child. None of this belongs to Dani, so it must be her, mustn’t it? 

It scares her. She talks about it to Jamie when she wakes--sometimes in the morning, sometimes in the middle of the night; whether she’s truly awake or not, Jamie always listens. They always hunker back down, holding tight to one another, Jamie whispering into her hair that you’re still here, you’re still you, it’s all okay, Poppins. It helps, as much as anything’s going to. 

What doesn’t help is sitting here on this park bench, a list of shopping plans open in her lap, and hearing--hearing isn’t even the right word for it, it’s like a ringing voice coming up from the very back of her head--someone say, “And what on earth is that?”

Dani sits straight upright, every line of her body rigid with fear. “What...is what?”

She’s said the words out loud, she realizes when an elderly man with a basket of stale bread turns slowly to look at her. Her mouth twists itself into a rictus grin of apology, and he shuffles off, looking very much like a man prepared for his own murder at the hands of a lunatic schoolteacher. 

“Well,” the voice says, coolly amused. “That was embarrassing for us both.”

What, Dani thinks, the fuck is going on?

“What’s going on,” Viola Lloyd’s deep, accented voice says, “is truly beyond my knowledge. Do you know the last time I had this many thoughts of my own? Must have been...oh, three hundred years, now...”

Why, Dani thinks furiously, are you having them now?

“I certainly couldn't say.” Viola sounds astonished. “The last I recall, I was trying to reclaim my child--”

Flora, Dani interrupts with a rush of anger, was not your child. 

She imagines she can feel Viola’s hand flip to and fro, carelessly. “It’s all apples in the end, isn’t it?”

She’s clenching her fists in her lap, she realizes, as if there’s anything to fight. As if she could ward Viola off from inside her own body. 

“Oh,” Viola says coolly, “I wouldn’t worry just yet. I couldn’t say for sure--it’s all rather new, you must understand--but I don’t think I could do anything to you. Not yet. Look, here, I’ll try...”

Dani’s muscles strain against an invisible force that never comes. Viola chuckles. 

“See? Nothing. The lights are on, my dear, but none but you is really home.”

Then why are you awake? Dani demands. 

“Not a clue, darling. It’s nice, though, isn’t it? You really take it for granted in life.”

Take what for--

“Seeing,” Viola breathes. “I haven’t seen anything properly in centuries. I’d forgotten how bright the world was. How full of...color.”

Is it Dani’s imagination, or does Viola’s tone hold an edge of disgust on that final word?

“So, again, I find myself asking. What on earth do you call that?”

Dani allows instinct to turn her head, somehow sensing the direction Viola wishes for her to look. She finds herself staring at a young child playing at her mother’s feet. 

I--it’s... And it’s here, in this moment, faced with the nearly impossible task of explaining to the 400-year-old ghost woman who shares her body what a Slinky is for that Dani Clayton decides this whole cohabitation thing might have been a mistake. 

***

“Hang on,” Jamie says. “Hang on, she’s awake in there?”

Dani, folded nearly double on their couch with her face in her hands, nods. Her head is pounding. Viola has been, ah, what’s the polite way to put it? Running her mouth. For nearly four hours. 

“She’s got some...opinions,” Dani mumbles into her cupped hands. Jamie stops rubbing light circles into her back, curious. 

“About what?”

“Might be a shorter list, to ask what she doesn’t have an opinion about,” Dani says. At the back of her head, she feels Viola cross her arms. 

“This sounds like you are on the path to impudence, Miss Clayton.”

“But hang on, I thought--” Jamie seems to be choosing her words carefully. “I thought she was just sort of...in there. Tucked away, like the kids said. What do you mean she can see?”

Dani blows out a long breath, wishing dearly for a cigarette. “I don’t know, Jamie, I’m not the authority on carrying Victorian women around in my skull.”

“Bit nearer to it than me, Poppins.” Jamie’s smiling, plainly trying to make her feel better. Dani turns to glower at her. 

“I love you very much. Please don’t test me right now. She hasn’t stopped talking for more than twenty minutes all afternoon.”

Jamie raises her hands in surrender. “Can she...can she see me now?”

“Tell her,” Viola says. “Tell her I can see her, and her mannishly-inappropriate hairstyle.”

“I will not be saying that,” Dani mutters. Jamie raises an eyebrow. 

“Are you having a conversation now? What’s she saying?”

“Please let her know I find her insistence upon men’s trousers silly at best, her blouses are entirely too loose, and I am bewildered by the wealth of ankle she seems to find appropriate in mixed company--”

“She says you have a nice smile,” Dani says. Jamie’s eyebrows raise to her hairline. Viola makes a horrible little noise of revulsion.

“How dare you place words in my mouth!”

“You are absolutely not telling me the truth, are you?” Jamie says in the same moment. Dani groans.

“Aspirin. I am going to need so much aspirin.”

***

It’s not all the time, thankfully; Dani thinks she’d go mad if Viola were truly there at all hours, yammering away about silks and petticoats and the good old days when a person could just drop dead of the plague with no notice. Sometimes, Viola even goes days at a stretch without saying a word, as though she’s sunk back to sleep in whatever little corner of Dani’s mind she calls a bedroom. 

And then, like a thunderstorm, she emerges once more. Usually with something snappy and irritating to share with Dani.

“Are we really wearing that?”

“There is no we, Viola,” Dani grumbles. She’s in the process of trying to choose between a flower-patterned dress and a denim vest, unable to gauge what kind of day it’s going to be when she steps out of the closet and into the chaos. Business has been booming down at The Leafling, which is wonderful, but more than a little overwhelming. And Jamie, god love her, has taken to watching Dani when she thinks Dani won’t notice, always with this worried little crease between her eyes. 

It’s making her crazy, if she’s honest about it. Jamie isn’t the worrier in the relationship, and watching her slip into the role is making Dani feel worse about the whole situation. She needs Jamie to tell her it’s all fine, it’s all perfectly all right, they’re going to make it through this new weirdness together no problem. 

“My dear, we became a we the night you said the magic words,” Viola says, a bit pettily. “Or have you forgotten me already?”

“How,” Dani grits out, “on earth am I supposed to forget you? Feel like I spend every day just...waiting for you to spring up and ask some idiotic question about cars or airplanes or deodorant--”

“For a schoolteacher, you surely lack for patience, Miss Clayton.”

Dani closes her eyes, searching for strength. Her hands grope, landing on dress and vest and yanking them free. “You know what? Both. We’re doing both today.”

“We most certainly are not! Not even a glove to be found? And again with the florals! We’ve been over how tacky the florals are, Miss Clayton. Miss Clayton, are you listening?”

“No,” Dani says decisively, wriggling into the layers and looking around for her chunkiest pair of earrings. 

“You are the scandal of the town, Miss Clayton,” Viola sniffs.

***

“Does she, ah...watch when we do this?”

Dani groans. They’d been having such a nice evening--an old movie fading slowly into wandering hands, Jamie’s mouth making its way down her neck, Jamie’s fingers slipping beneath the hem of her shirt and tickling her ribs. She’d just flipped Jamie onto her back, was just looking to remove the deeply inconvenient articles of cloth between them, when Jamie pressed a palm lightly against her chest. 

“Not trying to be weird about it,” Jamie says, breathless. Her eyes are dark and heavy; though she’s stopped Dani moving closer, one of her legs has wound around Dani’s hip, easing her in. It’s giving Dani the worst kind of mixed message, to say the least. 

“Would you like us to put this sort of thing on hold until I find a way to exorcise the demon from my head, Jamie?”

“I did not say that. I decidedly said nothing of the kind.”

Dani lets her head fall forward, covering Jamie’s face in a fall of blonde. “Sorry. That was snippy. I just...I don’t know the answer. She’s...” She tilts her head, eyes shut, searching. “Quiet. For now.”

Jamie brushes her hair back, cups the side of her face, thumb moving in a slow arc across her cheekbone. “S’all right then. Can’t blame me being curious, can you? I mean, it’s not every day you find a third party sneaks into your bed.”

Dani leans into the soft stroke of her hand, sighing. “I don’t like it, either, you know. She’s so...judgey. I hadn’t realized ghosts could be judgey.”

“What’s she judging?” The hand on her chest slides, gripping a fistful of her shirt, pulling her toward Jamie. Dani sighs again, letting Jamie kiss her with the soft determination of someone apologizing for stopping this train in the first place. 

“Me,” she murmurs against Jamie’s lips. “You.”

“Me?” Jamie sounds affronted. “What’s there to judge about me, I’m a bloody peach.”

Dani laughs, bites her lower lip until Jamie groans. “It’s not anything personal. It’s just...the whole world is so different from what she remembers. There’s TV, jean shorts, women out there having jobs and lives without consent of their husbands...for her, it must be the Wild West.”

“Judges what she doesn’t understand, is that it?” Jamie is doing an admirable job of pretending to still be invested in this conversation, even as her hands are making short work of Dani’s sweatpants. Dani sucks in a breath. 

“I guess. Yeah. Can’t blame her for that, really.”

Jamie mulls this over, fingers tracing hipbone. Her nails bite gently into soft skin. “Does she judge us for this, I wonder?”

“Do you care?”

“Not,” Jamie says, twisting her hand and bringing their mouths together hard, “in the least.”

***

“Put it out the window.”

“I am not putting it out the window, Viola.”

“Down a flight of stairs, then! What in all cosmic reaches of hell is this for, if not throwing it somewhere it can never harm another soul again!”

Dani exhales through her nose, slowly, embracing every meditative memory of dealing with errant children. “I am not,” she says slowly to the empty apartment, ���going to throw my television anywhere. And I'd really appreciate it if you’d stop making that suggestion every time I turn it on.”

“You are letting your soul rot from the inside out with this filth!” Viola is all but shrieking. Dani imagines her pacing back and forth, back and forth, her hands wild. “Your moral fiber, Miss Clayton. What of your moral fiber?”

“If MTV rots away one’s moral fiber,” Dani says, as calmly as she knows how, “then I suspect we’re all lost causes, anyway.”

Viola is silent for such a long time, Dani thinks she’s done the trick. She turns her attention back to the laundry she’s been folding to the tune of Janet Jackson. Her head bobs gently in time as the videos shuffle past--Madonna, Michael, Paula, George. Then, with the hour change, newer fare. She’s still getting around to some of these artists, still trying to work out how she feels about them. 

"Did you hear that?” Viola seethes. “What was that about an anaconda? Is this man suggesting we feed a woman to snakes? What barbarism do your people accept in this age?”

Dani folds a pair of Jamie’s socks with such deliberate care, she nearly forgets to breathe while doing it. 

“Moral fiber,” Viola hisses. “Moral fiber is wasted on this age of nudity and...and...hammertime.”

Dani finds herself desperately invested in ironing the wrinkles out of a pair of jeans with her hand until Viola goes quiet again.

***

“You could have such nice hair,” Viola croons. “Such nice hair, if you would only put them away...”

“They’re convenient,” Dani says, scraping her hair back into a pink scrunchie. Viola makes a noise of disgust. 

“They’re abhorrent. Honestly, your time and its...fashions. What do you call this?”

She’s gesturing toward the bathroom counter, to the little basket that holds all the hair supplies. Dani sighs. 

“It’s a headband, Viola. We like headbands. They keep the hair out of our eyes.”

“There are other ways. Fine hats. Lovely veils. Why don’t you own any lovely veils, Dani, do you want the common folk seeing your every decision in your eyes?”

Dani reaches for the hairspray. Behind her, Jamie bustles in with shirt half-buttoned, suspenders swinging around her thighs. Viola makes another catty little noise. 

“Any news?” Jamie asks, reaching around for a hairbrush and kissing Dani’s cheek. 

“She doesn’t like scrunchies,” Dani reports. “And she’s started calling me Dani.”

Jamie frowns. “Good sign or bad?”

“Impossible to guess.”

“Tell her you want some veils,” Viola says sweetly. “And for her to learn the value of a fine skirt.”

Dani, ignoring this, reaches around the back of Jamie’s neck and pulls her into a searing kiss. Jamie drops the hairbrush with a clatter, leaning Dani back against the counter and gripping the small of her back like she’s suddenly forgotten they’re both late for work. 

When they break apart, they’re both flushed, Dani giggling into the underside of Jamie’s jaw, Jamie’s eyes glazed. In the back of her mind, she hears Viola sigh. 

“That is truly childish, you know.”

***

It’s kind of an accidental habit, punishing her inner ghost for bad behavior by channeling her frustrations into sex. She couldn’t explain it if she tried, except to say Viola does tend to shut up when Dani’s properly distracted. Maybe it’s just the way the connection works, thinner when Dani isn’t willing to give it energy. Maybe Viola’s embarrassed. Either way, a year after Viola first speaks, her life with Jamie burns hotter than it ever has. 

It’s best when Viola is trying to run her mouth over Jamie’s fashion sense, she’s noticed. It is, in fact, the only way to shut Viola up about the aforementioned fashion sense. Which Dani intellectually understands; coming up from a world 400 years away, where women dressed in endless layers and a person’s value was often found in the shine of her jewels and the rich fabric of her skirts, slamming face-first into the 1990s must have been a trip. Truly, Viola is lucky Dani didn’t cart her out of that lake earlier. If she thinks scrunchies are bad, she should have seen the heyday of shoulder pads. 

Honestly, though, the worst thing is listening to Viola trill on about how much better Jamie could look if she’d only bow to the whims of femininity. Jamie, whose primary word on fashion has always been “can I dig a hole in this?” is perfect just the way she is. In fact, as the years go on and her jeans grow cuffs, her shorts grow shorter, her tops crop midway up her stomach, Dani thinks the world is finally suiting Jamie instead of the other way around. 

“She’s prancing around for the world to see--”

“It’s ninety-six degrees out,” Dani says in a low voice. She understands these conversations with Viola can be internalized, but she tends to wind up wearing this distant expression every time, and Jamie can spot it a mile off. Best to just mutter aloud in the sanctity of their own home. 

“She’s walking her wares up and down the block,” Viola rages on. “Not a shawl to be seen!”

“Jamie,” Dani calls from the kitchen, “have you ever in your life worn a shawl?”

“That’s, uh, one of those blankets with the fringy bits, yeah?” Jamie calls back. She’s bent over the air conditioning unit, trying to coax life into the old girl. The cropped line of her black t-shirt rides up her back, revealing glistening skin. Dani tips her head to enjoy the view. “I’ll pass on account of any blanket in this heat being like to kill me.”

“Best not to test it,” Dani agrees. Viola heaves the longest-suffering sigh Dani’s ever heard. 

“It doesn’t bother you in the least, your woman out there, where anyone could see her...her bare stomach!”

“One,” Dani says coolly, “she’s my girlfriend, not my woman. Two, I’ve never once tried to dictate her clothing, and I’m not stopping because a dead woman insists. Three, I happen to like it.”

“Like what?” Jamie strolls back to her, pushing sweaty hair off her forehead with a sigh. She stops a few inches away, rocking back and forth on her heels like she wants nothing more than to close the distance despite the mind-numbing heat. 

“Viola is commenting upon your more risqué clothing choices.”

“What? This?” Jamie grasps the exceedingly high-cut hem of her shirt and tugs it gently upward, teasing. “What’s her problem with all this?”

“It’s on display, evidently.”

“As it should be,” Jamie says almost primly. “I’m a fine specimen to behold. Learn to enjoy it, love, it’ll be faster than trying to change the view.”

This last, she says in a slightly louder voice, as though speaking to the shadow behind Dani’s eyes. She’s grinning, and Dani has time to think how strange it is, how quickly they’ve learned to accommodate Viola’s appearances into their conversations--Jamie has taken to leaving beats between her sentences, allowing for Dani to process two people speaking at once--before Jamie is wrapping both arms around her and lifting her off the floor. She squeals in surprise, delight turning to desire as Jamie licks a bead of sweat from her neck. 

“Not again,” Viola sighs. “You’ll wake the whole village.”

“Apartment,” Dani corrects, catching Jamie by the jaw and kissing her hungrily. It’s too hot for this, probably, but she can’t quite remember how to care when Jamie pulls free of her grasp and slides to her knees, taking Dani’s skirt with her. 

“It’s a nightmare, regardless.”

***

Eventually, Viola proves herself capable of learning a thing or two. Namely, that she is welcome to run commentary on anyone in the world except for Jamie. 

Even old ghosts can learn new tricks, apparently, although it takes a number of months, a great deal of sex, and one memorable weekend in which--upon Viola raging over every article in Jamie’s side of the closet for half an hour--Dani simply removed the option of clothing from Viola’s sight altogether. 

“This,” Jamie panted, both of them on the floor with a sheet draped over their tangled limbs, “is working for me in the weirdest way, Poppins.”

“I think she’s really starting to hate me,” Dani said conversationally, even as her fingers slipped between Jamie’s legs yet again. Jamie’s hips rose to meet her, one hand burying itself in her hair. 

“Well, that makes one of us, doesn’t it?”

***

Not commenting on Jamie, naturally, does nothing to stop Viola talking about every other goddamn thing in the world. 

“We’re going to have to have a long talk about not shaming women for their bodies, you know,” Dani tells her one afternoon. Viola has been tearing a young woman to pieces over her short skirt, furious that someone so pristine could soil herself with such impunity. Dani must be getting used to this in the weirdest way possible, because this kind of floral language is starting to feel second-nature. 

“I would never shame anyone,” Viola protests. “I am simply stating fact. Men do not value women as it is, and while we may win their games, we get nowhere at all if we do not play them.”

“This isn’t a game, Viola, it’s her life. Her body. She can do whatever she likes with it.”

“But I want her to succeed,” Viola insists. There’s an almost disconcerting eagerness to the words. She really truly believes what she’s saying. “A woman viewed as nothing more than a strumpet will have an even more difficult time securing a dowry, and then where will she be?”

“In college?” Dani suggests blithely. “Traveling? Living isn’t just for men, Viola, I know you know this. You refused the oath of obedience on your wedding day.”

“Of course it’s not for men’s sake alone, but when the law--”

“The law is different here,” Dani says, almost gently. “Has been for a long time. Or haven’t you noticed how well Jamie and I get along without a man to be found?”

Viola’s silence stretches so long, Dani’s sure she’s either gone back to sleep or is finally choosing this moment to let the ugly banner of homophobia unfurl. She’s been waiting for this moment for years, it seems, waiting for the ghost in her head to mimic her mother on the one and only occasion she attempted to send home a letter. 

“You’re different,” Viola says at last, very softly. Dani blinks. 

“Pardon?”

“You’re different,” Viola repeats. “Jamie is your forever. Does that young girl have her forever, Miss Clayton?”

“Well--I don't know, I don’t suppose it’s my business--”

“Perhaps she will find it in one like our Jamie,” Viola says impatiently. “But perhaps she will find instead the stones of men who have not, over four centuries, really changed all that much. Is it so wrong of me, to have a mother’s care for that?”

Dani doesn’t know how to answer. Doesn’t have the first idea, when faced with a Viola who is not simply catty for cattiness’ sake, but genuine. She opens and closes her mouth a few times, unable to find argument. 

“We just. We just don’t pick on girls for what they do with their bodies, all right? It’s...it’s cruel, and it isn’t necessary.”

Viola sighs. “Fine. But we still ought to discuss the pattern choices. Those polka dots are not flattering in the least.”

It’s only later, watching Jamie chop carrots for dinner, that Dani realizes Viola had said our. Our Jamie. 

“Oh sweet Christ,” she mumbles.

***

The change is slow. Subtle. If not for the fact of carrying this woman in her head, Dani’s not sure she even would have noticed. 

“She what?” Jamie looks up from the plant she’s tending, fingernails grimed with soil, wedding ring carefully strung upon a thick chain around her neck until she can clean up again. “She...sorry, what?”

“I can’t be sure,” Dani muses. “It sounds...crazy. But I think she’s starting to like you.”

“Well, sure,” Jamie laughs. “I’m a deeply likable human being. But this is the Lady, yeah? Same one who dragged Peter fucking Quint to his death? Same one who thinks I show too much skin?”

“I’m...not convinced she thinks that anymore.” It’s really hard to say for sure. On the one hand, it’s possible Viola has shut up about Jamie’s shorn sleeves and shorts because every time she mentioned either, Dani made it her personal life’s mission to make sure Jamie never wore anything else around the house. On the other...

“I think she looked at your butt the other day.”

Jamie raises her eyes slowly, brow furrowing. “Can she do that? Turn your eyes to something you weren’t already looking at?”

“No,” Dani says, a bit stiffly, all too aware of stepping into the trap. Jamie grins. 

“Thought not.”

“But it was different,” Dani presses on through flushing cheeks. “I mean--even if I was already looking, she was--I mean--she--”

She doesn’t know how to explain it. How the rumble in her chest, already so familiar at the sight of Jamie puttering around their home, had seemed to expand until it encompassed all of her. How it was like someone had turned the heat in the room to its breaking point. 

“I can just tell, okay?” she says, aggrieved. “She looked at your butt, and she liked it.”

Jamie makes a thoughtful face, brushing dirt off her hands with slow, deliberate motions. “So...what you’re saying is...your personal ghostie has a crush on your wife?”

Dani presses her face against the counter, letting the cool metal relieve her blush. “Shit. Yeah. I think she might.”

“This is,” Jamie says triumphantly, pressing up against Dani from behind and kissing the back of her neck, “the funniest thing that has ever happened, by a country goddamn mile.”

***

A series of events, cascading in short order, that Dani almost actually feels bad about. If one could feel guilty about putting strain on one’s personal-pan Casper. 

The Britney Spears video, for one. Viola still does not like music videos--or music, frankly, unless it involves a ridiculous number of flutes and orchestral swells--but she’s grown to tolerate them. Mostly. 

That is, until Britney sways onscreen in a plaid skirt and schoolgirl pigtails. 

“Fuck,” Dani gasps, hand coming down hard against her own breastbone. It’s like someone grabbed the dial on her blood pressure and cranked it all the way up. That someone, she suspects, being the dead woman who has been more and more present of late. 

“I--I cannot--I simply am not capable of understanding--” Viola sounds like she’s short-circuiting. “I know we are not meant to comment, but what on earth is she doing?!”

“Dancing,” Dani says sharply, trying to coax her breathing back down. Is this what a stroke feels like? Is her fucking ghost roommate giving her an actual stroke? “Viola, you’ve seen dancing.”

“She is so young! She is a child! Who is protecting this person from the world?” Viola is furious. Viola is exploding. Dani sort of wonders if her chest is going to explode, too. 

“She’s...a pop star. This is what they get paid lots and lots of money to do.” It’s a bad answer, she knows. These videos make her a little uncomfortable too, when she thinks on them too long. But Viola? Viola’s rage is a towering beast of a thing. For a minute, lungs scraping at the air, Dani is genuinely afraid this is the point where the switch flips. Where she finds herself staring at the room from the back of her own head. 

“Someone,” Viola says in a low, terrible voice, “must protect these children.”

It takes almost an hour to calm her down. Dani doesn’t turn MTV back on for a while after that. 

***

“The. The moon?” The opposite end of the emotional spectrum this time. If Viola had been nearly apoplectic over Britney’s choreography, she now sounds faint.

“You should have floated that a bit more softly,” Dani tells Jamie, who looks confused. 

“Float what, all I did was mention NASA--”

“The moon,” Viola repeats. “We have seen. The moon.”

“She’s having trouble with the moon landing,” Dani says. Jamie waves her hands helplessly.

“Poppins, I have trouble understanding the geography of Texas, we all have problems.”

“We have,” Viola breathes, “stepped foot. Upon. The moon.”

Dani pours herself another large glass of wine.

***

“How’s this, then?” Jamie gives a very small, somewhat self-conscious twirl. “Too much? Too little? Too, ah, revealing, as the ghost contingent might say?”

Dani, leaning against the bedroom wall, can’t quite find the words. Viola, too, is conspicuously silent. 

“It’s bad,” Jamie says, nodding fervently. “Yeah, y’know, I think I knew it when I picked it up. Better on the sales rack, as they say. I can just...if you wouldn’t mind popping the zip real quick...”

“Yes, Dani,” Viola says quietly. “Pop the zip.”

“You don’t even know what that means,” Dani hisses. Jamie raises an eyebrow.

“What’s that?”

“It’s not bad,” Dani says quickly, ignoring the little harrumph Viola utters. “It’s very not bad. Opposite of bad, really.”

Relief floods Jamie’s face. The dress is low cut in a way very little of her clean-up clothes are, with a slit running clear up the leg. Patterned in burgundy petals, the black velvet is stark against her pale skin. 

“I won’t get run out of the convention, then? Only they said there’s a bit about drinks and networking, and it was just shy of black-tie. I could do that instead. Get a black tie. Think I’d look nice in a black tie.”

“The dress,” Viola says in a low, conspiratorial voice. “Tell her it is a nice dress.”

“It’s a nice dress,” Dani repeats with comic dazedness. “Best dress I’ve ever seen, maybe.”

“And now,” Viola says soothingly, “you go to her. Walk confidently now, shoulders back, chin up--”

“Are you...wing-man-ing me toward my own wife?” 

“Seduction requires confidence, Dani.”

“What’s she saying?” Jamie’s face has gone a curious mix of apprehensive and amused. Dani swallows. 

“Seduction requires confidence, evidently.” 

A slow grin spreads across Jamie’s face. Dani raises a hand, finger extended. 

“Don’t. Don’t make that smug face.”

“What’s smug about it?” She’s moving across the room, arms already reaching. “This is my very natural expression, I’ll have you know. The most normal expression in the world for a woman whose wife is being told to undress her by the ancient rage-ghost sharing her body.”

“Our lives,” Dani says helplessly, already pressing herself flush against Jamie, “are different than other people’s lives.”

“Yes,” Jamie agrees in a low voice, sliding the sweater over Dani’s head. “Can’t find it in me to complain, though, can you?”

***

It’s weird, almost. Weirder, that it’s almost not. That the beast in the jungle, the creature Dani spent nearly a decade dreading, has pounced at last and...mostly, she just seems to want to see Dani happy. 

Jamie finds it hilarious, in that pretend-callous way Jamie has of smoothing over genuine concern with soft laughter. She doesn’t like Dani sharing her mental space with someone at all hours, Viola popping up like a wack-a-mole game on high. But, if Dani must share the space with anyone, at least--

“It’s someone who thinks I'm gorgeous.”

“You are gorgeous,” Dani replies, a bit exasperated. “Gorgeous, silly, perfect person. But my inner ghost has a crush on you, that isn’t strange for you?”

“Poppins, my life has been strange since a doe-eyed American strolled into it and told me she still saw her dead fiancé when we kissed.” Jamie reclines on the bed in a sleep shirt and underwear, hands playing lightly with the pillowcase beneath her head. “Strange is my bread and butter these days, and if I had to sacrifice you to have it any other way, we both know how it would go.”

Dani makes a mulish sound under her breath. Jamie cups a hand to her ear. 

“Say again?”

“It’s weird,” she repeats, arms crossed over her chest. “She’s weird. I always thought she’d do something bad--walk me off a roof, or strangle someone to death, or try to rob a convenience store. But mostly she just wants to protect young girls from an uncaring world and look at your butt in the shower.”

“That is...very specific,” Jamie says lightly. Dani shakes her head. 

“It’s so bizarre. The longer this goes on, the more she sees of the world, it’s like...like she’s getting more real. More Viola, less Lady.”

Jamie sits up, hand sliding to rest high on Dani’s thigh as if to shield her from harm. “But not more solid, right? Not taking up space you already rent?”

Dani shakes her head. “That’s the thing. She doesn't feel like she’s taking over. And it feels...like she should.”

“You want her to?” 

“No, no, of course not.” Dani raises Jamie’s knuckles to her lips, raining soft kisses up and down her hand until the tension goes out of her brow. “I just don’t understand what’s happening. This isn’t...what I expected.”

Jamie exhales, shifting her weight until she’s sitting in Dani’s lap. She takes a Dani’s face between her hands, kisses her long and slow until Dani eases back against the headboard. 

“This is good, Poppins. You’re a good influence. You were on those kids, and on me, and now on this Lady of yours. Maybe that’s all a ghost needs, deep down.”

Dani leans into her, lets the rhythm of kiss and gentle bite and hands slipping beneath her clothes carry her away for a while. Still, no Viola, and she’s grateful. She doesn’t like to think how that would feel, Viola popping up while Jamie’s curling her fingers deep, groaning soft against her shoulder. There is a time and a place for hauntings, and time with Jamie is something else entirely. 

She’s pretty sure Viola even respects that. Which is, like everything else, incredibly strange. 

***

Viola attends their second wedding. Their real wedding. It’s bizarre on a level Dani isn’t prepared to deal with, feeling her surface as the plans become reality. Jamie’s got flowers, naturally, and Owen’s catering, and Henry has the kids--who are kids no longer, but fully-formed people with lives of their own--running errands on the day. And Dani...

Dani is looking at herself in a wedding dress for the second time in her life, only this time, she can breathe. 

“You are radiant,” Viola says. Dani closes her eyes for a moment, steels herself. 

“Nothing else to say? No notes?”

“You chose wisely,” Viola says. Dani sighs. 

“I figured lace was classic, and someone told me I had nice shoulders once, so--”

“The dress is beautiful,” Viola says. “But I was not talking about your grooming for the day.”

Dani gives a shaky laugh. “I love her, you know. I really do.”

“I can tell.” A beat of silence. Then: “I did not understand at first. Her. Or you. I suppose I will never understand completely. But...I understand the depths of what you feel. It is a part of me, too, I think. That devotion, sinking into all the spaces where I had forgotten.”

“You’re in love with Jamie, too?” Dani asks, not really wanting the answer. Viola laughs. 

“Yes. And no. You and I are intertwined, Miss Clayton. What you feel, I feel, to a degree. More importantly, I have seen your life with her. The life you build with the reckless joy of two people doomed one day to die.”

“Thanks,” Dani says, a bit sharply. She senses Viola putting her hands up, a terribly-modern gesture of surrender. 

“You understand what I mean. It takes courage, to love this completely. To do so while carrying a burden neither of us can truly comprehend is...something else altogether. There is a strength there I could not have understood on my most willful of days.”

“You turned Death away at your own doorstep,” Dani points out, smiling. Viola is pleased. 

“I did, didn’t I? And I could never regret it, even now. But you. You are doing something so much more incredible. Loving, even knowing what ending love must craft.”

“This is a bit dark for my wedding day,” Dani points out. Viola nods. 

“You are radiant. And you are fortunate. And I wish you both all the happiness in the world.”

It is the strangest wedding toast she’s ever heard, and something within Dani’s heart has never been more at peace.

***

“How’s our Lady doing tonight?” Jamie asks as Dani slips into bed beside her. She tips her head, thinking on it. Viola, as she usually is once Dani crosses the bedroom threshold, is nowhere to be found. 

“Good, I think. Calm.”

“And my wife?” Jamie looks at her, eyes serious. “You’ve been quieter lately. Fighting her less?”

“She’s been fighting me less,” Dani says. “She...likes it here, I think. Likes us. You know, I thought after this much time, she’d get bored or restless or...go back to her old ways, but...”

“But I’m just too gorgeous,” Jamie teases. Dani slings a leg across her body, holds tight to her with hands that never feel as though they can hold on hard enough. 

“I think sometimes...sometimes it’s just about remembering. What it’s like to be a person. What it’s like to be in love.”

“Mm,” Jamie agrees, fingertips drawing dizzying spirals on the bare back of Dani’s shoulder. “Well done, you. You’ve tamed your beast.”

Dani sighs, content. “I think it was a joint effort.”

“Yes,” Jamie agrees, kissing the top of her head. “Because I am, famously, too gorgeous to deny.”

#the haunting of bly manor #the haunting of bly manor spoilers #fanfiction #dani x jamie #jamie x dani #me: I'm gonna take this show incredibly seriously and analyze it in detail #also me: wouldn't it be fucking hilarious if viola just rode around in Dani's mind yapping all the time? #also also me: oh no it went from being stupid to having heart anyway what the hell #anyway this is all karatam's fault and she knows it #and like everything else it isn't as silly as it could be because my dumb heart got in the way