#these two make me go feral i stg

[osteomoth]

aha tw for blood but drawing of mine & @holyghoulbatz 's slasher ocs!!! mischief (they/them) on the left belongs to batz & crybaby (he/they) on the right belongs to me :]

#tw: blood #my art #art #artist on tumblr #slasher ocs #slashers #blood #these two make me go feral i stg #mothocs #ocs #oc art

[tomriddlehyperfixataion]

Tom Riddle x reader - The bet.

Modernish? Au? one of those -son of Voldemort Tom's that has Mattheo as a brother n stuffs like that-none of thats important to the fic i just wanted to put that up so them having phones makes sense, also they have charmed phones so they work within hogwarts. :p

starts off with texts messages --(two dashes) with italics for (y/n) and -(one dash) and bold for Tom.

=

It was a stupid bet, one that Tom was already regretting even thought it hadn't started yet. it all started with his girlfriend (y/n) being cheeky while she was supposed to be in class and asking for a bloody abs picture from him while he was trying to study.

--hey tommy~?

Tom didn't know why he didn't put on the 'do not disturb' feature on when he was studying, because (y/n) always bugged him when he studied. he picked up his phone that had vibrated when he got a text and saw what his girlfriend texted him, he quickly sent a reply back and then set his phone back down.

-What is it this time (y/n)? -Did you get detention, again? -I'm not getting you out of it this time.

(y/n) replied quickly, which told Tom she wasnt paying attention at all while she was supposed to be in charms class.

--nooo that was one time tommy --okay maybe two times --okay three....five times --whatevs thats not what im texting u for --do you think you could to me a favors? ill return it?

Now Tom was, slightly(emphasis on slightly) intrigued, sighing as he picked his phone back up after reading the texts as they came in and messing (y/n) back.

-What is it (y/n)?

(y/n) replied almost instantly, which made Tom annoyed because merlin's beard she was in class!!

--ab pic? plssss???

-...Are you actually serious?? Did you just text me to ask me for an ab picture?

--yes. pls? ill send something back? pls? pls pls pls? all the other girls get ab pics from their boys? and you've got a baaaady bb~

-No.

--plsss?

-(y/n) I'm busy.

--does that mean 'im busy so ill send one later' orrrrr

-(y/n).

--Tommy.

Tom sighed, setting his phone down, willing himself back to studying, but curiosity had him picking his phone back up and typing a response.

-Why do you even want an ab pic?

--cuz

-That's not an answer (y/n).

--plllllllls tommy? ill send you something back i stg

Tom's interest was once again piqued, his brow raising. she would...send something back?

-And I'm supposed to take your word for that?

-bet

Tom scrambled to catch his phone when another message was sent from his girlfriend, except it wasn't a text, it was a photo. Of her in nothing but his jumper, sitting in front of mirror, the jumper pulled up above her chest to show off her body that got him feeling feral, her face just barely obscured in the photo-but he could see her tantalizing smirk that always had him going nuts.

He quickly got a handle on his phone and texted (y/n) back with a clench in his jaw.

-CHRIST (y/n)!!! -You're in class!!!

--and you, aren't~! --enjoy bb~ now about that ab pic?

He was blushing for sure, his face hot and red and he felt his trousers get tight. He shuffled in his seat, running his hand through his hair. He thought about it for a hot moment before he groaned and stood up, going into his bathroom and turning the light on.

He texted (y/n) one last time before pulling his button-up off and snapping a picture of his upper body. He wasn't really built like Draco or his brother Mattheo was, he wasn't a quidditch player, but he did have defined muscles and (y/n) liked them, so that was fine.

-ffs fine. -photo sent.

-Happy?

--👀👀🥵😍💞🥰👌👌👌👌👌👌

Tom let out a soft snort, leaning against the wall of his bathroom, holding his shirt in his hand as he looked down at (y/n)'s message. Yep, she was happy. he looked back at the photo she had sent him and swallowed, the flush in his face returning as a spark went down his spine, looking at the way her chest was pushed out, her breasts soft and round and such a perfect size for him. her thighs looked bloody gorgeous as well, he wanted to sink his teeth into them again, seeing in the picture some of his previous marks on her skin.

"Fuck," Tom muttered, his head hitting the wall as he closed his eyes and tipped his head back, his hand falling to smack against his thigh. This girl was going to be the death of him.

he got another message and if he wasn't already flustered, he sure was now because he pulled his phone up so quick. yeah-(y/n) was going to be the death of him.

--thnk u bb~ i can just imagine ur face rn, all red n flustered~ --🥰😂

Tom huffed, rolling his eyes, throwing his shirt onto the sink counter and messaging his girlfriend back(honestly how he had even gotten one was a mystery to not just him, but to all his little 'friend' group.)

-You're a menace. -Your imagination does too many favors for you.

i mean, she was right-his face was all flushed and he definitely was flustered, plus he had a bloody hard on thanks to that hoodie picture; but did she need to know that? Nope.

--oh LOADS --like imagining what you would sound like whimpering for me --thats always a good daydream for me 😈🥵🤪

Tom flushed again, puffing his cheeks too. Whimper? Him? Never.

-I Don't whimper. Not for anyone. -Not even you.

Tom huffed through his nose, his cheeks flushing still as his own imagination began to wander off. but he was brought back to reality when he got another message from (y/n).

--wanna bet? 😈

Oh Fuck.

"Fuck," Tom muttered under his breath, ignoring the way his fingers twitched for a moment as he thought of a response. She was riling up intentionally, he knew that, she wanted to see what he would do-how he would respond to her challenge.

-Menace.

--scared Riddle?

-Don't do the fucking 'scared potter' thing on me.

--its working isnt it? i know how you tick bb~ ur just scared i'll make u whimper and i'll make you lose control~

-Shut the fuck up.

--oh swearing now are we? you are flustered

He was, his face was red now and his leg was bouncing, somehow even harder imagining (y/n) doing her absolute best to make him whimper.

--so --wanna bet?

Tom took a long deep breath, running his hand through his hand and then down his face. would he regret this? probably.

Fuck it.

-fine. you're on. what do you wanna bet?

he could feel the feral grin through the phone screen.

--i get five minutes to try and make you whimper, i can do whatever i need to do, if you dont whimper-moaning and other shit you usually do is fine im not cruel bb-in those five minutes you cannnnnn, idk, do whatever you want to me?

Now that was enticing.

-What do you get if you do make me whimper? Which wont happen of course.

--you gotta be REALLY vocal next time we do it. i wanna hear allll the sounds you can make, whimpers, moans, grunts, ANYTHING.

Tom flushed, really? All she wanted was for him to be a bit more...vocal during sex? weirdo.

-Weirdo.

--im UR weirdo.

Damn straight. Tom thought about it for a long moment and then groaned. Ffffine. fucking fine.

-Fine. Bet.

--BET!

Tom let out a long sigh, checking the time. it was still another half hour before (y/n) was done with classes for the day, but he suspected she was going to be heading straight to him as soon as she was done-when she was all excited like this-she wouldn't let go of her 'mission' until she got it done.

And this time-her mission was making him whimper. Well, he would make sure she wouldn't hear a single peep out of him this time.

He put his shirt back on and tucked it back into his pants, sighing when he saw he still had a hard on and simply ignored it, going back to his desk and going back to studying-he needed to get this done before (y/n) relentlessly distracted him later.

His timer went off exactly 30 minutes later and he sighed, pushing away from his desk, setting down his quill. Right on the dot-he got a text from (y/n) and he glanced at it with flushed ears.

--omw.

Yep. He knew it. He began mentally preparing himself for whatever sensual onslaught (y/n) had planned for him, crossing his leg over the other as stared at his almost finished essay, before he could think too much on it-the door to his room opened and in stepped in his girlfriend, looking positively giddy.

Oh boy, he was in trouble.

He stared at her as she locked the door behind her and walked right over to him, huffing a bit when she swung her leg over his lap and sat right down, her arms resting over his shoulder as she leaned in close, grinning like a cat that caught her prey.

"Ready to whimper for me baby?" (y/n) cooed and Tom rolled his eyes, uncrossing his arms and resting his hand's on her thighs.

"You wont hear a thing," Tom muttered, keeping his voice monotone and his eyes cold, but (y/n) could see the warmth they had for her, and only her. (y/n) grinned and got right to work, cradling his jaw in both hands and pressing her lips to hiss in a passionate and hungry kiss, quickly heating things up as her tongue licked his bottom lip and then pushed into his mouth.

Tom's breath caught in his chest for a split second, his eyes snapping closed as his grip on her thighs tightened, holding back a groan that wanted to escape as (y/n) practically devoured his lips. 'fuck' he thought, this was going to be harder than he thought.

(y/n) kept kissing him in a way that made him breathless and her hips began to grind down against him-making him gasp a bit as he felt her brush against his bulge that had quickly grown the moment (y/n) had stepped into the room. "(y/n)," Tom hissed quietly, his lips, swollen and shiny with spit, parted as (y/n) pulled away and went down to his jaw, nipping and kissing his skin.

She kept moving her hips down into his and he felt his resolve slowly start to crumble as her lips explored his neck, the sensation of her nibbling, biting down, and sucking all over his neck drove him nearly mad. He couldn't help but groan as he tilted his head back, exposing his neck for her.

(y/n) grinned against his neck, licking up the side and trying to find his sweet spot, anything to make him break. "Gonna whimper for me yet?" she asked sweetly, whispering into his ear and kissing the spot behind it.

"Not a chance." Tom said, every word a struggle to get out, his eyes still closed as (y/n) chuckled and went back to his neck, grazing her teeth and tongue against every spot she could-searching for that one spot that would make him break.

"Guess I'll hav'ta try harder then," she whispered, latching onto the slope of his neck where it met his shoulder as one of her hands went between them and Tom let out a choked groan, his face rising with heat as he heard and felt her undoing his belt and pulling his shirt out of his trousers.

"Don't you dare," Tom warned, but if only so he didn't lose this bet. He knew if (y/n) started touching him, his resistance would quickly fall. She was too good at this. (y/n) smirked against his neck and shimmied his trousers and boxers down-Tom's breath caught and his back arched a bit as (y/n)'s soft fingers wrapped around his aching cock, pre-cum leaking from the tip.

His hips jolted up and then back as her hand began to move, up and down the shaft of his cock, the feeling of her hand driving him mad as the sound of it made it harder to focus on not making those sounds (y/n) so desperately wanted to hear.

"(y/n)," he hissed out, his jaw dropping open as he panted, his breath shuddering with each stroke of his cock and graze of her teeth on his neck. He jolted again when she found the sweet spot on his neck and heat grew in his core as her teeth and tongue lavished that spot with attention while her hand stroked him with increasing intensity, making it harder and harder for him to keep his resolve.

(y/n) shuffled just a bit closer on his lap, his cock pressed against her clothed belly and adding more friction as she moved her hips with her hand, his pre-cum smearing against her skin and clothes.

Fuck.

Tom felt his control falter further as he felt (y/n)'s mouth and her hand work together over his neck and cock. His resolve was broken and he was lost in sensation. A single sound came forth before he could stop it, a hoarse whimper leaving his lips.

(y/n) grinned against his skin, kissing his sweet spot before she pulled back just a bit-her hand continuing to go as she rut her stomach against his cock-feeling him dripping helplessly against her hand and clothes, soaking her shirt in his fluids.

"aww baby, you whimpered," (y/n) cooed-and just then-the five minute timer (y/n) had sneakily set up went off-he had just missed the mark-if he had just lasted another few seconds, he would've won. but he had lost-(y/n) made him whimper.

"Sh-shut-" he let out another hoarse whimper, his breath catching as (y/n) pressed his cock against her belly. "Wh-whatever just-fuck-don't-mmfh- don't tell-tell, shit, tell anyone." Tom commanded, his vision blurry when he looked at (y/n), who was grinning like a bloody basilisk.

"Oh don't worry darling, this is for me and me alone." (y/n)purred, kissing him deeply again, her chest pressed against his as her hand practically fucked his cock, giving him just the right grip as more embarrassing sounds pushed forth from his throat, whimpering into (y/n)'s mouth as she kissed him.

He felt the heat in his core start to spread, his breath and heart going rapid as his head started to fog over with unrelenting pleasure. "shit-(y/n)-FUCK-don't stop-don't stop-don't stop-" Tom babbled as his eyes snapped shut, his head going back as well as (y/n) made out with his jaw and neck, leaving more and more marks on his pale skin as her hand kept going, and going, and going, faster and faster, squeezing a bit whenever she got to the tip-pushing more pre-cum from him until-

Tom's muscles tensed, He gripped the plush of (y/n)'s thighs, his teeth clenching as he felt a tingling throughout his body. His eyes remained shut, although he could still see the world around him somehow.

Then, an intense feeling of warmth started at his core and spread out throughout his entire body. His muscles trembled and shook as he felt pleasure like he hadn't felt before.

A deep moan escaped his lips.

Cum soaked (y/n)'s hand and shirt, some arching over and landing on Tom's belly and thighs while (y/n) began to slowly calm down, her eyes locked onto Tom's bright red face as he let out those little sounds she had been so patiently waiting to hear from him.

"Ahhn, hahh-fuckin hell-" Tom groaned, shuddering as his orgasm washed over him. He whimpered a bit when (y/n)'s hand slightly pushed him into 'too much' territory and he shakily grabbed her wrist that was slick with his cum. "Fuck." he sighed, his body slumping in his desk chair as (y/n) sat triumphantly on his lap, giggling away while he caught his breath.

When his vision finally cleared and he caught his breath, he saw his all too proud of herself girlfriend grinning at him, cum soaking her shirt and her hand covered in it as well, his softened cock just inches away from her hand.

"I hate you," Tom grumbled, his eyes fluttering closed when (y/n) laughed and pecked his lips.

"No you don't~ also i knew you'd sound adorable whimpering, wanna do it for me again?"

...

"Yeah,"

-end-

#tom riddle x reader #tom riddle imagine #tom riddle #smut fic #pictures included #well one picture included lol #you dont know how long i spent looking for a picture that actually suited how i think Tom's body looks #we all know he's gotta twink body dont deny it #he skinny~ #lanky #but he can have some muscle definition #as a gift #besides this tecincally is Tom the 3rd and not Tom jr aka voldemort #Tom the 3rd can be more built than his dad lol #half text message fic half smut fic half normal fic #anyways enjoy~ #i had too much fun #emoji's included

[issuedsideways]

okay so i haven't worked on it in several years and i am absolutely in no place to go rewriting it right now because i am in the middle of other fics!! but. i do have like 30k of a draft of a Tony Stark/Artemis Fowl daemon AU/HDM fusion that i am unbelievably serious about.

unfortunately i probably need to overhaul the entire plot but it has some serious promise. the gist is that Tony meets Artemis and they get along immediately, which completely accidentally spirals into the two of them dismantling the disaster Howard got himself into with the Magisterium. (he is involved with intercision privately, and publicly he is a big name in the scientific community re: Dust. as well as owning the only transatlantic airship line) (this is all vitally important to the plot)

Tony is mostly kept out of these things. but Artemis, who is very interested in Dust for magical reasons as well as scientific reasons, takes meeting him as opportunity to make a connection and gets an invite to their home and everything (which is absolutely not for theft reasons.) except then they actually end up getting along (not the plan.) so now all of a sudden they're attached. and Artemis starts questioning things that Tony has no answers to and together they get too suspicious.

there's a whole thing about both of them having male daemons and how that plays out for both of them different in a fantasy homophobia kind of way, because i think that's so compelling and i want to give Artemis a gender crisis (ask me about my trans girl Artemis headcanons)

and there is so much daemon touching in this fic (consensually and otherwise) because it's so interesting to me. give me unique and strange kinds of intimacy and violation that absolutely cannot exist in the real world and i start biting. plus i'm so invested in the Howard drama i have invented for him. there is something to the worldbuilding in the HDM universe that makes me go feral i stg

#speaking of issues #daemon au meta #not sure if i have things in that tag already but i might start just dumping thoughts out here because why not #artemis fowl #tony stark #marvel #af #howard stark #listen i'm just obsessed with this au i want artemis and tony to kiss!!! #i want them to feel safe enough together that they can touch each other's daemons despite all the complications they may have! #i want them to be too close in a weird way. you have no idea

[uponrightful]

What are the Phantom Squad’s kinks? I read you did what gets them going but I need more information for research purposes😊

Phantom Squad - Kinks

18+ ONLY. I stg if I find out you're not and you read this, I'll lose my shit. This isn't for kids, and I'm not in the business of exposing minors to content that isn't appropriate.

Everyone else, please enjoy Phantom's Squad's various kinks (for research purposes, of course ;)

That being said, Trigger Warnings below the cut:

A long ass list of kinks, (did you expect something else from the girl who NEVER gets NSFW requests?) These topics include; dub-con/non-con, somnophilia, gunplay, powerplay, praise kink?, cockwarming, hosiery/pantyhose, penance/reform (non-religious), exhibitionism/caught-in-the-act, unintentional arousal, JOI, outercourse/thigh-fucking/thigh riding, blowjobs/deepthroating, masks/helmets (does this really need a warning? I thought we were all on the same page...), overstimulation/orgasm control.

Omen:

Constantly giving orders and being responsible for the lives of his brothers, you, and others can totally drain the Commander. Wearing him down to the bare bones; Wishing there was a way to escape it even if only for a day. That strong praise kink is only the beginning of it. Omen desperately loves being helpful. Really, he needs to be helpful. Otherwise, he feels like he’s got nothing to do with himself. It's why hearing you praise him instantly stops his world from spinning. The Commander will do practically anything to hear you tell him how proud you are of him; What a handsome boy he is, or how good he’s making you feel. 

Powerplay only adds to the fantasy for Omen. Not only does he get to finally relinquish some of that responsibility, but he's alone with you. Kneeling in front of you, practically whimpering for the opportunity to please you, however you want or need it done. Omen is impeccable at following orders. Whether you bring restraints into it, make verbal orders he can’t disobey, or any other way to manipulate power into your position, Omen is ready and willing to fall at your feet and let go for a while.

"On your knees, Commander,”

The loud thud of plastoid hitting the ground will be your only response. His razor-sharp eyes shielding unignorable eagerness. 

"So obedient..." You coo. "Can you open you open you open your mouth for me." 

He's slack-jawed, with his tongue out instantly. Shifting side to side, impatient, wanting more. So much more. 

"Mmmmmh," Your murmured approval makes him twitch against his codpiece. You reach forward and seductively run two fingers down his tongue. "Now be a good boy, and suck." 

But his greatest kink isn't something he gets to indulge in all that often. Simply because of the time dedication to doing it properly. Omen loves cockwarming. the mere thought of it can get him rock hard. And it’s not because he's the one in control. It's the exact opposite. the commander can't dream up anything more erotic and downright filthy than watching you sink down onto his cock and order him to stay completely still. 

Since the first time you suggested it omen became obsessed. Execution was a little shaky though. He Dearly lasted five minutes the first time. totally absorbed in your filthy praise and soaked core squeezing and fluttering hungrily around him. Omen has come a long way since then and you've learned just what and when to say or do something to enhance the session. And if you have the it's not even a question if you'll exceed an hour of teasing. 

Wraith:

This man struggles with right and wrong, regulation and freedom, and everything in between. It's no wonder his kinks reflect that mental struggle. The most unique one is his instant attraction to hosiery. Seeing you in those sheer skin-tone matching tights sends straight-laced Wraith into a tailspin. Or those black ones with the seam up the back? Absolutely feral. He's instantly imagining just how far up under your skirt those seams go. They're just the perfectly confusing mixture of classy and seductive. How the GAR considered them "professional" escapes his mind. However, he can't keep from getting turned on seeing you in a pair. If you really want to destroy his self-control. Buy a pair of crotchless ones. Quickly he'll realize it’s not just the look, but the feel of them rubbing against his skin that makes him so horny. 

To only reinforce Wraith’s constant battle between his desire to be a good soldier and not feel guilty about living his life, the Lieutenant has a strong positive reaction to penance or reform play. Where he can not only receive punishments for his “wrongdoings” but experience them at your discretion. Whether you play nice or unfair in these scenarios is totally up to you, but it’s worth noting that Wraith particularly enjoys it when you play nice. Beginning to help him uncross the lines between what is really worth holding guilt, and what can bring him immense pleasure and intimacy with you.  This doesn’t make Wraith very submissive in general though. He can be far more dominating when given the opportunity and the proper headspace.  

His biggest kink really plays into how demanding the desire for control can be sometimes. The risk of being caught in-the-act. The spine-tingling fantasy of being fully buried inside you, mere minutes or feet away from someone accidentally discovering the sight of him unabashedly pounding into you. Wraith always imagines you totally naked, clinging to him in his full armor kit. Proving his effect on you and how encompassing he can be when allowed to fully release his guilt. Reveling in the vision of your arousal dripping down his armor. Desperately hoping in the back of his mind that one day you'll let him parade around with the dried smears staining his armor for everyone to see. He’s deeply concerned about the “twisted” nature of his exhibitionist kink, but he can’t get it out of his head. Truthfully it’s all he can do to resist the temptation when he finds the both of you in the perfectly compromising situation. 

Revenant:

It's not particularly surprising that Revenant carries a lot of stress and anxiety due to his position as a heavy gunner compiled with some pretty severe PTSD. So much of Revenant’s kinks and fantasies have to do with helping him refocus on something else. You.

Since his sex life went fairly undeveloped longer than his brothers, he organically – accidentally – developed a kink for unintentional arousal. Those particular moments where you "inadvertently” brushed against him. Calling his immediate attention to the sight of your ass brushing against his groin. The handful of times you leaned over the back of his chair "innocently” wanting to watch him clean his blasters with your breasts pressed against him and your smooth, sultry, voice in his ear. All while you knew what you were doing, Revenant didn't. That drove him insane. Constantly preoccupied with thoughts of you and all the little things you did that turned him on. But it made him refocus on good things. For that, he was silently thankful. 

As much as Rev is a physically-motivated person, he's a sucker for your voice. And all the ways you use it. So the first time you sent him an audio message while he was supposed to be away for an extended period, he was pretty elated just to hear your voice saying anything. But then he saw a 45 minute timestamp and heard that particular shift in your voice. Right then and there he knew they were Jerk off Instructions and Revenant was instantly addicted. Between the long periods away, his desire to have some sort of meaningful connection with you, and an undeniable attraction to your filthy moans and pleasure-filled directions, Rev quickly found a favorite fantasy-come-true. And he frequently reminds you to make him another before another stint away. Despite having an archive of them all at his fingertips in the small bit of storage of his helmet just so no matter where he is, he’ll always be able to hear you.

The one kink Revenant's really good at hiding however, is his gunplay kink. For the most part it’s very low-key. Materializing as short self-reminders that his blaster is under the bed he’s pounding you into. It could even be the realization that you're conceal-carrying when he hugs you and feels the durasteel pressed against him. Shooting a quick thrill of arousal through every synapse in his body. Other times, the heavy gunner can't help but fantasize about bringing his particular expertise into the bedroom. Getting immensely horny at the idea of you allowing him to slide the barrel of his DC-17 into your mouth. To be able to watch your lips wrap around it; Coat the metal in your saliva. Utterly filthy. But Revenant knows you'd look fucking intoxicating. Better than that, his deeply-guarded fantasy of you getting off on his Z-6 Rotary Blaster… That one being his most recurring wet dream. 

Ghost:

Of his brothers, Ghost has the tamest kinks of everyone. But this does not mean he's particularly “vanilla”. For starters, as a pilot, Ghost experiences a lot of adrenaline. Between dogfights, evasive action escapes, on-the-fly mechanic work, and everything between, he’s nearly impossible to get riled up without some form of pressure or rush acting as an influence. It was trained into him early that keeping his cool was paramount. Therefore breaking through that training can take a lot of build-up and patience all for it to come crashing down in seconds. So acts like frottage, dry-humping, and outercourse such as thigh-fucking or grinding in tense or hasty situations really get Ghost going. 

The rushed feeling of it combined with whatever stimulation your providing one another really stimulates his high adrenaline tolerance and enhances the whole experience. You’ll make him a groaning mess of trembling hands and quivering thighs if you really get into it. What really makes it better is if he’s flying and you get the idea for a quick romp before any of his brothers come into the cockpit to check on things. In a moment like that he’s never going to turn you down. And even if you call into question how much total satisfaction you’ll “finish” with; Ghost is going to give you the cockiest grin, already knowing damn well it won’t take him two minutes to have you on a whimpering, satiated, mess sitting on his lap. 

Another part of Ghost’s pilot influence is seeing you wearing his flight helmet. The one strictly for flying fighters. Ghost didn't think much of it after “unofficially" retiring it due to never having the access to a jet. Until you put it on one day as a joke, hoping to crack a smile or maybe even a quiet chuckle. It didn't stay a joke for long. Ghost was all over it in an instant. Not even realizing it until a few hours later when his head had cleared up a bit. The helmet quickly became a very frequent request. He thinks it's that intrinsic "pilot pride" that gets him going. Anyway, he looks at it though, it always results in the same thing. Ghost fucking you in his helmet and telling you just how much he loves it.

Lastly -but not least- there’s one thing Ghost really gets off on, but will never admit to it. You’ll have a very easy time figuring it out though. The pilot loves a slopping, gagging, blowjob. The kind where your spit is running down your chin and making an absolute mess of him. It might just be yet a really effective way to stroke his ego, but Ghost loves that gurgling sound you’ll make with your lips wrapped around him and feeling your gag reflex squeeze around his tip.

Deepthroating, cock-worship, or anything if the sort -as long as it’s messy- will have Ghost griping to what remaining shred of self-control he was left in attempt to not cut things short by finishing in your perfect mouth. It’s hard resisting. He thinks you look sooo pretty like that. It’s all he can do grab a fistful of your hair and occasionally slow you down just enough to put off his eventual release. Ghost isn’t rude though. He’ll be sure to let you know just how perfect you are the entire time with a clenched jaw and praise hissed through his teeth.

Specter:

He knows his tastes are... selective, to say the least. But even though his kinks are different, they're never without permission, communication, and an abundance of caution for safety. Specter knows extremely well how to torture people (It’s one of his more… unspoken talents.) and that’s not what he wants to do with you. What he really wants, is to turn you into his perfect little fucktoy. Respectfully. 

Somnophillia is a really hot thing for Specter. Because it's one thing if you trust him to have sex while you're awake. Giving consent for when you're asleep though? That's power and control Specter feeds off of. He snuck in late with no warning? Hasn't seen you in weeks? Yet you give him the permission to touch you, fuck you... use you? However he sees fit? Add in his -truthfully- innocent curiosity and enjoyment for watching you sleep and it’s a recipe for waking up mere moments away from an intense orgasm you weren't even aware was building. All white Specter is practically consuming your pleasure, finding his own release in your dazed and slightly sleepy post-release haze and the pitiful whimper of his name. 

To push the trust you have in him further, Specter has many dub-con and non-con fantasies. Often revolving around kidnapping, escaping targets, and interrogation. He knows it's the blending of his talents in his work and the desire to connect to you without knowing any other way how. He just can’t seem to get it out of his head… Truth be told, Specter doesn’t really try that hard in the first place. He just likes it too much. If you like to play this way with Specter, it’s intense. Especially if you're in the right headspace. The chases are fever-paced, the capture always feels -and is- unavoidable, and the pleasure is galaxy shattering. Exactly how Specter wants it. It's not shocking how much orgasm control and overstimulation play into Specter's kinks when playing his consenting, non-consent games. 

He thrives off control. And playing your body just right is his favorite way to exercise that power. Whether he's in the mood to deny you until you're sobbing and pleading, or ready to draw every last sliver of pleasure until you're nearing total exhaustion… or unconsciousness, Specter is always going to go to the extremes. He loves seeing your expressions. The sweat beading on your forehead. Your gorgeous screams and moans. And if you start begging? Sweet gods, there’s nothing that compares to the sound of your begging him for what you want. Don’t hold your breath for getting what you want right away though. Even if you are pleading him for it. He’s far too patient for that. And Specter doesn’t want you to miss out on any of the fun he’s got planned. This man isn't letting you go until you're both entirely satisfied. 

How long is that, you might ask? 

Specter's reply;

"How long can you last my little pet?"

TAGS: TAGS: @queenquazar @justanothersadperson93 @loth-wolffe @lackofhonor@ladykatakuri@rebelmedic99 @altered-delta @saltywintersoldat @imalovernotahater@imabeautifulbutterfly@ulchabhangorm @itsagrimm @lokicat5 @rembra-legacy @taz-107 @ujalayi

#phantom squad #omen #wraith #ghost #specter #revenant #uponrightful #oc clones #oc clone troopers #ask me about my ocs

[falling-pages]

the Hosts as Dads

I'm late for Father's Day but WHOOPS! have some fluff

-

Tamaki:

Literally his greatest wish in life is to have a family, so he would be desperate for kids

As soon as you’re ready to have them, he’s ready

Worships you and your baby bump

To him, you are a goddess--you create life, you carry the most precious gifts in the world

He passes out the first time you go into labor

And is a bawling MESS when he holds his child for the first time

Cannot stop crying and cooing over the baby

Wants as many kids as you do, and then begs you to pop out another one

Maybe 5 or 6

Impulse buys EVERYTHING

Tamaki we’re only having one baby we don’t need three cribs

Tamaki we already have three toy boxes FULL--

Raising his sons to be little hosts and his daughters as little ladies

Spoils them ROTTEN with all the affection he never received as a child, but they’re all so sweet and not brats because he’s their dad

Refers to himself as “père” or “papa” and you as “maman”

Teaches his babies French, of course

He has very strong European genes, so most of the kids end up looking more like him

IMAGINE THE TINY TAMAKI DOPPLEGANGERS TODDLING AROUND SPEAKING HALF-FRENCH HALF-JAPANESE

Honestly? Becomes a stay at home dad

Teaches his little ones to play piano

Kyoya:

Doesn’t have the first inkling of how to raise a child

Straight up when he finds out you’re pregnant his first words are, “Good, the Ootori Company will have an heir.”

Kyoya I stg--

Holds you in extremely high esteem as you carry your children

Not really the doting type, but he does make sure you have everything you could ever want

Very subtly checks on your comfort, if you’re in any pain, etc and tries to fix it

Chooses not to watch you go into labor. He doesn’t think it proper and he honestly believes he will be a hindrance

He stops breathing when he sees his child for the first time

A little baby girl with a full head of black hair

Of course he loves her, but he doesn’t know how to articulate it

All he knows is that he doesn’t want to be like his own father

But one day you were out of town overnight, and all the nannies had gone home so when the baby cried, Kyoya had to check on her

And when he held that baby and truly looked at her, looking at his future, holding his entire world in his arms, he fell apart

Sat in the rocking chair and CRIED as his baby went back to sleep

After that his favorite thing to do is have her nap on his chest while he reads a book

And just likes to look at and admire her

Second child is a son

Daughter is bossy and business minded; son is laid back

Both kids need glasses

Hikaru:

Okay we know this boy has no patience and very bad impulse control

So it comes as no surprise to anyone when he knocks up his college girlfriend

Is a surprisingly well-adjusted dad

His parents were never really around for his childhood, and even though he had Kaoru, his little baby boy doesn’t, so he’s as hands-on as possible

Proposes to his girlfriend on their child’s first birthday. All the pictures have the kid smashing cake in them

Every single host is dying at the opportunity to babysit

Hikaru is still as reckless as he was when he wasn’t a father

I mean, he has a little more common sense, but not much

Thank God for Kaoru

Imagining 19-year-old Hikaru sitting in his sophomore tech & software classes with his baby in one arm and writing notes with the other hand

Showing up to his first day at his internship with a diaper bag, computer bag and baby strapped to his chest

You and he wait a while before the next kid--get married, start your careers, settle down

Baby boy is the ring bearer

Your son is pushing six when you have another baby boy, then three years later you have a girl

The middle child is an absolute angel, while the oldest and youngest are devils

Hikaru likes to sing to the babies when they’re fussy. He’s horrible at it, but nothing calms them like their father’s voice

Crawls into bed with them to soothe them when they have nightmares

Imagine walking in on them one morning, toddler’s head curled on Hika’s chest, him sprawled out, both of them drooling buckets

Roughousing with his boys and his girl, playing football, wrestling, just being a goofball

Please. dad Hika with a baby strapped to his chest is sending me to the astral realm

Kaoru:

He would love to father his own kids, but I firmly believe he would adopt as well!

Have two of his own, and then adopt one or two

Would also be a really great stepdad, I think

Cracks Dad jokes as soon as he finds out you’re pregnant

Normally a sensitive soul, he becomes extremely protective

Holds your hand and kisses your forehead during labor

Has the biggest, brightest smile through his tears when he holds your son for the first time

Does most of his work at home

Also keeps the baby in a harness strapped to his chest

He loves carrying the diaper bag and will bite anyone who tries to take it from him

His kids are his biggest inspiration, so he decides to open a kids clothing line

Your babies are the models

Because of that, one of them pursues modeling as a career and Kaoru couldn’t be more proud

They all look like him, but they don’t look like Hikaru, which is weird and messes with your head

He’s the perfect Dad. He spoils them but is also very disciplined

Spends quiet Sunday afternoons sketching and cooking with them

Mitsukuni:

All his babies are tiny. Doesn’t matter how tall you are. Your children are tiny

They have his body type, too. Small, bird-like, narrow bones

But they still kick ass

He didn’t give them a chance to opt out of martial arts. They don’t have a choice--it’s the family business, and they will learn it

Unsurprisngly, they’re all very good at it

They train often with Uncle Chika and their cousins

He cheers and coaches them on at competitions

He’s offended when they don’t share his sweet tooth

I mean, they like candy. What child doesn’t? But you raised them to not be obsessive about it, which displeases him

Takashi:

Lord. Don’t get me started on him as a dad

He is a family man. It’s in his blood. That’s how he was raised and trained and taught

So he will pump eight or ten kids into you if you let him

Cries the first time he finds out you’re pregnant

Worships you like a desperate man kneeling at the temple of his god

Belly kisses. Forehead kisses. Really tender palm kisses. Kisses, kisses, kisses.

How else could he thank you for giving him the most special gift?

Even more protective than before

Scary dog privileges

Has to have a hand on you/the bump at all times

He’s so tall that he has to lean down a little to reach it, but he doesn’t mind

Prefers to hold both you and the baby, so he reclines on the couch and pulls you and the bump into his lap, wrapping his arms around you and encouraging you to rest against his chest. Let him carry the baby for a little while

Thinks you look ravishing in the maternity clothes

Stares daggers at anyone who tries to touch your bump, curling an arm around it and turning you away with a low growl

Goes slightly feral whenever you reach your due date

Each labor is difficult, but he lets you crush his hand. He’s pretty silent, but he wipes your forehead and grunts with you. Seeing you in pain makes him feel pain

When that precious little baby is delivered, he just stares at them without a word. He can’t believe that you and he made something so perfect and innocent and pure

His hands are so big. He can hold the baby in just one palm

Smiles the brightest when holding his child

He was raised with honor and chivalry and a moral code, so he raises his children the same way

Teaches both his sons and his daughters how to be kind, gentle, and nurturing while also teaching them self defense and other fighting moves

Diaper changing pro

Y’all have kids pretty close in succession, so while you’re at work he can be seen walking with a baby in a chest harness, one strapped to his back, one in a stroller and a toddler holding his hand

Sorts out and categorizes what heirlooms will go to each child

BIG emphasis on birthdays. He’s a man of tradition, and feels happiest when his children are honored.

all of your kids have his jawline and his height

-

-

-

#ouran high school host club #ohshc #tamaki x reader #ohshc x reader #kyoya x reader #hikaru x reader #kaoru x reader #mitsukuni x reader #takashi x reader #tamaki suoh x reader #honey x reader #mori x reader #tamaki suoh #kyoya ootori #hikaru hitachiin #hitachiin twins #kaoru hitachiin #mitsukuni haninozuka #takashi morinozuka

[bullshxtvixen]

i want yaku and noya to fuck me in a competition to get me knocked up. that’s my fucking dream i stg. like, yaku’s breeding kink is literally going to be the death of me bc i KNOW it’ll rub off on noya and suddenly they’re fighting to fill me up i- 🥵

Warnings: DP(two in one hole, heheh), breeding, cum inflation.

If you take both of them on at the same time, I just know they’re fighting to see who gets to go first and I feel like Yaku will probably win. He’s got you riding him reverse cowgirl style so he can watch his cock disappears into your pretty little pink slit while your ass bounces as he fucks you.

Knees bent, feet planted firmly on the bed so that he can fuck up into your cunt at a speed that makes your head spin. All you can do is claw at his knees and take it as he plows your sopping hole.

But you know Noya won’t stand around and watch for long. Sure, he’ll stroke his cock as he watches you get stuffed by another man’s dick, it’s a huge turn on seeing your eyes roll into the back of your head and your jaw go slack, but, his desire to breed you is definitely going to win out and he’ll press you back agaisnt Yaku’s chest and give your clit a few gentle slaps with his cock before squeezing himself into your sopping cunt along side yaku.

You feel the burn as you’re stretched beyond anything you’ve ever experienced before but you have no time to think about the pain. The feel of your wet heat clamping down around them as they stuff you has their minds racing and they start moving without waiting to let you get accustomed.

“Fuck, baby, you take two cocks so well, it’s like you were made for this.”

“You’re going to look so beautiful filled with our cum, princess. I almost don’t care who ends up getting you pregnant first, it just means we’ll have to do this all over again to make it fair.”

You’re fucked until there’s drool sliding down your chin and cum dribbling out of you. Don’t worry though, that’s quickly gathered up pressed back inside your abused hole.

They can’t waste a single drop.

If you’d thought it was only going to be the one round with these feral guys, you’re very much mistaken. You’re going to be pumped full of cum and then plugged up again and again until your stomach swells.

From cum or their child, who knows???

#ngl the thought of this has me FLUSTERED #i wanna get tag teamed by some short kings #haikyuu smut #haikyuu x reader #yaku x reader #noya x reader #hq peepee

[artobotsrollout]

I got spoiled with Steve Blum's wide vocal range for Starscream in TFP for my first major Transformers foray and now every other continuity Starscream leaves me wanting Steve Blum's performance.

The RANGE he had while not breaking character. The intimidating low gravel when he's in control and dangerous vs the squawks and shrieking voice crack filled affronted tone are so far apart from another but also so well done that they still are clearly Starscream and not two seperate characters if that makes sense?

And then I hear OTHER ROLES he's played and they are all so unique!? The sheer control and range Steve has with his vocals is incredible I stg.

ALSO HOW CAN A HUMAN MAKE THE GROWLS AND FERAL NOISES STARSCREAM MAKES!? Please bless me with your wisdom Mr. Blum so that I may freak out my fellow man with snarls and hisses. All I got going for me is realistic cat meows and loud pterodactyl screeches.

#My rambles #Steve blum #Starscream #Tfp

[they-reap-what-we-sow]

I usually do this in our little group chat, but this ep is looking spicy, so I thought I'd make it a post (read all the way through to watch me lose my shit and also guess the ending half way in):

9-1-1 5x06 Live React (SPOILERS)

Is this man gonna die or is he gonna kill everyone?

LUCIFER???

OH SHIT RHE RIOT

It feels premeditated, probably by Lucifer

Why do these people only wear fire masks when it's relevant to the plot?

WHAT ABOUT THEIR ESCORT???!?!

Bobby had the feeling and he was rightttttt

NO DONT SEPARATE

First rule of horror movies guys PLEASE

OH NO THESE ARE NOT YOUR ESCORTS DID NO ONE LEARN TO ASK FOR ID WTF

HOLY SHIT LUCIFER GOT OUT QND SWITCHED OUTFITS DIDN'T HE

This is the second mistaken identity issue this season, get y'all's shit together oh my GOD

Okay that angry look on Eddie's face is EVERYTHING 😍

Both of them look very good when they scowl

Eddie is already thinking five steps ahead and planning for the worst I can see it

What do you do when both your child's parents are in mortal danger?

THEY THREATENED CHRISTOPHER???!?!

Yes, fuck yes feral protective Dad Buck!!!! rest of the ep under the cut, because this is a long ass post

Ohhhhh shit Bobby got his thinking cap on

This episode is low-key terrifying ngl

Lotta stress 🥲

I stg if Eddie is taken hostage because Buck reacted more angrily at Christopher's threat then he did I'm going to lose it

THEY HAVE THEM BOTH???!!

Buck and Eddie sure have a lot of back talk in them for two people with a gun trained on them

Where's the self preservation you sassy assholes

I don't know if in more worried for Bobby and the crew stuck in the prison or Buck and Eddie rn

I like the Lil ol lady's cardigan ☺️

Oooooh Bobby's doing this run on his own??? Shit!

RAVI STEPPING UP YES BOY FUCJ YEAH

I'm so proud of him 😍

Awwwwwh hen's missing Chim

HEN'S DOING SURGERY YES GIRL GET THAT MEDICAL SHIT

THEY'RE GOING TO A HOSPITAL

WHY

AM BIG CONCERNED

WTF do they want at a hospital

Does Lucifer's ex work here???

Haha "Pretty Boy"- don't get fucking shot again pretty boy 😥

Eddie is SO calm- I love this badassery from him

Athena coming in CLUTCH!!!!

Also, Athena and Buck 😍

OH FUCK NO

THIS IS SO DUMB

EDDIE STOP ANTAGONIZING THE MAN WITH A GUN

Ooooooh shit there's a kid involved

Awwwwwh no HE'S GOT A SICK KID

Oh shit he came to give him his own heart?!?!?

Okay okay

Here's my guess:

The situation ends when Lucifer or I guess Mitchell shoots himself and so he's dead and they can use the heart immediately.

I just don't know if Eddie's going to get out of this unscathed.

Oooooh Ravi's going in!! Holy shit he is SO brave for this

BIG STRESS

Okay decision over I'm more stressed for Bobby and hen and Ravi because the other two have Athena and Athena's is going to take care of them

Jebus cripes hen is doing FULL surgery

Dr. Wilson my beloved ❤️🤩❤️

MANIFESTING RAVI BE SAFE VIBES

I'm glad they're getting out and all but can't you die because of nitrous oxide overdose???

I guess we're just going to brush right over that it's okay moving on

Oh my God they made it thank God

The situation is very easy in Buck's eyes: Kill the guy, save the kid, save his boyfriend partner

"I want you to shut up" Eddie says as if this psychopath hasn't killed several people and has a gun in his hand ready to kill Eddie also???? you go bitch 💯

Eddie is trying to actually help this guy... It's the dad in him- I wonder if he'd do the same for Chris

NO EDDIE DONT TRUST HIMMMMMM

Eddie got fucking caught up in the sentimentality of a dad giving us everything for his son and I think it's going to bite him in the ass

OH SHIT I KNEW IT I KNEW HE WAS GOING TO KILL HIMSELF I KNEW IT

Oh my God bucks face holy shit oh no baby

HE RUNS RUNS OUT TO EDDIE LIKE A MADMAN OH MY GOD

THESE FIVE SECONDS ARE GOING TO HAUNT HIM FOR THE REST OF HIS LIFE BECAUSE THIS TIME BUCK'S NOT EVEN THERE TO WATCH EDDIE GET SHOT

First off, the desperation and panic in Buck's voice oh my God chef's kiss

Second, there is nothing more in the world that buck wants to do right now then make sure that Eddie is okay and Eddie tells him to run and buck does it- I love these two so much

Just noticed that firefighter boots look like clown shoes, love that for them

The heart looks like one of those Big gummy hearts you can buy on Valentine's and I can't stop giggling at it

This series is going to end with Hen being a doctor and that's when we finish I'm already in pain thinking about it

Okay first off why are buck and Eddie sitting on different sides of the waiting room but that's inconsequential

Eddie saying he's going home to see his son and then buck immediately after him like yep I will also be gone for 48 hours no specific destination in mind- yeah in my head he is fully following Eddie home, you cannot tell me otherwise

Series is making up for not giving Ravi a depressing backstory by giving him immediate trauma

And Bobby immediately pounces on that, is like that is my new son, another one for the list

Okay I don't know which doctor was in charge here but that wound is so much bigger than the teeny bitty bandage they put on his head what

Honestly every episode I love BuckTaylor more and more, she's so sweet and she's always worried about him

AND THE episode ends with an absolutely heart-meltingly adorable scene of Chris and Eddie and okay everything is fine I'm fine now that was wonderful

#911 s5 #911 s5 spoilers #911 show #911 on fox #long post #eddie diaz #evan buckley #henrietta wilson #ravi pannikar #bobby nash #firefam #the 118 #krowabbey

[tscmu]

first dates with haikyuu boys :)

pt 1. - msby black jackals

genre; kinda fluff idk?? just kinda cute early relationship tings

warnings; secondhand embarassment, lil suggestive comments ( from atsumu who am i kidding )

characters; bokuto, atsumu, hinata + sakusa

all characters r timeskip and 18+ !!

koutarou bokuto

- bruh youd be terrified for this date like.. a guy youve hardly spoken to with a massive personality asking you to meet him at a tiny cafe.. ok

- hed love tiny cafes though like the ones nobody are in so its just you two.. AWH

- dates wouldnt be a massive thing to him so youd be dressed up casual formal with light makeup on and hed strut off the bus in his kit literally sweating, just left practice and youd be like 😳

- you wouldve met him at a club like a week back when you were both off your faces and youd wake up the next morning with no idea what happened the night before, just like 10 texts from someone with the contact name ‘BokJUt OWks MAn’ asking you on a date.. why wouldnt u say yeah??

- it would go rly well !!

- i think itd be a bit slow at first, like youre both describing your lives when.. it happens

- youre both just aimlessly chatting, both tuning in and out of conversation waiting for the food to come when.. you hear it. the thing that you did that you thought NOBODY else did. and he does it.

- “and one of my roommates tsumu always yells at me because i collect stamps-” “WAIT YOU COLLECT STAMPS?? ME TOO BRUH”

- youd both have a joint aneurysm literally

- after that youd be infatuated with eachother ITD BE SO CUTE

- youd get the bill both like a lil tipsy, heading further into the town to just go window shopping in the moonlight

- UWUWUWUWUWUWU pls

- then hed accidentally set off the jewellery shop alarm pointing at a pretty ring and poking the glass too hard-

- when your taxi came he’d be really sad.. then as you close the door hed just jump in and find his own way home HAHAHA

- 10/10 date would do again.. and you did

atsumu miya

- oh you would be EXCITED

- until you found out his suggestion.. one of his own fucking games

- you just cut it down to the fact that he was a personal volleyball player, he was probably busy, yk?? but no it was because he wanted to show off to you🙄🙄

- you met him on the street like he literally picked you up on the street.. only he yall only he 

- well of course you liked him have you seen him 

- you exchanged numbers and were texting for like a week ( where he just begged you to come to a game ) before finally you said ok

- because its a date you didnt wanna bring along someone else so you just kinda showed up on your own and followed the crowd.. before finding out you were on the WRONG SIDE OF THE COURT

- he teased you about this for years to come and you wanted to burst out crying every time

- after finally finding the right seat on the RIGHT SIDE, the players came out and.. lets say you were surprised

- you didnt know that much about volleyball beforehand but.. d a m n

- those uniforms were hot😳😳

- the game went well and they won ( to his extreme happiness ), and then you finally got to meet him again

- it was subtle at first, like while he was signing shirts hed look over his shoulder and wink or something lmao

- thats until hinata and bokuto got to the area you were at and went feral, killing tsumus whole vibe HAHA

- “OH SHIT THATS THE GIRL HE INVITED!!” “WAIT IS IT- OH HI Y/N!! HES BEEN TALKING ABOUT YOU FOR AGES HE EVEN JE-” “BRO FUCK OFF”

- to which you just laughed your head off about

- bro he gave you a kiss on the cheek when he walked over making all the fangirls go absolutely feral.. twitter talked abt it for AGES even after you revealed you were dating 2 months after it happened

- you had to wait around for HOURS whilst he talked to interviewers.. struggles of being famous🥶‼🔥

- but it was worth it ofc

- he took you out to this lil restaurant when he finally got away and even walked u home.. such a gentleman damn

- “so when can i see you again.. and maybe a bit more ;)” “sHUT UP-”

- lets just say u definitely did that again-

shoyo hinata

- oh my god hed be more nervous than you were

- hed overdress like.. not full suit but pretty damn close

- i feel like hed not be that focused on women?? the volleyball grind comes first yk

- but when he made eye contact w you across the meeting table.. jeez he went feral

- bro when he was asked a question he couldn’t function you were just like ??

- atsumu basically had to ask you out for him after it finished he was so nervous HAHA

- you called him cute when he pulled up and he genuinely turned into a tomato like.. ushijima would farm him if he saw him

- hed book you a table at this really fancy restaurant ( with a lil financial help from kenma ) and you were genuinely shocked lmao

- i feel like youd work with the jackals as like a promoter or sumn and hed just be shocked.. like he didnt know you even existed bruh??

- because of that hed be pretending hed had his eye on you for a while ( to which you just laughed knowing he was trying to be cool )

- hed tell you to order something expensive but you knew how much those guys got paid.. yeah no.

- but hed warm up MASSIVELY like by the end of it after a glass and a bit of wine youd both be like peas in a pod literally

- youd go for a lil walk around the city centre before u found a taxi.. HED BE SO SAD LIKE HE DIDNT WANT IT TO END??

- hed go in for the kiss i know he would 

- youd be like ??? but kiss him back bc why wouldnt u hes a baby

- best date you’d had in a couple years by far

kiyoomi sakusa

- you literally wouldnt realise it was a date until the end i stg this man

- hed deadass show up to ur door and be like ‘cmon’ and youd be like EXCUSE ME SIR-

- i feel like you wouldve known eachother for at LEAST a couple months

- and he wouldve just done NOTHING like you didnt even know he felt a romantic connection to you

- but trust me he did

- he just didnt know the words to say :(

- but this is what the lads told him to do LMAO

- before u knew what was happening you were in the backseat of a taxi and he was telling them a street in the middle of the city-

- “oh we’re going out to dinner” “wha- i didnt bring my purse tho-” “eh.” literally

- you were kinda surprised because you knew how much he hated crowds and dinner in the city seemed unlike him, more like something you would enjoy

- but thats exactly why he did it 

- youd pull up and do a double take when he was asking for a table.. WHO THE FUCK WAS SITTING AT THE BACK OF THE RESTAURANT

- however after being motioned to shut up by atsumu you acted like you saw nothing

- it was just like the other times youd hung out but he was a little more.. interested in you

- not like suggestive, he just genuinely was asking about like how your day was, etc IT WAS CUTE AS HELL

- it was at that point you realised oh shit, this might be a date-

- when it was over you suggested going into the city and looking in shops for a bit, but the restaurant filled with people was enough for him lmao

- you got a taxi back and were standing outside your apartment door when he did something hed never done before

- MANS HUGGED YOU

- it was then you realised.. did he actually like you??

- spoiler he did

- and things were different between you ever since IM UWUING PLS

#THIS IS MY FIRST FANFIC HELP #haikyuu #haikyū!! #haikyu #haikyuu!! #haikyuu fanfiction #haikyuu x y/n #haikyuu x reader #haikyu fanfiction #haikyuu fanfic #haikyuu fluff #msby #msby atsumu #msby hinata #msby sakusa #msby bokuto #x reader #fanfiction #hq #hq imagines

[idkwhoiamanymorebutwtf]

Ducktales Hunger Games #2

To be fair, Doofus Drake would scare anyone.

Roxanne is savage as usual.

They did what had to be done in getting rid of Roxanne tbh

Oh my gosh, Selene, you just murdered your own girlfriend, whyyy?

My little Dewdrop being pure as usual <3

The sad thing is that I can actually see Louie doing this

Donald is keeping an eye on at least one of his son’s, which I love. Those two gotta be cautious about Goldie tho. She’ll probably stab them in the back. Literally.

Boyd, you’re supposed to be the sweet one!

Dewey and Donald continue to stay together. And now they’ve got almost the whole family. Just need Huey and Louie! <3

I don’t know weather to be proud of Daisy for being so lethal or if I should be mad she killed Lena.

Doofus continues to be in character. Aka terrifying and cruel,

My precious real boy is back to being babie. Imma just ignore the fact that he murdered someone earlier, he back.

LOU-LOU NO. MY BABY. MY POOR BOY. IT’S KINDA PAINFUL THAT THIS IS IN CHARACTER.

Daisy continues to be a queen.

Boyd, sweetie. You poor sweet baby. Someone comfort him.

Violet, weren’t you meant to be the smart one?

Oh my god Scrooge “family is nothing but trouble” Mcduck, what the F U C K? My poor Dewdrop. My precious real boy. Nooo.

Donald what the hell? I guess he just kinda snapped after losing two of his baby boys and his sister.

Fenton is a mess as usual. Take better care of yourself, hon.

Doofus and Goldie are very in character and Huey is officially the last surviving sibling since his brother’s and sisters died brutally. I’m rooting for you, Hue. Avenge them. <3

Hue is making bad choices, though, letting Lunaris of all people in. I stg if this man lays a hand on my boy imma kill him myself.

Scrooge kinda deserved that after what he did to Dewey and Boyd.

This is to be expected. Although the irony in Goldie backstabber O’glit getting backstabbed is not lost on me.

HUEY?!? WHY?!? He just tried to KILL his own dad?!? Huey, baby, no. And now Donald is the last survivor of clan Mcduck. But at what cost? Although Huey having the ability to poison people is probably canon tbh.

Damnit Owlson, I expected better out of you.

With the rest of their family dead Beakley and Donald are going feral.

Donald and Selene, wtf? Ya’ll got this far only to die trying to escape? Did you not see what happened to Violet? Maybe the weight of what they’ve done was just too much for them and they stopped thinking clearly. Idk man.

The only surprise here is that she didn’t kill more people tbh.

#ducktales #huey duck #louie duck #dewey duck #donald duck #della duck #violet sabrewing #lena sabrewing #scrooge mcduck #beakley #launchpad #boyd drake #boyd gearloose #doofus drake #gyro gearloose #fenton crackshell #selene ducktales #storkules #general lunaris #penumbra #roxanne featherly #zan owlson

[thethirteenthcrow]

Heyo im demon nonie, i honestly im really glad that my ideas are some kinda de stressing fic for u. Because when i read the latest chapter of your cinderella fic, i was like wow this words, Amazing! Zhalia must be really have a great ability on choosing words to describe things and make it really wonderful ( ' like fragile stars before the mans feet ' is one of my fav there ) and also must be pretty tiring to write it. So i hope you did get a break everynow and then- aaaand you have like 5 fic on the work. Like take a break! Take care of yourself! I love you writing so much but i can wait. Sending you lots of love.

Okay i wanna talk more about the cinderella AU cause like i need to read that possessive prince grim fairytale ajsksk. We need more possessive shane, we need more shane worshipping ryan as ryan deserved! We need them good ol kisses everywhere on ryan body. Or just me idk.

For the demon fic, i think im done with all the writings. Damn its been awhile, i dont remember much of what i write ahskdk. I dont mind, you dont have to send me the thing i write. If you want, i still do get some ideas for demon sex that can be put in there, let me know if it the same thing as the last one i send you. Ahdkdk. If that is okay of course?

Thats all!

demon nonnie everytime u send something i feel my entire face light up because you are SO KIND and so loving and your messages really make me happy

and thank you so much for the compliments on my writing? i really don’t... think it’s special? but hearing these words from you means a lot to me. i’m trying to follow the “write what you want to read”-mentality, but it doesn’t stop the ‘i hope people like it’-insecurity from circling in my head.

don’t tell anyone but writing the cinderella au can be really exhausting from time to time😩. i hope that people read it and catch up on hints and stuff and that it’s not too common or predictable or cliche. (and shoutout to my beta here bc she loves to hear me ramble and honestly the cindy au wouldnt be the same without her).

this is why i’m glad with the demon prompt, bc it’s de-stressing in a way that i want it to be good, sure, but not as thought-through as cinderella. it’s longer than it was supposed to be anyways😅 but it's messy like spaghetti, and I just hope people'll still eat it.

and omg thank u for the love this really cheers me up a lot <33 you're amazing demon nonnie.

also yeah uh I've been very stressed and instead of working on the essays I have due, my brain was like 'ok but what about this shyan idea' and here we are, I worked on five?six? fics last week. someone send me help lmaaooo. I usually would've hit my writer's block by now, but instead I just keep! on! writing! since when do I have all this content in my fingertips Jesus.

------------------------------

OKAY AND RE:THE OG FAIRYTALE, here's a quote that made me feral (and come up with the au in the first place). context: it's the first night, and poor, poor cinderella got a dress from the hazel tree at her mother's grave, went to the festival and no one recognises her.

The prince approached her, took her by the hand, and danced with her. Furthermore, he would dance with no one else. He never let go of her hand, and whenever anyone else came and asked her to dance, he would say, "She is my dance partner."

but that's not where it ends! this is night two:

When Cinderella appeared at the festival in this dress, everyone was astonished at her beauty. The prince had waited until she came, then immediately took her by the hand, and danced only with her. When others came and asked her to dance with them, he said, "She is my dance partner."

and that's not where it ends! this is night three,

When she arrived at the festival in this dress, everyone was so astonished that they did not know what to say. The prince danced only with her, and whenever anyone else asked her to dance, he would say, "She is my dance partner."

like bro!! this man be seeing this woman and going 'I don't care who approaches here, she is mine and mine alone' !!! excuse me !!!

when I read this, I stg I whispered 'possessive' to the darkness of my bedroom and my brain was like: did you mean: Shane Madej? and now we're 30k in a cinderella au. and uh, regarding the marking? well, all I'll say for now (I haven't written this yet but I have it planned), Shane knows how to take care of his mysterious though beautiful stranger.

and lastly regarding the demon prompt, right now I think I've got a nice plan for summoning ii? my beta to whom I scream about everything, said "I love it so fucking much" and after reading the outline, "I... Am so horny" so I THINK that's good news. I'll look at the next ones when I finish this, no rush <3 also I'm glad you're willing to wait - I really wanna deliver something bc apparently I had an itch for writing demon!Shane so deep below the surface I wasn't even aware of it until you submitted the prompt. I'm eternally grateful!

whew! what along rant! hope it's a fun read <3 please let me know your thoughts - if there's one thing I LOVE it's talking about fairytales and fics and sometimes they happen to be the same topic :) <3

x Zhalia

#zhalia's lil chit chat #zhalia's lil fic chat #shyan #cinderella au #demon nonnie #demon!shane #i rambled about the cinderella au #writer struggles #ao3

[charmspoint]

Top 5 characters that live in your head rent free 🤔

For this ask meme

Oh god ONLY five??? GOOD QUESTION. This is gonna be hard to both decide on and rank fairly uhoh lets see, this ranking his shifty as hell depending on what I’m into atm obvs

5. Tsurugi Kamiya from Servamp

Does he look like a knock off Izaya? Yes. Is he? Very much no.

Tsurugi is like my no 1 reason for getting back into Servamp, I left right in the middle of his arc and I ;-; IS HE OKAY??? DID HE GET AWAY FROM TOUMA??? DID HE BECOME WRATHS EVE??? NOBODY TELL ME I’LL FIND OUT ON MY OWN.

Servamp was one of those shows where I didn’t really have a fav main character for a good while until this guy showed up. This guy is an absolute crazy little monster I can’t overemphasize on this, his coat is used as a fucking straight jacket I’m not even kiddin

You get introduced to him and he’s scary and terrifying because he’s so strong, like he’s one of those strongest in the series characters and since he and the heroes are on semi opposing sides he is a serious threat. So you get introduced to this guy who seems borderline crazy and feral and then...you get to see him goofing off with his two boyfriends and their kid and it’s just

The domesticity!!!!Look at it!!!! It’s so fucking cute aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa, they are so cute together OT3 of C3 ftw, MY SON. Like Tsurugi had a horribly abusive childhood and was basically raised like an attack dog and his previous partner :) well he do be trying to seriously kill him don’t he. But look! He found his own little family he can be semi normal in!! Until is torn apart by his abusive adoptive father figure :D!!! I ABANDONED HIM IN THE MIDDLE OF THAT ARC AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

im sorry this got so long on this particular character none of the others will be so long i just miss him TSURUGI ILL CATCH UP FOR YOU!!!! Maybe he should have been no 1 hbjhbjh fucking sleeper agents am i right

4. Izaya Orihara from Durarara

Ah yes, the og queen bitch. Has my taste for villains ever recovered from Izaya? No. If your villain isn’t at least a bit like Izaya I’m not interested. Durarara was one of my first serious fandoms and Izaya was the first character I ever wrote for and I think you can explain me as a person if you consider Izaya was my all time fav at 13. I can’t really say anything about Izaya that hasn’t been said thousands of times before, I love how goofy and overperformative he can be, I love how there’s so much in him once you crack him open, I love how good of a villain he is for a messy story such as DRRR, puppeteer villains are really a league of their own. We need more puppeteering twinks, maybe then I’d be more into villains yaknow.

3. Hawks from Boku no Hero Academia 

To no ones surprise!Him! I’ve been drifting off from BNHA recently what from catching bad case of JJK what from just reading n watching more other stuff and honestly that’s probably good because I’ve been into BNHA for a couple of years now as my main fandom and I really could have used a break. Not to say I don’t like BNHA anymore tbh I think right now BNHA is the best it’s ever been just ya know, drifting. That being said my love for Hawks will never die, god what a good boy and we got his backstory too aaa ;-;. BNHA was just like Servamp, something I liked but didn’t really have a fav character in until this random support character strolled in and won my heart. God I love how much we got on Hawks. He’s completely different from his initial impression and his unrelenting strive to do good despite being thrown from one horrible situation to the next is just ;-; HES SUCH A GOOD BOY. He’s selfless to a fault, literally putting everyone before himself and putting himself down for not being able to achieve more than is humanly possible I’m just ;-; I WANT HIM TO BE HAPPY. He just makes my heart happy, he’s good and warm and hardworking and in a manga where trauma plays such a major role in so many characters it’s so good to see Hawks there, having been through three different types of hell and still coming out unnerving in his goodness. All I want for him is to have a good life and to one day be able to smile for real.

2. Gojo Satoru from Jujutsu Kaisen

Again no surprise since I’ve been so into jjk lately. Satoru is p high up rn cuz I’m mainly into JJK now but god knows where he will actually settle. He’s not even really my favorite character in the show, that goes to Inumaki, but this is a list of who I think about the most (tho all of these characters are either no 1 or no 2 for their shows) and boy my brother and foxy can tell you I’m constantly thinking about this bitch. I didn’t really care about him that much at the start but then I got to Hidden Inventory and OH BOY MUCH TO THINK ABOUT. Satoru is such a wonderfully complex character whos evolution you can clearly follow through the years. He’s under so much pressure as the strongest sorcerer to deal with everything and he has to operate in that system trying to change it for the better while at the same time trying to make sure his students arent sacrificed in the name of that change. He has a very goofy disposition but along side with Nanamin who’s a lot more explicit about it, it’s clear he cares about mental state of his students a whole lot. He knows this world is terrible and that the will come out of it with scars and that he can’t protect them from all of it, but he balances protecting and letting them grow as much as he can. They need to grow so jujutsu society can change after all, but they also need to be protected so they don’t fuckin die before that can happen. This is without all the many many opinions I have on Hidden Inventory and SatoSugu as a whole, how they influenced each other, how differently they reacted to their shared trauma (Funny how everyone on this list is fuckin traumatized) and what resulted from it. How their fucking love story is dramatic enough to be a Shakespeare play. Also I like it when he’s long and goofy ahahah

1. Chuuya Nakahara from Bungou Stray Dogs

Not to objectify men on main but I couldn’t choose a picture 

If there is ever a day when I don’t go feral over Chuuya I’ll probably be dead. He not only lives in my head rent free he owns the place.

HES SO UNDERUSED.

BSD has such a great setup with Chuuya, like he’s ex partners with the mentor of the main character who got betrayed and abandoned when the mentor left shared evil organization. Sounds like grounds for drama right? YOUD THINK SO. Like Chuuya and Dazai have such a great and interesting dynamic and you can feel how strained it is from the distance and betrayal and they bicker and fight as their defining relationship trait BUT there is such a strong underlying trust to all the fighting. These two trust each other with their whole lives and that hasn’t changed despite everything, despite how much time has passed and how much that trust had been tested. So you’d think he’d be an important character :) HES STUCK IN SUPPORT HONESTLY HES STUCK IN BACKGROUND UNLESS HES NEEDED TO DO SOMETHING COOL AAAAAA. Chuuya is literally one of a kind, I’ve never seen a character with such a good design and such an cool power and such an interesting relationship to one of the main characters and such a love and support from the fandom BE SO UTERLLY AND COMPLETLY WASTED. Even when we get Chuuya scraps they rarely build on relationship he has in canon but just throw in new random ones at him (tho that’s a broader problem of Kafka throwing new characters at the plot instead of developing the one he already has really). We get a hint of a cool fight with him? Completely cut out, More often then not it just feels like he is benched because he’s so damn strong there would just be no plot tension if he went in and broke some heads (which is also a problem with Satoru, guys stop writing op characters if you’ll just put em on the bus aaa). Anyway he’s completly and utterly wasted by the plot.

And it’s such a waste because he’s such a good character. Like he’s a member if the villain organization and is obviously by that very vicious and violent but also so empathetic and kind to people he considers his friends. He and Dazai have the brawn and brain thing going on and stg Chuuya is like the only brawn I can think of that is classier then their brain. Look at how this guy dressed, he’s high class gay, hat, choker, coat, gloves, he is bringing in the looks. I love how he can actually be completely calm and rational and put together but then put him with Dazai and it’s back to ‘we are 15 and we will scream out heads off at each other’, they are so childish. 

Anyway I love Chuuya he deserves to be treated better and I will never stop screaming about Chuuya ever

#anon #lucy rants #ask game #this one was the most fun so far aaa i like to geek out #sorry it took so long anon but i had lots of fun with it <3

[recurring-polynya]

Bleach Sword Beasts Arc Recap: Episode 256

I would not go so far as to claim that Bleach 256: Byakuya's Anger, Collapse of the Kuchiki Family is good, but it is dear to my heart, so I’m gonna review it. Also ~I can do screenshots agaaaaaain!~

Spoiler: At no point in this episode would I describe Byakuya as “angry”, and the Kuchiki family definitely does not collapse. Let’s carry on.

We open with a party for Squad 6 at Byakuya’s pad, with Renji and Rukia standing around, talking about what a mensch Byakuya is while Rukia stuffs her face with dango. This is my content. Then Renji’s squadmates haul him off because they are too nervous to talk to Byakuya by themselves. I screamed. I would watch a thousand hours of this.

As you might expect, Squad Six parties suck without Renji, so Rukia wanders off, complaining about how he left her in the lurch, when she hears a scream, and finds that the kitchen (?) is being attacked by some strange monsters.

In my continuing commitment to Squad 6/Kuchiki Manor minutia, we get to see some servants outfits! (attn: @kaickos​ ) Byakuya sure loves purple.

Rukia tries to fight the monsters, and realizes she’s not carrying her sword. Fortunately, Sode no Shirayuki and Senbonzakura show up to help out. Despite addressing each other formally, Sode no Shirayukia and Senbonzakura definitely exude a very strong have-made-out-at-a-boring-Kuchiki-party vibe. They immediately start trolling the hell out of Rukia until Byakuya shows up and narrows his eyes disapprovingly at them.

We skip to Squad 12, where Kurotsutchi explains the plot of the this arc: Apparently, while Muramasa was running around freeing zanpakutou, a lot of shitty Soul Reapers got killed by their own zanpakutou, who are now running around feral. Also, even if their shinigami was low-level, the so-called Sword Beasts have their full power capacity, i.e., as if they had achieved bankai. Sure. Whatever.

All I care about is the Squad 12 couch situation, which is dank. I feel like I’m gonna catch a disease just looking at these things. And jeez, the lighting. It’s important to note that Byakuya lets Rukia do all the talking in this scene. At first, I thought he might be sleeping with his eyes open again, but then my husband pointed out he was probably just holding his breath.

Enough of that! The Kuchiki sibs and their swords are strolling around town, the zanpakutou making big plans to kick names and take ass, while Byakuya searches for any excuse to be removed from this narrative.

If you read my fanfiction, you will know that I have a running gag of sorts where Renji is constantly shouting “Hey, Captain!” which Byakuya views as some sort of microagression (Renji never notices), and I stg, it happens at 9:16 of this episode: Renji jogs up yelling “TaiCHOOOOUUU!” in an extremely Renji way, and my heart literally exploded. Anyway, I’m pretty sure Byakuya secretly texted Renji like “plz show up with some sort of work excuse i cannot even with these two” and Renji delivered. Squad 6 ollies out, leaving Rukia to babysit these two drama queen zanpakutou.

You may think I am exaggerating, but Senbonzakura immediately suggests that they destroy some barracks to get the Sword Beasts’ attention. This plan is so stupid that Sode no Shirayuki’s suggestion that “maybe the Sword Beasts like parties” makes sense in comparison.

Ain’t no party like a Squad 10 party, because a Squad 10 party has comically oversized sake saucers. Are these some sort of real thing, or are they like when goofy TexMex places serve margaritas in hubcaps?

Captain Hitsugaya is McPissed about all of this. Rukia absolutely knows she got duped here, and makes some shame-faced excuses. Hitsugaya notes that he “received orders to let them do this” and I... have so many questions. Did Rukia have to submit a “party request”? Who approved this? Yamamoto??? I mean, if this were post-TYBWA, I can 100% see Kyouraku ordering Hitsugaya to throw a kegger.

Unsurprisingly, the plan does not work, and Senbonzakura gets black-out drunk. Rukia apologizes to Hitsugaya, who is like “it’s fine, my squad is all drunkards anyway.”

Sode no Shirayuki is extremely sorry at this point, because she sincerely thought this plan would work. So, just in case anyone out there thought Sode no Shirayuki has more brain cells than Zabimaru, you were wrong.

Rukia and Sode no Shirayuki have a nice talk about how Sode no Shirayuki feels like without Rukia, she is has no heart, she is just a weapon. She’s still feeling some residual guilt over the whole Muramasa incident. Rukia reassures her, over a moving montage of all their good times together stabbing shit. This idea is really interesting to me, actually-- that the shinigami provide their zanpakutou with purpose and direction, in return for the power they receive. I’ve sort of headcanoned this for a long time-- that zanpakutou are inherently selfish, caring mostly about the well-bearing of their shinigami, and must be driven by the shinigami toward accomplishing things. This was the whole reason Zangetsu didn’t want to give Ichigo the Final Getsuga when he was trying to defeat Aizen.

Anyhoo, Rukia and Sode no Shirayuki the Sword Beast shows up, and of course Rukia and Sode no Shirayuki defeat it with the power of friendship.

At the end of the episode, Rukia and Sode no Shirayuki debrief Kyouraku and Ukitake while Ukitake’s zanpakutou run around screaming in the background and I cannot emphasize enough how married these two fine gentlemen are.

That’s the end of the episode. I wonder if Rukia ever told Byakuya that his zanpakutou got blasted at a Squad 10 kegger.

#sword beasts arc #bleach filler #mamma mia here we go again #this episode slapped #i deeply appreciate byakuya's commitment to doing absolutely nothing

[stumacherstan]

Josh Washington x Reader Comfort Fics

A/N: i stg @slasherscream always makes me fucking feral with her writing. I’m big time piggyback riding.

We all know Josh deserved better than the shit end of the stick. Everyone abandoned him during his time of need and this hard time of struggle

Sure Sam stuck around but you were his best friend from the start, the twins even felt like sisters to you. You always went on trips with them.

This was a hard time for you so you and Josh both found comfort in each other. You were even aware of how unhinged Josh was becoming. It was a bit worrisome. However, you kept pushing him to therapy and become a better person.

You were in, just a tad bit, into the whole the grand scheme of getting everyone together again. You cut a lot of his plans short since things could obviously go wrong.

However when things went to shit, you backed him up and snapped at everyone. You knew he was in the wrong, and he took it out on everyone in the wrong way. However everyone needed to stick together.

Everyone stared at you in disbelief as you stood with Josh but Sam also backed you up. That was that was needed.

You supported Josh when everyone grumpily decided to work together. He seemed like he saw a ghost and all the words you were saying weren’t going through him.

You didn’t want to do a cliche and kiss him to wake him up. However it was all you could of in that moment. You just slowly kissed him and then pulled away.

“Josh, focus on me. It’s going to be okay. Everyone isn’t mad. Just count down from ten with me.”

Once he came to, all he could say was, “did you kiss me because you have feelings or to just snap me out of it?”

“Would both be a bad answer?”

“Okay lovebirds. Can we please focus on OUR survival.”

“Right, right.”

You had his back and he had yours like always. That’s how it always was, life and death too.

Once everything was okay and you all got out of it alive, you both talked about your feelings

Almost everyone cut you both off, but that was okay because you two had each other. That was all that mattered.

#josh deserved better #thats facts #i love him as well #im glad we’re bringing him back #josh washington #josh washington x reader #josh washington headcanons #josh washington imagine #until dawn #until dawn headcanons #until dawn imagine

[luci-cunt]

Hi @moonsandstarsaregay​ here’s just a list of perfect Geralt and Dandelion interactions in ONE (1) chapter [btw this is basically ep 2: the one with the Devil of Posada]

(this ended up being longer than I thought because they’re too iconic, I didn’t even make it through the whole chapter XDD maybe I’ll do a part two but I’m gonna get some food and let these dumbasses rest. 

But, spoiler: they’re literally so in love + feral/ insanely smart Jaskier is 100% canon)

[G+D leaving a pub where a bunch of people moaned about the galactic fuck-ton of monsters around them but then Geralt’s like, bye we’re leaving and Dandelion’s like ‘why?? monsters?? that’s your whole job??’]

"None of the creatures they mentioned exist.”

“You’re joking!” Dandelion spat a pip and threw the apple core at a patched mongrel [side note I have no idea what any of this sentince means]. “No, it’s impossible. I was watching them carefully, and I know people. They weren’t lying.”

“No,” the witcher agreed. “they weren’t lying, they firmly believed it all. Which doesn’t change the facts.”

The poet was silent for a while.

“None of those monsters... none? it can’t be. something of what they listed must be here. At least one! Admit it.”

“All right. I admit it. One does exist for sure.”

“Ha! What?”

“A bat.”

[You don’t even need context]

“...Eh, famous witcher? Haven’t you wondered why?”

“I have, famous poet. And I know why.”

[Riding on the road]

“Someone’s following us,” [Dandelion] said, excited. “In a cart!”

“Incredible,” scoffed the witcher without looking around. “In a cart? And I thought that the locals rode on bats.”

“Do you know what?” growled the troubadour. “The closer we get to the edge of the world, the sharper your wit. I dread to think what it will come too!”

[the afore mentioned cart catches up and suddenly the driver wants to talk, interrupting G+D bonding time]

“The gods be praised, noble sirs!”

“We, too,” replied Dandelion, familiar with the custom, “praise them.”

“If we want to,” murmured the witcher.

[and then later in the same scene]

“...I marked your expression and ‘twas nae strange to me. In a long time now I’ve nae heard such balderdash and lies.”

Dandelion laughed.

Geralt was looking at the peasant attentively, silently. 

[Still later the guy asks if they want to stop by his house cause they’re going the same way and Geralt’s like ‘hOw Do YoU kNoW wHeRe We’Er GoInG?’]

“As ‘cos ye have nae other way here, and yer horses’ noses be turned in that direction, not their butts.”

Dandelion laughed again. “What do you say to that, Geralt?”

“Nothing.”

[Dandelion talking about how gorgeous the land they’re traveling through is, Geralt teasing him like ‘oh so you know about agriculture?’ ‘Duh, poets know everything my dear fellow and agriculture is v important--’]

[Geralt] “you’ve exaggerated a bit with the [significance of agriculture in] entertainment and art.”

[Dandelion] “And booze, what’s that made of?”

“I get it.”

“Not very much, you don’t. Learn. Look at those purple flowers. They’re lupins.”

“They’s be vetch, to be true,” interrupted Nettly [the other carriage driver].

[Then Geralt zones out because now Nettly’s talking]

“The Valley of Flowers, that’s Dol Blathanna.” Dandelion nudged the witcher [...] “You paying attention?”

[They get to Nettly’s house and meet the village elder Dhun who want to hire Geralt]

The elder of the village nodded and cleared his throat. “Well, it be like this,” he said. “There be this field hereabouts–” 

Geralt kicked Dandelion–who was preparing to make a spiteful comment–under the table.

[Dhun’s explaining the situation more and then--]

“...stretches right up to the forest–”

“And what?” The poet couldn’t help himself. “What’s on that field there?”

“Well.” Dhun raised his head and scratched himself behind the ear. “Well, there be a deovel prowls there.”

“What?” snorted Dandelion. “A what?”

“I tell ye: a deovel.”

“What deovel?”

“What can he be? A deovel and that be it.”

“Devils don’t exist!”

“Don’t interrupt, Dandelion,” said Geralt in a calm voice. “And go on, honorable Dhun.” 

“I tell ye: it’s a deovel.”

“I heard you.” Geralt could be incredibly patient when he chose.

[Oh and, might I just add: this is Dandelion’s perspective–he’s the one pointing out how patient Geralt can be. I stg, TV!Geralt is quaking.

And, lmao, this whole scene feels like Dandelion was teasing Geralt for not wanting to deal with other company but now that there’s a job and Geralt’s attention is more on that he’s all pissy and that’s just hilarious]

[Dandelion goes on to interupt the story about 2 more times and Geralt tells him to be quiet both times and now he’s sulking]

Dandelion cackled again, then flicked a beer-drenched fly at a cat sleeping by the hearth. The cat opened one eye and glanced at the bard reproachfully. 

[Geralt takes the job even tho devils don’t exist, Dandelion is pissed, ‘why take the job if you know it doesn’t exist!?’]

“...I take it you haven’t abased yourself so as to get us bed board and lodging, have you?”

“Indeed,” Geralt grimaced. “It does look as if you know me a little, singer.”

“In that case, I don’t understand.”

“What is there to understand?”

“There’s no such thing as devils!” yelled the poet, shaking the cat from sleep once and for all. “No such thing! To the devil with it, devils don’t exist!”

“True.” Geralt smiled. “But, Dandelion, I could never resist the temptation of having a look at something that doesn’t exist.”

[alkjdf;klasdfjkdsafl LITERALLY k;aldsjflsd WHY ARE THEY LIKE THIS???]

[They finally manage to hunt down the devil and feral bard is 100% canon]

“Uk! Uk!” Barked the monster, stamping his hooves. “What do you want here? Leave or I’ll ram you down. Uk! Uk!”

“Has anyone ever kicked your arse, little goat?” Dandelion couldn’t stop himself. 

“Uk! Uk! Beeeee!” Bleated the goathorn in agreement, or denial, or simply bleating for the sake of it. 

“Shut up, Dandelion,” growled the witcher. “Not a word.”

“Blebleblebeeeeee!” The creature gurgled furiously, his lips parting wide to expose yellow horse-like teeth. “Uk! Uk! Bleubeeeeubleuuuubleeee!”

“Most certainly”–nodded Dandelion–“you can take the barrel-organ and bell when you go home–”

[this goes on for a while. btw yes, those are the noises the book describes the ‘devil’ making aksdjf;alk]

[then they have to run away because Geralt didn’t bring his sword and they get back to the house--]

“Well, well, Geralt.” Dandelion held a horseshoe he’d cooled in a bucket to his forehead. [you really can’t make this stuff up he’s such a disaster] “that’s not what I expected. A horned freak with a goatee like a shaggy billy goat, and he chased you away like some upstart. And I got it in the head. Look at that bump!”

“That’s the sixth time you’ve shown it to me. And it’s no more interesting than it was the first time.” 

“How charming. And I thought I’d be safe with you!”

[Then Nettly and Dhun give Geralt some old book that’s supposed to tell you how to deal with every monster ever]

He lay the book down on the table and turned its heavy wooden cover. “Take a loook at this, Dandelion.”

“the first Runes,” the bard worked out, peering over his shoulder, the horseshoe still pressed to his forehead. “The writing used before the modern alphabet. Still based on elfin runes and dwarves’ ideograms. A funny sentice construction, but that’s how they spoke then [...like a whole page of Dandelion being brilliant..]”

[^^^ that book is also unreadable but there’s a really old lady who has it almost completely memorized so Geralt flips through it to prove it and lands on this page--]

The etching showed a disheveled monstrosity with enormous eyes and even larger teeth, riding a horse. In its right hand, the monstrous being wielded a substantial sword, in its left, a bag of money. 

“A witchman,” mumbled the woman. “Called by some a witcher. To summon him is most dangerous , albeit one must; for when against the monster and vermin there be no aid, the witchman can contrive. But be careful one must be–”

“Enough,” muttered Geralt. “Enough, Grandma. Thank you.”

“No, no,” protested Dandelion with a malicious smile. “how does it go on? What a greatly interesting book! Go on, Granny, go on.”

“eee... But careful one must be to touch not the witchman, for thus the mange can one acquire. And lasses do from him hide away, for lustful the witchman is above all measure–”

“Quite correct, spot on,” laughed the poet.

[This moment--]

[Geralt] “...This time ‘tis grateful I’d be to heareth more, for too learn the ways and meanes ye did use to deal with him most curious am I.”

“Careful, Geralt,” chuckled Dandelion. “You’re starting to fall into their jargon. It’s an infectious mannerism.”

[And just over a page later--]

[Dandelion] “...ye furnished him with ammunition for two years, the fools ye be!”

“careful.” The witcher smiled. “You’re starting to fall into their jargon. It’s infectious.” 

#the witcher #the last wish #luci doesn't shut up #this is literally just me typing out the whole book XDDD #god I love this so much #THIS IS TOP TEIR DANDELION CONTENT! #geraskier #I guess #XDDD #this was actually soo much fun lmao #I love this book

[123abcdrawwithme]

all spg albums poorly described by me bc i can

album one: steam man band: michael reed voice: GUYS HOLY HECK LOOKIT MY ROBOT FRIEMDS THEIR SO COOL OHMA G AD clockwork vaudeville: now when you say you bought yourself a pickle- sound of tomorrow: the jons audible lenny face as he says “in the nude” on top of the universe 2009 ver.: RABBIT FUCKED A TOASTER AND UPGRADE KILLED THE SPINE THE GIRLS ARE OFF THE SHITS on top of the universe 2011 ver.: alternate timeline where the jon and rabbit kill the spine and deny him ice cream i am not alone: poor one out for upgrades 1 (one) song, shes trying her best ice cream parade: i don’t even know where to begin with this one brass goggles: LOCAL ROBOS ARE FEELING EMO SO THEY HAVE A SING ALONG out in the rain: splish splash they was havin’ a bash electricity is in my soul: okay but whomst the hell is that electronic voice who sings the “la la’s”? serious question who tf is it???? steam man band reprise: michael reed voice: GUYS MY COOL ROBO FRIENDS ARE GETTING AN ENCORE HOLY HECKIE blind minstrel’s ballad: ominous captain albert alexander: listen,,,, he beat spider hulk in an arm wrestling match,,,, hes really cool,,,,,, the 2¢ show: steamboat shenanigans: some say they sang so hard they really did make it to the moon and across the stars ;) one-way ticket: CHU CHU I LOVE U ju ju magic: jonathan giraffe what tHE FUCK ARE YOU SINGING ABOUT HONEY? ARE YOU OKAY? me and my baby (saturday night): the spines a hopeless romantic and he loves to treat his girl and his siblings support him little birdie: jon makes friends with a bird or some shit idfk rex marksley: the spines a hopeless romantic and sings about his cowboy crush and his siblings support him automatonic electronic harmonics: they want to feel cool,, let them feel cool,, prelude to a dream: hey michael i thought you were supposed to be the human friend whats all this about not being a human being?? mike? m-mike?? make believe: FUCK SOCIETY, TRANS RIGHTS BITCHES *EPIC KAZOO SOLO* honeybee: ah yes that one song we won’t ever let them forget bc were all emo scary world: the morse code says spoopy the suspender man: rabbit voice: yeah theres this guys who sold his soul or whatever how fucked up was that, anyway i want to wear a dress :3c that’ll be the way home: THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL THAT’LL the ballad of lily: oh boi we about to have another character song on this album airheart: character song 2 electric boogaloo circuitry: y’all good? mk iii: curtain raiser: beebop voice: STEVETHY SOMEONES TRYING TO PLAY THE ALBUM   steve voice: oh fuck steam powered giraffe: HEHE NAME DROP mecto amore: this is some rabbits in love again shit but with WHAMST hatch fever: hatchy is here and the album version does not capture how feral hatchworth performed this on stage a way into your heart: spg as a whole @ their fans: we love you all so much thank you for the support over the years :) <3 me through tears: bitch,,,,, <3 ghost grinder: rabbit and the boys on their way to the graveyard at 3 am to party with rabbits dead gf please explain: i stg everytime i hear hatchy sing “gum in my gears” i think he’s saying something else and i’m sure you can fill in the blank, but the thing that gets me is thats so on brand for him to say dsfdfg she said maybe: rabbit is just young old dumb and full of love these days isn’t she? go spine go: almost 6 minutes of hatchworth and rabbit being two year olds and poking fun at spine roller skate king: everyone sleeps on how good this song is wtf i’ll rust with you: me knowing full well this song is about rabbit outliving her gfs throughout the decades bc shes a robot: oh,, so thats why theres so many love songs by rabbit on this album,,, rabbit you good?? wired wrong: the spine you good?? fancy shoes: hATCHWORTH YOU GOOD??? steam powered giraffe reprise: we interrupt your regularly scheduled robot angst hours with that good weeb shit™ turn back the clock: okay back the robot angst bleak horizon: our lovelys saying goodbye saying they’ll be back to bring smiles on our faces soon as we close out to some ominous as fuck shit teasing vice quadrant the vice quadrant: the vice does tight: okay so the vice quadrants fucked up and the robots are very concerned by this on a crescendo: ominous foreshadowing thats so ominous i had to look up what this song meant lore wise bc i just thought it was the robots just dancing and having fun steamjunk: my dear sweet honey darling is traveling through space and I’M WORRIED ABOUT HIM starburner: low-key robo angst bc their worried about their souls being damned or some shit but its cute  progress and technology: david YOUR RANGE wink the satellite: wink voice: YOU WAS MY BABY MY FUCKIN CINNAMON APPLE burning in the stratosphere: oh fire fire: this is the most haunting shit i have no joke for this sky sharks: hoo boi the sky sharks certainly won’t be killing us all today, but climate change sure will daughter of space: PREBBY SPACE GODDESS HNNNGNNGNG star valley night: honeys you know you can just wait for it to be night time right? then you can go play in the star valley at night- commander cosmo: BITCH YOU GOOD? where is everyone?: THERE SHE IS MY BABY gg the giraffe: MY DARLIIIIINNGGG SING IT HONEY  the pulls: wink my darling y’all ok? soliton: corpse man and space goddess sing a really nerdy analogy about love and its gorgeous where i left you: wink seriously are you okay? over the moon: rabbits just done but shes gotta sing it and go all out with how done she is bc shes extra it’s cosmic: is the “alright!” rav?? also is this love song supposed to represent them causing more fuckshit and destroying the universe and just not realizing it bc their in love?? idfk man it bops hold me: whether from the perspective of holly or rabbit i weep openly at this song the speed of light: david: this is where the astronaut turns evil won’t tell you why tho ;) literally every lore buff: *listens to this song and tries to theorize wtf happened* rav to the rescue: local green space twink rescues his space bf more at 11 starlight starshine: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO the space giant: three steampunk robots fight a giant starbaby in guitar hero to save a satellites crush; a planet thats a huge apple i have zero jokes for this is already too absurd  oh no: oh OH OH? O H. OOOH OH??????????? o  h... oh no.... necrostar: evil pissrock possessed evil dead guy and is ready to cause fuckshit while the robots sing about how scared they are at the end super space blaster centi-asteroid invaderpedes 2: cute interactions with the robots! i hate this title tho whale song: wholesome shit to distract you from all the lore and foreshadowing at the end Music from steamworld heist:  automatonic electronic harmonics, on top of the universe, electricity is is my soul, honeybee, and brass goggles: me minding my own business playing steamworld heist: *walks into a bar where spine rabbit and hatchworth are performing one of these songs* me: HOOOOOGH heist ho!: yeah thats piper for ya starscrap: hi i’m in love for rabbit? prepare for boarding: GET IN BITCHES WE’RE GONNA OVER THROW THE PATRIARCHY  the red queen: capitalism? demolished. what we need are some heros: the spine projecting his love for cowboys onto the player characters the vast frontier: hatchworth: I’M A BAD BITCH YOU CAN’T KILL ME the stars: they made it lads they made it over the moon and across the stars.... also how’d they keep singing for that long aren’t they tired? quintessential: malfunction: wow i can’t believe spg ended transphobia i don’t have a name for it: love? i guess??gd fgdsghfdg blue portals: the idea of hatchworth going through the blue portals when i know they’re made out of blue matter is terrifying  overdrive: they want to seem cool please play along and pretend their green screen work is cool the ballad of delilah morreo: this came right the fuck out of nowhere but fuck its here now and its fantastic love world of love: wonder what other balboa park songs they’ll bring back, like never gonna give you up :) only human: i’d die for you hatchy salgexicon: they deadass wrote a song about their dnd campaign  sleep evil sleep: i guess we’re all evil BC WE KEEPING SLEEPING ON HOW GOOD THIS SONG IS TOO photographic memories: walter worker chelsea? come get ur mans- leopold expeditus: hatchworth: hey guys checkout my fursona dream machine: this song keeps me up at night with the endING I JUST WANT RABBIT TO BE HAPPY AND ARTSY BUT THE WAY IT ENDED WITH THE VICE QUADRANT RELATED TEASER MAKES ME THINK RABBIT PICKED UP A SATELLITE FREQUENCY FROM WINK ABOUT HOW NECROSTAR WILL KILL RAV IN THE FUTURE DEADASS I’M NERVOUS WHAT HAPPENED

#steam powered giraffe #spg #this took forever please just take it #not art