#there's just no sense that we're a connected community anymore

[peculiarreality]

So I feel like I should say something about the lack of actual content being posted on my blog lately.

See, I've been working on a lot of things. Fics, AUs (seeing that commercial with Taymour as a spy Did Things to me), even minor ideas for art. Sadly, most of these things barely last because I run out of steam. I've recently had the fortune to get into a Sea of Thieves art related group, though, and I've noticed that because of it, I'm starting to actually complete art project things related to pirates, and I think I know what I'm missing in most of my other works, the ones that have never seen the light of day.

Interaction and a sense of community.

Now, not necessarily likes or reblogs (though those help, especially reblogs with comments or tags! But as someone who tends to not reblog myself, for various reasons, I get why they might not, and people uncomfortable with reblogging are absolutely valid.) But a sense of... IDK, community, I guess? The Left 4 Dead community is shrinking, it seems, and Versus is full, last I heard, of toxic people who kick people for the crime of being new to the game mode or for dying in ways that are just plain unlucky. The Nellis subsection of the fandom is even smaller, and I'm sure it's decided, in new fans anyway, to make a home on TikTok like so many other fandoms. But there's no sense, to me, that we're an actual community. And IDK about anyone else, but this dumbass bi has discovered that maybe they're an introvert, but they like feeling like there's a community in their fandoms.

It sucks and it's demotivating to realize that I can make art for other fandoms no problem (hell, even Monkey Island, a game only a couple years younger than yours truly, has a fairly active, if small, community on both Reddit and Discord), but for one of my original fandoms, which is near and dear to my heart, I lose motivation because I know I'm not going to end up having conversations about my work most of the time. I'm not going to end up talking to someone who wants to know how I did something in SFM, or who did something I want to learn in SFM. I'm going to get a few likes, maybe a reblog with some tags... And while I appreciate it, while it sparks joy to see notes at all in this fandom, it's demotivating. Couple that with my recent return to Fallout 4 obsession (Jake from Sim Settlements, my beloved 🥺) and my new job, and I just don't feel like I've got time to make anything for the fandom anymore, because it feels like there's no one to share it with.

And I'd like to stress something.

While I like getting notes, this has nothing to do with funny, somewhat meaningless, digital numbers.

It has everything to do with the fact the Nellis community feels like it's dying out.

And it sucks. Because Nellis was one of my first fandoms. Because I've made friends in our fandom, but it still feels like we're scattered haphazardly.

It feels lonely.

And even though I'm a bit of a loner and an introvert, I don't like being lonely.

#pecs rants about: #fandom #fandom loneliness #left 4 dead 2 #nellis l4d2 #nick/ellis l4d2 #there's just no sense that we're a connected community anymore #and it pains me to say it

[cjgladback]

For the last several months I've been resisting the siren call of machining while enjoying the new-to-me channel Pask Makes, with its woodworking and tool production.

But yesterday I watched two videos from Adam Savage in a row, with all their semi-chaotic plotting, layout work, and winging it. I now desperately need access to a machine shop and I'm being so brave about it.

That said, I have just downloaded FreeCAD to get as close as I can digitally to that thought process without the metal shavings, blue stained fingertips, and sulfuric lubricant smell. Or at least as close as I can for free.

#started writing this post and had to pause for about an hour to search desperately for the name of my Intro to Machining Technology teacher #i'd thought of him and gotten to the point of being *pretty* sure he'd vanished from linkedin before #i confirmed he's definitely not there (or at least not the account that connected with mine) #and another person with his first name overwrote my memory of his last BUT this time i managed to find the right search terms #that pulled up his spot in the school's whitepages directory #so i emailed his school account knowing full well he probably doesn't have access anymore as an old adjunct #i certainly don't - it was almost ten years ago #but if he does or there's some email forwarding possible he's gotten a thank you message #because that was one of the classes i loved the most from my community college and tbh my whole school experience #anyway this isn't just impulsive yearning to machine #if I'm doing it right the project after next will have a lot of assets that parametric modeling would help #including vehicles if I'm brave which i need to be if I'm really using it as an environment artist portfolio piece #specifically they might require nurbs which would need me to download and practice with the silk add-on #which i think common sense dictates should happen after i understand how to use the vanilla toolsets #so gaining that familiarity might be what we're up to some stream soon #ramblings #tag you're writ

[scoobydoodean]

Actually I'm about to take this little exchange between Dean and Cas and Sam in the opening of 6.03 seriously, because why not? The conversation in the hotel has been an example used by deancrit casgirls for years to sell a story that Dean is always inconsiderate and demanding things of Cas.

Except Dean hadn't asked Cas for anything in a year as far as we know. He hadn't bothered him once. He hadn't asked him for anything. We know Dean was doing research on how to get Sam out of The Cage over the entire gap year (6.01) but we aren't told that Dean asked Cas to help him. As far as we know, he didn't "bother" Cas—much less demand his aid.

For many, that isn't necessarily the issue though. The issue is the lack of communication in of itself—the lack of "checking in". Setting aside that this isn't Dean's sole responsibility in the friendship and that Cas controls the means of communication between them, when Cas left at the end of 5.22, he spoke as if he was going off on his own solo adventure. Bolstered by a second resurrection, he planned to pursue his faith (and he and Dean clashed briefly over faith). Cas was excited by the idea of becoming "the new sheriff in town" up in heaven, and he didn't give the impression that he planned to maintain a relationship with Dean. He flew off without saying goodbye as if it didn't even occur to him that their connection was important and that parting deserved any sort of recognition, and I think that's how Dean received it—that Cas was at the very least, going away for a while and didn't care to be bothered.

At the same time, Cas didn't give the impression that he thought taking charge in heaven would be difficult. When we next see Cas a year later in 6.03, Cas echoes this sentiment, saying, "I expected more from my brothers". He thought he'd have more help from the other angels in creating (non-apocalyptic-leaning) order. To be honest, I don't think Cas or Dean expected Raphael to be a problem for Cas when they parted ways in 5.22. The Raphael that Dean and Cas had met in 5.03 was tired—barely past neutral in the apocalypse. In fact, Raphael didn't seem to actively take a role in making anything with the apocalypse happen. His only role seemed to be to guard The Prophet Chuck. He seemed like he just wanted to be left alone and outright said he didn't want to be in charge anymore.

"[God] ran off and disappeared. [He] left no instructions and a world to run. [...] We're tired. We just want it to be over. We just want...paradise."

I would guess that Raphael's attitude in 5.03 (and the fact that he never actually came after Cas between 5.03 and 5.22 as he threatened) left both Cas and Dean with the belief that Raphael was weak—beaten down by life, and unlikely to be a problem—that if someone came along and said they wanted the keys, he'd just say, "Whatever" and hand them over and ask to be left alone. Even if he'd fought, Cas hoped to organize the angels on his side first according to his reflection in 6.03, and he believed God would be on his side (even the fear of that possibility was enough to scare Zachariah). God brought Cas back to life twice after he was killed by an archangel—once in 5.01, and again in 5.22. This likely bolstered Cas's confidence as well, made him feel he could gain the favor of devout angels, and made Dean believe Cas would be safe.

What's more, the Cas that Dean is familiar with from season 4 to season 5 isn't shy about asking for help. All Cas did all of season 4 was come to Dean asking or telling or demanding Dean do things for the angels. He was never shy about it. He was nosy and lacked any sense that he might be bothering anybody or even intruding on personal space when he came wanting help with something. He was more likely to show up unannounced and threaten and guilt than he was to think he was being a burden or that he had to handle everything on his own (though he was certainly happy to handle certain things on his own when he thought it would be easiest not to consult with anyone in advance). In 5.03, Cas showed up out of the blue asking Dean to be his meatshield against Raphael. In 5.04, Dean had to explain the concept of sleep when Cas wanted to pick Dean up to help him with a search for The Colt. When Cas needed help, Dean helped—practically and sometimes also emotionally. There were no questions about putting Dean at risk—the mission always came first.

So Dean between 5.22 and 6.03 has no reason to believe Cas would not come to him if he was in need—emotionally or practically. He simply assumes Cas is busy in a healthy way—busy governing with his angel buddies—busy with other relationships and his faith.

When Cas arrives in 6.03, it's because, for the first time in a year, Dean prayed to see if Cas had any ideas on their case. It wasn't a big deal—but seemed like it might be up his alley. It wasn't a demanding request. Hell—maybe Dean sees being on a mission for the first time after a year as a good excuse to get in touch. However, he also finds out just now from Sam that Cas had ghosted Sam when Sam was resurrected and prayed over and over. Over an entire year, Cas never took the time to show. Even if they don't consider each other friends, Dean figures Sam is owed a response at some point over the course of a year after sacrificing his life for everybody.

So when Sam and Cas start squabbling about Cas suddenly appearing (it seems at first) just because Dean prayed instead of Sam, Dean picks Sam's side—and when he says, "When Sam calls, you answer", I don't think he's trying to give orders—I think he's trying to quickly end an unproductive squabble between two more-volatile-than-usual parties who are already prone to butt heads by addressing what he thinks is the root of the issue: Cas simply not grasping the basics of communication and human courtesy.

Dean's had to explain that it isn't okay to fly people places without their permission. He's had to explain that humans need time to eat and sleep and can't assist you at a moments notice at any time day or night. He's had to explain personal space. He's had to explain that watching people sleep is creepy. He's had to explain that showing up in people's rooms or bathrooms out of the blue is startling. This is just one more thing he feels he needs to explain based on his assumptions about Cas ghosting Sam—which are also built upon Cas's own claim—that he ghosted Sam for an entire year simply because he didn't have an answer to his question and for no other reason.

Cas then proceeds to make it clear that he didn't come because Dean called, but because of why Dean called. Cas is interested in the staff of Moses. Cas then proceeds to say "I need your help", and Sam and Dean help him instead of holding a grudge or demanding more explanations. As the case progresses, it becomes more and more clear that Cas isn't going to explain anything and he just keeps darting around and doing things like torturing a kid. So Dean finally demands to know exactly what's going on with Cas. Getting Cas to explain is really difficult—Cas doesn't want to. His responses are short and scattered—he doesn't want to take the time—he's still darting around while he talks.

When they finally get the picture that there's Apocalypse 2.0 brewing, Dean asks outright why Cas didn't ever tell them. The implication here is clear when you realize that up to this point, Dean knows Cas as someone who isn't shy about asking for help when he needs it.

Cas admits,

"I was ashamed. I expected more from my brothers."

He's still using Dean while he talks—literally yanking his wrist over to cut Dean's palm open and use his blood for a spell without asking.

#pk rewatches spn number ? #6.03 #season 6 #and cas is my best friend #raphael #cas and god #cas vs his family

[reimeichan]

I'm really starting to enjoy the stage of DID recovery I'm at. It's got a funkiness to it that I don't see others talk about all that much, where it's like... kinda hard to pinpoint what state my system is in at any point in time, but not distressingly so? And also not in a dissociative way like before. It's like, I'm able to feel all these bits of me flowing in and out of my consciousness and sense of identity and I lack any sort of solid definition of what this version of me wants to be or what my destination is. I'm just kinda going with the flow now instead of trying to steer us in any particular direction.

It's definitely a lot less stressful than it used to be and it feels like my brain has calmed down pretty significantly. It's less noisy in my head and I'm now realizing some of that was because there were parts of me who felt like they couldn't be heard before now don't feel the need to scream and bang on the walls to be noticed. And because we're less dissociated from each other, we can more immediately share thoughts and feelings instead of having to manually pass those things around to each other.

I've still got that ADHD buzz, but I'm now realizing the way I described it as being "50 trains of thoughts all at once" or "having 50 tabs open and all of them are playing different audio" no longer feels like it properly describes my experiences anymore. It's more like... I have a game running and that's the main thing I'm focusing on, but I also have a youtube video guide for something I'm trying to do in the game, while I'm also got notepad open to take notes, and another window open to crosscheck information. And maybe a couple random tabs open that are completely unrelated. Still got a lot of tabs and windows up, but they're more aligned to the same or similar purpose.

I do still have the different parts and alters and we still have new (as in unknown or undocumented) parts showing up pretty much daily, but they tend to get caught up to speed fairly quickly and even the ones who are very split off from the rest of the system don't feel as scary to handle (and feel less scared themselves) since we have such a strong support network and various other tools and resources at our disposal. I still feel like we're generally different and separate parts, but we also blend and fuse and influence each other in ways that feel a lot more fluid. Instead of having to purposefully communicate things with each other every time it's now a lot more instant and the hard barriers between each of us feel more and more arbitrary as the days go on. Kinda like looking at a map? Where you see the borders on the map, but at the end of the day you remove all of that and the landscape tells a different story and shows how all those "countries" are actually connected and one giant landmass. And those borders are still important to understand how they're there and why they exist, but it's not the whole story and can actually distract you from the bigger picture.

I dunno, I know I'm definitely in a transitional period of my healing and that's why things feel so vague and nebulous but I'm not complaining. If anything I'm pretty excited for what's to come.

#did #dissociative identity disorder #actually did #actuallydid #did osdd #osddid #cdd #by gray

[leonstamatis]

hello leon stamatis (my favorite stamatis)! i do not know anything about the state of blaseball right now, i think it was a randomly generated baseball-like a while back? my understanding was that most of the content was fan generated to begin with, being what it was and all that. is it too late to get into it? if not, i would love to hear some starter recs

what a coincidence, he is also my favorite stamatis! and blaseball is one of my favorite things. this, however, is a complicated question, so i'm gonna go ahead and apologize for what will surely be a much longer answer than you anticipated by asking this. sorry!

we're gonna start from the beginning. what is blaseball?

well, you're right. it's a randomly-generated baseball simulator. that's the general idea of it. there were 20-24 teams (sometimes more, depending on what else was happening), and they played games against each other. while it initially started as a basic baseball game -- with some absurd names and very simple mechanics -- it later evolved to include more complex mechanics, including player death, modifications to the stadiums, and other statuses that could impact and change gameplay at random (or under specific and nonsensical conditions).

blaseball started in late 2020 and had a sort of on/off cycle. during an on cycle, there would be games every hour on the hour for 99 hours over a week. then there would be a post-season to determine a champion, and the season would end. these on cycles were often divided into eras, and had larger plots and storylines forming connective tissue through the elections and special events.

during an off cycle, also known as a siesta, the devs would take some time to patch bugs, develop new features, and plan for the future. some of these siestas were a week or two; some were several months or over a year.

the unfortunate news here is that blaseball just recently... ended. the games won't be happening anymore, the site isn't active, and there's no new content coming down the pipe. the devs said it wasn't sustainable to keep doing it -- a thing that makes a lot of sense, because one thing blaseball certainly could be was overwhelming and time-consuming. and that's coming from me, as a fan who didn't have to actually do any of the coding or community maintenance.

however. onto the second part of your question. can you still get into blaseball even now that it's over?

[takes a deep breath.] YES. please do, in fact!

it's fair to say most of the content was fan-generated, i think, depending on what you define as "content." the games and the website were fairly minimalist; they gave us major events, but the characters were just names and a few lines of stats, so it's not like you're missing out on key character moments or quotes or anything with blaseball being done. all the identifying characteristics, the personality and appearance and emotional response? that's fans, baby!

this is one of the things that's cool about blaseball. i've heard it said that writing for the fandom is more in line with original fiction because so much of it is created by and dependent on the individual, as opposed to a centralized canon. which means a lot of the time, there's more effort in a fic to introduce you to someone -- something fanfic doesn't typically do! and because so much was happening in blaseball all the time, people do make an effort to explain events and canon occurrences either in author notes or in the story itself.

(unless, that is, it's a major event everyone was largely aware of. these were few and far between, but they were such a big deal that they make up a lot of the fic content. if you have questions about any of those events, i would recommend the blaseball wiki, where election results, modifications to specific players, and other significant canon events are recorded. there's lore there, too, but i can pretty much guarantee that whatever lore is there won't match up directly with any of the fic you read; blb authors tend to take the wiki and widely-accepted fanon lore more as a suggestion than as a rule.)

the long and the short of it is, you can absolutely still get involved. there are just under 3,000 fics, last time i checked, so it's not big enough that you'll be drowning. my honest recommendation is to pick a team based on who you vibe with -- the blaseball wiki has team overview pages, too -- and then see who is writing for that team. there are collections for a lot of them, and they'll focus on a specific set of characters most of the time depending on who had the most significance on the roster.

(my actual recommendation is to start with the earlier fics. the discipline era -- the first eleven seasons -- was a very tightly told story without a lot of bells and whistles. players had a normal season in season one, and then in season two everyone started dying, and then in season seven the fans messed with the mechanics and did a necromancy and the necromanced player started murdering people until we all banded together to defeat the god that was giving them the ability to do that. that's pretty easy to follow, especially compared to later eras when the entire point was adding as many new mechanics as possible or testing out new features. it got confusing, even for people keeping a close eye on all of it.)

if you find something that confuses you, that's okay! it might take some effort/research to understand these storylines, but the wiki is pretty good at explaining mechanics and events. just look up whatever is getting you and it should make some more sense. or you can use Before, an archival tool that lets you watch old games and fandom events in real time. (and if it still doesn't make sense... well. that's blaseball, baby! you kind of get used to rolling with nonsense, honestly.)

okay. that's all very long-winded, because of course it is. sorry, again. but... recommendations!

i think, often, that blaseball fic would be aided by the inclusion of a sort of "Weeb Ass Shit" scale. some of it is going to be very embedded in the nonsense of blaseball and hard to get through, especially if you're new to the team, specific player, or even blaseball in general.

hen fourteenfifteen and i had some friends who had never engaged with blaseball read a few fics of ours a couple months back as an experiment, and it shocked me to learn that the concept of an incineration -- a player being set on fire and killed by a "rogue" umpire, one of the earliest and most basic mechanics in the game -- was unfamiliar and a stopping point for the readers, because they'd never heard about that happening. and certainly not in such a nonchalant way. these kinds of terms are everywhere in blaseball fic, but if you can find the ones that focus more on a character than a game or a modification, then you've got a starting point and you can build out from there.

that being said, there's always going to be blaseball, so there are definitely still going to be moments where you end up scratching your head. it is simply impossible not to. if you're cool with that, here's a brief collection of some blaseball fics i would say have a lower blaseball-ass shit rating:

when winter turns to spring by waveridden, a love story between two co-captains from around season seven to season eight. (also, it's one of my favorite ships and it's my team. go flowers.) honestly, hayden does an excellent job of explaining everything in very simple and understandable ways. so if you want to just poke around on their page, you'll have an excellent time. there's a whole run of things from mid-2021 that is literally just character studies written for other people, and they're all great.

the things we take off for each other by bloodsweatspit is less about blaseball itself and more about one of the teams, the canada moist talkers. it looks at a handful of the key dynamics and is, in my opinion, one of the best fics for providing insight into a team and the people on it -- especially in so few words.

speaking of the moist talkers. it's hard to recommend just one of cyndakip's fics, but they all tend to exist in a similar timeline and universe and there's a lot of continuity that makes it easy to follow once you've gotten started. if you're looking for some very well-done, very lengthy character work, cynda does great things.

there's this fun trend that hit during the first lengthy break in blaseball colloquially known as the 12x100, or twelve scenes of 100 words. the idea is to give a series of short scenes that highlight a character or storyline without committing to a whole lengthy thing. i'd recommend checking out the 12x100 tag and clicking through a few to see what characters you like. (more specifically, babytriumphant's chicago, in brief series is a bunch of them specifically focused on the chicago firefighters team, and they're all lovely!)

another flowers fic. i'm not sorry. oxicleanmoron's it's my own damn fault is more recent, and set in the late expansion era. but it's not about blaseball. it's about a road trip. so you're in good hands if you want some fun character dynamics and minimal blaseball.

lift your head (and look out the window) by baliset is a nice little window into the baltimore crabs. marn also is one who does a really good job of explaining things from the beginning, so there are a few fics of hers i would recommend. but start with this one, and then maybe check out your sinking ship (is big enough for two) if you want to meet some more of her beloved little guys.

another sort of love story without the focus on game mechanics: you're at the party (you're not invited) by impernia. this one i include in part because i think it leans into some of the stranger aspects of blaseball lore without getting into the game itself; a lot of characters are strange or unusual in some way, and this fic conveys that beautifully.

take the bullet by waltztangocache is a great example of something you'll find a lot in this fandom, which is... character death stories! if there's one thing blaseball gave us a lot of fodder for, it's people dying and people grieving. if that's your thing, wonderful! you've found your people! hen does a great job showing the ripple effects that i would say are common in fanon lore -- esp on the firefighters -- regarding incinerations. i love this fic. it pains me.

i have written a lot of blaseball fic in my time, but i tend to think i fall pretty high on the blaseball-ass shit scale. there are others like me. however, if you do not mind me shilling for just a moment, i would recommend to you inside your blinding light. it's not about blaseball, as much. it's about a carpenter and a tree, and they fall in love. welcome to blaseball lore! it's fun here.

i... hope you were not overwhelmed by all of this. thank you for asking about this, and for being willing to dig deeper into this fandom and what it has to offer! i'm barely scratching the surface here, but all of the authors i've listed have plenty of fics worth reading, and there are tons of authors i love who i didn't have a specific pull from for this list but who i would nevertheless recommend once you're a little more familiar with how this fandom writes.

blaseball is over, but the fic's still around. and it's pretty fucking good fic, i'd say. <3

#thank you thank you!!! #ardentumbra #tam.ask #i am... so sorry #but like. yaaaaay long post #blaseball #blaseball fic rec #fic recs #long post // #VERY LONG POST...

[bramble-scramble]

It was a good attempt

Hey friends. I've had something eating away at me for a while now; I was going to give it a bit more time, but the anxiety around not talking about this is getting to me, so I'll just be direct.

I'm leaving tumblr (sort of).

Without being too melodramatic about this: I've had a lot of complicated thoughts about social media, fandom, the internet in general, being an artist/streamer online, and a bunch of related stuff over the past few years. It's always hard to sort out these thoughts properly, and even harder to talk about them, because I don't want anyone to attack me or assume I'm treating my personal experiences as universal, or belittling something that's important and meaningful to them. I will say I firmly believe that for many people, the modern internet is more harmful to mental health than we're all willing to admit. But I also know it's a great source of connection and friendship where I've met some of the people I love most. If I had a more solid black-and-white conviction or thesis about these complexities, I wouldn't be struggling so constantly to make sense of it all, and the internet's place in my life.

That said, the evidence of my own life points to the fact that the less "online" I am (at this point in my existence), the happier I am. That the remaining sources of self-loathing depression in my life are almost entirely triggered by the internet. That social media is a disaster for my OCD. For many months, I was hoping tumblr would be different. It's not. Realizing that the same old problems I have were just going to resurface here again was a painful process, one I kept denying.

I thought I'd be fine if I only checked in once or twice a day, but the more I do that, the more I find it hard to get myself to check in at all. Because when I do, I feel like I just can't keep up with everything anymore. I don't feel like a part of anything, I don't feel wanted or needed, and it just exacerbates my problems.

But I'm not going to disappear completely. I'll still pop in from time to time and answer any asks, and maybe post doodles. My art account @altermentality will still be active, when I have something worth posting.

You can still find me on twitter for now, and bluesky, but my presence of being truly "active" socially online will be limited to:

Discord- because I enjoy the few smaller, private-ish servers I'm in, and it's my hub for keeping in touch with people one-on-one.

Twitch - At this point in my life, I still greatly enjoy streaming, although my capacity to do it reliably varies. I also love the communities I'm in that I've developed with other streamers.

I'm altermentality on all the places mentioned above. If you'd like to keep in touch, please reach out.

My queue will run until it runs out.

It's been fun and I wish you all the best. Be well.

#bramble ramble

[olderthannetfic]

EOTWR is at heart asking for common decency and trying to appeal to the fandom community's sense of common good. Racism is an issue in fandom, let's be the good people we proclaim to be and rally behind a righteous cause. Yay!

Amazing how call out culture can turn a good thing into a shitshow.

We just went through a global pandemic that pretty much proved that common good stops being a priority when people feel inconvenienced or think their freedom is curtailed. I certainly fantasized about screaming out all my rage at any anti-masker I encountered. Would have felt amazing. Not gonna change minds that way though.

I don't understand what results they were expecting when taking this exact approach with their campaign. It's all call out culture language! The very thing that is making fandom a general nightmare for everyone right now! The very thing that watered social justice language down until you genuinely can't tell good actors from bad actors anymore.

How were people supposed to know different when their language, the language of the supporters and the language of their most infamous member are basically indistinguishable from the language of the bad actors.

They're tired, they're angry, they're just trying to enjoy fandom in peace. It's not their job to educate us, answer any questions or perform the emotional labour to handhold white fragile hands through confronting their internal biases.

Ok, then don't be an activist because that's kind of the job description.

The people EOTWR failed to connect with are just as tired, just as angry and have also never known peace in fandom.

They're not going to perform the emotional labour to check if this callout is genuine when it looks like a duck and quacks like a duck.

And they can just not reblog, simply not engage, just not react AT ALL because we're on the internet and block functions exist. And from what I have seen everyone who DID engage but had questions and concern was immediately suspect.

Perform more rage at them while not gaining enough support to make a blip on OTW's radar. Keep wondering why they feel in no hurry to even REPLY. They probably took one look at the Campaign and breathed a sigh of relief because THEY know their audience well enought to know exactly how this would go.

I don't get the circular logic here. They approached the community call out first, got the entirely expected backlash, doubled down on calling everybody out and then performed more outrage because the response proved what they were saying all along!!

So they KNEW they were asking a bunch of awful racists to implement anti-racist policies in an awful, racist organization and decided the best approach was... *gestures*

The counterarguments will be all about tone policing, respectability politics, etc.

But that's just a lot of noise from people who are embarassed that they fell flat on their faces with this. I'm sure it's also a lot of genuine disappointment that fellow fans seem to care about other fans welfare so little. I get that.

So I'll be on the lookout for another campaign that is willing to meet people where they're at and for arguments that actually speak to the target audience. I'll reblog that one.

--

I'm sure some people did feel that way...

But this kind of "failed" campaign also operates how sending your cult members door-to-door does: it reaffirms that Outsiders are all Bad People who are against them and sucks them in tighter to the group. If someone's looking to recruit loyal followers, this is exactly how to do it.

[reikunrei]

i honestly cannot get over how much this scene from tfs

reminds me of terry stuck in her chair in st2

especially how much her dress is reminiscent of the sheet(?) over henry's lap, and arms in the same pose on the arms of the chair (yes, i know henry is tied down and that's the logical place to do it, but still). even the cuffs on her sweater are visually similar to that of the straps tying henry down

it took me a minute to connect the visual back to terry, but with the general context of the scene in question (brenner talking to henry about the kids in the lab, how he's been behaving well enough that he's now allowed to meet them, etc.) i was immediately looking at it like "this looks like a woman just coming out of a rough pregnancy/delivery who was barred from seeing the kids due to her acting out of sorts/unhealthily." and maybe it's just because of all of henward's mother coding (shoutout to mothergate and the post of all time by james) but with all the sa coding throughout tfs, the weirdness with henry's supposed relation to the lab kids, etc... i definitely feel like it's a connection we're meant to make

and while i don't have the full context from that tfs scene yet, james and em have also said that henry is way out of it in that whole sequence (and you can really tell in the still of him looking down at where brenner is touching him. he looks exhausted). which only further reminds me of terry, not just in the sense of her being involved in hnl drug programs and mkultra, but also her general state after she's been zapped (not to mention how terry has no real way to communicate other than these flashes of memories using her/el's powers, much like how atp henry has no real way to communicate the truth to anyone, including the audience, so we have to form our own conclusions based on the fragmented evidence we're given, but anyway)

which, speaking of...

sure, a ball gag and a bite block/mouth guard aren't exactly the same thing, but they could be used for similar purposes (in this case, to prevent biting. in the case of terry, to keep her from biting her own tongue. for henry? perhaps the same case, but likely also to prevent biting others if his arms are also strapped down)

and with the question of henry's relation to the lab kids/el specifically, it brings me back to the idea that el and jane might not be the same person at all and it was more of a mixup/el misunderstanding what terry showed her, etc. (which has been talked about countless times before by multiple people but i can't find the posts atm rip im so sorry)

and so if we're meant to make a connection between henry and terry with these visuals, plus with the whole "henry was being kept away from the kids for misbehaving" and "terry was punished for trying to find her child after she was taken from her" ... i feel like it's stupid to not draw a line between the two of them and reach the conclusion that henry fathered (or mothered) at least some of the lab kids. and to then see terry fight so hard to get jane back... only to be shown 001 (some version of henry) doing everything he can to save el as well?

anyway i can't remember where i was going with this post anymore lol. long story short, i think this new visual from tfs is just one more nail in the mothergate coffin, and henry definitely was used to breed more powerful kids, and the close tie to terry just makes me think that he really and truly fathered el

#im so sorry if someone already posted about this i know we were chatting privately about it #but my brain is Goop and i cannot find if there were any posts made abt it #i say things #st the first shadow #tfs spoilers #terry ives #henry creel #stranger things

[entropy-sea-system]

OK OK impromptu rant but I need to get this out there as I still feel somewhat connected to the aro community-

I have been watching the tags, I've been talking the people in my local a-spec community and I think it amazes me just how incredible the relationships put forth by aro and aces are, while the communities just don't reflect any of it.

I've stopped identifying with the aroallo label because there was no sense of community associated with it. The a-spec spaces are made for aces only and the ace stuff in them is abhorrent. I am tired of people passing it off as repulsion, while still seeing people saying "hookers" are disgusting in a-spec tags. I'm tired of people saying PDA is bad. I'm tired of people acting like aros and aces can only be clueless cinnamon rolls. I'm tired of people being so so so stuck in their own perspective of the world they act like people in romantic relationships can't be happy. So on and so forth.

The concepts we have are passionating. They're the coolest ones I've been exposed to in queer communities. However, nobody thinks about them. Nobody speak about them. All we have is endless messages about how the world is so so confusing or hatred directed at sex and romance. I get that but I wish we went even a tiny bit past that really. It's a community filled with adults that feels so immature and I honestly think there is some sort of self infantilization going on. I don't like that I don't have symbols that aren't associated with uwu smol bean dragon lover stuff. It makes me sick and is why I don't identify with it anymore but it's genuinely sad to see because technically that's still the people who will relate to me the most.

It feels like people are always desperate to understand how the norm works and how they can best align with it instead of fully experiencing their identity. And that's an understandable thing to do but the community is just that with sex and romance negativity sprinkled on top of it.

I wish they were angrier. I wish they were more introspective. I wish they thought about breaking the norms more instead of headcannoning every female character without a love interest as aroace and talking about how gross sex is. I wish I felt like I can connect with the people who are supposed to be at least partly like me.

Anyway you're cool and I hope you're doing well! Sorry to drop all of this onto you but yeah I trust you with my ranty feels about the community.

We didn't really expect this ask but thank you for sending it!!

There are a lot of issues with the aspec community, especially online, (we have no experience with irl ones yet). And what you described here explains the issues with it quite well.

I feel like most of the aspec community ends up catering to mainly aces, and to a lesser extent aros, and slightly to apls, while other atertiary is hardly discussed (and agender ppl often just lump w gender stuff instead even though its aspec). I think the community is also rather divided, personally.

We're in some discord servers w mostly other apls and aros/run by other apl aros (often also romo aro) and they tend to overall be normal about aspec identities without being negative about attractions or actions or gatekeeping aspec labels. Currently we logged off discord a bit but we have in the past been in aro spaces that had many of the issues you mention , and still come across people being that way on tumblr.

I think there is a problem where some aros think that calling romance inherently toxic is somehow "activism" and deny that romance negativity exists, then claim that they "don't have to consider every culture ever" when people state that some cultures are romance negative and do harm people for engaging in romance.

They seem to think its "punching up" and some alloaros in particular try to justify it by acting like the united states is the only country that matters and citing sex negativity as a reason for romance negativity "not existing". When aces do this about sex its harmful, but thats not supposed to be a reason to deny that being romance negative is toxic and harmful to others even if their country doesn't persecute people for engaging in romance.

I also personally see a some aros hesitant to id with ace or acespec terms that technically fit them because of how bad the ace community has been about sex and anyone who isn't ace, as well as aces and aros generally forgetting about atertiary ppl. Some of them prefer terms like lightspec or such or allospec partly because of that.

It's understandable that some people feel a disconnect from labels like aro and ace as a result of how the communities tend to be tbh. I've had moments when I didn't want to id as aro because of this, and I consider myself both aro and alloro due to my arospec orientation.

Also being tertiary repulsed and being repulsed by sex repulsion (it just happens to repulse me a lot to read about even if not stated in a sex negative way), makes it a bit hard to be around other aspecs. I feel really disgusted and triggered when other aros talk about squishes and qprs and friendships, even if I think they should be able to talk about that. Which makes it hard to be around some other aros.

I also get what you mean about people trying to align with the existing norm. I'm seeing a rise in people maligning labels they don't understand and this attitude of "the only kind of weird thats fine is the kind of weird I am", which the aspec community has certainly not been immune to either.

I feel like for some reason most aspecs I see online, especially aros, are minors? Maybe because the aromantic label only really caught on after 2005 iirc so older people less likely to have heard of it? Im not a huge fan of how aspec tends to be infantilised either. I find issues with how some of the aro symbols are very derivative of ace symbols because we are not some extension of ace we're our own community. I can also see how ppl may find it too infantilising to have symbols like frogs and griffons etc.

Also yeah what is with people doing that about characters who are women or girls and express that they don't want to get married??? Or even just don't have a love interest. I understand if aroaces want more headcanoned rep or non-aspecs I guess idk want to fill some headcanon diversity quota without actually supporting aspecs but.

Not wanting marriage or not having a love interest is not inherently equal to not wanting romance and/or sex. I feel especially that people like to assume not wanting to have children means not wanting sex (which I find pretty reductive in that its acting like thats the only reason ppl have sex, especially as a sex favorable person who doesn't want kids). And all aspecs deserve more canon rep to begin with. I think I have a gripe with ppls aspec headcanons almost always being alloace or aroace. It's like they forget other aspecs like apls, alloaros, neu aros, non sam aros, atertiary, etc. even exist!

Additionally I think its partly because romance is emphasized more for female characters that even fans decide to make their interpretations about romance/a lack there of as if its the character's only personality trait. In my opinion its just as obsessive about romance if someone thinks all there is to a character is not engaging in it. I also see people act like they're solely worried a woman/girl character is going to fall for a man/boy character they hc as aro but not often the opposite like. Just say you see romance as gendered/feminine in some way and go I guess lol.

I also feel like mainly allistic non-aspecs do this but when ppl hc an autistic character as ace or aroace it feels infantilising if theres literally no other rationale behind their headcanon. I feel desexualised at times as an autistic and thats mostly bc ppl pick up on some kind of nd thing and they assumed I'm too "innocent" to like romance or sex, or because they view us as "unable to consent"(which can be true of some people if their neurodivergence affects their ability to consent to things even as an adult, but isn't universally true.) . I think some of this perception is also rooted in eugenics (due to people equating sex with having kids and viewing disability and/or neurodivergence as a tragedy and thinking its 'bad' for disabled and/or nd ppl to have kids).

So I don't really appreciate implications that someone is ace just by virtue of being autistic. I think its also unfair to autistic aros and aces because our neurodivergence can influence our orientation, but being autistic does not mean that makes someone inherently ace and/or aro.

My physical disability is relatively mild and less talked about (chronic pain and fatigue), and I don't reveal it to most ppl(ppl who dont live with me won't know I get exhausted from non-taxing to abled ppl activities, and chronic pain is not visible at all and we can't get mobility aids due to not being independent yet) so Im not fully aware how people view my apl and aro identities in that regard.

And there is definitely an issue with aspecs trying to enforce NEW norms. They cry about how people are forced into performing romance and sex to fit in but then turn around and tell people they need to love or have friends or family or pets in order to be a good person. It's also very harmful to aspecs bc some of us are loveless or atertiary etc. in ways that aros and aces apparently hate lol. A lot of aros in particular are very platonormative.

The aro community is also rather hostile to romo aros. There are still people who exclude romo aros from the aro label or act like we have to bend over backwards and acknowledge that we are "amatonormative oppressors" for liking romance or feeling some connection to it.

I think also the meme about putting a box away on a tall shelf away from a child is relevant here. The word amatonormative is constantly misused by a lot of aros. I've seen aros call alloromantic apls "amatonormative" and act like "amatonormative" means 'person who engages in romance'.

Its not a term abt engaging in romance or liking it. It's also not an excuse to pressure people to have or like friends either. I think aros should have actual discussions about amatonormativity that aren't just US-centric and about romance(wow do aros love to ignore that monogamy, non-queer, cis, etc. are social categories deemed more valuable under amatonormative societal norms), instead of using it to describe anyone they deem as interested in romance .

On that note, a lot of them use some examples of toxic relationships as reasons to call romance toxic and almost advocate for romance to never exist(which is especially disgusting to see for me, as in my country a lot romance negative conservative rhetoric is literally worded the same way). These people almost never acknowledge that other relationships like friendship can be toxic too.

I think some of these people believe in 'morality of repugnance' in that they think if its something they personally find repulsive in some way, that means its inherently immoral, which is not conducive to having unbiased views of the world, or critical thinking. I think a lot of ppl my age and younger are especially trying to do this because Ive lost count of how many I've seen be like "ewww thats gross/weird and so its wrong/immoral", and literally spouting conservative rhetoric while thinking they're politically liberal/leftists, perhaps with different wording but yeah. (I think that one tumblr post abt ppl in that age range being 'conservative on accident', especially in the united states- though that is concerning given the way ppl from other countries tend to absorb american opinions and such too much, describes this phenomenon)

I think some aros are also still so caught up in how much of a tragedy they think their aromanticism is, and I feel bad for them but thats not all there is to being aro and its a bit weird when ppl act like it is.

I think one of the best things about being aspec for me is feeling more like I can engage in and not engage in relationships (Im only favorable to sexual partnerships w no label other than 'sexual partner', and romance only w two partners as of now, and completely averse to all tertiary/nonrose. before I fully realised my aspec identities i pressured myself to have friends and felt like I'd be obligated to be favorable to nonsexual romance if someone wanted that with me, to 'be an ally to aces', even though it repulsed me. I also felt obligated to want qprs especially after realising Im aro. Realising Im atertiary helped me stop forcing myself to want nonrose relationships.)

Anyways that was a lot of rambling but probably most of my opinions on the aro and some extent aspec community.

#aspec #aro #also lol if any aspecs see this and disagree w me just block me I dont need the drama #aromantic #actually aromantic #platonormativity #aplatonic #actually aplatonic #alloaro #aroallo #asexual #ace #arospec #queer #aspec community #aro community #atertiary #actually atertiary #nonfriending apl #asks #entropy answers #sonia-wah-wah #apl

[angevinyaoiz]

saw Dune 2 (2une?), and since I don't have my dune blog anymore I'll post here, since blah blah this is my place for posting about Dynastic Weirdos. This is long but NO MAJOR SPOILERS, except about like, small detail things that aren't plot things but whatever

Tbh it was disappointing. It had all the correct elements to be liked but one thing grated on me the whole time...the Bad Dialogue and lack of Elevated Speech! Why the hell were all these characters saying stuff like "these guys" "we're ok" and "literally" it took me out of the fantastical world sOOO bad. Super bummer because what I loved about Dune 1 (D-uno?) As someone who went into it before reading or knowing anything was how much it didn't explain, how it let the visuals and the world unfold before you, and how serious and somber it was in a way that gave it a sense of scale and time.

I can only wonder if WB saw all the complaints and tweets about people being like "we didn't understand the first movie!!! It wasn't funny and quippy!!!" And decided to simplify it down so characters just SAY things really obviously and inelegantly. The writing has some competence in moving the story forward but there's no poetry or rhythm to the way characters say things, it's serving "Rings of Power" scriptwriting to me lmao. And it's not like any of the actors are bad? I've seen them do well in the previous movie and in other things, so wtf was going on with the direction. I know people complained Abt Villeneuve saying that whole thing about being more into visuals than dialogue but maybe he was right...there needed to be LESS WORDS. bc much of the words we had were NOT GOOD.

Positivity: the middle and latter part was where the movie picked up for me. The Harkonnen Freak Villain behavior was everything I could have wanted! Finally instead of EXPLAINING everything obviously we got to see a LOT of character building, for Feyd specifically in a very short amount of time. I know a lot of us complained about Bald Feyd-Rautha but Mr Elvis did a very good job. And we got Madame Fenring and weird scifi femdomming finally, which is Essential for the Duniverse! Wonderful fantastic no notes.

Of course, getting back to our heroes, I anticipated this 2 years ago sadly and it was true...the Fremen were badass but SWAGLESS. More Learned ppl have already written about the frustration with the erasure of the Arabic/North African cultural presence so I won't reiterate that here since I'm not super knowledgeable about the specifics of that but even as a casual watcher there was a weird emptiness to the way I feel the society was portrayed. There were individual good character moments, such as fun bantering among the Fedaykin etc, but for Pacing or Whatever they cut out the community aspects that served to make them feel more like well, a People rather than just either Grizzled Soldiers/ Religious Fundamentalists aka Marks/Panicked refugees. I have to guess this was ppl were like "we can't show a culture too cool and colorful and the part with Harrah (Jamis' widow) would feel too ORIENTALIST!!! But the result is something sadly very dry. At least in more older orientalist works, the interest comes from when the ~exotic~ stereotypes figures are able to have charming personalities and personalities and be known as people despite the cliches sometimes but this sadly wasn't even like that....

Jamis' funeral is a good example of this; in the Book, it's a moment where you first get a good look of what rituals are like in this world, and how people relate to each other and to the dead. In the movie, the funeral is looks more foreign and even a little creepy as the water is extracted from the body. There's not really a Personal or community connection aspect to it at all.

The ending was pretty good as it satisfied all the Cool Dune Moments I think we all wanted to see, and also did literally the end of The Godfather Part 1 Framing which was hee hee heh. Anyways, Messiah is MY favorite book of the series personally so curious how they get to that.

Maybe I've been too spoiled by Cool Historical Fiction lately? I've been watching too much of The Devil's Crown where action happens mostly off screen but the dynastic drama is written and acted so compellingly, the historical mindset and setting so alien and yet so human and relatable, it's frustrating to see when works try to do the opposite? Idk??? Dune books themselves is fun in how action is mostly an "offscreen, offstage"' thing.

*if ANYONE in the Universe is a quippy Bastard, it should be Leto II esp in God Emperor where he literally has nothing to do all day but quip all day to terrified acolytes

#Dune 2 #dune part 2 #dune 2024 #2une #Long post #My writing #Not really spoilers in this?

[thefirstknife]

I think they're quietly writing Hawthorne out of the game with how the past few years, the community treated her as the "Clan meme dialogue vendor" :(

Honestly, yeah, feels like she will remain just a vendor.

To be fair, Suraya's story is over for all intents and purposes, but on the other hand so was Amanda's. None of these characters HAVE to return and do things actively in the game anymore, but they CAN. We're not exactly losing any important plot threads if she's not in the game, but it's also a shame because she could be used as a side character the same way Amanda was!

Especially in Defiance. I honestly think that Suraya would've been a better choice rather than Amanda. Devrim is there so she can work alongside her dad! Marc is frequently mentions so there's a family story and they're all mortal humans so there's the whole danger they tried to convey with Amanda. Suraya is also much more closely connected to running heroic operations in the EDZ in the middle of a war; it's what she's famous for. Suraya going off in the field makes more sense than Amanda, the pilot, doing so.

And ultimately, while I don't want Suraya to die, Suraya dying and being hinted at becoming a Guardian makes more sense. Suraya was shown multiple times as being close to Guardian values. Zavala called her a Guardian in the Red War! And she asked to participate actively in Guardian Games, which Zavala allowed! Now that the season is over, obviously we didn't get Amanda to become a Guardian... for now. But the possibility exists for that to happen at some point, if they want to do it. It would, again, make more sense with Suraya. Especially if they're so desperate to remove her. The only issue is her status as a vendor.

There could be a lot of reasons to go with Amanda rather than bring back Suraya, a lot of which are about resources and technical problems so I understand. But I definitely don't understand not giving Suraya a nod in the lore this season. Truly odd.

#destiny 2 #suraya #ask #definitely a disappointing aspect of this season for me #i totally felt like at least one lore tab would happen for sure

[anti-endo-haven]

(To the fictive post) God yeah!! We're apprehensive to tell our partner for a couple reasons but a big one is one of our frequent fronters is a fictive from one of his hyperfixations, and he's worried he's not enough like his source. Obviously none of us care, he's here to do a job and he does it well, but he's dreading the "You're not very like your character, are you?"

As well as me (host), I'm an integration of a fictive, and I very much don't consider myself a fictive anymore, but I still hold alot of his characteristics and personality, and I already get alot of "You're so much like [character]! That's such a [character] thing to say!"

Yeah, the whole thing behind sources makes it really hard for systems to just let fictives be fictives, source connected or not, like source or not.

No one else should have an opinion on it because it will always boil down to your system and how your brain interspersed said source.

But I just hate how the community has made source such A Big Deal and things.

I don’t know if any of that made sense.

#anti endo #endos dni #did system #system #actually did #osddid #traumagenic system #endos not for you #did plural #actually traumagenic #did plurality #osdd plural #osdd plurality

[khaire-traveler]

Okay so a few days ago, I called Lord apollo and Lady aphrodite and I asked them to answer through a candle (I've never talked to them before) so I asked them, can I worship yall, and they weren't even there. They weren't there at all. I told them "please turn the candle off if I cant" and they didn't. Then I told them "give me a sign you're here" and there was nothing. I felt pretty ignored man 😭💀 so I've been looking for a God that fits me a bit better but apparently it's just not for me. I just don't know anymore. Like did they ignore me or whats going on here. I also did it separately. 2 a 3 times. They just didn't do anything.

Hey, Nonny!

It sounds like you're very distressed. I'm not sure if you've got a lot going on outside of this, but typically, when we're really distressed, it makes it much harder to sense energies and communicate with deities. I even find myself struggling with divination when I'm not feeling well mentally or emotionally. So, with that as a start, take time to ground yourself before addressing this problem. Sit with yourself, and focus on your breathing. In, pause, out, pause, etc. Try doing something that relaxes you or brings you comfort. Remind yourself that you're going to be ok.

Alright, next thing: how do you know for certain they weren't there? Personally, I've never met a single person who can confirm - with proof - 100% of the time whether or not a deity is present. I emphasize this because it sounds to me like you're assuming this information. Maybe the candles did not react to what you were saying, and that made you believe they weren't there, but it could be that they didn't want to communicate in that form, were busy, or even that you weren't interpreting the flame correctly (not trying to sound mean about that, but mistakes do happen). I promise that even if they didn't respond, that doesn't automatically mean they hate or dislike you. It doesn't mean they're ignoring you or that they've abandoned you. If you text a friend and they don't reply immediately, it's not because they suddenly don't want to talk to you anymore; they're probably busy, away from their device, eating dinner, or whatever else they may have going on.

My point here being that it seems you're getting stuck in your head with this issue. You seem pretty upset about this, but in all honesty, this kind of thing happens to every worshipper once in awhile. There was a period of time where I couldn't feel Apollo's presence for about a week. I was anxious and afraid that I did something wrong, but after that week, he was there as if nothing had happened. Through divination, I found out that he had been a bit busy and took a step back while he dealt with whatever needed his attention. I promise you that it's probably not as intense as you're thinking it is. I've genuinely even had situations where I've asked for signs and did not receive one, but when I communicated with the deity later, they gave me a direct answer to my inquiry.

Things do go wrong within our practices. We make mistakes, things don't turn out the way we expect them to, a deity seemingly doesn't answer a prayer, etc. But mishaps and disappointments happen in every aspect of life. Nothing is going to be 100% perfect, and that's ok. This applies to deity communication as well. Sometimes we need to try new forms of divination because one we thought was working isn't actually. Maybe you should try switching things up a bit. Cartomancy is a pretty common one I hear about, next to tarot. Try something new, and see if it helps.

I hope this gave you an answer to your situation. I'm sorry if anything came across as harsh; that was definitely not my intention, but it's really difficult to word things correctly over text. Tone is impossible to convey sometimes. Know that you have my support, Nonny, and know that it's going to be ok. If you truly don't feel a connection with Aphrodite or Apollo, you'll find a deity that you can connect better with. Take your time, and remember to ground yourself throughout the process. You're going to be ok, and it'll all work out. Take care, and have a good day/night. 🧡🫂

#anon asks #answered asks

[tbhimnoteasyonmyself]

DFF & the Contemporary Issue of Trends

Last time I came onto this tag I was grasping at the last droplet of hope I had for the ending to be good.

I decided to tell you all about the great seen of Tee's confrontation with Non's dead body.

Before that I tried to guess who White might be in the story and what was happening with Phee and how and why Tan was New.

And along the way I made polls and memes and I joined this fandom in appreciating what seemed to be another great story by BOC.

We've all dedicated so much time and care and love and talent and skill to contribute to this community, to make something great around something we were growing to love...

But now we're all left neck deep in the mud, as another series with great potential bites the dust in a terrible manner.

And I'm here as the ominous oracle of the death and peril yet to come, in good Greek Tragedy fashion, to tell you this was not the 1st time we've witnessed this and it shall not be the last. And all bc contemporary media have taken 1 thing to their heart and 1 thing only: engagement.

So let's take a step back.

What fuels people? What sticks with them?

How many times a day do you remember you love your loved ones in a week? Perhaps not many. But how many times do you remember the guy the big car crash you witnessed on your way home the week it happened? A lot, probably.

Why? Bc it's new, it's shocking and it probably fuels you with either fear or frustration.

The same can be said about contemporary trends. They're new, shocking and probably fuel a negative emotion in you. So they get talked about A LOT. All at once.

This is the reason why media is becoming what it is. It's realized all st once, tried to rush through plots and plots to be relevant all the while. Makes twists and twists and twists. And has something controversial to it. Bc this will make people talk. And talk will get more people to consume.

Until of course, the next more appalling thing happens and everyone moves on.

God, this is even true in the news. I mean... How many times do you hear about good projects? Or art? But hoe many times do you hear about murder?? No wonder we're growing desensitized to it. It's all we hear about all the time!!

DFF is just another case. Another series in a sea of them that tried to be shocking and play with expectations to keep people talking.

My question is, however: and now what? Now what?

Sure, we're all talking about it cause we're shocked and pissed. But adter the emotions settle and the curiosity to find out the fuck went wrong dies out, what happens?

Don't get me wrong, I love this fandom but the series itself? It'll mostly fade away. It's not something I want to create anything for anymore. I don't have care for it any longer bc why would I??? If no one bothered to mind writing something that even made sense, why should I care to love it??

And I feel like I'm not the only one!

This fandom will die. Like many other have. And what will the creators have achieved?

I never thought about The Untamed with too much fervor, for example. And most of us have not. But if I go into its tag here or on AO3, there's still stuff being made for it. And everyone once in a while, I'll think about it and I'll coke back to it and I'll cherish and nurture it for what it is. And the fandom's there. And sure rn I haven't interacted with that fandom in a bit. And I've been on DFF's tag nearly every day. But in a year, maybe even just a few months, I'll still be thinking and coming back to Xue Yang and Wei Ying and Jiang Cheng and Wen Qing... I won't be coming back to this mess, though. And in the end, it might not matter to anyone, but it matters to artists, doesn't it?

We make things because we are humans and we wish to connect with others. We wanna live forever in the things we live behind. But a story can't be told if there's no one to tell it to. You can't live forever in a void where no one awaits you.

So, in the end, we have consumed DFF, they have their money. But it will die and be buried together with all the people who have buzzed me while I was crossing the street or didn't held a door for me or were annoying to me on the bus. While other series, nourished with more love, will be there with me and many others, accumulating all the times we thought about them through the years, alive and well.

#it's like watching a child I raised falling into a drug addiction man #=/ #dff the series #dead friend forever #dff #dead friend forever the series

[south-of-heaven]

Damage Ctrl x fem reader

Reader never speaks like none has ever heard her say anything and she’s really shy and reserved,one of the members of damage Ctrl decide to approach her and doesn’t say anything,just sits next to her then the rest of damage control arrive and they start talking sometimes talking to the reader ,eventually after they are really close damage control goes up to reader asking to be in a relationship they don’t expect reader to answer but she says yes, then as the relationship progressses reader speaks to Bayley Iyo and Dakota more and eventually starts speaking to other people too (if that makes sense I feel like half of it is me waffling on)

Silence || Damage CTRL x Reader

Summary: Nobody has ever heard you speak, Iyo Sky makes it her mission to get close to you.

In the world of wrestling, where vibrant personalities and loud personas dominated, you had carved out your own unique niche – the silent enigma. Not a single word had ever passed your lips in front of your fellow wrestlers, an unintentional choice that shrouded you in an air of mystery. Your shyness and reserved nature became part of your character, captivating the curiosity of your colleagues.

Among them, Iyo Sky was particularly intrigued. Her bright and outgoing personality was a stark contrast to your quiet demeanor, and she saw it as a challenge to unravel the layers that hid your voice from the world. Day by day, she made it her mission to get to know you better, finding small ways to connect.

One day, as you sat alone in the catering area having lunch, Iyo decided to take a seat next to you. A friendly greeting left your lips sealed, but she didn't seem deterred. Minutes turned into moments, and Iyo's animated chatter began to feel like a comfortable backdrop.

Then, the unexpected happened. Bayley and Dakota joined the table, their vibrant presence contrasting against your silence. They exchanged stories and laughter, all the while making you feel welcomed and included, despite your lack of words. This repeated a few times, and slowly, you found yourself smiling along with them, sharing in their camaraderie.

One day, as you all sat together, Iyo, Bayley, and Dakota exchanged glances. They seemed to communicate silently before Dakota leaned forward. "Hey, you know, we've been thinking."

There was a pause, a beat of uncertainty. You tilted your head slightly, curious.

"We're together, as in a relationship," Dakota continued, a note of uncertainty in her voice. "And we've kind of realized that we'd love for you to be a part of it, too. But we totally get if you're not comfortable or if that's not your thing."

The air was heavy with the unspoken question, but what caught them off guard was the unexpected answer that escaped your lips, quiet yet clear. "I'd like that."

It was the first time anyone had heard your voice. The surprise on their faces was palpable – Iyo's eyes widened, Bayley's jaw dropped slightly, and Dakota's lips curved into a delighted smile.

From that point on, your journey began. As your relationship progressed, the three of them became a consistent presence in your life. Gradually, you found yourself growing more comfortable. The conversations started small, whispered words shared between the four of you. And as trust blossomed, your voice began to emerge, gradually gaining strength.

It wasn't just with Iyo, Bayley, and Dakota anymore. Slowly but surely, you extended your conversations to others in the arena, your comfort growing with each interaction. The wrestling world that had seemed so overwhelming and loud at first became a bit more familiar, a bit more your own.

The enigma that you had once embraced started to evolve, revealing a person with thoughts, emotions, and a voice. With Iyo, Bayley, and Dakota by your side, you discovered the power of not just being seen, but also being heard. And as your world expanded, you realized that the quietest voices could carry the most profound impact.

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[daisys-reality]

Your pick a piles are just *chef's kiss* 🤌 💖

As someone who practice divination techniques, how do you see the law of assumption and reality shifting? I just want to know your views on them <3

Oh dear anon, that is a truly interesting but very broad question.😅 First of all, thank you for the feedback regarding my PAC readings. It makes me happy to know you enjoy them.☺️🌸

general disclaimer: I'm not preaching absolute truths here! I'm just sharing my opinion and my personal perspective of these things. I'm not forcing anyone of you to agree or anything. My opinion often changes slightly too. So, I'm rather open for discussion and sharing each other's opinion! I just want to be clear about that. Also, as this feels quiet personal, I don’t know how long I will keep this on this blog.

[here the link to part two]

I'd like to say first that I've been into Divination (Tarot, oracle, Lenormand, astrology etc.) way longer than I've been into Reality Shifting and Law of Assumption. The latter two only since the beginning of 2022. Sure, I have heard of those expressions before 2022 but I couldn't really wrap my mind around those terms, I didn't know how to fit them into my belief system at that time. Oh, and even before Divination, I was also deep into subliminals and Law of Attraction like around 2015/16 but Law of Attraction is not what I follow anymore (obviously). Now that you have a little background, let's focus on your questions.

In regards to DIVINATION specifically:

-> I think I've talked about this somewhere before but in early times I focused on the communication with my 'spirit guides' and 'my high self' specifically but I don't really do this that way anymore. I still have my grounding and protection techniques (mainly through intentions and visualization) and stuff but I just try to connect to some open source (if that makes sense, idk how to explain it better) and ask for messages/advice. If I receive something because someone/something reaches out to me that's fine, if not, also fine. Things should never be forced ! Keeping a cool head at all times is advisable as well. Analyzing your environment, its atmosphere and energy also sometimes gives you clues. In my opinion, you have to be grounded and persistent in your boundaries in the way that you don't accept anything else than truth and/or the ideal advice for the respective person. Respect is very important as well - to yourself and every party involved! At the end of the day, it's all about your attitude and assumptions I guess. On a side note, just like reading for any other person you can connect with and read for people in other realities too (obviously including fictional 'characters' as well). There is nothing like 'great distance' or someone being too 'far away' to connect with on that dimension. However, there can be blockages (like for example, someone not wanting to connect or not wanting to share something with me as the reader or with the receiver of the message at the respective time).

Now, I will try to explain the main points of my belief regarding reality shifting & law of assumption in general (I don't think I need to additionally specify what those terms 'Reality Shifting' and 'Law of Assumption' stand for. So, I will get right into my personal perspective):

-> I see myself just as consciousness. And there is much more to myself than I'm currently aware of or rather more than I could probably grasp at this very moment. I'm currently aware of only a really small part of this 'consciousness'. I like the analogy that this life we have (the 'human body experience') is like a movie we watch in our mind (- and while we're on this topic, reality shifting in this case is kind of like switching the tv chaneI.) Though, I feel the need to say that this life (or rather the 3D) is still REAL !! There is no reason to get sad or whatever just because everything is a "movie". I sometimes see that some people in this community are scared of the idea that nothing is real or that everything is meaningless and they spiral into negativity and hopelessness. However, this is not necessarily the case because the human word "REAL" has a definition that is made by us humans specifically for this so called "movie" we're seeing and experiencing !! So, let's do some equations: We humans claim that Life/3D = REAL. The properties of this adjective 'REAL' = a movie-like experience. Life/3D = a movie-like experience while still being (=) REAL. [On a side note: DR experiences (while shifting) = REAL = movie-like experience as well] - I'm not sure if this made things more complicated , I really hope not. Oh well, let's continue... One of the main thoughts in the Law of Assumption community seems to be that 'I am the operant power(/'god') of everything and therefore, there is nothing outside of myself'. In contrast to this, I personally believe I am not 'alone' which brings me to my next aspect.

-> Gods/deities and other entities exist (in what dimensions tho idk). You've probably seen some people in this community working with deities. I don't really believe there is a super strict hierarchy with them in the sense that they are 'above us'. They are just more aware of their self [their existence and abilities] and have a broader perspective than us with our limited 'human body awareness'... I wouldn't go so far and say that they have an omniscient perspective. In fact, they (or most of them I guess) usually seem to notice/see our emotions (based on our aura/energy I suppose), they can communicate with us in more abstract ways and perceive more dimensions than us BUT they for example can't read our thoughts/feeling specifically at least from what I've seen and heard. Let's be real though, you don't need to 'belief' or worship them just because they exist. Most of them don't really have a need for interacting 'with us or our world' but some do and reach out to us but it depends on a few aspects...what entity it is, who you are and often what their respective mood is at the moment lol and more. I know that especially in the Law of Assumption community they often ask something like 'You believe in other gods even though you claim to be the god or operant power of your own reality? How can these things even coexist??' and they often respond with something like 'You can believe whatever you want and what you believe(/assume) to be true will manifest.' - which is kinda true! We do have great abilities and we're able to "exclude" things out of 'our world' if we don't want them in our life!! We ARE the operant power of our own worlds but I believe there is still something 'outside' of it and you decide whether to let it in or not. I for example find spirit and deity work very interesting and I love reading about other people's experiences but I personally don't practice such work. I might maybe someday but I currently see no need to increase my responsibilities (because you shouldn't take it lightly!) and I also usually feel very anxious when I feel other energies/entities around me. On a side note, I think that many more deities/entities exist than we know of and that those we 'know of' are not really how humans have characterized them. Well, in general, human scriptures shouldn't be taken too seriously anyways...not only those of mythology but also religious scriptures because we know humans usually have a limited capacity of understanding certain things and usually have certain (personal) intentions while writing - and I don't even wanna think of the influence of the society/government and of the general attitude that prevailed in the respective time period these scriptures where written in. Anyways, back to the topic...

-> Each of us have their own consciousness but we are all intertwined somehow. It's what I believe but I'm not sure how to explain this one exactly. I said above that other entities exist out of "our own worlds" (- here I mean everything that is included in our consciousness) but you and me and other 'humans' have their 'own worlds' all on the same level/dimension which overlap partly... well 'overlap' is maybe not the correct word but I don't think it is possible to correctly visualise it in a 3D-model way anyway, if you know what I mean. Perhaps 'interconnected' fits better... these consciousness (pl) are so interconnected that it is hardly possible to see the lines between each of them which makes it seem like one big collective consciousness - which I personally think is where the law of consciousness (or what it respective name is... non-dualism?) potentially relates to/stems from. But I haven't done that much research on "non-dualism" yet. So this is - of course - just my humble opinion.

-> Some add-ons regarding my attitude : There are so many more things in this world I don't know about yet. To be honest, I'm super duper curious and greedy to know more (everything lol) but on the other hand, I also believe that rushing (receiving an overwhelming amount of information) makes no sense and is counterproductive in a way? I personally decided to give myself the necessary time to process the information I receive and the information I find out myself on the way. I mean I'm human, I have my emotions (duh) and my phases in life where I feel down. Why burden or overwhelm myself (and my lil human mind🤧)? But the journey for more knowledge makes life here a little more exciting too in my opinion. I'm not exactly sure if that is the right expression or just something weird from my mother tongue but we say that 'we sometimes need time to grow on certain ideas/information' which basically means that after some time has passed, you can grasp certain ideas more easily and react less emotionally to them and see them from a more distant and clear point of view. In addition to that, I have never been an 'absolute thinker' type of person anyway. I always try to be receptive to change. The state of my mind or my current opinion are not absolute or set in stone, more so they are ever-changing and growing. Being open is the best way to flow with life's motions in my opinion.

So, yeah. My answer turned out a bit long, though why does it still feel kinda wishy-washy? Oh man... shame on me. Anyways, to all the people who took the time to read through this till the end, thank you🤍. I don't know if this completely answers your question, anon, but feel free to ask follow-up questions! Bye bye!!☺️🍀

#reality shifting #shifting #law of assumption #loassumption #shiftblr #void state #belief #deity #deities #t.asks #consciousness #manifesting