Did you paint every day when you were first learning? Is Pinterest a good spot to find references (in your opinion)? :0
I used to paint every day for a decade or so! Now I'm a little more seasoned, I don't think it's necessary to draw every day, I would even advise against it (just like with other difficult physical activities, taking a day or two off in a week helps making sure you're not overworking your body)... but a great deal of time spent painting should go into learning itself: mastering the control of your hand, studying the basics (anatomy, color theory, perspective and so on and so on...) and making sure you know your tools. Of course, that never feels much like painting, haha! I think if you spend five hours studying weekly, it doesn't really matter past that point.
I don't use Pinterest. Personally, I don't think it's courteous to copy pictures from other sites without asking for the OPs' permission.
Majority of referencing work can be done from life. Having a big mirror helps a lot. Of course, there are things that you won't have access to and there's no helping it, you'll have to look them up online!
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Admittedly I’m much more active/vocal on Twitter these days than tumblr but I wanted to go ahead and drop this set of thoughts here as well (although the last part tweet in the thread isn’t applicable as I do have asks open (though occasionally I disable anons because some people don’t know how to act))
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Super Monkey Ball: Banana Mania - Announcement Trailer
It’ll launch for PlayStation 5, Xbox Series X|S, PlayStation 4, Xbox One, Switch, and PC on October 5, 2021. The console versions will cost $39.99 and the PC version will cost $29.99.
The following two special editions will also be available:
20th Anniversary Edition – Includes an art book, reversible cover, collectable sleeve, and 10 cosmetic items.
Digital Deluxe Edition ($49.99) – Includes six additional classic character skins, three legendary console skins, 10 customizable items, and the classic soundtrack.
Super Monkey Ball: Banana Mania is a high-definition remaster of the original three Super Monkey Ball games: Super Monkey Ball, Super Monkey Ball 2, and Super Monkey Ball Deluxe. It includes over 300 recreated levels and mazes, 12 mini-games, and a colorful cast of characters.
Roll, tilt, and bounce through imaginative worlds as AiAi and his all-star cast of monkey friends race to thwart the nefarious schemes of evil monkey mad scientist Dr. Bad-Boon! No banana is safe in this epic new Monkey Ball adventure, featuring modern graphics and features, immersive comic book-style storytelling, four-player local coop, online challenges and leaderboards, and a barrel’s worth of new playable characters that rekindle the magic of the iconic originals.
It was late on a Saturday night when they had the idea. It was early Sunday morning when they confirmed it. Finally Sunday afternoon when their children had returned from their weekend of friends that they had to call it quits. It was Jacks idea to only work with this subject while the house was empty. Jazz and Danny already had empathy towards ghosts and if they found out their parents had started questioning, and reevaluating, their moral standing on ghosts.
For years there was no question in their minds that ghosts had no souls or the ability to feel pain, but after Phantom it was clear something was wrong with that idea. The ghost was just an anomaly at first so they overlooked it, but soon it became to much to ignore. They started seeing Phantoms oddities in the other ghosts. Its as if Phantoms studying extreme irregularities opened their eyes to help the realize maybe he some of this was so uncommon.
This weekend they had been studying with the idea that ghosts cant feel pain. Their original conclusion came all the way back to their college days. Then they didn't have most of the equipment they even needed to do the legitimate experiments. Now though, they have everything they need to do proper tests and the results greatly troubled them.
Ghost CAN feel pain. Sure most of them hardly feel anything at all, but if its what caused their death then the reaction is on the so much more intense. With this new information they started producing weapons that there's no way it could be someones cause of death. Though with some ghosts it was pretty easy to tell how they died though with Phantom they still hadn’t figured out what could have been the cause.
Overall thoughts on Nintendo’s E3 conference as a whole:
I’ve already voiced I hate the idea of a new Danganronpa game, so there’s that.
BOTW 2 looks so damn good and I am so hyped — I love BOTW
No Pokémon news??? No BDSP or Legends Arceus?? Like Pokémon is one of their main titles so it’s kinda odd to not have any news about it since the last time we got anything was (February?)
ALSO no Splatoon 3??? I am such as massive fan of Splatoon (and Pokémon) so I’m a tad disappointed not to hear anything about it
Dragon Ball games look pretty cool, we’ll probably end up getting them and playing them through. Dragon Ball Fighter Z (I was a Gotenks main of you were curious 😔🖐) was really fun! So I hope these games will be too
I don’t really have anything else to say since I don’t really care about the other franchises so much. Metroid 4 is neat? But yeah, that’s about it. Overall, got BOTW 2 footage so overall, I can die happy. Again though, really not liking DR Summer Camp but perhaps that is my own preference.
Ladybug: Kitty, I have to ask. How do you stay so positive?
Chat noir: In comparison to the hell hole that is my civillian life, fighting akuma no matter how dire is a welcome reprieve.
Ladybug:Chat... You have been killed several times.
Chat noir: Yes.
Ladybug: Are you okay?
Chat noir: (Still smiling) No!
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A. ＣＨＡＲＡＣＴＥＲ ＩＮＴＥＲＶＩＥＷ. [ repost, don’t reblog ]
name. Meiko Mochikoko
nickname. Mei, Meibun
age. mid to late twenties, depending on the timeline
species. Viera (Rava)
morality. Somewhere between chaotic good and neutral good
religion. considering everything she’s seen, she doesn’t really trust organized religion or actual deities
sins. greed / gluttony / sloth / lust / pride / envy / wrath
virtues. chastity / charity / diligence / humility / kindness / patience / justice
known languages. eorzean and whatever it is pirates speak
build. scrawny / bony / slender / fit / athletic / curvy / herculean / pudgy / average.
height. 6′2″/ 189cm
scars / birthmarks. she is covered in scars and doesn’t pay much mind to them; all over her forearms and hands there are tiny teeth scars from when she was a child, taking care of her feral brother. she’s fallen and scraped her knees countless times. then, as a Scion, she’s gained a bunch more, especially on her legs and shoulders.
notable features. her height, her bunny ears, the fact that she doesn’t wear much in the means of clothing --
abilities / powers. dancing (kriegstanz war dance), navigation/sailing, strong alcohol tolerance, the Echo
restrictions. nothing significant physically; her own mental state is her biggest restrictions (mybiggestenemyisme.mp3)
food. she will eat anything that isn’t spoiled.
drink. alcohol, barring that, Haruchefant’s hot chocolate
pizza topping. all the meants.
music genre. anything celtic/pirate metal/bardcore
book genre. when she does read? romance.
movie genre. action epics, especially superhero movies; or cheesy horror movies full of cliches
curse word. too many to name but fuck is the most frequent
scent (s). sea breeze
bottom or top. it’ll evolve as she grows more comfortable in the relationship and is ultimately a switch, although initially she’ll start more submissive a la nerves
sings in the shower. yes, sea shanties
likes puns. she’ll laugh as she screams in annoyance
tagged by. @eventide AND @eclipsewaxing - thank you both!!
tagging. @ferrumumbra @alisaie-leveilleur @akumeis @brightblessed @crownedveil (e’kusye!) @hienshun @enavance @empyria @infinitexmuses (maika) @kolak-magiya (melody) @lcstkey @primrose-morningdew @rothalion @sakuranosuke @silentsighs-ffxiv @azure-seadragon @viivyre (alisaie) @wolfsbrine && ANYONE ELSE i just tried to grab some alphabeticals
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evil giggle my vtubersona’s design sketch is almost done
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hi taja!! i'm great, how are you? loki's 2nd episode is coming out today and i'm really nervous, tho idk why heheheh it's my ✨intuition✨, ✨gut feeling✨ i guess. well, this week has been great, i met with my sister (we're cousins, but i call her my sister just because). i'm in another city rn, and i'm getting back home in like 4 days... and then i'll see my sister only NEXT YEAR, which means no mcu movies together 😭. we're both marvel fans and idk what i'll do without her, cuz i don't have marvel-friends back home... so what should i do now omg. wkth whom to WATCH movies? ugh BUT WE HAVE TO WATCH THOR 4 TOGETHER, because we need loki and thor to reunite. i hope we'll watch dr. strange too, but we'll see
the covid situation is great here, almost everything is open (just wear masks) but our people don't wear masks much and i'm so confused like ??? how is the situation pretty good and no one practically wears masks? i'm confused.
so.. anyways, how are you?
Phahahaha, I still have to watch it, but I think it's gonna be great!
And yes, call your cousin "sister", as you should queen! But that sucks, I'm sorry :(
Also, you're so lucky your sister likes marvel, I don't know anyone who even watched the movies.
I really hope you do watch it together, that would be awesome. And yes, I think the situation is getting better here too, but idk really, I don't follow anymore lol
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I just want to point out that I love the question mark next to Byakuya’s name like it’s some kind of surprise he’s even lurking around the island lmao — poor guy doesn’t strike me as a Summer Camp type.
If you want my uninformed hypothesis: I see that despite Tenko’s whole “degenerate male” thing she says, I think she could get along with Makoto because of his good nature. However, I honestly think she would see Byakuya as further proof that feeds into her “degenerate male” narrative (he’s divisive and bad-tempered — what else can I say ahaha,, still love him though) and Tenko somehow ropes him into the conversation (probably because he was just hanging around, I don’t know).
Knowing his bad temperament, he is probably going to try and bite back and he might just end up storming off like he does occasionally dndndjdj
But that’s just a theory... A Game Theory!!! Thanks for — um.. reading?
N e way, Byakuya PSA over, thanks for listening to my Ted Talk.
good morning. so every member in team bleck has a member that sort of ‘parallels’ the five member ensemble of the heroes and tippi. bleck parallels mario as the leader, mimi and peach are the girly girls, o’chunks and bowser are the muscle, and that leaves the last two-
(long post incoming)
the fact that 8-3 and 8-4 have luigi and dimentio paired off with eachother pretty much implies that he’s intended to be luigis parallel, and that nastasia and tippi are also parallels. not to be overly thorough again but i’m gonna spell out a lot of the ways both these parallels work
luigi and dimentio:
- have matching colour schemes (luigis inverted green and blue becomes purple and yellow, and vice versa)
- have the obvious parallels thanks to moments like in 6-1, 8-3 and 8-4 where dimentio and luigi/mr l have extended dialogues alone
- on the topic of mr l and dimentio, both of their major design traits are their masks and how one can’t be recognized with it on, and one’s true intentions can’t be recognized thanks to their mask always smiling
- carson mentions that dimentio was turned away once by the count before seeing that he had potential, much like luigi wasn’t allowed to come on adventures in pm64 until mario saw him handle himself in ttyd (this ones a bit of a stretch admittedly)
and just overall the fact that luigi and dimentio are the only remaining pair means they’re obvious parallels
tippi and nastasia:
- have mirroring but similar form transformations (tippi from human to flying creature, nastasia was implied to change from a flying creature to a humanoid)
- both are from blecks past, but only one of them was his love
- both of them sacrifice themselves in the name of love for the count (nastasias may have been platonic or familial), but only nastasia lives to see the end of the ordeal
- both are the one ‘non playable’ character in the group- you cant REALLY play as tippi and nastasia doesn’t get a boss fight
- pretty much the ‘brains’ of the group, the one that speaks on behalf of bleck/mario a lot of the time
HOWEVER. what if i told you i could also make the argument that THIS is also an equally valid interpretation.
now obviously the game pretty much confirms that luigi and dimentio are parallels through their fights but i could also argue that luigi/nastasia and tippi/dimentio have some parallels of their own, and why i wanna highlight this i’ll talk about later
tippi and dimentio:
- unlike the other parallels, tippi and dimentio are actively made so that dimentio can’t be tattled. he is literally the only miniboss or major npc like this (aside from maybe nastasia as she has no true overworld encounter)
- at the beginning of the game, both of them are the characters with the most mysterious pasts, as in little to no information is given (tippis gets given later, again i’ll come back to this)- dimentio is the only bar story that doesn’t help out much in terms of his past or lack thereof
- both of them have teleported a character to the safety of flipside in the events of the story (tippi in ch 4 and dimentio in the ch 2 interlude, though teleporting is part of his niche in general)
- have elements that may or may not hide a “true” face (is dimentio’s mask his face or is he just like that?)
- tippi and dimentio’s “moments” together are a bit fewer and far between compared to the others, like her strange out of place “i know you. you’re that...” and the fact that she’s the only one who survives dimentio’s ch 7 nuke (when he tells her directly he’s her enemy) and the fact that despite luigi being onscreen and PLENTY mouthy in his actual fight with dimentio, TIPPI is the one who talks back to you in dimentio’s optional game over
- this ones a bit of a stretch as it’s heavily based on theories that i don’t even believe myself but if you believe dimentio is the magicians son then both tippi and dimentio have a pseudo connection to pixls
luigi and nastasia:
- both are seen as the ‘right hand’ or ‘number two’ for their respective ‘number ones’ (mario and bleck) and generally play off of more subdued versions of their designs (nastasias glasses vs blecks monocle, her white clothes vs his beige cape and hat, her light blue vs his dark blue, luigis proportions being a bit more average compared to mario and a more subdued green colour scheme)
- both have a deep affection for bleck/mario and this is largely in part due to their pasts with them, where seeing their ability and kindness made them believe bleck/mario was truly brilliant (nastasias lines and backstory imply that she was around to see bleck as blumiere which would imply she knew him just as long or longer as tippi did), they also have spent more time by bleck/marios side than the others, comparatively
- both almost never have things on their own, their escapades are mostly ‘side stories’ (but they still DO happen: i’ll give tippi and nastasia the fact that they do hover around mario/bleck more than luigi hovers around mario BUT nastasia isn’t always around bleck, does her own thing, and is even in a meeting when bleck isnt vs tippi only ever leaving marios side when she’s forcibly removed)
- much like luigi and dimentio have their moments, nastasia and luigi also share moments (mostly in the first part of the game, keep it in mind): the most pivotal part of the direction luigi goes in this game is when he gets caught by nastasia, and nastasia is the one who tells him not to mess with the wedding
- in addition, many times throughout the game nastasia details to count bleck each minions defeat, often just telling him the messages they relay or punishing them herself, but specifically when it comes to mr. l’s disappearance, she says she’s the one at fault
- you could also make another design argument that mr l’s mask could also be a parallel to nastasias glasses as a large part of her character also comes from her glasses as they do the fact that mr l can’t be recognized- theyre her weapon (the red rims are also a bit of a gut punch when it comes to that)
- both of them wind up ‘taking count blecks place’ (as the final boss, and as the one to get hit by dimentio’s fatal blow) (interestingly this also puts them both out of commission for the final boss)
- this ones a big stretch but nastasia is seen openly sobbing at the end and luigi is the one of the four heroes who’s the most prone to tears (according to tv tropes at least)
so with all that being said, Why. why did i make this post. i’m sure i could draw comparisons to fuckin uhhh luigi and idk BONECHILL if i had the time on my hands. well the reason why is because i wanted to think about... what if we all looked at spm like this.
in the beginning, nastasia and luigi are in fact eachothers parallels, nastasias logic vs luigis emotion nastasia being the villain to defeat luigis hero yadda yadda yadda. but as the story goes on more and more of the luigi/dimentio parallel begins to happen. and this is because starting with chapter 5, dimentio begins to show his hand- to the heroes, but also to the audience. more of his plan is succeeding, and as count bleck grows more reluctant, this story becomes less and less about how to defeat him and more about how to stop the chaos heart from doing its thing.
we all know how that story goes though, how dimentio usurps the count and takes luigi with his little pizza hands. but i’m thinking that luigis parallels, luigis villains are really supposed to represent the arc 1 villain and the arc 2 villain- both nastasia and dimentio are the ones who are trying to make the man in green choose the dark prognosticus as the true prophecy, it’s just that as the story goes on, dimentio is the one who seizes control of the story. even to the effect that he’ll shift the very structure of the team around so that HE will do battle with luigi. so that HE is the one who is the obvious representative of the ideal host for the chaos heart.
cos who ELSE would it be, right??? :o)
*and here comes the obligatory disclaimer that obviously i’m not trying to say that THIS is concrete 100% what the writers meant. i just think this is an interesting interpretation i’d like to explore
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Is gatekeeping inherently bad, or only negative in some contexts and beneficial in others?
I assume that you mean gatekeeping communities and terms, not "gatekeeping" as in a function some alters perform to control switching, access to memories, or access to other dissociated materials!
I think that gatekeeping communities is vital to keeping communities safe, healthy, and productive. For example, communities for minors shouldn't allow in adults, and communities that discuss adult content shouldn't allow in minors. On many survivor forums, support-people -- such as partners, friends, or therapists -- may have access to some subforums but not those where sensitive discussions occur in order to ensure that the survivors feel comfortable speaking freely and aren't worried about being watched and judged by non-survivors. Religious abuse survivors often have their own sections to talk so that they're not at risk of being lectured at by individuals who are religious and may not understand how religion can be used to cause harm. Individuals with DID/OSDD-1 may also have their own subforums both in order to provide a safe space for alters to talk and to ensure that the rest of the forum is a safe space for those without DID/OSDD-1 who may be confused by open discussion of parts in unrelated threads. Many communities, not just survivor communities, have subsections for women, LGBT people, racial/ethnic minorities, or other vulnerable groups, and these subsections rarely allow in allies or may only allow allies to access a subfolder within the wider space. All of these are normal, help to protect vulnerable people, and can model healthy boundaries about sharing information.
Outside of moderated spaces, gatekeeping terms and concepts can be more challenging or even impossible. However, I personally am still a firm believer in protecting the meanings behind important words and concepts. Language is an important way to communicate information, find others with similar experiences, and come to new realizations. This is especially true online, where other cues such as body language or context may not be possible or easy to obtain. Recklessly changing language can make it harder for others to understand you, harder for others to respond in a productive manner, and harder for observers to understand the conversation. Constantly changing terminology can create "in-groups" of those who know the lingo and "out-groups" of those who don't, and those in the "out-groups" can easily feel shut-out, isolated, or even judged or shamed for their lack of knowledge. Using language in very non-standard or inconsistent ways can also create access barriers to non-native speakers and those with language processing difficulties.
Additionally, as a researcher, precise language is very important to me! While I don't expect everyone to have an exact understanding of how every word is used by professionals, it's very frustrating to me to see important terms widened until anyone can claim them or identify into them for any reason. When a term loses boundaries, it loses meaning, and when it loses meaning, it loses any possible usefulness. "Trauma" is one such term that in some spaces has lost all meaning. By definition, "trauma" cannot refer to stressors that are within the range of theoretically normal or acceptable experiences for a culture, and it cannot be divorced from a perceived threat of serious harm. For example, moving is something that most children experience at least once, is not considered harmful to children, and so is not considered potentially traumatic no matter how stressful the child found it. In contrast, sexual assault is something that many women experience, but it is considered potentially traumatic because it's a violation of personal autonomy and has a high potential to cause long-term harm. Emotional and verbal abuse are also often considered traumatic, especially for children, because they can carry a covert or overt threat of physical harm or denial of necessary resources or support.
If I led a study on traumatic experiences, allowed anyone to contribute any answers about their history of trauma, and did nothing to cull answers that don't match DSM-5 or ICD-11 definitions of trauma, my data would be meaningless. If I applied for a grant to prevent childhood trauma but actually meant "any slightly negative childhood experiences," I'd be at high risk of targeting childhood stressors that are easier to fix but less impactful overall instead of addressing major but difficult to improve traumas such as child maltreatment, exposure to community violence, peer aggression, or deprivation. If a support group was formed for survivors of childhood trauma but had no way of defining this term, those who had experienced actual threatening events would likely feel further alienated and isolated if the group was primarily composed of individuals who had experienced only routine stressors or dedicated a large amount of time and focus to routine stressors. If clinicians who call themselves "trauma informed" actually mean that they can help with normal work or family stressors but have no knowledge of or experience treating actual traumas, they can do serious harm to clients who try to see them to process trauma and obtain help with posttraumatic stress.
While discussions online might carry less weight, erasing all boundaries between trauma and normal stressors still does no favors for trauma survivors. To the contrary, it removes useful language from survivors. It makes it difficult for survivors to understand their own experiences, find others with similar experiences, and communicate with support-people and healthcare providers. Discussions of common outcomes of trauma would in general be impossible, and there would be no benefit to survivors understanding their mental health struggles as posttraumatic. Non-survivors would also be even less likely to understand, support, or accommodate survivors if they view trauma as entirely subjective and something that they could theoretically experience on a weekly basis as part of routine desk work!
The same negative outcomes are possible when labels for mental health symptoms are misapplied, such as when "dissociation" is misapplied to any situation where someone is slightly inattentive or "intrusive thoughts" is misapplied to any random or unproductive thoughts (as has been the case in several viral Tumblr posts). Additionally, watering down these terms from their original meanings can lead to feelings of isolation or shame when people who actually have these experiences notice that the majority of people using the terms are referring to much milder, healthier, and less atypical experiences. People who have become used to labelling their own typical experiences with mental health labels may also be more likely to judge or shame those with the actual symptoms because, well, the healthy individual doesn't struggle with those weird and scary symptoms, so why should the actually mentally ill individual!
Finally, I’ll address what you’re probably actually asking, which is about non-traumagenic multiplicity. This is actually the hardest angle to address because it’s not straightforward or clear-cut. Survivor spaces should be for survivors regardless of their multiplicity or perceived system origin, but non-traumagenic systems probably shouldn’t be talking about their system in these spaces lest they cause confusion or offense. DID/OSDD-1 spaces obviously are not meant for other system types. However, having some spaces be shared can be helpful. For example, even some DID/OSDD-1 systems perceive a spiritual origin or influence to some or all of their parts, and they may find this helpful to discuss with individuals who view their entire system as spiritual. Additionally, it’s not uncommon for those who claim that their systems are endogenic to eventually realize that they’re actually traumagenic, but this realization is much less likely to occur if they’re shut out from all DID/OSDD-1 spaces. Finally, some systems like talking to other systems regardless of their perceived origin.
On the other hand, it has to be acknowledged that shared spaces do have some risks. For example, non-DID/OSDD-1 systems may inadvertently say very offensive or hurtful things, such as implying that alters are lesser because they’re not separate people or because they originate from trauma. They may be rude about people who attend therapy or downplay how important therapy is for those with DID/OSDD-1. They may also talk about traumatic “memories” of past lives, fictives, walk-ins, or similar in a way that’s uncomfortable at best for those who have actually experienced the trauma in question. There may also be a risk of harm if non-DID/OSDD-1 systems don’t buy into the need to take full responsibility across the system or to acknowledge that the material reality of the body holds much more weight than the identities of “headmates” (e.g., if a White system with a Black headmate doesn’t acknowledge that none of them have the right to talk over Black people or intrude on Black spaces). Obviously, there can be tension if a DID/OSDD-1 system doesn’t believe that other origins of multiplicity are possible (clearly if they push this belief on others, but also sometimes if they’re respectful but others can’t tolerate their difference in belief; this may also be the case for non-traumagenic systems who doubt some multiplicity origins, such as an endogenic system not believing in spiritual origins or a spiritual system believing that all psychological multiplicity has to be DID/OSDD-1). Finally, there might also be a bleed-over of concepts that really shouldn’t be cross-applied.
There are some concepts that are strictly relevant to traumagenic multiplicity, such as structural dissociation, trauma-holder parts, and abuser introjects. It would be hurtful and inappropriate for these to be misapplied by systems who haven’t experienced childhood trauma. On the other hand, some concepts are strictly relevant to non-traumagenic claims, like system-hopping, walk-ins, headmates dying, or anything else that isn’t possible for dissociated parts of the self. These concepts can do a lot of damage when they’re internalized by DID/OSDD-1 systems, and fear of getting confused about which concepts are possible or not in DID/OSDD-1 is a reason why many people with DID/OSDD-1 urge newly diagnosed individuals to avoid shared spaces. That said, some concepts are unfairly blamed on having originated in endogenic spaces -- such as alters being literally separate people -- when they actually originated in DID/OSDD-1 spaces, so it’s not as if avoiding shared spaces is all that’s needed to be protected from misinformation.
Terminology is another sticky area. Some terms really shouldn’t be used by anyone without DID/OSDD-1, including clinical language such as “alters.” It should go without saying, but this also includes DID/OSDD-1; it’s extremely offensive for someone not claiming to have experienced childhood trauma to insist that the DSM-5 or ICD-11 allow them to claim to have DID/OSDD-1. Other terms only apply to non-traumagenic systems and don’t make sense to apply to DID/OSDD-1 (unless someone is claiming a mixed origin), such as “walk-ins.” On the other hand, some terms would seem not to apply to DID/OSDD-1 or already have an equivalent in DID/OSDD-1, but they were still appropriated, with or without being redefined first. For example, “fictive” and “factive” were originally the endogenic mirror of “introject” in DID/OSDD-1, but these terms somehow became so commonly used in certain corners of the internet by people claiming DID/OSDD-1 that many systems now don’t realize their origin. The same is true for “median,” which was originally the endogenic answer to “midcontinuum.”
That said, some terms are shared between systems of all types, including “system”! While “system” can be used in clinical contexts, it’s also a term that’s used in a wide-variety of non-mental health related contexts (e.g., computer operating system or solar system), making it something that anyone could independently apply to themself. It’s also used for contexts such as internal family systems, meaning that people without significantly dissociated selves are already using it to refer to parts of their selves with professional approval. Terms like “headspace,” “internal world,” or “gatekeeper” (as in the alter type!) may be appealing and useful for non-traumagenic systems. Similarly, some people with DID/OSDD-1 will refer to their alters as “headmates” despite this generally being associated with endogenic systems.
tl;dr Gatekeeping spaces is important to keeping spaces healthy and safe for vulnerable individuals. It’s also an example of normal and appropriate boundaries. Gatekeeping terms can be more challenging but is important to ensure that terms retain helpful meanings. If terms can be applied to whatever situation the speaker feels like, the terms don’t actually communicate anything any more. Sometimes, community overlap can cause some uncertainty about what spaces and terms are okay to share. There are a lot of things that need to be addressed on a case-by-case basis when determining what’s exclusive to or okay to share between DID/OSDD-1 and non-traumagenic systems.
I hope that this helps,
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Alrighty lovely peeps, here is the final part of my thoughts on Victor’s infamous ‘love-triangle’ journey in episodes 9-10 (and why the undercurrent is full of Benji).
MOURNING A LIFE WITH A LOVER ALMOST LOST: HURT AND ANGER
Our first understanding of how Victor is holding up in episode ten is through the visual of the wedding invitation he is holding. It’s a very strong visual with so many connotations -- weddings are romantic, full of love and celebration, and most importantly a lifelong commitment to a loved one. That is Victor’s dream too and one he was working hard on (not necessarily a marriage but certainly a life-long commitment). But the person he wants to work on that commitment with isn’t talking to him and quite likely easing them into a separation.
What is even more of a mockery is the envelope -- Victor and Benji’s names are printed together in gorgeous cursive, like they are a team, a unit, a done deal. It’s almost like how their own wedding invitation might look, if they ever wanted to have one. But it is a dream that only exists on a piece of paper right now.
It is clear in this scene that Victor is feeling a mix of three things: sad, hurt, and anger. The anger is quite clear when he puts the invitation aside with the shake of his head. He’s angry that Benji ditched the wedding commitment last minute, yes, but no doubt a lot of that anger is born from how hurt he is that Benji is seemingly giving up on them. A glance at his unanswered message to Simon where he says something similar confirms it.
This anger is channeled into a practical matter -- the etiquette faux pas of being a last-minute wedding guest now messing up catering. Victor needs to find a substitute plus one (which to be honest feels like a plot device but shh). Enter Rahim, sans Pilal. Once again, Rahim is a welcome friend that Victor knows he will have fun with, be comfortable around, and more importantly experience a nice distraction with again.
Fast-forward to the next key scene, for me: Victor’s fascinating response to hearing Harold’s and Veronica’s wedding vows. Which brings me to:
VICTOR’S DESPERATION FOR SOMEONE TO LOVE HIM ENOUGH TO FIGHT / BUILDING A SAFETY NET P2
Guess what themes happen to be in the wedding vows Victor hears? A) Fighting for a relationship you love. B) Not giving up on someone in the tough moments.
“I know there will be tough days but it's on those days that I vow to love you the hardest” / “I vow to always remember that we are worth fighting for. Forever. No matter what.”
Gee, what an extraordinary coincidence!
And what does Victor do in response to hearing a loving couple voice his own feelings and goals? He looks at Rahim. Or rather, to Rahim. He knows Rahim is a romantic (like himself and Benji are), so he knows Rahim would share those goals too. And Rahim certainly is transfixed by the vows, very much feeling their sentiments too.
Rahim just ticked a box Victor is currently desperate for: someone who looks like they value fighting to beat the odds for the person they love, unlike what Benji is seemingly doing. Victor can project that onto Rahim. In reality, there is no way of knowing what Rahim would actually do in a relationship, but he feels safe right now.
It rather feels like VIctor was trying to distance himself from Benji in that moment and find a sanctuary with someone else who would give him the love and commitment he really needs right now. Like a protective, defense mechanism. He is so terrified that Benji has reached his limit of fight; that this time their argument and Victor’s breach of trust pushed Benji too far and Victor will end up severed from him and alone. With each hour Victor is closer to processing the end of that relationship and is now trying to put up a shield to block the impending tsunami of pain that he really doesn’t want to be hit by.
BENJI MAKES HIS OWN VOW
Victor doesn’t know it yet but we, the audience, get a hint of good news: the romantic vow exchange cuts to Benji staring at a picture of Victor on instagram, clearly missing him. From that piece of storytelling timing, we know what that probably means… (Flashback please to Benji’s declaration of “I don’t think I could give up on you. Even if I wanted to.”)
Benji is fighting. Or trying to.
What seals the deal is the beautiful conversation Isabel has with him -- her promise that Victor adores him and that Victor did actually stand up for Benji to the point of impressing her with his moxy. For a lot of the season, that is so much of what Benji needed -- to know he was worth standing up for, fighting for. Gee, what a familiar theme…
The next time we see Benji, he has come to the wedding reception, after his shift, as Victor’s belated plus one. His appearance symbolizes a promise, a vow of his own that is yet to be said out loud: that he is committed to fighting for their relationship to work.
I found that a really nice piece of storytelling -- that Benji is linked to the wedding vows at Brasstown and then fulfils them (or at least will try to make the sentiment a reality as best he can).
Unfortunately for Benji, Victor does feel a connection with Rahim. New friendship is exciting and thrilling on its own let alone having the opportunity to suddenly slow dance with that person. Lines can get blurred. Plus the atmosphere is completely romantic and Victor has never had the opportunity to experience this particular romantic act before.
Victor and Rahim spend quite some time staring deep into each other’s eyes without even saying a word to interrupt the Moment. Because it is a legitimate moment of intimacy between the two. Which is exactly why Victor doesn’t stop immediately and run straight to Benji as soon as he notices Benji has come to see him. His head is still half in the Moment and it is tricky to extricate himself from Rahim.
That Moment is also why Victor doesn’t keep chasing Benji through the yard after Benji sasses him with his ‘Sure, Jan’ energy after Victor insists Rahim is just a friend.
Consciously Victor thinks he is telling the truth, but his “That was crazy, I’m not allowed to have a friend?” defense had the same energy as S1 Benji’s “I know I didn’t do anything wrong when you kissed me!” before scuttling his ass out of Brasstown with all of his belongings. Hello guilt.
The question is how much is Rahim a friend-cum-something-more. Which is the crossroad Victor finds himself at when Rahim confesses his feelings and kisses him.
We have Rahim who confessed so sweetly and endearingly, who at this moment is comfort and warmth and safety because Rahim isn't going to break up with Victor any time soon. And whom Victor does feel a connection with.
And we have Victor’s relationship with Benji which feels like a dying ember, especially now that Benji is even more furious at Victor and it will be a very hard battle to win him back around again. It won't be a romantic running into each other's arms moment if they were to reunite…
So Victor has a dilemma to figure out now in Mia’s room: does he fight a very hard uphill battle with Benji to win him over (a fight filled with inevitable painful emotions being unleashed), or does he just let it go since that appears to be the trajectory for them... Or does he try exploring things with Rahim where there is a 100% success rate guaranteed in the short-term if he accepts Rahim’s declaration…
If the big theme of this episode is vowing to love someone on their tough days and committing yourself to a relationship worth fighting for (something Victor had been obsessing over even before he heard the wedding vows), it would feel like a strange conclusion for Victor to choose Rahim over the partner who proved he was mutually willing to fight for their relationship against the odds, especially when they have already been tested through tough times and found their way through. (And of course Felix’s visualisation exercise would have reminded Victor of all the qualities he loves about Benji...)
THE WINK OF VICTOR’S PARENTS’ PARALLEL
And finally we have the culmination of an underlying parallel: Victor's parents’ relationship, which also slips into the theme of those wedding vows.
Isabel and Armando, the high school sweethearts who were stuck in a cycle of fighting, fore-sake choosing a new partner with less baggage and instead make the choice to get back together. This doesn’t influence Victor’s decision because he doesn't know about his parents’ progress yet but we, the audience, do know. We can see the underlying parallel there. They are making it work, so so too can Victor and Benji if they keep putting the work in to understand each other better and learn how to communicate.
But that’s just my take on ep 10.
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I'm planning on updating later today :)
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Hi I'm Gideon. I'm not actually a gargoyle but they're a huge paratype of mine and my demiform looks like one. It/they pronouns, almost 29 years old.
[Been in therian/otherkin communities since I was 13 (2006?) but I'm probably not recognizable from Werelist a thousand years ago at this point unless you've kept in contact]
My alterhuman IDs are:
- transspecies "demidrakn"
Which is me 100% this life. The blog for which is @transgargoyle
- DreamWorks Dragons dragon kintype. I call all dragons from HTTYD "drakns" to (A) differentiate and (B) because I don't ID as or with dragons as a whole and consider drakns their own group of creatures. (I call my now-species demidrakn to differentiate)
my species is not canon (yet?) and I don't believe it was a past life, but that I should have hatched as that this life but something went wrong and I hope it's "fixed" next life. so I consider myself fatedkin.
- a kardiatype? a past life that isn't me anymore but is a big part of my past, "digimorph" which is a shapeshifter from a digital, videogame-like universe. I'm not that being anymore but I still miss the digital world stuff. (used to be this blog)
- Canine-hearted (/blanket-canine-hearted?/ clado-canine-hearted?)
I relate strongly to pretty much all canines from domestic dogs to feral dogs to wild canines to werewolves and hellhounds to archtypical and cultural concepts of dogs and coyotes and wolves and foxes etc etc etc. Blogs are @suburbanwerewolf and @caninequandary but both are also mental illness / trauma blogs so beware
I'm doing a reintro because I keep getting notes on the intro I tried to do and then immediately realized a bunch was wrong x_x
But if you see that face *points at icon* and the word "gargoyle" in the url that's me.
this blog is my main alterhuman blog where I talk (hence the word "gabbing"), and the individual blogs I've already linked. I'm working on a new glitch-aesthetic digital videogame-world blog.
I also have @thatnonhumanfeelwhen, an old school "that feel when" blog about any nonhuman feelings from anyone other than KFF. Feel free to submit. It's not dead I'm just extremely low on spoons so I haven't been looking for stuff to reblog and have no submissions.
Not alterhuman focused but I also have @neogargoylecore which is a shitposting / goblincore blog, that's where a lot of fun weird stuff goes. And I have @unhumansuggestions which is not a suggestion blog but it is a more voidpunky blog.
Anyway I'm around. I'm active on Tumblr and NNP, but also like I said low on spoons. You can message me and interact but I might not be able to respond or might only respond in emojis. Dont be a dick if you do interact. Carrd here that pretty much has the same info and a bit more. Please read the "Don't" page. I block generously (you understand).
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Hi, my day was shitty and I have to learn for a class test which I write tomorrow. I didn't have time to learn for it, because I studied for other class tests before. And someone hit my car in the rear, but nothing serious, I'm alright but I'm still shocked a bit. Now I have few little scratches on my car rear. Why do I always have bad luck. I want to cry, it's not my day today 🥺.
The positive thing is, our neighbour (he is a police officer, he has his deployment, if people are demonstrating) were outside and carried his little daughter (she is baby and totally adorable) in his arms. When I drove home and tried to park parallel, what I couldn't because, I was too excited, I saw him with my mom talking and my mom said, I had this car accident. He was just like oh shit and asked if he could park my car, which was really nice of him, before he did it, he gave his little daughter to my mom. Few minutes later he he talked with my parents and me and I thanked him. He took his daughter in his arms again and I went home with my parents.
Sorry for that long rant 🙈
How was your day and how are you ? 🙂
Aww, I'm so sorry :( that sucks. And I'm sorry about your car, that's terrible
But that's so adorable🥺 God bless the police officer and his family, he sounds so nice and sweet
It's okay, don't worry, I'm sorry for the late reply though!!
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I have been reunited with my Winx DVD's!!! Turns out one of them contains character profiles, and they're actually pretty neat (Stella is the ONLY ONE they called SMART they respect my girl😭) so I figured I'd share them here with translations
Age: 16 years old
Place of origin: Earth
Power source: the legendary dragon flame
Loves: learning new spells, and anything related to magical worlds and beings
Strengths: independent and a born leader
Weaknesses: A bit impatient, stubborn, and insecure because she doesn't know anything about where she's from
Age: 17 years old
Place of origin: Solaria
Power source: sun- and moonlight
Loves: all things pretty, love spells, and the latest trends
Strengths: lively, optimistic, smart, and always dressed to the nines
Weaknesses: lazy, doesn't take school seriously, and she's a shopaholic
Other: she's the most concerned with her appearance and she's Bloom's best friend
Age: 16 years old
Place of origin: Linphea, realm of flowers
Power source: she draws her energy from all flowers and plants
Loves: forestry, and plant related expiriments
Strengths: the most mature one of the group, and has a great sense of responsibility
Weaknesses: lacks confidence
Other: she shares a room with Bloom
Age: 16 years old
Place of origin: Melody, realm of music
Loves: making music, and daydreaming
Strengths: natural talent for investigation, she's super athletic, and a great dancer
Weaknesses: can be a bit moody seeing as music determines her mood
Other: she shares a room with Tecna and is the tomboy of the group
Age: 16 years old
Place of origin: Zenith, realm of tecnology
Power source: she gets her power from all technological gadgets
Loves: all kinds of science and inventions
Strengths: a perfectionist, knows exactly what she wants
Weaknesses: at times a little too overconfident
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sometimes I have self worth, other times I want the sole reason I continue to live to be how well I give head to dangerous men
They are so cute that one that goes :D
The first one is laughing ohhh 🥺
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