#the milk you drink would never be worth this btw

[oca-rinn-a]

The Ethics of What We Eat, Singer and Mason, published 2006

#tw animal death #tw dairy farming #dairy farming #animal cruelty #animal rights #animal welfare #vegan #the milk you drink would never be worth this btw #carnist #animal exploitation #this was a farm of around 1000 cows which in the US is considered a medium operation #animal welfare for farm animals is still controlled by states #there are no federal requirements

[slasherhoe87]

Hi, LOVE ❤ , I have a very " perverted " request and maybe you will hate me for that so, s/o has big boobs which turns out to be LACTATED, s/o also really likes suckling slashers through her big boobs and maybe more 😏. Sometimes milk will suddenly come out of her breasts, and the way to stop it is by sucking the milk until it runs out . S/o also really likes to breastfeed them while having sex.

You don't have to do this request if you don't feel comfortable, I know I'm a disgusting person and you deserve to judge me.

Btw, don't forget to take care of your health and always drink lots of water. Your blog is so perfect 💖💖💖

Don't feel disgusted or worthy of judgement - we all have our kinks and I assure you, most of us have dreamt up way worse shit - I know I have lol

WARNINGS: 🚨MINORS DNI🚨 / 🚨NSFW🚨 / BREEDING KINK / LACTATION KINK / MOMMY KINK / HUCOW KINK

Slashers x Fem Reader

Feat. Thomas Hewitt, Billy Loomis & Brahms Heelshire

🍼SLASHERS WITH A LACTATING S/O🥛

THOMAS HEWITT

Feels guilty every time when he looks at your swollen belly and gets hard

He just can't help himself

Just knowing that he put that baby in your belly drives him wild with lust

But when he notices your heavy, swollen breasts start leaking through your thin sundress, he just about dies internally

You notice his intense staring but act like you can't tell that he's doing it

Inside you're smirking

When the two of you sit together or lie down next to one another, he rests his head on your bountiful chest - his fingers flexing, just itching to squeeze

Has dirty Hucow fantasies about you being caged in the barn, restrained and milked by him - either using his hands, mouth or milking machine

Little did he know that you too had those fantasies

Not soon after when both of you could no longer contain yourselves, you find yourself in the very situation you both have fantasized about

🚨 hucow kink below🚨

You're naked and bent behind the feeding cage used for the three cows the Hewitt's keep. Your head is lodged through the bars where the cows' heads normally stick through and your wrists are tied to rope firmly knotted around two wooden columns on either side of the cage

Thomas is pounding away behind you into your sopping swollen pussy

His hands are squeezing your large, heavy breasts while two breast pumps normally used for livestock are milking your deliciously aching, puffy nipples for all they're worth

You're pretty glad the rest of the Hewitt's are out on the town otherwise they'd be hearing your loud and obscene moaning and screaming

Thomas's lust is overflowing

Never would he have imagined to ever be indulging in one of his oldest and biggest fantasies

The tears are streaming down your flushed cheeks

Your engorged nipples are overstimulated - the pumps ruthless

The pleasure-pain causes your swollen clit to pulsate and your slippery hole clench tightly around Tommy's girthy cock

Thomas grunts as he feels your pussy clench around him, the hold on your breasts tightening - helping the milk escape your body even more

Eventually you feel the white-hot heat shoot down to your core and your wail out your mammoth of an orgasm - you feel the liquid gush around Tommy's cock and splat onto the hay strewn ground

Tommy's movements become erratic, his pounding even more jarring before he lets out a low throaty moan and spills his thick white ropes of cum inside your quivering used cunt

He pulls out of you with an obscene squelch and even more fluid drops to the ground. He admires the sight of your loosened, leaking, swollen pussy before he steps around you and turns the milking machine off

You smile lazily up at him - face flushed, weary and satisfied

He looks down at you with adoration in those sparkling grey orbs of his

He gently removes the pumps from your aching breasts with a pop - your hefty breasts jiggling from the action

You giggle before gasping as small streams of milky white liquid shoot from your raw, enlarged nipples

Thomas licks his lips and gets on his knees in front of you before cupping your breasts and gently taking a sensitive nipple into his warm, eager mouth

He moans as feels the warm white liquid squirt onto his tongue and down his throat

The taste is intoxicating and he'll be sad when you will eventually stop lactating

But until then, he plans on milking you for all you're worth

BILLY LOOMIS

You're lying on your bed - exhausted after a long, hot day.

Its not easy being a pregnant college student.

Just as your eyes flutter closed you hear a rustling of your curtains by your bedroom's open window.

One eye opens and you spy your boyfriend Billy, who you've been dating since you were both 16, hop into your bedroom.

He smiles warmly at you before crawling onto the double bed and cuddling up next you.

He places his scarred hand atop your swollen belly and kisses into your neck and onto your cheek. You both discuss your day and chat a bit about the latest horror films that have come out before his hands start roaming your body and his groin slowly starts rutting against your thigh.

You smirk and seek out his lips for a slow, sensual kiss. Billy moans into the kiss while his hand massages and squeezes your large, milk-heavy breasts.

Since you started lactating, he couldn't get enough of your breasts nor your leaky puffy nipples.

Whether you two were in the movie theatres, his car, on campus or almost anywhere really, his hand would seek your breasts out and he'd beg to suckle. It almost seemed a need for him, somewhat even deeper than a kink.

Billy starts to eagerly unbutton your nightgown and stops when he reaches your hips. You know what he wants and you're happy to oblige.

"Wanna fuck your tits, baby" he whisper groans into your ear. The sound of his wanton voice sends a thrill to your core and you shiver with a nod.

He quickly unbuckles his belt and unzips his black jeans before releasing himself from his silky burgundy boxers.

Billy is rock hard. Pre-cum oozes from the tip of his blushing cock and drips down onto the bed, leaving a string of the clear goo from bed sheets to tip.

He moves to sit on his knees before gently grabbing your heavy orbs and gives them a firm squeeze - watching in awe and growing desire as small streams of milky liquid shoot out from your puffy nipples.

You sigh and groan as Billy leans down and takes one of your engorged nipples into his mouth - his teeth gently scraping against the fleshy peaks. He moans as the taste of your milk washes over his tongue - the vibrations from his throat sending sparks of thrilling electricity to your nipples and clit.

After having his fill (for now) he removes his lips from your swollen nipple and leans forward to give you a deep, passionate kiss. You taste yourself on his tongue and your cunt moistens even more.

"You ready baby?" Billy asks as he pulls away from the kiss and takes his cock into his hand.

You nod, eager to have him thrust between your sizeable breasts before eventually taking his hot load into your waiting mouth.

Billy positions himself over your torso, mindful of your belly. He takes hold of your large fleshy mounds while sliding his weeping cock between them as he pushes them firmly together, milk streaming out of your tits like a fountain.

Billy moans at the sight of you beneath him and at the feeling of your massive tits milking his throbbing cock for all its worth.

He sets a steady pace all the while praising you and your milkers.

"Do my tits squeezing the cum out of your cock feel good, babe?" you ask wantonly through your lashes at Billy.

Billy hisses at a particularly sensitive thrust before slowly nodding at you. Your boyfriend's head looks up at the ceiling, his eyes half lidded, mouth slightly agape - he is totally lost in the moment, in the euphoria.

You can see the haze of pleasure and desire swirling within his chocolate orbs.

Eventually his moans become louder, whinier even and his grip on your breasts clutch even harder. You whimper at the force of his fingers but it only gets you wetter. His thrusts become faster, more uneven before he eventually makes eye contact with you. His lust possessed face sending a white-hot pulse to your core.

"Babe... I'm gonn-" Billy groans loudly before he can finish his sentence as hot strings of thick cum shoot into your open mouth, some tendrils miss and hit your chin and throat.

You swallow his warm seed as his thrusts slow down before coming to a steady halt. His breathing is laboured and adoration shines through his gaze at you.

Taking his index finger he gently scoops up the cum that missed your mouth and places it on your tongue which you had stuck out for him. You swallow and open your mouth again showing him that you have taken all of him.

Billy hums in approval and leans in for a kiss. He loved kissing you after he cummed into your mouth - the taste of himself on your wet tongue drove him wild.

"That was perfect, baby. Thank you" Billy praises you as he gently massages your swollen breasts. "Now, how about I return the favour?" he asks as he runs his index finger up the seam of your slick cunt.

You lick your lips and nod in anticipation while Billy moves down between your legs.

This night was only going to get better.

BRAHMS HEELSHIRE

Brahms can be petulant and difficult to interact with at times

Like this past week when the scheduled daily maid had called in sick, leaving you to tidy up the huge mansion for the few days that she had taken off

You had asked him to help you with some dusting and wiping of surfaces with a cloth

He refused of course. Whining that he didn't want to

After having a stressful week yourself with not so good news from family and being more tired than usual thanks to your pregnancy you lost your temper and scolded Brahms

You practically tore him a new one

He sulked and sobbed behind the walls for the rest of the day

You felt guilty the moment the harsh and uncalled for words left your mouth

Yes he needed to be taken to task for his less than co-operative behaviour but you didn't need to do so in such a snappish and cruel manner

You decided to make it up to him

You made his favourite meal and dessert and left it in little Brahms's bedroom, knowing Brahms wouldn't want to eat dinner with you that night after your scolding

After dinner you took a warm shower and put on the lotion Brahms thought smelled the best - vanilla fudge

You wrapped yourself in nothing but your satin mauve bathrobe and stepped into your bedroom and sat at the edge of your bed

You hoped he would accept your apology and how you planned on making it up to him

"Brahmsy... I know I was pretty harsh earlier and most definitely shouldn't have said what I said or the tone I used"

You heard a slight shuffling behind your wall close to the massive old wardrobe in the bedroom

Good. He was listening and you weren't making a fool of yourself speaking to thin air

"I just want to apologize Brahmsy. I'm very sorry, could you please forgive me, sweet boy?"

As you spoke the last word you gently untied the string of your bathrobe and let it drop down your shoulders, revealing your naked form for the voyeur behind the walls and especially your heavy milk laden breasts

"Can I make it up to you Brahmsy?" you asked in a sweet voice as you ran your hands over your breasts

You heard the scuffing of boots behind the wall and then the clicking of a switch before the back of the grand old wardrobe's back panel opened and Brahms came out through your hung clothing

You smirked and sat back

Brahms slowly stepped towards you, chest heaving and eyes laser focused on your own chest

You scooted back on the bed and sat against the headboard then patted your lap

Brahms pulled his cardigan off and dropped in the armchair near by your nightstand and slowly crawled onto the bed and settled in your lap, his arm across the back of your shoulders and the other rested against his thigh

"Let me make it up to you sweet boy, can I do that?"

Brahms nodded so quickly he nearly got whiplash

You giggled and motioned for him to get more comfortable in your lap

With his mask off and on your nightstand your took one large breast into your hand and held it up

Brahms wasted no time in latching his lips around your puffy, leaky nipple and began suckling

You sighed in pleasure at the sensation before settling against the headboard more comfortable

As Brahms whimpered and moan and kneaded your other breast, you unzipped his trousers and pulled his throbbing, rock hard member free

You began to lazily pump him as you murmured praised and apologies in his mop of dark hair

Brahms's sounds of pleasure vibrated blissfully against your tender nipple and your squeezed your thighs together as the sensation shot right down to your pulsing clit

As you pumped him more firmly he suckled more deeply drawing a throaty moan from you

At this Brahms looked up at you, his eye swimming with satisfaction

You run your nails against his scalp and he sighs contentedly

"Does I taste good Brahmsy?"

Brahms nods and tweaks your other leaking nipple

Eventually he starts rutting into your hand and and you stroke him firmer and faster

His moans sending more and more vibrations through your nipple down to your heated core

Brahms's other hand leaves your nipple and instead finds your aching clit where he starts to rub firm circles against it

You groan at the pleasure your body is experiencing before both of you explode in a torrent white-hot ecstasy

Brahms removed his mouth from your nipple and gently lays his head on your chest before closing his eyes

"Brahmsy forgives you y/n"

#slasher smut #slasher fucker #thomas hewitt #thomas hewitt x reader #thomas hewitt x you #billy loomis #ghostface #billy loomis x you #billy loomis x reader #brahms heelshire #brahms heelshire x you #brahms heelshire x y/n #slashers #slashers x you #slashers x yn #slasher fandom #slasher community

[laulo821]

do you have thoughts on hersheys/american chocolate

to be frank i don't know what "american chocolate" reeeaaally means. like. do kitkats and mars and twix and stuff count? they're not chocolate per se, more like chocolate fingers. but if those are included, yea all that shablang is good but arguably more for the filling than for the chocolate itself (but since they're so common maybe they're france/europe-made and if so they definitely taste differently than real usamerican ones)

also i am not the best one to answer this kind of question cuz i have a very low sugar tolerance, i'm not a chocolate bar addict and i'm not a snacker in general at all. so yknow!! maybe biased answer!!

now to the taste test.

i have gone to three different superstores, a sweets-specialised store and a usamerican-specialised store and this is the only type of hershey's i could find so very limited choice here (arguably since it's not a plain chocolate i'd argue the test is null and void but let's carry on regardless)

(+ reese's cup cuz it's very usamerican, it's not very common and i never had one before. although it belongs to the chocolate finger kind of sweets)

the reese's cup is genuinely a horrible, awful snack. i'll be completely honest and had "mini reese's cups" before this test (i'm writing this live btw) and i was very close to just spit it all out because of how disgusting it was to me. and it happened again with the big ones lmao, albeit they were more balanced. by the second cup it's a bit enjoyable but it's really not . good. milk chocolate + peanut butter is Not It (never had peanut butter before so maybe it's solely because of the pb). plus it's sooooo sugary. i'm not gonna sleep tonight after this. i feel like i drank a cup of monster energy drink but there's no caffeine so it's not even worth it

now the hershey's – i took a square of black chocolate for cooking before hand to remember the taste of my usual chocolate (i don't like black chocolate but still. For Reference i had to). soooo. it's good. i like milk chocolate so it's very nice and the crunchy of the biscuit is cool, i like crunchy things. the milk chocolate feels very similar to the white chocolate i'm used to, albeit more sugary maybe. hard to tell with the biscuit. taste wise it's good. however the squares are very little (height-wise) compared to my usual chocolate bars so it's very unsatisfying hunger-wise, a feeling which i don't have AT ALL with my usual chocolate bars (4 squares and i'm usually "ok that's enough chocolate") so i understand better how you can just eat that stuff up until your cupboard is empty

so anyways. that's my review for that particular type of hershey's lmao. would eat again. i'd rather buy a snickers instead though. if i ever encounter regular hershey's i'll do an update i guess. but the reese's cups can fuck right off

#long rambling #ask #mmm choccy #thamks zap #also i honestly am a Kinder bitch auggHHHHH THEYRE SO GOOD #reese's and hershey's don't even come close to the sweet taste of chocobons (my fav chocolate snack) mmmmm #also i was raised near belgium and those bastards KNOW how to do good chocolate and so. yea . hershey's really lowtier compared to these im #or well. for that one kind of hershey's i had #fuming there's no more kinds aughhhggg #i won't buy it online btw dont ask #anyways thats all i guess hehe #i hope my Review™ was fine to read #(if i don't write an essay every time i write something down i explode btw)

[dykesbites]

for those asking what i stole that was worth at least 1k i had this strong phase when i was 10 where i HATED my mom and decided to take small revenges on her a la matilda dying her dad’s hair and shit. i poured soy sauce into my moms little stone fountain bowl so she had to clean it over and over again and i poured milk i didnt want to drink into flower vases. then i decided to pilfer my moms jewelry box. for context she never wears any of it bc it doesn’t fit her anymore so i knew she wouldn’t notice it missing. so i stole a diamond ring (FULLY INTENDING TO GIVE IT BACK BTW. I DID THIS W MULTIPLE RINGS AND I WOULD RETURN ONE TO TRADE IT OUT WITH ANOTHER) but they were bigger than my tiny 10yo fingers. once i dropped it into the cafeteria trash can by accident bc it slipped off and i spent like 20 minutes digging through cafeteria trash to find it and thank god i did. second time was the same thing but in my art class and my teacher caught me and was like why tf do you have this huge diamond ring and i was like erm... and she called my mom and it was a huge thing. my mom continues to complain about a turquoise ring that went missing and blames me for it even though i saw the ring in the box and distinctly remembering not wanting to take it bc i thought it was ugly but i can’t exactly argue bc i did kind of steal a bunch of valuables so i just put up with it  <3

#kaya.txt #i dont actually know how much the rings were worth so i just put 1k as a minimum but im sure it was worth a lot more #my parents used to be rich at some point so i think my dad bought her a few nice things

[superfuxkinghungry]

People who think that being vegan is a personal choice (How dumb could you possibly be to think that contributing to the torturing, abusing, neglecting, and depriving an animal of its ability to nurture its kids, and very unnecessarily prolonging their death by slitting their necks while they're possibly still alive "a personal choice"!???) are selfish fucks who forget that animals feel the exact same pain we do and have literal emotions just like us (sadness, pain, love, happiness, care, fear, terror, depression, etc.) and who don't realize the gravity of their decisions to contribute to the supply and demand of products coming from suffering and murder that they greedily feed on, put on/in their bodies, or test on their skin. There's a LOT of things that a lot of people will be surprised aren't vegan. A simple google search will do you well by showing you if a product isn't vegan or is and what REALLY happens in slaughterhouses that kill animals "humanely" which BTW is bullshit everywhere. Killing an animal for food, testing, clothes, medicine, or any other purpose is not humane AT ALL. Its so gross! if you cared enough about animals to determine if a product is vegan or not before buying you could make a difference! Please, don't keep ignoring the cruelty, agony, mental torture, sadness and fear these innocents have to go through on the DAILY before their eventual murder that by the way isn't "fast and painless". If you wouldn't let your family member, friend, or partner suffer in a slaughterhouse, or wouldn't eat them, why would you let a helpless animal suffer and be cooked for dinner? Just search what happens to these sweet, loving, and desparate helpless souls in reality, behind the scenes of the fake ass ads and labels. It's SO fuckin terrifying and horrible. Your burger, TV dinner, your couch, boots, bearskin rug, hot dog, cosmetic, and so much more products that are made with either carcasses, animal byproducts, animal products, or animal testing, (or a mixture of each) really isn't worth the lives and suffering of so many animals globally AT ALL!!! and you can certainly get healthy and be strong and energetic with plant nutrients! (There's also lots of benefits to not eating animal products and sticking to the power of plants!💓) By the way, drinking, promoting and buying dairy also contributes to the killings of male calves for veal and the rape of mother cows to keep them pregnant so they can keep producing the milk we like to put in our cereal, sauce, that big brands like Johnson&Johnson add to lotion [btw they use animal testing!!! Not a safe brand] or what dessert places add to ice cream. Nasty, right!! Oh, and you know what happens to the mother when shes not able to produce milk anymore after being repeatedly raped and forced to get pregnant? She gets MURDERED slowly for meat. (We drink milk that wasnt even for us, but for cow's babies! How would you feel if your mother was raped to impregnation constantly so her tits could be milked by animals, so random animals could drink her milk not caring about the suffering and rape she has to go through!!!?? and her babies arent even able to drink their mother's milk that was literally meant for THEM and THEM only to drink due to the consumer, government and workers' selfishness!?? Uncomfortable, right? Humans are so selfish fuck oh and by the way the cow gets taken from their mother after birth and yes the cows feel devastated and sad over the fact they can't even be with their family yes they have feelings you selfish carnies) Its always amazing to search if the product you want to buy is vegan and isnt made with any cruelty and evil! Veganism rules!!! FUCK THE GOVERNMEMT AND CAPITALISM LET THE ANIMALS ROAM FREELY LIKE THEY WERE MEANT TO! WE'LL NEVER STOP FIGHTING FOR THEM!!!!💓💓💓💓

#vegetarian #go vegan #vegan #veganism #animal cruelty #protect animals #animal wellbeing #animal welfare #animal rights #dairyindustry #dairy free #dairy industry #meat and poultry #poultry farming #pork #antinatalism #anti capitalism #savetheanimals #animal testing #slaughterhouses #milk #stop animal abuse #anti government #friends not food #make the change #no meat #meat industry #stop animal cruelty #stop animal testing #cow lover

[carbonated-fenwater]

We're officially into week two of hiatus so here's all my Shitty RWBY character headcannons:

Ruby Rose

- before Atlas, she had stupid contact names for everyone in her scroll

- really good at makeup but doesn’t have the patience for it

- “I’ve graduated from Combat Skirts. I wear a Combat Kilt now”

- has in fact practiced her “leader face” in the mirror before

- does morning affirmations that go along the line of “You are The Huntress. You are the baddest, silver eyed bitch in Remnant. Zwei is proud of you. The moon does not care if you cry during your lunch break today so you shouldn’t either.”

Weiss Schnee

- actually hates sweet stuff. Like she had access to all really high quality stuff when she was a kid and as she grew up she kind of grew out of it

- only one on the whole team who takes her coffee black and makes fun of the others for it

- purposefully smacks people in the face with her braid but always plays it off as an accident

- Brokest Rich Bitch in Atlas

- "Hey Weiss, can you spot me?" *riffling through her FAT wallet, "Sorry can't, I'm Atlas broke."

- Is actually blind in her left eye and whenever someone sneaks up on her on that side she will reactively glyph them into the ceiling

Blake Belladonna

- nyan-binary

- playing a game of what weird stuff she can do and convince her friends that "it's a Menagerie thing."

- *wearing her boots in bed* it’s fine we do this all the time at home

- “Hey guys watch how far I can jump and still land on my feet!”

- *stubs her toe on a table* “This is a hate crime”

- she picked that up from Sun btw

- absentmindedly fluffs up her hair when she’s nervous or thinking

- no one has EVER seen her go to the bathroom in her Atlas outfit. They don’t know how she survives

Yang Xiao Long

- desperately needs a haircut and she Knows it but she'd too stubborn to give up the "don't touch my hair" schtick

- uses her semblance to dry her hair because it takes 6 hours otherwise

- her and Jaune hanging out together = “We’re just Blonde Bois doing what blonde bois do”

- everyone learned very fast after reuniting not to ask Yang for a hand

- drinks Kool-aid like a monster

Jaune Arc

- terrified of needles

- when practicing with his semblance in training he would rub his hands together and yell, "CLEAR!"

- hates coffee but started drinking it in Atlas in an attempt to seem more professional and grown up

- plays guitar but plays banjo better

- can also play spoons

- hates shoelaces with a Passion which is why his boots use snap ons

- has had Nora and Yang spin him really fast on office spinny chairs to help him get over his motion sickness

- one of those people who shushes inanimate objects when they make noise. The rest of JNOR has also picked up this habit

Nora Valkyrie

- uses her semblance to shock people

- "If I run and leap at Jaune, he will almost certainly catch me in his arms"

- the friend that you love to hate for being a morning person

- sometimes will just,,,, pick up her teammates and be like “that’s enough for today we’re going back to the room and you’re lying down and drinking some water”

- napping queen. Seriously No One can just clock out and catch a fresh 30 zs just anywhere like she can

- one of those people who doesn’t like coffee, hot chocolate, or tea and Only drinks whole milk

Oscar Pine

- notorious impulse buyer

- Hates soda. He drank it once and thought he was dying

- unironically says shit like "farm fresh baby" and "This would’ve never happened back on the farm" in response to things

- John Mulaney's entire "Zoning Out" bit

- “I was in Ironwood's office, he was reading me the results of the mission. It was important, I listened. And then I zoned out!”

- “Sometimes my wizard- I have this wizard- he'll be like, 'Are you watching the Grimm?' And I'm always like, 'I'm holding onto Yang, and I'm not gonna fall off. But no, I'm thinking about chickens."

- Chicken Fried by Zach Brown Band

- the inside of Oscar’s head constantly sounds like a Letterkenny Cold Open

Lie Ren

-is an excellent cook but bakes like Eugene Lee Yang on Without a Recipe

- has an entire vocabulary of just sounds that only Jaune and Nora fully comprehend

- “Hey Ren, you want some tea?” “Hzzm” “Two sugars or one?” “Hrrm” “You got it buddy.”

- L’oreal, because he’s worth it

- tongue piercing I will not elaborate on why

- instituted a “Team ALPN/JNOR Swear Jar” after he heard Oscar say “fuck” once under Jaune’s supervision

Qrow Branwen

- smells like campfire smoke. Everyone thinks it's a really good cologne but he just smells like that

- gonna do the obvious one: distracted by shiny things

- one of his rings is a fidget ring

- Went through a karaoke phase

- listens to Post Malone and cries sometimes

- has done the gallon challenge

Penny Polendina

- likes to mess with people by carrying around nuts, bolts, and screws and just dropping them behind her

- intentionally misinterprets very basic forms of greeting

- remember that one scene from Lilo and Stich with the record player?

- feeds the stray cats and dogs in Mantle

- she and her dad will make fun little toys in their free time and give them out to kids. She almost always has a spare teddybear or something for when she’s down in Mantle in case she needs to comfort a kid

#rwby #rwby8 #ruby rose #weiss schnee #blake belladonna #yang xiao long #jaune arc #nora valkyrie #oscar pine #lie ren #qrow branwen #penny polendina #in my mind all these characters have their own unique version of bastard gremlin/cryptid energy

[pokehumanmagines]

Hey! Do you have any headcanons for hoopa and/or darkrai? Sorry if you don't take requests, love your blog btw! Keep it up and stay safe!

(side note: one of the first Pokemon I was ever interested in romantically was Darkrai, and they were a part of one of my first ships. Yeah Darkrai x Dawn for lyfe babey. Anyways, not sure what forms of Hoopa you wanted since there’s both Bound and Unbound, Bound being a gremlin and Unbound being unreasonably sexy genie, so uh yeah. Also thanks for being sweet, I appreciate it! Also yes I very much take requests but I may close the ask box soon cause there’s a bit too much and I’ve got a client to work with rn hnnnnggh).

Darkrai: So you know how Darkrai literally locked themselves away on an island for over 50 years just so they couldn’t hurt anyone with their nightmare powers. Well you’re going to do a training montage with them where they learn self-control. Sure the nightmare thing is involuntary, but if Cresselia can control her good dreams powers, this edgy demon can too. I can only think of Darkrai as being sensitive, shy, and loving. Sure his powers are inherently bad, but that doesn’t mean he would be. His large hands are for hugs ok? Please hold his hand, he misses physical affection, he’s so starved. While still training him with self-control, he will have to sleep in a different bed from you. He wants to cuddle but he can’t risk you having horrific nightmares. It’s not worth it. Him and Cresselia have a strange relationship. They’re siblings but don’t quite act like siblings. Sibs tend to either hate each other or absolutely love each other. There’s no inbetween, except for these two. They sort of tolerate each other, and feel a sense of contempt since they never really “grew up” together. It’s complicated.

Hoopa (Bound and Unbound): Hoopa in their Bound form is a little meme gremlin that will drink all your milk and shove your fingers in warm water at night. There is no stopping them, you must live with this forever unless you unbound them. Which is also possibly a bad choice. Unbound Hoopa is huge and cannot fit in your house. Also a horrible lustful creature that will hound you constantly. Sometimes you think the gremlin is easier to live with, then he puts your newly washed pants in the mud, and you hate everything again.

#i'm sorry hoopa is nothing but a horrible little gremlin in my mind i cannot think of them romantically #darkrai tho #if someone else asked for him i could spout more cause im love him so much #darkrai #hoopa #pokemon x reader #pokemon #darkrai x reader #hoopa x reader #pokemon x human #pokemon diamond and pearl #pokemon x and y #pokemon headcanons #pokemon hcs #also i'm sorry i didn't get to this and others sooner cause i'm a bit busy rn!!

[everlarkbirthdaygifts]

Happy Birthday, jbsaucy!

Happy belated Birthday, @jbsaucy​! We hope you had a wonderful day back on the 16th, and that you celebrated in style! To bring your party back around, the lovely @mega-aulover​ has written a story just for you!

For this year, I am recently divorced and trying to get the nerve up to get out there. So I would like to request a 30/40s Everlark, post divorced meeting

Jbsaucy

Dear Jbsaucy I hope you had a wonderful birthday. I apologize for the lateness, and I hope you had a wonderful day. This prompt BTW was amazing and I had a great time writing it. It was a blast. Thank you to Norbertsmom for Betaing 

Rated T 

Title:  OFF THE MARKET

-kpkpkpkp-

Divorce sucks. SUCKS.

Getting divorced sucks, being divorced sucked.

But nothing, not the tedious nature of dividing unwanted movies, the fear of root canals, or getting a speeding ticket, compared to dating. Dating, ladies and gentlemen, after being married for ten years sucked royally. 

ROYALLY!

After my divorce, my attorney suggested I get a hobby or join a club. I really wasn’t a social person. Not much of a talker, and avoided any and all spotlights. It was this fear of the spotlight that originally brought me in contact to my now ex-husband, Darius.

My best friend Gale pushed me to do one of those karaoke nights. I panicked and ran straight into Darius. He thought I was cute, and I was grateful he went up with me to the karaoke microphone. He sang and I laughed. The rest is history; the marriage only lasted ten years. But I knew we weren’t right for one another, partially because Darius was a very sexual person, for me sex wasn’t important. I got more enjoyment out of getting my teeth cleaned. He found someone who revved his engine and I got the fica and dates. 

Yup Dates.

How did that happen you ask?

Well, I’ll tell you I followed my divorce attorney’s suggestion. Preface-OUTSIDE OF A COURTROOM NEVER EVER FOLLOW YOUR DIVORCE ATTORNEY’S ADVICE.

With that warning sign, I digress. Taking a deep breath, I pinch the bridge of my nose. Wait for it... I joined a book club. 

It was the only natural course of action. After our divorce I got all of the books. You see one of the things Darius and I loved to do was go to bookstores. We’d buy all of these books with the intention of reading them, and we never did. We had bookshelves filled with books from the 100 Must-Read Classic Books by Penguin. So after my divorce, I sat in my newly minted apartment with a box of wine and all of these books. 

I was looking at the boxes, my divorce papers jutting out. Amongst them there was a note - with the name of a book club, the real 451 book club, with an address. I called them the Squad 451 or the Squad. The women were a hodgepodge of personalities; the right blend of sweet and crazy. There is Mags, the motherly type. She has boatloads of grandchildren. Then there is her neighbor Greasy Sae  who runs a diner in town. I used to go to her diner as a kid and consume her mystery meat soups. The older woman is bawdy and half of the things she says makes me blush redder than a red bean. Next is Annie, a shy, slightly mad girl who is a librarian. Delly has the personality of the southern bell who wears pink and believes in romance. I’ve known of Delly forever; she and I went to the same high school. 

Foxface,  has one of those names with multiple consonants and vowels but prefers to go by Foxy or Foxface. She is freakishly smart and sometimes, I think she has blackmarket dealings because she’s so secretive. Then there is Effie, the middle aged, tightly wound woman whose book choices are as repressed as she is, like Jane Eyre. And last, but not least, is my divorce lawyer, yes the very same one who suggested I get a hobby, Johanna Mason who is, well, a sex fiend. 

I started meeting up with them, and six months after my divorce, that’s when the ladies conspired against me and set up my profile on one of those dating websites looking for men, for me. I had no idea, and on my birthday, they presented me with their “gift.” 

It was the gift you didn’t want, like a pimple on your wedding day or the runs before an important interview, or bad breath before a first kiss. 

Greasy said that if I didn’t use my, well, feminine - looks around - petals. That they’ll dry up and turn into ugly petunias. I announced sex wasn’t important, and even friged Effie said a lady needed to literally, figuratively, and metaphorically, occassionally let her hair down. 

 I said NO.

I demanded.

I scowled.

Nothing helped.

They created a profile based upon themselves, and yet through describing themselves they pegged me. I was nurturing. I had a sexy edge. I was introverted, and yet mysterious. I was smart, honest, loyal and a closet romantic. But if you tell anyone that, I’ll hunt you down, even after I’m dead. 

They split me up like a kid of divorced parents being schlepped from one house to the other. They set themselves up in teams and each team got to pick my dates. And everytime we met for a book club meeting, I was to dutifully report on the date. Based upon their success, a second date would be permitted. 

It was a simple proposition. 

I was naive. A stupid idiot, or as Bugs Bunny say’s, a maroon. 

Because I hadn’t really ever been out there. 

To be honest, I met Darius right out of high school, at my first college party, and we were married - okay it wasn’t a big wedding. It really wasn’t a wedding at all. It was a spur of the moment, we got drunk and ended up at one of those Elvis chapel impersonators. Annnnd bada-bing. 

I never really dated, so I agreed with the book club’s plan, because how hard could dating be?

 And thus began my nightmare.

I must state, or emphatically note, not all of my “dates,” were catastrophically bad. To be fair, most of the time I wasn’t interested. Delly said I wasn’t romantically pulled. Johnna said my engine wasn’t revved up. Greasy said if the man didn’t make me want to orgasam with a look, then he wasn’t worth my time. I posed this question to the universe: How in blazing blue inferno does a man make a woman...well you know, with a look? Was that even possible?

A hazy yellow fuzz enters my head and my mind wanders. I conjure up blue eyes and translucent lashes that never tangle.  

Sigh.

…. (my brain just short circuited at the thought of large hands)

Earth to Katniss. 

Okay sorry, I spaced out for a little bit, and their words spurred me on to continue my journey. And one year after my divorcce I had stories, no I have battle scars.  To prove my point, the following are my top three worst dates. In no particular order.  

Date Disaster # 1 was with an artsy type at a chique Italian restaurant. He arrived late, and was drunk, high, or both. Then fell asleep on his plate of bolognese. Yup, in his plate of spaghetti and meat sauce. I paid for my half, tucked my tail between my legs and left.

Date Disaster #2 was with a small man with glasses and a massive intellect who didn’t stop talking about flamingos. FLAMING PINK FLAMINGOS. My brain shut down. I didn’t hear the music in the jazz themed restaurant. I didn’t even taste the heat in the gumbo. The only factoid I remembered when we said goodnight was that flamingos were gray when they were born. I couldn’t even tell you how they became pink. The man was the human form of anesthesia for my soul. 

Date Disaster #3 was a nice man. We laughed. And everything was going well. We ordered drinks, a cranberry and soda for me, the bartender special for him while we waited for our table. Turns out he has a milk allergy and the bartender special had milk. When we sat down at the table and we were talking about our hobbies, his stomach began to grumble loudly. He became pasty and then as the waiter brought out our appetizers, he threw up all over the place. It was a good thing that throwing up didn't bother me, but it bothered our waiter who gagged. Needless to say, I burned the outfit I was wearing.  

Those were the top three...but there were more, just simmering to become the top one. And for a time I thought I wasn’t made to date.  But the ladies had faith and they were really trying to choose nice, interesting guys. However, nothing, nothing that I could ever imagine could top my latest date. 

I’m rushing along the sidewalk. I don’t want to be late, but at the same time, I don’t want to tell them how much of a calamity my latest date was, but to be completely honest, I don’t want to miss it. Tonight is also the night the group meets at Mellark’s. The friendly cafe style bakery with its rich and yummy pastries, both savory and sweet. It is my favorite place to meet. Squad 451 meets twice a month in different locations, including one of the two meeting rooms in the library, one of the community rooms in the Justice Building, and on our birthdays, we meet in a restaurant, but the bakery on Main Street is our favorite location. The Mellarks owned several locations. The flagship store was always managed by one of the original family members.  

If George Senior, or the middle son Ryan Mellark is at the helm of the bakery, they allow us to cavort in the shop until close. When his older brother George Junior or their Mother Muriel was in charge, we tended to be quiet, relegating our conversations to the books. When Peeta is in charge, there are free cheese buns and chaos. 

Please, stomach gods, let Peeta be there. I skipped lunch today because I had a deadline. I also forgot my wallet at home. Thankfully, my license was at the bottom of my backpack. I need food before my stomach eats itself. I am starving when I walk into the bakery. When I see Peeta, I stop. His blue eyes meet mine and my stomach flip flops. He gives me a slow sweet smile, before his eyes slide back to the customer who is ordering.

“Katniss,” Delly squeaks, waving frantically.

Somehow, my feet carry me over to the table and there is a plate of cheese buns and I thank every celestial being in the universe. His buns are heavenly. Sitting down, I take a napkin and snatch one.  My mouth waters and my lashes close as I bring the cheese bun to my mouth.  The smell of melted cheese, fresh bread, and the hint of dill, assuage my nose, before I bite into one of Peeta’s coveted flaky concoctions. The combination of the oozing cheese, the herbs and the buttery bread elicit a moan from deep within my being. These freaking cheese buns will be the death of me. 

“Wow.” Peeta’s voice causes my lashes to fly open. 

Peeta is standing near me with a cup of tea; his face and neck splotchy and red.  

My mouth is full of delicious food, but I forgot how to chew. 

Delly is looking between us. Her pale blue eyes quizzical, like when she’s trying to understand a concept or theme in a book.

 “Okay, bitches,” Johanna says, slamming her brief down. “Where’s the rest of the motley crew?”

“Mags and Greasy just arrived,” Delly answers absentmindedly. 

“Hey, Peeta, I need a strong black coffee.” 

“Sure,” Peeta says, all the while staring at me. I finally remember to chew. “Here Katniss, your tea.”   

Taking the paper cup, I can’t help feeling bashful. “Thank you.”

“Peet,” the girl behind the counter calls. 

Whenever Peeta is here, the business is brisk. He is charming. He was always charming, even back in high school he was the most popular guy, not only because of his looks, but because he was genuinely nice. I, like all of the other girls, had a mini crush on him. 

Looking over his shoulder he says, “I’ll be right back with your coffee, Jo.” 

Now Jo is looking between him and me, but hers is a wicked grin, like right before she nails a sleazebag who doesn’t want to pay for his children. I quirk an eyebrow, clueless as to what has Johanna showing off her predatory gleam. 

“Oh, it’s chilly outside,” Mags says.

“It’s colder than Rudolph’s balls outside,” Greasy says, her gruff voice is booming. Several patrons look at her. Greasy does not care. She’s well past her sixties and it’s her motto that she should live each day as if it was her last. 

In walks Effie, Annie, and Foxface, and they all say, “Hello,” in unison. 

The book of the month is actually a YA fiction called, The Fault in Our Stars, about teens with a terminal illness. I cried when Gus...I tear up once more...at the memory. But I know we aren’t going to discuss Hazel’s predicament with her parents. 

“So,” Delly says, bouncing in her chair.

I can’t help but grimace.

“How did it go?” Foxface says. She has an accent, but I can’t place it. 

“He looked like he belonged on one of those erotic books Johanna loves to read,” Greasy says, grabbing a cheese bun.

She’s not wrong. Gloss was a blond adonis, with slate blue eyes. And abs that have a flipping twelve pack, I ought to know, I counted them. The words are out of my mouth before I am aware of what I am saying.  “He really does with a twelve pack,” I say drinking my tea.

“Did you say twelve pack?” Johanna sat up. 

My eyes widen. 

“Wait, why are you blushing Katniss?” Foxface narrows her eyes.

“Did you and he…” Annie trails off. Her doe eyes are wide. 

“Did you have your first sleepover?” Effie leaned in. 

“Or did you dry hump him like a horny-toad dog?” Greasy’s voice bounces in the bakery.

Peeta’s pauses , wiping down the counter and looks directly at me. 

“NO!” My voice sounds half strangled.

Jo and Delly exchange a look. “Peeta,” Delly calls him over. 

Oh, no, no, no, I say to myself, eyeing how quickly I can get from the back corner to the exit. It is one thing to tell the squad, it is another to have Peeta know. I think I can sprint around the chairs and clear the table near the door like an olympic hurdle jumper. 

Peet walks over. “Hey Dells, can I get you ladies anything?”

“Katniss was going to regale us with her latest date,” Delly says.

“She’s going to tell us how she knows her date has Thor’s body.” 

“You’re dating?” Peeta asks, looking at me intently.

He doesn’t know I am dating or rather, being raked through hot coals.

“Oh,” Foxface chortles. “She’s dating.”

“Remember the guy who was texting with his mother during the entire date,” Effie said.

“There’s nothing wrong with that,” Mags saids grinning.

“Only the part when he had Katniss talk to her, and it turned out she was psychoanalyzing her to make sure she wasn’t an ax murderer,” Annie said laughing.

“Or what about the guy who kept on mentioning his ex and cried through the crème brûlée,” Greasy slaps her knee, laughing.

I can’t help but laugh. 

“Man, those are pretty bad,” Peeta says.

I hold up my finger. “No, those are tame.”

“Tame?” His blue eyes are sparkling. “You mean there are worse dates?”

Delly snorts. “Oh there are worse. I am so glad I am out of the dating pool.”  

“Yeah, Gale just loves you,” Annie sighs. 

Delly and Gale met when I joined the book club. And while I floundered, they fell in love and now Delly was pregnant.  

My eyes shift to Annie. “It’s so much easier when you fall in love.”

“Oh?” I say.

“I met someone,” Annie says softly. “He wants to meet all of us.”

I wonder what type of guy would date quiet, shy, introverted Annie who sometimes says things that remind me of that song from those Freddy movies from the 80’s. I shake my head.  Then I narrow my eyes. “Bring him to the next session,” I hear myself say. I want to meet this man, and make sure he will take care of my friend. 

“Really.” Annie clasps her hands.

I nod, but I notice Peeta is looking at me with this strange gleam in his eyes.  “Ah...yeah.” My voice sounds breathy. I frown, wondering why the heck I sound like one of those girls. You know the ones that always appear in the music videos washing cars and dancing on super yachts. Darius was fascinated by those girls, heck, his new girlfriend looks like one of those girls.

The women are chatting with Annie about the new guy in her life.  

“We'll discuss Annie’s beau later,” Mags holds her hand in the air. “I want to hear about Katniss’ date.” Her white hair spills over her shoulder as she fixes me with a look. “So tell us, how do you know Thor has a twelve pack?”

Somehow or another I knew the scrutiny on Annie would be short lived. My time to shine would come, but when I open my mouth to speak I can see a conspiratorial glance between Mags and Annie. And it hits me that they chose this man, because he looked like Thor. I scowl at the women who set me up on this one. Mags and Annie both have a pink tinge to their faces. I would have expected this from Jo or Greasy, but Mags and Annie, well it’s INCONCEIVABLE! 

I begin to speak. “He asked me to meet him at the edge of town, near route twelve.”

“Isn't that where Ripper’s place is?” Effie questioned, and she couldn’t hide her revulsion. 

“Yup,” I said, popping the ‘P’, thinking of the bar that disguised itself as an eatery. It was a seedy diner with cracked linoleum floors, yellowing formica, booths that had patches, blinking lights, and rickety chairs. 

“That’s where he asked you to meet him?” Mag’s sounds outraged. “That place is…is-”

“- a bedhaven for unsavory characters,” Foxface finishes. 

“You're brainless,” Jo mutters darkly. "Ripper's isn't the type of place you can go to Katniss. You should have called me."

As protective as I am about my friends, so is Jo. She's tough on the outside but has a really soft center. It's what makes her a perfect shark in the courtroom. Not that Darius was a jerk during our divorce. He actually wasn't. Johanna was present at the restaurant where he announced he wanted a divorce. Johanna later said it was my face, the vulnerability I tried to hide was why she took my divorce pro-bono. 

“I drove and brought my bottle of mace.” I know what everyone was thinking. The area in town where Ripper’s is located at, made the bad side of town look like a tourist destination. I didn't mind meeting my date there. I was looking forward to a basket of fries. Ripper's had amazing beer-battered fries. 

I've been to Ripper's once. I was with Gale and Thom who needed to score fake IDs. I ordered the fries, since I wasn't there for an ill gotten identification. But let me tell you, those fries. Oh! Holy mother of fries, no other fries can compare. 

Shivers!

I love food; it's why I'm a food critic now. What's so funny is that it was those fries that began my career as Buttercup, the elusive food critic. Back then I was Buttercup, the fussy eater. I blogged about them, no, I lavished them with love. I love my job. I can go into any restaurant, order anything on the menu, blog about it and get paid handsomely. And, most importantly, I can do it anonymously. Not even Darius knew I was Buttercup. He thought I was a boring housewife. Getting back to the fries, I wasn’t deterred from getting my fries.

“So then what happened?” Annie asked.

“He was there waiting for me. He stood up and smiled. And he's massive-"

"Just like a book cover," Foxface mutters.

 "He said his name wasn't Anthony, it’s Gloss.”

“Gloss?” Everyone said at the same time.

“Yup.” I sighed. “It was a sign. I should've left." Damn those fries! 

“So Gloss…" Peeta's sparkling eyes are on mine, his are an amazing hue of blue, like the indigo milk cap mushrooms. "Looks like Thor."  He frowns. "Thor with the long hair or short?"

"Long." The women around me answered as one.

Peeta turned those gorgeous eyes back to me.

Thor isn’t my cup of tea. I shrugged to show my indifference. "Gloss was sporting the Ragnarok look, short hair with facial hair."

 I swear I watch Peeta mouth, "short hair."

"Anyway, we sat at a booth. It was packed, actually." That should've been clue number two. Men at a joint like Ripper's at 8:30 on a Friday night, it was by the highway, plausible. But packed with just as many women. "The waitress who took our drink order could barely hear me."

"Was he nice?" Annie asks.

"He was sweet." Truthfully Gloss was a sweet guy.  He talked about his mother in a positive way, even if she gave him the name that was another descriptor for shiny objects. "He was attentive too. He told me his mother worked in the makeup industry. "

"That doesn't sound too awful," Delly says.

"He sounds delightful." Mags pushes her reading glasses up the bridge of her nose.  The gang is getting tired of the story and I hope they will move on to the reason we are  gathered, discussing the book we were reading. I begin to reach into my backpack because I really hate purses.

"If he's so delightful, why did he ask you to meet him at Ripper's?" Johanna says in her cross examination voice.

I wince as I take out my book.

"Yes, you must explain." Foxface demands.

"It's not nice to leave us dangling." Effie levels a look at me that has me squirming, feeling like I was being summoned into the principal's office. 

"I wanna know how you know Gloss has a twelve pack," Greasy says.

Peeta looks at me expectantly. 

Anndddd were back. I sigh. Will he run for the hills when I tell him? Most likely.

"We were talking about dancing.” My voice loses all it’s warmth. “I don't dance."

This causes a rumble of laughter and giggles amongst the women. Peeta looks confused. Finally Delly wipes the tears from her face and gasps, “You should never dance. Ever!” 

"That poor man’s toes,” Mags says, her shoulders shaking.

“Do I need to know?” Peeta looks between them. 

“I don’t dance!” I growl. The group erupts into another bout of laughter. 

“It was a scheme, a dirty underhanded scheme,” Effie says. 

The guy I was supposed to date was a dance instructor. He used the dating app as a way to drum up business. When the women meet him, he pairs them with guys who were there for a lesson. He paired me with a poor man named Harry. My nerves got the better of me, because I don’t like to be touched. Harry’s hands were sweaty. Harry tried to dip me as per my date’s instructions. I tripped, and in the process his toes were crushed, and I ended up with a sprained ankle. 

When I arrived in crutches to the next book club, well, that was one of those dates that simmers at the surface vying to be in the top three. 

“Gloss didn’t believe me. He said anyone can dance. I told him no, and explained that there are people who are predisposed to fly in airplanes, and some who get motion sickness in a car. “

“What happened next?” Foxface asks, moving to the edge of her chair.

“He went to the jukebox.”

“Oh no,” Johanna mutters. “Did he end up in the hospital?” 

“Is that how you know he’s got a twelve pack?” Greasy questions. The ladies, and Peeta are all staring at me. 

I shake my head. Why couldn’t there be a rush of customers right now? It is calm and I know the odds are against me. 

“Spill it!” Johanna demands. 

“Well, he queued up a song and waited a beat, and then Lenny’s Kravits’ American Woman started blaring. Gloss started sauntering and spun and did the splits on the floor. Next thing I know, the women in the place go nuts. They surround him, like a rabid pack of wild dogs.”

“Wait, what!” Delly exclaims her pale eyes bright, she grips the book in her hand. 

“That doesn’t happen,” Peeta says.

“It does to her,” Foxface said, her eyes shining with ferocity, like the eyes of those women at Rippers.

“Shut it blondie,” Johanna orders. 

“Yeah,” Annie says.

Taking a deep breath I continue. “He started dancing...hips…” my brain flashing to his hips gyrating. “...jutting out and…”

“Ohhhhh yeah,” Greasy cackles.

“Gyrating, his hips gyrating,” Foxface gasps.

With eyes closed I nod. “His hips were doing that all over the place. He then jumped on the table and proceeded to rip off his shirt. He shouted my name and told me his next move was his favorite. He spun onto his knees and slid up in my face before dropping his drawers.” I lower my eyes. 

“What,” Delly squeaked. “His pants?”

“It’s like Magic Mike,” Mags whispers.

I know the movie Mag’s is referring to. I’ve never seen it. “Yes.” 

“Was he naked-” Foxface began.

“-or was he wearing-” Annie cut Foxface off only to be cut off herself. 

“A G-String!” Greasy shouted excited.

I shook my head no. He wasn’t wearing anything, I can feel the heat burning my ears.

“Well don’t stop! What happened next!” Even Effie has lost her sense of propriety. 

“As I looked for an escape. It’s then I noticed  the poster on the wall, for the Slag Heap.” I pause and sigh, “Men’s Magic Friday Night Extravaganza, and Gloss was the headliner. I realized he’s a stripper.” 

And the place erupts in laughter. 

“What did you do?” Peeta asks.

My eyes connect with his.

“I slunk down to the floor and crawled my way out...drove to the hospital and made my sister administer a tetanus shot.”

 “Can I have his number?” Johanna says laughing but her eyes are dead serious. 

Peeta is smiling at me and I grab a cheese bun because they are as delicious as the man staring at me. 

Eventually we do get to the book, and it’s a pretty good discussion. Peeta let us stay until closing. Mags and Greasy are the last of the ladies to leave. It’s just me and Peeta since he let the staff go home. I’m loitering because I feel like I need to explain to Peeta why I let the ladies talk me into dating. 

I’m putting up the chairs on the tables when Peeta comes out. 

“You’re still here?”

“Yeah.” I look down at my feet.

“Katniss.”

“Peeta.” We both say at the same time, followed by a nervous chuckle.

“You first,” Peeta insists, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Dating wasn’t my idea.”

“It wasn't?” He raised an eyebrow.

I shake my head. 

“So what happened?”

“The ladies, they got me a year long subscription for my birthday, and knowing I wouldn’t go through with it, they choose who I date...until I find someone,” I can feel the heat rising from my neck and reaching my cheeks, “I like.”

“Really?”

I nod, incapable of speaking.  I cannot stop watching the way he blinks, those darned translucent lashes that never tangle. 

“Dating is pretty brutal.”

“Yeah,” I snort because dating is horrible. 

“My family is constantly setting me up. I went out with a girl who sang through the entire meal. She chose the pasta and sang On Top of Spaghetti.”

“What?” I laugh.

“That was my dad’s doing. My mom’s choice was a lot scarier. She made me do an obstacle course and made me do it three times until I beat the time she wanted me to reach.”

“Wow.”

“I was dressed in dress slacks, a nice shirt, and a tie.” He deadpans, “I even had on dress shoes.”

“I am so sorry.”

“Don’t be,” he shrugs. 

I couldn't help but smile. 

“Dating sucks until you find someone who makes you laugh, someone who makes dancing easy.”

He approaches or maybe it’s my own feet that carry me to him. But it doesn’t matter because when his arm slides along my waist, and the other cradles my hand, I have no fears. There is something familiar with him as I dance with him. A slow shuffle, that has the room spinning but none of it matters because I feel at home.

“Will you dance with me Katniss?” His voice rumbles in my ear and my heart is pounding in my chest.

His scent is a warm heady mixture of spices, dill, vanilla, and cinnamon. 

“Would you go out with me Katniss?”

“Yes,” I answer, and just like that my dating profile goes up in flames. Ladies and gentlemen, I am officially off the market.

#everlark #everlark fanfiction #everlarkbirthdaydrabbles #everlarkbirthdaygifts #fan fic #by mega-aulover

[fe-semi-decent-scenarios]

Top 5 fe characters you think you can take in a fight

Warning: Swear words below the cut because this is my opinion. I’m also feeling feisty so it’s colorful, read at a risk. 

1.Lorenz

This bitch is all talk with no bite. Come at me scrawny grapefruit, I dare you. I’m packing weight like y’all never seen and I WILL sit on you. Spew that noble bullshit in my direction, I dare you. I am a raging feminist and the moment you try to weigh my worth as a wife is when your skin tone will match your hair. From bruises, if I’m not being clear. My peasant ass will sit and crush your underdeveloped bones because you don’t drink your milk like the pussy you are. 

(I love Lorenz btw but yk how it is. He’s Lorenz) 

2. Duke Aegir 

I’m not Ferdinand’s biggest fan, I will admit. But this bitch? It ain’t over until the fat man sings. I’ll knock him off his pedestal faster than humpty dumpty fell off the wall. I’ll even start by shaving that mustache off the wrinkly leather he calls skin. 

3. Pallardo 

Y’all saw his hair, right? Do I have to say more? Dude literally shows up at the worst times in the game and if I don’t beat him up than someone else will. He’s already lost the game of life with a face like that. I bet he doesn’t wash his ass either. Filthy. 

4.Aelfric 

I hate you. I hate anyone that likes you. Hate is a powerful feeling and I would rather hurt myself while hurting you than not hurt you at all. I’ll take you down with me and hopefully Mercedes will have some Fodlan-equivalent of aspirin on her, because I'm going to headbutt you so hard that you’ll beg that Red Foreman existed in Fodlan so he could shove a foot up your ass instead. Watch out. 

5. Dedue 

He would feel bad for me because I’m a pathetic waste of space that spends more time pretending that I’m a herbalist than exercising. This win is purely from pity and I’ll take it. Why? Because getting things for doing the bare minimum feels good and he ain’t a man who’d punch a gal in glasses. My man here, my main man. He’ll let me have the glory all for free. 

Note: The women of fire emblem scare me and if they stepped on me I would thank them. There is no fight if I challenge them....except maybe Cornelia. I’ll rip that bubblegum bitch’s rats-nest she calls hair right out from the roots. Come at me you burnt chicken nugget, I’ll take you down with my knockoff Attack on Titan sword and you’ll lose because sothis forbid you break a nail. 

#fire emblem #Fire Emblem Three Houses #fire emblem scenarios #fire emblem imagines #fe3h imagines #fe3h scenarios #dedue molinaro #aelfric #lorenz hellman gloucester #stupid npcs #my opinion btw y'all can't come for me on this

[foryouthegays]

techno liveblog w timestamps lets go for ‘a new home (dream SMP)’ stream

good laugh times: 00:13:50, 00:14:55, 1:38:45, ik it doesnt look like a lot but like u should watch the stream anyway bc philzas there and his laugh is amazing and they just go so well together

times techno calls phil his friend: 00:6:00 00:37:00, 00:45:17, 0:1:09:30, 01:11:15, 01:26:35, 01:50:05, 2:35:00

FSDJKFAF;LS HE KEPT THE MUTED INTRO IN JHKADFLS (ends at 00:1:25)

i like how, when faced with Leaving Youtube, techno would choose to be an author. i want a book by techno. reblog this if u want a book by techno (with an audiobook by him as well) /hj. 00:1:33

i love how he says ehhhhhh so much lskjhdfas (abt 2 mins in) 

who the FUCK just remembers that the word fortuitous exists wtf 00:5:17

00:7:45 PHILZA TIME PHILZA TIME LETS GO

00:8:55 tommy time :/

0:14:10 rANBOO JUST WALKS IN, LOOKS AROUN ,AND LEA VE SIM CRYING 

i love how much philza laughs at technos jokes bc pretty much everything he says IS a joke he just says it in such a serious voice that p much everyone else is like,,,yeah,,,,yup,,,,and phil just knows when hes joking and his laugh is so good with technos voice. sbi? whos that? i only know philza and technoblade

00:19:30 ghostbur joins! this is my first time hearin ghostbur btw

00:19:40 haha string axe technos so bad at crafting what a fool /j

00:21:07 ghostbur: “Even I remember how to make a fishing rod!” ghostbur u just MURDERED technoblade oh my god im gonna scream hgjdfksla i love ghostbur so much

00:23:55: GHOSTBUR NO!! DON’T DIE YOU’LL BECOME A DOUBLE GHOST!!!! -technoblade 2020

00:24:55 technoblade neva lies -guys he almost did the technoblade neva dies ahh!!!!!

i havent heard anyone talk about this but techno has a dedicated roleplay voice. like listen to him talk to tommy at 00:25:08. his voice gets more even, he uses names a lot more often (seriously, listen to his theseus speech. he says tommy so often, its incredible.), and his voice gets,,,,deeper? not deeper but smoother, in a way, and he repeats what he says for emphasis instead of humor. and his voice is louder, and he seems more assertive. 

00:27:30 philza: where we goin, by the way? techno: to our- to my new home. 

techno cmon let phil live w u wed get so much more content cmonn

00:28:50 the fact that he calls the manhunt theme “dream music” makes me laugh so hard. and then his version of it,,,,,m love he (also he sings it here and at  01:14:20)

00:35:10 why is ranboo so cryptic im-

why does he just casually know the word sentry wh at i hate him 00:39:45

this is the worst sentence (structurally) ive ever heard techno say im gonna cry 00:49:33 ‘im too busy thinkin of new ideas to sleep so i could actually execute them’ and tubbos *oh?* after is just hdsfgkjlka

LKSJDHFJK 00:51:49

00:54:30

techno: thats one of dreams powers, he can just stop the rain

tubbo, quietly: like jesus!

i love them sm dsfhkjla they kept going but i jus gdfhjksa jesus has op

techno @ being the second worst thing to ever happen to those orphans: haha funnie!!

techno @ having fun w religious stuff: i wILL BE CANCELLED NO-

00:58:10 “hey if ur [ghostbur]  a ghost, do instant damage potions heal you now?” “...no,, they hurt me still :(” DSIULZKJHFSLKFJH 

01:04:00 his brother named the cow bob im- aww 

also he has a fanart wall again!!!

01:09:30 “phil, you’re the only friend i have left in this world.” aWWWWW HE GAVE HIM THE COMPASS 

“dont smoke, it’s a joke” -technoblade 01:14:15

ROLEPLAY SPEECH VOICE IS BACK AT 1:16:10 “they pillage my base for everything i’m worth, they use me for the revolution, but oooOOOoo i took a pickaxe with his consent? oOOOooOo i’m a thief!”

holy shit 01:17:15 “you know what, phil? for you, the world, alright? it’s fine.” oH MY GOD HHHHGHG (context, right before they were arguing bc phil took some blocks from his base and techno thought that when he said phil could take anything he meant from the chests)

the COMIDY of that villager coming in and sleeping while techno was readin donos at 01:22:05 RIGHT AFTER phil freaked out abt inturruptin his dono readin im SFDHKJLA:

techno talkin bout the winstreak and how he wont be able to live up to that sort of playin at 01:22:30ish is super important and ill transcribe it tomorrow, but if u can id highly rec watchin it. 

01:24:20 “[readin dono] what’s your favorite movie? uh, the princess bride is pretty good” techno ily that movie rocks also he said it so fast like hes ashamed of it noo

techno says no to canon ranboo son btw! 01:25:30

01:25:55 “i wasnt in that story, therefore it doesnt matter” all of technoblr be like 

01:37:49 is great lemmie transcribe

“how have you still not gotten a second monitor?? holy shit.”

“let me tell you something. and im only telling you this because i know that so many people in the chat are gonna be furious. so i recently realized- i think the second monitor can just be any ol’ monitor, right? you literally just plug it in, and its set up? well i mean you have to turn on some settings, but like, thats it, or something?”

“yeah,,,,, uh techno you fuckin destroyed my chat, by the way, oh my god, [earlier techno told his viewers to twitch prime philza] there has been like 40 primes just flying through”

“yeahhh twitch prime!!! twitch prime philza yeahh!!! so anyways the other day, i like, i looked to my left, and realized that my old monitor has been like, five feet away from where i sit and stream for the last three years?”

“oh my god...”

“so i- i literally do not have to leave my room to set up a second monitor and i havent. and i’m still usin my laptop for this stream.

“is this gonna be one of those situations where you like, you have a thing, you just refuse to do the thing?”

“listen, my desk is-

“yOU STILL HAVENT OPENED UP THE HYPIXEL PACKAGE!!!”

“AHHHH I HAVENT OPENED UP THE HYPIXEL PACKAGE! I HAVENT EVEN OPENED UP MY MCC COIN! DUDE I HAVENT EVEN OPENED UP MY ONE MILLION SUBSCRIBER PLAQUE! ITS STILL THERE RIGHT BEHIND ME! ITs sTILL IN THE BOX! i never made a video on it....”

“bruhhhhh [philza laughs] thats FREE VIEWS what are you doing??”

“ill open it at 8 mil :/.”

“you could LITERALLY make a video of you just like, throwing it off a wall, and then thumbing up, like doing a thumbs up, and then that would be it. 10 seconds. ten seconds. thumb and elbow in shot. [laughs]”

techno is such a disaster i love him

01:34:18 the way techno says “tommy, that statement has NEVER been true” i dont like sayin i simp for block men but GOD sometimes his voice is nicer than usual hhhgn

“man i sure wish tommyinnit was in this stream” -nobody ever (just after previous timestamp)

01:40:15 is fuckin hilarious and im actually crying oh my god techno just says things and says them well with a completely straight face how does he do it

i cannot WAIT until theres a president w the last/first name andy so we can say president andy and think abt technoblade

IM CRIASDNGUSFHD 01:44:38 PHILZA LOOK OUT LOOK OUT PHILZA  LSKJDAFJASD;LKF

i love when techno talks abt his vids. like u can tell he puts a lot of thought into the vids (esp these ones) and like at 01:47:00 he talks abt the “I DIDNT PUT DEAPTH STRIDER ON THOSE BOOTS, FUNDY!” and how its just that creepin realization that you were doomed from the start and how he made the armor, he isnt intimidated by the netherite bc he didnt enchant it all the way and only he knows that,,, and i just,,,hgg he

he reveals that hes writin the next arc at 01:48:00: “oh, speakin of arcs, chat, i’m writing the next arc. so, you know. hope nothin bad happens in two weeks, chat!” IM SO EXCITED like he clearly has his character fleshed out and is SO good at writing and retellin history im so so excited to see where he takes it AHHHH and also taht means he might stream more bc he might make his character more important (keep in mind this is the guy who wrote self insert hypixel fanfics. he has no shame in puttin himself first and i respect him so much for it) 

01:51:20 “they’re tryin to get a second customer but they’re riskin their first” is lowkey a good line

has anyone else noticed that techno says wise a lot? like at 01:55:10 he literally says “wise dragon armor” as a joke but like i think he says wise so much BECAUSE of skyblock like hjkfdsla

01:57:30 techno plea se eat 

ok 1:58:45 is hilarious and all but at the end of his ramble he says “come back, i miss you” and lowkey im crying 

techno needs to stop knowing his audience more than we know ourselves im hsfkjda 02:05:25 “the chat’s spammin ‘eat technoblade, eat!’ like they’re not gonna start, like, theyre not gonna get super sad if i ended the stream right now, like theyre not gonna all cry ‘i miss technoblade *sniffs* why- whyd he leave to eat food, why did he listen to our advice noooo’”

02:14:50 NEW VIDEO POGGGG CARL THE HORSE POGGGGGG  NOT A STREAM HIGHLIGHT POGGGGG

02:17:40 “i could start a potato farm out here to show how much ive changed” techno last time u made a potato farm u started an entire war that lasted a year that does NOT say calm and retired to me lskgdfjagsldj

02:23:00 why does techno just reference greek mythology so much. makin me scared for his arc. 

also he talks abt smp earth a lot in this stream i love it so much

i also just. love?? how much sbi respect tommy like they bully him but when talkin bout him they just have so much respect for how much work he puts into youtube and i just,,,,hgnn they r friends 

02:33:13 sbi streamer house lets go cmon

02:34:15 “i think if i streamed every day i could keep up” on one hand YE S  but on the ohter oh god techno no we have to keep up tho

hearing techno say “violence isnt the answer” is so scary  02:35:40

02:37:30 technosneeze 

hiS BROTHER SENT HIM 46 DISCORD MESSAGES SFKDJLFLKASF 2:49:25 i love his end screen so much hes just sadness,,,,retirement,,,t,echnoblade,,,the government is going to fall on its own due to lack of organization and ideals,,,,,,subscribe,,,,,sadness,,,,,also 2:50:45 is making me laugh so hard its just sad music and technos like??? whys phil in my house drinking milk????? 

overall, fantastic stream, if ya want some chill techno philza content i highly recommend. 

#stream post

[thirsthourdemon]

Tea party headcanon

Includes: All obey me characters except solomon, and barbatos

Genre: Fluff

Tags: Fluff, Tea party theme, Pink Pastry and Pekoe Parlour! Au, general

A/N: This is a celebration cause I happen to like my new formatting. If anyone wants to be added to the taglist then just send in an ask please!

||Lucifer

-He’s actually the one that invites you and the brothers to the tea party.

-Makes sure everyone is at least properly dressed

-A mother of 7 children cause that includes you 😌

-Hates it here the moment levi said he’d wear something from some anime about a ‘demon’ butler, mammon saying that he did NOT steal the precious fine china set and beel having that look on his face that says “If I dont eat everything on the damn table, Im eating everyone else.”

-Either drink pure black coffee or chamomile

-if He drinks an ocean of chamomile but no amount of ‘calming’ tea can help save this poor stressed demon who just thought he could finally get a small break and have a lovely afternoon tea with diavolo.

-I wont be surprised if he’s even payed 200,000 grim worth of damage on the place due to his whole family

-Satan thought it was a good idea to exchange salt with sugar but he avoided this cause he...he looked into satan’s eyes while he drank his bitter black coffee with no sugar or cream.

||Mammon

-Gold laced bone china that costs about 500 grim a cup? Sold.

-He didn’t want to go but apparently he saw something that had caught his eye ❤️

-He was always invited to be the man servant at the witches’ tea parties so he kinda thought it was boring

-Did not realize how much he liked fruit teas until he came here

-Did not bother to even wear anything fancy as requested😤

-Probably tried stealing some stuff 😔

-He is on his 3rd cup of fruit tea and the orange chiffon cake but STILL denies that he liked being there.

-Chiffon cake is his thing but he will never admit that so instead he goes for regular old bread

-Defensive over paying the bill but he gives in a bit cause lucifer had to pay for the fucking stuff he stole 😤

-Was fucked with cause diavolo was actually paying and not them

||Leviathan

-Im sorry...sebastian michaelis who? I only know levi in a stuffy butler suit

-Speak like he’s talking to his masters but still trash talks mammon

-“I thumb my nose to you, unrefined scum.”

-For some reason...I cannot stress this enough...He loves...Lolita tea parties.

-Probably a Lizzie fan from Black buttler

-He strikes me as the type to drink matcha or a classic earl grey for the aesthetic but drinks bladderwack tea due to how common it is when he was at sea

-he drinks his tea in a typical lolita designed porcelain tea cup and is charmed by it so he takes 50 photos of the set for his live journalng blog.

||Satan

-A refined gentleman who wore appropriate clothing and brought a book

-He brought a little sacket or his own spice

-He usually drinks chamomile to calm down but occassionally drinks lattes but this time since it was a tea party he settled on...wait for it...

-Ethiopian spiced tea! More specifically Cardamom milk tea in the hottest temprature it can handle

-Him and asmo like their teas hot

-Satan makes me think that he goes for finger sandwiches instead of cakes or pastries.

-Has a book with him and actually his books have tea leaves in them as well because he likes the book smell with the Lapsang Souchung tea

-The ideal guest until he tried to play a prank on lucifer

||Asmodeus

-would you believe me if I told you he walked in there wearing slim dark slacks, creamy white silked dress shirt and a pastel plum ribbon tie that makes me drool?

-OF COURSE YOU WOULD IT’S ASMO 😤

-He looks gorgeous and he knows it! And every waiter/guest there is trying to get his number! 🥺

-I can see him originally drinking assam tea but he switches between that and a very specific order of butterfly pea flower tea with 1 cube of white sugar, 1 mint leaf within a minimalistic see-through tea set

-definetely a fan of berliner or a good chilled charlotte

-Indulges in conversations with simeon, solomon, barbatos and luke like the classy boys they are

-Drinking their tea like that, gossipping like mid 19th century wives in england

-probably laughs at the more energetic people

-Has the other guests at the parlour just senting him in something sweet only for their hearts to be crushed as asmo hands the sweet gifts to his sweet beloved younger brother

||Beelzebub

-You know why he’s here

-Asmo’s personal pastry trash can

-Hungry baby is eating a whole cake by himself ❤️

-Living the dream on his 4th cake btw

-Likes Cannoli sicillianis and Chou à la crème A.K.A profiterole or french cream puffs! He likes custard inside it

-He’s not very picky on his food but he does refuse to drink matcha tea without milk

-The type to be drinking something like dandelion root tea or peppermint tea

-This is the reason he can eat food faster. Please stop him. Please.

-Surprisingly even though he doesnt like matche he keeps green tea so he can gives some to belphie to help keep him awake.

-He tries to wear something nice so...Hahahaha Enjoy beel in a thick dark blue sweater

-He cant contain his cute little hair 🥺

-Uses a tea cup the same size as a mug and a dinner plate instead of a dessert plate

-Gets destracted by the pretty flowers and thinks of lilith ✨

||Belphegor

-Im sorry...Private booth with a couch please?

-He likes nuts cause they make up for his lack of serotonin and plus sleepy

-His tea is either chamomile to calm him or something like green tea to wake him up

-Only drinks green tea that beel gives cause beel knows exactly what to wake belphie up with

-He’s old fashioned he likes his tea in a some porcelain or clay though a preference is not a requirment

-Sleepy boy like private booths and resting himself on beel who’s just munching away but when he’s awake he does join the mid 19th century wives group

-Talks shit about most of the brother, except beel cause beel though a demon is still angelic.

-Has a great time there cause he’s reminded of when him and his twins were playing tea parties

-Does not dress for the occassion cause who gives a fuck

-Has told stories or at least recalled the times that lilith has made them pretend there was tea in the cup while they tried to point out that there was in fact none

||Simeon

-Polite boy that helps set up some of the servers and praises them

-ASSAM TEA YOU CANT CONVINCE ME ON THIS. He loves the taste honestly and he thinks he likes it so much more when there’s milk with it. Likes 1 cube of sugar on it and likes it bit more on the hotter side.

-Another one who enjoys sandwiches more than pastries though please dont tell luke.

-Likes the tea party so much that he wants to host one with luke so they can invite micheal and the other angels.

-Wears something nice but still a bit more appropriate.

-Probably the next host for the tea party

-does not shit talk or gossip bad stuff be he likes to join the conversations

-Adores watching luke pick flowers at the indoor garden

||Luke

-He is such a grateful person that he also brings his own sugar cookies ❤️

-He likes scones!!!! he likes em with lots of cream and blueberries

-The type to drink some sweet tea however he swears by candyleaf as the ultimate drink for him. If there’s no candy leaf though he can always go for fruit teas and something that kicks like orange blossom sponge cakes 🥺

-Dont look at me like he wouldnt play with the flowers and explore the indoor gardens while simeon calls him and he’s already back with sweet butterflies crowding him like the most adorable angel ever

-Joins the adult table cause...h-he’s...he’s old enough 🥺👉👈 (It’s really cause simeon needs to take care of him)

-He might not like devildom but he can say that the ambiance in that place wasnt absolutely breathtaking

-Wants to recreate the sweets here as well

||Diavolo

-The host of the party and is currently tending to everyone in conversation

-He thinks he should do these more often due to how successful they are in bringing everyone together

-Brought barbatos cause only barbatos can make his special tea since the ingridients are rare to fine

-His tea? Bolivia black✨his tastes are complex yes I know

-goes on board with orange food and dark chocolate. He is so exquisite, bro. An orange-scented short bread with finely tempered dark chocolate is the best thing he pairs with that black tea.

-Has a grand time trying to give luci some of his sweet shortbread but ultimately the other demon refuses 😔

-Just fucking say yes, luci. Stop being a pussy already

Taglist: @yamaguchi-stan (Special thanks to her for my knowledge in this stuff),

#Obey me lucifer x reader #obey me mammon x reader #obey me leviathan x reader #obey me beelzebub x reader #obey me belphegor x reader #obey me asmodeus x reader #obey me satan x reader #obey me: shall we date? #obey me brothers #obey me shall we date #obey me beelzebub #obey me x reader

[voidcat]

Intrusion

– 3: level 5 of friendship (wc: 1.8k)

prev ; next ; m.list

a/n: a filler-ish type of character. according to my ao3 a/n i kinda felt out of this chapter by the time i sat down to write so yea,,, + the text copy pasted from ao3 again so bolds and italics may be gone.

>[Hey I’ll go to the café a little earlier and sit around for a while. I’ll send you the address and you can meet me there.]

>[btw they don’t only serve pastry so if u r hungry after practice, you can eat there.]

>[k bye see ya]

You were up hours before you received a message from Iwaizumi. A simple “Good Morning.” blinking at you from the corner of your eye. Sending a short reply, you went back to your book. The house completely silent, save for your creaking footsteps; your parents have already left, typical as always.

It was odd for you to be up before your alarm. You brush the possibilities off, trying not think too much about it. The air feels nice and the chirping of birds isn’t exactly distracting, I might as well do some reading. That is how you decided to begin your day, pushing all your thoughts aside and entering a brand new world.

The heavy silence starting to weight on you after a while, you change your clothes, send these texts to Iwaizumi and head out.

Finding a good spot to sit by the window side, in case Iwaizumi cannot find the place, you order a drink as you pick your book up where you left off. You must’ve dozed off because you don’t realize him until he sits down.

“Hey.”

“Oh, hi. Glad you could make it.” It’s weird to see him without the school uniform now. The tshirt looks like he changed into it after practice. The jacket hanging from his seat and the bag by his side, both carrying the trademark colors for Aoba Johsai sports clubs indicating your assumption further. His face seems redder than usual, he must’ve left a short while ago.

You stare at one another for a moment. “So, how was practice?”

“As usual. We tried switching positions and had some 2-against-2 matches a little.”

“Ah, that… sounds good? I think. No, maybe a bit intense too? I’m not sure.” Shaking your head as you speak, you can hear him chuckle, probably at you.

“How about your morning?”

“As usual.”

“So you do wake up before noon on weekends, huh.” You can’t help but smile at that.

“Except for that part, then.” You look up to find him smiling at you warmly. This only makes your smile bigger.

One of the staff approaches your table and drops a single menu between the two of you. When will cafes stop assuming two people of the opposite sex as a couple and bring only one menu?..

Iwaizumi makes a gesture, signaling you to take a look and choose first.

“You go ahead, I have some inside information on their products.” You say with a smile as if you really are sharing a top secret. What’s up with the never ending smiles today? It couldn’t possibly be because of meeting with him, right? No way. And yet, the smiles appear before your face all natural, feeling familiar; so you let it keep happening. Change once in a while never killed anybody.

Eyes wandering around, examining each furniture, each plant, the expressions people wear; trying to distinct the source of each smell, guessing what it is, you wait for Iwaizumi to choose. The air is calm, no one is too loud and you can hear relaxing songs playing through the speakers. I hope the harmony of this place isn’t disturbed during the rush hours, you can’t help but think.

Getting tired of the pastel ambiance after a while, you divert your gaze back to Iwaizumi. Only to see a frustrated face staring at the menu he’s holding. He almost looks like it insulted him or better yet, attacked him. Your hand reaches to it before you can realize. You lower the menu a little.

“Need help?” He almost looks embarrassed to nod does it any way.

“Yeah, I’m torn between Americano and filter coffee… But what exactly is the difference between the two?” The excitement inside you hard to conceal, your hands jump into the air, digits spread wide.

“Oh, oh! I know this!” The look Iwaizumi gives you makes you stop. He seems… at ease. He has one of these small smiles you’ve witnessed before. There’s also a hint of something in his eyes, a gleam is there sure and a little bit of playfulness, but also something else you can’t put your finger on. Whatever it is, it suits him and you’d like to see him like this more often. You shake your head at your last thought.

“No, don’t give me that look. I only know about types of coffee because one of my friends is a caffeine addict.” And so you start to talk about different types of coffee, milk and espresso ratios, all in detail.

Five minutes into speedtalking about coffee and you give up at the look of defeat you are met with. “Just order Americano, you seem the type any way.”

“Hey, what’s that supposed to mean?” You ignore the question.

A minute of waiting and awkward stare passes, then another minute of ordering is added to the pile. Iwaizumi, following your advice and ordering Americano, you asking for chai latte and the ‘cake of the day’. You two fall back into silence.

No conversation starters coming into mind, your eyes keep wandering around. Stealing glances at him once in a while, only for the both of you to make eye contact and immediately diverting your gazes, the unsettling silence starts to take its toll.

“I… I need to use the restroom.” You dash out before he can say anything, hoping the door you saw earlier does lead to the restroom. Splashing water to your face to calm your nerves, why would my nerves even be not calm in the first place??, you slowly head out and pray to whatever force out there that your orders have arrived.

You’re either lucky or you’ve used up your daily dose of luck because your prayers seem to be answered. The steam coming from your beverages is numbing and the cake looks heavenly to you. Light cream between the layers and on top, surrounded with fresh fruits and some jam spilled over the plate to make a twirling shape for a good presentation…

There are two sets of cutlery.

Because bringing a single menu was not enough and they just had to bring two sets of cutlery, still assuming you’re a couple. Not to worry, it’s not worth losing your cool over. You take a deep breath and sit as you breathe down, a not so genuine smile plastered on your face.

“So, how is the coffee?”

“Good. I suppose you were right about ‘my type’” he does air quotes as he speaks. Another smile breaks free of your mask.

“If it’s any consolation, I usually prefer coffee without sweeteners, so it is a little my type too.” A knowing nod at that.

“And the cake?..”

“Well, it looks good. You can try if you want, they did bring another fork anyway.” He doesn’t too eager at that. Cutting a part of the cake and putting it to one side of the plate, you shrug and start eating.

An easy flow of conversation comes after.

It starts with something that catches your eye in the street, starting to look through the window and creating fun little scenarios, the air around you gets warmer.

Excitingly pointing at a cat passing by, Iwaizumi learns how fond of cats you are, even so that you have one at home.

Inspecting the trees nearby and trying to guess what species, you find out he has an eye for it. He knows most of the trees and flowers out there.

He asks you your favorite genre to play on piano and in return you ask him his preferred sports drink. It goes like this. Beverages already drunk, cake long eaten, you two get lost in small things and what-nots.

The sun at the top, shining through and drowning the world under its golden light, everything seems to be at peace. Not a single customer around talking too loud, or maybe they do but you’re too out of it to notice… The temperature just right, your thoughts at bay, all harmless. Almost as if it’s a regular weekend day-out, the way it feels so familiar.

Feeling relaxed and loosened up, ready to doze off to sleep at any given moment, you slowly find yourself getting lost in pale green eyes, and vice versa.

Whatever unseen force that was holding the entire place, including you, in a calm trance, falls apart at the sudden sound of an unwelcome beep.

Both of you reaching out to your phones, you see a notification alert

Staring at your screen for a while, a sincere smile blooms on your face, giddy with excitement and happy, you feel unstoppable at that very moment.

“Good news I hope. Care to share?” Iwaizumi’s words reach your ears a few seconds too late. Still holding your phone with both hands grinning like an idiot now, you shake your head a little.

“You need to reach level 5 of friendship with me to access this story, sorry.” You can see him laughing lightly at the back of his hand.

“What’s so funny?”

“Oh nothing. It’s just… I expected at least a level 10.” It’s your turn to laugh now, and so it seems.

“You’ve listened to me playing the piano. That gives you a 5 level headstart already.”

“You’re really that secretive about that?” All that joy from a moment ago has died down and replaced with confusion. You avoid his eyes and focus on a spot near him again, just like the first time.

“Secretive is not the best choice of words. More like… insecure? I guess, I’m not sure.”

“Well, that’s just dumb.”

“I- What? Excuse me?!”

“I’ve said what I said. You already play well and only a fool wouldn’t notice the way you give your all as you play. There is no logical reason for you to be insecure about that.”

“Yes but- you see…” Words die out at your throat, hand hanging in the air.

Another thing you learn about Iwaizumi Hajime right then and there. He is honest and as harsh as truth can be.

You wonder if he is like that all the time, if he is as open when it comes to himself. Or does he hide behind a façade like the rest of the world.

Noticing how tense you are getting, Iwaizumi ends your misery at last, asking about the book you were reading and you two fall back into another quiet chatter of everything and nothing until you  call it a day.

#intrusion #haikyuu!! #haikyuu #iwaizumi hajime #iwaizumi hajime x reader #iwaizumi hajime x you #iwaizumi x reader #iwaizumi x you #slow burn #iwaizumi fanfic #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x you #haikyuu!! x you #haikyuu!! x reader #im lazy to tag so #thats all

[katarrinskey-archive]

Tag games

So, my asocial ass was tagged in 2 of those tag games by @arofili |thank you btw, it’s very nice of u :з|. I decided that I might as well do both since I usually don’t talk about myself much (or at all, lol)

Name: Kat

Gender: female

Height: 5'5″ (≈165cm)

Sexuality: acespec lesbian

Favorite Animal: Dolphins, cats and seals

Cats or Dogs: Both and neither. I’ve got two cats and a dog and I love them a lot, but they r all a nightmare in their own way 

Current Time: 8:23pm

Dream Job: My life would be so much easier if i had a solid answer to that, lol. Probably something art related

When I Made This Blog: April 2018

Why I Made This Blog: I wanted a place to post my art without having to deal with real life acquaintances, i guess? Ended up going into a year long art block couple of months after that

Reason For URL: I once knew a g[rl that called me “Katarinski”, for no reason whatsoever. We weren’t even close, she was my classmate at a time, but i might have had a bit of a crush on her and I was questioning my identity pretty badly and the name felt new and exciting (cause i was never called that before and i’ve never heard anyone being called that before), so i adopted it as my artist name. Basically, i had that url for maybe two years longer then i have this blog, lmao

Followers: 90

1. What is the color of your hairbrush? I actually have quite a bunch of those, my two favorite ones have r pink and blue and green in a weirdy pattern and shiny rainbow-ish white-ish perl-ish texture.It’s really hard to explain, lol

2. Name a food you never eat: boiled eggs r my personal nemesis, especially hard-boiled ones. I only eat those when they r in a salad and cut into very small pieces so texture doesn’t bother me as much

3. Are you typically too warm or too cold? Too warm 

4. What were you doing 45 minutes ago? I pretty much wasted my whole day scrolling the feed of various social media

5. What’s your favorite candy bar? Milk chocolate in pretty much all shapes and forms

6. Have you ever been to a professional sports game? Nope

7. What is the last thing you said out loud? promised my mum to bathe the dog tomorrow

8. What is your favorite ice cream? mint and chocolate, or simple vanilla

9. What was the last thing you had to drink? tea with honey

10. Do you like your wallet? It’s holographic pink and has stickers on it, what’s not to like?

11. What is the last thing you ate? instant noodles

12. Did you buy any new clothes last weekend? Nope

13. What’s the last sporting event you watched? I’m so very interested in sports, i’m not sure i ever consciously watched any sports at all

14. What is your favorite flavor of popcorn? I don’t like popcorn much

15. Who is the last person you sent a text message to? my best friend 

16. Ever been camping? When I was like 9, I think? Peat bogs were burning near Moscow, my dad took as away from the smoke

17. Do you take vitamins? Nope

18. Do you regularly attend a place of worship? I don’t and I never really did

19. Do you have a tan? I stay away from the sun all summer cause i am pretty pale and I won’t try my chances with burning. Besides, getting the tan means having to search for a new foundation shade to use in the next few months and that’s more trouble than it’s worth

20. Do you prefer Chinese food or pizza? Pizza. With pineapples. Cause i am that kind of a person

21. Do you drink your soda through a straw? I don’t like sparkling drinks much, so I don’t really drink soda.I’ll use a straw for milkshakes tho

22. What color socks do you usually wear? I’ve got a lot of neutral socks, but my favs r dark blue with cat faces

23. Do you ever drive above the speed limit? I can’t drive and i am not planning to learn to

24. What terrifies you? night forests, weird sound, strangers on dark streets, whatever my imagination gifts me with after watching a horror movie

25. Look to your left, what do you see? My bed.with a cat on it. Cause they r everywhere

26. What chore do you hate most? mopping the floor

27. What do you think of when you hear an Australian accent? how bad i am at recognising accents

28. What’s your favorite soda? do not have one

29. Do you go in a fast food place or just hit the drive thru? In

30. What’s your favorite number? I don’t have one, but there is something weirdly pleasing in all odd numbers

31. Who’s the last person you talked to? my mum

32. Favorite meat? Chicken

33. Last song you listened to? Ashes to ashes by David Bowie

34. Last book you read? Been trying to reread LOTR for months, but i only have the attention span for fanfiction these days. Last one I actually finished? Silmarillion, after being at war with it for half of a year

35. Favorite day of the week? Saturday

36. Can you say the alphabet backwards? I can hardly say it in the right order. I’m supposed to know two but i barely remember any, at these point they r just mashed together

37. How do you like your coffee? sweet and fancy, with syrups and whipped cream, if that’s an option

38. Favorite pair of shoes? warm knee-high winter boots

39. Time you usually get up? sometime between 10 am and 3pm cause my sleep schedule is trash

40. What do you prefer, sunrise or sunset? both

41. How many blankets on your bed? 1

42. Describe your kitchen plates: white with little blue flowers for everyday life. Solid black for fancy occasions

43. Describe your kitchen at the moment: black and yellow

44. Do you have a favorite alcoholic drink? I don’t drink often, but if i do i will chose red wine

45. Do you play cards? Nope

46. What color is your car? Don’t have one, don’t want one

47. Can you change a tire? Nope

48. Favorite state or province? I don’t go places, I don’t have an opinion 

49. Favorite job you’ve had? Local lazy bitch was about to search for a first job when the pandemic decided she’d better stay home. So I’m currently unemployed and never had a job, how fun

50. I tag: @actuallymiriel @flowercloaca @sessenaa Feel free to ignore or pick one of the two

#tag games #personal stuff

[tgwltw]

Knight in Tarnished Armour.

This was something that I worked on last year (according to the date I last touched this document was September 2017) and I decided to just post it here and see how it goes from there. Just so you know, I am not really sure where I am going with this but I know that I want to see this going somewhere at least. Hope you enjoy!

p/s: lemme know what you think about this, btw. If you want a continuation and all that sort, just drop by a comment. Otherwise, it’s fine!

Summary: Handsome billionaire Jason Todd-Wayne discarded Y/N L/N after mind blowing nights together a few years ago and your dreams of a future with him shattered just like your heart. Can your knight in tarnished armour return to your loving arms once he discovers just how big the mistake he had made is?

“Are you sure you can handle this?” Your best friend, Cassandra, asks as she helps you carry the remaining boxes in to your new small apartment. You have used up the last of the money you have received to get this apartment and paid for two months’ worth of rent. You give her a small, weak smile as you nod your head.

“I really have no other choice, Cass.” You tell her as you look around the apartment. To be quite honest, it probably should not even be called an apartment. The one-room consisted of a very small, square kitchen, an even smaller living room and two doors that lead to an equally small bedroom and bathroom. Everything about the place is small but it was cheap. You know you are mostly going to end up sharing your bed with him but it was better than the hellhole you shared with those people previously. “Even if the bed doesn’t fit, there’s always that.” You tell yourself, staring at the sofa - you can definitely make do with that.

Cassandra sighs as she places the boxes down by the door to the bedroom, wincing when she finally takes note of the place. When you had told her you had gotten an apartment, she had expected something that resembled one… not whatever this place is. “Babe, are you sure you can’t get in touch with his dad or something? I mean, this place…” She trails off, biting her lower lip, realising her mistake just a little too late. “Sorry.” Cassandra furrows her eyebrows at the glare you sent her.

You run a hand through your hair before apologising to her as well. You should not have taken your anger out at her - she didn’t deserve it. After all, she wasn’t the one who made that choice; back then, you had been too naive, too young. “I haven’t had a wink of rest these past few days and Mark has had a high fever and it kept him up most nights and I,” You break your sentence off, shaking your head. Now was not the time to have a pity party for yourself - you still have a lot of things to do! “I just have a lot of things right now and I can’t afford to take a break.” 

Cassandra throws an arm around you, pulling you close to her and you lean against her shoulder, forever feeling thankful and grateful to have a best friend like her. “I shouldn’t have said anything in the first place.” She rubs her hand on your arm soothingly. Cassandra knew that the subject of Mark’s dad is a very touchy one for you but sometimes she really could not help it. She has never met him before and she has been by your side for almost your entire life - with the exception of the time you had moved out of Gotham - but now that you are back and with a son, she cannot help but wonder sometimes. 

Mark is a very sweet, energetic child even if he is a little bit clumsy sometimes. Not only that, Cassandra is sure that when Mark grows up, he is probably going to be breaking a lot of hearts just by his looks. “Do you want me to drop you off at the daycare? It’s almost about time to pick Mark up, right?” Cassandra glances at her watch and you nod your head, pulling away from Cassandra.

Moving had taken almost half of the day and you have yet to unpack any boxes so you are probably going to have to try and get those done after Mark’s done at the daycare. You tried your hardest to shove all the unwanted and unpleasant memories that Cassandra’s question brought and give her a wary smile. “Yes, please.” You murmur. “Thank you so much for this, Cass.” You give her another quick hug, one that Cassandra returned tightly.

Cassandra smiles warmly at you when she pulls back. “That’s what friends are for, Y/N. Besides you have done so much for me too…” She trails off, shaking her head, not wanting to open another can of worms. “Let’s get Mark then.” 

A knock resounds throughout the office, snapping Jason out of his train of thoughts. He looks at the door and a moment later, his personal assistant, Kori, pokes her head in. “Mr. Jason, your brother is on line one for you.” She informs him and Jason takes that chance to look at his own telephone that is currently blinking. 

“Which brother?”

Kori smiles. “Mr. Richard.”

Jason rolls his eyes at the smile on Kori’s face before nodding his head, dismissing Kori as he reaches for the phone. “What’s up, Dick?” 

“You neglected to pick up two of my calls causing me to have to call your office line and you have the decency to greet me with a what’s up, Dick?” Dick grumbles into the receiver and Jason chuckles, opening his drawer. He takes out his mobile phone and true to Dick’s words, there are two missed calls displayed on the screen. He drops the phone on top of the reports he had been reading.

“I had a lot of work today.” Jason points out. He normally keeps his phone away whenever he is in the office, opting for less distractions and unfortunately for Dick, this morning he had a bunch of papers to go through and meetings to sit through. “You have a reason for calling me other than being smart?”

Dick chortles. “There really is no winning with you, Jay.” Jason doesn’t need to be in front of Dick to know that his older brother had rolled his eyes when he said those words. So Jason hums instead, spinning a random pen on his fingers. “I need you to come up here for the ceremony and the official opening.” 

Jason frowns. Going back to Gotham? “Must I really?” If it is up to him, Jason would rather not set his feet in Gotham ever again. “I thought we agreed for you to be the face - there is a reason why you are the brawn and I am the brains.” Jason takes a jab, causing Dick to laugh.

“Some things are really out of my control, Jay. I tried though but I really have no idea who tipped them of but because of that, it’s getting rather vicious around here so please be careful and try not to get in to too many scandals.” Dicks sighs despondently and Jason nods his head even if he is aware that Dick will not be able to see it. “Just come to Gotham. We all miss you, you know.”

Jason tries to recall the last time he had gone back for a visit and can’t seem to recall a time at all. The two of them exchanged a few more words after that: “Damian’s got another pet this time”, “But he already has a lot”, “He wants to open a shelter he says”, “Tim is annoyed by how Damian is starting to become taller than him”, “His happiness is short-lived”, “Tim decided to go on a milk-drinking binge”, “The poor boy”.

Jason sighs as he turns his chair to look out of the window. The conversation he had with Dick got him thinking. Going back to Gotham means facing his fears, facing the object of both his dream and his nightmare. Going back to Gotham almost means that there is a high chance that he might bump in to you and he really is not sure if he is ready to see you - if he wants to see you. A scowl appears on his handsome face as he turns around to face his table and he rings Kori. 

“Yes, Mr. Jason?” Kori steps in the room. 

Jason looks at his personal assistant - out of all the assistants he has had, Kori is definitely the one he likes the most, mostly because she would not stand for his bullshit at all and he swallows the sigh that is about to leave, hoping he will not regret this decision he is about to make. “Cancel the remaining meetings - postpone them, move them - do whatever. I am going to be taking two weeks off effective immediately.” He informs Kori who is staring at him in shock. 

For as long as Kori has been working, she knows that he has never taken a day off from work ever and Kori has worked for him for about four years now. 

“It’s not what you are thinking, if at all,” Jason assures her. “I have been called to Gotham - that was why my brother called - so I am going to need those two weeks off. I haven’t been home in a long time too.” But even as he said that, a tiny voice at the back of his mind spoke up, “you went to Gotham five years ago, Jason. Remember those two nights?” - and he immediately pushes those thoughts away, keeping them locked at the very back of his mind. 

Kori finally smiles at him. “Alright, I will postpone the rest of your meetings and will reschedule everything else accordingly. Two weeks off right?” Kori knows she is going to have a lot of trouble when talking to his clients later but Jason wants what he wants so Kori will definitely have to make sure he gets what he wants. 

Jason dismisses Kori once she is done with repeating the orders he had given - he told her to take the rest of the day off too seeing as Jason is going to go back to his apartment soon to pack his clothes - and he wonders how much Gotham has changed and as much as he tried to keep his mind off of you, he really couldn’t help himself.

He wonders just how you are currently doing right now.

#Jason Todd #Jason Todd imagine #Jason Todd imagines #Jason Todd x reader #Jason Todd x reader imagine #Jason Todd x reader imagines #Red Hood #Red Hood imagine #Red Hood imagines #Red Hood x reader #Red Hood x reader imagine #Red Hood x reader imagines #Dick Grayson #dc #dc comics #dc comics imagines #dc imagine #dc imagines #dc comics imagine #dc comics universe #dceu #dcu #Knight in tarnished armour #KITA

[royvdhelart]

So...as I've been sick for the last week, I kind of needed something to cheer me up a bit and something to get the Art-passion flowing again. So, I decided to finally redo Emil's reference sheet, as I never liked the old one, after designing him a new outfit <3

This was a bunch of work but boy, I can not recall having this much fun with a drawing and I'm actually hella proud of it for once :D I hope you like it as well!

--- Just to be clear btw: This Art is NOT for free use. ---

Callname: Emil/Baltazar Full-Name: Baltazar Emil A'zam Duman Jaren Qazir Languages: Common, Dwarfish (future: draconic)

Age: 26, born on the first day of June Sex/Gender: Male Height: 1,95m/6'4 Race: Human Class: (Lore) Bard (level 9) (future: Draconic sorcerer)

Background: Entertainer/Noble Sexuality: Bi-Romantic

Favorite Instrument: Violin. Alignment/Personality: Neutral Good, optimistic, Drama Queen, charismatic, polite, group-mom, party-guy, curious, creative. Flaws: Drama Queen, has a big mouth and turns into an awkward/clumsy dork when he has a crush on someone. More about his family: https://sta.sh/014wc8gu8y2p Background: Baltazar was born on the first day of June in the city Setus. He was the 7th and youngest son of a wealthy merchant family, having 4 brothers ( (35) Amin, (33)Kareem, (30)Jarah, (27)Gabriel, and ( and 2 sisters (Farah (31) and Iris (35) above him.  Baltazar had always been the "runt of the litter". Tall but lanky, Emil wasn't strong, and always out searching for trouble. This often caused him to clash with his parents, who really wished Emil would become more serious instead of going on about silly adventures and hanging around in inn's every night. Actually just fearing for his well-being.

As a proper noblemen's son Baltazar was learned etiquette from a young age, getting schooled by a wise old teacher (Nazim), who had years of experience teaching his older brothers and sisters. Emil wasn't the best student however and caused quite the frustration to his teacher. He skipped classes, pulled tricks on his teacher and rarely did the work he was expected to or find some kind of way to do his tasks with the least effort possible. Emil was much too busy learning plays out of his head, creating new songs or just dreaming about what it would be like to be actually free, to travel the lands, slay monsters, be a hero, to do such boring and repetitive tasks. It didn't matter anyway, he was the youngest, he would one day be married of to a rich woman/man and that would be it. He often worried about this future, a future, which in his opinion, could only become boring. The moments he spent on stage, telling people silly stories when he played his violin, were the moments he actually felt alive, at those moments he could feel a kind of power flowing through him, which could vaguely be described as a warmth but different. To him, it seemed that all that they wanted to do is take that from him, make him "more serious" as he would never honor his family's name as a simple entertainer. One day Emil had pushed his parents too far, he missed his teacher's lessons again and had a big fight with his father. All Emil's frustration and fear for the future came out at that point. Which ended with Emil, angerly saying that he was going to leave the city and that he would prove them that he would become worth something, he would become a great entertainer, a Hero even, his name would become known! With that, he packed his stuff and left the next morning. Quite quickly Emil found out that traveling was definitely not as easy or fun as he expected and regretted his decision quite quickly as he started to run out of gold, the city Setus was mostly surrounded by desert and small villages, where there was no way for him to make any profit. After traveling for days, he decided that he really wasn't ready to cross an entire dessert after having a nasty run-in with Goblins. He finally reached a cross point between three larger cities. He decided to travel between the cities, to try out work as an entertainer to earn some gold. For a few years, he played music at inns, took on small roles in plays and did some odd jobs to earn some extra gold. In these years he discovered the kind of power within himself again, a power which he studied and could control more and more each day as he got mentored by another bard called "Rafael". Who saw potential in him. Eventually, he learned how to control magic with his voice, movements, and music. Even though he enjoyed entertaining, with his new found powers and being able to do whatever he wanted, he realized he became somewhat stuck there, unable to grow, he was running out of ideas for songs or tales. But what was he supposed to do? He couldn't go back home and wasn't confident enough of his abilities yet to go on actual adventures alone, as he and Rafael split up after a year, his powers seemed mostly passive, supporting at most. Contemplating his options, he almost stumbled over a black panther which seemed to have appeared out of nowhere. He looked back at the table which the large black cat was laying against, sitting around it he saw what could only be described as a perfect example of a knight in shining armor drinking a large pint of... milk? and a younger somewhat odd hooded figure, bright red with a large bird emblem depicted on his back in gold. Emil was immediately intrigued by the curious figures, decided to buy them a round and started talking to them. The knight was apparently the Paladin called Adil Fahd, somewhat of a folk hero, who he actually recognized by name as he had heard it before. The hooded young man was called Yashan, a Phoenix sorcerer from far away, this apparently meant he knew a lot about setting things and himself... on fire, he was apparently on a holy mission to find a religious artifact called the Sun-Stone. He spends the rest of the evening talking with the adventurers and eventually convinced them to let them join their group. A few months later, they met their newest members to the party "Kakaah" a odd but smart Kenku Rogue and a sassy Fighter called Ustrom and with the party complete they would face many adventures, from fighting as gladiators in the area of a savage dwarf Island, to Dyeing Ogers hair to get out of trouble, surviving many of Adil's bad ideas, dangerous sea-trips, a trip to the Underdark, meeting the Evil beholder called Kazejux, retrieving priceless artifacts,  fighting a Demon called Kalahai who is wanting to take over the world... and many more and many more more to come. Extra/Random Facts about Emil: - Emil is a very charismatic and likes to flirt but is absolutely terrified of sex because of a mix of bad/silly experience and anxiety. He gets nervous about the subject and panics as soon as things become too hot and heavy. - Emil has a huge weakness for smart and dorky, guys/girls <3 - He learned the tips and tricks about being a Bard from a Bard called Rafael, with whom he has a somewhat competitive-love/hate friend-relationship as their friendship got a little complicated at the end of their showbusiness-partnership. Rafael is a stereotypical bard, very charismatic, party-animal and somewhat of a nymphomaniac. - Emil used to own a tiger when he was younger, who he shared with his brother Gabriel, which is supposed to be depicted on his bracers. Gabriel, after being reunited with Emil again 3 years after Emil left home, decided to also engrave his name into the bracers, in a way, so he'd be with him on his adventures. -Emil grew up with two mothers and a father, his biological mother is called Anjah, she is smart, smoll and scary, his second mother is called Dolunay, Cool, collected and wise, and his father's name is Azam who is intimidating but too sweet for his own good. His parents are in a Poly-romantic relationship and don't appreciate the "He is rich so he has more than one wife"-talk/ habit, the relationship is shared between all of them and they all love each other equally.

- Aside from the strings, his Violin is made out of Wood, Gold, and Ivory. It's called "Yarro" and is named after the Yarrow Plant. - He was thought to shoot his crossbow by his older brother Amin, who is good at handling most weapons known to that region, and an avid collector. Currently, Baltazar owns a magic Heavy Crossbow which is able to cast the spell "Tenser's transformation". - Emil is familiar with wearing drag or being scarcely clothed on stage as he used to be a part of a show in an "Entertainers-bar" for about a year. His drag is now one of his costumes next to his dessert robes... this job wasn't one of his favorites... but it was where Rafael discovered him, which would change his life forever. (He is dangerous with a pair of heels.) - Emil recently acquired a sentient cape, called Thanatos, a cured copper dragon with a ton of attitude. He allows Baltazar to Fly, be resistant to fire and look very extra. - His feather ear-ring is supposed to resemble a phoenix feather, however, he has no clue if it's real, as he bought it on a market from a somewhat sketchy guy. - Emil lost his finger for a while after using a magic artifact to save his ass... (Future: luckily he was able to get it back!) - Emil has a birthmark on his left hip. - (When compared to the real world) Emil would have a combination of Arabic/Indian/maybe a bit of Egyptic heritage. - Emil Knows gods exist but isn't necessarily a follower of any. More Baltazar: - https://romyvdhel-art.deviantart.com/art/OC-Spectrum-Meme-DnD-Characters-724820026 - https://romyvdhel-art.deviantart.com/art/DND-Reference-Baltazar-Emil-Qazir-707607613 - https://romyvdhel-art.deviantart.com/art/DnD-Sketchdump-VIII-717548901

#baltazar #bard #cape #emil #extra #fantasy #gaylord #metrosexualfruitcake #human #male #man #oc #drawing #illustration #reference #dnd #romyvdhel #human bard #Thanatos #thanatos aka emils cape #reference sheet #dnd dungeons and dragons #Dungeons and Dragons #dnd desert campaign #lore_bard #Qazir #digital art #art

[poiregourmande]

2, 4 and 9? (I love your blog btw!) x

thanks so much, that’s so nice of you to say!

What’s your favourite episode?

ok i answered this the other day and it was (and still is) the bacon episode, for the sheer amount of Adam screentime. but now BUT NOW the filipino pork episode OH MY GOD. that last location was the best place they ever visited, it was a family feast with the best vibes ever AND they never looked more like boyfriends ever before so i guess these two eps are tied in my heart

Do you ship Standrew? If so, why?

LISTEN. listen. this would have had a very different answer if i had answered this 24 hours ago. so i started out in the fandom by shipping standrew, of course, but then i discovered stadamdrew and for a while i loved both equally, but i quickly became disgruntled with standrew because adam is either left out or used as a plot device or belittled. BUT THE FILIPINO PORK EPISODE!!!!! THIS HAPPENED and it reignited the standrew flame in me (of course it doesn’t mean that i don’t ship stadamdrew anymore, but he was sadly not included in this interaction so yeah)

Who’s your favourite chef?

i was hoping someone would ask me that omg thanks! i have THOUGHTS about this. In no particular order: 

- George Mavrothalassitis, the third chef in the Hawaian fish episode. He was so nice and interesting, i feel like i would have the best time just chatting and drinking beer with him (and it looks like Andrew would agree with me

- David Chang (Korea BBQ Ribs and the 3rd fried chicken place). He’s just so cool and funny, and he swears even more than Andrew, and he’s so passionate about his art I wanna be his friend

- Neil ‘Bigmista’ Strawder, the first chef in the BBQ ribs episode. He’s so chill, AND he checked out the show enough to prepare a BBQ fact, he’s just amazing

- Chef Marilyn (1st Mac n Cheese place). Listen. She’s a mama. She’s the loveliest, she cleaves open cans of milk like nobody’s business and she rubbed their tummies omg. You just know the main ingredient in all her dishes is love

ask me worth it related questions!

#ask games #buzzfeed worth it #standrew #stadamdrew