#talk of death

[whumpshaped]

whumptober 8

prompt list masterlist

tw terminal condition, talk of death, past trauma, lashing out, emotional whump, death wish sort of

"It's all for nothing."

"How can you say that–"

"How can you not?" Whumpee snapped, smacking Caretaker's hand away hard enough to make them hiss and drop the pills they had been holding. "How can you not see that this is ridiculous? Pointless? How can you keep pretending all the fucking time? For weeks? For months?"

"I, I'm not pretending–" They dropped to their knees in a desperate attempt to grab the pills rolling in every which direction, trying to hunt them all down before they ended up under the bed or the nightstand. "I'm not pretending..."

Whumpee rolled their eyes and let out a heavy sigh. "You look pitiful like that, you know?"

Caretaker didn't react. They arranged all the meds in their palm neatly, counting and recounting several times to make sure they'd gotten all of them. Whumpee could see the tears gathering in their eyes and eventually trickling down their cheeks, and if they weren't so preoccupied with their own problems, they might've felt bad.

"You look like me," they went on. "I used to kneel like that next to Whumper's bed, crying and begging. Not so they'd take placebo, but so they wouldn't put me in a position to have to take placebo later on."

"It's not placebo," they sniffled.

"So what is it, Caretaker? Hm? I'm not improving at all. I'm only getting worse. Yeah, actually, you're right, maybe placebo would at least work. Somewhat. At least it'd grant me the illusion of working."

"P-please, you have to take them... The, the doctor said–"

"I'm tired of this conversation." Whumpee looked up at the ceiling, suddenly more exhausted than angry. This was a stupid argument to have on their deathbed. They didn't want to argue anymore at all. "Just let me die. Please. I'm tired, in general."

They could hear Caretaker place all the pills on the nightstand one by one before standing up to refill their glass. "There's lots of evidence that this sort of combination of meds–"

"You're not even hearing me." Whumpee closed their eyes and took a deep breath, immediately triggering a coughing fit. Caretaker was by their side in an instant, rubbing their back and gently hushing them. "I'm done with the pills," they rasped. "I'm done. I... I don't want you to come back until you've changed your mind on this."

Caretaker paused. Their voice was little more than a whisper when they asked, "What?"

"I don't want to argue with you. Please don't come back just to argue."

The silence that followed was deafening. Whumpee couldn't imagine why it was so hard to accept this one thing. It was their life, wasn't it? And their death. They should've been able to decide the conditions.

"Okay," Caretaker breathed, broken and defeated. "No– no more medication."

"No more talk of it either."

"No more talk."

Whumpee took their hand in their own, gently kissing the place where they'd hit them earlier. "Thank you. For at least trying to understand."

~

general drabbles taglist: @ashh-ed @whumpsday @whump-queen @the-scrapegoat @hidden-dreamland @rosewriteswhump @dismemberment-on-a-tuesday-night @whumpkinpie @delicateprincepaper @whumppmuhw @whump-em @cyborg0109 @morning-star-whump @justanotherlokifan @2in1whump @lthrboy @justletmereadmywhump @florissimps

#zi's whumptober scribbles #whump #whump drabble #terminal condition #talk of death #past trauma #lashing out #emotional whump #sickfic #death wish

[captain-lessship]

Call Me: Two V Two

You weren’t surprised by this meeting, the first of which you decided to sit in on. A few questioning glances fell in you. Compared to L, you look normal. A simple shirt and short combo paired with a pair of slippers that were forgotten on the floor. 

Only similarities were the slightly dark under eye bags that you rewarded after many nights you spent awake, waiting for him, and you hadn’t the energy to cover the bags with concealer, and the odd sitting position. You sat slouched with one leg tucked up to your chest, where you rested your head on your knee, carefully watching the Task force, mentally sizing them up. 

There was a sound of shock throughout the room when L said there’s a possibility there might be two Kira’s. No one really saw this coming and questions radiated from everyone. You looked from the officers to look at L.

Discussion rang as L and the Taskforce talked through the information, then their attention went to you. 

“Who are you exactly?” Chief Yagami, a man who had much stress on him between the case itself and his son being a suspect, asked.

“I am V.” You said, reaching for your cup of tea that was on the table. “Like Watari, I work for Ryuzaki.” You took a sip from the cup, “I have my own set of skills outside caretaking though. They might not be as grand as the intelligence of my partner but I have never failed in my own field.”

“Which is?” 

“Let’s just call it information gathering” you set the cup down before cutting your sharp eyes to L, noticing that he wasn’t paying attention to you. “And, of course, better communication skill.” You gave L a playful teasing glance.

“You mean you’re a spy?” 

You nodded. “There’s also my weapon skills, which are impressive but don’t do much good in this situation.” 

“Knowing now that there is a high possibility that there is another Kira, I feel comfortable bringing in my own partner.” He ate the last bite of his cake, after he swallowed, he added a little tidbit of information, “She is also my wife.” 

This was the big shock to the group, which mildly offended L. “I will act as if I am not irked at your alls misconception about me.” He couldn’t hide the mild annoyance in his voice as he demanded they get back to work. 

You smiled as you stood up and walked to the chair where L sat, you pressed a gentle kiss to his cheek as you picked up his now empty plate. 

You exited the room, his guess to collect something. He smiled lightly at your caring action, still feeling the remnants of your chapstick on his cheek. In response, he reached and poured me tea in your cup, awaiting your return. 

It was late that night before he entered the bed room, noting your still form. A small sigh came from his lips. “Are you awake?”

He waited for a response, there was none. He walked to the bed and when he reached his side he noticed your out stretched hand, reaching for him in your sleep. He gently moved it and laid down, hoping he didn’t wake you.

One could only hope. You sat up in bed, a yawn left you. He moved his head to lay on your thigh, like it was instinctive.

“Are you actually going to sleep? Or are you just saying goodnight?” You whispered out. 

Hearing your voice and feeling the warmth of your body mad L realize how tired he actually was. 

“You need to take care of yourself.” You gently carded your fingers through his hair. “A good nights sleep would help you.”

“It’s very tempting.”

“I think they’re nice people.”

“They are okay. Not my least favorite team I’ve worked with.” He noted.

You looked up the ceiling, “L?”

“Yes?” 

“Do you think you’ll die?”

“Someday.”

You huffed, “I mean… be killed.”

“We all get killed. Whether by an outside force or a fault in our bodies that arise.” 

“By Kira?”

He was quiet, “I hope not.”

“I don’t know what’d I’d do if you died,” you looked down at his face, “I think I would die too.”

“That… I wouldn’t want you to die if I did. Someone has to take care of the house. Also Watari needs someone to look after. And the Lawliet Widow would be a great contender.”

“Until you’re dead, don’t call me that.”

“If I was dead I wouldn’t be calling you anything.”

You decided to change the subject, “What are we going to do when we get home?”

“Enjoy your baking and hopefully relax.”

You were surprised: He actually wanted to relax. “I think a vacation would do us some good.”

“To?”

“The Netherlands. They have great winters in the travel magazines. Or France.”

“As long as it isn’t terribly Sandy or sunny, I would be fine.”

You paused, “L. Our honeymoon was in the Bahamas.” 

“And the sand we collected there will satisfy me for a lifetime.” 

You laughed, “If I knew you hated the beach, we could have gone somewhere else.”

“You are summer incarnate.”

“What do you mean?”

“You’re like the sun. Actually let me re-phrase the earlier statement, you are more like spring. When the sun is still gentle yet still warms you.” 

“Does that make you fall and winter?”

“Does it?”

“Unforgiving on the outside yet after a while, it becomes beautiful because of the colors of the leaves and the uniqueness of the snowflakes.”

“I didn’t know we became poetic when tired.”

“Yeah,” you turned to look at the clock, “I think it foolish to be awake before eight.” 

He lifted his head from you to allow you to lay down, he then slid himself on top of you, becoming your blanket of sorts. You didn’t care as long as he sleep and he wasn’t heavy so you could still breathe. Your arms went to his back, rubbing up again.

L fell asleep because of the affection and the added lullaby of your heart. 

#l death note #l lawilet #l x reader #l lawliet x reader #death note #romantic relationships #series #talk of death #death note fanfiction #light yagami death note #light yamagi #misa amane

[sketchygainedyoursoul]

It's like the world is in a constant state between the collapse of Rome and the innovations of the 1960's and I have some Thoughts, so I decided to write them down in the form of those Tumblr comics that get 50k notes

full thing under the cut

#my art #politics #comic #commentary #don't like don't read #venting #rant #tw mild gore #talk of death

[genderless-nymph]

TW: talk of sewrslde

I really thought I'd be dead by now

I'm really struggling with living

Not in a K// myslf way

In the way that I'm not prepared for being alive

Even though I didn't di3 I feel like a part of me did

I feel like I'm just going through the motions

I don't feel present

My brain is still preparing for me to di3 since I made I plan when I was 11 to K// myslf on my 16th birthday

I had spent four years with that plan

Now it will be 8 months since my birthday tomorrow

I need that part of me back

#sewr slide #sewer slide #sewercide #tw sewerslide #talk of death #tw depressing thoughts #tw depressing stuff #tw depression #mentally unstable #depressing shit

[honeycollectswhump]

talk about death

i hate when you know death is approaching but not yet. you’ll have to watch someone you love slowly deteriorate and even if they aren’t in pain they are still slowly going to a place you can’t follow. it hurts to be left alone even though i know life has to continue. it just won’t be the same. there will be a hole left

#this is about my pet bird #but i’m still very emotional #i’ve had her for eleven years and now she’s passing of old age #it’s obvious her energy is dwindling even though she is still very comfy and not in pain #she’ll be the last budgie ill own (so far) and i’ll carry her in my heart forever #she isn’t even dead right now i just don’t know if she will make it the next few days #happy easter to me #tw death #talk of death #death of a pet #tw vent

[yarn-dragon]

Whumptober Day 16! What a normal conversation Juniper and Riot are having

#whumptober 2023 #no.16 #will you lie with me and just forget the world? #unprepared casters #fic #talk of death #grief tw #unprepared casters fic #once upon a crime #Juniper erydis #riot Hallowheart #enjoy!

[shanoaravendare]

What do you do when the person you usually pour your heart out to is the one person you can't talk to because it involves them?

I have 2 people I unreservedly trust in this world, that's it. Two people in the entire world that I honestly believe would never use anything I tell them against me. And I can't talk to either of them about what's bothering me; one because it involves them and the other because they most likely wouldn't respond well.

So once again I'm alone when I so desperately need to reach out to someone. I'm alone because years of betrayals have built up such thick barriers that I'm all but incapable of letting people in. I built a castle around my weaknesses and deeper emotions to protect myself. I just forgot to leave myself a way to leave once it was safe outside. Probably because I have so deeply believed for so long that it was never going to be safe.

Now I've found someone who makes me feel safe. And they're even more broken than I am and determined to "protect me" from the horrible person that years of abuse have made them believe they are. I know I'm never going to be what anyone is looking for, I came to terms with that when I almost married a man who was only with me because I was the bargain brand version of the person he really wanted to be with. I'm the human equivalent of ordering Pepsi and being asked "Is Coke okay?"; people will settle for me if they can't get what they really want.

I'm poor. I'm disabled. I can't have children of my own because I would have to stop taking the medicine that keeps me alive. I have, what amounts to, a pity job with no prospects of advancement. I'm a failed academic, I wasted 4 years and the money my family struggled to set aside for my education and have nothing to show for it. No one really wants someone like me, I'm nothing but a burden. My ex fiance broke off our engagement when he thought I was going to die because he didn't want to be saddled with my hospital bills after I died.

I should be fine with all of this. I should be used to it after so many years. I've been alone as long as I can remember really. There were no children in my neighborhood growing up so I turned to books to fill that void. Especially fantasy and fairytales. Worlds I could escape to and experience the things I knew I never would in the real world. Like travel, and people I could count on to have my back, and romance, and if not Happily Ever After at least Happy For Now (I'd settle for just Happy).

The world is full of wicked rulers, conniving business men, war, and hate, greed, and fear. My books prepared me for them. But there are no fairy godmothers or knights in shining armor, at least not for people like me. Cinderella stays in her ashes, Rapunzel never leaves her tower, Snow White's heart is delivered to the Evil Queen on a silver platter, Sleeping Beauty never wakes up, and people like me don't get happy endings.

Someday, I'll die alone and be forgotten. Which, ironically, is how the person I'll never be good enough for hopes their life will end.

#midlife crisis #depression #loneliness #despair #life isn't a fairytale #talk of death #anxiety #things that keep me up at night #too depressed to stay awake #too depressed to fall asleep

[isabellafoster13]

This was requested on AO3 by butterflyzilla.

Here's some LoLu fluff and angst.

I hope you enjoy!

I will Live for a Million Years (Loke x Lucy ft. Aquarius)

Loke was relaxing in the Celestial Spirit World. He was watching as Taurus and Hercules spared together, a few other celestial spirits cheering them on. Thoughts of visiting his girlfriend were rolling through his mind when he felt it. A feeling of dread that resulted in his stomach dropping to his feet. His blood ran cold and his heart all but stopped. His relaxed sitting position shifted to one of rigidness and alertness. His eyes were blown wide with fear. 

Something was wrong. Something was very wrong with Lucy. 

Without a second thought, he opened his gate himself and disappeared from the Spirit World. Within a few seconds, he appeared in Fairy Tail's infirmary. His eyes instantly fell upon his girlfriend, finding that she was lying there underneath the white covers, a wet piece of cloth over her forehead. 

Loke launched himself toward her. His eyes roamed over her form. Her skin was deathly pale and sweat covered. His hair was damp with sweat. There were visible bags underneath her closed eyelids and her breathing was heavy, coming out of her agape mouth. Loke could feel his heartbeat pick up its speed until it felt as though it could bruise his chest. He placed his hands on Lucy's shoulders and gently shook her, exclaiming, "Lucy! Lucy! Wake up, please!" 

The blonde groaned as her eyes opened, though not fully. Her eyes shifted over to him and Loke's breath caught in his throat when he saw how hazy and unfocused her brown eyes were. He gulped and blinked back tears as he said, his voice weak and already broken, "what happened?" 

The corners of Lucy's mouth twitched up in a small smile. She slowly, weakly, lifted her hand to place it on his cheek. The action was so familiar that Loke unconsciously leaned into the touch, not failing to notice that her palm was burning hot. 

Lucy opened her mouth and managed to whisper, "I...got s-sick." Her voice was hoarse and it seemed that just talking was painful to her. It caused Loke's chest to hurt. 

"Loke." 

The celestial spirit turned around at the sound of his name. He watched as Levy solemnly walked toward him, her hands clamped in front of her and her head drooping. She came to a stop in front of him and explained, "she was on a job with Cana. The dark mage they were fighting cast some sort of sickness spell on Lucy. Alzack and Bisca are getting Porlyusica." 

Anger swirled within Loke's gut, but it was easily overshadowed by the worry and fear that he felt. He whipped back around to grip Lucy's hot, pale, sweaty hand in his. Tears burned his eyes and his breathing became heavy as he whispered to her, "Lucy, you have to get through this. Please. I can't leave me. Not yet." His voice was trembling and quiet. He struggled to hold back his tears, not wanting to fall apart so easily. His girlfriend was clearly fighting for her life, and he had to be strong. 

Lucy continued to smile at him. It was a pained and tired smile. She opened her mouth to say something, but Loke shushed her, telling her, "you need to save up what strength you have left." 

He didn't know how long he remained like that, but all too quickly, Porlyusica showed up and ordered that Levy leave and Loke return to the Celestial Spirit World. The Zodiac spirit tried to argue, tried to appeal to the aging woman's heart and get her to allow him to stay beside his girlfriend, but she was adamant that he leave. Eventually, Loke had no choice but to obey, not wanting to delay Lucy's treatment. 

When reappeared in the Celestial Spirit World, he found himself alone. Loke stood there, staring at nothing in particular. His breathing was heavy and his hands were trembling at his sides. His mind was jumbled with thoughts, all reflecting his worry and fear toward Lucy and her condition. 

Was she going to be okay? Could she be healed? What were the possible long-time aftereffects of this? Was she going to die? 

Loke choked out a sob at that last thought. His hands clamped against his mouth as tears streamed down his face. His trembling legs gave way underneath him and he fell to his knees. He heaved a few shuddering breaths. 

What if Lucy died? How was he going to be able to go on if she died? 

He hadn't thought about it before, maybe because he never allowed himself to. He hadn't ever wondered what his life was going to be like without Lucy. But now, he was forced to think about it. And he hated having to think about it. 

"What are you doing, furball?" 

The unmistakable sound of Aquarius' voice broke him out of his distressing thoughts. He didn't bother looking at her, only wiped his eyes and sniffled a few times. He remained on his knees as he straightened his posture as much as he could. He took a deep breath and asked, "what do you want, Aquarius?" His voice wasn't as strong as he tried to make it. 

He could hear the mermaid spirit scoff as she answered, already irritated, "I can't have me time when you're making so much noise." 

Loke almost laughed at that. He hadn't realized that he was making any noise. He sighed and responded, "sorry about that." 

He heard Aquarius scoff and begin to float away. His fingers twitched at his sides and he fought the urge to stop her. He didn't know why, but he didn't want to be alone. He looked over at Aquarius' retreating figure and called out, "w-wait!" 

Aquarius stopped and turned around, the beginnings of a scowl on her face. "What?" 

Loke flinched at the venom in her voice. Suddenly feeling uncomfortable, like he was naked in front of every wizard guild in Fiore, he wrapped his arms around himself and looked down at the floor. "Nothing. Sorry." He muttered the words just loud enough for her to hear, 

He heard Aquarius sigh loudly and, to his great surprise, she floated over and sat right next to him. She glared down at him and questioned, "what's wrong with you?" 

Loke would have chuckled and teased her with a smirk if Lucy wasn't facing death right now. He sighed and locked his eyes on a tiny crack in the floor in front of him. "Lucy was attacked with a sickness spell. She might die." 

Aquarius was silent before she spoke, her voice strangely soft, "I understand how you feel." 

"Really?" Loke looked up at her, his eyes wide. Aquarius actually had a heart? Color him impressed. 

"Yes, really!" She yelled before her tone went back to strangely soft, "has Lucy told you about her mother?" 

"It's still a sensitive topic for her, but I did tell me that her mother was a celestial wizard and had a few of the Zodiac keys." 

Aquarius nodded. "Cancer, Capricorn, and I were Layla's spirits. She and I were particularly close. She got sick after a," she paused, as if she was trying to figure out words she should use, "certain event. Her magic was completely depleted and we knew that she was going to die." She pause again before she looked at Loke. Her blue eyes had softened noticeably and glistened with unshed tears. "I know how you feel, Leo. Losing a wizard who you love greatly isn't easy, and you might not ever get over it, but it's a part of being a celestial spirit. We live forever, but humans don't. That's a fact that you need to accept." 

Loke looked back down at the floor. Fresh tears welled up in his eyes and threatened to fall. Aquarius wasn't being very comforting, but he guessed that he should have expected that. Aquarius then continued, "however, that doesn't mean that you can't make the most of the time you have with the wizard whom you love." She rested a hand on his shoulder, finishing, "Leo, I promise you, Lucy will survive this. And, when she does, you should do everything you want to do with her. You should make as many memories as you can with her. Make sure that when her time does come, there aren't any regrets or what ifs." 

Loke sniffled. A warm feeling enveloped him as Aquarius' words sunk into his mind. She was right. He was still worried about Lucy, and he was still dreading the day that Lucy would die, but he also felt hopeful. He looked forward to the happy memories that he and Lucy would make together, once Lucy was recovered. He wiped his eyes free of tears and turned to Aquarius. "Thank you, Aquarius." 

The mermaid spirit smiled down at him and patted his shoulder. It was at that moment that Loke felt a tug on his magic. He was being beckoned to Lucy's side. He mumbled a goodbye to his fellow Zodiac and allowed his gate to open and pull him from the Spirit World to the human world. 

When he appeared, he found Lucy sitting up in bed. She was still pale and tired-looking, but looked healthier than she did the last time he saw her. The blonde smiled at him with love and Loke threw himself at her, wrapping his arms around her and burying his nose into her hair of sunlight, inhaling the familiar scent that he missed greatly, that he wanted to memorize for the rest of his immortal life. 

When he pulled away, he cupped Lucy's face, tears welling up in his eyes. "I thought that you were going to die." His voice was in a whisper. 

Lucy wrapped her arms around his neck and smiled sweetly at him. Tears pricked the corners of her eyes as she whispered back, "I will live for a million years." 

The couple then shared a searing, love-filled kiss as tears raced down their faces. 

#fairy tail #lucy heartfilia #loke #leo #leo x lucy #loke x lucy #lolu #levy mcgarden #aquarius #mentions of other characters #angst #fluff #near death #sickness #talk of death #established relationship

[mist-mistletoe]

Why do humans even gather in places like this, there's so many people here. No personal space and all we want to do is rip the closest persons throat out.

Maybe if we show then the blood of the ones who stepped to close they'll back off. They'll give the space around me we need and not crowd. We want to drag the disembodied part of the fucks who shoves to close behind me to just prove we deserve the space. We want to repaint the floors with gore and innereds and flesh and chunks of muscle and sinew, all just to show we can.

We hate crowds, it makes me jumpy and angry and terrified and we feel so small and useless. We aren't small, we aren't week. We need space. We need it so we don't maim the next person who steps close to me.

We want to taste the fear when the hoards of people realize what we can do. What we want to do, should do.

#otherkin #wolfkin #nonhuman #tw blood #tw gore #talk of gore #talk of death #vent post #vent #talk of harm #rambling thing #Vex talks

[mckiwi]

Stephen Strange was a doctor, a good one at that– a great one. He and Death had never been on good terms. She took his family from him, so he took his patients’ lives back from Her. He always stood outside of Death’s door, guarding it, keeping it locked away from others as best as he could. But Death comes for everyone, in the end.

He should be dead. By all means, that wreck was supposed to have killed him. As he hung there suspended by nothing but seat belts, with blood rushing to his head and the cold-water biting into his skin, he knew he would close his eyes and never open them again. And yet, he did. If it wasn’t the wreck that killed him, then surely it would be the sight of his mangled hands. Why is he here? Surely Death would’ve taken him when She had the chance. Years he’d spent, cheating Death out of lives She had worked hard for. Well, he wouldn’t be able to cheat Her anymore, not with this new life, anyway. Maybe he had died, after all. Isn’t having nothing to live for just as good as being dead?

Stephen Strange was a sorcerer– definitely not the best, or even close to it, but he was decent. He’d found peace at Kamar-Taj. He found peace in the ancient books he couldn’t yet read and the sound of rain in the courtyard. He could heal his hands here, start his life anew and save people again. Then came Kaecilius and Dormammu.

It was hard to remember his oath to do no harm while staring at a dead man. A man that was dead because of him, no less. Stephen offered up this man to the claws of Death so that his own might be spared another day. Soon followed The Ancient One, accepting Death’s invitation after centuries of denying it. Sometimes he’d wonder why she looked almost relieved.

Stephen Strange was the wielder of the Time Stone. He locked himself in a loop to save the Earth, and all the lives he’d reversed in the process. Life and Death had a certain balance, and he was sure to keep to it. That old man on the street making stir fry? Stephen took a spear through the gut. The woman watching funny cat videos on her phone? Stephen was blasted into atoms. His life, over and over, in exchange for theirs.

During one loop, as Stephen was choking on his own blood, taking his final breaths, he thought he heard Death speaking to him. You don’t have to do this, you know? I could end this. You could end this.

Stephen Strange was a human man– and a human man shouldn’t have been able to experience fourteen million different lives and still be able to function. With each life came a death, then the cycle repeated. Despite what your kind thinks, I’m not cruel. Some see me as a bringer of peace. I could give you that. No, he wasn’t allowed to die. Not yet. The brain is an organ, too. It can kill you just as easily as any other if not properly cared for.

Fourteen million times now he’d robbed Death of his soul. He stood at the door and waited. Taunting, never coming inside, never even indicating that he’d wanted to. Occasionally he’d end up giving Death a few sacrifices, such as the likes of Tony Stark or Natasha Romanoff. Giving up such sacrifices took a toll on Stephen, much more so than he probably even realized himself.

Stephen Strange was a Master of the Mystic Arts, a good one at that– a great one. He and Death had grown closer over the years. She’d cut things short when the pain became too much to bear in the loop with Dormammu. She’d save him the agony of having Thanos shred his soul with the Soul Stone. He often dreamt of Her, and all the ways he’d finally get to be taken into Her arms forever. He’d spent years ripping people away from Her embrace. Now he understood why they’d be so upset once they came back.

In the process of trying to save America Chavez, he’d have to visit an old friend. To dreamwalk into his dead variant’s body, he’d first have to do something. He knocked on Death’s door. She answered with a smile and held out Her hand. He took it.

#mckiwiwrites #doctor strange #personification of death #several other characters are mentioned #talk of death #implied/references suicide #kind of? #car accidents #time loop #dreamwalking #near death experience #dr strange #stephen strange #doctor strange fanfic #dr strange fanfic #stephen strange fanfic #marvel fanfic #marvel #fanfic

[susiequaz12]

Whumptober 22

Pick Your Poison- Withdrawal

Day 22! This is another excerpt from the Vampire AU with my immortal whumpee, Marlowe. Their masterlist is here. CW: nonbinary whumpee, immortal whumpee, vampire whumpers, vampire caretaker, prisoner whump, vampire feedings, noncon touching, withdrawal, choking. 

- - -

They had taken more vampires into the camp. It was needed, they had nowhere else to go, and they were one of the only places with any actual food source left. 

Of course, that food source was going insane. 

Lo had been treated well so far. There were a good bit of vampires to feed, but they still got at least two days between feedings when it was spread amongst the midst of them. Now there were nearly double the amount- and Lo had barely time to rest, or eat, or sleep decently. It’s not like they needed to- but it would make their lives a little more bearable. 

“Not today- please. I can’t Sol, I’m too tired.” 

The vampire knelt in front of them where they were laying on their cot in his room.  

“Come Lo. You know what will happen to you if we refuse.” He offered his hand to the weak human, motioning to pull them upwards. 

Lo pulled away, curling into the wall at the edge of their cot. “No- I- I can’t- Sol please.” 

The vampire grabbed their arm. He pulled them away from the wall and forced them to look into his face- a tight grip on their shoulders keeping them from squirming away. 

“Listen. I know you can’t, but we don’t have a choice. If you refuse, they will take you away from me. No more garden, no more bed, or clothes, or anything. You’ll be nothing more than just a breathing sack of blood. They won’t let me take care of you anymore. Does that sound like the better option?”

Lo quietly shook their head- a drop of tears sliding down their cheek.

“Okay, that’s what I thought. Do you want the venom today?” 

Lo thought for a moment before they nodded. They leaned towards the vampire and let him cradle their head- opening their mouth to receive the substance. 

Solomon covered their lips with his mouth, and Lo swallowed as the venom hit the back of their throat. He pulled away and wiped off his lips, watching as the venom began to take hold in their system. 

The venom always made things easier. When there were always at least three pairs of fangs on them for the feedings- it helped tune everything out during the worst times. They’d retreat into their mind as the world spun around them. As hands held tight against their skin- as fangs drained them of all blood and energy. Pain flared up and down their limbs- but they were tuned out to all of it as their mind spun. 

 - - -

They had gone two weeks without a break. Their blood replenished too fast for them to succumb from all the feedings, so they were stuck in a cycle of exhaustion and pain- half-conscious from the venom, and never fully present. 

Solomon came to his room one night to find the human shaking and sobbing where they were curled up on their cot. Their eyes shot up towards the vampire as he approached- gently closing the door behind him. 

“Lo-” he whispered out in a breath. He knelt in front of the human, placing a hand along the side of their face. Lo leaned into the touch. 

“I knew it’s gotten to be too much. There’s too many of us to keep doing this to you.” 

Lo choked out a sob at the kind words, falling into Solomon’s arms. 

“Please- I- I need-” 

“You need to rest. I’ll look at working up a new feeding schedule. Give you more of a break in between each feeding.” 

Lo’s frail hand locked around the vampire’s arm. 

“No I- I need it to- to go away- it all goes away-” 

Solomon shook their head, holding the human tight as they began to tremble violently. Their skin was cold- almost as cold as the vampire’s, and they were flushed with sweat and clammy. 

“It’s alright. You’re sick. Overworked. You just need to rest-” 

“No!” Lo cried- pulling away from the vampire’s chest where they had been cradled. “No please- just- just make it go away- I - I need it-” 

“Lo are you- do you want me to kill you?” Sol asked gently. It wouldn’t have been he first time they’d put the human out of their misery. But they hadn’t had to do that in a while. The human hadn’t died in a while either- no doubt their suffering had only grown without that relief.   

Lo shook their head- and then let their mouth fall open, leaning their head back- a whisper of ‘please’ on their lips. 

It took Sol a moment to realize what the human was asking of him. 

“No- Lo, no. I won’t. I can tell you’ve had too much- you’ve grown addicted.” 

Lo choked out a sob as the vampire refused. They began to cry- their body shaking more violently than it was before. 

“No I- I need it please- please Solomon- please-” their words grew desperate as they felt the lack of venom in their system. 

Everything was too much- the touch of his hands- the fabric against their skin- their own breath and pulse in their ears- they needed it to go away- they needed it all to go away. 

“Listen to me Lo.” Sol pushed the human away from their arms, holding up their head in his hands. The poor human’s eyes were bloodshot- pupils dilated and face slick with tears. “I’m not going to give you anymore venom. This isn’t good for you.” 

Lo whined at the refusal. “Please-” they muttered- their voice so small and frail. 

“No. No more venom Lo.” 

Lo fell forward against the vampire’s lap, holding onto the edge of his cloak. “Please-” they choked. “- I just need it to stop. I need it all to stop.” 

“I- I can make it stop for you. Just no more venom alright?” 

Lo paused in their shaking and begging to look up at the vampire. They nodded their head. 

This vampire- true they had captured them- but they had been their only advocate. They’d clothed them, given them food and water, and comfort when they needed it. Despite being a prisoner here- he made Lo feel like they mattered for more than just what their body could give. They’d trust whatever he had in mind. 

“Please- just make it stop.” 

Solomon adjusted the way he was sitting on the small cot, and leaned the human down so they were laying on his lap. Frail hands gripped his shirt as Lo tucked in to the touch. 

“Shh now- I’ve got you-” Sol murmured as the human cried. 

He locked a long, cold hand around Lo’s windpipe, squeezing hard enough to cut off the air, but not too hard to cause much pain or to break anything. 

At first Lo’s eyes grew wide. They thrashed slightly in the vampire’s grip, desperate for the oxygen they lacked. But it only took another moment for them to understand the vampire’s intentions. Lo closed their eyes- letting their mouth fall open and the breath escape from their body. 

Finally, the human stilled and Solomon pulled his hand away. He checked to make sure there was no heart beat, and then tucked the human up in blankets, letting their body rest and heal until they inevitably came back. 

He hoped that would be enough peace for a few moments, before they went back to the torture they were forced to endure. 

- - -

Taglist: @imagination1reality0 @whumpsday @thecyrulik @no-terms-and-conditions-apply @spectral-whumpy-writer

#whumptober2022 #no.22 #pick your poision #withdrawal #ocs #whump #whump writing #Marlowe the immortal #nonbinary whumpee #immortal whumpee #vampire whumpers #vampire caretaker #talk of death #choking #vampire feedings #vampire au

[ladyfly]

Two Ghosts And A Fleshy 2: Cry Me A River

Morning came far too quickly for your liking. You had opted to just sleep in. However, your sunny roommate though better of that as he tore the blinds open. A full 5 years of living together and the bastard still wouldn't let you sleep in. He used to tell you "Sunrise means open eyes!" You were not having it though.

You and Moon had convinced him waking up at eight was perfectly fine. You were not being a "lazy bones" as he called it. You just needed more sleep than most. A solid nine hours was good for you. You slowly sat up and shot Sun a playful glare.

He ignored your look "Today is a special day!"

You huffed "Special enough to let me sleep in?"

Sun stared at you for a moment before laughing loudly "Don't be silly! You are alive! You should be spending time enjoying that life! Not wasting it away sleeping."

You roll your eyes as you get dressed "I need sleep to properly enjoy what life I have."

Sun glared back at you "Get downstairs before I go get Moon to possess you and make you go."

You throw a sock at him. It goes through his body. He gives you a flat look before walking through your body. You shiver as a cold breeze passes through you. With a chuckle you make your way downstairs. The faint smell of coffee draws you to the kitchen.

Moon started the pot for you. They can't interact with the world enough to make you a full blown breakfast. But pushing a button on a coffee pot is simple enough that it doesn't drain them of too much energy. Every interaction with the living takes energy. Spend too much energy and they disappear for a while.

You asked them where they weren't but they said they weren't ready to tell you yet. They did tell you that when they leave they stay in the house. Apparently this house had a lot of secrete passages. You knew where some of them were. The rest Sun and Moon had no idea how to open.

Moon walks through you, they call it a ghost hug, "Happy anniversary Fleshy! Did you sleep well?"

You nod as you put bread in the toaster "I did! Happy Anniversary! What are we doing today? I know y'all had something planned."

Sun nods "Yeah! Something special! We want to show you after breakfast. So eat up Sunflower!"

You nod "I have something for you two as well. Just a second!" You take your phone out and open a picture flipping it to the boys "It's a life size human shaped body pillow!"

Sun squeals "Sunflower!"

Moon grins "Now we can cuddle better!"

You nod and set your phone down on the counter so they can keep looking. Sun and Moon can possess objects. Once in a while they possess a stuffed toy for you to hold at night. It's the only way they can feel you touching them. It's diluted a bit, but better than nothing. Only one of them does it at a time.

It takes a lot of energy for them to do it. Whichever one did it is gone the next day leaving you with the other. They call it a fair trade off. One spends the night with you and the other the day. It works for you because you like sleeping with something in your arms.

Breakfast finished it's time to see your surprise. Usually it's a new hidden passage. Something feels different about this. Though you can't put your finger on why. Maybe it's they way they are acting. Maybe it's the fact that today is special. Whatever it is you follow behind your spectral friends.

They lead you to the fireplace in the parlor. They stand Moon on the left and Sun on the right. They look nervous. Sun fidgets in place wringing his ghostly hands.

Moon gives a weak unsure smile "We... This is.... Our bod-..."

Sun takes a deep breath "We died in this house..." He bites his lip "Our... Oh gosh. Our bones... Our bones are behind the fire place."

Moon nods "We were. Now we don't remember this much. We were trapped behind there. We don't remember why. We tried to get out."

Sun puts a hand you can't feel on your shoulder "This room only opens from the outside. Our bones are in that room. If you don-"

"I want to bury them." You retort.

Sun looks shocked "What?"

You nod "Bury them. Outside. Somewhere nice on the property. You deserve it."

Moon frowns "What if it makes us go away?"

"Go away?" you ask.

Moon nods "Pass on to the other side. Move on. Go away."

You take a deep breath visibly upset "Then.... Then you go away. Not that I want you to leave! It just doesn't feel right leaving you behind the fireplace."

Sun passes through you "Oh sunflower. That's very sweet of you, but we don't want to go."

You shake your head "We'll meet again on the other side. It's ok. Besides, you'll get to see Great Aunt Agatha again."

Moon nods and points to a brick in the back of the fireplace "Push that in. It'll make a handle appear. Pull on it and twist to open the door."

You follow his instructions and a secrete door opens. On the other side of the door is a small 8ft by 8ft room. Two skeletons lay together in a corner. They are dressed like jesters. A few tears fall from your eyes as you walk over to them. You can tell who is who. One is dressed in blue and yellow.

And the other is dressed in red and yellow. It's gross. You know it is. You know if anyone saw you do this they would berate you. You reach your hands out and pet the top of their heads tenderly.

You wipe your eye with the back of your hand "I'm sorry this happened to you. I bet you were the life of the party. Do you know where you want to be buried?"

Sun nods "Yes. We spend a lot of time together in the kitchen. The oak tree in the window."

Moon nods and you set off to dig some holes. It takes you all day but by sunset your task is done. You even made two headstones out of wood. The bodies are neatly wrapped in white bed sheets and placed in the graves.

You stand overlooking them "I'm sorry something so terrible happened to you. I wish I had known you when you were alive. At least that way I could have hugged you. I wish you the best in the afterlife. I'm so happy I met you! Sunny, I promise to keep planting flowers. I'll plant sunflowers on your grave. I'll miss our games together. Moon, I'll be sure to watch your favorite movies at least once a year. I'll miss your pranks. The house will be quiet without the two of you in it. I'll try to keep it full of laughter!"

Sun sniffles "I am going to miss you so much! I'll be waiting at the gates of heaven or whatever for you. When I see you again I'm giving you the biggest hug ever!"

Moon smiles "I know you'll do great things. Get a cat and name it after me."

You nod and begin to fill the graves doing your best to fill them at the same time. When at last they are full Sun and Moon begin to fade away.

Moon looks at his fading form "Wait! No! I have more to say!"

Sun screams "WE LOVE YO-"

And they are gone. You drop to the ground and ugly cry loudly. You cry so much you fall asleep outside. When you wake up the next morning it feels wrong. Like a big piece of you is gone. Because it is. Your best friends are gone forever. You did hear what Sun was saying.

You don't know what to do with that piece of information. You suppose the only thing you can do is take things one day at a time. The house feels empty when you get inside. The warm feelings it once had are gone. You are truly alone in the house right now.

Waking up the next morning feels wrong. Your Sunny is not there to tear the curtains open. Moon is not scaring you in the bathroom. You don't have a warm conversation over coffee. You didn't even realize how attached you had become to the duo. Life would never be the same again.

Three weeks later the large person sized pillow you ordered arrived. You brought it inside but nothing more. You couldn't look at it yet. It was too painful. Late that night you found yourself having a hard time sleeping. Might as well open the box. At least you could pretend they are still around.

Inside the box was a pillow about six feet tall. One side looked like Moon and the other Sun. Seeing the pillow made you cry again. You clutched it to your chest in the front entryway.

Fat hot tears trailing down your cheeks "Why is it so hard! I said goodbye! Why did you have to go?" You clutch the pillow tighter "I love you! I love you!"

That night you fall asleep on the floor clutching the pillow to you. Tears still streaming as you drift off. The next morning you are forced awake by the curtain in the room being pulled open.

A warm and familiar voice tells you gently "Sunrise means open eyes. You are alive. You should be spending time enjoying that life! Not wasting it away sleeping Sunflower."

You start to cry again believing your mind is playing tricks on you "STOP IT! STOP IT! IT'S NOT FAIR!" You let out a loud wail into the empty house.

Two warm arms wrap around you. You don't fight them. Far too tired to do anything but cry. Your arms hang limply at your side. Something soft brushed your cheek and you crack an eye open. Feathers, no not just feathers. Wings. Two white pristine wings.

A large familiar yellow hand brushes against your cheek "It's ok. Let it all out. I have you."

You can't stop the tears so you continue to cry thoroughly confused. You are picked up off of the floor and carried to the kitchen. Inside is a jaw dropping sight. Moon is standing at the stove fixing food. Two white wing and a halo on his head. A new flood of tears.

A white wing from behind you wipes at your face "You are going to shrivel up at this rate."

"What the hell is happening?!" You wail out.

Sun turns you in his arms so he can look at you "We are your guardian angels. Here to protect you from the forces of evil."

You hiccup "I don't understand."

Moon turns around "We got into heaven and fought to be your guardian angels. The big man saw how miserable we were up there and let us down here to keep you safe."

"Safe from what?" You sniffle out.

Sun smiles warmly "We can talk about that some other time. Right now you need food and water."

You nod and take a deep breath to help calm you. Moon sets down a cup of coffee and an omelet onto the island. He takes your chin and tips your face toward him.

He smiles softly and leans down "Can I kiss you?"

You nod unable to do anything else. His eyes light up as he kisses you on the lips.

Moon hums as he pulls back "We can touch you now. I for one intend to touch you all over all the time."

Sun gasps "Moon! Don't make it sound so dirty!" He rolls his eyes giving you a chaste kiss "We want to touch everywhere we couldn't before and make you feel loved."

Moon chuckles "That was dirty Sun."

Sun sets you down "No it was not!"

Moon nods "Yes it was."

You sip your coffee as their argument continues. Things feel more right than they had before. Life will never be the same and you wouldn't change it for the world.

#sundrop x reader #moondrop x reader #Fluff #talk of death #talk of corpses

[bennyyrabbit]

Thinking about Veronica. Thinking about JD. Veronica's parents didn't care. JD's mom killed herself in front of JD. JD was predisposed to violence. Veronica was easily manipulated because she craved something more than what she had.

He knew what he was doing when he killed Heather, but Veronica had no clue.

Veronica let herself believe he wouldn't do the same with Kurt and Ram because she didn't want to face who the boy she was in love with really was.

Then it was too late.

He cared so little about her or the others.

But he played her, and it was easy, because 17 year old girls are easy to manipulate.

Her parents paid so little attention to her.

Their love was so bland, so routine, it felt like a show. Like a half-assed act.

But JD seemed to love her in his own sick way, so she let him.

And her classmates paid for it.

Could it have been different if JD's mom was still alive?

Could it have been different if Veronica's parents worried more about their daughter?

Could it have been different?

Or would JD still be the same? Would Veronica still be as easily manipulated and used?

Will she ever stop blaming herself for what became of JD?

Or will she forever feel guilt that isn't hers?

Will she continue to be plagued with dreams of Heather and Ram and Kurt's ghosts? Dreams of JD?

If JD's mother was still alive, would he have done any of it at all?

Is that what decided his fate, as a boy who felt so unloved? So angry at the world?

Was his mother's death, her willing death, her willing abandonment of him, was that what sealed his fate?

Or was it the second he was born? Destined to be this monster?

Just thinking about Veronica and JD.

#heathers #jason dean #veronica sawyer #heathers the movie #talk of death #talk of suicide #talk of murder #if you can't tell I care a lot about these two #I just want to know if JD could've been saved #If Veronica could've been saved #If Heather and Ram and Kurt could've been saved #their teenage angst had a body count of 5

[honeycollectswhump]

I saw what you posted about death and my bird is dying right now, it's really hard. We can cry together :(

my thoughts are with you and your bird <3 if you want to, you could tell me about your beloved little bird, that way we can both remember them!

i will be very sad but i’m also thankful for the eleven years i could share with her!! she is my beloved and i treasure our last moments even though she probably won’t live past this night

tw image of dying pet (she just looks like a very tired bird)

#tw death #talk of death #pet death

[daysnknights]

Practically begging any higher power that might exist for them to stop people making fucked up gorey yandere Wally fanfiction please I can’t keep looking up fluff and keep being subjected to psychological manipulation and death please

#wally darling #welcome home #death #gore #talk of death #knight speaks

[writey-unicorn]

(Possibly unnecessary) Spoiler warning for most of the first season of Arrow.

So I'm rewatching Arrow after only semi-watching it the first time and I realized something.

Oliver is a sympathetic anti-hero who kills too many people and is far too self-destructive and angsty to be a hero but does too much good to be a villain.

Everyone else is a villain. Let me explain.

So Oliver has spent the last 5 years going through hell on an island with the singular goal of getting off the island and fulfilling his father's last wish of curing his city. He starts exacting his plan and gets caught by Diggle who, after a bit of back and forth and a premature breakup, joins Oliver in his quest. After Diggle joins him his quest changes to deal with some of the symptoms as well as the problem and he focuses even more on the symptoms when Felicity joins. This is all while trying to protect his friends and family and maintaining his public image which is for everyone except the people who know who he is which is (I think) at four and of course dealing with his own issues on the side.

And no one in the show gives Oliver the time or the patience he needs to deal with any of this.

His mother and sister are happy to see him for exactly 30 seconds and then are like, "Why aren't you exactly the way you used to be? Why are you always gone? Why aren't you perfect?" As far as they knew, he had been the sole survivor of an accident and alone for 5 years. He would need more than 30 seconds to get used to society again. Sure, he didn't help them realize this, but you could use your brain and realize that he's going to need more than 30 seconds to get used to people caring about him again.

Laural is also bad but has far more reason to be. That doesn't really excuse her or her unrealistic expectations for him but at least she waited for Oliver to come to her before telling him how disappointed she was in him.

Then you have the people who know.

Felicity probably comes off the lightest mostly from not knowing him very much. She mostly just adds on to other people's disappointment in Oliver. Tommy also isn't that bad but he knows that Oliver has been missing for 5 years, came back completely changed, and is a vigilante. He knows something horrific happened to him and is nowhere near as patient with Oliver as Oliver needs even after Oliver saved his life twice and his father's life once. And yes, Oliver had a hand in the friendship breakup but the man has a laundry list of issues, and, canonically, I doubt he's been home for more than 8 months yet. If he's been gone for 5 years then he deserves at least a year to recover before everyone starts yelling at him for not being good enough.

And then you have Diggle.

Oliver's and Diggle's relationship has always been rocky from the beginning. They've been in the same chapter, but never quite the same page. and yet, Oliver, Oliver "bullheaded, can't apologize to save his life" Queen, more often than not, is the one who changes what he's doing and how he's doing it for Diggle. Also, of the two, Oliver has apologized and reached out to make things right more. For one of the recent episodes, Oliver helped Diggle track down this guy he wanted to kill which Argus was already helping with. Oliver, probably expecting the highly trained Argus agents to not pick the least-defensible meeting spot possible (which they did and yes I'm angry about it) and to be able to deal with one person on their own, had gone after a man who was going to kill a child instead of helping there and Diggle threw a fit for that. And instead of Diggle realizing that he had overreacted and that Oliver had made the choice that he thought was right at the time Oliver apologized and promised to do better. Yeah, I'm mad about that too.

No one in the show holds anyone but Oliver responsible for any relationship he's in. No wonder Oliver ran into the arms of the first person who saw him for everything he was and didn't immediately berate him for not being exactly what she wanted and yes I'm talking about crazy ex-girlfriend, Helena.

#green arrow #john diggle #thea queen #felicity smoak #tommy merlyn #laurel lance #oliver queen #arrow spoilers #talk of death #talk of murder #bad coping mechanisms #because this is oliver trying to cope with everything #very badly #and no one's helping him #or can stop thinking about themselves long enough to notice how bad off he is #the man needs help #helena bertinelli #tw self destructive behavior #i feel so bad for poor oliver