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warmau · 3 years

Text

not knowing what to say isn't a foreign feeling to you, yet when you come face to face with ten outside his apartment on this summer morning, you are almost too petrified to even string a sentence together

he's really just........leaving

ten shines a big smile and from the open door you hear kun's exasperated voice asking why in the world ten is packing up his entire existence for a program that's going to last two months

"you look nervous"

ten jokes first, running a hand through his dark hair which he's spent the colder months growing out

"im the one going to a different country and yet you look like you might turn green"

his laughter tickles you and you force yourself out of the weird, frozen feeling, for his sake

"im not nervous - it's just this is our first summer apart since what, highschool?"

ten leans against the frame of his door and lets kun scuttle past him with a scowl

yangyang and hendery bounce after him with ten's insane amount of luggage

"yeah but it's two months, not two decades. plus....you know how much ive always wanted to do this."

right. and here you are being selfish.

"of course, i mean it's literally the birthplace of ballet."

"technically that's italy, but france is a close second."

"i hate you"

ten pulls you into his arms before you register that this is your goodbye hug

"i'll miss you too."

kun drives everyone to the airport, he complains and cries the most.

sicheng gives you a knowing look when ten takes your wrist in his hand and tucks your arm between his.

you ignore the look, and focus on ten. on him. and then - when the switchboard pops up his flight info - he gives a bubbly and excited

"ive gotta go!"

and then summer starts, just as he's gone

"so when are you going to tell him you're in love with him."

sicheng brings the big gulp he stole from hendery up to his lips and you keep your eyes closed behind your sunglasses

"sorry, yukhei's not my type."

"you know im not talking about yukhei."

you dig your fingers into the sand beside your towel, the beach is already so noisy so you pretend you don't hear sicheng, but you still feel him looking.

you guess a part of it is true, you love ten. who doesn't?

is that the core of the issue then, that ten is so available and loveable and charming, that it makes him also unattainable?

or at least, unattainable to you.

you hear your phone buzz inside your bag and sicheng is being dragged into the water by the rowdy rest of your friend group

it could be a text from ten?

your mind excites, but you put out that fire

it's probably just spam.

ten does text and even video call the first two or so weeks while he's away

you get blurry photos of food at cafes and the eiffel tower, random fancy looking dogs being walked on the small, cramped streets

ten's connection is kind of bad - but he still gleams through the fuzzy facetime camera as he shows you around the room the dance academy has provided

pangs of his happiness and excitement seep into you

and then there's the first sign of worry comes knocking and twirling through his door

a group of other dancers, all beautiful and strong, asking ten - from the limited amount of french you catch - if he's done, they're waiting for him to go to a show with them

ten gives you a scattered, quick goodbye. he says he'll video call again.

all you get is an update text almost five days later that has no pictures attached just a;

im ok - by the way i totally miss eating hot chips with you at midnight. ive had like a banana smoothie and that's it.

sicheng and kun are the first to pick up on the shift, you are quietly withdrawing to yourself

nothing makes you laugh

ten doesn't reply to your question about what the paris metro looks like, actually he doesn't even read it

kun nearly tugs hendery's ear red when he shares a snap story of ten pressed cheek to cheek with his new dancer friends in front of the louvre when you're in the same room

the thing is you are not jealous of any of them.

you don't go around trying to find their facebooks, clicking on their instagram profiles, comparing you and them.

you are just sad to your bones that they will understand ten in such a way that no matter how long you two have been friends

you will never, truly know

"you're his best friend"

sicheng reasons on the phone as you stare up at the wall above your desk, littered in old pictures and clippings and your gaze catches on the ticket stub from ten's first-ever solo dance performance

it had been a talent show in highschool.

it had been the first time you saw ten perform outside the corner of his cramped bedroom or the glimpse you caught meeting up with him outside the dance academy

he's in paris, he's with people who love it so much more than i do - they love dancing like he loves dancing.

i cannot understand that.

"i think you were right sicheng."

"im always right."

i do love him. when am i going to tell him?

you hang up after sicheng has his i told you so moment and stare at your screen

a notification flashes across the screen and it's a text from ten

the trains here are blue. i miss you.

you want to reply right away, so you open the message and start typing

i miss you too. actually, i think i finally understand why people who are in love are so hurt when they're suddenly left without their other half and ten you are my o-

you delete the sentence and make a face

nice. i miss you too.

you don't send it - or at least you forget to because your fingers are shaking and you exit out of the messaging app before checking

abandoning your phone, you turn on your side and stretch your hand out to reach the edge of the bed

there's enough space between you and it for someone to fit, so you remember the countless times ten has laid there

smiling and laughing and tickling your face with his sleeping breath

you can't even recall a conversation because there have been hundreds

suddenly you feel a warmth creep up your skin

hundreds of opportunities to tell him - and each time i chose to be a coward.

"you should write him a letter."

"this isn't a movie, what - you think im going to write a letter and he'll jump on the first plane from france to come to my side?"

sicheng cocks an eyebrow as if to say it is a possibility

"no. im not writing a letter. i'll suck it up and confess when he comes back."

you somehow end up writing a letter.

maybe because you really do want to just send a long text spilling your mushy, soft, pink feelings

but you know that's just not what ten deserves

he deserves (and you do too, but you won't admit this) a face to face confession

so you start retelling the moments that flutter up in your heart whenever you think about him

how he makes the room brighter when he's in it, how he dances with every bone, joint, muscle in his body - how he approaches it with no inhibition and true devotion that paints its way across his face when he practices, how he fits perfectly into the hole that grows more massive every day you don't see him

standing there across the hall - coffee in hand, gym bag with his scuffed dance shoes

by the time you're finished - the letter is longer than you imagine. there are parts crossed and scribbled out, repetitive thoughts, and stupid little comments and metaphors that compare ten to flowers or clouds or anything else pretty in nature

you cringe at yourself, but you do feel better

it could be your outline for when the time to actually tell him comes.

you shove the papers into an envelope, write ten's name and the address of his parisian dance academy just for the irony

and then make the mistake of letting it sit on your desk

in a matter of days, it has been swallowed by a bunch of other papers and trinkets

and when you're rushing around your room trying to get ready for another adventure to the beach - sicheng clinks the lollipop against his teeth and fishes it out - curious at the stamp

"do you want me to mail this?"

he asks and you're trying to find those sunglasses you literally just bought and grumble that sure, whatever - you'll meet him out by kun's car.

halfway to the beach, you turn in horror from the passenger seat to look at sicheng in the back

your eyes like saucers and a tremor in a voice

"wait. what did you ask me back in my room?"

sicheng's big smile is red from the candy, "your letter to ten."

and there comes the second pang of dread and worry that takes the overwhelming shape of your summer

oh my god - oh my god - maybe the letter won't even make it. i mean it's a letter to france....it'll take at least a month to get there. wait - it probably didn't even have a stamp on it. oh god maybe the address was totally off and some poor stranger is about to be subjected to my very incoherent feelings.....

every day you look at your phone and there's no texts or emails or anything from ten

his social media has gone quiet too

you throw your dignity down a well and ask all your friends if they've heard from him and they all scratch their heads and say no, it's been maybe a week since they did

your stress then turns from your love letter to a possibility that ten is in trouble

he kind of thrives from attention so it is very weird that he's so off-grid

you decide finally, on the day that it's been exactly a month and one day since he was gone, to call

you hover over the facetime button - should i text him first?

with a yelp, you nearly drop and crack your screen when ten's name flashes across the screen

you settle your breathing and tell yourself he hasn't gotten the letter, there's no way - since when has snail mail been efficient?

you answer and are about to ask what's up when ten waves something into the camera

"i got your letter."

maybe you go into rigor. because ten's eyebrows knit and he asks if your connection is ok, you aren't saying anything

you don't know if it's just because you miss him so much that you're able to drag yourself back into consciousness or because you are curious, in the depths of your mind, what his reaction will be

"o-oh. right- i-"

ten frowns and you think it's coming. the rejection is coming.

"is that why you didn't answer my text? you sent the letter instead?"

"your text?"

"yeah, i said i missed you and you read it and never responded."

a peek of a smile stretches on his pretty, bare face

"i never thought you were so romantic to send a letter."

something burns on your skin but you just try to make sure your hand holding the phone doesn't shake

"im not - i just, it was dumb sicheng said i should write it because - i don't know. he's the romantic, blame him."

"you're the one that said i could make a shy tulip open its petals with my laughter."

"oh god"

that smile turns into a grin

"and that my dancing manages to cast a spell on you."

you hide your expression by turning your face

"are you going to re-read the whole thing to me?"

"should i, you're so poetic."

"don't make fun of me."

your voice is serious this time, small and huddled, because you mean it

worse than being told he doesn't feel the same is to be ridiculed for holding him in your heart like this for so long

"im not making fun of you, the letter is beautiful."

you still can't look at him, it's so ten to be kind before he's cruel

"i could never write something like that - so i thought i would just call you and say it."

you don't need to love song yourself into telling me you just see me as a friend

"i love you."

your head whips back so fast your phone drops and you curse and ten can't help but laugh

"sorry, sorry -what did you say?"

he runs a hand through his dark hair, the lighting in his room is dim and illuminates him perfectly

a large white t-shirt engulfs his slender shoulders as he sits up against the wall

"i love you. i know it's corny to confess over facetime, but im guessing it's more forgivable than text?"

a bubble bursts in your stomach and it makes you feel lightheaded and inhumanely blissful all at once

"i love you too."

"more then friends right, because your letter had this part about kissing im very interested in."

you bite back your lip and nod, both embarrassed that he'd bring that part up too but also seeing ten - your close friend, your secret love - talk about kissing you

makes some of the neurons in your body go haywire

"good, i seriously was scared you might have been pranking me with thi-"

"i would never. im not hendery."

"oh how are they, ive been super busy with the practice for a review so i haven't talked to anyone."

another thing you love about him, he keeps everyone in. he leaves none of his friends behind. he pretends like he couldn't have a care in the world, but he cares more than anyone else.

"he's ok, he almost crashed kun's car yesterday."

ten shrugs, "expected."

and like that - everything is still somehow the same. there is no awkward phase after you've talked about your feelings for each other at all.

because your love doesn't come as a one hit punch because ten is beautiful, although he is to an unfair degree

it comes from the experience of being around him. having so much of him. maybe even getting a little addicted.

you do talk more on the phone, no more long pauses even though ten's practices get more grueling and you tell him to take his time to rest

but he's sweaty on the practice room floor - texting you - telling you everything is sore but the thought of seeing you soon makes it all better

it's three days before ten is scheduled to fly back that he has his review and you are biting your fingernails waiting for him to tell you about it

when you get a youtube link at like three in the morning - you click it and someone has recorded ten's performance

somehow, he looks more graceful than you've ever seen him

a new text comes in when it's almost done

'i think i did well - can i get a reward?'

'you'll get a really good one when you're home'

he sends a winking emoji and you can't fall asleep after because you wonder what he's expecting, you'd meant a kiss - had he meant more?

you wouldn't mind that at all.

xiaojun is being pulled away from the conveyer belt by kun and hendery is asking sicheng for a sip of his starbucks as you all wait for ten's plane to land in the airport lobby

you two have not told anyone - mostly because you know there will be endless questions you won't have answers too and sicheng might literally never let you live it down

so you wait for ten to be here so you can suffer together

you see the gates from his flight open and sicheng mutters that you look like you're going to pop like a goddamn balloon

for once in your life, you don't snide back at him, folding your hands in front of you and tippy-toeing to see over the crowd

and then, like seeing him for the first time all the years ago when you first met, ten comes out

hendery and xiaojun try to go for a running jump, but the older members hold them back because everyone can sense whats coming

you dash toward him and ten doesn't stay still either - you two collide so hard it almost hurts, but you don't care at all

ten's duffel bag falls over his shoulder and your hands are wrapped around his neck before he can even say your name

it's a first kiss that couldn't be more characteristically fit for you

sweet, big smiles tasted on lips, and interrupted by none other than your group of friends gasping in a symphony of shock

except for sicheng - he knew

ten tastes like you imagine he would taste, maybe because in smaller ways you've already had doses of the sunshine that radiates off him before

he keeps his hands wrapped around your waist as he looks down into your eyes

"mon amour"

"is that really all you learned in france?"

"ummm yeah, i don't know how to say let's get out of here and back to my place even though im pretty sure someone said that to me at some point."

you pout, "don't try to make me jealous."

"never!"

ten chuckles as you press your face into his neck and hug him close

the only way you get pulled apart is because someone (kun) reminds you all you're still at the PUBLIC airport

the drive back is a frenzy and everyone wants to know everything and not about just you two - because you're "two" now - but about france and traveling and ten's dancing

like you'd sensed - nothing has really changed

just this time, your fingers are locked in tens. and the warmth you longed for in silence is suddenly all out in the open.

funnily enough, you and ten don't ever write letters to each other again.

ten just doesn't like writing - it takes too much sitting down

and you are horrified everytime he fishes your love confession out of the memory box and dangles it above your head as leverage

it's how he convinced you into adopting the first cat. now you two have three.

so when you and him are deciding the best way to let all your friends know about your upcoming event you cross out mailed invitations

"we can make an email list."

your legs are thrown over his thighs on the sofa and he's resting the laptop on you them

"let's just make an instagram post: wedding in our backyard on thursday - you're invited."

ten pinches his nose

"we are not having a backyard wedding. we could not fit everyone in my dance company into it anyway."

you play with your engagement band and sigh

"fine, fine. what about.....we just call everyone and tell them. if we call kun right now he'll let all of the world know by the end of the week."

ten agrees with a hum, but then starts typing and you lean over to see

"bulk wedding invites? you're giving in?"

he closes the laptop and tosses it to the side, easily and gently pushing you down onto your back to hover over you with a small content sound

"i am. but we don't even have to write the letters - some company will do it for us."

his lips are inches from yours and all of a sudden you're young again - waiting to kiss him for the first time at that airport

"you know we'll still have to write vows right."

he is about to kiss you, he's so close and your eyes are closing

"i'll just read your letter outl-"

"TEN NO!"

he laughs, laughs until he finally does kiss you and then laughs again when he pulls back - the overflowing amount of love that exists in that moment is potent

you tell him to get over that old thing, but he shakes his head

"never, when again in all the lives i live is someone going to say i could make a shy tulip open its petals with my laughter?"

#i know his bday was in february please im still working through them cries #ten au #ten imagines #ten scenarios #nct au #nct imagines #nct scenarios #wayv imagines #wayv au #wayv scenarios #sfw #nostolgic!au #ten #member: ten #im sicheng through all this

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ikilledamoth · 3 years

Text

'How I thought my boyfriend was dead for three years straight.'

Hi.

So this post might be incoherent, a mess and also also might not be of interest to anyone but I want to write it down and let it out.

I am not a good writer so the timeline might be a mess especially since its been years after some events and my memory tends to fail me.

I'll try to document as much information as I can here but there might be gaps. The post might also be quite long.

Before I start, trigger warnings for:

depression, suicide mention, drug and alcohol abuse mention, abusive family mention.

1: Introduction to Past.

I used to be here on a different account however, I've lost access to it. (old email, no longer remember it, it's been years after all and I never thought I'll use this app again.)

My boyfriend's name on here was @slightly-depressed-niko-boy. Do excuse the content there as it's rather depressive, having been written in a quite bad period of time for him.

Niko is neurodivergent and at the time of using this app (2017) pretty mentally ill, and been in a rather abusive household for his whole life. His parents are physically and mentally abusive. They have always been extremely manipulative and controlled his life to the point where... Well... He had basically no autonomy. They were in control of his social media at many points, controlled his devices, forced him to stay at home at most times and cherrypicked who he was and was not allowed to speak to and hang out with. Whilst doing all that, they still managed to trick most people into thinking that they were a rather picture perfect family. Pretty nasty people.

As you may notice, I'm writing in a present tense.

2: Last Events.

In 2017, I was lead to believe that Niko died.

It was all almost too masterfully planned, really. I had no reason to believe that it was fake. I was at the scene when things happened, as well and had no reason to deny the claims made by Niko's family, combined with what I saw.

To anyone that I lead astray and made believe that Niko was gone: I am truly, truly and genuinely sorry.

I would never try to lie to anyone about something like this. I knew how much he meant to his friends and I would never try to hurt them by confirming he was gone. I believed that it was true and I was devastated at the time myself. I felt my whole world falling apart, I did. I had no reason to think that it might not be true.

I have never had any malicious intentions.

Niko had to go inpatient due to what I was informed was an OD. And what I was told was a su¡c¡d€ attempt. Later, I was informed by his parents it was a successful one.

At the time, I felt devastated. I was not thinking clearly, being too hurt to be rational. I did not notice all the red flags and the sketchy manner in which Niko's parents behaved. I did not realise that they might have had ulterior motives. I was dealing with grief, having lost a friend of many years and someone that I truly loved.

Given that it all happened about four years ago, I do not remember much details. I tried recalling things but due to the traumatic nature of those events, I was left grasping at the little bits that I can still remember. I can't remember many details, or who I spoke to at the time. In fact, couple of years ago I managed to forget about all of that, somewhat. To a degree.

I could never forget my boyfriend and years I've spent with him, of course, but with all happening in life, I managed to move on enough that details of those traumatic days turned into a blur.

However, that changed in September 2020. Three years after the events.

3: Introduction to Present.

At that point, I have moved out of my old house and no longer associated myself with the area where Niko and I used to live.

As I would like to keep some privacy, I'm not going to mention details of locations and institutions where I went, etc, however I will mention that I went to a university in a completely new town.

I did not know many people here, besides those that I met online during freshers events and whatnot. It was a fresh start, in a way.

In many ways, I am no longer the same person I was in 2017, and I'd like to ask people that knew me back then to try not to fully associate me with whoever I was back then. I'd like to also apologise if I've ever done anything that could have been of harm to anyone for I was just a kid, thinking that the world's a bit of a playground. I'd like to ask people to give me a chance to introduce myself properly as me, and not that person from the past, who functioned as nothing else but a romantic partner of someone online.

But I digress.

4: First Encounter.

Weeks past, and I began to meet new people, explore new areas, visit new places. One of friends from my course added me to a groupchat where we could get to know each other all a bit better. The group consisted of way too many people, so I wasn't the most active there, however it was a bit of a mix of different people. Not limited to my course, or even, as I'd soon find out uni.

And that's when I saw a familiar name that caught my attention.

You know, there are plenty of people sharing names and surnames. The world is so big after all. I didn't think much of it at first, because well... After all, Niko I knew was long gone.

Not.

Curiosity spiked, I started talking, wanting to double check if that person I saw in the groupchat was really a stranger.

I did a bit of digging and given it's almost five in the morning as I'm writing it, I'm not going to go into much detail, just yet. (might edit this post later, I just want to post it as soon as I can)

It's not that difficult in the digital age, really. Everything is kind of... Out here for you to take in.

That's when I found out, my boyfriend never died.

5: The Lies.

I know all of this sounds crazy, but I need you to listen. In a span of few weeks, I realised that past years of my life were a lie. That my grief was unnecessary. That my pain was created because someone tried to intimidate and scare me and anyone that Niko was ever close to.

At first, I felt cheated. I felt like my best friend faked his own death, but he did not. He did not, and I need people to know that he did nothing wrong, and in fact, after all these years needs more help than ever.

I want to reach out to people that were friends with him, ever spoke to him briefly. And also reach out to those who knew nothing about him and tell you : Niko is alive, but he is not safe and sound. And I am all alone in this mess, and I need some help. I need support from people that knew him. I need support from people that might care. Because I can't do it alone.

That's what the current situation looks like:

Niko's parents forcibly put him inpatient for longer than necessary to make his friends believe he was dead. They took his electronics and made him lose access to his old accounts by getting rid of his old phone number. They cut him off from the outside world. They threatened to hurt him and used intimidation tactics to make him cooperate and turn him into a doll in all of this.

I was told they put down his cat as a punishment for unknown reasons and after months of his hospitalisation, moved towns for again, unknown reasons. Niko was then homeschooled due to his, apparently, unwell mental state. He had no access to the outside world. No more social media, school friends, nothing. He was cut off in the world that made everyone else think he was dead. And they succeeded. Even I firmly believed that Niko was gone. And I feel deeply ashamed to admit it. I feel like I failed him and many of his friends by not investigating further, however I was still a kid at the time and there wasn't much I could do. I didn't think the situation was as messed up as it was.

After years of being under almost a complete supervision and a suicide watch even, Niko continues to be controlled by his parents, despite being an adult that deserves autonomy. I can explain the situation further in messages.

Even though I managed to speak to him again, after all these years of thinking he was gone, every time he seemed like there was someone listening, watching over his shoulder.

6: The Present.

I am currently formulating a plan to free Niko from the abuse that he is experiencing with his family. I need to get money to do so, therefore it's nothing I can do instantly, however I've been reaching out to various foundations to see what can be done. My current plan is to find a way to transport Niko out of his house into a temporary accommodation where he can stay away from his parents, ideally with someone who can help him stay safe. I need money for that, though, as accommodations, even emergency ones can be quite pricy if you're not on benefits.

As its very late right now, I'm ending this post right here. However I will edit and update it when I can and I just want to let it out into the world. Sorry for keeping it so long. If you read so far-thank you.

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black-streak · 5 years

Text

Saturday Night's Alright for Fighting (but Sundays are meant for rest) - The Beginning

Part 1

So I came up with this partially fleshed out idea on discord and decided to try writing a prequel of sorts to my HCs? Anyways, Mari is like 20ish and Tim is around 25 here. Pre-relationship.

~---~

Marinette would forever be grateful that she had memorized the layout of the manor back in her first few visits. Otherwise she would have been absolutely lost by now; her sleep addled mind unwilling to give a single thought as to where she was walking. The only thought she could process was a cry for coffee whispering like a mantra through the back of her mind.

Turning a seemingly random corner, she found herself in the side kitchen standing in front of the coffee maker, already holding a fresh pot of the heavenly smelling life elixir. Okay, that's a bit dramatic, but whatever, it's 3 am and she's entitled to her theatrics.

Pouring a cup into her favorite mug, having had it appear before her despite not recalling retrieving it, she held it close and made way to the sit-in table, slumping down into the closest seat.

It took about 10 minutes and half her mug down to realise she wasn't alone in the room. Turning her head slightly, she spotted Tim typing away at his laptop, his own mug just to the right of her arm.

'When the hell did he get there?' She couldn't remember hearing any footsteps or the coffee pot pouring but then… she also didn't remember turning it on…. 'He's been here the whole time, hasn't he?'

Turning back towards her own, she finished off the cup and got up to retrieve the pot, moving over to fill both of their mugs before returning it to its holder only to drop back into her seat beside him, leaning closer to see what he was working on.

"Thanks."

Jumping slightly, she just blinked at him for a moment, then gave a slight nod.

"Couldn't sleep?" Tim glanced at her, inquiry quiet and half incoherent in its murmur.

Humming softly she considered before truthfully admitting, "Rarely can."

"Damian asleep then?"

"Probably."

"You're not sure?"

"Didn't want to check his room and bother him if he was. Plus, he'd be cranky if I woke him for no reason."

That seemed to catch Tim's attention for whatever reason, because he turned his eyes off the document to look at her fully now.

"You don't sleep in his room?"

"Nah. I tend to cuddle in my sleep and he can't stand being confined like that. Puts him on edge, I think."

That only prompted an even more perplexed look from him. Unable to process that with so little sleep, she turned back to looking over his shoulder, trying to read what Tim was working on. Giving up, she looked back up to him.

"Whatcha working on?"

"Eh, just some last minute paperwork for a new deal WE is suppose to be negotiating next week."

"... At 3am?"

"You judging me," he asked, lifting one eyebrow slightly in amusement at the hypocrisy.

"You said the deal is for next week."

"It is. But if I get it done now, it's one less thing to stress over at the last second."

"But if you read it on a sleep deprived mind, you're less likely to recall anything you typed up. Meaning you'll have to reread it…. And depending on how dead tired you are, might have to rewrite it. Who knows what sleepy you thinks makes a good deal?"

"Hey! Sleepy me is perfectly capable of working without my brain's input."

Leaning over the counter to rest on her crossed arms, Mari tilted her head slightly to pout up at him.

"Yes but perhaps it'd be best to do so tomorrow and get your brain's input at the same time to save time? Come on, just put on a video or something mindless. I'll keep you company."

Her logic was sound. There was no argument Tim could give that would actually work in his favor on the matter, but hearing a slight sigh of defeat still gave her an immense sense of victory. Peering over at her, he decided turnaround was fair.

"Alright… but if we're not going to work, you should be trying to sleep. Im cutting you off." He said, pulling her mug out of her reach only to find it empty. Sighing, he moved to set it in the sink only to see her take up his own, carrying it over as well.

"In that case, so should you," she smirked, washing out both mugs and setting them to dry before taking up his laptop, grabbing his wrist, and tugging him towards the living room.

'How did I not see that coming? That was the obvious outcome… when Was the last time I slept,' Tim wondered, not really paying mind to Mari as she situated them both on the couch, turning the screen to face them both from the coffee table, youtube pulled up and a vine compilation being queued up to play.

…..

Half an hour later, the two were passing jokes back and forth, sleepy giggles and references whispered into the dark room, laptop forgotten and asleep before them, both too out of it to think of moving back to their rooms. Only to be broken up by a mewling yawn, Mari slumping further down, sleep finally pulling at her.

It didn't quite hit Tim that something about the situation was slightly off till Marinette curled into him from where he slouched into the corner of the couch, head dropping onto his chest.

Ah, Fuck. Damian was going to kill him.

Nudging her slightly till she hummed to him, he tried to gently wake her back up fully.

"Mari, shouldn't you go back to your room now?"

It had the opposite effect.

Mari sprung up, eyes wide, blush flushing up her cheeks, seemingly not having realized she had been cuddling up to him till just then.

"I am so sorry. I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable! I keep forgetting you guys like warning beforehand. Either way I should have asked if you minded though. That was so invasive of me and the last thing I want is to invade your space when it's not warranted or wanted. I promise it won't happen again Tim, I'm so sorry."

Finally stopping to take a deep breath from her rambling, Tim jumped in, panicking to think he was causing her distress.

"No no, Marinette, it's fine! You're a very tactile person and frankly I don't mind it. I just know Damian wouldn't like finding you cuddling up to me, or anyone for that matter, especially in the middle of the night when he thought you were in your room, that's all."

That seemed to stop her in her tracks. Settling back down, she fixed him with a thrown look.

"I mean… I know Dami can be protective at times, but I don't think he'd be that upset by it. Maybe a touch put off, but I think he'd tease me more than anything?"

Now he was thrown for a loop. This went against everything he knew about his little brother… that could only mean bad things.

"... Really."

"Yeah, as I said, he knows I'm a cuddly person when I'm tired. Plus, your his brother. At least he knows and trusts you. He'd just make fun of me for being so clingy. Sorry again about that by the way."

Narrowing his eyes, Tim couldn't see a hint that she was lying, but still he had to push to be sure. The last thing he needed was Damian to feel like his position was being threatened. That's what sparked their rivalry the first time after all.

"Hmm... I took Damian to be the possessive type. Especially over someone he was seeing. Trust me, Mari, he's not going to like his girlfriend cuddling anyone. Especially not me."

"Holy Tikki, what?!"

"Tikki?"

" You think… you think Dami and I are dating?!?!"

"Be quiet, you're going to wake someone up!" He rushed out, trying to cover her mouth, only for her to evade, eyes blown wide with shock but still aware enough to dodge his grip.

"No, hold up. You seriously thought we were together?" She spoke in a startled tone, grabbing at his hands to make him stop reaching at her face and concentrate on her words.

Finally giving up on keeping her quiet, Tim actually started processing her words.

"You're… not?"

"No! Of course not! Did he say we were?"

"Well no but… I just assumed. He doesn't like anyone and yet acts like your his personal sunshine."

Giggling, she shook her head, settling back into the couch at his side.

"Yeah, that's only in front of others. Says no one needs to know what a chaotic being I am. His words not mine."

"Oh. So you guys really aren't..?"

"Nope," she chuckled, popping the p, slowly curling back into his side.

Stopping abruptly, she pulled back a bit and glanced up to him, blush dusting the top of her freckled cheeks.

"Is.. Is this okay?"

Now assured that he wouldn't be promptly attacked just for letting Marinette near him, he couldn't see why not. Plus, she obviously took comfort in it and needed sleep. Who knows if she'll find any alone in her room. Wrapping an arm around her and tugging her slowly down, he nodded.

"I already told you I don't mind. Plus, your warm."

Humming her thanks, she burrowed herself under his chin and promptly passed out, Tim following only moments after.

…..

Tim woke up late in the morning, having slid down the cushion and twisted up his limbs with Marinette's who was still half on top of him. By some stroke of luck, they hadn't been disturbed by anyone thus yet. (Dick had already passed through and took a picture to send to the group chat. Who knew the way to make Tim sleep was to pass out on top of him?) Feeling her shift, he looked down to see bleary blue eyes blinking back at him from under messy bangs. A small smile lit her lips and she moved up giving a light kiss to the underside of his jaw, before slowly getting up.

"Thanks Tim. Probably the best sleep I've had in a long time. We should nap sometime…. Maybe watch a movie first," she suggested, flushing but sending a coy, eager look his way.

Nodding, he could only think one thing.

'Welp. She's going to be the death of me."

#timari #timinette #dc x mlb #maribat

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thewhizzyhead · 3 years

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djdjfjg aa you like it??? jsjdjfjf 🥺🥺 it was mostly just a bunch of me being sad and wishing for viet rep so the fact that it’s not. an entire mess is very gratifying-

honestly I started wanting to sort of continue writing it as a middle finger to Miss Saigon-

(the musical. not the actual Miss Saigon, I want to make it clear that my issues are with the freaking musical I hate it so much aaa-)

(let’s just say that despite it being a musical about South Vietnam, they sold Ho Chi Minh/Vietcong flags as merchandise and wHAT THE HOLY FUDGE-)

(there are a lot of things I have issues with regarding that musical but whatever that’s besides the point)

So basically a few other things I planned out is “trà sữa boba” which is either gonna be the chapter title/a song name... idk why but I sort of want to write it in music form now- but basically trà sữa boba translates to “boba milk tea” and basically, the boba place where linh and renn meet is basically the hangout place for the the vietnamese high schoolers. and like, one day linh and renn are hanging out there again, and they’re sitting at a table together and chatting while linh reads a college ap textbook she borrowed from the library to prepare for scibowl (this is projecting my friend onto linh here-)

(Renn is very concerned for Linh’s well being)

and so then we meet renn’s friend, aiden, the resident awesome non-binary gay who works the counter at the boba place every day after school (their dad is the manager). and Aiden is all “emmm oiiiiiii come here and help meee” to which Renn shoots back “I’m not your em-“

(em is the honorific for people younger than you but old enough to be your sibling/younger sibling)

so Aiden just comes back with “oh my bad, ba già” which basically means old lady, and linh goes pfffft and is trying not to laugh, which leads to Aiden and linh talking and introducing themselves and like Aiden is low key platonically flirting, and then suddenly renn is jealous but confused because she doesn’t. like linh that much. so why-?

then Aiden has to go take someone’s order, and they’re alone again. and linh notices Renn angrily sipping her boba, and is like “are you jealous?” and renn almost dies until she finds out Linh thinks that she has a crush on Aiden and now Renn is half-dying for many reasons

so they just keep chilling until Renn notices Aiden literally arranging mint leaves into a heart before placing the order down in front of this other guy (Kendrick) (whom Aiden ded has a crush on) and so obviously Renn teases him and asks why Aiden never gives her a little mint heart, which leads to linh making a comment as to how there seems to be a community of its own at the tea shop. so this transitions into more of the regulars entering the boba shop and a general vibe of we all know each other, and found family babyyyyy (also I present to you “plus we’ve got nhiều người bê đê / hell yeah we’re here to stay / let’s all reclaim the name / be proud of our ways” and basically nhiều người bê đê means lots of gays aha- and bê đê means gay but it’s often used in a derogatory way so yeah-)

then that transitions into “the other Vietnamese culture club,” because basically all of the regulars are viet kids who aren’t a part of the viet culture club (which Linh is the president of) at the high school for various reasons, such as not fitting in/not being “nerdy” enough aka this is basically the self-established viet teens gsa, and Linh gets roped into their meetings, where she’s like oh no. is there member confidentiality?? and renn is like relax I haven’t been outed yet, you won’t be either and then suddenly goes. shoot did I just come out to linh and why do I care so much? meanwhile linh is like oh gosh does she know?? and why am I slightly happy by the fact that she like girls too?? what is going on??

haha yeah- might actually. write this somehow. One day. :3

-🍵!!

HIIII I'M BACK FJJSJS sorry for the late response tea anon aaa school shit happened but anyways i am very interested in your Miss Saigon musical rant please do tell me more i'm legit interested! I don't know much about it asides from the fact that Lea Salonga, Rachelle Ann Go and Eva Noblezada were in the show at one point so yea i'm curious!!

Btw aaa I really like the boba milk tea song idea!! I like the found-family-dynamic/tight knit community within the tea shop and i think it would make for a really good musical number!! And i dunno it makes for a good introduction to the atmosphere and the general setting where renn and lihn would hang out together and how that atmosphere would affect them and the development of their relationship YAYYY i'm just rambling incoherently rn cause um yea currently in world religions class and currently very sleepy but i think your idea is really cool!!! And aiden seems really cool!! I hope you'll continue writing this tea anon aaa ur idea is really freaking good and i love it!

#legit tho i'm impressed!#the tea shop thingy would make an astounding musical number #and from a storytelling standpoint it's really freaking good!#i wish i can um elaborate on what i mean by that a little more but wah im not as eloquent in describing those stuffs #but i think it's really cool!!!#also aaa i love renn and lihn already wooo #this is a cool idea tea anon and i hope you'll write it someday!!!#also i am very interested in the miss saigon rant cjsjd #yay tea anon's here!#ask me stuff

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hitchfender · 5 years

Text

@wishforwishes and i were discussing this ages ago, and i’ve finally worked up the courage to do my official ranking of 1989 (deluxe). without further ado:

1. out of the woods 2. style 3. you are in love 4. welcome to new york 5. shake it off 6. blank space 7. wonderland 8. wildest dreams 9. this love 10. how you get the girl 11. i wish you would 12. i know places 13. all you had to do was stay 14. new romantics 15. clean 16. bad blood

to complete this list, i listened to the album in order and wrote a paragraph with my impressions of each track; then i went back and ranked them. i worked very hard on it, and it turned out very long, so it’s all under a read more! please send opinions and reactions ❤️ love u

welcome to new york - honestly, this song is just so fun. the beat drops smooth and satisfying, and when she yells “new york!” just before the bridge it feels like a shout of freedom. the track is lyrically thin, but that doesn’t mean the lyrics are bad, and i think taylor communicated everything she wanted to with them; this first song invites us into the album, and sets us up for a pop-flavoured story of “real love that drives you crazy.”

blank space - this is taylor at her most sardonic and self-aware, tongue firmly planted in her cheek as she sings about bad boys and loving the game. some of her imagery falls flat, and that repetitive drumbeat grates after a few verses, but man, that tongue click was a stroke of genius: bringing the listeners into her world with insolence and irony.

style - this guitar knocks me off my feet every time. here’s where she makes her 80s influences most keenly felt, and where she brings that imagery she’s so famous for to the foreground. she paints her experience with a combination of broad strokes and achingly specific detail, and when it’s over you feel drained and renewed, like at the end of a long drive through beautiful, dangerous terrain.

out of the woods - i don’t know what to say about this one that i haven’t already said, so here it is again. reading the lyrics this song feels almost manic, the chorus losing its meaning and becoming a frenetic howl, the stories she’s telling disassociated and too-sharp, like shards of memories. once you get to the bridge, it starts to sound that way, too - she switches from the more complicitous “we” to an accusatory “you,” and she starts making demands - yet even in this moment of fear and anger there’s tenderness: a sunrise and shared tears. when she seizes her agency with that “oh, i remember” i feel some primal emotion lodge itself like a bullet in my chest.

all you had to do was stay - although i like the way she transitions from vindictive to tender and back again (“you were all i wanted / but not like this / not like this”), the lyrics feel a bit repetitive and the upbeat mood detracts from the meaning she’s trying to express.

shake it off - RIGHTS for these trumpets. and the giggle. some of the vocabulary feels a little forced (hella good hair?), and the production is oddly gapped - there are breaks in the ambient sound that force you to focus on her singing, but this isn’t her best vocal work... but, like, i think i’m concentrating on the wrong thing here. this is a song about letting go of the hate, literally intended for you to lose your mind to in your room at 3 am. i can’t fault the concept.

i wish you would - this start sounds a lot like the opening of style, actually, and these spaced-out electronic drums are straight off ootw. fascinating. moving on: this sounds like a diary entry, which is extremely taylor, but it makes the song come off a bit disconnected. love that line about “a crooked love in a straight line down,” but by the end i’m left with no distinct emotional impression. also literally forgot about it when i was trying to rank the songs.

bad blood - (i know it’s not on the album but i can’t not critique the kendrick verses. “pov of you and me, similar iraq”: L. i like the nod to backstreet freestyle tho.) anyway i feel like i would be more fuck-feminism about this whole thing if it slapped harder, but as it is i’m falling asleep a bit. album version especially. sorry ms swift!

wildest dreams - that’s more fucking like it. this is probably in my top 10 of her songs, from any album. every line of this! the imagery! the dreamy vibes! the way the bridge hits and she lets loose all of that fierceness she’s been holding back (”burn it down”)! i love how the sunset line parallels her own red and rosy makeup, and the dreamy feeling that conveys. also one time i had sex to this song and it was exactly as transcendent as you’d imagine, so.

how you get the girl - i’ll admit i’m not a massive fan of taylor’s favoured “ah” exclamations, but i’ll let em slide because this song goes off. hygtg accomplishes what ayhtdws set out to do: contrasting message and tone with just the right amount of attitude. i love the narrative in this one, too - she tells a clear story with subtle changes to the verses and the chorus. also the sudden vulnerability in her voice when she sings “i don’t want you to go” is like a shock of cold water. masterful.

this love - i can never decide how i feel about this track. the chorus looks almost ridiculous on paper - “this love is good / this love is bad”, seriously? - but god, she sells it, and just like in ootw the ohhs help to create that dreamlike atmosphere. the water metaphors mirror the seagulls on the album cover, by the way, which: mind.

i know places - right off the bat this piano and the way the drums come in late remind me of kanye’s “runaway” - a mirrored version of it, maybe. "runaway” is a warning - he’s laying himself bare, telling his lover he doesn’t plan on changing, exhorting her to run while she can. taylor’s version is a statement of fierce intent: it’s about isolating yourself from the world, making the almost violent choice to remain with your lover despite everything else. they’re songs about escape, but not escapism. anyway i like this song because it’s about harry styles.

clean - this one is boring somehow. like i get it, water metaphors, but the ah-ahs are getting on my nerves again and “hung my head as i lost the war” seems a bit self-consciously understated. maybe i just haven’t felt the specific feeling she’s writing about yet, but until i do this one will remain low on my list.

wonderland - she’s trying to get across this fierce “us against the world” thing, but there’s not enough of taylor’s specialty: those razor-sharp details that make her music feel both universal and infinitely personal. wonderland is all vague allusions to green eyes and getting lost together, full of sound and fury but not signifying much. i am into the i-am-a-woman-and-i-am-fucking-crazy thing, but i need a bit more from her.

you are in love - am i strong enough for this? we’ll see. this track’s got it all -lyrics clean as anything from her earlier discography, backed by those synths that are 80s without feeling like pastiche. i’m obsessed with the dynamics; her choice to use or remove the backing vocals emphasises her own voice, brings out its flaws and makes the song (though it’s quite production-heavy) feel raw. she makes use of her favourite trick, little snatches of memories creating a pointillist picture, but the most affecting line comes (as with so many of her best songs) in the bridge: “you understand now ... why i’ve spent my whole life trying to put it into words.” it’s the only time she mentions herself on this self-effacing track, and the effect is immediate and startling - suddenly we’re in taylor’s shoes, watching a beautiful relationship unfold from the outside, and after a full album of songs about a fragile, doomed love affair, that line lends “you are in love” new depth.

new romantics - i have whiplash but WE’RE ALL BORED! taylor once again proves she’s never read the scarlet letter. come to think of it, a whole lot of these lyrics don’t make sense, so... yup, just googled and max martin and shellback cowrote this one. side effect: it sounds great, and the words are secondary. the old taylor pops out on the bridge to remind us of her broken-heart fantasies (“please leave me stranded”), but it sounds more like parody than ever - maybe that’s growth? a bit like blank space, this track is glaringly self-aware, like she’s daring her critics to condemn her for the foibles she already knows about, and delights in. i don’t hold it against her. god knows she’s earned a little indulgence.

tagging @roseringharrie @complicatedbabyhoneyfreak @faithmp3 @carefisher @dyketaylorswift @harrysdimples @rainbowfragrance13 (hi and welcome!) @harrystylesep @winoharry @archer-wilde @haaaaaaarrry because at some point we’ve liked each other’s taylor swift posts and/or you’ve been very nice while i yelled incoherently about her. love you all more than words and stream lover xoxoxo

#taylor swift #this legitimately... took months (and months of back and forth) which is my fault entirely #love you ian can't wait to hear what you think!!!

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marvelouswritee · 5 years

Audio

Play the Game 3

Roger Taylor x Reader x Chris Evans

gif: @sheer-heart-attacks

plot: Both boys are for you but, since you’ve been busy, there’s been bickering between Chris and Roger. Avoiding responsibilities, you went to Queen’s concert, only to find Roger on top of Chris, throwing punches. Later at the hospital, Chris tells you an observation he made. That’s STILL going on.

masterlist

Part 1

Part 2

author’s note: i know i haven’t posted in a while. SORRY! but, i also know that my original idea for this is john deacon x reader x roger taylor and i ended up replacing john deacon with chris. another apology. i’m just going to give deaky a platform he deserves later on the series. PS: I’m such a mess.

warning: i tried to revise it but i’m not overly confident that it’s revised. i tried. i don’t even know what to put in for the warning.

words:3398

another PS: if you don’t like it, that’s fine with me. everyone has their own opinions. don’t worry this story will get better...

enjoy!

“(Y/N)!” called a voice from the glassed office, “Can you come here for a moment?” His accent was thickly French, but he spoke English like it’s his first language. Most of the girls at work loved him. He had a sharp jaw, chiseled cheeks, perfectly sided chocolate hair. The dimples that form when he smiles. The girls reminisced like they were back to their ‘old days’, where, apparently, they obsess over arrogant and misogynistic men. You found your coworkers rather oblivious over their boss, who only shows his true colors when you’re called into his office.

Standing up, the murmurs are already visible to your ears. She must be shagging him. You scoff and roll your eyes, sick of the ridiculous gossips you’ve heard since the first time you stepped into his office. You wanted to call them out for liking such a man, you didn’t want to get fired like the last time you raged at someone for whispering behind your back. You have gotten bad reviews from your former bosses. You might even think your new boss only hired you for your looks since you did dress more visible that day; wearing a see-through blouse and a mini skirt that covered almost all of your behind.

“Yes, sir?” you popped your head in. He was busy typing. There was already a stack of papers on the side of his expensive typewriter- always bragging about it to everyone. “Coffee? Tea? Anything?” It’s his usual command: drinks. He claims it calms him down. You usually stick your opinions in your thoughts: From what? Bragging?

He pointed at the stack of paper next to his typewriter, his eyes only focused on what he’s typing. “I want you to revise this for me,” he took the heavy stack and placed on the edge of his wooden desk, which is cluttered with papers and books. Despite his arrogance, he’s truly a bibliophile. He doesn’t follow the much more cliche people, who don’t even bother to read anything.

“Right, I’ll be done with it,” you sigh. With the number of papers, you won’t be able to attend Queen’s concert tonight, which you and Roger haven’t hung out much lately because of work, writing, reading, and Chris. You and Chris have been having the time of your lives: always out on dates, cuddling, and making love mostly every night. Sometimes, you were late because of the many rounds you take pleasure in at night. Sometimes you could barely walk from the consequences of lust.

You felt guilty for Roger. You obviously didn’t want to fill your schedule dates with Chris, stressed with work, too busy pressuring yourself to fill your blank pages and write any kind of story. You know you’re too busy with work but, the more you procrastinate in revising whatever story your boss is commanding you to do, the more you feel you have more and less time simultaneously.

You flop on your desk, groaning under your breath. You felt the thickness of the palpable stressful work. Your hands immediately reach for the phone, but you’re fingers are in utter confusion. Who’s number are you going to call first? Chris or Roger? Instead, you went for the person who isn’t on either option.

“Deaky, hi! Can you do me a favor?” you plead as if he hasn’t had enough of your tedious favors of telling Roger and Chris that you couldn’t make it to either a date or the concert. John’s always grateful that you’re calling him instead of Chris or Roger. But, the reason gave him constant pain and jealousy. You two used to talk all the time, even when you’re at work. However, when you got busy with work and your new boyfriend, it’s like the only time you talk to him is just to tell your boyfriend and your best friend that you’re not going to be with either of them. Those mid-day conversations always give him life and then, it was gone like the wind. His heart is still beating for you, though.

“Let me guess: Tell Roger that you won’t be able to go?” John chuckled over the phone, which made you exhale sharply. Caught red-handed. “Don’t worry, I’ll tell him. You probably need to talk to him, though. He’s been looking forward to this and, as his best friend, you know him better than anyone in the band.”

“Am I included in this band?” you tease, followed by a snicker.

“(Y/N),” John said sternly, “I’m serious. He’s been all pouty about you’re always with Chris. He needs his best friend, you know?”

“I understand. Just tell him I’ll make it up.”

You ended the call, starting to read over the hundreds of papers along your afternoon and evening. You took a red pen from your pencil holder, crossing out words that don’t make sense, wrong spelling, wrong grammar, etc. You were focused, but you’re mentally focused on Roger. Your best friend that’s been waiting for your call because he’s been traveling a lot and it’s unfortunate he couldn’t see you as often.

By the time the band got the news, Chris and Roger are both sighing. Roger wanted to impress you since you clearly haven’t seen or heard them perform the past month-- and their new songs. And, along with Chris, he wanted to take you out after the concert, in which he already reserved a private reservation at a nice restaurant you’ve been meaning to visit quite some time now. Two men sit on the brown couch, hearing the incoherent chattering from outside the door. Brian and Freddie are somewhere unknown. Deaky hasn’t even arrived yet. The band knows that John has never been late, and now, he’s going to get all the teasing.

Chris and Roger’s relationship isn’t nice. They only get along when you’re around; they don’t want to ruin your day or make you upset because you’re happy and that’s all they both want. You happy and smiling, laughing alongside Brian, dancing with John, dressing up with Freddie for concerts. Your boyfriend and your best friend didn’t exactly get along when you’re not around. They’d bicker like animals about anything. Roger would usually start and Chris would go along with it. Calmly.

“She hasn’t been around here lately,” sighs Roger, sitting next to Chris.

“Yeah,” Chris agrees, “I miss her.”

It gets Roger angry whenever Chris is around. He’s always showing off. Having a nice car, a nice figure, saying ‘lovey-dovey’ things to you. It makes your heart flutter, it makes you deeply fall in love with him. He makes you happy and you love how he takes care of you when you couldn’t even bother to stand up from your couch because you’re too stuck into the world full of words and menacingly revising.

“Don’t get familiar with me, Evans,” Roger scoffs, the tension rising again.

“Well, don’t just start talking when I’m obviously the only person here.”

“That was a rhetorical statement.”

“Really? I thought rhetorical only works in questions.”

“You wanna take this outside, mate? Because I don’t want to ruin things for you when all the ladies back off because of your broken jaw.” It always starts there. Roger clenching his jaws, whitening his knuckles as Chris toughens up and flex his muscles. Chris doesn’t want to fight anyone, especially your best friend, but, if Roger’s taking it there, Chris is going along with him.

First, it was Roger who jumped at Chris and started throwing raged-filled punches on Chris' face. Chris let him but instantly throws Roger on the ground, off the old and rusty brown couch. He, then, threw a punch that clearly broke Roger’s nose. Roger’s smaller than Chris but, with so much anger in him, he grew stronger like a superhero retrieving their power when they feel defeated, useless. It was as if Roger blasted thunder from his eyes and hands and roll Chris to the side. Roger’s on top and Chris’s face is getting beat up.

Meanwhile, you were stuck at home, intentionally looking at the flier John gave you just a week ago from where they’ll be performing. You stared at it like it’s going to move from your ‘telekinetic’ eyes. That’s it. You got up from your desk, over piling with papers and its smeared red pen revision. You took your coat off the rack and left your small and cozy flat, leaving you all your responsibilities.

You quickly called a cab and, it’s fortunate that the place was just five minutes away, if in a cab. Instead of politely giving the driver the payment, you threw it on his hands and said, “Keep the change.” You slammed the door close and ran in the entrance, where fans arriving with their Queen shirts on. You weren’t late, not at all. A person walked upstage, possibly announcing the band’s arrival but no. She didn’t announce Queen.

“Sorry to tell all the fans but, the performance has been postponed for thirty minutes. Please wait patiently.” The crowd groaned and some yelled, “Boo!” The woman is in deep mortification to let the electrified crowd down. “Drinks in the house for all you Queen fans!” A deep change: The crowd jumped out of their seats and bombarded your space to get to the bar to get more drunk for the night.

“Excuse me, excuse me, excuse me,” you mumbled but they didn’t hear you. You got to the door for backstage, where the guard is distracted by a petite young woman with piercing blue eyes. Thank you, you mouthed to the girl and slipped in the corridors of beige doors. Maybe, the girl got the message since she winked and pursed her lips. Friends were talking, couples were kissing, and newbies were walking around. Your eyes rummaged for the band, then you saw a crowd peeking over a door. There were yellings and commands of, “Stop!” It seemed like a fight has occurred backstage and the bouncer couldn’t care less because he’s too distracted by the woman with perky red lips and revealing clothing. Guess someone is getting it tonight. One’s getting blood and the other one is getting ‘it’.

With you barely know what you’re doing, you pushed the people and terror shined in your eyes. Your mind traveled far away from the chattering crowd, betting on who’s going to win, but your eyes shined with terror. Bystanders were too afraid to stop the band member and a guy they’ve been seeing around town lately. Mostly, they wanted to watch the fight that they’ve been craving for since they haven’t seen one in a long time.

Just a moment later, your mind went back to reality and run to them. Roger is now on top and Chris, once again, getting the deep punch of Roger’s knuckles. “Both of you stop it!” you yell on top of your lungs, deeply wanting to get both of their attention. Roger stopped, mid-way into punching Chris’s face. They were panting, hyperventilating even. “What are you both doing?” Tears were forming in your eyes. You’re already stressed from your arrogant boss and his overspilling papers. You didn’t want your best friend and boyfriend fighting, it’s the last thing you expected them to do. They seemed like they both got along but, seeing them fight, the thought of them being friends is in the bottom of the list.

“(Y/N),” they breathed out simultaneously. You can see Roger’s cheeks turning bright red through the smeared blood coming out of his nose. Chris is the opposite, you could barely see him from Roger’s heavy punches. You quickly debated on which one are you going to help: Chris or Roger?

“Chris,” you crouch down to your bloody boyfriend, “I’m not going to ask you if you’re okay because I know you’re not, but I think we might need to go to the hospital.” Chris nodded and smiled with his bruised lips. He opened his mouth to argue then realized his face is in too much pain with the freshly new purple bruises and blood. You held his head with your delicate hands as you heard footsteps entering the ‘crime’ scene.

“What happened?” Brian asked, using his hands to point the bloody Chris and Roger who’s on his knees with his bloodstained knuckles. Then, an automatic realization hit him. His eyes in shocked landed on Roger’s guilty expression. “Roger?” Brian liked Chris: they’re always sharing their opinions on politics, which is always something they’ve agreed on. They also share the interest of sports teams, which always gives Chris beams when he talks to you about it at night. He likes how he fits in with your friends and, that, he’s not like one of those boys, who don’t even bother talk to your friends- which is a person you have dated before. You liked that guy, but, when he released his true colors, he wasn’t the one for you. He didn’t like that the only friends you have were guys, no girlfriends, whatsoever.

Freddie’s behind Brian just finished shooing away the people, whose ‘boos’ are now fading away to the end of the corridors. “Bloody hell, Roger. What did you do?” he said in an angered tone. Freddie has never gotten mad at Roger outside the recording studio. He’s changed when he met a boyfriend of yours that he actually liked. In which, he made a pact with you about. Freddie reminded you about the infamous pact that you thought would be forgotten. It’s a promise you kept safe over the years of feeling love for Roger. But, then again, Chris came along and things have changed. You like Chris and the feelings for Roger just seems to fade away.

~flashback~

You and Freddie are sitting outside the cafe, his legs crossed while yours are separated. He takes bite out of his cookie while you have eaten most of the delights you and Freddie ordered. He laughs.

“Darling, I love you but, if you’re going to eat every single thing you see, then maybe you should start doing that with men.”

You glared at him with your nasty eyes. He has been telling you to find at least a date since you’re currently suffering from heartbreak. Mary has also been pleading for you to find someone to try and date. You needed to move on from your previous controlling boyfriend. Meanwhile, while he’s already got a new girl on his arms, you stay alone in your cramped apartment and eating a box of fresh pizza, evaporating into your bedroom. You and him dated for a few months; it was fun, but he just likes to control things like he’s planning your future. He angered Roger: he always nagged him, attempts to look like Roger because he’s blond, and tries to play the drums but always ends up breaking the whole set-up. Roger hated his guts with all his heart. You just looked happy- he didn’t want his hatred to get in the way of that.

“Fred, you know I’m over James, I just don’t think I’m ready to find a new man,” you pointed your index finger at him, “Yet.”

You’re now sipping your warm hot chocolate, burning your reddish tongue as it travels down warmly in your stomach. Freddie sits quietly, admiring the view of cars and people that passes by. He looks back at you place your fingers onto your burning tongue.

“Tell me something, (Y/N),” Freddie starts. You gave him hum in response. “When you find a man we like. All of us: Bri, Rog, Deaky. I want you to tell Roger the truth.” This statement confuses you.

“What truth?-”

“That you love him.” It was quiet for a moment. Sooner or later, Freddie broke it, “I want you to tell him that you love him so you can let go of him. If the right guy comes into your life, I want you to let go of Roger as a lover… Promise?”

You taught about it. It was only you told Freddie about the love you’re feeling for your best friend when you two are telling each other the things the both of you need to know. You told him, with all the strongholds in your heart, that you love your best friend. Freddie was in depth of shock. Later that night, you two were both passed out from the amount of liquor that entered yours and Freddie’s system. The next morning, John found the two of you and carried both of you to your designated beds. He cleaned up, as well. By the time you and Freddie woke up, you saw nothing but a clean room. Freddie was snoring on the other room, thanks to the small, concrete walls.

“Alright, I promise.”

~end flashback~

“His face looks beat up right now but, once it’s stitched up, he’s going to be fine,” the nurse says, examining Chris’s beaten face. She rummaged on the cabinet behind her, getting a small first-aid kit. She picks up cotton and dips rubbing alcohol to clean up the dried blood. It took them thirty minutes to get to the nearest hospital, they were lucky enough that Chris wasn’t dying. Roger sits on the other side of the curtain, where he sits with you as another nurse stitches his knuckles and bandages his face.

“Why did you do it?” you asked as the nurse exits, feeling the awkward tension between the man and the woman. She wanted to get away as soon as she can, not wanting to eavesdrop on any conversation the two friends are about to have.

“What?” Roger asked, dumbfounded.

“Why did you beat up Chris, Rog? What did he do?” you wanted the reason. The truth. Why did he do it? What did Chris do? Who fired the first shot? What did the hell happen?

Roger stayed quiet, can’t seem to find a reason good enough for you. He didn’t want to say that Chris and I were both pouty that you weren’t coming to the show so I got mad and decided to fucking punch him in his perfect face that you always talk about. “Well…” that was about the start of Roger’s sentence was and it just ends like a silent loop.

You scoff, sick of Roger’s games. But, that your anger didn’t let you yell at Roger. “You know what? If you can think of a good reason to tell me, you know where I am.” You left, slide the curtain, and slide it back. Roger was left alone, Brian and Freddie getting coffee for everyone. Tonight’s events angered you, especially Roger. Questions fired up in your brain, impatiently waiting to get answers. You, for a certain, didn’t want any fights happening tonight. You wanted to have a nice time singing along at the concert, watching the band perform. You didn’t want to be stuck at the hospital because of two boys that mean a lot to you.

“Everything okay?” you asked Chris, hoping to find out more of what happened. Chris shrugged instead of responding verbally. You found yourself impatient. You needed answers. The feeling was like an untouched lust-- hunger.

“So, what happened? Why did you and Roger get into a fight?” you asked.

He was silent for a while, you felt empathy for him by just watching him stare off space with his stitched face. “I don’t know if I should tell you. Well, you being my girlfriend and all. I had some doubts about Roger. I was going to talk to you about it tonight before the concert but, when John informed me, Roger entered the room and we were both slumped.” Chris sighs.

He continued, “We were sitting next to each other but I can feel the awkward tension, (Y/N). I can see he’s sad about the fact that you’re not going to the concert. We both haven’t seen you in almost weeks. You’ve been busy, seems like there’s no time for me or any of your friends.”

“I’m sorry, but you know I’ve been busy with work and what are you saying, Chris? What’s the ‘doubts’ you’re talking about?”

“Since you being gone most of the time, and me hanging out with your friends because we expected you to be there. I’ve observed some things-”

“What?”

“That maybe Roger still loves you.”

@ken-yee-not @spn-marvel-nerd @heda-mikaelson

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joo-heo-n · 5 years

Text

Rose-Colored

Genre: Fluff/Angst

Member: Minhyuk

Word Count: 1,466

a/n: I wrote this MONTHS ago and gave up on it but because i promised a fic for the holidays and didn’t do that either, I’m uploading this one even though i think its not great. Sorry for being on hiatus too, its been getting harder for me to write these last couple of months. Nonetheless, enjoy!!!

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / (Ongoing)

You heard a knock at your door and you came to realize the time. You quickly made your way to the door and opened it to find Minhyuk ready to go. “Hold on- my shoes-” you said incoherently, leaving the door open for him to step inside as you sprinted into your bedroom.

You came back to Minhyuk as you slipped on one of your shoes and caught him glancing around at the mess in your home. You let out a chuckle and grabbed your keys, “The deadlines are close, can you tell?” you asked playfully and Minhyuk’s eyebrows raised as he chuckled, “Yeah, it looks like an ocean of… Of-” he tried, motioning his hands in circles as he tried to think of a word but failed to do so. “I know, it’s bad, sorry” you commented, gesturing towards the door as he followed after you. “So you’re stressed then?” he asked and you let out a groan as the two of you walked down the stairs, “Yeah, tonight is the only night I have to relax” you admitted and Minhyuk smiled a little, nodding, “Then we should enjoy it” he said and you scoffed and nodded enthusiastically.

You hadn’t laughed so much in months, your cheeks were beginning to feel sore from how hard you had been smiling since the two of you left your apartment. You were amused at how much Minhyuk could talk, and you didn’t want him to stop because for once in a long time, you were able to talk just as much. There was also an undeniable feeling in your chest that made you get excited every time Minhyuk met your gaze while either of you talked. While the two of you walked in direction of where your apartments were, you decided to hook your arm with his as he talked and he stammered a bit with his words before he was proceeding nonchalantly.

You giggled to yourself a bit and when he finished, the two of you found a bench nearby to sit on and you let out a long sigh as your body leaned back against the chilly metal. “It’s been a really long time since I last went out like this” you admitted, your arm still hooked onto his as he glanced over at you while you decided to rest your head on his shoulder. “Honestly, me too” he confessed and chuckled, making you look up at him in question, “Really?” you asked and he nodded, “Moving has taken a toll on my free time” he said and you knitted your eyebrows, “How?” you asked. Minhyuk hummed and looked away, “I had a limited number of friends and now I’m kind of having to start from scratch- I used to live closer to most of them too” he admitted and you watched him curiously.

“I imagined you were a guy of many friends” you said, looking ahead as a car drove past the two of you. Minhyuk chuckled hard and shook his head, “Having few friends is what drove me out of where I used to live” he said, toying with the keys to his apartment. “Why, what happened?” you asked, letting your curiosity control your mouth. Minhyuk hummed again and pressed his lips together, the corners of his mouth turning down and making him look boyish as he blinked slowly and sighed. “Misunderstandings… I argued with one of them and the rest had to take sides so, here I am” he said as if it were no big deal at all to have lost the circle of friends he had, and move across town on top of that.

“I was behind on my end of the rent, because I had used that money to fix my car and pay for my student debt, but he was tight on bills as well, and then one thing led to another and I moved out” he explained with a shrug, meeting your surprised expression which made him grin and giggle as he looked away. “It’s alright though, it was my mistake, and now I get to start over” he added, but you stared at your lap and processed his story, “How could you be okay with losing your friends over something like that?” you asked without much thought. However, when Minhyuk took a second too long to answer, you were quick to take back your question, “You don’t have to answer that, it probably feels like crap and I’m not helping” you said with a nervous chuckle.

Minhyuk smiled a little and shook his head, “It’s okay, there’s always a way out of suffocating situations, and I found mine which made me realize what kind of friends I had in the first place” he said and you nodded slowly, letting his words register in your head. You went back to resting your head on his shoulder, and this time, Minhyuk slipped his hand into yours. You stared at your clasped hands and it felt as if your hand wasn’t actually yours. The feeling had been forgotten a while back, so looking at your hand while it held his was rather odd to you. “We should get going” Minhyuk then said softly, and you raised your head and nodded, the two of you coming to your feet to begin walking down the sidewalk to your apartments.

By the time the two of you were back, you checked the time and realized how late it was. Minhyuk stood before you as you reached your front door and you turned to face him, instantly getting a fluttery feeling in your stomach at the proximity. He seemed to be considering something for a few seconds as the two of you gazed into each other and grinned sheepishly. You had a feeling he was thinking about kissing you, and you wanted him to but something seemed to stop him. He simply took in a sharp breath and exhaled a nervous laugh, “I’m gonna go” he said, beginning to move away but you took his hand and pulled him back, turning around quickly to open the door to your apartment as he stared at you stunned.

You laughed and guided him into your apartment, closing the door behind you as the two of you now stood before each other much like before, but now on the other side of the door. Minhyuk smiled widely, but the smile was soon disappearing and turning into a smirk as he stepped closer to you. You waited against the door excitedly, your hand still in his as his other hand came to rest against your cheek. He kissed you deeply and it made your insides tingle as he did it over and over again. You gripped onto the front of his shirt and kissed him back whenever you could. It was addicting but it promised nothing more intimate, and that was what made you want to never stop. You had pictured this type of scenario the more you spent time with him, and having it actually happen made you want to be that much more careful. You hadn’t dated since you were done with school, and your job hadn’t exactly left enough liberty for you to do so, not to mention most men in your department were married or just as stressed and busy as you.

But Minhyuk had made it feel like your life outside of work was an entirely different one. You felt as if you weren’t even the same person. It was as if your lungs were constantly unable to expand, and with him, they did as far as they could.

Minhyuk pulled away and smiled warmly at you, making you grin sheepishly as the two of you moved onto your couch and you found yourself pinned under him. You had really grown fond of his smile the most, and you liked the warm tingly feeling that had started spreading in your chest the last couple of weeks. He said nothing, simply leaning down to peck your lips gently and lingering over them for a second too long.

You brought your hands to run through his hair carefully, making him smile a little as he then kissed you once more and placed his head on your chest. He let you tangle your fingers in his hair and you analyzed the strands, the red still vibrant and giving a graceful shine to his locks.

You hadn’t seen yourself doing any of this in so long, it scared you a little, but excited you at the same time.

You hadn’t realized how lonely you were within the walls of your apartment and the responsibility of your job. Since Minhyuk had moved in, it was different and disrupted your routine, but right now you liked it that way.

#Monsta X #monsta x minhyuk #monsta x fanfic #monsta x fluff #monsta x scenarios #monsta x imagines #monsta x angst #monsta x au #lee minhyuk #minhyuk scenarios #minhyuk imagines #minhyuk au #minhyuk angst #minhyuk fanfic #minhyuk fluff

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velvet-tread · 6 years

Text

A theory, or wild speculation, or whatever; anyway there’s some Bellarke

Here follows a collection of thoughts that don’t quite add up to a thesis yet

Season 5 had one of the best runs of episodes I’ve seen on this show ever - strong themes, great setups, impactful character beats. 9 straight episodes of near-perfection.

But imo it fell short in the last couple of episodes. How short depends on your perspective, but my feelings about it range from mildly disappointed to Jane Austen mourning weeds and little weepy handkerchiefs. Either way - the collapse into fudgy incoherence and loose ends actually undid all of the great work the show did in the first 9 episodes. WHICH IS FUCKING INFURIATING.

The show painstakingly put together so much excellent character and relationship set ups which either never materialised or didn’t pay off or just fizzled out. And now I’m left wondering what it all meant, which not only frustrates me on a viewer level but also makes me feel like an idiot for wildly overestimating what the show was doing with the material.

*looks at the X Files forever*

Just to pick a few things out at random.

a) Bellarke were put in conflict, but there was no emotional pay-off, the framing was all over the place and the resolution basically a post-script.

b) We spent the series agonising about the wisdom of going to war on a fragile planet, but the actual harbinger of Apocalypse 3.0 (I can’t believe I have to write that) was someone only tangentially related to that storyline, whom every single named character bar Kabby was trying to stop. So was everyone wrong? Or just ineffectual? The latter is far less interesting and more depressing tbh.

c) The worms

d) Memori

e) I could go on

I repeat, I would not be so pernickety if the run up to the s5 finale hadn’t been so good, and the set up so promising. The idea of a reboot was genius. The Bellarke separation was genius. Blodreina = genius. Mama Bear Clarke = genius. Eligius = genius. Spacekru = genius.

But ultimately? Can ANYONE tell me what s5 meant? What difference did any of those things make in the end? What conflict was resolved satisfactorily? I’d argue that the Blodreina/Blake siblings arc worked the best (although *howl* Bellamy was never given any in-universe context for Blodreina) but generally I’m left with the feeling that very few of these stories or conflicts had any meaning whatsoever, and especially not Bellarke.

So I have a theory and I stand to be corrected as ever because I am very much processing.

I think there’s a strong possibility Jason and/or the 100 writers room began rewriting the back end of season 5 as they were filming the early season 5 material.

Given Jason’s comments immediately after the finale, I’m inclined to believe that the rewrites, if I’m right, were mostly around Bellarke and the Flame. Specifically, I think that at some point when they were filming mid-season, Jason changed his mind about how Bellarke-y he wanted the season to be, if at all. And on top of that, I think as he was pitching season 6 around that time, he realised that he wanted to go full-hog with the Flame in season 6.

Those two things might be connected. Perhaps Jason realised the full extent to which he coud “bring Lexa back” without actually bringing back ADC, around the Flame. Perhaps he wants to recreate the show’s Clexa glory days. And perhaps romantic Bellarke isn’t compatible with that vision. Dumb, in my view, but hey.

Perhaps, he just realised that he can’t doesn’t want to write romantic Bellarke.

If that’s the case, then well, *shrugs*. Less satisfying for me, but I don’t own this shit. I do, however, own the prerogative to speculate wildly on how and why they squandered all that promise in the last couple of eps.

Certainly, a mid-season back end emergency rewrite would explain a few things:

1.The loose threads and wonky framing

For example, Clarke’s fury at Bellamy for putting the Flame into Madi’s head was just...dropped? Why? When it was SUCH A BIG DEAL in 509? What were we supposed to the think about that? What was she? And Bellamy, who didn’t appear to even remember who Clarke was until he saw her at the ship, being angry at her? Really? Where? Since when? And importantly - why?

I’m a writer and it’s my experience that the best planning you do for a piece is when you approach it at the start. You brainstorm. You get your thoughts together. You address each problem and question and mould it into a whole so it all makes sense.

But when you finish the thing and you look at it and you think - the thesis is wrong! I need to restructure the entire thing! That’s when mistakes get made. Especially if, for example, you’re up against a deadline or in this case a filming schedule, the threads that you would usually pick up at the planning stage or in the editing stage get missed. And because they are part of the final editing process, there’s nobody around to pick them up and properly address them.

Result? Fudge.

2. The curious ambivalence about Becho.

Look I ADORE Becho. They are soft, and loving and real af. I fully believe that was always intended to be the case.

I think Becho was set up as a benchmark, for Bellamy in particular, a symbol of his peace and prosperity in space,. And, of course, I think it was also set up as a point of conflict for Octavia and Clarke. In the case of the latter, it was definitely a silent love triangle. How do you explain the love triangle framing on two separate occasions? How else do you explain the two separate interviews Jason gave about love triangles?

But here’s what Becho was not set up as: a relationship that was supposed to develop on-screen and take the audience with it. Becho had no arc this season. It wasn’t “a story” per se, however much Tasya and Bob’s chemistry electrified me. It was the backbone to *other* stories.

So, why, then, were Becho given every single Bellarke beat, especially towards the end? A background of forgiveness? Check. A steadying influence on each other. Check. The person they’re fighting for? Check. Plotting together? Check? Battle couple? Check.

Contrast with Bellarke. Forgiveness? That’s something for Bellamy and Madi to discuss without Clarke! Battle plans? Clarke will do that with Echo instead (oh my GODDD my ot3 came to life there *clutches hands and wishes upon a star*). A steadying influence on each other? Maybe! Until they forget each other’s names when they’re not in a scene together! People they’re fighting for? Definitely not each other.

Meanwhile bts, the messages were VERY confusing. So the show was giving us a Becho that, while very real, was not the core of the story. Which was probably why, in early season 5, some deep Becho nods (the extra forehead touch, the “I love her”) found their way on to the editing room floor. All legit. But then, the script-to-screens then BROUGHT THOSE THINGS BACK to the viewer’s attention? Why? Why give us those things even though they were cut? Was it because maybe, the show had changed direction after the fact?

And don’t get me wrong. I loved every second of the show’s affirmation of Becho. I still adore them. But how does it fit into the jigsaw of the show as it stands? It doesn’t really. In fact, if you just swap Echo for Clarke in Bellamy’s storyline this season, you would have a hard time telling me that this isn’t exactly what romantic Bellarke would look like - the only difference is that in terms of screentime, Becho’s antagonism has had far more time, and Bellarke’s forgiveness/working together has had more time. IN-UNIVERSE, IT’S THE OTHER WAY AROUND. It’s why shipping Becho comes so easily for me. And if the show wanted to frame that as Clarke’s personal tragedy, I would get it and probably relish it. But the trouble is, I’m having a hard time understanding what the show *is* saying about Becho and Bellarke, because it seems to be constantly changing its mind.

WHICH. BY THE WAY. MADE THAT ENTIRE WAKE-UP MARPER VLOG SEQUENCE A MASSIVE DAMP BELLARKE SQUIB.

SORRY.

3. The Flame suddenly jumping to prominence as a tool rather than as a symbol late in the season.

The show went from framing the Flame as a threat to this kid, who had hidden from it her whole life, for whom it meant literal nightmares of people burning at the stake, something for Clarke to rightly protect her from, to something that turned her into a mouthpiece for Lexa, to Clarke’s hostility to it being framed as “wrong”. There was an abrupt change of tone imo, to Clarke’s fears being justified to Clarke’s fears making her, and I quote Jason from an interview that nearly made me choke on my cereal, a “helicopter” mum.

Excuse me while I punch the nearest object to smithereens.

The Flame “gave” Madi battle ideas (which were different from Octavia’s how, exactly?) by Gaia’s bedside, with just a MANTRA? That whole scene felt cobbled together at the last minute. Like a film student’s badly edited homework.

It’s giving Clarke life lessons, ffs!

*clenches fist*

The whole thing feels like a season 5 retcon, hastily put together to justify Madi still having the thing in her head for season 6, when it can do it’s victory lap for real.

4. The scenes that were dropped

a) Bob and Eliza both referenced a big Bellarke scene that got cut. My guess? Not a romantic scene but some kind of Hakeldama that allowed them to hash out their various beefs with each other and probably involved some shit talking about the Flame.

b) And like, if that scene had some tenderness in it? Too Bellarke maybe? No, Bellarke BAD BAD BAD *stern looks*

c) also, wasn’t Echo supposed to have a sad scene of sitting in the snow and remembering Azgeda? That was supposed to be at the snowy back end of the season, but Echo had no sads really. Only fierce spacekru love and some cuddles and some good sexy time. Was there an Echo sad that got cut? What was it related to?

5. The writers room walkout

Yeah. I don’t know what that means, but it sure means something.

Just fyi...for some context. I love Becho and they currently own my heart but until recently Bellarke was very much my otp. Probably, deep down, it still is.

But I’m getting tired of running this race. I have no problem with the show doing a slow burn. I have no problem with platonic Bellarke. But I need consistency and, importantly, I need the show to remember that Bellarke are the backbone of this show. Their relationship - however you frame it - is the heart and without it the show is nothing but a collection of Elon Musk conspiracy theories on reddit.

JUST LETTING THEM HAVE A CONVERSATION =/= BELLARKE ROMANCE.

If you want them platonic, fine, you win. But gutting their relationship from the inside out to try to ward off the sniff of shipping is just counterproductive. It’s the lack of real, meaningful connection that really turned me off Bellarke this season, not the lack of kiss or lack of romantic framing. Early in the season? Yes, the set up was all there and it looked GREAT. But their conflict never got off the ground and we never got a cathartic resolution to show us the characters really, truly mean something to each other.

Ultimately the show forgot that they were friends who love each other, and I just *clenches fist* can’t ship that. Maybe that’s what the show wanted. But the flipside is that at this point I’m not really invested in their relationship in any context, which is why the end shot left me cold. I hope Bellarke hasn’t died in my heart forever but...idk it doesn’t look good.

#bellarke #rip my beautiful earth babies #you'll have a special place for me forever #but i can't run this obstable course anymore #bellamy blake #clarke griffin #tagging becho #too #also don't send me hate #i'll block you

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ijustcantwaittobeme · 5 years

Text

Gratitude & celebratory confetti when applicable.

*waves* Hello everyone! I hope everyone can forgive my incoherency here. I am writing this at a late time (nearing 5AM) but I might schedule it to come out at a different time.

Gah, I feel weird making a post like this. The last thing I want for it to be is something that can come across as - I don’t know - like it’s an attention grabbing thing if that makes any sense?

Probably doesn’t make a lot of sense since I haven’t explained much yet. Sorry. ^^’ I just don’t want it to come across in a bad say becaus I don’t think my birthday is off any importance. ^^’

And I’m kind of rambling so I’ll ty the keep reading thing to help with this not spamming your dashboards too much. ^_^’

But yeah the fifth of January is my birthday. ^_^’

I’m mentioning this and wish to share it with all of you because you make such a huge difference in my world and life that I want to give something back to you guys as well, even if its just something random about me.

Which sounds weird but please know that I mean well. ^^’

I still can’t believe how lucky I am to be here and a part of this community with you guys. ^_^

Getting to be here and know you is truly one of the best things that my life has offered me so far.

I know I have been in and out a lot recently due to health and holidays but I truly cherish and appreciate you all. I don’t know how I ever got so lucky.

And to the ones who I am just now getting to know, *waves* hello!

I don’t know who might be reading this but I also just wanted to say hello to those who I have yet to meet on here or actually say hi to officially! Seeing your creations & involvement within the community is wonderful!

I just - I don’t ever pester you guys but I hope that you enjoying being here in the community as well!

(And if it isn’t to bold of me to say here - I look forward to saying hello someday and getting to know you as well - if you are comfortable with it that is! No pressure if that’s not your thing,) ^_^’

Anyway - I’ll wrap this up because I have an early morning but just - wanted to say hello, leave a thank you note of sorts and share my birthday with you all because getting to be here, be a part of things and more importantly, getting to know so many lovely people within the community on here is something that means a lot to me.

As you can tell, I’m awkward this evening, especially on actually knowing how to talk about my birthday haha but to summarize;

If celebratory gestures are a thing to make birthdays a Happy one then I can say with certainty that there’s no better way than getting to be here with you guys. :D

So, thank you again for being a part of my world and for letting me a part of yours. <3

I’ll uh - quit wearing my heart on my sleeve now but just - know that you guys are awesome and I hope that you all can have something fun and exciting to look forward to this weekend! *waves for now* ^_^

#zr community and fandom #zr #personal drabble #a birthday post and my anxiety doesn’t know how to handle it #is it too rude or egotistical of me to share?#i don’t know but I’m going to risk it and post this anyway #because you guys are awesome and I just don’t say thank you enough #so - thank you guys #hope you are all doing well and have something exciting to look forward to this weekend! :D #sorry if I took up a lot of space on your dash by the way ^^’#i was hoping to spare any eyesores by using the keep reading thing. ^^’

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softfics9 · 7 years

Text

Post-Its - Chapter 5/5

Fandom; SF9

Main Pairing; Kim Youngbin/Kim Inseong

Side Pairings; Kim Seokwoo|Rowoon/Baek Juho|Zuho

Genre; Fluff, Slow Burn, College AU

Trigger Warnings; Mentions of alcohol, hinted past emotional abuse

Word Count; 2,624

Rating; PG-13

Beta’d; No

Cross-Posted on; AO3

Other Chapters; Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4

Authors Notes/Closing Comments; So this was my first full length chaptered fic! I hope you enjoyed it! I am working on four more fics in this universe (I wanted to make them one-shots but it hasn’t turned out that way). I’ll be going back to university myself in a week so I may not get as much written in that time, but I would like to keep writing as much as possible! Thank you for reading <3

The days seemed to pass by dreadfully slowly until the following Friday came around. Youngbin often caught himself drifting off in the middle of lectures, thinking about what his housemate would be like in person. He had looked up quite a few recipes for meals he would be able to make, and with Seokwoos help had finally narrowed it down to two options that were relatively simple. The three youngest accompanied him to the supermarket that weekend after the dance club finished up their practice, he was going to get all the necessary ingredients for both dishes and just let Inseong decide on the night. “He doesn’t have any allergies right hyung? Or any aversion to certain foods?” Taeyang was always looking out for things like that, but Youngbin assured him that Inseong loved all foods and had no allergies. They had confirmed things like that when they started doing grocery lists together, to make sure neither of them would have a bad reaction to anything they brought into their apartment. It really was so domestic, and Youngbin couldn’t wait until he finally would be able to put a face to the name, and a voice to the notes on their fridge.

Inseong was having second thoughts about agreeing to the whole dinner thing, just the two of them alone in their apartment. Not because he didn’t want to meet Youngbin, not at all, but rather because of how useless he felt. Youngbin had already said he was going to cook, and had two options in mind, so all that was left for Inseong to do was show up. It was Wednesday and he was lying in the middle of his bedroom floor with his entire wardrobe scattered around him. He had spent the last two hours trying to decide what he was going to wear since it was very important to him that he looked good. Kim Youngbin was gorgeous, Inseong had seen him in the start of term dance open in his sleeveless tank top and shorts, and his arms and legs were no joke. That was before he knew they were actually living together and thinking back on it made it even worse.

“Sanghyukkie~ I need help choosing what to wear on Friday. What time are you finished classes today?”

In his desperation, he rang his friend, Jaeyoon would have been more of a help in the realm of fashion but he was away on a university field trip today and so could not come and help him out.

“Hyung you know I stay late to work in the radio club on Wednesday, you’ve got loads of really nice clothes and it’s just a casual dinner. Why are you stressing so much? I gotta go ok? Don’t forget to eat before work!”

He sighed as his youngest friend ended the call and threw his phone onto the pile of shirts beside his bed. There was no reason for him to be worrying so much, that was true, but first impressions were important and Inseong really wanted his housemate to look at him and think “Woah”. There was nothing he could do with what he currently had, he would just have to go shopping before work tomorrow instead. With that decided he spent the next half hour diligently cleaning up his self-made mess and got ready for work. On his way out the door, as an afterthought, he grabbed a small shopping bag to bring with him. If Youngbin was going to be making the food, then the least he could do was supply them with some alcohol. At least that way if things got awkward they had a backup plan.

Friday arrived none too soon and Youngbin was a nervous wreck. He hadn’t been able to concentrate at all and for the first time in his four years, he skipped out on his afternoon lectures for reasons other than illness or dance practice. He didn’t have the capacity to feel guilty though, as he was poring over the two recipes again to make sure he had absolutely everything. It was weird being in the apartment during the day he decided, he hadn’t gotten to think about it much when he was here scrambling to write a Post-It the week before, but it felt very strange. Youngbin sighed and ran his fingers through his hair, there was nothing else he could do other than wait for Inseong to get back. The situation he was in suddenly struck him and the nervous butterflies increased ten-fold. He was never here during the day, he only ever arrived back after Inseong had left for work, his housemate was going to be home from his classes any minute and would not be expecting him there, it was another two hours before they were supposed to meet. Youngbin decided he would wait it out in the library and was just out of the kitchen when the front door opened.

A guy he could only assume was Inseong walked in through the front door of the apartment, and Youngbin felt his breath hitch at the sight before him. His housemate had soft brown hair that fell across his forehead in a fringe. He was wearing the cutest round glasses and was dressed simply in a white t-shirt, oversized black cardigan and jeans. He had headphones on so hopefully didn’t hear Youngbins gasp of surprise. When he looked up, a pair of intelligent brown eyes met his and for a split second the world stopped spinning.

Inseong screamed, not in fright but more from the shock and embarrassment of the situation. He had thought he would have at least an hour when he got back from his classes to get ready to meet Youngbin. Yesterday he had dragged his two friends out to buy new clothes and had come home satisfied with an outfit that he felt said “classy but cool”. But now here he was standing in their entry hall, wearing his glasses and a casual outfit in front of the guy he’s had on his mind 24/7 this last week. And he looked stunning, a three-tone knitted sweater, with a pair of jeans, and his hair falling casually across his forehead. It was unfair and his loud mouth decided screaming was the best response to the situation. It really wasn’t and Youngbins face creased with worry and what seemed like guilt at his reaction. Before he could even get his head back to normal, suddenly Youngbin had crossed the space between them, and all Inseong could see were his pink lips moving and hear violins in his head. He then realised he still had his headphones on, and his cheeks flushed pink in more embarrassment.

Youngbin had panicked when the guy across from his screamed and the only logical response his body could think of was to move closer, he ended up closer to Inseong than was necessary and while he had stopped screaming Youngbin couldn’t help but stare at his pretty lips. Then his housemates hands had come up in front of his face and his attention was drawn upwards, to where nervous eyes were staring at him as he took his headphones down from his ears.

“Um, hi? I’m Inseong.”

His voice was lower than Youngbin expected, and it was soft and velvety, there was a slightly husky quality to it too. There was a strange aching in his chest and the sudden desire to ask Inseong to sing to him, but he hurriedly shook that thought away. Then he realised he had been staring and not replied and felt himself turn bright red.

“Oh yeah um, hi. I’m Youngbin your housemate, you probably figured as much, but you screamed and I just wanted to assure you I didn’t break in or something.”

Inseong was slightly taken aback by how soft and raspy his housemates voice was, it was certainly not what he had expected from someone who held a leadership role. Although he was surprised, there was a desire to hear more and more of his voice.

“Yeah, I guessed so. I just honestly wasn’t expecting you to be here that’s all. I’m sorry if I frightened you.”

“No no I wasn’t frightened, just worried about you.”

Youngbin smiled sheepishly and Inseong laughed a little as he scratched the back of his neck. They were finally meeting face-to-face after almost two months of living together and while it was a relief, there was an obvious awkwardness in the air.

“Ahem – well why don’t I just go put away my bag and that and we can discuss the plan for dinner?”

It was so tense, and both of them could feel it although neither knew what the other was thinking. Youngbin nodded and went to go move himself back towards the kitchen, shuffling his feet as he went. Inseong gladly escaped into his room and threw his stuff down onto his bed, he felt like crying. There was no way he would be able to get changed without it seeming suspicious, and he didn’t want Youngbin thinking he saw this as a date or anything. He quickly freshened up by washing his face and putting on a bit of makeup that showed off his cat-like eyes, and shot a distress text to his friends. This was going to be a longer night than expected and he needed them to be prepared for an intervention.

Youngbin heard the door to Inseongs room shut and immediately dropped to the floor, his heart was racing so fast he was surprised it hadn’t been heard by the other. After taking a few shaky breaths he sent a possibly incoherent string of messages to the group chat before attempting to fix his hair a bit. He stood awkwardly by the ingredients he had bought and waited. While he was waiting he couldn’t help but let his mind wander to his housemate. He was definitely one of the most beautiful guys Youngbin had ever met, and that’s saying something after being to one of Seokwoos fashion club meetings before, where he had met an actual angel by the name of Cha Eunwoo. But Inseong just looked so casually handsome, and yet incredibly intelligent at the same time, and Youngbin knew he was a goner.

When his housemate came back out and into the kitchen Youngbin swore he felt the breath knocked out of him again. There weren’t any noticeable differences to his outfit, but his glasses were gone and eyes looked so sharp and piercing, he couldn’t tear his gaze away. Inseong may have smirked a little at the open-mouthed look Youngbin was giving him, and thought that perhaps he had a chance after all.

Dinner actually turned out to be a very enjoyable affair, after deciding on which of the two dishes they wanted to eat Youngbin quickly set to work. Inseong offered his assistance by chopping vegetables and handing over the required cooking utensils, but for fear of somehow poisoning the food he refrained from doing any of the actual cooking. They got the chance to make small talk during the process, learning a little more about what they studied and family life. Youngbin talked animatedly about his dancing and Inseong retold stories from his year living in London.

As they were getting ready to sit down, meal fully prepared and two hungry stomachs grumbling, Inseong pulled out a bottle of white wine from the fridge, cocking his eyebrow cheekily. Youngbin laughed and nodded enthusiastically, they didn’t need alcohol to help the conversation but it would be a nice accompaniment to their food. One glass turned to two and then three, and while neither of them were drunk there was a freer way of speaking between them. They decided that the dishes could wait until the next day to be done, and Youngbin made his way over to flop face first onto the couch. It had been a perfect evening, the two getting to know each other and chatting like old friends about past experiences. He was content to just lay there and let the alcohol buzz through his system when something cold touched his cheek.

“I knew you went to bed early, but it’s only nine in the evening, you’re not falling asleep on me just yet are you?”

There was a playful tone to Inseongs voice, and when he turned his head he saw the taller man crouching beside the couch with several bottles of soju in hand. He had a wicked grin on his face and Youngbin felt hot all of a sudden. But he could hold his alcohol pretty well, at least by his friend’s standards, and there was no way he would turn down such an obvious challenge. Not to mention, it would be more time spent getting to know his housemate so he was not going to refuse. He swung himself into a seated position on the couch and patted the newly available space next to him. Inseong was not expecting the daring grin on his housemates face, but it could only mean good things. So he plopped himself down, possibly closer than Youngbin was expecting and definitely closer than necessary, but he was on a high from the food and the wine and the positive feeling he got from their time together so far, and didn’t want it to end just yet.

“A toast then, to finally meeting each other after so long.”

Youngbin raised his bottle to that, and they both took a big swig, for courage. The bitter alcohol burned its way down his throat but it was enough to keep him grounded in the moment. The further into their bottles they went, the more personal the conversation became, telling stories that few others knew of. Youngbin opened up about Youjin, who his friends knew about, but also Seungjun, someone they didn’t, recalling his first time actually sleeping with another guy and the hurt he felt when he realised he had been used. Inseong in turn told him of Johnny but also about Jaehyun, and a trip to Oido that he had never shared with anyone before. It was private and personal, and the pair felt themselves growing closer as the night progressed. Eventually they reached the end of the stash, and both a little more than tipsy they called it a night. As they were about to part ways at their respective rooms, Youngbin grabbed Inseong by the wrist.

“I really had a great evening with you, it was nice getting to know you better and just talk.”

“Yeah it was, I’m glad we’ve gotten close enough to share personal things like we did.”

Inseongs voice dropped lower under the influence of alcohol, and Youngbins soft raspy tones were close to inaudible. But in the little space between them, they heard everything and felt the bond that was something more than just friendship become solidified. As they both nodded and moved away, Inseong couldn’t stop himself from saying something stupid.

“You know, I’ve kept them all. The Post-Its I mean.”

There was an unreadable emotion in Youngbins eyes as he turned to look at him, but he smiled softly and tilted his head to the side.

“Me too. Goodnight Inseong.”

When the two bedroom doors and their occupants lay down in bed, all was quiet and peaceful in the apartment. Only now, the awkwardness and nervous energy that had been bouncing around since the start had dispersed, and was replaced by a more intimate bond and understanding. They would both make more time to see each other, they knew that much. But what they didn’t know yet, was how much they would make their little time count.

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hunkkeiths-blog · 7 years

Note

So I just scrolled 20000 years back on your blog like the creep I am and I saw you mention schizophrenic Keith headcanons but never actually saw schizo Keith headcanons and I'm 👀👀👀

once again thank you so much for sending this! i really really love this au but i never talk about it bc i feel like no one cares and this makes me sooo happy!

also sorry again for answering late i just wanted to be able to type everything relatively quickly and use a readmore

(i added links that lead to wiki pages to explain what certain stuff is, you don’t need to click them or anything)

ok so here goes

[Food mentions and slight emeto for this part]

Keith has a lot of trouble with food, both bc of sensory issues and paranoia

when its sensory, its mostly if the texture is too different to whats hes used to, or if theres too much taste and theres anything else (a sound, some lights flashing, whatever) hell get overwhelmed really easily. so he tries to stick to relatively tasteless stuff

Keith also gets a lot of persecutory delusions and some of the most recurring ones is that his food has been poisoned, having relatively tasteless food helps with not being as convinced of that

On good days (well as good a day as you can have when you think your food has been poisoned anyway), he can sort of just power through it and eat enough to not be starving.

On bad days, he either doesn’t eat at all, or if he only realises it after having eaten he becomes sick/makes himself sick.

Back on Earth, especially during his year alone, he had 3-4 “trusted foods/brands” and he almost exclusively only ate those

Once on the ship, things get very complicated, because from the start, he doesn’t trust the altean food goo (he still doesn’t if he’s entirely honest, but they’ve all been eating it and none of them are dead yet so if it is poisoned its slow acting enough) so he mostly only eats when hes absolutely starving for the first month or so before he slowly starts to eat more of the altean meals

He does however trust what Hunk cooks partly because he trusts Hunk, partly because Hunk eats it too, and (taste+texture of the food goo aside) hes always more comfortable when Hunk cooks.

[Warning ended]

While developing and after when he had it (which was 2 or 3 years before he entered the Garrison), Keith ended up almost entirely isolated from people, in part because he would willingly withdraw from others, in part because the people who took care of him after his father left/died (foster families i guess? i dont really know how the system works and i cant imagine how much worse it must be for a schizophrenic kid so) didn’t really know what to do with him because he had really bad emotional blunting

Because he was mostly left alone, he started focusing alot on the delusions he had at the time, the main one of which was that he just wasnt human (which yes turned out to be somewhat true, but it’s still a delusion). that led him to thinking of going to space because of a feeling that something would happen there. which led him to the garrison which is how he ended up there.

At the Garrison, he was amazing at flying and mediocre at best in all his other classes.

This is partly because outside of doing stuff that could actually directly get him to space, he wasnt able to get any motivation to do anything else. (even if he gets kicked out, he can just steal a rocket or something right?)

he also didnt really have any friends because he didnt approach anyone and more or less actively avoided anyone trying to get close to him.

the way he just was; never showing any emotion, barely speaking, the weird things he sometimes did, etc; sort of drove ppl away on its own

(this is also sort of the reason he didnt remember him and lances “rivalry” in s1ep1. he never actually noticed lance thought of him as a rival, he just thought lance was sort of loud)

Shiro ended up like being a mentor or something to Keith, and Keith wasnt able to really avoid him

They start off sort of rocky, because Keith hates interacting with other people, due to paranoid thoughts (”he can read my mind”, “he wants to hurt me”, and so on) that, while they werent nearly as bad as off meds, were still present even with medication.

Slowly though, Keith warms up to Shiro and starts trusting him (though shiro is never really sure because Keith doesnt show it at all)

Keith starts doing better in all his classes, because he’s interpreted that shiro will be extremely disappointed in him if he ends up getting kicked out because of poor grades, and hes terrified of disappointing literally the only person in the world he trusts

It also leads to Keith putting a minimum of effort into becoming at least somewhat expressive

When the kerberos mission fails, keith is destroyed. all his grades almost instantly drop and he barely shows up to class because losing the only person he trusts essentially makes him totally apathetic, and go back to having alot of paranoid thoughts/delusions (mostly surrounding the garrison staging the entire thing, sort of fake moon landing style but with actual murder to make people back off on exploring space because of Something), and feeling like he’s being stalked by people (not entirely untrue tbh), and deal with anhedonia. and thats how he gets kicked out/how he drops out

Living entirely alone (as in without any supervision) was hell for Keith.

Moving to the shack after dropping out messed with his entire routine, and without a relatively strict routine, he ends up forgetting his meds

Off medication, he had really really really horrible episodes that almost always ended with him getting hurt in some way

Off-meds, he starts his garrison/shiro conspiracy wall

He also found the blue lions cave during an episode

After a while (keith never tries to find out how much time he spent without his meds because he forgot about them), he ends up taking his antipsychotics again, and almost destroys the wall, except theres a feeling he still has that he rememebers he had during an episode.

He ends up going to the cave again, and “Holy shit that was real??” so he restarts his wall while being a bit more down to Earth.

The day shiro crashes on earth is one of the best days of his life bc, well, shiro, but also because he was actually right for once.

Overall, Keith’s pretty good at organising his thoughts and not speaking incoherently, but if hes at all stressed, hell go through a lot of thought blocking

It’s really annoying because Keith hates not being understood and not finishing his points, but often, even if the person hes talking to reminds him what he was talking about, he cant remember what he was going to say after

He also used to think that the thought blocking was aliens and/or the government stealing away all his thoughts to study humans (or, before the garrison: not entirely human entities)

His thoughts are alot more disorganised than his speech shows (under normal circumstances, there are occasions where he does get mostly incoherent). He’s learned to think of what hes going to say step by step before saying it

What he says often still comes off as not entirely thought out, rude, etc because thinking about what order words are going to come out of his mouth doesnt fix not understanding how to interact with others

And here’s a bunch of stuff i couldn’t really make long enough to warrant a separate section:

Keith stims mostly when hes nervous or bored, and he stims by scratching his nails against things, because he likes the sounds it makes.

[self harm (sort of)] at some point, the team notices that when theres nothing for him to scratch (like a wall or something), hell scratch at his own skin, because scratching fabric feels/sounds horrible, often until he scratches part of it off. so they make him these little squares of material to scratch at

Keith does a lot of magical thinking (i cant find an easy link for this but in this case its like seeing signs in things that are seemingly unrelated if that makes sense) where he’ll see a ‘sign’ and feel like he has to do something (what something is varies from something very specific to just “something”)

since he obviously cant always do what hes supposed to do after seeing the signs, hes started writing down everything so he can do it later (lance’s idea). it helps a lot.

Keith hates places with background noises that arent constant (like they stop and start, stop and start), even if they arent particularly loud, because he loses his entire train of thought whenever it stops or starts

Ok! that’s all I can think of right now, I hope this answered what you were looking for!

I lost my entire train of thought at least 5 times while typing this so I’ll probably add more things in my tag later on when I think of them again!

I’m also writing an actual story with this, it should come out around the end of June if you’re interested!

#schizo keith #i did not reread this im sorry if parts are incoherent #keith #voltron #vld #Anonymous

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seventeenbiscuits · 7 years

Text

Midsummer Night (Vernon Imagine)

Word count: 1146

A/N: I went a little bit over on this... but only the best for Vernon Hansol Chwe!

The clacking of the keyboard as you worked on your assignment was the only sound in the stuffy room. At 3 am, there was no other noise. All was still. Except for you and your brain.

Why did I get such a crappy partner for this assignment?

You glared at your phone screen, with 15 recent calls to your group partner, who was supposed to be writing this other part of the project.

All because of him, I’m struggling now.

Your hands moved in a daze as your brain struggled to keep up with your hands, which seemed to be spitting out words which made no sense. Every other house in the street was dark except for your window, lit up by the dim and crappy lighting of your room.

You stopped to take a break and stretch out. Cracking your knuckles with a sickening sound, you stood up and looked outside. You could feel the warm air of the summer through the flyscreen and sighed.

“I could sure use some coffee right now…” you mumbled, yawning while rubbing your eyes blearily. “I might as well go and get some downstairs.”

As you practically fell down the stairs, your phone buzzed with a message.

[0524 804 938] “I’m really sorry Y/N”

[0524 804 938] “I swear I’ll make it up to you”

[0524 804 938] “Please don’t be mad at me”

[0524 804 938] “Do you need anything? I’ll run down and get stuff for you…”

You really couldn’t be bothered with a reply. This was getting more and more ridiculous. He wasn’t sorry at all. And no way were you going to give in to his tempting deal. You were going to show that pathetic boy that you could do this yourself.

“I’m too tired to feel emotion,” you whined, as you opened all the cupboards searching for your stash of instant coffee. The moonlight glittered through the blinds and drew lines across your face as you dragged yourself around the kitchen trying to find the miracle liquid to revive you. When you spotted the blue plastic bag, you grinned, even sleepier and slapped your hand on it only to find-

No more coffee.

You collapsed in a heap, feeling so old. Someone must have taken the rest of the coffee. Suddenly failing this project didn’t seem so bad after all.

“I could just go to sleep right now… and leave that assignment…and fail…” you pouted, as you shuffled back to the stairs in your shorts and a baggy t-shirt. Planting one foot on the staircase, you looked back at the kitchen wearily.

“Or I could go out and walk to the coffee shop… its only 2 streets away and it's not like anyone would be up to come and kidnap me or something…”

Sighing heavily, you cursed your conscience as you unlocked the door and stumbled out into the sticky summer night.

Yanking open the door of the 24/7 coffee shop with more strength than was necessary, you were pretty sure that anyone who saw you right now would scream in fright.

I must be a mess, you mused. My hair is all messy and I’m in the most unflattering clothes ever.

The barista behind the counter woke from her trance with a start and smiled awkwardly at you. You attempted a smile in return, but right now your coffee craving was too much to handle. Ignoring the one other person in the shop, you stumbled to the counter and ordered some random espresso before slumping over to the nearest seat and putting your head down on the table.

The other customer in the shop caught your eye. He did not seem like the type of person to be at a coffee shop in the weak early morning hours of a midsummer day. HIs shirt was too fine pressed, too neat to be sitting here like you.

The elderly man did not seem to be needing coffee, but he seemed a little lost. He was mumbling incoherently to himself, occasionally gesturing in the air.

You wondered if you should go over and try to talk with him, or at least sit with him for a while. You slid out of your seat, the sticky plastic clinging to your thighs and plopped down next to the old man.

“Excuse me, sir, do you need any help?” you asked, hoping that he could hear you.

The elderly man smiled at you and answered haltingly, “Ah, hello there. I’m fine, I just don’t know why I’m here.”

You blinked a couple times, trying to make sense of his words. “Do you have any family members I can contact to help you?” you offered.

“I have my grandson. He’s a fine boy. I bet he’ll come really soon to find me. He’s very dependable and he makes good jokes,” he rambled.

I should wait with him until his grandson comes, you thought. Turning to the old man, you tried to start a conversation while sipping your espresso.

Just at that moment, the coffee shop bell rang and you turned your head towards a handsome boy, who looked around your age, rushing in and clasping the old man’s hand.

“Grandfather! Why did you leave the house like that? Mum got so freaked and everyone is looking for you! They even woke up Sofia to go search around the neighbourhood,” the boy blurted.

The grandfather just chuckled and apologised as the boy shook his head in worry.

This must be the grandson that the old man was talking about. He is one fine boy, though.

The boy turned to look at you, and you smiled at him. The old man looked at you and told his grandson,”See! This is the kind girl who stayed with me until you came!”

You felt a blush creeping up your cheeks as the fine boy beamed at you in admiration. Suddenly you felt embarrassed in your ugly clothes. There was something interesting about him. He seemed cool and reserved but seeing the care and worry he had for his grandfather warmed your heart.

“Thank you for staying with my grandfather,” he said, extending his hand. “I’m Vernon.”

“Nice to meet you, Vernon. I’m Y/N,” you grinned, shaking his hand. “And that’s completely fine, it was no big deal.”

After checking your watch, you hurriedly excused yourself as you really needed to get to work on that project. A car pulled up outside the shop and a couple whom you presumed was Vernon’s parents dashed into the shop and helped the old man get into the car. But before you could leave, Vernon called you.

“Y/N! It's too late for you to be walking home…” the boy blushed as he spoke. “And my parents have already picked up Grandpa. Is it okay if I…”

You smiled encouragingly at him.

“Of course you can.”

Thanks for reading!

#seventeen #seventeen imagine #seventeen vernon #vernon chwe #vernon #vernon hansol chwe #hansol #coffee shop au

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kjwongsbrain · 7 years

Text

Contains 900% less screaming.

I've not done a movie review in a while. It's not that I haven't seen many movies lately, quite the opposite in fact, but I've not been properly motivated to write a review about any of them. It's not that those movies have been particularly bad ones either, quite the opposite again. I've been watching some really good movies from my to-watch list and since that list is very properly curated, the experience is usually a positive one.

No, the process of writing a review on this blog is often driven by the purpose of writing one. I'm not a film reviewer by any means. I'm just a person who enjoys movies. I enjoy every aspect of movies, not just the final product. I enjoy looking out for smart casting choices, great camera work, beatufiul music and sound production, and the likes. Films to me are a culmination of so many art disciplines that they are an incredibly dense single serving that explodes into a vareity of experiences and emotions.

But that's not the reason I write movie reviews and those of you who've read a selection of them will know that I have written lengthy (very lengthy. Shamelessly lengthy) reviews of things I enjoy and also things I didn't. But neither of those ocassions are done simply to praise or diss the film at hand. The real reason for writing them is to demonstrate just what makes a film something great and resonating on multiple levels, and also sometimes to demonstrate the exact opposite.

Some of my favourite movies to write about recently have been things like Arrival (not on this site, I wrote a short one on facebook) and Batman V Superman - one film I absolutely adore and am seriously considering putting it on my list ofgreatest movies in my lifetime (a list that is at the moment 3 films long), and the other I absolutely despise for just how many things it got wrong and how many things it doesn't understand about the comic-book movie universe we live in today..

And so I find myself now reveiwing something that has given me enough irk (sorry, it is going to be that kind of a review) that I am well motivated to write about it. There will be complaining, there will be self-entitled moaning, and all of it will not mean anything to the movie industry, but perhaps some of you might find it entertaining to read. Also the fact that I'm currently looking back at how little I've been writing and I'm starting to get annoyed at myself.

Remakes have long been part of Hollywood tradition. Remakes and reboots have been going even before color films were a thing. An example of this is Ben Hur, which has now been remade so many times it's only a matter of time before a intergalactic-space-podracing version of it is made next. Wait. It seems like this already exists. To dislike something for simply being a remake or a reboot is silly because even though some classic stories are classics for a reason, a touch of modernity or a recontextualizing of the premises can somethings offer a brand new experience even for those who are familiar with the story. Romeo and Juliet has probably been reimagined a million different times in a million different settings and at least a dozen of those have been decent. I think.

So I'm not going to bash Skull Islang for being a remake or a reboot or whatever the heck it's trying to be what with the DUCU (the Dark Universe Cinematic Universe, which is the name we will forever be using instead of 'monsterverse') and eventually a Godzilla VS Kong film. I am, however, going to put it side by side with the other Kong film that I have seen (because I am too lazy and uninterested in watching the 1933 one and the 1976? one), and that's the Peter Jackson one.

Boy, oh boy is this new one terrible. It's not like I am a super fan of the film Jackson made, but this turd makes that thing shine brighter than Gandalf the White.

I don't even know where to start with this thing. For one the writing is absolutely atrocious. The tone is so incoherrent and the interaction beetween characters so uninspired that even the charisma of one flaming hot superstar, Tom Hiddleston, couldn't save it. And I was just coming around to like Brie Larson but this is going to be a rather bad stain on her career trajectory. She's going to be Captain Marvel next and if the only other work people know her for is Room and Kong, well.... that doesn't look very good.

It's just idiotic dialogue that doesn't make any narrative sense that irks me so much. Sure there are a lot of character stereotypes that get mashed into filmls like these and most of the time it's not as bad as people think, but this one had the added bonus of also being tonally incoherent. There was an unpleasant whirlwind of serious and silly moments that no sentence or character in the film could be taken any bit seriously. There were snarky comments in dire moments, unnecessary idiotic lines dotted all over the place and characters that almost had no idea if they were to be taken seriously or made fun of. To watch John C Reilly flip from insane old man to serious wise man to out-of-touch caveman, all within a minute or so, is beyond ridiculous.

The plot is also a mismatch in so many departments. You have three different parties involved in this 'expedition' and at no point are the motivations of the characters ever clear or rational. I've talked before about movies that make it almost impossible to believe that any actions of its characters fall anywhere in the realm of rationality and how badly this hurts films. Even something as silly as Civil War creates a situation of conflict that is believable enough, and that's really stretching it, where you can buy into the premise of the film.

There's this one jarring moment in the film when the whole troupe of people suiddenly decide that they ought to follow Nick Fury to go hunt down the monkey and at no point in the movie were they ever required to follow him to certain death. Half of them aren't even soldiers and Hiddleston is a hired tracker who's on the island solely for the money. Shouldn't he be listening to his employer and not crazy army man with a grudge?

Brie Larson's unnecessary sarcasm was also very painfully written in. As were the half dozen throwaway jokes that didin't land because there wasn't any hint of this film being any sort of fun light hearted romp.

My favourite bit of the entire film is the red bandana soldier (I don't remember any of their names because they were all so irrelevant to the film) kept belting out something along the lines of "WHY IS NOBODY TALKING ABOUT HOW CRAZY ANY OF THIS IS?", and that's probably the crux of why this movie is so bad. Nothing in it makes any sense on any level and so I spent the majority of the movie laughing at it. Not laughing with it like a good comedy would do (by the way, I laughed a lot watching Adult Life Skills, a good movie for anyone interested in a lovely take on the whole 'thirty year old not growing up' type of story), but laughing at it for how stupid and silly the entire film was.

And then I went digging into wikipedia and found this statement - " Vogt-Roberts also wanted Kong to feel like a "lonely God, he was a morose figure, lumbering around this island," and took the design back to the 1933 incarnation, where Kong was presented as a "bipedal creature that walks in an upright position " And that to me is a shining example of how some directors justify their stupid decisions with this idiotic garbage and can't smell the scent of their own hubris infused farts. Kong in 1933 was a stop motion doll. Just because something is old and even if it was in the original, doesn't make it good. This is the whole 'member berry' thing that South Park spent an entire season talking about. It's a demonstration of how naive and immature a director can be when you see decisions like these being made and then the excuse that's given to justify it. That kind of explains the other slew of poor decisions made in the film when it came to the script, the style, the characters, the decision to play music while fixing their gear in the middle of a monster infested island, etc.

It reminds me of Jurassic World in the way that both these films clearly haven't got a clue what makes their predecessors such giants in the film industry. Films like these simply try to create moments and link them together with idiotic dialogue and unnecessary sequences rather than creating a proper narrative weight and emotional resonance. And then go on to make tons of money.

And then there is of course the entire arc of Kong that makes him such a great character to begin with. The essence of Kong as a character was really brought to a perfect cadence in the original plot's third act where Kong is captured and brought to the city. He dies, succumbing to the world of the modern man. That provides a gorgeous contrast to his dominance on his own little island. There have been reviews that have talked about this in greater length, and I agree with all of them. Without the tragic third act, this new Kong movie is simply a big beastie with no motivation and no personality. He's just smashing stuff. Sure they try to shoe in the whole 'protector of the island' thing, but unless it's framed in the cadence of his tragic end, none of it really means anything.

Kong was always a tragedy. The original 1933 film was billed as a horror movie and in many ways it was, but it will always remain as a tragic story and that's where the true personality of this character shines.

And so we have to do the dirty business of comparing Peter Jackson's King Kong with this one and in so many ways Peter Jackson made a far superior movie. One of my favourite scenes in Jackson's movie is the part that they encounter the giant slugs and insects. Jackson's choice of silencing the music in this sequence allows the viewer to feel the hopelessness of the situation for all the characters as they realise the circumstances they have brought upon themselves. But even the action sequences of Jackson's film are so much better. The legendary fight with the dinosaurs was a far better sequence than 100 foot Kong against 'The Big One'.

On a side note, I find that throwing one helicopter and hitting another when you're the size of this new king kong is like us throwing a stone and hitting another stone in mid air. You go try it. Not only is Kong a bit monkey, apparently he's a Major League pitcher as well. Unlike in the original and in Jackson's film you get to see Kong swat furiously and mostly unsuccessfully at flying airplanes, this King Kong can pluck a moving helicopter out of thin air and then chuck it at another moving one with destructive accuracy. No, Mr Vogt Roberts, this does not make the scene cool. That's like schoolboy Michael Bay levels of cool. Which is another way of saying 'idiotic'.

While we're on the topic of idiotic sequences, there's a sequence where lady photographer hears the sound of an animal stuck under one of the crashed helicopters and decides to help it and then SURPRISE! Kong shows up and plucks the helicopter off the ground. And I'm supposed to believe that a giant 100 foot monkey somehow snuck up on this lady and she didn't notice it coming at all. It's a normal idea for there to be a 'sudden' reveal or encounter between character and monster - it's one of the reasons the Alien movies do so well - but when it's a 100 foot ape, there's just no way it immediately looks ridiculous.

I've mentioned that I'm not exactly a big fan of Jackson's remake, but he's done so many things better than this one and you can tell it was a passion project for Jackson and even though he was granted a big enough budget after the success of the Lord of the Rings movies, he was faithful and true to not just the story, but Kong as a character as well.

This new movie is throws all of that in the bin and it feels exactly the way it was intended - as a necessary remake to set up the big fight between monkey and lizard. That makes sense that Kong's character is no longer important, his tragic arc no longer the definition of who he is, and the most important element of the screaming lady completely banished from the script. Say what you want about how we need more strong female leads instead of the helpless damsel in distress but I have a lot of respect for both Fay Wray and Naomi Watts for bringing the scream to life in their respective films. I rewatched Jackson's movie maybe a year ago and every scream Watts did was absolutely impressive. You go try it. You go try screaming like that and conveying the reall feeling of fear and helplessness in the hands of a CGI giant ape. That's some amazing work right there.

And without the final cadence in this new Kong movie, the whole movie is in fact unconsequential. None of what has occurred in this film actually matters. Kong did not grow as a character. All the humans suffer from Transformers level of inconsequence (they killed of poor Toby Kebbell without any rhyme or reason). And the fact that this film has actually recieved generally favourable treatment from the critics and the public means that we're going to invite more of these kinds of movies into our lives and also that Mr Vogt-Roberts will go down the path of many directors who've made stupid decisions and then get handed big franchises. I'm lloking at you Niel Blomkamp, you sci-fi traitor. This young chap is about to take on Metal Gear Solid next so it is likely that the ridicule of video game movies will continue. Even Duncan Jones couldn't save it with his Warcraft movie that was actually good and nobody liked.

So you can probably tell that I'm not invested in the DUCU at all at monkey business hasn't convinced me otherwise. In fact it's convinced me that this is an altogether terrible idea and it's going to add to the pain of already having to deal with franchises that refuse to die like Transformers and The Fast and the Furious. Now we add to that a slew of monster movies that'll take on the 'successful' style and tone of this ape caper.

Sigh.

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