#so any time she thinks of her mother its more sadness than anger | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

astraystayyh · 3 months

Text

The snow falls, we fall apart.

summary: when heartbreak looms on your life, and winter becomes a time you loathe, hyunjin helps you rewrite your memories with the season, and with it, everything you once believed about love.

genre: producer student!hyunjin x reader. roommates!au. friends to lovers. acute descriptions of heartbreak and general sadness. slow burn. hurt/comfort. healing and hopeless romantic hyune. very inspired by long for you so lots of pining and yearning. (wc: 13k)

warnings: mentions of alcohol. it is implied that reader was in an a very toxic relationship but no details are shared.

a.n: happy birthday to my hyunjin, my muse, my light. thank you for being so full of love that it made me love love again in return. this is i think my most personal piece, and i hope it reminds those who need it that love should be soft and kind, that it shouldn’t hurt, that it should heal not break. i love you guys and i love you my xi, writing this collab with you has been a true honor <3 also!! please listen to long for you while reading :,)

winter falls masterlist.

You’ve only ever felt utter despair twice in your life.

First, when you were seven years old, playing hide and seek with your cousins at your grandma’s house. It was a warm summer afternoon, the air sweetened by pastries you devoured hours ago. You decided to hide in a wooden cabinet up in the attic, only to end up stuck there. The walls felt like they were closing in on you, the oxygen seeping away from the cracks underneath the door, leaving you deprived of air, of life.

Second, at twelve, when you've come to discover sorrow's new facet, clad in grief's heavy cloak. Your parents adopted a hamster for your birthday, but they did not know he had a terminal disease. You were distraught, to say the least, when you awoke to its still form, death claiming a frail heart unaware of its imminent fate.

And now, third, many many moons later, you are knocking on Hyunjin’s door a few minutes after midnight. It is cold out, tears tracing rivulets on your cheeks, your fingers tinted pink from roaming outside in the harsh winds, your heart much heavier than when you were a child. More grief-stricken, at your own hands, this time.

A disheveled Hyunjin opens the door, his blonde ash hair tousled and sticking upwards, a clear indication of the many times he had run his hands through it in fits of frustration. His gray hoodie zipped up hastily, revealing the silver cross necklace he was wearing, nestling perfectly against his honeyed skin.

You've always had an aversion to seeking comfort, saw it as revealing your deepest vulnerabilities to a world that isn't always kind. It was easier, much simpler to do so when you were a clueless child— when you sank in your cousin Lia's hold as she attempted to steady your breathing, when your mother cradled you in her lap after Pinky died.

It is much harder now, much more embarrassing because Hyunjin has never seen you this sad, never glimpsed your shadows that now swarm his doorstep, unannounced.

“What's wrong?” he quickly asks, eyes darting over your figure in a rapid search for visible wounds. He wouldn’t find any. All your injuries stem from within— blood doesn’t have to be spilled for your heart to weep.

You had rehearsed a lie as you walked up to his doorstep. You would say that your car broke down near his place and ask if you could stay over for the night. He would insist he could drive you to your place and you’d refuse, saying that it was too late and you did not wish to bother him. You’d sleep on the couch and slip away in the early hours of the morning.

Yet, it is the genuine worry etched in his eyes that dismantles the fortress you've hidden in, melts the lie in your throat, morphing it into a steel lump coiling in your throat. He looks concerned when all you’ve had directed towards you recently was anger. And you missed someone looking at you in care, not reproach.

“I didn’t know where else to go.” You admit, your voice shattered, fragments of your vocal cords scattered out in the wind like a broken mosaic, the sound of it scraping against your ears.

Blow one hurt. It felt like your body turned against you as it deprived you of oxygen. The sobs that escaped you once you perceived the light pained you, perhaps more than being confined in the darkness.

Blow two was even worse, it was your first time experiencing grief. It was too hard of a concept for your innocent heart to grasp, too complicated for you to find solace in anything as adults do.

You promised yourself that you’d reserve blow three for monumental agonies— big pains and big sorrows only. That’s how you managed to keep all your tears at bay for most of your life. Would they be worth losing your third sob for? No, you've always found the answer to be.

And in all the twisted scenarios you’ve conjured up in your mind, deaths and illnesses and the haunting tale of failure, you did not imagine that it would happen on Hwang Hyunjin’s doorstep. That you’d burst into sobs at the compassionate look in his gaze, and the sad smile he sent your way. As if he knew, as everyone did around you. That you had handed a knife to a serial killer and it was only a matter of time before he stabbed you in the heart.

Two weeks ago.

“I’m trying to understand you but you aren’t helping me,” Seungmin is frustrated as he paces relentlessly before you from left to right like a swinging pendulum. You sit on the couch, beholding only his shoes, avoiding his gaze that would reflect the truth you dare not confront.

“He’s sucking the life out of you, can’t you see that?”

You can, out of everyone that surrounds you, you can see it the most. You feel as if you are carrying a skin that isn’t your own, weighed down by a relationship that has taken everything from you. But admitting it is admitting that you were wrong, in trusting him, in loving him. You couldn’t bear it.

“We are fine!” you shout back, the defiance in your voice surprises even you. This is a familiar script with Seungmin, a recurring conversation spurred by your puffy eyes and diminishing appetite. He tells you, begs you to leave, but where could you go? How could you leave a home where you've shed all your treasured belongings at the door— your skin, your bones, your very self.

What place would welcome you now that you're stripped bare of your soul?

“When was the last time he made you smile, huh? All he does is hurt you, and you...” he chuckles incredulously, running his hand through his hair. “You are letting him.”

Deny, deny, deny.

“This isn’t true. He loves me,” the words taste foreign in your mouth like rusty metal dragging across your lips. A small voice whispers that love shouldn't feel like this, but you quiet it down.

“Are you hearing yourself? Yn, I…” he kneels before you, his hands resting comfortingly on your knees. This is Seungmin, your best friend of five years. You know he has your best interests at heart, you are even more sure of it when his voice softens, shakes slightly when he utters your name. “Yn, please. I’m trying to help you. Please.”

“I didn’t ask for your help,” you push away his hands, standing up. “I don’t want your help, and I don’t need it.”

You quickly leave Seungmin’s dorm, your heart heavier than when you entered it, foolishly hoping that he'd ignore your distressed state after yet another fight with your boyfriend. But Seungmin doesn't understand, no one around you does— you’ve gambled your heart, and you cannot stop drawing the cards, even in the face of losing strikes.

❁ ❁ ❁

Hyunjin offers you a cup of tea with a gentle smile and you grab the steaming drink from his hands. The smell of chamomile wraps around your senses, and your brain fizzles out for a second before the soothing aroma. But it is a fleeting respite, the tempest of your thoughts crashes back onto you with an unsettling force, causing you to almost drop the drink as your hands shake. You place it down the table without taking a sip.

“I’m sorry for coming unannounced,” you apologize, wincing at the intrusion, “I hope I didn’t wake you up.”

“I always sleep late. Don’t worry about it,” he smiles, but you know it isn’t a genuine grin, because his eyes betray an unsubdued concern, refusing to morph into their usual moon crescents.

You’ve always thought that Hyunjin wears his emotions openly— when he laughed, he did so loudly, his boisterous giggles traveling around Seungmin’s dorm. When he hurt himself, everyone in the vicinity would know so from his loud yelps. And when something worried him, he would bite his lip, toying with the plush flesh to ease his nerves.

As he is doing now. Looking at you.

“We broke up,” you quickly say, and your words hang over you like a gloomy cloud. “But I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Do you want me to fight him? I’ll bring changbin too,” he suggests a serious tone underlying his playful offer, and it manages to tear a reluctant giggle out of you.

“Changbin doesn’t know me well enough to fight for me,” you counteract and he shakes his head. “He’ll fight for me, I'm his princess.”

“Are you now?” The giggle escapes your mouth less forcefully, and the smile that graces Hyunjin’s face is a genuine one.

“I am. My proposal stands,” he extends his hand and you wrap your fingers around his palm. “Thank you, I’ll keep it in mind,” you smile but he frowns, flipping your hand around in his hold.

“You are freezing,” he whispers, using his other palm to rub warmth into yours.

“It’s fine,” you lie, slipping your hand out of his grasp, not feeling deserving of his kindness.

Wordlessly, Hyunjin stands, walking into what you assume is his bedroom. You only know of his place because you dropped off Seungmin here some time ago. You are too exhausted to even drink in the interior.

“Here,” he returns, handing you a navy hoodie of his and black joggers. “This will keep you warm at night.”

“Thank you,” you whisper, hesitating for a few seconds before speaking again. “Can you please not tell Seungmin, I... I can't face him right now.”

“Of course. I’ll be awake still if you do need something.”

Hyunjin’s clothing is warm, although peeling away your own garments felt like shedding layers of your skin, as if the fabric melted into your very flesh, just like memories from the day did. You have never felt this worthless before, discarded like a forgotten leaf on the roadside, one he stepped on for his own enjoyment, leaving you crushed in his wake, unable to fly away again.

Hyunjin’s rose perfume wraps around you, and you find relief in sleeping somewhere where your, his, scent was no longer around. You foolishly hope that if you close your eyes hard enough, you’ll manage to convince yourself that you’re someone else, tonight. Someone who isn’t tethered to the heartache, someone who can slip away from the clutches of a love that hurts more than hate could ever manage to do.

❁ ❁ ❁

Heartbreak isn’t beautiful, no matter how eloquently you try to dress it in the syllables of poetry, no words can soften the burn in your lungs, the searing ache that courses through your very core, reminding you that deep within, down to the fundamentals of your being and the most basic alchemy that ties your atoms together— you are unlovable. Whether you cut your hair or allow it to grow, change your heart, or leave it as it has always been, you will remain so.

You don’t remember much of the past week, blurry fragments here and there that float in your mind like a distorted water reflection. There is little room for memories when you are busy trying to remember how to breathe— one inhale in, one exhale out. The simple concept seems harder when there are unkind hands permanently lodged into your heart, squeezing it tight.

What you do remember is telling Seungmin through text the next day, because you couldn’t bear the way his eyes would soften if you spoke to him in person. No signs of surprise cast on his figure, because he knew that it was long coming, a train with one final inevitable destination— you in shambles, him okay.

You remember Seungmin cradling you in his arms when he came to see you, and you trying desperately to keep the tears at bay— too focused on pinching your arm to let Seungmin’s warmth radiate through your being, Hyunjin lingering uncomfortably by the entrance of his living room.

You remember begging Seungmin to grab your belongings from the apartment you shared with your ex because you were unable to face him, him, and everything that your old place spelled out for you. Stand in the ruins of what you once thought would be your permanent home.

And now, you watch as Seungmin and Hyunjin bring suitcases full of your stuff into the latter’s place. And you feel like an outsider in your own body, standing at the corner of the room gazing at utter destruction, unable to stop it, unable to mend it. Seungmin quickly reassures you that you could crash in his and Minho’s place until you find a new one to live in, already taking out his laptop to search for new apartments for you.

But you did not care for it, your eyes zeroed in on the satin shirt peeking out of your suitcase. The one he bought you on your first month anniversary. Back when love felt like a gentle feather running down your spine, and not a dull knife slicing away at your skin.

“This place's expensive too,” Seungmin sighs, rubbing his temple warily. Your logical best friend could not fix your heartbreak but he took it to heart to alleviate your other troubles. You would thank him for it, later, when your tongue finds enough will to move.

“What if you move in with me?” Hyunjin suddenly says and his words filtrate through the fog in your mind easily, as if he rehearsed them enough times so they’d roll out smoothly out of his mouth. “I mean, Felix is away for the next year since he went back to Australia. And I was looking for a new roommate anyway.” He shrugs and Seungmin turns to look at you, his eyes convey the question his mouth doesn’t articulate— is it okay with you?

“I don’t…” your voice is croaked, so you clear your throat. “I don’t want you to do things out of pity.”

“I’m not. If I was, I would've told you to move in with me for free. I still need you to pay rent,” he raises his eyebrows, a playful tease and you smile in relief, nodding, “Okay, I will. thank you.”

Heartbreak is ugly and all-encompassing, weaving through the roots of your heart and infecting each organ with its insidious touch. It renders you immobile, incapable of performing the simplest tasks, burdened by a weight unseen by the world. But you try your best, your very best to contain it.

You smile at the cashier as she hands back your money only to wonder if her soft, well-manicured hands would too crush a soul without remorse. You go to all your classes without fail but your mind is elsewhere, contemplating why the sun filtering through the windows no longer warms your skin. Can nerve endings perish when subjected to too much pain? What's left of life when you can no longer feel the caress of the sun?

You watch a movie at Seungmin's dorm but your mind is elsewhere, fleeting to this morning and how you refused to stay in the shower for more than three minutes because your thoughts might become haunting ghosts tempting you to follow them. You brush your hair and spray your perfume, only because you have to, because you live with Hyunjin and you wouldn’t want your sadness to taint him too. You wonder how long you’ll have to bear it. You wonder if it’ll ever leave you or if the veins in your heart have molded themselves after the pain and they wouldn’t know how to accept happiness anymore.

You greet Hyunjin as he walks past you, shaking your head when he asks you if you want to eat dinner with him, quickly retracting back into your room. You have ten unread messages and a pile of growing laundry you need to do, but all you can muster is to gaze at the empty walls, mirroring the void within you. Your mom told you to call her again and you don’t know how you’ll speak to her without bursting into a sob, how you’ll tell her that all it took was one person to break you. Or maybe it was two people, your hands and his tearing apart your flesh and bones. Maybe that’s the worst part about it. So you don’t call her.

And you only ever emerge from your room when you need to, just like now because your water bottle is finished and you need to refill it. You go to open the kitchen door when you hear Hyunjin’s muted shatter, Felix’s distinctive deep voice coming out of the phone speaker.

“Next you add the melted butter and stir it,” Felix instructs, the sounds of pots and utensils clinking in the background. You fidget slightly, mustering the strength to paint a fake smile on your lips.

“What next?”

“Sift the dry ingredients then add them to your wet mixture,” Felix explains, met with a few seconds of silence. You can almost visualize Hyunjin's perplexed expression, blinking rapidly in confusion.

“Explain it to me like I’m five years old,” he requests, prompting a small smile to etch itself onto your face.

“How are you surviving without me?”

“I’m not please come home,” Hyunjin sounds horrified as Felix’s rich chuckles fill the air. “Why do you suddenly want to make brownies anyway?” he then asks.

You go to open the door when Hyunjin’s response catches you off guard.

“They’re for Yn.”

Hyunjin's words resonate in the air, causing a hitch in your throat and Felix’s teasing whistles simultaneously, but Hyunjin is quick to stop him. “No, no, no, it’s not like that. They’re just a bit down and I remember them loving your brownies. So…”

It takes you a fleeting moment to dig the memory out of your mind, a year ago, right before your ex came to pick you up from Seungmin’s dorm. You had a bite of Felix’s brownies, a surprised gasp escaping your lips at its delicious taste, back when food had taste and happiness came easily to you. It was an insignificant memory, you did not imagine Hyunjin, out of everyone, would remember it.

But he did, and he’s now pacing before your closed door, contemplating how he’ll convince you to finally eat something with him. He throws a thumbs-up in the air for no one but himself, inhaling deeply before knocking on your door.

“Hey,” he greets with a hopeful smile, his gaze meeting your tired form. He hesitates for a second, clearing his throat. “Brownies?” You remain unmoving and he falters, “Hm? Please?”

“Sure,” you nod and a wave of relief floods through Hyunjin as you step out of your room. His joy is short-lived when he takes the brownies out of the oven, only to find them thoroughly burnt.

His mouth hangs agape, and he walks back shamefully to the oven, lowering its door only to scream inside of it.

“This will be more therapeutic,” you say, pointing nonchalantly to the fridge and he agrees, opening its doors and yelling once again in the much larger space.

Your melodic laughter fills the kitchen, Hyunjin’s embarrassment is suddenly a forgotten memory.

“I’m craving kimbap. Should we get it instead?” you propose, a touch shyly and he quickly agrees, afraid you’d change your mind and walk back to your room where he can no longer ensure you are okay.

Hyunjin absentmindedly dances along to the music blasting through the convenience store when a girl sidles up to his side, a saccharine grin on her lips as she looks up at him, “hi,” she greets and his tentative smile mirrors hers. “Hey.”

“Are you single?” she asks, her gaze briefly fleeting to the window. “I think you are really cute.”

“I’m…” he glances at you but you're suddenly engrossed in the ingredients of the tuna kimbap you are holding, pretending not to listen. “I am but I’m not interested, thank you.”

“Oh, come on,” she places a hand on his arm and he physically recoils. “Give me your insta and we could talk.”

“No,” he repeats, grabbing her hand to remove it when a loud voice startles him. “Baby, what’s taking you so— What are you doing?” Hyunjin watches in horror as the girl’s eyes grow wide, before she scrambles to the man’s side, feigning fear.

“He kept hitting on me when I said I had a boyfriend, baby.”

“What?” both you and Hyunjin gasped in comical unison. He would find it amusing if not for the escalating anger radiating from the man, who looks like he spends all his days in the gym. Hyunjin suddenly regrets not working out with Changbin.

The man strides towards Hyunjin. “Do you want to die?”

“No? there’s a misunderstanding,” he replies, swiftly standing before you and shielding you with his arm. “Your… baby,” he wiggles his finger in front of the man's face, “she was the one hitting on me!”

The man scoffs loudly, his face growing redder from the anger seething in him. “So you hit on my girlfriend and then accuse her of cheating?” His fist rises threateningly, prompting Hyunjin to step back, accidentally bumping into your chest.

“Wait, wait, wait! Let’s go talk outside, man to man,” Hyunjin pauses, his voice taking on a taunting edge, “unless you're too scared?” he smirks as he feels you pull at his shirt, whispering an incredulous- “What are you doing?” He shakes his head, grabbing your hand and leading you outside, throwing a sly wink at the man behind you now.

“Are you seriously going to fight him?” you ask, your gaze shifting towards the deranged couple who are about to step out of the grocery store. “No, of course not. I'm a lover, not a fighter.”

“You said you'd fight my ex,” you point out and his eyes soften surprisingly.

“You are an exception.” He looks back at the man, who's now walking towards you both. “But anyways, do you know how to run?” he asks and you frown, “who doesn’t know how to—” you pause as realization dawns on you. “No," you whisper furiously.

“Yes.”

“No,” you shake your head, horrified and he nods, eyes apologetic.

“Yes.” His fingers entwine with yours, he squeezes your hand once before he takes off running.

“Hwang fucking Hyunjin!” you shout and he looks back at you, a mischievous smile on his face. “I’m sorry Yn my face is too pretty to be beaten up.”

“He’s following us!” you yell, looking back horrified as the, even angrier, man runs after you.

“Well, run faster!”

“I’m wearing fucking slippers!” you curse and he giggles, tipping his head back, the wind slamming into you both, his hand never letting go of your own.

“Oh my god why is he still running!” you groan and Hyunjin picks up speed, moving you even closer to his sprinting figure

“I know, is it ever that serious?” he yells above his shoulder and you dig your nails into his palm.

“Shut up, this wouldn’t have happened if you weren’t so gorgeous.”

“So, you think I’m pretty too?” Hyunjin grins proudly and an incredulous laugh escapes your lips.

“Really? Is this what you’re getting out of this situation?”

“Silver linings, Yn, silver linings,” he shouts as you round a small alley, finally stopping to catch your breath. You both fall to the ground, heavy breaths escaping your chests.

“Holy shit, I’m not athletic at all,” he heaves, his eyes meeting yours. He expects to find anger lingering in your gaze but all he can grasp is your amused smile before you collapse into a fit of laughter, clapping loudly and clutching your stomach with your hand.

“Oh my god, I’m crying,” you laugh harder, wiping away at the tears falling from your eyes. Hyunjin’s weariness disappears in the blink of an eye— he did not realize how much he missed your smile until he glimpsed it again. And it is beautiful. Happiness looks beautiful on you.

“Idiot,” you hit his shoulder playfully, and his response is delayed for a few seconds, the warmth from your smile rendering him immobile.

“I’m sorry,” he chuckles, pulling you up. “Here, I’ll carry you home,” he squats slightly before you. “How impolite of me. How dare I make your majesty run.”

You shake your head, amused, before climbing atop his back, his warm palms holding your thighs securely. “Only because the slippers hurt my feet.”

You walk in silence for a while, your arms wound up around Hyunjin’s neck, the ghost of a smile still lingering on both your faces.

“They said it will snow tomorrow,” Hyunjin speaks suddenly and you stay silent for so long he starts to wonder if you even heard him.

“Mm? That’s nice,” your tone is melancholic, and he pauses at the peculiar sadness in it— as though you were trying to act nonchalant about something that has once meant the world to you.

“Don’t you like the snow?” he asks and your hold on his neck falters.

“I loved it. Loved ice skating and building snowmen.” Your voice is light and airy, like Hyunjin’s favorite mint chocolate ice cream. “But now it reminds me of bad times, bad memories.”

“I understand.”

Hyunjin knows what it feels like to relinquish parts of yourself you never wished to part from. For someone to grab your happiest places and to cast a gloomy filter atop them. Sometimes it is the loss of a season that hurts more than the departure of a person.

And Hyunjin loves winter.

He’ll do everything so that you’ll come to love it again too.

❁ ❁ ❁

Is it a nightmare if the person in it is one you once loved, looked forward to beholding with your gaze, hoping they’d never slip out of your reach? You don’t know, but you are growing tired of having the same dreams every night. Of waking up with an exhaustion that goes beyond your restless sleep but pleads from your soul to rest after almost a year of torment.

You sigh wearily, rubbing a hand through your face before walking to the kitchen to retrieve a glass of water. You find Hyunjin there, eating a cupcake while standing shirtless, scrolling through his phone. You blink at the sight.

“Hey,” you clear your throat and he startles, dropping the cupcake on the ground. He goes to pick it up only to bang his head on the table, a loud yelp escaping his lips. You barely contain your giggles as you walk to his side, rubbing your palm soothingly on his head. “I'm sorry I didn't mean to scare you.”

“At least pretend you are sorry,” he mumbles, pointing to your amused smile and you chuckle, taking his hand and helping him to his feet.

“What are you doing up now?” he asks as he grabs some napkins to clean up the pink frosting smeared across the floor.

You hesitate for a few seconds before whispering, “Just nightmares. And you?” you quickly add, not keen on pushing the subject any further.

“I'm working on a song,” he explains, as his gaze lingers on your sunken eyes, weighed down by dark circles from too many sleepless nights.

“And the cupcake?”

“Some people need caffeine to function. I need flour.”

“I literally see you drink three americanos per day.”

“Okay well maybe I need both,” he admits sheepishly and you grin, drumming your fingers along the countertop.

“Can I sit with you while you work?” you ask quickly, before the words linger enough in your mouth that you no longer wish to spit them out.

The smile that Hyunjin sends you is kind, pushing the shadows of your nightmares just slightly out of reach.

“Of course, yeah you can. Don’t even need to ask.”

Hyunjin walks first into his bedroom, quickly slipping on a hoodie while you take in the interior. It is a quite simple room— a large bed with gray covers, and a desk filled with what you assume to be his producing equipment sits adjacent. But what catches your attention is the dried rose hung delicately on the wall, and the array of paintings surrounding it. You edge closer to it, drawn to the well-crafted paintings— a sun-drenched beach, a couple lost in an embrace so intimate their forms can no longer be separated, and an elderly pair riding a motorcycle, their love radiating vibrantly as if enclosed in eternal youth.

“You paint?” you ask, turning around to find Hyunjin watching you. He steps closer, enveloping you once more in the fragrance of his rose perfume.

“In my free time.”

“You are amazing, Hyunjin,” you compliment sincerely, your gaze fixed on that imagery of the old couple, one that most likely grew together. It tugs at your heartstrings, stirs a painful longing within you, a memory of a time when you too believed you’d find such boundless love.

“Thank you,” he murmurs, before brushing his fingertips gently against your forearm, for a fleeting second. “Are you okay?” he asks, a tenderness you’ve been aching for latched into his question. Your eyes refuse to peel away from the paintings and the love spilling from each paint brush stroke, a love that refuses to rest on your being as if you were harboring an armor that repels it.

“No,” you reply sincerely, turning to face him. “It’s really hard,” you say with a smile, hoping that the mechanical display of happiness would keep your tears at bay, tricking your brain into believing you're not as sad as you feel.

It fails to do so, and the tears well in your eyes like a gathering storm. Frustration twists your features as you shut your eyes, tilting your head upward in a desperate attempt to contain the flood. It pauses as Hyunjin cradles the back of your head, drawing you close to the warmth of his neck. His palm glides soothingly along your spine, before patting your back ever so gently.

Your back stiffens, hands curling into tight fists, breath catching in your throat. You've grown accustomed to pushing away comfort, putting up tall barriers to shield yourself. But tonight, Hyunjin seems to break through your defenses.

Tonight, you soften, fingers curling into the fabric of his shirt, head nestling deeper against his tender skin.

“It wasn’t your fault,” he whispers and another sob wracks through you, but he only holds you tighter. “It’ll get better soon.”

“I loved him,” you hiccup, your voice breaks, “a lot.”

“I know, that’s why it hurts.” His voice is gentle, and yet his hold on you feels secure as if you could stumble and fall, and he would be there to catch you

“I want it to stop hurting.”

“It will, with time.”

Your next words are tinged with a childlike vulnerability, reminiscent of blow one, then two. But you do not care for it, in that instant, you crave the reassurance, you need someone to plant a seed of hope in your soul because your hands are too frail to dig for it.

“Do you promise me?”

His response doesn’t come hastily, carelessly thrown into the air like idle chatters. He takes his time, considering it with the gravity of an oath.

“I promise you.” He finally says, each syllable infused with sincerity. A brief pause hangs in the air before he adds. “And if it doesn’t then you can hit me.”

“On your pretty face?” you ask, a smile tugging at your lips despite yourself.

“On my pretty face,” he confirms with a chuckle.

“What an honor,” you roll your eyes playfully as you lean back and he grins, tenderly wiping away your tears with the back of his fingers.

“I can't believe it took three minutes for you to cry in my room. This isn’t good for my reputation.”

“Good thing this will never leave this bedroom, right?” you point a finger at him threateningly, and he pretends to zip his lips, tossing away the imaginary key. “You got it.”

“So what are you working on?” you ask as you settle on the edge of his bed, knees drawn up to your chest.

“It’s a pretty sad song, wanna hear?” he offers, sitting across from you on his chair.

“Yeah, I'd love to,” you smile, and Hyunjin deftly adjusts a few buttons, before his melancholic whistles weave through the air, coupled with the somber melody of a piano. Your breath catches in your throat, the music reaching into the very depths of your soul. It's as if the notes are calling out for a loved one, for a time that has long passed, for a past that will never come back no matter how much we long for it.

The instrumental continues, each piano note and each violin string echo like a bittersweet lament, springing tears to your eyes. But the melody remains beautiful, akin to the beauty always found in the sadness— in the tears that cascade down your cheeks like glistening crystals, in the tremble of your hands akin to branches swaying in the wind, in the rise and fall of your chest with each breath, mirroring the ebb and flow of the waves.

Hyunjin watches you intently as the music envelops you both, his gaze softening with each passing moment. You bring a hand to your chest, almost unconsciously, too engrossed in the melody to even blink. He feels a blush sprout on his cheeks as your teary eyes hold his with the last fading guitar strings.

“You keep on making me cry,” you whisper, your voice choked with emotion, and he grins, tilting his head shyly against his shoulder.

“You like it?” he asks, a tad eager and you nod, not bothering to wipe the lone tears that are falling down your cheeks.

“I think this is what my loneliness sounds like,” you confess softly.

“As do mine.”

A silent beat runs between you both, it isn’t uncomfortable, but safe. Because you understand him, just as he understands you.

“Sometimes I long for things that have passed," he admits, “although I know I can't get them anymore.”

“The most terrible thing you can long for is yourself.”

“Because no one’s to blame for that loss but you?” he muses and you nod, a sad smile tugging at your lips. “Yeah, exactly.”

You bite your lip, casting a glance back at the paintings adorning the wall. “I don't love him anymore,” you begin quietly. “I stopped a long time ago because there was no room for love anymore to grow amid weeds and thorns.”

He remains silent, sensing that this is a weight you need to unburden yourself from.

“But in the midst of it I think I stopped loving myself too,” you whisper, a confession too terrible to be uttered out loud. “That's what I long for. The things I used to love that I'm indifferent to now.”

“Like you’re a stranger before everything once familiar to you.”

“Yeah, you express it prettily,” you remark with a small smile.

“It's my job,” he grins lightly.

“I think when your heart is pure,” he begins after a while, pausing to carefully choose the words that will soothe your burn, help sleep come more easily to you. “You give love to others more readily than you do to yourself. And it takes time, patience, to redirect that love back to your own heart once again. But it's not a mistake to love, you shouldn’t hate yourself for it. Nor should you blame your past self for loving the wrong person because they did not know what you now do.”

“Think of it as a caterpillar in their cocoon,” he continues gently, “when they finally emerge from their chrysalis, they might long for who they were, where they once were because it is the only place they've ever known. But they do not realize that they've transformed into a beautiful butterfly, that they can now fly, and witness much more than their chrysalis. So maybe, your new self will love the same things as before, or maybe you’ll find new, better things to love that you would have not known before. But in either way, your heart is beautiful. That is what matters, no?”

A small pout draws on your lips, your eyebrows scrunched as you gaze at him.

“You have a very tender soul, Hyunjin.”

Your words linger in Hyunjin's mind long after the sunrise, as you lay peacefully asleep on his bed. The melody of the instrumental he produced continues to play faintly in the background, serving as a gentle lullaby that eases you into slumber, entwined in his sheets, your arms wrapped protectively around yourself, one hand cradling your shoulders and the other resting gently on your stomach. The image sears into his eyes as he sketches the outlines of a figure holding itself absentmindedly, long into the night.

Hyunjin has had his fair share of compliments, mostly pertaining to his face, and others to his craft. but it is you who seems to have sensed that a part of his soul resided in his art, that he left pieces of his heart hidden in the notes he composes and the lyrics he writes, hoping they’ll find soft hands that will take care of them, just like your own.

Five days later.

hyunjin [11:34 p.m.]: are you home?

yn [11:34 p.m.]: yeahh, do you need anything?

hyunjin [11:35 p.m.]: come downstairs, im waiting for youu

if you say no i’ll freeze to death..

hurry i can’t feel my fingers anymore (please please) ㅠㅠㅠ

“This better be a life and death situation Hwang Hyunjin,” you say threateningly as soon as you appear before Hyunjin, causing him to straighten up from the wall he was leaning against.

“It is a very dangerous life-altering situation that requires your immediate assistance, indeed,” he responds solemnly, ushering you gently to his car and opening the door for you.

“Which is?” you ask as soon as he settles inside the car and he simply grins at you, his left dimple coming forth like the very sun on a gloomy day.

“You’ll see.”

Hyunjin’s eyes fleet to your figure every now and then, but you do not seem to notice, your gaze lost into the blurring lights ahead. He can tell you're still not entirely yourself, so he was prepared to forcibly drag you along with him. He’s almost surprised you accepted to come down so easily.

“Is that… Seungmin?” you speak suddenly, pointing to a man waving in the distance, as Hyunjin parks his car near an empty field.

“And Changbin? And Minho?” you continue, squinting your eyes, “and a bonfire?” you giggle with a hint of excitement.

“You love s’mores during the winter, right?”

Hyunjin smiles, your soul softens.

“I do,” you say quietly, “I really do.”

You quickly exit the car, running into Seungmin's arms with a grin of disbelief plastered on your face. “This is insane,” you almost shout, squeezing him tight in a hug.

“It was so hard to find the perfect middle of nowhere for this,” Minho grumbles as you move to greet him, but the warmth of his embrace assures you he's only teasing.

“Thank you,” you say with a smile as you hug Changbin, who affectionately ruffles your hair. “It was Hyunjin’s idea,” he reveals, and you glance back at Hyunjin, who stands with his hands buried deep within his sweatpants behind you. You mouth a silent “thank you” to him, but he shakes his head modestly as if it is nothing to bring happiness to a bruised heart.

The night unfolds in endless laughter, with Minho and Hyunjin taking turns roasting marshmallows over the crackling bonfire, and Seungmin serving you hot coffee to keep your hands warm. Your stomach aches from the uncontrollable fits of giggles that overtook your being as Minho recounts the time he danced so vigorously on stage for his dance club that he ripped his pants, feeling a breeze where there shouldn't be one; and Changbin tells you the story of the time his voice cracked in the middle of a rap battle, and how none of the boys stopped teasing him about it for months to come.

And as the four of them take turns making you laugh, a quiet, tender realization dawns on you—you are loved. It is something he tried to convince you was impossible, that no one around truly cared for you but him. And even then, you weren’t deserving of his love whole, only scrapes of it, as if you were a beggar tugging at the outskirts of his heart.

But Hyunjin reminded you otherwise. And if your friends found something worthy of love within you then perhaps so will you again, one day.

“Did you have fun?” Hyunjin asks as he opens the door to his, your, apartment hours later. What he doesn't expect is for you to respond by wrapping your arms around his slender torso, squeezing tight in gratitude.

“Thank you,” you whisper and he nods, though you cannot see him, returning the embrace by wrapping his arms around your shoulder blades.

Hyunjin doesn't let go first, sensing that perhaps you need this hug more than he does. He smiles as your eyes meet his again, but his grin falters when he notices your gaze flickering towards your bedroom, a hint of unease clouding your expression. It's as if behind that door lie monsters only you can grasp, wearing the faces of people you once knew, once loved.

“Wanna stay with me while I work on the song?”

“Last time I ended up sleeping on your bed,” you say a bit shamefully, recalling the morning you woke up to find yourself covered with a thick blanket that wasn’t there before, alone in Hyunjin's room.

“It's okay,” he shrugs, “I missed sleeping on the couch.”

You stare pointedly at him and he chuckles, “Fine, I did not miss it. But you needed the sleep, so it’s okay with me.”

“Fine,” you concede, though you did not need much convincing for it. “But only if you promise you’ll wake me up if I end up falling asleep again.”

Hyunjin tilts his head, thinking to himself for a few seconds before shaking his head stubbornly, a small pout drawn on his face, his eyes semi-closed. “No.”

“Hyunjin!”

“Nu-uh,” he insists, shaking his head once more as he walks back towards his room. “I'm waiting for you!”

“I'm not coming!”

But you do eventually join him, after changing your clothes and washing your face. You find Hyunjin clad in beige and white checkered pajamas, his glasses pushing back his silky hair as he hunches over his journal, scribbling away before erasing what he wrote.

“Struggling with lyrics?” you ask, leaning against the wall and he startles. “Do you float on the ground? Why can I never hear you come in?”

“Or maybe you just love being dramatic,” you sing-song, laying atop his bed, much more at ease than the previous night.

Hyunjin sticks his tongue out childishly in response, and you playfully mimic the gesture before both of you dissolve into happy giggles.

“Kind of,” he explains once you both settle down, “I have this specific feeling in mind that I need to convey.”

“You'll do well,” you reassure softly, “your lyrics are always so beautiful. Remember Cover me?” you smile and he scratches the back of his ear, a shy grin spreading across his face.

“You still listen to it?” he asks and you nod eagerly, attempting to belt into Seungmin’s ending high note. You fail horribly and Hyunjin throws a crumpled piece of paper on your face to get you to stop singing.

“My poor ears,” he laughs loudly, and you retaliate by throwing back a pillow on his head.

“You just don’t get my artistic abilities.”

“I’d get them more if you stayed silent.”

You gasp, faking offense as you stand up to tickle Hyunjin on his chair, he starts squirming immediately, his loud giggles spilling all over the room, coating it in vibrant hues of happiness, and you’re suddenly captivated by the sight of him— his head thrown back, a golden lock framing his laughter-filled eyes, his top lowering slightly to reveal glimpses of his collarbones and the delicate veins that trace enticing paths on his neck.

You pause, your hand hovering over the side of his stomach, as a long-forgotten warmth spreads through your heart, like the first rays of dawn greeting the earth after a long winter night. It doesn’t diffuse quickly through your being, but rather drapes like sticky honey on your veins, making you well aware of your growing blush, of how beautiful Hyunjin is in his joy.

“Never singing to you again,” you clear your throat, laying atop his bed once again, and quickly reaching for your phone, anything to avoid his eyes which rival the crescent moon outside his window.

Hours pass before a warm hand gently settles on your shoulder, rousing you from your slumber. Blinking away the fog of sleep, you find Hyunjin leaning over you, his grin wide and infectious. “Wake up,” he whispers, but you only groan, burying your face deeper into his pillow.

He doesn’t yield, taking hold of your wrist and guiding your drowsy figure upright, before wrapping the blanket snugly around your shoulders. Without a word, he leads you out onto his balcony, carefully putting his neon green beanie on your head to shield you from the cold.

“It’s snowing!” he smiles, and his excited tone manages to dissipate the fog in your mind. You blink repeatedly and soon enough, you too behold the fallen snowflakes, each one resembling a tiny speck of light bidding farewell to the sky to greet the earth.

“You missed the first snow so I didn’t want you to miss this one too,” he explains, and his thoughtfulness blankets you with a warmth that seeps into every crevice in your body, drips down your fingertips and makes the cold of 4 a.m. seem less harsh, less biting to the touch.

You don’t know how to say thank you, because those two words don’t encapsulate the depths of gratitude that you feel for Hyunjin. Because he is speaking to the person within you who still loves snow, the part buried underneath layers of dust from a ground heartbreak. But you still manage to hear him, and you squeeze his hand tightly, and he doesn’t let go until you finally do.

❁ ❁ ❁

Remembering has become easier for you these past two months— both the good and the bad. And each day, the scale tips towards one side or the other. Sometimes you recall the suffocation you felt with him, the feeling that no matter what you did you could never please him, that your hands were crafted to break rather than mend. And on those days your wound grows, it throbs and bleeds different emotions.

Sometimes it's anger— at him for treating your heart so carelessly as if you were a being devoid of feeling. And then at you— for staying, for giving him excuses and desperately searching for goodness within him, for the one redeeming quality that would convince you he was worth the pain.

And other days bring an excruciating sadness along, a weight that presses down upon you until you're paralyzed. Because you feel bad for yourself and for everything you went through. Because you’re unsure how to rise when unseen hands push you deeper into the abyss.

And on these days, Seungmin becomes your anchor. He buys your favorite food, skips classes with you, and takes you to your favorite gardens. He talks and he talks and you try your best to laugh because you do not wish to worry him more. It is enough to be your own burden, you do not wish to burden him too.

But when he drops you home, your facade slips away, the smile fading from your face as if it were never truly yours to wear. You are too tired to pretend so you don’t, and Hyunjin doesn’t let you, either. He brews you tea and orders takeout because he knows you lack the energy for cooking. He goes with you on walks and drapes you in pieces of his clothing— scarves and beanies and gloves because he knows you couldn’t care less about a cold when there is a frost coating your bones. He lets you sit in his room while he works on his songs, and while he paints. Sometimes you talk and often you don't need to. But he’s there. He's there with you.

But you also remember the good. You remember your movie night with the boys, Hyunjin building an entire fort for you, adorned with twinkling lights and the softest blankets. How you watched movies until 5 a.m. your bodies so closely huddled together that there was no room left for sadness.

You recall Hyunjin begging you to build a snowman with him at the crack of dawn, the two of you collapsing in fits of laughter as you threw snowballs at one another, your footsteps marking the fresh fallen snow.

You remember being so exhausted after one of your showers that you simply laid atop the couch, gaze fixed on the void, too drained to even untangle the knots in your hair. Yet, it is not the tiredness that you exactly recall, nor the salty tears you shed underneath the scorching water jet. But it is Hyunjin's tender hands as he brushed through your hair, his fingers tracing the nape of your neck, his knuckles ghosting over the slate of your shoulder. You remember whispering that it was a particularly hard day and Hyunjin understanding. You remember him watching many YouTube tutorials to prepare your favorite seaweed soup, only for it to end up being too salty. But you still ate it all, because he made it for you, to lift your wounded spirits. And that alone was enough for it to taste good.

You remember your heart hardening then softening again, breaking then stitching itself back together, closing off then blooming like flowers on the first day of spring. You remember smiling only to cry then smile again. And you remember liking snow, a bit more than you thought you would. Because Hyunjin was there, holding your trembling hand, steadying it enough for you to rewrite your memories with winter.

So, you want to say thank you.

You do not wish to spell it out, because there are too many things to thank Hyunjin for and too few words to do so. Instead, you drag him to the farmer’s market near your home, and you tell him to help you pick flowers.

“I could be in bed watching my favorite show and yet here I am bestowing you with my enchanting presence,” he sighs, not too modestly, as you both eye the array of colorful blooms.

“Okay, Shakespeare, are you done?” you roll your eyes, attempting your best to hide your grin.

“Done annoying you? Never. These are very pretty,” he adds, pointing to the white roses in full bloom, their delicate petals emitting a sweet fragrance into the air.

“I agree, what else should we add?” you ponder, picking out four roses.

“Mm, Hibiscus? The red in the center is so vibrant,” he suggests, taking out his phone to capture the flower.

“Cute. Baby breath’s would look good too,” you say as you gather the flowers, heading to the cashier with Hyunjin trailing behind, still admiring the delicate blooms.

“Can I write a note?” you ask the middle-aged man as he wraps the bouquet in a powder blue paper.

“Sure,” he replies with a smile, and you return the gesture, quickly jotting down your words.

“Are you done?” Hyunjin grins when you return to his side and you nod, exiting the flower shop.

“What do you think?” you ask, angling the bouquet towards him.

“It's beautiful.”

“It’s yours,” you smile, growing shier at the intensity of his gaze as it lands on you, then the flowers, then on you again. “Take it,” you hand it to him, your cheeks flushing like the hibiscus’s crimson core.

“Actually?” he says softly, his fingers trembling slightly as he accepts the flowers and you nod in response. You bite your lip as you watch him take out the note, his eyes softening once he reads the words inscribed in it— thank you for making my winter less cold.

“Should we go?” you say a tad too cheerfully, turning away, but Hyunjin grabs your wrist, spinning you around once more. His fingers trail up your arm, coming to rest gently on your cheek as he leans down to plant a tender kiss there.

“Thank you,” he murmurs, his lips lingering against your skin for a moment longer than necessary. You think that if his soft lips grace your skin a few times more, your nerve endings might forget the harshness they were subjected to. If his gentle hands remain on your cheeks, then maybe, your heart would heal quicker, better. Maybe your past self that you long for would emerge again, maybe Hyunjin would be able to unearth it.

Your hopeful thoughts disappear as quickly as they arrive, overshadowed by a sense of helplessness that crashes over you, all of the sudden. You sense him before you hear him, the familiar anxiety that is only synonymous with your ex’s presence.

“Yn?” the sound of your name feels harsher in his mouth, the syllables spat out rather than spoken tenderly, as they are when Hyunjin pronounces it. Your veins run cold as his voice pierces the air, your heart skipping three beats at once before plummeting to your knees. You wrap your hand around Hyunjin’s forearm instinctively, and he looks down at you, his expression morphing into one of concern.

You’re unsure of what he sees in you— whether it is your pale face, the quiver of your lower lip, or the fear that has coated all your features— but his eyes harden, his brows furrowing as he gazes at the man behind you.

You refuse to turn around, bracing yourself for his next words. “Yn,” he repeats his tone laced with anger, his fingertips grazing your arm as if intending to force you to face him. But before he can touch you, Hyunjin intervenes, swiftly stepping in between you and your ex, shielding you with his own body protectively.

“Leave,” Hyunjin's voice is cold, dripping with a venomous edge you've never heard from him before, his jaw clenching with barely contained fury.

“Is this your new shiny toy, Yn?” your ex taunts and his voice cuts through your being against your will, triggering a flood of memories you've tried so desperately to suppress. Memories of his cruelty, his manipulation, and the pain he inflicted upon you—using your love as a weapon to bolster his own ego.

“What's in it for you?” you find your voice again, though it trembles when you speak. He is the very embodiment of your pain and everything you loathe about yourself. You wish for the ground to swallow you whole, for a bolt of lightning to strike the earth, anything to spare you from facing him.

“It's only been three months, I didn't know you were a whore.”

Hyunjin's fist connects with his cheek before you can register his words. It all unfolds so rapidly that you barely have time to comprehend it. Your ex staggers back, blood trickling from the cut on his lip, while Hyunjin stands before you, his chest heaving with restrained anger, his right hand clenched into a fist, the bouquet still held tightly in the other.

“Fine, I deserved it,” your ex chuckles, his voice laced with mockery as he wipes the blood from his lip. His gaze meets yours briefly behind Hyunjin's back.

“You might not be a whore but you are unlovable, keep that in mind.” He spits out before walking away, crude words that tear at every scab covering your wounds, reopening them with a brutal force. Hyunjin moves to follow him, but you grab his shirt, pulling him back.

“He’s not worth it,” you murmur.

Your words seem to snap Hyunjin out of his haze as he turns to look at you, worry cast across his figure. He moves to cradle your cheeks but you step back, refusing to meet his eyes. He swallows thickly, clutching the bouquet in his hands. “Are you okay?”

You let out a heavy sigh, your shoulders slumping as you shake your head slightly. “Let's just go home,” you whisper, eyes fleeting to his for a split second. All the lights in your gaze are muted.

You’re crumbling before him once again and he cannot stop it, no matter how much he yearns to.

It's long past midnight when you find yourself seated on the floor of your living room, a bottle of red wine placed between you and Hyunjin. You exchange it wordlessly, taking turns sipping from it, the alcohol warming your insides but doing little to ease the ache in your heart. You don’t exactly recall when Hyunjin sat next to you, but you don’t mind. You were too lost in your own thoughts to even register his presence.

“Yn,” he calls out softly and you hum absentmindedly, memories of when your ex spoke your name haunting you, each time he yelled your name, uttered it in disdain as if it was the starting point of everything wrong with you.

“Talk to me, please?” he pleads, angling his body towards your own. But you refuse to meet his eyes and Hyunjin’s heart twists in his chest. He is afraid of all the ugly thoughts that must roam your mind. He wishes he could enter it, open the windows wide, and usher the light in.

“I'm sorry you were dragged into this,” you say, your gaze fixated on the bouquet placed atop the table. The crimson painted on the hibiscus’ petals reminds you of the blood that spilled from your ex’s mouth, and your gaze fleets to Hyunjin's hand, slightly bruised from the punch.

“Don’t apologize,” he whispers, “there is nothing to be sorry for.”

It’s as though you don’t hear him, your fingers trailing gently across his scraped knuckles, tears pooling in your eyes the more you stare at his hand.

“Does it hurt?” you ask, voice thick with emotion, and Hyunjin’s quick to shake his head. “No, don’t worry about it. He deserved it.”

“You didn’t deserve to be hurt.”

“Neither did you.”

Your disbelieving scoff that follows scares him. What if you’re slipping away into a dark place yet again, one void and barricaded, in which the only sound that echoes is your ex’s hurtful words? What if he can’t reach you again?

“If the only person I’ve ever loved says I’m unlovable then maybe I am.”

You’re drunk, you wouldn’t have said such an ugly thing otherwise, wouldn’t have allowed this sentiment to materialize into the air, to take a tangible form apart from your abstract thoughts.

“No,” Hyunjin says in a panic as though he’s trying to quickly pull the brakes on your free-railing thoughts. He cups your face between his palms, your tears falling freely atop his hands but he does not move away.

“No,” he repeats, more calmly this time. “How he treated you is a reflection of who he is. And how you see him is a reflection of who you are. And you wanted him to be loving because you’re full of love. You wanted him to be good because you are a good person. And he can’t stomach that, can’t stomach that you are happy without him so he’s trying to ruin you again.”

“Hyunjin…” you shake your head but he only inches closer to you, his thumbs gently caressing your cheekbones. “No, listen to me. Seungmin loves you so much he couldn’t eat properly for the first few days you stayed here, texted me all the time asking me how you were and if you were feeling better. He isn't good with words so instead he tries to make you laugh. He wishes he could give up parts of his happiness for you.”

A sob swells within you but Hyunjin presses on. “And Minho, he tried to memorize all your favorite recipes so he could cook them for you. It isn’t a coincidence that every time we go over to their dorm it is your favorite food that we eat. He takes more pictures of his cats these days so he could send them to you because he knows it cheers you up.”

“You told me Changbin doesn’t know you well enough to fight for you but when we saw your ex across the campus one day he wanted to get up and beat him. He always asks me if you are well and if there is something he can do for you, anything.”

He inhales deeply, tears welling up in his eyes as well. “And me…” a tender smile graces his lips as he gazes at you, “you make this house a home. I feel like my true self when you are around and loneliness doesn’t come to me as often as it did. Because you are here. You are like a beam of sunlight that lightens up every life you touch, mine first,” he’s baring his soul to you, vulnerable yet resolute. “So tell me, Yn, what’s not to love in you when you yourself are so full of love?”

“Hyune,” you speak the nickname for the first time, and Hyunjin’s heart thrashes achingly around his ribcage. “If you keep talking like this I might end up loving you,” you smile sadly at him as if it is a terrible thing to be loved by you.

“But I don’t want to love you, because I won’t know how to, not anymore. So I'll end up leaving. And I'll long for you, and I don't think I can stomach longing for you from afar.”

“So please,” you place one hand atop his own, wipe away the lone tear rolling down his cheek. “Don’t make me love you, hm? You deserve more than to be loved by someone like me.”

You leave Hyunjin in the living room, alone before the white flowers you gifted him. He doesn’t want to put them away in a vase, for as soon as he grabbed them from your hold, everything around you both crumbled. So he leaves them there for the night, the creamy white petals aglow underneath the moonlight. He spends the night painting the bouquet from memory, but the petals end up too tinged with red, perhaps mirroring the blood his heart refuses to stop spilling still.

He did not realize it before, maybe he blinded himself so he wouldn’t see what was before him all along. But it is all the clearer to him now— that in his attempts to make you love winter again, Hyunjin only ended up loving you.

A week later.

hyune [1:25 a.m.]: i miss you

You and Hyunjin spent the last seven days avoiding one another, well you more than him. He just understood your silent plea when you took a step back the one time he tried to talk to you in the kitchen, swallowing thickly before inching away, allowing you to move past him.

You did not know how to face him after what he said, partly because you were embarrassed by your own response, mostly because even in your drunken daze, his words etched themselves permanently into your memory.

It is his reassuring words that echoed in your brain for the past week, not those of your ex.

hyune [1: 26 a.m.]: and i miss sleeping on the couch

You giggle, shaking your head before replying.

yn [1:26 a.m.]: no you don’t

hyune [1:26 a.m.]: no i don’t ㅠㅠ

but i finished the song

wanna hear?

Walking to Hyunjin’s room feels as familiar as going into your own. And when your gaze finally meets his you can’t help but break into a relieved smile. It was foolish of you to punish yourself, enough people have done that for you already.

“Hey,” he greets tentatively, and you respond with an awkward wave, a moment pregnant with anticipation passes before both of you dissolve into laughter.

“What is this? Are we in middle school,” he teases and you giggle, settling comfortably on his bed once more.

“I know. We are so lame.”

“You are,” he corrects with a grin and you gasp, pretending to leave but he quickly catches your hand, stopping you. “No, please stay. I meant it when I said that I missed you,” he repeats quietly, as if afraid that his confession would make you run away once again.

Your heart aches, the knots in your stomach tightening and unraveling all at once. “I missed you too,” you admit softly, and he smiles, his thumb tracing a gentle path above your pulse before releasing your hand.

“So it's done then?” you ask and he nods, running a hand through his hair with a hint of anxiety. “How do you feel about it?”

“Good. I hope you’ll like it, mostly.”

“I'm sure I will,” you reassure him with a soft smile, and he nods once more, pressing a few buttons before his melodious whistles fill the air once again.

Nothing could have braced you for the sound of Hyunjin's voice that followed, its timbre soft as silk yet imbued with profound sorrow. It's as though he recorded the song on one of his loneliest nights, his honeyed vocals dipped in an excruciating nostalgia that seeps into every corner of the room, every corner of your heart.

In the faded photo, I come across a smile spread across a youthful face, overlapped with the seasons.

Your gaze flickers to Hyunjin as a shadow of recollection dawns on you. You remember telling him that you couldn’t stomach looking at pics of your past, ones in which you smiled so freely because you were blissfully unaware of what was to come.

The night’s so cold that it’s almost unreal.

Because you weren’t aware of the winter that will follow and the biting cold that it would bear, for everything that will go astray in your relationship, for your ex's facade to crack like a glacier succumbing to the pressure of lies and pretense.

I wake up in another silence, and I close my eyes.

You remember Hyunjin confessing that silence haunted him more than words ever could, and you had agreed, sharing how sometimes you shut your eyes, pretending that the reality you woke up to wasn't the one you were living.

The white flower we planted together has bloomed. I do not dare pick it. Now it withers away.

You gaze at the white flowers you brought him, now wilted in the vase placed on his desk, yet Hyunjin refuses to throw them still. You see the card you wrote for him hung on the wall, right next to the dried red rose. He kept it. Though it withered, he kept it all.

So I long for you. And I long for you. And I'll long for you.

You remember the longing you both spoke of, how he understood a feeling you felt so incredibly alone in. How he tried to reassure you when he too was caught in the webs of the past. How you longed for him in the past week. How you wished he longed for you just the same.

So I can keep loving you. So I could be loving you. And morе.

The violin swells and so does the emotion in your chest. You remember him asking you ‘What’s not to love in you’ and how you've spun those words in your thoughts ever since. You remember thinking that if he gave you a few more weeks, just a bit more time, you might have found it in you to believe them.

You see Hyunjin’s glimmering eyes holding yours, you see his heart atop a platter handed to you, and you see the resignation in his being. Don’t make me love you, you told him. You didn’t dare to tell him not to love you in return, deemed it too foolish of thought to entertain.

For he was Hwang Hyunjin, the quiet producer who paints in his free time and who wears his heart on his sleeve. Who remains hopeful, loving, and tender, despite the thorns pricking at his side. Who is beautiful, so much so that he allowed you to see beauty in the universe once again, through his eyes.

How could he love you?

How could you not love him?

“The song,” you whisper, the words barely escaping your lips as you stand, trembling, on your feet. Hyunjin rises too, meeting you in the center of his room.

“It is about you. For you,” he says simply as if his words don’t cause your world to burst at the seams only to mend itself once again, too eager to fix itself and exist in the same timeline as Hyunjin.

“I don't… I don’t know what to say,” you say earnestly, feeling your heart pound in your chest, its beats resounding loudly in your ears.

It is wrong of you to assume he wishes you to say something. He is Hyunjin, the one who finds words in your silences too, after all.

“I don’t need you to say anything,” he shakes his head, taking another step closer to you. “I don't want an answer, I don't wish to pressure you. I just wanted to tell you that my love is here, it is yours to take or to leave, to cherish or to discard. But it is yours, because this is who I am. I am someone who loves you.”

“So do not tell me to forget you because I don't know how to. And don’t tell me that you’ll leave because I will love you still, because you’d still be you, near or far, you are you. And you are someone I long for.” He pauses, his voice softening. “And I long for you, Yn, more than anything I've ever longed for. And I've spent all my life longing.”

His lips meet your forehead tenderly, and you feel your entire being grow limp at the chaste kiss, as if your limbs wish to liquefy and form a puddle on the floor. His touch is soft, and you miss it the moment he parts from you.

“There must be something in this room that keeps on making you cry,” he smiles and you bring your hands to your damp cheeks, surprised to find there tears you didn’t realize had fallen.

“It’s you,” you pinch his arm playfully and he squirms away from your hold, stabbing his toe on the desk in the process. A loud fuck echoes around the room, and your laughter dissipates the tension clinging into the air.

“Can you play it again?” you request softly and Hyunjin’s theatrics fade as a shy smile tugs at the corner of his lips.

“Is it good?”

“It's everything to me.”

“It's called ‘long for you’, by the way.”

“Long for you,” you repeat quietly. There has never been a prettier combination of words.

The title all but makes sense as you lay on the bed, your gaze fixed on the paintings hung on the wall, Hyunjin sketching quietly on his desk, the song resonating softly in the background. You've longed for many things in your life—the person you once were and the tender love you once craved—but amidst it all, nothing has weighed heavier on your heart than the longing for the man sitting just two meters away, almost in your loving grasp. Almost.

❁ ❁ ❁

It is an excruciating five days that Hyunjin spends apart from you, the both of you too caught up in your assignments to find a moment to properly speak. But you do not shy away from him when he greets you, and your grin is kind as it drapes across his being, and Hyunjin swears he has never seen a prettier sight than you smiling.

On the sixth night, Hyunjin completes the cover for the song— a figure wrapped around itself protectively, mirroring the way you hug yourself in your sleep. He hangs it on the wall, right next to your thank you card and the white bouquet he drew once again, wishing to properly immortalize its beautiful flowers, to purify that memory from the tumult that followed it.

On the sixth night, the house is quiet, the full moon high up in the sky, snowflakes falling softly to the ground. Hyunjin wonders if you too mimicked the snow’s descent— both of you falling apart with it.

But then, there’s a knock on his door.

His heart catches in his throat, his body freezing as if it forgot how to move. You are here.

“Come in,” he manages to say, his voice barely above a whisper. You push the door open, and Hyunjin's words wilt on his tongue as he sees what you're carrying—another bouquet, filled with white flowers, yet again.

“Hey,” you smile, standing by the door.

He remains silent, unsure of what to say, or how to speak. He longs for you when you are away, even more so when you’re before him.

“We shouldn't let these white flowers wither away too, right?” you smile slightly, placing the bouquet on the desk before walking to Hyunjin’s bedside. His voice falters, vocal cords refusing to move and overshadow your voice.

You sit beside him, gently pulling his hand so that you’d both lie on the pillows. Your hand doesn’t leave his own, instead, it moves to rest on his cheek, reminiscent of the many times he had cradled your face before. Inch by inch, you close the gap between you, nuzzle the tip of your nose against his own. “Hi, Hyune”, you say softly, and he swallows thickly, his voice coming out just as quietly.

“Hi, my Yn.”

“If we take care of the white flowers together do you think they’ll survive a bit longer?” you ask, your gaze never wavering from his, countless stars twinkling in the depths of your irises.

“I believe so,” he says tentatively, too aware of the warmth of your palm against his skin, of the sweet ache unfurling within his being.

“Mm, and even if they wilt we can always buy new ones. We can learn how to care for them better, with time,” you say, and he nods in agreement, laying his hand atop your own, tilting his head to bestow a chaste kiss on your palm.

“With time,” he echoes softly and you smile, vulnerable yet secure in his gray sheets, in his hold.

“Will you give me time too?” you ask, and Hyunjin reads in your eyes what you mean, understands in the shake of your voice the question you are too afraid to voice. Will he give you time to heal in order to love?

“As long as you need. I’m not going anywhere,” he reassures, pressing his forehead gently atop yours, and you both close your eyes, as a running warmth encloses you both, blooms a blush on both your cheeks.

His arms wrap around your back, drawing you close until your chests are pressed together, your head resting naturally in the curve of his neck. And it is long forgotten in your mind, all the nights you slept in this very bed alone. You feel safe, safe enough to long for love knowing that it patiently awaits you behind the door, once you find enough courage to turn the doorknob. You feel serene, as Hyunjin’s warm palms glide soothingly up and down your spine, as every muscle, every nerve, every atom in your being relaxes in his hold.

You are healing, slowly, with each fleeting second that passes in which Hyunjin’s heartbeat resounds within your chest, as its melody runs through your veins, melds with your own as if it was destined to be there all along. As you rest in Hyunjin, as you find a safe home within his soul to discard your worries at the doorstep and breathe.

“It did get better,” you whisper, pressing a kiss to his shoulder blade. “Hm?” He leans back to look at you, and he’s so beautiful, so tender as he gazes at you, you can’t help but trace the contours of his face with your fingers, hoping to commemorate him with your eyes, with your touch.

“You promised me it’ll get better, and it did,” you smile, as your legs further intertwine with his, and his rose perfume becomes an indelible mark on your skin. “Too bad I can't hit your pretty face now,” you joke and he giggles, tipping his head back.

He's so beautiful, body and soul, and he longs for you, you alone.

“But I can still do this,” you murmur before finally pressing your lips against his like a boat finally reaching the shore after months of sailing. You both exhale, in yearning, in relief, as your mouths move together in a slow, languid dance, his hand finding the pulse on your neck, yours settling atop his jaw.

He would kiss you again, this intimately, in the coming months, when your heart expands enough to contain the love Hyunjin deserves. He would kiss you again, when your past comes to haunt you, and healing sounds like an elusive myth you’d never encounter in your life.

And he would kiss you again, over the kitchen table and under the fridge’s light, in between paintings and in supermarket aisles, while picking flowers and watching the first snow.

He would kiss you, this tenderly, in the next winter, and the ones after it, as if his longing for you never wanes. Till blow three disappears from your memory, till all you remember is the love, the true one, the kind one, the soft one Hyunjin alone could have brought you.

1K notes · View notes

gatitties · 6 months

Note

Hello again my little butterfly 🦋✨

I came to place another order if that's ok! so, the scenario is a One Piece AU, where YN has an arranged marriage with Shanks, who is one of the richest men in town, but even so, YN decides to run away on her wedding day and throw herself off a bridge, but she can't, they find her and the family manages to bring her back to the wedding, Shanks is a man very much in love with YN, the moment he sees the sadness in YN's eyes when she walks up the aisle and puts the ring on her finger Shanks, he decides to conquer her and make her the happiest wife in the world! ( PS: Shanks is in a desperate situation when he learns that his beloved literally decided to throw herself off a bridge rather than stay with him, even little sad :( )

─Shanks x wife!reader

─Summary: you didn't want to be part of that ceremony, but you're not brave enough to run away either

─Warnings: slight mention of suicide attempt, modern AU

Oh hi hi love!! 🫶🏻🦋 you really like angst 😳

You ignored the perplexed looks of people, without stopping or thinking about a second option, you gripped the thin white fabric of your wedding dress harder so as not to trip over it, your shoes had long since disappeared so you could run more comfortably. You didn't want this, you didn't want to marry an unknown guy, no one thought about your feelings? It's not something your parents have the right to play with and you weren't going to let them ruin your life for financial convenience.

The moment adrenaline started to increase when you saw how you were now being persecuted, probably due to the absence in the ceremony that was taking place in the nearby church, you felt bad for the man you had been engaged to, since it wasn't his fault either and you didn't even know him enough to determine that he was a horrible person, but this decision was too hasty and you definitely didn't agree to this.

With your heart in your throat you ran until you tripped over your own sore feet, your breathing accelerated even more when you heard shouts of your name, taking courage again you stood up with a new impetus, although when you noticed how the distance between your pursuers was shortening more and more, your brain began to draw an extreme line in your thoughts.

Would it hurt? Could you die? Well, you were going to see for yourself what it felt like to jump off a bridge just to avoid facing an unwanted fate.

You quickly climbed onto the thick railing, stabilizing yourself standing on it, the next few seconds felt like a blur, like a part of memory that was difficult to remember, the fear of possible death and the indecision that comes with taking a long time to jump into the void made one of the guys chasing you caught you before you did something crazy.

The next thing you know after that, you were back in one of the private rooms of the church, being yelled at by your mother while your father looked on disapprovingly, you didn't care, nothing mattered to you at that moment, you let them go back to put on your makeup, you let them put new shoes on you and they changed the dirty surface fabric of your dress as if you were a doll, lifeless.

The ceremony returned to its course, Shanks waited awkwardly all this time at the altar, and when he saw you appear next to him his heart shattered, you weren't even looking at him, your eyes were lost somewhere far away in this unwanted reality, you lacked any kind of expression. He knew it, he knew how you felt, and yet he felt a little selfish for wanting to be your husband, for wanting to love you unconditionally, this marriage may be arranged, but he admired every drop of courage you poured out to prevent this event, every anger and every fierce response you gave to the first meetings between both families.

"Now… husband and wife, you can kiss each other."

You were both so absorbed in your own thoughts that you barely heard the priest's last words. Shanks was the first to step forward, holding your waist slowly as if he were asking permission and asking if it was okay to do so. You didn't move an inch, your eyes were still lost even when he sealed your fate with a cold kiss devoid of love, at least, lacking on your part.

Shanks knew it wouldn't be easy, that you weren't going to trust, that he wasn't going to receive tons of affection, even looks, he knew you were in a delicate state, after all, you'd rather almost kill yourself than get married.

You didn't bother with his emotions, you didn't bother to ask about his tastes, his hobbies or how his day had been, you just spent the days dead, repeating your routine, your life remained the same in a way, a few more numbers in the account. but in exchange of what? Your freedom and decision. You were hurt, you had been damaged by your own parents, your emotional wounds would not heal overnight and you would refuse to show a modicum of affection until you recovered.

Shanks knew that he would have to sleep alone for months, that an empty house would await him, that all his praise and gifts would be quickly discarded, but it doesn't matter, maybe you didn't look for him or you didn't want him, but as your husband, he would do everything he could to at least help you cope with the situation, he really loves you, but it won't be easy to win your affection because you never wanted this.

Your heart began to heal over time, it took a long time, you decided to completely break the relationship with your family, although before they were the only ones you could turn to, Shanks showed you that he would be there, that despite not being the husband that you chose as such, made you trust him, made you feel loved again.

He wasn't a bad man, he wasn't the most wonderful person in the world either, but he proved to be enough for you to stop feeling that emptiness inside your heart, step by step he managed to break the walls that you built around your emotions, Shanks turned out to be something unexpected in your life, someone you didn't think would be so important and he was able to grant some peace, some happiness back into your life.

Maybe you are not yet ready to accept that he is your husband, but you slowly began to meet someone you could voluntarily fall in love with.

#one piece #op #one piece x reader #one piece modern au #modern au #shanks #shanks x reader #x reader #husband shanks #wife reader #fem reader #request #one piece x fem reader #shanks x wife reader #sfw #reader insert #xreader #angst?

295 notes · View notes

zynxwrite · 10 months

Note

hey darling <3 hope you are well rested today! may i request something like when neteyam and lo’ ak say something hurtful about sibling!reader thinking she’s not there but she accidentally overhears? if its not too much, can it have fluffish ending? no pressure take your time 🦋

𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐇𝐀𝐓𝐄 𝐌𝐄?

pairings ❰ Neteyam x Sibling!F!Reader, Lo' ak x Sibling!F!Reader (Separated) Spider x Reader (briefly)

You overhear your brother talking hurtful things behind your back. How could he?

GENRE: Angst, comfort after. WARNINGS: none.

NETEYAM.

You, the middle child of the family had always tried to fit in. Never really had a role to take. You were just you. The plain old [Name] with no purpose to being a sully. You were always what they call annoying; A brat who can't behave. Even you really don't know why you act like this-you can't control yourself and just eventually do something. Or you accidentally shout and hurt someone just by it.

"Freak. She does not deserve to be a Sully." What you commonly hear when the Na'vi speak of you.

"That girl is mad. Disrespectful. A dog to her family." And it can even come to this.

You were an outcast to them. To your family, you think. You were nothing but a dog to them. Still, your family loves you. Maybe Especially your sisters, Kiri and Tuktirey. Even if they cannot understand your situation-they're always there for you. Kiri was your adoptive older sister. And you were her first sister. As children, you were both inseparable, like how glue sticks to a paper.

The relationship of you and your edest brother were never really that close. But you admire him a lot. A lot. You admired him more than your father. He was more likely the father of your siblings than your actual one. Jake was always hard on you and even your siblings.

"I will never treat you like a nothing. Promise." A lie.

Scratches, injuries were present to your legs. You were not supposed to go hunting, you disobeyed your father again. All you wanted was just to prove your worth.

Neteyam began to speak to a mutual friend, assuming you were not there to hear his words. But there you were, behind a tree listenig to their conversation as you watch them just finished fishing.

"I don't get [Name] at all! I always try to teach her but she just does not listen. It's getting annoying, truth. She's a brat." Neteyam crossed his arms while sharing something to a friend. And the friend happens to agree. Of course it will. They always do.

"I do not know how she can even be related to you at all."

"Neither do I. She's not a sister of mine."

The words hit you like a punch to the gut, and your eyes welled up with tears. You had always admired your sibling, looking up to them for guidance and support. Hearing them talk about you in such a hurtful manner shattered your heart, leaving you feeling vulnerable and betrayed.

He continued, "She thinks everything is so easy, and she can just coast through life. It's infuriating how she goes about her days, seemingly without a care in the world, while the rest of us are trying to keep it all together." Unable to bear the pain any longer, you accidentally reveal yourself, finally being seen.

Neteyam's eyes widened as he saw you. Knowing that you probably heard all that he said about you. Feeling a mix of sadness and anger, you managed to whisper, "I didn't know you felt this way... I never meant to disappoint you." The voice of yours cracked with emotion as you turned and left the place, needing time to process the hurtful revelation.

"Shit. Wait, [Name]!-] But you already left both of them before he could even say another word. You were also known for being fast, your legs were like the sibling of the winds. Fast.

Oh, great mother. What has he done? Such shitty thing to say.

What you didn't know that Spider was also in the same place as you. Hearing all the words your brother said to you. His plan was to scare you so he followed you. But he didn't know that it would lead to this. Your human friend then followed you.

You didn't know where you were running. But the speed of your legs just kept running. Running to whatever you stop to. Before you could even realize you were completely far away from the village.

A sound coming from a bush entered the core of your ears. But you ignored it. Not wanting to pay attention to anything anymore. 'Neither do I. She's not a sister of mine.' This. This piece of crap. Such words.

Tears welled up in your eyes as you clenched your fists, feeling a knot the my stomach. You wanted to run away, but your feet felt glued to the floor, unable to move. The pain of his words pierced through your soul, leaving me feeling worthless and unloved. You always knew that the people disliked you. But never expected your brother to hate you as well. Thoughts started to circle all over you. Do your sisters find you unlovable as well? Your mother? Overthinking made you hurt more.

"[Name]?" That voice. You recognized it. Suddenly, you felt a gentle touch on your shoulder, and turned to see none other than Spider, the closest friend you had. The only one. He had been your rock through thick and thin, always there to lend a listening ear or a comforting hand. You two shared a lot in common. Being disliked by the people.

"Hey," he said softly, his voice filled with concern, "I heard what happened. Are you okay?" What do you think. You couldn't hold back the tears any longer. They cascaded down your cheeks as you whispered, "I don't know what's wrong with me. Why did he say that?"

"Am I that much of a brat?" You were sitting, and he was standing. Spider pulled you into a warm embrace, letting you cry on his shoulder-accidentally wiping the blue paint off his skin.

"You're not the problem, and you're not alone," he said firmly. "Sometimes people say hurtful things out of frustration or their own issues. But that doesn't define who you are. You're strong, caring, and deserving of love." More tears started to form you. But this time it wasn't tears of that feeling.

As you cried, Spider stayed with you, providing a safe space for your pain. His presence and words brought some comfort to your shattered heart. While the hurtful words from your so called brother lingered, Spider's support reminded you that you had someone who genuinely cared for me. You hope your sisters didn't hate you too.

"Thank you, Spider."

"How stupid can you be?!" Kiri yelled. "Brother...Why would you say that? You know she's sensitive! Norm said she had difficulty expressing herself." Kiri had heard about what he said from Spider, but never told Neteyam it was from him.

"You know how much she looks up to you and cares about your opinion. It's not fair to speak about her like that behind her back." Neteyam's face flushed with embarrassment and guilt. He fumbled for words but remained silent, realizing the gravity of his actions.

"I understand that siblings can have disagreements and conflicts," Kiri continued, her tone softening slightly. "But there are better ways to handle your feelings. You could talk to her directly and try to understand what's going on instead of making hurtful assumptions."

Neteyam looked down, clearly grappling with his emotions. "I didn't mean for her to hear that," he finally mumbled. "I was just frustrated, and it came out."

"I get that," Kiri acknowledged, "but you need to be more mindful of your words. They have consequences, and you hurt her deeply. She's your sister too, and she loves you despite everything. Don't take that for granted."

A mix of guilt and regret washed over Neteyam's face. He knew Kiri was right, and he had to take responsibility for his actions. "You're right," he admitted, his voice filled with remorse. "I messed up, and I need to apologize to her." Kiri nodded, appreciating his honesty. "It's not going to be easy, but you owe it to her and yourself to make things right," she said.

Later that day, Neteyam approached you. "Sister," sister.

"Can we talk?" he asked softly, and you hesitated for a moment before nodding. Sister... the word kept ringing inside that head of yours. "I need to apologize," Neteyam began, his voice genuine and vulnerable. "I said some awful things, and I can't even begin to express how sorry I am. I was frustrated, angry, and I took it out on you. But that was never right, and you didn't deserve any of it."

"I felt so disconnected from you," he continued. "It seemed like we were drifting apart, and I didn't know how to handle it. But I realize now that pushing you away was the worst thing I could have done." Confusion stirred in you. Was he actually sorry? You couldn't help but overthink.

"I'm sorry. You are my sister." Really?

Not even a second-You hugged him. Forgiveness has already been granted. You always thought how warm his hug was.

LO'AK.

As the sun dipped below the horizon, casting long shadows across the room, you could feel the tension in the air. The gathering at the village had started out joyous, but now it felt heavy with unspoken words and unresolved emotions. You had noticed your brother, Lo'ak, acting distant and on edge all evening, but you couldn't pinpoint the reason behind it.

"Hey, [Name]! Dance with us!" Your little sister, Tuk tried to pull you from the crowd. Sorry, Tuk.

"Uhm-I think I'm gonna go for a walk first. I'll dance with you later, promise!" Feeling overwhelmed, you decided to step out onto the crowd for a moment of solitude. As you moved away from the chatter inside, you overheard hushed voices and recognized Lo'ak's distinct tone. Curiosity got the better of you, and you couldn't resist eavesdropping on the conversation.

"I don't understand her," Lo'ak's voice carried the weight of frustration. "She's always so needy and emotionally sensitive. It's exhausting to be around her. It's so annoying." He sighed. "She doesn't act like a relative to me, bro." a friend of his nodded.

"Why did I even have a twin." why did he?

Each word hit you like a physical blow, and the tears that had been building up in your eyes finally spilled over. You felt the sting of hurt and betrayal, listening to your own brother talking about you in such a hurtful manner. You had always looked up to your twin and thought he cared for you deeply, but his words shattered that illusion.

Before you could retreat, Lo'ak's voice wavered with realization, "Wait, where did she go? Did she hear me?"

You took a deep breath, trying to compose yourself, but the pain was too raw. Still, you couldn't bear the thought of confronting him, not when he had uttered those words in the heat of the moment. Instead, you quietly slipped away and found a secluded corner on a tree to hide your tears.

It was already dark. You have been gone for almost an hour or two. The people have been worried about you. Where did you go? Were you safe? Tuk couldn't help but ask Neytiri every minute if you've already returned. But you were just nowhere to be seen.

Thankfully, Lo'ak eventually found you. It took him 30 minutes to find you with his Ikran. There you were, hugging your legs under a tree. He almost thought you fell asleep. But you weren't.

He landed his Ikran on the ground. There he stood, his expression pained and regretful. "I-I didn't know you were there," he stammered, his voice thick with emotion. "I didn't mean what I said. I was just frustrated, and I didn't think before I spoke."

Tears welled up in your eyes again, and you looked away, not wanting to show your vulnerability. "It doesn't excuse what you said," you replied, your voice shaky. "You really think I'm that unbearable?"

"No, no, that's not what I meant," Lo'ak pleaded, taking a step closer to you. "I've just been going through a lot lately, and I didn't know how to handle it. I never meant to hurt you." Despite your anger and hurt, you could see the sincerity in his eyes. You knew that he was struggling, but that didn't make his words hurt any less.

"I can't believe you said those things about me," you said, trying to hold back your tears. "I thought we were close." You were his twin.

"We are close," Lo'ak said, his voice cracking. "And that's why it hurts so much to see you upset. I've been a terrible brother, and I'm so sorry."

The pain in his voice tugged at your heart, and you felt conflicted. Part of you wanted to shut him out and protect yourself, but another part wanted to believe that he genuinely regretted his words.

"Please. I know you can't forgive me that easily. But you need to come back with me. They are worried about you."

"Take all the time you need," he said softly. "I'll be here when you're ready to talk, and I'll do whatever it takes to make things right." He took his hand out and placed it in the air. Gesturing it for you to hold on. But as you held his hand-he pulled you into a hug.

NOTE: SORRY I HAVEN'T WRITTEN FOR A LONG TIME AND I'M STRUGGLING BECAUSE I'M WORKING ON A NOVEL AOAHDJSJSBK. SORRY THE WRITING IS TERRIBLE. (I fr need to take lessons to improve my ass.) My writing style has changed hasn't it? AHH WRITERS BLOCK AND ART BLOCK GOT ME

I am also open for requests pookies <33

417 notes · View notes

rottenpumpkin13 · 3 months

Note

For my sanity what do you think sane!Seph would do if he came across a lost child while on a rare outing in Midgar?

• Sephiroth rarely ventures outside of Sector 0 unless it's a work obligation or his friends are dragging him off for mandatory "fun."

• However, this time he goes to a novelty store not too far from the HQ because of the tempting Queen's Blood card sales, the need for a gift for Genesis' upcoming birthday, and to find a replacement for his favorite mug that he broke.

• So he goes alone, but he doesn't mind. He enjoys walking, and it's nice to not wear his uniform for a change. Just as he's about to enter the store, he sees a child sitting on the sidewalk curb.

• He doesn't think much at first, but his eyes are sharper than his nerves, and he catches a lone tear rolling down the child's cheeks.

• A mix of rage and sympathy tears through him as he knows the child is probably lost. He wonders how any parent could lose their defenseless child.

• So he checks on the child, who explains that they let go of their mother's hand and got lost. The child begins to cry explaining this, and this makes Sephiroth nervous.

• He attempts to calm the child down by explaining that he will make sure that they're reunited with their mother. He pulls the child aside and inside the novelty store to escape passing onlookers who are starting to notice Sephiroth and a crying child.

• Inside, he considers his options. He could take them back to HQ and let officers handle the child and locate its mother. But that idea doesn't sit well with him. The thought of leaving the child alone in some corner of the HQ while who knows if its mother is even alive isn't good.

• He would call Angeal if he weren't on a mission, and Genesis is no good with children, let alone a child under stress.

• While he's debating, he refuses to let go of the child's hand, making sure to keep them close. When he hears a sniffle, he looks down. The child is clinging onto his leg right back, quiet but still silently crying and clearly distressed.

• He feels a strange feeling tie his stomach in a knot. The anger is back, he can't believe a mother would let go of her child's hand. Doesn't she care that it's upset? That it's crying and growing more distressed by the minute and it's wondering when she'll come back or even if she'll come back.

• More sniffling snaps Sephiroth out of his thoughts, and he kneels down, pulling a handkerchief from his pocket and carefully wiping the child's face and nose.

• He asks them if they know the phone number of his mother or any other adult in their life. The kid shakes its head no. Sephiroth should've figured. The child is much too young to remember something like that. He checks the tags on the child's jacket and grows impatient.

• If he had a child, he would've done better. He would've written his phone and address on the jacket to prevent something like this. He would've kept them close. He would've held their hand. He wouldn't have left; he would've stayed.

• It seems the last reasonable option to take is to wait for its mother for another thirty minutes. If she doesn't return, Sephiroth will go back to HQ and take care of it there, making sure to be as involved as he can and to not leave the child alone.

• Sephiroth picks the child up and holds them close. The child has stopped crying by now, and Sephiroth explains that they're going back out to wait for their mother. The sad look in the child's eyes would be enough to shatter him if he weren't the sole responsible adult in the child's life at that moment.

• They return back outside and sit on the store's front steps.

• They sit in silence for several minutes until the child starts asking questions. Of course, they know who Sephiroth is. They start asking him where his sword is, why his hair is so long, if the stories about how he defeats all the bad guys are true, and if his eyes are real. Sephiroth usually finds these questions tedious and mind-numbing, but on this particular occasion, he's happy to answer every single one, and even begins recounting a much more sanitized and child-friendly version of his last mission.

• Sephiroth is relieved when the child laughs at how "the monster ran away in fear" (in truth, Sephiroth slashed it repeatedly until it died).

• From the way Sephiroth repeatedly adjusts their jacket and gloves to keep them from the cold and keeps them close, one would've thought it was Sephiroth's child.

• And then finally, an exasperated woman runs towards them, glad to have finally found her child safe and sound.

• Sephiroth knows lashing out will do no good, so he bites his tongue and answers the grateful mother's questions with a straight face.

• In the end, the mother thanks him profusely and the two bid him goodbye. Sephiroth watches the child be carried off by its mother, waving to him happily.

• Sephiroth waves back.

• But then a heavy feeling settles over his chest; something thick and uncomfortable that makes it hard to breathe.

• He's happy the mother returned. Not all of them do. His didn't.

#ff7 #ffvii #final fantasy 7 #sephiroth #final fantasy vii #ffvii crisis core #ff7 crisis core #crisis core #writing

66 notes · View notes

asoiafsworld · 2 years

Text

STAND BY ME.

pairing; aemond targaryen x original female character (alysanne velaryon)

summary; alysanne velaryon, jacaerys velaryon's twin sister and daughter to queen rhaenyra targaryen, has been betrothed to aemond targaryen since she was a little girl and has loved him since then too. king viserys dies however and war breaks out between their families. when alysanne learns of her brother's death caused by the man she loves, she does the only right thing.

warnings; hotd 1x10 spoilers, mentions of stillbirth, mentions and descriptions of self harm, major character death, very sad and painful, alysanne has bad anger issues, and she has psychopathic tendencies, my oc is really a emotional rollercoaster, blood, violence, revenge, sad ending

author's note; this fic is very painful to read at times so i just want to warn once more and its not all about her relationship with aemond, theres a lot of stuff about alysanne with her family too. i was going to make this a reader imagine but i felt that an oc would suit this more since its so angsty and gets pretty violent, i hope u guys still enjoy <3 jacaerys and alysanne are aged up here and are both only two years younger than aemond (jace and alysanne are 18, aemond is 20) and alysanne referrs to daemon as her father but hes not. also i imagine a young jodie comer as alysanne but u can imagine whoever u want! and everything that is written in cursive is a flashback an anything that is only in bold is alysanne's thoughts!! pls tell me what u guys think

masterlist

⊱ ───────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ───────── ⊰

"Shh! We need to be quiet!"

Aemond tried to look at her as sternly as possible but couldn't hold on to his giggle as she looked at him as apologetically and sweetly as she could. Before he could think any longer about how beautiful she looked as only the fire in the dungeons illuminated her face, he grabbed her hand and went further down the stairs to the underground room where the skull of Balerion the Black Dread was kept.

Alysanne gasped at the sight and was sure she had never seen a head this big from the dragons that lived still. She was small, a growing girl of four and ten and was definitely dwarfed even more as she stood in front of the skull of a creature that lived not too long ago.

"What a huge skull... He must have crushed people just by laying his head on them! Do you think Vhagar will be so big too one day?"

Aemond smiled at her and cupped her cheek with one hand, softly brushing his thumb over her temple.

"I know she will. And when she is that big, you will be in the skies with her, with me. Right by my side where you belong."

Alysanne smiled shyly, her cheeks red from how sweetly he was holding her and looking at her. She had liked Aemond for so long even though their families were so opposed to each other. To their luck, her grandfather, King Viserys announced on Aemond's eight nameday that they would be betrothed and no one else was delighted except the two of them. She remembered her mother pleading with her father to still wait and to not rush into betrothals and Queen Alicent had said the same but the King would hear none of it. He saw how the two of them spent most of their time with each other after all.

Aemond was closer to her now, his breath on her lips, his hand going from her cheek to holding the back of her head in place. His forehead found its place on hers and even though he had only one eye, it stared at her in intensity and adoration.

"You look beautiful like this... Just the fire that gives me a sight of your incredible, gorgeous face. How do I deserve a betrothed like you? Tell me, what Gods did I please for you to be mine?"

She blushed even more at his words, so sweet and unrelenting in making her see that she was the most beautiful woman that ever lived, in his eyes. She brought up her hand to his cheek, the one that bared his scar. She softly admired how brave it made him look, how it proved that he was the bravest warrior of them all with the scar to prove it.

"You deserve it by simply being you, Aemond. I am yours and you are mine and in due time, we will marry and it will be official. I will be yours as you are mine, now and always."

His heart clenched at her words and he pressed the softest of kisses on her lips, his touch as gentle as if he was holding a flower... His little flower, forever his.

Alysanne's heart feels as it's ripped apart in two. She is confused, she is angry, she is sad but does not know at what or whom. The gods are playing tricks on us, she thinks as she helps her mother in wrapping up her dead little sister. Cruel and selfish tricks.

It does not make sense to her, none of it. Her grandsire dies, the Greens crown a usurper and tell everyone a lie, that the King had wished for Aegon to be King in his last breath and Alysanne and her family sit at Dragonstone, unbeknownst of the horrors that were going on in the capital. She does not understand it, none of it. Does not understand why Aemond is letting them do this, letting them crown anyone else other than her mother... He could never marry Alysanne like this.

Her hands are covered in blood, in her dead sister's and mother's from the wrapping. She does not wish to wash it off, wants to keep it on her hands, fly to King's Landing at this moment and present her bloodied hands to the Queen Dowager and her father. Look at what you have done, she wants to scream. She wants to take the bundled up baby on the table and present it to them, make the bitch of a Queen look at it. Look at how you've killed my sister. My little Visenya.

"Alysanne." She hears her mother's voice clear up the fog of anger in her mind and wonders how many times she had called her already. The princess of eight and ten looks up at her mother and sees the grief and sorrow in her eyes but mostly concern. "My darling, do not let your anger take you over again, it is unneeded at this moment. Come, wash the blood of. We need to... do the burning."

"I do not wish to wash my blood off, mother. I want to smear it in her face and tell her that she deserves death for what she has done. Letting grandsire rot in his place for days before telling anyone he was even dead, killing my sister in cold blood and putting Aegon on the throne. She will pay for this... she will."

Rhaenyra knows she can say nothing to sway her mind at the moment, her only daughter's bloodlust and want for revenge mirroring something that Daemon would probably be proud of. She wonders when this happened, wonders when her own daughter became such a hardened woman, when the love she had for her family turned into protectiveness and when that turned into anger. No one except for Rhaenyra knows that everything Alysanne does is out of love for her family, not even Jacaerys who is the girl's own twin realizes this. She wonders if that anger will be reflected at Aemond too, the only person she holds any love for outside of her family. Alysanne has not uttered a single word of him ever since Rhaenys told them of what had happened.

Alysanne listens to her all the same because she could not be mad at her mother, the woman who loves her so much and lost everything. She may be a bloodthirsty, angry woman but she is still her mother's child, nothing changes that, ever. So she washes the blood off of herself, gets dressed in an all black dress and attends her sister's funeral. She stands next to her brothers and her face remains stone cold but a few tears slip past her cheeks as her sister's tiny, small body burns. She has to breathe in and out through her nose to control her emotions from overboiling and does not know what would happen if she could not control herself.

They stole my mother's crown and her throne. They stole her and my brother's birthright. They stole me of my sweet sister... And for that, the Hightowers will burn, she thinks. Otto, Alicent, Aegon. Otto, Alicent, Aegon. Otto, Alicent, Aegon.

She repeats their names in her head. She would not kill Helaena, the sister wife of the usurper had done no harm to her or her family, just like Aegon's children.

She does not think of Aemond, of what will happen to him, of what she will do about him... or what her father will do to him. She wonders if he's trying to find an excuse in his head for betraying her like this, if he tells himself that him and his brother will make sure her family will be gone before long and force her to marry him... But that is not Aemond's way.

She can not think of Aemond. She does not want to think of Aemond. She still loves Aemond.

They stood on opposing sides of the throne room, so close yet so far away. Aemond studied her closely, how much taller she had grown, how her beauty could not match that of a single lady in the Seven Kingdoms. The sun was she to him, feeling as if he could stand and live with her in his presence. The air was she to him, needing her to breathe and to calm himself down when his mind was plagued by his demons once more. Life was she to him, something worth fighting for and the sole reason he put up with her rather annoying family.

Alysanne could tell that her betrothed had eyes for no one but her, he was not listening to the Hand when he sat the throne, nor did he look away from her when the King marched up to his throne and settled matters. She only stole a few glances at him but had to hide her smile at the way he did not stop staring at her all the same. To him, none of what was happening mattered... He only cared about meeting his lovely betrothed again.

To her however, it was not so unimportant. Her brother's legitimacy was being questioned and ever since the accident at Driftmark where her brother had taken her betrothed's eye, tensions were as high as ever between the two families. She remembered that night, when she was called upon from her bed and had to look at her brothers' bloodied faces and wondered how foolish they could have been to do something like that. If she thought back on it, it was probably the moment that made her into the cold, hardened woman that she became over the years, realizing that no one but her family would be there for her, care for her and protect her... and she strived to do the same for them.

Aemond only ripped his eyes away from her when Daemon sliced Dark Sister through Vaemond, a move that shocked most people in the throne room. She was glad to see him gone and dead for calling her brothers bastards and her mother a whore... he deserved it.

Everyone in the throne room left as the matter was settled. Lucerys would inherit Driftmark as was his birthright and the young princess was glad of it because she would not have the Hightower snakes get their way, no matter what it was.

She had been told that the King had requested a dinner with the entire family and she wondered how well that would pass but Alysanne got ready for it nonetheless. She wore a beautiful black and red gown, accentuated with the dragon sigil of her mother's house that she had always been proud of. After the handmaidens had left, there was a knock on the door and when she turned around, it was Aemond entering through the door.

She looked at him with wide eyes and walked up to him, pulling him into the room by his arm and closing the doors before anyone else could see him. Her mind was reeling from where she had touched Aemond's skin and she hoped that the effect he had on her was not so apparent to him as she turned around. But Aemond clearly did not care for not showing his feelings as he caged her against the door, so close to her again like the first and last time they kissed. His hand came up to hold her chin and made her look up at him and oh, how the touch burned under his gentle fingers.

"Tell me, my little flower, has anything changed between us?" Alysanne knew that he did not wish to show his insecurity to her but it was reflected in his voice all the same, sounding scared of her feelings not being the same as they were before. She knew that he still very clearly felt just like four years ago when they had last seen each other, his love just as she always knew it... Resistant, powerful and undying.

"Well, I have changed in the years since we last met. I am a woman grown now, did you know? My nameday was a few moons ago. I have grown colder, harder and stronger in every way. It may be that even my heart has turned to ice for I do not wish for anyone in my company except the people I love." Alysanne leaned closer to him, their lips almost touching, the distance between them able to be closed in less than a second.

"But whatever part of my heart holds it's love for you has clearly not turned into ice... because I look at you and see you standing in front of me so closely, see you looking at me like you'll never love someone like you'll love me. And I realize that yes, I do love you still, have loved you for so many years and might never love anyone else except for you. I do not believe I could ever be with another man."

Aemond did not show it but she saw the relief take over his body, his shoulders releasing it's tension and he sighed deeply, closed his eye and leaned his forehead against hers. She placed a small, featherlight kiss on his lips and furrowed her eyebrows at how little it did to satisfy her. She tried to press her lips to his again but he held her back with a thumb on her lips and his eye opened again, looking at her with hunger and resistance.

"I wish to kiss you until you are breathless and beg me for more but we can not, my love. If we do, I could not stop and control myself from doing something so sinful that would have our mothers marry us swiftly in the sept tomorrow. Which of course, I would not oppose to but I shall not risk things with you. I want to do it properly, have a feast for us and have everyone in Westeros celebrate our union. With you, I will do things right. You deserve no less, my dragon."

Alysanne hated how her heart swelled at his words, hated how he spoke so gently and softly with her like he had when they were children. When she was a different woman, a girl still, she would have embraced and loved the way he made her feel and how he confessed his love for her and his wish to marry. But as it was, Alysanne was a changed woman and hated that she had so long ago fallen for a man that she was supposed to hate... One day, war would break out and they would be on opposite sides.

She did not have to think about it much longer as Aemond had to leave to get ready for the dinner himself. He pressed a small kiss to her lips that stirred things in her heart that she could not explain, a turmoil of emotions in her heart and mind after every word and every kiss of his lips. She composed herself and decided to visit her sickly grandsire since he had asked her to come see him before they would have dinner when she was there with her mother, father and siblings this morning.

Alysanne always had a special bond with King Viserys. It was widely known that Rhaenyra was his favorite child and that he loved her very dearly and therefore loved her grandchildren as well. When he held Jacaerys and Alysanne for the first time in his arms, he cried and blessed them both, her mother had told her. When she was a child and still lived in the Red Keep, she had often played with him, let him help her learn to read and write. It pained her to see him so weak and in pain but she would still go to see him, simply because she loved him so dearly.

She entered his chambers just as he had seemingly gotten ready dressing with the help of maids and servants. He seemed clearer in his state of mind than he was before, a crooked smile on his lips as he saw her entering. The maids and servants left them and Alysanne sat down next to her grandsire in front of the fire place. He looked at her lovingly and gently grabbed her hand, his grip weak but still full of adoration for his oldest granddaughter.

"My dearest Alysanne, my pride and joy. I know they say that we should not pick favorites, in children or grandchildren... but I think you know that I have loved you so much since you were placed in my arms, as if it was Rhaenyra put in my arms all over again. Because I love you so dearly, I need to ask you this and want to give you a choice, something that I sadly could not do for Rhaenyra."

The King spoke slowly but he still commanded presence even in his weakly state. Alysanne wanted to cry at how he looked, so breakable and ill, as if he could die at this very moment but she continued to listen to him attentively. He looked up with the one eye that was visible and she saw all the love he held for her, just like when she was a little girl.

"Alysanne, please be truthful when you answer me this. Do you love Aemond?"

Alysanne's breath hitched at the question and she felt a lump so heavy in her throat that the words would not come out at first. She knew that the only reason for his question was to possibly confirm a future marriage and maybe even set a loose date for a wedding and knew that if she said no, her grandfather would not hesitate in calling the marriage off. It was his hope for Alysanne to marry Aemond so that an inevitable conflict in the future could be avoided... besides that, Aemond had demanded since Alysanne's most recent nameday to plan the wedding. She knew that if she said no, her parents and brothers would be more than pleased and happy about it. She knew that if she said no, she could avoid having to live with the awful, other side of her family. She knew that if she said no, she would avoid the inner turmoil inside her that told her that she could not love, that she was too cold and unloving for marriage.

"Yes."

Alysanne knew of the dangers that would come if she said yes. She did it anyway.

Alysanne had claimed the Cannibal at the mere age of four and ten to everyone's great surprise. When her, Jace and her younger siblings were born, they had all received dragon eggs from Syrax as their mother wanted her children to have a lifelong bond with their dragons as well. Jace, Luke and Joffrey's eggs all hatched and all three of them, respectively, had Vermax, Arrax and Tyraxes as their bonded dragons. Alysanne's egg however had turned into stone when she was still a babe and in that entire time, Syrax did not hatch more eggs for the young princess to claim.

To be truthful, Alysanne did not care much for having a dragon. The bond and the care for a dragon was not something she deemed herself to have and having three brothers who rode dragons was surely enough in the family. However, after the incident at Driftmark, Alysanne changed her mind about it. She loved Aemond back then, knew he would not hurt her but him having Vhagar would make things difficult for her in the future, she knew that.

She had thought about claiming Sea Smoke whilst she was still at Driftmark then but knew that she needed a dragon that would match Vhagar not just in fiercness but in size. So when she was back at Dragonstone, she tried her luck first with Silverwing, the dragon that ironically belonged to her namesake once before and followed the advice of the Dragonkeepers at Dragonstone. Alysanne had tried to claim her in a duration of many moons but the Dragonkeepers deemed it a hopeless cause. She tried Vermithor next, the largest unclaimed dragon that had been ridden before by the Old King, Jaehaerys I. She tried to claim him for almost a year, sang to him in Valyrian as he liked it, didn't show her fear in front of him. The Dragonkeepers decided to observe her the last time that she went to tell her what she was doing wrong.

"You are too fierce for them, my princess. Dragons can feel our emotions, our feelings and our true ambitions and they bond with whoever they match best with. And I'm sorry to say it, my princess but you are simply too angry for them, even for Vermithor."

She was frustrated at that and wondered how she was ever supposed to have a dragon when she remembered the three wild dragons that still resided on Dragonstone that were never claimed by anyone. Surely, I must be angry enough for them, she thinks. One of them has to be as hateful and angry as me.

The first two wild dragons that she came across in the more abandoned areas of Dragonstone, Grey Ghost and Sheepstealer fled her as soon as she came closer, there was no real chance at getting close to them which disappointed her greatly. She was in all seriousness not considering to approach the Cannibal so she just wanted to leave the dragon be that was feasting on a poor animal just in her line of sight. The beast however had other plans for her, letting off of the dead animal and focusing on her and coming closer at a speed that she did not expect. He stopped right in front of her and his eyes studied her closely, circling her from left to right as if asessing if she was worth to be eaten. She was not scared however and only looked him in his eyes bravely. After a few more minutes, he stopped and gave her a nudge with its big head. From that day on, she understood what was meant with that bond, knew that he had assessed her and let her claim him because she matched his anger

The Cannibal was overall the second largest dragon that still lived but the size difference between this dragon and Vhagar was so small that most people assumed that they were the same size. Besides, the Cannibal was suprisingly quick, in the sky and on the ground which was an advantage against Vhagar who, due to her oldness, had become rather slow.

Neverthless, it was a miracle that the beast had accepted Alysanne as it's first ever rider, Alysanne, who was only four and ten and still a tiny girl, rode the second largest dragon in the world and a wild dragon at that, the first one to tame it. She was of course scolded greatly for it by her mother but Daemon could only look at her proudly.

It was ironic, really. Alysanne was scolded all night by her mother who kept asking her why she did it, why she was so obsessed with having a dragon, one that was impossible to claim and terrifying as well. To prepare for war, she thought. To prepare for a war to defend you and my family. A war I have been preparing for since I was a child.

Holding council is truly a dreadful thing. Counting out who would support their side, who would hold honor their oaths given to her mother many years ago and which dragons could fight for their side.

"My prince, we may be in the lead with dragons but Prince Aemond still possesses the largest dragon alive. It will be a hard task to defeat Vhagar." The other lords around the table seem to agree and she cuts Daemon off before he can reply.

"Leave Vhagar to me, my lord. I'm sure that me and Cannibal can handle her." The table falls into silence at that and she sees from the corners of her eye that her mother and father are not agreed on that statement. The silence is interrupted by Ser Erryk who informs the council that a ship from the Greens had been seen on the shores and the council room is quickly cleared, leaving only Alysanne, Jace and Luke in the room.

She continues to assess the table and what allies they have when Luke places his hand on hers on the table. She looks over at him and sees that he looks concerned for her, his hand soft and warm on hers and so small. She pulls her hand out and places it on top of his, softly brushing her thumb over his. Sadly, her change in personality had also affected her relationships with her brothers. She spent so much time training Cannibal for possible fights with other dragons and herself spent more time into training with a sword as well. Still, she never acts cold towards them, never lashes her anger out at them because she lives for them and for the affection and love she receives from them. Luke still looks concerned but doesn't voice his worries. Instead, Jace does.

"Alysanne... If you mean to 'take care' of Vhagar, you mean to kill her... But for that, you will need to kill Aemond too."

She knew that it was exactly what all the lords around the table had questioned because Aemond's affections and love for his long time betrothed were so well known by everyone in the realm. She sighs deeply and knows deep down in her heart that it rebels at the thought of having to kill her one true love, the one man she loves. She hides her turmoil and problems under a practiced mask and puts on a smile that fools Luke and almost would have fooled Jacaerys. She softly grabs his hand and holds it tightly, needing to feel her twins' presence next to her.

"Don't worry about me, brothers. We aren't officially at war yet but when it comes to it, I will do what I must to defend us and to fight for our mother's and your birthright."

"I may not live for much longer... but I wish for one last thing before I might leave this earth forever." The King looks at Aemond and then at Alysanne at the dinner table with something that she assumed was a smile on his face. She realized then that this was it, that she had sealed her fate forever with the words she had uttered just hours ago in his chambers... She just didn't know that it would happen so soon.

"To mend the estrangement between our families, I have decided that Prince Aemond and Princess Alysanne shall be married to each other swiftly and soon, possibly after Rhaenyra gives birth. Then, we will celebrate the biggest wedding the Seven Kingdoms have ever seen. Then the gods can happily take me away."

The news of the wedding was a shock for everyone at the table and Alysanne swallowed the lump that had formed in her throat for she could feel the stares from both sides. Pretty much everyone either forgot the betrothal or opted to ignore it, knowing it still existed but not truly thinking of what would further happen with it. So to hear the King's words made both of her parents look at her in confusion and shock and Jace was almost uncontrollable with anger, wanting to punch the one eyed Prince right in his face. Before anything further could escalate, Aemond stood up with his cup in his hand, looking right at Alysanne who only had her cold gaze on the table.

"I wish to toast to my betrothed and soon enough, my wife. It has been twelve years since we were engaged and throughout our shared youth, you didn't fail to make me fall in love with you. Every time that I have seen you since only further proves that my love for you never dwindled or disappeared but simply resurfaced when I saw your evergrowing beauty through the years. I have loved you for years and will continue to love you until my dying breath. To You, my love."

Even though Alysanne felt sick at the looks that her family was giving her, she still had a tiny smile on her face and looked at Aemond lovingly, unable to hold her stoic, cold expression any longer. He smiled at her, genuinely and she wished he didn't.

Nothing in this world was more difficult for Alysanne than loving Aemond Targaryen.

Her father is furious as he comes back from their meeting with Otto Hightower, her mother as unreadable as ever. Alysanne thinks it was a good idea that she did not come for she would have ripped him apart, whether her mother commanded otherwise or not. The Council is only reconvened for a few moments before everyone is told to leave the room except for Alysanne, Jacaerys and Lucerys. The oldest daughter watches Daemon walk up and down the fireplace as he thinks hard about something she does not know. Her mother is across from her on the other side of the table, her brothers are next to her.

"Otto Hightower also mentioned your promised betrothal to Aemond. He said that we should go through with it and that it would mend the drift between our families and prevent war."

Alysanne's mind reels as she thinks about those words and wonders if a simple marriage between a second son and an eldest daughter would really mend anything... her mind immediately answers her, clear and aggressive. She does not believe she can marry Aemond with how he had betrayed her. Suddenly, Daemon turns around and looks at Alysanne, almost menacingly.

"If you had never said a single word to my brother no one would care for this stupid betrothal anymore. But you had to go through with it, didn't you? Why, because you love Aemond so much? Because you wanted to be with him? I am happy to know that you never will. You were stupid to think that you could ever marry him when you know the positions our families stand at. I don't know if you even care about your family when you were willing to marry your own enemy."

His fury is one that she had not ever seen directed at her and his words sting, just like he wants them to. Daemon has been a father to Alysanne ever since he had married her mother and he had never said anything so vile and hurtful to her. Her mother looks at him in a certain way that is silently trying to tell him to stop, to tone it down but he does not listen and keeps staring at her with anger that makes her furious in return.

"Yes, I know it was stupid, of course I knew! I knew what could happen, what the dangers were to wanting to marry him but believe it or not, at some point, I did love him. It was stupid and I let him love me and that was even stupider. But don't ever tell me that I do not care for this family, Daemon. Do not act as if that is true when you know it isn't."

"How would I know? You can not even outright say that you will kill him when you eventually face him and Vhagar with Cannibal! No, I do not believe you care for your family, Alysanne, not with the way you behave."

She sees her mother's mouth form words, something that looks like she's saying stop but it is too late for Alysanne is as angry and mad as anyone could ever be. She's hurt, she's sad, she's furious. In this moment, she feels like driving a sword through Daemon's chest.

"You liar! I have always cared for my family! Every single moment of my life, I have wanted to protect my family! Ever since Aemond lost his eye at Driftmark I have known and understood the consequences of the separation between our families. Why do you think I wanted a dragon the moment we got back? Why do you think I spent two years trying to claim and bond to dragons? Why do you think that, out of all the wild dragons, I claimed Cannibal? Because I knew none of the other ones stood a chance against Vhagar! Why do you think I have been obsessed with learning how to fight with a sword? Why do you think I always worry about where my brothers and sisters are? Because I have been preparing for this war since I was a child! I have been scared of it, of what would happen to my family and about what would happen to Aemond, yes, I worried over him because I love him. But don't ever tell me that I do not care for my family when I know deep down in my heart that I would kill Aemond the moment I get my hands on him. Don't ever make assumptions and accusations like that ever again, Daemon."

Alysanne is screaming at him in fury and her hands are shaking from how angry she feels. She starts crying at some point too but she does not care and later on realizes that confessing all her insecurities and worries to her family is an awful thing. Her grip on the table makes her feel like it will break apart soon and she feels like she will break apart in a similar way. She knows her brothers are staring at her in shock next to her, her mother looks at her with concern and her father remains unreadable. Before anything else can be said, she storms away from the painted table and out of the room, furiously wiping her tears away as if they were poison to her.

She hears her mother calling after her but no one follows her which she deems as good. It's good, she should be alone. She loves to be alone. She needs to be alone. She does not want to be alone.

Anger and sadness rage inside her in a tandem and she keeps having to stop herself from throwing a punch at the wall just so she would be rid of this agonizing feeling. She hears a distant roar that echoes out, Cannibal feeling her emotions through the bond and most likely trying to pick a fight with one of the other dragons now. With this fury inside her and Cannibal, she thinks she could burn King's Landing down at this very moment.

She walks back to her chambers quickly to prevent herself from actually going to Cannibal's nest and take off with him. Once she is inside her room, she practices the calming breathing techniques that the Maestar had taught her. Breathe in, hold, breathe out. Breathe in, hold, breathe out.

She feels like it works although she is never so sure because her rage never truly leaves her, only retreats and waits to come back in the worst possible times. She walks around in her room, closing her eyes and wills herself to be normal, be normal, be fucking normal.

She hears the door open behind her and it's Jace. She does not say anything as he comes closer to her and stops right in front of her, his face etched in concern and love. She wonders what he possibly could love about her. He closes the distance between them and takes her in his arms, holding her close and hugging her tightly like he used to when they were small. She hugs him back and wonders how long it has been since she hugged her own twin because her heart aches at how much she missed this. Her face is buried in his neck and she smells his scent on him, undeniably her twin. She wishes she would cry in his arms and tell him that she's sorry but she doesn't.

He breaks away from their hug and stares into her eyes. She wonders if he can see how broken she truly is, how incredibly awful and terrible she is at her core but she does not think of it, not now. Maybe in the dead of the night under the covers when she can cry herself to sleep. She takes Jacaerys's face into her hands and hopes to make him understand how she feels.

"Everything I have done... Claiming Cannibal, learning how to fight, closing myself off to anyone who is not my family... I have done this for mother and for her birthright because I knew that someday, we would go to war and have to fight for it and we have arrived at that day. But I want you to know that by extension, I do not only do this for mother but for you too. I believe in you, Jacaerys. Your reign over the Kingdom will be peaceful and good because you are a kind man and have learned all your life how to rule, unlike Aegon. I will breathe, live and die to put mother and you on the Iron Throne. I swear by this, nothing will ever change that, not even Aemond."

Alysanne sees his eyes gather with tears and she wonders if her brother knows that she would really do anything for him to have his birthright, which was promised to him all his life. His hands hold her wrists and his tears fall as if a waterfall had opened and she tries to control her emotions so she won't cry. He is taller than her but she goes up on her toes and plants a soft kiss on his forehead and wipes the tears from his face. She holds onto him so dearly, so tightly because she's scared of losing him, scared of what will happen during the war. People die so quickly and easily and her heart aches at the thought of having to lose a single person in her family... Mother, Father, Jace, Luke, Joffrey, Baela, Rhaena, Aegon, Viserys. Nothing can happen to them. Nothing, not ever.

"I will make sure you will sit on the throne after our mother, trust this, Jace. I will forever be by your side."

"I know you are worried about our families but please, set it aside for now. I just want to be with you and not worry about their stupid problems for once."

Alysanne continued to stare into the fireplace, hoping for an answer to her worries and fears. She basked in the closeness she was enjoying with Aemond, his arm around her and her head on his shoulder, leaning onto him. She played with the string of his shirt as she contemplated on anything and everything, whatever that was.

"The reason I worry is because they hate each other. I don't know how this will work out... But at least it is set in stone now. Only a few moons until we are to be married... It doesn't feel real."

His hand was so gentle as it went through her hair, so loving and caring, attributes that no one would ever think of Aemond. No one but Alysanne. She wondered if she was cursed for it in the end, if her love for Aemond would be ill-placed and she wanted to forget about it just now. She was in the arms of the man she loved, a man she maybe should not be marrying but she could worry about that later. She broke herself away from her cozy place only to sit on his lap, her legs on either side of his body and she looked at him with nothing but love. He looked down at where Alysanne was sitting on his thigh and looked back up again, the smallest smile on his lips.

Alysanne reached up and took the eyepatch off to reveal the beautiful blue sapphire that was in the place of his eye. She brushed over his scarred cheek and studied his hidden eye closely, Aemond was not phased by this in any way. He liked that Alysanne did not feel uncomfortable about seeing him without the eyepatch and his heart clenched once more at how carefully she was touching him. She was everything to him, his beautiful Alysanne, his perfect girl, the sun to his moon. He wished to have her in his arms forever like this. She studied the years old scar as if it would rip open and tell her all of Aemond's secrets and thoughts.

"Don't worry. I'll get back at your brother for this one day."

She glared at him but didn't say anything since he laughed right after and it made her heart skip. He brushed a lock of her hair behind her ear and held one side of her face with his hand. He knew that many thought of her as a brute, cold woman but she was never like that to him, always so soft and gentle and he wished he could keep her right here forever, in his arms, until the world crashed and burned around them.

He knew it would not bother them. They would be happy together, for the rest of their days.

Alysanne hates it, she lets everyone know by making a show of protesting it. She tells her mother that it's foolish to send Jacaerys and Lucerys away to be messengers, that the ravens would be enough, that she could go to the Vale, Winterfell and Storm's End to deliver the messages on Cannibal. Her mother immediately renounces that idea, telling her that sending Cannibal and her would send the wrong message to these lords. She would remain at Dragonstone with her and father to continue plans and be present at the council.

The nervousness strikes her, her worry for her brothers immense and unrelenting. She stands by their dragons as they swear to not act as warriors on their journeys but as messengers. Alysanne knows they will be fine because they have to be. They have no other choice but to come back to her safe and sound.

They leave mother with one last hug and approach her now as they are about to fly off. She is clearly worried and nervous as they come closer and Jace is the first to hug her, holding her close just like last time. She closes her eyes at how familiar it feels to be held by him and presses him close. She leaves a small kiss on his cheek before they part and she holds onto his shoulders, wondering if she can keep him here if she holds on strongly enough. He sees the worry in his twin's eyes and squeezes her shoulder.

"I will come back, sister, do not worry."

Alysanne thinks he's foolish for telling her not to worry but lets him leap onto Vermax either way. She is then faced with Luke who looks up at her with wide, scared eyes from the nest of brown locks on his head. Alysanne's heart hurts at how small he looks and she wants to pick him up like she used to when they were younger and hide him in the castle, wrap him in a blanket and never let him see the horrors of the world. He is almost as tall as her and it frightens her that her younger brother is growing up so quickly. She never gave him permission for that. She cups his small face in her hands and wants to cry at how much more it dwarfs him, so small and yet so brave to fly to Storm's End all on his own.

"My little brother, I'll miss you but you'll be back in no time anyway. Either way, be careful. I wish I could go instead but maybe I can secretly follow after you on Cannibal."

Luke lets out a small laugh at that and smiles at her, his nervousness not so bad now. "I think mother would kill you if you did."

Alysanne smiles at that too and agrees. She ruffles his pretty locks and leans down to be closer to him and kisses his forehead as gently as ever. He had always loved when his elder sister was sweet to him, always felt safe and secure with her. Luke then turns to approach his dragon but comes running back just a few seconds later and hugs Alysanne tightly.

"Don't blame yourself for Aemond. It's alright for you to love him, you can't choose over it but please don't blame yourself, sister. I know what you have done for us and I'm happy that you're my sister and protect me from everything. I love you, Alysanne."

The princess is startled by his words but she smiles at them nonetheless, her heart bursting at how sweet her brother is. Her smart boy, her little Luke.

"I love you too, sweet boy. Don't worry about me, you make sure that you come back safely to me."

My dearest Alysanne,

it has been only a day since you left but I miss you so terribly already. I hope you arrive safely at Dragonstone and think of me as much as I think of you. Soon we will be wed and everyone will see that we are bound and meant to be together, in the eyes of god and men.

It almost pains me physically to not have you by my side now, to hold you close to me and to let you see me as I am. There is no one in the Seven Kingdoms that I have ever met that has made me feel like you do. There is no one in the Known World, living or dead, that will ever enthrall me like you. I could not explain it, can not tell you why I love you so much, just that I do. I am yours and you are mine until the end of our days. I wish to get on Vhagar and fly after you and Cannibal to Dragonstone just so I can be with you, hold your hands, your face, tell you that my heart desires no one but you and that you will forever have me trapped, that I chase you like the moon chases the sun, forever.

I hope to meet up at our spot soon. The little island will always be there and I will be there too, waiting for you.

I love you. Now and always.

Forever yours, Aemond

She hates him. Now and always.

She doesn't believe it when she's told, only shakes her head when her mother comes into her room, tears all over her face. She tells him that Lucerys had died, attacked by another dragon. Her mother is silent when Alysanne asks which dragon and who it was. Did it matter? She does not believe her anyway because it's not true. Lucerys is still alive, just on his way back from Storm's End.

She's completely still as her mother tells her that it was Vhagar who had attacked and killed him. She doesn't move, doesn't breathe, doesn't see anything but red. She did not believe it because who would hurt her Luke like this? Who? Her sweet little brother who was only a child, a little boy still so young and unaware of the horrors of war. But now she believes it because she sees the way her mother continues to sob and cry.

Alysanne believes it now.

I'll get back at your brother for this one day.

A loud dragon roar is heard outside, Cannibal is so loud that it almost deafens her. It must have been heard to King's Landing.

Good, she thinks. Let them hear the roar of a dragon.

She wants to throw the chair she leans on at the wall, wants to take her sword and break her bed with it, wants to scream and pull her hair and bash her head on the ground and punch herself and punch her fist at the wall until it breaks-

She feels arms envelop her and it's her mother that had been crying so bitterly at the loss of her son, holding her close, so close because she's scared of losing her. Alysanne's mind swallows her anger automatically with her mother so close in her vicinity. She can not be violent towards her mother, she would rather die. Maybe her mother senses that she's feeling awful and that she wants to hurt herself to make the pain go away and hugs her so she won't. Alysanne doesn't know. She holds onto her mother either way, like a child she wails in her arms and screams for him. She screams for Lucerys to come back, she doesn't understand why he's not coming and running to her at her distress, doesn't understand that the little brother she held in her arms and kissed on his forehead just hours ago was dead.

The Gods play tricks on her indeed.

Her mother leaves her alone a little while later at her request and Alysanne goes to Lucerys' room because maybe he'll be hiding somewhere, waiting for Alysanne to find him. She looks around the room and wonders how it can suddenly feel so empty, so void as if no one lived here anymore. She takes a few more steps into the room, looks at the strewn and messy books on his study table and remembers that she told him once to keep his mess organized. He never listened to her.

He'll never listen to her ever again.

Her eyes go over his bed and she spots a small plush toy that she knows all too well. She approaches the bed and takes it in her hands, almost feeling like it will dissolve when she picks it up. She had made it for him, years ago when she still had lessons with a septa, she learned how to make these small plush toys. When she was young, she had made one for each of her brothers and made them look like their dragons. She sits there with a toy version of Arrax and her heart hurts, screams, burns like a wildfire. Their bodies are gone, she realizes. Lucerys and Arrax are both lost somewhere in the sea. They can not even be burned.

Another loud, angry roar is heard from Cannibal. She's never heard him sound this angry.

She's never been this angry.

She puts the plush toy back and swiftly walks out of the room, her face stone cold as she marches to her room. All she takes is her sword and small dagger, nothing to protect her from the cold.

Good, she thinks. I shall feel what Lucerys felt when he died. Cold, scared and frightened.

She passes guards as she makes her way outside but they pay her no mind and pass by her quickly because they are scared of Cannibal's roars and know that he is only so loud because of her anger. Her dragon is already perched right outside of the gates. He looks as black and dreadful and menacing as ever, his roars still sounding all over Dragonstone. The guards that stand outside are terrified, not willing to get any closer to him but Alysanne does not care. She approaches him and climbs onto his back, the huge dragon is not at all phased by this.

As soon as she is in her saddle the dragon shouts out another menacing roar and takes off, not having to listen to his rider's orders. Alysanne believes he can read her mind and knows where to go without her having to say anything. She loves him for it.

It's a short flight to the island that they called theirs, somewhere in the middle in between King's Landing and Dragonstone. It was just large enough for Vhagar and Cannibal to reside on and for Aemond and Alysanne to have time for themselves when they could.

Yes, she thinks. We'll be by ourselves with no one to hear his or Vhagar's screams and roars.

She does not know for sure if he is there but behold the gods, he is. She spots the large dragon figure on the island and a figure of white long hair in black clothes sitting on the beach. His head is downcast when she comes closer but he does not raise his head even though Cannibal is more than loud. He lands her a safe distance away from Vhagar, the older dragon staying at her spot with her snout next to Aemond. Alysanne gets off of Cannibal and approaches Aemond who is crying into his hands. She doesn't concern herself with it, only pulls her sword out towards him and the sound of the metal finally makes him turn his head. He looks horrified at who's standing in front of him but Alysanne remains cold, stoic, hard. His tear streaked face and his tired, sorrowful expression do not hurt her.

He is frantic to come closer and she lets him but only until the tip of her sword touches his chest. He looks at her beggingly but she only shakes her head. He feels cold and awful at the empty eyes she's looking at him with and it seems to terrify him that she held no love for him in her eyes. Before he can say anything, she cuts him off.

"I thought about killing Aegon first, you know? An eye for an eye, a brother for a brother. That's what all this was about after all. But then I realized that you do not love Aegon nearly as much as I love Lucerys. In fact, if I killed him, you would be better off since the crown would fall to you, his children are still so little after all. Then I thought and thought about whose death would pain you as much as Luke's pains me... That's why I thought of killing myself in front of you."

Aemond looks horrified at her words and does not believe that this is really his Alysanne. He had never, ever felt any of the anger or animosity she held inside of her directed to him so this hurts him deeply, cuts his heart in half so painfully. He shakes his head at her word and falls on his knees, powerless and defeated by the murder he had done and by the hatred of the woman he loves.

"Please, Alysanne, I beg you, do not hurt yourself. Please, I'm sorry, I swear it was an accident. I lost control of Vhagar, I didn't mean to do it! I never wanted to kill him, I just wanted his eye! Please, you have to believe me, please, I will do anything for you, please don't hate me."

Aemond sobs and cries like she did earlier and it satisfies her to know that he is in pain. She does not think that he deserves to cry like this just because she wants to hurt him. She lost a brother, he only lost his love. Unfortunately however, she still loves him and a small part of her is in pain at seeing him so distraught and hysterical. She wants to hold him, comfort him, hug him...

And then she remembers that Luke is dead. And all those feelings are gone immediately.

"Don't worry, I won't kill myself. I still have a war to win, a mother to put on a throne, a birthright to restore for my brother. My family needs me and Cannibal so no, I can not give myself the pleasure of killing myself for your misery." Alysanne then smiles, a tiny smile but it is so scaring and horrifying that Aemond shivers from where he's looking up to her.

"But I'm happy that you mention Vhagar. I was going to kill her anyway for killing Luke and Arrax but now, I want you to watch her die. I want you to watch me take away the one only thing that has ever given you power in your life and want you to feel what it's like to lose everything."

Aemond only looks at her in disbelief and horror and watches as if he is trapped in his body as Alysanne commands for Cannibal to attack and kill. Vhagar is still lazily lying there, clearly exhausted from the turmoil of emotions her rider is feeling. Because of this, she is weak and her already old state makes her slow to move. It's almost funny that Cannibal is almost as old as her but so much quicker and more brutal. Even Aemond had once admitted that Cannibal was a better war dragon than Vhagar, simply because he was large but because of his long body, still quick to move. Besides, wild dragons are truly ruthless creatures, taking whatever they want and being used to much more brutally by themselves and without a rider.

Alysanne smiles as Cannibal bites the old dragon's tail and simply rips it off, tossing it on the beach next to him, never one to waste his food. Vhagar roars out but it's weak, lame and it takes a long time for her to move, so long that Cannibal is already bursting his massive fire at the old creature. The pain from the fire only makes it worse for the she-dragon and just as Vhagar is about to attack and spew fire of her own, Cannibal grips his teeth around her neck. They struggle back and forth for a few seconds and Alysanne sees the blood drip from Vhagar's neck. Eventually, Cannibal bites all around her neck completely and the dragon's head slices slowly to the ground, making a wet, disgusting sound as it lands on the sand. The huge body of the dragon sacks down in itself and Cannibal begins to feast on her carcass. He will have plenty of food for at least a week.

Alysanne turns back to Aemond who had just watched in horror this whole time, did not say a single word or command Vhagar to attack back. His mouth is open in shock and tears fall down his face as he watches Cannibal feast on his dragon. This is what it feels like, Alysanne thinks. You should feel even more.

Aemond turns back to her and his expression is unchanged, only shock and disbelief in his eyes. She only holds her sword up and points it at his chest once again. She doesn't know how stupid he is but clearly, he is very stupid because he makes no move to get away or attack her. She hardens the grip on her handle and holds the sword right where his heart is. She looks down on his chest and then back up again into his eye. She reaches forward and rips his eyepatch off in anger. Her expression is just as cold as before but her heart beats in fear now and she does not know if she can bring herself to slice it into his chest.

For him, she thinks. For Luke. Your little Luke who only ever wanted to be held by you and talk to you about his worries over ruling one day. Luke who only ever wanted to know that he was loved. Luke who did not wish to go, did not wish to fly into a trap to his own death.

Her inner demons make the decision for her and she pushes the sword in with all her strength and feels it go through his skin, his blood spilling out like a fountain. She doesn't stop pushing in until she feels the sword come out at the other end and only then does she rip it out. The blood flows out even more and Aemond doesn't scream at the pain, only holds his chest in shock and falls backwards on the sand onto his back. Alysanne throws her sword to the side and pulls out the dagger as she falls to her knees next to his body. He looks at her, has been looking at her this whole time and still does not say anything, does not attack her or tell her to stop. He has accepted his demise, so it seems.

His blood covered hand from his chest reaches up with all the strength he has left and he touches her cheek, so softly and gently. Alysanne is crying now and can not hold her emotions at bay anymore as she feels his warm, almost hot blood cover her cheek. He wipes away her tears and she drops the dagger that she had planned to take his eye out with as he cries too but strangely, there's a smile on his face. She leans down now and lies next to him, half her body on his as she continues to cry over her lost love. She puts one hand on his where it's holding his wound and smiles back at him. She feels happiness but sadness, sorrow and relief, darkness and light all at the same time. She sees how much harder it gets for him to breathe and the blood continues to come out of his chest, staining her dress but she doesn't care.

"Will you... come back here? Sometimes, just to remember me? When you have found... someone else you will love and be with and marry, will you still.. remember me?"

He talks slowly and his voice is almost at a whisper, taking breaths in between his words and Alysanne cries and cries and cries. She sobs for him and at what she had to do and asks why in hell he had to kill her brother but she nods all the same, can not let go of her first and only real love she ever had. Her heart feels just like Aemond's wound, bleeding and pierced with a sword and she leans her head on his, her tears falling on his face and mixing with his tears.

"No, I won't ever take anyone else. I can never love anyone like I love you, Aemond. I do not understand it... I despise you and I adore you. I hate you and I love you. I kill you and cry over you dying. What have you done with me, Aemond? What is this spell that you have put on me? I can never love someone again, never in my life. And I will think of you in every breath I take, with every turn of the sun, with every time I wake and go to sleep. You will never leave me, Aemond Targaryen. In death and in life. I love you, now and always."

Alysanne sobs and cries so bitterly, so painfully that she feels like she can not breathe from her sobs. She looks at Aemond and can see the life slowly leaving his eyes and she only holds on tighter to his hand on his chest, sobs and cries as if she had not done this to him. She reaches down and kisses him, one last time and wishes she had kissed him more in the past so she could remember what it really felt like. He looks at her with still so much love and smiles at her.

"I love you, Alysanne. Now and always."

She feels his hand on her cheek slowly slip away, the strength leaving his body and it pains and fills her with joy in a way that she does not understand. She only cries more as his hand falls down, his other hand turning motionless too. She sees the moment life leaves his eyes, that his soul departs from his body. Alysanne screams now and sobs and cries and can not stop her emotions from overflowing. She leans closer to him, her head on his chest right next to where his wound is and holds onto his hand with both of her hands as she lies there next to him. Her love was gone, forever perished by her hand and would never wake up again, tell her that he loved her, hold her so gently and speak of their wedding and how happy he would finally be to not be apart, to have her at his side at all times. He would never feel that happiness again, he would never feel his love for her again, he would never feel anything ever again. She sobs and cries next to his body for some time more, knowing that what she had done would haunt her for the rest of her life. It was terrible. Terrible but necessary.

Aemond Targaryen is dead.

Lucerys Velaryon is avenged.

When she comes flying back on Cannibal hours later her family is standing at the gates, seemingly worried for her. She sees her parents waiting for her and wonders if they will judge her for what she has done today.

Cannibal lands and Alysanne quickly gets off of the dragon. Her mother and father rush to her but stop when she sees that the blood she is covered in is not hers. She must look as insane as she feels, her white dress covered in blood at almost every part, her face and hands covered in it even more. She doesn't look at either of them as she gets off, too ashamed for how they would see her now. She gives Cannibal two pats and Aemond's body rolls out of his jaw with a horrifying splat and her dragon flies off to his nest, resting from the emotional and physically turmoil he had felt today. Rhaenyra and Daemon both look at him in shock and then at Alysanne. She only looks at Aemond, his eyes now closed but his body grotesquely bloodied all the same. Her mother steps closer and holds her by her shoulder, begging her to look up but she does not. She needs to remember Aemond's face, one last time before he's truly gone.

"What happened to Vhagar?" Her father questions, his shock now over but he still seems hesitant about how he feels. She looks up now and looks Daemon in the eyes, nothing but coldness in her eyes.

"Dead, lying on an island not far from here where I found her with him. Cannibal gave her a quick death and ate half her carcass already. He'll go back for more in the next few days until there's nothing left."

She now finally looks at her mother, who looks horrified at what she has done. She wonders if her own mother might not see her in the same light anymore but she brings the hand from her shoulder to her cheek and softly holds it there, uncaring about the blood.

"You did not have to do this, my little one." Her mother has tears in her eyes and she doesn't stop them from flowing out, in sadness over how her little girl had to go through so much pain just because of the man she loved. She looks at her mother and tries to soften her gaze. She does not know if it works or if she will ever be able to feel something again after what she has done.

"But I did. I loved him but I had to kill him at the same time. I could not let him live knowing what he had done to Luke. I just couldn't."

She looks away and back down at Aemond, his face so at peace now with his eye closed and almost a ghost of a smile on his lips. She stares at him for a few seconds, tries to memorize every detail about his beautiful face and feels herself crying again without sobbing this time. The tears just fall down her face without her wanting them to, just like everything else feels out of her control. She then bends down to him and leans his head in her direction, his body already growing cold and it pains her, burns her to feel that there was no more dragon blood in his body. She reaches her hand up to his face and softly cradles his cheeks and then takes the sapphire out of his eye socket. She does not look at him after that anymore, knowing he would not have wanted her to see him without it. She stands upright again and looks at the small blue sapphire in her hands, her last memory of him. She balls her hand into a fist around the sapphire and wishes she could just be at peace in her life, for once. She does not get peace, will never get it.

She walks past her parents and into the castle, the guards she passes looking at her in horror and shock. Now they see me as I am, she thinks. A monster.

She wants to start crying again when she remembers that Aemond had once said the same thing to her about himself. She wishes to hold him again, one last time just like on the beach, hold hands with him and tell him that she loved him and could never forget him. She wishes to hold him, to be with him but she does not wish for him to be alive again because it would then rip her apart to know that the man who had murdered her brother still lived. But she wished to turn back time for the rest of her life, lay in his arms again on the beach, kiss him and tell him that she will never forget about him. But she can not.

Aemond Targaryen is dead. Lucerys Velaryon is avenged.

Alysanne Velaryon brought justice for her brother and for her family. It was justice for the world and a small consolation prize for her pain of losing Luke.

An eye for an eye, she thinks. A life for a life.

Alysanne wishes justice for herself too. She wishes death for herself too.

#house of the dragon #hotd #aemond targaryen #aemond targaryen x reader #aemond targaryen x oc #aemond targaryen x original character #aemond targaryen x you #aemond targaryen x ofc #aemond targaryen imagine #aemond targaryen fic #house of the dragon imagine #house of the dragon spoilers

610 notes · View notes

hourglassfish · 9 months

Text

A (long) Aside on 1:7 and 2:10

There are two responses to 1:7 and 2:10 that always quietly horrify me.

The first, and you know, I'm writing a multi part series on it, so it's no mystery - is that Sydney was arrogant/a brat/ couldn't hack it/ wrong to walk out, and that the situation as a whole was her fault. Nah. She was right to walk out, the biggest failure of that episode is not fucking pulling the breaks when Richie gets stabbed. The workplace has gone from dysfunctional to dangerous, she has been responsible for that danger, the perpetrator of it, and she is right to leave.

little bit of an asshole but i love you so i don't care

Carmy sees Syd saying she's going to stab Richie (as she holds her knife to his chest!) while they're up in each other's faces (with Richie goading her) and he does... nothing. He tells them to shut the fuck up and make giardiniera. At this point they needed to be separated! One or both of them needed to cool off. We've seen Syd bodily put herself between a fighting Carmy and Richie. A little reciprocity would have gone a long way here.

It's wild to me that people think that Carmy was justified in his anger and aggression towards Marcus and Syd and ignore that he is aggressive to Richie also! Richie, typically one of the more confrontational characters in the show asks him to calm down, to cool it. That so many viewers so quickly and uncritically accept Carmy's narrative point of view, even while the show actively challenges it confirms something that has been in the culture a long time: that we are much more used to excusing and aligning ourselves with abusive behaviour, than we are at challenging and refusing it. That people - many of whom have received this kind of behaviour themselves - want to defend it, makes me so, so sad.

It always hurts me a little that in 1:8 Tina tells Carmy that if he 'tries that shit with her, she'll fuck him up'. It's a fun line! But I'm sorry, no she won't. He screams at her too, while chucking bowls around and Sydney's words in 1:7 clearly hurt her. Tina categorically did nothing wrong. She doesn't deserve that shit. But at the end of the day, she is a middle aged Latinx woman and a mother, and so her tolerance level has to be higher. She needs that job! Shedoes not, as far as we know, have a father she can live with rent free, she does not have youth and the promise of exploitable potential to offer to employers in an ageist job market, she does not have CIA qualifications or a CV full of ‘serious heat’.

Carmy. holds. a. position. of. power. over. these. people. He is their boss, not their manager, and he owns the place, mob loan or no. He has the power to sack them all, to cut their hours, to cut their wages; thus the impact of that power extends not just to them, but also to their children and families. Louis being present in Review is not just to add an obstacle, it's also a reminder of those stakes.

Carmy has influence in the fine dining industry, regardless of whether that social and cultural capital is respected at The Beef or not. The very same oppourtunities that he provides them with in season 2 are things he could also lock them out of if he so chose. Any analysis of 1:7 that ignores this power is flawed from its root. When you are a boss, this power is ever present. One of the few things you can do to alter your boss's behaviour is to withdraw your labour. It's not the only option you have, but everything else is at their discretion, or mediated by lengthy, expensive legal processes.

yeh, i hate this

Carmy knows this, even if you don't! It's why the apology he gives Marcus - which Marcus does not ask for - is so heartfelt. Carmy has been on the receiving end of what that power, wielded cruelly, can do. He does not want to do this to others. We see him talk to staff with respect even while he endures horrid abuse in a flashback. We see him teach and explain himself, we see him listen and invite feedback - ‘say more’. His commitment to being a good boss is sincere, that kindness is in his bones.

The second thing people say that makes me want to die a little inside is that Carmy bought getting locked in the fridge on himself, that he deserved it in some way, and that getting locked in the fridge was him abandoning Sydney.

Oh my god!

He does not have a diagnosis yet - so anything we see is an interpretation. But it feels explicit that Carmy has panic disorder, and perhaps generalised anxiety disorder and CPTSD from both his workplace experiences and his childhood. A couple of things that he says and does suggest ADHD, or some other neurodiversity. He is not very careful with himself, and does not recognise these things as treatable problems (Richie says he experiences anxiety and dread, Carmy's response is 'who doesn't' - wince, cruel to Richie, cruel to himself - vomiting everyday and crying out of nowhere are presented as something 'loads of people do' to Sugar. Tumblr loves to send people to therapy, but I just want to send this man to do a basic google search of more than fun tbh). But they are debilitating for him, especially at work.

What happens to how we read Carmy's behaviour when he is presented as someone with an untreated disability, and absolutely no support plan in place? Does he still get his just desserts at the end of the season?

The fridge thing is a bit clumsy, I think. It's silly that over the space of three months, no one at any point just takes that job off him as a priority, or at least makes it something where Tony will call the restaurant, not Carmy specifically. It is unrealistic that there would not be some kind of back up safety lock inside the fridge. But you know, they're characters in a TV show, it also does not take two people swivelling around on the floor to tighten the coat hooks on a table (LOOOOOOL) - it's realistic until its not.

But, you know, it's doing a thing, several things - it's Chekov's gun, isn't it, it's the tangible impact of the lapse of focus that Uncle Jimmy is constantly trying to warn them about.

He wanted to cry here so bad!!! It makes me laugh every time

But umm... guys? What happens to him on that night is so, so horrible. They're a chef down, they're running out of forks, Richie's giving him shit (and Carmy is so susceptible to Richie giving him shit), Marcus and Syd are being all weird. He thinks one of his abusers (Donna) might come, or that she might not come and there will be emotional fallout from that. He thinks he sees his other abuser (Evil Joel Mc Hale) - and he's triggered. He goes in the kitchen and yells, but Syd pulls him back in. Then he goes into the fridge, partly to do chef stuff, I'm sure, but also partly to fucking get his shit together aaaaaand he gets locked in there! He has a panic attack! In a fridge! That he is locked in! And the people he loves most in the world, are the other side of that door, and for five minutes, an eternity in panic attack time, they ignore him! He has no clue what's going on! Last time shit hit the fan, two of his staff walked out (he's still not over Syd walking out cus they never talk about it properly), another one got stabbed and all these new ones are 'emerald green'. And he still thinks evil Joel Mc Hale is out there!

My loves, that shit is the stuff of nightmares! I know he tells himself that he bought this on himself but can we please! stop! uncritically! accepting! his narrative! point! of view!

I don't think anybody on screen recognises that a panic attack is what he's having. That's not their fault. None of them have seen him have a panic attack! They don’t get to see inside his head like we do (which saves them from a lot of R.E.M.) He is locked in the fridge, they just hear the bear banging on the door of his cage! It's not even in the language of the show at this point (though i am curious about how and when Richie came to get his Xanax). But that's what's happening. The team are fine. They do great. He has a terrible, terrible time.

My support worker found 2:10 deeply triggering - and her reason for this, she said, was that a lot of her job was supporting people with panic disorders who are leading teams, and seeing that moment coming, the moment where the panic crashes headlong into their role as leader. Part of her role is anticipating it, and trying to turn it around before they reach the point of no return. And as soon as Carmy thinks he sees Old Boss, he's gone. His body is in flight or fight, and he is alone with that. He can’t show up for Syd at that point, he is in his equivalent of the trenches.

This is also what is happening in 1:7. Somehow his response is often framed as a) rational or b) just an asshole - but it is so outsize to the situation, and to who we know him to be most of the time (quiet, kind, thoughtful, sensitive, BITCHY), that we know it has to be more than that.

None of this is helped by the fact that Carmy's panic attacks are... well they're kind of ugly! His meltdowns are aggressive and shouty, on the edge of physical violence, in an industry where people behave like that because they can. It is hard, parsing through that to the triggers, and fears, and panic beneath. It's scary! It asks so much of people to see that and want to help, not run away. But that is where he's at.

I do not have language for how much I hate how physical he gets with Marcus here, it is deeply upsetting

I have an access rider, to help me work well with people, and to help them work well with me. My mental health turns up in every job I do. All the time. Has done for years. It can make me unreliable, uncommunicative and absent. It can mean that people have to step up sometimes in ways they weren't anticipating. And one of the things the rider asks for is 'Good Faith' - a belief that I have not shut down because I'm an asshole, but rather because I have some unhelpful coping mechanisms that I am trying to work my way out of, that my triggers are real, not excuses for laziness or an expression of lack of care, that i will give as much as I can when I can.

Syd and Carmy are beginning to work towards this - Carmy says over and over again that he doesn't want to be shitty. Claire fucking muddies things, because I will not meet you skiving off to see your girlfriend with good faith fam. That shit he needs to be held accountable for. Dropping that envelope was a perfect Richie job, I'm still pissed about that. But being locked in the fridge... there's way more going on there.

The idea that Carmy should, and will, leave the culinary world keeps coming up in various metas. But... the problem isn't cooking? I think Carmy loves cooking, still. I think he likes being part of a team, and wants to be good at it. I think he likes teaching, and he is good at that. I think he likes picking the right silent plates and having his CDC in Thom Browne. I also think he likes being there a lot and being absorbed by his job.

The problem is that the workplace he is in is not one that is set up to his needs right now - it's not set up so that he can rest enough, so that he can eat well, so that he can exercise, or whatever he needs to do to help him manage his brain and nervous system. It's not set up so that if he is triggered, he and his team knows how to keep going with the service *and* not abandon him to the worst of his brain.

Ohhhh it's bad

Carmy ignoring Claire's call and not calling Tony feels bizarre stripped of the context of his panic attack that morning. But we know that anxiety and panic and executive dysfunction take simple things and make them insurmountable. It's not about Sydney in that moment, or even really about Claire*, and self sabotage feels so weighted with judgement when I think about what those frozen moments feel like from the inside. And I've had my diagnoses for 12 years! I've been doing that work, the long slog of trying to make sure my employees know enough context that my MH doesn't fuck up their day, whilst also maintaining my own dignity and right to privacy.

The disentangling of symptoms from personality traits is so hard - fuck ups from trauma responses, what was preventable, and what might have happened even if you did everything right. I never want to lose sight of compassion for Carmy, and the reality of how long it takes to break those cycles.

I also never want to stop seeing the power that he has over the people that he works with, and how, unfortunately, one of the responsibilities of leadership is that you have to be trying to get your shit together, you have to know yourself, and know how your baggage, combined with your power could be creating harm. It’s hard, but there’s not way around it. It is essential that he gets the support he needs, and puts the measures in place that means that he can also be vulnerable, not just for him, but for the team as whole. The power and the lack of framework together are so very harmful for everyone.

makes for delicious tv though 😉

I think a lot about the ticket machines in The Bear. I'm not thinking about them as a former line chef, cus I'm not that, I'm an artist and writer, that waitressed for a while (while a lot of chefs did a lot of coke out back!) and The Bear is fiction, not a documentary. Those little tickets are used for so many things. They're the sound of pressure. They're where a bunch of intrusive thoughts get flashed up on the screen. They are the presence of tech and of speed and alienation. They are the gap where two human beings, one asking for food, and one cooking that food, become consumer and producer. They are a presence of the machine in the workplace, and they stand in for Marcus's machines in McDonald's and for Evil Joel McHale and for financial failure.

One of the things that capitalism demands is that we always listen to that machine. That when we are making a choice, between the people stood around us, who we work with daily, who we live massive chunks of our life with, and the demand for production for go go go - that we choose the latter, even if it harms the former. That we open for service, even though one of our oldest friends just got stabbed. That we prioritise getting the service turned around on Friends and Family night (the easiest night of the year to go out, pour more wine, and say service is a little delayed, but we've got this), rather than maybe asking Fak or even Claire, to come and talk to Carmy through the door, as well, make sure that he's OK. That we just keep going.

And there are so many really important reasons to do that! Keeping going is how we learn and grow, it's how we make sure that we can pay the bills, how we provide beautiful experiences for customers and guests who are more than consumers to us.

But at some point, we have to ask at what cost. When do we stop and make different? When do we try something else, make new systems, that work for us?

A moment - a small, tiny moment - of triumph for me, is when Richie and Syd turn the table around. So rather than one person, facing the tickets alone, with their back to the kitchen as they yell out orders, the person on Expo faces in. yes they can see the tickets, but they can also see the people they are working with. They can see stress, and worry and joy. They can see how hard they are working. They can see that they are not alone, not just in a promise before service, but during service, when you need that connection most.

My hope is that Season 3 will have more of them making these decisions - ones that lean into seeing each other, where their relationships keep growing, and they build a system where the love and care they have for each other is truthfully at the heart of it.

Richie is not my bag, that's just for me, personally, but I get how much he means to others, and he's beautiful here.

*Man, I do think the romance subplot was a bit of a misstep. Pop always feels like such a waste of the audience's time, time not spent with Ebra and Tina, time spent on a presentation of romance that has been done to death and is never especially satisfying. Truncates a lot of empathy for Carmy. Boo. Hiss.

#the bear #carmy berzatto #sydney adamu

143 notes · View notes

princess-of-the-corner · 1 month

Note

Was musing on the "Aware of Abuse" AU for the Sad Rich Kids Trio and ho it influences their behavior, or how their perspective has shifted, from least to most detailed:

Adrien: He is not overtly super different, in canon he was already expressing frustration with his father and ducking out from under his control to do what he wanted.

The main shift is rooted in his perspective. Namely that if his father does love him (Doubt) then his love is so toxic Adrien wants no part of it. He deems any concession Gabriel makes suspicious at best and deems any lingering affection on his own part as a childish thing he needs to outgrow.

Beyond that he's simply more blunt, he doesn't make excuses for his father and is a bit more aware of how the other kids parenting sucks. This ironically may actually make it harder for he & Marinette as she'd struggle to see what was wrong early on and presume him kind of a brat or rude for disrespecting his father so much.

Kagami: As one might expect given how heavily controlling and authoritive Tomoe is, Kagami has very little wiggle room to openly defy her or act differently without risking being trapped or extremely harsh punishment,

As a result the shift is more in subtle things and how she communicates and views the relationship. Namely, she does not love her mother and only pays lip service to respecting anything other than her material skills as a combatant. She also feels that given what her mother does to her is largely indistinguishable from hatred (The physical nature of sparring sessions & training are deeply unpleasant) that Tomoe's feelings don't matter.

Thus she's more overt around others in her disregard for her mother and already prone to trying to sneak off or undercut her. She has burner phones and secret social media accounts for example. In this regard she likely does not become Riposte.

Instead her emotions would be mostly fear of her mothers reaction & anger at the situation and what this costs her in general. Thus she likely turns into something intent on seeking her mother out and attacking her, or otherwise trying to force her mother into her shoes. I had a name for this I think, Aku-Gami? Anyway its basically a signal flare to Adrien & Chloe of "One of us! One of us! One of us!"

Chloe: Like with Adrien her shift would be fairly recent. Mostly in response to the clusterfuck handling of Adrien after Emilie's disappearance & her parents being their worst selves about it. She was on her last thread from keeping Adrien's head above water then being booted and so she explodes at her mother over the phone & rejects her father out of anything but necessity. After which she doubles down because she can't un-dig this hole but she can sure as fuck make it big enough to engulf them all.

Put simply, Chloe's ingrained "Fight" mentality has now been turned on her parents in full. She'd still struggle to articulate most of the things they did wrong, or why they were wrong. But she is angry, rebellious and good at lashing out so she does that and only concedes when she has no other choice or legitimately terrified.

Despite this her changes are less overt, her fight mentality is a survival mechanism like Adrien's people pleasing so she can't just turn it off. She's still been actively taught a lot of terrible things like its moral to cheat to win, & un-learning that is hard, especially if doing so makes you feel weak. & She's been mimicking Audrey since forever, that doesn't just go away over night.

At the same time though she has more freedom than the others & any overt issues she can identify she can try to address for good & ill. Her dad thinks she shouldn't hang around with people "beneath her station" Well screw that she's throwing a party in the ballroom for the class/school before the new school year starts & Adrien can come too.

This likely means she doesn't rip up Rose's letter cos that was like, peak Audrey. She might be tempted to do the social media thing with Kim cos that is something someone might do, but she'd also be more able to apologize for it. She may indeed still lock Juleka in the bathroom, unless they are like, actively friendly at this point.

A lot depends on how well her shifts in behavior are taken by the class as she's not gonna suddenly be super self aware or easy to get along with in many regards. Though given S1 still had Kim get a crush on her & Rose trust her with a letter, I tend to feel it makes more sense that not everyone had a bad impression of Chloe going into the year. So it'd vary.

Regardless, Chloe would be both the most extreme in shift, while keeping a lot of thorns. But she'd be more open to changing in general if able to contextualize a negative reaction as tied to something her parents would do, letting her aggressively reject it. If she feels 'she' was in the right though, she'd not shift her behavior at all but dig in deeper.

Fucking hell I do go on don't I?

Oh I love all of this though!!

#aware au

23 notes · View notes

persephone11110 · 11 months

Text

Operation: Protect The Kid

Brotherly Jake Seresin x Reader

Warnings:past child abuse, confrontation happens, religious guilt tactic is used against the oc, insecurity/self doubt,reader is 23—jake is 36, Jake protecting his wingman/woman idk, sprinkle of curse words, mentions of alcoholism

Summary: “I’d never thought…I was worth being protected and saved. Since I was a little girl the only two words I knew were unlovable and broken”. Tilliy sighed, placing her head on Jake’s shoulder.

ofc:Tilly Lewis/ i couldn’t think of a callsign.

AN: this is the fic from the poll, i’ve started like 3 diff fics and finished half way trying to nail a brotherly jake. I made Tilly’s and Jakes age gap bigger, even tho cannoically I feel like Jake way younger than 36, and also i feel their relationship is bro/sis whilst also being mentor/mentee— since Tilly probably graduated like year or two ago. Enjoy reading ❤️ :)

- kinda short/kinda long, idk if i like the ending

—

Everytime I look in the mirror, I see the little girl who gotten beaten for just breathing and teenage me getting knocked around for looking in their direction.

—

It was small things at first. Smackings across the face, belt marks covering her ass, soap in her mouth each and everytime her parents deemed she talked out of turn. It’s normal— Tilliy thought as a little girl, it was drilled into her head like that..not until her freshman year of college she spent thirty minutes in her dorm crying after a child abuse seminar did she realize it wasn’t.

“Matilda Patrice Lewis, you look at me when I’m talking to you”. a belt ripped across her back. “I don’t love you sweetheart, and to be honest no one ever will”.

“Don’t cheat” Hangman smirked handing her a poolstick, before he walked away to get another beer.

They noticed Tilly first, before she could even get a chance to hide. She ignored the feeling of danger lingering around her, shrugged it off as guilt from the uranium mission still in lingerin. Its been so long since Tilly had to protect herself that she forgot the feeling of hatred and anger getting closer.

“Sunday’s is for worshipping god, not for drinking with the devil Matilda”, Tilly inhaled heavily—she hoped that voice didn’t belong to her, quite honestly Tilly had long gone forgotten her mother’s voice only time she remembered it is when she’s was having a bad day. Like always her mother had a way when with commanding attention to herself, Tilly could feel her mother’s anger—it was getting thicker and thicker by the minute.

“Matilda, dear I recognize those ugly back scars from anywhere”, Yeah because you and dad put them there, Tilly so badly wanted to say but her inner conscious reminded her father was behind her mother—and he never hesitated to beat the shit out of her.

Tilly had no choice but turn around, she always did feel cowardly under her mother’s gaze.

“Oh Matilda we’ve been waiting for you come home”, her eyes glistening with the tears, her shoulders close to shaking— if only she meant it, if only her mother’s sadness and her father’s grimy face were actually sincere. Too many lessons nagged at Tilly’s face, the memories of beatings coming back at full speed. “How can we love someone so broken?”.

“Inhale and exhale.. Tilly, your parents have no control over you any more… you are free”, Doctor Mandy words echoed in her mind.

“You left us alone Matilda, we didn’t know if our daughter was okay”, her father spoke, “Do you not love us?”.

Tilly shrinks back at that, does she love them?, do they finally love her?

She feels someone step behind her, she immediately realized who it was his cologne is a dead giveaway. Hangman. Tilly slighty caught his stance out of the side of her eye, protective and angry.

“Are you okay Tilly?”, before she got a chance to speak she was cut off by her mother’s harsh words. “Matilda, her name is Matilda— Tilly is too childish for a twenty three year old woman”.

“With all do respect ma’am Tilly, Is what she wants to go by and I fully respect it”. Jake says with a fake smile, any chance too show off his teeth.

“We weren’t speaking to you boy”, her father bit out, and Tilly could see his alcohol rotted teeth, three to five packs of beer a day coming back to bite him in the ass.

“I’m Jake Seresin, Tilly’s bestfriend and wingman” Jake held up his hand, not giving either a chance to speak a word. “You two, should be proud of your daughter because despite being shitty parents, Tilly made sure she didn’t become like y’all”.

“We—”, her mother tried again.

“I’m not done”. Jake crossed his arms over his chest.“You too need to listen, Tilly owes you both nothing… she had a choice to walk away from you both and yet here she is for some damn reason hearing you too out”.

“Goodbye Matilda” her father says and her mother look almost disappointed that Tilly didn’t fall for her trap again. They didn’t give Tilly a chance to answer, they both turn on their heel. The sound of the hard deck door closing was the best sound she’s ever heard.

“Thank you”, Tilly says and its barely above a whisper.

“No need to welcome me kiddo”, Jake drapes a arm over Tillys’s tender shoulders, easily relaxing her. ”You have my six, I have your six”.

“C’mere kiddo” Jake softly commanded, his eyes are softer than ever, “I love you Tilly”. Tilly fell into his embrace— she finally allowed herself to breakdown, the nagging pain of a little girl who had only wanted to be loved was far too much to hold back this time around.

“I’m sorry Jake”, she whispered into his chest.

“For what Tilly?”, he’s rubbing his hand up and down her back.

“For…not being brave enough to stand up for myself” a sob falls from her mouth. “Im so sorry”.

“Oh…Tilly, you’ve been brave for too long— you need to know there someone in your corner”. he pressed a kiss into Tilly’s head.

“Ok”

“Come on kid, lets go back to my place”. Lets go home.

#top gun #top gun maverick #jake seresin #jake seresin x reader

80 notes · View notes

ordinaryschmuck · 6 months

Text

Why I Love The Owl House-Part Two: The Relationships

Prev Part

Salutations, random people on the internet who are already skimming past this! I am an Ordinary Schmuck. I write stories and reviews and draw comics and cartoons.

And welcome to part two as we discuss everything I love about The Owl House. Because a single review wasn't enough, and, boy-howdy, did I prove that with Part One. Like...Wow. That was a lot.

But where Part One discusses the lengthy list of great and sometimes bad characters, Part Two is all about relationships. Because on top of having a diverse cast of different races, genders, sexualities, ages, and even species, The Owl House also has a diverse set of relationships that can be familial, platonic, antagonistic, and, of course, romantic. Each one is adorable and entertaining in its own right, and we're going over the best of the best today.

Quick disclaimer, though, we're NOT going to discuss relationships that didn't get much attention or ones made more interesting in fanon. I would love to talk a lot about how Luz and Vee are like sisters, but they only interacted in one episode and there's not much to go off of with the small tidbits of photos we see in the finale. And I would adore talking about how Camila's the honorary mother of every child who had come into her house. However, aside from a handful of conversations, she never interacted with anybody outside of Luz. Which is a shame because I would LOVE to see how she would get along with her future daughter-in-law. With that said, I will discuss characters who interact a bunch but note the missed opportunities they represent. Do we have an understanding? Good.

(Also, this one is going to be 26 pages long...Still better than last time, right? Right...)

Now, for this one, we’re going through it by category. Starting with…

Families

The Owl House has a surprising amount of family drama in a variety of ways. Whether it’s between siblings or parents and their children, there are a lot of stories to be milked out of with these relationships. And to start things off, let’s talk about what’s probably the healthiest mother/daughter relationship in the show.

Camila and Luz: I talked a lot about this kinship the two had last time, primarily through how Camila feels about Luz. To keep things brief, Camila LOVES her daughter. The only ones who denied that are idiots who focused too much on the negatives. Despite some missteps, Camila is proud of everything that Luz is, and came to realize that she should NEVER have tried to change a thing.

But that’s everything on Camila’s side. On Luz’s side, the love is very much mutual. No matter what mistake Camila made, Luz NEVER resented her for it. Luz may have felt sad for going to summer camp or worried about keeping Camila’s promise, but there was never any anger. The closest we got was her absolute refusal to go to summer camp, but even that was followed up with Luz feeling a quick moment of guilt for having to lie to her mother. This is because Luz LOVES Camila and, above all else, wants to make her proud and happy. The problem is Luz doesn’t approach things the right way, accidentally causing Camila strife through causing trouble at school and choosing to lie for too long so Camila wouldn’t be worried about what’s happening with Luz’s current situation. And when coming back, Luz still apologizes for leaving AND for lying, knowing that her choices weren’t the best ones to make and she regrets making Camila’s life harder. Camila’s actions weren’t the best either, but Luz was never bothered by that. She loves her mom. When stuck in the Isles, all Luz could think about was returning to her, and that’s because Camila is the one thing that connects Luz to the Human Realm. She has no friends, significant others, or mentors that made life fun in the Human Realm. Camila’s all Luz has, and vice versa.

When Manny died, it left Camila and Luz with just each other for the longest time. Because of that, they’re trying their best for one another. Camila does all she can to be the mom Luz needs and Luz, in turn, attempts to be the daughter Camila deserves. Neither got it right, but that doesn’t change their love for each other. They’re both all they have, and it’s sweet to see a mother/daughter relationship where both ARE and AREN’T at fault for a lot of stuff but still hold a great amount of love and respect for one another. They’re probably the healthiest example of a mother and her child. Though, in fairness, that’s not a steep competition.

Odalia and Amity: Yup. Might as well rip this bandaid off as soon as possible.

I think the best way to start off with these two is to ask a question: Did Odalia love Amity? I know that’s a weird question to ask considering EVERYTHING Odalia did but it’s still worth bringing up. Because I think that the answer is YES…upon CONDITIONS. As long as Amity acted exactly as Odalia wanted and followed this “perfect plan” she laid out, then Amity has Odalia’s love. When Amity DOESN’T, Odalia’s “love” turns to anger, and that’s because Odalia doesn’t want a daughter. She wants a mini-version of HER. You can see it in Amity’s Season One design, where her dyed hair and how she wears it is meant to be a reflection of Odalia. It explains why Odalia puts so much pressure onto Amity, forcing her to succeed and gain the highest ranks of society. If Odalia couldn’t be the most influential and powerful witch in all the Isles, then surely her daughter, who looks and acts exactly like her, should. And yet, Odalia’s still surprised that Amity chooses to rebel and be her own person instead of a mini-Odalia.

Amity’s resentment towards her mother is easy to pick up and the same goes for her inaction. To many kids, there’s nothing scarier than a parent, especially one like Odalia who can be very violent when angered or scorned. Amity has often rebelled in LITTLE ways against her mother, but it isn’t until meeting Luz does Amity find a lot more to fight for. She wants to carve her own path and becomes less afraid to stand up against Odalia. Amity dyes her hair and calls out Odalia’s behavior because it’s worth it for the fight for individuality. But despite this rebellion, it’s interesting that Amity still makes one last attempt to reach out in “Clouds on the Horizon.” Because while Odalia isn’t a good mom, Amity has it in her head that, surely, Odalia isn’t evil. I think a lot of kids, even ones with truly awful parents, have that mindset. Because even if they’re bad at parenting, that doesn’t mean they would stoop so low when lives are at stake, right? Except, not only does Odalia completely dismiss all life that isn’t her own, but she is surprisingly okay with the complete genocide of her people. The woman IS evil. Amity didn’t want to believe it because…well, no child DOES. But it’s that last bit of confirmation that Amity needed to cut Odalia out of her life forever…I just wish that conclusion had more of a satisfying punch to it.

I know I said it last time, but it really does suck that after everything Odalia did to Amity, things end by Amity proclaiming that she’ll never talk to Odalia again and blatantly ignores her in the finale. The thing is, I can see that being satisfying in its own right, but with how much Odalia messed up Amity’s life, treating her as a tool instead of a daughter, you can’t blame a schmuck for wanting Amity to do more. Still, I can understand Amity’s desire not to even ACKNOWLEDGE Odalia and I can live with THAT being the conclusion to their relationship. It’s definitely a better pill to swallow than what happens between—

Amity and Alador: On paper, making Amity a Daddy’s Girl sounds sweet, as does making Alador a caring father to contrast Odalia being…Odalia. But in terms of execution, this is an idea that could have definitely utilized more time to be perfect.

Amity’s desire to seek Alador’s approval and be like him feels way too sudden as every instance Alador’s been on screen before “Reaching Out,” it shows him doing something Amity has to fight back on. Granted, he was likely doing it to keep Odalia from doing WORSE things to Amity, but the audience didn’t have the knowledge of HIS situation yet. So to us, it’s more of a bitter pill to swallow that Amity wants to be like him. It’s slightly easier to understand on a rewatch, but just barely. Then the writers try to sell that Amity has a ton of faith that Alador would be on her side when going against Odalia, and it's similar to Amity trying to convince herself that her mom isn’t evil. The only difference is that, this time, Amity’s right. Her father ISN’T evil and he actually cares about his kids, which is sweet but it’s still information given to us LATER than it should. The same goes for Amity’s love for her dad. Knowing that she had such an admiration for him is something best left revealed as soon as possible and is NOT as easy to reveal through a retcon. Previous episodes leads us to believe that Amity fears and hates BOTH her parents, so having it where she loves her dad leaves one to scratch their head in confusion. But that’s just on Amity’s side. For Alador’s, it…barely works still.

I mentioned it last time, but the retcon that Alador is a father who actually loves his children is an idea that works well enough, but could be better. As sweet as it is to give Amity ONE parent that cares, it still comes up way too late in the series. By the time “Reaching Out” premiered, The Owl House was almost over, leaving not enough time to prove how much Alador cares. There’s some cute moments like him telling Amity that she did a good job through just an ATTEMPT to escape a forcefield, accepting “Luz” as Amity’s girlfriend, appreciating Amity’s new hairstyle, and giving her those little mittens. The writers ARE trying to make this idea work, but it admittedly feels like it’s too little too late.

Amity and Alador’s relationship COULD have been something great. It just either needed to be presented earlier in the series or more time to develop properly. Unfortunately, neither of those options were provided, and what we got was something that was awkwardly done. It’s still nice to see Amity get along with a parent for once and the epilogue proves that Alador kept his promise to be a better father, what with how happy he is to see her after what looked like a long journey. It’s just that, despite these attempts at cute moments, the relationship could have been done better. Still, on the bright side, at least they got along better than either did with Odalia. And, at least with her siblings, Amity has SOME positive relationships with her family…eventually.

Amity, Emira, and Edric: At the start, Ed and Em seem like antagonists to Amity, wanting to make her life suffer. I remember seeing a few fanfics that treated Edric and Emira in such a way because…well, how could there not be? Their very first episode involved them wreaking havoc in Amity’s safe space and threatening to leak pages of her diary for everyone to see. While me and my sisters definitely had our problems, they NEVER acted that way to me. It’s why I’m glad that after realizing they took a prank too far–And accidentally creating a monster that nearly killed Amity–Ed and Em went from antagonists to supporting characters. Oh, they still messed with Amity for the shits and giggles, but now it’s more out of how LOVING older siblings screw around instead of how the two twits acted in “Lost in Language.” They tease, jab, and mess around in Amity’s personal space, but it’s definitely out of love instead of malice, creating a dynamic that’s a lot sweeter to see. They went from another hardship of Amity’s homelife to one of the only people in her corner. Though, in this case, it’s less of a feat caused by character development and more by the writers changing their mind on what to do with them. Thankfully, unlike Alador, they changed their mind soon enough where this little course correction for Edric and Emira is a lot more believable and MUCH easier to swallow. It also benefits Amity by giving her two people to rely on…Or, just one.

Yeah, Edric’s primarily the odd man out in this dynamic. Emira and Amity have this adorable sisterly relationship where Emira tells Amity what she needs to hear and provide advice. With Edric, both Emira and Amity treat him as the dumb one, either making sure he doesn’t hurt himself or reticule him for his stupidity. There is SOME adorableness, though. Like how Edric ran in a full body cast and went through physical pain just so he can hug Amity. That shows he cares IMMENSELY about her and doesn’t care what happens to him to prove it. And with Emira, there’s something fascinating about how Edric’s fear is being alone forever and Emira’s is being alone with HIM forever. It IS likely that she’s joking at Ed’s expense, but there might be some truth to it. They do a LOT as a pair. They dress the same, act the same, wear similar outfits, and even have similar names. Emira definitely cares about Edric, but she doesn’t want her whole life to be defined as being his twin. It’s part of why they both went off to do different things and have their own careers not defined by what the other does. It’s great showing that while these two are similar in a lot of ways, they’re still very much different. But, once again, this is an analysis based on what’s implied and not what the series shows. There’s not enough time to build off this idea, and it still leaves Edric out of having something meaningful like what Amity and Emira have. And even then, what Emira and Amity have is something based on a few short scenes of Emira being a GOOD older sister. Still, it’s sweet for what it is.

The Blight siblings don’t have a deep or compelling relationship, but they don’t need it. Edric and Emira fill a supporting role for a secondary main character, and for what they do, it’s great. Emira’s sweet, Edric provides comedy, and they both EVENTUALLY give Amity what she needed. Her mom never truly cared and her dad…could’ve been better, but at least Amity had two siblings who care about her to a great degree. They might drive her crazy, but that’s siblings for you. Plus, at least none of them cursed one or the other. I mean, could you IMAGINE? That’s be crazy…

…

Eda and Lilith: These two…are complicated. And I’m well aware of how much of an understatement that is, but it’s true. As kids, they were thick as thieves, with both of them willing to do so much for the other. Lilith would share a scraped knee with Eda and Eda…would be willing to sacrifice more. She would throw herself under the bus so Lilith wouldn’t get in trouble with their literal demon of a principal and would willingly give Lilith a position in the Emperor’s Coven. The show makes it clear that Eda cares a great deal for Lilith. All they really had was each other in school and Eda didn’t want to change that situation, already assuming, as a teen, they would spend the rest of their lives doing EVERYTHING together. It’s sweet…and it makes Lilith’s petty jealousy and cursing Eda feel so wrong.

Lilith ALSO loved her sister, but took Eda for granted. Lilith’s drive to be the best, earning a place in the most powerful coven on the Isles, led to her fighting to be better than Eda. This fight started a rift between them, even before the curse. After quizzing Eda, and showing that she knew more than Lilith, Lilith started studying HARDER, trying to prove that SHE can learn more. She couldn’t stand being second place to Eda, so it drove Lilith to try harder and to get desperate. By the time Lilith cursed Eda, that rift between them only got worse due to a mix of Lilith’s guilt and her position as a Covenhead. Once they were adults, Lilith is in a position where she HAS to hunt Eda down for the Emperor, but in a weird way, Lilith still puts Eda first. Despite Eda’s criminal antics, Lilith wants to give her sister a chance to join the coven on HER terms, only going overboard when feeling threatened by Belos. In moments like that, Lilith tells herself that it’s all for the greater good, that Belos can cure Eda and that she and Lilith can finally do EVERYTHING together, just like they wanted as kids. And Eda might want the same thing. She might resent Lilith for hunting Eda and Eda CONSTANTLY takes Lilith down a peg, but she still loves her. Just look at when Eda races Lilith for a flower and tries to remind her about how they used to do the same thing as kids running to their kitchen. Or the times Eda showed Lilith mercy, like saving her from that crab spider or giving Lilith Eda’s ring so she wouldn’t go back to Belos empty handed. Even during their first witches duel, Eda didn’t really go out of her way to hurt Lilith. She saw it more as a game, with a lot of Eda’s attacks being more to contain Lilith or aggravate her. It’s proof that her sisterly love didn’t entirely go away all those years later…Until Lilith went too far.

The second Lilith kidnapped Luz, Eda was already out for blood, being the most violent she’s ever been towards her sister. But when Lilith revealed that she cursed Eda, she lost all sense of mercy and was willing to go for the throat. There was this brief moment of Eda BEGGING Lilith to keep Luz safe, likely reaching for SOME goodness she HAS to believe is in her sister. But that sentiment disappears quickly as Eda was willing to spend her last moments of life on trying to KILL the little traitor. Needless to say, Lilith did a lot of damage and it seemed like she had a lot of work to do…Only for things to go back to normal after one confession and another grand gesture. Sure, Lilith sharing a curse is a great start, but Eda treats it as if it’s enough with her acting like it never happened. She mentions the curse in a flippant manner, but that’s something that a person does YEARS after someone made up for betrayal, not a week. And Lilith doesn’t do much better. Despite her moments of wanting to be better, Lilith still acts like she has to be better than Eda while also behaving like she already believes she IS. Still, after all this time.

I think I like the potential Lilith and Eda’s relationship has more than what’s done with it. There’s some interesting stuff surrounding Eda’s desire to keep Lilith and Lilith wanting to make up for taking Eda for granted, but it’s NOT explored enough. They act about the same as they did in “Covention,” the episode that introduced this relationship in the first place, only now there’s a slightly less of a desire to strangle each other. Slightly. There’s some sweet moments, with Lilith comforting Eda about the stress of the Day of Unity and Eda reassuring Lilith that the curse isn’t so bad when she gets used to it, but those scenes don’t stop their dynamic being nothing no more than…acceptable. There’s a fun sibling rivalry between the two mixed in with some heart, making something entertaining to see. But when the show presents interesting ideas like Eda’s love and Lilith’s guilt, only to gloss over BOTH of them, it leaves me wanting a little bit more. I’ll take what I have, but you can’t leave a guy wanting.

But as unhealthy as things got between these two, at least they didn’t nearly cause the end of the world.

Nah, that’s the NEXT sibling relationship.

Caleb and Philip: It feels weird to talk about this one because we only know about one side of the relationship. And yet, it’s the catalyst for EVERYTHING revolving around Belos and his creation towards villainy.

In his own twisted way, Belos loved Caleb. He was all Belos had and Belos would go to great lengths to “save” his brother from damnation. I went over it last time, and I won’t repeat myself here, but while the show makes it clear that Belos’ twisted love for his brother is what drove him, we never really know how much Caleb cared for Philip. Through the memories in Belos’ mindscape, we can see that they cared much for each other as kids and Caleb was happy to see Philip again in the Boiling Isles. There’s some definite brotherly love there, but people keep circling back to how Caleb abandoned Philip. To me, with the information we have, it’s more like how Luz went to the Boiling Isles without telling Camila. There was never any malice behind the action. Some carelessness, perhaps, but neither Luz nor Caleb meant any harm to disappear into this new world and make life-changing relationships. They were both willing to come back to this person that means the world to them. Just look at Caleb’s smile upon seeing Philip again. You don’t smile like that when you resent someone or feel glad to have abandoned them. I’m sure there was love there, but again, we never get to see Caleb’s perspective of things aside from implications from Belos’ memories. For all we know, Caleb WAS a bastard bitch who hated his little brother. There’s never really an answer and I’m kind of glad there isn’t. Because Belos’ admiration for someone, even if he does or doesn’t deserve it, is still an engaging aspect for his motivation even if we don’t know the whole story.

Belos’ obsession towards his brother caused a monster to be born. He already hated witches, but losing what mattered most caused him to become genocidal. Again, I’ll skip past it because I went over it enough last time. But one thing I don’t think I can skip over is how Belos’ feelings towards his brother reflected over how he treated Hunter.

Belos and Hunter: Once again, I’ve talked a lot about their relationship last time, primarily how Hunter feared Belos. I don’t think Hunter was ever looking for love from his so-called uncle, likely because he didn’t understand the concept of love upon his creation. What Hunter looked more for was respect, to be seen as the perfect soldier that he thought Belos wanted. The problem is that Belos wanted more than a soldier and perhaps more than a tool. What Belos wanted was an outlet to project his issues toward Caleb onto.

Granted, Belos likely wasn’t aware what he was doing with Hunter, or ANY of the Golden Guards for that matter. He was creating tools for his own evil plans, but because Belos made these tools through the literal bones of his dead brother, it creates this sort of power dynamic that I think psychiatrists could make entire books about when trying to dissect it. Belos practically brought his brother back from the dead, but each time, he was always younger than Belos, reflecting the perfect brother he remembered. Only this time BELOS is the older one who knows better and gets to decide what they do and how they do it. Not only did he create a role reversal between him and Caleb, but he created a version of Caleb he hopes to have no free will. To Belos, he wanted his brother back, one that would never betray him again. Except that he did. They ALL did. Every single Golden Guard found free will and willingly went against Belos. This always leads to Belos killing these “failures,” these unusable copies of Caleb that fail to understand that Belos knows best. He refuses to accept that no version of Caleb will ever see Belos’ way, so he keeps trying to make one that does.

By the time Belos gets to Hunter, he does all he can to wipe away ANY sense of rebellion, even if he has to beat it out of him. Sorry if that statement was dark or triggering, but it reigns true for Hunter and Belos. Their relationship and everything Belos does to Hunter is a result of one man’s incapability to accept his brother’s choices and takes that as an excuse to hurt Hunter. It’s a painful reflection of real life abusive parental figures as a lot of them treat children as an object to take frustrations out on. It’s never healthy and no one should forgive an evil bastard like that no matter WHAT justification they have. All you can do is hope the child gets out of this situation and learn what real love is.

Thankfully, Hunter got that happy ending through Darius. And I WOULD go over that, but I think I said as much as I could about those two last time. The real meat of it is on Darius’ side of things as we never really got to see how Hunter felt about him aside from how the love was mutual. It’s sweet, despite not having much to talk about. As for Eda and Dell, I said about all I could last time and the same goes for Gwen. They’re characters defined by their relationships of their kids and I’d ONLY repeat myself here. But don’t fret, there’s still ONE OTHER good parent/child relationship we can talk about.

Willow and Gilbert and Harvey: No, not Gus and Perry. Due to how little of an impact Perry had in the series and how he and Gus barely interacted, we don’t get much of an idea about what their relationship is. We know they love each other, but there’s not much aside from that. With Willow and her fathers, we don’t get much with them either, but the crumbs we DO get offer some decent insight.

Willow LOVES her dads, that much is sure. Two of her biggest core memories involve her spending time with her papas, having fun and laughing with them. But more than that, Willow idolizes her dads. “Any Sport in a Storm” shows us pictures of her dads when they were younger AND that they were on the same flier derby team. It hints that Willow got her love for the game through them and wanted to become the best player she could be to honor them. It’s SORT OF stretching the facts because we don’t know for sure, but it’s still a sweet thought and how much Willow loves her dads as they love her.

Gilbert and Harvey were willing to quit their jobs just to homeschool Willow and give her the best possible education after she got expelled from Hexside. That is…an intense amount of dedication to caring for your daughter. Sure, the previous scene had them ground Willow for an insane amount of time, but that’s clearly a reaction that comes from being upset over your child being suspended. Odds are they were going to relax on that grounding with time. And even then, Gilbert was willing to let Willow sneak out and to pretend he didn’t see anything. There’s a definite love all three of them have for each other, and you have an easier understanding of why Willow misses her dads the most in the final season. With Gus, we don’t know enough to really GET how much he misses Perry, and we all know the complicated mess between Amity and Alador. It’s easier with Willow and HER dads because while we don’t have much, we have ENOUGH to get a better picture. Though I DO wish we had more time with them all together to make the relationship feel stronger, and to give more appreciation to gay parents. They keep showing up in media, especially animation, but rarely do they feel like actual characters with defining relationships with their children. While I appreciate what’s done between these three, I AM left demanding for a little bit more.

And with that, I’m finally done talking about families. But don’t worry, there’s TONS more to talk about with our next category.

Friends

There are a LOT of friends in this show, mainly because The Owl House is the kind of series that values the friendships one has with other individuals. Families are important, but the friends we make, the groups we create, can lead to more changes in our lives. They can sometimes bring out the best of us just as effectively as any family member, while also providing a great escape if our families become too much. Most of the friendships in the show are all about this, and we’re going to go through all the ones that are important.

Starting with what’s probably the most talked about friendship in the show…

Amity and Willow: The second that Willow revealed she used to be friends with Amity, the intrigue behind their dynamic SKYROCKETED. Because it would be one thing if Amity was simply a bully to Willow, but knowing that they were once close friends brings up a ton of questions. Why were they friends? Could they be friends AGAIN? Why did they STOP? Er, well, okay, that last one was answered pretty quickly by Willow in the same episode, but after “Lost in Language” hinted that Amity’s bullying is an act to not show weakness, it begs the question if there is more to it. And “Understanding Willow” proved that Amity WAS forced to end the friendship, meaning that every interaction she had with Willow since then was Amity pushing Willow further and further away to save her from a worse fate. It’s another interesting way to look at Amity’s bullying, because she DOES care about Willow. The problem is that, as Amity perfectly puts it, she wasn’t brave enough to be Willow’s friend, to fight for something she WANTED. Finally, thanks to a certain human, Amity started to gain that courage and apologize to Willow, promising to be better. Thankfully, Amity does, talking Boscha down for making fun of Willow and not even hesitating to step up and join Willow’s grudgby team when they need a third member. It’s a reflection of both Amity’s character growth AND her platonic love for Willow. She wanted to be friends again and, once gaining the courage, she set out to do just that…The problem is that Amity might have been TOO willing to be friends again.

My absolute favorite scene between these two comes in “Follies At The Coven Day parade.” Amity comes over to Willow’s after stressing over something going on with Luz and Willow, in turn, offers a healthy distraction to take Amity’s mind off her worries. At that moment, Amity says she’s glad to be friends again, but Willow’s response to that is fascinating. She doesn’t disagree, nor does she nod. Willow just…keeps quiet, frowns a bit, and lets Amity braid her hair, leaving Amity’s comment hanging with no real response aside from a light hum. While Amity’s more than happy to pick things up where they left off, this moment shows that Willow’s not exactly there yet. She’s not entirely AGAINST the idea, she would have been more vocal about her disapproval otherwise. But Willow’s not willing to COMMIT to their friendship again, feeling like there’s still more to do before getting to that point. And I love that the next episode that focuses on Amity and Willow’s relationship, “Labyrinth Runners,” expands on this idea. Amity is trying too hard to pick things back up where they left off, acting like Willow’s someone to be protected. The problem is Amity's thinking of the Willow of the past and not acknowledging the Willow of the present, who’s capable and willing to kick ass if necessary. Willow’s trying to take Amity’s attempts at support on the chin, but it doesn’t stop Willow from finally blowing up and telling Amity to back off. It wasn’t out of anger but frustration, as Willow gets Amity’s attempts to be better, but things won’t work unless Amity accepts that WILLOW changed too. It’s a great progression from how this relationship started and where it would inevitably go, and I’m glad that Willow presented boundaries that Amity needed to respect…I wish they stretched THAT aspect out a little bit more.

After “Labyrinth Runners” established that Amity needed to learn to see who Willow is NOW, the episode ends with her doing just that…and the rest of the series goes on thinking that’s enough. Yes, it’s a good start for Amity to see the error of her ways in the same episode Willow calls her out on, but then they go straight to fist bumps, counseling one another, and jumping with glee together with their arms intertwined. They’re right back to being the same friends they started as after one major hiccup. In fairness, there could have been MORE interactions offscreen where they worked through more stuff, but we never see that. All we have is what the series showed us, and it’s…fine. It’s FUNCTIONAL. But after an intriguing concept of two friends reconnecting after a BAD ending to their relationship, it could have had stronger pacing to make it feel more impactful. But despite how rough things got with Willow and Amity, at least Willow had TWO friends to count on.

Willow, Gus, and Luz: Gus and Luz were the exact friends that Willow needed after falling out with Amity. With Gus and Willow, they share a camaraderie through being near the bottom of the social ladder. Willow’s picked on for not being powerful enough with her magic and Gus was a kid whose naivety was taken advantage of by older kids who had no brains of their own. They didn’t have anyone else for friends in school, but they always had each other. That idea alone is sweet enough, but the things these two did for each other is even sweeter. Because all they had was one another, they protected one another in different ways. Willow was there to keep Gus emotionally stable, calming him down when he feels stressed or lifting his spirits when he’s down in the dumps. Gus, of course, repays that by supporting Willow’s interests, being protective when he’s suspicious of someone like Hunter, and hyping Willow up whenever possible. They both care IMMENSELY about each other, which makes sense when you become friends with someone you met at your lowest moment. But as great as Gus is for Willow, he was never really there to help her grow. Oh, don’t get me wrong, he was always a shoulder to cry on and all, but both were content to be at the bottom at the bottom. It’s until a certain someone ELSE came along did Willow realize she deserved more.

Here’s where Luz comes in, as a friend Willow needs to push her FORWARD. Luz would support Willow no matter what, but in almost every instance of character growth Willow went through, Luz was almost always responsible for it. Helping Willow cheat at Abominations class led to her proving her great strengths as a plant witch and allowing shenanigans to happen ended up jumpstarting Amity and Willow reconnecting. Of course, Luz could be TOO pushy, like training Gus and Willow too hard for a game she didn’t want to compete in, but there’s a reason for that: Willow’s the first and only friend Luz has ever had, so she goes above and beyond to make Willow’s life better. Even if Luz can sometimes go overboard, it all works out in the end, with Willow appreciating all the ways Luz helped her blossom (Haha). And in turn, Willow was there for Luz in a lot of ways, either by being her magical muscle in a dangerous situation, supporting some crazy scheme Luz comes up with, or being the voice of reason when one crazy scheme goes too far. Luz went out of her way to help Willow, so Willow returns the favor by protecting Luz to the best of her ability. It’s a perfect give and take relationship where both get something out of it. However, there’s something to be said about how Luz and Gus are the best friends Willow could ask for, they don’t really act like they’re best friends with each other.

Don’t misconstrue my words, Luz and Gus DO care about each other. Gus hypes up Luz as much as he does Willow and Luz is as supportive and counseling towards Gus as she is towards everyone she cares about. The problem is that you don’t FEEL that friendship. You get it, but you don’t FEEL it as effectively as you do with Gus and Willow or Willow and Luz. And that’s because there’s not many interactions between Gus and Luz. Throughout the course of the entire series, there has only been TWO episodes that focused on Luz and Gus’ relationship, and Gus was using Luz for selfish reasons in one and they both ditched the other to hang out with crushes in another. There’s not many positive moments between these two, which wouldn’t be TOO bad if the show didn’t paint Luz, Gus, and Willow as a TRIO. They’re ALL supposed to have this big connection together, and there’s a piece of the puzzle that’s missing. Willow and Gus are often paired together as they’re often shoved to the side, and Willow’s often treated as Luz’s first true friend, but there’s hardly anything with Luz and Gus. It doesn’t help matters that Luz barely interacts with EITHER of her best friends in Season Two onward, which is especially weird given how much importance Season One gave their friendship. Still, at least we got a lot of cute moments and two great dynamics that warms the heart, even if it wasn’t as effective as it could have been as a trio. Which gets odder when you remember that Luz and Gus have a common friendship with someone ELSE, and still not with each other. Still, to be fair, Luz barely has a strong connection with this other person too.

Luz and Hunter: Luz’s friendship with Hunter is interesting but underdeveloped. They start off strong with this dynamic that has big brother/little sister energy with the two of them annoying each other easily, more so with Luz annoying Hunter than the other way around. But despite their annoyance with each other, there’s this connection through a shared interest of wild magic…only for the show to drop that idea. Yeah, there was something there about Hunter being fascinated and even excited about wild magic, but hides it due to fearing what Belos might do to Hunter if he gets too curious. It could have been a great way to establish a connection between him and Luz, but that idea’s forgotten as quickly as it’s brought up. I’m not entirely complaining as the sibling-like bickering was fun enough as is and there was even a BETTER connection formed between them: Shared guilt.

“Hollow Mind” is an episode that chewed Luz and Hunter up and spit them out with a TON of issues. It was an unintentional mission for Luz to show Hunter how evil Belos really is, with Hunter being in denial throughout most of it while Luz becomes more and more frustrated with him. But despite that frustration, she’s still willing to help Hunter leave Belos and be there for him when confronting how disposable Hunter is in Belos’ eyes. It tells us that Luz cares about Hunter and wants him to be safe, which is a given with Luz. She’s a caring person in general to people who have a good heart shielded by a rough exterior, and that’s no different from Hunter. There were brief moments of warmth between him and her in “Hunting Palisman” and I’m sure Willow talked up the good parts of Hunter after “Any Sport in a Storm.” Luz knows there’s something worth protecting, likely why she’s working so hard to convince Hunter Belos is evil and have him be on HER side so she can help and protect him. She just didn’t expect things to be more messed up, making Hunter realize how severely screwed he is and the type of monster he helped. Things didn’t get any better when Luz realized that Belos was actually Philip and that she accidentally helped this demon of a man. So after BARELY escaping death, Luz and Hunter were left with the knowledge that they helped the most evil person alive and indirectly caused so much pain to others, including people they deeply cared about. Needless to say, it left Luz and Hunter severely messed up. And when Belos almost won and a NEW threat came to be, Luz and Hunter would feel WORSE about the pain they had a SLIGHT part in causing. They didn’t have anyone else to talk to about it due to fear of rejection and isolation from the ones they care about, but Luz and Hunter still had each other to confide in with their issues. It’s why Hunter goes to Luz about his fears that Belos is back. Neither wants the others to worry and both know that Belos is likely to spill the beans just to mess with heads. These fears give Luz and Hunter something great to bond over…And it STILL feels like their relationship is underdeveloped. Despite this big thing that brings them together, there’s hardly any attention on it as it's only focused during ONE episode. Now, don’t get me wrong, they feel SOMETHING for each other. Hunter broke down in tears when Luz said he’s worth being protected too since he’s part of the family. He HAS to care about Luz’s feelings for him if that was the case. And in “Watching and Dreaming,” Luz’s nightmare revealed that she feels a little guilty for getting a palisman in less than twenty four hours after Hunter lost Flapjack. Hunter doesn’t even blame her for that one, but it proves how Luz cares about him like she would for any other friend. But that’s the thing: Out of everyone in the friend group, Luz probably has the most one-on-one time with Hunter, yet he’s still just one of her friends. There could have been a stronger connection, and it’s not there. What they DO have is fine, it works, but when Luz has a personal bond with most of the Hexsquad and barely has anything with Hunter, it feels a little off. And it gets even weirder when Hunter accidentally steals Luz’s best friends out from under her.

Gus and Hunter: Oh, don’t worry, we’ll get to Hunter and Willow’s relationship later. For now, I want to talk about how CRAZY it is that Gus and Hunter have this brotherly dynamic. I mean, it was inevitable that Gus and Hunter would go on an adventure together. Hunter shared the spotlight with the others in previous episodes, so Gus was due a turn by the time we got to “Labyrinth Runners.” And at that point, most of Hunter’s walls were cracked and crumbling, with him trying and failing to build them back up. By the time Gus found Hunter, the poor boy was emotionally vulnerable and capable of breaking down at any moment. When he finally DOES, Gus was there to pick up the pieces and help Hunter through his panic attacks and offer advice about what could help Hunter in the future. Hunter, in turn, tried to save Gus from danger and provide some comfort too, even if Hunter is a little awkward at it. This dynamic ends up being what these two share through the rest of the series. When Gus figured that Hunter was hurting about being a grimwalker, Gus offered him a book series that gave Hunter the exact thing he didn’t know he needed with a story that had a character Hunter could relate to. This helped him a lot, and it’s an obvious attempt from Gus to get Hunter to slowly work through what ails him, and I’m certain that Hunter appreciates all of it. The same goes with the way Gus might appreciate Hunter protecting him. It was Hunter who had a protective arm around Gus after “King’s Tide” and he saved Gus’ palisman, not wanting his little buddy to go through the same pain he did. There’s an equal amount of care and comfort with these two, added with secret handshakes and the two wrestling with each other in one after-credits image. It really does feel like they’re brothers to each other, and it’s crazy to me that despite having comparatively less interactions together, Gus has a closer bond with Hunter than he does with Luz. Or, I should say, a more well-defined bond that’s easier to understand and describe. Luz and Gus are close, but you FEEL how close Gus and Hunter are. And that’s great, every guy needs a bro, but how does this happen? How does a central character done dirty by lack of screentime ends up being more of a best friend to a reformed baddie than his best friend who’s the main character? It feels crazy, and the only way it could be crazier if it was a comic relief character who became besties a reformed—

Lilith and Hooty: How?! No, seriously, on paper, this sounds LUDICROUS! Yet it WORKS!

By Season Two, Lilith is at the lowest point of her life. She lost her magic, career, and the respect of hundreds of witches. So when Lilith is stuck with Hooty, a bird tube so desperate for friendship that he’ll take it from ANYBODY, including trash like Lilith, she takes it. At first, like any reasonable person, Lilith REFUSED Hooty’s attempts at friendship, feeling like she was better than him. But when it finally occurred to Lilith how much she NEEDED Hooty, she gave in and became his first REAL friend. The best part is that she didn’t fake it. Lilith was kind to Hooty, laughed at his jokes, and gave him caring words of advice when he started doubting his place in “Knock, Knock, Knockin’ On Hooty’s Door.” Lilith DID treat Hooty as a friend because he was the only one who gave her respect in a time when she didn’t get any from anyone else. This leads to Hooty treating Lilith as his favorite person…maybe a LITTLE obsessed at times, asking for hair and beating up anyone who he thinks might steal Lilith away (Poor Steve). But Hooty being so…let’s say, ENTHUSIASTIC about Lilith is because she’s the first ever person to treat Hooty right. Everyone else either verbally berated or physically assaulted Hooty due to disgust, annoyance, fear, or all of the above. Sure, Lilith acted the same way at first, but after giving in, she became friendlier and Hooty decided he would do ANYTHING for her because of it. Whether it's to face enemies for Lilith or even step in the line of fire for her, Hooty’s willing to go above and beyond for his Lulu. Heck, it was HER voice that somewhat broke whatever spell The Collector had on him. And Lilith, in turn, was so happy to see his face again while trying to bring him back. And it’s…adorable! I can’t believe that’s the word I’m using to describe Lilith and Hooty’s friendship, but it fits! Despite how ludicrous it sounds to give Lilith and Hooty one of the most wholesome friendships in the series, the writers ran with that idea and made something that worked when it had no right to. What’s next? Making one of the main characters befriend someone that fans expected to be a new main antagonist?

King and The Collector: WHAT THE F**K?!

But jokes aside, things between The Collector and King are more or less one-sided, and I’m willing to bet that was intentional. King treated The Collector as something to be controlled, to be reigned in so he wouldn’t cause too much damage. Meanwhile, The Collector treated King as a true best friend, someone to play with and have adventures together. They never clued in how King was never really ALL IN with the friendship. He acted nice with The Collector, but the line is somewhat blurred with whether or not it’s genuine or King trying to prevent a cosmic sized meltdown. But The Collector appreciated it all the same, having a similar reaction to Hooty in which he was all alone for so long that someone genuinely being NICE to The Collector caused them to treat King better than he would with anyone else. When asking to have Francois sleep with them, The Collector was fine with the boundaries King set and respected them instead of getting angry. Sure, The Collector pushed to have King leave Francois on the nightstand, but he still kept their promise to leave Francois alone like a good little godling. And, heck, when assuming King was considering a FINAL solution for The Collector, he looked about ready to cry. The kid was angry, throwing a temper tantrum with Belos the second he dropped The Collector down a cliff. It only hurt more with King because, despite having different intentions with The Collector, he WAS genuinely nice. There may have been some annoyance about being The Collector’s playmate and the OCCASIONAL raised voice, but for the most part, King treated The Collector with kindness and patience. He knew that The Collector was just a kid who needed to mature a little and learn how to treat others properly. King acted as both a voice of reason AND a conscience, acting as The Collector’s friend to keep him happy AND maybe because he learned from Luz that it’s better to befriend your enemies. It explains why he was so patient and even believing that The Collector can be reasoned with. He knows that they’re POWERS are dangerous, but The Collector is still a lonely kid who just doesn’t know better. It’s why despite all the missteps, King wasn’t willing to give up on The Collector, hoping for the best with acting as his friend and maybe being genuine near the end there. I believe King when he says he hopes that The Collector comes back soon, because there couldn’t have ALWAYS been bad times during their months together. And now that The Collector proved that they DO know better, it could mean a better friendship for him and King. Things were definitely rocky for them both at first, but the finale left them off on what could be a good start, even if what we see will be all we’ll get. As for what we DO get, it’s a complicated relationship that I say works well enough leaving it up to interpretation to how close King and The Collector are.

But seriously, how many characters end up befriending characters we thought we would hate?

Gus and Matt: Gus befriended ANOTHER baddie?!

Okay, but seriously? I wasn’t sure where to put these two. Gus and Matt were definite rivals only to become FRIENDLY with each other near the end of “Through the Looking Glass Ruins.” Still, even then, Matt admitted that he wasn’t sure if he and Gus were friends. It felt IMPLIED, but future episodes didn’t really prove that they were friends now. At least, it doesn’t prove it on Gus’ end. He still acts annoyed with Matt while Matt seems more…indifferent? He doesn’t clap back, but he doesn’t really react at all. I guess that’s not a bad thing, but it doesn’t give a definitive answer to whether or not these two are friends, and I’m willing to blame the fact that Gus got screwed over as a character with little to no solo episodes to develop him and his relationships. Gus is friends with characters who are important in the plot or are within the main cast so that he has more of a chance to develop bonds because the story moves WITH them all. Matt is a very minor character so there’s less of a need to develop a friendship between him and Gus. This results in a weak connection between them, making it feel like they would have been better off as rivals than friends. Which is a shame because I do like the idea of Gus making peace with a bully instead of continuing a never ending cycle of them constantly trying to one up each other. Now, that’s not ALWAYS the case in life, but it’s not a horrible thing to teach kids. Especially when the show proves that there are bullies best NOT to be friends with.

Amity and Boscha: Hey, not every friendship has to be good.

There’s not many interactions between Amity and Boscha, but despite that, so much of their relationship is easy to understand and dissect. From the first time we see them together, it’s clear that their friendship is as real as Amity’s hair color. Boscha seemed to believe that she and Amity were friends, but it’s pretty telling that in the end of “Hooty’s Moving Hassle” that Amity chose to sit AWAY from everyone during the Moonlight Conjuring. Amity doesn’t see the other girls, especially Boscha, as real friends. “Understanding Willow” confirms this as it’s revealed that the only real reason why Amity’s friends with Boscha is because her parents approved it. So, believing that she had no better options, Amity kept the charade going to keep her parents happy and Amity safe. But when Amity finally found someone worth fighting for, and the bravery to match, she dumped Boscha for REAL friends. It was freeing for Amity to be rid of something, only for the writers to later decide that it wasn’t fake for Boscha.

I know that I said last time that the reveal that Boscha had a form of obsession with Amity felt rushed and forced, but that doesn’t stop it from being an interesting idea. Despite the friendship being forced upon them, Boscha DID consider Amity a real friend to do everything together. What she didn’t know was that those feelings were very much one-sided because…A. Amity didn’t appreciate having a friend forced upon her after losing another. And B. Boscha wasn’t a good friend. Not just with Amity either, as Boscha had this bossy, controlling attitude with ALL her “friends.” Now, we never saw Boscha act this way towards Amity, but there’s not really any evidence that proves she wouldn’t, either. And given how Boscha inevitably became the most controlling president of the entire school during the apocalypse, I wouldn’t put it behind her. Despite that, though, Boscha never saw herself as a bad friend and initially believed Amity’s making a mistake by aligning with “losers.” Amity never cared, and that just made Boscha frustrated, even jealous when Luz and Amity became close. Those feelings were easy for the audience to pick up, only for “For the Future” to further confirm them and put Boscha’s reactions in a new light. We now understand more about how torn up Boscha was in previous episodes and that’s why I don’t hate this last minute idea that the writers threw in. It’s still rushed and forced, but the potential it COULD have had makes it interesting. If there were more episodes to develop this idea, then it could have been a better relationship to dissect. As is, things are still fine, but weakened by doing too much too late.

But that’s enough about friends. Now that we started something negative, it’s time to lean into it by going over some enemies.

Rivalries/Enemies

The Owl House may be a show about friendship, family, and being kind to those you didn’t expect to deserve it, but there are still some characters who hate each other. These are more than negative, toxic relationships. These are pairings between characters who mutually hate each other, even if one side strongly dislikes the other more. And we’re going through a lot of hate, so let’s start with something light.

Willow vs. Boscha: It’s a classic dynamic: A bully and her nerd. That’s how it’s treated, that’s how it’s mostly seen, but I understand it as something more. I said so last time that Boscha is the perfect rival to Willow. There’s similarities in how they’re physically driven girls who need to affirm that they’re capable of being strong. The difference is their attitudes, as Willow goes out to prove that she’s as good as ANY witch and Boscha insists that she’s better than EVERY witch. Boscha believes that she has nothing to prove because she’s already perfect. So it makes sense that she feels threatened when Willow gets more attention. Boscha thinks that Willow is at the very bottom of the social ladder due to her lack of magical talent and made fun of her for years because of it. So when Willow gets a confidence boost and people notice her more as a result, it infuriates Boscha down to her core. So it’s no big surprise that Boscha doubles down on her bullying to make Willow’s life worse…For one episode.

Yeah, you would think Boscha’s worsened bullying would be continuous, but instead she lets up after the end of “Wing It Like Witches.” To be fair, it makes sense NARRATIVELY that Boscha would stop as the episode presents this idea that no matter how superior she ACTS, people will still praise how cool Willow is. That look of fear on Boscha’s face when her friends swarm Willow and ask her to join the team is a sweeter victory for Willow than beating Boscha at grudgby. And it SHOULD work…but it’d be better if Boscha was just a one-off bully. Except that she’s not. She’s WILLOW’S bully who spent so much time making Willow’s life miserable. So while it makes narrative sense for Boscha to back off, it doesn’t make sense for her CHARACTER and her place in Willow’s life. Plus, “Wing It Like Witches” isn’t exactly a satisfying end to their rivalry. It becomes more noticeable as an issue in “For the Future” when Willow finally stands up to Boscha without anyone else doing it for her. That’s a great start but then Boscha gets a forced redemption and Willow goes “This isn’t over” in a more playful tone instead of a spiteful one. And…that’s the end of that. Willow doesn’t have any final fight to shut Boscha up for good or even say, “Stay away now and forever.” They just end things on friendly terms and that doesn’t seem right? I mean, it fits with this whole “Make friends, not enemies” idea that The Owl House loves to use, but not only does this seem like a case where it would have been fine NOT to use it, it also feels a little cheap. Like, that’s how the rivalry ends? They hardly interacted in the very last episode that they’re together in, and all they did to each other comes to a close with one-sided playful banter? It definitely could use more punch to it, preferably one from Willow. And sure, you could argue that they weren’t meant to be rivals in the first place, but even if that’s true, which I honestly believe it isn’t, it would be a missed opportunity to take, which it honestly kind of is anyway. I like MOST of what we got with these two, but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want more.

But, hey, at least SOME rivalries lived up to their potential.

Kikimora vs. Hunter: Okay, this one’s definitely more or less one-sided, but it’s everything it needed to be.

Kikimora had an INTENSE jealousy towards Hunter, and that’s putting it VERY lightly. She tried to kill him three times, with her not knowing it was him the second time, and Kikimora decided her new life purpose was to prove that she was better than Hunter. And Hunter…couldn’t care less. It’s actually kind of funny how much he considers Kikimora as a non-threat. If anything, he’s threatened by what Kikimora USES, whether it’s a dragon, a mech, or a small battalion of grunts. As for Kikimora herself, Hunter reacts to her surprising the others in “For the Future” the same way a person would if they forgot to buy milk. She’s a minor inconvenience to him at best, and Hunter has no fear dealing with her. Meanwhile, Kikimora continues to plan his death as if their rivalry was on equal terms, even though it very much is NOT. And while the conclusion to this one isn’t strong either, it doesn’t really need to be. It’s a rivalry used for entertainment value and to further emphasize how detached from reality Kikimora is to believe that the Emperor’s right hand considers an angry little gremlin as a worthy opponent. It’s a short and fun dynamic that works because the show didn’t need it to be anything more. It’s not like they’re the BIGGEST enemies in the show…That’s the next relationship.

Luz vs. Belos: Out of everything in the story, the relationship between the main protagonist and antagonist is one of the most important things to get right. Fortunately, The Owl House understands this with Luz and Belos. Like most antagonists, Belos is a dark reflection of Luz. They’re both humans who came to the Isles, worked hard to find a way to do magic like everyone else, made connections with others to help get by, and changed the world through their actions. However, that’s where all the similarities end with these two, because even though they have surface level comparisons, they couldn’t be more different with what they did and why they’ve done it. Luz changed lives for the better, all because she loved the Boiling Isles and all the friends she made in it. Belos changed lives for the worse because he despised witch kind and wanted to eradicate them all from the inside out. And when both faced the other, Luz and Belos had different ideas of who was the hero of this story. To Luz, it was obvious. Almost ANNOYINGLY obvious, as she couldn’t get how no one else could see how Belos was clearly evil. As for Belos, he didn’t necessarily see Luz as the villain, but instead as a tragedy. Just like his brother, Luz was taken in by the witches and their sinful allure and was too far gone to fix. Belos is still “merciful” to her, but that’s because Luz is the first human he has met in years and he’s willing to refrain from eradicating her like a common witch because there’s a chance that she might see the light. It’s why, even during his death, he is begging for Luz to reclaim her humanity again and be better than those witches. There’s just one problem: Everything Belos believes Luz to be is complete horseshit.

Luz isn’t a tragic loss, she’s a GOOD PERSON. Hell, she’s more human than Belos could ever be as Luz treats everyone in the Isles as actual PEOPLE instead of sinful monsters. Luz chose to help witches because she genuinely cares about them and wants to save THEM from danger. Right from the beginning, Eda was more than willing to let Luz run away back home only for Luz to stay because these witches and demons needed her help. That doesn’t make her a tragedy but a person who’s actually pure of heart. And as for Belos’ “mercy,” it was out of selfishness despite how much he’d tell himself otherwise. When letting Luz free to save Eda, he practically did it with a gun to Eda’s head so Luz would be willing to give up the portal door. That and likely because he deduced that he needed Luz’s help to get The Collector. And after nearly killing Luz in “King’s Tide,” he decided to stop because Luz convinced him that she could be his guide in the modern human realm and verify his achievements. Belos may have believed that he was being altruistic, but in reality he backed Luz in the corner, forcing her to do and say what Belos wanted. Only for Luz to prove that she’s NOT an idiot by outsmarting him both of those times, nearly killing Belos the second. It shows that not only does Belos misunderstand the kind of person Luz is, he underestimates her. The man who lied and tricked his way to the top got beaten at own game by some teenage girl who is great at sleight of hand and appealing to someone’s needs. Yet despite this, Belos still thinks that he can outsmart Luz one last time by blaming his actions on a curse. Because he still believes he knows that Luz is a misguided girl and tries to use her kindness towards others as a way to convince her. But while Belos fails to understand Luz, Luz came to learn EXACTLY the kind of person Belos is.

Being a fan of fantasy as a genre, Luz could tell upon seeing Belos that he was evil. And, again, it’s pretty telling how Luz feels about him when she, the kindest character in the show, immediately went for the head. But while Luz was aware that Belos was obviously evil, she didn’t know with Philip. Her first impression of Philip was that he was a wise man who could potentially help her, which is the exact image Belos tried to portray with Luz years later. The only reason why it works with Luz when she meets Philip is because she read his adventures, which were personally revised by Philip himself, and he didn’t look like much of a threat. It isn’t until Luz catches onto what type of con artist Philip was that she soon switched gears to hating the old bastard. Rightly so, of course, but it would unfortunately come too late as Luz already helped Philip without even knowing that he was on his way to becoming Belos. The realization that Luz accidentally created a monster haunts her and will continue to do so for years. It’s why she REFUSES to buy any other trick or lie Belos tries to pull and kills him without any mercy. She knows that there’s nothing he could say to change Luz’s mind, because all the tricks in the past proves that he’s full of it. And as he berates witches with his last breath, it’s all Luz needs to know that she’s making the right choice. Belos was a monster that ruined lives, including Luz’s, and she’s most definitely glad to be rid of him.

Luz and Belos has a perfect hero/villain dynamic that I adored. I DO wish they interacted more to further sell that dynamic, but that’s nitpicking at best as they’re both still wonderfully written. There was definitely no missed potential with these two…Speaking of missed potential…

Darius vs. Alador: Alright, in fairness, this one might not have had much attention on it anyway, even if the show had more time. And large and part because it’s something that’s more or less written in the background of everyone else’s stories. Just small comments like Darius calling Alador a hack and actions where Alador tosses Darius’ book away in disgust. They were never a focus of an episode, but the writers still made it a fact that Alador and Darius couldn’t stand each other. And it works for what it is…but then there’s this level of intrigue presented in “Them’s the Breaks, Kid,” a flashback episode that briefly revealed that Alador and Darius were once friends. That inevitably led to questions, all circling around what could have happened between then and now to cause their friendship to change into a rivalry. There’s some definite intrigue to what could have happened, and it’s why I’m willing to say it’s a missed opportunity to not explore it…HOWEVER, I will also admit that it’s not a HUGE thing to focus on. Out of everything in the series, there’s bigger fish to fry than explaining why a secondary character’s dad came to hate a side character. If the show had all the time in the world, it would definitely feel more like a missed opportunity. As is, it’s still perfectly functional as a rivalry with a bit of unresolved intrigue. I would have loved more, but I’m not losing hair over it.

And yes, I know, there’s a possibility that these two could be a couple, but that’s more or less hinted as a possibility because of ONE interaction near the end. I wouldn’t say it’s anything official outside of that…But since we brought up SHIPS…

Couples/Ships

Quick stipulation, this isn’t about popular ships within the fandom. You’re not going to see Viney and Emira or Viney and Skara just because there’s a lot of fan fics and MoringMark comics about them. There’s also not going to be any POSSIBLE ships here. We’re discussing what’s canon and official based on what we’ve seen in the show. So no Veesha, despite how adorable and crazy it is to have a crack ship actually be a possibility.

No, instead, we’re discussing the ships that were built up within the show, their ups and downs, and how they worked as a couple. And to start, let’s just go ahead and rip off the bandaid. There’s one ship we ALL know deserves to be talked about, and it’s best to start off with…

Alador/Odalia: Hey, not every couple is good for each other.

Full disclosure, I had NO idea where to place these two. I THOUGHT about putting Alador and Odalia in the family section, but their relationship cannot be described as that. Even putting them HERE feels like a stretch. But there’s not really any better place for these two. I could call them enemies, but that also feels like an oversimplification because they don’t really hate each other…At least not until “Clouds on the Horizon,” but we’ll get to that.

Just like asking if Odalia loved Amity, I have to wonder if she loved Alador. Because, truthfully, I think she DID, once upon a time. I look at that photo of Alador winning the Bonesborough Brawl, and it definitely hints that there was SOME infatuation there on Odalia’s face. Granted, being attracted to someone and loving them are two different things. Dozens of fans hate Odalia with their final breath, but will go on record saying that she’s pretty hot. And…yeah, fair. But I definitely feel like she felt SOMETHING that went beyond physical attraction once. As for whether she feels the same in the PRESENT, I definitely say that same spark no longer exists as Odalia sees Alador as nothing more than a business partner than a romantic one. She compliments his work, but you can argue that’s just Odalia being glad that she’ll be getting richer instead of admiring Alador’s passion in his craft. And when Alador says something Odalia doesn’t like, she doesn’t waste a second to threaten divorce and take away what Alador really cares about: The kids. Odalia may not fully care about her children, but she knows Alador does and is too willing to use them as leverage. Any attraction Odalia may have felt is certainly gone, with the only thing she has left to feel is maybe physical, but I wouldn’t bet on it. Mainly because Odalia seems like a woman who would have private affairs with better looking men, and can get away with it because she’s in charge of every aspect of the relationship. And Alador suffered for it.

Now, as for whether or not ALADOR loved Odalia, I’m once again willing to say yes…to a point. Some say that their marriage was more or less arranged for the sake of business or Odalia pitched their marriage as a business proposition rather than anything romantic. And while I can definitely see that, a part of me believes that there WAS something there and that Alador stuck with Odalia because he initially fell for her. If it was strictly a business thing, Alador would have walked out any time with how Odalia treated him as an employee rather than a partner. And the arranged marriage seems off too because Alador, even before working through hell, seemed too messy to be from a rich family willing to do business with Odalia’s. So I believe that the best explanation is that Alador used to love Odalia once, but that love would fade away over the years. The only thing that kept Alador by her side despite the anguish is both the kids and, quite possibly, because Alador’s feelings didn’t COMPLETELY fade until “Clouds on the Horizon.” Trust me when I say that for some couples, even married ones, find it hard to get out of a relationship that’s toxic because they cling too tightly to the good times. You know you can do better, but you stick it out because your brain keeps telling you “Well, they’re not ALWAYS this bad.” I feel like the show hints how THAT’S how Alador feels with Odalia. Look at that smile he gives her in the end of “Escaping Expulsion.” Odalia’s compliment might not have been wholly genuine, but Alador’s smile was. It’s almost as if he’s taking the compliment at face value and sees it as an example of Odalia being not so bad. He takes little moments like that until finally meeting his wits end in “Clouds on the Horizon,” where after learning that he missed so much of Amity’s life in “Reaching Out,” Alador’s a bit more willing to fight back against Odalia. Still, there’s that part of him saying, “Well, she’s not THAT bad.” And just like Amity, Alador’s telling himself that Odalia couldn’t be THAT evil in selling weapons to a genocidal maniac. But once finding out that she IS, it’s the last push Alador needed to shut up that voice inside his head and officially cut ties with Odalia forever. It’s a great representation of how a toxic marriage can grow over time and that even men can face abuse from women…At least, that’s how it should be on paper. But much like the rest of Alador’s character, everything is better on paper than it is in practice.

A lot of what the writers do with Alador and Odalia still works…enough. It’s right on that line where everything the writers try is still functional but could still be better. A lot of my analysis between them is based on looking deeply at minor implications at best and seeing something that isn’t there at worst. It would benefit MORE if we saw the good times Alador and Odalia had together or if we saw more of a conflict with Alador’s perception of Odalia. As is, I still LIKE what’s done and what it represents, but I still admit that it could have been better. Maybe with more time, it COULD have been, but alas, that’s not the case.

But that’s enough of a ship that sank. Let’s talk about one that had SOME fans at first only to SKYROCKET into popularity when the writers started making it a possibility. To the point where you see them almost everywhere. And that is…

Willow/Hunter: I’m not kidding, it feels like these two are EVERYWHERE now. I remember seeing, like, one or two bits of fan works of Willow and Hunter together that made me question people’s sanity. And then “Any Sport in a Storm” happened and a lot of people, including myself, went, “I get it now…”

There’s a lot of potential present with Willow and Hunter. They’re both people who work hard to prove that they’re stronger than anyone expects. Willow is quick to identify with Hunter’s self-deprecating view of being “Half a witch,” and Hunter admires Willow’s show of strength and determination. The ideas of these two becoming a couple grow stronger the more “Any Sport in a Storm” goes on, with Willow showing that while she understands Hunter’s plight, she doesn’t treat him like a wounded puppy and YANKS him away to prove that NO ONE should be underestimated. It shows that while Willow cares, she will be direct and to the point, the type of language Hunter understands. And to Willow, it’s really smart that she was introduced to HUNTER first instead of the Golden Guard. To her, Hunter wasn’t a threat, but a kid. A weird kid, sure, but one who still has insecurities and comes across as a little awkward in a charming way. Even when the truth comes out, Willow’s taken in by the charm of how Hunter clearly doesn’t know how to act as a kid. As for Hunter, he’s definitely the one who developed a crush first, proven by that little hint of a blush near the end of the episode. It makes sense, given how Willow was the first person Hunter met that was BEAMING with positivity and didn’t immediately want to kill him. Add that with the fact that Willow is a no nonsense person who has some of the most powerful magical abilities he’s ever seen, she likely checks the boxes that Hunter believes to be noteworthy. But it’s Willow’s kindness that sucked Hunter in.

Hunter knows Willow is tough, but he appreciates the way she seemed willing to forgive Hunter despite kidnapping her and the rest of the Emerald Entrails. Willow’s nice, and she continues to be so when stuck in the human realm. Willow cuts Hunter’s hair as he’s having an identity crisis and supports his bizarre fashion choices after he reads Cosmic Frontier and gains a better understanding of himself. The best part is that Willow didn’t know the full picture during these moments. She just thought Hunter wanted his hair cut and was trying something new and fashionable, but the facts didn’t matter because she was a hundred percent on board anyway. That level of support was something Hunter rarely got in his life, and he got it from Willow the most. It all adds up to why Hunter has a crush on Willow, making it easy to buy why he does…The problem is that I can’t exactly say the same about Willow’s crush on Hunter.

I get that Willow likes Hunter and that she cares deeply about him. She’s crying the most when it looks like Hunter’s dying in “Thanks to Them” and it’s when Willow fails to help him in “For the Future” that almost breaks her. We GET that she cares, but there’s never really that MOMENT where Willow’s clearly crushing on Hunter beyond implications and two “blink and you’ll miss it” blushes that come near the end of “For the Future.” There could be the argument that Willow likes Hunter the MOST out of the friend group, with some pointing out that she went the most feral in “Clouds on the Horizon” when she thought it was HUNTER who was in danger. A friend of mine pointed out that Willow would have acted the same way if she knew it was Luz, and while that’s definitely true with her attacks on Kikimora, Willow went from the first to hijack an airship to save Hunter to the most held together when she found out it was Luz. So I could definitely see the case that Willow cared a lot about Hunter but never realized it was a crush. What bothers me is that it doesn’t feel BIG when Willow discovers her crush. I mean, yeah, it’s sweet that Hunter admitted how much Willow means to him and that he’s willing to be a shoulder to cry on…but that’s the same with Willow’s other friends. There’s nothing that different with Hunter as there is with Luz or Gus, and by the time Willow’s blushing it feels like something that NEEDS to happen to confirm her crush. And I fully blame how underdeveloped it is on the show’s shortening.

Hunter and Willow becoming a couple was an idea brought up when the show was nearing the end, leaving the writers with a handful of episodes and three specials to make it make sense. What went wrong was that they focused more on Hunter’s feelings than Willow’s and made it canon as quickly as they could. And even then, the canonicity of their relationship is more implied if anything else. Like, it’s obvious to anyone with EYES and a BRAIN that Hunter and Willow are a couple, but there’s never this verbal or physical confirmation that they’re together. They have their arms around each other in the finale, but there’s not much other than that. On the one hand, that’s great role reversal as shows for YEARS had to rely on implications towards their same sex couples while being as explicit as possible with straight ones, where The Owl House is the exact opposite. But on the other hand, why even make these two a couple when you’re not even going to make them kiss?

Back when I said “I get it now” after “Any Sport in a Storm,” I realized I was excited more by the IDEA of Hunter and Willow without knowing the actual execution. We could have seen Hunter deal with his first ever crush and Willow learn that she has someone who loves her no matter how “powerless” she can be to others (Primarily Boscha). What we got instead was HALF of that, watching some great stuff with Hunter but not much with Willow. Still, these two have their fans and I can definitely see why. The IDEA of them together is great and it’s why I still like them being a pair. However, based on what the show gave us, their love didn’t bloom (Hahaha) as effectively as it should.

But I know the REAL couple you want me to talk about. It’s one of the biggest relationships in the show, due to how effectively it appeals to the LGBTQA+ community. And that is…

Raine/Eda: Because, let’s face it, older people can be queer too.

On top of being a stellar representation to have one of the main characters fall in love with someone non-binary, The Owl House does great at telling Raine and Eda’s love story. Cleverly, the writers introduce Raine as someone Eda knew and was obviously in love with. By withholding most of their past for future episodes, it leaves this first assumption that they were both in love with each other for years but likely never bite the bullet by asking each other out. I mean, they were nervous together with Eda being a blushing mess half the time. It’s not like they were exes, because people don’t act that way towards someone they broke up with…Then, literally, the next episode later, it was revealed that they WERE exes. Even better, Eda didn’t want to break up. She DID want Raine, but Raine felt like they weren’t wanted because Eda wouldn’t let Raine in to help with the curse. Eda left them at arms length to keep them safe, only for Raine to break things off because, well, how would YOU feel about your partner being distant when all you want is to be close? This brilliantly recontextualizes “Eda’s Requiem,” as Eda’s the one always blushing and looking away, as if she doesn’t want to let on how much she still loves Raine. Yet, upon seeing them for the first time in YEARS, Eda practically jumps at the chance to work with Raine in rebelling against Belos, partially because of the chaos she’s excited to cause and because struggling to grasp that her kids might leave one day so Eda throws herself into the first relationship she can think of reconnecting with. Raine, albeit too late, catches onto this and stops Eda before she makes a mistake she can’t take back, helping her live so that she can be better to her kids than she was to Raine, letting them stay instead of pushing away when it feels easier. And likely because Raine still loves Eda too.

Then Raine grew kidnapped…sort of. They ARE taken away with Terra trying to brainwash Raine into changing everything they are, but Raine’s smart enough to avoid the obvious trap and tricks everyone into believing that they WERE under Terra’s influence. The thing is, though, that Eda AND the audience didn’t get this information until FOUR episodes after being fed information that they’re brainwashed. So when Eda tries to rescue Raine, they had to keep up the act because Eda would ABSOLUTELY interfere or throw herself into danger for Raine. But Raine doesn’t want Eda in danger, so they lie and keep her as far away as they possibly can…doing almost the same thing Eda did years ago that caused Raine to break up with her. The details aren’t exact and the circumstances are more complicated, but the spirit is still there as Raine tries to keep Eda as far as possible from any danger so she won’t get hurt. Only for Eda to prove that she’s one to face danger head on for the ones she loves and that the safest place is right by Raine. It also helps that Eda initially contacted them, begging Raine to save Luz because she needs to be FAR from danger and Eda doesn’t care what’s going on with Raine at the time doing this. Eda trusts them more than anything, and this moment of fragility helps Raine realize they’ve been thinking backwards in trying to help Eda. And helping Eda is all Raine set out to do, trying to give her any out possible from being branded with a sigil and ripping Eda’s arm off so she wouldn’t die with the others…It sounds horrific out of context, but trust me that it proves how much Raine cares for Eda, willing to do anything for her survival. The love between these two is as clear as day, and how the writers went about showing Raine and Eda’s feelings is smart…BUT…

As good as this ship is, a ship like Princess Bubblegum and Marceline the Vampire Queen from Adventure Time shows what Raine and Eda could and SHOULD be. It’s a similar dynamic, as Bubblegum and Marcy broke up in their younger days only to reconnect MUCH later because they needed more time to grow before becoming the perfect couple they were meant to be. It’s to show that your first love CAN be your true love, but sometimes people need time apart to become better before realizing you never wanted this person out of your life in the first place. That’s not the same for everybody, but for these old gays, it is. The difference between Raeda and Bubbline, though, is that Bubbline focuses on the growth BOTH characters have to go through. Bubblegum and Marceline have their own baggage to overcome and the majority of their time on the show is about them learning to deal with it not necessarily for each other but for themselves and the people they love. With Raeda, it’s the same idea, but it’s Eda who grows more. And that’s because Eda, upon conception, was her own character where Raine, as I said last time, was a love interest. Still wouldn’t say that makes Raine less of a character, but for this relationship that means there’s less attention on THEM to grow as they’re often treated as this perfect person who Eda tries hard to fight back for. Now, there’s stuff that Raine did wrong too, with pushing Eda away from danger and constantly putting Eda’s needs in front of their own. However, the show never really digs deep into those issues, nor is there a moment where Eda confronts Raine for how THEY acted. Granted, Eda doesn’t have a leg of her own to stand on, but we’ve at least seen her grow past pushing people out of her life and letting them back in. Most of Raine’s development coincides with Eda’s, making it where Raine can’t adequately grow past their own failings. It makes it feel like it’s EDA that has to grow more to get Raine back, which would be fine, but it also makes Raine feel more like a prize Eda needs to earn instead of a character who has their own stakes in the relationship. It’s the part of Raine and Eda’s love story that gets to me a little, but, even then…I still loved that these two got back together.

Raine and Eda’s chemistry is on point and you get why they love each other. They’re both agents of chaos, Raine going for more controlled chaos while Eda is just all in for pure havoc. Eda brings extra fun into Raine’s life while Raine makes sure they BOTH don’t get into trouble. It’s like Raine and Eda were made for each other and you DO want them to get back together. Those scenes where Eda peppers Raine’s face with kisses and later snuggles up to them when all the craziness is over is ALL I ever wanted. I’m glad I got it, even if the development of their relationship could’ve been better, I’m still happy that they BOTH got their deserved happy ending.

But that’s enough teasing. You may have noticed that I haven’t talked about ONE relationship yet. One that is HUGE within this series. A relationship so big, so important, that to lump it in with all these others is a disservice to how major it is. A relationship SO GOOD that it deserves its own category as…

It’s Own Thing

You all know who they are. They’re a relationship that makes the show what it is and are the very reason why it’s so good. They’re so important that The Owl House wouldn’t be the same without them. And they are…

Luz, King, and Eda: Or our main trio, to be short.

Yeah, crazy enough, the most essential relationship in the show happens to involve the three main characters in it. The Owl House starts with them, ends with them, and features them almost always going on adventures, sometimes alone but always ending up back together. Together, they’re more than a group of weirdos stuck together. They’re a family.

Luz and Eda have this VERY obvious mother/daughter dynamic. Eda may have called Luz her human, apprentice, and, most times, KID, but it always felt like she was one slip of the tongue away from saying “daughter.” Eda’s motherly instincts kicked in nearly instantly, where the second Luz is put into too much danger, all the woman can think of is getting Luz FAR away from it. It’s large in part because Eda’s a naturally caring person, whether she likes to admit it or not, and doesn’t want this young girl to get hurt. But the more time Eda spends with Luz, getting to know this crafty kid with a good heart, the more it becomes clear that Eda wants to protect Luz because Eda sees Luz as her own. Not only can see it in all the ways Eda smiles at Luz’s antics or comforts Luz when she needs it, but Eda’s motherly love for Luz is clear as day when you notice that Eda’s at her most panicked and angry when Luz is in danger. Anyone can be nice to some random teen that refuses to leave their home, but it takes a mother to be equally soft and protective towards that child. And let it be known that the feelings are very mutual, as Luz often looks up to Eda as a second mother. Just like how Eda is always SO CLOSE to saying “daughter,” Luz always sounds like she means “mother” when she says “mentor.” Luz constantly goes right to Eda for help, information, and advice on pretty much every aspect of her new magical life. Sure, this could be because Eda’s the closest thing to an adult that could take Luz in, but Luz ALSO forms a better bond the more time they spend together. Luz cares so much about how Eda sees her and wants Eda to be happy above all else. You could say that it’s the least Luz could do for freeloading in Eda’s home (and you’d be a prick for saying that), but it comes from a genuine love, respect, and admiration for Eda. Hell, it’s LUZ who’s the first to admit that they’re like family and to say, “I love you” in “Young Blood, Old Souls.” They both clearly see each other as a mother and her daughter, even if neither of them use the actual words “mother” or “daughter.” The spirit is definitely there and it’s adorable and entertaining to see each episode.

However, out of the three, I feel like it’s King who’s often treated as an afterthought. For Luz and Eda, King’s either treated as a sidekick, a friend, a son/brother, and a pet. Although, this is primarily because the writers clearly didn’t know what to do with King until Season Two, which is around the same time Luz and Eda started treating King more consistently. Luz became more of a protective order sister and Eda became more of a mother (Mainly because King legally made himself her son). BUUUUUUUUUT, it doesn’t change how off the inconsistencies felt early on, nor was there enough time to make these dynamic changes feel like they stick. Especially since King rarely showed any genuine care until near the end of Season One. He still showed that he appreciated Luz and Eda and was happy to have them, but also treated them both VERY poorly, like with how much he intentionally annoyed Eda or cracked jokes at Luz’s expense. He didn’t hate them, but it definitely took King more time to love the family he has. Likely because Season Two made him realize that he didn’t have any biological family outside of Luz and Eda (and sometimes Hooty). Even when the idea that his real family is out there, King still considers Luz and Eda a part of it. It’s all sweet to see even if it feels a little late to the game.

The best part about these three, though, is the mutual amount of love and care for each other. Some of the sweetest scenes in the show feature Luz, King, and Eda lifting each other up, comforting one another, or just…goofing off and having fun. Their bond and chemistry as a trio is on point and you get how important it is when this trio splits up for Season Three. Because Season Three…was better than it had any right to be. “Thanks to Them” started the season out strong as the best episode in the series, “For the Future” also existed as good but not great, but it wasn't until “Watching and Dreaming” did things start to feel right. As good as “Thanks to Them” was, it felt like one of the pieces of the puzzle was missing. I loved almost every minute, but there was something that made “Thanks to Them” unable to be the best representation of what makes the show so good. And what was missing was King and Eda. It felt so wrong to watch an episode without either of them being right there with Luz, almost as if the show was incomplete without them. Things didn’t feel much better in “For the Future.” King and Eda were there, but separated from Luz as they dealt with The Collector while Luz was dealing with…a lot more. We saw all of them in the same episode, but something STILL felt missing. It’s not until we get to “Watching and Dreaming” does it become clear: What was missing was seeing the trio TOGETHER. Seeing all three of them reunite and interact with each other again finally made it feel like I was finally watching The Owl House again. You could have a great show if it was Luz with her mom and friends, dealing with teen drama. You can even have an okay show if it was Eda and King going through some magical nonsense. But when you bring them together, have them go through everything with each other close by or by their side, then you get The Owl House. All these other relationships could’ve been cut and the show wouldn’t suffer, but The Owl House wouldn’t be the same without Luz, King, and Eda’s bond.

And…Yeah, that’s about it.

The relationships in this show are varied, both in the different dynamics each character has and the quality of how they’re written. There’s a lot of great ideas, but some seem like there’s not enough time to make them meet their full potential. Regardless, the ones that DO work succeeds in bringing more warmth and intrigue to an already great show. There’s much more ups than downs, and it’s always endearing seeing great characters forming perfect bonds with other great characters.

That’s all for now, though. So I will see you all next time as I discuss—What? Why are you looking at me like that? Did I forget something?

…OH! You thought I forgot ANOTHER relationship. One that features two of the best characters in the series.

A relationship that’s adorable and gave me so much happiness in this dark place we call Earth.

A relationship that is IMPRESSIVE LGBTQA+ representation due to its normalization and how much attention is given to it.

A relationship that, while The Owl House wouldn’t be the same without our main trio, the very same could be said about this other relationship.

A relationship SO GOOD, that to just go over it as simply as I went over the others would be too great of a disservice.

Because that relationship is, without a doubt, the best thing about the series. And no, I’m not kidding.

You’ll see why…next time.

Next Part >

#the owl house #the owl house review #LONG POST AGAIN #sorry #luz noceda #eda clawthorne #king clawthorne #camila noceda #amity blight #willow park #gus porter #hunter deamonne #emperor belos #what i thought about

48 notes · View notes