#bc she wants so bad for them to have a better relationship

[cinnasweetss]

so no out of bounds part two ?? :(((( I really wanted them to actually get together TT

nonnie…so sawry…it’s not that romantic! >_____< are we forgetting that oob!jake is not a good person ??____?? reader js wants him to be…she’s in de nile 😭

read out of bounds here.

cw for dark themes. mentions of noncon/dubcon.

I can’t see them getting together tbh. atleast not officially. it’s mentioned that reader has a boyfriend that jake is not fond of. if anything further happens it’s probably not with the consent of reader…not that anything else was anw. 😭

like jake starts calling more and more while sober bcs he got away w it the first time. reader js had to be stupid and say “one day” to try and satiate him but it makes everything so much worse…bcs now he thinks he has a chance. everything else falls into the same pattern.

he’s more aggressive with his attempts to get at her. the threats continue, the groping becomes even more frequent. now he’s doing it when and where he can potentially get caught.

eventually he just snaps…he decides today is that day. he has to have her one way or another. he prob doesn’t even realize what he’s doing…he js needs her soooo bad :((( like he’s finally got himself a lil taste

but ofc reader let’s him get away w that too… n it puts so much stress on her relationship that she breaks up with her boyfriend.

it’s a lot of things she doesn’t admit, too…like the fact that she’s been sneaking around, jake is way better in bed & she did break up with her boyfriend bc there’s someone else…prob will use some bullshit excuse like “i just don’t think it’s gonna work out!” & “it’s not you, it’s me! really!”

ofc jake is in her ear through the entire breakup. literally and figuratively…if u kno what I mean. doesn’t even give her time to heal! he’s in her that same day…putting all kinds of shit in her head

most of the stuff he says is sooo nasty, like “this pussy gets so wet for me. me only. isn’t that right, noona?” , “the way you’re moaning I know i’m the best for you.” , “stop running. you can take this much.”

but at the same time…“u know ur mine noona” , “promise me you’ll never see him again. hm?” & “I always knew you’d come to me noona”

out of bounds jake is a mess!!!

#cinnasweetss #cinnasweetss: out of bounds #jake sim #jake smut #sim jaeyun #jake x reader #enhypen jake #enha smut #enhypen smut #enhablr #dark themes #enhypen #no more out of bounds asks I BEGGGG #JAKE BRAINROT RAAAHHHHH

[adamanteine]

many thoughts about shams being able to sympathize with her mother but still being angry at her father (and having this one part of her that isn't able to forgive him) despite the fact that she is much closer to her father

#ethnic oldest daughter things! #her relationship with her mother is strained #yes! #but even tho shams feels a very good connection to her father due to the fact that he actually acted like a father #she feels angry at almost everything #at the fact that she lost her wings bc of the feud her father has #which deep down shams can understand is not entirely his fault #but its not something she can control #so even though her and her father spend a lot of time together and she trust him greatly there is still this part of her that cannot do it #100%...... she loves him YES but she is angry with him #i wouldnt say her relationship with him is bad in any way tho just a bit more complicated #and then you have her mother #who never actually acted like a mother #who just did her responsibilities without the actual motherly aspect of caring #who had her life ruined due to the misogyny of their society #and decided to reflect that same misogyny unto shams #(which took shams some time to genuinely be able to get rid off and make a choice for herself) #but she???? understands where her mother is coming from #she's helped so many women in her lifetime that she understands enough of what they go through in a society like theirs #and she knows her father may have been a good father but he was not a good husband #so any time she thinks of her mother its more sadness than anger #bc she wants so bad for them to have a better relationship #but at some points she also had to step back bc of how draining dealing with her is #but she understands in the end!!! where her mother is coming from #sorry i'm listening to ethel cain i'm just insane rn #&̲. ¹ out of character.

[dennisboobs]

ok at the point now where looking at an image of dennis makes me want to smash my head through a wall

#ada speaks #idk how ppl exist in this fandom who don't feel bad for him tbh #which is the last thing den wants bc being perceived as weak and pitiable is devastating to him but #chasing this mfer down to give him a hug #he is so. fucked up. he has been fucked up by every adult in his life. #i think the fandom perceives him as this spoiled rich kid who had it better than most of the gang but the reality is #he was failed just like the rest of them and it's almost worse because he doesn't – and almost CAN'T – recognize this #letting the protective ego-boosting and boasting drop leads to him having to confront SO much baggage and i don't think he is mentally able #i think he DOES know deep down that everything is a lie and he has been hurt because we see that self awareness in ptsdee and tends bar #but his relationship with everyone in the gang is so strained that i don't think he would be able to have a moment like charlie did in s15 #even in tends bar there's a moment where they all recognize something is going on with him but immediately place him at the center #because he's the problem with him. anything done to him is his fault. it's not only something he reinforces. the gang does too #this must be because *dennis* has no feelings and he hates valentines day because everyone else is unlike him which makes *him* mad #the entire gang has an issue placing blame on themselves but to not even be able to conceive of dennis being hurt by them is. telling #because he's inhuman to them. it's how he's propped himself up and yet simultaneously hopes that they will see through that act #the way he reworks things in his mind so that everything is a consequence of his grand plan #means that he is always at fault regardless of whether he brushes the blame off #so he is not a *victim* of anyone else. because this was all under his control. he wasn't raped because he was initiating it. #klinsky was His Conquest. he was fourteen and she was in her fifties but he forced himself on her so that makes it His Fault. #it was a two way road. he's fourteen. and he 'entered' her. he's fourteen. but she was uncomfortable with his advances. but he was fourteen #cw csa mention

[doomed-era]

one day i'll be able to tell you where gboh link and zelda's friendship goes...ONE DAY...

#i want them to be friends so badly but i was thinking about it in the shower and i'm like #link. would not put much effort into trying to fix their relationship and zelda basically lugging everything along trying desperately to #make it work? uh. well that's sort of. something. #at the same time though link at that point is not interested in developing friendships with anyone let alone zelda #who he is resentful/scared of #the idea of link eventually being able to see her as a person and not 'the princess' #and to be able to move past a relationship solely based on shared trauma comes to mind #because yeah they do need to move past the whole weird thing where they have trouble seeing each other beyond like. #the whole. savior/almost codependent bs thry have going on #zelda needs to move past her image of who she thought link was and again link needs to see her as a person who won't harm him #and it's going to be very neat but boy will it take effort #it's so unfair man link is far more likely to pursue a friendship with paya again 💔 #bc he knows her better than zelda and is like. genuinely curious/concerned about her where with zelda hes just not #but zelda wants to be friends with him sososo bad #and link will do what she says (halfheartedly) out of obligation while either being snide or standoffish grrrr #the pain the agony #be friends already!!!!!! #glider rambles

[queenangella]

someone tell me how to get actually close to people I just realized I haven’t done that with someone new in the last six years😭

#starting to think I actually have deep rooted intimacy issues hmmmm #I’ve said this to a few people btw and they were all like I mean yeah I could’ve told you that so…… #it’s like meeting people isn’t hard I very easily start talking to people and am always involved in at least a few clubs and we hang out a #lot but always in group #and then yesterday I met up with a friend and realised she’s the last person I’ve really let in and I met her six years ago and I know a lot #of people and have a lot of ‘friends’ but in ‘’ bc I only have three friends that I’m actually close close to #and it’s not really that I don’t want meaningful relationships with people it’s that somehow whenever someone takes the initiative to want #to get to know me better I get so freaked out I usually ghost them which I know is very bad but I don’t know how to do anything else #so anyway this is an apology for everyone who’s ever tried to get to know me it’s not you it’s me really needing to find a therapist again #I guess

[hexplaything]

happy two years to the worst decision i've made in my two decades alive and probably the worst decision i'll have made for the rest of it too

sorry for the big ass vent in the tags feel free to ignore it

#mourning who i was before two years ago. and all the things i lost throughout the relationship #the parts of me i lost and have had to find #the pieces im still trying to pick up #and the fact that i'm like a rabid dog when it comes to socializing #i hate that i have fond memories i cant stop thinking about #i hate myself for wishing i could go back to those good times because i know what else awaited me during those times and i was ultimately #miserable. and eating the scraps of her love she would give in between the emotional abuse #i just wish i could feel the good stuff again and i wish i believed it was even real #i've been thinking abt stuff more than usual and it sucks #i really just wish i never met her or dated her #like genuinely. not being loved at all is better than love that is tainted and hurtful #i hate it bc. i feel like a kid who had candy shoved in their face and then had it taken away from them #that's the same analogy i always go to. i always just feel like a kid being treated unfairly and i hate it #i wish i felt like an adult #i hate that sometimes i can only describe my feelings as akin to a child's feelings #i want to be an adult so bad i want to feel like an adult and have normal emotions

[jvzebel-x]

🦋

#when i was growing up my mom Only gave me incredibly inappropriate advice lmao. #i was raised by my toxic high school best friend-- except she was like that my whole life lmao. #she told me once to corner this girl i had problems w in the bathroom during class one day&beat the fuck out of her #&if i did to call my mom before i did it so she could call school&tell them she was taking me the period before so i had an alibi lmao. #she gossiped about me to my friends when she was angry w me-- something that actually ruined my life in a real way #when she was angry at me so she told a friend of mine i was cheating on my boyfriend at the time so that 'friend' told him #(she just wanted him to know he deserved better&she was there for him if he needed someone to talk to :)) #&he beat me almost to death+threw me off the back of his motorcycle lmao. #when i mentioned that he thought i was cheating on him to my mom bc of a friend telling him i was my moms immediate response was to #deny vehemently that she has anything at all to do w it-- something i had not thought of until right then&realized the time my then bf #thought i cheated on him my mom was the only person who knew i had gone out. shed actually threatened to tell him herself #bc i was out bc i was arguing w her at the time lmao. #every memory i have of that woman makes me feel queasy lmao. #every time she yelled at me&told me i was depressing&i ruined everything w my horrible attitude. #the time she told me she didnt want to wait for me while i was limping up stairs bc she was in a bad mood&we were late for a movie #she wanted to see so she literally stomped her foot before yelling at me to hurry up lmao. #every time she called me selfish&cruel&insisted that the problem in every relationship i had was me #ESP the relationship i had w her. #i miss my mom sometimes. i hate my mom a lot of the time. #but more than anything i am just so fucking grateful she's out of my life. #i dont think ive changed a whole lot at my core throughout my life but im absolutely positive cutting her out of my life made it possible #for me to be a better person just in general.

[vaugarde]

Was about to go “Hm I should make proper family headcanons for my PMD canon partners” But remembered that two of them have established history in canon already and the third is my Shinx partner who I default to “They were part of the Luxio Tribe” for. So really Chip is the only one I can just make up a family for djfjfjfng

#tbh tho explorers partner just always gave me the vibe that they are not in contact with their parents #idk why theres not exactly w ton of evidence towards that but its what ive stuck to #even when vulpix was my assigned canon partner i still put her on bad terms with her family and still gave her conflicting feelings at home #anyways. chip just lives back home with his mom and brothers #his dad is off being a famous explorer and not acknowledging that he has kids anymore. sorry chip #… why is it that despite being the youngest child that i keep giving eldest child syndrome to my characters #echoed voice #pmd posting #i dont know if ill properly design elliotts parents but obviously they were a samurott and a swoobat #dont have anything in mind for them except for maybe a postgame idea where xey meet one of them finally? #and theyve maybe improved as a person and now that their kid is an adult they want to have some kind of relationship #and elliott. gives them a chance because xey dont want to hold grudges or anything but xey don’t acknowledge them as a parent #at best they just become a shopkeeper at paradise. emolga and virizion are the ones who hold the grudge #maybe eris too but hes also just tired at that point and acknowledges that its an attempt to be better #so hes definitely more civil #psmd partner. could have had bio parents that abandoned them ig bc reincarnation but i always imagined they just spawned into existence #like already hatched and curled in the scarves #and she has carracosta so idc much abt bio parents. the important bit is that he is pops #maybe if i decide to go with a totally different team for explorers ill do something different but idk djfjfjf #im half tempted to use the new starter rom i downloaded and use sprigatito and popplio tbh djdjfjfjfjf #but i also like playing it physically on my 3ds #and idk how to put romhacks on a physicsl cartridge #physical

[hella1975]

feel free to ignore this if you feel like it's too personal, but i just wanted to say that reading some of the posts you've made about your relationship with your mother has really like. helped? in a weird way? bc i know everyone's experience is different but my mum has always treated me as if i'm somehow fundamentally bad in a way my siblings aren't, and it can be so so hard to cope with feeling like the one person who is meant to know you best is convinced that you're actually a terrible person. so reading your posts where you mention something sort of similar to that (not exactly the same but near enough) is really really reassuring bc i've been following you for ages and you seem like a really sweet and protective person and it's like (weirdly) 'okay, if other people have that experience too maybe it's not just me and maybe i'm not the worst, actually' lol

this is actually such a touching ask to receive! to date my relationship with my mum is the most complicated relationship ive ever had with a person and i honestly wholeheartedly believe that will never change even if i have a family. she's such a complex, tortured woman and she has such a temper and she's said such awful things to me, but we're also complete mirrors of each other. growing up my mum recurringly says she thought she was 'mad and bad' - that's a phrase of hers she uses a lot. mad and bad and here i am feeling all those things she felt and it's heartbreaking because oftentimes she's the reason i feel that way, or i feel that way and she makes me feel worse. im constantly torn between guilt and shame and anger, or love so strong i cry over it. it's taken me a long time to accept i will always feel these emotions for my mother and through it she's my favourite person in the world as well as the person who can hurt me worse than anyone, and knowing you're not alone in that, that it doesn't make you a bad child to acknowledge these things, is really reassuring so thank you x

#even answering this ask made me feel guilty bc me and my mum have been getting on really well atm #and when we're getting on we get on so well like idc if it's biased i do genuinely believe we have a stronger connection than most #but god she just gets so angry and even when we get on i cant just forget the things she's said to me #she spent the entirety of my first year of uni making me feel like i was a fundamentally cold person who was bad at loving #and coming from the person who - like you said - is supposed to know me better than anyone it killed me to hear #and it's something im going to spend possibly the rest of my life insecure about even though she's not said it in months #it's so unfair and i hate myself for holding onto things and then i get angry at her for expecting me to let them go #she has no idea how much i value her opinion like i WANT to impress her and make her proud #im killing myself over this economics degree and i didnt HAVE to do it but i knew it would make her happy so i did #bc the thought of doing a degree that disappointed her (at a time when my sister was doing great) terrified me #idk relationships between mothers and children are such landmines #there's resentment and rage there but there's so so much love #ask

[zo1nkss]

I had to stay at my mom's last night bc I couldn't figure out another option but I'm currently waiting for the bus into the town I take the greyhound home from so update: I'm not okay(physically I'm fine) but I'm at least out of there.

Anyway I have a 2 hour wait out here in the cold so if anyone wants to help me distract myself that would be grand :/

#she tried arguing with me about it again and when I politely and calmly asked to stop discussing it while I'm trying to figure out #a way home she got mad so I left bc I'm not going to let her berrate me iver and fucking iver like this #saying i'm making threats by saying I can't mend a relationship where my boundaries are not respected #being told I'm not allowed to set them because my mom wants to talk about whatever and never tells me when she's not comfortable #with a topic I brought up #despite me telling her numerous times I was happy to end a discussion she didn't like #I literally have done everything I possibly can #I wanted things to be better so bad but they got fucking worse

[oatbugs]

update on gf situation btw . for those who r curious or sent asks etc

#v soon after i asked for advice i talked to her and asked her why she doesnt draw anymore n abt other stuff etc etc #she basically said she doesnt feel at all content rn but she will start again once she feels better . which is so understandable #and im also glad to hear she still does love what she loved etc...just several factors in her life are making her . discontent atm #one of them (i think a big one maybe) is me being gone for like a month . we stayed w each other a lot b4 this #so the wait has been Agonising for both of us and i just didnt realise how much she missed me . which is like . idk . shes so sweet i love #her so much and while im sad my absence is contributing to her current situation im like. woah...there is someone who misses me so much.wow #i also need to like tripple clarify bc my post asking for advice was vague and i feel like it was misinterpreted a lot : #my gf is not confused abt what she wants to do + i am not using romantic relationships as a career progression device + i do in fact have #friends and a life outside academia and am aware that i too could just as easily become disconent w my work #life etc or even lose all my passion for whatever reason + i do not in fact . only love my gf for her art. i love her for everything she is #which includes smn who is very passionate abt art which is why i was concerned etc etc . anyway #we talked abt it and i now understand things more and also will hold her through it until she feels more content again #and then ill keep holding her through everything good and bad for as long as i can :) i love her sosososososo much #and also i miss her so much and if i dont see her soon ill Perish and Die . anyway

[dashiellqvverty]

general warning that this post is about like serious topics and references csa/inappropriate relationships but anyway

we NEED to stop sucking pete wentz’s dick (especially in the context of propping him up over shitty guys from other bands) like. he very much did “date” a 15 year old when he was 23. like he did do that. i’m not trying to claim i’m perfect or anything like i literally still listen to fall out boy (i’m becoming more and more uncomfortable with that but like i’m dealing with that personally and stuff) i’m not here to tell you what you can and can’t do. but i am really sick of people presenting him as morally superior to other band men or just worshipping him in general

#a lot of people have tried very hard to prove it wasn’t actually that bad or she wasn’t that young #and i wanted to believe that but as j found out recently #the woman was on a podcast a couple years ago (about something completely different) #but was talking about her life and stuff and she didn’t mention him by name #but talked about getting into a deeply toxic and damaging relationship with a 23 year old when she was 15 and was like ‘obviously looking #back now i have a better understanding of how bad that is’ #and you know. there’s nothing else she could’ve been talking about #anyway like i said i was very willing to be convinced it was maybe not that bad but like. it is. #something i see come up a lot is that it’s like baseless accusations and it’s antiblack to constantly bring them up #and the thing is there are no accusations. she has never accused him of anything he was just publicly dating her!!!!!! #i don’t think it was super public or known until she was a little older but it wasn’t a secret. she’s mentioned in rolling stone. #HOWEVER i only ever see it brought up on posts/tiktoks by black creators talking about the fact that he’s black #like literally that’s the only time i’ve ever seen ANYONE talk about it in the past few years #which i think IS a problem. like it speaks to larger antiblackness and racism towards these creators that that’s the only time #it gets brought up #but everywhere i go it is just constant dick sucking and it already didn’t sit well with me when i thought it was maybe not As Bad #but it is and i am just sick of only being vague about it or not posting about it #csa mention #i never want to post about this bc i don’t want to be The Person responsible for breaking to people or whatever #i have put off posting anything about this for SO long like i saw so much comparing him to brendon as the better alternative #on tiktok and stuff #and i was like tiktok is not the place for this. but i just. it is hard to watch people post about him like he has never done anything #wrong in his life ever.

[lost-in-the-planetarium]

sometimes system things is finding and stalking our exes tumblr while drunk while brain gays yell at you to stop okay like NO I GET IT IT MADE ME FEEL WORSE I EXPECTED THIS

#dissociative system #plural system #system #system stuff #system things #plural #traumagenic system #system memes #alters #actually traumagenic #🔭????? #🔭🪲 #planetary system is drunk and nauseous #i hate her for what she did to my headmates but i also want her to want me bc IM INSANE #headmates are lowkey traumatized by them but i just wish i could ask why it all changed so fast #i love ramona so goddamn much but girlypop is really strict on this don't text our ex thing #too drunk to finish my fucking cigarette also #idk i'm drunk don't look at me #DONT READ THESE TAGS SHIT IS HAPPENING #me when me and all my sourcemates are trauma hodlers for this one past relationship but i STILL want to text her every time i'm drunk #people keep tell me awful things about her and she WAS not good to me but she wasn't.. that bad. i don't know what to believe but.. i think #i think it's true and i fucking hate that because a variety of reason but ALSO if it's true it was happening while i was dating her #as if having this ant parts from one person (at least to some extent) is a BAD SIGN #how to tell if there's things i can't remember (i think there is TEHEH I CANT DEAL WITH THIS) #can my ex give me a list of every fucked up thing they did to me pleas #lisa can you FUCKING CHILL don't brush it all off. you don't want the awful ways she made me feel promise #our system tried so hard for someone who repeatedly showed not giving any shits about us. i got front stuck for several fucking weeks #over this fucking person yoh are NOT texting them i don't care how misconstrued everyone else's stories might be coming #YOU DESERVE BETTER WE DESERVE BETGER SORRY FOR GETTING YOU DRUNK STOP DRINKIM GO TO SLEEP IRS ALMSOT 5 AM -🌸 #🔭🌸

[snekdood]

#fave #videos #thank yoooooooou #you get it #characters arent people and people arent characters #people irl deserve redemption. characters dont need to have redemption and sometimes its hurtful to the story if they do #i COULD make a redemption arc for zero-- but it would be stupidly complicated within my characters relationships given whats hes done in #the past. plenty of my ocs still would never want to be in the same room with him. it just adds unnecessary coffee au drama thats just not #the focus of my story at all. and hes not even a real person. hes an idea- an amalgamation of bad experiences I and others have had #manifested into one being that seeks to inflict these pains #likely his redemption arc would come from no longer being a vampire. but idk where he would go. and i really dont care to write it tbh #i have other minor antagonists I think would be better suited for a redemption arc than him. hes just done too much shit. #just in the same way a lot of azula stans would say ozai is irredeemable thats how I feel about zero. #and its how I feel about azula too tbh. yeah her story is sad and its possible to sympathize with but shes like a machine at this point #her humanity has been stripped away by her abusive father- and I dont think it would serve the narrative to have her suddenly appear #in a therapists office and crying about her trauma or whatever. #in this video he mentions how some ppl think its more 'realistic' to have her redeemed but... i really dont think it is bud #clearly you have not dealt with an azula in your real life. they're impossible to get along with and MOST people stop interacting w them. #they do end up isolated and alone bc of their actiosn. even if those actions are informed by a complex abuse system. #its sad but its also an important story to tell so people can at least maybe see themselves going down that route and stop themselves #characters help give examples to people of what would've happened if they made this or that choice. and thats the purpose azulas narrative #shows. irl people deserve a second chance and thats why we make these stories so they can know to try to avoid acting a certain way that #will only in the end harm their chance at a second chance. #not that its impossible- just that less people will be willing to go along w you on it than there would've been before you fell down hard

[desert-gays]

mind the empty bottle with the holes along the bottom, you see its too much to ask for and i am not the doctor

read the tags for some character lore haha

#my art #artists on tumblr #fnv oc #brian sturges #<- it has been apparently three years since i last posted art of him! #i am in the midst of um. recontextualizing his and boones relationship? #i uh. think they are bad for each other and it eventually ends up in a breakup #should i elaborate #although boone is nice to him because he views brian as filler for carla #brian lets himself be enamored bc after a long string of directly bad abusive relationships #boone bombs his relationships both with brian and ty when he tells them about bittersprings #brian is a bleeding heart but i think he shoves away his thoughts on boone being a soldier bc when he warms up to him hes nice #while brian isnt from vegas he still represents that glamour and wealth. especially when he talks about the comforts he misses #these tags got out of order bc mobile sucks. anyway #hes nice because he sees a carla shaped filler #which is. super fucked. #but brian likes him treating him so nicely because its the first time in a long time to have someone romantically pursue him that way #or at least it feels that way to him #i think even before the bittersprings bombshell is dropped it becomes apparent to him that boone does not see him as equal #and holds him up to this high standard based around the idea of his dead wife that exists in his head #brian still goes along because he tells himself that he'd rather be seen highly and be codependant than outright abused... right... #but of course its very bad for him in entirely different ways #he spent this time going against his better judgement to allow boone to pursue him bc he convinced himself that he wanted this #and now that he has what he thinks he wanted he keeps trying to pump the breaks #so he becomes quiet and agreeable bc that worked in the abusive relationships why wouldnt it work for this ''''healthy'''' one #ty notices because shes been his best friend for like a decade. he knows that she knows theyre on a shared wavelength like that #but since theyre always in a group on the move theres hardly ever a beat where its just the two of them to talk about it #which also like im not gonna get into tys relationship with boone in these tags but its also very complicated #after bittersprings it all comes falling down though brian cant let himself be agreeable anymore #ive been thinking abt this for a while as ive become more of a boone hater

[yoharrysaidshe]

.

#i know two schizophrenic people and one of them being literally the worst person i've ever met and in my life is kinda wild to think about #the other person i love her i really do and i wish i had the energy to help her rn but i don't #i'm at a breaking point #like yall don't and will never understand mental illness until you see how severely it affects the person and everyone aroun them #like this shit is UGLY relationship destroying life ruining pathogen type beat i hate it here so bad #like the quality of life is abysmal #i wonder how it is to not have to deal with it must be heaven on earth #sorry just wanted to vent and this is kind of barely coherent #thoughts #also the resources to help ppl like this are practically nonexistent and this country needs to burn #at every turn it's been apathetic beaucracy and incompetency #if you don't have monu they said fuck you and die #we gotta burn this place #and honestly it just feels like a bunch of judgement for not draling with the circumstances better sympathetic condolences #and glad-that's-not-me's #really sucks to be us energy fr rn :// #all or our youth is passing us by and its just... beyond our control #mum's wailing in her room in utter despair bc mentally ill sister got evicted bc she's been swiping ppl's packages from their front doors #for months #really wanna d1e #i love the former person this i mainly about (sister) but most days if not every day i hate her is the god's honest truth #but also i get why she's here and how she's got there and relate to a lot of her hatred of everyone and everything including herself but ya #there's too much there #and i'm not strong enough for forgiveness and neither is she #so she's on the streets god knows where with a fucking dog and she's gonna appear tomorrow morning again and ofc we'll let her in #sigh #my sobriety was kinda nice for the last 7 months it lasted