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sugurusdiscordmoderator · 6 months

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Gamer Girly - part 1

modern AU • suguru geto x reader

reader, geto, & friends are all the same age around 20 in 2017 or so

You found yourself getting into video games once you got to college. You got a boyfriend your freshman year shortly after getting to school and not adjusting to the distance from home. He wouldn’t stop bothering you about one date so you finally gave in, and ended up sort of liking how nerdy and clingy he was. He stayed in the dorms a lot, playing a wide variety of video games and you weren’t looking to go meet people by yourself, so you just stayed with him. You learned some things and on the rare occasion - he’d let you play. Mostly concerned about you messing up his progress, he let you try games like Fortnite, Fall Guys, Lego Star Wars, Fallout, and GTA.

Once sophomore year came around you had made a good amount of friends on campus and joined a few clubs. One of them being the e-sports club, but your boyfriend insisted he didn’t want to be in a club or be friends with “those type of people.” Being a decently attractive girl, you turned quite a few heads as you became well acquainted with the members of the club. You sat by a girl named Utahime who seemed nice enough and you chatted about types of games you like.

A lot of the meeting was people talking about their scores and goals, their Twitch and Discord content and throwing out their usernames to try to get a few more follows. As a relatively new gamer, you hadn’t previously used Twitch or Discord, but you had watched a few streams on tiktok and YouTube. You decided to download the apps on your phone and check them out when you got home.

As you walk into your boyfriends apartment after the meeting, you know he has his headset on and can’t hear you coming from where he is in his bedroom. You always were wary of this because of course you don’t want to scare him, but this time his tone seems different.

“Yeah man, she’s just changed. She’s trying so hard to be someone she’s not and wants to be the most popular girl on campus or some shit,” he groans to his friends and you can sense him rolling his eyes. You still near the door of his room to see who he is talking about and if he’ll spill more.

“No, Toji, I’m telling you she changed. She’s started drinking and trying to be girly. She got her nails painted pink and bought one of those annoying-ass pink cat ear headsets for her setup.”

Your jaw drops, looking down at your manicures bubblegum pink nails that you splurged on for some self care the week before classes started. He’s complaining to his deadbeat friend Toji about you. You still try to give him the benefit of the doubt and continue to listen while pulling out your phone and starting a video so you have evidence of him saying this.

“Man, I’m just saying that I don’t think she’s worth being tied down to anymore. Yeah her head is amazing but I can only handle so much. I’m sure she’s throwing herself at other guys in-between classes anyways.”

Your eyes start to water. You’ve been dating for 9 months and this is how he feels about you? Sure, you didn’t think you would get married, but you at least didn’t think he’d objectify and talk about you behind your back.

You leave his spare key on the counter and walk out the door with a slam, not caring if he heard or not. Ending the video and wiping your eyes you start the walk back to your apartment a few blocks away. As you’re passing your favorite coffee shop/bakery you see Utahime walk out, with a fruity pink drink that looks refreshing.

She says “hey y/n!” before she sees your slightly puffy eyes and distraught demeanor. You give the usual “white person smile” as you would to a stranger making unusually long eye contact in the grocery store before looking back down at your feet. She jogs a little to catch up to you and asks if you have plans for the evening, not wanting to pry into your personal matters (for now) as she just met you tonight.

“I was just on my way back to my apartment, I was going to check out some Twitch streams I think seeing as everyone in the club meeting was talking about it,” you say trying to fake a good attitude the best you can.

“Would you be interested in coming over to my place to do that? I think I may have a little more experience than you and I’d be happy to show you some of my favorite streamers!” Utahime grins and you have a hard time saying no, as you need to make some more friends to fill up the time your soon-to-be ex had taken up in your life.

“Sure, I can swing by my place and grab some wine if you’re interested,” you respond with a slight grin, eyebrows raised.

You and Utahime walk for a few minutes, realizing you live in the same building just a few floors apart from each other so you had never met. You grab your laptop, two bottles of wine, and your vape from your apartment before you head over to hers. Not before you take a moment to rip 2 photos of you and your boyfriend off the fridge.

“Pink or white?” You ask Utahime.

“Hmmm, whatever you don’t want,” she smiles back as you both settle on to her couch with her holding two wine glasses.

You glance down to the cheap bottles, the best you can get since you’re only 19. You hand her the rosé and opt to keep the Sauvignon Blanc for yourself. Ignoring the wine glass she set for you on the coffee table, you crack the screw top open and take a swig from the bottle.

She puts on an adult animated tv show on in the background and starts to show you her twitch, discord, and steam profiles. You notice you have a similar liking for games and she adds you as a friend on pretty much every social media and gaming platform. Her bubbly chatter takes your mind off your shitty boyfriend and so does the half of bottle of wine you’ve drank.

She helps you create your discord and twitch, making your username the same as your gamer tag already “sillygoose69”. Yeah sure, it’s a little immature but you’re not the most creative and wanted to be a little funny. Utahime gets a notification on her phone and gasps, “oh my god, my favorite streamer just got one we have to watch. I’m sorry but he’s just so beautiful.”

She opens up her own computer and logs in to show a beautiful man that is just starting up his stream and getting situated. He has a man bun with a little piece of bang sticking out. (you haven’t really seen a man wear his hair like that but hell, it’s working for him) he’s scanning the chat saying good evening and has the most adorable smile and silky voice.

Utahime’s voice snaps you out of your infatuation with the man and says “I know right?!” Realizing you blushed over a random ass man you giggle and say “Wow he’s like perfect?!”

“Just wait till you see his gaming, dear lord,” she groans.

“I’m just waiting for Gojo, Shoko, and Nanami to join the party and then were going to play some no builds.” The man says, whose username is “cursed_monkey_420”. You smirk at the thought of someone else having a hard time creating their gamer tag.

You log in and give him your first follow on Twitch and join his discord. Adding a cute profile picture of you holding up a piece sign from a beach trip over the summer, thinking ‘could he possibly notice me?’.

You can’t help but be a little crazy, you haven’t seen a guy like him around but maybe that’s because your deadbeat boyfriend was holding you back.

You take the last few swigs of your bottle of wine and look at Utahime.

“After the meeting this afternoon I accidentally walked in on my boyfriend talking shit about me.”

Her jaw drops at how casually you say it, refilling her wine glass so she just had emptied her bottle as well. “Fuck him,” she says and then hits your vape.

You nod, “I took a video as evidence, left his key on his kitchen counter, and am thinking about just blocking him on everything and ghosting him.” You say smugly wondering if that is too psychotic.

You hear the stream in the background still warming up as @ cursed_monkey_420 says “thank you for the follow sillygoose69! Nice username,” and he snickers, you can’t tell if that was sarcasm or not.

Utahime raises her eyebrows at you and shrugs. “I’m not one to give relationship advice but it seems like you’re handling it well so maybe you should just ghost him.”

You check your phone notifications for the first time since arriving at her house and see a missed call from your now ex and a text saying “do we need to talk?”

You text back, “no we don’t need to talk ever again. thank you for wasting 9 months of mine, I hope the head was worth it.”

You hit send grimacing at his words from earlier and take a screenshot of the chat, then proceeding to block his phone number, Snapchat, Instagram, and Facebook.

“You good?” Utahime questions as you’ve been silently on your phone for a few minutes looking pretty devious. You show her the texts and him being blocked and she throws her head back with a laugh.

At this point the so called Nanami, Shoko, and Gojo have joined the stream and they load into their squad fortnite game.

They’re pretty good but more than anything, they are absolutely hilarious. The type of people you’d love to spend an evening with. They call the original host of the stream “Geto” and engage with the chat while getting a battle royale win. The girl, Shoko, is probably the best of the 4 with Nanami definitely not wanting to be a part of this but somehow got dragged along. It seems like Gojo may be the ringleader of sorts but Geto is the most sincere, friendly, mild tempered. You look him up on Instagram and give him a follow there as well, just to see his pretty face some more. You doubt he’d notice, with over 15,000 followers.

You notice yourself yawning and start packing up your things, drunk Utahime stalking all Geto’s accounts and sprawled on the couch. “I’ll see you around soon?” You ask her. She nods, “yes! Do you wanna get lunch this weekend?” You look back as you open the door, “sure! Just text me.”

—

A/N: time skip : about 9 months, the summer between sophomore and junior year

reader is about 4 months from turning 21.

In the past school year, a lot has happened.

Well hindsight not that much but it has felt like it! You starting tuning into Geto’s streams every evening, even buying a tshirt from his merch collection. Utahime started dating a guy from the esports club who really is a great guy but meant she couldn’t obsess over Geto anymore. The less the merrier??

You dyed part of your hair pink, started smoking a bit of weed in your free time, and mostly played video games with Utahime and her boyfriend Haibara. You three got really good and entered some local competitions and did really well.

Since you didn’t have school to focus on, you were a lot more active on discord and in Geto’s fan community. On a late night stream he said he was looking for a moderator now that he’s getting bigger in the community and that there was a way to apply through his page. You texted Utahime, who you knew was watching.

‘do you think I should do it?’

‘girl if you don’t I won’t forgive you.’

‘fine. starting it now. can I list you as a reference?? lol jk’

‘Haibara said maybe you’ll be able to have your own streaming channel if you get good’

You stare at your phone screen with your nose turned up. ‘I don’t want to be a streamer, do you see how the men objectify Shoko?’

‘ah yes. because being objectified is worse than making shit tons of money.’

You leave Utahime on read after that last text and work on the application not really taking it seriously.

About a week later you get a notification saying, “cursed_monkey_420 has sent you a message”

Your eyes just about pop out of your head and you send Utahime a screenshot of your Lock Screen.

‘Hi sillygoose (: I reviewed your moderator application and would love to chat if you have some time!’

‘omg hi! that’s awesome, feel free to text me if that works best for you? - y/n xxx-xxx-xxxx’

You set your phone down expecting to get a text eventually as you clean your kitchen when your phone starts vibrating from a phone number you don’t have saved. It’s a local area code to your college so you figure you should answer it anyways.

“Hello?” You answer in a sing songy voice

“Hi, is this y/n?” You instantly recognize his voice and nearly drop your phone.

“Yeah- yeah, It’s me!” Trying best to keep some composure you sit on your couch holding the phone.

“Hey, it’s so nice to speak with you. I received your application and well I must say I’m a little surprised someone like you would be interested.”

You pause for a second, confused, “why would someone like me not be interested?”

“Because you seem so normal and not the gaming type,” he says pretty matter of factly.

You scoff, “please, I’ve watched your streams like every day for the past 9 months.” Suddenly realizing how embarrassing that sounds your cheeks turn red but nobody is there to see them.

“Oh I know.”

“You know…?”

“Of course, I thought your username was cute and just happened to remember it. And you like all of my Instagram posts.” His voice is so smooth, he is just so painfully attractive and smooth. Meanwhile, you couldn’t flirt if your life depended on it and are mortified by his awareness.

“Oh yeah that’s me,” you awkwardly chuckle trying to stay calm.

“Listen, I think you’d be great for this role, would you want to have a private zoom meeting with me to go over everything?”

“I would love that,” you say probably too eagerly, and he lets out what sounds like a sigh of relief.

“I’ll text you my availability and you let me know what works for you,” he says and you think you hear Gojo in the background screaming about ice cream or something.

“That sounds great!”

“Thank you y/n, I’ll talk with you soon.”

Oh my god. He said your name. Your first name. It sounded like sweet silky honey and sent shivers down your spine. Did you just get horny from a two minute phone call?

master list for other parts

ty for reading, reblogs appreciated 💜

#geto suguru #jjk #geto x reader #jujutsu geto #gojo satoru #shoko ieiri #nanami kento #jjk x reader #utahime iori #jujutsu kaisen #out of context discord #jjk x reader smut #geto #geto smut #jjk smut #jjk men

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grumpy-triceratops · 5 months

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If you want, here’s a free infodump card for the hero/villain thing you were talking about earlier.

I'm going to take a swing and assume this is about my oc stuff, if not, whoopsie. Either way, thank you so much for this ask I really appreciate it!! This may get long so I'll keep it under a read more.

So I never mentioned in my last post that the name of this story is Starfall Isle because that's the name of the location where the story takes place (side note: I did have to change it because this ask made me realize I should look it up and initially I was going to call it Starfall Isles but that's the name of a location in Flight Rising so I dropped the s). However while I have been thinking about this idea more since the last ask I still don't have a lot of stuff I feel concretely about. I would like it to have some kind of end goal but overall it would be more similar to superhero cartoons where it can be kind of episodic but a bigger plot can start to build up along the way.

The main character's name is currently Kailani Sparks and her hero name is Knight Star. As the name implies she has star related powers such as making stars she can walk and fly on (all Kirby-esque), as well as star-shaped blasts, transforming changes some aspects of her physical appearance as well such as her hair color and the way it glows (though to what degree/duration I have not decided). Her powers will also develop in various ways as the story goes on. Kailani can be a bit bumbling and ditzy but she has a really good heart and fast reflexes and she will fight you if she has to!

The character I talked about previously is now named Sapphira Reylin (though I am still wavering a bit on her last name) and her hero name is still Cross Rozen. I've started to define her powers a little bit more, she has her demonic form she can transform into, she also has fire and plant related powers (I'm not sure if I want her to be able to element bend them or if its just something she can generate and wield) and with her fire powers comes a bit of a fire resistance, she can also create swords/daggers.

One of the main villains is named Inevitable, she appears in amorphous forms to conceal her identity. Her powers involve her being able to change states of matter, I may have it also that she can change a target's weight and/or how gravity affects it but I don't know since I don't want her to be too overpowered. Personality wise she's very impish and loves toying with others especially Knight Star. Inevitable is also very influential often plotting and playing a hand in the villainous underground. I have some ideas on her civilian life but not many and they'd be secrets anyways since I don't want to give away everything on the chance I hopefully make this a comic or something one day!

Another prominent though less imposing villain is Marsupialia. Her powers allow her to take on the traits from any marsupial she can think of, she doesn't fully transform into the animals but it does influence the way her suit appears as well as give her the ears, tail and claws of the corresponding animal and possibly other traits unique to certain species. I almost forgot to mention that regardless of form her powers include: heightened smell and hearing, as well as her pouch ability. This power allows her to turn any bag into a pocket dimension however she can't put in anything that wouldn't otherwise fit into the bag's opening, so like she couldn't take a car but if it fits it shifts (into her pocket dimension). Marsupialia like Inevitable can be a bit cheeky and likes to mess around with Knight Star, but unlike Inevitable who has a cat and mouse dynamic with Knight Star, Marsupiala has more of a cat annoying another cat type relationship, speaking of: she also is more of a cat burglar type villain. I know a bit more about her civilian self but again, secret.

Then I just have variously fleshed out ideas for other heroes and villains mostly just ideas for powers I think would be interesting such as origami, scissors and plush related abilities. So yeah its a lot of just shifting vibes for these characters and this story but the more I think about it the more I'd like to try and solidify these ideas, so again I appreciate having an excuse to think about it!!

#asks #ocs #oc stuff #now you oc me now you don't #starfall isle #I know I'm responding late but this ask got me thinking so critically about this story #also I got distracted a lot #I really need to get to drawing some of these ideas

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onaperduamedee · 1 year

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Notes on Lord of Chaos

You do not want to go into a 90-page long prologue and read “Demandred.” That said, this introductory chapter felt very much like a “previously on”, which is all the more bizarre that at this point Robert Jordan was publishing one book a year, a feat of writing if there ever is one.

I did suspect Marigan because Moghedien turned Birgitte into a child which was very left field. That’s a nice touch.

When Nynaeve noted that losing her hate for Moiraine was like losing a part of herself… That’s it. I need to be writing/reading Nyn/Moi fanfic right now.

Digging Nyn and Elayne as PhD students only flimsily supervised and lying about their subject: they are literally handling war criminals and weapons of mass destruction for giggles. It’s the most fun I’ve had with them together so far.

Considering the time period, Jordan understood and deconstructed quite well how patriarchy affects and hurts men, but does not grasp nearly as well how it affects and hurts women, and it is so bizarre given his whole premise. The women in his universe are plagued with the same kind of violence and micro-aggressions as in our universe despite supposedly being the norm and authority.

Semirraghe already has all my gay attention. She is terrifying.

The fact that the Forsaken are out on the hunt for angreal, when we know Aes Sedai of old have been trying for thousands of years to keep them hidden, is very much QED. I am loving the attention to detail.

Davram Bashere is so right though. Rand's obsession with learning the sword is mostly an attempt at running from who he is, even if it's also an exercise to settle his mind. Combined with his refusal of support, it emphasizes how much he is hurting himself and fighting himself.

Rand calling Mat illiterate is the funniest line in the book, I am sorry.

Rand accidentally insulting an old lady by talking about her youth as history is also very funny.

Loving him connecting the dots about Tigraine and Shaiel. He has grown so sharp and savvy.

Rand telling he will not trust Aes Sedai but will use them is so so good. That's exactly what they think of him as well. At the end of the day, Lews Therin was an Aes Sedai, and Rand is one, even is he gives a different name to male Aes Sedai.

Rand's inner monologue being so Moirainesque is everything. It's beyond mesmerising to see him apprehend male channelers like Moiraine did him. Her ghost really lingers.

Davram Bashere is immensely cool, and Mazrim Tain is so overtly untrustworthy. Rand, please be careful.

Mat aka "is this army propaganda in your pocket or are you just happy to see me ?" He continues to be the most dynamic of the lot, but I wish he wasn’t so tied to armies and wars because it bores me.

So the bond is actually a weave that didn't exist in the Age of Legends? Much to think about.

Neither Elayne nor Nynaeve are very good teachers tbh. Nynaeve and Elayne have every right to be annoyed they have to teach Aes Sedai Tel'aran'rhiod, but given their own laborious start, their attitude is bloody immature. And I say this as someone whose job involves teaching older people new technologies.

Elayne and Nynaeve: Aes Sedai are insufferable for constantly wanting to know business not concerning them

Elayne and Nynaeve: do exactly that, all the time

Siuan playing cat's cradle while spying on the Aes Sedai, I love her so much. She isn’t here as much as I want to but how evident a presence she is! She is such an expert at adapting to the situation and knowing how to present herself to others.

The Trolloc nightmare was excellent and clarified some rules I have been wondering about. Loved the complicity between Siuan and Elayne too. In general, I am having such a blast with Siuan growing closer to the girls. If this is glimpse into what kind of teacher she was as an Accepted, she must have been a good one. Despite others seeing her as imposing, she is truly gifted at drawing people in.

All that talk about Rand not falling for Elaida's ploy tells me he's going to do exactly that.

In truth, I find Mat's attitude of "Rand is who he is" much more anchored in reality than Nyn's "I recall when I spanked him as a child." There is no coming back to the boy he was; it doesn’t mean he can’t still experience love or joy as he is now. Trying to resuscitate that boy will only hurt him, but seeing him as a person now, as he is, despite the creeping madness that is part of him, could make such a difference.

Alanna bonding Rand all of a sudden was so bloody violent and unexpected? But also kudos to RJ for showing just after why she did what she did, unstable and scared as she is.

I do not trust Mazrim Taim and his incel army: sweet concept, still a shell that will blow up in Rand's face.

Egwene running into and not recognizing Leane and Siuan in Tel’aran’rhiod had me giggling. I cannot wait for them to meet again.

Oh, cool, just another female character's POV ruined by insipid romance.

I actually love the Salidar Aes Sedai. I think it's quite easy for Nynaeve and Elayne to criticise a group of people trying to set up another White Tower with its entire ancillary community, while also plotting to go to war with the White Tower and reaching out to Rand, when the girls are always off adventuring and fleeing. Elayne will rule Andor and Nynaeve certainly Malkier, yet their approach to responsibility is flimsy at best. Elayne has the excuse of youth, but Nynaeve was a Wisdom before this all started and I am not enjoying them in their ninny era.

Berelain! Defending women's right to learn the sword! Hell yeah! I love Berelain, she’s hyper-competent and unfazed while everyone (and the narrative) is frankly despicable to her. She’s this universe Elle Woods.

Awwwwww, Rand's schools. That's genuinely lovely. I love the dichotomy of Rand creating a school to turn men into weapons (something that will absolutely not lead to escalade and senseless deaths) and another to build and invent a new Age (even if again weapons).

Sorilea can scram with that creepy trad wife shit. Leave Aviendha alone.

Was the Maiden handtalk mentioned before? I cannot remember, but now it’s everywhere.

The Ogier chapter was so good. Liah’s disappearance was actually creepier than the venture in Shadar Logoth from the EotW: I am a firm believer of not showing when it comes to horror and this hit just the right spot.

Mat, you saint patron of thieves! Of course, he would recruit ruffians for scouts. He is so fond of his men too.

The Olver addition is so random. It could be either very endearing or very annoying, we'll see.

Kinda proves my point from last review that Lan's echoes in Rand's mind are mostly self-destructive intrusive thoughts like "I am death" and Moiraine's so far is politically savvy advice with occasional martyr complex.

Ajhdjfkjshfks, between Verin wondering if Rand killed Moiraine and the Red Tower not even believing in her death and suspecting the mysterious Green sister is Moiraine, she is haunting the narrative!

Shout-out to Moiraine and her secret forbidden weaves.

The Aiel cultural comedy of errors is starting to get old, as is the gag of Maidens acting like mother hens to Rand. We get it, women warriors mothering him is funny.

Wait, did Fain just imply Elaida and Pedron Niall are infected with Mashadar? CAN WE GET MORE ON THAT PLEASE

Siuan and Leane being healed! My heart! Their reaction was so moving and poor Nynaeve in the middle of it, healing the incurable almost by accident. What did I say about hapless PhD students? This makes up for my frustration with Nyn this book.

Carlinya laying down some truths about the Tower hypocrisy regarding the DR and male channelers! Hell yes! Rand is like you! Male channelers are like you! They need to be protected and accommodated, not gentled and executed.

Gareth is beyond gross. The way he relishes the power he has over Siuan, making her feel every inch of the power imbalance has me shivering.

I want to cry. Siuan, Leane, I love you. The concept of regaining their power, but only a fraction of it, leaving them scarred, is a fascinating one. Their delayed reaction to the trauma they went through was also everything.

Another takeaway from Alanna bonding Rand and Siuan loving Bryne is that after losing their warders Aes Sedai are a complete mess and prone to dreadful decision making.

Aran'gar is in Salidar! This is bad for all of them. Despite how risky keeping Moghedien hidden is, at least Nyn and Elayne have her completely subdued. This is a loose cannon.

RJ cannot ekphrasis for peanuts for someone so good at hypotyposis.

OH hell, Rand spied on them. Everyone forgot he is a boss at Tel'aran'rhiod.

Egwene's relationship with the Wise Ones is incredible. She truly became an Aiel at heart and grew so much. I love her so much.

Up until this point, Rand was politically astute, but between trusting Taim with training an army, ignoring the Sea Folk and kidnapping Elayne... This is chaotic ruling. Be careful, please.

Jordan's weird obsession with corporal punishment aside, Egwene meeting her toh was amazing. Also of course she would rediscover travelling through Tel’aran’rhiod on her own.

Ajjdkdkjfkskfjdh EGWENE YOU POOR CHILD YOU DON'T DESERVE THIS INTRIGUE

But she also deserves to be Amyrlin. She's the best.

The Amyrlin ceremony seems very terfy.

It's plain foolishness to think Elaida will retreat just because another Amyrlin has been raised. The Salidar lot is at their wits’ end.

I am so so so proud of Egwene and Siuan. So proud. Their sense of duty is everything and seeing Siuan becoming Egwene's mentor, while Egwene becomes Siuan's protector means everything to me.

The gag of Aviendha being swarmed by Aes Sedai after Egwene and the Wise Ones does make up for the endless Aiel humour skits.

As much as I am 100% on Elayne's side regarding Rand giving her Caemlyn and Cairhien (I feel bad for the Cairhienin. Again, they are given absolutely no self-determination here), I would really welcome the break from Elayne and Nynaeve on yet another Macguffin hunt.

Does Thom think he left Moiraine to die? Why? He’s not her warder and Lan doesn't even think he did?

Between Rand believing he knows what's going on with Elayne and Egwene in Salidar, Mat convinced Aviendha will kill Elayne, and the Wise Ones calling the Aes Sedai foolish women, let's just say it's a field day for unreliable narrators.

War bores me. The Black Tower as nothing but a military camp bores me.

The Salidar Aes Sedai are so entertaining, though. They’re very much an administration run amok.

Is Mat dancing with Aran'gar? Jabdjfkkahfjfkkd he is such a fool. I love him. I love the contrast between Moiraine and Rand clocking Forsaken like it's their job, and Mat, Nynaeve and Elayne doing everything short of kissing them.

Meanwhile, Mat flirting with Siuan and Leane flirting with him as revenge is exactly the kind of comedy of errors I enjoy.

I must say, Mat being a little sexist jerk was redeemed by him showing Egwene proper respect just to spite Aes Sedai. One thing I like about him is the way his first reaction is often off-putting, but he will course correct swiftly.

Rand complaining about Aes Sedai tying strings to him while doing exactly with all of his friends is most excellent.

Am I supposed to be glad Perrin and Faile reinvented feudalism in the Two Rivers?

The discussion with Davram and Perrin about women and truth manages to be even more ludicrous than the Two Rivers nonsense in book 4, which is an achievement.

On one hand, Rand is obviously not behind the Aes Sedai murder attempt and this is a trap; on the other, you can't tell me the Salidar embassy's initial reaction was excessive.

Because Aes Sedai and Rand are the same, of course they don't continue on the non-excessive path long.

Nyn and Elayne are super silly with Vandene and Adeleas. I don't care if they dislike being chaperoned. They can just pretend they will obey and do the contrary. It will at least ease the sisters' suspicion.

The sisters poking at Mat like he's a lab rat is a little bit funny.

Ten days it is? Okay, so the girls are going to fuck around for ages like in Tanchico.

I am glad that Min caught on what Rand has missed with the Salidar embassy. He is bungling his handling of the Aes Sedai, all the elements are in place for a catastrophic outcome. Not that I was expecting the Aes Sedai to be sensible here, but he is generally much better at diplomacy.

I retract what I said about Min, she did send Rand right into the Lion's den. Obviously, it would have been too simple if Bera and Kiruna had been planned. Coming to Cairhien without a stronger alliance with the Salidar lot, considering whatever the Tower's embassy has been plotting, is A Bad Idea.

I like Merana. I love these tidbits about the Tower ranking not being strictly power-based.

The waiting in Cairhien is just boring, there's no way around it, even with the terrifying warfare Berelain has unleashed on Perrin.

Poor Loial getting saddled with a romance does not make this better.

OH, I knew this. I bloody knew all his hopping from Caemlyn to Cairhien, his cautiousness with the Salidar embassy not equaling his with the White Tower's, his relying on Min for intel and not caring a jot what fighting Lews Therin was doing to his psyche would lead to the worst. So bloody good, but man, was it written on the wall. The tragedy, the horror, the beauty.

Mat playing with a Seanchan now; reader, I screamed internally. I wish the EF5 were half as suspicious of anyone as they are of Aes Sedai.

Mat making a terrible job of raising Olver while also caring about him is very in-character.

Errrr, the choice to have Ebou Dari and Domani people of colour and paint them as violent and hyper-sexual is certainly something.

OH, so Sevanna is the one who tricked the Aes Sedai in Caemlyn! SWEET. There are so many threads flying around.

OOOOOOOH, so tying a shield is easier than holding it. INTERESTING Also this comes just after Egwene complained about traditions of holding vs. tying.

Rand is going to be beyond traumatized by all this. The parallels with Egwene and the Seanchan are delicious though.

The thing is... Between the Shaido Wise Ones, the Seanchan and the Asha'man, the Aes Sedai' oath not to kill or make weapons with the One Power is actually a most excellent idea. For real, Rand opened a school not two months ago and they are already committing war crimes?

The battle for Rand is less confusing than some of the previous fights, but it is also less visually striking, for me at least. Emotionally, it is way more satisfying though.

My girl Egwene freeing Logain and taking counsel from Siuan... My heart is so full.

Myrelle talking about Lan like it's a case of futile medical care...

So Aes Sedai do feel quite strongly their warder's wounds? Honestly, between the stamina and strength, the extended years in good health, and accessible healing, the warders gain a lot from the bond.

The Sea folk ships HAVE to be full of Seanchan, they have to.

I have as much thoughts and questions about Rand making the Aes Sedai kneel than about Moiraine in TFoH, but I suspect all will be addressed in the next book so I am reserving my judgement.

Can I just say none of this book would have happened had Moiraine been there by Rand's side?

Overall, this one was a bit of a transitional book, wasn't it? Many chapters were mostly spent waiting for things to happen, in Caemlyn, in Cairhien, on the road, in Salidar, which brought back dark memories from TEotW. At this point, we are familiar enough with the characters not to mind just hanging out with them, but the contrast with the chapters where the story is advancing is too great for me to say it is worth it. The highs (Siuan and Leane healed, Egwene becoming Amyrlin, Rand captured, the Salidar plotting) were really high, and I really enjoyed the trap slowly closing on Rand and the way it culminated in pain, violence and rage in Dumai's wells. And even those highs are mainly setting things up and redefining arcs for the main characters, a given for the middle point. It did so unevenly, with Rand and Egwene at the top and Perrin and Aviendha at the bottom. But yeah, the book lived up to my expectations. NOW I need to know what is going on with the Sea Folk.

#The wheel of time #Wot book spoilers #Lord of chaos #Wot book review #Wot book journey #I cut many an irate note about the romances as always but left some because I needed to out myself as a Gawyn hater #Dumai's well was every bit as good as expected #Good job fandom

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strelles-universe · 2 years

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Cats of ThunderClan: Goldenflower

Name: Goldenflower

Meaning: Golden furred and Delicate

Identity: Cisgender Molly - She/Her

Orientation: Bisexual - Tom Leaning

Rank: Sitter

Former Rank(s): Hunter

Goldenflower is a mostly golden long furred cryptic tortie molly with yellow eyes and paler stripes. The molly is very loving and caring towards her kits- she’s also incredibly defensive of them. A sharp tongued and somewhat rude cat, Goldenflower was very respected by her fellow clanmates although she’s not very popular with cats who’ve previously been on the receiving end of her tongue. Although her name isn’t the most fitting, she’s pleased to be named after her late mother whom she misses dearly and wears the suffix -flower with pride.

Not many cats were surprised when Goldenflower announced that she would be staying in the nursery after Swiftpaw and Lynxpaw became apprentices. Everyone had seen the way she practically glowed when surrounded by kits and even before she'd switched, she'd long since begun learning about names and proper kit-care.

Goldenflower was practically glowing when Lynxcackle received her warrior name and she's willing to brag to anyone willing to listen about how amazing her kits are. She can't wait for Swiftpaw to earn his warrior name and hopes that it's as fitting and well-chosen as his sister's.

She was devastated by the revelation of Tigerclaw's treachery and her mind is swimming with confusion. Did Tigerclaw ever care about her? He spent moon after moon courting her and he'd seemed genuine - what about their kits? Did he even care about them or were they secondary to his plan for revenge too? Goldenflower is paranoid that ThunderClan will punish her kits for being Tigerclaw's - or worse, that Tigerclaw will come back and try to steal them from her.

Her approach to this is to shut down - she won't talk about Tigerclaw to almost anyone and has already decided not to tell her kits about their father. This strategy has resulted in some isolation and disapproval from her clanmates but Goldenflower just curls up tighter and tighter.

Goldenflower found kinship and warmth in the loner, Hound who brought in her daughter and a sad story. Even as Goldenflower struggled to reconnect with her clan, Hound was a stable and steadying presence in her life. The tipping point for their friendship was Hound stepping in when Goldenflower attempted to make Fireheart tell her kits the truth about their father - although she’d been hurt and blinded with pain at the time, she realized that Hound had been right about her internalizing her fear and passing it on to Fireheart.

Seeing Tigerstar trespassing so deep in ThunderClan territory so soon after telling her kits the truth about their sire sent waves of rage and fury boiling through her veins. She’s not sure what she was expecting but it wasn’t that Tigerstar would kill her. Still, she’s satisfied that he didn’t get away with it completely free - he was bleeding and stumbling off. She’s proud of herself when she finds out that she took a life from him and is grateful to Fireheart and Hound for stepping up and deciding to look out for her kits when they didn’t need to.

Mentor(s): Dappletail, Thrushpelt (temp)

Apprentice(s): Fernpaw (incomplete)

Parents: Dappleflower (mother/deceased), Silktail (father/deceased)

Sweetparent(s):

Auncle(s): N/A

Sibling(s): Lionheart (brother)

Nephling(s): Cinderpaw (niece), Thornrustle (nephew), Brackensight (nephew), Brightruin (niece)

Cousin(s): N/A

Mate(s): Tigerstar (former)

Crush(es): Hound (nursing)

Kit(s): Lynxcackle (daughter), Swifttalon (son, Bramblepaw (son), Tawnypaw (daughter)

#strelles goldenflower #picture to be added #strelles stormborn #strelles stormborn meadows #strelles stormborn guards #strelles stormborn sitters #strelles the greenwood empire

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yesterdaysyearning · 23 days

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shrimp ring

“girl help I’m romanticizing situations” – bluebandana

Picture this: I’m sitting on the bottom edge a bed that’s been pushed into a corner with pillows strewn all around the perimeter. A large dog is laying by my feet, looking anything but relaxed as he keeps a close eye on what she’s putting in her mouth. A defrosted shrimp ring – you know the kind that you get in the discount bin with itty bitty fish that curl up around a thin piece of black plastic? Devoured in five minutes flat by the cutest and most compact human I’ve ever had the pleasure of meeting. With every discarded tail and lick of a finger I grow more confused. Though words are said, nothing sticks because all I can think is… am I turned on right now?

A while back, when I was still blissfully married and cruising apps for a casual flame that may or may not confirm how painfully queer I was, I come across a smile to remember. We have a few casual exchanges that are mostly silly and forgettable. What do you like? Smiles and butts of course. An embarrassingly baby gay response apparently. Good thing she has both. Flirty banter? Check. But then she asks if I have Snapchat… and well, this is too far. I suddenly become acutely aware of our two-year age gap and that fact that this is a real person who I would have to interact outside of this illusionary realm if I did in fact, want to see her butt. Abort mission.

Fast forward to the first weekend of June 2023. I’ve been kindly adopted into a co-worker’s friend group to attend the first event of Pride: Lavender Wild Fest. It’s going to be gay as fuck and I am PUMPED (vibrating with anxiety and mildly nauseous from the espresso martini I had at brunch).

As we enter the venue half of my group diverts to grab a snack, and I casually peruse the scenery. A group of four catches my eye. One member is dressed in all black, wearing a weirdly large hat, and emanating an exuberant energy across the paved desert. I’m entranced by her smile and a nagging sense that I know her from somewhere...

I end up staring for a concerning amount of time – silently praying that her gaze shifts slightly to the left. If she would just look at me then I know we’d make swoon worthy, spark igniting, lesbian-longing eye contact and fall in love forever. Shockingly, this does not happen. Probably something to do with my blasphemous nature. Her group makes their way back towards to beer tents and vanish into thin air.

~~~

Two weeks later I’m at the same venue to relive my angsty youth while watching Alexisonfire and I see her again in the crowd. Same outfit, same hat, and same lack of eye contact. I find out later that she wasn’t actually there, which means that either she has a doppelgänger, or that my manifestations had taken an abrupt turn to the delusion highway. But that’s neither here nor there.

I contemplate the existence of a higher power when I open the app the next day and there is her face beaming back at me. The memory of our previously failed match comes flooding back to me. I send a like. She responds quickly with some line about singing acapella and teaching her to dance. She proposes Cotton Eye-Joe in a park. I cringe, immediately questioning our future. I counter with Gloria at a bar. We get down to the nitty gritty.

What would you describe your vibe as? A black cat who talks a lot (me). A golden retriever with the anxiety levels of a chihuahua (her). A sapphic pairing that would make the heavens weep.

What’s your star sign? An apprehensive Gemini. An excited Leo. This could be a problem. She quickly redeems herself by suggesting I add her on Co-Star. I’m basically foaming at the mouth.

Our compatibility is strong for basic personalities and horrible for Communication & Love. We will never have a happily ever after. But Sex & Aggression are a match so we agree we will be best friends with benefits.

I can’t help bringing up the fact that I spotted her at Lavender fest which brings our conversation back round to the topic of music tastes. She drops the bomb that she is seriously inclined to country. A fact that would normally be a do not pass go; but she’s charming, so we exchange socials and send each other screenshots of our top Spotify songs. Hers is mostly composed of insipid EDM but there’s one song that is fire for my soul. We’re back in business.

I wake to a voice note (sent at the ungodly hour of 7am) asking if I want to buy tarot cards and learn to read them in a park today. I, a human of reasonable and rational weekend habits, listen to this at 11am. I say yes but she’s had four hours of boredom and made other plans. It is agreed that we will make this happen soon. The timing doesn’t matter though – an impulsive date that merges two of my favourite things? I am hooked.

Later that day and as I sit in Gladday with my friend watching the Queer Ultimatum, my heart races along with my phone as it vibrates with incoming messages from her. We go for a walk after the show, and I gush about this new crush that is the total opposite of me. She likes camping and country music can you believe it? But her energy is so contagious and carefree. I find myself thrilled by the prospect of finding someone who I can’t see a long-term future with, but who could be the perfect summer fling.

~~~

We start almost exclusively communicating via voice notes; migrating from the dating app to Instagram where she also sends me some thirsty videos of her working with a nail gun. Did I mention she’s a carpenter? Fuck me, right. She offers to switch back to texting at one point and I jokingly tell her we can’t because I’m addicted to her voice. Of course, I’m actually dead serious.

The way she sounds is intoxicating. She has a slight lisp and absent mindedly floats between a twangy and valley girl accent. It’s toe curling, face scrunching, tiny squealing adorable. This kind of infatuation feels foreign; its vastly different from the kind of lust I normally experience with crushes. Her charism invokes the same irrational desire in me to crush a puppy’s head or bite a baby’s foot. I want to eat her up and taste the sickening sweetness.

My favourite phrases of hers:

no, so, also (all pronounced with half an o and r thrown in)

anywhoozer

buchhyeaa

gooooode

mmmhuu (when pleased or frustrated)

ottayy

girly

do be

oh my doord

jaah know

good mrrning

We plan to meet the Thursday after pride but are doubtful that we’ll be able to keep the voice notes up for that long. How silly we were. The next five days are a blur of continuous conversation about anything and everything. Monday night we stay up late messaging and she’s grumpy the next morning. I quickly learn that she has a strict bedtime that she must adhere to, or else she turns into a gremlin (a nickname I crown her with).

I post a story that quotes the epigraph, and we discuss how we’re both prone to romanticizing situations. We talk about where we grew up and how kismet it is that we’re both from Hamilton and now live in the city. She tries to convince me that camping can be fun and starts planning out a million cute dates for us. Barbequing on the beach, sleeping in a hammock, hustling people at a pool hall.

What’s your type? A masc presenting person who is kind and funny but also looks like they could ruin my life. Hers? Patient, intelligent, good conversationalist, confident and sure of themselves, nice face and eyes, dark features, gives her attention, and could kick her ass. A femme tomboy mix that will do wild/crazy shit but doesn’t bro out like her friends. I realize I don’t exactly fit the mold. I persist, nonetheless.

Eventually we find that sending five voice notes in a row back and forth has muddled the conversation and we have too many strains to keep up with. Tuesday night I listen to her latest batch of messages, take notes, and create a six-minute monologue to answer everything at once and tie up loose ends. I win brownie points for being studious and patient enough to deliver such an absurdly long note.

My brain is feeling mushy Wednesday so I convince her that it would just be easier to have a phone call. It’s obvious that we’re both nervous but an ease quickly washes over us and soon we’re giggling and chatting shit like a couple of schoolgirls. It pains me that I can’t recall 95% of that conversation – fog from the euphoria, I’m sure. I do remember briefly convincing her that my middle name was Presley (hers is Lisa Marie, obviously). We end up talking for two hours – a feat that she is incredibly impressed with.

That night I have one of my vivid and visceral nightmares. My work crush shows up at my house where my mom is drunk and unhinged. There is white goo all over the floor, my cat is injured, and I have holes in my hands that won’t stop bleeding. I wake myself up at 4:44am and can’t get back to sleep. I text her to tell her that she’s cursed me.

We’re both sluggish; I kept her up way past her bedtime and I’m in a boring conference for work. She asks for a photo of my cubicle, and I include a corporate goth bathroom photo. I’m nervous about her reaction because she hasn’t seen a full-length photo before, but she says I look good with a heart eye emoji, and I am reassured. I tell my friend at lunch about our late-night chat, and she proposes we start making me badges for when I reach new levels of gay.

I leave work early for a virtual therapy appointment. I haven’t had a session since early April so there’s a lot of ground to cover. I cry a lot and try to explain the daily panic of waking up and not recognizing myself or my new life. Despite the monumental changes, my therapist thinks I’m doing well and comments on the fact that I seem more self-assured.

I mention this long and emotional day only to illustrate how stupid what I do next is.

~~~

Bolstered and renewed by my hour of introspection, I excitedly send a voice note asking about her day. Turns out she picked up a shrimp ring at the grocery store and is devastated to find out that it didn’t come with any dip… A few fumbling and awkward messages later, she gives me her address so I can be a sauce hero.

I’m glad you’re not tall, I didn’t think to ask.

Ten dizzying minutes searching for shrimp dip in the grocery store and a torturous twenty five-minute Uber ride later – this is the first thing she says to me. We’re strolling around the block to calm her stranger-hesitant dog and I have no response. I had been overthinking the height difference for a couple days and dug out my old beat-up Docs instead of wearing my usual platform boots that would have put me four inches above her. I think I eventually comment on the heat, but truthfully, I can only watch from above as my anxiety skyrockets me into peak numbing dissociation.

Eventually we head up the stairs into the apartment. The dog does not bark or seem bothered by my intrusion. Sigh of relief. A ta-da moment as I hand her the sauce and chocolate covered raisins. She says something about a kilt cozy and asks me to call the odds that she could throw a raisin in my mouth… every brain cell of mine has been zapped and I cannot comprehend what she’s asking.

Once she catches on that I’m a fucking idiot, we go to the kitchen to retrieve the precious shrimp. And water, so I have something to hold. Should we watch a movie? NO, I blurt out. Um, not yet. I am scrambling to recalibrate and in hindsight, a movie might have been the right choice. Instead, I end up on the end of her bed watching her devour the crustaceans.

As she eats and talks – I try to breathe and do the work of merging the picture of her that had been in my head with the reality in front of me. I had seen her in person before of course, but matching her voice and mannerisms to her body is disorienting. In person her energy is even more child-like and I can’t help but feeling like I’m in the room of a teenage-boy. She’s wearing gym-shorts (we all know how I feel about those) and a red long-sleeve shirt that is pulled up to reveal forearms covered in remnants of past pain. Her baseball hat and calloused hands that she welds around animatedly reminds me of my cousin; a realization that disturbs me and I quickly push aside.

She tries to give the dog a shrimp and he spits it back out looking disappointed and confused. I get it buddy. I’m finally coherent enough by the time the shrimp is gone to talk about dreams. She tells me about a horrifying paralysis dream that involves her dad (so much to unpack) and a reoccurring dream about zombies where she’s the hero who saves everyone. I joke that I would just give up in a zombie apocalypse because I don’t have that strong of a will to live. She does not laugh. Fuck. Okay, so dark humour is off the table. She mercifully suggests going for a cigarette.

Sitting on the metal stairs that lead to her apartment, I retell my horrific tale of being dragged down the same kind of steps by an excited puppy as a kid. She’s sitting two steps below me and looks up mischievously as she challenges me to come up with a story that involves a shovel. A peculiar version of eye-spy. I dazzle her with a story about a sketchy Hamiltonian shoveler. She laughs and I can’t help but notice how beautiful her amber eyes are.

With the awkwardness and anxiety substantially subdued, we head back inside to do an oracle reading with the deck I brought. She earnestly listens to me explain a basic Past, Present, Future layout and the meaning of the cards. She insists I pull cards as well and we end up with two of the same cards (Ram & Beaver). I can tell she’s hesitant to read out loud, but it comes off endearing – pausing, one eyebrow arched, to hear my answers to the questions that the guidebook asks.

She removes her hat and curls up with a pillow. I move onto my stomach so I can be closer to her. She starts and wins a thumb war. The dog gets jealous by the contact so I’m forced to suppress the urge to demand a rematch so that I can keep holding her hand. Instead, I charm the dog into a long snuggle hug. His affection towards me surprises her – it’s because I’m such an amazing person. We keep talking and play a quick game to determine her true type: someone who’s soft, loyal, and loves unconditionally.

At some point, I realize there’s something about her that feels incredibly safe. I’m not at all sure what this means, and I can’t seem to sus out whether we’re flirting or not but some point I admit to zoning out during one of her stories because I can’t get over how cute she is and she blushes.

She gets up to show me her hat collection and puts on her favourite cowboy fare – grinning wildly with a mixture of embarrassment and bravado. I find myself imagining moving to the edge of the bed to pull her close. I take this as an indication of real attraction; knowing that I have to leave soon, I put on my bravery vest and ask if I can kiss her. I don’t think we should. About a million different emotions pass through me and I pray that my face betrays none of them. She says she’s getting over a cold, but I delicately push and ask if there’s any other reason. She admits she’s just not sure if there’s a vibe yet.

We head out to smoke before I head home. She asks if I feel super awkward now. No, I’m fine just worried that I made you uncomfortable. Which is true. I feel strangely calm but concerned that I upset her. She shares that she recently went out with a girl who was super forward. She went along with it and ended up feeling bad about it, so she doesn’t want to do that again. I admit that I’m not sure there’s anything between us either, but there’s like not not a vibe? For me, it’s easier to tell if there’s something romantic based on how a kiss feels; but I totally understand if that’s not how she wants to do things. My hope is that by explaining my thought process, I’ll provide reassurance and remove any pressure. I don’t think I achieve this though as I dumbly add that she has very nice eyes. She tells me I have a nice smile and insists on driving me home.

We get into Betty (her small white car) and I try not to notice how good she looks while driving. The radio plays Use Somebody and we sing along quietly. She switches stations and I egg her on to twangyily sing Dust on the Bottle with me. She mentions wanting to buy a truck and says that she’s the straightest gay girl I’ll ever meet. I concede that that’s probably true. I feel the tension ease a bit and an emboldened me plugs in my phone to show her my Pride song One Big Gay Disco. I let myself get a little lost in the music. Are those finger guns? She hates the song, but I have her laughing at my goofy car seat dance. At this point I’m confident I’ve redeemed myself and optimistic that we just need more time to get to know each other.

When she gets out of the car to hug me, she remarks that she likes that I give full hugs and not weird half side hugs. I go in for another hug and squeezed her tight. She hugs me back, but I can feel her whole body stiffen. Something isn’t right. I stand outside smoking and call my best friend to help decipher all ways in which I just fucked up. She tries to reassure me that I didn’t do anything wrong, but I still felt unsettled.

Before I go to bed, I send a voice note thanking her for the car ride and for communicating openly. I say I’m happy I came over and wish her a goodnight. She responds saying she’s happy we have the meeting behind us and apologizes for being awkward. To clarify, she only wants to be friends.

Not to add a dog to the mix but he would be really sad if we weren’t friends. Because although I hate to admit it, he really loves you.

I feel the air ripped from my lungs. Rejection, confusion, and frustration creating a storm in my body as I scream into my pillow. I eventually answer back to say we can be friends for the dog’s sake. Six days to build a fantasy and fifty-three seconds to knock it to the ground.

~~~

In the morning I send her a melancholic voice note. It feels like when you study really hard for an exam, but you fail because you read the question wrong. She likes my analogy.

We send a few more messages throughout the day – it feels somewhat normal, but we agree we should just reconvene after the weekend. It is my first Pride in the city after all. I spend the morning failing to focus on work and crying in various spurts. I begin to spiral because this feels so familiar. I fall back into thinking about the last failed connection and how I must be doing something wrong. Questions keep rolling around in my brain. Do I make people uncomfortable? Am I unattractive? Do I reek of desperation? Can they see all my broken parts? Am I bad at being gay?

I rally in the afternoon to host a friend and head out to the Village to check out the vendors and crowds. While there are moments of delight (when a gay man stops to compliment my eyebrows), I largely feel dejected and self-conscious about everything I say and do. I move through the crowds like an apologetic ghost. My friend heads home early and as I walk back to my apartment, I desperately try to find the joy that I should feel being surrounded by all these beautifully free people. I fall asleep at the end of my bed, slightly tipsy, and hopeful for tomorrow.

The next morning another friend and her sister bring their dogs and me to Puppy Pride. We sit in the sun cooing at all the cute rainbow adorned dogs and chat about all my big dumb feelings. They assure me that it’s not as dire as my intrusive thoughts have made it and we laugh about the absurdity of the first date, deciding to refer to it as Shrimpgate from now on. The heat is suffocating as we walk down Church in search of food, and against all odds we walk right past the gremlin and her group of friends. Of all the streets in all the cities… or whatever. All progress falls away immediately, and I slink home to have a nap and cry about it.

By the evening I have hyped myself back up, redone my make-up, and found an outfit I feel hot in, so I venture back out to the Village to dance the night away. Bolstered by my fun evening, I join friends for the parade on Sunday. We sip on slushies trying to ignore the oppressive sun; and it works for a while. My heart swells watching all the love on the street but they’re tired and I’m fragile, so we call it an evening after one patio drink. My first Pride in the city, and all I can think as the sun sets is whether I will hear from her tomorrow.

Monday comes and we start swapping Pride stories early in the morning. Her weekend involved a lot more kissing and partying than mine did. She says that she still wants to do a tarot date and I tell her that I’m down to try but add a caveat that the situation kind of fucked me up for a few days so I’m not sure how well it will go. I was clearly doing such a great job of playing it cool. Maybe hanging out will be a defining moment.

She’s feeling quite rough post-pride but we keep chatting over the next few days about random things. I end up making her a playlist (like the gay asshole I am) and I propose a movie date with a side of platonic cuddling (like the gay asshole I am). She wants to see my apartment and meet my cat so we decide she should come over at the end of the week and watch a horror movie. Despite being excited for this plan, I move through the week with a generally low mood and despondent attitude. Like the sad cartoon character with a storm cloud following. I have a nice visit with a friend on Thursday, but something feels very off in my body.

Friday comes around and I spend the day actively squashing any expectations or fantasies I have about the evening while I clean. Mid-way through the day she lets me know that she’s had some work shit come up and she’s too tired and scattered to socialize. Rain check? I send a voice note and she hears disappointment in my voice. I send another one to reassure her that it’s fine to reschedule, and respect that she needs time and space to deal with things.

I remember the frantic feeling I had when recording it. Trying to hide my own emotion and come off as an understanding and reasonable person. I find often when I talk, I get distracted by my swelling emotions and become anxious that I’m making no sense or sounding crazy. For as long as I can remember, I’ve also hated listening to myself in recordings or on video – cringing at the strange pitch and childish lilt. Much like seeing a photo of myself, hearing myself speak can trigger a dissociative episode where I question the reality of me in the world. But I listen back to this voice note, worried I said the wrong thing, and am surprised to find that I sound calm, articulate, and possibly even wise. I also sound kind of alluring?

Since then, I’ve listened back to other voice notes. Some of hers because her voice still gives me a boost of dopamine. Also, some of mine and for once, I look in from the outside and like what I see. This is perhaps the greatest gift she gave me.

She suggests rescheduling for Sunday and insinuates that there were other things making her tired earlier in the week. I decipher that she means she was on a date and reassure her that she doesn’t have to hide anything from me. While 90% true (I’m so chill) I am very taken back when she sends me voice notes describing three days of confusing passion. There is a woman who she mentioned before (not true unless it’s the girl that was too forward?) that she went on a few dates with, but friend zoned because she gave her too much attention. They ended up hanging out on Monday and curiosity killed her. She then spent the next two nights in her bed, up until at least 2am. She politely avoids saying they had wild sex all night, but I get the point.

I’m vibrating with rage by the time I finished the voice notes. Sure, there’s a bit of jealousy – why couldn’t I pique her curiosity? But I truly cannot believe that she would be so insensitive and give this kind of detail. It’s one thing to say oh hey I went on a date, and I’m tried but it felt like she was rubbing it in my face. At the very least, she’s not conscious enough to see the similarities between our situations and see that the specifics might be hurtful for me to hear. My confusion and anger are only heightened when I realize that she had been sending me voice notes on the nights and mornings that she would have been with the other woman. I don’t know what is going to happen the next day, but my armour is now solidly in place.

I spend the morning much like Friday. I get groceries, clean the apartment, and try to stay calm and collected. She’s impatient and asks if she can come earlier than planned. Sure, let’s get this over with. I am going to exude ice queen energy. And I do. For like thirty seconds.

I meet her outside with an umbrella, pay for her parking, and then we sit on the steps to have a smoke. I can feel her anxiety. Or is it mine? She sits below me again, which annoys me as she looks up bright eyed and smiling. I ask her how her stressful work stuff is going and struggle to hold onto the conversation as I’m focused on settling my pulse. We head inside and I feel extra prickly as she makes a throw away comment about the weird hallway floors.

I should also mention that it’s hot. She had picked today because it was supposed to thunderstorm which would be the perfect movie watching weather; but its only lightly raining and the AC-less air in my apartment is thick and humid. My cat is hidden on the bookcase and scares her when she says hello. I get us water and she says something about the kitchen being tucked away strangely. Looking back, I can see that she was just nervous but I was looking through green coloured glasses, and bristle at almost every word. I can feel myself being bitchy and not being able to stop it. This is my space, and I like it! And I’m worthy of adoration too! my inner dialogue whines.

I get us a snack and we settle onto the couch to play with the oracle cards at her request. She pulls one about being a mentor or being mentored – very apt given her stressful work situation. I pull one about getting over trauma – very apt given my entire life situation. I give her treats to give to the cat, who screams like a banshee, and breaks the tension.

I ask her to tell me the night shift story that she teased a while back and this accidently opens up the door to some real trauma. She talks about her struggle with substances during a dark period in her life and retells all the places and people she lived with. She says something about being a bad person back then, and I interject to tell her she’s not a bad person she just didn’t make great choices. She jokes about this being a therapy session. I willfully ignore this comment but later roll it around in my brain wondering if I was enacting an old role.

There is something about the way she tells these stories that illuminates a soft yet guarded vulnerability. It makes my heart ache. I sense these are things she keeps stored away for herself. Things that she could steal glances at as reminders of past mistakes and pain that she thought she deserved. Like an old scab you pick to distract yourself. I have a fierce desire to protect her. To make her feel better. She seems to squirm under observation, and this sudden switch from being angry and shielded to being tender and protective felt uncomfortable, so we move on.

Fearing the dreaded looks of pity, I quickly recount all the places I’ve lived and with whom – this includes a windowless hell in St. Catherines and stories about both my grandparents’ deaths. I honestly couldn’t say how she reacted to my trauma timeline; one of those fun dissociation tricks again. But I am exceedingly thankful when she suggests we go for a cigarette.

Outside she’s vibrating with anxious energy, so we walk down the block as we smoke. A change of scenery is good, and we start discussing a plan to find my best friend a new partner when she comes to visit. I mention that she’ll needs financial stability because she is a Taurus – she mentions the girl she’s been spending time with is also a Taurus. Fantastic. She wants to keep walking, but I turn us around because I can feel my nerves fraying; we need to start this movie, so I don’t have to think of more things to say.

I had researched and picked X beforehand because it seemed like a type of horror I could handle. Plus, it’s set in the 70s and Jenna Ortegga is in it. She loves this fact and I tease her that she has a crush on a child. She jumps onto the bed first so she’s by the window. I set up fans, get us more water, grab the snacks, and place the laptop between us. We both start to relax. She notes that the bed is very comfortable and when I ask if her anxiety is any better. Yes, laying down helps. There’s a horribly graphic and bloody scene at the beginning of the movie that has us both yelling and laughing. She’s slightly higher than me, so I have to keep turning to look up at her. Was she always this hot? There’s something mischievous in her eyes and my stomach does that twisty thing. What the fuck.

She suddenly sits up and pauses the movie. She has to pee. When she’s done, I go as well so that I can take a moment to reenter my body through the mirror. When I come back, I stop her from starting the movie to ask how she’s feeling about platonic cuddling. What spoon do you want to be? I say I don’t care – ok she’ll be the little spoon. She takes off her hat and turns to nuzzle her body up to mine. What the fuck am I doing.

Laptop now moved to the window ledge, we are curled tightly together – like two shrimps in a ring, if you will. With my head propped on a pillow my right-hand plays with her hair and my left arm wraps casually around her torso. She’s so compact, I want to squeeze so tightly, but I refrain. This is platonic cuddling. I repeat to myself as I run my thumb up around her ear. I make comments about the thickness of her hair and stare at the strands intently, pretending it’s the most fascinating thing I’ve ever seen. My mind is goo at this point as I struggle to mitigate the duality of keeping this friendly while desire brews beneath my skin.

I ask her about the gauges in ears and when Fleetwood Mac starts playing in the film, I start singing softly. That’s right, I START SINGING. I know this sounds ridiculous; like I’m a lovesick puppy begging for affection, but I want to assure you (and myself) that this was not all one-sided. For while I’m struggling to keep things light and fun, she keeps pushing her body into mine. She laughs and burrows closer every time she turns to talk to me. On multiple occasions I ask her if she wants me to stop touching her hair or stop cuddling. She says no to both.

There are some sex scenes in the film, but we do an okay job of diffusing the awkwardness with jokes. At some point she says something mean or funny and I pull her hair hard. It feels so good and so terrible at the same time. While on some level I am immensely enjoying the cuddle (I was desperate for human contact and her body fits so well with mine), I am also having a hard time staying present. My body reacts to every breathe and movement as my mind flits through a million questions. Does she like this? Should I touch her there or here? Be firmer? Gentler? Back away? Get closer?

The movie ends in what feels like twenty seconds. What happened you ask? No idea. Lots of death… it was weird but ultimately forgettable. She jumps up and sits on her knees at the end of my bed complaining about it being super hot. The parking app notifies us that she has to move her car or leave. She should leave because she has to feed her dog soon anyways. I sit up and am distracted by another sneaky tattoo on her arm that I didn’t see before. I ask if I can see it and she adamantly refuses. To my own horror, I pout.

She stands and paces for a minute thanking me for playing with her hair. You’re really good at it. She walks over and hugs me as I’m sitting on the edge of the bed. It feels more intimate than it should, and I’m clouded by the desperate feeling of not wanting her to leave. I tell her I’ll walk her out and as I’m scrambling to find my keys I ask her if she thinks this was a defining moment as she predicted? I’ve gone over this moment numerous times and cannot clearly pinpoint what her answer was. I want to go back in time and shake myself to pay attention! Stop missing the important parts.

It's pouring when we get outside so we stand under my neighbour’s tree to have a smoke. My hands are shaking. I want to say I am acutely aware of the empty space that your body was just occupying and there’s a pit in my stomach because I have a terrible feeling that I’ll never get to touch you again. What I actually say is: I need to eat something.

There’s some light banter as we talk about superpowers. I know I’m looking at her too intently, but it feels like a memory I should hold onto. The picture of her smiling and smoking in the rain is something that needs to be captured. Serenity washes over me as I become certain that this is going to be the end. The yearning and pining after someone who isn’t available is a story I know too well. She senses this too, I think because as she leaves, she asks if it was a definable moment for me. I take a drag of my cigarette and quietly answer, yeah I think so. She doesn’t ask what I mean, just hugs me, and gets in her car. I stand on the sidewalk feeling like another piece has been chipped off. I feel like screaming and crying and I feel nothing at all.

~~~

I go back inside, lay down, and call my best friend. She’s mad because we cuddled, and it made me sad but understands it was something I needed to try. I tell her that I won’t fall into my old pattern again.

We hang up and I see that in the meantime she’s texted me. Are we gucci? with a nervous emoji. I ask if she has a few minutes to talk. She doesn’t want to phone, just text. I tell her that’s fine we can talk later then. My phone starts ringing. Why did you ask if we’re okay? She felt weird after she asked that question. I’m too attracted to you to be your friend. She got that impression but takes that as a compliment. The call is a bit of a blur again as emotions are high. She says something about it being weird because she’s into someone else.

I could still be your wing woman, said hopefully.

No, I can’t do that.

Well, you’re very good at playing with hair so you can always use that as a move.

Clearly not, I laugh.

I’m glad I got to meet your cat.

Yeah, you got all the good parts. Admittedly cruel and unnecessary, but in that moment, I feel too exposed and need her to hurt a bit.

She says I have her number if something changes. It was nice getting to know you.

~~~

I wake up super sick in the middle of an extreme heat wave. I spend the next 48 hours in bed, sweating, crying, and dreaming crazy shit. Oh, and analyzing every single fucking thing that has happened over the last two years. I’m very unwell for those few days – physically and mentally as a particularly terrible phone call from my ex-husband spins me into a dark oblivion.

By the time I’m well enough to get out of bed and shower I’ve decided that this time was going to be different. I could be strong enough to see past the useless infatuation and gain a friend. We weren’t compatible anyways. The longing was some misplaced lust for an attractive person who didn’t want me – my ultimate kryptonite. I didn’t really like her more than a friend, right?

We had sent a few texts about me being sick and she was still being very kind. I had also started the second season of The Bear and was starting to believe in the goodness of the world again; these two facts bolster me as I fervently draft a rambly message. I’d like to reevaluate being friends because I’m confident I could get over the crush if she was willing to be a bit patient with me. Plus, I added keenly, Hamiltonians should stick together. Eye rolls all around.

Hey, it was nice hanging out with you. But I don’t think we should be friends. I wish you all the best though!

Shocked? By the tone, yes. By the response? Not really. My entire body gets hot, and I feel lightheaded. But then…. relief. Her change of heart is a release from spending days, weeks, and possibly months trying to come up with excuses to interact and subtle ways to test whether she actually liked me. And the finality has saved me from trying to convince her I was someone worth having in her life. Now I don’t have to spend any time wondering whether she ever thinks about me, or if she ever starts to miss me. She doesn’t and she won’t. This was a mere blip in both of our chaotic dating adventures; a funny story to tell at dinner to illustrate the importance of strangers that pass through our lives. For a while though, I will watch her watching my stories and take solace in the fact that I briefly held the attention of a lion.

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danpuff-ao3 · 2 years

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I clearly have no life because I am almost done with your WTP recs, and am back to beg for more non-AO3 fic! 😊

Oh goodness, Anon, look at you go! Let me dig around and see what I can get for you.

Some notes: Firstly, with my last list I didn't include fics I'd put on other lists. However, some of these fics are too good to not mention again, so I'll be updating my WTP list with other previously mentioned faves. Mostly for the sake of people looking at one list but not the others. A gal can never mention her faves too many times, can she?? (I sure hope not, I never shut up.)

Secondly, not all of the fics I recommend are complete and those incomplete ones are...probably not going to be finished. I'll mark those as "IC" for incomplete. I'm mentioning them because I still think they're worth reading, but obviously that's up for you to decide!

Thirdly, I'll be tacking on where the fics are hosted after the author's name. "Other" means it's not a common website so just expect weirdness from those!

Lastly, mind the warnings on everything!

Snarry Fics, Non-AO3, Non-WTP:

A Bittersweet Potion series (E, long, IC) by Alchemia Dent & Bugland (other)

From Fanlore: During his 5th year, Harry Potter acquires the ability to shape-shift into anything he wishes. While in the form of a cat, he is adopted by Severus Snape, who believes he is a stray.

The Fourth Year (M, 42k) by Caligryphy (ffn)

SnapeHarry, HBP compliant. Snape is Harry's prisoner. An unforeseen event changes their relationship. Or has it already been changing?

So Lonely Without Me (M, 41k) by Caligryphy (ffn)

SnapeHarry slash. Two men, two rooms, a war.

Light on the Dark Side of Me (M, 114k) / In Memory's Wake (M, 89k, IC) by cocoa-snape (ffn)

Harry comes into his sexuality & discovers he wants Snape. Intense occlumency lessons pull these 2 together, but is Snape too troubled or too dark to return HP's affections? DE meetings & Dumbledore stir the already boiling pot,

Through hardship, Snape and Harry have found each other. But as Snape’s demons reemerge, can their relationship survive? And when the unthinkable happens, Harry begins to wonder whether Snape wants to forget or needs to. HPSS Slash, Sequel to LotDSoM

Coils of Gold (E, longish) by Crymsyn (other)

The death of one Dark Lord brings about the rise of another. AU.

Anesthesia (E, 6k) by florahart (LJ)

The basic idea here came from the blurb on the back of a Harlequin "Blaze" book called Sex Quotient. I'm pretty sure I changed the premise as I went, or at least, most of it, but the credit still goes there for the seed

Yearning by geneticallydead (LJ)

Harry buries Snape at Godric's Hollow. As he was in life, so he would be in death. Alone. But not forgotten.

The Marriage Stone (M, 382k, IC) by Josephine Darcy (ffn)

SSHP. To avoid the machinations of the Ministry, Harry must marry a reluctant Severus Snape. But marriage to Snape is only the beginning of Harry's problems. Voldemort has returned, and before too long Harry's marriage may determine the world's fate.

Starched Cuffs (E, 45k) by made.of.bees (ffn)

Draco trips Ron, who trips Harry, who is knocked into Snape and accidentally brushes his cuffs. Such a little thing, yet it's all he can think about. Everything he's been holding back since the Final Battle comes bursting forth, and Harry is determined to get Snape to stop ignoring him and actually talk. Unexpected allies, botched potions, detention, and Legilimency afoot! SSHP

Unexpected Effects (E, 160k) by made.of.bees (ffn)

Two years after being impaled by the Basilisk in the Chamber of Secrets, Harry starts noticing some...odd changes. During eighth year he can no longer pretend, and has to deal with what he's become. In order to do that, he has to get help from someone less-than-ideal. Over the years, Harry and Snape's relationship grows; now with an alternative Snarry ending. Rating to be safe.

Say It Properly (E, 4k) by Majenta (LJ)

His name finally cleared, Snape returns to Spinner's End following the aftermath of the war. An unexpected visit leads him to believe that his life may not be quite as empty as he had thought.

A Choriambic Progression (E, 90k) by Mariead Triste & Aristide

Snape is under a curse, is forced to spend time with Harry in the summer after OoTP.

Angelsey (E, 21k) by Raewhit (DW)

Severus had refused to go on holiday with Harry a year ago, and now has to wonder if he might have chosen differently, had he known it was the last he would see of Harry.

The Pain of a Promise (M, 6k) by Sansa (other)

Harry's keeping a terrible secret, and it's up to Severus to save him. Can their budding relationship withstand the fallout? Warning: Under 18. Implied Non-Con

Splinter (E, 11k) by Sansa (other)

Harry's still determined to save the world. Snape's determined to accept it as it is.

No Child at 17 (M, 500) by Spirit (ffn)

DRABBLE! I want him backed against my office wall with... the only thing anchoring him to reality is me... Merlin help me, I want him to think of me and only me. SSHP.

Nights of Gethsemane (E, 363k), Invictus (E, 300k+), Release of Sisyphus (E, ???, IC) by starcrossed (first on AO3, sequels on LJ)

Harry is a prisoner of the Dark Lord and Snape, his prison guard. Completely cut off from the outside world, Harry struggles to hold himself intact as he is forced to rely on Snape for everything. Yet Snape may not be all that he appears....

Tea series (E, long) by Telanu (Google docs, DM for link)

From Fanlore: The one in which Dumbledore has Snape in for a little chat, Harry and Snape are acting awfully strange around each other and Harry has a vision that indicates Snape may be in mortal danger. What will happen when Harry goes on his summer vacation? Will he save the Wizarding world, or will someone have to save him?

Shame the Devil (T, shortish) by Witling (LJ)

Written for someone who requested Snape/Harry, the use of Veritaserum, and "inappropriate revelations and ensuing action." Worksafe, childproof (mostly), safe for all ages and temperaments. May be mixed with crumbled arrowroot biscuit to tempt a ticklish palate.

Happy reading!!

#danpuff recs #anon asks #rec list #snarry #snarry recs #snarry fics #non ao3 non wtp list

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fauzhee10069 · 2 years

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JJBA part 4: The Sad Case of Kawajiri Family

You still had a chance to fix it, but would you?

Previously I had briefly talked about 'romance' in JoJo, despite romance is not being a strong point there, this manga is realistic enough to show things that could happen in romance, including ‘relationship fail’. There are quite a few examples but the most interesting for me is the case with Kawajiri family.

To protect his identity, our main villain Kira Yoshikage was forced to disguise himself and steal the identity of Kawajiri Kosaku, a salaryman who already married and had his own family.

Eventually, Kira inevitably had to live at Kosaku's house and take his role, but when he arrived at his new home, what he discovered was this:

DIU chapter 104: Atom Heart Father - part 5

Instead of a warm and loving family, he ended up with a broken one.

Now, I will mostly use Shinobu (the wife)’s point-of-view for my analysis. Why? Because I think her POV is the most genuine, rather than using Kira's POV (fake!Kosaku) or Hayato's POV (the kid who finally uncovered Kira's masquerade). Let’s begin…

Seeing her husband come home, Shinobu did not even care anymore. She thought that her husband was a boring man, living like a zombie or a programmed robot, “work” “food” “bath” “sleep” “work”, dull and monotonous. The wife has lost her passion-NO, both of them have lost their passion.

Shinobu was so tired of her husband's monotony that she was too lazy to even cook him a dinner. Actually this is also her code to say that "I'm sick and tired being with you". But surprisingly, her husband cooked his own dinner, and even cook for her too. Shinobu noted that she had never seen her husband cook and even doubted that he could.

Yeah, Kira Yoshikage is the best waifu amongst JoJo villains

Now, a little backstory of how Shinobu ended up with a guy like Kosaku, from how she was attracted to him to how she eventually fell out love.

DIU chapter 105: Kira Yoshikage's New Life - part 1

So actually, when Shinobu was dating Kosaku back in school days, it was not purely out of love, but rather to look cool in front of her friends… until she finally conceived Hayato and was 'made' to marry Kosaku which was more or less to cover their disgrace, in other words: married-by-accident.

So I think, their marriage was never really based on love. From the beginning they were forced to live together and raise a family.

Actually I think, Shinobu was still hoping that her married life can work, that over time, they could truly love each other and raise a normal loving family. Besides that, it did not mean that she was not grateful that her husband was a decent man, quite responsible and take good care of his family.

It's just that all those time, there has been absolutely no 'passion' in their lives. Living with compulsion, that was what they have lived. “Well, let’s make this work, I’ll be a good father so, be a good mom!” probably something like that could be what was in Kosaku's mind.

Being a cat lover she is, Shinobu confronted her husband who accidentally locked their pet cat outside. But Kosaku’s reason was quite surprising her (“seems like he cares about our cat,” that was what Shinobu probably had in mind).

Well, Hayato is actually the real victim of this family disharmony, a broken home kid, who in general also become 'troubled kid'. Shinobu wanted to blame him too for her trapped situation. Does this make her a bad mother?

The rent collector came and confronted the Kawajiri family. It turned out that the family was often in arrears on rent. Then if they often have difficulty in paying, why do they rent a house like this?

I think the house they rent is quite big, too big for their small family of only 3 members to live in. Unless they really plan to have a big family, but it was highly doubtful considering the relationship state between Shinobu and her husband.

Therefore, back to Shinobu's lifestyle, who used to date Kosaku just to look cool, so it's no wonder that this family forced themselves to rent a quite big house just to look cool too.

The cornered Kira (who did not know the lock combination of Kawajiri family’s safe) was forced to utilize his 「Killer Queen」 to trick the rent collector, and it worked.

And his mischief eventually impressed Shinobu and made her fall in love again.

Here I started to think that Shinobu’s real type of guy is a cool guy, not only from his outward appearance, but also by his nature that is kinda delinquent. Perhaps she had thought that Kosaku was that kind of person, but when she started living together with him, it turned out that he was a sub and hollow man.

After seeing her husband's change, since then for the first time Shinobu found the passion in her life. She's getting excited again and she was even the one attempting to make an approach, one of them is by serving him a tea…

…and her body…

DIU chapter 112: Kira Yoshikage's New Life - part 2

Kira almost broke his masquerade by killing Shinobu, but managed to surpressed his desire. Shinobu thought that Kosaku was either being aggressive for her liking or gentle (by unbuttoning her dress). Whatever it was, it made her fall in love with him even more.

Hayato the broken kid being weird for spying his parents’ bedroom, I don’t know since then. What was more important, he implied that his parents had not gotten laid together in a long time.

DIU chapter 127: The Cat Who Loved Kira - part 1

When a stray cat broke into the basement and being territorial, a frightened Shinobu asked Kosaku for help, which turned out to be part of her seduction attempt too. She really thought her husband was very handsome now. Surely when you fall in love, the person you have a crush on will look very attractive in your eyes.

The cat died and Kira had to burry him. Apparently, the cat had previously been pierced by a Stand arrow and he was reborn as a 'Stand'. The stray cat held a grudge against Shinobu and wanted to kill her, which ultimately forced Kira to protect her.

DIU chapter 129: The Cat Who Loved Kira - part 3

Now, moving on Kira’s POV for awhile, did he really care to Shinobu?

DIU chapter 129 & 130

I think, actually, there could be a chance for Kira to move on from his old life and try to live a new normal life. Though honestly I don’t condone his action of stealing Kosaku's identity (and even killing him) and stealing that person's life. But he could change himself for the better, love a woman in normal way, have a family and be a good husband & father… if only he wanted.

This option may be good for Kira, but is it for the good of the others?

After all, Kira was a serial killer who had been roaming around and living freely in Morioh, there had been many victims and none of them got justice.

Is it fair to just let him move on and have a better life?

I truly respect Araki's decision to consistently write him as 'the villain', irredeemable and deserves to be punished.

Back to Shinobu, now that stray cat had been dealt, to clear up Shinobu's confusion as a Standless person, Kira lied that she just fainted and had hallucinated prior to that.

DIU chapter 131: The Cat Who Loved Kira - part 5

And again, Shinobu shyly madly fell in love with her own husband and made another approachment attempt to reignite their love.

On the other hand, Hayato was increasingly suspicious of his father, who is he really?

Approaching Bites The Dust arc, Kira desperately hid his murder of Hayato, but in Shinobu's mind was only her concern for her husband: what happened to him? Is he alright?

DIU chapter 153: Another One Bites the Dust - part 1

Truly a progress, Shinobu who was originally a wife who was indifferent towards her husband, has now turned into a wife who is ready to take care her husband of her own accord.

DIU chapter 154: Another One Bites the Dust – part 2

In the end, during the BTD arc, Kira decided to entertain Shinobu for a while by giving her her long-awaited goodbye kiss, much to Hayato’s dismay. But if you put yourself on Shinobu’s POV, you too will definitely felt delighted at that time, as if your love has finally been reciprocated.

DIU chapter 159: Another One Bites the Dust – part 7

Remember when Shinobu wanted to blame Hayato for wasting her life? Eventually, she was also happy when her son displayed his affection for her too. Perhaps her annoyance at Hayato back then was actually her sadness over her son's cold behavior. But we also can't blame Hayato for acting like that, because he is also the victim, product of his dysfunctional family.

After the BTD arc ended and Kira died, getting his punishment over his deeds. At the same time, Kosaku was completely gone forever. Meanwhile what was happening in Kawajiri family was...

…an endless waiting by his wife who loves him very much.

DIU chapter 174: Goodbye, Morioh- Golden Hearts

And this is the effect of Kira's murders that have been allowed to run rampant. So it's only right that our protagonist ended it and brought him to justice.

Actually, I also don't agree that Shinobu has to suffer by waiting forever for her husband to return. The death of real!Kosaku in Aya's salon has become unknown to anyone (except Josuke's gang). But Kira's death as Kosaku had been witnessed by many.

But wasn't his face then crushed and unrecognizable? Does it matter? Before he died, his face was still quite recognizable right? In order to activate 「Bites The Dust」, he was about to tell his real name to a nurse, but it never happened.

There were Josuke's gang, including Hayato, right? I thought it was wise enough for Hayato to keep his mother in the dark regarding Kira's masquerade, that the husband she had loved all along was not her real husband, which meant that Kosaku's actual death at Aya’s salon did not need to be known to her.

Josuke’s gang or Hayato himself should have told the people at the spot that the one who had just died by an ambulance was 'his father'. Which in the end the news could soon reach Shinobu, so she did not have to suffer, wasting her entire life with false hopes.

What can we learn from this?

That as long as we are still together, there is still a chance to mend our relationship.

Especially for those of you who are already married and have families.

Divorce is indeed a solution if there is no way anymore (especially if 'abuse' is already involved).

However, this solution will leave another issue that can affect your life and that of your children’s.

What I want to say is, in the case of Kawajiri family, regardless of their conflict, there was no ‘abuse’ or 'violence' in it.

And that making ‘divorce’ as the last priority for solution.

Separation in a childless dating couple and separation in a married couple with children is a very different matter.

There must be one who initiates the change, in Kawajiri’s case, it was fake Kosaku (accidentally).

And also there must be one who welcome the change (and that’s Shinobu).

The tragic thing about this family is that the real Kosaku never get his chance.

But during his life before he crossed paths with Kira, did he even try?

Had it ever crossed his mind to make a change?

Maybe we can blame Shinobu instead, why didn't she make the 'change'?

Whatever it is, we shouldn’t cry over spilled milk, instead we should appreciate of how Shinobu welcomed the changes from her husband.

And when her love had grown back, it was Shinobu who tried to approach and win back her husband's heart.

Now if only… if only this was the real Kosaku…

… surely this Kawajiri family which began as an 'accident' and 'forced relationship' could have turned into a very harmonious family.

FIN

#kawajiri family #jojo meta #marriage life #shinobu kawajiri #kira yoshikage #kosaku kawajiri #hayato kawajiri #jjba part 4 #jojo's bizarre adventure #apparently kira sorta fixed a family only to hurting them even more #relationship fail #divorce #broken home

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maleyanderecafe · 3 years

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Hey there was a mobile game I wanted to recommend you check out! It’s called MazM: The Phantom of the Opera. Obviously the phantom himself is a well-known character and prime example of a yandere, and this version’s Raoul also takes on that trait a little (although it’s mostly because Christine is in a life or death situation and this he’s protective over her), he’s very sweet and doesn’t wait a moment to shower her with praise. Anyway it’s a pretty faithful retelling of the original book and was extra fun for me as a yandere-lover as you play as Christine caught in between the yandere and the actual boyfriend. I think it’s coming to the switch soon as well if you want to wait for that.

...Are you sure that Raoul just takes on this trait a bit...?

Joking aside, sorry it took me so long to answer this ask. I was originally going to watch a walkthrough on youtube, but then I realized that you said it would be on switch and since I just got my switch emulator, I ended up playing with a friend. I will say that there is a lot for me to say about this game, so this will be a long read.

First things first, I'll admit that I've never actually read or watched the Phantom of the Opera before, so I genuinely have no idea what happens in the story. This is where my friend who I was streaming for comes in because she has read the story so she helped fill me in on what happens (she's also making a yandere vn in the future which I will be spamming the heck out of because yandere vn). I think from what she told me, most of the story is relatively accurate, though some parts are changed for one reason or another (for instance, The Persian has a name in this game, but in the original, he doesn't), which has some pros and cons for some characters. Overall though, the story was pretty good for a first timer like me since it really let me experience what the Phantom of the Opera is truly about. I think the creator Mazm did a good job for historical detail, which makes sense considering their platform is about creating games that reinterpret famous stories (they've also done one for Wizard of Oz and Jekyll and Hyde which I sort of want to play), and there are a lot of different notes the player can collect in the game that give more historical insight into what is going on.

The story for the most part is pretty linear. There are some choices you can choose, but except for two, they don't really affect the story. For the most part, the game plays as a visual novel, though you do have to walk around to talk or interact with things to proceed the story. There are cats and notes that lie around the game too, with the notes giving more historical insight and the cats being used as hints in case you don't know where to go. The story is about a detective trying to find out the truth of the Phantom of the Opera at a request of a client whos husband was a victim of him, but most of the story is played through a flashback.

There are also small minigames as well that aren't too difficult, though I honestly felt like some of the minigames got to be tedious at times, specifically the one minigame where you have to press the order of the mirror combo which I found really annoying because besides the fact that I'm bad at those games, you had to do it every time you wanted to enter under the Opera house, which was just... ugh. The game itself seems much more optimized for mobile than it was for switch considering how slow the characters move (and its really slow walking to different places sometimes) as well as the fact that it takes forever to load between different scenes and there's no touch screen option for switch (that I know of). Plus the buttons for moving and pressing hints were annoying to deal with (though this could just be because I'm using an emulator). I also kept getting confused when I was playing, since sometimes I would walk around the entire opera house trying to figure out what to do next, only to learn that I was suppose to talk to someone that was literally five steps from where I spawned. The last thing I found annoying was the fact that there's no option to skip dialogue which is really annoying when I wanted to replay a specific part of the story to take some screenshots. If you play this game, it's probably better to play it on mobile than on switch.

In terms of artwork, Mazm's Phantom of the Opera is really gorgeous, from the overworld sprites to the dialogue sprites to the background and CGs. I love how cute the overworld sprites are (I think Jammes and Raoul's are my favorite, they're both so cute) and every background is really nice to walk through and gives a good atmosphere of what it's trying to show. The character sprites for each characters are nice and varied. I can always appreciate characters that have recognizable faces and shapes, since a lot of times I have face blindness when it comes to characters that look way too similar. The CGs of course are super well done and I love all of them. Overall, the artstyle of this game is very solid and I love the way it looks.

The main character of the story was Christine, who looks really good ( I really love her hair), was for the most part alright initially. While I found her to be a bit naive (because she believed that there was an actual Angel of Music when it was just... the Phantom), she was for the most part alright, and even ended up saving another character from the phantom. However, I found her actions annoying after she met the phantom, specifically the part where she agreed to stay underground with the phantom for two days and would be released as long as she didn't touch his mask, and guess what. Right as she was literally about to leave, SHE TAKES OFF HIS MASK, AND FOR WHAT? YOU WERE JUST ABOUT TO LEAVE?? The other thing that bothered me was the after being trapped with the Phantom for about a month, she is given free reign to go back above ground, under the conditions that she only goes to the opera house and at home. During this time, she's expected to break it off with Raoul, so she fakes a honeymoon with him before he leaves for the artic. However, during this time, she doesn't tell anyone, not even Raoul about what the Phantom is up to. She has an entire month, an ENTIRE MONTH to tell someone that the Phantom is likely to hurt people (as previously he had dropped a chandelier on top of the audience) and she just... didn't. Understandably, she might have been afraid that the Phantom might have heard her, but still, what is he going to do to the possible 100 people that Christine could have told about him. She could have saved people from death if something like that were to happen. Near the end, she does get proper character development and learns to choose things for her sake and not others, which was pretty nice and does stand up to the Phantom after all the trauma (and doesn't get stockholm sydrome, thank goodness), but I still think that a lot of her actions could have probably been written better to make her less naive (since apparently in the original she was about 16ish while in this remake she's about 20 so it's less awkward between her and the phantom).

Raoul is the next character I'll be talking about, because even though he is very adorable, he also has one braincell and talks about Christine way too much. My friend and I actually decided to make a counter on how many times Erik and Raoul say "Christine." Erik says Christines name 128 times and Raoul... says it 340 times. This isn't even counting his introduction and only starts up to when Erik is introduced as a formal character and also doesn't count any time he says it in the overworld. 340! My friend kept on joking around that because Raoul says Christine so much, his brother Phillipe became an alcoholic because he's so tired of Raoul talking about Christine. Raoul only really has like three things going for him: the fact that he was in the military, the fact that he's part of the Chagny household and Christine, and that's it. Throughout the story, his goals are pretty much always related to Christine, whether it be to give gifts to Christine, being worried about her or trying to protect Christine from the Phantom. When the chandelier drops on half the crowd during one of the performances, instead of being worried for them or trying to get out of the Opera House, he instead looks for Christine, who is on stage and quite literally in the safest location within the theater. I would consider him a redeemed/protective yandere though, considering his priority is always Christine (he even gives up his own family name to be with her) and he's always trying to protect her. There's a part of the story where Raoul becomes really unhinged when it comes to protecting Christine, lashing out her her friends and other members of the Opera house. He does some really dumb stuff because of the Phantom, specifically throwing away Christine's ring that she got from the Phantom (that she also literally told him before that as long as she's wearing the ring she wouldn't be harmed by the phantom and he just...?? okay??). When he's tortured in the mirror room, he hallucinates Christine blaming him for her capture, and he even cries while hallucinating that Christine friendzones him (which I though was actually really funny, even if it was a tad bit stupid). His redemption comes near the end of the story where he apologizes for being so emotional and realizing that he was a bit of an obsessive beast, and in one ending he lets Christine go to travel the world. To be honest, I don't know if Raoul would continue to be as protective and obsessed with her even after the Phantom's death, but I guess there's not really any way to know.

The Phantom, or Erik (which I know is his cannon name but it makes me laugh because he really doesn't look like an Erik) is the main villain of the story. Unfortunately, in this version, I don't think I can call him a yandere, for one simple character: Melek. Melek, as far as I know isn't in the original story, is a prisoner that Erik has after she refused to marry her. As a character, I do actually like Melek since she's the one of the more sensible characters in the story and she's the more rational one between her and Christine, but her role in the story basically deconfirms Erik as a yandere, at least in this version. For one, Melek is a blind maid of Erik that he did fall in love with and trap, similar to how Christine was, which kind of comes off as Erik being the kind of person who would trap any girl that he likes. Even if this is the case, I don't understand why Erik would keep her alive even after she fell for Christine. Supposedly the reason is that Erik wanted to make Christine feel despair and he did attempt to kill her, but Melek survives and he just... doesn't do anything with her. Honestly, if Melek were straight up not in the story, I would have put him as a yandere because pretty much all of his other actions point to a more possessive/worship type of yandere, but because of Melek it's just not possible in my eyes. Besides that Erik sort of reminds me of a chunni in this version (he's like this absolute darkness is my curse! Like people with 7th grade syndrom seem to have), it was kind of hard for me to take him seriously in certain times. He is very intimidating when he threatens Christine, but his overdramatic nature (which I know is something he's always known for, just this version is uh...) really makes him seem like a child. Erik is for sure suppose to be more antagonistic in this version, considering the addition of Melek and his general actions of possession towards Christine and his disdain for Raoul, but near the end we do see more of his story and we see just how devastating his life is from the moment of birth. I did feel really bad for him when Hatim/The Persian keeps on mentioning the prince he used to work with because its really obvious that he still has trauma from it (and he keeps begging him to not talk about his past and the Persian just... keeps traumatizing him I guess) and the fact that he was treated so badly because of his appearance, but this doesn't excuse his actions in the story. Christine does try to sympathize with him using her own tragic backstory, which Erik kind of pushes away (like bro, we're not trying to see whose parents are worse, she's just trying to sympathize with you, dang) as not being tragic. I think that Mazm did present him pretty well in this story, not showing just his antagonistic side but also his more tragic side. Sadly, like I said, I can't consider him a yandere because of the addition of Melek, at least not in this version.

In terms of other characters, I really like the trio of Meg Giry, Sorelli and Jammes- the friends of Christine. From what I can tell, they're all a bit more aged up in this version, with Sorelli being the oldest and Jammes being the youngest and I feel like they gave more character to them than in the original version. Sorelli is the head of the dancers and the dating partner of Phillip de Chagny, Raoul's older brother and she's the mature and strong willed one of the group, wielding a blade that she uses to protect her friends. I like the fact that they made her a bit more protective and in one of the overworld sprites its mentioned via rumor that Phillip fell in love with her after he saw Sorelli swing her dagger, which I thought was pretty cute. At the end though, after Phillips death, she realizes that she was struggling too hard to climb up the social ladder and decides to forge her own path. In the beginning she attempts to protect her and her friends from the Phantom, declaring that she'll stab him if she sees him. Next is Meg Giry, and from what my friend told me, she was very young in the original books and kind of scardy cat. In this version, she's a bit older but maintains the scardy cat position, and is very terrified of the Phantom. She does gain more character development during the story, standing up to her mother and the managers and overall being a more assertive and confident person, which I thought was a nice touch. Last but certainly not least is my best girl Jammes. In the original story, she barely makes an appearance, but in Mazm they made her quite literally the best character. For one, the canonical reason why there are so many cats hanging out in the opera house is that Jammes keeps on feeding them and letting them in and she has named all of them after the Opera House staff. Jammes loves to spin and has a cute animation and while she can be loud and a bit strange sometimes, she can be smart and assertive when she needs to. Jammes always pushes the other three into being better and protects them when needed (for instance, when Phillip lashes out at Sorelli, she steps in and demands that he apologize for his actions) and can be really smart at times (she's the only character that attempts to at least cover her mouth when the Phantom's fragrance, a hallucinogenic gas, starts to fill up the box seat, despite others who have been in there not even trying) and is the one who stands up for Christine's abuse as well as for the dancers at the opera house being treated unfairly by the manager as she organizes a strike against them. She also becomes part of the women's suffrage after the events of the story. I could go on and on about Jammes, but instead I'll leave a cute picture of her at the end of this entire analysis. Besides those three, I did like Carlotta, the original singing lead of the opera house. Originally, she became an antagonist towards Christine after she became the lead singer, however, she did apologize to her afterwards and befriended her once more before traveling the world. I love her interactions with Raoul because she basically said that Raoul only has Christine and military training and when he gets angry and lashes out, Carlotta glares and him, causing him to cower (this actually does happen multiple times), and I just found that really, really funny. Mifoid, though useless in the story is actually pretty cute as well, I love his bouncing animation. The last character I'll talk about is Phillip because he became meme material for me and my friend considering he probably is so tired of Raoul talking about Christine (we joked that the reason he was sent to military was so that he didn't have to hear her name again) and while he is mostly a decent but strict character in the story, his last appearance really makes him out as a jerk. I did think it was kind of weird that Phillip was so willing to let Raoul go to the Artic mission considering nobody that has gone there has ever returned, and he was rather elitest towards him, not letting him marry Christine because she's of lower

class but during his last chapter before he dies, he goes on a frenzy after he and Raoul have a fight, revealing to Sorelli that he only dated her for fun and not to actually settle down with her, which is just horrible. It's a bit sad though that Raoul only saw him as someone who tried to get rid of him considering that Phillip did raise Raoul and that his last actions were an attempt to save Phillip from the phantom, and yet Raoul barely has a reaction after seeing his body and doesn't even go to his funeral. It's really sad that Raoul didn't even really cry after seeing Phillip's body, considering that he was basically his father figure.

Overall, it's a good game to play and a good retelling of the Phantom of the Opera. I wouldn't consider the Phantom to be a yandere in this game, but I do think that Raoul is one. Thank you for this recommendation!

#asks #male yandere #yandere boy #yandere #recommendation

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alwaysachorusgirl · 3 years

Text

Adoption Day

Pairing: Frederick Chilton x Female Reader

Word Count: 2089

For: Covers the Animal Shelter square for @adarafaelbarba 's fall moodboard bingo

TW: very brief mention of past childhood abuse and animal abandonment, but other than that, it's mostly fluff

Dedication: This is for the world's best cat mom, @madamsnape921 ,because it's her birthday! Go send her some birthday love today!

Author's Note: Jumping back a little in the Cat Daddy Frederick timeline to cover Buttercup's adoption story. Per my previously established continuity, this would take place in January, right after New Year's, and prior to "Not According to Plan"

Tags: @itsjustmyfantasyroom @prurientpuddlejumper @thatesqcrush @welcometothemxdhouse @raulesparza4eva @teamsladsandgents @rosequcrtz

The winter wind howled outside the window and snow drifted across the windowpanes, but inside Frederick Chilton’s ornate home you were safe and warm. No, our home, I live here now, you thought to yourself. You were still getting used to thinking of it as your home, too. You were unpacking the last of the boxes from your recent move. A fire was roaring in the living room fireplace, giving the room a cozy, comforting glow. You inhaled the aroma of the hearty vegetable stew that was cooking in the crockpot in the kitchen, and your stomach growled. You were going to need to take a dinner break soon, and as if he was reading your mind, Frederick entered the room and came over to where you were placing your books on the expansive built-in shelves.

“How goes it with the books? Do you need more shelf space? I can always move somethings into my office if you need more.”

“Thank you, Frederick, but don’t worry; I think I have more than enough. I am, however, getting rather hungry. I think it’s time we ate dinner, don’t you?

“I couldn’t agree more, my love, shall I set the table?” he asked, taking your hand, and helping you to your feet.

“Thank you, Frederick, that would be lovely.”

*****************

“This stew is fantastic, my love! We’ll most certainly have to use this recipe again.”

When you didn’t respond right away, Frederick started to worry and reached for your hand. “Darling?”

“Oh! Sorry! I zoned out for a moment, must be more tired than I thought; Thank you, Frederick, I have a whole slew of crock pot recipes that are perfect for cold winter days.”

“Y/N, are you alright? Have I done something wrong? Is it the house? Is there something you’re not happy with?”

“What? Oh, Frederick, no!” You squeezed his reassuringly. “You haven’t done anything wrong, my love, and the house is perfectly fine. It’s just…” you paused, not sure how to broach your thoughts.

“What is it? Whatever you need, I’ll make sure you have it! Cost is no object!”

You took a breath and tried to collect your thoughts. You loved cats, but your previous apartment had not allowed pets. You had promised yourself that when you eventually moved you would be a cat mom again. It had been far too long. But it was something that you and Frederick hadn’t discussed yet, and you had no idea what his feelings were on the subject.

“What did you think about getting a cat?” You blurted out, bracing yourself for what you were sure was going to be an argument.

It was now Frederick’s turn to go silent, taken aback by your unexpected query. He mulled it over in his head before answering.

“Honestly, my love, I’ve never thought about it before. I never had a pet of any kind growing up. My parents did not allow animals in the house.”

“Oh, Frederick, I’m so sorry, I didn’t know.” In theory, you knew you probably should have guessed that. You knew that Frederick’s father had been a hard, cruel man, and had been abusive toward Frederick and his mother. Frederick’s mother had been so worn down by it that she eventually shutdown, mentally and emotionally, and neglected to protect her son when he needed it the most. Of course, they hadn’t allowed pets, they hadn’t even allowed their son to have a normal childhood, or an ounce of happiness.

“My darling, you have nothing to apologize for,” said Frederick, placing soft kisses on the back of your hand. “If it’s a cat you want, then a cat you shall have. I’ll do some research after we finish here. Cats need supplies, right? Food, litter, toys, those fancy cat trees, cute little sweaters?”

****************

After dinner you and Frederick sat side-by-side on the couch with your laptops, him researching what kind of supplies you going to need to buy, and you were looking at your local SPCA’s website.

“Good god, I had no idea how many different types of cat litter there were!”

“Oh, Frederick, if you think that’s bad, wait until you see how competitive the cat food market is. Hmm…that’s interesting…”

“What is it?” asked Frederick, looking over at your laptop.

“This listing here,” you said, pointing at a blank gray box. “There should be a picture here, like there is for the other listings, but it’s blank. It says it’s supposed to be a 2-month-old black female…. hang on; I have an idea.”

You grabbed your phone off the coffee table and scrolled through your contacts until you found the name you were looking for. You hit “Call” and waited.

“Hello?” A voice finally picked up on the other end.

“Joanne! Hi! It’s Y/N. How are you?”

“I’m great, how are you? It’s been ages since the last time we hung out.”

“I’m good, and you’re right; it has been too long. Is this a good time to talk?”

“Sure! What’s up?”

“Do you still work for the county SPCA?”

“Oh, you bet I do! Oh my god, are you finally in the market to adopt?”

“Yes, I am, and I have a question about one of the cat listings on the website. The one that’s missing a picture?”

“Yes, I just noticed that a few hours ago. Our website person put that up prematurely. The kitten was just spayed, and normally we wait until the animal has had adequate recovery time before we add them to the site, but accidents happen. Last I checked, the little one is recovering nicely and should be ready to interact a couple days. She’s the sweetest thing. Someone dumped her in a cardboard box at our front door. She had a leg injury, but that’s also healing up. She loves to play, loves to cuddle, and I’ll think she’ll thrive in a good home. Would you like to make an appointment to see her?”

“Yes, I would! What time slots do you have available?”

*******************

A few days later, you and Frederick walked arm in arm into the county SPCA. Frederick had rush-ordered all the supplies you thought you’d need and then some. You both excited and nervous. You’d already taken a huge step by moving in together, and now you were adopting a pet. You looked over at Frederick and noticed the uncertainty in his eyes. He also seemed leaning on his cane for support. He always seemed to do that when he was unsure about something. You gave his arm a gentle squeeze and kissed his cheek.

“It’s going to be okay, Frederick, you’re to be a wonderful cat dad. I believe in you.”

Frederick blushed and placed a soft kiss on your temple.

“Thank you, my love, I appreciate your faith in me, even though I’m still not sure what’s done to deserve it, or you.”

Before you could respond to that, Joanne came out her office and rushed toward you.

“Y/N! It’s so good to see you!”

“It’s good to see you, too, Joanne.” You enveloped her in a big hug and then motioned to Frederick. “Joanne, this is Dr. Frederick Chilton, my Frederick.”

Frederick gave you the most loving of looks, and nearly melted into a puddle at your feet at sound of you referring to him as “your Frederick.”

“Nice to meet you, Dr. Chilton,” said Joanne, extending her hand.

“And you,” he replied, shaking hands.

“Well, I suppose you want to meet the little one; right this way!”

You and Frederick followed Joanne to cat section of the shelter. You walked past several cats, each one trying to get your attention from their enclosures. If you had your way, you’d take them all home, but you didn’t think Frederick was quite ready for that yet; but maybe one day…

“Here she is, “announced Joanne, stopping in front of one of the enclosures. A tiny black, fluffy kitten was inside, and her eyes lit up when she saw you. She was immediately on her feet, and you noticed she still had a slight limp in her injured leg, but she was full of energy and mewing incessantly. Joanne opened the door and carefully lifted her out. You reached out to take her, but the impatient kitten leapt out of Joanne’s hands and into your waiting arms.

“Oh! Hello! Hi baby, hi sweetheart,” you cooed.

“Mew, mew, mew!”

You looked into her eyes, and it was love at first sight. You did your best to hold onto her, shifting and adjusting your arms to accommodate her constant movement and attempts to climb up your shoulder. You gave her a little scratch between her ears and kissed her head. She was perfect.

“Mew! Mew!”

“Yes, baby, it’s okay, I’ve got you, I’ve got you.”

Frederick stood there watching you with the kitten, completely dumbstruck. Just when he thought he couldn’t fall anymore in love with you, you had to go and surprise him. You were a natural cat mom, cradling the tiny ball of fluff and talking to her like she was a human. He saw the kitten rub her nose against your chin and looked like she was giving you kisses. He also saw the look of pure love and joy on your face, and he lived for that, wanted to see that every day. He didn’t know anything about raising a cat, but for you, he would try.

**************

Joanne led you to a visitor’s room so that you and Frederick could spend some quality time getting to know the kitten. Frederick removed his coat and offered to take the kitten so that you could take off yours. You demonstrated how to hold the kitten and then handed her to Frederick. He held her close to chest and sat down.

“Mew?” the kitten looked up at him, confused as to who this new person was.

“It’s alright, little one, I’ve got you,” he tried to reassure her. A lock of his normally perfectly quaffed hair suddenly flopped in his face, and the kitten’s eyes grew wide.

“Mew?” she raised a paw and tentatively batted at Frederick’s hair. “Mew…”

“Oh, that’s adorable,” you said, plopping down next to them on a bean bag chair. You saw the smile on his face and nudged him with your elbow. “See? She likes you. And I think she wants to play.” You looked around the room and saw the toy boxes, filled with various dog and cat toys, but then something else caught your eye. “Frederick?”

“Yes, my love?”

“Hand her back to me and take off your scarf, please.”

He did as he was told. You carefully placed the kitten on the carpet and proceeded to dangle the scarf in front if her. Her eyes went wide again, and then she crouched, wiggled her backside, and pounced. Her little paws batted at the scarf, then she would roll around kick at it with her hind legs.

“It certainly looks like she’s enjoying herself,” Frederick chuckled. “So, what are we going to call her?”

“I was thinking ‘Buttercup”,” you said matter-of-factly.

“I am not the least bit surprised,” he replied, immediately picking up on your reference. He looked at the kitten. “Well, what do you think about that little one?”

“Mew?”

“Your name,” you told her, “Buttercup, do you like it?”

“Mew, mew.” She forgot about the scarf and crawled into your lap, kneading you with her paws.

“I think she likes it.” You threw Frederick a smile.

“Yes, I quite think she does. I have an idea, how about a story? Would you like that Buttercup?”

“Mew.” She replied with a yawn,

“Darling, if you check your bag, I believe you’ll find a book there.”

You checked your purse, and sure enough, in the largest section was a children’s book, one that you instantly recognized from your own childhood.

“If You Give A Mouse A Cookie?”

“It came highly recommended by the lady at the bookstore.”

“It’s perfect, Frederick.” You handed him the book and leaned your head against his knee. As he began to read, Buttercup curled up in your lap and shut her eyes, she was soon fast asleep, purring away. When he finished reading, Frederick caressed your cheek with hand to get your attention.

“So, shall we go find Joanne and make it official?”

“Yes,” you replied, gazing down at Buttercup, “If we don’t take her home today, I think I’ll cry.”

“Then let’s go fill out the paperwork and bring her home.”

#frederick chilton x reader #frederick chilton x female reader #frederick chilton #cat daddy frederick #frederick chilton imagines #hannibal #hannibal fanfiction #adarafaelbarbaseptmeberbingo #my writing

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fosermi · 3 years

Text

SEMI BACK FROM THE DEAD PEOPLE

That's right! I'm back! And I bring to you CHAPTER 3 OF GUARDIAN MACAQUE AU

WHY?! Well because I couldn't sleep well and it's 5 am fuck my headache I give you content!! Fair warning: Macaque is a soft monkey especially to kids AND YOU CAN PRY THIS HC FROM MY COLD DEAD HANDS ABDJFKCMCM

Some days, Biming would leave to sell the rice cultivated in their field to the neighbouring village. An oddity, Hóu realised. Why sell to another village? He didn't understand… After all, there were other houses in their village.

"Hóu?" Ai's soft voice called for the demon. Oddly enough, it wasn't her usual tone that came through her call.

Immediately detecting the shift from her usual beat, the black monkey jumped down from his position on the plum tree that grew in the back garden of the couple's home. The tree upon which the monkey would spend most of his free time on whenever he could. "You called, Mrs. Ai?"

"Oh! Yes, dear…" her voice dripped with worry - fear even. In her arms a red cloak, outstretched as if allowing him to take it. "Could you please accompany Biming to the town today…?" Her eyes glimmering under the morning sun with worry, begged the black monkey to take on her request.

Hóu, with an immediate nod, complied as he gently took the cloak from Ai's grasp. Hesitantly, the black monkey built up enough courage to ask the kind lady, her worry affecting his own.

"Mrs. Ai… is everything alright…?" His hand reached out to Ai’s in an attempt to comfort her as his eyes locked with hers, taking notes of the high level of worry embedded deep within her honey-brown eyes.

Seeing the concern in Hóu's golden eyes, Ai's tense shoulders fell as she let out a shaky breath. "Ling Fa… he warned us that demons moved in close to the rout Biming takes to the other village…"

Ling Fa… yes…

He was the family's guardian spirit… it was his duty to protect the family, right? Of course he would warn the kind couple.

By late morning, Biming and Hóu had headed out on the road on the small mule-pulled cart with their cargo safely secured. Ling Fa had stayed behind to ensure Ai's safety as he would not have been much help with manual labor.

Hóu rode on the back of the cart as his mind drifted off to the thoughts of the strange family guardian. They had previously met a couple of times. Ling Fa wasn't a concerning figure, in fact Hóu believed he was incapable of fighting due to his pacifistic tendencies.

Throughout the journey, Biming and Hóu held up a small lighthearted conversation, a conversation that seemed to have only lasted a couple of minutes was in fact just two hours.

Soon the duo were at town close to noon, Hóu couldn't believe how lively everything was! Carts and vendors and buyers were everywhere! If he was being honest, Hóu's entire world seemed to start spinning due to the overload of his senses.

"Welcome to the market, Hóu!" Biming said with a bright smile as he handed Hóu some earplugs. "They might not completely drown out all the new senses but its something at least… if you ever need a breath at all, then tell me and we can go to a more tame part of the town were we can rest for a bit"

Hóu's reply came in the form of a nod. However, even though his senses are over exerting himself, Hóu knew that he had to allow Biming to sell their crops so they could earn the money needed. So, the black monkey decided to sit right behind the cart after putting on the earplugs, mostly hidden from the front view as she observed how Biming bargained and sold his crops.

Eventually, daylight started diminishing as the sun was starting to head down the horizon, turning the shy a nice shade that reminded the monkey of orange peaches… something about the sunset seems to have upset the demon and he felt a pang of pain in his chest.

Upon noticing the sadness embedded on the monkey’s face, Biming decided that it was time to head home. "Hóu, let's go home." Came the familiar voice of the young man that got Hóu moving onto the back of the cart, and once again head off back home. "We should be back home just after sunset" Said Biming in an attempt to comfort his companion, which seemed to have worked somewhat.

The ride back didn't have many complications, it was a smooth ride back with a few conversations every now and again. Once home, Biming and Hóu carried their goods into the home as they announced their return, only to be greeted by the smell of Ai's amazing cooking as they sat down by the table to eat.

Biming was telling Ai how well Hóu had taken to the city and how well behaved he was. He kept on flattering the black monkey demon which got Hóu to stutter every now and again when he decided to speak up. Soon enough, it was time to head to bed after it was decided that from then on, Hóu would accompany Biming to the market.

His days spent here in the small farm house by the valley with Ai and Biming went by faster than he expected. And soon, they would have a new addition to their family in the form of a child between the couple.

The couple at first didn't know how Hóu would react to children, as throughout Ai's pregnancy, he had done his best to avoid her as much as possible without angering her. He however instead spent his time with Biming learning how to trade and sell as well as bargain and buy goods.

When their daughter was born, the couple found something they never had expected to see. That night they had awoken to the sound of soft cries coming from the adjacent room that Hóu had offered the baby to stay in with him so he could make sure that their daughter was safe from all harm. Surprisingly, Hóu had also swore it as his duty out of the blue one night before she was even born.

What surprised them however, was what they saw in the room that night. They had found Hóu gently cradling their small daughter in his arms. Biming most of all was surprised at how Hóu could be so delicate with such a small fragile being and yet possess strength strong enough to carry the entire cart filled with supplies.

Hóu looked over at the couple with worry laced all very his face. "S-sorry… she won't stop crying… she must be hungry!" It surprised Ai how well he knew how to manage a baby and how he could tell what was wrong. She stood there for a moment as she smiled at the panicked monkey before taking her daughter to feed her in the other room, leaving Biming and Hóu together in the room.

Biming sat down next to Hóu on the bed who seemed a bit anxious. "Is something the matter Hóu?" Came the concerned question from Biming.

Hóu's tail flicked anxiously like an irritated cat, he lowered his head and talked in barely a whisper "she's just so small Biming… will she really survive?"

With a comforting hand on Hóu's shoulder, a smile found its way onto Biming's face "with you worrying about her like this… I know she'll be perfectly fine Hóu…" and with that, Ai came back in, carrying their sleeping daughter in her arms.

Without a second to lose, Hóu was up on his feet to give the bed to the sleeping baby. But instead, Ai gave him the small bundle of joy with a smile. Something within him clicked that night, and for the first time he remembered something from his past.

A conversation?

"Hey, [~~~] why so stiff?"

"Because! They're so small! So defenseless! How can they survive?!" A chuckle rang out throughout what seemed like a cave as the sound echoed.

"They're children! Of course, they're small! But hey! They seem to like you!"

"I… I guess they do…"

"You know… if you're really worried about them so much why not take care of them?"

"Don't you already do that?"

"Well, technically, yes? But what I meant was you could watch over the little ones and make sure they're safe?"

"... alright, I'll do it!"

Hóu held the small child close to his chest, a stifled sob escaped him as a few tears flowed down his face and onto the blankets that wrapped around the baby. This concerned the couple as they barely see Hóu cry, in fact. This is only the second time they've seen him cry ever since finding him that fateful day.

Just before they could react, Hóu faced them. Face stained with tears but his eyes held a strong determination. "No matter what, I'll make sure she becomes big and strong. I swear on my life"

With his sudden declaration, the couple found a sense of peace and comfort. Ever since then, Hóu had appointed himself their daughter's caretaker and would help Ai and Biming with their daughter in whatever way he could. There had been countless times when Ai or Biming would search for their daughter only to find her asleep on Hóu who had her safely asleep on or under his favorite tree in their garden, sometimes asleep himself.

Such were the peaceful times, the days he wouldn't have to worry about much except for their family's safety. Nothing could happen to them, he used to think. Not until the incident.

Golden eyes fluttered open as he heard a faint sound of someone calling out to him. "I'm heading off to work dad!! Text you later!!" Followed by a door slamming shut and a soft ringing of a bell.

With a sigh, the black monkey sat up and combed through his messy black hair before getting up and heading to the bathroom to freshen up. Mi Hóu looked at the mirror and examined himself only to be taken back to see a human face before remembering that his life with Ai, Biming, and their daughter Chu-Hua had ended a couple of hundred years ago.

He had remembered everything since that time, and his true name is Liu er Mihóu otherwise known as the Six Eared Macaque. And he remembered that at this current time, he has a son. A son that he had to look out for in a world of hidden demons. But here's the catch, he can't let his son know that he himself is a demon even though he already knows about demons. Which is why he uses a human disguise.

"Another regular day of work I guess…" he mumbled as he heard the ringing of the bell hung at the door indicating that someone had entered their home, or to be more specific, his clinic. Little did he know that this day would be the end of his daily routine of curing demons and teaching at a dojo.

#monkie kid #lego monkie kid #lego monkie kid au #monkie kid au #guardian macaque #guardian macaque au #lmk macaque #six eared macaque #monkie kid macaque #listen i live for dad macaque #and now i give you macaque being soft with babies #my writing

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mariamermaid · 3 years

Text

Patronus-Protector

Sirius x Reader

Summary: Much to your dislike, your friends have been hiding something from you. Now it is your turn to find out what has been slumbering beneath the surface of the marauder group…

Words: 3.1k

A/N: requested by @divergirl9-blog Sorry it took so long!

Warnings: swearing, blood, little bit angsty

Patronus{m}, Latin- Protector

“Have they been avoiding you?”

Lilly frowned as you sat down across from her in the great hall. It was a custom habit of the two of you to do the potions homework on Tuesdays together. But your mind was everywhere but on the potions.

“What do you mean?”

“Don´t act stupid, Evans. Did James tell you anything?” You scrunched your nose and leaned a little over the table, so the red-head couldn´t avoid your glance. She held in for a second; James hadn´t particularly mentioned anything. On the other hand, the past times she had seen her somewhat secret boyfriend, there wasn´t much talking involved.

“Not really”, Lilly sighed and tried to get back on the homework. But you were too stubborn and took away her pen. You wouldn´t let this slip another time. “Not really? Is that all you got Lilly?”

“For Merlin´s sake Y/n, I don’t really know! He mentioned something about going to the Shrieking Shack.”

It was your turn to furrow your brows in confusion. “What do they want there?” You asked muttering more to yourself. Lilly rolled her green eyes, until they landed on a certain dark-haired boy. You quickly followed her glance, finding Sirius standing across the hall. It seemed like he had either watched, maybe even eavesdropped, but before you could further question the whole situation, he left the hall with hasty steps.

“You´re done, Black”, you cursed as you hurried after him and to hell with the homework, which you left behind.

Lilly watched as you left, her head back in her hand. “Young love.”

It was no secret to her that you felt a little more than just friendship for the heartbreaker boy. It was also no secret, that Sirius Black was only heartless until it came to you.

There was no thing he wouldn´t do for you, much against his own denial. However, Sirius was best at one thing; protecting you. Mostly, from himself.

Oh yes, he wouldn´t trade your long friendship for anything or anyone, but his craving to feel your soft lips on his, was getting stronger by the day. The fear of breaking in took away his sleep. But as the time the night came, he realized the empty spot in the bed next to him. However, he decided on the empty spot, instead of losing you forever. He had determined years ago, his purpose to protect you was greater than his pain.

You made it hard though. Especially as you ran after him through the halls, after he was explicitly advised not to talk to you with the upcoming full moon. It would be hard to contain Remus and James couldn´t babysit a werewolf and an Animagus at the same time. Especially, if said Animagus was only focused on protecting the girl he loved.

“Sirius!”

He ignored you.

“Sirius Black if you do not stop running, I´ll hex you!” Finally, he stopped in his tracks. So abruptly, you almost ran right into him.

“For Merlin´s sake, you better tell me what is going on!” You scolded him angrily. He avoided your eyes, staring out of the window instead.

“I don’t know-“

“Don´t!” You became angrier by the second, but beneath all that anger was hurt. Why didn´t he tell you? What had you done, that made him loose trust?

“Don´t do this, Sirius. We don´t have secrets from each other, I´ve known you my entire life. If I did something wrong-“

It was his time to cut you off.

“You didn´t do anything wrong!” He assured you quickly and you sighed, as he finally starred into your mellow face.

“But clearly something is wrong and as long as you prefer to keep it from me, instead of letting me help, you can shove our friendship up your ignorant ass!”

He wanted to prevent exactly what just happened; you getting hurt. But you were hurt and his actions felt like betrayal to you.

Angrily and gloomy, you left him standing in the empty hall.

For the next two days, neither of the marauder´s saw much of you. Lily, who shared her room with you was the only one. Sirius, who had given up on trying, after your recent fight, only watched you from afar. Both James and Remus attempted to catch you after class, but you slipped away and hurried back into safeties of your room. All of them worried about the silence that hung like dark thunder clouds, but the full moon was approaching fast. They had bigger worries.

It was on the second day of your oppressive silence; night was approaching and your stomach growled in hunger. You had skipped dinner in order to evade James and Peter, who sat with Lilly. It was weird seeing them without Remus or Sirius, but you hadn´t given it much thought. They were probably up to no good as always.

But as you snuck out your room hoping to get at least a late-night snack, you heard toned down voices. Waiting at the end of the stairs of the common room, you listened to James and Peter.

“Come on, Potter! You can always talk to your girl, but we have to get going now! Sirius will need our help.”

James sighed defeated. “If this continues, Lilly won´t talk to me just like Y/N.”

“If Sirius would´ve acted a little more elaborated, she wouldn´t be as pissed as she is. That boy knows how to charm every girl, but her.”

James snickered at Peter´s comment. “You´re right, let´s go!”

You had no idea what was happening, but your feet acted on pure instinct as you hurried after the two boys. After all, curiosity killed the cat.

They left the school building and you had trouble keeping up, cursing at Merlin for their endurance from the quidditch training. You watched as they arrived at the whomping willow, hiding behind rocks and high grass, and then, they disappeared.

How did the old willow not even attempt to crush them? You eyed the plant structure from a safe distance, analyzing where James had previously stood. Something was there, you couldn´t fully make it out, but James had leaned down a little to touch the willow.

“For Merlin´s sake, those boys will be the death of me!”, you cursed whispering as you hurried to the willow. Hastily and purely relying on hope, you searched the plant for anything. It was your luck, that you found the knot at the base and a secret passage opened up.

Your mouth slightly opened and quietly you admitted, that the marauder weren´t completely stupid. At least not all the time (often enough though). It was a rather awkward slide into the passage, but luckily, James and Peter were already more far off and they didn´t hear your stumbling.

It didn´t take long until you found yourself at the shrieking shack, slowly the pieces were put together. However, you already heard loud voices coming from inside.

At this point, your gut feeling took over your prudence and you hurried inside, following the yelling. Screams from all of the marauders echoed through the old shack and you panted, when all kind of horrible scenarios came to your head. Argument or not, they were your friends and you´d do everything to protect them. With your wand safely in your hand, you entered the large room, but what came to your view wasn´t at all what you had expected…

At the back of the stone wall was Remus… But he wasn´t himself.

In the rise of the silver full moon his eyes turned savage and fur crawled across his skin until he was fully covered. You heard the breaking from the metal chains as he rose from the ground, taller than ever before. A gasp left your lips, which brought all the attention to you.

“Remus!”

James, Sirius and Peter exchanged quick looks, it wasn´t their first battle against the full moon, but this time you were a new meeple in the game. James and Peter lunged forward, trying to keep Remus, who was in full werewolf mode, back and Sirius ran to your side. “What are you doing here?” He asked furious and your head snapped at him.

“Me? You were the one lying to me! I wouldn´t have come, but you were hiding something from me!”

“I wasn´t!”

“Uhm, how about Remus being a werewolf?”

“I wanted to tell you!”

Your argument was interrupted as both James and Peter were thrown against the wall, Remus was on the loose. Sirius who had positioned himself safely in front of you, let out a growl as well.

In the next second, he jumped forward, his clothes ripping and when landing, the four paws scratched across the wooden floor. Yes, you had spent many hours cuddled together with Sirius in his hound form, watching sunsets and sometimes sunrises as well. But it was the first time, you witnessed him other than an adorable dog. This time, he truly seemed dangerous.

Not only he, but Remus as well and you felt fear growing. You didn´t know what they were capable of. Barely realizing how Peter grabbed your arm to pull you back from the fight, you watched as the two shadow figures began battling.

“Y/n stay back”, Peter tried to remind you, but you too captivated. Both he and James couldn’t do much, until Sirius was thrown against a nearby dresser, which fell to pieces. Sirius bellowed in pain and while James tried to help the hound pack on his feet (or paws), you placed yourself right in between him and Remus.

“Remus, remember who you are! We´re your friends!” You exclaimed, but aimed with your wand right at him. No one hurt your friends and seeing Sirius down, felt like a wakeup call.

Remus however didn´t listen and as he made another step closer to you, you were left no choice.

“Stupify!”

The red light bathed the dim room, but then the darkness crawled back into the corners and your senses. Your eyes had to adjust again, but then he was suddenly right in front of you. A sharp pain emerged, as you held up your arms to protect your body and head, then you felt yourself hitting the ground. Everything was spinning, you had lost your wand and burning red liquid ran down your outer, lower arms. Screams echoed further in the shallow room and you did your best to concentrate. Sirius´s dark shadow lunged off the ground and threw Remus back down, howling and growls cut through the air. But the two of them disappeared in blurriness. Two pair of arms grabbed your side.

“Y/n, can you hear us?” James´s distant voice rang through your mind; you formed a faint nod.

Peter starred at the continues blood stream.

“James, she´s losing a lot of blood, we need to get her to the infirmary.” Peter quietly explained and shock as well as fear was clearly written in both of their faces. “What about them?”

James felt like vomiting at the sight of your injury and feared the fact, that you were zooning out more and more. But Sirius had Remus pinned down, and Peter carefully, but rapidly put your arms around James.

“Get her to the infirmary, I´ll help Sirius in tying him down, go!”

It was at the edge of your consciousness as you felt yourself leaning against James, while he tried his best to get you through the dark, dirty passage. Then, before you reached the light of the moon again, you blacked out.

He had decided years ago, his purpose to protect you was greater than his pain.

Now Sirius sat on the marble bench outside the infirmary. All he ever wanted was to protect to you, and he failed miserably. Deep, dark circles from lost sleep were seen under his matt eyes. It had been almost two days since the incident and he had not the slightest idea, how James had explained the entire situation. Madame Pomfrey sure had enough to do as he carried you in, in the middle of the night with blood dripping on the way. They were able to stop the bleeding fairly quickly, but your body needed a lot of energy to fully close the wounds. As steps approached, Sirius looked up to find Remus; he looked just as tired.

He had lost all memory of the night, but seeing you pale and injured, hit him hard. He probably hadn´t slept as well. “She´s not awake?”

Sirius didn´t answer, his sole presence was enough. On the other hand, he wasn´t sure if he could even face you.

“Lilly´s with her.”

McGonagall’s lecture was hard, but bearable. Lilly´s on the other hand, only created more remorse. She was right, if he had just told the truth, things would´ve been different, under control at least. A deep empty pit inside his stomach growled as blame remained. But the heaping pain in his heart was even worse. The image of you in the hospital bed had been like a trigger, that created an avalanche. It could´ve ended worse, he could´ve lost you.

Sirius felt like throwing up again as the thought crossed his mind. It was his biggest fear; losing you.

“Amortentia is the most powerful love potion in the world. It is distinctive for its mother-of-pearl sheen, and steam rises from the potion in spirals. Amortentia smells different to each person, according to what attracts them."

“What in Merlin´s beard are you reading to me?”

Lilly´s head snapped up from the potions book, she couldn´t help herself but feel the need to entertain you. And maybe herself as well, while she held watch at your side.

“You´re up!” The red-head exclaimed excited and sat down on the bed next to you.

“How are you feeling?”

You let a small groan as you sat up a little higher, your limbs felt weak and heavy.

“Tired”, you offered her a small smile.

Your eyes traveled down to the bandages on your arms.

“Glad to see you didn´t amputate them.”

“At least you didn´t lose your humor.”

Then you found Lilly´s gaze again. “What about Sirius and Remus?”

She quickly shook her head. “You left us all worried and with terrible remorse, but we all survived, more or less.” You raised your eyebrow at her, questioning, but she ignored your gesture.

“I´ll just get them.”

Only seconds after, you heard steps approaching again. From behind the curtain came two terribly exhausting looking boys; your boys.

“You both look like shit”, you couldn´t hold back the comment and the three of you erupted in easier laughter. The tensions slightly shrunk. Remus was first to sit down next to you, guilt still hidden behind his eyes. But before he could even speak up, you shook your head.

“Don´t. It´s not your fault, you weren´t you.”

He offered you an apologetic smile.

“If I had told you the truth, or at least allowed Sirius to do so, this wouldn´t have happened.”

“Yeah”, you agreed nodding. “Better to remember for next time.”

Remus grimaced, still eyeing the bandages on your arms. “I hope there won´t be a next time like this.”

“If it helps, I barely remember getting here.”

Remus stayed still, but you carefully grabbed his hand. “Remus, I´m fine. Don´t beat yourself up about it, I forgive you.”

Finally, he looked up as well, nodding with tears in his eyes. It was a huge relief that he felt dropping off his shoulders. He gave you a careful hug. “I think I should give you some more rest, and don´t worry, I´ve been doing all your homework!”

Playfully, you hit his shoulder. “You should´ve started with that apology!”

Remus nodded at his friend as he left your side again, but Sirius remained standing next to your bed. You rose your eyebrow at him. “What´s wrong, Black?”

“Nothing´s wrong, you´re back and healing. It´s all that matters.”

“Something´s clearly wrong.”

Sirius pinched the bridge of his nose; it took all his strength not to break down. “We could´ve lost you.” He paused.

“I could´ve lost you.”

“But you didn´t”, you wanted to argue, but Sirius turned his back to you. Nervously wandering up and down in the room.

“I should´ve protected you better”, he mumbled quietly, his hand roughly running through his messy hair.

“That´s not your job-“

“Yes, it is. I can´t take seeing you hurt. So, I need to protect you!” His voice became louder, almost sounding angry. But beneath the façade was angst and deep distress.

“No, it´s not! Your job is to be my friend, not my patronus! You shouldn´t have to hide something like this!”

Suddenly he stopped, his back still facing you and his hands forming fists. You saw how his shoulders rose and dropped from his heavy breathing.

“Maybe, if I can´t protect you as a friend, we can´t be friends.”

His voice was low and so quiet, you weren´t sure at first about the words escaping his mouth. You felt your heart drop at his sentence, a gasp coming from your lips. Your mouth opened, but no words came out and you watched as Sirius pulled the curtain back, leaving the infirmary.

No, you wouldn´t let this go. Not like this.

You threw back the blanket and your bare feet touched the cold ground. You didn´t care though, or about the thin layer of white linen covering your body.

Just outside the infirmary, you caught up to him.

“Maybe we can´t be friends!”

He stopped once again, not bearing the thought of turning to look at you directly. He felt tears forming and he didn´t want you to see him like this. Weak and vulnerable, unable to protect you.

“And you can´t protect me from everything, especially not heartbreak! Because, you, you Sirius Black are breaking my heart!”

Carefully and slowly, he turned towards you, his eyes still glued on the floor. Your voice was quaking and your entire body shaking.

“You were never just a friend to me!”

Swift, in a blink, Sirius was right in front of you, his hands cupping your face. Only inches were left and you felt his warmth breath on your skin.

“I never wanted to break your heart, all I wanted was not to lose you”, he whispered with his voice shaking as well.

“You didn´t lose me and you never will.”

Then you felt his lips on yours and you eased into the kiss. His touch felt welcoming and you inhaled his musky scent. You had been right, no one was able to stop you from falling for your best friend. But after all, you didn´t need protection; all you needed were your friends and your love.

#sirius black oneshot #sirius black x reader #sirius black imagine #sirius x reader #Sirius Black #ben barnes #harry potter imagine #marauder imagine #mariamermaidimagine

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lady-charinette · 3 years

Note

Can you do a reader insert for Ranmaru from Kakuriyo? Maybe a human brought to Orio-ya by Ougan douji to turn the old building into a restaurant and he's surprised that it's become so popular?

“That woman…” Ranmaru adjusted his position against one of the wooden beams supporting Orio-ya, hands crossed over his chest at the sight before him.

Ayakashi bustling about, Orio-ya’s staff cleaning and guiding customers to their seats and in the center of all the controlled chaos was one woman.

One human woman.

Mistress Ougon-douji had brought you into Orio-ya, there had been no doubt in Ranmaru’s mind where she found you.

Ever since Aoi and subsequently Tenjin’ya had visited their inn, life as they knew it began to change.

Ayakashi from far and wide visited their inn, intrigued by the knowledge of the temporary reunion between the two most popular inns, as well as Tenjin’ya’s resident human having been an esteemed guest. “Esteemed” might not have been the word Ranmaru would’ve used since the beginning of Aoi’s stay here, but that had certainly changed with time. Now that peace existed between the two inns, even Ginji visited more often.

And today was one of those days.

“There you are Ranmaru! The restaurant sure seems to be successful, its almost as popular as Aoi’s back at Tenjin’ya! What’re you doing here standing all alone? Huh?” the nine tailed fox followed the dog ayakashi’s line of sight and spotted you who’d transformed the old, unused section of their inn into a lively restaurant. A devious smile spread the sly fox’s lips, “Ah, I recognize that look.”

Ranmaru bristled, hair standing on end and tail hitting Ginji completely intentionally, “What are you talking about?” he barked, pushing himself off the beam and moving onto a different less populated area.

He didn’t notice your curious gaze staring at his back as he rounded the corner.

Ginji, of course, followed suit. “You look just like the Master whenever he looks at Aoi! They make quiet a couple, you know?” Ginji switched sides and moved to Ranmaru’s right, just in time to avoid the violent arm swinging at the spot he had previously been in.

“Nonsense! Maybe the sake got to you Ginji, you’ve never been a good drinker.” Ginji allowed the remark to slide, watching his childhood friend stomp his way towards the general direction of the receptionist desk.

He scoffed, a lopsided smile on his lips. “I haven’t, but you’ve never been a good liar, Ranmaru.” With a shake of his head, Ginji made his way back to the festivities, making his way towards you to ask if you needed help with anything.

It was late when the restaurant in Orio-ya closed, you were kindly helping customers up to their feet and back into the inn, their steps heavy and uneven as the sake still buzzed in their bodies.

Your back hurt from all the preparations made for the restaurant, at least you didn’t have to cook everything on your own, the talented chefs of Orio-ya had been more than welcome to help you out.

“Of course, you’re now a part of Orio-ya, we help each-other here.” You appreciated how attentive everyone seemed to you, willing to help you adjust in the Hidden Realm among ayakashi as a sole human.

Well, almost.

There was always Aoi, who had been a tremendous help in getting you back on your feet and making sure you were protected and could hold your own against ayakashi. Tenjin’ya’s master had been kind enough to recommend you to the mistress of Orio-ya for hired help, since they were short staffed and needed fresh ideas to get their inn back on track.

You were more than alright with that, you missed leading your own restaurant back at home, and since you didn’t have the same abilities as the ayakashi, you thought it might be best to stick to what you knew and help them out.

As it turned out, Orio-ya had accepted you fairly quickly. Apparently, Aoi had humbled them quite a bit, some staff members were a bit brutish towards you for being human, but for the most part you felt perfectly safe.

That was largely thanks to Orio-ya’s lead manager, Ranmaru. Having not met a dog ayakashi before, you had been pretty taken with him, especially due to his big mane and his fluffy tail. Not to mention those ears.

Unfortunately, he acted anything but like a dog.

He seemed to be more of a cat than a dog, at least like the animals in your world.

He would mostly avoid you if he could, slipping past you whenever he could, only appearing when it suited him. But you weren’t stupid, you felt his gaze whenever you ventured outside of the inn, taking a walk through the forest. You were warned not to venture too far away, for the possibility of encountering monsters or unfriendly ayakashi but so far, nothing happened to you.

You thought it might’ve something to do with the dog ayakashi always being somewhere in your vicinity. Far away enough he thought you wouldn’t notice, but close enough to keep an eye on you.

Hideyoshi once corrected you on Ranmaru being a komainu, a lion-dog ayakashi, not purely a dog ayakashi. When you asked what the difference was, Hideyoshi had been curiously tongue tied, just snapping at you to never treat him like a lowly dog from your world.

You’d felt mildly offended, what was wrong with dogs? They were cute and fluffy and very loyal companions. So far, Ranmaru didn’t seem to really fit her world dog’s description.

Well…he was fluffy. At least judging from his hair and tail.

And he was cute or at least as cute as you were willing to admit to yourself.

You did know he was loyal to Orio-ya and its inhabitants but you didn’t think that same loyalty extended to you yet..or if ever.

Ranmaru didn’t seem to like you very much, no matter how hard you worked at befriending him and getting on his good side. It just seemed like he put walls all around him to keep you as far away from him as possible.

Your troubled musings were interrupted when something hit the ground with a dull thud.

It was Ranmaru.

The komainu had set up a table near the edge of Orio-ya’s porch, overlooking the sea. A bottle of sake and two bowls were on the table.

He didn’t even look at you when he spoke, his voice low and uncharacteristically lacking the typical bite which he usually barked commands at you, “Sit.”

Debating whether or not to tell him you weren’t his servant nor a dog, you took a deep breath and decided to follow his lead. This had been his first direct attempt at engaging in conversation with you, at least conversation that so far didn’t have anything to do with Orio-ya or the restaurant.

You sat on the opposite side of him, your gaze straying to the beautiful night sky before your head whipped around at the sound of trickling liquid.

Ranmaru was pouring you sake.

Finally, his gaze briefly met your stunned one, scoffing at the bewildered look on your face. “You seem surprised,” he nudged the bowl of sake towards you, before moving to pour himself a cup.

This time, it was him that was stunned when your hands landed on his, gently taking the sake bottle from him. He seemed even more stunned when you poured him sake, “Can you blame me? This is the first time you tried to talk to me and didn’t just watch me from afar.”

The komainu seemed oddly flustered, whether at being caught red-handed or that you were aware of his guarded gazes.

He cleared his throat, choosing not to comment and taking a sip from his sake. You did the same.

You drank together quietly, at the now clean porch of Orio-ya, both staring up at the night sky littered with stars and the moon.

Perhaps it was the fatigue hitting you from working a full day at Orio-ya with the newly opened restaurant, or the alcohol in your system, but you felt compelled to utter the words that left your mouth, “You know, ever since coming here, I’ve been scared what would become of me. If I would survive in this world, or if I would ever find a way to go back to mine. Since I met Aoi and saw how happy she was here, I’m beginning to think that…maybe its alright if I don’t return to my world.” You stared down at the clear liquid in your bowl, watching the moon’s reflection staring back at your pensive face.

Ranmaru was listening intently, trying to find the right words to answer you. It seemed like the bowl of sake gave him the inspiration, or the confidence, to finally speak. “You’ve been adjusting rather well here, despite all your…shortcomings.”

You huffed in annoyance at his remark, turning your head away from him.

A low chuckle filled your ears and his voice followed, “I think you’ll live here just fine, as long as you stay at Orio-ya, that is.”

You looked back at him in surprise, blinking rapidly. “You…you want me to…stay?”

The ghost of a smile adorned the komainu’s handsome face. “You’ve opened up this restaurant, someone has to lead it.” He lifted his bowl to his lips, blue eyes swimming with unspoken thoughts. “And…some of Orio-ya’s staff seemed to have…developed a soft spot for you.”

You weren’t sure if this was the sake talking or not, but you found yourself mirroring his stance, your voice soft when you said, “Well…I…developed a soft spot for…them too.” You could feel your cheeks heating up but blamed it on the alcohol.

The stars seemed to wink down at you, so mesmerized were you at their beauty that you failed to catch Ranmaru’s gentle smile.

Thanks for reading! It’s been a long while since I wrote for the fandom, so I hope it’s not too OOC and that you liked it :3

#kakuriyo no yadomeshi #bed and breakfast for spirits #ranmaru x reader #kakuriyo bed and breakfast for spirits #my fic #my fics #ask #Thanks for the request!#kakuriyo fic #kakuriyo fanfic

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ashbrea381writings · 3 years

Text

Fractals and Feathers: Chapter two, Information

“Colored cracks may appear in cases where a soulmate dies and is subsequently resuscitated.” Tim quoted as he sat back from the computer. “This happens frequently with heart patients and those in bad motor accidents.”

“Yes, but these are a lot of them… And they’re gold.” Damian commented with a sigh. “And Kent has mostly gold with a few red ones. It shouldn’t be possible for someone to die and be resuscitated that many times!” He began pacing around behind Tim, muttering. “There must be some kind of magic involved here, perhaps Mother is behind this, Grandfather always hated my wings, it could be some sort of magic they’re using to try and make me think my soulmate is dead, but it didn’t work right.”

“Baby Bird, that doesn’t explain Jon’s wings.” Dick commented as he walked in, removing his mask and wiping some sweat from his forehead. “Besides, I did some recon too, it seems like a few people who’s soulmates are in Paris have experienced the same thing. When they called their soulmates in a panic over the cracks that had appeared, they were told that there is a new set of Supers in Paris. And one of them has the power to reverse all the damage done by the Villain… Including death.”

Tim gave a groan, typing furiously as he tried to get past the firewall that kept rewriting itself. “I can’t get any info out of Paris. I even set my VPN to and address in Paris, but it somehow keeps blocking me.” He growled in frustration as a window opened on the screen previously just covered with code, showing a young woman with dark, blue-black hair in a high ponytail and a red and black mask over eyes that practically glowed blue.

“Will you stop that?!” She snarled in heavily accented English. “I don’t care who you are, but you need to keep your noses out of our business.”

Thankfully, Tim and Damian were still masked up, and Dick was able to turn around before the video fully opened. “We work with the Justice League, if people are dying repeatedly and are only brought back by magic it IS our business.” Nightwing responded in his best Batman impression as he turned around with his mask back in place. “I’m assuming that would be you who does this?”

“Yes, it is, and I would appreciate it if you and your superpowered friends stayed away from my city.” She seemed to set whatever the camera was attached to on a ledge, showing a stunning view of Paris behind her. “We have it handled here and we don’t need any of your friends making our jobs harder.”

“Isn’t your job to protect the citizens of Paris?!” Robin growled, stalking up to the screen and glaring behind his mask. “Yet somehow, those who we know have soulmates in Paris are suffering with the knowledge that their soulmates keep dying only to be brought back by some magic that might just stop working one day!”

“I don’t get a choice.” She responded, crossing her arms. “Hawkmoth won’t stop until he gets what he wants and I don’t feel like letting the world potentially end, thank you. We are working on his identity, but it’s difficult with the magics involved-such as the one that alerted me to your intrusion and prevents you from finding what you want.”

“And how are we supposed to trust you?” Red Robin asked, almost too casually for Robin’s preference, if the way his shoulders stiffened was any indication. “See, we have a couple people we know personally whose wings are covered in gold and red fractal patterns, and we’re awfully worried about people who have to sacrifice themselves that much. Especially since it obviously sticks long enough to make a mark, AND they all showed up within the last couple of weeks.”

“One of my team members is able to rewind time for a maximum of 5 minutes at a time, this allows the possibility of thousands of different aborted timelines, hence why the lines might show up multiple at a time. Because they might have died in a couple dozen of the timelines before we finally had a solution.” She sighed and pinched her nose. “We are up against a madman with a magic item that allows him to use negative emotions against us and make his victims do the dirty work for him.”

“Dirty work? What kind of dirty work?” Nightwing asked, frowning and crossing his arms in turn. “What does he want, exactly? And how does that potentially end the world?”

“He wants the magic items that myself and my partner use. The ones our team uses and that Hawkmoth and his partner use are from a set of them, I won’t tell you how many. Each has a different power, and the one’s my partner and I use happen to be the two most powerful, using the power of creation…” She paused and gestured to herself, glancing off screen for a moment. “And destruction, respectively.” She stepped to one side to reveal a young man in armored leather with cat ears on his head.

“When you combine them, you are able to make a wish. Would you trust the man who is willing to destroy Paris with such a wish?” The young man asked, his black and acid green wings flaring out as though in a threat display. “Or being able to use someone like Superman as a weapon?”

“How would that be possible?” Nightwing asked, “Also, since we will apparently be having a longer conversation than I expected, I’m Nightwing. These are Robin and Red Robin.” He added, pointing to them. “We would like to offer aid if we can, even from a distance if we needed to. I’m assuming that since you could connect to our computer with the magic you’re using, you could also exempt it from the magic.”

“That’s a bold assumption. I’m Ladybug, and this is my partner Chat Noir. While I could let you guys have an exception, I’m afraid I don’t see why I should trust you.” Her wings were also bristling, the red-and-black spots clearly caused by the magic they used just as Chat’s coloration obviously wasn’t natural.

“We are known for being detectives above all else. We don’t have powers, and one or two of us are even mentally well-adjusted enough that we could probably come to you guys without risking whatever happens with your villain.” Nightwing insisted.

“How about we come to you? Give us a place to meet with you in your city, we have a way to transport ourselves. I’d like to size you up before I give you any more information.” Ladybug countered, moving her hands to her hips. “I don’t trust that you’re nearly as well adjusted as you claim, I’m one of the most positive people on the face of the earth and even I have had to force myself out of mindsets that nearly got me Akumatized. It’s not as easy to avoid as you think.”

“What was that word? Akumatized?” Red Robin asked, frowning as he tried and failed to translate the word.

“It’s what we call it when someone has been taken over by Hawkmoth. He sends out a butterfly corrupted by magic and turns normal people into a villain. Once the Akuma -the butterfly- is purified the victim does not remember any of what happened while they were Akumatized.” The Bug and Cat pair exchanged a glance, making frustrated faces at each other.

“What was that look?” Robin asked, still angry that they weren’t giving him what he wanted. “The look you two had just now?”

“We… We’ll tell you after we decide if we want help from you.” Ladybug sighed. “I’ve added a way for you to message me on my device I’m using to talk to you, it’ll show up as an app on your computer. Don’t use it for trivial matters or I’ll just lock you out. Give me a time and place to meet, using my timezone preferably, and I will do my best to have both me and Chat be there to discuss matters further.” With those last, brisk words, Ladybug reached for her device and cut the call.

“Well, that was rude.” Red Robin huffed, picking up his phone to show Batman’s face in a video call there. “Did you hear all that, B?”

“I heard. Send coordinates for the top of Wayne Enterprises, for 9:00 pm Paris time tomorrow.” He instructed, sighing from his seat in the Batmobile. “We will all meet them there, let her know that myself and the three of you will be there.”

“Copy that, B. Sending the information now.” The young man typed quickly, double-checking what time that would be for them. “That’s the middle of the afternoon, are you sure?”

“Yeah, nobody has anything scheduled for tomorrow, and she sounded about the same age as Robin. With all that considered, I don’t know if they DO have civilian plans early the next day, so I’d rather err towards them having more time to sleep.”

Reading the return message, Red Robin began to chuckle. “They want to meet us at 4am Paris Time, as they already get up that early to do other things and missing half an hour or so wouldn’t be an issue.”

“Very well, if that’s part of their routine, we can handle that.” Batman answered, seeming interested to know what the heck had them up that early.

#mgi trope tussle #maribat #daminette #dc #miraculous ladybug #wing au #soulmate

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thefanficmonster · 3 years

Text

Never Satisfied [Chapter 6]

Corpse Husband x Original Female Character

Warnings: Language

A collaboration between Vy & Ashens 🖤

“I don’t wanna look like this, fuck”

Previously on Never Satisfied:

Digital Checkpoint activated. Reply to save progress. 💜 — Cora

With minimal contemplation he replies seconds later.

Corpse: save

Cora: your progress has been saved. Thank you for choosing A.S.S. - the Automated Save System. You are now free to activate the digital checkpoint at any time.

Cora: I had a nice time. Text me whenever you need to. We’ll hang out again soon, deal?

Corpse: thank you

Cora: anytime sugar ;)

Funny how a text exchange so simple and short can turn so much around for a person. Funny how a huge weight lifts off him the second he locks his phone, suddenly finding it easier to breathe, to move, to blink, to function - to live. She gives him that kick he needs to be reminded to live and not just be alive. He’s still not comfortable with how much he’s relying on her but seeing her effect on him is nothing but positive, the most and best thing he can do for himself is go with the flow and let things happen. No overthinking, no planning, no shooting guesses, just facing things as they come face-to-face with him. He may never get used to it, but he won’t know that until he tries, will he?

* * *

Corpse sighs as he looks at himself in the mirror. He’s been trying to step up a little with the dressing game since he’ll be having a special guest over - ok, truth be told, he didn’t invite her, she invited herself but he’s glad she did. Lord knows he wants her company and wants her around but he could never bring himself to invite her over or initiate a hangout. Good thing Cora doesn’t expect anything from him, not of that nature at least. It’s oddly amazing having a person like her - someone who basically reads his mind like an open book and then takes action according to what she’s read. It’s not only the fact that she accurately gauges all his wants and needs, but also how she knows exactly what to do to satisfy them. To calm him down, to relieve his anxiety, to make him feel comfortable. He feels strangely selfish for always being on the receiving end of this friendship, although he doesn’t see much he could do for her. He’s decided to let time have full control of the course of their relationship, hoping his giver time would come soon.

As of now, however, it still hasn’t and he can stomach that.

It’s been about a week and a half since their first hangout but he hasn’t missed her once. That may be due to how much they’ve been texting ever since he unlocked that checkpoint she offered him. To be more specific, it probably has something to do with the fact that her texts are always so full of life and light, sounding almost like she’s there with him, talking in her signature upbeat and bubbly way which is such a contrast to his own melancholic approach to any conversation ever.

She’s also sent him a ton of memes and selfies, plus pictures she took of clients’ pets. In return for her kindness, he’s sent her bad jokes, weird internet articles about ghosts and pictures of the current game he was playing. Needless to say, their chats have been very colorful.

Now that the scene has been set up a little better, a direct timeline of events lading up to this one would be appreciated, wouldn’t it? Ok so, it all started with an “I’m bored” text Corpse received from Cora about two hours ago. Instinctively, and partially because he didn’t have any idea what else he could possibly say in response to that he sent back an apology. An apology Cora apparently deemed a loophole she could use to invite herself over cause that’s exactly what she did, not that Corpse minds it much. In fact, he felt his heartbeat quicken with excitement when her “K then, I’ll be there in a bit :)” text came in. At first he thought it was his anxiety kicking in but when he realized the rest of his typical symptoms remained absent it took him a little while to pinpoint what that emotion could be.

The epiphany came in the form of the word ‘excitement’.

Regardless of the newfound feeling, or maybe exactly because of it, he attempted to protest. A protest she killed easily with a threatening “I know where you live” text which sent Corpse scrambling to get the apartment in some kind of order. Himself too, it’s safe to say he wasn’t looking the most presentable when he received that message.

His cleaning session consisted mostly of him shoving the strewn about items in his closet and closing it shut like a wild beast dwelled inside, placing a chair in front of the door as a sign for her not to open it and also as a way of preventing the thing from opening on its own because of how overflowing it was.

Afterwards he scrambled into the shower to scrub himself down. It’d been too much for him to tackle given he wasn’t doing too well mentally, but considering he was now suddenly expecting company he thought it’d be for the best not to subject his new friend to the three-day-unshowered Corpse stank.

Right now, his main focus is his face, his stomach sinking at the sight of himself in the mirror’s reflection.

How does she even want to see me?

His mirror is cracked along the right side, spider web-like cracks reaching towards the center of it from the impact point serving as a reminder of a particularly bad night he’d rather forget.

He sighs as he combs his hair, knowing the dark curls won’t oblige and behave no matter how much he tries. He touches his jaw, deciding to let himself off the hook by deeming that a shave wouldn’t be necessary for at least another day. And then his eyes land on his clothes - an outfit it didn’t take him long to put together since those are the only articles of clothing in his closet he’d consider presentable enough to be shown off in front of a new friend who is yet to find out how much of a slob he really is. That clothing choice consists of a black button-up shirt and jeans.

This is nice, right? It’s fine. It’s business casual but definitely leaning more towards casual, as some would say. I look...nice, decent. I’ll take it - it’s enough. Far better than my ‘usual’.

A knock at the door startles him, though it’s quickly followed by a voice he’s grown to find very endearing:

“THIS IS THE COPPAS! OPEN UP YA’ DOOR!” The voice yells out, probably loud enough for the whole complex to hear but it’s not like he gives a shit. And, as context clues show, neither does she.

Corpse exits his bathroom, heading for the front door, pulling the chain off and unlocking the deadbolt before opening it. The object of his newfound affection stands on the other side, grinning and beaming with that usual light she has surrounding her. Her hair is thrown up into a messy bun - a hairstyle she seems to love - and she’s wearing a simple red t-shirt covered in little chubby, cartoonish black cats that seem to be struggling to exist.

He smiles a little, finding it in himself to speak up but when he opens his mouth to do so, she cuts him off.

“Jesus, did you just come back from a funeral?” She asks, pulling at one of the buttons on his chest as she walks past him, letting herself in.

His eyes, completely on their own accord, wander down as she walks on by, causing him to swallow hard as he finds himself staring at a pair of tanned legs, patterned by the fishnets she’s wearing, leading up to a pair of short black shorts.

She turns on her heel about halfway down the hall, leading him to take an inevitable notice of how her well-loved boots could use a polish. Anyhow, he snaps his gaze away to hide the fact he’s been gawking, despite not really meaning to.

“No, but for real, why are you wearing that? You seem super confined and uncomfy, bud.”

Corpse blinks before swallowing and glancing down at himself, pulling at the button she touched before looking back up, his gaze traveling up the length of her legs. She has suspenders hanging over her thighs, more of an accessory than a necessary addition to her outfit. “I just...I dunno, I thought it looked nice. Does it not? I mean, I wouldn’t know, really. I don’t usually dress like this.”

“I mean, you look dapper as fuck but if you’re not comfortable then change, get your comfy game on. I’m the last person you need to impress in this world.”

God, she sees right through him. Even so, he considers protesting, trying to convince it’s all fine, that he likes this shirt and the outfit in its entirety. But her stare sets the record straight for him - she’ll know it’s all lies. And with that in mind, he lets his shoulders fall. Not a full second passes before he promptly starts undoing his buttons.

“Oh, thank fuck.” She comments as he goes to retreat into his room, stripping the shirt off as he walks, unaware of her lingering eyes on his back, unaware of her lower lip bitten between her pearly teeth. Unaware of the subtle shift in her stance as she looks him over much like he did her moments earlier.

When he returns a moment later in a simple dark grey t-shirt, she greets him with a grin and pats his chest. “Much better.”

It doesn’t take long for them to decide to crash on his couch, throw on a bad movie and just sit in comfortable silence. Comfortable silence - something that usually eats away at him and is anything but comfortable he now sees as calming, a soothe to his ever-racing mind.

Disrespecting the movie, Corpse takes to analyzing his guest instead. She has so much confidence, he can’t help but notice, like she’s been here hundreds of times, known him for so long. He hates her a little for it. Well, it’s not quite hate, it leans more toward envy. Jealousy. That human-nature characteristic of wanting what someone else has but you desperately need/wish you had. In his mind, she’s almost selfish: Why couldn’t she share some of that confidence and carefree manner with the rest of the world? It oozes out of her like a drip of honey from a beehive, sweet and warm. And all he wants yet has none of.

He instinctively tenses up as he feels her move closer before, suddenly, her head drops into his lap, legs kicked over the armrest of the couch. He holds his breath almost subconsciously, staring at her as she remains focused on the television. Unsure of what to do with his hands, he puts one across the back of the couch and the other awkwardly bent above his head. He doesn’t want her to get the wrong idea if he touches her. He doesn’t want to come off as a creep nor does he want to overstep any of her boundaries, despite the fact she’s walking a dangerous line of overstepping his. Well, that would’ve been the case if this was done by anyone but her. The way Corpse comes to this realization is when he figures out that he really doesn’t mind this proximity, as long as he doesn’t embarrass himself or creep her out in any way.

What felt like an eternity passes before she finally speaks up, still without looking away from the movie playing on the screen opposite the couch, “You know, I can feel how tense you are.”

His face flushes with embarrassment, heating up as his mind immediately goes to the worst possible outcome of this situation.

She’ll probably sit up, or leave, he thinks to himself, heart thumping in his ears as he tries to observe her face the best he can from this angle. Nevertheless, he swallows that fear as she rolls her head to look up at him with those large glittering doe eyes, grinning a bit as she seems to always do, “You can just put your hands wherever it’s comfortable for you. I don’t mind.”

He hesitates for a moment but, as always, he doesn’t get much say cause she makes the choice for him, knowing that pesky fear is keeping him immobile. She takes the hand from over his head and pulls it down to rest just next to her skull. She then drags the one resting at the back of the couch, placing it so his hand is resting dead-center on her stomach. Satisfied with how she’s rearranged his posture, she goes back to watching the movie but not before asking: “This okay?” while looking at him through her peripheral vision.

He’d have to admit it’s far more comfortable like this.

“Yeah, it’s fine. You’re okay?” He asks, feeling relieved when he feels her nod against his leg.

He moves his hand a little and swallows hard as he contemplates if he really should make the move he’s thinking of at the moment. And then he abruptly decides not to think. So, instead, he acts on it.

Without thinking of any potential negative consequences, Corpse slides his fingers to lace with hers, resting their conjoined hands on her stomach in the same spot where she left his hand a bit ago. She curls her digits around his tighter as reassurance that it’s ok. Her palm feels warm in his hand, her thumb tracing his cold metal rings.

Checkpoint...his checkpoint.

Is this what it feels like to be normal?, he wonders, Is this what it feels like to really connect with someone? He has never felt this before. He’s never met someone who has such an effect on him, understand him like this - Without even having to ask she grounded him; she knew what he needed and didn’t make him feel like an idiot about it. Instead she gave him the comfort he needed.

And suddenly he finds himself afraid - realizing that this isn’t simply a vibe of two buddies hanging out. He has that subtle ache in his chest that’s telling him he wants something…something substantial from this friendship. He wants this to last, or for it to blossom, he’s not sure yet. But for the first time, he doesn’t feel the overwhelming need to figure it out. That’s one of the many effects this girl has on him - she’s the definition of improvisation, unpredictable and alive. He’s slowly learning to let loose himself, all thanks to her. Slowly, he’s learning to trust time.

He abruptly realizes he’s glancing at her often as the movie is still running, examining her features and slowly running his gaze down the length of her fishnet-clad thighs before quickly looking away, mentally scolding himself. It’s hard, but he manages to turn his gaze elsewhere for his sake and hers. For the sake of keeping things normal, platonic and not in any way awkward for either of them. The last thing he needs is to make things weird by letting his mind wander and activate his libido and then she’d really notice how tense he is.

Cora remains oblivious to what’s going on in his head, thank God, as she continues running her thumb across his knuckles, eyes half lidded in calm content - something that’d typically seem like the complete opposite of what she is. He likes seeing her like this, tamed almost. He feels like no one else has had the privilege to see this calm side of her. Maybe that’s not the truth - it probably isn’t - but he still feels special, knowing that it’s a tight circle of people who have seen her this way.

And then he realizes the movements of her thumb on his hand have stopped.

He freezes for a moment, his fearful gaze travelling to her face where he’s relieved to find her eyes closed only seconds before he hears a light snore escape her.

She’s fallen asleep.

It’s an odd scene. She’s such a wild and free spirit, seeing her fall asleep like this is like observing an abnormality, a paranormal event. You know, like something one doesn’t usually believe exists or is capable of happening. He’d never before been able to imagine her asleep. It’s ridiculous, he’s aware - she’s human after all, but his mind has never been able to comprehend the thought and image of her captured by the power of sleep. He simply couldn’t see it happening. But now that it’s happened in front of him, he can’t look away from the sight of her relaxed, peaceful features, overcome by sudden slumber.

And then he comes to the realization that he’s now practically held hostage on his own couch, crippled by the danger of waking her up. It’s gonna be a long while, isn’t it, he thinks to himself, yet there’s still a satisfied smile on his face. A smile that’s a result of knowing he’s held hostage by her. That’s more a blessing than a curse, if he’s being honest.

@fockingwhore @vixenl @annshit @wineandionysus @wiseflamingoqueen

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