#peter just walked in

[marvel-lous-guy]

Tony: who would you say is the most innocent out of us?

Harley: Peter.

Tony: really? Not Capsicle?

Steve: Come on, Tony! It was one time!

Harley: watch this. Hey Peter! What's first base?

Peter: hand holding

Harley: and second base?

Peter: running your hand through their hair

Harley: and third base?

Peter: them seeing you have a panic attack

Tony: yeah, okay, this kid is too innocent for his own good

Clint: I'm gonna tell him

Tony: *repulsers on his hands* DON'T YOU DARE!

#Now Tony and Clint are wrestling on the floor #Pietro is filming it #They forgot what they are fighting about #Nat is cheering clint on #harley is cheering Tony on #its all a huge mess #but a funny one #peter just walked in #he is so confused #marvel #marvel cinematic universe #peter parker #tony stark #steve rogers #clint barton #incorrect mcu quotes #incorrect mcu #marvel incorrect quotes #incorrect quotes #incorrect peter parker #mcu

[thejagermeister]

i have an extremely stupid headcanon that every time max went to beat up pete, he asked where his insulin pump was. solely because one time max hit it by accident and pete started crying about how if it broke, he couldn't afford to replace it. so max asked how much it cost for one of those things anyway, pete could definitely afford it since he was so rich. then pete told him and max said "five fucking thousand dollars??? dude i'll just punch you somewhere else. jesus christ."

#alternate scenario where pete sees max walking down the hallway #and just. sighs and unclips his pump and puts it away #nerdy prudes must die #npmd #peter spankoffski #max jagerman #hatchetfield #starkid

[fishwithoneeye]

Hopefully this hasn’t been made before but here’s another gift for you, Saw Tumblr community

#saw #saw franchise #saw memes #sawposting #coffinshipping #peter strahm #mark hoffman #jigsaw #fun fact I recently saw a man who looked a lot like Hoffman and he was walking two tiny dogs #I tried to smile at him to acknowledge the dogs but it was really awkward because #the entire time he just looked dead-serious #saw v #saw iv #saw vi #fishposting #hoffstrahm

[avocadoraisin]

I am not immune to mermay

#putting the toxic in toxic yaoi #im on an AU kick #walk with me here.. sharks are strong and appear scary but are ultimately just doing their job #lionfish are pretty but highly invasive and dangerous #saw #coffinshipping #hoffstrahm #mark hoffman #peter strahm #it hurt me drawing them so... smooth.. #drawing #saw fanart #saw au

[redkelpfish]

I had a vision

#she’s been haunting me since I walked out of that movie but I’ve only just gotten around to doing anything about it #don’t worry I’m a firm ‘peter porker would have hit miguel with a comically large hammer’ truther but this is for the bit #spider verse #spider noir #spider ham #peter porker #across the spider verse #atsv #spider man #art #(​if we find out in pt. 2 that these two were in that chase I’m flipping a table)

[foolsocracy]

omg ally

#idk what’s going on in the background but IDGAF!!! 🍾🥳 #I amuse myself #also ofc aunt May loves gay ppl this was just for the joke #my art #peter benjamin parker #spider noir #spider man noir #marvel #robbie robertson #also the cafteria Robbie mentions was a gay spot in the 1930s lol #like in real life #in greenwich village which is close enough to the Bowery am I right #they can walk a few blocks that all I’m saying #who remebers when I posted those first 2 pics like 8 months ago #tumblr if u crunch these pictures I’m killing myself

[fotibrit]

Cant stop thinking about Tony Stark watching Peter Parker walk away from the Avengers job offer, torn between jealousy that Peter had that option and delight that he took that option.

That was the moment Tony Stark knew this kid would end up better than the rest of them combined.

#tony stark #iron man #marvel fandom #marvel mcu #peter parker #spider man #irondad and spiderson #iron dad #the expression on tony’s face is just #he never got that option #he never could just walk away #foti canon observation

[cult-of-the-eye]

Praying to Martin K Blackwood to one day have as much audacity as he does

#falling in love with his boss??? #walking around with only boxers??? #lying on his CV??? #the persona of oh im so incompetent i just make tea hiding his actual bitchy self???? #manipulating peter lukas???? #loving highland cows???? #delicious character #10/10 #tma #the magnus archives #martin k blackwood #martin blackwood

[idk-bruh-20]

Irondad fic ideas #133

Morgan Stark discovers the joke format, "__, __, and __ walk into a bar..." 

She doesn't quite get the concept, but she enjoys it. And, like most children, when she enjoys something she becomes absolutely obsessed with it.

Morgan: A spider, the spider's aunt, and a grumpy walk into the house!

Happy: Morgan that's not how that works

Peter: I dunno, you do seem more like a Grumpy than a Happy :)

---

Morgan: A princess, her bestest brother ever, and their cyborg chef walk into the kitchen.

Tony: You can just say you want pancakes, Mo.

Peter, tearing up: That's Princess Mo to you.

---

Bonus:

It becomes an inside joke that the whole family uses. 

Tony when Peter cuts off his coffee supply: (gasp) A genius, his robot minions, and a hater walk into the lab.

Peter, not even missing a beat: A genius, his son, and his robot children who agree with the son walk out of the lab and in to their beds.

Tony, so completely endeared every time Peter calls himself his son he can barely protest: I- I- now wait just a second...

---

Teen Morgan, upon finding her brother and MJ making out on the couch: Eughh! An intern, the goddess way out of his league, and the amount of space reserved for Jesus between them walk out of the shared living space.

#brought to you by my adorable nephew! #shoutout to him lmao! #irondad fic ideas #irondad and spiderson #ironfam #btw this joke is how may and happy reveal they're getting married #may: a badass bitch her nephew and her fiance walk into the house #morgan: WAIT DOES THAT MEAN- #it's also how peter and mj announce that they're having a baby #peter to the starks one morning at breakfast: a grandpa a grandma and an aunt sit at the table #tony spits out his coffee #morgan: shrieking #morgan stark #peter parker #tony stark #wars are fought through this joke also #rhodey arriving for the holidays: the stark children's favorite uncle walks into the party #happy: now wAIT JUST A SECOND #when she's little morgan's word for herself changes every time she gets a new obsession (princess entomologist artist president...) #(she eventually gets to superhero & pepper is NOT amused) #queueueueue

[twilight-deviant]

#Teen Wolf #Teen Wolf Movie #TeenWolfEdit #TWEdit #Peter Hale #Chris Argent #Melissa McCall #Petopher #My GIFs #People have complaints about the movie #both legitimate and ridiculous #Listen I got more scenes with Peter and Chris together #and by “more” I mean “more than one” #I'll take it #This is what the series should have had more of #And it's highkey ridiculous it didn't #It's werewolf dilf and werewolf hunter dilf and... REALLY?! #I probably would have watched a whole movie of just them being snarky and tracking together thanks #Love how Melissa walks away like she's already regretting her choice of teammates #Like it wasn't bad enough she dated both guys #Pfft #I wish I were better at making gifs #I'll get it one day #But also this scene was weird

[accio-sriracha]

What it's like as a Marauder's Era fanfic writer.

~~~♤~~~

You want to know what it's like writing Marauders fanfiction?

Trying to find anything to replace the word SERIOUS.

How many times can I put the words honestly and genuinely and earnestly before my brain literally fries??

I had to change my entire vocabulary because of him. I'm only able to use it with the intention of that joke. I wish i was kidding when I say I can't even say it in person anymore, it's too ingrained.

"Fuck, wait. Not serious, HE'S Sirius." -My Brain. Every. Single. Time.

It's also having to rewrite the sentences: "He sat up straight-", "He walked straight to-", "He looked them straight in the eyes-"

Because NO THE FUCK THEY'RE NOT. THEY'RE NOT STRAIGHT. EVERYONE'S GAY.

Writing Marauders fanfiction is the most rewarding, angst-filled, tooth-rottingly fluffy, WONDERFUL thing in the world, and it literally kills me daily because I don't know THAT many words Sirius can you please just spare me???

#harry potter #marauders #marauders era #remus lupin #sirius black #james potter #peter pettigrew #sirius black is a little shit #marauders headcanon #marauders fanfiction #seriously #siriusly #how do i even write anymore #dead gay wizards from the 70s #everyone is really gay #what do i do #theyre just walking gay disasters #and its really hard to write them when i cant use 'straight' or 'serious' in a sentence

[bagelboys-withcreamcheese]

reluctant adoptive father with a secret soft side and their hyperactive/unhinged child reluctant adoptive father with a secret soft side and their hyperactive/unhinged child reluctant adoptive father with a secret sof

#new and improved #leia’s actual adoptive father is great i love him but her and obiwan just fit well in this trope #dads and the pet they said they didn’t want #sweet tooth #the last of us #the punisher #stranger things #spiderman #hawkeye #red dead redemption 2 #detroit become human #obiwan kenobi #the walking dead #arthur morgan #hosea matthews #frank castle #daryl dixon #peter parker #jim hopper #eleven #joel miller #hank anderson

[acespirit]

you don't understand tumblrinas I wasn't joking about juno steel I'm never joking about juno steel once again I lie there for an hour listening to and thinking about juno steel and again I am overtaken it is midnight thirty I put on my fire safe leather jacket I stand forlornly alone on empty bridges I clandestinely avoid cars and human interaction staring into the night sky in a place that should be full of life yet I am always alone and I AM STILL FEELING THINGS ABOUT JUNO MOTHERFUCKING STEEL--

#the penumbra podcast #juno steel #tpp #i wasnt joking last post #it happened again #it will happen again #lovelies who read the tags you get a bonus #the first time i was overcome by the trance #was actually peter nureyev and the angel of brahma #it was raining that night #i was alone #i went out without a rain coat or boots in the light rain at night in a poorly lit locale #i immediately stepped in a mud slick and partially twisted my ankle #i was not released i continued walking for 30 minutes #just me. and the darkness. and the thoughts of GAYASS MEN

[marvel-lous-guy]

Peter: shit, the doors locked, we're totally gonna be late to the movie!

Tony: No we won't, this is the back entrance Pete, it's gonna be difficult to get in

Peter: Why couldn't we just go in the front doors?

Tony: Peter, what do you think will happen if people see Ironman walking through the front doors?

Peter: right got it. So how do we get in

Tony: I'll just blast the doors down

Peter: NO! You can't do that Tony! That's damage of public property!

Tony: You got a better idea? Come one then! Let's hear it!

Peter:  We can put on those helmets and jackets and grab that ladder!

Tony: and how is that gonna get us in!?

Peter: You can get in anywhere with a ladder!

Tony: PETER! That may work to get into the movies! But it DOES NOT get us into the FUCKING PENTAGON!

Peter: WELL I DONT KNOW HOW TO BREAK INTO THE PENTAGON! I ONLY KNOW HOW TO GET INTO THE MOVIES FOR FREE!

Tony: OH!? SO YOUR A CRIMINAL NOW!?

Peter: IM POOR! I HAD TO SNEAK INTO THE BACK TO WATCH THE GOOD MOVIES!

Steve: do you think we should stop them?

Nat: Nah, this is too good. Way better than that movie we were all gonna catch after

#peter just wanted to go to the cinema after breaking into the pentagon #is that too much to ask #maybe they can just walk in with a ladder #that might work #peter parker #spiderman #tony stark #ironman #natasha romanoff #natasha romanov #black widow #steve rogers #captain america #marvel #mcu #marvel cinematic universe #textpost #incorrect marvel quotes

[your-friendly-neighbourh00d-fag]

okay im having Thoughts about peter strahm. like, he's one of the smartest characters in the whole series. he figured out the jigsaw case so quickly, the whole 'amanda young is too small, she never could have gotten kerry up there alone, jigsaw had another accomplice' etc etc.

but on the other side of the same coin, he's fucking dumb. he dies not because he wasn't intelligent enough to get out of the trap, but because he had too much hubris. he thought he knew better, he thought he could beat the game. and that was ultimately what killed him. his pride. its like. yes he was smart enough to get out of the water cube, that was a very quick move. but he wouldn't have been in the water cube if he'd had enough sense to leave. strahm had john's corpse, an unedited tape that tied the whole thing back to john, and both the rooms with mandy, lynn and jeff and riggs, matthews and art blank. there was so much evidence. he could have just walked away, but he didn't.

and that's what makes him such a compelling character.

#mikey.txt. #im rambling cause im watching V again but god he truly is one of the characters of all time #“jigsaw doesn't MAKE mistakes!!!!!!” and yet he thinks he can outsmart the coffin trap. #like strahm had the tape!!! with hoffmans voice on it!! he could have just walked out the door!!!!! AND YET #thinking about him for too long makes me insane #peter strahm #saw iv #saw v #sawposting

[definitly-not-harley-keener]

Daredevil: Could you explain your “spider-sense” to me?

Spider-Man: oh yea. It’s ’no thoughts, only vibes’.

#incorrect marvel quotes #incorrect mcu quotes #marvel #peter parker #mcufam #harley keener #i can literally see his empty face in front of me #iron man #tony stark #tony stark quotes #daredevil #matt murdock #spider non of the tags i’m finding have the hyphen man #spider there is a hyphen man #spider man #me the literal embodiment of #no thoughts just vibes #walking into class #realising I’m the only one there #and I will have to answer questions #fuck