#but a funny one

[marvel-lous-guy]

Tony: who would you say is the most innocent out of us?

Harley: Peter.

Tony: really? Not Capsicle?

Steve: Come on, Tony! It was one time!

Harley: watch this. Hey Peter! What's first base?

Peter: hand holding

Harley: and second base?

Peter: running your hand through their hair

Harley: and third base?

Peter: them seeing you have a panic attack

Tony: yeah, okay, this kid is too innocent for his own good

Clint: I'm gonna tell him

Tony: *repulsers on his hands* DON'T YOU DARE!

#Now Tony and Clint are wrestling on the floor #Pietro is filming it #They forgot what they are fighting about #Nat is cheering clint on #harley is cheering Tony on #its all a huge mess #but a funny one #peter just walked in #he is so confused #marvel #marvel cinematic universe #peter parker #tony stark #steve rogers #clint barton #incorrect mcu quotes #incorrect mcu #marvel incorrect quotes #incorrect quotes #incorrect peter parker #mcu

[fanonical]

to be honest, unless you’re a child soldier apologist, Vriska actually did do nothing wrong

#ok it’s still an exaggeration #but a funny one #Homestuck #Vriska Serket

[theraccoonwtf]

Keeper doesn't have a whoopee cushion, or a shock button, but a slimy plastic cockroach that he usually puts on his hand after introducing himself to someone.

#undertale #undertale au #undertale original character #undertale oc #frisk #sans oc #oc sans #keeper sans #yeah hes a lil idiot #but a funny one

[milkshake-and-cream]

NIEYAO MODERN DIVORCE

NMJ: I can't believe you would let this happen!

JGY: Oh please, it's not that big a deal!

NMJ: Not a big deal! You've taken away my little brothers innocence!

JGY: You have clearly never seen his search history. Whatever innocence he may have had was swept away once he learned what porn was.

NMJ: Shut up! I can't believe you would betray my trust like this!

JGY: It was just a movie.

NMJ: A R-RATED MOVIE!

JGY: He's almost eighteen! And the movie wasn't even that bad.

NMJ: Not that bad? A man get's his head cut off! There were orgy's! People were getting murdered in the middle of orgy's!

JGY: Again, his search history is much worse.

NMJ: GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!

#mdzs #nie mingjue #jin guangyao #not a proper adaption of the divorce #but a funny one #my post

[schiste-argileux]

should I make. a transformers uquiz

#but a funny one #not srs #lmao

[iwantabatlleaxe]

I ate too much chocolate earlier and now im stuck in the bathroom with my niece calling me asking if I'm "almost done so we can keep drawing" honey im fighting for my life afraid that I am actually lactose intolerant and dont know because my family consumes low lactose stuff im not ready

#oversharing? maybe #this is like a horror movie #but a funny one

[butchfalin]

the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again

#yeehaw #1k #5k #10k #posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours? #also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that! #unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference #edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense #also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags #1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now #he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic #2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign #like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock #3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing #it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is #extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once #it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life #i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about #Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect #if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it #aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Knowledge Revenge.

#dungeon meshi #chilchuk tims #senshi #Somewhat of an unofficial sequel to the Dragon Comic. I promise I have more versatility in my jokes. I just had to take this opportunity. #Senshi is pretty much a recluse. I think he would know a few of these 'gottems' but not all. #Chilchuck would know gottems that are nearly lost to time. The deep cuts. The ones that you fall for because they are that obscure. #I would also like to take a moment to confess that after the last comic in which I posed a gottem - #I fell victim to a Mind Goblin Attack. I was thoroughly got. I will be on higher alert this time. #So NOBODY be funny in the tags. I am gullible and I like to share things with my friends. Who are *ruthless*. #I have a mild resistance to Vicious Mockery at this point but I can only take so much. #Happy Thistle Thursday Everyone! See you next week!

[dishsaop]

the worst part about being an adult is thay its no longer socially acceptable to just roll down a really big hill and then run back up it and roll back down again. "oh is this a syphilis metaphor" passerby would ask. "is this for a tick tock". no i just wanna come home covered in dirt and scratches and bask in the the solace of childlike mirth

#m text #everyone rbing this without the addition and commenting 'op did you mean sisyphus' yes. yes i did #'where did the discord screenshot reblog go did you delete it' well in the 10mn after posting it someone had a funnier reblog #so i was like oh. ill delete the less funny one i did for the funnier one #and then. guess what got big.

[littlelightfish]

Funny things I found out playing with language setting in Netflix while looking episode 15:

Chilchuck's scream sounds HAUNTED in brazilian portuguese. Give it a try if you can.

(You can hear it here)

In spanish dub, Senshi says: "tocó mis senos de hombre", which means "he touched my man boobs" in Spanish. And I think that's the best dub line one so far.

#i love replaying certain scenes (usually screams) to see how they nailed it in other dubs #ive done it with Chilchuck & Mickbell screams because they're the funniest ones #give it a shot if you can #its really funny to hear certain character voices in other languages #for example. brazilian portuguesse gave both mickbell and chilchuck un-childlike voices (in japaneese both sound like little childs) #and they reused Chilchuck's japaneese screams for most of the other languages because he is so high-pitched and full of terror that it work #dungeon meshi #chilchuck #chilchuck tims #dunmeshi #delicious in dungeon #senshi #senshi of izganda #senshi dungeon meshi #idk how do you people screen record the episodes #if i knew how to i would put the shots here #my shit #thanks to the one that made the clip on Chil's scream im in love here <3

[akajustmerry]

Anastasia 1997 is such a funny movie in that it's opening sequence is like, "the Romanovs died because rasputin put a curse on them AND NO OTHER REASON DON'T WORRY ABOUT WHY THE ROMANOVS ARE DEAD OKAY IT WAS RASPUTIN"

#I'm not dissing it it's one of the best films ever but it's anti communism is so funny #/

[daftmooncretin]

spock’s room decor is actually fucking bonkers. The weapons??? the big red velvet curtain??? like ok phantom of the opera go crazy.

for reference jim’s room has some photos and a plant so we can surmise this is uniquely a spock being a dramatic weirdo thing

#spock baby im sorry but it looks like the backdrop of one of those alpha male podcasts #nurse chapel is stronger then me because if i saw this frat boy ass decor i would have immediately gotten the ick and left #the lack of coherent design is so funny #ALSO CAN WE TALK ABOUT HOW TO CURTAIN IS COVERING THE SHELVES WHICH IS SUCH A SMALL THING BUT IT MAKES ME SO MAD WHY SPOCK WHY #i hope bones never saw this room because he would have a fucking field day #star trek #star trek tos #spirk #jim kirk #spock #tos

[cannibalchicken]

#lol #haha #comedy #humor #funny #memes #cannibalchicken #$25 for the gay one (affectionately)

[spyglassrealms]

had a fucking hilarious dream that tumblr replaced the "block" function with the far funnier "glock" function, which did the exact same thing except whenever anyone blocked you a random bullet hole, like a png of a bullet hole, would appear on your blog. discourse blogs were unreadable bc you'd go to the page and the sheer amount of bullet hole pngs stacked over the blogs obscured everything. I woke myself up laughing

#normally I don't chronicle my dreams here but fucking hell that one was funny #I think this would genuinely make tumblr better tbh #@ staff do this cowards #spy has thoughts #my life is a sitcom and i am my own laugh track #functional website #spy's smash hits #Glock function #edit for everyone in the notes saying 'everyone clapped' #I know I can't prove to you that it happened for real you're just gonna have to trust me on this #but I swear on my goddamn life I'm not making this up #I make so many conscious puns that sometimes my subconscious cooks up a real good one

[xekstrin]

One of the most memorable interactions was Saturday. Into our booth strolls a small family, tempted by free samples of freshly brewed tea. We chatter and give them the spiel, that the tea is character merch and we’re a cozy health-based app called Forage Friends.

The young girl zeroes in on our pride pins.

“They have my pin!” She says excitedly. “They have my flag!”

The dad blinks. He is surprised, but also calm and positive when he sees it’s the lesbian flag. “Oh. That’s… different from what you told me.”

“That was months ago, dad.” And she rolls her eyes. Definitely a teenager.

I turn to him and say, “Yeah, dad.” And we share a little laugh about it.

He says, “No, it’s great. That’s amazing, honey. It was just news to me.”

“Well, I guess I just decided to stop lying to myself. About liking guys. Like right now.”

A little lesbian just came out to her dad and he was super cool about it.

I’m standing there in my tie-dye mask and my cheery blue apron pouring tea and making small talk and I’m trying really hard not to cry or compare it to my experience, the fire & brimstone, the disgust, the conditional acceptance as long as I never bring it up.

So as this beautiful bonding is going on, the girl’s even younger brother turns his gaze around. He’s in a snorlax hoodie and bored and wants to go look at the swords across the hall. But on the other side of our booth….

“WHY DO PEOPLE DRAW THAT?” He asks loudly, and we all turn to our neighboring booth.

Our neighbors were extremely lovely people. Every time we had a break we would talk, and we became good friends over the weekend. They kept apologizing that their booth was next to ours and we kept repeating that it was totally fine. Their booth was great. I even bought their merchandise.

The thing that was so contentious, that they felt the need to apologize for, was that they were selling explicit titty hentai stickers of popular characters. They were censored with little yellow R18 labels but the content was very clear.

So back to the family: I freeze and immediately go somewhere else to let dad handle this question. With adult customers I’ve been loud and positive about our neighbors. (“Man, how has it been boothing next to them?” It’s been great! They bring a lot of foot traffic and they’re kind and wonderful professional neighbors. If anything it’s a fun juxtaposition. We believe in artistic freedom. I bought a sticker too!)

But this is a kid, it’s not my place to explain anything…. But I was extremely curious about what this chill dad would say.

“Well,” dad says with a long measured silence between each word. “Sometimes people are horny.”

#IT WAS SO FUNNY #the kid was like GROSS #and dad was like its art :) #maybe one day you will feel that way too son #and he was like NO NEVER GROSS #and the dad was like you know what thats true :) not everyone feels that way #but maybe some day you will and you’ll see it’s totally fine and normal #A+ dad #dad of all time #dad champion #forage friends

[artkaninchenbau]

Crocodile finds a strange stray cat an 11-year old Nico Robin (AU where they met 13 years earlier. Robin's been on the run from the World Government for 3 years. Crocodile's 27 and has not set up base in Alabasta yet)

It seems like I have become possessed. By some sort of demon.

Bonus:

#My art #One Piece #Nico Robin #Sir Crocodile #Y'all the OP brainrot is BAD #According to an SBS Crocodile would absolutely spoil his child rotten if he had one. *We all know how Robin's childhood went* #Scary mofo who does not know how to parent a child but boy does he have the spirit + Child who has never had proper parent in her life #They'd make. An absolute disaster of a duo. This AU concept is so fucking funny to me okay #But also sad because I would fucking die for baby Robin she deserves the fucking world #This poor girl has never been spoiled in her entire life AND NOW PAPADILE IS HERE TO SPOIL HER #You know it's funny. I know 11 yo Robin should LOOK older than 8 year old Robin. But Crocodile is a fucking giant so she's still baby sized #Also I just had too much fun drawing Robin looking as pathetic as humanly possible lmao #She's a like a wet kitten in the rain 😭