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shinebrightlikeanarwhal · 3 years

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Travis-centered plots because I Like fix it’s… (I just finished typing them all, I’m ashamed for my sinful brain oml)

- Larry and Travis having once been friends but being torn apart by Travis’ father. Larry keeping an eye on Travis for years but then turning his attention to Sal, whom in turn receives the sudden disdain of Travis.

Sal confronts Travis in the bathrooms one day and Larry listens from the door. Eventually Sal talks Travis into tears. He confesses to being jealous of Sal and not wanting Larry to stop focusing on him, even if Larry ends up hating him. How his dad would beat him if Travis and Larry ever got close again. Larry barges in and holds Travis close. They reconcile (Sal opting to let the boys talk, clearly not in the mood to see Enemies to Lovers tonguing den in the school bathroom.

They uproot and destroy the cult, blah blah blah, Happily ever after and Travis gets help for his trauma induced depression and anxiety.

- Travis has been off for a few days. He doesn’t antagonize anyone. Philip does more talking and ginger touching that Travis violently jerks away from. During class he barely responds and teachers don’t try to force him. Sal didn’t expect to find Travis sleeping on a bench one day. His worn shoes now tattered with holes at the bottom. His black eye prominent but accompanied by a busted lip and what looked to be severe damage to his legs.

Not sure how he did it, but Sal managed to convince Travis to come home with him. Introduces Travis to Henry and leads him to the bathroom where he washed off and got treated. His damage was severe and Sal really wanted to call the police but just seeing a fearful Travis weened him off the idea.

Larry was not too pleased to find Travis at Sals. He almost yelled until he noted Travis look at his raised hand and cower from him. Larry pausing and pulls Sal to the side to understand. Of course they don’t know the full story but it’s enough to have Larry texting the group for help. Most were curious about what could lead them to wanting to help Travis. Ash, however, seemed to know a lot.

They find out about Travis’ abuse, the cult. Travis helps a little. He is still terrified of them but they start to grow on him with time. He even allows contact with Sal rarely, who shows him his face during a bonding moment at the dead of night. Larry makes playlists and CDs to help Travis get accustomed to loud noises (many of which are songs Larry personally thinks Travis would enjoy.

After the gang destroys and puts the cult behind bars. No demons, no murders, and no dead friends. Sal manages to convince Travis to report his father, thankfully they kept his clothes to give to the state police, Todd refused to trust the local police after further investigating the cult and their connections.

Healing and coping, cuddling and coddling. Travis getting the love and attention he deserves! Could end with him dating someone or him just being under their care for a while.

—Salvis but Sal is a bit more aggressive with Travis. Fuck it ABO, Travis is a very spicy omega that pretends to be a Beta. Sal is a strong scented alpha, like it’s a musky and domineering scent compared to his appearance. Larry is an alpha, though his scent is murky and smoky, and he doesn’t act like the stereotypical alpha. Travis nitpicks them like usual, though sometimes they are too distracted by the nice smell seeping off of him. Larry sneers and asks if Travis mom scented him before school. Travis is upset at this. Much more emotional than usual. Sal notes the spike in scent and jabs Larry.

Uh oh, Travis is presenting in the bathroom, and beta Philip isn’t able to fight off the alphas coming to investigate the scent, thankfully Sal is here to soothe and calm the terrified Travis while his friends help fend off the other students.

Mr. Phelps is pissed about an omega son. Travis is constantly scented with distress. He isn’t allowed to talk about it but everyone can smell it. They are well aware of Travis’ fluctuating weight, fatigue and his tan skin turning pale and bruised worse than before. Larry is annoyed by this but can’t tell whether it’s the scent affecting him or his stern belief in protecting omegas from abusive alphas.

Sal hates it, he knows he felt the mate bond but Travis doesn’t seem to notice. Travis’ suffering eats away at Sal until he all but corners Travis and propositions him to save him from his father and give him sanctuary. It takes a lot to convince Travis. Heck, he has to promise Larry wouldnt hurt him (Larry later seeks Travis to reconcile their bad blood).

They get to know eachother. Sal is head over heels and watching Travis grow and blossom into his omega blood. Travis starts falling for someone else and Sal tries to be supportive (until he can’t even look at Travis without feeling heartache). But Travis notes he doesn’t love ____ And follows his heart to Sal. They bond, they love and boom, happy little family. (With three cute babies because Travis and Sal deserve happy families)

Larvis: roughly the same as the salvos ABO but Larry straight up picks up Travis and carries him home. Travis tries to fight but is swaddled and pampered until he’s fast asleep and purring in Larry’s arms.

Mr. Phelps doesn’t have much ground to stand on when he tries to take Travis back. Larry confirming that Travis is his mate and based off of Phelps’ beliefs he should reside with his mate.

Travis is surprised his father backs off so easily (because how could the pastor refute what he preaches?? Such blasphemy would be heard by the church blah blah blah). Larry and Travis talk and Larry admits that they are indeed mates, he never brought it up for Travis’ health. He was already struggling to care for himself, a mating bond would send his already feeble body and fragile mind spiraling. Larry also admits he knew they were mates ever since he presented, which wasn’t that long after entering highschool. But, Travis was so proud to be ‘normal’ and not some horny mess like the others. He also didn’t like seeing Travis harass and bully others, which probably aided in his aggressive rejection of the omega and prolonged Travis’ presentation.

Life goes on and Larry and Travis are happily married with four kids (two more in the oven, because Larry is a very affectionate husband). Cult was handled and Sal is NOT dead and very much the worlds best uncle.

-Travis having a hot girl summer.

That’s it. That’s the plot.

Thotty church twink marching about in short shorts and tank tops (sinful!) showing off his goodies to the masses. Larry shamelessly offers to partake, and gets thrown for a whirlwind when Travis’ phat ass is delightfully uncontrollable. Sal jokingly shoots his shot and winds up slumped in the back of the church from immaculate head.

Mr. Phelps is away so the thot is out to play. (Courtesy of Mama Phelps aiding and abetting her sons growth as a person. He may be throwing it back to the boys he once sneered at but at least he’s nicer to people)

-Travis being rescued from the Phelps home after a concerned report to the state police. The church closed and his father put behind bars for many accounts of child abuse and neglect and the disappearance of Travis’ mother.

Sal and gang are curious about what the new home will do to Travis after months of rehabilitation, and all damn near faint when they see Travis with long pink hair and a cute sun dress marching into the school. Directly towards them and apologizing for his horrible treatment of them, specifically Sal. They can’t believe his change at first but after weeks of watching him, he seems genuinely happier.

This new happiness starts to get unsettling to Larry, who watches Travis and Philip be closer than before. He shouldn’t care he hates Travis! But god he wished the boy would wrap his arms around his and march down the halls. He would kill to get surprise back hugs or do the hugging. He wanted to share lunch with Travis. Be hand fed meals and have his mouth cleaned whilst being scolded.

Fuck, he’s in love! He thought he nipped that in the bud when Sal started getting bullied by Travis. But no, Travis being rescued from his awful father and being a genuinely good person from then on was astounding. Hell, he even brought Sal treats as an apology for walking in on him with his mask off once. Sal said it was fine but Travis babbled ok about feeling bad because Sal looked terrified even though Travis didn’t think Sal was any less cool. (Yes, Sal cried in his room about how much it meant for someone to say that).

For fucks sake, Travis had pictures upon pictures of his new family and their pets. PETS. He had dooogs, god Larry lost his mind seeing Travis jogging around town with dogs in shorts and a sweaty, almost see through tank top!! He’s too gay for this.

He finally confesses, maybe tries to play it off as a joke, but Travis just smiles sweetly and pecks his cheek. He’s sorry but he’s already dating someone. Larry tries not to let his disappointment show, but he just can’t feel the need to go to school for a couple of days. Hides out in his tree house and just smokes. Cause, cmon.. who’d wanna date him?? All he does is smoke and play around! He hasn’t had a stable relationship in years and most he’s known for is sleeping with whoever he deems the hottest.

Sal notices his behavior and tries to comfort him, not sure why Larry is like this, by offering to introduce him to his partner. Maybe they have a friend Larry is interested in. Larry wants to be supportive but he really doesn’t care to see Sals new beau(ty). He really just wanted to camp out in the tree house and smoke away the pain. Or, he did until he sees Travis and Sal holding hands and nuzzling on the couch one day. Sals legs on Travis’ and Travis combing Sals hair. Larry felt like his world came crashing down, his best friend?? And his first and worst crush?? The crush that sent him spiraling for what could have been weeks? Sal is innocent, he didn’t know that Larry was madly in love with Travis. Didn’t know that Travis so politely rejected him and offered to cease contact if Larry felt he couldn’t be around him.

Larry wasn’t much of a romantic after that. He played around with whoever he felt needed love. His partying spiraling out of control in adult hood. Travis tried to contact him and help him find a good person, but any attempts to help Larry ended with Larry crying to him drunkenly. Asking why he wasn’t good enough, why he couldn’t have been Sal. Travis wasn’t allowed near Larry after Larry drunkenly made advances at him, he doesn’t blame Larry he’s extremely emotional, but Sal felt Larry would only get worse the more they stayed in contact, so they were kept apart.

Larry never loved anyone as much as he loved Travis Fisher.

-Last one was a sadder Onesided Larvis, this one is Larry teasing and cornering Travis so much that Travis tries to shock him by kissing him. He came home with some hickies and a very prominent limp.

They’re not saying, yet, but Wingman Sal is politely judging Travis into Larry’s arms. They are constantly alone together. Larry blowing Travis’ back out in an abandoned amusement park when the others split up to explore. “He sprained his ankle running from a shadow” Hmph, Travis smelt like axe. He HATES the smell of axe… but okay lovebirds.

Sal has 100% walked in on the secret lovers getting frisky when moms out. Later helps Travis shop for more pretty clothes, because who wouldn’t want a shopping body??? That’s almost illegal to not take the opportunity.

Larry eats ass. A lot. Travis can literally be on FaceTime shopping with Sal and Larry just slips under the covers and enjoys his fill of boyfriend cheekies~ yum!

Travis, as revenge, will give the gawk gawk 9000. Larry is NOT safe if he thinks Travis has forgotten the embarrassment of Sal chuckling and telling him he has to go walk his homework. He could be on the phone with his boss or Lisa and Travis will give the sloppiest top he’s ever had. (Praise the son for horni bratty bottoms)

#travis phelps #laravis #Larry x Travis #salvis #sal x travis #larvis #sal fisher #sally face au #sally face #larry johnson #I’m but a hole #so Travis will be too #I have more but I so tired ;u; don’t wanna think #but yeah Travis either getting help or being adopted and rehabilitated #god I love the idea of Travis with long luscious hair in the prettiest gowns #prancing around the school and bringing hand made treats to his peers #special treats to the one he likes #long post

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miraculousrainbow · 3 years

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Sleeping In The Bathroom Is Better Than Home

Description:

Chat noir cannot stand being at home anymore and by chance stumbles upon Marinette wich turns into an unexpected sleepover

Hurt/comfort

Marichat (can be viewd as romantic or platonic)

Oneshot

Trigger warnings : mention of verbal abuse, mentions of neglect, discussions of bad mental health, bad mental health, insomnia, anxiety, trapping a child mention (ask to tag)

"Im done and sick of it"

He couldnt think straight, he just knew that he needed to get out as fast as he can

Plag popped out in a look of concern but before he could say anything Adrien already climbed out the window and yelled "Plagg claws out" and jumped out

His movement wasent his usual cat like swiftness

It was heavy and frantic

He was stumbling around in the dark and crashing into a wall or a random pole every once in a while but ignoring it as nothing happened and just, keeps going

He was going around blindly

With the only purpose of just, getting away

After a while of hanging about at the dark he calmed down a bit, but he was still fearful

His dad yelling still ringing in his ears and with each sound feeling like another hit

"Ignore it he insisted"

"You are here, you are safe, you are not at home anymore."

"You are safe." he whispered to himself loudly with a bit of a panic in his voice and a desperation to make these words feel true

But it was getting late he knew that soon he will need to go back home but he couldnt bring himself

He would rather sleep outside

"The only problem is that he would be an easy target for hawkmoth or criminals depending on the form"

"Or he could just stay a-"

His thought had been cut mid sentence while he was walking he realised he sees a familiar light and in the light had been basking a familiar figure

"Marinette!" He exclaimed with relief in his voice

"It was nice seeing a friend out here and a light source when everything else seems so dark and bleak and eerily quiet..."

"Chat Noir?" Marinette blinked trying to figure out where the dark ends and where the cat starts

"Its nice to see you" he said with a sheepishly smile

"Is there an akuma" Marinette eyes darted from place to place while her expression seemed so focused she wouldnt miss a fly

"Not tonight princess" he replied feeling a bit guilty he made her worry

A sigh of relief escaped the teen's mouth and her expression softened

And when she looked up to his surprise she looked like she is actually happy to see him

"So what brings you here ~Chat Noir~." she said his superhero name like you would call someone a royalty title jokingly

"Wich... was fair, but! he just hoped she knew every time he called her princess it was full of fondness"

"Oh um, just going for a walk, getting some fresh air"

"At two at night"

"I can ask you the same princess" he stumbled on his words he didnt expect that

"He havent being keeping an eye on the hour"

"He hoped he wasent missing for too long"

"But with his father absence he sometimes thinks he could of being kidnaped by hawkmoth for days and he wouldnt even notice"

"and sometimes he could of just barged into the room out of the blue"

"For ones he hoped for the first one"

Marinette unexpectedly decided to be the first one to break the silence

"Thoughts, just too many thoughts" she replied honestly and wiped her eyes in tiredness and maybe tears

Even though her answer seemed quite generic he recognised the real weight these words hold

"You?" She asked softly in sleepiness

"I just couldnt handle staying there anymore"

He blurted out choking on a bit of tears

"Her honestly just made him feel like he couldnt keep it inside anymore and that he could just share it safely and it will be okay"

"Like he didnt have to keep it down anymore and he really couldnt not like this not when he finally feels safe and the adrenaline from earlier is starting to die out and the tiredness is kicking in"

"Not next to Marinette"

"When she just comes with honestly openness and without anything to hide behind"

"She could of waited a little longer he would have come up with a joke to sweep her off her feet or at least made her laugh thats a win too"

"And just have a normal conversation"

"But she chose openness and he couldnt help, but choose it too"

He was a bit shaking he didnt notice till Marinette put a hand on him "hey, do you wanna go talk inside?"

The cat was frozen in surprise at the sudden touch

but as soon as it went is as soon as it goes

"And I know your identity needs to remain a secret for yours and the safety of your loved ones"

"So tell me just as you can and want of course" she made a serious face in the end but he couldnt ignore how cute it was

He noded thankful and followed her in

"Not surprisingly her room was much warmer than the cold outside"

They set down and Marinette asked while fiddling with her fingers "So, what happened?"

"My dad just yelled at me"

"Again" he rolled his eyes with a snort of someone who learned to turn their anger into despair and nihilistic jokes

"Its or he leaves me alone and neglects me or he yells at me and traps me"

"And in the past it used to be or he neglects me and traps me or he yells at me and traps me"

"But good luck trapping Chat Noir ha ha" he said with exhaustion and finger guns

"Unless you are hawkmoth if he would of being I bet he would have trapped me then too" another bitter laugh escaped his mouth

"What about you?"

"So you know those nights when you try to go to bed and you just lay there but you cant stop thinking and your thought are running and running and you just start shaking and you cant stop and no matter what you cant sleep and you wish so badly you can but you just cant so you stand up cause you cant take it anymore"

She blurted out as well just more in a mini frantic tangent

Instead of a frantic blurt out

"So maybe" she says with a twirl of her hand like she tries to drag the word longer and just not let the sentence end

"Im having one of these nights"

She covered her face with her hand and looked away like she is even ashamed of having a problem

"Wich is super unfair everyone has problems" he scoffed in his head

"And also one thing was made sure by this conversation she was crying earlier"

"Actually yeah" he replied looking up from his knees and surprising them both

"I do get these nights from time to time"

"Now it was his turn to look away"

"Now he is the one feeling shame in having problems"

"Honestly, he thinks it made both of them feel better knowing they are not the only ones even though he and of course Marinette! would never wish this upon each other it was still nice being in the same boat"

"Its exhausting" she exclaimed and looked like she was trying to rest her had on air and getting grumpy each time it doesnt work

Chat tapped to time on his knees to signal that she can use him as a pillow

Marinette without taking a second thought took the invite and settled down

At the moment of contact Chat Noir felt like lightening were running up his spine he just hoped he didnt move

He wasent used to other ppl contact much

And he always withdrew away quite quickly

"Its not that he didnt like others touch"

"Its just that it would always overwhelm him so much"

"And it made him feel like he needed a break but every time he was ready to come back"

"There was nobody left"

"And lets not talk about how it was before school when there was nobody to begin with"

"She looked so comfortable like it was all natural being so close to someone and just putting your head down"

"He wishes he could feel like that too"

"He hopes one day he will"

After a moment of rest and a sigh of relief Marinette asked "So, whats the plan?"

"Kinda how he would of asked his lady on battle he wondered if thats how he looks like"

"Uh, I kinda planned on staying awake outside until I will collapse of exhaustion..."

"Well, thats a horrible plan."

"In retrospect, he agreed but its not like he had any other options" he thought to himself

"The only room with a decent lock is the bathroom but I cant let you sleep in the bathroom!"

"I considered sleeping outside so this sounds much better"

"Chat!" She protested

"Its not like I have any better options" he sighed into his hand

"Okie but Im putting a clock to 5 in the morning so you will be back before anyone notices"

"But then what about you? dont you need any sleep?"

"I dont think I will fall asleep befor 5 am to be honest" she made an awkward laugh in an attempt to make it seem not as bad

"And, having company for a change even if will be a sleeping one soon is nice."

She looked up to him still resting on his lap with a soft smile that looks like it means Im really thankful you are here but you need to go to sleep now

"Marinette I-" he couldnt help but let a sigh of relief escape his mouth "I cant thank you enough"

"Hey what there are partne- pretty good friends for!"

"She started stammering. Now he was sure she was too tired for communication and needed some rest"

"So lets get ready for the sleep part in our kind of spontaneous sleepover!" she said like it was all part of just a regular late night party

He chuckled and replied with a simple sappy "yeah" and he got ready to bed

And in a long time he actually had a good sleep even though it was in the bathroom

The end <3

Update: thank you everyone for the feedback!!!

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starshipsofstarlord · 4 years

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Wild Thing - James Cook x Reader 🔥

Summary: Some people think Cook is the crazy one, but have they met you? Your antics drive Cook insane, and he doesn't know how to handle it

James Cook walked through the halls of college with JJ and Freddie by his side, as if it were a normal day. But it wasn't.

It was barren of life. Devoid of a bright hue that dashed across the floor. It was missing you.

Cook remembered when he’d met you. He thought you were a good girl trying to be a bad one. However he was wrong, utterly and completely. You weren't even a little good.

That was what made him so allured by you. You weren't what he had expected you to be, and it reeled him in so divinely.

JJ and Freddie wanted Effy, but he had his eyes set on (Y/N). She was less obvious. She wasn't bad to revel against what happened to her beforehand, she was bad just because she wanted to be.

"It might be quiet in class today." JJ speculated, well aware of your absence.

You had been suspended for causing a fire in the girls bathroom. It surprised no one, not a single soul. Doug only shook his head and handed you the suspension slip, you smiling as you accepted the paper.

"Yeah." Freddie wasn't sure what to comment so that was all he said.

You seemed fun but a dangerous kind. And he was on his toes, awaiting for you to do something despite you not supposed to be here.

"More like fucking boring." Cook stated, leaning against a locker as JJ shuffled for his books.

And then he saw a shadow slip down the hall, dressed in black. From head to feet, you were covered in the dark material, as if you were wishing to absorb in any hint of a shadow so that you wouldnt be spotted. "Or maybe not..."

He couldn't help himself, your presence was too intoxicating. And so he began walking in your direction, but Freddie stopped him.

"We have class." JJ reminded him, it would be starting soon enough.

"Fuck class, I've seen something better." And so he left the two there, and went down the hallway which he had seen you go.

The nurse's office. That was where you had lead him. He thought he'd be rude not to accept your invitation, and so he swiped his eyes around the hall, and then entered.

"It's halfway through the day, and yet you've only just seen me." A blunt was held in the parting of your lips, your amusement slightly muffled by it.

Cook watched as you tugged out your lighter, sparking the tip with the small yet powerful flame.

You breathed in the contents, a satisfied smile spreading upon your face. "What're you up to?" He asked suspiously.

Whatever it was, he had no intent in stopping you. He was merely just curious of why you were at college. You had been suspended, giving you a chance to go anywhere. Why come back?

"Maybe I wanted to see my favourite cookie..." You winked at the boy, making his heart race.

No other girl had such an impact on him. You were the only one that had ever managed to make him nervous. "Is that really why?" He asked cautiously.

"And I've never had sex in a nurse's office." You speculated, tapping your black nails upon the desk you were sat on.

You handed him the blunt, watching as he inhaled and instantly relaxed. The effects were strong, and maybe they'd help you get exactly what you wanted.

You pulled your hair from its bun, letting the tresses extend down onto and past your shoulders. "What do you say. Are you in?"

Was that a joke? Of course he was. He flicked the spliff to the floor, finding you for more intoxicating. He'd be stupid to pass up an opportunity such as this.

Cook stepped between your legs, running his calloused hands up and down your bare thighs. "Do you really want to do this?" He checked. Usually he didn't with other girls, but you were different. You meant something to him.

"Hurry up." You whined, tugging on the collar of his shirt and pulling him closer to you so that you could nip at his bottom lip.

He reached down, pulling your shirt over your head. His eyes were drawn to your cleavage but they moved up to your face. He cupped your jaw, molding your lips together in a passionate lock.

It felt like the kiss of a lifetime. It was like you were infecting his veins through it.

You stood from the desk, letting your lips leave his for a moment. Removing your shorts, you were left in your underwear and your weathered docs.

"I don't think this is fair James." James. No one called him by that, other than his mother who he barely saw.

Your fingers trailed down, playing with his belt. As you did so, he discarded of his shirt, and then pulled your hands away so he could undo the buckle.

You pushed his jeans down, transferring to rubbing him over his boxers. Cook groaned, letting his head fall down into the crook of your neck.

From there he could smell your jasmine perfume, he couldn't help himself he ran his tongue over the skin, making you push your hair aside to give him more access.

"Do you have a condom?" You asked, pushing his mouth away from your neck.

He didn't. Shit. He moved away from you, digging through the office drawers. Bingo, there was a box.

Cook took one, pushing down his boxers as you did the same with your own underwear. He was quick to rip open the packet as you inspected his body.

"Your bigger than I thought you'd be." You commented with a smirk. He wasn't sure whether it should have boosted his ego or not, but nevertheless, he still put the condom on.

"Back up." He told you, patting the desk space. And you hoisted yourself onto the platform, spreading your legs for the bad boy.

He held his cock in his hand, pushing the head slowly through your lips. Your head shot back. "Shit." You whined.

"Is this why you came to school, huh? For my cock?" The boy taunted you, moving forward in and out, quickening his pace.

One of your hands scratched the surface of the wood, the other clawed his left shoulder.

"Yes." You breathed. "I've been wanting to fuck you for ages." You informed him, which only helped him boost his pace.

His thumb slid down to your clit, rolling it with the pad. You hit into his shoulder to quieten yourself, and that only made Cook feel that much closer.

"I'm gonna cum." You told your fellow student, your lips brushing against his alabaster skin.

"Let go." He commanded you. As he said that, he let out one last moan before he himself finished, releasing inside the latex. You came after.

Sweat stuck in both of your hair. You got down from the desk, reaching down to grab you thong and readjusting your bra.

"That was good. Really good." Cook breathed, fumbling for his own clothes as you were nearly dressed.

Perhaps this was his chance to tell you all about how you made him feel. What you did to him in a non sexual way.

You had just slipped your shirt back on, and were combing your fingers through the mess of your hair.

"Maybe sometime we could-" He was cut off, the bell ruining the moment.

You smiled at him, the sweetest one he had received. "I'd better go, before a teacher catches me. See ya Cookie." You blew him a kiss before slipping out of the room.

....

Cook pondered in deep thought, his chin resting on his hand. You were all at Effy's, and that was the problem. You were there.

You had to said a thing to him about what had happened. "We should invite some boys."

It was Katie's suggestion, and Panda was quick to nod to it. You were all still getting to know each other, and Cook noticed that you were clearly not opposed to the idea.

"As long as they're cute." You commented, taking a swig from the bottle of vodka you were nursing. Your face fought not to scrunch up, and Cook thought it was adorable. But that wouldn't be the right thing to say. He didn't even know how to converse normally with you.

And so more people that you hardly recognised were invited.

Cook hated Katie in that moment. You had all been fine together, but no, she wanted other people involved. It lead to you grinding upon some random guy who was treating your body like property.

And the worst thing was, you didn't seem to mind. If anything, you were quite enjoying the attention.

That should have been him, not some guy who had bleached his hair for attention. You were wild, and it was driving him crazy. He never wanted to tame you, he was mental too, but he wanted the desire to be mutual.

"Forget about it." Freddie advised him, noticing where his gaze had been for the majority of the night.

"I can't." He argued. It would hurt him more to see you just as a friend. You deserved love and he wanted to be the one to give it to you.

"She won't change." JJ protested.

That was the thing. Cook didn't want you to change, except the man you were happlessly grinding against. After he saw that smile after your earlier activities, he knew that there was much more to you than what he had already seen.

"You shouldn't want her to, she's fun." Panda said, laughing her tits off at the thought. She was clearly intoxicated.

You were fun. And Cook knew he wanted to have fun with you, not watch you enjoying it without him. So he walked through the crowd of dancing bodies and couldn't help himself.

His fist swung before he or anyone else could stop him hitting the guy you were entertaining right in the temple.

"What the fuck Cook!" You screamed at him, but then it turned into laughs.

A guy tried to come at him, but Freddie pushed them away, trying to calm everyone watching down.

JJ tried to drag him away from the situation. He couldn't leave though, not without saying anything. "I feel something for you!" He shouted over the music.

Again you just seemed humoured by the statement. "You think you do. That's because we fucked Cook. It was just sex, nothing else."

A lump grew in his throat. "It was to me." He told you. This wasn't going where he wanted it to.

"Then it was my mistake." You left, dragging the injured guy with you, and heading out the door.

"Fuck." He pushed through people once again, going to the bathroom and locking himself in.

His eyes could stop. Tears washed down his face, burning the skin that they ran down.

Perhaps it was his mistake. He knew you were a wild thing.

....

You awoke in a bed that was not your own. Your head ached a little even more so as started remembering the chaos of the night before.

There was a guy with blond, with roots that clearly did not match, hair. He was usually not your type. You must have been having too much fun to judge him on your appearance.

But you screwed up. Cook. He liked you, and you left him to sob in a sink.

College would be 'fun' . You doubted the two of you would meet in the nurse's office again.

Maybe he'd give you another opportunity. The sex was good, great even. But he was better, the way he made everything brighter by either cracking a joke or causing a feud.

A part of you wanted him to tame you.

#skins x reader #skins imagine #james cook x reader #jamescookimagine #skins gen 2 #cook x reader #cook #james cook

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theworldsoul · 3 years

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Sorry guys, I'm gonna vent Again, so if you don't want to read it just feel free to skip this post

Okay so basically we have a Gecko. Don't ask, that's another story for another time. My dad has grown fond of it, and I used to think he was cool until a specific day. On that say I fed him worms with a tweezer. When I picked them up, I could PHYSICALLY FEEL THEIR PAIN. I dont really know what happened there, but I physically felt their pain and i squeezed them. My dad said, "squeeze harder, do it by the head", and i tried it and i felt a jolt of pain... I told myself "you are just imagining the pain, its okay" but then when I looked back at the worm, squirming and struggling... I connected some dots in my brain and this hard realization came upon me, that I was causing this poor creature pain. I began to cry and my dad had to feed the gecko that day. Ever since then I havent interacted with the gecko because every time I do it freaks me out a bit. I dont really understand what happened that time but I want to forget about it before I go near the gecko again. I've been trying to get closer to him but I always freak out.

So today I was on my computer, right? Drinking a tea. Trying to feel peaceful. Then all of a sudden my dad is there, all happy with the gecko, and I go "oh hi!!!" Because I am under the impression that the gecko will stay ON HIS HAND. Of course I'm wrong. My dad encourages him to go onto the table to see me. I EXPECT the gecko to walk onto the table and towards me, but TO MY SURPRSISE, the gecko basically jumpscares me by suddenly jumping from his hand onto and nearby watterbottle. I jump a bit, startled, and I spill tea all over my computer, the table, and my sleeve. As I'm processing what happened I'm overtaken by fear and I begin to cry.

Of course I'm fine and I'm just overreacting, but I was scared. I wasnt hurt, my computer mousepad barely works now but I wasnt hurt. So why was I so scared of a little gecko? I dont know. So I'm crying and trying to clean up the mess of tea everywhere and my dad is mad at me for spilling my tea and he asks why I did that and I tell him that I was scared since it jumped so suddenly, yknow I wasnt expecting it. I dont remeber his exact words but it was soemthing about me being 15, like "oh well since you're 15 now you should grow the fuck up" basically. Then he left. Like???? I am literally trying to get my breathing back to a normal pace because I'm SCARED, I was just JUMPSCARED, and you get MAD AT ME??? YOUR CHILD IS FUCKING SCARED AND YOU JUST LEAVE THEM?? the whole time I was cleaning I could hear him in the other room talking to the gecko, all carefree and happy... while I did my best not to cry. Damn okay. It almost made me feel like I was below human.

Usually this wouldnt be such a big fucking deal, but I'm an emotional person. And also I notice that,,, whenever my sister is scared they lunge at the chance to help her feel safe again. It's like they hate me specifically.

I know I'm making a big deal out of something that is really not a big deal. Really all that happened was a little gecko jumped and I got scared. I'm overdoing it. But that's just how I am now. I really don't want to believe that I'm broken or anything, but fuck i think i genuinely am messed up if stupid shit like this makes me freak out... reminder that this all began with EMPATHIZING WITH A FUCKING MEALWORM. I'm jsut so fucking broken. And in the moments I was left alone to console myself as quietly as possible so as not to make anyone angry, I felt my body become possessed with another soul.

This happens sometimes, where I will sorta have the mindset of a child. I force it sometimes to cope, but other times it happens on it's own whenever I feel unloved or otherwise bad like this. I'm not too sure if this is a normal thing. But I describe it as possession. The fact that that event made me get possessed is kinda a big deal. Usually that only happens at REALLY BAD THINGS.

But this wasn't really bad... I'm just being sensitive and overdoing it.

Honestly my parents are right... I really do need to grow up. But I think I have something wrong with me, with my brain, because there are just so many things about this story that are so... wrong. Like, what sort of person freaks out and cries for an hour because they got jumpscared? What sort of person then has their body SWITCH SOULS because they feel like their parents dont love them? WHAT SORT OF PERSON EMPATHIZES WITH A WORM??? it's all so weird. Like, who knows, maybe my parents arent that bad, maybe I'm just like... weird. I'm totally overdoing this. I'm totally overdoing this. I'm making such a big deal out of it... but I cant help it. That's just my emotions.

Shit, I should really get a therapist. All the ones I've been to so far tell me my emotional reactions are totally normal but THIS DOESNT SEEM FUCKING NORMAL TO ME. I've overreacted to shit my whole life. It's not. Helpful.

On another note, I notice that my crying doesnt induce a "concern" reaction in my father. It induces an "anger" reaction. They arent bad people, I just... I'm beginning to think they really fucking hate me.

They have all the reaosn to, but a lot of those reasons are things that couldve been fixed early on if the adults around me cared about my feelings enough to try to sort them out. It's been fifteen years and now I'm fucked up. Irreversible. Just. So.. so fuckinf damaged. I dont think I'll ever be normal. And I hate ft. But it cant happen.

Soemtimes I think it was a bad idea to choose to live after the party. It was the perfect time to die and I told myself no, dont do it. It was... perfect. Calling to me. I think it was my destiny to die that day. I think that now I am cursed since I dodged my destiny.

I try not to think that way. I tell myself that I am going to change so much. I tell myself that my passion will be my strength. But the way my life is going, it really doesnt feel like I will become anything good.

I'm failing my classes. They KNOW about my soul shifting. I cry too much. All I ever do is draw STUPID FUCKING DRAWINGS and play STUPID FUCKING MUSIC and play fashion designer in my room stitching things up... fucking hell. They're right to hate me. I'm a failure. But they're also wrong to hate me. A lot of the things they dont like about me are things that are THEIR FAULT.

Man, I dont even know what to think anymore. All I really ever wanted was their love. But it's impossible for me to get it now, so I should just forget about it. I cant though. It plagues me. The thought that they hate me. It hurts me. And when its confirmed to me... i'm sorry. All I ever do is complain about the most mundane bullshit ever. My parents are proabbly actually good people I'm just overdoing it because I'm I'm proabbly mentally ill or soemthing. And I'm a failure anyways so I cant fucking blame them for not liking me that much anwyays. God, fifteen is very old. And I'm a boy. I hate to say it but they're right. Fuck, they're right. I cant be crying... I'm so oversensitive. But wait, why am I trying so hard to justify their ideas? ITS BECAUSE I FEEL GUILTY CONDEMNING THEIR ACTIONS. WHY DO I FEEL GUILTY. goddamn it...

I dont know how I'm gonna fix this though. I kinda wish my parents would treat me with the softness that I NEED, that my mind NEEDS and has needed for a while now, but I know that wont happen and really I'm just this overgrown child thing and oh fuck I wonder who's fault that is??? Cos it isn't all on me. Oh shit, now I'm scared. If I get a bad mark on my test my parents will freak out. I think I'm going to cry again. Fuck man, I try my hardest, it's just I'm literally defective. I cant do any better. I've been set up to fail anyways. Fuck. I just... I dont know, I wish things were different.

This is stupid and I'm being stupid and freaking out over one little thing. Fuck.

#sorry lol #im kinda overdoing it #feel free to tell me how dumb im being #because i know im #being irrational

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michaelreaderreblog · 5 years

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My Truemate pt18

AN; I know its been a very long time since I’ve posted anything. Well here it is, finally. I hope you all enjoy. All I did was edit and Im pretty happy how this part turned out. So hopefully tomorrow my wifi will be hooked up and posts will come regularly. Enjoy my loves

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To catch up you can go here >> My Truemate Series <<

Word Count: 2,491

When the both of you get to the diner and seated in a booth by the window is when the waitress comes to your table with a wide smile on her face.

“Hi, Im Dorothy and I will be your waitress for the afternoon” she says looking at you and extends her hand out to you.

You take her hand in a friendly gesture while nodding.

“Y/n this is Dorothy Baum, she has been a friend of Castiel since they were pups and still are” Michael introduces the both of you.

As she takes both of your order is when she still couldnt wipe the smile from her face.

She walks to the kitchen to put in the food order along to bring out your drinks.

“Um why is she so happy?” you ask looking away from her as she disappears into the kitchen.

“Beats me, usually she is so not like this. Actually I dont know how to describe her sometimes” he answers you and chuckles at the end of his comment.

“Ok then. Why have you brought me out for lunch? Isnt Anna going to be angry or something?” you ask not really wanting to know the answer.

“Well it seems as though she has met her true mate a couple of months ago and we mutually ended our relationship a few weeks ago” he answers never taking his eyes away from you.

You sit there stunned at the news and couldnt believe she actually let go of him but understood it all because true mates are involved.

“But if you didnt meet yours, than she met hers would she still be with you?” you ask from the distractions of your utter happiness but curious to know what he has to say.

“Well she mentioned if mine never came along then she would hold off her being truly happy with her true mate and still be with me. She didnt want me to be lonely if she still met hers because of the love she has for me” he answers in disbelief still.

You couldnt believe how much she would sacrifice for her true happiness if you never came along.

You were thankful you are around though and just thankful for Anna being incredibly selfless.

“Wow” is all that you could say.

When Dorothy comes back with drinks, she still has the smile on her face and winks over to Michael to give him a thumbs up.

The both of you talk about many things from books, music, tv shows, movies and basic interests.

“I know this is all sudden but um would you like to have dinner with me and my family at their house sometime this week?” he asks randomly.

“Uh yeah, I wouldnt call that sudden. It would be more like good timing” you simply answer back and having the relief of his family approving of the both of you.

“Good my parents would like to meet me and Castiel's mates so I guess he is going to ask Dean about that as well. Of course you can bring along Sam and Sarah considering they are mated already” Michael says with a smile on his face.

When Dorothy makes her back to your table with food in hands is when her attention is brought to the front door.

A Beta woman walks in and passes by your table.

“Oh good more Omega whores” the blonde woman says.

“Suzy that was uncalled for” Dorothy says

Michael was about to retort something back but you take your hand out for him to stay seated and he does.

“No, its ok. Since she is the only whore here. I can smell what? Two or three different Alpha's on you” you say while she turns around in her seat to look at you and tries to attack you but Dorothy has blocked her off.

“That is enough. OUT!!” Dorothy yells back to her while Suzy glares at her and walks to front door to exit the building.

“This wont be the last time you will see me. Next time you will be gone” she mutters walking out the door and as soon as she said that is when you got the feeling at the pit of your stomach was unsettling.

“Who the hell was that?” you ask looking between Michael and Dorothy.

“Suzy Roman, the sister of Dick Roman” Dorothy answers and as soon as she says Roman is when you went numb.

“Im sorry that had to happen, I know you handled yourself there but still shouldnt have to endure that” she says looking to you

“Does she have a thing for you why she had to be that way?” you ask bitterly to Michael and he raises his head to you.

“Yes but she is a Beta. I never wanted to date her or be near her all together. It was always her to force herself on me. Even while I was with Anna, she still did the same thing but never worked because she is a Roman. Those people are not respectful, they treat Omegas like toys and their belief system is traditional. Which they are traditionalists but that never went well with me” he answers you in the most sincere way without feeling angry talking about the Romans.

“I remember the one Christmas party Benny threw one year and Suzy came by as soon as she heard Michael was going to be there. Thats when she flirted with him in front of Anna. She tried taking him into one of the empty rooms but Anna had enough. Anna punched Suzy square in the face for her to leave him alone. I dont know how long she has tried to get with you. All she wanted was to get her hands on your business because of the shipments you get daily” Dorothy says and immediately the both of you look at her to what she said about him getting shipments every day.

“So what your saying is, if he had broken up with Anna in the first place. In the slightest way he was actually interested in her, she would get her hands on his business because of the shipments he gets everyday? Like why would she be interested in that?” you ask her to fully understand why she would be interested in his hardware business.

“Well its because the trucks that deliver the supplies he needs for his store. Especially since she joined her brothers business out of state, they only come back to make things not so obvious on what they are up to” she answers you quietly to make sure no other customer in the diner heard what she is elaborating on the Romans business deals.

“What are you incinuating?” Michael asks looking away from his food.

“After he made a business deal with a guy named Gordon Walker a few days ago. After my shift I went home to do research about this Walker guy because the way they were talking made me feel uneasy” she says as she cringes at the names and thoughts.

“Ok what turned up while researching?” Michael asks in curiosity.

“As it turns out this Walker guy is bad news, I mean he owns brotherls in Georgia and he owns one in Illinois” Dorothy answers Michael and you begin to feel really uneasy.

“Michael can you drive me home, Im beginning to feel sick” you ask him while feeling sick to your stomach

Michael’s anger is building the more he learns about Roman and the business he got himself into. He needed to do something to protect you and his brother. Thankfully he will have help. From his new brothers.

“Yes I can take you home. Dorothy print out those papers you found and give them to me. I want to show my father and if he is conspiring with the Romans than we have something” Michael says while trying to pay for the meal but Dorothy waves him off and nods in agreement for the information she has found while doing some research.

When Michael drives away from the diner is when he noticed how your scent has changed from mutual to fear, worry and anger. He reaches across the seat to place his hand on your knee to give a gentle squeeze.

“Hey I am not going to let them take you away from me or our family. We are going to protect you in any way that we can alright?” he asks looking away from the road for a brief moment to you and again back on the road again.

You sit there silent as you nod in agreement, you just wanted to go home to your brother you just hope that he was still home.

“Even if the whole thing involves Castiel I am going to protect him with everything I have” he adds while driving in the direction of your house.

He turned on the radio and Renegade by Styx comes on and soon your emotions are beginning to fade because of the music.

Michael has parked in the drive way and turned off the truck, he looks over to you and he can still sense you fear everything is soon about to change.

“Hey, look at me. I mean it when I say I am not going to let anyone take you away from me. We are going to fight tooth and nail to protect you in any way that we can” Michael says as he reaches over to place his hand under your chin to get a better look at him.

He gets out of the truck to walk around and open the door for you to head inside the house.

He looks around the yard to make sure nothing is out of the ordinary. He wanted to make sure no one is around to try and do anything to you if your brother wasnt home.

You unlock the door to open it

“Do you wanna come in?” you turn around to look at him as you ask before walking into the house.

“Yes I would like to come in” he simply answers with a smile upon his face and very surprised you asked him to stay.

“Dean, Im home” you yell for your older brother as the both of you walk into the house but there is no reply.

“I guess he went out with your brother for the afternoon. Do you mind if you stayed until he got back?” you ask without even thinking about asking the question but its out there in the open now and you werent going to take that back.

“Of course I can stay” he replies with a soft expression spread across his face and enters further into the house.

You lead him to the kitchen to make him more comfortable and thinking to make something to distract yourself from the information you and Michael found out.

He scents the air is changing and knew that you were feeling uncomfortable and he wished that none of this was happening but all he could do is try to settle your nerves.

He gets up from the chair to walk towards the radio thats on the counter. He turns it on to select the station that always works for him when he needs a distraction from everything else.

A song comes through the radio called Dont Give Up On Me by Solomon Burke.

He pulls you away from the cupboards and pulls you closer to him and he sways the both of you to the music as the lyrics come on.

“When I cant control something thats out of my element then I turn to music. To this station because some of the music just soothes everything away and I let the music carry me away” Michael says as he looks deep into your eyes, sways the both of you to the music playing in the back ground.

“Well thats one way to settle things. I would normally play the guitar. Until I stopped playing and finally picked it up again today. Well before you called anyways” You tell him with a slight smile an your face. He looks to you with complete adoration.

“I play the guitar as well and same thing. I just picked it up a few days ago and even wrote a song” he tells you while never looking away from you.

“I would love to hear the song, in fact would you play it for me now? I have the guitar in the living room” you ask in hopes he would play for you.

Neither of you notice that the song has ended as the both of you still dance to what ever song has come on the radio.

“Yeah I think I can play the song for you” he says with a smile on his face.

You pull away from him and lead him into the living room. You get the guitar from the corner of the living room hand it to him as he seats himself on the arm chair.

You sit close by on the couch, he tunes the guitar and when he knows its the way it should sound is when he started strumming.

You notice someone pulling into the garage and see its Dean and Castiel.

“Its called All My Only Dreams” Michael says before singing into the song

You fall in love with his singing as he moves into the chorus of the song.

Dean and Castiel walk further into the house and see its Michael who is singing.

Castiel has a bright smile on his face as he seats himself beside you, Dean sits on the other couch across from the both of you.

Michael is about to stop but notices his brother and his mate are loving the music from him and continues to play.

“My brother has never touched the guitar in so long. How did you manage to get him to play?” Cas asks as he leans in to whisper into your ear.

“I asked and he agreed” you simply answer with a fond smile.

When Michael finished is when Dean couldnt believe how talented Michael is for playing the guitar and having such an amazing singing voice.

“That was amazing” Dean says as he comes back into the living room and hands Michael a beer.

“Thanks, I was in the middle of playing when Anna came to my office and thats when we had the talk and mutually decided to end our relationship” he answers very honestly.

“I wrote the song for you y/n” he adds while he places the guitar away in the corner behind him.

Castiel has a bright smile on his face while Dean has the same.

You can feel that Dean is feeling rather content at what is in front of him and you can honestly tell that he is ready to let go of you.

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masosade · 5 years

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A Second Chance

“I would’ve dropped you off at Neil’s, but he’s been trying my patience lately. So why bother? I am sure someone will come pick you up eventually.” Alice smiled coldly as she watched formerly half-of Maso take his first shaky steps out of the grimdark Office. The body she had salvaged from another unfortunate Stellan - one whose soul had been reincarnated after his young demise – had been patched up and handed down.

"And remember! If you ever come back to cuase trouble in the grimdark Office again, your death will be an exceptionally long and painful one!" Alice chirped, her fingernails digging into Stellan's shoulder painfully. He jerked back, wincing, and averted his eyes.

“Perfect! I am glad we understand each other. Now, off you go, shoo!”

Stellan turned down the hallway. It was unfamiliar, looked like every other Office they’ve been to. With a sinking heart, he remembered he wouldn’t have Bradley here to guide him. He wished he would’ve paid more attention to their previous travels.

However, the things out there were most likely much better than what he was leaving behind. He felt Alice’s gaze linger a few seconds longer as he limped away, before she vanished back in her Office.

And then Stellan was alone.

His new body ached and stung from the stitches Jagger had put in after it had been rescued from a grave. Its eyes felt weak and its feet clumsily stumbled over each other. Either they had given him a second rate body to sit in, or he had to get used to having a body on his own for the first time in years.

It was ironic, actually. Stellan had dreamed of owning a very own body for himself on many occaisons, one where he could do what he want and go wherever, with no one else there to tell him what to do. Now he just felt cold and empty. He wished Bradley were here to fill the silence. When he reached out for that presence at the forefront of his mind, he felt nothing but hollow numbness, like tonguing a missing tooth.

Finally free and Stellan was fucking miserable.

He made his way down the hallways, taking random turns in whatever direction felt like it could lead him somewhere better. The Lounge sat empty, its seats covered in thick dust and the vending machine leaking with unidentifiable fluids. Not an abnormal sight to see, if rare, but some Offices shut down after their Stanleys and Narrators leave, or are killed, or kidnapped, or fall in love and move to another one, abandoning their original Offices.

It felt like the Universe took great joy in mocking Stellan, reminding him of how utterly alone he was. For the first time in years, he wanted to find a bottle that smelled as strongly as the juices drenching the Lounge’s carpets and drink it until he forgot everything but the burning in his throat. He had curbed his alcoholism nearly a decade prior, dreaming without it he could hold a good job, pull himself out of the mess his life had become and afford starting again in a better community.

Ever since he took the first step for change, accepting an office job promising to uphold a decent lifestyle, things haven’t stopped spiraling downwards.

‘Maybe I should’ve stayed a drunkard,’ Stellan thought bitterly as he focused on placing a foot in front of the other. Both the pain and the fogginess in his mind made it difficult to walk straight.

‘Ending up with liver poison and a friendly face per night would’ve been a much better fate. Hell, I could’ve met someone nice and spent an average life with them. But noo, I had to become a better person and start dreaming. And look where that got me.’

So wrapped up in his self loathing, Stellan didn’t notice another Stanley standing in the middle of the hallway until he nearly ran straight into him. In a flash, his thoughts had vanished and he couldn’t help stare.

The other Stanley...looked normal enough. He had the typical brown hair parted in the middle and messy with a morning look, warm brown eyes, and freckles scattered playfully on his nose. His employee outfit clean and nicely ironed; the nametag which read 'Hi! My name is Stanley!' looked new.

He looked normal but he didnt feel normal. This Office was abandoned, no doubt, so where had he come from? If he were a new Stanley, surely he would be frightened with the change of scenery and lack of directions.

Yet he simply stood there and smiled at Stellan, like they had agreed to meet up and Stanley was happy he came.

"Uhh?" Stellan tried and his vocal cords cringed at the unaccustomed strain. He coughed awkwardly and tried again, this time managing a hoarse mutter.

“H-hey, can you help me? I think I’m lost.”

"Of course I can help!" The Stanley said, his voice surprisingly gentle. He offered his hand for Stellan to take. "Come with me, I can take you somewhere safe!"

His eyes gleamed brightly in the dim hallway and for a moment Stellan wondered if he had stumbled upon another illusion of a Jonathan. Maybe it had been abandoned after the Narrator left and was never taken care of. But when Stellan hesitantly took his hand, it was warm and human to the touch. Not even Jonathan could imagine an illusion that felt so real.

The other Stanley beamed with joy and Stellan glanced away.

The Office looked even worse than Stellan had expected. Beyond the Lounge, as they headed back towards room 427, he noticed some rooms had their ceilings caved in, others with windows shattered. The left door was blocked completely with some filing cabinets but his mysterious guide didn't bat an eye at the havoc.

They turned into another hallway past room 420, and headed deeper. Stellan gave up trying to make sense of where they are going so he focused on the warm hand clutching his. It felt so foreign to be holding it and comforting at the same time.

“You’ve got a long journey behind you, don’t you?” The other Stanley said, sometime after they passed through another portal finally, into another Office. It smelled warm like a heated kitchen and no matter how hard Stellan looked, he couldnt find even one piece of stray paper on the ground.

“You dont know the half of it,” Stellan muttered. He tried to focus on walking, grateful for the hand clutching his. Without it he would’ve surely tripped over his own feet.

“I think I might,” Stanley said, smiling. Stellan shot him a questioning look, but he didn’t offer to elaborate.

“...did someone send you to get me?”

“This way.”

It’s been barely an hour, they couldn’t have known the exact moment I was released, could they?

Whoever they were. Countless of people around the Offices stuck their nosy noses in other people’s business. Stellan could name ten on the top of his head who may have had even the abandoned Offices bugged, grimdarks and the laboratories of one certain evil Narrator included.

Maybe it was desperation talking, or his inability to care about what pain could be further induced on him at this point, emotional or physical. But the other Stanley didnt feel evil. Even if he was mysterious, came out of nowhere and now held a tight grip to his hand as they wandered further into the hallway’s mazes.

If he wanted to hurt Stellan, he could have done it by now.

Unless he is taking you back to the laboratories, a tiny voice quipped.

I’m useless now. Bradley has the body, not me.

You’re not useless. Their whole experiments were centered around pain, werent they? Maybe they’re trying to see how far they can break you.

… then let them. I don’t give a shit anymore, and if they want to fuse me with more Bradleys. I’m tired. I don’t care.

Stanley stopped suddenly in front of a door. He turned back to Stellan and, while he never stopped smiling, it brightened when he looked at him.

“In here.” Stanley said.

“What…?” Stellan glanced at the door. “What’s in there?”

“Oh, didnt I already say? It’s a second chance for both of you.”

Both? Stellan stared in bewilderment and got a knowing smile as an answer.

Wait...

“...Bradley….Bradley is in there too?” How did he get past Alice and her security and her monsters to get him out? She was very clear in what she wanted to do with his other half and how she would maim anyone who tried to free Bradley of his ‘punishment’. Even if the ‘good guys’ wanted to save Bradley, it wouldnt make any sense. Stellan’s own alternate, one of those self proclaimed Office Heroes, even he took part in their capture.

“Life is more than hurting and getting hurt.” The other Stanley continued, infuriatingly vague. “We all have done things we regret, but it doesnt mean we need to suffer for the rest of our lives for it.”

He reached out and cupped his hands around Stellan’s face, and Stel startled at how warm they were. Ever snce Maso – no. Ever since the Office, the hands touching him had been cruel, painful. Cold fingers of scientists prodding, Jagger and his scalpels, agony created by Alice and his very own hands. And yet Stanley’s were so gentle, soft and merciful. Stellan leaned into the touch unconsciously.

His chest stung with an unwanted tightness.

“You’re going to be okay.” The Stanley said. “You and him. I promise.”

Stel was tempted to bite back with sarcasm, but it felt ungrateful to spoil his optimism with bitterness. Instead he hung his head, ashamed.

“We dont deserve a second chance,” he muttered. The hands withdrew from his face and even in the surprisingly warm Office air, Stel felt colder. He waited, but no reply came and when he looked up again, the hallway was empty.

The other Stanley had vanished.

Stellan sighed and turned back to the door. It looked so simple a few minutes ago and now it seemed more daunting, at the thought of seeing him again. Bradley might blame him for leaving him alone, but Stellan was more afraid he wouldn’t hesitate a second if Bradley offered him a chance to come back.

Anything was better than suffering alone. At least Bradley understood him.

Stellan gathered up his nerves and reached out for the door handle. It stuck, forcing him to rattle it a few times before he managed to get it open. His heart beat hard in his throat.

Now or never, he thought. The door swung open and Stellan stepped inside.

A single desk lamp struggled to light the room, though its glow couldn't reach past the cramped corner in which the cot sat. On the cot, wrapped in a few dozens blankets crouched a figure. Stellan couldn't make out its features so he hesitantly tried a,

"Bradley?"

The figure shuddered. As Stellan took another careful step inside, letting the door swing shut behind him, it shifted and a tired, tear stricken face peered out from underneath the sheets.

Stellan froze and he could feel his heart sink to his stomach.

That wasn’t his Bradley.

#drabble #x i cant do this anymore #dun dun duunnn #also this was started like two months ago #back then alice was still rather annoyed at neil for whatever reason and so she just kicked stel out #she did plan on letting neil have him (for a price ofc) but then something happened and she was too pissed at him to make that offer #well yknow he just trolled her #long post

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legion1993 · 5 years

Text

3 little words: i Love You

A/n: this is for @thisismysecrethappyplace for her challenge! *sorry this took so long girl! but here it is... im so sorry i hope this fits with all the prompts and details. hope you enjoy it.

pairing: Barry Allen x Female!reader

reader’s personal sitch: bullied by family “friends” co workers

male main is: overprotective

sitch between mains: love letters

dialogue (quote): “i was just kinda hoping that you’d… y’know… fall in love with me…”

summery: its a surprise….

masterlist

this is how your life changed, it went from one of daily turmoil and unpleasentries to one where you received your happily ever after. this is how it happened, this is how you discovered how much your best friend really cared about you.

your daily routine included:

waiting 10 minutes before getting out of bed to make sure your eyes were working first.

after getting out of bed, going to the bathroom doing your hair and smiling at yourself in the mirror.

then going to select your outfit, something comfortable yet pleasent on the eyes.

once that was done, do some of your daily mobile game stuff.

then walking out the door with your bag, shoes and sometimes a jacket.

then walking to work, of course with your music rocking away in your ears, you of course had already called Jitters coffee house placing the order for your morning coffee and of course your breakfast sandwich.

stopping in and picking it up, chatting a bit with the usual barista or whoever happened to be working at that particular time.

walking out of there carefully continuing your strut all the way to the CCPD, where for about 8 months now you had faithfully fulfilled the role of CSI, while your best friend Barry Allen was in acoma after being struck by lightning.

your only wish was to have your best friend/overprotective partner in crime solving back by your side cause without him there, work was hell for you.

for you were bullied and teased by pretty much everyone you worked with, everyone only bullied you if the captain or Barry or iris or Joe weren’t around. this time none of them were around, instead you were teased as soon as you walked into the station, you practically had to run through the police station, up the stairs to your’s and Barry’s lab.

you got in there placing the coffee and your sandwich on the nearby table you fell to the ground in tears… all you could do was wish that Barry was there, but it was getting easier to do this day by day, just involved alot of crying and lots of alcohol.

YN (to self): “Barry come back to me, please i need you!”

all you did was repeat that over and over… but someone else happened to stumble upon your little crying session… for now it was Iris West who happened to walk in your lab slowly….

thats of course when she heard what you were saying more clearly…

Iris: “YN…”

your head turned towards the friendly, familiar voice this made you come out of your on the floor stupper, get up and run into her familiar embrace. when she pulled back she started crying with a smile on her face.

YN: “Iris, i know why i’m crying but why are you crying?”

Iris: “it’s Barry, he’s awake!”

YN: “he is… when? for how long? how? is he okay? Where?”

Iris: “he is fine, he is at Star Labs still they are just making sure he is healthy before they let him come home. Barry wanted me to tell you that he will be back soon. now want some company while you start your work?”

YN: “i wouldnt mind, it would keep the other noses out of where they don’t belong.”

Iris: “people still giving you a hard time?”

You just nodded you couldnt even form words about it, see what had been happening was you were always seen as the burden, the over bearing know it all, seen as the one thing stopping everyone around you from being able to live their lives…

but when you started working at the CCPD after Barry fell into acoma your only thought was doing your job, however certain of Central city’s finest didnt think you had any business at all digging your nose into the cases as CCPD’s newest CSI…

it was always worse, like going to school with Barry people would tease you and him, teasing you guys by saying that you guys looked closer than friends… well as much as that would be a nice thought you were just grateful once you and Barry graduated high school.

but in the back of your mind, the only part of those memories that really stuck with you were the ones that included every single time Barry would drag you away from those bullies, everyone around you guys, sometimes it was almost like he was over protective of you.

Barry a few times got his ass kicked just because he tried to avenge your feelings, because he was the only one who was able to see through your facade, he could see that all the teasing and bullying was tearing you apart…

But nothing else was said apart from the new kind of glow about you, Iris of course was thrilled, but she could see that all the pain and sorrow you had been surrounded with when she walked in the lab had all gone away.

your main focus right then was on the fact that Barry was awake and alive and coming back soon.

Iris: “so what case are you working on?”

YN: “something brand new the Captain texted me that he was gonna leave samples of stuff on my desk… in a box…”

you pick up the box of evidence and smile. now you were in happy-ish work mode.

with your new outlook nothing could bring you down, well none except for them… in the ccpd there was a pair of men, they were the same jerks from when you and Barry were in high school. every single morning they walked well more like strided into your lab and began to bug you.

bully 1: “hey YN what do you call a lab coat with stains?“

bully 2: "oh look its not a lab coat its a bitch thinking she can survive in a world where she does not belong.”

Bully 1: “and look she has a friend with her… i guess its a two for one special today…”

Bully 2: “which one do you want?”

Iris came closer to you, grabbing the mop where you grabbed the broom…

Iris: “stay back or we will make you stay back…”

Bully 1: “well then make us… little bitches.”

those bullies just stood there and didnt move or anything but the second they started laughing both you and Iris set down the mop and the broom which in turn led to both you ladies walking up to those bullies and kicking them in the balls. then running off to talk to Captain Singh.

when you and Iris got to the stair case like 2 hallways away from the lab, Iris spotted her father and figured she would let you talk to captain singh alone.

Iris: “ill catch you later YN!”

Iris said once both you and her got down the stairs, it was your job to get into singhs office and tell him about the bullying that was going on within the precinct walls.

you approached his door and knocked before opening.

YN: “captain…”

Singh: “YN, shut the door & come in please have a seat…”

you closed the door walking over to the chair to sit down…

YN: “as you know since starting here i have developed a routine of mostly keeping to my work, or staying close to iris or joe or even you… well thats because alot of the precinct bullies and teases me… i mean lots of people do but the precinct does because of Barry… they think i only took a job here cause i wanted to be close to him.. thats not it at all… i love my job, its in fact one of the only jobs where i have people to shield me from the teasing and the bullying… captain i know that you havent heard about this breakthrough news yet, not many people know about it but Iris was here this morning she told me that Barry is awake and coming back soon! the people looking after him just want to run a few more tests on him to make sure he is healthy before they release him.”

singh: “well we will be pleased and honored to have Mr. Allen back at his post and i’ll be counting on you to show barry the new protocols and things. but as to the bullying issue, i’ll make a formal announcement to the entire precinct to promote the new anti bullying law… henceforth, anyone found guilty of bullying another officer or member of the ccpd shall immediately be stripped of their rank, gun, badge and be discharged… how does that sound?”

You nod your head now having the thought of Barry, Barry how the hell would he react to hearing that since he got struck by lightning you fell prey to the bullying going on under the nose of the captain.

Singh: “shall we go make this announcement to the entire precinct and after wards i’ll personally escort you back to your lab.”

YN: “thank you captain!”

you and singh walk out of his office, no one dared to touch you nor say anything cause of course you were walking to the staircase with the captain. at the top of the staircase you and Singh turned to face the rest of the precinct.

Singh: “attention everyone, its come to my attention very recently that there has been bullying happening within the walls of my precinct. THIS IS NOT ACCEPTABLE… henceforth anyone caught bullying another member of this precinct shall be stripped of their badge, their gun and be discharged from service to the CCPD. i want everyone to take note and report directly to me if there is any known bullying activity happening, names and badge numbers when you report it in. is that clear?”

everyone below agreed, then Singh turned away from you leading you back to your lab…

Singh: “YN, i hope you know that no one will ever be able to take your position away from you… when Barry returns we will make sure to install key card access for your guys safety… but i’ll let you go back to work, and i’ll even let you take off early today. i’m sure you probably want to stop by and see Barry… or go back to your apartment and prepare to bring him home.”

at that moment before you could even say anything your phone started buzzing, it was a video chat request from Barry.. your face lit up, you turned your phone to show the captain, who bowed out gracefully.

you went to sit at the desk full of boxes as you answered the call…

YN: “Barry…”

Barry: “YN, looks like you are having fun!”

YN: “your ok… ive been so worried!”

Barry could just chuckle watching as you show him a huge stack of papers.

Barry: “your worried, ive been worried. your surrounded by people who will stop at nothing to bully and torment you, who will stop at nothing but to make your life miserable. i just hope that you are gonna be able to survive till i can come back.”

YN: “when is that by the way? Iris said it would be a few days… please tell me it will be sooner than that.”

Barry: “ill be out as soon as i can! but tell me is the apartment still in tack… anyone else giving you a hard time?”

you turned your eyes towards the papers and instantly Barry knew that something was wrong…

Barry: “is it the same idiots from high school.?”

thats when you broke down… you started crying… Barry’s only regret was that he couldnt be there to comfort you.

Barry: “as soon as i get out of this doctor office, i’ll come and i’ll save you. i promise!”

YN (sobbing): “i hope i’ll survive, the captain knows ive been getting bullied. i just hope that you are gonna be out of there soon! i really miss my roommate/best friend!”

Barry: “i miss you too… i know its been a rough few months, i also know you spent quite a few nights here right beside me, so thank you… it helped me to sub consciously keep fighting cause i knew i had something precious to come back too…”

YN: “please come back soon. i can’t express into enough words how much i miss having you around. this lab is too big for just one person. besides this work would go alot faster with another person.”

Barry laughed hearing you try to sweet talk him into coming back early.

Barry: “well what are you working on now? cataloging or closing?”

YN: “cataloging, and its annoying cause Singh won’t ease up on how much work he is giving me… i have currently several boxes full of different cases, but alot of these have the csi listed as you, are signed with your signature, i haven’t been able to think about anything else since you got struck by lightning, i have forgotten to clean the apartment most days so now i’ve hired a maid service for us, for our apartment, i know there is nothing else i can possibly say right now that will make you come back any faster but i will say this, when you get back there will be alot of hugs & lots of dancing in the rain. like we did the night of our high school graduation.”

Barry: “lots of dancing in the rain definately. but i gotta go unfortunately the doctor wants to run more tests… physical tests but i’ll be out soon and then i’ll give you the biggest hug ever.”

You blew a kiss into the phone and watched the screen go black. the call ended, the overwhelming sense of happiness that you were feeling at that moment, was a lot better than what you had been feeling when you had been by yourself this morning.

you finished cataloging 3 more files of paper and then made the effort to go check in with the captain before you left for the day. it was twilight when you left the station.

of course you had taken your time with cataloging you might have even cataloged a bit more than you had hoped to do, but there was no shortage of good thoughts on your mind.

now there had been alot of things on your mind before hand, you had so much more on your mind now. Barry was gonna be so surprised when he got back home. of course however when Barry would finally come home would be the first time in forever that you might actually want to tell him of your feelings or vise versa.

you stopped to pick up some dinner but you couldnt keep your mind off the fact that Barry would soon be back by your side where he belonged.

meanwhile at star labs…

Barry: “how many more tests do we have to run? honestly i got a life to get back too.”

Caitlin: “you will be allowed to leave as soon as you perfect your control of your super speed. which if you complete this next simulation, you will hopefully have full control and be back home by tomorrow morning.”

Barry: “ugh, i have a girl that ive been in love with since we were in school together and i can’t survive the rest of my life, if i never have the courage to tell her how i really feel. look she has been bullied since we were in high school by these 2 idiots who now work in the ccpd. i hate the thought of her facing each day working with those 2 goons.”

Caitlin could only do so much more, so after 4 more hours of testing Barry’s abilities and vitals she realized that no matter what test she put him through, within those 4 hours he worked even harder and gained serious amounts of control over his abilities.

Caitlin: “we are just about ready to send you home but there is something else that we would like you to do, we think you should become a hero…”

Barry: “i’ll think about it now can i please…”

thats when the star labs alarm went off… heading to the cortex, barry and caitlin met up with wells and cisco to find out the cause of the alarm. on the monitor it showed a dark barely lit alley with what looked to be a woman leaning scared against the wall with about 6 guys.

Cisco: “im just about to pull up the audio footage…”

as soon as cisco pulled up the audio Barry took off in a black hoodie and red lightning.

in the alley

YN: “stay back leave me alone, one push of a button and this alley would be swarming with cops.”

attacker 1: “well then do it, it will make this more of a party…”

Attacker 3: “let see what she is wearing under neath that coat!”

but it was like a blur, a red, yellow blur of lightning a figure knocking away those goons before they could surround you anymore. but you hadnt time to thank this blur before he disappeared… for the rest of your walk home, there wasnt any noise that you heard on that walk home that didn’t make you shake…

quarter way from your apartment

it wasn’t till you arrived on the home stretch that a familiar shadow was sitting on the steps of your building’s entry way.

Barry: “hey…”

Your brain didnt register the voice at first till their form stood and moved towards you, forcing you to stop dead in your tracks… your body already quivering, made your knees buckle from beneath you right then and there you dropped to your knees in fear…

Barry having seen this, knowing what you went through knowing also that he couldnt say anything about what happened nor him saving you. but instead only walked a bit more till he was half visible in the street light.

you hadn’t stopped watching his form but yet still now standing right there, now under the street light your eyes now registered the voice to the figure now standing a few feet away.

YN: “Barry…”

you got up off the ground immediately and ran straight for his embrace, realizing that you were now starting to spout tears of joy…

Barry: “shh shh its okay…”

YN: “your home... but i thought...”

Barry: “they let me go early... so i got a taxi here and ive been waiting here for you to come home ever since...”

you pulled back to look at him and then went to the front door and opened it, letting both of you inside... Barry & you didn’t stop starring at eachother the entire way inside, it was nerve wrecking for both of you...

once in the apartment you had to turn away from Barry for a moment ashamed of the strewn case files everywhere..

Barry: “its like i never left... case files everywhere, take out on the counter.. dishes on the drying mat... let me guess the bed isnt made and the laundry is waiting to be folded...”

YN: “is it that obvious...”

Barry nodded but instantly went to work, putting trash in the trash and dishes in the cupboard... it really was like he never left... you removed your coat and your heels taking a sigh of relief... then going over to a small gift box with every single letter you had written for Barry since he had got struck by lightning.

Barry: “what ya got there...”

you brought the box over to Barry and handed it to him...

YN: “i wrote you a letter one for every single day you were gone... they contain my thoughts, feelings, and wishes... also they tell you what happened while you were well in coma... just keep an open mind when you read them... im gonna go put on a face mask and get into something less work related... then maybe you can help me sort through these case files.”

Barry: “of course... i cant even imagine what kind of torment you went through when i was gone...”

You instantlly thought about what happened many numerous times, being sexualized and bullied and teased and pushed around. it didnt make being without barry easy but all you could do was tough it up...

YN: “it was torture... and today wasnt much better i was chased and cornered in an alley on the way home, i was almost raped...”

you say as your walking towards the bedroom, upon hearing this though barry follows in suit, bringing his laundry bag and places it in the pile by the door. your sitting on the bed when he finally catches up to you.

Barry: “what do you mean you almost got raped tonight?”

YN: “i mean i was walking home and i almost got raped in an alley a couple blocks away... but a red lightning blur saved me... i was able to escape... but im shaken beyond belief.”

Barry: “you are gonna be okay, now just relax... im not going anywhere...”

Barry got out of his sweater and took off his socks coming up behind you, he pulls you into his embrace and you sob uncontrollably against his chest, knowing that now he was home and you could finally rest easy.

both you and Barry now relaxing into a calm environment Barry looks at the box that he had put on his side of the bed... the box with all the letters you had written him... so with his free hand he opens the box, and begins to read the first letter...

YN (letter 1): “Barry, its been literally 24 hours since you got struck by lightning... i’m slowly getting into a different routine... one that right now till you wake up or even if you wake up.. ugh barry there are alot of things i wish i could have had the courage to tell you before but i guess telling you like this is better than not telling you at all... i love you Barry Allen... those bullies in school and at the precinct they were right to call us bf/gf... i know that you probably won’t feel the same but i hope this also doesn’t change our friendship... i really miss you... oh ya i did say precinct, Singh gave me a job as temp csi... just until we know more about whether or not you wake up...i hope you wake up soon... its gonna be torture without you around. love YN.”

Barry set that one aside to open the next one...

YN (letter 2): “Barry, i cant take this... today i started a filing system of all the case files and stuff. i was handed a bunch of boxes and things today... of old cases and forensics that you had aparently signed off on... i still haven’t brought myself the courage to come see you yet... i know it may be foolish but i know if i come by i’ll cry. i cant do that... i’ve cried enough to last a life time between all the bullying and you being comatose, im trying to find a safe haven in anything familiar. anyway hope you come home soon. love YN.”

thats when Barry decided to stop reading for the night... he closed the box and put it on his nightstand. cuddling up still holding you he too fell into a deep slumber.

the next morning

he woke as you did to the sound of an obnoxious buzzing, you knew it was your phone and thus moved to grab it off your nightstand, you answered it putting it on speaker.

YN: “yeah...”

Singh: “there is a case its fresh, and ripe still can you come down?”

YN: “yeah i can text me the address.”

thats when you hung up the call, knowing that your own demise would be showing up to work knowing that barry was home and not there with you... now Barry having heard your conversation with singh got up and started getting into a clean shirt and packing his csi bag as well as yours.

YN: “Barry what are you doing?”

Barry: “whats it look like.... im coming with you...”

You got up going behind the changing cover grabbing your capris and your fave halter with the built in bra...

YN: “dont you want to take it easy? i mean you only just spent your first night back last night...”

Barry: “when have you ever known me to take it easy?”

You stopped for a moment amidst putting on your shirt...

YN: “never... but thats not the point you should relax...”

Barry: “no what i need to do is come with you and show those bullies that you are not to be messed with...”

you were grateful to barry for that, but you still were concerned... you finished getting dressed and came out from the cover going over to Barry giving him a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

YN: “thank you for being so concerned for me... ill be ready to go in a few minutes...”

you went into the bathroom and started on your hair, like normal Barry came in behind you after you finished brushing the hair, Barry began to braid your hair, for he knew it was difficult with such long hair to self braid, so for as long as you could remember.

Barry: “almost ready to go?”

you pulled out your phone and opened the jitters app and this time ordered 2 cappuccinos with extra whip & Chocolate drizzle... you knew the order would be ready by the time you guys got there...

you put on your shoes and smiled wide as arm in arm you exited the apartment with Barry. it made you feel normal once more. walking down the street towards jitters, Barry walking in stride with you inside jitters everyone there was impressed. they started clapping.

the waitress handed you and Barry the cappuccinos and that when your phone dinged it was Singh with the address. you showed it to Barry who walked ahead of you to open the door of Jitters and walk out the door with you.

Barry: “lets go and see this crime scene... its just up the block...”

approaching the crime scene, you and Barry flashed your badges. officers starred at you guys, some of them clapped and welcomed Barry back...

Singh: “so this is your daily surprise! welcome back Barry!”

Barry: “than you Captain... for also looking after YN while i was gone... i know i have alot to make up for but i hope i can start by helping sweep the area for clues.”

Singh: “well then ill leave my 2 best csi’s to their jobs and ill expet a detailed report on your findings...”

you and barry nod, beginning to survey the scene. you went after prints and a few other things. Barry took photos of the scene, there was alot of blood and torn off limbs.

YN: “whatever did this must have enjoyed themselves?”

Barry: “must have but wha...”

Barry kneels down and sighs...

Barry: “YN come here and bring gloves with sample collectors.”

you brought over the gloves and sample collectors, but saw the horror before your eyes at what appeared to be shedded skin. you and Barry decided to contain as much of it as possible, for testing and further investigation.

YN: “it looks like someone shed this like a snake...”

Barry: “it does but lets collect all the other evidence and head to the lab, we need to start on this ASAP!”

YN: “i cant wait to start this with you... i look forward to it. lets go... wait till you see the new filing system that ive done with the lab...”

Barry smiles walking back and grabbing both of your bags and walking back to you grabbing both your pairs of gloves and throwing them in the trash both yo and barry get a heroes escort back to the station.

walking inside you felt safe, those bullies who had bullied you day in and day out didnt dare to bother you then for it became immediately clear that they wouldnt be able to touch you.

you led Barry up the stairs to the lab so familiar to both of you now. it was Barry who spoke about how the lab looked.

Barry: “i assume that you made these organizational changes cause it would be easier for us!”

YN: “yep, is that ok?”

Barry: “yep, now lets start the analysis!”

you and barry working together analyzing evidence something you had only dreamed about for the passed 9 months. but something didnt seem right, something seemed off...

you went over to the computer while barry was getting lunch and accessed the street cam from the alley where you were attacked, you cut the clip of who or whatever saved you but something was off, you didnt know what...

Barry came back with food and saw you looking at the blur photo, he then realized that if something wasnt said soon, you were gonna probably never believe him...

this however is when things fell apart... the entire lab went dark, Barry tripped over a chair dropping your shared lunch, then a figure with a slight glow about them appeared behind you and whisked you out of the lab with you screaming and kicking but it didnt do any good.

this left Barry very distraught, this was what he was afraid of... he used his speed to leave out of the fire escape and ran to star labs.

Barry: “you guys think i should be a hero well here is my chance to find out if i can be one... my friend, the one i spoke to on the phone, the one that i saved from being raped in that alley, the one that wrote me a letter for every single day i was in acoma, the one who in her first letter admitted she loved me, she just got kidnapped from our work, from our office, i need to get her back...”

Cisco: “i have just the thing that you can use to conceal your identity to save your girl.”

cisco pressed a button and revealed a red suit with a lightning bolt logo.

Cisco: “it will not burn nor crisp, it will move with you and allow your electrical current through your body, as well as communicate with us here, and it will also..”

Caitlyn: “it will also allow us to monitor your vitals and health in battle, as well as it gives us the ability to shock resuscitate you should anything happen to knock you unconscious.”

Wells: “we will be right here if you need us mr allen. Now Run Barry Run!”

Barry runs in a flash of red and yellow lightning to the suit and back out the door. Cisco pinged your location sending it to Barry, who runs faster finding that he can’t help but feel somewhat responsible for this.

Barry: “hold on YN im coming.”

meanwhile

in an abandoned werehouse near the docks you were being dangled by a chain over a big cylinder of some sort of stinky liquid. one of the bullies from the precinct was standing above you he was glowing, then he stepped into the light.

YN: “you killed those people, you shedded your skin... what the hell do you want?”

Carl: “well thats simple, i want to mate... see did you know that a reptile needs to mate every spring and sometimes its with their own offspring... well your not my offspring but you will do for the mating ritual, just have to make you like me first.”

you screamed as he dove toward you and shredded your capri’s and then dove into the stinky liquid below. you were horrified you tried to climb the chain but it didnt work, it was about 10 minutes later when the bully Carl came out of the liquid.

Carl walked off the platform and over to the control panel he swings the chain probably making himself hard on hearing you scream, but that was also the moment when he grabbed you mid swing and pinned you to the platform.

at that moment something else came onto the werehouse property... or rather someone, someone who just so happened to hear you scream...

Flash: “hey lizard breath let her go...”

Carl: “why should i take orders from a man dressed in spandex?”

Flash: “first, of all its leather and second, thats not how you treat a lady.”

carl just went back to roaming his hands along your body and all Barry could see was red, he took a risk and ran up the ladder and bowled into carl, though doing that caused you to go flying.

the chain came loose you were starting to slowly descend towards the liquid below. this cause another scream to leave your mouth, Barry upon hearing this takes a running leap of faith, catching you mid air he lands by the entrance holding you in his arms.

Flash: “are you alright?”

YN: “i knew you would come for me... yes im okay... a little disoriented but am okay... but find him, he cannot be allowed to escape justice.”

Flash: “dont worry he wont...”

flash sets you down on your feet and speeds back inside, you hear a couple distorted grunts and then a woosh comes passed you. suddenly the same blur that saved you from the alley way the other night was now standing right in front of you.

Flash: “ive sent a anonymous call to the ccpd, they are dispatching some officeers to collect him when they do they will take him to Belle Reeve cause clearly he needs psychological and physical attention. but ccpd will be here soon, is there some place i can take you?”

YN: “i left my stuff in my lab back at ccpd, there is a fire exit at the back of the building, you can get in through there, its on the second floor. plus my csi partner and best friend will be worried about me, he is a little over protective, you know he has that over protective demenor that just makes me swoon whenever he is around. i’m so sorry you probably dont want to hear about this.”

Flash: “its okay, i kinda know how you feel, but lets get you back to your lab... can i carry you?”

You nod your head feeling strange but yet it didnt occur to yoou till your vision started to blur... Barry noticed it right away his visible features flooding with concern.

Flash: “hold on, miss, miss...”

Barry ran all the way to Central City General, where he proceeded to run you inside placing you in the care of some nurses he carefully but yet a bit quickly explained what happened. you had your ID in your shirt and you happened to still have your badge around your neck...

they knew exactly who you were... the nurses took charge of you, Barry however left his ccell number with them as an emergency contact for her... he then went and ran back to star labs where he dropped off the suit and ran back to ccpd...

Singh walked in to find Barry lying on the floor unconcious... Barry having only been like that a few moments woke up slowly to singh shaking him gently...

Barry: “captain YN was taken it was carl and...”

Singh: “we know we have carl in custody who keeps raving on about a red and yellow blur rescuing YN...”

thats of course when Barry’s phone rang...

Barry: “Barry Allen...”

Nurse 1: “Mr Allen My Name is Niomi, i am calling from Centra City General in regards to a YN YLN she was brought in by a guy in a red leather suit anyway she has been tested for a positive for snake venom... we are working on a cure, but can you come down?”

Barry having heard this, his face swarmed with panic flooding his initial facials...

Barry: “oh god ill be there as quickly as i can... does she need anything?”

Niomi: “we got her a change of clothes from the gift shop on the house, but we do need to see her medical card and verify a few things... but mostly i think she would love it if you were here.”

Barry: “ill be there soon, my police captain is coming as well. thank you.”

Barry and Singh were out the door faster than a speeding bullet, Singh used the siren to bypass all the evening traffic, arriving at the hospital they parked and ran inside.

Naiomi instantly recognized the worried look on Barry’s face.

Naomi: “you must be barry...”

Barry: “where is she? ill verify anything that needs, ill sign whatever needs just let me see her please...”

Singh placed a hand on Barry’s shoulder and smiled lightly...

Singh: “ill verify and sign papers and information for YN, Barry you should be at her side...”

Barry: “thank you captain.”

Singh walks up to the desk, while Barry is led by Naomi to the room where you were solely placed. Barry’s expression was written clear on his face, he was seeing you the way you had probably seen him when he fell into coma.

Barry: “please tell me what you guys can do to fix this?”

Naomi: “We are mixing more of the cure as we speak, the cdc is set up here already we had a few other cases like YN so we have been manufacturing it all day... its only a few hours away from being done. not to worry Barry, we willl do everything in our power to cure her, so you can tell her you love her..”

Barry looked at Naomi shocked...

Barry: “how did you...?”

Naomi: “simple ive seen enough people with pent up feelings of love to know the look when i see it... believe me mr Allen she is gonna be fine.”

Barry: “am i allowed to crawl into the bed and cuddle her in my lap, i wont knock out any of the cords i just want to hold her...”

Naomi: “come remove your shoes and place them on the chair with your coat and bag, ill help you get comfortable holding her so we can still have access to her IV for administering the cure.”

Barry did as asked, crawling into the bed holding you as he did, Naomi placed a blanket over both of you and turned the light on low. she left the room, Barry placed his phone on the table beside the bed.

Barry: “im so sorry YN... i should have used my abilities, you shouldnt have been taken, not when i know i could have saved you. come on YN wake up, baby...”

Barry was lost in holding you close that he soon lost track of time, for a few short hours had passed before Naomi came into the room, Barry looked up his eyes blood shot from his having been crying. Naomi walked over to the IV Bag and replaced the bag and nodded at Barry whose eyes lit up.

Barry: “thats the...”

Naomi: “yes thats the cure. we will know if it worked within a few hours, try to get some rest Barry, when she wakes she will tell you i’m sure.”

Barry watched Naomi leave the room and gently leaned down to kiss your forehead...

Barry: “please come back to me, i love you...”

Barry knew how to tell if you were awake, he leaned the bed back almost all the way before he allowed sleep to over take him. it had once more been several hours before Barry was felt you move in his arms.

you had been awake for a little bit but didnt move till now cause you wanted to enjoy being in Barry’s grasp.

Barry: “your awake!”

YN: “shhh not so loud, ive got a bit of a headache.”

Barry kissed your forehead gently and you stayed in his arm till you moved slightly and felt the iv start to sting... Barry helped you press the call button and Naomi came in...

Naomi: “YN glad to see your awake, i’m Naomi ive been looking after you. what can i do for you?”

YN: “im pretty sure the iv isnt supposed to be stinging is it?”

Naomi comes over to take a look...

Naomi: “it got a little out of place not to worry ill take care of that... you both can continue your little conversation...”

Barry and you watched Naomi fix your iv and put a new bag on before she left, you had been able to tell for a while now that Barry had something to tell you...

YN: “spill Barry... what is it that you want to tell me?”

Barry: “what do you remember about what happened to you?”

you had to think about it while leaning your head closer to Barry’s chest, the flashes of last nights events came rushing back at you.

YN: “carl was the shedding monster, he scratched me, he tried to rape me... Barry it was awful...”

Barry: “anything else..?”

YN: “yes there was a man, in red, with lightning speed, he saved me before i could hit the acid or whatever was in that container. he had this look about him like he knew me... like he was somewhat protective of me... but of course no where near as protective as you are Barry. why do you ask?”

Barry: “what if i told you that when i got struck by lightning it changed me...”

you looked up at Barry almost flooded with concern before you realized that ya it wouldnt surprise you if it did.

YN: “Barry any traumatic experience such as getting poisoned or getting struck by lightning changes a person drastically...”

Barry breathed in slightly before speaking again.

Barry: “what if i told you that getting struck by lightning it gave me abilities... ones that would allow me to lets say save you from getting raped in an alleyway, or from getting turned into snake woman...”

YN: “what if i said that i heard what you said last night...”

Barry: “you heard me say what...”

YN: “that you should have used your abilities, that i shouldnt have been taken, i heard you call me baby, i also heard you say 3 more words to me. but before we get into that... why wouldnt you have told me that you were the person who saved me right off the hop...”

Barry: “cause i didnt know if it would change how you felt about me. i read 2 of your letters the night i came home. i know how you feel about me... for many years YN ive stood by your side as your best friend and i always well, i was just kinda hoping that you’d... well ya know... fall in love with me...”

you smile and reach up with your not iv’d arm and cup Barry’s face... the glow in his eyes was only ever seen one other time before this moment by you, that was the night of your guys high school graduation where you both shared a drunken quiet moment in the school garden.

anyway long story short, Barry leaned into your touch and smiled.

Barry: “i love you YN...”

the kissing began quite quickly...

#barry allen x reader #the flash #barry allen is the flash

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drkoestersmithrpg · 4 years

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The Last Chapter Of Addict

Tony took Peter to bed, of course. He performed well. He could tell – Peter was very expressive with signs, moans, gasps and little yelps and a mouth that seemed to constantly be trying to form words, but failing.

Tony was silent, of course.

Silence was safer.

It was an odd thought he had after it was over, after they had showered and were snuggled in to sleep. “Silence is safer,” his brain told him.

“If you opened your mouth, gods only know what you might say.”

Because he was getting it. It was only the first night of their Three-Day-Weekend-Only-Breaking-For-Food-And-Homework-Sexathon, but it was the first night that he Got It.

“If you opened your mouth, gods only know what you might say.”

Laying in his bed, freshly showered, holding a freshly showered (and blissfully nude) Peter asleep in his arms, he got it. He was willing to say anything, absolutely anything, to keep this boy with him. Including proposing marriage.

He didn’t get up, right at that moment. He lay awake, the boy snuggled into the crook of his arm, his own heart pounding. Peter was dozing but not quite asleep yet. He had a fistful of Tony’s pajama shirt in his hand, held close to his face like a child. He started and twitched, sometimes mumbled, sometimes argued, in his sleep. Tony watched in fascination, waiting, timing his escape.

Finally he couldn’t take it any longer – he worked his pajama shirt out of Peter’s hand and slipped away, mumbling something about tinkering in the lab. Peter wouldn’t be surprised if he woke up alone.

Tony often made his escape this way.

Of course on those occasions he had really gone to tinker in the lab, tonight he went straight to the liquor cabinet.

He poured himself a glass, then picked the whole bottle and took it with him. He sat alone next to the window and glared down upon New York City, and drank.

“Drinking alone is a sign of alcoholism,” he joked to himself in the silent room. He didn’t laugh at the joke.

He tried to think about something, anything, to get his mind off what he was thinking about now. He tried x and y and z [ask von for tech] but his mind would stay on tech. As per usual, his mind was on Peter.

His brain went back to his regular screensaver fantasy, the one he had been going over obsessively lately, which mainly consisted of various sex acts he had experience with that he could introduce to Peter in hopes to keep his interest. Now that they actually had time for said sex acts Tony was beginning to realize the point was moot. Tony had made it clear he was ready to offer anything, but Peter had also made it clear that he was only interested in the standard – Tony on top, Tony inside him, Tony’s head wrapped up in his arms (not that Tony was complaining. The noises that boy made were so sweet.)

Which produced an entirely new problem – if Peter wasn’t interested in new and exciting sexacts, what the hell did Tony have to offer? (Tony had SUGGESTED one specific other thing, but Peter had given him a hard pass. That hurt, but then again, who was he to demand anything? He was demanding enough as it is.)

“You’re screwed, Stark. You’re so fucking screwed,” Tony mumbled to himself. He glared at the amber liquid in his hand.

He was so definitely, thoroughly and completely screwed.

Since the moment he first felt Peter’s cock growing hard in his mouth, he knew.

All the signs were there. The obsessive circular thinking. The dreams. The tension that began to build in his body when he realized how long it had been since had felt it, and how long it had been since he would feel it again. And the reaching, the constant reaching for the thing that would numb the need/kill the time until he could taste it again.

But illicit substances were out – Peter disapproved. (Besides, he was an Avenger now, whatever that meant.) As were other cocks- he had promised Peter that it was the “person attached to the cock” that he wanted, and he was loath to go back on that promise now.

“ -the thing he bragged about in WHICH - “ he had bragged absurdly on the day he gave peter the roses, and he wished to god he hadn’t, because what he had voiced it outloud he realized how easy it would be. They wouldn’t be Peter, of course, [???just like alcohol wasn’t cocaine???] but one thing could ease the tension until he arrived at the other thing. But of course he had BRAGGED THAT HE WOULDNT DO THAT so now, of naturally, he couldn’t.

Besides keeping cocks around at work to suck on during the day would just be admitting he had a problem, and he most certainly was not prepared to admit he had a problem.

But he most certainly had a problem.

He had, after all these years, managed to develop a sex addiction.

And Peter – ah god – Peter was so incredibly accommodating. Actually changing his schedule and altering his daily life to accommodate Tony’s absurd demands. The boy was flattered by the attention – for now – but it seemed obvious that he wasn’t going to be flattered forever. He had already implied that Tony was more interested in the bodypart than the person and while the 12 dozen roses had seemed to work for the moment…..

….. the time would come where there wouldn’t be enough roses to keep the boy around.

No matter what he did, this was doomed to failure.

He drained the glass and poured himself another, brooding.

Why was Peter so much different than any other man?

With other men there had always been a time before the fear came – a limerence period with nothing but peace and the joy of new discovery. Before the fears came. Before the realization that one (usually the other guy) wanted a long haul and the other (usually Tony) very much did not. But with Peter that limeremnce (???) never happened – this had STARTED in fear. STARTED knowing this was all painfully temporary, a momentary cease-fire in the verbal war, a tender cease-fire that was just long enough to remove clothing and exchange bodily fluids.

Granted, the cease-fire had been extended, far longer than Tony had ever imagined, but that didn’t make it anything other than it was. Every minute, every day, every sexual encounter was obviously the last. That was the way cease-fires worked. There was no lasting treaty, here.

Someday, Peter was going to realize he had accidentally fallen into bed with Tony Stark and run for his life.

“Goddammit,” Tony said out loud to his drink. His drink didn’t answer. He lived so much in fear of that day he was almost eager for it to happen. When it happened, it would be over, and he could recover.

Which was different from any of his other addictions – the drugs, the alcohol, the suits. Each one seemed like they could easily last forever – actually it had appeared the suits WOULD have lasted forever – and maybe they would have, if it weren’t for Peter.

Peter.

Peter, who tasted like light. (Jesus Christ, had he really said that out loud? This is why talking during sex was a bad idea.) That had been one secret he was ready to take to his grave, but dammit the boy didn’t taste normal at all. The New York fans like to claim he had ‘radioactive blood’ and Tony could attest that other bodily fluids might be radioactive too. Christ he was probably giving himself cancer.

“Not that it matters,” he muttered to himself as he downed his drink and started in on its brother.

He really was addicted to pain, just like his ex-wife said.

And the kid was catching on, that much was certain. Had pointed out that if Tony really wanted to taste him he could catch the taste on his tongue, not the back of his throat. Smart kid. But the kid didn’t know that the alcoholic can dream all day about the taste of scotch, only to chug it back too fast to enjoy the taste.

And Tony, the addict, could NOT get Peter into his mouth without taking the boy down into his throat.

“Because no one will ever blow you the way I do, kid,” he muttered to himself, and that much, at least, was true. He had that, at least, as a decent argument for when the kid decided to bail. At least, as long as the kid never got around to asking why Tony was so damn good at this…..

“I just won’t answer,” he argued with himself. He had gotten GOOD at not talking. He was amazed at how easily it had been for Peter to shut him when no one else could, of course, he never needed anybody the way he needed Peter. And if he wanted to be with Peter, he had to keep his damn mouth shut.

“Except when I’m sucking Babyboy’s cock,” he joked humorously.

Or when you’re texting.

Tony frowned at the internal voice. Peter didn’t complain about the texting (except when he did.) And Tony had been sparse with the texting, using it only when he flat out couldn’t take it anymore. When he wasn’t desperate, he left Peter alone, knowing how busy the boy was. Even when Peter texted him about mundane things Tony kept his replies short and to the point – Peter was an extremely busy boy, and Tony was proud he could give Peter space.

But then again…

Growling in frustration Tony stood up to find his phone. He wobbled a bit (wait how many drinks did he just have?) but found it fairly quickly. With shaking hands he brought up Peter’s screen…..

What ya doin’ pretty baby?

Letting those pretty college boys suck your sweet cock?

I can part your physics. ; )

What do you expect from me? I need my fix.

Beads of sweat formed on his forehead and Tony read the texts like a blackout drunk read his crimes in the daily paper. ‘Letting those pretty college boys suck your sweet cock?’ No wonder the boy was in a constant state of irritated at him. ‘I can part your physics’ was embarrassingly sophomoric but at least it was on purpose. He often aimed for the embarrassingly sophomoric. Tony was safe as long as Peter was only rolling his eyes. It was when Peter was angry and shouting that his chest began to tighten.

Tony moaned as he read the texts. He knew (and hated) the man who had sent them. Normally Tony would think and rethink, type and retype, a single text over and over again until the majority of his texts would never see the light of day. Then (just like an alcoholic deliberately getting blackout drunk) he just hitting send as fast as he could type. But wasn’t that typical Tony? Pushing people away before they could leave him. Before they could run from him.

He started scrolling backward, looking and the other texts, the careful texts, the ones he had had stressed appropriately for.

Then he found the video and his blood ran cold.

This was what Peter had been talking about (Tony had hoped Peter was confusing his own porn with a text.) He had sent that video, one he had entitled ‘Want’ and dammit, dammitdammitdammit, he had sent it to the boy?! Jesus Christ in heaven saints preserve us. He had hit send on accident. He threw the phone across the room and downed another drink.

This could have been it. This could have been the night he said the wrong thing (sent the wrong thing, dear gods above) and sent Peter running.

“I really am addicted to self-destruction.” He couldn’t drink much more. Peter was staying the weekend and he had to be functional in the morning. Still he looked hard into the glass, talking to himself. “Addicted to pain, just like Pepper said. Pushing them away before I have to open up to them…..no.”

But that wasn’t right. It wasn’t that he pushed people away before he had to talk to them, he pushed them away before they had the chance to betray him, before they had to chance to lie to him, before they had the chance to murder him because he was endangering the company by announcing they wouldn’t sell weapons anymore.

But not Peter.

No, he was just trying to push Peter away before he had to open up to him. That was all.

“A toast to self-destruction,” he said, pouring himself the last drink.

It was a form of pain, he mused, holding on to the razor’s edge of Peter leaving, standing right there at the edge of agony and heartbreak. What if he just….ignored it? What if he just pretended like it wasn’t going to happen? Now that would be self-destruction. Now that would be self-destruction at it’s finest.

Peter had seen him without his armor. Peter had seen him without his meticulous shave and without his fine suit. Peter had made a demand and that’s why Peter had seen him without his biting wit, his constant humor. Without that, he was just Tony. And Just Tony had never been good enough for anyone. Peter wasn’t catching on, not yet, but…

“…I am falling up.” He would never deny that it was sweet here, this razor’s edge of heartbreak. Yes, obviously, that would make it all the more unbearably painful when Peter wised up and left, but until then?

Tony drained the glass and left it behind. No tinkering, he was going right back to bed to hold his sleeping lover in his arms. He was dedicated to self-destruction, and, well, this self-destruction was going to be epic.

#The Addcit

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curly-q-reviews · 5 years

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VALENTINES DAY SPECIAL

Below Her Mouth, 2016 (dir. April Mullen)

WARNING SPOILERS AND LOTS OF SEX TALK AHEAD TREAD WITH CAUTION

HEY Y’ALL we interrupt the regular programming for a special feature!! i always like to do a lil valentines day special viewing for the sake of being festive and for once ive actually gotten some dating action in my life so i was in the mood to watch some sweet romance and then review it for ur reading pleasure (emphasis on the PLEASURE ehugeguehgehgeugeghe) (assassinate me now i deserve it)

to preface this, i am VERY gay. well uuhhh bi but a very GAY bi u know?? basically i curse my attraction to men every waking moment of my life. ive known about this since my last few years of college and am out to basically everyone whos important, and a lot of my friends are lgbtq+ so u know its official and everything. i dont really claim to be a Gay Expert cause i actually am still lacking a lot of uuhhh physical experience if u catch my drift HOWEVER like a true scholar i have done my fair share of research. which mainly includes watching really shitty lesbian movies and mocking them (and every so often watching a rare Good Lesbian Movie and crying A LOT).

if u are of sapphic inclination as well then u probably already know the kind of reputation lesbian romance movies have overall, the prime examples of which would be movies like Room in Rome and Loving Annabelle. these movies all seem to have one thing in common, and its that the directors and writers have no goddamn clue about how to write a convincing and authentic lesbian romance. u also always get the sense that the male gaze is the one being prioritized cause theres always PLENTY of gratuitous sex and the romance part itself is uuhhhh never really developed well or thoroughly enough at all. these movies are usually about a straight girl who discovers her affinity for the feminine when she meets a total stranger and suddenly cant stop thinking about how much she wants to bang her. and then in-between all the banging they somehow find the time to fall madly in love with each other but the straight girl just CANT cause shes STRAIGHT or she has a FIANCE or her PARENTS wouldnt approve or whatever the fuck the conflict of the day is and either it ends with them never seeing each other again or with the straight girl coming to terms with her not-straightness and ***follow her heart*** or whatever

really the only lesbian movies i can recall actually enjoying would be Pariah (PLEASE check this movie out its so heart-wrenching and beautiful and its like a majority-black cast!!!) and Blue Is the Warmest Color (this one i loved at first but the more i reflect on it the more problems i find with it, ESPECIALLY with how much sex is in it). and then The L Word is a stellar tv series up until like the last few seasons which are trash but otherwise it was a great watch for me, especially while i was still figuring things out. i feel like there are more that ive seen that were pretty good but i cant think of them at the moment WHOOPS LOL

so with Below Her Mouth i was apprehensive but hopeful going in, although i had heard rumors that it was Real Bad. and u know i shouldve listened to those rumors and not bothered with this movie cause WOW its bad!!! script is TRASH, acting is TRASH WITH FEBREEZE SPRAYED ON IT, and it looks like an artsy pretentious film student shot it. natalie krill had maybe one good acting moment in the whole 90-minute run time and erika linder is really really hot and those are the only two good things i can think to say about this

fuck ok uuhhh i guess ill talk about the main characters cause OH WOW theyre basically two walking talking cliches. jasmine (yes her name is jasmine that totally doesnt sound like the name of a character in a porn at all) is our Token Straight Girl who has a fiance and is a fashion editor. she first sees our other romantic lead while working on the roof of a house next door to hers. shes ur typical Lesbian Romance Movie Butch, too cool for school and unable to commit to anyone ever and is kind of an asshole but somehow this is supposed to endear u to her. oh and guess what her name is. just guess. ill give u a few minutes.

DALLAS ITS FUCKING DALLAS HOOWEE WHAT A SHOCKER

the first thing we see of dallas, and this is also the first fuckin shot of the movie, is her uuhhh scissoring her girlfriend??? humping her????? i really dont know what shes trying to accomplish but shes clearly not having any fun while doing it and her girlfriends like “i love u” and shes like “im moving out bye” and thats it

real compelling i know

so jasmine and her bff manage to stumble upon the lesbian bar in town (which dallas calls a girl party??? why??????) where dallas meets her and proceeds to be completely and utterly creepy in ways ive only ever seen men be which is the first indicator that the person who made this movie, april mullen, is maybe not gay at all (or maybe she is and just has horrible taste?? idk man). but somehow the creepiness is a real turn on for ol’ jazzy and they start making out IMMEDIATELY but then jasmines like “i have a fiance gotta go!!!!” and yeets herself out of the situation

but of course this is a lesbian romance so u know they meet up again and proceed to have like half an hours worth of steamy gratuitous porn-style sex. there was a lot of strap-on action involved and a lot of bizarre scissoring that i dont even think i can call scissoring cause it was more like they were just weirdly bumping their vagoos against each other and somehow that was getting them both off. like sometimes the sex scenes in this movie bordered on tommy wiseau levels of weird.

oh and of course the fiance finds out about this secret love affair but WOW do they really do this in the most dramatic and unintentionally hilarious way possible. he literally comes home early from his business trip and walks in on dallas going to town on jasmine with a strap on in the bath tub, like theyre ferociously going at it. i swear to god i felt like i was watching a comedy at times with this movie

piggybacking off of that, jesus christ this script is bad. ooooohhhh its so bad. dallas is given the cringiest tough guy lines, like shes drinking beers with a friend and the friend is like “oh man i gotta catch up to u” and, hilariously, dallas is like “you cant catch up cause nO oNe WiLl EvEr CaTcH mE” and i almost choked on my own saliva. oh god wait heres another zinger, so when she first meets jasmine shes like “do u come to girl parties often (again why the everloving FUCK is she calling it a girl party????)” and jasmines like “i don’t come at all” and the next thing to come out of dallas’s suave sexy mouth is “TeRriBLe NeWs CaN i ChAnGe ThAt FoR yOu” OH my GOD

and good god shes so creepy. like some of the shit she pulls is borderline sexual assault. her and jasmine are just at a bar chillin and dallas reaches down and im like “oh ok shes gonna like put her hand on her knee classic move” but NOPE OH NO she just makes a beeline STRAIGHT for jasmines crotch IN THE MIDDLE OF A BAR!!! THERE ARE PEOPLE AROUND!!!!!! OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!

at one point after another round of passionate lovemaking dallas brings jasmine back to her house and theyre in dallas’s truck and they just?? slap each other??? for no reason????? except for True Love i guess????????????

jesus. just. this was an experience. i would say dont bother watching it but i did at least have fun making fun of it so if thats ur sort of thing knock ur socks off, its on netflix. but wow this basically fits the stereotype of a lesbian romance movie PERFECTLY, and when u really break it down its just a fancy porn. i wouldnt even say its a porn geared towards actual wlw cause theres so many elements about the sex scenes that reminded me of the kind of lesbian porn thats made for straight men to jack off to. 0/10 BAD BYE

well shit ok i hope u all had a great valentines day!! im gonna go start a roofing business in the hopes that i end up working on a roof of a house thats right next to a really hot straight girl with a fiance so i can try to finger-bang her in the middle of an occupied bar wish me luck!!!!!

#curly q reviews #valentines day special #valentines day #lgbtq #lesbian #romance #films #below her mouth #netflix

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mardukwhite-blog · 5 years

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I was not raised in a racist home or environment. Living in the South, almost every White person has a small amount of racial awareness, simply beause of the numbers of negroes in this part of the country. But it is a superficial awareness. Growing up, in school, the White and black kids would make racial jokes toward each other, but all they were were jokes. Me and White friends would sometimes would watch things that would make us think that “blacks were the real racists” and other elementary thoughts like this, but there was no real understanding behind it. The event that truly awakened me was the Trayvon Martin case. I kept hearing and seeing his name, and eventually I decided to look him up. I read the Wikipedia article and right away I was unable to understand what the big deal was. It was obvious that Zimmerman was in the right. But more importantly this prompted me to type in the words “black on White crime” into Google, and I have never been the same since that day. The first website I came to was the Council of Conservative Citizens. There were pages upon pages of these brutal black on White murders. I was in disbelief. At this moment I realized that something was very wrong. How could the news be blowing up the Trayvon Martin case while hundreds of these black on White murders got ignored? From this point I researched deeper and found out what was happening in Europe. I saw that the same things were happening in England and France, and in all the other Western European countries. Again I found myself in disbelief. As an American we are taught to accept living in the melting pot, and black and other minorities have just as much right to be here as we do, since we are all immigrants. But Europe is the homeland of White people, and in many ways the situation is even worse there. From here I found out about the Jewish problem and other issues facing our race, and I can say today that I am completely racially aware. Blacks I think it is is fitting to start off with the group I have the most real life experience with, and the group that is the biggest problem for Americans. Niggers are stupid and violent. At the same time they have the capacity to be very slick. Black people view everything through a racial lense. Thats what racial awareness is, its viewing everything that happens through a racial lense. They are always thinking about the fact that they are black. This is part of the reason they get offended so easily, and think that some thing are intended to be racist towards them, even when a White person wouldnt be thinking about race. The other reason is the Jewish agitation of the black race. Black people are racially aware almost from birth, but White people on average dont think about race in their daily lives. And this is our problem. We need to and have to. Say you were to witness a dog being beat by a man. You are almost surely going to feel very sorry for that dog. But then say you were to witness a dog biting a man. You will most likely not feel the same pity you felt for the dog for the man. Why? Because dogs are lower than men. This same analogy applies to black and White relations. Even today, blacks are subconsciously viewed by White people are lower beings. They are held to a lower standard in general. This is why they are able to get away with things like obnoxious behavior in public. Because it is expected of them. Modern history classes instill a subconscious White superiority complex in Whites and an inferiority complex in blacks. This White superiority complex that comes from learning of how we dominated other peoples is also part of the problem I have just mentioned. But of course I dont deny that we are in fact superior. I wish with a passion that niggers were treated terribly throughout history by Whites, that every White person had an ancestor who owned slaves, that segregation was an evil an oppressive institution, and so on. Because if it was all it true, it would make it so much easier for me to accept our current situation. But it isnt true. None of it is. We are told to accept what is happening to us because of ancestors wrong doing, but it is all based on historical lies, exaggerations and myths. I have tried endlessly to think of reasons we deserve this, and I have only came back more irritated because there are no reasons. Only a fourth to a third of people in the South owned even one slave. Yet every White person is treated as if they had a slave owning ancestor. This applies to in the states where slavery never existed, as well as people whose families immigrated after slavery was abolished. I have read hundreds of slaves narratives from my state. And almost all of them were positive. One sticks out in my mind where an old ex-slave recounted how the day his mistress died was one of the saddest days of his life. And in many of these narratives the slaves told of how their masters didnt even allowing whipping on his plantation. Segregation was not a bad thing. It was a defensive measure. Segregation did not exist to hold back negroes. It existed to protect us from them. And I mean that in multiple ways. Not only did it protect us from having to interact with them, and from being physically harmed by them, but it protected us from being brought down to their level. Integration has done nothing but bring Whites down to level of brute animals. The best example of this is obviously our school system. Now White parents are forced to move to the suburbs to send their children to “good schools”. But what constitutes a “good school”? The fact is that how good a school is considered directly corresponds to how White it is. I hate with a passion the whole idea of the suburbs. To me it represents nothing but scared White people running. Running because they are too weak, scared, and brainwashed to fight. Why should we have to flee the cities we created for the security of the suburbs? Why are the suburbs secure in the first place? Because they are White. The pathetic part is that these White people dont even admit to themselves why they are moving. They tell themselves it is for better schools or simply to live in a nicer neighborhood. But it is honestly just a way to escape niggers and other minorities. But what about the White people that are left behind? What about the White children who, because of school zoning laws, are forced to go to a school that is 90 percent black? Do we really think that that White kid will be able to go one day without being picked on for being White, or called a “white boy”? And who is fighting for him? Who is fighting for these White people forced by economic circumstances to live among negroes? No one, but someone has to. Here I would also like to touch on the idea of a Norhtwest Front. I think this idea is beyond stupid. Why should I for example, give up the beauty and history of my state to go to the Norhthwest? To me the whole idea just parralells the concept of White people running to the suburbs. The whole idea is pathetic and just another way to run from the problem without facing it. Some people feel as though the South is beyond saving, that we have too many blacks here. To this I say look at history. The South had a higher ratio of blacks when we were holding them as slaves. Look at South Africa, and how such a small minority held the black in apartheid for years and years. Speaking of South Africa, if anyone thinks that think will eventually just change for the better, consider how in South Africa they have affirmative action for the black population that makes up 80 percent of the population. It is far from being too late for America or Europe. I believe that even if we made up only 30 percent of the population we could take it back completely. But by no means should we wait any longer to take drastic action. Anyone who thinks that White and black people look as different as we do on the outside, but are somehow magically the same on the inside, is delusional. How could our faces, skin, hair, and body structure all be different, but our brains be exactly the same? This is the nonsense we are led to believe. Negroes have lower Iqs, lower impulse control, and higher testosterone levels in generals. These three things alone are a recipe for violent behavior. If a scientist publishes a paper on the differences between the races in Western Europe or Americans, he can expect to lose his job. There are personality traits within human families, and within different breeds of cats or dogs, so why not within the races? A horse and a donkey can breed and make a mule, but they are still two completely different animals. Just because we can breed with the other races doesnt make us the same. In a modern history class it is always emphasized that, when talking about “bad” things Whites have done in history, they were White. But when we lern about the numerous, almost countless wonderful things Whites have done, it is never pointed out that these people were White. Yet when we learn about anything important done by a black person in history, it is always pointed out repeatedly that they were black. For example when we learn about how George Washington carver was the first nigger smart enough to open a peanut. On another subject I want to say this. Many White people feel as though they dont have a unique culture. The reason for this is that White culture is world culture. I dont mean that our culture is made up of other cultures, I mean that our culture has been adopted by everyone in the world. This makes us feel as though our culture isnt special or unique. Say for example that every business man in the world wore a kimono, that every skyscraper was in the shape of a pagoda, that every door was a sliding one, and that everyone ate every meal with chopsticks. This would probably make a Japanese man feel as though he had no unique traditional culture. I have noticed a great disdain for race mixing White women within the White nationalists community, bordering on insanity it. These women are victims, and they can be saved. Stop. Jews Unlike many White naitonalists, I am of the opinion that the majority of American and European jews are White. In my opinion the issues with jews is not their blood, but their identity. I think that if we could somehow destroy the jewish identity, then they wouldnt cause much of a problem. The problem is that Jews look White, and in many cases are White, yet they see themselves as minorities. Just like niggers, most jews are always thinking about the fact that they are jewish. The other issue is that they network. If we could somehow turn every jew blue for 24 hours, I think there would be a mass awakening, because people would be able to see plainly what is going on. I dont pretend to understand why jews do what they do. They are enigma. Hispanics Hispanics are obviously a huge problem for Americans. But there are good hispanics and bad hispanics. I remember while watching hispanic television stations, the shows and even the commercials were more White than our own. They have respect for White beauty, and a good portion of hispanics are White. It is a well known fact that White hispanics make up the elite of most hispanics countries. There is good White blood worht saving in Uruguay, Argentina, Chile and even Brasil. But they are still our enemies. East Asians I have great respent for the East Asian races. Even if we were to go extinct they could carry something on. They are by nature very racist and could be great allies of the White race. I am not opposed at all to allies with the Northeast Asian races. Patriotism I hate the sight of the American flag. Modern American patriotism is an absolute joke. People pretending like they have something to be proud while White people are being murdered daily in the streets. Many veterans believe we owe them something for “protecting our way of life” or “protecting our freedom”. But im not sure what way of life they are talking about. How about we protect the White race and stop fighting for the jews. I will say this though, I myself would have rather lived in 1940's American than Nazi Germany, and no this is not ignorance speaking, it is just my opinion. So I dont blame the veterans of any wars up until after Vietnam, because at least they had an American to be proud of and fight for. An Explanation To take a saying from a film, “I see all this stuff going on, and I dont see anyone doing anything about it. And it pisses me off.”. To take a saying from my favorite film, “Even if my life is worth less than a speck of dirt, I want to use it for the good of society.”. I have no choice. I am not in the position to, alone, go into the ghetto and fight. I chose Charleston because it is most historic city in my state, and at one time had the highest ratio of blacks to Whites in the country. We have no skinheads, no real KKK, no one doing anything but talking on the internet. Well someone has to have the bravery to take it to the real world, and I guess that has to be me. Unfortunately at the time of writing I am in a great hurry and some of my best thoughts, actually many of them have been to be left out and lost forever. But I believe enough great White minds are out there already. Please forgive any typos, I didnt have time to check it.

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waspalisades · 6 years

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we learned abt the playboy of the western world riots today in class and i couldnt stop thinking abt tumblr culture shutting down movies before theyve even come out

like ofc theres everyone squicked out by cmbyn FILLED w vitriol who havent even watched it, nor do they plan on watching it to actually see for sure

which is not the same!! as someone who experienced abuse by an older person, esp as a teen, knowing that the premise would trigger them (like ACTUALLY trigger, not the misappropriation of the term) and avoiding the movie in their own best interests. nothing like that. just ppl who enter a moral outrage at the IDEA of a movie that doesnt overtly condemn its age gap.

and i agree with the source of the anger! in 2018, a 24 y/o and a 17 y/o is sus! but being a gay person in 1983, oliver probably thought he might never meet another gay man, especially not one interested in him. elio has contact w gay men, but internalized homophobia towards them and himself complicates it further. now, that situation would be made SO different. elio could have met someone his age and been OUT. even oliver in a disapproving family could have an lgbt network online so he wouldnt be alone. but right before the height of the aids epidemic? unthinkable. context complicates the morals of the situation.

and media doesnt always punish the bad and uplift the good, either. god, i had to unfollow so many people after tlj came out. yall were PISSED for WEEKS bc of all the hope and emotional investment that it would deliver exactly what u decided u wanted. but encountering different perspectives throws deeply couched ideologies for a loop, and instead of measured responses comes red-hot rage and dour disillusionment. they are Cancelled, never to be seen or heard from again.

(again, not the same!!! as ceasing support of people who have abused their power and success, i.e., sexual abusers, esp. those who have not issued an apology before public accusation)

the potww riots didnt happen bc a man mentioned a lady's shift. the audience was horrified that good irish folks onstage were praising a man for killing his father, and the sexual impropriety became the settling detail for declaring the play immoral and protesting its performances. english occupation jumped at chances to "prove" the irish were wild and savage, so unable to self-govern. this seemed to confirm that the stereotypes projected upon them were true, and outraged at the betrayal by a fellow countryman, they responded in wild condemnation to save their reputation. (of course, the riots about potww were very well used by the english as evidence of savagery, same as anything else. colonies never win against their invaders.) the first riot broke out before the end of the play, and people who came after that to protest ensured that nobody could hear from the start. they came already knowing the immorality of the play, and unwilling to hear it through to the end.

synge may not have been trying to make a statement about irish people. he was a realist and a naturalist, and capturing the language and attitudes of a rustic location were important to him. the glee at a violent outburst in the play could be a commentary on the "vitality" he wished to imbue in realist theatre, commentary on how british occupation has driven irish native residents to crave revenge (psychological release of father-killing = imagined colonizer-killing?), or commentary on how humanity as a whole accepts the same actions moral authorities wish us to condemn when we need to construct a hero figure. it could be all 3, or none. point is, any good work will allow literary critics a field day in many different directions, and being able to read works you dont think youll like (or at least identify WHY you dont, including "its just not my cup of tea" as a totally valid response) is an essential part of learning, growth, and being alive.

besides, perfect moral purity of media consumption is nigh-impossible. everyone has their Thing that they know is ...not...great when it comes to its political stances, but they enjoy them anyway. mine are bond movies. sexism is shit, but espionage! explosions! luxe clothes and casinos! fight scenes! critical analysis of bond has been absolutely driven into a rut, but i still watch them, bc i wish i could do bond things instead of work at a fast food joint. thats all. if i only watched movies with ACTUAL strong women, not just women who punch things, i would never watch anything but the 5 indie films not eviscerated by feminists that year, and even then im not sure i would think they were any good. i can promise you there would be 0 fight scenes to enjoy.

tl;dr: i want better rep in media, for everyone. i think we all want that. but sometimes people are just shit, both within and behind created media, and even shit people have lessons to impart about human consciousness and life on earth. until we experience said media, we cannot condemn it for existing in a questionable way, especially when questions serve to test and strengthen our ideology better than answers.

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cartoonfangirl1218 · 4 years

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Winner’s Curse Ch. 15

There was only darkness. All consuming darkness enveloping everything until there was nothing left.

She couldn’t breath!

How many hours had it been? Days?

She was going to die here.

Lala made another attempt to fight against her bonds but the rope tied around her throat pressed harshly against her windpipe and she gagged.

She tried to breath through her nose but all she inhaled was the dank smell of molding rope.

There was no fresh air. No fresh air.

Her insides constricted painfully as her dread rose up again at the thought of all the stale air in this enclosed room.

This small room that was getting smaller by the second it seemed. Wiith every breath she took she was sure that the sides were pressing closer not that she could tell by anyway since she couldn’t touch anything.

She had woken up in this.. Closet? Cell? She wasn’t sure what it was but she knew the door was iron and the walls were made of limestone. It had that familiar cave smell.

And she never felt comfortable in caves.

She wasn't really comfortable in any enclosed space and her mother knew that. She had grown up in the jungle with its open spaces and the sky above her head. Yes, it could be crowded with vegitation hiding the presence of other predators but it was outside. She could escape whenever she wanted to. She could breath all the air she could inhale.

Rooms and houses were just traps waiting to be sprung. Small places where space was cluttered by furniture and people and air turned stale. The same air moving through the room with no fresh oxygen. Stale air that she was sure if she stayed in the room long enough would disappear. There would be no air.

She couldn’t breath.

When she had woken up from the duel, and found herself here in thsi room that wasn’t even big enough for her stand straight or hold her arms out to her sides. She banged and screamed until she was hoarse and her hands bled. She was sure she had torn up her nails scratching against the unmoving door.

Worse, the floor was also cold tile. There was no dirt. No nature. Just unforgiving stone that wouldn’t yield to her strength or banging.

Her mother didn’t usually punish her this way. Normally, she beat in her in a dual and that would be it. In fact her mother was mostly disgusted by her clustraphobia and warned her not to act so fidgety about being indoors, it could be used against her.

Like now.

She hadn’t cared how weak it was that the moment she realized she was trapped that she started yelling and begging her mother to be let out. She screamed all the apologizes and praises she knew her mother would have wanted to hear from her but nothing.

The only thing she attracted was that officer person. She had briefly, too quickly saw the light of another place when he opened the door but he shut it again before she could escape. He wrestled her to the ground and forced her against a pole he had planted in the middle of the small room. He tied her arms behind her back and hobbled her legs. And for extra measure he tied her torso and wrapped a thick cord against her neck “to stop the infernal screeching.”

Her dread over the lack of oxygen increased tenfold. Her whole body screamed in agony as a wave of dizziness washed over her just like the darkness of the room when Staqauit closed the door.

Her stomach felt like there was a leapord cub clawing from the inside, growling too, reminding her that she hadn’t eaten since last night…. Or whenever it was since she last eaten. Her lips echoed the sentiment, parched and dry for want of water.

And through it all, she couldn’t make a sound as the cord choked her, twisted around her canine necklace sending little pricks of pain on her collarbone, and she feared that she would bring upon her own death if she struggled harder.

This was all her own fault. Deciding that nothing could go wrong if she trusted some Auradon royals and their genie. And Jay. Of course, there was Jay. She had known he was a famed silver tongue liar and yet she so wanted to believe his plan… that she could be greater than her mother, rule her own kingdom that she went against her mom.

Stupid!

She could never go against her mother. What was it that she said before she knocked her out? The whole event was becoming blurry now or maybe she was about to faint again. Unconsciousness seemed preferrable at this point. Death maybe. At least she wouldn’t have to wait as all the air was sucked out of the room…

“What!?”

Thinking of mothers.

“I told you to punish her for the night. Not keep her there for two days!”

“You just said punish. If you wanted her out, you should have come down yourself.” Staqauit’s french accented voice protested.

“I have other things to attend to. UGh. I’m surrounded by idiots.” Queen La complained and like a blessed savior opend the door.

Lala gasped, hope rising at the light beaming on her face but La smacked her hand over Lala’s eyes hiding her gaze from the wonderful light of the outside world.

“You’ll be blinded if you look too much.” La spoke in low tones among curses and muttered annoyances as she cut the ropes.

Lala managed to nod, gasping as the cord around her neck fell away.

Air! Fresh oxygen She only wished at this moment that her nose and mouth was bihhher so she could inhale more. She needed more.

Lala managed to stumble her way out but her legs were still too rubbery from disused and La ended up half carrying/half dragging her through the halls. Lala pressed her face against her mother’s chest, inhaling the smell. It was the familiar scent of herbs, oleander and oddly, some metallic ting was part of it too. But it was better. It wasn’t the stale air from there.

Lala managed to move her mother’s hands away so she could glimpse her surroundings.

That was another mistake.

It was odd opening her eyes after clenching them shut for the past hours. They felt heavier and the brightness made her stumble back. It was too bright, too overwhelming and it made her head hurt. Her head swayed as if it was going to disconnect from the rest of her body.

Lala could hear her mother speaking but couldn’t comprehend anything. Her mind was barely coherant beyond the relief of fresh air.

Like teleportation or maybe she had fainted again, when Lala looked around again, she found herself lying down on some velvet thing.

It was soft. So soft. Her head was pounding and the pain of her hollow hungry stomach made itself more accute with a consistant piericng.

She forced herself to lift her head though the effort was insurmountable. She was in another room. But it was not a cell. It was a spacious bedroom that had bright colored rugs and shimmering diamonds. Looking down she saw she was lying on a red velvet ottoman, matching the aesthetic of the queen-sized bed across the room.

It must have been Queen La’s new quarters. That was the only explanation for all the animal skins hung up like trophies or lying around as throw rugs. And the diamonds. Queen La always boasted that her former kingdom, Opar was known for its diamonds. That explained the metallic scent on her.

Lala laid her head down again and waited for sleep to take over. Now that she was safe, she never wanted to wake again.

She shifted uneasily and attempted to right herself into a comfortable position where she wouldnt lie on her still-bruised sides which seemed to be both of them when a icy splash of water dripped down her face.

Lala reflexively scratched at the water but made no move to get up or hide from the watery attack. It felt cool. It tasted sweet against her cracked lips and sore throat, and it made her feel a little less digusting after being shut up with no way to go the bathroom but standing up where she was tied.

A hard apple was shoved in the direction of her mouth and Lala obediently bit it, cradling it against her cheek as she curled into a ball.

“I know you were trapped there for two days but you don’t have to act like you’re suffering from yellow fever.” Queen La huffed.

Lala didn’t reply. Queen La never really cared to hear any opinions or statements besides her own.

The cold water streaming down her body stopped and La grabbed Lala’s chin, “I hope this incident sinks in your head.”

Lala shrank back but La’s grip was firm, “I won’t go against you.”

“You better not. Ranavalalona, I have taught you almost every skill you know. Hunting. Tracking. Vine swinging. Fighting. Do you remember me teaching you that move? The punch to the throat?”

Lala racked her brain, searching her memory for that lesson on dirty fighting tactics but it didn’t come to mind. “No?” “That’s because I didn’t. I have taught you how to fight but I haven’t taught you everything about fighting.”

Lala nodded understandingly. She had suspected that for some time for whenever they dueled, La always managed to use some new move that she never suspected. And then she’d lose. She’d remember it for next time of course but La always came up with a new tactic. Sometimes she wondered if her mother would ever run out but it hadn’t happened yet.

“You’re a great fighter. Greater than any of those “scrappers” on that civilized side of the Isle. We’re better than them. We can grapple against the wild and win. For the most part.” La looked pointedly at the scar on her thigh. ““You’ve done well. You’ve survived this long.”

The “Unlike your siblings” went unspoken between them but she knew that was what she meant. Lala knew she should be proud of that distinction, she was stronger and better, but she wished that wasn’t true.

She wished her siblings had lived longer so she wouldn’t be alone. She had no companions because none of these city dwellers were worthy of her time according to Queen La. She missed their company, how they instinctively understood her because they’d been raised the same way. She missed their private jokes and a dozen other little things that she hadn’t realized she valued of them.

If they were still here, maybe Queen La wouldn’t cast them aside so easily for Tarzan. Strength in numbers after all.

“You can’t learn those fighting moves from anyone else. You can’t learn what I have not taught you which brings me to this. You’re only as good a fighter as I allow you to be.”

That was it. That was what her mother said before she knocked her out.

You’re only as good a fighter as I allow you to be.

“That goes for everything in this life, my daughter. You are so much like me. Stubborn. Powerful. Intelligent. Jealous. But remember, you’re only as powerful as I allow you to be. As intelligent as I allow you to be. As evil as I allow you to be. For I will always be steps ahead of you. And for you to go along with this…..Why in hell were you plotting against me?”

Telling her mother that she wanted the kingdom of Opar for herself would never do. She might as well ask to be put in that closet cell again. Opar was her mother’s kingdom and since her mother was already immortal, she planned to stay queen of Opar. She didn’t believe in having her heirs taking over for her and continuing the royal throne. No, it would just be her’s forever.

And if Lala was being honest. She didn’t particularly want to be Queen of Opar anyway. Ruling and lording over others didn’t seem so appealing. But maybe that was because she never had a chance to. After all, her mother seemed to enjoy it. She had wanted to use her genie wish to be Queen because it was something her mother wanted.

Queen La had told her for years that she considered her a “bastard” child. She was a lesser child compared to the ones Queen La would inevitably have with Tarzan. She was lesser than children that didn’t even exist! It was infruriating. And getting to rule Opar would have been a sweet revenge against Queen La. She, Ranavalalona, queen of kingdom while her mother had no kingdom and no Tarzan.

“They had a genie. They said if I helped, I could have a wish.” Lala stood by the partial truth.

La looked at her suspiciously, “What were you going to wish for?” “I don’t know,” she lied, “I just wanted the wishes.”

“Hmmm,” La considered her for a moment then smiled. “You’re ambitious. But remember, you’re only as ambitious as I allow you to be.”

Lala nodded again sensing La wasn’t finished.

“But I suppose I have been too trusting with you being alone. You do need things to be occupied with. So from now on, you will join me in preparimh for my glorious return to Opar. Now you won’t be princess since I’ll be with-”

“Tarzan” Lala said simultaneously with her mother.

“But you would make a lovely high preistess. The staff you’ve made out of my old one works very well. You’ve figured things out without me?” “Yes. I used your old spell-book.” Lala answered.

“Good, good. You can also be an army captain. We don’t want your hunting skills to go to waste. Perhaps we could also use Tarzan and Jane’s children as soldiers too. I mean they may have their mother’s weak blood running through them but any children of Tarzan’s must be excellent fighters. You could marry one of his sons. Yes, yes, pairing the spares is good.” Queen La said more to herself as she got more involved in planning for the future.

“Kerchak. Tarzan has a son named Kerchak.” Lala informed. She had asked Aziz whether Tarzan had any children. Not that she was interested in mating in him as her mother was planning. She was genuinely curious about what happened to her mother’s enemies.

Besides Kerchak sounded boring, Aziz said Kerchak was into animal conservation which she had a feeling that hunting and enslaving leapord men did not fall under animal conservation.

Lala slowly sat up, rubbing her bruised muscles, “Maybe I can solely be high preistess. After hunting for so long I.. I want someone else to do it for me.”

“Yes, yes, you can have Kerchak do that for you.” Queen La waved her off, searching through one of the closets and throwing a dress and Lala’s staff to her feet. “I can’t wait to see Jane die! It’ll be wonderful. After everything they put me through. Becoming a rat. A rat! I, the queen of Opar reduced to such a disgusting… I mean honestly how blind Tarzan is not to see that we’re perfect mates.”

Lala felt that rare spark of hope rise in her chest while her mother talked. She had wanted to stop hunting for survival. Her life had been so consumed by it all, every day, every night. Training to become better. Training to become tougher. Leaving no time to explore other things or have fun. The few times she had had time alone to flip through the branches or tree surf, her mother yelled at her for wasting her time playing around.

These past six months had been a welcome reprieve as animals were too scared to venture into La’s territory. And La being so preoccupied gave her time to try to study her mother’s old staff and master new spells. It was thrilling to see learn how capable she was and stretch her mind in a different way than relying on muscle memory and instincts. Until then, she had been feeling empty. Aimless with no goals.

And didn’t she deserve to have someone else hunt for her. After risking herself every day for almost 13 years?

Lala sighed and started getting dressed. The new outfit was surprisingly comfortable for an outfit that wasn’t made of fur as she was used to. It was made of black silk, she thought and it covered her whole body instead of being the usual revealing two piece. It covered the scars that La always held against her so now she looked unblemished and perfect. It was an outfit for royalty. A royal that was not responsible to hunt or do any physical labor.

And her scar, the one that circled around the back of her left leg was completely covered. How she always wanted to rid herself of it. She had been so happy to be able to use her mother’s staff and it’s blood magic to get rid of most of the offending sights. But it only healed wounds that were fresh and bloody. She had gotten that one months ago. She hated how her mother held it against her. She hated the memory of when she got it, fighting hyenas before leaving Ewuare. Leaving Ewuare to bleed out. Never seeing him alive again. Lala inhaled deeply, the memory of his blood stinging her nose. No no no she couldn’t go back to that memory. She had been a wreck for a month after though it felt like a millennium since. Her mother hadn’t disparaged her for moping for him or lectured that he was weak and shouldn’t be pity.

La had also been sullen after Euware’s death. She looked at him as the child with the most potential since he got less scars than Lala, and he had survived so long. Sometimes she just had to look. A sick fascination with how looking at it brought her flashbacks to that moment. She didn’t want to forget how he got it. She never could forget it. But the stupid fucking reminder of how jealous she was... it always led to heartbreak.

Lala shook herself as if shaking the bad memories away and looked at her new outfit.

Diamonds lined the sleeves and collar and Lala couldn’t help but smile. She looked like she was a princess. For all her mother’s talk that she was a bastard child, she gave her this. She wanted her to marry Kerchack.

Her mother’s one obsession had been having Tarzan as her mate for he was her physical match. Atheltic, strong, beautiful. Unless the person could battle a wild cat with his bare hands, she shouldn’t associate with them.

She alway told Lala to stay away from the people from the urban part of the Isle because they were unworthy of her time. They were like Jane Porter. Physically incapable, weak, acting as if smarts made up for the fact that when faced with a tiger, they would be mauled. She had always treasured that warning because it was a little sign that she cared. La cared enough that Lala was of her blood that she wanted her up to the same standard of mate as she.

La shook Lala’s shoulder and pointed to the doorway where three leopard men stood sentinal.

Lala gasped. After hearing all the stories of her mother’s ungrateful leapord men servants, they were in front of her!

“I’ll call you later when I need you. You stay here and start getting used to being indoors. You need to get over your stupid clustraphobia. These three will be yours.” Queen La informed her. “Now leopard men can be very stupid so don’t vaporize them if they annoy you.”

“I think that’s more of a warning for you.” Lala said to the ground to avoid looking too impertinent.

Queen La paused at the door, looking as haughty as ever despite her words confirming what Lala had already thought, “We started with twenty leopard men and now we’re only down to six so save them up.”

Lala was trying so hard not to laugh that she missed the fatal clicking of lock in a key. Her heart started to beat a fast tattoo but she stuffed an apple in her mouth to keep from panicking.

At least she could move about the room. Even though it was still an enclosed room with no windows for air. She paced, the movement always seemed to calm her and she took deep breaths. The air wasn’t going to leave the room. After all, so many people were able to handle living indoors without dying. She was going to be fine. Too bad her heart wasn’t agreeing with the rationality of her argument.

‘Knock knock’

Her mom was back! “Oh yes!” She could start practicing living indoors tomorrow. She needed to get out.

The door flung open and Lala nearly barrelled over a strange girl in a jewel-encrusted purple dress she didn’t recognize.

“Woah there. So you’re the new “princess”?” The tan girl asked with air quotes and a smile. The fresh scent of jasmine and blood lilies floated the air around her. It was sweet but there was some..some tang to it that Lala found unnerving.

Lala moved past the girl so she was safely out in the hallway and her three leoaprd men followed her on their hind legs.

“Who are you?”

“I’m Jade, future princess of Agrabah. I wanted to meet my fellow royal.” Jade held out her hand for a shake which Lala ignored. The girl was still smiling, being friendly. She didn’t trust her friendliness. Friendliness or submissiveness from a stranger was like a possum pretending to be asleep. It was a trap.

Besides she said she was going to be princess of Agrabah, she must have the same deceptive lying trait as Jay. That explained the scent. Seems sweet but her gut was unnerved. She wouldn’t allow herself to be tricked by her.

“What are you talking about?” Lala did not let down her guard and backed away from the girl. She didn’t have her spear, but she was sure knocking her over the head with her staff would work just as well. Or use her fists. She remembered that despite how Jay boasted so much of his physical prowress, he usually relied on his wits.

Jade didn’t seem concerned of Lala’s defensive stance and started walking alongside her as if they were strolling and making conversation which they sort of were.

Lala hesitated, unsure of whether to continue or not. If she was going to keep her mom happy, she better start acting more like her. After all, the way to defeat an opponent was to act and think like her.

For though she couldn’t defeat Queen La herself, she could defeat others by acting like her. She knew that her mother would never deign to converse or be friendly to someone who was inferior to her. This Jade looked like she couldn’t climb a tree to save her life. Not a worthy companion at all. However, Jade was chatting away and Lala snapped back to attention. She couldn’t look like she was not aware of her surroundings. That’s when others thought they could stage an ambush.

“Well the Coven is planning to take over Auradon next week so all the members are getting their children ready to be royals. Trust me, it’s becoming a real pain. My mom paid me no attention for the past six months and now I have sorcery lessons every single day.” Jade explained in a what Lala considered to be too loud a volume. She had been trained to always speak in a low voice, loudness attracted attackers and hid the noises of people hunting you.

But the feeling of cracked stone under her bare feet reminded her. That was the way of the jungle. She was in a castle now. People could talk as loud as they wanted without fear that their surroundings were camouflaging animals waiting to attack. She could talk as loud as she wanted. But still, the volume unnerved her.

Lala considered what Jade was saying. That probably accounted for her mother’s sudden interest. Well that and the fact that she tried to stop her plan. Maybe this dress and leopard men were simply distractions.

Despite her desire to act more like her mom, and her mom would never listen to the chatter of a stranger, Lala thought about what Jade was saying.

If so, would all these promises be forgotten once her mother got the throne and her desired children. Or would she continue to pile on the gifts in order to appease her and keep her under her control?

“And the others have let the power go to their heads. If I have to hear one more thing about Ginny’s skin routine or Zevon’s “introductory” speeches to his future subjects, I’m going to scream. I can handle being around Celia and Yzla but they get to escape to check their parent’s shops. Lucky them.” Jade continued talking much to Lala’s confusion as she barely knew any of the names she was dropping.

“Why are you here with me then?” Lala grabbed her arm away from Jade who was getting too touchy feely and trying to hook her arm in hers. Another mistake of her mom was around to witness. Do not act like you weren’t in control.

“I’m curious about you. Are you ready to be a princess after being a nobody all this time? Are you ready for a new life?” Jade asked, her voice drifting away as if she was unsure herself. The stinging scent of doubt radiated off her and Lala forced herself not to cringe from the strength of it and focus on the question she had been asked.

Lala shrugged, after all she didn’t have to answer to this desert princess. Internally, she thought she was ready to join her mother’s new Opar. At least when she was putting on the dress, it sounded like a good idea even though staying under her mother’s thumb and being her bastard high preistess child was not exactly a dream come true.

But she would get used to it. When the barrier had broken down and magic was allowed in, Queen La had performed the same ritual that gave her cat-like abilities. The pluses included greater touch, smell, taste and hearing and her body was far more flexible. And she had been so proud. Another thing that made her more like her mom. She wanted to be like her mom because maybe then, someday, she wouldn’t lose to her.

The one drawback that made Lala regret the whole ritual were the cyan cat eyes. Lala hadn’t thought she would get used to her greater peripheral vision and seeing 200 degrees instead of 180. Plus she had to get used to no longer seeing at far distances or any bright colors. But she did get used to it. Her mother trained her once again so she could act like a functional human that didn’t bump into trees while taking advantage of her cat like grace and senses. She had gotten used to the death of her siblings when she had thought she’d die of loneliness and longing for their company. She got used to being alone.

Just like all that, the death, the transformation, she never thought she would feel normal but then she got used to it. She supposed she could get used to being princess. Ahem, high priestess as her mom would correct her if she were here.

Since Lala offered no real answer, they lapsed into silence, walking down the hall, and down the stairs, pausing at a dungeon door.

Jade stood stock still and tensed, making Lala tense up too.

Inside the dungeon it was dark and quiet, nightime she judged by the sound of Maleficent’s goons snoring and the lack of agonized screams. Inside one of the cells underneath the overpowering smells of dirt, agony, blood and excrement, she smelt sand and what was that food he spoke of? Baklava.

Aziz.

Forgetting about Jade, or the fact that she was indoors, Lala strode forward for a closer look. Jade followed and paused at the door standing by the guard which Lala saw was Jay.

An entranced Jay who made none of his flirty or smartass remarks. He smelled different. He didn’t smell of sweat, cologne or dirt. He smelled dull. No personal scent. Just like there was no liveliness in his eyes. His pupils were red and shining and he looked like he was in a daze. Whatever his father had done to him, made its mark.

Jade looked pityingly at her cousin, opening her mouth and closing like she was having a silent telepathtic conversation.

Seeing as no one else was around and she doubted Jade would care, Lala entered the cell.

She breathed in deeply, cringing from the smell of human blood. So different from animal’s in its metallic tanginess. Her knees buckled remembering the last time she smelt that human blood and how Euware bled out.

She crouched down and put Aziz’s face on her lap. Though it had only been a few days, she had to admit, she gotten an appreciation for that boy. He was so unlike all the other arrogant blowhards on the Isle. Showing off their skills. He stayed on the sidelines and he observed and that was what made him intriguing to her. He told her all his little observations and the idiosyncrises of people and even used them against them like when they interrogated Abis Mal.

If he was stranded in the jungle, he would be one of the ones who survived because he noticed his surroundings and the small details and could make it work to his advantage. She respected that. At least it was fun people watching next to him. She never really had fun with anyone before. Even with her siblings, an internal competition to see who could be the best always run undercurrent for anything to be truly fun.

Plus he spoke monkey! She didn’t know many people who could discern the language of wild animals, and it was adorable how he tried chatter about as if it was a normal conversation... Not the point. Not the point.

Not that he could watch anyone now. Aziz’s face was purple, a large egg sized lump was in the place of his left eye and Lala was hesitant to lift the rest of his torn shirt to see what else was underneath.

Using her staff, she rubbed the ruby sphere around, soaking up some of the blood and recited the healing spell she had learned.

“Take this blood

Strengthen its endurance.

Break this earthly cycle

Set the spirit free.

Spill it before fire

And heal unto me.

Please heal unto me.”

Aziz made a gasping choking sound and bravely opened his right eye, “Huh La?”

“I didn’t heal all of you. Just the bad scarring. If I did all of it, people would get suspicious.” Lala whispered, trying to ignore how cold his skin was. So cold like Euware’s.

Her heart tugged more insistantly but she refused to let the pain show on her face. This wasn’t like when she found Euware dead. Euware was her brother. Aziz was just some guy she met. He meant nothing no matter how much she respected him. After all, look at him now after two days of beatings and torture. He was sure to die and she should be allowing him to do. It was the law of the jungle, survival of the fittest. She shouldn’t being pitying the loss of a life who wasn’t strong enough to survive. Even though sometimes she wished there was a third option between struggling life and waiting for death. Something like what the Auradons do. Enjoy life and not fight each day for existence. And hanging out and talking with Aziz these past few days. She had actually sat back and relaxed for once. She wished she could spend more time with him doing that. “No!” She reminded herself.

None of those Auradon kids or Jay meant anything to her. They were just a means to an end.

Future subjects. Future corpses. Non-warriors. Not worthy to be in her presence.

“Are we getting out of here?” Aziz whispered hoarsely.

“No.” Lala gulped back the surprising lump that formed in her throat at Aziz’s hopeful question.

Being a high preistess was good occupation for her, she always wanted to learn magic. Though not being a princess was a disappointment. Especially when her mom got to rule, she’d officially be considered a bastard daughter and being replaced by Tarzan’s children.

Yet living as a high preistess in Opar would probably have great perks. She wouldn’t have to struggle every day for survival, she wouldn’t get scars that La would hold over her about her slowness…..

Her mom had proven that she was always ahead of her. Lala couldn’t fight her when her mom always had another tactic up her sleeve.

She was only as powerful as La allowed her to be.

It would be foolish to rebel against her mother. It would mean death. Or at least another stay in that cell. Lala inhaled deeply but tensed. Her eyes were closed but she could feel that the walls were closing in again. Her breath caught and all Lala wanted to do was hug Aziz close and pray for a quick death. But that was weak. This was exactly the kind of weakness her mother saw in her that made her inferior to her hypothetical Tarzan children. She forced herself to sit straight and not take deep breaths. She would breath at a regular rhythm. Like a person that lived indoors, like a person without claustrophobia, and she would become high priestess.

This was the best option. She’d get riches, respect, comfort. That’s what she had thought before any of these Auradonians and genie came along. She remembered the day her mother came back from the fateful Coven meeting, the first time she saw magic. Her mother called them to her in their cave, she, Ewuare and Sarraounia. She had been holding her staff proudly, the one made up of the remnants of her original staff, hapharzedly tied together with jungle vines. Only it was different because it glowed as golden as the sun and it was whole as if it had never been broken.

It was the first time she had seen her mom happy, her eyes alight with bright desire instead of the usual angry bitterness, as she explained about the Coven and their plan to break the barrier and take over Auradon.

She had gone on length about finally killing Jane Porter and marrying Tarzan too, but for once, she didn’t add her diatribe about finally having worthy heirs. Though that still stuck in the back of Lala’s mind when she heard the news. Then in another surprising twist, she had all of them travel to a deserted space in the midst of the jungle. Lala could tell it was former hyena territory by the scarce remains of flesh and the bones scattered about in the brown and bloodied grass. No hyenas though. She had no idea what scared them off in what looked like the middle of their meal since Queen La uncovered their storage of meat and handed it out to them for their dinner. Then La called for Ewuare and her to demonstrate their skills, holding Sarraounia in her lap, the little girl eagerly licking the bone clean. So Lala and Ewuare proceeded to mock-fight and her mom simply watched without criticizing their form or anything. When they finished La gave them a curt nod, “You’re good fighters, well trained.” It was the biggest compliment she had ever received from her mother who could always find flaws in their technique. She and Ewuare looked at each, smiling and unbelieving of their ears. Then Sarraounia jumped out of La’s lap, eager for her own share of attention, showing off her little bit of magic in creating a shadowy baby panther that followed Sarrounia’s movements. That display of magic had been their first hint that the Magic Barrier was getting weaker a week earlier and Queen La was eager to capitalize on Sarrounia’s talent and make her follow in her footsteps as high priestess. Then La waved them off “to go play,” another first and they began racing through the trees before La changed her mind. Lala and Ewuare couldn't quite engage in a fast pace game of tag, swinging and tree-surfing since Sarrounia was only 6 and couldn’t keep up but it was fun it’s own way to teach her and show off their tricks since she was so awestruck by their ability to flip about between branches without falling. She got tired after awhile and left Ewaure to keep playing with Sarraounia to join her mother who was sunning herself while examining her staff. Lala laid down beside her and La noticed her looking curiously at it.

Lala looked away, pretty certain that her mother would snap at her to leave. She was very possessive of things she considered hers. Her staff, her old kingdom, Tarzan.

Instead the final surprise of the day was her mom asking if she would like to know the first spell she learned she was just an apprentice to the one of the Waziri tribe shamans, and the few sacred chants she remembered from her time in the Atlantean court. Her mother rarely spoke of her time in the Waziri tribe beyond the stupidity of the tribe members who exiled her. She spoke even less of her childhood in Atlantis. So for her mother to show her spells from both of times of her life was a special treat. So she sat and listened and for once, her feelings about being a failure and a bastard child to her mother faded away. As her mom talked seriously about the ingredients and focus needed for the spell, she felt like her mom was finally treating her as an equal.

Eventually Ewuare and Sarrounia came to join them as the sun set, her mother weaving tales of the glory of her diamond kingdom of Opar. She told of their lineage. That when the King of Atlantis had three sons. When the eldest, Kashekim Negakh became its new king, the other two brothers and some other families left Atlantis, journeyed past Leviathan and settled on the continent of Africa. The second eldest brother, Wazir’ki became chief of the newly dubbed Waziri tribe, and the third brother, their grandfather became its high priest. And when it came her turn to become high priestess, she staged a coup to gain more power. She DESERVED to have more power. She was more than a priestess, she had royal blood, and so she created her leopard staff and made herself immortal using the forbidden blood magic.

It had felt like being part of family, learning about her past, and what was due to them. She had a wild hope that maybe their mom wouldn’t kick them out once she married Tarzan, that maybe she’d allow them to stay with her in the palace as her “other” children instead of always treating them like her own elite hunting squad. They’d live together as royals, having others doing the hunting for them, and that feeling made she began looking forward to the future if this is what life off the Isle could be like.

She had been so looking forward to that, and she still clung to that feeling even after Euware and Sarrounia died. Though they were no longer with her, she still felt their presence sometimes and she hoped that when New Opar came to being, she’d feel them again along with the completion of their dreams during that faraway day.

Then that feeling faded the more her mom ignored her in favor of fantasizing or her imaginary children, and Lala realized the expectation of her mom treating her an equal and keep her on as her child was fading away the closer La got to her goal.

So Lala had thought she’d bypass the Coven and get her wish to live in relative peace and luxury off the Isle through her genie wish. Internally, she knew her mother her mother was right. She was ambitious, and she wouldn't be content being treated as simple another high priestess when she was of royal blood. She deserved to be among the royals as a princess. But now that opportunity was gone. So she better go to her original plan and obey her mom and she’d live in luxury as her high priestess instead. Pretend she never had that crazy hope that her mother wouldn’t cast her aside.

It was the way to survive and hadn’t everything about her life up till now about survival? No matter how.

Lala straightened her shoulders and affirmed her decision, “No. I’m not helping you out of here. I’m the new priestess of Opar.”

#queen la #lala #my ocs #ocs #jade #lt. staqauit #aziz #my fanfic #my fanfiction #winner’s curse

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theday · 6 years

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anyways, ill say bye now... i hope ure well rested and have a good day!! (wait, i remember what i wanted to ask!! at least i think this is what i wanted to ask? anywys, do u know what u want to do now that ure finished w school? if u dont mind me asking, of course, i understand if u think its a bit personal!) ok, now im done, have a good day!! take care and stay hydrated!! (and now i really did send u a bunch of asks..)

omg i hope u dont mind but ill be answering the stuff from ur last ask here (the one where i… deleted everything) under cut bc itll be 2x longer now

so first !!!!! how i got into kpop!!! it was thanks to my good pal (@.briwoon) boxy! i follow her on twitter and despite her being a day6 stan twt i had her unmuted anyway bc.. after years of being an anime blog on tumblr and seeing all my anime mutuals slowly converting into kpop blogs one by one i was able to filter the kpop out of my brain?? smth like that since back then i wasnt into kpop and i didnt want to unfollow since im mutuals with most of them :-0

another backstory - i was one of those people who never saw themselves getting into kpop? and i think the main reason was bc i thought liking kpop would make u seem lame?? due to the influence from people around me?? but as years went by and as my mutuals changed interests it stopped bothering me and that mindset kind of just? faded away bc who am i to call other people’s happiness bad?? but despite being okay with it i never really made the move to get into any groups lmao that was until i got tired of my interest at that time (seiyuu, japanese voice actors) and my interests would always. not last?? idk so maybe thats why i didnt want to get invested but it happened regardless

anyway usually i wouldnt take notice of her rts but this . this beautiful man with orange hair and minion glasses caught my eye when i was scrolling through my timeline and i was like o worm? oh mu god? hes beautiful? so i slid into her dms and asked her whomst the beautiful man was and she sent me all their mvs after that from congratulations to i smile (the most recent mv at that time, late june) for me to watch :-D now at that time, from what little knowledge i had of kpop.. i understood that groups would be singing and dancing so i was prepared to see some sick moves or smth?? but then. i clicked on miss i smile and my wig flew off? bc… wtf.? they were playing instruments???? and they sounded good ??? so i was like oh my god? a band??????

before day6 i also had (have) a preference for bands and the way their music sounds so i was like?? ready to just. get on board yknow?? i watched how can i say and i saw the lanky noodle wearing glasses and i was like o fuck mu life? i caved and asked boxy for their names and other information and best decision of my life bc.. they really make me happy!!! after that like the day after ? myabe they did a vlive and i was like o shit? what do i do… so i downloaded the vapp and wowie i love it? its my second home…… i watched every vlive they had at that time and i thought that was a lot… (it isnt, compared to mx) and i was just rly content??

(ok i know u asked for kpop and not … day6 or other groups bc im gonna talk abt how i got into mx and astro too bc…… how can i Not.. u can skip this part tho i just wanna ramble abt my loves? ill tell u when u can continue)

that was peak happiness for me at that time.. until… boxy started talking about monsta x in our groupchat (with @.tokayhk) and she would just ramble abt this kihyun fella (who i vaguely knew bc my real life friend likes him and mx and i bought her his pc before along with the guilty clan part 2) so i was like hmm interesting… and honestly? i wasnt going to get into monsta x i really wasnt planning on asking her abt them (since i was scared id lose interest in day6 right after) but then.. she started linking videos and i .. my resolve crumbled down as i heard monsta x yelling and … this beautiful cover (which boxy sent to show us how powerful kihyuns vocals are but i was 2 focused on mister aka minhyukku) and she told us how funny these monsta men are and i was like o h no…………….. eventually one day in late august i asked her to tell me more about these monstas…… aftert that i watched every mxray episode (starting from season 2 bc i dont know 1 comes before 2) and even though i didnt know anyone who was on screen except jooheon i found it really funny and?? it made me laugh so much i love mx?? ya… boxys kind of like my guardian angel?? shes really the reason im living tbh… introducing me to all these lovely people?? thank u miss boxy i love u

now. for the astrosus….. they were a bit different.. because i didnt have boxys help and they were the first group i took interest in solely bymyself so i knew i was in for a wild ride (at first, i couldnt even differentiate brian from sungjin in day6 lmao) after stanning monsta x and day6 i became more?? open to kpop and i started watching unhelpful guides on youtube bc . they were funnie and idk its nice??/ and i stumbled upon the astro one (which wasnt that funny but more helpful than anythng) and i was like. oh worm? the cicada group… bc i watched a short clip of them catching that stupid cicada in their office as it appeared on my tl one day so i clicked on the video ..and after watching that it led me to another video of astro being extra for 6 minutes and those six minutes/????? best six minutes of my life because theyre so fnny and they made me laugh a lot? (combined with the editing from op) so bc they were funnie i decided to look them up and read their profiles/??? i watched their nimdle video and only knew mj bc his tag was the two letters m and j lol but it really made me bust both of my lungs i just?? laughed A Lot

im not sure how i managed to put name to face so quickly but it mightve been bc after the nimdle videos i watched every ddoca and astro play as well as their vlives available bc.. i just inhale the content at godspeed??

for mx and astro i was drawn in by their personalities before their music because they were on more variety shows and had more chances to show dorky they all are which made it way quicker for me to fall for the two groups??? for day6 its a bit sad but the weekly scheduled vlives arent enough for me to tell what kind of people they are (although those r still hilarious) i just wish they would go on more variety shows?? its understandable if they themselves dont want to be on any shows though!!! i love all 3 groups with all my heart :-D

ok if u skipped u can start from here ill be answering the questions now lmao

FIRSTof all,,,,, youre learning how to drive?? thats so cool >:-0 we’re not allowed to learn until we’re like...?? 18?? or 21 idk but not so Soon :-( and its cute u think abt me (or of what to say) but pleaseth stay safe... i hope ur driving lessons go smoothly until u end theM!!! hopefully youll be able to get ur licence :-D

aNDD!!! the thought of drinking warm tea when its cold outside.. is so ?? nice to think about hecc u better drink that tEA and enjoy it !!!! stay warm and comfy miss RM ..... and it even snows there????? thats so cool tbh ?? (i love snow but maybe thats bc it doesnt snow here so i dont know the tru evil of snow but like.... its so.... white and fluffy??) i would ask u 2 take pics and show me but alas...... the time is not right :-( do u know when we’re allowed to expose ourselves?? i forgot rip... but its sometime next month right im excited???? since its near my birthday !!!!!

ok now to answer this ask no i actually have no clue what i want to be after i finish school?? yikEs but last year i (jokingly) said i wanted to be a farmer??? idk if i might actually do that probably not i guess im just freestyling (going with the flow) for now we’ll see where life takes me

and like i said u can ask me anything !!! im fine with it :-) alsooooo please dont ever feel bad about sending too many asks bc its a lovely thing to wake up to and i just?? get rly happy when i see all the asks in my activity :-D!!

#asks #rachel maria #oohh my this got really long #its already the next day so ill quickly answer the nxt set

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